CWCki - User contributions [en]

Lars Call

2010-11-07T07:39:58Z

Joson:

[[Image:Lars.jpg|thumb|Lars, with boat]]
{{quote|The fuck that shit be??|[[Lars]], questioning on what [[autism]] is}}
The '''Lars Call''' is a ninety-minute phone conversation where Chris discusses with [[Jackie]]'s ex-boyfriend [[Lars]] addictions, a parade he promised Jackie, what he would do for a woman, and boats. Chris gets comfortable with ebonics, and hilarity ensues.

==Summary==
* Jackie had an involuntary abortion thanks to Lars
* Lars getting rid of his boats, Chris gets rid of his [[Lego|Legos]]
* Lars didn't finish school because people played [[Kick the Autistic|Kick the Nigga]]
* Lars doesn't understand [[autism]], after Chris's explanation, he thought it was [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger's]] and Down Syndrome
* Chris whines about trolls, not getting a job, and being called a [[homo]]. Lars hears him
* Chris doesn't like when people say "[[gay]]" [[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC#Transcript|as in stupid]], Lars doesn't like when people say "nigga" out of context
* [[Sonichu]] (didn't see that coming), Chris incorporates IRL enemies. Lars tells him to continue the comic in order to conquer the trolls
* Lars says Jackie is upset because she isn't an inspiration for Chris to do the comic, and he sometimes doesn't do what he tells her he will.
* Chris tells Lars he's a [[virgin]], Lars says that explains his rage against the trolls.
* Chris rewrites the comic so he doesn't kill "[[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Nigga]]"
* Jackie better not burn that casserole.
* Chris promised a parade for Alec to Jackie, Chris denies it, Lars has the [[Jackie_E-mails_20|e-mail proving]] he did.
* Jackie initially broke up with Lars because he told her he'd lose the boats, and he didn't. Chris feels him. Chris is Lars's Nigga
* Chris is willing to give up [[the Moon]] and Mercury if he had it, for Jackie. He's really giving up video games, but he won't sell his "[[PS3|PS Triple]]"
* Lars spent $35,000 on six credit cards for boats. He won't let addiction rule his life anymore
* Chris swears on the grave on his [[Aunt Corina]] he will not spend anymore on his PS3 (at least it wasn't [[Patti]])
* Lars spent 9 months as a volunteer at a hospital enjoying the sight of [[Bob|old white men]] dying
* More bitching about trolls.
* Lars and Chris talk about their criminal records, Lars makes trespassing sound bad ass
* Chris apparently turns into a nigga himself as about halfway in and speaks in Ebonics (off and on) the remainder of the call
* Chris would [[Death threats|shoot]] [[Michael Snyder]] if he had the chance. Michael was just looking for a reason to ban Chris
* Lars gives Chris a scenario of someone breaking in. Chris says he's strong and would kick their ass (only if they hit first)
* Chris likes Black people on TV. Lars gets mildly offended upon hearing how Chris likes "Sanford & Son". They both hold up their fists in solidarity.
* The conversation goes back to Jackie, they wonder why Jackie is mad at Chris.
* Chris claims that he will make things right
* Lars tells Chris that his dick is four inches of straight goodness
* Lars burned his boats because he wants Jackie back and suggested that Chris burn his PS3 to get Jackie back.
* Lars thinks he has the upper hand over Chris in the competition over Jackie. He was known as "Ram-rod" in High School
* Chris talks about his [[Cherokee]] heritage. He's not a "casino nigga" He beats the stereotype that Native Americans have jobs.
* Lars respects Chris trying to win Jackie back, while Lars is "[[Hanky-panky|ramrodding]]" her
* Chris talks about destroying his first PS3, Lars questions why he got a second one. Chris says he needs it as a computer. Lars asks why he didn't get a computer instead
* Lars tells Chris to improve himself whether Jackie stays with him or not.
* Jackie can't come to the phone, she's taking a massive shit courtesy of Taco Bell
* Chris whines that making changes is [[Autism|too hard]].
* Lars says Chris is afraid of women, Chris denies it
* Chris didn't have Taco Bell, he had a fish fillet for dinner.
* Lars lost his virginity at 10, he was scared.
* Lars tells Chris if he loses the PSTriple, his ass will be kicked out on the street and Jackie will be at Chris' doorstep the following day
* Lars concludes with the fist of solidarity, He will bang Jackie when she gets out of the bathroom.
* Chris promises [[Honest]]y to Lars, He wants Jackie '''AND''' video games
* Chris likes orange soda
* Lars didn't know what [[Wikipedia:Kenan & Kel|''Kenan & Kel'']] or Nickelodeon was, he goes to fuck Jackie.
* They say Goodnight

==Transcript==

Jackie: [In shrill, forced enthusiasm] Oh hi Chris, it's Jackie! How are you?

Chris: ... Oh ... Jackie ... Hi.

Jackie: Well I got your email!-

Chris: Well- ...... Yeah. Oh uhhh. Yep. What's a ... What's ... a ... (sounds of frantic typing) what's .. a what's ... uh your response there?

Jackie: Um, sorry I missed your- missed you last night, I just didn't know if you'd be around! Listen, I'm going to turn you over to Lars right now, and I'll be listening. So you-

Chris: Oh.

Jackie: -two boys play nice, ok?

Chris: Um, ok.

Jackie: Lars!

Lars: YO! BITCH WHERE MAH DINNER AT?!

Chris: ... hmm, Hello?

Lars: Yo!, yo-yo-yo. Who dis at?

Chris: ....

Lars: Yo dawg?

Chris: ...

Lars:[Clearly a white man] Yo who did-did? Yo this be Lars and shit, who dis?

Chris: Ugh, this is Christian.

Lars; Yo! yo, Christian C. How y'all doin' dawg?

Chris: Um, I'm-fu- I'm fairing out. How are you?

Lars: Doin' alright nigga. Shit. Yo I'll be honest with y'all dawg. I ain't wanna do this call and shit at first, y'know? You diggin' and shit? Bet y'all prolly felt the same way, and shit.

Chris: ...

Lars: But then my-m, my girl Jackie, she be all like: ''Bitch, you best be doin' this call! Lest I'll be all breakin' up you with y'all and shit.'' So I be like doin' the call and shit.

Chris: ...

Lars: Yo dawg-

Chris: ... Ye-

Lars: -what you wanna talk about?

Chris: Hmm, well, uh... yeah for uh... well, for one thing, well, I know what you put- what you did do to Jackie a while back, you spike- you spiked her coffee and killed the unborn child.

Lars: Yo yo yo yo yo, dog, yo dog. That my bad and shit, yeah. I'll own up to that shit, sure, shiiit. That's in the past and shit, dog. I own to that shit, and that's in the past. And I own up to that shit. Yeah.

Chris: Okay- okay, but how did you own up to that?

Lars: Shit, dog, what you talkin' 'bout? I ain't do that shit no more. I made that shit up. Yo dog, what you talkin' 'bout? Shit be long gone, water over the bridge and shit.

Chris: Well, the fact remains that she was pregnant with your child, then she lost it.

Lars: Yeah, yeah, all got- I ain't ready to be no baby daddy and shit. Shit, yo, nigga get scared and shit, fuck. Y'all know what that be like and shit. Y'all ain't be no a-dult and shit, you know? Ain't ready to take on no a-dult responsiblities. Fuck. I done pull a lot of bashin' (?) and shit, I tell ya what.

Chris: Yeah

Lars: I done regret it and shit. You know? Shit happens. Shit be in the past, though and shit. I'm a new nigga. You dig, you feel me?

Chris: Yeah, I hear- I hear you.

Lars: Yo, so I be burn no baby no baby fetus no more neither. I'm ready for baby now. I got a job and shit, I got rid of my stupid boats and shit too, damn.

Chris: Yeah, I heard you burned those boats.

Lars: Got rid of all of them boats. Not just my boats, neither. Got rid of boats, got rid of my expansion pass for boats, got rid of my paint kits for them boats, shit you know dog, I be goin' through my closet and shit, I got paint kit for boats I ain't even own, nigga. Man, sometimes a nigga just face his life and shit, when he ain't facin' it, he ain't realize what he got, 'til it's gone. Be like the song, and shit. You gots to get rid of all that shit, you feelin' me?

Chris: Yeah.

Lars: I got boats in the closet, boats in the yard, boats in the living room, boats in the lawn, boats in my driveway and shit. Boats on the roof and shit. Shit be takin' over my house. Like a bad habit and shit, y'all feelin' me?

Chris: Yeah.

Lars: Yo, yo, y'all got- y'all got any nasty habits and shit there Chris?

Chris: N-nasty habits?

Lars: Yeah, yeah, you know, any boats and shit? Model planes, and trains, and automobiles maybe? Anything that be weighing you down and shit?

Chris: Hmm, yeah-

Lars: We all got our demons and shit. You must got somethin', lay it on me, dog.

Chris: Oh... okay, well I did have a whole city made out of Legos that I tore- I des- pretty much tore it down, and-

Lars: Huh, y'all done got a city of Legos and shit? Man, I feel you, that's gangsta.

Chris: Yeah.

Lars: How much 'fetti y'all get for all them Legos, how much money you get?

Chris: Hmm, nah I didn't get very- I didn't give no- I didn't get much money from... I did- there just a whole bunch- a whole bunch of pieces of bricks and whatnot and people are already on their way and most children already have their own bunches of Legos, and they're like they don't need it any more to call up their house and all that.

Lars: Shiiit, I feel you. Take them Legos to the bank, get some Lego bills and shit. Man, I just took $30 worth of nickels to the bank this mornin'. Got myself some bills, I did. Jackson and a Hamilton and shit, goin' to Popeyes Chicken with that shit. Bet you feel that, right dog? Y'all ever been to Popeye's and shit?

Chris: Hmm, no I cannot say I have sampled Popeyes-

Lars: Dog, oh dog you missin' out, missin' out. Damn good chicken and shit.

Chris: Yeah, I'm sure it is, I have heard good things about Popeyes.

Lars: A'ight a'ight a'ight, you feel me, you feel me, and I feel you and shit. Damn, nigga. Yo, yo, I be digressin' and shit, we gettin' off topic. We be talkin' 'bout yours and mines nasty habits and shit, what else do you got, dog? Lay it on me.

Chris: Hmm...

Lars: I feel all righteous and shit, gettin' rid of all my boats, feel like a new nigga and shit. Feel like a whole new day be startin' for me. You ever have a feelin' like that, dog?

Chris: Yeah, I have felt that way before.

Lars: Tell me all about it, dog.

Chris: Well pretty much felt like- felt like a big time star and all that when I had a good number of friends back in high school. But then I had- then I graduated and had to leave Chesterfield County where I was going to high school and move back Ruckersville. And then it just, pretty much went downhill for me, and I didn't have too many friends

Lars: Shit, dog, I hear high school be fun and shit. Oh no, dropped out halfway through 7th grade and shit. That's a cross I had to bear and shit. Dayum.

Chris: Yeah.

Lars: Been tryin' to go to high school and shit, ain't no niggas in the school system be wantin' no nigga up in their classroom. They be playin' "Kick the Nigga" and shit. Shit ain't gangsta, they be straight bustas and shit. Fuckin' niggas. Y'all know 'bout getting tormented and shit, ain't you? Tormented for your differences and shit.

Chris: Yeah, I got pretty much tormented for my autism and considerable slow-mindedness, that has happened to me before.

Lars: Yo, yo, yo, dog, au-austiss- wait, the fuck that shit be? D- au...

Chris: Autism, it's a- uh, it's a slowness in the mind where, it just, uh, it basically inhibits social functions. Y'know, being able to socialize as well as normal people. You can look it up on Wikipedia.

Lars: Oh, y'all be a slow-in-the-mind and shit, then, huh? Like that Down Syndrome and shit. My cousin got that shit. Ain't got no neck and shit. Fuckin' shit, nigga can't fit no shirts.

Chris: Well, yeah, well, it's not uh- it is not Down Syssdrome, it's way different from Down Syndrome, just look it up on Wikipedia, and it's A-U-T-I-S-M.

Lars: Be more like that Aspergers and shit.

Chris: Um...

Lars: I ain't know anyone with that Aspergers, I hear that's some shit. They be all up in them trains and shit. Maybe I should get tested for that shit, I have my boats and shit. I probably grew out of it though, got rid my boats, though.

Chris: Yeah.

Lars: So you got them Aspergers and shit, all right dog- all right. I hear you, I feel you. I feel you, yo, we all got our- we all got our differences, we all gots our liabilities.

Chris: Yeah.

Lars: What else you got dog? Yo dog, you- you seem like a nice nigga and shit. Man, I ain't think this call gonna be pleaseant and shit, but so far we be doin' good. I ain't know why Jackie be comin' back to me and shit, when she got you. Says she ain't happy with you though. Why we gotta be talkin'? Why Jackie havin' us do this shit? She ain't explain nothing to me.

{{transcription}}

==External links==
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?mzqbcbh007abn88 Download]
* [http://goo.gl/DbVDg Non-mediafire mirror]

[[Category:Phone calls]]
{{stub}}

Talk:Lars Call

2010-11-07T03:17:54Z

Joson:

==Transcription==
I'll start from 10 minutes in case anyone is working on this and hasn't mentioned it. If you're having problems getting the .wav file to play then rename it with an .mp3 extension. --[[User:Digital|Digital]] 13:23, 6 November 2010 (PDT)
:The file should open with VLC, MPC or even Windows Media Player if you're having trouble. Winamp doesn't wanna play ball. Also we'll likely have to split up the transcript over a few pages, owing to the length of the audio. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 15:15, 6 November 2010 (PDT)
:I'll go ahead and transcript the first ten minutes then.--[[User:Joson|Joson]] 20:17, 6 November 2010 (PDT)
I thought a summary was needed, in case people didn't want to listen to the whole thing--[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 16:41, 6 November 2010 (PDT)

Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2

2010-02-10T22:33:04Z

Joson:

'''Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2''' is the second of the calls between Chris and Alec Benson Leary.

==Summary==
[[Image:DeadpoolYellowBoxes.jpg|thumb|This is what Chris actually believes.]]
Alec lets Chris ramble on about the ads again and the subject soon changes to subjects that make Chris feel uncomfortable in his Mailbags. One issue was with Rosechu's tail being pointed, to which Chris attempts to get Alec to believe he meant for the tail to be dull all along and becomes angry with Alec points out he is lying. The subject changes to how Chris feels Asperchu is a living breathing creature in another universe with thoughts and feelings and wouldn't want to be named Asperchu. Alec claims that Asperchu can't want to be named something else because Asperchu doesn't exist, to which Chris repeatedly calls Alec "naive" for not believing in a cartoon world similar to what's seen in the movie ''Who Framed Roger Rabbit''. They both agree to disagree, and then talk about the lack of updates in Sonichu. Chris blames his biological clock on the inability to upload new pages and explains how the creative process of his work requires a pain-staking 30 minutes of typing dialogue. Chris admits to using photoshop but says since his comics are hand-drawn and hand-colored that in his opinion (and his mother's apparently) Sonichu is the superior comic of the two. Alec points out that he draws his comics by hand, even if it's with a tablet and that his art shouldn't and doesn't have any less "personality" that Chris' shit work. Chris focuses on the adspace again, hinting that his only intention is to get Asperpedia ads removed. Alec brings up Simonchu, and Chris denies Simonla was ever inspired by Simonchu and how Evan wants Simonchu and Simonla written out of the comic. Chris replies with Alec's talk about Evan taking legal action with "I'll think about it".

==Video==

{{#ev:youtube|LGB99JTZJes}}

==Transcript==

 '''Chris''': Hello?

 '''Alec''': Hi, is this uh, is this Chris?

 '''Chris''': Yea, this is Christian Chandler, may I help you?

 '''Alec''': Hey Chris, this is Alec Benson Leary again, how are you?

 '''Chris''': Oh! I would have expected you to call at 9:30, uh but anyway...

 '''Alec''': Oh! I actually did try to call at 9:30, didn't get an answer so I thought I'd try again, you-your quite a difficult man to get a hold of Chris. 

 '''Chris''': Hmm Yeah, i can talk for a few minuets, so lets try not to [unintelligible] this conversation.

 '''Alec''': Not at all, I don't..I don't wanna drag anything out. Um, well first I'll ask you if you have anything specific that you want to bring up, cause I know that you had to go kinda abruptly last time, and I thought maybe that there was a point you didn't get to or anything.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': Okay... Wanna go ahead with that?

 '''Chris''': Umm... well first off, you know...you know I have um...I have gone to the CWCikipedia recently, its the Ads are still super-sized, but, they are more of a mockery towards me now, and I do not appreciate that.

 '''Alec''': Yeeeaaah, I'm Sorry about that, Mao is kinda, he got a little bit of a temper, you know, h-he-he is kinda mad about this whole... the mailbag situation, emails getting deleted and all that sort of thing. You know, I-I-I um, I saw in, uh, one of your mailbags, that you said that I delete, or uh, modify a lot of my emails. I don't know where you got that impression, actually, I don't do that. You know, I try to answer every email I get thoughtfully, and fully.

 '''Chris''': Well, thats probably easy for you....probably easier for you because, yours are not as.. mean and cruel and condensating as the ones I have been getting.

 '''Alec''': Have you been getting a lot of mean ones that have not been go into the mailbag? Cause, the ones I've see... a lot of them, well they do get critical at points, but I... I dunno, it seems like they been, they just kinda wanna, you know, have some questions answered.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, But I wish they wouldn't havta go so critical.

 '''Alec''': Like, uh, what do you mean, like uh, what are some of the things that you found just kinda crossed the line

 '''Chris''': Like-Like they talk about... Like they talk about copyright issue and crap...

 '''Alec''': [Trying to talk] Well that is..that is kinda of an important issue, I mean....

 '''Chris''': [Chris interrupts] BUT-but I have my own Copyright registration, that slip of paper I got from the Virginia Library of Congress...

 '''Alec''': Yeah, uh, I noticed one of the copyright related e-mails was um, someone asked if they could see, just some letter, or some evidence Sega or Nintendo gave you, uh, permission to go with Sonic and Pikachu, and that kinda stuff for Sonichu's origin story. Um, you know, if you provided those, that would silence those kind of e-mails right away.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': I mean, you do have copyright of Sonichu, but you would still need to show Nintendos permission to publish it, you know what I mean?

 '''Chris''': Hmm...

 '''Alec''': 'Cause it has Pikachu in the origin story.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': Yeah, yeah, I think that would be a good idea to show everyone in the mailbag, you know, that would shut up that line of questioning right away.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, but there's... also... the homosexuals, and uh, other topics, ugh, I can't remember them off the top of my head. Yeah, there's quite a few.

 '''Alec''': Like the accusations that Rosechu is a boy? I think, that was kind of a big thing-

 '''Chris''': Yeah-

 '''Alec''': People were going after-

 '''Chris''': But I, I mean, yeah, that's only before the rainbow strike, I mean, the point where that Raichu- female Raichu is within the rainbow, that would be after the rainbow strikes that Raichu. 

 '''Alec''': Hmm.

 '''Chris''': And with the power of the- with the power of the Chaotic Crystals.

 '''Alec''': Well you know-

 '''Chris''': I-it was with a point, it was as point to the end of that tail, in the two panels that preceded it, the tail was definately dull at the end.

 '''Alec''': Uhh, well, you know, the- as far as I know, the original comic does have a point tail, like a male has, and that's- that's still on your website, isn't it?

 '''Chris''': I-

 '''Alec''': You know, one thing I thought about was the gender differences in the pokemon, that didn't, Nintendo didn't do that until a while after you created it, Sonichu, right? So, I mean, I just don't get why you didn't go with that. That would've been a good explanation, but instead you kinda lied to your fans.

 '''Chris''': What do you mean, lied? I did not lie, I mean, you look at the two pictures before the rainbow hit, the tail is dull on the tip.

 '''Alec''': Oh, well, I see that in your picture that's on the front of the Cwckipedia, but on the original comic he had a pointy tail, or she, I mean.

 '''Chris''': The original- 

 '''Alec''': I've seen the original.

 '''Chris''': That's because- look, outside, that's just a line that is going outside of the square, whatever goes outside, does not necessarily count.

 '''Alec''': Uh, it doesn't look like it goes, like, outside the panel here, but... I mean, y'know... I don't really know. I know that you don't... you probably should have corrected that mistake, but you left it in. I mean, I'm just trying to- I mean, I just kinda wish that thing had gotten nipped in the bud. It kinda sucks, but this is like, a huge point of contention right now.

 '''Chris''': Yeah. Al-also, you know, another thing, I've actually found, I've actually found a forum of my loyal fans, and I have just read some posts about the ads that have been placed in the Cwckipedia, and they really don't like 'em either.

 '''Alec''': Hmm.

 '''Chris''': So, I'm not alone in that. 

 '''Alec''': Well, alright. Well... you know, uh... if they wanted to buy the ad-space that's, I'm sure they could too. I mean, again, y'know, the ads, I'm gonna keep trying to talk to Mao but it's really his area. Mao's kind of the boss of the ads, I'm just kind of the artistic genius. Mao does the business work. 

 '''Chris''': Yeah, that definately do not appreciate that- that drawing of me, in a diaper, and then just copying and pasting my signature to that. That's just wrong.

 '''Alec''': Well, you know, um, I noticed that even after our last talk you continued referring Asperchu as Mitch. I thought we had that cleared away. I thought you knew he was Asperchu, I mean Asperchu is my original creation.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, maybe so, but still-

 '''Alec''': And I think you still have the impression that Asperchu is a Sonichu, and you know that's not true, right? Asperchu is not a Sonichu.

 '''Chris''': Hmm, yeah, okay, but still think about this, y-y-y-you picked- you gave him the condition of Aspergers.

 '''Alec''': Yes, that's correct. Oh! That's another thing. I think you, I think you thought that I gave everyone that appeared on my comic Aspergers, but only Asperchu has it. Just Asperchu.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] Well-

 '''Alec''': Okay, you were gonna say something?

 '''Chris''': A-anyway, still, I think you could understand, since you have Aspergers and conservely, with my Autism, that we would pref- we don't really don't wanna be treated as sep- as treated as quote-unquote, "special" because of our mental conditions, we want to be treated as equal individuals.

 '''Alec''': [over Chris] Well that's certainly true, but how do you think I've been portraying Asperchu as being treated y'know different?

 '''Chris''': Try putting yourself in the shoes of your- of your Asperchu. If- if you, I mean, not only would you want to be treated as an individual equal, but-

 '''Alec''': That's how I portray him, he does everything normal people do.

 '''Chris''': But you would not want a name that empathizes the mental condition, you want a name that is more manly-

 '''Alec''': Well y'know, Chris, we don't choose our names. Our names are given to us. Asperchu never chose his name. I mean, think of it this way, the name Asperchu, if you think of that as a detriment, I don't, but if you interpret the comic that way, think of it as a personal, sort of, character flaw, if you will, that he has to work to overcome. All good characters have character flaws.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, I mean-

 '''Alec''': And, and, it's fiction. Sometimes characters don't always live the happiest lives in fiction, but that's part of what makes good fiction.

 '''Chris''': Yeah. Hmm, yeah, but still, think about it, what if your parents had named you Asper?

 '''Alec''': Uhh...

 '''Chris''': Just to foretell that you had Aspergers, that you would have Aspergers.

 '''Alec''': Well...

 '''Chris''': You would not want that [stammers] you were being treated- wanting to be treated as an equal in society, you would not to be called Asper because-

 '''Alec''': But Chris-

 '''Chris''': Because that emphasizes the mental condition you have.

 '''Alec''': Okay Chris, that's part of the, again, character flaw Asperchu has things weighing him down, he has curses and... y'know, not literal curses, but he has detriments to his life that weigh him down as a character, and he has to work to overcome those. That's part of what makes a good character. You wouldn't make a character that's just all powerful and perfect in every way and has no real problems ever, would you? That'd be kinda boring. Complex characters have problems that they overcome.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': And it takes, it takes time, too, to overcome a serious problem, I mean, you just renamed him Mitch, and that wouldn't do it, y'know you can't just go and snap your fingers and just wave the problem away and- 1. That's not realistic, and 2. That doesn't make for good fiction, I mean, all the drama you're building up, y'know, your readers really wouldn't really like that if you just kinda hand-waved it away, don't you think?

 '''Chris''': Alright, yeah, okay, but still-

 '''Alec''': Think about it like this: Superman is named Superman because he's super, right? And y'know, Superman is one of the most- [Alec is cut off]

 '''Chris''': I mean- as- as-as an individual, within his own world, outside of your control, Asperchu would not want that name, he would be in agreement with me, and would probably want to change his name to something like Mitch.

 '''Alec''': Ah, but the thing there is, Asperchu is not outside of my control because it's a comic, and I am the creator and, y'know, manager of his comic universe. So, I- as his creator I decide what Asperchu wants and what he doesn't want, and what his personality is like.

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': I mean, don't you think?

 '''Chris''': Fairly. I mean, have you ever watched the movie, "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"

 '''Alec''': Yes I have, it was a good movie.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, yeah, you got the whole toon world there, and within that, it coincides with the comic as well, and every individual comic, published or unpublished, drawn altogether. And within the world, would reside your Asperchu, so he would be with his individual thoughts that you gave him [indistinct] with his individual thoughts, he would hate having the name of Asperchu 'cause it emphasized his mental problem. 

 '''Alec''': Umm...

 '''Chris''': His special condition. And he's like, in the process of wanting to on from that, and become more acceptable in society, that he would not want a name that would make him feel...

 '''Alec''': Okay...

 '''Chris''': So he's still living it, even after he's fully recovered from it.

 '''Alec''': Okay, but Chris, um, "Who Framed Roger Rabbit", that was still a movie, and everything in it was predetermined by the movie writers and director, and there is no alternate cartoon world in reality, I mean, cartoon characters don't actually think and feel things. Okay, he's a question-

 '''Chris''': Well, you are obviously naive about that, because you don't fully understanding that, that universe actually existing.

 '''Alec''': So you do believe that, um, when an artist creates a cartoon character, that character becomes real? That what you're saying to me?

 '''Chris''': Within that universe, yes.

[Raucous laughter can be heard in the background]

 '''Alec''': But the universe is fake. I mean, the Asperchu universe exists on paper and in my computer. It's just, it's whatever I write it to be. Oh, here's a question for you. Okay, so if you think a character would want, you know, and appropriate name, a good name, not a name that calls them out on something, or sets them back, um... Sonichu is the name of a species, correct? I mean, there's Sonichus and Rosechus, those are a species, right?

 '''Chris''': Yeah, but, he was the first one, the first original Sonichu, and she was the original Rosechu-

 '''Alec''': So, wouldn't they want their own

 '''Chris''': [Indignant] And-and they each came up with their name, on their own, and they did not need a nickname to go with that.

 '''Alec''': Yeah, but Chris, if you're a human being would you be comfortable just being named, Human? Or Man? I mean, you wouldn't- would you be comfortable if the name Christian Weston Chandler didn't exist, and you were just called, Man, or Person or something?

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': I mean, y'know Homo Sapiens-

 '''Chris''': Yeah but I would [Chris and Alec talk over each other]

 '''Alec''': ...Homo Sapien.

 '''Chris''': Yes, but still-

 '''Alec''': Homo, homo.

 '''Chris''': I was not the first human being, and I actually had parents who gave me that name. Sonichu came in, he had to come up with his own name-

 '''Alec''': Well, Sonichu had you who gave him that name didn't he? I mean, within the comic, you Christian Weston Chandler are Sonichu's father right? I mean, why wouldn't, why wouldn't your cartoon self give him a name?

 '''Chris''':: Uh, that's the cartoon me, versus the real me.

 '''Alec''': Okay, but isn't the cartoon you... Okay, like you said cartoons are basically real, I mean, so shouldn't the cartoon version of you be just like you? Wouldn't you want to give your child a name? I mean you-

 '''Chris''': I did give him a name, he's the original Sonichu, so therefore, it's as such.

 '''Alec''': But all the other Sonichus also have nicknames, or secondary names, so, so the first Sonichu, I gotta think is feeling kinda left out. 

 '''Chris''': Well, he doesn't feel left out. He accepts that, and he's happy with it, just as Rosechu.

 '''Alec''':: Okay, well, I don't think Asperchu feels left out because, y'know, he's just my cartoon character. He's my property, y'know, he's my intellectual property, that's what he is. You can't have a person as property, so you know, he's my property, he's not a person, he doesn't feel things, he doesn't think.

 '''Chris''': Okay, well still, what if you could actually could see- what if you could actually could see the child with your girlfriend or wife? Then, would you feel that you own that child even after you have raised him from being a baby, to, let's say, late teenage years where that child would feel more like and individual and independent being?

 '''Alec''':: [clearly frustrated with Chris's nonsense] Chris, you do understand, that a child, a human being is substanially more that a comic character, right? They're not the same thing, they're not even close. Of course I would name a child, children are real, and children are not our property, I mean if I had a child, I would give it all the love and support it needed, but it is it's own person, he or she, I should say. Where as a comic character is just, it's whatever you draw on paper or in Photoshop. I mean, I draw Asperchu on paper, that's the only place he exists. And then I upload him onto my computer and that's where he exists, and he exists on the web. So I have a character, he grows, but he's never a person.

 '''Chris''': Hmm. Well anyway, this is confusing to think about. Okay- well- yeah...

 '''Alec''':: We can agree to disagree.

 '''Chris''': Okay, what if As- what if the shoe was on the other foot- what if Asperchu created you?

 '''Alec''':: Well then, I'd be a comic character, myself, and I wouldn't have any thoughts and feelings, so that's a moot point.

 '''Chris''': You think that comic character wouldn't have it's own thoughts and feelings?

 '''Alec''':: NO.

 '''Chris''': You are naive.

 '''Alec''':: Chris, you have told me that you think a comic character is fundmentally as much of a person as a real human being, that is the naive thought.

 '''Chris''': No, you are-

 '''Alec''':: I'm a writer, I'm like the god of the Asperchu world. I decide what goes on in Asperchu's world, I decide, who and what Asperchu is and what he thinks and feels, if anything, which he doesn't, because he's still just a character on paper, y'know, when I put the pen down, Asperchu stops being there. Nothing exists in Asperchu's world that I haven't drawn.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] Boy, you are-

 '''Alec''':: And it's naive to think that there's anything more.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs again]

 '''Alec''':: You know, I'm, uh- I think we should agree to disagree on this point.

 '''Chris''':Alright.

 '''Alec''': Um, because we have our own thoughts on that. Um, I kinda ask you about- I'm actually getting some letters about Sonichu, about why you're not updating daily, and I was kinda curious about that.

 '''Chris''': I- for your information, I am updating daily. I draw two pages- I draw and color my two pages a day. I can't help if I don't have access to my computer or if I can't get to it right away, besides which, my biological clock has been fickle on me and it's making me go- making fall asleep early.

 '''Alec''': Well, I understand-

 '''Chris''': And it's difficult to rearrange my schedule, and get back in- in a sync-syncronised routine like I would be.

 '''Alec''': Maybe you could get an alarm clock. You know, I- I'm just kinda curious, like, I know it takes, what, like an hour to do each page, about what you spend, I would kinda guess. Um, I'm just kinda confused why you'd spend an hour to draw a page, but not take that extra sixty seconds to upload it. I think consistency is important thing- 

 '''Chris''': But, wait, it could take- it takes more than sixty seconds to scan it in Photoshop, then upload it. It would probably take like half an hour for all that work.

 '''Alec''': I didn't know you did Photoshop work with your pages. What do you, what do you use photoshop for, if I may ask? I'm just kinda curious. I thought you just-

 '''Chris''': T-t-to change it from more hand-written text, to more legible typed text.

 '''Alec''': Y'know, If I remember right, I think kinda one of the criticisms you had about Asperchu was that it was not completely hand-drawn original. Because I do use Photoshop in part of my creative process, but it sounds like you do kind of the same thing. Which is, you know, that's fine. Digital, digital media is where our world is going, but I thought- see I thought you drew it all on paper and uploaded it.

 '''Chris''': I did draw it all on paper. The only part I edit in Photoshop is the text; what you reeead.

 '''Alec''': 'Kay, I thought so. Well, it just seems a little hypocritical, but you do use Photoshop in the creative process, but you critisized me for it. Don't you think?

 '''Chris''': No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the hand-drawing and you draw everything on your Photoshop with your computer mouse.

 '''Alec''': Well I don't-- here's what I do. I do sometimes draw the pages on paper, um, I'm kinda trying to shy away from that because, our society wastes so much paper, so I'm trying to be a little more socially responsible. But what I do, I use a tablet, and I draw on that, and that's basically the same thing as pen and paper, it's, uh, what I draw goes directly on the computer screen. So I don't use a mouse. 

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': Yeah, it's the same thing-

 '''Chris''': Okay, but still, it looks crappy compared to mine. Even my mother agrees.

 '''Alec''': Oh, hey, hey, hey, c'mon that's a little insulting Chris, what do you mean, "crappy"? I mean, my mother says my comic is the most beautiful comic she's ever seen too but, I kind of think that's because she's a supportive mother. You know, mothers are supposed to support their children in their endeavours. And I have, y'know, got 20,000 fans now that love it too. None of them are my mother. My mother doesn't actually use a computer, I just show her the print-outs.

[There is a brief silence]

 '''Alec''': Y'know I get complemented on my art all the time. 

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': I mean, it's okay to disagree. I just, I'm curious why you think it's crappy?

 '''Chris''': Because it's computer drawn. It's not originally hand-drawn.

 '''Alec''': I just told you, it is hand-drawn. It's hand-drawn on a tablet. What do you mean, it's not an original hand-drawn?

 '''Chris''': It don't have the old-fashioned original pencil or pen markings, that's what I have.

 '''Alec''': So, because I don't have smudge-marks on my paper, is that's what you mean? That was another reason I went with the tablet, because I got a lot of smudge-marks on my paper when I was doing math and I had to spend extra time erasing it. Y'know is-- okay, by comparison, could I say that our cars are not true original transportation because people should be using old-fashioned horses? You use Photoshop for lettering and effects. We're one in the same here, Chris.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs]

 '''Alec''': And-and again, I just don't see why, the exact method I use to draw determines the skill of my art. Weren't you um, I remember recently, didn't you put, like, a live picture of yourself in your comic for some Guitar Hero theme? I mean, you didn't draw that part in, did you?

 '''Chris''': I-I-It at least allows me, to put myself in my work. See, a bigger difference between drawing with a tablet or mouse versus hand-drawn is that you see more personality with the orig-- with the pen-marking, and color-- and marker coloring versus whats... whats digitally entered-

 '''Alec''': Well, if you feel that way. If you feel that way, I respect your opinion, but, I mean, y'know, 20,000 fans can't be wrong, and not a single one of them have ever said anything.

 '''Chris''': Okay well--okay well, l-let me give you a better example on that. Okay, say you got, uh, two letters, two exact same letters from a person, from the same person. One hand-written, and one computerized and printed, which one would you think would have more personality, or would appeal to you better?

 '''Alec''': I honestly don't remember the last time anyone wrote me a hand-written letter. I don't even remember the last time I wrote a hand-written letter, I type everything, every kind of- I mean, typing looks more professional.

 '''Chris''': Professional, yes, but-

 '''Alec''': I mean, hand-written wouldn't get you a job, or anything.

 '''Chris''': At least I have had all the practice of hand-writing, and that- there's more character, more personality put into it, in hand-writing versus what you would just see, everyday in a monosyncronic(?) sense.

 '''Alec''': Well, you know why you see it everyday, everywhere, Chris? You see it everywhere, because it works. Because that's what people prefer.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs]

 '''Alec''': I think we're getting kinda off-topic, I mean I just-- I kinda wanna go back to, um, I understand it can be difficult to get to your computer and upload things, you know in a timely fashion, sometimes, you're not at your computer, things like that, but, I mean, Sonichu's your franchise, a lot of fans I know are getting kind of, y'know, fed up that you don't have pages uploaded everyday. I mean, Sonichu is your, that's your franchise, right? I just, I dunno, I mean, I got a lot of stuff going on in my day too, but I make sure to get at least one or two pages uploaded everyday. Which has been more difficult since my school term started, 'cause I'm in full time school, and, y'know, I work still, I'm still working at the station but... that's just a recommendation, but... again, I know it's difficult, but I recommend that you try. That's all I'm saying.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, well, I am drawing- I have been drawing the pages, and like I said, I cannot help it if I can't upload on some days, but at least I do upload them in the bulk on when I can upload.

 '''Alec''': You know, for a while, for a couple months, you were uploading most everyday weren't you? I mean, has something, has something, has your schedule gotten busier recently or something?

Chris: I've been falling asleep earlier. And with that, it's hard- and with that it's harder for me to readjust my schedule.

 '''Alec''': You know Chris, if I fell asleep on my job, I'd probably lose my job. I mean, Sonichu is supposed to be your big franchise, right? I mean... if fell asleep while drawing Asperchu and I started missing days, I would buy myself and alarm clock. Or I would upload them earlier, before I knew I was gonna get tired, or whatever.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': It's just-

 '''Chris''': Anyway, anyway I haven't been able to get my schedule around and I just haven't been able to get it in sync yet.

 '''Alec''': What's uh... if I may ask, what's... has something been going on that's been throwing your schedule for a loop? I mean, you-you haven't made videos in the past couple of days but you know prior to that, you were making videos fairly frequently, mostly attacking me. 

 '''Chris''': Originally did-- originally when I did the videos it was not necessarily on a daily basis, that's not like, journal, a video is not like a journal to me.

 '''Alec''': Well but, you know, if you spend 5, 10, 15 minutes making a video, that's time you could be uploading a comic. But instead you make videos attacking me. 

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] Pl-plus, the battery power on my digital camera is fickle.

 '''Alec''': What does your digital camera have to do with uploading pages? I'm saying you shouldn't be using the camera, you shouldn't be making videos. You know why I haven't made any videos, Chris? It's cause I don't have time, I'm uploading pages that and-- that and I don't make death threats to people on the internet, that's not a... I mean, you know-- you know you really hurt my feelings when you started doing those Chris, because, like I said you started as my inspiration and a couple months later you became my troll.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs]

 '''Alec''': I know you have trolls, you know, it sucks.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': It really sucks to have people attacking you like that, but you became my troll.

 '''Chris''': Alright well... you know, how 'bout you just tell Mao that I... if he just... I'll leave y'all alone, let y'all do your thang... y'all take your ads off my website.

 '''Alec''': That's just not a... that's not a sound business move for me, Chris. Those ads are bringing in a lot of viewers

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] So, put 'em on another website.

 '''Alec''': Well, what if that website tells me that, y'know, they don't want them there, then should I move to another website, and then another, and then another... Mao's job is to bring in fans for me, that's what he's doing and he's doing it well, and that's why I keep him-

 '''Chris''': Well, Mao- Mao never asked me before he could- before he put anything up there or before he paid off Jack Thaddeus.

 '''Alec''': Well, he doesn't have to, that's the way ads work. You buy adspace that's publically available. Advertising is not under your control.

 '''Chris''': Ye-Yeh- But I was- but I was never there to witness that monetary transaction, I was never there for that quote-unquote "agreement".

 '''Alec''': You don't own the site, Chris.

 '''Chris''': ...what?

 '''Alec''': You don't own that site. Right? I mean, the money from the ads go to keep the site up, that's my understanding.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] Actually, you're wrong, you see, Mao ga-put- gave that to 2000 Euros directly to Jack Thaddeus actually put that 2000 Euros into the Cwcipedia funds, so therefore, Mao never saw his money in his money in the Cwcipedia funds, they just went straight to Jack.

 '''Alec''': Um, I'm not really sure. I've never spoken to Jack, I don't know anything about what he and Mao talked about, y'know I'd kinda like to help you out, honestly I would, but I'm still a little... I'm a little miffed that um... even after we had a pretty good talk last time, but you still kept going with this whole Mitch business. I mean, you took my character, and altered him. You say, you say that I didn't get permission to use Sonichu, but you didn't get permission to use Asperchu either.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, well...

 '''Alec''': Or Simonchu! I-I-I almost forgot to mention that, Evan wanted me to talk to you about that, about using Simonchu. Y'know, Simonchu was his creation and you used that without perimission. And he asked you several times, not- to get rid of Simonchu and Simonla, or whatever her female form is. But- 

 '''Chris''': Yeah, but actually, Simonla was never very inspired by Simonchu... I took an original Rosechu, I changed her to a ground color, gave her the complexion, added an armadillo shell, and then a few drills in appropriate faces- places.

 '''Alec''': So kind of how I took a Sonic, and make him yellow, and gave him a goatee and glasses, and a buddah belly, and thus was born Asperchu. And, it was- you thought it was a parody, but it just happened to be... that kinda what you're going with, for there? I mean, why didn't you just say that to Evan in the first place, 'cause he has been e-mailing you for a long time 

 '''Chris''': I-I told him- I responded- I told him that in response- in response to why those messages in the mailbag, but apparently, he had not read that.

 '''Alec''': Okay, uhm... let's see, I'm looking at the Simonla at your Cwcipedia here, um, you say that... I'll just read what it says here: About, on or before August 26, 2008, I received and e-mail from Evan George, uhh... submitting his Sonichu fan-art to me, then later submitted his idea for Simonchu, it did not strike as good at first but for a few months, I wanted to create a ground type, um... so from Simonchu, I created Simonla Rosechu. That's on the Simonla article for your Cwcipedia. I mean that's, smoking gun, Chris, that's proof, that you used Simonchu as a base.

 '''Chris''': [Groans]

 '''Alec''': I'm... y'know I'm not trying to attack you with this but I really think this is Evan's, that you should get rid of Simonchu and Simonla, write 'em out. 'Cause the facts are right there Chris.

 '''Chris''': Well, actually it was not like that, I typed it in because Evan was badgering me as such, and it just stuck in my head, and pretty much stuck... when I typed it in originally. 

 '''Alec''': Why would that just stick in your head, why would that happen? Why would it stick in your head, unless it's true?

 '''Chris''': [Trying to think of an excuse]I put it in there to make a mockery out of him!

 '''Alec''': Well, then you kind of... kind of lied about it to people, didn't you? I mean, 'cause everyone else thinks that's the honest truth

 '''Chris''': Well, I can stick- well I can change that in [indistinct].

 '''Alec''': Doesn't matter, you already established it. I mean, when it comes to, like, copyright, and that sort of thing, Chris, I mean, the one thing that matters more that anything else is documentation, and history. And all of your documentation shows that you used Simonchu as inspiration. You acknowledge lega liability here. Whether it was a joke or not, you wrote it like it was real. And Evan's been pester-

 '''Chris''': [Chris lets out a big sigh]

 '''Alec''': ...ing me to talk to you, 'cause apparently you're ignoring his e-mails... although you ignore my e-mails too. I mean, like I said, it was a pain just to get a hold of you. I mean, for a guy who has so much to say to me, you are hard to get a hold of.

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': I mean, you, you, I'm just I wanna let you know, you do need to comply with Evan's demands, 'cause he's talking about litigation, and that if he want to get a lawyer over this. He said that he'd, that he'd back off if you acknowledge, in the comic and write Simonchu and Simonla out, and y'know, say that they will be done and gone forever. He has the copyright for Simonchu. I mean, would you be willing to do that? Write 'em out? 

 '''Chris''': I'll con- I'll think about it.

 '''Alec''': Okay, well don't think too long. I mean, this is a serious issue.

 '''Chris''': [Sigh]

 '''Alec''': I'm just- I'm just trying to give you advice, Chris.

 '''Chris''': Yeah-

 '''Alec''': I don't wanna see litigation out of this.

 '''Chris''': Hmm... anyway I'm feeling tired right now.

 '''Alec''': Okay well, I'll let you go, um... you have a good night, Chris.

 '''Chris''': Alright, goodnight.

 '''Alec''': Goodnight.

{{Transcription}}

{{succession|label=[[Alec Benson Leary calls]]|prevlink=[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 1|Chris and Alec Call 1]]|nextlink=[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 3|Chris and Alec Call 3]]|}}

==External Links==

*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGB99JTZJes The Call on Youtube]

[[Category:Phone calls]]

Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2

2010-02-10T22:30:45Z

Joson:

'''Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2''' is the second of the calls between Chris and Alec Benson Leary.

==Summary==
[[Image:DeadpoolYellowBoxes.jpg|thumb|This is what Chris actually believes.]]
Alec lets Chris ramble on about the ads again and the subject soon changes to subjects that make Chris feel uncomfortable in his Mailbags. One issue was with Rosechu's tail being pointed, to which Chris attempts to get Alec to believe he meant for the tail to be dull all along and becomes angry with Alec points out he is lying. The subject changes to how Chris feels Asperchu is a living breathing creature in another universe with thoughts and feelings and wouldn't want to be named Asperchu. Alec claims that Asperchu can't want to be named something else because Asperchu doesn't exist, to which Chris repeatedly calls Alec "naive" for not believing in a cartoon world similar to what's seen in the movie ''Who Framed Roger Rabbit''. They both agree to disagree, and then talk about the lack of updates in Sonichu. Chris blames his biological clock on the inability to upload new pages and explains how the creative process of his work requires a pain-staking 30 minutes of typing dialogue. Chris admits to using photoshop but says since his comics are hand-drawn and hand-colored that in his opinion (and his mother's apparently) Sonichu is the superior comic of the two. Alec points out that he draws his comics by hand, even if it's with a tablet and that his art shouldn't and doesn't have any less "personality" that Chris' shit work. Chris focuses on the adspace again, hinting that his only intention is to get Asperpedia ads removed. Alec brings up Simonchu, and Chris denies Simonla was ever inspired by Simonchu and how Evan wants Simonchu and Simonla written out of the comic. Chris replies with Alec's talk about Evan taking legal action with "I'll think about it".

==Video==

{{#ev:youtube|LGB99JTZJes}}

==Transcript==

 '''Chris''': Hello?

 '''Alec''': Hi, is this uh, is this Chris?

 '''Chris''': Yea, this is Christian Chandler, may I help you?

 '''Alec''': Hey Chris, this is Alec Benson Leary again, how are you?

 '''Chris''': Oh! I would have expected you to call at 9:30, uh but anyway...

 '''Alec''': Oh! I actually did try to call at 9:30, didn't get an answer so I thought I'd try again, you-your quite a difficult man to get a hold of Chris. 

 '''Chris''': Hmm Yeah, i can talk for a few minuets, so lets try not to [unintelligible] this conversation.

 '''Alec''': Not at all, I don't..I don't wanna drag anything out. Um, well first I'll ask you if you have anything specific that you want to bring up, cause I know that you had to go kinda abruptly last time, and I thought maybe that there was a point you didn't get to or anything.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': Okay... Wanna go ahead with that?

 '''Chris''': Umm... well first off, you know...you know I have um...I have gone to the CWCikipedia recently, its the Ads are still super-sized, but, they are more of a mockery towards me now, and I do not appreciate that.

 '''Alec''': Yeeeaaah, I'm Sorry about that, Mao is kinda, he got a little bit of a temper, you know, h-he-he is kinda mad about this whole... the mailbag situation, emails getting deleted and all that sort of thing. You know, I-I-I um, I saw in, uh, one of your mailbags, that you said that I delete, or uh, modify a lot of my emails. I don't know where you got that impression, actually, I don't do that. You know, I try to answer every email I get thoughtfully, and fully.

 '''Chris''': Well, thats probably easy for you....probably easier for you because, yours are not as.. mean and cruel and condensating as the ones I have been getting.

 '''Alec''': Have you been getting a lot of mean ones that have not been go into the mailbag? Cause, the ones I've see... a lot of them, well they do get critical at points, but I... I dunno, it seems like they been, they just kinda wanna, you know, have some questions answered.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, But I wish they wouldn't havta go so critical.

 '''Alec''': Like, uh, what do you mean, like uh, what are some of the things that you found just kinda crossed the line

 '''Chris''': Like-Like they talk about... Like they talk about copyright issue and crap...

 '''Alec''': [Trying to talk] Well that is..that is kinda of an important issue, I mean....

 '''Chris''': [Chris interrupts] BUT-but I have my own Copyright registration, that slip of paper I got from the Virginia Library of Congress...

 '''Alec''': Yeah, uh, I noticed one of the copyright related e-mails was um, someone asked if they could see, just some letter, or some evidence Sega or Nintendo gave you, uh, permission to go with Sonic and Pikachu, and that kinda stuff for Sonichu's origin story. Um, you know, if you provided those, that would silence those kind of e-mails right away.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': I mean, you do have copyright of Sonichu, but you would still need to show Nintendos permission to publish it, you know what I mean?

 '''Chris''': Hmm...

 '''Alec''': 'Cause it has Pikachu in the origin story.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': Yeah, yeah, I think that would be a good idea to show everyone in the mailbag, you know, that would shut up that line of questioning right away.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, but there's... also... the homosexuals, and uh, other topics, ugh, I can't remember them off the top of my head. Yeah, there's quite a few.

 '''Alec''': Like the accusations that Rosechu is a boy? I think, that was kind of a big thing-

 '''Chris''': Yeah-

 '''Alec''': People were going after-

 '''Chris''': But I, I mean, yeah, that's only before the rainbow strike, I mean, the point where that Raichu- female Raichu is within the rainbow, that would be after the rainbow strikes that Raichu. 

 '''Alec''': Hmm.

 '''Chris''': And with the power of the- with the power of the Chaotic Crystals.

 '''Alec''': Well you know-

 '''Chris''': I-it was with a point, it was as point to the end of that tail, in the two panels that preceded it, the tail was definately dull at the end.

 '''Alec''': Uhh, well, you know, the- as far as I know, the original comic does have a point tail, like a male has, and that's- that's still on your website, isn't it?

 '''Chris''': I-

 '''Alec''': You know, one thing I thought about was the gender differences in the pokemon, that didn't, Nintendo didn't do that until a while after you created it, Sonichu, right? So, I mean, I just don't get why you didn't go with that. That would've been a good explanation, but instead you kinda lied to your fans.

 '''Chris''': What do you mean, lied? I did not lie, I mean, you look at the two pictures before the rainbow hit, the tail is dull on the tip.

 '''Alec''': Oh, well, I see that in your picture that's on the front of the Cwckipedia, but on the original comic he had a pointy tail, or she, I mean.

 '''Chris''': The original- 

 '''Alec''': I've seen the original.

 '''Chris''': That's because- look, outside, that's just a line that is going outside of the square, whatever goes outside, does not necessarily count.

 '''Alec''': Uh, it doesn't look like it goes, like, outside the panel here, but... I mean, y'know... I don't really know. I know that you don't... you probably should have corrected that mistake, but you left it in. I mean, I'm just trying to- I mean, I just kinda wish that thing had gotten nipped in the bud. It kinda sucks, but this is like, a huge point of contention right now.

 '''Chris''': Yeah. Al-also, you know, another thing, I've actually found, I've actually found a forum of my loyal fans, and I have just read some posts about the ads that have been placed in the Cwckipedia, and they really don't like 'em either.

 '''Alec''': Hmm.

 '''Chris''': So, I'm not alone in that. 

 '''Alec''': Well, alright. Well... you know, uh... if they wanted to buy the ad-space that's, I'm sure they could too. I mean, again, y'know, the ads, I'm gonna keep trying to talk to Mao but it's really his area. Mao's kind of the boss of the ads, I'm just kind of the artistic genius. Mao does the business work. 

 '''Chris''': Yeah, that definately do not appreciate that- that drawing of me, in a diaper, and then just copying and pasting my signature to that. That's just wrong.

 '''Alec''': Well, you know, um, I noticed that even after our last talk you continued referring Asperchu as Mitch. I thought we had that cleared away. I thought you knew he was Asperchu, I mean Asperchu is my original creation.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, maybe so, but still-

 '''Alec''': And I think you still have the impression that Asperchu is a Sonichu, and you know that's not true, right? Asperchu is not a Sonichu.

 '''Chris''': Hmm, yeah, okay, but still think about this, y-y-y-you picked- you gave him the condition of Aspergers.

 '''Alec''': Yes, that's correct. Oh! That's another thing. I think you, I think you thought that I gave everyone that appeared on my comic Aspergers, but only Asperchu has it. Just Asperchu.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] Well-

 '''Alec''': Okay, you were gonna say something?

 '''Chris''': A-anyway, still, I think you could understand, since you have Aspergers and conservely, with my Autism, that we would pref- we don't really don't wanna be treated as sep- as treated as quote-unquote, "special" because of our mental conditions, we want to be treated as equal individuals.

 '''Alec''': [over Chris] Well that's certainly true, but how do you think I've been portraying Asperchu as being treated y'know different?

 '''Chris''': Try putting yourself in the shoes of your- of your Asperchu. If- if you, I mean, not only would you want to be treated as an individual equal, but-

 '''Alec''': That's how I portray him, he does everything normal people do.

 '''Chris''': But you would not want a name that empathizes the mental condition, you want a name that is more manly-

 '''Alec''': Well y'know, Chris, we don't choose our names. Our names are given to us. Asperchu never chose his name. I mean, think of it this way, the name Asperchu, if you think of that as a detriment, I don't, but if you interpret the comic that way, think of it as a personal, sort of, character flaw, if you will, that he has to work to overcome. All good characters have character flaws.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, I mean-

 '''Alec''': And, and, it's fiction. Sometimes characters don't always live the happiest lives in fiction, but that's part of what makes good fiction.

 '''Chris''': Yeah. Hmm, yeah, but still, think about it, what if your parents had named you Asper?

 '''Alec''': Uhh...

 '''Chris''': Just to foretell that you had Aspergers, that you would have Aspergers.

 '''Alec''': Well...

 '''Chris''': You would not want that [stammers] you were being treated- wanting to be treated as an equal in society, you would not to be called Asper because-

 '''Alec''': But Chris-

 '''Chris''': Because that emphasizes the mental condition you have.

 '''Alec''': Okay Chris, that's part of the, again, character flaw Asperchu has things weighing him down, he has curses and... y'know, not literal curses, but he has detriments to his life that weigh him down as a character, and he has to work to overcome those. That's part of what makes a good character. You wouldn't make a character that's just all powerful and perfect in every way and has no real problems ever, would you? That'd be kinda boring. Complex characters have problems that they overcome.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': And it takes, it takes time, too, to overcome a serious problem, I mean, you just renamed him Mitch, and that wouldn't do it, y'know you can't just go and snap your fingers and just wave the problem away and- 1. That's not realistic, and 2. That doesn't make for good fiction, I mean, all the drama you're building up, y'know, your readers really wouldn't really like that if you just kinda hand-waved it away, don't you think?

 '''Chris''': Alright, yeah, okay, but still-

 '''Alec''': Think about it like this: Superman is named Superman because he's super, right? And y'know, Superman is one of the most- [Alec is cut off]

 '''Chris''': I mean- as- as-as an individual, within his own world, outside of your control, Asperchu would not want that name, he would be in agreement with me, and would probably want to change his name to something like Mitch.

 '''Alec''': Ah, but the thing there is, Asperchu is not outside of my control because it's a comic, and I am the creator and, y'know, manager of his comic universe. So, I- as his creator I decide what Asperchu wants and what he doesn't want, and what his personality is like.

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': I mean, don't you think?

 '''Chris''': Fairly. I mean, have you ever watched the movie, "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"

 '''Alec''': Yes I have, it was a good movie.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, yeah, you got the whole toon world there, and within that, it coincides with the comic as well, and every individual comic, published or unpublished, drawn altogether. And within the world, would reside your Asperchu, so he would be with his individual thoughts that you gave him [indistinct] with his individual thoughts, he would hate having the name of Asperchu 'cause it emphasized his mental problem. 

 '''Alec''': Umm...

 '''Chris''': His special condition. And he's like, in the process of wanting to on from that, and become more acceptable in society, that he would not want a name that would make him feel...

 '''Alec''': Okay...

 '''Chris''': So he's still living it, even after he's fully recovered from it.

 '''Alec''': Okay, but Chris, um, "Who Framed Roger Rabbit", that was still a movie, and everything in it was predetermined by the movie writers and director, and there is no alternate cartoon world in reality, I mean, cartoon characters don't actually think and feel things. Okay, he's a question-

 '''Chris''': Well, you are obviously naive about that, because you don't fully understanding that, that universe actually existing.

 '''Alec''': So you do believe that, um, when an artist creates a cartoon character, that character becomes real? That what you're saying to me?

 '''Chris''': Within that universe, yes.

[Wild laughter can be heard in the background]

 '''Alec''': But the universe is fake. I mean, the Asperchu universe exists on paper and in my computer. It's just, it's whatever I write it to be. Oh, here's a question for you. Okay, so if you think a character would want, you know, and appropriate name, a good name, not a name that calls them out on something, or sets them back, um... Sonichu is the name of a species, correct? I mean, there's Sonichus and Rosechus, those are a species, right?

 '''Chris''': Yeah, but, he was the first one, the first original Sonichu, and she was the original Rosechu-

 '''Alec''': So, wouldn't they want their own

 '''Chris''': [Indignant] And-and they each came up with their name, on their own, and they did not need a nickname to go with that.

 '''Alec''': Yeah, but Chris, if you're a human being would you be comfortable just being named, Human? Or Man? I mean, you wouldn't- would you be comfortable if the name Christian Weston Chandler didn't exist, and you were just called, Man, or Person or something?

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': I mean, y'know Homo Sapiens-

 '''Chris''': Yeah but I would [Chris and Alec talk over each other]

 '''Alec''': ...Homo Sapien.

 '''Chris''': Yes, but still-

 '''Alec''': Homo, homo.

 '''Chris''': I was not the first human being, and I actually had parents who gave me that name. Sonichu came in, he had to come up with his own name-

 '''Alec''': Well, Sonichu had you who gave him that name didn't he? I mean, within the comic, you Christian Weston Chandler are Sonichu's father right? I mean, why wouldn't, why wouldn't your cartoon self give him a name?

 '''Chris''':: Uh, that's the cartoon me, versus the real me.

 '''Alec''': Okay, but isn't the cartoon you... Okay, like you said cartoons are basically real, I mean, so shouldn't the cartoon version of you be just like you? Wouldn't you want to give your child a name? I mean you-

 '''Chris''': I did give him a name, he's the original Sonichu, so therefore, it's as such.

 '''Alec''': But all the other Sonichus also have nicknames, or secondary names, so, so the first Sonichu, I gotta think is feeling kinda left out. 

 '''Chris''': Well, he doesn't feel left out. He accepts that, and he's happy with it, just as Rosechu.

 '''Alec''':: Okay, well, I don't think Asperchu feels left out because, y'know, he's just my cartoon character. He's my property, y'know, he's my intellectual property, that's what he is. You can't have a person as property, so you know, he's my property, he's not a person, he doesn't feel things, he doesn't think.

 '''Chris''': Okay, well still, what if you could actually could see- what if you could actually could see the child with your girlfriend or wife? Then, would you feel that you own that child even after you have raised him from being a baby, to, let's say, late teenage years where that child would feel more like and individual and independent being?

 '''Alec''':: [clearly frustrated with Chris's nonsense] Chris, you do understand, that a child, a human being is substanially more that a comic character, right? They're not the same thing, they're not even close. Of course I would name a child, children are real, and children are not our property, I mean if I had a child, I would give it all the love and support it needed, but it is it's own person, he or she, I should say. Where as a comic character is just, it's whatever you draw on paper or in Photoshop. I mean, I draw Asperchu on paper, that's the only place he exists. And then I upload him onto my computer and that's where he exists, and he exists on the web. So I have a character, he grows, but he's never a person.

 '''Chris''': Hmm. Well anyway, this is confusing to think about. Okay- well- yeah...

 '''Alec''':: We can agree to disagree.

 '''Chris''': Okay, what if As- what if the shoe was on the other foot- what if Asperchu created you?

 '''Alec''':: Well then, I'd be a comic character, myself, and I wouldn't have any thoughts and feelings, so that's a moot point.

 '''Chris''': You think that comic character wouldn't have it's own thoughts and feelings?

 '''Alec''':: NO.

 '''Chris''': You are naive.

 '''Alec''':: Chris, you have told me that you think a comic character is fundmentally as much of a person as a real human being, that is the naive thought.

 '''Chris''': No, you are-

 '''Alec''':: I'm a writer, I'm like the god of the Asperchu world. I decide what goes on in Asperchu's world, I decide, who and what Asperchu is and what he thinks and feels, if anything, which he doesn't, because he's still just a character on paper, y'know, when I put the pen down, Asperchu stops being there. Nothing exists in Asperchu's world that I haven't drawn.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] Boy, you are-

 '''Alec''':: And it's naive to think that there's anything more.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs again]

 '''Alec''':: You know, I'm, uh- I think we should agree to disagree on this point.

 '''Chris''':Alright.

 '''Alec''': Um, because we have our own thoughts on that. Um, I kinda ask you about- I'm actually getting some letters about Sonichu, about why you're not updating daily, and I was kinda curious about that.

 '''Chris''': I- for your information, I am updating daily. I draw two pages- I draw and color my two pages a day. I can't help if I don't have access to my computer or if I can't get to it right away, besides which, my biological clock has been fickle on me and it's making me go- making fall asleep early.

 '''Alec''': Well, I understand-

 '''Chris''': And it's difficult to rearrange my schedule, and get back in- in a sync-syncronised routine like I would be.

 '''Alec''': Maybe you could get an alarm clock. You know, I- I'm just kinda curious, like, I know it takes, what, like an hour to do each page, about what you spend, I would kinda guess. Um, I'm just kinda confused why you'd spend an hour to draw a page, but not take that extra sixty seconds to upload it. I think consistency is important thing- 

 '''Chris''': But, wait, it could take- it takes more than sixty seconds to scan it in Photoshop, then upload it. It would probably take like half an hour for all that work.

 '''Alec''': I didn't know you did Photoshop work with your pages. What do you, what do you use photoshop for, if I may ask? I'm just kinda curious. I thought you just-

 '''Chris''': T-t-to change it from more hand-written text, to more legible typed text.

 '''Alec''': Y'know, If I remember right, I think kinda one of the criticisms you had about Asperchu was that it was not completely hand-drawn original. Because I do use Photoshop in part of my creative process, but it sounds like you do kind of the same thing. Which is, you know, that's fine. Digital, digital media is where our world is going, but I thought- see I thought you drew it all on paper and uploaded it.

 '''Chris''': I did draw it all on paper. The only part I edit in Photoshop is the text; what you reeead.

 '''Alec''': 'Kay, I thought so. Well, it just seems a little hypocritical, but you do use Photoshop in the creative process, but you critisized me for it. Don't you think?

 '''Chris''': No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the hand-drawing and you draw everything on your Photoshop with your computer mouse.

 '''Alec''': Well I don't-- here's what I do. I do sometimes draw the pages on paper, um, I'm kinda trying to shy away from that because, our society wastes so much paper, so I'm trying to be a little more socially responsible. But what I do, I use a tablet, and I draw on that, and that's basically the same thing as pen and paper, it's, uh, what I draw goes directly on the computer screen. So I don't use a mouse. 

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': Yeah, it's the same thing-

 '''Chris''': Okay, but still, it looks crappy compared to mine. Even my mother agrees.

 '''Alec''': Oh, hey, hey, hey, c'mon that's a little insulting Chris, what do you mean, "crappy"? I mean, my mother says my comic is the most beautiful comic she's ever seen too but, I kind of think that's because she's a supportive mother. You know, mothers are supposed to support their children in their endeavours. And I have, y'know, got 20,000 fans now that love it too. None of them are my mother. My mother doesn't actually use a computer, I just show her the print-outs.

[There is a brief silence]

 '''Alec''': Y'know I get complemented on my art all the time. 

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': I mean, it's okay to disagree. I just, I'm curious why you think it's crappy?

 '''Chris''': Because it's computer drawn. It's not originally hand-drawn.

 '''Alec''': I just told you, it is hand-drawn. It's hand-drawn on a tablet. What do you mean, it's not an original hand-drawn?

 '''Chris''': It don't have the old-fashioned original pencil or pen markings, that's what I have.

 '''Alec''': So, because I don't have smudge-marks on my paper, is that's what you mean? That was another reason I went with the tablet, because I got a lot of smudge-marks on my paper when I was doing math and I had to spend extra time erasing it. Y'know is-- okay, by comparison, could I say that our cars are not true original transportation because people should be using old-fashioned horses? You use Photoshop for lettering and effects. We're one in the same here, Chris.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs]

 '''Alec''': And-and again, I just don't see why, the exact method I use to draw determines the skill of my art. Weren't you um, I remember recently, didn't you put, like, a live picture of yourself in your comic for some Guitar Hero theme? I mean, you didn't draw that part in, did you?

 '''Chris''': I-I-It at least allows me, to put myself in my work. See, a bigger difference between drawing with a tablet or mouse versus hand-drawn is that you see more personality with the orig-- with the pen-marking, and color-- and marker coloring versus whats... whats digitally entered-

 '''Alec''': Well, if you feel that way. If you feel that way, I respect your opinion, but, I mean, y'know, 20,000 fans can't be wrong, and not a single one of them have ever said anything.

 '''Chris''': Okay well--okay well, l-let me give you a better example on that. Okay, say you got, uh, two letters, two exact same letters from a person, from the same person. One hand-written, and one computerized and printed, which one would you think would have more personality, or would appeal to you better?

 '''Alec''': I honestly don't remember the last time anyone wrote me a hand-written letter. I don't even remember the last time I wrote a hand-written letter, I type everything, every kind of- I mean, typing looks more professional.

 '''Chris''': Professional, yes, but-

 '''Alec''': I mean, hand-written wouldn't get you a job, or anything.

 '''Chris''': At least I have had all the practice of hand-writing, and that- there's more character, more personality put into it, in hand-writing versus what you would just see, everyday in a monosyncronic(?) sense.

 '''Alec''': Well, you know why you see it everyday, everywhere, Chris? You see it everywhere, because it works. Because that's what people prefer.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs]

 '''Alec''': I think we're getting kinda off-topic, I mean I just-- I kinda wanna go back to, um, I understand it can be difficult to get to your computer and upload things, you know in a timely fashion, sometimes, you're not at your computer, things like that, but, I mean, Sonichu's your franchise, a lot of fans I know are getting kind of, y'know, fed up that you don't have pages uploaded everyday. I mean, Sonichu is your, that's your franchise, right? I just, I dunno, I mean, I got a lot of stuff going on in my day too, but I make sure to get at least one or two pages uploaded everyday. Which has been more difficult since my school term started, 'cause I'm in full time school, and, y'know, I work still, I'm still working at the station but... that's just a recommendation, but... again, I know it's difficult, but I recommend that you try. That's all I'm saying.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, well, I am drawing- I have been drawing the pages, and like I said, I cannot help it if I can't upload on some days, but at least I do upload them in the bulk on when I can upload.

 '''Alec''': You know, for a while, for a couple months, you were uploading most everyday weren't you? I mean, has something, has something, has your schedule gotten busier recently or something?

Chris: I've been falling asleep earlier. And with that, it's hard- and with that it's harder for me to readjust my schedule.

 '''Alec''': You know Chris, if I fell asleep on my job, I'd probably lose my job. I mean, Sonichu is supposed to be your big franchise, right? I mean... if fell asleep while drawing Asperchu and I started missing days, I would buy myself and alarm clock. Or I would upload them earlier, before I knew I was gonna get tired, or whatever.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': It's just-

 '''Chris''': Anyway, anyway I haven't been able to get my schedule around and I just haven't been able to get it in sync yet.

 '''Alec''': What's uh... if I may ask, what's... has something been going on that's been throwing your schedule for a loop? I mean, you-you haven't made videos in the past couple of days but you know prior to that, you were making videos fairly frequently, mostly attacking me. 

 '''Chris''': Originally did-- originally when I did the videos it was not necessarily on a daily basis, that's not like, journal, a video is not like a journal to me.

 '''Alec''': Well but, you know, if you spend 5, 10, 15 minutes making a video, that's time you could be uploading a comic. But instead you make videos attacking me. 

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] Pl-plus, the battery power on my digital camera is fickle.

 '''Alec''': What does your digital camera have to do with uploading pages? I'm saying you shouldn't be using the camera, you shouldn't be making videos. You know why I haven't made any videos, Chris? It's cause I don't have time, I'm uploading pages that and-- that and I don't make death threats to people on the internet, that's not a... I mean, you know-- you know you really hurt my feelings when you started doing those Chris, because, like I said you started as my inspiration and a couple months later you became my troll.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs]

 '''Alec''': I know you have trolls, you know, it sucks.

 '''Chris''': Yeah.

 '''Alec''': It really sucks to have people attacking you like that, but you became my troll.

 '''Chris''': Alright well... you know, how 'bout you just tell Mao that I... if he just... I'll leave y'all alone, let y'all do your thang... y'all take your ads off my website.

 '''Alec''': That's just not a... that's not a sound business move for me, Chris. Those ads are bringing in a lot of viewers

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] So, put 'em on another website.

 '''Alec''': Well, what if that website tells me that, y'know, they don't want them there, then should I move to another website, and then another, and then another... Mao's job is to bring in fans for me, that's what he's doing and he's doing it well, and that's why I keep him-

 '''Chris''': Well, Mao- Mao never asked me before he could- before he put anything up there or before he paid off Jack Thaddeus.

 '''Alec''': Well, he doesn't have to, that's the way ads work. You buy adspace that's publically available. Advertising is not under your control.

 '''Chris''': Ye-Yeh- But I was- but I was never there to witness that monetary transaction, I was never there for that quote-unquote "agreement".

 '''Alec''': You don't own the site, Chris.

 '''Chris''': ...what?

 '''Alec''': You don't own that site. Right? I mean, the money from the ads go to keep the site up, that's my understanding.

 '''Chris''': [Sighs] Actually, you're wrong, you see, Mao ga-put- gave that to 2000 Euros directly to Jack Thaddeus actually put that 2000 Euros into the Cwcipedia funds, so therefore, Mao never saw his money in his money in the Cwcipedia funds, they just went straight to Jack.

 '''Alec''': Um, I'm not really sure. I've never spoken to Jack, I don't know anything about what he and Mao talked about, y'know I'd kinda like to help you out, honestly I would, but I'm still a little... I'm a little miffed that um... even after we had a pretty good talk last time, but you still kept going with this whole Mitch business. I mean, you took my character, and altered him. You say, you say that I didn't get permission to use Sonichu, but you didn't get permission to use Asperchu either.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, well...

 '''Alec''': Or Simonchu! I-I-I almost forgot to mention that, Evan wanted me to talk to you about that, about using Simonchu. Y'know, Simonchu was his creation and you used that without perimission. And he asked you several times, not- to get rid of Simonchu and Simonla, or whatever her female form is. But- 

 '''Chris''': Yeah, but actually, Simonla was never very inspired by Simonchu... I took an original Rosechu, I changed her to a ground color, gave her the complexion, added an armadillo shell, and then a few drills in appropriate faces- places.

 '''Alec''': So kind of how I took a Sonic, and make him yellow, and gave him a goatee and glasses, and a buddah belly, and thus was born Asperchu. And, it was- you thought it was a parody, but it just happened to be... that kinda what you're going with, for there? I mean, why didn't you just say that to Evan in the first place, 'cause he has been e-mailing you for a long time 

 '''Chris''': I-I told him- I responded- I told him that in response- in response to why those messages in the mailbag, but apparently, he had not read that.

 '''Alec''': Okay, uhm... let's see, I'm looking at the Simonla at your Cwcipedia here, um, you say that... I'll just read what it says here: About, on or before August 26, 2008, I received and e-mail from Evan George, uhh... submitting his Sonichu fan-art to me, then later submitted his idea for Simonchu, it did not strike as good at first but for a few months, I wanted to create a ground type, um... so from Simonchu, I created Simonla Rosechu. That's on the Simonla article for your Cwcipedia. I mean that's, smoking gun, Chris, that's proof, that you used Simonchu as a base.

 '''Chris''': [Groans]

 '''Alec''': I'm... y'know I'm not trying to attack you with this but I really think this is Evan's, that you should get rid of Simonchu and Simonla, write 'em out. 'Cause the facts are right there Chris.

 '''Chris''': Well, actually it was not like that, I typed it in because Evan was badgering me as such, and it just stuck in my head, and pretty much stuck... when I typed it in originally. 

 '''Alec''': Why would that just stick in your head, why would that happen? Why would it stick in your head, unless it's true?

 '''Chris''': [Trying to think of an excuse]I put it in there to make a mockery out of him!

 '''Alec''': Well, then you kind of... kind of lied about it to people, didn't you? I mean, 'cause everyone else thinks that's the honest truth

 '''Chris''': Well, I can stick- well I can change that in [indistinct].

 '''Alec''': Doesn't matter, you already established it. I mean, when it comes to, like, copyright, and that sort of thing, Chris, I mean, the one thing that matters more that anything else is documentation, and history. And all of your documentation shows that you used Simonchu as inspiration. You acknowledge lega liability here. Whether it was a joke or not, you wrote it like it was real. And Evan's been pester-

 '''Chris''': [Chris lets out a big sigh]

 '''Alec''': ...ing me to talk to you, 'cause apparently you're ignoring his e-mails... although you ignore my e-mails too. I mean, like I said, it was a pain just to get a hold of you. I mean, for a guy who has so much to say to me, you are hard to get a hold of.

 '''Chris''': Hmm.

 '''Alec''': I mean, you, you, I'm just I wanna let you know, you do need to comply with Evan's demands, 'cause he's talking about litigation, and that if he want to get a lawyer over this. He said that he'd, that he'd back off if you acknowledge, in the comic and write Simonchu and Simonla out, and y'know, say that they will be done and gone forever. He has the copyright for Simonchu. I mean, would you be willing to do that? Write 'em out? 

 '''Chris''': I'll con- I'll think about it.

 '''Alec''': Okay, well don't think too long. I mean, this is a serious issue.

 '''Chris''': [Sigh]

 '''Alec''': I'm just- I'm just trying to give you advice, Chris.

 '''Chris''': Yeah-

 '''Alec''': I don't wanna see litigation out of this.

 '''Chris''': Hmm... anyway I'm feeling tired right now.

 '''Alec''': Okay well, I'll let you go, um... you have a good night, Chris.

 '''Chris''': Alright, goodnight.

 '''Alec''': Goodnight.

{{Transcription}}

{{succession|label=[[Alec Benson Leary calls]]|prevlink=[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 1|Chris and Alec Call 1]]|nextlink=[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 3|Chris and Alec Call 3]]|}}

==External Links==

*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGB99JTZJes The Call on Youtube]

[[Category:Phone calls]]

Talk:Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2

2010-02-10T16:12:24Z

Joson: Created page with 'I'm gonna be transcribing this. Hopefully won't take too long.--~~~~'

I'm gonna be transcribing this. Hopefully won't take too long.--[[User:Joson|Joson]] 16:12, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke

2010-01-17T10:33:18Z

Joson: /* Transcript */

[[Image:EloquentArgument.JPG|thumb|Chris's closing statement.]]
'''Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke''' (officialy '''01172010 - Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke''') is a video uploaded by [[Chris]] in the early hours of 17 [[January 2010]]. After Chris finally changed his [[Chris and fashion|shirt]], he decided to read every page of [[Asperchu]] and give a critique of Alec's comic. Surprisingly, it's not very favorable, and Chris spends almost ten minutes whining about all of the things he doesn't like about it, including a lot of stuff that [[Chris and hypocrisy|Chris does in his own comic]]. He then threatens Mao, Alec, and [[Evan]] (but for some reason, not [[Sonichu is Dead|Sean]]) with the terrible might of his [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|pastor]] (who disapproved of [[Vivian Gee|Vivian's]] [[A_Girl_who_Brought_Down_the_World|book]]) and the [[Lies|FBI]].

Chris also heavily implies that his [[Patti|dead dog]] is now some kind of evil spirit with the power to kill.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = 01172010 - Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke
| image = {{#ev:youtube|RdBB9q0oxQA}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 17 January 2010
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Comics.png]] Comics
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] Rage
| Saga = {{Asperchu}} [[Asperchu]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalbluegrayshirt.png]] Vert. Blue Gray
| previous = [[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L]]
| next = [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|Current]]
}} </center>

==Description==

Obvious C.W.C. Slanders/References: -BIG BELLY -Man Boobs -Goatee -Glasses -wears MY shirts -Patti-Clone -Unapproved Recreation of myself -SETS ME ON FIRE in Book C, Pages 29 and 30!!!

Graphic Nudity/Sexual Images: Book 0 Pages 3, 10, 13, 14, 18, Book A Pages 12, 13, 18, 19, 23, 29, Book B Pages 1, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 11, 12, 13, 15, 18, 19, 20, 22, 24, Book C Page 2

Homosexual References: Book 0 Pages 13, 14, 18, 20, 24, Book B Page 26, Book 1, Page 8, 9, 12, 14, 21

Non-Approved CWC/Sonichu Use/References: Book 0 Pages 19-24, Book B Pages 25-32, Book C and Book 1

Graphic Language: Book 0 Pages 3, 9, 12, 15, 17, 18, 24, Book A Pages 1, 7, 9, 13, 15, 17, 18, 20, 22, Book B Pages 1, 5, 6, 7, 8, 12, 18, 20, 28, Book C Pages 2, 3, 7, 19, 33 and Book 1

Anti-Religious: Books A and B

==Transcript==
[[Image:pattysvengefulsoul.jpg|thumb|Patty will have your soul for dinner tonight]]
Captain's log, stardate January 17th 2010.

I am here at this point recording this video to make it perfectly clear. Although it was a bit of a mistake with that last video I made, but you know what? Regardless of that video, I did- I should not have had to make such a video. because I can prove- I can just show ya'll the evidence, [''Chris grabs his camera and starts walking towards his tv''] that I have just read through the entire bunch of pages, of the- of Alec's Asperchu. Unedited, all fresh from the website, organized by page number, in my playlist.

[''The camera shoots downwards, a list passes by it momentarily, before Chris's TV comes into focus. There appear to be an array of comic pages on screen, set against a horrendously gay purple background.'']

First off to name a few things, there's- there are the obvious... dirty slanders! [''The cover of Asperchu 0 comes into focus on the TV''] And obvious references to which I mean the [[Obesity|old Buddha belly]], that I [[Lie|used to have]], exaggerated manboobs, and even the goatee I used to have- I had one time, and he makes them- and he makes his Asperchu character wear nearly every [[Chris and fashion|shirt]] I wear. Nearly every shirt! And a crappy copy of a medal! My shirts.

[''The cover disappears, and Chris scrolls through the list of comics, finally picking a page in which a man is talking to a dog that really doesn't look anything like [[Patti]].''] And then to make matters worse, he goes and be...smirches my old- my dog! By making a crap- by making a crappy cop- crappy copy of my dog! My- Patti will- the spirit of Patti will [[Chris and religion|have his soul for dinner tonight]]! she will be haunting your [[Dreams|nightmares]], Mr. Leary.

[''Screen goes back to page selection, picking a page that has a picture of Asperchu's Take on [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]'']

And of course, even including the unapproved recreation of my character, of my person, within his pages, as you can see right here. You can find all these on his Asperpedia. [''screen returns to page select''] that was issue C page 19 by the way.

And then even worse! Starting on page C29 [''Chris selects the page with Metal Asperchu preventing Ian from shooting Asperchu''], he set me on fire! He set me on fire! [''Chris moves to the next page''] and in even worse, he mimicks (?) me on fire on page 30! I swear, if that ain't the [[Gun Comic|most outrageous thing]] that he has ever done against me.

[''Back to page select''] but I could get, I could definitely reference a few more instances of where he actually is considering peeing on himself within his own comic series. Starting of course with a few from his first book, [[Sonichu 8|of Graphic nudity or sexual reference]]! Of page three of his zero book. Even worse off, on page 10, while he's in a Burger King! With all his god-damned homosexual references as well!

[''Chris shuffles through a variety of pages featuring the Asperchu date plot in book one. [[Fail|None of them contain any homosexual references]]. He then returns to the page select.''] And he's done a whole number of them I could read you a list off of. You can find these is- find these nude images on pages, zero, book zero pages 3 10 13 14 18 and book A 12 13 18 19 23 29. Book B 1 4 5 6 7 8 11 12 13 15 18 20 22 24 AND book C page 2! They put in so many, they put in so many homosexual references between book zero, B and one.

And he uses Uncensored Swear words! Such as [''Camera swings back to Chris''] shit, and ass! In between all- in between all- his books! So many [[Chris and hypocrisy|god-damned]] of those. And his A and B books, are anti-religious! Anti-religious! In those two books! That little son of a bitch, he's basically peeing on his own self.

Now look, I'll admit I have done my little share of nudity within the comi- within my- within a few pages- within a couple of pages, but they were censored by either images of [[Lie|lemon for vagina, or bananas for dicks]]. [''Chris scratches the back of his head''] And it was f-and da and da and that book was finally finalized and organized so that it be 'propriate for all for all those of ages, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|TV Y7]]...and such. And I and if I ever said a swear word within my book, I would censor it, but [''voice cracks''] but he does not censor his own swear words.

But like I said [''Chris reaches down for his script''] he's basically gone to the things aga-he's basically mocking me with the references of myself. Between my between the b-between the belly, the manboobs, the goatee and glasses, numerous shirts, a fake medal, wearing-h'yeah-a c'a-copy of MY DOG, an unapproved recreation of myself and my Son-and my characters, and even SETS ME ON FIRE [''Chris starts wandering around the room, keeping the camera on his face''] and makes my and makes what is makes his w-and makes HIS quote-unquote Sonichu clone go against me as being as not being the original creator of the original Sonichu. Now, s-the original Sonichu of that thing can be caught in the wild, so therefore afar as far as I'm concerned, that's just ano-that's just another one he caught from the wild, and drew hisself a clone basically. Just another individual, aside from aside from the original Sonichu that only lives in CWCville.

And also, in reference to the un-not 'proved use within book number zero on pages 19 through 24, including-''including''-the homosetsual references, he supposedly thinks there's a, that, he supposedly thinks that there's this law change in CWCville at it is wrong for him to quote CWCville at all within his book. And no such changes, as he has said, has happened within CWCville. [''Stops and grabs camera vigorously with both hands and looks directly into it''] He wishes he knows my Sonichu, Rosechu, and all my electric hedgehogs as well as I do, but he can not, because he is not me, the original creator. [''Resumes wandering around the room''] HE IS NOT ME.

So uh I am send this message again to Alec, Evan, and even Mao--I have less offense with Sean by the way--but to those three...

[''Chris flips off the camera and gives a two-and-a-half-second raspberry'']

DIE. DIE IN HELL. And I hope the soul of my late dog eats at your souls and kills you in your sleep.

[''Gives a creepy uncomfortable stare at the camera as he slowly switches the hand holding it'']

But aside from that, his book his book is the pages within the so-called Asperchu...series? [''scratches the back of his head, pauses to look up at the ceiling for a moment''] They are definitely ludicrous and horrendous and horrific. [''starts moving around again, picks up a book, then wanders some more''] Even a horrific s-even as horrific as within Vivian Gee's own book. And my pastor rissala-Elizabeth Hoss, my pastor has read the book from cover to cover, and she HATES it. Sh-my reverend hates it. And I don't like it either because it is of disgrace, and slander, and mockery of my person and my character. Just about as much, but ak-choo-lee this [''points to the TV''] is worse. The Asperchu and everything there, that is worse than that book. I'm sorry Vivian, but that book is just no good. And I'm definitely gonna let my Elizab-let my pastor know about the Asperpedia and the Asperchu and tru all the pow-through her powers within her church and the congregation and even the '''''F-B-I''''', we will see you in Minnesota, and take you down personally, Mister '''''ALEC BASON LARRY!'''''

[''pause, head scratch''] We get the FBI on our side. [''long pause''] Your mockery of my person is not appreciated!

Udder'n dat, I leave with most everybody else in peace. Have a good day. Except for you three of which I mentioned earlier.

==See Also==
*[[Asperchu]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L]]|nextlink=[[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|Current]]|}}

{{Captain's Log}}

To Clyde and Jack.MOV

2010-01-08T19:29:18Z

Joson: /* Remixed */

'''To Clyde and Jack''' (originally posted as '''To Clyde and Jack.MOV''') is a video uploaded by [[Chris]] on 27 [[December 2009]]. Chris tells both [[Jack Thaddeus]] and [[Clyde Cash]] to [[Chris and anger|commit suicide and burn in hell]]. Chris continues to be butt-hurt over [[Homos|homosexuals]], telling Jack and Clyde that they are hurting the cause of gay rights and claiming [[List of Chris's lies|he has "Gay Friends"]]. Then he reminds us to [[Chris and hypocrisy#"I fear them all" — Homosexuality|stay straight]].

Chris spends much of this video scratching himself with alarming frequency, pausing at least 12 times to scratch, adjust his collar, hitch up his pants, or otherwise address some source of discomfort. The [[Chris and Health#Hygiene|cause]] remains unknown, but it should be noted that Chris has worn the same [[Chris and fashion|long-sleeved polo shirt]] now for four days straight.

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}

<center>

{{Infobox/video
| name = To Clyde and Jack
| image = {{#ev:youtube|CU8-3ba-R1E}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 27 December, 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Homosn.png]] [[Homos]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]]
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga
| previous = [[Download For Play Only]]
| next = [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
Uhh, this is not a canon [[Captain's Log]], but I have a statement that I feel that I need to make. Both... [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Jack Thaddeus]]. This message goes to them!

You both think you're so tough. You both think you're so righteous because you're trying to overthrow [[Chris|somebody who hates homosexuals]]. Well you know what? [[Lie|I'm okay with associating with homosexuals]], but I—not be—but the—not beyond friendship. I'll be willing to be friends with homosexuals, I even have a [[gal pal]] [[Anna McLerran|who's a lesbian]]. As a—as a—she's a good friend, as well! But I'm just saying [''gestures wildly''] nothing further with the male homosexuals!

And as long as they keep it behind their closed doors, I don't give a damn.

And both of you, Jack and Clyde. Both of y'all want me to like homosexuals more, a little bit, but you both—you—you're not—put, the aspect of anybody, within that—within that lifestyle—who's living that lifesty—who's living that lifestyle. You're not putting any of those people in bright light! If anything, you're making the light of homosexuality so much God-damn worse! You both are definitely '''evil seeds that just need to be put into hell'''!

So not only would you be good both you Clyde Cash and Jack Thaddeus, be doin' me a favor, but you'd be doing your whole God-dang homosexuality community a favor, by '''committing suicide, killing yourselves and rotting in hell'''!

And [[Vivian]], I'm [[Chris and remorse|sorry]] about saying that about your cousin, but that's just the way I feel! [[Death threats#Vivian Gee|I got nothing against you Vivian]].

[''brief pause wherein Chris scratches himself and sighs'']

Anyway, that's the way I feel. Both of you two can just go rot in hell. For all I care, and for the whole world who care—for the whole world who cares.

Also I just want to remind everybody that, uh, [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|the revised version of the text]] that's on that god dang [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page is up on the [[CWCipedia]]. You find a link to it under the portal on the CWCipedia. That's all I will say about that.

So that's just my point—that's just all those—all my views, and how—what's actually true and false, and exaggerated, from within that—all that text. Right.

[''raises hands, closes eyes''] Okay, well, to most everyone, [''sigh''] stay straight and not being swayed in any other direction. That's me. Alright. [''flashes peace sign''] Have a good day, most of you. And Jack and Clyde, [[Chris and religion|suicide, death, rot in hell]].

==Remixed==

<center>{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = three point plan for living
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Pyau0NoVyYg}}
| Stardate = 27 December 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/TheGreggMays '''TheGreggMays''']
| Subject = [[Chris]]
| Video Type = Remix
| Other Info = SUICIDE. DEATH. ROT IN HELL.
}}</center>

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Download For Play Only]]|nextlink=[[Address to my CWCipedia SysOP]]|}}

{{Troll Videos}}

[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Chris Destroys His Vibrator

2010-01-08T06:37:40Z

Joson:

"'''Chris Destroys His Vibrator'''" (officially "'''ECV 00050'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] explains why he had to make [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009|the two videos]] suggesting that he was [[gay]], in order to satisfy an agreement with [[Clyde Cash]]. He then attempts to honor another agreement with Clyde by destroying his [[vibrator]]. Or rather, he ''tries'' to destroy his vibrator, [[fail]]s, and simply takes it apart in a manner that would allow him to easily reassemble it. Many experts believe that ten seconds after filming this clip, Chris was already hastily putting his dildo back together, his anus hungering for its sweet, sweaty, [[Navy|salty]], poo-covered, rancid delights.

Chris apparently doesn't seem to understand that if he was actually straight, he would've disposed of the dildo the moment he got it instead of storing it in his room.

It is implied in this video that Christian could not issue this retraction until "one man" emailed him to say he recognized the sooper-sekrit clues in the previous videos. Apparently, if no one had solved the mystery Chris would have been forced to live as a [[homos]]exual forever.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris Destroys His Vibrator
| image = {{#ev:youtube|UiJCri7IhwA}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 06 February 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Homosn.png]] [[Homos]]
| Saga = [[Image:Julie_saga.png]] [[Julie]] Saga [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga
| Shirt = {{StraightWhiteLinesShirt}} STRAIGHT White Lines
| previous = [[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet#Take_2|Chris Comes Out of the Closet, Take 2]]
| next = [[CWC Update 8 February 2009#Video|CWC Update 8 February 2009]]
}}</center>

{{quote|I was lying out of my ass!|Chris, who is [[lie|definitely not a homo]].}}

===Transcript===

[''smacks [[camera]]'']

Hello.

Y'all may—some of you may have seen the, uh, video, which—of which I recently ''up''…lo—''loaded''… sayin’ that I was, uh… of the wrong… orientation. But any—but I w—I wanted to let y'all know that… I on—I did that… to save the life… of a trusted [[Julie|gal-pal]]. And she is eternally grateful from—to me for it. So, th—so, yes, as you can tell from my… non-verbal ''clues'', I was lying out of my ass! But I did it to save a l—to save ''her'' life, 'cause… [[Clyde Cash]]… would've harmed her, but I have gotten ''his word'' that, uh, he would not lay a finger on her.

And also, I had to make another… slight promise—uh… another promise, after making that—after ''that'': that I, uh, get rid of some… of my… unnecessary possessions. I wanted to let—I wanted to, uh, let him know, anyway, that I've already started. [''reaches off-camera for something'']

I destroyed… [''drops it, picks it up, puts it back in his hand''] ''this''. [''presents a disassembled [[vibrator]]'']

[''jump cut to Chris (apparently pre-disassembly) trying to snap the vibrator in half with his bare hands'']

[''jump cut to Chris really straining to break the vibrator'']

[''jump cut to Chris simply pulling the vibrator's two halves apart as they're designed to come apart'']

[''jump cut to Chris pulling the motor out of its half'']

[''jump cut to Chris holding the two halves in one hand'']

Dun-dun-''dunnn''! [''holds the pieces out like the [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Card_Crusher Card Crusher] before throwing them down'']

The—''that'' deed is done. I am ''straight''. ''I am straight.''

And it only—and it took me the, uh, one time… where I actually had to say the word… that I hated so much… for the first time in my life, ever. And then, later, it took… one man to, uh, send me an e-mail, lettin' me know that he ''realized'' the non-verbal clues… leading to—like, I was being forced to do that, and I had to lie out my ass.

Y'all can, uh, view the previously uploaded video… in its originality… [''sniffles''] and unaltered spec—in an unaltered—unaltered sense in my current Yah—[[YouTube]] account. But… I think I have proven myself well enough. I was holding onto my ''manhood''—my straightness—by having [[Optimus Prime]] in my lap… [''reaches off-camera for poster and holds it up''] and my [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] behind me… that I look at every night to help keep me straight. [''puts poster away'']

I was ''born'' straight, and I will never be changed that way.

Thank you.

==Remixes==

<center>{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan vs. Vibrator
| video = {{#ev:youtube|_Uga4JA354o}}
| Stardate = 8 February 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/RosechusPickle '''RosechusPickle''']
| Subject = [[Chris]]
| Video Type = Remix
| Other Info = A battle of epic proportions.
}}</center>

<center>{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Christian Weston Chandler: Test your might!
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ydcRfctzkjI }}
| Stardate = 12 February 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/MajorIronwood '''MajorIronwood''']
| Subject = [[Chris]]
| Video Type = Remix
| Other Info = FINISH HIM!
}}</center>

==See also==

*[[Sign Destruction Video]]
*[[Sex toys]]
*[[Homos]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 8 February 2009]]|}}
{{Troll Videos}}

{{Clyde Saga}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries|2009-02-06]]

CWC is Sad

2010-01-08T05:52:11Z

Joson: /* Video */

"'''CWC is sad'''" (officially "'''11112009'''") is a video uploaded on 10 [[November 2009]] in which Solid Chris ([[Ian Brandon Anderson]]) cries over the marriage of Liquid Chris ([[CChanSonichuCWC]]) and [[Kacey]], showing an intense amount of [[stress]]. He's also understanding and calm, which is quite strange from someone who just recently drew a comic explicitly depicting himself [[Sonichu Special 4|shooting his unarmed romantic rival]] barely days ago. This is obviously an [[Fail|attempt at sympathy]] from Kacey. The effect is somewhat ruined when Ian gets her name wrong at the end, calling her "Katey".

It would seem Ian has done something to fix his [[PSEye]], as the reduced picture quality is more in line with the videos filmed with that camera rather than the one he started using in [[For Kacey II]], and only an occasional skip is heard in the audio. He is also wearing the same shirt that he drew himself wearing in [[Sonichu Special 4]], which was leaked on 8 November 2009. Given [[Chris and health|Solid Chris's hygiene]] and the events of the last several days, it's not entirely out of the question that he's been wearing that shirt for almost a week.

Note that Ian prefaces this video by saying that Kacey hung up on him before he could tell her any of this. If he is referring to the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]], then the reality of the situation is that he hung up on Kacey moments before she could officially break up with him, like the dickless loser he is.

When it first appeared, many trolls wondered whether this video might be a sign that Chris had finally been "broken." As it turned out, this was not to be the case, for a contrived moment of pure luck was enough to give Chris's [[Heart level|shattered heart a speedy recovery]], and Chris popped up on YouTube again just [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|a day later]] with a copyright certificate for ''[[Sonichu]]'', showing no signs that his breakup with Kacey had any lasting effect.

== Video ==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = 11112009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|7OK4ewK2ewc}}
| Stardate = 10 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Tragedy.png]] Tragedy
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| previous = [[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You|Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You]]
| next = [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day]]
}}
</center>

===Transcript===
[''close up on Ian's face, which reveals that his expression is grim, and he [[sigh]]s before beginning to speak'']

Well, Kacey, I... just letcha know... because you hung up when I was, was trying to say it....

[''a short intake of breath: he is trying not to cry'']

I'm sorry for hurting you and mistreating you, but, this, is a lot, it's some...—I's...mixed it with honest truth... uhh.. but, you know, it's fine....

[''Ian chokes back another sob'']

If you feel that [[CChanSonichuCWC|your Chris]] will make you happy, it's fine. Congratuwations on your wedding. I wish you and Chris all the happiness in the world. [''sob''] I'll say... I'll say a prayer for you, for a lovely wedding and a safe honeymoon....

[''Ian sniffles repeatedly, followed by several sighs, obviously on the verge of breaking down'']

At least I.. I care about you, Kacey. You mean...a lot to me. [''sniffle''] For more...[[China|more than just a friend]]. You have every right to be happy.

[''another long pause, sniffles, sighs'']

I guess I'll see you around, or hear or talk to you again or...... I guess.

[''Chris sings briefly.'']

"It's another day...."

But anyway, take care of yourself. Stay safe. God bless you. You're a sweet gentle caring person, tender loving care, Katey. I love you.

[''Ian looks up and away, and the video ends.'']

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You|Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You]]|nextlink=[[Red Letter CWC Certified Day]]|}}
{{Template:Sweetheart Videos}}
{{Template:The Cwcivil War of 2009}}

Greetings to Kaceys Folks

2010-01-07T03:18:00Z

Joson: /* Video */

'''Greetings to Kaceys Folks''' is a video uploaded on 31 [[October 2009]] (because he wasn't invited to a party or anything, and probably wouldn't have enjoyed ''Rocky Horror'') where, being an [[Niggos|old-fashioned]] kinda guy, impostor [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] introduces himself to [[Kacey]]'s parents. In order to present himself as a [[List of Chris's Lies|decent human being]], he makes many false statements about himself, and shows that he's blatantly unaware of his own [[fail]]ures, [[Autism|shortcomings]], and [[Chris and anger|serious anger management issues.]] He also appears satisfied with his [[CWC 30 Push Ups|recent video demonstration that he cannot do push-ups.]]

"A Whole New World" from Disney's ''Aladdin'' plays throughout, leftover from [[My Half of A Whole New World for Kacey|his previous video]] which was directed to Kacey.

==Video==
{{quote|Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Dee, I am Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, VA; birthname: Christopher; alias: Ricardo.|Ian's description text for the video}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Greetings to Kaceys Folks
| image = {{#ev:youtube|28nfQzlk3-Q}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 31 October 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| previous = [[My Half of A Whole New World for Kacey]]
| next = [[I AM STRONG]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
[''"A Whole New World" is heard in background'']

Good day, Mr and Mrs ''D'', [[Kacey]]'s parents. How are you today? I'm good. I'm okay. Hm. But anyway, I am making this video directed to... [''removes [[glasses]]''] yeah, directed to you both. You know. I am definitely better than the uh, [[real Chris|previous Chris]] that uhh, [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|ya'll got to know]]. Who recently went a little cra- he recently went ''[[Re to Chris No 2 - SHE IS MINE NOW|crazy]]''... and all that, but- but this is not about tha- this is not about him, this is about me. I am 27 years old, I stand a good 5'10". I am [[Power|very strong]], a matter of fact [[CWC 30 Push Ups|I just did thirty push-ups]] which you can see in a recent [[YouTube]] video on this same YouTube account.

I feel like I am [[honest]], [[List of Chris's lies|loyal]] and [[Monthly tugboat|reliable]]. I like to- I prefer to keep [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|a]] [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|soft]] [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!|spoken]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|tone]] [[Sign Destruction Video|of]] [[Chris Loses It|voice]]. [''glances off camera nervously''] Bu- but when I have to, I can be [[Chris and anger|argumentative and uh...and ss-such]]. I like pu- I like to keep things in long thoughts, you know. It takes sometimes takes me a while to think about things, but yeah like you know if it doesn't take much thought or if I can come up with a decision my way and [''click''] quick as- quick as- quick like that... I mean like, uhh, yeah, like you know... you know, it definitely took a while, you know, after getting to know Kacey to realize that I that I loved her- that I care about her very much and I [[love]] her.

But anyway. I feel like I am of [[April 16 Fetish Vids|good boyfriend material]]. Like I said because of my honest- my honesty and reliability and b- and my loyalty. So, uh, so hopefully with your consent, uhh... ya'll will allow me to, uh, get me [[Fuck quest|closer with your daughter]] in communication and in... you know, [[china|location]]. She and I have already met in person, s-she can tell you herself about her first impressions o-of me and as well as seconds impressions because we met a second time as well. Hmm. But anyway, there was a but anyway, I-anyway when the time comes I look forward to meeting you both. So.. I bid y'all a safe and pleasant day. Thank you.

==See also==
*[[My Half of A Whole New World for Kacey]]
*[[Re to Chris No 2 - SHE IS MINE NOW|SHE IS MINE NOW]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[My Half of A Whole New World for Kacey]]|nextlink=[[I AM STRONG]]|}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler

2010-01-07T03:12:30Z

Joson:

On 3 [[November 2009]] [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] uploaded two videos for [[Kacey]], one of him playing ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'', and a brief preface.

"'''Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler'''" is a creepy ''LittleBigPlanet'' level Ian decided to make for his [[sweetheart]] <s>instead of drawing a [[comic]] special</s>. Immediately after playing through this level (in which he shoots [[Liquid Chris]] to death) he plays through the "First Date Level" he originally made for [[Julie]] in Valentine's Day 2009, proving exactly how lazy he can be and how little he thinks of the women he claims to [[Fuck quest|love]]. The characters in this level seems to portray — poorly — a version of the real [[CChanSonichuCWC|Chris Chan]], Ian and what can only be viewed as [[Kacey]], on fire.

The preface video (uploaded by Ian as "'''11032009 Preface to Rescuing Kacey'''") appears to be taken in Ian's garbage-filled kitchen (where the family computer is) as opposed to the more familiar confines of his garbage-filled room. There is a surprising amount of Snoopy memorabilia in the background, and it is unknown whether this is Ian's hoarded crap or his parents' hoarded crap. We can also see in the sea of junk behind him a shape reminiscent of the [[Sex toys|fake pair of mammaries]] who keep on appearing in his videos of late. "Take Me Home Tonight" by Eddie Money plays in the background. It's a track in the latest ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' game, which is Ian's source for new [[Chris and music|music]].

Ian's [[hair]] seems to have grown -- or has been matted down by [[Chris and health|grease]] -- since [[I AM STRONG|two days ago]], where he sported an odd buzz cut. Here, Ian's hair appears even more bizarre, being very short except for rudimentary bangs which both cover and call attention to his receding hairline.

Once again, he shows us the only skill where he doesn't totally [[Fail|fail]], his capacity of playing video games made for kids (though admittedly, he's not actually ''good'' at the game, but he does manage to get all the way through his horrible levels without dying). [[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special|Previous]] [[Animal Crossing Documentary|attempts]] at this type of video have been done on ''[[Animal Crossing]]''. Those video productions are the only ways he found to achieve any decent result in a self-made product.

A [[Sonichu Special 4|comic depicting this level]] was later leaked by Liquid.

==Preface video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler Preface
| image = {{#ev:youtube|Kb_j3RxM3dc}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 3 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| Other = [[Image:Directfeed.png]] Machinima
| previous = [[Apology for 9/11 Joke]]
| next = [[Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler#Gameplay video|Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler Gameplay]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''Radio playing in background. Station identification followed by Eddie Money's "Take Me Home Tonight."'']

The following presentation is for-- is for ka-- is for my-- is for my girlfriend [[Kacey]]. How ya doin', girl? I love you. Hm.

Anyway uh, [''moves camera back a little bit''] I had a few technical difficulties with the ma- during the making the following video. Like, uh, you know. I only got two hands. And, you know, had to handle multiple controllers. And plus there was some visual static between the [[DVD]] burner, and the uh, television. But at least the final result ended clean. Alright, so, anyway, enjoy the fin-- enjoy this because you know, it's about as-- it's about good as the-- as drawing the [[comic]]. Drawing the comic pages.

Let's see that copycat one-at this-- one-up ''this'' one! Hm! [''[[glasses]] removal''] Love you Kacey. I'm thinking of you.

[''Sudden extreme closeup as Ian kisses the camera'']

==Gameplay video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler Gameplay
| image = {{#ev:youtube|hAOp-Rjx4uw}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 3 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| Other = [[Image:Directfeed.png]] Machinima
| previous = [[Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler#Preface video|Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler Preface]]
| next = [[51 50]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
0:00 - A Sackboy with an orange moptop and [[glasses]] appears. Presumably this is meant to represent Ian. The interior of Ian's LBP Pod (a sort of home base in the game) is adorned with [[Sonichu]] pics shoddily taken with Ian's Playstation Eye.

0:17 - After 17 seconds of fuck-all happening, Ian eventually opens the level he designed for Kacey. Its description reads "Hey Kacey. Instead of a comic, I thought I'd do better with a Level in LittleBIGPlanet. Enjoy."

0:43 - Ian gets stuck for a good 8 seconds in his own hideous level. Finally, he enters a house.

0:47 - Sudden jump-cut out of "Play" mode to "Edit" mode, since Ian's level is too broken to get through the whole thing accurately.

0:50 - Ian activates a speech bubble; the 'voice' that plays sounds appropriately fat and stupid. Speech bubble reads: "Chris! Let Kacey Be! She has left you and come to me; She is Mine. Come, my Love!"

0:55 - We see Ian's Sackboy meant to represent Liquid, which is just the Ian Sackboy with brown hair. The Kacey Sackgirl can be seen as well. [[Liquid]] responds, the voice that plays laughing maniacally "No! I WILL Have Her! Alive! I'm coming after You, Christian!"

1:00 - Kacey Sackgirl responds, "Christian, Help Me!" The voice that plays seems unconcerned, though the sackgirl does have the "sad" emote activated.

1:22 - 20 seconds of awkward shuffling as Solid tries to control both his and Liquid's Sackboy. As there are three Sack-people on the screen, it can be inferred that Ian owns at least 3 [[PS3]] controllers, despite the fact that he has no one to play with. Solid's Sackboy finds a paintgun and uses it to fire on Liquid.

1:47 - Solid and Kacey abscond in a van. Since Solid didn't turn off Liquid's controller, the camera zooms out considerably to compensate for the Sackboy left behind.

2:06 - Sudden jump cut as Solid turns off Liquid's controller, as he and Kacey enter a house virtually identical to the one they just left.

2:16 - Solid meets Kacey's family, who are represented by cutoust instead of actual sackpeople. Kacey's brother says, "Yo, Christian. Thank you for rescuing my sister from that crazy sumbitch."

2:22 - Kacey's father chimes in, "Yes, my boy, you have done a great service. I salute you, good sir."

2:25 - Kacey's mother says, "I would have had my guys at work hunt that by down to get Kacey back. Thank You, Christian."

2:27 - The last family member, her little sister, outright lies, "Wow, Kacey, you can sure pick out a hot man! In comparison, that other guy was a twerp."

2:30 - Kacey (who is still using the "sad" emote from earlier) laments, "Come on, Christian, my dad said it's cool to hange with me in my room."

2:45 - After struggling to maneuver both sackpeople to the bedroom, Solid's Sackboy hops on Kacey's bed and speaks, "I'll take you out for a fun date tomorrow, Kacey." Unlike other parts of the level, the "speaking mouth" tool from the game that produces text balloons isn't hidden, and is instead glued to the bottom of the bed, making it look like the bed itself is talking.

2:49 - The lights dim as Kacey joins Solid in bed.

2:53 - Kacey responds while laughing, "Awesome." Yes, with a sarcastic looking period.

2:57 - Jump Cut to Ian and Kacey in Ian's pod. Apparently Ian couldn't figure out how to add the date as part of the previous level.

2:59 - Solid chooses the level "A First Fun Date". The description reads, "This is a fun level, most suitable for (Straight) Couples. Although there IS a a route for the single without a date. Happy Valentines Day, 2009, from Christian Weston Chandler. ;)"

3:15 - Kacey dances for about 16 seconds while the level loads.

3:41 - Ian struggles to navigate the sackpeople out of the house at the beginning.

3:47 - The lighting suddenly turns dark and ominous as the two exit the building.

4:10 - Ian wastes 23 seconds getting both characters up a slide, having obvious difficulty the whole time.

4:13 - They enter a playground.

4:28 - Ian tries to push Kacey in a swing, but struggles too much with controlling both characters and she falls out.

4:52 - They finally get out of the playground, approaching a roller coaster. A sign is the background is basically illegible at this resolution combined with the ominous lighting.

5:14 - Perhaps knowing he will attempt to touch her inappropriately, Kacey opts for a separate car, and the rocket-powered roller coaster takes off .

5:27 - After a short ride that is far too complex for Ian to have produced it himself (as evidence by the fact that not all the parts of it match up, since he had to compensate for the original pieces' design in comparison to what he was trying to create), the pair finish their roller coaster ride.

5:39 - Taking almost as much time to get off as the actual ride lasted, Ian and Kacey enter a room adorned with a big heart.

6:06 - They just stand there for a while. The room is revealed to be an elevator, and it lowers them to ground level.

6:11 - They approach a sign that seems to say "Little Petit Cafe"

6:15 - A skeletal waiter (actually a Butler from the story mode) greets Ian and Kacey, "Ah, Moseiur, Chandler! We have the table ready for you and your Lovely Woman. Right this way." Just as a reminder, this level was originally made for Valentine's day 2009, when Ian was obviously all alone.

6:27 - Ian and Kacey approach a table, where a large, homophobic candle appears to begin talking to them, "Sit, Converse, Eat. Enjoy each other's company, you (Straight) Lovebirds."

6:34 - A nearby patron says, "Single? Pull a lever behind table."

6:43 - Ian and Kacey hop onto the chairs, which have large buttons on them, activating a switch.

6:57 - Nothing appears to happen. The Kacey sackperson hops across the table to join Ian, and manages to burn her ass on the homophobic candle on the way.

7:05 - Ian and Kacey leave the restaurant, with their wanton button-pressing dissolving the back wall. The lights dim, with stars hanging in the sky.

7:26 - After walking down a long, largely featureless pathway, Ian and Kacey approach a facsimile of the house from earlier.

8:02 - Again, Ian struggles to navigate through the house that he himself built. Exasperated of the man-child's antics, the Kacey Sackgirl sits down and waits impatiently for him to figure out how to work a flight of stairs.

8:08 - Ian finally gets to the second story, but it's a three story house.

8:24 - After getting his own Sackboy through the maze of the house, it's finally Kacey's turn to brave the labyrinth.

8:31 - Even when controlled by Ian directly, Kacey remains much more capable, easily navigating Ian's made geometry.

8:43 - Level Complete!

8:49 - Kacey stomps Ian in the points race, capturing 90% of the level's points for herself. A crowd cheers and confetti bursts as Ian stands with a stupid grin.

9:02 - For whatever reason, Ian doesn't just cut out the video there.

9:19 - Ian navigates both sackpeople until they're standing next to each other. He turns their heads to look at each other, but Sack-Ian immediately just stares at Kacey's tits.

9:27 - After 8 more seconds of awkward silence, the video just ends.

==See also==
*[[CWC is Angry|Another gunman video]]
* [[Sonichu Special 4]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Apology for 9/11 Joke]]|nextlink=[[11042009 51 50|51 50]]|}}
{{Template:Game Videos}}
{{Template:Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
[[Category: Video Games]]

11042009 51 50

2010-01-07T02:14:26Z

Joson: /* Remix */

"'''11042009 51 50'''" is a 5 [[November 2009]] video in Chris claims to do 51 curls of two 50 pound [[honor roll|(by his estimate)]] boxes of soda while wearing a ''[[PaRappa the Rapper]]'' shirt. A 12-pack of soda weighs [http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_much_does_a_12-pack_of_canned_soda_weigh 10 1/2 lbs.], which means Chris was highballing his weight estimate just a tad.

Chris uses improvised dumbells to display [[I AM STRONG|his strength]] once more. Any intelligent person could buy a decent set of weights for $20 or less (which might not be such a good idea for Chris, since he'd probably injure himself actually trying to lift fifty pounds), but Chris isn't about to waste his [[monthly tugboat]] on something that could actually improve his life in any real way. It should be noted that his technique is horrible and lacking a full range of muscle movement, taking away most of the strain from the arms and [[Fail|rendering the exercise useless]]. Yet, around half way into the video, the [[Obesity|profuse sweating]] still manages to make a return in a big way. Of course, in typical Chris fashion one of his can packs breaks falling onto his lap, followed by the cans falling out the pack onto the floor.

Incidentally, "5150" usually refers to an [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5150_(Involuntary_psychiatric_hold) involuntary psychiatric hold] in the State of California.

== Video ==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = 11042009 51 50
| image = {{#ev:youtube|hladtYan5x0}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 5 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| previous = [[Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler]]
| next = [[No More Jokes]]
}}</center>

=== Transcript ===

[''Video seems to start in mid-sentence, Chris is holding a 12-pack of Minute Maid lemonade cans on his knee'']...12-pack. [''knocks on carton''] All the cans are in there. [''Turns the carton so he can read the content information''] 4.26 litres total. Estimated weight [''hefts box with his right hand, needing his left hand to support it as he does so''] unngh, I'd say [[Fail|over 50 pounds]] a thing.

[''Fumbles with the carton as he switches it to his left hand and holds it to his side, then uses his right hand to grab a second 12-pack of lemonade''] So now, watch this, aight?

[''Begins doing curls with the two 12-packs, counting reps for each arm aloud.'']

'''''Reps 1 through 3:''' Chris's posture is slouched forward as he lifts the cartons to shoulder height. He sways a bit from side to side with each rep.''

'''''Reps 4 through 6:''' Chris is already having difficulty lifting the cartons. He starts straining his eyes and his head rocks from side to side more.''

'''''Reps 7 and 8:''' Chris suddenly winces and arches backward as he lifts rep 7, his terrible posture giving him obvious pain. He grimaces through these reps.''

'''''Reps 9 through 11:''' He relaxes here, but he starts rocking his torso back and forth with the reps, as his arms alone are not able to pull the weight unassisted.''

'''''Reps 12 and 13:''' His swaying torso is no longer enough for these massive weights, so he starts kicking his legs a bit to help out.''

'''''Reps 14 through 17:''' Chris stops kicking his legs, but continues to rock back and forth.''

'''''Rep 18:''' Miscounts number 18 for his right arm as 19, but catches his mistake by counting his left arm as 19 twice.''

'''''Reps 20 through 31:''' Still rocking side to side and back and forth as he lifts, occasionally using his legs for assistance.''

'''''Reps 31 through 35:''' Chris's torso movement is now much more pronounced, flopping in all directions. Though his voice remains steady, his contorted face says he really hopes this will end soon.''

'''''Rep 36:''' He twists the carton in his right hand as he brings it up instead of keeping it straight, compromising the carton's structural integrity.''

'''''Rep 37:''' The inevitable happens. Chris twists the right side carton again as he lifts it and this time the carton rips and falls to his lap. He turns the box around and grips it by the other side of the hole he had been gripping it by.''

'''''Reps 38 through 44:''' Rep 38 goes smoother as he had a chance to rest while fumbling with the broken carton, but starting with rep 39, Chris is absolutely straining to bring the right side carton up to his shoulder. He twists his neck to his left each time he does so and scrunches his face tightly.''

''On 40, two cans fall out of the damaged box. He puts them back in and then starts on 41 for his right arm forgetting to do rep 40 for his left.''

'''''Reps 45 through 49:''' On 45, Chris twists his entire body to the left to bring the right-side carton up. This flies in the face of pretty much anyone's estimate of [[mass debating|which of his arms would be stronger]]. His following reps are a bit more relaxed, but he's still struggling mightily, especially with the right-side carton.''

'''''Rep 49:''' Another can falls out of the damaged box. Chris catches it on his lap and puts it back in the box.''

And that's not me. I am unstoppable.

'''''Rep 50:''' Chris resumes where he left off, reaching 50, which he pronounces to be "The Big Five-Oh".''

And to get around in the business sense, [''Lifts his right box high over his head''] fifty-one! [''Repeats action with his left''] And fifty...'''ONE!''' [''Sticks tongue out obscenely.''] Whaaaa! [''Places boxes on the ground''] What a workout!

[''Chris's face is completely drenched with sweat, he flashes a double thumbs-up, then flexes.''] I'm Str... '''NNNNGH'''! [''Approaches camera''] So ther- [''Video ends mid-word.'']

==Remix==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 11042009 51 50 - GAY
| video = {{#ev:youtube|dKSJ0V0Oj3Y }}
| Stardate = 5 November 2009
| Maker = AnimuAnimalia
| Subject = [[11042009 51 50]]
| Video Type = Remix
}}

==See also==
*[[30 Push-Ups]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler]]|nextlink=[[No More Jokes]]|}}
{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

11042009 51 50

2010-01-07T02:11:41Z

Joson:

"'''11042009 51 50'''" is a 5 [[November 2009]] video in Chris claims to do 51 curls of two 50 pound [[honor roll|(by his estimate)]] boxes of soda while wearing a ''[[PaRappa the Rapper]]'' shirt. A 12-pack of soda weighs [http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_much_does_a_12-pack_of_canned_soda_weigh 10 1/2 lbs.], which means Chris was highballing his weight estimate just a tad.

Chris uses improvised dumbells to display [[I AM STRONG|his strength]] once more. Any intelligent person could buy a decent set of weights for $20 or less (which might not be such a good idea for Chris, since he'd probably injure himself actually trying to lift fifty pounds), but Chris isn't about to waste his [[monthly tugboat]] on something that could actually improve his life in any real way. It should be noted that his technique is horrible and lacking a full range of muscle movement, taking away most of the strain from the arms and [[Fail|rendering the exercise useless]]. Yet, around half way into the video, the [[Obesity|profuse sweating]] still manages to make a return in a big way. Of course, in typical Chris fashion one of his can packs breaks falling onto his lap, followed by the cans falling out the pack onto the floor.

Incidentally, "5150" usually refers to an [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5150_(Involuntary_psychiatric_hold) involuntary psychiatric hold] in the State of California.

== Video ==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = 11042009 51 50
| image = {{#ev:youtube|hladtYan5x0}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 5 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| previous = [[Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler]]
| next = [[No More Jokes]]
}}</center>

=== Transcript ===

[''Video seems to start in mid-sentence, Chris is holding a 12-pack of Minute Maid lemonade cans on his knee'']...12-pack. [''knocks on carton''] All the cans are in there. [''Turns the carton so he can read the content information''] 4.26 litres total. Estimated weight [''hefts box with his right hand, needing his left hand to support it as he does so''] unngh, I'd say [[Fail|over 50 pounds]] a thing.

[''Fumbles with the carton as he switches it to his left hand and holds it to his side, then uses his right hand to grab a second 12-pack of lemonade''] So now, watch this, aight?

[''Begins doing curls with the two 12-packs, counting reps for each arm aloud.'']

'''''Reps 1 through 3:''' Chris's posture is slouched forward as he lifts the cartons to shoulder height. He sways a bit from side to side with each rep.''

'''''Reps 4 through 6:''' Chris is already having difficulty lifting the cartons. He starts straining his eyes and his head rocks from side to side more.''

'''''Reps 7 and 8:''' Chris suddenly winces and arches backward as he lifts rep 7, his terrible posture giving him obvious pain. He grimaces through these reps.''

'''''Reps 9 through 11:''' He relaxes here, but he starts rocking his torso back and forth with the reps, as his arms alone are not able to pull the weight unassisted.''

'''''Reps 12 and 13:''' His swaying torso is no longer enough for these massive weights, so he starts kicking his legs a bit to help out.''

'''''Reps 14 through 17:''' Chris stops kicking his legs, but continues to rock back and forth.''

'''''Rep 18:''' Miscounts number 18 for his right arm as 19, but catches his mistake by counting his left arm as 19 twice.''

'''''Reps 20 through 31:''' Still rocking side to side and back and forth as he lifts, occasionally using his legs for assistance.''

'''''Reps 31 through 35:''' Chris's torso movement is now much more pronounced, flopping in all directions. Though his voice remains steady, his contorted face says he really hopes this will end soon.''

'''''Rep 36:''' He twists the carton in his right hand as he brings it up instead of keeping it straight, compromising the carton's structural integrity.''

'''''Rep 37:''' The inevitable happens. Chris twists the right side carton again as he lifts it and this time the carton rips and falls to his lap. He turns the box around and grips it by the other side of the hole he had been gripping it by.''

'''''Reps 38 through 44:''' Rep 38 goes smoother as he had a chance to rest while fumbling with the broken carton, but starting with rep 39, Chris is absolutely straining to bring the right side carton up to his shoulder. He twists his neck to his left each time he does so and scrunches his face tightly.''

''On 40, two cans fall out of the damaged box. He puts them back in and then starts on 41 for his right arm forgetting to do rep 40 for his left.''

'''''Reps 45 through 49:''' On 45, Chris twists his entire body to the left to bring the right-side carton up. This flies in the face of pretty much anyone's estimate of [[mass debating|which of his arms would be stronger]]. His following reps are a bit more relaxed, but he's still struggling mightily, especially with the right-side carton.''

'''''Rep 49:''' Another can falls out of the damaged box. Chris catches it on his lap and puts it back in the box.''

And that's not me. I am unstoppable.

'''''Rep 50:''' Chris resumes where he left off, reaching 50, which he pronounces to be "The Big Five-Oh".''

And to get around in the business sense, [''Lifts his right box high over his head''] fifty-one! [''Repeats action with his left''] And fifty...'''ONE!''' [''Sticks tongue out obscenely.''] Whaaaa! [''Places boxes on the ground''] What a workout!

[''Chris's face is completely drenched with sweat, he flashes a double thumbs-up, then flexes.''] I'm Str... '''NNNNGH'''! [''Approaches camera''] So ther- [''Video ends mid-word.'']

==Remix==

<center>{{#ev:youtube|dKSJ0V0Oj3Y }}</center>

==See also==
*[[30 Push-Ups]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler]]|nextlink=[[No More Jokes]]|}}
{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Red Letter CWC Certified Day

2010-01-07T02:08:40Z

Joson:

[[Image:SonichuCertificate.jpg|thumb|TRUE and ORIGINAL copyright of a [[Lie|TRUE and ORIGINAL]] character]]

'''11122009 Red Letter CWC Certified Day''' is a video uploaded on 12 [[November 2009]] in which [[Chris]] proudly displays the certificate of his registration of the name, "[[Sonichu]]", which he received in the mail earlier that day. He is extremely jubilant and smug in this video, in stark contrast to 11 November's [[CWC is Sad]] in which he (''supposedly'') wept over the loss of [[Kacey]]. This is Chris's first [[Captain's Log]] since mid [[October 2009|October]].

Despite him having registered [[Sonichu]], it still stands that if he tries to publish anything ''Sonichu''-related, he will be in trouble. The comics themselves contain content that is already copyrighted, and the abortion that is Sonichu would be EXTREMELY hard to defend in a court of law, due to being confusingly similar to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]].

Nevertheless, Chris waves the certificate as proof that he is the [[CChanSonichuCWC|TRUE and HONEST CWC]]. The resilience of his ego remains astonishing. Even after the sustained stress inflicted by the drama with Kacey and Liquid Chris, one piece of paper is all it takes to confirm that he is right, the trolls are wrong, and he is back on his way to a successful career as a comic artist/game designer/genius auteur. This proves that Chris<s>'s spirit is indomitable or that he</s> cared so little about Kacey that the loss of their relationship meant nothing to him.

Also notable is that the [[Medallion of Fail]] has made its less-than-triumphant return, suggesting that a number of the previous videos were not TRUE and HONEST. (It's more likely, however, that Chris simply forgot about the medallion rule during that period of time.)

The video features another demonstration of Chris's ignorance of the national anthem. He appears to be attempting a bastard hybrid of "Hail to the Chief" and "My Country, 'Tis of Thee", but, whatever it is, it bears [[Fail|no resemblance whatsoever]] to "The Star-Spangled Banner." His complete ignorance of American patriotic songs was [[Apology for 9/11 Joke|heard before in this video]].

'''SPOILER:''' Registering a fan character won't get you [[china]]

== Video ==
{{quote|IT IS OFFICIAL, Y'ALL! So, you Damn, Dirty Trolls Can Suck Your Own "IT"! (:D}}
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Red Letter CWC Certified Day
| image = {{#ev:youtube|yJl4KhoLLZc}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 12 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| previous = [[CWC is sad]]
| next = [[14 November 2009]]
}}</center>

=== Transcript ===
[''Chris is in a perky mood. He is once again sporting his [[medallion]] and [[pedo-glasses]].]

Ah, [[Captain's Log]], Stardate November 12, 2009. It's now time for fan mail—well, not much fan mail, as it is, but a little something from the Virginia Library of Congress!

[''He holds an envelope up to the camera, with a return address from the United States Copyright Office.]

Let's take a look inside, shall we?

[''The camera wobbles wildly as Chris fumbles with the envelope. His pair of [[Plush Breasts]] is briefly visible.'']

Hm, whaddaya know? [''Removing glasses''] All the [[trolls]] have been lying after all! They have no registration.

[''He holds the "Certificate of Registration" up to the camera.'']

Read it and weep! Hm. But anyway, the signature, the seal, and a registration number...and the titles, and everything, this will be scanned and uploaded to the [[CWCipedia]] today! So, ha! Middle finger to you, you damn trolling bastards!

[''He flips the bird at the camera.'']
[[Image:Ianfuckfail.jpg|thumb|How does one fail at showing the middle finger?]]
You can die and rot in hell, [[Clyde]]! You too, [[CChanSonichuCWC|Chris]]. Sorry, Kacey, but...that son of a bitch [[Lie|ain't got nothin' now]]. Oh, also, something else, you know?

[''He waves the letter around in front of the camera some more.'']

Front... and back! Information!

[''He points his index finger at...something.'']

So there! I am a true, I am the true, I am the man! I am the real creator! I am...Christian Weston Chandler, first name Christopher, Spanish nickname Ricardo, of [[Ruckersville, Virginia]]. In the United States of America.

[''He performs a half-assed Cub Scout salute and begins singing, very badly.'']

"Hail thee, to the president, by gah-[''presumably trying to figure the word while saying it; video skips'']her 'tis of thee..." Okay, I don't know the words, but I am being patriotic here!

So everybody have a good day. And more stuff is to come, so keep it [''video skips''] and praying and that you will get it. Have a great day.

==See also==
*[[Chris and copyright]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC is sad]]|nextlink=[[14 November 2009]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

14 November 2009

2010-01-07T02:04:27Z

Joson: /* Video */

In "'''14 November 2009'''" (officially "'''11142009'''"), Chris announces that he has fulfilled his promise to upload a <s>text wall</s> [[Sonichu]] [[comic]] to [[CWCipedia]], denies that he has any ads on Craigslist, demands to be put in contact with the people who run Craigslist, and claims he has someone on the inside who knows [[Clyde Cash]]'s personal information.

His remarks concerning Craigslist may have been inspired by an ad posted to the Charlottesville Craigslist site, claiming that a huge collection of video games, electronics, and other items was being liquidated at [[14 Branchland Court]]. The ad did not include an e-mail address or phone number, but advised would-be buyers to simply drive up and make a deal. Whether anyone actually came by Chris's house to try and relieve him of his possessions isn't clear. The ad was quickly flagged and deleted from the site.

Once again, Chris's [[Sex toys|pair of fake tits]] makes a conspicuous appearance, this time in the lower left corner of the shot.

'''Official description:''' [none]

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = 14 November 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|HOFWnLCx0us}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 14 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga
| previous = [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day]]
| next = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''Chris stands a medium distance from the camera, wearing his [[medallion]] and displaying the [[Amnyfest Ring]]'']

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: November 14th, 2009.

Alright, well just a couple things—just a couple quickie things to update about. I will hold true to my promise, and dr—and, uh, upload it—upload a page at least—more if I feel like it in a day—on a daily basis on [[CWCipedia]], starting today. The, uhh, pit—the current page for today will have been uploaded by time this video is up and onto the CWCi—onto the CWCipedia.

And, uhh, let's see... secondly, there—I—I currently and have not had, any ads on ''Craiglist'', se—for selling anything, or honoring anything, at the time. So... anybody who sees such ads that, uhh, pertain to, uhh, my home address, my home phone number, my or my mother and my father's names, please flag it as... spam... or... something-like-that, 'cuz it's fake-at-the-time. Unless I say s—unless I say it's specifisly—specifically say it's legit, on the CWCipedia or here on this [[YouTube]] account, do not believe it. And, also, my father—I would like the, uhh, phone number for, uhh, to get in contact with the people behind Craigslist, so that we can straighten-out that mess and prevent... frauds.

And, also, final—on the final note, [[Clyde Cash]], I'm getting your information! I'm coming after you, man. I'm getting your information. I have... a person on the inside. So you bes—so, you best fal—you just fall back. Get off the Internet. Stay off the Internet. ''Son [of] a bitch!''

[''he flips the bird at the camera'']

And, uhh, just a reminder [''curls his fingers into the [[Claw of Fail]]'']: I hold name [[copyright]]—[[Lies|''legitimate''!]]—just as I have said in my recent video. And p—and the paperwork's on the CWCipedia, ''with the envelope'', from the Virginia Library of Congress.

So, anyhow, I'll leave that with everyone—err, that with y'all, and y'all have a safe and pleasant day. Thank you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Red Letter CWC Certified Day]]|nextlink=[[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation

2010-01-06T05:53:47Z

Joson:

The '''CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation''' is a set of videos that [[Chris]] is releasing in order to sell the [[Sonichu]] franchise to others.

Chris imagines that he is speaking directly to "businesspeople" who might invest in the commercial development of Sonichu. In the first video, he delivers a brief history of Sonichu's creation, and also displays a few Sonichu-related creations beyond his comics and his famous medallion, including crude clay sculptures of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] and a "[[Sonic]] versus Sonichu" racing board game. He concludes by claiming that he plans to complete between 50 and 100 Sonichu comics in his lifetime. If he keeps up his current pace, he will have reached the minimum goal in 2029.

The second video is substantially less coherent. Chris loses the plot as far as attempting to sell his character and settles down to narcissistic wallowing in his supposed personal achievements and his fantasies of a vast international Sonichu fandom. He spends several minutes showing off fan art submitted by [[trolls]], all of which is unsurprisingly far better than anything Chris himself could ever dream of drawing. He also seems to have revived his old dreams of a Pokémon video game or trading card expansion starring Sonichu, which suggests he has forgotten the conclusion of the [[Miyamoto Saga]] or managed to actively push those events out of his mind.

Perhaps his most impressively deluded fantasy involves the prospect of a [[Fan:Sonichu: The Animated Series|Sonichu animated series]]. He believes that [[Sony]] would be interested in developing the show, that the [[Adult Swim|Cartoon Network]] would be interested in broadcasting the show, and that he would direct and star as the voice of himself and Sonichu. (He briefly shows off his "Sonichu voice," an almost indistinguishably higher-pitched version of his normal voice.)

As usual, Chris displays a shocking lack of awareness concerning the actual commercial viability of his character. (Hint: it has none.) He also, once again, fails to realize that giving out your home address, home phone number, mobile phone number, and other key bits of personal information in a video that's publicly available on [[YouTube]] is not such a hot idea.

In addition to uploading the videos to YouTube, Chris also made a page for these presentations on the [[CWCipedia]]. He also attempted to upload the follow-up PowerPoint presentation videos, but failed, possibly because either the video files were corrupt or he actually thought .ppt files were video files compatible with YouTube.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 1
| image = {{#ev:youtube|w_XTQhBp3v0}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 23 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Comics.png]] [[Comic]] [[Image:Fanartn.PNG]] [[:Category:Fan art|Fanart]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Classicshirt.png]] Classic
| previous = [[14 November 2009]]
| next = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation#Part 2|CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 2]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
[''The song ''Sonic Boom'' is playing on the PS3 behind Chris, at times loud enough to make Chris hard to understand.''] Mmm. HELLO, w—hello there muh-business people! Welcome to world of [[CWCville]], Virginia, [''Chris fidgets with his [[Medallion of Fail]]''] and the world of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]]. My name is [[Christian Weston Chandler]] of [[Ruckersville, Virginia]], [[14 Branchland Court]], ZIP code 22968. And, uh, my home phone number is (434) 990-0198, my cell phone being 760-0848.

Anyway, I am here today to talk to you about d—revolutionary geh—leviloutionary lil' character that WILL [''jump cut''] pah, uh—will make a lot of [[money]], because he's already been innernet-famous fer about 20—fer almost 10 years now. [''pulls out a [[Scrapbook of Fail|Sonichu binder]] and holds it up to the camera''] His name is Sonichu. The l'il, real electric hedgehog [[Pokémon]] right here. [''points to Sonichu on cover of [[Sonichu 0|Issue 0]], then starts to put away the binder''] You'll find out more about him. You can learn more about him and read [''holds the binder back up to the camera''] the comic books—comic book pages I've written—I've drawn and written so far [[''puts the binder away this time''] on [[CWCipedia]], which, uh, the address to that would be next to this [[YouTube]] video in da details.

Anyway, we are here t—t—anyway yeah. His or—his origin is basically... yeah, first off, uh, we have to c—look at the—my big BOOK here. [''pulls out a different, giant binder''] Look how big that book is. So thick, I had to get ANOTHER BOOK. [''hefts a second equally huge binder''] Heh. [''sets second binder down'']

Anyway, [''sets giant binder down and opens it''] it all s—[''video skips''] Anyway, uh... upon the cre—uh, upon the physical—upon the mental creation of Sonichu, it originally came to me, because, for one—for a computer graphics class back in high school, I had to create a CD cover for... [''wipes his forehead with his sleeve''] a CD that's, uh, was not to be sold anywhere, but, anyway. Made for fun, but—so, I drew up a...—a—this—this CD cover right here [''holds up a binder page showing [[Christian's Favorite Hits!]]''] and this—this—this was Sonichu's first a—forst official appearance. Front and back on the ins—on the insert. If, anyway, uh, basically, [''video skips''] the—uh, the idea came to me, like, you know, yeah, I wanted to use Sonic the Hedgehog and Pikachu on the cover of my CD, but they're both copyrighted characters, and previously-copyrighted characters were not allowed. So, uh, after lunch, uh, during that same day, in da [[Manchester High School]] with my teacher Miss Naelie Chalifoux, thank'a very much, I have...—it just dawned upon me, with, uh, merging together, in combination of the two, and then Sonichu was born.

Now that and then [[homos|in da but]] storywise, he was born—he—he was born amidst the, uh, s—sitcha—situation in Station Square whereas portray—previous portrayed in the ''Sonic Adventure'' game, available on Dreamcast and Nintendo GameCube. Ay—yeah, but during the battle, the Chaos Monster, Super Sonic, ran into a spystanding Pikachu and, uh, transformed in—into Sonichu... as that was also—as the origins also described in the ''Number Zero'' book on the—on the CWCipedia.

[''reaches for glasses, then reconsiders and wipes his forehead with his arm'']

Now, the, uhh...—now, Sonichu's appeal—Sonichu and Rosechu's appeal: yeah, mainly, the, uhh, appeal was... t—aimed towards children... and, uhh, there was the start of the books, there. We got little toys here, I put togetter. Even a—even a board game, where we put the boards... right here. Sonic vs. Sonichu, a little racing-type game, but it's a l'il—it's a little bit Monopoly-style, with game ca—with, uhh, cards that you pick up... uhn, and shortcuts. Anyway, that is, uhh, part of the, uhh, merchandising thing that I plan on branching out with... in the world of Sonichu, eventually. As, uhh, p—as portrayed—as previously-mentioned in a YouTube video, I have the official registration copyright of Sonichu... and Rosechu and the C-uh-CWCville, in my—in my own name, and that—and that is also accessible on the CWCipedia: the scan of that... actual piece of paper that came from the Virginia Library of Congress.

[''opens binder and sighs'']

Anyway, yeah, I got a ''whole'' bunch of history here. All my history. It comes, like, you know, from creation... with, uhh...—to making, uhh, to a whole bunch of stories, and from, uhh...—and even, uhh, made a title(?)... for it in my [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]], which was, uhh—which I believe I told Nintendo of America about... in a previous letter or two. Anyway, yeah, it was—it was very—it was very lucrative, and... we do play(?) a buncha—even on DVD, of, like, on my live DVD that's called [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|''CWC... Christian Weston Chandler... That's Me. Yep, I'm on TV!'']] Uhh, C-''Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm on TV!'' That's the name of the DVD. So, if it comes out on DVD, I hope to get it on... Blu-ray, as well. And, also, I've created the, uhh—a couple of Sonich—a, uhh, level S—for Sonichu, on ''[[Little Big Planet]]'', Sony—on Sony [[PlayStation 3]]... which, uhh, is called "Sonichu Episode 0". You can look it up; my [[PSN]] ID is ''Sonichu'': S-o-n-i-c-h-u. ...Anyway, e—e—following this, uhh, video... there will be a... video where, uhh... it will be presented live from my PC: a PowerPoint presentation that can better describe... the situation. Anyway, with the count of books, I plan—I plan on drawing, at least, in my lifetime, hopefully, between fifty to a hundred books.

==Part 2==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 2
| image = {{#ev:youtube|VorW1ExsuAM}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 23 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Comics.png]] [[Comic]] [[Image:Fanartn.PNG]] [[:Category:Fan art|Fanart]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Classicshirt.png]] Classic
| previous = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation#Video|CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 1]]
| next = [[Sonichu Powerpoint]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
[''Picking up where the first video left off.'']

By which, uh, definitely more will be a re—a ra—around Sonichu, after I, which I have dubbed myself the [[CWCville|Mayor of CWCville]], in this glorious shopping, this glorious two-story shopping mall, ah, that is glorious. I actually have, uh, plans that I have, uh, made in Computer Aided Drafting and Design, which I will present through this video, near the end of it—near the end of this video.

[''He begins flipping through a thick three-ring binder.'']

Anyway, yeah, got a whooole bunch of stuff here. Yeah, we can definitely franchise 'n' all this, you know. Even ideas of a ''Pokémon: Lightning Version'', where players can catch Sonichu and Rosechu in the wild, even breeding them to make the other individual electric hedgehog characters that are—have been portrayed in the book, such as Wild, Bubbles, Angelica, Punchy, and Magi-Chan, among others that have also been created as well, due—due—due to, you know, processes of the evolution stones, and daytime/nighttime evolutions, friendship, all that good stuff. All in the—the files here, including their little baby forms Sonee and Rosee, to evolutions from original Sonichu and Rosechu....

[''He displays the Sonichu and Rosechu figures again.'']

...Metonic and Vamprosa. Those characters are also featured on the CWCipedia. At least on Sonichu's page; I'm planning on making a page for Rosechu herself on that note. But, anyway, This—this—this Sonichu franchise, it has a biiig number of fans. I even have a number of fan submissions. Like, this here is a draw—is a piece of fan art that came from a girl I knew in Australia.
[[Image:SonichuCover10.jpg|thumb|right|PandaHalo's fanart, which serves as the cover of [[Sonichu 10]].]]
[''He holds up the picture, presumably from [[PandaHalo]], to the camera.'']

And that's a postcard sent from her, right there. She, uh, also, uh, created a Sonichu and Rosechu that's featured in the ''Number Nine'' book I'm currently drawing. They go by the name of [[Chloe]] and [[BlazeBob Sonichu|BlazeBob]].

[''Chris turns around the file revealing another piece of art.'']

Anyway, also, on the flip side of this page is from somebody else. It's possibly the best Sonichu fan art ever. Look at that. That's gonna be the cover of the, uh, the first book that's just based on Sonichu, which'll definitely be after ''Number Ten''...

[''He turns around the picture to display Panda's image.'']

...which this one will be the cover of.

[''He looks at the other image again.'']

Hm. This one came from, uh, "Zorah Q. Zowild," that's his YouTube name. Yeah, also, you know, I've received fan art in the snail mail, those are printed off the internet. Like this lovely one.
[[Image:AllisonSonichuRosechu.jpg|thumb|And from that, you know, that's, you know, she could have done a little better like, you know, like Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her]]
[''He holds up a drawing of Sonichu and Rosechu in formal wear.'']

That came from, uh, that came from a lovely woman named Allie, in Sun Valley, California. Thank you. Thank you very much. And from that, you know, that's, you know, she could have done a little better like, you know, like Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her. But, still, drew my own version of it.

[''He holds up a crude imitation of the previous drawing.'']
[[Image:CWCsEloquateSonichuandRosechu.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's "superior" version of Allie's drawing.]]
Heh, heh. Isn't that fun? Oh, of course, local art, in Charlottesville, an art—an artist did a caricature of me.

[''He turns around the file to display the caricature.'']

I included that in the ''Number Nine'' book on a billboard.

[''He holds up one more piece of art.'']

Here's another fun piece of fan art. It comes from, uh... B.C. Uh, okay, I can't, uh, Vancouver, B.C. Yeah. Anyway, yeah. [[Chris_and_reality|Very famous. Very, very famous.]] Yep. Uh, this one's just a fan letter from a... from a [[BlueSpike|Julie in Ohio]].

[''He holds up an image, but the high contrast of his video renders it impossible to make out.'']

Here's a little piece of fan art from a, uh, from someone who's possibly, uh, Japanese. Who lives in Virginia. And also, recently, this guy here, uh, Jason Darling...thank you very much; I got your package.

[''He holds up a folder of photographs.'']

He made a replica of my [[medallion]], which in them, which, you know, this one here is the original that I made myself from my own hands, from Crayola Model Magic and acrylic paints. In the comic books this allows me to transform into Chris-chan Sonichu. Which, that is described in the comic book pages as reposed in the CWCipedia. Also sent me a pack of Maple Story cards, so again, thank you Jason. I appreciate your encouragement, as well as everybody else's. Anyway, uh... hmm... yeah, I picked up a—also received a fan CD from a—from a, uhh... BK Jones in Texas. Oh, here's anutter—here's anutter fun one that's recent. Look at this envelope. Isn't that... cute? That's fun. And then they did a computer art... over there. This came all the way from... Portland... Oregon, I believe it is. And, uhh, I got various other... fan letters in—in this page. Uhh, I'd pull 'em out, but, you know, they're in—I just left them in their envelopes. Nope, fan art dere.

But, anyway, also, aside from that, uhh... I have definitely—I have definitely made a set of trading—'kay, this is my [[The Wall of Originals|homemade Pokémon trading cards]]... which I, uhh, used—which I keep at home for art's sake. A whole heck—got, like—whole—a ''whole lot'' of them here. This could definitely branch out.... And a very ''profitable'' thing, both for between Nintendo and Sega, and also with Son—also possibly with Sony, with, uhh—you know, with the a—also with, uhh, the anime show that maybe—maybe Cartoon Network and their people could help me out on... eh, when tha—when that TV show gets run. Where I'll voic—where I will be happy to—where I will be the ''director'', and I will be voicing myself as Sonichu. Listen to the difference: okay, this is me, Christian Weston Chandler, and this will be Sonichu: [''clearly taking after [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEIpeZFUnJE George] by not changing his voice whatsoever''] Hey, Rosechu! Let's go out and zap to the extreme! We got some bad guys to defeat! Come on, let's go! Yeah!

[''quietly musing over his own amazing degree of fail''] Hmm... odd, but... [''recovered from the shock, back at normal volume''] anyway, uhh, running low on time. Uhh, just a couple of, uhh, other things of interest: uhh, Sonichu was also previously featured in May, 2004, in this issue of ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine, in "The Crossing Quarterly"... with a, uhh, submission from my ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' game—for Nintendo GameCube, currently also available in—in other titles on DS and Nintendo Wii. And, also, uhh—and, shortly after that, it was featured... in a newsletter at the Piedmont Virgi—at the local [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]... among, uhh, other... published things. Also, uhh, when the, uhh, Sonic website was owiginawwy—was just CWCSonichu site, I had my own [[Sonichu's News Dash|News Dash newsletters]]. That lasted a short while.... Hmm. Actually, uh, yeah, but any—yeah, but, anyway, everybody knows on the CWCipedia, so....

[''sigh'']

Anyway, here: I'll show you the, uhh, just the, uhh, whole layout of the CWCville Shopping Center. I actually have all these... printouts from... my... [[CADD|Computer-Aided Drafting and cla—cla—Computer-Aided Drafting and Design classes]], but this is the last one, right before I graduated from Piedmont Virginia College. Then my degree and certificate in Commu—Computer-Aided Drafting and Design. It's very—it's very good. I mean, I would just imagine this in real life. It would even have a Pokémon Center in there, like the one in New York used to have, before it turned into a Nintendo World, USA. It shoulda stayed a ''Pokémon Center''! Now, that was definitely better appeal than just... Nintend—than just Nintendo, even though, yes, Nintendo... has the rights and everything, but... it was ''the Pokémon Center''! I mean... le—if the CWC—if the CWCville Shopping Center does get built... let's agree to put a Pokémon Center in it. And it has a Mayor's Office... right here, above the... front of—up above the main front entrance of the building... which is as portrayed in the comic book series. Aaand a whole buncha... other stuff I have, uh, here. It's just side-...stuff from... my... life, and whatever.

Anyway, uhh... uhh, pretty much, uhh, take care of it for, uhh, this par—for this portion of the, uhh, video, [''removes glasses''] so the next video to follow this one will be the... [''taps table''] PowerPoint presentation, so I will be reading audioly—I will be reading from that and pointing the camera toward the PC, [''quietly and unconfidently''] thank you. [''gives a half-assed Cub Scout salute'']

So... to Nintendo and Sega and Sony and all the other companies interested in... franchising with me here: [''gives another half-assed Cub Scout salute''] I await your call to my home phone... number or my cell phone.

Thank you very much, and have a [''gives ANOTHER half-assed [[Chris's mannerisms|Cub Scout salute]]''] ''pleasant day''!
{{CWCipedia|chris=Sonichu Presentations}}
{{clear}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[14 November 2009]]|nextlink=[[Sonichu Powerpoint]]|}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation

2010-01-06T05:48:24Z

Joson:

The '''CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation''' is a set of videos that [[Chris]] is releasing in order to sell the [[Sonichu]] franchise to others.

Chris imagines that he is speaking directly to "businesspeople" who might invest in the commercial development of Sonichu. In the first video, he delivers a brief history of Sonichu's creation, and also displays a few Sonichu-related creations beyond his comics and his famous medallion, including crude clay sculptures of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] and a "[[Sonic]] versus Sonichu" racing board game. He concludes by claiming that he plans to complete between 50 and 100 Sonichu comics in his lifetime. If he keeps up his current pace, he will have reached the minimum goal in 2029.

The second video is substantially less coherent. Chris loses the plot as far as attempting to sell his character and settles down to narcissistic wallowing in his supposed personal achievements and his fantasies of a vast international Sonichu fandom. He spends several minutes showing off fan art submitted by [[trolls]], all of which is unsurprisingly far better than anything Chris himself could ever dream of drawing. He also seems to have revived his old dreams of a Pokémon video game or trading card expansion starring Sonichu, which suggests he has forgotten the conclusion of the [[Miyamoto Saga]] or managed to actively push those events out of his mind.

Perhaps his most impressively deluded fantasy involves the prospect of a [[Fan:Sonichu: The Animated Series|Sonichu animated series]]. He believes that [[Sony]] would be interested in developing the show, that the [[Adult Swim|Cartoon Network]] would be interested in broadcasting the show, and that he would direct and star as the voice of himself and Sonichu. (He briefly shows off his "Sonichu voice," an almost indistinguishably higher-pitched version of his normal voice.)

As usual, Chris displays a shocking lack of awareness concerning the actual commercial viability of his character. (Hint: it has none.) He also, once again, fails to realize that giving out your home address, home phone number, mobile phone number, and other key bits of personal information in a video that's publicly available on [[YouTube]] is not such a hot idea.

In addition to uploading the videos to YouTube, Chris also made a page for these presentations on the [[CWCipedia]]. He also attempted to upload the follow-up PowerPoint presentation videos, but failed, possibly because either the video files were corrupt or he actually thought .ppt files were video files compatible with YouTube.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 1
| image = {{#ev:youtube|w_XTQhBp3v0}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 23 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Comics.png]] [[Comic]] [[Image:Fanartn.png]] [[Fanart]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Classicshirt.png]] Classic
| previous = [[14 November 2009]]
| next = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation#Part 2|CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 2]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
[''The song ''Sonic Boom'' is playing on the PS3 behind Chris, at times loud enough to make Chris hard to understand.''] Mmm. HELLO, w—hello there muh-business people! Welcome to world of [[CWCville]], Virginia, [''Chris fidgets with his [[Medallion of Fail]]''] and the world of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]]. My name is [[Christian Weston Chandler]] of [[Ruckersville, Virginia]], [[14 Branchland Court]], ZIP code 22968. And, uh, my home phone number is (434) 990-0198, my cell phone being 760-0848.

Anyway, I am here today to talk to you about d—revolutionary geh—leviloutionary lil' character that WILL [''jump cut''] pah, uh—will make a lot of [[money]], because he's already been innernet-famous fer about 20—fer almost 10 years now. [''pulls out a [[Scrapbook of Fail|Sonichu binder]] and holds it up to the camera''] His name is Sonichu. The l'il, real electric hedgehog [[Pokémon]] right here. [''points to Sonichu on cover of [[Sonichu 0|Issue 0]], then starts to put away the binder''] You'll find out more about him. You can learn more about him and read [''holds the binder back up to the camera''] the comic books—comic book pages I've written—I've drawn and written so far [[''puts the binder away this time''] on [[CWCipedia]], which, uh, the address to that would be next to this [[YouTube]] video in da details.

Anyway, we are here t—t—anyway yeah. His or—his origin is basically... yeah, first off, uh, we have to c—look at the—my big BOOK here. [''pulls out a different, giant binder''] Look how big that book is. So thick, I had to get ANOTHER BOOK. [''hefts a second equally huge binder''] Heh. [''sets second binder down'']

Anyway, [''sets giant binder down and opens it''] it all s—[''video skips''] Anyway, uh... upon the cre—uh, upon the physical—upon the mental creation of Sonichu, it originally came to me, because, for one—for a computer graphics class back in high school, I had to create a CD cover for... [''wipes his forehead with his sleeve''] a CD that's, uh, was not to be sold anywhere, but, anyway. Made for fun, but—so, I drew up a...—a—this—this CD cover right here [''holds up a binder page showing [[Christian's Favorite Hits!]]''] and this—this—this was Sonichu's first a—forst official appearance. Front and back on the ins—on the insert. If, anyway, uh, basically, [''video skips''] the—uh, the idea came to me, like, you know, yeah, I wanted to use Sonic the Hedgehog and Pikachu on the cover of my CD, but they're both copyrighted characters, and previously-copyrighted characters were not allowed. So, uh, after lunch, uh, during that same day, in da [[Manchester High School]] with my teacher Miss Naelie Chalifoux, thank'a very much, I have...—it just dawned upon me, with, uh, merging together, in combination of the two, and then Sonichu was born.

Now that and then [[homos|in da but]] storywise, he was born—he—he was born amidst the, uh, s—sitcha—situation in Station Square whereas portray—previous portrayed in the ''Sonic Adventure'' game, available on Dreamcast and Nintendo GameCube. Ay—yeah, but during the battle, the Chaos Monster, Super Sonic, ran into a spystanding Pikachu and, uh, transformed in—into Sonichu... as that was also—as the origins also described in the ''Number Zero'' book on the—on the CWCipedia.

[''reaches for glasses, then reconsiders and wipes his forehead with his arm'']

Now, the, uhh...—now, Sonichu's appeal—Sonichu and Rosechu's appeal: yeah, mainly, the, uhh, appeal was... t—aimed towards children... and, uhh, there was the start of the books, there. We got little toys here, I put togetter. Even a—even a board game, where we put the boards... right here. Sonic vs. Sonichu, a little racing-type game, but it's a l'il—it's a little bit Monopoly-style, with game ca—with, uhh, cards that you pick up... uhn, and shortcuts. Anyway, that is, uhh, part of the, uhh, merchandising thing that I plan on branching out with... in the world of Sonichu, eventually. As, uhh, p—as portrayed—as previously-mentioned in a YouTube video, I have the official registration copyright of Sonichu... and Rosechu and the C-uh-CWCville, in my—in my own name, and that—and that is also accessible on the CWCipedia: the scan of that... actual piece of paper that came from the Virginia Library of Congress.

[''opens binder and sighs'']

Anyway, yeah, I got a ''whole'' bunch of history here. All my history. It comes, like, you know, from creation... with, uhh...—to making, uhh, to a whole bunch of stories, and from, uhh...—and even, uhh, made a title(?)... for it in my [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]], which was, uhh—which I believe I told Nintendo of America about... in a previous letter or two. Anyway, yeah, it was—it was very—it was very lucrative, and... we do play(?) a buncha—even on DVD, of, like, on my live DVD that's called [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|''CWC... Christian Weston Chandler... That's Me. Yep, I'm on TV!'']] Uhh, C-''Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm on TV!'' That's the name of the DVD. So, if it comes out on DVD, I hope to get it on... Blu-ray, as well. And, also, I've created the, uhh—a couple of Sonich—a, uhh, level S—for Sonichu, on ''[[Little Big Planet]]'', Sony—on Sony [[PlayStation 3]]... which, uhh, is called "Sonichu Episode 0". You can look it up; my [[PSN]] ID is ''Sonichu'': S-o-n-i-c-h-u. ...Anyway, e—e—following this, uhh, video... there will be a... video where, uhh... it will be presented live from my PC: a PowerPoint presentation that can better describe... the situation. Anyway, with the count of books, I plan—I plan on drawing, at least, in my lifetime, hopefully, between fifty to a hundred books.

==Part 2==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 2
| image = {{#ev:youtube|VorW1ExsuAM}}

| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 23 November 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Comics.png]] [[Comic]] [[Image:Fanartn.png]] [[Fanart]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Classicshirt.png]] Classic
| previous = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation#Video|CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 1]]
| next = [[Sonichu Powerpoint]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
[''Picking up where the first video left off.'']

By which, uh, definitely more will be a re—a ra—around Sonichu, after I, which I have dubbed myself the [[CWCville|Mayor of CWCville]], in this glorious shopping, this glorious two-story shopping mall, ah, that is glorious. I actually have, uh, plans that I have, uh, made in Computer Aided Drafting and Design, which I will present through this video, near the end of it—near the end of this video.

[''He begins flipping through a thick three-ring binder.'']

Anyway, yeah, got a whooole bunch of stuff here. Yeah, we can definitely franchise 'n' all this, you know. Even ideas of a ''Pokémon: Lightning Version'', where players can catch Sonichu and Rosechu in the wild, even breeding them to make the other individual electric hedgehog characters that are—have been portrayed in the book, such as Wild, Bubbles, Angelica, Punchy, and Magi-Chan, among others that have also been created as well, due—due—due to, you know, processes of the evolution stones, and daytime/nighttime evolutions, friendship, all that good stuff. All in the—the files here, including their little baby forms Sonee and Rosee, to evolutions from original Sonichu and Rosechu....

[''He displays the Sonichu and Rosechu figures again.'']

...Metonic and Vamprosa. Those characters are also featured on the CWCipedia. At least on Sonichu's page; I'm planning on making a page for Rosechu herself on that note. But, anyway, This—this—this Sonichu franchise, it has a biiig number of fans. I even have a number of fan submissions. Like, this here is a draw—is a piece of fan art that came from a girl I knew in Australia.
[[Image:SonichuCover10.jpg|thumb|right|PandaHalo's fanart, which serves as the cover of [[Sonichu 10]].]]
[''He holds up the picture, presumably from [[PandaHalo]], to the camera.'']

And that's a postcard sent from her, right there. She, uh, also, uh, created a Sonichu and Rosechu that's featured in the ''Number Nine'' book I'm currently drawing. They go by the name of [[Chloe]] and [[BlazeBob Sonichu|BlazeBob]].

[''Chris turns around the file revealing another piece of art.'']

Anyway, also, on the flip side of this page is from somebody else. It's possibly the best Sonichu fan art ever. Look at that. That's gonna be the cover of the, uh, the first book that's just based on Sonichu, which'll definitely be after ''Number Ten''...

[''He turns around the picture to display Panda's image.'']

...which this one will be the cover of.

[''He looks at the other image again.'']

Hm. This one came from, uh, "Zorah Q. Zowild," that's his YouTube name. Yeah, also, you know, I've received fan art in the snail mail, those are printed off the internet. Like this lovely one.
[[Image:AllisonSonichuRosechu.jpg|thumb|And from that, you know, that's, you know, she could have done a little better like, you know, like Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her]]
[''He holds up a drawing of Sonichu and Rosechu in formal wear.'']

That came from, uh, that came from a lovely woman named Allie, in Sun Valley, California. Thank you. Thank you very much. And from that, you know, that's, you know, she could have done a little better like, you know, like Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her. But, still, drew my own version of it.

[''He holds up a crude imitation of the previous drawing.'']
[[Image:CWCsEloquateSonichuandRosechu.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's "superior" version of Allie's drawing.]]
Heh, heh. Isn't that fun? Oh, of course, local art, in Charlottesville, an art—an artist did a caricature of me.

[''He turns around the file to display the caricature.'']

I included that in the ''Number Nine'' book on a billboard.

[''He holds up one more piece of art.'']

Here's another fun piece of fan art. It comes from, uh... B.C. Uh, okay, I can't, uh, Vancouver, B.C. Yeah. Anyway, yeah. [[Chris_and_reality|Very famous. Very, very famous.]] Yep. Uh, this one's just a fan letter from a... from a [[BlueSpike|Julie in Ohio]].

[''He holds up an image, but the high contrast of his video renders it impossible to make out.'']

Here's a little piece of fan art from a, uh, from someone who's possibly, uh, Japanese. Who lives in Virginia. And also, recently, this guy here, uh, Jason Darling...thank you very much; I got your package.

[''He holds up a folder of photographs.'']

He made a replica of my [[medallion]], which in them, which, you know, this one here is the original that I made myself from my own hands, from Crayola Model Magic and acrylic paints. In the comic books this allows me to transform into Chris-chan Sonichu. Which, that is described in the comic book pages as reposed in the CWCipedia. Also sent me a pack of Maple Story cards, so again, thank you Jason. I appreciate your encouragement, as well as everybody else's. Anyway, uh... hmm... yeah, I picked up a—also received a fan CD from a—from a, uhh... BK Jones in Texas. Oh, here's anutter—here's anutter fun one that's recent. Look at this envelope. Isn't that... cute? That's fun. And then they did a computer art... over there. This came all the way from... Portland... Oregon, I believe it is. And, uhh, I got various other... fan letters in—in this page. Uhh, I'd pull 'em out, but, you know, they're in—I just left them in their envelopes. Nope, fan art dere.

But, anyway, also, aside from that, uhh... I have definitely—I have definitely made a set of trading—'kay, this is my [[The Wall of Originals|homemade Pokémon trading cards]]... which I, uhh, used—which I keep at home for art's sake. A whole heck—got, like—whole—a ''whole lot'' of them here. This could definitely branch out.... And a very ''profitable'' thing, both for between Nintendo and Sega, and also with Son—also possibly with Sony, with, uhh—you know, with the a—also with, uhh, the anime show that maybe—maybe Cartoon Network and their people could help me out on... eh, when tha—when that TV show gets run. Where I'll voic—where I will be happy to—where I will be the ''director'', and I will be voicing myself as Sonichu. Listen to the difference: okay, this is me, Christian Weston Chandler, and this will be Sonichu: [''clearly taking after [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEIpeZFUnJE George] by not changing his voice whatsoever''] Hey, Rosechu! Let's go out and zap to the extreme! We got some bad guys to defeat! Come on, let's go! Yeah!

[''quietly musing over his own amazing degree of fail''] Hmm... odd, but... [''recovered from the shock, back at normal volume''] anyway, uhh, running low on time. Uhh, just a couple of, uhh, other things of interest: uhh, Sonichu was also previously featured in May, 2004, in this issue of ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine, in "The Crossing Quarterly"... with a, uhh, submission from my ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' game—for Nintendo GameCube, currently also available in—in other titles on DS and Nintendo Wii. And, also, uhh—and, shortly after that, it was featured... in a newsletter at the Piedmont Virgi—at the local [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]... among, uhh, other... published things. Also, uhh, when the, uhh, Sonic website was owiginawwy—was just CWCSonichu site, I had my own [[Sonichu's News Dash|News Dash newsletters]]. That lasted a short while.... Hmm. Actually, uh, yeah, but any—yeah, but, anyway, everybody knows on the CWCipedia, so....

[''sigh'']

Anyway, here: I'll show you the, uhh, just the, uhh, whole layout of the CWCville Shopping Center. I actually have all these... printouts from... my... [[CADD|Computer-Aided Drafting and cla—cla—Computer-Aided Drafting and Design classes]], but this is the last one, right before I graduated from Piedmont Virginia College. Then my degree and certificate in Commu—Computer-Aided Drafting and Design. It's very—it's very good. I mean, I would just imagine this in real life. It would even have a Pokémon Center in there, like the one in New York used to have, before it turned into a Nintendo World, USA. It shoulda stayed a ''Pokémon Center''! Now, that was definitely better appeal than just... Nintend—than just Nintendo, even though, yes, Nintendo... has the rights and everything, but... it was ''the Pokémon Center''! I mean... le—if the CWC—if the CWCville Shopping Center does get built... let's agree to put a Pokémon Center in it. And it has a Mayor's Office... right here, above the... front of—up above the main front entrance of the building... which is as portrayed in the comic book series. Aaand a whole buncha... other stuff I have, uh, here. It's just side-...stuff from... my... life, and whatever.

Anyway, uhh... uhh, pretty much, uhh, take care of it for, uhh, this par—for this portion of the, uhh, video, [''removes glasses''] so the next video to follow this one will be the... [''taps table''] PowerPoint presentation, so I will be reading audioly—I will be reading from that and pointing the camera toward the PC, [''quietly and unconfidently''] thank you. [''gives a half-assed Cub Scout salute'']

So... to Nintendo and Sega and Sony and all the other companies interested in... franchising with me here: [''gives another half-assed Cub Scout salute''] I await your call to my home phone... number or my cell phone.

Thank you very much, and have a [''gives ANOTHER half-assed [[Chris's mannerisms|Cub Scout salute]]''] ''pleasant day''!
{{CWCipedia|chris=Sonichu Presentations}}
{{clear}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[14 November 2009]]|nextlink=[[Sonichu Powerpoint]]|}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

A near public apology

2010-01-06T05:39:54Z

Joson: /* Video */

"'''A Near Public Apology'''", posted 11 [[July 2009]], is a public apology (nearly, because he wasn't expecting trolls to find his account - unfortunately, he didn't count on the power of OXYCLEANFANATIC) in an attempt to get his PSN account back. Note that in this video, Chris is wearing neither his Sonichu [[Medallion of Fail|medallion]] nor his [[Amnyfest Ring|class ring]], meaning his apology is insincere, and possibly proving that his powers are granted to him by his anal beads after all.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = A near public apology
| image = {{#ev:youtube|IRqttTpeHWI}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 11 July 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Reason.png]] Reason
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers]]
| next = [[Chris's Big Night Out II]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

Hello. I genmaking this video to apologize for the, uh, last three, uh, videooos of which I uploaded addressed only to the three individuaaals, you see, amongst, uh, two outta three, they were, uh, behi--they were wearing masks, and it just became very suspicious to me. And, uh, they were trying to uh, get--trying to get trust--get some trust from me...so easily but I don't give my trust away very easily. ''(Quite possibly the lie-est lie ever lied.)'' So, I said what I said only because...I just did not believe them at all.

And, uh, to anybody who misinterpreted the uh, feelings behind all--behind that, uh, I apologize to everybody who saw that and got that impression, and also I apologize for the inconvenience of losing my previous [[YouTube]] account, but, uh, got--but then I got the new one. But anyway I will not make such videos again.

But still, uh, I'm not 'cepting, uh, videos of such caliber as uh those people have--those two individuals have done. And as for the third one, uhh...eeh has huh--has...inadvertently got into my privacy again, by uh...by in, the, uh, hacker, so...down with that individual.

So, again, I apologize for the inconveniences, and any wrongful impressions, so...let's hope we can move on and...I'll get back, uh, things that, uh, were lost the past weekend. Thank you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers]]|nextlink=[[Chris's Big Night Out II]]|}}
{{Troll Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

IPods Down and Listen Up

2010-01-06T04:10:10Z

Joson: /* Remixed */

{{honest}}
"'''iPods Down and Listen Up'''" (known as "'''iPods Down and Listen Up.MOV'''") is a video uploaded the 15 December 2009 in which [[Chris]], apparently under the influence of Viagra, [[fail|fails]] [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|once]][[SingStar Challenge Round 5| again]] at <s>rapping</s> life.

The rap itself appears to be improvised on the spot, and Chris apparently alludes to what most people would call [[rape]]. It is unclear as to what precisely Chris is under the [[Alcohol|influence]] of, or how he [[Chris's Big Night Out|obtained it]].

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = iPods Down and Listen Up
| image = {{#ev:youtube|Ao6bUGbCNU8}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 15 December 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Music.png]] Music
| Shirt = {{StraightWhiteLinesShirt}} Straight White Lines
| previous = [[Congrats, Jack Black]]
| next = [[Hello, Juffalo]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''Chris makes liberal use of his gangsta-speak in this video'']

Yo, what is up, homies, and homes, and home-misses... dudettes and dudates. This ain't no [[Captain's Log|update]] on da [[Sonichu]] [[duck|thang]]; still workin' on it, but listen [''tries to turn this into a song''] up, up-up, up, up, up-up! Listen up! Put down your iPods, and listen up! I had a test that shows... [[Duck|stock market]] had a rise in hooooooes! I tell you what now. Tell ya what, tell ya what (what-what, what).

[''a momentary pause to recollect'']

Momentary pause to recollect. I tell ya what, ladies, I have a game. Let's play Jungle Fever (Jungle Fever)! I'm the la—I am the manly '''tiga''' (manly tiga)! You're the sleek, sexy panther! [[Rape|I pounce on you, you run away]]. I haven't missed that chase, anyway! And we chase for a while (a, a while), and then you wear out, and you take it like a gal (gal), and then we pump [[Chris and Sex|(pump-pump, pump, pump, pump-pump)]] until we'll be have our little [[Crystal Weston Chandler|tiga-panther cubs]]!

Or for—since it's Christmas time, let's make like I'm Mister—yo' Misses Claus. I have a... good ole heat, 'cuz I took... a bit o'... [[Wikipedia:Viagra|Viagra]]. Bam, ba-bam, bam, ho, ho-OH!

...Word! I have a confidence booster... and my confidence is at the max! So... there. That's the word of the day. Still an update on the [[CWCipedia]], eyyyy?

Word up. Peace out.

==Remixed==

<center>
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Momentary Pause to Recollect (Bam Ba Bam Bam) by Chris-chan Ft. Bill Hicks
| video = {{#ev:youtube|wN3EWjebiMo}}
| Stardate = 15 December 2009
| Maker = TwoCows23
| Subject = [[Chris]]
| Video Type = Remix
}}</center>

==External links==
*[http://www.youtubedoubler.com/?video1=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DAo6bUGbCNU8&start1=&video2=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DNcJytCvBrWk&start2=8 Gangsta Chris]
*[http://www.youtubedoubler.com/?video1=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fv%2FAo6bUGbCNU8&start1=0&video2=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fv%2F9iNlAT9BLzo&start2=9 Another mashup]
*[http://www.youtubedoubler.com/?video1=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fv%2FAo6bUGbCNU8&start1=0&video2=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D-iKtiveApUo&start2= And another one]
*[http://www.youtubedoubler.com/?video1=http://www.youtube.com/v/Ao6bUGbCNU8&start1=0&video2=http://www.youtube.com/v/-QRbQfwae9E&start2=0 And another]
*[http://www.youtubedoubler.com/?video1=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fv%2FAo6bUGbCNU8&start1=0&video2=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DSXDpShy8LiM&start2= 187 on a Jerkop]
*[http://tubedubber.com/#Ao6bUGbCNU8:yiwqKV2rLzo:100:85:0:0:true CWC Vs. RZA]
*[http://tubedubber.com/#Ao6bUGbCNU8:eRCJow2tKso:100:50:0:0:true Still C.W.C]
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Congrats, Jack Black]]|nextlink=[[Hello, Juffalo]]|}}
{{Music Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers

2010-01-06T03:47:21Z

Joson:

'''CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers''' is a series of three videos posted on 10 [[July 2009]] by [[Chris]] for three individuals: ShmionSonozaki, sonichuizcool and oxycleanfanatic2264. Their accounts were already closed when the videos were posted.

Deemed "Too Hot for [[YouTube]]" for Chris's very blunt and inflammatory rhetoric (calling individuals retards, telling individuals to kill themselves, etc), it lead to an immediate suspension of his account. Luckily a brave patriot discovered them when they were new and found them lulzy enough to mirror, allowing them to then be archived by the [[TheCWCvilleLibrary]]. Each video begins with Chris holding up a piece of paper with the user's name written on it and playing the same recorded disclaimer in the background.

Ironically, Chris called the users "[[naïve]]" and revealed his particular disdain for this word calling it "the most cruelest of words", and then he proceeded to butcher its definition by saying it meant being stupid. It has been speculated on [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]] that he might have been slightly intoxicated when making the videos. He also threatens one user with a detective. Considering that his demands were not met, and we never heard from this detective again, there was surely no detective.

==CWC Calls Out ShmionSonozaki==

{{Tardrage}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Calls Out ShmionSonozaki
| image = {{#ev:youtube|aqHzjnCcOw8}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 10 July 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]]
| previous = [[CWC Update 7 July 2009]]
| next = [[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers#CWC Calls Out sonichuizcool|CWC Calls Out sonichuizcool]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[The screen shows a piece of paper with the name ‘ShmionSonozaki’ written on it in felt tip pen.]

The following is addressed to this individual whose YouTube account is this only. The opinions and if—feelings and emotions expressed in this video are not res—are not representative towards any persons other than this one. Thank you very much.

[camera cut to Chris]

Hellooo. Hmm… you hide under a veil. I don’t know, are you a pretty woman? Or are you a, or do you hide a beard underneath that veil. Or do you hide that beard. Perhaps you are actually a dude, or even worse, a hermaphrodite. You know what, you get not much of response from me, because, you even delete your own account. You are such a cowardly naïve retarded individual. Naïve is the cruelest of words cause it questions ones intelbi—intelligence... and that’s why I’m calling you… naïve retard.

[camera cut]

And also, I know you live… in Pennsylvania.

==CWC Calls Out sonichuizcool==

{{Tardrage}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Calls Out sonichuizcool
| image = {{#ev:youtube|18_-CUNjuE8}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 10 July 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]]
| previous = [[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers#CWC Calls Out ShmionSonozaki|CWC Calls Out ShmionSonozaki]]
| next = [[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers#CWC Calls Out oxycleanfanatic2264|CWC Calls Out oxycleanfanatic2264]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[The screen shows a piece of paper with the name ‘sonichuizcool’ written on it in felt tip pen.]

The following is addressed to this individual whose YouTube account is this only.
the opinions and if—feelings and emotions expressed in this video are not res—are not representative towards any persons other then this one. than you very much.

[camera cut to Chris]

Hmm... I don’t know... You seem to hide behind a face mask... and a beanie. Who do you think you are? [[Sailor_Moon|Tuxedo Kamen]]? Aehh, you’re so naïve and [[slow in the minds|slow in the mind]], I couldn’t even give a dang about you. And if you want my trust you’re gonna have to do some earning bang, you’re gonna have to come out and into the open. You godda come out where I can meet you. Aehh? Aehh? Dumbass.

==CWC Calls Out oxycleanfanatic2264==

{{Tardrage}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Calls Out oxycleanfanatic2264
| image = {{#ev:youtube|DfbFnB9jWcs}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 10 July 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]]
| previous = [[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers#CWC Calls Out sonichuizcool|CWC Calls Out sonichuizcool]]
| next = [[A near public apology]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[The screen shows a piece of paper with the name ‘oxycleanfanatic2264’ written on it in felt tip pen. Below it says 'not a YouTube handle...something']

The following is addressed to this individual whose YouTube account is this only.
The opinions and if—feelings and emotions expressed in this video are not res—are not representative towards any persons other than this one. Thank you very much.

[camera cut to Chris]

Hey! You! I know you. I have your name! You live in Sacramento California. I have a detective on the case and I am going to send him against you as soon as possible. Which that would be in the next few days, or tomorrow when I can get in touch with him. And I will get in touch with him. And you think you’re sooo [sic] smart and you think you’re soo'''ooo''' corny by doing the things that you have done so far, mister hackerrrr!
You think you’re so smart? Well you know what? you’re just a naïve retard! And naïve is my least favorite word because it s'''ou'''nds like nails on a chalkboard. You naïve retarded bastard! [...] You should just go ha- you should go hang yourself after you have given me back what you have stolen from me. Do it '''now'''! Give’m back to me! Or I will send the detective and the po-lice on your case. You bastard you, naïve retarded bastard.

[camera cut]

And not only that but your are such a coward you dare not even show your face like others have done partially on their YouTube videos. You are such a cowardly naïve retarded '''bastard'''!

[camera cut]

That’s right, I’m calling you out!

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 7 July 2009]]|nextlink=[[A near public apology]]|}}
{{Troll Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
[[Category:Videos with RAGE]]

CWC Update 7 July 2009

2010-01-06T03:33:22Z

Joson: /* Video */

In "'''CWC Update 7 July 2009'''" (officially "'''CWC Update 07072009'''"), [[Chris]] dispels myths that he has a [[Wikipedia:Death Note|Death Note]]. He also goes on a bit more on how he didn't kill [[Billy Mays]], and that he shouldn't be considered a scapegoat. Apparently, Chris believes that it's still the month of June.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 7 July 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|TNR-f04u_IU}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 7 July 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Rumours.png]] Rumours
| Shirt = [[Image:Greenstripedshirt.png]] Green Striped
| previous = [[For G4s Web Soup]]
| next = [[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: June 7th, 2009.

I wish to, uh... dispel the, uh... rumor that has come upon since my last, uh... [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009|video update]], which was about me write—supposedly writing any "Death Notes".... Because, you know, that's just an [[anime]], y'all—yeah, those who are blaming me for that, that's an anime; it's not real. I'm not writing anybody—I'm not writing any such notes, okay?

And don't go blaming me for, uh... been a—been the blame men—of, uh, somebody to blame; it's because couple of people y'all like passed away, [''with a high-pitched voice''] ''I had nothing to do with it!'' I was at my cousin's wedding that weekend! So please, just lay off, no more false rumors or accusations. I'm serious.

Cut it out. It's not cool. If you wanna blame somebody, go blame somebody else, like the people who actually had anything to do with it... or the drugs that have... done unto them.

So there. Have a good day, peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[For G4s Web Soup]]|nextlink=[[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-07-07]]

For G4s Web Soup

2010-01-06T03:30:31Z

Joson: /* Watch */

[[Chris]] finds out that [[I Got A Fish|one of his videos]] was used on '''G4's Web Soup''' show, and thinking this is a respectful tribute making him appear as a respectable person, he promotes himself to the real TRUE and HONEST ladies in Charlottesville and Ruckersville area.

He removed this video a few days after he posted it.

==Watch==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = For G4s Web Soup
| image = {{#ev:youtube|0nEmcLD1IA4}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 2 July 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[CWC Update 1 July 2009]]
| next = [[CWC Update 7 July 2009]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

'Ello, dis video is uh, a response to G4, who is uh, using one of my [[YouTube]] clips for their show, Web Soup.

I am - I would like to say that I am honored to be selected for the, for the TV show on G4; I have the channel on my Comcast selection. Anyway, I originally did that video- That was my first audio clip I ever recorded. [''high pitch''] I just randomly felt like doing that right after eyecreated- eyecreate debut on the [[PSN|Playstation Network]]. and Y'all can look up the date it was originally up there on the Playstation Store.

Anyway. [''[[glasses]] removal''] Ah just felt like adding a little dance to that song and being silly, so, just a little, random, fun humor. Every body has [''slurred jumble of words''] to a little fun. [''weird eye movements''] I'm honored to be on television. Mm, y'know, praise, still. But anyway, ah, ladies in Char- real true honest ladies in [[Charlottesville]] area, [[Ruckersville]], if any of them are watching this, I'm still single and looking, so yeah, like y'know call me on my cell phone if you can find it, or find me in person in Charlottesville. I'm [[obesity|around]], I get around.

Okay, so everybody have a pleasant day. [''sign''] Peace.

==External links==
*[http://g4tv.com/websoup/ G4's Web Soup]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 1 July 2009]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 7 July 2009]]|}}
{{Game Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

CWC Update 1 July 2009

2010-01-06T03:27:59Z

Joson: /* Video */

"'''CWC Update 1 July 2009'''" (officially "'''CWC Update 07012009'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] denies that he was responsible for the untimely death of [[CWCville]] Mayor [[Billy Mays]]. His alibi was that he was at his cousin Jonathan Carey's wedding. He explains that he was forced to say that Billy Mays was the mayor of CWCville because of [[BlueSpike]]. He also mentions that he's continuing his [[Love Quest]] and that he will [[Lie|finish the long-awaited Sonichu Comic]], which is utter bullshit because he's a lazy retard who can't keep a promise.

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 1 July 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|Yf3cuIhlzaU}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 1 July 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[I'm Sorry, Dude]]
| next = [[For G4s Web Soup]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''sigh''] [[Captain's Log]], Stardate: July 1st, 2009.

I, uh, am recording this video to, uh, relinquish the false...ly—the false, stupid rumors of me having an—anything to do... with, uh, the [[Chris and death|death]]—with the recent death of Billy Mays.

[''sighs''] It's... [''voice becomes unnaturally high-pitched'']—it's such a slanderous lie you go—itha—it's because somebody dies, you go blame it on the nearest per—you just go blame it on the nearest person.... It just ticks me off. [''makes some kind of weird noise and does something with his teeth'']

And, anyway, I was actually at my cousin's wedding—[[Minor_Family_Members#Jonathan_Carey|Jonathan Carey]]—Jonathan Carey, in Red Oak, Virginia. You can look him up. ''I was there the weekend''. You can even talk to my Uncle Raymond, who lives nearby.

Alright. And, anyway, the cause of his deck, and I read this to you from a printout from his Wikipedia page (and I quote):

<blockquote>"On Jula—On June 29th after an initial autopsy on Mays' body, Doctor Vernard Adams [''pronounces it "Venard"''] the Hillsborough County, F...—Florduh bedical examiner stated that m—he suffered from ''hypertensive heart disease'' and that a ''heart at''tack was the likely cause of his ''death''."</blockquote>

I had nothin' to do with it. So ''quit'' the false rumors!

And, anyway, as for the past doc—the past statement that I did on a video—I did on the video upon the mayorship: he, [[Billy Mays]], was never the mayor of [[CWCville]]. ''Never the mayor''. I was lying out my ass when I said that, because I was being blackmailed, durin' the [[Julie]] fiasco. ''Curse'' that li'l 13-year-old brat!

[''sighs''] Deep breaths.... Deep breaths....

So... there you go. That's it. ''That's it.'' Alright? And I am thinking more about the comics, I'm drawing more, so... leave me alone. Let me be. I'm trying to find myself—trying d' complete my life sass as well especially finding the woman to be my sweetheart.

Have a good day, peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I'm Sorry, Dude]]|nextlink=[[For G4s Web Soup]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-07-01]]

CWC Update 1 July 2009

2010-01-06T03:27:30Z

Joson: /* Video */

"'''CWC Update 1 July 2009'''" (officially "'''CWC Update 07012009'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] denies that he was responsible for the untimely death of [[CWCville]] Mayor [[Billy Mays]]. His alibi was that he was at his cousin Jonathan Carey's wedding. He explains that he was forced to say that Billy Mays was the mayor of CWCville because of [[BlueSpike]]. He also mentions that he's continuing his [[Love Quest]] and that he will [[Lie|finish the long-awaited Sonichu Comic]], which is utter bullshit because he's a lazy retard who can't keep a promise.

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 1 July 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|Yf3cuIhlzaU}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 1 May 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[I'm Sorry, Dude]]
| next = [[For G4s Web Soup]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''sigh''] [[Captain's Log]], Stardate: July 1st, 2009.

I, uh, am recording this video to, uh, relinquish the false...ly—the false, stupid rumors of me having an—anything to do... with, uh, the [[Chris and death|death]]—with the recent death of Billy Mays.

[''sighs''] It's... [''voice becomes unnaturally high-pitched'']—it's such a slanderous lie you go—itha—it's because somebody dies, you go blame it on the nearest per—you just go blame it on the nearest person.... It just ticks me off. [''makes some kind of weird noise and does something with his teeth'']

And, anyway, I was actually at my cousin's wedding—[[Minor_Family_Members#Jonathan_Carey|Jonathan Carey]]—Jonathan Carey, in Red Oak, Virginia. You can look him up. ''I was there the weekend''. You can even talk to my Uncle Raymond, who lives nearby.

Alright. And, anyway, the cause of his deck, and I read this to you from a printout from his Wikipedia page (and I quote):

<blockquote>"On Jula—On June 29th after an initial autopsy on Mays' body, Doctor Vernard Adams [''pronounces it "Venard"''] the Hillsborough County, F...—Florduh bedical examiner stated that m—he suffered from ''hypertensive heart disease'' and that a ''heart at''tack was the likely cause of his ''death''."</blockquote>

I had nothin' to do with it. So ''quit'' the false rumors!

And, anyway, as for the past doc—the past statement that I did on a video—I did on the video upon the mayorship: he, [[Billy Mays]], was never the mayor of [[CWCville]]. ''Never the mayor''. I was lying out my ass when I said that, because I was being blackmailed, durin' the [[Julie]] fiasco. ''Curse'' that li'l 13-year-old brat!

[''sighs''] Deep breaths.... Deep breaths....

So... there you go. That's it. ''That's it.'' Alright? And I am thinking more about the comics, I'm drawing more, so... leave me alone. Let me be. I'm trying to find myself—trying d' complete my life sass as well especially finding the woman to be my sweetheart.

Have a good day, peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I'm Sorry, Dude]]|nextlink=[[For G4s Web Soup]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-07-01]]

Chris's Big Night Out

2010-01-06T03:24:03Z

Joson:

[[Image:Cwcgreatime.PNG|thumb|left|He had a great time. :D]]
[[Image:Z100_0533.jpg|thumb|Hail Satan!]]
On 12 [[June 2009]], [[Chris]] visited a local bar/restaurant, where he encountered a pair of [[trolls|fans]] who recorded and uploaded clips of their time spent with Chris to [[YouTube]]. This event has been referred to as '''Chris's Big Night Out'''.

==Grip 'n' Sip==

In first video, Chris broke his 27-year period of abstaining from [[alcohol]] and had a sip (and then two fucking glasses) of [[Wikipedia:Long Island Iced Tea|Long Island Iced Tea]]. Chris reportedly tried the drink because he saw Marge Simpson try it in [[Wikipedia:The Great Money Caper|an episode]] of ''The Simpsons'', and because it didn't sound like a very alcoholic drink. Note that, when he swallows the drink, he performs the same reaction as when he swallows his [[navy]].

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Grip 'n' Sip
| image = {{#ev:youtube|xuTPXv9Mthg}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 12 June 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009]]
| next = [[Chris's Big Night Out#Chris Loves The Nightlife|Chris Loves The Nightlife]]
}}</center>

{{quote|Mmm! Goes down salty.}}

===Transcript===
[[Image:Cwc_salty_iced_tea.jpg|thumb|[[Semen#Recycling|What was going through Chris's mind.]]]]
Girl: So… so what do you have right now, Chris?

Chris: Long Island Iced Tea.

Guy: Say that one more time?

Chris: Long Island Iced Tea.

Guy: Alright… rock it!

Girl: Okay!

[''Chris shuts his eyes and takes a tiny sip'']

Girl: What do you think of it?

[''Chris swallows the sip with some difficulty'']

Chris: Mmm! Goes down salty.

Girl: Kinda salty?

Chris: Yeah… but it's pretty tasty.

Girl: Yeah.

Guy: Rock on! Alright!

Girl: So… ''look excited!''

[''Chris smiles almost imperceptibly'']

Girl: [''laughs''] You don't look very excited!

Guy: No, “excited”—no, “excited”—“Excited” is—

==Chris Loves The Nightlife==
In another notable video, Chris dances around and sings "[[Wikipedia:I Love the Nightlife|I Love the Nightlife]]" like a [[autism|retard]]. While it's not surprising that Chris still thinks he can sing, it's shocking that he visited a club, since he's said before that he would never do such a thing.

It should come as no surprise to anyone—except perhaps Chris—that "I Love the Nightlife" is a song with a large [[gay]] following. Long-time [[trolls]] will notice that Chris made use of this same song during his [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters]] video.
It should be noted that this song was also featured in several episodes of ''The Simpsons'', like the Long Island Iced Tea he drank during the course of the evening.
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris Loves The Nightlife
| image = {{#ev:youtube|0rGhHUwdB94}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 12 June 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[Chris's Big Night Out#Grip 'n' Sip|Grip 'n' Sip]]
| next = [[Chris's Big Night Out#Sonichu Rocks!|Sonichu Rocks!]]
}}</center>

{{quote|I love the nightlife! I've got to boogie!}}

===Transcript===

[''Chris sings all of “I Love the Nightlife”, his voice sporadically cracking and his arms periodically flailing'']

DJ: Ah, yes, indeed! Christopher!

==Sonichu Rocks!==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Sonichu Rocks!
| image = {{#ev:youtube|__TCYRdw4p8}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 12 June 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[Chris's Big Night Out#Chris Loves The Nightlife|Chris Loves The Nightlife]]
| next = [[Chris's Big Night Out#Chris's Big Black Balloon|Chris's Big Black Balloon]]
}}</center>

{{quote|Sonichu's still ''rockin' in my head!''}}

===Transcript===

Chris: Sonichu's still ''rockin' in my head!''

Girl: [''laughs'']

==Chris's Big Black Balloon==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris's Big Black Balloon
| image = {{#ev:youtube|dOUd46P6ugw}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 12 June 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[Chris's Big Night Out#Sonichu Rocks!|Sonichu Rocks!]]
| next = [[Chris's Big Night Out#Chris and His PSP|Chris and His PSP]]
}}</center>

{{quote|Like a balloon!}}

===Transcript===

Girl: [presumably to Chris] —right now.

Chris: Like a balloon!

Girl: [''laughs'']

Guy: [to Chris] Y'all catch a balloon fish?

Man in background: Whoop! Whoop!

Guy: [to a passing bro] Hey, dude—check it out! [[I Got A Fish|He got a fish!]]

Bro: Oh.

Girl: [''laughs again'']

==Chris and His PSP==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris and His PSP
| image = {{#ev:youtube|EjCO0agsGL8}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 12 June 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redshirt.png]] Red
| previous = [[Chris's Big Night Out#Chris's Big Black Balloon|Chris's Big Black Balloon]]
| next = [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
}}</center>

{{quote|You get to see two naked ladies.}}

===Transcript===

Chris: I was, uh… of the winning videos in the [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|Parappa the Rapper Contest]], when they came out with the PSP version of that game.

[''awkward silence'']

Girl: Smile!

[''Chris smiles weakly'']

Girl: [''laughs'']

Guy: What about the—and explain the—explain the omega one again?

Chris: Got it with the, uh, pre-release demo disc of…'' God of War: Chains of Olympus''.

Girl: Do you like that game?

Chris: Yeah! It was fun. I completed it.

Girl: ''Ohhh.''

Chris: And especially, y’know, there's a fun part in the beginning, and, uh, you get to see two naked ladies, and… Kratos basically has sex with them, but it shoots ''off-screen''—

Girl: Two naked ladies? [''laughs'']

Chris: —and then, like, it shakes all over the place!

Guy: I tell ya: a game—

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009]]|nextlink=[[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]|}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}
{{Music Videos}}

[[Category: Social life]]

Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009

2010-01-05T05:13:32Z

Joson: /* Video */

{{quote| "And you've got to be living in Virginia, ladies. 18 to 27. Smoke-free. Caring, true, honest. Not [[niggo|black]]."|[[Chris]], being a ladies' man.}}

Originally uploaded as "'''CWC Update 05222009'''".

As usual, [[Chris]]'s top priority is to dispel any false allegations or claims about himself—in this case, statements made on [[cwcville.com]] by the persons who hacked it. Chris explains that he has closed the cwcville.com domain and has no plans to reopen it in the near future. He also notes he won't be making as many videos in the future. He seems surprisingly cognizant of the fact that, if he stops producing content on the internet, then the [[troll]]s will have no new material to use against him. This is generally considered to be the influence of [[Rocky]] in action.

Chris seems to realize that, if he disappears from the internet, his loyal fan base will be denied his masterworks, so he advises his fans to track down the trolls if they're bored and have nothing better to do.

Most notable in this video are two awkwardly long periods of silence in which Chris either stares into his [[PSEye]] or down at the monitor to check how he looks. Chris seems to be struggling to assume the appropriate facial expression, and—being Chris—never succeeds in attaining it. The precise emotions Chris wishes to convey from 1:16-1:27 and from 1:40-1:45 may never be known.

Chris again plugs his [[Fuck Quest]] and how he will only accept face-to-face meetings, unless you call his [[father]] and work it out through him. He ends the video with the phrase "see y'all on the campus", likely referring to the [[University of Virginia]].

The new, post-[[Julie]] model of the [[Sonichu medallion]] is briefly shown, either to help identify him to potential girlfriends or to authenticate the validity of any future websites he creates.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|v0JuK_5ZaOE}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 22 May 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Website.png]] Website
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Vert. Red
| previous = [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters]]
| next = [[Chris's Big Night Out]]
}}</center>

{{quote|Down with those slanderous trolls!}}

==Transcript==
[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: May 22nd, 2009.

[''inhales deeply''] I [''voice cracks''] wish to, uh, let y'all know that—uh, please disregard the, uh, statement that was on the—uh, on the, uh, [[cwcville.com]] front page… as that was obviously—that was an obvious lie, made by the [[Trolls|trolls]], who hacked into my… account.

But anyway, I also would like to announce that as of this moment, the, uh, website… is down. I have closed the account associated with it. I may come back with a new webs—with another website and new st—and new comics and stuff; I may not.

''But''… to my loyal [[Trolls|fans]]: I thank you for your full—for your support and appreciate your efforts, but… so, uh, what y'all can do now is, like, y'know, find—go to your normal lives, uh… [[Homos|live free]]. ''Or''… if you want somethin’—[[Monthly tugboat|if you have ''nothing'' to do]], you can track down the trolls for me, dis—including that [[Clyde Cash]].

Down with those slanderous trolls! I give them ''[[fat|no more food]]'' to feed off of! [''places hands on hips in a mock pose of authority'']

[''stares silently at the camera for a good ten seconds'']
[[Image:New_sonichu_medallion.jpg|thumb|[[Sonichu medallion]] sighting.]]
[''begins moving eyebrows strangely as he watches himself on his monitor''] I'm ''straight'', and I will only accept ''person-al''—person-to-person encounters. ''No'' e-mails, ''no'' phone calls. Unless you call m—on my h—home phone, and talk to my ''[[father]]''… [''stops in mid-sentence and stares silently at the camera while seemingly ticcing''] …and you gotta be living in Virginia, ''ladies''! 18 to 27... smoke-free... caring, true, honest. Not [[Niggos|black]].

And the trolls? Just… stay away, period.

Y'all have a good day now. Peace!

[''jump cut'']

Oh, and, also, before I forget… I w—until the day I put up the website… again, if I should decide to… or not… I wi—I will not be puttin' up an—too many new videos either. So… any videos that are obviously, uh, falsified with my face that might ''say'' otherwise... do not believe them. Only—uh, I will let you know, obviously, when the website is back up. [''holds up [[ring]]''] You will know it is true.

[''jump cut to a shaky shot of the [[Sonichu medallion]] hanging from a chain on the ceiling'']

Meet till then. See y'all on [[University of Virginia|the campus]].

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters]]|nextlink=[[Chris's Big Night Out]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-05-22]]

CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters

2010-01-05T05:08:29Z

Joson:

After a two-week silence (and video purge), Chris-chan posts up a brand new video called '''IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters''', saying that he will not accept any encounters with 18-(insert his age here) females, unless it's in real life. Same racist requirements apply. Afterwards, he displays a stinging [[random-access humor|comical wit]] that even Oscar Wilde himself would be enamored of, and left him in such demand with the ladies.

{{quote| Simple as that; I will not accept any e-mails or phone calls; ONLY REAL LIFE ENCOUNTERS. So, if you are a True, Honest, Caring (18-27-year old, smoke-free, non-black) Woman, who desires at least a pleasant conversation with me ;) , you'll have to be living in Virginia and press your luck on a Chance Encounter.

With that statement aside, a new piece of comical wit after the music; laugh it up.|Video description}}

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters
| image = {{#ev:youtube|0GstQFra2D0}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 20 May 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Vert. Red
| previous = [[Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up]]
| next = [[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009]]
}}</center>

{{quote|I am still a single, legitimate, eligible male.}}

===Transcript===

I wish to make a, uh, general statement for I—uh, some of the comical wit. [''inhales deeply, followed immediately by a jump cut'']

Granted, now, I am ''still'' a single, legitimate, eligible male. I still am lookth—I still am looking for an 18-27 year-old, smoke-free, non-alcoholic, non-[[niggos|black]] woman. But most importantly, she's gotta be caring, true, and honest. [''an empty annotation box appears around Chris's upper body, revealing "IN-PERSON CHANCE ENCOUNTERS ONLY, LADIES." when hovered over'']

[jump cut to "I Love the Nightlife" playing loudly in the background]

So, if there are any true, caring, honest women… ''not'' any trolls… that wish to, uh, look me up and, uh, schedule a date, you'll have to, uh, find me in person. [''an annotation appears, reading "NO CALLS OR E-MAILS! FIND ME IN PERSON, COME SAY HEY, AND BE LUCKY."''] And, also, it'll have to be a chance meeting… in which—on that case, I will ''not'' be accepting any phone calls… [''removes glasses dramatically''] or e-mails. So… you'll just have to try to press your—you'll just have to press your luck on, uh, getting a date with me. So, that's just the way life is. [''dances a retarded wiggle dance'']

[''jump cut to the music no longer playing'']

So, now, with that, uh, note aside, uh, I wish to, uh, c—uh, commute the, uh, new comical wit of which I have just created today.

[''begins singing a song of his own creation, providing lyrics through annotations'']

<blockquote>“Oh, I'm single and lonely, and possibly a bit horny. 
But that ain't fit for a "Droll" "Sit-chee-ation", so now I'll just make it corny.”</blockquote>

[''replaces glasses on face''] I laugh at you, you stupid [[trolls]]. ''Die!'' [''raises eyebrows dramatically'']

Peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up]]|nextlink=[[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009]]|}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up

2010-01-05T05:00:28Z

Joson: /* Video */

In [[Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up]] (officially '''Keep CWCs Wikipedia Up'''), [[Chris]] urges the [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] fanbase to keep up his Wikipedia page after it was [[Chris and Wikipedia|deleted]] by THOSE NO GOOD WIKIPEDIA ADMINISTRATORS so that no more [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|vicious lies and slander]] will spread about him on the internet.

==Video==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up
| image = {{#ev:youtube|KbKyQLgTbFs}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 1 May 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Redblueshirt.png]] Red Blue
| previous = [[MEOW]]
| next = [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters]]
}}</center>

{{quote|I mean let's keep my wikipedia page up and going strong because I have contributed a '''lot''' to society, a lot more than anybody can think...|}}
===Transcript===

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: May 3rd, 2009.

I have recently started and, uh, completed the whole bunch of, uh, truth and honesty about myself, in my very own [[Wikipedia]] page, as you may wa- as you may have heard, I put the link on [http://www.cwcville.com/CWCipedia/CWCTruth.html www.cwcville.com] you know? But then, recently I hear from my, uh, sweetheart who, uh, looked it up, thatta-that, uh, apparently the text was released by the admin saying that [''Demeaning voice''] "I was not important enough". Well I'm gonna go back on there and, uh, undo what they did, get all the, uh, honest truth about myself put back up. And I would appreciate the, uh, support of my [[Trolls|True Honest Fans]], uh, eh, you know, they go to the Wikipedia pages and they see the, uh, unimportant stuff there, uh, if y'all- if that person has a account you know, just undo what they did, I would appreciate that very much.

And uh, also, I have the suppo- also, I have contributed alot more than they think, I mean, I have my own wide fanbase from my [[Sonichu]] & [[Rosechu]], I now have contributed a lot more to my local society than you can ever imagine, I mean... I earned- I mean, '''I made the good grades''' between the high school and th- and the college and whatnot. I have done a LOT of fond, of good honest fond volunteer work at the ''[[Pokemon]]'' trading card league-game card gay- trading card game league, before i got kicked out last June, in 2008 by that uh- by that uh, jerk, [[Michael Schneider (Game Place)|Michael Snyder]]. And yet- and he's still being kind of a jerk because you know, I apologized in [[YouTube]] and yet he's- yet he did not ca- he did not call me or let me know that I'm allowed back in there, but then again at this point... [''Heavy stuttering''] during th- at this dish- at this indecish- that's neither here or there.

But anyway, let's keep my '''YouTube'''- I mean let's keep my wikipedia page up and going strong because I have contributed a '''lot''' to society, a lot more than anybody can think...

[''Loses trail of his thoughts''] Isdh.. yeah.

And also you know [[Vanessa Hudgens]]? She started her ow- she s- she did her own Wikipedia page as well, she told me so herself, so ther- so therefore I have the right to do the same thing for myself as well.

[''Insanely high-pitched whiny voice''] '''AND ALSO!''' listen to my ancesterds- ancestry. I have an anc- my- my ancestoron-uh-on likewise, is [[Anne Boleyn]], so I'm descended all the way back to Mary Boleyn. Think about that, Wikipedia! think about that!. Even as- ev- including the, uh, first Earl of Portland.

So, don't you dare take- so don't take me down again! I am well worthy!

Y'all have a good day now. Peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[MEOW]]|nextlink=[[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-05-03]]

MEOW

2010-01-05T04:58:04Z

Joson: /* Video */

{{quote|I did this Meow in the video; probably my best cat-call ever. :D Laugh it up. :D|Chris}}

Released on 24 [[April 2009]], [[MEOW]] is [[Chris|Chris's]] shortest work to date. This video depicts Spas, an anthropomorphic cat, playing the piano at [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|Chris's wedding]]. Chris makes a meowing sound, of which he claims to be extremely proud.

Although the imitation is actually decent, Chris [[fail]]s hard in this 4-second video by adding an annotation box onto a corner of the cat's face, to point out the obvious - namely that there is a cat. He also fails in that he believes a "cat-call" is the same thing as a meow.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = MEOW
| image = {{#ev:youtube|QBch20orAq0}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 24 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| previous = [[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]]
| next = [[Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up]]
}}</center>

{{quote|Meeeooowww!}}

==Transcript==

[an empty annotation box appears around Spas's face, revealing “Here's the kitty!” when hovered over]

''Meeeooowww!''

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZVh3dqXz2Q MEOW]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]]|nextlink=[[Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up]]|}}
{{Videos}}
[[category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

CWC Address to Unilever About AXE

2010-01-05T04:53:51Z

Joson: /* Video */

'''CWC Address to Unilever About AXE''' is a video made when [[Chris]] learned that [[Axe | AXE]], the line of men's hygiene products (also known as LYNX by Eurofags and Britfags alike), is popular among [[homos|gay men]]. This threatened to shatter his entire worldview, since the marketing campaign for AXE revolves around a crude promise that hot women will be all over anyone slathered in the stuff, and he takes this completely at face value. Apparently, he didn't even realize how sexist AXE's ads were until Wikipedia told him.

Outraged, Chris posted no less than two videos reasserting that he is completely straight and that AXE says right on the label that it is chemically formulated to attract women and only women, although he himself gets confused on this point several times. Chris by now seems to actually realize that it is wrong to simply demand that AXE's parent company, Unilever, ban sale of their products to homosexuals, but he has no problem angrily telling all gay people everywhere "Stay Off Our AXE, you Homos!"

In Part II of the video, Chris reads a letter he had hand-written to Unilever demanding a clearer instructions on the label about the intended medical use of AXE products. The second half was originally removed by YouTube (when it was a separate video) due to a violation, probably because someone complained about its encouragement of homophobic action.

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Address to Unilever About AXE
| image = {{#ev:youtube|uKQctHJ71hA}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 2 May 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Homosn.png]] [[Homos]]
| previous = [[For My Sweetest Ivy]]
| next = [[MEOW]]
}}</center>

===Transcript of Part 1===

Good day, I wish to, uh, make an announcement, uh, upon the side note, uh, aside from my usual work blagh would like to, uh, blagh make a claim, uh, make it obvious of to the creators of, uh, my favorite br- one of my favorite brand of, uh, body spray: AXE. [Presents AXE spray] Apparently it ha- it has come to my attention that, uh, bunch of, uh, people of the, uh, wrong orientation are, uh, using the, uh, AXE brand, ah, by which I mean particularly the, uh, homosexuals.

Eh eweh thusly a stereotype has been, uh, m- has been made if you, uh, if, has been made apparently, uh, has been made apparently '''‘you be gay if you wore AXE.’''' That’s so stupid it’s not I mean it’s not true I mean I’m straight and I have been using AXE for years. [Presents AXE again] I’m a proud sub- I’m a proud user of AXE ‘cos originally as it was originally intended for and I quote: [Reading label] “Effective deodorant protection designed to seduce the ladies” and then later, uh, when they expanded to, uh, the, uh, shower gel they continued with that in saying, uh, “ah kee—dr—kee—nahh let’s see. Hydrates your skin leavin’ it so pure that she’ll th—that ''she-ll'' think ''she’s'' the first one to touch it,” and then later again in, uh, shampoo it says here [Reading label] “Get girl approved hair. Wash, attract, repeat.”

Even though, uh, the comments, the, uh, comments, uh, sound, uh, sexist, uh, as I have learned, uh, on, uh, on their page on Wikipedia [gasp] I still feel that, uh, I have been at, uh, I still feel that, uh, is, uh, a big, uh, a big misuse and complete immoral act that the homosexuals take use of our of the AXE brand which is prefer- which is dimensionally and originally oriented towards the straight people. I mean men attract ladies. It means they’re straight. They want to attract the ladies they’re straight. Please, okay, that didn’t come out right but my point is anyway, uh, AXE is more straight is more meant for straight people: straight men who wish to attract the straight, nyell, the ladies.

The straight men who wish to attract the ladies and I have been the proud us—prow user of AXE throughout the many bre—throughout the many, uh, variations, ehmore to come and more out there to [stuttering] out there to market and I’m sure, other than the body spray, the ehshower gel and the shampoo. In any case, AXE was adridgionally meant for, and should remain, only for the straight men who wish to attract the women. It is not meant for a homosexual dude to attract another homosexual dude. Ahem. Ticks me off. It really does.

So I hope that, uh, the aff—that the, uh, Unilever the company that creates the AXE products, uh, sees this, uh, video on the YouTube and also, uh, would like also, uh, I would like t- to, uh, well I’d be say— I'd be, uh, I would be sound like, uh, some kind of bad person if I tell 'em to not sell to the homosexuals but I wa—but it should be more obvious from the package that it is meant for straight people. Y'know and also I would like to make the following statement to all homosexuals who dare use it. '''You homosexuals, stay off of our AXE!'''

Peace out.

===Transcript of Part 2===

I wish to, uh, take a moment right now to, uh, read a letter I have just hand-written for the, uh, Unilever company about the, uh, issue at hand with AXE. I read this out loud because I currently cannot find the snail mail address, but when I do I will mail it off directly. But I re—but I read it now for hope that they will at least be able to get the—get the understanding and the gist of my, uh, of my proposition and hopefully do something about it and will not blow me off because of an opinion.

Hmmm. Anyway, to the Unilever company who creates, uh, AXE body spray, shower gel, shampoo, and all of that.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I, Christian Weston Chandler, have been a loyal user of AXE body spray for years now, and I have been enjoying the scent as I look forward to it making me smell better to attract (and keep one of) women to be my sweetheart. I have been sussessful with being enjoyed by my sweetheart—[''looks up to camera''] my sweetest [[Ivy]]. [''continues'']—who enjoys my pleasant presence and company with her.

I write the letter today, with concern of hearing that the '''ho-mo-sess-u-al pop-u-la-tion''' wear the AXE body spray as often as or greater than the straight people. Like myself. For the longest time, AXE has been advertised and meant for STRAIGHT men to attract WOMEN. It was certainly NOT meant to attract... '''other dudes'''.

I would like—I would ask to ban sale of—and use of the product from the homos, ''but that would be [[Chris|retarded]]''. Instead I respectfully and humbly request that on the package a statement li—such as "DESIGNED ONLY FOR STRAIGHT ORIENTED MEN" or something strongly similar. Please make this so, and please do not try to blow me off for having an opinion about the product. Or having an opinion about the homosexuals. Because I do not care much about them.

Sincerely, 
Christian Weston Chandler 
Proud Straight Male AXE User

Peace.

==See also==

[[Axe]] - The deodorant of choice for [[Chris]] and [[homos | homosexuals]].

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[For My Sweetest Ivy]]|nextlink=[[MEOW]]|}}
{{Videos}}

[[Category:Homos]]

For My Sweetest Ivy

2010-01-05T04:49:03Z

Joson: /* Video */

{{quote| I look forward to the eventuality of, uh, you and me having our sex time together.|Chris.}}

{{quote| Thank you for giving me another colorful character to see in my nightmares.|'Lauren', WBCN listener and resident of Bostonia.}}

On 1 [[May 2009]], Chris sends a message to [[Ivy]] promising smoothies, ''Gilligan's Island'', ''[[Family Guy]]'', masses of porn-based [[sex]], ''[[Guitar Hero]]'', a romantic walk through the [[Fashion Square Mall|mall]] and many places with "green and sunlight" for the [[Crass and Champ|hermit crabs]]. On May 12th, this video was discussed on [http://www.wbcn.com/topic/play_window.php?audioType=Episode&audioId=3705145 the morning show of Boston radio station WBCN]. During the radio show, several normal, unenlightened people discuss how much of a creepy fuck Chris is. Notice that no matter how much the [[DJ Jamsta|DJ]] tries to warp Chris's voice, the original is still the most disturbing.

Chris, for whatever reason, has elected to wear an actual suit for this video. The orange shirt he is wearing suggests this is the outfit he had in mind drawing himself at his [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|wedding]] and [[Giant Penis Comic|honeymoon]]. Whether it's the slimming effect of black or the fact that he's in clothing other human beings might ever consider wearing, Chris actually looks presentable, at least by [[Chris and fashion|usual standards]]. Unfortunately, he then ruins the effect by speaking.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = For My Sweetest Ivy
| image = {{#ev:youtube|nBUzZowEt1E}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 1 May 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Sexn.png]] [[Sex]]
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| previous = [[ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain]]
| next = [[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

Hey [[Ivy]]! I'm doing this video for yoooou. Oh, we are gonna have so much ''fun together'' when you and I are together! Hmmm! You know, '''my [[Barbara Chandler|mommy]] and''' I--my, my family and I will come and meet you at the airport. And you know, your choice so--take you to your hotel or, uh, bring you back to...my house, hmmm. I mean, uh, you know, we'd be hanging around so much and sharing so many fondful memories.

Hmm. And you know, I few--I know a few good places in [[Charlottesville]], you know, I think it's, you know, I'll take you there, we'll get some good things to eeeeeat, and we’ll hang ooouut. We’ll have so much fun. We’ll, uh, have a good time together, you know. I know a place that serves some great smoothies. Uh, yeah, the cafe, in Charlottesville. Good place. Serves good smoothies! And you know, we can enjoy a movie in the theater, or in--at home, or watch a television rerun. ''[[Family Guy]]''! Heh. ''Family Guy''! Or, uh, [[I Love Lucy]] or I got some—I got the entire series of ''Gilligan's Island'', hmmm. Hoo-hoo! Hmm, and we can make some music together on ''[[Guitar Hero]]''. Hmmm. Well, you can sing, I got a microphone. I'm thinking about getting drums. [''Makes a drum sound'']

Hmmm, yeah. And you know, I will see you in the--I look forward to the eventuality of, uh, you and me having our sex time together. Hmmm, I'll do you so many--I'll—-I’ll do my best to pleasure you and keep you satisfied, my sweetest Ivy, just for you. ''Just for you!'' Hmmm! I know a number of good positions and massages, hmm. Hmmm. And, you know, I know a number, uh, places we could walk around at, you know. We could walk about the mall! We could walk about the [[University of Virginia|UVA]] grounds! Good places where there's plenty of green and sunlight.

Hmm, and wa--we can walk the [[Crass and Champ|hermit crabs]] together, hmm, talkin’ about—somethin’ like, how you might like to--how you might walk your hermit crabs, hmmmm. Hmmmm, so, you know, wonderful memories! Wonderful memories! We're gonna have lots of fun. We’re gon--I'll do my best--I'll do my best to keep you entertained, show you a good time, when we're having a good time. And I promise, I’ll remain your good boy forever and for always. And to get, uh, my friends up I've been talking to uh, between on the Internet, and in real life--my real friends, they can vouch for me on, uh, how good a boy I have been. Being a good boy just for you, Ivy. I love you so much, I love you so muuuuch! [''Pretends to hug her''] Hmmmm. Hmmm, look at me smile, hmm. It's a nice smile. Because I love you, Ivy! I love you so much. I ran out of details. [''Laughs''] I don't know. I guess I'll sing you a song.

[''Sings a variation of [[Wikipedia:Jolly Holiday|"Jolly Holiday"]] from ''[[Mary Poppins]]'', attempting to imitate Dick Van Dyke's cockney accent'']

It's a jolly ‘oliday 
With Ivy 
Ivy makes my heart so light 
When the skies are grey 
And ordinary 
Ivy makes the sun shine bright. 
Oh, happiness is blooming 
All around ‘er 
The daffodils are smiling 
At the doves 
When Ivy holds my hand 
I feel so grand 
My 'eart starts beating 
Like a big brass band! 

[''Mimes waving his hat over his head as he sinks to the floor, with his Playstation controller as the hat'']

It's a jolly holiday with Ivy 
No wonder that it's Ivy that I love. 

You know something else, I should have uh, thought of--of doing this before, you know, to feel more positive, highlight for anybody who, uh, goes back on information. I should recreate, uh, something for [[MySpace]] or [[Facebook]] with all the positive highlights and all the true details that would not, uh, be, uh, somehow twisted in any erroneous way. I'll work on that. I will work on that. Because it's [[lie|the honest truth from my head]]. From my head. I love you so much Ivy. I love you! I love youuu. [''Blows a kiss to the camera''] Talk to you later, [[sweetheart]].

[''Jump cut'']

And also to your [[Keino|father]] the [[jerkops|policeman]], I salute him with my [[Wikipedia:Scout_sign_and_salute#Cub_Scouts.27_two-finger_salute|Cub Scout salute]] that I have favored for so long.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain]]|nextlink=[[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]]|}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain

2010-01-05T04:39:48Z

Joson:

'''ShutUpBrain''' and '''WakeUpBrain''' are two rather peculiar videos that [[Chris]] uploaded to [[YouTube]] on [[2009#April|30 April 2009]].

The true and original origin and meaning of these videos is yet to be made clear. For some time before releasing the video the manchild had been raving about how [[Ivy]] had corrected his [[biological clock|sleep cycle]], so it's possible that the videos are Christian portraying what it is like to be sleep-deprived during the daytime and insomniac at night. If true, Chris apparently blames his nocturnal habits on a combination of [[autism]] and/or [[stress]], to the shock of approximately no one.

It should be noted that he says "Wake up!" in the Shut up video, and "Shut up!" in the Wake up video. This could be evidence that his brain is just broken.

==ShutUpBrain==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = ShutUpBrain
| image = {{#ev:youtube|01Fdl5qi9MM}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 30 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy
| previous = [[CWC Update 29 April 2009]]
| next = [[ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain#WakeUpBrain|Wake Up Brain]]
}}</center>

{{quote|Shut up, brain! Just shut up!}}

===Transcript===

''Hey!'' ''You're keeping me awake at night!'' ''What are you doing keeping me awake?'' Just ''shut up!'' Shut up! Don't make me stay awake!

I'm supposed to fall asleep! I need to be in dream land!

Wake up! Shut up! Shut up!

Shut up! Shut up, brain! Just shut up!

Shut up, or I'll ''make'' you shut up!

Shut up!

''SHUT UUUPPP!'' Shut up! ''SHUT UP!''

''Shut uuuuuuuuuppp!''

Sh'up!

==WakeUpBrain==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = ShutUpBrain
| image = {{#ev:youtube|iKj8CKGAWcQ}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 30 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy
| previous = [[ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain#ShutUpBrain|Shut Up Brain]]
| next = [[For My Sweetest Ivy]]
}}</center>

{{quote|Wake up! Wakeupwakeupwakeupwakeup!}}

===Transcript===

Wake up! [''smacks himself in the head repeatedly''] Wake up, brain!

You're supposed to be thinking for me! Hey! [''smacks himself in the head''] I need you to give me some thoughts to-- some rational thoughts… for the situation that's at hand. C'mon, brain, wake up!

[''smacks himself in the head'']

Quit fallin’ asleep on me! You always get-- you always… get me in a bad situ-- you always put me in an awful situation when you… fall asleep on me. Wake up! [''smacks himself in the head again''] C'mon, wake up!

[''smacks himself in the head repeatedly'']

You'd better wake up, or I'm gonna g-- accidentally give myself amnesia one of these moments!

[''smacks himself in the head repeatedly and groans''] Okay.

[''starts smacking himself in the head at the end of every sentence''] Wake up! Just stay awake! Stay awake! Don't fall asleep on me! Don't make me zone out. Shut up! Wake up! Wake up! Wakeupwakeupwakeupwakeup!

''Wake up!'' ''Wake uuuppp!''

Wake up.

Yeah, you don't need to… zone out when I get stressed out. Just… stay awake, okay? Stay awake. Wake up!

''WAKE UP!''

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 29 April 2009]]|nextlink=[[For My Sweetest Ivy]]|}}
{{Videos}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009

2010-01-05T04:27:46Z

Joson: /* Watch */

{{Honest}}

On 28 April 2009, [[Christian Weston Chandler]] posted two [[YouTube]] videos titled "'''ECV 00095'''" and "'''ECV 00096'''". In the first video he addresses the [[April 16 Fetish Vids|16 April release of video and pictures]] showing him drinking his own [[semen]], wearing [[butt garments|adult diapers]], and spanking himself. In addition, he admits that he frequently [[dirty crapped briefs|shits his pants]].

On 5 [[May 2009]], "ECV 00095" was linked on [http://www.fark.com/cgi/vidplayer.pl?IDLink=4369161 Fark], [http://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/8icda/the_creepiest_person_on_the_internet_has_been/ Reddit] and other popular sites, dramatically increasing the number of people who have seen Chris-chan [[fail]] on the Internet.

Chris was apparently motivated to make "ECV 00095" when he was told that a little girl named [[Ching Chong]] saw the aforementioned sex acts on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. He spends much of this first video explaining why it's natural to be a cum-guzzling, self-flagellating, incontinent camwhore. At the same time, he struggles to reassure the viewer of his mental health. Near the end he seems to decide he cannot adequately account for his actions without confessing that he only produced the videos and pictures for the erotic pleasure of an "anonymous female individual".

Within an hour of posting "ECV 00095", Chris followed up with "ECV 00096". In this video, he admits what was already obvious: that the woman for whom he made the sex videos is [[Ivy]]. Chris seems thoroughly convinced that the more he can establish that the fetish footage was made at the behest of a real woman, the more acceptable it will become.

Perhaps realizing that these circumstances point to the (true) conclusion that Ivy is a [[troll]] deceiving him into embarrassing himself on the Internet, Chris spends much of the second video defensively insisting that Ivy is a real person, that they are going to lose their virginity together, "and it's going to be awesome."

The video was discussed on several radio shows, including the nationally syndicated Sirius and XM Radio show Opie and Anthony.

==Watch==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|FomKwM7rQw8}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 28 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Reason.png]] Reason
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Horizontal Red Shirt
| previous = [[CWCFlyingElephants]]
| next = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009#Additional material|ECV 00096]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''displays [[high school ring]] of truthiness'']

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate, uh [''shows ring again''], April 28th, 2009.

Uhh. It has come to my attention that, uh, [[April 16 Fetish Vids|certain videooos]] of the, uh, naughty nature have been disco—have been leaked to the trolls and they have been added to the ED page, and I want to talk a little bit about, uh, the subject matter of three videos.

You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''[[semen|navy]]''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do [[mass debate|masturbate]]—I'm not ashamed to admit it—as a lot of guys, I'm sure, have done the same thing in their time. Anyway, uh, basically I—yeah, into [[fapcup|the cup]] and—yeah, I recycle it. So that that way I won't lose any, uh, [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|unborn children]]. So then I can—then I can also still have a good number of...—a good semen count. Keep maintain that by recycling it. And depending on the taste of it, uh, to the original owners... of the—their respective semen, uh, it's a good idea to recycle, but if, uh, you don—if you don—if you feel uncomfortable, uh, doing it or it tastes bad to you, then, uh, then you don't have to do it.

Anyway, the—anyway, af—from after that the, uh, second topic, the, uh, one where I spanked myself. Yeah, I just, uh, I was doin' that for fun, because sometimes I do my [[random access humor|random, silly, crazy things]], and, uh... [''sighs''] ''sometimes'' adult feel pleasure from pain, even when they, uh, do it to themselves. But I mean, I'm n—I mean, n—I mean, not to a point where they kill themselves, but I mean, uh, just, like, you know, spanking is a generally a pop—generally a popular type, uh, thing amongst adults. Hm. But anyway, it's a—it's a fetish for some people, and I just randomly felt like doing that.

And then the, uh, third topic which was the—uh, the—uh, the photographs of, uh, me [[butt garments|a... dult diapers]]. Uhhhh, yes, I did, uh, get a free sampling of diapers from a troll, but, regalry—legularly I, uh, do not use them, but I just felt like trying a pair on. And it was okay. Not—not a big deal; it's just, uh...—but, y'know, I wouldn't—I would not wear them on a daily basis I wear ''briefs''. I wear regular briefs. And sometimes I do, uh, I get very stressed out from, uh, people who yell at me or, uh, misunderstand me or talk bad about me. And, and, between that and other real-life stresses, uh, it just pen—it just builds up and sometimes, uh, it just—I just have to—it just comes out, and I sometimes accidentally, uh... [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|poo my pants]]. But I mean, who hasn't in their lifetime, I mean, pooed their childhood diapers, much less pooed their... underwear at least once in their lifetime. I mean, we're only human. Nothing to be ashamed of. And to those who find it amusing, uh, I respectfully disagree with their opinions.

And, uh, with that—

[''jump cut'']

[[Image:SchuComicSP3P6.jpg|thumb|right|'''GUESS CHRISTIAN'S FETISH NOW!''']]
I just want to continue to make it perfectly clear that I am a healthy, growing, sane, and sound-minded, uh, adult individual.

[''jump cut'']

And I should continue to be treated and respected as an equal among the human population just as anybody else. Private matters are private matters.

[''jump cut'']

But, uh, also, I—in reality I actually did those, uh, videos and pictures as a favor to, uh, an individ—as a favor to a... to an anon—to an [[Ivy|anomynous female individual]] (sic) who just wanted to get her kicks off of it. But you know, a lot of women, they, uh, tend to get their kicks off of kinky things as such. An adult fetish, nothing to be ashamed of. I mean, everybody's got at least one, I'm sure. I have some. I'm not exactly sure how exactly to describe them, but yes, I have some, and I'm not afraid to admit it.

Thank you very much for your time and, uh, have a pleasant day. Peace.
 

==Additional material==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00096
| image = {{#ev:youtube|8wff4-9KmHw}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 28 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Reason.png]] Reason
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Horizontal Red Shirt
| previous = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009#Watch|Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]
| next = [[CWC Update 29 April 2009]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

This is a video that goes in addition to the one I have recently posted.
[[Image:LoseOurVirginies.jpg|thumb|right|By "awesome" he means "a mental scarring experience"]]
The anonymous person of mine was—uh... that I did the videos for originally... yeah, yeah. It was for Ivy. I was trying to respect her decision of, uh, not revealing her name, but, uh, it didn't work out so she agreed—so, she asked me to, uh, just go ahead and let y'all know about that.

But anyway, Ivy is not a troll. She is real. She is true. And she is my sweetheart. We are going to be together in the near future and we are going to have sex. We're going to lose our virginities to each other... and it's going to be awesome.

And, just so you know, the, uh, previous video was also dedicated to a little girl, who accidentally found the ED page. Her name was [[Ching Chong]].

That's it. That's it.

Ivy is real! ''We are going to be together!'' ''Foreverrr!''

I can feel the cosmos!

Peace.

[[Image:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|center]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWCFlyingElephants]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 29 April 2009]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}
[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-28]]

Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009

2010-01-05T04:26:00Z

Joson:

{{Honest}}

On 28 April 2009, [[Christian Weston Chandler]] posted two [[YouTube]] videos titled "'''ECV 00095'''" and "'''ECV 00096'''". In the first video he addresses the [[April 16 Fetish Vids|16 April release of video and pictures]] showing him drinking his own [[semen]], wearing [[butt garments|adult diapers]], and spanking himself. In addition, he admits that he frequently [[dirty crapped briefs|shits his pants]].

On 5 [[May 2009]], "ECV 00095" was linked on [http://www.fark.com/cgi/vidplayer.pl?IDLink=4369161 Fark], [http://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/8icda/the_creepiest_person_on_the_internet_has_been/ Reddit] and other popular sites, dramatically increasing the number of people who have seen Chris-chan [[fail]] on the Internet.

Chris was apparently motivated to make "ECV 00095" when he was told that a little girl named [[Ching Chong]] saw the aforementioned sex acts on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. He spends much of this first video explaining why it's natural to be a cum-guzzling, self-flagellating, incontinent camwhore. At the same time, he struggles to reassure the viewer of his mental health. Near the end he seems to decide he cannot adequately account for his actions without confessing that he only produced the videos and pictures for the erotic pleasure of an "anonymous female individual".

Within an hour of posting "ECV 00095", Chris followed up with "ECV 00096". In this video, he admits what was already obvious: that the woman for whom he made the sex videos is [[Ivy]]. Chris seems thoroughly convinced that the more he can establish that the fetish footage was made at the behest of a real woman, the more acceptable it will become.

Perhaps realizing that these circumstances point to the (true) conclusion that Ivy is a [[troll]] deceiving him into embarrassing himself on the Internet, Chris spends much of the second video defensively insisting that Ivy is a real person, that they are going to lose their virginity together, "and it's going to be awesome."

The video was discussed on several radio shows, including the nationally syndicated Sirius and XM Radio show Opie and Anthony.

==Watch==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|FomKwM7rQw8}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 28 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Reason.png]] Reason
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Horizontal Red Shirt
| previous = [[CWCFlyingElephants]]
| next = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009#Additional material|ECV 00096]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''displays [[high school ring]] of truthiness'']

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate, uh [''shows ring again''], April 28th, 2009.

Uhh. It has come to my attention that, uh, [[April 16 Fetish Vids|certain videooos]] of the, uh, naughty nature have been disco—have been leaked to the trolls and they have been added to the ED page, and I want to talk a little bit about, uh, the subject matter of three videos.

You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''[[semen|navy]]''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do [[mass debate|masturbate]]—I'm not ashamed to admit it—as a lot of guys, I'm sure, have done the same thing in their time. Anyway, uh, basically I—yeah, into [[fapcup|the cup]] and—yeah, I recycle it. So that that way I won't lose any, uh, [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|unborn children]]. So then I can—then I can also still have a good number of...—a good semen count. Keep maintain that by recycling it. And depending on the taste of it, uh, to the original owners... of the—their respective semen, uh, it's a good idea to recycle, but if, uh, you don—if you don—if you feel uncomfortable, uh, doing it or it tastes bad to you, then, uh, then you don't have to do it.

Anyway, the—anyway, af—from after that the, uh, second topic, the, uh, one where I spanked myself. Yeah, I just, uh, I was doin' that for fun, because sometimes I do my [[random access humor|random, silly, crazy things]], and, uh... [''sighs''] ''sometimes'' adult feel pleasure from pain, even when they, uh, do it to themselves. But I mean, I'm n—I mean, n—I mean, not to a point where they kill themselves, but I mean, uh, just, like, you know, spanking is a generally a pop—generally a popular type, uh, thing amongst adults. Hm. But anyway, it's a—it's a fetish for some people, and I just randomly felt like doing that.

And then the, uh, third topic which was the—uh, the—uh, the photographs of, uh, me [[butt garments|a... dult diapers]]. Uhhhh, yes, I did, uh, get a free sampling of diapers from a troll, but, regalry—legularly I, uh, do not use them, but I just felt like trying a pair on. And it was okay. Not—not a big deal; it's just, uh...—but, y'know, I wouldn't—I would not wear them on a daily basis I wear ''briefs''. I wear regular briefs. And sometimes I do, uh, I get very stressed out from, uh, people who yell at me or, uh, misunderstand me or talk bad about me. And, and, between that and other real-life stresses, uh, it just pen—it just builds up and sometimes, uh, it just—I just have to—it just comes out, and I sometimes accidentally, uh... [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|poo my pants]]. But I mean, who hasn't in their lifetime, I mean, pooed their childhood diapers, much less pooed their... underwear at least once in their lifetime. I mean, we're only human. Nothing to be ashamed of. And to those who find it amusing, uh, I respectfully disagree with their opinions.

And, uh, with that—

[''jump cut'']

[[Image:SchuComicSP3P6.jpg|thumb|right|'''GUESS CHRISTIAN'S FETISH NOW!''']]
I just want to continue to make it perfectly clear that I am a healthy, growing, sane, and sound-minded, uh, adult individual.

[''jump cut'']

And I should continue to be treated and respected as an equal among the human population just as anybody else. Private matters are private matters.

[''jump cut'']

But, uh, also, I—in reality I actually did those, uh, videos and pictures as a favor to, uh, an individ—as a favor to a... to an anon—to an [[Ivy|anomynous female individual]] (sic) who just wanted to get her kicks off of it. But you know, a lot of women, they, uh, tend to get their kicks off of kinky things as such. An adult fetish, nothing to be ashamed of. I mean, everybody's got at least one, I'm sure. I have some. I'm not exactly sure how exactly to describe them, but yes, I have some, and I'm not afraid to admit it.

Thank you very much for your time and, uh, have a pleasant day. Peace.
 

==Additional material==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00096
| image = {{#ev:youtube|8wff4-9KmHw}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 28 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Reason.png]] Reason
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Horizontal Red Shirt
| previous = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009#Watch|Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]
| next = [[CWC Update 29 April 2009]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

This is a video that goes in addition to the one I have recently posted.
[[Image:LoseOurVirginies.jpg|thumb|right|By "awesome" he means "a mental scarring experience"]]
The anonymous person of mine was—uh... that I did the videos for originally... yeah, yeah. It was for Ivy. I was trying to respect her decision of, uh, not revealing her name, but, uh, it didn't work out so she agreed—so, she asked me to, uh, just go ahead and let y'all know about that.

But anyway, Ivy is not a troll. She is real. She is true. And she is my sweetheart. We are going to be together in the near future and we are going to have sex. We're going to lose our virginities to each other... and it's going to be awesome.

And, just so you know, the, uh, previous video was also dedicated to a little girl, who accidentally found the ED page. Her name was [[Ching Chong]].

That's it. That's it.

Ivy is real! ''We are going to be together!'' ''Foreverrr!''

I can feel the cosmos!

Peace.

[[Image:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|center]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWCFlyingElephants]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 29 April 2009]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}
[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-28]]

CWCFlyingElephants

2010-01-05T04:09:56Z

Joson: /* Audio Version */

{{Honest}}
[[Image:Cwcspin.gif|right|frame|This video, quite clearly indeed, shows Chris's horrendous man-ass.]]
"'''CWCFlyingElephants'''" is a seven minute video, published by [[The Miscreants]] on [[2009#April|April 27, 2009]]. Trying to cheer his then-[[sweetheart]] [[Vanessa Hudgens]], it shows [[Chris]] in his room, naked, displaying a show of what he calls [[random-access humor]]. Much like a typical three year old, Chris runs, twirls, acts loony, and does headstands while in the [[nudes|nude]]. In addition, he [[parody|imitates]] lines from the cartoon show ''[[Wikipedia:Ed, Edd, n' Eddy|Ed, Edd, n' Eddy]]'', quotes ''[[Monty Python]]'', plays with toys, and throws around [[Lil' Chris]]. It's quite a sight...
==Videos==
===Censored Version===
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWCFlyingElephants Censored
| image = {{#ev:youtube|p8Kx9kbeNto}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 27 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy
| Other = [[Image:Leaked.png]] Leaked
| previous = [[Power]]
| next = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]
}}</center>
===Audio Version===
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWCFlyingElephants Audio
| image = {{#ev:youtube|ooT5gK3Cjqk}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 27 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy
| Other = [[Image:Leaked.png]] Leaked
| previous = [[Power]]
| next = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
And now for somecummpentydifferent. BUUUUNG! And now it's [[Monty Python]]'s flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I dont know, [[Gregg Mays|Greeg]], why is people running away. Johan! Johan, why is people running away? I don't know Johan! Greeg! Johan! Johan! Why is people running away? I don't know, buddy Greeg. Johan! Johan, why is people running away? I dont know, Greeg. Johan, Johan, why is people running away? SHUT UP! You're driving me crazy!

AAAAAAAAGH! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! Hm!

It's a trap! HNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG!

And now for something completely different, a man impersonating Towelie the Towel. Oh my goodness, my pussy is wet! Don't forget to bring a towel! What? When your pussy is wet, and you don't want to lose a bet, you want to dry yourself up right away. That's why Towelie says: don't forget to bring a towel! Wanna get high? NOOOOO! NOOO!

I would like to meet someone of [[Autism|severe intelligence]]. I would like to hear the sound of two bricks being smashed together. I would like to see ten million stupid monkeys. I would like to see [[Chris and religion|John the Baptist]] impersonation of Graham [[Jimmy Hill|Hill]]. Yes it's historic impersonations!

Hvofonds ability. Yes I would do it. If it was valid. If the money was valid. I parted permisses society! I've heard of you in a sense, but I've never had it. Shut up you're driving me crazy. AAAAAAAAAGH!

I'm a woodpecker! 'Cept with dirt!<ref>Originally said by Ed; originated from [[Wikipedia:Ed, Edd 'n Eddy|Ed, Edd 'n Eddy]] episode [http://www.tv.com/ed-edd-n-eddy/stop-look-ed/episode/123292/summary.html "Stop, Look, Ed"]</ref>

Get out of my head! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HLOO!

And now for something completely different. Bebelapdapbambalamba. Bebelabadapbambajamba-[[Transformers|Bumblebeeee]]! Buzzing around. Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Really, [[Transformers|Prowl]]. And how necessary is that side-car. Just so you can wear the helmet of your past mastaaaaaar! Come here. [[Transformers|Soundwave]]. Lend me Laserbeak!

DIIII DIIII DIIII DIIII More than a feeling-

I like a nice dance in forstue. Otherwise, who said that? Who said that? Who said that? Anywaaay. Who said that? There will now be a short intermission, during which small ice-creams and large boxes will be served in the commissary. Another way to drive people away from the theater is to show a turfs-dispenser. Fzzzs. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun.

[[White knight|Pearls before swine]] presents! The like. Do you like this model, or how about this model? I'll give you a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|karate-kick]] for your money. I'll give you a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|punch]], and a whiz-bang, and a boom! All you got to do is come down here.

[''[[Donald Duck impersonation|Donald Duck impression]]''] Oh my gosh, look at me! I'm [[Nudes|naked]]! I forgot my [[Sailor Moon|sailor suit]], and my [[Clown Doll|hat]], and [[Duck|apparatus]]. I don't know, but I guess. Here's what I have to do. Here's my clothes. Bwaa. I went out of the cartoon.

Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Excuse me, what did you say? Hmmph, rmmph.

Hey [[South Park|Kenny]], you get out here, you take off that stupid little orange or blue jacket, or whatever the hell color it is you wear, and talk to people like you every real life, don't just mumble your words.

Hey dude, that's not cool.

Yep. Yep. Yep. Mm-hm. <ref>Regularly used on [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_of_the_Hill "King of the Hill."] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22-HSjMS3Ks Here's an example.]</ref>

[''Drinks soda''] AAAAAAH!

Product placement, eh. Product placement in this program is hereby endorsed and provided by the studio, which is provided from the companies of which those products became, originated from, thereof. Another way we can drive people away from the studio is to [[Christian Weston Chandler|act. Like. A. Loony]]!

[[Random-access humor|I once knew a man from Nantucket, he has on his head, a silly bucket]]. And now I have on my head, a [[Li'l Chris|silly little bear]], I'm wearing [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|clean underwear]]. Wearing clean underwear like I just don't care.

Wow, he just said what I said. I'm undecided!

HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! PFOOP!

[''Holds a [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|sock puppet]] up''] Hm, I guess he's done left the studio for now. Well, that's all folks.

Du du du du du du du du. Du du du du du du du du. [[Pedofork|Pedi]] pedi di di. Plong.

LILILILILILILILI! PLONK!

Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Moola moola moola. He must be asking for a handout. Indeed. And now it's the indeed show, starring [[Thurston Howell III|Mr. Thurston Howell, III]]. Indeed. Indeed.

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Random-access humor]]
*[[Monty Python]]
*[[I Got A Fish]]
*[[Bunny Hop]]
*[[Nudes]]

==External links==
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiJont1FhOw A sample of the madness]
* [http://www.slutload.com/watch/7hZAzJutuSx/Chris-chan-completely-different.html Watch CWCFlyingElephants]
* [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=6M64BNL1 Download CWCFlyingElephants]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Power]]|nextlink=[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]|}}
{{LeakedVideos}}

CWCFlyingElephants

2010-01-05T04:08:27Z

Joson: /* Videos */

{{Honest}}
[[Image:Cwcspin.gif|right|frame|This video, quite clearly indeed, shows Chris's horrendous man-ass.]]
"'''CWCFlyingElephants'''" is a seven minute video, published by [[The Miscreants]] on [[2009#April|April 27, 2009]]. Trying to cheer his then-[[sweetheart]] [[Vanessa Hudgens]], it shows [[Chris]] in his room, naked, displaying a show of what he calls [[random-access humor]]. Much like a typical three year old, Chris runs, twirls, acts loony, and does headstands while in the [[nudes|nude]]. In addition, he [[parody|imitates]] lines from the cartoon show ''[[Wikipedia:Ed, Edd, n' Eddy|Ed, Edd, n' Eddy]]'', quotes ''[[Monty Python]]'', plays with toys, and throws around [[Lil' Chris]]. It's quite a sight...
==Videos==
===Censored Version===
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWCFlyingElephants Censored
| image = {{#ev:youtube|p8Kx9kbeNto}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 27 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy
| Other = [[Image:Leaked.png]] Leaked
| previous = [[Power]]
| next = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]
}}</center>
===Audio Version===
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWCFlyingElephants Audio
| image = {{#ev:youtube|ooT5gK3Cjqk}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 27 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy
| Other = [[Image:Leaked.png]] Leaked
}}</center>
===Transcript===
And now for somecummpentydifferent. BUUUUNG! And now it's [[Monty Python]]'s flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I dont know, [[Gregg Mays|Greeg]], why is people running away. Johan! Johan, why is people running away? I don't know Johan! Greeg! Johan! Johan! Why is people running away? I don't know, buddy Greeg. Johan! Johan, why is people running away? I dont know, Greeg. Johan, Johan, why is people running away? SHUT UP! You're driving me crazy!

AAAAAAAAGH! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! Hm!

It's a trap! HNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG!

And now for something completely different, a man impersonating Towelie the Towel. Oh my goodness, my pussy is wet! Don't forget to bring a towel! What? When your pussy is wet, and you don't want to lose a bet, you want to dry yourself up right away. That's why Towelie says: don't forget to bring a towel! Wanna get high? NOOOOO! NOOO!

I would like to meet someone of [[Autism|severe intelligence]]. I would like to hear the sound of two bricks being smashed together. I would like to see ten million stupid monkeys. I would like to see [[Chris and religion|John the Baptist]] impersonation of Graham [[Jimmy Hill|Hill]]. Yes it's historic impersonations!

Hvofonds ability. Yes I would do it. If it was valid. If the money was valid. I parted permisses society! I've heard of you in a sense, but I've never had it. Shut up you're driving me crazy. AAAAAAAAAGH!

I'm a woodpecker! 'Cept with dirt!<ref>Originally said by Ed; originated from [[Wikipedia:Ed, Edd 'n Eddy|Ed, Edd 'n Eddy]] episode [http://www.tv.com/ed-edd-n-eddy/stop-look-ed/episode/123292/summary.html "Stop, Look, Ed"]</ref>

Get out of my head! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HLOO!

And now for something completely different. Bebelapdapbambalamba. Bebelabadapbambajamba-[[Transformers|Bumblebeeee]]! Buzzing around. Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Really, [[Transformers|Prowl]]. And how necessary is that side-car. Just so you can wear the helmet of your past mastaaaaaar! Come here. [[Transformers|Soundwave]]. Lend me Laserbeak!

DIIII DIIII DIIII DIIII More than a feeling-

I like a nice dance in forstue. Otherwise, who said that? Who said that? Who said that? Anywaaay. Who said that? There will now be a short intermission, during which small ice-creams and large boxes will be served in the commissary. Another way to drive people away from the theater is to show a turfs-dispenser. Fzzzs. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun.

[[White knight|Pearls before swine]] presents! The like. Do you like this model, or how about this model? I'll give you a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|karate-kick]] for your money. I'll give you a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|punch]], and a whiz-bang, and a boom! All you got to do is come down here.

[''[[Donald Duck impersonation|Donald Duck impression]]''] Oh my gosh, look at me! I'm [[Nudes|naked]]! I forgot my [[Sailor Moon|sailor suit]], and my [[Clown Doll|hat]], and [[Duck|apparatus]]. I don't know, but I guess. Here's what I have to do. Here's my clothes. Bwaa. I went out of the cartoon.

Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Excuse me, what did you say? Hmmph, rmmph.

Hey [[South Park|Kenny]], you get out here, you take off that stupid little orange or blue jacket, or whatever the hell color it is you wear, and talk to people like you every real life, don't just mumble your words.

Hey dude, that's not cool.

Yep. Yep. Yep. Mm-hm. <ref>Regularly used on [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_of_the_Hill "King of the Hill."] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22-HSjMS3Ks Here's an example.]</ref>

[''Drinks soda''] AAAAAAH!

Product placement, eh. Product placement in this program is hereby endorsed and provided by the studio, which is provided from the companies of which those products became, originated from, thereof. Another way we can drive people away from the studio is to [[Christian Weston Chandler|act. Like. A. Loony]]!

[[Random-access humor|I once knew a man from Nantucket, he has on his head, a silly bucket]]. And now I have on my head, a [[Li'l Chris|silly little bear]], I'm wearing [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|clean underwear]]. Wearing clean underwear like I just don't care.

Wow, he just said what I said. I'm undecided!

HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! PFOOP!

[''Holds a [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|sock puppet]] up''] Hm, I guess he's done left the studio for now. Well, that's all folks.

Du du du du du du du du. Du du du du du du du du. [[Pedofork|Pedi]] pedi di di. Plong.

LILILILILILILILI! PLONK!

Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Moola moola moola. He must be asking for a handout. Indeed. And now it's the indeed show, starring [[Thurston Howell III|Mr. Thurston Howell, III]]. Indeed. Indeed.

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Random-access humor]]
*[[Monty Python]]
*[[I Got A Fish]]
*[[Bunny Hop]]
*[[Nudes]]

==External links==
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiJont1FhOw A sample of the madness]
* [http://www.slutload.com/watch/7hZAzJutuSx/Chris-chan-completely-different.html Watch CWCFlyingElephants]
* [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=6M64BNL1 Download CWCFlyingElephants]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Power]]|nextlink=[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]|}}
{{LeakedVideos}}

Power

2010-01-05T03:24:08Z

Joson: /* Watch */

'''Power''' is a file, published by [[The Miscreants]], in which [[Chris]] performs various dubious feats of strength. The .zip includes three videos, an audio file and a "special thanks" document. It was published along with [[CWCFlyingElephants]] on 27 [[April 2009]].

==Watch==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Power
| image = {{#ev:youtube|TREWHpjD2Rc}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 27 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Comedy.png]] [[Random-access humor|Comedy]]
| Other = [[Image:Leaked.png]] Leaked
| previous = [[I Got A Fish]]
| next = [[CWCFlyingElephants]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===
[[Image:He-Chan.jpg|thumb|right|BY THE POWER OF NUMBSKULL!]]
StrongCWC1
'''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY WRATH!!''' [''retarded "solo"'']

StrongCWC2
We will now be watching the strong man, lifting a '''very heavy''' ''office chair''. Note: the chair weights a ''grand'' number of ''pounds''.

[''lifts the chair with considerable effort'']
Ahhhhh! Ta-da! '''FEEL MY WRATH!!''' [''puts the chair back down'']

StrongCWCPower
Now we will be seeing the strong man lifting ''the same chair'', but with a '''very heavy''' basket full of junk in the chair.

[''struggles to lift the chair, spills a good portion of what appears to be books in the process'']
'''HHHNGG [[random access humor|I ONCE KNEW A MAN FROM NANTUCKET!!''']] [''puts the chair back down'']

==See also==
* [[CWCFlyingElephants]]
* [[Clyde is Weaker than Water‎]]
* [[CWC 30 Push Ups]]
* [[I AM STRONG]]
* [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|I'LL SEND EVERYTHING IN MY '''POWER!''']]
* [[Prower]]

==External links==
* [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=Q0VPMWR1 Download Power]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I Got A Fish]]|nextlink=[[CWCFlyingElephants]]|}}
{{LeakedVideos}}

[[Category:Trolling]]

I Got A Fish

2010-01-05T03:19:09Z

Joson: /* Video */

In the '''I Got A Fish''' video, [[Chris]] jog-dances in place while a stupid song full of [[random access humor]] that he made up plays in the background. Despite his claims, he does not actually have a fish.

Chris may have been inspired by an old European fairy tale, "The Fisherman and His Wife," wherein the fisherman of the title is granted a wish in return for sparing the life of a magical fish. (The story was collected in the early 19th century by the Brothers Grimm, and not long afterward inspired a famous Russian poem by Alexander Pushkin.) Alternatively, he might just be dishing out random gibberish as usual.

The video is so bizarre and stupid that [http://www.wbcn.com/topic/play_window.php?audioType=Episode&audioId=3705145 the fucking ''media'' got in on it]. It's just the radio, but Chris's [[fail]] cannot stay contained for much longer.

{{quote|Welcome to the David Lynch movie. | WBCN, hitting the nail on the head.}}

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = I Got A Fish
| image = {{#ev:youtube|6DDOeNMWBQk}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 27 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Music.png]] Music
| Performance Style = [[Image:Comedy.png]] [[Random-access humor|Comedy]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Classicshirt.png]] Classic Shirt
| previous = [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]
| next = [[Power]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''song is delivered via voice-over as Chris mutely jog-dances in place'']

I got a fish! 
Would ya like to make a wish?

I got a fish! 
Would ya like to make a wish?

I got a ''fiiiiiiiiish!'' [''spreads arms wide to accompany wobbly falsetto''] 
Would ya like to make a ''wish?'' [''poses like a [[homo]]'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]|nextlink=[[Power]]|}}
{{Music Videos}}

[[category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Chris Calls Clyde Out

2010-01-05T03:03:03Z

Joson: /* Video */

On 23 [[April 2009]], after a nearly week-long silence, [[Chris]] finally speaks up again in '''Chris Calls Clyde Out'''. This time, he's calling out [[Clyde Cash]]. While this video begins like another [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|rage-fest]], we quickly see that [[Chris]] has gotten even more desperate. What follows is incomprehensible whining somehow directed as an insult to Clyde using racist Asian stereotypes showing everybody that he has no idea what a [[Wikipedia:Guido_(slang)|Guido]] is. Supposedly, this belief seems to have originated from a [[Mumble 3|Mumble chat with Julie]] that occurred a few months prior. [[Trolls|Scientists]] have yet to discover how [[Bunny Hop|public humiliation]] offends your enemies. Regardless, it provides for an ear-shattering two minutes.

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris Calls Clyde Out
| image = {{#ev:youtube|w8LZmZRmzQM}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 31 December 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]]
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga
| previous = [[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]
| next = [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

Hello, [[Clyde Cash|Mr Clyde]]. I have a bit of a message for you [sic] response to one you sent to me recently. ''[pauses, raises eyebrows]'' Yeah. Basically this is the impression ''I'' got from your message.

Oh, look at me! I feel like a silly man! Look at me, my eyes? Don't look at my silly walk, look at my sill-nee-nyeh! I am the troll. I should be so trolly. I should be trolly. Yes, ah-gah-dyeeeh! Look at mee! I've got an eyelid strip thing, beblehbebeblehh! I could be more laaame! You want me to be more lyaaame? Everyone laaame! [[South Park|I built this City (shitty) Wall and City Wok]]. Look at my silly walk! [''moves like a penguin''] Eeee!

[''jump cut'']

Oh, you forgot my silly walk?! See my [[South Park|City Wall]]? I give you a kick in the head. Hiyaa! [''Chris raises leg in view of camera''] And punch you in the face. Hiyaaa! I throw something at you, pyooo! BIIIM! [''camera falls over'']

[''jump cut'']

And you know what else, I throw something else at you. Hiyaa! [''Camera falls over''] Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''ANGRY'''! [''Chris grunts, growls, and looks a bit constipated, and then he roars at the camera up close and shakes his fists and PS3 controller''] I will call you out, Mr Cush! '''I AM CALLING YOU OUT'''! [''he holds his fist up to the camera and punches it'']

[''video cuts to a calmer Chris in a fighting sort of stance'']

Come on, trollman. Come out of your [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys COMEBACK|trollster's paradise]]. I'll give you a beatdown. [''waving fist at camera''] You don't like that? Well... tough cookies! [''Chris holds a thumb up to the camera sideways with a "psh" noise, and then he pauses and punches at it again with another "psh" noise'']

[''the video cuts again to Chris looking pleased with himself, and he appears to be about to say something, but decides against it'']

Well Clyde, I'll be calling you out. I know you're in my neck of the woods somewhere, so... just come right on out, and find me. [''flashes a victory sign''] Peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]|nextlink=[[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]|}}
{{Troll Videos}}

{{Clyde Saga}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-23]]

Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions

2010-01-05T03:00:59Z

Joson: /* Video */

{{quote|Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.| Matthew 5:27-30, King James Version Bible}}

"'''Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions'''" (officially "'''Matthew 5 27, CWC Confessions'''") is a video by [[Christian]], shot on 17 [[April 2009]]. It shows him apologizing to [[Ivy]] for cheating on her with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], as well as any sexual videos and pictures that the trolls found, with complete insincerity. It also shows Chris's difficulty in expressing human emotion like a normal person.

One notable fail is that Chris, as [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|before]], [[fail|fails]] at understanding the Bible. Chris interprets Matthew 5:27-30 as Jesus indicting literal adultery (a man being unfaithful to his wife) when Christ was clearly saying that ''any'' sort of impure thought (like, oh let's say, [[mass debating|masturbation]], consuming pornography, owning [[sex toys]], and a number of other things Chris does) is just as bad as committing actual adultery, to the point where it's better than gouge out eyes you use to look lustfully at a woman than to be cast into hell for those lustful thoughts. As Chris subscribes to the "The Bible says whatever I want it to say" school of thought, he does not consider this.

Chris appropriately apologizes at the end for all the [[nudes|horrible images he has unleashed upon the world]].

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions
| image = {{#ev:youtube|zjHynRccNxs}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 17 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Tragedy.png]] Tragedy
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| previous = [[I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy]]
| next = [[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]

}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''sighs''] [[Captain's Log]], uhh... April 17th, 2009.

I wish to, uh, commit to, uh... confess something, but, first, I would like to read a verse from the Bible: Matthew 5: verses 27 through 30. As quoted by Jesus, you have heard that it was said do not commit adultery, but I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her heart—in—with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out or throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown tin [sic] to Hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away, it is better for you to lose one part of your body than for a—your whole body to go—in—to Hell.

I have... sinned... and I have made a terrible mistake. I cheated on my sweetheart, [[Ivy]]. [''Chris takes off glasses and sighs''] The other day when I was talking to—uh, when I was chatting onl—chatting on instant message with, uh, [[Vanessa Hudgens|Vanessa]], she tried—she, uh, play—she plays with me, but to give me a—[''mumbles''] tell be about how she was playing with herself and whatnot and trying to make me—trying to turn me on, but for a while I resisted by talking about Ivy and my promises to her... and I just didn't know how to react, so eventually I caved in, and even though I was typing in "Vanessa" I... was actually shouting "Ivy". But the point is, I... cheated on h—I cheated on Ivy, and... I am so... sorry about that. [''inhales'']

I w—I repent, I wish to repent my sins, in a—in front of, uh, everyone who is watching this and incl—and especially my sweetest Ivy. [''sighs''] I care about you, Ivy. I bein—[''stutters''] I am truly blessed to have you in my life. Ohh, I'd have to be an idiot to ever want to run—run away from you or lose you. Ivy, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. I repent. [''Chris smacks himself in the forehead with his fist'']

[''sighs''] Ivy, I devote my heart and my soul and my virginity, everything, all that... is only for you. Not for any other person. Especially my gal-pals, any one of them. Only for my sweetest Ivy. I promise with all my heart. I care about you so much, Ivy.

And a-also, wanna bring up another thing that comes to my mind, uh. You t—the [[trolls]] are calling me and telling me that Ivy is a troll. She is not. Because I have heard her voice. I've heard her voice for over a month, and she is true, in her voice and in her heart. I know so. As I have guide—as I was guide [sic] by, uh, [[God and Jesus]]. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, Godjesus were mad at me, so, even though she r—even though she requested the recent items of question, sex...—[''quietly''] sexual stuff: videos and pictures, I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them. So, I repent for... any sexual video I uploaded in the past, or any... image that may—that have been taken from me, or, uh... I upload myself. In the name of all that is holy and good, please. Leave us alone, you f—trolls. Leave us alone. [[Lies|I have so much to live for]]... and I'd be a fool to lose Ivy, to... give up Ivy. I would never give her up. I love her so much, hand on my Bible.

Peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy]]|nextlink=[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-17]]

Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions

2010-01-05T02:58:53Z

Joson: /* Video */

{{quote|Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.| Matthew 5:27-30, King James Version Bible}}

"'''Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions'''" (officially "'''Matthew 5 27, CWC Confessions'''") is a video by [[Christian]], shot on 17 [[April 2009]]. It shows him apologizing to [[Ivy]] for cheating on her with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], as well as any sexual videos and pictures that the trolls found, with complete insincerity. It also shows Chris's difficulty in expressing human emotion like a normal person.

One notable fail is that Chris, as [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|before]], [[fail|fails]] at understanding the Bible. Chris interprets Matthew 5:27-30 as Jesus indicting literal adultery (a man being unfaithful to his wife) when Christ was clearly saying that ''any'' sort of impure thought (like, oh let's say, [[mass debating|masturbation]], consuming pornography, owning [[sex toys]], and a number of other things Chris does) is just as bad as committing actual adultery, to the point where it's better than gouge out eyes you use to look lustfully at a woman than to be cast into hell for those lustful thoughts. As Chris subscribes to the "The Bible says whatever I want it to say" school of thought, he does not consider this.

Chris appropriately apologizes at the end for all the [[nudes|horrible images he has unleashed upon the world]].

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions
| image = {{#ev:youtube|zjHynRccNxs}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 17 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Tragedy.png]] Tragedy
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| previous = [[I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy]]
| next = [[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]

}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''sighs''] [[Captain's Log]], uhh... April 17th, 2009.

I wish to, uh, commit to, uh... confess something, but, first, I would like to read a verse from the Bible: Matthew 5: verses 27 through 30. As quoted by Jesus, you have heard that it was said do not commit adultery, but I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her heart—in—with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out or throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown tin [sic] to Hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away, it is better for you to lose one part of your body than for a—your whole body to go—in—to Hell.

I have... sinned... and I have made a terrible mistake. I cheated on my sweetheart, [[Ivy]]. [''Chris takes off glasses and sighs''] The other day when I was talking to—uh, when I was chatting onl—chatting on instant message with, uh, [[Vanessa Hudgens|Vanessa]], she tried—she, uh, play—she plays with me, but to give me a—[''mumbles''] tell be about how she was playing with herself and whatnot and trying to make me—trying to turn me on, but for a while I resisted by talking about Ivy and my promises to her... and I just didn't know how to react, so eventually I caved in, and even though I was typing in "Vanessa" I... was actually shouting "Ivy". But the point is, I... cheated on h—I cheated on Ivy, and... I am so... sorry about that. [''inhales'']

I w—I repent, I wish to repent my sins, in a—in front of, uh, everyone who is watching this and incl—and especially my sweetest Ivy. [''sighs''] I care about you, Ivy. I bein—[''stutters''] I am truly blessed to have you in my life. Ohh, I'd have to be an idiot to ever want to run—run away from you or lose you. Ivy, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. I repent. [''Chris smacks himself in the forehead with his fist'']

[''sighs''] Ivy, I devote my heart and my soul and my virginity, everything, all that... is only for you. Not for any other person. Especially my gal-pals, any one of them. Only for my sweetest Ivy. I promise with all my heart. I care about you so much, Ivy.

And a-also, wanna bring up another thing that comes to my mind, uh. You t—the [[trolls]] are calling me and telling me that Ivy is a troll. She is not. Because I have heard her voice. I've heard her voice for over a month, and she is true, in her voice and in her heart. I know so. As I have guide—as I was guide [sic] by, uh, [[God and Jesus]]. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, Godjesus were mad at me, so, even though she r—even though she requested the recent items of question, sex...—[''quietly''] sexual stuff: videos and pictures, I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them. So, I repent for... any sexual video I uploaded in the past, or any... image that may—that have been taken from me, or, uh... I upload myself. In the name of all that is holy and good, please. Leave us alone, you f—trolls. Leave us alone. [[Lies|I have so much to live for]]... and I'd be a fool to lose Ivy, to... give up Ivy. I would never give her up. I love her so much, hand on my Bible.

Peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy]]|nextlink=[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-17]]

A CWC Audition

2010-01-05T02:50:23Z

Joson: /* Video */

"'''A CWC Audition'''" is a video by [[Christian]], published by [[Clyde Cash]] on 16 [[April 2009]]. It shows [[Chris]] doing an audition in a film in which he believes he will be starring. This might be the first appearance of the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] on video.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = A CWC Audition
| image = {{#ev:youtube|ZdEBsGvG1Zk}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 16 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Comedy.png]] [[Random-access humor|Comedy]]
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Horizontal Red Shirt
| Other = [[Image:Leaked.png]] Leaked
| previous = [[Bunny Hop]]
| next = [[April 16 Fetish Vids]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[''Drops controller''] Oh yes, ok... to, eh, for Vanessa Hudgen's eyes only, this is an audition of, uh, some romance and anger, and a lil' bit of a sing along.

[''Starts singing'']

Ooooh it's a jolly holiday with [[Ivy]], Ivy makes your heart so light.

[''Reaches down to pick up a sheet of paper'']

When the sky's gray and ordinary, Ivy makes the sun shine.

[''Jumpcut'']

Ooooh happiness is squirrling all around her, a daffodil is smiling at the dawn.

When Ivy holds my hand, I feel so grand, my heart starts beating like a big brass band.

[''Grabs his shirt and starts pulling it back and forth to imitate a heartbeat, whilst making onomatopoeic heartbeat noises in unison'']

It's a jolly holiday with Ivy, the wonder that is Ivy that I love.

[''Finishes singing'']
[''Reaches down to grab another piece of paper with a drawing of Ivy on it'']

Mmmmh my sweetest Ivy, I like a ode to you from my heart.

"You are the sweetest Ivy, with you for you, covered the arboretum with such tender and such grace. You're surrounded by glorious fourly-clovered and shamrocks and strawberrys, and all sorts of vareity of delicious fruits amongst your vines. And yet the garden that you, that-that lies within the arboretum is majestic under the sunlight, but it's even more beautiful, is you, cause you are my sweetest Ivy. I love you. I love you Ivy. I'll never give you up because you mean so much to me. I love you Ivy."

[''Hugs and kisses an Ivy drawing while moaning'']

I say good morning to you every day, and I say good night to you every night, and I love talking to you about your day and mine. And about yourself and I tell you about myself so much, we can find in each other so well.

You mean so much to me Ivy, cause you have performed a mirac-you have performed a miracle that only my s-truliest [[sweetheart]] could ever perform. You've fixed my [[biological clock|biological clawck]].

[''High Pitched Baby Voice''] I bee sleepeee!, during the 9:00 hour, or 10:00... [''fake yawning''] mhhh, and I get up fresh as a daisy during the 6:30 am in the morning.

I love you Ivy, i'd fight for you, i'd fight for you if need be. [''Clenches fist and tone of voice changes''] Scoundrelous [[Clyde Cash]], you dare try to get in the mid of my path, of my path, in my internet life, even in my real life, you will NEVER steal Ivy away from me, cause not only will I protect her, but God n' Jesus will too.

[''Chris starts fighting against imaginary Clyde Cash'']

GET BEHIND ME, IVY! I'll protect you from that murderous scoundrel!

Clyde Cash...

[''Draws an imaginary sword from a sheathe, in a dramatic stylized manner, similiar to what you would see in an anime]'']

SHWOON!

Take this!

[''Swings imaginary sword while making silly onomatopeoic noises'']

Pfff! Pingg! Pishh!

[''Loses pretend sword and falls back to fists'']

Come on, you want some of this?! you want some of this, Clyde?!

[''Lands a devastating right hook on imaginary Clyde'']

Poomf!

[''Tired out by that last punch, Chris throws a slightly half-assed left hook, and then an even more half-assed uppercut'']

Poong! Poof!

Come on Clyde,

[''Performs a fatigued, poorly-balanced roundhouse kick, and nearly falls over before ungracefully spinning a full 360 degrees]

Kiah!

[''Whilst dizzily attempting to rebalance from the last kick, Chris cheap shots imaginary Clyde with another kick'']

Pwoon!

[''Pauses and lets his guard down to regain his balance. In a real fight, Chris would have had his ass kicked at this point'']

Come on, come on Clyde!

[''Mimes being punched in the face by Clyde. Recovers completely unfazed.'']

Pingg! Pishh! Oh, is that all you've got?! IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT?!'''

[''Chris throws several meek, fatigued punches, then suddenly regains enough energy to bend his back forward and perform a very retarded looking chain-punch attack, in which his fists seem to barely travel a few inches with each strike'']

HNGHNGHNGHNGHNG!!

[''Finishes off the chain-punch with an uppercut'']

BOOM!!

[''Imaginary victory for Chris'']

You murderous Clyde Cash, I swear I will protect Ivy with MY LIFE!, cause she means the world to me, and [[GodJesus|God n' Jesus]] knows it. No acting is required because, I mean this so much from my heart.

Fairest, Ivy, sweetest Ivy, stay by my side. I will love you and you will ALWAYS love me, for we have declared our love for each other so, much, so often, and I'll make sure to tell you I love you every day, and I will kiss you passionately, kiss you from, I'll kiss you from my heart. Every time my kisses come t-go to you, they'll be from my heart.

I love you Ivy, I always will.

[''Imaginary make-out, interrupted by imaginary Clyde Cash'']

Clyde... leave us alone... LEAVE US ALONE YOU MURDEROUS FIEND!

[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|'''SHIN-YE-HAME-HAAA!!!!!''']]

Stay down... stay down, and rot for the rest of your life. For you are destined for an underworld-for an underworld fate, for you have tortured not only my soul, but so many other souls, which upon, they're also known as the internet bullies and [[trolls]]. Begone, fiend!

Are you OK, Ivy? Good... Let's us depart to go home, where we'll make sweet passionate love, because we sure love each other, and our love is based so much on that, based so much on that. I love you Ivy, let's go.

Didn't have to remember this from my head? I came, made up as I went.

There you go that's my- that's basically good enough audition I hope, soo... thank you, I'll see you soon Vanessa.

Peace and love.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Bunny Hop]]|nextlink=[[April 16 Fetish Vids]]|}}
{{LeakedVideos}}

{{Clyde Saga}}
[[category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

CWC Update 12 April 2009

2010-01-05T02:32:05Z

Joson: /* Video */

"'''CWC Update 12 April 2009'''" (officially "'''CWC Update Easter 2009'''") is the video in which [[CWC]] announces the recent changes to [[cwcville]].com, and lets his [[sweetheart]] [[Ivy]] know that he loves her.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 12 April 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|Aez7dvMydHU}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 12 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Website.png]] [[CWCipedia]]
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Redstripeshirt.png]] Red Stripe Shirt
| previous = [[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]
| next = [[More for the crabs]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: Easter Sunday [[2009]].

[''inhales''] Just a short update.

The, uh, dating epi—the [[dating education]] episode for the [[Sonichu 9|#9 book]] is up on the s—[[cwcville]].com, and, uh, I heart—my heartfully dedicated, to my [[sweetheart]], [[Ivy]]. [''removes [[glasses]] for dramatic effect and makes creepy eyes'']

I love ya, Ivy. Hmm. [''chuckles''] Also, she wanted me to dedicate it to her pet [[Crass and Champ|hermit crab]].

Mmm. Have fun, she's got hermit crab, mm, so cute, hah, okay. [''sharp inhale'']

And also, I, uh, just, uh, also, and also dedica—it's als—nyeh—eh, in addition to it being dedicated to Ivy. [''exhales audibly'']

Also, wanted to, uh, take a moment to reflect the memory of a past, uh, p—gal pal, or troll, still rumors are flying about.... But anyway, the one who passed away, [[Sarah Jackson]].

And also, with due respect to her, uh, sister Rita. Moment of silence for Sarah J...

[''observes a 7-second moment of silence'']

Oh, cool. Mmm. Peace.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]|nextlink=[[More for the crabs]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}
[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-12]]

CWC Update 9 April 2009

2010-01-05T02:21:14Z

Joson: /* Video */

"'''CWC Update 9 April 2009'''" (officially "'''CWC Update 04092009'''").

[[Chris]] posted this video on his new [[YouTube]] account just a week after saying he was leaving YouTube forever.

In it, he announces his new website (http://www.cwcville.com, which is actually a good name). Now if he only renamed his comic that, redrew his characters to not match copyrighted ones, and renamed them, then he might have a work that doesn't violate copyright. But, then again, Chris does things for lulz/tard-rage.

Chris puts on a smug, grinning attitude throughout this video, saying his website is back up (<s>it'll probably get hacked soon</s> it was hacked soon after). He thanks [[God/Jesus]] and [[Ivy]] for their support, and ends it by saying, "I can feel the cosmos."

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 9 April 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|rhY2uVRkiT0}}</center>
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 9 April 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Website.png]] [[CWCipedia]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Horizontalredshirt.png]] Horizontal Red Shirt
| previous = [[YouTube Finale]]
| next = [[CWC Update 12 April 2009]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: April 9th, [[2009]].

Well, the [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] site is back up again. The address is cwcville.com. And I'd like to thank my sweetheart [[Ivy]], for her most heartfelt emotional support, and for fixing by [[biological clock]]. Truly the one miracle I need in my sweetheart, that I need my sweetheart for.

And also, who I'd like to thank, [[God/Jesus]], our God and our Lord and savior, for their support—for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow—I am guided by Jesus.

And with—uh, with the inspiration that I feel, I will continue the comic, at least about three pages a day, unless, uh, you know, something comes up... but I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better.

I can ''feeeel'' the cosmos!

Peace.

[[Image:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|center]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[YouTube Finale]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 12 April 2009]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries|2009-04-09]]

File:Sonichu Comic Issue 1.jpg

2010-01-04T21:05:36Z

Joson: uploaded "File:Sonichu Comic Issue 1.jpg"

[[Category:Sonichu (fanart)]]
[[Category:Mary Lee Walsh]]
[[Category:Jimmy Hill]]
[[Category:Sonichu 0 Cover Parodies]]

User:Joson

2010-01-04T16:36:39Z

Joson:

Ultra-newfag to CWCki and wiki.

If I fuck up something, let me know.

File:Panorama.jpg

2010-01-04T16:27:58Z

Joson: uploaded "File:Panorama.jpg"

A panoramic view of Chris' room.

File:Blanca15-001.jpg

2010-01-04T16:27:05Z

Joson: uploaded "File:Blanca15-001.jpg"

[[Category: E-mails]]

File:SchuComic9Page32-E.jpg

2010-01-04T16:26:48Z

Joson: uploaded "File:SchuComic9Page32-E.jpg"

File:SchuComic1.jpg

2010-01-04T16:26:40Z

Joson: uploaded "File:SchuComic1.jpg"

Sonichu Newsdash #4 short.