CWCki - User contributions [en]

https://sonichu.com/w/api.php?action=feedcontributions&feedformat=atom&user=KitchenSink3 CWCki - User contributions [en] 2026-04-15T23:35:50Z User contributions MediaWiki 1.37.6 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Trollin_Train&diff=133236 Trollin Train 2011-02-03T16:40:34Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Hey, the Equipment and the Digging (Thu 26 Aug 2010 5:12 AM)] */</p> <hr /> <div>'''Trollin Train''' was a fake [[troll]] forum, established on 27 [[July 2010]], which Chris frequented under the trollsona "[[JenkinsJinkies]]." He eventually gave up on posting, afraid that when [[jerkops]] "busted" the forum they would mistake him for a [[troll]]. Trollin Train is an excellent example of both Chris's [[Naive|naïveté]] and his [[ego]]. His JenkinsJinkies persona was instantly recognized by the trolls due to his narrow grasp of [[Chris and English|the English language]], and taken advantage of from the start. Furthermore, his arrogance led him to believe that all of the trolls had immediately fallen for his ruse and that a fourteen-year-old sodomist who had moved in ''directly'' across the street from Chris would fit in perfectly with the secret trolling circle (because in [[Chris and Reality|Chris's mind]], all trolls are really angsty gay children and not regular people with jobs and girlfriends who troll Chris in their spare time for fun). Needless to say, the JenkinsJinkies [[Manboobs|teat]] was milked for all it was worth and Chris went along without ever realizing it.<br /> <br /> ==Chris's Posts==<br /> ===Hey, Everyone! J.J. has arrived. (Thu 29 July 2010 12:19 AM)===<br /> A new thread in which Chris introduces himself:<br /> {{quoteboxred|First, let me say I am most humbled to be welcomed among my fellow Troll Kind. [[File:Smiley smug.gif]]<br /> <br /> Well, let me tell a bit more about myself for starters. My real name is [[Junior Jenkins]] (Scooby-Doo was the inspiration behind the "Jinkies"). LOL. I had a [[birthday]] recently on the 16th of July, so now I'm 15. I couldn't celebrate it with my friends like I would have wanted to, because I was hitchhiking my way to [[Ruckersville]] from Boston. I'm crashing at a house where I have some relatives there (They're the fucking Black Sheep of the family, and they're not close within the same house. It is cool, because they won't rat me out to my parents and siblings. Like I need another damn minute with those assholes who overlook me). And a better part, their house is across the street from [[14 Branchland Court|Chrissy's house]]. Sadly, though, the blinds to [[Chris's room|his bedroom]] are always closed, but I still get some sights of him and the family out of their house. <br /> <br /> I've arrived at my new home a few days ago on the 20th. I'll be spending my Sophmore year and so on in Greene County's High School. I promised I'd write to my gal back in Boston, but what happens here she doesn't have to know. [[File:Emot-dong.gif]] I'll have to make some new friends come September, but I'll be cool; I'm a stud! <br /> <br /> I'll also miss my favorite duo of dudes, Jerry and Dino. They taught me the ropes of high school life; they both were 16. I looked up to them (like I would have for [[Carol Chandler|my older sister]] if she wasn't such a fuckin' cunt). They were a [[Homos|gay]] couple, and they respected me as a friend only. I made it my Final Realization I was not gay with the help of Jerry and my [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]], Lisa. Sweet little whore took me in with gratitude on my 14th birthday. She had a few exes from [[Middle School]], and her mom was a Bondage Queen. <br /> <br /> Before then, I had a gay experience in Summer Camp when I was 7. My bunkmates were experimenting, and made me their mo-fo unwilling guinea pig. I was blindfolded during the whole thing, feeling an 8-year old's [[pickle|dick]] up my ass. I was not thrilled from the ordeal. But [[January 2010|last January]], I became curious from the recalling of the feeling, so I asked Jerry to show me a night. At first it was neutral, then he made out with me; his breath was minty with a hint of garlic from something he ate; it was cool with me. Then he told me to suck his dick, and I did; the taste and sight did not thrill me. And he sucked [[Duck|mine]]. He got a rise out of me, but then I started to feel uneasy. It was minor at first, and I promised myself I'd see this through. Finally, he was in me doggy style. As he humped me, I was feeling it both in my penis, and in my gut; worsening as he went on. And eventually, I embarrassed myself grossly. I came AND fucking threw up simultaneously. Jerry had not come yet himself, and out of respect, he withdrew himself and asked me if I was okay. He cleaned me, and my mess on his floor up. I felt soo damn ashamed, but Jerry was kind and understanding to me. And it was then I confirmed it for myself that I was not gay, and Jerry and Dino agreed with me. So with that, I was able to move forward feeling more confident in my orientation. [[File:Emot-spergin.png]]<br /> <br /> Anyway, after moving here, I have studied the times of exits and entries from the Chandler Chateau, looking for a pattern. There was definitely one with [[Bob|Robert]], morning for breakfast at [[Burger King|B.K.]] and afternoon outings to I.D.K. where. [[Barbara]] appears to come out mostly either in the afternoon or night; sometimes in the mornings. And Chris has no set pattern as far as I can tell yet. <br /> <br /> But I'll post new stuff as I learn them, some with (hopefully embarrassing) photographs of Chris as I learn and take. <br /> <br /> Smell ya later, <br /> Junior Jenkins "Jinkies".|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=579&highlight=#579]</ref>}}<br /> <br /> ===Hey, guys (Sun 22 Aug 2010)===<br /> Another new thread. Parts of this message were very clearly dictated to Chris by [[Bob]]. In it, Chris makes the absurd assumption that the trolls are animal abusers, and was snapped at by the trolls in response.<br /> {{quoteboxred|I've been keeping watch over Christian's house for any consistent patterns or LULZy details. I had seen none, even when I went over there while no one was at home. Although, I did mess up the [[cats]] a bit by stepping on their paws; the scratches and bites were worth it. All of the doors were locked (big surprise). Their garden was a big jungle (only half my height, though; about 2 feet high max). I found no incriminating evidence in their garbage. <br /> <br /> But recently, I made a call to their house and pretended to be a fan of [[Sonichu]]. Bob was bored I guess, and he talked to me. After mentioning the Trolls, Bob said to me, "Sissies that hide behind screen names and the [[internet]] are the biggest bunch of cowards and the scum of the earth. They are afraid to come out one-on-one, face-to-face. They would hide behind their mothers' skirts." Then he directed to one of our own he found out somehow, "Females are the worst; such as Miranda "Enjoy The Big [[Pickle]]" Cosgrove." That surprised me greatly, but in defensefor you, Miranda, Bob would be of no match against you. <br /> <br /> Then Bobby said, "Meet me in person at [[Burger King]] in [[Ruckersville]] Any Day between 9:30 & 10:30 AM, and I will talk to you and your friends and answer your questions. Christian and I are not afraid and have nothing to hide. We are [[Slow-in-the-minds|simple]] and above bored." We chatted some more and then he hung up. <br /> <br /> I'd say let's troll Bobby further to get to Chrissy. I went there this morning; he was civil and gave me some info on Chris, such as that he has a complete collection of [[Wikipedia:50 State quarters|the United State Quarters]] on a Map (What a dumb way to save [[money]]). He also calls Chris a good boy (I agree with him; he ain't grown up). And, ooh, this is a good one; Chris tried to roller skate, and fell multiple times, even though he did a lot better on Ice Skates at the Ice Park (a class he took at [[PVCCitizens]]). <br /> <br /> I'm sure the more of us that go to Bobby and talk to him, the more information we can get out of him about Chrissy for our schemes. <br /> <br /> I'll continue to keep watch and let y'all know when something new and lulzy comes up. <br /> <br /> Junior Jenkins.|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=953&highlight=#953]</ref>}}<br /> <br /> === Damn! (Wed 25 Aug 2010 5:42 AM)===<br /> In response to a thread announcing that Chris had discovered Trollin Train:<br /> {{quoteboxred|Chris found this Forum?!!! I agree with you, Miranda, what if Chris doesn't download our virus at all; he's reading our plans, he may just boycott downloading ANYTHING new from [[ModNation Racers|ModNation]] or [[LittleBigPlanet|LittleFuckPlanet]]. And even IF [[Sony]] doesn't read what he wrote, they are aware of our shit as well. I tell ya, he ain't hiding, he's snitchin' on us for the fuckin' "good" of every lazy fuck on the PSN. Anti-Viruses can be put into any next Update now. <br /> <br /> Plus, Chris may come out of hiding and make a video to put the close on our fuckin' repeated death rumor. And I have noticed something else, with my Laptop, I managed to use a bit of his Wi-Fi (it goes all around his yard). It Disappears Nightly, and sometimes Daily. He's Unplugging his Internet, keeping us out. <br /> <br /> [[File:Emot-frogsiren.gif]] <br /> <br /> I have to hand it to him, he makes it Frustrating to Troll Him. It's like we have to PAY AirFare or HitchHike Dangerously and do it Old-Fashioned with Accordian Cameras and shit like that.|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1011&highlight=#1011]</ref>}}<br /> <br /> The "virus" he mentions was in reference to a thread in which trolls claimed to be putting viruses into ''LBP'' and ''ModNation'' DLC that Chris would be likely to download.<br /> <br /> ===That plan is NO GOOD (Wed 25 Aug 2010 5:48 AM)===<br /> In response to a thread about digging up Patti:<br /> {{quoteboxred|I personally took a closer look at [[Patti]]'s grave; it is Harder to break in than [[Wikipedia:United States Bullion Depository|fort fuckin' knox]]. the body is buried deep underground with Cement Blocks covering the site, and her [[Father Call|HEAVY Dog House]] is on top of those Cement Blocks. I wouldn't be surprised if they Cemented her grave as well. Also, the site is Heavily Surrounded by Trees and Heavy Branches; it's like Deepest in the Mine Shaft with Cave-Ins happening all the time.|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1012&highlight=#1012]</ref>}}<br /> <br /> === Nah, dude (Thu 26 Aug 2010 4:55 AM)===<br /> In response to a thread about getting [[The Bear]] to call Chris "Mr. Poopy Head" so that Chris would have to rename himself to "Mr. Poopy <br /> Head Weston Chandler". The post was likely made in the wrong thread, as it appears to be a response to [http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?t=83 Christian Weston Chandler: 1982 - 2010]<br /> {{quoteboxred|Do you really think he's that retarded? To perform a Repeated Act is fucktarded. Like we ALL know he is alive; I am watching him, his family and his house daily; it is POINTLESS and Redickulous to remake the Rumor of his death. We should Not Repeat performances, because he will be Expecting them and Knowing very well to ignore the Trite Fucktardedness.|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1062&highlight=#1062]</ref>}}<br /> <br /> === Hey, the Equipment and the Digging (Thu 26 Aug 2010 5:12 AM)]===<br /> In response to the same thread about digging up Patti:<br /> {{quoteboxred|It's all no good; the neighborhood is Very Often Quiet. The noise will be heard by someone, if not the Damndler family; someone would call the [[Jerkops|Police]] on us for sure. Besides which, I was Haunted by the spirit of the dog AND the child Monday Night. <br /> <br /> I went over to Chris's house with a flashlight that Night. I'm trekking through the daylilly garden aisles, searching for more bad I can do about the house. When suddenly, I hears a voice, "Hello". I look around and see nobody. I am Terrified. Then suddenly, I am fucking paralyzed; my ankles and wrists are pulled to my left and right, feeling like there were other people's hands holding them down on a floor, and I feel a pair of hands on my Neck too; <br /> strangling me, yet I can still breathe. Then the voice comes back, "Hello, Mr. [[Troll]]." It is the voice of a child, about 8 years old. I struggle to look around, yet I see nobody. I'm fuckin' shittin' my pants here. The voice continues, "Do not be afraid of me, like the teachers of the [[Elementary School]] were; they did not understand me and my mind. I want you to understand my mind..." Right after, I see a lot of strange images going through my mind. Including the images of an [[Abusive babysitter|abusive babysitter called "Roache"]] locking me alone in a static room; a therapy session at [[James Madison University]]; the teachers, guidance counsoler and principal of [[Nathanel Greene Elementary School]] holding me down and taping my screams and more. I tried to scream, but Nothing came out; it was a Scream of Silence; I could not even utter a WORD in Normal Voice; Only Silence. <br /> <br /> Next thing I knows, I am knocked back onto the cement block trail of the garden aisle, by the weight of a big dog, yet there was no dog. Wrists, Ankles and Neck still being hand-held, the child ghost leaves my mind, and then I hear a deep womanly voice, Growling at me as I smelled the stench of a dog's breath surrounding my nostrils. The voice says, "Do not mess with my master, my family or me, you infidel!" Next, I feel the sting of [[Patti|the dog]] biting into both of my ankles, one after the other. At that moment, I struggle back, leaving behind the lit flashlight I dropped earlier when my arms were <br /> being stretched out. And I limp as fast as I can back to my house, closing and locking the door behind me, gasping for breath and dripping with sweat. I limp to the bathroom with the shower and look in the mirror; what a gross mess I looked like. And I see a Big, Red Rash on the right side of my neck, and rashes on both of my wrists, from the hands that held them in place. And my pant legs were ripped, and he saw on both of my ankles rashes, and Teeth Marks of a Dog. I tried to scream again, but it was another silent scream. And I was unable to speak at all for Four Hours. <br /> <br /> I have encountered the Spirits of Young Christopher Weston Chandler and [[Patti]], protecting the Chandler Household. I warn you all right here and now, Stay Away from his house, and Patti's Grave. It is NOT worth it to have to suffer the Nightmare that can render you as damned silent as the [[Autistic]] child. And Patti is definitely not friendly to our dark kind. <br /> <br /> [[List of Chris's lies|I tell you only the truth, my friends.]]|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1068&highlight=#1068]</ref>}}<br /> <br /> === Dudes, you are not gonna believe this. (Sun 29 Aug 2010 1:22 PM)===<br /> Another new thread:<br /> {{quoteboxred|Even I could not believe it, but I was an Eye-Witness to Chris Smashing his own [[PSTriple]]. I had just gotten home from an outing with my family, when at about 4:00 on the afternoon of this Saturday the 28th, I saw Chris walk outside of his house with his Camera in one hand, a pair of workers gloves in his back pocket, and his PS3 in the other hand. I was curious, so I followed him to his backyard, where I watched from behind the gazebo. Thank God I was not seen by him. Yet Fuck Me for forgetting MY Camera. <br /> <br /> Anyway, he had taken a busted Air Conditioner from his Junk Pile, placed his console onto it, placed the tripod to one side and detached the camera from it to get a close up of his fat face. I don't remember his shitty speech fully, but it was some stuff of finding peace within himself and was about to destroy the "vessel?" which held his "lonely, anguished self" from the past three years. Then he reattached the camera to the tripod, relocated it for a closer view, walked in front of it, put on the gloves, picked up the nearby brick and started WAILING on it. I was just all Shocked, I could barely move and believe my eyes. He was smashing the thing like asteroids at fucking Armageddon. He looked like he was not going to stop. But after a minute, he put down the brick, took off his gloves and turned the camera off. Also, he had removed the Removable cover with his decals on it; said he was keeping it as a momento or something. And he walked back to the house, carrying his camera and the pieces of his own Smashed PSTriple. <br /> <br /> I would have posted sooner, but I was paralyzed with shock for hours; it was Horrifying to me. And later at about near 10:45 that night, I watched from the window of my room as he laid the smashed PS3 on his gravel driveway, and recorded Driving Over it with both of his Left Tires, about 4 or 5 times! My Shock continued more. <br /> <br /> I finally recovered about a couple of hours ago, ate a Hungry Man Dinner; I could not eat at all since the first smashing. Then I remembered that I should really be posting this, so here I am.<br /> <br /> OMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMG...|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1186&highlight=#1186]</ref>}}<br /> {{The Internet}}<br /> ==Sauces==<br /> <references/><br /> ==External links==<br /> *[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/ Trollin Train] <br /> [[Category:Historical Documents]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Sonichu_8&diff=131379 Sonichu 8 2011-01-07T18:28:15Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Rage Against the Garbage */</p> <hr /> <div>{{Infobox/Comic<br /> | titleandissue = Sonichu #8<br /> | cover = [[Image:Sonichu8.jpg|150px]]<br /> | coverdate = 20 August 2008<br /> | finishedcomic = 1 January 2009<br /> | pagecount = 101<br /> | episodes = 17-18<br /> | sub-episodes = 3<br /> | previous = [[Sonichu 7|Sonichu #7]]<br /> | next = [[Sonichu 9|Sonichu #9]]<br /> }}{{Honest}}<br><br /> <br /> '''''Sonichu'' #8''' is the ninth comic in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comic series]]. Based on the cover, this was originally planned as a [[Rosechu]] Spring Break special, featuring both [[Blanca Weiss]] and her character [[Jiggliami]] as introduced in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. However, by August [[2008]], Chris's focus was entirely on the [[trolls]], and that greatly altered the shape of this issue.<br /> <br /> Chris unveiled Episode 17 in September [[2008]] without having first completed the entire issue, in a break from the established tradition. Rather than featuring a Spring Break story, Episode 17 presents a story of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] fucking until they discover ''slanderous mislabelings'' on a website called [[4-cent_garbage.com]], whereupon [[Rosechu]] poses for nude photos of herself to prove that she doesn't have a penis. When Sonichu and Rosechu visit the 4-cent_garbage.com headquarters to confront the trolls, they are accosted by uncounted lurid images before meeting the wicked [[Jason Kendrick Howell]]. Howell refuses their demands and kicks Sonichu's ass easily; then Rosechu strips nude for the third time and shoves her cunt in Howell's face. The purpose of this story is unclear beyond Chris's need to express his incomprehensible feelings about the world around him.<br /> <br /> In the end, the long-awaited Spring Break story would appear as Episode 18, although it would not be completed for several more months following [[Blanca]]'s betrayal of Chris, his subsequent depression, and the massive distraction provided by playing ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''. Chris would not return to work on the comic until he was told of a boy named [[Ryan Cash]] who, despairing of ever seeing his beloved ''Sonichu'' comics again, committed suicide. Ryan's tragic story, and the sadness of his mourning brother [[Clyde Cash]], prompted Chris to redouble his efforts, and Rosechu finally got to go on Spring Break in the dead of winter. (Fun fact: Chris has never gone on Spring Break, has no interest in any of the activities that go on during Spring Break (with the exception of sex), and will never actually know what it's like.)<br /> <br /> ''Sonichu'' #8 proved to be highly controversial, primarily due to the hardcore sex scenes between Sonichu and Rosechu, who had previously been described as being 16 and 15, respectively. Chris rushed to include scenes in this issue that would firmly establish both characters as being of legal age to avoid accusations of child pornography.<br /> <br /> ==Development==<br /> A few months prior to episode 18, several plot points were leaked in [[Chris Sex Logs|audio conversations]] Chris had with his then-sweetheart.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> ==Public Service Announcement==<br /> Before the prologue, Chris has a disclaimer where [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] explain the morals of safe sex education. A horrifying sex scene was cut out.<br /> <br /> [[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|right|thumb|The disclaimer, as it appeared originally.]]<br /> {{clear}}<br /> ==Episode 17: "Rage Against the Garbage"==<br /> ===Prologue=== <br /> {{Resources<br /> | title = Prologue<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_8/Page_1 ''Episode 17''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook#Episode_17{{!}}''Episode 17''<br /> | sonichusite =http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic9TVY7P1.htm ''Episode 17''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPMu06016Sc ''Episode 17''}}<br /> <br /> The story opens with random proclamations from Chris: <br /> <br /> *Sonichu turned 19 on March 17, [[2007]].<br /> *Rosechu turned 18 on December 22, [[2006]].<br /> *As of November 3, 2007, the pair have been living in a house in the suburbs of [[CWCville]]. The house has been fully paid for with [[Monthly tugboat|taxpayer dollars]] (although new Mayor [[BILLY MAYS]] may revise this item in the CWCville budget to fund smoking and drinking laws.).<br /> <br /> Worth noting is that Sonichu and Rosechu's house is yellow and pink, just like its occupants. <br /> <br /> Inside, Sonichu shows off his bare ass to the reader, while Rosechu emerges from the bathroom in pink lingerie. The pair engage in disgusting pre-coital banter, which may even be post-coital, since Rosechu suggests they just got done showering together. We also learn that Sonichu has a seven-inch (18 cm) cock, and requires "double-extra length" condoms for safe sex. <br /> <br /> The two filthy, subhuman monsters engage in what they call "Missionary Cowgirl", apparently unaware that these are two completely different sexual positions. Sonichu responds by saying, "I think I can hotshot. Insert rod 'A' into slot 'B'." (The slot line is [[Things Chris has ripped off|borrowed]] from an episode of ''[[Family Guy]]''.)<br /> <br /> In an illusory moment of mercy, Chris interrupts the action to discuss the nature of Sonichu and Rosechu's reproductive organs. In fact, the reader is subjected to a new kind of horror, as Chris clumsily attempts to explain how naked cartoon characters can have tits and balls. For the most part, Sonichu/Rosechu biology is a sick parody of human anatomy, with the following key distinctions: <br /> <br /> *A Rosechu's vagina or "[[china]]" is normally hidden from view by some hideous flap of skin, which recedes during urination, sexual arousal, or a "[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|psych-up]]" attack. <br /> *[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]] nipples appear only when aroused, "for sensual massage". This would mean that Rosechus can only nurse their young when horny. <br /> *Rosechus possess a "V-shaped pouch" behind their vaginal opening, which apparently serves the same function as a human uterus. <br /> *A [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]'s penis and testicles reside entirely within its abdominal cavity. While the testicles are permanently contained behind a "bone-like structure" for protection, the penis can emerge for urination or intercourse when the Sonichu leans forward, causing the erect penis to "slide out" purely by gravitational force. This presumably means Sonichu must be erect in order to urinate. <br /> *Sex may be painful for Rosechu the first time, even causing her to bleed from her hymen, but it soon begins to feel like "a sensual massage." <br /> *Sexually transmitted diseases are unheard of in the Sonichu/Rosechu population, which makes sense, given that there's fewer than twenty of the little freaks, and most of them were created abiogenetically. <br /> *If impregnated, the resulting zygote is gestated within the mother Rosechu for "a few months," after which the Rosechu deposits an egg outside of her body, and must keep it warm until the infant [[Sonee]] or [[Rosey]] hatches. This reveals that all Rosechus are [[Wikipedia:monotremes|monotremes]] (egg-laying mammals). <br /> Chris also declares that "most" STIs can be treated and removed, although it is unclear if he is referring to human STIs or bug-eyed furfag STIs. He refers the readers to local libraries and the internet for more information, and then returns to the hideous yiffing scene in the Sonichu household. <br /> <br /> Chris treats the readers to a cock-eye view of Sonichu's penis falling out of his pelvis. As they 69 each other, Rosechu emits disgusting blue fumes from her ungodly orifice, which Sonichu appears to savor. Sonichu finally penetrates Rosechu with his sickening yellow member, and Chris depicts numerous scenes of past intercourse between the two wretched creatures. Grasping Rosechu's tail, Sonichu pounds away at Rosechu's gaping hole, until the two finally reach orgasm simultaneously.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> ===Rage Against the Garbage===<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title = Rage Against the Garbage<br /> | cwcipedia =http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_8/Page_3 ''Episode 17''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook#Episode_17{{!}}''Episode 17''<br /> | sonichusite =http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic9P1.htm ''Episode 17''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPMu06016Sc ''Episode 17''}}<br /> [[Image:Chris and Rule 34.jpg|thumb|300px|right|"[[Chris and art|They look so life-like.]]"]]<br /> [[Image:Rosechustrips1.png|thumb]]<br /> [[Image:Bigboss.JPG|thumb|200px|right|"What a show!"]]<br /> Twelve hours later, Sonichu seeks out even more putrid beast-sex from his sow, but Rosechu is too engrossed in her discovery of a website called [[4-cent_garbage.com]], which slanders the good names of not only Sonichu and Rosechu, but their father [[Christian Weston Chandler (character)|Christian Weston Chandler]] as well. Rosechu shows Sonichu various drawings of them and their friends (in fact, the [[Rule 34]] images Chris himself uploaded to [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]), and Sonichu mistakes them for photographs. <br /> <br /> Rosechu goes on to show him the "apex" of the site, referring to numerous drawings of herself with male genitalia. Overcome with nausea, Sonichu vomits. Unable to distinguish fantasy from reality, Sonichu insists that Rosechu is female, and cites her photoshoot in ''PokéBoy'' magazine as proof of her gender. Thinking that the dickgirl pictures were created by mistake rather than malice, Sonichu suggests they "prove" Rosechu's womanhood to 4-cent_garbage.com's staff in person. He nearly faints with weakness, and Rosechu puts him to bed to sleep off the trauma of seeing cartoon penises on the internet.<br /> <br /> Incensed, Rosechu decides to retaliate by producing her own amateur photoshoot and uploading it to [[4-cent_garbage.com]] to balance out the dickgirl artwork. Her efforts are fruitless, however, as even more Rosechu-with-penis drawings are uploaded all the time. Rosechu decides to consult [[Bubbles]] and [[Angelica]] for help.<br /> <br /> At 1:45 that afternoon, Sonichu, Rosechu, and [[Wild Sonichu]] are teleported to the 4-cent_garbage.com Building in Clarksville, Tennessee, courtesy of [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]]. While Rosechu seeks to confront the [[Jason Kendrick Howell|head of the company]] and protest the website, Wild has been tasked with locating one of the [[Sonichu Balls]], which Magi-Chan detected inside (likely in some feeble attempt to tie this story into the overall plot). While Sonichu contacted the mysterious head of the company to make their appointment, the only name given was "Jason." In a pathetic attempt at subtlety, Chris depicts [[Thurston Howell III]] and his wife walking down the street to hint at Jason's full name. <br /> <br /> For no reason whatsoever, Wild expounds upon his childhood, telling some shitty story about how his father, a [[Scyther]], was captured by poachers in the jungle. He makes clear that he intends to avenge his father's death, even though he hasn't done a damn thing about it since the comic started. Wild turns invisible (a skill he learned from a passing Porygon), and slips into the building. <br /> <br /> Sonichu and Rosechu enter through the main door, and find a [[Beel|demonic receptionist]] in the hellish atrium of the building. He rudely directs Sonichu to the seventy-second floor (66+6). In the elevator, Sonichu angrily whines about the receptionist, until Rosechu reminds him of the [[story of Joseph]], and its moral of forgiveness. <br /> <br /> As Sonichu and his pink cum-dumpster ascend the building in the elevator, they stop occasionally to check out the [[4-cent_garbage#The_elevator_gags|strange things happening on various other floors]]. Why Sonichu and Rosechu would stop at each floor to look at whatever's going on is never explained, but they clearly react to whatever they see, meaning that they must have pressed all the buttons on the elevator controls for no good reason. Much of the material featured in these pages were images lifted directly from [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], whether Chris understood their context or not. <br /> <br /> On the thirty-sixth floor, Wild finds a Sonichu ball in an empty room. Holding both of his Balls somehow prevents Wild from using his invisibility power, or contacting [[Magi-Chan]] for extraction. Wild is left with no choice but to sneak out of the building on his own, which really isn't that big a deal, seeing as there are only three people in the whole place anyway.<br /> <br /> On the seventy-second floor, Sonichu and Rosechu confront Jason, who introduces himself as a 20-year-old [[troll]], and his companion [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]] as his "minory 17-year old woman," with whom everything he does is "illegal in these 50 states". When he bids the Electric Hedgehogs to state their case, Sonichu delivers a moving speech to convince Jason that the website needlessly drags names through the mud, and that it's morally wrong to troll innocent people. Jason responds by saying that the page will stay up forever.<br /> <br /> Enraged, Sonichu attacks Jason, but he is no match for the troll's awesome powers. Rosechu elects to withdraw, preferring to forgive Jason since there is no reasoning with him. The two leave with their arms around each other, and Chris pointlessly interrupts the story to explain how the two crimes against nature can touch each other's spiny backs without injury.<br /> <br /> Adding insult to injury, Jason tosses a [[pickle]] at Rosechu, striking her on the back of the head. Pushed to the breaking point, Rosechu crushes the pickle, strips nude, and leaps into the air to attack Jason. <br /> <br /> With ferocious roars, Rosechu lands pelvis-first on Jason's head, and wraps her tail and legs around his body, SHOVING his face up her [[China|vagina]]. With sadistic glee, she claws open his head and bites down on the wound, then unleashes a powerful burst of electrical power. Sonichu even says she "had him going." Though dark forces somehow sustain Jason's life, he admits that the attack would have otherwise been fatal. Exhausted, Rosechu gathers her clothes, and leaves with Sonichu. While he is impressed with her display of raw fury, Rosechu is horrified at her primal rage, and makes some mention that she "transformed" into "[[The Incredible Lioness|some monster]]," expressing concern that "this thing" won't overtake her again. If Sonichu were a better comic, this might be interpreted as foreshadowing, but since it's Chris, there is a 99.9% chance that this will never be mentioned again. <br /> <br /> Outside, the three Hedgehogs reunite, and [[Magi-Chan]] teleports them back to [[CWCville]].<br /> {{clear}}<br /> <br /> ===Epilogue===<br /> <br /> Later, Rosechu hosts a gathering of other Rosechus to protest [[4-cent_garbage.com]] and uphold [[Women's Rights]] by producing pornographic photoshoots. In addition to [[Bubbles]], [[Angelica]], and [[Lolisa]], the group is joined by [[Simonla Rosechu]], who supplies the backdrops for the shoot and volunteers her services as a model. The group is also joined by [[Zapina Rosechu]], a fourteen-year-old loli who desperately wants to [[pedofork|"volunteer her services of cuteness"]] to the project and join in the strippin' fun. Citing "the dumb laws<ref>While many argue that Chris is referring to "dumb laws" against child pornography, it is plausible he's referring to "dumb" child labor laws which would prohibit Zapina from participating in setting up lights, cameras, etc. for the photo shoot. In any case, Chris thinks it's "dumb" that a fourteen-year-old can't work, sexually or otherwise.</ref>", Rosechu refuses her help, but Lolisa offers to supervise Zapina as she uses the light from her mutant ass to illuminate the photoshoot.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> <br /> ==Episode 18:"Spring Break, 2008!"==<br /> ===Prologue===<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title = Prologue<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_8/Page_60 ''Episode 18''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook#Episode_18{{!}}''Episode 18''<br /> | sonichusite =http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic9P2.htm ''Episode 18''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBk_MebLB0k ''Episode 18''}}<br /> [[Image:LikeFatherLikeSon.jpg|thumb|right|Sonichu squeezes and kisses Rosechu and leaves her feeling [[Megan|extremely uncomfortable]]. Like [[Christian Weston Chandler|father]], like son!]]<br /> Apparently ''still'' concerned that someone will accuse him of being a [[Pedofork]], Chris establishes ''yet again'' that his characters are of legal age, this time by actually showing the birthday parties held for most of the main cast since Episode 17. Rosechu turns 19 on December 22, 2007. The [[Chaotic Combo]] turn 19 on February 2, 2008. Sonichu turns 20 on March 17, 2008. <br /> <br /> Finally, [[Black Sonichu]] celebrates his birthday in a private get-together with [[Bubbles Rosechu]]. Blake disputes that he even has a birthday, since he was cloned from Sonichu's [[Semen|DNA]] (and thus not born of a Rosechu's uterus, which is stupid because every other Soni/Rosechu were just shat out of a rainbow anyway). Bubbles, however, insists that he is a 20-year-old "starting straight with a 2-year old body". Bubbles asks Blake what he wished for and he says "It's already come true", where Chris is either butchering the classic teen film "Sixteen Candles" or the Family Guy parody of it. The two kiss, and Black Sonichu agrees to rendezvous with Bubbles at the CWCville Spring Break Concert on March 22. <br /> <br /> Chris introduces Spring Break by ripping off a gag from a ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode, wherein Meg Griffin tries to ignore Spring Break by flipping channels, only to find that every station is covering Spring Break, including the news. Chris repeats the joke almost verbatim, except he [[fail]]s to include anyone actually watching the television, thus undermining the premise. The scene is best remembered for the appearance of ''[[Excel-Saga|FQX]]'' newswoman Greta Squall, a hideously deformed woman with club-like arms and scars on her face which look like the numeral "2".<br /> {{clear}}<br /> ===Spring Break, 2008!===<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title = Spring Break, 2008!<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_8/Page_66 ''Episode 18''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook#Episode_18{{!}}''Episode 18''<br /> | sonichusite =http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic9P2.htm ''Episode 18''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBk_MebLB0k ''Episode 18''}}<br /> The story proper opens with [[KCWC]] DJs [[Jamsta Sonichu]] and [[Lolisa Rosechu]] covering the event.<br /> <br /> {{quote|We have a lot of great events and giveaways goin' on here today. Thank our mayor, Mr. [[Christian Weston Chandler]] that [[CWCville]] is a clean city; nobody has to go home drunk or somkey! We've got coolers and kegs full of our famously delicious [[CWC-Cola]], Diet CWC-Cola, Lemonade, Grape and Orange Soda, compliments of our local CWC-Cola Bottling Company, founded and opened proudly in 1985; three years after CWCville was founded by our mayor's father, [[Bob Chandler|Robert Franklin Chandler, Jr.]] You can enter to win a 40-inch Sony HD-TV from Cwick-Circuit City, or drive home in a shiny new '08 Chevy Camaro Concept. Also tonight, our rising star, [[Jiggliami]] will be singing her debut single, "War of Love" on the concert stage here at CWCville Beach. So stay tuned to CWCville, [[Virginia]]'s number 1 radio station for all this and a lot more!|Jamsta Sonichu, desperately craving nicotine and liquor}}<br /> <br /> Almost immediately, Lolisa excuses herself to take a swim. <br /> <br /> On the stage, Jiggliami and [[Blanca]] eagerly await their performance. As in their appearance in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], both of them babble incoherently about their music. Blanca maintains that she will wait for Chris to return from the time void — ironic, since Blanca had betrayed Chris long before this episode was uploaded to the internet. <br /> <br /> On the beach, the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] enjoy themselves. Like Franklin from [[Wikipedia:Peanuts|''Peanuts'']], characters with suntans are depicted with vertical lines for shading. When Chris does it, though, it just looks like the characters are shaking uncontrollably, teleporting, or just soaked with [[comeuppance|jizz]]. While Sonichu heads off to surf, the Rosechus lie on the beach. <br /> <br /> For no good reason, Bubbles explains that she has no need for sunscreen, because she is incapable of tanning and impervious to sunburn. This has something to do with her being a Water-type Pokémon, her body being composed of 90% water (which would be rather unstable in the first place), and her fur being capable of adapting itself to her surroundings. This would beg the question of how ''any'' Electric Hedgehog Pokémon can tan, being covered with fur as they are. Of course, in reality [[Honor roll|water does not have that effect on the ability to tan at all]].<br /> <br /> The Rosechus notice a mysterious black Rosechu, and later catch up with [[Megagi]] and [[Bionic the Hedgehog]]. [[Sarah Jackson]] and [[PandaHalo]] make a cameo appearance as well. <br /> <br /> Bubbles's sunbathing is interrupted when Magi-Chan contacts her to collect a Sonichu Ball from the ocean. Before she can get up to find the ball, Black Sonichu kicks sand on the girls. Rosechu threatens to attack him, but Bubbles offers to do it herself, and pretends to force Black Sonichu away from the others. While she and Blake seem determined to hide their relationship, Rosechu and Angelica secretly know the truth, and laugh at the transparency of Bubbles's ruse. <br /> <br /> Chris incorporates a drawing of Sonichu surfing by PandaHalo, yet he manages to dick up the continuity by drawing in different colored water around the edges of the picture. Also, Sonichu wasn't wearing his shoes earlier, but Panda's drawing shows him wearing shoes. <br /> <br /> Elsewhere on the beach, Bubbles tells Blake of her mission to find the Sonichu Ball, and they agree to meet at Pier 969 later for disgusting sex. Little do they know that the black Rosechu from before has eavesdropped on their conversation. As she transforms into a duplicate of Bubbles, Chris introduces her as [[Silvana Rosechu]] and explains that hers was the ''sixth'' egg that emerged from the [[Rainbow]] along with the five eggs that became the Chaotic Combo. Silvana's egg wound up on the Earth's moon, where [[Count Graduon]] somehow made telepathic contact with her in [[1980s#1989|1989]]. As Mewtwo mentored the infant Magi-Chan Sonichu, so did Graduon raise Silvana. In addition to training her in the ways of evil, Graduon "upgraded" Silvana to have both male and female genitalia, and enabled her to change her shape.<br /> <br /> In the Atlantic Ocean, Bubbles searches for the Sonichu Ball, passing by fan-favorite character [[Yawning Squirtle]], among other crappily drawn Pokémon who sing the song "Under the Sea" from ''[[Things_Chris_has_ripped_off|The Little Mermaid]]'', yet another thing Chris has ripped off. <br /> <br /> The Ball is claimed to be 5 miles (8 km) out to sea and 2,000-5,000 fathoms (2.3 - 5.7 mi / 3,700 - 9,100 meters) below the surface, which is impossibly deep for Bubbles to dive (the deepest point of the ocean is 6.8 mi / 10,900 meters). It's likely that Chris used "fathom" (6 feet / 183 cm) as a measurement of depth without bothering to find out how big a fathom was.<br /> <br /> Meanwhile, Black Sonichu buys condoms in anticipation of the nasty, dirty animal sex he intends to share with his revolting mate. Silvana, posing as Bubbles, meets him, and convinces him not to wear a condom. Blake agrees, never suspecting Silvana's power to ejaculate a "paralyzing sleep solution" during intercourse. At Pier 969, Blake humps the foul creature, never suspecting that cock is ramming up against Silvana's own penis, which is perhaps withdrawn inside hir vagina. Blake passes out from the effects of Silvana's cum, and she teleports him to a closet in the CWCville Beach stage. From there, she returns to Pier 969 disguised as Black Sonichu, and lays the same trap for Bubbles. What she had actually intended to ''do'' after systematically seducing and subduing the various [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|recolors]] is never elaborated upon. <br /> <br /> Before Bubbles goes to the pier, she hands off the Sonichu Ball to Angelica to ferry back to [[CWCville Mall]]. As she flies off, [[Punchy]] and Wild discuss their sex lives. Punchy wants to bang Angelica, and Wild seems uncertain what to do about his own loneliness. The two resolve to enroll in a Dating Education course offered at CWCville University, thus setting up the [[Sonichu 9|next shitty issue]].<br /> [[File:BubblesXSilvana.jpg|thumb|Silvana's eventual goal.]]<br /> At Pier 969, Bubbles meets Silvana, but before she can present her hindquarters for vomit-inducing copulation, she receives a telepathic message from Magi-Chan, warning her of the impostor. Why Magi-Chan knows the difference, and why he didn't warn Black Sonichu of the same thing, is left to the reader's imagination. Bubbles is skeptical at first, but Jiggliami calls to inform her that she has discovered Black Sonichu in the stage closet. When Black Sonichu himself warns her of the danger, the stupid bitch finally begins to put two and two together. Bubbles exposes Silvana by asking her to attack her with Black Sonichu's electrical powers. Despite the fact that Transform grants the user the ability to mimic all moves known by the target, Silvana instead opts to use her own psychic attack to simulate Blake's power, but Bubbles knows the difference. Silvana reveals herself, and teleports away before Bubbles can avenge Blake's manhood. Horrified, she returns to Blake's side to comfort him. <br /> <br /> That night, Jiggliami finally performs the damned song Chris had been promoting for four months. Chris credits Blanca Weiss for composing the lyrics on August 20, 2008, which contradicts the premise of Jiggliami performing the same song on March 22, 2008. Also, the song, "War of Love", makes no sense whatsoever, and resembles the sort of crap Chris writes all the time. <br /> <br /> As an epilogue of sorts, Chris establishes that Blanca found "her boyfriend" and returned to her home state of Kentucky, despite previously establishing that she intended to wait for Chris to return from the time void. Acknowledging his own personal life, Chris briefly discusses the three [[Trolls|women]] he was involved with during the fall of 2008. Chris claims to have been uncertain about which one to pursue, and credits God and Jesus for eliminating two of them by having [[Optimus Prime]] kill [[Sarah Jackson]], and revealing the second to be in alliance with the trolls. Presumably, this is meant to refer to Blanca, even though Chris has depicted her as his girlfriend in this very story. The third woman, [[PandaHalo]], Chris declares to be his True Sweetheart, and the person he would promise his [[sex|first time]] to, although he would abandon her for dead within two months. <br /> <br /> In a small note on the last page, Chris acknowledges the suicide of [[Ryan Cash]], and admits a modicum of responsibility for his death.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> ==Alternate versions==<br /> <br /> When originally uploaded to [[Sonichu.net]], Chris offered multiple versions of the Episode 17, depending on which link the reader selected. These were based upon the ratings system used for television content.<br /> <br /> [[Image:TVMA.jpg|48px|left]] '''TV-MA''': The uncut version of the comic. It was quickly unlinked from the site; however, all files still remained available.<br /> {{Clear}}<br /> [[Image:TV14.jpg|48px|left]] '''TV-14''': A censored version of the above comic. Mostly, this is accomplished by Chris putting photographs of bananas over Sonichu's dick, an orange over Rosechu's vagina, and blue stars on her nipples. Other objects are used throughout the issue to conceal nude pictures Chris took from [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. These lousy edits can be seen [http://www.mediafire.com/?tt0s91mnmez here]<br /> {{Clear}}<br /> [[Image:TVY7.jpg|48px|left]] '''TV-Y7''': A version which omitted many pages of the original story. Chris appears to have created "Rage Against the Garbage" with these edits in mind, as the TV-Y7 pages are numbered normally, while the pages featuring nudity and sex were lettered (e.g. page 19-A, 19-B, etc.). As the sexual content in the story was gratuitous and pointless in the first place, removing it did little to harm the quality of the work, except that the plot is significantly altered. Since Rosechu's faceraping of Jason had to be removed, the TV-Y7 version implies that Sonichu and Rosechu left peacefully, never to revisit the matter again. <br /> <br /> Chris would rearrange the content in the TV-14 version numerous times before finally settling on a single version of the story, with most of the nudity removed and Rosechu's facerape attack left in. The hedgehog porn was reportedly removed at the request of his parents, and Chris would later add a message to his site stating his solemn vow to never again depict his characters engaged in sexual activity. This promise was soon broken when Chris created [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]] and snuck all of the deleted scenes there.<br /> <br /> ===The uncensored scenes===<br /> <br /> By popular demand, here are the uncensored images from ''Sonichu'' #8, including the ones from Episode 17's prologue that now appear on [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Biology CWCipedia's 'Biology' page underneath 'Reproductive Biology of Sonichu and Rosechu']. Enjoy [[mass debating|fapping]] to these, you sick fucks.<br /> <br /> {{collapsible<br /> |Uncensored images from Sonichu 8 (abandon hope all ye who enter here)<br /> |<gallery perrow="5"><br /> Image:SchuComic9Page1-B.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page1-G.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page1-H .jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page5-A.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page5-B.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page5-C.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page19-A.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page19-B.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page19-D.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page32-E.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page32-F.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic9Page32-G.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic8P102.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic8P103.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic8P104.jpg<br /> Image:SchuComic8P105.jpg<br /> </gallery>}}<br /> <br /> ==Links==<br /> <br /> * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCjgNF0NTwQ Examining Sonichu & Rosechu Audiobook]<br /> <br /> ==Sauces and Notes==<br /> <references/><br /> <br /> {{Sonichu}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Sonichu comic book issues]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Warning_-_Naughty_Women_;)&diff=127977 Warning - Naughty Women ;) 2010-12-03T05:36:40Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Transcript */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]<br /> <br /> '''Warning - Naughty Women ;)''' (officially '''10102009 Warning - Naughty Women. ;)''') is a video in which [[Chris]] tries to use [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]], a drawing of himself [[Fuck Quest|having sex]] with three female members of his [[Guitar Hero]] "rock band" as evidence against allegations that he's a [[homosexual]]. He also specifically points out that one of them is [[Niggos|"half-and-half"]] to refute accusations of racism. <br /> <br /> Of course, by trying to pass a drawing off as a photograph, all Chris really proves is that he lacks the ability to [[Chris and reality|distinguish fantasy from reality]]. He also accuses trolls of being immature, while showing off a Rule 34 drawing he did of his virtual harem from a video game. Real mature, Chris.<br /> <br /> ==Video==<br /> <br /> '''Official description:''' Warning - Naughty Women. ;)<br /> <br /> {{Infobox/video<br /> | name = Warning - Naughty Women ;)<br /> | video = {{#ev:youtube|nR_udefSZt4}}<br /> | stardate = 10 [[October 2009]]<br /> | subject = {{Homos|text}}, {{Sex|text}}<br /> | shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}<br /> | previous = [[9 October 2009]]<br /> | next = [[Challenge for Clyde]]<br /> }} <br /> === Transcript ===<br /> <br /> Hmm, [[Captain's Log|Captain's Loooog]]. [[CWCki:DATING|The 10th of October 2009]]. <br /> <br /> Now. I would like to make it perfectly clear, but first I would like to state...THE update [''dramatic [[glasses]] removal''] that will be on the [[CWCipedia]] tomorrah-uh-duh-later tonight or tomorrow. A few more pages for the numb nine book. So, look forward to that [''short pause''] good viewers.<br /> <br /> Now, for those who DAYARE continue to mislabel me as dang [[homos|''gaaaaay'']], homosexual, or bisexual, uggh... ''[shakes head]'' I'm straight. I. Am. Straight. <br /> <br /> [''Chris approaches the [[camera]] by maneuvering around something off-screen, grabs the camera, and holds it close to his face''] <br /> <br /> And I tell you what. If I was a s-homosetsual or anything like that, would I not would I be having sex...<br /> <br /> [''angles camera down and shoves [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg|CWCRockin4Way.jpg]] fully into the frame, with strips of paper taped over the genitals and nipples, including Chris's''] <br /> <br /> ..with THREE WOMEN? Huh? Huh? Look at it! Look at it! [[Chris and reality|I'm having sex with three women]], and you know what? The one in the middoo is [[niggos|half-and-half!]]<br /> <br /> [''Chris points camera back at his enraged face''] <br /> <br /> I am STRAIGHT. Get through your damn dirty immature skulls! <br /> <br /> [''sets camera back down with a forceful thud, meanders back to where he was originally standing by awkwardly stepping over the object from earlier, takes a moment to set himself''] <br /> <br /> Thank you very much [''flashes victory sign''] and have a good day. <br /> <br /> [''bends down to the controller to halt recording'']<br /> <br /> ==Remix==<br /> <br /> {{Infobox/Fanvideo<br /> | name = Chris-Chan proves those slanderous trolls wrong<br /> | video = {{#ev:youtube|ZOpGtblij8Y }}<br /> | stardate = 10 [[October 2009]]<br /> | maker = AngusHiggens<br /> | subject = {{Homos|text}}<br /> | type = Remix<br /> }} <br /> ==See also==<br /> *[[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]], about the drawing itself.<br /> *[[Chris and sex]]<br /> *[[Chris and reality]]<br /> <br /> {{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[9 October 2009]]|nextlink=[[Challenge for Clyde]]|}}<br /> {{Captain's Log}}<br /> [[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Cole_Smithey&diff=127923 Cole Smithey 2010-12-02T17:37:06Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Internet infamy */</p> <hr /> <div>{{quote|Let me know when that fuck [[Bob]] finally drops.|Cole, [[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|24 July 2007 e-mail #3]]}}<br /> {{quote|I do not regret giving birth to Cole.|Barbara, [[:Image:Cole_07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 e-mail #1]]}}<br /> {| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"<br /> |-<br /> ! colspan="2" | Chandler Family<br /> |-<br /> | colspan="2" | [[Image:Colesmithey.jpg|200px]]<br /> |-<br /> ! colspan="2" |Cole Smithey<br /> |-<br /> | '''Birth Name'''<br /> | Joseph Cole Smithey<br /> |-<br /> | '''D.O.B.'''<br /> | 24 July 1963<br /> |-<br /> | '''Gender'''<br /> | Male<br /> |-<br /> | '''Nationality'''<br /> | [[United States of America|American]]<br /> |-<br /> | '''Race'''<br /> | White<br /> |-<br /> | '''Parents'''<br /> | Ron Coleman Yeatts<br /> [[Barbara]]<br /> |-<br /> | '''Occupation(s)'''<br /> | Film Critic<br /> |-<br /> |}<br /> <br /> '''Joseph Cole Smithey''' (born 24 July 1963)<ref>''[[:Image:046-ColeCDIn.jpg|A CD For Cole Smithey!]]''</ref> is [[Chris]]'s half-brother, [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara's]] first son, and one of the successful escapees from the [[14 Branchland Court|Casa De Chandler]]. Despite sharing chromosomes with Chris and being raised by the same horrible mother, Cole seems to be a pretty normal guy. [[Cole Smithey E-mails|Cole's e-mails to Chris]] revealed a lot about the Chandler family.<br /> <br /> ==Relationship with Barbara and Bob==<br /> [[Image:0467-CWC18th20.jpg|thumb|Cole smiles alongside [[Barbara]] on Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]]<br /> Cole isn't on good terms with [[Bob]] or [[Barbara]]. Cole was physically and mentally abused by Barbara and his stepfather Jerry with punishments such as ass beatings, cold showers, and "bizarre scenarios". Bob isn't exactly a role model either, as he worked his "bitter influence" on Barbara to separate her from Cole. Cole has "never met a meaner or more reprehensible Republican cur than Bob Chandler."<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 e-mail, page 2]]</ref><br /> <br /> Barbara has lied about the identity of Cole's biological father and related facts repeatedly, even on the night before Cole's wedding and even after Cole hired a private detective to find evidence that contradicts her claims. It turns out Barbara was never married to Jack Dale Smithey, Cole's alleged father, but rather Ran ''Cole''man Yeatts.<br /> <br /> Barbara visited Cole only once in 27 years, whereas Cole had made special effort to visit her several times. Cole's wife's family treats him more like family than his own.<br /> <br /> ==Relationship with Chris==<br /> [[Image:0468-CWC&JCS.jpg|thumb|The half-brothers hold their hands the same way on Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]]<br /> Cole was not around when Chris was growing up. Being nineteen years older, he was in California making a life for himself.<ref name="email07-03-06p3" /> Cole said that Barbara and Bob neglected Chris for years with the [[abusive babysitter]]<ref name="email07-03-06p3" />, which suggests that Chris's muteness in early life was their fault.<br /> <br /> Cole visited for Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday party]] in [[2000]]. Later in the same year, for Cole's 37th birthday, Chris made him ''A CD For Cole Smithey!'' Naturally, the present had little to do with Cole and [[Chris and his Ego|everything to do with Chris]], even featuring a picture of him on the cover. Chris further taints the CD by attempting to talk like a DJ.<br /> <br /> In [[July 2007]], Chris sent an e-mail asking for Cole's vote in the [[Chop Chop Onion's Rap Showdown|''PaRappa'' contest]]. In return, Cole asked Chris to find out the truth about his father from Barbara. Chris did ask his mother about it, but she lied once again. Chris was more interested in the ''PaRappa'' contest than his brother's plight, showing just how self-absorbed he truly is. This resulted in Cole becoming even more bitter towards both Chris and Barbara. Suffice to say, Cole did not vote for Chris. When Chris's [[nudes]] were sent from his e-mail in [[September 2008]], Cole replied with "DO NOT CONTACT ME BY E-MAIL AGAIN."<br /> <br /> '''tl;dr:''' Barbara is a whore and Chris doesn't give a shit about anybody but himself.<br /> <br /> ===Cole in the comics===<br /> Strangely, though, Chris still found a way to put his brother into his mess. According to the [[CWCipedia]] profile for [[Rosechu]], there is a "Professor Cole" listed, being the one who gave [[Kel]] the Pichu who'd become [[Rosechu]]. This means that even his ''brother'' is stuck in [[CWCville]].<br /> <br /> ==Personal success==<br /> Cole resided in California for sixteen years and has been in New York since around [[1996]].<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 e-mail, page 1]]</ref> Cole lives with his wife Katherine, is the self-confessed "smartest film critic in the world,"<ref>[http://www.colesmithey.com ColeSmithey.com]</ref> and plays wicked guitar in a jazz band.<ref name="email07-03-06p3">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 e-mail, page 3]]</ref><br /> <br /> ===Internet infamy===<br /> On 18 June 2010, Cole became the first person out of 131 reviewers to give ''[[Wikipedia:Toy Story 3|Toy Story 3]]'' a "rotten" review on the website [http://www.rottentomatoes.com Rotten Tomatoes].<ref>[http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/toy_story_3/comments.php?reviewid=1889775 http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/toy_story_3/comments.php?reviewid=1889775]</ref> (Only two other RT reviewers, a noted [[niggo]] troll-critic [[Wikipedia:Armond White|Armond White]] and "Movie Martyr" Jeremy Heilman, gave the film a negative review.) Immediately after posting this controversial review, Cole received hundreds of comments which relentlessly flamed his intelligence. This may prove that [[Internet]] infamy runs in the family. <br /> <br /> Notably, however, Cole's negative review may have a rational psychological basis and he shouldn't be judged too harshly. Consider these quotes and see if they sound familiar:<br /> <br /> <blockquote><br /> (...) the inappropriately [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|cruel]] and [[For Julie's Eyes Only|drawn out climax sequence]] is [[Sonichu 10|too intense for younger children]] who will be lured into the "G-rated" film." ... Andy is off to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]], and must finally put away [[Toys|childish things]]--something most boys do before junior high. Talk about arrested development--[[love quest|this kid isn't getting any dates]].<br /> </blockquote><br /> <br /> The same goes for his personal issues with Snorlax.<br /> <br /> <blockquote><br /> Andy's careless mom--whose sense of parental responsibility is nonexistent, "accidentally" tosses out the trash bag filled with Woody's pals on the curb. ... abandonment is a distressing theme smuggled into the story.<br /> </blockquote><br /> <br /> ==Gallery==<br /> <center><gallery><br /> Image:045-ColeCD.jpg|''A CD For Cole Smithey!''<br /> Image:046-ColeCDIn.jpg|As if Barbara had any involvement with the CD.<br /> </gallery></center><br /> <br /> ==Sauces==<br /> <references /><br /> <br /> ==External links==<br /> * [http://www.colesmithey.com ColeSmithey.com]<br /> * [http://www.rottentomatoes.com/author/author-3041/ Cole at Rotten Tomatoes]<br /> * [http://www.rottentomatoes.com/news/1716056/2/meet_a_critic_cole_smithey_the_new_york_writer_with_a_rock_n_roll_past Rotten Tomatoes interviews Cole.]<br /> <br /> {{Not_Jerks}}<br /> {{People}}<br /> {{DEFAULTSORT:Smithey, Cole}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Family Members]]<br /> [[Category:People]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Emily&diff=125451 Emily 2010-11-18T03:40:49Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Kiss fail */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:Emilyy.jpg|thumb|70px|The only known image of Emily, shot from behind.]]<br /> <br /> '''Emily''' is [[Chris]]'s onetime [[sweetheart]] with whom he went on a date. The date memorably ended in disaster when he was trolled IRL by the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]]; literally.<br /> <br /> ==Agent 99==<br /> <br /> Emily's identity is zealously guarded by her friends, but needless to say, we can tell you she's female and has great legs. Some argue she's Asian, but those people are probably [[slow in the minds]].<br /> <br /> ==Chris's first date==<br /> <br /> In [[2009#March|March 2009]], shortly after [[Julie]] turned out to be a 13 year old boy, Chris vowed that he would return to his real life exploits of stalking women in public places in order to gain his [[sweetheart]]. Emily, a journalism student and head of the [[Sonichu Girls]] Fan Club chapter at West Virginia University (and totally not a troll), decided to take Chris up on his offer and asked if he'd liked to go out to lunch sometime. <br /> <br /> Chris actually stood up Emily the first time because he was so [[stress|stressed]] from his parents arguing over whether she was real or not. [[Bob]] believed that Emily was sincere and truly wanted to meet Chris while [[Barb]] was more suspicious. Chris's small mind could not handle two simultaneous arguments and so he crashed into slumber. Emily was pissed off about this and demanded that Chris reschedule. Chris agreed and a new date was set.<br /> <br /> When Chris finally did meet up for the date, he brought his 81-year-old father, Bob Chandler along. Yes, he brought his dad on his first date. [[prom|At least it wasn't his mother]], though. <br /> <br /> ===Kiss fail===<br /> [[Image:0606-CWC21-2.jpg|thumb|For reference, this is Chris in his kissing stance.]]<br /> <br /> {{quote|Well, when I was going to ditch him for the man in the picklesuit, Chris had his arm extended like he wanted a hug. So I was like, "sure, whatever" and was just going to give him a half assed hug. Lord, what a dumb move. I'm a small girl, so I have narrow shoulders. His large fucking arm basically weighed down around my neck over my shoulder and tightening, and what I could see in the corner of my eye was Chris puckering his lips and his face moving closer to mine. I did a [[Chop Chop Onion's Rap Showdown|duck and turn]] to avoid it. If I seriously turned my head to get a better look, he may have well have gotten my lips. I wonder if that was what Chris was going for; the surprise kiss on the lips when the girl turns her head. Too bad that only works in [[anime]] and movies. [[Liquid Chris|Or really suave guys]].|The victim}}<br /> <br /> ===Video fail===<br /> <br /> This short clip contains the only footage that exists.<br /> <center>{{#ev:youtube|cl2LUzQYQMM}}</center><br /> <br /> ==Date conversation transcript==<br /> <br /> ''See [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]].''<br /> <br /> ==Post-date conversation transcript==<br /> <br /> <font color="#009900">'''Clyde:''' Sorry.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' What's up?</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' I think we need to talk.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Okay.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' Becau—it's not me, Chris. It's you. And, you know, I was just thinking about yesterday. I really didn't appreciate you, like, [[Megan|touching]] me all the time.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' I'm sorry, what?</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' I di-I didn't appreciate you, like, constantly touching me, okay? You'd, like, just met me, and you were touching me constantly.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Oh. I'm sorry.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' [''interrupting''] I mean, you should never do that to a woman on, like, you know, one that you just met. And especially when you try, like... You tried to kiss me, okay? That's not right at all.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' I'm so sorry, I was a little nervous. I was nervous, a little bit.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' Why would you try to kiss somebody when--if you're nervous? I mean, I thought, like, people would be nervous and ''not'' try to kiss somebody.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' I don't–</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' But anyways. Let me tell you about--</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Anyway.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' You'll probably ne--you'll probably never hear from me again, Chris, because the Pickle Man was just--he was a perfect gentleman, okay? He, like, took me out on a date and paid for my movie, and, like, since he kept his hands off of me, he got, like, a little extra ''extra'' from me, and that could have been you, Chris. Okay? So--and then he took me to meet Clyde, and Clyde's, like, a perfect gentleman as well. So I'm going to be living in his mansion from now on.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Hmm. Anyway, did you get back to West Virginia okay?</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' Yeah. Well, I didn't exactly go back to West Virginia; I'm going to be living with Clyde now, with, uh, with [[Julie]] and [[Blanca]] and [[Sarah]] and everyone else, Chris. Do you understand?</font> <br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' I see.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' Like, like, since... You don't understand, like, all the women that you've mistreated in the past, they're living with Clyde because he is rehabilitating them.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Hmm. I see... [''pause''] Well, I don't know what to say.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' So, do you have anything else to say?</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Umm. Well, this is the, uh... Well, uh, all I can say is, uh, I’m sorry about if you feel—if you feel—if I--that if I mistreated you, and, uh, somewhat, if you—if you felt like I, uh, did wrong.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' Because I don't know why-why you have, like against, like, these men in the… pickle suits or whatever. Because he was just a guy in a pickle suit. I don’t understand, like, what was so, like, threatening about him. And apparently you, like, called the cops on him? I mean, what did he do wrong? How you gotta report him? Saying that, like, a guy in a pickle suit's, like, stole your date.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, I think in the past, uh, there, uh, yeah, guy in the pickle suit posed as, uh, Blanca.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' But I mean--</font> <br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' And, uh...</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' You, like, didn’t know this guy, and you’re already passing judgment on him, and you’re already, like… You passed judgment on thi—on Clyde, okay? Clyde’s like, the nicest guy ever, okay? He is, like… He is gonna be, like, taking care of me for the rest of the li—rest of my life. ‘Cause he is loaded with cash.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Hmm.</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' Hence why his last name is Cash.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' I see. Well, anyway, uh, if that’s what you want, uh, I can’t, uh, force you or anyth—or anything else. So, uh--</font><br /> <br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:''' But, Chris, you should be careful [''Chris overlapping, indistinct'']. But you should be careful, Chris, on, like, all the women that you encounter, you better make sure that you treat them properly, do not touch them on the first date; don’t try to fucking kiss them, and, you know, you’ll have no problems, but if you do, you know, the pickle men will come and take them away, and take them to Clyde, and he is gonna take care of them for the rest of their lives as well.</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' I see. All right. Okay. All right, well, you—you take care of yourself.</font><br /> <br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:''' Hey why don't you take care of yourself too, Chris, okay?</font><br /> <br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:''' Uh, yeah. Okay. Bye-bye.</font><br /> <br /> ''For the second part of this audio which is unrelated to Emily, see [[Hooker_incident|The Hooker Incident]].''<br /> <br /> ==Hindsight==<br /> Chris no longer considers this a date. When speaking with others about it, he claims it was nothing more than meeting a fan, and even less of a date because he got trolled.<br /> <br /> ==External links==<br /> * [http://www.mediafire.com/?jmmyzlznhfa Post-date conversations]<br /> <br /> {{Sweethearts}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Sweethearts]]<br /> [[Category:Trolls]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Jackie_Chat_3&diff=125448 Jackie Chat 3 2010-11-18T03:37:29Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div>This chat took place on 30 [[September 2010]]. Highlights of the chat include [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] discussing ([[List of Chris's lies|or lying about]]) applying at McDonald’s. Jackie also asks how Chris got onto [[Monthly tugboat|Social Security]] despite him appearing to be fully capable of working; Chris believes that [[Bob Chandler|his father]] possibly committed fraud to get him on SSI, but also says that his father thinks he cannot possibly live on his own.<br /> <br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:40 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> CWC (ChrisChanSonichu) is available 7:40 pm<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:40 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> <3<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:41 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Hey, [[Jackie]]. :) h<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:40 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> hello ~ ~ ~<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:41 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> How was your day?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:41 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> long and [[stress]]ful<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:41 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> lots of homework :-(<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:42 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> classes were hard?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:41 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> yeah, they're getting ther<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:41 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> there<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:42 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Hang in there; you'll pull through greatly. ;) h<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:42 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I've had an okay day.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:42 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I've applied online for a cashier job at the new [[McDonald's|McD]] today; the [[manager]] called me a couple of hours to schedule an interview tomorrow. :D h<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:43 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> &#58;-D :-D :-D<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:43 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> thats great!<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:44 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I've got the resume put together; I only need to retype the "[[Job]] Objectives", and I will wear a green shirt for the interview.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:44 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> hey, could i see a copy of your interview? i'm curious<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:45 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I've heard on John Tesh's Radio show that when going to a job interview, wear green, because when the boss sees green, he/she thinks good [[money]].<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:45 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> or something like that anyway.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:46 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> copy of your resume i mean, not interview<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:46 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> do you mean a copy of my resume?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:46 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> yeah<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:46 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> typo :-)<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:46 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I'll e-mail it to you later after I retype the J.O. part.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:46 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> ok!<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:47 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I just checked my e-mail; some [[troll]] pretened to be Lars "Luxor"; what a kook! LOL<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:47 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> speaking of Lars, guess what I got in the mail today?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:47 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> [[Julie|Like]] [[Ivy|as]] [[Vanessa Hudgens|if]] [[Jimmy Hill|I]] [[Clyde Cash|would]] [[Emily|fall]] [[PandaHalo|for]] [[Liquid Chris|a]] [[Blanca|Troll's]] [[Surfshack Tito|Ploy]].<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:47 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> a letter from him?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:48 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> a toy boat made out of popsickle sticks<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:48 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> close enough.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:48 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> with a condom for the sail<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:48 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> fresh or used?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:48 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> fresh. but it was one of those lubricated kinds, so it feels all oily<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:49 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yep. either way, I'd say dang.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:49 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> its a magnum too<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:49 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> wanted to remind me that he's black<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:49 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I use Trojan.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:49 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> I wasnt impressed by his little gift.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:49 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I would not be either. did it come with a letter?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:50 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> yeah.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:50 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> what was the subject of the letter?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:50 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> he said a bunch of stuff.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:50 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> mostly<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:51 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Like a "Come back to me, baby?", "I'm soo sorry for being selfish" or something like that?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:51 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> he said he hoped i was feeling better after the recent video i had you made<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:51 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> ???<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:51 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and that he still has lingering regrets from the violence i made you show<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:51 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i wrote back to tell him once again that i hated him<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:51 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> That violence was voluntary; you did not make me do it.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:51 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and that my message should be clear<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:52 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Hells yeah, [[Sweetheart]]! :D h<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i also told him not to do that again, ever. I wasn't impressed with his little boat. I threw it away<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:52 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Good for you.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> magnum sail and all<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> as big as his dick was, it wasn't worth it<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> his problem was always his ego<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> he's so full of himself that no matter how clearly i tell him its over, he still thinks he can just wear me down and get me to come back to him<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:53 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I hear that; too [[Obesity|big for the britches]] he was tryin' to front.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:54 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> hey, could you make one more video and direct it at him?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:54 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I hear you; like in this episode of "Stacked" where Pamela was in the same situation... it was the one where she was trying to get her grandmother's watch back I'm thinking of, but there was also a similar story in the Pilot.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:54 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Yes.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:55 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i'd like you to tell him once again that he wasted all his money on stupid boats and that i left him because he would never take me out because of it<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:55 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> tell him that i got fed up with all the boats all over the goddamned apartment, half of them not even taken out of their package because he just bought them for the sake of buying them<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:56 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I'll shout it out directly to him that you are soo over him. And I'll put more pain into it; I'll hump a bit, telling that I'll be doing that with you from now on. YEAH!!!<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:56 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and this time, you don't have to try to be civil. be smug, laugh in his face, anything like that. you tried to be civil last time and he just ignored you. all he understands is bluntness<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:56 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> And yes I will tell him about how he valued boats over you.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:56 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> yes!!! thats perfect!!<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:56 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> do all of that<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:56 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Oh, Yeah!<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:57 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> oh, and maybe you should show his picture up close in the video. i think he wouldnt expect you to do that, he probably thought only you would see it when he showed it<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:57 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> he'll be really surprised if you show it publically<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:57 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Good idea.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:57 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> like, show the picture, and then maybe draw a stupid mustache on it or something, and then rip it in half<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:57 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Perhaps the Trolls will dub him the New "[[Black]] [[Man in the Pickle Suit]]".<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:58 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> lol<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:58 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> he was always more of a gourd man<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:58 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Or, I can make a cut-out pickle suit to put over everything but his face, THEN tear it all to pieces.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:58 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> ooh, that would be nice!<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:58 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> gourd... that's like a Squash, right?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:58 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> yeah<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[7:59 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I thought so.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:59 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> give him a pickle suit or a squash suit<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:59 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> whichever strikes your fancy.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[7:59 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> CWC (ChrisChanSonichu) is idle 7:59 pm<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:00 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> How about a pickle suit and a squash hat; in a pickle suit, it will really make two birds with one stone, because that will be a strike against the trolls too.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:00 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> &#42;and a squash hga<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:00 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> &#42;hat<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:00 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i kind of like the idea of a squash suit. and call him the "man in the squash suit" too. the trolls will know its about them too because pickles and squash are related<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:01 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I think I can work with that.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:01 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> &#58;-)<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:01 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> cool.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:01 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> ugh<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:01 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> those damn boats<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:01 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yeah.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:01 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> would you believe he bought paint and accessory kits for boats he didn't even own?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:02 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I hear that.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:02 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Actually, I can relate.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:02 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> oh?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:02 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> CWC (ChrisChanSonichu) is available 8:02 pm<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:03 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> On the [[PSN|PlayStation Store]], I checked-out a bunch of FREE Add-Ons for [[games]] I don't have the games for, so they're just sitting there in my queue, very likely NOT to be downloaded.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:03 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> ah, i thought you were going to mention your [[dad]]<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:03 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> At least I did not have to pay for any of those.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:03 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Yes, him too with his model planes, and he sometimes heavily splurges on himself with something expensive, like a new used car for himself, like his Honda, an HDTV, and a few other things.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:03 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> But he did get good deals on those when he bought them.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:05 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well, you should mention that sort of thing in the video<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:05 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Still, spends more on himself then than he does for [[mom]].<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:05 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I'd rather not.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:05 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> no?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:06 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I already am on his bad side with how much I've already revealed on the [[internet]], between nude photos and videos of myself, and Especially the videos touring the [[house]].<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:06 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Greene County could kick us out of the house for heavy fire hazards with all that junk my family hoarded.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:06 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> What I have out of all that is a pale comparison; boxes of toys. They pale in comparison to Heavy, Bulky Furniture, like a couch my mother insists she'll place and use, but she will not.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:08 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I'd like to just store all of that stuff in a shed, or have it all donated to Goodwill, but I can't because my mother would throw fits against me and then some. Maybe even buy all that stuff back.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:08 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> And I have suggested before Storing it all, but neither parent will go for that.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:09 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> aww, poor baby... :-(<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:10 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Yeah. It makes ONLY a few rooms of the house accessible.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:10 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well, you could always get your own place<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:11 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I estimate... about half of the total rooms have space to even walk through, and my [[room]] is the roomiest in comparison.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:11 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Not yet; lack of funds for one thing, and I have a lot of ties to this house and my family. The only way I would be able to move out is A) when I can actually afford to or B) hang out at my [[girlfriend]]'s place.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:11 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Are your parents similar to mine in that characteristic?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:12 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> no, mine are fairly clean<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:13 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> You are lucky, plus I'm certain they're a lot younger than mine.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:13 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> they're in their 50's, yeah<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:13 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Robert and Barbara; 83 and (about to turn on Friday) 69 respectively.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:13 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well, once you get the job at mcdonalds, you'll be rolling in cash<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:13 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> ooh, wish her happy [[birthday]]!<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:13 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> for me<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:14 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Yes, I'll be able to better pay my family back more quickly, plus have more pocket money for myself.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:14 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I think I've told you about me being able to make 980 a month and keep my SSI; we've had a discussion about that, I think.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:14 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> yeah, i rememeber that<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:15 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> A slight exageration.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:15 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> For every Two Dollars I make OVER the 980 limit, they take away ONE Dollar from my SSI.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:15 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and as you get settled into a job, you can get yourself off the welfare and supporting yourself entirely!<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:15 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> IF I was making 1000 a month, they'd take away <br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:15 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> come to think of it, it's not as bad as I had thought before.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:16 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well, once you get a full-time job you wont need the SSI anymore anyway, right?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:17 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Maybe, if I was making like 2600-3000 a month, in which case THAT would completely wipe out my SSI.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:18 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i dont mean if your job pays so much that it puts your SSI at zero.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:18 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i meant that if you get a full-time job, you wont have a reason to be on SSI in the first place, right?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:19 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Firstly, my family worked really hard to get me on it in the first place nearly a decade ago; once I say NO and get rid of it, I may never have that safety net ever again. Plus, at even 1000 a month from the job, add 800 to that, and that still makes a good 1800 a month.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:20 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> chris, no one else gets that sort of safety net.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:20 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> if you have a full-time job why would you need it<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:20 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> SSI is meant for people who are unable to work. but that isnt true in your case.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:22 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Well, on one hand, you are right, I would not require the SSI upon having a job... (hang on I have more, which is what I mean by "...")<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:22 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> but on the other hand, having that option is a Rarity, and it is a major blessing to me to even have it.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:23 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> sounds more like fraud than a blessing, but if thats how you look at it...<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:23 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> wait, here, i'm reading the SSI application form:<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:23 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> it says<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:23 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> "For the state agency to decide that you are disabled, your medical condition must significantly limit your ability to do basic work activities—such as walking, sitting and remembering—for at least one year. "<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:23 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Plus the job market is fickle; there is a chance I may get fired even by a technicality.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:24 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> you are able to walk, sit, and remember well enough. you can do other more complex things too<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:24 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I'm sure my father had read that rule as well, but he found a loophole.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:24 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> so he committed fraud?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:24 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I think.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:24 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I do not know, but I do not think it would be called a fraud.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:24 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> If it was a fraud, then it would have stopped years ago.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:25 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well, if he lied, thats fraud<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:25 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> sometimes they dont catch it.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:25 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> the rule says you have to be incapable of basic tasks. you are not incapable of basic tasks. therefore you should be working<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:26 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> besides, you always say you want to be taken seriously and accepted as an equal because of your high functioning [[autism]], but nobody else who is equal to normal people needs SSI<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:26 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I feel uncertain on how to address those details, and I am not ignoring the issue. I will talk with my father about it, and I will have a better answer for it then.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:27 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i know low-functioning autistics who take tickets at the movie theaters or things like that, they hold down jobs<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:27 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> sweetie, are you actually low-functioning? you can tell me, i wont judge<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:28 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I was classified "High-Functioning"; that's all I know. Yet sometimes it does take me a while to fully think the details.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:28 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> thats all you know? i would think you would be more curious to know your own medical and legal status<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:28 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> And I am still classified as high-functioning from a more current test just a few years ago.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:28 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well, then, you dont need your SSI<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:28 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> so once you get a full-time job, you can get off of it! :-)<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:28 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> you mentioned earlier that sometimes people lose their jobs for dumb reasons, and its true that that happens<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:28 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> but thats what unemployment is for. it holds you over til you get a new job<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:30 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I do not know all of the details, and processing all of this is making me feel uncomfortable. I would appreciate it if I can have time later to think further and process all of this to feel better able to accept and address it.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:30 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well, its ok if you need time to think up answers.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:30 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> ooh i know!!<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:30 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> your first video for the October contest can be your answer!<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:30 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> you could take a few minutes and explain why you think you need/deserve your SSI<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:32 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I don't feel I can come up with an answer that quick, plus again, I do not want to reveal too much more information to the Trolls, and that IS a Private Detail.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:32 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well i've asked you about this before though, months ago<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:32 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> you havent thought anything new up in all that time?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:33 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and im not asking you to reveal sensitive data. the trolls already know you're on SSI, you could just explain why you feel you deserve it<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:33 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Well, I do have a new detail I will confide in you.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:33 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> oh?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:33 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I have talked to my father a bit about it...<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:33 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> And he has informed me that he feels not confident in my own Social abilities outside the house.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:33 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Plus, again, the information I've revealed on the internet before were of NO help towards his feelings about me.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:33 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> either<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:34 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well i'll quote again for emphasis:<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:34 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> " For the state agency to decide that you are disabled, your medical condition must significantly limit your ability to do basic work activities—such as walking, sitting and remembering—for at least one year. "<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:35 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> the state has determined that is the cutoff point for a person to receive SSI<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:35 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Socializing is a basic work activity, and Autism is a Social Anxiety.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:35 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> you socialize with me well enough<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:35 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> if you can go into mcdonalds and order without causing problems, how is it any harder to be on the other side of the counter?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:36 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Yes, with few people, like you, after getting to know you better, and that you made the first contact with me with a pure friendly gesture, I felt comfortable talking with you.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:37 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> let me think about that a moment...<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:37 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well when you're working a job, people will be coming up to you all the time to start conversations<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:38 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> When I order, generally, I'm not making eye-contact, I know or am thinking of what I want to order, I order it; little conversation is made...<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:38 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> but you can do more basic things like walk, sit, and remember<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:38 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and not all jobs require you to talk to customers anyway. get a job that doesnt make you<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:39 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> On Taking someone's order, I Listen very well, I take it down accurately, I take the money, I give the correct change, I give the food to the correct customer; I don't have to make much conversation.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:39 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> you could be one of those heavyweights that stocks shelves or something<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:39 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> so you know that you can work.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:39 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> No, I need to practice being social, especially at work.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:39 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well you cant practice without having a job in the first place<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:40 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I feel I can work and stand for hours.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:40 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Exactly.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:40 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> there you go!<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:40 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> problem seolved<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:40 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> &#42;solved i mean<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:40 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yeah.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:40 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> so you're looking forward to your interview tomorrow?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:40 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yes I am.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:40 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> I'm sure your mom and dad are rooting for you too<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:41 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Regardless of comfort, I will make constant eye-contact with my interviewer and be polite. I've done this before in past interviews as well.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:41 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Concentrated (forced) self-control.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:41 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I think I'll do well in the interview.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:42 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> is your mom or dad driving you, since your car is in the shop?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:42 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yes, my father will be driving me.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:42 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well good luck! :-)<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:43 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Thank you. :) h<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:43 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Let's talk about your ideas for my TrollBuster Pilot comic to wrap this up.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:44 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> ok<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:44 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> have you drawn any pages yet? looked like you had the plot pretty cemented<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:44 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> done any storyboarding?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:45 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I have not drawn any pages yet, and the storyboarding is in my head; still I have the save game photos of the Truck, Cal and Dee Dee.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:46 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> oh, so you havent done anything yet<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:46 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I just need more ideas for specific topics. not yet.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:47 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> maybe you can use some of the unused [[sonichu]] plots you have saved up<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:47 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i know you had tons of plotlines, years worth, you had been planning to use right?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:47 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> now that you've decided to end sonichu, you can still use some of those plotlines<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:48 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I have not ended Sonichu; I only lost inspiration to draw, thanks to the people online.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:48 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> so you just decided to not pay attention to it anymore?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:48 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> or are you going to have both comics going at once? that'll be tough<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:49 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Right now, I'm concentrating on this one Pilot Comic for the TrollBusters.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:49 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> It's going to be a P.A. book as well.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:49 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> here's an idea for a plotline:<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:50 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> how about your trollbusters get a call from a victim<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:50 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> the victim was called to go on a first date with a girl at burger king<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:51 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> okay<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:51 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> but when he got there, turned out it was a plot<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:51 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> ooh. and then what?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> it was trolls who wanted to steal his pendant, which was a family heirloom handed down for generations<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and so the trollbusters have to go hunt down the thieves and get it back<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and at the end they find out that the trolls they beat were just flunkies of more powerful trolls that they would face in the future.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:52 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i figure its kind of something you could relate to because trolls tried to get your [[medallion]], so your feelings could go into it easier<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:55 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> that is good, and yes. But I'm not sure about the pendant being the stolen item; I feel it is TOO Close to home, and it does sound trite. But it can be an actual item, perhaps a Golden Pocket Watch.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:55 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> yeah, a golden pocket watch would work fine too<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:56 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> very good. :) h<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:56 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> next question is Where the Trolls are?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:56 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> uh...<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:57 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> should they be in the US, or should they be in another country?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:57 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> make up a country for them<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:57 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> "Trollvania"<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:57 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> LOL<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:57 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yeah<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:58 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Another country is good, then they can show off their Sponsored Private Plane they fly in to take their truck with them.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:58 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> sponsored by whom?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:58 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> which corporation<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:59 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I'd say Jet, but a Private Jet is more lightweight, IMHO. Sponsored by me and the city of [[Cwcville]].<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[8:59 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Cal and Dee^2's home base is in Cwcville.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:59 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> where does CWCville get such funding from?<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[8:59 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> costs a lot to run a jet<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:00 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yes, but they don't use it that often; a lot of the trolls are found in the USA.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:00 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> CWC (ChrisChanSonichu) is idle 9:00 pm<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:00 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> what is the tax rate in CWCville? what is sales tax set at<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:01 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> no more than anywhere else.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:01 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> its different everywhere, though<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:01 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> what are CWCville's primary industries?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:02 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> That type of detail does not compute with me. I'm not sure...<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:02 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I'd say something like New York's Prime Industries.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:02 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Cwcville is a Metropolis with Suburbs.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:02 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> so does CWCville have a lot of jews and immigrants, like new york?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:03 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yes.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:03 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> is CWCville on the Dow, the NASDAQ, or the SNP500?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:03 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> ???<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:03 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> you know, the stock exchange<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:03 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> with all those jews that's going to be an important factor<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:04 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Why not? there are a LOT of [[Twin Falling Towers|big buildings]] there.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:04 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> i see<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:04 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> well, i have to go soon, but i look forward to seeing that new Lars video tomorrow!<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:05 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> Okay, Sweetheart.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:05 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I enjoyed talking with you some more.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:05 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> One more question...<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:05 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> and i'd love to see the SSI video on friday<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:05 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> yes?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:05 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> can you describe to me what your voice sounds like?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:05 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> or can you name a celebrity who you feel you sound most like?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:05 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> or sounds like you<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:06 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> kind of unique i think, i sound like myself<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:06 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> alright, well will you be available to talk tomorrow night?<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:07 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> yes I'll be available tomorrow night.<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:06 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> great! lets plan on it!!<br/><br /> <font color="#CC3299">[9:06 pm] '''Jacklyn Romy:'''</font><br /> okay, gotta go. goodnight sweetie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:07 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> okay.<br/><br /> <font color="#0033FF">[9:07 pm] '''CWC:'''</font><br /> I Love You. :-* h<br/><br /> <br /> {{-}}<br /> {{FanChats}}<br /> [[Category:Chatlogs]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=A_Workout&diff=124844 A Workout 2010-11-14T03:20:05Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div>'''A Workout''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 19 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris appears to have stuffed his [[muscle bra]] again and performs [[Chris_and_health#Exercise|a workout routine]] to "Ass 'N' Titties" by [[Wikipedia:DJ Assault|DJ Assault]], specifically a [[YouTube]] video which includes dancing by various ''World of Warcraft'' characters. Most would assume this is yet another attempt for Chris to prove that he is not obese and is actually very athletic, but he just comes off looking like a goof.<br /> <br /> ==Video==<br /> {{Infobox/video<br /> | name = A Workout<br /> | video = {{#ev:youtube|_2PMKRwgAEw}}<br /> | stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]<br /> | subject = {{Power|text}}<br /> | style = {{Crazy|text}}<br /> | saga = <br /> | shirt = VA Red Cross Blood Donor, {{Cwcbra|text}}<br /> | previous = [[Pregnant Act#The Remake|Pregnant Act]]<br /> | next = [[SonichuBabies]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> === Transcript ===<br /> '''''0:00-0:10''' Video starts with Chris putting on Ass 'n' Titties by DJ Assault. Chris faces the camera with his stuffed [[muscle bra]] and starts [[Fail|exercising]] by punching spastically in time to the beats. ''<br /> <br /> '''''0:11-0:24''' He then begins doing his version of jumping jacks.''<br /> <br /> '''''0:25-0:59''' Chris starts swaying his hips from side to side before doing several [[CWC Fighter|Chun Li kicks]]. He noticeably begins to slow down here but continues on and adds spastic punches as well.'' <br /> <br /> '''''1:00-1:27''' He starts twisting side to side with stuffed muscle bra in full view. [[Slow in the minds|Chris loses the beat]] of the track at this point.'' <br /> <br /> '''''1:28-1:54''' Next up he starts stretching his arms to the ground and back up. Though he speeds up again for a few seconds, he goes back to slow relatively quickly.'' <br /> <br /> '''''1:55-2:11''' Chris starts stretching his arms down each arm individually.'' <br /> <br /> '''''2:12-2:19''' Here he stretches out his back with his [[Obesity|fat autistic gut]] on display.'' <br /> <br /> '''''2:20-2:43''' Next he begins twisting side to side again momentarily before doing jumping jacks again with poor posture.'' <br /> <br /> '''''2:44-3:05''' Begins punching again, taking a brief look at his screen. Starts punching side to side.'' <br /> <br /> '''''3:06-3:23''' Chris twists side to side again, this time with his arms open and being twice as slow as the rhythm.''<br /> <br /> '''''3:24-3:29''' Punches upwards and then back forwards. Music stops. Chris faces the camera and gropes his own man tits.''<br /> <br /> Feel her boobies!<br /> <br /> ==Fan videos==<br /> <br /> {{Infobox/Fanvideo<br /> | name = 12 Second Power Workout With Christian Weston Chandler<br /> | video = {{#ev:youtube|EJNtY52H2Oc}}<br /> | maker = ChristopherCooler<br /> | stardate = 19 [[October 2010]]<br /> | type = <br /> }}<br /> <br /> ==See also==<br /> *[[CWC Fighter]]<br /> *[[11042009 51 50‎|51 50]]<br /> *[[30 Push-Ups]]<br /> *[[Power]]<br /> *[[I AM STRONG]]<br /> <br /> ==External links==<br /> *[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJ5-iZYHBEc The video in the background]<br /> {{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Pregnant Act#The Remake|Pregnant Act]]|nextlink=[[SonichuBabies]]}}<br /> {{Videos}}<br /> [[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_and_hypocrisy&diff=124556 Chris and hypocrisy 2010-11-11T21:18:55Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div><center>{{#ev:youtube|IJoF_eA_lX8}}</center><br /> {{quote|I am a man who stands strong and true and by the main woman in his life.|[[Chris]], on remaining faithful to [[Ivy]]<ref name="Vanessa IRC Chat 2">[[Vanessa IRC Chat 2]]</ref>}}<br /> {{quote|I love you.|Chris to [[Vanessa Hudgens]], 35 minutes later<ref name="Vanessa IRC Chat 2"/>}}<br /> <br /> [[Image:Z100 0533.jpg|thumb|Above: Chris breaks almost thirty years of proud sobriety due to the influence of ''[[The Simpsons]]'']]<br /> <br /> '''Hypocrisy''' is the act of claiming to have beliefs, opinions, virtues, feelings, qualities, or standards that one does not actually have. Hypocrisy is thus a kind of lie. Hypocrisy may come from a desire to hide from others actual motives or feelings.<br /> <br /> [[Chris]] is an accomplished hypocrite, holding others to standards to which he himself does not live up. This is possibly due to the fact that he's incapable of serious introspection and serious self-examination due to his [[autism]]. Chris believes that he is a blameless, [[Godjesus|holy]] creature that is [[Mary Poppins|practically perfect in every way]]. However, he sees plenty of flaws in the world around him that cause him [[stress]]. He blames all of his problems on external factors like [[trolls]], [[homos]], or the [[JERKS|entire male sex.]] In the past he's faulted [[Manajerks|store managers]] and [[Jerkops|mall security guards]] for complications during his [[Love Quest]], although that's less relevant nowadays as he rarely leaves the house except for trips to [[McDonald's]]. And when he can't fault other people for his problems, Chris relies on autism and stress as fallback excuses.<br /> <br /> He's strongly opinionated and drunk on his e-fame, so he sees himself as a [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|role model]] that could change the world. He doesn't necessarily want to change it for the better, but he wants to change it to where everyone conforms to his worldview and showers him with praise so he will never again have to [[Tobacky|feel uncomfortable]], suffer any inconveniences, or be forced to actually put effort into anything. This means arrogantly pointing out the sins of others but never answering to his own, which leads to Chris doling out advice to others that he should be heeding himself. <br /> <br /> Chris's [[Mailbag]] answers are particularly rich sources of hypocrisy, where he readily gives advice to people that he himself will never follow.<br /> <br /> ==Examples==<br /> <br /> === "Grow up!" — Maturity ===<br /> <br /> In the latter half of [[2009]], Chris had become fond of telling his [[trolls]] and detractors to "grow up." This is coming from a twenty-eight-year-old man who has lived with his parents continually since graduating [[high school]], [[Chris's resume|has only been employed]] for two months of his entire life, lives in a room full of [[toys]], plays [[video games]] all day, refers to things that make him feel uncomfortable with [[CWC-isms|childish euphemisms]], [[Chris and fashion|dresses like a toddler]], and is overly dependent on his parents (and the [[Monthly tugboat|U.S. government]]) to the point of absurdity.<br /> <br /> Chris has not moved on past high school. In his late twenties, he still wears his [[high school ring]], uses his old high school colors in [[art]] projects (and when he wants to portray Native Americans), and keeps his high school yearbooks within easy reach (so he can [[Mass debating|masturbate]] to [[Kellie Andes]] without leaving his chair). Chris's characters are examples of this as well. Despite ostensibly being 18–22 years old, the Sonichus sometimes don [[:Image:MegagiDecay.jpg|cheerleading outfits]] outside of sexual roleplay. Sonichu and Rosechu were originally 16 and 15 in the comics, respectively, before Chris retconned their ages so they can legally fuck. Then he created a [[Zapina|fourteen-year-old]] character who attends high school in a scandalously revealing outfit. Aged 27, Chris dispensed [[CWC Blog|dating advice]] to high school freshmen. A master of subtlety, Chris named one of the villains in his comics "[[Count Graduon]]".<br /> <br /> There is also a chance that Chris, just as it is the case with the word "[[naïve]]", have been called out on his stupid bullshit numerous times with the command "grow up", and as a result views the phrase as a very harsh insult meant to be used on your enemies. <br /> <br /> In short, Chris idealizes his youth while demonizing the present, as high school was a simpler time when he had a [[Gal-pals|social circle]], [[Biological clock|regular sleep patterns]], and some purpose in life apart from playing video games and debasing himself on the Internet.<br /> <br /> === "GET A JOB, DUDE" — Work ===<br /> [[Image:TwofacedCWC.jpg|thumb|"No, I am not being two-faced. I have been one-f-, I have been the one-faced this whole conversation."]]<br /> <br /> Chris also likes to tell people to get jobs while he himself has been employed for about two months of his life. On his résumé, Chris lists playing [[Pokémon]] cards with small children as volunteer work, when in reality emotionally-stunted manchildren playing Pokémon with little kids can be hardly considered as voluntary service. Chris [[Father Call|sometimes claims]] he was supervising or babysitting the children involved, where in reality Chris himself required some amount of supervision not to fuck up the [[The Game Place|hobby store]] where he played cards.<br /> <br /> Much like how acclaimed author [[Wikipedia:J. K. Rowling|J. K. Rowling]] went on benefits for a year or two so she'd have the time to write the first ''[[Harry Potter]]'' book (a franchise which went on to make her one of the richest women in the world), Chris avoids searching for employment to focus on merchandising [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] (a franchise which, as you know, will never make him [[Chris and Copyright|a penny]]). And that takes an hour or two at most: Chris will draw and color a comic page or two, make videos, or astonish [[Charlottesville]] residents with his [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkay]] skills in a bizarre marketing stunt. The rest of Chris's time is apparently spent playing [[List of Chris's games|video games]], [[Adult Swim|watching TV]], and [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads|downloading]] extra content for his video games. Chris has an abundance of free time where he could easily work a full-time job and still find the time to draw ''Sonichu''. That is, if Chris were employable. In reality Chris would [[Donald Duck impersonation|impersonate Donald Duck]] and it would be [[Wendy's]] all over again.<br /> <br /> In addition to this, Chris fails at having some basic skills one would need to keep employment, such as: keeping his [[Death threats|murderous rage]] in check, maintaining [[Chris and health#Hygiene|basic hygiene]], [[Chris and fashion|dressing appropriately]], showing tolerance and respect for [[Chris and Race|other people]], and [[Megan|keeping one's hands off]] women.<br /> <br /> === "WINDOWS TO HELL" — Other people with mental disabilities ===<br /> <br /> While happily claiming disability when it suits him (i.e. when he gets money and/or sympathy from it), Chris gladly reminds everyone that he's (high-functioning) [[autistic]]. However, Chris distances himself from others with autism, calling them "[[slow-in-the-minds]]" and "windows to hell." Chris specifically excluded "the low functionally mentally handicapped," "the [[Chris and health|seriously physically deformed]]," and the "Autistic, high-functionally or otherwise" from an actual list of criteria women would have to meet before he would consider dating them. For the record, "[[Niggos|blacks]]" are also disqualified. By his own admission, Chris is "sometimes retarded"<ref>[[Mumble 9.5]]</ref> and is abnormally proud that he is on the autism spectrum. In fact, right below his rigorous standards for his future girlfriend, he admits that he himself is autistic but claims "[[ego|that's another story]]."<br /> <br /> Chris denies that any of his Sonichu characters are autistic. Yet they're all copyright-infringing little Mary Sues, need to be in the [[Dating Education|special classes]] Chris thought up and every so often display debilitating social anxiety around the opposite sex. Back when Chris made his own Pokémon cards, he thought up an "autistic Pokémon" named Plautistic (who could disable its own attacks), but this only appears on the cover of ''[[Christian's Favorite Hits!]]'' and nowhere else.<br /> <br /> In the mailbags, Chris dismisses any similarity between autism and [[Asperger's syndrome]], another disorder on the autism spectrum. Chris went so far as to create a specific section for autism-related emails, and then a [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|frothing rant on CWCipedia]] where he rails against those with Asperger's syndrome. The abridged version of Chris's reasoning is that by having a higher-functioning form of autism than Chris, they're diminishing Chris's own accomplishments. Chris considers [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|everything he's done so far]] special because he has autism. To date, the only things Chris has actually accomplished are graduating from high school and a [[PVCC|third-rate community college]], which most people could do with little effort.<br /> <br /> Despite likening the mentally handicapped to reanimated walking corpses, Chris bases a large part of his identity around having autism, whether he's triumphing over it by being able to mow a lawn or he's using it as an excuse to sit around and play ''[[Little Big Planet]]'' all day. Incidentally, this behavior is actually somewhat common with teenage girls with bipolar disorder (real, self-diagnosed or imagined), where they'll brag about how terribly bad their bipolar disorder is, how much lithium they're on, and so forth. Most grow out of it by the time they're eighteen.<br /> <br /> ==="I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance ===<br /> <br /> It's very much in Chris's interests that others tolerate him and his odd behavior. Chris's life is defined by mannerisms that can charitably be described as unorthodox. His autism certainly shapes some of his lesser quirks, but he's also picked up some very strange ideas. He thinks it's normal for adults to [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shit their pants]], and he found nothing strange about jerking off into a [[fapcup|cup]] and [[recycling|chugging it down]]. He once uploaded a [[YouTube]] video where he [[The Return of Kimmi|made out with a sex doll]] with a picture of his sweetheart taped to its face because he thought it was an endearing act that his sweetheart would want to see. He had a store clerk [[Sports bra photo series|fit him for a bra]] that he wears happily. He uses his [[Sonichu (comic)|children's comic]] to express and explore his [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|sexual fantasies and desires]], and to mete out [[Sub-Episodes|harsh]], sometimes [[Sonichu 10#Forgiveness...?|lethal punishment]] on his perceived antagonists. And he's [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_28th%2C_2009#Watch|made statements]] to indicate he's [[Chris and Remorse|not ashamed]] of these actions, regardless of what anyone says.<br /> <br /> So in order to continue to do whatever he wants to do and not be made fun of, he explains these things away by essentially saying, "everyone does it and you should still consider me normal," even though he'd probably be hard-pressed to name another guy his age that shits himself as much as he does. Deep down, he probably knows some of these things are fucked up, but finds living up to the standards of society to be a huge inconvenience. So he expects others to change their perceptions so that they can accept him and all of the things he doesn't want to change. In instances where someone might think he's a weirdo, Chris preaches tolerance and insists others open their minds to different ideas and not be so judgmental. <br /> <br /> However, this doesn't work both ways with Chris. Chris wants people to open their minds to his foibles, but once he's made up his mind that a group of people are doing things that he considers negative, suddenly tolerance goes out the window and he will refuse to show them even the slightest amount of respect and acceptance. <br /> <br /> An example of Chris not accepting others came about during the aforementioned war in his mind being waged against Asperger's syndrome. [[Mailbag 7|When a fan mail submission]] pointed out how stubborn it was to close his mind to documented facts about Asperger's syndrome, Chris refused any concessions, though in the very next letter he berated someone for following what he called a closed-minded religion and said he'd pray for her to open her [[china|mind]].<br /> <br /> In another example, Chris is sickened by the idea of [[homos]]exuality and [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_5th%2C_2009#Take_2|can't even bring himself to say the word "gay,"]] though he will say the word "homo" if he's using it as an insult. He's gone on record as saying he [[CWC Update 30 January 2009|hates gay people]], [[Megan_E-mails#Chris_is_angry_about_Megan_kissing_her_friend.2C_then_pities_himself|is afraid of them]], and would outlaw them if he had the power to do so. Chris has [[Mailbag_1#The_cure_for_homosexuality|envisioned a future where scientists have created a cure for being gay]], and has incorporated this idea into [[Sonichu 10|issue ten]] of his kiddie comic strip. This immense hatred burns deep within him despite the fact that only one gay person (his [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|elementary school]] principal)<ref name="Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8">[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]]</ref> had done anything negative to him in his entire life, until [[Jack Thaddeus]] began to interact with Chris. Though in contrast (as far as Chris is aware) Jack was also the person providing Chris with free hosting for the [[CWCipedia]], which at least makes up for some degree of harassment he has given Chris. It was only later that he'd been led to believe that [[Clyde Cash]] was gay as well. He'd stated to [[Megan]] that he had these feelings about gays even before he met her gay friend Christopher (whom he illogically suspected of trying to sleep with Megan). He simply hates them because they exist, and has refused to tolerate them all his life. Despite his past fervor, he has recently stated that he "(does) and will NOT Discriminated homosexuals as Individual People" and that "What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it."<ref>[[Common Questions#1 January 2010]]</ref> Which is why he employs an [[Magi-Chan|omniscient being]] to [[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|spy on people and punish them]] for what they do behind closed doors. Which brings us to...<br /> <br /> === "I fear them all" — Homosexuality ===<br /> <br /> Chris is resolute in his beliefs that [[homos]] are an abomination before GodJesus. But he does make exceptions if the gay person has a [[china]]. During an [[IRC (02 January 2009)|IRC Chat]] he granted lesbians complete amnesty, saying that if he were in charge, it would be "illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe." When pressed on why it's okay for women to be gay and not men, he fell back on his "all men are [[JERKS]]" defense by saying, "it's bad enough they're mostly jerks, plus homo men are AGAINST God's will." However, later that month in a [[Mumble_1#Gays.2C_lesbians_and_men_in_general|Mumble chat]], he softened his stance on whether or not it's okay for women to be gay be saying he would "100% discourage" gay men, but for gay women, he will "partial courage." While Chris often quotes the Bible when explaining his hatred of homosexuals, when pressed about his own abominations he will go into a confusing rant about how God only wants people to be happy and not worry about a myriad of rules. In a stunning display of hypocrisy, Chris is quite adamant to others that he is not wrong in ignoring any Old Testament verses against pornography or masturbation, as the Old Testament is "more for Jewish people," but the one Old Testament passage regarding homosexuality that he heard on ''[[Family Guy]]'' is still valid.<br /> <br /> In the world of ''Sonichu'', the villainous [[Reldnahc]] is gay, but the [[Heather Iglesias|nanny for Sonichu and Rosechu's kids]] is also gay. She's on the side of good because she's a lesbian, though she's been instructed to keep her [[Silvana|trap]] shut about it. [[Mailbag 4#In which Chris is rude to a young girl|A fan letter]] confronted Chris with the hypocrisy of having lesbians in the comic despite his viewpoints and fine Christian morals. While Chris answered parts of the letter, he conveniently ignored that point. Likely, Chris makes this exception because it would be difficult for him to [[mass debating|fap]] to all the [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|lesbian porn]] he watches and not feel conflicted.<br /> <br /> He also will make exceptions if gays do voices in his [[LittleBigPlanet|favorite video games]]. A member of his [[Monty Python|favorite comedy troupe]] was gay, though it's not clear if Chris knows that. But it does seem clear that whether it's porn, TV or video games, as long as Chris is entertained by a gay person, Chris somehow exempts them from the abomination rule. <br /> <br /> His hatred towards gays and everything they stand for contrasts very sharply to some of his actions. Chris has no qualms with drinking his own semen, and has said he would even go as far as [[Kacey Phone Call|licking his semen off his beloved]]. He's admitted to being plagued by [[Mailbag 4|homoerotic thoughts]]. He loves [[rainbow]]s and has frequently put them in his comics. Chris liked the PS2 game ''[[Wikipedia:Katamari Damacy|Katamari Damacy]]'' enough to quote it in some of his videos, a game that features a character wearing a flamboyant ensemble that shows off his huge [[Pickle|schlong]] clearly visible through his tights. He once referred to himself as coming [[IRC (20 January 2009)|"out of his autistic closet."]] He loves gay anthems, such as "[[Chris's Big Night Out|I Love the Nightlife]]," and listens to music straight men generally avoid, such as the [[Wikipedia:Backstreet Boys|Backstreet Boys]]. He loves romantic comedy films and even owns a copy of the ''Sex and the City'' movie. <br /> <br /> '''Chris shoves [[Sex toys|things]] up his ass.'''<ref>[[Bluespike PSN Chat 3]]</ref> That should say enough about this matter.<br /> <br /> In short, many gay men don't act as gay as Chris does sometimes, but he still feels justified at leveling his disapproving scorn at them.<br /> <br /> === "And I emphasize fan fiction" — Chris's creations ===<br /> <br /> Chris is extremely protective over [[Sonichu]] and the whole [[Sonichu (comic)|media franchise]] he has created.<br /> <br /> If Chris had actually shown any originality, this wouldn't really be a problem: he'd have full rights to do whatever he wants with his own original creations. People would frown on, but begrudgingly stomach, the idea that a writer who used to write fanfiction would strike it big through original works and then tell people not to create any fan fiction based on ''their'' works — legally appropriate, but it would show that the author has forgotten their roots. As [[Chris and copyright|discussed elsewhere]], however, Chris doesn't have all rights to Sonichu, and hasn't quite graduated to the "original works" club. He makes fan fiction and then whines about fan fiction. Even when the media industry tries their darnedest to demonize copyright infringement as theft and everyone laughs at them as a result, let us just use an appropriate analogy here: ''thieves shouldn't whine when someone steals from them.''<br /> <br /> Fundamentally, Chris's creations are a bizarre maelstrom of various fan fiction elements, with various bits stolen from a [[Things Chris has Ripped Off|great number of sources]]. Chris seems to be honest about this, and says that he blatantly steals material from various shows.<ref>[[Common Questions#Answered 28 December 2009|Common Questions]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 35#In which Chris tells us that we need to go look up what he stole from]]</ref><br /> <br /> However, at the same time, he claims that Sonichu is an original creation of his, and has no problems attempting to dictate how people use this precious creation of his.<ref>[[Down With Asperchu]]</ref> In short, he calls other works "fan fiction" and fails to realize that ''Sonichu is fundamentally fan fiction, too'' &mdash; he is unable to see that the "fan" creations were created through the ''exact same process'' he himself used. He had the gall to say Sonichu is "[[parody|parodic]]," but doesn't like creations that he has labeled "parodies" either.<br /> <br /> Since ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' allows reusing certain content, Chris also took a number of competently made designs in ''LittleBigPlanet'' and used them in his own levels &mdash; [[Download For Play Only|only to tell people not to do the same with his levels]] when the policy was changed and all levels were made downloadable and editable offline.<br /> <br /> Oh, and just to top it off: he's crying over [http://www.zazzle.com/sonichu+gifts VERY REAL] unauthorized [[Jimmy Hill|Sonichu merchandise]], and profiting on (godawful) unauthorized [[eBay|Aqua Teen merchandise]].<br /> <br /> === "Get those cameras off me!" — Privacy ===<br /> <br /> In the Mailbags, Chris describes [[CWCville]] as a place where homosexuality is forbidden by law. This is enforced by [[Magi-chan]], who uses his psychic abilities to monitor all citizens at all times. Offenders are then rounded up and ''fined US$500'', money they could have otherwise spent on video games. <br /> <br /> Several days later, Chris would use the ''Sonichu'' comic to rail against celebrity news website [[Wikipedia:TMZ.com|TMZ.com]] for invading the privacy of his Electric Hedgehogs, who are apparently as interesting and noteworthy as actual celebrities. TMZ was depicted as a floating, all-seeing movie camera that spied on Rosechu putting in a tampon, Sonichu and Rosechu reenacting a bondage scene from ''[[Family Guy]]'', and [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Robbie Sonee]] describing unnatural acts with a (possibly anthropomorphic) lizard.<br /> <br /> Chris also stated during correspondence with his Wiki SysOp that he would go as far to [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The_Introduction_Image_Space_is_NOT_Ad_Space_(CCS)|distribute a video]] of himself having sex with a woman, recorded using hidden cameras, to prove his heterosexuality. When later pressed on this being a blatant invasion of privacy, Chris covered himself by stating that he would [[Mailbag 31#In_which_Chris_crosses_yet_another_line|blur the participating woman's face]], and upon further questioning changed his proposal to [[Mailbag 34#Chris_would_find_someone_okay_with_being_filmed_to_take_his_"virgin cherry branch"|involve a woman]] actually willing to participate.<br /> <br /> Although Chris originally lost his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shit]] when [[Lucas]] and [[Mimms]] released a candid photograph of him at [[The GAMe PLACe]] to the Internet, he had no qualms about walking into the same store (a privately owned establishment that he had been permanently banned from) and [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|surreptitiously recorded an audio conversation]] without the [[Michael Snyder|other party's]] consent or knowledge. Not only has the irony completely escaped Chris, but he is deliberately spreading the audio in an attempt to gain sympathy, believing that others will find him in the right despite his shady tactics. He later [[6 June 2010|tried to surreptitiously take a photograph of that same person]], but was stopped when he noticed Chris outside with a camera.<br /> <br /> === "They set me on fire!" — Slander ===<br /> [[Image:BurnedMySeat.jpg|thumb|left|Chris, March 2008: [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!|"I set my ASS ON FIRE!"]] Chris, January 2010: [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|"He sets me on fire!"]]]]<br /> <br /> It is evident to the readers of ''Sonichu'' that Chris uses the comic to settle his conflicts in real life. Every time he felt wronged by someone, he felt the unique urge to incorporate them in the comic and having his main hero (an idealized vision of himself) literally beating them up.<br /> <br /> The main victim of this treatment was [[Mary Lee Walsh]], the Dean of Student Affairs at the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. Because she "Dared" interrupting Chris in his [[Love Quest]] on the grounds of the college, Chris launched himself in a ridiculous one-sided feud against her and included her as the main villain in his comic. This is not an isolated incident. He gave the same treatment to literally anyone who had [[Stress|frustrated]] him. The list includes (but is not limited to) a [[Bagget|police officer]] called in to evict him from a [[Target]] store, various store [[Jerkop|security]] [[Jerkhief|guards]] and [[Manajerks|managers]], romantic [[Wes Iseli|rivals]], old [[CADD Chef|teachers]] and even [[Joseph Herring|fellow students]] only because they were popular with the girls.<br /> <br /> This wouldn't be a problem if the situation was contained in the comic itself. Anyone free to make an educated guess would say that Chris uses artistic license to overcompensate for his weaknesses in real life. This, however, disregards many [[Death threats]] he issued to individuals on the net. [[Jack Thaddeus]] and [[Clyde Cash]], two well-known antagonists of Chris, were berated (without success) into [[To Clyde and Jack|committing suicide]]. In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], they throw themselves down a 72-story elevator shaft. [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], the creator of the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page regarding Chris's antics, not only received [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|cryptic messages]] from Chris, but saw his own character [[Sonichu 8#The Clarksville Address|left for dead in a pool of his own blood]] after being battered by [[Rosechu]]'s [[Pickle|genitalia]]. The last example is quite disturbing. After a [[Liquid Chris#Showdown|long feud]] with the man known as [[Liquid Chris]], he saw no problem [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|yelling at him]], issuing [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!|death threats]], and trying to steal his [[Kacey|girlfriend]]. When this failed, he introduced the gentleman in the issue [[Sonichu Special 4]] of his comic, where he shot him in the shins after disarming him. When the girlfriend, scared for her and her boyfriend's safety, asked him what it was all about, he answered that it wasn't that bad [[Kacey and Liquid Call|since he barely shot him in the legs]].<br /> <br /> Unsurprisingly, Chris strongly disapproves of this method of expression when he's on the receiving end of it. When [[Down with Asperchu|he attacked]] Alec Benson Leary for the creation of [[Asperchu]], Alec had no scruples about putting him in front of the [http://asperchu.thecomicseries.com/comics/pl/23109 business end of a flamethrower]. This insulted Chris so much that he felt the need to make a [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|long video]] where he calls the attack made on him "horrendous" and vows that the [[Patti Chandler|spirit of his dead dog]] will avenge him. He would later cap off Sonichu 10 with a graphic depiction of Alec's execution, but not before mentioning the fiery incident one more time.<br /> <br /> In late [[May 2010]], Chris abandoned the [[CWCipedia]] after trolls overran it once again. In a message left behind, Chris claims that anything that doesn't come from his YouTube account, the former CWCipedia webpage or his [[OKCupid]] account is false and that anything shown elsewhere was made up just to slander ''him''. It's easy to see that Chris does not want others to see what kind of person he really is and thus claims that everything else that wasn't on something he created is false. Sadly, it doesn't work that way - just looking up his name in any of its forms brings up a lot of information about him, mostly the same things we already know about him. The Internet is a dangerous place and Chris doesn't know how dangerous it is.<br /> <br /> ==="A Sweetheart from the Ground Up" — Women===<br /> <br /> A big example of Chris's hypocrisy is the ridiculously high standards for a "[[sweetheart]]" that he's published at various times in his life, such as on the [[attraction sign]]. Some of the biggest offenders in regards to hypocrisy are:<br /> <br /> "Must Have a Mid to high salary." Chris does not have a job, has no prospects for a job, and lives on [[monthly tugboat|welfare checks]], yet any woman he dates must be gainfully employed, presumably so Chris can [[Chris and Money|spend]] her money on [[List of Chris's games|video games]] and [[sex toys]].<br /> <br /> "Must be average to slender body size." Chris is an [[obesity|obese]], lazy slob, yet demands that any potential sweetheart that he deigns to give his attention to be thin and cute. <br /> <br /> "Must not have [[autism]]." Despite the fact that Chris has made being autistic a huge point of pride, he absolutely refuses to consider any girl with the same condition on the grounds that he fears that seeing them will make him think about what he might be like if he had anything other than high-functioning autism.<br /> <br /> ==="I would have them ESS-acuted!" — Capital Punishment===<br /> <br /> Chris has made it known in his mailbag that he is [[Common Questions#30 January 2010|opposed to the death penalty]]. However, in [[9 February 2010|02092010.MOV]], after the CWCipedia was taken offline, he ranted that he wanted to see Alec, Evan, and Mao [[Death threats|executed]]. That's right, serial murderers deserve clemency but people who try to stop Chrissy from [[simonla|stealing intellectual property]] deserve capital punishment.<br /> <br /> Chris later carried out these executions within the pages of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]. This sequence was incredibly hypocritical, as he sentenced them to death and killed them '''as he listed off all the ways in which he wronged them.'''<br /> <br /> In the [[05142010]] video, Chris shows us that he thinks twenty years of menial labor is a suitable punishment for murdering a woman in real life. This is, of course, two and a half months after he revealed that he thought genital mutilation via a large drill was an appropriate response to forcing him to give up a character that didn't belong to him in the first place.<br /> <br /> ==="Don't be a moof or aloof" — Mature content===<br /> {{Quote|I would never do blood and gore. That's just gross|Chris, on [[22 January 2010]].}}<br /> <br /> Chris has severe problems understanding media with mature themes, or, to be specific, media with [[Chris and death|death]]. It appears that Chris is railing heavily against video games that are rated Mature or higher, and thinks that realistic depictions of death in fiction "sadden" him.<ref name="Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8"/> Yet, at the same time, he thought the ''Saw'' movie series was good, ''despite'' the gruesome deaths featured therein. Even if this is not outright hypocrisy, it's still clear that there's something very ''odd'' going on in here; it's clear that he's enjoyed some mature-rated works, but he's still clinging to teen-rated games at best — there are huge amounts of cognitive dissonance at work here.<br /> <br /> Chris has said a number of times in videos and mailbags that his comics will never feature excessive violence and gore. For a long time, Chris took great pains to avoid showing outright death in his comics. [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] was claimed to be kept alive by "dark forces", and [[Liquid Chris]] was [[Sonichu Special 4|shot in the legs]], as a sort of attempt at a nonlethal shooting. The deaths of [[PandaHalo]] and [[Ivy]], while horrific, were both not actually shown, so it was almost as though Chris was keeping his word.<br /> <br /> [[File:Evan'sDeath.JPG|thumb|You know, for kids!]]<br /> <br /> Blatant outright hypocrisy on this matter finally surfaced in the last few pages of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]. He broke this promise in a spectacularly graphic manner, with the (court sanctioned) deaths of the [[Asperpedia]] staff. Alec and Sean were killed by the electric chair and firing squad, respectively. While these are both highly controversial means of inflicting capital punishment, they both exist in the real world as ways to accomplish something as terrible as ending a human life as quickly as possible, and in that way they are arguably humane.<br /> <br /> By contrast, there is nothing humane or even reasonable about the deaths of Evan and Mao. Evan is shackled to a wall, and mutilated for an indeterminate amount of time before being apparently blasted to death by Wild and Sandy. This outright torture included cutting off both of his legs, one of his arms, a series of deep cuts to his torso, and ''genital mutilation via a giant drill''. Mao had his arms and legs telekinetically forced to bend in the wrong direction, causing the snapped bones to rip though his skin. As he lay on the ground, screaming in agony, Chris telekinetically burst his heart with not a bit of [[remorse]] or justification of why.<br /> <br /> All of the violence in the final pages of ''Sonichu'' #10 is particularly egregious when compared to what the ''offenders'' came up with. While Asperchu and [[Asperchu#Sonichu Revolution|''Sonichu Revolution'']] feature violence and gore, it's all clearly over the top and meant to be humorous. Chris's depiction of violence comes across as dead serious, and he seems to hate the offenders with the fury of a thousand suns. Also of note is that most of the violent acts in Asperchu are committed by villains, like Metal Asperchu and [[Silvana]]. In ''Sonichu'', these executions were carried out by the ''heroes'', including a [[Bill the Scientist|doctor]], a [[Sandy Rosechu|little girl]], and the [[Chris|mayor]].<br /> <br /> Chris has difficulties understanding not only mature content when it comes to violence, but also sex and profanity. Chris claims that [[Mailbag_20#Chris_considers_his_audience|his comic is equivalent to a TV-Y7 program]], which according to broadcast standards would mean no sexual content or innuendo whatsoever, even if censored. However, ''Sonichu'' is loaded with sex, pornography, and innuendo, but Chris says it's okay because [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|he'll put tiny stickers over genitalia]]. When asked about all of the sex and violence via mailbag, Chris blamed the FCC.<ref>[[Mailbag_51#The_recent_explosion_of_pornography_in_TV-Y7_cartoons_is_not_Chris.27s_fault|Mailbag 51]]</ref> Chris has stated that [[Mailbag_47#Mellow_out.2C_it.27s_just_furry_porn|showing kids pornography]] is just a way to educate them on things they're going to eventually see. Yet when it comes to profanity, another thing people learn as they become adults, Chris takes great pains to censor swear words and scold others for using them. ''Sonichu'' #10 reveals that profanity may be a capital crime. He'll even censor vaguely offensive words that most kids are allowed to say, such as "damn" and "crap." However, none of this is being done for the children. Chris loves pornography and dislikes when other people swear (note that he swears all the damn time), so that's how his comic is going to be presented.<br /> <br /> ==="Nobody needs the Internet!" — Leaving the Internet forever===<br /> <br /> On the afternoon of 21 March 2010, Chris announced he was [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|leaving the Internet]] for good with a [[Chris and ego|pompous and bombastic]] speech about how the Internet was trivial and unimportant and everyone should go outside and socialize, and stated that the social networking capabilities of the Internet were a [[Pokémon|stupid fad]] which was long since over. Chris acknowledged that putting his [[Dox|personal information]] on the Internet was a bad idea ([[Little_Big_Planet#The_Guardian_of_the_Owl_Kingdom|one]] of [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|many]]), and promised he would no longer upload Sonichu comics or interact with trolls, online or by phone. He resolved to get the Sonichu comics published and interact with real people in his [[Charlottesville|community]]. <br /> <br /> On the evening of 22 March — about a day and a half later — he uploaded a short video where he claimed that he was still depressed, and then went on to state his disapproval with a new voice actor on [[Family Guy]] spin-off ''[[The Cleveland Show]]'' and demanded that the old voice actor resume the role. Chris might be excused for breaking his promise to make a video announcing a major life change, like a [[Bob Chandler|death in the family]], [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|returning to school]], [[Wendy's|finding gainful employment]], or even giving an [[Chris and remorse|actual apology]] to a [[Megan Schroeder|former friend]] he offended with [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|his behavior]]. Instead, Chris chose to make a video simply for the sake of making a video complaining about something inconsequential that didn't affect his life in any way.<br /> <br /> As well, Chris keeps posting more and more videos afterward. When he does, he makes the same claim - that he is "distancing himself from the Internet". However, distancing himself from the Internet is certainly not the same as leaving the Internet. He's still on there, even when he's playing on the PSN. Even if we assume that his definition of "leaving the internet" simply means "Not uploading videos or making comics", he's still failed to hold true to his vow on every occasion he's attempted to leave forever.<br /> <br /> ==="They took all the pretty girls, leaving none for me!" - Romantic rivalry===<br /> <br /> One thing consistent in his [[Love Quest|efforts to get laid]] is his lamenting of women who are already in stable relationships. He, by default, hates all other [[JERKS|men]] simply because women have the option of being with any one of them over him. When he believes he's found a [[sweetheart]], he's insecure and jealous that someone will try to take her away.<br /> <br /> And yet at the same time, he has no problem in sabotaging [[Kacey|other people's relationships]] and [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|taunting]] [[New Address|former boyfriends.]]<br /> <br /> ==Chris on hypocrisy==<br /> {{quote|A: "hypocrite"; an adjective; 1) to be of a belief while not upholding that belief. 2) a total liar. 3) [[Fanbase|an UNTRUE Fan]]. example: When the Sonichu Fan left Sonichu for [[Asperchu|a newer, yet badly drawn, thing]], after having said that they would always enjoy Sonichu forever, is a hypocrite among the Truest and Loyalest Sonichu Fans.|Chris, on what it means to be a hypocrite}}<br /> <br /> In the [[Common_Questions#Answered_20_January_2010|Mailbag questions]], Chris was asked to define "hypocrite." His answer shows that he barely understands the concept, thinks it's some kind of insult (like "naïve" or "benevolent"), and somehow refers to a fan's level of devotion.<br /> <br /> Chris's first definition is very broad, and could be used to describe hypocrisy (one's stated beliefs being in conflict with one's actions), but could also be used to describe a general lack of enthusiasm. Under Chris's definition, a homophobe who doesn't take [[Sonichu 10|drastic measures]] to eradicate homosexuality would be a hypocrite.<br /> <br /> His second definition is just hyperbole, in the same way someone would throw around "fascist" when not using it to describe an [[CWCville|extreme right-wing authoritarian nationalist]].<br /> <br /> Chris's third definition is more of a (failed) example to ''describe'' a hypocrite, and more describes Chris's "if you're not now, you never were" attitude towards fandom. In Chris's mind, he must enjoy all Sonic the Hedgehog games regardless of quality, and wear and display Pokémon merchandise well past an age where that would be considered socially acceptable. Because Chris enjoyed Sonic and Pokémon when he was younger, he's not allowed to move on, grow up, and find other, more adult interests.<br /> <br /> Chris then went on to rail against Asperchu, and refused to acknowledge the dozens of mailbag letters pointing out examples of his hypocrisy, double standards, and contradictions.<br /> <br /> ==Sauces==<br /> <references/><br /> <br /> ==See also==<br /> * [[List of Chris's lies]]<br /> * [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9]]<br /> <br /> {{Chris and}}<br /> [[Category:Chris-chan]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Sonichu_3&diff=124069 Sonichu 3 2010-11-08T21:45:46Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Sub-Episode 4: Christian Chandler in "McAttack" */</p> <hr /> <div>{{Infobox/Comic<br /> | titleandissue = ''Sonichu'' #3<br /> | cover = [[Image:Issue3.jpg|150px]]<br /> | coverdate = 20 June 2005<br /> | finishedcomic = 21 Feb 2006<br /> | pagecount = 45<br /> | episodes = 10-11<br /> | sub-episodes = 4<br /> | previous = [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]<br /> | next = [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]<br /> }}<br /> '''''Sonichu'' #3''' is the fourth issue of the series. <br /> <br /> This issue introduces the [[Chaotic Combo]], the five Electric Hedgehogs who basically exist to be Sonichu and Rosechu's friends. Rather than just have more [[rainbow]] beams hit unsuspecting [[Pokémon]], Chris gets it in his head that baby Sonichus would be cute and decides to spend all of Episode 10 chronicling the entire life stories of five different characters. Each of the Combo's origin stories are virtually identical, as they are created as eggs from the magical rainbow and then deposited umpteen years in the past, where they're adopted by people or Pokémon who cultivate their abilities until they evolve. Making matters worse, Chris's concept for [[Sonee and Rosey|baby Sonichus and Rosechus]] is that they are unable to speak beyond saying "Sonee?" or "Rosey!", thereby guaranteeing page upon page with almost no intelligible dialogue. The troll community almost unanimously agrees that "Sonichu Babies" is one of the most aggravating pieces of Sonichu material made, and is the most likely to result in some kind of violence, due to the irrational anger it can and has caused. This issue took Chris ''seven months'' to complete; even he seems to have struggled to get through it.<br /> <br /> In Episode 11, the Chaotic Combo is united for the first time by Sonichu, whereupon they [[Target|dogpile]] [[Blake|Black Sonichu]] in a six-on-one beatdown.<br /> <br /> ==Episode 10: "Sonichu Babies"==<br /> {{-}}<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title =Sonichu Babies<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_3/Page_1 ''Episode 10''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook#Episode_10{{!}}''Episode 10''<br /> | sonichusite =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchuComic4P1.htm ''Episode 10''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_q_dTiRnkUA&feature=PlayList&p=4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1&index=10 ''Ep. 10 (1 of 2)''<br /> | audiobook2 =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEx92oxso6c&feature=PlayList&p=4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1&index=11 ''Ep. 10 (2 of 2)''<br /> }}<br /> [[Image:MagiChanFarts.JPG|thumb|Inappropriate flatulence is something [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 23rd, 2009|Chris also experiences.]]]]<br /> It is explained that the [[rainbow]] of Chaos Energy that emerged from Sonichu's collision with Sonic created five eggs that landed in various areas within a few miles of [[CWCville]]. [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the narrator, congratulates himself on this cute intro, and presents what [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] would have looked like if they had been born as Sonee and Rosey, which makes no sense because they first appeared fully-grown, having evolved from mature Pokémon.<br /> <br /> Each of these eggs is shown hatching into a new baby [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]. First, the green egg lands in the jungle and the hatchling is raised by a [[Venusaur]] and a [[Scyther]], who teach him various survival skills. In time, [[Wild Sonichu]] develops his ability to shoot vines from his arms, fly with his propeller-like tail (a skill he has never once used), and camouflage himself into his surroundings.<br /> <br /> The blue egg lands in the ocean, where it is recovered by a [[Swampert]] who takes it to the beach to hatch. The resulting Rosey loves to play in the water with her "mother," until one day a [[Boulder-Dropping Whale|Wailord inexplicably drops a boulder]] onto Swampert, causing it to sink into the depths. Terrified, the Rosey tries to save Swampert, but is too weak; however, its effort causes it to evolve, and [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is able to save her. Bubbles is so happy to reveal her origin that she decides to make a seashell necklace (which we never see), just like the stupid vagina-having strumpet she is.<br /> <br /> The white egg somehow ends up at the doorstep of an convent, where it is discovered by some nuns who live there. The nuns raise the white Rosey, who learns the Roman Catholic faith alongside them. They also inexplicably keep her eggshell around, presumably as a memento or proof of a miracle. (Catholics love the latter.) She evolves into [[Angelica Rosechu]] in her sleep one night, and conveniently Christian Chandler is [[attraction location|outside her bedroom window]] with shoes and a scrunchie for her to wear in her new form (even though the other Sonichus and Rosechus just get new clothing for no reason after evolving). <br /> <br /> The red egg crashes into Nabe's [[Wikipedia:dojo|dojo]]-shin, immediately hatching into a Sonee. Inspired by his surroundings, the Sonee tries to fight. Mypoe accepts the Sonee's challenge, and for no apparent reason rips its fucking tail right off its Got-dang body (holy shit!). This trauma causes the Sonee to evolve into [[Punchy Sonichu]]. Punchy uses his impressive strength to Sky Uppercut Mypoe straight through the roof, never to be seen again. Impressed by the apparent murder of his daughter, Nabe offers to teach Punchy the ways of the martial arts, at which Punchy excels.<br /> <br /> The purple egg hatches inside a mysterious mountain, where it seems to be alone. However, the Sonee is telepathically contacted by [[Mewtwo]] from a nearby city. Mewtwo has noticed the Sonee's telepathic powers and wishes the mentor him in the use of those abilities. In this way the Sonee learns to master his abilities and vicariously learns about the outside world and [[Wikipedia:Jackie Chan|Jackie Chan]] movies. One day during his routine meditation he evolves into [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]]. Then he farts. Seriously. Mewtwo congratulates Magi-Chan and sends him off to find his destiny, promising that they will meet in person someday... '''SPOILER:''' They don't.<br /> <br /> ===Advertisement 1===<br /> Join [[MySpace]], the premier online community for dudes of all [[pedofork|teenages]], [[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-minds]], and [[Saddest Heart in the World|cutters]]! Chris already has, and he needs more friends. At this time, Sonichu is his only friend =(<br /> {{-}}<br /> <br /> ===Analysis===<br /> The stories are [[Chris and writing|unsurprisingly dull and clichéd]]. Three of the five stories follow the same pattern: Egg is found by foster parents and hatches, foster parents teach child valuable skills as child struggles to accomplish them, and child evolves after an unspecified time and has suddenly mastered the aforementioned skills. Bubbles's story is similar, without the "valuable skills" part. Punchy's story is the only one that deviates from the formula, and therefore the only one that's remotely interesting. Indeed, the pages each story occupies are nearly identical in layout.<br /> <br /> ==Episode 11: The Chaotic Combo in "When Hedgehogs Meet"==<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title =When Hedgehogs Meet<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_3/Page_13 ''Episode 11''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook#Episode_11{{!}}''Episode 11''<br /> | sonichusite =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchuComic4P7.htm ''Episode 11''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HxjNwj7T_iU&feature=PlayList&p=4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1&index=20 ''Episode 11''<br /> }}<br /> [[Image:Exposition.JPG|thumb|''Sonichu 3'' demonstrates Chris' subtle use of exposition.]]<br /> ''When Hedgehogs Meet'' is probably supposed to sound like a really epic title, but, due to the fact that hedgehogs are inherently silly animals, any such drama falls flat. The story is introduced by [[Flame the Sunbird]], who explains the significance of the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]], a mystical artifact that must remain safe on his island to prevent people from growing or losing extra appendages.<br /> <br /> Just then [[Black Sonichu]] jumps out of a helicopter on orders from [[Naitsirhc]] to steal the very same stone Flame was just telling us about. The black fiend, being larger and stronger than Flame, easily overpowers him and, having a simplistic notion of justice, takes the Sunstone away on his hoverboard. Flame goes after him, and attempts to subdue Black Sonichu with Drill Peck, but the devious darkie uses Double Team to confuse his pursuer.<br /> <br /> Amid this commotion, Black Sonichu's hoverboard somehow creates a wave that washes over the beach as he reaches the mainland, thoroughly drenching [[Bubbles]], who was relaxing on the shore. With little regard for others, Blachu speeds through the jungle, knocking [[Wild]] off-balance as he swings through the trees. Finally, in another part of the wilderness, [[Punchy]] is practicing his punches when he catches his spiky knuckles on the hoverboard, and he is dragged along for the ride.<br /> <br /> Near her convent, [[Angelica]] is using her powers to somehow cause flowers to grow in a lovely pattern that reads "HOPE & PEACE" (Of course, since she's the only one who can fly, she's the only one who can see it. Stupid bitch.). Just then Black Sonichu and Punchy zoom by, with Punchy hitting a tree and falling from the hoverboard. While Angelica checks on Punchy, Bubbles, Wild, and Flame catch up. Each of the hedgehogs is delighted to meet others of their kind, and make introductions. From a distance, [[Magi-Chan]] observes this and realizes the others are forgetting about Blachu, so he zaps off to remind them.<br /> <br /> Meanwhile, [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] finally bothers to show up on page 23 of his own damn comic, having somehow already arrived at the conclusion that a black guy is out stealing things. Just before Blachu can reach the safety of Team Rocket's headquarters, Sonichu intercepts him. After a brief scuffle, Sonichu finds he has reinforcements - Wild, Bubbles, Angelica, Punchy, Flame, and Magi-Chan have all teleported in. Black Sonichu remains defiant, perhaps due to unconscionable amounts of crack cocaine and PCP he has ingested. While Flame falls into a bush and exits the fight, the hedgehogs huddle up and Sonichu comes up with a brilliant strategy:<br /> <br /> {{quote|Avoid his attacks, and attack him with your punches, kicks, wing attacks; that sort!}}<br /> <br /> The [[Chaotic Combo]] employs this plan of attacking their opponent while not letting him hit them, but little strategy is needed when it's six against one, and Black Sonichu is easily beaten by superior numbers.<br /> <br /> ===Advertisement 2===<br /> An advertisement for an escort/prostitution service specifically catered to the needs of welfare-livin', homebound, 20-something male virgins. FREE!<br /> <br /> ==Sub-Episode 4: Christian Chandler in "McAttack"==<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title =McAttack<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_3/Page_31 ''Sub-Episode 4''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook#Sub-Episode_4{{!}}''Sub-Episode 4''<br /> | sonichusite =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchuComic4P16.htm ''Sub-Episode 4''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3G6fHSV7po&feature=PlayList&p=4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1&index=15 ''Sub-Episode 4''<br /> }}<br /> One year and ten months have now passed since [[Christian Weston Chandler]] began his [[Love Quest]], but he has still been unable to locate "an 18-23-year-old, [[boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend free]], caring, [[tobacky|smoke-free]], [[alcohol|non-alcoholic]], white girl to build a relationship from the [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|ground-up]] with." We find Chris at [[McDonald's|M-C-Dville]] in the region of [[Mal-Wart]], drawing comics and listening to music on his [[Nintendo]] DS and generally not purchasing food or otherwise justifying his presence there. He blames his inadequacy on all men everywhere (except for himself and [[Bob Chandler|his father]]), who have taken all of the pretty girls for themselves. In happier thoughts, Chris is glad to have <s>paid for</s> earned a pair of [[Anime Wings|hair clips shaped like wings]] at a recent anime convention, although this prize was probably intended for a twelve-year-old girl.<br /> <br /> Just then, the McDuo of M-C-Dville, [[B-Manajerk]] and [[Merried Seinor Comic]], arrive. They have been notified by the [[Jerkhief]] of [[Fa-Square]] that Christian is on a quest to find true love, which is forbidden in Mal-Wart. Backed up by an army of the Jerkhief's [[Mecha-Jerkops]], they accuse Chris of solicitation. Chris makes a boring speech and refuses to back down, and the Mecha-Jerkops advance upon him. However, just then [[Darkbind Sonichu]] makes his debut, slicing the Mecha-Jerkops into pieces with his sword. Darkbind acknowledges his loyalty to Chris due to him being both the mayor of [[CWCville]] and his creator.<br /> <br /> Chris summons the [[anchuent powers]] of his [[medallion]] to become [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], and somehow the anime wings become real wings on his head, making him into [[Super Chris-chan Sonichu]]. While Darkbind dismembers the cybernetic [[Merried Seinor Comic]], Chris takes to the air to combat [[B-Manajerk]] with Aerial Ace, Double Team, and Thunderbolt. With his trusty [[Pixelblocks]], Chris-Chan creates a decoy of himself, which B-Manajerk mistakes for the real thing and attacks with his axe. The broken pieces of Pixelblocks become lodged his skin, diverting him while Chris sneaks up from behind with a Sky Uppercut. [[Homos|Yes, he did an uppercut to the back.]] With the villains defeated, Darkbind hurries to leave before Chris can revert to human form and deliver his big speech:<br /> <br /> {{quote|Now, as for you two [[Manajerks]], the pain that you both are feeling now should be punishment enough for going against me in my quest for a [[Boyfriend-free girl]] to love and trust! I do not care about your rules, either of you, or any male other than my father and myself! But let me make it perfectly clear that in my quest it is very hard for me to find a girl due to the [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]! And I do not want to risk getting a punch in the face from a [[jerk]]! Also, since the ladies are unable to notice my person, because [[Women's rights|they mostly have shopping on their minds]], I have to loudly spell it out. So, place, just leave me alone with my Love Quest!}}<br /> <br /> This simple request is refused by a voice over the intercom, and Chris finds himself beset by the ruler of the Mal-Wart Region, the dreaded [[W-M-Manajerk]].<br /> <br /> [[Sub-Episode 5|TO BE CONTINUED...]]<br /> <br /> ===Back Cover===<br /> As with ''Sonichu'' #2, early editions feature the personal army request page, while the most recent [[CWCipedia]] version features ''[[Sonichu Adventure]]''.<br /> <br /> ==Gallery==<br /> <center><gallery><br /> Image:Issue3.jpg|Cover<br /> Image:ComicMyspace.jpg|Ad 1: MySpace<br /> Image:1800RITENOW.jpg|Ad 2: 1-800-RITE-NOW<br /> Image:SchuComicFreeBack.jpg|Early Back Cover<br /> Image:Sonichu Adventure for Gamecube.jpg|Revised Back Cover<br /> </gallery></center><br /> <br /> ==See Also==<br /> {{CWCipedia|chris=Sonichu Comic Collection|linkname=the Sonichu Comic Collection}}<br /> *[[Chaotic Combo]]<br /> *[[B-Manajerk]]<br /> *[[Merried Seinor Comic]]<br /> {{Sonichu}}<br /> <br /> [[Category: Sonichu comic book issues]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Sonichu_3&diff=124068 Sonichu 3 2010-11-08T21:24:16Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Episode 10: "Sonichu Babies" */</p> <hr /> <div>{{Infobox/Comic<br /> | titleandissue = ''Sonichu'' #3<br /> | cover = [[Image:Issue3.jpg|150px]]<br /> | coverdate = 20 June 2005<br /> | finishedcomic = 21 Feb 2006<br /> | pagecount = 45<br /> | episodes = 10-11<br /> | sub-episodes = 4<br /> | previous = [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]<br /> | next = [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]<br /> }}<br /> '''''Sonichu'' #3''' is the fourth issue of the series. <br /> <br /> This issue introduces the [[Chaotic Combo]], the five Electric Hedgehogs who basically exist to be Sonichu and Rosechu's friends. Rather than just have more [[rainbow]] beams hit unsuspecting [[Pokémon]], Chris gets it in his head that baby Sonichus would be cute and decides to spend all of Episode 10 chronicling the entire life stories of five different characters. Each of the Combo's origin stories are virtually identical, as they are created as eggs from the magical rainbow and then deposited umpteen years in the past, where they're adopted by people or Pokémon who cultivate their abilities until they evolve. Making matters worse, Chris's concept for [[Sonee and Rosey|baby Sonichus and Rosechus]] is that they are unable to speak beyond saying "Sonee?" or "Rosey!", thereby guaranteeing page upon page with almost no intelligible dialogue. The troll community almost unanimously agrees that "Sonichu Babies" is one of the most aggravating pieces of Sonichu material made, and is the most likely to result in some kind of violence, due to the irrational anger it can and has caused. This issue took Chris ''seven months'' to complete; even he seems to have struggled to get through it.<br /> <br /> In Episode 11, the Chaotic Combo is united for the first time by Sonichu, whereupon they [[Target|dogpile]] [[Blake|Black Sonichu]] in a six-on-one beatdown.<br /> <br /> ==Episode 10: "Sonichu Babies"==<br /> {{-}}<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title =Sonichu Babies<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_3/Page_1 ''Episode 10''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook#Episode_10{{!}}''Episode 10''<br /> | sonichusite =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchuComic4P1.htm ''Episode 10''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_q_dTiRnkUA&feature=PlayList&p=4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1&index=10 ''Ep. 10 (1 of 2)''<br /> | audiobook2 =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEx92oxso6c&feature=PlayList&p=4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1&index=11 ''Ep. 10 (2 of 2)''<br /> }}<br /> [[Image:MagiChanFarts.JPG|thumb|Inappropriate flatulence is something [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 23rd, 2009|Chris also experiences.]]]]<br /> It is explained that the [[rainbow]] of Chaos Energy that emerged from Sonichu's collision with Sonic created five eggs that landed in various areas within a few miles of [[CWCville]]. [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the narrator, congratulates himself on this cute intro, and presents what [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] would have looked like if they had been born as Sonee and Rosey, which makes no sense because they first appeared fully-grown, having evolved from mature Pokémon.<br /> <br /> Each of these eggs is shown hatching into a new baby [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]. First, the green egg lands in the jungle and the hatchling is raised by a [[Venusaur]] and a [[Scyther]], who teach him various survival skills. In time, [[Wild Sonichu]] develops his ability to shoot vines from his arms, fly with his propeller-like tail (a skill he has never once used), and camouflage himself into his surroundings.<br /> <br /> The blue egg lands in the ocean, where it is recovered by a [[Swampert]] who takes it to the beach to hatch. The resulting Rosey loves to play in the water with her "mother," until one day a [[Boulder-Dropping Whale|Wailord inexplicably drops a boulder]] onto Swampert, causing it to sink into the depths. Terrified, the Rosey tries to save Swampert, but is too weak; however, its effort causes it to evolve, and [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is able to save her. Bubbles is so happy to reveal her origin that she decides to make a seashell necklace (which we never see), just like the stupid vagina-having strumpet she is.<br /> <br /> The white egg somehow ends up at the doorstep of an convent, where it is discovered by some nuns who live there. The nuns raise the white Rosey, who learns the Roman Catholic faith alongside them. They also inexplicably keep her eggshell around, presumably as a memento or proof of a miracle. (Catholics love the latter.) She evolves into [[Angelica Rosechu]] in her sleep one night, and conveniently Christian Chandler is [[attraction location|outside her bedroom window]] with shoes and a scrunchie for her to wear in her new form (even though the other Sonichus and Rosechus just get new clothing for no reason after evolving). <br /> <br /> The red egg crashes into Nabe's [[Wikipedia:dojo|dojo]]-shin, immediately hatching into a Sonee. Inspired by his surroundings, the Sonee tries to fight. Mypoe accepts the Sonee's challenge, and for no apparent reason rips its fucking tail right off its Got-dang body (holy shit!). This trauma causes the Sonee to evolve into [[Punchy Sonichu]]. Punchy uses his impressive strength to Sky Uppercut Mypoe straight through the roof, never to be seen again. Impressed by the apparent murder of his daughter, Nabe offers to teach Punchy the ways of the martial arts, at which Punchy excels.<br /> <br /> The purple egg hatches inside a mysterious mountain, where it seems to be alone. However, the Sonee is telepathically contacted by [[Mewtwo]] from a nearby city. Mewtwo has noticed the Sonee's telepathic powers and wishes the mentor him in the use of those abilities. In this way the Sonee learns to master his abilities and vicariously learns about the outside world and [[Wikipedia:Jackie Chan|Jackie Chan]] movies. One day during his routine meditation he evolves into [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]]. Then he farts. Seriously. Mewtwo congratulates Magi-Chan and sends him off to find his destiny, promising that they will meet in person someday... '''SPOILER:''' They don't.<br /> <br /> ===Advertisement 1===<br /> Join [[MySpace]], the premier online community for dudes of all [[pedofork|teenages]], [[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-minds]], and [[Saddest Heart in the World|cutters]]! Chris already has, and he needs more friends. At this time, Sonichu is his only friend =(<br /> {{-}}<br /> <br /> ===Analysis===<br /> The stories are [[Chris and writing|unsurprisingly dull and clichéd]]. Three of the five stories follow the same pattern: Egg is found by foster parents and hatches, foster parents teach child valuable skills as child struggles to accomplish them, and child evolves after an unspecified time and has suddenly mastered the aforementioned skills. Bubbles's story is similar, without the "valuable skills" part. Punchy's story is the only one that deviates from the formula, and therefore the only one that's remotely interesting. Indeed, the pages each story occupies are nearly identical in layout.<br /> <br /> ==Episode 11: The Chaotic Combo in "When Hedgehogs Meet"==<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title =When Hedgehogs Meet<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_3/Page_13 ''Episode 11''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook#Episode_11{{!}}''Episode 11''<br /> | sonichusite =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchuComic4P7.htm ''Episode 11''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HxjNwj7T_iU&feature=PlayList&p=4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1&index=20 ''Episode 11''<br /> }}<br /> [[Image:Exposition.JPG|thumb|''Sonichu 3'' demonstrates Chris' subtle use of exposition.]]<br /> ''When Hedgehogs Meet'' is probably supposed to sound like a really epic title, but, due to the fact that hedgehogs are inherently silly animals, any such drama falls flat. The story is introduced by [[Flame the Sunbird]], who explains the significance of the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]], a mystical artifact that must remain safe on his island to prevent people from growing or losing extra appendages.<br /> <br /> Just then [[Black Sonichu]] jumps out of a helicopter on orders from [[Naitsirhc]] to steal the very same stone Flame was just telling us about. The black fiend, being larger and stronger than Flame, easily overpowers him and, having a simplistic notion of justice, takes the Sunstone away on his hoverboard. Flame goes after him, and attempts to subdue Black Sonichu with Drill Peck, but the devious darkie uses Double Team to confuse his pursuer.<br /> <br /> Amid this commotion, Black Sonichu's hoverboard somehow creates a wave that washes over the beach as he reaches the mainland, thoroughly drenching [[Bubbles]], who was relaxing on the shore. With little regard for others, Blachu speeds through the jungle, knocking [[Wild]] off-balance as he swings through the trees. Finally, in another part of the wilderness, [[Punchy]] is practicing his punches when he catches his spiky knuckles on the hoverboard, and he is dragged along for the ride.<br /> <br /> Near her convent, [[Angelica]] is using her powers to somehow cause flowers to grow in a lovely pattern that reads "HOPE & PEACE" (Of course, since she's the only one who can fly, she's the only one who can see it. Stupid bitch.). Just then Black Sonichu and Punchy zoom by, with Punchy hitting a tree and falling from the hoverboard. While Angelica checks on Punchy, Bubbles, Wild, and Flame catch up. Each of the hedgehogs is delighted to meet others of their kind, and make introductions. From a distance, [[Magi-Chan]] observes this and realizes the others are forgetting about Blachu, so he zaps off to remind them.<br /> <br /> Meanwhile, [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] finally bothers to show up on page 23 of his own damn comic, having somehow already arrived at the conclusion that a black guy is out stealing things. Just before Blachu can reach the safety of Team Rocket's headquarters, Sonichu intercepts him. After a brief scuffle, Sonichu finds he has reinforcements - Wild, Bubbles, Angelica, Punchy, Flame, and Magi-Chan have all teleported in. Black Sonichu remains defiant, perhaps due to unconscionable amounts of crack cocaine and PCP he has ingested. While Flame falls into a bush and exits the fight, the hedgehogs huddle up and Sonichu comes up with a brilliant strategy:<br /> <br /> {{quote|Avoid his attacks, and attack him with your punches, kicks, wing attacks; that sort!}}<br /> <br /> The [[Chaotic Combo]] employs this plan of attacking their opponent while not letting him hit them, but little strategy is needed when it's six against one, and Black Sonichu is easily beaten by superior numbers.<br /> <br /> ===Advertisement 2===<br /> An advertisement for an escort/prostitution service specifically catered to the needs of welfare-livin', homebound, 20-something male virgins. FREE!<br /> <br /> ==Sub-Episode 4: Christian Chandler in "McAttack"==<br /> {{Resources<br /> | title =McAttack<br /> | cwcipedia =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_3/Page_31 ''Sub-Episode 4''<br /> | videobook =Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook#Sub-Episode_4{{!}}''Sub-Episode 4''<br /> | sonichusite =http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchuComic4P16.htm ''Sub-Episode 4''<br /> | audiobook =http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3G6fHSV7po&feature=PlayList&p=4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1&index=15 ''Sub-Episode 4''<br /> }}<br /> One year and ten months have now passed since [[Christian Weston Chandler]] began his [[Love Quest]], but he has still been unable to locate "an 18-23-year-old, [[boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend free]], caring, [[tobacky|smoke-free]], [[alcohol|non-alcoholic]], white girl to build a relationship from the [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|ground-up]] with." We find Chris at [[McDonald's|M-C-Dville]] in the region of [[Mal-Wart]], drawing comics and listening to music on his [[Nintendo]] DS and generally not purchasing food or otherwise justifying his presence there. He blames his inadequacy on all men everywhere (except for himself and [[Bob Chandler|his father]]), who have taken all of the pretty girls for themselves. In happier thoughts, Chris is glad to have <s>paid for</s> earned a pair of [[Anime Wings|hair clips shaped like wings]] at a recent anime convention, although this prize was probably intended for a twelve-year-old girl.<br /> <br /> Just then, the McDuo of M-C-Dville, [[B-Manajerk]] and [[Merried Seinor Comic]], arrive. They have been notified by the [[Jerkhief]] of [[Fa-Square]] that Christian is on a quest to find true love, which is forbidden in Mal-Wart. Backed up by an army of the Jerkhief's [[Mecha-Jerkops]], they accuse Chris of solicitation. Chris makes a boring speech and refuses to back down, and the Mecha-Jerkops advance upon him. However, just then [[Darkbind Sonichu]] makes his debut, slicing the Mecha-Jerkops into pieces with his sword. Darkbind acknowledges his loyalty to Chris due to him being both the mayor of [[CWCville]] and his creator.<br /> <br /> Chris summons the [[anchuent powers]] of his [[medallion]] to become [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], and somehow the anime wings become real wings on his head, making him into [[Super Chris-chan Sonichu]]. While Darkbind dismembers the cybernetic [[Merried Seinor Comic]], Chris takes to the air to combat [[B-Manajerk]] with Aerial Ace, Double Team, and Thunderbolt. With his trusty [[Pixelblocks]], Chris-Chan creates a decoy of himself, which B-Manajerk mistakes for the real thing and attacks with his axe. The broken pieces of Pixelblocks become lodged his skin, diverting him while Chris sneaks up from behind with a Sky Uppercut. Yes, he did an uppercut to the back. With the villains defeated, Darkbind hurries to leave before Chris can revert to human form and deliver his big speech:<br /> <br /> {{quote|Now, as for you two [[Manajerks]], the pain that you both are feeling now should be punishment enough for going against me in my quest for a [[Boyfriend-free girl]] to love and trust! I do not care about your rules, either of you, or any male other than my father and myself! But let me make it perfectly clear that in my quest it is very hard for me to find a girl due to the [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]! And I do not want to risk getting a punch in the face from a [[jerk]]! Also, since the ladies are unable to notice my person, because [[Women's rights|they mostly have shopping on their minds]], I have to loudly spell it out. So, place, just leave me alone with my Love Quest!}}<br /> <br /> This simple request is refused by a voice over the intercom, and Chris finds himself beset by the ruler of the Mal-Wart Region, the dreaded [[W-M-Manajerk]].<br /> <br /> [[Sub-Episode 5|TO BE CONTINUED...]]<br /> <br /> ===Back Cover===<br /> As with ''Sonichu'' #2, early editions feature the personal army request page, while the most recent [[CWCipedia]] version features ''[[Sonichu Adventure]]''.<br /> <br /> ==Gallery==<br /> <center><gallery><br /> Image:Issue3.jpg|Cover<br /> Image:ComicMyspace.jpg|Ad 1: MySpace<br /> Image:1800RITENOW.jpg|Ad 2: 1-800-RITE-NOW<br /> Image:SchuComicFreeBack.jpg|Early Back Cover<br /> Image:Sonichu Adventure for Gamecube.jpg|Revised Back Cover<br /> </gallery></center><br /> <br /> ==See Also==<br /> {{CWCipedia|chris=Sonichu Comic Collection|linkname=the Sonichu Comic Collection}}<br /> *[[Chaotic Combo]]<br /> *[[B-Manajerk]]<br /> *[[Merried Seinor Comic]]<br /> {{Sonichu}}<br /> <br /> [[Category: Sonichu comic book issues]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=CWCki:Frequently_Asked_Questions&diff=123973 CWCki:Frequently Asked Questions 2010-11-08T17:34:48Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Questions and Answers */</p> <hr /> <div>==Introduction==<br /> <br /> New people are being initiated to the horrors of the world of [[Christian Weston Chandler]] every day. Some of these people have simple questions that the veteran [[Miscreant]] might be able to answer with the greatest of ease. However, people hate being asked the same questions time and time again, so this page shall serve as a quick database of some of the most common questions encountered.<br /> <br /> All the questions can be answered in more detail than they appear here, which should be an incentive for you to go peruse the wiki and other resources to learn all you can about everyone's favorite manchild.<br /> <br /> ==Questions and Answers==<br /> <br /> ; Is Chris a troll?<br /> : No; the documentation on his entire life and testimony by real life people (including Chris [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile|himself]]) including [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|media reports]] [[IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES|predating the Internet]] and no fewer than two [[The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer|independent]] [[University_of_Virginia#UVA_student_on_Chris|accounts]] are way too complete for it to be an elaborate reverse-troll setup. If Chris is indeed faking this, somehow managing to fabricate an entire past, create [[Slideshow|hundreds of photos from his past]], control the media, get a huge number of people in on this, then he is the greatest troll and ''avant garde'' artist in history. However, [[Wikipedia:Occam's Razor|Occam's Razor]] would suggest that Chris is just REALLY STUPID and really believes the things he does and does stupid things for reasons he believes are logically sound.<br /> <br /> ; Why doesn't he just find a prostitute?<br /> : He wants [[love quest|TRUE and HONEST love]]. Prostitutes are expensive, and he wants a mothering companion. When prostitutes were sent to his house, Chris cried. Chris said in [[Mumble 4]] that he wouldn't hire a hooker out of fear of STDs. Though truth be told, Chris is cheap and odds are he'd find a crack whore too expensive. As to illustrate this point: it was discovered that he DID try to solicit the services of a prostitute by phone, but tried to get a discount by offering the chance of deflowering him and telling his life story; the prostitute hung up on him.<ref>[[Chris and sex|#Prostitution]]</ref><br /> <br /> ; How can you get off taunting an [[autistic]] guy?<br /> : We don't do it because he's autistic, but rather because he's a [[Niggos|racist]], [[Chris and sex|sexist]], [[Homos|homophobic]], [[Chris and death|unsympathetic]], [[Bob Chandler|ungrateful]], [[Manchester High School#Graduation|jealous]], [[The GAMe PLACe|kid-scaring]] and [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|troll-feeding]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissistic]], [[Bagget|spitefully]] [[Kick the Autistic|antagonistic]] [[Parody|thief]] and an all-around [[fail|failure]] who wastes the hard-earned [[Monthly tugboat|tax money]] of average Americans on [[video games]] and [[sex toys]] while contributing nothing to society despite his basic abilities. Furthermore, he's someone who realizes he has a problem and what he does doesn't work but refuses to get help, even ignoring the help of [[white knights|well meaning individuals]].<br /> <br /> ; Can he be helped? Should I try?<br /> : [[Vivitheg|People]] [[Jackie|who are]] [[Clyde Cash|better]] [[Alec Benson Leary calls|than]] [[Sarah May|you]] have tried and have accomplished [[Virginia Jeanine Sanford|nothing]]. See the "[[white knight]]" article for reasons for and against ''trying'' to save Chris. Regardless of how hard you try, you won't be able to do it. Seriously, consider [[Svenka]] - she posted pictures of the very [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] that would steal Chris's date, [[Emily]], months in advance of the plan yet Chris still fell for it. <br /> <br /> :For recorded attempts to help Chris, see [[White knight emails]]. <br /> <br /> ; Is he seeing a psychiatrist?<br /> : Chris is seeing a church counselor, [[Rocky]]. He refuses to get professional help because he refuses to spend money on something that's not video game-related and because he thinks God, Jesus, and his church will him pull through [[Vivitheg's AIM chat|much better]].<br /> <br /> ; Is he really autistic?<br /> : This is debated, but the claim has never really been falsified. Some argue that he has [[autism|high-functioning autism]]; however, please note that high-functioning autism is an informal term with no actual medical significance to it (you won't find the term in any official publication by the American Psychiatric Association). Based on a cursory [[Autism papers#Intake Survey|psychiatric survey]] from [[2004]], his diagnosis was autism (DSM-IV 299.00).<br /> <br /> ; Does he have [[Asperger syndrome]]?<br /> : Depends on what you define as "having" Asperger's. He has never been formally diagnosed as having Asperger syndrome, he has never claimed to have it, and in fact, he angrily rejects the label outright. However, it needs to be noted that "Asperger's" did not exist as a formally recognized diagnosis when Chris was diagnosed as "high functioning autistic" as a child in the 1980's. There is a very good case to be made that Chris would most likely be given the "Asperger's" label if he was a child today. <br /> <br /> ; Is he retarded?<br /> : Socially retarded, yes, mentally retarded, not quite. He somehow managed to graduate from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|community college]] and obtain a [[:Image:License.jpg|driver's license]]. Chris does understand the consequences of his actions, has a consistent ethical system (albeit a warped, self-serving one), and recognizes what he's doing isn't working, yet he chooses to pin the blame on external forces or goes about his way anyways. The more likely answer to his perceived retardation is that he is just really, really stupid.<br /> <br /> ; Is he [[homos|gay]]?<br /> : This is a hotly debated point, and as of yet there's no consensus on this. He's certainly into women and [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] while thinking about women; on the other hand, he clearly believes that previously-straight people can be turned gay, either by accident or through being tricked, makes a practice of meditating upon [[Sailor Moon]] in order to keep himself straight, and [[semen|he drinks his own semen every time he masturbates]]. Most likely, Chris is either a) a homophobic straight guy who thinks people can be duped into straying from the straight path because he's an idiot, b) a homophobic bi-curious guy who thinks people can be duped into straying from the straight path because he personally has homoerotic fantasies that he desperately tries to suppress, or c) too immature to have a real sexual preference, so he ends up overdoing his straightness.<br /> <br /> ; Is he a furry?<br /> : Definite maybe. He states that he does not consider himself one<ref>[[Sarah_Reveals_Herself#Chris_tries_to_leave|Chris admits to Sarah May that he is slightly turned on by Rosechu, though he maintains he is not a furry]]</ref>, though he admits to being turned on by [[Rosechu]] (not as much as a human female, natch), has drawn [[Rule 34]] artwork of his characters, and has depicted himself as [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] having sex with a furry version of his ex-[[sweetheart]] [[Ivy]]. He is a furry in the sense that he clearly derives enjoyment from sexualized anthropomorphic animal characters, and personally identifies with a particular anthro character; he is not a furry in the sense that he does not participate in the wider furfag community. Lucky bastards.<br /> <br /> ; Is he a [[pedofork|pedophile]]?<br /> : Probably not, but it's fun to imply otherwise. One of the few kind things [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] said about Chris in a [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A|troll Q&A thread]] was that he probably wasn't a pedophile and that people are trying too hard with that. However, given that he [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|stares at a poster with a six year old anime girl on it to stay straight]], the fact that he got [[CWC's Second Message|furious]] when accused of being a pedophile (similarly to how he becomes hostile when being accused of being a [[homo]]), and the fact that [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] were originally jailbait engaging in sexual activity (and even by current [[Sonichu canon]], Rosechu was underage when she married Sonichu), there's an argument to be made. He also has stated he would like to lower his state's legal age of consent to 16, but this is more likely due to his inability to move past [[high school]] than latent pedophilia. In short, he's not a baby fucker but he'll play ball if grass is on the field.<br /> <br /> ; What does he smell like?<br /> : According to [[Emily]], "rotten watermelons." According to [[Robert Simmons V]], a variant of the homeless person stank. According to field agents, body odor masked with gallons of [[Axe]]. Point is, [[Chris and Health#Hygiene|Chris smells awful]].<br /> <br /> ; What's the deal with [[Sonic]], anyway?<br /> : He has always liked kids games, and has won a [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|Sega contest]] that allowed him to stock up on Sonic titles. Sonic appears to have certain qualities that attract autistic people more than other titles such as Mario. <br /> <br /> ; What's the deal with the shirts he always wears?<br /> : Chris buys his [[shirt]]s from the Salvation Army and Goodwill.<br /> <br /> ; What's the deal with the [[Shirt#Wrist_warmer|yellow thing]] on the back of the [[Medallion of Fail|medallion]] chain?<br /> : It's a wrist warmer he wears because the chain irritates his skin.<br /> <br /> ; Does Chris drink or do drugs?<br /> : Chris is firmly against [[Tobacky|smoking]] and drug use. As far as [[Alcohol|drinking]] is concerned, Chris used to be against it as well, but in an ironic twist, video of him drinking a [[semen|salty]] tasting [[Long Island Iced Tea]] recently surfaced, and it appears he's [[Rollin' and Trollin'|repealed the alcohol ban]] in [[CWCville]], making him a waffler. Given this was self-serving, it should surprise no one.<br /> <br /> ; Can I give suggestions on how next to troll Chris?<br /> : <s>Post it on PVCC or /cwc/. The trolls closest to Chris do look at these and do read these boards for suggestions. Just don't suggest something stupid like [[Krapple|dig up Patty's corpse]].</s> It is best not to use these forums, as the former is closed to the public and the latter highly frowns upon using the forums as a base for trolling. Try [[Sonichu (IRC chat)|#sonichu]] instead.<br /> <br /> ; Why doesn't Chris just lie and tell us he isn't a [[Virgin with rage|virgin]] anymore?<br /> : Because he's fucking stupid and besides, we'd see through it like all his other [[lies]].<br /> <br /> ; Where can I find the uncensored images from [[Sonichu 8]]?<br /> : [[Sonichu_8#The_uncensored_scenes|Here]], you sick fuck.<br /> <br /> ; Was [[Ivy]] imaginary?<br /> : No.<br /> <br /> ; I'm a complete twerp, and I keep reading on [[ED]] and [[YouTube]] that [[Ivy]] is his sex doll. Is this so?<br /> : No. His sex dolls are [[Kimmi]] and [[Officer Nasty]]. [[Kimmi]] has acted as a prop representing Ivy in some videos - hence the confusion - but Ivy is most definitely real and was in contact with Chris. Disregard anything you read on either ED or YouTube. The [[CWCki]] is the only TRUE and HONEST source for Chris-related material.<br /> <br /> ; I want to email Chris and pretend to be [[Megan]]/[[Jimmy Hill]]. Can I have his email?<br /> : It's ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com. But srsly, Chris doesn't read his e-mails.<br /> <br /> ; What's this about Chris hating [[Harry Potter]]?<br /> : As Chris mentions [[Mailbag_7#Harry Potter: total spaz|here]] and [[Mumble 2|here]], Chris pretty much hated it since it was "competition" for [[Pokémon]]. <br /> <br /> ; What's this about Jimmy Hill?<br /> : [[Jimmy Hill]] was a trolling effort run by the Something Awful Sychophant Squad (SASS), but disintegrated in [[November 2008]] at the same time the board collapsed. It was supposed to make Chris believe someone was stealing his [[Sonichu]] character, since possible theft of Sonichu seems to be one of the few things that gets him worked up into a fury. Chris stopped believing in Jimmy Hill some time after when he noticed the page never updated. This may be the only recorded example of Chris realizing that someone was a troll without them openly declaring it. Despite this, he still has a grudge against Jimmy Hill, leaving him in the final version of [[Sonichu 10]] from [[December 2009]]. <br /> <br /> : Of note, Jimmy Hill passed the "rights" to Sonichu in Europe to [[Liquid Chris|the TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler]].<br /> <br /> ; Why does Chris call his welfare check a "[[monthly tugboat]]"?<br /> : Basically, it's a very weird contortion of the phrase "Our ship has come in," referring to a fortuitous event. Whereas winning the lottery is like a large cruise ship coming in, for Chris, getting $809 a month for sitting on his ass is like a small boat — like a tugboat — coming in for him.<br /> <br /> ; Where does Chris currently publish new content?<br /> : Chris's current [[YouTube]] channel is [http://www.youtube.com/user/ChristianWChandler ChristianWChandler]. Chris's [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|original web site]] is dead, as is his wiki, the [[CWCipedia]].<br /> <br /> ; What are his dox?<br /> : Chris goes through [[Mailbag|mail]] and supposedly filters out [[troll]] letters. His parents do likewise, though they sometimes read the content but disregard it as something they already know. If you think writing a handwritten letter to Chris or his parents will somehow force him to read it and convince him to change the errors of his ways (or doing something lulzy), you are almost certainly out of luck.<br /> <br /> : Likewise, with Chris's phone; generally they let it go to the answering machine since so many trolls call, or [[Bob]] will pick up the phone and keep track of who calls for legal reasons. Chris will generally not answer his cellphone unless it's a number he knows.<br /> <br /> : But if you insist, you can find them <s>on the [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page CWCipedia]</s> [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!|here]].<br /> <br /> ; Where can I learn more about this guy?<br /> : Well, right here at [[CWCki|this fine wiki]] of course. If you really want to induct yourself into the horrors of Chris, I would recommend starting with where it began for most of us: the [[Megan|Megan Saga and the release of the email correspondence between the two]]. Other resources include:<br /> <br /> :* [[/cwc/]] imageboard<br /> :* [[Sonichu (IRC chat)|#sonichu (IRC chat)]]<br /> :* [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]<br /> :* [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] (Not quite as reliable.)<br /> <br /> ==References==<br /> <references /><br /> <br /> <br /> [[Category:Special]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Attention_All_Sonichu_Fans_(NOT_HATERS)&diff=123204 Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS) 2010-11-05T15:08:39Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div>"'''Attention All Sonichu Fans'''" is a 6 [[August 2008]] video in which [[Chris]], believing that a vast online [[Sonichu]] fan base exists to serve as his personal army, addresses only those ''Sonichu'' fans who do not hate him, telling them to send hate e-mail to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] until the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page is deleted, so that he can work on [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comics]] in peace.<br /> <br /> Christian's apparent assumption that he can direct a public [[YouTube]] video to a specific audience was a major inspiration to the work of [[Robert Simmons V]], who posted videos instructing certain parties not to watch.<br /> <br /> ==Watch==<br /> <br /> {{Infobox/video<br /> | name = Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)<br /> | image = {{#ev:youtube|SyENl3tNyc8}}<br /> | Stardate = 06 [[August 2008]]<br /> | Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br /> | Subject Matter = [[ED]]<br /> | Performance Style = {{Rage|text}}<br /> | Saga = {{ED|text}}<br /> | Shirt = {{PokeShirt|text}}<br /> | previous = [[CWC's_Second_Message#Video|CWC's Second Message]]<br /> | next = [[Kudos_to_the_Encyclopedia_DramaDestruction#Watch|Kudos to the Encyclopedia DramaDestruction]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> <br /> {{quote|I have your number, and you're going down!| Chris, making another threat.}}<br /> <br /> ===Transcript===<br /> <br /> Attention all ''[[Sonichu]]'' fans on the Internet who do ''not'' hate me, [[Christian Weston Chandler]]: ...for I have an important message for y'all.<br /> <br /> If y'all would actually like me to bring up [[Sonichu 7|new stuff]] for Sonichu and conclude the stories, you can do so by takin'—by havin' that [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page taken down, so that I can feel more comfortable in drawing and coloring the comics that y'all have grown to love. ''Not'' counting those who are givin' me all the hate.<br /> <br /> ''But'', on that note, I have the bigger update: if you want to send all your complaints for me not doing the work that I should be doing, you can send every last complaint to the one called “''Jason… Kendrick… Howell''”... also known as “Howellgames” or “[[Metal Gear Solid|LiquidSnake]]”. For he is, and I quote, (in a email he sent me) the creator of the Encyclopedia Dramatica (ED) page for me. And he states further:<br /> <br /> <blockquote>“My, my… you seemed rather angry about it in [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008|your last YouTube video]]. A few months ago, you asked me ''why'' I made the page for you. My reason? You are j—you are too damn funny to ignore. Also, the page will ''not'' be brought down. ''Toodles''!”</blockquote><br /> <br /> He is the Dork of Ages. Y'all should be sending every last complaint and hatred towards—rain down upon him. Send him every last email you can. Shower him with as much hate as possible until that Encyclopedia Dramatica page is taken ''down'', [''gives a thumbs down''] along with him.<br /> <br /> And again, the email address… [''holds up a piece of paper with Howell's full name, aliases, and email address''] send all your hatred to him. Every last ounce. Because he is the man to complain to, for he is the one who created that… dang page.<br /> <br /> And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one ounce of [[vagina]], [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|I have your number, and you're going ''down''!]]<br /> <br /> ==See also==<br /> *[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]<br /> *[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]<br /> <br /> {{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC's Second Message]]|nextlink=[[Kudos to the Encyclopedia DramaDestruction]]|}}<br /> <br /> {{Captain's Log}}<br /> <br /> [[Category: Captain's log entries| 2008-08-06]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DeviantART&diff=123203 DeviantART 2010-11-05T15:04:04Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div>{{quote|This account will mainly be used to get in touch with choice Fan Artists.|~Cwcipedia DA journal, on why the comments are disabled in all of Chris's pictures}}<br /> <br /> '''deviantART''' is a large online art community where artists can host their artwork, and receive comments and critique from fellow artists and art appreciators. <br /> <br /> In the [[trolling]] world, deviantArt is notoriously known as a den for [[Sonic]] [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|recolors]] so it's no surprise that [[Chris]] became a member under these accounts:<br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> * [http://sonichusite.deviantart.com/ SonichuSite] &mdash; banned for a kinda nebulously defined failure, likely the blatant pornography from [[Sonichu 7]]. In his next account's Journal, Chris said he [[Chris and Remorse|has no idea why he was banned.]] Reading comprehension is apparently not part of [[Honor Roll|the most prestigious reaches of American education]].<br /> <br /> * [http://cwcipedia.deviantart.com/ Cwcipedia] &mdash; registered some time before [[CWCipedia]]'s downtime, and Chris used it as his primary breathing hole over the long outage. The account was banned in 28 [[August 2009]] for evasion of the previous ban and posting erotic artwork featuring underage characters (which is to say, [[Rosechu]]'s washing machine pic from [[Sonichu 9|Episode 20]] &mdash; it was actually deleted before the account was banned completely).<br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> As in the case of [[YouTube]] and [[Wikipedia]], Chris really doesn't understand the point of the website; deviantART doesn't call itself an "art community" for no reason. Chris used deviantART only to post his works and fan art (without attribution, of course); deviantART ''would'' have made it relatively painless to truly interact with his "[[fans]]." Chris, however, thinks that "interaction" means ''he'' posts his original and true creations and ''others'' stay put. In other words, he thinks deviantART is a place to dump images, and the whole "community" aspect is just too grandiose to comprehend.<br /> <br /> One of the big strengths of deviantART is that people can comment on the pictures, and allowing comments to be posted is one of the unwritten common-sense rules of the site. Having comments disabled or seeing a bunch of "Hidden by owner" entries is often a sign of an artist with community relations issues (read: "soon to be featured in [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]"). Chris systematically disabled comments in all of his submissions, possibly because he knows that nothing good could come out of it, but also possibly because this is his idea of keeping in touch with his fans.<br /> <br /> In CWCipedia's [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Communities Communities] page, Chris lists [http://sonichufanclub.deviantart.com/ SonichuFanclub] as an officially sanctioned [[Sonichu]] dA community. All signs point out that the community is ''most certainly'' run by the [[True and Loyal Fanbase]] ''*winkwinknudgenudgesaynomore*''.<br /> <br /> {{stub}}<br /> {{CWCipedia}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Websites]]<br /> [[Category:Chris's websites]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DrainedCreativity&diff=123201 DrainedCreativity 2010-11-05T14:55:02Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div>'''DrainedCreativity''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris bemoans the trolls for draining his creativity. This video could be a logical explanation on why there's a shortage of Sonichu comics, if we didn't already know it's because Chris is horrendously lazy.<br /> <br /> ==Video==<br /> <br /> {{Infobox/video<br /> | name = DrainedCreativity<br /> | video = {{#ev:youtube|XttDWIHMEdM}}<br /> | stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]<br /> | subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}<br /> | style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Rage|Anger}}<br /> | shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}<br /> | previous = [[Book10Replacement]]<br /> | next = [[DivineTrial]]<br /> }}<br /> <br /> ===Transcript===<br /> <br /> Well, you trolls and [[Clyde Cash]]… I hope you all are happy.<br /> <br /> ''[Chris performs a dramatic glasses removal.]''<br /> <br /> You quit— you put me down so much then, belittle my— belittle my [[Chris and copyright|creativity]] and my [[Chris and art|artistic capabilities]]. Pretty much made me sca— pretty much made me nearly scared to draw and think creatively. You drained me! [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k96sAezF-VE You DRAINED ME], you damned idiots. Sons of bitches.<br /> <br /> {{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Book10Replacement]]|nextlink=[[DivineTrial]]}}<br /> <br /> {{Troll Videos}}<br /> <br /> {{Clyde Saga}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_Chris%27s_edits_to_the_CWCki&diff=121997 List of Chris's edits to the CWCki 2010-10-26T14:30:36Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* 12:44 */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:chrisshotweb.jpg|thumb|right|Summary of the incident.]]<br /> After Chris discovered the [[CWCki]] in [[March 2010]], he [[Cwc_blog#14 March 2010|demanded]] that pages related to his family and [[Gal-Pal]]s be removed, giving two deadlines. Around midnight on [[April 2010|1 April]], past the second deadline, he decided to attack CWCki, signing up as [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|GodofThunderGodofWar]]. In true CWC style, his [[Special:Contributions/GodofThunderGodofWar|vandalism]] was [[fail|less than impressive]]. In fact, due to the fact that he made them on April Fools' Day, many users just assumed that it was an elaborate and lulzy prank on the part of the administrators. But no, it was f'real.<br /> <br /> Although Chris originally demanded that the CWCki's administrators only edit or remove pages related to his friends and family, it is perhaps telling that when he finally set himself to actively vandalizing the site, he ignored those pages, choosing instead to make edits [[Chris and his Ego|glorifying himself]].<br /> <br /> (Please note that all times listed are EST.) <br /> <br /> ==The edits==<br /> ===12:35===<br /> His first action was to edit the Did You Know? column, removing the majority of the factoids while adding a few of his own, most of which were merely rewrites of existing comments.<br /> <br /> {{quotebox|<br /> *...This webiste, the CWCki, is a LOAD OF BULL?<br /> *...that Christian Chandler ALWAYS IS the mayor of [[CWCville]]?<br /> *...that [[Pixelblocks]] are not to be confused with neither [[Pickles|Pickleblocks]] nor [[Prickly-Wicklies|Pricklyblocks]]?<br /> *...that Chris buys [[McDonalds|healthy food]], [[My Coke Rewards|good drinks]] and just [[PS3|necessities]] with [[Monthly_Tugboat|Good Money]]?<br /> *...that Chris has been recording himself as early as [[Song of Christian|10th grade]]?<br /> }}<br /> <br /> <br /> Chris left the following factoids untouched:<br /> <br /> *...that a [[Curse-ye-ham-ye-ha Retraction|Forgiveness blessing]] can counter the extreme bad luck and misfortune associated with the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] attack?<br /> *...that [[Chris]]'s sense of humor is [[Random-access humor|SO RANDOM XDXD]]?<br /> *...that Chris is the [[The Game Place#Chris.27s_antics|Level Up King]]?<br /> *...that [[Virginia is for Virgins]]?<br /> *...that Chris really likes [[Britney Spears]] (no matter what they all say)? <br /> :*...that his favorite song from "[[:Image:CWCSchuBrit.jpg|Air Britney]]" is ''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHbCK3ETweQ E-Mail My Heart]''?<br /> *...that Chris is a descendant of [[Anne Boleyn]], Queen of England?<br /> <br /> Note how he failed to [[autism|notice the sarcasm]] in the above comments.<br /> <br /> ''Note: In his original edit, the link "10th grade" linked to a non-existent "10th grade" page.''<br /> <br /> ===12:42===<br /> He then changed the Article of the Now from [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] to himself.<br /> <br /> {{quotebox|<br /> [[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|right|200px|lolwut.]]<br /> <br /> '''Christian Weston Chandler''' (born '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]) is a [[autism|high-functioning autistic]] [[virgin with rage|virgin]], Honest, Cool and Honest Dude, and creator of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[Chris and his Ego|brilliant]] character, starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].<br /> <br /> His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of most Normal Human Beings; Finding their Meaning of Existence, Their [[Love Quest|True Love]], Their own [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Self-Character]]. No One should ever interfere or ever make a mockery of such a [[Chris and English|tride]] and true quest to finding HIS own Happiness with [[Women's Rights|his]] WOMAN who is to be his Wife.<br /> <br /> Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter.<br /> }}<br /> ''Note: In his original edit, the link "brilliant" linked to a non-existent "brilliant" page.''<br /> <br /> ===12:44===<br /> A couple of minutes after, he made the infamous [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]] the Picture of the Now.<br /> <br /> {{quotebox|[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|300px|left|lolwut?]]<br /> <br /> A recently leaked image shows an illustration by [[Chris]] having [[Chris and sex|Sweet, Sweet Sex]] with three young women, including a white one, a black one, and one in-between.[[Random-access humor|Chocolate-Vanilla Swirls!!! YAY! 8D]]}}<br /> ''Note: In his original edit, the link "Sweet, Sweet Sex" linked to a non-existent "Sweet, Sweet Sex" page.''<br /> <br /> ==See Also==<br /> * [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]<br /> <br /> {{Lists}}<br /> <br /> [[category:Lists]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Talk:Main_Page&diff=110349 Talk:Main Page 2010-08-24T17:19:44Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* New Article of the now/discussion page cleanup */</p> <hr /> <div>{{protip|This talk page should serve as a place to discuss improving the overall front page of CWCki. For discussion on improvements to CWCki overall, please see the [[CWCki:Community Portal|Community Portal]]. For discussing individual front page templates, please refer to the discussion pages of those templates.}}<br /> <br /> ""Wait, what?"" - I read the changes to Chris' blog- girlfriend?! What do we think folks- a troll, or entirely fictional? I'm inclined to go with the latter, since every time Chris even so much as has a woman not completely blow him off he is screaming it from the rooftops. Should we ask him in the mailbag if this is finally the end of his Love Quest? Is this Lovely Weather, or Chloe? So many questions! -- Ronichu (the TRUE and ORIGINAL Rosechu/Sonichu hybrid character, do not steal!) <br /> <br /> '''Archives''': [[Talk:Main Page/Archive 1|1]]<br /> <br /> Mailbag 41 is up. Also, there are now a glorious Asperchu-related YouTube video embedded on the top half of the page. Nice one! <br /> <br /> == Categorizing videos based on Saga, Performance style, and Subject matter?==<br /> Is it possible to add those features to the [[List of Videos|List of Videos]] page? Or would that prove too much of a clusterfuck, as it would make the page extraordinarily long?<br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> == New Article of the now/discussion page cleanup ==<br /> The article of the now hasn't changed in awhile. May I choose a new one? Also, can someone clean up this discussion page?<br /><br />'''These topics are OLD and should be deleted:'''<br />Lock this page<br />Someone with move rights...<br />25 Days without an outrage my ass!<br /><br /> <br /> == Lock this page ==<br /> I think it is about time that this page is locked so only admins can edit it.--[[User:Blachman|Blachman]] 18:59, 23 September 2009 (CEST)<br /> <br /> *Seconded. Very seconded. [[User:LStaley416|LStaley416]] 19:01, 23 September 2009 (CEST)<br /> *To be fair, the reason why it's unlocked is because in my opinion, I know that I'm proned to fucking shit up when I tinker with the front page and people might actually want to add something neat to the front page. I understand the concern due to recent vandalism, so if others users feel this way, then the front page will be locked. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 19:05, 23 September 2009 (CEST)<br /> *Is it possible to change the new user creation so it requires admin approval? That'd make it harder for faggots to simply sign up and vandalize the place, you could make them go through the IRC channel or something. Of course, that goes against the idea of a wiki being open to editing, but there's not really a nice way of stopping vandalism. [[User:SirCucumber|SirCucumber]] 19:27, 23 September 2009 (CEST)<br /> :*CWCki, as I see it, strives to be open and people should be encouraged to edit it. Going into IRC shouldn't really be a prerequisite of CWCki. Some people don't like IRC and that's fine. Frankly, we're not really in a position to restrict users. As cogs said, she's working on installing an extension which will can easily spot vandalism and reverse it instantly since Cogs, myself, and Clyde can't monitor CWCki every single second. There's some really neat stuff bots can do with MediaWiki in respect to vandalism. But anyways, any wiki is subject to vandalism, but we learn to handle it and hopefully an extensions and maybe an anti-vandalism patrol will help. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:34, 23 September 2009 (CEST) <br /> *well, it's only one person, and the vandalism is fairly regular. i think granting some users anti-vandalism powers and possibly installing an extension will do. --[[User:Cogsdev|cogsdev/vedsgoc]] 19:43, 23 September 2009 (CEST)<br /> <br /> == Someone with move rights... ==<br /> <br /> ...plz move Main Page/Archive 1 to [[Talk:Main Page/Archive 1]]. What happens in Talk: should stay in Talk:, and people who (for example) whack [[Special:Random]] should be spared from these ramblings =) --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' <span style="font-size:smaller;">([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]])</span> 19:59, 23 September 2009 (CEST)<br /> *Good point, sometimes I miss small details like that D:. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:34, 23 September 2009 (CEST)<br /> <br /> Chris has uploaded pages 84[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Image:SchuComic9P84.jpg] and 85[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Image:SchuComic9P85.jpg] Someone with rights update kthnxbai [[User:Sandworm|Sandworm]] 00:44, 25 November 2009 (CET)<br /> <br /> == Streamlining ==<br /> <br /> There are a few modifications that I think the front page really needs. Namely, there needs to be an area that links to all the general areas most important to understanding Chris, such as the comics, the videos, the troll sagas, the CWCisms, etc. I recommend replacing the links in the "CWC Canon" with this. Do we really need a direct link to [[How the Pokémon came into Our Poke Balls]]? --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 00:00, 1 December 2009 (CET)<br /> *The thing is, those are texts directly written by Chris himself. It's like, the direct word of Chris while everything else is merely commentary. Personally, I think Chris's Wikipedia page is like the perfect introduction to hear how fucked up Chris is from Chris himself for those who are uninitiated. However, I think it might be handy to have like a "Essentials" box of key articles.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 19:29, 5 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == 25 Days Without an Outage, My Ass! ==<br /> <br /> That is all. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 01:24, 11 December 2009 (CET)<br /> <br /> == CWCipedia Tracker needs to be updated ==<br /> <br /> The CWCipedia Tracker needs to be updated so it says thatChris answered the letters in Mailbag 24. Also, it probably should say he fell for a tranny.<br /> :...Then update it.<br /> :Also, sign your posts.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:20, 30 December 2009 (CET)<br /> :: Done with care and just for you, dear Anonymous!!! [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 04:22, 30 December 2009 (CET)<br /> :::And that is why Griffintown is a better person than me--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:44, 30 December 2009 (CET)<br /> <br /> == Suggestions for video of the now ==<br /> Idk if this is a good place to do this, tell me if it is or not, I'm kinda new to this wiki, and wiki's in general, but [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vxdvUwhg7jg Christian Weston Chandler CWC Sonichu's confession] [[User:Toughdog6789|Toughdog6789]] 06:15, 3 January 2010 (CET)<br /> *Link fixed. Meh, seems long and tedious. I couldn't get through it. --[[User:Dude|Dude]] 06:42, 3 January 2010 (CET)<br /> :*It's pretty lulzy at the end. --[[User:Toughdog6789|Toughdog6789]] 07:06, 3 January 2010 (CET)<br /> *Another suggestion http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3bvd0XIMZU--[[User:Toughdog6789|Toughdog6789]] 22:38, 6 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> :*This was already the video of the now around 30 December or so. Also in the future, please go [[:Template talk:Video of the now|here]] to suggest videos for the Video of the now.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:18, 6 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> *found this thing http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLHtpVY3lhQ&feature=related just suggesting ,[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 23:10, 25 April 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ==Missed Comic days==<br /> Should we really count the days that the CWCipedia was down against him? He couldn't upload pages, yet the situation was his damn fault anyway. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 13:11, 5 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> :* I think we should include that as missed comic days. It's not like he uploaded extra comics to make up for it. --[[User:Morganna|Morganna]] 13:47, 5 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> *I was thinking of maybe adding an asterisk next to the missing page count with note mentioning the outage time. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 19:30, 5 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ==what the fuck?==<br /> www.sonichu.com now redirects to some stupid shit about asperchu or something. isn't www.sonichu.com supposed to redirect to here?--[[User:Toughdog6789|Toughdog6789]] 19:24, 8 January 2010 (UTC) (forgot to sign when i originally posted, sorry)<br /> *Okay, two things. First of all, it's probably for the best. It'll help keep Chris from finding the site (if he hasn't already, that is, in the case that he has then at least he won't be able to find it anymore since the URL change) and also because Chris will be pissed if he finds out. He despises Asperchu, and the thought that it's growing bigger than Sonichu and is using him to garner popularity will probably make him tard rage. Second of all, sign your fucking posts. --[[User:ThatMan|ThatMan]] 01:53, 8 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> :*It really doesn't fucking matter if Chris finds CWCki or not, he probably doesn't give a shit and won't believe it. Second of all, everyone loves Asperchu, and Alec Benson Leary is doing to the Sonichu comics what Liquid did for Chris's videos. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:08, 8 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> ::*I thought the Sonichu.com redirect was fucking brilliant. Prove to Chris that Alec Benson Leary is better than him in every possible way.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:11, 8 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> :::Chris already knows about the CWCki. He blanked the front page once whining about it and was promptly banned. [[User:Evang|Evang]] 06:16, 8 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> ::::I thought that was a white knight.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:39, 8 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> :::::Wasn't chris. Chris probably looked at this and thought UGH TOO MANY WORDS and quit. but yeah asperchu is the next big thing. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 06:42, 8 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> ::::::That's the story I have heard. He said the proverbial TL;DR and left. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 06:59, 8 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> :::::::Actually Griffintwon, you're thinking of the story of when Chris found /cwc/. He couldn't even attempt to post the because there were "too many words" and the page's background hurt his eyes. --[[User:ThatMan|ThatMan]] 22:42, 8 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ==Okay==<br /> <br /> Why the fuck isn't the main page protected? [[User:ArizonaBay|ArizonaBay]] 05:48, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> *What the fuck was with the whole "Chris-chan is dead guiz, srsly" on the front page? [[User:NasuGrave|NasuGrave]] 21:50, 12 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> *1) because people, in theory, should be allowed to improve the main page, 2) we're getting pretty good at stopping vandalism in the race occurrences it happens. Also, to address NasuGrave, I imagine this is some faggot who thinks LULZ ROFLMAO in saying that Chris is dead and giving credit to his shitty troll persona no one gives a shit about. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:52, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> **[[User:Cchandlersonichu]] here you are champ. [[User:ArizonaBay|ArizonaBay]] 05:53, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> ***[[User:Gutcruncher]]. [[User:ArizonaBay|ArizonaBay]] 05:56, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> :::Gutcruncher looks safe, but we'll keep an eye all new accounts for a while. Good night and good luck, all --[[User:Dude|Dude]] 06:35, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> I just blocked a user called "Therealccwc" out of the CWCki. I guess our vandal is out in the cold. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 06:39, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> == Front page vandalized. ==<br /> <br /> Does this happen often? [[User:Fefnir|Fefnir]] 05:56, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> *No. This faggotry is a rare occurrence. Just bear with it. [[User:ArizonaBay|ArizonaBay]] 05:57, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> *Yeah, I thought so. Well, It's all fixed up anyways. [[User:Fefnir|Fefnir]] 06:02, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ===Page protection===<br /> <br /> I strongly avoid second guessing my fellow admins but I feel that Clyde may have reacted too strongly to the current vandalism. In theory, I think if someone wants to edit the front page, they should be allowed to do so, as people could genuinely have valid contributions. I'm protecting it for two weeks so the current vandals will probably get it's a bad idea to vandalize the CWCki by that time.<br><br /> I think that front page vandalism is a rare occurrence, the last time this happened was back in October and we've been fine since then so I personally disagree with permanently protecting the front page (after all, we're not CWCipedia :3). However, if people want to talk about permanently protecting the page, let's open the discussion and I will be glad to permanently protect the page if this truly reflects the needs and wishes of the CWCki community. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:21, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> *Huh, turns out I can block new users from editing pages. I'll consult Cogs to see what constitutes a "new" user because if that's the case, I think our best option would just to block new users from editing the main page which pretty much rules out vandals.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:43, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> **no you're stupid champ, no one has edited the front page to make it contain anything useful besides you [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 07:46, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> ::*NO U. Also, you did :p. And in theory, someone could make things look cooler in ways neither you nor I could. Anyways, since I know when to pick my battles, if you have an idea for the front page, post it on this talk page. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:49, 13 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ==Shirts==<br /> [[User:Kynes|Kynes]] has been doing some good work on Chris's [[Chris and Fashion|shirts]], and I noticed there is some white space (well, green space) on the main page, so here's a quick little shirt tracker if anybody's interested! --[[User:Dude|Dude]] 00:01, 16 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> {{Shirt of the Now<br /> |file= Christshirt4.png<br /> |name = Advice Dog<br /> |date = 12 [[January 2010]]<br /> |counter = three}}<br /> <br /> * Yes, please. It would be interesting (in a horrifying sense, of course) to know how long his shirts have been marinating in his bodily odors and fluids before he finally decides to change his clothes a week later.--[[User:Miss Noel|Noel Ari Paige]] 14:40, 25 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == Mailbag 41 ==<br /> <br /> It's up already, Chris is probably going to go fucking crazy since every single one is either criticizing him or praising Asperchu. I bet he deletes 3/4's of it. [[User:Sandworm|Sandworm]] 01:52, 16 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ==Hardlinks to Old CWCki==<br /> [http://www.cogsdev.org/w/index.php?title=Special:LinkSearch&target=http%3A%2F%2Fcogsdev.110mb.com%2Fcwcki%2F&namespace=0 Check it out]<br /> <br /> The only hardlinks left are ones that originate in '''Template:Christory''' pages for dates that haven't been added yet. If somebody wants to be a TRUE hero, they should start going through those templates for hardlink instances and fixing them. --[[User:Dude|Dude]] 02:18, 19 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == Spanish ==<br /> <br /> I wanna translate the pages to spanish .. how Where edit this...{{unsigned|hematofilo}}<br /> *For now, if you really want to translate pages to Spanish, I'd make subpages in the time being until we could work out a Spanish namespace. For instance, put your translation for [[Christian Weston Chandler]] to [[Christian Weston Chandler/Spanish]]. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:49, 28 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> *What. [[User:Artiph|Artiph the Destroyer, Omniscient Archmage, bearer of the Grimoire of Destruction, whose powers by and large surpass that of the Great Wizard CrassCrab, Lord of the Seven Realm and Master of the Archane Black Arts of the Eleventh Trans-Dimensional Vortex]] 17:12, 24 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ==Quote of the Now request==<br /> "How old do you think I am? [[Lie|I am not an immature child]]; I am 27 years old." From [[Mailbag 45]]. --[[User:Jewlay|Jewlay]] 01:15, 27 January 2010 (UTC)<br><br /> "I have already donated a healthy sum into the funds that have exceeded $57 million." Even better. Apparently he doesn't need his monthly tugboat after all! --[[User:JM1987|JM1987]] 21:21, 27 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> People, if it's a decent quote, you're welcome to update [[:Template:Quote of the now|the template]] yourself. If it sucks, I'll revert it, if not, I'll keep it. By the way JM, I think he's not saying he's donated $57 million, just that he's donated to a fund that has raised this much. Poor wording, yes, but not totally fail wording. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:27, 27 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> :*Thanks, didn't realize it was a template. --[[User:Jewlay|Jewlay]] 21:55, 27 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> :*And neither did I. Also, cheers Champthom, it really is bad wording, and I was doubting Chris-chan would make even ''that'' big a lie. --[[User:JM1987|JM1987]] 00:58, 29 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == Front page templates ==<br /> <br /> So this page isn't clogged up with "Hay, [x] should have [y]", here are links to front page templates:<br /> *[[Template:Picture of the now]]<br /> *[[Template:Video of the now]]<br /> *[[Template:Quote of the now]]<br /> <br /> Article of the now is protected, but feel free to suggest articles on the [[Template talk:Article of the now|talk page]].<br /> <br /> If your suggestion sucks, I'll revert it, if not, I'll keep it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:48, 28 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == Removing the outage thing ==<br /> <br /> If there's no outage by the end of the month, I'm going to delete the outage counter from the header. It's served us well but since we have a new server, I don't think outages will be a problem anymore. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:12, 28 January 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == Chris has discovered this Wiki ==<br /> <br /> Is that good or bad? --[[User:Ninjaclown|Ninjaclown]] 05:42, 10 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> *Depends. Do you like to be attacked in YouTube videos? If so, then it's a good thing. CWCki is just the latest in a long line of things Chris blames for his life other than himself. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 05:59, 11 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> :*This talk page should be used to discuss the improvement of the main page. Talk about CWCki goes in [[CWCki:Community Portal|here]]. I've started a discussion [[CWCki:Community_Portal#So_Chris_has_discovered_the_CWCki_.28finally.29|here]] to discuss this topic. <br /> <br /> ::It very well could start into a saga but good sagas are never planned. I plan on making a video to defend the honor of the CWCki and we'll see where it goes from there.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:52, 11 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == Countdown to TROUBLE? ==<br /> <br /> What do you all think of getting a timer on the front page that counts down to midnight EST tonight? And maybe after midnight passes, and we haven't all been eaten by the ghost of Patti, a timer that counts how overdue the TROUBLE is? (Or did he mean midnight of Thursday/Friday? Dammit, even his precision is imprecise!) --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 18:06, 12 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> *He just postponed it to the 31st, but I could put something like that in the CWCipedia Tracker. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 09:53, 14 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> In about 24 hours the deadline will be up. Chris will hopefully put up another "TAKE DOWN THAT SITE!" video, not like he can do much else. Of course we may want to keep tabs on the pages in question just in case Chris decides to edit them himself. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 03:39, 31 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> *I'm pretty sure the relevant articles are locked to editing. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 05:10, 31 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> :*I think the plan is to document and revert any edits Chris might make. He does have a major tendency to blab information when he doesn't mean to, and that plays right into our hands. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 05:14, 31 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> ::*I have to agree. Trouble? This is Tarditude delivered to our doorsteps! Besides, I have yet to see Chris's personal army attempting something against the CWCki. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 05:18, 31 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> *Main threat, IMHO, is white knights and other faggots who want to give into Chris's demands to get Chris's attention for various reasons, or just to troll us all. In any case, pages are locked.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:23, 31 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == Replace CWCipedia Tracker with PSTripple Tracker ==<br /> <br /> I think it would be more active than the CWCipedia tracker for sure... [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 15:36, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> * Heh. One way or the other, yeah, the CWCipedia tracker has just about outlived its usefulness. I dunno if "Chris got four more trophies in Heavy Rain today" is really main page-worthy, but there might be something that could occupy the space more effectively now. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 16:15, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> * We can go with that. At the same time, go ahead and keep the CWCipedia tracker around just in case he (*GASP*) ''decides to update!'' <sub>Pfft. Should turn it into an Asperchu tracker.</sub>--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 16:20, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> * Whatever he does after CWCipedia, we can convert it into that. Until then, a PS3 tracker is probably more useful... --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 18:04, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> * First, let's wait for confirmation that Chris dumping CWCipedia. There's a remote chance he'll actually come back. Until then, let's keep it around. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:58, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> * Yeah- he's actually fighting to revert. I'm impressed with him. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 18:59, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> *Are the changes to the CWCipedia saved somehow? A timeline could be made with those dates.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 20:03, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> **Looks like he's still updating it from time to time. Also, where can I find the PS3 tracker?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:19, 26 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> ***It was no surprise that his recent announcement that he was leaving the internet forever was a total lie. We all knew he wouldn't stay off the internet for long. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 04:13, 26 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == I just noticed... ==<br /> <br /> There are still a few items on the Cwcipedia main page that Chris hasn't removed/noticed. The "Did you know..." section under the Twitter feed reads things like:<br /> <br /> * ...that Christian Weston Chandler is still looking for a joy-boy?<br /> * ...that Rosechu is a shallow character who cheats on Sonichu with Magi-chan?<br /> * ...that Christian Weston Chandler likes it rough from men with hairy bums?<br /> * ...that Christian Weston Chandler drinks semen?<br /> <br /> How long does anyone think it'll take for him to notice that his own site is mocking him?<br /> <br /> -- [[Aldrasio]]<br /> <br /> :I don't know, Aldrasio. I just don't know. --[[User:Blunderscore|Blunderscore]] 01:04, 28 March 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == new chris vid ==<br /> <br /> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyUey1YLbb8&feature=player_embedded# I dunno how to ad it<br /> * I did it. It's all set up for someone to TRANSCRIBE DIS BITCH! --[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 23:04, 12 April 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> <br /> I just noticed that Chris changes the catogories on his youtube videos,selecting comedy for certain ones, to non profits & activism on others and so on. Should this be included in the CWCki video descriptions ? -- [[User:DamianAntaria|DamianAntaria]]<br /> <br /> == CWCipedia has a problem ==<br /> <br /> The site is experiencing technical difficulties. It seems like it's been like that all day. Is it worth adding to the tracker?<br /> <br /> --[[User:Aldrasio|Aldrasio]] 00:57, 29 April 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> :It's just 110 MB going down again. But sure, why not.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 01:07, 29 April 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == We're back. ==<br /> <br /> After a 2 day outage, the CWCki has returned. Enjoy. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000]] 00:05, 2 May 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> I dunno what you're talking about; I never had an issue accessing the site. Pics or didn't happen. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 00:06, 2 May 2010 (UTC)<br /> :Some people got their IPs blocked for unintended spamming requests. This message is for those people. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000]] 00:07, 2 May 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ==Daily comic update tally: number of days delivered?==<br /> <br /> Being that Chris promised to update every day and not just to produce like 365.25 or whatever pages a year, it might be interesting to tally up the number of days he actually delivered along with the number of days he missed. I don't have the authority to edit the front page, but as of today it's like 43. Out of 187. Which is like 23%. Which is [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:485-CWCsF.JPG an F]. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 16:51, 19 May 2010 (UTC)<br /> *Technically it's slightly better than that, as he stopped that policy in like February. I'm pretty sure he still would have failed on a normal grading scale, though. --[[User:ThatMan|ThatMan]] 23:37, 21 May 2010 (UTC)<br /> :*Right, that. I'm confused. There were only 103 days from 14 November 2009 to 24 February 2010 and as of this writing the tracker says that the count ended on 24/2/09 ''and'' that he's missed 146, but that number's consistent with a count continuing for the 189 days completed from 14/11/09 to today. Should that be redacted and finalized somehow? I mean, everyone knew he wasn't going to do what he said he'd do, but it's interesting to see the [[Fail|final statistics]]. All I did to calculate his percentage was subtract the stated days missed from the total number of days and then divide by the total number of days times 100%, but I guess I don't know what the number of days missed was on 24 February. If he consistently hasn't updated the comic for the 88 days since 24/2/10, I guess it would be 43 / 103 * 100% ≈ 42%, which is, I dunno, an F+ I guess. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 18:35, 22 May 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> ==Flipnote Hatena Tracker==<br /> <br /> Since almost every recent Chris update has been on Flipnote Hatena, I was thinking that perhaps we should create a template to be used exclusively to list his contributions to that site, much like the old CWCipedia tracker. --[[User:ThatMan|ThatMan]] 01:44, 28 June 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> :Agreed. Mostly because of his lulzy Comments--[[User:Djyellow|Djyellow]]<br /> *Sim salla bin! So shall it be written, so shall it be done [[:Template:Flipnote Studio Tracker|here]].--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:45, 29 June 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> So how long do we wait before taking this off the front page? It's not entirely unlikely that Chris will try to get back on the site.--[[User:Star Platinum|Star Platinum]] 16:33, 3 July 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> == New User, looking to help ==<br /> I have been following Chris for years, can't get enough of him. I was elated when I discovered this site and wanted to help any way that I can. Where would the help be most appreciated? --[[User:KidneyStone|KidneyStone]] 18:22, 15 July 2010 (UTC)<br /> :* I'd recommend that you hang around the IRC channel and talk with the other people there, make yourselves known. Talk to the higher ups, see if there's anything they need. I'd also recommend you do a little bit of transcription and edit articles, people notice that kinda stuff and it's sorely needed. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 11:33, 18 July 2010 (UTC)<br /> <br /> I cant imagine there is anyone else in the world who has had their life so vastly documented and anaylized. its quite amazing really --[[User:Bentduck|Bentduck]] 08:06, 7 August 2010 (PDT)<br /> <br /> == Sonichu in PCzone ==<br /> <br /> In the gaming magazine's "Fight Club" Section ( Page 116 ) you can see a screenshot of Counter strike players beside a Sonichu spray. Chris has infected Valve , Perhaps?<br /> <br /> Problem - No scanner. Can someone else get a picture? ( Has to be Britfag since pczone only sells there.)<br /> <br /> :Pics or it didn't happen. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 14:45, 23 August 2010 (PDT)<br /> <br /> == Feature request: PDF ala Wikipedia ==<br /> <br /> As I find this wiki to be an enjoyable read on the go, I'd love a PDF copy of select pages (or, well, all of them).<br /> <br /> There's a MediaWiki extention that can do this - you "collect" pages you'd like and you can turn them into a pretty nifty little PDF book suitable for printing (ie, through PediaPress). [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Help:Books/Frequently_Asked_Questions#Can_I_use_the_book_tool_with_my_MediaWiki_installation.3F]<br /> <br /> Any ideas/thoughts? [[User:Dragonfli|Dragonfli]] 17:52, 23 August 2010 (PDT)</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_Chris%27s_lies&diff=109620 List of Chris's lies 2010-08-18T01:12:01Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Chris's lies */</p> <hr /> <div>{{quote|I do not lie all the time; I lie some of the time.|[[Chris]], [[Kacey and Liquid Call]]}}<br /> <br /> <br /> [[Chris]], not being one to accept personal responsibility, will frequently '''lie''' to save face.<br /> <br /> In many cases, he will lie in a meager attempt to be "clever" or "outwit" the [[trolls]]. However, Chris is totally incapable of lying in a way that looks remotely convincing, so his lies have the opposite effect (e.g. going to Redmond). In other cases, he will lie to deny accepting personal responsibility for his actions (e.g. drawing a [[ShecameforCWC.jpg|rule 34]] of [[Megan]]).<br /> <br /> The reason why Chris is capable of telling bold-faced lies while still claiming to be [[Honest content|True and Honest]] probably derives from failing to understand the concept of a "white lie": a lie said out of courtesy to avoid offending people with the uncomfortable truth. Because telling this kind of lie usually is socially acceptable and won't tarnish one's reputation, Chris, in his usual blindness to social rules, probably learned through his [[autistic]] brain that it is OK to lie in order to save face, because it is possible to do so while still remaining Honest.<br /> <br /> This list serves to document all of Chris's blatant falsehoods. While Chris is known to speak half-truth, exaggerate, etc., the fact that he is willing to outright tell blatant lies and untruths with no grounds in reality is disturbing and this list serves to document the latter.<br /> <br /> ==Chris's lies==<br /> <br /> *Chris claims to be descended from [[Anne Boleyn]], which is impossible since her ultimate descendant is the '''virgin''' Queen Elizabeth.<br /> <br /> *In a Mumble chat, he lied and said that nude photos of him on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] were photoshopped, despite the fact that he consented to these photos.<ref>[[Mumble 2|Mumble Chat 2]], ~44 minute mark</ref> Chris also lied to someone he believed to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] about the ED images being photoshopped.<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#From Chris to Miyamoto]]</ref><br /> <br /> *For two days, Chris claimed to have a new [[sweetheart]] named [[Chloe]] after the [[Blanca]] breakup. The first mention was to his fans, of all people.<ref>[[Chris's Sonichu IRC Chloe Introduction]]</ref> Yet if he were already seeing Chloe, why was he sad about breaking up with Blanca? Chris claimed to have met Chloe IRL at [[GameStop]] where they struck up a conversation, yet Chris has constantly said he freezes even while practicing talking to women.<ref>[[Vivitheg's AIM chat]]</ref> The most damning evidence is Chris never mentioned Chloe again. Furthermore, as of [[Mailbag 13]], he denies that he ever said anything about a Chloe.<br /> <br /> *In the infamous [[IRC (21 January 2009)|Clyde-raped-Panda chat]], Chris states, "My heart is true and set, and I have made my promises. I am with [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] in mind and soul; I have promised to be her True Sweetheart...and I am not a man who goes back on his promises." Chris then proceeded to give her up to [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]] over a matter of days, and then quickly became involved with [[Julie]].<br /> <br /> *Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|lied]] about taking a trip to Redmond because he had no financial support and to get a "Peaceful Weekend Getaway from the Trolls of the internet."<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#From Chris to Miyamoto]]</ref><br /> <br /> *In his [[Chris dispels videogame rumors|13 September 2009]] video, he says he personally talked to Sega of America and was told Project Needlemouse (or as he calls it, Needlenose) was a new Sonic game, and not a Sonichu game. Ignoring Chris's track record for honest interaction with video game representatives, the truth of the game was not revealed until 4 February 2010 where it was revealed to be ''Sonic the Hedgehog 4''. The idea that Sega would tell a greasy virgin manchild who rips off their intellectual property what the game is and not anyone else is 100% bullshit.<br /> <br /> *Chris claimed that the [[DVD]] that trolls procured wasn't the "director's cut,"<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008]]</ref><ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009]]</ref> yet the DVD had all the features that had been described before trolls even came into contact with Chris. More so, when the alleged "director's cut" was shown on video, the DVD itself clearly had "Director's Cut" scribbled in with a Sharpie, suggesting that Chris crudely altered it in an attempt to back up his lie.<br /> <br /> *Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|claimed]] that [[Blanca]] received the [[medallion]] and sent it back so Chris could modify it, yet the Medallion with the "special marks" was destroyed on YouTube. Furthermore, in a private chat with [[Robert Simmons V]]{{cite}}, Chris admits that the medallion was procured and was hastily working on a new one to throw the trolls off guard. <br /> <br /> *When a nefarious IRL [[Jerkop]] confronted Chris on his [[Attraction Sign]], Chris quickly hid the sign while the Jerkop left to get the [[Manajerk]]. Then, Chris proceeded to lie and pretend he never brought the sign, resulting in him being banned from the store.<br /> <br /> *While Chris has certainly called the police on the occasional troll or two, Chris will [[CCWC's_Final_Warning_to_the_Second_CWC|warn trolls]] that he has unleashed the full fury of the FBI and/or [[CWC_-_Exposing_Jeff|police detectives]] on them. When he wants to be really intimidating, he'll say they are [[10142009|"his detectives"]] as if he is in direct command of them. However, people smarter than Chris (that is to say, all people) know that Chris is totally bluffing, as neither the FBI nor even small-town police detectives are going to waste their time and resources trying to track down someone who said mean things about Chris over the intertubes when there are no end of serious felonies in need of investigating. <br /> <br /> *Chris claimed that he was banned from [[The Game Place]] forever for going behind the counter. In fact, as revealed by [[Mimms]] on the PVCC forum, the ban for going behind the counter was temporary, and what got him banned forever was the fact that he got into a shouting match with a child and treated the [[Michael Snyder|store's manager]] rudely.<br /> <br /> *In an email,<ref>[[Chris E-mails 2008]] -- 'Against me, [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|that page]] has broken the closest thing I've had to a relationship with Megan Schroeder, who I've finally had at her first time of saying with feeling, "I Love You" to me, then she found that page and she broke up with me.'</ref> Chris claimed Megan said she loved him, when in reality she said no such thing.<br /> <br /> *After Chris pissed off Megan by posting [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] he proceeded to apologize to her [[Megan E-mails|via e-mail]], claiming he was [[Megan E-mails#Chris apologizes for something, what could it be?|"sorry for hurting [her]"]] and that he was [[Megan E-mails#Chris does not regret the Meganporn|"sorry for uploading the drawing"]], saying to her [[Megan E-mails#Chris does not regret the Meganporn|"I've learned from my mistakes"]]. He later proved he felt no remorse for the drawing by [[ShecameforCWC.JPG#Today|reuploading the picture]] for use in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], citing the need for "sexy pictures for a sexy website."<br /> <br /> *Chris claims that he is the descendant of [[Daniel Weston]], one of the pilgrims on board the Mayflower. This is obviously not true, because according to all known passenger lists, there was no man named Daniel Weston on the ship.<ref>[http://www.pilgrimhall.org/mayfpass.htm A list of all passengers on the Mayflower from a guy who was actually there]</ref><br /> <br /> *He has made occasional claims<ref>See [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009]] and [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 29th, 2009]]</ref> that he really doesn't hate [[homos]], despite several instances of him showing otherwise.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009]], [[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]], [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], [[It's UGH!]], [[CWC "Boyfriend"]], [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls]]</ref><br /> <br /> *In an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]]<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]] at 21:21</ref> with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]], Chris told Clyde, "People who call others homo are themselves in dire question of their own sexual preferences." When Clyde pointed out that Chris had called Clyde a homo just minutes earlier in the same chat, Chris lied that he didn't. When Chris was shown the exact words he typed, he said it didn't count because he was retaliating against Clyde's remark. <br /> <br /> *Impersonated [[CChanSonichuCWC]] and called [[Kacey]], telling her about his sexual fantasies (which involves [[recycling]]).<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref><br /> <br /> *Chris's challenges to CChanSonichuCWC began with a [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 29th, 2009|video]] in Spanish, stating that if Liquid Chris could not respond in Spanish, that would prove he is the impostor. When that [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYAAc9zAVQw backfired horribly], Chris then issued the [[SingStar Challenge]] to determine who is the real Chris. When Chris lost the SingStar Challenge, he declared that the contest meant nothing. <br /> <br /> *He claimed to have an [[Robotnik|IQ of over 300]].<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]] at 12:23</ref> For perspective, the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_vos_Savant woman with the highest IQ in the world] has an IQ of 230. Later on, he claimed to have an IQ of 150.<ref>[[Mailbag 19]]</ref><br /> <br /> *Chris has inserted clearly bullshit [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_1/Page_1 disclaimer pages] at the front of each issue of his comics where he claims:<br /> {{quote|Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu Comics]], except that of Christian Weston Chandler, [[Megan|that]] [[Clyde Cash|may]] [[CADD Chef|seem]] [[Kellie Andes|similar]] [[Hanna|to]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|anyone]] [[Bagget|in]] [[Sarah Hammer|real]] [[Wes Iseli|life]], are purely coincidental, or otherwise [[Parody|parodic]].|Chris's disclaimer as it appears in his comics.}}<br /> <br /> *Chris made a fake page<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20071108233910/http://members.aol.com/CWCSonichu/EPPromotions283.html</ref> mimicking [[PS3|playstation]].com that showed him as the winner of the [[PaRappa contest]].<br /> <br /> *Trying to sound like a tough guy, Chris claimed in a [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|15 October 2009]] Captain's Log entry that he "did not give a dang" about the reappearance of [[Liquid Chris]], which is obviously not true since Solid devoted the entire first half of the Captain's Log to discrediting Liquid. Solid also stated that it would be the last time he mentioned Liquid, so of course he mentioned him again in [[Brutal Legend Plus|a video six days later]]. In that video, Solid even used one of [[SingStar_Challenge_Round_1#CChanSonichuCWC.27s_Entry|Liquid's SingStar Challenge songs]] to mock the [[trolls]] (the song's original purpose being to mock Solid), proving that Liquid does indeed still agitate him.<br /> <br /> *In [[Mailbag 14]], Chris offered a revisionist account of his ejection from [[Grace Baptist Church]], claiming that he was banned from the congregation because his pastor "found images of women in bikinis on my Facebook; he was offended." In fact, as Chris himself revealed in an e-mail to [[Lordsillynipples]] in 2008, he was kicked out after his pastor discovered the catalog of Chris's sexually deviant behavior on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], as well as the deranged YouTube rant from his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|25th birthday]].<br /> <br /> *In [[Mailbag 25]] Chris revealed that he told [[Bob Chandler|his father]] that he had taken the videos of the [[14 Branchland Ct.|Chandler house]] off the internet. The videos are still available on YouTube.<br /> <br /> *Chris claims he can lift [[Mailbag 48#Chris recommends wearing girl clothes over guy clothes|"well over 100 pounds"]].<br /> <br /> *In order to substantiate his claim that [[Asperchu]] is a [[parody]] of himself, Chris would logically be forced to admit their many similarities. However, most of that would involve admitting that Chris is a delusional, self-centered prick. Chris instead opts to note the similarities in their physical appearance. To wit: Asperchu's [[Pedo-Glasses]], [[Rollin' and Trollin'|goatee]], and [[Chris and Fashion|striped shirts]]. However, when it comes to Asperchu's rotund figure and obvious man-boobs, Chris admits that he ''used to'' have "manboobs" and a "buddha belly". Obviously, those things should not be described in the [[obesity|past tense]].<br /> <br /> *Chris began receiving emails in [[January 2010]] pointing out to him that his drawings of the Raichu from which Rosechu spawned in [[Sonichu 0]] had a pointed tail instead of a blunted one, meaning the Raichu was male. As Chris is a 300-IQ-having detail-oriented Pokémon expert, and he drew this Raichu with a pointed tail several times, fans concluded that he must have intended this, and let Chris know they now understand Rosechu started out male, and may still be a trap or hermaphroditic. Panicked that he'd been cornered, but unable to just issue a simple [[retcon]] due to his [[Chris and his ego|crippling ego]], Chris instead made a 22 January post on his [[CWCipedia]] including a doctored picture of the Raichu with the tail now blunted and lied to his readers that it had always been drawn that way since the very beginning. Not only was it obviously photoshopped, but he's such a tremendous idiot that he didn't change the actual comic page showing the pointed tail in his own site's archives. (It should be noted that Chris devised Rosechu's back story before Pokémon introduced the concept of gender specific features; all Raichu were depicted with a pointed tail before 2006. While Chris could have simply made this point, he opted to instead lie to his TRUE and HONEST fans.)<br /> <br /> *In early [[February 2010]], Chris added a note to the [[CWCipedia]] page for [[Simonla Rosechu]] claiming that she is a completely original character, and not a sloppy knockoff of [[Evan]] George's character [[Fan:Simonchu|Simonchu]]. This was, of course, an obvious lie, contradicted by Chris's own e-mails and other statements about Simonla's creation. Later, in a [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 4|phone conversation]] with Alec Benson Leary, Chris acted surprised that anyone would be unwilling to accept this "retraction" of the truth, suggesting that he doesn't even comprehend why people might not believe his lies.<br /> <br /> *When [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 6|talking to Alec]], Chris claimed that the [[Basement Rosechus]] were not meant to imply that Alec raped them, only that he allegedly treated them like hamsters. If this were so, why is one of them wearing a bridal gown, and why is one clad in only her undergarments if he was just keeping them as non-sexual pets?<br /> <br /> *On Chris's [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 5|fifth phone call with Alec]], Chris very quickly found his own logic being used against him. To extricate himself from having to admit he was wrong, Chris instead set the phone down and very unconvincingly pretended to be his own [[Barbara Chandler|mother]], carrying on a small "conversation" with Chris asking him to clean up some [[Chandler cats|cat shit]]. Chris then came back to the phone to tell Alec his mom needed him to take care of the cat and that he had to hang up.<br /> <br /> *During the [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|the eighth conversation with Alec]], Chris claims Nintendo sent him a letter saying Chris had free reign to use Pikachu in his comic, but when Alec asked Chris to upload the letter, Chris said he "misplaced" it. Nintendo simply giving away rights to use one of the most popular characters from one of their biggest cash cows is absolutely ridiculous. Also during the call, Chris made it a point to state very confidently that he "regularly" plays every single one of the games he owns as a valid reason to not sell off any of his games to make some money. Chris owns [[List of Chris's games|roughly 600]] different video games, so unless Chris has figured out [[Time Void|a way to stop time]], it would be impossible for him to play all of those games regularly. Even if he played games for 10 hours a day, 30 minutes at a time for each game, he'd only be able to play each game once a month.<br /> <br /> *Chris went to great lengths to tell the fans that he would never show gore and violence in his comics. However, he breaks this statement by killing Evan in a very gory fashion in [[Sonichu 10]].<br /> <br /> *When the trolls started to demand more comics, Chris stated that he was never sure about making money with Sonichu, if that were true, he would never try to make a [[Sonichu Adventure|videogame]] about Sonichu, nor try to sell it to businesspeople.<br /> <br /> *Chris has repeatedly referred to [[The Wallflower]] as his "girlfriend", despite making a video [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|pleading for her to be with him]], and in fact complaining about her essentially putting him in the [[friend zone]].<br /> <br /> *Promised to [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|"remove [him]self from the internet"]], only to [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|return in less than 48 hours]]. <br /> <br /> *While trying to get himself back into the GAMe PLACe, he says to Michael Snyder he's a better person. This is after all the shit he's done in the last year and a half, while secretly recording Michael, and ends the meeting calling Michael a Jew like it's an insult despite previously claiming he had nothing against Jews.<br /> <br /> *Chris's [[Damien_Antaria_(CWCipedia_page)|CWCipedia article about the Wallflower]] contains some of the biggest flights of fantasy, blatant lies, exaggerations, half-truths and flat out delusions seen yet from Chris outside of the [[Father Call]]. Specifically, he claimed that he and the Wallflower had shared a kiss; since this would have been Chris' "real" first kiss (aside from "[[Chloe]]", a lie), it was considered important by obsessive CWCki editors to see if he remembers it later (the Wallflower CWCipedia page article was written on April the 19th). Naturally... [[Jackie e-mails_Part_2|leaked e-mails from Jackie]] show that by the 10th of April, ''nine days before making this highly suspicious claim'', [[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2#Jackie.27s_Questionaire_1|Chris had either momentarily forgotten that he had been kissed]], something that would have been a monumental occasion in his life, lied on his CWCipedia about being kissed, or lied to Jackie about ''not'' being kissed (though that is very unlikely). Either way, he still lied about the kiss, although it's ''possible'' he's basing his story on a gross exaggeration of the truth (the two sharing a drinking straw is the current troll favorite for this).<br /> <br /> *In [[Mailbag 49]], when asked about his opinion on a possible repeal of the 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' policy, allowing for open homosexuals to serve in the US military, Chris, in an extremely homophobic reply, said that he thought the policy should only be repealed so that "the [[Homos|homos]] can go die in explosions." In [[Mailbag 51|several]] [[Mailbag_53|later]] [[Mailbag 54|Mailbags]], when called out on this, rather than simply apologize for the remark, he either denied having made it in the first place, or he claimed that he had retracted it. Later, he would alter an email in [[Mailbag 51]] which contained the quoted remark to make it appear as though Chris was being pro-gay in the original email. As of writing, the original, homophobic reply in [[Mailbag 49]] remains unchanged and unretracted.<br /> <br /> {{quote|I'm starting to really kinda doubt this whole 'honesty' thing you keep talking about.|Matthew Devoria - [[Father Call]]}}<br /> <br /> ==Sauces==<br /> <references /><br /> <br /> [[Category:Chris-chan]]<br /> [[Category:Lists]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:KitchenSink3&diff=109617 User:KitchenSink3 2010-08-18T01:03:23Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div>I'm trying to help with the big artist commune project by doing random shit.</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User_talk:KitchenSink3&diff=109616 User talk:KitchenSink3 2010-08-18T01:02:39Z

<p>KitchenSink3: Created page with "..."</p> <hr /> <div>...</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_and_fashion&diff=109614 Chris and fashion 2010-08-18T00:56:34Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Wardrobe */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|thumb|Fashion passes. Style is forever.]]<br /> <br /> [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a somewhat peculiar taste in '''fashion'''. Although he is willing to [[Chris and money|spend thousands of dollars]] on [[video games]], [[toys]], and [[sex dolls]], Chris is very stingy when it comes to shopping for his clothes, which are exclusively purchased secondhand at thrift stores like Salvation Army and Goodwill. Therefore, the only clothes he owns are colorful collared shirts and undersized rugby shirts that have been marinating in his [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|bodily stench and fluids]] for the past decade. Since most of them are decorated with horizontal stripes, they only make him look [[Obesity|fatter]].<br /> <br /> [[Mailbag 42#The rugby shirt he wore for 3 days in a row isn't a favorite or anything|Mailbag 42]] revealed that at least one (the "Advice Dog" shirt) and possibly all of his shirts were purchased by his cruel, cruel [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] so people will notice the fact that he's [[Autism|"special"]] and [[Kick the Autistic|treat him with sympathy]]. Alternatively, it could be that the Chandlers just aren't exactly what you'd call "fashion savvy". Although his mother doesn't directly dress him anymore, Chris still chooses to wear these shirts, possibly out of a strong aversion to change, a common trait of [[autistic]] people.<br /> <br /> == Childhood ==<br /> [[Image:Ernie.jpg|thumb|Ernie also enjoys "The Classic".]]<br /> <br /> In his youth, Chris set the general tone for years to come with many striped polo and T-shirts and khaki pants. The only difference compared to today is that he sometimes even dared to wear single-colored shirts with his [[Sonic the Hedgehog|favorite game]] and [[television]] characters on them. The only article of clothing he owned until recently that didn't follow the "long-sleeved, colorful clown suit" theme is the [[Pokémon]] T-shirt that he has owned since he was 19. Being yellow, it does not look good on him.<br /> <br /> == Trademark clothing ==<br /> <br /> [[File:Chrischan5.jpg|thumb|left|Artist's vision of Chris's typical outfit, featuring the Horizontal Horror.]]<br /> <br /> Chris's typical outfit consists of:<br /> <br /> * His favorite shirt, a striped/weirdly patterned rugby shirt, which is so tight that it accentuates his voluptuous, masculine bosoms. This is the shirt that Chris almost invariably draws himself wearing in the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]]. <br /> * His [[Medallions of Fail|medallions]] (sporadically) / his [[High School Ring]]<br /> * A pair of [[Pedo-Glasses]] attached to the Glasses Chain of Fail.<br /> * Jeans or khaki slacks. Chris's jeans typically define his rear end to a disturbing level — he may be wearing women's jeans, or he may simply still wear pants his gut long ago outgrew.<br /> * [[Belt Buckle of Fail]]<br /> * Alternatively, a green terrycloth bathrobe with a mismatched (of course) black belt.<br /> * On occasion, a dark suit jacket, perhaps for the many [[Chris and death|funerals that plague his existence]].<br /> * Since late 2009, a [[sports bra]] to keep previously mentioned bosoms in check.<br /> <br /> The newest addition to his wardrobe is the [[Fridays After Five|I Enjoy Vagina shirt]].<br /> <br /> ==The "[[Ian Brandon Anderson|IBA]]" outfit==<br /> In mid-[[2009#June|June 2009]], roughly around the time he made friends, Chris temporarily decided that his current look was old hat. He got rid of many of the striped shirts (mostly because he couldn't fit into them anymore) and grew a terrible goatee. <br /> <br /> The reformed Chris's wardrobe consisted of:<br /> <br /> *Sunglasses over normal glasses (Glasses Chain of Fail remains)<br /> *T-shirt over long sleeved shirt.<br /> *Goatee.<br /> *Tattoo sleeves<br /> *A black vest that is too small for his girth.<br /> *[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]<br /> <br /> Unconfirmed reports state that he was seen walking around downtown [[Charlottesville]] blasting Guns 'n' Roses from a pocket radio and trying to pick up women.<br /> <br /> His new attire was first properly presented to the world in the [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video.<br /> <br /> Soon afterward, however, he went back to sporting his traditional clownshirts, and claimed that he was pressured into making the Rollin' and Trollin' video.<br /> <br /> ==The "Gay Trucker" outfit==<br /> [[Image:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Notice how his pose in this picture is eerily reminiscent of his pose in [[ShecameforCWC.jpg]].]]<br /> <br /> After he made a promise to leave the internet in the spring of 2010, Chris threw away his clown shirts, ditched the medallion, and picked up a new wardrobe in an attempt to look like a normal person. The result is a modified version of the IBA outfit. It has been observed that Chris tries to look like a bad boy, but he ends up looking like a [[gay]] trucker, hence the trolls' term for his new wardrobe.<br /> <br /> The only way he could make it look gayer is by combining it with his [[muscle bra]]. Which, unfortunately, he has. [[Fridays After Five|And in public.]] At this point, going back to the [[Sonichu Medallion]] would actually ''improve'' his chances of picking up girls.<br /> <br /> [[File:EnjoyVagaina.jpg|thumb|left|Deftly combining what Chris [[Coke|has too much of]] and what he [[China|will never have]].]]<br /> <br /> With the arrival of the gay trucker outfit also came an interest in T-shirts that boldly express Chris's desire for sex, often in exceedingly tasteless ways. The first clear look at one of these shirts was in a [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|profoundly disturbing video]] leaked in late [[April 2010]] which featured Chris wearing a [[parody]] shirt that read "[[homos|Mount and do me]]". That said, the video was made for a potential sweetheart that Chris desperately wanted to fuck, leaving open the possibility that Chris didn't intend to dress like that outside his [[Chris's room|bedroom]].<br /> <br /> Chris destroyed any hope of that being the case on 18 [[June 2010]] when he wore a shirt that said "Enjoy Vagina" to a public, family-oriented concert. He then topped himself later, by pulling that shirt over his head, and standing around in his muscle bra, which he had written "WANT WOMAN!" on. The common belief is that these tasteless, sexually themed shirts are the next evolution of the [[attraction sign]], a way for him to inform potential mates that he is both straight and available without ever having to talk to people.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> <br /> ==Theory of fashion==<br /> The clothes that Christian chooses seem almost like a costume for him, especially his infamous striped shirt. Given that he is [[autistic]], observers often speculate that he may have difficulty with identifying things visually, including himself. In [[Sonichu 7]], he alluded to having to take time to study his appearance in a mirror, possibly wearing the shirt in question. Either way, Christian seems to regard his shirt as an integral part of his identity in the same way that [[trolls]] do. <br /> <br /> His fashion sense has shown itself to be evolving in the last year, but moving in cycles. In [[2010]] he seemed to have ditched the Sonichu Medallion and moved into what could be described as a more edgy, hip, aggressive look. His success at being so is on par for course with the rest of his attempts at things.<br /> <br /> Of note, during his conversation with [[Kacey]] while posing as [[Liquid Chris]] he claimed to also own a striped shirt like the "impostor". He expressed much joy at the fact that it was red, white, and blue, implying a patriotic view of the colors.<br /> <br /> ==Wardrobe==<br /> Below is a gallery of most of Chris's wardrobe, along with links to the videos they appeared in:<br /> <center><br /> <gallery><br /> Image:1 - The Classic.png|"The Classic"<br>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_27th%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_18th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_19th%2C_2009|4]] [[CWC's_"It's_All_Coming_Back_To_Me"|5]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|6]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009|7]] [[SingStar_Challenge#Watch|8]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|9]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 4|10]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 22nd, 2009|11]] [[Show_RESPECT_to_me,_"C"CWC|12]] [[Sign_Destruction_Video|13]] [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|14]]<br /> Image:2 - Advice Dog.png|"The Advice Dog"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_24th%2C_2008|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_6th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_10th%2C_2009|4]] [[12_January_2010|5]] [[14_January_2010|6]] [[What's_the_Name,_Christian_Chandler,_C_H_R_I_S_C_H_A_N|7]] [[15 January 2010|8]] [[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L|9]]<br /> Image:3 - Impostor.png|"[[Liquid Chris|The Impostor]]"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_9th%2C_2008|1]] [[Chop_Chop_Onion's_Rap_Showdown|2]] [[Magical Man Potion|3]]<br /> Image:4 - Napoleon.png|"The Napoleon"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_17th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_4th%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_27th%2C_2009|3]] [[Challenge_for_Clyde_II|4]] [[15_October_2009|5]] [[9_December_2009|6]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|7]] [[22 January 2010|8]] [[I am Alive|9]]<br /> Image:5 - RacingStripe.png|"The Racing Stripe"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_10th%2C_2009|2]] [[Congrats,_Jack_Black|3]]<br /> Image:6 - PowerRanger.png| "The Power Ranger"<br>[[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_August_3rd%2C_2008|1]] [[CCWC's_Final_Warning_to_the_Second_CWC|2]] [[LOOK_at_the_truth!|3]]<br /> Image:7 - DunwichHorror.png| "The Dunwich Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[More_for_the_crabs|2]] [[ECV_00081|3]] [[Bunny_Hop|4]] [[11052009_Kacey,_I_Love_You,_and_I_Need_You|5]] [[CWC address to Royal Board|6]] [[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.|7]] [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|8]]<br /> Image:8 - TwoFace.png|"The Two-Face"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_23rd%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt11a.png|"The Poké-Master"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_August_6th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt12.png|"The Horizontal Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_8th%2C_2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt13a.png|"The Jerkop"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_13th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt14.png|"The Greasy Flag"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_6th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_9th%2C_2009|2]] [[I_am_devoted_to_My_Sweetest_Ivy|3]] [[Matthew_5_27%2C_CWC_Confessions|4]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_17th%2C_2009|5]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_22nd%2C_2009|6]] [[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts|7]] [[9_October_2009|8]] [[Warning_-_Naughty_Women_;)|9]] [[Old_Time_Rock_and_Roll_on_Shredwud|10]] [[Brutal_Legend|11]] [[3_December_2009|12]]<br /> Image:Christshirt18.png|"The Star Fleet Captain"<br>[[CWC More Than A Feeling|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt17.png|"The Scuderia Autistirarri"<br>[[Chris's Big Night Out|1]] [[10 September 2009|2]] <br /> Image:Christshirt19.png|"The Flag-Waving Patriot"<br>[[Chris_Destroys_His_Vibrator|1]] [[A CWC Audition|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|3]] [[CWC_only_accepts_IN-PERSON_FEMALE_Encounters|4]] [[Challenge for Clyde|5]] [[Brutal Legend Plus|6]] [[For_Chris#IBA.27s_video|7]] [[IPods_Down_and_Listen_Up|8]] [[Hello,_Juffalo|9]] [[9 February 2010|10]]<br /> Image:Christshirt20.png|"The Captain Falcon"<br>[[Down with Asperchu|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt21.png|"The DangerStripe"<br>[[This was my fault|1]] [[Address to my CWCipedia SysOP|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt22.png|"The Cyclone Joker"<br>[[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_January_21st,_2009|1]] [[CWC_Callout_for_Miss_Emily_and_Stephanie|2]] [[CHRIS!!!_CHANDLER!!!|3]] [[A message to the Trolls|4]] [[Don't Mess With Me|5]]<br /> Image:ChrisShirt43.png|"The Swamp Monster"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate December 20th, 2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt23.png|"The Traffic Light"<br>[[Chris_Chan's_Public_Announcement|1]] [[A_Sonichu_Day|2]] [[Shout_out_to_Fans_in_Hospital|3]] [[To Clyde and Jack.MOV|4]] [[Kill De Jack|5]]<br /> Image:ChristshirtPoke.png|"The Manchild"<br>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt28.png|"The Rugby of Shame"<br>[[Christian's Update 11 September 2008|1]]<br /> Image:Parappashirt.png|"The [[PaRappa_the_Rapper|PaRappa]] Shirt" <br> [[51_50|1]]<br /> Image:sportsbra.png|"The [[Muscle_bra|Muscle Bra]]"<br>[[04232010_-_Autism_Awareness_%26_Men_Should_NEVER_be_Topless|1]] <br /> Image:sportsbra2.png|"The Muscle Bra 2"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt27.png|"The Dirty Dashiki"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 8th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|2]] [[CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 4th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 26th, 2009|5]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|6]] [[Challenge for Clyde II|7]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|8]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|9]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|10]] [[I am Alive|11]]<br /> Image:Christshirt37.png|"The [[Homos|Mount and Do Me]]"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt25.png|"The [[Duck|Duckie]] Shirt"<br>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|1]] [[Secret Weapon|2]] [[YouTube Finale|3]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 5|4]]<br /> Image:Christshirt26.png|"The Shamrock Shake"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 28th, 2008|2]] [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt29.png|"The Shamrock Stripes"<br>[[Chris Sex Videos|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 7th, 2009|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 12th, 2009|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 13th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 20th, 2009|5]] [[Clyde Cash the kid video|6]] [[For Kacey II|7]] [[To Clyde Gregg|8]] [[For Chris II|9]] <br /> Image:Christshirt31.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt32.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare Redux"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009|1]] [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt33.png|"The Bumblebee"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt35.png|"The Intimidator"<br>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out|1]] [[I Love You Kacey|2]] [[10242009|3]] [[29 January 2010|4]] [[C-Ya Later|5]] [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|6]] <br /> Image:Christshirt38.png|"The Rainbow Flag"<br>[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt30.png|"The Big Green"<br>[[We're Being Watched|1]] [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt41.png|"The White Trash"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009|1]] [[War Paint Video|2]] [[Some Favored Comedians|3]] <br /> Image:Christshirt45.png|"The Happy Jack"<br>[[CWC Dare|1]] [[June062010.MOV|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt46.png|"The Bordeaux Butcher"<br>[[Apology to Emily|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt40.png|"The Ivory Poacher"<br>[[25 September 2009|1]]<br /> <br /> </gallery><br /> </center><br /> <br /> {{Illustrations}}<br /> <br /> == Wrist warmer ==<br /> <br /> [[Image:Wrist Warmer.jpg|thumb|Wrist warmer]]<br /> <br /> Ever wonder what that thing is behind Chris's neck?<br /> <br /> {{quote|Yes, it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there.|Chris<ref>Email from Chris posted in old [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]] thread 162</ref>}}<br /> <br /> Chris most likely wears it as a counter to [[Wikipedia:Sensory defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], a condition common among autistics, in which a normally harmless sensation directly triggers a fight-or-flight reaction.<br /> <br /> == Cosplaying ==<br /> [[Image:502-CWCsAshVest.JPG|thumb|Dat hat is a-pretty-a-goddamn dirty]]<br /> <br /> Chris appeared in his [[Pokémon|Ash Ketchum]] costume from around [[2000]] to [[2004]]. It was originally created as a Halloween costume in either [[1998]] or [[1999]].<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> He proudly wore it to [[The GAMe PLACe]] every week<ref>[[Mimms]] [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/pvcc/viewtopic.php?p=17515#p17515 post] on [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]]</ref> and to the 2004 [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] convention. With it, he won a costume contest against 5 kids dressed up as Team Rocket. The prize was a t-shirt.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> <br /> <br /> For a while, Chris resurrected this look for his profile picture on [[The Hook Cafe]] and eventually evolved into the Gay Trucker.<br /> <br /> The Ketchum-style trainer outfit consists of: <br /> * Faux-denim vest<br /> * Cut up gardening gloves <br /> * Pokémon League ballcap <br /> * Fanny-pack (Also known as a 'belly-bag' and a 'bum-bag' to Britfags) <br /> The ensemble is usually accompanied by a yellow ''[[Pokémon]]'' tee-shirt, or white ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic Heroes]]'' tee-shirt underneath (see gallery below).<br /> <br /> Chris can no longer wear this costume due to his [[obesity|obscene girth]].<br /> <br /> <center><gallery><br /> Image:0501-CWCAsh2.jpg<br /> Image:0502-CWCAsh3.jpg|HOT ROD 138, I c-ch-choose you~!<br /> Image:0503-CWCAsh4.jpg<br /> Image:0647-CWCAshAnime.jpg|This is the most depressing thing ever seen by man kind.<br /> Image:Chris chan cosplay.jpg|You can tell this world is totally fucked-up when people start cosplaying ''as'' Chris<br /> Image:Chris-Chan_Cosplay.jpg|Well, it's certainly scarier than any Halloween costume you'll see on any other kid.<br /> </gallery></center><br /> <br /> ==Sauce==<br /> <references /><br /> <br /> {{Chris and}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Chris-chan]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:8_-_TwoFace.png&diff=109613 File:8 - TwoFace.png 2010-08-18T00:54:55Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_and_fashion&diff=109611 Chris and fashion 2010-08-18T00:50:20Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Wardrobe */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|thumb|Fashion passes. Style is forever.]]<br /> <br /> [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a somewhat peculiar taste in '''fashion'''. Although he is willing to [[Chris and money|spend thousands of dollars]] on [[video games]], [[toys]], and [[sex dolls]], Chris is very stingy when it comes to shopping for his clothes, which are exclusively purchased secondhand at thrift stores like Salvation Army and Goodwill. Therefore, the only clothes he owns are colorful collared shirts and undersized rugby shirts that have been marinating in his [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|bodily stench and fluids]] for the past decade. Since most of them are decorated with horizontal stripes, they only make him look [[Obesity|fatter]].<br /> <br /> [[Mailbag 42#The rugby shirt he wore for 3 days in a row isn't a favorite or anything|Mailbag 42]] revealed that at least one (the "Advice Dog" shirt) and possibly all of his shirts were purchased by his cruel, cruel [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] so people will notice the fact that he's [[Autism|"special"]] and [[Kick the Autistic|treat him with sympathy]]. Alternatively, it could be that the Chandlers just aren't exactly what you'd call "fashion savvy". Although his mother doesn't directly dress him anymore, Chris still chooses to wear these shirts, possibly out of a strong aversion to change, a common trait of [[autistic]] people.<br /> <br /> == Childhood ==<br /> [[Image:Ernie.jpg|thumb|Ernie also enjoys "The Classic".]]<br /> <br /> In his youth, Chris set the general tone for years to come with many striped polo and T-shirts and khaki pants. The only difference compared to today is that he sometimes even dared to wear single-colored shirts with his [[Sonic the Hedgehog|favorite game]] and [[television]] characters on them. The only article of clothing he owned until recently that didn't follow the "long-sleeved, colorful clown suit" theme is the [[Pokémon]] T-shirt that he has owned since he was 19. Being yellow, it does not look good on him.<br /> <br /> == Trademark clothing ==<br /> <br /> [[File:Chrischan5.jpg|thumb|left|Artist's vision of Chris's typical outfit, featuring the Horizontal Horror.]]<br /> <br /> Chris's typical outfit consists of:<br /> <br /> * His favorite shirt, a striped/weirdly patterned rugby shirt, which is so tight that it accentuates his voluptuous, masculine bosoms. This is the shirt that Chris almost invariably draws himself wearing in the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]]. <br /> * His [[Medallions of Fail|medallions]] (sporadically) / his [[High School Ring]]<br /> * A pair of [[Pedo-Glasses]] attached to the Glasses Chain of Fail.<br /> * Jeans or khaki slacks. Chris's jeans typically define his rear end to a disturbing level — he may be wearing women's jeans, or he may simply still wear pants his gut long ago outgrew.<br /> * [[Belt Buckle of Fail]]<br /> * Alternatively, a green terrycloth bathrobe with a mismatched (of course) black belt.<br /> * On occasion, a dark suit jacket, perhaps for the many [[Chris and death|funerals that plague his existence]].<br /> * Since late 2009, a [[sports bra]] to keep previously mentioned bosoms in check.<br /> <br /> The newest addition to his wardrobe is the [[Fridays After Five|I Enjoy Vagina shirt]].<br /> <br /> ==The "[[Ian Brandon Anderson|IBA]]" outfit==<br /> In mid-[[2009#June|June 2009]], roughly around the time he made friends, Chris temporarily decided that his current look was old hat. He got rid of many of the striped shirts (mostly because he couldn't fit into them anymore) and grew a terrible goatee. <br /> <br /> The reformed Chris's wardrobe consisted of:<br /> <br /> *Sunglasses over normal glasses (Glasses Chain of Fail remains)<br /> *T-shirt over long sleeved shirt.<br /> *Goatee.<br /> *Tattoo sleeves<br /> *A black vest that is too small for his girth.<br /> *[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]<br /> <br /> Unconfirmed reports state that he was seen walking around downtown [[Charlottesville]] blasting Guns 'n' Roses from a pocket radio and trying to pick up women.<br /> <br /> His new attire was first properly presented to the world in the [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video.<br /> <br /> Soon afterward, however, he went back to sporting his traditional clownshirts, and claimed that he was pressured into making the Rollin' and Trollin' video.<br /> <br /> ==The "Gay Trucker" outfit==<br /> [[Image:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Notice how his pose in this picture is eerily reminiscent of his pose in [[ShecameforCWC.jpg]].]]<br /> <br /> After he made a promise to leave the internet in the spring of 2010, Chris threw away his clown shirts, ditched the medallion, and picked up a new wardrobe in an attempt to look like a normal person. The result is a modified version of the IBA outfit. It has been observed that Chris tries to look like a bad boy, but he ends up looking like a [[gay]] trucker, hence the trolls' term for his new wardrobe.<br /> <br /> The only way he could make it look gayer is by combining it with his [[muscle bra]]. Which, unfortunately, he has. [[Fridays After Five|And in public.]] At this point, going back to the [[Sonichu Medallion]] would actually ''improve'' his chances of picking up girls.<br /> <br /> [[File:EnjoyVagaina.jpg|thumb|left|Deftly combining what Chris [[Coke|has too much of]] and what he [[China|will never have]].]]<br /> <br /> With the arrival of the gay trucker outfit also came an interest in T-shirts that boldly express Chris's desire for sex, often in exceedingly tasteless ways. The first clear look at one of these shirts was in a [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|profoundly disturbing video]] leaked in late [[April 2010]] which featured Chris wearing a [[parody]] shirt that read "[[homos|Mount and do me]]". That said, the video was made for a potential sweetheart that Chris desperately wanted to fuck, leaving open the possibility that Chris didn't intend to dress like that outside his [[Chris's room|bedroom]].<br /> <br /> Chris destroyed any hope of that being the case on 18 [[June 2010]] when he wore a shirt that said "Enjoy Vagina" to a public, family-oriented concert. He then topped himself later, by pulling that shirt over his head, and standing around in his muscle bra, which he had written "WANT WOMAN!" on. The common belief is that these tasteless, sexually themed shirts are the next evolution of the [[attraction sign]], a way for him to inform potential mates that he is both straight and available without ever having to talk to people.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> <br /> ==Theory of fashion==<br /> The clothes that Christian chooses seem almost like a costume for him, especially his infamous striped shirt. Given that he is [[autistic]], observers often speculate that he may have difficulty with identifying things visually, including himself. In [[Sonichu 7]], he alluded to having to take time to study his appearance in a mirror, possibly wearing the shirt in question. Either way, Christian seems to regard his shirt as an integral part of his identity in the same way that [[trolls]] do. <br /> <br /> His fashion sense has shown itself to be evolving in the last year, but moving in cycles. In [[2010]] he seemed to have ditched the Sonichu Medallion and moved into what could be described as a more edgy, hip, aggressive look. His success at being so is on par for course with the rest of his attempts at things.<br /> <br /> Of note, during his conversation with [[Kacey]] while posing as [[Liquid Chris]] he claimed to also own a striped shirt like the "impostor". He expressed much joy at the fact that it was red, white, and blue, implying a patriotic view of the colors.<br /> <br /> ==Wardrobe==<br /> Below is a gallery of most of Chris's wardrobe, along with links to the videos they appeared in:<br /> <center><br /> <gallery><br /> Image:1 - The Classic.png|"The Classic"<br>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_27th%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_18th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_19th%2C_2009|4]] [[CWC's_"It's_All_Coming_Back_To_Me"|5]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|6]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009|7]] [[SingStar_Challenge#Watch|8]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|9]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 4|10]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 22nd, 2009|11]] [[Show_RESPECT_to_me,_"C"CWC|12]] [[Sign_Destruction_Video|13]] [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|14]]<br /> Image:2 - Advice Dog.png|"The Advice Dog"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_24th%2C_2008|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_6th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_10th%2C_2009|4]] [[12_January_2010|5]] [[14_January_2010|6]] [[What's_the_Name,_Christian_Chandler,_C_H_R_I_S_C_H_A_N|7]] [[15 January 2010|8]] [[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L|9]]<br /> Image:3 - Impostor.png|"[[Liquid Chris|The Impostor]]"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_9th%2C_2008|1]] [[Chop_Chop_Onion's_Rap_Showdown|2]] [[Magical Man Potion|3]]<br /> Image:4 - Napoleon.png|"The Napoleon"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_17th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_4th%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_27th%2C_2009|3]] [[Challenge_for_Clyde_II|4]] [[15_October_2009|5]] [[9_December_2009|6]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|7]] [[22 January 2010|8]] [[I am Alive|9]]<br /> Image:5 - RacingStripe.png|"The Racing Stripe"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_10th%2C_2009|2]] [[Congrats,_Jack_Black|3]]<br /> Image:6 - PowerRanger.png| "The Power Ranger"<br>[[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_August_3rd%2C_2008|1]] [[CCWC's_Final_Warning_to_the_Second_CWC|2]] [[LOOK_at_the_truth!|3]]<br /> Image:7 - DunwichHorror.png| "The Dunwich Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[More_for_the_crabs|2]] [[ECV_00081|3]] [[Bunny_Hop|4]] [[11052009_Kacey,_I_Love_You,_and_I_Need_You|5]] [[CWC address to Royal Board|6]] [[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.|7]] [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|8]]<br /> Image:Christshirt10.png|"The Two-Face"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_23rd%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt11a.png|"The Poké-Master"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_August_6th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt12.png|"The Horizontal Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_8th%2C_2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt13a.png|"The Jerkop"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_13th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt14.png|"The Greasy Flag"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_6th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_9th%2C_2009|2]] [[I_am_devoted_to_My_Sweetest_Ivy|3]] [[Matthew_5_27%2C_CWC_Confessions|4]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_17th%2C_2009|5]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_22nd%2C_2009|6]] [[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts|7]] [[9_October_2009|8]] [[Warning_-_Naughty_Women_;)|9]] [[Old_Time_Rock_and_Roll_on_Shredwud|10]] [[Brutal_Legend|11]] [[3_December_2009|12]]<br /> Image:Christshirt18.png|"The Star Fleet Captain"<br>[[CWC More Than A Feeling|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt17.png|"The Scuderia Autistirarri"<br>[[Chris's Big Night Out|1]] [[10 September 2009|2]] <br /> Image:Christshirt19.png|"The Flag-Waving Patriot"<br>[[Chris_Destroys_His_Vibrator|1]] [[A CWC Audition|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|3]] [[CWC_only_accepts_IN-PERSON_FEMALE_Encounters|4]] [[Challenge for Clyde|5]] [[Brutal Legend Plus|6]] [[For_Chris#IBA.27s_video|7]] [[IPods_Down_and_Listen_Up|8]] [[Hello,_Juffalo|9]] [[9 February 2010|10]]<br /> Image:Christshirt20.png|"The Captain Falcon"<br>[[Down with Asperchu|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt21.png|"The DangerStripe"<br>[[This was my fault|1]] [[Address to my CWCipedia SysOP|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt22.png|"The Cyclone Joker"<br>[[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_January_21st,_2009|1]] [[CWC_Callout_for_Miss_Emily_and_Stephanie|2]] [[CHRIS!!!_CHANDLER!!!|3]] [[A message to the Trolls|4]] [[Don't Mess With Me|5]]<br /> Image:ChrisShirt43.png|"The Swamp Monster"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate December 20th, 2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt23.png|"The Traffic Light"<br>[[Chris_Chan's_Public_Announcement|1]] [[A_Sonichu_Day|2]] [[Shout_out_to_Fans_in_Hospital|3]] [[To Clyde and Jack.MOV|4]] [[Kill De Jack|5]]<br /> Image:ChristshirtPoke.png|"The Manchild"<br>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt28.png|"The Rugby of Shame"<br>[[Christian's Update 11 September 2008|1]]<br /> Image:Parappashirt.png|"The [[PaRappa_the_Rapper|PaRappa]] Shirt" <br> [[51_50|1]]<br /> Image:sportsbra.png|"The [[Muscle_bra|Muscle Bra]]"<br>[[04232010_-_Autism_Awareness_%26_Men_Should_NEVER_be_Topless|1]] <br /> Image:sportsbra2.png|"The Muscle Bra 2"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt27.png|"The Dirty Dashiki"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 8th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|2]] [[CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 4th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 26th, 2009|5]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|6]] [[Challenge for Clyde II|7]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|8]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|9]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|10]] [[I am Alive|11]]<br /> Image:Christshirt37.png|"The [[Homos|Mount and Do Me]]"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt25.png|"The [[Duck|Duckie]] Shirt"<br>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|1]] [[Secret Weapon|2]] [[YouTube Finale|3]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 5|4]]<br /> Image:Christshirt26.png|"The Shamrock Shake"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 28th, 2008|2]] [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt29.png|"The Shamrock Stripes"<br>[[Chris Sex Videos|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 7th, 2009|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 12th, 2009|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 13th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 20th, 2009|5]] [[Clyde Cash the kid video|6]] [[For Kacey II|7]] [[To Clyde Gregg|8]] [[For Chris II|9]] <br /> Image:Christshirt31.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt32.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare Redux"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009|1]] [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt33.png|"The Bumblebee"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt35.png|"The Intimidator"<br>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out|1]] [[I Love You Kacey|2]] [[10242009|3]] [[29 January 2010|4]] [[C-Ya Later|5]] [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|6]] <br /> Image:Christshirt38.png|"The Rainbow Flag"<br>[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt30.png|"The Big Green"<br>[[We're Being Watched|1]] [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt41.png|"The White Trash"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009|1]] [[War Paint Video|2]] [[Some Favored Comedians|3]] <br /> Image:Christshirt45.png|"The Happy Jack"<br>[[CWC Dare|1]] [[June062010.MOV|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt46.png|"The Bordeaux Butcher"<br>[[Apology to Emily|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt40.png|"The Ivory Poacher"<br>[[25 September 2009|1]]<br /> <br /> </gallery><br /> </center><br /> <br /> {{Illustrations}}<br /> <br /> == Wrist warmer ==<br /> <br /> [[Image:Wrist Warmer.jpg|thumb|Wrist warmer]]<br /> <br /> Ever wonder what that thing is behind Chris's neck?<br /> <br /> {{quote|Yes, it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there.|Chris<ref>Email from Chris posted in old [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]] thread 162</ref>}}<br /> <br /> Chris most likely wears it as a counter to [[Wikipedia:Sensory defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], a condition common among autistics, in which a normally harmless sensation directly triggers a fight-or-flight reaction.<br /> <br /> == Cosplaying ==<br /> [[Image:502-CWCsAshVest.JPG|thumb|Dat hat is a-pretty-a-goddamn dirty]]<br /> <br /> Chris appeared in his [[Pokémon|Ash Ketchum]] costume from around [[2000]] to [[2004]]. It was originally created as a Halloween costume in either [[1998]] or [[1999]].<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> He proudly wore it to [[The GAMe PLACe]] every week<ref>[[Mimms]] [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/pvcc/viewtopic.php?p=17515#p17515 post] on [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]]</ref> and to the 2004 [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] convention. With it, he won a costume contest against 5 kids dressed up as Team Rocket. The prize was a t-shirt.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> <br /> <br /> For a while, Chris resurrected this look for his profile picture on [[The Hook Cafe]] and eventually evolved into the Gay Trucker.<br /> <br /> The Ketchum-style trainer outfit consists of: <br /> * Faux-denim vest<br /> * Cut up gardening gloves <br /> * Pokémon League ballcap <br /> * Fanny-pack (Also known as a 'belly-bag' and a 'bum-bag' to Britfags) <br /> The ensemble is usually accompanied by a yellow ''[[Pokémon]]'' tee-shirt, or white ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic Heroes]]'' tee-shirt underneath (see gallery below).<br /> <br /> Chris can no longer wear this costume due to his [[obesity|obscene girth]].<br /> <br /> <center><gallery><br /> Image:0501-CWCAsh2.jpg<br /> Image:0502-CWCAsh3.jpg|HOT ROD 138, I c-ch-choose you~!<br /> Image:0503-CWCAsh4.jpg<br /> Image:0647-CWCAshAnime.jpg|This is the most depressing thing ever seen by man kind.<br /> Image:Chris chan cosplay.jpg|You can tell this world is totally fucked-up when people start cosplaying ''as'' Chris<br /> Image:Chris-Chan_Cosplay.jpg|Well, it's certainly scarier than any Halloween costume you'll see on any other kid.<br /> </gallery></center><br /> <br /> ==Sauce==<br /> <references /><br /> <br /> {{Chris and}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Chris-chan]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:7_-_DunwichHorror.png&diff=109610 File:7 - DunwichHorror.png 2010-08-18T00:49:23Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_and_fashion&diff=109603 Chris and fashion 2010-08-18T00:37:22Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Wardrobe */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|thumb|Fashion passes. Style is forever.]]<br /> <br /> [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a somewhat peculiar taste in '''fashion'''. Although he is willing to [[Chris and money|spend thousands of dollars]] on [[video games]], [[toys]], and [[sex dolls]], Chris is very stingy when it comes to shopping for his clothes, which are exclusively purchased secondhand at thrift stores like Salvation Army and Goodwill. Therefore, the only clothes he owns are colorful collared shirts and undersized rugby shirts that have been marinating in his [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|bodily stench and fluids]] for the past decade. Since most of them are decorated with horizontal stripes, they only make him look [[Obesity|fatter]].<br /> <br /> [[Mailbag 42#The rugby shirt he wore for 3 days in a row isn't a favorite or anything|Mailbag 42]] revealed that at least one (the "Advice Dog" shirt) and possibly all of his shirts were purchased by his cruel, cruel [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] so people will notice the fact that he's [[Autism|"special"]] and [[Kick the Autistic|treat him with sympathy]]. Alternatively, it could be that the Chandlers just aren't exactly what you'd call "fashion savvy". Although his mother doesn't directly dress him anymore, Chris still chooses to wear these shirts, possibly out of a strong aversion to change, a common trait of [[autistic]] people.<br /> <br /> == Childhood ==<br /> [[Image:Ernie.jpg|thumb|Ernie also enjoys "The Classic".]]<br /> <br /> In his youth, Chris set the general tone for years to come with many striped polo and T-shirts and khaki pants. The only difference compared to today is that he sometimes even dared to wear single-colored shirts with his [[Sonic the Hedgehog|favorite game]] and [[television]] characters on them. The only article of clothing he owned until recently that didn't follow the "long-sleeved, colorful clown suit" theme is the [[Pokémon]] T-shirt that he has owned since he was 19. Being yellow, it does not look good on him.<br /> <br /> == Trademark clothing ==<br /> <br /> [[File:Chrischan5.jpg|thumb|left|Artist's vision of Chris's typical outfit, featuring the Horizontal Horror.]]<br /> <br /> Chris's typical outfit consists of:<br /> <br /> * His favorite shirt, a striped/weirdly patterned rugby shirt, which is so tight that it accentuates his voluptuous, masculine bosoms. This is the shirt that Chris almost invariably draws himself wearing in the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]]. <br /> * His [[Medallions of Fail|medallions]] (sporadically) / his [[High School Ring]]<br /> * A pair of [[Pedo-Glasses]] attached to the Glasses Chain of Fail.<br /> * Jeans or khaki slacks. Chris's jeans typically define his rear end to a disturbing level — he may be wearing women's jeans, or he may simply still wear pants his gut long ago outgrew.<br /> * [[Belt Buckle of Fail]]<br /> * Alternatively, a green terrycloth bathrobe with a mismatched (of course) black belt.<br /> * On occasion, a dark suit jacket, perhaps for the many [[Chris and death|funerals that plague his existence]].<br /> * Since late 2009, a [[sports bra]] to keep previously mentioned bosoms in check.<br /> <br /> The newest addition to his wardrobe is the [[Fridays After Five|I Enjoy Vagina shirt]].<br /> <br /> ==The "[[Ian Brandon Anderson|IBA]]" outfit==<br /> In mid-[[2009#June|June 2009]], roughly around the time he made friends, Chris temporarily decided that his current look was old hat. He got rid of many of the striped shirts (mostly because he couldn't fit into them anymore) and grew a terrible goatee. <br /> <br /> The reformed Chris's wardrobe consisted of:<br /> <br /> *Sunglasses over normal glasses (Glasses Chain of Fail remains)<br /> *T-shirt over long sleeved shirt.<br /> *Goatee.<br /> *Tattoo sleeves<br /> *A black vest that is too small for his girth.<br /> *[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]<br /> <br /> Unconfirmed reports state that he was seen walking around downtown [[Charlottesville]] blasting Guns 'n' Roses from a pocket radio and trying to pick up women.<br /> <br /> His new attire was first properly presented to the world in the [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video.<br /> <br /> Soon afterward, however, he went back to sporting his traditional clownshirts, and claimed that he was pressured into making the Rollin' and Trollin' video.<br /> <br /> ==The "Gay Trucker" outfit==<br /> [[Image:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Notice how his pose in this picture is eerily reminiscent of his pose in [[ShecameforCWC.jpg]].]]<br /> <br /> After he made a promise to leave the internet in the spring of 2010, Chris threw away his clown shirts, ditched the medallion, and picked up a new wardrobe in an attempt to look like a normal person. The result is a modified version of the IBA outfit. It has been observed that Chris tries to look like a bad boy, but he ends up looking like a [[gay]] trucker, hence the trolls' term for his new wardrobe.<br /> <br /> The only way he could make it look gayer is by combining it with his [[muscle bra]]. Which, unfortunately, he has. [[Fridays After Five|And in public.]] At this point, going back to the [[Sonichu Medallion]] would actually ''improve'' his chances of picking up girls.<br /> <br /> [[File:EnjoyVagaina.jpg|thumb|left|Deftly combining what Chris [[Coke|has too much of]] and what he [[China|will never have]].]]<br /> <br /> With the arrival of the gay trucker outfit also came an interest in T-shirts that boldly express Chris's desire for sex, often in exceedingly tasteless ways. The first clear look at one of these shirts was in a [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|profoundly disturbing video]] leaked in late [[April 2010]] which featured Chris wearing a [[parody]] shirt that read "[[homos|Mount and do me]]". That said, the video was made for a potential sweetheart that Chris desperately wanted to fuck, leaving open the possibility that Chris didn't intend to dress like that outside his [[Chris's room|bedroom]].<br /> <br /> Chris destroyed any hope of that being the case on 18 [[June 2010]] when he wore a shirt that said "Enjoy Vagina" to a public, family-oriented concert. He then topped himself later, by pulling that shirt over his head, and standing around in his muscle bra, which he had written "WANT WOMAN!" on. The common belief is that these tasteless, sexually themed shirts are the next evolution of the [[attraction sign]], a way for him to inform potential mates that he is both straight and available without ever having to talk to people.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> <br /> ==Theory of fashion==<br /> The clothes that Christian chooses seem almost like a costume for him, especially his infamous striped shirt. Given that he is [[autistic]], observers often speculate that he may have difficulty with identifying things visually, including himself. In [[Sonichu 7]], he alluded to having to take time to study his appearance in a mirror, possibly wearing the shirt in question. Either way, Christian seems to regard his shirt as an integral part of his identity in the same way that [[trolls]] do. <br /> <br /> His fashion sense has shown itself to be evolving in the last year, but moving in cycles. In [[2010]] he seemed to have ditched the Sonichu Medallion and moved into what could be described as a more edgy, hip, aggressive look. His success at being so is on par for course with the rest of his attempts at things.<br /> <br /> Of note, during his conversation with [[Kacey]] while posing as [[Liquid Chris]] he claimed to also own a striped shirt like the "impostor". He expressed much joy at the fact that it was red, white, and blue, implying a patriotic view of the colors.<br /> <br /> ==Wardrobe==<br /> Below is a gallery of most of Chris's wardrobe, along with links to the videos they appeared in:<br /> <center><br /> <gallery><br /> Image:1 - The Classic.png|"The Classic"<br>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_27th%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_18th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_19th%2C_2009|4]] [[CWC's_"It's_All_Coming_Back_To_Me"|5]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|6]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009|7]] [[SingStar_Challenge#Watch|8]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|9]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 4|10]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 22nd, 2009|11]] [[Show_RESPECT_to_me,_"C"CWC|12]] [[Sign_Destruction_Video|13]] [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|14]]<br /> Image:2 - Advice Dog.png|"The Advice Dog"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_24th%2C_2008|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_6th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_10th%2C_2009|4]] [[12_January_2010|5]] [[14_January_2010|6]] [[What's_the_Name,_Christian_Chandler,_C_H_R_I_S_C_H_A_N|7]] [[15 January 2010|8]] [[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L|9]]<br /> Image:3 - Impostor.png|"[[Liquid Chris|The Impostor]]"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_9th%2C_2008|1]] [[Chop_Chop_Onion's_Rap_Showdown|2]] [[Magical Man Potion|3]]<br /> Image:4 - Napoleon.png|"The Napoleon"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_17th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_4th%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_27th%2C_2009|3]] [[Challenge_for_Clyde_II|4]] [[15_October_2009|5]] [[9_December_2009|6]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|7]] [[22 January 2010|8]] [[I am Alive|9]]<br /> Image:5 - RacingStripe.png|"The Racing Stripe"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_10th%2C_2009|2]] [[Congrats,_Jack_Black|3]]<br /> Image:6 - PowerRanger.png| "The Power Ranger"<br>[[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_August_3rd%2C_2008|1]] [[CCWC's_Final_Warning_to_the_Second_CWC|2]] [[LOOK_at_the_truth!|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt8.png| "The Dunwich Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[More_for_the_crabs|2]] [[ECV_00081|3]] [[Bunny_Hop|4]] [[11052009_Kacey,_I_Love_You,_and_I_Need_You|5]] [[CWC address to Royal Board|6]] [[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.|7]] [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|8]]<br /> Image:Christshirt10.png|"The Two-Face"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_23rd%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt11a.png|"The Poké-Master"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_August_6th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt12.png|"The Horizontal Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_8th%2C_2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt13a.png|"The Jerkop"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_13th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt14.png|"The Greasy Flag"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_6th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_9th%2C_2009|2]] [[I_am_devoted_to_My_Sweetest_Ivy|3]] [[Matthew_5_27%2C_CWC_Confessions|4]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_17th%2C_2009|5]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_22nd%2C_2009|6]] [[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts|7]] [[9_October_2009|8]] [[Warning_-_Naughty_Women_;)|9]] [[Old_Time_Rock_and_Roll_on_Shredwud|10]] [[Brutal_Legend|11]] [[3_December_2009|12]]<br /> Image:Christshirt18.png|"The Star Fleet Captain"<br>[[CWC More Than A Feeling|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt17.png|"The Scuderia Autistirarri"<br>[[Chris's Big Night Out|1]] [[10 September 2009|2]] <br /> Image:Christshirt19.png|"The Flag-Waving Patriot"<br>[[Chris_Destroys_His_Vibrator|1]] [[A CWC Audition|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|3]] [[CWC_only_accepts_IN-PERSON_FEMALE_Encounters|4]] [[Challenge for Clyde|5]] [[Brutal Legend Plus|6]] [[For_Chris#IBA.27s_video|7]] [[IPods_Down_and_Listen_Up|8]] [[Hello,_Juffalo|9]] [[9 February 2010|10]]<br /> Image:Christshirt20.png|"The Captain Falcon"<br>[[Down with Asperchu|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt21.png|"The DangerStripe"<br>[[This was my fault|1]] [[Address to my CWCipedia SysOP|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt22.png|"The Cyclone Joker"<br>[[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_January_21st,_2009|1]] [[CWC_Callout_for_Miss_Emily_and_Stephanie|2]] [[CHRIS!!!_CHANDLER!!!|3]] [[A message to the Trolls|4]] [[Don't Mess With Me|5]]<br /> Image:ChrisShirt43.png|"The Swamp Monster"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate December 20th, 2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt23.png|"The Traffic Light"<br>[[Chris_Chan's_Public_Announcement|1]] [[A_Sonichu_Day|2]] [[Shout_out_to_Fans_in_Hospital|3]] [[To Clyde and Jack.MOV|4]] [[Kill De Jack|5]]<br /> Image:ChristshirtPoke.png|"The Manchild"<br>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt28.png|"The Rugby of Shame"<br>[[Christian's Update 11 September 2008|1]]<br /> Image:Parappashirt.png|"The [[PaRappa_the_Rapper|PaRappa]] Shirt" <br> [[51_50|1]]<br /> Image:sportsbra.png|"The [[Muscle_bra|Muscle Bra]]"<br>[[04232010_-_Autism_Awareness_%26_Men_Should_NEVER_be_Topless|1]] <br /> Image:sportsbra2.png|"The Muscle Bra 2"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt27.png|"The Dirty Dashiki"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 8th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|2]] [[CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 4th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 26th, 2009|5]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|6]] [[Challenge for Clyde II|7]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|8]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|9]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|10]] [[I am Alive|11]]<br /> Image:Christshirt37.png|"The [[Homos|Mount and Do Me]]"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt25.png|"The [[Duck|Duckie]] Shirt"<br>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|1]] [[Secret Weapon|2]] [[YouTube Finale|3]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 5|4]]<br /> Image:Christshirt26.png|"The Shamrock Shake"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 28th, 2008|2]] [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt29.png|"The Shamrock Stripes"<br>[[Chris Sex Videos|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 7th, 2009|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 12th, 2009|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 13th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 20th, 2009|5]] [[Clyde Cash the kid video|6]] [[For Kacey II|7]] [[To Clyde Gregg|8]] [[For Chris II|9]] <br /> Image:Christshirt31.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt32.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare Redux"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009|1]] [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt33.png|"The Bumblebee"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt35.png|"The Intimidator"<br>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out|1]] [[I Love You Kacey|2]] [[10242009|3]] [[29 January 2010|4]] [[C-Ya Later|5]] [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|6]] <br /> Image:Christshirt38.png|"The Rainbow Flag"<br>[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt30.png|"The Big Green"<br>[[We're Being Watched|1]] [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt41.png|"The White Trash"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009|1]] [[War Paint Video|2]] [[Some Favored Comedians|3]] <br /> Image:Christshirt45.png|"The Happy Jack"<br>[[CWC Dare|1]] [[June062010.MOV|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt46.png|"The Bordeaux Butcher"<br>[[Apology to Emily|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt40.png|"The Ivory Poacher"<br>[[25 September 2009|1]]<br /> <br /> </gallery><br /> </center><br /> <br /> {{Illustrations}}<br /> <br /> == Wrist warmer ==<br /> <br /> [[Image:Wrist Warmer.jpg|thumb|Wrist warmer]]<br /> <br /> Ever wonder what that thing is behind Chris's neck?<br /> <br /> {{quote|Yes, it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there.|Chris<ref>Email from Chris posted in old [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]] thread 162</ref>}}<br /> <br /> Chris most likely wears it as a counter to [[Wikipedia:Sensory defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], a condition common among autistics, in which a normally harmless sensation directly triggers a fight-or-flight reaction.<br /> <br /> == Cosplaying ==<br /> [[Image:502-CWCsAshVest.JPG|thumb|Dat hat is a-pretty-a-goddamn dirty]]<br /> <br /> Chris appeared in his [[Pokémon|Ash Ketchum]] costume from around [[2000]] to [[2004]]. It was originally created as a Halloween costume in either [[1998]] or [[1999]].<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> He proudly wore it to [[The GAMe PLACe]] every week<ref>[[Mimms]] [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/pvcc/viewtopic.php?p=17515#p17515 post] on [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]]</ref> and to the 2004 [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] convention. With it, he won a costume contest against 5 kids dressed up as Team Rocket. The prize was a t-shirt.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> <br /> <br /> For a while, Chris resurrected this look for his profile picture on [[The Hook Cafe]] and eventually evolved into the Gay Trucker.<br /> <br /> The Ketchum-style trainer outfit consists of: <br /> * Faux-denim vest<br /> * Cut up gardening gloves <br /> * Pokémon League ballcap <br /> * Fanny-pack (Also known as a 'belly-bag' and a 'bum-bag' to Britfags) <br /> The ensemble is usually accompanied by a yellow ''[[Pokémon]]'' tee-shirt, or white ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic Heroes]]'' tee-shirt underneath (see gallery below).<br /> <br /> Chris can no longer wear this costume due to his [[obesity|obscene girth]].<br /> <br /> <center><gallery><br /> Image:0501-CWCAsh2.jpg<br /> Image:0502-CWCAsh3.jpg|HOT ROD 138, I c-ch-choose you~!<br /> Image:0503-CWCAsh4.jpg<br /> Image:0647-CWCAshAnime.jpg|This is the most depressing thing ever seen by man kind.<br /> Image:Chris chan cosplay.jpg|You can tell this world is totally fucked-up when people start cosplaying ''as'' Chris<br /> Image:Chris-Chan_Cosplay.jpg|Well, it's certainly scarier than any Halloween costume you'll see on any other kid.<br /> </gallery></center><br /> <br /> ==Sauce==<br /> <references /><br /> <br /> {{Chris and}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Chris-chan]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:6_-_PowerRanger.png&diff=109602 File:6 - PowerRanger.png 2010-08-18T00:36:58Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_and_fashion&diff=109597 Chris and fashion 2010-08-18T00:27:12Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Wardrobe */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|thumb|Fashion passes. Style is forever.]]<br /> <br /> [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a somewhat peculiar taste in '''fashion'''. Although he is willing to [[Chris and money|spend thousands of dollars]] on [[video games]], [[toys]], and [[sex dolls]], Chris is very stingy when it comes to shopping for his clothes, which are exclusively purchased secondhand at thrift stores like Salvation Army and Goodwill. Therefore, the only clothes he owns are colorful collared shirts and undersized rugby shirts that have been marinating in his [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|bodily stench and fluids]] for the past decade. Since most of them are decorated with horizontal stripes, they only make him look [[Obesity|fatter]].<br /> <br /> [[Mailbag 42#The rugby shirt he wore for 3 days in a row isn't a favorite or anything|Mailbag 42]] revealed that at least one (the "Advice Dog" shirt) and possibly all of his shirts were purchased by his cruel, cruel [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] so people will notice the fact that he's [[Autism|"special"]] and [[Kick the Autistic|treat him with sympathy]]. Alternatively, it could be that the Chandlers just aren't exactly what you'd call "fashion savvy". Although his mother doesn't directly dress him anymore, Chris still chooses to wear these shirts, possibly out of a strong aversion to change, a common trait of [[autistic]] people.<br /> <br /> == Childhood ==<br /> [[Image:Ernie.jpg|thumb|Ernie also enjoys "The Classic".]]<br /> <br /> In his youth, Chris set the general tone for years to come with many striped polo and T-shirts and khaki pants. The only difference compared to today is that he sometimes even dared to wear single-colored shirts with his [[Sonic the Hedgehog|favorite game]] and [[television]] characters on them. The only article of clothing he owned until recently that didn't follow the "long-sleeved, colorful clown suit" theme is the [[Pokémon]] T-shirt that he has owned since he was 19. Being yellow, it does not look good on him.<br /> <br /> == Trademark clothing ==<br /> <br /> [[File:Chrischan5.jpg|thumb|left|Artist's vision of Chris's typical outfit, featuring the Horizontal Horror.]]<br /> <br /> Chris's typical outfit consists of:<br /> <br /> * His favorite shirt, a striped/weirdly patterned rugby shirt, which is so tight that it accentuates his voluptuous, masculine bosoms. This is the shirt that Chris almost invariably draws himself wearing in the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]]. <br /> * His [[Medallions of Fail|medallions]] (sporadically) / his [[High School Ring]]<br /> * A pair of [[Pedo-Glasses]] attached to the Glasses Chain of Fail.<br /> * Jeans or khaki slacks. Chris's jeans typically define his rear end to a disturbing level — he may be wearing women's jeans, or he may simply still wear pants his gut long ago outgrew.<br /> * [[Belt Buckle of Fail]]<br /> * Alternatively, a green terrycloth bathrobe with a mismatched (of course) black belt.<br /> * On occasion, a dark suit jacket, perhaps for the many [[Chris and death|funerals that plague his existence]].<br /> * Since late 2009, a [[sports bra]] to keep previously mentioned bosoms in check.<br /> <br /> The newest addition to his wardrobe is the [[Fridays After Five|I Enjoy Vagina shirt]].<br /> <br /> ==The "[[Ian Brandon Anderson|IBA]]" outfit==<br /> In mid-[[2009#June|June 2009]], roughly around the time he made friends, Chris temporarily decided that his current look was old hat. He got rid of many of the striped shirts (mostly because he couldn't fit into them anymore) and grew a terrible goatee. <br /> <br /> The reformed Chris's wardrobe consisted of:<br /> <br /> *Sunglasses over normal glasses (Glasses Chain of Fail remains)<br /> *T-shirt over long sleeved shirt.<br /> *Goatee.<br /> *Tattoo sleeves<br /> *A black vest that is too small for his girth.<br /> *[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]<br /> <br /> Unconfirmed reports state that he was seen walking around downtown [[Charlottesville]] blasting Guns 'n' Roses from a pocket radio and trying to pick up women.<br /> <br /> His new attire was first properly presented to the world in the [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video.<br /> <br /> Soon afterward, however, he went back to sporting his traditional clownshirts, and claimed that he was pressured into making the Rollin' and Trollin' video.<br /> <br /> ==The "Gay Trucker" outfit==<br /> [[Image:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Notice how his pose in this picture is eerily reminiscent of his pose in [[ShecameforCWC.jpg]].]]<br /> <br /> After he made a promise to leave the internet in the spring of 2010, Chris threw away his clown shirts, ditched the medallion, and picked up a new wardrobe in an attempt to look like a normal person. The result is a modified version of the IBA outfit. It has been observed that Chris tries to look like a bad boy, but he ends up looking like a [[gay]] trucker, hence the trolls' term for his new wardrobe.<br /> <br /> The only way he could make it look gayer is by combining it with his [[muscle bra]]. Which, unfortunately, he has. [[Fridays After Five|And in public.]] At this point, going back to the [[Sonichu Medallion]] would actually ''improve'' his chances of picking up girls.<br /> <br /> [[File:EnjoyVagaina.jpg|thumb|left|Deftly combining what Chris [[Coke|has too much of]] and what he [[China|will never have]].]]<br /> <br /> With the arrival of the gay trucker outfit also came an interest in T-shirts that boldly express Chris's desire for sex, often in exceedingly tasteless ways. The first clear look at one of these shirts was in a [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|profoundly disturbing video]] leaked in late [[April 2010]] which featured Chris wearing a [[parody]] shirt that read "[[homos|Mount and do me]]". That said, the video was made for a potential sweetheart that Chris desperately wanted to fuck, leaving open the possibility that Chris didn't intend to dress like that outside his [[Chris's room|bedroom]].<br /> <br /> Chris destroyed any hope of that being the case on 18 [[June 2010]] when he wore a shirt that said "Enjoy Vagina" to a public, family-oriented concert. He then topped himself later, by pulling that shirt over his head, and standing around in his muscle bra, which he had written "WANT WOMAN!" on. The common belief is that these tasteless, sexually themed shirts are the next evolution of the [[attraction sign]], a way for him to inform potential mates that he is both straight and available without ever having to talk to people.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> <br /> ==Theory of fashion==<br /> The clothes that Christian chooses seem almost like a costume for him, especially his infamous striped shirt. Given that he is [[autistic]], observers often speculate that he may have difficulty with identifying things visually, including himself. In [[Sonichu 7]], he alluded to having to take time to study his appearance in a mirror, possibly wearing the shirt in question. Either way, Christian seems to regard his shirt as an integral part of his identity in the same way that [[trolls]] do. <br /> <br /> His fashion sense has shown itself to be evolving in the last year, but moving in cycles. In [[2010]] he seemed to have ditched the Sonichu Medallion and moved into what could be described as a more edgy, hip, aggressive look. His success at being so is on par for course with the rest of his attempts at things.<br /> <br /> Of note, during his conversation with [[Kacey]] while posing as [[Liquid Chris]] he claimed to also own a striped shirt like the "impostor". He expressed much joy at the fact that it was red, white, and blue, implying a patriotic view of the colors.<br /> <br /> ==Wardrobe==<br /> Below is a gallery of most of Chris's wardrobe, along with links to the videos they appeared in:<br /> <center><br /> <gallery><br /> Image:1 - The Classic.png|"The Classic"<br>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_27th%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_18th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_19th%2C_2009|4]] [[CWC's_"It's_All_Coming_Back_To_Me"|5]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|6]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009|7]] [[SingStar_Challenge#Watch|8]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|9]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 4|10]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 22nd, 2009|11]] [[Show_RESPECT_to_me,_"C"CWC|12]] [[Sign_Destruction_Video|13]] [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|14]]<br /> Image:2 - Advice Dog.png|"The Advice Dog"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_24th%2C_2008|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_6th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_10th%2C_2009|4]] [[12_January_2010|5]] [[14_January_2010|6]] [[What's_the_Name,_Christian_Chandler,_C_H_R_I_S_C_H_A_N|7]] [[15 January 2010|8]] [[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L|9]]<br /> Image:3 - Impostor.png|"[[Liquid Chris|The Impostor]]"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_9th%2C_2008|1]] [[Chop_Chop_Onion's_Rap_Showdown|2]] [[Magical Man Potion|3]]<br /> Image:4 - Napoleon.png|"The Napoleon"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_17th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_4th%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_27th%2C_2009|3]] [[Challenge_for_Clyde_II|4]] [[15_October_2009|5]] [[9_December_2009|6]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|7]] [[22 January 2010|8]] [[I am Alive|9]]<br /> Image:5 - RacingStripe.png|"The Racing Stripe"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_10th%2C_2009|2]] [[Congrats,_Jack_Black|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt7.png| "The Power Ranger"<br>[[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_August_3rd%2C_2008|1]] [[CCWC's_Final_Warning_to_the_Second_CWC|2]] [[LOOK_at_the_truth!|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt8.png| "The Dunwich Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[More_for_the_crabs|2]] [[ECV_00081|3]] [[Bunny_Hop|4]] [[11052009_Kacey,_I_Love_You,_and_I_Need_You|5]] [[CWC address to Royal Board|6]] [[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.|7]] [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|8]]<br /> Image:Christshirt10.png|"The Two-Face"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_23rd%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt11a.png|"The Poké-Master"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_August_6th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt12.png|"The Horizontal Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_8th%2C_2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt13a.png|"The Jerkop"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_13th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt14.png|"The Greasy Flag"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_6th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_9th%2C_2009|2]] [[I_am_devoted_to_My_Sweetest_Ivy|3]] [[Matthew_5_27%2C_CWC_Confessions|4]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_17th%2C_2009|5]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_22nd%2C_2009|6]] [[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts|7]] [[9_October_2009|8]] [[Warning_-_Naughty_Women_;)|9]] [[Old_Time_Rock_and_Roll_on_Shredwud|10]] [[Brutal_Legend|11]] [[3_December_2009|12]]<br /> Image:Christshirt18.png|"The Star Fleet Captain"<br>[[CWC More Than A Feeling|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt17.png|"The Scuderia Autistirarri"<br>[[Chris's Big Night Out|1]] [[10 September 2009|2]] <br /> Image:Christshirt19.png|"The Flag-Waving Patriot"<br>[[Chris_Destroys_His_Vibrator|1]] [[A CWC Audition|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|3]] [[CWC_only_accepts_IN-PERSON_FEMALE_Encounters|4]] [[Challenge for Clyde|5]] [[Brutal Legend Plus|6]] [[For_Chris#IBA.27s_video|7]] [[IPods_Down_and_Listen_Up|8]] [[Hello,_Juffalo|9]] [[9 February 2010|10]]<br /> Image:Christshirt20.png|"The Captain Falcon"<br>[[Down with Asperchu|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt21.png|"The DangerStripe"<br>[[This was my fault|1]] [[Address to my CWCipedia SysOP|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt22.png|"The Cyclone Joker"<br>[[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_January_21st,_2009|1]] [[CWC_Callout_for_Miss_Emily_and_Stephanie|2]] [[CHRIS!!!_CHANDLER!!!|3]] [[A message to the Trolls|4]] [[Don't Mess With Me|5]]<br /> Image:ChrisShirt43.png|"The Swamp Monster"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate December 20th, 2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt23.png|"The Traffic Light"<br>[[Chris_Chan's_Public_Announcement|1]] [[A_Sonichu_Day|2]] [[Shout_out_to_Fans_in_Hospital|3]] [[To Clyde and Jack.MOV|4]] [[Kill De Jack|5]]<br /> Image:ChristshirtPoke.png|"The Manchild"<br>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt28.png|"The Rugby of Shame"<br>[[Christian's Update 11 September 2008|1]]<br /> Image:Parappashirt.png|"The [[PaRappa_the_Rapper|PaRappa]] Shirt" <br> [[51_50|1]]<br /> Image:sportsbra.png|"The [[Muscle_bra|Muscle Bra]]"<br>[[04232010_-_Autism_Awareness_%26_Men_Should_NEVER_be_Topless|1]] <br /> Image:sportsbra2.png|"The Muscle Bra 2"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt27.png|"The Dirty Dashiki"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 8th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|2]] [[CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 4th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 26th, 2009|5]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|6]] [[Challenge for Clyde II|7]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|8]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|9]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|10]] [[I am Alive|11]]<br /> Image:Christshirt37.png|"The [[Homos|Mount and Do Me]]"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt25.png|"The [[Duck|Duckie]] Shirt"<br>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|1]] [[Secret Weapon|2]] [[YouTube Finale|3]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 5|4]]<br /> Image:Christshirt26.png|"The Shamrock Shake"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 28th, 2008|2]] [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt29.png|"The Shamrock Stripes"<br>[[Chris Sex Videos|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 7th, 2009|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 12th, 2009|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 13th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 20th, 2009|5]] [[Clyde Cash the kid video|6]] [[For Kacey II|7]] [[To Clyde Gregg|8]] [[For Chris II|9]] <br /> Image:Christshirt31.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt32.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare Redux"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009|1]] [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt33.png|"The Bumblebee"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt35.png|"The Intimidator"<br>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out|1]] [[I Love You Kacey|2]] [[10242009|3]] [[29 January 2010|4]] [[C-Ya Later|5]] [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|6]] <br /> Image:Christshirt38.png|"The Rainbow Flag"<br>[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt30.png|"The Big Green"<br>[[We're Being Watched|1]] [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt41.png|"The White Trash"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009|1]] [[War Paint Video|2]] [[Some Favored Comedians|3]] <br /> Image:Christshirt45.png|"The Happy Jack"<br>[[CWC Dare|1]] [[June062010.MOV|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt46.png|"The Bordeaux Butcher"<br>[[Apology to Emily|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt40.png|"The Ivory Poacher"<br>[[25 September 2009|1]]<br /> <br /> </gallery><br /> </center><br /> <br /> {{Illustrations}}<br /> <br /> == Wrist warmer ==<br /> <br /> [[Image:Wrist Warmer.jpg|thumb|Wrist warmer]]<br /> <br /> Ever wonder what that thing is behind Chris's neck?<br /> <br /> {{quote|Yes, it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there.|Chris<ref>Email from Chris posted in old [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]] thread 162</ref>}}<br /> <br /> Chris most likely wears it as a counter to [[Wikipedia:Sensory defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], a condition common among autistics, in which a normally harmless sensation directly triggers a fight-or-flight reaction.<br /> <br /> == Cosplaying ==<br /> [[Image:502-CWCsAshVest.JPG|thumb|Dat hat is a-pretty-a-goddamn dirty]]<br /> <br /> Chris appeared in his [[Pokémon|Ash Ketchum]] costume from around [[2000]] to [[2004]]. It was originally created as a Halloween costume in either [[1998]] or [[1999]].<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> He proudly wore it to [[The GAMe PLACe]] every week<ref>[[Mimms]] [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/pvcc/viewtopic.php?p=17515#p17515 post] on [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]]</ref> and to the 2004 [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] convention. With it, he won a costume contest against 5 kids dressed up as Team Rocket. The prize was a t-shirt.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> <br /> <br /> For a while, Chris resurrected this look for his profile picture on [[The Hook Cafe]] and eventually evolved into the Gay Trucker.<br /> <br /> The Ketchum-style trainer outfit consists of: <br /> * Faux-denim vest<br /> * Cut up gardening gloves <br /> * Pokémon League ballcap <br /> * Fanny-pack (Also known as a 'belly-bag' and a 'bum-bag' to Britfags) <br /> The ensemble is usually accompanied by a yellow ''[[Pokémon]]'' tee-shirt, or white ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic Heroes]]'' tee-shirt underneath (see gallery below).<br /> <br /> Chris can no longer wear this costume due to his [[obesity|obscene girth]].<br /> <br /> <center><gallery><br /> Image:0501-CWCAsh2.jpg<br /> Image:0502-CWCAsh3.jpg|HOT ROD 138, I c-ch-choose you~!<br /> Image:0503-CWCAsh4.jpg<br /> Image:0647-CWCAshAnime.jpg|This is the most depressing thing ever seen by man kind.<br /> Image:Chris chan cosplay.jpg|You can tell this world is totally fucked-up when people start cosplaying ''as'' Chris<br /> Image:Chris-Chan_Cosplay.jpg|Well, it's certainly scarier than any Halloween costume you'll see on any other kid.<br /> </gallery></center><br /> <br /> ==Sauce==<br /> <references /><br /> <br /> {{Chris and}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Chris-chan]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:5_-_RacingStripe.png&diff=109596 File:5 - RacingStripe.png 2010-08-18T00:26:20Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_and_fashion&diff=109595 Chris and fashion 2010-08-18T00:21:54Z

<p>KitchenSink3: /* Wardrobe */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|thumb|Fashion passes. Style is forever.]]<br /> <br /> [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a somewhat peculiar taste in '''fashion'''. Although he is willing to [[Chris and money|spend thousands of dollars]] on [[video games]], [[toys]], and [[sex dolls]], Chris is very stingy when it comes to shopping for his clothes, which are exclusively purchased secondhand at thrift stores like Salvation Army and Goodwill. Therefore, the only clothes he owns are colorful collared shirts and undersized rugby shirts that have been marinating in his [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|bodily stench and fluids]] for the past decade. Since most of them are decorated with horizontal stripes, they only make him look [[Obesity|fatter]].<br /> <br /> [[Mailbag 42#The rugby shirt he wore for 3 days in a row isn't a favorite or anything|Mailbag 42]] revealed that at least one (the "Advice Dog" shirt) and possibly all of his shirts were purchased by his cruel, cruel [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] so people will notice the fact that he's [[Autism|"special"]] and [[Kick the Autistic|treat him with sympathy]]. Alternatively, it could be that the Chandlers just aren't exactly what you'd call "fashion savvy". Although his mother doesn't directly dress him anymore, Chris still chooses to wear these shirts, possibly out of a strong aversion to change, a common trait of [[autistic]] people.<br /> <br /> == Childhood ==<br /> [[Image:Ernie.jpg|thumb|Ernie also enjoys "The Classic".]]<br /> <br /> In his youth, Chris set the general tone for years to come with many striped polo and T-shirts and khaki pants. The only difference compared to today is that he sometimes even dared to wear single-colored shirts with his [[Sonic the Hedgehog|favorite game]] and [[television]] characters on them. The only article of clothing he owned until recently that didn't follow the "long-sleeved, colorful clown suit" theme is the [[Pokémon]] T-shirt that he has owned since he was 19. Being yellow, it does not look good on him.<br /> <br /> == Trademark clothing ==<br /> <br /> [[File:Chrischan5.jpg|thumb|left|Artist's vision of Chris's typical outfit, featuring the Horizontal Horror.]]<br /> <br /> Chris's typical outfit consists of:<br /> <br /> * His favorite shirt, a striped/weirdly patterned rugby shirt, which is so tight that it accentuates his voluptuous, masculine bosoms. This is the shirt that Chris almost invariably draws himself wearing in the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]]. <br /> * His [[Medallions of Fail|medallions]] (sporadically) / his [[High School Ring]]<br /> * A pair of [[Pedo-Glasses]] attached to the Glasses Chain of Fail.<br /> * Jeans or khaki slacks. Chris's jeans typically define his rear end to a disturbing level — he may be wearing women's jeans, or he may simply still wear pants his gut long ago outgrew.<br /> * [[Belt Buckle of Fail]]<br /> * Alternatively, a green terrycloth bathrobe with a mismatched (of course) black belt.<br /> * On occasion, a dark suit jacket, perhaps for the many [[Chris and death|funerals that plague his existence]].<br /> * Since late 2009, a [[sports bra]] to keep previously mentioned bosoms in check.<br /> <br /> The newest addition to his wardrobe is the [[Fridays After Five|I Enjoy Vagina shirt]].<br /> <br /> ==The "[[Ian Brandon Anderson|IBA]]" outfit==<br /> In mid-[[2009#June|June 2009]], roughly around the time he made friends, Chris temporarily decided that his current look was old hat. He got rid of many of the striped shirts (mostly because he couldn't fit into them anymore) and grew a terrible goatee. <br /> <br /> The reformed Chris's wardrobe consisted of:<br /> <br /> *Sunglasses over normal glasses (Glasses Chain of Fail remains)<br /> *T-shirt over long sleeved shirt.<br /> *Goatee.<br /> *Tattoo sleeves<br /> *A black vest that is too small for his girth.<br /> *[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]<br /> <br /> Unconfirmed reports state that he was seen walking around downtown [[Charlottesville]] blasting Guns 'n' Roses from a pocket radio and trying to pick up women.<br /> <br /> His new attire was first properly presented to the world in the [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video.<br /> <br /> Soon afterward, however, he went back to sporting his traditional clownshirts, and claimed that he was pressured into making the Rollin' and Trollin' video.<br /> <br /> ==The "Gay Trucker" outfit==<br /> [[Image:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Notice how his pose in this picture is eerily reminiscent of his pose in [[ShecameforCWC.jpg]].]]<br /> <br /> After he made a promise to leave the internet in the spring of 2010, Chris threw away his clown shirts, ditched the medallion, and picked up a new wardrobe in an attempt to look like a normal person. The result is a modified version of the IBA outfit. It has been observed that Chris tries to look like a bad boy, but he ends up looking like a [[gay]] trucker, hence the trolls' term for his new wardrobe.<br /> <br /> The only way he could make it look gayer is by combining it with his [[muscle bra]]. Which, unfortunately, he has. [[Fridays After Five|And in public.]] At this point, going back to the [[Sonichu Medallion]] would actually ''improve'' his chances of picking up girls.<br /> <br /> [[File:EnjoyVagaina.jpg|thumb|left|Deftly combining what Chris [[Coke|has too much of]] and what he [[China|will never have]].]]<br /> <br /> With the arrival of the gay trucker outfit also came an interest in T-shirts that boldly express Chris's desire for sex, often in exceedingly tasteless ways. The first clear look at one of these shirts was in a [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|profoundly disturbing video]] leaked in late [[April 2010]] which featured Chris wearing a [[parody]] shirt that read "[[homos|Mount and do me]]". That said, the video was made for a potential sweetheart that Chris desperately wanted to fuck, leaving open the possibility that Chris didn't intend to dress like that outside his [[Chris's room|bedroom]].<br /> <br /> Chris destroyed any hope of that being the case on 18 [[June 2010]] when he wore a shirt that said "Enjoy Vagina" to a public, family-oriented concert. He then topped himself later, by pulling that shirt over his head, and standing around in his muscle bra, which he had written "WANT WOMAN!" on. The common belief is that these tasteless, sexually themed shirts are the next evolution of the [[attraction sign]], a way for him to inform potential mates that he is both straight and available without ever having to talk to people.<br /> {{clear}}<br /> <br /> ==Theory of fashion==<br /> The clothes that Christian chooses seem almost like a costume for him, especially his infamous striped shirt. Given that he is [[autistic]], observers often speculate that he may have difficulty with identifying things visually, including himself. In [[Sonichu 7]], he alluded to having to take time to study his appearance in a mirror, possibly wearing the shirt in question. Either way, Christian seems to regard his shirt as an integral part of his identity in the same way that [[trolls]] do. <br /> <br /> His fashion sense has shown itself to be evolving in the last year, but moving in cycles. In [[2010]] he seemed to have ditched the Sonichu Medallion and moved into what could be described as a more edgy, hip, aggressive look. His success at being so is on par for course with the rest of his attempts at things.<br /> <br /> Of note, during his conversation with [[Kacey]] while posing as [[Liquid Chris]] he claimed to also own a striped shirt like the "impostor". He expressed much joy at the fact that it was red, white, and blue, implying a patriotic view of the colors.<br /> <br /> ==Wardrobe==<br /> Below is a gallery of most of Chris's wardrobe, along with links to the videos they appeared in:<br /> <center><br /> <gallery><br /> Image:1 - The Classic.png|"The Classic"<br>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_27th%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_18th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_19th%2C_2009|4]] [[CWC's_"It's_All_Coming_Back_To_Me"|5]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|6]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009|7]] [[SingStar_Challenge#Watch|8]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|9]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 4|10]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 22nd, 2009|11]] [[Show_RESPECT_to_me,_"C"CWC|12]] [[Sign_Destruction_Video|13]] [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|14]]<br /> Image:2 - Advice Dog.png|"The Advice Dog"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_24th%2C_2008|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_6th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_10th%2C_2009|4]] [[12_January_2010|5]] [[14_January_2010|6]] [[What's_the_Name,_Christian_Chandler,_C_H_R_I_S_C_H_A_N|7]] [[15 January 2010|8]] [[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L|9]]<br /> Image:3 - Impostor.png|"[[Liquid Chris|The Impostor]]"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_9th%2C_2008|1]] [[Chop_Chop_Onion's_Rap_Showdown|2]] [[Magical Man Potion|3]]<br /> Image:4 - Napoleon.png|"The Napoleon"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_17th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_4th%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_27th%2C_2009|3]] [[Challenge_for_Clyde_II|4]] [[15_October_2009|5]] [[9_December_2009|6]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|7]] [[22 January 2010|8]] [[I am Alive|9]]<br /> Image:Christshirt6.png|"The Racing Stripe"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_10th%2C_2009|2]] [[Congrats,_Jack_Black|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt7.png| "The Power Ranger"<br>[[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_August_3rd%2C_2008|1]] [[CCWC's_Final_Warning_to_the_Second_CWC|2]] [[LOOK_at_the_truth!|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt8.png| "The Dunwich Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[More_for_the_crabs|2]] [[ECV_00081|3]] [[Bunny_Hop|4]] [[11052009_Kacey,_I_Love_You,_and_I_Need_You|5]] [[CWC address to Royal Board|6]] [[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.|7]] [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|8]]<br /> Image:Christshirt10.png|"The Two-Face"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_23rd%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt11a.png|"The Poké-Master"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_August_6th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt12.png|"The Horizontal Horror"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_8th%2C_2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt13a.png|"The Jerkop"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_13th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt14.png|"The Greasy Flag"<br>[[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_6th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_9th%2C_2009|2]] [[I_am_devoted_to_My_Sweetest_Ivy|3]] [[Matthew_5_27%2C_CWC_Confessions|4]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_17th%2C_2009|5]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_22nd%2C_2009|6]] [[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts|7]] [[9_October_2009|8]] [[Warning_-_Naughty_Women_;)|9]] [[Old_Time_Rock_and_Roll_on_Shredwud|10]] [[Brutal_Legend|11]] [[3_December_2009|12]]<br /> Image:Christshirt18.png|"The Star Fleet Captain"<br>[[CWC More Than A Feeling|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt17.png|"The Scuderia Autistirarri"<br>[[Chris's Big Night Out|1]] [[10 September 2009|2]] <br /> Image:Christshirt19.png|"The Flag-Waving Patriot"<br>[[Chris_Destroys_His_Vibrator|1]] [[A CWC Audition|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|3]] [[CWC_only_accepts_IN-PERSON_FEMALE_Encounters|4]] [[Challenge for Clyde|5]] [[Brutal Legend Plus|6]] [[For_Chris#IBA.27s_video|7]] [[IPods_Down_and_Listen_Up|8]] [[Hello,_Juffalo|9]] [[9 February 2010|10]]<br /> Image:Christshirt20.png|"The Captain Falcon"<br>[[Down with Asperchu|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt21.png|"The DangerStripe"<br>[[This was my fault|1]] [[Address to my CWCipedia SysOP|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt22.png|"The Cyclone Joker"<br>[[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_January_21st,_2009|1]] [[CWC_Callout_for_Miss_Emily_and_Stephanie|2]] [[CHRIS!!!_CHANDLER!!!|3]] [[A message to the Trolls|4]] [[Don't Mess With Me|5]]<br /> Image:ChrisShirt43.png|"The Swamp Monster"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate December 20th, 2009|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt23.png|"The Traffic Light"<br>[[Chris_Chan's_Public_Announcement|1]] [[A_Sonichu_Day|2]] [[Shout_out_to_Fans_in_Hospital|3]] [[To Clyde and Jack.MOV|4]] [[Kill De Jack|5]]<br /> Image:ChristshirtPoke.png|"The Manchild"<br>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt28.png|"The Rugby of Shame"<br>[[Christian's Update 11 September 2008|1]]<br /> Image:Parappashirt.png|"The [[PaRappa_the_Rapper|PaRappa]] Shirt" <br> [[51_50|1]]<br /> Image:sportsbra.png|"The [[Muscle_bra|Muscle Bra]]"<br>[[04232010_-_Autism_Awareness_%26_Men_Should_NEVER_be_Topless|1]] <br /> Image:sportsbra2.png|"The Muscle Bra 2"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt27.png|"The Dirty Dashiki"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 8th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|2]] [[CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 4th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 26th, 2009|5]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|6]] [[Challenge for Clyde II|7]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|8]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|9]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|10]] [[I am Alive|11]]<br /> Image:Christshirt37.png|"The [[Homos|Mount and Do Me]]"<br>[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt25.png|"The [[Duck|Duckie]] Shirt"<br>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|1]] [[Secret Weapon|2]] [[YouTube Finale|3]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 5|4]]<br /> Image:Christshirt26.png|"The Shamrock Shake"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 28th, 2008|2]] [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls|3]]<br /> Image:Christshirt29.png|"The Shamrock Stripes"<br>[[Chris Sex Videos|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 7th, 2009|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 12th, 2009|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 13th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 20th, 2009|5]] [[Clyde Cash the kid video|6]] [[For Kacey II|7]] [[To Clyde Gregg|8]] [[For Chris II|9]] <br /> Image:Christshirt31.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|1]] <br /> Image:Christshirt32.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare Redux"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009|1]] [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt33.png|"The Bumblebee"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt35.png|"The Intimidator"<br>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out|1]] [[I Love You Kacey|2]] [[10242009|3]] [[29 January 2010|4]] [[C-Ya Later|5]] [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|6]] <br /> Image:Christshirt38.png|"The Rainbow Flag"<br>[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt30.png|"The Big Green"<br>[[We're Being Watched|1]] [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt41.png|"The White Trash"<br>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009|1]] [[War Paint Video|2]] [[Some Favored Comedians|3]] <br /> Image:Christshirt45.png|"The Happy Jack"<br>[[CWC Dare|1]] [[June062010.MOV|2]]<br /> Image:Christshirt46.png|"The Bordeaux Butcher"<br>[[Apology to Emily|1]]<br /> Image:Christshirt40.png|"The Ivory Poacher"<br>[[25 September 2009|1]]<br /> <br /> </gallery><br /> </center><br /> <br /> {{Illustrations}}<br /> <br /> == Wrist warmer ==<br /> <br /> [[Image:Wrist Warmer.jpg|thumb|Wrist warmer]]<br /> <br /> Ever wonder what that thing is behind Chris's neck?<br /> <br /> {{quote|Yes, it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there.|Chris<ref>Email from Chris posted in old [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]] thread 162</ref>}}<br /> <br /> Chris most likely wears it as a counter to [[Wikipedia:Sensory defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], a condition common among autistics, in which a normally harmless sensation directly triggers a fight-or-flight reaction.<br /> <br /> == Cosplaying ==<br /> [[Image:502-CWCsAshVest.JPG|thumb|Dat hat is a-pretty-a-goddamn dirty]]<br /> <br /> Chris appeared in his [[Pokémon|Ash Ketchum]] costume from around [[2000]] to [[2004]]. It was originally created as a Halloween costume in either [[1998]] or [[1999]].<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> He proudly wore it to [[The GAMe PLACe]] every week<ref>[[Mimms]] [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/pvcc/viewtopic.php?p=17515#p17515 post] on [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]]</ref> and to the 2004 [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] convention. With it, he won a costume contest against 5 kids dressed up as Team Rocket. The prize was a t-shirt.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> <br /> <br /> For a while, Chris resurrected this look for his profile picture on [[The Hook Cafe]] and eventually evolved into the Gay Trucker.<br /> <br /> The Ketchum-style trainer outfit consists of: <br /> * Faux-denim vest<br /> * Cut up gardening gloves <br /> * Pokémon League ballcap <br /> * Fanny-pack (Also known as a 'belly-bag' and a 'bum-bag' to Britfags) <br /> The ensemble is usually accompanied by a yellow ''[[Pokémon]]'' tee-shirt, or white ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic Heroes]]'' tee-shirt underneath (see gallery below).<br /> <br /> Chris can no longer wear this costume due to his [[obesity|obscene girth]].<br /> <br /> <center><gallery><br /> Image:0501-CWCAsh2.jpg<br /> Image:0502-CWCAsh3.jpg|HOT ROD 138, I c-ch-choose you~!<br /> Image:0503-CWCAsh4.jpg<br /> Image:0647-CWCAshAnime.jpg|This is the most depressing thing ever seen by man kind.<br /> Image:Chris chan cosplay.jpg|You can tell this world is totally fucked-up when people start cosplaying ''as'' Chris<br /> Image:Chris-Chan_Cosplay.jpg|Well, it's certainly scarier than any Halloween costume you'll see on any other kid.<br /> </gallery></center><br /> <br /> ==Sauce==<br /> <references /><br /> <br /> {{Chris and}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Chris-chan]]</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:Christshirt1.png&diff=109594 File:Christshirt1.png 2010-08-18T00:13:58Z

<p>KitchenSink3: uploaded a new version of &quot;File:Christshirt1.png&quot;: I have no idea what the hell I'm doing and can't upload the other shirt designs.</p> <hr /> <div>Drawing of Chris' famous shirt.</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:KitchenSink3&diff=109593 User:KitchenSink3 2010-08-18T00:09:06Z

<p>KitchenSink3: Created page with "I don't know shit about editing Wikis. Awwwww."</p> <hr /> <div>I don't know shit about editing Wikis. Awwwww.</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:Christshirt1.png&diff=109592 File:Christshirt1.png 2010-08-18T00:03:00Z

<p>KitchenSink3: uploaded a new version of &quot;File:Christshirt1.png&quot;: Reverted to version as of 23:59, 17 August 2010</p> <hr /> <div>Drawing of Chris' famous shirt.</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:4_-_Napoleon.png&diff=109590 File:4 - Napoleon.png 2010-08-18T00:02:32Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:3_-_Impostor.png&diff=109589 File:3 - Impostor.png 2010-08-18T00:01:57Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:2_-_Advice_Dog.png&diff=109588 File:2 - Advice Dog.png 2010-08-18T00:01:25Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:1_-_The_Classic.png&diff=109587 File:1 - The Classic.png 2010-08-18T00:00:29Z

<p>KitchenSink3: </p> <hr /> <div></div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:Christshirt1.png&diff=109586 File:Christshirt1.png 2010-08-17T23:59:38Z

<p>KitchenSink3: uploaded a new version of &quot;File:Christshirt1.png&quot;: Reverted to version as of 02:00, 4 January 2010</p> <hr /> <div>Drawing of Chris' famous shirt.</div>

KitchenSink3 https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:Christshirt1.png&diff=109585 File:Christshirt1.png 2010-08-17T23:59:23Z

<p>KitchenSink3: uploaded a new version of &quot;File:Christshirt1.png&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>Drawing of Chris' famous shirt.</div>

KitchenSink3