CWCki - User contributions [en]

Template:Video of the now

2011-08-24T04:01:03Z

Jerkop:

<center>{{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}</center>
<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits pride of place on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is used to display a video, which is normally related to recent Chris activity - or in quieter times - amusing fan-created content. Suggestions for new videos of the now can be discussed on [[Template talk:Video of the now|this template's talk page]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

Template:Video of the now

2011-08-09T21:53:24Z

Jerkop:

<center>{{#ev:youtube|FTS2n3A7Gzc}}</center>
<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits pride of place on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is used to display a video, which is normally related to recent Chris activity - or in quieter times - amusing fan-created content. Suggestions for new videos of the now can be discussed on [[Template talk:Video of the now|this template's talk page]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

Template:Video of the now

2011-08-06T22:15:01Z

Jerkop:

<center>{{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}</center>
<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits pride of place on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is used to display a video, which is normally related to recent Chris activity - or in quieter times - amusing fan-created content. Suggestions for new videos of the now can be discussed on [[Template talk:Video of the now|this template's talk page]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

April 2011

2011-04-29T02:41:19Z

Jerkop:

'''April 2011''' has begun with Chris continuing to play [[PS3]] and hiding from [[troll]]s.

==Events==

* 29 April: Several pictures of Chris [[Tomgirl Pictures|dressed as a woman]] are released.

==References==

<references/>

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

Template:Video of the now

2011-04-29T01:32:59Z

Jerkop:

<center>{{#ev:youtube|ouhrbqO_GtM}}</center>
<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits pride of place on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is used to display a video, which is normally related to recent Chris activity - or in quieter times - amusing fan-created content. Suggestions for new videos of the now can be discussed on [[Template talk:Video of the now|this template's talk page]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

Template:Da update

2010-10-30T17:13:03Z

Jerkop:

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
* 30 October - Chris decides to [[Don'tPintheOop|talk about dirty, crapped briefs]], [[ShowerClean|cleans his shower]], [[SpaghettiRoutine|pretends to cook]], [[WelcometoBollywood|pretends he's doing Bollywood]], [[Book10Replacement|finally redoes Sonichu 10]], [[DrainedCreativity|but then blames trolls for no more Sonichu]], [[DivineTrial|pretends he's in a trial]], [[JuggaloShoutOut|gives a shout out to the Juggalos]], [[HairDifference|compares his hair]], [[Ghostbusters_(video)|pretends he's in the Ghostbusters]], and [[ToJackie|begs Jackie not to leave him]].
* 25 October - Chris [[SonichuBabies|plays with sonees & roseys]], [[PlayingHouse|plays with legos]], [[Wigwam|smokes tobacky]], and uploads a [[DayOut|series of videos of him driving around]]. Later, Chris [[WeighIn|weighs himself]] and [[FullHouse|sings the ''Full House'' theme]].
* 19 October - Chris uploads a remake of him [[Pregnant Act#The Remake|giving birth]], followed by [[a Workout|a workout]].
('''[[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|more...]]''')

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, including new videos, family news and updates to ongoing [[saga]]s. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 6 or 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

A Public Announcement for Congress

2010-10-19T05:35:02Z

Jerkop:

Chris offers a number of initiatives that would give [[tugboat|free money]] to [[Bob|senior citizens]]. In addition, he suggests that all of the guns go to the [[jerkops|Police]], and that [[It's UGH!|Gays are accepted]] in Chris' [[CWCVille|Utopian society]].

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghfoOqS2mM8

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Public Announcement for Congress
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ghfoOqS2mM8}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject =
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt =
| previous = [[Vitameatavegamin]]
| next = Current
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gilligan Be or Not]]|nextlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress|Current]]}}

A Public Announcement for Congress

2010-10-19T05:32:52Z

Jerkop:

Chris offers a number of initiatives that would give [[tugboat|free money]] to [[Bob|senior citizens]]. In addition, he suggests that all of the guns go to the [[jerkops|Police]], and that [[It's okay to be gay|Gays are accepted]] in Chris' [[CWCVille|Utopian society]].

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghfoOqS2mM8

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Public Announcement for Congress
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ghfoOqS2mM8}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject =
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt =
| previous = [[Vitameatavegamin]]
| next = Current
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gilligan Be or Not]]|nextlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress|Current]]}}

Vitameatavegamin

2010-10-19T05:30:00Z

Jerkop:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAqqSJssgBQ

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Vitameatavegamin
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gAqqSJssgBQ}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject =
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt =
| previous = [[Gilligan Be or Not]]
| next = [[A Public Announcement for Congress]]
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gilligan Be or Not]]|nextlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]}}

Gilligan Be or Not

2010-10-19T05:28:04Z

Jerkop:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkYWc6YJWYw

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Gilligan Be or Not
| video = {{#ev:youtube|FkYWc6YJWYw}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject =
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt =
| previous = [[Breast Cancer Awareness]]
| next = [[Vitameatavegamin]]
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Breast Cancer Awareness]]|nextlink=[[Vitameatavegamin]]}}

Breast Cancer Awareness

2010-10-19T05:23:54Z

Jerkop:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9es2xamI57s&f

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Breast Cancer Awareness
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9es2xamI57s&f}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject =
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt =
| previous = [[Pregnant Act]]
| next = [[Gilligan Be or Not]]
}}

=== Transcription ===

''[Chris is sitting in his kitchen with his shirt obviously padded to make it appear like he has very large breasts. Throughout the radio or television plays loudly in the background]''

Seriously, though, folks, there is something else that you should be aware of ''[He scratches his noses, and glances off-screen]'' you know, breast cancer. You know what that's both us both males and females, regardless of size. ''[He adjusts his fake breasts, pauses, then laughs]''

Anyway, make yourselves aware of this. You should feel your tatas. ''[Cups his own fake breasts, then a creepy stare at the camera]'' Feel your breasts. Check to see if you have any lumps, they could be breast cancer. You never know. If you suspect breast cancer, go get yourself checked out with a doctor. Breast cancer awareness. ''[Draws a ribbon in the air with his fingertip]'' Pink ribbon.

''[Cuts to a closeup on his chest, fake breasts still intact. Radio/TV is no longer in the background]''

Hey. Hey hey. Hey! ''[He grabs the camera, pointing it towards his face]'' Eyes up here, buddy.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Pregnant Act]]|nextlink=[[Gilligan Be or Not]]}}

Breast Cancer Awareness

2010-10-19T05:22:05Z

Jerkop:

Template:Da update

2010-10-19T05:19:09Z

Jerkop:

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
* 19 October - Chris uploads a video of him [[Pregnant Act|giving birth]], followed by one promoting [[Breast Cancer Awareness|breast cancer awareness]], a short [[A Public Announcement for Congress|political ad]], and bits [[Vitameatavegamin|lifted]] from [[I Love Lucy]] and [[Gilligan Be or Not|Gilligan's Island]].
* 14 October - Chris dresses up as a [[I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat|wizard]] and [[100 2281‎|tries to appeal to Lars]], again.
* 12 October - Clyde Cash releases the [[BlueSpike Skype Logs]], [[Sarah May Skype Logs]], and the last of the [[Reggie]] e-mails.
* 12 October - Chris dresses as Fred Flintstone in a [[100 2277|new video]], then pretends he's Cleveland Brown in a [[100 2279|considerably weak video]].
* 10 October - Chris slathers himself in blue paint and transforms into his [[ECV 00002|super-mode]].
* 9 October - Chris [[ECV 00001|explains]] what the [[Cherokee]] are with a Playstation Move and then he goes on [[A Hike]].
* 7 October - Chris uploads a [[100 2267|video]] where he impersonates [[Clyde Cash]], then [[100 2270|goes on]] to impersonate [[Alec Benson Leary]] and Paul McCartney of The Beatles [[100 2269|too]].
* 4 October - Chris decides to [[100 2266|dress up as Grimace]] and sings a song about bullying.
('''[[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|more...]]''')

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, including new videos, family news and updates to ongoing [[saga]]s. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 6 or 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

100 2281

2010-10-19T05:15:36Z

Jerkop:

'''100 2281''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 15 [[October 2010]]. In it, he shows us how he acts drunk, guzzling down [[alcohol|Kahlúa]] with great abandon and dressing up and speaking like a [[niggo|"gangsta"]]. Though, the way he speaks sounds more like Cleveland Brown of ''[[The Cleveland Show]]'' and ''[[Family Guy]]'' fame.

During the video, Chris looks like he is about to cry while he's telling off Lars.

Note that this video takes place in Chris's kitchen, and visible in the background is the Christmas Tree seen in the [[Tour of Chris's House]] in early 2009.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2281
| video = {{#ev:youtube|taoCoVHpYXw}}
| stardate = 15 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Smug|text}}, {{Tragedy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt =
| previous = [[I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat|I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat]]
| next = [[Pregnant_Act|Pregnant Act]]
}}

== Transcription ==

[''Chris is sitting down in front of the computer in his family's kitchen. He has a [[Adam Stackhouse|colorful bandana]] wrapped around his head, and holds a bottle of Kahlúa coffee liqueur in his right hand. He appears to be trying to act like a [[niggo]], and ends up looking like a drunk fuck.'']

Hey, yo, [[Lars]] m'man, wud on th' street y'is... Y'all... buh- Word on the street here is, y'all trying to ju- mi-, tryin' to misjudge me wit' dat dang old jivin' lingo dat the [[trolls]] been using. You calling me a god-dang [[homos|yomosettsual]], I tell you what, bro, that ain't the truth. I'm straight, man, I was born straight. I loves my woman, and I loves the [[china|pussy]].

[''He takes a swig from the bottle, then winces and grimaces before returning to his rant.'']

And this aka-chaka coffee ya drink, huh... Tell you what, if that be... If that was considered equivalent to an aka-chaka milk, I tell ya, that's jive, man. And then y'all drank, y'all drank, man... [''He waves the bottle towards the camera.''] You drivin'! You jivin'!

I mean, if you haddita, I mean... C'mon man, you go and dang...[''brief pause'']...go put your boats over [[Jackie]] like dat. Dat's straight down, yo. [''Gives two thumbs down.''] Thuuuumbs down. You ain't got nuthin', bro. You got nuthin'. So quit trying to win Jackie back with them got-dang lies those trolls come up with. You know what? That just makes you one of them. And they be trollin' you back. They troll you back, dawg.

[''Chris pauses again.'']

You think about that. You think about dat, you jive-ass turkey!

[''He reaches up and turns off the camera.'']

===Translation===

Hey, Lars. I hear you're misjudging me using harsh language much like that used by trolls. Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm straight and have been since birth. I love women and, therefore, love vagina. I scoff at this acacia coffee you drink. If you want to imply that my Kahlúa is an equivalent to acacia milk, well that's just false. You cared more about your boats than you cared about Jackie. You have no ammunition in this fight. I suggest you stop trying to win back Jackie's heart using the lies perpetuated by the trolls. In fact, I'd say that you were trying to be one of them, but they may just end up trolling you. Reflect on these words, good sir.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat]]|nextlink=[[Pregnant Act]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

100 2281

2010-10-19T05:13:40Z

Jerkop:

'''100 2281''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 15 [[October 2010]]. In it, he shows us how he acts drunk, guzzling down [[alcohol|Kahlúa]] with great abandon and dressing up and speaking like a [[niggo|"gangsta"]]. Though, the way he speaks sounds more like Cleveland Brown of ''[[The Cleveland Show]]'' and ''[[Family Guy]]'' fame.

During the video, Chris looks like he is about to cry while he's telling off Lars.

Note that this video takes place in Chris's kitchen, and visible in the background is the Christmas Tree seen in the [[Tour of Chris's House]] in early 2009.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2281
| video = {{#ev:youtube|taoCoVHpYXw}}
| stardate = 15 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Smug|text}}, {{Tragedy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt =
| previous = [[I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat|I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat]]
| next = [[Pregnant_Act|Pregnant Act]]
}}

== Transcription ==

[''Chris is sitting down in front of the computer in his family's kitchen. He has a [[Adam Stackhouse|colorful bandana]] wrapped around his head, and holds a bottle of Kahlúa coffee liqueur in his right hand. He appears to be trying to act like a [[niggo]], and ends up looking like a drunk fuck.'']

Hey, yo, [[Lars]] m'man, wud on th' street y'is... Y'all... buh- Word on the street here is, y'all trying to ju- mi-, tryin' to misjudge me wit' dat dang old jivin' lingo dat the [[trolls]] been using. You calling me a god-dang [[homos|yomosettsual]], I tell you what, bro, that ain't the truth. I'm straight, man, I was born straight. I loves my woman, and I loves the [[china|pussy]].

[''He takes a swig from the bottle, then winces and grimaces before returning to his rant.'']

And this aka-chaka coffee ya drink, huh... Tell you what, if that be... If that was considered equivalent to an aka-chaka milk, I tell ya, that's jive, man. And then y'all drank, y'all drank, man... [''He waves the bottle towards the camera.''] You drivin'! You jivin'!

I mean, if you haddita, I mean... C'mon man, you go and dang...[''brief pause'']...go put your boats over [[Jackie]] like dat. Dat's straight down, yo. [''Gives two thumbs down.''] Thuuuumbs down. You ain't got nuthin', bro. You got nuthin'. So quit trying to win Jackie back with them got-dang lies those trolls come up with. You know what? That just makes you one of them. And they be trollin' you back. They troll you back, dawg.

[''Chris pauses again.'']

You think about that. You think about dat, you jive-ass turkey!

[''He reaches up and turns off the camera.'']

===Translation===

Hey, Lars. I hear you're misjudging me using harsh language much like that used by trolls. Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm straight and have been since birth. I love women and, therefore, love vagina. I scoff at this acacia coffee you drink. If you want to imply that my Kahlúa is an equivalent to acacia milk, well that's just false. You cared more about your boats than you cared about Jackie. You have no ammunition in this fight. I suggest you stop trying to win back Jackie's heart using the lies perpetuated by the trolls. In fact, I'd say that you were trying to be one of them, but they may just end up trolling you. Reflect on these words, good sir.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat]]|nextlink=[[100 2281|Current]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Template:Video of the now

2010-10-11T15:40:02Z

Jerkop:

<center>{{#ev:youtube|lDSQAmLPbw0}}</center>
<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits pride of place on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is used to display a video, which is normally related to recent Chris activity - or in quieter times - amusing fan-created content. Suggestions for new videos of the now can be discussed on [[Template talk:Video of the now|this template's talk page]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

100 2261.MOV

2010-10-01T21:41:04Z

Jerkop:

'''100 2261.MOV''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 1 [[October 2010]]. In it, [[Chris_and_remorse|Chris expresses remorse]] for various actions including blaming [[Michael Snyder]] for having been [[banned]] from [[The GAMe PLACe]]. As with most things, Chris blames [[video game]]-induced [[stress]] as the leading cause of his behaviour.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2261
| video = {{#ev:youtube|p7ZgQI1oaiE}}
| stardate = 1 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Rumors|text}}, {{Video games|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| shirt = {{PokemonLeague|text}}
| previous = [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]]
| next = Current
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}, {{Game Place|text}}
}}

===Transcript===
{{Transcription}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]]|nextlink=Current}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Saga

2010-09-28T04:30:24Z

Jerkop: /* Asperchu Saga */

[[Image:Timeline.png|thumb|right]]
A '''saga''' (from the old Norse ''sögur'') is an overall story arch of events.

In the world of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the term is used to describe any on-going trolling effort that produces considerable drama. Sometimes taking place over the course of months, other times taking place over the course of a few weeks. Since he was discovered online and found to have many hot buttons that made him susceptible to entrapment, Chris has been perpetually embroiled in some saga or other. More often than not, he is trapped in more than one saga at a time or found to be quickly jumping from the end of one to the beginning of the next. The term first came into widespread use with [[Miyamoto saga]] and has since been used to describe the overall events in a time period (similar to the term ''dynasty'').

Some argue that the usage may have originated with [[Vivian Gee]]'s [[Audiobook]] saga project.

==List of Sagas==

===Megan Saga===
[[Image:Megansagaheader.jpg]]

{{main|Megan Schroeder}}

The first and longest saga in the story of Christian Weston Chandler. From 2005 to 18 March 2008, this told the story of Chris and his longest and closest relationship with a girl, Megan Schroeder, leading into Chris's first encounter with [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and Megan discovering the depths of Chris's madness. It began with a chance meeting at a [[Pokémon]] TCG League meeting at [[The GAMe PLACe]], which progressed into inappropriate touching and ended with shocking [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|hand drawn pornography]] that was an embarrassment for all parties involved... excluding Chris.

===Adam Stackhouse Saga===
[[Image:Adamsaga.jpg]]

: ''See also: [[Adam Stackhouse]], [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]]''

In June of 2007, Chris entered and attempted to win a contest in order to win Megan's heart, only to be <s>cockblocked</s> beaten by a much superior entry, made by Adam Stackhouse. The saga resulted in [[CWC_is_Angry|madman]] style threats and [[PaRappa_contest#Aftermath|several angry emails and posts to contest organizers]]. Chris would rage for quite some time, before deciding enough was enough. This was also the last time a saga was inadvertently caused by an unsuspecting member of the public. From this time on, [[trolls]] would control the content.

===ED Saga===
[[Image:Edsaga.jpg]]

: ''See also: [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]

In November 2007, [[trolls]] would discover Chris and put up the Chris-chan page on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] webpage. Chris would initially think that they just got information wrong, but as time would go on, Chris would reveal the true depths of insanity, destroying his friendship with Megan Schroeder and becoming the epic lolcow we know him to be. Were it not for this article showing how susceptible he was to trolling and how [[Autism|divinely retarded]] he could be, Chris may have just been another dumbass with no life, and probably would have been more or less forgotten by now. To this day, ED remains a thorn in his side which he must constantly address to those new to his life. Further to this, he still maintains they are out to do him harm.

===Blanca Saga===
[[Image:Blancasaga.jpg]]

{{main|Blanca Weiss}}

Around August 2008, Chris would meet Blanca Weiss, making her his first internet sweetheart. Aside from being the first sweetheart, she also proved how [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_13th%2C_2008|tenacious and strange]] Chris could be about relationships, revealing several [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_9th%2C_2008|quirks and oddities that he felt were somehow appropriate to mention]] to someone he believed loved him. It also showed how useless any [[White_knight|white-knighting]] efforts could be. In the span of two months, Blanca (actually three trolls working in tandem) would release the infamous pictures of Chris naked, then obtain and destroy Chris's [[Medallion of Fail|medallions]].

===Jimmy Hill Saga===
[[Image:Jimmyhillsaga.jpg]]

{{main|Jimmy Hill}}

At the same time Chris was dealing with Blanca, he was hit with another troll attack as he believed that a man known as Jimmy Hill was using the Sonichu name and character to make money off of him in Europe. The thought of someone making money from his true and original creation led him to [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|stress out and provide proof]] of the [[Copyright|infringement]]. Those attacks would end around the same time the Blanca Saga ended.

===Clyde Cash Saga===
[[Image:Clydesaga.jpg]]

{{main|Clyde Cash}}

In an attempt to get back at Chris for his [[Ryan_Cash|brother's suicide]], Clyde Cash would go on a months-long trolling spree, going to great lengths to get back at the autistic wonder. The saga would result in the revelation of a [[The Miscreants|top secret organization]] hell-bent on preventing the manchild from losing his virginity. It only ended with the apparent death of its creator.

However, in [[September 2009]] Chris resumed his war against Clyde Cash, after discovering that he and another supposed troll,[[Gregg Mays]], were one and the same person. In the process, he's made numerous videos attempting to blackmail the man, going so far as to mock a [[Twin Falling Towers|national tragedy]].

And so it continues to this date; a never-ending conflict between two mortal enemies...

===PandaHalo Saga===
[[Image:Pandasaga.jpg]]

{{main|PandaHalo}}

When Chris realized Blanca was a troll, he would move on to PandaHalo as his new sweetheart. The saga came to a quick and abrupt end when she was found to be bearing the child of Clyde Cash, conceived through rape. Unsurprisingly, Chris would quickly abandon Panda and she would (presumably) die in the Australian brushfires, despite living miles away from the incident. She would end up giving trolls the [[Scrapbook of Fail]] and [[Slideshow]].

===Miyamoto Saga===
[[Image:Miyamotosaga.jpg]]

{{main|Miyamoto Saga}}

In the beginning of January 2009, Chris would be confronted by <s>[[Clyde Cash|a troll]]</s> [[Shigeru Miyamoto]], who would attempt to try to make his Sonichu game fantasy a reality. Chris's ineptitude and inability to do... well... anything other than be a lazy fuck resulted in horrible delays and stalls to the project's advancement. In the end, [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] shut down the entire project with a scathing letter. This trolling encounter would have Chris give trolls a Powerpoint project that talked in great length about [[Chris and his ego|himself]]... and very little about his game.

===Julie Saga===
[[Image:Juliesaga.jpg]]

{{main|Julie}}

In February 2009 to early March 2009, Chris's latest sweetheart would be Julie, who was in actuality a young troll named [[BlueSpike]]. In this brief time frame, BlueSpike would release the infamous [[sex tape]], force Chris to declare [[BILLY MAYS]] mayor of [[CWCville]] and destroy his second medallion by forcing him to stick it up his ass. However, BlueSpike's total and utter control over Chris would lead to a schism between trolls, leading to the creation of the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]] and this very wiki.

===Ivy Saga===
[[Image:Ivysaga.jpg]]

{{main|Ivy}}

In March 2009, Chris would meet and fall in love with Ivy, his then-latest sweetheart. His crush towards Ivy would lead Chris to create three special comics and two music videos, a practical [[semen|spurt]] of work that wouldn't be surpassed for awhile. The saga also revealed Chris at his [[I_am_devoted_to_My_Sweetest_Ivy|creepiest]] [[CWC's_Message_for_Ivy|yet]], scarring many trolls and CWC-watchers. The saga also resulted in a [[CWC's_¨It's_All_Coming_Back_To_Me¨|proposal of marriage]]. Despite the work spurt, the saga would come to an abrupt end thanks to a combination of troll interference from [[Joshua Martinez]] and interference from [[Bob Chandler]] and [[Rocky Shoemaker]].

===Liquid Chris Saga===
[[Image:Liquidsaga.jpg]]

{{main|Liquid Chris}}

In July 2009, the TRUE and HONEST Christan Weston Chandler would come forth after the other Chris would reveal himself as a troll in one video. The other Chris, [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], would challenge Chris to a sing-off, with the TRUE and HONEST CWC proving himself the victor in the end. The appearance of this other Chris would pressure the other into churning out more comics than he had before, currently heading for the completion of [[Sonichu 9]], something that many believed would never happen due to the interference of many trolls.

Later, Liquid would return to continue on his quest to get rid of this faker. In the process of this new entry to the saga, Ian and Chris would battle over the heart of Chris's true love [[Kacey]]. In the end, the real Chris would win out and marry Kacey, leaving Ian to be butthurt.

===CWCipedia Saga===
[[Image:The CWCipedia Saga.jpg]]

{{main|CWCipedia}}

In early June 2009, Chris was given the CWCipedia, a Wiki-styled web page, so that Chris can use it to upload his Sonichu comics, blog, and personal life to, safe from the trolls who instantly dive at his other web pages and hack them. It doubled as a source for the [[CWCki]] to draw many of Chris's latest failures from, making it his best friend and his worst enemy.

On 19 [[November 2009]], perhaps one of the greatest features the Wiki introduced was the [[Mailbag]], in which a dump of all [[Fans|fan]] emails sent to the admin's address could be answered by Chris, for all to see. This feature provided insight into how Chris responds to trolls through email about his views on, for example, homosexuality, GodJesus, autism, etc.

Since 23 November 2009, advertisements linking to porn sites, gay rights organizations, information on Asperger syndrome, and the [[Asperchu|Asperpedia]] took residence on the CWCipedia, paid for by trolls. Eventually, Alec, the creator of Asperchu, paid Jack Thaddeus to replace most, if not all, of the ads with ads for Asperpedia. Chris had [[Address_to_my_Cwcipedia_SysOp|complained]] [[ChrisChanSonichu_and_WikiSysop_correspondence|repeatedly]] to the SysOp of the Wiki about these ads, which would have paid for the site until the end of 2010, pending negotiations.<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:ChrisChanSonichu</ref> All of this had "stressed" Chris out to the point of uploading videos of himself screaming [[death threats]] upon the advertisers' heads, and creating a separate, stress free, ad-free front page.

This saga would lead to the site being shut down twice in a row, both due to copyright infringement, and would lead to the death of [[Simonla Rosechu]] in the most humiliating way - death by exploding toilet.

The Asperpedia team would continue to vandalize and hijack CWCipedia in a variety of ways until it finally collapsed in May, and Chris finally abandoned the site after already making numerous claims that he'd quit the internet forever. After Mao moved in to fill the void, he passed ownership to [[Alec]] and [[Vivian Gee]], wherein they took over the site and the rights to Sonichu to begin [[Sonichu Season 2]], where ultimately, on 26 [[June 2010]], the entire site would be terminated along with the entirety of the original 110mb server.

===Asperchu Saga===
[[Image:The Asperchu Saga.jpg]]

{{main|Asperchu}}

In late November 2009, an artist named Alec Benson Leary started a new series called Asperchu, starring the titular Electric Asperger's Hedgehog Pokemon. Chris had spent most of December ignoring Asperchu and its popularity before finally exploding with rage, claiming the series as nothing more than fan fiction and a parody. The popularity of Asperchu, combined with Chris's continuing downward spiral that is [[Sonichu 10]], has led many of Chris's fans to abandon Sonichu and go to Asperchu.

Most of the saga has been spent with Chris raging at not just Alec, but also [[Evan]], [[Fan:Moon-Pals|Sean]] and Asperpedia admin Mao over their usage of their characters and how they mock him. As well, Chris has been dealing with Evan over the usage of Simonla Rosechu, with Chris going so far as to deny reality and substitute it with his own.

In terms of productivity, it has given us Sonichu 10, which showcases Chris going all out in trying to get rid of everything he hates, including homosexuality and trolls. In that same book, Chris kills all four trolls involved in this saga as retaliation for making him kill Simonla Rosechu. As well, [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls|nine phone calls]] has been leaked. These phone calls show Alec attempting to get through to Chris and his way of thinking and Chris fighting tooth and nail not to change at all.

In the aftermath of the saga, Evan ceased his Simonchu comic, proud to have Simonla removed, Alec and Sean continued their respective comics and Mao continues to poke and jab at Chris. And while the saga had for the most part died down, Asperpedia continued to harass its rival CWCipedia, either by placing new ads, vandalizing it, or shutting it down altogether. One of the post-trial ads even precipitated Chris's falling out with [[Jackie e-mails|Jackie]].

===Surfshack Tito Saga===
[[Image:The Surfshack Tito Saga.jpg]]

{{Main|Surfshack Tito}}

Sometime in January 2010, Chris met and fell in love with a certain girl in real life, hoping she would be the one who'd end his streak of being a [[virgin with rage]]. On 9 March 2010, Chris would release a ''[[Little Big Planet]]'' video of a stage based off a book he was helping write with his gal-pal... and release a name in the process. Dedicated trolls used the information to discover the gal-pal's identity, but decided to let the [[lulz]] spread naturally. The next day, however, a troll revealed the information to the gal-pal, codenamed [[The Wallflower]], and while one set of lulz was stopped, another one was set into motion.

The troll, calling himself Surfshack Tito, claimed responsibility for not only hacking his PSN accounts for the umpteenth time, but also stealing the Wallflower from Chris. Chris, in response, has threatened to go all out and seemingly try to murder Tito, threatening him with a [[Pocket knife|pocket knife]], attacking him with [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|racial slurs]], and flashing his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|underwear]] in the process. At the same time, Chris has discovered and declared war on the CWCki, demanding that all pages involving himself, his friends and family be altered to suit his needs. In short order, Chris's attack on the CWCki fell utterly short.

The creativity here has been utterly stunted, especially after the Wallflower left him. He has gone on to blame his fans for wanting him to make more comics and compared them to the trolls that have tormented him. He has also vowed to leave the internet forever, though he ended up reshowing his face 36 hours after his vow...

=== The GAMe PLACe Saga ===
{{main|The GAMe PLACe|Michael Snyder}}

For a long time, Chris had been visiting The GAMe PLACe on a regular basis, dating as far back as before the Megan saga. It was here that Chris would meet Megan herself, as well as [[Lucas]] and [[Mimms]], two people who would deliver a number of intel over Chris during his time there. He also participated in the [[Pokemon TCG]] League, using his own poorly made decks. However, Chris was a pain to the store's manager, [[Michael Snyder]] and by August 2008, tired of Chris terrorizing various [[niggos|patrons]], yelling at children, bogarting the TV and all-around being a pain, Michael would finally ban Chris from the store, embarrassing him and his mother in the process. It wouldn't be the end, however.

On multiple occasions, Chris returned to the store despite Michael's insistence that he never come back. He tried emails, sneaking in, [[Apology to Game & Hobby Place|pleading]] on [[YouTube]], but nothing worked. The first time he attempted (unsuccessfully, of course) to lift his ban in person was with a prepared, [[Chris and remorse|faux-apologetic speech]]. When that failed, he stormed out angrily and called Michael a [[Chris and race|JEW]], then attempted to rally his "fanbase" and get them [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|to troll him]]. [[6 June 2010|The next occasion]] was much more disturbing. He claimed he was trying to take a picture of Michael for a dartboard, but was caught in the act and was chased in the parking lot. Nearly running over Michael and his daughter, eventually the [[Jerkops]] got involved, but they did not arrest him. Michael accused him of trying to take [[pedofork|pictures of his daughter]]. Whether it's true or not, it's [[Kacey|confirmed]] that Chris has stalker tendencies.

==Intermittent Sagas==

===The CWC Exile Saga===

{{main|Rocky Shoemaker|Fridays After Five|Flipnote Hatena}}

After Chris lost The Wallflower and fought with Surfshack Tito, an outside force attempted to push Chris away from the Internet. In no less than five times, Chris has boldly claimed that he has abandoned the Internet and smugly told his detractors that they should go outside and live their lives, advice Chris should have followed ''years'' ago. However, Chris still latched onto the Internet as much as he could, trying to find ways to sneak in without the force discovering him.

Trolls would end up discovering Chris dancing like a dying turkey at [[Fridays After Five]], then discover that he had set up shop at the [[Flipnote Hatena]], where he tried to spread his sick and twisted thoughts to younger, innocent people before being shut down. However, the thing that would finally bring Chris back to the Internet and end his exile would be [[The MovingForward videos|the destruction of his beloved Life Upgrade]]. At his own hands, no less!

==Post-exile==

===Jackie Saga===

{{main|Jackie}}
Following the fallout of the Wallflower incident, Chris pulled himself away from the Internet, only for him to meet and begin conversing to a woman named Jackie. Meeting her at [[The Hook Cafe]], the two began conversing through [[Jackie Emails|E-mails]], revealing the rationale in Chris's attempts to get back into the GAMe PLACe and showing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|he's still incredibly disturbing]]. However, Chris broke off his relationship with her after she attempted to get him to change his life for the better.

Amazingly, it seems that Jackie and Chris has attempted to try again with a relationship, showing even more [[Song for Jackie.MOV|disturbing videos]] in the process, possibly turning Jackie into the next [[Ivy]].

==The future==
If anything remains clear, it is that Chris is incapable of applying past events to current ones. Given this, it is likely that Chris will be enduring one saga or another until the day he dies.

==See also==
*''[[Excel Saga]]''

==References==
<references/>

[[Category:Trolling]]

Saga

2010-09-28T04:21:55Z

Jerkop: /* Liquid Chris Saga */

[[Image:Timeline.png|thumb|right]]
A '''saga''' (from the old Norse ''sögur'') is an overall story arch of events.

In the world of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the term is used to describe any on-going trolling effort that produces considerable drama. Sometimes taking place over the course of months, other times taking place over the course of a few weeks. Since he was discovered online and found to have many hot buttons that made him susceptible to entrapment, Chris has been perpetually embroiled in some saga or other. More often than not, he is trapped in more than one saga at a time or found to be quickly jumping from the end of one to the beginning of the next. The term first came into widespread use with [[Miyamoto saga]] and has since been used to describe the overall events in a time period (similar to the term ''dynasty'').

Some argue that the usage may have originated with [[Vivian Gee]]'s [[Audiobook]] saga project.

==List of Sagas==

===Megan Saga===
[[Image:Megansagaheader.jpg]]

{{main|Megan Schroeder}}

The first and longest saga in the story of Christian Weston Chandler. From 2005 to 18 March 2008, this told the story of Chris and his longest and closest relationship with a girl, Megan Schroeder, leading into Chris's first encounter with [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and Megan discovering the depths of Chris's madness. It began with a chance meeting at a [[Pokémon]] TCG League meeting at [[The GAMe PLACe]], which progressed into inappropriate touching and ended with shocking [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|hand drawn pornography]] that was an embarrassment for all parties involved... excluding Chris.

===Adam Stackhouse Saga===
[[Image:Adamsaga.jpg]]

: ''See also: [[Adam Stackhouse]], [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]]''

In June of 2007, Chris entered and attempted to win a contest in order to win Megan's heart, only to be <s>cockblocked</s> beaten by a much superior entry, made by Adam Stackhouse. The saga resulted in [[CWC_is_Angry|madman]] style threats and [[PaRappa_contest#Aftermath|several angry emails and posts to contest organizers]]. Chris would rage for quite some time, before deciding enough was enough. This was also the last time a saga was inadvertently caused by an unsuspecting member of the public. From this time on, [[trolls]] would control the content.

===ED Saga===
[[Image:Edsaga.jpg]]

: ''See also: [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]

In November 2007, [[trolls]] would discover Chris and put up the Chris-chan page on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] webpage. Chris would initially think that they just got information wrong, but as time would go on, Chris would reveal the true depths of insanity, destroying his friendship with Megan Schroeder and becoming the epic lolcow we know him to be. Were it not for this article showing how susceptible he was to trolling and how [[Autism|divinely retarded]] he could be, Chris may have just been another dumbass with no life, and probably would have been more or less forgotten by now. To this day, ED remains a thorn in his side which he must constantly address to those new to his life. Further to this, he still maintains they are out to do him harm.

===Blanca Saga===
[[Image:Blancasaga.jpg]]

{{main|Blanca Weiss}}

Around August 2008, Chris would meet Blanca Weiss, making her his first internet sweetheart. Aside from being the first sweetheart, she also proved how [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_13th%2C_2008|tenacious and strange]] Chris could be about relationships, revealing several [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_9th%2C_2008|quirks and oddities that he felt were somehow appropriate to mention]] to someone he believed loved him. It also showed how useless any [[White_knight|white-knighting]] efforts could be. In the span of two months, Blanca (actually three trolls working in tandem) would release the infamous pictures of Chris naked, then obtain and destroy Chris's [[Medallion of Fail|medallions]].

===Jimmy Hill Saga===
[[Image:Jimmyhillsaga.jpg]]

{{main|Jimmy Hill}}

At the same time Chris was dealing with Blanca, he was hit with another troll attack as he believed that a man known as Jimmy Hill was using the Sonichu name and character to make money off of him in Europe. The thought of someone making money from his true and original creation led him to [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|stress out and provide proof]] of the [[Copyright|infringement]]. Those attacks would end around the same time the Blanca Saga ended.

===Clyde Cash Saga===
[[Image:Clydesaga.jpg]]

{{main|Clyde Cash}}

In an attempt to get back at Chris for his [[Ryan_Cash|brother's suicide]], Clyde Cash would go on a months-long trolling spree, going to great lengths to get back at the autistic wonder. The saga would result in the revelation of a [[The Miscreants|top secret organization]] hell-bent on preventing the manchild from losing his virginity. It only ended with the apparent death of its creator.

However, in [[September 2009]] Chris resumed his war against Clyde Cash, after discovering that he and another supposed troll,[[Gregg Mays]], were one and the same person. In the process, he's made numerous videos attempting to blackmail the man, going so far as to mock a [[Twin Falling Towers|national tragedy]].

And so it continues to this date; a never-ending conflict between two mortal enemies...

===PandaHalo Saga===
[[Image:Pandasaga.jpg]]

{{main|PandaHalo}}

When Chris realized Blanca was a troll, he would move on to PandaHalo as his new sweetheart. The saga came to a quick and abrupt end when she was found to be bearing the child of Clyde Cash, conceived through rape. Unsurprisingly, Chris would quickly abandon Panda and she would (presumably) die in the Australian brushfires, despite living miles away from the incident. She would end up giving trolls the [[Scrapbook of Fail]] and [[Slideshow]].

===Miyamoto Saga===
[[Image:Miyamotosaga.jpg]]

{{main|Miyamoto Saga}}

In the beginning of January 2009, Chris would be confronted by <s>[[Clyde Cash|a troll]]</s> [[Shigeru Miyamoto]], who would attempt to try to make his Sonichu game fantasy a reality. Chris's ineptitude and inability to do... well... anything other than be a lazy fuck resulted in horrible delays and stalls to the project's advancement. In the end, [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] shut down the entire project with a scathing letter. This trolling encounter would have Chris give trolls a Powerpoint project that talked in great length about [[Chris and his ego|himself]]... and very little about his game.

===Julie Saga===
[[Image:Juliesaga.jpg]]

{{main|Julie}}

In February 2009 to early March 2009, Chris's latest sweetheart would be Julie, who was in actuality a young troll named [[BlueSpike]]. In this brief time frame, BlueSpike would release the infamous [[sex tape]], force Chris to declare [[BILLY MAYS]] mayor of [[CWCville]] and destroy his second medallion by forcing him to stick it up his ass. However, BlueSpike's total and utter control over Chris would lead to a schism between trolls, leading to the creation of the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]] and this very wiki.

===Ivy Saga===
[[Image:Ivysaga.jpg]]

{{main|Ivy}}

In March 2009, Chris would meet and fall in love with Ivy, his then-latest sweetheart. His crush towards Ivy would lead Chris to create three special comics and two music videos, a practical [[semen|spurt]] of work that wouldn't be surpassed for awhile. The saga also revealed Chris at his [[I_am_devoted_to_My_Sweetest_Ivy|creepiest]] [[CWC's_Message_for_Ivy|yet]], scarring many trolls and CWC-watchers. The saga also resulted in a [[CWC's_¨It's_All_Coming_Back_To_Me¨|proposal of marriage]]. Despite the work spurt, the saga would come to an abrupt end thanks to a combination of troll interference from [[Joshua Martinez]] and interference from [[Bob Chandler]] and [[Rocky Shoemaker]].

===Liquid Chris Saga===
[[Image:Liquidsaga.jpg]]

{{main|Liquid Chris}}

In July 2009, the TRUE and HONEST Christan Weston Chandler would come forth after the other Chris would reveal himself as a troll in one video. The other Chris, [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], would challenge Chris to a sing-off, with the TRUE and HONEST CWC proving himself the victor in the end. The appearance of this other Chris would pressure the other into churning out more comics than he had before, currently heading for the completion of [[Sonichu 9]], something that many believed would never happen due to the interference of many trolls.

Later, Liquid would return to continue on his quest to get rid of this faker. In the process of this new entry to the saga, Ian and Chris would battle over the heart of Chris's true love [[Kacey]]. In the end, the real Chris would win out and marry Kacey, leaving Ian to be butthurt.

===CWCipedia Saga===
[[Image:The CWCipedia Saga.jpg]]

{{main|CWCipedia}}

In early June 2009, Chris was given the CWCipedia, a Wiki-styled web page, so that Chris can use it to upload his Sonichu comics, blog, and personal life to, safe from the trolls who instantly dive at his other web pages and hack them. It doubled as a source for the [[CWCki]] to draw many of Chris's latest failures from, making it his best friend and his worst enemy.

On 19 [[November 2009]], perhaps one of the greatest features the Wiki introduced was the [[Mailbag]], in which a dump of all [[Fans|fan]] emails sent to the admin's address could be answered by Chris, for all to see. This feature provided insight into how Chris responds to trolls through email about his views on, for example, homosexuality, GodJesus, autism, etc.

Since 23 November 2009, advertisements linking to porn sites, gay rights organizations, information on Asperger syndrome, and the [[Asperchu|Asperpedia]] took residence on the CWCipedia, paid for by trolls. Eventually, Alec, the creator of Asperchu, paid Jack Thaddeus to replace most, if not all, of the ads with ads for Asperpedia. Chris had [[Address_to_my_Cwcipedia_SysOp|complained]] [[ChrisChanSonichu_and_WikiSysop_correspondence|repeatedly]] to the SysOp of the Wiki about these ads, which would have paid for the site until the end of 2010, pending negotiations.<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:ChrisChanSonichu</ref> All of this had "stressed" Chris out to the point of uploading videos of himself screaming [[death threats]] upon the advertisers' heads, and creating a separate, stress free, ad-free front page.

This saga would lead to the site being shut down twice in a row, both due to copyright infringement, and would lead to the death of [[Simonla Rosechu]] in the most humiliating way - death by exploding toilet.

The Asperpedia team would continue to vandalize and hijack CWCipedia in a variety of ways until it finally collapsed in May, and Chris finally abandoned the site after already making numerous claims that he'd quit the internet forever. After Mao moved in to fill the void, he passed ownership to [[Alec]] and [[Vivian Gee]], wherein they took over the site and the rights to Sonichu to begin [[Sonichu Season 2]], where ultimately, on 26 [[June 2010]], the entire site would be terminated along with the entirety of the original 110mb server.

===Asperchu Saga===
[[Image:The Asperchu Saga.jpg]]

{{main|Asperchu}}

In late November 2009, an artist named Alec Benson Leary started a new series called Asperchu, starring the titular Electric Asperger's Hedgehog Pokemon. Chris had spent most of December ignoring Asperchu and its popularity before finally exploding with rage, claiming the series as nothing more than fan fiction and a parody. The popularity of Asperchu, combined with Chris's continuing downward spiral that is [[Sonichu 10]], has led many of Chris's fans to abandon Sonichu and go to Asperchu.

Most of the saga has been spent with Chris raging at not just Alec, but also [[Evan]], [[Fan:Moon-Pals|Sean]] and Asperpedia admin Mao over their usage of their characters and how they mock him. As well, Chris has been dealing with Evan over the usage of Simonla Rosechu, with Chris going so far as to deny reality and substitute it with his own.

In terms of productivity, it has given us Sonichu 10, which showcases Chris going all out in trying to get rid of everything he hates, including homosexuality and trolls. In that same book, Chris kills all four trolls involved in this saga as retaliation for making him kill Simonla Rosechu. As well, [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls|nine phone calls]] has been leaked. These phone calls show Alec attempting to get through to Chris and his way of thinking and Chris fighting tooth and nail not to change at all.

In the aftermath of the saga, Evan ceased his Simonchu comic, proud to have Simonla removed, Alec and Sean continued their respective comics and Mao continues to poke and jab at Chris. And while the saga has for the most part died down, Asperpedia continues to harass its rival CWCipedia, either by placing new ads, vandalizing it, or shutting it down altogether. One of the post-trial ads even precipitated Chris's falling out with [[Jackie e-mails|Jackie]].

===Surfshack Tito Saga===
[[Image:The Surfshack Tito Saga.jpg]]

{{Main|Surfshack Tito}}

Sometime in January 2010, Chris met and fell in love with a certain girl in real life, hoping she would be the one who'd end his streak of being a [[virgin with rage]]. On 9 March 2010, Chris would release a ''[[Little Big Planet]]'' video of a stage based off a book he was helping write with his gal-pal... and release a name in the process. Dedicated trolls used the information to discover the gal-pal's identity, but decided to let the [[lulz]] spread naturally. The next day, however, a troll revealed the information to the gal-pal, codenamed [[The Wallflower]], and while one set of lulz was stopped, another one was set into motion.

The troll, calling himself Surfshack Tito, claimed responsibility for not only hacking his PSN accounts for the umpteenth time, but also stealing the Wallflower from Chris. Chris, in response, has threatened to go all out and seemingly try to murder Tito, threatening him with a [[Pocket knife|pocket knife]], attacking him with [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|racial slurs]], and flashing his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|underwear]] in the process. At the same time, Chris has discovered and declared war on the CWCki, demanding that all pages involving himself, his friends and family be altered to suit his needs. In short order, Chris's attack on the CWCki fell utterly short.

The creativity here has been utterly stunted, especially after the Wallflower left him. He has gone on to blame his fans for wanting him to make more comics and compared them to the trolls that have tormented him. He has also vowed to leave the internet forever, though he ended up reshowing his face 36 hours after his vow...

=== The GAMe PLACe Saga ===
{{main|The GAMe PLACe|Michael Snyder}}

For a long time, Chris had been visiting The GAMe PLACe on a regular basis, dating as far back as before the Megan saga. It was here that Chris would meet Megan herself, as well as [[Lucas]] and [[Mimms]], two people who would deliver a number of intel over Chris during his time there. He also participated in the [[Pokemon TCG]] League, using his own poorly made decks. However, Chris was a pain to the store's manager, [[Michael Snyder]] and by August 2008, tired of Chris terrorizing various [[niggos|patrons]], yelling at children, bogarting the TV and all-around being a pain, Michael would finally ban Chris from the store, embarrassing him and his mother in the process. It wouldn't be the end, however.

On multiple occasions, Chris returned to the store despite Michael's insistence that he never come back. He tried emails, sneaking in, [[Apology to Game & Hobby Place|pleading]] on [[YouTube]], but nothing worked. The first time he attempted (unsuccessfully, of course) to lift his ban in person was with a prepared, [[Chris and remorse|faux-apologetic speech]]. When that failed, he stormed out angrily and called Michael a [[Chris and race|JEW]], then attempted to rally his "fanbase" and get them [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|to troll him]]. [[6 June 2010|The next occasion]] was much more disturbing. He claimed he was trying to take a picture of Michael for a dartboard, but was caught in the act and was chased in the parking lot. Nearly running over Michael and his daughter, eventually the [[Jerkops]] got involved, but they did not arrest him. Michael accused him of trying to take [[pedofork|pictures of his daughter]]. Whether it's true or not, it's [[Kacey|confirmed]] that Chris has stalker tendencies.

==Intermittent Sagas==

===The CWC Exile Saga===

{{main|Rocky Shoemaker|Fridays After Five|Flipnote Hatena}}

After Chris lost The Wallflower and fought with Surfshack Tito, an outside force attempted to push Chris away from the Internet. In no less than five times, Chris has boldly claimed that he has abandoned the Internet and smugly told his detractors that they should go outside and live their lives, advice Chris should have followed ''years'' ago. However, Chris still latched onto the Internet as much as he could, trying to find ways to sneak in without the force discovering him.

Trolls would end up discovering Chris dancing like a dying turkey at [[Fridays After Five]], then discover that he had set up shop at the [[Flipnote Hatena]], where he tried to spread his sick and twisted thoughts to younger, innocent people before being shut down. However, the thing that would finally bring Chris back to the Internet and end his exile would be [[The MovingForward videos|the destruction of his beloved Life Upgrade]]. At his own hands, no less!

==Post-exile==

===Jackie Saga===

{{main|Jackie}}
Following the fallout of the Wallflower incident, Chris pulled himself away from the Internet, only for him to meet and begin conversing to a woman named Jackie. Meeting her at [[The Hook Cafe]], the two began conversing through [[Jackie Emails|E-mails]], revealing the rationale in Chris's attempts to get back into the GAMe PLACe and showing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|he's still incredibly disturbing]]. However, Chris broke off his relationship with her after she attempted to get him to change his life for the better.

Amazingly, it seems that Jackie and Chris has attempted to try again with a relationship, showing even more [[Song for Jackie.MOV|disturbing videos]] in the process, possibly turning Jackie into the next [[Ivy]].

==The future==
If anything remains clear, it is that Chris is incapable of applying past events to current ones. Given this, it is likely that Chris will be enduring one saga or another until the day he dies.

==See also==
*''[[Excel Saga]]''

==References==
<references/>

[[Category:Trolling]]

THAT IS MY HOUSE

2010-08-30T19:44:57Z

Jerkop: /* The Green County Health Department responds */

'''THAT IS MY HOUSE''', aka '''ECV 00193''', is a DEAD SERIOUS video uploaded 27 [[August 2009]] in which [[Chris]] demands footage of his [[14 Branchland Court|house]] be removed from the [[Internet]], threatening to call in detectives and [[police]] even though no one has done anything to him.

Chris took down the video not too long afterward, only for it be re-uploaded by [[troll]] [[TheCWCvilleLibrary|archivists]]. On 29 August 2009, an uncut version of the video featuring [[Bob Chandler|Chris's father]] was acquired by [[Vivian Gee]] and [[PS3/How the PS3 is Hacked|leaked]] onto [[YouTube]].

Some will take note that this is Chris's greatest display of emotion to date. It seems that only when he runs the risk of punishment does he truly react.

==Description==

{{quotebox|I was Already In Deep Enough, but THIS IS TOO DEEP! GET ALL MY HOUSE IMAGES OFF THE INTERNET!

I am counting on ALL FULL Positive Cooperation in this major matter.

Christian Weston Chandler, August 17 [sic], 2009 }}

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}
{{Infobox/video
| name = THAT IS MY HOUSE
| video = {{#ev:youtube|70LvKzxeHOE}}
| stardate = 27 August 2009
| subject = {{Website|The Internet}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}
| shirt = {{GreenBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[Show_RESPECT_to_me,_"C"CWC| Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]
| next = [[THAT_IS_MY_HOUSE#Uncut| ECV 00192]]
}}

===Transcript===

''[Chris races into frame, VERY angry and upset]''

This does not even deserve a [[Captain's Log]] introduction, ''[dramatic [[glasses]] removal]'' BECAUSE this is DEAD SERIOUS. The [[Tour of Chris's house|inside and outside tour]] I did A FEW MONTHS ago of my house, everyone on the Internet...

''[Chris suddenly begins to scream in a fit of childish rage]''

'''''MY [[Barbara Chandler|MOTHER]] AND MY [[Bob Chandler|FATHER]]''' ARE '''ANGRY''' AT ME!'''''

'''THEY'RE BLAMING''' IT AT ME! '''IT'S MY FAULT, I ADMIT IT!''' IT'S MY FAULT; I WANT EVERYTHING A'''''BOUT MY HOUSE'''''

'''''OFF! THE! INTERNET!'''''

''[Chris starts gesticulating ridiculously]'' I'll send in detectives! I'll send in police! I'll send in EVERYTHING IN MY '''[[Power|POWER]]!'''

''[There is a noticeable jump-cut, as a result of a removed scene in which [[Bob Chandler]] enters and talks with Chris. Chris's glasses are back on his face and the door is left open from when Bob walked in. See the Uncut version below]''

So yeah, please, get everything off the Internet...

{{RageQuote|NowNOWNOW''NOWNOW
'''NOWWWWWW!'''''}}
''[Chris stomps the ground as he yells, the camera noticably shakes]''

''[He quickly calms down then holds up peace sign]''

[[Curse ye ha me ha|Curse]] the [[trolls]], peace to everyone else.

==Uncut==

{{quote|Shut that goddamn thing off!|Bob Chandler, addressing his old foe: that ''goddamn Internet''}}

An uncut version aka '''ECV 00192''' was posted by [[Vivian Gee]] on 29 August 2009, where [[Bob Chandler]] walks in and scolds Chris. This is the second, and hopefully not the last time we see, or hear, Bob showing any kind of parental authority over Chris.

We also learn the real reason why Chris's parents are concerned about the tour videos: the fear that the [http://www.vdh.state.va.us/LHD/ThomasJefferson/Greene/ Health Department of Greene County] will discover the squalor of the [[14 Branchland Court|Chandler Household]] and condemn it.

Also noteworthy is the fact that this marks the first Chris video explicitly featuring another living, breathing person (as opposed to [[Kimmi|an inflatable person, made of plastic]]).

===Video===

{{Tardrage}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00192
| image = {{#ev:youtube|UJbjb47nEfY}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 29 August 2009
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] Rage
| Shirt = [[Image:Greenblacktrim.png]] Green with Black Trim
| previous = [[THAT_IS_MY_HOUSE| THAT IS MY HOUSE]]
| next = [[Bless_the_Fans,_Curse_the_Trolls| Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls]]
}} </center>

====Transcript====

''[At 0:28, [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] opens the door and walks in]''

'''Chris''': ...THAT-- GET IT '''OFF''' THE INNERNET...

'''Bob''': Listen-to-me! ''[muffled by CWC's "OFF THE INTERNET!"]'' Listen to me.

'''Chris''': ''[his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|expression changes rapidly]] and slowly turns to face Bob]'' Yes...

'''Bob''': Listen to '''ME'''.

'''Chris''': Yes.

'''Bob''': Shut that goddamn thing off! [walks over to Chris, as he turns off his [[PS3|PSEye]]] I don't care what you do. ''[pointing at PSEye]'' You get all that stuff off of there. Tonight.

'''Chris''': I'm working on it. ''[slaps hands to his side]''

'''Bob''': Go work on it! ''[points to the door, instructing Chris to go to the computer downstairs]''

'''Chris''': I am working--

'''Bob''': Do you ''realize''? Do. ''you''. '''realize''' something? Let me tell you: If the [http://www.vdh.state.va.us/LHD/ThomasJefferson/Greene/ Health Department of Greene County] sees those videos, that you put on the damn internet, they could condemn our house, and we would have to move out of it.

'''Chris''':'' [sighs]'' I see.

'''Bob''': You go get that goddamn stuff off of there and fast.

'''Chris''': I'm woorking on it! I was making a YouTube vi--uh, a vid-dya for YouTube t-tellin' ev'rybody, "Get the images off of the Internet". Y'know it's not...

'''Bob''': Nooo...

'''Chris''': Its--It's, ahh, ''out of my control'' ''[flails arms]''

'''Bob''': No, '''you''' get 'em off.

'''Chris''': It's out of my control! I don't know where to go! ''I DUNNO KNOW WHERE TA GO!''

'''Bob''': Yooou loaded them up there, you unload 'em!

'''Chris''': I'm working on it!

'''Bob''': Go do ''it!''

'''Chris''': ''I AM WORK'-- I AM DOIN' IT... I'M STARTIN'...

'''Bob''': GGet in ''here'' and do ''it''!

'''Chris''': I--''[sputters]''

'''Bob''': ''[walks out of the room]'' I'll be up all night with you if ''I have to''. You won't get any sleep until that stuff's off.

'''Chris''': I'll working on it!

'''Bob''': ''[from outside]'' Git in there and staart!

'''Chris''': ''III'M. WOR-KIN'. ON IT! LET ME DO THAT STUPID VIDEO SO I CAN TELL [[Trolls|E'RRYBODY]], [[True_and_Loyal_Fanbase|IN MY COMMAND]], TO GET EVERYTHIN'-- HELP ME GET EVERYTHIN' OFF THE INTERNET!'--'

'''Bob''': ''[interrupting]'' Listennn,

'''Chris''': --about our house!

'''Bob''': I don't wanna get kicked outta ''my'' house. By the Health Department. And what you just did was stick a knife in our back, and kill us! ''[Bob exits the room again]''

'''Chris''': Aw'right... lemme just...

'''Bob''': Get that ''stuff'' OFFA THERE...

'''Chris''': '''I'M ''WOORK'''''--

'''Bob''': ...and get it offa there fast!

'''Chris''': I'm WORKIN' on it! I'm ''WORKIN' '' on it!'' [Chris appears to resume recording footage for his video]''

''[Cut footage ends at 2:11, continuing into NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOWWWWW]''

==The Greene County Health Department responds==

In addition to creating many, many mirrors of the videos Bob wanted cut down, some more intrepid viewers actually did contact the Greene County Health Department. The Health Department did respond (3 weeks later) to one such letter, although they seemed indifferent and stated the Chandler's decision to live in a garbage house full of dirty dishes and animal feces was part of their inalienable rights as guaranteed by the US Constitution:

{{quotebox|Dear Bob S:

Thank you for your interest in this situation. The challenge is to
clarify if the conditions at this residence are a risk to the public's
health or if they are personal risks accepted by the individuals that
choose to live there.

Public Health relates to the general health of a community. When
diseases can be transmitted from person to person or when the health
risk affects the community, regulations have normally been enacted to
address these public health threats. Even so, the individual's right to
choose is protected by the Constitution. We know smoking greatly
increases the risk of cancer and heart disease, yet individuals continue
to choose to smoke. Regulations are in place to minimize public exposure
to contaminated or mishandled foods, yet some individuals still choose
to eat raw hamburger. In the case you've brought to our attention, the
"deplorable conditions" you refer to appear to be confined to the
individual residence and are the choice of those that live there. They
do not appear to effect the health of the community. There are no
specific health regulations that address individual choices in private
living conditions.

We have contacted the building official to see if any building, zoning
of fire prevention laws apply and were informed that they did not. We
also contacted the Greene County Attorney to see if he knew of any
County ordinances that would be applicable. He did not know of any. We
also contacted adult protective services to make sure they are aware of
the situation.

Please contact me if I can be of further assistance.

Jeffrey T. McDaniel 
Environmental Health Manager 
[http://www.vdh.state.va.us/LHD/thomasjefferson/ Thomas Jefferson Health District]}}

==Current state of the Chandler household==

In [[Mailbag 25]] Chris revealed that he lied to his Father, telling him that he had gotten the house vids off of the internet. While there is little chance of the Chandler pig sty actually being condemned we can expect a shitstorm very soon. The next time Chris misses a few days in a row of his comic, it may be because Bob learned the house vids were still up and cut down the internet.

==Remixes==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = NOW MIX
| video = {{#ev:youtube|euiWcvwoON8}}
| Stardate = 27 August 2009
| Maker = [[Vivian]]
| Subject =
| Video Type = Remix
| Other Info = [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JuVHCJVYf4 The original song]
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = "That's My House!" - Ca. 1912 Silent Film Starring Christian and Robert Chandler
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ENSKi4_mO3A}}
| Stardate = 27 August 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tregnier279 tregnier279]
| Subject =
| Video Type = Remix
| Other Info = [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENSKi4_mO3A The original video]
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = CWC-Tok (Presented to You by Christian Weston Chandler)
| video = {{#ev:youtube|7V1gEjtmm9M}}
| Stardate = 09 January 2010
| Maker = [[Liquid Chris]]
| Subject =
| Video Type = Remix
}}

==See also==

*[[Bob Walks In]]
*[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]
*[[Tour of Chris's House]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]|nextlink=[[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls]]|}}

{{Troll Videos}}
{{LeakedVideos}}

[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Template:LeakedVideos

2010-08-30T19:41:16Z

Jerkop:

{| id="toc" width="70%" style="text-align:Left; clear:both;" align=center
|- style="background:#ccccff" align="center" width="95%"
| '''Leaked Videos'''
|-
| style="font-size:11px;" |

<center>
[[For Julie's Eyes Only]] |
[[ACWCAudition]] |
[[April 16 Fetish Vids|Fetish Vids]] |
[[Power]] |
[[CWCFlyingElephants]] |
[[Chris_humps_his_PS3|Chris Humps His PS3]] |
[[THAT IS MY HOUSE#Uncut|THAT IS MY HOUSE (Director's Cut)]] |
[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV‎|For J-R's Eyes Only]] |
[[The MovingFoward videos]] |
[[ItIsFinished.MOV|It Is Finished]]
</center>
|}

[[Category:Leaked videos]]

Stardate, August 27, 2010

2010-08-28T02:51:58Z

Jerkop:

'''Stardate, August 27, 2010''' is a video in which [[Chris]] claims that he formatted his [[PS3]]'s hard drive, unexpectedly erasing [[List of Chris's PSN video downloads|all]] [[Monthly tugboat|his]] [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads|content]]. Having learned about the true meaning of formatting and effectively destroying the most important aspect of his life, Chris concedes victory to the [[trolls]]. However, knowing Chris, it is also highly probable that he is [[Lies|lying]] in order to keep trolls away from his PS3.

Chris deleted this video a few hours later.

== Video ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Stardate, August 27, 2010
| video = {{#ev:youtube|O4Ix46Cfdq4}}
| stardate = 27 August 2010
| subject = {{Video games|text}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Tragedy|text}},
| saga =
| shirt = {{HighSchoolShirt|text}}
| previous = [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW]]
| next = Current
}}

== Transcript ==
Heh... [[Captain's log]], Stardate August 27, 2010.

Guess what? I have some interesting, fascinating news for you... trolls out there. You knome- You are aware of my recent dilemma with being able to download videos and digital comics being disabled. Well, I just got done through talking with, uhh, technical people at [[Sony]]. And they encourage me to, uhh, to, uhh, option 3 of, uhh, res- of, uhh, searching for corrupted data and cleaning that out.

But there was a problem during that and... it's- and the 'sistant suggested formatting my internal hard drive. And there was a misunderstanding between me... and... the, uhh, employee over at Sony Computer Entertainment of [[America]]. And I said yes, [eyes bulge out] everything I have [[Monthly tugboat|worked for]] since... ss- two- since [[March 2007]] since I started, saved data, videos, music, photographs everything that was saved to my hard drive. [''Extends arms out showing the world his [[stare]]''.] Gone!

There's nothing to destroy. You wanted to destroy my PlayStation 3? Well, in a misguided error, [[Slow-in-the-minds|I just did myself]]. So there's nothing for you trolls to be [[Chris and his Ego|jealous]] about, nothing, absolutely nothing! Feels like a whole [[Obesity|weight]] has been lifted off my shoulders. In a way, you win! You win dayure!

That's it! I'll leave y'all with that piece of knowledge, let y'all contemplate. Of uhh, especially to uhh, [[Clyde Cash]]... Let him contemplate... the agony in the past few years. Everything, [''raises arms''] [[Homos|POOF]]!

Alright, stay safe. [''Reaches for camera to turn off.'']

== See also ==
*[[PS3]]
*[[Sony]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW]]|nextlink=Current}}

{{Troll Videos}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Sonichu 11

2010-07-23T02:50:59Z

Jerkop: /* The 24 April episodes */

{{Infobox/Comic
| titleandissue = Sonichu #11
| cover = [[Image:Issue 11 Cover.jpg|150px]]
| coverdate = 13 August 2009
| finishedcomic = ''incomplete''
| pagecount = 12 (so far)
| Episodes = 22
| previous = [[Sonichu 10|Sonichu #10]]
| next = [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]]
}}
{{Unfinished}}
{{quote|The reboot will happen in Book 11 with the Clip Show Episode; most questions will be answered and plots revealed.|[[Mailbag 51]]}}
'''''Sonichu 11''''' is the 12th comic in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comic series]], dated 13 [[August 2009]]. The cover claims to be the 10th anniversary issue. (TEN YEARS WITHOUT A CEASE AND DESIST LETTER FROM NINTENDO AND SEGA!) However, since the 10th anniversary of Sonichu's creation came and went on March 17, 2010 and this issue remains incomplete, this is now another thing Chris has [[fail|failed]] at.

[[Chris]] began writing this issue while Issue 10 was also in production, apparently to have somewhere to put the comic version of [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]. Christmas 2009 came and went, and Chris apparently forgot about this unfinished story with 8 pages to go. In the meantime, he was still engrossed in tracing shit for his epic battle with [[Reldnahc]] and the anti-[[gay]] vaccine from the future.

==A Sonichu Christmas==
{{Resources
| title = Christian Chandler in Director Amenities
| cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11 ''Special Episode 1 of Book 11''}}
[[Image:Virginmary.jpg|thumb|Take that, separation of church and state! Also: child molestation.]]
[[Image:Thisemotionyoucallwuvconfusesandinfuriatesus.jpg|thumb|She's addressing Chris.]]
[[Image:Sonichu 11 Teaser.jpg|thumb|[[Alec Benson Leary]]'s rendition.]]
In [[December 2009]], in response to requests for a Sonichu Christmas special, Chris began to create a comic adaptation of Christmas Story, at the same time as he was working on the original prose version of the story. This marks the second time that Chris's [[Chris and writing|prose]] was adapted into comic form - the short story "[[Sonichu & Rosechu… The Genesis of the Lovehogs]]" served as the basis for episodes 1 and 2 in [[Sonichu 0]].

The comic opens to show the Sonichu family in various states of celebration for the Christmas season, with the house decorated for the holiday. For a wintertime scene, the lawn of 14 Brunchland Lane is impossibly green, while a bike is left out along the side of the house awaiting permanent rusting from the events to follow. This is because Chris [[Scrapbook of Fail|reused]] the [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/images/2/27/SchuComic9P34.jpg original 14 Brunchland Lane picture] seen in [[Sonichu 9]] with a half-assed Photoshopping of the clouds and sky to a dark blue color to reflect the nighttime, the removal of [[Reldnahc]] running down the road, and the addition of poorly-rendered Christmas lights and a wreath onto the house. Chris believes toddlers can do a lot, as Cera, Christine and Robbie hang stockings, rehearse for the overtly Christian school play, and help bake cookies. At least one of them appears to be in elementary school, so Chris likely forgot how old they were supposed to be.

Christine notably plagiarizes a joke from ''[[Family Guy]]'', marking the second time Chris has stolen a ''Family Guy'' joke since [[Sonichu 8]], only this time instead of screwing up the context of the joke he manages to make the already off-color gag (that suggested Jesus's mother wasn't a virgin) more offensive, as it is being uttered by a child who intends to say it at her school play, likely leading to loud gasps, boos, and an expulsion. The scene takes focus on Sonichu and Robbie hanging stockings, Robbie proceeds to butcher a quote from a Holiday classic and they than have a long, boring conversation about what toys Robbie wants, the conversation finally ends with Sonichu giving a diabetes inducing speech about his kids.

Meanwhile Rosechu and Cera make an abnormally small amount of cookies, so that each child is apparently allotted one cookie in an individual plastic bag. Cera makes a big deal about making a special cookie for a Jewish kid in an uncomfortably awkward attempt at sensitivity. The cookie is vanilla flavored, in case the Jewish kid has some kind of food allergy. Rosechu and Cera do not consider that anyone other than Jews might have food allergies. Cera says "I wuv you!" while facing away from her mother and directly at the reader, apparently breaking the fourth wall. Chris really wants more people to love him unconditionally for being special. Robbie and Cera, speaking in complete sentences despite being toddlers, notice that it has snowed, with two feet expected to fall. Sonichu and Rosechu have a long conversation about purchasing groceries for "a few days."

While Sonichu goes to the supermarket, Christine recites [[Wikipedia:Magnificat|Luke 1:45 - 55]] (which Chris types as Luke 14.5 - 55) while Rosechu watches and the children stare on with their soulless green eyes. Incidentally, this Bible verse mentions how GodJesus will reward the humble and [[Chris and his Ego|punish the proud and the mighty]]. While this verse is commonly heard in Protestant churches, there's no way that any public school in the 21st century could get away with anything this overtly religious without fear of legal reprisal. Later, Sonichu returns home with groceries. His trip to the supermarket was uneventful and uninteresting.

The next morning, Sonichu and Rosechu sit in the kitchen drinking coffee. A [[KCWC]] announcer details CWCville school closings, and Sonichu expresses his anticipated enjoyment of a day spent with his family, hot [[tobacky|"coca"]] and a warm [[Axe|shower]]. Rosechu subsequently nags him to clear the snow burying their palatial residence, so Sonichu "bundles up for work." Noticing that all doors and windows are barred by mounds of frozen precipitate, Sonichu decides to demonstrate his unholy powers to his children. "Imitating Santa", Sonichu crouches in the chimney, touches his nose, and with a cry of [[Mary Poppins|"Chim Chim Cheroo"]] flies up the flue.

He rises up out of the chimney looking like a [[niggos|ninja]] because of the soot, and then shakes it off. He then bizarrely uses his gift of sonic speed...
 ...to spend five minutes 'shoveling' the driveway while in his sonic mode, because using an actual shovel is too much [[Monthly tugboat|work]]; never mind that the light and fluffy snow he's moving will be blown towards a busy road and cause a [[Chris and death|tragic accident]]. Exhausted, he then heads back into the house for [[Chris and health#Hygiene|a shower]] making a sound as if he's [[Mass debating|pleasing himself]] while Rosechu looks on holding a hideous novelty Christmas towel as she blesses him.

==The 24 April episodes==
On 24 [[April 2010]], the Sysop uploaded two new episodes from Sonichu 11 to the CWCipedia. These stories picked up where Sonichu 10 left off with a similar dark and downbeat tone: [[Bubbles]] and [[Angelica]] were killed in the bombing of the CWCville Mal-Wart, [[Sandy Rosechu]] was run over by an inattentive driver, [[Wild]] committed suicide in a fit of grief and rage, [[Christine]] and [[Robbie]] were killed and [[Cerah]] badly injured when the three of them drank drain cleaner, [[Rosechu]] smothered her permanently crippled daughter with a pillow, [[Sonichu]] demanded a divorce, and [[Reginald Sneasel]] decided to show the world his "seven-inch lightning rod."

Despite a surprisingly positive fan response to the new pages, Chris overwrote them a short while later, claiming in a rage-filled [[CWC Blog]] update that they were the work of another artist.

However, during The Great Rampage 2.0 (where CWCipedia was hacked for the 2nd time), the pages were restored. But the next day, the pages were deleted again when the CWCipedia died for the final time.

==External links==
* [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_1 Sonichu #11]
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?duyz0z2gyd2 Sysop's not TRUE and HONEST version of pages 13-38]

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Sonichu comic book issues]]

Sonichu 11

2010-07-23T02:49:15Z

Jerkop:

{{Infobox/Comic
| titleandissue = Sonichu #11
| cover = [[Image:Issue 11 Cover.jpg|150px]]
| coverdate = 13 August 2009
| finishedcomic = ''incomplete''
| pagecount = 12 (so far)
| Episodes = 22
| previous = [[Sonichu 10|Sonichu #10]]
| next = [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]]
}}
{{Unfinished}}
{{quote|The reboot will happen in Book 11 with the Clip Show Episode; most questions will be answered and plots revealed.|[[Mailbag 51]]}}
'''''Sonichu 11''''' is the 12th comic in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comic series]], dated 13 [[August 2009]]. The cover claims to be the 10th anniversary issue. (TEN YEARS WITHOUT A CEASE AND DESIST LETTER FROM NINTENDO AND SEGA!) However, since the 10th anniversary of Sonichu's creation came and went on March 17, 2010 and this issue remains incomplete, this is now another thing Chris has [[fail|failed]] at.

[[Chris]] began writing this issue while Issue 10 was also in production, apparently to have somewhere to put the comic version of [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]. Christmas 2009 came and went, and Chris apparently forgot about this unfinished story with 8 pages to go. In the meantime, he was still engrossed in tracing shit for his epic battle with [[Reldnahc]] and the anti-[[gay]] vaccine from the future.

==A Sonichu Christmas==
{{Resources
| title = Christian Chandler in Director Amenities
| cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11 ''Special Episode 1 of Book 11''}}
[[Image:Virginmary.jpg|thumb|Take that, separation of church and state! Also: child molestation.]]
[[Image:Thisemotionyoucallwuvconfusesandinfuriatesus.jpg|thumb|She's addressing Chris.]]
[[Image:Sonichu 11 Teaser.jpg|thumb|[[Alec Benson Leary]]'s rendition.]]
In [[December 2009]], in response to requests for a Sonichu Christmas special, Chris began to create a comic adaptation of Christmas Story, at the same time as he was working on the original prose version of the story. This marks the second time that Chris's [[Chris and writing|prose]] was adapted into comic form - the short story "[[Sonichu & Rosechu… The Genesis of the Lovehogs]]" served as the basis for episodes 1 and 2 in [[Sonichu 0]].

The comic opens to show the Sonichu family in various states of celebration for the Christmas season, with the house decorated for the holiday. For a wintertime scene, the lawn of 14 Brunchland Lane is impossibly green, while a bike is left out along the side of the house awaiting permanent rusting from the events to follow. This is because Chris [[Scrapbook of Fail|reused]] the [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/images/2/27/SchuComic9P34.jpg original 14 Brunchland Lane picture] seen in [[Sonichu 9]] with a half-assed Photoshopping of the clouds and sky to a dark blue color to reflect the nighttime, the removal of [[Reldnahc]] running down the road, and the addition of poorly-rendered Christmas lights and a wreath onto the house. Chris believes toddlers can do a lot, as Cera, Christine and Robbie hang stockings, rehearse for the overtly Christian school play, and help bake cookies. At least one of them appears to be in elementary school, so Chris likely forgot how old they were supposed to be.

Christine notably plagiarizes a joke from ''[[Family Guy]]'', marking the second time Chris has stolen a ''Family Guy'' joke since [[Sonichu 8]], only this time instead of screwing up the context of the joke he manages to make the already off-color gag (that suggested Jesus's mother wasn't a virgin) more offensive, as it is being uttered by a child who intends to say it at her school play, likely leading to loud gasps, boos, and an expulsion. The scene takes focus on Sonichu and Robbie hanging stockings, Robbie proceeds to butcher a quote from a Holiday classic and they than have a long, boring conversation about what toys Robbie wants, the conversation finally ends with Sonichu giving a diabetes inducing speech about his kids.

Meanwhile Rosechu and Cera make an abnormally small amount of cookies, so that each child is apparently allotted one cookie in an individual plastic bag. Cera makes a big deal about making a special cookie for a Jewish kid in an uncomfortably awkward attempt at sensitivity. The cookie is vanilla flavored, in case the Jewish kid has some kind of food allergy. Rosechu and Cera do not consider that anyone other than Jews might have food allergies. Cera says "I wuv you!" while facing away from her mother and directly at the reader, apparently breaking the fourth wall. Chris really wants more people to love him unconditionally for being special. Robbie and Cera, speaking in complete sentences despite being toddlers, notice that it has snowed, with two feet expected to fall. Sonichu and Rosechu have a long conversation about purchasing groceries for "a few days."

While Sonichu goes to the supermarket, Christine recites [[Wikipedia:Magnificat|Luke 1:45 - 55]] (which Chris types as Luke 14.5 - 55) while Rosechu watches and the children stare on with their soulless green eyes. Incidentally, this Bible verse mentions how GodJesus will reward the humble and [[Chris and his Ego|punish the proud and the mighty]]. While this verse is commonly heard in Protestant churches, there's no way that any public school in the 21st century could get away with anything this overtly religious without fear of legal reprisal. Later, Sonichu returns home with groceries. His trip to the supermarket was uneventful and uninteresting.

The next morning, Sonichu and Rosechu sit in the kitchen drinking coffee. A [[KCWC]] announcer details CWCville school closings, and Sonichu expresses his anticipated enjoyment of a day spent with his family, hot [[tobacky|"coca"]] and a warm [[Axe|shower]]. Rosechu subsequently nags him to clear the snow burying their palatial residence, so Sonichu "bundles up for work." Noticing that all doors and windows are barred by mounds of frozen precipitate, Sonichu decides to demonstrate his unholy powers to his children. "Imitating Santa", Sonichu crouches in the chimney, touches his nose, and with a cry of [[Mary Poppins|"Chim Chim Cheroo"]] flies up the flue.

He rises up out of the chimney looking like a [[niggos|ninja]] because of the soot, and then shakes it off. He then bizarrely uses his gift of sonic speed...
 ...to spend five minutes 'shoveling' the driveway while in his sonic mode, because using an actual shovel is too much [[Monthly tugboat|work]]; never mind that the light and fluffy snow he's moving will be blown towards a busy road and cause a [[Chris and death|tragic accident]]. Exhausted, he then heads back into the house for [[Chris and health#Hygiene|a shower]] making a sound as if he's [[Mass debating|pleasing himself]] while Rosechu looks on holding a hideous novelty Christmas towel as she blesses him.

==The 24 April episodes==
On 24 [[April 2010]], the Sysop uploaded two new episodes from Sonichu 11 to the CWCipedia. These stories picked up where Sonichu 10 left off with a similar dark and downbeat tone: [[Bubbles]] and [[Angelica]] were killed in the bombing of the CWCville Mal-Wart, [[Sandy Rosechu]] was run over by an inattentive driver, [[Wild]] committed suicide in a fit of grief and rage, [[Christine]] and [[Robbie]] were killed and [[Cerah]] badly injured when the three of them drank drain cleaner, [[Rosechu]] smothered her permanently crippled daughter with a pillow, [[Sonichu]] demanded a divorce, and [[Reginald Sneasel]] decided to show the world his "seven-inch lightning rod."

Despite a surprisingly positive fan response to the new pages, Chris overwrote them a short while later, claiming in a rage-filled [[CWC Blog]] update that they were the work of another artist.

However, during The Great Rampage 2.0 (where CWCipedia was hacked for the 2nd time), the pages were restored. But the next day, the pages were deleted again when the CWCipedia died for the final time.

The pages are currently available on the newly revived CWCipedia, courtesy of Mao.

==External links==
* [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_1 Sonichu #11]
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?duyz0z2gyd2 Sysop's not TRUE and HONEST version of pages 13-38]

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Sonichu comic book issues]]

Sonichu 8

2010-07-23T02:36:52Z

Jerkop: /* Links */ removing dead, useless links

{{Infobox/Comic
| titleandissue = Sonichu #8
| cover = [[Image:Sonichu8.jpg|150px]]
| coverdate = 20 August 2008
| finishedcomic = 1 January 2009
| pagecount = 101
| episodes = 17-18
| sub-episodes = 3
| previous = [[Sonichu 7|Sonichu #7]]
| next = [[Sonichu 9|Sonichu #9]]
}}{{Honest}} 

'''''Sonichu 8''''' is the ninth comic in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comic series]]. Based on the cover, this was originally planned as a Rosechu Spring Break special, featuring both [[Blanca Weiss]] and her character Jiggliami as introduced in Sonichu #7. However, by August 2008, Chris's focus was entirely on the [[trolls]], and that greatly altered the shape of this issue.

Chris unveiled Episode 17 in September 2008 without having first completed the entire issue, in a break from the established tradition. Rather than featuring a Spring Break story, Episode 17 presents a story of Sonichu and Rosechu fucking until they discover slanderous mislabelings on a website called [[4-cent_garbage]], whereupon Rosechu poses for nude photos of herself to prove that she doesn't have a penis. When Sonichu and Rosechu visit the 4-cent_garbage headquarters to confront the trolls, they are accosted by uncounted lurid images before meeting the wicked [[Jason Kendrick Howell]]. Howell refuses their demands and kicks Sonichu's ass easily; then Rosechu strips nude for the third time and shoves her pussy in Howell's face. The purpose of this story is unclear beyond Chris's need to express his incomprehensible feelings about the world around him.

In the end, the long-awaited Spring Break story would appear as Episode 18, although it would not be completed for several more months following Blanca's betrayal of Chris, his subsequent depression, and the massive distraction provided by playing [[LittleBigPlanet]]. Chris would not return to work on the comic until he was told of a boy named [[Ryan]] who, despairing of ever seeing his beloved Sonichu comics again, committed suicide. Ryan's tragic story, and the sadness of his mourning brother [[Clyde Cash]], prompted Chris to redouble his efforts, and Rosechu finally got to go on Spring Break in the dead of winter. (Fun fact: Chris has never gone on Spring Break, has no interest in any of the activities that go on during Spring Break (with the exception of sex), and will never actually know what it's like.)

Sonichu #8 proved to be highly controversial, primarily due to the hardcore sex scenes between Sonichu and Rosechu, who had previously been described as being 16 and 15, respectively. Chris rushed to include scenes in this issue that would firmly establish both characters as being of legal age to avoid accusations of child pornography.

==Development==
A few months prior to episode 18, several plot points were leaked in [[Chris Sex Logs|audio conversations]] Chris had with his then-sweetheart.
{{-}}
==Public Service Announcement==
Before the prologue, Chris has a disclaimer where [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] explain the morals of safe sex education. A horrifying sex scene was cut out.

[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|right|thumb|The disclaimer, as it appeared originally.]]

==Episode 17: Prologue==
{{Resources
| title = Prologue
| cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_8/Page_1 ''Episode 17''
| videobook =Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook#Episode_17{{!}}''Episode 17''
| sonichusite =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchuComic9TVY7P1.htm ''Episode 17''
| audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPMu06016Sc ''Episode 17''}}

The story opens with random proclamations from Chris:

*Sonichu turned 19 on March 17, [[2007]].
*Rosechu turned 18 on December 22, [[2006]].
*As of November 3, 2007, the pair have been living in a house in the suburbs of [[CWCville]]. The house has been fully paid for with [[Monthly tugboat|taxpayer dollars]] (although new Mayor [[BILLY MAYS]] may revise this item in the CWCville budget to fund smoking and drinking laws.).

Worth noting is that Sonichu and Rosechu's house is yellow and pink, just like its occupants.

Inside, Sonichu shows off his bare ass to the reader, while Rosechu emerges from the bathroom in pink lingerie. The pair engage in disgusting pre-coital banter, which may even be post-coital, since Rosechu suggests they just got done showering together. We also learn that Sonichu has a seven-inch cock, and requires "double-extra length" condoms for safe sex.

The two filthy, subhuman monsters engage in what they call "Missionary Cowgirl", apparently unaware that these are two completely different sexual positions.

In an illusory moment of mercy, Chris interrupts the action to discuss the nature of Sonichu and Rosechu's reproductive organs. In fact, the reader is subjected to a new kind of horror, as Chris clumsily attempts to explain how naked cartoon characters can have tits and balls. For the most part, Sonichu/Rosechu biology is a sick parody of human anatomy, with the following key distinctions:

*A Rosechu's vagina or "[[china]]" is normally hidden from view by some hideous flap of skin, which recedes during urination, sexual arousal, or a "[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|psych-up]]" attack.

*Rosechu nipples appear only when aroused, "for sensual massage". This would mean that Rosechus can only nurse their young when horny.

*Rosechus possess a "V-shaped pouch" behind their vaginal opening, which apparently serves the same function as a human uterus.

*A Sonichu's penis and testicles reside entirely within its abdominal cavity. While the testicles are permanently contained behind a "bone-like structure" for protection, the penis can emerge for urination or intercourse when the Sonichu leans forward, causing the erect penis to "slide out" purely by gravitational force. This presumably means Sonichu must be erect in order to urinate.

*Sex may be painful for Rosechu the first time, even causing her to bleed from her hymen, but it soon begins to feel like "a sensual massage".

*Sexually transmitted diseases are unheard of in the Sonichu/Rosechu population, which makes sense, given that there's fewer than twenty of the little freaks, and most of them were created abiogenetically.

*If impregnated, the resulting zygote is gestated within the mother Rosechu for "a few months", after which the Rosechu deposits an egg outside of her body, and must keep it warm until the infant [[Sonee]] or [[Rosey]] hatches. This reveals that all Rosechus are monotremes (freak-of-nature mammals that lay eggs).

Chris also declares that "most" STDs can be treated and removed, although it is unclear if he is referring to human STDs or bug-eyed furfag STDs. He refers the readers to local libraries and the internet for more information, and then returns to the hideous yiffing scene in the Sonichu household.

Chris treats the readers to a cock-eye view of Sonichu's penis falling out of his pelvis. As they sixty-nine each other, Rosechu emits disgusting blue fumes from her ungodly orifice, which Sonichu appears to savor. Sonichu finally penetrates Rosechu with his sickening yellow member, and Chris depicts numerous scenes of past intercourse between the two wretched creatures. Grasping Rosechu's tail, Sonichu pounds away at Rosechu's gaping hole, until the two finally reach orgasm simultaneously.

==Episode 17: "Rage Against the Garbage"==
{{Resources
| title = Rage Against the Garbage
| cwcipedia =http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_8/Page_3 ''Episode 17''
| videobook =Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook#Episode_17{{!}}''Episode 17''
| sonichusite =http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic9P1.htm ''Episode 17''
| audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPMu06016Sc ''Episode 17''}}
[[Image:Chris and Rule 34.jpg|thumb|300px|right|"[[Chris and art|They look so life-like.]]"]]
12 hours later, Sonichu seeks out even more putrid beast-sex from his sow, but Rosechu is too engrossed in her discovery of a website called [[4-cent_garbage.com]], which slanders the good names of not only Sonichu and Rosechu, but their father [[Christian Weston Chandler]] as well. Rosechu shows Sonichu various drawings of them and their friends (in fact, the [[Rule 34]] images Chris himself uploaded to [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]), and Sonichu <s>humorously</s> mistakes them for photographs.

Rosechu goes on to show him the "apex" of the site, referring to numerous drawings of herself with male genitalia. Overcome with nausea, Sonichu vomits. Unable to distinguish fantasy from reality, Sonichu insists that Rosechu is female, and cites her photoshoot in "PokeBoy" magazine as proof of her gender. Thinking that the dickgirl pictures were created by mistake rather than malice, Sonichu suggests they "prove" Rosechu's womanhood to 4-cent_garbage's staff in person. He nearly faints with weakness, and Rosechu puts him to bed to sleep off the trauma of seeing cartoon penises on the internet.

Incensed, Rosechu decides to retaliate by producing her own amateur photoshoot and uploading it to 4-cent_garbage.com to balance out the dickgirl artwork. Her efforts are fruitless, however, as even more Rosechu-with-penis drawings are uploaded all the time. Rosechu decides to consult Bubbles and Angelica for help.

At 1:45 that afternoon, Sonichu, Rosechu, and [[Wild Sonichu]] are teleported to the 4-cent_garbage Building in Clarksville, Tennessee, courtesy of [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]]. While Rosechu seeks to confront the [[Jason Kendrick Howell|head of the company]] and protest the website, Wild has been tasked with locating one of the [[Sonichu Balls]], which Magi-Chan detected inside (likely in some feeble attempt to tie this story into the overall plot). While Sonichu contacted the mysterious head of the company to make their appointment, the only name given was "Jason". In a pathetic attempt at subtlety, Chris depicts [[Thurston Howell III]] and his wife walking down the street to hint at Jason's full name.

For no reason whatsoever, Wild expounds upon his childhood, telling some shitty story about how his father, a Scyther, was captured by poachers in the jungle. He makes clear that he intends to avenge his father's death, even though he hasn't done a damn thing about it since the comic started. Wild turns invisible (a skill he learned from a Porygon), and slips into the building.

Sonichu and Rosechu enter through the main door, and find a [[Beel|demonic receptionist]] in the hellish atrium of the building. He rudely directs Sonichu to the 72nd floor (66+6). In the elevator, Sonichu angrily whines about the receptionist, until Rosechu reminds him of the [[story of Joseph]], and its moral of forgiveness.

===The Elevator Gags===
[[Image:SchuRchuReactions1.jpg|thumb|Planning? In MY ''Sonichu''? It's less likely than you think.]]
{{quote|You'll be seeing the following images AGAIN Soon Enough. |Christian Weston Chandler, on the images he put on his ED user page, which would later be used in Sonichu #8}}

As Sonichu and his pink cumdumpster ascend the building in the elevator, Chris attempts to employ some of his trademark [[random-access humor]], by showing wacky stuff on each floor. Why Sonichu and Rosechu would stop at each floor to look at whatever's going on is never explained, but they clearly react to whatever they see, meaning that they must have pressed all the buttons on the elevator controls for no good reason. Much of the material featured in these pages were images lifted directly from [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], whether Chris understood their context or not.

*2nd floor: Chris draws 4-cent employees passing out drunk at their workstations. When the second shift comes to relieve the first, they begin drinking "REEB" while the first shifters lay unconscious on the floor.

*3rd floor: Pedobear in a bathtub with the Powerpuff Girls. Sonichu doesn't understand the joke.

*4th floor: Banner reading "I hate SMRS", a reference to "Sonicrocksmysocks", from the ED article by the same name.

*7th floor: A 4-cent employee works on a drawing of Rosechu with a dick. Rosechu angrily leaves the elevator to punch him in the face, shouting "I have a vagina, uterus, and ovaries, you freak!!!"

*8th floor: Sonichu spin dashes a 4-cent employee working on a picture of [[Mary Lee Walsh]], nude and leading Sonichu by a leash.

*9th floor: Sonichu and Rosechu electrocute an employee as he works on a picture of Sonichu fellating Rosechu's cock.

*10th floor: Chris emerges from the [[Time_Void|time void]] to attack an employee working on a picture of Chris using the [[Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail]]. Sonichu and Rosechu cheer him on in unison.

*11th floor: Troll parody of artwork by Branca, a batshit insane fan of the animated band Gorillaz.

*12th floor: Fan art of Knuckles as a gangster, surrounded by sexualized versions of female "Sonic" characters. Sonichu naively wonders when he became so popular.

*13th floor: Female versions of Sonic, Knuckles, and Tails. Sonichu and Rosechu are dumbfounded.

*14th floor; Pedobear, depicted to resemble Phoenix Wright.

*21st floor: "The Large Bathers," an 1887 painting by Pierre-Auguste Renoir. The image has been edited with captions, referencing the "Branca" article on ED.

*22nd floor: [[Yu-gi-Oh!]] Rule 34, from the ED article. Sonichu innocently considers it an impressive dark magic attack.

*23rd floor: An anthropomorphized Charmeleon with her arms handcuffed behind her back spreads her asscheeks, as if for sexual activity. More Rule 34 from ED's Pokemon article. Sonichu ignores the sexualized content, and boasts that he could easily defeat the Charmeleon. Well, duh, it's handcuffed.

*24th floor: Hate art of Snapesnogger's hermaphrodite naga character drawn by Zeriara.

*33rd floor: Rule 34 Art from ED's Transformers page.

*34th floor: [[Sonic]]/[[Amy Rose]] Rule 34. Sonichu cheers on his "pal" as they watch him have sex in a position very similar to the "missionary cowgirl" used by Sonichu at the beginning of the story.

*35th floor: Nude artwork of Amy Rose, Rouge the Bat, and Cream the Bunny. Sonichu and Rosechu shout "Holy Crap!" in unison.

*36th floor: Strip Poker game featuring various female characters from Sonic the Hedgehog. The image has been adapted into a parody of a Magic: The Gathering Card.

*51st floor: The entire White House, with John McCain, Sarah Palin, and Hilary Clinton, looking on while [[Barack Obama]] paints the wall black. [[George W. Bush]] cheerfully knocks his eventual successor off his ladder. Sonichu and Rosechu offer no discernible reaction. Chris notes that his father [[Bob Chandler]] came up with this "joke."

*61st floor: Erotic artwork of Dot Warner, from Animaniacs.

*62nd floor: Erotic artwork of Lois Griffin, from Family Guy.

*63rd floor: Erotic artwork of Marge Simpson, from The Simpsons.

*64th floor: Rule 34 of Misty and a Starmie, from ''Pokémon''. Sonichu and Rosechu make out during this and the preceding three floors.

*69th floor: Image of "XBOX 360-ko", an anime-style character patterned after design elements of the XBox 360. As the following floor features an XBOX360 console being destroyed, Chris includes a disclaimer, stating that his hatred of the [[Hex Bawx]] should not be connected to any lingering resentment of women.

*70th floor: Drawing by Chris of an XBOX 360 console being chopped in half with a meat cleaver. Sonichu and Rosechu applaud the instrument's destruction. The imagery is a clear indication that Chris secretly desires to murder women.

*71st floor: PS3 message congratulating whoever murdered the Hex-Box. It states that you may "now play your Playstation 3 or Nintendo Wii in peace", as though the existence of a single XBox somehow interfered with such activity.

===The Clarksville Address===

On the 36th floor, Wild finds the Sonichu ball in an empty room. Holding both of his balls somehow prevents Wild from using his invisibility power, or contacting Magi-Chan for extraction. Wild is left with no choice but to sneak out of the building on his own, which really isn't that big a deal, seeing as there are only three people in the whole place anyway.

On the 72nd floor, Sonichu and Rosechu confront Jason, who introduces himself as a 20-year-old [[Troll]], and his companion [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]] as his "minory 17-year old woman", with whom everything he does is "illegal in these 50 states". When he bids he hedgehogs to state their case, Sonichu delivers a moving speech:

{{quote|Yes, sir, my loving, caring Sweetheart and I have come to discuss the web page in question. We humbly request that it would be removed from the internet for good. For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxymoron great, humble] United States of America along with him. You've had your laughs, but ask yourself, is it really worth it to continue on with these slanders that drags the names of the good people within this country that was founded with love and peace within it that those before us have fought valently to withold, that I was born and raised under the old glory that is the red, white and blue. In my humble answer, I say nay! What is your answer, Mister, Howell?|Sonichu, delivering the Clarksville Address}}

{{quote|I'd say, you are a sap. I am a troll with no such beliefs, I know that we are born, then we die. I intend to make the most of my pitiful life by tormenting every person within my grasp until they all die from the shame and the distress of their existance. The page will stay up; this meeting is over!|Jason Kendrick Howell, speaking for us all}}

Enraged, Sonichu attacks Jason, but is no match for his awesome powers. Rosechu elects to withdraw, preferring to forgive Jason since there is no reasoning with him. The two leave with their arms around each other, and Chris interrupts the story to pointlessly explain how the two crimes against nature can touch each other's spiny backs without injury.

Adding insult to injury, Jason tosses a [[pickle]] at Rosechu, striking her on the back of the head. Pushed to the breaking point, Rosechu crushes the pickle, strips nude, and leaps into the air to attack Jason.
[[Image:Rosechustrips1.png|thumb]]
{{quote|I am the power. I am the warrior. I am the almighty woman! True to all of my gender, I will overpower any evil or good man who defies us, and make hum succumb to our will. I have the almighty uterus; that makes me strong and superpowerful enough to protect the loved ones within me, until they emerge to their glorious birth. By my ferocious will, I shall punish he who has defiled my people with the worst unnatural addition ever by this one's heinous hand!|Rosechu's thoughts, apparently influenced by PCP.}}

[[Image:Bigboss.JPG|thumb|200px|right|"What a show!"]]
With ferocious roars, Rosechu lands pelvis-first on Jason's head, and wraps her tail and legs around his body, SHOVING his face up her [[China|vagina]]. With sadistic glee, she claws open his head and bites down on the wound, then unleashes a powerful burst of electrical power. Sonichu even says she "had him going." Pervert. Though dark forces somehow sustain Jason's life, he admits that the attack would have otherwise been fatal. Exhausted, Rosechu gathers her clothes, and leaves with Sonichu. While he is impressed with her display of raw fury, Rosechu is horrified at her primal rage, and makes some mention that she "transformed" into "some monster," expressing concern that "this thing" won't overtake her again. If Sonichu were a better comic, this might be interpreted as foreshadowing, but since it's Chris, there is a 99.9% chance that this will never be mentioned again.

Outside, the three Hedgehogs reunite, and Magi-Chan teleports them back to CWCville.

==Episode 17: Epilogue==

Later, Rosechu hosts a gathering of other Rosechus to protest 4-cent_garbage and uphold [[Women's Rights]] by producing pornographic photoshoots. In addition to [[Bubbles]], [[Angelica]], and [[Lolisa]], the group is joined by [[Simonla Rosechu]], who supplies the backdrops for the shoot and volunteers her services as a model. The group is also joined by [[Zapina Rosechu]], a fourteen year old loli who desperately wants to [[pedofork|"volunteer her services of cuteness"]] to the project and join in the strippin' fun. Citing "the dumb laws<ref>While many argue that Chris is referring to "dumb laws" against child pornography, it is plausible he's referring to "dumb" child labor laws which would prohibit Zapina from participating in setting up lights, cameras, etc. for the photo shoot. In any case, Chris thinks it's "dumb" that a 14 year old can't work, sexually or otherwise.</ref>", Rosechu refuses her help, but Lolisa offers to supervise Zapina as she uses the light from her mutant ass to illuminate the photoshoot.

==Episode 18: Prologue==
{{Resources
| title = Prologue
| cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_8/Page_60 ''Episode 18''
| videobook =Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook#Episode_18{{!}}''Episode 18''
| sonichusite =http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic9P2.htm ''Episode 18''
| audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBk_MebLB0k ''Episode 18''}}
[[Image:LikeFatherLikeSon.jpg|thumb|right|Sonichu squeezes and kisses Rosechu and leaves her feeling [[Megan|extremely uncomfortable]]. Like [[Christian Weston Chandler|father]], like son!]]
Apparently ''still'' concerned that someone will accuse him of being a [[Pedofork]], Chris establishes ''yet again'' that his characters are of legal age, this time by actually showing the birthday parties held for most of the main cast since Episode 17. Rosechu turns 19 on December 22, 2007. The [[Chaotic Combo]] turn 19 on February 2, 2008. Sonichu turns 20 on March 17, 2008.

Finally, [[Black Sonichu]] celebrates his birthday in a private get-together with [[Bubbles Rosechu]]. Blake disputes that he even has a birthday, since he was cloned from Sonichu's [[Semen|DNA]] (and thus not born of a Rosechu's uterus, which is stupid because every other Soni/Rosechu were just shat out of a rainbow anyway). Bubbles, however, insists that he is a 20-year-old "starting straight with a 2-year old body". Bubbles asks Blake what he wished for and he says "It's already come true", where Chris is either butchering the classic teen film "Sixteen Candles" or the Family Guy parody of it. The two kiss, and Black Sonichu agrees to rendezvous with Bubbles at the CWCville Spring Break Concert on March 22.

Chris introduces Spring Break by ripping off a gag from a [[Family Guy]] episode, wherein Meg Griffin tries to ignore Spring Break by flipping channels, only to find that every station is covering Spring Break, including the news. Chris repeats the joke almost verbatim, except he [[fail]]s to include anyone actually watching the television, thus undermining the premise. The scene is best remembered for the appearance of [[Excel-Saga|FQX]] newswoman Greta Squall, a hideously deformed woman with club-like arms and scars on her face which look like the numeral "2".

==Episode 18: "Spring Break, 2008!"==
{{Resources
| title = Spring Break, 2008!
| cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_8/Page_66 ''Episode 18''
| videobook =Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook#Episode_18{{!}}''Episode 18''
| sonichusite =http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic9P2.htm ''Episode 18''
| audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBk_MebLB0k ''Episode 18''}}
The story proper opens with [[KCWC]] DJs [[Jamsta Sonichu]] and [[Lolisa Rosechu]] covering the event.

{{quote|We have a lot of great events and giveaways goin' on here today. Thank our mayor, Mr. Christian Weston Chandler that CWCville is a clean city; nobody has to go home drunk or somkey! We've got coolers and kegs full of our famously delicious CWC-Cola, Diet CWC-Cola, Lemonade, Grape and Orange Soda, compliments of our local CWC-Cola Bottling Company, founded and opened proudly in 1985; three years after CWCville was founded by our mayor's father, [[Bob Chandler|Robert Franklin Chandler, Jr.]] You can enter to win a 40-inch Sony HD-TV from Cwick-Circuit City, or drive home in a shiny new '08 Chevy Camaro Concept. Also tonight, our rising star, [[Jiggliami]] will be singing her debut single, "War of Love" on the concert stage here at CWCville Beach. So stay tuned to CWCville, Virginia's number 1 radio station for all this and a lot more!|Jamsta Sonichu, desperately craving nicotine and liquor}}

Almost immediately, Lolisa excuses herself to take a swim.

On the stage, Jiggliami and [[Blanca]] eagerly await their performance. As in their appearance in [[Sonichu 7|Sonichu #7]], both of them babble incoherently about their music. Blanca maintains that she will wait for Chris to return from the time void — ironic, since Blanca had betrayed Chris long before this episode was uploaded to the internet.

On the beach, the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]] enjoy themselves. Like Franklin from "Peanuts", characters with suntans are depicted with vertical lines for shading. When Chris does it, though, it just looks like the characters are shaking uncontrollably, teleporting, or just soaked with [[comeuppance|jizz]]. While Sonichu heads off to surf, the Rosechus lie on the beach.

For no good reason, Bubbles explains that she has no need for sunscreen, because she is incapable of tanning and impervious to sunburn. This has something to do with her being a Water-type Pokemon, her body being composed of 90% water, and her fur being capable of adapting itself to her surroundings. This would beg the question of how ''any'' hedgehog Pokemon can tan, being covered with fur as they are.

The Rosechus notice a mysterious black Rosechu, and later catch up with [[Megagi]] and [[Bionic the Hedgehog]]. [[Sarah Jackson]] and [[PandaHalo]] make a cameo appearance as well.

Bubbles's sunbathing is interrupted when Magi-Chan contacts her to collect a Sonichu Ball from the ocean. Before she can get up to find the ball, Black Sonichu kicks sand on the girls. Rosechu threatens to attack him, but Bubbles offers to do it herself, and pretends to force Black Sonichu away from the others. While she and Blake seem determined to hide their relationship, Rosechu and Angelica secretly know the truth, and laugh at the transparency of Bubbles's ruse.

Chris incorporates a drawing of Sonichu surfing by PandaHalo, yet he manages to dick up the continuity by drawing in different colored water around the edges of the picture. Also, Sonichu wasn't wearing his shoes earlier, but Panda's drawing shows him wearing shoes.

Elsewhere on the beach, Bubbles tells Blake of her mission to find the Sonichu Ball, and they agree to meet at Pier 969 later for disgusting sex. Little do they know that the black Rosechu from before has eavesdropped on their conversation. As she transforms into a duplicate of Bubbles, Chris introduces her as [[Silvana Rosechu]] and explains that hers was the ''sixth'' egg that emerged from the [[Rainbow]] along with the five eggs that became the Chaotic Combo. Silvana's egg wound up on the Earth's moon, where [[Count Graduon]] somehow made telepathic contact with her in [[1980s#1989|1989]]. As Mewtwo mentored the infant Magi-Chan Sonichu, so did Graduon raise Silvana. In addition to training her in the ways of evil, Graduon "upgraded" Silvana to have both male and female genitalia, and enabled her to change her shape.

In the Atlantic Ocean, Bubbles searches for the Sonichu Ball, passing by fan-favorite character [[Yawning Squirtle]], among other crappily drawn Pokemon who sing the song "Under the Sea" from ''[[Things_Chris_has_ripped_off|The Little Mermaid]]'', yet another thing Chris has ripped off.

Meanwhile, Black Sonichu buys condoms in anticipation of the nasty, dirty animal sex he intends to share with his revolting mate. Silvana, posing as Bubbles, meets him, and convinces him not to wear a condom. Blake agrees, never suspecting Silvana's power to ejaculate a "paralyzing sleep solution" during intercourse. At Pier 969, Blake humps the foul creature, never suspecting that cock is ramming up against Silvana's own penis, which is surely withdrawn inside her vagina-thing. Blake passes out from the effects of Silvana's cum, and she teleports him to a closet in the CWCville Beach stage. From there, she returns to Pier 969 disguised as Black Sonichu, and lays the same trap for Bubbles. What she had actually intended to ''do'' after systematically seducing and subduing the various [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|recolors]] is never elaborated upon.

Before Bubbles goes to the pier, she hands off the Sonichu Ball to Angelica to ferry back to [[CWCville Mall]]. As she flies off, [[Punchy]] and Wild discuss their sex lives. Punchy wants to bang Angelica, and Wild seems uncertain what to do about his own loneliness. The two resolve to enroll in a Dating Education course offered at CWCville University, thus setting up the [[Sonichu 9|next shitty issue]].

[[File:BubblesXSilvana.jpg|thumb|Silvana's eventual goal.]]
At Pier 969, Bubbles meets Silvana, but before she can present her hindquarters for vomit-inducing copulation, she receives a telepathic message from Magi-Chan, warning her of the impostor. Why Magi-Chan knows the difference, and why he didn't warn Black Sonichu of the same thing, is left to the reader's imagination. Bubbles is skeptical at first, but Jiggliami calls to inform her that she has discovered Black Sonichu in the stage closet. When Black Sonichu himself warns her of the danger, the stupid bitch finally begins to put two and two together. Bubbles exposes Silvana by asking her to attack her with Black Sonichu's electrical powers. Despite the fact that Transform grants the user the ability to mimic all moves known by the target, Silvana instead opts to use her own psychic attack to simulate Blake's power, but Bubbles knows the difference. Silvana reveals herself, and teleports away before Bubbles can avenge Blake's manhood. Horrified, she returns to Blake's side to comfort him.

That night, Jiggliami finally performs the damned song Chris had been promoting for four months. Chris credits Blanca Weiss for composing the lyrics on August 20, 2008, which contradicts the premise of Jiggliami performing the same song on March 22, 2008. Also, the song, "War of Love", makes no sense whatsoever, and resembles the sort of crap Chris writes all the time.

As an epilogue of sorts, Chris establishes that Blanca found "her boyfriend" and returned to her home state of Kentucky, despite previously establishing that she intended to wait for Chris to return from the time void. Acknowledging his own personal life, Chris briefly discusses the three [[Trolls|women]] he was involved with during the fall of 2008. Chris claims to have been uncertain about which one to pursue, and credits God and Jesus for eliminating two of them by having [[Optimus Prime]] kill [[Sarah Jackson]], and revealing the second to be in alliance with the trolls. Presumably, this is meant to refer to Blanca, even though Chris has depicted her as his girlfriend in this very story. The third woman, [[PandaHalo]], Chris declares to be his True Sweetheart, and the person he would promise his [[sex|first time]] to, although he would abandon her for dead within two months.

In a small note on the last page, Chris acknowledges the suicide of [[Ryan Cash]], and admits a modicum of responsibility for his death.

==Alternate versions==

When originally uploaded to [[Sonichu.net]], Chris offered multiple versions of the Episode 17, depending on which link the reader selected. These were based upon the ratings system used for television content.

[[Image:TVMA.jpg|48px|left]] '''TV-MA''': The uncut version of the comic. It was quickly unlinked from the site; however, all files still remained available.
{{Clear}}
[[Image:TV14.jpg|48px|left]] '''TV-14''': A censored version of the above comic. Mostly, this is accomplished by Chris putting photographs of bananas over Sonichu's dick, an orange over Rosechu's vagina, and blue stars on her nipples. Other objects are used throughout the issue to conceal nude pictures Chris took from [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. These lousy edits can be seen [http://www.mediafire.com/?tt0s91mnmez here]
{{Clear}}
[[Image:TVY7.jpg|48px|left]] '''TV-Y7''': A version which omitted many pages of the original story. Chris appears to have created "Rage Against the Garbage" with these edits in mind, as the TV-Y7 pages are numbered normally, while the pages featuring nudity and sex were lettered (e.g. page 19-A, 19-B, etc.). As the sexual content in the story was gratuitous and pointless in the first place, removing it did little to harm the quality of the work, except that the plot is significantly altered. Since Rosechu's faceraping of Jason had to be removed, the TV-Y7 version implies that Sonichu and Rosechu left peacefully, never to revisit the matter again.

Chris would rearrange the content in the TV-14 version numerous times before finally settling on a single version of the story, with most of the nudity removed and Rosechu's facerape attack left in. The hedgehog porn was reportedly removed at the request of his parents, and Chris would later add a message to his site stating his solemn vow to never again depict his characters engaged in sexual activity. This promise was soon broken when Chris created [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]] and snuck all of the deleted scenes there.

===The uncensored scenes===

By popular demand, here are the uncensored images from Sonichu 8, including the ones from Episode 17's prologue that now appear on [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Biology CWCipedia's 'Biology' page underneath 'Reproductive Biology of Sonichu and Rosechu']. Enjoy [[mass debating|fapping]] to these, you sick fucks.

{{collapsible
|Uncensored images from Sonichu 8 (abandon hope all ye who enter here)
|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:SchuComic9Page1-B.jpg
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</gallery>}}

==Links==

* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCjgNF0NTwQ Examining Sonichu & Rosechu Audiobook]

==Sauces and Notes==
<references/>

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Sonichu comic book issues]]

Homos

2010-07-23T02:11:35Z

Jerkop: /* See also */

[[Image:Homobad.jpg|center|300px]]

{{quote|Homo males are objectionable, VERY objectionable (I hate them!)|[[CWC Update 30 January 2009]]}}

The pejorative term by which [[Christian Weston Chandler]] refers to '''homosexual people''' almost exclusively.

From the very beginning of his [[Internet]] fame in [[2007]], his extreme opposition to homosexuality and his neurotic, obsessive demand that everyone [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"STAY STRAIGHT"]] have been one of his most noted and exploited aspects.

==Fear of being a homo==

[[Image:0067-Christian&Barbie.jpg|thumb|left|Chris tried to stay straight from an early age, by posing with Barbie]]
[[Image:CWC new novel.png|thumb|A glimpse into the future?]]
[[Image:What_Chris_thinks_he_looks_like.png|thumb|Chris shows his [[Rainbow|true colors]]]]

{{quote|"Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."|Chris <ref>E-mail to Megan, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*:; Date: Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm</ref>}}

Chris's homophobia is just that: he is literally afraid of homosexuality and of anything that could conceivably cause a straight person to be "leered off the straight path." His terror is such that he can barely bring himself to even utter the word "gay" or any other term concerning gay people, except of course for "homo." He has said that he cannot even look at a picture of a [[pickle|penis]] without being "freaked out"<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref> and he has cited [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|several techniques]] he believes are necessary to maintain his sexual attraction to women.<ref>[[Mailbag 3#Hypnotize away the gay|Mailbag 3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 3#Sexy posters|Mailbag 3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 4#Dissolving homoerotic thoughts in stomach acid|Mailbag 4]]</ref>

Chris is also convinced that chances of homosexuality are raised as a direct result of not engaging in heterosexual intercourse before maturation,<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Dating_Education</ref> his retarded [[Dating Education]] classes naturally being the reasonable solution to preventing people from becoming homos. He continues to attempt to wildly assert his straightness (and fail at it), using stupid shit such as the [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail]] to objects as strange and totemic as his [[Optimus Prime]] toy. His attitude could be explained by one of four possibilities:

# Chris is a heterosexual idiot, so he thinks the slightest thing could turn him gay unless he maintains constant vigilance.
# Chris is a repressed homosexual, so he ''knows'' the slightest thing could turn him gay, because he can barely resist the temptation.
# Chris is bisexual, yet his underdeveloped mind fails to grasp the fact that there's actually such a thing as male bisexuality, so he thinks that people really ''can'' choose their sexual preference, and that giving in to his feelings towards other males will automatically turn him gay.
# Chris is asexual and has no primal instincts attracting him to girls, so he must consciously go out of his way to stay straight and avoid becoming a homo.
# Chris is autistic, and was raised by very old people. This combination caused him to learn about sex at a delayed rate, and causes him to interpret sexuality in peculiar ways. Hating homos helps Chis organize his confusing sexual knowledge, and adheres to his parental/religion based morals.

We don't yet have enough information to determine which of these is true, and we won't until he kisses a man on the lips (currently scheduled for [[2010]]). Of course, we have to consider (because Chris won't) the small point that anyone, gay or straight, man or [[China|woman]], white or [[Niggo|black]], would most likely rather clean his or her genitals with sandpaper than touch Chris.

==Hatred of homos==

Chris's animosity towards gay people seems to result primarily from his fear of them and their supposed ability/desire to make him gay (this, despite the fact that women are likely jealous of the fact that men don't have to worry about Chris being attracted to them). He has often characterized the [[trolls]] as homos, which is either a basic ''ad hominem'' attack or a sincere belief that anyone who draws penises on [[Rosechu]] must be gay.

Notably, in [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC chat]] from 02 January 2009, Chris made this statement:

{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"|Chris, 02 January 2009, 11:59}}

[[Image:Bionic2.jpg|thumb|Chris projects his repressed homosexuality onto [[Bionic|one of his own abominations]]]]

He added that gay men should be incarcerated in co-ed prisons with other female offenders and be provided with access to prostitutes, arguing that they would come out "reprogrammed" into healthy, law-abiding heterosexuals.

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|February 18 2009]], Chris issued a retraction of his previous homophobic remarks and declared that he respects "the gay people" like he respects his [[gal pals]] and his [[sweethearts]]. However, this was mostly done at the insistence of [[Julie]]; by [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|March 10]] Chris was reciting verses from the Bible to justify his position against homos.

On 14 June 2009, he created a video called [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], which in the Chris-chan tradition of ruining everything you ever loved is a homophobic version of Uncle Ruckus's song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from the pilot episode of ''The Boondocks.''

Later on in the day, he published an apology for the video called "[[I'm Sorry, Dude]]", and insisted that he likes gays who "ac—...accomplish other things, like Stephen Fry who was a homosexual, but y'know he did a good job being a narrator on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''." This quote, of course, displays Chris's ignorance, as Stephen Fry is also a famous actor, comedian, writer, narrator (on things other than LBP), and author of some extremely witty and charming blogs that have a large Internet following, as well as being an advocate for gay rights. This apology was only posted for the sake of his [[gal pal]] Kim's boyfriend, whose gay brother apparently lost both his arms in Iraq.

Curiously, Chris goes out of his way to state that the children of Sonichu and Rosechu are watched over by [[Heather Iglesias]], whom he characterizes as "a pretty, trustworthy, good natured Spanish Lesbian." He further mentions that Heather keeps her sexuality a secret from the kids at the request of Sonichu himself. It is unknown why Chris mentions this, given that he has vacillated wildly in the past in his feelings on lesbianism, sometimes [[Mumble 1|coming out in support]] and other times [[CWC "Boyfriend"|condemning it]], or why the character is both Hispanic and a lesbian.

Chris occasionally tries to say he respects homosexuals for who they are. However, he repeatedly betrays his intolerance of different lifestyles, often within the same statement.

{{quote|"I personally respect the individual people as fellow human beings, and I am cool with associating with them as acquaintances and friends, but Please Do Not Wave Around what you do behind closed doors around me; NOBODY CARES TO KNOW; I PERSONALLY DO NOT CARE TO KNOW. Even within my imagination, I Do Not Care to even have the pictures Randomly Pop up in my head."|Chris <ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality</ref>}}

Because it's OK for him to wave around his degenerate sexuality and showcase real life pictures of his disgusting activities, but god forbid a well-adjusted male adult mention they love other men.

On 8 July, Chris left a comment on a PSN News Post in reference to a Unity avatar:<ref>http://blog.us.playstation.com/2009/07/attention-fighting-fans-prove-youre-the-best-around/</ref>
{{quotebox|Hey, the Street Fighter Tourney is good news, but I have a concern about the person who left the message.

His Avitar…

If that icon is WHAT I THINK IT IS, I AM OFFENDED; please change your Avitar, dude.}}

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 26, 2009|July 26 2009]], Chris goes so far as to call gay a synonym for stupid.

In the mailbag section of the [[CWCipedia]], Chris describes at length his idea for his comic self to travel to the future, where scientists have successfully isolated the "homo gene" (an idea stolen from [[Wikipedia:Family Gay|this episode of]] ''[[Family Guy]]''). They have not, however, isolated the "straight gene", and are only able to when Chris donates his own blood (Chris has once remarked that [[Honor roll|homosexuality could be cured by injecting blood from straight men into homosexuals]], or by imprisoning gays in [[Rape|co-ed prisons]]). Chris intended to bring at least two syringes of the solution back, one for [[Reldnahc]], and the other for emergencies (likely to be used on either himself, [[Magi-Chan]], or [[Megagi]]). Thanks to Chris's crippling insecurity about his sexuality, when this storyline finally came to light in [[Sonichu 10]], Chris amended this plan to not only bring back a couple of syringes, but also enough of the "cure" to turn every gay person on Earth straight.

[[Jack Thaddeus]] purchased advertisement space on the [[CWCipedia]] to put up two ads on the site. One of them was an ad featuring Peter Griffin of ''Family Guy'', pointing out that he and his creator, Seth MacFarlane, were supportive of gay rights. In retaliation, Chris blew his stack, [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|stating]]:

{{quote|I understand you getting paid to run ads in that box on the Cwcipedia. I feel okay with Vivian's Audiobooks, BUT I feel OFFENDED with the Mexico Contest and Gay-Rights Ads. The Pickle on the Mexico ad reminds me of a terrible time in my past with Pickle-Suited TROLLS, and '''I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLES and FOR STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUALITY.'''

Please Remove, or Change the Images of, THE TWO ADS.

And in the future, if you plan on adding more advertisements, INCLUDING the associated images, Please run them by me in a message for my personal Approval BEFORE you start running the ads.

Thank you.|Chris, <ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User_talk:WikiSysop#The_New_Ad-Links WikiSysop User Talk: The New Ad-Links ]</ref>}}

In a [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|phone call]] with [[Jack Thaddeus]], Chris stated that he assumed that a friend of Jack's was gay when he heard that he had AIDS.

On Christmas Day, 2009, the Sysop at the CWCipedia added a Twitter onto the webpage. Two days later, Chris saw this and flew into a tizzy, wanting the Twitter off as he didn't want any "homo trolls" talking behind his back.

Around New Year 2010, Chris replaced Jack Thaddeus's gay-friendly ads with ads for [[wikipedia:Love In Action|Love In Action]] (an "ex-gay" ministry), ProtectMarriage.com (a site promoting [[wikipedia:California Proposition 8 (2008)|Proposition 8]]), and a site that calls for a boycott on Pepsi due to their gay-friendliness. In another ad, he also suggested that ''[[wikipedia:Avatar (2009 film)|Avatar]]'' was a ''totally'' straight film. To sum it up: Ex-gay campaigns, Proposition 8 and ridiculous consumer boycotts — in one fell swoop, Chris managed to put in three big things that do ''not'' win himself any gay friends whatsoever and prove all of his previous "respect" for gays is nothing but idle words.

On January 5th, Chris responded a [[mailbag]] letter addressing the homosexual subject. In the answer, Chris stated that [[Magi-Chan]] keeps a constant psychic-surveillance to ensure that there are no homos in CWCville. When evidence of homosexuality was found in a couple, the people involved would be arrested and fined heavily. Chris also apparently fails to notice that by having Magi-chan constantly reading people's mind would infringe the most important and basic of human rights: the right of freedom of thinking. He also fails to realize that having Magi-chan scan CWCville for gay thoughts would end in Chris getting arrested due to the fact that he says he has random images of penises appear in his head.

Then, on January 7th, when answering the question of how he began hating the gay population, we got this interesting insight...

{{quote|I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, 2003 just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE!|[[Common Questions#Answered 07 January 2010|Chris, before finally stating (for the umpteenth time) that Sonichu is straight]]}}

Not only is this ironic, considering his current views on lesbianism, but it adds another interesting aspect to his hatred: Chris's frustration with homos is influenced by him being childish and whiny about not getting his way, just because ''one'' woman turned him down. We wouldn't expect anything different from him.

On 30 [[January 2010]], Chris voiced his opinion about the ban of homosexuals in the American Armed Forces. He is for the lifting of the ban so that "[[Mailbag 49#Chris loves his country|the homos can go die in explosions]]".
{{clear}}

==Why Chris appears to be gay==

[[Image:564Homos.jpg|thumb|left|At least Chris doesn't [[fail]] at cataloging pictures. [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality No, it's not a shoop] ]]
[[Image:CWCMonica.jpg|thumb|Oh lawd, is dat some lipstick on Chris?]]

{{quote|First off, should such images [of men's asses] enter your mind at random, just stop yourself. I have had this problem too. I would take all such images when they enter my mind and just delete them; I imagine, in my mind, rolling them all into a ball, shrinking it down, and tossing them into a garbage can that links to my Stomach through a direct bodily vein. I imagine the feeling of it falling through the vein and making its splash landing into the stomach acid and dissolving; gone forever.|Chris admitting he's had homoerotic fantasies, [[Mailbag 4]]}}

[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|Fun fact: [[rainbow]] colors are the internationally recognized colors for the gay pride movement]]
[[Image:Sonichuballs.jpg|thumb|For someone who claims to be straight, Chris sure does love talking about BALLS. Also, balls are touching]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|That's one [[pickle|phallic]] [[Lego]] tower you're building there, Chris]]
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]

[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|Ironically, the harder Chris tries to convince people he's straight, the more gay he appears.]] He has absolutely no awareness that an uptight, milquetoast, colorfully-dressed, squeaky-voiced man saying "I am straight! I have a subscription to ''Playboy''!" every five minutes looks like he has something he's trying to hide. Furthermore, the more we learn about Chris, the more gay he really appears to be.

* Christian has stated that if he were unable to stay straight he would undergo sex reassignment surgery; he would rather be female than gay. It should be noted that straight men never, ever, put this much thought into this hypothetical dilemma.

* He collects [[My Little Pony]] figures well into early adulthood.

* For a straight man, he sure does [[Semen#Transcript|consume a lot of semen]]. Likewise, the idea of [[Kacey Phone Call|licking his own ejaculate]] off one of his gal-pals sexually arouses him.

* Like many gay men, most of his [[gal-pal|"friends"]] were female and he never slept with any of them.

* In a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN Chat with Julie]], Chris admitted that he randomly has images of penises (his own and others he's seen in porn) pop into his head. He also claims to hear voices in his head that say "Christian is gay." Unless Chris is having ''very specific'' auditory hallucinations, it's likely he has homoerotic daydreams and freaks out about it. In the same chat he sounded ''delighted'' describing the first time he saw semen in a porno movie as a teenager.

* He owns, or at least has owned, anal beads and a vibrator, and he is on record as having experimented with putting both toys in his anus. In a chat during the [[Vanessa Saga]] on 16 [[April 2009]], he claimed that he no longer shoved things up his ass, except for "a narrow jet of water from my adjustable shower-head on a hose."<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 3]]</ref> Although it is quite possible to stick things up your butt and still be straight, people who are terrified of being turned gay generally do not do this.

*Chris said that he would put something up his ass for [[Ivy]] "in a heartbeat", including a large fake dick, and would let her fuck him with a strap-on.<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 7]]</ref>

*Chris said that he might let a gay guy fuck him if Ivy wanted that.<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 9]]</ref>

* Christian argues that the vibrator and anal beads were sent to him as a gift with an order of straight pornography; he did not ask for them or pay for them. However, according to [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|the receipts]] that were uncovered by trolls, Chris specifically asked for the anal beads as the gift.

* Chris gets upset that people know he has the vibrator and anal beads, and he gets upset that people think he's gay because he kept the vibrator and anal beads... but he never gets upset that the store sent him the vibrator and anal beads in the first place. You would think that if a troll sent him a dildo he'd be throwing a fit about it on [[YouTube]], but no.

* Chris kept the vibrator around for months.

* In the [[Chris Sex Logs]], Chris shows off a dildo to [[PandaHalo]]. He immediately suggests the phallic sex toy is something that [[Sex_Logs#This_is_my_dildo|goes up your butt]], and then immediately denies it's been up his butt. He also says having a dildo in your butt "will feel good."

* On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009|February 05 2009]] Chris posted two videos stating that he was coming out of the closet as a gay man. He later issued a retraction which was far less persuasive.

* When negotiating for the safe return of his PSN account from [[Max]], Chris was given the choice of burning his [[medallion]] or shoving it up his ass. Chris immediately chose to shove it up his ass.

* Chris thought a straight woman would be turned on by a [[nudes|closeup picture of his anus]].

* He wears a pink [[Belt Buckle of Fail|belt buckle]].

* He owns a set of [[Anime Wings]] which are basically hair clips. And hair clips are for women.

* His best man at [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|his wedding]] is [[Sarah Hammer]] in drag.

*He sang "I Love the Nightlife" on his [[Chris's Big Night Out|visit to a local bar/restaurant]], which is popular at gay clubs and drag revues.

* [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|''Christian and the Hedgehog Boys'']] features two covers of the Backstreet Boys, one cover of a [[Britney Spears]] song and one cover of a Ricky Martin song. This music was popular among 13 year old girls when it was new and is popular among the gay community today.

* [[muscle bra|He wears a bra.]] In fairness, he uses it to [[Fridays After Five|try to attract women.]]

* He [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|implores men to wear bras]] because looking at shirtless men makes Chris uncomfortable,<ref>[[Mailbag 55#On braziers|Mailbag 55]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 55#Draconian_fun.21|Mailbag 55]]</ref> possibly arousing latent homosexual urges.

* He saved a [[No More Jokes|homoerotic image]] to his computer, and then made a series of movies about it.

* When you look up "'''Homosexuality'''" in Chris's [[CWCipedia|own web encyclopedia]], you ''literally'' see his own portrait (as shown on the screencap at the top of this section).

* In addition, the article for Homosexuality was created August 8th, 2009. The article for [[Rosechu|Rosechu]], a major character in his comics, wouldn't be created until 6 months later.

* In the [[PS3 History Level|PS3 History Level]] video, he showed that he actually owns a copy of ''Sex and the City: The Movie'' (which has a huge gay following) when he showcased his then current collection of [[PS3]] games and movies.

* While narrating the [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] Chris called PandaHalo his "partner," a term sometimes used by gays and lesbians to refer to the person they're dating.

* In his response to a letter in [[Mailbag 4]] about "impure" homoerotic thoughts, Chris confesses that he "[has] had this problem too," and has to resort to deleting them through a curious process that involves tossing them into a garbage bin inside him, lest the gay gene take its toll.

* Chris reacts to Alec Benson Leary's [[Asperchu]] comics by giving the all the characters a free makeover.

* In [[Sonichu 10]], Chris donates some of his "straight blood" to doctors in the future so that they could make a vaccine against homosexuality. Vaccines are made from people who have the virus being fought.

* One of Chris's ModNation Racers vehicles is called "A Man's Toy", which is a light blue carriage with rainbow lollipop wheels and a message that says "Tea parties are good" on the rear end of the carriage.<ref>http://community.modnation.com/en-us/players/Sonichu/creations/1296110</ref>

{{clear}}

==Defenses against becoming homo==

[[Image:CWCIsSTRAIGHT.jpg|thumb|According to Chris, heterosexuals defend their sexuality by taping index cards indicating their straightness to their shoes (while stomping on [[vibrator]]s). Srsly.]]

It's hard work for a warrior of true love and honesty to stay straight. Luckily, Chris has a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] which he stares at everyday to stave off his temptations of homosexuality.

Chris also subscribes to ''Playboy'' to help keep himself straight. You can tell he's straight because when he's explaining what he finds attractive in women it only takes five seconds for him to get around to boobies and [[China|vaginas]].

When homosexual (or potentially homosexual) [[trolls|fans]] sent Chris questions on the [[CWCipedia]] asking for tips to STAY STRAIGHT, Chris tends to offer what essentially amounts to self-brainwashing. Some of his ideas include thinking of naked women and how awesome they are, and imagining being struck by painful lightning whenever a homosexual thought occurs (amazingly, the latter appears to be some bizarre version of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Covert_sensitization covert sensitization] with an extremely severe and disproportionate punishment).<ref>[[Mailbag 3#Hypnotize away the gay|Mailbag 3]]</ref> He also clarifies that one need not buy their own poster of fail; any poster featuring attractive women (preferably in bikinis and looking sexy) will do the trick.

To prevent future homos, he also encourages women to not drink, smoke, or be physically abused while pregnant because he believes this could cause the baby to be born homosexual.<ref>[[Mailbag 5#Daniel Tammet/Punching your baby will make it gay|Mailbag 5]]</ref>

In [[Kill De Jack]], Chris reveals another one of his defenses against becoming a homo: he covers a section of his "[[CWC-ism|computer]]" (we can assume that he means "computer screen") with a piece of paper so that he can browse [[CWCipedia]] without looking at [[Jack Thaddeus]]'s ads featuring pictures of homosexual men.

It seems that the centerfold poster of [[The_Simpsons#Marge_Poster|Marge's Playboy magazine]] has become one of Chris's many defenses against becoming a homo. The fact that she's married has [[kacey|no bearing on Chris's desires.]]

{{quote|But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust in his eye has already committed adultery with her in his heart.|- Matthew 28, [[chris and religion|something Chris has probably never read nor wouldn't care to read]].}}

{{clear}}

==Chris on his alleged homosexuality==

[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]]]

*''"I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT! I WILL NOT BE VEERED INTO ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!!!"''<ref>[[Masturbating and squirtin']]</ref>

*''"I'M STRAIGHT! I'M STRAIGHT! '''YOU'RE THE HOMOS!''' EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref>

*''"I'm straight, don't doubt me!"'''<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref>

*''"Listen, as hard as you fucking can, [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|I CAME OUT OF MY]] AUTISTIC [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|CLOSET]] AS A STRAIGHT MAN, and NOTHING ELSE. SO YOU IMMATURE JERKS CAN JUST FUCK OFF."'''<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref>

*''"Yep, you heard me. I am...a [[gaybian|gaaaaaaaaay...bian]]."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the First Video]]</ref>

*''"Anyway the, uh--anyway so, to get to the point...fine. I'm guhh. I'm gaaaay. I'm gaay. I said it...OK. Yep. So...did I really come out of the closet there? That just depends on y'all--how y'all understand it."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the Second Video]]</ref>

*''"And look at me. Do I look like-- [shakes head in disagreement] '''No more of those stupid acquisition messages!''' Get it through your fucking, individual, damn, dirty, SKULLS! '''I. Am. STRAIGHT!'''"''<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts]]</ref>
{{clear}}

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Its OK to be GAY Chris-chan
| video = {{#ev:youtube|32F2Dw01kJc}}
| Stardate = 5 August 2009
| Maker = CWCvillelulz
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = CWC (Ian Brandon Anderson) comes clean
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Bx6MF90NcTo}}
| Stardate = 5 January 2010
| Maker = Psycatalyst
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Homosexuality}}

* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Chris and religion]]
* [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
* [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
* [[Gay 4 Sonichu]]
* [[Gaybian]] (a "male lesbian", according to Chris)
* [[It's UGH!]]
* [[Rainbow]]
* [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]]
* [[Magi-Chan]]
* [[Heather Iglesias]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyO3pnkI3H4 CWC(Ian Brandon Anderson) finally admits it]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE9hdbiwA3k Chris-Chan is sick of the lies!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOpGtblij8Y Chris-Chan proves those slanderous trolls wrong]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Homos]]

Rainbow

2010-07-23T02:07:51Z

Jerkop: /* Possible interpretation of Chris's use of rainbows */

[[Image:0Rainbow1.jpg|thumb|right|[[Random-access_humor|Skadoosh]]]]
A '''rainbow''' is an optical and meteorological phenomenon that causes a spectrum of light to appear in the sky when the Sun shines onto droplets of moisture in the Earth's atmosphere. They take the form of a multicolored arc, with red on the outer part of the arch and violet on the inner section of the arch. In Chris's artwork, he consistently switches the positions of blue and green. This is possibly due to some degree of color-blindness, but more likely it's just because Chris is a fucking idiot.

In the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' canon]] and various other works, rainbows are a recurring theme. For example, a rainbow was responsible for transforming [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] into their present forms. It was later revealed that the same Rainbow also spawned eggs, which eventually matured to become the [[Chaotic Combo]] and [[Silvana]].

In real life, there's a rainbow etched into [[Amnyfest Ring|Chris's high school ring]].

==Introduction==
[[Image:0Rainbow2.jpg|thumb|left|Feels Good Man]]
The rainbow effect was the result of an accidental collision of a male Pikachu with Sonic in [[Sonichu 0]]. As Sonic was using the power of the Chaos Emeralds at the time, their energies somehow caused the Pikachu to mutate into a being similar in appearance to Sonic. This energy also arced across the sky, striking a female Raichu some fifteen miles away, and transforming her into a similar hedgehog-like creature.

Independently, Sonichu and Rosechu realized that they had become the genesis of a new Pokemon species. Eventually, [[Black Sonichu]] was cloned from a sample of Sonichu's [[Semen|DNA]], and the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] would bestow three humans the ability to transform into Sonichus and Rosechus at will, but these were only copies of the originals.

However, Sonichu would soon discover other Sonichus and Rosechus created by the Rainbow.

==The Chaotic Combo==
[[Image:RainbowEggs.jpg|thumb|right|TRUE and HONEST Chaos Rainbows ''shit eggs''.]]

In [[Sonichu 3]], Chris revealed that the Rainbow had also spit out five eggs, which landed in various locations around the world. From within these eggs emerged larval forms of Sonichu and Rosechu, called [[Sonee and Rosey|"Sonee" and "Rosey"]]. These five eventually evolved into variants of Sonichu and Rosechu, each possessing unique abilities and characteristics in addition to the powers of Sonic and Pikachu.

In addition to the eggs, Chris established that "mysterious beams of light also shone from the rainbow", but declined to elaborate; this might be Chris's way of giving himself an out for adding more Sonichus and Rosechus, like Silvana.

==Inconsistencies==

In Sonichu #0, Chris established that Sonichu was 16 years old, and Rosechu was 15. Presumably, this refers to their age upon the day of their transformation, and so they spent the bulk of their lives as a Pikachu and Raichu. [[Sonichu 8]] has since established that the couple turned 19 and 20 as of early [[2008]] in accordance to the ''Earth Time'' of the Rainbow phenomenon (Listed as February 1st, 1989). Note that this would make the Sonic/Pikachu encounter from Issue 0 occur ''three years'' before the release of Sonic's first Genesis game, and ''eight years'' before the first Pokémon games.

The Chaotic Combo were spawned from the Rainbow as eggs, meaning that they would have been born while Sonichu was 16. And yet, ''Sonichu #8'' depicts them celebrating their 19th birthday a few months after Rosechu's 19th birthday. Compounding this, Black Sonichu celebrated his 20th birthday shortly afterward, making him the same age as Sonichu, despite being cloned when Sonichu was 16 years old.

Strangely, when [[Blake|Black Sonichu]] questions the notion of celebrating a birthday for a clone, he points out that he was "not properly born of a Rosechu". The fact is, none of the electric hedgehog Pokémon were born naturally, as they were all shat out of a big dumb rainbow.

==Additional retcons==
[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|right|Chris [[Sub-Episode 2|while standing on a rainbow background]], declaring that his [[Love Quest]] [[Lie|is finally over]].]]
Chris since revised the story of the rainbow ''again'' to reveal that a sixth egg had been launched from the Rainbow, only to somehow wind up on the Earth's moon. There, the newborn Rosey was taken under the wing of [[Count Graduon]], who named her "[[Silvana]]" and trained her in the ways of evil. To better equip her for the cause of sexual villainy, Graduon gave Silvana the power to shape-shift, as well as male genitalia, to better fool horny enemy Rosechus. Like the other egg-born Sonichus and Rosechus, Silvana's age is established to be 19, even though Count Graduon wasn't unleashed until Sonichu was 16 and discovered the Anchuent Prophecy.

To make matters even more confusing, Chris has introduced several other Sonichus and Rosechus throughout the series, including [[Darkbind Sonichu]], [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta]] Sonichu, [[Lolisa Rosechu]], [[Zapina]] Rosechu, and [[Simonla Rosechu]]. There was no initially explanation provided for when or how these other Sonichus and Rosechus were created throughout their appearances in the comic.

Christian revealed his most current patchwork re-telling of the Rainbow's ''gift'' in his own [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu&oldid=1763 Sonichu] article at the CWCipedia. Chris, not to be outdone by prior work, has pushed his myth [[Fail|''way past'' the third dimension]]:
{{quote|From the Rainbow, EGGS were emitted throughout Earth, Space and Time. ALL of The eggs were all time-traveled back to the day of February 2, 1989 into various locations. There were countless eggs in addition to the 5 that would hatch into the Chaotic Combo Electric-Hedgehogs.|[[Christian_Weston_Chandler|Chris]], never too sharp with [[Chris humps his PS3|math]]... so let's just say it's ''more than you can count, mister!''}}

There is a innumerable amount of Electric-Hedgehog Pokémon among us. Be afraid.

==Other uses of rainbows==
[[Image:RainbowOverArk.jpg|thumb|right|Chris offers a "rainbow of promise" to his readers, rightfully comparing the travesty of his nude artwork with that of God's brutal punishment of mankind.]]
It should be noted that the various Sonichus and Rosechus represent every color of the rainbow, although this may be a coincidence, as there's so damn many of them that Chris has no choice but to use every possible color to tell them apart.

Following [[Trolls|fan]] backlash against the hardcore sex scene depicted in Sonichu #8, Chris removed or censored the pages containing genitalia from the site, and posted a ridiculous apology:

{{quote|**After Serious Consideration and numerous complaints, I HAVE REMOVED the explicit sexual pages from EPISODE 17 of Comic #8,
And as GOD Promised NEVER again to Flood the earth with a Rainbow over Noah's Ark, I cast My Rainbow of Promise to NEVER AGAIN
Draw or Upload any Further Images between Sonichus and Rosechus in EPISODE 18 of Comic #8, as well as ALL Future Comics,
that depict explicit sexuality.| Chris, correctly comparing his pornographic artwork to the horrors of global disaster <ref>[http://sonichu-roschu.blogspot.com/2008/09/episode-17-update.html The OFFICIAL Sonichu & Rosechu Blog: Episode 17 Update]</ref>}}

The message was accompanied by a large painting of Noah's Ark, depicting the rainbow described in the book of Genesis.

Despite Chris's assurances, he drew a love scene between Black Sonichu and Silvana Rosechu in the second half of the same issue, and later restored all of the deleted artwork in the [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], along with promises of even more hideous furry porn to come.

Chris also offered a "rainbow of promise" in an e-mail to [[Megan]]:

{{quote|I understand the possible irriation from being touched, but I now realize what may have set off the burst of anger. It was because of my immature behavior (with jealousy) over the winner of that contest, wasn't it? I wanted you to know that I have honestly given up on that erronious behavior. I do apologize for having expressed that anger, and I offer a peaceful rainbow as my promise to not get jealous and express such anger again.|Chris, blowing out his ass<ref>"I now understand" 08 August 2007, 3:46 p.m. [[Chris_E-mails_2007]]</ref>}}

==[[A-U-T-ISM]]==

Chris makes use of rainbow imagery in his failed song "[[A-U-T-ISM]]".

<blockquote><poem style="font-style: italic;">I'm lookin' at you all and I see a rainbow, come on
You think I'm different in every way, come on
All of the times that I've earned [[honor roll]]!</poem></blockquote>

This is probably how [[Autism]] was explained to him. Either that or he thinks everyone is [[gay]].

==Possible interpretation of Chris's use of rainbows==
[[Image:Pride_flag.jpg|center|top]] 
<center>
[[Homo|'''He's gay!'''
 ]]
</center>

==See also==
*[[Chaotic Combo]]
*[[Chaos Emeralds]]
*[[Homos]]

==Sauces==
<references/>

==External links==
*[http://gay4sonichu.yuku.com/ Gay4Sonichu]
*[http://psmission.webs.com/ Pride Sonichu Mission]

[[Category:Plot Devices]]

Charlottesville Fashion Square

2010-07-23T02:03:35Z

Jerkop:

[[Image:FashionSquareMallExternal.jpg|thumb|200px|External view of Charlottesville Fashion Square. ]]
[[Image:Fashionsquareretail399 thumb.jpg|thumb|200px|Image from inside the mall. OMG!!! A [[Hex Bawx]] Store!!!]]

'''Charlottesville [[Fashion]] Square''' is the home of [[Chris]]'s [[Love Quest]] exploits. He was banned for loitering, but the year long ban has since expired. However, Chris's track record suggests a second ban is imminent. He is fixated with it, encouraging all fans or interested people to meet him there.

Fun fact: The mall was also used in the Tom Clancy book ''The Teeth of the Tiger'' as the scene of an Islamic [[terrorist]] act. The only relevance this has with Chris is that he also caused terror there himself to many [[gal pal|YOUNG LADIES]] and [[jerkop|security guards]].

==Chris and the Fashion Square==
It was in this mall where Chris met [[Anna McLerran|Anna]] and the [[Tale of the Crazy Pacer]] got its start.

It was here that he had his heart smashed down to 15% by [[Hanna]], and presumably where he (accompanied by [[Bob|his father]]) went on his "date" with [[Emily]], who was later rescued by [[The Man in the Pickle Suit]]. It's safe to say that, at one point, a large portion of Chris's time spent outside the house was at this mall.

Of course, he only rarely ventures outside these days to [[Father Call|shovel snow]] and do an occasional "[[Sonichu's Edge|parkay]]", so he may not have graced the halls of the Fashion Square with his presence in a while.

Regardless, due to the misadventures Chris had here, this place holds a significant role in Christory. Say "hi" to manager [[ScotPalazzo]] should you ever visit.

==Comic references==
===[[Sub-Episode 1]]: "Jerkop-tastropie"===
Dramatization of Chris getting busted by [[jerkop|mall security]] for loitering.

===[[Sub-Episode 2]]: "The Rise & Fall of My Heart"===
Dramatization of a [[Hanna|girl who works at a Starbucks]] trolling Chris by taking him out on a date.

==See also==
*[[CWCville Shopping Center]]

==External links==
*[http://www.simon.com/mall/default.aspx?ID=117 Official website]
*[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlottesville_Fashion_Square Wikipedia article]

{{Stub}}
{{Places}}
{{CWCverse}}

[[Category:Attraction Locations]]

CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated

2010-07-23T01:55:29Z

Jerkop:

"'''CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated'''" (officially "'''CWC Update 03182009 More Updated'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] explains a few recent happenings, or the lack thereof. He expresses his hope that he'll win some ''[[Eye of Judgment]]'' tournament and get some special cards. He then goes on to make excuses for his predictable delays in turning out any new [[comic]] pages, and he makes a brief shout-out to his new [[sweetheart]] [[Ivy]].

On 19 March 2009, Chris deleted and re-uploaded this video with new footage seamlessly spliced in. This director's cut features a reworded shout-out to Ivy, either to correct the flubbing of her name in the first take or to express greater affection towards her. It also adds a statement regarding the incident with [[The Man in the Pickle Suit]] in front of the Eddie Bauer store, which had occurred earlier that day.

'''Official description:''' If I do not have the website back up by the Eye of Judgment Tournament's End, I will upload the comic pages to the comic page hosting site I have been made aware of, and will post the address alongside the following video then. Also, cucumbered people, the [[Jerkops|Police]] are onto your game now, after [[Emily#Chris.27s_first_date|that fiasco the afternoon of March 19 in front of Eddie Baur]]; Watch Your Backs.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated
| image = {{#ev:youtube|6PBBkMe7uzM}}
| Stardate = 18 [[March 2009]]
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:comics.png]] [[Comic|Comics]]
| Saga = [[Image:ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Captainfalconshirt.PNG]] Captain Falcon
| previous = [[Apology to Game & Hobby Place#Watch|Apology to Game & Hobby Place]]
| next = [[#Director.27s_Cut|CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated (Director's Cut)]]
}} </center>

{{quote|I have, uh, been delaying on the drawing…}}

===Transcript===

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: uh, March 18, 2009.

Uh… I am still working on the recovery of, uh, the webs—of the sonichuandrosechu.com website. But yeah, also I a—on the side, I am—on the side, I am working on the—warming up for the Eye of Judgment, uh, tournament which, uh, hopefully, I'll be in the top 100, where—if I am—I’ll be, uh, one of the 100 winners to, uh, get set of free promo cards including the more lo—uh, more lovely version of, uh, Eden the Prosecuted—Persecuted, uh, which is—wh—I forget one of those. Uh, anyway, uh…

Anyway, I have, uh, been delaying on the drawing of new comic pages since the website fell down, but, uh, I will—like I said, I will continue to try to get it back up, and if I do not get the website back up by the end of the tournament, uh, I will upload the co—pages to this, uh, comic page hosting site that I have been made aware of. I have been made aware of that on a previous Internet chat even though, during the past couple of weeks, at least, I have not been on any Internet chats. Because of the trolls.

And also, I would like to give a shout-out to, uh… ''I’m Ivy!'' [?] And her friend Rachel across the hall from her at a college in these United States of America. So, uh, yeah, ho—so… if, uh, so if by the tournament then, I do not have the website back up, I will, uh, upload the pages to the comic hosting page as I have previously mentioned and—and, uh, I will upload a video onto the YouTube informing of y'all where those pages will be on that point.

Okay. So, uh, thank you for your patience and loyalty my, uh, loyal Sonichu fans. And, uh, y'all have a pleasant day. Take care.

==Director's Cut==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated (Director's Cut)
| image = {{#ev:youtube|JKL5KcM932c}}
| Stardate = 18 [[March 2009]]
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:comics.png]] [[Comic|Comics]]
| Saga = [[Image:ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Captainfalconshirt.PNG]] Captain Falcon {{ClassicShirt|text}}
| previous = [[#Video|CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated]]
| next = [[CWC's_Message_for_Ivy#Video|CWC's Message for Ivy]]
}} </center>

{{quote|I would like to give a shout-out to… ''Ivy''…}}

===Transcript===

[''video plays normally until "Because of the trolls."'']

[jump cut]

And also, I would like to give a shout-out to… ''Ivy'', sweet gal-pal of mine… [''blows kisses''] …and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!

[jump cut]

[''video plays normally until "…loyal Sonichu fans."'']

[jump cut]

And also, uh, a note from the Captain's Log on Stardate, uh, March 19th, 2009.

[''inhales sharply''] I would like to make it obvious that, uh, due to a recent ''event'' that has, uh, gone ''awry'' by an ''individual''…

[abrupt jump cut]

I—he has been reported to the police, as well as, uh, the owner of the store that—which he has emerged from. And so, you will be picked up by a police if, uh, you try to do anything else that's funny. So, watch your back.

Peace!

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Apology to Game & Hobby Place]]|nextlink=[[CWC's Message for Ivy]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-03-18]]

Transformers

2010-07-23T01:48:53Z

Jerkop: /* See also */

[[Image:SarahDeath.jpg|thumb|right|120px|[[Optimus Prime]], brutally murdering [[Sarah Jackson]].]]

[[Transformers]] are robots in disguise which are more than meets the eye. [[Chris]] has been fascinated with the Transformers since he was young. Even now, well into adulthood, he invests his Transformers toys with great significance, and Transformers have become a major presence in his [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]].

==Transformers in Chris's life==
While Chris isn't a dedicated collector, the jumbled mass of crap that fills his room includes several Transformers toys. Of particular note is his [[Optimus Prime]] toy, which he has often used as a sort of totem to reinforce his heterosexuality. When [[Clyde Cash]] forced him to "admit" that he was gay, Chris held his Prime toy tightly throughout [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|the video in question]], which he later explained was a way of asserting his straightness in spite of his words.

In [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]], Chris compares his Transformers and [[My Little Ponies]] as ways of studying the traits of the opposite gender and using them as [[Fail|roleplay models]]. It's possible that Chris really does practice what he preaches, and might pick Transformers and My Little Ponies as comforting remnants of his (actual) childhood from the '80s and '90s. By sheer coincidence, an unaired Transformers PSA urged children to treat the opposite gender as equals and not to jump to stereotyped conclusions. Had it aired, who knows what could've happened? You know, besides Chris [[White knight emails|immediately disregarding good advice, as usual.]]

Some of Chris's favorite popular music comes from the soundtrack to the Transformers movie. He once recorded a [[Cwc dare|video]] of himself singing Stan Bush's "Dare," and downloaded a number of other songs from the soundtrack - like [[Parody|"Dare To Be Stupid" by "Weird" Al Yankovic]] - from [[List of Chris's Rhapsody.com downloads|Rhapsody.com]].

==Transformers in ''Sonichu''==
While they were not originally part of the Sonichu oeuvre, Transformers slowly creeped into the spotlight. [[Bagget]]'s "Decepti-clone" "Change-Bot" [[Crackder]] was the first to join the series, in [[Sub-Episode_7|Sub-Episode 7]]. Episode 20 introduced a flood of new Transformers, though, including [[Punchy|Punchy's]] motorcycle [[Prower]] and several others.

Chris's attempts at drawing Transformers are typically awful, but he does even more artistic violence to their famous logos. The Autobots' logo in CWCville is a light and dark striped circle, with a red and white checkered pattern on the inside and a red face on the center that barely resembles the Autobots' true logo. This odd logo is due to the fact that the Autobots in CWCville are also referred as "[[Samurai Pizza Bots]]" (swiped from another of Christian's favorite anime series, the [[Wikipedia:Samurai Pizza Cats|Samurai Pizza Cats]]), so the symbol is supposedly a pizza. But while the Autobots have to suffer the humiliation of being associated with pizzas, the Decepti-clones' logo is just plain idiotic; not bothering to redraw the [[Wikipedia:Decepticon|Decepticons']] symbol (probably it's far too complicated for our "artist"'s little mind), he just drew a weird spiked yellow shape filled with purple. It reads "The Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens", with the initials "PVCC" written with a green-apple color.

==Transformers elsewhere==
For reasons that remain difficult to determine, Chris chose to depict the 18-wheeler that killed [[Sarah Jackson]] with Optimus Prime's distinctive red and silver paint job. Either Chris intentionally drew a Transformer crushing his would-be sweetheart, or (more likely) the image just bubbled up out of his infamously limited imagination.

[[Sonichu Special 4]] features Chris shooting his rival [[CChanSonichuCWC]] with what looks very much like an early Megatron toy. The real-life version of the toy also appears in some of Chris's videos. In [[CWC is Angry]] he shot at a picture of [[Adam Stackhouse]] with the "gun," while in the [[War Paint Video]] he used it to threaten his enemies in general.

==See also==
*[[Samurai Pizza Bots]], Chris's failbots of [[CWCville]].
*[[Decepti-Clone|Decepti-Clones]], [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s failbots of [[Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens|PVCC]].
*[[Megatron pistol]]
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]
[[Category:Transformers]]

Decepti-Clone

2010-07-23T01:44:01Z

Jerkop:

[[Image:SAVBot.jpg|thumb|The [[English|Scroundral]] As Vessel. Totally original do not steal.]]

A '''Decepti-Clone''' is a robot featured in Chris' [[Sonichu]] comic series, starting in Issue 9, Episode 20. According to the [[CWCipedia]], the three robots are said to be total knockoffs of various [[Wikipedia:Decepticon|Decepticons]] from the popular ''[[Transformers]]'' animated series, comics and movies, created by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]] as their own personal Transformer force.

They originated in, which is to say Chris stole them from, the Transformers video game for PS2 as weak, mass-produced enemies that could be killed in droves by the player character so as to reserve actual Decepticons for boss encounters. You know, like [[Jerkops]].

== Decepti-Clone Roles ==
As mentioned, Decepti-Clones serve the PVCC, so their mission is to go out and squash true love wherever it shows up in CWCville. The [[Jerkop Punislav|Punislavs]] mainly seek to transport the various Jerkops to their destinations, while the S.A.Vs and Crackders do the work on their own.

Interestingly enough, it has been shown that at least one member of a group of S.A.V.s sports a crown not unlike the one Starscream wore in the original Transformers movie. Interestingly, the crown isn't used to denote leadership of the entire race, but leadership of a small group, like the antennas used with Zeon Mobile Suits from the Mobile Suit Gundam series.

== Known Decepti-Clones ==

*S.A.V. (Scoundrals as Vessels) - Resembles Megatron (Generation 2).
*[[Crackder]] - Resembles Thundercracker (Transformers Animated ver.)
*[[Jerkop Punislav|Punislav]] - Resembles Barricade (Transformers 2007 movie ver.)

== Sauces ==

*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Scoundrals_As_Vessels Scoundrals As Vessels]
*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Crackder Crackder]
*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Punislav Punislav]

== See also ==

*[[Transformers]]
*[[Samurai Pizza Bots]]

{{Template: Stub}}
{{Template: Incomplete}}

S.A.V.

2010-07-23T01:39:36Z

Jerkop: Redirected page to Decepti-Clone

#REDIRECT [[Decepti-Clone]]

Scoundrals As Vessels

2010-07-23T01:38:56Z

Jerkop: Redirected page to Decepti-Clone

#REDIRECT [[Decepti-Clone]]

Decepti-Clone

2010-07-23T01:35:26Z

Jerkop:

File:SAVBot.jpg

2010-07-23T01:33:13Z

Jerkop: Transformer ripoff.

Transformer ripoff.

Encyclopedia Dramatica

2010-07-23T00:08:57Z

Jerkop: /* See also */

<center>{{#ev:youtube|p03W5ElzdGI}}</center>
{{quote|ED contributors are ED shitheads and express ED hatred.|What [[Vivian]] makes Chris say in the epic video above, summing it up quite nicely.}}

'''Encyclopedia Dramatica''' (or as Chris says it, the [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|"Ensykapeia Dramakka paysh"]]) is the [[Internet]] slander factory, created and led by [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Girlvinyl these] [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Joseph_Evers guys]. It's home to the [[Chris-chan]] page that introduced Chris to the Internet at large and made him a popular target for [[trolling]]. Chris has denounced the ED page in several of his videos, claiming it is filled with "VICIOUS LIES AND SLANDER."

==Chris on ED==
After a considerable amount of trolling and bitching and uploading hideous pornographic images, including the disastrous [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]], Chris posted this gem on the ED talk page:

{{quote|I AM ADDING THE [[Rule 34|POSITIVITY]] THIS HELL-HOLE OF A WEBSITE NEEDS; you just do not appreciate the POSITIVITY I AM ADDING TO THE PAGE. What I am doing is a STAND against OFFENSIVE, UNNATURAL, UNREQUIRED [[Pickle|Additions]] to ANY Female Image. What I am doing is a STAND for EVERY SINGLE WOMAN Everywhere, because NO WOMAN would EVER want such a Horrific Twist of Fate. What I am doing is a STAND against the VERY THING that is NOT FUNNY AT ALL!!!!!!!

So, Draw Breasts, [[china|Vaginas]], Uterus, Ovaries and the God-Given Eggs within them, you Two-Inch Short Dick-HEADS!!!!!!!!

Sincerely, Christian Weston Chandler, A Man For The Women, For the [[Women's Rights]], For the Women's Justice, For the Women's Peace.

P.S. [[Chris and hypocrisy|Grow a BACKBONE and GO ASK WOMEN OUT AS WELL, YOU TROLLS!]]}}

Chris then returned, admitting defeat after his tard rage:

{{quote|Months ago, I have found from this page being the first of a number hate against me, Christian Weston Chandler. *[[sigh]]* Among the number of you all, my name has been dragged through the mud, my e-mail and MySpace have been hacked for the e-mail information and random information that have been twisted into mockery of [[obesity|my person]], [[Chris and sex|my integrity]], [[List of Chris's lies|my honesty]], [[Ryan Cash|my compassion]], [[heart level|my heart]], [[Chris and religion|my soul]], [[autism|my being]]. Not only that, but the names of my two best gal-pals, [[Megan Schroeder]] and [[Anna McLerran]], and my Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon, [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]], have also been dragged through the mud of mockery along with mine. Not only were [[heart level|my feelings were hurt greatly]], but also those of [[Megan]] and [[Anna]], and a number of my acquaintances within my small social circle were shocked and terrified that such [[trolls|cruelty]], such [[pickle|mockery]], such [[homos|hatred]] was built from the number of those who have added more and more to this disgrace of a description of my [[autism|being]].

For a while, I was angry and enraged, and I shoved information and drawings regretfully drawn beyond my personal boundries down the throat of the webmasters of the page, in attempt to kill the hype and hatred against me. But No More, I give up on trying to edit the page to be more positive, or to delete the page altogether.

But I have ONE Question, that I put unto you all, the individuals who have taken part in creating this web page, and I would appreciate an Open, Detailed and Honest Answer from each of you in simple e-mails or reply on this discussion page.

[[Frequently Asked Questions|Why do you hate me so much?]]

What did I do against you to cause the hatred against me? What physical or emotional harm have I ensued unto you? Why do you hate me for being myself in this world full of people who can't help but be themselves? I've had nothing against any of you. I don't even know any of you personally, as far as I know. I have nothing that any of you have already, so Why?

I leave you with that to ponder and ponder again over.

Sincerely;

Christian Weston Chandler.}}

After the late summer of 2008, Chris largely gave up on direct involvement with ED. Around the spring of 2009, he may have posted one or two comments on the ED talk page referring to [[Clyde Cash]], however. The first is below. It was deleted fairly quickly.

{{quote|I have learned that there was a connection between her and a state in Washington where some of you have been lurking, and that she was not found in any public records. It took me a week to recover from the [[heart level|crestfallen emotions]], but I am moving on with my life.

Also, you'll have to catch me IRL ONLY to [[troll]] me any further. [[fangs|Do you dare?]]

Peace-Out, Christian Weston Chandler

--ChrisChanSonichu 22:54, 14 May 2009 (UTC)}}

There was some dispute over it actually being Chris until he himself confirmed it in the post that followed:

{{quote|Hey, [[Clyde Cash|CLYDE]], you JERK. I said "IN REAL LIFE", not [[PS3|Playstation]]. Also, why don't you be the man you CLAIM to be and face me yourself? You keep sending out your prawns to do your dirty work, you coward. >:-(

Christian C.}}

According to Clyde, the above entry was deleted after roughly a minute, probably due to Chris realizing that if he were to ever arrange to meet Clyde, he'd only send his parents anyway.

==ED on Chris, his article, and his article's talk page==
[[Image:Drycow.PNG|thumb|right|Uploaded 12 December 2008, before the new comic, [[Miyamoto]] saga, and [[BlueSpike]] saga]]
For several months prior to the events of the [[BlueSpike]] saga in early 2009, many thought that Chris had dried up, that Chris could go no further. Furthermore, the [[Blanca Weiss#FCTC|FCTC]]'s posting of new pics of Chris's bent [[duck]] in December 2008 prompted an ED admin to lock the talk page and demand satisfaction:

{{quote|MINE: What this talkpage is. If you guys continue your faggotry after this protection expires today I will lock it down longer, and then eventually permanently.| Arguecat3, now former ED sysop, 04 December 2008}}

{{quote|I say we just delete it. Along with the archives | Zaiger, now former ED sysop, 05 December 2008}}

{{quote|Fuck this article and it's talk page. Stupid discussions unrelated to upkeep and editing are the only thing keeping this shit interesting. You guys take this shit WAY to srsly. Find another retard to stalk fgts|Zaiger, now former ED sysop, 10 December 2008}}

{{quote|Someone from the FCTC post real tits or cawk with timestamp or GTFO. I will lock both talk and article. Hell I may even delete it. You have 2 days.|Arguecat3, now former ED sysop, 05 January 2009}}

==April 1st, 2009==
[[Image:ED April Fools' 2009.PNG|left|thumbnail|Screenshot of ED's front page.]]
[[Image:Chris-chan ED April Fools' 2009.PNG|right|thumbnail|Screenshot of the article.]]
On April Fools' Day 2009, the Chris-chan article was taken down and replaced with a message.

{{quote|This afternoon, we at Encyclopædia Dramatica have independently decided to remove the Chris-chan article about Christian W. Chandler from our site. We have also removed all references that slander, vilify, demean, or are found to be overly offensive. In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on far too long and gotten far out of hand. We have unfairly focused on him to the point of intruding in his private life and causing him great personal grief, which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is not in line with our site goals, and we never wanted something like this. Still, we must take complete responsibility for all our actions, both public and private. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.

We know that his public comments and his silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even his family. We deeply regret that. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors. First, by a desire to protect himself from the embarrassment of his own conduct.

He was also very concerned about protecting his family. The investigation moved on to his family and friends, then into his private life. And now the investigation itself is under investigation.

This has gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.

Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the article, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris' private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim his family life for his family. Even internet celebrities have private lives. It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national life. Our website has been distracted by this matter for too long, and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.

Now it is time -- in fact, it is past time to move on. We have important work to do -- real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.

And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the past two years, as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century.

Thank you. And good night.|ED, in a rare case of moralfaggotry.}}

Not surprisingly, the page was put back up on April 2.

==Chris's use of Encyclopedia Dramatica==
''See also [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]''

Chris tried to use ED to muster his personal army to go after [[Joshua Martinez]]. Obviously, nobody did what he asked. <ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&oldid=1997409947</ref> He also tried to create a page on ED for his "CCWC's Fanart of Horrors" (see: [[troll]] art), but a sysop immediately caught it and redirected it to an anti-Semitic template.

==Chris and ED today==
{{quote|I do think it is a little behind [[CWCki|cwcwiki]] [sic] on a few things, though, but that is to be expected.|[[Jason Kendrick Howell]] on the ED article today<ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan/JKH_Interview</ref>}}
With the explosion of organized Chris-trolling and resulting content in 2009, the ED page for Chris experienced another revival, but eventually devolved into an article that is packed with information, but does little to thoroughly and concisely explain the Chris-chan phenomenon to the untrained observer. ED, while once the primary source of new things Chris, is typically filled with newfags that make [[/cwc/|Krapplefags]] look brilliant — the kind who believe things like [[Ivy]] was Chris's blowup doll, [[The Miscreants]] is the actual name of a trolling group, Chris is self-diagnosed with Asperger's, etc. Fortunately, Chris looks to ED to find out what trolls are up to and therefore has a very warped picture of what is actually going on.

Mostly the ED article just reprints info from the CWCki, especially in recently added subpages which are verbatim copies of CWCki articles. Ironically, CWCki has had its links removed from the ED page altogether.

Trolls and general observers of Chris have since turned to [[CWCki]] to get a general picture of Chris that is less biased than ED (emphasis on "less"), and TV Tropes describes CWCki as being "''more accurate and slightly more SFW''" than ED.<ref>http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Sonichu</ref>

As for Chris himself, the ED page STILL bothers him to this day. An [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|entire page]] of Chris's website, established in December 2009 and updated afterward, is dedicated to "correcting" the evil ED article with his own TRUE and HONEST take on the situation. Naturally, it's all about how Chris isn't remotely responsible for anything he has done wrong, and how it's all the fault of his [[autism]] or those [[Trolls|DANG DIRTY TROLLS]].

==Sources==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)]]
*[[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
*[[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!]]
*[[4-cent garbage]]
*[[Chris-chan (forum)]]
*[[Christian's sex joke]]

==External links==
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan The TRUE and HONEST Chris-chan article]
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/User:Reldnahc Chris's ED account]

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Chandler Family Tree

2010-07-23T00:02:47Z

Jerkop:

This '''Chandler Family Tree''' includes pets and people [[Chris]] imagines to be related to him.

[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Ancient leader]] [[Anne Boleyn]],
[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|of the]] [[Anne Boleyn|Queen of England]]──────Mary Boleyn
[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Cherokee Clan]] │
│ ???
│ │
│ Richard Weston,
│ 1st Earl of Portland
│ │
│ ???
??? │
│ [[Daniel Weston]]
│ │
│ ???
│ │
│ ├────────────────────────────────────┬─────────┬─────────────────────┐
│ │ │ │ │
[[Bob|Robert]] [[Barbara|Barbara]] Jack Ran [[Aunt Corina|Corina]] Harriett Tom [[Minor_Family_Members#Uncle_Raymond|Raymond]]
???━━━━━┯━━━━━[[Bob|Franklin]]━━━━━┯━━━━━[[Barbara|Anne]]━━━━━┯━━━━━━Dale or Coleman [[Aunt Corina|Weston]] Ashby━━━━━Ashby [[Minor_Family_Members#Uncle_Raymond|Weston]]
│ [[Bob|Chandler Jr.]] │ [[Barbara|Weston]] │ Smithey Yeatts │
┌───────────┤ ┌─────┴─────┐ │ │
│ │ │ │ │ │
[[David Alan Chandler|David]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Carol]] [[Christopher's name change|Christopher]] [[cats]] [[Cole]] [[Minor_Family_Members#Jonathan_Carey|Jonathan]]
[[David Alan Chandler|Alan]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Suzanne]] [[Chris|Weston]] [[Cole|Smithey]] [[Minor_Family_Members#Jonathan_Carey|Carey]]
[[David Alan Chandler|Chandler]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Chandler]] [[Chris|Chandler]]
│ │
│ ┌─────┴─────┬───────────┬───────────┐
│ │ │ │ │
[[Savannah]] [[Patti]] [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]] [[Sonichu]]━━┯━━[[Rosechu]]
[[Savannah|Chandler]] [[Patti|Chandler]] [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Weston]] │
[[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Chandler]] │
┌─────┴─────┬───────────┐
│ │ │
[[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Cerah]] [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Christine]] [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Robbie]]

==Poké Family Tree==

[[Image:457-FamilyTreeTitle.JPG|thumb|Poké Family Tree]]
[[Image:456-FamilyTreeAndCar.JPG|thumb|Poké Family Tree]]

Chris drew his family tree in the form of [[Pokémon]].

Below is a transcription with the format ''Name / Date of Birth / Description / Culture and Pokemon''.

; Top row

* [[Cole Smithey]] / born 7.24.1969 / Likes to play drums. Movie reviewer for New York Newspaper / English Pilgrim Electabuzz
* [[Chris|Christian W. Chandler]] / born 2.24.82 / Likes [[Pokemon]], [[Sonic]], and [Mario?]. 12th Grade student at [[Manchester High]] / Pikachu with Both Pilgrim and [[Cherokian Clan|Native American]] garb.
* [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Carol Chandler]] / born 7.7.64 / Math wiz at college. / Native American Wigglytuff
* [[David Alan Chandler|Allen Chandler]] [sic] / born 12.2?.62 / ophthalmologist / Native American Alakazam

; Row 2

* Harriett Ashby / born ?.?.? / Administrative Assistant. Married to Tom Ashby / English Pilgrim Clefable
* [[Barbara|Barbara W. Chandler]] / born ?.?.? / ??? / English Pilgrim Nidoqueen
* [[Bob|Robert F. Chandler]] / born 2.9.1928 / Retired Engineer. Likes old music. / Native American Nidoking

; Row 3

* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Clefairy
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Haunter
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Vulpix
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Farfetch’d

; Row 4

* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Victreebell
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Fearow
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Dugtrio
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Jynx
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Porygon
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Jigglypuff
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Sandslash

; Row 5

* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Exeggutor
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Kadabra

; Bottom row

* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Hitmonlee
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Nidorina
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Persian

== See also ==

*[[Minor Family Members]]

[[Category:Family Members| ]]
[[Category:Lists]]

Chandler Family Tree

2010-07-22T23:49:30Z

Jerkop:

Chandler Family Tree

2010-07-22T21:54:52Z

Jerkop:

This '''Chandler Family Tree''' includes pets and people [[Chris]] imagines to be related to him.

[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Ancient leader]] [[Anne Boleyn]],
[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|of the]] [[Anne Boleyn|Queen of England]]──────Mary Boleyn
[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Cherokee Clan]] │
│ ???
│ │
│ Richard Weston,
│ 1st Earl of Portland
│ │
│ ???
??? │
│ [[Daniel Weston]]
│ │
│ ???
│ │
│ ├────────────────────────────────────┬─────────┐
│ │ │ │
[[Bob|Robert]] [[Barbara|Barbara]] Jack Ran [[Aunt Corina|Corina]] Harriett Tom
???━━━━━┯━━━━━[[Bob|Franklin]]━━━━━┯━━━━━[[Barbara|Anne]]━━━━━┯━━━━━━Dale or Coleman [[Aunt Corina|Weston]] Ashby━━━━━Ashby
│ [[Bob|Chandler Jr.]] │ [[Barbara|Weston]] │ Smithey Yeatts
┌───────────┤ ┌─────┴─────┐ │
│ │ │ │ │
[[David Alan Chandler|David]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Carol]] [[Christopher's name change|Christopher]] [[cats]] [[Cole]]
[[David Alan Chandler|Alan]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Suzanne]] [[Chris|Weston]] [[Cole|Smithey]]
[[David Alan Chandler|Chandler]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Chandler]] [[Chris|Chandler]]
│ │
│ ┌─────┴─────┬───────────┬───────────┐
│ │ │ │ │
[[Savannah]] [[Patti]] [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]] [[Sonichu]]━━┯━━[[Rosechu]]
[[Savannah|Chandler]] [[Patti|Chandler]] [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Weston]] │
[[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Chandler]] │
┌─────┴─────┬───────────┐
│ │ │
[[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Cerah]] [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Christine]] [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Robbie]]

==Poké Family Tree==

[[Image:457-FamilyTreeTitle.JPG|thumb|Poké Family Tree]]
[[Image:456-FamilyTreeAndCar.JPG|thumb|Poké Family Tree]]

Chris drew his family tree in the form of [[Pokémon]].

Below is a transcription with the format ''Name / Date of Birth / Description / Culture and Pokemon''.

; Top row

* [[Cole Smithey]] / born 7.24.1969 / Likes to play drums. Movie reviewer for New York Newspaper / English Pilgrim Electabuzz
* [[Chris|Christian W. Chandler]] / born 2.24.82 / Likes [[Pokemon]], [[Sonic]], and [Mario?]. 12th Grade student at [[Manchester High]] / Pikachu with Both Pilgrim and [[Cherokian Clan|Native American]] garb.
* [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Carol Chandler]] / born 7.7.64 / Math wiz at college. / Native American Wigglytuff
* [[David Alan Chandler|Allen Chandler]] [sic] / born 12.2?.62 / ophthalmologist / Native American Alakazam

; Row 2

* Harriett Ashby / born ?.?.? / Administrative Assistant. Married to Tom Ashby / English Pilgrim Clefable
* [[Barbara|Barbara W. Chandler]] / born ?.?.? / ??? / English Pilgrim Nidoqueen
* [[Bob|Robert F. Chandler]] / born 2.9.1928 / Retired Engineer. Likes old music. / Native American Nidoking

; Row 3

* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Clefairy
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Haunter
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Vulpix
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Farfetch’d

; Row 4

* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Victreebell
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Fearow
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Dugtrio
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Jynx
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Porygon
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Jigglypuff
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Sandslash

; Row 5

* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Exeggutor
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Kadabra

; Bottom row

* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Hitmonlee
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Nidorina
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Persian

[[Category:Family Members| ]]
[[Category:Lists]]

Chandler Family Tree

2010-07-22T21:36:58Z

Jerkop: adjusted some text

This '''Chandler Family Tree''' includes pets and people [[Chris]] imagines to be related to him.

[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Ancient leader]] [[Anne Boleyn]],
[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|of the]] [[Anne Boleyn|Queen of England]]──────Mary Boleyn
[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Cherokee Clan]] │
│ ???
│ │
│ Richard Weston,
│ 1st Earl of Portland
│ │
│ ???
??? │
│ [[Daniel Weston]]
│ │
│ ???
│ │
│ ├────────────────────────────────────┬─────────┐
│ │ │ │
[[Bob|Robert]] [[Barbara|Barbara]] Jack Ran [[Aunt Corina|Corina]] Harriett Tom
???━━━━━┯━━━━━[[Bob|Franklin]]━━━━━┯━━━━━[[Barbara|Anne]]━━━━━┯━━━━━━Dale or Coleman [[Aunt Corina|Weston]] Ashby━━━━━Ashby
│ [[Bob|Chandler Jr.]] │ [[Barbara|Weston]] │ Smithey Yeatts
┌───────────┤ ┌─────┴─────┐ │
│ │ │ │ │
[[David Alan Chandler|David]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Carol]] [[Christopher's name change|Christopher]] [[cats]] [[Cole]]
[[David Alan Chandler|Alan]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Suzanne]] [[Chris|Weston]] [[Cole|Smithey]]
[[David Alan Chandler|Chandler]] [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Chandler]] [[Chris|Chandler]]
│ │
│ ┌─────┴─────┐
│ │ │
[[Savannah]] [[Patti]] [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]]
[[Savannah|Chandler]] [[Patti|Chandler]] [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Weston]]
[[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Chandler]]

==Poké Family Tree==

[[Image:457-FamilyTreeTitle.JPG|thumb|Poké Family Tree]]
[[Image:456-FamilyTreeAndCar.JPG|thumb|Poké Family Tree]]

Chris drew his family tree in the form of [[Pokémon]].

Below is a transcription with the format ''Name / Date of Birth / Description / Culture and Pokemon''.

; Top row

* [[Cole Smithey]] / born 7.24.1969 / Likes to play drums. Movie reviewer for New York Newspaper / English Pilgrim Electabuzz
* [[Chris|Christian W. Chandler]] / born 2.24.82 / Likes [[Pokemon]], [[Sonic]], and [Mario?]. 12th Grade student at [[Manchester High]] / Pikachu with Both Pilgrim and [[Cherokian Clan|Native American]] garb.
* [[Carol Suzanne Chandler|Carol Chandler]] / born 7.7.64 / Math wiz at college. / Native American Wigglytuff
* [[David Alan Chandler|Allen Chandler]] [sic] / born 12.2?.62 / ophthalmologist / Native American Alakazam

; Row 2

* Harriett Ashby / born ?.?.? / Administrative Assistant. Married to Tom Ashby / English Pilgrim Clefable
* [[Barbara|Barbara W. Chandler]] / born ?.?.? / ??? / English Pilgrim Nidoqueen
* [[Bob|Robert F. Chandler]] / born 2.9.1928 / Retired Engineer. Likes old music. / Native American Nidoking

; Row 3

* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Clefairy
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Haunter
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Vulpix
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Farfetch’d

; Row 4

* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Victreebell
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Fearow
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / English Pilgrim Dugtrio
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Jynx
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Porygon
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Jigglypuff
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Sandslash

; Row 5

* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Exeggutor
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Kadabra

; Bottom row

* ? / ? / ? / Native American Missingno
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Hitmonlee
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Nidorina
* ? / ? / ? / Native American Persian

[[Category:Family Members| ]]
[[Category:Lists]]

10 September 2009

2010-07-22T21:29:51Z

Jerkop:

"'''10 September 2009'''" (officially "'''09102009'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] utterly dismisses a possible interview with [[Wikipedia:Veronica Belmont|Veronica Belmont]] of ''[[PS3|PlayStation]] Magazine Europe'' as a troll, continuing to display his utter paranoia and control over what he wants to do and how he wants it. Just in case she ''isn't'' a troll, however, he assures her that he would happily agree to an interview on the grounds that she go to his house personally to request it from him. He then rambles incoherent compliments at her, presumably so she'd be more inclined to [[Kacey|come to his house and let him eat his own sperm off her chest]].

'''Official description:''' [none]

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 10 September 2009
| video = {{#ev:youtube|aPngnFDxQmA}}
| stardate = 10 [[September 2009]]
| subject = {{Video games|text}}
| shirt = {{RedShirt2|text}}
| previous = [[Sign_Destruction_Video| Sign Destruction Video]]
| next = [[Chris_dispels_videogame_rumors| Chris dispels videogame rumours]]
}}

===Transcript===

''[Chris is standing there, [[Gitar of Fail]] around his neck, [[High School ring]] flashed]''

[[Captain's Log]], Nine-Ten-Oh Nine. I have received a-- I recently received a phone call on the home phone, ah, from, ah, person that is supposedly of the ''PlayStation Magazine'' in, uh, Europe. Call came restricted, did not leave a call back number, did not call back later, so, she is assumed [[troll]].

I mean, if-a... ''[Stammers a lot]'' I would BELIEVE I was going to be interviewed for real for a magazine instead of a fake interview, I would believe it, IF Veronica Belmont of PlayStation Corp. PERSONALLY came to the front door of my house, here in [[Ruckersville, VA]], and ASKED me, and PERSONALLY asked me to an-- for an interview... ''[Nods head]'' I would gladly accept that.

But, anyway, Veronica, if you're watching this? ''[Thumbs up]'' You did an awesome job on ''[[Wikipedia:Qore (Playstation Network)|Qore]]'', keep it up. Really enjoyed, y'know, about, I mean, it was so cool, you know, you became an honorary Gamer Girl, I think it was, with that fancy shirt, I remember that, and all the other memorable moments since, you know, episode one. ''[Creepy smirk]'' And also, I like your recent interview with Jay Leno, that was good, and also I know you love ''[[Little Big Planet]]'', so, you know, I got a few levels up there on my PlayStation ID as [[Sonichu]], and thanks again for adding me as a friend. ''[Another thumbs up]'' You accepted my request.

''[Stares into space for a bit]''

So, anyway, with that, a—wah, leave everyone in peace to know that, I'm on to, ah—bdah, the trolls, I'm on to your game. I kn- I know you call your quote/unquote "interviews" to be false, so therefore - back off. And back off on everything else you're trolling doing because you're so trolling stupid.

Peace to everyone else, [[curse]] to the trolls.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Sign Destruction Video]]|nextlink=[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-09-10]]
[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

User talk:Champthom

2010-07-19T17:55:54Z

Jerkop: /* My jerkop status */ new section

Talk to me.

Be sure to check out the archives as well:

'''Archive:''' [[User:Champthom/Archive 1|1]] [[User:Champthom/Archive 2|2]] [[User:Champthom/Archive 3|3]] [[User:Champthom/Archive 4|4]]

==Upload page==
Thank you sir, your change is much appreciated. --[[User:Fuckingstupid|Fuckingstupid]] 12:43, 20 December 2009 (CET)

==Sonichu Franchise Games==

How about this: [[User:Dude/Sonichu_Franchise_Games]]

...replace these:
*[[Sonichu (game)]]
*[[John's Custom Gundam: Sisterly Rescue]]
*[[Pokémon:_Lightning_Version]]
*[[Sonichu_Adventure]]
*[[Sonichu_Advance]]
*[[EX-CWC]]
--[[User:Dude|Dude]] 05:47, 22 December 2009 (CET)

==Chris's First Interview==
I noticed on [[Talk:Chris-chan_Discusses...]] you asked for someone to mirror Chris's first interview on Youtube. I know that was a while back, <s>but as far as I can tell no one has actually done it yet</s>, so I went ahead and did it for you [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1U-4Mvc5LbM]. I hope you're pleased. --[[User:That Man|That Man]] 23:10, 27 December 2009 (CET)
*just noticed a while ago that it's aleardy been uploaded by The CWCville Library. I have no clue how I was so oblivious to that. --[[User:That Man|That Man]] 03:26, 28 December 2009 (CET)
:*I didn't notice this either, thank you for telling me about this though and I appreciate your effort anyways.
:*Also can't seem to find it on the CWCvilleLibrary...could you possibly post a link?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:49, 28 December 2009 (CET)

==Thanks, Champthom==
<nowiki>:)</nowiki> --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 09:53, 31 December 2009 (CET)

==New Hotness for Videos==
Take a look at this template for videos that [[User:NeoShadow]] made; it's really sweet. It can wrap around videos (in the middle of the page, where they are now) or it can be used as a sidebar.

*Template: [[Template:Infobox/video]]

*Centered example: [[User:Neoshadow/sandbox/Sonic_Sweepstakes]]

*Sidebar example: [[User:Neoshadow/sandbox/Sonic_Sweepstakes2]]

Thoughts? It's been on the [[CWCki:Priority_Listing|to do list]] for a while now, and we could get one or the other in place pretty quickly. The big question is which placement to use, and general style questions vis-a-vis the way it looks. Let us know! --[[User:Dude|Dude]] 09:43, 3 January 2010 (CET)
*I really like it, but there was some debate (I need to see where) over the usage of video infoboxes, as some people argued it's unnecessarily replicates information one can gleam from the article. However, I think your centered example might solve that as this is ultimately what we can use to replace just pasting the video in Video sections of articles. I think the "Made by" would be useless in 99% of situations (with the very few videos made by other people, such as the Watch and Win one, or the videos by Scarlet). Personally I like your infoboxes, but I'm not sure if everyone else likes it elsewhere.
:Best I'd do is mention this in the [[CWCki:Community_Portal|community portal]]. As I said, I think your centered example might be very useful and a nicer display than just a YouTube video in the video section. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 12:11, 3 January 2010 (CET)
*This add-on is useless and redundant if you ask me. There's nothing new here you can't read in the introduction of the video, in the video navigation bar and I don't see the need for the "Festive" icons. I respect the efforts but I am a K.I.S.S.-Type of guy. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 15:02, 3 January 2010 (CET)

==IMPOSTORS==

Hey Champ, this is the "dude" from the old CWCki... somebody claimed my nick in the three hours between Cogs fixing the captcha and me checking back in =( Is there anything we can do about this? I can still log into the old CWCki to prove my TRUTH and HONESTY, and I used the same email signing up here (this account) and there (the old "dude"). --[[User:Umad|Umad]] 05:12, 4 January 2010 (UTC)
*I'll consult with Cogs later tonight, as I'm not sure if we can kick this other "Dude" off and have you have his nickname, especially given that it's an extremely generic name someone could have chosen (like Anonymous or Nobody or some name like that) or if we can do this, if it is right in doing so. Now I am concerned that people might try to leech off the fame of others by signing up for accounts of previous CWCki users, either to jump start their e-fame or as a way of trolling, so I'll need a second opinion. If anyone wants to weigh in on the matter, by all means do so. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:57, 4 January 2010 (UTC)
**Yeah, it's pretty generic, but at the same time, I only signed up around October, so it wasn't generic enough to be taken by then. I am kind of surprised that somebody snapped it up so quickly, since I was pretty actively trying to get it back myself. I suppose it could be innocent, but it's still kind of frustrating. Thanks for looking into it. --[[User:Umad|Umad]] 14:52, 4 January 2010 (UTC)
can you give him the account back. i didn't know. i didnt think dude was gona be available, i though i got lucky. didnt mean to steal it, ill make another one [[User:Dude|Dude]] 00:26, 5 January 2010 (UTC)
*No problem Dude (see what I did there?). Okay, here's how this will go down - new Dude, when you get a new account, AIM or message me in IRC when you do. I will merge your current account into your new one. That will free up the username "Dude" and old Dude can register that way. rpoblem oslved. If there's any problems, you guys let me know because then I have to resort to Plan B. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 01:36, 5 January 2010 (UTC)
*New [[User:Dude|Dude]] has been [[Special:Contributions/Dude|inactive]] for about a week now... can I get my account back? --[[User:Umad|Umad]] 17:49, 9 January 2010 (UTC)
:*The new Dude needs to contact me so I can merge his old account into the new one, thus freeing up "Dude." If he doesn't respond in 24 hours or so, then contact me and I'll reset the password and give it over to you. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:57, 10 January 2010 (UTC)

== I'll not take this treachery sitting down! ==

You dare claim superiority over my powers as a great and terrifying wizard!? You shall soon see the error of your ways, good sir Champthom. I am a vengeful spellcaster, and I will rape you furiously in your sleep. [[User:Artiph|Artiph the Destroyer, Omniscient Archmage, bearer of the Grimoire of Destruction, whose powers by and large surpass that of the Great Wizard CrassCrab, Lord of the Seven Realm and Master of the Archane Black Arts of the Eleventh Trans-Dimensional Vortex]] 11:03, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

==Sup==
Have a job for me? You told me to get in touch... --[[User:Fuckingstupid|Fuckingstupid]] 19:38, 7 January 2010 (UTC)
*Well I was going to ask you to help upload images but people got onto that which is good.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:57, 7 January 2010 (UTC)
:*Coolio. On Another note, don't bother restoring my Jerkop status. I don't need it now seeing as how images have a MUCH higher ceiling. I'll stick around to improve articles and help people with images if they need it. --[[User:Fuckingstupid|Fuckingstupid]] 10:02, 8 January 2010 (UTC)

==SPECIAL MISSION==
I accept. Should I simply sign up for an account on Asperpedia and get started or what? --[[User:Fuckingstupid|Fuckingstupid]] 09:19, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
*Yeah, do that - sign up for an Asperpedia account and go zap to the extreme. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 11:17, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

==Just to let you know==

There's a new user who registered under the name ChristianWestonChandler. I am watching this account since it came online. I just don't get a good feeling about this. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 07:00, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

==Apologies==

Thank you for fixing that mistake, that was the first time I added a template so I really am horrible at it. --[[User:Hieghts503|Hieghts503]] 5:05 20 January 2010 (CET)

== Chris's resume ==

Would you please be so kind as to move this to [[Chris's résumé]] for the sake of more accurate spelling, and to satisfy the grammar nazi in me? If you don't know how to make the fancy és, just copy and paste mine. [[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]] 04:22, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
*Also, please to be deleting [[Chris and fame]]. Broken redirect. [[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]] 20:15, 31 January 2010 (UTC)

== A new Mailbag bombing==
Well, our dear Christian has now started giving a copy paste reply as his new method of rejection. And hes done it to Mike Jackson's widow. We had a quick discussion about that in the talk page, and we thought it'd be an idea for another mailbag thats just filled entirely with letters about this one subject. Like how we had a whole mailbag asking about Asperchu and stuff like that? I thought we could have another of those; Only this time have an entire mailbag of people calling him out for being such a prick and for still not properly ansewing letters. What do you think Champ? --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 18:59, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

* To amend that idea, I suggest having Sysop inform him of another pending legal issue that can only be averted if he gives full replies to each email--he can't use the "Inputed" response or delete the whole thing and replace it with a general response or else the site goes down again or something.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 19:32, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

* Agreed. We need some sort of cover from him rejecting it in any way. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 20:56, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

== [[Politics]] ==

Please to be deleting. Broken redirect. [[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]] 01:11, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

== Sandy Rosechu ==

Any idea why [[Sandy Rosechu]] is showing up in [[:Category:Templates]]? [[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]] 22:17, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
*Fixed it. The Squote template didn't have noinclude wrapped around its category. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 22:21, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
**That was my fault. --[[User:Mikhail Faulken|Mikhail Faulken]] 22:24, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

== halp ==

Yo [[Scampers|Champers]], could you derete this page here: http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/Template:Christory/March_07 ? It will be confus if it doesn't turn up as a red link. Sorry for mistake. [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 15:00, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

== YO! ==

Champ old boy, do you have sauce on [[:File:CWCinDailyProgressJuly142007.jpg|this]] here sniplet? It must have slipped right past me, and now I want to know what it is! [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 02:09, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

==Jerkops Anonymous==

Hey, Champthom. I've been in the mood to move a page or two recently, but my jerkop privileges were abolished with the move to CWCki 2.0. Would you mind reinstating them? [[User:Llort|Llort]] 03:14, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

== Cole Smithey ==

Don't you think an edit like [http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Z_%28film%29&diff=prev&oldid=344566166 this] seems too intentional to be an impostor? Never mind 30+ edits to the Cole Smithey article? [[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]] 18:13, 7 March 2010 (UTC)
==Re: Pic of Wallflower==
Is this ok? It was shopped and It looks less like a man
[[Image:ClydeandLovelyweather.jpg|thumb|right]]

-[[User:Psycatalyst|Psycatalyst]] 04:02, 15 March 2010 (UTC)

== Posse ==

Champ, I don't know if you still need monitors, but I have no life and lurk on the CWCki pretty much all day. Hit me up if you need me. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 04:06, 16 March 2010 (UTC)
*NO U. Srsly, contact me on AIM or IRC tonight. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:07, 16 March 2010 (UTC)

==Summaries==

Ok, so I will check. I've started trying to sort and format the summaries for each of the Mumbles, and it's March Mumble Madness, but I seem to have contradicted instructions (as I discovered having worked on ALL of them), by listing rather than writing a narrative. What is it you want exactly, so I can get on it ASAP. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 04:11, 18 March 2010 (UTC)22:40, 17 March 2010 (UTC)

==Article of the Now==

You wanted some sort of template to denote former articles of the now? [[Template:Articleofthenow|How's this?]] --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 19:58, 20 March 2010 (UTC)
*Clyde already made something, just need to incorporate it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:06, 20 March 2010 (UTC)
*Late to the party again. Never mind --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 20:23, 20 March 2010 (UTC)

== List of Chris' lies ==

Okay, I trust your judgment on this. Wasn't sure if cleanup or deletion was the better solution and it looks like I chose wrong. [[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]] 20:36, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

== Quality Control jerkops ==

Hey, I saw your comment re "Quality Control" jerkops, of which none seem to be active at this point. I think I could handle that. [[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]] 21:12, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

== Champ old boy ==

People want to update [[Fan:Sonichu: The Animated Series]], could you unlock it for a while? [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 09:12, 23 March 2010 (UTC)

== Userboxes ==
Is it cool for users to make new rewards\userboxes, like the Grammar Nazi and Assburgers ones, for instance? Some wikis I've edited on don't like for you to make new ones due to space or whatnot, and others let you go crazy with it. Just want to check beforehand. [[User:BubblegumPinkButler|BubblegumPinkButler]] 03:22, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
*Yeah, it's alright, just don't go too crazy by making a kajillion of them. Some of the useboxes, like the Jerkop, Admin, etc. are obviously protected and it's poor taste to award yourself awards like the Order of the Pickle, etc. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:44, 29 March 2010 (UTC)

==April Fool's Day==
Since its going to be april fools day when the ultimatum expires why dont we just shut down for 1 day and let chris think he's won.
I mean worst that can happpen is he forgets about us, or the best is that he actually makes a "victory over cwcki" vid.

and then bring it back on the 2nd with a big fuck you chris

user: DKD 15.13 GMT 31.3.10
* No. That's stupid. Chris will make a "HA HA I GOT U TROLLS" video and quit paying attention to us because he thinks we are gone. If we stay up, we will have our own FUCK YOU CHRIS simply because we're not down. This will make Chris angry, and angry Chris is funny.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 14:18, 31 March 2010 (UTC)

*Never compromise, even in the face of <strike>Armageddon</strike> April Fool's Day. Also, in the future, make a sub heading (it's two equal signs, then your text, followed by two equal signs). --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:32, 31 March 2010 (UTC)

This makes me worry now. What if Chris is pulling a long, convoluted April Fools prank, possibly the idea of a white knight? --[[User:Zehnfragezeichen|Zehnfragezeichen]] 16:18, 31 March 2010 (UTC)
*Don't be silly. The only White Knight who he listens to is Rocky, and even then, only just barely. And whats the chances that a church counsellor is going to come troll us? I think we're safe. Its almost certain that his plan consists of 'blank pages' and 'try to find and stab the webmaster' --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 16:32, 31 March 2010 (UTC)

How bout we say that both bob and snorlax are dead, and put 14 Branchland Court up for sale? {{unsigned|Dan Dash}}

*Please, for the love of God, sign your comments. It's four tildas (~) in a row. I'm tempted to start banning people (albeit temporarily) for those who can't learn how to sign their fucking posts. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:28, 31 March 2010 (UTC)

:*Champ's got the rage. Dan, would that actually get to Chris? Seems to me it wouldn't bother him that much. Also seems he's making himself trollproof by becoming detached from us. Thoughts? --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 23:04, 31 March 2010 (UTC)
:**He's not trollproofing himself at all, he's just fighting the urge to go online and complain about things. This is exactly like when we got him to make the comic--he was really diligent about it and when he missed a day he usually made up by posting two comics on the next. Flash forward two months and he's only releasing it in short bursts. He'll be back on his own in that time--less if he thinks Sonichu is being threatened. I suggest that someone put up an ad on CWCipedia that states that Chris has declared all Asperpedia comics cannon within the Sonichuverse. Or something about how Chris risks losing the "copyright" if he doesn't make visible use of it for more than two months.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 23:14, 31 March 2010 (UTC)

::*I'm not sure, he didn't even seem too angry when he discovered the Cwcipedia was devastated (now THAT would've been an April Fool's Day joke). Could it be that he's becoming numb to it? We've done almost everything we can to slander him, his family, and Sonichu. We've set up "sweethearts" toyed with him and, albeit inadvertently, brought about the end of his last IRL gal-pal. We sent the health department to his house, without effect, and have parodied Sonichu and Chris himself. What else CAN we do to this guy? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 23:17, 31 March 2010 (UTC)
::**We didn't call the health department on him and he never learns from his mistakes. We do it again and again. He's not getting desensitized at all, actually. We know most of his buttons now, we've just got to know when to push them. Oh, and every now and then Chris will do something to troll himself, and that's always worth a laugh.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 23:27, 31 March 2010 (UTC)
::*** But it's getting kind of cyclical, Chris gets a new sweetheart, he get's in love mood, phone calls are leaked, get lulzy videos and then, someone manages to anger him, he spews some death threats, then the sweetheart leaves/reveals as troll/dies and then we have sulk Chris, then he completely forgets about it and we have the smug Chris, and in between all that he makes a rant video once in a while. Pretty much we have seen everything chris has to offer for trolling.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 04:26, 1 April 2010 (UTC)

==General question==
Alright so Im a massive newfag here, and I'm wondering how do I create those tags on your pages? For example the eurofag and amerifag stuff. Can I create my own and upload them onto my user page?
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 23:55, 31 March 2010 (UTC)DKD 00:54 GMT 01.04.10
Templates.--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 03:20, 1 April 2010 (UTC)

== "Contact me ASAP" ==

What's going on? --[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 03:59, 1 April 2010 (UTC)
*Contact me privately. My info is on my use page, we can't discuss this openly. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:25, 1 April 2010 (UTC)
*I've tried to contact you through AIM before, but because I'm a cheapskate who can't use Windows software, I suspect AIM didn't work too well on my end. I'm now in IRC too. I hope this works better. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 10:36, 1 April 2010 (UTC)

==CWC superstar==
Which Chris video did you get mentioned in?

[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 12:55, 3 April 2010 (UTC)
*[[Bunny Hop|PYONG PYONG PYONG! HOPPY EASTER FOR]] [[Crass and Champ|CRASS AND '''CHAMP''']]. Technically he's referring to the crab named after me, so there should be an asterisk. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 01:24, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

==Artist for hire==

I would be pleased to help by uploading pictures on the CWCki. The problem is that I don't know where to start. There was a page with the needing drawings but it wasn't updated in quite a while.
I talked to Cogsdev on the irc #sonichu and was referred to you. I'm not new to the Cwcki, but I only registered only today.
Here's an example of what I can do, if it's good enough:
http://cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:Sonee_2.jpg --[[User:Blacksky01|Blacksky01]] 23:10, 13 april 2010

*I'd say that the [[Artist Commune]] for requested images is still current, so you can still try there. I'd say that the [[Mumble]] chats could use illustrations, mostly of illustrations to go with notable quotes from the chat.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:29, 14 April 2010 (UTC)

*Here's a pic for the IRC(16 october 2008) with 2 notable quotes from it. Since I'm not sure how to add it in a good way, I'll leave it to you.

http://cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:IRC(16_October_2008).jpg

I hope it's good enough, I kinda messed up the pedo-glasse since it was done from memory.
Also, how can I link my signature to my userpage?--[[User:Blacksky01|Blacksky01]] 13:44, 19 April 2010 (UTC)

*Here's another one, this time for the IRC (20 January 2009).

http://cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:IRC(20_January_2009).jpg

I tried doing the pedo glasses right this time. I'll leave this to you. Also, thanks for the edit Beat.--[[User:Blacksky01|Blacksky01]] 22:58, 19 April 2010 (UTC)

== Transcription Category ==

What are your views on a category for all articles containing transcriptions? It would make them easier to locate for maintenance or general interest IMO. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 22:42, 17 April 2010 (UTC)

== Question About Templates ==

Hey, I recently uploaded the 4 templates [[Template:Observer|Observer]], [[Template:Warrior|Warrior]], [[Template:Hero|Hero]], and [[Template:Legend|Legend]]. I was wondering what I should do with them( I'm not the best at using Wikis). Should I move them somewhere, edit them, etc.? Also, since you deleted two of the category pages, I was wondering if I should restore those or delete the other two. Sorry if there are any problems. --[[User:Alcoholic Legend|Alcoholic Legend]] 03:10, 18 April 2010 (UTC)

:Oh, also, just wanted to tell ya that I restored the two category pages for now (now all 4 are up instead of just 2/4). If you want me to change/move anything, I'll gladly do it. Just tell me what to do and I'll get it done. : ) --[[User:Alcoholic Legend|Alcoholic Legend]] 06:14, 18 April 2010 (UTC)

== Old Cats ==

As part of a revamp of userboxes and their categories, there's a lot of now [[Special:UnusedCategories|unused categories prefixed with "List of"]] that need to be deleted forever. Can you fix? --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 05:16, 26 April 2010 (UTC)
:There's a few more List of... categories that need nuking. You might have just got hand cramp or something :) --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 17:21, 26 April 2010 (UTC)
:*[[THAT IS MY HOUSE|I'M WORKIN ON IT!]].--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:10, 26 April 2010 (UTC)

== Deletion, moving and er, shit ==

To do with the Twitter stuff. I remember you saying something about Jerkop powers not extending to moving/deletion. Can I? --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 10:55, 28 April 2010 (UTC)

On a related note, I made a mistake on an [[Bill Lumburg/Fan:Sonichu 11|article]] I created and I'm trying to move it to my Userspace. Can you help me with this? I don't see a move option anywhere so I'm assuming only admins can do it. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 03:58, 2 May 2010 (UTC)
*Thanks for taking care of that. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 04:54, 2 May 2010 (UTC)

== New Performance Style ==

Made this and applied it to a few pages after discussion that in the latest video none of the templates reflected the performance style (unadulterated smugness). Probably should have run it by you before I added it to a load of videos, sorry about that. :(

{{Comeuppance.png|text}}

:The template has been named incorrectly (Should not have the .png). The icon doesn't seem to match the style of the others - most notably the eyes. And I personally still don't think comeuppance is the right name we should give the template, but that's just me. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 13:02, 8 May 2010 (UTC)

== Video Template ==

So I made a change to the video template last night which inserts a linked version of Chris's name on video templates when someone puts '''|maker= Chris'''. Do you think that since the template is intended for Chris videos, we can just make the maker default to displaying Chris's name and drop the |maker= line for most uses of the template - retaining the option to include it if we need to override it? I need to run this past someone before I start rolling it out.

Oh and I'm considering making the template parameters lowercase, as is common with templates. I could implement a way for the template to accept both while I transition each use of the template to use lowercase. Worth doing? (Some of the parameters are already lowercase - messy!) --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 21:31, 10 May 2010 (UTC)

==#sonichu ban/the stuff I was going to post==

Hey Champ, any word on the issues we discussed? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:16, 12 May 2010 (UTC)
*Thanks for reminding me, I asked canine and he was going to talk to cogs but never heard back. I'll check with her though, though tonight isn't the best night to do it (long story). --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:31, 12 May 2010 (UTC)
:*Not a problem mate, there's no rush. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 03:31, 12 May 2010 (UTC)
::*Contact me ASAP, just need to clarify something. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:43, 12 May 2010 (UTC)

==Quick Question==

Got something to ask you real quick. Will you be on AIM/IRC tomorrow? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 15:57, 15 May 2010 (UTC)
*Actually I'm gonna be out of town, but I'll be back Monday night.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:48, 15 May 2010 (UTC)

== Re: Glass vs Glasses ==

Wait what? Pretty sure glasses is what the majority of English speakers use when referring to a single pair of spectacles. It just looks stupid using "glass". --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 17:31, 17 May 2010 (UTC)

== Uhh...Champ? ==
You deleted the Facial Recognition talk page but not the page itself. Just saying. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:35, 23 May 2010 (UTC)

== A jerkop resignation letter ==

It appears that my furry background is raising a stir in /cwc/, and some people don't want me to post there. It does, however, bring another thing in my mind. I'd ask you to remove my jerkop bit. There's two reasons for this: First, if ''not'' having furries in positions of power helps some of the trolls to sleep better in the night, this course of action would help them. Secondly - and this is a far, far bigger reason - I'm not actually ''using'' the block/delete powers much, and having an account that needlessly has such powers is obviously a computer security risk. I don't think losing those rights would affect me that much as CWCki editor; I'm more concerned about site security and user happiness. Respectfully, --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 16:32, 29 May 2010 (UTC)
*I need to discuss this with Cogs first. I appreciate your selfless concern for the site but I'll be damned if /cwc/ tells me or Cogs how to run this site. What you do outside the CWCki is nobody's damn busy, to be honest. You are one of the finest CWCki editors we have, particularly because you have experience editing Wikipedia and I will not let you be intimidated by Internet fucktards at least on the CWCki. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:40, 29 May 2010 (UTC)
** Understood. I just have to add that this is one of those "last nail in the coffin" type things; like I said, the security issue is, in my opinion, ''far'' more important than the troll reaction. I'm thinking of all that ruckus that was caused by the hacked sysop accounts in Wikipedia a year or two ago. So please, if a policy needs to be made, it should be made on the security grounds, not trolling grounds. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 17:47, 29 May 2010 (UTC)
*** I saw the thread on the /cwc/ you are referring to. In my humble opinion, you shouldn't give them any power over what you do. If you identify with a paticular group on the internet, it's not important. You seem to be an important editor to this fine Wiki, so having a bit of power can't be wrong in your case. The opinions expressed by the "members" of the /cwc" imageboard aren't worth anything on the CWCkie. Also, an hacking attemp on your account seems highly unlikely if you don't let any clues on your password. But it's only my opinion on the matter, it ain't worth all that much.--[[User:Blacksky01|Blacksky01]]
**** I know. The whole situation in the thread was ridiculous. Me making the teensy bit of a mistake of being a namefag (I knew the pain threshold was low, but ''sheesh''), people spamming the thread with the (admittedly awful) drawings I drew years ago. (Careful readers might know that I ''specifically'' made a promise not to "spread the cancer" here. It applies to /cwc/ as well. But if the /cwc/ people wish to repost the godawful drawings, that's ''their'' headache.) The only real effect the thread has had on me, personally, is that I've tried to objectively evaluate some of the things that actually ''do'' suck: I mopped my user page of the rambling and put it in subpages, replaced some of the drawings on my home page (damn, those were old and awful) and I have to rethink the promotion strategies for my webcomic, since that is obviously not working. I still stand by the security concerns, but if Champ and Cogs don't think it's an issue, then I promise to not use the block/delete tools for anything heinous, as was the case before. =) --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 14:02, 30 May 2010 (UTC)

== Trouble in Asperpedia ==

I've just gotten confirmation that the recent confusion in Asperpedia is being caused by vandals [http://hsienko.com/asperchu/index.php?title=User_talk:IsabelMonday#HI_GOD_MORNING]. Now I know you've got no power over at Asperpedia, but if they've taken the admin accounts there's nothing they can really do, and I was hoping you might have connections with someone who could help take the site back. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 18:02, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
*Mao is a [[Wikipedia:trickster|trickster]], beware of his cunning. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:03, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
**Well if it's a trick, its still pissing me off. I just made a project proposal to him and he answers by deleting all the fan content. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 18:05, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
::*Have you considered the possibility he is TROLLING YOU BACK? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:07, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
:::*Not if he was destroying everyone else's fan content. That's just too extreme for trolling one person. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 18:09, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
::::* Admins can undelete deleted content so it could be an elaborate troll. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 18:35, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
:::::* I'm aware of that, in fact my first thought was that Mao was taking a piss all over me, until I saw he was deleting the entire fan portal and not just my content. I'll just have to wait and see what happens. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 18:36, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
::::::*Wait, your telling me that this is the actual Mao doing this? --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:01, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
As Champ said, you cannot rule that possibility out knowing Mao's traits. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 19:04, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
:Yeah, but I never thought Mao would do something like this. This is extreme even for him. And he's deleting Asperchu too. And he's talking about /b/ and people's passwords. And the toher admins are acting like that too. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:06, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
::* He set his password to '''password''' (no, seriously) and some asshat got in his account. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 19:47, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
::** *Facepalm* --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:57, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
{{quote|That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! It's like what a moron would set on his luggage!|<s>Mel Brooks</s> Rick Moranis couldn't have said it any better.}}

==Talk pages==

I think we should start looking at temporary bans for user who continue to use article talk pages for personal discussion. It's out of control. --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 03:19, 23 June 2010 (UTC)

* He edited his page to change someone's comment to something compromising. When I called him out on it, he did that to me too, and then faked my signature on another compromising comment. Then again, I "had it coming" as you said. --[[User:16BitAlex|16BitAlex]] 03:24, 23 June 2010 (UTC)
*I don't like being involved in others peoples' problems but Delabonte is abusing his power while being hypocritical. look at the history in his talk page.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 03:50, 23 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Delabonte is neither a jerkop or admin, he has no real powers aside from being here for a while. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:54, 23 June 2010 (UTC)

*I don't like it either. Not that I disapprove of the Not a Forum template--those are prefectly justified on any non-user talk page. There's usually a thread over on the appropriate channels anyway, so it's not like it's a big deal. I just don't understand why it should apply to user talk pages.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 04:04, 23 June 2010 (UTC)

:I was talking about '''article''' talk pages, not '''user''' talk pages, but out of respect for 16BitAlex I have removed the offending article from the talk page and put it on my userpage. --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 04:05, 23 June 2010 (UTC)
::Partly my fault for not reading fully. But, if it was truly out of respect you would have removed the "offending article". You are right on Not A Forum for ''article'' talk pages. If only there was a forum that CWCki users could use. In fact, there ''was'', until the powers that be at a certain private forum thought that a public forum was a bad idea. --[[User:16BitAlex|16BitAlex]] 04:22, 23 June 2010 (UTC)
::when i said abusing your power i didn't mean the "NOT a forum thing". i understand my mistake regarding that. what i meant was the editing anonymax's and 16alex's comments on your usertalk after you told alex he could not delete the vandalism from his userpage.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 04:40, 23 June 2010 (UTC)

:*Dudes, there's still [[Krapple|/cwc/]] and [[EDF]] (if you're totally desperate). Fuck, you can make your own forum, just don't go about declaring how you're gonna rip stuff off from PVCC or try to overtake PVCC. Fuck, hang out in [[Sonichu (IRC)|#sonichu]] and they'll let you in PVCC if you're not a faggot. Point is, CWCki isn't the place for this sort of talk - it's distracting and there's better places to do this.
::I mildly tolerate it since once people get warned, they (usually) tend to start and it's hard to keep track of repeat offenders. I think I've temporarily banned someone who was a repeat offender once but as I said, it's hard to keep track of people who do that sort of shit over again.
::I really haven't seen this as a huge problem on article talk pages, and in the past I have threatened bans for trivial discussing that was getting out of control but for one or two people commenting I can sorta deal with. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:54, 23 June 2010 (UTC)

Champ, I think you should look into Delabonte again. I tried warning him about not starting a flame war, but he just started vandalizing other people's comments on his talk page. This kind of behavior isn't tolerated here. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 13:08, 25 June 2010 (UTC)
*Cogs has spoken to me, the issue has been resolved. As usual, in her favour. --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 14:47, 25 June 2010 (UTC)

==I just counted==
For some reason, I'm doing this lately. You have, as of this writing, made 8925 edits to the CWCki, based on your contributions page. No joke. Thought you ought to know. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 00:29, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
*1) that's because I'm an admin, 2) most of my admins are me failing to preview and tiny shit 3) mostly talk page edits. Fun fact - my user page is the most linked page on CWCki because I comment on like every talk page. But yeah, I spend way too much time here. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:32, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

== Yo ==
Champ! Do us all a favour and ban JESUS would you? --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:57, 2 July 2010 (UTC)

== You said to direct questions to you. So... ==
How in the fuck is that Coffee Place article a confirmed CWC sighting? Where in that photo is Chris or Bob, because I can't see shit? What does any of the text have to do with Chris or any sighting of any kind for that matter? Why does Clyde believe it's a confirmed CWC sighting? What evidence have we got? And why are you and Clyde so certain that this user's word alone can be trusted to the point of threatening bans for questioning them, when they haven't really given us any real proof of anything?

I really, really, REALLY hope that i'm just retarded and missing something obvious, because this makes NO sense to me whatsoever. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 02:03, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
:shut the fuck up edward [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 02:06, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
*To clarify, I'll be glad to address any questions on a one-on-one basis in IRC or via AIM.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:07, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
**I've also got a question I need to ask you in IRC.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 02:21, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
*I can't use IRC. My computer fucks up whenever I try, and believe me I have tried. Why am I never allowed an actual answer when I ask a question? --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 12:21, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
*You are thicker than liquid cement, Edward. Email me at origins.intervention@null.net so I can enlighten you. --[[User:Jump|Jump]] 16:11, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
*It's not sending. I keep trying to send a message and I keep getting a notification email telling me that they couldn't send it for some reason. Are you sure that's the right email address? --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 17:30, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
**Can I cover this, Champ?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 17:52, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
::*Go ahead, or Jump is sure to enlighten you as well, Edward.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:58, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
***Try my alterate, the.new.chemical@gmail.com --[[User:Jump|Jump]] 18:32, 4 July 2010 (UTC)
:I did actually maange to get a message through to Jump's alternate account. I'm waiting for his response right now. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 21:00, 4 July 2010 (UTC)

:Everything's sorted now. Thanks again Jump. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 15:54, 7 July 2010 (UTC)

== irc ==

<s>Yo, Champ, I'm trying to join #sonichu but I get a message that says the hostname could not be resolved, and when I do get in, it says I have to identify a registered name. I'm using Mibbit and I already have an account there, and whenever I use the link at our Mibbit article, there's no one on. What am I doing wrong? Sorry for being a total newfag.</s> nevermind, sorry for annoying you-[[User:Hiiro|Hiiro]] 17:08, 5 July 2010 (UTC)

==Ban me==

I'm evading a permaban. Jesus Christ. Do your fucking job, sandnigger.--[[User:JerryMathers|JerryMathers]] 00:03, 8 July 2010 (UTC)

== We need some clarification ==

On the community portal you said "do not interfere with Jenkins" which I simply took to mean "do not fuck with him" or "let him work on his report unimpeded." Delabonte, on the other hand, claims you meant zero communication and is putting up some userbox on everyone's page who posted on his talk page. All I did was point him to he userbox list after someone suggested it to him. Could you please clarify for everyone's sake what you specifically meant?

Also, I think the 'fuckwit alert' box is unwarranted; seriously, why would the PVCC care about a harmless mistake, let alone monitor such 'criminals'? And if I really had broken your rule, me and the other users would have been banned by now, wouldn't we? Some of those comments had already been put up for days without incident. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 04:49, 12 July 2010 (UTC)
*I took it to mean "Don't do anything that doesn't appear to be approved". I followed that to the letter and I intend to follow the proper instructions now that I've been notified. However, I think the userbox was an overreaction.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 05:16, 12 July 2010 (UTC)

I think your userboxes are very fitting and you wear them well. [[User:DrShoggoth|DrShoggoth]] 05:55, 12 July 2010 (UTC)

*As we want Jenkins to keep up the good work, the idea is more of the former - to not hinder his work, i.e. not to post too many praises on his talk page. I'm not sure what's been going on as I've been out the past two days or so, but I'm guessing people may have lost control and completely praised Jenkins, especially for getting a seinor cheerleader. I can understand where Delabonte is coming from but srsly, don't be a dumbass when it comes to this sort of thing.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:25, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

==Regarding the 'Relics of fail' items.==
Right now, out of 26 different relics, a total of 10 of them have the suffix "of fail". I think that the 'of fail' tag on the end of many of the items is a bit stale. Not only does it make them all seem generic and without personality, but 'of fail' just seems kind of juvenile. I'd like to start a vote to change the majority of the names to give them more flair, so they stand out more. Talked about it in IRC a few nights ago, and the consensus seemed to agree. One of the names thrown around was to change "Plush Boobs of Fail" into something along the lines of "Plush Boobs of Repressed Sexuality." Give them names that indicate their use, descriptors that tell you about the item before you even read about it. "Pokewalker of Sloth" or "Pokewalker of Inactivity". Even if the 'of fail' tag is supposed to indicate that Chris created it himself, there's no reason for the Plush Boobs and Sailor Moon Poster to have it included. Let me know what you think. [[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 06:55, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

I concur with Brofose. Fail has become a bit of a lame old meme, and while it is one of the most apt words to describe anything about CWC, I believe the Relics would do well to be assigned new titles. [[User:DrShoggoth|DrShoggoth]] 07:08, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

:I don't really mind the "of fail" but I wouldn't miss it either.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 12:30, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

I think this sounds like a pretty good idea. Perhaps we should consider some kind of formal way to do this. Like, we could have something in the community portal for users to suggest new suffixes, then from those like 5 favorites are picked out and a poll is taken for the new suffix. --[[User:ThatMan|ThatMan]] 22:00, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

== Thanks ==

Thanks for pointing that out. Also, I'd like to talk to you about something regarding some recent edits. [[User:CrassCrab|CrassCrab]] 19:23, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

== Welcome Template ==

The welcome template no longer requires any parameters - but it works better if substituted. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 02:05, 15 July 2010 (UTC)

== My jerkop status ==

A week ago, Cogs temporarily removed my jerkop status (for deleting [[Template:UnderWatch|this]] template), but said I could ask you to give it back to me after a week or so [[User_talk:Cogsdev#About_deleting_that_template|here]]. So now I'm just asking you if I can have it back, please.--[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 17:55, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

User talk:Jerkop

2010-07-16T22:42:16Z

Jerkop: /* bagget */

== You're a jerkop ==

I figure with a name like yours, you'd be the ideal candidate for one. So yeah, go forth, stop vandalism, and don't abuse your powers for personal gain. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:00, 21 March 2010 (UTC)
*Thanks! And don't worry, I'm not going to abuse anything.--[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 20:04, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

== Contact me ASAP ==

This is URGENT. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:57, 1 April 2010 (UTC)

== Please IM me ==

Champ told me to contact you and the other Jerkops. My AIM is LittleLazyLime. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' 05:55, 11 July 2010 (UTC)

== Under Watch Template ==

Unless Champ or cogs told you to take that down it should probably be reinstated as it existed for a reason: To mark people (mainly asperpedians) who were potentially going to make an issue with the current operation. [[User:DrShoggoth|DrShoggoth]] 06:10, 12 July 2010 (UTC)

== bagget ==

why do you keep deleting my shit? You insist on having extremely homophobic generalizations in a wiki article - and support unscientific armchair psychology which is clearly biased?

There is no correlation between female initiated anal play and homosexuality. Having female friends does not make you gay. Liking shitty music is not correlated with being gay.

Likewise, there is no reason to believe that Chris is abusing alcohol. You choose to document the few times he has used alcohol but will not record the fact that he has been abstaining from alcohol in situations where drinking is rampant (fridays after five). --2litrepop

: First off, learn to sign your posts correctly. Secondly, don't take this wiki to seriously. It's about a retarded fat kid for GodBearJesus sakes. Just take it calm, and don't get worked up over petty shit. That's my advice to you --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 22:24, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

: First of all, trying to make Chris look less of a shitty human being than he really is makes you look like a white knight. Also, we know that Chris drinks and there's no reason for us to think he just stopped. Because there's no evidence of him drinking at a particular event does not mean that he stopped. Finally, Chris is pretty gay. That's a fact.--[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 22:28, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

:I agree with 2litrepop in some instances when it comes to Chris and homosexuality, with there seeming to be a heavy bias towards definitely labeling Chris as gay. In my opinion this is a ridiculous claim. Chris is not gay, just clueless about how sexuality works. For example, Chris believes that it is possible to be ''persuaded'' to become a homosexual, also thinking that you could be gay just by thinking about dicks. Chris isn't gay. He's just a moron.
As for the other shit that 2litrepop did it all seems rather irrelevant and speculative. [[User:CrassCrab|CrassCrab]] 22:28, 16 July 2010 (UTC)
::That's true. Maybe the section's title should be changed to something like: "Evidence that Chris looks like a homo" or "Why Chris appears to be gay"--[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 22:40, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

ok - forget this site, you are clearly more interested in making an EncyclopediaDramatica clone, rather than accurately and objectively recording things. My speculation in the alcohol article was useless, but it was only to offset the obvious bias that was written in that article. Having one beer an hour before driving is not DUI. The amount of alcohol consumption Chris exhibits is nowhere near abuse potential. I should realize me editing the homosexuality page here would be like editing one on ED. I didn't realize this site was a joke.
--2litrepop

User talk:Jerkop

2010-07-16T22:40:10Z

Jerkop: /* bagget */

== You're a jerkop ==

I figure with a name like yours, you'd be the ideal candidate for one. So yeah, go forth, stop vandalism, and don't abuse your powers for personal gain. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:00, 21 March 2010 (UTC)
*Thanks! And don't worry, I'm not going to abuse anything.--[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 20:04, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

== Contact me ASAP ==

This is URGENT. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:57, 1 April 2010 (UTC)

== Please IM me ==

Champ told me to contact you and the other Jerkops. My AIM is LittleLazyLime. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' 05:55, 11 July 2010 (UTC)

== Under Watch Template ==

Unless Champ or cogs told you to take that down it should probably be reinstated as it existed for a reason: To mark people (mainly asperpedians) who were potentially going to make an issue with the current operation. [[User:DrShoggoth|DrShoggoth]] 06:10, 12 July 2010 (UTC)

== bagget ==

why do you keep deleting my shit? You insist on having extremely homophobic generalizations in a wiki article - and support unscientific armchair psychology which is clearly biased?

There is no correlation between female initiated anal play and homosexuality. Having female friends does not make you gay. Liking shitty music is not correlated with being gay.

Likewise, there is no reason to believe that Chris is abusing alcohol. You choose to document the few times he has used alcohol but will not record the fact that he has been abstaining from alcohol in situations where drinking is rampant (fridays after five). --2litrepop

: First off, learn to sign your posts correctly. Secondly, don't take this wiki to seriously. It's about a retarded fat kid for GodBearJesus sakes. Just take it calm, and don't get worked up over petty shit. That's my advice to you --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 22:24, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

: First of all, trying to make Chris look less of a shitty human being than he really is makes you look like a white knight. Also, we know that Chris drinks and there's no reason for us to think he just stopped. Because there's no evidence of him drinking at a particular event does not mean that he stopped. Finally, Chris is pretty gay. That's a fact.--[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 22:28, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

:I agree with 2litrepop in some instances when it comes to Chris and homosexuality, with there seeming to be a heavy bias towards definitely labeling Chris as gay. In my opinion this is a ridiculous claim. Chris is not gay, just clueless about how sexuality works. For example, Chris believes that it is possible to be ''persuaded'' to become a homosexual, also thinking that you could be gay just by thinking about dicks. Chris isn't gay. He's just a moron.
As for the other shit that 2litrepop did it all seems rather irrelevant and speculative. [[User:CrassCrab|CrassCrab]] 22:28, 16 July 2010 (UTC)
::That's true. Maybe the section's title should be changed to something like: "Evidence that Chris looks like a homo"--[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 22:40, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

ok - forget this site, you are clearly more interested in making an EncyclopediaDramatica clone, rather than accurately and objectively recording things. My speculation in the alcohol article was useless, but it was only to offset the obvious bias that was written in that article. Having one beer an hour before driving is not DUI. The amount of alcohol consumption Chris exhibits is nowhere near abuse potential. I should realize me editing the homosexuality page here would be like editing one on ED. I didn't realize this site was a joke.
--2litrepop

Alcohol

2010-07-16T22:30:09Z

Jerkop: Undo revision 105064 by 2litrepop (Talk)

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[Image:Sonichurosey.png|thumb|Ever since getting married to [[Rosechu]], [[Sonichu]] finds that Reeb helps dull the pain.]]

Like [[sex toys|shoving things]] up his ass, '''alcohol''' was something that [[Chris]] used to preach against until he tried it and discovered he loved the pleasant effect.

==Background==
[[Image:Z100_0533.jpg|thumb|Finally Loosened up and flew to Long Island June 12, 2009. Keep It Responsible; ONLY One in a day, or 7 or less in all in a week. ''(Quote from [[CWCipedia]])'']]
He considered alcohol a "slow-acting poison" in his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]] video. Alcohol is also mentioned in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], where in line 309, he mentions that he would not go to a singles bar because of it (and cigarettes). When asked about it in [[Mumble 2|Mumble Chat 2]], he stated that it "causes [[Chris and health|liver dysfunction]] and likely [[Anger|bar fights]] and [[6 June 2010|automobile accidents]]".

==Discovery==

Despite this, a [[Chris's Big Night Out|video]] of Chris drinking a [[Long Island Iced Tea]] was uploaded to [[YouTube]] on 12 [[June 2009]] perhaps showing us Chris will be willing to throw all his principles out the window when chances of being around a female arise. Following the events of 4 [[June 2010]], Chris is guilty of [[6 June 2010|drunk-driving.]]

==Hypocrisy==
The citizens of CWCville themselves, however, are forced to consume only [[CWC Cola]], a cola made with Chris's [[semen|secret ingredient]].

==Chandler family and alcohol==

It is interesting to note that [[Cole Smithey]] mentions that [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] and [[Barbara Chandler]] [[:Image:Cole_07-07-24-1.PNG|met at a bar and acted like a couple of drunken losers]].

The Chandler family line has an (unsurprising) history with alcohol. Chris's maternal great-grandfather, Robert Pettis Wynn, "drank heavily and had a [[sweetheart|girlfriend]] during the time he was married. Family stories say [[Bob|he failed to provide even the most basic support for his wife and children]] ...there are others who say he was a moonshiner."<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d118.html</ref>

==In the comic==
[[Image:RealReeb.jpg|thumb|Reeb is the official drink of [[Kick the Autistic]].]]
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|left|A worker at 4-Cent_Garbage downing a relaxing can of Reeb.]]

In ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' Chris refers to beer in all instances as "Reeb".

At first glance this seems odd until you realize Chris still thinks Sonichu is targeted towards children, and so, he feels he must censor any mention of alcohol in the comic. This is a common theme in [[English]]-translated [[anime]] shows such as ''[[Dragon Ball Z]]'' and ''[[Pokémon]]''.

Possessing or drinking alcohol was also one of the worst crimes to commit in [[CWCville]], and could have led to a $1500 fine or 10 years in prison<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> (the fact that Chris thinks that 10 years in prison and a $1500 fine are interchangeable is indicative of his broader attitude towards [[money]]). It is also interesting to note that this punishment is much more lenient than the CWCville penalty for [[homosexuality]].<ref>[[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|Mailbag 31]]</ref> And you thought Chris was intolerant.

In his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video he announced that the prohibition had been repealed. Hopefully this will curb the bootlegging mafioso who held the city in a grip of pleasant distraction from the horrors of being ruled by Christian Weston Chandler.

"Reeb" is the drink of choice for the drunkards at [[4-cent_garbage.com]].
{{clear}}

==Substance Abuse Issues==

It is speculated that Chris's introduction to alcohol held some consequence in his life. As evidenced by the [[Chris's Big Night Out]] Videos Chris's introduction to alcohol was a mostly positive experience for him. His introduction to the drugs effects was in conjunction with (as far as our knowledge goes) with his first night enjoying an adult experience Chris was not accustomed to. Alcohol was mentioned briefly in a video shortly after, titled [[I'm Sorry, Dude]]. In this video, Chris makes an offer to treat Logan to drinks; as opposed to his past offers of "coffee or soda" to those whom he wanted to get to know. Alcohol was briefly revisited again on camera in [[Chris's Big Night Out II]], where Chris was seen drinking. Chris's first recorded video where he appeared visibly intoxicated in [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls]]. Alcohol began a slow and steady progression into Chris's life; this was made obvious by the numerous references to drinks in the recent e-mails that have surfaced. In [[6 June 2010]], Chris revealed that he drives and attempts vehicular assault after drinking.

Alcohol may be contributing to the declining health of Christian. Since his decision to leave the internet and went about seeking real life interaction with other people, Chris has revealed to us that he spends most of his day sitting in bars and playing Nintendo DS. While once claiming to be a "Social Drinker", it is becoming quite obvious that Christian is anything but. Christian's childlike perception of the world is most likely deafening his awareness to the substance's advancement of relevancy in his life. At this point, Christian is most likely turning to alcohol for escapism. "I went over to a bar, and I had a Bud. A bottle of Bud. And I p- and then I played some solitaire on my DS, while I- while I waited to the- uh, while I waited to the hour." It is obvious that with Chris's current loneliness and depression, his alcohol use will yield repercussions in his life.

==Sauces==
<references />

==See also==
*[[Bob Chandler]] and [[Barbara Chandler]]
*[[4-cent garbage.com]], where the workers often drink reeb
*[[Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008]], where the CWCville crime is mentioned
*[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]], where he gives [[Fail|"advice"]] on the subject

{{Chris and}}

[[Category: Social life]]
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

User talk:Jerkop

2010-07-16T22:28:25Z

Jerkop: /* bagget */

Alcohol

2010-07-16T21:13:04Z

Jerkop:

Homos

2010-07-16T20:56:36Z

Jerkop: Undo revision 105004 by 2litrepop (Talk) Wait, are you trying to defend Chris?

{{quote|Homo males are objectionable, VERY objectionable (I hate them!)
|Chris<ref>[[CWC Update 30 January 2009]]</ref>
}}
[[Image:Homobad.jpg|thumb|'''Chris is the epitome of straightness.''']]

The pejorative term by which [[Christian Weston Chandler]] refers to '''homosexual people''' almost exclusively.

From the very beginning of his internet fame in [[2007]], his extreme opposition to homosexuality and his neurotic, obsessive demand that everyone [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"STAY STRAIGHT"]] have been one of his most noted and exploited aspects.

==Fear of being a homo==
[[Image:0067-Christian&Barbie.jpg|thumb|Chris tried to stay straight from an early age, by posing with Barbie. Note the kid on the left staring at Chris.]]

{{quote|"Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."|Chris <ref>E-mail to Megan, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*:; Date: Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm</ref>}}

[[Image:What_Chris_thinks_he_looks_like.png|thumb|Chris shows his [[Rainbow|true colors]].]]
[[Image:WantMan.jpg|thumb|right|Contrary to his claims of being straight, Chris craves cock.]]
[[Image:CWC new novel.png|thumb|A glimpse into the future?]]
Chris's homophobia is just that: he is literally afraid of homosexuality and of anything that could conceivably cause a straight person to be "leered off the straight path." His terror is such that he can barely bring himself to even utter the word "gay" or any other term concerning gay people, except of course for "homo." He has said that he cannot even look at a picture of a [[pickle|penis]] without being "freaked out"<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref> and he has cited [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|several techniques]] he believes are necessary to maintain his sexual attraction to women.<ref>[[Mailbag 3#Hypnotize away the gay|Mailbag 3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 3#Sexy posters|Mailbag 3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 4#Dissolving homoerotic thoughts in stomach acid|Mailbag 4]]</ref> Chris is also convinced that chances of homosexuality are raised as a direct result of not engaging in heterosexual intercourse before maturation,<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Dating_Education</ref> his retarded [[Dating Education]] classes naturally being the reasonable solution to preventing people from becoming homos. He continues to attempt to wildly assert his straightness (and fail at it), using stupid shit such as the [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail]] to objects as strange and totemic as his [[Optimus Prime]] toy. His attitude could be explained by one of four possibilities:

# Chris is a heterosexual idiot, so he thinks the slightest thing could turn him gay unless he maintains constant vigilance.
# Chris is a repressed homosexual, so he ''knows'' the slightest thing could turn him gay, because he can barely resist the temptation.
# Chris is bisexual, yet his underdeveloped mind fails to grasp the fact that there's actually such a thing as male bisexuality, so he thinks that people really ''can'' choose their sexual preference, and that giving in to his feelings towards other males will automatically turn him gay.
# Chris is asexual and has no primal instincts attracting him to girls, so he must consciously go out of his way to stay straight and avoid becoming a homo.
# Chris is autistic, and was raised by very old people. This combination caused him to learn about sex at a delayed rate, and causes him to interpret sexuality in peculiar ways. Hating homos helps Chis organize his confusing sexual knowledge, and adheres to his parental/religion based morals.

We don't yet have enough information to determine which of these is true, and we won't until he kisses a man on the lips (currently scheduled for [[2010]]). Of course we have to consider (because Chris won't) the small point that anyone, gay or straight, man or [[China|woman]], white or [[Niggo|black]], would most likely rather clean his or her genitals with sandpaper than touch Chris.

==Hatred of homos==
Chris's animosity towards gay people seems to result primarily from his fear of them and their supposed ability/desire to make him gay (this, despite the fact that women are likely jealous of the fact that men don't have to worry about Chris being attracted to them). He has often characterized the [[trolls]] as homos, which is either a basic ''ad hominem'' attack or a sincere belief that anyone who draws penises on [[Rosechu]] must be gay.

Notably, in [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC chat]] from 02 January 2009, Chris made this statement:
{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"|Chris, 02 January 2009, 11:59}}

He added that gay men should be incarcerated in co-ed prisons with other female offenders and be provided with access to prostitutes, arguing that they would come out "reprogrammed" into healthy, law-abiding heterosexuals.

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|February 18 2009]], Chris issued a retraction of his previous homophobic remarks and declared that he respects "the gay people" like he respects his [[gal pals]] and his [[sweethearts]]. However, this was mostly done at the insistence of [[Julie]]; by [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|March 10]] Chris was reciting verses from the Bible to justify his position against homos.

On 14 June 2009, he created a video called [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], which in the Chris-chan tradition of ruining everything you ever loved is a homophobic version of Uncle Ruckus's song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from the pilot episode of ''The Boondocks.''

Later on in the day, he published an apology for the video called "[[I'm Sorry, Dude]]", and insisted that he likes gays who "ac—...accomplish other things, like Stephen Fry who was a homosexual, but y'know he did a good job being a narrator on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''." This quote, of course, displays Chris's ignorance, as Stephen Fry is also a famous actor, comedian, writer, narrator (on things other than LBP), and author of some extremely witty and charming blogs that have a large Internet following, as well as being an advocate for gay rights. This apology was only posted for the sake of his [[gal pal]] Kim's boyfriend, whose gay brother apparently lost both his arms in Iraq.

Curiously, Chris goes out of his way to state that the children of Sonichu and Rosechu are watched over by [[Heather Iglesias]], whom he characterizes as "a pretty, trustworthy, good natured Spanish Lesbian." He further mentions that Heather keeps her sexuality a secret from the kids at the request of Sonichu himself. It is unknown why Chris mentions this, given that he has vacillated wildly in the past in his feelings on lesbianism, sometimes [[Mumble 1|coming out in support]] and other times [[CWC "Boyfriend"|condemning it]], or why the character is both Hispanic and a lesbian.

Chris occasionally tries to say he respects homosexuals for who they are. However, he repeatedly betrays his intolerance of different lifestyles, often within the same statement.

{{quote|"I personally respect the individual people as fellow human beings, and I am cool with associating with them as acquaintances and friends, but Please Do Not Wave Around what you do behind closed doors around me; NOBODY CARES TO KNOW; I PERSONALLY DO NOT CARE TO KNOW. Even within my imagination, I Do Not Care to even have the pictures Randomly Pop up in my head."|Chris <ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality</ref>}}

Because it's OK for him to wave around his degenerate sexuality and showcase real life pictures of his disgusting activities, but god forbid a well-adjusted male adult mention they love other men.

On 8 July, Chris left a comment on a PSN News Post in reference to a Unity avatar:<ref>http://blog.us.playstation.com/2009/07/attention-fighting-fans-prove-youre-the-best-around/</ref>
{{quotebox|Hey, the Street Fighter Tourney is good news, but I have a concern about the person who left the message.

His Avitar…

If that icon is WHAT I THINK IT IS, I AM OFFENDED; please change your Avitar, dude.}}

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 26, 2009|July 26 2009]], Chris goes so far as to call gay a synonym for stupid.

In the mailbag section of the [[CWCipedia]], Chris describes at length his idea for his comic self to travel to the future, where scientists have successfully isolated the "homo gene" (an idea stolen from [[Wikipedia:Family Gay|this episode of]] ''[[Family Guy]]''). They have not, however, isolated the "straight gene", and are only able to when Chris donates his own blood (Chris has once remarked that [[Honor roll|homosexuality could be cured by injecting blood from straight men into homosexuals]], or by imprisoning gays in [[Rape|co-ed prisons]]). Chris intended to bring at least two syringes of the solution back, one for [[Reldnahc]], and the other for emergencies (likely to be used on either himself, [[Magi-Chan]], or [[Megagi]]). Thanks to Chris's crippling insecurity about his sexuality, when this storyline finally came to light in [[Sonichu 10]], Chris amended this plan to not only bring back a couple of syringes, but also enough of the "cure" to turn every gay person on Earth straight.

[[Jack Thaddeus]] purchased advertisement space on the [[CWCipedia]] to put up two ads on the site. One of them was an ad featuring Peter Griffin of ''Family Guy'', pointing out that he and his creator, Seth MacFarlane, were supportive of gay rights. In retaliation, Chris blew his stack, [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|stating]]:

{{quote|I understand you getting paid to run ads in that box on the Cwcipedia. I feel okay with Vivian's Audiobooks, BUT I feel OFFENDED with the Mexico Contest and Gay-Rights Ads. The Pickle on the Mexico ad reminds me of a terrible time in my past with Pickle-Suited TROLLS, and '''I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLES and FOR STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUALITY.'''

Please Remove, or Change the Images of, THE TWO ADS.

And in the future, if you plan on adding more advertisements, INCLUDING the associated images, Please run them by me in a message for my personal Approval BEFORE you start running the ads.

Thank you.|Chris, <ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User_talk:WikiSysop#The_New_Ad-Links WikiSysop User Talk: The New Ad-Links ]</ref>}}

In a [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|phone call]] with [[Jack Thaddeus]], Chris stated that he assumed that a friend of Jack's was gay when he heard that he had AIDS.

On Christmas Day, 2009, the Sysop at the CWCipedia added a Twitter onto the webpage. Two days later, Chris saw this and flew into a tizzy, wanting the Twitter off as he didn't want any "homo trolls" talking behind his back.

Around New Year 2010, Chris replaced Jack Thaddeus's gay-friendly ads with ads for [[wikipedia:Love In Action|Love In Action]] (an "ex-gay" ministry), ProtectMarriage.com (a site promoting [[wikipedia:California Proposition 8 (2008)|Proposition 8]]), and a site that calls for a boycott on Pepsi due to their gay-friendliness. In another ad, he also suggested that ''[[wikipedia:Avatar (2009 film)|Avatar]]'' was a ''totally'' straight film. To sum it up: Ex-gay campaigns, Proposition 8 and ridiculous consumer boycotts — in one fell swoop, Chris managed to put in three big things that do ''not'' win himself any gay friends whatsoever and prove all of his previous "respect" for gays is nothing but idle words.

On January 5th, Chris responded a [[mailbag]] letter addressing the homosexual subject. In the answer, Chris stated that [[Magi-Chan]] keeps a constant psychic-surveillance to ensure that there are no homos in CWCville. When evidence of homosexuality was found in a couple, the people involved would be arrested and fined heavily. Chris also apparently fails to notice that by having Magi-chan constantly reading people's mind would infringe the most important and basic of human rights: the right of freedom of thinking. He also fails to realize that having Magi-chan scan CWCville for gay thoughts would end in Chris getting arrested due to the fact that he says he has random images of penises appear in his head.

Then, on January 7th, when answering the question of how he began hating the gay population, we got this interesting insight...

{{quote|I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, 2003 just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE!|[[Common Questions#Answered 07 January 2010|Chris, before finally stating (for the umpteenth time) that Sonichu is straight]]}}

Not only is this ironic, considering his current views on lesbianism, but it adds another interesting aspect to his hatred: Chris's frustration with homos is influenced by him being childish and whiny about not getting his way, just because ''one'' woman turned him down. We wouldn't expect anything different from him.

On 30 [[January 2010]], Chris voiced his opinion about the ban of homosexuals in the American Armed Forces. He is for the lifting of the ban so that "[[Mailbag 49#Chris loves his country|the homos can go die in explosions]]".
{{clear}}

==Evidence that Chris is a homo==

[[Image:564Homos.jpg|thumb|left|At least Chris doesn't [[fail]] at cataloging pictures. [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality No, it's not a shoop].]]
[[Image:CWCMonica.jpg|thumb|Oh lawd, is dat some lipstick on Chris?]]
[[Image:Bionic2.jpg|thumb|Chris projects his repressed homosexuality onto [[Bionic|one of his own abominations]].]]

{{quote|First off, should such images [of men's asses] enter your mind at random, just stop yourself. I have had this problem too. I would take all such images when they enter my mind and just delete them; I imagine, in my mind, rolling them all into a ball, shrinking it down, and tossing them into a garbage can that links to my Stomach through a direct bodily vein. I imagine the feeling of it falling through the vein and making its splash landing into the stomach acid and dissolving; gone forever.|Chris admitting he's had homoerotic fantasies, [[Mailbag 4]]}}

[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|Fun fact: [[rainbow]] colors are the internationally recognized colors for the gay pride movement.]]
[[Image:Sonichuballs.jpg|thumb|For someone who claims to be straight, Chris sure does love talking about BALLS. Also, balls are touching.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|That's one [[pickle|phallic]] [[Lego]] tower you're building there, Chris.]]
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]

[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|Ironically, the harder Chris tries to convince people he's straight, the more gay he appears.]] He has absolutely no awareness that an uptight, milquetoast, colorfully-dressed, squeaky-voiced man saying "I am straight! I have a subscription to ''Playboy''!" every five minutes looks like he has something he's trying to hide. Furthermore, the more we learn about Chris, the more gay he really appears to be.

* Christian has stated that if he were unable to stay straight he would undergo sex reassignment surgery; he would rather be female than gay. It should be noted that straight men never, ever, put this much thought into this hypothetical dilemma.

* He collects [[My Little Pony]] figures well into early adulthood.

* For a straight man, he sure does [[Semen#Transcript|consume a lot of semen]]. Likewise, the idea of [[Kacey Phone Call|licking his own ejaculate]] off one of his gal-pals sexually arouses him.

* Like many gay men, most of his [[gal-pal|"friends"]] were female and he never slept with any of them.

* In a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN Chat with Julie]], Chris admitted that he randomly has images of penises (his own and others he's seen in porn) pop into his head. He also claims to hear voices in his head that say "Christian is gay." Unless Chris is having ''very specific'' auditory hallucinations, it's likely he has homoerotic daydreams and freaks out about it. In the same chat he sounded ''delighted'' describing the first time he saw semen in a porno movie as a teenager.

* He owns, or at least has owned, anal beads and a vibrator, and he is on record as having experimented with putting both toys in his anus. In a chat during the [[Vanessa Saga]] on 16 [[April 2009]], he claimed that he no longer shoved things up his ass, except for "a narrow jet of water from my adjustable shower-head on a hose."<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 3]]</ref> Although it is quite possible to stick things up your butt and still be straight, people who are terrified of being turned gay generally do not do this.

*Chris said that he would put something up his ass for [[Ivy]] "in a heartbeat", including a large fake dick, and would let her fuck him with a strap-on.<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 7]]</ref>

*Chris said that he might let a gay guy fuck him if Ivy wanted that.<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 9]]</ref>

* Christian argues that the vibrator and anal beads were sent to him as a gift with an order of straight pornography; he did not ask for them or pay for them. However, according to [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|the receipts]] that were uncovered by trolls, Chris specifically asked for the anal beads as the gift.

* Chris gets upset that people know he has the vibrator and anal beads, and he gets upset that people think he's gay because he kept the vibrator and anal beads... but he never gets upset that the store sent him the vibrator and anal beads in the first place. You would think that if a troll sent him a dildo he'd be throwing a fit about it on [[YouTube]], but no.

* Chris kept the vibrator around for months.

* In the [[Chris Sex Logs]], Chris shows off a dildo to [[PandaHalo]]. He immediately suggests the phallic sex toy is something that [[Sex_Logs#This_is_my_dildo|goes up your butt]], and then immediately denies it's been up his butt. He also says having a dildo in your butt "will feel good."

* On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009|February 05 2009]] Chris posted two videos stating that he was coming out of the closet as a gay man. He later issued a retraction which was far less persuasive.

* When negotiating for the safe return of his PSN account from [[Max]], Chris was given the choice of burning his [[medallion]] or shoving it up his ass. Chris immediately chose to shove it up his ass.

* Chris thought a straight woman would be turned on by a [[nudes|closeup picture of his anus]].

* He wears a pink [[Belt Buckle of Fail|belt buckle]].

* He owns a set of [[Anime Wings]] which are basically hair clips. And hair clips are for women.

* His best man at [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|his wedding]] is [[Sarah Hammer]] in drag.

*He sang "I Love the Nightlife" on his [[Chris's Big Night Out|visit to a local bar/restaurant]], which is popular at gay clubs and drag revues.

* [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|''Christian and the Hedgehog Boys'']] features two covers of the Backstreet Boys, one cover of a [[Britney Spears]] song and one cover of a Ricky Martin song. This music was popular among 13 year old girls when it was new and is popular among the gay community today.

* [[muscle bra|He wears a bra.]] In fairness, he uses it to [[Fridays After Five|try to attract women.]]

* He implores men to wear [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|muscle bras]] because looking at shirtless men makes Chris uncomfortable,<ref>[[Mailbag 55#On braziers|Mailbag 55]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 55#Draconian_fun.21|Mailbag 55]]</ref> possibly arousing latent homosexual urges.

* He saved a [[No More Jokes|homoerotic image]] to his computer, and then made a series of movies about it.

* When you look up "'''Homosexuality'''" in Chris's [[CWCipedia|own web encyclopedia]], you ''literally'' see his own portrait (as shown on the screencap at the top of this section).

* In addition, the article for Homosexuality was created August 8th, 2009. The article for [[Rosechu|Rosechu]], a major character in his comics, wouldn't be created until 6 months later.

* In the [[PS3 History Level|PS3 History Level]] video, he showed that he actually owns a copy of ''Sex and the City: The Movie'' (which has a huge gay following) when he showcased his then current collection of [[PS3]] games and movies.

* While narrating the [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] Chris called PandaHalo his "partner," a term sometimes used by gays and lesbians to refer to the person they're dating.

* In his response to a letter in [[Mailbag 4]] about "impure" homoerotic thoughts, Chris confesses that he "[has] had this problem too," and has to resort to deleting them through a curious process that involves tossing them into a garbage bin inside him, lest the gay gene take its toll.

* Chris reacts to Alec Benson Leary's [[Asperchu]] comics by giving the all the characters a free makeover.

* In [[Sonichu 10]], Chris donates some of his "straight blood" to doctors in the future so that they could make a vaccine against homosexuality. Vaccines are made from people who have the virus being fought.

{{clear}}

==Defenses against becoming homo==
[[Image:CWCIsSTRAIGHT.jpg|thumb|According to Chris, heterosexuals defend their sexuality by taping index cards indicating their straightness to their shoes (while stomping on [[vibrator]]s). Srsly.]]

It's hard work for a warrior of true love and honesty to stay straight. Luckily, Chris has a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] which he stares at everyday to stave off his temptations of homosexuality.

Chris also subscribes to ''Playboy'' to help keep himself straight. You can tell he's straight because when he's explaining what he finds attractive in women it only takes five seconds for him to get around to boobies and [[China|vaginas]].

When homosexual (or potentially homosexual) [[trolls|fans]] sent Chris questions on the [[CWCipedia]] asking for tips to STAY STRAIGHT, Chris tends to offer what essentially amounts to self-brainwashing. Some of his ideas include thinking of naked women and how awesome they are, and imagining being struck by painful lightning whenever a homosexual thought occurs (amazingly, the latter appears to be some bizarre version of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Covert_sensitization covert sensitization] with an extremely severe and disproportionate punishment).<ref>[[Mailbag 3#Hypnotize away the gay|Mailbag 3]]</ref> He also clarifies that one need not buy their own poster of fail; any poster featuring attractive women (preferably in bikinis and looking sexy) will do the trick.

To prevent future homos, he also encourages women to not drink, smoke, or be physically abused while pregnant because he believes this could cause the baby to be born homosexual.<ref>[[Mailbag 5#Daniel Tammet/Punching your baby will make it gay|Mailbag 5]]</ref>

In [[Kill De Jack]], Chris reveals another one of his defenses against becoming a homo: he covers a section of his "[[CWC-ism|computer]]" (we can assume that he means "computer screen") with a piece of paper so that he can browse [[CWCipedia]] without looking at [[Jack Thaddeus]]'s ads featuring pictures of homosexual men.

It seems that the centerfold poster of [[The_Simpsons#Marge_Poster|Marge's Playboy magazine]] has become one of Chris's many defenses against becoming a homo. The fact that she's married has [[kacey|no bearing on Chris's desires.]]

{{quote|But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust in his eye has already committed adultery with her in his heart.|- Matthew 28, [[chris and religion|something Chris has probably never read nor wouldn't care to read]].}}

{{clear}}

==Chris on his alleged homosexuality==
[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]]]

*''"I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT! I WILL NOT BE VEERED INTO ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!!!"''<ref>[[Masturbating and squirtin']]</ref>

*''"I'M STRAIGHT! I'M STRAIGHT! '''YOU'RE THE HOMOS!''' EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref>

*''"I'm straight, don't doubt me!"'''<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref>

*''"Listen, as hard as you fucking can, [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|I CAME OUT OF MY]] AUTISTIC [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|CLOSET]] AS A STRAIGHT MAN, and NOTHING ELSE. SO YOU IMMATURE JERKS CAN JUST FUCK OFF."'''<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref>

*''"Yep, you heard me. I am...a [[gaybian|gaaaaaaaaay...bian]]."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the First Video]]</ref>

*''"Anyway the, uh--anyway so, to get to the point...fine. I'm guhh. I'm gaaaay. I'm gaay. I said it...OK. Yep. So...did I really come out of the closet there? That just depends on y'all--how y'all understand it."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the Second Video]]</ref>

*''"And look at me. Do I look like-- [shakes head in disagreement] '''No more of those stupid acquisition messages!''' Get it through your fucking, individual, damn, dirty, SKULLS! '''I. Am. STRAIGHT!'''"''<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts]]</ref>
{{clear}}

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Homosexuality}}

* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Chris and religion]]
* [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
* [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
* [[Gay 4 Sonichu]]
* [[Gaybian]] (a "male lesbian", according to Chris)
* [[It's UGH!]]
* [[Rainbow]]
* [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]]
* [[Magi-Chan]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyO3pnkI3H4 CWC(Ian Brandon Anderson) finally admits it]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE9hdbiwA3k Chris-Chan is sick of the lies!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOpGtblij8Y Chris-Chan proves those slanderous trolls wrong]

{{Health problems}}
{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Homos]]

Alcohol

2010-07-16T20:51:58Z

Jerkop: Removing speculation.

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[Image:Sonichurosey.png|thumb|Ever since getting married to [[Rosechu]], [[Sonichu]] finds that Reeb helps dull the pain.]]

Like [[sex toys|shoving things]] up his ass, '''alcohol''' was something that [[Chris]] used to preach against until he tried it and discovered he loved the pleasant effect.

==Background==
[[Image:Z100_0533.jpg|thumb|Finally Loosened up and flew to Long Island June 12, 2009. Keep It Responsible; ONLY One in a day, or 7 or less in all in a week. ''(Quote from [[CWCipedia]])'']]
He considered alcohol a "slow-acting poison" in his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]] video. Alcohol is also mentioned in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], where in line 309, he mentions that he would not go to a singles bar because of it (and cigarettes). When asked about it in [[Mumble 2|Mumble Chat 2]], he stated that it "causes [[Chris and health|liver dysfunction]] and likely [[Anger|bar fights]] and [[6 June 2010|automobile accidents]]".

==Discovery==

Despite this, a [[Chris's Big Night Out|video]] of Chris drinking a [[Long Island Iced Tea]] was uploaded to [[YouTube]] on 12 [[June 2009]] perhaps showing us Chris will be willing to throw all his principles out the window when chances of being around a female arise. Following the events of 4 [[June 2010]], Chris is guilty of [[6 June 2010|drunk-driving.]]

==Hypocrisy==
The citizens of CWCville themselves, however, are forced to consume only [[CWC Cola]], a cola made with Chris's [[semen|secret ingredient]].

==Chandler family and alcohol==

It is interesting to note that [[Cole Smithey]] mentions that [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] and [[Barbara Chandler]] [[:Image:Cole_07-07-24-1.PNG|met at a bar and acted like a couple of drunken losers]].

The Chandler family line has an (unsurprising) history with alcohol. Chris's maternal great-grandfather, Robert Pettis Wynn, "drank heavily and had a [[sweetheart|girlfriend]] during the time he was married. Family stories say [[Bob|he failed to provide even the most basic support for his wife and children]] ...there are others who say he was a moonshiner."<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d118.html</ref>

==In the comic==
[[Image:RealReeb.jpg|thumb|Reeb is the official drink of [[Kick the Autistic]].]]
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|left|A worker at 4-Cent_Garbage downing a relaxing can of Reeb.]]

In ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' Chris refers to beer in all instances as "Reeb".

At first glance this seems odd until you realize Chris still thinks Sonichu is targeted towards children, and so, he feels he must censor any mention of alcohol in the comic. This is a common theme in [[English]]-translated [[anime]] shows such as ''[[Dragon Ball Z]]'' and ''[[Pokémon]]''.

Possessing or drinking alcohol was also one of the worst crimes to commit in [[CWCville]], and could have led to a $1500 fine or 10 years in prison<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> (the fact that Chris thinks that 10 years in prison and a $1500 fine are interchangeable is indicative of his broader attitude towards [[money]]). It is also interesting to note that this punishment is much more lenient than the CWCville penalty for [[homosexuality]].<ref>[[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|Mailbag 31]]</ref> And you thought Chris was intolerant.

In his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video he announced that the prohibition had been repealed. Hopefully this will curb the bootlegging mafioso who held the city in a grip of pleasant distraction from the horrors of being ruled by Christian Weston Chandler.

"Reeb" is the drink of choice for the drunkards at [[4-cent_garbage.com]].
{{clear}}

==Substance Abuse Issues==

It is speculated that Chris's introduction to alcohol held some consequence in his life. As evidenced by the [[Chris's Big Night Out]] Videos Chris's introduction to alcohol was a mostly positive experience for him. His introduction to the drugs effects was in conjunction with (as far as our knowledge goes) with his first night enjoying an adult experience Chris was not accustomed to. Alcohol was mentioned briefly in a video shortly after, titled [[I'm Sorry, Dude]]. In this video, Chris makes an offer to treat Logan to drinks; as opposed to his past offers of "coffee or soda" to those whom he wanted to get to know. Alcohol was briefly revisited again on camera in [[Chris's Big Night Out II]], where Chris was seen drinking. Alcohol has now been accepted by Chris as being socially acceptable; this is made obvious by the numerous references to drinks in the recent e-mails that have surfaced. In [[6 June 2010]], Chris revealed that he drives and attempts vehicular assault after drinking.

Alcohol may be contributing to the declining health of Christian. Since his decision to leave the internet and went about seeking real life interaction with other people, Chris has revealed to us that he has spent time sitting in a bar and playing Nintendo DS. Christian is most likely accepting alcohol into his life, because it has allowed him to appear more normal and convinced him that he is taking part in social situations and rituals. Some speculate that Christian is turning to alcohol for escapism. "I went over to a bar, and I had a Bud. A bottle of Bud. And I p- and then I played some solitaire on my DS, while I- while I waited to the- uh, while I waited to the hour." It is predicted that with Chris's current loneliness and depression, his alcohol use will yield repercussions in his life. His family history would suggest that it is likely for him to abuse alcohol; however his past distaste for drinking, and knowledge of his parent's drinking habits integrated with his brother Cole's judgement of such actions may prevent it. Chris has never spend a considerable amount of his tugboat on any sort of food, drink, clothing, or medicine, so it is difficult to speculate that he would spend enough cash to develop alcoholism. Doing so would most likely take him away from his video games.

==Sauces==
<references />

==See also==
*[[Bob Chandler]] and [[Barbara Chandler]]
*[[4-cent garbage.com]], where the workers often drink reeb
*[[Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008]], where the CWCville crime is mentioned
*[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]], where he gives [[Fail|"advice"]] on the subject

{{Chris and}}

[[Category: Social life]]
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Gun Comic

2010-07-16T02:28:11Z

Jerkop:

[[File:Gun Comic Artwork.jpg|thumb|200px|An alternate take at the story.]]
On 8 [[November 2009]], [[CChanSonichuCWC|Liquid Chris]] uploaded a video containing [[comic]] drawn by [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] (Solid Chris) which depicted Liquid as a knife-wielding villain who kidnapped [[Kacey]]. Solid comes to her rescue and shoots Liquid in both of his feet with a handgun (because Ian is a kind enough guy to cripple his enemy for life instead of giving him a quick, painless death). This could be considered a [[Indirect murder threats|threat]] to maim Liquid in real life, which is, of course, [[Chris and the Law|illegal]].

The comic, known as '''Sonichu Special 4''', seems to be an adaptation of Solid's [[Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler]] level in ''[[Little Big Planet]]'', lifting most of its dialogue from the earlier production wholesale, including Liquid's awkward shout of, "I will have her! ALIVE!".

The [[Kacey and Liquid Call|resulting event]] caused by this comic exposed a lot of Chris's self-righteousness.
__TOC__
{{Infobox/Liquid
| name = Conspiracy to ATTEMPT MURDER AGAIN from Ian Brandon Anderson (his Comic Pages)
| video = {{#ev:youtube|pKUXjkmXh3c}}
| Stardate = 08 November 2009
| Maker = [[Liquid Chris]]
| Subject Matter = {{Comics}} Comics
| previous = [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, August-November 2009#Sonichu's Copyright Proof and Thank You Kacey's Father|Sonichu's Copyright Proof and Thank You Kacey's Father]]
| next = [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V1gEjtmm9M CWC-Tok]
}}

==Plot==
[[Image:bad_chris.png|thumb|256px|Rampant [[Boyfriend-free girl|girlfriend-unfree boys]] related crimes these days... [[Virginia]] is not the exception.]]

The story begins as Chris is "rushing at the maximum speed limit of 65 mph" to retrieve his [[sweetheart]] Kacey from "[[CChanSonichuCWC|that lying copycat, Chris]]." Chris doesn't say whether Kacey is in any imminent danger at this point (especially as it takes him about an hour and a half to get to her), but he explains that Liquid Chris "could never truly treat her right," necessitating this rescue mission.

[[Son-Chu]] arrives at Liquid's hideout and Chris rushes in, demanding that the "damn, dirty troll" give up Chris's property. Liquid responds by brandishing a knife and attacking.

Chris dodges the blow, seizes his opponent in what appears to be a surfboard stretch, disarms him, and knocks him to the ground with a kick to the lower back. He then draws a handgun - the [[Megatron pistol|Megatron]] toy featured in some of his earlier videos - upon an unarmed and defenseless Liquid and shoots him in both shins. "You'll live," he declares callously, "but never impersonate or lie that greatly ever again!"

The scene then shifts to Kacey's home, where all is well. Her parents (one of whom resembles the character [[Wikipedia:Guile (Street Fighter)|Guile]] from the ''[[Wikipedia:Street Fighter|Street Fighter]]'' video games) shower Chris with admiration, and so do her siblings (one of whom resembles the character Candice from [[Wikipedia:Pokémon Diamond and Pearl|''Pokémon Diamond'' and ''Pearl'']], see a pattern here?), who add that "in comparison, that other guy was a geeky twerp." Chris and Kacey share a kiss and their adventure is over for now.

{{clear}}

==Marriage==
Liquid also used this video to announce that he and Kacey are getting married.

{{Quote|I am Getting Married to Kacey around 2 p.m. This Wednesday. I Love ya, Baby.|}}

Chris has since [[CWC_is_sad|tearfully responded]] to the loss of his [[China|true love]].

==Gallery==
<center><gallery perrow="5">
File:SchuComicSP4P1.jpg
File:SchuComicSP4P2.jpg
File:SchuComicSP4P3.jpg
File:SchuComicSP4P4.jpg
File:SchuComicSP4P5.jpg
</gallery></center>

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QlAOs3z9TFw Alternate music version for those in Germany]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sdxn7vR00Rg Audiobook edition]
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?3eotyjzlrzh Original files]

{{succession|label=[[Liquid Chris|CWCivil War!]]|prevlink=[[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, August-November 2009]]|nextlink=[[Sonichu Special 4|Current]]|}}
{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Comic]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]