CWCki - User contributions [en]

Slow-in-the-minds

2018-05-26T11:51:43Z

Master-baitor:

{{Quote|I do not feel comfortable associating with other autistic people, especially the non-high-funcional [sic]; it would be like looking through a Window to Hell to me.|Chris on other autistic people, [[IRC (17 December 2008)]]}}

[[File:That-cwc-look.jpg |thumb|200px|Chris, thinking.]]

"'''Slow-in-the-minds'''" and "'''slow-minded'''" are [[CWC-isms]] that refer to developmentally disabled, cognitively delayed, crazy, and/or generally unintelligent people (other than [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] himself, of course). The term was first seen in a 1999 [[Manchester_High_Leaks#Help_This_Unborn_Child|high school assignment]] about prenatal development, where Chris identified various factors that could cause newborn children to have "slow minds". It also showed up in his school project "[[A Week With Christian Chandler]]".

"Slow-in-the-minds" hits a fine trifecta of points. One, it displays Chris's [[Chris and his ego|arrogance]], seeing as how it applies to so many classes of people, all of whom he considers "slower" than he. Two, it shows Chris's [[Chris and his ego|lip-service attention to fitting into society]], it sounds incredibly ableist, and is just a childish euphemism. Three, there's a delicious irony in Chris decrying students who are "slow in the mind" when [[Honor roll|his own mental aptitude is dubious]].

In a number of responses from the [[Mailbag]], Chris has explained that he finds the mentally challenged (especially those with physical [[duck|deformities]]) creepy, likening them to zombies.<ref>[[Mailbag_5#In which Chris speaks ill of the handicapped|Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_11#Elevators are important for the handicapped, so they don't want any phobias|Mailbag 11]]</ref> In [[June 2013]], when someone on the [[CWCki Forums]] suggested that Chris date someone who was "mildly mentally retarded," Chris replied, "would YOU, in full honesty, full truth, in your right mind, at all, date a 'Special Girl'? How would you feel if you woke up the next morning with droning moaning and blather coming from the face next to you?"<ref>[[CWCki Forums#Re: Should Chris Consider Dating A 'Special' Girl?]]</ref> Chris's bigotry extends to his fellow [[Autism|autistics]] — he speaks in incredibly cruel and derisive terms about the various mental and physical problems that are thrust upon these innocent individuals, whereas he, as a self-proclaimed "[[Chris and his Ego|high-functioning]]" autistic, is pure and clean.

Despite that he seems to barely consider low-functioning autistics human, he often styles himself as a spokesperson for autism, making a stand against [[Asperger Syndrome]] in the non-existent conflict between autism and Aspergers. This delusion is made most apparent in the [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|CWCipedia article on Aspergers]]. It has been suggested that he says this to make himself look good, and also to complain that he should be receiving the care and attention that those with Aspergers receive.

Chris seems to interpret the "high-functioning" part of his diagnosis as a compliment, giving him the best of both worlds: he can blame any of his shortcomings on his autism, but still console himself with the fact that he's "high-functioning" and therefore better than the "slow-in-the-minds."

[[Image:Chris_and_Rule_34.jpg|thumb|[[Sonichu]] is also a slow-in-the-mind]]

==Uses by Chris==
Chris's use of this term has evolved over the years. Early on, he pointedly distinguished between the "slow-minded" and himself. In late 2009 and onward, however, he began referring to himself as "a little slow" or "sometimes slow," once he discovered he could use it as an excuse for his many failings.

* In [[A Week With Christian Chandler]], Chris described his peers on his school bus as "slow-in-the-minds."
* In [[Sub-Episode 6]], when exploring the ecology of the [[Jerkop]], Chris noted that "slow-minded people" are susceptible to becoming Mary Lee Walsh's rent-a-cop slaves. He added that because he is, of course, not slow-in-the-mind, he is immune to the "hypno-gun" that brainwashes the Jerkops.
* [[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]] featured, among other things, Chris attempting to correct the "misconception" that he is a "slow-minded person."
* In a [[IRC (18 December 2008)|December 2008 IRC chat]], when asked to give an example of learning from his mistakes, Chris said, "when it was spelled out for me that a sign by my side made me look slow-minded, when clearly I am not."
* Chris mentioned the same incident in a [[Chris_E-mails_2007#February|2007 e-mail]] to his old schoolteacher Virginia Sanford: "I've later realized that it made me look slow-minded; the 'R' Word."
* Conversing with his "fans" in [[Mumble 8]], Chris claimed, "For the record, I'm not, I'm not slow in the mind."
* While mocking a (legitimately mentally disabled) fan of his [[CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Naïve_YouTubers#CWC_Calls_Out_sonichuizcool|on YouTube]], Chris said, "You’re so [[naïve]] and slow in the mind."
* In [[Kacey Call 5]], Chris admitted "that I'm a little bit re-, that I'm a little bit slow sometimes."
* In [[Kacey Call 9]], Chris referred to a fellow high school student as "this one slow-minded individual named Tony" who "just kept on making all the moanings and noises and whatnot."
* During the [[Father Call]], Chris said, "I'll admit I have had some slow-minded moments."
* In his [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|CWCipedia article]] on Asperger's syndrome, Chris admitted that "my mentality is sometimes slow."
* While begging off from some of the difficult questions he faced in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9]], Chris whined about how "Sometimes my mind's a little slow."
* In the [[Regina e-mails]], Chris referred to Virginia gubernatorial candidates [[Wikipedia:Bob McDonnell|Bob McDonnell]] and [[Wikipedia:Creigh Deeds|Creigh Deeds]] as being "not so swift."
* In [[Jackie Chat 8]], Chris admitted that "I sometimes feel mentally slow."
* Likewise, in a July 2010 [[Jackie E-mails 3|e-mail to Jackie]], he said "I am sometimes mentally slow and don't get all of the details at once and such." This became a recurring theme in Chris's conversations with Jackie, as he repeatedly tried to use his "slow-mindedness" as an excuse. The [[Jackie E-mails 20|20th collection of e-mails]] has a few good examples.
* Talking about his high school days in the [[Lars Call]], Chris said, "Yeah, I got pretty much tormented for my autism and considerable slow-mindedness, that has happened to me before."
* Chris admitted to his private Facebook friends in [[February 2012 Facebook Posts#I Don't Know|February 2012]], "I'm slow on the take sometimes to often."
* At their December 2014 [[Catherine#The bowling outing|bowling outing]], Chris told [[Catherine]] and her cousin Al that the person responsible for the paperwork allowing him and his mother to move back into [[14 Branchland Court]] after the [[Destruction Of Chris's House|house fire]] was "a senile slow-in-the-mind."

== Sources ==
<references />

==See also==
*[[Chris-chan (forum)]]
*[[Chris and hypocrisy]]
*[[Jackie Chat 9]], where Chris discusses his experiences on the short bus.

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]

Yu-Gi-Oh!

2018-05-13T16:03:07Z

Master-baitor:

[[File:Chris-Chan's Yu-Gi-Oh Card.jpg|thumb|A TRUE and HONEST CWC-themed Monster Card.]]
[[Image:115-CWCEmbarassed.jpg|thumb|right|"I am STRAIGHT! STRAIGHT! Get it through your damn, dirty, immature skulls! ...and here's a drawing of me dressed as Dark Magician Girl :3 ."]]

'''''Yu-Gi-Oh!''''' is a Japanese manga about a boy named Yugi who, after solving an ancient artifact called the Millennium Puzzle, inherits a spirit named Yami in his body, and goes around playing a trading card game called Duel Monsters. The manga has spun off into an entire multimedia franchise, including several anime series coproduced by NAS and Studio Gallop, and an actual version of the CCG featured in the stories (produced by Konami, who sponsored the Anime), which emphasize trusting in "the heart of the cards" as a key skill.

[[Chris]] is a fan of the ''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' CCG, and has incorporated the use of its "spell cards" into ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]''. Much like his custom [[Pokémon]] cards, Chris has created dozens of homemade Yu-Gi-Oh! cards about himself and his characters.

==In Sonichu==

Chris employs ''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' references early on in the ''Sonichu'' series, usually to portray himself battling [[Wes Iseli]]. His ''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' influence peaks in [[Episode 12]], where Chris uses his deck of cards to prevent Wes from ruining the wedding of [[Sarah Hammer]] and [[William Spicer]]. Spicer himself is depicted as [http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20061104040054/yugioh/images/7/78/Jack'sKnightEEN-EN-R.jpg Jack's Knight], one of the characters in the cards, either because Chris couldn't draw him or didn't know what he looked like. A side plot in [[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]] is Chris beaming about his new friendship with [[Megan Schroeder]], whom he he met while playing ''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' at [[The GAMe PLACe]] in the summer of [[2005]]; this probably accounts for his unusual fixation on the game. Though the ability to turn trading cards into real effects seemed to be pretty effective at taking down Chris's foes, he evidently lost interest in the franchise not long after, and [[Metal Sonichu|the cards vanished from that point onward without explanation.]]

Chris has also drawn himself as [http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20090709225705/yugioh/images/8/8c/DarkMagicianGirlDPYG-EN-SR-1E.jpg Dark Magician Girl], a female ''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' character complete with hairy legs and Sonichu medallion. Whether this is an example of [[random-access humor]] or further evidence of Chris's [[Homos|sexuality issues]] remains unknown.

==Custom ''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' Cards==
A trend in some of his custom cards is that some of the effects on the cards rely on monsters being [[JERKS|male]] or [[Sweetheart|female]], such as "[[Virgin With Rage]]", "A Jerk", and "[[Attraction Sign|Girlfriend Attraction]]". This comes despite gender not being important in the official cards, and generally not even specified.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|+Monsters
|-
! Card
! Name
! Level
! Code
! Description
! Attack
! Defence
! Date
|-
| [[File:253-YuBchu.jpg|150px]]
| [[Blake |Black Sonichu]]
| 4
| CWC-009
| [Beast]
Blachu was cloned from Sonichu's DNA with a dose of Cherry Cola.
| 1600
| 1400
| August 11, 2004
|-
| [[File:126-YuCChan.jpg|150px]]
| [[Chris-chan Sonichu]]
| 5
| CWC-019
| [Beast]
His origin is unknown, but quandry [''[[Chris and English#Spelling|sic]]''] is brought up over the Sonichu-head mark on his chest.
| 2300
| 2000
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[File:189-YuSchu.jpg|150px]]
| [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]
| 4
|
| [Beast]
A speedy [[electric hedgehog pokemon]]. He transformed from a Pikachu after exposure to the seven Chaos Emeralds.
| 1600
| 1400
|
|-
| [[Image:223-SonichuZord2.jpg|150px]]
| [[Power Rangers|Sonichu Zord]]
| 8
| CWC-25
| [Machine]
Created by [[Dr. Eggman]] for [[Giovanni]]'s Rocket Rangers, it serves to stomp the [[Chaotic Combo]].
| 3500
| 3000
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:106-FrustratedVirgin.jpg|150px]]
| [[Virgin With Rage]]
| 2
| CWC-024
| [Warrior/Effect]
For each [[JERKS|male monster]] on the field, increase Virgin With Rage's attack by 500 points. For each [[Sweetheart|female monster]] on the field, increase Virgin With Rage's defense by 500 points.
| 500
| 500
| August 18, 2004
|-
| [[Image:140-AJerk.jpg|150px]]
| A [[Jerk]]
| 4
| CWC-38
| [Fiend/Effect]
If your opponent attacks with a female monster, she can only attack this jerk.
| 2000
| 1500
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:141-JerksLoiteringLot.jpg|150px]]
| [[Jerk]]'s Loitering Lot
| 4
| CWC-39
| [Fiend/Effect]
Each time you or your opponent normal, set or Special Summons a male monster on the field, place a counter on this card (max 3). You can remove all 3 counters from this card to destroy 1 male monster on the field.
| 0
| 2000
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:142-QuizGirlfriend.jpg|150px]]
| [[Gal-pal|Girlfriend?]]
| 3
| CWC-28
| [Fiend]
Could she be the love of my life? Probably not...; I'm sure she is already paired up with some jerk.
| 1000
| 2000
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:143-MaryLeeWalsh.jpg|150px]]
| [[Mary Lee Walsh|Hslaw Eel Yram]]
| 4
| CWC-29
| [Spellcaster/Effect]
Flip. Special summon 1 DARK monster from your hand onto your side of the field.
| 1500
| 1000
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:146-Jerkop.jpg|150px]]
| [[Jerkop]]
| 3
| CWC-44
| [Fiend]
This "copper" fiend wants to shatter the virgin's heart by destroying his tools for attracting a [[boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free woman]], just like how [[Mary Lee Walsh|Hslaw Eel Yram]] did.
| 800
| 1000
| September 5, 2004
|-
| [[Image:152-YuCrystal.jpg|150px]]
| [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal The Female Twin]]
| 3
| CWC-37
| [Warrior]
Beautiful and strong with courage and confidence. She will help her male counterpart, Christian Weston Chandler.
| 1300
| 1800
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:211-YuMetonic.jpg|150px]]
| [[Metonic]]
| 6
| CWC-005
| [Beast/Warrior]
His armor adds [[Obesity|weight]], so he can't perform a spin dash. His spikes are diamond-sharp.
| 2300
| 2500
| August 11, 2004
|-
| [[Image:218-YuUltSchu.jpg|150px]]
| [[Ultra Sonichu]]
| 10
| CWC-006
| [Beast/Effect]
Ultra Sonichu can only be Special Summoned by paying 500 life points when [[Sonichu]] is destroyed in battle. Then you can Special Summon this card from your hand or your deck.
| 3500
| 3000
| August 11, 2004
|-
| [[File:222-YuMSchu.jpg|150px]]
| [[List of Sonichu characters#Metal Sonichu|Metal Sonichu]]
| 8
| CWC-45
| [Machine]
This robot's sole purpose is to become stronger and faster to destroy [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].
| 2500
| 3000
| September 5, 2004
|-
| [[Image:237-YuRosechu.jpg|150px]]
| [[Rosechu]]
| 4
| CWC-004
| [Beast/Effect]
If Sonichu is face-up on your side of the field, increase attack of Sonichu and Rosechu by 500 points.
| 1500
| 1400
| August 11, 2004
|-
| [[Image:246-YuVamprosa.jpg|150px]]
| [[Vamprosa]]
| 5
| CWC-013
| [Beast]
Vamprosa's bite can suck the life out of her enemies. Her cape enables her to fly.
| 2000
| 1800
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[Image:255-YuSilvBchu.jpg|150px]]
| Silver [[Blachu]]
| 10
| CWC-49
| [Beast/Effect]
Silver Blachu can only be Special Summoned by paying 500 Life Points when [[Black Sonichu]] is destroyed in battle. You can then special summon this card from your hand or deck.
| 3500
| 3000
| September 5, 2004
|-
| [[Image:260-YuWild.jpg|150px]]
| [[Wild Sonichu]]
| 4
| CWC-014
| [Beast]
With his sharp razor leaf, speed and ninja skills, and he can he can escape into the wild.
| 1500
| 1000
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[Image:265-YuBubbles.jpg|150px]]
| [[Bubbles Rosechu|Bubble Rosechu]]
| 3
| CWC-015
| [Aqua]
She was raised by a mother [[Pokémon|Swampert]] who taught her how to create tidal waves.
| 1200
| 1000
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[File:270-YuAngelica.jpg|150px]]
| [[Angelica]] Rosechu
| 3
| CWC-016
| [Winged-Beast/Effect]
Prevent all effects of any of your opponent's spell cards to any of your face-up monsters.
| 1400
| 1000
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[File:275-YuPunchy.jpg|150px]]
| [[Punchy Sonichu]]
| 4
| CWC-017
| [Beast-Warrior]
He was raised in a dojo in Japan, where he lost his tail in a tough battle.
| 2000
| 1000
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[File:280-YuMagi.jpg|150px]]
| [[Magi-Chan]] Sonichu
| 4
| CWC-018
| [Spellcaster/Effect]
Each time your opponent activates a spell card, you may draw a card.
| 1400
| 1300
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[File:285-YuFlame.jpg|150px]]
| [[Flame the Sunbird]]
| 4
| CWC-48
| [Winged-Beast/Effect]
Flip. Return a monster to your side of the field to your hand in order to draw 1 card from your deck.
| 2000
| 1500
| September 5, 2004
|-
| [[File:288-YuBionic.jpg|150px]]
| [[Bionic the Hedgehog]]
| 4
| CWC-46
| [Beast]
Bionic is the world's greatest basketball player, and [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'s long-lost brother.
| 1800
| 1300
| September 5, 2004
|-
| [[File:294-YuWesLi.jpg|150px]]
| [[Wes-Li]] Sonichu
| 5
| CWC-020
| [Fiend/Effect]
If [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] is face-up on the field, increase Chris-chan Sonichu's attack by 500 points.
| 2300
| 2000
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[File:302-YuSahramah.jpg|150px]]
| [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarhamah Rosechu]]
| 7
| CWC-021
| [Fairy/Effect]
For each Light monster in the graveyard, increase Sarhamah's attack by 300 points.
| 2700
| 2500
| August 17, 2004
|-
|}

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|+Spells
|-
! Card
! Name
! Code
! Description
! Date
|-
| [[File:096-SonichuMedallion.jpg|150px]]
| [[Medallions|Sonichu Medallion]]
| CWC-41
| Increase the equipped monster's attack by 500 points. If the monster has [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]] in its name, increase its attack by another 500 points.
| September 5, 2004
|-
| [[Image:104-GirlfriendAttract.jpg|150px]]
| Girlfriend Attraction
|
| Special Summon 1 female monster from your hand or deck onto your side of the field.
| August 8, 2004
|-
| [[Image:105-LonesomeSelf.jpg|150px]]
| [[Virgin with rage|Lonesome Self]]
| CWC-012
| If you only have one monster on your side of the field, you can Special Summon 1 monster from your hand.
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[Image:107-HookedOnSonichu2.jpg|150px]]
| Hooked on [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]
| CWC-34
| This card is used to Ritual Summon any monster with Sonichu or Rosechu in its name. You must also offer monsters from the field or your hand whose total level stars equal the level stars of the ritual monster you are attempting to Ritual Summon.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:108-PlanForAttraction.jpg|150px]]
| Plan for [[Attraction Location|Attraction]]
| CWC-40
| Pick up (not draw) cards from the top of your deck until a female monster is picked up. Special Summon that card onto your side of the field. Shuffle all other picked up cards back into your deck.
| August 20, 2004
|-
| [[Image:109-CWCSpellsCard.jpg|150px]]
| "C.W.C" Spells Quick Spells!
| CWC-51
| Discard 1 Spell Card from your hand. Add 2 Spell Cards from your Deck to your hand, shuffle your Deck afterwards.

When activating this card, announce that you will "Activate your QuickSpells with your C.W.C. Spells!"
| May 21, 2006
|-
| [[Image:151-WisdomTeeth.jpg|150px]]
| [[Fangs|Wisdom Teeth]]
|CWC-31
| Increase your Life Points by 500 points for each Spell Card in your Graveyard and on your side of the field.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:153-GirlfriendsGift.jpg|150px]]
| [[Gal-pal|Girlfriend]]'s Gift
| CWC-33
| If your opponent has more Lifepoints, or monster on his/her side of the field, select 1 monster from either player's graveyard. Special summon that monster onto your side of the field.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:154-ApologyLetter.jpg|150px]]
| [[Mary Lee Walsh|Apology]] Letter
| CWC-011
| If your opponent has less life than you, he/she may draw 2 cards.
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[Image:157-CityOfCwcville.jpg|150px]]
| City of [[CWCville]]
| CWC-022
| Increase the attack of all monsters on the field with Sonichu, or Rosechu, in their names by 500 points.
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[Image:212-MetonicsSword.jpg|150px]]
| [[Metonic]]'s Sword
| CWC-008
| Only [[Metonic]] can be equiped with this card. The monster equiped with this card increases its attack by 1000 points.
| August 11, 2004
|-
| [[Image:213-MetalBoots.jpg|150px]]
| Metal Boots
| CWC-27
| The monster equiped with this card increases its defense by 500 points. The monster remains in defense position, and it can't shift into attack position.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:247-VamprosasCape.jpg|150px]]
| [[Vamprosa]]'s Cape
| CWC-26
| Only Vamprosa can be equipped with this card. The monster equipped with this card increases its defense by 1000 points.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[File:296-FireshockPendant.jpg|150px]]
| Fireshock Pendant
| CWC-42
| Increase the monster's attack by 500 points. And when this monster attacks during the damage step, decrease the attack of the monster you are attacking by 500 points.
| September 5, 2004
|-
| [[File:304-LightningBracelets.jpg|150px]]
| Lightning Bracelets
| CWC-43
| This card can only be equipped to [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarhamah Rosechu]]. Increase the equipped monster's attack and defense by 700 points.
| September 5, 2004
|}

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|+Traps
|-
! Card
! Name
! Code
! Description
! Date
|-
| [[Image:127-LevelBattle.jpg|150px]]
| Level Battle
| CWC-32
| You can activate this trap when your opponent attacks with his or her monster against one of your monsters. Compare each monster's number of level stars. The lower level monster is destroyed. If both stars are equal, neither monster is destroyed.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:138-CurseYeHaMeHa.jpg|150px]]
| [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha!]]
|
| Choose one of your opponent's [[JERKS|male monsters]] and destroy it. If you select a set monster, flip it over. If it is a female, she is not destroyed.
| August 9, 2004
|-
| [[Image:139-CWCsDarkGlare.jpg|150px]]
| [[The Creepy Stare|CWC's Evil Glare]]
| CWC-007
| Select 1 of your opponent's face-up monsters. Decrease that monster's attack and defense by 700 points. When the selected monster is destroyed or removed from the field, this card is also destroyed.
| August 11, 2004
|-
| [[Image:145-ShatteredHeart.jpg|150px]]
| Shattered Heart
| CWC-010
| You can activate this card when your opponent attacks with one of this/her monsters. Take control of that monster, and attack another of his/her monsters, or Life Points, then the controlled monster is destroyed.
| August 17, 2004
|-
| [[Image:147-LightKnife.jpg|150px]]
| Light [[Knife]]
| CWC-30
| Select 1 DARK monster on the field. That monster is destroyed.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:148-TrapOfFear.jpg|150px]]
| Trap of Fear
| CWC-46
| You can activate this card during your opponent's Standby Phase. Your opponent mush skip to his/her End Phase for the turn this card is activated.
| September 5, 2004
|-
| [[Image:149-RandomTrick.jpg|150px]]
| Random Trick
| CWC-35
| Roll a die.
*If you roll a 1 or 2, reduce opponent's attack to 0.
*If you roll a 3 or 4, switch the position of one of your monsters.
*If you roll a 5 or 6, destroy one of your opponent's monsters.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[Image:155-MindSwap.jpg|150px]]
| Mind Swap
| CWC-36
| Select one of your opponent's monsters, then he/she selects one of your monsters. Until the end of the turn this card was activated, each selected monster is controlled by the respected player.
| August 19, 2004
|-
| [[File:226-SchuBall2.jpg|150px]]
| [[S-Chu Ball]]
| CWC-023
| Select 1 of your opponent's face-up monsters. As long as the card is face-up on the field, the select monster remains in defense position. When the selected monster is destroyed, this card is also destroyed
| August 18, 2004
|-
| [[Image:375-ChaosEmeralds.jpg|150px]]
| 7 Chaos Emeralds
| CWC-50
| If you have [[Sonichu]] or [[Black Sonichu]] on your side of the field or in your hand, you may remove Sonichu from play to Special Summon Ultra Sonichu from your hand or deck onto your side of the field, or remove Black Sonichu from play to Special Summon Silver Blachu from the hand or your deck onto your side of the field. When this card is destroyed, [[Ultra Sonichu]] and/or Silver Blachu are destroyed and removed from play.
| September 5, 2004
|}

==Let's Play==
In [[March 2016]], [[CatKnight Interview|Arthur Spatchcock]] challenged Chris to a game of Yu-Gi-Oh! over the PS4. Spatchcock wanted to introduce Chris to the idea of doing Let's Plays to boost his online activity and help him gain some money through YouTube's monetization program<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chrischan-interview-part-4-5-3-28-16.16934/page-16#post-1317924</ref><ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-6#post-1496271</ref>. The plan fell apart after Let's Plays of [[CWC's Destiny start|Destiny]] and [[Live Game Stream - Uncharted|Uncharted]], since by that point, Chris was [[Chris and Health|too lazy]] to play video games for money, and he simply wanted to [[Financhu Crisis|beg from his audience]] instead.

Chris did not comment during the video, because he was "not in the mood," even though his mic was on and his TV audible in the background. Spatchcock tried to converse with him, but Chris ignored him<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chrischan-interview-part-4-5-3-28-16.16934/page-17#post-1318077</ref>.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Yugichris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Buh5pXTEZf0}}
| stardate = 12 [[March 2016]]
| subject = {{Video games|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| Saga = {{Selling Out|text}}
| previous = [[Happy Women's Day]]
| next = [[CWC`s Autism Tutorial with Director Commentary]]
}}

Spatchcock was not impressed with Chris's game strategy.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chrischan-interview-part-4-5-3-28-16.16934/page-18#post-1319296</ref>

{{quotebox|Chris was using a pre-built deck by the looks of it; it uses some weird ass summoning system where you can pretty much just keep summoning and fusing monsters over and over. Chris was doing it just to do it. No strategy, no planning, just randomly doing shit because the game prompted him to do so. Out of the found rounds we played I trounced him the first two easily...I had to dial back and let him win once I heard the stress sighing. The third round was pretty much given to him but the fourth round he actually seemed to finally have it down on how to use his cards.

This is mentioned in the fourth call but I can share it here without Chris feeling 'betrayed' but I actually bought Chris the game because I set up a wager with him. We're going to play a 2 out of 3 match; if I win Chris is supposed to draw new sonichu pages and if he wins I get him a new PS4 game. He was bragging about how he still has his old cards including Dark Magician Girl. I assume before out big match he's going to build his own deck and I can't wait to see what he comes up with. }}

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
File:311-RedDarkMeggician.jpg|Megan as the Dark Magician. Oddly, she seems to be dressed as Arkana's red Dark Magician from Episode 60 of the show, even though she says that she's been summoned by Yami.
Image:120-CWCSpells.jpg|[[Sonichu 5|CWC-Spells!]]
Image:Jack's Knight as William Spicer.jpg|Jack's Knight, some character from ''Yu-Gi-Oh!''
</gallery></center>

==See also==
*[[Card_games#Yu-Gi-Oh.21_TCG|''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' TCG]]

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
*[[Wikipedia:Yu-Gi-Oh!|''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' Wikipedia article]]

[[Category:Hobbies]]
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]
[[Category: Chris-chan videos, 2016]]

Kick the Autistic

2018-05-05T16:52:56Z

Master-baitor: /* Miscreant Style */

<center>[[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]]</center>
[[Image:KickTheAutisticWii.jpg|thumb|Game of the Year, every year. Available on the Wii...]]

'''Kick the Autistic''' is a game that consists of doing anything [[Chris]] doesn't like. He alleges it is America's favorite, owing to the frequency of his antagonists playing it.

==Variations==
[[File:Kta.PNG|thumb|...and on the [[Car pranks|blatantly-stupid]] [[HEXBox]]!]]
There are many known variations of the game, and below are the most noteworthy.

===Artistic Style===
Enter a competition of artistry where Chris is also competing, and [[Honor roll|beat him]]. This is generally easily done by showing any competence at all. Favored by [[Manchester High School#Graduation|his fellow students]] and [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|that no-good]] [[Adam Stackhouse]]. Beware: Chris may [[CWC is Angry|get grumpy and print your picture out to shoot at]], or beat you up in ''[[Soul Calibur]]''.

===Chris Style===
Set yourself up as one of the most visible and recognized representatives of autism within [[Chris and the Internet|internet]] culture. [[Chris and negotiation|Act like an entitled child]] and [[Chris and sex|develop]] horrifying [[recycling|perversions]], which you discuss freely on [[YouTube]]. Give other autistic people as well as those with [[Asperger's Syndrome]] (which he hates) a bad reputation by association. There is a 100% chance this will result in them trolling you.

===[[Blanca]] Style===
Pretend to be a [[boyfriend-free girl]]. Take the time to befriend Chris, until he trusts you. Once that happens, get him to send you something of value to him, and record yourself destroying it.

===[[Jimmy Hill]] Style===
If you are an artist troll or just bored, plagiarize Chris's own plagiarized comics. Chris is very funny about the material which he has plagiarized, and he will throw a fit and take legal action against you "if not removed by 14 days."

===[[Sweetheart]] Style===
Pretend to befriend Chris, known for being of the completely clueless type and willing to trust anyone who claims to have a [[china]]. Then, when you have gained his trust, tell him to do something amusing. Say you are a woman who is turned on at the thought of him [[recycling]]. Once this happens, put the goods up on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[Kiwi Farms]], and sit back as you watch them get their [[Laughs Under Lucricities]].

===[[Man in the Pickle Suit|Pickleman]] Style===
Go to [[Virginia]] and somehow meet up with Chris while wearing a pickle costume. He will be bewildered by it, and too powerless to act.

===[[The Miscreants|Miscreant]] Style===
Set [[Sonichu|events]] in motion that will keep Chris from [[Virgin with rage|ever getting laid]]. Physically [[Chris and health|weaken]] him so that he can't even [[iPods Down and Listen Up|rape]] a woman to lose his virginity, or do anything else for that matter. Extra points for clouding up [[BlueSpike|his]] [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|judgement]]. As an added "fuck you," send <s>an impostor</s> [[Liquid Chris|The True and Honest Christian Weston Chandler]] to swipe [[Kacey|his sweetheart.]]

Keep doing this for the rest of his life, then send him to Hell where he'll be trolled for all eternity...or reincarnated as a pickle; whichever. The current champion of this style is Chris himself.

===[[Liquid]] Style===
<s>Pretend that you are</s> Be the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of [[Sonichu]], the electric hedgehog Pokémon. Upload videos on [[YouTube]] detailing your many encounters with [[Clyde Cash]] and your success at attracting a boyfriend-free girl. Brag about the millions you have earned thanks to Sonichu, and try to conquer the Sonichu media empire that is rightfully yours. Bonus points if you purchase ad space on the [[CWCipedia]].

Alec Benson Leary of [[Asperchu]] has used a similar tactic, to much the same effect.

===[[Michael Snyder]] Style===
Give Chris [[List of places that have banned Chris|the banhammer]], thus preventing him from going to [[The GAMe PLACe|his favorite establishment]], for [[Chris and anger|no]] [[Chris and his Ego|good]] [[death threats|reason]] other than [[Autism#Chris and other autistics|sheer hatred for autistic people]]. Patiently wait until he tries to come back to his rightful place, and then [[28 October 2011#Email?|rub your legs on his car's bumper in order to fake injury]]. Sue Chris for damages and bribe [[July 2012 Facebook posts#Court|whoever needs to be bribed]]; once this is done, you'll be rolling in the dough.

===[[Chris and religion|God]] Style===
Refuse to bail out the one and only Autistic Hero and center of your universe, Christian Weston Chandler of [[Ruckersville, VA]] whenever he hits parked cars, [[28 October 2011|trespasses on private property]], [[Mal-Wart|vandalizes store displays]], or [[26 December 2014|maces GameStop employees]]. Grant prayers to people with concerns that aren't half as important as winning glorious victory over the Trolls and Cyber-Bullies. Finally, [[Destruction Of Chris's House|refuse to step in when your Autistic Hero accidentally sets his home ablaze]].

===[[Gal pal|Gal Pal]] Style===
Reveal that [[Kellie Andes|you]] were [[Gal pal#Betrayal|just friends with him out of pity]]. Then, when Chris [[Chris and anger|throws a tantrum]] about it, turn that pity into laughter by linking to one of [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|his videos]] for all of his former gal pals to see just how far he's fallen since they've last seen him. Then, when the [[Catherine]] saga is coming to a close, reveal yourself as the fabricating troll mastermind behind both the admitting of befriending Chris out of pity, and the saga itself.

===[[Sega]] Style===
Push your biggest fan's buttons by changing the arm color of your main hero from tan to blue in your latest game. Watch as Chris gets [[blangry]] and [[Sonic Boom Protests|declares war on your franchise]]. Crack open [[Fanta|a cold one]] as this leads to Chris [[26 December 2014|pepper-spraying]] a [[JERK]] for trying to stop him, winding up in [[Jerkops|jail]], and [[Sonic Boom Protests#You Dropped a Glitterbomb on Me, Baby|learning absolutely nothing]].

===[[Financhu Crisis]] Style===
Grant the Chandlers another mortgage on [[14 Branchland Court]], so they can have more spending money for their hoards, then [[stress]] them out by holding them to a payment plan.

===[[Pmurt]] Style===
Gradually work your way up in life to become a billionaire, and eventually the President of the United States. Watch as Chris films himself [[Eid, Pmurt, Eid|threatening death on you by smashing his own toys]].

===[[DoopieDoOver|Doopie]] Style===
Be a voice actress/artist who Chris orbits on Twitter. Accept his money to draw art commissions for him, then take cover as [[weens]] make fake pledges on your Patreon while Chris begins calling you "darling" and spamming your business email. Finally, call him out in public for being creepy and spending beyond his means, then step back as Chris tries to win you over by painting a bulls-eye on himself and telling everyone to [[HarassCWCdirectly]]. For bonus points, join the [[Kiwi Farms|trolls' internet forum]] and [[Doopie E-mails|leak the emails he had sent to you]]. Afterwards, have Chris talk with one of your [[LadyOfTheCosmo|best friends]], and have them start a flame war. If done right, have her [[A-Log]] Chris throughout all of her posts for him displaying the same creepy behaviour towards her.

===[[Jessica Quinn|Quinn]] Style===
Be one of Chris' Facebook friends over a span of years and latch onto him when he's desperate for a girlfriend. As soon as you see him stalking a [[DoopieDoOver|voice actress]] on LazyCast, break up with him, wait for him to film himself crying about it, and then get back together with him. Be sure to goad him into making a rage video cursing [[Kiwi Farms]] trolls by completely ending the relationship one day before you were set to meet in real life and saying that they had hacked your Facebook as the reason.

===[[Idea Guy]] Style===
When you notice Chris's [[Chris and reality|detachment from reality]] and [[Autism|his gullibility]], take advantage of both to troll him. First, make up stories about [[Hyperdimension Neptunia|the various happenings]] of [[Sonichu (comic)|his creation]], and then inform Chris about them. Afterward, tell Chris to do a number of ridiculous tasks that you know will fly over his head, whether it be telling him to write "I have a penis" in Japanese, whilst making him think it's his signature, or forcing him to do the ''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.'' chant, whilst making him think it's an [[CWC-isms#A|anchuent]] Cherokean chant. Chris's response to such coercion will vary, so use it wisely. This style is bound to work if you inform him that Rosechu has a pickle, though.

===[[Michael Hirtes|Hirtes]] Style===
[[File:ChrisKicksHirtes.png|thumb|How to lose the game spectacularly]]
If you have no creativity or aren't skilled enough to execute the above versions of play properly, but you want to use Chris's tard rage to cover up your lulzyness, you may want to use this variation of the game as a last resort. First, you'll want to create more than five Twitter sockpuppet accounts to spam Chris with, and then share your hard work and effort on the [[Kiwi Farms]] to get as many people impressed as possible. Once somebody figures out your shenanigans, try to cover it up in a half-assed fashion. Once you've done that, simply continue spamming Chris every time he posts on Twitter, usually with some dead meme that anyone else would find cringy or by telling the rest of Twitter how horrible Chris is compared to you. By all means, never try to play the game this way, you are always bound to lose regardless of how you try to execute it, as Chris will never rage over your unfunny shitposts let alone respond to them, and you'll only end up being the butt end of the joke in the end. Double Dumbass points if it is Chris who ends up kicking you instead.

===Literally===
Examples of literally kicking the autistic include: the teachers at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]] (allegedly), [[Jerkop]]s (probably exaggerated) and [[Niggos#Niggos in Chris's life|TJ from GAMe PLACe]] (almost).

Chris has never experienced any substantial physical pain in his entire life that we know of. No broken bones or bare knuckle fights. His parents never raised a hand against him. There is also no evidence of him ever being grounded, or punished in any significant way – even after being [[Bob Walks In|caught masturbating in the kitchen]]! The only citation provided by Chris of physical pain whatsoever is an anecdotal story about the time that [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]] tried to teach him how to roller-skate. Chris fell and skinned his knee, vowing never to roller-skate again.

Because Chris has never been through the "school of hard knocks" ([[Charlottesville_Fashion_Square#Chris_vs._Fashion_Square|even running away if a confrontation seems imminent]]), he seems pretty confident that he [[Mary Lee Walsh|can]] [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|tell]] [[Clyde Cash|any]][[Michael Snyder|one]] [[Death threats|any]][[Chris and race|thing]] [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|he]] [[Michael_Snyder_is_ColdHearted_and_Mean|wants]] without fear of consequence. On [[28 October 2011]] and [[26 December 2014]], respectively, Chris committed crimes which could have seen him end up in jail, where inmates don't take kindly to [[Chris and anger|temper tantrums]]. Fortunately for him, he evaded both fates, but the latter incident saw Chris getting a probation, and he won't be as lucky if he gets in trouble with the law again during the period.

==Uses by Chris==
[[File:CWC gets kicked.jpg|thumb|A self-administered kick]]
Recorded examples of this particular [[CWC-isms|CWC-ism]] include the following:

*In the e-mail he sent to Sony after losing [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]], Chris blamed his failure on "AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, 'KICK THE AUTISTIC!'"
*At the same time, in his first [[PSN Blogs|PSN blog entry]] cursing [[Adam Stackhouse]], he bitched and mixed his metaphors about how "I have been the dog in America's favorite game, 'KICK THE AUTISTIC' for my whole life."
*After finding out that [[PandaHalo|Panda]] was a troll during [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], Chris whined, "And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of 'Kick the Autistic'."
*Addressing [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] users on [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica#21 January|21 January 2008]], Chris wrote ''"And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of "KICK THE AUTISTIC", [[Chris and hypocrisy|then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.]]"''
*A variation was used in Chris's second version of [[It's UGH!#Remake|Ok2bgay]], with Chris opening the video with the words "Merry Kickmas".

==See also==
*[[Jerkop]]
*[[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] - [[Video games|Video game]] president, hoping to release Kick the Autistic on all major [[Nintendo]] consoles in time for [[Christmas]].
*[[Trolls]]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]][[Category:Things Chris hates]]