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OmegaCon

2015-09-04T00:31:16Z

King Starscream: /* Sightings */

'''OmegaCon''' is a gaming and anime convention held annually in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]]. Chris attended on Saturday, 29 August 2015. By all accounts, it was his first appearance at a convention since [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] in 2005.

__TOC__

==Overview==
On 29 August Chris announced on [[Facebook]]:

{{quotebox|At ‪#‎OmegaCon2015‬; totes ‪#‎BassCannon‬ the audience at ‪#‎Cosplay‬ Contest!}}

This was accompanied with a couple of photographs. It is not known who took these photos, but apparently Chris went alone.

[[File:OmegaconA.jpg|thumb|200px|left]]
[[File:OmegaconB.jpg|thumb|200px|left]]
{{clear}}

Someone on Twitter provided another pose:

[[File:OmegaconD.jpg|thumb|200px|left]]
{{clear}}

Somehow Chris had managed to escape his domestic responsibilities to his [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] and his [[Clover and Snoopy|dogs]] to spend the day having fun.

When [[William Elliott Waterman]] mistook his costume as a "vocaloid," Chris clarified:
[[File:OmegaconC.jpg|right|thumb|125px|Vinyl Scratch, AKA DJ Pon3.]]
{{quotebox|Vocaloid?! I am Not a Computer! I'm Vinyl Scratch, A.K.A. DJ Pon3! A Musical Soul with a deep sense into that bass. A slave to the beat and rhythm. You do not program me, because I'm already programmed in my biological CPU!}}

Vinyl Scratch is a minor character in ''[[My Little Pony|My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic]]'' who also shows up in human form in the ''Equestria Girls'' film series, which Chris adores. She cohabits with another musically inclined pony named Octavia. Chris had been a fan of this character for some time. He had added 28 videos to a playlist called "Vinyl Scratch and Octavia" on his [[YouTube]] account, and had made a number of positive statements on Facebook. Vinyl Scratch brings together Chris's interests in [[music]], [[Impulse Gay Social Club|dancing]], and--while the children's cartoon doesn't go there--[[Homos#Chris the lesbian|lesbianism]].

Chris's [[Chris and cosplaying|costume]] appears to be largely homemade. He is wearing the same purple My Little Pony goggles as when he attended his first [[Cville Pride|pride festival]] in August 2014, and when he [[26 December 2014|maced a GameStop manajerk]]. Vinyl Scratch's purple tights are conveniently suited to Chris's tucking methods. He had first given himself the terrible blue [[hair]] dye job in July. He is also, rather surprisingly, wearing his famous [[medallion]] in public, possibly for the first time since [[2010]]. This is similar to how he cosplayed "as himself" at Anime Mid-Atlantic for the sake of self-promotion. This time around, however, he's also promoting the medallions themselves, as they are his hottest [[eBay]] item.

Chris entered the cosplay [[contest]] and put on some sort of performance, presumably not unlike what the crowds at [[Impulse Gay Social Club]] have to put up with every weekend. A few days later Chris would reveal that he had just finished a seven-week belly dancing course, which undoubtedly influenced his moves.

<center><gallery>
File:OmegaCon2015.jpg
File:OmegaconF.jpg
File:OmegaconG.jpg
</gallery></center>

He didn't win. This doesn't seem to have dampened his spirits, though--he gave the event a five-star review on Facebook.

==Sightings==
Someone on YouTube posted seven seconds of surreptitious footage:

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chandler.mp4
| video = {{#ev:youtube|fGnDrQeZVWY}}
| stardate = 29 [[August 2015]]
| subject = OmegaCon}}

Chris can be seen very briefly in this walkthrough at 3:46 with a small group:
[[File:OmegaconI.png|thumb|right|200px|Still from video.]]
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = OmegaCon Walkthrough
| video = {{#ev:youtube|-wCtvVv1QoE}}
| stardate = 29 [[August 2015]]
| subject = OmegaCon}}

Another image of Chris on stage shows up at 7:21 of this slideshow:

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Omegacon 2015 Musical Slideshow
| video = {{#ev:youtube|rB8GWRyzMjQ}}
| stardate = 31 [[August 2015]]
| subject = OmegaCon}}

He attended several panels focused around storytelling, world building, and publishing. He took every chance he could to shill his comic to the presenters and acted indignant when they said they had never heard of it. Despite this, he had homemade business cards for the event that he ran into someone who hadn't. He left the world building panel early after sitting through several over attendees discussing their own projects, apparently because they didn't get to him fast enough.

He carried several of his usual affects, including a Sonichu amiibo, is a bag bearing the marriage equality logo with the message "TOTES GAY" written in large letters.

==External Links==
* [http://www.omegaconvention.com/ Official Website]

{{Places}}

[[Category:Places]]

Homos

2015-09-04T00:31:04Z

King Starscream: /* Evidence against Chris's heterosexuality */

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|Fun fact: [[Rainbow]] colors are the internationally recognized colors for the gay pride movement.]]
{{Quote|I Am Straight; [[China|Vaginas]] and [[Plush breasts|Boobies]] Give Me MY ERECTIONS; You Damn Homos have NO CHANCE with me EVER.|[[Chris]].<ref>[[Mailbag 31]]</ref>}}
{{Quote|I put a condom on the dildo and actually did put it up my, uh, A-hole. Uh...and uh, in my humble opinion, it just did not feel right to me. And uh, the anal beads, I just put 'em in there and they were, it's like... in. Not so stiff. So it was just that one time, then they got covered in poo, and I just, I put them in the trash can.|Chris.<ref>[[BlueSpike_PSN_Chat_3]]</ref>}}

'''Homos''' is the pejorative term by which Chris referred to gay people--almost invariably gay males--nigh exclusively at the time of his discovery. He has also occasionally used phrases such as "those of the wrong orientation", because even saying the word "homo" or "gay" makes him uncomfortable.

From the very beginning of his [[internet]] fame in [[2007]], his extreme opposition to homosexuality and his neurotic, obsessive demand that everyone "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|STAY STRAIGHT]]" have been one of his most noted and exploited aspects. Chris's ire for male homosexuals is confusing, since they, of all people, pose the least threat to his [[Love Quest]], and seems to be motivated entirely by his own sexual insecurities.

At various times, most recently following his coming out as a "[[Tomgirl|transgender]] [[Gaybian|lesbian]]" in [[2014]], Chris has seemingly recanted previous homophobic statements, claiming to have become fully supportive of equality and human rights. In nearly every case, this has been at the request of a gal-pal or sweetheart, and like most of his [[Chris and remorse|apologies]] has been insincere. He apparently remains repulsed and unnerved by homosexual men on a personal level.

==Fear of being a homo==
[[Image:0067-Christian&Barbie.jpg|thumb|left|Chris tried to stay straight from an early age, by posing with Barbie.]]
[[Image:CWC new novel.png|thumb|A glimpse into the future?]]

{{quote|"Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."|Chris. <ref>E-mail to Megan, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*:; Date: Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm</ref>}}

Chris's homophobia is just that: he is literally afraid of homosexuality and of anything that could conceivably cause him to be "leered off the straight path." His terror has been such that he was barely able to bring himself to even utter the word "gay" or any other term concerning gay people, except of course for "homo." He seems to struggle with intrusive homosexual thoughts; he has said that he cannot even look at a picture of a [[pickle]] without being "freaked out."<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref> In [[Kill De Jack]], Chris revealed that he had to cover a section of his computer screen with a piece of paper so that he could browse the [[CWCipedia]] without looking at [[Jack Thaddeus]]'s pro-gay advertisements. Nothing will get Chris angrier than being "mislabeled" as a homo.

Chris's homophobia seems to have emerged sometime in 2006, as his very earliest expression of anxiety is his classic "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|Future Message]]," released in February 2007. At no time before this, either in his comics or his [[diary]] or his private correspondence, does he make any reference to homosexuality. It apparently grew out of the complex stew of his [[noviophobia]], his failure to achieve his Love Quest, his admiration for [[My Little Pony|girly toys]], his own [[Chris and gender|gender confusion]], his loathing of [[muscle bra|male bodies]], and [[autism]].
[[File:Taking it in the briefs.JPG|thumb|right|You're making this painfully obvious, Chris.]]

==Defenses against becoming a homo==
[[Image:CWCIsSTRAIGHT.jpg|thumb|According to Chris, heterosexuals defend their sexuality by stomping on [[vibrator]]s and showcasing index cards indicating their straightness on their shoes.]]
It's hard work for a warrior of true love and honesty to stay straight. Chris uses many strange and totemic objects, from a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|poster of Sailor Moon]] to his [[Optimus Prime]] toy, to aggressively assert his straightness. Chris has said that he stared at his Sailor Moon poster every day to stave off temptations of homosexuality. The centerfold poster of [[The Simpsons#Marge poster|Marge Simpson's ''Playboy'' edition]] was another of Chris's many defenses against becoming a homo. The fact that she is a married cartoon character does not seem to have dissuaded him. Chris also subscribes to ''Playboy'' to help keep himself straight. You can tell he's straight because when he's explaining what he finds attractive in women it only takes five seconds for him to get around to breasts and china.

When homosexual (or potentially homosexual) fans sent Chris questions on the CWCipedia asking for tips to STAY STRAIGHT, Chris tended to suggest what essentially amounts to self-brainwashing. Some of his ideas included thinking of naked women and how awesome they are, and imagining being struck by painful lightning whenever a homosexual thought occurs.<ref name="ReferenceA"/> He also clarified that one needs not buy a Sailor Moon poster in particular; any poster featuring attractive women (preferably in bikinis and looking sexy) will do the trick. He believes these rituals are necessary to "maintain" sexual attraction to women.<ref name="ReferenceA">[[Mailbag 3#Hypnotize away the gay|Mailbag #3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 3#Sexy posters|Mailbag #3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 4#Dissolving homoerotic thoughts in stomach acid|Mailbag #4]]</ref>

Chris has also encouraged women to not [[Alcohol|drink]], [[Tobacky|smoke]], or be physically abused while pregnant, as this could cause the baby to be born homosexual.<ref>[[Mailbag 5#Daniel Tammet/Punching your baby will make it gay|Mailbag #5]]</ref> Chris is also convinced that his chances of becoming homosexual have been raised because he did not engage in heterosexual intercourse before maturation,<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Dating_Education</ref> hence his oft-stated regret that he did not get [[dating education]] classes in high school, and his recommendation that they be made available for the youth of today.

Considering the myriad of habits Chris has cultivated which are highly atypical for a straight male, it seems certain that he has been at the very least sexually confused. He is demonstrably very aggressive and insecure about it.

==Hatred of homos==
Chris is not simply afraid of becoming a homo himself--he hates all gay men. This animosity seems to result primarily from his fear of them (and all men) and their supposed ability or desire to make him gay. He has often characterized the [[trolls]] - all of them - as homos, which is either a basic ''ad hominem'' attack or a sincere belief that anyone who draws penises on [[Rosechu (character)|Rosechu]] must be gay. It also reveals a belief that all of his trolls are male, since Chris uses "homo" exclusively in reference to gay men. This notion is not only [[Vivian Gee|demonstrably false]], but in fact [[Chris and reality|completely delusional]], since many of Chris's greatest trolls have been women, and Chris knows it. This exercise in selective memory likely stems from Chris's loathing of male [[JERKS]] and inversely-proportional adoration of [[Gal-pals|women]].

Notably, in [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC chat]] from 2 [[January 2009]], Chris made this statement:

{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "[[Wikipedia:Deck the Halls|Deck the Halls]]"|Chris, 2 January 2009, 11:59.}}

[[Image:Bionic2.jpg|thumb|Chris projects his repressed homosexuality onto [[Bionic the Hedgehog|one of his own abominations]].]]

Chris further went on to propose a bizarre form of conversion therapy in which all gay men would be imprisoned and made to sleep with both female offenders and prostitutes, thereby "reprogramming" them. Interestingly, a certain [[wikipedia:Heinrich Himmler|Herr Himmler]] had a similar idea, suggesting that "pink triangle" concentration camp prisoners be forced to sleep with (female) camp prostitutes.

{{quote|[they would be] taken in and reprogrammed with multiple upon multiple pleasurable moments with female prison inmates and prosts.|Chris, 2 January 2009, 12:01.}}

On 30 [[January 2010]], Chris voiced his sagacious opinion about the ban on homosexuals serving openly in the American military. He advocated the lifting of the ban, but only so that "[[Mailbag 49#Chris loves his country|the homos can go die in explosions]]."

The universe of [[CWCville]] has also seen an anti-gay jihad. On 5 [[January 2010]], Chris stated that [[Magi-Chan]] keeps a constant psychic surveillance to ensure that there are no homos in CWCville. When evidence of homosexuality is found, the people involved are [[Chris and the Law|arrested and fined heavily]]. In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], Chris's comic self travels into the future, where scientists have successfully isolated the "homo gene" (An idea stolen from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "[[Wikipedia:Family Gay|Family Gay]]"). They have not, however, isolated the "straight gene", and are only able to when Chris donates his own blood (Chris has once remarked that [[Wikipedia:Sonderbehandlung|homosexuality could be cured by injecting blood from straight men into homosexuals]]). Chris then brought back to the present enough of the "cure" to turn every gay person on Earth straight. Ironically, a vaccination traditionally consists of introducing a small amount of the disease to a body to stimulate the immune system - so Chris unwittingly implied that his blood contains the dreaded homo virus.

A classic case of Chris's homophobia surfaced in the struggle over advertisements on his CWCipedia. Jack Thaddeus purchased ad space on the CWCipedia to put up 2 ads. One featured Peter Griffin of ''Family Guy'', pointing out that he and his creator, Seth MacFarlane, were supportive of gay rights; and the other promoted Mexican tourism with a cartoon [[pickle]]. Chris unsurprisingly went berserk, stating:

{{quote|I understand you getting paid to run ads in that box on the Cwcipedia. I feel okay with Vivian's [[Audiobooks]], BUT I feel OFFENDED with the Mexico Contest and Gay-Rights Ads. The Pickle on the Mexico ad reminds me of a terrible time in my past with Pickle-Suited TROLLS, and '''I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLES and FOR STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUALITY.'''|Chris.<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:WikiSysop#The_New_Ad-Links</ref>}}

In protest, Chris replaced Jack Thaddeus's gay-friendly ads with ads for [[wikipedia:Love In Action|Love In Action]] (an "ex-gay" ministry), ProtectMarriage.com (a site promoting [[wikipedia:California Proposition 8 (2008)|Proposition 8]]), and a site calling for a boycott of Pepsi due to their gay-friendliness. To sum it up, in one fell swoop, Chris managed to put in three big things that would ''not'' win him any gay friends whatsoever.

As with his fear of becoming a homo, the origins of Chris's deep homophobia are not clear. Certainly [[Bob]] had an influence, as the [[Matthew Noble call]] showed that he had the same kind of deranged hatred and prejudice as his son. On 7 January 2010, when answering the question of how he began hating the gay population, we got this interesting insight:

{{quote|I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, [[2003]] just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE!|[[Common Questions#Answered 07 January 2010|Chris, before finally stating (for the umpteenth time) that Sonichu is straight.]]}}

If this is true, Chris made no reference to it at the time, restricting his hatred solely to the heterosexual male [[JERKS]]. It is certainly ironic considering his more recent views on lesbianism. It also adds another interesting aspect to his hatred: Chris's frustration with homos is influenced by his being childish and whiny about not getting his way with ''one'' woman who turned him down. We wouldn't expect anything different from him.

Chris knows that his homophobia is unpopular with his fans, and he has often tried to persuade the public that he respects homosexuals for "who they are". However, he usually betrays his sincere intolerance of different lifestyles soon afterward - often within the same statement. On [[CWC Update 18 February 2009|18 February 2009]], for example, Chris issued one of his retractions of his previous homophobic remarks and declared that he respects "the gay people" just as he respects his gal pals and his [[List of Chris's sweethearts|sweethearts]]. However, this was done at the insistence of [[Julie]]; [[CWC with Bible - Leviticus|a mere month later]] Chris was [[Chris and religion|reciting verses from the Bible]] to once again preach against the vile homos.

On 14 [[June 2009]], Chris posted a "[[music]]" [[video]] called "[[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]", which, in his tradition of ruining everything you ever loved, is a homophobic version of [[Wikipedia:Uncle Ruckus|Uncle Ruckus]]'s satirical song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from ''[[Wikipedia:The Boondocks|The Boondocks]]''. Later on that same day, he published an [[I'm Sorry, Dude|apology]] for the video and insisted that he likes gays who "ac...accomplish other things, like [[Wikipedia:Stephen Fry|Stephen Fry]], who was a homosexual, but y'know he did a good job being a narrator on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''." Chris was of course unaware of the various other career accomplishments of Stephen Fry. It seems that this apology was only posted in the first place for the sake of his gal-pal [[Kim]]'s boyfriend, whose gay brother apparently lost both his arms in Iraq.

On 12 January 2010, Chris again appeared to soften his stance, saying that "I am decreeing that homosexuals will have equal relationship rights within CWCville." However, in the same breath Chris clarified, "gay marriage is still Illegal and Wrong. And [[Magi-Chan]] will stay out of those people's heads under my request."<ref>[[CWC Blog#12 January 2010]]</ref> The reason why gay marriage isn't an "equal relationship right" is not readily apparent.

More recently, not long after coming out as a "male lesbian," Chris felt deeply uncomfortable with being perceived as "gay" or "homo," and in Facebook statements attempted to exclude gay men from his crusade for gender equality. No doubt under the influence of his new sweetheart [[Catherine]] and other gal-pals, Chris retracted these clumsy statements, apologizing for the umpteenth time.

{{quote|I am accepting of the gays as people, just like most any individual person. Seriously, you all be proud of who you are. All I ask is not to find any reason to feel anger towards anyone of any orientation, race or whatever, based on their individual actions or offense as an individual person of self. Also, please disregard all of my past and Way past thoughts of turning gays straight; that was very wrong of me. I am very sorry about that, and continue to be true and proud of yourselves for who you are, as I am Very Proud of myself for being a Lesbian Transgender (a Female, Lesbian Soul trapped in a male body).|Chris<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts]]</ref>}}

He also announced his support for the Human Rights Campaign, going so far as to say that homophobics "are none other than the Cyber-Bullies and Internet Trolls who put hate on the innocent around the world; Young and Old. Some of which even put pressure on to force you into being something you know fully that you are Not!" Interestingly, his prior notion that all trolls are homosexuals had been completely reversed to the idea that they're all homo''phobes'', illustrating that Chris still believes that any detractor of his is part of an organized movement and [[Chris and his Ego|has personal flaws]].

However, if the past is any judge, the end of his relationship with Catherine has no doubt caused his homophobia to resurface. He confirmed in late 2014 that despite the fact that comic Chris shares his new gender identity, [[Reldnahc]], his opposite, is still an evil violent homo.<ref>Commissions</ref>

On 26 [[June 2015]], the Supreme Court upheld the constitutionality of gay marriage. Chris, shockingly enough, reacted very positively towards this:

{{Quotebox|Congratulations to us all for Nationwide Marriage Equality! If a holiday be made of June 26, 2015, how about ‪#‎PridependenceDay‬!

Now, I still require my Sweetheart to be my future wife. As a ‪#‎Lesbian‬ ‪#‎Transwoman‬, I do feel I am compatible with Any woman.

And No, I am not mistaken. I have been genuinely feeling and [[List of Chris's lies|identifying like a woman for about my whole lifetime]]. I never could appreciate the [[JERK|male's]] Neanderthal interests. And I felt more appreciative and comprehending of [[Women's Rights|fashions, makeup, shopping]], [[Chris and remorse|empathy]], identifying feelings and [[Death threats|looking to resolve problems]] [[Sub-episodes|reasonably]].

Plus, I have a great deal of [[Chris and Anger|self control]], and I can bring good and pleasant [[semen|tidings]] to an all woman party.

‪#‎LoveWins‬ ‪#‎OneFamily‬ ‪#‎LGBTQ‬ ‪#‎Pridependence‬ ‪#‎Pride‬}}

==Chris on his alleged homosexuality==
[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be [[Warning - Naughty Women ;)|having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]]]

* "I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT! I WILL NOT BE VEERED INTO ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!!!"<ref>[[Masturbating and squirtin']]</ref>
* "I'm STRAIGHT! I'm STRAIGHT! '''YOU'RE the homos!''' EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref>
* "I'm straight, don't doubt me!"<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref>
* "Listen, as hard as you fucking can, I CAME OUT OF MY AUTISTIC [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|CLOSET]] AS A STRAIGHT MAN, and NOTHING ELSE. SO YOU IMMATURE JERKS CAN JUST FUCK OFF."<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref>
* "Yep, you heard me. I am...a [[gaybian|gaaaaaaaaay...bian]]."<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the First Video]]</ref>
* "Anyway the, uh- anyway so, to get to the point...fine. I'm guhh. I'm gaaaay. I'm gaay. I said it...OK. Yep. So...did I really come out of the closet there? That just depends on y'all- how y'all understand it."<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the Second Video]]</ref>
* "And look at me. Do I look like- [*shakes head in disagreement*] '''No more of those stupid acquisition messages!''' Get it through your fucking, individual, damn, dirty SKULLS! '''I. Am. STRAIGHT!'''"<ref>''[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts]]''</ref>

===“Christopher” Christian “Ricardo” Weston Chandler’s Address to the Homosexuals===
On 6 August 2009, at a time when the trolls were getting the most mileage out of baiting Chris regarding his sexual orientation, Chris posted a wide-ranging screed on the [[CWCipedia]] which he hoped would clear up all misconceptions. His "Address to the Homosexuals," subtitled "I AM STRAIGHT!!! NOT HOMO; NOT BI; STRAIGHT!!! GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS!" is a classic statement on the issue. Unfortunately it had no noticeable effect on the trolling. The essay in full:

{{quotebox|
Good day, I write this essay with sound mind to address the major issues that has been bugging me constantly for the past few yeas, The Pressure and '''Stress''' FROM the Homosexual Population.

First off, as I have said OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND '''OVER Infinite Number Of Times''', ''I, “Christopher” Christian “Ricardo” Weston Chandler, AM STRAIGHT.'' '''No Question or Shadow of a Doubt, EVER.'''

I personally respect the individual people as fellow human beings, and I am cool with associating with them as acquaintances and friends, but Please Do Not Wave Around what you do behind closed doors around me; '''NOBODY CARES TO KNOW; I PERSONALLY DO NOT CARE TO KNOW.''' Even within my imagination, I Do Not Care to even have the pictures Randomly Pop up in my head. Every time of such pictures’ appearance, ''I feel Queasy and want to Throw Up.'' I humbly apologize for being offensive, but that is how I feel.

As a human being, I have no hard feelings conversing and associating with the homosexuals at any time. Individually, they each have a right to their own opinions, perceptions and peaceful lives. I fully understand and respect that.

''The only thing that really Grinds My Gears Harshly is being '''Wrongfully Labeled as a Homosexual when I am straight.'''''

I am aware of the way I stutter, space my words and all that from the way I talk, but I assure you, that I sometimes have trouble fully comprehending situations and status at first; it sometimes takes me a long while before I can fully comprehend and make an appropriate reaction. In another word, ''I am Sometimes Retarded.''

And the ONLY REASON I have not had sex yet in my lifetime WITH A WOMAN yet, is because '''the WHOLE TIME, I have been SHY'''; kept down with the ''Personal Fear of nearly EVERY Woman I see being Already Paired-Up with a Boyfriend''. I am not a man who likes confrontations with the guy who has spoken for the woman I’m eying over. And during my High School Years, '''I WAS NAÏVE on the subject of DATING''' (''Bring in Dating Education Classes, and Run them Alongside or Before Sexual Education, and make Dating Education Equally Mandatory)''. It had not dawned on me that I NEEDED TO BE DATING until AFTER I had turned Twenty-One-Years Old, during my Third Year attending Piedmont Virginia Community College.

And my '''Sonichu and Rosechu Comic Pages'''; again, I understand each individual person has their own perception of things, BUT Contrary to the individual perceptions among some people, '''The Comics, Drawings, and ALL Words ALL HAD NO MEANING OF ANYTHING Homosexual Whatsoever!''' I Personally in Real Life AND in the Comic Pages and all that '''PROMOTE BEING STRAIGHT''', No Question or Shadow of a Doubt.

All Those of You have Heavily Wrongfully Misunderstood Parts of All the Comic Pages and all that of such.

'''I, All my Sonichus, Rosechus, and citizens of Cwcville, Virginia, Do Not Appreciate At All Being Wrongfully Labled as homosexuals. IT REALLY INFURIATES ME, Sonichu, Rosechu and EVERYBODY ELSE.'''

I have also heard of My Sonichu being ''written in College Essays that promote homosexuality.'' And even worse, ''promoting him in the Gay Pride Parades.'' '''WRONG LABELS; STOP WRITING OR PROMOTING ME OR MY CHARACTERS AS SUCH!''' ''ALL Sonichus Are Straight! ALL Rosechus Are Straight! I Am Straight! My Comics are STRAIGHT COMICS.'' I, Sonichu and Rosechu, '''We Never Want to be part of ANY AND ALL Homosexual-Promoting Papers or Events, because with EVERY ITEM that is created from NOT OF MY OWN HANDS that EVEN Inklings such Wrongful Labelings upon, ME, Sonichu, Rosechu, and ALL MY STRAIGHT CHARACTERS, WE ARE ALL BEING DISREPECTED!'''

We will Never Take the Misunderstandings, Mislabelings And All The Like Sitting Down.

I, Personally, would RATHER have a PAINFUL Gender-Change Operation than EVER Turn Homosexual.

'''So, to reiterate, I, and 96 % of ALL CHARACTERS, are ALL STRAIGHT!''' ''NEVER EVER CALL me, my comics, or any of MY STRAIGHT Characters GAY!''

<nowiki>*</nowiki>sigh*

And to conclude, while I personally do not care about the homosexual lifestyle that swift, and I personally respect each individual homosexual person as individual human beings, '''The MAIN thing that really Infuriates Me is being called gay. DO NOT EVER Call Me Gay, or EVER Question My Sexual Orientation.
'''

''I, “Christopher” Christian “Ricardo” Weston Chandler, Am Straight. Period.
''

Thank you.}}

==Views on lesbianism==

Whereas Chris' discomfort with homosexual males has been fairly consistent, his views on lesbianism have wildly vacillated. In Chris's ''Carrie'' rip-off, "[[The High School Story]]", his Mary Sue character Terrah LeAnne Yowman is ridiculed and accused of being a lesbian by kids at her high school because she hangs around with male friends. As the work serves as a backstory to the villainous [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]], Terrah's bullying may have served as a fictional inverse parallel to the endless accusations of homosexuality lodged by Chris' detractors, illustrating Chris' worldview of implied homosexuality as an insult.

{{quote|She felt angry when she heard "Lesbian"; when called that, she would leave the bully an intimidating [[Creepy stare|glare]] with a purple glow from her green eyes. Then soon after, a Strong, Straight [[Christian Weston Chandler|Homophobe]] would attack that bully with [[Chris and religion|No Mercy]]; beat the crap out of that person.|"[[The High School Story]]"}}

On 25 July 2009, Chris produced a [[CWC "Boyfriend"|rambling and nonsensical video]] to the tune of Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend". In the middle of the video, Chris sings about the importance of "being straight" and intersperses a "STAY STRAIGHT" caption on a photo of a lesbian couple split in two.

{{quote|
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me!
Hey, you! Hey, you!
You need to be straight, girl!
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your boyfriend! }}

Later, Chris would gradually revise his former hard-line attitude against lesbians. In ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', Chris goes out of his way to state that the children of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] are watched over by [[Heather Iglesias]], whom he characterizes as "a pretty, trustworthy, good natured Spanish Lesbian."<ref name="Cwcipedia: Sonichu">[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu Cwcipedia: Sonichu]</ref> He further mentions that Heather keeps her sexuality a secret from the kids at the request of Sonichu himself.<ref name="Cwcipedia: Sonichu"/> Chris may have shoehorned a lesbian character into ''Sonichu'' to appear more tolerant, but his attempt comes off as half-hearted in light of his continual derision of gay men and insistence that Heather hide her sexuality.

In [[Mumble 1]], which took place on the last day of 2009, Chris declared his support for lesbians and reiterated his simultaneous hatred for gay men, stating that he hated [[JERKS]] in general, and how (typically) a porn DVD helped to soften his view on lesbians. In effect, Chris claimed that he supports lesbians because he believes women are beautiful, and hates gay men because men are icky.

{{quote|Uhh. Pretty much but it's like you know, between lesbians, it's like, hmm, partial [dis]courage. But then it's- but then again, but then between guys instead I would definitely 100% discourage. In my humble opinion...I've uh talked to others before with uh, [[PandaHalo|Sarah]], my uh s-s-Sarah, my girlfriend. I can not be willing to do a threesome with uh two women, but defina- but definitely never with two guys.|Chris, [[Mumble 1]]}}

{{quote|Yes, Yes they are- yes they're they're more beautf- they're more beautiful. They're like, they're really- they're truly like works of art in their own way- just like yeah you know, just like you know the statues that uh, were in past times.|Chris, [[Mumble 1]]}}

On 28 [[March 2013]], Chris posted a public [[Facebook#Gay Marriage |Facebook message]] whining about repeat media coverage of the Supreme Court's [[:wikipedia:Hollingsworth v. Perry|Proposition 8]] and [[:wikipedia:United States v. Windsor|DOMA]] deliberations. In it, he reiterated his support for lesbians and his disapproval of "the damn homosexual males".

===Chris the lesbian===
[[File:Chris at a gay bar.jpg|right|thumb|Chris's selfie from a gay bar restroom. Disturbing, but unsurprising.]]
On 14 [[August 2014]], Chris posted on his [[Facebook]] page that he himself was now officially a "lesbian-identified man".<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out...kinda]]</ref> He posted a picture of himself holding an LGBT flag. He stated that "I support the LBT fully; the G.[ay] M.[ale]s are fortunate to be on this boat." On 31 [[October 2014]], Chris spent that [[Halloween]] at a gay bar dressed as a "Groovy 70's Lesbian",<ref>[[October 2014 Facebook Posts]]</ref> further evidencing his apparent acceptance of homosexuality, in that visiting a gay bar was [[Chris and hypocrisy|THE thing Chris had specified on multiple occasions that he would never do in his life]].

However, as anyone who's even mildly aware of sexuality and gender will tell you, a lesbian male isn't actually a real thing. The idea of a "lesbian in man's body" is just something a guy might google after [[mass debating]], and Chris's citation of '''Yahoo! Answers''' to validate its existence is unpersuasive to say the least. Whether or not Chris has had a turn of heart, and realized the error of his ways when it comes to homosexuality, we'll just have to wait and see. Sexuality seems to be the most powerful governing force in Chris's self-definition, and as such it is perhaps unsurprising that it has changed so dramatically over time, given his utter failure to find his place in the world.

Chris's identification as a lesbian is closely tied to the next subject...

== Chris and transsexuality ==
{{quote|Tranny Pride, Worldwide!|Chris calling himself a derogatory term for transgenders, 14 August 2014<ref>[[Brassieres For Males#Chris comes out]]</ref>}}
[[Image:Die-cis-scum.jpg|thumb|right|Likelier than you think.]][[Image:Chris_15_Aug_2014_changed_profile_pic.jpg|thumb|right|Chris the "Male Lesbian Intersex Transgender."]]

Given that Chris lacks basic [[English]] skills, it shouldn’t be surprising that he has trouble navigating the linguistic minefield of ''transgender'', ''transsexual'', ''transvestite'', ''intersex'', ''bisexual'', ''hermaphrodite'', and his own ''tomgirl''. For someone who hates mislabelings, he sure is sloppy when it comes to these labels. On his [[OKCupid]] profile, when asked, "Would you date a transgender person," he replied, "Yes, as long as she was born female and was still female (or a tomboy)."<ref>[[List of OkCupid Answers]]</ref> He told [[Jackie]] that the fact that he loved wearing women’s clothing did not make him a “transvestite.”<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 24]]</ref> He told gal-pal [[Rebeckah Bentley E-mails|Rebeckah Bentley]] that the [[unclit]] made him “bisexual” when he meant intersex; he promptly flipped his shit when Rebeckah asked if he wanted to fuck dudes now.<ref>[[Rebeckah Bentley E-mails#Introducing the un-clit]]</ref> All of Chris’s claims about sexuality or gender identity need to be viewed through an autistic filter.

That said, Chris has spent many years struggling to articulate his position on transgender topics. In the early years of trolling, he confessed that he was uncomfortable with the idea of transgender people, and made it clear that he was not sexually attracted to them. “I have given thought about the transgenders and transvesites; I do not feel comfortable with them….[D]icks are dicks, and I do not care about them, except for my own,” he wrote in a [[January 2009]] chat.<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref> He later reiterated: “I Do Not Care Much for Transgender People or Hermaphrodites, but I do not discriminate them as individual people.”<ref>[[Mailbag 26#Reusing the same excuses for everything else!]]</ref>

{{quote|I would NEVER CARE to have sex with a Hermaphrodite.|Classic Chris, 15 January 2010<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Shemales and man-tits]]</ref>}}

Yet somehow, he could not let the issue rest...when [[Wikipedia:Bailey Jay|Bailey Jay]] introduced herself to Chris in a [[Mailbag]] letter, revealing some naughty selfies, Chris’s initial reaction was completely phobic at the sight of this "hermaphrodite." Later though, after Jay let Chris know that he had hurt her feelings, he reached into his shallow well of empathy. "I can relate to how you feel. Sometimes, I wonder what my life would be like if I was born female instead, because of some of my emotional, caring, self-conscious thoughts I had in my lifetime. Then I would later remember that God must have made me all straight male for good reasons."<ref>[[Mailbag 25#It's a trap!]] and [[Mailbag 27#Is Chris hitting on Bailey Jay?]]</ref> When Chris looked at this beautiful woman with a large pickle, he saw a distorted reflection of himself. He was not yet ready to abandon his “straight male” identity, though.

After becoming a [[tomgirl]] in 2011, even though he was still officially a "heterosexual" and "proud to be male," some of his words and actions betrayed a deeper gender confusion. He started using women’s restrooms. He told Jackie that he fantasized about "fit[ting] in at a lesbian bar," where he believed he would have no trouble seducing a lesbian and persuading her to bone "in lesbian's position (the scissor-thing) with my dick in her vag."<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 25]]</ref> In December 2013 he confessed to Rebeckah, "I wish I was born female, with the possibility of being a lesbian."<ref>[[Rebeckah Bentley E-mails#Dead end of a life]]</ref> He still seemed unsettled, especially since being a tomgirl wasn’t working to attract a Sweetheart/Soulmate.

On 14 [[August 2014]], he came out publicly, although as what exactly wasn’t certain, given his garbled and inconsistent vocabulary. The initial announcement was that he was "a Tomgirl, Intersex of Female Soul with Male Body, and a Tranny Cross-Dresser." Then he said he was a "Lesbian Identified Man and a Cross-Dressing Tranny." Two weeks later he was telling [[Catherine]] that he was a "Lesbian tomgirl transgender male" but also "[[Three-Quarter Woman|three-quarters woman]]." By September he seemed to have settled on "Lesbian Transgender (a Female, Lesbian Soul trapped in a male body)."<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out...kinda]], [[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Flirt the skirt!]], [[Catie Date Conversation Transcript#Understanding the whole tomgirl thing]], and [[September 2014 Facebook Posts#Alright, Alright, NOW It's OK to Be Gay]]</ref> In [[April 2015]], apparently no longer a "man," he changed his Facebook pronoun to "she" and his name to "Christine".<ref>[[April 2015 Facebook posts#A new pronoun]]</ref> This month also saw the beginning of a flurry of Facebook "likes" for all sorts of progressive transgender issues, such as restroom choice and gay marriage. Whatever he was, he was certainly proud of it, and wasted no time trying to persuade his new L(G)BT personal army to wage war against local manajerks.

===Does Chris Want the Operation?===
Almost immediately upon being discovered, Chris revealed that he had been giving a lot of thought to contingencies which might require him to lop off his [[duck]]. In 2007 he told [[Megan]], “if I ever stoop down to changing my path [i.e., becoming a homo], I might as well would get a gender change operation.”<ref>[[Megan emails, Aug-Dec 2007#Chris is angry about Megan kissing her friend, then pities himself]]</ref> He also made it clear to anyone who asked that he was literally nauseated by the sight of his own penis (and all other penises). It might seem self-evident, then, that Lesbian Transgender Chris would be eager to undergo sex reassignment surgery. However, in his intellectual discourses on transgender controversies, Chris has expressed some ambivalence. In a February 2009 chat, when asked if transwomen should "go under the knife," Chris replied:

{{quote|Um...[long pause] no. I- no no. And also I'll tell you- I'll tell you this- and if I ever have a trans-gender child with both sets of, uh, with both sets of uh, genitals, I would uh, raise that child to be a boy.|Chris, apropos of nothing<ref>[[Mumble 6#On The Transgender Community]]</ref>}}

He similarly told Bailey Jay (who also hadn’t asked) that "if I should ever have a hermaphrodite for a child, I would raise that child with the mentality of a boy/man."<ref>[[Mailbag 27#Is Chris hitting on Bailey Jay?]]</ref>

For a long time, these were puzzling statements, given his hatred for [[JERKS]] and all manner of pickled cucumbers. As his own gender identity mutated, however, Chris revealed his reasoning. In early 2014, on his OKCupid Q&A, he was faced with the question, "Imagine you have a newborn child whose sex cannot be determined. A risk-free surgery performed immediately could provide normal male or female sexual and reproductive function. Which would you choose?" Chris’s answer was, "Do not perform the surgery." He added,

{{quote|If a Hermaphrodite, I would raise it to be male regardless since it would not have any eggs anyway. Plus big bonus for (him) in sex with all women (lesbians included I would imagine).|Chris, exemplifying the wisdom of Solomon<ref>[[List of OkCupid Answers]]</ref>}}

In other words, there were two obstacles in the way of Chris losing his duck. First, a sex change operation wouldn’t provide him with reproductive organs. Since, as a woman, he would not be able to give the birth to [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]] personally (which is his true fantasy), he must first impregnate someone, as many times as necessary until the appearance of his God-promised daughter. He can’t adopt, because Crystal must come from "blood, tears, and semenal descent."<ref>[[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica#10 November]]</ref> He criticized fellow tranny [[Ahuviya]] (whom he incorrectly believed to be Jack Thaddeus) for trying to have the operation, claiming that he "would definitely not be considered any at all a woman--a woman whatsoever" because "he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive [sic] organs. I mean, I want to have children someday. Obviously, he don't."<ref>[[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]]</ref>

In late 2014, he could not persuade a sperm bank, lesbians on a message board, or his friend [[Open Relationship E-mails|Renee]] to serve as the vessel for Crystal.<ref>[[Semen#Donation]]</ref> So for now, its purpose unfulfilled, the Ugly Growth must remain.

The second reason he can’t get the surgery is that the duck is an [[Attraction Sign]]. As much as he loves to crow about being a "Lesbian," Chris wants to be "open to all women, Straight, Bi, and Lesbian." In a [[May 2015]] Facebook Q&A, regarding the operation, he was equivocal, and wrote, "I am exploring making the best of this body for Any Woman born with a vagina." If he wants to be everything for everybody, he will need to hold onto the duck.<ref>[[May 2015 Facebook posts#All This and Eye-Contact Too!]] and [[May 2015 Facebook posts#The Mailbag Returns]]</ref>

It should also be noted that Chris doesn’t have a fucking clue how sex reassignment works. In [[June 2015]] he posted an advertisement on Facebook: “I deserve to be a full woman with a full functioning vagina. A- blood type, if anyone wants to put up the money and trade.”<ref>[[June 2015 Facebook Posts#Let's Trade Genitalia]]</ref> As with most things he wants, Chris prefers to sit on his fat lesbian ass and wait for "a Magical Transformation of my body from Male to completely Female."<ref>[[Open Relationship E-mails#Depressed on Christmas]]</ref>

===In CWCville===
Before his slide into “femdom,” Chris used the intersex character [[Silvana]] to symbolize the evil trolls. The evil [[Count Graduon]] told her, “I am going to grant you with the power to transform like a Ditto. My price is that you will have to relinquish your ability to give birth, and you will be upgraded to have both parts. So with the biological upgrade complete, your years of training can begin.”<ref>[[Sonichu 8 Official Videobook#Episode 18]]</ref> She proceeded to seduce and horrify the tranquil community. After Chris modified his gender identity, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|Robee Sonichu]] also became a tomgirl, and later a full-fledged male lesbian. In May 2015 he confirmed that [[Comic Chris]] was a “Lesbian Transwoman,” and [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retconned]] [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] as a D-cup female with “a uterus and ovaries,” possibly to be renamed Chrissy-Chan Rosechu. Then, through the power of his imagination, Chris managed to ''impregnate himself'' with a turkey baster and give birth to twins.<ref>[[May 2015 Facebook posts#Meet Russel and Cynthia]]</ref> This scenario is probably as realistic as Chris ever getting a handle on his own gender.

==Evidence against Chris's heterosexuality==

[[Image:564Homos.jpg|thumb|left|At least Chris doesn't fail at cataloging pictures. [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality No, it's not a shoop].]]

[[Image:CWCMonica.jpg|thumb|[[Niggos|Oh lawd, is dat sum lipstick on Chris?]]]]

{{quote|First off, should such images [of men's asses] enter your mind at random, just stop yourself. I have had this problem too. I would take all such images when they enter my mind and just delete them; I imagine, in my mind, rolling them all into a ball, shrinking it down, and tossing them into a garbage can that links to my Stomach through a direct bodily vein. I imagine the feeling of it falling through the vein and making its splash landing into the stomach acid and dissolving; gone forever.|[[Mailbag 4|Mailbag #4]] - Chris admitting he's had homoerotic fantasies ([[Recycling|and eats imaginary man asses]]).}}

[[Image:Sonichuballs.jpg|thumb|For someone who claims to be straight, Chris sure does love talking about BALLS. Also, balls are touching.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|That's one [[pickle|phallic]] [[Lego]] tower you're building there, Chris.]]
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]
[[File:ChrisNewShoes.png|thumb|Totally not gay at all.]]
[[File:ChrisOneEyebrow.png|thumb|''One... eyebrow.'']]

Ironically, the [[Autistic dick|harder]] Chris [[I am STRAIGHT|tries to convince people]] he's straight, the less so he appears. He has absolutely no awareness that an uptight, milquetoast, colorfully-dressed, squeaky-voiced man saying "I am straight! I have a subscription to ''Playboy''!"<ref>[[CWC Update 18 January 2009]]</ref> every five minutes looks like he has something he's trying to hide. Furthermore, the more we learn about Chris, the more gay he really appears to be.

* Chris has stated that if he were unable to stay straight he would undergo sex reassignment surgery; he would rather be female]] than gay. It should be noted that straight men never, ever, put this much thought into this hypothetical dilemma.<ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref>
* He collects [[My Little Pony]] figures well into adulthood, and began this collecting way before ''Friendship is Magic'' premiered.
* For a straight man, he sure does [[Semen#Transcript|consume a lot of semen]]. Likewise, the idea of [[Kacey Call 1|licking his own ejaculate]] off one of his gal-pals sexually arouses him.
* Like many gay men, most of his "friends" were female and he never slept with any of them (despite his best efforts to do so).
* In a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN chat with Julie]], Chris revealed that he randomly has images of penises (his own and others he's seen in porn) pop into his head. He also claims to hear voices in his head that say "Christian is gay." Unless Chris is having ''very specific'' auditory hallucinations, it's likely he has homoerotic daydreams and freaks out about it. In the same chat he sounded ''delighted'' describing the first time he saw semen in a porno movie as a teenager.
* In the chat where [[Julie Reveals Herself]], when [[Max]] told Chris to suck his duck, Chris asked, "How can I do yours if I'm all the way over here?" instead of simply saying "no", although this could simply be his autistic mind trying to cope with hyperbole. Also, later on in the same chat, Chris attempted to show Max his duck when the latter began to taunt him with claims that he had a pussy. While you might be thinking that it's a typical knee-jerk reaction from Chris, an [[Julie_Reveals_Herself:_The_Prequel|earlier chat]] reveals a part where Chris ''offers'' to show Max his dick.
* He owns, or at least has owned, anal beads and a vibrator, and he is on record as having experimented with putting both toys in his anus. In a chat during the [[Vanessa Saga]] on 16 [[April 2009]], he claimed that he no longer shoved things up his ass, except for "a narrow jet of water from my adjustable shower-head on a hose."<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 3|Vanessa IRC Chat III]]</ref> Although it is quite possible to stick things up your butt and still be straight, people who are terrified of being turned gay generally do not do this.
* Chris said that he would put a large dildo up his ass for [[Ivy]] "in a heartbeat," and would let her fuck him with a strap-on.<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 7|Vanessa IRC Chat VII]]</ref>
* Chris said that he might let a gay guy fuck him if Ivy wanted that.<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 9|Vanessa IRC Chat IX]]</ref>
* Chris once drew [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a male character, on his duck.
* During their correspondence, [[Jackie]] told Chris she was curious about anal sex.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 5]]</ref> Instead of taking it to mean she wished to be penetrated from behind (as most men would have understood it), Chris thought she wanted to use a strap-on/anal bead on him and said he would comply. In her next email, Jackie clarified her intentions but said she was open to the prospect of being the penetrative partner,<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref> leading a jubilant Chris to discuss his past anal experiences in detail.
* According to [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|receipts]] uncovered by trolls, Chris specifically asked for anal beads as a gift with an order of pornography. Chris, however, lied, claiming that the anal beads as well as a vibrator were sent to him as a gift with an order of straight pornography; he did not ask for them or pay for them. Chris kept said vibrator around for months.
* In the [[Chris Sex Logs|sex logs]], Chris shows off a dildo to [[PandaHalo]]. He immediately suggests the phallic sex toy is something that [[Sex_Logs#This_is_my_dildo|goes up your butt]], and then immediately denies it's been up his butt. He also says having a dildo in your butt "will feel good."
* On [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|5 February 2009]], Chris posted two videos stating that he was coming out of the closet as a [[gaybian]]. He later issued a retraction, which was far less persuasive.
* When negotiating for the safe return of his PSN account from [[BlueSpike#Max|Max]], Chris was given the choice of burning his [[medallion]] or shoving it up his ass. Chris immediately chose to shove it up his ass.
* When Julie finally revealed herself as a [[pedofork|13 year old boy]], Chris's immediate response was "I did not know you were a 13 year old!" making it sound like he's shocked by the age but not the least bit concerned about the fact that he's a boy.
* Chris thought a straight woman would be turned on by a [[nudes|close-up picture of his anus]], not that anybody of any orientation would find it erotic.
* He wears a pink [[Belt Buckle of Fail|belt buckle]].
* He owns a set of [[Anime Wings]], which are essentially hair clips, which are essentially women's fashion accessories.
* His best man at [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|his wedding]] is [[Sarah Hammer]] in drag.
* He sang "I Love the Nightlife" on his [[Chris's Big Night Out|visit to a local bar/restaurant]], which is popular at gay clubs and drag revues.
* [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|''Christian and the Hedgehog Boys'']] features two covers of the [[Wikipedia:Backstreet Boys|Backstreet Boys]], one of a [[Britney Spears]] song, and one of a [[Wikipedia:Ricky Martin|Ricky Martin]] song. This music was popular among thirteen-year-old girls when it was new and is popular among the gay community today.
* Chris wears a [[bra]]. In fairness, he uses it to [[Fridays After Five|try to attract women]].
* He [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|implores men to wear bras]] because looking at shirtless men makes Chris uncomfortable,<ref>[[Mailbag 55#On brassieres|Mailbag 55]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 55#Draconian_fun.21|Mailbag #55]]</ref> possibly arousing latent homosexual urges.
* When you look up "Homosexuality" at the CWCipedia, you ''literally'' see his own portrait (as shown on the screencap at the top of this section).
* In the [[PS3 History Level]] video, he showed that he actually owns a copy of the ''[[Wikipedia:Sex and the City (film)|Sex and the City]]'' movie when he showcased his then-current collection of [[PS3]] games and movies.
* In his response to a letter in [[Mailbag 4]] about "impure" homoerotic thoughts, Chris confesses that he "[has] had this problem too," and has to resort to deleting them through a curious process that involves dropping the thoughts into his stomach acid, lest the gay gene take its toll.
* Chris reacts to [[Alec Benson Leary]]'s ''[[Asperchu]]'' comics by giving all the characters a [[Wikipedia:Queer Eye|free makeover]].
* In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], Chris donates some of his "straight blood" to doctors in the future so that they could make a vaccine against homosexuality. Vaccines are made from the virus, implying that Chris is "infected" with homosexuality if his blood could be used to make a vaccine.
* One of Chris's ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' vehicles is called "A Man's Toy", which is a light blue carriage with [[rainbow]] lollipop wheels and a message that says "Tea parties are good and nice" on the rear end of the carriage.<ref>http://community.modnation.com/en-us/players/Sonichu/creations/1296110</ref>
* In the guise of his trollsona [[JenkinsJinkies]], Chris used [[Trollin Train]] to go into far more detail than was necessary about a supposed homosexual encounter, describing various acts with a relish out of place for someone who claims to be disgusted by the mere thought of a duck.
* In the above same Trollin Train post, he mentioned achieving comeuppance before vomiting, indicating he had an erection, and thus was sexually aroused from being sodomized by a man.
* He made a drawing of [[Punchy Sonichu|Punchy]] [[:File:Punchylaylalove.jpg|wearing panties and a bra]].
* He also made a [[:File:SchuSoneeRosey.jpg|drawing]] of a [[Sonee & Rosey|Sonee and a Rosee]] in which the hairless spot on the Rosee's abdomen looks suspiciously like an erect penis.
* The [[Scrapbook of Fail]] contains a [[:File:115-CWCEmbarassed.jpg|self portrait of Chris]] as the ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'' character [http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Dark_Magician_Girl Dark Magician Girl].
* He voluntarily dressed up as a woman, went out in public and used [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Girly Things Tee Hee|the woman's washroom]]. While not all cross-dressers are homosexuals and vice-versa, men who are afraid of being seen as a homosexual generally do not take a disturbing amount of pride in cross-dressing in public. When Bob learned of Chris's antics, his immediate response was to call him a "fag".
* On 29 April 2012, Chris 'reveals' that the gay camp experience story he made up as [[JenkinsJinkies]] was a fake. Aside from the fact that [[Naive|absolutely nobody fell for this at all]], it does leave this question: Out of all of the stories that Chris could have made up under a fake identity, why did he go with one where he gets sodomized at [[Pedofork|seven]]?
* [[It's not that cold]] shows Chris infamously saying, "Would you fuck me, 789chan? I'd fuck me." Take note that Chris is dressed in a mini-skirt and hikes it up to reveal his grotesque man ass at the camera, indicating that he'd like to be taken from behind, all in an attempt to re-enact ''The Silence of the Lambs''.
* Whenever anyone calls Chris out on his [[Women's rights|objectification of women's bodies]], he is always quick to back-pedal and say he appreciates women more for their personalities, unaware that personalities are the key reason for relationships between gay men and their female friends.
* Chris created a modified version of the song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from ''The Boondocks'' called "Don't Trust Any Homos Over There". However, the character who sings the original song is Uncle Ruckus, a self-loathing black man. This makes Chris look like a self-loathing homosexual.
* The fact that he thinks that ''staring at a poster'' will keep himself straight implies he has homosexual thoughts and fantasies that he wants to keep in check. The irony of the fact that he thinks staring hard enough at a poster of Sailor Moon, a gay icon, will magically suppress these homoerotic urges is lost on him.
* After [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]] became Chris's equal and opposite as the result of the latter's brief immersion in the [[Dark Mirror Hole]], he turned openly gay. One would think that this logically means Chris is straight, except for the fact that it's made clear that the two differ only in their openness, not their homosexuality.
* Chris posted an absurd "riddle" on [[Facebook#The_Riddle|Facebook]] containing random pictures, containing Mark Cuban, lemon cake, Delaware Blue Hens and the Sphinx. It's worth noting that [http://i.imgur.com/oKAtnAo.jpg Mark Cuban] is gay, lemon cake is often dyed rainbow in [http://i.imgur.com/qy1U14g.jpggay pride festivals], Delaware is one of the only states to uphold [http://i.imgur.com/YVAnfl9.jpg gay marriage], hens often exhibit homosexuality, and there's a game called [http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=gay%20chicken Gay Chicken], and the sphinx is also a breed of cat. A breed of cat that's [http://i.imgur.com/uBwdEdz.jpg really gay].
* In 2012, Chris signed in the [[CWCki Forums]] as "paintingatree". The term "Painting The Tree" is [http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Painting%20the%20tree act slang for oral sex], which may refer to his duck.
* Chris posted a picture on [[Facebook#I_got_new_shoes|Facebook]] showing his new shoes. Note the gay pink laces and it looks like sneakers worn for women.
* Chris posted a pointless picture on [[Facebook#One Eyebrow|Facebook]], showing his eyebrow. Note that it's '''eyebrow''' and not '''eyebrows''', as [http://www.discodamaged.com/2010/12/lesbians-to-grown-on-eyebrow.html lesbians are proposing to grow one eyebrow on Decembrow].
* Chris pierced his right ear (twice), a common, albeit dated, code for homosexuality--"Left ear buccaneer, right ear queer."
* Chris wrote a [[February_2014_Facebook_Posts#Tabitha_St._Germaine|Facebook post]] comparing Tabitha St. Germain, the voice actress of Rarity from ''My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic'' (among many others), to gay icon Judy Garland.
* Attempting to prove that [[Christopher's name change|Christopher]] is a separate identity, Chris favorited and commented on a number of gay [[pedofork]] [[anime]]s on [[YouTube]].
* In his August 2014 Facebook posts, Chris identified himself as a 'tranny' and a 'Ho Mo' ''(for the ladies, [[Chris_and_English|according to him]])'', placed a marriage equality support symbol on his page's banner, and spoke about women being "supportive" of his choices. He's blissfully unaware ''(or outright doesn't care)'' that all of this makes him look like he's come out of the closet.
* He [[October_2014_Facebook_Posts#Chris_hits_up_a_gay_bar_.28seriously.29|went to a gay bar on Halloween 2014]].
* He is a member of the local [https://www.facebook.com/groups/eventsatimpuslegsc gay club] on facebook.
* He once glitterbombed Sega. Glitterbombing was started by the gay community as a way to protest opponents of gay marriage.
* His [[26 December 2014|can of mace]] is colored pink.
* He posted a story on [[Facebook]] about him as [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] having sex with [[Magi-chan]] and getting pregnant.
* The tote bag he used at [[OmegaCon]] had a marriage equality logo and the words "TOTES GAY" written in bold capitals on it.

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Homosexuality}}

* [[Chris and religion]]
* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
* [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
* [[Gay 4 Sonichu]]
* [[Gaybian]] (a "male lesbian", according to Chris)
* [[Heather Iglesias]]
* [[It's UGH!]]
* [[Magi-Chan]]
* [[Rainbow]]
* [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]]
* [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]]
* [[Tomgirl]]

==Sources==
<references/>

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Homos]]

My Little Pony

2013-08-14T21:24:23Z

King Starscream: /* Chris and ponies */

[[Image:Chris_Chan_Pony.png|thumb|Chris Chan: The original brony]]
[[File:Mane6 Chaotic Combo.png|thumb|200px|A quick comparison between the [[wikipedia:Mane 6|Mane 6]] and the [[Chaotic Combo]].]]
{{taxpayermoney}}
'''My Little Pony''' ([[Wikipedia:My Little Pony|MLP]]) is a line of [[toys]] and animated programs intended for girls aged 4-8. Chris picked up an interest in the franchise after being introduced to it by [[Megan]] in [[2007]], buying several of the toys as well as making custom-made My Little Pony dolls for his friends. He has since developed an interest in the ''[[wikipedia:My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic|My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic]]'' cartoon.

==Chris and ponies==
[[File:Poorcamo.jpg|thumb|left|One of Chris's ponies, as seen in his [[bedroom]].]]
The homemade ponies vary between being blatant ripoffs of [[anime]] characters, most notably the titular character from ''[[wikipedia:Naruto|Naruto]]'' and [[Wikipedia:Edward Elric|Edward Elric]] from ''[[Wikipedia:Fullmetal Alchemist|Fullmetal Alchemist]]'', and horrible [[Wikipedia:Mary Sue|Mary Sues]] such as [[Cherokee|Cheroki-Chan]], who is clearly based on the [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|comic-book version of Chris]], and Crystal, [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|whose origin is obvious]].

In his infamous [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|FUTURE MESSAGE]], Chris first made his love of My Little Pony known when he recommended to all his viewers that they buy MLP figures of their favorite color to stroke and rub against their cheek, claiming that it was "very therapeutic" and that one could talk to the ponies and pretend that they were girls they wanted to ask out, to help them build confidence. At the time, this was viewed as a very revealing aspect of Chris's life, earning him the mockery of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4chan]] yet again.

In [[CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated|Captain's Log, Stardate March 18th, 2009]], you can see his My Little Ponys hanging from his ceiling.

One of the latest known references to MLP made by Chris was on the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum, where Chris used a picture of Applejack from the more recent ''[[wikipedia:My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic|My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic]]'' animated series as his avatar, although his screen name was modeled after the name of another major character in the series- [[Rainbow|Rainbow]] [[Tomgirl|Dash]].

[[Image:ponyboy.jpg|thumb|Applejack as Chris's avatar on [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]].]]

A ''Friendship is Magic'' Rainbow Dash toy can be sighted in the background of "[[Correction_of_EX_relationship_status|Correction of EX relationship status]]" and a G3 My Little Pony sticker can be seen on Chris's [[3DS]] in the [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"|Wristwatch-SwissWatch]] video.

Chris also has a ''Friendship is Magic'' playlist on his [[YouTube]] account that includes all the episodes, confirming once and for all his love for a children's show.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL20EBD1B6E8BB9E6F Chris's ''My Little Pony - Friendship is Magic'' playlist on YouTube]</ref> Considering [[Ghostbusters|his]] [[Transformers|previous]] [[Pokémon|track]] [[The Adventures of the American Rabbit|record]], it's not exactly surprising. In the [[Facebook]] note he made on 31 [[March 2012]], he complains about "gum gabbing gossip columnists working for a corrupt editor", which is the plot for the episode [http://mlp.wikia.com/wiki/Ponyville_Confidential "Ponyville Confidential"] (which aired not too long before the note was made), the giveaway being that the ''nom de plume'' used in the episode was "Gabby Gums."

On 24 [[April 2012]], Chris wrote a note on his [[Facebook]], calling for the rescue of the ''MLP:FiM'' character "Derpy Hooves", a character who is characterized by her googly eyes and [[Slow-in-the-mind|slow method of thinking]]. However, Chris saw it as a vehicle to gain more pity towards him by sympathizing with a character that had a sort of disability.

On the 26 [[June 2012]], Chris whined about dark pony related media on his [[Facebook]] via [[Twitter]]. He mentioned watching an animated adaption of the infamous ''[http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/cupcakes-my-little-pony-fanfiction Cupcakes]'' fanfiction and the "SHED" instalment of the [http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/ponymov .MOV series]. He took particular offence at Rainbow Dash - a tomboyish character - being gorily killed, which is featured in both videos, and wondered if people did it because they hate Tomboys/Tomgirls.
He went on to rant about the [[Lie|"Dark Parodies" being the reason behind his writer's block]], before descending into a tirade of hatred against people in general. In a twist of irony, it was recently discovered that Chris has not one, <ref>[http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2FD70214E0CF6E92 Jappleack Playlist on Chris' YT account]</ref> but two <ref>[http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2f2iqihk1im2B1M7ZXJyoCd-gkDLXYCQ Jackie and Jerry playlist on Chris' YT account] </ref> playlists from HotdiggedyDemon ''(inclusive of said videos)'', [[Chris and hypocrisy|the creator of the "Dark Parodies" that he hated so much.]]

In 2013, Chris' actions would cause him to become a social pariah to the Brony community ''(as if he wasn't one already)'' by calling out voice actress [[Wikipedia:Tara Strong|Tara Strong]] on her "Twilightlicious" video, claiming that she was tainting the name of the characters she had voiced by apparently supporting trolling and bullying. Many trolls had responded that his actions were, to say the very least, ''ridiculous'', due to him [[Autism|misunderstanding the context of her video]] and expecting a well-known celebrity [[Chris and his Ego|to personally answer to him.]] This certainly would have ended in Chris not hearing squat from Tara, had a troll not decided to forward his rant to her Facebook account. This is what she had to say:

{{quotebox|"I don't think I've seen anyone put an ugly spin on something this outrageously [[Chris and his Ego|for their own attention]]. Anyone who follows me know that I'm on a huge anti-bullying platform, and even wrote and produced a song about it.

All my "twolling" as we on Twitter call it is completely adorable and makes people smile. Christian's article makes me angry & disappointed. Hope I never meet the guy."}}

Despite not meeting Chris before in her life, Tara immediately chastises Chris as someone who would pull this stunt for attention, and makes note of her work in anti-bullying campaigns ''(which is something Chris would obviously not put any effort into researching)''. Chris has yet to respond, but it's pretty obvious that he'll not only disregard what she said, but also accuse her of being a '''"DANG, DIRTY TROLL!"''' like he does with everyone who disapproves of his bullshit.

When the ''[[Wikipedia:My Little Pony: Equestria Girls|Equestria Girls]]'' trailer was released, Chris threw a ''fit'' on Facebook, citing that it would attract ''"[[pedofork|pedofile]] (sic) perverts"'' into the fanbase<ref>[[:File:Chris-Chan - FB - Equestria Girls.png]]</ref> ''([[Chris and hypocrisy|this coming from the guy who drew porn in Sonichu 8.]])'' Hilariously, he then goes on to say that the Friendship is Magic crew is "Out Of Their Minds", ''right'' after saying "With All Due Respect," ''(even going so far as to name-drop Lauren Faust, who had left the show for over a year.)'' He then comments on his own note, [[Chris and his Ego|loudly demanding IN ALL CAPS that somebody pull the plug on it.]] Hasbro has yet to (see:'''will never''') respond to Chris' suggestions.

He later "liked" the some videos related to the movie online and named it his #2 favorite movie.

==Cutie mark==

In the [[Forgot the Glitter|new videos]] released on [[February_2012|Feb 25th]], Chris was spotted showing off a drawing on his left thigh which he calls his "cutie mark". It is the combination of the male and female symbol, surprisingly ''not'' having anything to do with [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] for once. It does not seem to be a real tattoo, but instead is drawn on, most likely with his [[Chris and art|felt-tip pens]].

In the ''My Little Pony'' universe, a cutie mark is a symbol representing an individual pony's special talent and interest. Chris's special talent, it seems, is being a [[tomgirl]]. Considering [[Chris and art|most]] [[Chris and music|other]] [[Spanish|things]] [[Chris and writing|Chris]] [[Chris and cosplaying|has]] [[Sonichu (comic)|tried]] and almost always failed at, it's still not all that surprising.

==In the comics==
[[File:Ponywed.jpg|thumb|Show this to any father with a young daughter and he'd probably think she made it. Purposely bad.]]

Like any eight-year-old girl with the hopes of marrying a blue prince in a fairytale wedding with her BFF pony by her side, [[Wedding_Comic|''Sonichu'' Special #2]] reveals to its unfortunate readers that Chris might have harbored similar thoughts, as his ideal wedding also features a My Little Pony.

After having received a blessing from the best [wo]man [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]], the recently united Chris and [[Ivy]] leave the church where the wedding was held in a carriage pulled by what many trolls speculate to be a badly-drawn [[Wikipedia:List_of_My_Little_Pony characters#Rainbow_Dash|Rainbow Dash]], which is harnessed to the carriage with what appears to be the Boulder Badge from [[Pokémon]].
{{-}}
==Gallery==
<center>
{| class="wikitable collapsible" width="600"
! colspan="4"|The Gallery of My Little Pony Straightness
|-
!Chris' creation
!Original
![[Card games|TCG card]]
!Notes
|-
|[[File:03-CWC Cheroki-Chan1.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Cheroki-Chan
|[[File:Chero.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in Seaspray Pose
|[[File:01-Cheroki-Chan_Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]][[File:02-Cheroki-Chan Card2.jpg|120px|center|text-bottom]][[File:159-ChrokiChan.jpg|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|Chris's depiction of himself as a pony...or rather, a horse- [[Chris and his Ego|too awesome to be a common pony]]. Just as Chris, Cheroki-Chan has a few [[Autism|quirks]], likes to [[Chris and art|draw and color]], but above all, he is [[Rape|noble and honorable]]. Cheroki-Chan [[Dreams|"creams"]] of finding a [[sweetheart]] for himself, yet is having problems, mainly from being rejected once by that [[Chris and race|multi-green pony]], possibly [[Megan|camouflaged]].
|-
|[[File:07-CWC Camo-Flage.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Camo-Flage
|[[File:Camo.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in [[Wikipedia:List_of_My_Little_Pony_characters#Rainbow_Dash|Rainbow Dash]] pose
|[[File:06-Camo-Flage Card.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|Posible representation of [[Megan Schroeder]]. She [[Friend Zone|rejected]] Cheroki-Chan's advances, and she is Jonhlamence's little sister.<ref>[[:File:12-Johnlamence Card.jpg]]</ref>
|-
|[[File:49-CWC Mimmbo Bo Boruto.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Mimmbo Bo Boruto
|[[File:Mimmbo.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in [[Wikipedia:List_of_My_Little_Pony_characters#Rainbow_Dash|Rainbow Dash]] pose
|[[File:48-Mimmbo Bo Boruto Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|Custom pony based on and made for [[Daniel Mimms]]. ''[[Wikipedia:Naruto|Naruto]]'' is another inspiration.
|-
|[[File:46-CWC Squall Metal Alchamest.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] [[Wikipedia:Full Metal Alchemist|Squall Metal Alchamest]]
|[[File:Squall.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Pony in [[Wikipedia:List_of_My_Little_Pony_characters#Rainbow_Dash|Rainbow Dash]] pose
|[[File:45-Squall Metal Alchemest Card.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|An inter-dimensional pony with [[Barbara|motherly]] issues. Based on [[Wikipedia:Edward Elric|Edward Elric]] from ''[[Wikipedia:Fullmetal Alchemist|Fullmetal Alchemist]]'', though part of the name may come from [[Wikipedia:Squall Leonhart|Squall Leonhart]] of [[Wikipedia:Final Fantasy VIII|''Final Fantasy VIII'']].
|-
|[[File:10-CWC Crystal.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Crystal
|[[File:Crys.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony Cutie Keen Bean
|[[File:09-Crystal Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|Commemorative pony of [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]], Chris's future daughter.
|-
|[[File:13-CWC Johnlamence.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Jonhlamence's cyberwarrior
|[[File:Sala.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in Rarity Unicorn Pose
|[[File:12-Johnlamence Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|Camo-flage's older brother combined with the [[Pokémon]] [[Wikipedia:List of Pokémon (320–386)#Salamence|Salamence]].
|-
|[[File:18-CWC Ty Game2.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Ty Game
|[[File:ty_game.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Rainbow Swirl Pose
|[[File:16-Ty Game Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|[[Video games|Gamer]] Pony.
|-
|[[File:22-CWC Bee-Riana.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Bee Riana
|[[File:Bee reana (yellow with the antena.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Ponies Toola-Roola (left) and Meadowbrook (right)
|[[File:21-Bee-Riana Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|When he bought the two-Ponies-set, Chris took Toola-Roola's antennae and put them on Meadowbrook to create Bee-Riana. [[Chris and Sex|Toola-Roola hasn't been seen since]].
|-
|[[File:26-CWC Educait.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Educait
|[[File:Edu.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Sunny Daze Pose
|[[File:25-Educait Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|A nerdy Pony. It is of the [[Wallflower]] type.
|-
|[[File:30-CWC Honeysumerah.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Honeysumerah
|[[File:Honey.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Sweet Breeze Pose
|[[File:29-Honeysumerah Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|Based on a [[Britney Spears|shallow Pop Star]]. "Stickler for a tickler" comes from a throwaway ''[[Family Guy]]'' gag, from [[Wikipedia:When You Wish Upon a Weinstein|"When You Wish Upon a Weinstein"]].
|-
|[[File:33-CWC_Modest_Manna.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Modest Manna
|[[File:Modest.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Sweet Breeze Pose
|[[File:32-Modest Manna Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|[[Anna McLerran|Mormon]] pony.
|-
|[[File:36-CWC Linnhadey.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Linnhadey
|[[File:Lin.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in Beachberry Pose
|[[File:35-Linnhadey Card.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|'[[Autism|Unique]] and [[McDonalds|Lovin' it]]' Pony.
|-
|[[File:43-CWC Federico.JPG|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Federico
|[[File:Fede.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in Beachberry Pose
|[[File:42-Federico Card.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|[[Spanish]] Pony. He is annoying because "chicos are chicos."
|-
|[[File:39-CWC Buttonbeck.JPG|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] [[Nudes|Butt]]onbeck
|[[File:Bottom beck.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Diva Pose
|[[File:38-Buttonbeck Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|[[Rosechu|Generic soulless and flavorless]] Pony.
|}
</center>

==See also ==
*[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]
*[[List of toys]]
==References==
<references />
==External links==
*[[Wikipedia:My Little Pony|My Little Pony]] at [[Wikipedia]]
*<s> [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=F12XOB4B Chris's MLP collection photoset download] </s> - Dead link.
[[Category:Hobbies]]
[[Category:Toys]]

Blazebob Sonichu

2012-08-15T15:55:54Z

King Starscream:

[[Image:Blazebob.png|thumb|110px|Blazebob's first depiction by [[PandaHalo]].]]

'''Blazebob Sonichu''' is yet another unoriginal recolor who has even less personality than other [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichus]].

==Origins==
[[Image:BlazeBobHeadshot.jpg|right|thumb|110px|The fuck is up with his eyes?]]

Originally created by [[PandaHalo]] along with [[Chloe Rosechu]], Blazebob is proof that Chris is so unoriginal that he has resorted to recoloring his recolors. He provides the other half to Chloe, as no inhabitant of [[CWCville]] could possibly ever be single.

His name comes from [[Robert Simmons V]], a famed [[troll]] and former ally of Chris. According to PandaHalo, Robert had traveled all the way to Australia just to hang out with her, and she had become infatuated with him. The character was named in his honor, and was originally conceptualized as a transformation for Robert, just like [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] and [[Reldnahc Ha-Taque]].

Although his name is sometimes given as "BlazeBob", with a CamelCase "B", Chris spells it "Blazebob",<ref>[[Mailbag 34#Electric inequality Pokémon]]</ref> not that you'd be able to tell from the comics since all dialogue in [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] is written in ALL CAPS [[Comic Sans]].

==In the comics==
[[File:BlazeBobMourning.JPG|right|thumb|110px|Blazebob and Chloe, during their 15 whole seconds of mourning for the [[Chris and Death|death]] of PandaHalo]]

Since being introduced in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], his only action since being launched from a burning building has been to tell Chloe to "[[Ryan Cash|move on]]" after their trainer's death, before disappearing without a trace. He is the second Sonichu in the series to have fire powers, the first being [[Wes-Li Sonichu]] back in [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]], thus making him completely redundant.

In the [[CWCipedia]] article for [[Sonichu]], "Blazebob" is described as a potential evolution for an infant [[Sonee]] should it be exposed to a Fire Stone.

Curiously, [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] gives Chloe and Blazebob's ages as 17 and 18 respectively,<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_74</ref> which if we are to take Chris's [[retcons]] into account would make them the youngest two Sonichus and Rosechus alive, at least until [[Sandy]] evolved. Chris previously claimed that all of the grown up Sonichus in the comic were hatched from a batch of eggs created by the Chaotic [[Rainbow]] which sent the eggs back in time to February 2nd 1989, though they ended up in different locations.<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#Origins</ref> It has yet to be explained why these two Sonichus in particular are for some reason younger than all the others, but the only other possible explanation for where they come from has some unsavory implications, given that the only other [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] around at the time they were born were roughly four years old.<ref>[[Sonichu chronology]]</ref>

Due to Chris's poor art style, Blazebob looks nearly identical to [[Ultra Sonichu]].

== Sources ==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Robert Simmons V]]
*[[Chloe Rosechu]]
*[[PandaHalo]]
*[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]

{{Not Jerks}}
{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Sonichus]]

IRC (02 January 2009)

2012-08-15T15:55:31Z

King Starscream:

Another mix of fan questions and personal chatting from 2 January 2009.

This transcript begins with a sexy personal chat between [[Chris]] and [[PandaHalo]]. It's characteristic of their interactions around this time - Panda is obviously mocking Chris, while Chris is entirely oblivious. Later, Chris chats with his "fans," including [[Vivian Gee]], who asks many penetrating and revealing questions.

==Summary==
In his "private" conversation with Panda (it was still a regular, public IRC chat, except Chris was told the chat was being set to "private"), Chris is obviously doing his best to seem "gentlemanly" and restrained. He refuses to be lured into cyber sex by her remarks about topless photos, nude photos, photos of her playing with her "five-speed manual" dildo, or the prospect of an orgy with the [[Sonichu Girls]]. It's likely that at this point he was distracted by his new would-be sweetheart, [[Julie]].

Turning to a more serious subject, Panda mentions that her father is suffering from terminal cancer. Chris responds with his typical lack of empathy and seems to be fundamentally confused as to the meaning of the word "terminal," unless he believes that Panda's father might actually be saved by the power of prayer. When Panda has to reconnect to the chat, Chris, being paranoid, decides to test her by saying he's sorry her aunt has leukemia, obviously expecting her to calmly correct him by saying her ''father'' has ''melanoma'' and thus proving she's the real Panda. (Of course, Chris is unaware of a subtle concept called "not fucking around about deathly ill relatives".)

At one point Chris mentions a potential [[love quest]] accessory that he never seems to have put into practice: "a red name sticker with the word 'Single' on it."

After slipping out of his "private" chat with Panda, Chris begins answering several questions from [[BlueSpike]] and Vivian covering a wide range of topics.

Asked to describe his "creative process," he delivers a complex monologue that boils down to "I make it up as I go along." Crayola Super Tip is his favored marker for coloring.

After Vivian brings up the supposed popularity of Sonichu among the gay community (evidenced by the [[Gay 4 Sonichu]] website), Chris declares that male homosexuality should be a crime, although "women are safe." (It's not clear whether he means that gay women are safe from imprisonment, or that he himself is "safe" since they don't represent a disturbing temptation.) He proposes that gay men be sent to mixed-sex prisons with convicted prostitutes and other female inmates, arguing that they will come out "reprogrammed." Pressed concerning his hatred of [[homos]], he becomes increasingly combative and eventually contradicts himself: "I don't mind associating with men, straight or homo, I just feel most uncomfortable being close to them."

Chris goes on to explain his hatred of the [[Hex Bawx|Xbox 360]], which hinges on his refusal to pay for online gaming. This is odd in light of Chris's enormous bill for [[PlayStation Network]] downloads. He shows a total ignorance of how the concept of intelligence quotient works, estimating that he has a world-record IQ in excess of 300, and seems to mistake [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger's syndrome]] for Alzheimer's disease while answering a question about his autism.

Chris's New Year's resolution: "Lose my Virginity with a Woman." Unsurprisingly, he [[Virgin with rage|failed]].

==The Chat==

10:30 *** Guest1 is now known as '''ChrisChanSonichu'''
 10:30 *** '''clydeC''' has set the room mode to “moderated”
 10:30 *** '''clydeC''' has opped '''ChrisChanSonichu'''
 10:30 <'''PandaHalo'''> hi chris
 10:31 *** '''vivitheg''' (~clydethel@Rizon-C55F0B46.hsd1.ca.comcast.net) has joined the room
 10:31 *** ChanServ has opped '''vivitheg'''
 10:31 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'm sorry for being late; I fell asleep after finishing the Episode Coloring; it is COMPLETED.
 10:31 <'''PandaHalo'''> awesome!
 10:31 <'''PandaHalo'''> how exciting!
 10:31 *** Anti-Goth has quit IRC (Quit: ChatZilla 0.9.84 [Firefox 2.0.0.4/2007051502])
 10:31 <'''PandaHalo'''> are you uploading it now?
 10:31 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> no, but I will this weekend.
 10:32 <'''PandaHalo'''> please do it now?
 10:32 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I have to scan the pages; takes Time.
 10:32 <'''PandaHalo'''> i'll send you a pic of my tits if you do it tonight
 10:33 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'm sorry; I promise to scan ALL the pages tomorrow, and have it uploaded this weekend.
 10:33 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> anyway!
 10:33 <'''PandaHalo'''> awww okay
 10:33 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> before I answer any new questions, I wish to readdress the Creative Process question.
 10:34 <'''PandaHalo'''> if you do it tonight, i'll give you pix of my whole body naked?
 10:34 <'''PandaHalo'''> and me using a dildo i got from the sex store
 10:35 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Panda, please; we're PUBLIC in the IRC.
 10:35 <'''PandaHalo'''> OH I THOUGHT IT WAS PRIVATE SORRY LOL
 10:35 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> at least I think it's private; someone please let me know.
 10:35 <'''PandaHalo'''> I COULDNT TELL BECAUSE OF MY DANG MENTAL BLOCK
 10:35 <'''PandaHalo'''> hmm
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> IF ANYONE CAN READ THIS BESIDES CHRISTIAN PLEASE LET US NOW
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> KNOW
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> I MEAN
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> okay yeah
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> im pretty sure it's private
 10:36 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> oh.
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> phew..
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> thats not something i want everyone knowing
 10:36 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I hear you.
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> but yes
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> if you can get it uploaded tonight
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> i'll give you some really horny pictures
 10:36 <'''PandaHalo'''> of me
 10:37 <'''PandaHalo'''> using a purple dildo i bought from the sex store
 10:37 <'''PandaHalo'''> it's a 5 speed manual
 10:38 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> since it's the case, as much as I would LOVE to upload the pages tonight; it would take me a DAY before the night to scan the pages, retype the text, create the html behind the page-turners before I can upload anything.
 10:38 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh
 10:38 <'''PandaHalo'''> okay :(
 10:38 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> you surly can wait one more day.
 10:38 <'''PandaHalo'''> yeah i guess
 10:38 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> please be paitent and understanding.
 10:38 <'''PandaHalo'''> okay sure thing boss
 10:39 <'''PandaHalo'''> did you know in england, they call pants trousers?
 10:39 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> please don't call me boss.
 10:39 *** yoko|l (~loganlapl@Rizon-15814DF.ok.ok.cox.net) has joined the room
 10:39 <'''PandaHalo'''> why not?
 10:39 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I feel a sense that I may come out as demanding when I'm called a "boss"
 10:40 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh okay
 10:40 <'''PandaHalo'''> how about snotwaffles?
 10:40 <'''PandaHalo'''> as an affectionate nick name for you
 10:40 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and I'm not feeling like I'm being a boss, but rather an employee who still has stacks of paperwork to go through.
 10:40 <'''PandaHalo'''> Ohhhh
 10:40 <'''PandaHalo'''> i'll call you my employee then?
 10:40 <'''PandaHalo'''> WHOS MY GORGEOUS LITTLE EMPLOYEE?
 10:40 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I do not like snotwaffles.
 10:40 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh
 10:41 <'''PandaHalo'''> what would you like me to call you?
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 10:41 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I thought you had a nickname for me from when we chatted on Skype.
 10:41 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh by the way.. i was looking at the server statistics for sonichu.net the otherday.. it seems traffic has decreased over the past 3 months by nearly 90% :(
 10:41 <'''PandaHalo'''> we haven't chatted on skype for so long
 10:41 <'''PandaHalo'''> i got on skype today but it said you werent on
 10:42 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> the traffic will go back up after I upload the pages tomorrow.
 10:42 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> oh.
 10:42 <'''PandaHalo'''> my father has cancer
 10:43 <'''PandaHalo'''> i'm really upset
 10:43 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> since I restarted my computer, I hadn't a chance to restart Skype yet.
 10:43 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> shoot. I'm soo sorry.
 10:43 <'''PandaHalo'''> it's so sad :(
 10:43 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I hear you.
 10:43 <'''PandaHalo'''> i get 80% of his 12.8 million estate if he dies.. but i would much rather have him around :(
 10:44 <'''PandaHalo'''> i love seeing him watch his race horses run
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 10:44 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'm sure he'll recover; my father survived multiple heart attacks and 3 triple bypasses.
 10:44 *** Guest is now known as Guest15055
 10:44 <'''PandaHalo'''> are you making a mean joke?
 10:44 <'''PandaHalo'''> cancer is nothing like heart attacks
 10:44 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I hear you; I'd hate to see my father pass away.
 10:44 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> no.
 10:45 <'''PandaHalo'''> the cancer he has is terminal
 10:45 <'''PandaHalo'''> and it's effecting him really bad because he has lupus as well :(
 10:45 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but my father did smoke, and smoking leads to cancer and heart-attacks.
 10:45 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> shoot.
 10:45 <'''PandaHalo'''> shoot?
 10:45 <'''PandaHalo'''> are you suggesting i shoot him?
 10:45 <'''PandaHalo'''> THAT IS NOT FUNNY
 10:45 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I don't know what lupus is.
 10:45 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> no
 10:46 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'm saying "shoot" like "damn"
 10:46 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> or dang
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 10:47 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I hope he recovers.
 10:47 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I will say a prayer for him.
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 10:49 <'''steventheeunuch'''> YEEEEEEES
 10:49 <'''steventheeunuch'''> Hey Chris :)
 10:49 <'''steventheeunuch'''> How are you?
 10:49 <'''steventheeunuch'''> I;m well thanks
 10:49 <'''XanatosVanBadas'''> Hey, Chris
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 10:49 <'''vivitheg'''> Server maintanence is completed.
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 10:49 <'''PandaHalo'''> sorry '''ChrisChanSonichu'''
 10:49 <'''PandaHalo'''> i was disconnected from cchat
 10:50 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I see.
 10:50 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> what were we just talking about?
 10:50 <'''PandaHalo'''> lupus and wiki
 10:50 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and?
 10:51 <'''PandaHalo'''> did you know you were listed in the famous cherokees section of the wiki article for ages?
 10:51 <'''PandaHalo'''> but they took you out because you hadn't updated sonichu in so long
 10:51 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I am soo sorry to hear that your Aunt has Lukiema.
 10:51 <'''PandaHalo'''> my aunt?
 10:51 <'''PandaHalo'''> what the hell?
 10:52 <'''PandaHalo'''> my DAD has CANCER which is actually MELANOMA that has spread to his spinal cord, heart and lungs
 10:52 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> there we go; I was making sure you were really PandaHalo; since the message said PandaHalo became killed by Ghost.
 10:53 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I was testing.
 10:53 <'''PandaHalo'''> ohhhh
 10:53 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> anyway, I will say a prayer for your dad.
 10:53 <'''PandaHalo'''> yes
 10:54 <'''PandaHalo'''> hopefully jesus will stop this terminal cancer
 10:54 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I hear you.
 10:54 <'''PandaHalo'''> so about the other day
 10:54 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> the other day?
 10:54 <'''PandaHalo'''> when broke up with me
 10:54 <'''PandaHalo'''> and said you were going to continue your love quest in real life
 10:54 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> oh.
 10:54 <'''PandaHalo'''> remember that?
 10:55 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I do remember.
 10:55 <'''PandaHalo'''> what is your plan with that?
 10:55 <'''PandaHalo'''> i respect you did not wish to wait for me anymore
 10:55 <'''PandaHalo'''> and that's fine
 10:55 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I was not breaking up our friendship.
 10:55 <'''PandaHalo'''> no no i know we're still friends :)
 10:55 <'''PandaHalo'''> i meant like bf/gf
 10:56 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> the option of you still being my Girlfriend is still open; I just felt uncomfortable after hearing about you and Bob.
 10:56 <'''PandaHalo'''> why? so it's okay for you to tell me about you and that waitress.. but i can't do the same thing?
 10:56 <'''PandaHalo'''> I feel a bit hurt because I feel like you have double standards
 10:56 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I did not say that.
 10:56 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I said it was okay.
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 10:57 <'''PandaHalo'''> well you're uncomfertable with it
 10:57 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I felt overpowered by bob.
 10:57 <'''PandaHalo'''> how do you mean?
 10:57 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> because he was able to meet you before I could.
 10:57 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh
 10:57 <'''PandaHalo'''> he saved up his money to fly over
 10:57 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> that he was able to fly to Australia.
 10:57 <'''PandaHalo'''> he's not rich
 10:57 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I understand that he saved up.
 10:57 <'''PandaHalo'''> it took him 3-4 months of straight saving
 10:57 <'''PandaHalo'''> i just wish you cared enough to save up
 10:57 <'''PandaHalo'''> it would have been so nice to have lost my virginity already
 10:58 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I do, and I would seriously save up to fly there.
 10:58 <'''PandaHalo'''> then why don't you?
 10:58 <'''PandaHalo'''> as soon as i meet you with can both lose our virginities.. but now i think since bob flew over and you didnt that maybe i shouldn't save myself for when i get to america
 10:58 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I will save up.
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> but i should let bob shove his big thick hard cock into my tight little pussy and make me scream with the pain I'll feel as his cock stretches my pussy to bounds it's never known before
 10:59 *** '''Polly''' (cgiirc@Rizon-BA24EDCB.asm.bellsouth.net) has joined the room
 10:59 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but I also need to learn about what I need to do to fly over there; passports and such.
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> ohhhh
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> okay
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> :)
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> well that makes me feel much better
 10:59 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I felt uncomfortable leaving, because I lacked that knowledge.
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> you could have asked me
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> i would have helped you
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> you can ALWAYS come to me for help
 10:59 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I apologize for not being so clear.
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh
 10:59 <'''PandaHalo'''> :)
 11:00 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I had to figure out the right words to match my feelings.
 11:00 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> plus, there's my family and their concerns of my safety.
 11:00 <'''PandaHalo'''> i hope the popularity of sonichu site goes back up after the next comic
 11:00 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and I don't have your HOME address.
 11:00 <'''PandaHalo'''> i'm really worried that it's losing fans
 11:00 <'''PandaHalo'''> It's lot 25 Cut Hill Road, Kangarilla, South Australia
 11:01 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'm not worried; once someone likes something, they will most likely will return.
 11:01 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> cool.
 11:01 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I will write that down.
 11:01 <'''PandaHalo'''> it's in the country though so mail doesn't get delivered there
 11:01 <'''PandaHalo'''> which is why we have PO Boxes
 11:02 <'''PandaHalo'''> Kangarilla sounds like a cross between a Kangaroo and a Gorilla
 11:02 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I understand.
 11:02 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> yeah, that's funny. :)
 11:02 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> how about Koffingroo
 11:02 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> ?
 11:03 <'''PandaHalo'''> Virginia sounds like a cross between Virgin and Vagina
 11:03 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> that's my mix between a Koffing and a Kangraroo; I've made a Pokemon card of Koffingroo long ago.
 11:03 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> lol
 11:03 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh cool
 11:04 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Sarah, I still would like a nice headshot picture of you.
 11:04 <'''PandaHalo'''> i gave you two before
 11:04 <'''PandaHalo'''> i will give you some more
 11:04 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> thank you.
 11:04 <'''PandaHalo'''> i might take one of me and bob together if i can find my camera
 11:04 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh.. another important thing about australia.. WE DRIVE ON THE LEFT :O
 11:04 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I remember the two pictures you showed me before, but I didn't download them at the time.
 11:05 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh :(
 11:05 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I hear you.
 11:05 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and Sasha.
 11:05 <'''PandaHalo'''> so tell me what is your plan with your love quest
 11:05 <'''PandaHalo'''> where are you gonna go to find girls?
 11:05 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I think that was your dog's name.
 11:05 <'''PandaHalo'''> yep
 11:05 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> good.
 11:06 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> let me think.
 11:07 <'''PandaHalo'''> ...
 11:07 <'''PandaHalo'''> should i come back in 3 hours?
 11:07 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> another detail that came to mind earlier was that you might have acted upon my giving the okay to have sex with Bob.
 11:07 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh
 11:07 <'''PandaHalo'''> nah i havent yet
 11:07 <'''PandaHalo'''> you could try gamestop?
 11:07 <'''PandaHalo'''> because.. any girls you see there, probably like sonic like you do
 11:08 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I hear you, and please don't leave.
 11:08 <'''PandaHalo'''> okay i wont
 11:08 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I had planned on walkin' the shopping center again; the people over there have changed hands and long forgotten the past details.
 11:09 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> also, with a red name sticker with the word "Single" on it (an optional idea).
 11:09 <'''PandaHalo'''> that would be a good idea :)
 11:09 <'''PandaHalo'''> i like that idea :)
 11:09 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but then I've learned of the Sonichu Girls.
 11:09 <'''PandaHalo'''> and that way single girls who are also looking but get stuck because they can't find girlfriend free boys will be able to help you
 11:10 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh tell me about it
 11:10 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> the Forum, to be specific; one lives in DC, and some of the others may travel here to meet me.
 11:10 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> they are just the SWEETEST and most Understanding.
 11:11 <'''PandaHalo'''> i dont think you should allow it to stop you from searching irl
 11:11 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> They fully understood of who I am, outside of the comics.
 11:11 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> also, they understood my meaning behind Rosechu's Stripping Protest.
 11:11 <'''PandaHalo'''> http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Cherokee&oldid=256772034 <- you're listed under famous cherokees
 11:11 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'm going out IRL as well.
 11:12 <'''PandaHalo'''> good :)
 11:12 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'll look at that later.
 11:12 <'''PandaHalo'''> when do you plan on going to the mall?
 11:12 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but I've been feeling soo much better every time I read from that Forum page.
 11:12 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> it's like a big piece of heaven.
 11:13 <'''PandaHalo'''> how would you feel, if you woke up one day, and they were all in your bedroom naked and horny?
 11:13 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> you said you tried to become a member of it?
 11:13 <'''PandaHalo'''> yeah i did
 11:13 <'''PandaHalo'''> but i only just submitted my application
 11:13 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> ah.
 11:14 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> with your question, are the girls asleep or awake?
 11:14 <'''PandaHalo'''> awake
 11:14 <'''PandaHalo'''> and they all want you
 11:14 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I would be surprised.
 11:14 <'''PandaHalo'''> how would they be horny if they were asleep?
 11:15 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> they could have waited all night for me.
 11:15 <'''PandaHalo'''> oh
 11:15 <'''PandaHalo'''> what would you do?
 11:16 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Act 1, Scene 1, I awake from night's slumber:
 11:18 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I see the group of naked, horny women in front of me. the first thing I would see are multiple faces smiling down at me and multiple pairs of naked breasts.
 11:18 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Surprised, I'd take a moment to collect my thoughts.
 11:20 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I would ask the group openly, "How did y'all get into my room?" I'd guess they'd answer, "The front door was open".
 11:20 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I then take a moment to appreciate their gesture of coming all the way to see me.
 11:21 <'''PandaHalo'''> that's good :)
 11:21 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but then I'd see a sea of their clothing from blouses and jeans or skirts to bras and panties.
 11:21 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> on my floor.
 11:22 <'''PandaHalo'''> and then?
 11:22 <'''PandaHalo'''> i like this story please continue
 11:23 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'd say, "Damn. couldn't y'all have waited to us to get to know one another first?"
 11:23 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> they'd reply, "We understand you plenty, Mr. Chandler."
 11:24 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> "But I hardly can place any names among your individual faces; it would be wrong of me to take all of you at once as multiple strangers.
 11:24 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> "
 11:25 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> "or even one at a time."
 11:25 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Feeling like a King, I listen attentively as they each introduce themselves one at a time.
 11:26 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> But not like a King who rules over a whole nation, but a King who is Emotionally enriched from being understood mutually among an honest, open group.
 11:27 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> And after the introductions, I would feel better to take them on one at a time to better appreciate them all as individuals.
 11:28 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but who to start with is a question that comes up.
 11:28 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> do I "Eenie, Meenie, Mienie, Moe", or do I run from head to toe?
 11:28 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> And end Act 1.
 11:29 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and Scene.
 11:29 <'''PandaHalo'''> when will it get to the good part?
 11:30 <'''PandaHalo'''> Chris go on you're making me so fucking wet
 11:30 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Sarah, I have fans awaiting my answers to their questions; responsibility takes precendence over fantasy fun. But in a short answer to your question, I'd feel like a Emotionally Rich King.
 11:30 <'''PandaHalo'''> its like my china is crying from happiness
 11:30 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> then hold that thought.
 11:31 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> hold it until release.
 11:31 <'''PandaHalo'''> hold what?
 11:31 <'''PandaHalo'''> release?
 11:31 <'''PandaHalo'''> what?
 11:31 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> the thought until you cum.
 11:31 <'''PandaHalo'''> did you want me to continue your story?
 11:32 <'''PandaHalo'''> and you can read it?
 11:32 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> in your imagination, you may write it out for me to read later.
 11:32 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I have a responsibility to the many.
 11:32 <'''PandaHalo'''> what did you want to do now
 11:33 <'''PandaHalo'''> i just want to know.. after they've all introduced themselves, would you rip apart their virgin pussies will your raging boner?
 11:33 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> simply to let me take care of my responsibility, then you can WOW me with your imaginative continuation another time.
 11:34 <'''PandaHalo'''> okay
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 11:34 *** Guest18376 is now known as '''ChrisChanSonichu'''
 11:34 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Hey y'all.
 11:35 <'''vivitheg'''> Sup.
 11:35 <'''PandaHalo'''> hi :D
 11:35 <'''PandaHalo'''> we're back in main chat now
 11:35 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> yep.
 11:35 <'''BlueSpike'''> Hiya.
 11:35 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> now, before any new questions, I would like to readdress the creative process question.
 11:36 <'''BlueSpike'''> I have a question for after you do so.
 11:37 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Starting from the last story piece, I conjure up a follow-up story in my imagination. Then I take numerous mental notes.
 11:37 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and eventually, I would take it one page at a time and draw it up.
 11:37 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> as for the in-between details, I let them come up as I draw from start to finish to build up.
 11:38 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but to set up a whole Comic Book, I start with the Cover.
 11:38 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> as it will set up and remind me of the story of the featured episode.
 11:39 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> example: Comic 7; Magi-Chan, pictures from the past, Sonichu Ball Crystals in a ring; Time-Travel Episode.
 11:40 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> After drawing, comes the coloring, using only Crayola Super Tip, as well as thick markers, which the Super Tips are avilable in packs of 50 colors.
 11:40 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> after coloring ALL the pages of the Whole Book, I write the completion date on the last page.
 11:41 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> then I scan each page individually into my PC.
 11:41 *** vate (~e@Rizon-6D44A3DC.ip.adam.com.au) has joined the room
 11:41 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> one at a time, I open up each page file, rename them, erase the hand-written text and retype with [[Comic Sans]] Font.
 11:42 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Alingment varies between the direction where the balloon/bubble falls into, but mostly it's Center Aligned.
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 11:43 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> After editing all the pages, with my HTML skills, I make up multiple HTML files for each pair of pages, to create a book-style setting from start to finish.
 11:43 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Then comes the uploading of the pages, then I update the Front Page of Sonichu.net, and that is that.
 11:43 *** '''PandaHalo''' has quit IRC (Ping timeout: 240 seconds)
 11:44 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Color-schemes, puns and parody ideas are best saved for another time.
 11:44 *** '''vivitheg''' has opped vate
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 11:44 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> New question, please.
 11:44 <'''BlueSpike'''> Okay..
 11:44 <'''BlueSpike'''> Do you think, Chris..You always leave right after your Q&A, maybe you can stay with us and just hang out?
 11:44 <'''BlueSpike'''> We really like you here, but it never has it!
 11:45 <'''BlueSpike'''> :(
 11:45 <'''BlueSpike'''> Sorry.
 11:45 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I apologize for premature departures, but it's a late hour, and I likely will feel sleepy.
 11:45 <'''BlueSpike'''> I understand./
 11:45 <'''BlueSpike'''> Do you think this day you can stay a bit longer? For me? :)
 11:45 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I do not mean to offend anyone personally.
 11:45 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I may.
 11:46 <'''BlueSpike'''> You can come at any time during the day.
 11:46 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I will consider it.
 11:46 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> next question.
 11:47 <'''vivitheg'''> Contrary to what you stated in issue 8, the age of consent in most of the United States is BELOW 18. What is your opinion on this?
 11:47 *** '''GenesisRosechu''' (~Kitty@Rizon-EA96D36D.hsd1.sc.comcast.net) has joined the room
 11:49 *** '''GenesisRosechu''' has left the room
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 11:51 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> really? I did know that, but it VARIES from state to state, as I have read on the internet, so I take 18 to be the NEUTRAL age consent number to rule by. as to how I feel, I would feel uncomfortable even dating someone under 18, as it may be considered a bad thing by most.
 11:51 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> plus I wouldn't want to step over a boundry.
 11:51 <'''vivitheg'''> According to the philosopher Kierkegaard, true individuality or selfhood means that to have direction in life, we must be aware of our true purpose as an individual, seperated from our current pleasures and distractions. What do you feel is your true purpose in life, Chris?
 11:53 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> to eventually be married to my Sweetheart, then give birth and raise my daughter, as God has pointed it out for me in my dream. Before then, I have carved out the subpath of being famous on the internet through my comics.
 11:54 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but not on purpose, but an accident.
 11:54 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> just like the invention of the internet.
 11:54 <'''vivitheg'''> We've been hearing about your creation's becoming more and more popular amongst the gay community. What are your thoughts?
 11:54 *** Pinwheel (~Pinstripe@Rizon-B9D10B68.rn.hr.cox.net) has joined the room
 11:57 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Firstly, The Comics ARE STRAIGHT, with NO PURPOSLY DRAWN or Thought-up dipictions to the contrary. How the Homos see it is ONLY from their Point of view; NOT MINE as the sole creator of the world and characters of Sonichu & Rosechu. in a nutshell, let them be.
 11:57 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Another thing.
 11:59 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls".
 11:59 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> that's my opinion.
 11:59 <'''vivitheg'''> How would you make it illegal to have ...gay men?
 11:59 <'''vivitheg'''> I mean, you can't force them to be straight.
 12:01 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> taken in and reprogrammed with multiple upon multiple pleasurable moments with female prison inmates and prosts.
 12:01 <'''vivitheg'''> Chris, that's just terrible. You shouldn't change the way God made a person.
 12:01 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and prisons will no longer be divided between gender.
 12:01 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'd be changing ONLY the men.
 12:02 <'''vivitheg'''> I mean, gay men just like your comic? What is wrong with that?
 12:02 <'''vivitheg'''> You go on attacking their way of life!
 12:02 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> it's bad enough they're mostly jerks, plus homo men are AGAINST God's will.
 12:02 <'''vivitheg'''> That's just mean Chris. You're insulting a huge amount of your fanbase.
 12:02 <'''vivitheg'''> How do you know they are against God's will?
 12:02 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'm not spiting them for liking my comic.
 12:03 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> look it up in the bible.
 12:03 <'''vivitheg'''> Chris, are you just angry because you have hidden homosexual desires?
 12:03 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I do not.
 12:04 <'''vivitheg'''> I mean, you seem to have a lot of hatred for them.
 12:04 <'''vivitheg'''> Are you sure?
 12:04 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I am positive.
 12:04 <'''vivitheg'''> I mean, I've never seen such a person hate gay men so much.
 12:04 <'''vivitheg'''> The only ones who have are people like Ted Haggard.
 12:04 <'''vivitheg'''> And we all know what happened to him.
 12:05 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> listen, I don't mind associating with men, straight or homo, I just feel most uncomfortable being close to them.
 12:06 <'''vivitheg'''> Are you sure it isn't because you have hidden feelings? :3
 12:06 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I AM SURE.
 12:06 <vivitheg> Anyway, what do you think of my book?
 12:07 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I plan on reading it, but I've been busy finishing the comic.
 12:07 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I will let you know as soon as I read it, Viv.
 12:07 <'''vivitheg'''> Alright, a lot of the Sonichu fans have read it and think it's fantastic.
 12:07 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> good.
 12:08 <'''vivitheg'''> What do you mean when you have Random Access Memory? Are you a computer?
 12:08 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> no.
 12:08 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but Think About It.
 12:08 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> when we individually think up, or not mean to think up anything, a thought of a RANDOM idea just pops up in our individual minds.
 12:09 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Randomly Accessed Thoughts in our Memories.
 12:09 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Every Person has RAM
 12:09 <'''vivitheg'''> What are your New Years Resolutions?
 12:10 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> :)
 12:10 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Lose my Virginity with a Woman.
 12:10 <'''vivitheg'''> Any others?
 12:10 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> none that I was able to think of at the time.
 12:11 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> so, just the one resolution.
 12:11 <'''vivitheg'''> What are your top five priorities in life and why?
 12:11 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Okay, #5...
 12:12 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Money.
 12:12 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> #4, Handling my life's stresses.
 12:12 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> #3, my family.
 12:13 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> *my family of my future, and my future.
 12:13 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> #2, my mother and father.
 12:14 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> #1, Me and my close ones.
 12:14 <'''vivitheg'''> My commonwealth of Kentucky is the largest producer of burley tobacco in the nation (burley tobacco is used to make cigarettes). What would you do to help the farmers transition from tobacco if you had the ability to send the substance to the moon?
 12:14 <'''vivitheg'''> from a concerned fan
 12:14 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> so when I'm looking out for #1, I'm looking out for me, my Sweetheart and my children.
 12:15 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> the patches that are currently available.
 12:15 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but for the jobs.
 12:15 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> move them to vegetable and fruit gardens.
 12:16 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> BTW,
 12:17 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I have given thought of sending the tobacco to the Sun, but then the smell from all that would likely emit from the giant star and stink up our Galaxy, possibly shortening the lifespan not only around our world, but the other 8 planets as well.
 12:17 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> next question.
 12:17 <'''vivitheg'''> A lot of your fans have Xbox360s and would love to play Xbox live games with you, are you willing to get an Xbox?
 12:17 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> no.
 12:18 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> not because of the detest of the system, but
 12:18 <'''vivitheg'''> Why, the Xbox 360 has a lot of games that are on the PS3 too
 12:18 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> because the Live is costly.
 12:18 <'''vivitheg'''> It's only 50 dollars a year
 12:19 <'''vivitheg'''> that's very cheap compared to the ps3
 12:19 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and I'm already a subscriber between PS3 and Wii, which are FREE.
 12:19 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> PSN is Free; Nintendo Wi-Fi is Free.
 12:19 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Skadoosh.
 12:19 <'''vivitheg'''> Just because it's free doesn't mean it's good
 12:20 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> it's way better than good, IMHO.
 12:20 <'''vivitheg'''> Have you ever played Super Smash Bros Brawl online? It's terrible
 12:20 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I have played it online.
 12:20 <'''vivitheg'''> just because it's free doesn't mean it's good
 12:20 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> it was okay.
 12:21 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> besides which, I play solo most of the time.
 12:21 <'''vivitheg'''> Then why do you talk about the online features so much?
 12:21 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and internet connetion is still a fickle mistress.
 12:22 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I do play online as well.
 12:22 <'''vivitheg'''> Has your IQ ever been recorded? If so, what did you score?
 12:22 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> but like a third of the time.
 12:22 <'''vivitheg'''> Or another test like the SAT or ACT?
 12:23 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I have taken an SAT, but I can't recollect the score or IQ, but I'm guessing my IQ is in the 300s.
 12:23 <'''vivitheg'''> Are you talking about your SAT score?
 12:23 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> My IQ being in the 300s; INS about my SAT.
 12:24 <'''vivitheg'''> A normal person's IQ is around 100
 12:24 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> How high is your EmotionalIQ?
 12:24 <'''vivitheg'''> What is that?
 12:25 <'''vivitheg'''> I'm talking about normal intelligence, not this emotional stuff.
 12:25 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> like Social Skills, empathy, that sort of thing; I have taken an EIQ test in my Coping Skills classes in High School; Very High EIQ.
 12:26 <'''vivitheg'''> I've never heard of it and frankly I don't care much for it.
 12:26 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> then I take it you're not very sociable?
 12:26 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> *socialable
 12:26 <'''vivitheg'''> No, I have a lot of anger issues.
 12:26 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> ok
 12:26 <'''vivitheg'''> # We all know you have Autism/Asperger's. But exactly what type do you have? There are multiple types on the spectrum.
 12:27 *** Kojima-Naked (~Kojima-Na@Rizon-52AC0D56.hsd1.fl.comcast.net) has joined the room
 12:27 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Firstly, Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills.
 12:28 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and I'm High-Functionally Autistic
 12:28 <'''vivitheg'''> But you just said you had a lot of social skills.
 12:28 <'''vivitheg'''> So are you not autistic?
 12:28 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> it still sticks like the worst super glue ever.
 12:29 <'''vivitheg'''> I don't understand how Autism affects you
 12:29 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> *best super glue ever.
 12:29 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> go to autism.org.
 12:29 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> there's info there.
 12:30 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I will take one more question.
 12:30 <'''vivitheg'''> Where is Cwcville?
 12:31 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> in Virgina.
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> Recently, Ryan Cash's suicide note was found. Please take a look.
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> Dear family and friends
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> this is my final message to you, i am going to kill myself after my hero, christian weston chandler let me down
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> Sonichu was my hero and without anymore comics i will never be able to aspire to be just like him
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> i hate christian for deciding to not make any more comics and being lazy! all he does is play his stupid video game and not care about anything but himself! He's such a jerk!
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> GOOD BYE FOREVER I HOPE TO SEE YOU IN HELL CHRIS
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> Ryan Cash
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> [signature]
 12:31 <'''vivitheg'''> That was all that was found.
 12:32 *** Guest (JavaUser@F71217E8.8E057108.2DB4D571.IP) has joined the room
 12:32 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> Well, I have offered my sympathies in my recent [[CWC Update 28 December 2008|video]] on YouTube to the family.
 12:32 *** Guest is now known as Guest52369
 12:32 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> and I pray to God and Jesus.
 12:33 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> so I feel relieved of that stress.
 12:33 <'''ChrisChanSonichu'''> I'm sleepy; I'll TTY'allL.
 12:33 *** '''ChrisChanSonichu''' has quit IRC (Quit: '''ChrisChanSonichu''')!

{{FanChats}}
[[Category: IRC]]

Chris and writing

2012-08-15T15:55:15Z

King Starscream: /* Exposition */

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Image:395-HowThePKMNCame.jpg|thumb|right|[[Audiobooks|Look at that cover, goddamn]]]]

[[Chris]]'s '''writing''' is marked by many flaws that have persisted throughout his creative output.

== General problems ==
: ''See also: [[Chris and art]], [[Sonichu (comic)]]''

Chris's writing shows a juvenile, [[Slow-in-the-minds|simple]] writing style. Like many elementary school kids, Chris frequently pauses from the action to [[Autism|describe exactly what a character is wearing]] and [[Sonichu 8|expound upon trivial aspects of characters]] in unnecessary detail. This is counterbalanced by frequently [[Evan|glossing over things]] that may [[Sonichu Balls|have relevance at some point]]. Sometimes Chris would interrupt an action scene to introduce something that is completely irrelevant to its context.<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_0/Page_44 Issue 0 Page 44]</ref> Its overall presentation is consistently sloppy, marked by unwieldy turns of phrase and elementary typographical errors that suggest that Chris does not proofread anything he creates before putting it on the Internet.

Chris produces no preparatory writing of any sort for his stories, content to make them up as he goes along and putting the overall narrative at the mercy of his moods and fancies. He regularly changes his mind as to what the story should be and contradicts what has come before as he pleases, unable to comprehend why this would bother his audience.

=== Exposition ===
[[File:SchuComic10P3.jpg|thumb|If only there was some way that events and actions could be depicted visually, rather than as endless and tedious walls of [[Comic Sans]].]]
[[File:SchuComic10P65.jpg|thumb|For fuck's sake.]]
{{quote|Fifteen minutes of dialogue, and transformation, later...|[[Sonichu 9|Chris, not even trying anymore]]}}

As a writer, Chris is over-reliant upon exposition, to the point that some works (such as [[The High School Story]]) contain nothing else. Chris does not like to illustrate facts of his stories through example, and instead expects the reader to accept his every word as gospel, leaving no room for interpretations that are not [[TRUE and HONEST]]. Confusing dialogue for exposition, Chris believes that his level of exposition is normal in mainstream comics.<ref>[[Mailbag 19#Textwalling|Mailbag 19]]</ref>

In addition, Chris critically fails at the literary element "show don't tell" even in illustrated action scenes, choosing instead to describe what a character is doing between two asterisks. (The worst offenders are *CUTS VINES*, *CRASH TO GRASS*,<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_52 Issue 9 Page 52]</ref> *TELEPORTS IN*, and *MAKES GUN DO A 180*.) Apparently even he knows that his shit art is too unclear to convey an idea properly without an additional description.

[[File:SchuComic1.jpg|thumb|right|[[Mary Lee Walsh]] threatens Chris and Sonichu with a "Hee Hee" attack, which most military analysts seem to agree is ''not'' a particularly potent or spine-chilling threat. [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]], however, is widely believed to destroy everything.]]

=== Characterization ===
: ''See also: [[Chris and art#Character design|Character design]]''

Chris's characters as they are written are distinguishable only by the vaguest surface elements. Chris's view of ideal personalities in men and women is clear to him, and because he wants all of his creations to be perfect, his characters are barely-distinct variations on a theme. Chris does not comprehend the appeal of characters with flaws. His main response to the criticism that his characters lack personality is denial.

The indistinct characterizations of the Sonichu cast are reflected in their dialogue. Chris does not use dialogue to suggest distinct personalities and worldviews. All characters are equally capable of speaking as Chris does, and from Chris's perspective. Including the [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|children]].

This in turn leads to only three basic stock personalities- all of the males are shallow bastards who are only interested in fucking and enforcing Comic-Chris's [[CWCville|draconian laws]], all of the females are shallow whores who only want to fuck, shop and cook (in that order, no less), and [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|Comic-Chris]] comes off as a murderous, insane dictator of a militaristic city-state enforced by a paramilitary secret police and a pack of [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|super-powered goons]] with immunity from [[Chris and the Law|prosecution]] and freedom to commit any [[Sonichu 10|atrocities]] they ([[Gun Comic|and he]]) please, utilising a [[Magi-Chan|psychic hedgehog]] to spy on his citizens to make sure there are no [[homos|gay people]], and gleefully revelling in the pain he inflicts on those whom he deems unworthy.

Consequentially, any attempt at character development fails miserably. Chris marks any change in character by indicating in exposition something akin to "it just happened." With [[Blake]], who arguably goes through the most stark change in character (an antagonist becoming a supporting character), there is absolutely no moral struggle or any build-up to the moment he "flips." His sudden infatuation with [[Bubbles]] and an equally sudden mention of mistreatment at the hands of his [[Naitsirhc|master]] are all the reader is given for why Blake changed sides. No reason is given for [[Wes Iseli]]'s defection to the enemy ''at all''.

===Dialogue===
Chris only uses dialogue as an expository device in his comics in the bluntest fashion possible. Chris feels the need to include extensive amounts of dialogue in his comic, resulting in textwalls that demand type so small that they often threaten to become illegible. Textwalling is Chris's preferred method of dictating the story as he means for it to be experienced by his reader. Chris has defended this practice due to feeling a "preference to elaborate, because [[Chris|some people]] [[Autism|rarely get visual references]]."<ref>[[Mailbag 19#Textwalling]]</ref> On a similar note, speech often includes hand-drawn emoticons to display what the speaker is feeling, affirming the notion that Chris doesn't believe that his artwork or dialogue alone can convey his ideas, in addition to his [[Autism|total ineptitude with emotions]].

=== Plot and Drama ===
Chris's [[Chris and reality#Fantasy and Fiction|confused understanding]] of reality and fantasy affects his ability to write captivating fiction. Because Chris considers his creations to be "alive" in some parallel universe, he finds that giving them artificially happy and uncomplicated lives is satisfying, and assumes that his [[True and Loyal Fanbase|TRUE and LOYAL fanbase]] shares this interest.

Chris seeks to avoid tension or suspense that would trouble his creations and his intended audience wherever possible. Thus, he is unwilling to depict his characters in peril that is convincing, and therefore, "real," and wants to pair them off early and dwell on their long, idyllic romances. Villains tend to put up laughably little challenge, and the protagonists usually win with a show of devastating and effortless force. Initially villains are allowed to posture about a little before Sonichu shows up to ruin their shit, but as the comic goes on and Chris comes into conflict with internet trolls, the battles become even ''shorter'' and ''less-climactic'' for the sake of emphasis.

Similarly, previews and allusions to the future always emphasize victory over the forces of evil. A vision of the PVCC attacking CWCville ends with Chris saying "Good, we've won!" A preview for a next issue tersely concludes the only marginally dramatic plot arc: "Next issue I get out of the time void." His devotion to dismantling tension is such that in [[Sonichu 10]], Magi-Chan broke the fourth wall to prematurely reveal that he would eventually fall in love with Silvana, presumably so that readers would not have to worry about what would happen to them in the meantime. Even the worst writers would never use the words "spoiler alert" in one's own work (with experienced ones instead opting for foreshadowing), but Chris feels it necessary to spoil a yet-to-be-revealed plot point ''in his own comic''.

As you might guess, on top of everything else this makes the storyline for Sonichu '''unspeakably boring.'''

The actual plotting for Sonichu is problematic as well. As soon as Chris becomes uninterested in an idea he presents in his comic, he will resolve it in a quick and often unsatisfying manner. Characters once meant to enter the main cast, such as [[Ivy]], will then be killed off-panel so that Chris can proceed to his newest internet girlf... ahem, plotline of interest. Other narrative threads (such as [[Meg-chan]], [[Blanca]] or [[Jiggliami]]) can be forgotten and abandoned entirely with, if the reader is lucky, a sentence or two tying up the loose end.

When Chris adds something to a Sonichu comic due to the pressure of another party, he is known to make these additions unsatisfying on purpose for the parties requesting them. The most stupefying example may be the Time Void subplot. Written in after criticism that his alter-ego took up too much of the comic's time, Chris ''almost'' removes himself for ''almost'' two issues, and when it ends, it just so happens to leave him ready to indulge in the most self-servicing revenge fantasy yet.

=== Visual clarity ===
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|right|An example of Chris's mind-boggling ability to make a completely unreadable page, hosted by what appears to be [[Chris and Religion|Father Christmas and Chris with a beard.]]]]
[[Image:SchuComic9P92.jpg|thumb|left|Holy balls, try reading ''this''.]]
[[IMage:MSCPython.jpg|thumb|right|Witty banter is considerably less funny when it's blatantly ripped off ''and'' you have to follow the numbers.]]

Like many children, Chris is unconcerned with making his comics clear and easily read. Chris does not plan page layouts in advance, and instead draws panels one at a time, cramming however many he can onto the page and further harming his comic's visual clarity. He does not understand that word balloons and text boxes must be arranged left to right and top to bottom in the intended order in each panel, and that the panel's art must be set to accommodate that order. The dialogue flow in panels with multiple word balloons in Sonichu regularly must be pieced together from context clues by the reader. The worst example of this is seen below: Chris establishing a reading order by numbering lines of dialogue.

== Chris as a poet and lyricist ==
: ''See also: [[Chris and music]]''

{{quote|I’d lay her down caress her gently tickle her fancy; have her tickle my fancy, and give it to her with the learned lonely experience I’ve endured.|Chris, expertly stirring feelings of both mild disgust and confusion<ref>For My True Love, I Would…</ref>}}

In poem and lyric, Chris has a poor understanding of the anatomy of an appealing composition. He mistakes exceedingly saccharine language for the romantic. He also pads out gaps with [[random-access humor]] and [[I Love Lucy|curiously dated language]].

He has total disregard for proper meter, and rhymes are forced with odd terms (''Rosey, as often as birds tweet/will you be my lovely heartsweet?''<ref>[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]</ref>). Sometimes, these reaches don't even rhyme (''Heart-broken, sad and very lonely,/I may never remove my virginity.'')<ref>[[Saddest Heart in the World]]</ref>.

Not even the Bard is safe from Chris's fail. In [[Sub-Episode 3]], a famous line from ''[[wikipedia:Macbeth|Macbeth]]'' has a couplet of Chris's making tacked on to its end (I shatter hearts as I please! I hurt them hard with the greatest of ease!<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_4/Page_20 Issue 4 Page 20]</ref>), while [[Bubbles]] mutilates a line from the ''[[Wikipedia:The Tempest|The Tempest]]'' in ''[[Sonichu 8]]''.<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_8/Page_95 Issue 8 Page 95] (paraphrasing Miranda's famous line, "O brave new world, That has such people in't!")</ref> Needless to say, the contrast is not that hard to see.

== Chris as a journalist ==
[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg|left|thumb|"Yellow journalism" gone oh so horribly wrong]]

''[[Nintendo Power]]'' was a publication released by [[Nintendo]] about Nintendo products. It sought to inform video game enthusiasts anything they might want to know about Nintendo products, and how they should feel about them. It is easily Chris's single greatest journalistic influence. To this day, he seeks to plainly tell the masses what the truth is and how we should feel about it.

Chris's first notable work of journalism is his final project in high school, [[A Week With Christian Chandler]]. It is a prime example of Chris's understanding of [[honesty]]: the only thing that could reflect poorly on him in his mind was the omission of any fact. Here it would seem that Chris is unwilling to massage the truth because he had yet to experience disapproval of peers that concerned him as the reactions of Internet trolls would later.

Chris's next journalistic effort came in college with ''[[Sonichu's News Dash!]]'', which presumed that his person and daily life were of inherent reader interest.

== Chris as a blogger ==
Chris's blogging is a continuation of his ''News Dash!'' mentioned above. In a way, Chris's first and most frequently updated blog was [[CWC's Sonichu Site!‎|his web page]], in which he posted "updates" about his goings-on. The site, however, was not in what most people would consider a blog format. Instead, Chris stuck new updates wherever he could find new space that day, resulting an erratic and bizarre page layout.

He has also experimented with conventional blog formats, and the results are only marginally easier to read.

To this date Chris has had several actual blogs:
*[[PSN Blogs]]
*[[The OFFICIAL Sonichu & Rosechu Blog]]
*[[MySpace|A small MySpace Blog]]
*[[CWC Blog]]
*[[Twitter]]

The location may change, but the [[Autism|style is consistent and unmistakable]]. This may be linked to Chris not knowing exactly the purpose of a blog. Ideally, you're publishing your opinions and [[Love Quest|experiences]] in a group setting, allowing constant meaningful communication. While Chris has no problems [[CWCipedia|sharing intimate details about his life]], he doesn't seem to get the communicative part. Blogs are just another place for him to spew truth and [[honesty]].

Another, arguably more important fault is that '''Chris's blogs are fucking boring.''' Most bloggers realize that if you have to spew about your pathetic life, you'd better make it interesting. While Chris does release the occasional [[PSN Blogs#31 July 2007 16:37 — PaRappin Reviews of the Top 10!|laugh]], most entries are outright [[CWC Blog#24 August 2009|annoying]].

Arguably the most notable blog ever made by Chris was the infamous [[PSN Blogs#4 August 2007 — Adam Stackhouse!!!|Adam Stackhouse blog]]. Seething with [[anger]], Chris shows that — just like with [[Wikipedia]] — he doesn't want to contribute, but enforce his beliefs on anyone who will listen.

{{quote|In any case, I LOATHE Adam and his Sister for STEALING my one chance at taking my Sweet Gal-Friend to Seattle; it would have been terriffic. I might have even been able to change her outlook on not planning on having children (she and I are both virgins; although I am a FRUSTRATED, High-Functionally AUTISTIC, 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN. And I LOATHE Surybuchwald and Aprelewsky as well, because their MUSIC probably landed those [[JERKS]] in 2nd and 3rd.|Chris, demonstrating his able skills as net citizen}}

== Chris's reading habits ==

Anyone who wants to be a good writer must be well-read. It's one of the most natural ways to become acquainted with good style, the elements of a plot, and correct spelling. Chris's [[Chris and his ego|ego]] is so inflated that he thinks he can produce something [[Honor roll|brilliant]] with no effort whatsoever. The only books Chris has ever been seen reading are paperback ''Goosebumps'' and ''Fear Street'' novels which are notable only for their sheer mediocrity. Chris read these books, which were written for elementary schoolers, well into high school. During the [[Father Call]], Chris said that he read ''[[Wikipedia: To Kill a Mockingbird|To Kill a Mockingbird]]'' a month prior, which is almost certainly because it was assigned in [[Manchester High School|high school]]. This was almost instantly proven false when he confused it with ''Of Mice and Men'', another high school assignment.

== See also ==
* [[Chris and art]]
* [[Chris and English]]
* [[CWC's Diary]]
* [[R.L. Stine]]

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{Writings}}
{{Sonichu}}
{{Chris and}}

Comic Sans

2012-08-15T15:54:54Z

King Starscream: Created page with "{{stub}} You'll see a hell of a lot of it if you read this comic. '''Comic Sans''' (or '''Comic Sans MS''', "Sans" short for "Sans Serif") is..."

{{stub}}

[[File:SchuComic10P3.jpg|thumb|You'll see a hell of a lot of it if you read this comic.]]
'''Comic Sans''' (or '''Comic Sans MS''', "Sans" short for "Sans Serif") is a horribly overused font typeface that draws the ire of almost everyone who looks upon it. It was released in 1994 for use in MS Paint by Vincent Connare, but apparently [[Bill Gates]] didn't get the memo and put it in every damn program released by Microsoft that uses any kind of text manipulation. Ironically, the version of Comic Sans used in Microsoft products has serifs on several letters. The largest groups of people who use it for anything other than a target of mockery are middle aged office workers who think it makes the company potluck emails look more "fun" and children who don't know any better.

[[Chris]] uses Comic Sans as his de facto font of choice in almost everything he does. [[Autism|for some reason]], he just likes it entirely too much. Possibly, he thinks by using a font with "comic" in its name will make his work seem more professional. Or, perhaps, its prevalence in the design of horrible free website in the 90's sticks in his head due to an unchanging world view. In truth, the only time Comic Sans is ever appropriate to use is for children's [[Alex's Lemonade Stand|lemonade stands]] and [[Chris_and_art#Choices_of_materials_and_technology|coloring books]]. It is merely another in a long line of mistakes made in Chris's art.

==See Also==
* [[Chris and writing]]
* [[Chris and art]]
* Damn near everything with text he's made.

Talk:Anime Mid-Atlantic

2012-06-28T21:02:08Z

King Starscream:

==Monica Rial==
FYI Monica Rial is an annoying, mouthy bitch IRL. I'm not sure if it's because she's dumb or geniuenly a bitch. But she loves to slag off ex-employees and then leave butthurt retorts on Youtube when someone outs her. She did that on one of my YT accounts a few years ago.

No wonder Chris likes her.--[[User:UncleBastard|UncleBastard]] 23:43, 10 May 2009 (CEST)
* Hahaha, lulz. ^^ Well, it must be hard if the only stuff you get to do is voice crappily drawn japanese twelve-year-olds. [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 02:42, 11 May 2009 (CEST)

I wonder what would happen if she met Bruce Campbell? Then again, what if Chris met Bruce Campbell?--[[User:UJ1A1985|UJ1A1985]] 07:24, 4 September 2010 (PDT)

== dbz wiki ==

[http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Monica_Rial added a photo] --[[User:One With The Lulz|One With The Lulz]] 22:18, 3 April 2010 (UTC)

== Tasakeru ==

I get as many lulz from Chris as you guys do, but my website has nothing to do with him, with Sonic, or with the fans of either. Please remove the link to my site and the excerpt from it from this page, as I'd rather not be associated with the man-child if I can help it. [[User:BHS|BHS]] 09:19, 08 November 2010 (CEST)

*That seems entirely reasonable, and I agree- it didn't really have any relevance to anything as far as I could see. I know the admins are cracking down on irrelevant stuff like this post so OHSHI- --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 06:23, 8 November 2010 (PST)

== Why he hasn't returned ==
I think Chris doesn't go to AMA any more because it moved. It left the Richmond area for Arlington, then Hampton after that didn't work out, and now takes place in Chesapeake. I think he quit going isn't because he lost interest, but because his fat ass is too lazy to leave the Charlottesville area and two hour drive would be too much stress for him. Hell, my first year going was the last year he went, and thankfully I don't remember seeing him --[[User:King Starscream|King Starscream]] 14:02, 28 June 2012 (PDT)

Talk:List of Chris's Rhapsody.com downloads

2012-06-28T20:57:22Z

King Starscream:

Almost all completely predictable, but what the heck, I figured may as well document it. If I've accidentally mixed in any of the troll-purchased songs, please do fix that. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 01:10, 3 November 2009 (CET)
*none of these were troll bought [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 05:59, 3 November 2009 (CET)

Any chance that the Ghostbusters song was a mistake? He's said he doesn't like the movie, after all, and only cares for that shitty cartoon based off of the even shittier TV series. --[[User:King Starscream|King Starscream]] 13:57, 28 June 2012 (PDT)

==Covers==
Maybe we could add a column to indicate which of these Chris has done a music video for. Right now, the links don't account for all of them. -[[User:Whoreos n' Milf|Whoreos n' Milf]] 18:53, 4 February 2010 (UTC)