CWCki - User contributions [en]

CWCki talk:Inside the Pickle Suit

2011-02-08T22:52:28Z

Jeremyorkin: I cast my vote

==Candidates for Future Interviews==
Debate future candidates for interviews and vote for them here. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:37, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:How about [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]]? We know Clyde posed as Miyamoto at the time, but Reggie's role has never really been explained beyond the e-mail records. [[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 17:51, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:I would to see [[Pandahalo]] interviewed. Chris was still obsessed with her as recent as August of last year.--[[User:Sack Thaddic|Sack Thaddic]] 18:52, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:What about [[Kacey]]? She actually met in him in real life but there's no information about that on her page. -[[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 21:39, 3 February 2011 (PST)

::*Not to shoot down ideas but PandaHalo is probably out of the question as she's sorta disappeared from the trolling scene, and Kacey wants nothing to do with trolling nowadays. But keep them coming.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:48, 4 February 2011 (PST)
:I like the idea of asking Emily some questions, or maybe try and find someone from Chris's past to see how he was BEFORE the trolls came into his life... like Megan (though she herself is probably out of the question considering their past... but someone like her from Chris's past). --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 11:44, 4 February 2011 (PST)
::Lucas and Mimms? I've heard that they still keep in touch with PVCC, though I doubt they have anything else to add.--[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 21:04, 4 February 2011 (PST)
:[[Alec Benson Leary]] would be a good one. Setting Asperchu aside, I think it'd be interesting to hear about what it's like trying to maintain a dialogue with Chris for up to an hour. Same goes for [[Jackie]], only with e-mail. Obviously, Jackie could get Chris's attention by being a girl, but it was still impressive how she managed to keep him going for as long as she did.--[[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 16:56, 4 February 2011 (PST)
* I also say Jackie (and Lars) since they're the most recent and she got him to make some bizarre videos--[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 17:14, 5 February 2011 (PST)

:Would Vivian Gee be available?--[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 21:04, 4 February 2011 (PST)

I vote Bluespike [[User:BSD|BSD]] 22:56, 4 February 2011 (PST)
Seconded for Bluespike--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 12:52, 5 February 2011 (PST)
*But BlueSpike's always on IRC anyway. Just ask him there. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 13:59, 5 February 2011 (PST)

:I vote for Emily. Out of all of the trolls, Emily comes off as the most enigmatic to me and thus, would be interesting to get some more information on her time in the trolling foxholes. [[User:John Ritter's Nutsack|John Ritter's Nutsack]] 16:00, 5 February 2011 (PST)

I vote for Bluespike since there are a few questions I would like to ask him. [[User:Lucida|Lucida]] 16:15, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Fuck doing Emily, I doubt she has much to say we don't already know. I don't think she'd be interesting to do a Q&A with at all. Pretty much all she did was meet up with Chris at the mall, and we have all the audio from that and her descriptions of what were happening at the time.

That said, I vote for Clyde, but I know he won't fucking do it. He's the only one out of the rest of the candidates besides Ivy that I really want to hear from. I guess a more realistic vote would be for Bluespike, but really I don't think any of them besides Clyde would have very interesting answers. The appeal of Ivy is that all the trolling she did was not really documented in meticulous detail as was with the rest of these people. Clyde has been at it since the beginning, that's the only reason I'd want him to participate. Otherwise, I don't really think there is a whole lot to ask the others. I think the Ivy Q&A will clear up a lot, but we pretty much know EVERYTHING about the rest of these trolls. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 00:37, 8 February 2011 (PST)

I cast my vote for [[Robert Simmons V]], or [[Joshua Martinez]]. They have real life testimony, and the only people who trolled him who actually had a somewhat positive view of him at one point. [[User:Jeremyorkin|Jeremyorkin]] 15:00, 8 Febuary 2011 (PST)

== Format ==
Just curious, would people prefer audio or text? Some trolls will opt for text but in cases where audio is possible, would you want it? There's the work involved in transcribing but I wonder if people will consider them more authentic. Thoughts?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:03, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:I prefer audio. Text is one thing, but with audio you can actually hear some of the emotions involved, which makes the interview a little more interesting and, sometimes, even a little funnier. [[User:John Ritter's Nutsack|John Ritter's Nutsack]] 16:02, 5 February 2011 (PST)

I'd love to have the questions answered in an audio and/or video format, even if Ivy didn't show her face. But I know she didn't want herself out there in regards to Chris, so it's understandable if she wants it in a simply text format. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 20:26, 7 February 2011 (PST)

== The validity of all this (or: Incharacter/Out of character) ==

This is something I really should have thought of before starting this, but I'll bring it up here and see what you all think.

Currently, for the most part and with few tiny exceptions, things on the CWCki are from Chris's point of view. As it's been said elsewhere, this wouldn't be a very interesting wiki as it would be a wiki about basement dwellers who troll Chris if we were to go with the "true" story. Thus, we tend to go with how Chris saw the events.

There is a problem with that, namely that I've seen complaints that this confuses people who aren't sure if these people are real or trolls and more or less doesn't explain what's going on to a new person well. However, being in character helps absolve any sort of liability and responsibility as we're just reporting things as Chris has described them to us through his correspondences, media, etc.

So should we even have these interviews? If so, how should we handle them? I think that any reasonably intelligent person should realize that nothing with Chris is genuine and that it might help to explain their motives and such but at the same time sorta ruins the magic and mystique behind them.

So what do you all think? Thoughts?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:59, 4 February 2011 (PST)

i think this idea is fucking stupid and seriously who gives a shit. honestly, only fucking people who grasp onto this whole troll persona bullshit give a shit. if you're trying to bring life into the cwcki, stop because there will never be more life into it unless we actually fix the articles we have instead of adding more fucking bullshit on top of this. besides, this goes against all this whole CITATION NEEDED bullshit if we're going to ask people about retarded nonsense because i could say anything and fuckers would grasp onto that and take it as word of god. also bluespike is a little scamp -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 23:45, 4 February 2011 (PST)

:I don't hold much say at all, but personally I agree with Clyde, at least on some points. We're really very stingy with citations, and it helps so we don't make up shit, or take some random troll conversations as 'canon'. But pulling in the trolls sort of breaks that, because they could say anything they wanted, and it would be considered canon just because there's no evidence to disprove it. It's an interesting idea, but we have to consider what this means for the CWCki. If this falls through, maybe we should show a marker or something for troll words, something to keep in mind, but not fully accept due to its subjective nature? I don't think in-character shit will be a problem, Ivy could be Edarem for all we know, but as long as he's Ivy on the CWCki, and in this interview, it's all good.

Plus, fixing some articles would be good. I should really get on with helping out. [[User:PerilousSquall|PerilousSquall]] 11:33, 7 February 2011 (PST)

I think this is an awesome idea and I really hope you guys go through with it and continue after Ivy. This is just the opinion of an outsider who has followed Chris since '07 when the /v/ threads first started. And from what I see on /cwc/ this is the opinion of most of the people on the outside looking in on the sagas of CWC. I know people like Clyde and I'm sure others at the PVCC could give a fuck less, but I and many others find the "behind-the-scenes" stories as it were to be quite interesting and intriguing. I know you guys have a certain format for the CWCki, so I think this is the perfect forum to answer questions people still have about the various sagas and the trolls who made them happen. It's all old news for you guys in the know, but not so for the rest of us. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 20:31, 7 February 2011 (PST)

(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise

2011-01-05T21:33:07Z

Jeremyorkin: May be a little unnessecary, but I think it's appropriate.

[[Image:ECP 00024.jpg|thumb|left|C-Chan up in dis mothafucka.]]
[[Image:ECP 00025.jpg|thumb|Even my mama thinks that my mind is gone]]

"'''(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise'''" is Chris's version of [[Wikipedia:Coolio|Coolio's]] "[[Wikipedia:Gangsta's Paradise|Gangsta's Paradise]]", featured in his second album, ''[[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys COMEBACK]]''. The song deals with Chris's struggle against [[Clyde Cash]] from Clyde's point of view.
{{-}}
==The Song==
<center>{{#ev:youtube|KwnraluG1Lk}}</center>

==Lyrics==
[[Image:Coolio13.jpg|thumb|Coolio's reaction to hearing this song.]]
[''sung over Coolio's "Gangsta's Paradise"'']

As I walk through the valley of wallow and dark shame 
I take a look at my life and I realize there's nothing here 
Cuz I've been blastin and laughin so long, that 
Even my mama thinks that my mind is gone

But I ain't never left my computer, dog gone it 
Me be treated like a punk, I take it out on that guy 
[[Chris and hypocrisy|I have too much stress and free time, I can't enjoy it]] 
I am a stressed homeboy imprisoned in lulz

A cheap laugh on that guy's lone expense 
As they croak I see myself worse off than that fool 
I'm the kinda G no one gives a cryin' dime to care 
On my knees in the night ''(sped up)'' 
Saying prayers in the LCD light

We keep spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradi~ise 
We been spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradise 
We keep spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradise 
We keep spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradise

Look at the situation, they got me facin' 
I can't live a normal life, I was raised by the street 
So I gotta lay it down as Clyde No-cash 
Too much internet surfin' got me tauntin' dreams

I'm an stupid 'lil fool with fake sex on my mind 
Got my mouse in my hand and a [[Semen|soda]]-stained keyboard 
I'm loc'd in ninja ding dang ganger 
I keep my homies not here, so I'm a lonely dope, G 

...eath ai-ain't nothing but a heartbeat away 
I'm livin life, yo, do or die, what can I say 
I'm thirteen now, but will I live to see any-MOE?! 
The way things are going I don't know

...me why are why are so blind to see that the ones we hurt are you and me ''(sings 2 times faster)'' 
The... things... we... see... ''(catches up)'' ...hurt are you and me?

We... we...

W-w-we b-been spending most of our lives 
Living in a [[fail|gang--|trollsta's paradise]] 
We keep spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradise 
We keep spending most of our lives 
Living in a grollsta's paradise 
We keep spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradise

Power and no money, money and no power 
Minute after minute, hour after hour 
Everybody's typing, but half of them ain't carin' 
...It's growing on in the kitchen, but I don't know what's hangin'

They gotta learn lame words, learnin' to- er- teach me 
If they can't understand it, how can they reach me 
I guess they can't, I guess they won't 
I guess I front, that's why I know my life is not well spent, G.

We been spending most of our lives 
Living in the trollsta's paradise 
We been spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradise 
We keep spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradise 
We keep spending most of our lives 
Living in a trollsta's paradise

Tell me why are we, so blind to see, that the ones we hurt 
Are you and me? ''(pause)'' Tell me why! We are we! 
So blind to see! The ones we hurt! Are you and me! ''(pause)'' 
''(catches up)'' ...ones we hurt are you and me?

{{Hedgehog Boys}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Clyde's Trollsta's Paradise}}
[[Category:Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]
[[Category:Yo! CWC Raps]]

DeviantART

2011-01-03T00:36:06Z

Jeremyorkin: truth

{{quote|This account will mainly be used to get in touch with choice Fan Artists.|~Cwcipedia DA journal, on why the comments are disabled in all of Chris's pictures}}

'''deviantART''' is a large online art community where artists can host their artwork, and receive comments and critique from fellow artists and art appreciators. Being one of the most popular amateur art websites in the world, deviantART attracts the best and the worst of us. Especially the worst. In the [[Troll|trolling]] world, deviantART is notorious as a den for [[Sonic]] [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|recolors]] and [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|poorly drawn furry porn]], so it's no surprise that [[Chris]] became a member.

== Chris's deviantART accounts ==

* [http://sonichusite.deviantart.com/ SonichuSite] — banned for a kinda nebulously defined failure, likely the blatant pornography from [[Sonichu 7]]. In his next account's Journal, Chris said he [[Chris and Remorse|has no idea why he was banned.]] Reading comprehension is apparently not part of [[Honor Roll|the most prestigious reaches of American education]].
* [http://cwcipedia.deviantart.com/ Cwcipedia] — registered some time before [[CWCipedia]]'s downtime, and Chris used it as his primary breathing hole over the long outage. The account was banned in 28 [[August 2009]] for evasion of the previous ban and posting erotic artwork featuring underage characters (which is to say, [[Rosechu]]'s washing machine pic from [[Sonichu 9|Episode 20]] — it was actually deleted before the account was banned completely).

== Chris's use of deviantART ==

As in the case of [[YouTube]] and [[Wikipedia]], Chris really doesn't understand the point of the website, and all of the finer community aspects of the website flew right over his head. He regarded deviantART as a place to dump his images into, disabled comments, and completely disregarded all comments he received through his userpage. His stated goal was to ''"get in touch with choice Fan Artists"'', but with his usual attitude of "I post images, others listen", we have no idea how this would have worked. In other words, Chris operated just like many other Sonic recolorists who ended up in [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], only that he didn't even allow ''praising'' comments to be posted.

== True and Honest Fans ==

In CWCipedia's [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Communities Communities] page, Chris listed [http://sonichufanclub.deviantart.com/ SonichuFanclub] as an officially sanctioned [[Sonichu]] dA community. All signs point out that the community is ''most certainly'' run by the [[True and Loyal Fanbase]] ''*winkwinknudgenudgesaynomore*''.

{{stub}}
{{CWCipedia}}

[[Category:Websites]]
[[Category:Chris's websites]]

Chris and the law

2011-01-02T23:24:02Z

Jeremyorkin: /* Chris's parents and law */ There's a pretty good chance he was having some sort of tantrum to get him expelled from the scouts.

[[Image:116-CWCCop.jpg|thumb|Chris aways keeps an eye out for criminal scum who would dare steal [[Sonichu]].]]

'''Laws''' are rules set up to help keep citizens in check. They are usually enforced by [[Jerkops|the law enforcement]] of that area and penalties are placed on those who don't follow the laws.

For [[Chris]], however, these just serve as another deterrent in his quest for [[china]].

==Understanding==
{{quote|I have been giving him reasons since the police came in June of [[2008]], and nothing has sunken into that [[Hello, Juffalo|clown head]] of his.|[[Michael Snyder]]}}

[[Image:Impliedshooting.jpg|thumb|left|Chris implying guns are the answer.]]

Like his grip on [[Chris and reality|reality]], Chris's understanding of the law is uneasy at best. He regularly threatens trolls with legal action, and makes no distinction in severity between a troll threatening violence against Chris and a troll uploading a harmless picture of [[Rosechu]] with a [[pickle]] to the internet. As a matter of fact, Chris himself is prone to making [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|extremely violent threats]], such as threatening to murder [[Vivian]] and her entire family because of the [[audiobooks]]. He's done everything from calling the police to convincing his father to write to then-[[George W. Bush|President Bush]] in an attempt to get rid of his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page. He has even attempted (poorly) to impersonate the President in a hilarious attempt to convince the trolls at ED to take down his page.<ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=prev&oldid=1997405266</ref> He's even attempted to contact current [[Barack Obama|President Obama]] to stop people from posting gay ads! Chris also believes that the laws in [[CWCville]] and the laws stated in [[Mailbag 55#Draconian fun!|Mailbag 55]] should be enforced ''in real life.''

Chris himself doesn't have much respect for laws and rules, at least when [[Chris and hypocrisy|their enforcement inconveniences him]]. During his time at [[Get-Tar Region|Target]] he didn't see anything wrong with exploiting the free refill policy and loitering for hours at a time in a privately-owned establishment while harassing female customers and apparently [[Attraction Sign|soliciting sex]]. Chris feels that his [[Virgin with Rage|emotional state]] entirely justifies his actions at times, stating in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]] that he should be excused for disturbing the peace by literally shouting "[[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2: Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart"|NOOOOOOO!]]" loudly in the middle of a crowded mall.

Self-contradictory to a fault, though, Chris is happy to meticulously follow some laws while ignoring others at the same time. In [[Sonichu Special 4]], his cartoon avatar makes a point of obeying the exact speed limit... while on his way to confront [[CChanSonichuCWC]] and commit assault with a deadly weapon upon him. Any intelligent and decent person could tell you which of these laws is more important, but Chris is neither intelligent nor decent. In [[05142010|a May 2010 video]], Chris states that a man deserves twenty years in prison for brutally beating his girlfriend to death with his bare hands, which is just twice the penalty he wants for smoking.

In addition, Chris has very little respect for [[Jerkops|those who enforce the law]]:

{{quote|Verbal Combat had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “[[Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha]]s.” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off. |Excerpt from Chris's [[CWC's Diary|diary]]}}

The above quote pretty much defines Chris's attitude towards law enforcement officials. He feels that it is completely appropriate to flip off, insult, and lie to people who are simply doing their jobs. And, of course, as any rational person (i.e., anyone who's not Chris) would understand, running away from law enforcement officials is a seriously bad idea. Chris is truly a rebel without a cause or effect.

The [[Jackie e-mails Part 2#Chris_lies_about_The_Game_Place|correspondence with Jackie]] revealed that in the trial on the Target incident, Chris thought that his work with the [[The_GAMe_PLACe#Chris_the_TCG_gamer|Pokémon TCG League]] let him off the hook. In reality, the court probably acquitted him either on a technicality or insufficient evidence. Chris probably mentioned the volunteer work because he believed a person's merits, no matter how unrelated, would automatically make one innocent of all charges. It is also telling that he recounted the charge as "Soliciting", whereas the actual charge was "Disorderly Conduct"; he feels that he was only persecuted because of his [[Love Quest]] efforts, and not because he was tard raging.

==Law troubles==
On 11 September [[2004]], Chris was detained at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]] for loitering, and continually arguing with the staff over a number of months. The incident is depicted in [[Sub-Episode 1]]. Chris was banned from returning to the mall on his own and without his parents' company. However, it appears that this ban was lifted or ignored soon afterward.

On 20 July [[2005]], Chris was charged with disorderly conduct and trespassing at Target,<ref name="Criminal Searches">[http://www.criminalsearches.com/details.aspx?id=w1x00xC8&vw=criminal&1=Wpem9DAEtHH%2fFwSXuzfStJ2LvpHgv1YXUU3kPiyr3%2fQ%3d&input=name CriminalSearches.com], which has the Virginia Administrative Office of the Courts as their source</ref> as depicted in [[Sub-Episode 7]] and [[Sub-Episode 8]]. After two hearings,<ref name="Criminal Searches" /><ref>[[MySpace#Lindsay]]</ref> prosecutors chose to drop the case and Chris was not punished.

Five days later, Chris caused an auto accident when he followed another car too closely and rear-ended it. This went to court on 12 September 2005.<ref name="Criminal Searches" /> He was fined $30 and had to pay $56 in court costs.

Chris's various run-ins at [[The GAMe PLACe]] have resulted in the cops being called on him a couple times. At least once after Chris called in his parents after he was initially banned from the location and tried to weasel his way back in, and again when he [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|trespassed on the property]], though he wasn't charged with anything on either occasion.

On 4 [[June 2010]], Chris made yet another pilgrimage to The GAMe PLACe. Chris was armed with his camera, and while Mike was concerned that Chris wanted pictures of his daughter for [[Mass Debating|disturbing reasons]], Chris maintains that he merely wanted a picture of Mike [[Death threats|for use as a dartboard]]. Still disturbing, but in entirely different ways. Chris was caught in the parking lot despite trying to run away, and was questioned by the police, who made him delete the pictures he had taken, and basically told him to quit his shit. Chris made his [[6 June 2010]] video in response to these events.

==Chris's parents and law==

It's not hard to figure out why Chris thinks the law should serve him and him alone. His parents, too, have the same problem.

* When Chris was thrown out of the [[Wikipedia:Cub Scouting (Boy Scouts of America)|Cub Scouts]] after an [[autism|unknown incident]], his parents attempted to sue the [[Wikipedia:Boy Scouts of America|Boy Scouts of America]] for [[Kick the autistic|discrimination]].<ref>[[Mailbag 18]]</ref>
* When Chris threw a tantrum that required him to be restrained, Bob attempted to sue the school.
* When [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] took a picture of Chris and uploaded it to the Internet, Chris's parents threatened them with legal action (but never followed through).
* When [[Snorlax]] thought she had indigestion (actually [[Wikipedia:colitis|colitis]]), she acted like she was going to sue the Chinese place the food came from. When the doctor actually explained what happened, she dropped the subject.
* Chris inherited his love of running from problems - when his parents had their absurd case against Greene County used against them, their first reaction was to run to another county.
* When [[Asperchu|Alec]] called the Chandler household posing as [[Game Place]] employee Matthew Nobel, they claimed that taking pictures of somebody without their knowledge or consent was "Not illegal." It is ironic, given that they threatened to sue Mimms and Lucas for exactly the same thing.
* During that same call, Bob seems to completely disregard the concept that an individual can be barred from private property, saying, "it's a business place," as though that has any more bearing on the law and how it affects his son than, say, the color of the store's walls.

==Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws==
[[Image:AL cover.gif|thumb|Where Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws come from.]]
As he believes the police in real life are corrupt and sees them in the same light as he sees the [[jerkop]]s in his comic, Chris has his own spin on the law. The penalties for [[Alcohol|drinking]], [[Tobacky|smoking]] and [[troll|internet harassment]] involve physical violence including a "Kick in the Teeth" which Chris portrays as a punch in [[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008|the only one]] of his supposed series of Q&A videos.

On [[December 2009|New Year's Eve, 2009]], Chris presented a nice babble about a law he wants made to prevent [[Jack Thaddeus]] from using adspace he paid for.

{{quote|I Have The Instinct, and I Have Already [[CWC-ism|Snail-Mailed]] President Barack Obama on how this sort of bad advertisement is going on and how it is Wrong and should be made Illegal. On HOW if the Main Captain does not WANT or IS OFFENDED with the listed Ads within his own Website or Works, REGARDLESS of who controls the AdSpace, WOULD REMOVE THOSE ADS or face JAILTIME. And the F.B.I. would be FULLY INVOLVED in all this, and THEY have the Power, Tools and Balls to seek, hunt down and bring in the Individual Internet Trolls and Ad-Spammers.|Chris, [[Chris and his Ego|Thinking he's important]]}}

Yes, you heard it right. Chris wants to ask the President of the United States to make [[Chris and Reality|advertisements he doesn't like illegal.]] From a practical standpoint, CWCipedia is the only wiki that has a "Main Captain." This "Main Captain" does literally nothing to run or maintain the site at all. Furthermore, if someone paid for adspace, the host that received the money must allow the purchasing party to use said adspace for the allotted time, no matter what they advertise, or the host faces legal penalties. And last but not least, the President has better things to do than slap laws on wikis. It also escapes Chris's mind that the President doesn't make law. He would have had a better chance if he had mailed his congressman. He of course, will never bother.

This attitude is also reflected on his relationship with [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. [[2003|Years ago]], she interrupted Chris in what looked like [[Love Quest#Conflicts with Mary Lee Walsh|soliciting for sex]]. [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Hilarity ensued]] and Chris received a well-deserved [[Autism papers|time-out]] for [[Chris and anger|his antics]]. Fast-forward in [[2009]] when Chris, [[One Blessing, and One Curse|out of the blue]], decides to make peace. He went to her office and left her a [[:File:Apology_to_Mary_Lee.jpg|"Framed Hand-Drawn Apology"]] on her doorsteps. Knowing Chris's attitude, she filled a trespassing notice. In pure stalker logic, Chris said that since he didn't read the letter and returned it to the sender, [[Mailbag 26#Mary Lee Walsh trolls IRL|he's not legally liable]].

[[Mailbag 55#Draconian fun!|Mailbag 55]] posits a few more original laws: one, that it should be illegal for men to ever show their bare chest (because, according to Chris, no one in the entire world ever wants to see a man's bare chest, no matter what shape he's in). He also wants to force all women in any kind of relationship to wear rings, thus defeating all symbolism and significance of them.

Due to Chris being forced away from the Internet, Chris has begun to formulate a new law, the "Bill for Anti Online Bad-Mouthing," starting with his second [[Flipnote Hatena|Flipnote]], [[Don'tGetTrolled!]]. What this entails is unknown, but by the sounds if it, he wishes for a law where no one can ever speak up against anyone in a negative tone, thus allowing Chris to continue to have his e-peen stroked while the trolls can't touch him. While there have been laws that punish those that lead to others being harmed via the Internet, the Bill for Anti Online Bad-Mouthing is one of the ridiculous ideas ever, as it leads to a complete and utter smashing of the Bill of Rights, specifically Freedom of Speech.

TL;DR: Chris ignores the law when it's inconvenient, yet expects it to save the day when the [[Autism]] card doesn't work.

==In the comic==

Chris's understanding of the law in his comics goes so far as to been seen as a mixture of childish tendencies and, some might say, authoritarianism. In [[CWCville]], Chris has banned a number of things in his city. Smoking or drinking alcohol would lead one to be either sentenced to ten years in prison or a much more lenient US$1,500 fine (although, as CWCville uses C-Quarters and W-Quarters for currency, it's not clear why fines are levied in US dollars).<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> However, it should be noted that Chris [[Rollin' and Trollin'|repealed the law]] in [[June 2009]].

Even stranger is the the fact that the city tends to lack other races or even other sub-cultures, beyond Chris, the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]], a handful of (white) males and females, and the few Transformers in his town. This lack of diversity leads many to think that Chris has banned them as well. The Rosechus tend to fight for [[women's rights]], that is to say, the ability to strip naked whenever and wherever they want to, not to mention the fact that full legal rights for women are already established across the US, suggesting that Chris has imposed discriminating laws against women in CWCville.

Chris has been seen as a do-nothing Mayor, preferring to have [[Allison Amber|his secretary]] do all the work (as per his thoughts on women) while he goes off on another one of his sweetheart searches. He has mandated "[[Dating Education]]" classes for students so that they can learn to go on dates, as well as how to "stay straight."

[[List_of_Sonichu_characters#Constables_Gerald_Grant_and_Louis_Perez|Actual police officers]] did not appear until [[Sonichu 10|quite late]] and even then, they did nothing whatever, giving the impression that Chris and his Pokémon abominations are the only thing standing in between peace and eternal virgins with rage. However, [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] seems to reveal that there are three sets of "other" protectors: a (possibly) nondescript police force (distinct from [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s [[jerkops]]), as well as his own team of [[Power Rangers]] and a team of [[Transformers]].

{{quote|Is CWCville under Martial Law? |[[Jack Thaddeus]] citing the truth as he sees it}}

It gets even scarier. In a conversation that [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|Chris had with Jack Thaddeus]], he reveals that CWCville is the home of a paramilitary force equipped with tanks which he uses as a "Police Force", and all his Electric Hedgehog Pokémon enjoy immunity from prosecution and are above the law. If we add all this to the fact that there are no free elections in CWCville, this shows us the city in the hands of a dictator running it with an iron fist, and backed with super-powered goons who are free to do any atrocity with impunity. According to Chris, Magi-Chan mentally scans the city perimeters for any sexual acts, and reports any homosexual activity to the authorities. The participants are then [[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|"tried and fined HEAVILY; $500 or 50 Hours of Community Service"]]. Apparently in CWCville, the [[Wikipedia:Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution]] does not apply in matters of personal sexual choice. This might put him at odds with [[Chris and sex#Pedophilia|his own sexual ideals...]]

In a strange [[Chris and hypocrisy|set of double standards]], Chris has been shown to injure, kill, or damage people and property ''outside of CWCVille''. [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] has shown no less than three grievous acts upon others: the destruction of the 4-cent_garbage building, the murder of over one hundred alleged "trolls" in said destruction, breaking and entering, and destroying Internet files and property.

Following the death of [[Simonla]], the culprits (Alec, Mao, Sean and Evan) are subjected to a show trial, and given no defense attorney by the state (violating the [[Wikipedia:Sixth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Sixth Amendment]]) forcing Sean to act as their lawyer despite being high as a kite. There is no solid evidence presented for the murder charge, aside from the Voltorb remote (which the prosecutor never tried to prove belonged to them) and wholly unreliable "psychic evidence" extracted by Magi-Chan. When they're railroaded and found guilty, they're ''killed by the people they've wronged'' (read: murdered brutally by cartoon characters), in a gross violation of the [[Wikipedia:Eighth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Eighth Amendment]] forbidding cruel and unusual punishment.

Demonstrating Chris's limited understanding of trials (as his knowledge of trials stems purely from television), the kangaroo court integrates both elements of civil and criminal trials. The Asperpedia Four are not only prosecuted for murder by a [[Marvey Blaziken|state attorney]], as per a criminal trial, but also charged with defamation of character, libel, and copyright infringement (as well as several charges such as "profanity to the max" that would hold no water in an actual court) by Chris and his cohorts, as per a civil trial. Surely enough, Chris, Sonichu, and Rosechu are sitting in a bench marked "PLAINTIF" [''sic'']. That both civil and criminal charges are included in one trial not only demonstrates a poor understanding of the courtroom process, but is further proof that Chris considers "slanderous mockeries" and other torts on par with major crimes such as murder and assault. To add to the equation, one cannot be given a death sentence (or any sentence, for that matter) for being guilty in a civil trial, but in the Asperpedia Four trial civil charges are the primary reason for the death sentence. In summary, the CWCville court system is a constitutional nightmare that violates multiple articles and amendments, and has no concept of due process. One must wonder why it is allowed to exist within the borders of the United States.

tl;dr: Any semblance of law in CWCville exists solely to further the wishes of its tyrannical (and murderous) Mayor.

==See also==
*[[Parody]]
*[[Jerkop]]
*[[Manajerk]]

==Sauces==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

Medallions

2010-09-11T16:47:45Z

Jeremyorkin:

[[Image:License.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Oh yes he fucking did]]
[[Image:ickeriss_medallions.jpg|150px|thumb|Top to bottom: [[PS3|The Good]], [[Hex Bawx|the Bad]], [[Chris and art|the Ugly]]. Left to right: The decoy Sonichu medallion, the [[Jiggliami]] medallion, the Rosechu medallion, and the [[Blake]] medallion]]

{{quote|Watch out for the medallion!|[[Niggo|Ludacris]]}}

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] loves his original character [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] so much that he wears a hand-made '''Sonichu medallion''' on his neck. In public. The Sonichu medallion, along with his trademark [[Chris and fashion|Ernie shirt]], is perhaps his most famous characteristic. Over the years, Chris has produced numerous medallions of his [[electric hedgehog]] characters. He also calls them "medals". (even though they're made from [[CHRIS!!!_CHANDLER!!!|Crayola Fucking model magic!!!]]

==Origins and purpose==

[[Image:096-SonichuMedallion.jpg|150px|thumb|Like anything else Chris holds dear, it also comes in card form]]
[[Image:0608-CWCIs22.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The earliest known photo of Chris with the medallion, from 24 Feb 2004, Chris's 22nd birthday. The medallion is in profile, with [[Wikipedia:Shrinky Dinks|Shrinky Dinks]] hanging from its chain]]

Though Chris previously could not recall when he first made the Medallion, in [[August 2009]], Chris finally recalled the origins of the Medallion. From [[CWCipedia]]:<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu#Conception_and_Creation http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu#Conception_and_Creation]</ref>

{{quote|Then Late [[2000]], I bought some Crayola Model Magic Clay, and I molded and crafted the First Original Sonichu Medallion that I wore around my neck with a makeshift chain (which I later replaced with a better necklace I bought from [[Anna|Pacific Sunwear]] at my Mall). Sadly, the First Original was mistrusted with a [[Blanca Weiss|feindish[sic] individual]] in [[2008]], I recrafted the Medal and continued on (The Necklace Still Holds ALL the History of the Medallions). THERE IS CURRENTLY ONLY ONE Original, True Sonichu Medallion, and it is NOT MADE FROM [[CChanSonichuCWC|PAPER]] cheaply, NOT MANUFACTURED IN A FACTORY from Plastic or Metal (yet); IT IS MADE FROM CRAYOLA MODLE[sic] MAGIC CLAY, with my Permanent Ink Signature, Copyright Note, Circle of Originality, and Two Custom Shrinkie[sic]-Dink Charms of Sonichu and an S-Chu Ball. }}

[[Image:Aragorn.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Throughout the ages, many have been tempted by the allure of the Medallion, with its power of giving its possessor delusions of grandeur, being Internet famous, and [[fail]] art skills, not to mention [[Anchuent Prophecy|the power]] to turn the user [[Wes-Li Sonichu|into]] [[Saramah Rosechu|a]] [[Chris-chan Sonichu|furry]]]]

Despite being allegedly created in March 2000, the earliest known photograph of Chris wearing a Sonichu medallion is from his 22nd birthday, on 24 [[February 2004]]. In his [[So Need a Cute Girl]] video (20 December 2004) he feels it necessary to explain what it is, suggesting that it is still a relatively new feature.

In a [[Mumble 6|Mumble chat]] on 10 [[February 2009]], Chris revealed the reason for the medallion and that is...because he wanted to. It's "like a nametag" for him. In one of his [[ED]] edits, Chris says that his medallion "identifies him for the [[autism|high-funcioning[sic] Autistic]] individual that he is".<ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=1997315096&oldid=1997314465 Chris ED edit, Revision as of 07:28, 10 November 2007</ref> And man, it sure does. It has also been speculated there could be other reasons for wearing his medallion, which range from simply thinking Sonichu is '''SERIOUS BUSINESS''', to being a portable anchor in our dangerous real world to [[Cwcville]], his own happy world where he's always the hero who saves the day.

[[File:Soniccomicmedallion.png|thumb|Chris can't come up with any original ideas.]] One recent theory as to the origin of the medallion idea comes from the ''Sonic the Hedgehog'' comic series (Issue #70) in which a character is depicted wearing a Sonic medallion. This theory is supported by the fact the issue came out in February 1999, one year before Chris claims the Sonichu medallion was created.

Each medallion is constructed from Crayola Model Magic, a non-toxic, easy-to-use modeling clay intended for small children. Chris wedges a keyring into the edge of each medallion, from which he can attach a chain to go around his neck. Sometimes he wears a Wilson wristband on top of it because, being autistic, he mostly likely has [[Wikipedia:Sensory_defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], which might render the sensation of the chain's links unbearable. Medallions are painted with acrylic paint in the color schemes of the characters they represent, with [[Chris and copyright|copyright information]] scrawled on the back. Additional detailing varies, but Chris is known to have applied Shrinky-Dink charms to certain medallions as a form of authentication, to prevent counterfeiting.

==The Sonichu Medallion==

[[Image:0712-CWCCollGrad3.jpg|150px|thumb|Chris even wore it at his god damn [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] graduation]]
[[Image:FushionRedone.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Before Blanca, it was believed that the Medallion of Fail would corrupt its possessor, turning him into an autistic manchild with a poor taste in [[Chris and fashion|fashion]]]]

Chris's primary medal is his Sonichu medallion, which he has rarely been seen without for the past five years. This medallion of course depicts his main character, Sonichu. Within the canon of Chris's [[Sonichu comics]], the medallion is the source of the [[anchuent powers]] that allow Chris to assume his electric hedgehog alter ego, [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]].

As he explained to [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] in his [[The Sonichu Chronicles|business proposal]], the medallion gives him no special powers in real life.

In several videos, Chris says that in order for it to be a TRUE and HONEST video, it will be of him wearing the medallion. In this manner he attempted to cast doubt on the videos he posted confessing homosexuality, since he was not wearing his medallion in that footage.

Since the discovery of Chris on [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], it had been understood among trolls that the Sonichu medallion was Chris's most cherished possession and that he would cry like a bitch if it were ever taken from him, making its capture a prime objective. This proved only partially true. Chris does not seem to have a special attachment to any one particular medallion, but merely his ability to always wear one at all times. Further, all successful efforts to eliminate the medallions have resulted in relatively little outrage; Chris is always more concerned with his internet girlfriends being fake than he is over losing his property because of them.

 

===Prototype===
{{quote|He was also wearing a makeshift necklace that has a large plastic medallion in the shape of a Pokeman [sic] characters [sic] head. He also had a number of shrinky dink decorations attached to this necklace.|Psychiatrist describing the prototype Medallion of Fail, [[Autism papers]]<ref>[[Autism_papers#MENTAL_STATUS_EXAM:]]</ref>}}

[[Image:094-SchuMedl.jpg|150px|thumb|Earliest known version of the medallion.]]
[[Image:190-chumedal.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Computer rendering. This required over 9000 hours in MS Paint, as well as an associates degree in CAD/CAM.]]
It appears that the very first medallion Chris created is the one seen to the right, which Chris was photographed wearing sporadically in 2004. This design is definitely cruder than the others, with a pale yellow hue suggesting Chris was still learning how to properly apply color in this medium. This version is always seen on a metal chain, accompanied by Shrinky Dinks of a "CWC" logo, Sonichu, Rosechu, and the [[Chaotic Combo]].

Chris wore this medallion as late as May 2004, when he brought it with him to the Anime Mid-Atlantic convention that year. He would also wear this medallion later in the year, when he received a [[Autism papers#Intake Survey|psychiatric survey]].

 

===Mark 1 (and decoy)===
[[Image:Chrischan_sonichu_medal.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Spoiler: he even wears it during his sex fantasies]]
[[Image:Decoy medallion.JPG|thumb|150px|The decoy medallion]]

[[Image:SpecialSymbols.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The SPECIAL SYMBOLS to identify the TRUE and HONEST medallion.]]
[[Image:Terrifying by neodalion.jpg|150px|thumb|Chris's supposed reaction to the destruction of his medallion (artist's depiction).]]

By [[June 2005]] Chris had begun to wear a new medallion with a better paint job. This one can be identified by the tufts of fur on the sides of Sonichu's face, which are less pronounced than in the prototype and later models. There are no Shrinky Dinks to go with it, and instead of a chain it hangs from some sort of beaded necklace. The appearance of this version in pictures and videos seems to correspond with the introduction of Chris's red-and-blue striped shirts. This may be the medallion he was wearing in the [[So Need a Cute Girl|20 Dec 2004 video]]. It is definitely the medallion he wore to the 2005 Anime Mid-Atlantic convention.

No one is sure how many medallions Chris wore between 2005 and [[2008]], but in all pictures they appear roughly the same as this design. Sonichu's face has eyebrows in some photos and not in others, so either Chris was repainting the same medallion or making new ones. 4chan and ED are filled with high-functioning autistics who have pored over photographs identifying subtle differences in the medal's "ears" and "cheeks," without arriving at a consensus. For the sake of clarity, this article will assume that this was Chris's only medallion during this period.

In [[August 2008]] an anon on /v/ offered a story and photograph suggesting that he had met Chris in real life and tricked him into giving the medallion to him. However, Anon aspies all immediately analyzed the details of dozens of pictures and determined the "stolen" medallion to be a forgery. This conclusion was reaffirmed when Chris himself decided to post [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|a video]] announcing that the medallion had never been stolen, defiantly claiming that nobody would take it from him. He further denied it in the [[Christian Weston Chandler Interview]].

Chris claimed to have made multiple Sonichu medallions and that he would sometimes wear these decoys to frustrate attempts to steal the one true medallion. It would remain unclear whether he was bluffing until October 2008 when the team of trolls posing as [[Blanca Weiss]] tricked him into sending all of his medallions to them. The package they received contained no fewer than ''two'' yellow Sonichu medals: one with the special markings identifying it as the "real" one, and another with no markings. It may be assumed that these were the only two medallions he owned at that time. Neither of them was the prototype, however, and its fate is unclear.

A video that showed the destruction of the medallion was eventually uploaded to YouTube. Chris responded by [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|crashing into slumber]]. Its remains are currently locked in a box somewhere at Miskatonic University. As for the decoy Sonichu medallion, it ultimately ended up in the possession of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]'s owner/webmaster, Girlvynl.

<center>{{#ev:youtube|O-TP2wCucZo}}</center>

 

===Mark 2===
[[Image:ChrisMomsPanties.jpg|150px|thumb|It identifies him for the high-functioning autistic individual that he is]]

After sending the medallions to Blanca, and being told by Blanca that trolls had stolen them from "her," Chris created a new Sonichu medallion with a slightly larger design. He posted [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|a video]] [[lie|explaining]] that Blanca had recovered the original one and sent it back to him, and that he had modified it. This new medallion boasted a special peg on the reverse side which could be used to hold Chris's [[high school ring]], which somehow made it copy-protected.

Assuming Chris did not create any backup medallions, this is the same one he wore while posing in his mother's underwear at the request of trolls posing as Blanca. During this same exchange he later [[semen|ejaculated]] onto the medal. Shortly thereafter Chris posted [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 21st, 2008|a new video]] in which he is visibly not wearing the medallion. It's unclear if he replaced this soiled medallion or if he cleaned it; in either case he was wearing it (or a similar duplicate) again by 27 October.

On 3 March 2009 [[Max]] coerced Chris into cutting his medallion into pieces and shoving those pieces up his rectum. The idea of Chris literally inserting these chunks of ceramic into his rectum (and therefore risking anal tearing and sepsis) was highly controversial. Some have argued that he merely placed them between his buttcheeks (either in an attempt to deceive Max or out of ignorance of how to get them past his sphincter), but in any case, the remnants of the medallion were assuredly covered in [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|fecal matter]]. Whatever happened, Chris thinks that his father would "have another heart attack" if he knew the details.

===Mark 3===
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|150px|thumb|Oh God, the taste...]]
[[Image:New sonichu medallion.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The first formal appearance of the Mark 3 medallion. It's like ''the Blair Witch Project,'' but only a few seconds long and the entire budget (and then some) spent on the crap on the background]]

Although Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|claimed]] that he was making a new medallion, he didn't wear any medal in his [[YouTube]] videos between the 3 March 2009 incident and his 1 July 2009 videos. During this period he argued that his high school ring may be accepted as a symbol of his truthiness. However, since this statement was made without the medallion, this was false and Chris disproved himself.

In photos released 17 April 2009 of Chris in some [[butt garments]], the new medallion, Mark 3, is shown as Chris licks it in a sensuous fashion. The release of these images proved doubly hurtful for Chris, not only for showing him, a shell of a manchild, in diapers but even worse in that it confirmed that there is a new Medallion that can either be seized and/or shoved up his rectum.

Despite the fact that he had made a new medallion, Chris was for some time reluctant to wear it in his videos, allegedly out of the fear that trolls would start a new campaign to seize the medallion and/or shove it up his rectum.

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009|22 May 2009]] this medallion made a surprise cameo in Christian's newest video. During the update, the video randomly cuts to the medallion hanging from the ceiling, only to cut back to Chris seconds afterward, presumably to add extra validity to the statements made in Chris's video.

The [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009|1 July 2009]] videos mark the full return of the Medallion of Fail, as Chris wears the third medallion around his neck throughout both videos.

CWC enthusiasts can look forward to Chris voluntarily surrendering the medallion to thieves and/or willingly shoving it up his rectum in the near future.

 

==The Rosechu Medallion==
[[Image:Medallion Rosechu.jpg|150px|thumb|left|A gift for his beloved sister-wife]]
[[Image:Rosechu medallion.JPG|150px|thumb|Close-up]]

Only one medallion of Sonichu's [[sweetheart]] [[Rosechu]] is known to have existed, but it is speculated to be the first one Chris fashioned after the Sonichu one. The Rosechu medallion was intended to be worn by Chris's future [[heartsweet]], the one who would be his true love and bear him his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|God-called daughter]]. Chris has never been seen wearing it himself. It was sent with the others to Blanca in October 2008. It currently resides with the founder of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]].

The medallion was first known to the internet in the pages of [[Sonichu 4]], where Chris's [[Crystal Weston Chandler (character)|imaginary twin sister Crystal]] was introduced wearing it. In the comics Crystal possesses the same anchuent powers as Chris and the Rosechu medallion therefore allows her to become Crystalina Rosechu. That a real Rosechu medal existed was not learned until later, when Chris revealed it to [[PandaHalo]].

In case it hadn't occurred to you yet: Chris did, in real life, make a medal to be awarded to the future mother of his children, and in his fantasy world he has affixed this same medal to the twin sister he created to explore what he would be like if he'd been born female. Freud would doubtlessly have some choice words to say about this.

 

==The Black Sonichu Medallion==
[[Image:Blachu Medallion.JPG|150px|thumb|left|He's too angry to show his [[fangs]]]]
[[Image:Black sonichu.JPG|150px|thumb|Close-up]]

Although Black Sonichu (now [[Blake]]) seems to have originally served as an analogue for [[Wes Iseli]],<ref>As seen in [[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]] - [[:File:433-CWCSNHP9.jpg]]</ref> Chris appears to use the Black Sonichu medallion to represent his own dark side. The picture at the left speaks volumes about its significance; Chris seems to believe that if he scowls hard enough and wears the evil medallion, then whoever he's angry with will be terrified into capitulation, such as when he wore it in a video aimed at [[Adam Stackhouse]].

The [[Anchuent Prophecy]] in the comics foretells that the Black Sonichu medallion would be created as a dark reflection of the original, yellow Sonichu medallion Chris wears. Beginning with [[Sonichu 6]], [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]] began wearing the dark medal and acting as Christian's evil twin, following the urges Chris himself keeps bottled up inside him. Like Christian, Naitsirhc summons powers from his medallion to become Reldnahc Ha-Taque.

Naitsirhc's medallion notwithstanding, Black Sonichu's role as the symbol of pure evil has softened in recent years as Chris has allowed the character to soften and fall in love with [[Bubbles Rosechu]]. As such the actual Black Sonichu medallion was rarely seen until it was sent to Blanca in October 2008.
{{Clear}}

==The Jiggliami Medallion==
[[Image:Jiggliamimedallion.jpg|150px|thumb|On the back, it reads "Medallion crafted by Christian Weston Chandler."]]

Despite the purpose of the Rosechu medallion, Chris was so in love with Blanca that he created a brand-new medallion for her to wear based on Blanca's original character [[Jiggliami]]. This medallion was sent along with the others to Blanca in October 2008. Blanca was depicted wearing this medallion in [[Sonichu 7]] and [[Sonichu 8|8]]. It is currently locked away in a Government warehouse somewhere in California.

It is the simplest of the medallions, being a plain circle with no three-dimensional pieces. Consequently, it's probably the least hideous of the medallions, as Chris has limited the number of ways he can fail by giving himself less work to do.

==The [[Asperchu]] Medallion (A.K.A. The Medallion of Win?)==
[[Image:Asperchumedal.jpg|200px|thumb|left|The Medallion of Win in all its glory]]

In [[Magical Man Potion|one video]], Chris's mysterious friend is seen sporting an odd medallion. In [[02 March 2010|another video]] a few days later, the medallion is confirmed to be one of Asperchu. Apparently, it was crafted by Alec Benson Leary and given to Chris as a symbol of goodwill. In that video, Chris is pained to have the medallion around and have it hung up on his wall.

==Gone forever?==
As can be seen in his recent videos in [[2010]], Chris is no longer wearing his medallions. The last time the medallion was seen was when he said he was leaving the internet for the second time. Also gone are the clown shirts. Disposing of these elements may be Christian attempting to be perceived as a normal person. The medallion made a return on September 6th, as Chris is seen wearing it once again in [[Haters gonna hate.mov]]. All is right with the world again.
{{clear}}

==See also==
*[[Amnyfest Ring]], which Chris claims as the source of his power after losing his medallions. Still resides with Chris for the time being.

==Sauces==
<references/>

{{Relics of Fail}}

[[Category:Relics of Fail]]
[[Category:Things Chris has had Sex with]]

Belt Buckle of Fail

2010-09-11T16:37:48Z

Jeremyorkin:

[[Image:203-SchuRchuLove.jpg|thumb|right|Closeup]]
[[Image:Nicebelt.jpg|left|thumb|Uhhh....]]
The '''Belt Buckle of Fail''' is a minor [[Relics of Fail|Relic of Fail]]. As the name suggests, it's a belt buckle of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] pulling [[Rosechu]] along behind him, overlaying a [[homo|pink]] heart in the background. Yes, really.
It is unclear on why Chris wears this belt buckle, and even more unclear on how he received the peice of crap. It's likely to be a laminated peice of paper tied to a normal belt buckle with some twine. Being the lazy shit he is, he probably had it made for him into a button and had it put over the buckle.

It's infinately unclear as to why he chose the color pink for a background. This is hypocracy on his part because of his [[homo|homophobia]], and another reason why he's such an obsessive moron. It's merely another peice of sonichu paraphinalia, except you'd have to be a sick bastard to look at anything within a foot of his [[duck]], which is why it is not as flaunted, and publicised as the [[Medallions of Fail|sonichu medalion]].
{{clear}}
{{stub}}
==See Also==
*[[Medallions of Fail]]
[[homo]]
{{Relics of Fail}}

[[Category:Relics of Fail]]

4 September 2009

2010-09-11T15:54:53Z

Jeremyorkin:

"'''4 September 2009'''" (officially "'''09042009'''") is a video that was made after [[Vivian]] sent a gift to [[Bob]] for his birthday. [[Ego|Mistaking]] the gift as an attempt to get on his good side; [[Chris]], ever the gentleman, thanks the kind lady by showing his displeasure at Vivian wanting to put the [[audiobooks]] on DVD and sell them, demanding that she remove all the videos and shut down her account before she can regain his respect again, after throwing a [[clown doll]] at his camera yet another 2-3 times. Vivians audio books are to only way some people can read [[sonichu]] on the grounds that some people are more sensitive to bad stories than others, and it may be [[roach|tramautic]] to them.

Even though vivina never dressed up in a pickle suit, and send hookers to his house, or trick him into destroying his [[ps3]], he still views vivian in the same negative light as [[clyde]].

==Video==

{{quote|Vivian, if you REALLY want to Earn My Trust, you DELETE ALL YOUR VIDEOS, then Close Your YouTube Account, and NEVER REUPLOAD THOSE VIDEOS EVER AGAIN!}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = 4 September 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|BoShspztoqs}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 4 September 2009
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = {{Rage|text}}
| Shirt = {{BlueThinStriped|text}}
| previous = [[30_August_2009| 30 August 2009]]
| next = [[Sign_Destruction_Video| Sign Destruction Video]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===

[[Captain's Log]]. Stardate: [[September 2009|September 4th, 2009]].

Uh, couple-of, uh- yeah, couple of issues. Firstly I wish to, uh... [''removes his [[glasses]]''] extend my [[father]]'s gratitude for the present. Apparently you ordered for him... and uh, delivered to us Miss [[Vivian]], so [''mumbles''] thank you for that.

Still, it does not excuse you for what you have done to me, you have s-made a mockery out of me. You ma- you behind my back made the stupid [[audiobooks]], and you ar-and you ar-and you are a troll- other [[trolls]] matter of a fact, hey- [''Chris grabs the [[Clown Doll]]''] -remember this clown? [[Clyde Cash]]! Clyde Cash is Vivian's cousin or was since the bastard is dead. And we-and we all know what he did to me. That son of a bitch. But anyway, Vivian is just about as deep as he is because she's- she is no different- 'cos she among those trolls slandered and mocked my good name. Especially in what in her videos that she did against me. [''[[sigh]]s''] So you know what? Equivalent to Clyde Fash, equivalent to Vivian Gee.

[''Holds up clown doll and launches it at [[PSEye]]'']

[''Jump cut'']

Anyway, look Vivian, if you really want to get back on my good side, you'll close your [[YouTube]] account, make sh- and make sure all videos are deleted, and ''never, ever, ever'' upload them or make any money off of them ''ever again''! If you really want to earn back my trust, you'll close your YouTube account after deleting every-last-one-of-your-videos! Delete all your videos. Close your YouTube, then maybe I will let you [''exhales''] be back in my good graces. And I will unblock your e-mail address from my AOL. [''sighs''] [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction|Still curse you]]. Because you have done- you have- between you and Clyde Cash, you both have done so much bad against me.

[''Grunts, grabs clown doll, and throws it at PSEye again'']

[''Jump cut'']

Anyway, also, sh-s-stop sending us the dang catalogs and junk. We are shipping up them right back, we are makers-make sure they get sent to [[Wikipedia:Dead letter office|dead letter office]] if they cannot be sent back. So you trolls may as well just stop it! And you can stop the incoming calls because I'm just going to ignore you and delete your voice mails. [''Talks in a high pitch''] "[[White knight e-mails|I have information!]] [''Begins touching his right manboob''] I think you are sexy! I know you're trolls just by talking like that. So just may as well just shut the fuck up! And for the rest of everybody who is [[honest]], true and good; [''makes a V sign''] peace and have a good day.

==See also==
*[[Sign Destruction Video‎]]
*[[Death threats]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[30 August 2009]]|nextlink=[[Sign Destruction Video]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}
{{Troll Videos}}

B-Manajerk

2010-09-11T15:40:21Z

Jeremyorkin:

'''B-Manajerk''' is a villain featured in [[Sonichu 3|Sonichu #3]] and [[Sonichu 4|4]]. He is one of the few villains [[Chris]] has managed to defeat single-handedly.

==B-Manajerk in Real Life==

Little is known about the B-Manajerk, including his real name. What little information is available comes to us from Chris's records of their first two encounters.

[[Image:B-Manajerk.jpg|thumb|200px|right|Based on a True Story]]
''<blockquote>"June 22, 2005: Let me begin this entry with what happened two days ago. I had my setup at the [[McDonald's]] at [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]], and apparently complaints were made. The two [[Manajerks|manajerkss]], a [[Merried Seinor Comic|Seinor Comic]], and a [[Black]], Fat Jerk (he looked a lot like the leader of the [[Jerkops]] at the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|Mall]], whom I refer to now as the [[Jerkhief]]) approached me and took me for a fall with my trying to find a [[Boyfriend-Free Girl]], like I have been doing for the past [[Love quest|over one-year and ten-months]]. We argued and disputed, until the two of them left to call the police. While they were gone, I had taken off the [[Attraction Sign|sign]] from my Nintendo DS and hidden it on the back cover of my diary. When the Jerkops came, they were all like “What seems to be the problem?” And the Merried Seinor Comic was like, “Where’s the Sign?” And I was, “What sign?” And another argument was had between the four of us, in which I NEVER gave any of those JERKS Eye-Contact, because none of them deserved it!. So, I got kicked out from the McDonald’s, not the Wal-Mart, for the rest of the day. Now for what happened today, I was starting to setup my things, and the B-Manajerk was getting in my face (I feel that he really hates me), and he was like, “Don’t set up your stuff. Don’t push me.” I was not going to use the Nintendo DS sign today, anyway. But he did not want my [[Pixelblocks|Pixelblock]] sculptors at all. I stood up against that Manajerk; I continued to build, and I dictated my situation into his face (with a song and dance). He went up to the [[W-M-Manajerk|Wal-Mart Manajerk]], and he was like, “Hey, Let’s talk.” But I sat silent for a minute, then I said to him, “I do not speek to any Man other than myself, because they all have taken all the pretty girls leaving me with none.” [[Virgin with rage|Verbal Combat]] had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Has]].” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off." --Christian Weston Chandler</blockquote>''

Presumably, B-Manajerk was the manager of the McDonald's in the Wal-Mart, or a subordinate to the man Chris identifies only as a "Merried Seinor Comic." One way or another, Chris was kicked out of the McDonald's, but felt that he was still entitled to loiter in the rest of the Wal-Mart and play with Pixelblocks. Since this was outside of the B-Manajerk's jurisdiction, he called in the manager of the Wal-Mart to deal with him, at which point Chris ran off like a little bitch, which Chris seems to consider a brilliant tactical victory.

From Chris's account, we can infer that the B-Manajerk was most likely a very sensible, though possibly overweight, African-American male, who takes pride in his business and doesn't want smelly weirdos sitting around his restaurant playing with toys and begging for pussy.

It is possible that the "B" in "B-Manajerk" stands for "black". Since no fewer than three managers interfered with his agenda that day, he most likely used these appellations to tell them apart in his story. Otherwise, we're left to conclude that "B" somehow stands for "McDonald's", which isn't entirely beyond the realm of possibility for Chris. In the Sonichu Audiobooks, Chris refers to B-Manajerk as "Black Manajerk", so the B must stand for "black".

Clearly upset by the events of June 20-22, [[2005]], Chris took revenge in the only way he could: by turning these men into fictional supervillains he could defeat in his fantasy life.

==McAttack==

[[Image:Bmanajerk-oblivion.PNG|thumb|150px|left|Video Game B-Manajerk]][[Image:B-manajerk_real.jpg|thumb|300px|right|Artist's rendition of what the B-Manajerk may have actually looked like, based on Chris's descriptions]]

The B-Manajerk first appeared in Sub-Episode 4, which was featured in ''Sonichu'' #3 and reused in ''Sonichu'' #4. In this embellished version of the real-life encounter, Chris sits peacefully at the McDonald's, which he terms "M-C-D-Ville" in the "Mal-Wart Region", until the B-Manajerk and the Merried Seinor Comic confront him preemptively. While the Merried Seinor Comic has cybernetic arms and legs, the B-Manajerk is arrayed in golden armor, vaguely reminiscent of Goldar from "Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers". He wears glasses and has a round head, looking a great deal like the Jerkhief, as Chris describes in his journal entry. B-Manajerk explains that the Jerkhief warned them about Chris, and since having a mate of any kind is a violation of Mal-Wart law, they plan to "intercept" him, using [[Mecha-Jerkops]] on loan from the Jerkhief.

Though outnumbered, Chris stands his ground, and [[Darkbind Sonichu]] comes to his aid, destroying the Mecha-Jerkops and defeating the Merried Seinor Comic so that Chris can battle the B-Manajerk one-on-one. He transforms into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], and the "anime wings" he had been wearing on his head transform into working wings, similar to the power-up from Super Mario 64. The B-Manajerk uses rocket boosters mounted to his back to confront Chris-Chan in an aerial duel, but Chris uses several techniques to confuse and misdirect him, including a decoy made of Pixelblocks. After defeating the B-Manajerk, Chris lectured both of his enemies on the importance of his Love Quest and the absolute necessity of his Attraction Sign.

The B-Manajerk would briefly return in the pages of [[Sonichu 7]], when he and his fellow Manajerks attended the council of villains at PVCC, where [[Mary Lee Walsh]] announced Chris's disappearance into the time void.

==Powers==

In addition to his flight-enabling armor, the B-Manajerk is armed with a pair of large guns, and a golden battle axe.

==Weaknesses==

Pixelblocks,
Sky uppercuts,and [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
==See also==
*[[Manajerks]]
*[[Niggos]]

[[Category:Manajerks]]
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]
[[Category:Villains]]

B-Manajerk

2010-09-11T15:39:05Z

Jeremyorkin:

'''B-Manajerk''' is a villain featured in [[Sonichu 3|Sonichu #3]] and [[Sonichu 4|4]]. He is one of the few villains [[Chris]] has managed to defeat single-handedly.

==B-Manajerk in Real Life==

Little is known about the B-Manajerk, including his real name. What little information is available comes to us from Chris's records of their first two encounters.

[[Image:B-Manajerk.jpg|thumb|200px|right|Based on a True Story]]
''<blockquote>"June 22, 2005: Let me begin this entry with what happened two days ago. I had my setup at the [[McDonald's]] at [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]], and apparently complaints were made. The two [[Manajerks|manajerkss]], a [[Merried Seinor Comic|Seinor Comic]], and a [[Black]], Fat Jerk (he looked a lot like the leader of the [[Jerkops]] at the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|Mall]], whom I refer to now as the [[Jerkhief]]) approached me and took me for a fall with my trying to find a [[Boyfriend-Free Girl]], like I have been doing for the past [[Love quest|over one-year and ten-months]]. We argued and disputed, until the two of them left to call the police. While they were gone, I had taken off the [[Attraction Sign|sign]] from my Nintendo DS and hidden it on the back cover of my diary. When the Jerkops came, they were all like “What seems to be the problem?” And the Merried Seinor Comic was like, “Where’s the Sign?” And I was, “What sign?” And another argument was had between the four of us, in which I NEVER gave any of those JERKS Eye-Contact, because none of them deserved it!. So, I got kicked out from the McDonald’s, not the Wal-Mart, for the rest of the day. Now for what happened today, I was starting to setup my things, and the B-Manajerk was getting in my face (I feel that he really hates me), and he was like, “Don’t set up your stuff. Don’t push me.” I was not going to use the Nintendo DS sign today, anyway. But he did not want my [[Pixelblocks|Pixelblock]] sculptors at all. I stood up against that Manajerk; I continued to build, and I dictated my situation into his face (with a song and dance). He went up to the [[W-M-Manajerk|Wal-Mart Manajerk]], and he was like, “Hey, Let’s talk.” But I sat silent for a minute, then I said to him, “I do not speek to any Man other than myself, because they all have taken all the pretty girls leaving me with none.” [[Virgin with rage|Verbal Combat]] had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Has]].” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off." --Christian Weston Chandler</blockquote>''

Presumably, B-Manajerk was the manager of the McDonald's in the Wal-Mart, or a subordinate to the man Chris identifies only as a "Merried Seinor Comic." One way or another, Chris was kicked out of the McDonald's, but felt that he was still entitled to loiter in the rest of the Wal-Mart and play with Pixelblocks. Since this was outside of the B-Manajerk's jurisdiction, he called in the manager of the Wal-Mart to deal with him, at which point Chris ran off like a little bitch, which Chris seems to consider a brilliant tactical victory.

From Chris's account, we can infer that the B-Manajerk was most likely a very sensible, though possibly overweight, African-American male, who takes pride in his business and doesn't want smelly weirdos sitting around his restaurant playing with toys and begging for pussy.

It is possible that the "B" in "B-Manajerk" stands for "black". Since no fewer than three managers interfered with his agenda that day, he most likely used these appellations to tell them apart in his story. Otherwise, we're left to conclude that "B" somehow stands for "McDonald's", which isn't entirely beyond the realm of possibility for Chris. In the Sonichu Audiobooks, Chris refers to B-Manajerk as "Black Manajerk", so the B must stand for "black".

Clearly upset by the events of June 20-22, [[2005]], Chris took revenge in the only way he could: by turning these men into fictional supervillains he could defeat in his fantasy life.

==McAttack==

[[Image:Bmanajerk-oblivion.PNG|thumb|150px|left|Video Game B-Manajerk]][[Image:B-manajerk_real.jpg|thumb|300px|right|Artist's rendition of what the B-Manajerk may have actually looked like, based on Chris's descriptions]]

The B-Manajerk first appeared in Sub-Episode 4, which was featured in ''Sonichu'' #3 and reused in ''Sonichu'' #4. In this embellished version of the real-life encounter, Chris sits peacefully at the McDonald's, which he terms "M-C-D-Ville" in the "Mal-Wart Region", until the B-Manajerk and the Merried Seinor Comic confront him preemptively. While the Merried Seinor Comic has cybernetic arms and legs, the B-Manajerk is arrayed in golden armor, vaguely reminiscent of Goldar from "Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers". He wears glasses and has a round head, looking a great deal like the Jerkhief, as Chris describes in his journal entry. B-Manajerk explains that the Jerkhief warned them about Chris, and since having a mate of any kind is a violation of Mal-Wart law, they plan to "intercept" him, using [[Mecha-Jerkops]] on loan from the Jerkhief.

Though outnumbered, Chris stands his ground, and [[Darkbind Sonichu]] comes to his aid, destroying the Mecha-Jerkops and defeating the Merried Seinor Comic so that Chris can battle the B-Manajerk one-on-one. He transforms into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], and the "anime wings" he had been wearing on his head transform into working wings, similar to the power-up from Super Mario 64. The B-Manajerk uses rocket boosters mounted to his back to confront Chris-Chan in an aerial duel, but Chris uses several techniques to confuse and misdirect him, including a decoy made of Pixelblocks. After defeating the B-Manajerk, Chris lectured both of his enemies on the importance of his Love Quest and the absolute necessity of his Attraction Sign.

The B-Manajerk would briefly return in the pages of [[Sonichu 7]], when he and his fellow Manajerks attended the council of villains at PVCC, where [[Mary Lee Walsh]] announced Chris's disappearance into the time void.

==Powers==

In addition to his flight-enabling armor, the B-Manajerk is armed with a pair of large guns, and a golden battle axe.

==Weaknesses==

Pixelblocks,
Sky uppercuts and [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
==See also==
*[[Manajerks]]
*[[Niggos]]

[[Category:Manajerks]]
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]
[[Category:Villains]]

HippoOnYourHead

2010-09-11T15:18:28Z

Jeremyorkin:

[[File:You've got a hippo on your head.jpg|thumb|It stops making sense after this point.]]

'''[http://flipnote.hatena.com/5348F770A0A92AE8@DSi/movie/A92AE8_09D7F00037B5A_000?in=user HippoOnYourHead]''' is Chris's third [[Flipnote Hatena]] animation, uploaded to his profile on 24 [[June 2010]]. This flipnote is Chris's first attempt in the program that features an actual narrative, as opposed to just being an [[UltimateNightmare|animation test]] or [[Don'tGetTrolled!|blatant theft]]. It also sets the basic tone that future flipnotes would conform to: stick figures joylessly acting out "funny" scenes. Chris assuming that he's such a master of [[random access humor|comedy]], decided to put "some" effort into his videos. Many of his sock puppet accounts gave him positive reviews of his flip note video, so it's completely unclear how many [[gal pal|people]] actually watched this video.

This is not the first time Chris has brought up hippos on heads as something he believes is funny. He first brought up this [[random-access humor]] when he edited the [[ED]] page. In the [[Regina e-mails#Random access humor demonstration|Regina e-mails]] it was all but pointed out to him how terribly unfunny it truly was. Apparently Chris didn't get the message.

The flipnote ends with Chris begging for stars, which are essentially Flipnote Hatena's e-penis measurement system, which proves that even "off the [[Internet]]", Chris still wants his [[fanbase]] to do him favors.
{{-}}

==Description==

{{quotebox|Yep, if a Hippo IS on your had, you will likely become flat as paper. LOL. A Silly, [[Random-access humor|Random]] piece from C.W.C. with no meaning whatsoever. }}

== Video ==

{{Infobox/Flipnote
| name = HippoOnYourHead
| video = {{#ev:youtube|0oME_VeGVZo}}
| stardate = June 24, 2010
| previous = [[Don'tGetTrolled]]
| next = [[RandomHumor1Part1]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Praiseme.png|thumb|If you don't, I'll be forced to give myself stars!]]

[''A poorly-drawn boy and girl stand facing each other, when a hippo spontaneously falls on the boy's head'']

'''Girl:''' Ah! You have a hippo on your head.

'''Boy:''' Yeah.

'''Hippo:''' [[Slow-in-the-minds|Dauhhh!]] [''Walks offscreen'']

'''Boy:''' Well, don't just stand there, write a letter on me!

[''The girl walks over to the flattened boy, picks him up, and starts to write'']

'''Girl:''' Dear Sir, Hello! Signed, Buck Williams.

'''Writing:''' If you like decent random humor, please add one green star or a bunch of yellow. CWC. Have a good and safe day. :)

[[Category: Flipnote Hatena]]

Aqua Teen Hunger Force

2010-09-11T14:59:46Z

Jeremyorkin:

[[Image:201-SchuAqua.jpg|thumb|250px|The Aqua Teens in ''[[Sonichu 0]]''. Notice Master Shake and Frylock on the table, and the caption "The bun is in your mind" was Meatwad's catchphrase from the Space Ghost: Coast to Coast episode that featured the first appearance of ATHF]]

'''''Aqua Teen Hunger Force''''' is a a low budget, badly-animated series, so it comes as no surprise to see that Chris likes it, even if he probably doesn't get many of the jokes. He has blatantly ripped them off, most notably in his recent ''[[Little Big Planet]]'' created level. An episode is heard playing during the [[CWC is Angry]] video.

Chris wasn't always a fan of the series. In a [[2005]] post on the [[Adult Swim posts|Cartoon Network forums]], he said that he enjoyed all of Adult Swim's shows "except ATHF," although he didn't explain why. He apparently came around later on, though, and even picked up the (astonishingly shitty) Aqua Teen [[List of Chris's games|PlayStation 2 game]].

==Meatwad custom==
An episode of ATHF had the character Meatwad playing with a toy guitar, which he called the 'Shredwad'. The toy was deliberately cheap and shitty looking in the series, which really says something about Chris's art ability since his duplicate of it is just shitty beyond words. Fortunately, he didn't desicrate a real guitar.
<center>
[[Image:Meatwad_display.png|A picture of meatwad and the guitar Chris ripped off]]
[[Image:Meat.jpg|A customized ATHF Meatwad [[Guitar Hero|gitar]] based on Meatwad's guitar from [[Wikipedia:Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters|Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters]].]]
</center>

==See also==
*''[[Family Guy]]''
*[[Random access humor]]

[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]

25 September 2009

2010-09-10T21:02:53Z

Jeremyorkin:

"'''25 September 2009'''" (officially "'''09252009'''") is a video addressing fake websites and unofficial [[Sonichu]] merchandise. [[Liquid|Like who the heck would act like him and try to be him?]]

==Video==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = 25 September 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|1TZT5zzlFBw}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 25 September 2009
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:website.png]] Website
| Shirt = [[Image:Whiteblacktrim.png]] White with Black Trim
| previous = [[19 September 2009]]
| next = [[29 September 2009]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===
[[Image:Hot_Chocolate.jpg|thumb|Cover of the "Hot Chocolate" comic Chris was trolled with.]]

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate September 25th 2009.

I wish to, uh, elaborate to everybody on the Internet and everybody in my [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] [[True and Loyal Fanbase|fanbase]]. The true, only, sole, legitimate, official websites for Sonichu and Rosechu and everything of that sort are [[CWCkipedia]] and this, the [[YouTube#ChristianWChandler .28August 2009 - present.29|ChristianWChandler]] [[YouTube]] page, that this video originated from. Now, this uh, web—uh, this, uh, [http://www.youtube.com/user/ChrisWChandler ChrisWChandler] YouTube guy, he's an impostor, he's selling fake merchandise, do not buy from him whatsoever, it's not official, and you are—and you are aiding and abetting an illegal guy—a guy who is committing fraud, a scam artist, a con artist. Do not buy into him. Completely ignore him.

And, also, this, uh, google.com/CW—I mean, this [http://sites.google.com/site/sonichusite/home Google.com/SonichuSite]: that's not mine, either; that is a fake website, and this, uh, "[[Homos|Hot Chocolate]] comic" I've heard about through e-mails: that is not mine either, so, disregard that website. Forget about it, because that is a fake. Someone else did that... behind my back. Okay? Anyway, I am continuing work on the, on m—on my original pages... and I'm doing it one moment at a time. I just wanted to let y'all know that.

Peace out, and have a good day.

{{clear}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[19 September 2009]]|nextlink=[[29 September 2009]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

Sonichu's Edge

2010-09-10T20:56:24Z

Jeremyorkin:

[[Image:Mirror's Edge.jpg|thumb|left|The truth about the video title]]
[[Image:Parkay.jpg|thumb|Chris wishes he were eating this instead]]
[[Image:Sonichu's Edge.png|thumb|Artist's depiction]]

"'''Sonichu's Edge'''" (officially "'''Sonichu's Edge.MP4'''") is a video uploaded on [[December 2009| December 3rd, 2009]], in which [[Chris]] goes "[[Father Call|jogging]]". The title is a not-too-subtle [[parody]] of the 3D platformer ''[[Wikipedia: Mirror's Edge|Mirror's Edge]]''.

Based on the accompanying [[3 December 2009|Captain's Log]], he made this to show that he is "pumped up for [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|pushing Sonichu out into merchandise]]." This video proves that Chris has no idea what "jogging" is. He is sprinting (for him) in this video, obviously missing the point of jogging (a slow, easy run). Chris inserts obvious jump cuts at 1:30, 1:58, 2:25, 3:00, 3:22 and 3:42, where he's run out of breath and needs a break due to how [[Chris and health#Exercise|out of shape he is]].

Once again, Chris confuses the acrobatic sport [[Wikipedia:Parkour|parkour]] with the squeezable margarine brand [http://www.parkay.com/index.jsp Parkay]. This ''may'' have something to do with his autism, as the two sound similar. He also confuses "light jogging" with "parkour" in general, because the fat bastard would die after a steady fourty seconds of either.

One can only imagine what the innocent citizens of [[Charlottesville]] must have thought as a fat, sweaty retard went puffing by at a little over walking pace with a camera dangling from his obese neck.

An email in [[Mailbag 16]] pointed out that Chris ran just 579 metres in three and a half minutes, at a snail's pace of 2.8 m/s, nowhere near the 5 miles he claimed. Chris seems unable to estimate measurements of length and time.

Chris has [[Mailbag 29#In which Chris lies about how much he can run|declined to record another running video]], blaming the battery in his camera.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Sonichu's Edge
| image = {{#ev:youtube|U0XXXCV2PfQ}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 03 December 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = {{Power|text}}
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Vert. Red
| previous = [[3 December 2009]]
| next = [[Holiday Greetings]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''Brandishes [[Amnyfest Ring]]''] Hello there, [[trolls|fans]]! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the [[Sonichu]] franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do [[Chris and English|a Parkay]] from this point [''camera spins around to show some sidewalks''] all the way down to the gara—parking garage [''Camera spins back to Chris''] where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held. And for this viewing, the camera will be hung around my neck right about here. [''Gestures to the Sonichu medallion''] To get—see what I see from that point of view. And, also, uh, there may be one or two pauses where I have to catch my—my breath. [[Obesity|Of course that's what you expect]], [[Chris and reality|even from the best runner]].

[''Jump cut. Camera is now apparently hanging around Chris's neck. Chris's hand comes into frame for a second for him to flash the Amnyfest Ring.'']

Alright, here we go!

'''0:42-1:20''' Chris begins running, relatively slowly. His path seems to be pretty erratic.

'''1:21-1:30''' Chris enters a populated area. Though the jerky camera makes it difficult to see, several people seem to stop and stare at him. At 1:28, Chris's heavy breathing becomes audible.

'''1:31-1:44''' First jump cut. For those keeping score, Chris stops to rest after 48 seconds of jogging. He continues through the shopping center, his hands occasionally coming into frame.

'''1:45-1:46''' Chris goes in between some trees.

'''1:47-1:58''' Chris's breathing starts becoming heavy again.

'''1:59-2:15''' Second jump cut. Chris runs past a happy couple, and then runs down some stairs.

'''2:16-2:25''' Chris passes by a large Christmas tree. Around 2:20, his movement begins to slow down considerably.

'''2:26-2:33''' Third jump cut.

'''2:34-2:41''' Relaxing guitar music fades in and out as Chris passes a band of street musicians.

'''2:42-2:54''' Chris continues onwards.

'''2:55-3:00''' Chris runs past a small bus.

'''3:01-3:16''' Fourth jump cut. Chris runs through some decorative trees.

'''3:17-3:21''' Chris rounds a corner, and approaches an open door.

'''3:22-3:32''' Fifth jump cut. Chris is now inside a building. He trudges up some stairs, clearly walking.

'''3:33-3:42''' Chris passes someone going in the opposite direction. He continues upwards.

'''3:43-3:50''' Sixth jump cut. Chris apparently reaches the 4th floor and exits a door into the blinding sunlight.

'''3:51-4:10''' Chris is now on the top level of a parking structure. He runs across the parking area. Around 4:05 his breathing becomes very heavy. At 4:10, he reaches his destination. The camera shows a large tented area on the ground far below.

See? Amphitheater. [''Camera spins around back to Chris, who flashes the peace sign''] Thank you for your [[trolling|continued support]]!

==Remixes==

<center>{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Chris-Chanos
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AbWn-WsljB0}}
| Stardate = 04 December, 2009
| Maker = KrappleGuy
| Subject = [[Sonichu's Edge]]
| Video Type = (TV) Parody
| Other Info = Spoofs the opening to ''The Sopranos''
}}</center>

<center>{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Sonichu's Edge
| video = {{#ev:youtube|eGKCSS-QUkE}}
| Stardate = 04 December, 2009
| Maker = IBAClydeCash
| Subject = [[Sonichu's Edge]]
| Video Type = (VG) Parody
| Other Info = Replaces Faith with [[Chris]].
}}</center>

<center>{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Run Virgin Run
| video = {{#ev:youtube|o1ZgUfmI2vU}}
| Stardate = 04 December, 2009
| Maker = tehcosmicexplorer08
| Subject = [[Sonichu's Edge]]
| Video Type = Dramatic remix
| Other Info = ''Lola Rennt'' soundtrack
}}</center>

==See also==
*[[3 December 2009]]
*[[CWC Fighter]]

==External links==
*[http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?ie=UTF&msa=0&msid=104235379233340359048.000479de54a1731a2b512 Chris's Route as detailed by Google Maps]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2N1TJP1cxmo What Chris is failing to imitate]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RuqRS3KVnQs CWC Doodle- Parkay]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[3 December 2009]]|nextlink=[[Holiday Greetings]]|}}
{{Videos}}
[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Don'tGetTrolled!

2010-09-10T20:35:27Z

Jeremyorkin:

[[File:Youvebeentrolled.png|thumb|You can tell when Chris makes an addition, because suddenly everything sucks]]

'''Don'tGetTrolled''' is [[Chris]]'s second flipnote animation, posted to [[Flipnote Hatena]] on 22 [[June 2010]]. Chris is known for his [[plagiarism]], but this by far the most blatant and obvious theft he's ever undertaken. Viewers will immediately notice the very high animation quality compared to his other pieces. This is because he didn't make them.

The flipnote is a barely remixed version of an [http://flipnote.hatena.com/556109A0A0F27939@DSi/movie/F27939_09D08B2023EB4_016 animation] Chris commented on extensively (see page 21 of the comments for Chris's thoughts). Chris adds very little to the original animation, scrawling a message about [[Internet]] safety on some of the frames, and replacing a picture of [[Sonic]] with one of [[Sonichu]]. His description for the animation begs viewers to show their support for the "Bill for Anti Online Bad-Mouthing", which is presumably a [[law]] Chris dreamed up that would stand in defiance of [[America|freedom of speech]].

Chris actually credits 8-Bit for creating the animation, which is surprising considering how much he usually plagiarizes. Granted, Chris gives this credit in the worst way possible, acting as though 8-Bit is some sort of stalwart ally that supports Chris in his battle against the Bill of Rights. A quick check of the comments on 8-Bit's page shows that Chris made no effort to contact him after his initial rant. It's likely that Chris thought of him as an ally. When informed by [[trolls]] that Chris stole his work, 8-Bit, being a good sport ([[Chris and his ego|and therefore the total opposite of Chris]]), simply posted on the remixed flipnote that he meant for others to modify it to their own tastes.

On top of all of that, Chris completely missed the point of the original video, as it is with everything else he watches. The original message was that if you reply to a troll, then it's your own fault for being a [[naive]] [[retard]]. It's all about personal responsibility for your own actions, which is an alien concept to Chris. Also notable is the fact that Chris locked editing on this video; much like how he [[Download For Play Only|begged people not to change]] his ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' levels, he is just as protective of his flipnotes. Even when they are almost completely devoid of original material.

It does, however, show a few things about Chris and his thoughts. He still classifies [[ED]] as [[4-cent_garbage.com|4-cent Garbage]], believes trolls are always on the lookout to find and post more videos of himself (which is true, and it doesn't help that he gladly delivers), and feels that all personal information should be kept off the Internet and all relationships should be started in real life (which is a bit of misinformation on his part - your information is gonna be on the Internet one way or another and not everything must be initiated in real life as he thinks).

The flipnote was later taken down due to Chris sharing his real name, something against Flipnote Hatena's rules. It was re-uploaded on July 24 after a ban evasion. I would pay more attention to his that his spelling the word campaign wrong than the fact that a [[fail|celebrity]] is on flipnote hatena.

==Description==

{{quotebox|Show Your Support with me and 8-Bit for the Bill for Anti Online Bad-Mouthing.

Awesome! :)}}

==Video==

{{Infobox/Flipnote
| name = Don'tGetTrolled
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DEtLbxtM3tw}}
| stardate = June 22, 2010
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| previous = [[UltimateNightmare]]
| next = [[HippoOnYourHead]]
}}

===Transcript===

''The audio, and the majority of the video in this animation was not created by Chris. This being the case, this Transcription will only cover the additions Chris made.''

'''0:08-0:09'''
 The original text "Don't reply 2 this this guy" is replaced with "Don't reply 2 any of these idiots". Chris also adds a variation of the "Awesome!" smile, and a hieroglyphic that reads "[[4-cent garbage]]".

'''0:14-0:15'''
 In a graphic representing a [[Sonichu Forum|forum thread]], The word "[[Pokémon|pkmn]]" is replaced with the word "Sonichu".

'''0:16-0:18'''
 In the background, behind the singing man, Chris drew a troll, looking through a video camera. Moments later, this is replaced with a frame in the foreground, depicting the singing stickman as though he's in a newspaper article. "8-BITki" is written in the bottom right, as though it's a sort of headline. It's obvious it's supposed to be the [[Main Page]] of the [[CWCki]], but Chris even fails at that.

'''0:21-0:22'''
 What was originally Sonic the Hedgehog is replaced by Sonichu. Chris drew his initials in the margin, because Sonichu is an ORIGINAL CHARACTER DO NOT STEAL.

'''0:23-0:26'''
 Chris wrote several short messages in the background, one appearing after another. "Keep your info to yourself and off the internet!" "Start all relationships in real life only!" "Stay safe and happy online!"

'''0:34-0:35'''
 After the animation proper ends, A two part message from Chris appears. "Remixed by Christian W. Chandler, for the Anti-Internet bad-mouthing campaigne [sic]." "Thanks to '8-Bit' for the original flipnote and anti-troll support."

[[Category: Flipnote Hatena]]