CWCki - User contributions [en]

Bob Chandler

2010-08-17T17:42:44Z

LiquidChrisForever: grammar

: ''"'''Bob'''" redirects here. For the troll occasionally known as Bob, see [[Robert Simmons V]].''

{{quote|This ain't my time yet.|Bob laughing at death <ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|Emily Date]]</ref>}}

[[Image:Chrischansdad.jpg|thumb|Bob is old. He makes sure to let you know that]]
[[Image:DemonicLumberjack.jpg|thumb|'''The Internet Lumberjack''' in his Final Form]]

'''Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.'''<ref>[[Blanca E-mails#Chris likes Blanca|Email to Blanca]]</ref> (4 September 1927<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html#P155</ref>–very, very soon) is [[Chris|Chris's]] father. '''Bob''' became a firm favorite with [[trolls]] due to Chris's intense dislike of him and Bob's infamous cameo when [[Bob Walks In|he walked in on Chris fapping]]. His nickname, the "[[Internet]] Lumberjack", comes from this incident.

While loathed by and estranged from his other children and step-child, Bob is still viewed as a better parent than his wife [[Barbara]], due to him being somewhat concerned with Chris's current status as a [[virgin with rage]], and the fact that he occasionally tries to guilt him into being more considerate by bringing up the fact that he's devoted 28 years to raising a selfish manchild. Of course, Chris is unfazed by these attempts.

To date, Bob has conversed with numerous trolls. Thanks to his tendency to yap on, more information has become known.

==Biography==
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|Bob is a pretty "old fashioned" type of guy]]

===Service and education===

Bob was born in Fort Worth, Texas<ref>[[Prank calls]]</ref> and raised in Alabama.<ref name="About">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#About Bob (7:18 - 16:45)]]</ref>

Bob was drafted after World War II and placed in the Signal Corps. There, he learned how to install valve systems, switchboards, and telephones. When he got out, he couldn't get a job and so went to college on the G.I. Bill.<ref name="About" />

Since he figured he'd get "swallowed up" at a big college, Bob picked a small college to study Pre-Engineering for two years. He was also in a band and learned a lot about music. He then moved onto Auburn University, a big college, to earn his engineering degree.<ref name="About" /> As an engineer, he never learned to spell properly.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#The Date Begins (4:47 - 7:17)]]</ref>

===Career===

Bob worked for Western Electric for 40 years. Using skills learned in the army, he built for the company their first automatic [something] (it's unclear what Bob says here). General Electric heard about it and offered him a job in upstate New York. Since New York is too cold for Bob, he moved away after three years, working in North Carolina for some time.<ref name="About" /> He worked with both Goodrich and Goodyear.<ref name="PSN 37" />

With General Electric, Bob was responsible for at least seven patents. [[Barbara]] claimed, in an e-mail to [[Miyamoto]], that because of Bob's influence in the computer world, the NES "might not have arrived so soon" (despite video game technology actually being pioneered by Ralph Baer).<ref name="Barbara" />

As examples of Bob's accom-PLISH-ments, as Chris would say, he automated a steel mill for rolling steel for cars, a paper mill for papers into the form of Kleenex, warehousing, railroads, and tanker ships. He designed scooters, die casting machines, and machines for producing plastic products.<ref name="About" /> A fact that both Chris and Barbara have bragged about is that Bob designed controls for plastic water [container] molding machines.<ref name="About" /><ref name="Barbara">[[Miyamoto Saga#Barbara]]</ref>

===World consciousness===

[[Image:0012-BobbyReading.jpg|thumb|Bob learning how to cut that Internet down]]

On the other hand, Bob himself is proud of his "natural inclination for logic," although he is "inundated" by all his designs and whether he did good for the world.<ref name="About" />

Speaking of the world, Bob has been interested in it since he was 10, and has become very world conscious as a believer in the United Nations. He began by collecting foreign stamps in the 1930s. He has collected 15,000–20,000 LPs from various genres and cultures.<ref name="PSN 37" /> Bob traveled the world in his day for business and [[china|pleasure]].

Politically, Bob identifies as a Republican, and did not vote for [[Barack Obama]] in the 2008 presidential election.<ref>[[Prank calls]]</ref>

In a potentially damaging moment on 18 [[February 2009]], Bob doubted the existence of [[Molvanîa]], [[Julie]]'s fictional country of origin.<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]]</ref> However, he continued talking under the assumption that Molvanîa was under Russian control.<ref name="PSN 37">[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7]]</ref>

===Health and late life===

[[Image:LumberjackTapestry.JPG|thumb|Robert had Medieval English ancestry]]

Bob lives on social security and General Electric pension.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref> He hasn't really had people to chat with (he loves to ramble if the person shows some slight interest), so he sits around, listens to music,<ref name="PSN 37" /> and takes care of the garden inside the greenhouse. With a 1970s stereo system set up in the greenhouse, he goes to "swing with the music" on his swing there.<ref name="Raising" />

Bob has had two triple bypasses and four heart attacks. He wears a pacemaker. He attributes his long life to the [[Cherokee]] in him. His uncles and grandfather all lived to 90-100.<ref name="PSN 37" />

A major question in the troll community is what will happen if and when Bob dies before Barbara.

===What about Bob?===

[[Image:Bobbetter.jpg|thumb|"Now will you PLEASE let me get back to God of War 3???"]]

On 1 March 2010, Chris [[Twitter|Twittered]] that Bob had been taken to the hospital in the early morning for congested [sic] [[Wikipedia:Heart failure|heart failure]]. Chris seemed confident that his father would come home shortly. Considering Bob's age, lifestyle, and long history of heart disease, [[Chris and death|Chris does not seem to grasp the seriousness of heart failure in an elderly man]]. Bob is the only thing keeping [[14_Branchland_Court|the Chandler household]] from imploding, and as such, trolls and white knights alike wished him the best.

[[Image:Bobbed.jpg|thumb|Apart from the dying heart]]

In the month following Bob's hospitalization, Chris was remarkably quiet on the subject. Information about his condition was hard to come by, as we only learn something [[Ego|once it has inconvenienced Chris enough for him to come online and complain about it]]. Statistically, congestive heart failure is not as immediately fatal as its name implies.<ref>[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Congestive_heart_failure Congenital Heart Failure on Wikipedia]</ref> But again, Bob's age, prior heart attacks and lifestyle made this a serious matter.

Chris's videos over the month of March made no mention of Bob at all. Staying true to his painfully predictable nature, Chris instead lost a [[The_Wallflower|girlfriend he never had]], [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|made racial slurs and death threats to a cartoon character]], and [[F Abstinance|raged against abstinence]]. But no mention of his ailing father.

A poster on [http://legi0n.789chan.org/cwc/ /cwc/] claimed to have contacted Chris via PSN regarding Bob. He posted a [http://www.cogsdev.org/w/images/9/9b/Bobbetter.jpg screen capture] purportedly of Chris's response, saying, "He is doing much better, thank you." [[Image:King.jpg|thumb|"Know this, Robert. Thy demise shall be a Whopper!"]]Another contacted Chris via email and got a response saying, "Yes, my father is healthy and safe." He is clearly neither, but this was at least proof that Bob hasn't joined the Whites-Only section of Heaven just yet. In late May, Chris finally made [[Some Favored Comedians|a brief mention]] in a public video that his father was "alive and well," with no further elaboration on his condition.

Whether he is on the road to recovery or has returned home to die is still unknown. If Bob is dying, it is highly unlikely that Chris would be told. Apart from one-line responses from Chris, the best way to stay updated on Bob's health might be to [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/ read the Charlottesville] and [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/greenenews/ Greene County obituaries]. And God help him if he [[Aunt_Corina|dies on pancake day]].

Bob is currently out of hospital, living at home and back [[prank calls|arguing with himself]]. The elderly man with heart failure is still [[Coffee_Place|eating at Burger King]]. The Grim Reaper is said to have been pleased by this news.

On August 10th, [[Matthew_Noble_call|a phone call]] took place between Bob and Alec Benson Leary, who posed as an employee of [[GAMe_PLACe|The GAMe PLACe]]. Discussing Chris's June trespassing citation, it was discovered that Chris hadn't told his parents about the incident (surprise, surprise). Chris posted [[6_June_2010|a whiny video]] about the incident the night that it happened, which is ''still'' on his YouTube channel. Yeah, that's how negligent Bob is.

==Relationships==

===Previous family===

Bob is out of contact<ref name="Cole2">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref> with his son [[David Alan Chandler]] and daughter [[Carol Suzanne Chandler]], who both lead successful careers. For example, Chris did not know he had a niece named [[Savannah Chandler|Savannah]] until she was 8 years old.<ref>[[CWC's Diary#January 2004]]</ref>

===Barbara===

[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|With [[barbara Chandler|Barb]]]]

To continue with the music theme, Bob and [[Barbara]] met in a bar on a karaoke night. Barbara was there with friends and Bob was singing.<ref name="Mumble 3.5">[[Mumble 3.5]]</ref> According to Chris, Barbara did the [[How to Talk to Girls|pursuing]]: "She chased him down the hall." This is probably why he figures that he could get away with being passive in terms of courtship. In contrast, [[Cole|Cole's]] friend Chuck, who worked at the bar, has a vivid memory of them being drunk retards.<ref name="Cole2" /> They got married in 1980.<ref name="Mumble 3.5" />

According to Chris, Barbara has not had sex with Bob for at least two decades. They have been sleeping in separate rooms for the past few years.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref> This is possibly due to an attempt to avoid spawning another subhuman freak like Chris.

===Cole===

Bob married Barbara when her son [[Cole]] was 17, around the time Cole left to lead his own life.

Cole feels that Bob's bitterness worked to separate his relationship with his mother. Cole will celebrate<ref name="Cole2">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref> "when that fuck Bob finally drops."<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|Email from Cole to Chris]]</ref> Cole said that he and Bob share a mutual hatred,<ref name="Cole2" /> though we have no evidence yet that Bob hates Cole. In the least, it is certain that Bob knows Cole doesn't like him.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref>

===Chris===

{{quote|Get away from the Internet!
I'm cutting it down, right now.|Bob Chandler, Internet lumberjack.}}

[[Image:0106-ChristianWDad.jpg|thumb|"You tell them that you fell down some stairs or else I'm cutting down your [[Nintendo]]."]]

Bob wishes Chris was more interested in the world. He tried to teach Chris, but he thinks (and rightly so) that Chris doesn't understand countries and continents beyond what he's seen on [[TV]], and only can associate with the places he's been in Virginia.<ref name="PSN 37" />

Despite Bob's occasional frustration over Chris's actions, he seems to have somehow bought into the theory that Chris is tormented by a [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica|complex network of enemies spanning the entire world]] simply due to the [[Chris_and_his_ego|success]] that he has earned from his very [[fail|popular]] Sonichu franchise.<ref name="Church">[[Church_audio]]</ref><ref name="Noble">[[Matthew_Noble_call]]</ref>. Bob actually believes that Chris has accomplished significant goals in his adult life.<ref name="Prank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNHIbffirxU&feature=player_embedded</ref>

Bob's joke that [[Barack Obama]] would paint the White House black as soon as he became president influenced Chris to draw it in ''[[Sonichu 8]]''.

{{quote|well, my father is a major stressor against me; starts arguements[sic], annoys me, rarely washes his hands after restroom breaks (lord knows I've tried to encourage him to wash numerous time, and rarely succeeded.|Chris, [[IRC (31 December 2008)]]}}

After meeting with Bob personally and finding him to be quite pleasant and amicable, it became obvious that he wasn't "starting arguments", as Chris asserts, but rather most likely rightfully criticizing Chris's behaviors and encouraging to better himself, which would involve work, and Chris is too lazy to do that. It has been reported Bob will mention to him that he has taken care of his [[autistic]] ass for 27 years and so Chris should be more grateful. But selfish and apathetic Chris couldn't give two shits, figuring that they're ''obligated'' as parents to take care of him, seeing no reason he should demonstrate any foreign concepts like "love", "support", "gratitude", and "willingness to help".

Chris has said specifically that he doesn't have to love his father, but has to respect him.'''<ref>[[Mumble 1#Transcript|Mumble Chat 1]]</ref>

==Audio and video appearances==

In every appearance, Bob has proved himself to be better at charming Chris's [[sweetheart]]s than Chris himself.

* Circa [[1993]]: Bob appears briefly behind Chris from 0:26 - 0:36 in the news report of Chris's [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]].
* 14 [[February 2009]]: [[Bob Walks In]] to Chris [[mass debating]].
* 18 [[February 2009]]: In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]] and [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7|3.7]], Bob rambles to [[Julie]].
* 15 [[March 2009]]: Bob [[Church audio|talked]] to [[Robert Simmons V]] at [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]] while [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Chris went to shit himself]].
* [[March 2009]]: Bob chaperoned Chris on his date with [[Emily]].
* 27 [[March 2009]]: Bob gets intruded by Chris in the [[Tour of Christian's House]], but is not visible.
* 27 [[August 2009]]: [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|Bob enters Chris's room]] and scolds him for making the [[Tour of Christian's House|house tour video]], (correctly) fearing that if someone saw the house as it was, they would be evicted (Uncut version only). This is a momentous occasion, showing some awareness on the part of the Chandlers that the filth and squalor they live in is a health hazard. This video subsequently off a wave of emails and calls to the Greene County Health Department, masterminded by trolls who hoped to realize Bob's fear of eviction, but the campaign was seemingly unsuccessful.
* [[November 2009]]: Bob and [[Barb|Snorlax]] make a brief appearance at the end of the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]].
* 15 [[August 2010]]: Bob gets a call from the GAMe PLACe and is informed of Chris' actions earlier in the year. He then goes on a tangent about how Chris has been tormented by everyone ever since he was banned, and then demands Michael Synder's information. Barbara also appears at the end of the call.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Thehell.jpg|"The hell is this crap?"
Image:0009-ChristopherChristmas2.jpg|Looking at the presents, it's sometime between 1982 and 2010.
Image:0011-ChristopherBobXmas.jpg|Bob at [[Christmas]] time.
Image:0014-YoungerFather.jpg
Image:0032-BobAtRestraunt.jpg|The epitome of handsome.
Image:0038-AuntCorinaAndDad.jpg|Bob with [[Aunt Corina]].
Image:0062-NewChristian&Dad.jpg|Notice Chris's discomfort.
Image:0120-BobbyBehindBars.jpg|Bob won't let a fence get in the way of cutting down Chris's Internet.
Image:0230-ChristianAndDadInClass.jpg|Bob: fashion icon.
Image:0626-BobbyInGarden.jpg|When Bob isn't arguing with Chris or cutting down his Internet, he enjoys gardening.
</gallery>
</center>

==Sauces==

{{Fan Art|chris=Bob Chandler}}

<references />

{{People}}
{{Not_Jerks}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Bob}}
[[Category:Family Members]]

Bob Chandler

2010-08-17T14:59:57Z

LiquidChrisForever: Added a paragraph to the Chris section

: ''"'''Bob'''" redirects here. For the troll occasionally known as Bob, see [[Robert Simmons V]].''

{{quote|This ain't my time yet.|Bob laughing at death <ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|Emily Date]]</ref>}}

[[Image:Chrischansdad.jpg|thumb|Bob is old. He makes sure to let you know that]]
[[Image:DemonicLumberjack.jpg|thumb|'''The Internet Lumberjack''' in his Final Form]]

'''Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.'''<ref>[[Blanca E-mails#Chris likes Blanca|Email to Blanca]]</ref> (4 September 1927<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html#P155</ref>–very, very soon) is [[Chris|Chris's]] father. '''Bob''' became a firm favorite with [[trolls]] due to Chris's intense dislike of him and Bob's infamous cameo when [[Bob Walks In|he walked in on Chris fapping]]. His nickname, the "[[Internet]] Lumberjack", comes from this incident.

While loathed by and estranged from his other children and step-child, Bob is still viewed as a better parent than his wife [[Barbara]], due to him being somewhat concerned with Chris's current status as a [[virgin with rage]], and the fact that he occasionally tries to guilt him into being more considerate by bringing up the fact that he's devoted 28 years to raising a selfish manchild. Of course, Chris is unfazed by these attempts.

To date, Bob has conversed with numerous trolls. Thanks to his tendency to yap on, more information has become known.

==Biography==
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|Bob is a pretty "old fashioned" type of guy]]

===Service and education===

Bob was born in Fort Worth, Texas<ref>[[Prank calls]]</ref> and raised in Alabama.<ref name="About">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#About Bob (7:18 - 16:45)]]</ref>

Bob was drafted after World War II and placed in the Signal Corps. There, he learned how to install valve systems, switchboards, and telephones. When he got out, he couldn't get a job and so went to college on the G.I. Bill.<ref name="About" />

Since he figured he'd get "swallowed up" at a big college, Bob picked a small college to study Pre-Engineering for two years. He was also in a band and learned a lot about music. He then moved onto Auburn University, a big college, to earn his engineering degree.<ref name="About" /> As an engineer, he never learned to spell properly.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#The Date Begins (4:47 - 7:17)]]</ref>

===Career===

Bob worked for Western Electric for 40 years. Using skills learned in the army, he built for the company their first automatic [something] (it's unclear what Bob says here). General Electric heard about it and offered him a job in upstate New York. Since New York is too cold for Bob, he moved away after three years, working in North Carolina for some time.<ref name="About" /> He worked with both Goodrich and Goodyear.<ref name="PSN 37" />

With General Electric, Bob was responsible for at least seven patents. [[Barbara]] claimed, in an e-mail to [[Miyamoto]], that because of Bob's influence in the computer world, the NES "might not have arrived so soon" (despite video game technology actually being pioneered by Ralph Baer).<ref name="Barbara" />

As examples of Bob's accom-PLISH-ments, as Chris would say, he automated a steel mill for rolling steel for cars, a paper mill for papers into the form of Kleenex, warehousing, railroads, and tanker ships. He designed scooters, die casting machines, and machines for producing plastic products.<ref name="About" /> A fact that both Chris and Barbara have bragged about is that Bob designed controls for plastic water [container] molding machines.<ref name="About" /><ref name="Barbara">[[Miyamoto Saga#Barbara]]</ref>

===World consciousness===

[[Image:0012-BobbyReading.jpg|thumb|Bob learning how to cut that Internet down]]

On the other hand, Bob himself is proud of his "natural inclination for logic," although he is "inundated" by all his designs and whether he did good for the world.<ref name="About" />

Speaking of the world, Bob has been interested in it since he was 10, and has become very world conscious as a believer in the United Nations. He began by collecting foreign stamps in the 1930s. He has collected 15,000–20,000 LPs from various genres and cultures.<ref name="PSN 37" /> Bob traveled the world in his day for business and [[china|pleasure]].

Politically, Bob identifies as a Republican, and did not vote for [[Barack Obama]] in the 2008 presidential election.<ref>[[Prank calls]]</ref>

In a potentially damaging moment on 18 [[February 2009]], Bob doubted the existence of [[Molvanîa]], [[Julie]]'s fictional country of origin.<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]]</ref> However, he continued talking under the assumption that Molvanîa was under Russian control.<ref name="PSN 37">[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7]]</ref>

===Health and late life===

[[Image:LumberjackTapestry.JPG|thumb|Robert had Medieval English ancestry]]

Bob lives on social security and General Electric pension.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref> He hasn't really had people to chat with (he loves to ramble if the person shows some slight interest), so he sits around, listens to music,<ref name="PSN 37" /> and takes care of the garden inside the greenhouse. With a 1970s stereo system set up in the greenhouse, he goes to "swing with the music" on his swing there.<ref name="Raising" />

Bob has had two triple bypasses and four heart attacks. He wears a pacemaker. He attributes his long life to the [[Cherokee]] in him. His uncles and grandfather all lived to 90-100.<ref name="PSN 37" />

A major question in the troll community is what will happen if and when Bob dies before Barbara.

===What about Bob?===

[[Image:Bobbetter.jpg|thumb|"Now will you PLEASE let me get back to God of War 3???"]]

On 1 March 2010, Chris [[Twitter|Twittered]] that Bob had been taken to the hospital in the early morning for congested [sic] [[Wikipedia:Heart failure|heart failure]]. Chris seemed confident that his father would come home shortly. Considering Bob's age, lifestyle, and long history of heart disease, [[Chris and death|Chris does not seem to grasp the seriousness of heart failure in an elderly man]]. Bob is the only thing keeping [[14_Branchland_Court|the Chandler household]] from imploding, and as such, trolls and white knights alike wished him the best.

[[Image:Bobbed.jpg|thumb|Apart from the dying heart]]

In the month following Bob's hospitalization, Chris was remarkably quiet on the subject. Information about his condition was hard to come by, as we only learn something [[Ego|once it has inconvenienced Chris enough for him to come online and complain about it]]. Statistically, congestive heart failure is not as immediately fatal as its name implies.<ref>[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Congestive_heart_failure Congenital Heart Failure on Wikipedia]</ref> But again, Bob's age, prior heart attacks and lifestyle made this a serious matter.

Chris's videos over the month of March made no mention of Bob at all. Staying true to his painfully predictable nature, Chris instead lost a [[The_Wallflower|girlfriend he never had]], [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|made racial slurs and death threats to a cartoon character]], and [[F Abstinance|raged against abstinence]]. But no mention of his ailing father.

A poster on [http://legi0n.789chan.org/cwc/ /cwc/] claimed to have contacted Chris via PSN regarding Bob. He posted a [http://www.cogsdev.org/w/images/9/9b/Bobbetter.jpg screen capture] purportedly of Chris's response, saying, "He is doing much better, thank you." [[Image:King.jpg|thumb|"Know this, Robert. Thy demise shall be a Whopper!"]]Another contacted Chris via email and got a response saying, "Yes, my father is healthy and safe." He is clearly neither, but this was at least proof that Bob hasn't joined the Whites-Only section of Heaven just yet. In late May, Chris finally made [[Some Favored Comedians|a brief mention]] in a public video that his father was "alive and well," with no further elaboration on his condition.

Whether he is on the road to recovery or has returned home to die is still unknown. If Bob is dying, it is highly unlikely that Chris would be told. Apart from one-line responses from Chris, the best way to stay updated on Bob's health might be to [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/ read the Charlottesville] and [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/greenenews/ Greene County obituaries]. And God help him if he [[Aunt_Corina|dies on pancake day]].

Bob is currently out of hospital, living at home and back [[prank calls|arguing with himself]]. The elderly man with heart failure is still [[Coffee_Place|eating at Burger King]]. The Grim Reaper is said to have been pleased by this news.

On August 10th, [[Matthew_Noble_call|a phone call]] took place between Bob and Alec Benson Leary, who posed as an employee of [[GAMe_PLACe|The GAMe PLACe]]. Discussing Chris's June trespassing citation, it was discovered that Chris hadn't told his parents about the incident (surprise, surprise). Chris posted [[6_June_2010|a whiny video]] about the incident the night that it happened, which is ''still'' on his YouTube channel. Yeah, that's how negligent Bob is.

==Relationships==

===Previous family===

Bob is out of contact<ref name="Cole2">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref> with his son [[David Alan Chandler]] and daughter [[Carol Suzanne Chandler]], who both lead successful careers. For example, Chris did not know he had a niece named [[Savannah Chandler|Savannah]] until she was 8 years old.<ref>[[CWC's Diary#January 2004]]</ref>

===Barbara===

[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|With [[barbara Chandler|Barb]]]]

To continue with the music theme, Bob and [[Barbara]] met in a bar on a karaoke night. Barbara was there with friends and Bob was singing.<ref name="Mumble 3.5">[[Mumble 3.5]]</ref> According to Chris, Barbara did the [[How to Talk to Girls|pursuing]]: "She chased him down the hall." This is probably why he figures that he could get away with being passive in terms of courtship. In contrast, [[Cole|Cole's]] friend Chuck, who worked at the bar, has a vivid memory of them being drunk retards.<ref name="Cole2" /> They got married in 1980.<ref name="Mumble 3.5" />

According to Chris, Barbara has not had sex with Bob for at least two decades. They have been sleeping in separate rooms for the past few years.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref> This is possibly due to an attempt to avoid spawning another subhuman freak like Chris.

===Cole===

Bob married Barbara when her son [[Cole]] was 17, around the time Cole left to lead his own life.

Cole feels that Bob's bitterness worked to separate his relationship with his mother. Cole will celebrate<ref name="Cole2">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref> "when that fuck Bob finally drops."<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|Email from Cole to Chris]]</ref> Cole said that he and Bob share a mutual hatred,<ref name="Cole2" /> though we have no evidence yet that Bob hates Cole. In the least, it is certain that Bob knows Cole doesn't like him.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref>

===Chris===

{{quote|Get away from the Internet!
I'm cutting it down, right now.|Bob Chandler, Internet lumberjack.}}

[[Image:0106-ChristianWDad.jpg|thumb|"You tell them that you fell down some stairs or else I'm cutting down your [[Nintendo]]."]]

Bob wishes Chris was more interested in the world. He tried to teach Chris, but he thinks (and rightly so) that Chris doesn't understand countries and continents beyond what he's seen on [[TV]], and only can associate with the places he's been in Virginia.<ref name="PSN 37" />

Despite Bob's occasional frustration over Chris' actions, he seems to have somehow bought into the theory that Chris is tormented by a [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica|complex network of enemies spanning the entire world]] simply due to the [[Chris_and_his_ego|success]] that he has earned from his very [[fail|popular]] Sonichu franchise.<ref name="Church">[[Church_audio]]</ref><ref name="Noble">[[Matthew_Noble_call]]</ref>. Bob actually believes that Chris has accomplished significant goals in his adult life.<ref name="Prank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNHIbffirxU&feature=player_embedded</ref>

Bob's joke that [[Barack Obama]] would paint the White House black as soon as he became president influenced Chris to draw it in ''[[Sonichu 8]]''.

{{quote|well, my father is a major stressor against me; starts arguements[sic], annoys me, rarely washes his hands after restroom breaks (lord knows I've tried to encourage him to wash numerous time, and rarely succeeded.|Chris, [[IRC (31 December 2008)]]}}

After meeting with Bob personally and finding him to be quite pleasant and amicable, it became obvious that he wasn't "starting arguments", as Chris asserts, but rather most likely rightfully criticizing Chris's behaviors and encouraging to better himself, which would involve work, and Chris is too lazy to do that. It has been reported Bob will mention to him that he has taken care of his [[autistic]] ass for 27 years and so Chris should be more grateful. But selfish and apathetic Chris couldn't give two shits, figuring that they're ''obligated'' as parents to take care of him, seeing no reason he should demonstrate any foreign concepts like "love", "support", "gratitude", and "willingness to help".

Chris has said specifically that he doesn't have to love his father, but has to respect him.'''<ref>[[Mumble 1#Transcript|Mumble Chat 1]]</ref>

==Audio and video appearances==

In every appearance, Bob has proved himself to be better at charming Chris's [[sweetheart]]s than Chris himself.

* Circa [[1993]]: Bob appears briefly behind Chris from 0:26 - 0:36 in the news report of Chris's [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]].
* 14 [[February 2009]]: [[Bob Walks In]] to Chris [[mass debating]].
* 18 [[February 2009]]: In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]] and [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7|3.7]], Bob rambles to [[Julie]].
* 15 [[March 2009]]: Bob [[Church audio|talked]] to [[Robert Simmons V]] at [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]] while [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Chris went to shit himself]].
* [[March 2009]]: Bob chaperoned Chris on his date with [[Emily]].
* 27 [[March 2009]]: Bob gets intruded by Chris in the [[Tour of Christian's House]], but is not visible.
* 27 [[August 2009]]: [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|Bob enters Chris's room]] and scolds him for making the [[Tour of Christian's House|house tour video]], (correctly) fearing that if someone saw the house as it was, they would be evicted (Uncut version only). This is a momentous occasion, showing some awareness on the part of the Chandlers that the filth and squalor they live in is a health hazard. This video subsequently off a wave of emails and calls to the Greene County Health Department, masterminded by trolls who hoped to realize Bob's fear of eviction, but the campaign was seemingly unsuccessful.
* [[November 2009]]: Bob and [[Barb|Snorlax]] make a brief appearance at the end of the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]].
* 15 [[August 2010]]: Bob gets a call from the GAMe PLACe and is informed of Chris' actions earlier in the year. He then goes on a tangent about how Chris has been tormented by everyone ever since he was banned, and then demands Michael Synder's information. Barbara also appears at the end of the call.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Thehell.jpg|"The hell is this crap?"
Image:0009-ChristopherChristmas2.jpg|Looking at the presents, it's sometime between 1982 and 2010.
Image:0011-ChristopherBobXmas.jpg|Bob at [[Christmas]] time.
Image:0014-YoungerFather.jpg
Image:0032-BobAtRestraunt.jpg|The epitome of handsome.
Image:0038-AuntCorinaAndDad.jpg|Bob with [[Aunt Corina]].
Image:0062-NewChristian&Dad.jpg|Notice Chris's discomfort.
Image:0120-BobbyBehindBars.jpg|Bob won't let a fence get in the way of cutting down Chris's Internet.
Image:0230-ChristianAndDadInClass.jpg|Bob: fashion icon.
Image:0626-BobbyInGarden.jpg|When Bob isn't arguing with Chris or cutting down his Internet, he enjoys gardening.
</gallery>
</center>

==Sauces==

{{Fan Art|chris=Bob Chandler}}

<references />

{{People}}
{{Not_Jerks}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Bob}}
[[Category:Family Members]]

Talk:Father Call

2010-08-17T00:18:04Z

LiquidChrisForever:

Transcription

Easiest way to do it

Sign up for 5 minute intervals.

GO.

I will try and bash out the second ten minutes at least right now. Too caffeined to sleep. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 09:48, 11 November 2009 (CET)
*Fuck it. 20-30 minutes it is as well. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 10:22, 11 November 2009 (CET)
:*Just in case anyone was looking for a second opinion, I can confirm that yes, he did indeed say "I don't like to leave an unfinished project finished." Also the stammering here is of an unprecedented magnitude. I give up until I can return to this shit while intoxicated. (Also for enterprising transcribers, I recommend [http://www.nch.com.au/scribe/ Express Scribe], lets you set hotkeys for stop/start/rewind, pretty handy.) [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 10:57, 11 November 2009 (CET)

Good article, bad name. Seriously, call it "Kacey's Parent Call" or something like that. This article should be about the call, not the dad. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 11:59, 11 November 2009 (CET)
* Or we could just copy the transcript into its own article and use this page to write about Matt once the transcript gives folks some raw material to work with. Either way. (Also, apropos of nothing, I'm gonna hear "IT WAS APPLEBEE'S" over and over in my dreams once I finally get to sleep.) [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 12:05, 11 November 2009 (CET)
:* If the transcript for this audio is done, go ahead and remove both the incomplete and transcription tags. And thanks for the tip about Express Scribe, by the way. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 05:13, 12 November 2009 (CET)
::* Oh, no, it's not done. I just started working backwards from the end a bit last night because somebody else was uploading stuff from the beginning at the time and I didn't want to repeat their effort. There's about 40 minutes left in the middle still, between the 50- and 90-minute marks. But that shouldn't be hard to knock off fairly soon. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 05:23, 12 November 2009 (CET)
:::* I only noticed after I'd written above that there was actually a gap in the middle of the transcript. (I'd been skipping around some.) I dare say you're inhuman to have transcribed even this much. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 05:28, 12 November 2009 (CET)
::::* Whew. It's done. All y'all feel free to correct and link whatever, I'm sure I missed more than a couple typos. And if you can explain what the hell that "WARRIORS" shit means I'd love to know. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 09:05, 12 November 2009 (CET)
:::::* Well done with the transcription. I cleared up some small spelling errors. Nothing big. --[[User:Hayate666|Hayate666]] 12:30, 12 November 2009 (CET)

I just want it to be known that I don't think I've ''ever'' hated Chris as much as I do now. [[User:Ayvuir|Ayvuir]] 04:08, 13 November 2009 (CET)

==Chris talks to Kacey and Liquid==

Bryan Bash just dropped this on /cwc/. It's pretty insane.

http://legi0n.789chan.org/cwc/res/490.html --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 19:48, 11 November 2009 (CET)
*If it's the call I think it is, make a new page for that. That's a new classic. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:48, 11 November 2009 (CET)

== Category for phone calls? ==

I was just thinking, should there be a category for phone calls such as this, [[Kacey and Liquid Call]] and [[Kacey Phone Call]]? Or is there not enough of them for one to be necessary? --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 23:06, 11 November 2009 (CET)
*Sure, why not? They'll be more phone calls in the future, I tell you what. Well, maybe not from Kacey but other trolls. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:10, 11 November 2009 (CET)

== Who here thought of... ==

<hexbawx>...Chris as Caboose and the Dad as Sarge, from Red vs. Blue? [http://roostertooths.com/transcripts.php?show=rvb&season=3&ep=39 The similarities are striking].</hexbawx> --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 11:25, 12 November 2009 (CET)
:*Actually, I'd think of 'em more as Chris as GRIF or perhaps and unholy fusion of Grif and Caboose.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 18:54, 12 November 2009 (CET)
:*The difference being that Caboose is lovably dumb and funny, and Grif is a hilarious kissass, and Chris is Chris. Chris lacks little things like "intentional hilarity" and "witty dialog" to make the comparison work better. [[User:Ensign disposable|Ensign disposable]] 21:39, 12 November 2009 (CET)
:*I think Kasey's dad sounded like the new Batman from ''Batman: The Brave and The Bold'' to me. Come to think of it, he kinda sounded like Diedrich Bader in general. --[[User:UJ1985|UJ1985]] 07:30, 14 November 2009 (CET)
:* Am I right in thinking that Kacey's "Dad" and Liquid Chris are one and the same? [[User:Glorious Tentacularity|Glorious Tentacularity]] 15:45, 21 November 2009 (CET)

== Step 2 - wikify==
Great job on the transcription, now it needs to be wikified with links to appropriate articles. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:33, 12 November 2009 (CET)

:What for? Because of this blue text the links are practically invisible. --[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 20:53, 12 November 2009 (CET)
:*Should still have wiki links. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:18, 14 November 2009 (CET)

*Seriously, this needs to be wikified. Fuck, I might end up doing this myself. But someone, please beat me to it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:00, 9 February 2010 (UTC)

== Fun Fact ==

The Chandlers have a riding lawnmower in their yard. If it actually works, mowing the lawn would be as easy as sitting on your ass and enjoying a cold drink. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 09:39, 20 November 2009 (CET)
*What's the source of that? If you can find it, then it'd be worth to make a note (maybe like a footnote) and point out that Chris is so lazy that sitting on his ass is a chore for him. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:18, 21 November 2009 (CET)
*You can see it in [[CWC Fighter]], its in the background and you can kinda see it next to [[son-chu|chris's car]] while Chris fails at imitating martial arts.[[User:Flyingdingo0827|Flyingdingo0827]] 05:23, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
* He walks past it in the yard tour too, I think. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 06:53, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

==Kacey's "father"==

Shouldn't we mention that Kacey's "father" is just another troll? Otherwise, if someone comes to this page and doesn't read the whole transcript or listen to the phone call, they'll probably think that Chris actually spoke with Kacey's dad. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 20:00, 21 November 2009 (CET)
*Why the fuck would someone think that 1) this guy is actually a 50 year old man who is actually Kacey's dad and that 2) someone's dad would actually bother talking to Chris for so long? Of course he's a troll, as is Kacey and 99% of the people Chris interacts with. What difference would it make? For canon purposes, Kacey's father talked to Chris and this is the call between them.
:The thing is, trolling Chris can be a bit theatrical at times. People establish personas, storylines, motives, etc. behind trolling Chris and people love it and people can't believe Chris actually falls for it (Chris once remarked how his life was a soap opera and I recall being amazed but not surprised given that he's delusional enough to believe that it's perfectly reasonable to be in a situation where he was in a love triangle with him, a girl from 5000 miles away, and a rapist meanwhile trying to get his game idea published with Nintendo). If we get too meta and go with the total truth, you'd just have an entire wiki about basement dwellers, weaboos, and [[User:CrassCrab|Internet sociopaths]] who get off to trolling a manchild. Of course trolls are trolling Chris but that's not canon. Not just targeting you Llort, but after your comment and seeing some "commentary" on the effectiveness of Jimmy Hill in the Jimmy Hill article, I felt this needed to be said. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:14, 21 November 2009 (CET)
*Is the reason for not revealing that it's a troll to prevent Chris from finding out if he ever discovers this page? --[[User:Doomknight|Doomknight]] 09:35, 30 November 2009 (CET)
*Kacey's dad's performance is good up to about the point he starts talking about being in Desert Storm onward. Carrying his dead/dying buddy all the way back to base? Seems fishy but okay. Digging his mother out of the 9/11 rubble? Uh, nah, don't think so. Not breaking a sweat from running ten miles? Come on, man.
He just starts stretching it thinner and thinner just to keep Chris talking. Fortunately, his complete and utter lack of a believable performance if anything increases the impact of the call. Not once does Chris make any call-out of the increasingly obvious bullshit, which either suggests he's genuinely naive (lol) towards literally ANYthing regarding the real world, or he's so desperate for a Sweetheart to Build from the Ground Up that's he's willing to eat up a solid 2:20 of demeaning insulting garbage just for a chance to hook up with a girl he met a single time who he's been told several times is already engaged.
:*The last post was written by [[User:CorbeauNoir]]. Please don't forget to sign your posts!!! --[[User:Fuckingstupid|Fuckingstupid]] 16:24, 13 December 2009 (CET)
:*The biggest giveaway that it was a troll was that the Dad already knew about Chris thinking standing up is exercise when Chris made no mention of it. --[[User:AntonImaus|AntonImaus]] 19:37, 6 March 2010 (UTC)

==An Idea That Might Be Funny==
Based on the texture of Kacey's dad's voice (or the troll portraying him, but let's keep up decorum) I think it might be funny if we got a picture of Brock Samson from ''The Venture Brothers'' and put that on the article with the caption "Artist's interpretation of Mr. Devoria." Seriously, he sounds like Patrick Warburton. --[[User:Manwithoutabody|Manwithoutabody]] 2:27, 16 December 2009 (CEST)
*[[CWCki:DOITFAGGOT|DO IT, FAGGOT]]--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:39, 17 December 2009 (CET)
Done and done. --[[User:Manwithoutabody|Manwithoutabody]] 12:49, 20 December 2009 (CEST)

== I reformatted the shit out of this. ==

I'll change it back if everybody hates it, but I won't apologize.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 05:53, 1 March 2010 (UTC)
*It's awful...AWFULLY GOOD. Seriously, more transcripts should be like this. Subheadings though, I have an issue with in general for reasons I won't go into now but nonetheless, this is a very good reformatted version. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:33, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

==Somehow this guy pisses me off more than BlueSpike==

Even knowing the "father" is a troll doesn't keep me from wanting to kick him in the balls. I guess he's just a little too close to the way arrogant old people with a bit of authority are in real life. [[User:Niggoducks|Niggoducks]] 05:38, 3 July 2010 (UTC)
:* I think thats the genius of all this. Throughout his entire life, Chris has been lacking a firm authority figure to put him in his place (his parents pampered him, his teachers put him on the Honor Roll, etc.). The only closest thing to an authority figure in his life has been, appropriately, a group of mall security guards. However, this call definitely is one of the most interesting pieces of content out of all the material on this website. It proposes the concept of Chris actually being talked down to by someone he is required to respect (when people on the internet do it to him, he can just visibly ignore them, but when Kacey's Dad does it he is forced to act like he cares) and all of the hilarity that would follow. Needless to say, if Chris had actually grown up in the household of an arrogant ex-military republican, I would think that he may have actually become a much more mature and independent person than he currently is. --[[User:LiquidChrisForever|LiquidChrisForever]] 14:28, 15 August 2010 (PDT) 

::*Edit: After writing this, it dawned upon me that Chris' father actually is an arrogant ex-military republican, and yet somehow Bob has still bought into the idea that Chris is a poor soul tormented by the entire world for the sole reason of him being a very successful and creative superstar due to Sonichu. I honestly don't know what to think now. --[[User:LiquidChrisForever|LiquidChrisForever]] 17:18, 16 August 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Father Call

2010-08-17T00:17:55Z

LiquidChrisForever:

Talk:Father Call

2010-08-15T21:28:30Z

LiquidChrisForever:

User:LiquidChrisForever

2010-08-07T14:18:32Z

LiquidChrisForever:

Imagine there's no Sonichu 
It's easy if you try 
No recolors or ripoffs 
Creativity soaring high 
Imagine all the people 
Living for today 

Imagine there's no Chandlers 
It isn't hard to do 
Nothing to troll or flame for 
And no manchildren too 
Imagine all the people 
Living life in peace 

You may say that I'm a dreamer 
But I'm not the only one 
I hope someday you'll join us 
And the world will be as one 

Imagine no possessions 
I wonder if you can 
No need for PS3's or Tugboats 
A brotherhood of man 
Imagine all the people 
Sharing all the world 

You may say that I'm a dreamer 
But I'm not the only one 
I hope someday you'll join us 
And the world will live as one

User:LiquidChrisForever

2010-08-07T14:17:29Z

LiquidChrisForever: Created page with "Imagine there's no Sonichu It's easy if you try No recolors or ripoffs Creativity soaring high Imagine all the people Living for today Imagine there's no Chandlers It isn't hard..."

Imagine there's no Sonichu
It's easy if you try
No recolors or ripoffs
Creativity soaring high
Imagine all the people
Living for today

Imagine there's no Chandlers
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to troll or flame for
And no manchildren too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for PS3's or Tugboats
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

Grace Baptist Church

2010-08-07T13:52:57Z

LiquidChrisForever: grammar fix

[[Image:Grace Baptist Church.jpg|thumb|Grace Baptist Church, [[Charlottesville]]]]

'''Grace Baptist Church''' was [[Chris]]'s church until he got kicked out on 17 [[March 2008]].

[[Lordsillynipples]] had emailed Chris in September 2008 asking him why he got kicked out of Grace Baptist Church, and Chris responded with the following: "Pastor John Hartless did not like my views I've expressed in [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|my video I did on my 25th Birthday]], and he found the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] page."<ref name="ED Talk page">[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Talk:Chris-chan/Archive4#Church_Search The ED Chris-Chan article talk page, Archive 4]</ref> Taking into account the fact that Chris started his "war" with ED on the sixteenth, as well as his constant threats to [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|use his congregation as a personal army]], it's not hard to deduce that he linked Pastor [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean‎|H[e]artless]] to his ED page in the hope that he'd sic his flock on us and wound up getting himself banned. However, it should be obvious to any non-manchild that this plan [[CWC Update 29 July 2009|backfired]], proving that [[godjesus|God]] indeed does exist.

When publicly asked about his old church a little more than a year later, Chris claimed that the pastor "did a background check" and merely found a few images of girls in bikinis on Chris's [[Facebook]] page.<ref name="CWCiki, Mailbag 14">[[Mailbag 14]]</ref>

Chris now attends [[Wesley Foundation Methodist Church]], which seems to tolerate his bullshit more than Grace Baptist Church did.

==Sauce==
<references />

==See also:==
*[[Chris and religion]]

{{Places}}
[[Category:Places]]

Chris and fashion

2010-06-25T00:05:56Z

LiquidChrisForever: Based on the gallery below

[[Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|thumb|Fashion passes. Style is forever.]]

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a somewhat peculiar taste in '''fashion'''. Although he is willing to spend thousands of dollars on video games, action figures, [[My Little Pony]]s and [[Kimmi|sex dolls]], Chris is very stingy when it comes to shopping for his clothes, which are exclusively purchased secondhand at thrift stores like Salvation Army and Goodwill. Therefore, the only clothes he owns are colorful, collared shirts and undersized rugby shirts that have been marinating in his [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|bodily stench and fluids]] for the past decade. Since most of them are decorated with horizontal stripes, they only make him look [[Obesity|fatter]].

In [[Mailbag 42#The rugby shirt he wore for 3 days in a row isn't a favorite or anything|Mailbag 42]] it was revealed that at least one (the "Advice Dog" shirt) and possibly all of his shirts were purchased by his cruel, cruel [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] so people will notice the fact that he's [[Autism|"special"]] and [[Kick the Autistic|treat him with sympathy]]. Alternatively, the reason could also be the fact that the Chandlers aren't exactly what you'd call "fashion savvy". Despite his mother not being the one who dresses him anymore, Chris still chooses to wear these shirts possibly out of a strong aversion to "change," which is a common trait shared among autistic people. It has been debated amongst trolls that Chris would probably look somewhat-almost normal if he only wore a fucking t-shirt every now and then (sans video game/cartoon characters).

== Childhood ==
[[Image:Ernie.jpg|thumb|Ernie also enjoys "The Classic".]]

In his youth, Chris set the general tone for years to come with many striped polo and tee shirts and khaki pants. The only difference compared to today is that he sometimes even dared to wear single-colored tee shirts or shirts with his [[Sonic the Hedgehog|favorite game]] and television characters on them. The only article of clothing he currently owns that doesn't follow the "long-sleeved, colorful clown suit" theme is the Pokémon T-shirt that he has owned since he was 19. Being yellow, it does not look good on him.

== Trademark clothing ==

[[File:Chrischan5.jpg|thumb|left|Artist's vision of Chris's typical outfit, featuring the Horizontal Horror.]]

Chris's typical outfit consists of:

* His favorite shirt, a striped/weirdly patterned rugby shirt, which is so tight that it accentuates his voluptuous, masculine bosoms. This is the shirt that Chris almost invariably draws himself wearing in the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]].
* His [[Medallions of Fail|medallions]] (sporadically) / his [[High School Ring]]
* A pair of [[Pedo-Glasses]] attached to the Glasses Chain of Fail.
* Jeans or khaki slacks. Chris's jeans typically define his rear end to a disturbing level — he may be wearing jeans cut for women's figures, or he may simply still wear pants his gut long ago outgrew.
* [[Belt Buckle of Fail]]
* Alternatively, a green terrycloth bathrobe with a mismatched (of course) black belt.
* On occasion, a dark suit jacket, perhaps for the many [[Chris and death|funerals that plague his existence]].
* Recently, a [[sports bra]] to keep previously mentioned bosoms in check.

The newest addition to his wardrobe is the [[Fridays After Five|I Enjoy Vagina shirt]].

==The "[[Ian Brandon Anderson|IBA]]" outfit==
In mid-[[2009#June|June 2009]], roughly around the time he made friends, Chris temporarily decided that his current look was old hat. He got rid of many of the striped shirts (mostly because he couldn't fit into them anymore) and grew a terrible goatee.

The reformed Chris's wardrobe consisted of:

*Sunglasses over normal glasses (Glasses Chain of Fail remains)
*T-shirt over long sleeved shirt.
*Goatee.
*Tattoo sleeves
*A black vest that is too small for his girth.
*[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]

Unconfirmed reports state that he was seen walking around downtown [[Charlottesville]] blasting Guns 'n' Roses from a pocket radio and trying to pick up women.

His new attire was first properly presented to the world in the [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video.

Soon afterward, however, he went back to sporting his traditional clownshirts, and claimed that he was pressured into making the Rollin' and Trollin' video.

==The "Gay Trucker" outfit==
[[Image:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Notice how his pose in this picture is eerily reminiscent of his pose in [[ShecameforCWC.jpg]].]]

After he made a promise to leave the internet in the spring of 2010, Chris threw away his clown shirts, ditched the medallion, and picked up a new wardrobe in an attempt to look like a normal person. The result is a modified version of the IBA outfit. It has been observed that Chris tries to look like a bad boy, but he ends up looking like a [[gay]] trucker, hence the trolls' term for his new wardrobe.

The only way he could make it look gayer is by combining it with his [[muscle bra]]. Which, unfortunately, he has. [[Fridays After Five|And in public.]] At this point, going back to the [[Sonichu Medallion]] would actually ''improve'' his chances of picking up girls.

[[File:EnjoyVagaina.jpg|thumb|left|Deftly combining what Chris [[Coke|has too much of]] and what he [[China|will never have]].]]

With the arrival of the gay trucker outfit also came an interest in T-shirts that boldly express Chris's interest in sex, often in exceedingly tasteless ways. The first clear look at one of these shirts was in a [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|profoundly disturbing video]] leaked in late [[April 2010]] which featured Chris wearing a [[parody]] shirt that read "[[homos|Mount and do me]]". That said, the video was made for a potential sweetheart that Chris desperately wanted to fuck, leaving open the possibility that Chris didn't intend to dress like that outside his [[Chris's room|bedroom]].

Chris destroyed any hope of that being the case on 18 [[June 2010]] when he wore a shirt that said "Enjoy Vagina" to a public, family-oriented concert. He then topped himself later, by pulling that shirt over his head, and standing around in his [[muscle bra]], which he had written "WANT WOMAN!" on. The common belief is that these tasteless, sexually themed shirts are the next evolution of the [[attraction sign]], a way for him to inform potential mates that he is both straight and available without ever having to talk to people.
{{clear}}

==Theory of fashion==
The clothes that Christian chooses seem almost like a costume for him, especially his infamous striped shirt. Given that he is [[autistic]], observers often speculate that he may have difficulty with identifying things visually, including himself. In [[Sonichu 7]], he alluded to having to take time to study his appearance in a mirror, possibly wearing the shirt in question. Either way, Christian seems to regard his shirt as an integral part of his identity in the same way that [[trolls]] do.

His fashion sense has shown itself to be evolving in the last year, but moving in cycles. In [[2010]] he seemed to have ditched the Sonichu Medallion and moved into what could be described as a more edgy, hip, aggressive look. His success at being so is on par for course with the rest of his attempts at things.

Of note, during his conversation with [[Kacey]] while posing as [[Liquid Chris]] he claimed to also own a striped shirt like the "impostor". He expressed much joy at the fact that it was red, white, and blue, implying a patriotic view of the colors.

==Wardrobe==
Below is a gallery of most of Chris's wardrobe, along with links to the videos they appeared in:
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Christshirt1.png|"The Classic" [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_27th%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_18th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_19th%2C_2009|4]] [[CWC's_"It's_All_Coming_Back_To_Me"|5]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|6]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009|7]] [[SingStar_Challenge#Watch|8]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 1|9]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 4|10]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 22nd, 2009|11]] [[Show_RESPECT_to_me,_"C"CWC|12]] [[Sign_Destruction_Video|13]] [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|14]]
Image:Christshirt4.png|"The Advice Dog" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_24th%2C_2008|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_6th%2C_2009|3]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_10th%2C_2009|4]] [[12_January_2010|5]] [[14_January_2010|6]] [[What's_the_Name,_Christian_Chandler,_C_H_R_I_S_C_H_A_N|7]] [[15 January 2010|8]] [[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L|9]]
Image:Christshirt3.png|"[[Liquid Chris|The Impostor]]" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_9th%2C_2008|1]] [[Chop_Chop_Onion's_Rap_Showdown|2]] [[Magical Man Potion|3]]
Image:Christshirt5.png|"The Napoleon" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_17th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_4th%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_27th%2C_2009|3]] [[Challenge_for_Clyde_II|4]] [[15_October_2009|5]] [[9_December_2009|6]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|7]] [[22 January 2010|8]] [[I am Alive|9]]
Image:Christshirt6.png|"The Racing Stripe" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_January_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_March_10th%2C_2009|2]] [[Congrats,_Jack_Black|3]]
Image:Christshirt7.png| "The Power Ranger" [[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_August_3rd%2C_2008|1]] [[CCWC's_Final_Warning_to_the_Second_CWC|2]] [[LOOK_at_the_truth!|3]]
Image:Christshirt8.png| "The Dunwich Horror" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_12th%2C_2009|1]] [[More_for_the_crabs|2]] [[ECV_00081|3]] [[Bunny_Hop|4]] [[11052009_Kacey,_I_Love_You,_and_I_Need_You|5]] [[CWC address to Royal Board|6]] [[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.|7]] [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|8]]
Image:Christshirt10.png|"The Two-Face" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_23rd%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain%27s_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|2]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_3rd%2C_2009|3]]
Image:Christshirt11a.png|"The Poké-Master" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_August_6th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]
Image:Christshirt12.png|"The Horizontal Horror" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_8th%2C_2009|1]]
Image:Christshirt13a.png|"The Jerkop" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_September_13th%2C_2008|1]] [[CWC_Music_Video_Holding_Out_For_a_Hero|2]]
Image:Christshirt14.png|"The Greasy Flag" [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_February_6th%2C_2009|1]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_9th%2C_2009|2]] [[I_am_devoted_to_My_Sweetest_Ivy|3]] [[Matthew_5_27%2C_CWC_Confessions|4]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_April_17th%2C_2009|5]] [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_May_22nd%2C_2009|6]] [[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts|7]] [[9_October_2009|8]] [[Warning_-_Naughty_Women_;)|9]] [[Old_Time_Rock_and_Roll_on_Shredwud|10]] [[Brutal_Legend|11]] [[3_December_2009|12]]
Image:Christshirt18.png|"The Star Fleet Captain" [[CWC More Than A Feeling|1]]
Image:Christshirt17.png|"The Scuderia Autistirarri" [[Chris's Big Night Out|1]] [[10 September 2009|2]]
Image:Christshirt19.png|"The Flag-Waving Patriot" [[Chris_Destroys_His_Vibrator|1]] [[A CWC Audition|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|3]] [[CWC_only_accepts_IN-PERSON_FEMALE_Encounters|4]] [[Challenge for Clyde|5]] [[Brutal Legend Plus|6]] [[For_Chris#IBA.27s_video|7]] [[IPods_Down_and_Listen_Up|8]] [[Hello,_Juffalo|9]] [[9 February 2010|10]]
Image:Christshirt20.png|"The Captain Falcon" [[Down with Asperchu|1]]
Image:Christshirt21.png|"The DangerStripe" [[This was my fault|1]] [[Address to my CWCipedia SysOP|2]]
Image:Christshirt22.png|"The Cyclone Joker" [[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_January_21st,_2009|1]] [[CWC_Callout_for_Miss_Emily_and_Stephanie|2]] [[CHRIS!!!_CHANDLER!!!|3]] [[A message to the Trolls|4]] [[Don't Mess With Me|5]]
Image:ChrisShirt43.png|"The Swamp Monster" [[Captain's Log, Stardate December 20th, 2009|1]]
Image:Christshirt23.png|"The Traffic Light" [[Chris_Chan's_Public_Announcement|1]] [[A_Sonichu_Day|2]] [[Shout_out_to_Fans_in_Hospital|3]] [[To Clyde and Jack.MOV|4]] [[Kill De Jack|5]]
Image:ChristshirtPoke.png|"The Manchild" [[Chris dispels videogame rumors|1]]
Image:Christshirt28.png|"The Rugby of Shame" [[Christian's Update 11 September 2008|1]]
Image:Parappashirt.png|"The [[PaRappa_the_Rapper|PaRappa]] Shirt" [[51_50|1]]
Image:sportsbra.png|"The [[Muscle_bra|Muscle Bra]]" [[04232010_-_Autism_Awareness_%26_Men_Should_NEVER_be_Topless|1]]
Image:sportsbra2.png|"The Muscle Bra 2" [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]
Image:Christshirt27.png|"The Dirty Dashiki" [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 8th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|2]] [[CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 4th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 26th, 2009|5]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|6]] [[Challenge for Clyde II|7]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|8]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|9]] [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|10]] [[I am Alive|11]]
Image:Christshirt37.png|"The [[Homos|Mount and Do Me]]" [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|1]]
Image:Christshirt25.png|"The [[Duck|Duckie]] Shirt" [[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|1]] [[Secret Weapon|2]] [[YouTube Finale|3]] [[SingStar Challenge Round 5|4]]
Image:Christshirt26.png|"The Shamrock Shake" [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 28th, 2008|2]] [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls|3]]
Image:Christshirt29.png|"The Shamrock Stripes" [[Chris Sex Videos|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 7th, 2009|2]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 12th, 2009|3]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 13th, 2009|4]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 20th, 2009|5]] [[Clyde Cash the kid video|6]] [[For Kacey II|7]] [[To Clyde Gregg|8]] [[For Chris II|9]]
Image:Christshirt31.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare" [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|1]]
Image:Christshirt32.png|"The Burgundy Nightmare Redux" [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009|1]] [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|2]]
Image:Christshirt33.png|"The Bumblebee" [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|1]] [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|2]]
Image:Christshirt35.png|"The Intimidator" [[Chris Calls Clyde Out|1]] [[I Love You Kacey|2]] [[10242009|3]] [[29 January 2010|4]] [[C-Ya Later|5]] [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|6]]
Image:Christshirt38.png|"The Rainbow Flag" [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|1]]
Image:Christshirt30.png|"The Big Green" [[We're Being Watched|1]] [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|2]]
Image:Christshirt41.png|"The White Trash" [[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009|1]] [[War Paint Video|2]] [[Some Favored Comedians|3]]
Image:Christshirt45.png|"The Happy Jack" [[CWC Dare|1]] [[June062010.MOV|2]]
Image:Christshirt46.png|"The Bordeaux Butcher" [[Apology to Emily|1]]

</gallery>
</center>

{{Illustrations}}

== Wrist warmer ==

[[Image:Wrist Warmer.jpg|thumb|Wrist warmer]]

Ever wonder what that thing is behind Chris's neck?

{{quote|Yes, it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there.|Chris<ref>Email from Chris posted in old [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]] thread 162</ref>}}

Chris most likely wears it as a counter to [[Wikipedia:Sensory defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], a condition common among autistics, in which a normally harmless sensation directly triggers a fight-or-flight reaction.

== Cosplaying Chris ==

[[Image:Chris chan cosplay.jpg|thumb|Christ, you can tell this world is totally fucked up when people start cosplaying AS Chris!!!]]

Chris appeared in his [[Pokémon|Ash Ketchum]] costume from around [[2000]] to [[2004]]. It was originally created as a Halloween costume in either [[1998]] or [[1999]].<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> He proudly wore it to [[The GAMe PLACe]] every week<ref>[[Mimms]] [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/pvcc/viewtopic.php?p=17515#p17515 post] on [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]]</ref> and to the 2004 [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] convention. With it, he won a costume contest against 5 kids dressed up as Team Rocket. The prize was a t-shirt.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 2</ref> For a while, he resurrected this look for his profile picture on [[The Hook Cafe]] and eventually evolved into the Gay Trucker.

The Ketchum-style trainer outfit consists of:
* Faux-denim vest
* Cut up gardening gloves
* Pokémon League ballcap
* Fanny-pack (Also known as a 'belly-bag' and a 'bum-bag' to Britfags)
The ensemble is usually accompanied by a yellow ''[[Pokémon]]'' tee-shirt, or white ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic Heroes]]'' tee-shirt underneath (see gallery below).

Chris can no longer wear this costume due to his [[obesity|obscene girth]].

<center><gallery>
Image:0501-CWCAsh2.jpg
Image:0502-CWCAsh3.jpg|HOT ROD 138, I c-ch-choose you~!
Image:0503-CWCAsh4.jpg
Image:0647-CWCAshAnime.jpg|This is the most depressing thing ever seen by man kind.
Image:501-100 0534 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting 501-100 0534 end_of_the_skype_highlighting.JPG|A sketch of the costume. It's so brilliant, its voluptuous lines and shading caresses your eyes like a sensual piece of chocolate dipped velvet...
Image:502-CWCsAshVest.JPG|Dat hat is a-pretty-a-goddamn dirty
</gallery></center>

==Sauce==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Liquid Chris

2010-06-22T21:15:38Z

LiquidChrisForever: Duplicate reference

{{Improve|massive reorganization|Expand the subtopics under the ''Liquid Saga'' for great justice. Add details and citations}}

{{Protip|If you're going to call Chris "Ian", do so only in the context of this saga.}}

[[Image:CChanSonichuCWC.jpg|thumb|If you look hard, you can see the TRUE, HONEST Sonichu medallion.]]

'''Liquid Chris''' (born 24 [[February 1982]]) is the '''TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler''' (ORIGINAL IDENTITY - DO NOT STEAL) and creator of the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, [[Sonichu]].

==Prologue==
[[June 2009]] was a busy month for [[Christian]] (henceforth '''Solid Chris'''), with new highs and lows. Solid was getting out of the house more and [[Chris's Big Night Out|knocking back some Long Islands with a new group of acquaintances]]. He was given the keys to his shiny new [[CWCipedia]] and had his YouTube account "CChanSonichu" compromised. Yes, he was [[Rollin' and Trollin']] indeed.

{{quote|And I'm nowadays wearing a vest and improving my image.|Solid Chris, [[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]}}

==Liquid Saga==
[[Image:Torture.jpg|Liquid Chris torturing the imposter|thumb]]

====A challenger appears====

:''See also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#Antebellum|Liquid's Antebellum Videos]]''

At the end of the month a new YouTube account, [http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CChanSonichuCWC], appeared with a simple premise: that the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler (henceforth '''Liquid Chris''') was back online after a long absence, during which he lost his account to hackers, so all the weirdness on "CChanSonichu" was the work of hacking trolls, and he announced that he was ready to resume posting HONEST content on his new account. This new CWC posted four more videos, much of which were parodies of earlier videos by Solid Chris.

{{quote|How else would I get fan art, if I was not the original creator of Sonichu?|Liquid Chris, [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Update:_I_am_Still_the_Real_Christian_Weston_Chandler_Despite_LIES_AND_SLANDER._Also.2C_Some_Fan_Art|3 July 2009]]}}

Notably, Liquid Chris sported:
*A paper Sonichu medallion
*A striped shirt (brown)
*Pedo-glasses
*Obesity (by means of a stuffed shirt, later removed)
*Autism

which of course made him almost [[Chris and Reality|''indistinguishable'']] from Solid Chris! Solid himself made no comment, probably because he didn't notice the new videos among the chatter of all the other trolling. The alternative — that Solid just ignored them — is far too reasonable to consider.

====Ian Brandon Anderson====
:''Main Article: [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]
:''See also: [[The July 10th_Messages]]
:''See also: [[Rollin' and Trollin']]

What really cranked this up to eleven was a chain of events that started with Solid Chris getting his "CChanSonichu" channel back: First, Solid posted a series of videos on 10 [[July 2009]] where he "called out" three trolls by their YouTube handles, and dropped their docs (well, dropped "supposed states of residence"). That resulted in the permanent banhammer for "CChanSonichu."

The next piece fell into place when he posted his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video on his new YouTube account, "IBAChandler." When it hit Encyclopedia Dramatica, newfags everywhere momentarily lost control of their bowels, thinking they'd been trolled by a grand master. Trolls, however, did what trolls do best: they started riffing on it. Pretty quickly, YouTube comments popped up referring to Solid as "Ian Brandon Anderson." Such was the price of success for Solid's small drop of near win, in his sea of epic fail: he had delivered unto his enemies a weapon that they'd use for months.

Even then, the damage control from that episode alone would probably have kept him from noticing Liquid's videos. Until that is, Liquid raised the stakes in an attempt to get Solid's attention.

===CWCivil War begins===
[[Image:Honest-and-true.jpg|thumb|right|TRUTH and HONESTY established by the state of [[Virginia]]!!]]
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#The CWCivil|Liquid's CWCivil War Videos]]''

The war began on 21 July, when Liquid uploaded a [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Now_Selling_the_OFFICIAL_and_ORIGINAL_SONICHU_Merchandise_of_CWC.2C_NO_FAKERIES_OR_IMPOSTORY|video]] that reeled Solid in, hook, line and sinker, having sold Sonichu Merchandise with [[Samantha Thaddeus]] at Otakon. A rebuttal was in order:

{{quotebox|DO NOT BUY from the Impostor, "[http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CWCCChanSonichuCWC]". HE IS CRAPPY, and his Nasal Voice is JUST DOWNRIGHT AWFUL.

Also, if I wanted to buy PAPER, I'd go to [[Wal-Mart]] and buy 500 FULL 8.5 X 11 Sheets for about 5 dollars!

HIS CHURCH? HE MUST LIVE IN FRICKIN' OHIO with "[[Julie]]"; NEVER DRIVES GREATER THAN 7 Hours JUST TO EVEN VISIT [[Wesley Memorial]] in [[VIRGINIA]].

F*** HIM TO HELL!<ref>[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Solid also took time out from his busy schedule to post threats on Liquid's YouTube comments:

{{quotebox|'''The Final Showdown'''

Hey, DUMBASS! [[Chris and his ego|YOU WISH YOU WERE ME]]! I would say YOU are Stuck... IN MINUS-SECOND-GEAR!

I am Calling YOU OUT!

[[14 Branchland Ct.]] [[Ruckersville]], VA
BEFORE August 2, 2009.
If you really WANT to be me, then Come Face Me.

oh, BTW, YOUR NASAL VOICE IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "[[Naive|NAIVE]]", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.

But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS.

You are a Nerd and a Whimp!

Have a good day. 
Christopher Christian Weston Chandler<ref>[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Even at this point, Solid Chris still may have let this all go, as he was simultaneously getting blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]], who was holding his [[PSN]] account to ransom. But as that wound down, Liquid caught Solid's eye again, by picking up on the Ian Brandon Anderson meme:

{{quotebox|Hello, again, Loyal Fans,

It is I again, Christian Weston Chandler. NOT Christopher Christian Weston Chandler as EVERYONE KNOWS I Changed my name FROM Christopher to Christian (PS: That Troll, as Some have now Informed Me, his Real Name is IAN BRANDON ANDERSON). Anyway, I am Working Very Hard on Sonichu 9 and Things may be Progressing Heavily with my new TRUE Gal-Pal Kacey and I. Also, Expect more Announcements of this Developing Caliber in the Future.

Stay True.

CWC<ref>[[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Christian_Weston_Chandler.27s_EXCITING_ANNOUNCEMENT_of_SONICHU_and_Addressing_Things.| Christian Weston Chandler's EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT of SONICHU and Addressing Things.]]</ref>}}

==The battleground==

====More Than A Feeling====
[[Image:CWCvsIanGuitar.jpg|thumb|The REAL Chris is not only cute, he can play the guitar!]]
:''See Also: [[CWC More Than A Feeling]]''
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#More_Than_A_Feeling_THE_TRUE_VERSION_by_Christian_Weston_Chandler_.28CWC.29|More Than A Feeling THE TRUE VERSION by Christian Weston Chandler (CWC)]]
For whatever reason, Solid dug up an old video of himself failing at Guitar Hero and dumped it online. Liquid shot back with a TRUE and HONEST rendition on a real guitar.

====Spanish Challenge====
[[Image:Cestnepas.jpg|thumb|Ceci n'est pas une Chris]]
:''Main Article: [[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''
More [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC|video rage]] followed, before Solid attempted a cunning plan:

{{quote|También. Mi presente. Responde en español bueño. ¿Si no que bueño? Tu no eres el verdad. Tu eres el impostor.|Solid Chris, ''[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''}}

The plan backfired when [[CWC_Update_29_July_2009#Liquid.27s_response|Liquid responded more fluently in Spanish, French, German, and Japanese]].

====SingStar Challenge====
[[Image:Tgtdfw4.jpg|thumb|Only one clear choice, choosing the TRUE and HONEST Chris]]
{{Main|SingStar_Challenge}}

{{quote|Alright, Christian, Mr. Brown-Striped Impostor, since you have been able to accept and complete my question challenges, it is time to issue a new challenge.|Solid Chris, ''[[SingStar Challenge]]''}}

[[Fail|And then he shaved his goatee off. Dry. With a safety razor.]]

As expected, the contest went to Liquid and Solid was a sore loser about it. Liquid had a tally of 4 votes in favor, 2 against. He then took his leave from the competition, after announcing a number of personal coups:
*that he'd finally found a true sweetheart, [[Kacey]].
*that he'd landed a job as a Production Manager and Game Designer at Microsoft for a Sonichu game for all consoles.
*that Dark Horse Comics would be publishing his [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comics]], making him even more filthy rich, with the opening of the CWCStore.

And finally, that he had decided to stop battling the Solid, and move out of his parents' house to live in Redmond, Seattle, to continue his happy, successful life.

===SHOWDOWN===
{{Main|SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE}}
{{Quote|You’re breaking my balls here.|Solid, ''[[SHOWDOWN]]''}}
On 9 [[August 2009]], Liquid called Solid up and confronted him over the slanderous lies he was telling on YouTube. Solid tried reason, and when that failed, he threatened to arrest Liquid for identity theft and involve Bob in this debacle.

{{quotebox|If you do not come clean right now, I am going to get my father in on this further, and you are going to get fucking arrested, thrown in jail, and you will not get to live the peaceful, happy life that Kacey and I would like [voice cracks] you to live because Kacey really cares for you MAN!<ref>[[SHOWDOWN]]</ref>}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|B6Q1yFXgdoQ}}
</center>

Of course, this sent Solid completely over the deep end. First, he raged:

{{quote|STOP THAT IMPOSTOR BASTARD WHO HAS BEEN POSING WITH MY NAME, MY ADDRESS, MY PHONE NUMBER, EVERYTHING! STOP HIM! HE DESERVES NOTHING!|Solid Chris, ''[[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!]]''}}

Then, he tried reason:

{{quotebox|The Singstar Challenge was NEVER to verify who was the real Christian Weston Chandler, because everyone on the internet knows that I am, he's the imposter. They should quit encouraging him. And I wish that he would stop his stupid damn dirty game. I don't know what the heck is wrong with his head. [his voice gets higher] He ain't right. He don't even let me get a word in edge-wise. He just keeps going on and on AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ONNNNNNNNN! Worse than my father!<ref>[[The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who]]</ref>}}

And as summer disappeared, so too did Liquid Chris: The apparent victim of foul play. Viewer discretion is advised, as the next video is disturbing.

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|RdshGz_Pvks}}
</center>

Chris's sweetheart, [[Kacey]], was distraught over the event and posted a video confirming Chris's disappearance and announcing her withdrawal from their engagement.

===CWCivil War II: Kacey Boogaloo===
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|SIC SEMPER TRUTH AND HONESTY]]
{{Main|Kacey}}
Liquid Chris reappeared on 15 [[October 2009]] with a new video explaining the trials and tribulations of the past few months, and igniting a heated love triangle with Solid for Kacey's affections.

In the [[Greetings to Kacey's folks|video]] addressed to Kacey's parents, Solid called him "'''the previous Chris'''". In a [[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You|desperate video for Kacey]], Solid called him the "'''other Chris'''" repeatedly.

When the dust had settled, Solid had [[Father Call|offended Kacey's father]] and, through his immaturity, pushed Kacey back into the loving arms of the Real Chris.
{{clear}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|Tn7WNTxCDck}}
</center>

===Epilogue===

Liquid Chris is now married to his beloved heartsweet, Kacey. As the one TRUE and HONEST creator of Sonichu, his artwork and comics are extremely popular and he often attracts many beautiful [[boyfriend-free]] females with his medallions and his [[Gitar of Fail|Guitar of Win]].

Liquid makes mad [[Clyde Cash|cash]] by selling said medallions at Otakon and other [[anime]] [[Anime Mid-Atlantic|conventions]] while voicing Solid in ''[[Fan:Sonichu: The Animated Series|Sonichu: The Animated Series]]''. He has also made several hundred thousand dollars from his two critically acclaimed games, ''[[Pokémon: Lightning Version]]'' and ''Sonichu: The Crystal Chronicles'' for the [[Nintendo]] DS and [[Xbox]] 360, respectively.<ref>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V1gEjtmm9M</ref>
<center>
{{#ev:youtube|AQKzqnatMXw}}
</center>

==Irony==
[[Image:LiquidChrisBelieveInMe.jpg|thumb|BELIEVE]]
IBAChandler has mocked the CChanSonichuCWC on several points:

* [[Speech Impediment|His nasal tone]].
* [[Chris and fashion|His brown striped shirt]].
* [[Chris and Money|Actually making money off Sonichu]].
* [[Fat|His appearance]].

It's a bad sign when one is fighting a mirror, [[Fail|and the mirror is winning.]]

In early August 2009<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009]]</ref>, Solid began to believe that Liquid couldn't be the real Chris because only the real Christian Weston Chandler is a retard who is the laughing stock of the Internet. Therefore, the fact that Liquid isn't trolled and doesn't do dumb shit suggests that he isn't the real Chris. Of course, previously mentioned theories seem to disprove this assertion.

In a further fit of irony, Ian ended up impersonating Liquid in a bizarre attempt to woo Liquid's girlfriend, [[Kacey]].
{{clear}}

== In the comic ==
[[Image:TrueAndHonestCWCArt.jpg|The imposter [[Chris]] stole his famous lecture to the [[Jerkops]] from the real Chris.|thumb|left]]
[[Image:Furryiba.jpg|thumb|Go, [[IBAChandler]], and copycatly sieze [sic] to the extreme!]]

On 17 November, 2009 the TRUE and ORIGINAL Chris-chan made his very first appearance in Ian's [[Sonichu 9]]. Ian, being the slanderous troll that he is, had the nerve to imply that Liquid's name was, in fact, Ian Brandon Anderson, and once again tried to convince everyone that he, Solid was the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of Sonichu.

Of course, since the comic is made by the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler, he would obviously cast the impostor in the comic and call him by his real name. Chris shows much more restraint for Ian than was shown to him in [[Sonichu Special 4]].
{{clear}}

==Fan videos==
{{collapsible
|Not TRUE AND ORIGINAL
|
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ayObshLZQwI}}
| Stardate = 2 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|s1SBdwZDN1k}}
| Stardate = 4 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 3
| video = {{#ev:youtube|dYrgl-otclY}}
| Stardate = 6 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm On Hexbawks. :)]]
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XhENYYmGAeA}}
| Stardate = 25 [[January 2010]]
| Maker = BobbyHillify
| Subject =
| Video Type = Trailer for the upcoming [[Xbox]] game
}}
}}

==See also==
*[[Fan:Two_CWCs|Theories on the nature of the two CWCs]]
*[[Solid Chris]]
*[[Robert Simmons V|Solidus Chris]]
*[[Jimmy Hill]]

==References==
<references/>

== External links ==
*[http://www.youtube.com/cchansonichucwc CChanSonichuCWC YouTube account]
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/The_Real_Chris_Chan The Real Chris Chan] on [[ED]]
*[http://www.hsienko.com/asperchu/index.php?title=Christian_Weston_Chandler Christian Weston Chandler] on [[Asperpedia]]

 {{SingStarChallenge}}
{{Template:The_Cwcivil_War_of_2009}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

Liquid Chris

2010-06-22T21:14:49Z

LiquidChrisForever:

{{Improve|massive reorganization|Expand the subtopics under the ''Liquid Saga'' for great justice. Add details and citations}}

{{Protip|If you're going to call Chris "Ian", do so only in the context of this saga.}}

[[Image:CChanSonichuCWC.jpg|thumb|If you look hard, you can see the TRUE, HONEST Sonichu medallion.]]

'''Liquid Chris''' (born 24 [[February 1982]]) is the '''TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler''' (ORIGINAL IDENTITY - DO NOT STEAL) and creator of the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, [[Sonichu]].

==Prologue==
[[June 2009]] was a busy month for [[Christian]] (henceforth '''Solid Chris'''), with new highs and lows. Solid was getting out of the house more and [[Chris's Big Night Out|knocking back some Long Islands with a new group of acquaintances]]. He was given the keys to his shiny new [[CWCipedia]] and had his YouTube account "CChanSonichu" compromised. Yes, he was [[Rollin' and Trollin']] indeed.

{{quote|And I'm nowadays wearing a vest and improving my image.|Solid Chris, [[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]}}

==Liquid Saga==
[[Image:Torture.jpg|Liquid Chris torturing the imposter|thumb]]

====A challenger appears====

:''See also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#Antebellum|Liquid's Antebellum Videos]]''

At the end of the month a new YouTube account, [http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CChanSonichuCWC], appeared with a simple premise: that the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler (henceforth '''Liquid Chris''') was back online after a long absence, during which he lost his account to hackers, so all the weirdness on "CChanSonichu" was the work of hacking trolls, and he announced that he was ready to resume posting HONEST content on his new account. This new CWC posted four more videos, much of which were parodies of earlier videos by Solid Chris.

{{quote|How else would I get fan art, if I was not the original creator of Sonichu?|Liquid Chris, [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Update:_I_am_Still_the_Real_Christian_Weston_Chandler_Despite_LIES_AND_SLANDER._Also.2C_Some_Fan_Art|3 July 2009]]}}

Notably, Liquid Chris sported:
*A paper Sonichu medallion
*A striped shirt (brown)
*Pedo-glasses
*Obesity (by means of a stuffed shirt, later removed)
*Autism

which of course made him almost [[Chris and Reality|''indistinguishable'']] from Solid Chris! Solid himself made no comment, probably because he didn't notice the new videos among the chatter of all the other trolling. The alternative — that Solid just ignored them — is far too reasonable to consider.

====Ian Brandon Anderson====
:''Main Article: [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]
:''See also: [[The July 10th_Messages]]
:''See also: [[Rollin' and Trollin']]

What really cranked this up to eleven was a chain of events that started with Solid Chris getting his "CChanSonichu" channel back: First, Solid posted a series of videos on 10 [[July 2009]] where he "called out" three trolls by their YouTube handles, and dropped their docs (well, dropped "supposed states of residence"). That resulted in the permanent banhammer for "CChanSonichu."

The next piece fell into place when he posted his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video on his new YouTube account, "IBAChandler." When it hit Encyclopedia Dramatica, newfags everywhere momentarily lost control of their bowels, thinking they'd been trolled by a grand master. Trolls, however, did what trolls do best: they started riffing on it. Pretty quickly, YouTube comments popped up referring to Solid as "Ian Brandon Anderson." Such was the price of success for Solid's small drop of near win, in his sea of epic fail: he had delivered unto his enemies a weapon that they'd use for months.

Even then, the damage control from that episode alone would probably have kept him from noticing Liquid's videos. Until that is, Liquid raised the stakes in an attempt to get Solid's attention.

===CWCivil War begins===
[[Image:Honest-and-true.jpg|thumb|right|TRUTH and HONESTY established by the state of [[Virginia]]!!]]
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#The CWCivil|Liquid's CWCivil War Videos]]''

The war began on 21 July, when Liquid uploaded a [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Now_Selling_the_OFFICIAL_and_ORIGINAL_SONICHU_Merchandise_of_CWC.2C_NO_FAKERIES_OR_IMPOSTORY|video]] that reeled Solid in, hook, line and sinker, having sold Sonichu Merchandise with [[Samantha Thaddeus]] at Otakon. A rebuttal was in order:

{{quotebox|DO NOT BUY from the Impostor, "[http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CWCCChanSonichuCWC]". HE IS CRAPPY, and his Nasal Voice is JUST DOWNRIGHT AWFUL.

Also, if I wanted to buy PAPER, I'd go to [[Wal-Mart]] and buy 500 FULL 8.5 X 11 Sheets for about 5 dollars!

HIS CHURCH? HE MUST LIVE IN FRICKIN' OHIO with "[[Julie]]"; NEVER DRIVES GREATER THAN 7 Hours JUST TO EVEN VISIT [[Wesley Memorial]] in [[VIRGINIA]].

F*** HIM TO HELL!<ref>[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Solid also took time out from his busy schedule to post threats on Liquid's YouTube comments:

{{quotebox|'''The Final Showdown'''

Hey, DUMBASS! [[Chris and his ego|YOU WISH YOU WERE ME]]! I would say YOU are Stuck... IN MINUS-SECOND-GEAR!

I am Calling YOU OUT!

[[14 Branchland Ct.]] [[Ruckersville]], VA
BEFORE August 2, 2009.
If you really WANT to be me, then Come Face Me.

oh, BTW, YOUR NASAL VOICE IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "[[Naive|NAIVE]]", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.

But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS.

You are a Nerd and a Whimp!

Have a good day. 
Christopher Christian Weston Chandler<ref>[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Even at this point, Solid Chris still may have let this all go, as he was simultaneously getting blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]], who was holding his [[PSN]] account to ransom. But as that wound down, Liquid caught Solid's eye again, by picking up on the Ian Brandon Anderson meme:

{{quotebox|Hello, again, Loyal Fans,

It is I again, Christian Weston Chandler. NOT Christopher Christian Weston Chandler as EVERYONE KNOWS I Changed my name FROM Christopher to Christian (PS: That Troll, as Some have now Informed Me, his Real Name is IAN BRANDON ANDERSON). Anyway, I am Working Very Hard on Sonichu 9 and Things may be Progressing Heavily with my new TRUE Gal-Pal Kacey and I. Also, Expect more Announcements of this Developing Caliber in the Future.

Stay True.

CWC<ref>[[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Christian_Weston_Chandler.27s_EXCITING_ANNOUNCEMENT_of_SONICHU_and_Addressing_Things.| Christian Weston Chandler's EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT of SONICHU and Addressing Things.]]</ref>}}

==The battleground==

====More Than A Feeling====
[[Image:CWCvsIanGuitar.jpg|thumb|The REAL Chris is not only cute, he can play the guitar!]]
:''See Also: [[CWC More Than A Feeling]]''
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#More_Than_A_Feeling_THE_TRUE_VERSION_by_Christian_Weston_Chandler_.28CWC.29|More Than A Feeling THE TRUE VERSION by Christian Weston Chandler (CWC)]]
For whatever reason, Solid dug up an old video of himself failing at Guitar Hero and dumped it online. Liquid shot back with a TRUE and HONEST rendition on a real guitar.

====Spanish Challenge====
[[Image:Cestnepas.jpg|thumb|Ceci n'est pas une Chris]]
:''Main Article: [[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''
More [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC|video rage]] followed, before Solid attempted a cunning plan:

{{quote|También. Mi presente. Responde en español bueño. ¿Si no que bueño? Tu no eres el verdad. Tu eres el impostor.|Solid Chris, ''[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''}}

The plan backfired when [[CWC_Update_29_July_2009#Liquid.27s_response|Liquid responded more fluently in Spanish, French, German, and Japanese]].

====SingStar Challenge====
[[Image:Tgtdfw4.jpg|thumb|Only one clear choice, choosing the TRUE and HONEST Chris]]
{{Main|SingStar_Challenge}}

{{quote|Alright, Christian, Mr. Brown-Striped Impostor, since you have been able to accept and complete my question challenges, it is time to issue a new challenge.|Solid Chris, ''[[SingStar Challenge]]''}}

[[Fail|And then he shaved his goatee off. Dry. With a safety razor.]]

As expected, the contest went to Liquid and Solid was a sore loser about it. Liquid had a tally of 4 votes in favor, 2 against. He then took his leave from the competition, after announcing a number of personal coups:
*that he'd finally found a true sweetheart, [[Kacey]].
*that he'd landed a job as a Production Manager and Game Designer at Microsoft for a Sonichu game for all consoles.
*that Dark Horse Comics would be publishing his [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comics]], making him even more filthy rich, with the opening of the CWCStore.

And finally, that he had decided to stop battling the Solid, and move out of his parents' house to live in Redmond, Seattle, to continue his happy, successful life.

===SHOWDOWN===
{{Main|SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE}}
{{Quote|You’re breaking my balls here.|Solid, ''[[SHOWDOWN]]''}}
On 9 [[August 2009]], Liquid called Solid up and confronted him over the slanderous lies he was telling on YouTube. Solid tried reason, and when that failed, he threatened to arrest Liquid for identity theft and involve Bob in this debacle.

{{quotebox|If you do not come clean right now, I am going to get my father in on this further, and you are going to get fucking arrested, thrown in jail, and you will not get to live the peaceful, happy life that Kacey and I would like [voice cracks] you to live because Kacey really cares for you MAN!<ref>[[SHOWDOWN]]</ref>}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|B6Q1yFXgdoQ}}
</center>

Of course, this sent Solid completely over the deep end. First, he raged:

{{quote|STOP THAT IMPOSTOR BASTARD WHO HAS BEEN POSING WITH MY NAME, MY ADDRESS, MY PHONE NUMBER, EVERYTHING! STOP HIM! HE DESERVES NOTHING!|Solid Chris, ''[[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!]]''}}

Then, he tried reason:

{{quotebox|The Singstar Challenge was NEVER to verify who was the real Christian Weston Chandler, because everyone on the internet knows that I am, he's the imposter. They should quit encouraging him. And I wish that he would stop his stupid damn dirty game. I don't know what the heck is wrong with his head. [his voice gets higher] He ain't right. He don't even let me get a word in edge-wise. He just keeps going on and on AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ONNNNNNNNN! Worse than my father!<ref>[[The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who]]</ref>}}

And as summer disappeared, so too did Liquid Chris: The apparent victim of foul play. Viewer discretion is advised, as the next video is disturbing.

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|RdshGz_Pvks}}
</center>

Chris's sweetheart, [[Kacey]], was distraught over the event and posted a video confirming Chris's disappearance and announcing her withdrawal from their engagement.

===CWCivil War II: Kacey Boogaloo===
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|SIC SEMPER TRUTH AND HONESTY]]
{{Main|Kacey}}
Liquid Chris reappeared on 15 [[October 2009]] with a new video explaining the trials and tribulations of the past few months, and igniting a heated love triangle with Solid for Kacey's affections.

In the [[Greetings to Kacey's folks|video]] addressed to Kacey's parents, Solid called him "'''the previous Chris'''". In a [[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You|desperate video for Kacey]], Solid called him the "'''other Chris'''" repeatedly.

When the dust had settled, Solid had [[Father Call|offended Kacey's father]] and, through his immaturity, pushed Kacey back into the loving arms of the Real Chris.
{{clear}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|Tn7WNTxCDck}}
</center>

===Epilogue===

Liquid Chris is now married to his beloved heartsweet, Kacey. As the one TRUE and HONEST creator of Sonichu, his artwork and comics are extremely popular and he often attracts many beautiful [[boyfriend-free]] females with his medallions and his [[Gitar of Fail|Guitar of Win]].

Liquid makes mad [[Clyde Cash|cash]] by selling said medallions at Otakon and other [[anime]] [[Anime Mid-Atlantic|conventions]] while voicing Solid in ''[[Fan:Sonichu: The Animated Series|Sonichu: The Animated Series]]''. He has also made several hundred thousand dollars from his two critically acclaimed games, ''[[Pokémon: Lightning Version]]'' and ''Sonichu: The Crystal Chronicles'' for the [[Nintendo]] DS and [[Xbox]] 360, respectively.<ref>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V1gEjtmm9M</ref><ref>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V1gEjtmm9M</ref>

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|AQKzqnatMXw}}
</center>

==Irony==
[[Image:LiquidChrisBelieveInMe.jpg|thumb|BELIEVE]]
IBAChandler has mocked the CChanSonichuCWC on several points:

* [[Speech Impediment|His nasal tone]].
* [[Chris and fashion|His brown striped shirt]].
* [[Chris and Money|Actually making money off Sonichu]].
* [[Fat|His appearance]].

It's a bad sign when one is fighting a mirror, [[Fail|and the mirror is winning.]]

In early August 2009<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009]]</ref>, Solid began to believe that Liquid couldn't be the real Chris because only the real Christian Weston Chandler is a retard who is the laughing stock of the Internet. Therefore, the fact that Liquid isn't trolled and doesn't do dumb shit suggests that he isn't the real Chris. Of course, previously mentioned theories seem to disprove this assertion.

In a further fit of irony, Ian ended up impersonating Liquid in a bizarre attempt to woo Liquid's girlfriend, [[Kacey]].
{{clear}}

== In the comic ==
[[Image:TrueAndHonestCWCArt.jpg|The imposter [[Chris]] stole his famous lecture to the [[Jerkops]] from the real Chris.|thumb|left]]
[[Image:Furryiba.jpg|thumb|Go, [[IBAChandler]], and copycatly sieze [sic] to the extreme!]]

On 17 November, 2009 the TRUE and ORIGINAL Chris-chan made his very first appearance in Ian's [[Sonichu 9]]. Ian, being the slanderous troll that he is, had the nerve to imply that Liquid's name was, in fact, Ian Brandon Anderson, and once again tried to convince everyone that he, Solid was the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of Sonichu.

Of course, since the comic is made by the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler, he would obviously cast the impostor in the comic and call him by his real name. Chris shows much more restraint for Ian than was shown to him in [[Sonichu Special 4]].
{{clear}}

==Fan videos==
{{collapsible
|Not TRUE AND ORIGINAL
|
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ayObshLZQwI}}
| Stardate = 2 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|s1SBdwZDN1k}}
| Stardate = 4 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 3
| video = {{#ev:youtube|dYrgl-otclY}}
| Stardate = 6 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm On Hexbawks. :)]]
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XhENYYmGAeA}}
| Stardate = 25 [[January 2010]]
| Maker = BobbyHillify
| Subject =
| Video Type = Trailer for the upcoming [[Xbox]] game
}}
}}

==See also==
*[[Fan:Two_CWCs|Theories on the nature of the two CWCs]]
*[[Solid Chris]]
*[[Robert Simmons V|Solidus Chris]]
*[[Jimmy Hill]]

==References==
<references/>

== External links ==
*[http://www.youtube.com/cchansonichucwc CChanSonichuCWC YouTube account]
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/The_Real_Chris_Chan The Real Chris Chan] on [[ED]]
*[http://www.hsienko.com/asperchu/index.php?title=Christian_Weston_Chandler Christian Weston Chandler] on [[Asperpedia]]

 {{SingStarChallenge}}
{{Template:The_Cwcivil_War_of_2009}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

Liquid Chris

2010-06-22T21:14:14Z

LiquidChrisForever:

{{Improve|massive reorganization|Expand the subtopics under the ''Liquid Saga'' for great justice. Add details and citations}}

{{Protip|If you're going to call Chris "Ian", do so only in the context of this saga.}}

[[Image:CChanSonichuCWC.jpg|thumb|If you look hard, you can see the TRUE, HONEST Sonichu medallion.]]

'''Liquid Chris''' (born 24 [[February 1982]]) is the '''TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler''' (ORIGINAL IDENTITY - DO NOT STEAL) and creator of the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, [[Sonichu]].

==Prologue==
[[June 2009]] was a busy month for [[Christian]] (henceforth '''Solid Chris'''), with new highs and lows. Solid was getting out of the house more and [[Chris's Big Night Out|knocking back some Long Islands with a new group of acquaintances]]. He was given the keys to his shiny new [[CWCipedia]] and had his YouTube account "CChanSonichu" compromised. Yes, he was [[Rollin' and Trollin']] indeed.

{{quote|And I'm nowadays wearing a vest and improving my image.|Solid Chris, [[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]}}

==Liquid Saga==
[[Image:Torture.jpg|Liquid Chris torturing the imposter|thumb]]

====A challenger appears====

:''See also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#Antebellum|Liquid's Antebellum Videos]]''

At the end of the month a new YouTube account, [http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CChanSonichuCWC], appeared with a simple premise: that the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler (henceforth '''Liquid Chris''') was back online after a long absence, during which he lost his account to hackers, so all the weirdness on "CChanSonichu" was the work of hacking trolls, and he announced that he was ready to resume posting HONEST content on his new account. This new CWC posted four more videos, much of which were parodies of earlier videos by Solid Chris.

{{quote|How else would I get fan art, if I was not the original creator of Sonichu?|Liquid Chris, [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Update:_I_am_Still_the_Real_Christian_Weston_Chandler_Despite_LIES_AND_SLANDER._Also.2C_Some_Fan_Art|3 July 2009]]}}

Notably, Liquid Chris sported:
*A paper Sonichu medallion
*A striped shirt (brown)
*Pedo-glasses
*Obesity (by means of a stuffed shirt, later removed)
*Autism

which of course made him almost [[Chris and Reality|''indistinguishable'']] from Solid Chris! Solid himself made no comment, probably because he didn't notice the new videos among the chatter of all the other trolling. The alternative — that Solid just ignored them — is far too reasonable to consider.

====Ian Brandon Anderson====
:''Main Article: [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]
:''See also: [[The July 10th_Messages]]
:''See also: [[Rollin' and Trollin']]

What really cranked this up to eleven was a chain of events that started with Solid Chris getting his "CChanSonichu" channel back: First, Solid posted a series of videos on 10 [[July 2009]] where he "called out" three trolls by their YouTube handles, and dropped their docs (well, dropped "supposed states of residence"). That resulted in the permanent banhammer for "CChanSonichu."

The next piece fell into place when he posted his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video on his new YouTube account, "IBAChandler." When it hit Encyclopedia Dramatica, newfags everywhere momentarily lost control of their bowels, thinking they'd been trolled by a grand master. Trolls, however, did what trolls do best: they started riffing on it. Pretty quickly, YouTube comments popped up referring to Solid as "Ian Brandon Anderson." Such was the price of success for Solid's small drop of near win, in his sea of epic fail: he had delivered unto his enemies a weapon that they'd use for months.

Even then, the damage control from that episode alone would probably have kept him from noticing Liquid's videos. Until that is, Liquid raised the stakes in an attempt to get Solid's attention.

===CWCivil War begins===
[[Image:Honest-and-true.jpg|thumb|right|TRUTH and HONESTY established by the state of [[Virginia]]!!]]
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#The CWCivil|Liquid's CWCivil War Videos]]''

The war began on 21 July, when Liquid uploaded a [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Now_Selling_the_OFFICIAL_and_ORIGINAL_SONICHU_Merchandise_of_CWC.2C_NO_FAKERIES_OR_IMPOSTORY|video]] that reeled Solid in, hook, line and sinker, having sold Sonichu Merchandise with [[Samantha Thaddeus]] at Otakon. A rebuttal was in order:

{{quotebox|DO NOT BUY from the Impostor, "[http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CWCCChanSonichuCWC]". HE IS CRAPPY, and his Nasal Voice is JUST DOWNRIGHT AWFUL.

Also, if I wanted to buy PAPER, I'd go to [[Wal-Mart]] and buy 500 FULL 8.5 X 11 Sheets for about 5 dollars!

HIS CHURCH? HE MUST LIVE IN FRICKIN' OHIO with "[[Julie]]"; NEVER DRIVES GREATER THAN 7 Hours JUST TO EVEN VISIT [[Wesley Memorial]] in [[VIRGINIA]].

F*** HIM TO HELL!<ref>[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Solid also took time out from his busy schedule to post threats on Liquid's YouTube comments:

{{quotebox|'''The Final Showdown'''

Hey, DUMBASS! [[Chris and his ego|YOU WISH YOU WERE ME]]! I would say YOU are Stuck... IN MINUS-SECOND-GEAR!

I am Calling YOU OUT!

[[14 Branchland Ct.]] [[Ruckersville]], VA
BEFORE August 2, 2009.
If you really WANT to be me, then Come Face Me.

oh, BTW, YOUR NASAL VOICE IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "[[Naive|NAIVE]]", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.

But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS.

You are a Nerd and a Whimp!

Have a good day. 
Christopher Christian Weston Chandler<ref>[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Even at this point, Solid Chris still may have let this all go, as he was simultaneously getting blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]], who was holding his [[PSN]] account to ransom. But as that wound down, Liquid caught Solid's eye again, by picking up on the Ian Brandon Anderson meme:

{{quotebox|Hello, again, Loyal Fans,

It is I again, Christian Weston Chandler. NOT Christopher Christian Weston Chandler as EVERYONE KNOWS I Changed my name FROM Christopher to Christian (PS: That Troll, as Some have now Informed Me, his Real Name is IAN BRANDON ANDERSON). Anyway, I am Working Very Hard on Sonichu 9 and Things may be Progressing Heavily with my new TRUE Gal-Pal Kacey and I. Also, Expect more Announcements of this Developing Caliber in the Future.

Stay True.

CWC<ref>[[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Christian_Weston_Chandler.27s_EXCITING_ANNOUNCEMENT_of_SONICHU_and_Addressing_Things.| Christian Weston Chandler's EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT of SONICHU and Addressing Things.]]</ref>}}

==The battleground==

====More Than A Feeling====
[[Image:CWCvsIanGuitar.jpg|thumb|The REAL Chris is not only cute, he can play the guitar!]]
:''See Also: [[CWC More Than A Feeling]]''
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#More_Than_A_Feeling_THE_TRUE_VERSION_by_Christian_Weston_Chandler_.28CWC.29|More Than A Feeling THE TRUE VERSION by Christian Weston Chandler (CWC)]]
For whatever reason, Solid dug up an old video of himself failing at Guitar Hero and dumped it online. Liquid shot back with a TRUE and HONEST rendition on a real guitar.

====Spanish Challenge====
[[Image:Cestnepas.jpg|thumb|Ceci n'est pas une Chris]]
:''Main Article: [[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''
More [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC|video rage]] followed, before Solid attempted a cunning plan:

{{quote|También. Mi presente. Responde en español bueño. ¿Si no que bueño? Tu no eres el verdad. Tu eres el impostor.|Solid Chris, ''[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''}}

The plan backfired when [[CWC_Update_29_July_2009#Liquid.27s_response|Liquid responded more fluently in Spanish, French, German, and Japanese]].

====SingStar Challenge====
[[Image:Tgtdfw4.jpg|thumb|Only one clear choice, choosing the TRUE and HONEST Chris]]
{{Main|SingStar_Challenge}}

{{quote|Alright, Christian, Mr. Brown-Striped Impostor, since you have been able to accept and complete my question challenges, it is time to issue a new challenge.|Solid Chris, ''[[SingStar Challenge]]''}}

[[Fail|And then he shaved his goatee off. Dry. With a safety razor.]]

As expected, the contest went to Liquid and Solid was a sore loser about it. Liquid had a tally of 4 votes in favor, 2 against. He then took his leave from the competition, after announcing a number of personal coups:
*that he'd finally found a true sweetheart, [[Kacey]].
*that he'd landed a job as a Production Manager and Game Designer at Microsoft for a Sonichu game for all consoles.
*that Dark Horse Comics would be publishing his [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comics]], making him even more filthy rich, with the opening of the CWCStore.

And finally, that he had decided to stop battling the Solid, and move out of his parents' house to live in Redmond, Seattle, to continue his happy, successful life.

===SHOWDOWN===
{{Main|SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE}}
{{Quote|You’re breaking my balls here.|Solid, ''[[SHOWDOWN]]''}}
On 9 [[August 2009]], Liquid called Solid up and confronted him over the slanderous lies he was telling on YouTube. Solid tried reason, and when that failed, he threatened to arrest Liquid for identity theft and involve Bob in this debacle.

{{quotebox|If you do not come clean right now, I am going to get my father in on this further, and you are going to get fucking arrested, thrown in jail, and you will not get to live the peaceful, happy life that Kacey and I would like [voice cracks] you to live because Kacey really cares for you MAN!<ref>[[SHOWDOWN]]</ref>}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|B6Q1yFXgdoQ}}
</center>

Of course, this sent Solid completely over the deep end. First, he raged:

{{quote|STOP THAT IMPOSTOR BASTARD WHO HAS BEEN POSING WITH MY NAME, MY ADDRESS, MY PHONE NUMBER, EVERYTHING! STOP HIM! HE DESERVES NOTHING!|Solid Chris, ''[[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!]]''}}

Then, he tried reason:

{{quotebox|The Singstar Challenge was NEVER to verify who was the real Christian Weston Chandler, because everyone on the internet knows that I am, he's the imposter. They should quit encouraging him. And I wish that he would stop his stupid damn dirty game. I don't know what the heck is wrong with his head. [his voice gets higher] He ain't right. He don't even let me get a word in edge-wise. He just keeps going on and on AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ONNNNNNNNN! Worse than my father!<ref>[[The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who]]</ref>}}

And as summer disappeared, so too did Liquid Chris: The apparent victim of foul play. Viewer discretion is advised, as the next video is disturbing.

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|RdshGz_Pvks}}
</center>

Chris's sweetheart, [[Kacey]], was distraught over the event and posted a video confirming Chris's disappearance and announcing her withdrawal from their engagement.

===CWCivil War II: Kacey Boogaloo===
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|SIC SEMPER TRUTH AND HONESTY]]
{{Main|Kacey}}
Liquid Chris reappeared on 15 [[October 2009]] with a new video explaining the trials and tribulations of the past few months, and igniting a heated love triangle with Solid for Kacey's affections.

In the [[Greetings to Kacey's folks|video]] addressed to Kacey's parents, Solid called him "'''the previous Chris'''". In a [[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You|desperate video for Kacey]], Solid called him the "'''other Chris'''" repeatedly.

When the dust had settled, Solid had [[Father Call|offended Kacey's father]] and, through his immaturity, pushed Kacey back into the loving arms of the Real Chris.
{{clear}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|Tn7WNTxCDck}}
</center>

===Epilogue===

Liquid Chris is now married to his beloved heartsweet, Kacey. As the one TRUE and HONEST creator of Sonichu, his artwork and comics are extremely popular and he often attracts many beautiful [[boyfriend-free]] females with his medallions and his [[Gitar of Fail|Guitar of Win]].

Liquid makes mad [[Clyde Cash|cash]] by selling said medallions at Otakon and other [[anime]] [[Anime Mid-Atlantic|conventions]] while voicing Solid in ''[[Fan:Sonichu: The Animated Series|Sonichu: The Animated Series]]''. He has also made several hundred thousand dollars from his two critically acclaimed games, ''[[Pokémon: Lightning Version]]'' and ''Sonichu: The Crystal Chronicles'' for the [[Nintendo]] DS and [[Xbox]] 360, respectively.<ref>http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V1gEjtmm9M</ref><ref>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V1gEjtmm9M</ref>

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|AQKzqnatMXw}}
</center>

==Irony==
[[Image:LiquidChrisBelieveInMe.jpg|thumb|BELIEVE]]
IBAChandler has mocked the CChanSonichuCWC on several points:

* [[Speech Impediment|His nasal tone]].
* [[Chris and fashion|His brown striped shirt]].
* [[Chris and Money|Actually making money off Sonichu]].
* [[Fat|His appearance]].

It's a bad sign when one is fighting a mirror, [[Fail|and the mirror is winning.]]

In early August 2009<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009]]</ref>, Solid began to believe that Liquid couldn't be the real Chris because only the real Christian Weston Chandler is a retard who is the laughing stock of the Internet. Therefore, the fact that Liquid isn't trolled and doesn't do dumb shit suggests that he isn't the real Chris. Of course, previously mentioned theories seem to disprove this assertion.

In a further fit of irony, Ian ended up impersonating Liquid in a bizarre attempt to woo Liquid's girlfriend, [[Kacey]].
{{clear}}

== In the comic ==
[[Image:TrueAndHonestCWCArt.jpg|The imposter [[Chris]] stole his famous lecture to the [[Jerkops]] from the real Chris.|thumb|left]]
[[Image:Furryiba.jpg|thumb|Go, [[IBAChandler]], and copycatly sieze [sic] to the extreme!]]

On 17 November, 2009 the TRUE and ORIGINAL Chris-chan made his very first appearance in Ian's [[Sonichu 9]]. Ian, being the slanderous troll that he is, had the nerve to imply that Liquid's name was, in fact, Ian Brandon Anderson, and once again tried to convince everyone that he, Solid was the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of Sonichu.

Of course, since the comic is made by the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler, he would obviously cast the impostor in the comic and call him by his real name. Chris shows much more restraint for Ian than was shown to him in [[Sonichu Special 4]].
{{clear}}

==Fan videos==
{{collapsible
|Not TRUE AND ORIGINAL
|
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ayObshLZQwI}}
| Stardate = 2 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|s1SBdwZDN1k}}
| Stardate = 4 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 3
| video = {{#ev:youtube|dYrgl-otclY}}
| Stardate = 6 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm On Hexbawks. :)]]
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XhENYYmGAeA}}
| Stardate = 25 [[January 2010]]
| Maker = BobbyHillify
| Subject =
| Video Type = Trailer for the upcoming [[Xbox]] game
}}
}}

==See also==
*[[Fan:Two_CWCs|Theories on the nature of the two CWCs]]
*[[Solid Chris]]
*[[Robert Simmons V|Solidus Chris]]
*[[Jimmy Hill]]

==References==
<references/>

== External links ==
*[http://www.youtube.com/cchansonichucwc CChanSonichuCWC YouTube account]
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/The_Real_Chris_Chan The Real Chris Chan] on [[ED]]
*[http://www.hsienko.com/asperchu/index.php?title=Christian_Weston_Chandler Christian Weston Chandler] on [[Asperpedia]]

 {{SingStarChallenge}}
{{Template:The_Cwcivil_War_of_2009}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

Liquid Chris

2010-06-22T08:53:03Z

LiquidChrisForever:

{{Improve|massive reorganization|Expand the subtopics under the ''Liquid Saga'' for great justice. Add details and citations}}

{{Protip|If you're going to call Chris "Ian", do so only in the context of this saga.}}

[[Image:CChanSonichuCWC.jpg|thumb|If you look hard, you can see the TRUE, HONEST Sonichu medallion.]]

'''Liquid Chris''' (born 24 [[February 1982]]) is the '''TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler''' (ORIGINAL IDENTITY - DO NOT STEAL) and creator of the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, [[Sonichu]].

==Prologue==
[[June 2009]] was a busy month for [[Christian]] (henceforth '''Solid Chris'''), with new highs and lows. Solid was getting out of the house more and [[Chris's Big Night Out|knocking back some Long Islands with a new group of acquaintances]]. He was given the keys to his shiny new [[CWCipedia]] and had his YouTube account "CChanSonichu" compromised. Yes, he was [[Rollin' and Trollin']] indeed.

{{quote|And I'm nowadays wearing a vest and improving my image.|Solid Chris, [[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]}}

==Liquid Saga==
[[Image:Torture.jpg|Liquid Chris torturing the imposter|thumb]]

====A Challenger Appears====

:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#Antebellum|Liquid's Antebellum Videos]]''

At the end of the month a new YouTube account, [http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CChanSonichuCWC], appeared with a simple premise: that the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler (henceforth '''Liquid Chris''') was back online after a long absence, during which he lost his account to hackers, so all the weirdness on "CChanSonichu" was the work of hacking trolls, and he announced that he was ready to resume posting HONEST content on his new account. This new CWC posted four more videos, much of which were parodies of earlier videos by Solid Chris.

{{quote|How else would I get fan art, if I was not the original creator of Sonichu?|Liquid Chris, [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Update:_I_am_Still_the_Real_Christian_Weston_Chandler_Despite_LIES_AND_SLANDER._Also.2C_Some_Fan_Art|3 July 2009]]}}

Notably, Liquid Chris sported:
*A paper Sonichu medallion
*A striped shirt (brown)
*Pedo-glasses
*Obesity (by means of a stuffed shirt, later removed)
*Autism

which of course made him almost [[Chris and Reality|''indistinguishable'']] from Solid Chris! Solid himself made no comment, probably because he didn't notice the new videos among the chatter of all the other trolling. The alternative — that Solid just ignored them — is far too reasonable to consider.

====Ian Brandon Anderson====
:''Main Article: [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]
:''See also: [[The July 10th_Messages]]
:''See also: [[Rollin' and Trollin']]

What really cranked this up to eleven was a chain of events that started with Solid Chris getting his "CChanSonichu" channel back: First, Solid posted a series of videos on 10 [[July 2009]] where he "called out" three trolls by their YouTube handles, and dropped their docs (well, dropped "supposed states of residence"). That resulted in the permanent banhammer for "CChanSonichu."

The next piece fell into place when he posted his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video on his new YouTube account, "IBAChandler." When it hit Encyclopedia Dramatica, newfags everywhere momentarily lost control of their bowels, thinking they'd been trolled by a grand master. Trolls, however, did what trolls do best: they started riffing on it. Pretty quickly, YouTube comments popped up referring to Solid as "Ian Brandon Anderson." Such was the price of success for Solid's small drop of near win, in his sea of epic fail: he had delivered unto his enemies a weapon that they'd use for months.

Even then, the damage control from that episode alone would probably have kept him from noticing Liquid's videos. Until that is, Liquid raised the stakes in an attempt to get Solid's attention.

===CWCivil War Begins===
[[Image:Honest-and-true.jpg|thumb|right|TRUTH and HONESTY established by the state of [[Virginia]]!!]]
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#The CWCivil|Liquid's CWCivil War Videos]]''

The war began on 21 July, when Liquid uploaded a [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Now_Selling_the_OFFICIAL_and_ORIGINAL_SONICHU_Merchandise_of_CWC.2C_NO_FAKERIES_OR_IMPOSTORY|video]] that reeled Solid in, hook, line and sinker, having sold Sonichu Merchandise with [[Samantha Thaddeus]] at Otakon. A rebuttal was in order:

{{quotebox|DO NOT BUY from the Impostor, "[http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CWCCChanSonichuCWC]". HE IS CRAPPY, and his Nasal Voice is JUST DOWNRIGHT AWFUL.

Also, if I wanted to buy PAPER, I'd go to [[Wal-Mart]] and buy 500 FULL 8.5 X 11 Sheets for about 5 dollars!

HIS CHURCH? HE MUST LIVE IN FRICKIN' OHIO with "[[Julie]]"; NEVER DRIVES GREATER THAN 7 Hours JUST TO EVEN VISIT [[Wesley Memorial]] in [[VIRGINIA]].

F*** HIM TO HELL!<ref>[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Solid also took time out from his busy schedule to post threats on Liquid's YouTube comments:

{{quotebox|'''The Final Showdown'''

Hey, DUMBASS! [[Chris and his ego|YOU WISH YOU WERE ME]]! I would say YOU are Stuck... IN MINUS-SECOND-GEAR!

I am Calling YOU OUT!

[[14 Branchland Ct.]] [[Ruckersville]], VA
BEFORE August 2, 2009.
If you really WANT to be me, then Come Face Me.

oh, BTW, YOUR NASAL VOICE IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "[[Naive|NAIVE]]", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.

But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS.

You are a Nerd and a Whimp!

Have a good day. 
Christopher Christian Weston Chandler<ref>[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Even at this point, Solid Chris still may have let this all go, as he was simultaneously getting blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]], who was holding his PSN account to ransom. But as that wound down, Liquid caught Solid's eye again, by picking up on the Ian Brandon Anderson meme:

{{quotebox|Hello, again, Loyal Fans,

It is I again, Christian Weston Chandler. NOT Christopher Christian Weston Chandler as EVERYONE KNOWS I Changed my name FROM Christopher to Christian (PS: That Troll, as Some have now Informed Me, his Real Name is IAN BRANDON ANDERSON). Anyway, I am Working Very Hard on Sonichu 9 and Things may be Progressing Heavily with my new TRUE Gal-Pal Kacey and I. Also, Expect more Announcements of this Developing Caliber in the Future.

Stay True.

CWC<ref>[[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Christian_Weston_Chandler.27s_EXCITING_ANNOUNCEMENT_of_SONICHU_and_Addressing_Things.| Christian Weston Chandler's EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT of SONICHU and Addressing Things.]]</ref>}}

==The Battleground==

====More Than A Feeling====
[[Image:CWCvsIanGuitar.jpg|thumb|The REAL Chris is not only cute, he can play the guitar!]]
:''See Also: [[CWC More Than A Feeling]]''
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#More_Than_A_Feeling_THE_TRUE_VERSION_by_Christian_Weston_Chandler_.28CWC.29|More Than A Feeling THE TRUE VERSION by Christian Weston Chandler (CWC)]]
For whatever reason, Solid dug up an old video of himself failing at Guitar Hero and dumped it online. Liquid shot back with a TRUE and HONEST rendition on a real guitar.

====Spanish Challenge====
[[Image:Cestnepas.jpg|thumb|Ceci n'est pas une Chris]]
:''Main Article: [[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''
More [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC|video rage]] followed, before Solid attempted a cunning plan:

{{quote|También. Mi presente. Responde en español bueño. ¿Si no que bueño? Tu no eres el verdad. Tu eres el impostor.|Solid Chris, ''[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''}}

The plan backfired when [[CWC_Update_29_July_2009#Liquid.27s_response|Liquid responded more fluently in Spanish, French, German, and Japanese]].

====SingStar Challenge====
[[Image:Tgtdfw4.jpg|thumb|Only one clear choice, choosing the TRUE and HONEST Chris]]
{{Main|SingStar_Challenge}}

{{quote|Alright, Christian, Mr. Brown-Striped Impostor, since you have been able to accept and complete my question challenges, it is time to issue a new challenge.|Solid Chris, ''[[SingStar Challenge]]''}}

[[Fail|And then he shaved his goatee off. Dry. With a safety razor.]]

As expected, the contest went to Liquid and Solid was a sore loser about it. Liquid had a tally of 4 votes in favor, 2 against. He then took his leave from the competition, after announcing a number of personal coups:
*that he'd finally found a true sweetheart, [[Kacey]].
*that he'd landed a job as a Production Manager and Game Designer at Microsoft for a Sonichu game for all consoles.
*that Dark Horse Comics would be publishing his [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comics]], making him even more filthy rich, with the opening of the CWCStore.

And finally, that he had decided to stop battling the Solid, and move out of his parents' house to live in Redmond, Seattle, to continue his happy, successful life.

===SHOWDOWN===
{{Main|SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE}}
{{Quote|You’re breaking my balls here.|Solid, ''[[SHOWDOWN]]''}}
On 9 [[August 2009]], Liquid called Solid up and confronted him over the slanderous lies he was telling on YouTube. Solid tried reason, and when that failed, he threatened to arrest Liquid for identity theft and involve Bob in this debacle.

{{quotebox|If you do not come clean right now, I am going to get my father in on this further, and you are going to get fucking arrested, thrown in jail, and you will not get to live the peaceful, happy life that Kacey and I would like [voice cracks] you to live because Kacey really cares for you MAN!<ref>[[SHOWDOWN]]</ref>}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|B6Q1yFXgdoQ}}
</center>

Of course, this sent Solid completely over the deep end. First, he raged:

{{quote|STOP THAT IMPOSTOR BASTARD WHO HAS BEEN POSING WITH MY NAME, MY ADDRESS, MY PHONE NUMBER, EVERYTHING! STOP HIM! HE DESERVES NOTHING!|Solid Chris, ''[[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!]]''}}

Then, he tried reason:

{{quotebox|The Singstar Challenge was NEVER to verify who was the real Christian Weston Chandler, because everyone on the internet knows that I am, he's the imposter. They should quit encouraging him. And I wish that he would stop his stupid damn dirty game. I don't know what the heck is wrong with his head. [his voice gets higher] He ain't right. He don't even let me get a word in edge-wise. He just keeps going on and on AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ONNNNNNNNN! Worse than my father!<ref>[[The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who]]</ref>}}

And as summer disappeared, so too did Liquid Chris: The apparent victim of foul play. Viewer discretion is advised, as the next video is disturbing.

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|RdshGz_Pvks}}
</center>

Chris's sweetheart, [[Kacey]], was distraught over the event and posted a video confirming Chris's disappearance and announcing her withdrawal from their engagement.

===CWCivil War II: Kacey Boogaloo===
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|SIC SEMPER TRUTH AND HONESTY]]
{{Main|Kacey}}
Liquid Chris reappeared on 15 [[October 2009]] with a new video explaining the trials and tribulations of the past few months, and igniting a heated love triangle with Solid for Kacey's affections.

In the [[Greetings to Kacey's folks|video]] addressed to Kacey's parents, Solid called him "'''the previous Chris'''". In a [[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You|desperate video for Kacey]], Solid called him the "'''other Chris'''" repeatedly.

When the dust had settled, Solid had [[Father Call|offended Kacey's father]] and, through his immaturity, pushed Kacey back into the loving arms of the Real Chris.
{{clear}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|Tn7WNTxCDck}}
</center>

===Epilogue===

Liquid Chris is now married to his beloved heartsweet, Kacey. As the one TRUE and HONEST creator of Sonichu, his artwork and comics are extremely popular and he often attracts many beautiful [[boyfriend-free]] females with his medallions and his [[Gitar of Fail|Guitar of Win]]. He makes mad [[Clyde Cash|cash]] by selling said medallions at Otakon and other [[anime]] [[Anime Mid-Atlantic|conventions]] while voicing Solid in [[Fan:Sonichu: The Animated Series|Sonichu: The Animated Series]]. He has also made several hundred thousand dollars from his two critically acclaimed games, [[Pokémon: Lightning Version]] and Sonichu: The Crystal Chronicles for the Nintendo DS and Xbox 360, respectively. <ref>[http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V1gEjtmm9M http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V1gEjtmm9M (info is in the video's description)]</ref>

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|AQKzqnatMXw}}
</center>

==Irony==
[[Image:LiquidChrisBelieveInMe.jpg|thumb|BELIEVE]]
IBAChandler has mocked the CChanSonichuCWC on several points:

* [[Speech Impediment|His nasal tone]].
* [[Chris and fashion|His brown striped shirt]].
* [[Chris and Money|Actually making money off Sonichu]].
* [[Fat|His appearance]].

It's a bad sign when one is fighting a mirror, [[Fail|and the mirror is winning.]]

In early August 2009<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009]]</ref>, Solid began to believe that Liquid couldn't be the real Chris because only the real Christian Weston Chandler is a retard who is the laughing stock of the Internet. Therefore, the fact that Liquid isn't trolled and doesn't do dumb shit suggests that he isn't the real Chris. Of course, previously mentioned theories seem to disprove this assertion.

In a further fit of irony, Ian ended up impersonating Liquid in a bizarre attempt to woo Liquid's girlfriend, [[Kacey]].
{{clear}}

== In the Comics ==
[[Image:TrueAndHonestCWCArt.jpg|The imposter [[Chris]] stole his famous lecture to the [[Jerkops]] from the real Chris.|thumb|left]]
[[Image:Furryiba.jpg|thumb|Go, [[IBAChandler]], and copycatly sieze [sic] to the extreme!]]

On 17 November, 2009 the TRUE and ORIGINAL Chris-chan made his very first appearance in Ian's [[Sonichu 9]]. Ian, being the slanderous troll that he is, had the nerve to imply that Liquid's name was, in fact, Ian Brandon Anderson, and once again tried to convince everyone that he, Solid was the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of Sonichu.

Of course, since the comic is made by the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler, he would obviously cast the impostor in the comic and call him by his real name. Chris shows much more restraint for Ian than was shown to him in [[Sonichu Special 4]].
{{clear}}

==Fan videos==
{{collapsible
|Not TRUE AND ORIGINAL
|
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ayObshLZQwI}}
| Stardate = 2 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|s1SBdwZDN1k}}
| Stardate = 4 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Final Fight - part 3
| video = {{#ev:youtube|dYrgl-otclY}}
| Stardate = 6 XI 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm On Hexbawks. :)]]
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XhENYYmGAeA}}
| Stardate = 25 [[January 2010]]
| Maker = BobbyHillify
| Subject =
| Video Type = Trailer for the upcoming [[Xbox]] game
}}
}}

==See also==
*[[Fan:Two_CWCs|Theories on the nature of the two CWCs]]
*[[Solid Chris]]
*[[Robert Simmons V|Solidus Chris]]
*[[Jimmy Hill]]

==References==
<references/>

== External links ==
*[http://www.youtube.com/cchansonichucwc CChanSonichuCWC YouTube account]
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/The_Real_Chris_Chan The Real Chris Chan] on [[ED]]
*[http://www.hsienko.com/asperchu/index.php?title=Christian_Weston_Chandler Christian Weston Chandler] on [[Asperpedia]]

 {{SingStarChallenge}}
{{Template:The_Cwcivil_War_of_2009}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009

2010-06-22T03:52:41Z

LiquidChrisForever:

The following videos were uploaded by [[Liquid Chris]] during [[June 2009|June]] and [[July 2009]].

==Antebellum Messages==

The following videos were made before [[Christian|Solid Chris]] discovered and denounced [[Liquid Chris]], and are mostly topical parodies of Solid's videos from the same timeframe.

===CWC: I Have Returned To Youtube!!===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|VStmR463_uY}}</center>

'''June 21, 2009:''' I am Christian Weston Chandler, creator of Sonichu and Rosechu. This is my First Video in a Long Time and it is because I was Uploading more videos to Youtube recently, but due to their HONEST CONTENT they were DELETED before any of my fans could SEE THEM!

===New Christian Weston Chandler Video featuring the Hit Song "So Need a Cute Girl" by CWC===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|0WtTzvbz9e0}}</center>

'''June 30, 2009:'''Hello to all the Sonichu Loyal Fans out there, waitng on Poor Ol' Me to make a video for y'all. Here's da update and NO I will NOT COMMENT ANYMORE on the Clyde Controversy. Stay Safe, and Straight.

PS: No updates on my Future Sweetheart Hayden Panettiere, yet, so do'nt ask. Peace

===Update: I am Still the Real Christian Weston Chandler Despite LIES AND SLANDER. Also, Some Fan Art===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|OqE2k_KCGbs}}</center>

'''July 03, 2009:''' Hey y'all, do not pay any attention to those DENOUNCED fakeries on My Former Account. They are patently false, and I still am looking for a Boyfriend-free Gal Pal. Also, I have Some Fan Art to show y'all that I have gotten over the last few days from the Loyal Base.

===Christian Chandler (CWC) Presents: A Music Remix from my New Gal-Pal.===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|1CHjLvHSe3Q}}</center>

'''July 05, 2009:''' Hello, all, I have been Correponding with a New Friend and Gal-pal who has Asked me to put this on my Channel. Seeing as I have yet to Get One Ounce of Vagina, I must follow her Every Wish. Peace.

CWC

===ECV 00120 Christian Weston Chandler Threatens A TROLL, TO BACK OFF!!===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|VKgEs7b5xB4}}</center>

'''July 11, 2009:''' This user has Harassed me for such that long time, please Hack His Account for REVENGE. CWC

==The CWCivil War==

===Now Selling the OFFICIAL and ORIGINAL SONICHU Merchandise of CWC, NO FAKERIES OR IMPOSTORY===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|XYsrdv_P8y4}}</center>

'''July 21, 2009:''' Hello, Loyal Sonichu Fanbase, I went to Otackon Last Weekend and Made A Lot of MONEY off of my Official Stuff. I will set a Website up soon with Buying Information.

===Now Introducing Christian Weston Chandler's CWCville Outlet Shopping and Deluxe Department Bureau===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|BpIe9i-B0eo}}</center>

'''July 23, 2009:''' Hey y'all, don't Worry, the Site will be Up Soon. I am Auctioning a Special Mediallion here: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=22... as it has been the TRUE and ORIGINAL medallion before, and it is For Sale For a Good Cause: Children with Cancer.

Stay True and do not LISTEN to IMPOSTORS. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

CWC

===A Preview of a Surprise===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|_Ps7qcH7sPA}}</center>

'''July 24, 2009:''' Hi y'all, TRY THIS ON FOR SIZE! Yes, it Is What You Think It Is.
Oh, and Look at this Patriotic Poster Dis'ing the TROLL.
http://img35.imageshack.us/img35/2720/tgtdfw4.jpg

Stay True.

CWC

===Christian Weston Chandler's EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT of SONICHU and Addressing Things.===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|OX1wo9FQ_SA}}</center>

'''July 26, 2009:''' Hello, again, Loyal Fans,

It is I again, Christian Weston Chandler. NOT Christopher Christian Weston Chandler as EVERYONE KNOWS I Changed my name FROM Christopher to Christian (PS: That Troll, as Some have now Informed Me, his Real Name is IAN BRANDON ANDERSON). Anyway, I am Working Very Hard on Sonichu 9 and Things may be Progressing Heavily with my new TRUE Gal-Pal Kacey and I. Also, Expect more Announcements of this Developing Caliber in the Future.

Stay True.

CWC

===NOT Forced to Say this at All...===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|hPmKIceGYWY}}</center>

'''July 27, 2009:''' Yes, I am NOT Leaveing Clues in the Video as to what is REALLY Going on. Yes, that is Something I am CERTAINLY NOT Doing.

CWC

===That Slanderous Clyde Cash is Harassing me Again===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|mToOKm7IxWo}}</center>

'''July 27, 2009:''' You Want Proof? Listen to This. http://www.mediafire.com/?llrlpmmemfz

It's that CLYDE CASH Again, the Very Same who has Been Trolling Me my entire Adult Life!!

===More Than A Feeling THE TRUE VERSION by Christian Weston Chandler (CWC)===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|P6t63XMQfg0}}</center>

'''July 29, 2009:''' The IMPOSTOR Ian Brandon Anderson (Possibly Clyde Cash) sent me THIS:

"You are NOT GOING TO REPLY, Much less COME AND FACE ME!

If You Can Not even TAKE THE TIME TO ACCEPT MY CHALLENGE, then I'm just going to have to REPORT YOUR SORRY ASS TO MY DETECTIVE; HE WILL BE ON YOUR SORRY ONE FASTER than a Sonic-Boom. Nice Doll.

Christian Weston Chandler
14 Branchland Ct.
Ruckersville, Virginia 22968
434-990-0198

CALL MY HOUSE, LEAVE YOUR NUMBER, AND TALK TO ME LIKE A MAN!
If you remain a Cowardly Weakling, You will just have to RETURN To the Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens. What "class" there was it you enrolled in again? Major In DUUUHHHHHH!!!?"

HE DIDN'T EVEN SIGN IT AT THE END. What a TROLL.

Also, Shout-Out to my Sweet Peach, Kacey, I will Post her Account Later.

CWC

===Christian Weston Chandler (Ricardo) Hablar con el Impostor, And MANY OTHER NOTIFICATIONS!===

<center>{{#ev:youtube|yYAAc9zAVQw}}</center>

'''July 31, 2009:''' Bonjour, Loyal Amigos. (Random-Access Humor Joke!)

I am Successful as Ever and no TROLLS and their Cohorts will OVERTAKE Me. He is TROLLIN' STUPID. Also, MidnightKissable (Kacey, my Heartsweet) I LOVE YOU!

Clyde Cash is a Good Man.

Stay True, and Peace! And Love.

CWC

{{succession|label=[[Liquid Chris|CWCivil War!]]|prevlink=NONE|nextlink=[[SingStar Challenge]]|}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

June 2010

2010-06-19T22:53:20Z

LiquidChrisForever:

[[Image:Grandtheft_CWC.jpg|thumb|On '''4 June''', Christian's vendetta against those who wronged him continued.]]
[[Image:100 0695.JPG|thumb|Chris on '''18 June''', proving to us that he hasn't learned a damn thing.]]
'''June 2010''' started out with a whimper. After Chris's [[100 2189|fourth threat]] to leave the [[Internet]], many fully expected that Chris would not keep to his word. The first signs of him not staying true to his word was the fact that he continued to log in to his [[YouTube]] account. However, some suspect that the ''real'' reason he was quiet for the start of the month was ''[[ModNation Racers]]''.

The silence was then broken on 4 June. Chris traveled to [[The GAMe PLACe]] with the desire to take a picture of [[Michael Snyder]] so that he could print it out and put it on a dartboard. Long story short, Chris attempts vehicular homicide while [[Alcohol|drunk]] and he's let off scot-free by the [[police]]. Two days later, he makes a video addressing these events, and announces that he's leaving the Internet. [[Chris and hypocrisy|Again]]. [[Youtube Finale|For]] [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|the]] [[100 2188|fifth]] [[100 2189|time]].

Chris then fell silent for twelve days. As usual, a few faggots jumped to the conclusion that the CWC saga was over. The faithful were then rewarded on 18 June, when a field agent spotted Chris at the [[Fridays After Five]] event in [[Charlottesville]]. He then took several pictures of Chris and uploaded them to the internet for the world to see. In a few of these pictures, he is wearing a [[sports bra]] which reads "[[Love Quest|WANT WOMAN]]", thus showing that ever since he was compelled to leave the internet by [[Rocky|an outside force]], he has gone back to the era of the [[attraction sign]]. This time around, it's not so much retarded as it is really creepy.

==Events of June 2010==
* 4 June - The Charlottesville Incident. Chris makes a [[Reeb|drunken]] trip to [[The GAMe PLACe]], one of the places he's banned from, takes a photograph of the [[manajerk]] [[Michael Snyder]] (and/or his daughter) and is confronted by the Snyders and the police.
* 6 June - Michael finally confirms our suspicions. [http://www.youtube.com/comment_servlet?all_comments=1&v=Uvgy-m2KbGw Mike on YouTube] talks about how Chris tried to [[pedofork|take pictures of his daughter]] and [http://www.youtube.com/comment_search?username=thercholic how he tried to run him over]. Surprisingly, [[CWC's Diary#June 2005|this isn't the first time he's tried to kill people with his car]].
* 6 June - Chris uploads a [[June062010.MOV|video]] addressing Michael Synder's accusation against him, along with dispelling the rumor that he sexually molests his [[cats]].
* 10 June - [[Fan:TV Tropes|TV Tropes]] article on ''[[Sonichu]]'' gets deleted and locked due to "negativity".
* 17 June - TV Tropes article gets partly restored but is still locked to prevent an edit war.
* 18 June - Chris' half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] becomes an object of hate to the general public after he gives the first negative review to the otherwise critically-acclaimed ''Toy Story 3''.
* 18 June - Chris attends the [[Fridays After Five‎]] event, dressed as a [[gay]] trucker and acting like a [[pedofork]].

{{Timeline}}

Cole Smithey

2010-06-19T21:38:09Z

LiquidChrisForever:

{{quote|Let me know when that fuck [[Bob]] finally drops.|Cole, [[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|24 July 2007 email #3]]}}

{{quote|I do not regret giving birth to Cole.|Barbara, [[:Image:Cole_07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 email #1]]}}

[[Image:Colesmithey.jpg|right|thumb|Cole: The [[Liquid|antithesis]] of Chris.]]

'''Joseph Cole Smithey''' (born 24 July 1963)<ref>''[[:Image:046-ColeCDIn.jpg|A CD For Cole Smithey!]]''</ref> is [[Chris]]'s half-brother, [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara's]] first son, and one of the successful escapees from the [[14 Branchland Court|Casa De Chandler]]. Despite sharing chromosomes with Chris and being raised by the same horrible mother, Cole seems to be a pretty normal guy. Cole's emails to Chris revealed a lot about the Chandler family.

==Relationship with Barbara and Bob==

[[Image:0467-CWC18th20.jpg|thumb|Cole smiles alongside [[Barbara]] on Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]]

Cole isn't on good terms with [[Bob]] or [[Barbara]]. Cole was physically and mentally abused by Barbara and his stepfather Jerry with punishments such as ass beatings, cold showers, and "bizarre scenarios." Bob isn't exactly a role model either, as he worked his "bitter influence" on Barbara to separate her from Cole. Cole has "never met a meaner or more reprehensible Republican cur than Bob Chandler."<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref>

Barbara has lied about the identity of Cole's biological father and related facts repeatedly, even on the night before Cole's wedding and even after Cole hired a private detective to find evidence that contradicts her claims. It turns out Barbara was never married to Jack Dale Smithey, Cole's alleged father, but rather Ran ''Cole''man Yeatts.

Barbara visited Cole only once in 27 years, whereas Cole had made special effort to visit her several times. Cole's wife's family treats him more like family than his own.

==Relationship with Chris==

[[Image:0468-CWC&JCS.jpg|thumb|The half-brothers hold their hands the same way on Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]]

Cole was not around when Chris was growing up. Being 19 years older, he was in California making a life for himself.<ref name="email07-03-06p3" /> Cole said that Barbara and Bob neglected Chris for years with the [[abusive babysitter]],<ref name="email07-03-06p3" /> which suggests that Chris's muteness in early life was their fault.

Cole visited for Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday party]] in [[2000]]. Later in the same year, for Cole's 37th birthday, Chris made him ''A CD For Cole Smithey!'' Naturally, the present had little to do with Cole and [[Chris and his Ego|everything to do with Chris]], even featuring a picture of him on the cover. Chris further taints the CD by attempting to talk like a DJ.

In [[July 2007]], Chris sent an email asking for Cole's vote in the [[Chop Chop Onion's Rap Showdown|PaRappa contest]]. In return, Cole asked Chris to find out the truth about his father from Barbara. Chris did ask his mother about it, but she lied once again. Chris was more interested in the PaRappa contest than his brother's plight, showing just how self-absorbed he truly is. This resulted in Cole becoming even more bitter towards both Chris and Barbara. Suffice to say, Cole did not vote for Chris. When Chris's [[nudes]] were sent from his email in [[September 2008]], Cole replied with "DO NOT CONTACT ME BY EMAIL AGAIN."

'''tl;dr:''' Barbara is a whore and Chris doesn't give a shit about anybody but himself.

==Cole in the comics==

Strangely, though, Chris still found a way to put his brother into his mess. According to the [[CWCipedia]] profile for [[Rosechu]], there is a "Professor Cole" listed, being the one who gave [[Kel]] the Pichu who'd become [[Rosechu]]. This means that even his ''brother'' is stuck in [[CWCville]].

==Personal success==

Cole resided in California for 16 years and has been in New York since around [[1996]].<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 1]]</ref> Cole lives with his wife Katherine, is the self-confessed "smartest film critic in the world,"<ref>[http://www.colesmithey.com ColeSmithey.com]</ref> and plays wicked guitar in a jazz band.<ref name="email07-03-06p3">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 3]]</ref>

==Cole causes controversy==

On June 18th, 2010, Cole became the first person out of 131 reviewers to give ''Toy Story 3'' a "rotten" review on the website [http://www.rottentomatoes.com Rotten Tomatoes].<ref>[http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/toy_story_3/comments.php?reviewid=1889775 http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/toy_story_3/comments.php?reviewid=1889775]</ref> Immediately after posting this controversial review, Cole received hundreds of comments which relentlessly flamed his intelligence. This may prove that [[internet]] infamy runs in the family.

==Gallery==

<center><gallery>
Image:045-ColeCD.jpg|''A CD For Cole Smithey!''
Image:046-ColeCDIn.jpg|As if [[Barbara]] had any involvement with the CD
Image:Cole 07-03-06-1.PNG|6 [[March 2007]] email
Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG
Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG
Image:Cole 07-03-06-4.PNG
Image:Cole 07-07-21.PNG|21 [[July 2007]] email
Image:Cole 07-07-23.PNG|23 [[July 2007]] email
Image:Cole 07-07-24-1.PNG|24 [[July 2007]] emails
Image:Cole 07-07-24-2.PNG
Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG
</gallery></center>

==Sauces==
<references />

==External links==
* [http://www.colesmithey.com ColeSmithey.com]
* [http://www.rottentomatoes.com/author/author-3041/ Cole at Rotten Tomatoes]
* [http://www.rottentomatoes.com/news/1716056/2/meet_a_critic_cole_smithey_the_new_york_writer_with_a_rock_n_roll_past Rotten Tomatoes interviews Cole]

{{Not_Jerks}}
{{People}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Smithey, Cole}}

[[Category:Family Members]]
[[Category:People]]

Cole Smithey

2010-06-18T22:47:30Z

LiquidChrisForever:

{{quote|Let me know when that fuck [[Bob]] finally drops.|Cole, [[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|24 July 2007 email #3]]}}

{{quote|I do not regret giving birth to Cole.|Barbara, [[:Image:Cole_07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 email #1]]}}

[[Image:Colesmithey.jpg|right|thumb|Cole: The [[Liquid|antithesis]] of Chris.]]

'''Joseph Cole Smithey''' (born 24 July 1963)<ref>''[[:Image:046-ColeCDIn.jpg|A CD For Cole Smithey!]]''</ref> is [[Chris]]'s half-brother, [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara's]] first son, and one of the successful escapees from the [[14 Branchland Court|Casa De Chandler]]. Despite sharing chromosomes with Chris and being raised by the same horrible mother, Cole seems to be a pretty normal guy. Cole's emails to Chris revealed a lot about the Chandler family.

==Relationship with Barbara and Bob==

[[Image:0467-CWC18th20.jpg|thumb|Cole smiles alongside [[Barbara]] on Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]]

Cole isn't on good terms with [[Bob]] or [[Barbara]]. Cole was physically and mentally abused by Barbara and his stepfather Jerry with punishments such as ass beatings, cold showers, and "bizarre scenarios." Bob isn't exactly a role model either, as he worked his "bitter influence" on Barbara to separate her from Cole. Cole has "never met a meaner or more reprehensible Republican cur than Bob Chandler."<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref>

Barbara has lied about the identity of Cole's biological father and related facts repeatedly, even on the night before Cole's wedding and even after Cole hired a private detective to find evidence that contradicts her claims. It turns out Barbara was never married to Jack Dale Smithey, Cole's alleged father, but rather Ran ''Cole''man Yeatts.

Barbara visited Cole only once in 27 years, whereas Cole had made special effort to visit her several times. Cole's wife's family treats him more like family than his own.

==Relationship with Chris==

[[Image:0468-CWC&JCS.jpg|thumb|The half-brothers hold their hands the same way on Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]]

Cole was not around when Chris was growing up. Being 19 years older, he was in California making a life for himself.<ref name="email07-03-06p3" /> Cole said that Barbara and Bob neglected Chris for years with the [[abusive babysitter]],<ref name="email07-03-06p3" /> which suggests that Chris's muteness in early life was their fault.

Cole visited for Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday party]] in [[2000]]. Later in the same year, for Cole's 37th birthday, Chris made him ''A CD For Cole Smithey!'' Naturally, the present had little to do with Cole and [[Chris and his Ego|everything to do with Chris]], even featuring a picture of him on the cover. Chris further taints the CD by attempting to talk like a DJ.

In [[July 2007]], Chris sent an email asking for Cole's vote in the [[Chop Chop Onion's Rap Showdown|PaRappa contest]]. In return, Cole asked Chris to find out the truth about his father from Barbara. Chris did ask his mother about it, but she lied once again. Chris was more interested in the PaRappa contest than his brother's plight, showing just how self-absorbed he truly is. This resulted in Cole becoming even more bitter towards both Chris and Barbara. Suffice to say, Cole did not vote for Chris. When Chris's [[nudes]] were sent from his email in [[September 2008]], Cole replied with "DO NOT CONTACT ME BY EMAIL AGAIN."

'''tl;dr:''' Barbara is a whore and Chris doesn't give a shit about anybody but himself.

==Cole in the comics==

Strangely, though, Chris still found a way to put his brother into his mess. According to the [[CWCipedia]] profile for [[Rosechu]], there is a "Professor Cole" listed, being the one who gave [[Kel]] the Pichu who'd become [[Rosechu]]. This means that even his ''brother'' is stuck in [[CWCville]].

==Personal success==

Cole resided in California for 16 years and has been in New York since around [[1996]].<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 1]]</ref> Cole lives with his wife Katherine, is the self-confessed "smartest film critic in the world,"<ref>[http://www.colesmithey.com ColeSmithey.com]</ref> and plays wicked guitar in a jazz band.<ref name="email07-03-06p3">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 3]]</ref>

==Cole Causes Controversy==

On June 18th, 2010, Cole became the first person out of 131 reviewers to give Toy Story 3 a "rotten" review on the website [http://www.rottentomatoes.com Rotten Tomatoes]. <ref>[http://www.colesmithey.com/capsules/2010/06/toy-story-3.html http://www.colesmithey.com/capsules/2010/06/toy-story-3.html]</ref> Immediately after posting this controversial review, Cole received over one hundred comments which relentlessly flamed his intelligence. This may prove that internet infamy runs in the family.

==Gallery==

<center><gallery>
Image:045-ColeCD.jpg|''A CD For Cole Smithey!''
Image:046-ColeCDIn.jpg|As if [[Barbara]] had any involvement with the CD
Image:Cole 07-03-06-1.PNG|6 [[March 2007]] email
Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG
Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG
Image:Cole 07-03-06-4.PNG
Image:Cole 07-07-21.PNG|21 [[July 2007]] email
Image:Cole 07-07-23.PNG|23 [[July 2007]] email
Image:Cole 07-07-24-1.PNG|24 [[July 2007]] emails
Image:Cole 07-07-24-2.PNG
Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG
</gallery></center>

==Sauces==
<references />

==External links==
* [http://www.colesmithey.com ColeSmithey.com]
* [http://www.rottentomatoes.com/author/author-3041/ Cole at Rotten Tomatoes]
* [http://www.rottentomatoes.com/news/1716056/2/meet_a_critic_cole_smithey_the_new_york_writer_with_a_rock_n_roll_past Rotten Tomatoes interviews Cole]

{{Not_Jerks}}
{{People}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Smithey, Cole}}

[[Category:Family Members]]
[[Category:People]]