CWCki - User contributions [en]

Son-Chu

2011-07-27T12:53:36Z

Malpais:

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[File:Chrischanscar.jpg|thumb|When you see it, you'll ZAP TO THE EXTREME!]]

'''Son-Chu''' is Chris's [[1994]] [[Wikipedia:Ford Escort (North America)|Ford Escort]] [[Wikipedia:Station wagon|station wagon]].

While Chris, to put it mildly, obviously suffers from multiple "disconcerting" issues which are listed [[My Little Pony|elsewhere]] in this fine wiki, the [[Wikipedia:Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles|Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles]] has nevertheless given him full permission to drive a motor vehicle to be used in a plan to [[CWC's_Diary#June_2005|commit]] [[Sonichu Special 4|aggravated]] [[June062010.MOV|assault]]. The DMV has yet to release an apology for this grievous lapse in judgment by their Ruckersville department.

Members of the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]] believe that the fact that Chris drives a Ford Escort may be a universal symbol of romantic [[fail]]. Chris did not save up his [[Monthly Tugboat|tugboat]] for a vehicle, deciding he had more [[PSN|important]] things to spend his [[money]] on, despite the fact that sometimes a nice car equals [[china]]. Son-Chu is his mother, [[Barbara]]'s car.<ref name="Mumble 10">[[Mumble 10#Summary|Mumble 10]]</ref>

Unsurprisingly, Chris's parents pay for his gas.<ref name="Mumble 10"/>

==Backstory==
[[File:License.jpg|thumb|Much like James Bond, Chris also has a [[6 June 2010|license to kill]] (though through his ineptitude in operating a three-ton mobile weapon).]]
Since Chris jerks off to ''[[Transformers]]'', he pretends that his car is a Transformer named Son-Chu, "Proud Autobot Leader of the Cwcville, Virginia, Autobot Squad; he is also is my [[Fail|Cool]] [[Obesity|Sportin']], [[Carlos Chantor|Escortin' Car.]]"<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Son-Chu|Son-Chu}}</ref> From the [[CWCipedia]]:

{{quotebox|My Car is the Quick-Footed, well-armored '94 Escort; his name is Son-Chu. Dark Blue as Vehicle; he holds BatteryBlue/Yellow Combination Colors and Strong Personality under his hood. He has his Plasma Pistol/Energon Sword and Roof-Shield, and when [[Transformers|Decepti-Clones]] attack, he is the First to Show up to the Party and leading the [[Cwcville]] Autobot Defense Squad. When I'm not in the driver's seat, and he has to make his way to the fight, he projects my image in the Driver's Seat for the sake of his disguise.

Transformation Details: His Roof comes off his vehicle mode to make his Shield. His hood pops off to transform into his Plasma Pistol/Energon Sword.

**Stay Tuned to watch his Transformation in a few days.
}}

The reason why the car is named "Son-Chu" still remains unknown. The same can be said of all of Chris's other ''Transformers'' rip-offs, though.

==Handicap parking permit==
Being [[Autism|a high-functioning autistic male]], Chris has also been granted a handicap parking permit, clearly visible in the photographs of the car.

Chris should be thanking his lucky stars that he lives in one of only two states (the other being New York) in which you can get a disabled permit for being autistic. A quick [http://www.google.com/search?q=autism+disability+parking Google search] on the topic reveals that these permits are intended for the benefit of parents whose autistic children bolt into traffic or [[tard rage|go mental]] in the store. In Virginia, a doctor must sign off on the application for the original permit, but not on subsequent renewals<ref>[http://www.dmv.state.va.us/webdoc/citizen/disability/renewal.asp Virginia DMV]</ref>. Given this, it's likely that [[Barb]] applied for it when Chris was a child, and the family has kept the permit so long because their [[fat]], lazy asses can't be bothered to walk more than a few yards. Obviously, every second Chris leaves Son-Chu parked in a handicapped space so that he can loiter inside a business establishment is a second someone who actually can't walk more than a few yards can't park there to actually conduct business, not that Chris notices or cares.

The biggest question is, of course, this: who needs handicap permits when he's got a giant robot? If he can't find parking space, he could just level the parking lot. ''Duh.''

==Dashboard==
[[File:Cwchomersimpson.jpg|thumb|Homer, awaiting his ill gotten fate.]]
A Homer Simpson figurine resides on Chris's dashboard. There also appears to be a Sonichu-related item, possibly a paper cutout stuck to an air freshener ([[Chris and health#Hygiene|to mask the hobo stank]]), hanging from his rear-view mirror. Interesting to note is that [http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+46.2-1054 Virginia law prohibits the suspension of distracting or view-obstructing objects from the rear-view mirror of a car], a fact which most Virginia driver's-ed programs make very clear, but with Chris's [[Autism|high-functioning life]], he probably fell asleep during this part of the class.

==Vanity plate==
[[File:0655-CWCsSonichuLicense.JPG|thumb|The vanity plate, IRL (notice the [[autism]] and [[The GAMe PLACe]] bumper stickers, along with a [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]] license plate frame).]]
[[File:VanityPlateComic.jpg|thumb|The vanity plate, as seen from the [[Sonichu (comic)|comic]].]]
The [[Wikipedia:Vanity plate|plate]] reads "[[Sonichu (character)|SONICHU]]", thus ensuring no back-seat poontang for Chris. '''Ever.''' This habit of having a family plate stems from family. [[Bob]] has a vanity plate reading "UN4EVR" (apparently a statement of support for the U.N.) and "IB MR C" ("I be Mr. C," as in [[IBAChandler|I be Mr. Chandler]]) and [[Barb]] has one named "B WESTON" (as in Barbara Weston){{cite}}. It may be worth noting that Virginia has the highest vanity plate registration rate of any U.S. state, so Chris's family may simply be following a cultural norm.<ref>[[Wikipedia:Vanity_plate#North_America]]</ref>

Chris's plate is fashionably overlaid with a "[[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PIEDMONT VA CC]]" frame.

==Bumper stickers==
Chris's car features a number of ancient and faded [[Wikipedia:Bumper sticker|bumper stickers]]. Odds are they were applied when he first received the car, and have been rotting on the bumper ever since. Bumper stickers have long been regarded as a means to relay one's ill-informed world views, and prominently display meaningless platitudes for the public view. Chris's choice in stickers is a prime example of typical bumper sticker fare.

From left to right:

* [[Sonichu]] window static - A nearly invisible, transparent overlay in the back window of Chris's car. Most of the text is too faded to decipher, but it contains the URL for [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|the old Tripod website]], what appears to be a faded drawing of the disembodied heads of both [[Sonic]] and [[Sonichu]], and a very faint rendering of the ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' title text. They seem similar to the [[:File:197-cwcsonstecrd.jpg|ads in]] [[:File:163-cwcsonstecrdver2.jpg|the scrapbook]], but the logo is on the other side and the URL is bigger.
* [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] - A round red sticker. The remnants of Chris's ill-fated and ultimately useless attendance of the local community college.
* Plan 9 Music<ref>[http://www.plan9music.com/Home]</ref> - A bumper sticker for a local [[Chris and music|record shop]] where Chris probably gets his [[Britney Spears]] CDs from.
* An [[America]]n Flag - Incredibly faded and neglected. Text underneath the flag reads "United We Stand". Probably added in [[2001]], during a [[Twin Falling Towers|frenzy of patriotism]].
* "[[Autism]]. Work For A Cure." - As always, Chris feels the need to advertise his disability to the world.
* "[[Pedofork|Come Play With Me!]]" - Currently, the most disturbing thing Chris has on his car. It is an advertisement for [[The GAMe PLACe]]. We are sure that they [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|appreciate]] his [[6 June 2010|endorsement]].
* ???? - There are the completely faded and torn remnants of a sticker located on the center of Chris's bumper. It is unknown what resided there.

As of 25 [[October 2010]], it appears Chris has rearranged his sticker collection, seen in [[DayOut]]. The Plan 9 Music sticker remains in the same place; however, the American flag has been removed and replaced with a [[Wikipedia:Ichthys|Jesus fish]], a common symbol for identifying oneself as a [[Chris and Religion|Christian]]. "Come Play With Me!" has been replaced with a "Save [[McIntire Park]]" sticker. Since this is a first time we've seen Son-Chu in quite a while, it's so far impossible to determine when either of these changes were made.

==Car trouble==
Chris has wound up in dangerous situations with his car, usually of his own creation, on a few occasions.

On 22 [[June 2005]], during his encounter with the management of the Charlottesville [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]], Chris "nearly backed up onto" the store's [[Manajerk|manager]] towards the end of their argument. Given the way Chris describes the event (and his general unreliability as a witness), it's hard to say whether the near miss was intentional or accidental.

About a month later, on 25 [[July 2005]], Chris caused a minor fender-bender when he rear-ended a car he was following too closely. He was found to be at fault in the accident and ordered to pay $86 in fines and court costs.

During his famous run-in with [[Michael Snyder]] on 4 [[June 2010]], Chris attempted to flee the parking lot of [[The GAMe PLACe]] in his car, but wound up boxed-in by Snyder and a couple of nearby police officers. Snyder claimed that Chris had intentionally tried to run him over with his car, an accusation that Chris [[6 June 2010|loudly denied]]. Also likely is that Chris, due to his poor coordination skills and admitted intoxication, nearly ran him over by accident in a blind panic.

==Mechanical issues==
[[File:Oil Change due 4-5-09.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's absurdly overdue oil change.]]
Given the state of the [[14 Branchland Court|Chandler home and its surrounding yard]], it's unlikely the family takes any better care of their vehicles. Possibly the best look we got at Son-Chu's performance was in the [[DayOut]] videos. Every time the car is stopped at a traffic light or parked somewhere, the engine rattles loudly; this is likely caused by bent [[Wikipedia:Universal joint|U-joints]] (meaning Chris/Barbara probably hit a curb at some point) connecting the [[Wikipedia:Drive shaft|drive shaft]] to [[Wikipedia:Internal combustion engine|the engine]] and [[Wikipedia:Transmission (mechanics)|transmission]], and since Chris spends all his money on [[:Category:Things bought with taxpayer money|worthless shit]], a U-joint replacement would put him over budget. A [[Wikipedia:Pennzoil|Pennzoil]] sticker on the windshield states that the next recommended oil change was to take place on 5 [[April 2009]], over a year before the video was recorded; we also learn the virgin-mobile has at least 260,000 miles on it. At this point, it's a toss-up as to whether the car or [[Robert Chandler|Bob]] will go first.
{{-}}

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
File:Son-ChuVehicle.jpg|Side profile of the car. "[[Honor roll]]" my ass.
File:Son-ChuBot.jpg|The car in Transformer mode. Note how the mild-mannered Escort somehow grows the front end of a Dodge Viper.
File:Playstation Patrol W CWC's Car.JPG|Chris parks his car outside of his version of [[PS3|Mecca]].
File:MODNATION 1.JPG|Son-Chu in ''[[ModNation Racers]]''.
File:Modnation AutobotSon-Chu.jpg|Post-Beta
File:ModNation AutobotSonChu.jpg|Transformed version.
</gallery>
</center>

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia}}
* [[Car Pranks]]
* [[Hot Wheels]]

{{Relics of Fail}}

[[Category:Relics of Fail]]
[[Category:Transformers]]

ECV 00002

2011-07-25T21:14:59Z

Malpais: /* Transcript */

[[File:ChrisChanTechnologyMR.jpg|thumb|How Chris uses science and technology to achieve his ultimate transformation.]]
{{Quote|I was actually surprised on how my torso would look blue, then after I painted my face, before the headwear, I reminded myself of the Marvel superhero Nightcrawler|Chris to [[Jackie]]<ref>[[Jackie Chat 7]]</ref>}}

'''ECV 00002''' is a video uploaded on 10 [[October 2010]] in which [[Chris]] uses the power of [[Random Access Humor]] and jump cuts to transform into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|his Super-Mode]]. [[Jackie]] requested this video two days prior.<ref>[[Jackie Chat 6]]</ref>

The results are mixed; Chris at least attempts to use the same pose and positioning before and after the jump cut, but this baby step towards competence is overshadowed by a [[retard]]-fall back by the slip-shod cosplay self-paint job. An odd, incomplete white field over most of his face meant to resemble [[Sonic]]/[[Sonichu]]-style eyes, a cone-ear constructed out of construction paper (which regularly falls off, despite Chris's lack of movement), and a white "chest-fur" patch, which is supposed to be an outline of the [[Medallion of Fail]] only serve to further damage Chris's physical appearance.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00002
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Nr7zJTSBSF8}}
| stardate = 10 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = {{RedYellowStripeShirt|text}}, Body paint
| previous = [[A Hike]]
| next = [[100 2277]]
}}

{{quote|At least I am doing this and... I have myself a woman, so there.}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, folks! Hm. Well, [[Monty Python|and now for something completely different]]. [[Electric hedgehog]] power! PEW!

[''Jump cut. Chris is now dressed as [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]]. The transformation straightens his back, lowers and bends his arms, and moves a few items in the background'']

Pew. [''Chris-chan Sonichu's right ear begins to fall off''] This would be me in my super mode! [''Chris puts the right ear back on''] ...if I actually had the super powers! [''The right ear falls off yet again, but is put back in place''] [[Chris and reality|But I don't in real life.]] But I dressed up like this anyway, to, I don't know, [''The same ear falls off yet again, promptly readjusted''] just to say something or just to have fun.

Anyway, live an [[Honest content|honest life]], don't [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]], don't [[Chris_Drops_the_N-Bomb|badmouth people]]... It's just not cool. You know? Don't pic- don't torture me. At least I am doing this and... I have myself a woman, [[Chris and his Ego|so there]]. So she'll appreciate this very much. She appreciates almo- everything I do for her. [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|Especially these videos]].

[[Jackie]], I [[love]] you. I want to hold you in my arms, [[sweetheart]]. You come over right on here and we'll [[Chris and sex|do each other]] right. [[Sex_tape|Sweet times]]...

[''Pause.'']

Alright, anyway, stay in school, stay well... um... you know. Just live [[Chris and English|rife]] peace- live peacefully. Don't take- don't [[Chris and anger|be angry at people]]. Don't be mean. OK? A'ight. Take care.

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-chan Henshin
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MPeuSdTo0NI}}
| Maker = rba718
| Stardate = 10 October 2010
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = ELECTRIC HEDGEHOG POWER
| video = {{#ev:youtube|lDSQAmLPbw0}}
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]
| Stardate = 10 October 2010
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Sailor Chris-Chan's Ultimate Transformation
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4hTnkuWg1Z8}}
| Maker = ChristopherCooler
| Stardate = 11 October 2010
| Video Type = [[Sailor Moon]] remix
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-chan is a hypocrite
| video = {{#ev:youtube|IJoF_eA_lX8}}
| Maker = AnimuAnimalia
| Stardate = 12 October 2010
| Video Type =
}}

==Fan art==

<center><gallery>
File:Hpowers.jpg|Electric furry powers!
File:128678188337.png
File:128677654690.jpg
</gallery></center>

==References==
<references/>

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[A Hike]]|nextlink=[[100 2277]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

{{Cosplay videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category: Jacklyn's Naughty No Trick, All Treat, 31 Days of Halloween Contest| 2010-10-10]]
[[Category: Chris-chan videos, October 2010| 2010-10-10]]
[[Category: Jackie Saga videos| 2010-10-10]]

Anne Boleyn

2011-07-25T03:00:59Z

Malpais:

[[Image:Anne_boleyn.jpg|thumb|The ancestor of the man who gave birth to [[Sonichu]]? Though, it would explain why she was [[Mary Lee Walsh|called a witch]].]]

'''Anne Boleyn''' ([[Pre-1980#Pre-1900|c.1501/1507 – 1536]]) was Queen of England and [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|Ireland]] as the second wife of [[Wikipedia:Henry VIII of England|King Henry VIII]]. [[Chris]] claims to be a descendant of her from his [[Barbara|mother]]'s side of the family, via [[Daniel Weston]] who was supposedly on the [[Wikipedia:Mayflower|''Mayflower'']].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]]</ref>. Note that Chris [[Chris and English|cannot even spell "Boleyn"]].<ref>[[IRC (22 December 2008)]]</ref>

History buffs will of course notice a problem with this. Namely that, aside from the fact that [[Daniel Weston]] did not exist, Anne Boleyn had only one daughter, [[Wikipedia:Elizabeth I of England|Queen]][[Virgin with rage| Elizabeth]] [[Wikipedia:Elizabeth I of England|I]]. It is impossible for Chris to be descended from her, because Elizabeth was childless and was in fact famously known as the [[virgin with rage|virgin queen]].

It is not known when or how Chris got this idea. In August [[2005]], he tried to impress a girl on [[MySpace]] with this fact simply because she was interested in royalty.<ref>[[MySpace#Jalena]]</ref>

In late [[2008]], Chris deduced (or more likely decided) that he is also descended from [[Wikipedia:Mary Boleyn|Mary Boleyn]] (Anne's sister),<ref>[[IRC (22 December 2008)]]</ref> her brother [[Wikipedia:Richard Weston, 1st Earl of Portland|Richard Weston, 1st Earl of Portland]], born 1577),<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate May 3rd, 2009]]</ref> and later [[Wikipedia:Earl of Portland|Earls of Portland]].<ref name="IRC">[[IRC (31 December 2008)]]</ref> Chris had looked up Richard Weston and Mary Boleyn on [[Wikipedia]] to find a link between them.<ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref> This fact strengthens the view that Chris made the whole thing up himself without being told by his mother. And although it is quite possible that his family tree loops back in on itself, it's [[Virginia|probably]] a good deal more recent than the Tudor period.

In [[May 2009]], Chris also gave his ancestry as a reason for [[Wikipedia]] to have an article on him.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate May 3rd, 2009]]</ref>

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Daniel Weston]]
*[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]]
*[[Chandler Family Tree]]

{{People}}

[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]
[[Category:Dead]]

Christopher's name change

2011-07-25T02:49:28Z

Malpais:

[[Image:Bearsteinofficial.jpg|thumb|300px|right|Godbear|I am Godbear Almighty; walk before me and be blameless. No longer will you be called Christopher; your name will be Christian, for I have made you a father of [[CWCville|many nations]].]]

At age ten, Christopher Weston Chandler '''changed his name''' to [[Christian Weston Chandler]] as a result of events in December [[1992]]. His name was legally changed the following year. Given the significance Chris ascribes to his identity and his name, it's no wonder that he continues to consider this to be one of the most significant events of his life.

==Leonard Bearstein==

Chris credits his name change to "Leonard Bearstein," an animatronic bear in a musical program presented at shopping malls and other venues. The Leonard Bearstein Symphony Orchestra ([[wikipedia:Leonard Bernstein|I see what you did there]]) is still in operation to this day, running shows in North Carolina, Virginia, and elsewhere during the Christmas season. The Leonard character is designed to be fully interactive and engage in conversations with the audience via a human operator behind the scenes.<ref>[http://www.leonardbearstein.com/ Leonard Bearstein's website]</ref><ref>[http://www.facebook.com/pages/Leonard-Bearstein/205357189065 Leonard Bearstein has a Facebook FFS]</ref> During a shopping trip to [[Richmond]] in 1992, the Chandler family encountered the Bearstein show at Regency Square Shopping Mall. Chris was evidently fascinated by the spectacle, and due to the light turnout that day, he received considerable attention from the interactive bear. The performer operating Leonard asked Chris his name, and misheard "Christopher" as "Christian." Chris and his family seem to attribute this error to the Leonard's English accent, rather than the fact Chris was talking to a man over a microphone built into a robot bear.<ref>[[IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES]]</ref> For reasons understood only by him, Chris adopted the new name and insisted upon being called by it.<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992|Wikipedia autobiography]]</ref>

[[1993|On 29 December 1993]], the ''[[Wikipedia:Richmond Times-Dispatch|Richmond Times-Dispatch]]'' ran [[IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES|a fluff piece]] on the incident. The story drew a connection between Chris's experience with the bear and his successes in finding an [[autism]]-friendly school and winning the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]], and reported the family's decision to begin the legal process to rename him. It also quoted Chris's father [[Bob]] as admitting that he had wanted to name his son "Christian" to begin with, but had pussied out (although what he was afraid of remains unclear).<ref>[[IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES|Richmond Times-Dispatch article]]</ref><ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Christopher|Emily Date Conversation Transcript]], 52:22</ref>

==Significance today==
[[Image:Crystal.jpg|thumb|right|Who the hell is Christopher?]]
As even a cursory examination will reveal, Chris is fixated on his own name and events from his childhood. Thus an event which resulted in him having ''two'' names to obsess over is of supreme importance to him, even after almost twenty years. However, Chris routinely glosses over key details in the story--at times he will simply refer to "Christopher" or discuss being renamed by "a conducting Bear" as if no further context is required.<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]]</ref> For example, the [[troll|trolls']] first real insight into the event comes from this brief note in Chris's [[DVD]] slideshow:

{{quote|Before moving from Ruckersville to Richmond, in December of [[1989]], my family and I were watching the Regency Square Bear Band perform. When the Conductor asked me my name, I told him "Christopher", but apparently he was english, since he misunderstood me and called me "Christian". The name change settled in. Originally when I was born my father wanted to name me Christian, but he chickened out and named me Christopher.|Chris's note in his DVD Slideshow<ref>[[DVD Slideshow Transcripts]]</ref>}}

As seen here, even at age 25 Chris saw no need to explain why he would change his name at the behest of a total stranger, ursine or otherwise.

Chris's fixation on his identity came to the fore during the [[Liquid Saga]], when he was confronted with an impostor of himself. In his struggle to affirm his uniqueness in the universe, Chris reluctantly conceded that Liquid might truly share the name "Christian Weston Chandler," but clung to the idea that he and he alone was ''born'' Christopher Weston Chandler and later ''became'' Christian Weston Chandler. (This of course missed the point that [[Liquid|CChanSonichuCWC]] was not merely taking credit for Chris's accomplishments but was claiming to ''be'' the true and honest Christian, name change and all.) This became a recurring theme in Chris's videos at the time, as he would repeatedly cite his name change as something that the impostor could not possibly claim as his own.

Since Liquid and others were constantly accusing Chris of being an impostor named "[[Ian Brandon Anderson]]", Chris frequently asserted the authenticity of his name. However, the name change clouds the matter, and Chris could not even use a phrase like "my God-given name" without qualifiers:

{{quote|Call me by the real name that [[God]] and the bear has given me throughout my whole life.|Chris makes no sense, 6 [[August 2009]]<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref>}}

Along with Chris's tendency to refer to [[God and Jesus]] in the same breath (or even [[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions|the same word]]), this quote gave rise to the troll meme that Leonard Bernstein is an avatar of GodJesus, or perhaps GodBear.

==Christopher as a separate personality==

[[Image:Recent Activity.jpg|thumb|250px|"Christopher" in action]]

That Chris's preadolescence has a name unto itself seems to encourage Chris to treat "Christopher" as a former life. In his [[KCWC]] dedication special, Christian dedicated a song to Christopher and explained the distinction:

{{quote|Coming in at number five! It's a dedication to myself but also mainly to my pa-to my... to the one that was at my birth name: Christopher. Christopher Weston Chandler. Before the name change and all, he still lives in me in [[heterochromia|my one blue eye]]. And in my heart and soul. Cuz he is me, I am him.|Chris, 12 [[August 2009]]<ref>[[KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special#Part 4: #6 and #5]]</ref>}}

Shortly thereafter, Chris briefly tried to imply that Christian and Christopher were [[30 August 2009|split personalities]], going as far as faving [[gay]] [[pedophile]] [[anime]] videos on [[YouTube]] in the name of "Christopher"{{cite}}. However, he quickly abandoned the act, and later admitted that he made the whole thing up.<ref>[[Mailbag 4]]</ref>

Despite Chris's assertion that Christopher lives on in him, it would appear Christopher's spirit haunts the grounds at [[14 Branchland Court]], judging by the account of ace field agent [[JenkinsJinkies]]:

{{squote|I went over to [[Chris's house]] with a flashlight that Night. I'm trekking through the daylilly garden aisles, searching for more bad I can do about the house. When suddenly, I hears a voice, "Hello". I look around and see nobody. I am Terrified. Then suddenly, I am fucking paralyzed; my ankles and wrists are pulled to my left and right, feeling like there were other people's hands holding them down on a floor, and I feel a pair of hands on my Neck too;
strangling me, yet I can still breathe. Then the voice comes back, "Hello, Mr. [[Troll]]." It is the voice of a child, about 8 years old. I struggle to look around, yet I see nobody. I'm fuckin' [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shittin' my pants here]]. The voice continues, "Do not be afraid of me, like the teachers of the [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Elementary School]] were; they did not understand me and [[Autism|my mind]]. I want you to understand my mind..." Right after, I see a lot of strange images going through my mind. Including the images of an [[abusive babysitter]] called "Roache" locking me alone in a static room; a therapy session at [[James Madison University]]; the teachers, guidance counsoler and principal of Nathanel Greene Elementary School holding me down and taping my screams and more. I tried to scream, but Nothing came out; it was a Scream of Silence; I could not even utter a WORD in Normal Voice; Only Silence. [...] I have encountered the Spirits of Young Christopher Weston Chandler and [[Patti]], protecting the Chandler Household. I warn you all right here and now, Stay Away from his house, and Patti's Grave.|Jenkins reports on the Chandler household, 27 July 2010<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1068&highlight=#1068]</ref>}}

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:432CWCSNHP8.jpg|From the [[scrapbook]]
Image:0060-CWCNote1.jpg|From the [[DVD]]
Image:BearsteinbyChris.jpg|Bearstein performance in the Regency Sq. Mall
Image:Godbear.jpg|A challenger appeared, beware Raptor Jesus
Image:Bearsteinofficial.jpg
Image:Leonard Bernstein.jpg|[[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|No relation]]
Image:Angrybear.png
Image:GODBEARStrip.png|The TRUE and HONEST event. (Artist's Impression)
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Ricardo Weston Chandler]]
*[[Carlos Chantor]]

==Sauces==
<references />

==External links==
*[http://www.leonardbearstein.com/ Leonard Bearstein's website]
*[http://pqasb.pqarchiver.com/timesdispatch/access/615847621.html?dids=615847621:615847621&FMT=ABS&FMTS=ABS:FT Richmond Times - Dispatch article, 29 December 1993]
*[http://www.regencysquaremall.com/ Regency Square Mall site]

[[Category:Events]]