CWCki - User contributions [en]

Victory Rockout

2011-08-29T04:56:01Z

Marco:

'''Victory Rockout''' (originally called '''Skyrim Victory.mp4''') is a video uploaded early in the morning of 28 [[August 2011]] under the YouTube account "CWCvilleProductions". In this video, Chris flails around a ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' controller while dancing to a metal remix of [[Wikipedia:The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim|''The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim'']] theme. Chris completely disregards both the rhythm and structure of the original song, and just screams whatever pops in his mind in a vaguely musical manner. It appears to be created in response to [[Thorg]]'s retirement from [[Trolls|Trolling]], referencing [[Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada|Thorg's love for the Elder Scrolls]].

Chris once again complains about [[CWCki]]. He's likely taking an issue with the PS3 Tracker on the front page, which said (as of 28 August 2011) ''"Chris was last spotted playing Fallout: New Vegas. Chris has spent over $3,678.10 of YOUR money!"'' and is trying to hint that he's not spending ''that'' much money on video games. (It is worth noting that CWCki's numbers are on the conservative side.)

The video frequently skips and misses frames, which is most likely due to his [[PSEye]] being damaged ([[Chris and anger|again]]).

{{Infobox/video
| name = Victory Rockout
| video = {{#ev:youtube|41cBjmYezm8}}
| stardate = 28 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt =
| previous = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===
-eah we got victory! I won with a victory! Victory on all the cyber bullies! Cyberbullies gonna get their kickin', BAM BAM BAM! Bam! I kicked your head in, you damn dirty bullies! [''Strikes the air with his [[Gitar of Fail|guitar controller.]]] Whee!

You bullies are really, really stupid! Trolls are really, really stupid! Hey you bullies are really, really stupid! [[Random-access humor|Team Rocket]]'s stupid, you're stupid, you're stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, STUPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID!

Hello [[Ian Brandon Anderson|Ian]]! Why is your last name Brandon Anderson? [[Sex tape|JUUUUUULAAAYYYYYY!]]

BIZZAIIII!

Victory over the trolls! I'm also the creator of the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]! Yeah!
''[turns around and thrusts his ass towards the camera]'' So you can kiss it! Kit! Kiss it! Kiss it!

And I paid ten dollars for this guitar and game combo, at a garage sale a couple weeks ago! I only paid ten dollars FOR ''Fallout: Vegas'' when it was on sale a previous time!

Troll, you're so jinxed! A one thing for everything? INCORRECT!

The CWCki's a damn [[lie|lie!]] Ahhh.... Exaggerations! False implications! Naked Truths and a content plague inside contents!

Never trust the CWCki no matter what! [[Mailbag|If you ask questions, ask me d'personally!]] I will answer with [[Honest Content|honesty!]] All they tell you is exaggeration and lies! They're all internet bullies!

[[Death Threats|DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAD!]]

''[turns off camera]''

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]|nextlink=[[Victory Rockout|Current]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011]]

Victory Rockout

2011-08-29T04:52:54Z

Marco:

'''Victory Rockout''' (originally called '''Skyrim Victory.mp4''') is a video uploaded early in the morning of 28 [[August 2011]] under the YouTube name "CWCvilleProductions". As of now, whether Chris or someone else is under the name is unknown. In this video, Chris flails around a ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' controller while dancing to a metal remix of [[Wikipedia:The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim|''The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim'']] theme. Chris completely disregards both the rhythm and structure of the original song, and just screams whatever pops in his mind in a vaguely musical manner. It appears to be created in response to [[Thorg]]'s retirement from [[Trolls|Trolling]], referencing [[Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada|Thorg's love for the Elder Scrolls]].

Chris once again complains about [[CWCki]]. He's likely taking an issue with the PS3 Tracker on the front page, which said (as of 28 August 2011) ''"Chris was last spotted playing Fallout: New Vegas. Chris has spent over $3,678.10 of YOUR money!"'' and is trying to hint that he's not spending ''that'' much money on video games. (It is worth noting that CWCki's numbers are on the conservative side.)

The video frequently skips and misses frames, which is most likely due to his [[PSEye]] being damaged ([[Chris and anger|again]]).

{{Infobox/video
| name = Victory Rockout
| video = {{#ev:youtube|41cBjmYezm8}}
| stardate = 28 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt =
| previous = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===
-eah we got victory! I won with a victory! Victory on all the cyber bullies! Cyberbullies gonna get their kickin', BAM BAM BAM! Bam! I kicked your head in, you damn dirty bullies! [''Strikes the air with his [[Gitar of Fail|guitar controller.]]] Whee!

You bullies are really, really stupid! Trolls are really, really stupid! Hey you bullies are really, really stupid! [[Random-access humor|Team Rocket]]'s stupid, you're stupid, you're stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, STUPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID!

Hello [[Ian Brandon Anderson|Ian]]! Why is your last name Brandon Anderson? [[Sex tape|JUUUUUULAAAYYYYYY!]]

BIZZAIIII!

Victory over the trolls! I'm also the creator of the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]! Yeah!
''[turns around and thrusts his ass towards the camera]'' So you can kiss it! Kit! Kiss it! Kiss it!

And I paid ten dollars for this guitar and game combo, at a garage sale a couple weeks ago! I only paid ten dollars FOR ''Fallout: Vegas'' when it was on sale a previous time!

Troll, you're so jinxed! A one thing for everything? INCORRECT!

The CWCki's a damn [[lie|lie!]] Ahhh.... Exaggerations! False implications! Naked Truths and a content plague inside contents!

Never trust the CWCki no matter what! [[Mailbag|If you ask questions, ask me d'personally!]] I will answer with [[Honest Content|honesty!]] All they tell you is exaggeration and lies! They're all internet bullies!

[[Death Threats|DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAD!]]

''[turns off camera]''

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]|nextlink=[[Victory Rockout|Current]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011]]

Victory Rockout

2011-08-28T22:20:27Z

Marco: Might as well put in a little link to expose Chris's own lies.

{{Recent}}
'''Victory Rockout''' (originally called '''Skyrim Victory.mp4''') is a video uploaded early in the morning of 28 [[August 2011]] by the YouTube user "CWCvilleProductions". In the video, Chris flails around a ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' controller while dancing to a metal remix of [[Wikipedia:The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim|''The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim'']] theme. Chris completely disregards both the rhythm and structure of the original song, and just screams whatever pops in his mind in a vaguely musical manner. It appears to be created in response to [[Thorg]]'s retirement from Trolling, referencing Thorg's love for the Elder Scrolls.

Chris once again complains about [[CWCki]]. He's likely taking an issue with the PS3 Tracker on the front page, which said (as of 28 August 2011) ''"Chris was last spotted playing Fallout: New Vegas. Chris has spent over $3,678.10 of YOUR money!"'' and is trying to hint that he's not spending ''that'' much money on video games. (It is worth noting that CWCki's numbers are on the conservative side.)

{{Infobox/video
| name = Victory Rockout
| video = {{#ev:youtube|41cBjmYezm8}}
| stardate = 28 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt =
| previous = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===
-eah we got victory! I won with a victory! Victory on all the cyber bullies! Cyberbullies gonna get their kickin', BAM BAM BAM! Bam! I kicked your head in, you damn dirty bullies! [''Strikes the air with his [[Gitar of Fail|guitar controller.]]] Whee!

You bullies are really, really stupid! Trolls are really, really stupid! Hey you bullies are really, really stupid! Team Rocket's stupid, you're stupid, you're stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, STUPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID!

Hello [[Ian Brandon Anderson|Ian]]! Why is your last name Brandon Anderson? JUUUUUULAAAYYYYYY!

BIZZAIIII!

Victory over the trolls! I'm also the creator of the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]! Yeah!
''[turns around and thrusts his ass towards the camera]'' So you can kiss it! Kit! Kiss it! Kiss it!

And I paid ten dollars for this guitar and game combo, at a garage sale a couple weeks ago! I only paid ten dollars FOR ''Fallout: Vegas'' when it was on sale a previous time!

Troll, you're so jinxed! A one thing for everything? INCORRECT!

The CWCki's a damn [[lie]]! Ahhh.... Exaggerations! False implications! Naked Truths and a content plague inside contents!

Never trust the CWCki no matter what! If you ask questions, ask me d'personally! I will answer with honesty! All they tell you is exaggeration and lies! They're all internet bullies!

[[Death Threats|DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAD]]

''[turns off camera]''

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]|nextlink=[[Victory Rockout|Current]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011]]

Template:Da update

2011-08-24T00:59:15Z

Marco:

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
* 23 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris uploads [[Re-Calling Ahuvia|three]] [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David|new]] [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.|videos]], two of which calling out [[Jack Thaddeus]] once more and now [[BlueSpike]].
* 20 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris uploads a video singing about [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"|wristwatches]] dedicated to [[Thorg]].
* 16 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris uploads a [[Kaka_Makeup_Basics|6-minute video]] on how to apply makeup and [[Calling Out#Calling_Out_Jack_Thaddius_-_Ahuviya|a video]] giving information on Jack Thaddeus.
* 12 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris uploads a new [[Exposed_-_Jeremy_Slonwhite_of_Vancouver,_BC_Canada|video]] exposing Thorg early.
* 10 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris uploads [[Calling_Out#Re:_Don.2C_and_ReCalling_Out_.22Thorg.22_-_JeremyRe: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|two more]] [[Correction of EX relationship status|new videos]].
* 9 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris uploads [[Calling Out#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|two]] [[It's not that cold‎‎|new]] videos. [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] later [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|uploaded a video]] for Chris.
* 6 August: Chris reappears with [[Calling Out|three new videos]], threatening to reveal the true identities of Surfshack Tito and Thorg.
('''[[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|more...]]''')

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, namely new content. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 6 or 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

Calling Out

2011-08-24T00:54:28Z

Marco: Pretty much set up the basis for the two new blackmail videos.

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of six [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-16 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = '''Current'''
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ZNAvfPYODLI}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = '''Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David'''
}}

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|qh6q3JV2lEI}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = '''Current'''
}}

=== Transcript ===

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"

2011-08-21T01:08:10Z

Marco: Someone forgot the 3DS. XP

{{Recent}}

'''Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"''' is a video released by [[Chris]] on 20 [[August 2011]]. It is a bizarre ballad to wristwatches dedicated to Thorg. Chris shows off various wristwatches in his collection and flashes his [[PSP]], TV, and 3DS with images of wristwatches on them. Despite being barely over a minute in length, Chris quickly gets [[Obesity|out of breath]] while singing.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|yuaYqiOEB6c}}
| stardate = 20 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Unknown
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = Current
}}

==Transcript==
[''Chris spends the entire duration of this video showing various devices with pictures of wristwatches on them, most nostably a [[3DS Flipnote|3DS]] and a PSP attached to his wrists]''

[''brandishes an unopened Super Mario World-themed wristwatch'']

Here's a little somethin' dedicated to [[Thorg|Master Thorg]].

Wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, wrist, Nintendo-do wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, wristwatches! Wristwatches!

Wrist, wrist, Nintendo wristwatches! Wristwatches! ''[pause]'' Wristwatches!

Wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, Nintendo WRISTWATCHES! Wristwatchesss!

Wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, Nintendo wristwatches! Wristwatches!

Wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist-uh, wrist, wrist, Nintendo wrist-uh, wrist, wristwatches! Wristwatches! Wristwatches!

Wriiiiistwatches!

Wriist, wriist, Nintendo wriist, wriist, Nintendo wriist, wriist, Nintendo...WISTRATCHES!

Ba-da, ba-da BOOM!

Wristwatches, for Master Thor-''[video ends]''

Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada

2011-08-14T03:41:49Z

Marco: A bit of polishing is all.

'''Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada''' is a video Chris uploaded on 12 August 2011. Chris uses this video to expose information about Thorg and to show that he is very serious in releasing his information. It was quickly removed as hate-speech. The new [[Pedo-glasses]] make their first appearance on video.

== Video ==
{{quote|**Troll Alias: Thorg. Real Name: Jeremy Slonwhite. Occupation: Single, Virgin, Athiest, Gamestop Employee in Vancouver, BC, Canada. Age: 32 Interestes include: Dungeons and Dragons, Stargate, World of Warcraft, Star Wars, Elder Scrolls, Star Trek, Mountain Dew, Magic the Gathering, LARPing, GURPS, Minecraft, Gaia Online and TROLLING.}}
{{Infobox/video
| name = Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada
| video = {{#ev:youtube|fvjWuUtx4ic}}
| stardate = 12 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Redbra|text}} , Unknown
| previous = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
| next = Current
}}

[[File:TheCatch.jpg|thumb|The one catch to Chris's brilliant scheme.]]

=== Transcript ===
Another fine day, another good day. ''[pause]'' I understand that, uh, Master Thorg, also known as Jeremy, is, uh, very [[Chris and religion#Atheism|atheist]] against me and my ways. So, to prove to h- so to prove to him and to everyone that I am serious, very serious, about revealing [[Trolls|troll]] information…

''[Puts on pedo-glasses.]''

He will be on the chopping block right now. ''[Makes a karate chop hand movement and a sound effect that sounds like a crushed tissue.]''

''[Jerks the camera around wildly to face the TV screen.]''

This is his…trolling persona pho-to-graph. And of course, here's the full photograph, ''[Scrolls down to show picture]'' of which I have shown previously in full- der- in full-- persona. Troll alias: Thorg. Real name: Jeremy Sloanwhite. Lives in- resides in Vancouver, BC, Canna-duh. Occupation: Aga- employee over at- at [[Gamestop|Gamestop]] over there. Age: 32. He is a sin- he is a [[Virgin with rage|single virgin]]. His interests include Dungeons and Dragons, Stargate, World of Warcraft, Star Wars, [[Captain's Log|Star Trek]], The Elder Scrolls, Mountain Dew, Magic: The Gathering, [[wikipedia:GURPS|GURPS]], whatever the hell they are, Minecraft, Gaia Online, LARPing, live action role-play, and trolling.

He is- he was responsible for leaking the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] to the public through the [[CWCki]], Pho'oshopping me into a gay bar, which [[Clyde Cash|Clyde Cash]] uploaded to a billboard in New York City, New York. He has participated in the [[Trollin Train|Trollin' Train]], he [[Kick the Autistic|contributed bad things]] into my [[mailbag]] on the [[CWCkipedia]], and general [[YouTube]], CWCki, trolling, and support roles.

And following that, we have two more photographs of Master Jeremy Sloanwhite. ''[TV screen changes to show almost-completely white photo due to terrible webcam. The photo slowly dims to reveal another Butthurt Dweller photo.]'' What an ugly sunnuvabitch! Really ugly! Eeehh. He looks like he's got a penguin in the background of this photograph.

''[Photo changes again to another photo, holding a piece of paper that reads "CWC is a fat retard tranny [[Calling Out#Re: Don.2C and ReCalling Out .22Thorg.22 - Jeremy|-Thorg 10/8/2011]]"]'' And then there's a more recent one, where he da-erhs- plays atheist against me!

''[Chris' voice raises.]'' EVERYBODY! PLEASE FEEL FREE TO TROLL MR. JEREMY SLOANWHITE, AGE TWE-- AGE THIRTY TWO, IN VANCOUVER, BC, CANNA-[[slow-in-the-minds|DUH]], AT THE GAMESTOP AT WHICH HE WORKS AT!

ATHEIST BEGONE!

''[Jerks the camera back to himself]'' An' then right after that, you will s- everybody can stay tuned for next trolling-- next troll I will be revealing a little bit of info of. In which, uh, now if you'll excuse me, ''[stares off-screen]'' I'm gonna go ''[sudden high-pitched voice, attempting to imitate Ke$ha]'' [[Recycling|brush my teeth with a bottle a' jack]]!

{{Troll Videos}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Correction of EX relationship status]]|nextlink='''Current'''}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]

Talk:Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada

2011-08-13T07:08:01Z

Marco:

{{Not A Forum}}
Anyone transcribing this? --[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 11:39, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
*I'll get to it... [[User:CompyRex|CompyRex]] 12:08, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:I'm not but Haven't I seen that picture of Jeremy on 4Chan somewhere. I swear I've seen that picture many many times before. [[User:ShinGokuIAM|ShinGokuIAM]] 11:43, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

::Yes, apparently it is a popular trolling picture from something wholly unrelated to Thorg. I believe it is referenced on the "Calling Out" page entry. --[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 11:47, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

::: [http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/butthurt-dweller-gordo-granudo Butthurt Dweller] --[[User:SorridSnake|SorridSnake]] 12:03, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

Okay, he's wearing the red bra but he's also wearing an unknown top. kinda looks like a sleeveless robe or something. Anyone got a clue? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 11:48, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

:To me, the coloring suggests its a ''woman's'' tank top. Our little <s>homo</s> tomgirl's fashion sense in action. --[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 11:52, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

It might be worth mentioning that he seems to have quite a cocktail of pill bottles behind him - more than I remember seeing before. The facial tick from the other video makes me think he's either reacting badly to medication, or is in even more desperate need of it than before. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 12:20, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:They look like containers of vitamins/supplements to me. It's also possible he's bought into weight loss pills.--[[User:Henry Bemis|Henry Bemis]] 12:31, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
::That health nut. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 12:38, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:::More like looking for that easy fix. --[[User:Henry Bemis|Henry Bemis]] 12:41, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
::::The styling of the bottles is consistent with [http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1T4ACGW_enUS389US390&q=nature%20made&um=1&hl=en&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=fi&biw=1366&bih=562 Nature Made products], which are generally vitamins and other health supplements. Considering that McDonalds is his standard meal, its not unreasonable to believe Chris is chugging vitamins down in an attempt to balance his intake. --[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 12:44, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

Youtube removed it. Anybody grab it? --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 12:39, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:I didn't, and this is not good either. Chris may be less inclined to upload now that his account has been stricken. :( --[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 12:44, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
::I have a copy, but I'm afriad Youtube will rip it down again if I upload it. --[[User:MaxTehManyula|MaxTehManyula]] 13:05, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:::I think it's less likely to get taken off of CWCVilleLibrary. Nobody's going to report it there. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 13:08, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
::::Besides, his screed(s) against Michael Snyder made its way back on to YouTube under the context of highlighting Chris's idiocy, whereas Chris meant SERIOUS BUSINESS.--[[User:Henry Bemis|Henry Bemis]] 13:13, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:::::That's a relief. I'll see what I can do. --[[User:MaxTehManyula|MaxTehManyula]] 13:14, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
::Here's a copy: http://www.megaupload.com/?d=NANTFJWH [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 13:15, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:::<s>Can someone get a copy posted to TheCWCvilleLibrary? </s>--[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 13:38, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
::::Taken care of. --[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 13:58, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

Anyone know how he's getting this "information" on the trolls? Obviously the images are fake but what about the other information? [[User:CommanderBoreal|CommanderBoreal]] 19:02, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:Chris probably got his stuff via help through someone on the Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia website. No doubt they gathered info on trolls and are giving him TRUE and HONEST information ;) --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 19:14, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

Good job on creating a new video page without fucking it up =) --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 19:16, 12 August 2011 (PDT)

Is the writing on Thorg's sign worth mentioning in the article? I could barely make it out, but as far as I can tell, it reads "Chris is a fat retard tranny. -Thorg" --[[User:Groggers|Groggers]] 23:13, 12 August 2011 (PDT)
:I think so, at least in the transcript. Since the sign is pretty difficult to read in the video, we should see if anyone, especially Thorg, has the photo. --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 00:08, 13 August 2011 (PDT)
::Speaking of mentioning, when Chris made the statement on how ugly "Thorg" is, should we call that out via the Hyprocrisy page and/or joined by a few other pages like his hygiene, obesity, and current tomgirl phase? --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 00:08, 13 August 2011 (PDT)

Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada

2011-08-13T03:47:46Z

Marco: Just took off the Recent box is all.

'''Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada''' is a video Chris uploaded on 12 August 2011. Chris uses this video to expose information about Thorg and to show that he is very serious in releasing his information. It was quickly removed as hate-speech. The new [[Pedo-glasses]] also make another appearance.

== Video ==
{{quote|**Troll Alias: Thorg. Real Name: Slonwhite. Occupation: Single, Virgin, Athiest Gamestop Employee in Vancouver, BC, Canada. Age:32 Interestes include: Dungeons and Dragons, Stargate, World of Warcraft, Star Wars, Elder Scrolls, Star Trek, Mountain Dew, Magic the Gathering, LARPing, GURPS, Minecraft, Gaia Online and TROLLING.}}
{{Infobox/video
| name = Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada
| video = {{#ev:youtube|fvjWuUtx4ic}}
| stardate = 12 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Redbra|text}} , Unknown
| previous = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
| next = Current
}}

[[File:TheCatch.jpg|thumb|The one catch to Chris's brilliant scheme.]]

=== Transcript ===
Another fine day, another good day. ''[pause]'' I understand that, uh, Master Thorg, also known as Jeremy, is, uh, very [[Chris and religion#Atheism|atheist]] against me and my ways. So, to prove to h- so to prove to him and to everyone that I am serious, very serious, about revealing [[Trolls|troll]] information…

''[Puts on pedo-glasses.]''

He will be on the chopping block right now. ''[Makes a karate chop hand movement and a sound effect that sounds like a crushed tissue.]''

''[Jerks the camera around wildly to face the TV screen.]''

This is his…trolling persona pho-to-graph. And of course, here's the full photograph, ''[Scrolls down to show picture]'' of which I have shown previously in full- der- in full-- persona. Troll alias: Thorg. Real name: Jeremy Sloanwhite. Lives in- resides in Vancouver, BC, Canna-duh. Occupation: Aga- employee over at- at [[Gamestop|Gamestop]] over there. Age: 32. He is a sin- he is a [[Virgin with rage|single virgin]]. His interests include Dungeons and Dragons, Stargate, World of Warcraft, Star Wars, [[Captain's Log|Star Trek]], The Elder Scrolls, Mountain Dew, Magic: The Gathering, [[wikipedia:GURPS|GURPS]], whatever the hell they are, Minecraft, Gaia Online, LARPing, live action role-play, and trolling.

He is- he was responsible for leaking the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] to the public through the [[CWCki]], Pho'oshopping me into a gay bar, which [[Clyde Cash|Clyde Cash]] uploaded to a billboard in New York City, New York. He has participated in the [[Trollin Train|Trollin' Train]], he [[Kick the Autistic|contributed bad things into my mailbag]] on the [[CWCkipedia]], and general [[YouTube]], CWCki, trolling, and support roles.

And following that, we have two more photographs of Master Jeremy Sloanwhite. ''[TV screen changes to show almost-completely white photo due to terrible webcam. The photo slowly dims to reveal another Butthurt Dweller photo.]'' What an ugly sunnuvabitch! Really ugly! Eeehh. He looks like he's got a penguin in the background of this photograph.

''[Photo changes again to another photo, holding a piece of paper in front of him]'' And then there's a more recent one, where he da-erhs- plays atheist against me!

''[Chris' voice raises.]'' EVERYBODY! PLEASE FEEL FREE TO TROLL MR. JEREMY SLOANWHITE, AGE TWE-- AGE THIRTY TWO, IN VANCOUVER, BC, CANNA-[[slow-in-the-minds|DUH]], AT THE GAMESTOP AT WHICH HE WORKS AT!

ATHEIST BEGONE!

''[Jerks the camera back to himself]'' An' then right after that, you will s- everybody can stay tuned for next trolling-- next troll I will be revealing a little bit of info of. In which, uh, now if you'll excuse me, ''[stares off-screen]'' I'm gonna go ''[sudden high-pitched voice, attempting to imitate Ke$ha]'' [[Recycling|brush my teeth with a bottle a' jack]]!

{{Troll Videos}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Correction of EX relationship status]]|nextlink='''Current'''}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]

Calling Out

2011-08-10T22:06:23Z

Marco:

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of five [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-10 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
This video, also known as '''101 2461''' , Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information as to the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka Don). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|right|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a TV-Y7 rated... [[Chris and English|friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal-Pals|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my [[Lie|life]], my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out "Thorg, aka Jeremy, ([[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again, sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

[[Fail|I win]].

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands - 31 August, 2011, or else [[jerkops|the authorities]] will intervene.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands Alec, Tito and Thorg to [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later goes into a tirade over the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, repeating the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times ad nausuem. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from the [[For My Sweetest Ivy|video for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Unknown
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molestor! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded, and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear, when it was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Redbra|text}}, Unknown
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Well, it seems I have gotten a [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZhlo94cMNk well-wise response] to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [http://www.thetester.com/ The Tester]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals.. and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his mircales before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just empathize with him on that...

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you don't respond by the 31st, ''[snaps fingers and widens his eyes]'' I mean business. Check your privileges!

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]

It's not that cold

2011-08-10T05:06:24Z

Marco: Should the sentence with Patti eating Chris's soul go, stay, or wait until the next video to decide?

{{Recent}}
'''It's not that cold''' is an incredibly bizarre and potentially nightmare fuelish video [[Chris]] uploaded on 9 [[August 2011]]. Chris appears to be outside, dressed in a red [[muscle bra]] and an [[Chris and fashion|ill-fitting]] ''miniskirt''. Chris then "digs up" [[Patti]] and wears her as a coat while humming "Goodbye Horses" and making references to ''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Silence_of_the_Lambs_(film) The Silence of the Lambs]''. It should also be noted that [[Patti]] will be having Chris's soul for dinner tonight.

== Video ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = It's not that cold
| video = {{#ev:youtube|FTS2n3A7Gzc}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Comedy|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Calling Out#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
| next = Current
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Would you mount and do me.jpg|thumb|right|Reality was much more horrifying.]]
''[Chris walks into frame and crosses his arms over his chest, and proceeds to shake his head, causing his cheek fat to shake around]''

Ooh...brrrr...ooh, sure is cold out here...ooohh. Could really use, uh, somethin' to...k-keep me warm right now...or something.

''[Chris begins imitating what appears to be a digging-like motion]''

''[Chris starts humming, before putting on a jacket and wraps fur around his neck, holding it in place]''

There we are! All nice and snuggley warm...and cozy. Thank you [[Patti]]! Now we are [[speech impediment|togedder]], forever.

''[Continues humming, and shows his ass to the camera, pulling up his skirt]''

Would you fuck me, [[/cwc/|789Chan]]? I'd fuck me.

''[Pats his ass, and ontinues humming and begins to dance around like Buffalo Bill before sauntering over to the camera]''

Patt-''[Video ends]''

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Calling Out#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]|nextlink=Current}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]

Disguises

2011-03-01T08:32:09Z

Marco:

As with [[lies|lying]], Chris is not very skilled at the art of [[Disguises|disguises]] and deception.

==Chris's Disguises==

===Junior Jenkins (a.k.a. JenkinsJinkies)===
[[Image:Fatjenkins.jpg|left|thumb]]
{{quote|I am not a pussy; I am as wild as a serial raper.|Super Troll JenkinsJinkies (NOT [[Chris|CHRIS]])}}

In May 2010, Chris attempted to infiltrate the CWCki under the guise of the 14-year-old Junior Jenkins. After about a month of making minor, unnoticed edits, he created the [[Coffee Place]] article in an attempt to get trolls to go after some random lady. Trolls promptly strung him along, convincing Chris that he had become famous. In an attempt to blend in, Chris tried to imitate what he believed to be the mannerisms of an average troll. He claimed to be a fourteen year old Bostonian, which was highly suspicious considering that [[BlueSpike|a certain troll]] hailed from the exact same city and both were of the same age. As usual, Chris made no Effort to disguise his [[Chris and English|Distinct Typing Pattern]]. He would also randomly spout net jargon like "butthurt" and "mindfuck" with no clear idea of what those phrases actually meant, at one point even using "butthurt" as a verb.

He was also "secretly" terrified of Chris. This was likely another attempt to fit in, only it became a major aspect of Junior's personality after multiple trolls informed him that they were not, in fact, afraid of Chris in the slightest. In his final post, Junior claimed that he was petrified with shock upon "witnessing" the destruction of Chris's PS3.

Chris abandoned Junior after he became worried that the police might mistake him for a troll and arrest him.

 

===Bill Riley===
[[Image:BillRiley.jpg|left|thumb]]
{{quote|You know what we should do, we should make him force himself on his counslor [sic]|Novice Troll Bill Riley (NOT [[Chris|CHRIS]])}}

Bill was a 30 year old man who found nothing strange about female trolls asking about the dimensions of his genitalia. When asked why he was trolling Chris, he claimed that it was because Chris killed Clyde Cash, called him a homo, and sent him a computer virus. He did nothing in the chat except lurk, waiting for trolls to reveal a big plan. When pressured into suggesting ideas of his own, Bill suggested that trolls make Chris rape Rocky. When asked how this would troll Chris, he claimed that Chris would "compare himself" to Rocky mid-rape and see how inferior he was.

Bill was the first of Chris's attempts to impersonate a troll. From the start, there are tons of problems, the least of which being that the man in the photograph Chris provided is very clearly over the age of thirty. Chris made no effort to conceal his highly noticeable Typing Manner. Eventually, he realized he was found out.

 

===The Real Chris Chandler===
[[Image:Liquidd.jpg|left|thumb]]
{{quote|I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first DOSAGE of my comeuppance!|The [[Liquid Chris|Real Chris]] (NOT [[Solid Chris|CHRIS]])}}

During the Liquid saga, Chris attempted to steal Liquid's girlfriend, [[Kacey]]. Kacey [[Kacey Phone Call|spoke to Chris over the phone]], in which Chris attempted to impersonate her lover. He made no effort to impersonate Liquid's voice, and at one point forgot that he was supposed to be someone else. At one point, he uploaded a video in which he attempted to continue this deception to his own account--something that Liquid would not have been able to do.

Eventually, Chris decided to come clean about it. Kacey was not pleased.

 

===Samantha Thaddeus===
[[Image:Samthad.jpg|left|thumb]]
{{quote|I gotta do some grocery shopping, Plus I'm having a few cramps|Teenage Girl Samantha Thaddeus (NOT [[Chris|CHRIS]])}}

Hilarity ensued when Chris attempted to impersonate Samantha Thaddeus. Despite being in contact with her for an extended period of time prior to assuming control of her email account, his "Samantha" was completely off-track. In his very first email to Jack Thaddeus under this alias, Chris assumed the mannerisms of a cartoonish male thug working for an evil organization. As Jack strung Chris along, Chris also came into contact with [[Katie Bay E-mails|Katie Bay]]. In both of these emails, Samantha is suddenly a hilarious cross between how Chris thinks women act and how Chris thinks trolls act.

 

===Carlos Chantor===
[[Image:Chantor.jpg|left|thumb]]
{{quote|Experienced for Her Pleasure.|Sexual Master [[Carlos Chantor|Carlos Chantor]] (NOT [[Virgin|CHRIS]])}}

During the summer of 2010, Chris attempted to become a male escort under the alias of Carlos Chantor. He gave up after nobody called him. Oddly enough, this is actually his most practical disguise, as he simply hid away on a corner of the internet where nobody expected him to go, changed his name, and wore normal clothes. It just goes to show how normal Chris could look if he weren't such a lazy slob.

 

{{stub}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

JenkinsJinkies

2011-03-01T08:18:32Z

Marco: Or would Chris and English be the better choice over Merried Seinor Comic?

'''Junior Jenkins''', alias '''JenkinsJinkies''' (born c. [[1996]]) was Chris's [[Disguises|trollsona]] from [[May 2010|May]] to [[August 2010]].

==CWCki==
[[image:Fatjenkins.jpg|thumb|The great <s>Cobra Commander</s> JenkinsJinkies]]
JenkinsJinkies began as another [[CWCki]] account, made by Chris to confirm that the antenna he had removed from his [[PS3]] wasn't a bug in [[PS3/How the PS3 is Hacked]], a bait page made by [[Clyde]]. It was [[fail|quickly discovered]] that JenkinsJinkies was Chris, and [[Trollin Train|appropriate action]] was taken soon afterwards. Clyde contacted Chris through JenkinsJinkies' [[User talk:JenkinsJinkies|talk page]], and it resulted in a short correspondence between the two.

{{quote|I lost my young virginity with a [[Merried Seinor Comic|Seinor]] [[Kellie Andes|Cheerleader]]; her [[china]] was sweeeeettt! Plus, as an [[ED|Anon]], I prefer to keep my add off of the web. I would not want Chris coming after my ass. The mindfuck that he is, I would not want to fall victim of one of his impulsive manchild rampages. I just enjoy getting the [[Laughs Under Lucricities|LULZ]] off of him.|JenkinsJinkies, the 14 year old [[homos|sodomite]] who had gay sex at the age of 7 and lost his [[virgin|virginity]] to a High School student beforehand. Who also lives directly [[14 Branchland Ct.|across the street]] from Chris.}}

Chris believed playing a troll who was [[Chris and Reality|legitimately]] afraid of Chris's wrath would totally convince [[Clyde Cash]] himself that he was legit. He also unsuccessfully tried to scare the trolls into thinking he was plotting to hunt them down, one by one. Several [[/cwc/|lesser]] trolls believed they were the first ones to realize that JenkinsJinkies was Chris, and blew the whistle every now and again, but such leaks were uncommon and generally most trolls played along.

==Trollin Train==

As the trolls began to tug on JenkinsJinkies's marionette strings, a [[Trollin Train|trolling forum]] entirely dedicated to making Chris paranoid was established. Despite all posts, members and threads being only a few days old, Chris was [[Naive|completely convinced]] that it was the official trolling hub, where all the nefarious plots made against him were conceived.

As if it weren't obvious enough that Junior Jenkins was Chris, he also went out of his way to praise Chris for his ingenious schemes for halting the trolls wicked plans and/or dissuade the trolls from even trying - often combining the two themes into the same post.

{{quote|I have to hand it to him, he makes it Frustrating to Troll Him. It's like we have to PAY AirFare or HitchHike Dangerously and do it Old-Fashioned with Accordian Cameras and shit like that.|JuniorJenkins, [[#Damn! (Wed 25 Aug 2010 5:42 am)|Trollin Train]].}}

Junior Jenkins also had run-ins with the ghosts of [[Patti Chandler]] and seven year old Christopher Chandler as Chris inexplicably believed that trolls would be frightened by these events. They were not, and Jenkins was roundly mocked.

In another memorable event, Jenkins unsubtly asked for the numbers of the hookers [[Bryan Bash]] sent to Chris's house because Chris wanted sexy time.

==PS3 Destruction==

Trolling Train's most significant achievement came about when [[Surfshack Tito]] offered a number of "bounties" for achievements in trolling Chris, including a US$9,001 reward for anyone who could smash Chris's [[PS3]]. Due to a misinterpretation of Tito's criteria, Chris thought he could get the reward if ''he'' did the smashing and simply had Junior claim to witness it. The rest [[PS3#Destruction|is history]].

Though Chris [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|did not]] receive the $9,001, he managed to raise the money to buy a new PS3 over the course of a few days.

==See also==
*[[Trollin Train]]
*[[JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV]]
*[[Disguises]]

{{stub}}
[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Chris's alter egos]]

February 2011

2011-02-28T11:33:07Z

Marco: There a better word to use than "important"?

'''February 2011''' has begun with Chris playing ''[[LittleBigPlanet]] 2'' and dicking around on the [[PlayStation Network]]. Compared to the last two months, there has been a significant increase in important content, mainly from two past [[sweetheart|sweethearts]] [[Kacey]] and the ghost of [[Ivy]] and Chris himself.

==Events==
* 8 February - Chris leaves a message on his ''[[LittleBigPlanet 2]]'' account begging for a change on the [[CWCki]] main page.<ref>http://lbp.me/v/w4vcbs</ref>
*12 February - The video [[CWC's Collector's Case Tutorial]], made by Chris, is published.
*13 February - [[Ivy Q&A]] is released.
*13 February - A video of Chris's ''LBP2'' [[Autism Tutorial]] is released.
*14 February - Valentine's Day passes. Chris is still in search for his [[Sweetheart]].
*24 February - Chris's 29th [[birthday]].
*25 February - [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] goes for an entire year without a single new page uploaded ([[Book10Replacement|excluding the "corrected" ending]]).
*26 February - A [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey|new phone call]] between Chris and [[Kacey]] is released.

==Sauce==
<references />

{{Timeline}}

User:Marco

2011-02-27T07:14:46Z

Marco:

{{quote|A CWCDefense is a [[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]]!}}

==Also Known As==

Formerly known as CWCAttack. (Until I lost my password.)

==In His Own Words==

I think [[User:Evang|Evan]] is a pretty cool guy. Eh supports [[homos]] and doesn't afraid of anything.

==Ten Reasons Why Sonichu Sucks==

1) Because Sonichu Comics are UN-Original.

2) Chris admits he got HIS ideas from SEGA AND NINTENDO'S Characters and Comics and Video Games (and a lot, lot more other sources).

3) Sonichu has been around for ALMOST Ten Years Now; Asperchu has been around only a few months and gaining more praise than Sonichu's ever had.

4) Chris doesn't draw gore, and he rarely draws nudity or references, but he writes them in in great detail so you are still very likely to feel queasy in comparison.

5) It is a Straight-Oriented Comic Series.

6) All of the events around CHRIS were based and twisted from His Real-Life Expierences.

7) He claims to have suffered more than Alec has as an individual in life.

8) He uses excuses about working a lot harder in life to cope with those trials and rightful punishments.

9) The comic pages are ALL Poorly Hand-Drawn; the text gets fixed in Comic Sans for better reading, but the structure of the comic itself doesn't help it much.

10) He's had way over a million trolls worldwide since he went online in before 2000.

==Medals==
{{Americunt}}
{{Asexual}}
{{White}}
{{Observer}}

==Notable Contributions==
* [[Down with asperchu|Down With Asperchu!!!]] (Minus the Transcript)

* Taking off a random news article in [[January 2010]].

* Retexting epic tard scream in [[12 January 2010#Part 2|12 January 2010]].

* The [[Death threats#Alec Benson Leary section|Alec Benson Leary]] in [[Death threats]] with the cooperation of [[User:Blazer|Blazer]] (See, I ain't a [[Chris and his ego|narcissist]]).

* The [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:TheREALTailofRosechu.jpg REAL Tail of Rosechu] file for the [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|Transgenderism]] article in [[Rosechu]] with the cooperation of [[User:Phlegethon|Phlegethon]].

==Sub-Episode: How to Fail Miserably in Less Than Five Minutes==

'''(Read bottom to front, please.)'''

[[File:GreatFailure.png]]

Such fail even rivals a typical one of a certain [[Chris|great failure of epic proportions]].

File:GreatFailure.png

2011-02-27T07:06:42Z

Marco:

Talk:February 2011

2011-02-27T03:09:18Z

Marco: Created page with "==The last of the Sonichu pages== "25 February - Sonichu goes for an entire year without a single new page uploaded." This isn't 100% correct, on account of ..."

==The last of the Sonichu pages==
"25 February - [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] goes for an entire year without a single new page uploaded."

This isn't 100% correct, on account of the [[Book10Replacement|"corrected" ending]] shown seven months later. Should we...
* Take off the line mentioning the comic until October 30, when the "corrected" ending was shown?
* Add the exception of the ending to the date?
* Just leave it be?

--[[User:Marco|Marco]] 19:09, 26 February 2011 (PST)

January 2011

2011-02-27T01:05:03Z

Marco: The same exact level as the one in the last game.

'''January 2011''' opened in the shadow of Chris's resignation from the [[Internet]] on 22 [[November 2010]]. The month was as uneventful as the previous, Chris presumably spending the entirety of the month playing on his [[PS3]].

==Events==
*11 January - ''DC Universe Online'' is released. Chris buys it later and spends the next couple of days playing the game.
*18 January - Chris blows eighty dollars on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]] 2''.
*28 January - Chris rereleases ''Sonichu'': Episode #1 to the ''LittleBigPlanet'' community.
*30 January - Chris's [[Trollin Train]] posts are unveiled to the public, while [[JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV]] is leaked.
{{Timeline}}

Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey

2011-02-26T21:25:40Z

Marco:

{{Transcription}}

[[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey]] is a three-part series of videos that was leaked out onto the internet on [[February 2011|February 21, 2011]] by one [http://www.youtube.com/user/MiHiVidz MiHiVidz] on [[Youtube]]. The series showcases the long-lost phone conversation between [[Kacey]] and Chris on [[November 2009|10 November 2009]] that led to Kacey severing all connections from Chris, the [[Kacey#Marriage to Liquid|marriage of Liquid Chris and Kacey the following day]], and the resulting [[CWC is Sad|video]] in which Chris tried not to cry over losing his [[Chris and reality|potential]] [[sweetheart]].

== Part 1 ==
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey, Part 1
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|oFDnyny_9Ls}}
| Stardate = 10 November 2009
| Featuring = [[Solid Chris]]; [[Kacey]]
| Subject = Kacey confronts Solid Chris on his treatment of her and on his poor lifestyle choices
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| Other = Chris claims to have [http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/tunnel+vision?show=0&t=1298741167 tunnel vision], but his description of the affliction sounds more like either OCD, [http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/monomania monomania], or [[Asperger's syndrome]]. Chris also uses the term "heel" to describe himself as a bad person, a term that hasn't been used popularly since the [[Bob|1950s]].
| previous = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey|First]]
| next = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey#Part 2|Part 2]]
}}

''[Done up to 05:00, more to come later]''

'''Chris:''' Hello?
 '''Kacey:''' Hi, Chris. It's Kacey.
 '''Chris:''' Oh, hey Kacey.
 '''Kacey:''' I-I got Kim's e-mail, she said to call you?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah, we need--yeah, uh, I feel like we need to, uh, talk, you know, [[Kacey and Liquid Call|sort out what happened the other night]]. Yeah, I did not mean--I did not mean to ignore you, and I was aware you were there and I'm sorr--I'm sorr--I wanted to call you guys back.
 '''Kacey:''' [speaks over Chris] Well, you didn't really...act like I was there, I, like, I'm pretty sure you just straight-out ignored everything I said.
 '''Chris:''' [makes a strange grunting noise] Yeah, yeah well let me talk about that. You see, uh, I have, uh, what--one of my problems is that I have [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tunnel_vision tunnel vision]. You know, it's like, uh, when, like, [[Autism|you concentrate on one thing and you're pretty much set until its done]]. And, uh, and Chris was--
 '''Kacey:''' [speaks over Chris] It--It--It doesn't matter, it made me feel like [[Liquid Chris|Chris]] is more important than I was. You were more concerned about what he saying even though you think they're lies, than what I was saying even though I'm saying the truth. I mean, it's like, it's like you wanted him more than you wanted me.
 '''Chris:''' Kacey...That's not true. That's not true.
 '''Kacey:''' But--But I mean, if you have tunnel vision shouldn't your tunnel vision have been pointed at ''me'' and not ''him''?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you see, another one of my flaws is, uh, when I get really [[stressed]] my mind tends to blank out and my problem solving skills, uh, pretty much, uh, temporary [[Chris and English|[sic]]] go down the toilet there. And...it just blank up and it justs really blanks me out, and, don't--
 '''Kacey:''' I know, but what's very important to me is that I have someone who can defend me, you weren't even defending me at all, you were just [[tard rage|screaming]] at him. I need someone who's quick on their feet. I mean, did you realize how much I was hurt last night?
 '''Chris:''' ...Yeah, I realize how much you were hurt, um, I'm very sorry about that, I real-I realize what a heel I was.
 '''Kacey:''' Alright, but did you really realize that, or did someone have to tell you that?
 '''Chris:''' Nope, I realized it. No one had to tell me. [pause] I did talk to Kim about it, though.
 '''Kacey:''' Well I know you talked to Kim, she's the one who e-mailed me.
 '''Chris:''' ...Yep. But, anyway, Kacey, I do love you. I really do. I'm very sorry I ignored you.
 '''Kacey:''' But, you haven't even tried to contact me until Kim told you to! I mean, how can you say you love me or care about me, and you were just going to, like, okay, I was so hurt, and I, I mean, what would you have done, I mean, if you didn't talk to me? I mean, I could have just gone off and done whatever, you would have been out of sight, out of mind. You couldn't even send a simple e-mail. I mean, it's like you didn't even care that I was hurt or crying or anything.
 '''Chris:''' No, I di-I did care. I just, uh, I was under st--I was under the shock, too.
 '''Kacey:''' What shock? There was no shock!
 '''Chris:''' You know, realizing what a heel I was and how hurt you were...and that made me feel hurt. You know? 'Cause...
 '''Kacey:''' Then, why didn't you try to contact me? You would think you want to if you just hurt someone you, um, supposedly love.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you're right, I should have, yeah, I should have contacted you sooner. I just feel I-I thought--
 '''Kacey:''' You were too busy playing [[video games]] again, weren't you?
 '''Chris:''' No, I just thought--I just thought that you might need your spa--you might need some space, you know?
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, 'cause I'm hurting so you're just going to let me hurt all alone, or-or-or worse, in your opinion, you were gonna let me be with Chris, I mean, what did you think was gonna happen? I mean, you were playing video games today anyway, don't lie to me, I know you were.
 '''Chris:''' Okay, I played some video games. I played some video games.
 '''Kacey:''' See? Those are more important than me, too! How the heck are you supposed to have a [[girlfriend]] if you can't even talk to her unless her friend tells you to do it? You're just going to sit around and play video games all day, I mean, I could be hurt or sick or something, and you wouldn't know because your video games are more important.
 '''Chris:''' No, Kacey, you are more important. [Chris begins to speak, but Kacey interrupts]
 '''Kacey:''' But you're not acting like it at all.

== Part 2 ==
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey, Part 2
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|Lmf1rD72zwI}}
| Stardate = 10 [[November 2009]]
| Featuring = [[Solid Chris]]; [[Kacey]]
| Subject = Kacey talks about education, [[stress]], and employment
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| Other = Chris apparently got over 1100 on the SATs, but never went to a four-year university
| previous = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey#Part 1|Part 1]]
| next = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey#Part 3|Part 3]]
}}

== Part 3 ==
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey, Part 3
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|u2D74OGq_jQ}}
| Stardate = 10 [[November 2009]]
| Featuring = [[Chris]], [[Kacey]]
| Subject = Kacey explains why she's out of Chris's league and why he will always be a [[virgin with rage]]
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| Other = Chris thinks he is better than people who are alcoholics
| previous = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey#Part 2|Part 2]]
| next = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey|Final]]
}}

{{FanChats}}

{{succession|label=Kacey Phone Calls|prevlink=[[Kacey and Liquid Call]]|nextlink=[[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey|Final]]}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

File talk:1298064748222.jpg

2011-02-19T08:26:01Z

Marco: Created page with "Where did you find that, I must ask? --~~~~"

Where did you find that, I must ask? --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 00:26, 19 February 2011 (PST)

Autism Tutorial Part 5

2011-02-19T04:20:08Z

Marco: May need a better photo. Hopefully, I'll remember to get one.

In '''Autism Tutorial Part 5''', [[Chris]] uses ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' to demonstrate how to "properly" introduce an [[autistic]] person to a new friend, but all it really does is ascertain that his only motivation for socializing with other people, is that doing so theoretically heightens his chances of getting that [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up]] his [[duck]] so desperately hungers for. He then reenacts, yet again, an assault of [[Clyde Cash]].

Chris also fails to see the hypocrisy of demanding people treat him nicely because he's retarded, then telling people who are deformed or mentally challenged that he's frightened of them and wants them to stay away from him.
==Video==

<Center>{{#ev:youtube|wS_Rxp8DIjw}}</Center>

===Transcript===

[[Image:Cashed2.jpg|thumb|right|This is what Chris actually believes.]]

''(Rather than a voice-over, the first segment of the video is a text-only conversation between sack-Chris and several sack-imaginary girls.)''

Mic: Nonette, this is [[Christian Chandler]], but you may call him Chris. Chris, this here is Nonette Sehen.

Sack-Chris: Hey Nonette, you are a pretty woman, and I am happy to meet you.

''(The two Sack-people touch eachother, presumably symbolizing a handshake)''

Nonette: ''(clearly needs glasses)'' Well, I think you have a very good face, and I am delighted to meet you too.

''(Chris's melodic voice takes over narration for the remainder of the video)''

Now understand, ''this'' is what I'm talking about for us autistic people. We are too shy by default! But on earning our trust, or if we feel comfortable or like the other person on our indid-ividual instincts, we will open up. And to start us right, we need either: A) The other person to approach and talk to us, upon their own will, or B) have our own trusted friend or family introduce us to other people of our respective ages.

In this scenario, it was a great match for me, for A) she is a [[Boyfriend-free girl|single woman, without a boyfriend]]: B) she is pretty, and easy on my eyes. And C) this woman I could feel comfortable with, and feel a good and honest aura from her. From this a good friendship, and hopefully a [[sex|f-]] a long relationship will stay between us for the long time. (Voice deepens with hatred) Do not bring me down here, naysayers and [[Trolls|haters]].

Lets look at a few other scenarios of similar to opposite results. Obviously, most women: ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' Easy on my eyes, good-humored, sweet, pretty... [[Niggo|black]], white, [[Punchy|Asian]], Christian, [[Michael Snyder|Jewish]], Buddhism, I have no, c- I have no care about skin color or religion, whatever. I will be kind to all of them, respectful and welcoming them, to have them in my circle of friends. Lesbians, too... Just don't get on my bad side here. ''[Subitle: "To clarify, the 'Don't get on my bad side' part refers to All Women in general'"]''

[[JERKS|Men]], my own... ''kind'', on the other hand, I would feel most hesitant towards. Because I have had fewer male friends in my life, and I have had mostly bad experiences around them. ''Plus'', and this is very important, in my autism test it was found that I get along better with women, well over ''men''. ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' And considering my life experiences and my own opinion, I totally agree with that. If the, uh, individual, however, offers a, uh, friendly gesture, and does not make me [[Chris and anger|angry]] or make me feel most uncomfortable, or ill at ease, I will be willing to give him a chance and welcome him as a friend, and nothing more. ''[Subtitle: "**PLATONICALLY Friendly**"]''

However, going back to the mean people of the internet... Upon meeting one of them in real life - and I will be able to recognize them sure enough, at least with basic instincts - I will not hold back my endured rage. Just ask this crying [[Clyde]]. ''(A scene of a livid Sack-Chris smacking Sack-Clyde follows before the narration continues.)''

Physically and [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally challenged]] individuals will vary more. Good results upon if they are easy to look at, if they are able to speak clearly, even ''slooowly'', that I can easily understand them. ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' And now, uh, the other part, the other side, whoa, back off! I'm spooked if you are [[Chris and Fashion#The "Gay Trucker" outfit|ugly]], [[Duck|seriously disfigured]], especially in the face, that you [[Chris and English|mumble more than you speak]], you're [[Speech impediment|hard to understand]] at all. It is nothing personal, and I apologize for anyone who feels at unease after hearing what I just said, but [[Chris and Hypocrisy|it's just the way I feel.]] That's all.

{{succession|label=[[Autism Tutorial|Autism Tutorial Videos]]|prevlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 4]]|nextlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 6]]|}}

[[Category:LittleBigPlanet]]

Autism Tutorial Extra

2011-02-19T04:16:31Z

Marco: May get a better photo of this, but not too likely.

{{quote|'''Ja!'''|Hans Asperger}}

'''Autism Tutorial Extra''' is a ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' level created by [[Chris]] where he proves, [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|once again]] that he's in complete denial of what [[Asperger syndrome]] really is. Interestingly, the level works in the same way for the [[Autism Tutorial]], as the [[Sub-Episodes]] did for the [[Sonichu comic]], namely with Chris proving his superiority over an obvious strawman by psychically assaulting him and then prattling on about how much unbearable torment the strawman in question has inflicted upon him. Chris also mispronounces Asperger as “Ass Burger” the entire time, [[Jack_Thaddeus_Phone_Call_2|showing he's learned nothing]].

==Video==

<Center>{{#ev:youtube|Am4f9P5LPs8}}</Center>

===Transcript===
[[Image:Hans_asperger.jpg|thumb|right|Dr. Hans Asperger was a famed pediatrician whose work to improve the quality of life for autistic children earned him international renown and the admiration of thousands.]]
[[Image:Aspergered.jpg|thumb|right|In this video, Chris beats him up because he doesn't like his last name.]]
And now, ladies and gentlemen, because apparently after you decided to watch last part--after watching the Autism Tutorial, we have a special guest for you today! Please put your hands together for a reasonably facsimile of, Mr. Hans Asperger!

(Hans Asperger is seen at the far end of the stage. He has gigantic bulging eyes and wears a crown. Chris walks over to join him, standing [[Homos|almost intimately close]] to shake his hand, as a backdrop and desk fall from the sky to complete the talk-show atmosphere. After Chris walks over to his desk, Hans smiles and waves to an audience silent as the grave.)

I am your host, Christian Chandler, on this '''[[Duck|short]]''' talk show. And this is Mr. Hans Asperger. Now, let's talk about him for a bit: Now, apparently--Mr. Hans Asperger. From the Vienna University Hospital in 1938--Oh, how ''recent!''--you gave a lecture in Germany, on "[[Chris|Autistic Psychopaths]]", after investigating a mild form of Autism. Isn't that right, Hans?

(Hans turns to face Chris.)

'''Hans:''' Ja!

And also, apparently, this separate diagnosis, as it is quoted, was not recognized until 1991. Only one year before I was born. Although coined from your name, Mr. Asperger, apparently a Mr. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leo_Kanner Leo Kanner] took the study much further and established the term "Early Infantile Autism". Do you applaud Mr. Kanner for his work?

'''Hans:''' Ja!

''I see''. Now, in my feeling alone--possibly mutual with others--the name Asperger. It strikes me badly, and I feel offended just by hearing the word. Do you feel I have the right to my own opinions and feelings as an individual person, Hans?

'''Hans:''' Ja! (It is clear by now that Hans does not understand English.)

Thank you very much, good sir. Now, do you feel--do you feel bad about having a name that sounds like a bad cut of cow meat?

'''Hans:''' Ja!

Do you feel that I, Christian Weston Chandler, do not deserve any blame or punishment for having an opinion of a single word, such as Asperger?

'''Hans:''' Ja!

Do you have a general understanding about how I feel about you now?

(Something falls from the sky and lands atop Chris's desk.)

'''Hans:''' Ja!

(Chris walks over to Hans again, once again intimately close.)

Are you ''positive'' you really understand how I feel about you, Mr. Hans Asperger?

'''Hans:''' Ja!

(Chris gives a wide, deceptive smile as he goes back and forth with Hans.)

[[Random Access Humor|Yeah?

'''Hans:''' Ja!

Yeah?

'''Hans:''' Ja!

Yeah?

'''Hans:''' Ja!]]

(Chris is suddenly very annoyed. He bitch-slaps Hans to the ground. It is also revealed that Hans has a tail.)

[[Wikipedia:Baka_(fool)|Baka]]!

(Hans quickly regains his footing, facing away from Chris and looking over his shoulder in terror.)

I feel dislike towards you! For selfishly putting your ill name in association with autism! And with a name like Asperger! I feel it only makes us Autistic kind sound ''even worse!'' ''Aspergers.'' You shoulda left it as it was!. Autism is autism! And in your research you linked it up with psychopaths! I feel even more offended at ''that!'' Now get out of my sight!

'''Hans:''' Ja! (Hans quickly runs off the stage.)

(Chris looks out over the audience, crossing his hands in front of him.)

I do apologize for that, uh, rude outburst, [[Trolls|folks]]. But then again, that was just the way I felt and have been feeling about the word "Asperger" since I first heard it a few years ago. It is my second least favorite word, where my first least favorite of all time is "[[Naive]]". Again, I apologize if I came off as bad to anybody, or made them feel bad, for the way I acted. But then again, I do get emotional and carried away sometimes. Thank you for watching, and have a good, safe, and blessed day.

(The game cuts to Hans standing in some sort of Level Completion area, still terrified. He stands there, legs quaking, as the screen behind him rattles off the achievements. Some tiny explosions of what appear to be glass go off around Hans's head as the video ends.)

{{succession|label=[[Autism Tutorial|Autism Tutorial Videos]]|prevlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 6]]|nextlink=[[Autism Tutorial Extra|Current]]|}}

[[Category:LittleBigPlanet]]

File:Cashed2.jpg

2011-02-19T04:13:55Z

Marco: uploaded a new version of "File:Cashed2.jpg"

File:Cashed2.jpg

2011-02-19T04:13:19Z

Marco:

File:Aspergered.jpg

2011-02-19T04:12:20Z

Marco: uploaded a new version of "File:Aspergered.jpg": Oh, the immaturity.

Oh, the immaturity.

File:Aspergered.jpg

2011-02-19T04:10:34Z

Marco: Oh, the immaturity.

Oh, the immaturity.

ECV 00001

2010-10-11T04:11:17Z

Marco:

[[File:CryingIndian.jpg|thumb|Iron Eyes Cody weeps from all that has been lost.]]
[[File:johnredcorn.jpg|thumb|left|John Redcorn does not approve.]]

'''ECV 00001''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 9 [[October 2010]], in which he paraphrases [[Wikipedia:Cherokee|the Wikipedia article]] about the [[Cherokee]] while dressed as what he thinks they looked like.

Throughout the video, he holds a [[PlayStation]] Move controller and a matching "Navigation Controller", probably to show off his purchase in the delusion that anyone gives a shit. (It is, however, refreshing to note that all of the [[sex toys|dildo jokes]] about the Move do ''not'' deter a True PlayStation Fan.) Chris has also returned to using his old [[PSEye]] to record this video, which causes a number of skips to occur throughout the video. As is evident in the video title, the EyeCreate video counter has been reset to 1, due to his [[PS3#The Rebirth|new PS3]].

Of note is how Chris is careful to elaborate how peaceful the Cherokee clan was, specifically how [[Prickly-Wicklies|war is bad]], yet he pulls a 180 near the end by stating how fierce they were and that the [[Death threats|trolls should beware.]] Chris, always sensitive to the plight of minorities, speaks in a stereotypical "kemosabe" style Indian voice until he starts talking about black people at which point he starts speaking in a hip, urban manner in order to show that he is [[Retarded|"down"]].

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00001
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mum48216-C0}}
| stardate = 9 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}, {{Violence|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{Cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[100 2270]]
| next = [[A Hike]]
}}

=== Transcription ===

[[Image:TRUE_and_ORIGINAL_Cherokian_Man.png|thumb|right|This is what Chris actually believes.]]

''[Chris is wearing his [[muscle bra]] with construction paper accents to give his impression of a very very [[homos|fierce]] Cherokee warrior. He has his arms crossed over his chest with a PlayStation Move controller in each hand]''

Me noble Cherokee man. I come to you with a brief bit of introduction to our Cherokee clan. We were a peaceful lace... peaceful race, most of our history is encrypted within [[Spanish]] history. Some of it was previously uh translated, was translated, as can— found on the [[Wikipedia]] under the term "Cherokee" C-H-E-R-O-K-E-E. [Ed: The E is barely there because of one of the skips.]

We were very peaceful, [[wikipedia:King of the Hill|I tell ya what.]] We were so peaceful, that we found war activities to be a polluting activity. And we had and a whole and before it was revoked we had purity sessions of which our priests of our clans purified the warriors that went out into battle before they come into to the village and resume life there. And we were even bartered as [[Rosechu|slut]]— bartered off as [[Basement Rosechus|slaves]] to the [[Virginia]] and north and northward.

And we had a whole bunch of medishin [[Tobacky|medicianal supstances]] that were created within our times by our [[Chris and Religion#Chris the Shaman|witch doctors]], which I happen to have a witch doctor. His name is on my thing there, but [[Honor roll|I forgot memorize it.]] Which he comes from the Chandler Clan on my [[Bob Chandler|father's]] side. It was a good union, though, between my father meeting my mother for she comes from the [[Daniel Weston|English clan]], but we were here in America first and we had our own tortures. And through a whole bunch of trials and tribulations, we ended up walking the Trail Of Tears.

Which, beyond which, as we walked the trail, some of us wandered off the trail to be hidden from those that have considered us slaves. Unfortunately, thanks to our right— thanks to our guys, slavery has abolished altogether, including— including the [[Niggos|black slaves]]. Though I not say that, it was of an consasensus...

''[Chris suddenly changes from offensive Indian imitation to offensive urban patois]''

Hey, we're with you on this one dude we're with you on this one dudes. I mean, we were slaves as well back in the day. But we've managed to collect ourselves, and there only a few of us left within this [[America]] and mostly there are only partial regions with us, but there are orginisations of us Cherokees within states like Oklahoma and Tennesee. More information on this as well as our history on the Wikipedia. Also, we did go off out in battle after that practice was abolished. Of which we have purified our warriors before they could return to our village. We were fierce though. We were very very fierce.

But anyway, with that, don't mess with us. For we will [[CWC is Angry|shoot you]] [[Gun Comic|down]]. Pew! ''[Pantomimes shooting a bow and arrow]''

==See also==
*[[War Paint Video]]
*[[Cherokian Clan]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2270]]|nextlink=[[A Hike]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

PS3

2010-09-03T07:38:06Z

Marco:

{{taxpayermoney}}

[[Image:Sony playstation 3.jpg|thumb|A life upgrade.]]
[[Image:2ndLifeUpgrade.jpg|thumb|The PS3 gets slimmer while Chris gets fatter.]]

Chris's first [[Sony]] '''PlayStation 3''' ("purchased 17 March [[2007]]<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref>" [sic<ref>technically isn't possible, because the PS3 wouldn't be released until November that year</ref>] - [[The MovingFoward videos|28 August 2010]]) was his orginal "life upgrade." He wanted to win one in a contest, so he made [[Pixelated PS3|a video]] where he built one out of [[Pixelblocks]]. He would "throw out the cure for [[autism]]" for one.<ref>[[Pixelated PS3]]</ref> He eventually went ahead and bought one with taxpayer money from his [[monthly tugboat]], using one of his many collected credit cards. Following [[PS3#Molestations_and_other_PS3_damage|repeated PS3 abuse]], Chris eventually [[PS3#Good_night.2C_sweet_prince|destroyed]] his life upgrade.

Chris's replacement PS3 (2 [[September 2010]] - ) is his second life upgrade. Despite ceremoniously "[[The_MovingFoward_videos|MovingFoward]]" only a few days before, Chris could not live without his life upgrade and so reportedly wasted yet more of your tax dollars replacing it. May the frivolous [[PSN]] spending and hacking drama continue.{{cite}}

==PlayStation Network==
[[Image:Etc playstation.PNG|thumb|Confirmation emails, a testament to Chris' financial responsibility.]]

[[Chris]], being as irresponsible with [[Chris and money|money]] as he is, went into overdrive with this feature of the PS3's [[online]] capabilities. Chris has spent so much on the PSN it has contributed into most of the $2000 of his credit card debt (as of the [[Julie]] saga in early 2009). At present, that number is higher, at a little over a third of Chris's [[Monthly tugboat|annual income]].

You might ask yourself how he could spend that much and what he could spend it on. Chris seemingly buys everything possible, from game content to movies to several episodes of terrible harem [[anime]]. A list of Chris's PSN purchases reveals that he has even bought upgrades to games he doesn't even own.

Chris has spent at least '''$3405.22''' in YOUR [[Monthly tugboat|taxpayer dollars]].

=== Spending history ===
The following table chronicles Chris's deposits into his PlayStation Network "wallet" between April 2007 and February 2010, the period for which detailed records of his transactions are available (thanks to the work of expert hackers).

Some interesting patterns can be spotted in his spending habits. He was relatively thrifty for most of 2007 and into early 2008, when he still had a few other outlets for entertaining himself outside his home. There's a sharp spike around the time of his first ban from [[The GAMe PLACe]], though (and he might also have been binging to get over his "breakup" with Megan Schroeder, which happened that same spring). Likewise, it's perhaps not a coincidence that after Chris was permanently booted from the PLACe in the summer of 2008, he began spending a good deal more money on the PSN.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! '''Month
! '''Amount
! '''Month
! '''Amount
! '''Month
! '''Amount
! '''Month
! '''Amount
! '''Month
! '''Amount
|-
| February 2010
| '''$130.00
| July 2009
| '''$80.00
| December 2008
| '''$150.00
| May 2008
| '''$90.00
| October 2007
| '''$55.00
|-
| January 2010
| '''$90.00
| June 2009
| '''$170.00
| November 2008
| '''$110.00
| April 2008
| '''$16.02
| September 2007
| '''$35.00
|-
| December 2009
| '''$234.29
| May 2009
| '''$135.00
| October 2008
| '''$90.07
| March 2008
| '''$20.00
| August 2007
| '''$65.00
|-
| November 2009
| '''$215.00
| April 2009
| '''$225.00
| September 2008
| '''$90.00
| February 2008
| '''$20.00
| July 2007
| '''$25.00
|-
| October 2009
| '''$268.41
| March 2009
| '''$210.00
| August 2008
| '''$85.00
| January 2008
| '''$75.00
| June 2007
| '''$10.00
|-
| September 2009
| '''$132.36
| February 2009
| '''$125.00
| July 2008
| '''$120.00
| December 2007
| '''$25.00
| May 2007
| '''$35.00
|-
| August 2009
| '''$50.00
| January 2009
| '''$90.00
| June 2008
| '''$30.00
| November 2007
| '''$30.00
| April 2007
| '''$25.00
|}

=== Trophies ===

According to the [http://profiles.us.playstation.com/playstation/psn/profiles/Sonichu PSN profile for Sonichu], as of 21 August 2010, Chris has 1117 trophies. ''Note: Availability of Sonichu's trophy information is dependent on the proper functioning of the PlayStation Network. Information is not updated in real time.''

The games where he had over 50% progress so far include:

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|-
!align="left"|Game
!align="left"|Trophies
!align="left"|Progress
!align="left"|Comments
|-
| ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''
| 70
| 100%
| And he still can't coordinate his jumps, or design a good level.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:InFamous|inFamous]]''
| 50
| 100%
| A man dressed in yellow that shoots electricity? [[Sonichu|Hmmmmm...]]
|-
|''[[God of War]] III''
|36
|100%
|All that blood and gore couldn't stop Chris from grabbing all the trophies and deity boobies.
|-
|''God of War II''
|35
|100%
| From the God of War Collection.
|-
| ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic]]'s Ultimate Genesis Collection''
| 35
| 100%
| Another case of redundancy for most of the included games, especially the Sonic ones.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Linger In Shadows|Linger In Shadows]]''
| 16
| 100%
| Apparently, a demoscene production. ''Not'' remarkable. Most people already had 1000 gamerscore in ''[[wikipedia:Second Reality|Second Reality]]''. In 1993.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Flower_(video_game)|Flower]]''
| 14
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sam_%26_Max:_The_Devil%27s_Playhouse|Sam and Max: The Devil's Playhouse]] - Episode 1: The Penal Zone''
| 13
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Wheel_of_Fortune_(video_game)|Wheel of Fortune]]''
| 13
| 100%
| Truly, the apex of hi-def gaming.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Gunstar_Heroes|Gunstar Heroes]]''
| 12
| 100%
| Chris may have got 100% in Gunstar Heroes, but IRL he's a total zero.
|-
|''Sam and Max: The Devil's Playhouse - Episode 2: The Tomb of Sammun Mak
|12
|100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Buzz!|Buzz!]] Junior: Monsters''
| 11
| 100%
| "Junior" says it all.
|-
| ''Buzz! Junior: RoboJam''
| 11
| 100%
|
|-
|''Sam and Max: The Devil's Playhouse - Episode 4: Beyond the Alley of the Dolls
|11
|100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:.detuned|.detuned]]''
| 10
| 100%
| Another demoscene production. Again, we'd allege that Chris wouldn't get too far in Farbrausch's more famous interactive entertainment prod ''.kkrieger'' - not to even mention the largely .famous ''.the .product'', dammit!
|-
| ''Sam and Max: The Devil's Playhouse - Episode 3: They Stole Max's Brain
| 10
| 100%
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Mainichi Issho|Mainichi Issho]]''
| 7
| 100%
| A Japan-only release. Apparently just like ''[[Animal Crossing]]'', only more boring and even bigger of a grindfest.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Frogger_Returns|Frogger Returns]]''
| 4
| 100%
| ''One hundred percen—!'' ...Oh, it's four trophies for four levels.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Burnout_Paradise|Burnout Paradise]]''
| 93
| 91%
| It has cars. They can be driven. Chris thinks this game is up there among greatest games ever made, with likes of ''The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time''.<ref>[[Brutal Legend Plus]]</ref>
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Braid_(video_game)|Braid]]''
| 11
| 89%
| A game about a man who alters [[Time Void|time]] to rescue his [[sweetheart]]. Note that the end of the game reveals the main character to be [[Christian Weston Chandler|a stalker]]. It is, however, worth noting that Braid is a puzzle game, and not a simple one to play either, yet he still fully completed the game. This is perhaps the most definite proof that Chris isn't mentally retarded (or, at least, he knows how to use GameFAQs).
|-
| ''[[ModNation Racers]]''
|46
|82%
|A driving game that chris is terrible at. The levels that Chris have made so far are simply bad. In 500 online races Chris has only won 100; that shows Chris's skills.
|-
|''God of War''
|33
|82%
| Most of the trophies are simply earned by progressing through the game normally. The trophies he lacks are the ones that require you to complete actual challenges or completing the game in under 5 hours.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Heavy_rain|Heavy Rain]]''
| 53
| 80%
|
|-
| ''The Price Is Right''
|11
|76%
| Another real [[sonichu|masterpiece]] of hi-def gaming
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sonic_unleashed|Sonic Unleashed]]''
| 37
| 75%
| Due to the trophy data not visible to the public and people reporting hearsay as fact, a lot of people were under assumption that Chris had 100% of the trophies in ''Sonic 2006'' (which doesn't even have trophies). Now, we're equally perplexed by the fact that Chris has ''only'' 75% of trophies in a bona-fide 3D Sonic title.
|-
| ''[[Brutal Legend Plus|Brütal Legend]]''
| 46
| 74%
| \m/ [[Britney Spears]]! \m/
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Penny_Arcade_Adventures|Penny Arcade Adventures]]: OtRSPoD, Episode One''
| 11
| 71%
|
|-
| ''Penny Arcade Adventures: OtRSPoD, Episode Two''
| 11
| 71%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Noby_Noby_Boy|Noby Noby Boy]]''
| 9
| 71%
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Numblast|NUMBLAST]]''
|10
|71%
|NUMBLAST is a [[homos|colorful]] Japanese puzzle game
|-
| ''Buzz!: Quiz TV''
| 16
| 61%
| The first of the ''Buzz!'' games to appear on PS3. See also Chris's [[Quizzes]] for his MyBUZZ! stuff.
|-
| ''[[Emily_Date_Conversation_Transcript#Meet_the_Pickle_.2801:21:44_-_01:25:29.29|Watchmen]]''
| 8
| 57%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Uno_(video_game)|UNO]]''
| 10
| 52%
| Seriously?
|}

Comparing to the [[List of Chris's games|list of games he owns]], there was a bunch of them that he hadn't even booted up a single time. There are some games he had touched maybe once and then left to the wayside; for example, all of his ''BioShock'' trophies are from the beginning of the game, and he received all of them on October 23, 2008, over a couple of hours. (The logical conclusion is that the second level of ''BioShock'' will ''blow your mind.'') In public, he also prominently featured games he never really played; the [[PS3 History Level]] shows many games that he touched only a few times (''Mirror's Edge'' and ''BioShock'', for example, currently sit at 11% and 9% respectively), and in [[PS3 Tutorial for my fans|the PS3 tutorial]], Chris says he thinks ''PAIN'' is a "fun" game, yet he let it sit at 0%.

=== Hacking ===

As a result of his online notoriety, his poor choice of passwords, and his innate gullibility, Chris’s PlayStation Network account was hacked or otherwise wrested from his control on multiple occasions. [[BlueSpike]], in his guise as Chris’s sweetheart [[Julie]], was able to convince Chris to break the first fundamental rule of cybersecurity and "share" his password in [[BlueSpike_PSN_Chat_3|February 2009]], which was later used as a wedge to control and torment Chris. That summer, [[Jack Thaddeus]] seized the account, resulting in the infamous [[Chris humps his PS3|eight minutes of console sex]] and detailed revelations concerning Chris’s insane online spending habits.

Chris managed to keep control of his accounts for a surprisingly long time after his run-in with Thaddeus, but his luck ran out on 24 [[February 2010]], thanks to [[Surfshack Tito|a certain <s>nigger</s> Hawaiian]].

==Fanboyism==
<center>{{#ev:youtube|ws9MqtHzcz4}}</center>

{{quote|So… good reason to get a PlayStation 3 system… of at least 60 GB or higher! 'Cause, uh, y'know, they have four USB ports, the memory card slots, and able to access the Internet wirelessly. While 40 GB and lower: two USB ports, no memory card slots, and requires an Ethernet cable to connect to the Internet. And… LittleBigPlanet! And as you all know from my sponsorship video, ev— most of the videos I put up on YouTube were spon— were sponsored by Sony, and their PlayStation Eye, and their PlayStation 3.|[[Chris Chan Update 13 October 2008|Chris failing to tell us what the "good reason" is]]}}
{{quote|And yet, at the beginning, during the "Console War", I feel that I have chosen Truly Wise. Sony has truly helped this soul better his life, and many others as well. And with every new update, the PS3 and PSP grow more and more better alongside me. Playstaion isn't just a Station to Play, it's the station to Play and Truly Enrich Yourself. Higher Definition equals Better Points of View. Talking over the internet from a sancturious comfort is truly an enriching luxury. Now I have put behind me my regrets of Life without Playstation. And with Priceless Experiences, an honest sense of satisfaction. And a more mature winning attitude. Sony's Playstation 3 and Playstation Portable are Truly a place I can call... My Digital HOME. :D Happy Anniversary, Playstation 3; you are Truly the Best Life Upgrade Ever|Chris, fellating the faceless angel of overpriced electronics in [[PS3 History Level]] speech bubbles}}

[[Image:Playstation Patrol W CWC's Car.JPG|thumb|right|[[Son-Chu]] camped outside a Playstation Cave]]
Chris pops giant boners for PS3. He makes trolls on /v/ look like mild enthusiasts with his hatred of the [[Hex Bawx]].

==Molestations and other PS3 damage==

On 24 [[July 2009]], a video of [[Chris humps his PS3|Chris humping his PS3]] was leaked. It is generally believed that physically molesting electronics may often shorten their lifespan; hard drives and optical drives are particularly prone to breaking under such physical [[stress]].

On 5 [[May 2010]], Chris [[I Pimp My Ride|posted a video]] in which he bragged about removing a "bug" from his PS3, thanks to a [[white knight]] who tipped him off. While Chris did apparently understand that the component was actually the system's wireless networking antenna, he removed it anyway. It seems to have had no effect on his ability connect his PS3 to the internet, indicating that he either uses a wired ethernet connection or he realized how fucked he was and put it back in place. In any case, he voided his console's warranty... just as planned.

On 27 [[August 2010]], Chris [[Stardate, August 27, 2010|posted a solemn video]] where he explains how he inadvertently formatted his own PS3, erasing over 3 years of his life. Through repeated abuse (see above), Chris's PS3 was misbehaving, prompting him to contact [[Sony]] tech support. They apparently guided him through an attempt to fix corrupted files on the PS3's hard drive, but fortunately this did not go to plan and Chris was given a choice to reformat his drive, which he accepted.

In the video, Chris blamed a "misunderstanding" between him and the support representative as the reason why he ended up formatting his drive, but it's more likely that Chris [[Autism|wasn't even listening]] to the things the representative was saying, being more concerned with being able to use his life upgrade again as soon as possible. This dubious series of events was disputed by CWC experts, who suspect that Chris may not have been his [[List of Chris's lies|TRUE and HONEST self]]. However, his PSN account activity suggested he had indeed deleted fucking everything.

==Good night, sweet prince==

[[File:Cameragroup004.jpg|thumb|Trivia: Chris still keeps VHS tapes in the clutter of his [[room]]]]

On 29 August 2010, trolls obtained [[The MovingFoward videos]] where Chris finally put the nail in his life upgrade's coffin by beating it up with an edging stone and then running it over with his [[car]]. In the third video, Chris claimed to have tested his PS3 and confirmed it no longer started up but still "went into standby mode". He then used some scissors to repeatedly stab the console's remains. Trolls also obtained [[The_MovingFoward_videos#Destruction_Gallery|photographs of the console]] in various states of destruction.

The next day, [[ItIsFinished.MOV|another video]] appeared wherein Chris took the crushed, stabbed, and disassembled parts of his PS3, laid them out in his driveway, and ran them over with his car yet again (repeatedly) for good measure.

==Other oddities==

Chris appears to have put at least some of the games he has bought in blue Blu-Ray cases instead of keeping them in original retail cases.<ref>Seen, for example, in [[Brutal Legend]].</ref> He even does so in ''[[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles]]'' advertisement. This peculiar practice is explained in Chris's [[PS3 History Level]]: Chris buys Blu-Ray game cases from eBay and switches them over because "It's THINNER than the Clear Original PS3 Disc Cases; MORE SHELF SPACE for MORE GAMES."

==See also==
*[[Chris-chan Discusses...]] - a video interview with Chris conducted over the PS3's video chat service.
*[[List of Chris's games]] - detailing his entire game collection.
*[[List of Chris's PSN video downloads]]
*[[List of Chris's PSN game downloads]]
*[[Pixelated PS3]] - Chris attempt to build one from [[Lego]] and [[Pixelblocks]].
*[[PS3 History Level]]
*[[PSEye]]
*[[PSP]]
*[[PSN Blogs]] - an archive of Chris's posts.
*[[Sonichu Home Club]] - because Chris loves Sony so much, he uses their ''Second Life'' ripoff.
*[[Sony]]
*[[Hex Bawx|Xbox 360]] - the Kryptonite of Chris's video gaming.
*[[ItIsFinished.MOV]] - GAME OVER.

==Sauces==
<references/>

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3WQ3QiJMWU Boyfriend-Free PS3]

[[Category:Things Chris has had Sex with]]
[[Category:Video Games]]
[[Category:Sony]]
[[Category:PS3]]

The MovingFoward videos

2010-09-03T07:36:23Z

Marco:

[[Image:ARCH.jpg|center|300px]]

[[File:Cwcps3.jpg|thumb|One lucky console]]

The '''MovingFoward videos''' are a compilation of three leaked videos ('''MovingFoward''', '''MovingFurtherFoward''', '''100_2209.MOV''') where [[Chris]] physically destroys his [[PS3]]. Having first followed [[Stardate, August 27, 2010|good hard drive disposal practice]], Chris says a few choice words before destroying the console with a brick, [[Son-Chu|his car]], and some scissors. Some photographs of the console in various states of destruction were also leaked.

Chris says that after smashing his console and driving over it with his car, he plugged it in again, apparently to prove that it would no longer function. He seems to have been unaware of the [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|danger of fire]] or [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric]] shock involved (or perhaps, in his despondent state, he simply didn't care).

Many [[trolls]] had come up with theories as to why Chris smashed his beloved Life Upgrade. Eventually, it was revealed in a [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|communication between Chris and some high-profile trolls]] that Chris wanted to claim a very large monetary reward for its destruction. To no one's surprise, not only was there supposedly a reward waiting for such an act like this, but it has been completely in vain on Chris's part.

Interesting to note here is that, like the snake he tried to run over, the cardboard box and the [[clown doll]], it takes Chris three tries AND [[ItIsFinished.MOV|a coup de grace the next day]] just to [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|BREAK DEAD]] his PS3.

== Video ==

{{Infobox/video
| name = MovingFoward, MovingFurtherFoward & 100_2209.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|2rVhTdCIJc8}}
| stardate = 29 August 2010
| subject = {{Video games|text}}
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| shirt = {{HighSchoolShirt|text}}, Sleeveless Pokéshirt
| previous = [[Stardate, August 27, 2010]]
| next = [[ItIsFinished.MOV]]

}}

== Transcript ==

===Part one (MovingForward)===

[''An opening title card appears, which reads "MovingForward." We cut to Chris, who is standing around outside and shakily filming himself with a handheld camera.'']

Saturday, August 28, 2010.

[''Chris removes his [[glasses]].'']

I make this video as a tribute to [[Gal-pal|what I have lost]]. But also from which I have lost, I have [[Hair|lost something that was of important value]], but I am able to let go. It is the [[Song of Christian|spirit of myself, of which was very lonely]]. But now move on, to a [[Video games|much brighter future]]. And now for the feature presentation on this video. What you are about to see is [[April 16 Fetish Vids|uncensored and unedited]].

[''He moves the camera to show his PS3, which has a case cover plastered in artwork of himself and [[Sonichu]].'']

My PlayStation 3, here in the back yard.

[''He opens the access port to show the hard drive.'']

The hard drive still in there. Formatted as it was. And for a memento, I'm keeping the cover.

[''He removes the case cover, complete with the original [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles]] illo, and puts it to one side. Then he focuses the camera on himself again.'']

Again, this [[CWCFlyingElephants|very graphic]], so if you are weak in the stomach, especially as a gamer, look away, and I mean no [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|disrespect to Sony Computer Entertainment America]]. Maker of the fine product.

[''Chris mumbles something unintelligible amid the noise of moving the camera. He then sets the camera down so it is focused on his PS3.'']

Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. [[Chris and English|I bid you fond...faredieu.]] Adieu. Fond farewell...

[''Chris puts on a pair of work gloves and picks up a piece of landscaping brick while an airplane flies overhead. He then uses the brick to lightly tap his PS3 for the better part of a minute, never raising the brick over his head and only cracking the outer case, [[Chris and health|stopping a few times to rest]].'']

[[Chris and reality|Crushed... Unplayable...]] The deed is done.

===Part two (MovingFurtherForward)===

[''Cut to a second title card, "MovingFurtherForward." It is nighttime. The camera is looking at Chris's driveway, in front of his running car. The headlights allow us to see Chris place the PS3 in front of the left front wheel of Son-Chu. He gets in the car, backs up, and pulls forward, running over the PS3. Then he backs up over it and pulls forward over it again.]

Well, you get the idea anyway. It's useless. Broken.

===Part three (REALLYMovingForward)===

[''Cut to a third title card, "'100_2209.MOV' (A.K.A. 'REALLYMovingForward')." We are in Chris's bedroom. The camera shows us the wreckage of his PS3, very much the worse for wear. In addition to beating the hell out of it, he appears to have cracked the case and broken it down to its component parts, which he shows us by panning the camera around.'']

Ah. Well, I [[6 June 2010|run it over with a car]] and smashed it with a brick. Ugh. I thought I hit it on the metal part and the heavy plastic, but still, when I look at, still, when I plugged it in, it did not turn on. Actually, it went into standby mode, but that's all, as far as it went. That's all it went. So right now I'm gonna finish the job. Finish the job.

[''Chris sets down the camera to show himself and the PS3 parts. He then picks up a pair of scissors, which he uses to stab repeatedly at bits of his former console. Partway through the stab-fest, he unfolds scissors and goes at it two-fisted. Tiring after about 45 seconds, he folds up his scissors and sifts through the debris.'']

[[Duck|Look at that bend.]] [[Chris and anger|Broke a whole buncha stuff.]] Now you tell me it's still good! It ain't now!

[''Chris stands up and the video cuts off.'']

== Destruction gallery ==

In addition to the poor quality video footage of the PS3's destruction, numerous photographs of the before and after have been leaked:

<center><gallery>
File:PreCar1.JPG|Pre-Car
File:PreCar2.JPG|Car
File:PostCar.JPG|Post-Car
</gallery></center>
<center><gallery>
File:100 2208.JPG
File:100 2210.JPG
File:100 2211.JPG
File:100 2212.JPG
File:100 2213.JPG
File:100 2214.JPG
File:100 2215.JPG
File:Cameragroup002.jpg
File:Cameragroup003.jpg
File:Cameragroup004.jpg
</gallery></center>
== Fan videos ==
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tribute To Chris-Chan's PS3
| video = {{#ev:youtube|lFIVUtNszoE}}
| Stardate = 01 September 2010
| Maker = MountieFromHell
| Video Type = Music video
}}

== See also ==
*[[PS3]]
*[[Sony]]
*[[ItIsFinished.MOV]]
*[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Stardate, August 27, 2010]]|nextlink=[[ItIsFinished.MOV]]}}

{{LeakedVideos}}
{{Game Videos}}

Talk:EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW

2010-08-28T06:03:15Z

Marco:

I am transcribing this BITCH. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 01:14, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:*Fucking done. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:21, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

Ahahahaha, Chris is going to organize the high school reunion by himself. This is awesome as it is, but we can't let this opportunity to troll him go by. [[User:EtonpilfAnetah|EtonpilfAnetah]] 01:18, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

How do we know that a reunion has already been organised, and that Chris was not invited? [[User:Sorrid Snake|Sorrid Snake]] 01:29, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

oh, i did some digging around. i don't have it on me, but i'm 95% sure there was one planned. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 01:30, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

I think the single funniest thing in this video is that Chris implies he thinks the reason he cant break into the video game industry is because of trolls working for Nintendo. Also, i'm pretty sure he wants a reunion so he can hook up, I'd imagine the last women willing to associated with him were in highschool. Also, I dunno what to do with this, do whatever if you want, just doodling.[[File:Names.PNG|thumb|center]] [[User:Pinefresh|Pinefresh]] 02:40, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

Need any on scene reporters for this shit. I don't live that far away from Manchester High.[[User:ShinGokuIAM|ShinGokuIAM]] 05:23, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

* Sure. I'd post it here, but you Google it yourself....(chris if you're reading this you're a lazy shit). If the date is november then you got it. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 07:01, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

I checked it out a couple months ago, and I didn't see anything that would indicate that they had planned a reunion. Besides, if I remember correctly, Chris was on one of the mailing lists to be informed if something did happen. Given that few, if any, of his former classmates are aware of his internet notoriety, I doubt that he would've been left out of the loop.--[[User:Racer X|Racer X]] 06:56, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

* Well, I have an address and date and time and everything. I'm sure that was probably a fake Chris... [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 07:01, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

* Oh, I see. You were posting your answer as I was posting my hypothesis. Leave it to the great Clyde Cash to be one step ahead of Inspector Detector and I. --[[User:Racer X|Racer X]] 07:05, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

== Side note. ==

One interesting thing I noticed while transcribing this BITCH. Chris repeats his number for emphasis- does he think YouTube is live? Like live TV? He seems to do almost all of his videos 'on the first take', mistakes included, so this would seem plausible. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:20, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:*It's because doing multiple takes and editing is SO HARD and WAY TOO MUCH WORK. Also one take is much more TRUE and HONEST. Someone gets into it somewhere on the CWCki, but I forget where.--[[User:RTBHBX|RTBHBX]] 06:01, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

== Transcribing his shit english? ==

We all know Chris can't present himself verbally, but it's getting to the point where it can be difficult to follow the transcription for his videos since they seem to be written out fairly close to verbatim to his actual speech. Since the transcribing seems to be done by a small group of people (thanks for that, by the way) it's fairly consistent, but even so, should there be some kind of guideline written up for it? Such as what mispronounciations should be included, what stuttering to include, that sort of thing? -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 20:47, 27 August 2010 (PDT) (signature added later for clarification purposes).

:*First of all, sign your posts (it's just <nowiki>--~~~~</nowiki> at the end of your post). Secondly, some videos are transcribed like that- I transcribed part of Mumble 6 that way, mainly because it was Chris and Julie cybering and I really didn't need to go over and over that just to make sure I got every bit of his spastic stuttering correct. Speaking personally, I prefer to make the transcription as faithful as possible- including stuttering and mistakes. I believe that's the most 'faithful' way to render articles where Chris speaks, including this one. That's one of the perks about being a transcriber- you get to pick your style. If the inclusion of the stuttering (etc) really annoys you, the only thing I can suggest is to take a stab at the vast library of untranscribed audio we have available and transcribe it to your liking. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:24, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

::*Sorry about the unsigned, Slipped my mind. And I would probably be a bad choice for transcribing, as due to my personal history I use a spastic mix of English and American spelling, among other things. This wasn't intended as a criticism, just asking if there should be a general guideline. Like I said in the original post, the work of the transcribers is greatly appreciated. Sometimes it's just... painful to listen to him, and it's a lot easier to just read over his idiocy. -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 20:47, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

==Hair==
So far, I've only looked at the thumb but from the image it really seems like his MPB is proceeding just as planned.
EDIT: Looked at the first few seconds. It's clear as day now. Chris is going bald really quickly. Anyone care to estimate how long he's got/ I would, but I don't know how to. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 08:04, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

:Think that as his MPB progresses we can chronicle his receding hairline? I'd be interested to see how quickly it is falling out now compared to the last few years. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 10:18, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

: I don't know how long he has but it really doesn't look healthy. It looks greasy and stringy and I honestly wonder how long it's been since he's bathed or washed his hair.
Either way, I'd say that he'll be completely bald by November. Just looking at it now compared to pictures from FAF, there's a very noticeable difference. - [[User:Captainhowdy|Captainhowdy]] 10:24, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

::Oh, this ties rather nicely into what I said about his [[CWCki:Speculation/What health problems will Chris develop first|endocrine/integumentary troubles]]. He definitely has androgenic alopecia, and the last three years have been something of a turning point for him; if you've noticed he's lost nearly all of his hair in the temples(which is where it's first lost), and about half the area in the frontal, it's at about a Norwood3 now. As to when he’ll lose the rest, well, It's hard to give a set schedule on hair loss as it's so dependent on specifics, with some individuals it retreats to a certain extent and then stabilizes(bob for instance), or it might just progress at an increasing rate. Chris definitely seems to be the later: his life style is going to have a greater impact as he ages, and his increasing body fat means that his body puts together more hormones ,DHT(hair loss skin problems) included, this has a disproportional effect because Chris seems to be sensitive to DHT(which is hereditary) and other hormones can convert to DHT but DHT can’t convert to anything else. You can see how this has worked by looking at a this from a case study standpoint: most of the loss he had from 18-26 was at the ends temples which is in line with the adult hair line men develop; past 08 though he’s lost all his hair from the temples, and afterwards started losing it in the frontal(middle forehead) at a accelerating pace, essentially we can consider that to be the full onset. If I had to give an estimate on how it’s going to progress it’d be that his hair in the temples area will have gone to his vertex in about six months, and he’ll lose the frontal in that time to a year (If you look you can see that it’s patchy in the front, which means it’s micronzing and a becomes progressively thinner every hair cycle, that's why you see it get worse every few months), the next likely point of thing is going to be at the vertex which depending on factors might take as much as a couple of years to clear out. I think you could say with confidence that he’ll have advanced alopecia by the time he’s 30, namely that the clearings in his temples frontal and vertex will have linked into one larger sea of bald.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 11:39, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
*Cool story, bro. Actually, i was looking for someone to say pretty much this. That seems to fit with my prediction range nicely, so that's pretty cool. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 11:45, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:Lolk, sorry about the TLDR, a simple answer just seemed misleading. I think it's pretty interesting that Chris seems to be trying his hand at a combover, so he's probably noticed. I wonder if he's going to try meds... given how extensive his hair loss is now(temple hair has been gone too long), he'd need a transplant to reverse it.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 12:05, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
::Chris can't even go bald with dignity. The worst part is that he still thinks he has a full head of hair. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 12:12, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

==Trollbusters==

Hmm, I wonder where Chris is getting his Trollbuster idea from? I've poked Google and beyond a website that shuts down patents, most of the Trollbuster gatherings were failures. Which isn't totally surprising considering who we're dealing with here, but still. My guess, though, is that he's probably either a) met a group on PSN or b) decided to come up with it himself.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 08:36, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
*The answer is B.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 08:41, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

** Ironically enough, the real troll busters are a group of lawyers that specialize in patent law: "[http://www.troll-busters.com/ Troll-Busters]" --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 09:52, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
*** That website is as terrible as their services invaluable. ... Anyhow: given there's a Trollbusters truck with a no-trolls logo, we can assume he's riffing on the more-popular Ghostbusters for once. You'd think he'd put the no-troll logo on the t-shirt instead of a block of text, but then Chris is a lazy idiot, so! [[User:EnsignDisposable|EnsignDisposable]] 10:00, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

Next thing you know he's going to be talking about the cyberpolice and how consequences will never be the same...--[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 10:20, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

==Alumni Class==
So I checked online and found that Chris actually has 8 accounts with the alumniclass.com website. While you don't HAVE to pay for membership ($20) they give you a limited profile where you can't really do anything if you don't pay. Chris may have paid for a number of the memberships. This is really sad for Chris because, using a limited profile, I was able to find the reunion date and place in a few seconds. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 10:27, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
* So, was Chris deliberately not invited to the reunion, or is it just that he hasn't found out about the reunion because he's a retard? [[User:EtonpilfAnetah|EtonpilfAnetah]] 10:40, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:99% chance that those accounts are trolls. Learn to spot 'em... Besides, despite just about everyone saying they know the date/location, NO ONE has offered those bits of info. Instead of so [[ego|self-assuredly]] saying that Chris missed out and was uninvited, why don't we offer proof of this claim? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 11:00, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
::Fine: 504 Old Lynchburg Rd Charlottesville, VA 22903, November 08, 2010, Noon, I can even put in the contact info. I withheld it because I thought Chris might be watching this. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 11:28, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:::Well... I stand corrected, then. I'm fairly sure Chris is already well-aware of this in any case. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 11:39, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:::: November will be so cash. [[User:CaptainCanuck|CaptainCanuck]] 13:34, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

==Deliberately not invited?==

I wasn't "invited" to my five-year reunion because I'd moved a mile away from where I lived in high-school in the interim and I wasn't very connected socially with anyone from my class before or after. I found out about it, I showed up, I paid the $20, and that was that. I'm not sure anyone is really invited to their high-school reunion—it's put on and they're just informed of its existence. The invitation is implicit.

A more likely scenario is that no one was wont to research the current whereabouts of like 300 other people so they just organized the damned thing and didn't make it a secret. Chris might even have seen the information about it on the Internet not been able to wrap his retarded, autism-riddled brain around the idea that just because it's on the Internet doesn't make it the work of trolls just because he has a unique history of being trolled.

He might just think what many of you seem to think—that if it were a real reunion, someone would've contacted him if they wanted him to come. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 11:17, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

*You know, ''I'''d be pretty fucking paranoid if I found out that for the last two years of my life the only people I've had contact with were people who hate me and enjoy watching me fail, and that most, if not all, of the major events in my life in that period were orchestrated by said people. Just saying. --[[User:DStecks|DStecks]] 12:54, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:I guess it's true what they say, then: ''you're just like Chris.''

:No, um... what's interesting about all the trolling—at least as it's been presented publicly—is how fucking obvious it is that the trolls never act like normal people would and that despite how bluntly he's told that he's not acting right and they're not acting right, he plows forward only to be humiliated and frustrated again without ever learning any lessons about how people behave. This whole problem could be answered with a phone call: surely someone the high school staff knows about the reunion even though the school itself probably has nothing to do with organizing it, but Chris insists on barreling forward with his ridiculous YouTube videos which have never helped him before and which he has no reason to believe anyone involved's going to see, before or after the reunion because Chris and Co. go on forcefully believing the first thought that oozes into their heads and go on defending it to the death for no reason.

:tl;dr Chris consistently trusts people he shouldn't and doesn't trust people he should for no reason and this is just another indication of that. It's on and he's invited—he just refuses to acknowledge it. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 13:42, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

{{Not A Forum}}

Why is it so hard for people to sign your posts?! It's just 4 ~ in a row. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 14:08, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:Every post in this section has been signed. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 15:26, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
::And I was supposed to know that the paragraphs all belonged to you and not to a person who doesn't sign their posts....how? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 16:51, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:One click actually. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 15:34, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

== Real Troll Busters ==

There is an actual group called [http://www.trollbuster.com/ Troll Busters]. It's in "patent reexamination services" which I have no idea what means. Either way, the important part remains: they have a copyright and a trademark on the name Troll Busters and they are not related to internet trolls at all. Judging by his recent Modnation creations he's trying to make some franchise out of his Trollbusters. Poor dumb Chris can't even google anymore. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 20:37, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

== New Subject Matter? ==

Should there be a new tag involving real life? I would've said high school, but even with these two recent videos, it's too early to tell if he'll continue making videos once in a while, let alone those involving the high school reunion. --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 23:03, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

Matthew Nobles call

2010-08-17T01:42:57Z

Marco:

[[File:127539439799.jpg|thumb|Soon at a GAMe PLACe near you]]

On 10 [[August 2010]], Alec Benson Leary, posing as Matthew Noble, a [[GAMe PLACe]] employee, called [[Bob Chandler]] and discussed [[Chris's]] encounter with [[Michael Snyder]] in [[June 2010]]. The phone call is enlightening as it reveals a number of things concerning Bob and his views of Chris and those he talks to. These include that he never knew of the trespassing incident in June and that, for some unknown reason, he believes Chris's trolling incidents are a conspiracy based in the GAMe PLACe, with the help of some [[homos|gays]], no less.

==Transcript==
'''Bob:''' Hello? 
'''Matthew:''' Uh, hello, is this Robert Chandler? 
'''Bob:''' Yes? 
'''Matthew:''' Hello? 
'''Bob:''' Who is this? 
'''Matthew:''' Hi, hi, Mr. Chandler. Hi, my name is, uh, Matthew Noble, I think you just tried to call me back, I think I left you a message? 
'''Bob:''' Y-yes, what-what's your problem? 
'''Matthew:''' Well um, actually um I wanted to talk to you about something. Um, I'm an employee at the GAMe PLACe. Uh, I apologize for calling you so long after the incident occurred but, uh, given your son's continued harassment of our store I felt we needed to speak to you- 
'''Bob:''' The uh- the gaming place now? Uhh... 
'''Matthew:''' The GAMe PLACe. 
'''Bob:''' This place down town? By the Omni? 
'''Matthew:''' Correct. Correct. 
'''Bob:''' Ok... Ok... Now what's- What's- 
'''Matthew:''' Well- 
'''Bob:''' What's the problem? 
'''Matthew:''' Well um, I'm sure you're aware of uh, the little incident your son, ah, Christian had when he came to our store, um, early in June. 
'''Bob:''' I didn't know he had been to your store [[6 June 2010|early in June.]] 
'''Matthew:''' Um, when he attempted to ge- 
'''Bob:''' I knew he- 
'''Matthew:''' Oh, you were unaware of- 
'''Bob:''' He- I knew he, uh, had some, a lot of problems with you people several years ago. [Matthew attempts to answer, Bob continues over him] 
'''Matthew''' [Interrupted]: Well, uh, what happened was 
'''Bob''' [Continuing]: When you basically kicked him out and everything else for no reason of his own. 
'''Barb:''' [In the background]: And his mother. 
'''Bob:''' And his mother. And everybody else. I don’t really like your place, now what’s it gon- I didn't know he'd been there in June. Now tell me about this. 
'''Matthew:''' Well, basically what happened was he came in, he wanted to talk to our manager, Mike, about getting himself unbanned. Um, Mike refused to speak with him about the matter. 
'''Bob:''' Well, I think that's the Mike that threw him out. Mike's been persecuting him for years and I don't like Mike. I'd like to speak to the owner of the place I think lives up here, up the road from me. In Madison or somewhere. This whole thing is a setup from the very beginning with my son. Now I don- didn't like it then and I still don't like it. Now what happened in June? [Barb, inaudible] 
'''Matthew''' [Interrupted several times]: Well, Sir the point is that- Sir, I... Sir. Well after he left, uh, when he couldn't get himself unbanned, he came back several days later and was taking pictures of people in the store- 
'''Bob:''' [[Chris and the law|Well that's not illegal!]] 
'''Matthew:''' Um, one of the patrons... He... Some people felt that he was threatening them, to be honest. One woman said that he was taking [[Pedofork|pictures of her son]]. I don't know if that's true or not, but uh, Mike was there and he became angry and called the [[Jerkops|police]] because your son was trespassing 
'''Bob:''' Well he hadn't told them he- didn't come in there, it's a business place. Now, Mike, and [[Megan]] are the ones that conspired together with a couple of other people- kids there that I think were [[Homos|gay]], to persecute and torment Christian for years. Ok, I don't like Mike. I would like to talk to the owner of the store. I could really tell him about the [[Niggos|people]] he employs there. Ok, I could tell him a lot. 
'''Barb''' [In the background]: Megan lied. 
'''Matthew:''' Sir... Well, regardless of that sir, I don't know about any of that all I know is that your son was banned from the store and he trespassed 
'''Bob''' [Talking over Matthew]: Well regardless of that, that all figures within to this stuff. That all figures into this stuff. It certainly shouldn't and what should- It certainly should- 
'''Matthew:''' Well that certainly- But I just called to- Sir I called to inform you- I called to inform you that even though the police came and made your son sign a trespassing notice that he continued to harass our store online. That's what I called to inform you of. 
'''Bob:''' Well he probably- People are harassing him from all over the world! Let me tell you something fella, you know what some damn crazy fools that I think started at your store with Megan, and Mike, and two or three more. You know what they just did a week ago? They just broke into his [[Money|checking account]], got his checking account numbers and routing numbers they- they broke into his Best Buy Mastercard number, and they stole his ID, and- and all of his uh... Password information they went into that Best Buy checking account, trying to ruin his credit, and made a payoff on a check that had no funds in the checking account. Which got him a whole bunch uh- of of non-sufficient fund fees. Now this all transpired a week ago. Now I'm not going to listen to your petty stuff, OK? You have people including Mike, and I can tell you two [[Lucas|more]] [[Mimms|names]], but I can't think of 'em right now but the third one is Megan. And I'm sure you've heard of Megan or know Megan, right there in the store. 
'''Matthew:''' I've heard about Megan. Sir, I don't understand why you're not concerned about your son trespassing 
'''Bob:''' They're the people that are terrorizing Christian! They're the people that are [[Twin_Falling_Towers|terrorizing]] Christian! Ok? 
'''Matthew:''' This really has nothing to do with the GAMe PLACe, sir. I just called to inform you about your son trespassing. 
'''Bob:''' It has something to do with the GAMe PLACe because that's the pla- Well you're from the GAMe PLACe, right? 
'''Matthew:''' Sir, the GAMe PLACe didn't break into his bank accounts. I don't know why you're telling me about this. 
'''Bob:''' Well, we think that people that come to your place do, including one of your employees named [[Manajerk|Mike]]. 
'''Matthew:''' Well, we don't control all of our customers. 
'''Bob:''' Including one of your employees named Mike. Now, if you would like to have me talk to your owner I would be glad to- and my wife would be glad to go to a meeting with him about your place and how it's [[Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens|corrupting]] the whole neighborhood! 
'''Matthew:''' I kind of doubt that Mike himself is the guy that broke into your son's account. I kind of doubt that, sir. I just called to inform you that your son trespassed. Sir, your son was banned from the store and he came back and [Inaudible] 
'''Bob:''' No but he and Megan and that group- Fine! Send us a letter! Send us a letter! Send me a letter, sir! Ok? I don't know who you are. Do you work for the store? 
'''Matthew:''' Well I know tha- I overheard that the police, when he was talking to the police I overheard him say that he was very adamant that he didn't want you to be told about this. He wanted his- said something about his [[Rocky|counselor]]. 
'''Bob:''' Well- Do you work for the store? 
'''Matthew:''' Yes I do sir. 
'''Bob:''' Do you work for the store? Can you answer the question? 
'''Matthew:''' I just said that I do, sir. 
'''Bob:''' I beg your pardon? 
'''Matthew:''' W-What question sir? I missed your question, sir. 
'''Bob:''' Do you work for the GAMe PLACe? 
'''Matthew:''' I just answered that, sir. 
'''Bob:''' No you didn't. Do you work for the GAMe PLACe? 
'''Matthew:''' I said, "Yes I do, sir." I answered that three times in a row. 
'''Bob:''' Ok, what is your position at the GAMe PLACe? 
'''Matthew:''' I'm an employee of theirs, sir. I'm a supervisor. 
'''Bob:''' You're a supervisor. Now what does that exactly mean? That mean you're a shift manager? 
'''Matthew:''' Yes. 
'''Bob:''' Yes, ok. Now, will you tell me the owner's name, or do I have to subpoena it? 
'''Matthew:''' Sir [sigh] look, I- honestly I'm getting a little tired of this sir. I'm just calling to inform your son trespassed and he's gonna [[Diary#July_2005|get arrested]] 
'''Bob:''' Well sir I'm getting a little tired of your place. Ok? I don't want to be harassed by your place. 
'''Matthew:''' Fair enough. We don’t like your son harassing us. 
'''Bob:''' You left me a pretty threatening message on the thing to start with. On my telephone. 
'''Matthew:''' What? Sir, I left a message saying I had a sensitive matter to discuss with you. How is that threatening? 
'''Bob:''' Yeah, but it was your tone of voice and attitude. 
'''Matthew:''' Sir, I didn't have an attitude. I was perfectly polite. 
'''Bob:''' Oh, ye- No. No you weren't. 
'''Barb:''' Get his name. 
'''Matthew:''' I don't know how to disagree with that, sir. 
'''Bob:''' How do you spell your last name? How do you spell your last name? 
'''Matthew:''' Nobles. N-O- Sir. This isn't threatening. I feel that it was irresponsible of us not to inform Christian's parents. That’s why I called. To inform you of his trespassing. 
'''Bob:''' Well... Just wait a minute now. 
'''Matthew:''' He wanted us to talk to his counselor instead. 
'''Bob:''' 'Cause when was he told- N-O-B-E-L or N-O-B-L-E? 
'''Matthew:''' I wasn't there the initial time years ago when he was banned, sir. All I know is he was there when um- 
'''Bob:''' Is it N-O-B-E-L or N-O-B-L-E? 
[Pause] 
'''Matthew:''' Sir... 
'''Bob:''' Sir! How do you spell your last name? 
'''Matthew:''' I'm- I really don't feel like answering these questions, sir. You're giving me the third degree for no- 
'''Bob:''' You can answer a simple- you can answer a simple question. Well you- You told me your name, now how do you spell it? 
'''Matthew:''' You've been yelling at me this entire time, sir. I don't feel like, frankly giving you my name- 
'''Bob:''' Just spell your name and I won't yell at you! 
'''Barb:''' You were not yelling! [Inaudible] 
'''Matthew:''' That’s a really... Silly requirement, sir. 
'''Barb:''' He's not yelling at you! 
'''Matthew:''' I'm just trying to talk- 
'''Barb:''' Spell your last name! 
'''Matthew:''' He has been yel- 
'''Barb:''' Spell your last name! Hey! Who're you? 
'''Matthew:''' [Sigh] I've already given my name. I'm- 
'''Barb:''' You have not! What is your first name? 
'''Bob:''' Noble is his last name. I don't know how you spell it. 
'''Barb:''' Matthew Noble. N-O-B-E-L. What's your phone number? [REDACTED] That's a weird number. OK, now what is it you want? 'Cause it sounds like eh- You're- You're trying to uh- uhm- uh- Harass us and get something out of us. And we don't want nothing to do with you. [Bob says "like that again" and "GAMe PLACe" loudly in background, possibly yelling at Chris] 'Cause you- Just because you- I don't know wha- if you work at the GAMe PLACe or not. I can't see you, I'm not down there. And yo- 
[Cuts off abruptly] 

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?0qocazgbb2qbp7m Audio download]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6jW_zAAKBxw YouTube]

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Phone calls]]

RandomHumor1

2010-07-02T18:38:32Z

Marco:

On June 25, Chris uploaded '''RandomHumor1''', a two-part [[Flipnote Hatena]] animation that steals mercilessly from [[Peanuts]]. While the animation is supposed to be [[random-access humor]], the dialogue is stolen almost verbatim from the Charlie Brown and Snoopy Show episode [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHDnc19mHv0/ "Sally at School"].

==Description==
{{quotebox|[:)] This is just something silly and random; no meaning whatsoever.}}

== Part One ==
The first of the two animations, [http://flipnote.hatena.com/5348F770A0A92AE8@DSi/movie/A92AE8_09D8A92F380B0_002?in=user/ RandomHumor1Part1], depicts a sister showing her brother what she's learned in school. The only difference between the Peanuts cartoon and Chris's abomination is that Chris swapped out the word "princess" for "sexy, beautiful woman." The reasoning behind this change should be very, very obvious.

{{Infobox/Flipnote
| name = RandomHumor1Part1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8431w3DPSQU}}
| stardate = June 25, 2010
| previous = [[HippoOnYourHead]]
| next = [[RandomHumor1#Part Two|RandomHumor1Part2]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Pleaseno.png|thumb|right|Please no.]]

'''Sister:''' ''[In a horrible, high-pitched voice, imitating Sally Brown]'' Some numbers can't be trusted! These are threes. Did you know that you can never trust threes? See? Threes turn sideways, and pretend that they're M's or N's. And sometimes they turn themselves around to make you think they're E's. Weird, huh? And sometimes they'll even lie on their backs and pretend they're W's. Come back! I'll show you some sixes. They like to pretend they're noses.

I'm practicing my eeks!

'''Brother:''' ''[Imitating Charlie Brown]'' Eeks?

'''Sister:''' Eeks are very important if you're writing about a sexy, beautiful woman in peril, such as a sexy, beautiful woman living in her apartment. She was hanging in her room one day when suddenly a mouse came in. "EEEEK!" she cried. If you want to write a good story about a sexy, beautiful woman in peril, you would have to be able to write a goood eek.

'''Brother:''' An ock probably would've killed me.

'''Writing:''' TO BE CONTINUED IN NEXT Flipnote... -C.W.C.

== Part Two ==
Less than a minute after creating RandomHumor1Part1, Chris uploaded [http://flipnote.hatena.com/5348F770A0A92AE8@DSi/movie/A92AE8_09D8A97E15FBC_002?in=user/ RandomHumor1Part2], a terrifying sequel to the original. Picking up where he left off, Chris continues his spree of stealing from people who are more talented than him by further plagiarizing "Sally at School" and the Amanda Show.

{{Infobox/Flipnote
| name = RandomHumor1Part2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ox8Ui0l6HhE}}
| stardate = June 25, 2010
| previous = [[RandomHumor1#Part One|RandomHumor1Part1]]
| next = [[RandomSong1]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Good_grief.gif‎|thumb|right|Charlie Brown's reaction upon seeing this]]
[[File:Howaboutno.png|thumb|right|How about no.]]

'''Friend:''' Hey dude, where's your sister?

'''Brother:''' Where is right.

'''Sister:''' I'm practicing my Y's.

'''Friend:''' Why?

'''Sister:''' No, Y's. I did a whole row of them.

'''Friend:''' Oh.

'''Sister:''' Not O's, Y's.

'''Friend:''' I see.

'''Sister:''' I C?! Who said anything about I's or C's? These are Y's! Don't you ever listen?

'''Friend:''' Gee.

'''Sister:''' Not G's, Y's. Now pay attention. These are U's.

'''Friend:''' They don't look like me at all! [''Laughs like a [[pedofork]]'']

[''The sister growls and hits her friend'']

'''Friend:''' Ow! Whatcha hit me for?!

'''Sister:''' 'Cause you're an idiot!

'''Friend:''' Okay.

'''Writing:''' HAVE A GOOD AND SAFE DAY. -Christian W. Chandler

[[Category: Flipnote Hatena]]

CWCipedia

2010-05-28T03:05:25Z

Marco:

{{Honest}}
{{protip|Incorporate stuff from CWCipedia into CWCki to get the high score!!}}

[[Image:CWCipedia Introduction.jpg|thumb|right|Chris proudly claims the CWCipedia in the name of [[CWCville]]]]

{{quote|Abandon hope all ye who enter here.|From Dante's Divine Comedy, eerily summing up CWCipedia}}

'''CWCipedia''' (not to be confused with the [[CWCki]]) (now the '''Sonichu Fans Wiki''') was a wiki set up for the sole use of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], as a sort of personal Wiki as opposed to Chris vandalizing the CWCki with his bullshit. Furthermore, it is designed to allow Chris to "get the truth out" as he so desired to do on [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile|his Wikipedia profile]].

Since its inception, Chris has more or less treated the page as free web hosting, a place to put his comics without having to pay for the resulting bandwidth use. CWCipedia also served as the ultimate test of the use of MediaWiki software and software usability, in that it strove to create a platform that even an [[autism|autistic]] manchild/lazy fuck can easily use. Of course, Chris, being a retarded fuckface, still managed to fuck it up from time to time, even with a Sysop holding his hand.

Chris has a tendency to let his mind wander while typing up his entries. For example, in his [[Sonichu]] article he ends up going off on a rant explaining what had happened to [[Kel]] (even though it didn't involve Sonichu at all), and the fact that Chris himself is the leader of the [[CWCville]] Pokémon gym. This leads into Chris describing his supposed gym at length, what Pokémon he has in his team, and his collection of Pokémon in the game (in addition to their level and how he had leveled them). This somehow leads to a fantastically retarded idea for a Pokémon game system that's basically just the holographic projectors from [[Yu-Gi-Oh]], except with Pokémon. After all of that dumbfuckery he gets back to talking about Sonichu again.

==The early days==
Several months after Chris began using the wiki proceeded without incident. He was able to display his comics and music, share more details of his personal life, reveal more background information about the world of CWCville, and shout his bizarre homophobic rantings from the virtual rooftops in peace. The administrators of the site remained a silent, benevolent force behind the scenes.

Towards the end of 2009, this would change.

==CWCipedia advertisements==
[[Image:Untitled.png|thumb|100px|left|Ensuring that Chris sees them EVERY TIME he visits.]]
[[Image:NewCWCipediaFrontpage.jpg|thumb|Chris's revised frontpage]]
As 2009 came to a close, CWCipedia's operators ran into financial trouble keeping the site in the black, given the many hits it gets on a daily basis and the profusion of large files held on its servers. To help keep the site up and running for its TRUE and LOYAL [[fans]], the Sysop that maintains the website for Chris turned to selling advertising space on the site. Keep in mind that these ads were all randomly generated by metadata created by Chris and the people browsing his site, not special hand-crafted ads made by [[trolls]]. Due to the somewhat complicated laws of the jurisdiction in which the servers reside, ads may only be purchased from within the European Union.

Chris makes '''NO''' money from the advertisement revenue. All of it goes to keeping CWCipedia up and running.

Chris responded to these ads with a few complaints to the admin and [[Jack Thaddeus]], who has so far been the only donor who has delivered over €1000, qualifying him to create custom advertisements on the site. [[CWC Blog#7 December 2009|In a blog post]], Chris hoped that ''someone'' within the EU would be able to step up and donate so much money that they'd not only qualify for custom ads, but help to ''remove'' the homoerotic ads that appeared on the site (even though most online advertisers give ''no'' such heavy-handed preferential treatment to premium advertisers, and indeed, no such stated policy exists in CWCipedia either). Even though it may be tempting for some European fans, the appeal of this opportunity seems limited. You can buy a [[PS3]] for you ''and'' your friend with €1000. Or buy three [[Hex Bawx|Hex-Boxes]]. Or four Wiis. Who ''would'' pass up such an opportunity?

On 27 December 2009, the ad space, which was previously at the very bottom of CWCipedia's navbar on the left side of the page, was moved to the very top of the navbar. Another ad appeared on Chris's main page beside the logo. On 28 December, Chris flipped out and replaced it with an ad for the his beloved [[My Coke Rewards]] program. The Sysop, however, [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User_talk:ChrisChanSonichu#Do_NOT_tamper_with_the_advertisements scolded Chris], telling him that ''he'' had no control over the ads.

On 30 December 2009 Chris, unable to change the now-protected main page, lashed out the only way he could, by adding a block of text to the bottom of his (already hideously ugly) front page image, declaring that no ads were allowed on that page. In the message he said that he would not remove this block of text until the offending ads were removed from the main page. To put this in perspective, Chris ''defaced his own website'' in an attempt to get someone else to stop advertising on it. You can guess how well that worked.

On 2 January 2010, Chris began cluttering the website with his ads again, shilling for [[CWC Cola|Coca-Cola]], [[Wild Sonichu|Avatar]] and [[It's UGH!|Proposition 8]]. He took his self-bestowed title of [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|Captain]] to an absolute extreme, posting the following message to CWCipedia:
{{quote| I have another pair of pages for today, and I will answer another [[Mailbag]] or two after uploading. But I also have another announcement; Jack thinks he can get away with occupying my Introduction Box with ANY Ad, well I have a few items I fully support as well. I will be placing my own Ads around the Cwcipedia, as I assert My Rights to do so [[Chris and his Ego|as Captain of this website vessel]].
'''I DO NOT WANT MY ADS REMOVED OR REPLACED BY ANYONE OTHER THAN MYSELF.'''}}

Additionally, Chris posted the following message to his [[Twitter]]:
{{quote|C.C. Sonichu says:...Removal of Any of ALL of MY Ads is consider Mutiny, and [[Chris and Anger|Mutiny will not be tolerated.]] Stay Safe, and have a good day.}}

As to whether or not [[Jack Thaddeus|Jack]] will receive forty lashes less one for his inevitable insubordination, Chris has no comment.

Due to gay porn ads on the CWCipedia, on 01 [[February 2010]] Chris [[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.|unleashed]] a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]] upon Mao "Bamboo" Ling, after which he "[[Apologies to Alec and Evan|apologized]]" to Alec and [[Evan]].

Eventually, on 26 [[February 2010]], Jack Thaddeus returned with an unclickable ad reading "JACK'S BACK" (in text, later converted to a jpeg) and featuring a picture of a man releasing his [[navy]]. Chris, surprisingly, never reacted, even though he has a [[Homos|giant homophobic ass]].

{{collapsible
|CWCipedia advertisement gallery. ''Note: The captions in this gallery are the alt text and links for the ads.''
|<gallery>
Image:CWCipediaAudiobookAd.jpg|[http://www.youtube.com/user/vivitheg#g/c/4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1 Watch the newest audiobooks here!]
Image:CWCipediaAutismAd.jpg|[http://www.aspergerfoundation.org.uk/ Asperger's Syndrome is a serious condition. Get the Facts.]
Image:CWCipediaVlasicAd.jpg|[http://www.vlasic.com/ Taste the Juicy Crunch!]
Image:CWCipediaGayRightsAd.jpg|[http://gayrights.change.org/ Support Family Guys everywhere!]
Image:CWCipediaMexicoAd.jpg|[http://mexico-travel.com/ Discover the facinating world of Mexico]
Image:AxeAd1.png|We all know how [[homos|manly]] [[Axe]] is.
Image:AxeAd2.jpg|In stores now!
Image:Beepboop.png|[http://answers.polldaddy.com/poll/2571589/ PollDaddy Answers Poll]
Image:DateThree.png|[http://www.lotsofloves.com/ Quit playing the waiting game!]
Image:DebtConsolidation.gif|A [[Chris and money| Chris and his money]] are soon parted
Image:DicksSporting.png|[http://www.dickssportinggoods.com/home/index.jsp No Joke]
Image:Diversity.png|But [[niggos|"No Darkies"]]
Image:DuckPreservationSociety.png|[http://www.woodducksociety.com/ You should always take good care of your duck!]
Image:Eyesight.png|Plus, if you go blind, you can't enjoy shirtless men.
Image:Fkinglie.png
Image:GayAutismCure.jpg|Get yours today!
Image:GayAutisticSingles.jpg|The man of your dreams could be living next door!
Image:GayAutisticSon.jpg|I bet Chris [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|Could.]] [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes|Twice]].
Image:GayDrawing1.png|[[Sonichu (comic)|Case in point.]]
Image:GayDrawing2.png|You know what sounds like [[Autism|artistic]]?
Image:GayForGod.png|[[Rocky Shoemaker|Rocky]] Approves.
Image:GayOtakuSexClub.jpg|Can I bring my [[Anime Wings]]?
Image:GayPokemonDVDs.png|That's digusting! Get a [[Muscle bra]] and cover up!
Image:GLISTENINGHALF-NAKEDBLACKMEN.jpg|This one is my favorite.
Image:Heavenlyreward.png|After you die, you get your [[Semen#Comeuppance|Comeuppance]].
Image:HEXBAWKSad.png|A [[Hex Bawx|"Life upgrade"]].
Image:HGwait4u1.png|He's already a [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|fan]]
Image:HGwait4u2.png|AUTISM HOOOOOOU~
Image:Hitlerpedia.png|[http://www.archives.gov/exhibits/charters/bill_of_rights.html Bill of Rights]
Image:HOTTHROBBINGGAYCOCKjpg.jpg|Cumming to butts near you.
Image:JoinTheNavy.gif|[http://www.pinknews.co.uk/news/articles/2005-425.html/ DON'T ASK DON'T TELL]
Image:JustGuys.png|There's nothing wrong with [[High_school#Social_life|only hanging out with one gender]]
Image:Knight.png
Image:PlayNow.png
Image:Kool-Aid.png|It's recommended by 9 out of 10 High Functioning Autistics
Image:LearnAboutIslam.png|Chris has lots of [[mailbag|fans in the middle east]]
Image:Lipitor.png|Better [[Chris and health|stop taking it]] before it makes you [[homos|gay]]
Image:Mystery pic.png|Can you identify our mystery penis?
Image:Naivewater.png|[[Naïve|It's not what you think it is]]
Image:OK2BGay.png|[http://okaytobegay.blogspot.com/ There's a big difference between bending down and kneeling over]
Image:OxieCleanAd.gif|GETS OUT AUTISM, FAST! HERE'S HOW TO ORDER!
Image:PickelParty.png|Sounds promising
Image:PicklePops.png|Pop a Pickle in your mouth today!
Image:PKMN4HP.gif|That HP kid is a total [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spastic spaz]
Image:Sexvote.png|[http://answers.polldaddy.com/poll/2571589/ PollDaddy Answers Poll]
Image:Specialsomeone.png|They don't meet the [[Attraction Sign|requirements]]
Image:This2this.png|Go from [[Obesity|THIS]] to [[Clyde Cash|THIS]]!
Image:VirginiaLaw.png|[[Jerkop|I am the LAW]]
Image:CWCipediaChrisLesGayAd.png|[http://www.eflgc.org.uk/ What do you mean, 'gay and Christian'? It's not possible... or is it?]
Image:Asperchuissue5ad.jpg|It seriously is.

</gallery>}}

==The Twitter feed==
{{main|Twitter}}

On 25 December 2009, the WikiSysop added a live Twitter feed to the [[Mailbag|mailbag]]. This was short-lived, as on the early morning of the 27th Chris removed it in a fit of rage and added the following note:

{{quote|o I will have NO DISCUSSIONS GOING ON BEHIND MY BACK ON MY OWN WEBSITE WHATSOEVER!

I DO NOT SUPPORT YOU GOD DAMN GAYS!!! I F***ING HATE ALL OF YOU WHO ARE THE MAJORITY OF TROLLS WHO MESS WITH ME AND MY LIFE!

GO GET YOUR OWN LIFE AND LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

NO TWITTER ALLOWED!!!|

--ChrisChanSonichu 04:31, 27 December 2009 (CET) }}

Exactly five minutes later Chris would create a special page for the [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Twitter Twitter] feed, and delete the homophobic outburst quoted above. Chris would create a Twitter account for himself [[Chris and hypocrisy|the very next day]], regaling his fans with stories of him doing yardwork. The wise and magnanimous Wiki Administrator later put to the feed to the front page of CWCipedia, due to the fact that ''(ahem)'' it probably needed some wider exposure.

== A history of (un)availability ==
===CWCipedia closed due to a<strike>I</strike>DS===
[[Image:CWCipedia-Home-Copyright.jpg|thumb|The CWCipedia as it appeared on 1/1/10]]

During the last weeks of 2009, Chris became more infuriated as the gay ads continued piling up. In desperation, Chris began placing ads of his own that didn't inspire uncomfortable questions about his sexuality. The Sysop became furious at Chris's unauthorized interference and warned him that if he didn't remove the ads, serious consequences could happen.

On 2 January 2010, the CWCipedia was served a cease and desist notice by the Coca-Cola Company for its unauthorized use of their logo on the site. Thus, the Sysop was forced to close the website for a few days until the matter could be resolved. Having learned a little first-hand regarding what [[Chris and copyright|copyright law]] is all about, Chris issued an [[This_was_my_fault|apology]] on YouTube. In the video he claimed that he thought Coke would appreciate the free advertisement, but he is completely unaware that no self-respecting company would ever want their product to be associated with his website of fail.

Within a few days the site was returned to normal.

===CWCipedia closed (again) due to theft===
[[Image:Cwcipedia closed again.jpg|thumb|right|The CWCipedia's source page as of 2/6/10]]
In the early morning of 6 February 2010, the CWCipedia was closed down again, this time thanks to a DMCA request from representatives of [[Evan|Evan George]]. According to the request, Chris's use of the character [[Simonla Rosechu]] on his website and in his comics infringes upon Evan's intellectual property, as Simonla is clearly a derivative of Evan's character [[Fan:Simonchu|Simonchu]]. This was most likely triggered by Chris's announcement, [[5_February_2010|in a video from 5 February]], that he agreed to do away with Simonla and stop featuring her in his comics, but only at an unspecified "later" time.

Three days after the CWCipedia was locked to edits, it was wiped from the internet entirely. In its place appeared a redirect link to Asperpedia; however, due to a bug, it redirected to an online role-playing game, ''Dogs of the Seas''.

===CWCipedia lives on===
On 12 February 2010, the CWCipedia was revived to a certain extent. Although it was still locked to edits and only a "login required" screen was accessible, it was functional enough for Alec Benson Leary to display the first two pages of "[[Asperchu#Sonichu_Revolution|Sonichu Revolution]]." The next day, Chris fulfilled [[Evan]]'s request and the CWCipedia was restored for all people to see. "Sonichu Revolution" continued onward from there, prominently featured at the top of every page of the CWCipedia.

On 24 February 2010, a new set of ads appeared on the CWCipedia, calling Chris out on his [[Christian Love Day (video)|unwarranted self-importance]] on his birthday, with a message from [[Fan: Moon-Pals|Sean]] imploring fans to give gifts to victims in Haiti instead. The next day, CWCipedia vanished for a couple of minutes for unknown reasons. Likely due to Wild and Simonla's [[Sandy Rosechu|bastard child]]. When it returned, for a few days visitors were treated to the sight of a series of animated ads featuring gigantic ejaculating cocks, revenge from Jack Thaddeus in response to Chris's execution of the Asperpedia Four at the end of [[Sonichu 10]].

===CWCipedia closed due to parody===
{{quote|Also, you might want to take a look at your site before you go around advertising it... Some pretty vulgar vandalism you have going on there on a majority of pages.|Some guy on LittleBigWorkshop. Chris never read this and discovered the vandalism the next day.}}

Going into March 2010, Chris appeared to lose all interest in updating the site or presenting any meaningful new content. He neglected updating the Mailbag and stopped uploading new comic pages. His only additions to the site in the first three weeks of March were a series of rants directed at trolls and his fans, where he accused them of breaking up his pursuit of [[the Wallflower]] and complained that the demand for new Sonichu comics was ruining his life.

On 18 March 2010, CWCipedia was taken down and replaced with a redirect to a [[parody]] version of the website run by [[Mao]]. The Sysop had decided to allow Mao to buy a permanent redirect for 100 dollars. Since Chris was the captain, he decided to sail the U.S.S. CWCipedia into an iceberg and let it sink, making Jack pull all his funding and forcing the Sysop to shut the site down for good.

===[[CWCipedia vandalism|CWCipedia opened for everybody]]===
{{Quote|STOP THIS!!! THIS IS MY DOMAIN, and I WILL NOT HAVE YOU FAGGOTS SCREW IT UP!!!|Chris, somewhat upset.}}
[[Image:Niggachris.jpg|thumb|One of the hundreds of images uploaded by trolls during their epic vandalism.]]

A day later, however, the original CWCipedia returned. At the same time, Mao was given sysop, bureaucrat, and oversight powers on the site, suggesting the arrival of a new "captain" on deck. The result was much good vandalism, most notably on the main page itself, by "Kine", "SEANBOTMK2", "ALECBOTMK2", "EVANBOTMK2", and "Metal Asperchu." Soon, account creation was enabled for all and the website was utterly vandalized in a flurry of [[duck|genitalia]].

===CWCipedia closed to outside edits again===
Early on 22 March WikiSysop returned to the site after being [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:ChrisChanSonichu&curid=46&diff=5987&oldid=5928 busy on other projects] and quickly reversed everything back to the pre-Mao state of the site. However much of the pictoral vandalism continues to remain in the history of many of the pages, and several pages were not changed back, either due to WikiSysop skipping them over or not caring.

===Broken dead===

During the early hours of 31 March, the front page of the CWCipedia [[Patti Chandler|decomposed]] into HTML code. This was attributed to the nature of the 110mb server. The [[Honest content|true and honest]] version created by [[Mao]] is still up and running.

===Resurrection===

Whether it was through coincidence or an act of Godbearjesus, the CWCipedia came back on Easter Sunday. It is more likely that some technicians actually worked through the easter weekend just so an autistic manchild can carry on putting up badly drawn comics when he feels like it for his [[Trolls|fans]].

===Traitorous mutiny===

On 24 [[April 2010]], the sysop uploaded the rest of [[Sonichu 11]] and updated the [[Captain's Log]]. However, many quickly learned that these new pages may not have been as true and honest as they first appeared, as it involved [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] filing for divorce, [[Reginald]] whipping [[pickle|it]] out in front of [[Robbie]], Sandy gets hit by a car, Wild commits suicide by blowing his head off, and all three of the [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Sonichu kids]] getting killed by drinking detergent (actually, Cerah survives, but was put out of her misery by being smothered with a pillow). Two days later, Chris discovers the vandalization and replaces all of the images with a disclaimer that work on Sonichu 11 was ongoing. He then called out on the sysop's "traitorous mutiny", but was willing to forgive her. He then ranted about how he'll find peace off the internet, [[Youtube Finale|suggesting he may]] [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|quit the internet]]... [[Lie|again]]. (SPOILER ALERT: He didn't.)

===A new face===

{{quote|DO NOT "[[South Park|SOUTH PARK]]" MY WORK.|Chris, on Daria's changes. What he means by this is currently unknown.}}

On 13 [[May 2010]], a new user called DariaCamacho appeared on the CWCipedia. She then proceeded to edit the main page and its templates as well as making new character bios. Chris, still highly paranoid after [[Jackie e-mails|Jackie]], reverted her edits on 14 May. The next day, displaying HTML skills similar to Chris, she broke the main page, which was again reverted, and added a message to her talk page asking Chris why he didn't appreciate her edits. [[Ego|We all know why.]] Chris then added his own response on 16 May, telling her not to "[[South Park]]" his work.

===CWCipedia gets gang-banged (again)===

On 26 May 2010, CWCipedia has been hacked, again. And once again, it's open to everyone. Several pages, once blanked and/or deleted were restored, and ''[[Sonichu 11]]'' had the not true and not honest comic pages back up.

===CWCipedia abandoned===

Frustrated by this new wave of trolling, Chris, [[100 2188|in a message in a recent video]], declares the CWCipedia abandoned:

{{quote|As of today, May 27, 2010, I, Christian Weston Chandler, relinquish what was the Cwcipedia. I am keeping ownership of what it was before yesterday, as well as my Sonichu, Rosechu, Cwcville and all therein.

I stand by my own past statements, and I ignore and heavily disagree with, detest and abolish all that are stated Against me on the internet.

I never meant to become famous, and I wish to go back to when there was little against me.}}

===CWCipedia destroyed===

Later that day the CWCipedia, the main site for Chrisitan was finally put to rest.

===CWCipedia resurrected (again) [again]===
Then, later in the same day, the CWCipedia is brought back by the generous Mao of the Asperpedia, waiting to be taken back by the Sysop and given back to Chris [again].

==See also==
* [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence]]

==External links==
*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page CWCipedia]
*[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Main_Page CWCipedia (pre-vandalism)]
*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Special:Recentchanges?hidebots=0 Recent Changes] - monitor Chris's (and the bots') latest updates
*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Special:Recentchanges&feed=rss Recent Changes RSS Feed] - receive Chris's latest updates automatically

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Chris's websites]]
[[Category:CWCipedia]]

China

2010-05-24T02:48:32Z

Marco:

[[Image:Pray_for_China.jpg|thumb|left|This is what Chris actually does. Also notice the comment from [[Jesus]] below.]]

[[Image:ShecameforCWC (200803).JPG|thumb|right|Chris putting his fingers in China]]

[[Image:S_Republic_of_China.svg.png|thumb|right|YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG.]]

[[Image:Mao.gif|thumb|right|Mao is not impressed with Chris's shit.]]

{{quote|I love DYKES! DYKES! CHINA!|[[Chris]]}}

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|Br-yK7nbHuk}}</center>

'''China''' is a [[CWC-isms|CWC-ism]] for the vagina. [[Chris]] likes them along with dykes (or at least he might if he ever went near one, which he won't). He invented the euphemism because he feels uncomfortable saying the word "vagina", and finds solace in giving it the name of a [[CWCville|communist dictatorship]] (perhaps because Chris will never be allowed in either).

In his opening post on the [[Sonichu Girls]] forum, he expresses his love for the female genitalia, saying that each one is "truly a masterful work of [[God]]'s art that is simply beautiful in their own way<ref>[[Sonichu_Girls#Introduction|Introduction post, Sonichu Girls]]</ref>." He then justifies his reverence for China by stating that he cares more about the [[women's rights|feelings and opinions of women]] than about their bodies.

Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime. So far, he has not obtained so much as a milligram or even a micron of it.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 6th, 2008]]</ref>

It is worth noting (though almost certainly unknown to Chris) that during the Restoration Period, "china" was a euphemism for a woman's [[Virgin with Rage|virginity]], because both were in danger of being broken. This euphemism turns up in ''The Rape of the Lock''<ref>"Whether the nymph shall break Diana's law, / Or some frail china jar receive a flaw;" (105-106), http://rpo.library.utoronto.ca/poem/1645.html</ref> by Alexander Pope, who was slightly less ugly than Chris (despite being a crippled dwarf with deformed arms), and a much better [[Chris and writing|writer]].

==Vaginatables==
Alternative CWC-ism for vaginas, used in Chris's alternative e-mail "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com" from his [http://www.networksolutions.com/whois-search/sonichuandrosechu.com whois info for sonichuandrosechu.com].

It is well known that vaginatables are a national delicacy in China, especially when placed in brine juice to create [[pickles]].

==Tom-Tom==
[[Image:tomtom.jpg|thumb|right|200px|Chris's duck hungers for one of these. Note the bend in the route.]]
Another alternate CWC-ism for vaginas. Showed up in [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 26, 2009]], in an annotation, though Chris's usage of the term can be found as early as [[March 2008]] when he [[List_of_Christian's_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#March_2008|edited ED]] by replacing [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] with an image entitled "[[:File:TomTomCloseup.jpg|TomTomCloseup.jpg]]" which featured a closeup of Megan's genitalia from ShecameforCWC.

It should be noted that Chris is incapable of coming up with original ideas, and even this bizarre terminology was stolen. "Pound My Tom-Tom" was a short music video that debuted during the credits of the [[Adult Swim]] show "Lucy the Daughter of the Devil"<ref>''Also, "Tom-Tom" means VAGINA; Look it up in Episode 10 of [[Adult Swim]]'s "Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil,"'' description from [[LOOK at the truth!]]</ref>. Humorously, the gag in the episode was that this is a particularly ''bad'' euphemism for vagina, and one of the characters embarrassed themselves by using it in public.
{{clear}}
<center>
{{#ev:youtube|r1DVoH0Njow}}
</center>

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]
*[[Duck]]
*[[Pickles]]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]

100 2178

2010-05-11T02:22:29Z

Marco:

{{Rename}}

'''100 2178.MOV''' is a 8 [[May 2010]] video in which [[Chris]], lonely and lost at the bottom of a depression-well, reflects on the [[FAIL|state]] of his life.

He made this video after coming home alone from an EXTREME ACTION SPORTS show to which he had won four tickets from a radio call-in contest. He could not find anyone else to go with him, even after he called the members of his Church's Young Adult Social Group, so he was forced to scalp the tickets in front of the stadium and then sit alone in the bleachers beside a "lovey-dovey couple" (who probably haven't even got a [[I_Pimp_My_Ride.MOV|pimped out PS3 controller]]) while handsomer, happier, less [[autistic]] men did flips on motorcycles for the roaring crowd. This situation causes Chris to reflect introspectively on his life, or at the very least complain about the latest faults that have occurred since he and [[Jackie e-mails|Jackie]] broke apart.

For some odd reason, Chris blames the Greene County school board (which tried to pull him out of [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]] when he was a child) for heading a conspiracy to keep him in his "autistic shell" — first by supposedly trying to institutionalize him, then going so far as to bribe a realtor many years later to keep his [[14 Branchland Court|family's house]] in Ruckersville from selling so that his family would have to move back to a town where he had fewer friends. They then bribed [[Michael Snyder]] (years later again) to ban him from [[The GAMe PLACe]]. (There is no evidence yet linking them to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] or the [[Jerkops]].) Chris also has to restrain himself from calling Snyder a "greedy Jew", but could only call him that first word. He ends the video by wishing that they, Michael Snyder, and the [[trolls]] would all go to hell for playing [[Kick the Autistic]].

Perhaps coincidentally, the video was uploaded sixteen years to the day since [[Bob]]'s case against Greene County was thrown out of court.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = 100_2178.MOV
| image = {{#ev:youtube|VwCldRr0kDc}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 08 May 2010
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter =
| Performance Style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| Shirt = {{OrangeSleeveless|text}}
| previous = [[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]
| next = Current
}}

==Transcription==

[''Chris sits in the dark in front of his TV, which is turned off. He is visible only in silhouette. A fan hums in the background.'']

This is [[Christian Weston Chandler]], alias ''[[Christopher]]'' Weston Chandler, pre [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|1990-something]]. Anyway, I-I have sent this message to all the peo- ...ple that were of the [[Greene County]] School Board... and such... during the [[1990s]]... because... Threatening to put me in a mental institution. That was pretty much why we had to run away... and move to Chesterfield County, and I had better life over there, I had a lo- I had so many friends over there, in high school. And I was just ''sad'' to leave, when I, after I graduated. 'Cause I had to leave all my friends. I had the good life. But we were forced to move back here.

You people of Greene County, you could not have left us, uh, left me and my family alone. You had to go and pay off the realtors, just so, this h- so that this house here could not have been sold. If it, 'cause if it had been sold, we would have been able to stay in Chesterfield County. [''[[sigh]]''] And I would have been ha- I would have had a lot- a happier life over there, than right now and how I'm feeling. If, right now, because we ha- 'cause we were forced to move back here because of you goddamn... people who were afraid of [[autistic]] individuals.

[''[[sigh]]'']

You individuals would know who you are. I wish my family and I did not have to move back here. I wish we could have stayed in Chesterfield County, 'cause I had the better life there. And we were doing we- we were doing well, but you had to drag us down! You had to make us unable to sell our house here. You had to ''force'' my family to move back here, where I was OK and I have a couple of friends, and I'm better off with... [''Voice cracks, shakes arm to gesture at room.''] '''stuff.'''

That stuff is no good if I don't have, if I don't have many friends to share it with. [''Chokes back tears.'']

And it all just went downhill. I bet, even Greene County had something to do with influencing that goddamn [[Michael Snyder]] to see f- to see any... so recourse... or... anything like that to make him pretend to have a reason to [[kick]] me out, quote-unquote "''scaaaaring'' his customers away!" You goddamn, greedy... ''Snyder''!

[[Image:Yasg.jpg|thumb|left|The Young Adult Social Group offers Chris a solution.]]

I was at the John Paul Jones Arena earlier tonight, at the Extreme Action Sports. I had won four tickets the previous Friday, Friday of the last week, from 95.1. The few [[Trolls|friends]] I have here could not have come- could not come with me, and I could not even find anyone in the congregation to take- to go with me. 'Cause I misplaced directory for one reason. And even with the help of, uh, my pastoral counselor to get in contact with them, they did not call- none of them called me back!

And I had to sell the... tickets I had, and I had to sit there next to a... lovey-dovey couple. [''His voice begins to crack.''] Which, that was OK, you know, I was trying to be... good- I was trying to be good friend, you know... [''scratches back of head''] Sociable. [''sigh''] But still, if that was... If I had stayed in Chesterfield County, and I would- and I had a similar situation for an event there... I would definitely have had my friends I had there. Moving back here, it just dragged me downhill. So I tell you what, Greene County... Because you saw fit to make- to make me and my family have to move back here, just to make me sad, and move more into my Autistic Shell: ''you did it''.

If I had stayed in Chesterfield County, I would have been a whole lot better off. I wish you would, I wish you would have let us sell our house here. We could have stayed there. I wish you had- I wish we did not have to move back to [''sigh''] I wish we did not have to move back here nearly ten years ago.

[[Image:Wild.png|thumb|Sit and spin.]]

Laugh all you want, trolls! Because... I don't ''give'' a damn. You're all just immature, [[naive]], [[Chris and his Ego|condescending]], [[Patti|soulless]] [[sonichu|''monsters.'']] [[Chris and hypocrisy|You don't ''care'' about others, you only care about yourselves. You only care about getting your own laughs and kicks, because you don't h- you don't have your own social life!]] You [[Death threats|threaten]] me from ha- from trying to seek one of my own, by scaring me on the Internet and whatnot.

Including Clyde Cash, you can all go to hell. And all da people that were on the Greene County School Board during the 1990s then that forced us to have to move back here, '''sit and spin...''' Hell.

And Michael Snyder, I hope you go to Hell, too!

And for everybody el-, as for everybody else... Peace.

===Michael Snyder Replies===
{{quotebox|When I go to hell, I will hold the door open for you, if not not too busy giving tours. I can't believe I've spent all these years conspiring to make your life more miserable than your fossilized parents could ever dream of. Oh, wait, I wasn't doing that, I've been too busy living my own life. I remember you as a child creeping out all the other pokemon kids, including my own, because even 10 years ago you were an angry, unsportsmanlike punk.
Signed,
That goddam Michael Snyder}}

{{-}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}
{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

I Pimp My Ride.MOV

2010-05-05T12:31:10Z

Marco:

'''I Pimp My Ride.MOV''' is a video uploaded on 5 may 2010.

Having discovered that a bug is placed in his [[PS3]] due to the Article of the Now here bragging about it earlier, Christian proudly shows off what he thinks is the now removed device in an never before seen ill fitting Pokemon shirt. Chris brags about his feat, before proceeding to take out his PS3 Keyboard controller(that has wheels taped on to it) and a Lego car, proclaiming he has "Pimped His Ride". Chris actually removed the [http://www.eeshops.com/ps3-wifi-antenna-tyco-19039281-w400-p-528.html Wi-Fi antenna], being the [[Lie | intelligent young man]] he is.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = I Pimp My Ride.MOV
| image = {{#ev:youtube|rz5xYLpUJxY}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 05 May 2010
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = {{Video games|text}}
| Performance Style = {{Crazy}} Crazy
| Shirt = [[Pokémon T-Shirt]]
| previous = [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===
Hey yo trolls! You got nothing going on fer ya, because you know what?

[''Chris proudly lifts the Wi-Fi antenna, thinking it is the bug.'']

I removed it. The Wi-Fi antenna! It gone! You ain’t getting on ma PS3 anymo! You a bunch of dumbasses! And yeah I p-did spend a bit of dough on my grill, but you know what? I'm no b-different from y’all! 'Cuz I like to Pimp Mah Riiiiiiiiidddde!

[''Chris lifts his hands, showing a PS3 keyboard controller with taped on wheels in one, and a lego car in the other.'']

I'm out, peace!

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]|nextlink=Current}}

{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

User:Marco

2010-04-26T04:24:57Z

Marco:

{{quote|A CWCDefense is a [[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]]!}}

==Also Known As==

Marco in [[Asperpedia]].

Formerly known as CWCAttack.

==In His Own Words==

I think [[User:Evang|Evan]] is a pretty cool guy. Eh supports [[homos]] and doesn't afraid of anything.

==Ten Reasons Why Sonichu Sucks==

1) Because Sonichu Comics are UN-Original.

2) Chris admits he got HIS ideas from SEGA AND NINTENDO'S Characters and Comics and Video Games (and a lot, lot more other sources).

3) Sonichu has been around for ALMOST Ten Years Now; Asperchu has been around only a few months and gaining more praise than Sonichu's ever had.

4) Chris doesn't draw gore, and he rarely draws nudity or references, but he writes them in in great detail so you are still very likely to feel queasy in comparison.

5) It is a Straight-Oriented Comic Series.

6) All of the events around CHRIS were based and twisted from His Real-Life Expierences.

7) He claims to have suffered more than Alec has as an individual in life.

8) He uses excuses about working a lot harder in life to cope with those trials and rightful punishments.

9) The comic pages are ALL Poorly Hand-Drawn; the text gets fixed in Comic Sans for better reading, but the structure of the comic itself doesn't help it much.

10) He's had way over a million trolls worldwide since he went online in before 2000.

==Medals==
{{Americunt}}
{{Asexual}}
{{White}}
{{Observer}}

==Notable Contributions==
* [[Down with asperchu|Down With Asperchu!!!]] (Minus the Transcript)

* Taking off a random news article in [[January 2010]].

* Retexting epic tard scream in [[12 January 2010#Part 2|12 January 2010]].

* The [[Death threats#Alec Benson Leary section|Alec Benson Leary]] in [[Death threats]] with the cooperation of [[User:Blazer|Blazer]] (See, I ain't a [[Chris and his ego|narcissist]]).

* The [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:TheREALTailofRosechu.jpg REAL Tail of Rosechu] file for the [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|Transgenderism]] article in [[Rosechu]] with the cooperation of [[User:Phlegethon|Phlegethon]].

==To Do List==

* Add "Health" and/or "Ego" topics in [[Chris and hypocrisy]].

User:Marco

2010-04-26T03:17:25Z

Marco:

{{quote|A CWCDefense is a [[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]]!}}

==Also Known As==

Marco in [[Asperpedia]].

Formerly known as CWCAttack.

==In His Own Words==

I think [[User:Evang|Evan]] is a pretty cool guy. Eh supports [[homos]] and doesn't afraid of anything.

==Ten Reasons Why Sonichu Sucks==

1) Because Sonichu Comics are UN-Original.

2) Chris admits he got HIS ideas from SEGA AND NINTENDO'S Characters and Comics and Video Games (and a lot, lot more other sources).

3) Sonichu has been around for ALMOST Ten Years Now; Asperchu has been around only a few months and gaining more praise than Sonichu's ever had.

4) Chris doesn't draw gore, and he rarely draws nudity or references, but he writes them in in great detail so you are still very likely to feel queasy in comparison.

5) It is a Straight-Oriented Comic Series.

6) All of the events around CHRIS were based and twisted from His Real-Life Expierences.

7) He claims to have suffered more than Alec has as an individual in life.

8) He uses excuses about working a lot harder in life to cope with those trials and rightful punishments.

9) The comic pages are ALL Poorly Hand-Drawn; the text gets fixed in Comic Sans for better reading, but the structure of the comic itself doesn't help it much.

10) He's had way over a million trolls worldwide since he went online in before 2000.

==Medals==
{{Americunt}}
{{Asexual}}
{{White}}

==Notable Contributions==
* [[Down with asperchu|Down With Asperchu!!!]] (Minus the Transcript)

* Taking off a random news article in [[January 2010]].

* Retexting epic tard scream in [[12 January 2010#Part 2|12 January 2010]].

* The [[Death threats#Alec Benson Leary section|Alec Benson Leary]] in [[Death threats]] with the cooperation of [[User:Blazer|Blazer]] (See, I ain't a [[Chris and his ego|narcissist]]).

* The [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:TheREALTailofRosechu.jpg REAL Tail of Rosechu] file for the [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|Transgenderism]] article in [[Rosechu]] with the cooperation of [[User:Phlegethon|Phlegethon]].

==To Do List==

* Add "Health" and/or "Ego" topics in [[Chris and hypocrisy]].

User:Marco

2010-04-26T00:00:44Z

Marco:

{{quote|A CWCDefense is a [[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]]!}}

==Also Known As==

Marco in [[Asperpedia]].

Formerly known as CWCAttack.

==In His Own Words==

I think [[User:Evang|Evan]] is a pretty cool guy. Eh supports [[homos]] and doesn't afraid of anything.

==Ten Reasons Why Sonichu Sucks==

1) Because Sonichu Comics are UN-Original.

2) Chris admits he got HIS ideas from SEGA AND NINTENDO'S Characters and Comics and Video Games (and a lot, lot more other sources).

3) Sonichu has been around for ALMOST Ten Years Now; Asperchu has been around only a few months and gaining more praise than Sonichu's ever had.

4) Chris doesn't draw gore, and he rarely draws nudity or references, but he writes them in in great detail so you are still very likely to feel queasy in comparison.

5) It is a Straight-Oriented Comic Series.

6) All of the events around CHRIS were based and twisted from His Real-Life Expierences.

7) He claims to have suffered more than Alec has as an individual in life.

8) He uses excuses about working a lot harder in life to cope with those trials and rightful punishments.

9) The comic pages are ALL Poorly Hand-Drawn; the text gets fixed in Comic Sans for better reading, but the structure of the comic itself doesn't help it much.

10) He's had way over a million trolls worldwide since he went online in before 2000.

==Medals==
{{Americunt}}
{{Asexual}}

==Notable Contributions==
* [[Down with asperchu|Down With Asperchu!!!]] (Minus the Transcript)

* Taking off a random news article in [[January 2010]].

* Retexting epic tard scream in [[12 January 2010#Part 2|12 January 2010]].

* The [[Death threats#Alec Benson Leary section|Alec Benson Leary]] in [[Death threats]] with the cooperation of [[User:Blazer|Blazer]] (See, I ain't a [[Chris and his ego|narcissist]]).

* The [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:TheREALTailofRosechu.jpg REAL Tail of Rosechu] file for the [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|Transgenderism]] article in [[Rosechu]] with the cooperation of [[User:Phlegethon|Phlegethon]].

==To Do List==

* Add "Health" and/or "Ego" topics in [[Chris and hypocrisy]].

Talk:04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless

2010-04-24T22:22:28Z

Marco:

I'm unfamiliar with the template and general style for describing videos, but just a heads up that I'm trying my hand at transcribing this monstrosity now since I have too much free time these days. Here goes nothing. [[User:Hurrrr2|Hurrrr2]] 05:24, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
* I'll give it a shot too. You do the first half, I do the second half? [[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 05:31, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
* Sure, give me a timestamp to stop working at. [[User:Hurrrr2|Hurrrr2]] 05:39, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
** I just did 7:35 to the ending, I'll start work at 6:00-7:35 now. [[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 05:47, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
* Why transcribe when you can just cut and paste from Wikipedia? --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 05:43, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
* Because MY AUTISM makes me insist on capturing all of Chris's little inaccuracies and deviations from his script. Transcript up, can somebody please put some links into his speech? There's much to work with here since Chris's life, as we all know, is pretty much a checklist for everything wrong that a person with autism can do in any given situation, social or otherwise.[[User:Hurrrr2|Hurrrr2]] 06:32, 23 April 2010 (UTC)

I have this one downloaded, just incase. [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 05:26, 23 April 2010 (UTC)

{{Not A Forum}}

YAAAAH! I hate the fact that YouTube picks a certain spot for a video. Nothing more ''thrilling'' than clicking a link and seeing Chris in his BRA!--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:31, 23 April 2010 (UTC)

==New Shirt Icon==
Okay, my freak out into a "Not a Forum" template appearance notwithstanding, you think we should add in his sports bra as an icon? I mean, seriously, he's worn it in, what, two, three videos now? If the "Mount And Do Her" shirt got one, I think the bra should too. I'd make the icon, but I suck at graphics.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 06:30, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
*Definitely. I should really start working on the shirts again. But, y'know, inspiration is a big variable.[[User:Kynes|Kynes]] 16:45, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
:*Done and done.--[[User:Jewlay|Jewlay]] 18:11, 23 April 2010 (UTC)

==The end of Chris's Monitoring?==

{{Not A Forum}}

A month ago, Chris posted the rant regarding the Cleveland show voice talent. This was the last video he left on his YouTube account on a permanent basis. This let me believe that the monitoring Chris's handlers were exerting might have expired. On the other side, the whole thing is just a huge, retarded PSA and might fit in the Censors's demands. Will we see the return of Chris wacky videos on YouTube? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 12:42, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
*It's meeting their demands, he didn't talk about trolls. Still made himself look retarded.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 13:38, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
:*Who's demands? Also, I find it very hard to believe that people who genuinely Have Chris's best interests in mind would let him cross-dress on youtube. It's times like this when I wish the mailbag was still active. Then we could just up and ask him if he's ever been to the beach or a pool or other places guys go shirtless.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 14:06, 23 April 2010 (UTC)

== Article Name ==
We should really move this article to [[Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]] and just state the actual title in the first line of the article text. I like how we standardise article names for videos which have stupid names, seeing as how Chris doesn't bother to rename them properly himself. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 16:50, 23 April 2010 (UTC)

== Receding Hairline ==
{{Not A Forum}}
Is it me, or is this quite possibly the most concrete proof to date that Chris is indeed balding? His forehead is gigantic in this vid --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 18:18, 23 April 2010 (EST)
*I think he's just got his head slightly tilted back. I'm not sure either. Also, just because it has to be said: Chris really has no fucking shame.[[User:WarOfTheBees|WarOfTheBees]] 00:34, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

== Sarcasm ==
Anyone got any good examples of Chris not understanding sarcasm? I'd like to incorporate it with the part Chris said that autistics can't understand sarcasm. --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 22:22, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

File talk:Sonichupunch.jpg

2010-04-24T21:18:00Z

Marco:

Who is that guy behind Chris and what is he doing?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 18:07, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
* He looks like he's giving Chris [[Bunny Hop|bunny ears]]. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 22:57, 14 April 2010 (UTC)
And what the fuck is ''Chris'' doing? That really supposed to be a punch? It looks more like he's trying to get out his cards or some shit. --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 21:18, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

User talk:Marco

2010-04-24T21:08:04Z

Marco:

Well, since Chris is more or less out of the picture, I'm gonna go for a new enemy to face: Michele Bachmann.

She's like Chris, a hypocritical, egotistical, homophobic, "religious" liar. Yet unlike Chris, '''she actually has a fanbase and a rather large one'''. She's spreading lies about the Obama administration trying to turn the US into Nazi Germany by claiming they're trying to take over the entire economy and censor anyone opposing them.

Anyone care to join? --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 00:03, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:Not your personal army.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 00:11, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:*I'm not calling for an army. I'm just calling for whoever's bored with Chris and wants to troll someone else or such. --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 00:13, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:I am not in your personal army. Please don't ask again. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 01:12, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:*Okay, I'll behave here. --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 02:40, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

Hey, Thanks for the advise, I followed it through. actually, i just discovered the diff between user page and user talk page, hurr durr derp. and thanks for the welcome message *sniff sniff*, it was someting nobody had done for me before.--[[User:Rosechupenis|Rosechupenis]] 20:35, 24 April 2010 (UTC)
:* Just doing my patriotic duty, but you're still welcome. --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 21:08, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

List of Chris's lies

2010-04-24T05:37:32Z

Marco:

{{quote|I do not lie all the time; I lie some of the time.|[[Chris]], '''lying''' in [[Kacey and Liquid Call]]}}

[[Chris]], not being one to accept personal responsibility, will frequently '''lie''' to save face.

In many cases, he will lie in a meager attempt to be "clever" or "outwit" the [[trolls]]. However, Chris is totally incapable of lying in a way that looks remotely convincing, so his lies have the opposite effect (e.g. going to Redmond). In other cases, he will lie to deny accepting personal responsibility for his actions (e.g. drawing a [[ShecameforCWC.jpg|rule 34]] of [[Megan]]).

The reason why Chris is capable of telling bold-faced lies while still claiming to be [[Honest content|True and Honest]] probably derives from failing to understand the concept of a "white lie," a lie said out of courtesy to avoid offending people with the uncomfortable truth. Because telling this kind of lie usually is socially acceptable and won't tarnish one's reputation, Chris, in his usual blindness to social rules, probably learned through his [[autistic]] brain that it is OK to lie in order to save face, because it is possible to do so while still remaining Honest.

This list serves to document all of Chris's blatant falsehoods. While Chris is known to speak half-truth, exaggerate, etc., the fact that he is willing to outright tell blatant lies and untruths with no grounds in reality is disturbing and this list serves to document the latter.

==Chris's lies==

*Chris claims to be related to [[Anne Boleyn]], which is impossible since her ultimate descendant is the '''virgin''' Queen Elizabeth.

*In a Mumble chat, he lied and said that nude photos of him on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] were photoshopped, despite the fact that he consented to these photos.<ref>[[Mumble 2|Mumble Chat 2]], ~44 minute mark</ref> Chris also lied to [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] about the ED images being photoshopped.<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#From Chris to Miyamoto]]</ref>

*For two days, Chris claimed to have a new [[sweetheart]] named [[Chloe]] after the [[Blanca]] breakup. The first mention was to his fans, of all people.<ref>[[Chris's Sonichu IRC Chloe Introduction]]</ref> Yet if he were already seeing Chloe, why was he sad about breaking up with Blanca? Chris claimed to have met Chloe IRL at [[GameStop]] where they struck up a conversation, yet Chris has constantly said he freezes even while practicing talking to women.<ref>[[Vivitheg's AIM chat]]</ref> The most damning evidence is Chris never mentioned Chloe again. Furthermore, as of [[Mailbag 13]], he denies that he ever said anything about a Chloe.

*In the infamous [[IRC (21 January 2009)|Clyde-raped-Panda chat]], Chris states, "My heart is true and set, and I have made my promises. I am with [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] in mind and soul; I have promised to be her True Sweetheart...and I am not a man who goes back on his promises." Chris then proceeded to give her up to [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]] over a matter of days, and then quickly became involved with [[Julie]].

*Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|lied]] about taking a trip to Redmond because he had no financial support and to get a "Peaceful Weekend Getaway from the Trolls of the internet."<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#From Chris to Miyamoto]]</ref>

*In his [[Chris dispels videogame rumors|13 September 2009]] video, he says he personally talked to Sega of America and was told Project Needlemouse (or as he calls it, Needlenose) was a new Sonic game, and not a Sonichu game. Ignoring Chris's track record for honest interaction with video game representatives, the truth of the game was not revealed until 4 February 2010 where it was revealed to be ''Sonic the Hedgehog 4''. The idea that Sega would tell a greasy virgin manchild who rips off their intellectual property what the game is and not anyone else is 100% bullshit.

*Chris claimed that the [[DVD]] that trolls procured wasn't the "director's cut,"<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008]]</ref><ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009]]</ref> yet the DVD had all the features that had been described before trolls even came into contact with Chris. More so, when the alleged "director's cut" was shown on video, the DVD itself clearly had "Director's Cut" scribbled in with a Sharpie, suggesting that Chris altered it in an attempt to back up his lie.

*Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|claimed]] that [[Blanca]] received the [[medallion]] and sent it back so Chris could modify it, yet the Medallion with the "special marks" was destroyed on YouTube. Furthermore, in a private chat with [[Robert Simmons V]]{{cite}}, Chris admits that the medallion was procured and was hastily working on a new one to throw the trolls off guard.

*When a nefarious IRL [[Jerkop]] confronted Chris on his [[Attraction Sign]], Chris quickly hid the sign while the Jerkop left to get the [[Manajerk]]. Then, Chris proceed to lie and pretend he never brought the sign, resulting in him being banned from the store.

*While Chris has certainly called the police on the occasional troll or two, Chris will [[CCWC's_Final_Warning_to_the_Second_CWC|warn trolls]] that he has unleashed the full fury of the FBI and/or [[CWC_-_Exposing_Jeff|police detectives]] on them. When he wants to be really intimidating, he'll say they are [[10142009|"his detectives"]] as if he is in direct command of them. However, people smarter than Chris (that is to say, all people) know that Chris is totally bluffing, as neither the FBI nor even small-town police detectives are going to waste their time and resources trying to track down someone who said mean things about Chris over the intertubes when there are no end of serious felonies in need of investigating.

*Chris claimed that he was banned from [[The Game Place]] forever for going behind the counter. In fact, as revealed by [[Mimms]] on the PVCC forum, the ban for going behind the counter was temporary, and what got him banned forever was the fact that he got into a shouting match with a child and treated the [[Michael Snyder|store's manager]] rudely.

*In an email,<ref>[[Chris E-mails 2008]] -- 'Against me, [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|that page]] has broken the closest thing I've had to a relationship with Megan Schroeder, who I've finally had at her first time of saying with feeling, "I Love You" to me, then she found that page and she broke up with me.'</ref> Chris claimed Megan said she loved him, when in reality she said no such thing.

*After Chris pissed off Megan by posting [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] he proceeded to apologize to her [[Megan E-mails|via e-mail]], claiming he was [[Megan E-mails#Chris apologizes for something, what could it be?|"sorry for hurting [her]"]] and that he was [[Megan E-mails#Chris does not regret the Meganporn|"sorry for uploading the drawing"]], saying to her [[Megan E-mails#Chris does not regret the Meganporn|"I've learned from my mistakes"]]. He later proved he felt no remorse for the drawing by [[ShecameforCWC.JPG#Today|reuploading the picture]] for use in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], citing the need for "sexy pictures for a sexy website."

*Chris claims that he is the descendant of [[Daniel Weston]], one of the pilgrims on board the Mayflower. This is obviously not true, because according to all known passenger lists, there was no man named Daniel Weston on the ship.<ref>[http://www.pilgrimhall.org/mayfpass.htm A list of all passengers on the Mayflower from a guy who was actually there]</ref>

*He has made occasional claims<ref>See [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009]] and [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 29th, 2009]]</ref> that he really doesn't hate [[homos]], despite several instances of him showing otherwise.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009]], [[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]], [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], [[It's UGH!]], [[CWC "Boyfriend"]], [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls]]</ref>

*In an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]]<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]] at 21:21</ref> with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]], Chris told Clyde, "People who call others homo are themselves in dire question of their own sexual preferences." When Clyde pointed out that Chris had called Clyde a homo just minutes earlier in the same chat, Chris lied that he didn't. When Chris was shown the exact words he typed, he said it didn't count because he was retaliating against Clyde's remark.

*Impersonated [[CChanSonichuCWC]] and called [[Kacey]], telling her about his sexual fantasies (which involves [[recycling]]).<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>

*Chris's challenges to CChanSonichuCWC began with a [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 29th, 2009|video]] in Spanish, stating that if Liquid Chris could not respond in Spanish, that would prove he is the impostor. When that [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYAAc9zAVQw backfired horribly], Chris then issued the [[SingStar Challenge]] to determine who is the real Chris. When Chris lost the SingStar Challenge, he declared that the contest meant nothing.

*He claimed to have an [[Robotnik|IQ of over 300]].<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]] at 12:23</ref> For perspective, the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_vos_Savant woman with the highest IQ in the world] has an IQ of 230. Later on, he claimed to have an IQ of 150.<ref>[[Mailbag 19]]</ref>

*Chris has inserted clearly bullshit [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_1/Page_1 disclaimer pages] at the front of each issue of his comics where he claims:
{{quote|Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu Comics]], except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise [[Parody|parodic]].|Chris's disclaimer as it appears in his comics.}}

*Chris made a fake page<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20071108233910/http://members.aol.com/CWCSonichu/EPPromotions283.html</ref> mimicking [[PS3|playstation]].com that showed him as the winner of the [[PaRappa contest]].

*Trying to sound like a tough guy, Chris claimed in a [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|15 October 2009]] Captain's Log entry that he "did not give a dang" about the reappearance of [[Liquid Chris]], which is obviously not true since Solid devoted the entire first half of the Captain's Log to discrediting Liquid. Solid also stated that it would be the last time he mentioned Liquid, so of course he mentioned him again in [[Brutal Legend Plus|a video six days later]]. In that video, Solid even used one of [[SingStar_Challenge_Round_1#CChanSonichuCWC.27s_Entry|Liquid's SingStar Challenge songs]] to mock the [[trolls]] (the song's original purpose being to mock Solid), proving that Liquid does indeed still agitate him.

*In [[Mailbag 14]], Chris offered a revisionist account of his ejection from [[Grace Baptist Church]], claiming that he was banned from the congregation because his pastor "found images of women in bikinis on my Facebook; he was offended." In fact, as Chris himself revealed in an e-mail to [[Lordsillynipples]] in 2008, he was kicked out after his pastor discovered the catalog of Chris's sexually deviant behavior on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], as well as the deranged YouTube rant from his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|25th birthday]].

*In [[Mailbag 25]] Chris revealed that he told [[Bob Chandler|his father]] that he had taken the videos of the [[14 Branchland Ct.|Chandler house]] off the internet. The videos are still available on YouTube.

*Chris claims he can lift [[Mailbag 48#Chris recommends wearing girl clothes over guy clothes|"well over 100 pounds"]].

*In order to substantiate his claim that [[Asperchu]] is a [[parody]] of himself, Chris would logically be forced to admit their many similarities. However, most of that would involve admitting that Chris is a delusional, self-centered prick. Chris instead opts to note the similarities in their physical appearance. To wit: Asperchu's [[Pedo-Glasses]], [[Rollin' and Trollin'|goatee]], and [[Chris and Fashion|striped shirts]]. However, when it comes to Asperchu's rotund figure and obvious man-boobs, Chris admits that he ''used to'' have "manboobs" and a "buddha belly". Obviously, those things should not be described in the [[obesity|past tense]].

*Chris began receiving emails in [[January 2010]] pointing out to him that his drawings of the Raichu from which Rosechu spawned in [[Sonichu 0]] had a pointed tail instead of a blunted one, meaning the Raichu was male. As Chris is a 300-IQ-having detail-oriented Pokémon expert, and he drew this Raichu with a pointed tail several times, fans concluded that he must have intended this, and let Chris know they now understand Rosechu started out male, and may still be a trap or hermaphroditic. Panicked that he'd been cornered, but unable to just issue a simple [[retcon]] due to his [[Chris and his ego|crippling ego]], Chris instead made a 22 January post on his [[CWCipedia]] including a doctored picture of the Raichu with the tail now blunted and lied to his readers that it had always been drawn that way since the very beginning. Not only was it obviously photoshopped, but he's such a tremendous idiot that he didn't change the actual comic page showing the pointed tail in his own site's archives. (It should be noted that Chris devised Rosechu's back story before Pokémon introduced the concept of gender specific features; all Raichu were depicted with a pointed tail before 2006. While Chris could have simply made this point, he opted to instead lie to his TRUE and HONEST fans.)

*In early [[February 2010]], Chris added a note to the [[CWCipedia]] page for [[Simonla Rosechu]] claiming that she is a completely original character, and not a sloppy knockoff of [[Evan]] George's character [[Fan:Simonchu|Simonchu]]. This was, of course, an obvious lie, contradicted by Chris's own e-mails and other statements about Simonla's creation. Later, in a [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 4|phone conversation]] with Alec Benson Leary, Chris acted surprised that anyone would be unwilling to accept this "retraction" of the truth, suggesting that he doesn't even comprehend why people might not believe his lies.

*When [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 6|talking to Alec]], Chris claimed that the [[Basement Rosechus]] were not meant to imply that Alec raped them, only that he allegedly treated them like hamsters. If this were so, why is one of them wearing a bridal gown, and why is one clad in only her undergarments if he was just keeping them as non-sexual pets?

*On Chris's [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 5|fifth phone call with Alec]], Chris very quickly found his own logic being used against him. To extricate himself from having to admit he was wrong, Chris instead set the phone down and very unconvincingly pretended to be his own [[Barbara Chandler|mother]], carrying on a small "conversation" with Chris asking him to clean up some [[Chandler cats|cat shit]]. Chris then came back to the phone to tell Alec his mom needed him to take care of the cat and that he had to hang up.

*During the [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|the eighth conversation with Alec]], Chris claims Nintendo sent him a letter saying Chris had free reign to use Pikachu in his comic, but when Alec asked Chris to upload the letter, Chris said he "misplaced" it. Nintendo simply giving away rights to use one of the most popular characters from one of their biggest cash cows is absolutely ridiculous. Also during the call, Chris made it a point to state very confidently that he "regularly" plays every single one of the games he owns as a valid reason to not sell off any of his games to make some money. Chris owns [[List of Chris's games|roughly 600]] different video games, so unless Chris has figured out [[Time Void|a way to stop time]], it would be impossible for him to play all of those games regularly. Even if he played games for 10 hours a day, 30 minutes at a time for each game, he'd only be able to play each game once a month.

*Chris went to great lengths to tell the fans that he would never show gore and violence in his comics. However, he breaks this statement by killing Evan in a very gory fashion in [[Sonichu 10]].

*When the trolls started to demand more comics, Chris stated that he was never sure about making money with Sonichu, if that were true, he would never try to make a [[Sonichu Adventure|videogame]] about Sonichu, nor try to sell it to businesspeople.

*Chris has repeatedly referred to [[The Wallflower]] as his "girlfriend", despite making a video [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|pleading for her to be with him]], and in fact complaining about her essentially putting him in the [[friend zone]].

*Promised to [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|"remove [him]self from the internet"]], only to [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|return in less than 48 hours]].

*While trying to get himself back into the GAMe PLACe, he says to Michael Snyder he's a better person. This is after all the shit he's done in the last year and a half, while secretly recording Michael, and ends the meeting calling Michael a Jew like it's an insult despite previously claiming he had nothing against Jews.

*Chris's [[Damien_Antaria_(CWCipedia_page)|CWCipedia article about the Wallflower]] contains some of the biggest flights of fantasy, blatant lies, exaggerations, half-truths and flat out delusions seen yet from Chris outside of the [[Father Call]]. Specifically, he claimed that he and the Wallflower had shared a kiss; since this would have been Chris' "real" first kiss (aside from "[[Chloe]]", a lie), it was considered important by obsessive CWCik editors to see if he remembers it later (the Wallflower CWCipedia page article was written on April the 19th). Naturally... [[Jackie e-mails_Part_2|leaked e-mails from Jackie]] show that by the 10th of April, ''nine days before making this highly suspicious claim'', [[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2#Jackie.27s_Questionaire_1|Chris had either momentarily forgotten that he had been kissed]], something that would have been a monumental occasion in his life, lied on his CWCipedia about being kissed, or lied to Jackie about ''not'' being kissed (though that is very unlikely). Either way, he still lied about the kiss.

{{quote|I'm starting to really kinda doubt this whole 'honesty' thing you keep talking about.|Matthew Devoria - [[Father Call]]}}

==Sauces==
<references />

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Lists]]

April 2010

2010-04-23T23:11:11Z

Marco:

[[File:ChrisSportsBra.jpg|thumb|Chris in April 2010 (and in [[muscle bra]])]]

Throughout '''April 2010''', Chris's online activity has been pretty sporadic, both due to him trying to stay off and free himself from the influence of the Internet (probably prompted by [[Rocky Shoemaker|an outside force]]), and because a new potential [[sweetheart]], named "Jackie", had started to exchange emails with him.

The month started with the [[CWCipedia]] looking like the owner's [[duck]]. That is, to say, mangled beyond recognition. The website was stripped of its flesh and colors, pictures and formatting, leaving behind only a skeleton of HTML code, [[Patti|like the remains of an animal that's been dug up after many years in the ground]]. This was probably due to 110mb being shit as usual.

Chris has also acted on his [[Death threats|threat]] of "trouble from himself personally" after the expiration of his ultimatum. However, being the fatass dumbfuck that he is, all his vandalism was noticed and quickly reverted. However, he wasn't banned by order of the great [[Clyde Cash]].

On 5 April, however, Chris's second [[The Hook Cafe]] ad was discovered, further cementing the fact that he only wants a sweetheart for the [[hanky-panky]]. Said ad was deleted on 9 April.

A week later, Chris returned to the GAMe PLACe in an attempt to get his permaban removed so he can start bogarting everything. The manager, Michael Snyder, was unmoved and told Chris to get out, prompting Chris to show himself as a [[Chris and race|horrible bigot]] once again by using the word "Jew" as an insult (even though Michael is not Jewish). Chris posted a video of the incident, then posted an image on the CWCipedia asking his fans, [[A Message to the Trolls|the same ones he compared to trolls a month ago]], to [[Chris and hypocrisy|troll]] him and ask why he's playing [[Kick the Autistic]]. Not only did this, as expected, not work, Michael was, quite to the contrary, subsequently hailed as a hero for keeping the anti-semitic man-child down.

After his rejection from the GAMe PLACe however, Chris once again turned to Sonichu, for the first time all month, when he went about writing several biographies for the Chaotic Combo, which he then followed up with a lulzworthy history of all female interaction he has ever had. He ranked his childhood teacher among potentential crushes too, just for extra WTF.

Chris managed to keep quiet about Jackie (probably having learned something from the whole [[Wallflower]] incident), and her existence was not known to the general public of trolls, before she leaked the whole email correspondence and a deliciously creepy video by Chris to the [[CWCki]].

==Events of April 2010==
* 01 April - Chris, as if his [[Death threats#Cogsdev|threat]] were an April Fools joke, [[fail|fails]] to act or [[Chris and anger|tard rage]] against the [[CWCki]].
* 02 April - Chris [[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki|remembers his threat]], and [[Template:DYK|vandalizes]] [[Template:Article of the now|three]] [[Template:Picture of the now|templates]]. His edits are quickly reverted.
* 04 April - 110mb gets its act together and the CWCipedia returns.
* 05 April - Chris's [[The Hook Cafe]] personal ad is discovered, which blatantly broadcasts the fact that he's just after [[hanky-panky]] now.
* 05 April - First of the [[Jackie|Jackie E-Mails]] is sent.
* 09 April - Chris's [[The Hook Cafe]] personal ad is deleted, along with a bunch of troll ads. He is likely attempting to hide the fact that he's picked up Jackie.
* 10 April - Chris updates his blog and Captain's Log, breaks his exile from the internet to claim that pages are being drawn and that the ads will not phase him.
* 11 April - Chris visits [[The GAMe PLACe]] after Church. One of the cashiers reconizes him and threatens to call the police. Chris flees.
* 12 April - Knowing that [[Michael Snyder]] is present, Chris revisits the The GAMe PLACe with his digital camera in his pocket and records his attempt to get himself unbanned. Michael tells him off and starts calling the police, causing Chris to flee again. Later that day, Chris releases [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|the audio recording]] of the event, but it is quickly removed.
* 13 April - Chris posts a [[:File:AskMichaelSnyder.jpg|picture]] on the CWCipedia asking his fans to call Michael Snyder and ask him he wants to play Kick the Autistic.
* 14 April - Chris continues to undo [[CWCipedia]] vandalism, and writes biographies for the members of the [[Chaotic Combo]].
* 16 April - Chris waits for [[Jackie]] at the Starbucks Kiosk at the Mall. She doesn't show up.
* 19 April - Chris creates a new "[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts]]" page, where he drops [[the Wallflower]]'s real name ''again''. Apparently traumatized by his failed CWCki "attack", he also creates a page titled "The Christian Truth", which currently links to the revised ED page and the Gal-Pals page, and promises "Plenty More to Come".
* 19 April - Shortly after publishing the original page, Chris deletes [[Tiffany Robinson]], [[Virginia Sanford]], [[Natasha Turner]], [[Sarah Anne Bevel]], [[Molly Quarles]], and [[Miranda Joyce Mitchell]] from his list of gal-pals. However, the Wallflower section remains unchanged.
* 20 April - Chris makes a [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia Page)|page]] dedicated to [[The Wallflower]]. Chris later blanks the page and changes the Wallflower's name to her pen name on the Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts page. Then, he goes and recreates the page using her penname.
* 21 April - Last of the [[Jackie|Jackie E-Mails]] is sent.
* 21 April - Jackie emerges, leaking a [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|disturbing video]] and [[Jackie e-mails|all]] [[Jackie e-mails Part 2|supporting]] [[Jackie e-mails Part 3|documentation]] directly to the CWCki.
* 23 April - Chris releases a [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|video]] asking for understanding for autistic people whilst wearing nothing but a bra.
{{Timeline}}

Metonic

2010-04-23T23:08:19Z

Marco:

[[Image:Metonic.jpg|thumb|Metonic|Sonichu + Metal Coat + Trade = Metonic]]

{{quote|Metonic evolves from Sonichu by being traded while holding a Metal Coat. His armor adds weight, so he can't do a Spin Dash. But his speed stays the same, and his spikes are diamond sharp.|[[:Image:208-CMetonicBck.jpg|Metonic Animal Crossing card]]}}

'''Metonic''' is some dumb evolution of [[Sonichu]] from the future. Seen in Classic Strips. According to an [[Animal Crossing]] card in the [[scrapbook]], Sonichu evolves into Metonic by being traded while holding a Metal Coat.

Since in the canon future of Sonichu, Sonichu has indeed become Metonic, this implies that Chris will be remarkably successful in using Pokémon trading tricks: not only will he find someone to perform a back-and-forth evolution trade (it was fairly common in old Pokémon games to send the traded Pokémon back again after the evolution trade), but this person will indeed ''not'' be a [[Medallion#Mark 1 (and decoy)|troll who yanks off the cable and runs away]], grinning like a loon, with Chris's Metonic on their cart.

In [[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]], adults are portrayed as Metonics and [[Vamprosa]]s for absolutely no reason.

==Spin Dash==
Apparently he can't do one. [[Yawning Squirtle|Call da police]]. Taking all the armour off (as well as that goddamn archaic sword) would probably help no end with this.

==So, what's the difference between Metonic and a Sonichu wearing armor?==
Metonic has spikey ears.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:207-ACMetonic.jpg
Image:208-CMetonicBck.jpg
Image:209-Metonic1.jpg
Image:210-Metonic2.jpg
Image:211-YuMetonic.jpg
Image:212-MetonicsSword.jpg
Image:213-MetalBoots.jpg
</gallery>
</center>
 
{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Sonichu]]
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]

File talk:ChrisSportsBra.jpg

2010-04-22T22:42:17Z

Marco:

So far, this is the only picture that has brought me very close to vomiting. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 04:46, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

If I had to summarize my initial reaction to seeing this picture in one word... FFFFUUUUUUUUU!!! [[User:NoVu|NoVu]] 16:00, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

I think I'm gonna puke... Also, should this be in the Muscle Bra gallery? --[[User:UJ1A1985|UJ1A1985]] 20:16, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

This picture is just creepy. It almost looks like someone photoshopped Chris's head onto a woman's body. Sadly this is all too real. --[[User:Sack Thaddic|Sack Thaddic]] 20:46, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

Fuck! They're bigger than ever! --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 22:42, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

Netflix

2010-04-22T02:52:43Z

Marco:

{{taxpayermoney}}
A collection of Chris's orders from Netflix, a website where one can rent movies or stream them over the internet via the Instant Watch service. Netflix also offers the Instant Watch service through the Wii, the [[Xbox 360]] and the [[PS3]]. As the list below shows, Chris spends an awful lot of time watching the rubbish he has on his Instant Watch queue. On two occasions, he actually spent '''more than six and a half hours''' a day watching Keeping Up Appearances and South Park.

It's no wonder that Chris never updates anything…

The list contains some surprises; notably, ''Maniac Nurses Find Ecstasy'' pops up. It is likely that Chris rented this expecting porn rather than a cheap Hungarian Troma classic. As for ''The Story of O'' - Chris likely chose this based on its description. Unless he has become a connoisseur of French erotic arthouse cinema from the 1970s.

== Instant Streaming History ==

{| class="wikitable"
!Date
!Title
!Time
|-
|11/13/09
|Monty Python: And Now for Something Completely Different
|01:35:29
|-
|11/13/09
|Carrie
|01:40:04
|-
|11/13/09
|30-Second Bunnies: A Christmas Story
|00:01:45
|-
|11/13/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Casablanca
|00:01:02
|-
|11/13/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Brokeback Mountain
|00:01:02
|-
|11/13/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Caddyshack
|00:02:17
|-
|11/13/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Superman
|00:01:01
|-
|11/13/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Office Space
|00:01:10
|-
|11/13/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Raiders of the Lost Ark
|00:01:02
|-
|11/13/09
|30-Second Bunnies: The Ring
|00:01:05
|-
|11/13/09
|Keeping Up Appearances A Bon Vivant Buffet
|00:29:05
|-
|11/13/09
|Maniac Nurses Find Ecstasy
|00:43:44
|-
|11/13/09
|The Red Skelton Collection Freddy the Freeloader's Christmas Dinner
|00:52:02
|-
|11/14/09
|Tripping The Rift: God Is Our Pilot
|00:23:14
|-
|11/14/09
|Tripping The Rift: Mutilation Ball
|00:22:02
|-
|11/14/09
|Tripping The Rift: Miss Galaxy 5000
|00:22:36
|-
|11/14/09
|Tripping The Rift: Sidewalk Soiler
|00:24:16
|-
|11/14/09
|Tripping The Rift: The Devil and a Guy Named Webster
|00:22:11
|-
|11/14/09
|Tripping The Rift: Totally Recalled
|00:22:24
|-
|11/14/09
|Tripping The Rift: 2001 Space Idiocies
|00:21:46
|-
|11/14/09
|Therese and Isabelle
|02:04:46
|-
|11/14/09
|The Pigkeeper's Daughter
|01:23:41
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Fight Club
|00:02:03
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Christmas Vacation
|00:01:13
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Borat
|00:01:03
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Bond
|00:02:44
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Spider-Man 1 & 2
|00:01:06
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Pirates of the Carribean 1 & 2
|00:01:02
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: March of the Penguins
|00:01:02
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Die Hard
|00:03:05
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Napoleon Dynamite
|00:01:42
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Saw
|00:03:24
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: The Grudge
|00:01:28
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Kill Bill
|00:01:45
|-
|11/14/09
|30-Second Bunnies: Snakes on a Plane
|00:01:55
|-
|11/15/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: The Name Is Bouquet B-U-C-K-E-T
|00:56:32
|-
|11/15/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: Welcoming the Dishy Vicar
|00:29:03
|-
|11/15/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: Visiting an Acquaintance's Stately Home
|00:29:19
|-
|11/18/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: Let There Be Light
|00:32:37
|-
|11/18/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: Sea Fever
|01:23:05
|-
|11/18/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: A Very Merry Hyacinth
|00:30:37
|-
|11/18/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: Riparian Entertainments
|00:29:17
|-
|11/19/09
|South Park: Weight Gain 4000
|00:23:56
|-
|11/19/09
|South Park: Volcano
|00:37:17
|-
|11/19/09
|South Park: An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig
|00:37:38
|-
|11/19/09
|South Park: Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride
|00:15:20
|-
|11/19/09
|South Park: Death
|00:23:22
|-
|11/19/09
|South Park: Starvin' Marvin
|00:23:00
|-
|11/19/09
|South Park: Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
|00:28:23
|-
|11/19/09
|South Park: Mecha Streisand
|00:30:36
|-
|11/21/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: Angel Gabriel Blue
|02:29:18
|-
|11/21/09
|Keeping Up Appearances: How to Manage a Family Christening
|00:30:12
|-
|11/21/09
|South Park: Cartman's Mom Is a Dirty Slut
|00:27:08
|-
|11/21/09
|South Park: Cartman's Mom Is Still a Dirty Slut
|00:29:33
|-
|11/21/09
|South Park: Chickenlover
|00:23:11
|-
|11/21/09
|South Park: Ike's Wee Wee
|00:30:35
|-
|11/21/09
|South Park: Conjoined Fetus Lady
|00:23:01
|-
|11/21/09
|South Park: Mexican Staring Frog
|00:25:09
|-
|11/21/09
|South Park: City on the Edge of Forever
|00:47:11
|}

{| class="wikitable"
!Date
!Total Time
|-
|11/13/2009
|5:30:48
|-
|11/14/2009
|6:30:28
|-
|11/15/2009
|1:54:54
|-
|11/18/2009
|2:55:36
|-
|11/19/2009
|3:39:32
|-
|11/21/2009
|6:25:18
|-
|Total
|26:56:36
|-
|Average
|2:59:37
|}

==Queues on 21 November 2009==
Chris's queues give a more complete perspective on his video-watching habits. Notable among the entries is a large number of mediocre-to-terrible romance films and documentaries; judging from their titles, they were chosen in the hopes of finding some [[mass debating]] material. There are also quite a few horror films.

===Instant Queue===
{| class="wikitable"
!Position
!Title
!Rating
|-
|1
|The Babysitters
|3.036
|-
|2
|The House Bunny
|3.239
|-
|3
|This Girl's Life
|2.928
|-
|4
|Carrie
|4.0*
|-
|5
|Transmorphers
|1.887
|-
|6
|9 1/2 Weeks
|3.174
|-
|7
|Dangerous Beauty
|3.79
|-
|8
|Dangerous Liasons
|3.753
|-
|9
|[[Monty Python|And Now for Something Completely Different]]
|5.0*
|-
|10
|30-Second Bunnies Theatre: Season 3
|3.0*
|-
|11
|Fear Dot Com
|2.633
|-
|12
|I Still Know What You Did Last Summer
|3.05
|-
|13
|The Story of O
|2.748
|-
|14
|En la Cama
|2.859
|-
|15
|Battle in Heaven
|2.222
|-
|16
|Grande Ecole
|2.735
|-
|17
|Heavy Metal
|5.0*
|-
|18
|Virtual Girl
|2.231
|-
|19
|Species IV: The Awakening
|2.786
|-
|20
|Frozen River
|3.395
|-
|21
|Bushwhacked
|3.39
|-
|22
|Keeping Up Appearances
|5.0*
|-
|23
|[[Red Skelton|The Red Skelton Collection]]
|5.0*
|-
|24
|American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile
|3.353
|-
|25
|Sex and Breakfast
|2.318
|-
|26
|Therese and Isabelle
|5.0*
|-
|27
|Virgin
|2.604
|-
|28
|Foreplay
|1.778
|-
|29
|Strictly Sexual
|3.011
|-
|30
|Sleepless in Seattle
|3.863
|-
|31
|Tender Is the Heart
|2.206
|-
|32
|Better Than Sex
|2.999
|-
|33
|If Lucy Fell
|2.996
|-
|34
|Nice Guys Sleep Alone
|2.924
|-
|35
|Shut Up and Kiss Me
|2.392
|-
|36
|Lovelife
|2.714
|-
|37
|Daffy Duck's Quackbusters
|3.803
|-
|38
|The Bugs Bunny Road Runner Movie
|4.047
|-
|39
|The NeverEnding Story
|3.913
|-
|40
|Inspector Gadget: The Original Series
|3.739
|-
|41
|The Nightmare Before Christmas
|3.953
|-
|42
|Pink Panther: Inspector
|3.696
|-
|43
|MythBusters: Big Blasts Edition
|4.213
|-
|44
|MythBusters: Collection 1
|4.21
|-
|45
|Tripping the Rift: Season 1
|3.317
|-
|46
|[[Monty Python|Monty Python's Flying Circus]]
|3.901
|-
|47
|American Swing
|2.673
|-
|48
|Indie Sex
|3.276
|-
|49
|Species III
|2.938
|-
|50
|Quarantine
|3.048
|-
|51
|Street Fighter II: Animated Movie
|3.103
|-
|52
|The Animatrix
|3.686
|-
|53
|The Pigkeeper's Daughter
|4.0*
|-
|54
|Video Vixens
|1.883
|-
|55
|I Want Candy
|2.534
|-
|56
|National Lampoon's Spring Break
|1.917
|-
|57
|Cartoon Noir
|2.427
|-
|58
|Memories
|3.667
|-
|59
|Read or Die
|4.054
|-
|60
|Air TV
|3.87
|-
|61
|Robotech: The Shadow Chronicles
|3.665
|-
|62
|Dead Space: Downfall
|3.277
|-
|63
|[[South Park]]: Season 1
|4.151
|-
|64
|South Park: Season 2
|3.904
|-
|65
|Tripping the Rift: Season 2
|3.622
|-
|66
|South Park: Season 3
|4.043
|-
|67
|Tripping the Rift: Season 3
|3.392
|-
|68
|South Park: Season 4
|4.127
|-
|69
|South Park: Season 5
|4.2
|-
|70
|South Park: Season 6
|4.267
|-
|71
|South Park: Season 7
|4.207
|-
|72
|South Park: Season 8
|4.24
|-
|73
|South Park: Season 9
|4.154
|-
|}
Chris's ratings are denoted with an asterisk.

===DVD Queue===
{| class="wikitable"
!Position
!Title
!Rating
|-
|1
|Sonic X: Season 5: Disc 2
|3.519
|-
|}
{| class="wikitable"
!Position
!Title
!Rating
|-
|1
|Sonic X: Season 6: Disc 1
|3.562
|-
|2
|Sonic X: Season 6: Disc 1
|N/A
|-
|3
|Beast Wars Transformers: Season 1: Disc 1
|3.838
|-
|4
|Beast Wars Transformers: Season 1: Disc 2
|
|-
|5
|Beast Wars Transformers: Season 1: Disc 3
|
|-
|6
|Beast Wars Transformers: Season 1: Disc 4
|
|-
|7
|Beast Wars Transformers: Season 2: Disc 1
|3.963
|-
|8
|Beast Wars Transformers: Season 2: Disc 2
|
|-
|9
|Beast Wars Transformers: Season 3: Disc 1
|3.965
|-
|10
|Beast Wars Transformers: Season 3: Disc 2
|
|-
|11
|Beast Machines: Transformers: Disc 1
|3.762
|-
|12
|Beast Machines: Transformers: Disc 2
|
|-
|13
|Beast Machines: Transformers: Disc 3
|
|-
|14
|Beast Machines: Transformers: Disc 4
|
|-
|15
|Transformers Armada: Ssn 1: Part 1: Disc 1
|3.493
|-
|16
|Transformers Armada: Ssn 1: Part 1: Disc 2
|
|-
|17
|Transformers Armada: Ssn 1: Part 1: Disc 3
|
|-
|18
|Transformers Armada: Ssn 1: Part 1: Disc 4
|
|-
|19
|Transformers Armada: Season 1: Part 2: 1
|3.464
|-
|20
|Transformers Armada: Season 1: Part 2: D 2
|
|-
|21
|Transformers Armada: Season 1: Part 2: D 3
|
|-
|22
|Transformers Armada: Season 1: Part 2: D 4
|
|-
|23
|Transformers: Energon: Vol. 1
|3.436
|-
|24
|Transformers: Energon: Vol. 2
|
|-
|25
|Transformers: Energon: Vol. 3
|
|-
|26
|Transformers: Energon: Vol. 4
|
|-
|27
|Transformers: Cybertron: Disc 1
|3.357
|-
|28
|Transformers: Cybertron: Disc 2
|
|-
|29
|Transformers: Cybertron: Disc 3
|
|-
|30
|Transformers: Cybertron: Disc 4
|
|-
|31
|Transformers: Cybertron: Disc 5
|
|-
|32
|Transformers: Cybertron: Disc 6
|
|-
|33
|Transformers: Cybertron: Disc 7
|
|-
|34
|Transmorphers
|1.887
|-
|35
|Transmorphers: Fall of Man
|2.26
|-
|36
|Carrie
|3.746
|-
|37
|Zombie Strippers
|2.556
|-
|38
|[[Fail|Twilight]]
|3.8
|-
|39
|Evan Almighty
|3.488
|-
|40
|Adult Swim & Stones Present: Mad Villain
|2.393
|-
|41
|Slayers: Return
|3.858
|-
|42
|Another 9 1/2 Weeks
|2.351
|-
|43
|The First 9 1/2 Weeks
|2.835
|-
|44
|Angels & Demons
|3.757
|-
|45
|Angels & Demons: Bonus Material
|2.933
|-
|46
|The Ring
|3.552
|-
|47
|The Ring Two
|3.0
|-
|48
|Are You Being Served? The Movie
|3.31
|-
|49
|Species II
|2.979
|-
|50
|Species
|3.131
|-
|51
|Fritz the Cat
|3.012
|-
|52
|The Nine Lives of Fritz the Cat
|2.934
|-
|53
|Very Private Lesson
|2.92
|-
|54
|Kekko Kamen Surprise!
|2.216
|-
|55
|Kekko Kamen Returns!
|2.339
|-
|56
|Kekko Kamen New!!
|2.361
|-
|57
|Kekko Kamen Strikes Back!
|2.559
|-
|58
|Nana Uncut: Vol. 1: Disc 1
|3.978
|-
|59
|Nana Uncut: Vol. 1: Disc 2
|
|-
|60
|Nana Uncut: Vol. 1: Disc 3
|
|-
|61
|Elfen Lied: Vol. 1: Vector One
|4.17
|-
|62
|Elfen Lied: Vol. 2: Vector Two
|
|-
|63
|Elfen Lied: Vol. 3: Vector Three
|
|-
|64
|Elfen Lied: Vol. 4: Vector Four
|
|-
|65
|Shaun of the Dead
|3.959
|-
|}

== Stuff ==
*http://www.mediafire.com/?mmyjjjeeo0k Instant Watching
*http://www.mediafire.com/?zyw2gkknyyj Instant Watching Queue
*http://www.mediafire.com/?h2jgmwddjy0 Ordered Queue

{{Lists}}

[[Category:Websites]]

McDonald's

2010-04-22T02:50:35Z

Marco: If the quote doesn't fit so hot, feel free to revert it.

{{taxpayermoney}}
{{quote|I don't go to McDonald's often, maybe 2 or 3 times a week.|Chris}}

[[Image:B-Manajerk.jpg|thumb|A typical visit to McDonald's]]

'''McDonald's''' is [[CWC|Chris's]] food of choice. Chris's ideal first [[dating|date]] would take place here. His favorite items are Chicken McNuggets and the $1 sweet tea.

Chris met the real life [[B-Manajerk]] in a Wal-Mart McDonald's.

Based on reports from [[Ivy]] in [[Mumble]] on 28 March [[2009]], Chris's preference for McDonald's is symbolic of his conflict with [[Bob Chandler|his dad]], who prefers Burger King.

===Possible cause for health problems===
Chris' [[Chris and health|inactive lifestyle and constant consumption of McDonald's]] may contribute to his growing [[obesity]], as well as his high cholesterol. The number of times Chris claims to eat food from McDonald's, 2-3 times a week, is equivalent to going 96-144 times a year. The latter is the equivalent of Chris eating 8-12 years worth of McDonald's food in a year's time. At this rate, Chris will likely develop serious medical problems. It's possible that he might develop heart disease or diabetes in the near future if he continues to live the way he does. The likelihood of him passing away before the age of 40 due to a heart attack or stroke increases each month.

==Conflict with Kacey==
During Chris's abortive attempt to win over [[Kacey]] as his [[sweetheart]], at her behest he made a feeble effort to clean up his act as far as exercise and eating right. One of Kacey's particular demands was that Chris quit eating fast food, an expectation he almost entirely failed to live up to. During his [[Father Call|phone call with Kacey and her father]], he claimed to have cut down to one McDonald's trip per week at best, and even that was unquestionably a lie.

Since Kacey's marriage to [[Liquid Chris]] in mid-November 2009, the McNuggets have almost certainly resumed their steady march down Chris's bottomless gullet.

==In the comics==
[[Image:Punchyfeedslayla.jpg|thumb|right|300px|"Have some fistfull fries!"]]
* There is a McDonald's in the [[CWCville Shopping Center]].
* [[Sub-Episodes]] [[Sub-Episode_4#Sub-Episode_4:_Christian_Chandler_in_.22McAttack.22|4]] and [[Sonichu_4#Sub-Episode_5:_Christian_Chandler_in_.22McAttack_part_2.22|5]] take place in "the city of M-C-Dville, of the region of [[Mal-Wart]]."
* A McDonald's ripoff, CWCee Dees (pronounced like "Mickey Dee's") appears in [[Sonichu 9]], where it seems to be a popular place to go on a date. [[Punchy]] took [[Layla]] there on their first date.

==McDonald's Monopoly 2009==
Chris has been stuffing his fat fucking face full of this shit since the Monopoly 2009 promotion started. He claimed to not care about it in a [[Brutal Legend Plus|video]], only to [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown#Results|create more accounts later and enter 65 codes from purchased goods]].

===Account 1 (October 6 - October 20)===
52 codes (43 of them from purchased things)

*52. St. Charles Place
*51. Oriental Avenue
*50. Baltic Avenue
*49. Park Place
*48. Marvin Gardens

===Account 2 (October 21)===
11 codes (10 of them from purchased things)

*11. Park Place
*10. North Carolina Avenue
*9. Illinois Avenue
*8. Community Chest (2)
*7. Oriental Avenue

===Account 3 (October 22 - October 23)===
7 codes (6 of them from purchased things)

*7. Park Place
*6. Community Chest (3)
*5. Illinois Avenue
*4. New York Avenue
*3. Electric Company

===Account 4 (October 23 - October 28)===
8 codes (6 from purchased things)

*8. Reading Railroad
*7. Luxury Tax
*6. North Carolina Avenue
*5. B. & O. Railroad
*4. Pennsylvania Railroad

{{Lists}}

{{Places}}
{{CWCverse}}
[[Category:Attraction Locations]]
[[Category:Places]]

User talk:Marco

2010-04-22T02:40:37Z

Marco:

User talk:Marco

2010-04-22T00:13:27Z

Marco: