CWCki - User contributions [en]

Autism

2024-05-09T11:39:22Z

LemonShade: neurotypical doesn’t just mean non-autistic i’m not autistic nor am i neurotypical

:''For the song, see [[A-U-T-I-S-M]].''

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{HealthDisclosure}}
[[File:Auti.PNG|center]]
[[Image:Autismcard.jpg|thumb|200px|He plays this card a lot, such as during the [[Jail Saga]].]]
[[Image:086-BionicFlag.jpg|thumb|200px|[[Bionic the Hedgehog]] "conquering" autism (and "ATScI3") by confusing windmills with watermills.]]
[[File:Magi-Chan and I around 1218 neurotypical sheeple by nightstarrosechu2891.png|thumb|Image of Chris (and his husband Magi-Chan) around neurotypical (non-autistic) "sheeple."]]
'''Autism''' is a neurodevelopmental disorder and the lens through which [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] experiences the world. It is impossible to understand Chris's [[Chris and anger|defensiveness]], [[Chris and stress|hypersensitivity]], [[Examples of Chris's Ego|narcissism]], [[Chris and remorse|irresponsibility]], [[Man in the Pickle Suit|paranoia]], [[Greene County Conspiracy|victimhood]], [[Story of My Current Days|self-pity]], and [[Chris and reality|poor grasp on reality]] without understanding his relationship with autism.

Chris was diagnosed with the disorder in his early childhood (at a time when far less was understood about the disorder), and it became a cornerstone of his identity and influence on how he would act, alongside potentially other undiagnosed psychological or neurodevelopmental disorders. It should be noted that Chris's autism is not reflective of the experiences that most people who have with the disorder have, but since Chris has consistently pointed to autism whenever he does something wrong, and we have no way of knowing what other disorders that Chris may have without access to his medical documents, this article serves as good a place as any to discuss the nature of Chris's neuroses, whether they are tied to autism or not.

==Overview==
{{Protip|There is considerable debate on how to refer to the autism community, with some preferring diagnosis-based language (i.e. "Chris has autism"), adjectives (i.e., "Chris is autistic"), or nouns (i.e., "Chris is an autistic"). Since Chris never appeared to have a preference, the CWCki uses these terms interchangeably.}}

{{w|Autism}} is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by difficulty in communication and social interactions: issues that usually surface in childhood and carry on throughout life if not treated early on. The disorder represents a spectrum of different symptoms, behaviors, intellects, and support needs. Autism can also lead to restrictive and repetitive behaviors, intense passions known as special interests, and unusual fixations or approaches to stimulation. No two people with autism are exactly the same, and many common autism traits can even contradict each other (i.e. no eye contact vs. [[creepy stare|intense eye contact]]).

[[Image:461-AutismFight.jpg|thumb|200px|Chris at war with autism (or "ATSIMU") in [[China]]. Too bad you can't fight cannons with [[fangs]].]]

Autism is traditionally associated with either [[Slow-in-the-minds|intellectual disability]] or [[Honor roll|above-average intelligence]] (or both in the case of savants), but most autistic people carry average intelligence. The autism spectrum historically covered a number of related diagnoses, including [[Asperger's syndrome]], [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|which Chris resents]]. The DSM-5 replaced these diagnoses with a single diagnosis of ''autism spectrum disorder'', divided into three levels based on support needs.

Due to his status as an internet celebrity and lolcow, it goes without saying that Chris has a very unusual case of autism. Since he is arguably the most documented autistic person in modern history, he affects public perceptions of the disorder on the internet. That being said, it is highly likely that Chris has ''many'' other issues beyond just having autism, since Chris has demonstrated problems that can't simply be explained away by the disorder. (For instance, it shouldn't have taken him six or seven years to learn how to speak, even with severe symptoms. Meanwhile, his severe delusions that spiraled later in life demonstrate signs of a schizoaffective disorder.) Without a proper medical diagnosis, in part thanks to Chris's history of avoiding cooperation with people trying to help him understand himself on that level, autism remains the typical scapegoat to explain Chris's behavior, even if the truth may be more complicated.

Chris has built much of his identity around his high-functioning autism. His terror of being associated with severely autistic people causes him to be overly eager to prove his basic competence and cite his success in primary and secondary education. At the same time, his pride from accomplishing these things in spite of his disability has conditioned him to demand outrageous praise for his slightest efforts and infinite patience for his gravest errors. Moreover, Chris's belief that the entire Greene County Board of Education continues to irrationally persecute him for his autism has left him suspicious of opposing points of view and resolute that anti-autistic prejudice is the reason for any of his setbacks. The angst he has over his unsatisfactory graduation is made manifest in [[Sonichu (comic)|his webcomic]] as [[Count Graduon|one of the work's key villains]].

Chris not only seems to think that having autism imbues him with a [[Chris and his ego|special significance]], but also feels that his autism is completely different from that of literally every other person in the world who has autism (which, while not ''totally'' wrong, is a gross oversimplification of the disorder's spectral nature). Chris feels he is naturally better than everyone else and often talks down to people who display knowledge or experience of subjects he is unfamiliar with. During his conversation with [[Father_Call|Kacey's father]], Chris downplayed Kacey's knowledge of biology and healthcare despite being proven wrong mere minutes before in a debate over the genetics of autism.<ref>[[Father_call#Kacey's_boobs_and_Internet_fame]]</ref> At the same time, Chris believes he is not responsible for the majority of his mistakes. By being autistic, Chris rationalizes that it is wholly the fault of autism if he [[Twin Falling Towers|makes]] [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|poor]] [[Piedmont Virginia Community College#Kicked_out_of_college|decisions]].<ref>[[Jackie_E-mails_20]]</ref>

==Chris's symptoms==
{{protip|Do not use Chris to bash all autistic people, and do not complain about how he gives autism a bad name. He is one person on the autism ''spectrum''. This article mostly deals with Chris's autism.}}
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|Stacking objects is a common symptom of autism, and is often one of its first signs in a young child.]]

A 2004 [[Autism papers|psychiatric evaluation]] confirms that Chris has ''autistic disorder''. Though his original childhood diagnosis papers are [[2014 house fire|presumably lost forever]], Chris was diagnosed by actual specialists, not armchair psychologists.

Nevertheless, many [[trolls]] dispute the exact diagnosis of Chris's mental condition, on the basis that his observed behavior is inconsistent with that of various other autistics. CWC-related forums (and other forums, for that matter) have seen numerous testimonials about people who are undeniably autistic but nowhere near as fucked up as Chris has turned out to be, and in general, these forums do not consider Chris to be an example of what most autistics are like. They are well-aware that the condition is a spectrum.

Quite often, autistics are indeed able to learn social skills to a certain extent in the context of intellectual learning. Others can learn social skills the old-fashioned way, usually through joining a group and coming out of their shell. Some can even come off as being completely neurotypical because they have come to realize that they must adapt to others' expectations of what's acceptable if they wish to succeed in life. They may also adopt the alternative approach of "Haters Gonna Hate," surrounding themselves with like-minded people and not giving a fuck about the bullies.

Chris, however, demonstrates a willful ignorance of normalcy, with a sense of entitlement coupled with an expectation that others should not only understand his ridiculous idiosyncrasies, but also accept them at face value. Sometimes, he even wishes to force [[Dating education|them]] upon others.

A layman might come to the conclusion that Chris is not autistic, and he's just a regular, albeit quite idiotic, guy with a few "eccentricities" and personality flaws, or jump to the other extreme and conclude that Chris is completely [[slow-in-the-minds|mentally retarded]] or full-blown schizophrenic. Some folks argue that Chris's autism is so mild that it's barely relevant, while others attribute his entire personality to it.

But the truth appears to be in the middle: Chris's characteristics are most likely a combination of genuine autism, [[Barbara Chandler|bad parenting]], isolation, and other [[Chris and mental healthcare|mental impairments]].

His symptoms are listed below, coded to match [https://archive.ph/YxSOM the official DSM-5 diagnosis:]

===A: Deficits in communication and social interaction===
====1: Social-emotional reciprocity====
Chris struggles with social-emotional reciprocity, the two-way understanding required for successful social interaction.

[[Image:Nnocac.jpg|thumb|150px|left|Trolls manipulated Chris into [[Ohio Trip|driving all the way to Ohio]] to save [[Julie|a fake girlfriend]] – the only things Chris gained from the trip were these fast food receipts. Difficulties in discerning the motives and intentions of others is regularly observed among people diagnosed with autism.]]

=====Understanding others' intentions=====
Chris has difficulty gauging others' thoughts, feelings, ideas, and intentions. He doesn't always understand that these might be different than his own, or how to predict these behaviors. In [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|an email between Clyde Cash and him]], he sent Clyde a link to [[The MovingFoward videos|a video he made of himself destroying his PS3]]. He destroyed his PS3 under the egregiously mistaken impression that he'd be given $9,001 for it, which is in itself an indicator of his fundamental inability to gauge others' actual intents and future behavior. He filmed himself doing it specifically to prove to Clyde, who wasn't present for the destruction, that it happened according to the video's objective portrayal. However, he added that if Clyde showed the video to anyone Chris didn't mean to see it without paying him the money, "it can be considered [Clyde's] Word Alone, possible Movie Editing and Actors, and NOT Fact" as though the video would have any less evidential weight on others if he denied to them what he rightfully claimed to Clyde that it showed with enough certitude that he would give him thousands of dollars because of its being shown.

Chris places disproportional importance on literal statements. Chris acted as though he could convince others of a fact contrary to videographic evidence simply by stating it. Another example is virtually the entire [[Liquid Chris#Liquid Saga|Liquid Saga]], where Chris honestly, fervently, pathetically tried to demonstrate what was already blatantly obvious to everyone: that his name is not [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] and that Liquid was not him. He seemed to believe strongly enough [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|to become visibly frustrated]] that others might believe Liquid's statements in the face of the obvious that he had to continually counteract those statements with his own as though just the statements were the most important or most effective means of proving what everyone already knew.

Chris is extremely gullible. While autistics can have problems with social cues such as sarcasm, thus being gullible at times, Chris is much more gullible than other autistics, let alone ones that are high-functioning. This is more due to his [[Naïve|inexperience]]. One need only see his extensive [[List of Chris's sweethearts|list of sweethearts]] to see just how easily fooled he is. In addition, not only has he been fooled by trolls (of both sexes) pretending to be female sweethearts, he has fallen for trolls pretending to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] and approached him about making a ''Sonichu'' game. A telling statement comes from the aforementioned email to Clyde: "even if you upload the video yourself, it '''can be''' considered YOUR Word Alone[.]" (''emphasis added'') Chris might operate on the assumption that if a thing ''can be'' true, it's always reasonable to behave as though it ''is'' true no matter how slight the chance and no matter how much more likely it is to be false.

=====Empathy and sympathy=====
Chris shows very little [[White knight#Chris lacks empathy himself|empathy]] and [[Chris and kindness|concern for others]]. In his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|plea]] to Clyde, his advice after the suicide of Clyde's brother [[Ryan Cash]] was "find yourself a girlfriend." He asks for ED to [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|please understand]] him, because he is an "innocent victim of misunderstanding"—he wants empathy from others, but he can't return the favor. Chris primarily sees other people in terms of what they can provide for him; when accused of overstepping his bounds or other wrongdoing, he has no concept of [[Chris and remorse|remorse or apology]] except as something he must do to continue receiving favors. When forced to apologize, he makes insincere apologies followed immediately by further demands.

When Chris does attempt empathy, it's only when he already sees himself in the person, no matter how big the stretch is. This habit shows up in Chris's justifications for his votes. He voted for [[Obama]] because he was a victim of discrimination – equating Obama's struggle with racism to his own struggle with autistic persecution. He mainly voted for [[Hillary Clinton]] because she was a woman – which Chris has identified as since 2014. He never looked at either candidate's platforms or voted based on actual issues, just based on who he can "see" himself in.

=====Social awareness and boundaries=====
[[Image:Chris holding sign.jpg|thumb|right|The [[attraction sign]] in action. Struggling with social norms and approaching people is a sign of autism.]]
Chris struggles with social approach. He believed that holding up a literal [[sign]] with his requirements for an eligible sweetheart was a socially acceptable way to meet people. He would [[The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer|pace around]] public places aimlessly, and he has difficulty initiating conversations. He sometimes starts off the convo with botched attempts at pickup lines, and [[random-access humor]]. Nowadays, much of his social approach takes the form of meet-and-greet photo ops at [[conventions]], though he still screws it up.

Chris doesn't understand the concept of boundaries, whether physical or verbal. He kissed people he met seconds ago at [[TooManyGames]]. He was quite handsy with [[Megan]] and [[Emily]], and he buried his face in [[Catherine]]'s breasts. He regularly refers to his [[Mary Lee Walsh|superiors]] by their first name, sometimes even by [[Virginia Jeanine Sanford|pet names]] they don't even use. He doesn't seem to understand that different relationships call for different sets of social norms.

Chris lacks a conversational filter. He calls this [[Honest Content|honesty]]; normal people call it social dysfunction. Without provocation, he will tell you about his [[heterochromia|pinkeye]], his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]], his autism itself, and how he is a [[virgin with rage]]. Only when his [[Barbara|mother]] told him to knock it off did he actually give up telling everyone he was a virgin.<ref>[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)#Chris in Person (From THEIR Point of View)]]</ref> He mostly takes interest in himself while talking, only occasionally taking interest in his conversational partner.

All of the above could be explained by Chris's lack of social awareness. One notable instance of this, as revealed in the [[autism papers]], was when two [[Niggos|black]] ladies were speaking to Chris about his love quest, when Chris politely told them that they could not be his girlfriend because they were not white. Based on the report of the examiner, Chris believed he was merely informing the ladies as to his prerequisites for a potential sweetheart while oblivious to the fact he was being racially insensitive.<ref>[[Autism_papers#IDENTIFYING_STATEMENT:]]</ref>

====2: Nonverbal communication====
[[Image:0695-AnnaBD9.JPG|thumb|right|Awkward body language, as Chris displays here, is a common trait of autism.]]
[[File:0419-ChristianIs17-14.jpg|thumb|right|Demonstrating poor eye contact.]]
Chris can't show emotions well with facial expressions and body language. See [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters|his statement to the women of the world]] if you enjoy Chris appearing in your dreams. His inability to display emotions on his face has been called a "[[The Creepy Stare|dead fish expression]]" (though [[Barb]] displays a similar stare). When he does attempt to have an expression, it looks very cartoonish, possibly because he copied it from [[My Little Pony|actual cartoons]]. Also, notice his inconsistent eye contact in his [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]] news interview. He typically speaks in a monotone, and his attempts to sound expressive (see [[CWC's Message for Ivy]]) come off as creepy and unnatural. His incompetency with emotional display extends to his [[art]] and comics as well. He has a hard time displaying emotion on his characters' faces, and has even added emoticons :) to the speech bubbles to make up for his lack of ability to communicate through his art and writing alone.

Chris also has very poor facial and vocal recognition skills. [[Julie]] was a 13-year-old boy using an obvious falsetto and Chris fell for it. In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|one chat]], the boy made no attempt to disguise his voice and Chris was none the wiser, disclosing personal sexual details. Two images of different people were used to represent [[Blanca Weiss]], and Chris didn't notice. In an [[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|AIM Chat]] with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], she sent him a link to pictures of Megan Fox, and Chris complimented her on them, even though the two don't even have the same skin colour. He didn't realize that [[Emily]] and [[Kim Wilson|Kim]] were the same person, even though their voices and laughs were obviously identical. Chris is inconsistent with his self-portraits and drawings of other people, relying more on color schemes and cosmetics (hair, clothing choices, etc.) than on facial features to distinguish them apart. In his attempt at a [[Barack Obama#White House gag|political cartoon]], he relies on labels and arrows to distinguish the characters instead of exaggerating their facial features like mainstream political cartoonists. He also depicts Obama in a traditional African cap he seldom wears.

[[Image:0485-CWC18th16.jpg|thumb|left|Chris has had very little social interaction since high school. This is one of the few pictures of him with his [[gal pals]], and it only shows him from behind.]]

====3: Interpersonal relationships====
Chris's social dysfunction has caused him trouble with developing and maintaining relationships – platonic or romantic. Many non-autistics have the same problem, but Chris is particularly inept at socializing.

Chris's earliest friend, [[Sarah Hammer]], was more of a bully than a friend; she locked him in the crawlspace of her house. His high school [[Gal-Pals]] were "hired help": Bob and the principal arranged a deal where they were paid to hang out with Chris. He rarely hung out with them outside school hours, except on his [[My big 18th party|18th birthday]] and at [[prom]].

Chris has had very few friends as an adult. He loses friends regularly, manages to get [[banned]] from his favorite hangouts, and has no contact with any of his beloved high school Gal-Pals. He did have a circle of [[Pokémon League friends|adult friends who played Pokémon with him]], but he lost contact with them once he switched his focus to [[imaginary friends]].

Despite this, Chris's social life was robust in comparison with his love life. Chris is in his forties, and he hasn't had a serious romantic relationship or any consensual contact with the opposite sex (aside from a [[Mia Hamm|prostitute]] and [[Affair with Mother|his own mother]], though whether the latter was completely consensual remains questionable), or [[bisexual|same sex]] for that matter. His foray into [[Dating profiles|online dating]] was a failure, and every one of his [[sweethearts]] was either [[Megan|just a friend]] or a troll. He viewed his desperate search as a [[Love Quest]] – a saga that began on his 21st birthday, and only ended when he got into a [[polyamorous marriage]] with his OCs.

Chris is also estranged from his family outside his parents. Chris's half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] has blocked him on social media. He has little contact with his other half brother [[David Alan Chandler|David]], and knows even less of his half-sister [[Carol Chandler|Carol]].

As with many autistics, Chris does manage to have good relationships with animals, whether [[Patti|real]] or [[Sonichu (species)|fake]]. Animals are more direct and don't have as complex of social rituals as humans. Animals also serve as a "social lubricant" for people on the spectrum. Anyone who knows anything about Temple Grandin can back this up.

===B: Chris's restricted and repetitive behaviors===
To receive an autism diagnosis, the DSM-5 requires restricted and repetitive behaviors [https://archive.ph/YxSOM in at least two of the following four categories.] Chris meets all of them; examples are given below:

====1: Movements and speech====
[[Image:KillThatHexBawx.jpg|thumb|Chris refers to the [[Xbox]] as the "HEXbox", showing both his [[brand loyalty]] and vocabulary of made-up words.|250px]]
Chris often exhibits echolalia, which means he constantly repeats phrases from his favorite television shows, movies and video games, regardless of whether they fit the current situation. In some instances, he calls this [[Random-access humor|"humor"]]. He tends to use solipsistic neologisms; that is, he creates new words that only he himself understands and expects other people to comprehend them. He uses the same terms and [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|exact]] [[boyfriend-free girl|phrases]] [[sweetheart from the ground-up|frequently]]. Many articles on this very wiki have been written to explain the resulting [[CWC-isms]].

Autism is also linked to [[speech impediment]]s. Chris has trouble with articulation, and often slurs words together like "[[ED|Essaikapeeia Dramakka Payzh]]" and "[[Chris|Krishnwessonchanler]]". He frequently stutters, clutters his words, and speaks in a higher-pitched register.

Chris's unusual [[mannerisms]] are another sign. He rocks back and forth (dubbed "The Autistic Shuffle"), especially when [[stress]]ed. He uses the same gestures repeatedly, such as his [[stress sigh]], [[The Claw of Fail]], and the infamous [[Dramatic Glasses Removal]]. He feels the need to refer to people by their full names, plainly visible when he talks about himself, [[Clyde Cash]], or [[Adam Stackhouse]].

An overlooked but crucial characteristic affecting all of Chris's physical activity is his display of {{w|hypotonia}}, which refers to a distinct lack of muscle tone — in biological terms referring to tension rather than the colloquial use to describe muscle strength (although raw physical strength is also affected by it) — which affects motor skills as well as stamina. Chris is not only very clumsy, he shows abnormally low muscle strength and gets tired quickly even by [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|simply shuffling around for a couple of minutes]] — which cannot be entirely explained by his lack of physical exercise. Whenever Chris is shown sitting, [[Charlottesville Fashion Square#Chris captured on video|he is spread around like a rag doll]], [[:File:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|hanging limply]]—as his muscles cannot support his entire body properly.

[[Image:Please,_Donate_(720p).mp400001.png|thumb|left|250px|Chris has spent the majority of his adult life in his bedroom.]]

====2: Insistence on sameness====
One of the biggest symptoms of autism Chris displays is his fear and resistance to change, well beyond the point that it could be even related to his autism. Chris is reluctant to get or even look for a job as he has only worked [[Chris's resume|four months in his entire life]], has never come close to moving out, has a very hard time selling or giving up his toys or shirts, wouldn't stick to a diet and exercise program, [[Attraction Sign|doesn't try new ways to attract women]], and has a very hard time coping with his banishment from [[the GAMe PLACe]]—where he would usually spend his Fridays. This might be resistance to change of his old lifestyle of just going to school and coming home and playing video games; his proven tendencies to avoid responsibilities and self-improvement show that he is trying to remain a child or simply fears failure of all types.

Chris thinks in absolutes and in terms of clearly defined steps in order to do something. He thinks there must be sex on or by the [[third date]]. He describes his sadness in terms of his [[heart level]] and briefly mentioned a [[Scale of Respect]]. He feels that if he just knows the correct steps to getting a [[sweetheart]], he will be able to find one easily. His [[dating education|crash-course in dating]] and [[Dating|suggestions to Blanca]] assume that a relationship should follow a rigidly predetermined progression instead of a natural flow. In an [[Jackie E-mails 23|exchange of e-mails with Jackie]], Chris responded to her frank descriptions of his habits and lifestyle by saying she had exceeded the "Hurtful Truth Level"; while he knows he should be appreciative of hearing the truth about himself, this was the only way he could wrap his brain around the abstract idea enough to be able to tell her he thought she'd gone too far.

Some autistic people follow rules so strictly that it's bordering OCD. Chris however, has the opposite problem. He lives in a [[14 Branchland Court|filthy, unorganized house,]] makes comics with a very inconsistent plot, wears the same [[shirt]] for days at a time, and disobeys the [[Chris and the Law|law]] when it inconveniences him.

[[Image:0064-ChristianWSonic.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Autistics generally have "special interests." These interests can range from familiar subjects popular with most people, to specialised interests and areas of higher study, from elevators to astrophysics, or in Chris's case, Sonic the Hedgehog.]]

====3: Fixations and special interests====
Chris has an extremely narrow range of interests. He seems to only give a damn about video games, cartoons, prowling for his next [[sweetheart]], his initials, and [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], so much to the point where he practically places [[Sonichu (character)|him]] somewhere in everything he creates. He often wishes to [[dating|combine]] two [[LittleBigPlanet#First Date Level|interests]].

Unnatural relationships with inanimate objects are also a sign of autism; Chris has evident obsessions with his [[medallion]], his [[PlayStation 3]], and any number of other items that clutter up his [[Chris's room|room]]. Since autistics have difficulty maintaining relationships with people, they often end up becoming emotionally dependent on objects, though this symptom is seen much more in autistic children.

Although he does not demonstrate any [[Honor roll|competency]] with them, Chris has a fixation on numbers and statistics that would generally be irrelevant to others. He describes measures in concrete terms (e.g. "5 mies[sic] from the city"<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_0/Page_2</ref> instead of "outside the city"), and has a particular obsession with times and dates, timestamping nearly every scene in the comic and giving his characters birthdays and middle names that have no relevance to the plot (unless it becomes convenient to "[[pedofork|age up]]" the characters). Needless to say, Chris's tendency to blurt out exact dates and times (assuming he's not talking out of his ass) has made the job of [[CWChronology|CWCki chronologists]] much easier. On the other hand, his haphazard treatment of dates and times in the comic has led to countless [[Continuity in the Sonichu comics#Chronology|continuity errors]].

Chris's fixations also manifest as [[brand loyalty]]. Chris has been loyal to Nintendo, Sega and Sony, to the exclusion of [[HEXbox|Microsoft]]. He's loyal to [[McDonald's]] and dislikes [[Burger King]]. He felt that [[Harry Potter]] was a threat to [[Pokemon]]. His brand loyalty went beyond simple preferences and extended to actual obsessions and hatreds. He'd hype up [[Axe]] and [[Walmart]] in videos. He'd blindly trust advertisements and even include ads of his own in his comics.

Chris's [[transgender]] identity is yet another fixation. According to psychologist Ken Zucker, trans folks are more likely to be autistic than the general population. The link is caused by, among other traits, autistics' tendency to fixate on issues (in this case, gender). Many autistic males (including Chris) also have qualities that can be considered "girly", such as passiveness. Since they have less social awareness, they may behave in ways that can be considered atypical for either sex and display less regard for gender roles. Chris and many other autistics perceive their quirks as being "female in a male body" or vice versa, and assume that they will fit in better as their desired sex.

His fixation showed itself strongly when Sega changed [[Sonic]]'s arms from tan to [[Sonic Boom protests|blue]]. Chris launched a crusade that ended with him [[26 December 2014|macing an innocent GameStop employee]]; a criminal offense launched entirely by a minor change to a fictional character who happens to be Chris's icon.

====4: Sensory processing====
Autism affects how the brain interprets the senses. Chris is often either hypo- or hypersensitive to sensory stimulation. Chris often wears his accessories and medallions over top his clothing to avoid skin contact with metals and plastics. This is evident in the way in which Chris wears his watch over the cuff of his sleeve and wraps his medallion through the collar of his shirt.<ref>[[:File:0793-CWCIs24-2.jpg]]</ref> Most obvious however is his [[Fashion#Wrist_warmer|wrist warmer]] which he places on the chain of his medallion. Chris has stated that "[...] it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there."<ref>Email from Chris posted in old PVCC thread 162</ref> Loud sounds also bother Chris. He skipped pep rallies in high school,<ref>[[August 2013 Facebook Posts#Actual friendships]]</ref> and has expressed hesitation about visiting bars because of the noise.

Sensory dysfunction isn't limited to the five external senses – it extends to internal, "hidden senses" such as balance, body position, [[Obesity|hunger]], thirst, [[biological clock|time]], [[pickles|gag reflex]], and internal body pressure (such as when one has to [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|use the facilities]]).

==Severity of Chris's autism==
[[Image:CWCBitchesDunno.jpg|thumb|left|250px|Chris will be quick to tell you about it, though.]]

Informally, autism may be subdivided into separate classifications based on the intelligence and degree of function the autistic individual possesses; for a general idea, this crude scale could have levels of high-functioning, medium-functioning, and low-functioning. Chris has latched onto this concept and will frequently qualify his condition, saying he has '''high-functioning autism''', or '''HFA'''. Generally, HFA is loosely defined as; the ability to live in the mainstream world as opposed to being institutionalized, having near-normal comprehension, demonstrating fluent speech, and possessing average or above-average intellect. This presents Christian with an easy scapegoat and alibi: he cannot be blamed for his own failures because he has autism, but he does not accept treatment or advice for his "medium" or "low" level autistic traits because he's ''high-functioning'' and therefore, nearly normal.

[[Trolls]] have often noted that the "high-functioning" qualifier is '''not''' a clinical diagnosis and is '''not''' recognized by the {{w|DSM-IV|DSM-IV-TR}} or the {{w|ICD-10}}. This usually goes hand-in-hand with questioning the severity and/or diagnosis of Chris's impairment, if not outright calling him a [[List of Chris's lies|liar]]. However, the Chandlers didn't make the "HFA" label up, and compared to kids who can barely speak and just walk in circles all day, Chris is relatively close to neurotypical. Semantics aside, though, it's clear that Chris is far from normally-functioning. Only an [[Autism papers|updated]] [[28 October 2011#Arraignment, plea bargain, and sentencing|psychological profile]] would really provide insight into the complex and controversial mixture of autism and mental illness that is present within Christian.

The newer {{w|DSM-5}} ''does'' distinguish different levels of severity based on the amount of support needed, but the new term is "Autism Spectrum Disorder [[Vidya|Level 1]]", not "High-Functioning Autism". Additionally, the autism community detests functioning labels since they oversimplify the spectrum as a one-dimensional scale. When describing whether or not someone can speak, the community prefers "verbal" and "nonverbal" instead of "high/low functioning."

Disgustingly, but perhaps not surprisingly, Chris detests [[Slow-in-the-minds|low-functioning autistics]] in the [[Chris and hypocrisy|exact manner]] that he fears normal people will detest him. In [[Mailbag 25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]], he compares those with low-functioning autism with those who suffer from severe retardation or severe brain damage, thinking that they would have their arms linked together, have deformities, be confined to wheelchairs or crutches and drool and grunt and growl. He has also described them in extremely cruel and derisive terms, calling them "WINDOWS TO HELL" and compared them to "zombies".<ref>[[Mailbag_5#In which Chris speaks ill of the handicapped|Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_11#Elevators are important for the handicapped, so they don't want any phobias|Mailbag 11]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]]</ref> The irony of his resentment toward "low-functioning" autistic people is that he has a severely autistic cousin, as revealed in the [[autism papers]]; this probably means that either Chris is not aware of his own relatives (very probable), or he has disowned members of his own family on the basis of them having the same medical condition that he has (albeit more severely affected by it), being the autism-Nazi he is.<ref>[[Asperger syndrome]]</ref>

He explains that he refuses to date a girl with any form of autism because he fears that seeing them will make him think about what he might be like if he had anything other than high-functioning autism.<ref>[[Chris_chan_(CWCipedia)#Chris_Chan_on_sticking_things_up_b.2A.2A.2Ahole.|Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref> Chris believes he can do much more than any low-functioning autistic could, even as he lived with [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] well into his thirties, has never had a real girlfriend or held a steady job, and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|soils his pants]] on a semi-regular basis.<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

Still, presuming Chris is autistic, he is high-functioning since he can talk, drive, write and draw, [[Speech impediment|even if]] [[Chris and art|he's not]] [[Son-Chu#Distracted driving|the best]] [[Chris and writing|at these things]]. However, this also means that he has the same medical condition as Elon Musk, Temple Grandin, and [[Pokémon|Satoshi Tajiri]], amongst many others, yet he has failed to do anything significant with his adult life – hence proving that his vulgarity and failure are, for the most part (this is further elaborated on below), his own fault.

But what's most hypocritical of it all is that Chris himself allegedly stopped speaking at the age of one and didn't speak again until he was seven. This is a major language delay, and he would have been considered low-functioning at the time. This is especially relevant since Chris was diagnosed in the eighties, and HFA/Asperger's was only recognized in the English-speaking world in the 1990s. At the time of his diagnosis, being autistic required at least a delay in speech acquisition, if not complete muteness.

{{clear}}

==Onset and diagnosis of Chris's autism==

{{quote|No one GIVES A SHIT that you are autistic, they NEVER DID.|[[Jackie E-mails 23|Jackie]], telling Chris something he'll flat out ignore.}}
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|Now GodBearJesus can't get him to shut up.]]

Chris's version of how he developed autism is best explained in the [[Song of Christian]] video. There he explains how a [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]] locked him in a room filled with toys at around age 1 1/2. After crying for hours, he emerged from the room unable to talk; as Chris himself puts it, "[[Chris and religion|God]] put the mute button on me".<ref>[[Song of Christian#The actual poem]]</ref> (This implies that Chris could talk before this incident, which directly contradicts Chris's own parents stating that he never spoke until around the age of seven.) Most specialists claim that these symptoms of autism begin to show around that age anyway,<ref>{{w|Autism#Characteristics|Wikipedia: Characteristics of autism}}</ref> so even if the events of the story happened, the babysitter didn't cause the autism. It is far more likely that Chris's parents simply looked for anyone to blame for Chris's sudden loss of language development, even a random babysitter. Notably, Chris has diverged from this story before, having claimed at least once that he was intentionally "injected" with autism by doctors when he was a child as if that were even possible. Nevertheless, it speaks volumes on the [[List of Chris's lies|veracity]] of the former account if he can't even keep his story straight, not to mention that Chris probably [[Naïve|has little idea on the causes of autism]] anyway.

As for how Chris ''actually'' became autistic, studies have shown that there is a [https://archive.is/PROpt positive correlation between the age of the mother and the risk of autism]. Given that [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] was 40 years old when she gave birth to Chris, this is a likely explanation.

It is also worth noting that [[Bob]] was an engineer, and studies have found higher autism rates among children of engineers (and other technical occupations).<ref>https://archive.is/BHfBO</ref> Bob's granddaughter [[Savannah]] is also autistic.

It is currently unclear how Chris came to be considered as "autistic", although Chris has claimed that his parents possess official documentation about this in a safe. When pressed to release this information, he provided a [[autism papers|2004 psychiatric evaluation]] that states Chris was diagnosed with autism when he was "around age five or six". However, there's no way to be sure if the evaluator simply wrote down Chris's responses to his questions or independently verified them. (For example, Chris might not remember his exact age when he was diagnosed, but you'd think his medical records could be more precise than "five or six".) By the time of the Chandlers' legal battle with Greene County, Chris's autism seemed to have become a universally accepted fact, but the details of how, when, and where Chris was diagnosed remain a mystery.

When recounting his childhood, Chris usually skips straight from the "evil babysitter" incident to age seven, so we know very little about what (if any) treatment he received during this crucial period of development. In a [[CWCipedia]] [[mailbag]], Chris claims that when he was young, his parents were told he would never be able to read, write or function on a normal level. He and his doctors have now upgraded his condition to "high-functioning", but apparently his incredibly abysmal upbringing has actually allowed it to progress to mid-functioning at best.

In his "Song of Christian" video, he explains that his mother took him to the toy department and coaxed him to read aloud the names of Go-Bots, and later [[Transformers]]. Chris says he began speaking again when he was seven – that is, in [[1989]], when the Transformers line was on its last legs and the Go-Bots line had long since vanished. This would seem to indicate that this form of "therapy" had to have gone on for several years before producing any results.

{{clear}}

==Persecution==
Chris attended [[Greene County Primary School]], apparently without incident, from age 5 until age 9. Problems arose for him in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], where he alleges that the faculty wanted to remove him from mainstream classrooms and send him to what he calls an institution. He also claims that the teachers at the school held him down and recorded his screams. Chris frequently cites this as evidence that the school was senselessly cruel towards him, for no reason apparent to him except an innate fear and distrust of autistic people. More probable, given Chris's ongoing behavioral issues, is that he threw a temper tantrum so big it forced the faculty to physically restrain him while refusing to restrain himself. There's no way to know if Greene Elementary treated Chris unfairly, but the incident does suspiciously resemble Chris's [[arrest]] in July 2005. The Chandlers sued to prevent the school board from removing Chris from mainstream education before ultimately relocating to Chesterfield County to continue Chris's mainstreaming there.

Chris frequently brings up that the reason people used to [[Kick the Autistic|be cruel to him]] in his childhood was because "they did not understand Autism". In the [[1980s]]. When autism had been known for around 40 years. When asked about why they did not understand, Chris delivers his canned response of "I do not know".

There's no way to know how much of Chris's attitude about the Greene County crisis is based on his personal recollections or what he was later told by his parents, who themselves seem unusually paranoid about the county's vendetta against their family. However, the result of the incident is clear: Chris emerged from adolescence firmly believing that many people not only misunderstand autistic people but hate and fear them. He seems to believe this prejudice is based not on a person's actions (e.g. throwing fits and irrationally screaming) but on a person's mere identification as autistic, regardless of function. Given Chris's fear of low-functioning autistics, he may in fact think this prejudice is [[Chris and hypocrisy|perfectly justified]], but wrongfully targeted at a high-functioning individual. Of course, in Chris's mind, he may as well be the only high-functioning autistic in the Universe, so he is the one and only innocent victim in "everyone's favorite game, [[Kick the Autistic]]".

Chris's tactful and sensitive comments on a news story about a woman with [[Asperger syndrome]] being raped revealed that he believes the media, like the rest of the world, has a bias against autism similar to "{{w|Missing white woman syndrome|Missing White Woman Syndrome}}", and that the story wouldn't have been reported if the victim was a woman with "proper" autism.

==Chris's misconceptions about autism==
It's not clear that Chris has any understanding of what, precisely, autism is, except that a) he has it, b) it's a bad thing, and c) [[Chris and his ego|he's a brave little boy for living with it]]. His song "[[A-U-T-I-S-M]]" sums up his attitudes about the disorder:

{{quote|A-U-T-I-S-M: what does it mean? Silence and friends unseen! A few brains as well: that is autism! And that makes us seem special to you!|Chris, attempting to spell out autism in more ways than one}}

To Chris, that's all it is — a condition that makes you a bit smarter than normal human beings and mysteriously makes people not want to be your friend.
[[File:Mii.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's personification of autism for beating up in Super Smash Bros.]]
Chris also seems to only be aware of the symptoms of autism that fit in with his odd, pseudo-Bohemian lifestyle. Asexuality is very common in autistic people; this is because any form of romance or sex may be too intimate for an autistic mind to cope with. This completely contradicts Chris's "[[Love Quest]]" and suggests that he is actually trying to compensate for his inability to feel true sexual attraction, even if that means becoming a genuinely disturbing pervert. His tone-deafness for singing is fairly unusual for an autistic individual as well – autistic people tend to have stronger pitch perception, and they are more likely to have perfect pitch than the general population.

Chris [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|considers himself to have "Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People",]] suggesting that he believes [[Chris and his ego|he is a prevalent figure in the autistic community.]].

In a [[May 2010]] [[Some Favored Comedians|video]], he stated that our society is spending so much time on the Internet that ''everyone'' is becoming autistic.<ref>[[Toucher and Rich Segment#Chris's Response|Chris responds to Toucher and Rich, May 2009]]</ref><ref>[[Some Favored Comedians]]</ref> This further proves that people with little to no social contact shouldn't attempt social commentary. That, and Chris has no fucking clue what his own disorder is actually ''like''. In [[November 2010]], he tried to use this excuse to guilt trip [[Jackie]] into being sorry for yelling at him, which worked as well as you'd expect.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref>

Chris's failure to understand the symptoms of autism may well explain some of his odd behaviors. Due to lack of social activity and poor theory of mind, Chris doesn't seem to realize that his behaviors are what they are, as best demonstrated by his belief that [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|it is normal for an adult to shit themselves]]. Chris does not recognize the differences between himself and others, and this applies to the differences between himself and neurotypicals - and, seeing no differences, he believes his autism to have been thoroughly conquered, even while embodying every single trait of it.

===Chris on the causes of autism===
There's a broad scientific consensus that autism largely arises from genetic factors. Chris's own case is consistent with the theory that children born to older parents are at greater risk of developing autism.<ref>https://archive.ph/ckSNI</ref> Bob and Barb were 54 and 40, respectively, when Chris was conceived.

Chris's own expressed views on the root causes of autism are all over the map. He's espoused a few different theories at different times and in different situations. His oldest theory, dating back to the [[Song of Christian]] in the late 1990s, is that the [[abusive babysitter]] was responsible for his condition. In [[Mumble 3|his arguments with]] [[Clyde Cash]] in early 2009, he said that "scientifically speaking, [autism] has possibly come from a drug, or otherwise it may possibly be genetic", and that the babysitter incident merely "brought out the, uh, curse that was buried within me."

When explaining his condition to [[Father Call|Matt Devoria]] late in the fall of 2009, Chris insisted that autism has no genetic factors. In that instance, however he had an obvious agenda. He hoped to convince Matt that any children he fathered with Matt's daughter [[Kacey]] wouldn't wind up inheriting his condition; because of this, it's difficult to say exactly how sincere he happened to be at that moment.

To muddle the issue even ''further'', in [[Mailbag 12]], Chris blamed the cause of autism on a shot "the doctor's [sic] optionally give to the child after birth", apparently in reference to the highly disputed {{w|MMR vaccine controversy|urban myth}} alleging that childhood vaccinations lead to autism. It's not likely that Chris even has that much of an awareness of the facts and assertions of said myth, and was probably looking for a throwaway excuse to deny any hereditary factors.

In a [[Some Favored Comedians|video]] in 2010 Chris said the Internet made people autistic, likely confusing the hyperbolic claim often made jokingly to that effect with fact. Ironically Chris's excessive use of the Internet in place of human interaction has probably done more to exacerbate his symptoms than almost anything else.

In his [[Autism Tutorial Part 1|Autism Tutorial]] from early 2011, Chris slewed back toward a more mainstream view, discussing the genetic factors behind autism and complaining about how his parents conceived him late in life. He also, however, warned viewers that smoking, drinking, or exposure to car exhaust could cause dangerous genetic damage that might result in autistic children.

===Chris versus Asperger syndrome===
{{see also|Asperger syndrome}}

Chris is easily outraged by any attempt to associate or confuse autism, high-functioning or otherwise, with Asperger syndrome, a similar condition now considered by many experts to overlap with HFA on the autistic spectrum. In fact, Asperger syndrome was eliminated and replaced with "autism spectrum disorder, level 1" in the new DSM-V, making both the condition and "high-functioning autism" one and the same.<ref>https://archive.is/TPWcu</ref>) At times, Chris has stated that he dislikes Asperger syndrome because sufferers of the disorder supposedly steal sympathy away from autism awareness. He has also claimed that the name is too close to "ass burger" or "ass booger" for his taste. In the early days of the CWCipedia Mailbag, asking Chris about Asperger syndrome was the most effective way to troll him; this culminated in the creation of [[Asperchu]].

In the present, Chris simply hates Asperger syndrome because it reminds him of how angry he got the last time someone brought it up — in other words, a completely unjustifiable opinion. Chris has declared himself "close-minded" on the subject, dismissing all scientific opinion contrary to his own, and angrily refuses to be convinced that he does not occupy a more favorable (exactly what that means depends on whether Chris is looking for pity or adulation at the time) tier of the spectrum.

===Chris on Neurotypicality===



Chris also has little understanding of the concept of neurotypicality, the state of lacking any kind of neurologically-atypical traits. Some people on the autism spectrum, especially those with [[Aspergers]], are deemed to be of above-average intelligence or possess a special talent in another field like music or art. Chris has taken that to mean that he himself must also be in that same group of autistics, where he is much smarter than the average person. This is especially prevalent during the Dimensional Merge era, where he refers to non-believers as "neurotypically hindered".

==Chris on autism education==
Chris is a firm believer in mainstream education for children with autism, a trait he doubtlessly picked up from his parents, who went to [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|incredible lengths]] to keep him in mainstream classrooms throughout his school years. He had special education classes in addition to his mainstreaming - [[coping]] skills classes during both middle and high school.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails]]</ref>

[[Mailbag 12|When asked for his advice on how to raise an autistic child]], Chris replied "...Most Importantly, MAINSTREAM; let your child be free to communicate and associate with the Normal Society. Special Education is okay, but that will not do in the longest run." Later, [[Mailbag 15|for advice on how "to succeed despite being afflicted with Asperger's"]], Chris's only response was, "My advice is to Mainstream the child."

During a [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|video from April 2010]], Chris read off a lengthy printout of autism-related information. After quoting a passage about how the education of autistic children should be undertaken by trained professionals in specialized settings, Chris offered his own opinion.

{{quote|As for me though, I highly recommend mainstreaming, lettin' 'em go though normal life. I mean yeah, give 'em the special treatment while they're young... but when you get 'em in elementary or middle school... or high school, mainstream is the way to go.|Chris, [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]}}

In short, Chris believes that the approach that produced the man as we know him today (i.e. ignoring the problem and doing nothing to help it) is the best possible way to raise and educate children with autism.

==Autism cured?==

[[Image:454-CWCsPossibleFuture.JPG|thumb|Autism appears to be in Chris's future...]]

Chris's greatest dream is that his autism might one day be cured (although in 2006 he would have unhesitatingly sacrificed such a cure in order to obtain a [[PlayStation 3]]). There are instances of children inexplicably recovering from the symptoms, but there is no known cure for autism that can simply be applied to everyone like Chris's "homo vaccine." Imagine the surprise of the mental health community, then, when Chris revealed in [[March 2009]] that he had overcome his autism once and for all:<ref>[[Sarah Reveals Herself]]</ref>

:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I'm not going to blame it on my autism; I have realized that I am over that now.
:'''Sarah May:''' Over what?
:'''Sarah May:''' Over your autism?
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' yes
:'''Sarah May:''' . . .
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' anyway, what is it that you want to do?
:'''Sarah May:''' Christian
:'''Sarah May:''' Are you serious?
:'''Sarah May:''' Autism is not influenza
:'''Sarah May:''' You don't 'get over it'
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I've broken out of my autistic shell, and I am better able to socialize in public, with the past practices online.

Chris claimed during the same chat that he may not be making sense due to a virus, easily allowing for him to retract this. Fortunately, Chris has discovered that [[stress]] is a more socially popular scapegoat for his personal shortcomings. Of course, people learn to manage stress, but what do you expect?

As of [[May 2009]], Chris seemed to have regained his autism and was back to blaming it for all his problems, seemingly believing that autism is as easy to shake/regain as the common flu. However, [[November 2009]] saw Chris again claiming to have been miraculously cured, as stated at the end of part 2 of his [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] presentations, where he described himself as a "high-functioning autistic ''recovered''". A [[December 2009|month later]], Chris again backpedaled; in response to ED's claim he was "suffering" from autism, he [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|agreed]] that "''I still am for real.''"

Chris's flip-flopping self-diagnosis simply illustrates his misunderstanding of his problems. Since autism is his scapegoat for when he fucks up, to him that's really all it is — a disease that makes people fuck up all the time. Therefore, when he fails, he has a bad case of autism, and when everything is going well (such as when he believes he has a girlfriend), he thinks the autism has gone away. What Chris really wants, then, is not a cure for autism but a life in which nothing happens that he would need to blame on his autism; that is, a life in which he has a girlfriend and nobody criticizes him.

In June of 2016, he [[Announcement_06292016#Video_2|claimed to have cured his autism]] using [[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis]]. He stated that the track made him think clearer and [[Chris and socialization|interact better with others]]. However, he has shown no improvement in the quality of his recent videos, and he would continue to make autism-related content in the future.

==Things Chris has not blamed on his autism==
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|What did you expect?]]

==Chris and other autistics==
===Chris on other autistics===
{{Dated}}
Listening to Chris go on about "us TRUE and HONEST autistics," you might think he has some kind of misplaced sense of autistic solidarity. But this would merely be dumb, and Chris-chan always shoots for both dumb and repugnant, so the reality is that he doesn't give a shit about anyone's autism but his own. He calls lower-functioning autistics "windows into hell"<ref>[[IRC (17 December 2008)]]</ref> and regards them with [[Chris and hypocrisy|exactly the same kind of fear and mistrust he bitches about people treating him with]] when in reality many much lower functioning autistics lead far more independent and fulfilling lives than he does. He has once expressed a disdain for others with high-functioning autism, with HFA being one of the characteristics excluding a woman from being a [[attraction sign|potential sweetheart]]. Meanwhile, he looks at people with [[Asperger Syndrome]], who are on roughly the same part of the spectrum as him, as dirty whores trying to somehow steal the limelight from "real" autistics (ironically, many feel this way about Chris).

Chris has only once included another autistic person in his comics. In emails with [[Sarah Jackson]], she told Chris that her sister was also a high-functioning autistic. When Sarah was included in [[Sonichu 9#Episode 19: Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)|Episode 19]], so was her sister, [[Rita]]. When Rita was given dialogue after Sarah's [[death]], what she said made so little sense grammatically (even by [[Chris and writing|Chris's standards]]) that it is hard to see it as unintentional. It can, therefore, be speculated that Chris, thinking his own autism so much better than anyone else's, was attempting to make Rita seem as unintelligent as he assumes other autistics and people with mental disorders are.

His stance on autistic people would seem to shift a little in 2011, with him further believing himself to be a spokesperson for autism. Chris had attempted to educate people about autistic people in his Little Big Planet 2 series, the [[Autism Tutorial]]. The second part of the series had Chris decreaing that all autistic people should "man and woman up, respectively" in order to socialize with other people. In the extra part of the series, Chris slapped his representation of Hans Asperger out of the belief that he "selfishly put his ill name" with association with the disorder.

Chris has also claimed that his long-time friend [[Anna McLerran]] is autistic.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 20 October 2021]]</ref>

===Other autistics and Chris===
It should be noted that not all autistics are like Chris. Every person's experience with autism is different and every autistic person has a different combination of symptoms, social skills, sensory issues, empathy, special interests, routines, repetitive and restrictive behaviors and more.

A common analogy for this is that an autistic brain is a "melting pot" or "soup" of symptoms and behaviors <ref>https://autisticadvocacy.tumblr.com/post/113883336014/shades-of-slander</ref>. One person's soup might just be a bit salty, but still good, as they might show a few symptoms but still live a happy life. Another person's soup might taste horrible without seasoning, as they might need some support to function day-to-day.

It just so happens that Chris's soup is a disgusting mixture of sewage, [[April 16 Fetish Vids|Fanta]], rotten eggs and [[Semen|Comeuppance]], as he has an extremely unfortunate combination of symptoms and behaviors.

==Autism Deferred Disposition==
{{main|Jail Saga#Deferred disposition and sealing of case}}
{{Dated}}
{{quote|and the court finds by clear and convincing evidence that the criminal conduct was caused by or had a direct and substantial relationship to the person's disorder or disability|Excerpt from §19.2-303.6<ref name=autismcard>https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/19.2-303.6/</ref>}}

In [[August 2021]], Chris was arrested for the charge of [[incest]] on his [[mother]]. During the court proceedings, his court-appointed lawyer, [[David Heilberg]], filed on 5 [[August 2022]] for §19.2-303.6<ref>[[:File:Court Record - Greene Circuit Court - Incest - (Chris, CR22000141-00) - 9 August 2022 Pleadings-Orders.png]]</ref> - deferred disposition based on Chris having autism, which the court granted. In effect, the law provides that if the court would be justified in a finding of guilt, and that autism had a direct cause in Chris's actions in being a motherfucker, that any further proceedings could instead be deferred and Chris put on probationary terms. If Chris completes probation, the incest charge could be dismissed; if he fails, the original proceedings continue to a formal verdict of guilt and sentencing.<ref name=autismcard></ref>

== References ==
<references/>

==See also==
* [[Asperger syndrome]]
* [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]
* [[A-U-T-I-S-M]]
* [[Autism Tutorial]]
* [[Chris and psychology]]
* [[Kick the Autistic]]
* [[Slow-in-the-minds]]
* [[Stress]]

==External links==
*[https://web.archive.org/web/20180626224122/https://autism.wikia.com/wiki/Christian_Chandler Christian Chandler on the Autism Wiki]
{{Health}}
{{Love quest}}

[[Category:Autistic Spectrum Disorders]]
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]

Obesity

2024-04-28T23:17:34Z

LemonShade: /* Denial */

{{Honest}}
{{HealthDisclosure}}
{{quote|One more thing, [[Chris and reality|I AM NOT OVERWEIGHT!!!!!!!!!]]|Chris, lying to a [[white knight]]<ref>[[White knight emails]]</ref>}}
{{Quote|I do not feel good hearing remarks or comments that have relation to my gut.|Chris to [[Jackie]]<ref>[[Jackie Chat 6]]</ref>}}

[[File:Ecp00066.jpg|thumb|[[List of Chris's edits to the CWCki#Christianchandler|Look at his "slender" figure.]]]]

'''Obesity''' is perceived to be a worldwide epidemic, especially in the [[United States of America]], with about 73.6% of adults overweight and 42.5% obese.<ref>https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/obesity-overweight.htm ''CDC FastStats - Overweight Prevalence, 2017-2018''</ref> While [[Chris]] is no longer technically in the latter category, he spent a good chunk of his adult life in it, and he remains overweight to this day.

Chris seems to be in denial about his own obesity. His denial is evidenced by the fact that he portrays himself as [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|a slim, barrel-chested hero]] in his [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]] and in [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]], when he describes himself as "fit as a fiddle". Furthermore, in his numerous dating profiles discovered by the trolls, he often lists himself as having an "athletic build" or at the very least having weight that is proportionate to his height.

Another example of this was when he created a character for his comics named [[Sammy]], whom Chris stated is based off him when he "temporary [sic] gained weight, became stupid, and went to watch television at ghost command", even though he has always been this way. Except, y'know, for the Ghost Command part. But [[Chris and reality|that's]] a whole other problem.

Further cementing his obesity, on 2 [[October 2011]], Chris's voluptuous manboobs won an award on [http://web.archive.org/web/20111003142847/http://www.manboobs.co.uk/submissions/manboob_of_the_month manboobs.co.uk].

During the [[Jail Saga]], Chris notably shed a noticeable amount of weight, thanks to getting a degree of exercise while behind bars, and more importantly, [[Chris and nutrition|his jail diet]] consisting of ostensibly healthier food than what he could get in the drive-through, along with the amount of junk food that he could consume becoming limited by his commissary funds. In [[May 2022]], Chris's mugshot taken after returning to jail from [[Western State Hospital]] shows that he visibly lost weight since his arrest in [[August 2021]] to the point where he no longer has a a double-chin. Western State Hospital, unlike Central Virginia Regional Jail, does not have a commissary where he could supplement his jail diet with junk food and soft drinks.

The [[March 2023]] mugshot seen on his release from jail also made it look like he had still lost substantial weight despite being able to add empty calories to his diet again, as his jail uniform looked incredibly baggy. From [[May 2023]] onward, Chris initially looked like he kept some of that weight off [[Post-jail sightings (2023)|after he was spotted multiple times after leaving jail]], meaning that he was still in some of the best shape in a long time despite presumably resuming his unhealthy eating habits. However, later sightings indicated that he has since ballooned back to his former weight, or at least one very near it, notably regaining a lot of fat underneath his neck. This is most likely because, despite claiming to eat healtier, he still consumed the tried ol' formula of [[October 2023 social media posts#Chocolate and fruits|Hershey's covered fruits]] and [[Post-jail sightings (2023)#Walmart (October)|Banquet Meals]].

==Exercise==
[[File:Cwcspin.gif|thumb|left|Chris exercising.]]

Chris believes that ''standing up without moving'' is a legitimate form of exercise, and as such considers playing ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' a workout. During one of his [[PSN]] chats with Julie, when asked to exercise more, he replied, "I'll stand up more". It is not known how Chris came to believe that standing up is exercise, but it is most likely that Chris is simply extremely lazy and will lie to say that he works out every day, even though he just plays [[video games]]. It's possible he's picked it up from health tips that say standing burns more calories than sitting down,<ref>http://www.rd.com/living-healthy/8-ways-to-burn-calories-without-noticing/article16261.html ''Reader's Digest.'' See tip #3</ref><ref>http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/office-exercise/SM00115 ''Mayo Clinic.'' See tip #2</ref> but rather than use such tips to get the most out of an already busy lifestyle, he substitutes it for actual exercise altogether. It's also entirely possible he's in such terrible shape that the simple act of standing tires him as much as an actual workout would tire a normal human being.

[[File:Coke, Unicorn cosplay.jpg|thumb|150px|You know Chris didn't share that bottle with anyone.]]

[[Emily]] has said Chris power-walks around his neighborhood for thirty minutes and claims it's two miles (3 km), then claims to jog for two or three minutes every walk. She then went on to say Chris doesn't know how to jog — his idea of jogging is actually sprinting. It's safe to say he tries to run at "[[Sonic]] speed" for ten seconds, then resumes his leisurely waddle. This theory is confirmed in [[Sonichu's Edge]].

In [[Mailbag 21]], Chris claimed that he planned on investing in a gym membership. Judging by photographs and videos featuring his midsection from subsequent months, he either lied or wasted his money, only finally doing it [[Chris and health#Anytime Fitness|almost ten years later]].

In his [[Jail Letter - 8 November 2021 (RadioRabbit0)|letter to radiorabbit0]], he mentioned playing basketball to pass the time while awaiting court hearings, [[Jail Letter - 30 November 2021 (Eels and the Egg-man)|at least before he was forbidden from using the rec room]].

==Diet==

Another contribution to Chris' obesity is the food he eats. Chris's [[Chris and nutrition|diet]] is appalling, consisting mainly of fast food and other unhealthy foodstuffs. While it would be acceptable if he treated himself to that stuff occasionally (like most people do), there's no question that it's a staple of his diet. The sheer amount of calories he consumes, coupled with his laziness, means that he's carrying around enough extra mass to make another person. His diet will most likely also cause problems other than obesity, and may be the cause of his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal leakage]].
[[File:X - 28Oct2023-fruits3.jpg|thumb|150px|[[Chris and health|This is what Chris believes is a healthy meal.]]]]
In 2017, Chris decided that his ass wasn't fat enough, and began listening to a subliminal hypnosis track in the hopes of transferring his belly fat to his ass, as an attempt to obtain an hourglass figure.

During the [[Jail Saga]], Chris's diet consisted of the type of slop typically served in jail cafeterias, and occasionally commissary food if he'd earned it. It is unclear if Chris was a picky eater, but he shed a noticeable amount of weight during his extended stay in jail, likely due to a significant decrease in junk food available for him to consume. Post-jail sightings would see Chris quickly shedding his jailhouse physique, and by August of 2023, he would appear to be back to his normal state of obesity.

==Actual weight claims==
{{quote|Seriously, though, the last few times I looked on my smart scale of how much I weighed, without clothes, at above 210, I hopped off immediately without letting it sync with my Fitbit app. ALOL|Chris, January 2019<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1082811421363261441</ref>}}

[[File:Hypnosis for fatter ass.png|thumb|left|200px|Chris actually believes [[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis|binaural beats]] will [[Chris and reality|magically transform]] his fat gut and ass into an hourglass figure.]]

[[File:weightovertimev2.png|thumb|500px|A graph of Chris's (reported) weight over the years.]]

[[File:Burlesque1.jpg|thumb|200px|Chris's weight in [[June 2015]].]]

Modern measurement of whether someone is overweight or obese generally employs the [[Wikipedia:Body mass index|BMI]] system, which creates an index based on the height and weight of an individual. This system is by no means perfect; the readings tend to be inaccurately high for people who are exceptionally tall, have heavily set bodies or are very muscular, because these people have more bone or muscle weight than others. However, it is a very accurate system when applied to people of average height, bone structure and muscle build – which Chris is. Additionally, the distinction between overweightness and obesity is arbitrary, with different countries using different standards. For our purposes, a BMI of 25 and above is overweight, and a BMI of 30 and above is obese, which is the standard most widely used in the United States. If Chris were a Japanese citizen, he'd be obese with even a BMI of 25.

===Chris's height===

One of the two factors required to calculate BMI is height. For most of his adult life, Chris has claimed to be 5′ 10″ (178 cm),<ref>[[The Hook Cafe#Characteristics]]</ref> which is possible, but even at this height, his BMI would have almost never been under the "overweight" bracket since he began to record it in 2000. Given how readily [[List of Chris's Lies|Chris lies to serve himself]], he may be shorter, which would render his BMI in the "obese" range. In a [[26_December_2014#Police_Scanner_Video|police scanner report]] from 2014, he was described as being 5′ 9″ (1.75 m), and his [[List of cards from The Wall of Originals|custom ''Pokémon'' cards]] from 2000, 2002 and 2004 all give his "length" as 5′ 9″. As of 2021, Chris has taken to describing himself as 5′ 11″ (1.80 m),<ref>[[Jail Letter - 16 November 2021]]</ref> which is almost certainly a lie.

It is possible he may have begun describing himself as 5'10" around the time the [[love quest]] began, as a way to look more attractive to women. The earliest known reference to a 5'10" height appears on his [[match.com]] profile, created c. 2006. As late as 2004, however, he listed his ideal height for a potential girlfriend as between 5 foot to 5'9", indicating that Chris may have still been describing himself as 5'9" by then.<ref>[[CWC's Pokesite 2]]</ref>

For the sake of simplicity, the BMI data listed below is based on a height of 5′ 10″.

===Weight claims===
* 9 May 2000 - Chris's "Christian's Christian" [[List of cards from The Wall of Originals|custom Pokémon card]] gives his weight as '''185 pounds''' (84 kg).<ref>[[:File:099-CWCsCWC.jpg]]</ref> This would give him a BMI of 26.5, which is only slightly overweight.

* 25 March 2002 - Chris's "Dark Christian" [[List of cards from The Wall of Originals|custom Pokémon card]] gives his weight as '''185 pounds''' (84 kg).<ref>[[:File:100-DarkCWC.jpg]]</ref>

* 2 February 2004 - Chris's "Christian Chandler" [[List of cards from The Wall of Originals|custom Pokémon card]] gives his weight as '''165 pounds''' (75 kg),<ref>[[:File:098-CWCCard1.jpg]]</ref> the least he has claimed to weigh in his adult life. If this number is accurate, his BMI at the time would have been 23.7, putting him within the heavier end of the normal range and not overweight. However, since this is the first time Chris has reported his weight since the beginning of his [[Love Quest]], it is possible that he still weighed closer to 185 pounds and simply began lying about his weight to appear more attractive to the opposite sex.

* 20 July 2005 - In a [[Diary]] entry, Chris reported that his weight was '''180 pounds''' (about 80 kg),<ref>[[CWC's Diary#2005]]</ref> meaning that during that time his BMI was 25.8, which is slightly overweight.

* Fall 2009 - Chris told Kacey that his weight was somewhere between '''215 and 220 pounds''' (98–100 kg),<ref>[[Kacey Call 12]]</ref> meaning his BMI was between 30.8 and 31.6, nudging him into the obese range.

* Fall 2009 - In a later conversation with Kacey, Chris said that at a recent doctor's visit he had weighed in at '''205 pounds''' (93 kg), down from 216 the last time he had been there.<ref>[[Kacey Call 19]]</ref>

* February 2010 - Chris claimed to weigh "'''about 200 [pounds]'''" (91 kg), and also admitted to having once weighed more than 220 pounds (100 kg). Even if we interpret the words "about 200" to mean 190, his BMI at the time would still be 27.3, i.e. overweight, nearing obesity. He also claimed at this time that his goal was to get down to 180 pounds (82 kg).<ref>[[Mailbag 54#Fatty]]</ref>

* October 2010 - In the [[WeighIn|WeighIn video]], Chris claimed to weigh '''216 pounds''' (97 kg). This seems very unrealistic, given his apparent girth and food consumption. Most [[trolls|experts]] believe that Chris either offset his scale by 40 or 50 pounds, or that he did not fully stand on the scale in order to fool people into believing he's not extremely fat. It is also possible that Chris's years of inactivity had caused his muscles to deteriorate to the point that he looked like he weighed more than 250 pounds, when actually he was just 216 pounds of pure fat. Even if we assume that he indeed weighed only 216 lbs at the time, this would still put his BMI at 31, making him '''obese'''.

* April 2012 - Chris announced on Facebook that he was "going down to '''223''' <nowiki>[101 kg]</nowiki> and falling."<ref>[[April 2012 Facebook posts]]</ref>

[[File:Chris mugshot 27 March 2023.png|thumb|What Chris looked in [[March 2023]] after his jail diet.]]

* July 2013 - Chris again posted to Facebook that he was "down to '''220'''" (~100 kg).<ref>[[July 2013 Facebook Posts]]</ref>

* October 2013 - Just three months later, Chris told Facebook that according to his doctor's visit he weighed '''211 pounds''' (96 kg), and had lost seven pounds since last he checked.<ref>[[October 2013 Facebook Posts]]</ref>

* January 2014 - Chris asserted on Facebook that he weighed "'''about 202 pounds'''" (91 kg). While many would be quick to dismiss this solely on the basis that he eats at McDonald's regularly, at least one report shows that it can't be the sole factor, due to [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2533353/Forget-Super-Size-Me-Man-loses-37lbs-lowers-cholesterol-eating-McDonalds-three-months.html one individual actually ''losing weight'' on a pure McDonald's diet]. However, given the sheer deluge of fast/processed food Chris eats from other places, the non-existence of an exercise regimen, and the simple fact that his face is a lot fatter compared to previous photographs of him, this claim that he weighs 202 pounds is ''very'' dubious.<ref>[[January 2014 Facebook Posts]]</ref>

* October 2014 - Chris defensively told his friend Shaina that he weighed "'''around 200''' <nowiki>[91 kg]</nowiki>, give or take two or three."<ref>[[Open Relationship E-mails]]</ref>

* January 2018 - At [[MAGfest]], Chris said that he was '''"212 pounds of awesome"''' at the ''Christory of Sonichu'' panel.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/1-6-chris-at-magfest.38143/page-16#post-2931683</ref> Later, when he praised a fan who lifted him with a bear hug, Chris stated that his weight was more than 212 pounds, congratulating the fan on his strength.<ref>[[January 2018 tweets#Much love for MAGfest fans]]</ref>

* January 2019 - Chris self-consciously reported his weight at '''213 pounds''' (96 kg).<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1082809505367367680</ref> Three days later, Chris posted on Twitter data from his Aria 2 Smart Scale and Fitbit app that displayed his weight as '''209.7 pounds''' (95.1 kg) with his BMI listed as 29.4, nearly inside of the obese range.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1083935703698935808</ref> The readout from the smart scale also displayed Chris' Percent Body Fat as 45.3%, for comparison, PBF greater than 25% is considered obese for men while greater than 32% is obese for women. Chris stated that he wants to use his [[treadmill]] to slim down to 200 and eventually 179 pounds.

* November 2021 - Chris, after three months in jail, gave his weight as '''203 pounds''' (92 kg). Presumably this is due to the relatively low quality and low amount of food available to inmates. Chris described this weight as "appropriate to my Human Form's Five Foot, Eleven Inch Height", although with a BMI of 28.3 he is still very much overweight.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 16 November 2021]]</ref>

* January 2024 - Chris, nearly 10 months after being released, claimed to weigh '''215 pounds''' (97 kg) last time he checked on a scale, with his BMI listed as 30.8, rendering him into obese range again.<ref>[[Keffals_videos#The_Chris_Chan_Interview]]</ref>

==Health==
''Main article: [[Chris and health]]''

Obviously, all this has an adverse effect on Chris's health. Morbidly obese people are far more likely to develop diabetes, heart disease, and a number of other ailments. While it is admittedly possible to be both fat ''and'' fit at the same time, and an obese person can be very healthy in other regards (even living a long life), Chris's lifestyle, combined with ample evidence of his lack of physical prowess, means that this does not apply to him.

==Denial==
{{Quote|He's fat! Iiiiii'm thin!|Chris breaking out into chorus on [[Alec Benson Leary]]<ref>[[Christopher Paul Whitney reveal]]</ref>}}
[[Image:FattyLOL.jpg|thumb|180px|Horizontal stripes aren't exactly slimming!]]

Chris has generally been in denial about his weight. When a white knight once told him that he needed to lose some weight if he ever wanted to get a girlfriend, Chris responded by freaking out and exclaiming that he wasn't overweight.<ref>[[White knight E-mails#September 2008 .E2.80.94 Chris denies being fat and sexist]]</ref> In [[IRC]], Chris has been known to become very defensive about his weight, always making claims that he works out, when in fact he just stands up while playing ''Guitar Hero''. Chris's reaction to being called fat is precisely the same as his reaction to being called [[homos|gay]]. Unfortunately for Chris, there isn't a [[Homo#Defenses_against_becoming_homo|poster that will help him lose weight]]. He simply screams that he isn't fat, then oftentimes lies, and [[Chris and hypocrisy|calls the person accusing him fat.]] He exhibited this behavior during an email with [[Evan]],<ref>[[Masturbating_and_squirtin%27#Transcript of Chrisreply1evan.jpg|1st email to Evan]]</ref> during his phone call with [[Father Call|Kacey's father]], and especially in his conversation with [[Kacey and Liquid Call|Kacey and Liquid Chris]], where insults about his weight triggered a screaming rage.

However, during his original rivalry with [[Liquid Chris]], Chris once finally admitted he was perhaps maybe just a little bit fat, but only because he could use this as proof that he was the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler. A similar problem arose during the [[Asperchu]] saga, where Chris, in an attempt to prove that Asperchu was a parody of himself, was forced to admit that Asperchu's "Buddha belly" and "man boobs" are similar to his own. More specifically, he acts as though he ''used'' to have a sagging gut, even though he has, in fact, significantly gained weight since [[high school]]. He chose to focus on this aspect of Asperchu rather than admit his more embarrassing failures the series parodies. He did once admit in a [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|phone call]] with [[Jack Thaddeus]] that he was not fit.

There is also convincing evidence that [[autism|Chris has difficulty recognizing]] the human figure — [[Facial blindness|faces]] in particular. His consistent representation of himself as slender and athletic may be attributable to his having formed his self-image during high school, when he would spend hours studying his then-scrawnier self in the mirror, memorizing his looks. However, this is unlikely as Chris has probably never "spent hours studying" anything.<ref> [[Sonichu_7#Episode_16:_.22Time_Hogs.22|''Sonichu'' #7]] - "…I had to train my brain to visually remember what I looked like…"</ref>

Chris passed a kidney stone on July 9, 2017. According to the Mayo Clinic,<ref>http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/kidney-stones/symptoms-causes/dxc-20319562</ref> some causes of kidney stones include dehydration, certain diets that are rich in protein, sodium, and sugar, and being obese, which makes sense, seeing as Chris is fat, eats a lot of fast food, which is rich in sodium and sugar, and he commonly drinks soda over water, which unlike water, doesn't do well for hydration.

==In the comic==
[[File:SchuComic12-1P96.jpg|thumb|Fat Rosechu]]
Obesity in the ''Sonichu'' comic is largely limited to villains like [[Robotnik]] or the [[Jerkhief]] and comic relief like [[Sammy]], but [[Sonichu 12|''Sonichu'' #12]] contains a bizarre sequence in which [[Rosechu]] and [[Cera]] balloon up before later losing 200 pounds in two weeks. This was done to appeal to [[Jessica Quinn]], who had a fat fetish.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CLog_10042017_-_Q%26A_1#Question_12:_About_the_Rosechu_weight_gain</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_Facebook_posts#Quinn.27s_missing_out</ref>

==See also==
* [[Chris and health]]
* [[Muscle bra|Manboobs]]
* [[McDonald's]]
* [[Burger King]]
* [[List of restaurants]]

==References==
<references/>

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Health}}
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]

Rental House Tour

2024-04-28T22:58:10Z

LemonShade: /* Summary */

The '''Rental House Tour''' is the last in the series of events of 31 [[August 2014]], which had begun with the [[Catie Date Conversation Transcript]] and had continued with the [[IRL Tour of 14 Branchland Court]]. That afternoon, Chris, [[Catherine]], and her [[Cousin Al|cousin Al]] stopped by the [[Rental House]] to meet [[Barb]] and [[Clover and Snoopy|the beagles]]. Note that every time Catherine sneezes, it's an attempt to prevent Chris from putting his arm around her or kissing her.
[[File:Rental House June 2014.jpg|thumb|right|250px|The rental house.]]

==Summary==
* Chris shows them his [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013|Lego version of Manchester High]] and some little figures of [[Catherine]] and himself.
* They find that Chris has a picture of Catherine on his night stand.
* Chris confirms that all of his [[PlayStation 3]] [[Video games|games]] have survived the [[Destruction Of Chris's House|fire]].
* Chris shows off his [[High School]] yearbook and talks about each of his [[gal-pals]].
* Chris talks about his [[Clover and Snoopy|dogs]], who are horribly trained and cared for and who go berserk if they see someone they don't recognise.
* Chris and [[Barb]] talk a little about [[Daniel Weston|Richard Weston]].
* Barb tells the story about how [[Cole Smithey|Cole]] almost died of an infection.
* Barb explains how they're British royalty.
* The background music, which appears to consist of orchestral versions of [[Beatles]] songs and other 50s/60s hits, lends the entire exchange an air of classic Hollywood melodrama, as if Katharine Hepburn were about to slap someone or burst into tears at any moment.

==Part One==
===Audio===
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Rental House Tour Audio Part One
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|ssLj-FCmtss}}
| Stardate = 31 [[August 2014]]
| Featuring = [[Chris]], [[Catherine]], Al, [[Barb]], [[Clover and Snoopy]]
| Saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}, {{Catherine|text}}, {{Sonic Boom|text}}
| previous = [[IRL Tour of 14 Branchland Court|14BC Tour Video]]
| next = Rental House Tour Audio Part One
}}
===Transcript===
====Introductions====

'''Al''': Hey Chris!

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Is it alright if I park right there?

'''Chris''': That’s fine.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': You’re OK. Don’t worry about it.

'''Al''': Damn, this is a…

'''Catherine''': Yeah, you don't wanna get...[?]

'''Al''': Yeah, this is a nice place.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': It’s a nice little neighborhood.

'''Chris''': It’s two stories but only about two-thirds of the width.

'''Al''': Yeah. So you’ve been livin’ here since when?

'''Chris''': Eh, since last February.

'''Al''': Oh.

'''Chris''': [entering house] Hello!

'''Al''': Howdy.

'''Chris''': [[Clover and Snoopy|Hi Snoopy! Hi Clover!]] Hi mom.

'''Al''': Howdy.

'''Barb''': Hi.

'''Chris''': Um, Barbara Anne, this is, this is…

'''Catherine''': Nice to meet you.

'''Chris''': That’s Catherine and her cousin Al.

'''Al''': Glad to meet ya. I’m Big Al.
[[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|thumb|200px|right|They're a lot fatter now.]]
'''(one or more of the dogs start baying)'''

'''Catherine''': They're lovely, too... [?]

'''Dog:''' AROOOOOOOO!

'''Chris''': Oh…

'''Dog:''' AROOOOOO!

'''Chris''': Snoopy…

'''Al''': There’s some, yeah they seem a little bit worked up there.

'''Chris''': Yeah, that’s Snoopy, and that’s Clover.

'''Catherine''': Strangers in their house.

'''Al''': Well howdy Snoopy, howdy Clover.

'''Barb''': They’re part fox.

'''Chris''': Huh huh!

'''Catherine''': They are cute.

'''Al''': Oh, no kiddin’.

'''Catherine''' I love dogs, so (phone rings) I've gotta...

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Dog:''' Bark!

'''Catherine''': Alright, we’ll let you…

'''Al''': Yeah, we’ll let you get to…

'''Dog:''' AROOOOO! AROOOOOO! AROOOOOO!

'''Chris''': …the door.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': Ah, thank you.

'''Chris''': Yeah. Oh, actually and I had also got you a case…

'''Dog:''' AROOOOOO! AROOOOOOO! AROOOOOOO! AROOO!

[chaos]

'''Al''': OK, OK.

'''Chris''': Anyway, [?].

'''Al''': Don’t bite me!

'''Catherine''': Oh, thank you.

'''Chris''': Yeah, and I…

'''Dog:''' AROOOOOO!

'''Al''': Hold the last one.

'''Catherine''': I really need. [?]

'''Al''': They seem pretty loud.

'''Chris''': Yeah, they get loud, when there’s new people.

====Touring Chris's playroom====

'''Al''': Aw, cool! Dude, is this your room?

'''Chris''': Yeah, that’s my work room.

'''Al''': Can I go in for a moment?

'''Chris''': Yeah. Sure.

'''Dog:''' AROOOOO!

'''Chris''': Hey now, doggies, calm down! That’s good. [To Al]: I had to pretty much prepare for Catherine’s staying over for a while longer at least. I had a second, I had, I made room for a second ''chair''.

'''Al''': So, so what is all this then?

'''Chris''': Yeah, pretty much some random things, but that’s a high school I built based on the one from Heartlake High. I dedicated building that to [[Manchester High School|Manchester High]]. Took me about a ''month'' to build that.
[[File:Rebuilths3.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's Lego high school as it appeared in the rental house.]]
'''Dog:''' AROOOOO!

'''Al''': Really.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Well see Chris, you have, you spent a month to build that?

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Well see, that’s dedication right there.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': With your [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]] and stuff, you can do the same thing, if you can be dedicated. Like if you can work on that for a month…

'''Chris''': Yeah...

'''Al''': …you can spend a month working on a comic book.

'''Chris''': Yeah. [Wants to change the subject] Anyway, yeah, I built this house on multiple houses. And here’s our minifigs, me and Catherine.

'''Al''': Awww.

'''Chris''': Yeah, I pain-, I painted a kilt on her.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': Yeah, it’s a [[Lego]] head on a…

'''Al''': Oh, so that’s like the little kilt right there then?

'''Chris''': Uh, it’s like a…

'''Al''': Is that like bubblegum or…?

'''Chris''': That’s denim skirt.

'''Al''': Oh. Oh.

'''Chris''': Yeah but, I used paper to make that.

'''Al''': Neat, yeah, and that’s little Catie. What’s that around her neck, is that like a little medallion, or…?

'''Chris''': Yeah. [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] [[medallion]]. Uh, on my [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]], I eventually would give them.

'''Al''': Oh. Cool.

'''Chris''': And custom minifigures of the hedgehogs.

'''Al''': So did you make those yourself then?

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': So you seem to have an interest in arts and crafts, then.

'''Chris''': Yes.

'''Al''': Neat. So what’s…

[Catherine enters]

'''Chris''': [cloying voice] Yeah, that’s you.

'''Catherine''': Is that me? Oh that’s even tinier than I thought. Oh that’s so cute.

'''Chris''': And here, and here I am.

'''Catherine''': Oh, they’re cute. [giggles] That’s so cute. There you go.

'''Al''': [Feigning awe] Dude.

'''Catherine''': Wow, you’ve got a lot of [[Lego]]. I didn’t realize you had that much.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': So, what, what’s in this case right here, is this…?

'''Chris''': Oh that’s my medicine case. It’s got my [[Chris and health|prescription medicine]]…

'''Al''': Oh.

'''Catherine''': [?]

'''Al''': Yeah, yeah.

'''Chris''': Yeah, too bad you’re not staying, we could have watched [[Wikipedia:Gigi (1958 film)|Gigi]].

'''Catherine''': Yeah I’m sorry, we’ve got to get out of here.

====Next stop: the bedroom====

'''Chris''': Yeah. Uh, at least let me show you the uh, my bedroom. It is right there.

'''Catherine''': So, you go right ahead.

'''Al''': So this is sort of like your office, then?

'''Chris''': Yeah, kind of. Yeah. Here’s where I sleep.

'''Catherine''': Oh it’s a nice room. Wow, it’s a Skylanders.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': There’s a lot, how many…? [counting?]

'''Al''': Catie, can I take a look for a mom-?

'''Catherine''': [joking] No, you can’t.

[Al and Catherine goof around]

[Elevator music starts up]

'''Catherine''': Wow.

'''Al''': Oh you have a nice set up in here, man.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': So is this your TV then?

'''Chris''': Uh, that’s, yeah, that’s a 3D TV, from Sony. [[Playstation]].

'''Al''': Dude, you got a lot of PS3 [[Video games|games]]!

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Did these survive [[Destruction Of Chris's House|the fire]], or…?

'''Chris''': Yes, they all did. Every last one.

'''Catherine''': Oh that’s fortunate.

'''Al''': Oh that’s good, yeah.

'''Chris''': Yeah. Oh…

'''Al''': So do you have…?

'''Chris''': …do you happen to have an interest in video discs as well?

'''Al''': Dude, those things are so old - do you collect those?

'''Chris''': Uh…

'''Al''': Have you had those ever since…?

'''Chris''': We had these, we had these a lo-, pretty much all my life.

'''Al''': Oh, Catie, take a look at the night stand there!

'''Chris''': Yeah, this is pretty much our entire collection of…

'''Catherine''': [Slightly horrified] Oh, I didn’t realize you kept my picture on your night stand. Oh wait, I think you did tell me that.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': You kept my picture on your night stand. That’s so cute...

'''Al''': So what game system do you got, is that, uh, Sega…?

'''Chris''': Sega Dreamcast.

'''Catherine''': Oh I remember that…

'''Al''': And who’s that?

'''Chris''': That’s [[Robert Chandler|my father]].

'''Al''': Oh.

'''Chris''': That’s Mr. C right there.

'''Al''': So you keep that there too?

'''Chris''': That’s Catherine and Mr. C.

'''Catherine''': Do you think he would approve of me?

'''Chris''': How do you feel?

'''Catherine''': I like to think so.

'''Chris''': And that, then I think he does.

'''Catherine''': He see-, he seems a little bit… interested in your best program here. [?]

====High school reminisces====

[music swells]

'''Chris''': Yeah. Yeah. Yeah that’s uh, I ended up with two copies of the senior yearbook.

'''Al''': Why two copies?

'''Chris''': Uh, uh, I think it’s because, uh, well, wound up, separate purchases, I think.

'''Al''': Oh. So somebody like, filled out a form wrong or something?

'''Chris''': Yeah, I think so.

'''Al''': So who were your [[gal-pals]] then, that you were talking about in high school? Were they, are they in here, or…?

'''Chris''': Yeah, they’re in, they’re in there, mostly, uh…

'''Al''': Now did this get water damaged during the fire?

'''Chris''': Um…

'''Catherine''': Put in the fire.

'''Al''': It seems like the pages are a little bit wrinkled, or…?

'''Chris''': Yeah, yeah, I think that one did get some water damage.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': You might have better luck with this copy which is only smoke-damaged.

'''Al''': Yeah. Did they, so the insurance company, are they compensating you for all this damage? Cuz like…

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': …when stuff like this gets damaged, it’s priceless, you know? I mean…

'''Catherine''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': Yeah. Oh yeah, I bookmarked the beginning of the ''senior'' section there.

'''Al''': Aw, did they, did they sign your yearbook at all?

'''Chris''': Um…Oh I might not have thought about it.

'''Al''': Yeah, there’s some people…

'''Chris''': Yeah plus we didn’t, I don’t think we got these yearbooks till ''after'' [[graduation]].

'''Catherine''': Oh that’s unusual.

'''Al''': Oh that sucks.

'''Catherine''': So where are you in here?

'''Al''': Which one is your gal-pal then?

'''Chris''': Um, there’s a number of them, uh let’s see, [flipping through yearbook]…There I am.
[[File:ChrisChanY2K.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's yearbook photo.]]
'''Catherine''': Oh, there we go.

'''Al''': Oh!

'''Catherine''': In a little tuxedo.

'''Al''': Yeah see, I like it man, you look very…

'''Catherine''': Very smart.

'''Al''': You know, you know what you remind me of there?

'''Chris''': Who?

'''Al''': You should, you should, you know like Frank Sinatra, one of those old singers.

'''Chris''': Oh, [[Chris and music|I like Frank Sinatra]].

'''Al''': That, that would go on stage, and he’d talk, and the smooth voice and he’d talk to the ladies…

'''Chris''': [takes on persona] Good evening ladies and gentlemen!

'''Al''': Yeah, yeah!

'''Chris''': We’ve really got a big show for you tonight!

'''Catherine''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Yeah, like from one of those, uh, old black-and-white movies, you know? But yeah, you look smooth and classy, man.

'''Chris''': Yeah. Oh uh, [[Kellie Andes]], uh, was my high school s-, sweetheart that I fell in big like with…

'''Al''': So, so which one is she?

'''Chris''': [spelling] A…A L E, um, yeah.

'''Al''': This says Kellie Lynn Andes right there.

'''Chris''': Yeah. Yeah.

'''Al''': Oh, that one?

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': Can I have a look?

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': Oh, she’s very pretty.

'''Al''': Yeah. Well not as pretty as you, right Catie? Right Chris?

'''Chris''': No, she’s…

'''Catherine''': [laughs] Did you just call him Catie?

'''Chris''': [chuckles]

'''Al''': Oh I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

'''Catherine''': I have to sneeze again, sorry.

'''Al''': I’m a little big dyslexic myself. Sometimes I mix up words and stuff.

'''Chris''': Uh, well.

'''Al''': I say something when I mean to say something else. So.

'''Catherine''': [Sneezes] Excuse me.

'''Chris''': [spelling] C B B…

'''Catherine''': Must have caught a cold on the plane.

'''Chris''': Oh I hope not.

'''Catherine''': It happens all the time. Every time you travel.

'''Chris''': [browsing] Oh and, it's B E V... … Oh shoot, [trails off]. Oh, Sarah Bev-, [[Gal pal#Sarah Anne Bevel|Sarah Bevel]].

'''Al''': Oh that, that one right there.

'''Catherine''': Oh she’s very pretty too.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': You have lots of pretty friends, haven’t you?

'''Chris''': [Smugly] Eh, yeah.

'''Al''': Dude, you gotta go back to whatever it was you were doing back then, you got all the girls. Well I mean you have Catie now, so I mean…

'''Chris''': Yeah, I’d rather, I’d rather stick with a winner.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': It’s good to be a winner, I think?

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': Hm, G O… Tiff-, there she is. [[Tiffany Gowen]].

'''Al''': Yeah right there, the blonde at the bottom...

'''Catherine''': She looks a little bit like, em, Cameron Diaz.

'''Al''': Yeah, yeah.

'''Catherine''': I think it’s the hair, but she does look a little bit like Cameron Diaz.

'''Al''': Do you have any [[JERKS|guys]] that you hung out with back in high school, or…?

'''Chris''': Uh,…

'''Catherine''': Or was it mostly girls?

'''Chris''': Not, not, it was mostly girls.

'''Al''': Mostly girls?

'''Chris''': Yeah. I did have, uh, [[Joseph Herring|one]], um, uh, I hung out with in my freshman year when I was vars-, when I was, uh, co-water boy/manager of the [[Manchester High School#Go Lancers!|varsity basketball team]].

'''Al''': So wait, you were manager of the basketball team?

'''Chris''': Yeah, varsity.

'''Al''': That’s pretty cool.

'''Catherine''': Thank you.

'''Al''': Hey, is this the bathroom?

'''Chris''': Oh yeah.

'''Al''': Yeah, you mind if I take a leak real quick?

'''Chris''': Go ahead.

'''Al''': Yeah, hey Catie, I’ll get here and then I’ll go downstairs and join up with you guys, so.

'''Catherine''': Alright.

'''Al''': I’ll be out in just a minute.

==Part Two==
===Audio===

{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Rental House Tour Audio Part Two
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|pepLdYwk3Wk}}
| Stardate = 31 [[August 2014]]
| Featuring = [[Chris]], [[Catherine]], Al, [[Barb]], [[Clover and Snoopy]]
| Saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}, {{Catherine|text}}, {{Sonic Boom|text}}
| previous = Rental House Tour Audio Part One
| next =
}}

===Transcript===
====Chatting with Barb====

[toilet flushes]

[sink runs]

[door squeaks open]

[20th Century orchestral music is heard]

'''Al''': Hello.

'''Catherine''': [Oh watch?]

'''Al''': Oh, are they gonna eat me alive now, or…?

'''Chris''': [unintelligible] he wants to buy a bunch of ours.

'''Al''': Yeah, the uh, vinyl records y’all got, I collect them, so.

'''Barb''': You can go through 'em.

'''Al''': Sure.

'''Catherine''': ...'Cuz I know you loved your records.

'''Barb''': Right now they’re all in a tractor-trailer.

'''Al''': In a tractor-trailer?

'''Chris''': Not really, no, they’re in a storage unit or downstairs.

'''Barb''': They’re not downstairs.

'''Chris''': Oh, oh.

'''Barb''': I put ‘em on a tractor-trailer.

'''Chris''': Oh, OK, well I guess, when the Rainbow cleaners, some of them got taken to their facility. Well not all of them, there was a bunch of them at the s-, at the unit.

'''Barb''': Oh.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': At your storage unit?

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': Oh, OK.

'''Chris''': [to dog] Oh, hi baby girl. He’s a kisser. [baby voice] He likes to kiss.

'''Catherine''': They’re so cute. I’m sure they’ll get used to me eventually.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': They just don’t know who I am or why I’m in their house!

'''Chris''': Snoopy, Clover, that’s Catherine. Catie. You saw her picture?

'''Catherine''': [giggles] You showed your dogs my picture? That’s so cute.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': They like the picture or what, or…?

'''Chris''': Uh well, they sniffed it. They smell everything.

'''Catherine''': That's the ticket.

'''Chris''': Yeah, they got, we got separate to pee and poo on the paper.

'''Catherine''': Yeah, try not…

'''Chris''': On the black thing.

'''Catherine''': …to stand on it.

'''Al''': Yeah. They what? Oh, yeah, I guess that makes sense then, on the paper…

'''Catherine''': Try not to stand on it or anything.

'''Barb''': It’s, it’s awfully inconvenient to take them outside and have to pick it up.

'''Al''': Yeah. Yeah.

'''Barb''': I’d rather have it inside, to pick it up.

'''Al''': Oh yeah, and then it’s closer so you can clean it up without going as far away.

'''Barb''': I’m 72 years old, and I don’t.

'''Catherine''': Fair enough.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': You’ve worked enough in your life, so…

'''Chris''': Yeah. I told, I told mom about, uh, how you have a lot of interesting stories from your travels in the European Brish - British areas.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': Hey mother, tell her, tell her something about the Weston name. Or some of it.

'''Barb''': 400 years ago, the king declared the name [[Daniel Weston|Weston]], W-E-S-T-O-N, not I-N or E-N, but O-N, to be part of England’s [[Anne Boleyn|royalty]] forever.

'''Catherine''': That’s interesting.

'''Barb''': So Christian…

'''Catherine''': There’s a lot of uh, there’s a lot of names like that in England, and um… Well you go, you go back through the um, the old records and stuff and you see…

'''Barb''': Well my cousin…

'''Catherine''': …lordships, and you see…

'''Barb''': Well my cousin was the one that put together a pilgrimage…

'''Catherine''': Wow. That’s a piece of history right there.

'''Al''': It certainly seems, Christian seems like a pretty good son. He was talking about how he helps you out around the house and all, and such.

'''Barb''': Oh my gosh.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': I couldn’t, I couldn’t survive without him.

'''Catherine''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Yeah. Well I hope he takes care of Catie just as well. So.

'''Chris''': I’m pretty sur-, I’m fairly confident I will. I had practice.

'''Barb''': [cackles] He’s had a lot of practice. His father died three years ago.

[Music actually switches to a sadder tone]

'''Catherine''': I know. We heard. I’m terribly sorry.

'''Al''': Yeah. Sorry. I apologize for your loss. That’s gotta suck. So.

'''Barb''': Yeah. Yeah you, you never get over it.

'''Catherine''': Not really, no.

'''Barb''': My sister and…[?] um, her husband…

'''Chris''': Yes, yeah, [[Minor Family Members#Aunt Harriet and Uncle Tom|Harriet and Tom]].

'''Barb''': …had to have surgery on this area.

'''Catherine''': Oh, that’s terrible. Oh, poor doggie.

'''Barb''': He has a growth that’s blocking the flow of whatever fluids, and as a result, it’s causing constant infection.

'''Catherine''': Oh that’s awful.

'''Al''': Sounds awful.

'''Barb''': So, he’s gonna get operated on at the end of September.

'''Al''': In September?

'''Barb''': I, I wonder if it’s life-threatening, cause this area here…

'''Chris''': They didn’t mention that.

'''Barb''': …there’s a hole in the brain right there.

'''Catherine''': Well that’s…

'''Al''': A hole in the brain?

'''Barb''': There’s a hole that goes right in the brain. My oldest son, um…

'''Chris''': [[Cole]].

'''Barb''': …almost died from a sinus infection, in California…

'''Chris''': I didn’t hear this one.

'''Catherine''': Oh my goodness.

'''Barb''': …shortly after he went out there to college. He - he had a sinus infection.

'''Catherine''': That’s awful.

'''Barb''': And he couldn’t - couldn’t shake it.

'''Catherine''': I’m so sorry.

'''Barb''': He um - so he went to the doctor, and the doctor said "you’re just in time".

'''Catherine''': Well that’s good.

'''Barb''': For a few hours. He wouldn’t’ve made it a few hours... [?]

'''Catherine''': Wow. That was…let’s see…

'''Barb''': That’s when I really learned…

'''Catherine''': …when he first went to college, so he would, he would have been about eighteen, nineteen?

'''Barb''': Yeah, he was about nineteen.

'''Catherine''': I don’t, I have no idea how old he is now, so I don’t know how long ago that would have been.

'''Barb''': He’s, yeah he was born in ’63.

'''Catherine''': OK.

'''Barb''': And Christian was born in ’82.

'''Chris''': Uh, 40, 51.

'''Barb''': ’82. I bought mailbox numbers 63 and 82.

'''Catherine''': Mm hmm.

'''Al''': Oh!

'''Barb''': I had trouble, I had trouble remembering it and I started…

'''Al''': Well that’s a good trick.

'''Catherine''': Well that’s handy.

'''Chris''': Yeah, we like number games as well as word games.

'''Catherine''': Oh that’s lovely.

'''Chris''': Yeah, hey, tell ‘em your anniversary date. Or wedding.

'''Barb''': 6-7-80.

'''Catherine''': 6-7-80, that’s easy to remember.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': My husband and I got married, we were married 31 years.

'''Catherine''': That’s a long while.

'''Barb''': And um, two months after we were married, he had triple bypasses, and the doctors told me that he would not have lived two more weeks.

'''Catherine''': Wow.

'''Barb''': If he hadn’t had…and if he hadn’t had married me he’d never’ve known.

'''Catherine''': Cause you made him go to the doctor.

'''Barb''': It was very suddenly. Because he was, uh, an engineer at GE and he did hard core negotiating to sell their products.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': To sell their products. So.

'''Catherine''': (to Snoopy) Oh, I'm not me. Do you want to smell me?

'''Barb''': It wasn’t easy…

'''Dog:''' AROOOOOO!

'''Chris''': Snoopy, calm down.

'''Catherine''' Alright, fair enough.

'''Chris''': Calm down, little boy, calm down. I think they’re probably easier if uh, if I was sitting down.

'''Al''': Yeah, I don’t know if we have much room here.

'''Chris''': It was…

'''Catherine''': We can’t stay too terribly long.

'''Al''': Yeah we’re gonna head out in a few minutes anyways, so…

====The fire and its consequences====

'''Barb''': The couch belongs to the dogs. They saved us from the fire.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': Yeah, Christian said they woke you up.

'''Chris''': Yeah, they woke me up, then I woke her up.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': I got, I burned both feet, because I didn’t have any shoes on.

'''Al''': You had to walk through the fire then?

'''Barb''': Well I had to extinguish it, try to put it out, and what happened was, uh…

'''Chris''': More over on... [?]

'''Barb''': The flecks from the... insulation... in the wall.

'''Al''': The flecks from the insul-, like, they were drop-, pieces of insulation were dropping down?

'''Barb''': Yes.

'''Al''': And they burnt you on the foot?

'''Barb''': I on the bottom, I stepped on them.

'''Chris''': Um, well OK, I didn’t hear that. I thought, I thought the worst damage to your feet was from you had to walk all over that wet grass cause it was raining that morning.

'''Barb''': Well I didn’t know that I had damaged my feet…

'''Chris''': Oh. [stress sigh]

'''Barb''': …until later.

'''Al''': So you saw the fire, you grabbed an extinguisher, you’re lucky you had one on hand.

'''Barb''': He grabbed an extinguisher, pulled the thing out, and handed it to me.

'''Chris''': I remember from training, you know, you pull the pin first.

'''Catherine''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': And then you handed it off to your mum.

'''Al''': Sounds like you were both pretty brave to fight the fire like that.

'''Barb''': We didn’t have any choice. I had to hold, I was able to hold it just long enough for him to get his head together, take the dogs and the cat, and uh, we got out.

'''Chris''': Actually our cat [[Chandler Cats#Lucy|Lucy]] came to us. She was upstairs.

'''Barb''': Was she?

'''Chris''': Yeah, you remember, she came downstairs and met us, and then she ran out of [[14 Branchland Court|the house]] with us.

'''Barb''': That’s right, she did.

'''Chris''': Yeah I put the leads on the dogs.

'''Catherine''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': You’re all very lucky to have gotten out of that.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': I’m so sorry for your loss.

'''Barb''': That’s OK, it hasn’t been totally bad.

'''Al''': Things happen, life happens, you know?

'''Barb''': I think for a reason.

'''Al''': You just get through it, so.

'''Barb''': I think for a reason.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': Yeah, we’ve learned a lot. [Laughs] Yeah, we did some hardcore negotiating, with uh, State Farm.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': Excuse me just a moment.

'''Al''': Uh yeah, sorry. Yep, yep, get through there…

'''Catherine''': …in your way.

'''Al''': Hard core negotiating, what, they didn’t wanna pay out or somethin’, or…?

'''Barb''': They don’t…the adjustor is a woman, and she hates the ground I walk on. She dislikes me terribly, cause I’m too old and too smart. See I’m not the typical 72-year-old woman.

====Barb and Catie talk sewing====

'''Chris''': Yeah I’ll just remember it and I’ll save it.

'''Al''': Um…

'''Catherine''': He uses that for work. Pretty much.

'''Al''': Yeah, that’s mostly a work phone, I wouldn’t want people, but you can contact me through Catie.

'''Chris''': OK.

'''Catherine''': Yeah. It's- it's- we’re always in touch.

'''Chris''': OK, so you know I should contact him on the inquir- inquiry about the records.

'''Catherine''': Uh, you can al- you can always let me know and I’ll pass the message.

'''Barb''': I appreciate you driving her there.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': That was a good security move.

'''Al''': Well her phone, [Catherine: “Car.”] her car broke down, so there was hardly any choice, I was the only guy who could, so.

'''Catherine''': Yeah, so.

'''Al''': But yeah.

'''Barb''': Well, it was good security.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': Yeah, yeah everything…

'''Al''': Yeah, yeah, I mean, I didn’t, I didn’t know Christian or anything, I hadn’t met you all at all, and they were talkin’ pretty serious, like it seemed, so I thought I would get to know your family as well, cause if these two were gonna get hitched, it’s gonna be one family, so.

'''Barb''': You’re just as beautiful as he said.

'''Catherine''': Oh thank you. You’re very sweet.

'''Al''': Yeah, so.

'''Barb''': Yeah, you are. You are.

'''Catherine''': Thank you.

'''Barb''': I understand you sew a little bit?

'''Catherine''': A little bit, not very much. Um, basically just enough to put, like, a button on my shirt, or, or um, like, stitch up my pants.

'''Barb''': I have a trainload of [felt?].

'''Catherine''': Oh, I’m terribly sorry.

'''Chris''': Well, [drowned out]

'''Al''': Christian said you used to sew, or you sew occasionally…?

'''Barb''': I used to. I’m, I’m going to, after I get settled back in the house.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': I’m gonna start designing and sewing.

'''Catherine''': Mm hmm.

'''Chris''': Yeah. I told, I told her about the A-skirts you put together.

'''Catherine''': Oh yeah, you can make an A-line skirt out of an old pair of jeans. You just cut um, you, you rip the side, the seams in the middle, and then you use the leg to cut it off about here, and you use the legs to make the panels.

'''Chris''': It's easy to do.

'''Catherine''': And it works very well. It’s very easy. It’s just you need a sewing machine to do it.

'''Barb''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': But you could sew it by hand, but it takes ages.

'''Chris''': Hm. [Bizarrely inflected] She can sew more than a '''button'''.

'''Al''': Yeah. Alright.

'''Catherine''': Well, I mean…

'''Barb''': I taught my oldest son to sew, when he was growing up.

'''Catherine''': My roommate knits. My roommate is from Texas and he knits.

'''Barb''': Every, every boy needs to know how to sew and how to cook.

'''Catherine''': Exactly. Cause you’re not gonna have a woman all the time. Makes you self-sufficient.

'''Barb''': Hey, what if a woman can't cook for kids, so…

'''Catherine''': Exactly.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': [?]

'''Catherine''': Mm hmm.

====Barb's family heritage====

'''Barb''': In my family, I was the, I was number one as far as, there were eight children, five girls, and uh, um…

'''Al''': You were the eldest? You had to take care of the rest?

'''Barb''': I was five, number five of eight.

'''Al''': Ah.

'''Catherine''': Oh, so you were almost in the middle.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': Yeah, I had a, I had a good spot.

'''Catherine''': Mm hmm.

'''Barb''': I had to fight both ways.

'''Catherine''': [Laughs]

'''Barb''': I had to change diapers both ways. [Laughs]

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': Well I had two sisters and a brother younger than me. I have s- one [[Minor Family Members#Aunt Harriet and Uncle Tom|sister]] and [[Minor Family Members#Uncle Raymond|brother]] still with us, and it’s nice. I just talked to her last night.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': Well I think I uh, told Catie about how Barbara Anne wanted to be an English teacher...? Enjoyed some English literature I think?

'''Barb''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': Yeah, I enjoy literature.

'''Chris''': Yeah. She likes a lot of Shakespe'''ah'''.

'''Catherine''': Yeah, I do like Shakespeare.

'''Chris''': She also enjoys The Tudors, uh, HBO program through Netflix, all about King Henry VIII.

'''Barb''': Oh, Henry VIII. [[Anne Boleyn]], his wife…

'''Catherine''': One of, yeah, one of six.

'''Barb''': Well, she couldn’t produce a boy.

'''Catherine''': Mm hmm.

'''Barb''': So he killed her.

'''Catherine''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': But he drummed up all these excuses that the maids helped him to put together.

'''Catherine''': Yeah. Well he was the king, he could say whatever he wanted about anybody, and they wouldn’t dare say no, it’s not right. So.

'''Barb''': Yeah. He was just a murderer.

'''Catherine''': Mm. A little bit.

'''Barb''': The first, the first Queen Elizabeth was her daughter.

'''Catherine''': Mm hmm.

'''Barb''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': That was uh, the last of the Tudors.

'''Barb''': We’re blood kin to them. I suppose we got blood kin to every Wes-, blood Weston in the world.

'''Catherine''': That would be an interesting thing to research, like go through old records and things like that, and actually draw a line and be able to say, this is exactly where that went.

'''Chris''': I still don’t know the missing link between Richard Weston and Mary Boleyn.

'''Catherine''': Well Weston’s not exactly an uncommon name in Britain. I mean it’s not super-common, it’s not like Smith or anything, but there are a lot of people with that name.

'''Barb''': I suppose there are. There are.

'''Chris''': Oh, and I uh…

'''Barb''': You’ve done a lot of important things in the, 400...

'''Catherine''': 400 odd years, yeah, done a lot of things and made a lot of children.

'''Chris''': Oh yeah, in our thinking ahead, I did mention to her that uh, I promised you [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|our first daughter]] would have the middle name Weston.

'''Barb''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': So to continue that tradition. And royalty.

'''Barb''': [?]

'''Catherine''': It does.

'''Barb''': So, you’re part Scottish?

'''Catherine''': Yeah, on my mother’s side. My mom’s Scottish and my dad’s Italian.

'''Barb''': Our biggest [?] combination.

'''Catherine''': It’s an interesting one.

'''Barb''': Yeah, it is.

====Time to go====

'''Dog:''' AROOOOOOO.

'''Chris''': Ah, Snoopy, calm down.

'''Barb''': Calm down. [Laughs]

'''Chris''': Yeah. They’re visiting right now, but I’m thinking she’ll be good more often.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': And y’all can get to know her, and I, they let me sit between them and hug them.

'''Catherine''': Oh that’s nice.

'''Chris''': They’re so sweet like, they’re so sweet like that, in other ways.

'''Barb''': Yeah, they’re good dogs, they really are.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': They’re very, very protective.

'''Catherine''': Beagles usually are. They’re very, they like their families. They like to be very protective of their... Their pack.

'''Al''': Yeah. Well anyway, uh, I, I’m Catie’s ride, and I got some stuff to do, so…

'''Barb''': Yeah.

'''Al''': So probably should be heading out, yeah.

'''Catherine''': Nice meeting you.

'''Barb''': Nice meeting you too.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': I look forward to seeing you again.

'''Catherine''': Certainly.

'''Al''': Yeah. And that, and this is like, we just went out to eat, and we just dropped in unannounced, and we don’t wanna, yeah we won’t take up too much, too much time. Good meeting you, Mrs. Chandler.

'''Chris''': Partially, partially, partially unannounced, because I had thought about bringing ''her'' over here anyway.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Chris''': At least to meet her, and, you know, watch Gigi, but we couldn’t do that, [Catherine sneezes.] cause um, cause your car’s in the shop. Oh bless you.

'''Catherine''': Excuse me. Thank you. I must, I must have caught cold on the plane.

'''Chris''': I hope not.

'''Catherine''': It happens to me every time I fly. You’ve got 200-odd people in one little little tiny plane for about an hour.

'''Barb''': Is it a long flight?

'''Catherine''': Yeah, I have to fly to Chicago, and then catch another flight, so.

'''Chris''': Well cool, I’ll…

'''Barb''': [something about Cole] ...I took him to San Francisco, California when he was about seven years old.

'''Catherine''': Yeah. That’s a long flight. I think that’s about, what is that, five hours?

'''Barb''': I don’t quite remember [?] [Laughs]

'''Catherine''': Yeah, but it’s a long flight.

'''Barb''': It was painful. It was painful.

'''Catherine''': Yeah. You get stuck in an airplane, you get all that air recycled. There’s somebody gets sick, it happens to me all the time.

'''Barb''': Yeah it does.

'''Catherine''': I’ll probably be fine in a few days.

'''Chris''': If not there’s always chicken noodle soup.

'''Catherine''': Yeah, definitely.

'''Chris''': They like chicken noodle soup. They’ve had some! [baby voice] Chicken noodle soup. Wasn’t that good, doggies? Yeah.

'''Barb''': Anything with chicken in it…. Well, we’ll let you go now.

'''Al''': Yeah.

'''Catherine''': Alright, thank you for, thank you for your hospitality.

'''Al''': Yep. Nice place. Nice place y'all got here, so.

'''Catherine''': [unintelligible] over there.

'''Chris''': OK, well hey, um, Catherine, before you go…

'''Catherine''': Yeah?

'''Chris''': I wanted to let you know: What am I doing in a place like this? Waiting for the most honest, true, and awesome woman to come around in my life.

'''Catherine''': Oh my god, you’re so sweet!

'''Chris''': I’ve had that, I’ve had, I had that in my head for the long time since I’ve…

'''Catherine''': I’ve got to sneeze again. Sorry. No I don't.

'''Chris''': [chuckles]

'''Catherine''': It went back into my forehead.

'''Al''': I hate it when it’s like you’re like 90% ready for sneezing and…

'''Chris''': I’m so glad this is working out very well.

'''Catherine''': Me too. Sorry, we’ve got to get going or I need to, I need to get my things back.

'''Al''': OK.

'''Chris''': OK.

'''Al''': Hey Chris, we’ll both be pretty busy, but you and Catie can talk over the internet and we’ll see if we can work something out.

'''Catherine''': You’ve got my number now, we can text all you like.

'''Chris''': You know where to phone me, yes?

'''Al''': Yeah, we’ll see if we can work something out over the next couple weeks.

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Al''': Maybe meet up again.

'''Chris''': Yeah. Hopefully, uh, Catie, you know where we are, you can come over yourself if you feel like it.

'''Catherine''': Yeah, well I would let you know, obviously. I wouldn’t just turn up, that would be so rude.

'''Al''': Yeah, OK. Yeah, anyway, yeah, we wouldn’t want to interrupt nothin’. Nothin’ like that.

'''Chris''': Yeah, that’s understandable.

'''Al''': Yeah. OK, well it was nice meet- [audio cuts off]

==External Links==
*[https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/16op1Mxtq7rDMXQfI4rEgsmJNSthJHYxH?usp=sharing Download the audio here.]

{{CatherineSaga}}
[[Category:Eyewitness Accounts]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Catherine Saga]]

Clover and Snoopy

2024-04-28T22:55:55Z

LemonShade: /* Poor Living Conditions and Neglect */

{{Needs Updating|[[Anaxis DMs]]}}

{{infobox
| title = Clover and Snoopy
| image = [[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Names
|data1 = Clover Snoopy
|label2 = Nicknames
|data2 = Snoopy-Doo (Snoopy)
|label3 = Date of birth
|data3 = [[March 2012]]
|label4 = Date of death
|data4 = 15 [[July 2021]] (Snoopy)
|label5 = Gender
|data5 = Female (Clover) Male (Snoopy)
|label6 = Breed
|data6 = {{w|Beagle}}
|label7 = Owners
|data7 = [[Barbara]] [[Chris]]
}}

'''Clover''' (b. circa [[March 2012]]<ref>According to their [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry], they were three months old when Chris entered them into the contest. Since registration to the contest began on 16 [[July 2012]] (see [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125245/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Rules.aspx?contestid=64810 contest rules]) and they were registered no later than 1 [[August 2012|August]], this would mean they were born sometime between March and May. Chris has stated that Snoopy was born in March, meaning that Clover could have been born at or around the same time.</ref>) is the Chandlers' beagle. '''Snoopy''' (March 2012 - 15 July 2021) was her brother.<ref name=snoopydeath>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/snoopy-has-died.95170/</ref><ref name=eulogy>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref> The Chandlers bought them at a puppy mill in [[wikipedia:Fredericksburg, Virginia|Fredericksburg]] on 13 [[May 2012]].

The idea of getting beagles was originally Barbara's idea, and Chris eventually acquiesced. The CWC community learned of their existence on 1 [[August 2012]], when a link to an [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry of them] Chris submitted to a [[Chris and contests#Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest|local contest]] was posted on the [[CWCki Forums]]; Chris didn't win the contest.

According to one of Chris's Facebook posts, the dogs are siblings. Clover, Chris's dog, has a white mark on her snout, and Snoopy didn't. Clover has a pink collar, and Snoopy had a green collar. Additionally, they each have an animal chew toy - Clover has a [[duck]] and Snoopy had a [[Megagi La Skunk|skunk]]. Barbara claimed in the [[Rental House Tour]] audio that the dogs were part fox, though this is incredibly unlikely – no authenticated hybrids between domestic dogs and foxes exist.

Snoopy, who officially belonged to Barbara, was named after the dog from ''[[Peanuts]]'', who was also a beagle. Even though Snoopy was her dog, Chris was listed as the person responsible for not getting proper checks and licenses for both dogs, according to legal records from 2016.

Clover is named after the character from the show ''[[My Little Pony]] Tales''.<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

==Poor Living Conditions and Neglect==
{{quote|It’s, it’s awfully inconvenient to take them outside and have to pick it up. I’d rather have it inside, to pick it up. I’m 72 years old, and I don’t...|Barbara on why the dogs relieve themselves inside the house.<ref name=rht>[[Rental House Tour]]</ref>}}

[[File:A few seconds of Barb dancing.png|In the background is one of the newspaper spots where the Chandler dogs relieve themselves. Pictured in April 2018, in the doorway of the [[kitchen]].|thumb|200px]]

Chris and Barbara got Clover and Snoopy from a puppy mill, which are known for breeding dogs solely for profit with no regard to living conditions or proper care, showing a disregard for the animals' welfare. This has been documented to be traumatizing for animals, causing social and behavioral issues down the line.

On 6 [[August 2013]], Chris posted on Facebook a picture of dog urine on a newspaper.<ref>[[August 2013 Facebook Posts#One_of_my_pups_just_peed]]</ref> In [[December 2014]], a statement released by [[Catherine]] (who manipulated Chris into inviting her to the Chandler's [[Rental House]]) confirmed that the dogs are not house-trained, are aggressive towards strangers, and are severely [[obese]]. This was especially apparent in a series of photos released in [[November 2015]]. The dogs were still relieving themselves on newspaper in April 2018, evidenced when Chris filmed a paid request video which showed a newspaper with dog shit on it in the background.<ref>[[April 2018 Paid Video Requests#A few seconds of Barb dancing]]</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Barbara can be heard attempting to justify her gross neglect of the dogs by complaining about how she's too old to take them out to relieve themselves (despite having only gotten the dogs two years prior). A hole in the fence in the backyard, which the Chandlers never bothered to fix, also may have contributed to Barbara's decision to let their dogs piss and shit on the newspapers within the home. Barbara was very likely only being defensive about her neglect, as alternative methods of potty-training dogs whose owners genuinely cannot take them outside could easily have been used such as litter boxes.

When Chris reflected on Snoopy's life, he noted that he'd regularly sleep on the couch with the puppies until January 2014. They also would regularly play in a "mountain of clothes" from Barbara's hoard from which Snoopy fell and injured his left back leg, an injury which he would never fully recover from, making it difficult to traverse stairs. Chris also admitted that he and Barbara could have walked the dogs more often, using Snoopy's leg condition as an excuse for why they had not.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

[[File:Snoopy, 7 December 2018.jpg|An overweight Snoopy, pictured in December 2018. Note the premature greying around his chin, which is sometimes taken as a sign of living in an uncomfortable and [[Chris and stress|stressful]] environment, and the overly-long nails.|thumb|left|200px]]

When faced with a situation where he wanted to go on a date, but Barbara was not home to watch the dogs, Chris's proposed solution was to take the dogs with him, then leave them in the car, though Barbara turned up last minute and was able to watch the dogs.<ref>[[Catherine#The bowling outing]]</ref> Catherine also stated that the dogs are so terribly taken care of that they can't even be left at home by themselves without destroying all the furniture.

Chris also mentioned to Catherine that he has fed the dogs chicken noodle soup,<ref name=rht></ref> which can cause sodium ion poisoning if fed from canned soup with high sodium amounts.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125623/https://canigivemydog.com/chicken-noodle-soup</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Chris is heard cooing and babbling over the dogs.

In [[August 2016]], even though Barbara and Chris both look after the dogs, only Chris was slapped with two (more) misdemeanors on his record, as a result of the Chandlers failing to acquire proper licenses and rabies checks for the dogs, marking the first time the authorities have gotten involved because of the Chandlers' neglect of their pets.

<center><gallery>
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>

[[File:Clover, 7 December 2018.jpg|Clover, also overweight and pictured in December 2018.|thumb|left|200px]]

In 2020, Clover and Snoopy were both heard barking loudly and getting overexcited when pizza deliveries summoned by [[weens]] appeared at the door while [[Live Reading of SNT Vs Sonichu, Part 2|Chris tried reading fanfiction in a livestream]]. Chris notably yelled "SHUT UP!" at them with a noticeable degree of venom in his voice, before they whimpered and presumably recoiled in fear. Due to happening offscreen, it's unclear if Chris did anything besides scream at his pets to prompt that response, although [[The Chris Chan Conspiracy|later footage of the dogs]] indicate that this kind of whimpering happens when they're approached in general, as Chris was shown speaking in a high-pitched "cute" voice when inviting some guests in.

==Stealing a Neighbor's Dog==
According to [[Kim Wilson]], Barbara and Chris once tried to steal a neighbor's dog which had been wandering loose. They eventually gave it back when its owner showed up at their door.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/newold-content-part-2.23995/page-27#post-1759719</ref>

{{quotebox|I don't think I have emails regarding that, but if anyone needs the rundown...a neighbor's dog slipped out of their collar while tied up outside and went wandering around the neighborhood. I'm assuming it was more Barb's idea, but she decided she wanted to keep it so instead of doing the right thing and asking around first. They bought it a collar and a couple of other supplies. Lo and behold, the neighbor goes looking for their dog and winds up at the Chandler's. From what I remember, they put up a fight to keep the dog and blamed the neighbor for being irresponsible. Basically, finders keepers. Neighbor still got their dog back. But Chris couldn't comprehend why it was wrong for them to try and keep the dog. I wonder if this is (part) of the reason they keep their own dogs locked up inside, a fear of repercussion from trying to steal someone else's dog.}}

==Snoopy's Death==
Snoopy passed away in July 2021 in his sleep,<ref name=snoopydeath></ref> at nine years of age; not young, but still shy of a small breed's usual lifespan of 12-15 years. Shortly after his demise, Chris took to social media to offer a eulogy, not unlike the one he gave [[Patti Chandler]] so many years ago, recalling when he and Barbara had acquired Snoopy and Clover and memories of Snoopy, describing Snoopy as caring, understanding and smart. Chris explained that he and a neighbor buried the dog by a tree, making a stone mound around where the body lay as a marker for the pooch and that he was saddened by the dog's death.

Chris resorted to his usual [[Chris and coping|coping mechanism]] of the [[Dimensional Merge]] to help him deal with Snoopy's death, which he mentioned in the eulogy as well. He believes that Snoopy was aware of the Merge and imagined that he saw Snoopy merge with his anthropomorphized version in [[Dimensions#C-197|Dimension C-197]] - becoming a "tall dog guy" that was taller than Patti-Chan - and noted that he could feel solace and comfort knowing Snoopy could better help with the Merge.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

Chris resumed his usual social media habits a day after the dog's passing, though he still mentioned feeling sad about Snoopy in the days afterward. Aside from sharing a few fan tributes to "Snoopy-Doo", Chris fully resumed business as usual later in the month.

==After Chris's arrest==

Following the [[Affair with Mother|incest]] bombshell, with both Chris and Barb being separated from [[14 Branchland Court]] as a result, Clover and the other surviving Chandler household pets were taken care of by a neighbor.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Chris's final messages]]</ref> Unfortunately, Clover and the other pets of the Chandler family were returned to Barb's <strike>neglect</strike> care following her return to the house. Clover can be heard crying for help in the video of some weens [[Fan_visits#Barb_Visit|visiting Barb]].<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cd_VfIhRBg</ref>

It was confirmed during the [[March_2024_livestreams#Christ_Chan_Live_Stream:_Over_the_Shoulder_Colouring_and_Drawing_2| Over the Shoulder Colouring and Drawing 2]] livestream that Barb has been taking care of Clover and "all the cats there".

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Mikmmp.jpg|"Snoopy has a hat on his tush, and Clover is looking at the camera."
Dogs 1.jpg|Clover in a picture on [[Facebook]]
Dogs 2.jpg|Another Facebook picture, with Chris looking extremely fat.
Dogs 3.jpg|Clover again.
Twitter20June201301.png|Clover and Snoopy in a picture on [[Twitter]] from 20 [[June 2013]].
ChrisPupsPeed.png|"One of my pups just peed, and look how it came out. Shaped like a girl."
SnoopyDoobieDoo.png|[[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] and Snoopy.
DogsA.jpg|First in a series of old photos leaked in [[October 2015]].
DogsB.jpg|These were presumably taken in 2012.
DogsC.jpg|Chris posted this photo on his [[Manchester High School]] alumni site page.
DogsD.jpg
DogsE.jpg|Both dogs.
DogsF.jpg|Clover, based on the collar color.
DogsG.jpg
DogsH.jpg
DogsI.jpg
DogsJ.jpg|Very obese.
Cloversnoopy tweet.jpeg|Date unknown. Chris tweeted it in March 2017.
</gallery>
</center>

==References==
<references />

{{People}}

[[Category:Pets]]

Clover and Snoopy

2024-04-28T22:54:03Z

LemonShade: /* Poor Living Conditions and Neglect */

{{Needs Updating|[[Anaxis DMs]]}}

{{infobox
| title = Clover and Snoopy
| image = [[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Names
|data1 = Clover Snoopy
|label2 = Nicknames
|data2 = Snoopy-Doo (Snoopy)
|label3 = Date of birth
|data3 = [[March 2012]]
|label4 = Date of death
|data4 = 15 [[July 2021]] (Snoopy)
|label5 = Gender
|data5 = Female (Clover) Male (Snoopy)
|label6 = Breed
|data6 = {{w|Beagle}}
|label7 = Owners
|data7 = [[Barbara]] [[Chris]]
}}

'''Clover''' (b. circa [[March 2012]]<ref>According to their [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry], they were three months old when Chris entered them into the contest. Since registration to the contest began on 16 [[July 2012]] (see [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125245/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Rules.aspx?contestid=64810 contest rules]) and they were registered no later than 1 [[August 2012|August]], this would mean they were born sometime between March and May. Chris has stated that Snoopy was born in March, meaning that Clover could have been born at or around the same time.</ref>) is the Chandlers' beagle. '''Snoopy''' (March 2012 - 15 July 2021) was her brother.<ref name=snoopydeath>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/snoopy-has-died.95170/</ref><ref name=eulogy>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref> The Chandlers bought them at a puppy mill in [[wikipedia:Fredericksburg, Virginia|Fredericksburg]] on 13 [[May 2012]].

The idea of getting beagles was originally Barbara's idea, and Chris eventually acquiesced. The CWC community learned of their existence on 1 [[August 2012]], when a link to an [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry of them] Chris submitted to a [[Chris and contests#Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest|local contest]] was posted on the [[CWCki Forums]]; Chris didn't win the contest.

According to one of Chris's Facebook posts, the dogs are siblings. Clover, Chris's dog, has a white mark on her snout, and Snoopy didn't. Clover has a pink collar, and Snoopy had a green collar. Additionally, they each have an animal chew toy - Clover has a [[duck]] and Snoopy had a [[Megagi La Skunk|skunk]]. Barbara claimed in the [[Rental House Tour]] audio that the dogs were part fox, though this is incredibly unlikely – no authenticated hybrids between domestic dogs and foxes exist.

Snoopy, who officially belonged to Barbara, was named after the dog from ''[[Peanuts]]'', who was also a beagle. Even though Snoopy was her dog, Chris was listed as the person responsible for not getting proper checks and licenses for both dogs, according to legal records from 2016.

Clover is named after the character from the show ''[[My Little Pony]] Tales''.<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

==Poor Living Conditions and Neglect==
{{quote|It’s, it’s awfully inconvenient to take them outside and have to pick it up. I’d rather have it inside, to pick it up. I’m 72 years old, and I don’t...|Barbara on why the dogs relieve themselves inside the house.<ref name=rht>[[Rental House Tour]]</ref>}}

[[File:A few seconds of Barb dancing.png|In the background is one of the newspaper spots where the Chandler dogs relieve themselves. Pictured in April 2018, in the doorway of the [[kitchen]].|thumb|200px]]

Chris and Barbara got Clover and Snoopy from a puppy mill, which are known for breeding dogs solely for profit with no regard to living conditions or proper care, showing a disregard for the animals' welfare. This has been documented to be traumatizing for animals, causing social and behavioral issues down the line.

On 6 [[August 2013]], Chris posted on Facebook a picture of dog urine on a newspaper.<ref>[[August 2013 Facebook Posts#One_of_my_pups_just_peed]]</ref> In [[December 2014]], a statement released by [[Catherine]] (who manipulated Chris into inviting her to the Chandler's [[Rental House]]) confirmed that the dogs are not house-trained, are aggressive towards strangers, and are severely [[obese]]. This was especially apparent in a series of photos released in [[November 2015]]. The dogs were still relieving themselves on newspaper in April 2018, evidenced when Chris filmed a paid request video which showed a newspaper with dog shit on it in the background.<ref>[[April 2018 Paid Video Requests#A few seconds of Barb dancing]]</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Barbara can be heard attempting to justify her gross neglect of the dogs by complaining about how she's too old to take them out to relieve themselves (despite having only gotten the dogs two years prior). A hole in the fence in the backyard, which the Chandlers never bothered to fix, also may have contributed to Barbara's decision to let their dogs piss and shit on the newspapers within the home. Barbara was very likely only being defensive about her neglect, as alternative methods of potty-training dogs whose owners cannot take them outside could easily have been used such as litter boxes.

When Chris reflected on Snoopy's life, he noted that he'd regularly sleep on the couch with the puppies until January 2014. They also would regularly play in a "mountain of clothes" from Barbara's hoard from which Snoopy fell and injured his left back leg, an injury which he would never fully recover from, making it difficult to traverse stairs. Chris also admitted that he and Barbara could have walked the dogs more often, using Snoopy's leg condition as an excuse for why they had not.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

[[File:Snoopy, 7 December 2018.jpg|An overweight Snoopy, pictured in December 2018. Note the premature greying around his chin, which is sometimes taken as a sign of living in an uncomfortable and [[Chris and stress|stressful]] environment, and the overly-long nails.|thumb|left|200px]]

When faced with a situation where he wanted to go on a date, but Barbara was not home to watch the dogs, Chris's proposed solution was to take the dogs with him, then leave them in the car, though Barbara turned up last minute and was able to watch the dogs.<ref>[[Catherine#The bowling outing]]</ref> Catherine also stated that the dogs are so terribly taken care of that they can't even be left at home by themselves without destroying all the furniture.

Chris also mentioned to Catherine that he has fed the dogs chicken noodle soup,<ref name=rht></ref> which can cause sodium ion poisoning if fed from canned soup with high sodium amounts.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125623/https://canigivemydog.com/chicken-noodle-soup</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Chris is heard cooing and babbling over the dogs.

In [[August 2016]], even though Barbara and Chris both look after the dogs, only Chris was slapped with two (more) misdemeanors on his record, as a result of the Chandlers failing to acquire proper licenses and rabies checks for the dogs, marking the first time the authorities have gotten involved because of the Chandlers' neglect of their pets.

<center><gallery>
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>

[[File:Clover, 7 December 2018.jpg|Clover, also overweight and pictured in December 2018.|thumb|left|200px]]

In 2020, Clover and Snoopy were both heard barking loudly and getting overexcited when pizza deliveries summoned by [[weens]] appeared at the door while [[Live Reading of SNT Vs Sonichu, Part 2|Chris tried reading fanfiction in a livestream]]. Chris notably yelled "SHUT UP!" at them with a noticeable degree of venom in his voice, before they whimpered and presumably recoiled in fear. Due to happening offscreen, it's unclear if Chris did anything besides scream at his pets to prompt that response, although [[The Chris Chan Conspiracy|later footage of the dogs]] indicate that this kind of whimpering happens when they're approached in general, as Chris was shown speaking in a high-pitched "cute" voice when inviting some guests in.

==Stealing a Neighbor's Dog==
According to [[Kim Wilson]], Barbara and Chris once tried to steal a neighbor's dog which had been wandering loose. They eventually gave it back when its owner showed up at their door.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/newold-content-part-2.23995/page-27#post-1759719</ref>

{{quotebox|I don't think I have emails regarding that, but if anyone needs the rundown...a neighbor's dog slipped out of their collar while tied up outside and went wandering around the neighborhood. I'm assuming it was more Barb's idea, but she decided she wanted to keep it so instead of doing the right thing and asking around first. They bought it a collar and a couple of other supplies. Lo and behold, the neighbor goes looking for their dog and winds up at the Chandler's. From what I remember, they put up a fight to keep the dog and blamed the neighbor for being irresponsible. Basically, finders keepers. Neighbor still got their dog back. But Chris couldn't comprehend why it was wrong for them to try and keep the dog. I wonder if this is (part) of the reason they keep their own dogs locked up inside, a fear of repercussion from trying to steal someone else's dog.}}

==Snoopy's Death==
Snoopy passed away in July 2021 in his sleep,<ref name=snoopydeath></ref> at nine years of age; not young, but still shy of a small breed's usual lifespan of 12-15 years. Shortly after his demise, Chris took to social media to offer a eulogy, not unlike the one he gave [[Patti Chandler]] so many years ago, recalling when he and Barbara had acquired Snoopy and Clover and memories of Snoopy, describing Snoopy as caring, understanding and smart. Chris explained that he and a neighbor buried the dog by a tree, making a stone mound around where the body lay as a marker for the pooch and that he was saddened by the dog's death.

Chris resorted to his usual [[Chris and coping|coping mechanism]] of the [[Dimensional Merge]] to help him deal with Snoopy's death, which he mentioned in the eulogy as well. He believes that Snoopy was aware of the Merge and imagined that he saw Snoopy merge with his anthropomorphized version in [[Dimensions#C-197|Dimension C-197]] - becoming a "tall dog guy" that was taller than Patti-Chan - and noted that he could feel solace and comfort knowing Snoopy could better help with the Merge.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

Chris resumed his usual social media habits a day after the dog's passing, though he still mentioned feeling sad about Snoopy in the days afterward. Aside from sharing a few fan tributes to "Snoopy-Doo", Chris fully resumed business as usual later in the month.

==After Chris's arrest==

Following the [[Affair with Mother|incest]] bombshell, with both Chris and Barb being separated from [[14 Branchland Court]] as a result, Clover and the other surviving Chandler household pets were taken care of by a neighbor.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Chris's final messages]]</ref> Unfortunately, Clover and the other pets of the Chandler family were returned to Barb's <strike>neglect</strike> care following her return to the house. Clover can be heard crying for help in the video of some weens [[Fan_visits#Barb_Visit|visiting Barb]].<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cd_VfIhRBg</ref>

It was confirmed during the [[March_2024_livestreams#Christ_Chan_Live_Stream:_Over_the_Shoulder_Colouring_and_Drawing_2| Over the Shoulder Colouring and Drawing 2]] livestream that Barb has been taking care of Clover and "all the cats there".

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Mikmmp.jpg|"Snoopy has a hat on his tush, and Clover is looking at the camera."
Dogs 1.jpg|Clover in a picture on [[Facebook]]
Dogs 2.jpg|Another Facebook picture, with Chris looking extremely fat.
Dogs 3.jpg|Clover again.
Twitter20June201301.png|Clover and Snoopy in a picture on [[Twitter]] from 20 [[June 2013]].
ChrisPupsPeed.png|"One of my pups just peed, and look how it came out. Shaped like a girl."
SnoopyDoobieDoo.png|[[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] and Snoopy.
DogsA.jpg|First in a series of old photos leaked in [[October 2015]].
DogsB.jpg|These were presumably taken in 2012.
DogsC.jpg|Chris posted this photo on his [[Manchester High School]] alumni site page.
DogsD.jpg
DogsE.jpg|Both dogs.
DogsF.jpg|Clover, based on the collar color.
DogsG.jpg
DogsH.jpg
DogsI.jpg
DogsJ.jpg|Very obese.
Cloversnoopy tweet.jpeg|Date unknown. Chris tweeted it in March 2017.
</gallery>
</center>

==References==
<references />

{{People}}

[[Category:Pets]]

Clover and Snoopy

2024-04-28T22:48:07Z

LemonShade: /* Poor Living Conditions and Neglect */

{{Needs Updating|[[Anaxis DMs]]}}

{{infobox
| title = Clover and Snoopy
| image = [[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Names
|data1 = Clover Snoopy
|label2 = Nicknames
|data2 = Snoopy-Doo (Snoopy)
|label3 = Date of birth
|data3 = [[March 2012]]
|label4 = Date of death
|data4 = 15 [[July 2021]] (Snoopy)
|label5 = Gender
|data5 = Female (Clover) Male (Snoopy)
|label6 = Breed
|data6 = {{w|Beagle}}
|label7 = Owners
|data7 = [[Barbara]] [[Chris]]
}}

'''Clover''' (b. circa [[March 2012]]<ref>According to their [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry], they were three months old when Chris entered them into the contest. Since registration to the contest began on 16 [[July 2012]] (see [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125245/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Rules.aspx?contestid=64810 contest rules]) and they were registered no later than 1 [[August 2012|August]], this would mean they were born sometime between March and May. Chris has stated that Snoopy was born in March, meaning that Clover could have been born at or around the same time.</ref>) is the Chandlers' beagle. '''Snoopy''' (March 2012 - 15 July 2021) was her brother.<ref name=snoopydeath>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/snoopy-has-died.95170/</ref><ref name=eulogy>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref> The Chandlers bought them at a puppy mill in [[wikipedia:Fredericksburg, Virginia|Fredericksburg]] on 13 [[May 2012]].

The idea of getting beagles was originally Barbara's idea, and Chris eventually acquiesced. The CWC community learned of their existence on 1 [[August 2012]], when a link to an [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry of them] Chris submitted to a [[Chris and contests#Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest|local contest]] was posted on the [[CWCki Forums]]; Chris didn't win the contest.

According to one of Chris's Facebook posts, the dogs are siblings. Clover, Chris's dog, has a white mark on her snout, and Snoopy didn't. Clover has a pink collar, and Snoopy had a green collar. Additionally, they each have an animal chew toy - Clover has a [[duck]] and Snoopy had a [[Megagi La Skunk|skunk]]. Barbara claimed in the [[Rental House Tour]] audio that the dogs were part fox, though this is incredibly unlikely – no authenticated hybrids between domestic dogs and foxes exist.

Snoopy, who officially belonged to Barbara, was named after the dog from ''[[Peanuts]]'', who was also a beagle. Even though Snoopy was her dog, Chris was listed as the person responsible for not getting proper checks and licenses for both dogs, according to legal records from 2016.

Clover is named after the character from the show ''[[My Little Pony]] Tales''.<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

==Poor Living Conditions and Neglect==
{{quote|It’s, it’s awfully inconvenient to take them outside and have to pick it up. I’d rather have it inside, to pick it up. I’m 72 years old, and I don’t...|Barbara on why the dogs relieve themselves inside the house.<ref name=rht>[[Rental House Tour]]</ref>}}

[[File:A few seconds of Barb dancing.png|In the background is one of the newspaper spots where the Chandler dogs relieve themselves. Pictured in April 2018, in the doorway of the [[kitchen]].|thumb|200px]]

Chris and Barbara got Clover and Snoopy from a puppy mill, which are known for breeding dogs solely for profit with no regard to living conditions or proper care, showing a disregard for the animals' welfare. This has been documented to be traumatizing for animals, causing social and behavioral issues down the line.

On 6 [[August 2013]], Chris posted on Facebook a picture of dog urine on a newspaper.<ref>[[August 2013 Facebook Posts#One_of_my_pups_just_peed]]</ref> In [[December 2014]], a statement released by [[Catherine]] (who manipulated Chris into inviting her to the Chandler's [[Rental House]]) confirmed that the dogs are not house-trained, are aggressive towards strangers, and are severely [[obese]]. This was especially apparent in a series of photos released in [[November 2015]]. The dogs were still relieving themselves on newspaper in April 2018, evidenced when Chris filmed a paid request video which showed a newspaper with dog shit on it in the background.<ref>[[April 2018 Paid Video Requests#A few seconds of Barb dancing]]</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Barbara can be heard attempting to justify her gross neglect of the dogs by complaining about how she's too old to take them out to relieve themselves (despite having only gotten the dogs two years prior). A hole in the fence in the backyard, which the Chandlers never bothered to fix, also may have contributed to Barbara's decision to let their dogs piss and shit on the newspapers within the home.

When Chris reflected on Snoopy's life, he noted that he'd regularly sleep on the couch with the puppies until January 2014. They also would regularly play in a "mountain of clothes" from Barbara's hoard from which Snoopy fell and injured his left back leg, an injury which he would never fully recover from, making it difficult to traverse stairs. Chris also admitted that he and Barbara could have walked the dogs more often, using Snoopy's leg condition as an excuse for why they had not.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

[[File:Snoopy, 7 December 2018.jpg|An overweight Snoopy, pictured in December 2018. Note the premature greying around his chin, which is sometimes taken as a sign of living in an uncomfortable and [[Chris and stress|stressful]] environment, and the overly-long nails.|thumb|left|200px]]

When faced with a situation where he wanted to go on a date, but Barbara was not home to watch the dogs, Chris's proposed solution was to take the dogs with him, then leave them in the car, though Barbara turned up last minute and was able to watch the dogs.<ref>[[Catherine#The bowling outing]]</ref> Catherine also stated that the dogs are so terribly taken care of that they can't even be left at home by themselves without destroying all the furniture.

Chris also mentioned to Catherine that he has fed the dogs chicken noodle soup,<ref name=rht></ref> which can cause sodium ion poisoning if fed from canned soup with high sodium amounts.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125623/https://canigivemydog.com/chicken-noodle-soup</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Chris is heard cooing and babbling over the dogs.

In [[August 2016]], even though Barbara and Chris both look after the dogs, only Chris was slapped with two (more) misdemeanors on his record, as a result of the Chandlers failing to acquire proper licenses and rabies checks for the dogs, marking the first time the authorities have gotten involved because of the Chandlers' neglect of their pets.

<center><gallery>
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>

[[File:Clover, 7 December 2018.jpg|Clover, also overweight and pictured in December 2018.|thumb|left|200px]]

In 2020, Clover and Snoopy were both heard barking loudly and getting overexcited when pizza deliveries summoned by [[weens]] appeared at the door while [[Live Reading of SNT Vs Sonichu, Part 2|Chris tried reading fanfiction in a livestream]]. Chris notably yelled "SHUT UP!" at them with a noticeable degree of venom in his voice, before they whimpered and presumably recoiled in fear. Due to happening offscreen, it's unclear if Chris did anything besides scream at his pets to prompt that response, although [[The Chris Chan Conspiracy|later footage of the dogs]] indicate that this kind of whimpering happens when they're approached in general, as Chris was shown speaking in a high-pitched "cute" voice when inviting some guests in.

==Stealing a Neighbor's Dog==
According to [[Kim Wilson]], Barbara and Chris once tried to steal a neighbor's dog which had been wandering loose. They eventually gave it back when its owner showed up at their door.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/newold-content-part-2.23995/page-27#post-1759719</ref>

{{quotebox|I don't think I have emails regarding that, but if anyone needs the rundown...a neighbor's dog slipped out of their collar while tied up outside and went wandering around the neighborhood. I'm assuming it was more Barb's idea, but she decided she wanted to keep it so instead of doing the right thing and asking around first. They bought it a collar and a couple of other supplies. Lo and behold, the neighbor goes looking for their dog and winds up at the Chandler's. From what I remember, they put up a fight to keep the dog and blamed the neighbor for being irresponsible. Basically, finders keepers. Neighbor still got their dog back. But Chris couldn't comprehend why it was wrong for them to try and keep the dog. I wonder if this is (part) of the reason they keep their own dogs locked up inside, a fear of repercussion from trying to steal someone else's dog.}}

==Snoopy's Death==
Snoopy passed away in July 2021 in his sleep,<ref name=snoopydeath></ref> at nine years of age; not young, but still shy of a small breed's usual lifespan of 12-15 years. Shortly after his demise, Chris took to social media to offer a eulogy, not unlike the one he gave [[Patti Chandler]] so many years ago, recalling when he and Barbara had acquired Snoopy and Clover and memories of Snoopy, describing Snoopy as caring, understanding and smart. Chris explained that he and a neighbor buried the dog by a tree, making a stone mound around where the body lay as a marker for the pooch and that he was saddened by the dog's death.

Chris resorted to his usual [[Chris and coping|coping mechanism]] of the [[Dimensional Merge]] to help him deal with Snoopy's death, which he mentioned in the eulogy as well. He believes that Snoopy was aware of the Merge and imagined that he saw Snoopy merge with his anthropomorphized version in [[Dimensions#C-197|Dimension C-197]] - becoming a "tall dog guy" that was taller than Patti-Chan - and noted that he could feel solace and comfort knowing Snoopy could better help with the Merge.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

Chris resumed his usual social media habits a day after the dog's passing, though he still mentioned feeling sad about Snoopy in the days afterward. Aside from sharing a few fan tributes to "Snoopy-Doo", Chris fully resumed business as usual later in the month.

==After Chris's arrest==

Following the [[Affair with Mother|incest]] bombshell, with both Chris and Barb being separated from [[14 Branchland Court]] as a result, Clover and the other surviving Chandler household pets were taken care of by a neighbor.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Chris's final messages]]</ref> Unfortunately, Clover and the other pets of the Chandler family were returned to Barb's <strike>neglect</strike> care following her return to the house. Clover can be heard crying for help in the video of some weens [[Fan_visits#Barb_Visit|visiting Barb]].<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cd_VfIhRBg</ref>

It was confirmed during the [[March_2024_livestreams#Christ_Chan_Live_Stream:_Over_the_Shoulder_Colouring_and_Drawing_2| Over the Shoulder Colouring and Drawing 2]] livestream that Barb has been taking care of Clover and "all the cats there".

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Mikmmp.jpg|"Snoopy has a hat on his tush, and Clover is looking at the camera."
Dogs 1.jpg|Clover in a picture on [[Facebook]]
Dogs 2.jpg|Another Facebook picture, with Chris looking extremely fat.
Dogs 3.jpg|Clover again.
Twitter20June201301.png|Clover and Snoopy in a picture on [[Twitter]] from 20 [[June 2013]].
ChrisPupsPeed.png|"One of my pups just peed, and look how it came out. Shaped like a girl."
SnoopyDoobieDoo.png|[[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] and Snoopy.
DogsA.jpg|First in a series of old photos leaked in [[October 2015]].
DogsB.jpg|These were presumably taken in 2012.
DogsC.jpg|Chris posted this photo on his [[Manchester High School]] alumni site page.
DogsD.jpg
DogsE.jpg|Both dogs.
DogsF.jpg|Clover, based on the collar color.
DogsG.jpg
DogsH.jpg
DogsI.jpg
DogsJ.jpg|Very obese.
Cloversnoopy tweet.jpeg|Date unknown. Chris tweeted it in March 2017.
</gallery>
</center>

==References==
<references />

{{People}}

[[Category:Pets]]

Clover and Snoopy

2024-04-28T22:45:33Z

LemonShade: /* Poor Living Conditions and Neglect */

{{Needs Updating|[[Anaxis DMs]]}}

{{infobox
| title = Clover and Snoopy
| image = [[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Names
|data1 = Clover Snoopy
|label2 = Nicknames
|data2 = Snoopy-Doo (Snoopy)
|label3 = Date of birth
|data3 = [[March 2012]]
|label4 = Date of death
|data4 = 15 [[July 2021]] (Snoopy)
|label5 = Gender
|data5 = Female (Clover) Male (Snoopy)
|label6 = Breed
|data6 = {{w|Beagle}}
|label7 = Owners
|data7 = [[Barbara]] [[Chris]]
}}

'''Clover''' (b. circa [[March 2012]]<ref>According to their [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry], they were three months old when Chris entered them into the contest. Since registration to the contest began on 16 [[July 2012]] (see [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125245/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Rules.aspx?contestid=64810 contest rules]) and they were registered no later than 1 [[August 2012|August]], this would mean they were born sometime between March and May. Chris has stated that Snoopy was born in March, meaning that Clover could have been born at or around the same time.</ref>) is the Chandlers' beagle. '''Snoopy''' (March 2012 - 15 July 2021) was her brother.<ref name=snoopydeath>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/snoopy-has-died.95170/</ref><ref name=eulogy>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref> The Chandlers bought them at a puppy mill in [[wikipedia:Fredericksburg, Virginia|Fredericksburg]] on 13 [[May 2012]].

The idea of getting beagles was originally Barbara's idea, and Chris eventually acquiesced. The CWC community learned of their existence on 1 [[August 2012]], when a link to an [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry of them] Chris submitted to a [[Chris and contests#Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest|local contest]] was posted on the [[CWCki Forums]]; Chris didn't win the contest.

According to one of Chris's Facebook posts, the dogs are siblings. Clover, Chris's dog, has a white mark on her snout, and Snoopy didn't. Clover has a pink collar, and Snoopy had a green collar. Additionally, they each have an animal chew toy - Clover has a [[duck]] and Snoopy had a [[Megagi La Skunk|skunk]]. Barbara claimed in the [[Rental House Tour]] audio that the dogs were part fox, though this is incredibly unlikely – no authenticated hybrids between domestic dogs and foxes exist.

Snoopy, who officially belonged to Barbara, was named after the dog from ''[[Peanuts]]'', who was also a beagle. Even though Snoopy was her dog, Chris was listed as the person responsible for not getting proper checks and licenses for both dogs, according to legal records from 2016.

Clover is named after the character from the show ''[[My Little Pony]] Tales''.<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

==Poor Living Conditions and Neglect==
{{quote|It’s, it’s awfully inconvenient to take them outside and have to pick it up. I’d rather have it inside, to pick it up. I’m 72 years old, and I don’t...|Barbara on why the dogs relieve themselves inside the house.<ref name=rht>[[Rental House Tour]]</ref>}}

[[File:A few seconds of Barb dancing.png|In the background is one of the newspaper spots where the Chandler dogs relieve themselves. Pictured in April 2018, in the doorway of the [[kitchen]].|thumb|200px]]

Chris and Barbara got Clover and Snoopy from a puppy mill, which are known for breeding dogs solely for profit with no regard to living conditions or proper care, showing a disregard for the animals' welfare.

On 6 [[August 2013]], Chris posted on Facebook a picture of dog urine on a newspaper.<ref>[[August 2013 Facebook Posts#One_of_my_pups_just_peed]]</ref> In [[December 2014]], a statement released by [[Catherine]] (who manipulated Chris into inviting her to the Chandler's [[Rental House]]) confirmed that the dogs are not house-trained, are aggressive towards strangers, and are severely [[obese]]. This was especially apparent in a series of photos released in [[November 2015]]. The dogs were still relieving themselves on newspaper in April 2018, evidenced when Chris filmed a paid request video which showed a newspaper with dog shit on it in the background.<ref>[[April 2018 Paid Video Requests#A few seconds of Barb dancing]]</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Barbara can be heard attempting to justify her gross neglect of the dogs by complaining about how she's too old to take them out to relieve themselves (despite having only gotten the dogs two years prior). A hole in the fence in the backyard, which the Chandlers never bothered to fix, also may have contributed to Barbara's decision to let their dogs piss and shit on the newspapers within the home.

When Chris reflected on Snoopy's life, he noted that he'd regularly sleep on the couch with the puppies until January 2014. They also would regularly play in a "mountain of clothes" from Barbara's hoard from which Snoopy fell and injured his left back leg, an injury which he would never fully recover from, making it difficult to traverse stairs. Chris also admitted that he and Barbara could have walked the dogs more often, using Snoopy's leg condition as an excuse for why they had not.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

[[File:Snoopy, 7 December 2018.jpg|An overweight Snoopy, pictured in December 2018. Note the premature greying around his chin, which is sometimes taken as a sign of living in an uncomfortable and [[Chris and stress|stressful]] environment, and the overly-long nails.|thumb|left|200px]]

When faced with a situation where he wanted to go on a date, but Barbara was not home to watch the dogs, Chris's proposed solution was to take the dogs with him, then leave them in the car, though Barbara turned up last minute and was able to watch the dogs.<ref>[[Catherine#The bowling outing]]</ref> Catherine also stated that the dogs are so terribly taken care of that they can't even be left at home by themselves without destroying all the furniture.

Chris also mentioned to Catherine that he has fed the dogs chicken noodle soup,<ref name=rht></ref> which can cause sodium ion poisoning if fed from canned soup with high sodium amounts.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125623/https://canigivemydog.com/chicken-noodle-soup</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Chris is heard cooing and babbling over the dogs.

In [[August 2016]], even though Barbara and Chris both look after the dogs, only Chris was slapped with two (more) misdemeanors on his record, as a result of the Chandlers failing to acquire proper licenses and rabies checks for the dogs, marking the first time the authorities have gotten involved because of the Chandlers' neglect of their pets.

<center><gallery>
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>

[[File:Clover, 7 December 2018.jpg|Clover, also overweight and pictured in December 2018.|thumb|left|200px]]

In 2020, Clover and Snoopy were both heard barking loudly and getting overexcited when pizza deliveries summoned by [[weens]] appeared at the door while [[Live Reading of SNT Vs Sonichu, Part 2|Chris tried reading fanfiction in a livestream]]. Chris notably yelled "SHUT UP!" at them with a noticeable degree of venom in his voice, before they whimpered and presumably recoiled in fear. Due to happening offscreen, it's unclear if Chris did anything besides scream at his pets to prompt that response, although [[The Chris Chan Conspiracy|later footage of the dogs]] indicate that this kind of whimpering happens when they're approached in general, as Chris was shown speaking in a high-pitched "cute" voice when inviting some guests in.

==Stealing a Neighbor's Dog==
According to [[Kim Wilson]], Barbara and Chris once tried to steal a neighbor's dog which had been wandering loose. They eventually gave it back when its owner showed up at their door.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/newold-content-part-2.23995/page-27#post-1759719</ref>

{{quotebox|I don't think I have emails regarding that, but if anyone needs the rundown...a neighbor's dog slipped out of their collar while tied up outside and went wandering around the neighborhood. I'm assuming it was more Barb's idea, but she decided she wanted to keep it so instead of doing the right thing and asking around first. They bought it a collar and a couple of other supplies. Lo and behold, the neighbor goes looking for their dog and winds up at the Chandler's. From what I remember, they put up a fight to keep the dog and blamed the neighbor for being irresponsible. Basically, finders keepers. Neighbor still got their dog back. But Chris couldn't comprehend why it was wrong for them to try and keep the dog. I wonder if this is (part) of the reason they keep their own dogs locked up inside, a fear of repercussion from trying to steal someone else's dog.}}

==Snoopy's Death==
Snoopy passed away in July 2021 in his sleep,<ref name=snoopydeath></ref> at nine years of age; not young, but still shy of a small breed's usual lifespan of 12-15 years. Shortly after his demise, Chris took to social media to offer a eulogy, not unlike the one he gave [[Patti Chandler]] so many years ago, recalling when he and Barbara had acquired Snoopy and Clover and memories of Snoopy, describing Snoopy as caring, understanding and smart. Chris explained that he and a neighbor buried the dog by a tree, making a stone mound around where the body lay as a marker for the pooch and that he was saddened by the dog's death.

Chris resorted to his usual [[Chris and coping|coping mechanism]] of the [[Dimensional Merge]] to help him deal with Snoopy's death, which he mentioned in the eulogy as well. He believes that Snoopy was aware of the Merge and imagined that he saw Snoopy merge with his anthropomorphized version in [[Dimensions#C-197|Dimension C-197]] - becoming a "tall dog guy" that was taller than Patti-Chan - and noted that he could feel solace and comfort knowing Snoopy could better help with the Merge.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

Chris resumed his usual social media habits a day after the dog's passing, though he still mentioned feeling sad about Snoopy in the days afterward. Aside from sharing a few fan tributes to "Snoopy-Doo", Chris fully resumed business as usual later in the month.

==After Chris's arrest==

Following the [[Affair with Mother|incest]] bombshell, with both Chris and Barb being separated from [[14 Branchland Court]] as a result, Clover and the other surviving Chandler household pets were taken care of by a neighbor.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Chris's final messages]]</ref> Unfortunately, Clover and the other pets of the Chandler family were returned to Barb's <strike>neglect</strike> care following her return to the house. Clover can be heard crying for help in the video of some weens [[Fan_visits#Barb_Visit|visiting Barb]].<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cd_VfIhRBg</ref>

It was confirmed during the [[March_2024_livestreams#Christ_Chan_Live_Stream:_Over_the_Shoulder_Colouring_and_Drawing_2| Over the Shoulder Colouring and Drawing 2]] livestream that Barb has been taking care of Clover and "all the cats there".

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Mikmmp.jpg|"Snoopy has a hat on his tush, and Clover is looking at the camera."
Dogs 1.jpg|Clover in a picture on [[Facebook]]
Dogs 2.jpg|Another Facebook picture, with Chris looking extremely fat.
Dogs 3.jpg|Clover again.
Twitter20June201301.png|Clover and Snoopy in a picture on [[Twitter]] from 20 [[June 2013]].
ChrisPupsPeed.png|"One of my pups just peed, and look how it came out. Shaped like a girl."
SnoopyDoobieDoo.png|[[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] and Snoopy.
DogsA.jpg|First in a series of old photos leaked in [[October 2015]].
DogsB.jpg|These were presumably taken in 2012.
DogsC.jpg|Chris posted this photo on his [[Manchester High School]] alumni site page.
DogsD.jpg
DogsE.jpg|Both dogs.
DogsF.jpg|Clover, based on the collar color.
DogsG.jpg
DogsH.jpg
DogsI.jpg
DogsJ.jpg|Very obese.
Cloversnoopy tweet.jpeg|Date unknown. Chris tweeted it in March 2017.
</gallery>
</center>

==References==
<references />

{{People}}

[[Category:Pets]]

Clover and Snoopy

2024-04-28T22:45:12Z

LemonShade: /* Poor Living Conditions and Neglect */

{{Needs Updating|[[Anaxis DMs]]}}

{{infobox
| title = Clover and Snoopy
| image = [[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Names
|data1 = Clover Snoopy
|label2 = Nicknames
|data2 = Snoopy-Doo (Snoopy)
|label3 = Date of birth
|data3 = [[March 2012]]
|label4 = Date of death
|data4 = 15 [[July 2021]] (Snoopy)
|label5 = Gender
|data5 = Female (Clover) Male (Snoopy)
|label6 = Breed
|data6 = {{w|Beagle}}
|label7 = Owners
|data7 = [[Barbara]] [[Chris]]
}}

'''Clover''' (b. circa [[March 2012]]<ref>According to their [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry], they were three months old when Chris entered them into the contest. Since registration to the contest began on 16 [[July 2012]] (see [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125245/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Rules.aspx?contestid=64810 contest rules]) and they were registered no later than 1 [[August 2012|August]], this would mean they were born sometime between March and May. Chris has stated that Snoopy was born in March, meaning that Clover could have been born at or around the same time.</ref>) is the Chandlers' beagle. '''Snoopy''' (March 2012 - 15 July 2021) was her brother.<ref name=snoopydeath>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/snoopy-has-died.95170/</ref><ref name=eulogy>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref> The Chandlers bought them at a puppy mill in [[wikipedia:Fredericksburg, Virginia|Fredericksburg]] on 13 [[May 2012]].

The idea of getting beagles was originally Barbara's idea, and Chris eventually acquiesced. The CWC community learned of their existence on 1 [[August 2012]], when a link to an [https://web.archive.org/web/20201210124928/http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry of them] Chris submitted to a [[Chris and contests#Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest|local contest]] was posted on the [[CWCki Forums]]; Chris didn't win the contest.

According to one of Chris's Facebook posts, the dogs are siblings. Clover, Chris's dog, has a white mark on her snout, and Snoopy didn't. Clover has a pink collar, and Snoopy had a green collar. Additionally, they each have an animal chew toy - Clover has a [[duck]] and Snoopy had a [[Megagi La Skunk|skunk]]. Barbara claimed in the [[Rental House Tour]] audio that the dogs were part fox, though this is incredibly unlikely – no authenticated hybrids between domestic dogs and foxes exist.

Snoopy, who officially belonged to Barbara, was named after the dog from ''[[Peanuts]]'', who was also a beagle. Even though Snoopy was her dog, Chris was listed as the person responsible for not getting proper checks and licenses for both dogs, according to legal records from 2016.

Clover is named after the character from the show ''[[My Little Pony]] Tales''.<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

==Poor Living Conditions and Neglect==
{{quote|It’s, it’s awfully inconvenient to take them outside and have to pick it up. I’d rather have it inside, to pick it up. I’m 72 years old, and I don’t...|Barbara on why the dogs relieve themselves inside the house.<ref name=rht>[[Rental House Tour]]</ref>}}

[[File:A few seconds of Barb dancing.png|In the background is one of the newspaper spots where the Chandler dogs relieve themselves. Pictured in April 2018, in the doorway of the [[kitchen]].|thumb|200px]]

Chris and Barbara got Clover and Snoopy from a puppy farm, which are known for breeding dogs solely for profit with no regard to living conditions or proper care, showing a disregard for the animals' welfare.

On 6 [[August 2013]], Chris posted on Facebook a picture of dog urine on a newspaper.<ref>[[August 2013 Facebook Posts#One_of_my_pups_just_peed]]</ref> In [[December 2014]], a statement released by [[Catherine]] (who manipulated Chris into inviting her to the Chandler's [[Rental House]]) confirmed that the dogs are not house-trained, are aggressive towards strangers, and are severely [[obese]]. This was especially apparent in a series of photos released in [[November 2015]]. The dogs were still relieving themselves on newspaper in April 2018, evidenced when Chris filmed a paid request video which showed a newspaper with dog shit on it in the background.<ref>[[April 2018 Paid Video Requests#A few seconds of Barb dancing]]</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Barbara can be heard attempting to justify her gross neglect of the dogs by complaining about how she's too old to take them out to relieve themselves (despite having only gotten the dogs two years prior). A hole in the fence in the backyard, which the Chandlers never bothered to fix, also may have contributed to Barbara's decision to let their dogs piss and shit on the newspapers within the home.

When Chris reflected on Snoopy's life, he noted that he'd regularly sleep on the couch with the puppies until January 2014. They also would regularly play in a "mountain of clothes" from Barbara's hoard from which Snoopy fell and injured his left back leg, an injury which he would never fully recover from, making it difficult to traverse stairs. Chris also admitted that he and Barbara could have walked the dogs more often, using Snoopy's leg condition as an excuse for why they had not.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

[[File:Snoopy, 7 December 2018.jpg|An overweight Snoopy, pictured in December 2018. Note the premature greying around his chin, which is sometimes taken as a sign of living in an uncomfortable and [[Chris and stress|stressful]] environment, and the overly-long nails.|thumb|left|200px]]

When faced with a situation where he wanted to go on a date, but Barbara was not home to watch the dogs, Chris's proposed solution was to take the dogs with him, then leave them in the car, though Barbara turned up last minute and was able to watch the dogs.<ref>[[Catherine#The bowling outing]]</ref> Catherine also stated that the dogs are so terribly taken care of that they can't even be left at home by themselves without destroying all the furniture.

Chris also mentioned to Catherine that he has fed the dogs chicken noodle soup,<ref name=rht></ref> which can cause sodium ion poisoning if fed from canned soup with high sodium amounts.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20201210125623/https://canigivemydog.com/chicken-noodle-soup</ref>

In the [[Rental House Tour]], Chris is heard cooing and babbling over the dogs.

In [[August 2016]], even though Barbara and Chris both look after the dogs, only Chris was slapped with two (more) misdemeanors on his record, as a result of the Chandlers failing to acquire proper licenses and rabies checks for the dogs, marking the first time the authorities have gotten involved because of the Chandlers' neglect of their pets.

<center><gallery>
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>

[[File:Clover, 7 December 2018.jpg|Clover, also overweight and pictured in December 2018.|thumb|left|200px]]

In 2020, Clover and Snoopy were both heard barking loudly and getting overexcited when pizza deliveries summoned by [[weens]] appeared at the door while [[Live Reading of SNT Vs Sonichu, Part 2|Chris tried reading fanfiction in a livestream]]. Chris notably yelled "SHUT UP!" at them with a noticeable degree of venom in his voice, before they whimpered and presumably recoiled in fear. Due to happening offscreen, it's unclear if Chris did anything besides scream at his pets to prompt that response, although [[The Chris Chan Conspiracy|later footage of the dogs]] indicate that this kind of whimpering happens when they're approached in general, as Chris was shown speaking in a high-pitched "cute" voice when inviting some guests in.

==Stealing a Neighbor's Dog==
According to [[Kim Wilson]], Barbara and Chris once tried to steal a neighbor's dog which had been wandering loose. They eventually gave it back when its owner showed up at their door.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/newold-content-part-2.23995/page-27#post-1759719</ref>

{{quotebox|I don't think I have emails regarding that, but if anyone needs the rundown...a neighbor's dog slipped out of their collar while tied up outside and went wandering around the neighborhood. I'm assuming it was more Barb's idea, but she decided she wanted to keep it so instead of doing the right thing and asking around first. They bought it a collar and a couple of other supplies. Lo and behold, the neighbor goes looking for their dog and winds up at the Chandler's. From what I remember, they put up a fight to keep the dog and blamed the neighbor for being irresponsible. Basically, finders keepers. Neighbor still got their dog back. But Chris couldn't comprehend why it was wrong for them to try and keep the dog. I wonder if this is (part) of the reason they keep their own dogs locked up inside, a fear of repercussion from trying to steal someone else's dog.}}

==Snoopy's Death==
Snoopy passed away in July 2021 in his sleep,<ref name=snoopydeath></ref> at nine years of age; not young, but still shy of a small breed's usual lifespan of 12-15 years. Shortly after his demise, Chris took to social media to offer a eulogy, not unlike the one he gave [[Patti Chandler]] so many years ago, recalling when he and Barbara had acquired Snoopy and Clover and memories of Snoopy, describing Snoopy as caring, understanding and smart. Chris explained that he and a neighbor buried the dog by a tree, making a stone mound around where the body lay as a marker for the pooch and that he was saddened by the dog's death.

Chris resorted to his usual [[Chris and coping|coping mechanism]] of the [[Dimensional Merge]] to help him deal with Snoopy's death, which he mentioned in the eulogy as well. He believes that Snoopy was aware of the Merge and imagined that he saw Snoopy merge with his anthropomorphized version in [[Dimensions#C-197|Dimension C-197]] - becoming a "tall dog guy" that was taller than Patti-Chan - and noted that he could feel solace and comfort knowing Snoopy could better help with the Merge.<ref name=eulogy></ref>

Chris resumed his usual social media habits a day after the dog's passing, though he still mentioned feeling sad about Snoopy in the days afterward. Aside from sharing a few fan tributes to "Snoopy-Doo", Chris fully resumed business as usual later in the month.

==After Chris's arrest==

Following the [[Affair with Mother|incest]] bombshell, with both Chris and Barb being separated from [[14 Branchland Court]] as a result, Clover and the other surviving Chandler household pets were taken care of by a neighbor.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Chris's final messages]]</ref> Unfortunately, Clover and the other pets of the Chandler family were returned to Barb's <strike>neglect</strike> care following her return to the house. Clover can be heard crying for help in the video of some weens [[Fan_visits#Barb_Visit|visiting Barb]].<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cd_VfIhRBg</ref>

It was confirmed during the [[March_2024_livestreams#Christ_Chan_Live_Stream:_Over_the_Shoulder_Colouring_and_Drawing_2| Over the Shoulder Colouring and Drawing 2]] livestream that Barb has been taking care of Clover and "all the cats there".

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Mikmmp.jpg|"Snoopy has a hat on his tush, and Clover is looking at the camera."
Dogs 1.jpg|Clover in a picture on [[Facebook]]
Dogs 2.jpg|Another Facebook picture, with Chris looking extremely fat.
Dogs 3.jpg|Clover again.
Twitter20June201301.png|Clover and Snoopy in a picture on [[Twitter]] from 20 [[June 2013]].
ChrisPupsPeed.png|"One of my pups just peed, and look how it came out. Shaped like a girl."
SnoopyDoobieDoo.png|[[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] and Snoopy.
DogsA.jpg|First in a series of old photos leaked in [[October 2015]].
DogsB.jpg|These were presumably taken in 2012.
DogsC.jpg|Chris posted this photo on his [[Manchester High School]] alumni site page.
DogsD.jpg
DogsE.jpg|Both dogs.
DogsF.jpg|Clover, based on the collar color.
DogsG.jpg
DogsH.jpg
DogsI.jpg
DogsJ.jpg|Very obese.
Cloversnoopy tweet.jpeg|Date unknown. Chris tweeted it in March 2017.
</gallery>
</center>

==References==
<references />

{{People}}

[[Category:Pets]]

Chris and contests

2024-04-28T21:58:12Z

LemonShade: /* Pokémon Books-A-Million Contest */

Ever since the early [[1990s]], Chris has entered a number of '''contests'''. Chris places great weight on his success and failure with regard to promotional contests. He becomes elated and sees victory as an indication of his own greatness when he wins, yet he becomes enraged and lashes out at the winners when he loses.

==Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes==
{{Main|Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes}}
The Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes was a contest held in [[1993]] to promote the syndicated ''[[Wikipedia:Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog|Adventures of]] [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]''.

The contest's grand prize — a $1,000 [[wikipedia:KB Toys|Kay-Bee Toys]] shopping spree — was awarded to two lucky winners, one of whom happened to be [[Chris]]. This is one of the defining moments of young Chris's life, being the first of many contests Chris has entered over the years.

==Pokémon Books-A-Million Contest==
{{main|A Week With Christian Chandler}}

On 29 April 2000, a Pokémon-themed costume contest was held at [[Books-A-Million]]. Chris, who used to come regularly to the store wearing an Ash Ketchum costume, won the first prize, "a cool T-shirt". He talked about the contest in [[A Week With Christian Chandler]].

==Harvey Birdman Commercial==
{{Main|Harvey Birdman Commercial}}

In February 2005, Cartoon Network held a contest inviting viewers to make a commercial for the ''Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law'' Vol. 1 DVD set. Chris did not win the contest or even place in the top five. This inspired him to post a complaint on the [[Adult Swim]] forums.

=="What would you do for a PS3?" contest==
{{Main|Pixelated PS3}}

In November 2006, Chris entered [[Adult Swim]]'s "What would you do for a PS3?" contest. In his entry video, Chris says he'd throw away the cure for [[autism]] if he had it, he would trade in his PS2, and would make a PS3 out of [[Pixelblocks]], and shows off his Pixelated PS3. Needless to say, Chris did not win the PS3.

==PaRappa the Rapper Contest==
{{Main|PaRappa the Rapper Contest}}

In June 2007, Chris entered the PaRappa the Rapper Contest, which required contestants to film themselves performing an a capella version of either Chop Chop Master Onion's rap, Instructor Mooselini's rap, or Cheap Cheap the Cooking Chicken's rap. The grand prize winner of the contest would receive two [[PSP]]s and an all-expenses-paid trip to Seattle for the 2007 Penny Arcade Expo. Chris hoped that he would win, so that he could bestow one of the PSPs to his beloved [[Megan]] and invite her to accompany him on the trip, thereby creating an opportunity for her to give in to her obvious passion for him.

Chris's video made it into the top 10, from which the winner was to be selected from a vote by PlayStation Underground members in July 2007. Despite a campaign on the part of Chris, the competition was won by [[Adam Stackhouse]], whom Chris bears a grudge against, as he felt Adam broke the rules<ref>[[PSN Blogs#31 July 2007 12:59 — Last Day to VOTE, Rappers!|PSN blog, 31 July 2007]]</ref> by having music and multiple people in his entry. Chris loathed the 2nd and 3rd place winners for having music as well. In actuality, the beatboxing in Adam's video counts as ''a cappella''. Furthermore, another top 10 finalist claimed that he had removed his own music to avoid breaking the rules, but [[Sony]] said it was fine.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWwfRqMZ6QE Momo :: Chop Chop Master Onion Showdown (w/music)] video on [[YouTube]]</ref>

Relentless vote stuffing did earn Chris a reward, however. The rules state that finalists would, "...get their Submissions published on PlayStation.com, and will receive a copy of the game PaRappa the Rapper for the PSP® (PlayStation®Portable) system and some PaRappa branded premium items such as a PSP skin, PSP charm, and a PaRappa signature beanie (ARV $60)."

==Radio station contests==
Chris created [[Li'l Chris]] at the "Create-a-Critter Workshop" after winning a gift certificate from a radio station sometime in his early 20s.<ref>[[IRC (18 December 2008)]]</ref>

In May 2010, Chris won four tickets to an EXTREME ACTION SPORTS show from a radio call-in contest. As he could not find anyone else to go with him, even after he called the members of his Church's Young Adult Social Group, he was forced to scalp the tickets in front of the stadium and then sit alone in the bleachers beside a "lovey-dovey couple". This event prompted the [[Greene County Conspiracy]] video.

==GameStop contests==
[[Image:CWCGUITARHERO.jpg|thumb|right|This image was apparently worth $400.]]
{{Main|GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes}}

Chris entered the GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes in October 2008. The competition required entrants to send in a photograph of themselves in a "guitar hero pose" for the chance to win a $400 GameStop gift certificate.

Several [[trolls]] caught sight of Chris's entry and, mistakenly believing that the person with the most votes would star in the ''Guitar Hero'' game, encouraged people to vote for Chris. Due to this, Chris went on to win the competition.

In August 2010, Chris won another GameStop gift card, this time for $50, through participation in a blood drive.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 11]]</ref>

==''Jackass 3D'' Contest==
{{Main|Cwcsicle}}

In February 2010, Chris entered a contest for the movie ''Jackass 3D'', in which the person who submitted the best prank would get to appear in the film. Needless to say, Chris did not win, as he violated the rules by sticking his [[duck]] in the snow for 15 minutes. ''Jackass''-style pranks were forbidden in this contest; entrants were supposed to send in plans or sketches.<ref>http://jackass-3d-contest.wonderhowto.com/blog/jackass-3d-prank-contest-0118504/</ref>

==Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest==
[[Image:Mikmmp.jpg|thumb|[[Patti]] has been betrayed.]]
On August 1, 2012, trolls discovered the existence of [[Clover and Snoopy]]. Chris decided to take pictures of them and post his photos on the internet in an attempt to gain votes for a contest. In the description, he writes, "Snoopy has a [[Random-access humor|hat on his tush]], and Clover is looking at the camera." The beagles were given positive comments and one person even asked for the dog breeder so they could have one.<ref>http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD</ref> However, Chris did not win the contest. {{clear}}

==Skylanders Creator Contest==
On 17 [[November 2016]], Chris entered a [[Twitter#Skylanders contest|Skylanders contest]].

<center><gallery>
Electricity felicity.jpg
Electricity felicity2.jpg
</gallery></center>

The prize is a 3D print of a custom figure.<ref>http://skylanderscharacterlist.com/skylanders-imaginators-creator-contest-win-a-3d-printed-figure/</ref> Chris would use it to 3D print his own [[Chris and his Ego#Fixation on self-image|Christine Chandler avatar]].

{{quotebox|There will be a grand total of 100 winners (20 winners for each entry period).

Each winner will receive one (1) code redeemable for a 3D printed model of the created character included in the Entry.}}

Unfortunately for him, he failed to follow the guidelines set by the contest.

According to the [https://www.skylanders.com/content/dam/atvi/skylanders/imaginators/sweeps/SkylandersCreatorContest-OfficialRules.pdf rules], the entries will be judged on:

{{quotebox|
*30% diversity of parts comprising character
*30% uniqueness
*40% creativity of accompanying catchphrase}}

Chris neglected to post a catchphrase with his character.

He did not even enter the right category. The [https://twitter.com/SkylandersGame/status/798257445696991232 twitter page] where he submitted stated that the week's entries were for Magic-type characters, however, he entered a Light-type (missing the contest for that type by several days). From the contest page<ref>http://skylanderscharacterlist.com/skylanders-imaginators-creator-contest-win-a-3d-printed-figure/</ref>:

{{quotebox|
Entry Period 1: October 24, 2016 10 AM to October 30, 11:59 PM – Water
Entry Period 2: October 31, 2016 12:00 AM to November 6, 2016 11:59 PM – Undead
Entry Period 3: November 7, 2016 12:00 AM to November 13, 2016 11:59 PM – Light
Entry Period 4: November 14, 2016 12:00 AM to November 20, 2016 11:59 PM
Entry Period 5: November 21, 2016 12:00 AM to November 27, 2016 11:59 PM}}

He tried again a few days later, minutes before the contest deadline, providing a catchphrase and entering under the right category.

==Best of C-ville 2017==
A yearly poll conducted by C-VILLE Weekly, a Charlottesville, VA publication. The poll for 2017 was conducted in two stages – one where people could submit their own entries to the poll and a second where finalists would be chosen by staff for another round of public voting.

In May 2017, Chris was added to the poll under the "Best Local Minor Celebrity" category. He took to Facebook to announce it and asked his fans to vote for him.<ref>[[May 2017 Facebook posts#In the running for Best Local Minor Celebrity]]</ref>

Once it was discovered that anyone viewing the poll could add entries and that people could vote multiple times by clearing cookies or opening a private browser session, shenanigans ensued, with joke entries based on Chris getting stuffed into the poll.<ref>http://cwcki.club/index.php?threads/fb-5-11-chris-in-the-running-for-best-local-minor-celebrity-6-3-chris-lost-mad-at-trolls.1401/#post-28910</ref> Chris took the lead for a time.

However, the joke entries quickly grew out of control. Chris tried to run damage control,<ref>[[May 2017 Facebook posts#Clarification]]</ref> saying to "not add my name, or any other similar versions of, under Any Other Category; I am Not a Place or Event, and I have not been on television, recently."

Ultimately, the C-VILLE Weekly staff took notice and deleted the Chris references from the poll. Annoyed, Chris complained on Facebook, posting, "I did not make the finals. Thanks a lump for over-voting me out, you Trolling Stupids."<ref>[[June 2017 Facebook posts#Lost the C-ville Best Of poll, mad at trolls]]</ref>

==Chris Holds His Own Contest==

On 29 [[January 2024]], Chris posted on Twitter announcing his own [[January 2024 social media posts#Contest|contest for artists and fanfic authors]], with his own set of rules and submission guidelines. Winners were promised a Sonichu medallion and a set of autographed print Sonichu comics #0-3.

==See also==
* [[Chris and brand loyalty]]

==References==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

1980s

2024-04-23T15:58:17Z

LemonShade: /* Events of 1982 */

[[Image:0028-ChristopherWMom1.jpg|thumb|Chris and his mom in the eighties.]]
[[Image:0002-BabyChristopher.jpg|thumb|Baby Chris in '''1982''']]
[[Image:0002-1-Baby_Chris_and_Mommy.jpg|thumb|Baby Chris and Barbara.]]
[[File:0011-ChristopherBobXmas.jpg|thumb|ChrisChan celebrating Christmas]]
[[File:Cwcbaby.jpg|thumb|TRUE and HONEST BabyCWC]]
[[Image:0004-ChristopherDec1985.jpg|thumb|Chris and Barbara in '''1985'''.]]
[[Image:0006-Christopher6-1986.jpg|thumb|'''1986''']]
[[Image:0008-ChristopherShopping12-1986.jpg|thumb|Chris in '''1986'''.]]
[[Image:0024-ChristopherTurns5.jpg|thumb|'''1987''', Chris turns 5.]]
[[File:Dreaming studio.png|thumb|In '''1989''', Bob created the Dreaming Studio.]]
[[Image:0031-1-Chris_on_Pony.jpg|thumb|Poor pony.]]
[[Image:0031-EasterChristopher.jpg|thumb|Twenty years later, Chris himself would have a try at the [[Bunny Hop]].]]
{{Quote|Cute Little Boys and Girls grow up, and I was no exception.|Chris<ref>[[DVD Slideshow Transcripts]]</ref>}}

The '''1980s''' was a very eventful decade, known to most for [[Chris and fashion|neon colors]], [[Nintendo]]'s rise in the USA, the home [[computer]] revolution, [[Chris and music|synthesizers]], and [[Pmurt|Reagan]]. But to us, it's the decade when [[Christian Weston Chandler]] was born, under the name Christopher (his name wasn't changed until [[1994]]).

Source material referring to the 1980s is scarce, and this article is mostly based on statements made by Chris at a later age, and on image material. Being mute for most of the decade, Chris has few reliable memories of it. Chris would often indicate that his early childhood was filled with trouble. His true nostalgia sits mostly in the [[1990s]].

However, his [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys COMEBACK!|second album]] features a plethora of '80s music parodies, indicating he has some fondness for the decade, or at least likes its sound. He has also twice referenced being born in the '80s in his [[June 2021 social media posts]].

==1980==
The year [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] and [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]] got married.

===Events of 1980===
* 1980 - [[Cole Smithey|Cole]] moves to California.<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 1]]</ref> Whom he lived with is unclear, as he would turn 17 this year and was thus unable to legally live on his own unless he was emancipated.
* 1980 (sometime after 7 June) - Bob is transferred from [[Richmond]] to [[Charlottesville]].
* 7 January - Jerry Harmon divorces Barbara
* 28 January - Bob divorces his first wife, Patricia Harley.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/interesting-info-about-chriss-family-particularly-their-parents.27521/</ref>
* 5 March - [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]] is inaugurated and opened to the public.
* 7 June - Bob and Barbara get married.<ref>[[Sarah Reveals Herself#Family matters]]</ref><ref>[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]</ref> At this point they are still living in the [[Richmond]] area,<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20170514161725/http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html#P155</ref> specifically Chesterfield County (to which the Chandlers would later return in the [[1990s]])
* August - Bob receives the first of two triple bypass operations.

==1981==
The last year of peace for Bob and Barbara Chandler. Unluckily for them, the happy couple filled their time with lots of unprotected love-making. During the second half on this year, Barbara would be pregnant.

===Events of 1981===
* 1981 - Cole joins the Rockin' Dogs.
* 1981 - [[Natasha Turner]], who Chris describes as slightly older than him, is most likely born this year.
* 26 May (approx.) - Bob and Barbara Chandler have sweaty old people sex. [[Christian Weston Chandler|Christopher Weston Chandler]] is conceived.
* Fall 1981 - Cole enters San Diego State University.
* 26 November (approx.) - Barbara's last chance to abort Chris.

==1982==
The year where it all began.

===Events of 1982===
* This Year - Most of Chris's gal-pals are likely born in this year, due to them being in the same grade. This includes [[Tiffany Gowen]], [[Kellie Andes]], [[Sarah Anne Bevel]], [[Molly Quarles]], [[Miranda Joyce Mitchell]] and [[Tiffany Robinson]].
* 24 February - Christopher Weston Chandler is born around 5:30 a.m. at {{w|Martha Jefferson Hospital}} in [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]].<ref>[[Chris's Wikipedia profile#The One, The Only, From his own Honest-to-God Words]]</ref>
* 24 February - Chris is brought back to the Chandler [[house]]hold in [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]].<ref name=song>According to Christian in the [[Song of Christian]] video.</ref>
* February/March - Chris's newborn portrait is taken.
* April - Chris allegedly speaks his first word: "[[Niggos|monkey]]"<ref name=song/><ref name=EarlyYears>[[Chris's Wikipedia profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref>, though this is physically impossible.
* 4 September - [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]'s 55th birthday.
* Autumn - A photo is taken of Chris and his mother on their front lawn.
* 1 October - [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]]'s 41st birthday.
* 13 October - [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]] is born.<ref name="LifeShares">[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#The Story]]</ref>
* 25 December - Birth of [[Alec Benson Leary]].

==1983==
Chris has stated that, in '''1983''', he was abused by his [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]], "starting" his [[autism]]. On other occasions, however, Chris has said that he is aware of autism being a hereditary condition, making his "acquisition" of autism impossible.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> We can nonetheless assume that the abuse Christopher suffered in 1983 was traumatic and possibly exacerbated his condition.<ref name=song/>

===Events of 1983===
* 24 February - Christopher's 1st birthday.
* 1 April - [[Jacob Sockness]] is born.
* 30 June - [[Kacey]] is born.
* August - Christopher's autism allegedly "begins". He claims the reason was an evil babysitter named Roach, who locked him in a room. He becomes mute.<ref name=song/><ref name=EarlyYears/>
* 4 September - Bob's 56th birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 42nd birthday.

==1984==
In '''1984''', Chris lived his life in [[Ruckersville]] as a mute toddler. He himself declared that he gave his parents a lot of trouble, and he screeched a lot.<ref name=EarlyYears/> It is possibly indicated that his parents held this against him at a later age, and didn't really like caring for the [[Autism|autistic]] child they had created themselves.

===Events of 1984===
* 24 February - Christopher's 2nd birthday.
* 1984 - Cole graduates from San Diego State University with a Dramatic Art degree in Music.
* 4 September - Bob's 57th birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 43rd birthday.

==1985==
In '''1985''', Chris is still a mute, screeching toddler. He meets his first [[gal pal]], [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarah]].

===Events of 1985===
* This year - Sarah Hammer and her family moves to Chris's neighborhood. The cordial relations that develops between the Hammer and Chandler couples lead to some sort of friendship between Chris and Sarah.<ref name="LifeShares" />
* This year - Cole's band, The Rockin Dogs, disbands.
* This year - Birth of [[Robert Simmons V]].
* This year - Barb [[2018 Sales Listings#Autographed Johnny Cash photo|visits a Johnny Cash concert]].
* 24 February - Christopher's 3rd birthday.
* April - Chris has his picture taken holding a [[4-cent garbage|leaf]].
* 30 July - Birth of [[Anna McLerran]].
* 12 August - Birth of [[Jack Thaddeus]].
* 4 September - Bob's 58th birthday.
* 20 September - Birth of [[Ethan Ralph]]
* 1 October - Barb's 44th birthday.
* December - Chris and Barbara have their picture taken with Santa Claus.

==1986==
In '''1986''', Chris is still a mute, screeching toddler.

===Events of 1986===
* 17 January - ''[[The Adventures of the American Rabbit]]'' is released.
* 24 February - Christopher's 4th birthday.
* 1 March - Birth of [[William Elliott Waterman]].
* June - Chris has his picture taken at what seems to be a zoo.
* 23 July - Birth of [[Megan Schroeder]].
* 4 September - Bob's 59th birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 45th birthday.
* 17 October - Birth of [[Count Dankula]].
* December - Chris has his picture taken in front of a bathroom, and at a shopping mall.
* 25 December - Chris receives an abundance of toys for Christmas, including a giant {{w|An American Tail|Fievel}} doll, Raggedy Ann dolls, and several pieces of ''Sesame Street'' merchandise. Bob receives a book entitled "Your IBM PC Made Easy".

==1987==
In '''1987''', Chris starts attending [[Greene County Primary School]]. It isn't known for sure if he attended preschool before then.

===Events of 1987===
* Date unknown - Bob retires from his engineering job at both {{w|Western Electric}} and {{w|General Electric}}.<ref>[[Bob's Letters to Chris]]</ref>
* 24 February - Christopher's 5th birthday. A paper hat is made in his honor.
* August/September - Chris begins kindergarten at [[Greene County Primary School]].
* Autumn - Chris's school portrait is taken where he is holding a ball and is seated at a desk with an apple and a textbook placed on it.
* 4 September - Bob's 60th birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 46th birthday.
* 26 December - Bob writes a [[Bob's Letters to Chris|letter]] describing his hopes and dreams for Chris.

==1988==
In '''1988''', Chris, still mute, begins first grade at Greene County Primary School. Later in either this year or the next, he joined the [[Chris and religion|Cub Scouts]]. He was later [[List of places that have banned Chris#The Cub Scouts|kicked out]] for unknown reasons.

===Events of 1988===
* Date unknown - [[Minor_Family_Members#Carol_Suzanne_Chandler|Carol Chandler]] wins the E.J. McShane Prize.
* 24 February - Christopher's 6th birthday.
* 17 March - [[Patti]] is born.<ref>As can be read in [[:File:Sonichu - Episode 12.5, Page 1.jpg|Sonichu #6]].</ref>
* August/September - Chris begins first grade at Greene County Primary School.
* 4 September - Bob's 61st birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 47th birthday.
* 29 October - The Japanese release of the [[Sega]] Genesis.
* 14 December - [[Vanessa Hudgens]] is born.

==1989==
In '''1989''', helped by the language training at [[James Madison University]], Christopher starts talking again whilst reading a GoBots package.<ref name=song/>

Chris believes this was the year in which he had his encounter with [[Leonard Bearstein]], but contemporary evidence shows that this actually happened in [[1992]].

===Events of 1989===
* 1989 - Chris claims that he had a [[dream]] in which he foresaw himself with a daughter named [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]], and an office job.
* 1989 - Bob puts up a plaque in his workshop which reads "DREAMING STUDIO OF MR. C AND LITTLE C WHERE DREAMS DO COME TRUE - 1989".
* 24 January - [[Bundychu|Ted Bundy]] is executed.
* 24 February - Christopher's 7th birthday.
* July - The Chandlers fly to San Francisco, California for [[Cole Smithey|Cole]]'s 26th birthday, which was on the 24th of the month. Barb would later describe the trip as "painful".
* 13 July - [[Julie Milvana]] is born
* August/September - Chris enters second grade at Greene County Primary School.
* 14 August - The North American release of the Sega Genesis.
* 4 September - Bob turns 62.
* 1 October - Barb turns 48.
* 25 December - Chris gets his second gaming system, a [[Nintendo]] Game Boy, for Christmas.

==References==
<references />

{{Timeline}}

[[Category:Chronology]]

1980s

2024-04-23T04:40:38Z

LemonShade: its not a disease

[[Image:0028-ChristopherWMom1.jpg|thumb|Chris and his mom in the eighties.]]
[[Image:0002-BabyChristopher.jpg|thumb|Baby Chris in '''1982''']]
[[Image:0002-1-Baby_Chris_and_Mommy.jpg|thumb|Baby Chris and Barbara.]]
[[File:0011-ChristopherBobXmas.jpg|thumb|ChrisChan celebrating Christmas]]
[[File:Cwcbaby.jpg|thumb|TRUE and HONEST BabyCWC]]
[[Image:0004-ChristopherDec1985.jpg|thumb|Chris and Barbara in '''1985'''.]]
[[Image:0006-Christopher6-1986.jpg|thumb|'''1986''']]
[[Image:0008-ChristopherShopping12-1986.jpg|thumb|Chris in '''1986'''.]]
[[Image:0024-ChristopherTurns5.jpg|thumb|'''1987''', Chris turns 5.]]
[[File:Dreaming studio.png|thumb|In '''1989''', Bob created the Dreaming Studio.]]
[[Image:0031-1-Chris_on_Pony.jpg|thumb|Poor pony.]]
[[Image:0031-EasterChristopher.jpg|thumb|Twenty years later, Chris himself would have a try at the [[Bunny Hop]].]]
{{Quote|Cute Little Boys and Girls grow up, and I was no exception.|Chris<ref>[[DVD Slideshow Transcripts]]</ref>}}

The '''1980s''' was a very eventful decade, known to most for [[Chris and fashion|neon colors]], [[Nintendo]]'s rise in the USA, the home [[computer]] revolution, [[Chris and music|synthesizers]], and [[Pmurt|Reagan]]. But to us, it's the decade when [[Christian Weston Chandler]] was born, under the name Christopher (his name wasn't changed until [[1994]]).

Source material referring to the 1980s is scarce, and this article is mostly based on statements made by Chris at a later age, and on image material. Being mute for most of the decade, Chris has few reliable memories of it. Chris would often indicate that his early childhood was filled with trouble. His true nostalgia sits mostly in the [[1990s]].

However, his [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys COMEBACK!|second album]] features a plethora of '80s music parodies, indicating he has some fondness for the decade, or at least likes its sound. He has also twice referenced being born in the '80s in his [[June 2021 social media posts]].

==1980==
The year [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] and [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]] got married.

===Events of 1980===
* 1980 - [[Cole Smithey|Cole]] moves to California.<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 1]]</ref> Whom he lived with is unclear, as he would turn 17 this year and was thus unable to legally live on his own unless he was emancipated.
* 1980 (sometime after 7 June) - Bob is transferred from [[Richmond]] to [[Charlottesville]].
* 7 January - Jerry Harmon divorces Barbara
* 28 January - Bob divorces his first wife, Patricia Harley.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/interesting-info-about-chriss-family-particularly-their-parents.27521/</ref>
* 5 March - [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]] is inaugurated and opened to the public.
* 7 June - Bob and Barbara get married.<ref>[[Sarah Reveals Herself#Family matters]]</ref><ref>[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]</ref> At this point they are still living in the [[Richmond]] area,<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20170514161725/http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html#P155</ref> specifically Chesterfield County (to which the Chandlers would later return in the [[1990s]])
* August - Bob receives the first of two triple bypass operations.

==1981==
The last year of peace for Bob and Barbara Chandler. Unluckily for them, the happy couple filled their time with lots of unprotected love-making. During the second half on this year, Barbara would be pregnant.

===Events of 1981===
* 1981 - Cole joins the Rockin' Dogs.
* 1981 - [[Natasha Turner]], who Chris describes as slightly older than him, is most likely born this year.
* 26 May (approx.) - Bob and Barbara Chandler have sweaty old people sex. [[Christian Weston Chandler|Christopher Weston Chandler]] is conceived.
* Fall 1981 - Cole enters San Diego State University.
* 26 November (approx.) - Barbara's last chance to abort Chris.

==1982==
The year where it all began.

===Events of 1982===
* This Year - Most of Chris's gal-pals are likely born in this year, due to them being in the same grade. This includes [[Tiffany Gowen]], [[Kellie Andes]], [[Sarah Anne Bevel]], [[Molly Quarles]], [[Miranda Joyce Mitchell]] and [[Tiffany Robinson]].
* 24 February - Christopher Weston Chandler is born around 5:30 a.m. at {{w|Martha Jefferson Hospital}} in [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]].<ref>[[Chris's Wikipedia profile#The One, The Only, From his own Honest-to-God Words]]</ref>
* 24 February - Chris is brought back to the Chandler [[house]]hold in [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]].<ref name=song>According to Christian in the [[Song of Christian]] video.</ref>
* February/March - Chris's newborn portrait is taken.
* April - Chris allegedly speaks his first word: "[[Niggos|monkey]]".<ref name=song/><ref name=EarlyYears>[[Chris's Wikipedia profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref>
* 4 September - [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]'s 55th birthday.
* Autumn - A photo is taken of Chris and his mother on their front lawn.
* 1 October - [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]]'s 41st birthday.
* 13 October - [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]] is born.<ref name="LifeShares">[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#The Story]]</ref>
* 25 December - Birth of [[Alec Benson Leary]].

==1983==
Chris has stated that, in '''1983''', he was abused by his [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]], "starting" his [[autism]]. On other occasions, however, Chris has said that he is aware of autism being a hereditary condition, making his "acquisition" of autism impossible.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> We can nonetheless assume that the abuse Christopher suffered in 1983 was traumatic and possibly exacerbated his condition.<ref name=song/>

===Events of 1983===
* 24 February - Christopher's 1st birthday.
* 1 April - [[Jacob Sockness]] is born.
* 30 June - [[Kacey]] is born.
* August - Christopher's autism allegedly "begins". He claims the reason was an evil babysitter named Roach, who locked him in a room. He becomes mute.<ref name=song/><ref name=EarlyYears/>
* 4 September - Bob's 56th birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 42nd birthday.

==1984==
In '''1984''', Chris lived his life in [[Ruckersville]] as a mute toddler. He himself declared that he gave his parents a lot of trouble, and he screeched a lot.<ref name=EarlyYears/> It is possibly indicated that his parents held this against him at a later age, and didn't really like caring for the [[Autism|autistic]] child they had created themselves.

===Events of 1984===
* 24 February - Christopher's 2nd birthday.
* 1984 - Cole graduates from San Diego State University with a Dramatic Art degree in Music.
* 4 September - Bob's 57th birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 43rd birthday.

==1985==
In '''1985''', Chris is still a mute, screeching toddler. He meets his first [[gal pal]], [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarah]].

===Events of 1985===
* This year - Sarah Hammer and her family moves to Chris's neighborhood. The cordial relations that develops between the Hammer and Chandler couples lead to some sort of friendship between Chris and Sarah.<ref name="LifeShares" />
* This year - Cole's band, The Rockin Dogs, disbands.
* This year - Birth of [[Robert Simmons V]].
* This year - Barb [[2018 Sales Listings#Autographed Johnny Cash photo|visits a Johnny Cash concert]].
* 24 February - Christopher's 3rd birthday.
* April - Chris has his picture taken holding a [[4-cent garbage|leaf]].
* 30 July - Birth of [[Anna McLerran]].
* 12 August - Birth of [[Jack Thaddeus]].
* 4 September - Bob's 58th birthday.
* 20 September - Birth of [[Ethan Ralph]]
* 1 October - Barb's 44th birthday.
* December - Chris and Barbara have their picture taken with Santa Claus.

==1986==
In '''1986''', Chris is still a mute, screeching toddler.

===Events of 1986===
* 17 January - ''[[The Adventures of the American Rabbit]]'' is released.
* 24 February - Christopher's 4th birthday.
* 1 March - Birth of [[William Elliott Waterman]].
* June - Chris has his picture taken at what seems to be a zoo.
* 23 July - Birth of [[Megan Schroeder]].
* 4 September - Bob's 59th birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 45th birthday.
* 17 October - Birth of [[Count Dankula]].
* December - Chris has his picture taken in front of a bathroom, and at a shopping mall.
* 25 December - Chris receives an abundance of toys for Christmas, including a giant {{w|An American Tail|Fievel}} doll, Raggedy Ann dolls, and several pieces of ''Sesame Street'' merchandise. Bob receives a book entitled "Your IBM PC Made Easy".

==1987==
In '''1987''', Chris starts attending [[Greene County Primary School]]. It isn't known for sure if he attended preschool before then.

===Events of 1987===
* Date unknown - Bob retires from his engineering job at both {{w|Western Electric}} and {{w|General Electric}}.<ref>[[Bob's Letters to Chris]]</ref>
* 24 February - Christopher's 5th birthday. A paper hat is made in his honor.
* August/September - Chris begins kindergarten at [[Greene County Primary School]].
* Autumn - Chris's school portrait is taken where he is holding a ball and is seated at a desk with an apple and a textbook placed on it.
* 4 September - Bob's 60th birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 46th birthday.
* 26 December - Bob writes a [[Bob's Letters to Chris|letter]] describing his hopes and dreams for Chris.

==1988==
In '''1988''', Chris, still mute, begins first grade at Greene County Primary School. Later in either this year or the next, he joined the [[Chris and religion|Cub Scouts]]. He was later [[List of places that have banned Chris#The Cub Scouts|kicked out]] for unknown reasons.

===Events of 1988===
* Date unknown - [[Minor_Family_Members#Carol_Suzanne_Chandler|Carol Chandler]] wins the E.J. McShane Prize.
* 24 February - Christopher's 6th birthday.
* 17 March - [[Patti]] is born.<ref>As can be read in [[:File:Sonichu - Episode 12.5, Page 1.jpg|Sonichu #6]].</ref>
* August/September - Chris begins first grade at Greene County Primary School.
* 4 September - Bob's 61st birthday.
* 1 October - Barb's 47th birthday.
* 29 October - The Japanese release of the [[Sega]] Genesis.
* 14 December - [[Vanessa Hudgens]] is born.

==1989==
In '''1989''', helped by the language training at [[James Madison University]], Christopher starts talking again whilst reading a GoBots package.<ref name=song/>

Chris believes this was the year in which he had his encounter with [[Leonard Bearstein]], but contemporary evidence shows that this actually happened in [[1992]].

===Events of 1989===
* 1989 - Chris claims that he had a [[dream]] in which he foresaw himself with a daughter named [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]], and an office job.
* 1989 - Bob puts up a plaque in his workshop which reads "DREAMING STUDIO OF MR. C AND LITTLE C WHERE DREAMS DO COME TRUE - 1989".
* 24 January - [[Bundychu|Ted Bundy]] is executed.
* 24 February - Christopher's 7th birthday.
* July - The Chandlers fly to San Francisco, California for [[Cole Smithey|Cole]]'s 26th birthday, which was on the 24th of the month. Barb would later describe the trip as "painful".
* 13 July - [[Julie Milvana]] is born
* August/September - Chris enters second grade at Greene County Primary School.
* 14 August - The North American release of the Sega Genesis.
* 4 September - Bob turns 62.
* 1 October - Barb turns 48.
* 25 December - Chris gets his second gaming system, a [[Nintendo]] Game Boy, for Christmas.

==References==
<references />

{{Timeline}}

[[Category:Chronology]]

Semen

2024-04-23T04:39:26Z

LemonShade: its not a disease

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Honest}}
[[Image:CWCcomeuppancemedallion.JPG|thumb|right|250px|The closest [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]] will ever get to touching the [[Medallion|Medallion of Fail]].]]

'''Semen''' is a fluid secreted in the [[duck]]s and [[pickle]]s of males and [[tomgirl]]s, used primarily to impregnate females, or to simply release while [[mass debating]]. [[Chris]] has many misconceptions about its purpose and function.

Despite being "[[honest]]" about [[sex]], Chris is sometimes uncomfortable saying "semen" and occasionally uses his own unique expurgated terms, shown below.

==Chris's slang terms for semen==
===Comeuppance===
In the context of sex (especially oral) with his [[TRUE and HONEST]] [[sweetheart]], Chris refers to ejaculation as "comeuppance," as seen here:

{{quote|Uh, it just feels so good, unngghh, and because me being a [[virgin]], I would let you keep your mouth over my penis and then sooner than expected, I '''feel my comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my semen is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop.|Chris, "My First Time"<ref name="Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted">[[Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted]]</ref>}}

{{quote|Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your BREASTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN until you get the first DOSAGE of my comeuppance!|Chris, [[Kacey Phone Call]]}}

Chris presumably coined the term because a) ejaculating can also be referred to as "coming", b) it goes "up" when it comes out of his bent [[duck]], and c) he's an [[Slow-in-the-minds|idiot]]. However, this created a shitstorm when his sex tapes dropped, because [[Wikipedia:Webster's Dictionary|Webster's]] defines comeuppance as "a deserved rebuke or penalty."<ref>http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/comeuppance</ref> While Chris most likely heard this word and thought it would make a clever euphemism for "cum", the true meaning and its context seems to suggest an eerie [[Wikipedia:Freudian slip|Freudian slip]].

===Navy===
Another [[CWC-ism]] for ejaculation is ''navy'', a reference to the fact that "semen" sounds like "seamen".<ref>[[Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009]]</ref>

==A tasty treat==
[[File:Sonichu - Advertisement, Got Milk?.jpg|thumb|200px|No caption is necessary.]]

Chris believes that whatever he eats changes the flavor of semen, which may have some basis in fact.<ref>http://ezinearticles.com/?Sperm-Taste---10-Simple-Tips-For-Better-Tasting-Semen&id=164106</ref> However, what makes this ridiculous is that [[honor roll|Chris thinks his semen will taste ''exactly'' like whatever he eats.]] He has indicated that he would strive for flavored comeuppance so his sweetheart/cum dumpster would savor the taste. In the sex tape audio, Chris presented the following scenario to [[PandaHalo]]:

{{quote|I would have eaten so much chocolate, that day beforehand, and it would taste so yummy to you, probably like white chocolate. You'd swallow that.|Chris<ref name="Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted"/>}}

In subsequent chats with [[Julie]], this fantasy was revised so that his comeuppance would taste like strawberries.<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

Coincidentally, sweets and other unhealthy foods are known to make semen taste even worse than usual. Chocolate is one of the worst offenders.

==Recycling==
{{quote|Mmm! Goes down salty.|Chris<ref>[[Chris's Big Night Out]]</ref>}}

Another tidbit revealed in the sex tapes was that when Chris mass debates, he makes sure to ejaculate into a [[Fapcup|plastic cup]], to avoid making a mess.<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs#Chris on Masturbation and the Sex Joke]]</ref> Shortly after this news broke, talk began to grow that Chris actually drinks from this cup.

The initial assumption, given Chris's hard stance on [[homos]], was that Chris was a devout, fundamentalist Christian and therefore had a rigid interpretation of the Biblical story of [[Wikipedia:Onan|Onan]]<ref>http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2205/what-exactly-was-the-sin-of-onan</ref> (This was before we found out Chris [[Chris and religion|wouldn't know anything about the Bible]] unless he heard it on ''[[Family Guy]]''). Eventually the real reason was discovered: Chris believes that by ingesting his own sperm he can "recycle" it, so that none of his potential children are lost, and so that his "semen count" (presumably he meant "sperm count") remains high, as though everyone is born with a finite number of sperm that they can eventually run out of if they don't swallow more. He may have learned this about egg cells, which DO have a finite quantity, and confused the two. An alternative theory is that Chris took this belief from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "Emission Impossible", where Peter and Lois try to make another baby and Stewie tries to kill the sperm before they can fertilize an egg.

For a time there was no concrete evidence to support this outrageous claim, so Chris wisely decided to confirm it as fact. Multiple times.

[21:08] [11:36:35 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: have you ever tasted your own semen
[21:08] [11:37:42 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: KEEP IT SECRET, but I actually have; I recycle my semen
until I get together with my Sweetheart (you) for the first time.
[21:08] [11:38:10 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: ohhhh.. so that's why you do it in a cup
[21:08] [11:38:38 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: yes; after recycle, I rinse the cup and dispose of it.
[21:10] [11:40:03 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: where did you come up with the idea of swallowing
your own semen to recycle it after you cummed? Was it on a sex site or your own idea?
[21:10] [11:40:13 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: MY OWN IDEA.
[21:12] [11:41:23 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: IMHO, it's often unsatisfying to me upon swallowing,
because it's not being truly enjoyed by my Sweetheart.

'''FACT''': If swallowing is "often unsatisfying" for Chris, that means that sometimes [[homos|it ''is'' satisfying]].

Not convinced? Try this:

{{quote|Uh, no, I don't think so, uh, because I've done that [drinking semen after masturbating], it's called "recycling it." Yeah, so it's basically recycling so, like uh, so he doesn't necessarily lose it. I mean, 'cause you know, if you think of it as a waste if you banged it out and then you, uh and then you flushed it down the commode or leave it in the condom in the garbage can...Though personally, I've been getting sick of swallowing my own, so lately I've been disposing of them.|Chris, [[Mumble 8|Mumble chat, 17 February 2009]]}}

[[Image:Recycle.jpg|thumb|right|Yes, he really does it...]]

When [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] described a youthful adventure (c. [[Pre-1980#1940s|1948]]) from his youth to [[Emily]], Chris blurted out ''" I'd been hanging around in hi- inside him while he was taking that trip!"''<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>, which implies that he believes the sperm cell that became him in mid-1981 had existed for over thirty years, and had presumably been ejaculated and recycled by his father many, many times. Although, some might argue that's the reason for Chris's [[Chris and Reality|insanity]] to this very day.

''Still'' not convinced? Chris made a [[April 16 Fetish Vids|video]] for [[Ivy]] of himself drinking his jizz, which [[Clyde Cash]] leaked on 16 April 2009. Chris had previously alleged that his semen would take on the flavor of any sort of fruits or sweets he recently consumed. So eating strawberries would lead to strawberry flavored semen and eating chocolate would lead to chocolate flavored semen. Ivy wanted him to test this theory. She requested he drink his semen and compare it to chocolate syrup. In the video, Chris explains that he doesn't have any chocolate milk [sic] handy. Instead, he mixed it with some orange Fanta, completely missing the point of her request was to compare the flavor.

Just to make sure everyone on Earth knows about it, Chris later made a [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|video]] admitting and justifying the existence of the cum-guzzling footage.

{{quote|I recycle my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate--I'm not ashamed to admit it--as a lot of guys, I'm sure, have done the same thing in their time. Anyway, uh, basically I--yeah, into the cup and--yeah, I recycle it. So that that way I won't lose any, uh, [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|unborn]] [[Reginald Chandler|children]]. So then I can--then I can also still have a good number of...a good semen count. Keep maintain that by recycling it.|Chris, defending the rights of the unborn, 28 April 2009}}

Chris has some advice for all you men out there too:

{{quote|And depending on the taste of it, uh, to the original owners...of the--their respective semen, uh, it's a good idea to recycle, but if, uh, you don--if you don--if you feel uncomfortable, uh, doing it or it tastes bad to you, then, uh, then you don't have to do it.|Chris, [[Chris and his ego|giving everyone his permission to not swallow semen]], 28 April 2009}}

Questions remain about his recycling plan. If he doesn't want to lose even a single unborn child, does that mean he plans to eventually father millions of children? Is he really dumb enough to believe [[Biology|his navy will survive digestion]]? (That's a rhetorical question.) And what happens to the comeuppance he wants to leave in his sweetheart's mouth? Does that magically teleport back where it came from, or can women get pregnant from oral sex? The world may never know.

In the Kacey calls, Chris has also suggested interest in drinking his semen for arousal:

[[File:Heathchris.png|thumb|left|He's bad news.]]
[[File:Autographed Photo 9.jpg|thumb|Heaven in a can.]]
{{quote|And then you know what, I'm going to lick it, I'm gonna lick it off your face, and then we're gonna share it in our tongue like tongue sharing MOMENT!|Chris, [[Kacey Phone Call]], after describing how he would titfuck Kacey}}
{{Clear}}

In [[Mailbag 30]], Chris announced that he had [[Mailbag_30#Chris quit guzzling cum|kicked the habit]], although the validity of this statement is questionable at best, considering his [[List of Chris's lies|track record]] for telling the truth.

===Fapcup===

[[Image:Fapcup.jpg|thumb|left|Wild FAPCUP appeared!]]
[[Image:Fapcup original.jpg|thumb|The original Fapcup in action.]]

{{quote|So yeah anyway, well, pump it down with one or both of my hands at the moment until I feel, until I feel the sensation... where I feel I'm about to lose it, and then it all, it all just the stuff, yeah, yeah, some of my semen comes out. I don't - I don't like to make a mess, so I-... so I-- when I come I have a '''clean plastic cup''' [emphasis added] by my side and I just make sure to put all of my semen in the cup there.|Chris on the fapcup<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20110119074320/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/User:OrangeMarmalade#I_am_perverted</ref>}}

'''Fapcup''' is [[troll]] slang for the plastic cup Chris used to drink his own [[semen]].

In [[Mailbag 30]], published on New Year's of [[2010]], Chris claimed he no longer drinks his own semen.<ref>[[Mailbag 30#Chris quit guzzling cum]]</ref>

==Donation==
While Chris might have learned that swallowing semen has no effect on sperm count, he remains concerned about his fertility and how to maintain it. This unease became acute in 2014 when he realized that he had a "female soul," and became obsessed with getting a sex-change operation. While he wanted to become a woman as soon as possible, he would first need to produce his God-promised daughter [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]]. This required him to find an external receptacle for his sperm, either a medical facility or a surrogate mother. Deeply confused as usual, he either believed that he would still have pseudo-parental rights after the donation; or he cared only about fulfilling God's promise, not actual maternal responsibilities.

What made this transition even more urgent was the collapse of his relationship with [[Catherine]]. While the details are currently murky, the erosion of their relationship in the second week of October seems to have convinced him that she might not become his [[Sweetheart]] and be willing to bear Crystal. Therefore, he would need to find an alternative route to Crystal's conception, and fast, so that he could lop off his Ugly Growth as soon as possible.

Chris therefore made several efforts to donate his sperm, all of which failed. Some time in the fall, he applied to be a sperm donor at Fairfax Cryobank. His application was rejected on 12 November, which he revealed on Facebook a week later. Typically, he blamed the facility for discriminating against autistic individuals, denying that [[autism]] is a hereditary condition.

{{quote|There is no such thing as a 100% healthy individual with 100% healthy DNA, so the sperm bank is lying to its recipients when they "guarantee" their sperm. There is no way to reliably figure out which combinations of DNA from sperm and egg will likely give which results. Everybody is carrying something; so why discriminate against me, and by extension, other autistic people?

Their whole "your DNA is no good- begone!" explanation is utter bullshit.|Chris, Facebook, 20 November 2014<ref>[[November 2014 Facebook Posts]]</ref>}}

Saddened, he turned to his gal-pal Renee, informing her, "My donor application got rejected. So, I'm stuck in searching for a woman to have my daughter (if not Catie)." He magnanimously decided against putting this burden on her, a woman he had known for about a month. "I would ask you, but you're going through a LOT right now, and I wouldn't want to bother you about it."<ref>[[Open Relationship E-mails|Renee E-mails]]</ref>

He then turned to '''VoyForums'''(http://www.voy.com), a nationwide free public message board. On 20 November he posted:

{{quotebox|
'''Date Posted:''' 00:30:39 11/20/14

'''Author:''' Christine Weston Chandler (Happy)

'''Subject:''' <3 Ruckersville/Charlottesville, VA, USA, able sperm donor for lesbian couples.

Hello, ladies. I am a female, lesbian soul, trapped in a born male body, or a Lesbian Transwoman, if you will. I want to help out in my LGBT community by dontating my essence to lesbian couples. It is Totally Awesome that y'all can legally marry in VA now. Anyhow, I am game for helping in Artificial or Natural (preferred) Insemination. I am a good person, and great in getting to know as well. I also would like to be an active parent for the child(ren), if permitted. I am a really caring individual. And I am very serious in my donating. Please, shoot me an email for your serious inquiries and whatnot; I will be happy to provide my more direct contact information via email in response as well.}}

Here we see that his desire to make a daughter conveniently overlaps with his fantasies of a three-way lesbian fuckfest and actually having a relationship.

In [[February 2016]], it was revealed that Chris had been storing his semen in plastic containers delicately located in his fridge for safe keeping, right next to his family's food. <ref>[[Chris's Specimen Sample]]</ref> This method of cryopreservation, however, doesn't work.

To date, no one has taken Chris up on his offer, and his sperm remains within his [[Chris and health|accursed]] male body. It is possible that the HRT he has been taking since 2015 destroyed what was left of his fertility and sex drive, speculation which is supported by [[All Star|his third sex tape]] showing that he had difficult getting an erection in spite of masturbating for three minutes straight. In light of the [[Affair with Mother|incest]] case, however, it is possible that he stopped taking his HRT for [[COVID-19|various reasons]], and thus regained his natural sex drive.

==Fan Videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
|name = 1991 PSA: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle Featuring Chris Chan???
|ytid = ssADXdLsXSc
|stardate = 8 Dec 2021
|maker = sheWIND
}}

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
|name = Chris' Frozen Cream Commercial (1982)
|ytid = Yy8c46_p-tY
|stardate = 3/11/2022
|maker = [https://www.youtube.com/c/ColeoIsCooleo ColeoIsCooleo], [https://www.youtube.com/c/Solidjj Solid JJ], [https://www.youtube.com/c/JavaJake Java Jake]
|info = Announcer & Editing by ColeoIsCoolio, Chris voice acting by Solid JJ, and design & 3D modeling by Java Jake. Check out [https://youtu.be/IXu7H-mRqmE Cole's upload].
}}

== Sources ==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Mass debating]]
*[[April 16 Fetish Vids]]

{{Love quest}}
{{Health}}
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]
[[Category:Things Chris likes]]