CWCki - User contributions [en]

Talk:Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-17T16:03:02Z

Loserbrain:

{{Not_A_Forum}}

Oh my heavenly God... --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 13:47, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Transcribing, should be done soonish? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 13:54, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:Arrr, ya beat me, ya scurvy scallawag! Anyways; Un-fucking-beleivable. It's the 'Falling Towers' video all over again.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 13:56, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
::Done transcribing...jesusfuck. There's parts of it I couldn't really make out, sorry guys. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 14:26, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:::We got yer back. Fucking hell.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 14:50, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Chris is BACK!--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 13:57, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Evidently, Chris has no idea how racist this is and how doubly creepy it is. Mr. Popo is so creepy that DBZ Abridged made it a running joke. [[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 13:58, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Is that what the japanese think Arabs look like?--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 14:03, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
: http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Popo That's all it says (and what it says is pretty damning), I suppose you'd have to ask Akira.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 14:13, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:: IIRC Mr. Popo was based on depictions of a continental Indian character who looks like a racist stereotype, but actually preceded them. It's all a very touchy and difficult issue, but seeing as how Chris ''knows the full implication of blackface in America and is ostensibly a U.S. citizen'' he ain't got shit for excuses. [[User:EnsignDisposable|EnsignDisposable]] 16:22, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

I've got a vague transcription, I'll stick it on the page but there are quite a few [unintelligable]s and I am a n00b so forgive me. [[User:Enibure|Enibure]] 14:06, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

I believe he's actually sort of cosplaying [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._Popo#Mr._Popo Mr. Popo], a minor character from DragonBall Z. --[[User:ErsatzHouse|ErsatzHouse]] 14:15, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

for the ending part it sounded to me like "ain't no saiyans on the fiddle", am i alone in thinking this --[[User:Phlegethon|Phlegethon]] 14:21, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:Remember, think "uncaringly racist"; he's singinging a minstrel song, which I would imainge are still popular in a redneck racist bible-humping cesspool of society--- In ANY of the 'outdoors' videos, like the McCintyre park video, the shopping spree he won as a kid, the council meeting, Fridays after 5- was there even ONE black person in any of them? Anyways, minstrel songs, the South in 1800's (which isn't that far removed from how it is now, it seems); he was saying "Saints".--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 14:50, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Still need to categorize this biznitch.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:04, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

I think Chris has gotten fatter because his muscle bra seems to be struggling to keep his man tits from bouncing.--[[User:Bealtespip122|Bealtespip122]] 15:59, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

"Heavenly matched" line should link to http://cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P09.jpg but I don't know what the link format is, ha-durrrrrrrrrr. XP --[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 16:10, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:Nevermind, found the format.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 16:37, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

==Song?==
Can we get the sauce on the song playing in the background?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 14:08, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:"Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" by Crash Test Dummies. [[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 14:14, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

== Should there be a link for chris and his ego? ==

In his lyrics whiles he's whining about his life story he says "But bullies who '''were jealous''' of his material things"
*Seems kind of minute compared to other examples, but no shit is too minor--[[User:AdderCress|AdderCress]] 14:47, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
::Hell, do we even need to invoke that phrase? The only time I would need to use "minor" and "Chris" in the same sentence is to describe his duck, his sexual interests, and his brain.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 14:56, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
So, it's true that he believes trolls are only after him for his material wealth (of shit). [[User:Nimnoms|Nimnoms]] 15:06, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

==Blackface==
I really thought it was just an innocent naive version of Popo and he doesn't unterstand the racial implications but then he blows it all away with his own little minstrel show at the end. I know this is not a forum and all, but I guess this can be interesting for the article - how does a roomdweller with the mind of a 12 year old can make such a spot on impression?
TL;DR
Where is the 'fiddle routine' ripped off from? --[[User:Maximilian Graves|Maximilian Graves]] 15:16, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:This shouldn't be a NAF issue because it deals directly with the content of the article. Chris isn't in blackface. He's dressed up as Mr. Popo, who isn't in blackface—he's a member of a species who just looks like that. It's obviously arguable that it ''looks'' like he was in blackface and that the character's design could've been inspired by it, but the most likely explanation is that the DANG DIRTY TROLLS knew this much better than Chris.
{{quote|You ain't seen no niggers on the fiddle. No niggers on the fiddle like this. You ain't seen no niggers on the fiddle no niggers on the fiddle like this.|[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0215545/quotes Womack, ''Bamboozled'']}}
:—[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 15:52, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

So I guess ''Bamboozled'' is one the many things Chris misinterpreted. Despite its glaringly unsubtle satire, he ''still'' didn't get it. --[[User:Manwithoutabody|Manwithoutabody]] 16:47, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

== Feature this video ==

Holy fuck, jackie is the best sweetheart. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 00:23, 17 September 2010 (PDT)

Julie is still the greatest, I agree on featuring the video though...should we make an article about Chris and Cosplay? This isn't the first time he's dressed up as something...nor do I think will it be the last.--[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 08:41, 17 September 2010 (PDT)
*I don't think we have enough material for that, mate.--[[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 09:03, 17 September 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-17T16:02:50Z

Loserbrain:

Talk:Haters Gonna Hate.MOV

2010-09-06T21:43:29Z

Loserbrain: /* Appearance and weight */

Trying to transcribe...having trouble--[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 09:22, 6 September 2010 (PDT)
- Disregard that I suck cocks, I can't even refresh the page without lagging out.--[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 09:46, 6 September 2010 (PDT)--[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 09:46, 6 September 2010 (PDT)
* I have TRANSCRIBED DIS BITCH. Mostly. Rest easy. --[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 09:54, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

Pfft, Chris is using his DEEP SCARY VOICE OOOOOOO -[[User:CypherFDP|CypherFDP]] 09:47, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

==PS3==
I broke the page, sorry, but guess what I found. [[User:Ash link|Ash link]] 10:01, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

==Case?==
Chris said he was keeping the PStripple case as a memento, is that a console or the case on the shelf? Keep in mind, I dont' know anything about Playstation 3 cases. --[[User:Fearfulsymmetry|Fearfulsymmetry]] 10:19, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

For a second I thought it might be a ps3 slim with the old faceplate leaned against it, but after comparing videos - it looks exactly the same as the old one pretty much...did he get a used old fat ps3? perhaps on ebay? any recent activity on ebay? is it possible the one he crushed really was a decoy? [[User:Superwoman|Superwoman]] 10:40, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

It looks like the one he made out of Pixelblocks. Anyways, if he had bought a new PS3, why would he have it on a shelf? [[User:Xavier|Xavier]] 11:31, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

==Wi-Fi Antenna Gymnast Ribbon?==
is that the removed wifi antenna which he spins around at the camera near the end?? [[User:Superwoman|Superwoman]] 10:38, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

== Wrong title ==

Should be Haters Gonna Hate.MOV (or just Haters Gonna Hate). --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 11:38, 6 September 2010 (PDT)
: [[Haters Gonna Hate.MOV]], fix this shit. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 11:48, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

== Appearance and weight ==

He looks chubbier than usual to me. Thoughts? --[[User:ErsatzHouse|ErsatzHouse]] 12:03, 6 September 2010 (PDT)
:2 things: 1) not a forum; 2) not really --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 12:41, 6 September 2010 (PDT)
*Yes, he gained some weight during the hiatus. We usually discuss this stuff on /cwc/ after every video, so go there for this kind of discussion. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 14:43, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

Haters Gonna Hate.MOV

2010-09-06T17:16:35Z

Loserbrain:

'''Haters Gonna Hate''' is a video released on 6 [[September 2010]]. In it, a smug Chris dismisses the various rumors about his life, proclaims that the trolls will never control his life again, and says "Haters Gonna Hate". This video marks the return of the [[Medallions of Fail|Sonichu medallion]] after being missing for half the year.
Also, following the PS3 destruction videos, it's possible to see a PS3 on the top shelf, next to the television. It may be a new one, but it's also possible that Chris kept the old one as a memento.

== Video ==

{{Infobox/video
| name = ItIsFinished.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|N3KX-1o2WRU}}
| stardate = 6 September 2010
| subject = {{Rumors|text}}
| shirt = {{OrangeShirt|text}}
| previous = [[ItIsFinished.MOV]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===
[[image:PS3Alive.png|thumb|right|''I feel fantastic, and I'm still alive.'']]

''*[[sigh]]*'' September...(counting under his breath) 4..5...sixth! two thousand ten. I am ''not'' dead. ''[dramatic glasses removal]'' I am very much alive, [[Chris and health|healthy and well]]. And I aims to keep it that way. So don't believe any damn rumors from the dang trolls, 'cause they always gotta be falsified. And I'll tell ya something else - [[Patti Chandler|Patti]] [[/cwc/|ain't dug up]]. She's still in the ground. All them trolls are doing between their forums and their lies and their dang rumors they spread is just blowing a bunch of ''smoke''. So, what do you '[[mumbles]'' believe a bunch of smoke? No. Because all there is is smoke is just a bunch of lies. So there. And also, I am going to ignore the trolls and they are not going to bother me anymore. I am regaining control of my life. They have played with me long enough and they're not going to play with me anymore. I'm not going to let them. Now, also I will say another thing ''[starts digging into his pocket, fishing out some sort of string.]'' Haters. ''[Twirls string]'' Gonna hate. Pew. ''[Throws it, turns off camera]''

Talk:Chris and negotiation

2010-09-04T15:06:33Z

Loserbrain:

==Deletion==
I really think there's not enough basis for this page. This is a really interesting topic but not really something encyclopedic and this really comes off as more of an essay sort of deal. I think a lot of this can be summarized in one sentence in [[autism]] that "Chris is incapable of seeing other people's point of view." Thoughts?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:36, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
:*Champthom, much like [[User:Beat|some other people]] is always right. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 16:51, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
:It might fit better in [[Chris and his Ego]] under Manifestations. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 16:57, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
::Actually, I think it would belong more so in [[Chris and Reality]]. Chris ALWAYS comes to the conclusion that if someone, even a troll, makes a promise, they absolutely have to and will live up to that promise. It's like with the recent "Break your PS3 for 9000 dollars" deal or when Max was holding "Julie" hostage. Basically, a case of unrealistic expectations. --[[User:Miss Noel|Noel Ari Paige]] 23:26, 3 September 2010 (PDT)

Actually this page came as a request from yoko after this last saga, I was going to put it together myself, after a bit more of the events recent events are made "public", but I see someone's jumped the gun and started it without me. There's plenty of material that can go into the article that has it's own merit, mostly involving the frustrations many trolls experience in manipulating the 2010 era Chris, who cares only for his PS3. I'll see what I can do to improve the article with some REDACTED materials, but yeah, this article is a special request, so we should improve it rather than throw it out. --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 17:12, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
*I know Yoko requested it but that doesn't mean it should be done. I really dislike these sort of pages because while they're interesting, they're more or less opinion pieces and mostly opinion. It's junk food - it tastes good but it's not good for you.
:If we REALLY had to do this article, I'd focus more on times Chris has had to negotiated, how he did so, and the outcome versus the intended income as opposed to going on about why Chris can't compromise and tactics (the latter I would briefly visit, see if there are actual tactics here. Some [[Wikipedia:game theory|game theory]] would be useful here). But frankly, I really don't see why this deserves an entire article on a narrow topic and the fact that this can be summarized as "Chris can't negotiate."--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:49, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
** The way it is phrased now I can see what you mean champ, but I'd give it a couple days before acting on it. It's getting a lot of work and it just popped up, there is absolutely documentation of this shit, it just has to be synced up with the article. Whatever you do is what you do, but give it a little bit and see what it turns into. It isn't some furry's shitty self insert Sonichu fanfic, its something that at its core is intended to be relevant to Chris and is meant to serve a purpose. [[User:Sully|Sully]] 23:07, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
*Again, a lot of the reason that yoko and I wanted the article done was to highlight recent events and show what it's like to deal with Chris on an inter-personal basis. It's a common misconception among younger trolls that we just tell Chris to do something, and then he goes out and does it. In reality, it's all dependent on his whims and motivations. The problem is, this is very obvious in some of the more recent events that can't be added to the cwciki yet. This article got started a few weeks too early, and right now it's just serving as a repository of how Chris has dealt with trolls in the past. I'm considering what you said about intent vs outcome, and that might be a good way to go. As it stands right now, I separated the article into examples and Chris' usual tactics, and I see people have been kind enough to flush them out for me. I'm going to sleep on it, and think about how to proceed. I see what your saying Champ, but do we have a place on the wiki to document what interacting with Chris is really like? --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 00:41, 4 September 2010 (PDT)

==Other Bargaining situations==
Back when Chris was being black mailed into singing okay to be gay/humping his ps3. he kept demanding that Jack gave him the names of the people that worked on the psn. The only reason Jack kept making him sing the song was cause he was doing it wrong/changing the lyrics. Might wanna read the Samantha emails to get the better details[[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 22:40, 3 September 2010 (PDT)

Gotta write about the whole Audiobook profit negotiation with Vivian. I'm not doing it because my english sucks major balls. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 08:06, 4 September 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Chris and negotiation

2010-09-04T15:05:21Z

Loserbrain: /* Other Bargaining situations */

Talk:Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails

2010-09-03T00:39:53Z

Loserbrain:

i'm too lazy to add commentary so uh, yeah, any questions i'll clarify here. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 15:37, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
*Background and context would be useful here.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:54, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
**okay, i posted up a thing saying rewards for chris to have gay sex, patti bones and ps3 destruction. i posted this all over the world. chris heard about it and he wanted in on it. needless to say, he failed. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 16:00, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
*I'll be here if anyone needs commentary on my part.[[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 16:04, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
**Basically some trolls created a forum called the trolling train. They discussed rewards for deeds of trolling. One of which included breaking into 14 Branchland court, and smashing Chris's PS3, offering a $9001 reward. One of the trolls, our very own jenkinsjinkies, who just happened to have moved into 12 branchland court accepted the mission. Unfortunately, some faggot white knight told Chris about the trolling train forum, and chris decided to steal the honest hard working jinkies $9001 like how he tried to steal kacey, by smashing his perfectly functioning PS3, instead of just selling it. Now he wants the money for trolling himself (if thats even possible) [[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 16:05, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
*The white knight is irrelevant.[[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 16:07, 2 September 2010 (PDT)

Is the "Penny" referred to here PandaHalo's kid? [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 16:09, 2 September 2010 (PDT)

I don't see why it's essential to REDACT trollingtrain. Chris obviously knows about it and Cwcki's purpose is to illuminate, not keep fellow trolls in the dark. There's a definite need for secrecy while a plan is going on, but once the emails are leaked I think it's a mistake to keep that censorship going and against the spirit of the wiki.

EDIT: One question. Is the formatting a completely separate incident, which prompted him to destroy his PS3 to claim the reward (since it was borked anyways?) Or were we involved in causing that as well? And is there any info on this new girlfriend available, or is Chris just Chloeing us again? [[User:Sygerrik|Sygerrik]] 16:23, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
*>'''is there any info on this new girlfriend available, or is Chris just Chloeing us again?'''
Take a guess, my good man. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 16:43, 2 September 2010 (PDT)

Does the "paying off the debts with my father" thing have something to do with the fraud Bob was talking about during the Mathew Noble call? - [[User:Captainhowdy|Captainhowdy]] 16:51, 2 September 2010 (PDT)

Around where I gave him the address the first time. I think it would be important to add commentary that the address was at the precise spot of the GamePlace.[[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 17:06, 2 September 2010 (PDT)

Why dont you tell him that youve sent the money to JJ? Id like to see a post by him telling the trolling train how Chris is sifting through his mail every day looking for the money since they are neighbours. [[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 17:30, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
*This is a brilliant idea. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 17:39, 2 September 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails

2010-09-02T23:43:10Z

Loserbrain:

CWCki:General

2010-08-07T21:46:08Z

Loserbrain: /* chris at faf again */

__NEWSECTIONLINK__

{{Community Portal}}

For discussion that doesn't fit into the other community pages - though do keep it related to the CWCki.

==Hey people, how about those Mumble chats?==
I've started a "10 minutes at a time" project to finish transcribing mumbles. Transcribing sucks, but 10 minutes in one go can relieve the strain on the people transcribing. Especially since if we get 10 or more people on board, transcribing a Mumble can be finished in the space of a couple of days instead of one person over the course of 10 days. I have a couple of people on board, but it would be nice to have several more. For the specifics of how it works, go to my [[User:Fuckingstupid|user page]]. [[Mumble_7|The Mumble chat we are currently tackling is #7]]. It would be nice if anyone who has a couple spare hours a day to transcribe a simple 10 minutes. Thanks in advance. --[[User:Fuckingstupid|Fuckingstupid]] 22:25, 22 July 2010 (UTC)

== Chris and Love Suggestion? ==
I was thinking we should add a new article on the "Chris and...." series. Perhaps "Romance"? Maybe give an insight on his idea of being romantic. I feel we could write good article on this. There's a shit load of cheesy awkward sayings. Also,an observation on his behavior on dates with trolls could be good. Just a thought. --[[User:Bealtespip122]]

* Not a bad idea. Because Chris has blurred the line between romance and sex. With him, it's one in the same. Would be interesting to poke at I think. [[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]]

Aye, "romance" to him is just a means to an end. He sees act of dating as not about two people enjoying each others company, it's just to test compatibility so they can eventually fuck. Anything beyond that is just a ruse to keep the woman interested. I can't imagine him having a sincere desire to have an emotional connection with another human being, he just wants to be coddled and pleased. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 05:10, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

*[[Love quest]] more or less seems to cover this.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:38, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

*I'd say the Love Quest really covers his attempts at "reelin' in da ladiez" and being thwarted by outside forces. Not so much as a personal insight into what Chris thinks is romantic or sweet. --[[User:Bealtespip122|Bealtespip122]] 16:31, 16 July 2010 (UTC)
** Rather than being covered by the love quest page, it's just mentioned; same treatment for [[Chris and sex]]. The events of the Megan, Ivy, and Wallflower sagas tell a lot about his view of romance. Can't forget the essential McDonald's date either. Without some good writing, though, it might not make the best article. --[[User:Schuzrum-dias|Schuzrum Dias]] 17:35, 16 July 2010 (UTC)
*well he wanted to make " Date Education" apart from sex education, i think a chris and romance, detailing what he thinks is romance would be a nice add to the cwcki.---[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 17:13, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

== Fridays After Five yet again ==

This probably isn't a big surprise to anyone, but Chris was also at Fridays After Five on July 16th. No pictures, I'm afraid. He was wearing a bright orange sleeveless shirt with what looked like a beer logo on the back and holding a Budweiser aluminum bottle, a little mini fan made to look like an iPod, and a hula hoop for some reason. Most importantly he had a sort of basic attraction sign with him, nothing elaborate or directly sexual but it said something like "Friendly and Flirty Man Zone" or something similar to that and with more smaller text under that I couldn't make out. He was sitting on the back grass part and left a few minutes before the music was over. I would have loved to catch Chris's attempts at using the hula hoop, I bet that was funny as hell. [[User:Camelopardalis|Camelopardalis]] 03:25, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
*Good work. Mind getting some pictures next time? [[User:CrassCrab|CrassCrab]] 03:28, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
**If I get to Charlottesville again when it's going on, I'll see what I can do. [[User:Camelopardalis|Camelopardalis]] 03:53, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
::*No pressure. It's your prerogative. [[User:CrassCrab|CrassCrab]] 03:59, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
:::* If you're some tard trying to get attention, fuck you, die. I have to put that disclaimer in nowadays, nothing personal. If you're being TRUE and HONEST, thank you so much for reporting this, because Chris holding something that says "Friendly and Flirty Man Zone" would be the most unintentionally hilarious thing that has ever happened. [[User:Sully|Sully]] 05:33, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
::::* Oh no, this is very real. I have another person confirming the hula hoop thing. The man zone thing is what confirms it. Yeah. It's pretty damn retarded. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 06:30, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
::::* Holy shit, I'm just trying to help out during a dry spell and I'm even willing to try going back and get pics, and your reaction is "fuck you, die"? May I also point out that this very site has a giant banner across the top of the main page making in very clear that they want all sightings reported? What on earth is wrong with you? [[User:Camelopardalis|Camelopardalis]] 14:12, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
:::::*Well, I say thanks for your assistance. Clyde confirms what is obviously good intel. Pics are nice, but hey. Nice find anyhow. Keep up the great work. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 15:01, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
::::::*Since we have confirmation, I guess I'll add this as a sighting to the Fridays after five article. Thanks a bunch Camelopardalis.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 16:16, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
:::::::*Thanks, guys. To answer some of the "What, no pictures?!" sentiment, I went there to listen to some music and didn't really expect to see anything photo-worthy. These are local bands that usually play in bars and so on. Lots of people didn't bring cameras, especially as the band was a country-bluegrass bunch, not exactly Lady Gaga. I'll definitely have a camera along next time, just in case. [[User:Camelopardalis|Camelopardalis]] 01:51, 20 July 2010 (UTC)
:::::::*Oh, and I think I can explain the hula hoop. If you look at the pictures of Chris at FAF on July 9, the wide shots taken from inside the seats area, not the close-up one on CWCki, there's two young girls and apparently their moms using hula hoops right behind him. I know the general opinion is Chris isn't a pedo, but all it takes is some basic logic that he observed little girls hula hooping at FAF and then brought one the next week himself. Not that creepy behavior is anything new for Chris but following up the kid-photographing incident with this? [[User:Camelopardalis|Camelopardalis]] 02:09, 20 July 2010 (UTC)

== "fan works purge", including TV Tropes even here ==

[http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/Special:Log/delete Partying like it's 1937] makes me kinda sad. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 05:42, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
* Meh. That Tropes "article" was one of the biggest crimes in CWCki history, and the Charles Wilbur Crushman thing was the first online item I've come across that was such a steaming pile of shit I could actually smell it. The rest I have no comment on, but there was so much selfsucking garbage on here that it justified a deletion policy, and it probably justified said deletion as well. [[User:Sully|Sully]] 05:48, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

::Crimes against the people, I guess. Goodbye [http://www.youropinionsarewrong.com/images/random/stalin-airbrush.jpg Comrade T.V. Tropes], hardly we knew ye. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 06:25, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

:::The whole fan works section was a mistake in the first place. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 06:34, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

::::Counter-revolutionary nest that sabotages and opposes the creative work of the people. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 06:39, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

::::: shut up, you face [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 06:42, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

The fan-works thing started out as a few fun little comics and stories that where just basically bored people fucking around and satirizing Chris' shit. Then people started taking it seriously, or trying to become e-famous, or just generally being self important and retarded. The good "fan-works" can be archived and stored elsewhere, because unless it's specifically relevant to Chris or a Chris event it really doesn't belong here.

More importantly, most of the fan-works sucked metric ass, and it was bringing in a massive collection of morons that where really starting to fag up the place. Personally, I think the "fan-works purge" is the best thing to happen to the CWCki in a long time.

: I know I'm late to comment on this, but good grief, am I glad some of the stupid things I did were deleted. Was the whole purpose of the fan works section to make any contributors to realise they suck? =) --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 03:02, 6 August 2010 (PDT)

== this community portal split idea was retarded ==
a very good post by clydec age 9 [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 06:37, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
*WARNED YOU ABOUT THE SPLIT, BRO.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:00, 23 July 2010 (UTC)

== Look what I did ==

I made a couple of userboxes. Use them, disdain/ridicule them, or improve them as you see fit.

—Preceding [[Wikipedia:Signatures|unsigned]] comment added by [[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] ([[User talk:SeventhBase|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/SeventhBase|contribs]]) 
:Nice work - just enhancing your template links and signing your posts. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 17:20, 21 July 2010 (UTC)
:: no these are stupid [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 04:54, 22 July 2010 (UTC)
::More userboxes are not really what we need right now. --[[User:Fuckingstupid|Fuckingstupid]] 22:30, 22 July 2010 (UTC)

== new idea for speculation ==
speculation runs high. split that up into multiple pages or something [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 04:54, 22 July 2010 (UTC)

==Chris and relationships==
Just a short idea: There are several categories regarding Chris relationships, aquaintances (for example [[Galpals|Galpals]] "Males Chris doesn't hate") orjust general people he interacted with. I think it might be beneficial to have a kind of overview regarding what people he interacted with in what timeline. Could also be linked under "friends" etc. in order to illustrate the extent of his growing social isolation and successive personal development. -- [[User:Miela|Miela]] 13:22, 24 July 2010 (UTC)

== July 23 Fridays After Five ==

I was at FAF this weekend, didn't stay for the whole thing, I was gone by about 7:30 or so but as far as I could tell Chris wasn't there. Actually the whole thing was pretty dead compared to the usual turnout, especially the lawn area which was almost empty. Heat index was something like 110, so I can't blame him for staying home, unless the reason was that Chris feels he's too heavily monitored at FAF these days. I did remember one more thing about Chris at FAF last week though, he had on dark wraparound sunglasses on... UNDER his regular eyeglasses. [[User:Camelopardalis|Camelopardalis]] 22:25, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
:I guess that confirms his shades aren't prescription. Makes sense, he chose the cheapest frames available for his glasses, why would be spend the money for something expensive like prescription sunglasses? --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 22:28, 24 July 2010 (UTC)

==Modnation Levels==
I don't suppose anybody's actually played any of Chris's levels or anything?

It's completely understandable if nobody wants to play them, given that it's Chris, I'm sure they're all garbage, but currently all we have on his modnation efforts are a bunch of tiny screencaps I took from the website. We covered all of his LBP nonsense in detail, it's kinda weird that nobody's even tried to look into his tracks.

Any intrepid PS3 owners wanna step up?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 21:30, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

I don't know if anyone else has suggested it already, but I've got a feeling that one of the best ways to reach (and troll) Chris right now is through ModNation, considering he probably spends most of his time there. Just track him down, join him in a game, "befriend" and chat with him... then beat him silly on his own levels and expect lulz. --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 06:47, 28 July 2010 (UTC)

I'm sure everyone would appreciate good let's-play videos of the ModNation levels (along the lines of the LBP owl level preview video). Does ModNation allow recording/playing back online matches? Dramatic replays and dreadful overanalysis of Chris's online games would be terribly appreciated. I mean, I don't watch motorsports, but microsecond-by-microsecond commentary on clumsy moves just might be worth watching. =) --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 10:35, 28 July 2010 (UTC)

==Just a question==
Not sure it this is the right place to ask or talk about a question or if this is old news but forgive me if I am wrong about anything, but may I ask whats the deal with the Cwiki and /cwc/ fighting and every thing can't find anything about whats going?--[[User:Kota88|Kota88]] 15:47, 28 July 2010 (UTC)
*As far as I'm aware, there isn't anything. If you're talking about Delebonte being a fag and making a shittalk template, that doesn't have to do with /cwc/. /cwc/, as I see it, is a place where people go to talk about Chris. It's the watercooler where everyone goes to provide their own theories without threat of retribution. Cwcki is a place where facts are documented and presented. They don't really conflict, and /cwc/ doesn't really seem to be vandalising this site or anything, so I guess you just have bad information. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 15:49, 28 July 2010 (UTC)
Ok thanks, what I got was something about something about legi0n or who ever being mad about furrys being on the cwciki and users being blacklisted by someone but idk, I can't look a the thread right now because when ever i got to the /cwc/ I keep getting the message saying "Website Disabled". but anyway thanks for clearing this up a little for me.--[[User:Kota88|Kota88]] 16:02, 28 July 2010 (UTC)
*I can probably explain that one. People on /cwc/ follow most of the same "rules" as other imageboards (e.g. 4chan, 7chan, etc.) and as such tend to ban furries and stuff because they spam their boards with fetish porn. On the CWCki, this isn't an issue, and so we have a more lax set of rules. For people who don't understand the difference between the two systems, they might be led to believe that we are a furry site, when in fact we are just tolerant. I wouldn't worry about it too much. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 16:10, 28 July 2010 (UTC)

==Old News (Possible Bulbapedia incident)==

Hey, newfag here. On Bulbapedia, there was apparently a small battle over whether or not to make Sonichu as a page, with Chris (obviously) being the sole supporter. A user posted quotes from their supposed discussion here: http://bmgf.bulbagarden.net/blog.php?b=15577 Considering said user had no idea who Sonichu was at the time of this discussion, or shortly before I told him a few hours earlier, I'm betting money it actually happened. Thing is, this happened in August of last year, so where should it go? - [[User:CypherFDP|CypherFDP]] 12:47, 30 July 2010 (EST)
:(Are you Brazilian/Portuguese by any chance?) I can't really confirm it's him. The use of "OVER 9" (like that stupid meme), incorrect use of "Your" (he's stupid, but that's not one of his quirks), NOT censoring the F-word with asterisks, as well as calling you a troll outright (though I wouldn't put it past him, frankly) and declaring the "reality" of Sonichu out in the open (he does probably believe this, but he would only insinuate it)... These are rather consistent with a copycat troll than the TRUE and HONEST Chris-chan. But if we DO get a confirmation, it should go in its own article, along with a Da Update showing that new information was unearthed.--[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 05:05, 30 July 2010 (UTC)
*No, I was born in the Philippines, grew up in America. But anyway, I doubt we'll get any sort of confirmation, Chris has most likely long forgotten about this. I suppose I can ask if any of the conversation is left, but I don't think it'll prove anything. - [[User:CypherFDP|CypherFDP]] 1:10, 30 July 2010 (EST)
**Well, this is the only other edit he made. "I would like you to know that Sonichu is a REAL Pokemon. I know, because I have over 9 years of canon from him and his world, and have been in talks with Nintendo to put Sonichu and Rosechu into animal crossing, and have been in talk with Sega to make a Sonichu video game. Please consider this. Thank you. I will dare to keep my dreams alive." Hmm. Yeah, from the looks of it, it appears it was nothing more than a poser. I doubt even Chris would say something like that. Of course, I'm a newfag so make of it what you will. - [[User:CypherFDP|CypherFDP]] 1:55, 30 July 2010 (EST)
**Chris wouldn't mention the talks with Nintendo after finding out the people behind that were trolls. Too much wounded pride.--[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 11:44, 30 July 2010 (UTC)
***Well, the talks with Nintendo and Sega were mentioned at 02:33, 24 August 2009 (UTC), and all the discussion in the blog started about two minutes afterward, with Chris replying at 02:58. There's also a little bit of discussion above the Sonichu topic on his user talk page, but he didn't respond to that. Here's the link to his User Talk page: http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/User_talk:CWCSonichuChandler, and here's the link to the other bit Chris supposedly said.: http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/User_talk:Evkl#Re:_Fake_Pages - [[User:CypherFDP|CypherFDP]] 10:56, 30 July 2010 (EST)

== Why are some people so eager to ban Chris everywhere on the Internet? ==

Including the people here on CWCki? Where's the fun in Chris crashing into PS3 slumber again? Damn, I wish Chris was allowed back to deviantART :( --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 05:10, 30 July 2010 (UTC)

More to the point, is there an official policy regarding stupid ass bullshit like "[[CWCipedia]] states that Chris may or may not create another account. Be sure to tip off the dA admins if he will return."? I think there should be.
*Overenthusiastic nobodies eager to 'stick it' to Chris and be the #1 trolin genious lolololo. It's quite irritating, and seems as if they have zero forethought. And I can only see this problem getting worse as time goes on and Chris becomes more mainstream. Feels bad man. - [[User:Beemunk|Beemunk]] 14:46, 30 July 2010 (UTC)

Chris is known to act out a lot, and on deviantART, acting out is considered trolling and it will get you banned. Also the fact that nobody wants him around. [[User:LAG4U|LAG4U]] 15:05, 30 July 2010 (UTC)

The same reason he gets banned from places IRL. --[[User:MoarDesu|MoarDesu]] 02:24, 1 August 2010 (UTC)

More times often than not, Chris does a good job of getting himself banned, better than the trolls at times: for example, his continued uploading of NSFW material to [[Flipnote Hatena]] damned him more than trolls could. The problem with Chris is his un realistic expectation that he is exempt to normal rules, an expectation that will continue to bite him in the ass. [[User:CosmicFeeling|CosmicFeeling]] 11:47, 3 August 2010 (PDT)

== Chris's handwriting ==

Does anyone have a slightly recent example of Chris's handwriting? I just read a book on analyzing handwriting for character traits, and I want to see what I can pick out of him. Don't worry, I'll write the summary on my user page. I just need a sample. --[[User:GandWuser|GandWuser]] 16:41, 2 August 2010 (PDT)
:[[Chris's Letter to Blanca|2008 should be recent enough]] --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 16:48, 2 August 2010 (PDT)
:: OK thank you. --[[User:GandWuser|GandWuser]] 17:32, 2 August 2010 (PDT)
:::The [[List of Flipnotes|Flipnotes]] should be the most recent example. --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 18:26, 2 August 2010 (PDT)
::::The problem with those though is that they don't show pressure of his writing.

Anyways, I finished. [[User:GandWuser|Read it on my Userpage.]] --[[User:GandWuser|GandWuser]] 18:34, 2 August 2010 (PDT)

== Scripts for Sonichu TAS ==

Would it be fine to add scripts from the Sonichu Animated Series to the CWCiki? [[User:CosmicFeeling|CosmicFeeling]] 11:40, 3 August 2010 (PDT)
:The page is locked, so you'd have to ask an admin. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 11:46, 3 August 2010 (PDT)
::Who are the admins on the CWCiki? [[User:CosmicFeeling|CosmicFeeling]] 19:18, 3 August 2010 (PDT)
:::That would be [[User:cogsdev|these]] [[User:Clydec|fine]] [[User:Champthom|people]]. I suggest putting the scripts on your namespace until they're ready for release. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 22:27, 3 August 2010 (PDT)

== Spotted Chris at Game Stop ==

Another sighting! I went over to the GameStop at the mall and lo and behold, Christian Weston Chandler in all his glory. He was wearing jeans and plain gray shirt that was too small for him. I say too small because his chest was definitely accentuated and they came up a wee bit too shirt for a T-Shirt to be at. He was checking out the PS Triple section the majority of the time. I happened to look over my shoulder at one point and there he was, bent over with his tighty whities pulled up too far on his body, his shirt coming up rather far over his back. What he was bent over for, I have no idea. I turned back to what I was looking at and he was sighing periodically over who knows what. Then I heard, "kick da hex-box...kick da hex-box...kick da hex-box..." I had to look. He was kicking a row of X-Box games while saying it. It wasn't hard enough to knock things over, but still...what the fuuuuuck? The employee gave him a glance but didn't say anything. I'm assuming he does this on a regular basis that they just ignore him. Now that I think back on it, he was probably sighing because the PS Triple section is right next to the X-Box section and he was getting stuh-ressed that the games were touching. He left shortly after that so I was able to look at the vidya with no further disturbances.

I later decided to get a bite to eat at the Sbarros and holy shit, there was the lumberjack and the Snorlax feasting on Chick-Fil-A. They both wore baseball caps and you could definitely tell the past couple of years(or however old the most recent pictures of them were taken) haven't been kind to them. I have some unfortunate news that the Snorlax isn't as fat as she used to be(from the one picture we have). In fact, her legs were incredibly skinny. Probably even skinnier than Chris'. Her clothing looked like it hung from her loosely. She could just have the same oddly shaped body that Chris has. Either way, she didn't really look that healthy. Bob was very scruffy(probably can't shave because of his age) and shuffled around with a slight hunch. A little while later, Chris joined them before they all got up and left. Chris' underwear was bunched up over his pants and sticking out. Chris walked with his mother out, his arm around her and rubbing her back. I overheard him tell his mom, "I love you, mother." Uuuuuuh, yeeeeah. About 10-20 seconds later, Bob shuffled up behind them. And that was it. He continues to blow my mind. [[User:Danny|Danny]] 22:07, 6 August 2010 (PDT)
* Ho-Ho-Holy shiiiiiiiit...! I could understand Barb's thinness (that diet after getting sick awhile back must have been murder on her), but Chris actually kicking X-Box games while saying "kick da hex-box"? That just takes the cake! I wish I knew what was going through the storeowner's head when he saw that. Hopefully the same thing everyone else was: what the fuck?--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 22:13, 6 August 2010 (PDT)
*That... That's just ridiculous. And here I thought Chris was beyond things a five year old would do. No pics, I assume? :( - [[User:CypherFDP|CypherFDP]] 1:55, 7 August 2010 (EST)
**Barb definitely has AIDS. -[[User:Beemunk|Beemunk]] 23:08, 6 August 2010 (PDT)
**This is still an eyewitness sighting of Chris, so we're going to have to update the [[August 2010]] article. Any information or sighting is helpful to us. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:09, 6 August 2010 (PDT)
*If he starts to frequent the store, look for the slightest excuse to get him banned. Anything that keeps Chris from buying more games is worth it. --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 00:02, 7 August 2010 (PDT)
*ewww chris wants to do it with his mom. thats like barf central and not just because of the incest either --This post has been brought to you by [[User:ShotgunJones|ShotgunJones]] 08:54, 7 August 2010 (PDT). Thanks for reading!

== chris at faf again ==

Sighted chris at fridays after five. He was wearing grey shirt, girly fitting jeans, and his trucker vest. Spotted a pokewalker on each of his hips. No rocks or hoolahoops sighted, but the highlight was him doing a sort of dance waddle/dance where he would slowly turn in circles with both of his index fingers pointed in the air. Making sheepish eye contact with random people, and revealing a very forced looking smile. When i wandered past him while he was doing this on the side grass near the bandstand I could hear him muttering/singing "do a little dance, make a little love, do a little dance, make a little love".
:No pictures, I assume? Either way, this is still helpful to us. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 11:06, 7 August 2010 (PDT)
*care to tell us how you managed to observe this scene from canada? --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 11:31, 7 August 2010 (PDT)
**Ouch. -- [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 14:46, 7 August 2010 (PDT)

File talk:Hulahoop.png

2010-07-25T06:51:04Z

Loserbrain:

How do you guys keep finding this stuff? O_o -- [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 06:29, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
*Field agents. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 06:51, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

Fridays After Five

2010-07-25T06:28:58Z

Loserbrain:

[[File:WantWoman.jpg|thumb|left|140px|You know he's [[straight]] because his [[bra]] says so.]]
[[Image:Fa5 2colorlogo.jpg|thumb|200px|Chris's new [[attraction Location|prowling ground]]]]
'''Fridays After Five''' is a large block party/concert series that takes place in [[Charlottesville]] from spring until fall. In [[June 2010]] [[Chris]] was video recorded there, [[C-Ya Later|enjoying real life for once]].

Chris first mentioned Fridays After Five in a [[6 June 2010|video]] explaining his near hit-and-run on [[Michael Snyder]]. Based upon this knowledge, the manchild has been attending the event since at least 4 June 2010. Chris first alludes to his knowledge of Fridays after Five in the video [[Rollin' and Trollin']], in which he stands outside the Charlottesville Pavilion and mentions how [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] play there every Friday night.

== 18 June Sighting==
{{-}}
[[Image:Chrisgirl1.jpg|thumb|left|Chris trying to pick up a [[boyfriend-free girl]].]]
[[Image:Dancing.gif|right]]

On 18 June 2010, Chris went to one of these events and a good samaritan ([[YouTube]] name [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]) took these videos and pictures of him out in public.

According to the author, Chris wore a T-shirt that says "I Enjoy [[Vagina]]" and was wearing a "[[gay]] circular thing" on his hip which is most likely his [[PokeWalker of Fail|PokéWalker]]. At some point Chris pulled back his crude shirt to reveal his [[obesity|flabby gut]] and [[muscle bra|female support wear]], which he had apparently seen fit to write "[[Love Quest|WANT WOMAN!]]" on with permanent marker. Note the apparent, inexplicable (knowing Chris) absence of the [[Medallion_of_Fail|Medallion of Fail]] - although it could have been removed just temporarily in order to simplify the (probably planned) act of pulling back the shirt.

Chris's clothing indicates he is looking to put a new twist on his [[Love_Quest|old tricks]]. Like the [[Attraction_sign|attraction sign]], Chris is shown making a point to display the writing on his clothing, declaring that he "enjoys vagina" and "wants woman". This is yet another example that this [[autistic]] man-child does not learn from the mistakes of his past. Also, the videos filmed at this event mostly showed the back of Chris's head, which shows a small but emerging [[bald]] spot.

Besides exposing his covered bosom to potential [[sweetheart]]s - mostly [[pedofork|severely underage]] - Chris spent his time at the event [[Flipnote Hatena|drawing flipnotes]] on his [[Nintendo]] DSi, and trying to dance with a disturbing mix of Chicken Dance and [[autism]] - with all the grace and skill of [[CWC Fighter]].

It is unlikely that Chris was aware of being photographed, which proves that all these actions are Chris's idea of being normal. When Chris eventually realized (or it seemed so) he was being observed, he suddenly disappeared like Batman.

== 9 July Sighting ==

[[File:FAF-06092010.jpg|thumb|right|Chris sat on his fat ass - a truly rare sight.]]
On 9 July, the troll who spotted Chris on [[McIntire Park#Independence Day Sighting |Independence Day]] spotted him again. According to the troll, Chris had unscrewed the zoom lens from his DSi and was using it as a rudimentary telescope by pressing it up to his eye.

The troll goes on to report that Chris appeared to creep out a nearby high school girl by turning to her and saying something. This resulted in the girl huddling up with a group of her friends, who all proceeded to laugh at Chris. He probably never realized that the girls were laughing at him, not with him.

This time the troll managed to take a picture of Chris, who appears to be wearing three [[Pokéwalker of Fail|Pokéwalkers of Fail]]. Two are red and white, and a custom painted one is barely visible underneath his arm. He also has what looks like a small bottle of hand sanitizer tucked into his belt. Chris [[The_GAMe_PLACe|has been known]] to immediately follow up any handshake with using hand sanitizer on himself. Chris is also holding a [[Attraction Sign|small piece of paper]] between his legs in both photographs, proving even further that he hasn't learned a single thing in the past seven years.

The troll's report in full:

{{quotebox|
Sorry for not adding more with the pictures, but I did notice that Chris had taken his DSi zoom lense(thanks for clarifying that up for me, guys) off his DSi and was using it as a telescope. He had it pressed up against his eye and was constantly watching around him with it for awhile. He also had this habit of taking off and putting on his sunglasses within seconds of each other. It seemed like he paid more attention to what was going on around him than what was happening at the concert. At one point, I noticed a girl, who looked like she was probably still in highschool, jump up on the ledge beside Chris to join a group of friends who happened to be stationed behind the manbaby. In the process, Chris turned to her and it looked like he said something to her, because immediately her facial expression changed from a legit happy one to a forced smile one. She joined up with her friends and they immediately huddled up together, whispering about something. At the same time they all looked up at Chris, and laughed. I can only imagine what he had said to the poor girl. A few moments later, one of the guys in the group picked up his cell phone and snapped a picture of Chris from behind. Maybe he's aware of who Chris is and will share his story somewhere. At that point, whether or not Chris realized they were making fun of him, he picked up his stuff and switched seating spots. I chose to take my leave at that point.}}
{{clear}}

==16 July Sighting==

[[File:Manzone.jpg|thumb|right|Something like this.]]

On 16 July a different troll managed to spot Chris at the park. While no photos were taken the description given paints a very... ''unusual'' picture.

While the initial footage from June introduced the "Want Women" bra as a sort of makeshift attraction sign, the most recent sighting reports a full-fledged return of an actual [[attraction sign]], albeit a very basic one.

The hula hoop is more puzzling. It's entirely possible that Chris brought it to add to the dance moves seen on this very page, but given Chris's [[Sonichu's Edge|abysmally low stamina]], [[obesity|corpulent physique]], and total lack of coordination or dancing ability, this seems like a very unusual choice. Another theory is that he used it to mark the boundaries of his "Friendly and Flirty Man Zone".

{{quotebox|This probably isn't a big surprise to anyone, but Chris was also at Fridays After Five on July 16th. No pictures, I'm afraid. He was wearing a bright orange sleeveless shirt with what looked like a beer logo on the back and holding a Budweiser aluminum bottle, a little mini fan made to look like an iPod, and a hula hoop for some reason. Most importantly he had a sort of basic attraction sign with him, nothing elaborate or directly sexual but it said something like "Friendly and Flirty Man Zone" or something similar to that and with more smaller text under that I couldn't make out. He was sitting on the back grass part and left a few minutes before the music was over. I would have loved to catch Chris's attempts at using the hula hoop, I bet that was funny as hell.}}

==Gallery==
{{-}}
<center>
<gallery>
File:100 0669.JPG|The return of the King.
File:100 0670.JPG|[[100 2178|All alone.]]
File:100 0671.JPG|Fuck yeah! A [[gal-pal]]!
File:100 0673.JPG|The gal pal's gone...
File:100 0674.JPG|Oh! Potential new gal-pals!
File:100 0676.JPG|Creepy...
File:100 0677.JPG|...fucking...
File:100 0678.JPG|...scene.
File:100 0681.JPG|Eventually, an urgent need to [[Flipnote Hatena|DRAW SOME SHIT]] prevails.
File:100 0682.JPG|Chris enjoying the real world. Also, DAT ASSCRACK.
File:100 0683.JPG|Chris has a deep conversation with an 8 year old.
File:100 0693.JPG|A wide shot.
File:100 0694.JPG|A close-up of Chris. Notice that he hasn't bothered to fully remove his shirt.
File:100 0695.JPG|Chris showing off his muscular bosom.
File:100 0696.JPG|LOOK AT THAT GUT GODDAMN
File:100_0697.JPG|Chris trying to look sexy for Da Ladies.
File:Fridayafterplan.png|CWC's plan B.
File:FAF-06092010.jpg|From autistic trucker to dorkish plumber.
File:WantMan.jpg|CWC's [[Homos|plan C]].
File:Hulahoop.png|Chris and the hula hoop.
</gallery>
</center>

==Videos==

{{collapsible
|Videos of Chris in a public place, a rare sight.
|
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = manchild
| video = {{#ev:youtube|J4dib0pmpjE}}
| Stardate = 18 June 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 100_0690.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|tbU7ao0i-Ew}}
| Stardate = 19 June 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 100_0691.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|dDlJ-ZY5Opk}}
| Stardate = 19 June 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 100_0692.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|vdibt4Ll2gs}}
| Stardate = 19 June 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
}}

==See also==
*[[Flipnote Hatena]]
*[[Love Quest]]
*[[Rollin' and Trollin']]
*[[Pedofork]]

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?nkhrmmtjymg Download the videos]
*[http://www.charlottesvillepavilion.com/fridaysafterfive/ Fridays After Five at the Charlottesville Pavilion]

[[Category:Social life]]

File:Hulahoop.png

2010-07-25T06:26:55Z

Loserbrain: Chris and the hula hoop.

Chris and the hula hoop.

User:Loserbrain

2010-07-24T02:22:19Z

Loserbrain:

Loserbrain is alive.
Sort of.
{{Krapplefag}}
{{BlueSpike}}
{{VivianGee}}
{{Agnostic}}

File talk:0695-AnnaBD9.JPG

2010-07-22T13:27:12Z

Loserbrain:

Dead Set Eyes:

Is is just me, or in this photo, it is clear that he is not looking at the camera but setting his sights on the girls sitting across from him? -- [[User:SerenityMoonstone|SerenityMoonstone]] 8:19 July 22, 2010 Eastern Standard Time.

Can't read, no she can't read my rape face. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 13:27, 22 July 2010 (UTC)

Mumble 6

2010-07-22T07:32:05Z

Loserbrain:

'''Mumble 6''' is the sixth of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 10th February 2009.

Length: '''1:57:53'''

== Summary ==

* Chris has received a letter from Nintendo of America stating that he hasn't been in touch with [[Shigeru Miyamoto|Shigeru]] [[Miyamoto Saga|Miyamoto]]. The trolls try to convince him that the letter is fake.
* Chris gives more advice on whether Falsion's friend is a [[homo]] by suggesting he'll be drawn to posters of men more than those of women in the fan's bedroom.
* Julie probes Chris on why he dislikes [[homos]] so much. Chris flounders.
* Chris first made his medallion because he wanted to, before he ever drew any comics and wears it all the time because it's like a nametag. Might make one for Julie.
* Someone hacked [[Sonichu Girls|Sonichugirls.net]]. Julie is outraged.
* Chris doesn't hate all men, just the ones who are jerks, which is the 'majority of the male population'. When called on it, admits he doesn't know how he knows that men are jerks without knowing them.
* Chris doesn't remember saying that transgender people should have surgery. Now says that they shouldn't. Confuses transgender with intersex and says that if he had a child with both organs he would raise it as a boy.
* If Chris was dating a girl and she turned out to have a [[pickle|penis]], he would freak out, throw up and dump her.
* [[Sonic]] replaced [[American Rabbit]] as Chris's favorite cartoon character.
* Chris's favorite soap opera is The Young and the Restless. He used to watch MTV's Undressed.
* Chris feels as if his life is a soap opera, as he's had a lot of drama.
* Chris hasn't decided if there will be a Chris Chandler show. Everyone says it's a great idea.
* Sonic 3D is Chris's favorite Sonic game.
* The Chris Chandler show would be improvised with no commercial breaks. When [[Jack Thaddeus]] calls him on the show needing to make money, Chris says that he [[fail|doesn't know how to make commercials]].
* Chris never received the Jet, Ebony and Vibe magazines that a troll called [[Svenka|hottiee96]] subscribed him to.
* Chris says he's irregular with comics because "It's called a life".
* [[Vivian Gee|Hamsty]] asks what Chris does, considering he has no job. Chris stalls, before saying that [[lie|he can't describe his daily schedule on a whim at the moment]] and had better not say. He blames [[stress]].
* Chris says that he gets [[stress]]ed and needs a day to recover. Fans point out the contradiction of drawing comics to relax and using stress as an excuse not to draw them. Chris says that he feels uncomfortable with the questions.
* Chris does Sonichu's voice. It sounds like Chris, only slightly higher. Fans praise this fantastic rendition.
* Chris says that he would want [[Sonic the Hedgehog#Archie Comics|Archie Comics]] to publish Sonichu.
* There will be no lesbian relationships in Chris' comics, as he promotes heterosexuality.
* Chris obnoxiously cuts off a fan who asks about Nintendo and copyright, saying "I don't know, I don't know, I'm not a business genius."
* They talk about anime and video games. Chris doesn't like the nudity in Shin Chan because dicks 'offend' him.
* Says that him drawing Sonichu with his dick out [[Chris and Hypocrisy|was different because he was wearing a condom]].
* Chris confirms that he ripped off the workings of Sonichu's penis from a line from Brian in [[Family Guy]].
* Chris does not like [[dirty crapped briefs|poo]] in a fetishistic sense.
* Chris can't remember why he admitted his [[dirty crapped briefs]] to Clyde.
* Chris is still trying to upload the Nintendo of America letter.
* The adult scenes in Sonichu are not 'lost content', they are 'removable deleted scenes' and the comic can be read with or without them. [[lie|This is how he designed it]].
* Chris will not undergo speech therapy because he had it when he was a child.
* Chris does a terrible high-pitched impersonation of someone with no front teeth.
* Chris cuts off a question about the PS3 being the main console of the gay community, as he's bothered by it.
* CWCville's employment situation is discussed. Sonichu & Rosechu's job is protecting CWCville and everything is free for them.
* Chris liked the Spice Girls, but didn't have a favorite.
* CWCville was founded just by [[Bob]], shortly after Chris was born.
* Bob told Chris that Sonichu was viable as regards copyrighting. Chris has paid the Library of Congress $35 for copyright years ago and hasn't heard anything.
* Chris has uploaded the Nintendo of America letter. The fans deny that it's real and attempt to discredit it. Chris refuses to listen.
* Chris starts to leave, [[Clyde Cash]] enters. The HONEST and TRUE fans all decry this disgraceful human being.
* Clyde says that Julie is afraid of how her life with Chris will turn out, and that her parents will take her away. Chris protests that he's cleaned his room.
* Clyde says Chris needs to clean up his act to be with Julie, asks if he pays taxes. [[Fail|Chris says he's paid sales tax]].
* Chris pleads the fifth when Clyde asks how much credit card debt he has. When pressed, he admits to having almost $2000 to offset his savings of $100.
* Chris says that if he decides he has to get a job when he and Julie are married, he will.
* Chris claims that he can cook 'anything that's within his cookbook'.
* Chris admits he was lying about looking for jobs he can do with his CADD degree, but he ''can'' start looking. Clyde calls him out on lying to Julie so much, and Chris whines about his "insultive tone".
* Julie says that she's read up on Christianity and there's no premarital sex. Chris says that [[Lie|Methodists are allowed]].
* Chris claims to cook for himself the majority of the week. Says he [[Lie|cooks a lot of things for himself]]. When pressed, he says vegetables, meats and soups, depending on shopping. His parents cook separately from him, as they live on a different floor.
* Chris says he will look for a job, depending on who's hiring. Will think about getting a job now.
* Chris's schedule currently varies from day to day, but he does a lot of creative things. Yesterday he cleaned his room.
* Julie says that drawing comics is currently Chris's job and he should work on it. Chris promises that he will.
* Chris says ''Ich bin schwul'' and leaves.
* [[BlueSpike]] and the others laugh about Chris admitting to being a [[homo]].

== Transcript ==

==== Meet and Greet ====

[The various trolls greet Chris, talking over each other]

'''Julie:''' Heeey Chris!

'''Troll:''' Willkommen!

[sound of junk getting moved around]

'''Troll:''' Hello.

'''Troll:''' Morning!

'''Hamsty:''' Hey Chris!

'''Troll:''' Uhh- hello, Chris! What's up?

'''Troll:''' Hello! How're you doing?

'''Chris:''' [Chris speaks in an effeminate voice] Hellloo...

'''Troll:''' Bonjour.

[''pause'']

'''Troll:''' So what are you up to tonight, Chris?

'''Chris:''' Uhh, nothing much, just uhh... takin' care of things.

'''Troll:''' Aww, that's good.

[Audio cuts out here for a moment. Presumably, the same thing happened in the chat.]

'''Chris:''' Sorry, what?

'''Chris:''' [[BlueSpike|Julie]] bought me here. You asked for me to come and I so I did.

'''Troll:''' Did you... come for your fans at all?

'''Chris:''' Uhh, yeah I came for my fans.

'''Troll:''' Cool.

'''Chris:''' Mmm. Matter of fact I have an update...

'''Troll:''' Oooh?

'''Troll:''' Ohh awesome!

'''Chris:''' But... well unfortunately yeah, it was in a video but it didn't get, uhh, processed quickly enough... I've just had to start re-uploading it.

'''Troll:''' Yeeeah... [[YouTube]]'s really slow at that... depending on what you use. It's a'right.

'''Troll:''' It's like... they need to invest their money more in technology.

==== Chris receives a letter. ====

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Anyway, uhh, as I have already told Julie and [[Sarah May]], mm, I have received a letter in the snail mail today from Mr-

'''Chris:''' I have received a letter in the snail mail today from Nintendo of America's representative Mr. Mike Chandler- no relation- In response to what I have sent Nintendo of America previously. Anyway, it-it-it verifies my uh- families, my friends and uhh... my theory so that, uhh, and I quote, Mr [[Miyamoto Saga|Shigeru Miyamoto]] did not have a meeting scheduled with you, nor has he be- has he been corresponding with you. Mr Miyamoto speaks and writes only-

'''Troll:''' [Talking over Chris] I'll be right back.

'''Chris:''' [very annoyed] -very limited English...! ... and our game development teams do not accept unsolicited game suggestions or other ideas. Although Mr Miyamoto made occasional business trips to the US, he spends the majority of his time in Japan at Nintendo's headquarters. So, in short I've- I've actually been talking to... impostors.

[The trolls begin talking over each other at this point]

'''Troll:''' Well, you don't know if he's an impostor or not, I mean, I mean,

'''Troll:''' Oooooh...

'''Troll:''' You know...

'''Troll:''' I mean, look at that, it had your last name- it didn't really sound legit...

'''Troll:''' Hold on, guys hold on, hold on. Just lemme...

[Brief silence]

'''Troll:''' Well, it could have been intercepted by a troll because he did say that Mr. Miyamoto doesn't speak- speaks limited Jap- I mean, limited English, but... I've seen YouTube videos of him speaking a lot... urn... in English... and... I don't- I think that's a lie- that guy obviously doesn't know anything about Miyamoto.

'''Troll:''' You know, I- I've heard about stuff like this happening, you know, one of my cousins is in the business industry and he says with a lot of these big companies they get mix- things mixed up all the time. Maybe they were sending it to like- maybe they thought you were someone else, or they sent it to somebody who had the wrong address, you know, they can screw stuff up an awful lot.

'''Chris:''' Well anyways, it's an official letter from Nintendo of America, because uhh... the envelope, is-is-is-is just like the previous envelopes I've gotten from Nintendo of America, as well as the uh... letter head on the... letter. It's typed.

[The trolls talk over each other here. The general drift is: "It's easy to forge..."]

'''Chris:''' [annoyed] It was typed.

'''Troll:''' Yeah, it's easy to forge.

'''Chris:''' [still annoyed] It was typed.

[Windows beeping in the background]

'''Chris:''' [yep, still annoyed] [[autism|It was typed]].

[More Windows beeping in the background]

'''Chris:''' And-and-and it has a signature on there.

'''Troll:''' Just because it's typed and it has a signature on there doesn't mean it's real.

'''Troll:''' In fact, wouldn't typing it make it more easier to forge since it's not handwriting?

'''Troll:''' And a signature doesn't mean anything, I mean, you nev- I mean you don't know this guy and so... it's just somebody's signature.

'''Chris:''' Look, I'll tell y'all- look, I'll tell y'all what, I'll scan the envelope AND the letter and put it on the [[CWCipedia|Sonichu site]] [annoyed] LATER [pause; the trolls talk all at once] and y'all- and y'all- can fig- and y'all decide for yourselves from that.

'''Troll:''' We're tryin' to help you, Chris. We're trying to help you and do what's best for you...

'''Troll:''' We're trying to make sure nobody's trying to trick you.

'''Troll:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' We're here to back you up.

[silence]

==== Games, etc. ====

'''Julie:''' Yeah. I can always play it on my [[PS3]], or my Nintendo Wii when I ever get one...

'''Troll:''' Never [[Hex Bawx]].

'''Julie:''' I hate the Hex Bawx.

'''Troll:''' I'm a PC player myself.

[The trolls talk all at once for about 10 seconds]

'''Chris:''' I'm gonna go get the scanner and make it ready to scan.

[some trolls mutter back and forth, mostly silence]

[lengthy pause]

'''Troll:''' ... [whisper] [[pickle|cocks]]!

[The trolls laugh; sound of things moving around and other noise in the background]

'''Julie:''' Can I ask you something, Chris?

'''Various Trolls:''' He's uh, scanning. He's scanning things.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I just got back with it and I'm... scanning it.

==== The Molvanîan Language, et. al. ====

'''Julie:''' Oh hey Chris?

'''Troll:''' Excellent...!

'''Chris:''' Yeah Julie? [Chris sounds disinterested]

'''Julie:''' Can you do me a favor?

'''Chris:''' Sure, what?

'''Julie:''' Can you tell everyone what I taught you today- the new, uhh, [[Molvanîa|Molvanîan]] word?

'''Chris:''' Oooh- ooh. Yeah. Julie uhh... Julie is from [[Molvanîa]]... its uh neigh- its uh-it neighbors- it neighbors 5 countries such as Germany and Slovakia. [pause] Anyway, uhh, she taught me how to say "I love you" in Molvanîa.

[A troll screams in entirely understandable horror, possibly comprehending what will occur next...]

'''Chris:''' [[Homos|Ich- Ich baan schwill]]. [sic]

[Julie says something in the background, something about 'a'right now, okay, keep going']

'''Chris:''' Yeah I just pretty much said it. Ich baan schwill. [sic]

'''Julie:''' Ahh, a'right. I love you too!

'''Chris:''' Yep.

'''Troll:''' You have a gift for languages, Chris.

'''Troll:''' Really!

'''Troll:''' I can see why you pick up [[Ricardo|Spanish]].

'''Troll:''' First Spanish, and now Molvanîan. You're moving on up!

'''Chris:''' Well, right now basically I just have like a few... greetings. And the 'I love you' there.

'''Troll:''' Before you know it you might be speaking Japanese with Mr Miyamoto.

[Chris seems to forget that, just minutes ago, he had decided that 'Miyamoto' was an impostor and doesn't mention it.]

'''Hamsty:''' Or French? [she speaks a little French, but Chris just talks over the top of her]

'''Chris:''' Well, uhh, I know a little bit of Japanese. Like... こんにちは (konichiwa). [awkward pause] And さよなら (sayonara).

'''Hamsty:''' Do you know any French words?

[More Windows beeping in the background]

'''Chris:''' Uhh... wee wee mon amime [sic].

'''Hamsty:''' Ahh... mmm. I see.

'''Chris:''' Omelet du fromage.

'''Hamsty:''' [forced giggle] That's uh, that's that's... very nice. Merci! Merci beaucoup... [another giggle]

'''Chris:''' Merci!

'''Hamsty:''' That means 'thank you'!

'''Chris:''' I know.

'''Hamsty:''' Okay, just making sure! [another 'please don't [[Megan|rape]] me' giggle is squeezed out]

==== Idle Chatter ====

'''Julie:''' So, uh, Chris. How are things?

'''Chris:''' Things are, uh well at home.

'''Julie:''' Awesome!

'''Chris:''' I'm safe and well, and I'm looking forward to you arriving, Julie.

'''Julie:''' Hmm!

[awkward silence]

'''Troll:''' Uhh, what happened last time? You were interrupted by... something.

'''Chris:''' Sorry, what?

'''Troll:''' 'member last time you came? I don't know what happened, but you had to sign off for some reason.

'''Chris:''' I don't 'member that, that was like a long time ago... that was pretty much a long time ago at this point.

'''Troll:''' Uhh, never mind.

'''Troll:''' Yeah...

'''Troll:''' I can't even remember what I had for breakfast. [snort]

'''Hamsty:''' [giggle]

'''Troll:''' Well, it happens, it happens. Sometimes you can remember things from birth... and like, from, childhood years... and sometimes you can't remember things from last week!

'''Troll:''' Stress does influence memory, so it's understandable.

'''Troll:''' Yeah... I suffer from that... occasionally.

[''awkward pause'']

==== Movies ====

'''Troll:''' So Chris, seen any good movies recently?

'''Chris:''' Mmm... good movies, good movies... I saw Saw V?

'''Troll:''' And how was that?

'''Julie:''' Oooh, and what did you think of it?

'''Chris:''' I thought it was- I thought it was neat and very interesting... I mean I saw the previous four... which I have on DVD. But I got Saw V on Bluray.

'''Troll:''' Sounds pretty crazy. Was it scary?

[''awkward pause'']

'''Troll:''' Were the special effects realistic enough to make it seem... scary... enough?

'''Chris:''' Yeah. [''pause'']

'''Troll:''' [[Mailbag 25#It's a trap!|It didn't have enough traps!]] That was my complaint.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I mean uh, I think uh, I think the scariest thing from that movie would be after that- after that guy removed his arm from the- from the saw, and it was like split down to the elbow. But you know-

'''Troll:''' I remember that.

'''Troll:''' Oh, wow!

'''Chris:''' But then- but then you realize from the behind the scenes footage that that actually was just a fake arm.

'''Troll:''' Yeah, well, they wouldn't do that in real life because they would have to, like, pay a lot of people...

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' I mean, like, the special effects they use nowadays is pretty impressive.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' The men were [[jerks]] in that movie, the saw vic- the jigsaw victims. I mean like they let that poor girl- uhh... that poor girl die at the beginning the trap...

'''Chris:''' Yeah. It's like they could- it's like they didn't- it's like, it's like they didn't know at the time they could have gotten away with all five of them alive at the front line through the whole... setup [???]. But uh, still, you know, I mean, the whole setup they had going there... the girl... the woman actually had her head going through a hole in the wall, while there was a whole fake, empty neck on top of it.

'''Troll:''' Yeah... yeah. I just can't believe how much the men were [[jerks]] in that movie. They weren't... especially...

'''Julie:''' Yeah. That movie made me kinda mad...

'''Troll:''' Sexist!

'''Troll:''' Do you think they'll make a sixth... Saw movie?

'''Chris:''' <nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Chris and his ego|Chris speaks as though he were a great authority on the matter]]<nowiki>]</nowiki> Yeah, I think they'll make a Saw VI, I mean- I figured they... you figured they gave the role of Jigsaw over to Detective Hoffman, so he could probably do something in the next one. Plus, I'm still wondering, what was the fate of the uh... doctor. You remember from the first Saw, that uh, that actually cut off his foot?

'''Hamsty:''' Mmm hmm!

'''Troll Chorus:''' Yeah...

'''Chris:''' Well, y-you find out that basically... you find out he's into crawling away [sic? I haven't actually seen anything other than Saw I and II...]. You find him doing that in Saw III. But yeah you don't see anything of him in Saw f-...four, except for that one time when they actually- they talk about that little piece of evidence that went against him in the first Saw.

'''Hamsty:''' [coughs] Mmm. Excuse me.

'''Troll:''' Yeah... Uhh... I never really was into horror. What is it that, uh, makes horror movies so enjoyable?

'''Chris:''' Hmm. I would say probably the, uh, story, and uh...

'''Julie:''' Oh hey Chris, can I ask a question?

'''Chris:''' Yeah?

'''Julie:''' What's your favorite kind of movie?

'''Chris:''' Mmm- I mostly like, uh, romantic comedies.

'''Troll:''' Oh, those can be good. [More Windows beeping]

'''Chris:''' Yeah, they're fun. I've uh- I've uh- gone back to the [[wikipedia:List of Shuffle! episodes|Moonlight Confession episode of Shuffle]]. That's uh, that's episode 10.

'''Troll:''' I prefer animated movies myself, you know... Disney, Pixar...

'''Troll:''' So do I.

[A soft, computer generated 'bong!' noise can be heard in the background]

[Hamsty gasps in the background]

'''Troll:''' I just watched Finding Nemo recently... just this weekend.

'''Chris:''' I liked [[sex toys|Toy]] Story.

'''Troll:''' That was a good one.

'''Troll:''' That is such a classic!

'''Troll:''' My friends and I quote that ALLL the time whenever we watch it.

'''Chris:''' To ef-fenity [sic] and beyond. [Chris gets the 'tone' of the catch-phrase completely, completely wrong; it sounds like some kind of [[Hello, Juffalo|deranged, toneless rap]]<nowiki>]</nowiki>

[short, stunned silence]

'''Troll:''' There's a snake in mah boot! I always liked that line.

'''Troll:''' I [inaudible] Oh, I'm sorry.

'''Chris:''' Sorry, you were saying?

'''Troll:''' I was just saying, I have a toy [[pickle|Woody]], which when you pull the string he says "I have a snake in mah boots"...

'''Chris:''' <nowiki>[</nowiki>[[stress sigh]]<nowiki>]</nowiki> Yep, those were sold in the toy stores.

'''Troll:''' I- I remember in like... one of my favorite type of movies is, um, martial arts.

'''Chris:''' Oh. I saw [[wikipedia:Kung Fu Panda|Kung Fu Panda]] like, recently... on Bluray.

[Possible audio cut here?]

'''Troll:''' Oh. Like, name- name a-a couple.

'''Chris:''' Oh I just uh- okay yeah, I can remember another one. Mmm. [[wikipedia:Hard Boiled|Hard Boiled]]. I got the collector's edition version of [[wikipedia:Stranglehold (video game)|Stranglehold]] Playstation 3. That was...

'''Troll:''' Hey, Hard Boiled? Wasn't that a John Woo movie with Chao Yung Fat?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' And he's like, 'Oh man, I love that one!' and he's- and he's got, and he has a gunfight in the hospital- that's a really good one.

'''Chris:''' And I saw [[wikipedia:Kill Bill|Kill Bills volume I and II]].

'''Troll:''' Oh those are pretty impressive! [pause] Also, um. Have you ever heard about the new [[wikipedia:Dragonball Evolution|Dragonball movie]] that's about to come out... in two months?

'''Chris:''' Mmm. No, uh, ye- no- ye- no I haven't. But I have heard- but I have, uh watched a bunch of Dragonball episodes. Uhh... [[wikipedia:Dragonball#Anime series|Dragonball, Dragonball Z, 'n Dragonball GT]]... and I have seen some of the movies. Oh- a-and I have also seen the orig- the, uh, the [[wikipedia:Street Fighter (film)|Street Fighter Movie]]... a long time ago.

'''Troll:''' Ooooh I remember that one.

'''Chris:''' And I'm also looking forward to the one where they... the [[wikipedia:Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li|new Street Fighter movie]] that's coming out that's gonna be be [[Chris and English|surrounding]] [[wikipedia:Chun-Li|Chun-Li]].

[The trolls talk over each other at this point]

'''Troll:''' Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

'''Troll:''' Did you play [[wikipedia:Street Fighter IV|Street Fighter IV?]]

'''Troll:''' Ooh, Chun-Li was my favorite Street Fighter character... actually.

'''Chris:''' Me too.

[Julie and a troll talk over each other]

'''Julie:''' Oh wait-

'''Troll:''' -reet Fighter IV?

'''Julie:''' Yeah. [''pause''] Cuz Chris, I'm gonna get it and I wanna play against you...

'''Chris:''' What, Street Fighter IV?

'''Julie:''' Yeah!

'''Chris:''' Yeah I was thinking about- yeah I-I was thinking about getting the collector's edition version... of that.

'''Julie:''' Mmm.

[The generic sound of junk being moved around in the background; a slight pause]

'''Julie:''' Chris, who's your favorite person to use in Street Fighter, like who do you use the most?

'''Chris:''' [[wikipedia:Chun-Li|Chun-Li]].

'''Julie:''' I also use [[wikipedia:Dan Hibiki|Dan]].

'''Troll:''' I use [[wikipedia:Cammy|Cammy]].

'''Chris:''' In [[Soul Calibur]] I use [[wikipedia:List of characters in the Soul series#Cassandra|Cassandra]].

[''pause'']

'''Troll:''' Oh. What a coincidence, I actually use Cassandra a lot...um in um, Soul Calibur.

'''Troll:''' I play Cervantes. I like play Cervantes... a lot.

'''Chris:''' You don't saaaaaay. Hmm. [Chris's voice rises and falls in an incredibly homosexual manner, like the words of an uptight British gentleman being informed his [[duck]] is remarkable both in length and girth]

==== Broken [[duck|Wii]], More Games ====

'''Troll:''' Hey Chris, I've got a question.

'''Chris:''' [[Megatron Gun|Shoot]].

'''Troll:''' Uhh- two days ago my Wii broke and I have to send it in for repairs, and it's not gonna be back for like two weeks... what should-- what do you think I should do to fill that time slot until I get it back?

'''Chris:''' Umm... do what you're normally doing right now- like as if uhh... you're living- I mean, you're pretty much living with that right now, just continue on with that... until uhh... you get it back.

'''Troll:''' Thanks Chris, that's great advice.

[The troll is very sarcastic. Chris [[autism|doesn't notice.]] ]

'''Chris:''' Simple, really! Not [[tobacky|rocket]] scEYEnce[sic].

[''pause'']

'''Troll:''' You play any other [[CWCFighter|fighting games]]... or have any other fighting games?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I just mentioned S-Soul Calibur, just the Street Fighter, [inaudible]... I-I also played Tekken.

'''Troll:''' Anything else?

'''Troll:''' I played that.

'''Chris:''' And-and a little bit of Mortal Kombat.

'''Troll:''' Oh. Have you ever played, uh. You had a Dreamcast before, right? Or do you still have one?

'''Chris:''' Yeah I still have my Dreamcast.

'''Troll:''' You ever played Powerstorm?

'''Chris:''' Yeah I've- I've played a demo of Powerstorm. Powerstone.

'''Troll:''' Oh yeah. Playing into that thing, uh- on your Dreamcast, did you ever play Phantasy Star Online?

'''Chris:''' No.

==== Anime, more games ====

'''Julie:''' Aaa- Chris, can I ask you a question?

'''Chris:''' Sure.

'''Julie:''' What do you think of the Mother series?

'''Chris:''' ... mmm. Y- Oh yeah- you told me about your favorite song from there... uhh- I don't know much ab- I don't know- I do not know much about it, so...

'''Troll:''' Uhh- It's also known as Earthbound when it came out on-

'''Chris:''' Oh yeah, oh yeah, Earthbound, oh yeah,um, I mean I've heard- I may have heard about Earthbound... oh yeah, that's right. I remember hearing that its Japanese name was Mother. ... or it was also known as MOTH-A.

[a stunned, confused silence settles over the trolls. Presumably there is an audio cut here.]

'''Chris:''' [pause] Mmmmm. [''pause''] Uhh... uhh, I don't think so.

[''pause'']

'''Julie:''' You should play Phantasy Star Online.

'''Hamsty:''' What about Freerealms?

'''Troll:''' Yeah the whole... the whole... fanchat was playing Phantasy Star Online for the past few days, it was fun.

[The sound of some kind of tapping can be heard in the background; presumably this is Chris because there is a pause and he doesn't speak until the tapping stops.]

[Chris and Julie talk over each other, along with a burst of static]

'''Julie:''' -lay with us.

'''Chris:''' Uh. I might consider that. [Chris doesn't sound sincere]

'''Troll:''' I mean, we could show you how to get set up and everything.

'''Chris:''' Uhh- I don't- yeah well, I don't, I mean- uhh... Not tonight. [''pause''] But I'll consider it.

'''Julie:''' Okay-

'''Troll:''' Oh, also, also, um, [Julie begins to talk over the troll] reading to the left-

'''Julie:''' I mean, Jaggy, [Julie is very unclear here] Sorry could you let someone else, everyone Jaggy, I didn't mean to hurry up- I mean, Chris, you can actually be Sonic in it! It's awesome!

'''Troll:''' Yeah actually I'm playing as Tails!

[more clicking]

'''Chris:''' [[Sammy|Duuhokay]]!

[''pause'']

==== Music and [[Computers]] ====

'''Troll:''' What do you think of the Beatles?

[audio cut]

'''Chris:''' It's, uh, just an HP Pavilion.

'''Julie:''' What Operating System do you have, W-Windows XP?

'''Chris:''' Yeah. [''pause''] Windosse [sic] XP.

'''Julie:''' How much [[Random Access Humor|RAM]] do you have?

'''Chris:''' Mmm. I don't know how much RA- how much total... RAM I have, but uh... yeah... I've pretty much got my... got my memory capacity- fill it up with like... tracks from iTunes, [[sex tape|some videos]], and, uh, [[rule 34|images]].

[[computers|Chris stupidly confuses the volatile Random Access Memory (or RAM) in a computer with permanent hard drive storage.]] [This is from someone who, according to what he told Kacey's father in the [[Father Call]], "...took a computer upgrading class where [he] put together a computer, a personal computer, from scratch." To make an elementary, basic mistake like this is much like a car mechanic mistaking the spare tire for the steering wheel. Even [[BlueSpike|Julie]], a thirteen year old boy without an IT background, knew the difference. Honor roll my arse.]

[stunned silence]

[audio cut]

'''Chris:''' Ohh. Ohh. CPU Speed...

'''Troll:''' Like, your- your hard disk space... is for gigabytes and stuff.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Well. I don't know what my- [stress sigh]

[audio cut; volume is very muted and quiet when it comes back]

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah... 'bout random access memory.

'''Troll:''' Also, um, Hamsty said, um, what-what do you think of the Beatles? [the troll has a noticeable echo]

'''Chris:''' Uhh, they're okay. I- [''pause''] I mean, [static] I mean, I've heard the Beatles, but it's not like I've formed a total... full opinion of them. But you know, they're okay.

'''Troll:''' Oh, okay.

[pause; the sound of shit getting moved around and occasional quiet muttering is present in the background for almost twenty seconds here]

==== Identifying a Homo ====

'''Troll:''' Uhh, Chris?

'''Chris:''' Yeah?

'''Troll:''' You know that [[homo|friend]] that uh- you told me to get rid of? He sent me an e-mail... and he's saying uh- wait let me read it. This e-mail says, uh... 'Dude, I'm not gay, your room is so small and there's nowhere to sit; 'course I sat next to you, how else- I mean, w-what else was I supposed to do?' Lemme skim over it... and then, at the end here, he says, uh, 'Dude, get it through your fucking head as much as you possibly can; I AM STRAIGHT." What am I supposed to say to him? Is he- is he gay or what?

[The occasional sound of typing was heard while the troll was talking; Chris obviously wasn't paying any attention and has, almost certainly, [[Chris and his Ego|completely forgotten about an event which didn't directly concern him]] ]

'''Chris:''' I- I'm sorry could you-, I'm sorry, so, he-he-he... he said that he was... straight?

'''Troll:''' Yeah, he's telling me that he only sat next to me because my room was so small.

'''Chris:''' Hmm. [Chris has obviously forgotten]

'''Troll:''' You know, the friend that thought I was gay?

'''Chris:''' Oh yeah! Hmm. [''long pause''] Mmm.

'''Troll:''' I think he's lying, I think he's gay.

'''Chris:''' Mmm. [Chris's voice rises to a [[speech impediment|high pitched squeak]], outshining even Julie] Well there is one thing... y-y-there is a, uh... test you could figure out... uhh... you could fill out- uhh... do you have any [[Sailor moon poster|posters]] in your room?

'''Troll:''' Uhh... wait, my room?

[It sounds like Chris is [[obesity|eating something]] in the background, possibly with a wrapper. It's a little disgusting.]

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Where y'all would... hang out.

'''Troll:''' Not really.

'''Chris:''' Mmm. Okay, well, uh... fill half the- fill half your-, cover half of your room with- [the troll talks over Chris] with- with-

'''Troll:''' Oh you-you mean like a [[Sailor Moon]] poster? Yeah, I have one of those.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, uh, lemme- [Chris sounds annoyed] let me finish. Cover half of your room with pic-uh, with posters of [[china|women]]. Half of your room with posters of women. You know, c- you know, could be [[anime]], bikini's, oooor... posters you pull out from a [[Playboy]].

[''pause'']

'''Troll:''' Oh, I-I have those, yeah.

'''Chris:''' And then uh, on the other half of your room fill them up with, uh... posters of... [[homos|guys]]. [''pause''] And like uh, you know you could- [the troll interrupts]

'''Troll:''' I-I-I don't know about that man, I'm not gay.

'''Chris:''' I know, but you know you don't have to put- you don't have to... put them in, like, you know, their [[Dirty, Crapped Briefs|underwear]], but you could use like war hero posters like, uh, like a Call of Duty 4... poster. Something like that.

'''Troll:''' Oh yeah.

'''Chris:''' Yeah but anyway, uh-

'''Troll:''' But uh, Call of Duty's not gay!

'''Chris:''' [''pause''] I know but, you know... [''pause''] yeah. But anyway uh, just go half your room in women posters and the other half of your room with uh... guy posters but uh- and then see which uh- which side of the room he leans towards. More.

'''Troll:''' But what if he really likes Call of Duty? Does that mean he's gay? Urggh...

'''Chris:''' Maybe you could cover up the... title of the game if you wanted to, or uh j- or just like, fold it over. You know, just move the game title- but just like, you know, make sure you have the guy- just y'know. Just having the guy there and then... you know-

'''Troll:''' But it's a guy shooting stuff. That's awesome.

'''Chris:''' Yeah but to a h- a but to- when you think about it... if you, uh, think about it, like if you were trying to get into the mind of a... homo... person...? He would see that as something different. [''pause''] But anyway uhh-

'''Troll:''' Uhh- I think it's awesome, like... pictures of a guy like, in army gear and shit, like, and shooting people-

[pause]

'''Chris:''' Yeah but- yeah but, uh, anyway, yeah, it just depends on his point of view and his perspective- but anyway, point is: [[Silvana|half women, half guys]], see which uh, side of the room he looks more towards. Or... leans towards. Or goes to.

'''Troll:''' Okay, I'll keep that in mind.

'''Chris:''' A'right.

'''Troll:''' Yeah but I-I I liked Call of Duty, and like- posters of guys, like shooting s-things- I mean, I have a Contra 4 poster in my room, does that mean I'm- I'm gay?

'''Chris:''' Uhh... no. I'm just uh-

'''Troll:''' Okay cool.

'''Chris:''' Yeah but like you know if you were to like uh, decorate your room, you would probably- you would likely put up more... posters of women than- posters- than have posters of... guys. W- So uh, when you think about that, uh yeah, that let's you- that reminds you that you're definitely straight if you put up more- up more posters of uh, women that's a good sign that you're straight. I have mo- I have more posters of women in my room.

==== Chris... I Wanna Take You To A Gay Bar ====

'''Julie:''' Hey Chris?

'''Chris:''' Yeah?

'''Julie:''' Can I ask you something?

'''Chris:''' Sure.

'''Julie:''' What is so wrong with homos? I mean, I-I know that you don't exactly like them, but... what's wrong with having just a few... homosexual buddies? They're not gonna... you know. They're, you know... good people. You should give 'em- you should give at least one a chance. You should- [Chris interrupts]

'''Chris:''' Uh yeah, but uh yeah, but yeah... see uh, you know I'm going to... associate, and uh... and n-now I to respect them, but it's just like, you know- I don't want to get- I don't want to be... too close.

'''Julie:''' No, but you see it's- the thing is- they won't go near a straight man...! They can tell that you're straight! Don't worry, if you just give one a chance and try to be friends with them, maybe play some more... play some [[Guitar Hero]]... maybe play some [[Little Big Planet]]... have some [[hanky panky|fun]], not try and- just don't... just- just try to have fun with them. Just try for me. Can you please do that? Just try for me?

'''Chris:''' Well, that depends if I ever... meet one.

'''Julie:''' Can you go to like... a social place?

'''Chris:''' Uhhm... well.

'''Julie:''' A-A dance club! What about... what about like a straight- like, an everything dance club...do you know what I mean?

'''Chris:''' Mmm... yeah, mmm... I tell you what. I might go to a dance club... uhh, after you- after you get here so that [[virgin with rage|I don't have to feel alone]].

'''Julie:''' A'right.

'''Chris:''' Okay. [He sounds relieved that this particular conversation thread is mostly over]

'''Brit-Troll:''' I have a question.

[''pause'']

'''Chris:''' M'kay.

==== The Medallion ====

'''Brit-Troll:''' Okay um, since I don't want to keep talking about gay men since that's not my thing, anyways this is about your medallion quest. Okay, uhh, anyways- anyways- what are the uh, the origins of your [[Medallion|medallion]], like when did you make it, is there any particular reason you wear it *all the time*, if you do, and if this is in any way related to your [[love quest]]? [''pause''] Yes, that's what I'm wondering as well.

'''Chris:''' [[Autism|I made it because I wanted to.]]

[''pause'']

'''Julie:''' But-

'''Chris:''' Plus, plus, me wearing it all the time is like me wearing a name-tag but it's not like it has my... name... on the front.

'''Julie:''' Yes, but Chris he was asking why- WHY did you want to, is the question? [''pause''] You must have some motivation.

'''Chris:''' I didn't really have- I don't think I really have any motivation... as far as I can- as far as I can remember. Because that was, like, years ago.

'''Brit-Troll:''' Um like w-when exactly though Chris? Was this in, um, in [[2000]] when you first made Sonichu, or when you uhh- first made the comics in, uh, I believe [[2004]]?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, around 2004 or... [[2003]] I started drawing comics.

'''Brit-Troll:''' W-Was that when you um... first made the medallion though? Cuz we've- we've seen you-

'''Chris:''' Yeah- I don't... I don't remember *when* I made the medal...?

'''Brit-Troll:''' Oh, okay.

'''Chris:''' B-But-bu-bu-[stammers incoherently] but it definitely like- it definitely would have been like before I started drawing any comics.

'''Brit-Troll:''' Yes, yes.

[''pause'']

'''Julie:''' Oh Chris, I have another question for you!

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Julie:''' Two actually uhm, one... do you think you could make me a cool medallion like yours... when I get there?

'''Chris:''' I *might*.

'''Julie:''' Awesome. [''pause''] And uh, the other question- w-what happened to the [[Sonichu Girls]]?

'''Chris:''' Oh. I'm still talk- you know I st-still talk to [[Sarah May]], but uh... I just haven't been there much since, uh... since... [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]] or troll or whatever... hacked into my... Sonichu Girls account.

'''Julie:''' Ahh, I see. Wait- someone hacked into your Sonichu Girls account? That's awful!

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Julie:''' I can't believe some [[JERK]] would do that- that makes me so mad!

[pause]

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

[pause]

==== Friends with Men ====

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Sarah... Sarah May... you can hear me on there, uh... you know you can hit me... set that back up. Whenever you can.

'''Troll:''' Mmm hey I was just wondering, uh- you know [[Robert Simmons V|Robert Simmons]]... is he your friend or what? I heard you know- you don't like to be friends with guys, but... is he like a exception or what?

'''Chris:''' Mmm? Mmm- no, no.

[''pause'']

'''Troll:''' But he seems like really good friends with you though.

'''Julie:''' So we can, like, hate him or...?

'''Chris:''' No, no... I don't... hate him. Uhh... yeah, it's- he's more of a buddy.

'''Troll:''' So... he's like the only buddy as far as like guys go... right?

'''Chris:''' I've had uhh... a few buddies in my lifetime.

'''Troll:''' Oooh, I thought you like hated guys or something... or-or didn't feel comfortable around them. Or something.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, it's a combination.

'''Troll:''' Yeah but what about [[bob|Robert]]? I me-that's very interesting...

'''Chris:''' Wa-wa-wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Okay. Okay. It's not necessarily th- it is NOT that I hate g- hate all men... I just the ones that are- that have- that are really... jerks, which that'll be the majority of the male population.

[The trolls talk over each other for nearly 30 seconds here, with occasional breaks]

'''Troll:''' Isn't that sexist Chris?

[''pause'']

'''Troll:''' That's- that's... yeah That's kinda- that's kinda rough, Chris. It'd be kinda mean if someone said you liked- if [inaudible] fuck most 90% of all the population of something...

'''Troll:''' Very, very insensitive...

'''Troll:''' ... would die, or something...

'''Troll:''' ... not nice...

'''Troll:''' ... I mean, who-who would say that?

'''Chris:''' I have known a lot of jerks in my lifetime.

'''Troll:''' I mean, uh, I confess, we all have.

'''Troll:''' Yeah but how far have you really traveled to see that Ch-Chris have- like, you know, there's so many other places in the world that- where men can actually be nice.

'''Troll:''' I mean, but not nice in the [[It's UGH!|gay way]].

[The trolls finally stop talking over each other]

'''Chris:''' [MASSIVE stress sigh] Yeah I... don't know how to answer those questions cuz... I never traveled around the world. This far-The farthest I've ever traveled was to California on airplane... [[Cole Smithy|to visit my half-]]

'''Troll:''' [inaudible] -a neat place!

[the trolls talk over each other again]

'''Julie:''' Chris, you should go on a road trip.

'''Troll:''' Chris!

'''Troll:''' The world's a pretty good guy, eh?

[''pause'']

'''Chris:''' Yeah well-

'''Troll:''' I mean, I can understand... like, a jerk move would be like... say, you're a friend with some lady and then some guy comes and takes her away from you, like, even though he knows you're in a relationship with her, but, like, if-if like, y-you've never ever known these people before, I mean how is it more of a- h-how does it really make them a jerk if you've never really met them and they didn't even know you or... you know, haven't had the chance yet.

'''Chris:''' Ummm... not really sure.

[pause; soft beep in the background]

'''Troll:''' Oh.

==== On The Trans-gender Community ====

'''Cameron:''' Hmm. Oh, Chris- I. I have a question for you. Uhm... I recall asking you once, like a few... chats ago... if you ever thought about being a cyborg and-... you said no... but you thought about being a girl, and, you know, you went on... signed a package God gave you. But theeen, towards the end, you said that um, transgender people... male to female to be specific- uh, you suggested that they should... actually go ahead and have the surgery... um, since they're taking the hormones and I'm just wondering... some trans-women don't *really* have a problem with that area, I'm just- curious why you would suggest that.

'''Chris:''' Ok what- okay what you're saying... it's not what- it's not what I sugge- I-I-I never said anything like, uh, anything about the trans-gender people, or... taking a- or taking any surgery or what like that. You might- you might be uh, be confusing that to, uh, to where, to where I said that... I'd sooner change my gender b- then, before I- before I became a homo.

[It's obvious that Chris either forgot or chooses to forget when he said this statement; unfortunately, that part of the chat is part of a previous mumble which hasn't been completely transcribed. At least, BlueSpike and Cameron are quite convinced it occurred; if anyone knows where Chris said that, feel free to link it in.]

[sound of typing in the background]

'''Julie:''' Actually Chris, um... Cameron's right- I think you did say that.

'''Chris:''' Hmm, I don't remember.

[''pause'']

'''Cameron:''' Yeah we- we have a [[CWCki|record]], 'n... I just remember that.

'''Cameron:''' Yeah, I mean, what do you think of [[Lovely Weather|trans-women]] in general? I mean- I know they're not sweetheart material, but... in general. Like, should they... go under the knife?

'''Chris:''' Um... [''long pause''] no. I- no no. And also I'll tell you- i'll tell you this- and if I ever have a trans-gender child with both sets of, uh- with both sets of uh... genitals... I would uh, raise that child to be a boy.

'''Cameron:''' Reeeally. Well, f-first [sound of Windows beeping] of all, um, uhh, both sets or something like that is actually called inter-sexed- and it c-

[audio cut]

'''Cameron:''' And uh... yeah, that's an old archaic term, Gecko-

'''Troll:''' I was wondering, uh-

'''Cameron:''' Oh go ahead, Falsion-

'''Chris:''' W-well either, well either way, transgender or hermaphrodite I'd raise them as a male.

'''Falsion:''' I mean-

'''Cameron:''' Chris-

'''Falsion:''' -when the child was born, couldn't you just like get an operation to have one set removed?

'''Cameron:''' I think it should be up to the child's choice eventually, I mean that does-

'''Chris:''' Yeah-

'''Falsion:''' Hold on, lemme talk for a second.

'''Cameron:''' Okay, go Falsion.

'''Falsion:''' Uhh... Chris, like, say if you were dating a girl... and it turned out [[Julie|she]] [[Sarah May|actually]] [[Vanessa Hudgens|had]] [[PandaHalo|a]] [[Blanca|penis]], what would you do? Cuz' I had- I had that happen to me once.

'''Chris:''' Mmm. [''pause''] I'd [[Chris Loses It|freak out]] and probably throw up.

[''pause'']

'''Cameron:''' Wait, you would throw up because-

'''Falsion:''' Yeah, me too, I-

'''Cameron:''' -your son was... trans-gender?

'''Chris:''' What? No no no no no no... I meant, if I was dating a [[troll|woman]], and I thought she was truly woman [sic], but then I found out she was a hermaphrodite or a trans-gender... then-

'''Cameron:''' But- but... but yoooou... said that you... support their decisions to do that... why would you... why would you like, you know-

'''Troll:''' Freak out.

'''Cameron:''' Freak out about it.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh; pause''] Uhhh...

'''Julie:''' Yeah c'mon, people can do that operation thing, they don't- they- they feel kind of... well, people feel kinda picked on when they just don't get dates because of [[pickle|that]]. [''pause''] And it makes people feel bad, Chris, it kind of does.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh; pause''] Uhgh. I'm sorry, it's... mmm.

'''Julie:''' It's- it's okay.

==== A Wild [[Chandler Cats|Kitty]] Appears! ====

[''pause'']

[''Four soft beeps; the first two and last are identical, the third appears to be a Skype noise. Horrific, tortured yowling can be heard.'']

'''Chris:''' Hi there sweety.

[''More beeps, more pained yowling'']

'''Chris:''' Excuse me. It's my cat. Excuse me. Hi sweety, what do you want? Are you hungry? Come on, i'll give you some food.

'''Julie:''' Can I talk to the kitty?

[''Sound like a large avalanche of junk'']

[''Even more pained yowling. That cat probably hasn't been fed in a couple of days or more.'']

[''pause'']

'''Chris:''' Hi Lucy! There you go.

[''Hamsty giggles in the background, The general drift is 'it's okay, go on'.'']

'''Julie:''' Chris?

[''pause'']

'''Julie:''' Did [''inaudible''] log out?

'''Chris:''' I was talking to my cats.

'''Julie:''' Oh, okay.

'''Troll:''' What kind of cats do you have?

[''pause'']

[''sound of typing'']

'''Julie:''' Kitty!

==== Return Of The Dickgirls ====

'''Falsion:''' So uh, about the things we were saying before; if you found out, like, you know, would you still love that person?

'''Chris:''' Umm... [''pause''] uhh. If I f-

'''Falsion:''' Like, if you had feelings for...

'''Chris:''' Umm... [''longer pause''] mmm. Hey [[Snorlax|Mum]], whatcha up to?

'''Chris:''' [''faint''] Oh, okay...

[''sound of mountains of junk, trash and rubbish being shuffled around'']

'''Snorlax:''' [''faint''] Somebody poop?

'''Chris:''' [''faint''] Yeeeah... Kitty did it already, I cleaned it up.

[''possibly someone muttering in the background'']

'''Chris:''' [''faint''] I did.

[''pause, moving of junk'']

'''Chris:''' Mmm. Right, so what was the question?

'''Julie:''' Wait, is that your mother? Can I talk to her?

'''Chris:''' Mmm, no she just left.

[''Julie, Falsion and Cameron talk over each other'']

'''Julie:''' Aww, okay.

'''Falsion:''' Yeah Cogs said that- pretty much said it.

'''Cameron:''' Yeah, to your left.

[''End talking over each other'']

'''Chris:''' Yeah so, what was the question?

'''Falsion:''' Like... if you loved someone- I mean, a girl and it turned out that [[Silvana|she had a penis]], would you still love her?

'''Chris:''' Ooooh yeah. Uhh, mmm. No, I'd pre- no, I'd pretty much uh... break it off, but you know-

'''Falsion:''' Not even friends?

'''Cameron:''' Yeah, not even friends...?

'''Chris:''' I mean but uh, yeah but I mean, uh, yeah, I- I mean break up... relationship and go back to being [[friend zone|just friends]].

[''pause'']

'''Falsion:''' Okay.

'''Cameron:''' Oooh, okay.

'''Julie:''' But Chris, looks don't always matter, shouldn't it be the [[BlueSpike|person itself]]? I mean-

'''Cameron:''' Really, yeah!

'''Julie:''' I mean, not, not what's on the outside but what's on the insi-

'''Chris:''' [''talks over Julie'']- I-I said I'd still be friends with that person. [''Windows beeping'']

'''Julie:''' Yes well- yes, but why would you still break with them just 'cuz of that?

'''Chris:''' I don't mean- I meant... I meant, I meant, [[death threats|kill them]]- I meant, still be friends but... not be [[rule 34|romantic]].

[''pause'']

'''Cameron:''' Hmm.

[''pause'']

'''Falsion:''' Also, I was wondering, um- I watch a lot of television and I was wondering um- do you watch professional wrestling? I love it, my father loves it, and um-

'''Chris:''' Uhhhh... no, not- no, I don't watch it often. No.

'''Falsion:''' Oh, like, you don't watch WWE or um... the Ultimate Fighting Championship?

'''Chris:''' Yeah I don't.

'''Falsion:''' Oh, okay.

'''Chris:''' It just never really- it just never really interested me.

==== Cartoon Heroes, Audio Volume Fail ====

[''The audio becomes extremely muted here'']

'''Falsion:''' [''very faint''] Oh, okay.

[''pause, sound of mouse clicks and typing in the background'']

'''Falsion:''' [''very faint''] Also uhh, can you tell us, what's your favorite cartoon character?

'''Chris:''' [''very faint''] Uhh... who wants to know about it?

'''Falsion:''' [''very faint''] Me and [''inaudible'']

'''Chris:''' [''very faint''] Yeah well, when I heard, uh, it would be [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] I mean, you know but before him, I would say my hero would be [[The American Rabbit]].

'''Falsion:''' [''very faint''] Oh, that's great.

[''Several trolls talk at once; due to the extreme quietness of the audio it is inaudible'']

'''Falsion:''' [''very faint''] -I mean, wait. Does that mean Sonic qualifies as like [''inaudible''] considering like you show... or, like, [''inaudible'']

'''Chris:''' [''very faint''] I consider it the number one in most ways.

'''Falsion:''' [''very faint''] Yes but uh- that qualifies as a cartoon character if it's a video game... character.

'''Cameron:''' [''very faint''] Yes but he was also in a cartoon though, he had uh [''inaudible'']

'''Falsion:''' [''very faint''] I remember that too like, like, when I was a little kid [[wikipedia:The Adventures of Sonic The Hedgehog|The Adventures of Sonic The Hedgehog]]- that's a fun show.

'''Cameron:''' [''very faint''] Yeah. [''inaudible''] Um Chris, which show did you like- did you like the one with uh, like the one which was on Saturday mornings, or... did you like the one with uh, with the [''inaudible'']

[''Transcriber's note: Warning to listeners who may have their volume cranked to hear: the next speaker, presumably the person recording the conversation, has their volume at a normal level.'']

'''Troll:''' [''LOUD''] They were all [[wikipedia:Jaleel_White|Steve Urkel]] as Sonic.

[''Jaleel White, most famous for his role as Steve Urkel on the 1990s sitcom Family Matters, also voiced the character of Sonic the Hedgehog and other characters for Sonic the Hedgehog media.'']

[''Chris's next reply is muted and quiet again'']

'''Chris:''' [''very faint''] Yeah, th- [''inaudible'']

==== Cartoon Heroes, Audio Volume Restored ====

[''From this point on, the audio is back to normal'']

'''Troll:''' [''LOUD''] D-did ya' like the one that had Sally, and-

[''Chris and the troll talk over each other'']

'''Chris:''' -Yeah, I liked the-

'''Troll:''' -Bonny, and other characters?

'''Chris:''' -Yeah- Yeah- I liked the [[wikipedia:Sonic_the_Hedgehog_(TV_series)|Saturday Morning]] better than the... [[wikipedia:Adventures_of_Sonic_the_Hedgehog|weekday]].

[''Transcriber's note: There were two Sonic the Hedgehog cartoons showing at the time Chris was a kid. One was a shitty weekday serial which was basically slapstick comedy and [[random access humor]] while the other was a much more serious show. Surprisingly, Chris favored the serious show.'']

'''Falsion:''' I absolutely agree.

'''Troll:''' Yeah, that was a much better one.

'''Falsion:''' Yeah. It was on, um- I think it was called like... the first one was The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, the second was Saturn... then there was [[wikipedia:Sonic_Underground|Sonic Underground]]-

[''Transcriber's note: I could find no record of 'Sonic Saturn'.'']

'''Chris:''' -Yeah.

'''Falsion:''' -then there was [[wikipedia:Sonic_X|Sonic X]].

==== Chris' Life as a Soap Opera ====

'''Troll:''' Here's a question, what's your favorite soap opera?

'''Cameron:''' Yeah, d-do you watch them?

'''Chris:''' Yeah I watch soap opera- yeah, I've watched soap operas... I'd say, I've watched more- I've watched most often [[wikipedia:The_Young_and_the_Restless|The Young and the Restless]].

'''Cameron:''' OooOOOOoooh.

'''Chris:''' A-And then- and then I also- [''Windows beeping''] during my teenage years I also watched [[wikipedia:Undressed|MTV's Undressed]].

'''Cameron:''' Hmm.

'''Falsion:''' I'm watching a soap opera.

'''Cameron:''' Yeah. Uhh, Chris- do you sometimes ever get the feeling that your life is kinda... a soap opera?

'''Chris:''' [''sounding annoyed''] Yees. Yes.

'''Cameron:''' Mmm. How so?

'''Chris:''' Just feels that- it just feels that way.

'''Cameron:''' Mmm. The only thing-

'''Chris:''' You know, I get- I get a lot of [[trolls|drama]] in my lifetime.

'''Cameron:''' Ahh. Do you- do you think that making your videos just... feeds into that a bit more?

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] A lot of things have been... [[obesity|fed]]... to my... lifetime.

'''Cameron:''' Ohh, really?

'''Chris:''' So it's like... well. A lot. A lot of stuff. Like, yeah.

'''Falsion:''' Yeah, you gotta keep doing what you do, you know, don't let the anyone get you down or anything.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Falsion:''' Just... just like, the end of a [[Asperchu|very good story]], like, everybody's life has a happy ending. The heroes. It's like a very good story.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

[''The trolls talk over each other'']

'''Cameron:''' Ooooh, hans-

'''Cameron:''' Ohh, really?

'''Falsion:''' Oh yeah- yeah- Hans here had a question here. He said- I he- I heard you're going to make a Chris Chandler show.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh; Chris sounds annoyed''] That has- that has not been decided fully yet. Uhh, [[Vivian]] suggested it.

[''The trolls talk over each other'']

'''Julie:''' I think it's a great idea!

'''Various Trolls:''' Yeah! Yeah!

'''Cameron:''' I would watch it.

'''Falsion:''' Oh. Like, if you did do that, would you do it on like a weekly basis or-

'''Chris:''' Yeah- yeah I'd say more of a-

'''Falsion:''' -like a daily, or like a monthly-

'''Chris:''' -I'd say more- I'd say more a weekly.

'''Troll:''' I'd watch it every time, I mean...

'''Falsion:''' How long would each show be?

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] I- obviously ten minutes, I mean, there's uh- that's a limit.

'''Falsion:''' Well you could divide it- [''Various trolls interject, Falsion shouts over them''] DIVIDE it into parts?

'''Julie:''' Yeah you should make it like half an hour, e-every week.

'''Chris:''' Uhgh...

'''Falsion:''' Like Sonic Saturn.

'''Chris:''' Yeah- I don't know. Uhh, that's for me to decide... eventually.

==== A Terrible Idea is Born====

'''Troll:''' Also like The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog you could- you should add a segment for the [[Zapina|children]], like, you know, like, "Ask Chris" or "Chris Says"-

[''Trolls talk over each other here, the general drift is to suggest names for the title.'']

'''Falsion:''' Yeah like telling peo- telling kids not to do drugs and stuff like that.

'''Troll:''' [''static-y''] [[Megan|Sexual]] [[The Wallflower|harassment]] and all that.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Falsion:''' Plus, will- [''audio cut'']

==== Rosechu-porn ====

'''Chris:''' Yeah. [''pause''] Yeah.

'''Julie:''' Just make an [[Sonichu_and_Rosechu's_Luv_Shack|eighteen-or-over section]] so we can all see the... comics-

'''Chris:''' [''talks over Julie''] Yeah I'll- I'll-

'''Julie:''' I'd love it.

'''Chris:''' Yeah I'll eventually make one of those, I just haven't gotten around to it yet.

[''Various trolls interject and try to talk, but Falsion wins'']

'''Falsion:''' -Chris. [''pause''] Yeah you know Chris, I heard something about a uh... [[homo|poke'boy]] magazine I reckon that'd be pretty cool to release, you know. With the uh- with the uh... photos, and pinups of the-of all the Sonichu... uhh- the Rosechu girls. That uh, that I think'd- [''Chris talks over Falsion''] it'd be kind of fun.

'''Chris:''' [''annoyed''] Yeah well for your information it's two syllables, Rose-Chu, not Rose-a-chu it's...

'''Falsion:''' Oh, okay. It's uh- it's uh-

'''Chris:''' [''quietly''] It's okay.

'''Falsion:''' It's west coast dialect.

==== Chris and Sonic Games ====

'''Cameron:''' I'm not sure if it's been asked before Chris, but do you prefer the 2D Sonic games or the 3D ones? Cuz' I like- I like the ones on the Genesis the best...

'''Chris:''' Mmm. [''pause''] Ahh. [''pause''] Mmm. I think I like 3D better.

'''Falsion:''' Hmm. [''pause''] In my opinion Sonic 3D was the best.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Cameron:''' Oh, that one was pretty awesome.

'''Troll:''' Definitely.

'''Chris:''' That was the first- that was the first... 3D attempt at putting Sonic in 3D world, [''Chris slurs his words into an indecipherable mess''] anyway.

'''Troll:''' Actually, my favorite one was where you would take-

[''A troll tries to talk over the first, but the first starts again after a brief pause'']

'''Troll:''' My favorite one was where you would take Sonic and Knuckles and a- and latch Sonic 3 onto it, that was a great game.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

==== Back to the Show ====

'''Falsion:''' Also, um. I was wondering. If you were doing the show, would it be scripted or would it be like an improvisation, unscripted format? And would it have commercial... breaks?

'''Chris:''' Urgh... I would probably improvise, and [[Chris and Money|no commercial breaks]].

'''Falsion:''' O...kay.

[''silence'']

'''Cameron:''' Wait, wait. Commercial breaks... don't you understand how TV works?

[''various trolls talk over each other, Cameron wins'']

'''Cameron:''' How do you think they make money?

'''Chris:''' Yeah I know but uh... [''pause'']

'''Julie:''' Yeah you could actually make money!

'''Chris:''' Yeah well I'm not really sure how to do commercials on that note, so... I might just assume, uh...

'''Cameron:''' Or you could do it like [[wikipedia:Jimmy_Kimmel|Jimmy Kimmel]], he does them on his show... live?

'''Falsion:''' You could just do your-

'''Troll:''' -yeah!-

'''Falsion:''' -own multiple cuts, then like, take a break in between them uh- and between like let some stress out, get everything organized-

'''Troll:''' -like the-

'''Falsion:''' -you know.

'''Troll:''' Put an ad commercial there, you in there... insurance [''very unclear''].

'''Troll:''' Or put in like some clips from your [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|DVD]] or something. Or put on songs, or-

[''Chris talks over the troll, but he keeps going.'']

'''Chris:''' Uhh no, I-I- [''stress sigh'']

'''Troll:''' -waiting music, or something like that.

'''Chris:''' I don't know, I'd have to th- I don't [''voice trails off''] know I'd have to... go think about.

'''Troll:''' Okay.

==== Magazines ====

'''Cameron:''' Oh Chris, um- you remember a troll by the name of, uh, hottie96 on YouTube?

'''Chris:''' Uhh... no I don't.

'''Cameron:''' Oh well you don't? Oh, okay. Well, she [''static''] posted a video... of someone who... sent you... um, [[niggo|African-American]] magazines.

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Cameron:''' Yeah. Uhh, someone... put-[''static''] uhh, subscribed you- to your subscription for Jet, Essence, and uh-... Vibe. And I was wondering-

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Cameron:''' -if those actually ever showed up.

'''Chris:''' Mmm. [''pause''] None of them showed up.

'''Cameron:''' None of them? Oh, okay.

'''Troll:''' Ok good, because you know-

==== Daily Routine ====

'''Troll:''' Actually, I have a question.

[''pause'']

[''audio cut; the question is lost. Presumably, based on Chris' answer, it was about his daily routine.'']

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh; pause''] Yeah, it's- it varies, uh... you know, one day I'll be doing one thing, then next day I'll be doing something else, then some days I have to take a rest. Take- take days off.

'''Troll:''' Y-Yeah, I noticed that. It's like uh... it's like I can never tell like... w-what was it, I forgot what I was going to say.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] It's called a life.

'''Troll:''' Oh, Hamsty is saying... well, what do you do? You don't have a job.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh'']

'''Troll:''' That was Hamsty and not me.

[''pause'']

'''Chris:''' Uhhm... sure. Um... [''pause''] I'm sorry, can you repeat the question?

'''Troll:''' Hamsty is saying that you don't have a job, I mean, so you must have l-like a lot of free time so, you know, what do you do?

[''audio cut'']

'''Cameron:''' -me!

'''Chris:''' Oh. Mmm.

'''Troll:''' That's lucky.

'''Troll:''' Mmm hmm.

'''Troll:''' Yeah. Oh Chris, I have a question related-

'''Troll:''' Wait, let him answer.

'''Troll:''' Yes, I'm sorry.

'''Troll:''' Don't smother him like that.

'''Chris:''' Uhhm... [''pause''] Yeah I can't really describe my uh... daily schedule on a... whim. At the moment. [''soft 'pong!' in the background''] And uh... Yeah I'd rather not say.

'''Chris:''' I get stressed one day and then I have to ta- then I have to recover.

[''murmur of troll agreement'']

'''Troll:''' I understand Chris.

'''Falsion:''' I mean, you seem kinda busy all the time, I mean...

'''Troll:''' And if you're working on things you like all day, and usually that's how you relieve stress, if you get stressed from that- if you do that to relieve stress the next day, then how is that t-taking a day off?

'''Chris:''' Hmm. [''pause''] Uhhm... [''pause''] I don't know. I'm getting ti- these questions uh, I'm feeling uncomfortable with these questions.

==== Chris is Stressed, Moving On ====

'''Troll Chorus:''' Okay.

'''Troll:''' Hamsty has another question though. Since y- [''audio goes extremely quiet here, inaudible'']

[''Presumably, the question was about what Sonichu would sound like.'']

'''Chris:''' Umm... lemme think about that.

'''Troll:''' Yeah, I've always wondered what Sonichu sounded like...

'''Chris:''' Umm... lemme think about that.

[''Pause'']

'''Chris:''' [''Chris uses his 'Sonichu' voice, which is exactly identical to his normal voice, just a little less stressed''] Hey [[Rosechu|Rosey]], I'm gonna go take a swim!

[''shocked pause'']

[''Many trolls join in an approving chorus'']

'''Troll:''' Nice!

'''Troll:''' Yeah that's pretty cool.

[''Many, many voices, too numerous to make out']

'''Troll:''' Really bad-arse.

'''Chris:''' Ok.

'''Troll:''' ... bad, bad, bad...

==== Comics Questions ====

'''Troll:''' So Chris, Chris I had a question- kinda related to the comics. If you could have any, like, major big time company... publish it... uh, who would it be? Like uhh, you know, DC, or Marvel, or someone like that. Would you-

'''Chris:''' uhh-

'''Troll:''' -mind putting it out.

'''Chris:''' -I'd say probably Archie comics.

'''Troll:''' Oh nice, sticking with the classics.

'''Brit-Troll:''' Yeah, they did the uh, Sonic comics.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Cameron:''' Oh uhh, Chris- um. Cogs had a question, I'll read it... um. Are your comics going to feature any lesbian relationships?

'''Chris:''' Uhh... I don't think so.

'''Cameron:''' Oh? How come?
[[Image:Homobad.jpg|thumb|''I'm promoting being straight.'' -- Christian Weston Chandler.]]
'''Chris:''' I'm promoting being straight... for one thing.

'''Cameron:''' Mm hmm!

'''Falsion:''' Ooooh, we thought you were okay with like, lesbians and stuff.

'''Cameron:''' Yeah, wi.

'''Chris:''' Well, I mean... I might, I might not I don't know- it just... it's a f- it's an, uh, future thing so... it's uncertain at the moment.

'''Cameron:''' Mmmmmm...

'''Falsion:''' Ahh. O-One thing, you said you wanted the game to go, like, multi-platform between... Nintendo and like the PlayStation, right?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Falsion:''' Well, what I'm confused about isn't- isn't Pokemon like a trademark of Nintendo? How would that work out? There would be a lot of copyright...

'''Chris:''' [''Chris's voice is shrill and hysterical''] I DON'T KNOW I DON'T KNOW, I'm not a business... genius. I don't know. I'm not a business genius.

'''Falsion:''' I was just asking.

[''pause, loud sound of typing in the background'']

'''Chris:''' Uhhm... yeah, I don't yeah I don't- yeah... it's I-it's only a possibility, just a random- just a random idea I had. It's just like- yeah.

[''pause'']

==== Sailor Moon ====

'''Troll:''' Chris, I've just remembered something. Uhh- I- you're good- you're a pretty- you're a pretty big Sailor Moon fan, weren't there some lesbians in Sailor Moon?

'''Chris:''' [''pause''] You're thinking of... Sailor Neptune and Uranus. [''Chris uses the other pronunciation of Uranus, [[homos#Fear of being a homo|probably to avoid that whole 'Your Anus' thing.]]'']

'''Troll:''' Yeah!

'''Troll:''' Yes.

'''Cameron:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' Yeah, I thought what they had was pretty special, I mean, you could do something like that.

'''Troll:''' Yeah.

'''Chris:''' Yeah I'm not sure about that.

[''pause'']

'''Troll:''' Oh, speaking of Sailor Moon, who's your favorite Sailor Scout?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

[''pause'']

'''Falsion:''' Oh, um, by the way, speaking of Sailor Moon, what's your favorite Sailor Scout- if you don't mind me asking.

'''Chris:''' Sorry, what was the question?

'''Falsion:''' Who is your favorite Sailor Scout, out of the whole group?

'''Troll:''' Sailor Jupiter for me.

'''Chris:''' Mmm.

'''Falsion:''' Mine is, um-

[''Chris and Falsion answer at the same time'']

'''Chris:''' I like Mercury.

'''Falsion:''' -Mercury.

'''Troll:''' Oh yeah, she was hot.

[''The trolls talk over each other'']

'''Troll:''' I liked Chibi-moon.

'''Cameron:''' I liked Sailor Saturn.

'''Troll:''' I haven't got the opportunity to watch that show since it was on-

[''audio cut'']

==== Other Cartoons ====

'''Troll:''' Have you seen [[wikipedia:InuYasha|Inu Yasha]]?

'''Chris:''' Yah.

'''Troll:''' What do you- what did ya' think of it?

'''Chris:''' Good show.

'''Troll:''' Cool, cool. What's your favorite character?

[''pause'']

'''Chris:''' I'd say [[wikipedia:List_of_InuYasha_characters#Protagonists|Kagome]].

'''Troll:''' What about- umm, what's some other stuff on.... you watch Adult Swim, right? Have you seen [[wikipedia:Code_Geass|Code Geese]] [sic]? I think that's what it...

'''Chris:''' [''annoyed''] Code GEASS.

'''Troll:''' Yeah yeah.

'''Chris:''' Yeah I've seen that.

'''Cameron:''' Noodle people!

'''Troll:''' What do you- what do you think of uh, you know uh, you know any characters you like..?

'''Chris:''' Uhh... C- I haven't really gotten into that- gotten really fully into it yet. I mean I watched the bi-

'''Troll:''' -yeah-

'''Chris:''' I mean I started watching it when I... got into Adult Swim because I saw, uh, a Japanese PSP game... that had- that was, uh, had like- had that- those- uh- that was of Code Geass, but uh... and the guy- and the guy- that reminded me of... Kaiba from Yu-Gi-Yo!.

'''Troll:''' Uhh Chris, since I've noticed you like anime and also romantic ones could I recommend like two anime for you, by any chance?

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] ... Yeah, sure.

'''Troll:''' A'right, I've got your Skype right here, so I can... I'll PM- I'll PM you the links even? Like, one's called, '[[wikipedia:Higurashi_no_Naku_Koro_ni|When They Cry]]' and the other's called '[[wikipedia:List_of_School_Days_episodes|School Days]]', which I think you might like most. [''Transcriber's note: Chris is HIGHLY unlikely to enjoy either of these, except for the fact there's a lot of women in them.'']

'''Chris:''' I'll see.

'''Troll:''' Uhrm- Hang on, I'll get you the links. Also-

[''audio cut'']

==== All About Cocks ====

'''Chris:''' -uhh, Super Nintendo and the GameCube. [''pause''] I dunno, for the Super Nintendo I'd like uh... [''pause''] mmm.

[''pause'']

'''Falsion:''' Hey Chris.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Falsion:''' When it comes to Anime, do you like girls who are kind of... more-more of a sweet, you know, kind, soft hearted disposition or do you like them to be [[CWCFighter|strong fighters]]?

'''Chris:''' Mmm. I like both, actually. [''pause''] But I think I'm uh more into the- I think I'm... like, you know, if I could put, you know, [[Silvana|half-half]].

'''Falsion:''' Oh. I see. Um. Also, on Adult Swim, you ever watch an Anime called- um [[wikipedia:Crayon_Shin-chan|Shin Chan]].

'''Chris:''' Oh, Shin-Chan.

'''Falsion:''' Yes.

'''Chris:''' Mmm. Yeah I mean it's uh, it's okay, but I don't care much for uh... the [[nudes|nudie]] parts. I don't care- I don't care much for [[Speech impediment|dem]] [sic].

[''Another troll talks over Cameron, but his voice is more audible'']

'''Cameron:''' Why don't you like the nude parts, you have a problem with the... human body?

[''pause'']

'''Chris:''' Mmm.

[''Cameron and the troll talk over each other'']

'''Falsion:''' I mean you [[Sonichu_8|draw it in your comics]] so you must have plenty to say-

'''Cameron:''' [''singing''] You must have hooonor- honooor honor and a peeeenis...

[''silence'']

'''Chris:''' Mmm. [''pause''] Yeah I don't like look'n- yeah I just don't like looking at- I-I just- dicks offend me.

'''Falsion:''' Oh. I see. Um, ever seen [[wikipedia:Case_Closed|Case Closed]]?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Falsion:''' Uhh. [''pause''] Uhh Chris, remember that one time you drew uhh, [[Sonichu_8|Sonichu with his penis out]]? Were you offended by that or what?

'''Chris:''' I drew it with a condom.

'''Falsion:''' Oh.

'''Chris:''' I- I never drew it-

'''Falsion:''' Oh, with a condom it's okay, right?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Cameron:''' Large difference.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Falsion:''' I- I'm sorry man, I'm sorry.

'''Cameron:''' So... how exactly does Sonichu's penis work? It- it slides out...?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Falsion:''' We went through this in the comic, though... You should read the comic.

[''the trolls shout over each other'']

'''Troll Chorus:''' Yeah!

'''Cameron:''' I still don't understand it, kind of.

'''Falsion:''' You must be illiterate, then.

'''Chris:''' Bueh he-[''sic''] First he has to get stiff, and den [''sic''] he has to lean forward to make it come out. I got the idea from-

'''Cameron:''' I don't really me-

'''Chris:''' -I got the idea from the line where he says [[wikipedia:And_the_Wiener_Is...|"Hey, mine goes inside me when I stand up, how do you think I feel?"]]

[''the trolls talk over each other; all dialog inaudible'']

'''Falsion:''' Yeah, Hamsty had a question.

'''Troll:''' Yes. Hamsty asked, "Are you into poop, Chris? Cuz that's a kink-"

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh'']

'''Troll:''' -Cuz that's kinky, I remember you said you had on... [[dirty, crapped briefs|crapped briefs]].

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] Yeah. I don't like poo.

'''Troll:''' No-one does.

'''Falsion:''' Only [[Christian Weston Chandler|sick weirdos]] like poop.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' I know I don't.

'''Falsion:''' I won't say much then.

'''Chris:''' What?

[''pause'']

'''Falsion:''' Yeah, we were talking to Clyde.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] Well I had- well I had up some [[vivitheg's aim chat|cat poo]] now and then, 'n... [''pause''] Uhh-

'''Falsion:''' -did you get a boner?

'''Chris:''' I was trying, I was trying- nnn. What?

[''pause'']

====On Dirty, Crapped Briefs====

'''Falsion:''' Okay, um. Remember [[DIRTY,_CRAPPED_BRIEFS#Transcript|that time]] you were arguing with Clyde, 'n... you said you had like, [[DIRTY,_CRAPPED_BRIEFS|dirty crapped briefs]]? Like, why did you say that to him? [''pause''] I'm kinda confused by that.

'''Chris:''' I don't know, I was uh- I don't know, he-he caught- I don't know, I was, I was... I don't know why I said it.

'''Falsion:''' Oh. Oh, oh, I- [''Falsion and a troll talk over each other''] remember what happened now.

'''Troll:''' -Yeah, you said you had dirty, crapped briefs. I remember, cuz-cuz he was, he was, calling you on the uhh- um, on- on the um, on the [[nudes|women's underwear thing]]. That's right.

'''Falsion:''' Oh, yeah yeah yeah. That's right. [''pause''] Cuz-

[''The trolls talk over each other'']

'''Brit-Troll:''' No, he was talking about, um, mm. About Chris's... [[barb|mother's]] underwear. And Chris, you said bra and panties were considered underwear, and underwear is a type of clothing, and uh brief [sic] and boxer equals clothing as well.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh'']

'''Falsion:''' I mean, [[lie|that was a pretty good comeback there]] I just wanna know what... motivated it.

'''Chris:''' I don't remember.

'''Brit-Troll:''' Uhh yes, Clyde can be... Clyde can be an arsehole.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

[''pause'']

'''Falsion:''' Yeah, I-I used that once, someone was like- talking crap to me and I told him that and he like, backed away. So yeah, it was a good comeback.

'''Chris:''' [''quiet''] Uhg.

'''Troll:''' I see, um. [''pause'']

[''audio cut'']

'''Chris:''' I dunno, uh... I might. I might.

'''Troll:''' I'm a cat- I'm a cat person too.

'''Brit-Troll:''' I love cats!-

'''Julie:''' [''high pitched screeching''] MEOW!

'''Brit-Troll:''' -I have one.

'''Cameron:''' [''wistfully''] I'd love to have one some day.

'''Falsion:''' I wish I had one. My mother wouldn't let me.

'''Cameron:''' Mmm. It's- [''inaudible'']-in my apartment to have one.

'''Falsion:''' Oh, she just- she's just allergic.

'''Troll:''' I had another question, uhh- I remember when like, Clyde was showing off that Rabbichoso thing... and you were like, it's a site for ventilation cracks- where do you come up with that? That's so good.

[''Presumably, this is from a Mumble chat that has not been transcribed yet. I could find no record of what the troll is blabbering about.'']

'''Chris:''' [''skeptical''] Ventilation cracks?

'''Troll:''' Yeah, you said his drawing-

'''Brit-Troll:''' -yeah, what does that mean?-

'''Troll:''' -was like a site for a ventilation cracks.

'''Chris:''' [''[[speech impediment|high pitched]], defensive''] I never said that!

'''Falsion:''' That was an awesome comeback.

'''Troll:''' Yes you did.

'''Chris:''' [''annoyed''] I don't remember saying ventilat- I said that- I said that... I said that was crap.

'''Troll:''' Oooooh.

'''Falsion:''' Ohh, even better diss.

'''Chris:''' Yeah I said it was crap.

'''Troll:''' Oh, okay.

'''Chris:''' A'right.

[''pause'']

====Lightening the Mood====

'''Matthew Devoria:''' Hmm. [''pause''] Maybe we should lighten things up a bit. Uhh- Is there anything you [''sudden voice change, voice now quite high pitched''] want to talk about, Chris?

'''Troll:''' Yes.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] Nothing... right at the moment, I mean, I'm... trying to get logged in so I can upload the uh... scanned... letter. [''pause''] So y'all can... read it for yourselves.

'''Matthew Devoria:''' [''faint''] Did you get- [''audio cut'']

'''Troll:''' Yeeah.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah, I'll do- I'll do that eventually. [''pause''] Y'know, soon enough.

[''The trolls all talk over each other, encouraging him to upload it.'']

'''Troll:''' Wait, Chris is trying to talk!

'''Chris:''' Uh, those uh, ju-for your information they are not lost episodes, they are just removable deleted scenes. You know, they can work one way with them or one way with- or another way without 'em. It's just the way I designed it. [pause] Yeah.

'''Troll:''' Also, um, Rosie has a question she typed, she's wondering if you were considering undergoing speech therapy because you seem to have pronouncin-, trouble pronouncing uh, 'th', and all that stuff.

'''Chris:''' I took speech therapy during my early childhood years.

'''Cameron:''' Hmm

'''Brit-Troll:''' Oh me too! I had- I have- I still have troubles pronouncing 'r' words and then-then they just told me it was like a problem with my jaw.

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Troll:''' Also, um, I had a younger brother, true story, that, he couldn't pronounce certain words when he was in kindergarten so yellow he couldn't do y sounds, he was like, 'lellow'. But, going through speech therapy, he's actually overcome it. He's actually a very impressive linguist now.

'''Chris:''' Oh, well that's good. You know I can imitate somebody who doesn't have their two front teeth even though I do have my two front teeth?

'''Troll:''' Oh. Could we hear?

'''Chris:''' [soul-crushing imitation] All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth! My two front teeth! All I want for Chwiss-mathh itth my two fwont teeth!

[trolls start out giggling, devolving into guffaws]

'''Troll:''' That was hilarious.

'''Chris:''' Yeah that's Spike Jones' classic. That you hear every Christmas.

'''Troll:''' It is a classic.

'''Cameron:''' Okay but uh, there's two questions on the side, from Monsieur Parfait: Hey Chris! What are you feelings on the PS3 being the main pick for the gay community and gay online gaming community, using PSN as their main social network-

'''Chris:''' Ok, you can stop right there 'cause you're bothering me. You can stop right there 'cause you're bothering me.

'''Troll:''' We'll toss that question out. Let's move on.

===Communism===

'''Cameron:''' Hamsty wants to know what you think of China. I guess he means the country, so...

'''Chris:''' Yeah, it's a good country.

'''Troll:''' You like Chinese food?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, it's alright.

'''Troll 2:''' So wait, you're saying that communism is good? That's not very American of you.

'''Troll:''' No, that's not-

'''Chris:''' Wait, wait what?

[Chris and Troll 2 talk over each other]

'''Troll 2:''' Communism-

'''Chris:''' Food.

'''Troll 2:''' No, you sai-no you were asked what you think of China. You said you thought it was good. So you're saying that communism is good?

'''Chris:''' What-no. I did not say that. I just said that the country was good.

'''Troll 2:''' Yeah- that-

'''Brit-Troll:''' The country isn't that same as it's government, though.

'''Troll 2:''' No, yes it is, yes it is! They support the communist-

'''Troll:''' Oh you be quiet.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, you be quiet, he's had enough.

===Cwcville Work Force===

'''Troll:''' I was just wondering one thing about uh Cwcville, um, do the people in Cwcville have to work or do they get money from the government?

'''Chris:''' S- yes, it's pretty much like real life, some work, some don't some get eh- you know it's just like- basically real life. Matching there.

'''Troll:''' Oh, so like, everyone has to like, work and stuff?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

[pause]

'''Chris:''' Dude I got the images up, I just uh, put up the link there.

[trolls respond approvingly]

'''Troll:''' Sonichu and Rosechu, do they have a job? Do they have a job or what, because I never like see 'em working in the comic, I'm kinda confused.

'''Chris:''' [stress sigh] Well, it's just like a whole- hmm, there's too many details to figure out there so just- you could just assume that you know there are so many tall buildings, so many office buildings, so many stores and all that, you could assume that a lot- that most everybody is working.

'''Troll:''' So what like, what's Sonichu's job?

'''Chris:''' What?

'''Troll:''' What's uh, Sonichu's job.

'''Chris:''' Oh. Well shoot he's uh...[pause]. Well, he protects Cwcville, for one thing.

'''Troll:''' Does he get paid for it?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I pretty much give him- give him his own privileges.

'''Troll:''' Oh so like everything is free for him?

'''Troll:''' Isn't that an abuse of power? You were democratically elected weren't you?

'''Troll:''' Ok, you need to shut up, really.

'''Troll:''' Someone kick out Crass.

'''Troll:''' Crass, you're acting like an asshole.

'''Troll:''' Chris, I kicked him.

'''Chris:''' Good. Yeah,he was be- he was being very annoying.

'''Troll:''' He has an annoying voice, too.

'''Troll:''' He's also gay.

'''Troll:''' Yeah he's a homo.

[huffing into mic]

'''Troll:''' Yeah anyway.

'''Troll:''' So what about Rosechu, does she work?

'''Chris:''' Hmm, I haven't really thought about- uh, nah- nah- i'd say- nah- she's got same-no. She's got privileges too.

'''Troll:''' Oh, that's cool.

'''Chris:''' But you know its like I couldn't- it's not like I couldn't offer her like a, job or something, I just never really thought about giving the hedgehogs anything-a job- giving the hedgehogs jobs.[troll talks over chris] Just never came up.

'''Troll:''' Yeah, I'm just saying, they always seem to be like, you know, on their like, time off, or like having- on spring breaks and stuff, I just wondered if any of the characters like worked, or what.

'''Chris:''' Hmm. I never really thought about them having jobs. I just-

'''Brit-Troll:''' Well, in a way, their job is to protect Cwcville and, and when they do i bet its really hard and they need all they can-

'''Troll:''' Oh, they all protect Cwcville?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' Oh, I thought it was just Sonichu's job.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

[pause]

===More Anime Suggestions===

'''Troll:''' Alright, uh, anyone else have any questions?

'''Logan:''' Uh, yes, uh did you happen to get my uh, pm, Chris? On Skype?

'''Chris:''' Um, uh, are you Logan?

'''Logan:''' Yes, that's me.

'''Chris:''' Yeah I got them.

'''Logan:''' Alright.

'''Chris:''' Ok.

'''Logan:''' Uh, just download that later of your own free leisure.

'''Chris:''' Ok.

'''Logan:''' It's a highly recommended one. It's what...Julie got me into a little while back.

'''Chris:''' [annoyed] Oh. I see.

'''Logan:''' Mm-hmm.

'''Troll:''' Yeah it's, it's made by sonic game, actually.

'''Julie:''' Chris, you should really play with us.

'''Chris:''' Uh, what on your uh, your PS online thing?

'''Julie:''' No um, Phantasy Star Online, yeah, you should play with us.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, Ph- oh- yeah I'll think about that. Oh yeah I just- yeah I was just- yeah I was just uh...uh yeah, uh Logan you were talking about the one your anime was uh, it's out- dynas-destiny?

'''Logan:''' Uh no it's uh, there's two I was trying to make you watch, uh, one is called [[wikipedia:Higurashi When They Cry|When They Cry]] and the other is-

'''Chris:''' Oh yeah. Yeah I see that. Alright well yeah I'll just- yeah well I'll just download the torrents and all. Download them- from the torrents. Later on. I have uh- I have- I have the uh, I have a- Limewire.

'''Troll:''' Oh I- yeah, I use that too, every now and then.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

===Spice Girls===

'''Troll:''' Also um, Monsieur Parfait also asked you um, uh who was your favorite Spice Girl, Christian, and why?

'''Chris:''' Spice Girl. Uh, I'm not really sure. But I do- But I do- But I ''did'' like Spice Girls. I just never really thought of which one was my favorite.

'''Brit-Troll:''' I liked Emma, Baby Spice.

'''Troll:''' I liked Scary Spice 'cause she's scary.

'''Troll:''' I liked Sporty, she seemed pretty nice.

'''Troll:''' Yeah.

[pause]

'''Chris:''' [disinterested] Yeah.

[pause]

===The History of Cwcville===

'''Troll:''' So Chris, when was Cwcville founded?

'''Chris:''' Hmm...I've gi- I gave that some thought, I just uh, haven't uh, made it official yet. But mmm...yeah I- yeah I figure that uh, for the origin story of Cwcville, basically it was founded by my father. And he named it- and he named it after- me, cause I was just born. Cause I woulda just been born.

'''Troll:''' And it would be like, your legacy and stuff.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' So it would be born in- so it would have been founded in...1982?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

===On Copyrights===

'''Troll:''' Oh that's pretty neat. Um, Chris, I was wondering, um, do you remember um, people were talking about like, you- you say you copyrighted Sonichu around the year 2000, and um people were um say-, people were otherwise claiming that um, maybe you didn't have it copyrighted, maybe that it's not in the database but, I was wondering, to prove them wrong, can you show us the copyright? [wheedling] Can you show us your copyright for Sonichu?

'''Chris:''' Oh....what are you talking about, like uh, papers and such?

'''Troll:''' Yeah.

'''Chris:''' Mostly- yeah well mostly I just did like uh, what my father told me-what my father told me was viable, little c-in-a circle.

'''Troll:''' Uh, the, instant one. Well, there's also um, registered copyrights or um-[Chris interrupts]

'''Chris:''' Yeah well- yeah well actually I did pay 35 bucks to uh...[talking to himself] hang on I got you on book mark...uh, shoot- Oh yeah, to the Library of Congress, I paid them 35 bucks for- for a copyright on that but I haven't heard any- I haven't heard anything back from them.

'''Troll:''' Oh, w-when did that happen?

'''Chris:''' Years ago.

'''Troll:''' Oh, I see.

'''Troll:''' You know, you should try to get a new copyright, maybe they'll listen this time.

'''Troll:''' Or, what you can do is um, go to um, copyrights.gov, that's actually where I had them copyright a patent one time.

'''Chris:''' I see, hmm.

'''Troll:''' The rate's like 45 dollars now, but I mean, an extra ten bucks, I don't think it would hurt.

'''Chris:''' Hmm. Well, I'll consider that.

'''Troll:''' I mean there's rumors that Clyde might be able to forge uh, forge documents to get it copyrighted before you, maybe you should get on that. I mean I-

'''Chris:''' [stress sigh, pause] Well anyway uh, importantly did uh, y'all see the letter I've uploaded.

'''Troll:''' Yeah that's right.

[audio skipping, windows beeping, long pause]

'''Troll:''' I've been wondering, what does Cwc cola taste like?

'''Troll:''' Actually, this doesn't look real at all. I mean uh, Nintendo Of America, Incorporated, aren't they called uh,- wait, wait a second hold on-

'''Chris:''' Yeah, yeah it's Nintendo of America, ''Inc''

'''Troll:''' Hmm

'''Troll:''' I don't know, this doesn't look- legit for some reason.

'''Chris:''' I mean look at the letterhead!

'''Troll:''' It's easy to fake a letterhead though, you know.

'''Troll:''' Yeah you can even buy one of those.

'''Troll:''' I mean I could copy and paste and put that into, you know, a word template or something like that.

'''Chris:''' No, that's a real signature.

'''Troll:''' What people can do is like, sometimes they just plain take the signature from another paper and they can put it on anything else and s-

'''Chris:''' [stress sigh]

'''Troll:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' I mean like, ok it's been like, it's actually serious offenses as well, it's like, people are copyrighting um, signatures, it's like identity theft.

'''Troll:''' Yeah.

'''Troll:''' I'll tell you what I'll do, Chris. One of my other cousins is a uh, he's a forensics analysis...guy. He uh, he reads like, notes people leave at the scene of a crime or letters from criminal cases and he can tell when something's fake or, someone like, you know, there was a case one time when someone murdered someone, and they forged a suicide note but they took [it to] him and he read it and looked to make sure that it was actually, you know, they wanted to see whether or not it was real, and he can spot a fake like, you know, like nothing.

'''Chris:''' All right well you do what you want.

'''Troll:''' Ok.

===A Wild Clyde Appears!===

'''Chris:''' All right well- all right well it's been fun but uh, i'm gonna head home now, I should get something to eat and uh,-

'''Julie:''' Uh oh, Chris.

'''Chris:''' Yes, Julie?

'''Julie:''' He's here...

[trolls groan]

'''Chris:''' Well then it's a good time to...

'''Clyde''' Well, wait! What do you say to one last showdown?

'''Troll:''' We don't even want you in here Clyde, what are you doing here?

'''Clyde''' [says something about Julie] She might not admit, but she's worried for the future with you.

'''Troll:''' [super dramatic voice] Die, monster! You don't belong in this world!

'''Troll:''' Wow, that's gonna threaten him.

'''Clyde''' C'mon Julie, admit it.

'''Chris:''' Hey Clyde, you can lay off-

'''Julie:''' I talked to him, but that's it.

'''Troll:''' Clyde, you're worthless [unintelligible]

'''Troll:''' Clyde you are an asshole.

'''Chris:''' Everybody pipe down. Everybody pipe down.

'''Troll:''' Fuck you Clyde.

'''Chris:''' Clyde, I talked to Vivian. And everything's o- and everything's okay. You can lay off.

'''Clyde''' No, I refuse to lay off. '''Forget''' whatever the '''bitch''' says! Alright? 'Cause '''I've''' been talking with Julie, and '''she's''' gonna have a miserable life if she '''goes''' with you. '''I've''' been talking to her '''goddamn''' parents, and they're gonna fucking take her away. [pause] Tell me Chris...

'''Chris:''' Clyde, you can, Clyde, just lay off- we- I know that Vivian-

'''Clyde''' Julie I- Julie- come on-

'''Chris:''' -I know that Vivian has asked you to uh, just to try to pick on- to pick on me to get me to clean up my room and I did clean up my room. I got- I held up my end of the bargain so why don't you just leave us alone?

'''Clyde''' Look, it's not enough, it's by '''Julie's''' request. Not Vivian's, not mine, but '''Julie's''' request. She just couldn't have the balls to tell you.

'''Chris:''' [stress sigh]

'''Clyde''' Right Julie?

'''Julie:''' Ummm....yes.

'''Clyde''' She's '''worried''' and '''I'm''' trying to get it '''to''' you, through your little head, that's '''she''' is just gonna break it off if '''you''' don't clean up your god-damned act.

'''Chris:''' Julie, you se- I did clean up my room.

'''Clyde''' That's not all. Tell me Chris, do you pay your taxes?

'''Chris:''' Mmm...I don't have to pay my taxes.

'''Clyde:''' Why?

'''Chris:''' My family - my family helps me manage my taxes, and I don't have that much uh, income to tax.

'''Clyde:''' But either way- but when your parents are gone who's gonna help you do the taxes?

'''Chris:''' [stress sigh] I'll worry about that when that- when I cross that bridge.

'''Clyde''' God- oh come- you have to know now, you're 26 years old, you musta paid taxes a couple times. You gotta figure that out, man.

'''Chris:''' I paid sales tax.

'''Clyde''' [sigh] Chris, you have a credit card right. So how- how- how much debt do you have on that card?

'''Chris:''' I take- I plead the fifth.

'''Clyde''' You plead the fifth? Ohhh, come on, Julie '''has''' to know about your financial situation.

'''Chris:''' If Julie wants to know she and I can dis- discuss it in private. We don't need you to uh-

'''Julie:''' Chris...Clyde does have somewhat of a point. I '''am''' kind of worried about... the future.

'''Clyde:''' I'm just trying to help here. If you two went on your crazy ass marriage you two would have been divorced in a month. I'm trying to goddamn help. You better answer me.

'''Chris:''' Fine, I have a huge credit card debt.

'''Clyde:''' Well how much? I would like to quantify this so I can do some calculations.

'''Chris:''' Hmm...nearly 2K.

'''Clyde:''' Ugh, man. And you said you had a savings of one hundred? That leaves you with one thousand, nine hundred. To start a marriage with. You are screwed!

'''Chris:''' No, I pay it off in monthly payments.

'''Clyde:''' And how long, do you think it will take you to pay it off?

'''Chris:''' Due time.

'''Clyde:''' It's going to take you ''years'' to pay that off. Tell me, how much do you pay off each month?

'''Chris:''' I pay off about a hundred each month.

'''Clyde:''' You do know that's compound with interest, right?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Clyde:''' It's going to take you ''ten'' years to pay that off if you keep doing minimum payments.

'''Chris:''' [''stress sigh'']

'''Clyde:''' What-what is your credit score?

'''Chris:''' I don't know my credit score.

'''Clyde:''' You should look that up. You get for free, once a year, from three different companies. You should get it and report back to me, okay? Because Julie doesn't understand this, but I do, and I can help you with this. I'm just trying to goddamn help you. Don't take this as an insult, but if you want your marriage ruined, fine.

'''Chris:''' Well Clyde, I'll tell you what. If you wanna help me, you can come see me in person and we can talk about this.

'''Julie:''' Chris, can I say something?

'''Chris:''' Yes Julie?

'''Julie:''' You could try getting a job. That could also help, when we do get married.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, when the time comes and I decide-and uh, and ah-when the decision comes that I'll have to get a job then I will.

'''Julie:''' Alright, thank you.

'''Clyde:''' But you don't have any capital now! You don't have any money now!

'''Chris:''' Clyde, you've done enough.

'''Clyde:''' Really? That's just the tip of the iceberg. I mean, what-what's the-can you even cook?

'''Chris:''' Yes, I can.

'''Clyde:''' What can you cook?

'''Chris:''' I can cook anything that's within my cookbook.

'''Clyde:''' What is your favorite thing to cook for Julie. I'm sure she'd love to know.

'''Chris:''' A good chicken noodle soup.

'''Clyde:''' Fantastic. Doesn't that sound delicious, Julie?

'''Julie:''' [''on the brink of tears''] It could be...I don't know!

'''Chris:''' Julie don't listen to-Julie don't listen to Clyde.

'''Clyde:''' She's not worried about me, she's worried about your future.

'''Chris:''' Julie, you don't have to worry, we'll work it out!

'''Julie:''' But Chris, I am worried!

'''Clyde:''' And another thing, Chris. How much fast food do you eat goddamn!

'''Julie:''' Chris, can I suggest something?

'''Chris:''' Yeah?

'''Julie:''' You could better yourself, you could take...lessons and you could get a really high paying job. I just wanna suggest that cause I'm really...I will admit, I am worried about the future, I'm sorry.

'''Chris:''' Julie, I understand your concern. And you don't have to worry, I'll get myself a jo-I'll get a-I'll get myself a job soon enough, I'll would like it-I would appreciate it if you would still have faith in me and have faith in the future.

'''Julie:''' Alright, I'm still somewhat unsure...

'''Clyde:'''[talking over Julie]You're going to have faith when you don't see any action?

'''Julie:''' ...but, I can. But Chris, what job will you get?

'''Chris:''' Hmm, I tried to, uh, get best job there is available around here, that I could get from, umm, from my previous experiences at least and my CADD degrees and whatnot.

'''Julie:''' Oh, okay.

'''Clyde:''' You haven't looked, have you? You're lying, aren't you?

'''Chris:''' You're right, I haven't looked, but that doesn't mean I can't ''start'' looking so I can start looking!

'''Julie:''' Chris, I've-I've been thinking, and I think Clyde really is trying to help us. You need to help Clyde help us, do you know what I mean?

'''Clyde:''' You have been lying to Julie about looking for a job? Christ Almighty, how much have you lied to her?

'''Chris:''' But, Clyde, I'm willing to accept your help, but you do not need to be having such an insultive tone that you're giving off.

'''Clyde:''' Chris, there's a reason why I do this. I am the last resort, okay? I am the last chance for you to salvage any type of relationship with ''any'' woman. Y'know, you can sweet talk a woman, you can sweet talk any of your Sonichu Girls, but you know what? Within a month, you'll be divorced by Every. Single. One.

'''Chris:''' I did-that doesn't mean-I mean I never said that we'd have to get married right away, I never said that.

'''Clyde:''' Even then when you two are living together-it's not about marriage, it's about ''being together'', even.

[''long pause'']

'''Chris:''' Well like I said when the time comes I'll deal with it at my own pace, but, y'know right now I can and I promised Julie that I will-

'''Clyde:''' Don't deal it at your pace, deal it at your relationship's pace. AKA, you and Julie. Don't be selfish.

'''Julie:''' Chris, I've been doing some research in Christianity. Isn't that what you said you had-what you followed?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Julie:''' And I read it, and apparently there's no sex before marriage, it's God's way.

'''Chris:''' Well, actually, uh, actually, under the Methodist faith, it's-uh, it's okay.

'''Julie:''' Alright, but I'm still wondering. It is God's way, maybe, wait who is it?

'''Chris:''' It's-uh it's okay Julie. Julie, I tried-

'''Julie:''' No! How is it alright, though?

'''Chris:''' As long as you and I and we love each other truly.

'''Julie:''' Hnm.

'''Clyde:''' Okay. Okay, okay, I got another question. What- How much- What kind of, I mean, do you cook for yourself? Every week? Or you do go out for fast-food or something.

'''Chris:''' I cook myself- for myself the majority of the week.

[''pause'']

'''Julie:''' Hnmm. Chris, what do you make?

'''Clyde:''' Or do you just go out to eat?

'''Chris:''' I did not go out to eat every day of the week, Clyde.

'''Clyde:''' But how often?

'''Chris:''' I'd say probably 2 or 3- 2 or 3 meals out of the week.

'''Clyde:''' So the rest of the time, you cook. Right?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Clyde:''' Wha- what, so? What do you cook? For yourself, that is.

'''Chris:''' I cook for myself a lot of things.

'''Clyde:''' Like what? I mean, Julie would love to know what you can cook, so she have uh, you know, feeling what her diet might be.

'''Julie:''' Yes, what do you make for yourself? I don't mean to side with Clyde, but, what do you make for yourself?

'''Chris:''' I make uh, I make myself some veget- some vegetables and uh, meat, some soups... depends on what I have with me after shopping has happened.

'''Clyde:''' You cook for your parents, then, right?

'''Chris:''' No, my parents, they pretty much take care of themselves.

'''Clyde:''' That's...kinda selfish that you don't cook for them. I mean, your living with them.

'''Chris:''' Well, they have their- they live on two separated- their downstairs and I'm upstairs.

'''Clyde:''' Goddamn, I mean, you just, move out! I mean, Christ. Julie would- Julie, do you feel confortable with Chris' parents --

'''Chris:''' I'd like to move out but it's kinda hard for me to know my destination, and I'm not sure what my destination would be when I move out. At this time. But uh, after Julie, after Julie moves here and finds her apartment, I'm willing to move out of my house and move in with her.

'''Clyde:''' And how much do you think you gonna support Julie? I mean, you said you gonna be the house husband, right?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Clyde:''' So why isn't YOU looking for the house and not her?

'''Chris:''' I'll wait- I'll wait for Julie to come here and she and I can go looking together.

'''Julie:''' ...Chris? Can I tell you something, Chris?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Julie:''' I did some math, and 800 dollars a month is not only --interrepted by Windows bleeps-- part-time and the family is more than that.

'''Chris:''' Uh...by the family, you mean, you and me?

'''Julie:''' I believe so, yes.

'''Chris:''' ...Yeah. *sigh* Alright, well, yeah, well, I will definitely work into finding a job. I promisse you, Julie.

'''Julie:''' I am not sure if I can get many jobs, you know, as I am considered immigrant.

'''Chris:''' Yeah I understand. I'll look for it. I'll look for work.

'''Julie:''' Thank you, Chris.

'''Clyde:''' And what you gonna look for?

'''Chris:''' *big sigh* Depends on uh, who's hiring around here and what I can find avaliable to me that's, uh works with my abilities.

'''Julie:''' Chris, you should try and get one now, so you could help saving money for renting day.

'''Chris:''' I will think about that.

'''Clyde:''' I mean what kind of position are you looking for?

'''Chris:''' Can't say right now, because... just came- this whole- this just came with the spurr of the moment.

'''Clyde:''' I mean, you gotta look for a dream job or something, right?

'''Chris:''' *sigh* I never had a dream job.

'''Clyde:''' He's never had... you've never even thought about getting that perfect job- ever?

'''Chris:''' I just never had, just never had a job occurred in a dream.

'''Clyde:''' I don't mean literally! It just means something that you would like to do for the rest of your life.

'''Chris:''' Well, when it comes to work, I'm just not short- I'm just not sure.

'''Julie:''' -- worried.

'''Chris:''' Aww. But Julie, Julie, for the best of abilities I'm willing to uh, go out and work and find something that I can do. I mean, even- even if it's an office job.

'''Julie:''' Uh..

'''Clyde:''' What do you do everyday, Chris? What you do? I mean, you don't have a job, you play videogames, what else do you do?

'''Chris:''' *SIGH* I do a lot, I dot a lot of things everyday.

'''Clyde:''' That was not specific enough. I want to know how you do your time management--

[''weird noises'']

'''Chris:''' Well because currently I am without a job- because currently, without a job, it's kind of- it's kinda varies from day to day. But I am willing to get a job and make it more solid for the day-to-day of my future.

'''Clyde:''' I mean, you- what do you do at home, do you just sit there? Hoping money is going to fly to you or something?

'''Chris:''' No.

'''Clyde:''' Then, what do you do?

'''Chris:''' I do a lot of creative things, like- yeah, yesterday I cleaned up my room.

'''Julie:''' Actually, Chris, what do you do everyday? I'm wondering.

[''awkward silence'']

'''Julie:''' ...Chris?

'''Chris:''' I am, yeah, I'm just thinking.

[''more silence'']

'''Chris:''' Mostly I'm creative. But I have things to do everyday.

'''Clyde:''' You're not being specific enough, you're just saying ''I have things''. What? Do you just jack-off all day?

'''Chris:''' NO!

'''Clyde:''' Well, what do you do?

'''Chris:''' Right now I don't have a very solid schedule, like you know, what I do on a day-to-day basis.

'''Clyde:''' I mean, you could at least gone to school and, you know, get something.

'''Chris:''' I did go to school and I did get something...

'''Clyde:''' Go to school again.

'''Chris:''' ...and I'm willing to get a job and-- I'm willing to get a job based on what I have learned from my school days.

'''Julie:''' Hey Chris? Chris? Chris, can I say something?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Julie:''' As long you're on your free time, you should really try to work more on you comic and make as much money as you can, because that's kinda is your job, at least right now.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. It is.

'''Julie:''' So can you work harder on the comic?

'''Clyde:''' *laugh* You fail at that, the only thing with your time it's make those Sonichu comics and you can only pop one out every four months, having my brother- GODDAMN YOU CHRIS.

'''Chris:''' Julie, I promisse to work harder and more swifting on my comics.

'''Julie:''' Alright, thank you.

'''Chris:''' I will- I'm gonna- I gonna heel now I'll talk to you later, Julie.

'''Clyde:''' Just another of my goddamn words, Chris.

'''Julie:''' Chris, one last thing?

'''Chris:''' Yeah?

'''Julie:''' About the comics, you should try and get one of these monthly or at least bi-monthly.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Clyde:''' And how you're gonna make money with that? You're just wasting your time.

'''Julie:''' Wait, Chris

'''Chris:''' Uh?

'''Julie:''' Are you still gonna play burnout?

'''Chris:''' Tonight, yeah.

'''Julie:''' We are-

'''Clyde:''' And that's what you do with your spare time, play Burnout. Ha ha ha.

'''Chris:''' CLYDE, SHUT UP™. I'll talk to you later, Julie.

'''Julie:''' Okay, I'll turn on my PS3.

'''Chris:''' Ich baan schwill, Julie.

'''Julie:''' Okay. Ich bin schwul.

[''Chris disconnects'']

'''Clyde:''' SKAJSHRLA oh-

'''Bluespike:''' Haha! Oh! He said ''I'm gay'' What a faggot! Did y'all hear that? Chris is gay! He says so himself!

[''Trolls talk over each other'']

'''Troll:''' You actually got him to say it!

'''Troll:''' But you said it as well, so I don't know, man...

'''Bluespike:''' Oh oh. You're right. STAY ST-RAIGHT.

'''Troll:''' Goddamnit Bluspike, you wanna play videogame-

[''random shit'']

{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 5|Mumble Chat 5]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 7|Mumble Chat 7]]|}}

== Links ==

[http://www.mediafire.com/?n21yzouz2nv Download]

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Mumble chats]]

Talk:A message to the Trolls

2010-03-11T03:27:54Z

Loserbrain:

I got the transcript! [[User:Ash link|Ash link]] 00:58, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
:Godspeed sir. Godspeed.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 01:02, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
::whoops, go ahead and edit over mine, it's not that great. --[[User:Digital|Digital]] 01:09, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
:::Thanks a lot dude for letting me do that! I used your idea for the You won't let me speech! Thanks again! [[User:Ash link|Ash link]] 01:11, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Is it me or does chris sound more... melancholic in this vid? He looks like he's acting, I mean more than usual. Anywho, RIP new camera or pseye. [[User:Dave|Dave]]

It's hard to tell because of the light, but to me it looks like his eyes are occasionally looking away from the camera. Is this just him struggling to think of how to express himself, or is this him reading the speech? He seems to be speaking pretty smoothly for upset Chris. Not to mention his choice of words is far more flowery than he normally is, especially when stressed. - [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 01:06, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

==Subject?==
I don't think this video is about Bob, Chris only gets worked up about Gal-Pals, he doesn't care about his own family. Doubting that it's about the mystery man from the bizarre [[Magical Man Potion|birthday video]]. That would only leave Heather.--[[User:Brofose|Brofose]]
*He mentions DEM TROLLZ bringing his friends into this. Sounds like it is NOT about Bob.--[[User:Sonichuistehcool|Sonichuistehcool]] 01:28, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
** He also brings up Mary Lee Walsh and TRUE LOVE IS ILLEGAL IN VIRGINIA in the Captain's Blog, this makes me think his heart level was shattered. Still, Wallflower is safe from Chris and Chris himself is in pain. Blunt, inelegant pain, but that's the pain that hurts him the most.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 01:38, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
:To be fair, there has been no news with Bob, I am assuming two things: He is recovering nicely or Chris really doesn't give a shit about no one but himself. I am point towards the latter, hopeful for the former. [[User:Ash link|Ash link]] 01:18, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
:: It's both. According to PSN contact with Chris, Bob is "doing much better, thank you".--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 01:38, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
Chris doesn't appear to be wearing the medallion or his amnesty ring. Did I miss something in which it was misplaced/stolen/shoved up his anus or has he actually chosen not to wear it? In any case, surely that means that this video isn't TRUE and HONEST content? --[[User:JRampancy|JRampancy]] 01:32, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
* He may have just forgotten to wear it. Or, best case long shot scenario, he gave her the medal and she destroyed it when she found out about him.

I think what happened was, he asked her to be his girlfriend, she said no, and he got upset so what does he do? Blame us. And I'm probably right. --This post has been brought to you by [[User:ShotgunJones|ShotgunJones]] 03:16, 11 March 2010 (UTC). Thanks for reading!

== Anyone else think ==

that bob is dead i mean just look at him he looks broken--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 03:12, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
*No. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 03:27, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Talk:A message to the Trolls

2010-03-11T03:27:48Z

Loserbrain:

I got the transcript! [[User:Ash link|Ash link]] 00:58, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
:Godspeed sir. Godspeed.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 01:02, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
::whoops, go ahead and edit over mine, it's not that great. --[[User:Digital|Digital]] 01:09, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
:::Thanks a lot dude for letting me do that! I used your idea for the You won't let me speech! Thanks again! [[User:Ash link|Ash link]] 01:11, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Is it me or does chris sound more... melancholic in this vid? He looks like he's acting, I mean more than usual. Anywho, RIP new camera or pseye. [[User:Dave|Dave]]

It's hard to tell because of the light, but to me it looks like his eyes are occasionally looking away from the camera. Is this just him struggling to think of how to express himself, or is this him reading the speech? He seems to be speaking pretty smoothly for upset Chris. Not to mention his choice of words is far more flowery than he normally is, especially when stressed. - [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 01:06, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

==Subject?==
I don't think this video is about Bob, Chris only gets worked up about Gal-Pals, he doesn't care about his own family. Doubting that it's about the mystery man from the bizarre [[Magical Man Potion|birthday video]]. That would only leave Heather.--[[User:Brofose|Brofose]]
*He mentions DEM TROLLZ bringing his friends into this. Sounds like it is NOT about Bob.--[[User:Sonichuistehcool|Sonichuistehcool]] 01:28, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
** He also brings up Mary Lee Walsh and TRUE LOVE IS ILLEGAL IN VIRGINIA in the Captain's Blog, this makes me think his heart level was shattered. Still, Wallflower is safe from Chris and Chris himself is in pain. Blunt, inelegant pain, but that's the pain that hurts him the most.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 01:38, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
:To be fair, there has been no news with Bob, I am assuming two things: He is recovering nicely or Chris really doesn't give a shit about no one but himself. I am point towards the latter, hopeful for the former. [[User:Ash link|Ash link]] 01:18, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
:: It's both. According to PSN contact with Chris, Bob is "doing much better, thank you".--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 01:38, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
Chris doesn't appear to be wearing the medallion or his amnesty ring. Did I miss something in which it was misplaced/stolen/shoved up his anus or has he actually chosen not to wear it? In any case, surely that means that this video isn't TRUE and HONEST content? --[[User:JRampancy|JRampancy]] 01:32, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
* He may have just forgotten to wear it. Or, best case long shot scenario, he gave her the medal and she destroyed it when she found out about him.

I think what happened was, he asked her to be his girlfriend, she said no, and he got upset so what does he do? Blame us. And I'm probably right. --This post has been brought to you by [[User:ShotgunJones|ShotgunJones]] 03:16, 11 March 2010 (UTC). Thanks for reading!

== Anyone else think ==

that bob is dead i mean just look at him he looks broken--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 03:12, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
**No. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 03:27, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Talk:The Wallflower

2010-03-11T02:32:51Z

Loserbrain:

Okay faggots, listen up. No personal details. Ever. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 01:14, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
*Gotcha. [[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 01:18, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
**Am I missing something here? Didn't Chris just inform us that this girl (Heather, right?) is no longer interested in him, with Message to the Trolls? So why are we locking down details about her now, when EDF can do no more damage? Or is there more to this?--[[User:Sonichuistehcool|Sonichuistehcool]] 01:22, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
***I'm sure that she got some sort of email/phone call, but we don't know enough about her or the situation to assume that she's fully out of the picture. Until then, it's better to have less info than too much info. [[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 01:24, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
Some explanation please? I mean, all the other galpal articles have info, what happened here? [[User:Dave|Dave]]
*i have received a message from wallflower herself asking for her info to be removed. while i'd rather not remove any information, at the same time, the article was focusing on personal details about heather that weren't at all related to chris. since i'd rather avoid any trouble here, i've complied with her request. this new article should be used purely for chris-related information, since she is part of christory. if chris uploads information, then you can add it here, but don't add anything you found through internet investigation or whatever. --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 01:28, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
** A'ight, but can we have a background on the story on cwcki? You know, what happened for them to break up and stuff. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 01:29, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
*** There's no break up as far as I know. But I'm sure something must have happened between yesterday and today. We can document the drama but be vague. Example: Dedicated trolls found her information and then Chris got mad. Real mad. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 01:38, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
****Does this mean all the sweetheart pages are going to be changed? -PeaceCeapPea
*****Most of the sweethearts were trolls. Megan avoid this site like rape, so I don't think we need to worry about it. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 02:32, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
*Why are we doing this? Didn't Megan ask us for her dox to be taken off the internet? How do we know the message wasn't sent by a troll or a white knight?--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 02:12, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
**Have you seen the latest video from Chris? He found the CWCki. I guess "WallFlower" used Google. Another thing; Chris volunteered the info we got on him. She dint. We dint passed the Dox of other sweethearts or made fun of them as we did with her. Just for this, It had to be removed. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 02:29, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

Talk:CWCipedia

2010-03-11T02:28:44Z

Loserbrain: /* Since Chris has found CWCki */

== A question ==
I'm not posting this on the CWCipedia itself, because, ahem, I'm unaware of the community rules of that site. It seems to me that [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Special:Listusers Chris is the only real user] - shouldn't user registration and anonymous editing be disabled? ([http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Manual:FAQ#How_do_I_administrate.2Fmanage_user_rights.3F howto]) And why isn't Chris a Sysop? If one wants to test the MediaWiki's suitability, as this article claims, we should give the user a little bit more tools. =) Just don't give him Oversight. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 11:46, 30 July 2009 (CEST)

*CWCipedia is the wiki that only CWC can edit. Myself and Cogs share sysop privileges because Chris has no fucking clue how a wiki works and he sure as hell doesn't know how/want to do boring shit like categorize things, make templates, etc. (just like this wiki, lol).We've more or less told Chris "Chris! Here's a page like Wikipedia all to yourself and nobody can ban you or anything! Knock yourself out" There's a reason why this looks like his old website, it's because to him this is just the new incarnation of it.

:The idea that only Chris can edit it is so we here on CWCki have an accurate and public source that can be cited in articles and it's in a format that is easy for Chris to use and edit. The Wikipedia article was a goldmine of information, now Chris has an entire wiki to do this and he can go crazy with it.

:But yeah, there's no way to register for CWCipedia, and no one can edit anonymously. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:05, 30 July 2009 (CEST)
:: Ah, so the stuff ''is'' disabled. I was confused because the login button says "Login/Create account". I forgot that old MediaWiki version show that whether or not accounts can be created and didn't actually check if I can see a reg form. New MW versions just say "Login" if account creation is disabled. Oh well. Oh, and a side note - just a few days ago, I was wondering "what would happen if people hinted to Chris that Chris would probably be very welcome in Conservapedia (the wiki for Good Patriotic Christians)"... and boom, we suddenly got CWCkipedia. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 22:48, 30 July 2009 (CEST)

==A Concern==
I understand where you're coming from by giving Chris this tool, but considering the current issue of space, I wonder whether hosting it on the same 110mb account is wise. I noticed he's uploading his songs as you can see [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Special:Imagelist here] which are going to eat up space really fast. He's also uploading the entire comic series at full resolution which unnecessarily violates the limit (is that even enabled on his side?) and if I'm not mistaken, we already have them on this side right? Duplicating these is also going to eat up a great deal of space as well.

Lastly, I hope you made sure he has a secure password. I don't know how many of the previous account hacks were done by individuals, but I'm sure this new Chris-only wiki will be a prime target for newfags wanting to prove their 1337 5k!11z. --[[User:Whoreos n' Milf|Whoreos n' Milf]] 20:16, 31 July 2009 (CEST)
*Actually, we don't really have any of the comics here though cogs hosts an old mirror site of the old Sonichu.net circa November 2008. Cogs has reassured me that we do have enough space but if does become a serious issue with Chris, we'll subtly redirect the media links to RapidShare or some site like that.

:I'm not sure Chris really understands the concept of webspace. I know the concept of HD space isn't foreign to him, as he wishes they made bigger HDs for his PS3 so he can download more crap, but I'm guessing on his old space he got some unholy amount of space and since it was just him, he knocked himself out. He has a vague idea that Cogs hosts other sites but he assumes that Cogs can worry about space.

:Also, pretty much the way Chris's accounts were hacked where that they were either given to someone (in the form of "Hey Chris, can I have your password?" "SURE, IT'S ______ I LOVE YOU [X]!") or because Chris had an insanely easy password recovery question ("What is the name of your favorite pet?" "What is your favorite book?" and shit Chris has blabbed out over 9000 times). If someone tries to reset Chris's password, they'd have to get into ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com and that, my friend, will be tricky. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:57, 1 August 2009 (CEST)

:*All right then, might I suggest having Chris set up a [http://www.mediafire.com MediaFire] account to put his music on. Someone could explain the site space limit like a memory card that only has 110mb and we need to stretch it as far as possible. MediaFire on the other hand is free and allows single files up 100mb with unlimited storage space and bandwidth. Plus he could set a custom url such as www.mediafire.com/CWC for people to go to to download his TRUE and HONEST works.
::But enough of me touting a sharing serice, what I came to mention is an error on the CWCipedia. I'm guessing the mistake of having the [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_10/Page_1 page 1 of Issue 10] next button linking to page 2 of Issue 0 is probably from copying the same template pages for each issue and just changing the links and this got missed. Anyway, my guess is Chris wouldn't know what's wrong and probably wouldn't notice it anyway so is there a page here dedicated to contacting the sysops regarding problems on the other side?
::Also, 110mb is a free hosting service right? if Chris realizes what else is being hosted on cogsdev, well, shit'll hit the fan big time. Maybe we should create a different domain for him, sort of a 'not putting all our eggs in one basket' type of situation. This way he won't be interfering with CWCki space. --[[User:Whoreos n' Milf|Whoreos n' Milf]] 06:24, 1 August 2009 (CEST)
::*..And now he's gone and posted a link to the album page in his singstar challenge video *braces for whiteknights* --[[User:Whoreos n' Milf|Whoreos n' Milf]] 16:48, 1 August 2009 (CEST)

==A Reputable Source?==
Alright, so maybe we can't expect anything reliable from Chris's mouth, and he is lazy as all fuck, but his "In his own words" article references Ivy as his sweetheart in the present tense. I know that article in particular was a copy-paste job, but what are we really reading here? I've read survivalist neo-fascist manifestos that make more sense. On the other hand, we're getting all kinds of primo new bullshit material, so I guess it's a wash? [[User:CDiddles|CDiddles]] 08:58, 8 August 2009 (CEST)
*Since this is a valid point, in general (how can we be sure of anything Chris says to be true?), I'll address it. There's some truth to what Chris says though. Stuff Chris says, however warped and twisted, is still more or less reputable because there's usually some truth compared to us assuming things or speculating. Point is, if we started to assume Chris wasn't a reputable source, then our CWCki would just be an entire wiki of people speculating shit and that's not encyclopedic.

:Yeah, Chris has a warped view of things where it comes to him, and in some cases he's too lazy to revise things. But there's usually some truth in what Chris says and so CWCipedia, is for the most part, a reputable source. But given Chris, it gives Chris's take on things, giving insight to how he views the world, and gives us impetus to double check with any outside information we have. For instance, Chris will babble on about how he was a volunteer gym leader at The Game Place and how everyone but Michael Snyder loved him and he was a positive influence. I actually managed to hunt down Mimms and asked him about this. Turns out Chris was a volunteer gym leader - for one week, when the regular guy was out. Otherwise, Chris was a liability and a pest at The Game Place.

:tl;dr - CWCipedia is the best new source of stuff straight from Chris and it gives us some insight into his head. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:22, 8 August 2009 (CEST)

== As quoted on main page... ==

: ''Also, THIS WEBSITE IS ON MY RESUME; if it is Down For The Count when the people at N.O.A. or Comic Book Company was trying to look it up, they may peg me for some kind of looney or something.'' (Chris to WikiAdmin)
Now we've seen one more face of Chris - that of an irate computer service customer. Can someone point out to Chris that he hasn't signed a service contract with Cogsdev, more importantly one that would include a [[wikipedia:Service level agreement|SLA]] clause? Uptime is not guaranteed unless it is formally agreed to be guaranteed. Chris reminds me of that anecdote about an irate small business owner: "I need to get this fixed now! Downtime on my e-commerce site means I'm losing hundreds of thousands of dollars of potential income every day!" - and when the admin checks the logs, he finds out the guy gets two visits a day on average. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 09:19, 25 August 2009 (CEST)

* Didn't think this own wiki gig would be so successful, but it is.The whole cwcipedia reeks of Chris's brand of stinking narcissistic man sauce. It makes me feel nauseous just reading it. Being an ass to the TRUE and ORIGINAL owner of the site isn't a real surprise to me since he has always felt entitled to everything he wanted and woe be to anyone who stands in his way. God I hate him so much. --[[User:Hayate666|Hayate666]] 12:18, 25 August 2009 (CEST)

== Retconning on CWCipedia ==

As others have likely noticed, Chris has actually retconned the names of characters based on people in real life on CWCipedia with crude edits. Mary Lee Walsh changed to Slaweel Ryam (or just Slaweel the Witch), Sarah Nicole Hammer changed to Nicole Rammer, and one of his sloppiest edits is of Hanna's name in [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_1/Page_45 Sub-Episode 2, Page 45] where the white box he used to cover over the word Hanna now stretches into the monitor he's typing his whiny email into (replaced by the name 'Fandanna'). There's already a note on Mary Lee Walsh's page about the name change, but should we possibly record all the retconning he's done on CWCipedia within this article? [[User:SirCucumber|SirCucumber]] 15:22, 11 September 2009 (CEST)
: In my opinion, put all retconning you spot to the respective articles, and also note that this retconning occurred in CWCipedia. CWCipedia is just one of Chris's forums and he's perfectly capable of retconning everywhere - what matters is that the source is mentioned if possible. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 16:03, 11 September 2009 (CEST)
*The retconning goes back to Miyamoto saga, when Miyamoto said that they couldn't make the game if the names of real people so Chris instead made up crazy ass names that sound vaguely familiar and/or spelled backwards to get around this. Definitely each article should mention it in each appropriate article, and maybe an overall article on why Chris retconned everything ([[The Great Retconning]] has a ring to it) and detail everything that was changed. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:07, 11 September 2009 (CEST)

== Honest content template ==

Since the "honest content" template is for gross shit (noods and the sex tape, etc) it doesn't seem like this article really should have it on here. I guess if the meaning of the template was expanded to mean "this is stuff Chris made" but I don't know. --[[User:James Lamp-Eye|James Lamp-Eye]] 07:01, 16 November 2009 (CET)
*I think there's some wiggle room with the "honest" template, to include things Chris specifically says is "honest" like CWCipedia, his Wikipedia page, etc. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:04, 16 November 2009 (CET)

== Chris questioning the source of the page ==

As far as I can gather, Chris has never actually questioned the origin of the CWCipedia, nor the intents of Cogsdev, whom he basically treats like a program. I think it should be mention that this entire time Chris has been falling into the hands of the trolls and never once stopped to consider where exactly the whole thing came from. --[[User:CrassCrab|The Great Wizard CrassCrab, Lord of the Seven Realm and Master of the Archane Black Arts of the Eleventh Trans-Dimensional Vortex]] 16:34, 20 November 2009 (CET)

==Idea: An article/section on the discussions between Chris and WikiSysop on CWCpedia==
I just read them, and many of them are pretty lulzy. Also, they offer a good insight into how Chris's mind works, at least concerning Internet and his wiki. Also, his infamous "Take those ads down!" cry is on there. Also, we have articles on Chris's e-mails and chats, and this thing is pretty similar. Also, it's just a fine example of epistolary genre :) What do you think? --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 13:52, 24 November 2009 (CET)

:Chris's reactions to the new ads definitely should be mentioned. Link please! [[User:Glorious Tentacularity|Glorious Tentacularity]] 06:34, 27 November 2009 (CET)

== Points of Interest ==

I think it would be nice if we included a list of notable sections of the CWCipedia, along with links to them, for people that aren't all that obsessive about Chris and would rather just see some of the highlights of his insanity in his own words. For starters, I think the comic should be listed, along with the letters. One article of particular interest is his Private villa of corrupted citizens article, which reads like the mad ramblings of a meth head. --[[User:CrassCrab|The Great Wizard CrassCrab, Lord of the Seven Realm and Master of the Archane Black Arts of the Eleventh Trans-Dimensional Vortex]] 17:48, 30 November 2009 (CET)
*Also, the "Homosexuality" one, which starts with a huge pic of Chris himself smiling (I mentioned it in the [[Homos]] article) --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 17:58, 30 November 2009 (CET)
*I think Crass has the right generic idea, perhaps an overview of the contents of the CWCipedia, and a "Best of..." with sample quotes from it. Obviously we need to focus "Best of" because we can't have the entirety of the CWCipedia in this article. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 19:56, 30 November 2009 (CET)

== Idea: A Gallery of all the advertisements on CWCipedia ==

Today I noticed (at least) two more advertisements on CWCipedia. The one about Aspergers and Autism being on the same spectrum, and another which is an advert for pickles. What say you to a gallery of all the ones that are currently on, and new ones when they are inevitably added. It wouldn't be anything major or important, so it doesn't really deserve its own page, but maybe have a short paragraph about the advertising process on CWCipedia too? --[[User:F4P|Fight4Peace]] 11:41, 3 December 2009 (CET)

== Only few of the banners show up when I refresh CWCipedia ==

Is it supposed to be like that? --[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 20:38, 5 December 2009 (CET)

*I've noticed that too. I've only seen about 10% of the ads that are listed here. --[[User:F4P|Fight4Peace]]
**It appears that one ad picture (presumably the Naïve Water one) has been replaced with the Duck one on CWCipedia. The URL it links to is britishbottledwater.co.uk or something along those lines, and its alt text is 'Drink Local!' --[[User:F4P|Fight4Peace]]

== Ad links? ==

OK, so we have alt texts - but the ad list should definitely have links to the pages the ads point to, too... --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 00:35, 6 December 2009 (CET)
*Good idea. Maybe make the comment to each image a link to the URL it's directed at? --[[User:F4P|Fight4Peace]]

== Closed due to theft? ==

Uh yeah, about that. It looks open to me.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:55, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
* Editing is closed right now. We couldn't ever edit it anyway... I guess this will at least garner a video soon. [[User:Isarko|Isarko]] 07:44, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
** I'm excited to see what kind of tard rage he'll express about these events if he does make a video. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 18:24, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
**I'm thinking he'll complain that he already said that he would remove Simonla. Given how much he disliked the ads, I think its safe to say he had intentions of actually doing it. Its fully within his rights of course, but I think Evan should have waited around for another few days for Chris to actually do it. If he hadn't closed the site then theres a good chance that Simonla would be killed off by tomorrow. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 23:09, 6 February 2010 (UTC)

== Hijacked by Pirates? ==

It would seem that trying to visit the CWCipedia redirects to some online pirate game.
Should we add this? Also, Expect much rage from Chris. [[User:ExplodingSims|ExplodingSims]] 04:35, 9 February 2010 (UTC)

:This is an unexpected twist. Yarr.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:38, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
:Methinks the Chandler household suffered a power outage as a result of the massive blizzard our region just had. I don't think our Chris-chan would rage-quit this easily. Or, he died shoveling snow... [[User:Isarko|Isarko]] 04:47, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
*A power outage wouldn't have taken out the site and redirected it to pirates. Something's up and I'm afraid that he might ragequit because of this.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 05:07, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
** I was under the impression that ''we'' were the ones that did that, and this is just another attempt to lure him out, just like the Asperchu Ads were. The power outage would explain why he hasn't been around since last weekend. Sorta. [[User:Isarko|Isarko]] 05:14, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
** Still, I worry that Chris will see that the site is gone and think "OH NO TROLLS GOT IT oh well I have to move on" and quit. Plus, part of the appeal of the CWCipedia is the "unhackable site" thing it has going. If Chris convinces himself that this wasn't a perfectly legal cease and desist, he'll lose faith in the sysop.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 05:20, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
** I've been fearing the same thing I mean this might just push him to the point where he gives up and we'd lose all our fun.
** I doubt Chris would just quit. He'd make some butthurt video and move on. He'd still make videos. It would be sad to lose the CWCipedia though, that's like 60% of the fun.
** I just don't want to risk the chance of it happening. I say it be given back to him but with him showing simonla dying in the most painful way possible in the comic as a condition.[[User:Shawths|Shawths]]
:::*Guys, please, [[CWCki:NOTAFORUM|CWCki is not a forum]]. There's other places to discuss the implications of this. In practical terms, however, Clyde (should) have a backup of CWCipedia so all the content can be archived here.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:36, 9 February 2010 (UTC)

== Backups ==

[http://www.megaupload.com/?d=NDPLW1Q4 Here] and [http://www.mediafire.com/?glfzwlivnnu here]. Everything here needs to be archived here on CWCki, srsly. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:48, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

I'd rather give it back to Chris once he repents and all that.

== Since Chris has found CWCki ==

If he reads this article and figures out CWCipedia's actual purpose, he will probably abandon it. Should action be taken? [[User:Xentrilus|Xentrilus]] 02:17, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
*not sure. i'll discuss it with champthom, i'd like for this site to be all truth, but at the same time... chris might actually read it for once --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 02:20, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
*CWCipedia is mostly his only outlet for his material. At best he keeps on posting, at worst the whose site became an annex to the CWCki. We need to back-up everything we have about Chris in case of a partyvan show-up. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 02:22, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
* [http://cogsdev.org/cwcki/Special:Export] + [http://cogsdev.org/cwcki/Special:PrefixIndex] = backups --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 02:23, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
**What if we just rename and replace the pages Chris is asking for us to delete? He would think it's deleted but it's just temporally replaced. I don't know if we could do that, but it may work. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 02:28, 11 March 2010 (UTC)
I think the edits I made are suitable to mask our intentions. I'm not taking any risks. Let's delete this conversation ASAP, we're operating on borrowed time.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 02:27, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

A message to the Trolls

2010-03-11T01:37:57Z

Loserbrain:

{{tardrage}}
'''A message to the Trolls''' (video name: '''A message to the Trolls.MOV''') is a video Chris uploaded on 10 March 2010. In it he is angry at trolls for interfering with his life, however he did not mention whether this was about Bob or his new sweetheart, [[The Wallflower]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = A message to the Trolls.MOV
| image = {{#ev:youtube|zBXMu2zPL04}}
| Stardate = 10 [[March 2010]]
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = {{Rumors}} Rumors, {{Galpals}} Galpals
| Performance Style = {{Tragedy}} Tragedy
| Shirt = [[Image:Jokershirt.png]] The Joker
| previous = [[Surfshack Tito]]
| next = '''Current'''
}}

==Transcript==
This message is for every last god damned troll that has been pestering me for the past number of years, even the recent ones. I have been in a number of moments finding peace and losing it later. Because YOU WON'T LET ME BE!

You are su- You are a bunch of damn immature DUMBASSES who have no lives of your own.

You don't want me to have a little life of my own, you don't want me to find long-lasting peace and happiness for myself, you don't want me to find the whole true love for myself because you are so [[Chris and Ego|sub-absorbent]] yourselves, you don't wan- you only want me to give you more got-dang stories and [[Chris and art|art]] then I can give because of my... inspiration comes in and out and it mostly comes in when I'm happy and have peace.

You are nothing but goddamn greedy, impatient, unloved and [''shows the [[Claw of Fail|claw]]''] corrupted fools. Heartbreaks and heartaches, they really hurt. I let you all done so much whatever you want emotionally than me.. but.. it's another GOD DAMNED STORY WITH YOU TRYTA HURT MY FRIENDS AND GET THEM INVOLVED LIKE YOU'VE BEEN DOING [''Chris punches the camera'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Surfshack Tito]]|nextlink=Current|}}
{{Troll Videos}}
[[Category:Videos]]

Talk:The Wallflower

2010-03-11T01:29:53Z

Loserbrain:

List of phrases Chris copied from media

2010-02-03T15:20:32Z

Loserbrain:

It is no secret that Chris spends a [[Chris and health|healthy]] portion of his day watching Television shows. His preferences become apparent not only because he will constantly force you to listen to him talk about them, but also because Chris, in his infinite [[Chris and copyright|originality]] likes to take phrases and sentences from shows and use them word by word in his everyday [[Chris and English|speech]]. This article attempts to list all of these occurences, especially those he has used repeatedly.

==The phrases==

; Family Guy/The Cleveland Show/American Dad
<blockquote>
Blocky low resolution 
Source: When referring to Asperchu's inferiority, e.g. [[Mailbag 41]], [[Mailbag 42|42]], [[Mailbag 43|43]] and [[Mailbag 45|45]] 
Origin: Family guy's "Road to the Multiverse" episode 

Grinds my gears 
Source: The [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality Cwcipedia page on homosexuality], [[Mailbag 2]] 
Origin: Family guy's "Road to the Multiverse" episode 
</blockquote>

; Rocko's Modern life
<blockquote>
Bad luck and extreme misfortune 
Source: Describing the effects of the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] 
Origin: The Fortune Cookie episode. Filburt's fortune cookie reads "Bad luck and extreme misfortune will infest your pathetic soul for all eternity" 
</blockquote>

; Dragonball
<blockquote>
Kamehameha 
Source: [[Parody|The inspiration]] for Chris's finishing move, the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] 
Origin: It's probably the most famous attack from the show

Talk:Mitch Sonichu

2010-01-25T04:17:01Z

Loserbrain: /* Merge */

Aren't Mitch Sonichu and Mitch Chu supposed to be the same person? --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 21:30, 23 January 2010 (UTC)

==Merge==
I really think we can either 1) add this to the [[Asperchu]] article or 2) add this to the [[List of Sonichu characters]]. Yes, it's a hot topic but that doesn't mean it needs its own article. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:49, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

*Nah. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 05:25, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

*It's so pathetic I reckon it does! --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 03:24, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

*While in the Asperchu comics he may have a more important role, in the Sonichu story arc he hasn't been proven important or useful enough to have a whole page for him. --[[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 04:16, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Mitch Sonichu

2010-01-25T04:16:37Z

Loserbrain:

Aren't Mitch Sonichu and Mitch Chu supposed to be the same person? --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 21:30, 23 January 2010 (UTC)

==Merge==
I really think we can either 1) add this to the [[Asperchu]] article or 2) add this to the [[List of Sonichu characters]]. Yes, it's a hot topic but that doesn't mean it needs its own article. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:49, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

*Nah. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 05:25, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

*It's so pathetic I reckon it does! --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 03:24, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

*While in the Asperchu comics he may have a more important role, in the Sonichu story ark he hasn't been proven important or useful enough to have a whole page for him. --[[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 04:16, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N

2010-01-15T07:08:51Z

Loserbrain:

'''What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N''' was uploaded by Chris on 14 [[January 2010]]. He sings once again, performing his own variation of a "Mr. Plow Remix" that featured in a recent The Simpsons 20th Anniversary special, about how he is Christian Chandler. He proves that he cannot play the Harmonica at all, making his [[Mailbag 21#Chris has something in common with Billy Joel|statement]] in the [[mailbag]] yet another [[lie]].

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N
| image = {{#ev:youtube|mT3OO8Jo9z4}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 14 January 2010
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Comedy.png]] Comedy
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Music.png]] Music
| Shirt = [[Image:Advicedogshirt.png]] [[Advice Chris|Advice Dog]]
| previous = [[14 January 2010]]
| next = [[What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N|Current]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===

Well, with indebted gratitude to Mr. Matt Groening and Mr. Moby, here's my version of that song with my name on it.

[''Chris raps along with Moby's music video, changing lyrics to [[Chris_and_his_Ego|insert himself into the song]].'']
<poem>
Say, what's the name?
[[Christian Weston Chandler|Christian Chandler]]
What's that name?
Christian Chandler
What's the name?
Christian Chandler

[[Autism|C-H-I-S-C-H-A-N]]!

Say, what's the name?
Christian Chandler

You don't need to worry,
[[Chris and art | I'm drawing here]]
Drawing in color,
With my pen and marker!

My [[Bob | papa]] was chicken,
And named me Christian Chandler
Afternoon before the sunrise,
I have a new page for you,
Open your eyes
New plots are a big surprise
[[Lie | The hand drawn art is quality,
And that's no lie]]

What's the name?
It's Christian Chandler
</poem>
[''Chris briefly plays what he thinks is the melody on his harmonica, failing hard.'']

One, two, three!
<poem>
Say, what's the name?
Christian Chandler
What's that name?
Christian Chandler
What's the name?
Christian Chandler
</poem>
[''Chris resumes playing the harmonica.'']

[''Chris stops playing and is silent while Lisa Simpson, in Moby's video, ironically says, "Promise to never do that again."'']

Aw'right.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[14 January 2010]]|nextlink=[[What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N|Current]]|}}
{{Music Videos}}
[[Category:Music_Videos]]

Talk:Megan E-mails

2010-01-12T09:21:39Z

Loserbrain:

Just need to wikify this page. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:05, 12 September 2009 (CEST)

Added this to the [[E-mails]] page. --[[User:Spandam-sama|Spandam-sama]] 00:27, 23 September 2009 (CEST)

I think there is an error in this page and the content seems to be repeated, but I'm not really sure about that. Anyone can confirm? [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 09:21, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

Homos

2010-01-05T07:03:08Z

Loserbrain:

{{quote|Homo males are objectionable, VERY objectionable (I hate them!)|Chris}}

[[Image:Homobad.jpg|thumb|'''STAY STRAIGHT!''']]

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] refers to '''homosexual people''' almost exclusively by the pejorative term "'''homos'''". He doesn't like them very much.

From the very beginning of his internet fame in [[2007]], his extreme opposition to homosexuality and his neurotic, obsessive demand that everyone [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"STAY STRAIGHT"]] have been the subject of many [[lulz]] and the target of many [[trolls]].

==Fear of being a homo==
[[Image:0067-Christian&Barbie.jpg|thumb|Chris tried to stay straight from an early age, by posing with Barbie.]]

{{quote|"Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."|Chris <ref>E-mail to Megan, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*:; Date: Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm</ref>}}

[[Image:What_Chris_thinks_he_looks_like.png|thumb|Chris shows his [[Rainbow|true colors]].]]
Chris's homophobia is just that: he is literally afraid of homosexuality and of anything that could conceivably cause a straight person to be "leered off the straight path." His terror is such that he can barely bring himself to even utter the word "gay" or any other term concerning gay people, except of course for "homo". He has said that he cannot even look at a picture of a [[pickle|penis]] without being "freaked out," and he has cited [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|several techniques]] he believes are necessary to maintain his sexual attraction to women. Chris is also convinced that chances of homosexuality are raised as a direct result of not engaging in heterosexual intercourse before maturation,<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Dating_Education</ref> his retarded [[Dating Education]] classes naturally being the reasonable solution to preventing people from becoming homos. His attitude could be explained by one of three possibilities:

# Chris is a heterosexual idiot, so he thinks the slightest thing could turn him gay unless he maintains constant vigilance.
# Chris is a repressed homosexual, so he ''knows'' the slightest thing could turn him gay, because he can barely resist the temptation.
# Chris is bisexual, yet his underdeveloped mind fails to grasp the fact that there's actually such a thing as male bisexuality, so he thinks that people really ''can'' choose their sexual preference, and that giving in to his feelings towards other males will automatically turn him gay.

We don't yet have enough information to determine which of these is true, and we won't until he kisses a man on the lips (currently scheduled for [[2010]]). Of course we have to consider (because Chris won't) the small point that anyone, gay or straight, man or [[China|woman]], white or [[Niggo|black]], would most likely rather clean their genitals with sandpaper than touch Chris.

==Hatred of homos==

Chris's animosity towards gay people seems to result primarily from his fear of them and their supposed ability/desire to make him gay (this, despite the fact that women are likely jealous of the fact that men don't have to worry about Chris being attracted to them). He has often characterized the [[trolls]] as homos, which is either a basic ''ad hominem'' attack or a sincere belief that anyone who draws penises on [[Rosechu]] must be gay.

Notably, in [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC chat]] from 02 January 2009, Chris made this statement:
{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"|Chris, 02 January 2009, 11:59}}

He added that gay men should be incarcerated in co-ed prisons with other female offenders and be provided with access to prostitutes, arguing that they would come out "reprogrammed" into healthy, law-abiding heterosexuals.

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|February 18 2009]], Chris issued a retraction of his previous homophobic remarks and declared that he respects "the gay people" like he respects his [[gal pals]] and his [[sweethearts]]. However, this was mostly done at the insistence of [[Julie]]; by [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|March 10]] Chris was reciting verses from the Bible to justify his position against homos.

On 14 June 2009, he created a video called [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], which in the Chris-chan tradition of ruining everything you ever loved is a homophobic version of Uncle Ruckus's song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from the pilot episode of "The Boondocks."

Later on in the day, he published an apology for the video called "[[I'm Sorry, Dude]]", and insisted that he likes gays who "ac—...accomplish other things, like Stephen Fry who was a homosexual, but y'know he did a good job being a narrator on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''." This is, of course, displays Chris' ignorance, as Stephen Fry is also a famous actor, comedian, writer, narrator (on things other than LBP), and author of some extremely witty and charming blogs that have a large internet following, as well as being an advocate for gay rights. This apology was only posted for the sake of his [[gal pal]] Kim's boyfriend, whose gay brother apparently lost both his arms in Iraq.

Curiously, Chris goes out of his way to state that the children of Sonichu and Rosechu are watched over by [[Heather Iglesias]], whom he characterizes as "a pretty, trustworthy, good natured Spanish Lesbian." He further mentions that Heather keeps her sexuality a secret from the kids at the request of Sonichu himself. It is unknown why Chris mentions this, given that he has vacillated wildly in the past in his feelings on lesbianism, sometimes [[Mumble 1|coming out in support]] and other times [[CWC "Boyfriend"|condemning it]], or why the character is both Hispanic and a lesbian.

Chris occasionally tries to say he respects homosexuals for who they are. However, he repeatedly betrays his intolerance of different lifestyles, often within the same statement.

{{quote|"I personally respect the individual people as fellow human beings, and I am cool with associating with them as acquaintances and friends, but Please Do Not Wave Around what you do behind closed doors around me; NOBODY CARES TO KNOW; I PERSONALLY DO NOT CARE TO KNOW. Even within my imagination, I Do Not Care to even have the pictures Randomly Pop up in my head."|Chris <ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality</ref>}}

Because it's OK for him to wave around his degenerate sexuality and showcase real life pictures of his disgusting activities, but god forbid a well-adjusted male adult mention they love other men.

On 8 July, Chris left a comment on a PSN News Post in reference to a Unity avatar:<ref>http://blog.us.playstation.com/2009/07/attention-fighting-fans-prove-youre-the-best-around/</ref>
{{quotebox|Hey, the Street Fighter Tourney is good news, but I have a concern about the person who left the message.

His Avitar…

If that icon is WHAT I THINK IT IS, I AM OFFENDED; please change your Avitar, dude.}}

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 26, 2009|July 26 2009]], Chris goes so far as to call gay a synonym for stupid.

In the mailbag section of the [[CWCipedia]], Chris describes at length his idea for his comic self to travel to the future, where scientists have successfully isolated the "homo gene" (an idea stolen from [[Wikipedia:Family_Gay|this episode of]] [[Family Guy]]). They have not, however, isolated the "straight gene", and are only able to when Chris donates his own blood (Chris has once remarked that [[Honor roll|homosexuality could be cured by injecting blood from straight men into homosexuals]], or by imprisoning gays in [[Rape|co-ed prisons]]). Chris intended to bring at least two syringes of the solution back, one for [[Reldnahc]], and the other for emergencies (likely to be used on either himself, [[Magi-Chan]], or [[Megagi]]). Thanks to Chris's crippling insecurity about his sexuality, when this storyline finally came to light in [[Sonichu 10]], Chris amended this plan to not only bring back a couple of syringes, but also enough of the "cure" to turn every gay person on Earth straight.

Spoiler: because Chris is straight as a circle (as shown [[Homos#Evidence_that_Chris_is_a_homo|here]]), the vaccine would fail to work anyway.

Recently, [[Jack Thaddeus]] purchased advertisement space on the [[CWCkipedia]] to put up two ads on the site. One of them was an ad featuring Peter Griffin of Family Guy, pointing out that he and his creator, Seth MacFarlane, were supportive of gay rights. In retaliation, Chris blew his stack, [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|stating]]:

{{quote|I understand you getting paid to run ads in that box on the Cwcipedia. I feel okay with Vivian's Audiobooks, BUT I feel OFFENDED with the Mexico Contest and Gay-Rights Ads. The Pickle on the Mexico ad reminds me of a terrible time in my past with Pickle-Suited TROLLS, and '''I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLES and FOR STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUALITY.'''

Please Remove, or Change the Images of, THE TWO ADS.

And in the future, if you plan on adding more advertisements, INCLUDING the associated images, Please run them by me in a message for my personal Approval BEFORE you start running the ads.

Thank you.|Chris, [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User_talk:WikiSysop#The_New_Ad-Links]}}

On Christmas Day, 2009, the Sysop at the CWCipedia added a Twitter onto the webpage. Two days later, Chris saw this and flew into a tizzy, wanting the Twitter off as he didn't want any "homo trolls" talking behind his back.

Around New Year 2010, Chris replaced Jack Thaddeus's gay-friendly ads with ads for [[wikipedia:Love In Action|Love In Action]] (an "ex-gay" ministry), ProtectMarriage.com (a site promoting [[wikipedia:California Proposition 8 (2008)|Proposition 8]]), and a site that calls for a boycott on Pepsi due to their gay-friendliness. In another ad, he also suggested that ''[[wikipedia:Avatar (2009 film)|Avatar]]'' was a ''totally'' straight film. To sum it up: Ex-gay campaigns, Proposition 8 and ridiculous consumer boycotts — in one fell swoop, Chris managed to put in three big things that do ''not'' win himself any gay friends whatsoever and prove all of his previous "respect" for gays is nothing but idle words. The LGBT community has yet to decide what the hell to make of ''Avatar'', though.

On December 5th, Chris responded a [[mailbag]] letter addressing the homosexual subject. In the answer, Chris stated that [[Magi-Chan]] keeps a constant psychic-surveillance to ensure that there are no homos in CWCville. When founded evidence of homosexuality in a couple, the people involved would be arrested and fined heavily. It is worth noticing that, like Chris, good chaps like Hitler and Mussolini had a similar approach when addresing the homosexual lifestyle. Chris also apparently fails to notice that by having Magi-chan constantly reading people's mind would infringe the most important and basic of human's rights: the right of freedom of thinking.

==Evidence that Chris is a homo==
[[Image:564Homos.jpg|thumb|left|At least Chris doesn't [[fail]] at cataloguing pictures. [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality No, it's not a shoop].]]
[[Image:CWCMonica.jpg|thumb|Oh lawd, is dat some lipstick on Chris?]]

{{quote|First off, should such images [of men's asses] enter your mind at random, just stop yourself. I have had this problem too. I would take all such images when they enter my mind and just delete them; I imagine, in my mind, rolling them all into a ball, shrinking it down, and tossing them into a garbage can that links to my Stomach through a direct bodily vein. I imagine the feeling of it falling through the vein and making its splash landing into the stomach acid and dissolving; gone forever.|Chris admitting he's had homoerotic fantasies, [[Mailbag 4]]}}

[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|Fun fact: [[rainbow]] colors are the internationally recognized colors for the gay pride movement.]]
[[Image:Sonichuballs.jpg|thumb|For someone who claims to be straight, Chris sure does love talking about BALLS. Also, balls are touching.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|That's one [[pickle|phallic]] [[Lego]] tower you're building there, Chris.]]
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]
[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|Ironically, the harder Chris tries to convince people he's straight, the more gay he appears.]] He has absolutely no awareness that an uptight, milquetoast, squeaky-voiced man saying "I am straight! I have a subscription to ''Playboy''!" every five minutes looks like he has something he's trying to hide. Furthermore, the more we learn about Chris, the more gay he really appears to be.

* He owns, or at least has owned, anal beads and a vibrator, and he is on record as having experimented with putting both toys in his anus. In a chat during the [[Vanessa Saga]] on 16 [[April 2009]], he claimed that he no longer shoved things up his ass, except for "a narrow jet of water from my adjustable shower-head on a hose". Although it is quite possible to stick things up your butt and still be straight, people who are terrified of being turned gay generally do not do this.

* Christian argues that the vibrator and anal beads were sent to him as a free gift with an order of straight pornography; he did not ask for them or pay for them. However, according to [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|the receipts]] that were uncovered by trolls, Chris specifically asked for the anal beads as a free gift.

* Chris gets upset that people know he has the vibrator and anal beads, and he gets upset that people think he's gay because he kept the vibrator and anal beads... but he never gets upset that the store sent him the vibrator and anal beads in the first place. You would think that if a troll sent him a dildo he'd be throwing a fit about it on [[YouTube]], but no.

* Chris kept the vibrator around for months.

* In the [[Chris Sex Logs]], Chris shows off a dildo to [[PandaHalo]]. He immediately suggests the phallic sex toy is something [[Sex_Logs#This_is_my_dildo|goes up your butt]], and then [[Lie|immediately denies it's been up his butt]]. He also says having a dildo in your butt "will feel good."

* He collects [[My Little Pony]] figures well into early adulthood. 'Nuff said.

* For a straight man, he does [[Semen#Transcript|guzzle a lot of cum]]. Likewise, the idea of [[Kacey Phone Call|licking his own semen]] off of one of his gal-pals sexually arouses him.

* Like many gay men, most of his [[gal-pal|"friends"]] were female and he never slept with any of them.

* In a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN Chat with Julie]], Chris admitted that he randomly has images of penises (his own and others he's seen in porn) pop into his head. He also claims to hear voices in his head that say "Christian is gay." Unless Chris is having ''very specific'' auditory hallucinations, it's likely he has homoerotic daydreams and freaks out about it. In the same chat he sounded ''delighted'' describing the first time he saw semen in a porno movie as a teenager.

* Christian has stated that if he were unable to stay straight he would undergo sex reassignment surgery; he would rather be female than gay. It should be noted that 99.9999999999996% of straight men never, ever, put this much thought into this hypothetical dilemma.

* On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009|February 05 2009]] Chris posted two videos stating that he was coming out of the closet as a gay man. He later issued a retraction which was far less persuasive.

* When negotiating for the safe return of his PSN account from [[Max]], Chris was given the choice of burning his [[medallion]] or shoving it up his ass. Chris immediately chose to shove it up his ass.

* Chris thought a straight woman would be turned on by a [[nudes|closeup picture of his anus]].

* He wears a pink [[Belt Buckle of Fail|belt buckle]].

* He owns a set of [[Anime Wings]] which are basically hair clips. And hair clips are for women.

* Chris says he is the [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 9th, 2009|King of All Cosmos]], with the Cosmo being the pink drink originating from San Francisco associated with ''Sex and the City'', and gay men everywhere. Additionally, the namesake Katamari character not only vomits rainbows as a mode of transportation, but wears open-chested shirts and colorful tights that show off his Liefeld-esque MASSIVE AREA.

* His best man at [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|his wedding]] is [[Sarah Hammer]] in drag.

* [[Axe]], frequently used by gay men, is Chris's grooming product of choice.

*He sang "I Love the Nightlife" on his [[Chris's Big Night Out|visit to a local bar/restaurant]], which is a song with large gay following.

* [[Christian_and_the_Hedgehog_Boys_(album)|Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] features two covers of the Backstreet Boys , one cover of a [[Britney Spears]] song and one cover of a Ricky Martin song. This music was popular among 13 year old girls when it was new and is popular among the gay community today.

* Chris sure talks a lot about things "out his ass," such as "lying out [his] ass" when saying "''[[BILLY MAYS]] IS THE NEW MAYOR OF CWCVILLE.''"

* [[muscle bra|He wears a bra.]]

* He implores men to wear [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|muscle bras]] because looking at shirtless men makes Chris uncomfortable, possibly arousing latent homosexual urges.

* He saved a [[No More Jokes|homoerotic image]] to his computer, and then made a series of movies about it.

* When you look up "'''Homosexuality'''" in Chris's [[CWCipedia|own web encyclopedia]], you ''literally'' see his own portrait (as shown on the screencap on the right).

* Note that [[CWCipedia]] has a quite lengthy article on [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality Homosexuality], while not even having one on [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Rosechu Rosechu].

* In the [[PS3 History Level|PS3 History Level]] video, he showed that he actually owns a copy of ''Sex and the City: The Movie'' (which has a huge gay following) when he showcased his then current collection of [[PS3]] games and movies.

* While narrating the [[Sonichu_Powerpoint|Sonichu Powerpoint]] Chris called PandaHalo his "partner," a term sometimes used by gays and lesbians to refer to the person they're dating.

* In his response to a letter in [[Mailbag 4]] about "impure" homoerotic thoughts, Chris confesses that he "[has] had this problem too," and has to resort to deleting them through a curious process that involves tossing them into a garbage bin inside him, lest the gay gene take its toll.

==Defenses against becoming homo==
[[Image:CWCIsSTRAIGHT.jpg|thumb|According to Chris, heterosexuals defend their sexuality by taping index cards indicating their straightness to their shoes (while stomping on [[vibrator]]s). Srsly.]]

It's hard work for a warrior of true love and honesty to stay straight. Luckily, Chris has a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] which he stares at everyday to stave off his temptations of homosexuality.

Chris also subscribes to ''Playboy'' to help keep himself straight. You can tell he's straight because when he's explaining what he finds attractive in women it only takes five minutes for him to get around to boobies and [[China|vaginas]].

When homosexual (or potentially homosexual) [[trolls|fans]] sent Chris questions on the [[CWCipedia]] asking for tips to STAY STRAIGHT, Chris tends to offer what essentially amounts to self-brainwashing. Some of his ideas include thinking of naked women and how awesome they are, and imagining being struck by painful lightning whenever a homosexual thought occurs. He also clarifies that one need not buy their own [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail]]: any poster featuring attractive women (preferably in bikinis and looking sexy) will do the trick.

To prevent future homos, he also encourages women to not drink, smoke, or be physically abused while pregnant because he believes this could cause the baby to be born homosexual {{cite}}

In [[Kill De Jack]], Chris reveals another one of his defences against becoming a homo: he covers a section of his "[[CWC-ism|computer]]" (we can assume that he means "computer screen") with a piece of paper so that he can browse [[CWCipedia]] without looking at [[Jack Thaddeus]]'s ads featuring pictures of homosexual men.
{{clear}}

==Chris on his alleged homosexuality==

<center>{{#ev:youtube|SocBW0DsOn4 }}</center>

[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]]]

*''"I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT! I WILL NOT BE VEERED INTO ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!!!"''<ref>[[Masturbating and squirtin']]</ref> 

*''"I'M STRAIGHT! I'M STRAIGHT! '''YOU'RE THE HOMOS!''' EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref> 

*''"I'm straight, don't doubt me!"'''<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref> 

*''"Listen, as hard as you fucking can, [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|I CAME OUT OF MY]] AUTISTIC [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|CLOSET]] AS A STRAIGHT MAN, and NOTHING ELSE. SO YOU IMMATURE JERKS CAN JUST FUCK OFF."'''<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref> 

*''"Yep, you heard me. I am...a [[gaybian|gaaaaaaaaay...bian]]."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the First Video]]</ref> 

*''"Anyway the, uh--anyway so, to get to the point...fine. I'm guhh. I'm gaaaay. I'm gaay. I said it...OK. Yep. So...did I really come out of the closet there? That just depends on y'all--how y'all understand it."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the Second Video]]</ref>

*''"And look at me. Do I look like-- [shakes head in disagreement] '''No more of those stupid acquisition messages!''' Get it through your fucking, individual, damn, dirty, SKULLS! '''I. Am. STRAIGHT!'''"''<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts]]</ref>

Alternatively, you could just read Chris defending his straightness for the umpteenth time on [[CWCipedia]].

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Homosexuality}}

* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Chris and religion]]
* [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
* [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
* [[Gay 4 Sonichu]]
* [[Gaybian]] (a "male lesbian", according to Chris)
* [[It's UGH!]]
* [[Rainbow]]
* [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyO3pnkI3H4 CWC(Ian Brandon Anderson) finally admits it]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE9hdbiwA3k Chris-Chan is sick of the lies!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOpGtblij8Y Chris-Chan proves those slanderous trolls wrong]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Homos]]

User:Loserbrain

2010-01-05T01:07:46Z

Loserbrain: Created page with 'Loserbrain is alive. Sort of.'

Loserbrain is alive.
Sort of.