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Megan Schroeder

2018-08-03T06:54:50Z

MindHit: /* Megagi La Scapegoat */

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{{Articleofthenow}}
{{quote|Ah, For Her I Would travel even A Thousand Miles, just to be with her. Fortunately, she lives only about one hour from my house, and I meet her once a week at a closer-to-home social. This feeling, It was, and still is, so pure and true, it was like as if I was Born to Love Her. When She Smiles, I feel like I'm Walking on Sunshine as I give my replying smile and gaze into her eyes. And her hair is the softest and most warm-tingling. Cloud Nine? I feel like I'm on Ten.|Christian, ''[[Story of My Current Days]]''}}
{{Quote|ED didn't drag my name through the mud but you did.
I don't know, I can't keep disgracing myself and forgiving and forgiving. I have some pride you know. I've forgiven you so many times before it's just getting irritating now. Even I have my limits.|Megan gives her own view<ref>[[Megan emails, 2008]]</ref>}}

{{infobox
| title = Megan Schroeder
| image = [[Image:ChrisAndMeganUnpixelated.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Name
|data1 = Megan Schroeder
|label3 = Date of Birth
|data3 = 23 July 1986 (age {{Age|1986|7|23}})
|label4 = Gender
|data4 = Female
|label5 = Nationality
|data5 = [[United States|American]]
|label6 = [[Chris and race|Race]]
|data6 = White
}}

'''Megan Schroeder''' (born 23 July [[1986]]) is a former [[gal pal]] of [[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s, with whom he had perhaps the closest relationship with anybody he's ever had in his life.

Chris first met Megan in the summer of [[2004]] at [[The GAMe PLACe]]. Following Chris's progressively creepier unwanted advances, she cut off contact with him in early [[2008]]. Since then, Chris has developed an intense and unwarranted [[Chris and anger|grudge]] against her, thanks to misconceptions fed to him by [[Borb]], and his [[autism|autistic delusions]] about her scheming with [[Michael Snyder]] to have him banned from The GAMe PLACe. Chris's attempted contacts with Megan have dragged on as late as [[2018]].

==Timeline==
[[Image:Megan_Timeline_Prototype.png|1000px|center]]

==Prologue==
{{main|Megan Emails, 2005-2006}}
{{See also|Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007}}
[[Image:156-CWCMegan1.jpg|thumb|Look at the fear in her eyes...]]

{{quote|During the late summer months, I picked up and started the [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] [[Trading Card Game]] (it was around the time the movie came into theaters). One Saturday at the Game Place (Where I was also going for Pokemon TCG on Fridays), I met Megan and [[John's Custom Gundam|John Schroeder]]. At first I thought they were a couple but then they were just Sister and Brother. Over the months of getting to know Megan, I grew fond of her. Although at that time, and up to now, she wasn't interested in a lovely relationship. I've bided to her wishes and requests. I am truly fond of her, and I hope she will have a change of heart soon. She'll be turning 21 on July 23, 2007.|Christian<ref>[[Yep, I'm on TV :)]]</ref>}}

Megan is a typical ''truly'' [[boyfriend-free girl]], even claiming to be [[Chris_and_sexuality#Asexuality|asexual]]. She had a few eccentricities, which Chris was more than happy to copy and oblige, namely her fondness for ''[[My Little Pony]]'', ''[[Sailor Moon]]'', and using Chris like a debit card because she was too lazy to go on [[eBay]] herself.

Megan and Chris first met at The GAMe PLACe in summer 2004, over a game of ''Yu-Gi-Oh!''. The two apparently struck up a friendship of sorts. They had an obvious connection from the start, since they were both idling their twenties away playing [[card games]] marketed to preteens. It only took [[Third date|a few games]] and a handful of e-mails before Chris saw Megan as his [[sweetheart]]. Megan, however, did not reciprocate this sentiment. It probably didn't help that Megan was getting Chris to buy things for her like a stereotypical wife nagging her husband:

{{quote|Please can you get this video for me? please hurry! thanks!|Megan, [[Megan_Emails,_2005-2006#Megan_wants_a_Tin_Tin_episode|Megan E-mails]]}}

Through the end of 2005 and into [[2006]], Chris would obsess over Megan, writing her [[Sonichu 5|into his comic]], trying to drag her into dates, trying to snuggle, hold her hand, kiss her, and other attempted romantic gestures. This didn't accomplish anything but rousing the ire of Megan, who was uncomfortable with these advances and only saw him as a friend, nothing more. She repeatedly tried to assert her asexuality to Chris, in an effort to prevent his advances. Sadly, this fell on deaf ears, and Chris would continue to hound her. Even when Megan eventually resorted to claiming she had a boyfriend, Chris was not deterred.

Unfortunately for her, this was only the beginning...

==Megan Saga==

===Sailor Megtune===
{{Main|Sailor Megtune}}

Megan, like Chris, enjoyed drawing cartoons, and this seems to have caught Chris's eye early in the game:

{{quote|Everytime I see your drawings, I get inspired to want to work more on [[Sonichu (comic)|my comics]].|Christian, [[Megan_Emails,_2005-2006#Chris_wants_to_date_Megan_at_McDonald.27s|Megan E-mails]]}}

In what was a fortunate alignment of his ass-kissing campaign with the series of diary entries that ''Sonichu'' had become, Megan (later [[retconned]] as '''Meg-chan''') soon made her first appearance as [[Sailor Megtune]] in [[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]] along with [[Megagi La Skunk]], her own furry sidekick. The two are purportedly "[[Sailor Moon|Sailor Soldiers]]" and reveal on the spot that Chris is an old friend of theirs (including Megagi) and thwart the evil Jerkops trying to ruin Chris' [[Love Quest]] with Rockin' Hurricane, causing Magic Rocket to [[Team Rocket|blast off again]]. Her influence on the "art" of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' is apparent in Chris's sudden transition to a more [[anime]] style with ''Sonichu'' #5, most notably in his character's eyes, which became large and shiny.

[[Image:SchuComic6Page50a.jpg|thumb|Getting dangerously close to crossing the line...]]

Megan and Chris appeared to chat about comics in their e-mail conversations; Chris [[Ego|critiqued]] some of her story ideas, and ran the plotline for [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]] by her, including a bizarre offer to write in Megan's own imaginary daughter. While Megan probably found the whole thing harmlessly eccentric at first, ''Sonichu'' #5 managed to create some drama pretty quickly upon its release. Megan undoubtedly flipped when she saw her character getting romantic with Chris, as well as being portrayed in a sexualized manner. Chris completely failed to comprehend why she was angry, but did [[retcon]] a couple of pages to tone them down. This did not placate Megan, however.

===Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown===
{{main|Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown}}
{{See also|Megan Emails, Aug-Dec 2007}}

{{quote|In any case, I LOATHE [[Adam Stackhouse|Adam]] and his Sister for STEALING my one chance at taking my Sweet [[Gal pal|Gal-Friend]] to [[Wikipedia:Seattle|Seattle]]; [[Chris and rape|it would have been terriffic]]. I might have even been able to change her outlook on not planning on having children (she and I are both virgins; although I am a [[stress|FRUSTRATED]], High-Functionally [[autism|AUTISTIC]], 25-YEAR OLD [[Virgin with rage|VIRGIN]].|[[PSN Blogs]]}}

In June [[2007]], Megan went to [[Wikipedia:Kentucky|Kentucky]]. Undeterred, Chris continued e-mailing her, refusing to back away even for a moment as he ''still'' believed that, deep down inside, Megan truly did love him. Discovering Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown and the prizes for victory, Chris eagerly entered the contest, hoping to win a [[PSP]] and use the trip offered in the contest to win her [[china|heart]]. In the end, as expected, Chris lost (even after extensive cheating), [[Adam Stackhouse]] won, and Megan didn't care. Even when Chris began whining to her and others about how Adam and everyone else except Chris had somehow cheated, Megan didn't care either way. This childish behavior eventually resulted in Megan losing her temper with Chris, reprimanding him for his selfishness and inappropriate behavior. Despite being hurt by her outburst, Chris continued to harass Megan in much the same way as before.

===Rule 34 and The End of Megan===
{{Main|ShecameforCWC.JPG}}
{{See also|Megan emails, 2008}}

{{quote|And, by the way, that is not ''Crystal'' whose eyes are censored; that is ''Megan''!|Chris stating [[Chris and art|the not-so-obvious]]<ref name="secondmessage">[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref>}}

In November 2007, Chris would discover his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page and begin his one-man crusade [[Sonichu 8|against the garbage]]. In the process, he uploaded a number of [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|pornographic and lewd]] artworks, one of which was [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|a picture of him fingering Megan]] with her eyes obscured. Trolls originally believed that she was [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|his imaginary sister Crystal]], which prompted an outraged Chris to try to deny accusations of incestuous desires by revealing that the image was actually meant to represent Megan.<ref>[[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica#March 2008|Chris confirms Megan's identity on 18 March 2008.]]</ref><ref name="secondmessage"/>

By 12 [[March 2008]], Megan discovered the picture depicting her and demanded that it be removed immediately. Chris attempted to do so, but found himself blocked at every turn. His edits were quickly reverted, or even worse, compounded, as he tried to upload other versions of the picture with the face cropped out or obscured. On 21 [[April 2008]] Megan wrote an email to Chris saying she was not comfortable being around him anymore,<ref>[[Megan emails, 2008#Megan can't trust Chris anymore]]</ref> thus putting an end to their friendship.

Throughout the fiasco, Chris brashly attempted to paint himself as a greater victim than Megan, initially even assuming that she didn't understand what was going on in the picture. He would later admit he did it in part to suppress '''the occasional impulse to [[rape]] her''', and that trying to assert that what she was going through just BEING in the picture and learning what he could have done was ''nothing'' compared to the misery of the [[troll]]ing he was enduring.<ref>[[Megan_Emails,_2008#Chris_continues_bothering_her_about_ED]]</ref>

Evidence suggests that Megan was distancing herself from Chris even before she discovered the awful drawing. Comments by former GAMe PLACe patrons Daniel Mimms and [[Lucas]] indicate that Megan was already avoiding Chris before she found out ShecameforCWC.<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Initial post|Mimms and Lucas Q&A]]: "Megan would usually stand/hide behind me and Lucas to avoid [Chris], '''especially after''' the drawings of her got leaked [emphasis added]." This comment suggests that Megan was avoiding Chris before ShecameforCWC came to her attention. In their [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Chris and Megan|discussion of Megan]], Mimms and Lucas seem to attribute Chris's groping as the main factor behind the deterioration of his relationship with her, while giving little weight to ShecameforCWC.</ref> Chris himself has partially confirmed this account on the [[CWCipedia]].<ref>[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Megan+Schroeder Megan]: "When I started getting too close, [Megan] started to feel uncomfortable, My Bad. Then she distanced herself from me, saw other dudes, including a possible homosexual."</ref> It might very well be that ShecameforCWC was the last step in euthanizing a dying relationship, rather than killing a vibrant and living one.

==Aftermath==
{{quote|Too bad I was never just that too all into him.|Cartoon Megan, "I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC"}}

{{quote|Megan... WHY?!|Christian,
"I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC"}}

Despite Megan telling him she was no longer comfortable being in his presence, Chris was not willing to give up on her. On 11 [[2008#June|June 2008]], Chris sent an email to a person named Tyler Wane, asking Tyler to deliver Megan the birthday gift Chris bought for her (a German-English dictionary). Chris said he could not deliver her the gift himself due to being "forced into hiatus from the Pokemon League by that S.O.B. [[Michael Snyder|Mike]]". Tyler in response suggested to Chris to arrange meeting with Megan outside [[The GAMe PLACe]].<ref><[[Chris emails 2008#June]]</ref>

Megan surfaced again in Chris's thoughts in [[July 2009]], first in the [[CWC "Boyfriend"]] video, and then in the subsequent update, [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC]]. Chris also [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCo72hJ-SAg reposted] the Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown entry, though this version is slightly different from the ones frequently seen in latter days: After "...my friend Megan!", Chris inserted a short break with a photo of him and Megan, with a lovely heart frame. Either this is the original version before Chris tried to clean up his image, or a brand new version with new improved references to the long-lost love.

On 26 [[March 2009]], he released a [[CWC Major Update 26 March 2009 |Captain's Log]] where he told everyone to [[Chris and Hypocrisy|"leave her alone"]] because she was going through [[stress]] from the [[trolls]], and threatened to stop drawing the comic if they didn't. At the beginning of the video Chris claims that he was recently contacted by Megan, though it was most likely a troll posing as her seeing as she had cut off all ties with him.

On 12 [[August 2009]], he dedicated a song to Megan in one of his [[KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special]] videos, where the first sign that he'd convinced himself that she'd told him "I Love You" comes up (and he remains relatively consistent when speaking of her in acting as though this actually happened).

{{quote|Coming up next at #7, we got another long-distance dedication, to the old [[gal-pal]] of mine that I almost had a ra- I had meant to be- I had her "I love you" before I got kicked out, Megan Schroeder, her, from her favorite, this is from her favorite h-artist, Yngwie Malmsteen.|Christian, "[[KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special]]"}}

In 2010, he created a [[:File:ModNation GalPal.jpg|model of Megan]] for ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' (named "Gal Pal"), showing that he still couldn't let go.

=== Chris's version of events ===
On 16 [[May 2010]], the [[CWCipedia]]'s new fan manager Daria Camacho created a page for Megan, using the link on Chris's page of [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|gal-pals and sweethearts]]. When Chris discovered it, he erased all of Daria's text and wrote his own version. The abridged version of events he presents is much shorter than his gigantic [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia page)|rant on The Wallflower]], probably because the events of the Megan Saga are beginning to fade from his memory.

{{quotebox|If you REALLY MUST KNOW...

Megan and I first met at a Yu-Gi-Oh Tournament at The G&H Place, back when it was still in the Downtown Mall. It was around the time the Y.G.O. Movie debuted in theaters. She and I, we talked, hung out and became really good friends.

"I DID have lovey-dovey feelings for her, and I still care about her as a friend. I did her a number of favors by getting her this and that off of eBay, then she would reimburse me the cost of each item.

When I started getting too close, she started to feel uncomfortable, My Bad. Then she distanced herself from me, saw other dudes, including a possible [[homos]]exual.

I drew that drawing of her and me that is unfortunately popular among everyone who tends to haze me for TWO REASONS. Firstly, because of My Own Wishful Thinking. And second a tool in a lame attempt to overcrowd the E.D. page against me with Bu**C*** with my own "information" to shut it down.

Ever since, she totally spaced herself from me, like as if she had put a restraining order against, which she did not. And as I was being forced off the Place premesis the last day I was there, she stood by and watched in shock. She could have spoken up for me, but she did not.

I have lost communication with Megan since then.}}

In the months and years after his "breakup" with Megan, Chris came to try and act as if he'd gotten over her. His [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia page)|CWCipedia page]] on [[The Wallflower]], for instance, claimed "I had LOOOOOONG moved on from Megan."

However, a lingering attachment betrayed itself on occasion. The archive of his [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|female acquaintances]] on the CWCipedia noted, "I still miss her sometimes." In an [[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2#Chris_lies_about_The_Game_Place|e-mail to Jackie]] from April 2010, when he recounted having his picture taken at The GAMe PLACe, Chris said, "I was in a state of shock from seeing Megan and (her short-lived romance) Christopher MAKING OUT. '''That Should Have Been Me.'''"

==The Blame Game==

=== Origins ===
[[File:Megan Schroeder - 2013 September.jpeg|thumb|Megan, years later, still recovering from her ordeal. Out of frame: JERK.]]
The [[Matthew Noble call]] of August 2010 revealed that [[Bob]] and [[Barbara]] disliked and distrusted Megan, believing that she conspired with Michael Snyder and "some [[homos]]exual[s]" to get Chris banned from The GAMe PLACe. Barbara also mentions how Megan "lied" about something, suggesting that she believes Megan to be a troll.

It is possible that this belief originated with Chris, as in his correspondence with [[Katie Bay]], he lists Megan as a "possible troll".<ref>[[Katie_Bay_E-mails_2#26 July]]</ref> His reasoning was typical Chris - she had a vagina and didn't want to give him access to it. He also appears to have [[Autism|confused her with another white female brunette]] that placed a sign on his lawn on [[Halloween]] [[2008]].

=== Chris Doxes Megan ===

A series of leaked Facebook postings beginning in [[February 2012]] revealed Chris' ever-growing, pathological, and extreme hatred for Megan. His animosity for Megan supposedly grew much more vitriolic after buying into his parents' [[Chris and reality|completely baseless]] belief that Megan was responsible for the "Hate and Smear Campaign" against Chris:

{{quote|EVERYONE, I have most urgent news. It is Final in My Mind, and from my mother as an eye and ear witness of her consorting with [[Michael Snyder]] LONG Before Novembef, [[2007]]; Megan Schroeder IS the SEED of the Whole Hate and Smear Campaign Against Me on the [[Internet]]. If any of you all Know where she is, or have clues of her, or her brother...current wherabouts, Please Inform Me on THIS WALL, Posthaste. She is Needed Brought to me, my mother and [[Rob Bell|our attorney]], for Great Questioning, and a Huge Piece of my mind. Thank You, Christian W. Chandler|Chris, Facebook, [[February 2012 Facebook Posts#Urgent news|February 18, 2012]]}}

In the following days, Chris posted her contact information in hopes that his friends would troll her. Thankfully, this effort was not successful.

[[File:Fbp10.png|thumb|Chris' retarded attempt at trolling back Megan. He exhibits a belief that if you simply dox people online, they get trolled back, not realizing the large number of reasons why this only happened to him.]]

On 4 April [[2013]], Chris denounced The GAMe PLACe and called for Megan to be "jailed and beaten up", describing her as a "vile, wicked, traitorous bitch,"<ref>[http://i.imgur.com/mBFcon9.png Leaked Facebook post]</ref> a rare display of hatred upon a woman not seen from Chris since [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. Judging by a 20 July 2013 Facebook post, Chris seems to be holding Schroeder, along with [[Michael Snyder|Snyder]], to be the main culprit behind the various misfortunes he had over the years.<ref>[[Facebook#Spring Brakers]]</ref> Perhaps, if Chris ever starts the [[Sonichu_(comic)|comic]] up again, we shall see Megan taking up the golden hair/helm of being Chris's foe.

=== Megagi La Scapegoat ===

Chris's vitriol for Megan continues almost six years after his ban from [[The GAMe PLACe]], and he has even resorted to using Megan as a scapegoat for everything bad that happens to him even if he is blatantly responsible. In the aftermath of a permaban from [[Wal-Mart]] on the weekend of 7 September 2013 for having vandalized an [[Xbox]] One display, Chris flew into an incoherent rage and began blaming Megan for both his Wal-mart and GAMe PLACe bans:

{{quote|If it had not been for Mr. "Manajerk", Megan Schroeder, and their Internet Troll/Cyber-Bully Breeding and Meeting Ground, Cville's Hobbies, Games and Toys, My Family and I would not have had go through all of the emotionally depressing, and Financial Downfall to [[Financhu Crisis|the depths of Greatly Poor and Just Getting By!]] The Manajerk has drained us financially, thinking we are freaking rich. And Megan has robbed me emotionally, started all of the Hate Against Me on the freaking Internet, Never financially paid me back for ALL of the material favors I bought for her off of eBay, and I WANT MY UNCUT "SAILOR MOON' DVDS FROM SEASONS "R" TO "SAILOR STAR" THAT GERMAN WARFARE BITCH CONNED FROM ME RETURNED TO ME!!!|Chris, Facebook, September 7, 2013}}

[[File:Sept13 Imgur 28.jpg|thumb|left|Megan's fate as a Lego voodoo doll. Notice her goth style clothing.]]
On 24 September 2013, Chris claimed in a Facebook post to have received an email from Daniel Mimms about Megan's current whereabouts. He now classes her with the Witch ([[Mary Lee Walsh]]) and the Bastard ([[Michael Snyder]]), and makes three [[Lego]] minifigs of them and shakes them together as a sort of punishment.<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Voodoo-Wise]]</ref><ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Yep, the Bitch has not changed a thing...]]</ref> Of course, the notion that Chris can perform [[Wikipedia:Sympathetic magic|sympathetic magic]] to harm his enemies is [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|befitting]] with his [[Chris and reality|other delusions]]. Chris would continue to use this Lego minifigure of Megan as a totem to relieve his anger for her, and it appeared a month later "in detention" at [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013|Lego Manchester High]].

On 3 October 2013, Chris posted another [[October 2013 Facebook Posts#Megagi La Skunk agrees that you should have never been born|rambling tirade directed at Megan]] to Facebook. This time, Chris claimed that [[Megagi La Skunk]], Megan's cartoon character that she probably doesn't even remember making, told him that she is "deeply distrustful" and agrees with Chris that Megan should have never been born. Additionally, as if she would even care, Megan's [[Sailor Megtune]] "powers" were "revoked" by Chris. On top of reiterating the previous "wrongdoings" by Megan, Chris has proven nothing at all, except perhaps that he suffers from [[Chris and reality|some form of]] [[Chris and anger|mental illness.]]

{{quote|
You ungrateful bitch. Quit hiding behind the Anons, Trolls, PLace People and every Damned Person who you have deceived into siding with you.

By the way, I have checked with Megagi La Skunk; she feels deep distrust in you. We mutually agree that you should have never been born, even if it meant she would never exist. Also, your Sailor Megtune powers; I created them for you; I have taken them away from you! Usagi and the Sailor Scouts would have been most ashamed of you.

...And by the way, I pray you have been having Really Bad Luck, Feeling Paranoid of EVERYONE, and Shakingly Stressed, because I continue to leave your minifigure upside-down and shaken with the Witch and the Bastard! And I have been feeling the very same grave emotions myself for the Six Long Years, you damn, dirty bitch!|Chris, Facebook, October 3, 2013}}

Chris ended his first rant with a comment reading "NOBODY ELSE COMMENT THIS POST!!!", possibly because he's tired of having his atrocious behavior called out by even the most ass-patting of his friends. The following day, Chris focused all his blame like a laser beam on Megan, insisting that she is responsible for the [[CWCki]], virtually all of his [[List of places that have banned Chris|bans]], the "theft" of his [[Sailor Moon]] DVDs ''yet again'', and astonishingly, even the fact that he lacks a sweetheart. That's right: not only is Megan the one who's responsible for everything Chris inflicted on himself, but also Chris will ''only'' forgive Megan after he gets [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|unpaid]] [[china]] he feels entitled to.

{{quote|I will only forgive Megan, and remove all curses upon her, when she apologizes to me In Person and Face To Face, when the Cwcki, its forum, and Everything Else Against me on the Freaking Internet is GONE, GONE, GONE, when I am NOT BANNED FROM ANYWHERE, when I get my original Uncut Sailor Moon DVDs returned to me, when my Good Name is Cleared of all of the bad, AND when I have my female Sweetheart for Forever. And I am Not Stepping Down beforehand.|Chris, Facebook, October 4, 2013, 10:09am}}

=== Megan, Queen of the Trolls ===

Roughly two hours later, Chris posted another Facebook message. While seemingly intending to explain the methodology of Megan's master [[troll]] scheme, to everyone else it actually reads more like valid condemnations of Chris' obnoxious behavior by his peers and authority figures. Finally, Chris re-iterated his desire not to hear any criticism from his friends, instructing others not to comment on his post and challenging Megan to a face-to-face meeting. Whether Megan cares enough to challenge, in-person, a delusional 31-year old who lives with his [[Barb|mother]] remains yet to be seen.

{{quote|Megan, I KNOW you and the PLace employee continuously conversed and conspired against me. "Christian is so weird. " "Tell me about it." "He hangs onto me, touching me, clinging onto my every word. Ugh." "I can not stand his shouting outbursts that echos in my head after both of those times he stressed out." "I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my mashed potato grenade could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed for murder." "I just want to ban him from "MY" store forever." "I got it! Let's get an embarrassing photo of him, post it online, and put him to shame forever!" "Mimms and Lucas are tech freaks! Let's enlist them." "Yeah! Chris will be banned from "YOUR" store based on the hyped up mal online reputation; he will be out of my life forever. Pending possible nightmares and night terrors to come, but who the fuck cares; his Autistic, Fragile mind will shatter along with his heart after I kiss my homosexual fake boyfriend in front of him!" ""HA HA HA HA HA AHA HA HA!!!!!""

I am onto your game that took away six years of my life and destroyed me; you either pay me what you owe, or I continue to curse and haunt you with my father at my side.|Chris, Facebook, October 4, 2013, 12:44pm}}

Chris later deleted the two posts prior to this one; a few hours later, he deleted this one as well.

==Years later==
{{quote|I just say let her, wherever she is, live her life, and I'll just stay here, liv- living mine. It's all done and over with.|Chris, finally moving on}}

On 26 January 2016, in the [[CatKnight Interview 2|second CatKnight interview]], Sir Arthur Spatchcock brought up the topic of Megan and the [[February 2012 Facebook Posts#Urgent news|grudge]] [[February_2012_Facebook_Posts#Pissed off|Chris]] [[February_2012_Facebook_Posts#Damn You|had]] [[February_2012_Facebook_Posts#Address|against]] [[October 2013 Facebook Posts#GAMe PLACe revelations|her]]. Chris claims that he has finally gotten over that grudge, wishing for her to be left alone to live her own life.

In February 2017, Chris looked up and browsed through Megan's Facebook account,<ref>[[February 2017 Facebook Posts#Found Megan's Facebook]]</ref> sharing one of her drawings to his own account. When asked by [[Kim Wilson]] if they were friends again, Chris responded:

{{quotebox|Not quite; I just gone through my past and recent sent friend requests, found Megan Schroeder, and I liked her cover photo; it's cute. She has a few cute dogs too. At least, she's doing okay; as far as I can tell.}}

The act of searching for his ex-[[gal pal]] came just four days after Chris posted about his feelings of nostalgia for his "friends" from [[Manchester High]].

In October 9th, 2017, Chris once again looked up Megan's Facebook for her online store and left a comment on it:<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_Facebook_posts#Complimenting_Megan_Schroeder</ref>

{{quotebox|I just wanted to tell you I like your craft and are. You have become a lot more talented over the years. Many blessing to you and your family. 🌸}}

The post was later removed.

On 19 May 2018, a full decade after Megan cut off all communications with him, Chris issued a public apology to Megan and her brother and expressed his desire to reopen old wounds by speaking with them:
<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/997900592084238336</ref>

{{quotebox|I want to once again humbly apologize to Megan and John Schroeder. I know I did y'all wrong back in the day but time heals all wounds. It would be nice to hear from you with just a simple "hi" or "best of luck". After all of These Years I still need closure.}}

When asked why he would issue this apology publicly when she clearly does not want to be associated with him, Chris responded that he had no choice because she blocked him on Facebook.
<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/997901813868257281</ref>

During the [[Idea Guy]] saga, Chris's belief in multiple dimensions was exploited and his sense of reality hijacked to make changes to many of Chris's characters, concepts and perspective of the real world, with him considering them to be valid. Ideas involving Megan include:

*Megan having the memories of [[Hyperdimension Neptunia|CPU Red Heart]], which she earned while in politics<ref>https://tweetsave.com/cwcsonichu/status/1015420612494397441</ref>.

==Gallery==

===Art by Megan===
<center><gallery>
Image:061-MegansSailorMoonCD.jpg|[[Sailor Moon]]
Image:313-MegansSMoon.jpg|Sailor Moon
Image:316-MegagiOriginal.jpg|[[Megagi La Skunk]] ~ The pose in this and the following few drawings are quite obviously traced from the same source.
Image:318-HoundHowl.jpg|Hound Howl, which Chris reused as "Canino the Houndhowl" in the [[Wedding Comic]].
Image:319-PendingDoom.jpg
Image:320-Apocolypse.jpg
Image:321-IceCune.jpg
Image:322-houdourstuff.jpg
Image:Megan_ace_of_clubs.JPG|"Ace of Clubs" ~ Megan's original design for [[Patti-chan]], until Chris stole the design.
Image:Megyoshimitsu1.jpg|[[wikipedia:Yoshimitsu|Yoshimitsu]] drawing, made in [[1990s|1996]].<ref name="tekken forces">[https://web.archive.org/web/20091012030656/http://www.tekkenforces.com/fanart/fanartgmegimitsu.php Tekken Forces Fanart Gallery]</ref>
Image:Megyoshimitsu2.jpg|''[[Wikipedia:The Powerpuff Girls|Powerpuff Girls]]''-style Yoshimitsu<ref name="tekken forces"/>
</gallery></center>

===Art of Megan===
<center><gallery>
Image:Sonichu07-P03.jpg
Image:Sonichu07-P04.jpg
Image:Sonichu07-P05.jpg|KINDA OF A [[Dragon Ball Z|GOKU-GET-EM]] ATTITUDE. :)
Image:129-ChrisChanMegtune.jpg
Image:305-ACMegan.jpg
Image:306-ACMeganBck.jpg
Image:307-MegSch.jpg
Image:311-RedDarkMeggician.jpg
Image:312-PeanutsMegan.jpg|Another [[wikipedia:Schroeder (Peanuts)|Schroeder]].
File:ModNation GalPal.jpg|He just can't let go...
File:Sept13 Imgur 28.jpg|[[LEGO]] voodoo doll of Megan.
File:Lego2 - 24 September 2013.jpeg|He keeps it upside down to torture her.
File:Lego3 - 24 September 2013.jpeg|When he feels REALLY angry, he shakes it.
File:Meganfight 26.jpg|Chris victorious over the evil bitch.

</gallery></center>

===Miscellaneous===
<center><gallery>
Image:323-MegansDarkChao.JPG
</gallery></center>

==References==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Megan Schroeder}}
<references />

{{-}}
{{MeganSaga}}
{{People}}
{{Love quest}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Schroeder, Megan}}
[[Category:Gal pals]]
[[Category:The GAMe PLACe]]
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]
[[Category:Megan Saga|*]]

Megan Schroeder

2018-08-03T06:44:26Z

MindHit: /* Aftermath */

{{DeadLinks}}


{{Articleofthenow}}
{{quote|Ah, For Her I Would travel even A Thousand Miles, just to be with her. Fortunately, she lives only about one hour from my house, and I meet her once a week at a closer-to-home social. This feeling, It was, and still is, so pure and true, it was like as if I was Born to Love Her. When She Smiles, I feel like I'm Walking on Sunshine as I give my replying smile and gaze into her eyes. And her hair is the softest and most warm-tingling. Cloud Nine? I feel like I'm on Ten.|Christian, ''[[Story of My Current Days]]''}}
{{Quote|ED didn't drag my name through the mud but you did.
I don't know, I can't keep disgracing myself and forgiving and forgiving. I have some pride you know. I've forgiven you so many times before it's just getting irritating now. Even I have my limits.|Megan gives her own view<ref>[[Megan emails, 2008]]</ref>}}

{{infobox
| title = Megan Schroeder
| image = [[Image:ChrisAndMeganUnpixelated.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Name
|data1 = Megan Schroeder
|label3 = Date of Birth
|data3 = 23 July 1986 (age {{Age|1986|7|23}})
|label4 = Gender
|data4 = Female
|label5 = Nationality
|data5 = [[United States|American]]
|label6 = [[Chris and race|Race]]
|data6 = White
}}

'''Megan Schroeder''' (born 23 July [[1986]]) is a former [[gal pal]] of [[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s, with whom he had perhaps the closest relationship with anybody he's ever had in his life.

Chris first met Megan in the summer of [[2004]] at [[The GAMe PLACe]]. Following Chris's progressively creepier unwanted advances, she cut off contact with him in early [[2008]]. Since then, Chris has developed an intense and unwarranted [[Chris and anger|grudge]] against her, thanks to misconceptions fed to him by [[Borb]], and his [[autism|autistic delusions]] about her scheming with [[Michael Snyder]] to have him banned from The GAMe PLACe. Chris's attempted contacts with Megan have dragged on as late as [[2018]].

==Timeline==
[[Image:Megan_Timeline_Prototype.png|1000px|center]]

==Prologue==
{{main|Megan Emails, 2005-2006}}
{{See also|Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007}}
[[Image:156-CWCMegan1.jpg|thumb|Look at the fear in her eyes...]]

{{quote|During the late summer months, I picked up and started the [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] [[Trading Card Game]] (it was around the time the movie came into theaters). One Saturday at the Game Place (Where I was also going for Pokemon TCG on Fridays), I met Megan and [[John's Custom Gundam|John Schroeder]]. At first I thought they were a couple but then they were just Sister and Brother. Over the months of getting to know Megan, I grew fond of her. Although at that time, and up to now, she wasn't interested in a lovely relationship. I've bided to her wishes and requests. I am truly fond of her, and I hope she will have a change of heart soon. She'll be turning 21 on July 23, 2007.|Christian<ref>[[Yep, I'm on TV :)]]</ref>}}

Megan is a typical ''truly'' [[boyfriend-free girl]], even claiming to be [[Chris_and_sexuality#Asexuality|asexual]]. She had a few eccentricities, which Chris was more than happy to copy and oblige, namely her fondness for ''[[My Little Pony]]'', ''[[Sailor Moon]]'', and using Chris like a debit card because she was too lazy to go on [[eBay]] herself.

Megan and Chris first met at The GAMe PLACe in summer 2004, over a game of ''Yu-Gi-Oh!''. The two apparently struck up a friendship of sorts. They had an obvious connection from the start, since they were both idling their twenties away playing [[card games]] marketed to preteens. It only took [[Third date|a few games]] and a handful of e-mails before Chris saw Megan as his [[sweetheart]]. Megan, however, did not reciprocate this sentiment. It probably didn't help that Megan was getting Chris to buy things for her like a stereotypical wife nagging her husband:

{{quote|Please can you get this video for me? please hurry! thanks!|Megan, [[Megan_Emails,_2005-2006#Megan_wants_a_Tin_Tin_episode|Megan E-mails]]}}

Through the end of 2005 and into [[2006]], Chris would obsess over Megan, writing her [[Sonichu 5|into his comic]], trying to drag her into dates, trying to snuggle, hold her hand, kiss her, and other attempted romantic gestures. This didn't accomplish anything but rousing the ire of Megan, who was uncomfortable with these advances and only saw him as a friend, nothing more. She repeatedly tried to assert her asexuality to Chris, in an effort to prevent his advances. Sadly, this fell on deaf ears, and Chris would continue to hound her. Even when Megan eventually resorted to claiming she had a boyfriend, Chris was not deterred.

Unfortunately for her, this was only the beginning...

==Megan Saga==

===Sailor Megtune===
{{Main|Sailor Megtune}}

Megan, like Chris, enjoyed drawing cartoons, and this seems to have caught Chris's eye early in the game:

{{quote|Everytime I see your drawings, I get inspired to want to work more on [[Sonichu (comic)|my comics]].|Christian, [[Megan_Emails,_2005-2006#Chris_wants_to_date_Megan_at_McDonald.27s|Megan E-mails]]}}

In what was a fortunate alignment of his ass-kissing campaign with the series of diary entries that ''Sonichu'' had become, Megan (later [[retconned]] as '''Meg-chan''') soon made her first appearance as [[Sailor Megtune]] in [[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]] along with [[Megagi La Skunk]], her own furry sidekick. The two are purportedly "[[Sailor Moon|Sailor Soldiers]]" and reveal on the spot that Chris is an old friend of theirs (including Megagi) and thwart the evil Jerkops trying to ruin Chris' [[Love Quest]] with Rockin' Hurricane, causing Magic Rocket to [[Team Rocket|blast off again]]. Her influence on the "art" of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' is apparent in Chris's sudden transition to a more [[anime]] style with ''Sonichu'' #5, most notably in his character's eyes, which became large and shiny.

[[Image:SchuComic6Page50a.jpg|thumb|Getting dangerously close to crossing the line...]]

Megan and Chris appeared to chat about comics in their e-mail conversations; Chris [[Ego|critiqued]] some of her story ideas, and ran the plotline for [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]] by her, including a bizarre offer to write in Megan's own imaginary daughter. While Megan probably found the whole thing harmlessly eccentric at first, ''Sonichu'' #5 managed to create some drama pretty quickly upon its release. Megan undoubtedly flipped when she saw her character getting romantic with Chris, as well as being portrayed in a sexualized manner. Chris completely failed to comprehend why she was angry, but did [[retcon]] a couple of pages to tone them down. This did not placate Megan, however.

===Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown===
{{main|Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown}}
{{See also|Megan Emails, Aug-Dec 2007}}

{{quote|In any case, I LOATHE [[Adam Stackhouse|Adam]] and his Sister for STEALING my one chance at taking my Sweet [[Gal pal|Gal-Friend]] to [[Wikipedia:Seattle|Seattle]]; [[Chris and rape|it would have been terriffic]]. I might have even been able to change her outlook on not planning on having children (she and I are both virgins; although I am a [[stress|FRUSTRATED]], High-Functionally [[autism|AUTISTIC]], 25-YEAR OLD [[Virgin with rage|VIRGIN]].|[[PSN Blogs]]}}

In June [[2007]], Megan went to [[Wikipedia:Kentucky|Kentucky]]. Undeterred, Chris continued e-mailing her, refusing to back away even for a moment as he ''still'' believed that, deep down inside, Megan truly did love him. Discovering Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown and the prizes for victory, Chris eagerly entered the contest, hoping to win a [[PSP]] and use the trip offered in the contest to win her [[china|heart]]. In the end, as expected, Chris lost (even after extensive cheating), [[Adam Stackhouse]] won, and Megan didn't care. Even when Chris began whining to her and others about how Adam and everyone else except Chris had somehow cheated, Megan didn't care either way. This childish behavior eventually resulted in Megan losing her temper with Chris, reprimanding him for his selfishness and inappropriate behavior. Despite being hurt by her outburst, Chris continued to harass Megan in much the same way as before.

===Rule 34 and The End of Megan===
{{Main|ShecameforCWC.JPG}}
{{See also|Megan emails, 2008}}

{{quote|And, by the way, that is not ''Crystal'' whose eyes are censored; that is ''Megan''!|Chris stating [[Chris and art|the not-so-obvious]]<ref name="secondmessage">[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref>}}

In November 2007, Chris would discover his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page and begin his one-man crusade [[Sonichu 8|against the garbage]]. In the process, he uploaded a number of [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|pornographic and lewd]] artworks, one of which was [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|a picture of him fingering Megan]] with her eyes obscured. Trolls originally believed that she was [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|his imaginary sister Crystal]], which prompted an outraged Chris to try to deny accusations of incestuous desires by revealing that the image was actually meant to represent Megan.<ref>[[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica#March 2008|Chris confirms Megan's identity on 18 March 2008.]]</ref><ref name="secondmessage"/>

By 12 [[March 2008]], Megan discovered the picture depicting her and demanded that it be removed immediately. Chris attempted to do so, but found himself blocked at every turn. His edits were quickly reverted, or even worse, compounded, as he tried to upload other versions of the picture with the face cropped out or obscured. On 21 [[April 2008]] Megan wrote an email to Chris saying she was not comfortable being around him anymore,<ref>[[Megan emails, 2008#Megan can't trust Chris anymore]]</ref> thus putting an end to their friendship.

Throughout the fiasco, Chris brashly attempted to paint himself as a greater victim than Megan, initially even assuming that she didn't understand what was going on in the picture. He would later admit he did it in part to suppress '''the occasional impulse to [[rape]] her''', and that trying to assert that what she was going through just BEING in the picture and learning what he could have done was ''nothing'' compared to the misery of the [[troll]]ing he was enduring.<ref>[[Megan_Emails,_2008#Chris_continues_bothering_her_about_ED]]</ref>

Evidence suggests that Megan was distancing herself from Chris even before she discovered the awful drawing. Comments by former GAMe PLACe patrons Daniel Mimms and [[Lucas]] indicate that Megan was already avoiding Chris before she found out ShecameforCWC.<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Initial post|Mimms and Lucas Q&A]]: "Megan would usually stand/hide behind me and Lucas to avoid [Chris], '''especially after''' the drawings of her got leaked [emphasis added]." This comment suggests that Megan was avoiding Chris before ShecameforCWC came to her attention. In their [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Chris and Megan|discussion of Megan]], Mimms and Lucas seem to attribute Chris's groping as the main factor behind the deterioration of his relationship with her, while giving little weight to ShecameforCWC.</ref> Chris himself has partially confirmed this account on the [[CWCipedia]].<ref>[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Megan+Schroeder Megan]: "When I started getting too close, [Megan] started to feel uncomfortable, My Bad. Then she distanced herself from me, saw other dudes, including a possible homosexual."</ref> It might very well be that ShecameforCWC was the last step in euthanizing a dying relationship, rather than killing a vibrant and living one.

==Aftermath==
{{quote|Too bad I was never just that too all into him.|Cartoon Megan, "I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC"}}

{{quote|Megan... WHY?!|Christian,
"I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC"}}

Despite Megan telling him she was no longer comfortable being in his presence, Chris was not willing to give up on her. On 11 [[2008#June|June 2008]], Chris sent an email to a person named Tyler Wane, asking Tyler to deliver Megan the birthday gift Chris bought for her (a German-English dictionary). Chris said he could not deliver her the gift himself due to being "forced into hiatus from the Pokemon League by that S.O.B. [[Michael Snyder|Mike]]". Tyler in response suggested to Chris to arrange meeting with Megan outside [[The GAMe PLACe]].<ref><[[Chris emails 2008#June]]</ref>

Megan surfaced again in Chris's thoughts in [[July 2009]], first in the [[CWC "Boyfriend"]] video, and then in the subsequent update, [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC]]. Chris also [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCo72hJ-SAg reposted] the Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown entry, though this version is slightly different from the ones frequently seen in latter days: After "...my friend Megan!", Chris inserted a short break with a photo of him and Megan, with a lovely heart frame. Either this is the original version before Chris tried to clean up his image, or a brand new version with new improved references to the long-lost love.

On 26 [[March 2009]], he released a [[CWC Major Update 26 March 2009 |Captain's Log]] where he told everyone to [[Chris and Hypocrisy|"leave her alone"]] because she was going through [[stress]] from the [[trolls]], and threatened to stop drawing the comic if they didn't. At the beginning of the video Chris claims that he was recently contacted by Megan, though it was most likely a troll posing as her seeing as she had cut off all ties with him.

On 12 [[August 2009]], he dedicated a song to Megan in one of his [[KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special]] videos, where the first sign that he'd convinced himself that she'd told him "I Love You" comes up (and he remains relatively consistent when speaking of her in acting as though this actually happened).

{{quote|Coming up next at #7, we got another long-distance dedication, to the old [[gal-pal]] of mine that I almost had a ra- I had meant to be- I had her "I love you" before I got kicked out, Megan Schroeder, her, from her favorite, this is from her favorite h-artist, Yngwie Malmsteen.|Christian, "[[KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special]]"}}

In 2010, he created a [[:File:ModNation GalPal.jpg|model of Megan]] for ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' (named "Gal Pal"), showing that he still couldn't let go.

=== Chris's version of events ===
On 16 [[May 2010]], the [[CWCipedia]]'s new fan manager Daria Camacho created a page for Megan, using the link on Chris's page of [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|gal-pals and sweethearts]]. When Chris discovered it, he erased all of Daria's text and wrote his own version. The abridged version of events he presents is much shorter than his gigantic [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia page)|rant on The Wallflower]], probably because the events of the Megan Saga are beginning to fade from his memory.

{{quotebox|If you REALLY MUST KNOW...

Megan and I first met at a Yu-Gi-Oh Tournament at The G&H Place, back when it was still in the Downtown Mall. It was around the time the Y.G.O. Movie debuted in theaters. She and I, we talked, hung out and became really good friends.

"I DID have lovey-dovey feelings for her, and I still care about her as a friend. I did her a number of favors by getting her this and that off of eBay, then she would reimburse me the cost of each item.

When I started getting too close, she started to feel uncomfortable, My Bad. Then she distanced herself from me, saw other dudes, including a possible [[homos]]exual.

I drew that drawing of her and me that is unfortunately popular among everyone who tends to haze me for TWO REASONS. Firstly, because of My Own Wishful Thinking. And second a tool in a lame attempt to overcrowd the E.D. page against me with Bu**C*** with my own "information" to shut it down.

Ever since, she totally spaced herself from me, like as if she had put a restraining order against, which she did not. And as I was being forced off the Place premesis the last day I was there, she stood by and watched in shock. She could have spoken up for me, but she did not.

I have lost communication with Megan since then.}}

In the months and years after his "breakup" with Megan, Chris came to try and act as if he'd gotten over her. His [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia page)|CWCipedia page]] on [[The Wallflower]], for instance, claimed "I had LOOOOOONG moved on from Megan."

However, a lingering attachment betrayed itself on occasion. The archive of his [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|female acquaintances]] on the CWCipedia noted, "I still miss her sometimes." In an [[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2#Chris_lies_about_The_Game_Place|e-mail to Jackie]] from April 2010, when he recounted having his picture taken at The GAMe PLACe, Chris said, "I was in a state of shock from seeing Megan and (her short-lived romance) Christopher MAKING OUT. '''That Should Have Been Me.'''"

==The Blame Game==

=== Origins ===
[[File:Megan Schroeder - 2013 September.jpeg|thumb|Megan, years later, still recovering from her ordeal. Out of frame: JERK.]]
The [[Matthew Noble call]] of August 2010 revealed that [[Bob]] and [[Barbara]] disliked and distrusted Megan, believing that she conspired with Michael Snyder and "some [[homos]]exual[s]" to get Chris banned from The GAMe PLACe. Barbara also mentions how Megan "lied" about something, suggesting that she believes Megan to be a troll.

It is possible that this belief originated with Chris, as in his correspondence with [[Katie Bay]], he lists Megan as a "possible troll".<ref>[[Katie_Bay_E-mails_2#26 July]]</ref> His reasoning was typical Chris - she had a vagina and didn't want to give him access to it. He also appears to have [[Autism|confused her with another white female brunette]] that placed a sign on his lawn on [[Halloween]] [[2008]].

=== Chris Doxes Megan ===

A series of leaked Facebook postings beginning in [[February 2012]] revealed Chris' ever-growing, pathological, and extreme hatred for Megan. His animosity for Megan supposedly grew much more vitriolic after buying into his parents' [[Chris and reality|completely baseless]] belief that Megan was responsible for the "Hate and Smear Campaign" against Chris:

{{quote|EVERYONE, I have most urgent news. It is Final in My Mind, and from my mother as an eye and ear witness of her consorting with [[Michael Snyder]] LONG Before Novembef, [[2007]]; Megan Schroeder IS the SEED of the Whole Hate and Smear Campaign Against Me on the [[Internet]]. If any of you all Know where she is, or have clues of her, or her brother...current wherabouts, Please Inform Me on THIS WALL, Posthaste. She is Needed Brought to me, my mother and [[Rob Bell|our attorney]], for Great Questioning, and a Huge Piece of my mind. Thank You, Christian W. Chandler|Chris, Facebook, [[February 2012 Facebook Posts#Urgent news|February 18, 2012]]}}

In the following days, Chris posted her contact information in hopes that his friends would troll her. Thankfully, this effort was not successful.

[[File:Fbp10.png|thumb|Chris' retarded attempt at trolling back Megan. He exhibits a belief that if you simply dox people online, they get trolled back, not realizing the large number of reasons why this only happened to him.]]

On 4 April [[2013]], Chris denounced The GAMe PLACe and called for Megan to be "jailed and beaten up", describing her as a "vile, wicked, traitorous bitch,"<ref>[http://i.imgur.com/mBFcon9.png Leaked Facebook post]</ref> a rare display of hatred upon a woman not seen from Chris since [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. Judging by a 20 July 2013 Facebook post, Chris seems to be holding Schroeder, along with [[Michael Snyder|Snyder]], to be the main culprit behind the various misfortunes he had over the years.<ref>[[Facebook#Spring Brakers]]</ref> Perhaps, if Chris ever starts the [[Sonichu_(comic)|comic]] up again, we shall see Megan taking up the golden hair/helm of being Chris's foe.

=== Megagi La Scapegoat ===

Chris's vitriol for Megan continues almost six years after his ban from [[The GAMe PLACe]], and he has even resorted to using Megan as a scapegoat for everything bad that happens to him even if he is blatantly responsible. In the aftermath of a permaban from [[Wal-Mart]] on the weekend of 7 September 2013 for having vandalized an [[Xbox]] One display, Chris flew into an incoherent rage and began blaming Megan for both his Wal-mart and GAMe PLACe bans:

{{quote|If it had not been for Mr. "Manajerk", Megan Schroeder, and their Internet Troll/Cyber-Bully Breeding and Meeting Ground, Cville's Hobbies, Games and Toys, My Family and I would not have had go through all of the emotionally depressing, and Financial Downfall to the depths of Greatly Poor and Just Getting By! The Manajerk has drained us financially, thinking we are freaking rich. And Megan has robbed me emotionally, started all of the Hate Against Me on the freaking Internet, Never financially paid me back for ALL of the material favors I bought for her off of eBay, and I WANT MY UNCUT "SAILOR MOON' DVDS FROM SEASONS "R" TO "SAILOR STAR" THAT GERMAN WARFARE BITCH CONNED FROM ME RETURNED TO ME!!!|Chris, Facebook, September 7, 2013}}

[[File:Sept13 Imgur 28.jpg|thumb|left|Megan's fate as a Lego voodoo doll. Notice her goth style clothing.]]
On 24 September 2013, Chris claimed in a Facebook post to have received an email from Daniel Mimms about Megan's current whereabouts. He now classes her with the Witch ([[Mary Lee Walsh]]) and the Bastard ([[Michael Snyder]]), and makes three [[Lego]] minifigs of them and shakes them together as a sort of punishment.<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Voodoo-Wise]]</ref><ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Yep, the Bitch has not changed a thing...]]</ref> Of course, the notion that Chris can perform [[Wikipedia:Sympathetic magic|sympathetic magic]] to harm his enemies is [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|befitting]] with his [[Chris and reality|other delusions]]. Chris would continue to use this Lego minifigure of Megan as a totem to relieve his anger for her, and it appeared a month later "in detention" at [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013|Lego Manchester High]].

On 3 October 2013, Chris posted another [[October 2013 Facebook Posts#Megagi La Skunk agrees that you should have never been born|rambling tirade directed at Megan]] to Facebook. This time, Chris claimed that [[Megagi La Skunk]], Megan's cartoon character that she probably doesn't even remember making, told him that she is "deeply distrustful" and agrees with Chris that Megan should have never been born. Additionally, as if she would even care, Megan's [[Sailor Megtune]] "powers" were "revoked" by Chris. On top of reiterating the previous "wrongdoings" by Megan, Chris has proven nothing at all, except perhaps that he suffers from [[Chris and reality|some form of]] [[Chris and anger|mental illness.]]

{{quote|
You ungrateful bitch. Quit hiding behind the Anons, Trolls, PLace People and every Damned Person who you have deceived into siding with you.

By the way, I have checked with Megagi La Skunk; she feels deep distrust in you. We mutually agree that you should have never been born, even if it meant she would never exist. Also, your Sailor Megtune powers; I created them for you; I have taken them away from you! Usagi and the Sailor Scouts would have been most ashamed of you.

...And by the way, I pray you have been having Really Bad Luck, Feeling Paranoid of EVERYONE, and Shakingly Stressed, because I continue to leave your minifigure upside-down and shaken with the Witch and the Bastard! And I have been feeling the very same grave emotions myself for the Six Long Years, you damn, dirty bitch!|Chris, Facebook, October 3, 2013}}

Chris ended his first rant with a comment reading "NOBODY ELSE COMMENT THIS POST!!!", possibly because he's tired of having his atrocious behavior called out by even the most ass-patting of his friends. The following day, Chris focused all his blame like a laser beam on Megan, insisting that she is responsible for the [[CWCki]], virtually all of his [[List of places that have banned Chris|bans]], the "theft" of his [[Sailor Moon]] DVDs ''yet again'', and astonishingly, even the fact that he lacks a sweetheart. That's right: not only is Megan the one who's responsible for everything Chris inflicted on himself, but also Chris will ''only'' forgive Megan after he gets [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|unpaid]] [[china]] he feels entitled to.

{{quote|I will only forgive Megan, and remove all curses upon her, when she apologizes to me In Person and Face To Face, when the Cwcki, its forum, and Everything Else Against me on the Freaking Internet is GONE, GONE, GONE, when I am NOT BANNED FROM ANYWHERE, when I get my original Uncut Sailor Moon DVDs returned to me, when my Good Name is Cleared of all of the bad, AND when I have my female Sweetheart for Forever. And I am Not Stepping Down beforehand.|Chris, Facebook, October 4, 2013, 10:09am}}

=== Megan, Queen of the Trolls ===

Roughly two hours later, Chris posted another Facebook message. While seemingly intending to explain the methodology of Megan's master [[troll]] scheme, to everyone else it actually reads more like valid condemnations of Chris' obnoxious behavior by his peers and authority figures. Finally, Chris re-iterated his desire not to hear any criticism from his friends, instructing others not to comment on his post and challenging Megan to a face-to-face meeting. Whether Megan cares enough to challenge, in-person, a delusional 31-year old who lives with his [[Barb|mother]] remains yet to be seen.

{{quote|Megan, I KNOW you and the PLace employee continuously conversed and conspired against me. "Christian is so weird. " "Tell me about it." "He hangs onto me, touching me, clinging onto my every word. Ugh." "I can not stand his shouting outbursts that echos in my head after both of those times he stressed out." "I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my mashed potato grenade could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed for murder." "I just want to ban him from "MY" store forever." "I got it! Let's get an embarrassing photo of him, post it online, and put him to shame forever!" "Mimms and Lucas are tech freaks! Let's enlist them." "Yeah! Chris will be banned from "YOUR" store based on the hyped up mal online reputation; he will be out of my life forever. Pending possible nightmares and night terrors to come, but who the fuck cares; his Autistic, Fragile mind will shatter along with his heart after I kiss my homosexual fake boyfriend in front of him!" ""HA HA HA HA HA AHA HA HA!!!!!""

I am onto your game that took away six years of my life and destroyed me; you either pay me what you owe, or I continue to curse and haunt you with my father at my side.|Chris, Facebook, October 4, 2013, 12:44pm}}

Chris later deleted the two posts prior to this one; a few hours later, he deleted this one as well.

==Years later==
{{quote|I just say let her, wherever she is, live her life, and I'll just stay here, liv- living mine. It's all done and over with.|Chris, finally moving on}}

On 26 January 2016, in the [[CatKnight Interview 2|second CatKnight interview]], Sir Arthur Spatchcock brought up the topic of Megan and the [[February 2012 Facebook Posts#Urgent news|grudge]] [[February_2012_Facebook_Posts#Pissed off|Chris]] [[February_2012_Facebook_Posts#Damn You|had]] [[February_2012_Facebook_Posts#Address|against]] [[October 2013 Facebook Posts#GAMe PLACe revelations|her]]. Chris claims that he has finally gotten over that grudge, wishing for her to be left alone to live her own life.

In February 2017, Chris looked up and browsed through Megan's Facebook account,<ref>[[February 2017 Facebook Posts#Found Megan's Facebook]]</ref> sharing one of her drawings to his own account. When asked by [[Kim Wilson]] if they were friends again, Chris responded:

{{quotebox|Not quite; I just gone through my past and recent sent friend requests, found Megan Schroeder, and I liked her cover photo; it's cute. She has a few cute dogs too. At least, she's doing okay; as far as I can tell.}}

The act of searching for his ex-[[gal pal]] came just four days after Chris posted about his feelings of nostalgia for his "friends" from [[Manchester High]].

In October 9th, 2017, Chris once again looked up Megan's Facebook for her online store and left a comment on it:<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_Facebook_posts#Complimenting_Megan_Schroeder</ref>

{{quotebox|I just wanted to tell you I like your craft and are. You have become a lot more talented over the years. Many blessing to you and your family. 🌸}}

The post was later removed.

On 19 May 2018, a full decade after Megan cut off all communications with him, Chris issued a public apology to Megan and her brother and expressed his desire to reopen old wounds by speaking with them:
<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/997900592084238336</ref>

{{quotebox|I want to once again humbly apologize to Megan and John Schroeder. I know I did y'all wrong back in the day but time heals all wounds. It would be nice to hear from you with just a simple "hi" or "best of luck". After all of These Years I still need closure.}}

When asked why he would issue this apology publicly when she clearly does not want to be associated with him, Chris responded that he had no choice because she blocked him on Facebook.
<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/997901813868257281</ref>

During the [[Idea Guy]] saga, Chris's belief in multiple dimensions was exploited and his sense of reality hijacked to make changes to many of Chris's characters, concepts and perspective of the real world, with him considering them to be valid. Ideas involving Megan include:

*Megan having the memories of [[Hyperdimension Neptunia|CPU Red Heart]], which she earned while in politics<ref>https://tweetsave.com/cwcsonichu/status/1015420612494397441</ref>.

==Gallery==

===Art by Megan===
<center><gallery>
Image:061-MegansSailorMoonCD.jpg|[[Sailor Moon]]
Image:313-MegansSMoon.jpg|Sailor Moon
Image:316-MegagiOriginal.jpg|[[Megagi La Skunk]] ~ The pose in this and the following few drawings are quite obviously traced from the same source.
Image:318-HoundHowl.jpg|Hound Howl, which Chris reused as "Canino the Houndhowl" in the [[Wedding Comic]].
Image:319-PendingDoom.jpg
Image:320-Apocolypse.jpg
Image:321-IceCune.jpg
Image:322-houdourstuff.jpg
Image:Megan_ace_of_clubs.JPG|"Ace of Clubs" ~ Megan's original design for [[Patti-chan]], until Chris stole the design.
Image:Megyoshimitsu1.jpg|[[wikipedia:Yoshimitsu|Yoshimitsu]] drawing, made in [[1990s|1996]].<ref name="tekken forces">[https://web.archive.org/web/20091012030656/http://www.tekkenforces.com/fanart/fanartgmegimitsu.php Tekken Forces Fanart Gallery]</ref>
Image:Megyoshimitsu2.jpg|''[[Wikipedia:The Powerpuff Girls|Powerpuff Girls]]''-style Yoshimitsu<ref name="tekken forces"/>
</gallery></center>

===Art of Megan===
<center><gallery>
Image:Sonichu07-P03.jpg
Image:Sonichu07-P04.jpg
Image:Sonichu07-P05.jpg|KINDA OF A [[Dragon Ball Z|GOKU-GET-EM]] ATTITUDE. :)
Image:129-ChrisChanMegtune.jpg
Image:305-ACMegan.jpg
Image:306-ACMeganBck.jpg
Image:307-MegSch.jpg
Image:311-RedDarkMeggician.jpg
Image:312-PeanutsMegan.jpg|Another [[wikipedia:Schroeder (Peanuts)|Schroeder]].
File:ModNation GalPal.jpg|He just can't let go...
File:Sept13 Imgur 28.jpg|[[LEGO]] voodoo doll of Megan.
File:Lego2 - 24 September 2013.jpeg|He keeps it upside down to torture her.
File:Lego3 - 24 September 2013.jpeg|When he feels REALLY angry, he shakes it.
File:Meganfight 26.jpg|Chris victorious over the evil bitch.

</gallery></center>

===Miscellaneous===
<center><gallery>
Image:323-MegansDarkChao.JPG
</gallery></center>

==References==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Megan Schroeder}}
<references />

{{-}}
{{MeganSaga}}
{{People}}
{{Love quest}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Schroeder, Megan}}
[[Category:Gal pals]]
[[Category:The GAMe PLACe]]
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]
[[Category:Megan Saga|*]]

Aspergers (CWCipedia article)

2018-07-25T22:15:53Z

MindHit:

[[Image:Autisticrace.jpg|thumb|"Der Sieg über Autismus gehört allein uns, den echten autistischen Menschen!"]]

On 4 [[December 2009]], Chris uploaded a screed about '''Asperger's syndrome''' to his [[CWCipedia]]. Similar to his irrational hatred for [[Sonic Boom Protests|blue-colored arms]], Chris's distaste for [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger's]] is based not on reason but on his misconception that it is somehow competing with his precious crutch of autism. Chris has established an unwavering [[Chris and brand loyalty#Autism_vs._Asperger.27s|brand loyalty]], and he'll be damned if he gives any ground to this diabolical "competitor." It would be shocking, if not for the fact that this is typical [[Christian Weston Chandler]].

Chris has long suggested that somehow his form of [[autism]] is more special and worthy of pity than the forms of autism other people have. He'd never really given much of a reason as to [[Chris and his ego|why he felt this way]], though he started getting pressed heavily on the subject in several letters he received through his [[mailbag]]. When trying to explain why autism is completely different than Asperger's syndrome, he would cite sources that actually went against his suppositions.
When people pointed that out, he finally decided to vomit a hateful essay all over his site that suggested, among other things, that he [[Chris and Reality|"Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People"]], and that he was [[Slow-in-the-minds|one of the most successful autistic people of all time]], that those afflicted with Asperger's syndrome are [[CChanSonichuCWC|"impostors"]] that are hogging the "limelight" from [[Kick the Autistic|autistics]].

He also acts as if the fact that the name can sound like "ass-burgers" or "ass-boogers" ("Most Terrible Cut of Meat from any Animal; even something that can be picked nasally") is more proof that the classification of Asperger's as a type of autism is flawed (as if poor Hans's last name, which likely came from ''Asperge'', a Central European word for "asparagus," were his fault). Chris misses the irony that ass meat is exactly what he eats every time he drives to [[McDonald's]].

Long story short, he's merely crying that he thinks that people with Asperger's receive positive care and attention [[Chris and his Ego|he feels he should be receiving instead]].

==Article==

'''Christian Weston Chandler's Opinion on the Autisim/Aspergers Comparison.'''

December 4, 2009

Good day, I, Christian Weston Chandler, of sound [[Chris and psychology|mind]] and [[Chris and health|body]], type the following from [[TRUE and HONEST|honest]] personal opinions, and I [[Chris and remorse|apologize for all offensive remarks]] I will be making in the statement.

Aspergers is Nothing At All Like Autism. I have stated this Fact over and over again in my replies to messages from people who tell me otherwise. I feel very sick and tired of hearing that false rumor that the two are Anything to Full Similar.

Firstly, I can verify that I was diagnosed with Autism with papers in my parents' filing cabinets. And more current and immediate within my reach, I have the papers from my [[Autism papers|most recent Psychiatric Evaluation]] on November 5, [[2004]] with '''Dr. Zachariah C. Dameron, III, M.D.''' She reverifies my Autisim in this, and I quote, "Mr. Chandler is a 22-year-old man with a history of developmental delays and '''autism'''. Despite these limitations, he semms to have been quite successful in maximizing his academic abilities. Despite his significant delays in language, he has over the years developed relatively affective communication skills."

And with that, I have not only Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People, but I have gone beyond the Autistic Dreams academically, communicatively and socially. Still, I have trouble maintaining Eye-Contact, my mentality is sometimes slow yet quick at other times. The people who first evaluated me ever even stated that I would never even make it to [[Manchester High School|High School]], much less even '''Write His Name'''. Take That and Smoke It, oldest doctors. I have worked very hard to achieve and maintain [[Honor Roll]] throughout Middle and High School, and even to make the [[PVCC]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|Dean's List]], and fulfill my parents' wishes to work for and earn the [[CADD|Degree and Certificate for Computer Aided Drafting and Design]].

And those with Aspergers DARE try to take the Shine and Limelight AWAY from us Autistic people, not only with their "Social Flaws" and such possibly similar traits to Autism. But to SHUN us Autistics by being BETTER Communicatively and Mentally than us. I have received a message from one who DARED called me "Normal" in comparison to him. IF ANYTHING, the Asperger people ARE and HAVE BEEN NORMAL. They think they can one-up, or even match, autism with the Lack of Social Capability and their Clumsiness and such. THOSE Characteristics can be FAKED by them who are MOST NORMAL compared to us TRUE AUTISTIC PEOPLE.

Even their Title is flawed, "Aspergers"; it can be misconstrued into a Most Terrible Cut of Meat from any Animal; even something that can be picked nasally.

I have fought Long and Hard to [[Autism#Chris_and_other_autistics|make a Stand for the Autistic People]]; I will most certainly NOT let these impostors Steal the True Original Title of Autistic from any of us.

VICTORY OVER AUTISM BELONGS ONLY TO US TRUE AUTISTIC PEOPLE.

--ChrisChanSonichu 04:16, 5 December 2009 (CET)

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Aspergers}}

* [[Slow-in-the-minds]]
* [[Autism]]
* [[Chris and his Ego]]
* [[Chris and psychology]]
* [[Mailbag]]
* [[Asperger syndrome]]
[[Category:CWCipedia]]
[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Mailbag]]
[[Category:Pages with HONEST Content]]
[[Category:Autistic Spectrum Disorders]]

PlayStation 4

2018-07-25T17:41:13Z

MindHit:

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Taxpayermoney}}

The '''PlayStation 4''' is a [[video game]] console created by [[Sony]], originally released in North America on 15 [[November 2013]]. It is the best selling console of [[Wikipedia:History of video game consoles (eighth generation)|the eighth generation of gaming]], alongside the [[HEXbox|HEXbox One]] (with the [[Nintendo|Wii U]] trailing behind in sales but never falling off the market share). At least 80.59 million consoles have been sold by [[June 2018]].<ref>http://www.vgchartz.com/analysis/platform_totals/</ref>

Despite his fanaticism for [[PlayStation 3|the system's predecessor]] (and his [[Chris and money|tendency to spend hundreds of dollars on games for it]]), for two years following its release Chris made no indication of wanting to buy the life upgrade upgrade. This was most likely due to his [[Chris and health|family's health problems]] (compounded by his [[28 October 2011|run-in with the law]]) draining him of funds - as evidenced by him [[May 2014 Facebook Posts|repeatedly begging people to give him money/buy him LEGO sets]]. He did however show contempt for its competition - [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris Expresses His Outrage for Walmart|getting banned from his local Walmart for defacing an Xbox One standee]] - but this was the only thing he had to say about the modern "console wars" (which have been intense enough to be dramatized in ''[[South Park]]'', among other places).

This would change in [[February 2016]], around [[Chris's birthday|his 34th birthday]], he also purchased a Wii U some time later.

==The birthday saga==
===The outset===
On the first of the month, Chris [[February 2016 Facebook Posts#GIMME STUFF FOR MY BIRTHDAY|asked for a PS4 and PlayStation Camera on Facebook]] alongside a slew of specifications - notably, he [[February 2016 Facebook Posts#Not Dizzy Enough To Beg For PS4!|would later specify]] a white ''Destiny'' bundle. Whomsoever saw fit to waste their hard-earned money on this gift would be "reimbursed" with a $500 voucher for Chris's [[Etsy]] shop - Chris naturally believing that his comics, [[medallions]], and [[Sonichu Amiibo|amiibo]] are worth hundreds of dollars. In fact, a $500 voucher would probably allow the donator to buy everything in the shop and still have around $50 in now-useless funds to spare. Having already given extremely specific demands for this "gift", Chris would [[February 2016 Facebook Posts#A Beg Big Note|further elaborate]] that buying him ''anything less'' than the ''Destiny'' bundle ''and'' camera would reduce the value on the voucher.

===Sorry, but really though give me a PS4===
The twelfth would see Chris upload [[Apologies for offending people|a video]] that opens with a customarily insincere apology - though he openly states he doesn't understand why anyone would be offended - then ''reiterates his demands'' at the end of the video.

===Things go sour===
Incredibly, February 24th came and went without anyone sending him a PS4 - instead, [[weens]] sent Chris worthless gift cards and a losing lottery ticket. A day later, he would upload [[Update: 2/25/16|another video]] complaining about this. Bizarrely, Chris appeared to have been so confident that someone would send him an expensive video game console that he became somewhat depressed when they didn't.

==Chris finally gets one==
[[Image:20160305081202.jpg|thumb|Chris using PS4 applications - the first bit of evidence that he had purchased one.]]

However, despite all his whining, it transpired on 5 [[March 2016]] that he had, in fact, obtained a PS4. It was widely held that Chris had just bought it for himself, but Chris credited a "Miss Kagney Lynn Moore from Seattle, Washington" as the ludicrously magnanimous donor. Closer examination of his Facebook page and of the order details showed that, of course, Chris had just bought it himself.. The name of the fictional donor could be derived from Kagney Lynn Karter and Kevin Moore, who have appeared in [[Sex toys|porn films]] together.

==Epilogue==
Having spent hundreds of dollars on a toy, Chris began to beg incessantly for donations he did nothing to earn shortly after in [[HELP, PLEASE!!!|many videos]].

==PS4 games Chris owns==

<center>
[[Image:PSNTracker.png|PSN Activity tracker]] 
'''Chris''' was last spotted playing '''''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] Legacy of the Duelist''''' for the [[PlayStation 4|PS4]]. 
Chris has spent over '''$8581.62''' of [[Monthly tugboat|YOUR money]]! 
Chris's [[PSN]] is '''Sonichu'''. You can see his profile [http://psnprofiles.com/Sonichu here].
</center>

'''Note:''' This table only covers games Chris has earned at least one trophy in. Another table is shown below covering games that are at 0% and he has evidently not touched. A full list can be seen on his PSN profile, [http://psnprofiles.com/Sonichu here].

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|-
!align="left"|Game
!align="left"|Trophies
!align="left"|Progress
!align="left"|Comments
|-
||''[[LEGO]] [[Wikipedia:Lego Dimensions|DIMENSIONS]]''
|78
|100%
|A "[[toys]]-to-life" game (ala ''Skylanders'' or [[Sonichu Amiibo|amiibo]]) that is rather infamous for [[Chris and money|being much more expensive]] than its competitors.
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Life Is Strange|Life is Strange]]''
|61
|100%
|
|-
|''My Name is Mayo''
|51
|100%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Ratchet & Clank (2016 video game)|Ratchet & Clank]]''
|47
|100%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Life Is Strange: Before the Storm|Life is Strange: Before the Storm]]''
|35
|100%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:The Order: 1886|The Order: 1886]]''
|22
|100%
|
|-
|''Level 22''
|21
|100%
|
|-
|''[[Sonic]] [[Wikipedia:Sonic Mania|Mania]]''
|18
|100%
|
|-
|''Letter Quest Remastered''
|12
|100%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Three Fourths Home|Three Fourths Home: Extended Edition]]''
|7
|100%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back|Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back]]''
|22
|87%
|
|-
|''[[Sonic_the_Hedgehog#Sonic_Forces|Sonic Forces]]
|45
|80%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Crash Bandicoot (video game)|Crash Bandicoot]]''
|21
|80%
|
|-
|''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] Legacy of the Duelist''
|17
|80%
|
|-
|''Back to Bed''
|13
|80%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Gone Home|Gone Home]]''
|9
|71%
|
|-
|''[[PaRappa the Rapper]] Remastered''
|19
|51%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Don't Die, Mr. Robot!|Don't Die, Mr. Robot!]]''
|7
|38%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Minecraft|Minecraft]]: PlayStation 4 Edition''
|38
|31%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Burnout Paradise|Burnout Paradise]] Remastered''
|25
|31%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Giana Sisters: Twisted Dreams|Giana Sisters: Twisted Dreams]] - Director's Cut''
|6
|31%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Lego Worlds|LEGO Worlds]]''
|26
|29%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Crash Bandicoot: Warped|Crash Bandicoot: Warped]]''
|10
|23%
|
|-
|''[[Little Big Planet]] [[Wikipedia:LittleBigPlanet 3|3]]''
|10
|21%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Uncharted: Drake's Fortune|Uncharted: Drakes' Fortune]] Remastered''
|15
|20%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:PaRappa the Rapper 2|PaRappa the Rapper 2]]''
|4
|19%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Bit.Trip#The_Bit.Trip|THE BIT.TRIP]]''
|9
|18%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Freedom Planet|Freedom Planet]]''
|3
|15%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Pure Chess|Pure Chess]]''
|3
|14%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Minecraft: Story Mode|Minecraft: Story Mode]]''
|7
|13%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:The Disney Afternoon Collection|The Disney Afternoon Collection]]''
|2
|10%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Skylanders: SuperChargers|Skylanders SuperChargers]]''
|5
|9%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:DC Universe Online|DC Universe Online]]''
|5
|8%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Destiny (video game)|Destiny]]''
|6
|7%
|Star of [[CWC's Destiny start|a "Let's Play"]] (that was [[Brutal Legend|completely silent]], thanks to Chris's cluelessness).
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Sword Art Online: Lost Song|Sword Art Online: Lost Song]]
|4
|6%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:The Playroom (2013 video game)|THE PLAYROOM]]''
|2
|6%
|A collection of AR minigames built into the system. Most notable for being banned from streaming after a man [[Chris and sex|stripped and groped his drunk wife]] live.
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Shovel Knight|Shovel Knight]]''
|4
|5%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:ZombiU|ZOMBI]]''
|3
|4%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Skylanders: Trap Team|Skylanders Trap Team]]''
|2
|3%
|
|-
|''[[God of War]]''
|2
|2%
|
|-
|''[[Guitar Hero]] [[Wikipedia:Guitar Hero Live|Live]]''
|2
|2%
|
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Mother Russia Bleeds|Mother Russia Bleeds]]
|2
|2%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Skylanders: Swap Force|Skylanders SWAP Force]]''
|2
|2%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Mighty No. 9|Mighty No. 9]]''
|1
|1%
|
|-
|''[[Transformers]] [[Wikipedia:Transformers: Devastation|Devastation]]''
|1
|1%
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Payday2|PAYDAY 2: Crimewave Edition]]''
|1
|1%
|
|-
|}

===Games at 0%===
Chris has 29 games which have been purchased but without trophies or progress which can be assumed to have not been booted up.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|-
!align="left"|Game
!align="left"|Release Date
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Uncharted 2: Among Thieves|Uncharted 2: Among Thieves]] Remastered''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Hitman Go|Hitman GO]]: Definitive Edition''
|2016
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception|Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception]] Remastered''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Toy Soldiers: War Chest|Toy Soldiers War Chest]]''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Tetris Ultimate|Tetris Ultimate]]''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Helldivers|HELLDIVERS]]''
|2015
|-
|''The Treasures of Montezuma 4''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:PixelJunk Shooter|PixelJunk Shooter]] Ultimate''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:The Swapper|The Swapper]]''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Hohokum|Hohokum]]''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Infamous Second Son|inFAMOUS Second Son]]''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Woah Dave!|Woah Dave!]]''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Retro City Rampage|Retro City Rampage]] DX''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Race the Sun (video game)|Race The Sun]]''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Grim Fandango|Grim Fandango]] Remastered''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Killzone Shadow Fall|Killzone Shadow Fall]]''
|2013
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Call of Duty: Black Ops III|Call of Duty: Black Ops III]]''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Nova-111|Nova-111]]''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Thomas Was Alone|Thomas Was Alone]]''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Terraria|Terraria]]''
|2014
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Hotline Miami|Hotline Miami]]''
|2014
|-
|''Invokers Tournament''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Knack (video game)|KNACK]]''
|2013
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Lone Survivor (video game)|Lone Survivor]]''
|2013
|-
|''Shütshimi''
|2015
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Doom (2016 video game)|DOOM]]''
|2016
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Overwatch (video game)|Overwatch: Origins Edition]]''
|2016
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Psycho-Pass: Mandatory Happiness|Psycho-Pass: Mandatory Happiness]]''
|2016
|-
|''Uncanny Valley''
|2017
|}
{{Template:Relics of Fail}}
[[Category:Sony]]
[[Category:Video Games]]

Greene County Conspiracy

2018-07-23T23:11:26Z

MindHit: /* Analysis */

'''100_2178.MOV''' is a video uploaded to [[YouTube]] on 8 [[May 2010]] in which [[Chris]], lonely and lost at the bottom of a depression-well, reflects on the state of his life. The video gives Christorians a look into how utterly detached Chris is from [[Chris and Reality|reality]].

==Analysis==
Chris made this video after coming home alone from an EXTREME ACTION SPORTS show to which he had won 4 tickets from a radio call-in contest. As he could not find anyone else to go with him, even after he called the members of his Church's Young Adult Social Group, he was forced to scalp the tickets in front of the stadium and then sit alone in the bleachers beside a "lovey-dovey couple" (who probably haven't even got a [[I Pimp My Ride.MOV|pimped out PS3 controller]]) while handsomer, happier, less [[autistic]] men did flips on motorcycles for the roaring crowd. This situation causes Chris to reflect introspectively on his life, or at the very least complain about the latest faults that have occurred since [[Jackie E-mails|he and Jackie broke apart]].

Chris, with his [[Ego#Persecution_complex|victim complex]], inexplicably blames the Greene County school board (which tried to pull him out of [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]] when he was a child) for heading a conspiracy to keep him in his "autistic shell"--first by supposedly trying to institutionalize him for being autistic then, after many years with no interaction with him, going so far as to pay a realtor over $9,000<ref>A rough estimate of a realtor's fee, given an appraised home value of $161,200 and [http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/05/11/60minutes/main2790865.shtml a realtor's commission of 6%].</ref> to keep his [[14 Branchland Court|family's house]] in [[Ruckersville]] from selling so that his family would have to move back to a town where he had fewer friends after high school.

[[File:ThePatriots1.png|thumb|This is what Chris actually believes.]]
He is not aware that:
*About 19 other students in the district were also autistic <ref>Assuming autism is distributed uniformly, that [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:US-autism-6-17-1996-2007.png roughly 1%] of the population was autistic, and that there were 2,000 students in the Green County school district at the time. [http://www.localschooldirectory.com/district-schools/039/Greene-County-Public-Schools-District/VA There are now around 3000.]</ref> and weren't paid special attention to by the school board.
*Every member of that board works a full-time [[Chris's resume|job]] and many also have children. Therefore, none of them would have the motivation to [[Trolls|hound]] Chris for a decade.
*All his supposed friends from Chesterfield County (with whom he admits to have had little interaction outside of school<ref>[[Kacey Call 20]]</ref>) have long since moved on with their lives, are now similarly indisposed, and would have nothing to gain by spending time with him even if all of them were neighbors.
*If the board hated Chris so much, then they would have tried to expel him in the first place.

Using the board as a not-so-convenient excuse to ignore the fact that he himself is the only consistent factor in his unbroken series of failures, he goes on to muse that they bribed [[Michael Snyder]] (years later again) to ban him from [[The GAMe PLACe]]. There is no "evidence" yet linking them to [[Mary Lee Walsh]], the [[Jerkop|Jerkops]], or the 15,000 some-odd people of Greene County who somehow spontaneously decided not to be Chris's friends for no reason. Chris seems to restrain himself from [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|calling Snyder a "greedy Jew"]], stopping after "greedy". He ends the video by wishing that they, Michael Snyder, and the [[trolls]] would all go to hell for playing [[Kick the Autistic]].

Perhaps coincidentally, the video was uploaded 16 years to the day since [[Bob]]'s case against Greene County was thrown out of court.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Greene County Conspiracy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HrdY2OWNKn0}}
| stardate = 08 [[May 2010]]
| subject = {{Autism|[[Stress|Life]]}}
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}, {{Rage|text}}, {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Game Place|text}}
| shirt = {{OrangeSleeveless|text}}
| previous = [[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]
| next = [[05142010]]
}}

{{quote|We were forced to move back here because of you goddamn... people who were afraid of autistic individuals.}}

=== Transcript ===

[''Chris sits in the dark in front of his TV, which is, shockingly, turned off. He is visible only in silhouette. A fan hums in the background.'']

This is [[Christian Weston Chandler]], alias ''Christopher'' Weston Chandler, pre [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|1990-something]]. Anyway, I-I have sent this message to all the peo- ...ple that were of the [[Greene County]] School Board... and such... during the [[1990s]]... because... Threatening to put me in a mental institution. That was pretty much why we had to run away... and move to Chesterfield County, and I had better life over there, I had a lo- I had so many friends over there, in high school. And I was just ''sad'' to leave, when I, after I graduated. 'Cause I had to leave all my friends. I had the good life. But we were forced to move back here.

You people of Greene County, you could not have left us, uh, left me and my family alone. You had to go and pay off the realtors, just so, this h- so that this house here could not have been sold. If it, 'cause if it had been sold, we would have been able to stay in Chesterfield County. [''[[sigh]]''] And I would have been ha- I would have had a lot- a happier life over there, than right now and how I'm feeling. If, right now, because we ha- 'cause we were forced to move back here because of you goddamn... people who were afraid of [[autistic]] individuals.

[''sigh'']

You individuals would know who you are. I wish my family and I did not have to move back here. I wish we could have stayed in Chesterfield County, 'cause I had the better life there. And we were doing we- we were doing well, but you had to drag us down! You had to make us unable to sell our house here. You had to ''force'' my family to move back here, where I was okay and I have a couple of friends, and I'm better off with... [''Voice cracks, shakes arm to gesture at room.''] '''stuff.'''

That stuff is no good if I don't have, if I don't have many friends to share it with. [''Chokes back tears.'']

And it all just went downhill. I bet, even Greene County had something to do with influencing that goddamn [[Michael Snyder]] to see f- to see any... so recourse... or... anything like that to make him pretend to have a reason to kick me out, quote-unquote "''scaaaaring'' his customers away!" [''Flips off the camera''] You goddamn, greedy... ''Snyder''!

I was at the John Paul Jones Arena earlier tonight, at the Extreme Action Sports. I had won four tickets the previous Friday, Friday of the last week, from 95.1. The few [[Trolls|friends]] I have here could not have come- could not come with me, and I could not even find anyone in the congregation to take- to go with me. 'Cause I misplaced directory for one reason. And even with the help of, uh, my pastoral counselor to get in contact with them, they did not call- none of them called me back!

And I had to sell the... tickets I had, and I had to sit there next to a... lovey-dovey couple. [''His voice begins to crack.''] Which, that was okay, you know, I was trying to be... good- I was trying to be good friend, you know... [''scratches back of head''] Sociable. [''sigh''] But still, if that was... If I had stayed in Chesterfield County, and I would- and I had a similar situation for an event there... [[Chris and reality|I would definitely have had my friends I had there]]. Moving back here, it just dragged me downhill. So I tell you what, Greene County... Because you saw fit to make- to make me and my family have to move back here, just to make me sad, and move more into my Autistic Shell: ''you did it''.

If I had stayed in Chesterfield County, I would have been a whole lot better off. I wish you would, I wish you would have let us sell our house here. We could have stayed there. I wish you had- I wish we did not have to move back to [''sigh''] I wish we did not have to move back here nearly ten years ago.

Laugh all you want, trolls! Because... I don't give a ''damn''. You're all just immature, [[naïve]], condescending, soulless ''monsters''. [[Chris and hypocrisy|You don't ''care'' about others]], you only care about yourselves. You only care about getting your own laughs and kicks, because you don't h- you don't have your own social life! You [[Death threats|threaten]] me from ha- from trying to seek one of my own, by scaring me on the Internet and whatnot.

Including Clyde Cash, you can all go to hell. And all the people that were on the Greene County School Board during the 1990s then that forced us to have to move back here, '''sit and spin...''' Hell.

And Michael Snyder, I hope you go to Hell, too!

And for everybody el-, as for everybody else... Peace.
{{-}}

==Michael Snyder's reply==
{{quotebox|When I go to hell, I will hold the door open for you, if not not too busy giving tours. I can't believe I've spent all these years conspiring to make your life more miserable than your fossilized parents could ever dream of. Oh, wait, I wasn't doing that, I've been too busy living my own life. I remember you as a child creeping out all the other pokemon kids, including my own, because even 10 years ago you were an angry, unsportsmanlike punk. 
Signed, 
That goddamn Michael Snyder}}

==Fan videos==
{|align="center"
|{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris Chan's Confession
| video = {{#ev:youtube|vRQtkDUHCF4}}
| maker = MWillBuoy
| stardate = 9 May 2010
| type = }}
|}
|{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The truth YOU weren't supposed to know: CWC Expose
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Nna4NOyHiyE}}
| maker = SyntheNeko
| stardate = 10 May 2010
| type = }}
|}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Greene County Conspiracy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Rv7hvbTgKAg}}
| maker = MycalFelps
| Stardate = 01 [[Aug 2010]]
| type = }}

==References==
<references />

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]|nextlink=[[05142010]]}}
{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, May 2010| 2010-05-08]]

CWC-isms

2018-07-12T16:20:57Z

MindHit: /* S */ typo

<center>{{Honest}}</center>

One of [[Chris]]'s most notorious features is his strange vocabulary. Like many children who don't feel comfortable referring to [[Honest Content|adult concepts]] directly, Chris often resorts to creating cutesy euphemisms for a lot of words that anyone else his age would generally use with little reservation, which is common with autistic people. While some of them are understandable — after all, nobody would really relish discussing their [[Butt garments|diapers]] — others, such as "[[tobacky]]" instead of "tobacco", only serve to turn an otherwise normal sentence into an advertisement for Chris's childish nature. Others are attempts to be clever that fail miserably, for example, he refers to [[semen]] as "[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|navy]]", because semen sounds like sea men, [[Random-access humor|get it?]] Combine this with the idiosyncratic speech patterns that are common among [[autism|autistics]], and you get his so-called '''CWC-isms'''.

CWC-isms may be combinations or butchered versions of words or phrases that already exist, entirely new words, commonplace words that he uses repeatedly in a peculiar or obsessive way, or entirely new phrases that Chris often has to explain afterwards because nobody knows what he's talking about.

==Primary categories of CWC-isms==
There are 5 main types of CWC-isms:
# '''CWC-neologism''' - a ''new'' word or phrase, which didn't exist before, and was first ''created by Chris''. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#L|Lovehogs]]'', a portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehogs".
# '''CWC-euphemism''' - a ''preexisting'' word or phrase, which Chris for some strange reason gave a ''totally different meaning'' than it was meant to. Example: ''[[Duck]]'', meant to denote a bird, Chris uses it to denote his penis.
# '''CWC-anachronism''' - an ''obscure'' word or phrase which Chris has learned somewhere and now likes to utter pretty often, and which ''became characteristic'' for Chris's way of speaking/writing. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#I don't care for|I don't care for smth.]]'', a phrase Chris uses almost every time he expresses hate for something or someone.
# '''CWC-misspelling''' - only the ''most notable'' of Chris's ''misspellings'': those, which became characteristic for Chris's way of writing. Example: ''[[Geinus]]'', what he deems himself to be.
# '''Other shit''' - or Miscellaneous.
These 5 Main Types of CWC-isms are here to help you determine, if a word or phrase is a CWC-ism. If it fits the first 4 types, it most probably is. If it doesn't, it most probably isn't. Only the most important and notable of exclusions go into the 5th Type.

__NOTOC__

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; center:0">{{Alphabet ToC}}</div>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |
==#==
|-
|
;[[4-Cent Garbage]]
<blockquote>
1. (''noun'') The headquarters of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4-Chan]] trolls in [[Sonichu]].

<blockquote> ''You will recognize her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of '''4-cent-garbage''' will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==A==
|-
|
;abreast
<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') full of; filled with.

<blockquote>''It was not until after saving the city from the forces of Count Graduon and his minions, that she realized her form's new assets. And she was '''abreast''' with delight and glee when she found not the Male Part, but a Vagina! grin emoticon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2015_Facebook_posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''In fact, while I am fairly educated about Tribadism and '''abreast''' with theories, I would appreciate some experience with a lesbian or two who knows what she likes to enlighten me better, including on sensual massage and all that.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2015_Facebook_posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Like with many other words he isn't so familiar with, Chris uses this word in order to sound smart, failing to realize that the word "abreast" actually means "adjacent" <ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/abreast</ref>. A possible confusion with the word "abound".</blockquote>

;Adult Swim
<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') pornographic or otherwise "NSFW"; containing [[Honest Content|adult content]].

<blockquote>''She still has a great drawing style, even for the '''Adult Swim''' section."<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/night-star-delivers-christines-side-of-the-story.33062/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refers to the Cartoon Network block, [[Adult Swim]]. Chris seemed to only consider the "Adult" part of this block's name, and therefore assumed he could use this phrase to describe anything that's "adult" to him.

</blockquote>

;adulterous
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Of an [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|adult]] and mature nature

<blockquote>''Originally it was supposed to be like, you know, like ages 7 and up, but then I end up going to the content, uh, it could be considered, be like, be like definitely be considered '''adulterous'''.''<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: usually used to describe people who [[Ivy|cheat]] on their [[Blanca Weiss|partners]] (i.e. guilty of adultery), Chris only notices the "adult" component of the word.

2. ''(adjective)'' Insult of unclear nature
<blockquote>''Heeeeey, folks! It's me, [[Clyde Cash]]. I am the ruler of the internet and the internet trolls. I am an '''adulterous''' foe, a bastard and a self-righteous idiot who spends his time wallowing and trolling the one Christian Weston Chandler, and making up a whole bunch of dadgum rumors all over the internet!''<ref>[[100 2267]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris simply throws out the insult without a clear understanding of the word. Possibly referring to Clyde taking [[PandaHalo]] from Chris, though this is more aptly described as cuckoldry.

</blockquote>

;an' anurr thing
<blockquote>
1. ''(Phrase, transitionary)'' Signifies that Chris wishes to make another point about a subject he is discussing, and that he wishes he were Peter Falk.

<blockquote>''An' anurr thing...CHRIS. Your for real- your real name, as I have been told by Kacey, is only Chris Chandler! No "-tian," no "-topher," just Chris! So, admit that. '''An' anurr thing''', I NAME is NOT IAN! BRANDON!!! SOMETHING!!!!!''<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: a corruption of "and another thing". Used constantly when Chris is angry.

</blockquote>
;[[Anchuent Prophecy|anchuent]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Anything that is archaic in the ''Sonichu'' canon.

<blockquote>
''Well, what's this? I'm havin' an upgrade? Huh! Huh! My- my powers are given me the ability to fly with my wings attached to my head! It's like a w- it's like an add-on! That's optional! Huh! Must have been done by '''Anchuent''' Powers, so awesome I can fly now! Huh!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially, "anchuent" was taken to be a misspelling of the word "ancient" given Chris's [[Chris and English|poor grasp of the English language]]. Over time, however, it was revealed that "anchuent" was meant to be a portmanteau of the words "ancient" and "Sonichu", adding the "chu" part of "Sonichu" into the word "ancient". <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook</ref> </blockquote>

;and such
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items; to add to a list.

<blockquote>''At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera '''and such'''.''<ref>[[CWC Blog|Cwcipedia captain's log, 25 November 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris understands the term's meaning, but uses it superfluously.
</blockquote>

;artery

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' art.

<blockquote>''Good evening, but between this and the, uh, oh, and the other clips I would like to present you, uh, a few examples of hand '''artery'''.''<ref>[[CWC - Hand Drawn Original]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Not to be confused with the term for blood vessels. Chris doesn't seem to realize "art" is already a noun and doesn't need the suffix.
</blockquote>

;as such

<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' In the manner previously described.

<blockquote>''They just hated me because they don't, they did not understand people with autism. And so they tortured me '''as such'''.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris overuses this phrase to the point of self-parody. He's either tacking it on to fill space when he can't think of the next thing to say, or he's peppering it into his language in a feeble attempt to sound intelligent.
</blockquote>

;[[Attraction Location|attraction location]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any place Chris may sit to gain the attention of any passing women, only to get promptly kicked out afterward.

<blockquote>''Also, as of early November, I was reemitted into the Fashion Square Shopping Center, and since Mid-December, I totally left the UVA as an '''Attraction Location'''.
''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having a very difficult socializing with women, thought that sitting around in a certain place and soliciting himself would be a better alternative. Therefore, it would make sense to him to sit in a location with many people in order to gain the attention of several women. </blockquote>

;attraction time

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The time that is spent at an attraction location

<blockquote>''Then, on my next visit to the mall, I felt seriously depressed about what had happened the other day; it killed my '''attraction time'''''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;audio-sonic feeling

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the arousing feeling caused by getting hit by sound waves

<blockquote>''Here is a most '''audio-sonic feeling'''. While at the club last night, the music was loud, maybe reverberating or echoing. The music and beats literally shook up my rack! I actually Felt the music playing and reverbing within my breasts, almost like my breasts had become a pair of speakers. It Felt Amazing and Arousing!
''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/cwcville/photos/a.447204945915.244245.167832525915/10152771303590916/?type=3&theater</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As shown in the quote above, Chris believed that he was experiencing arousal through feeling the soundwaves on his body. In actuality, sound, a vibration<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound</ref>, creates pressure. The higher the amplitude of this wave (The louder the sound), the more pressure gets created from the wave, thus a louder wave should be able to hit Chris given that he's a huge target, and it creates that "arousing" feeling, which is actually an alternation between high and low pressures, which hits his body.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== B ==
|-
|

;B-dog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Derogatory epithet for women.

<blockquote>''Then that [[Mary Lee Walsh|'''B-Dog''']] ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Retarded censorship of the word "bitch". [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is implied to say this in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], when she shouts "BEEE..!!!" at [[Silvana]].<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_8/Page_95|Issue 8 Pages 94-95}}</ref>
</blockquote>

;bally
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' round; having the texture of a perfectly round ball.

<blockquote>''I've always given her a "'''Bally'''-Scratch" where I stroke her head with all five fingers like as if I was gently squeezing a rubber ball.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2004-2006</ref></blockquote>

Origin: If one didn't know Chris was referring to his dog, Patti, and that he gives her a "Bally-scratch" on the head, one might conclude that he's fondling someone's genitals. Chris, [[CWC-isms#N|naive]] to how suggestive this sounds, gave this special kind of petting the name "Bally-scratching" because of how stroking her head felt like he was squeezing a rubber ball.</blockquote>

;Be Woman
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Be '''a''' woman.

<blockquote>''I am a Lesbian Transwoman; I am not confused or mentally ill about that; '''I Am Woman.'''''<ref>[[2017_tweets#Proud_to_be_a_feminist]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''How Dare You Insult and be so Inconsiderate of Her like that? '''She Is Woman'''; she would Never Revert Back.''<ref>[[NightStar2891_tweets#She_is_woman]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used regularly when Chris asserts his [[Tomgirl|transgender identity]], notable for the consistent lack of a proper article and capitalization of each word in the phrase. Originally only attested in the first person ("I Am Woman"), a post on Chris's [[Miss Night Star]] Twitter sockpuppet account uses the third person ("She Is Woman"). Technically first appears in [[Sonichu 8]] when [[The Incredible Lioness]] attacks [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], as the somewhat cliché musical reference [[wikipedia:I Am Woman|"I am woman, hear me roar!"]], which may have inspired Chris's broader use of the phrase.
</blockquote>



;[[Biological clock|biological clock]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Wikipedia:Circadian Rhythm|circadian rhythm]]

<blockquote>'''I have a lot of stored caffeene [sic] in my energy supply, and not only kept me on my toes, but has also messed up my fucking '''biological clock''' as well.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Biological_clock</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although technically not used incorrectly in this context, the phrase "biological clock" is used exclusively for women in their child-bearing years. Possibly a confusion with "internal clock".
</blockquote>

;blangry
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' [[Chris and anger|Angry]].

<blockquote>''Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''BLANGRY'''! ''<ref>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Given Chris's belief that he has [[Chris and English|mastered the English language]] and his [[speech impediment]], it's likely he fucked up saying angry.
</blockquote>

;blue-printed
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Skilled in engineering.

<blockquote>''I like many others, was born a foal; to a '''blue-printed''' Pegasus and a country tomboy earth mare.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot_20171019-235945_01-png.299275/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris portrayed Bob's Pony Counterpart in [[Sonichu 12-9]] as an engineer, just like the real [[Bob]]. Due to Chris's limited vocabulary, Chris knew very little words he could use to describe Bob's profession. Derived from the word "blueprints", the plans set for the design of a product. </blockquote>

;[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Single; particularly used on women.

<blockquote>''Ahh, well, it's been over a year and ten months now since I started my sweetheart-search; I still haven't found a '''boyfriend-free'''-caring-smoke-free-non-alcoholic-white-girl-near-my-age to build a relationship with from the ground up.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;Buddha belly
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Excess fat that gives a person a [[obesity|very round appearance]].

<blockquote>''Okay, well, I admit I do have a '''Buddha belly''', but I am not lazy, I do get out and about, I exercise, I jog and work out, and I eat healthy.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Buddha|Buddha]]" is a title given to several legendary figures in [[Wikipedia:Buddhism|Buddhism]]. In this case, Chris is making reference to [[wikipedia:Budai|Budai]], who is often known as "Fat Buddha". Chris presumably picked up the phrase from the [[Family Guy]] episode "To Love and Die in Dixie."
</blockquote>

;buh bye bay nose
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' but if anybody knows.

<blockquote>''If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in da bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose''' the whereabouts of the... [[JERKS|jerk]]... and just happens to be nearby... or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.''<ref>[[Christian's Update 13 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
;[[Butt garments|butt garment]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' adult diaper; typically one used to control Chris's [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontenence]].

<blockquote>''The doctor corrected that they were liners; he never called them diapers. Neither did Chris- he called them “'''butt garments'''”.''</blockquote>

Origin: To avoid embarrassment from stating that he shits himself constantly, and uses diapers, Chris refers to his adult diapers as butt garments.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== C ==
|-
|
[[File:CWCtrek1.png|400px|right|thumb|The Autistic Generation]]

;C-Log
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Captain's Log.

<blockquote>'''''C-Log''' February 4th, 2010. First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make.''<ref>[[I am Alive]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;C Ville (or C-Ville)
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' [[Charlottesville, VA]].

<blockquote>''Look, you're going to back in '''C-Ville''' tomorrow, I can meet you at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes, what time is good for our meeting?''<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Generic term for any city whose name fits the pattern of beginning with "C" and ending with "ville," e.g., [[CWCville]], Charlottesville, etc.

<blockquote>''And when you diss Cwcville you disf- you diss every "'''C Ville'''" within these United States.''<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;[[Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The typical opening for a vlog video Chris makes to adress the fanbase, which includes the date of production.

<blockquote>'''''Captain's Log'''. Stardate: September... 24th, 2008.''</blockquote>

Origin: One may come to the conclusion that Chris may have picked up this phrase from Star Trek, however, Chris is not a fan of the Star Trek franchise, nor has he seen any clips of the show<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_3</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_14</ref>. It is more likely that Chris must have picked up the phrase from cartoons like [[Family Guy]], which references Star Trek, considering how he watched the show religiously.</blockquote>

;carniverous
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' evil, vengeful.

<blockquote>''On today's show, we will take a close-up look at the '''carniverous''' jerkops.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic5P29.htm</ref></blockquote>Origin: A misspelling of "carnivorous". It is unknown what word Chris meant to use here, but "carnivorous" certainly wasn't it.</blockquote>

;[[China|china]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Female genitalia

<blockquote>''I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, uncomfortable with directly saying the word "vagina", decided to alter the word to a cutesy, similar-sounding word.</blockquote>

;coldest shoulder

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' to rebel.

<blockquote>''Those people like me at the very least, NOT counting all of the deceitful people I have had the displeasure of knowing who turned '''Coldest Shoulder''' Against me and STARTED all of the Online Hatred.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/April_2012_Facebook_posts</ref>

''One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time Manajerks who gives her elders the '''coldest of shoulders'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Coffee_Place</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the phrase "turning a cold shoulder", a phrase used for the negligence of another person<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/turn-a-cold-shoulder-to</ref>. </blockquote>

;[[Comeuppance|comeuppance]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Male orgasm.
<blockquote>''...I feel my '''comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my [[semen]] is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop. (...) And right after I'd given you my first round, my first '''comeuppance''', you would take, you would reach down, and you would take your face away from my penis...''<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' [[Semen]], usually immediately after ejaculation. ''See also: [[CWC-isms#N|Navy]]''
<blockquote>''Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first dosage of my '''comeuppance'''!''<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses the sexual slang "cum" as a [[For Julie's Eyes Only|verb]] for orgasm, but he may not realize it can also be a noun referring to ejaculate. In his mind, "comeuppance" apparently serves that purpose, viz., "that which has come/cum up."

In the real world, "comeuppance" is an English noun meaning [[Wiktionary:comeuppance|outcome which is justly deserved]] based upon the common verb "come," i.e., the state of coming forward to receive judgment. He is either unaware of the original definition of the word or does not appreciate the irony of telling women he's going to give them comeuppance.

Note that the contexts of the real word and Chris's version are different. When a woman is rebuked, she receives her comeuppance; when a woman gets Chris's hot load in her face, she receives ''his'' "comeuppance."
</blockquote>

;crooks
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Those who may steal Chris's intellectual property for malicious purposes. ''(pl.)''

<blockquote>''I aways keep my eyes open for '''crooks''' who take my [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]]'s name and put it in offensive use!''<ref>''[[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg|116-CWCCop.jpg]]''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' websites, and even words on websites which communicate lies about Chris.

<blockquote>''And that [[ED]] page is one of those crooks. Every page--every word on the discussion page is a '''crook'''.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A finishing move Chris does on his adversaries in order to "curse" them, public or otherwise. Performed in the same way it is in Dragonball.

<blockquote>''Hmmm...'''Curse-ye-ha-me-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NO_D***_WAY,_IMPOSTOR!!!</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes that he possesses [[Chris and reality#Magic|magical powers]]. Typically, these so-called magical powers would be used whenever an enemy gets in the way of whatever he wants to do, since Chris is too afraid to actually fight anyone. Therefore, he will rely on this magical power in order to gain control of whoever is giving him trouble.</blockquote>

;CWC-sense
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The ability to sense Chris's presence.

<blockquote> ''Seriously though, awesome timing coming in, just as we, and Chris, had just finished writing the lyrics...was your '''CWC-sense''' tingling?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== D ==
|-
|
[[File:Daupdate.jpg|thumb|400px|[[Megan]], comparing Chris's [[Chris and his Ego|attitude]] to [[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]].]]

;D.A.
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Unexplained, presumably a substitution to avoid the word "dumbass." Most likely ''not'' "District Attorney," although equally applicable to [[Marvey Blaziken]].

<blockquote>''You are obviously a troll trying to pick on my nerves; nice try, '''D.A.'''''<ref>[[Mailbag 15]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris intermittently decides to self-censor his profanities for the benefit of younger readers.
</blockquote>

;da
<blockquote>1. ''(article)'' [[Wikipedia:Eye dialect|Eye dialect]] spelling of the word [http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the the].

<blockquote>''Y'all know me as [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta Sonichu]], '''da''' DJ with da power!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], page 43</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris writes "the" as "da" when he intends for his characters (or himself) to sound laid-back and cool. This is most notable with Jamsta Sonichu, who is supposed to sound like a hip radio DJ and/or a [[Niggos|black man]]. Chris may intend at times to do the same thing in his verbal communications, although his [[speech impediment]] makes it difficult to tell when he actually means to say "da."
</blockquote>

;Da Update

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The latest news.

2. ''(phrase)'' The most recent fail Chris is responsible for.

<blockquote>''Hey, guys! What's '''da update'''?''</blockquote>

Origin: Dialogue used by Chris, in an exceedingly awkward attempt to sound casual, in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. As Chris's [[fans]] have searched the Internet for the latest news from our hero, "da update" has become shorthand for "the latest [[Relics of Fail|failure]] Chris has committed." The phrase became legendary when posted above the Chris-chan talk page on [[ED]] (eventually the page was locked, forcing mass migration to the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]]).

</blockquote>

;[[Darling|darling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used on female friends to obtain their love and trust.

<blockquote>Thank you, Doopie '''Darling'''. :)<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2017_tweets#Thanks.2C_darling</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, so hellbent on being [[Chris and kindness|kind]] to just about any [[CWC-isms#N|not-troll]] he meets, thinks it would be appropriate to refer to women he doesn't know outside of the internet by pet names to sound like he really cares for them, despite it being creepy to most other people. Chris's main justification for using this word on women who don't bond with him is that the actor [[Wikipedia:Tallulah Bankhead|Tallulah Bankhead]] used this word a lot, ignoring the fact that she only does this while on set.</blockquote>

;[[Dating education|Dating Education]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' formal education in schools about dating people of the opposite sex.

<blockquote>''Also, in addition, while we also fully support Sexual Education in every high school, Christian Weston Chandler also highly recommends, and would gladly support, '''Dating Education''' classes, because, while Sex Ed is great for the eventual, well-earned intercourse after 3 or more dates, it is vital to learn what to do before that moment. It should be well0taught how to approach and ask one’s member of the opposite gender out for the very first date.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:DatingEducation.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The lack of "Dating Education classes" is something that Chris used to complain about all of the time, because he's simply incapable of finding a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]], and that it would be a great advantage for people of his type to learn how to obtain some [[CWC-isms#C|china]]. Chris doesn't understand that [[Chris and socialization|the way he behaves around people]], especially those [[Women|of the opposite sex]] has anything to do with it, and therefore should see a therapist to correct his socialization skills.</blockquote>

;detail
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A thing of importance that Chris cannot recall at any given moment.

<blockquote>''I do not have the appropriate calm state of mind to make time to READ those numerous upon numerous small-print '''details''', much less memorize them.''<ref>[[Wikipedia#May 2009 drama]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' Something that Chris does not understand.

<blockquote>''There was one I remember from then where the essay had a lot of offensive content, including smoking, and I spoke my mind on how offended I was of it. Plus other details I misunderstood that he was expecting in the assignments.'' <ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ability to retain information is questionable (unless it's about [[Sonichu (comic)|something]] [[Lego|he]] [[Pokémon|obsesses]] [[PS3|over]]). As such, he "misunderstands" and "forgets" a lot of glaringly important things, such as [[Father call|how to live on his own]] and [[Jackie E-mails 2|the fact that he cheated on Ivy]].
</blockquote>

;Did the do, to do the do
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To have sexual intercourse, likely under deceptive conditions

<blockquote>''[[Lovely Weather|Lovely]] was hot. She mistook me for myself and we went home from work that night, so Lovely and I '''did the do''', and it was awesome!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_2|Issue 10 Page 2}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Childish alteration of the common euphemism for sex, "doing it". Ripped off from [[Wikipedia:Emission_Impossible|an episode]] of [[Family Guy]].
</blockquote>

;dige
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''My name's [[Inos]]... wha' chu up to? I am eclectic on this hedge... high on the hog... you wan' som' of this '''dige''', mon?''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_70|Issue 10 Page 70}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended to be part of a coded reference to "Sonichu, Electric Hedgehog Digimon". It is not known why he changed the reference from "Pokemon" to "Digimon".
</blockquote>

;[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Used as a reference to Chris's fecal incontinence.

<blockquote>''I have NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF '''DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/IRC_(20_January_2009)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase during an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]] with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]] after they alluded that Chris has a fondness to wear women's underwear. In order to confirm his straightness, he retorted by admitting the fact that he has "NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS". Soon after, due to how humorous the phrase sounded, it became a shorthand for trolls to refer to Chris's fecal incontinence.</blockquote>

;disabled of crafting
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Too apathetic to work

<blockquote>''Since last December with the Lulu.com problems (resolved), that has left me with a bad emotional and mental scar. Leaving me feeling '''disabled of crafting'''...''<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy to work]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris being defensive when a customer asked how he could be trusted to follow through on an order, when he had failed to send out orders from his Etsy shop, which resulted in his seller account getting closed.
</blockquote>

;Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Backstabber

<blockquote>''You could be a Better, More Supportive Friend, instead of a '''Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic''' with your sweetheart!!!''<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-10-5-mad-at-kim-wilson.34948/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A butchering of the title of the Adult Swim cartoon, [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]].</blockquote>

;[[Duck|duck]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's penis

<blockquote>''MY '''DUCK''' HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially "duck" was taken to be a typo of "dick" since the "u" and "i" keys are close together. It was later revealed that Chris was using this negolism as an intentional euphemism to refer to his own penis.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mumble_8</ref>

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]]</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== E ==
|-
|

;elbow-greased

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Earned from hard work and exercise

<blockquote>''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism. It appears in his [[resume]], where he lists "elbow-greased strength" as one of his "functional skills"''</blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the idiom, "elbow-grease", a figure of speech humorously used for tasks that involve manual labor only. </blockquote>

;[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]''

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the characters found in Sonichu which are hybrids of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] characters and/or Pokemon.

<blockquote>''Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the '''Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon''' on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_resume</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Despite the name, a majority of "Electric Hedgehog Pokemon" are neither Pokemon or hedgehogs. This misnomer may come from Chris's original characters being hybrids of two Sonic characters, both of whom are hedgehogs (Sonic and Amy Rose) and two Pokémon (Pikachu and Raichu).</blockquote>

;emotional differences

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A strong disagreement between two people.

<blockquote>''I told you! It was, it was because of, uh, '''emotional differences.'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#The_Shit_Hits_the_Fan</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris mentioned that he got terminated from [[Wendy's]] in the [[Father Call]], due to their "emotional differences", possibly meaning that a heated argument between him and his employer ensued.</blockquote>

;empirical
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' resorting to experience to gain knowledge rather than through scientific means.

<blockquote>''So, throw away the book talk; be '''empirical''' and believe what you know is fact'' <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2012_Facebook_posts#Empirical</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris attributed the nearly opposite definition of the word to Jeremy Hilary Boob PhD, a character from [[Wikipedia:Yellow Submarine|''Yellow Submarine'']]. Considering this, Chris must have picked up this strange definition from the content in the Beatles Edition of ''Rock Band''.</blockquote>

;entendre

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Charisma or attraction

<blockquote>''Too much '''entendre'''?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the phrase "double entendre", a figure of speech used for words or phrases with a double meaning, [[Duck|typically]] [[Raincoat|with]] [[Mass Debating|one]] [[China|of]] [[Recycling|them]] [[Pickle|being]] [[Comeuppance|risque]].<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double%20entendre</ref> In English, the word "entendre" isn't typically used outside of the phrase itself, but in many other languages like French and Catalan, it is understood to mean "to hear" or "to understand". Chris, thinking he knows everything there is to know about the English language, once again thought he would sound smart by using this obscure word.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== F ==
|-
|
[[File:Fourboom.jpg|thumb|right|"G'Day welcome to Auschwitz"]]

;[[Fangs|fangs]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's canine teeth

<blockquote>''They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like '''fangs''' of a vampire, dog or something to me.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls#Your_understanding_me_fukky_.281_January_2009.29</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes his teeth to be unordinary compared to most other people's teeth. Because he believes his teeth to be menacing, he gave them the name "fangs". Once in a while, Chris would show off his decaying teeth to scare off his enemies. This usually works, although for the wrong reasons.</blockquote>

;faredoo
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection, imperative verb)'' Parting salutation, akin to "goodbye".

<blockquote>''Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. I bid you fond...'''faredoo'''. Adieu. Fond farewell adieu...''<ref>[[The MovingFoward videos]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Accidental portmanteau of "farewell" and "adieu".
</blockquote>

;fart-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb and perverted 

<blockquote>Ha Ha! Take THAT, you '''fart-minded''', jerk MALE among ALL fart-minded, jerk Males that make up the Majority of the Worldwide Male Population! -:D<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtWQTjXCDs</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the comment section of a Stopmotion Lego animation, where a ''Lego'' minifigure is in a sexual relationship with a ''Lego Friends'' minifigure. Throughout this video, the minifigure acts as what Chris believes most men to be like. At the end of the video, the Lego minifigure proceeds to fart, which disgusts the Lego Friends minifigure. Also a possible butchering of the phrase "brainfart", which is used to humorously refer to a moment of absentmindedness</blockquote>

;firstly
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' A word that indicates that Chris is about to tell someone why he's right. Often not followed by an enumerated list of reasons, despite the implication.

<blockquote>'''''Firstly''', Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills. and I'm High-Functionally Autistic''<ref>[[IRC_(02_January_2009)|IRC chat, 02 January 2009]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Use of "firstly" to begin a list, rather than "first," is a matter of dispute among linguistic fags. "Firstly" has fallen out of common use and tends to sound more formal, perhaps overly so. Chris seems to like this formality, probably because he thinks it sounds smart.
</blockquote>

;fondful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' fond

<blockquote>''Faithfully yours with '''fondful''' thoughts; Chris Chan.''<ref>[[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007|Chris's email to Megan Schroeder]], 06 July 2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently doesn't understand that "fond" is already an adjective by itself.
</blockquote>

;for good-like
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' final, but with the imagined possibility otherwise.

<blockquote>''And in June of 2008, he banned me from the store '''for good-like'''.''<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails|Chris's email to The Wallflower]], 18 February 2010</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusing modification of "for good".
</blockquote>

;foundate
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To dedicate, as in a monument or building.

<blockquote>''I, Christian Weston Chandler, re-'''foundate''' this monument that is the PAGE with MY SOLE HONEST TRUTH from my sound mind and heart.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#Captain.27s_Log.2C_Stardate:_June_6.2C_2009|2=Christian in his Own Words}}.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely a portmanteau of "found" and "dedicate", or a bizarre attempt to convert "foundation" into a verb.
</blockquote>

;four-boomerang-shaped symbol
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' minced oath for "[[Wikipedia:swastika|swastika]]," especially the ''Hakenkreuz'' symbol of the Nazi Party.

<blockquote>''Like Most People, I do not care much for Adolf; he was a terrible man, and even in jest, I WOULD NEVER want to portray him, much less, his '''four-boomerang-shaped symbol''' (I know what it is called, but I do not wish to type the word).''<ref>[[Mailbag 5#That wacky Hitler|Mailbag 5]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris was apparently afraid to say the word "swastika," probably for the same reason he used to fear using racial slurs.
</blockquote>

;[[Fuzzy-wuzzies|fuzzy-wuzzies]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The rewards of giving Chris compliments.

<blockquote>''Compliments will get you '''fuzzy-wuzzies'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Picked up from the children's book, ''[[A Warm Fuzzy Tale]]''.

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|prickly-wicklies]]
</blockquote>

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== G ==
|-
|
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|This is who Chris actually believes in.]]
;[[Gal pal|gal-pal]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a female friend.

<blockquote>''And also, I would like to give a shout-out to...Ivy, sweet '''gal-pal''' of mine...and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_18_March_2009_More_Updated</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Strangely enough, Chris rarely refers to any of his female friends as "friends", which stems from his belief that all female friends have the potential to be [[CWC-isms#S|sweethearts]]. Because of this, Chris refers to his female friends as his "girlfriends". To make it seem that he really cares for these "girlfriends", Chris refers to such women by a cutesy pet-name, namely "gal-pal".</blockquote>

;gawd
<blockquote>
1. ''(interjection)'' eye dialect of "god", Used in the place of "god" when it is used to express annoyance, shock, or pain.

<blockquote>''Life is f***ed up. (I had a real stressful Sunday afternoon) '''Gawd'''! Just... GAWD!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#STRESSFUL_SUNDAY._GAWD.21</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly meant to be used as a way past cool way to say "god" to add dramatic effect.</blockquote>

;gaybian
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a male lesbian

<blockquote>''Uh… simply put—and I am willing to say this… in sound mind and body: I… am a '''gaybian'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet</ref></blockquote>

Origin: With [[Clyde Cash]] threatening to harm [[Julie]], him forcing Chris to "come out of the closet", and Chris having no clue how to handle the situation, Chris thought it would be clever to admit he was gay, but yet he isn't attracted to men. Thus, he tacked on the word "gay" onto "lesbian" to create the word "gaybian".</blockquote>

;geinus
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a genius

<blockquote>''Robotnik! Robotnik! I'm a mad '''geinus'''! Robotnik, Robotnik!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_1</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An accidental misspelling of "genius", this CWC-ism is the result of Chris's ability to spell, or lack thereof. In his futile attempts to spell words with "eni", he substitutes this with "ein", possibly due to his habit of spelling words phonetically.</blockquote>

;give birth, give the birth
<blockquote>
1. ''(verb)'' To transfer possession of the state of having been born, by bearing as offspring.

<blockquote>''My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only '''gave the birth'''--gave me birth at their ages...which my mother is sixty-six, currently, and my father is currently eighty. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth...then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of--for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early [[1980s]].''<ref>[[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to think that a sentence like "Barbara gave birth to Christian" is grammatically equivalent to a sentence like "Barbara gave Go-bots to Christian."
</blockquote>

;go make a rhyme
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate that he is in a [[Chris and writing|poetic]] mood.

<blockquote> ''Oh, Back Off, '''go make a rhyme'''. Love will come your way in good time.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/913230475774369794</ref> Keep Heart, Have hope and faith. Life is a coinkie-dink strafe. Have an open heart, don’t be afraid. Your sweetie is likely in your friendship parade.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris intended to write a rhyme in order to sound poetic in a tweet, continuing with the rhyming schtick in several subsequent ones. Due to his own laziness, the best Chris could come up with in terms of words that rhyme with "time" is "rhyme".
</blockquote>

;[[Godjesus]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(shorthand)'' God and Jesus Christ.

<blockquote> ''As I have guide, as I was guide [sic] by, uh, God and Jesus. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, '''Godjesus''' were mad at me, so, even though she r-, even though she requested the recent items of question, sex-, [quietly] sexual stuff--videos and pictures--I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Matthew_5:27,_CWC_Confessions</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And also, who I'd like to thank, '''GodJesus''', our God and our Lord and savior, for their support, for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow, I am guided by Jesus.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_9_April_2009</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is somewhat aware of the Holy Trinity (Holy Spirit, Son, and Father), the three forms that God takes in mainstream Christianity. Despite accepting Jesus as the son of God, Chris believes that God and Jesus are essentially the same entity. As a result, whenever he mentions God, he is never reluctant to mention Jesus in the same sentence. Because of this, Chris made this CWC-ism as a shorthand of "God and Jesus".
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== H ==
|-
|
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris does NOT look like Chris Farley]]
;hand-drawing
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An original drawn image, as opposed to a facsimile of that image.

<blockquote>''I mean, does that look like a printout to you? No! It's a '''HAND-DRAWING'''! It's the original hand-drawing of the back cover I constantly used! Among all the other hand drawings on my SHELF! In my BINDERS! IN THIS ROOM! In this house!''<ref>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To sketch without the aid of digital technology, such as a computer.

<blockquote>''No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the '''hand-drawing''' and you draw everything on your PhotoShop with your computer mouse.''<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's process for producing his drawings is to draw them, by hand, on physical paper, and then scan the paper into his computer and use image editing software to add effects like lettering or (for the purpose of breaking the fourth wall) photographs. He takes comfort in the belief that ownership of the original paper drawings is evidence of his authorship and will frequently cite this in defense against perceived thieves and trolls.

Chris also thinks that drawing on a computer instead of paper is an inferior method of producing artwork; he thinks the results look "blocky and low-resolution," which probably speaks more to his [[:File:179-ShineSchuChara.jpg|his own experience using MSPaint]] than the artistic quality of, for example, [[Asperchu]]. The fact that a digital artist like Alec Benson Leary is nonetheless ''using his hands'' does not seem to have occurred to Chris.
</blockquote>

;[[heart level]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his emotional state

<blockquote>''100% Change the number to change your '''heart level''' and you can write a sentence to indicate how you feel.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Heart_level</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The concept of the "heart level" most likely stems from Chris's inability to understand emotions. As an alternative, Chris tends to use video game terms in order to measure such emotions.</blockquote>

;heartsweet
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Rosey, as often as birds tweet, will you be my lovely '''heartsweet'''?''<ref>"[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Rearrangement of "sweetheart," possibly coined initially to provide more rhyming options in poetry. Chris primarily uses this term in Sonichu's dialogue, as the character's pet name for Rosechu. When speaking for himself, Chris tends to prefer "sweetheart," although the trolls use "heartsweet" in conversation with him.

''See also: [[sweetbolt]]''
</blockquote>

;heavyweight
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Stockboy; person employed to move heavy objects and perform other menial labor.

<blockquote>If she gets pregnant and can't work, then I would be working. I would be working VERY HARD AND HEAVILY. [...] If I have to I would be, get one of the '''heavyweights''', that just moves the boxes around the, stock the shelves at a grocery store.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' heavy.

<blockquote>I do not think Chris Farley looks like me at all, plus he was a LOT more '''heavyweight''' than me, and he was more wild than me.<ref>[[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, as usual, has to repurpose words rather than use the existing words that already mean what he wants to say.
</blockquote>

;[[HEXBox]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the video game consoles made by Microsoft, primarily the XBox 360.

<blockquote>I never cared for the '''HEXBox''', and frankly it LACKS heavily in comparison to the Wii and PS3, PLUS YOU HAVE TO PAY THEIR FEES TO EVEN GO ONLINE OR DOWNLOAD DEMOS WITH IT.</blockquote>

Origin: Due to his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Brand Loyalty]], Chris had an irrational hatred for the XBox, simply because of how much you've got to pay for it to access some of its content<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_5</ref>. Because Chris viewed this device as a curse to humanity, he tacked the word "hex", which is defined as being a curse, onto the original name of the console.</blockquote>

;hide behind/under his mother's skirt
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' To behave in a cowardly, immature fashion.

<blockquote>''You come to me now. Come face me like a man. Unless you want to continue being called a cow-a quivelling coward who '''hides under his mother's skirt'''.''<ref>[[Challenge for Clyde II]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An antiquated phrase alluding to children literally hiding behind their mother's skirts when frightened.
</blockquote>

;[[homo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male homosexual

<blockquote>''Yes; the '''Homos''' I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Common_Questions''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' homosexual

<blockquote>''Every one of you who thinks I'm '''homo''' and calls me that—-because I am not; I'm straight! I'm straight!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' relating to homosexuals

<blockquote>''Again, to reiterate the issue, THE GOD DAMN F***IN' '''Homo''' Ads MUST BE GONE!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Blog</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had a hatred for homosexuals, out of fear that he'll become one himself. Even uttering words like "gay" and "homosexual" make him uncomfortable.</blockquote>

;[[Honest Content|honest]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' NSFW, containing adult content.

<blockquote>''Parental Advisory - VERY '''HONEST''' content.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P97.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only has a slightly good understanding of what honesty is. However, Chris doesn't seem to understand when it's most appropriate to be honest. In his mind, to attract mates, he has to be honest all of the time, even if this includes instances of his sexual misadventures. Chris knows that he's not supposed to discuss such topics with ordinary people, so he would have to keep such things in secret. Therefore, in his mind, it would be the "honest" thing to do to discuss such actions.
</blockquote>

;Hurtful Truth Level
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A point at which honest criticism should be stopped so as to avoid hurting a person's feelings, regardless of the usefulness of the advice.

<blockquote>''And another thing, When constantly exceeding that '''Hurtful Truth Level''' to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in an email to Jackie after she had pointed out several glaring flaws in Chris's lifestyle and personality. Rather than take her criticism to heart and improve himself, he got angry and defensive, wishing that she would show sympathy for him instead.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== I ==
|-
|
[[File:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|thumb|right]]

;I can feel the cosmos
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Statement of achievement and oneness with the universe.

<blockquote>''I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better. '''I can feel the cosmos!''' Peace.''<ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by a line from the game Katamari Damacy, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmWxNFq6_3U "Oh, I feel it. I feel the cosmos."]
</blockquote>

;I got a fish

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Claim that one owns a fish.

<blockquote>'''''I got a fish!''' Would ya like to make a wish?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Got_A_Fish</ref>
''I got a fish Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish?''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expressed angrily when you wish to break someone apart to kill them

<blockquote>''Jason Kendrick Howell... you BASTARD! BASTARD! You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even DESCRIBE it! YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW, BUT... '''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!''' Goodbye!''<ref>[[Jason Kendrick Howell message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as a [[death threat]] to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he has hacked Sonichu.net.</blockquote>

;IBAChandler
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Abbreviation for "I be a chandler," i.e., "I am a person named 'Chandler.'"

<blockquote>''I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that '''IBAChandler''' account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.''<ref>[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(proper noun)'' [[YouTube]] username in use by Christian Weston Chandler during his conflict with [[Liquid Chris]], leading trolls to accuse Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]].

3. ''(proper noun)'' Name of a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' villain based upon Liquid Chris, ironically named for the real Chris's alias.

<blockquote>'''''I B A Chandler''', And I am here to copycatly sieze claim of you hedgehogs and this city from your absent mayor's domain.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 79</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by [[Bob Chandler]]'s license plate, "I B MR C" ("I be Mister C.").<ref>[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;ID
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Identifying.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and Vestites; '''ID''' as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly derived from ID meaning "Identification". </blockquote>

;[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|infinitely high boyfriend factor]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the extremely high probability that any woman Chris talks to is not [[CWC-isms#boyfriend-free|boyfriend-free]].

<blockquote>''With the '''infinitely high Boyfriend-Factor''', I am not fond of about 99.999999999996% of the total male population, with a margin-of-error of the 4 billionth of a percent (for about 100 men) of whom are okay acquaintences.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_Aug-Dec_2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In general, Chris will almost never find a sweetheart.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F</ref> Already aware of this fact, but not willing to admit he's not at all attractive to most women, Chris blames it on the fact that most men are "jerks", and that one probably is already dating the woman he's trying to latch onto.</blockquote>

;instinction

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An instance of something being used a certain way.

<blockquote>''Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all '''instinctions''' and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_English</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Once again an instance of Chris trying to sound smart by using a word that sounds foreign to him, made up or otherwise. The end result, however, gives the impression that Chris isn't familiar with the word "instances".

</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== J ==
|-
|
;janekop
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A female [[CWC-isms#jerkop|jerkop]].

<blockquote>''YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. SO SAYS THIS '''JANEKOP'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Feelings_of_the_election_results</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas the term "jerkop" is a portmanteau of the CWC-ism "jerk" and the word "cop", janekop is a portmanteau of the words "jane" and "cop". The word "jane" is a slang word for "woman". <ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jane</ref>
</blockquote>
;[[JERKS|jerk]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. Any man that Chris dislikes, particularly one that gets in the way of his LoveQuest.

<blockquote>''On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel '''jerks'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "jerk" is generally defined as "A person with unlikable or obnoxious qualities and behavior, typically mean, self-centered or disagreeable." <ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jerk#Etymology_1</ref>. As stated in the quote above, Chris believes that all men to be cruel, selfish, and overall unlikeable. Therefore, he views almost all men as jerks.
</blockquote>
;[[Jerkop|jerkop]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. An official of the law.

<blockquote>''I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a prepared speech to say to them stupid '''Jerkops'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Get-Tar_Region</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris views most officers of the law as jerks, due to how often they'd thwart his LoveQuest, the term is a portmanteau of "jerk" and "cop". Possibly a pun on the word "jerkoff", which is defined as being "a contemptible man". <ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/jerk--off</ref></blockquote>

;JULAAAAAAAY
<blockquote>''(interjection)'' 1. An expression used by Chris to indicate how much he'd love having sex for the first time with [[Julie]]

<blockquote>"Oh, Julie...'''JULAAAAAY''', JULAAAAAAAAAAY!!!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first shouted this infamous CWC-ism in the video [[For Julie's Eyes Only]], which he intended to share with only [[Julie]] to show what their first date would amount to, despite this breaking his Three Date Rule. Seeing how Chris was somewhat of a porn junkie,<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_Adam_%26_Eve_purchases</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Miyamoto_emails#Chris_Sets_the_Record_STRAIGHT</ref>, Chris must have picked up that during sexual intercourse, one of the people may shout the name of the other person in order to "spice up" the orgy. After the video got leaked, the term started to be used by trolls humorously, to the point where [[weens]] started using the phrase in excess, making the CWC-ism lose its luster.</blockquote>

</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== K ==
|-
|
[[File:Autistic Kicks Back.png|200px|thumb|The autistic kicking back!]]

;[[Kick the Autistic]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' America's favorite game

<blockquote>''I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC!"''' *sigh*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any action which involves doing something to Chris that he doesn't like

<blockquote>''And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC"''', then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#21_January</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' Any form of discrimination towards Chris for being [[autism|autistic]].

Origin: Chris had this paranoid idea that the whole world is going against him and his goals, solely due to his [[autism]]. In this sense, the fact that so many people supposedly wanted to thwart his goals made him feel like he was being "kicked" around.

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== L ==
|-
|

;[[Laughs Under Lucricities]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(backronym)'' backronym for "LULZ"

<blockquote>''Although, F.Y.I., "LULZ" is short for "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''"''<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris knows "lulz" is a variant of "LOL" and that it does not actually stand for anything, although he seems to think it must be written in all-caps anyway like an acronym. Originally he would simply say "LULZ" ''ought'' to stand for "Laughs Under Lucricities," but he soon began implying that it already does.<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2008|Email]] from Chris to Robert Simmons V on 12 August 2008</ref>

2. ''(noun)'' Any form of humor made at Chris' expense

</blockquote>

;lesbian soul
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' What Chris believes to be his true [[Chris and sexuality|sexuality]].

<blockquote>''I am an all-around, good natured, high-functioning autistic, Female '''Lesbian Soul''', and Transwoman, artist, gamer and creative type.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;level-up king
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Master of Pokemon, and possibly other card games.

<blockquote>''There must have been about 6 people including Chris and myself at the tourney and when he won he was jumping up and down a yelling "I'm the '''level up king'''!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mimms_and_Lucas_Q%26A#Follow_up</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before his permanent ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]], Chris would play games of Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh with some of the other customers. Despite his sick obsession with both games, Chris never developed any type of strategy to compete with other players, making it very difficult to succeed at the game, even when he played against small children. Eventually, when the shop was just down to six people, which included Chris, the manager, Mims, and Lucas, Chris did win a match against a relatively new player, and excitedly jumped up and down at this accomplishment like a child. Along with this, he shouted the phrase "I AM THE LEVEL-UP KING!"</blockquote>

;like, you know
<blockquote>1. ''(discourse particle)'' Space filler during sentence.

<blockquote>''I don't want too much conflict to happen, '''like, you know'''. You wouldn't want too much conflict to happen, like, you know. I mean-like, you know, between you and him any further. Yeah.''<ref>[[I Love You Kacey]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Love Quest]]
<blockquote>1.''(noun)'' Chris's on-going search for a sweetheart.

<blockquote>''As for Wes, I blame all of these happenings on him. If he had not taken my life-long friend away from me, I might have a Pretty Girlfriend today. And I would not have had to set out on endeavoring '''LOVE QUEST'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In its context, the term Love Quest, makes sense, as a "quest" is defined as "a search or pursuit made in order to find or obtain something".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/quest</ref> In Chris's case, he's trying to find a significant other in order to solve all of his problems.</blockquote>

;lovehog
<blockquote>1.'(noun)'' A lover in a relationship between two [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Also, I have finished the drawing for you, and I have shown off the Original '''LoveHog''' Couple's Wedding Rings, and their three children: Cerah Rosey, Robbie Sonee and (Shiney Rosey) Christine Rosey.''</blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehog".</blockquote>

;lucricities
<blockquote>1. ''(pl. noun?)'' lurid acts or motivations (?)

Origin: Chris completely made this word up, presumably based on "lucrid," which may in turn be based on the actual word "lurid." According to Chris, the word "lulz" can mean either "Laughs at my expense" or "Laughs under lucricities," so presumably the two contexts are equivalent.
</blockquote>

;lucrid
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' obscene, profane, wicked
<blockquote>''And promoting the hatred, and...drawing such loose—such '''lucrid''' mockeries is not gonna further the story plot or have anything new created, or even gonna help in any way...''<ref name=csm>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Possibly a corruption of "lurid," given the context. Alternatively, it might be a corruption of "ludicrous." Chris has used this word to describe the homoerotic/dickgirl art on the ED page, as well as the fan comic in which he was depicted as a man-baby.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== M ==
|-
|
[[File:Mass_Debate.jpg|right|thumb|Massive Debating]]
;make one's own peeps n' poops

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to urinate and deficate at the same time

<blockquote>Uh, actually, uh, actually Crystal is uh, doing, is uh, doing her preschool homework, and uh, Reg-, and Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' babychild! '''Made his lil' peeps n' poops'''! And he went, and he went weewee all over the bathroom.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/PlayingHouse</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a clip of Family Guy, where Herber the Pervert is letting his dog out to "make his pees n' poops". <ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtlwEfZEmrg</ref></blockquote>

;mass debate

<blockquote>1. (adjective) to pleasure one's self; to masturbate

<blockquote> "I've actually done it ['''mass debating'''] to myself so many times, even with a hunk of - even with an inflatable plastic woman..."</blockquote>

Origin: This particular euphemism comes from Chris's tendency to refrain from using inappropriate language, as well as his unusual variation of a southern accent combined with a minor speech impediment.</blockquote>

;[[Manajerks|manajerk]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a store manager

<blockquote>''And then these two guys- and then these two '''manajerks''' approached me.''</blockquote>

Origin: A portmantau of "manager" and "jerk". </blockquote>

;mashed potato grenade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[Wikipedia:Stielhandgranate|Stielhandgranate]], a special German hand grenade with a handle.

<blockquote>"I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my '''mashed potato grenade''' could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed fro murder."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2013_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a Facebook post sent to [[Megan Schroeder]] accusing her of his ban from the [[Game Place]], where he [[Chris and reality|makes paranoid claims]] of what she, [[Mimms]], [[Lucas]], and [[Snyder]] were thinking that day. A corruption of "potato masher grenade", a common English nickname of the Stielhandgranate<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stielhandgranate</ref>.</blockquote>

;mental block

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' mental disorder; a disorder which inhibits normal functioning.

<blockquote>''And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And, after the stress from some of the people—people at PVCC, as well as my '''mental block''' [mimes punching himself in the head] of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir—approach the girls like I used to.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Chan%27s_Public_Announcement</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to his [[autism]] as a "mental block", soley due to how it keeps him from socializing with girls. In reality, a mental block is the inability to remember a specific thing. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_block</ref></blockquote>

;mislabel

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to put a label on Chris or any of his creations in a way he doesn't like, regardless of truth
2. ''(noun)'' a label of such slanderous nature; see also "misunderstanding"
<blockquote>''I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE '''Mislabeling''' than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again? ''<ref>[[Common Questions#1_February_2010]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Just about everywhere. He appears to use this term as often as the word "slanderous". Curiously, the redundancy "ill-mislabeling" (as if there were any other kind) has appeared once.<ref>[[CWC Blog#28_December_2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;misspeak

<blockquote>1.''(verb)'' to lie

<blockquote>''Sometimes, I have '''misspoke'''. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. Hand to God. And on my Bible. I'd have to go look for it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/ToJackie</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Instead of accepting that someone has called him out on [[Lies|his bullshit]], Chris prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this ploy.

</blockquote>

;misunderstanding

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a deliberate view that contradicts Chris; see also "mislabel"
<blockquote>''*AND WE WILL NOT TAKE THE '''MISUNDERSTANDINGS''', THE MISLABELS, AND ALL THE LIKE SITTING DOWN!!!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Issue_9/Page_39|2=Issue 9 Page 39}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misappropration. Note that it is not, as in reality,<ref>[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misunderstanding Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "misunderstanding"]</ref> a mistaken notion (alternatively a dispute) based on faulty information, but a malicious action worthy of [[tard rage]]. Apparently a slanderous troll has to actively "misunderstand" Chris. Also, Chris has used the related word "misunderstood" (participle adjective) as an insult, not realizing that if the troll misunderstood (transitive verb) him, ''Chris'' would be the one that was misunderstood (participle adjective).<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Rosechu_the_transwoman|Mailbag 39]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;modnar
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' random

<blockquote>''I may be '''modnar''', but I try not to be offensive, and if I do, then I am sorry. I can not please Everyone.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Random", spelt backwards.</blockquote>

;[[Monthly tugboat|monthly tugboat]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's Social Security Disability Service

<blockquote>"I'm getting by livin' with my folks and a '''monthly tugboat.'''"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Monthly_tugboat#References_by_Chris</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently coined the term "Monthly Tugboat" due to a comparison he makes between gaining money through his SSDS vs. winning the lottery. In his mind, winning the lottery is like riding a "Luxury ship that can easily sink", while gaining money from the government is the same as getting cargo from a ship pulled by a tugboat. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/BlueSpike_Skype_Logs_12</ref></blockquote>

;[[Muscle bra|muscle bra]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A sports bra used for covering a man's chest.

<blockquote>''And you know what, I highly recommend this to every dude who goes around shirtless: wear a '''muscle bra'''. Because nobody, and I mean nobody wants to see your dog-gone ugly pecs, they're so ugly and repulsive, ugh... creeps everybody out.''</blockquote>


|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== N ==
|-
|

[[File:CWCcomeuppancemedallion.JPG|thumb|Shiver me timbers!]]
;[[naïve]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb, lacking intelligence.

<blockquote>''You are such a cowardly, '''naïve''', retarded, individual.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers</ref ></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only seems to understand the most simplified definition of the word. In general terms, the word "naïve" is defined as "showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment."<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/naive</ref> However, in Chris's mind, the word is used to "question one's intelligence". Despite his distaste for the use of the word on him, this turns out to be a commonly used insult by Chris.</blockquote>

[[File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg|thumb|Chris travels to France]]
;navy
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' semen.

<blockquote>''You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''navy''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Play on words, i.e, a navy is a collection of seamen/semen.

''See also: [[CWC-isms#C|Comeuppance]]''
</blockquote>

;NEARLY SAME
<blockquote>1. ''(Adjective)'' Similar.

<blockquote>''And so I killed about killed about twenty miles round trip for gas to go find her house. But it turns out that was a troll posing as that girl. [sighs] THE VOICES SOUNDED '''NEARLY SAME'''.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;neutral
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' platonic.

<blockquote>''I apologize, but I meant the term '''neutrally''', and I never meant anything from that.''<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And One More thing, Darling!... Talluah Bankhead would be Insulted with your response to the term's '''neutral''' usage. Hmpf!'<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes words like "darling" and "dear", are gender neutral terms. Because of this, he assumes that if he claims that he used it in a "neutral" way, people will know he's not using the term in a romantic tone.

</blockquote>

;[[Niggo|niggo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An African-American person.

<blockquote>''Where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggos'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Julie_Reveals_Herself</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bastardization of the racial slur "nigger". This butchering was done after [[BlueSpike]] forced Chris to say: "''BILLY MAYS is the new mayor of CWCville, and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers''". Chris decided to repeat this phrase, but decided to "outsmart" BlueSpike by replacing "niggers" with "niggos".</blockquote>

;[[Nombie-zazis|nombie-zazis]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' zombie nazis

<blockquote>''Anyway, as for the medical study, and this will require your aid, Magi-Chan. In June of 2015, the scientists have found the gene-like molecule which makes a person turn...ugh..'''nombie-zazis'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Son10revp3.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacement for homosexuals and homosexuality in the revised [[Sonichu 10]].</blockquote>

;not-troll
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a victim of trolling.

<blockquote>''Consider who does more harassing, which do you block? <ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-278#post-2549629]]</ref>
<blockquote>
*Every Foul-Mouth Troll
*The '''Not-Troll''' they follow</blockquote>''</blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's mind, only two types of people exist on [[the Internet]], those who are trolls, and those who are victims of trolling. Because the person being trolled is supposedly '''not''' a troll, they are a "not-troll". Chris eventually deleted the aforementioned post, and reposted it, replacing "not-troll" with "victim" to clarify what he was referring to in the first place.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-279</ref></blockquote>

;[[Noviophobia|noviophobia]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the fear that someone you want to date is already dating someone else.

<blockquote>''His one fault, that has restricted him from finding the Ms. Right, he had a major case of '''Noviophobia''', where he is afraid to even approach most ladies, because he thought that they were all already paired up with “A Jerk.”''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_News_Dash</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Because Chris was so frustrated with so many [[CWC-isms#J|jerks]] stealing his potential mates, Chris decided that his envy and hatred of men was a real phobia. Thus, overconfident in his ability to speak [[Spanish]], formed the word "noviophobia" by using the Spanish word ''novio'', meaning "boyfriend", and the English suffix, -phobia, meaning fear . </blockquote>
</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== O ==
|-
|
[[File:Axels2.jpg|thumb|right]]
;OH! MY AXELS! (or OW! MY AXELS!)
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of pain in one's axles (the central shafts of rotating wheels or gears in a machine).

<blockquote>'''''OOOHHHHHH!!!! MY AXELS!!!!!'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Written for [[Ghostbusters|Ghost Buggy]]'s cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], based upon the character's tendency to complain about its aching mechanical components.</blockquote>

;old-fashioned<blockquote>
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Racist.

<blockquote>''But still, call me '''old-fashioned''' but, I'd rather be- I would not- I'd uh- I'd definitely wouldn't uh... NOT BLACK. Not black.''<ref>[[Mumble_4]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' Opposed to miscegenation.

<blockquote>''I mean '''Old Fashioned''' as in the Classic white-marry-white type of thing.''<ref>[[Mailbag 37]]</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' Homophobic.
<blockquote>''My father is '''OLD FASHIONED'''; he NEVER gives thought to homos, and he HATES them too.''<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

4. ''(adjective)'' Dating back to the 1980s.

<blockquote>''Ah, you can tell this is an '''old-fashioned''' Lego set on account of this—the old-fashioned "LegoLand" on the corner.''<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref></blockquote>

5. ''(adjective)'' Preferring real women over waifus.
<blockquote>''Nothing against waifus and the people who have them, but I Never Really understood the appeal and concept of making out a character from a show who is Dimensions Away from your own league to be any sort of a significant other to you. I’m more '''old-fashioned''' towards real women.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/954587249622077440</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;ounce of vagina

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Essentially Chris's way of saying "I'll at least lose my virginity at some point".

<blockquote>''And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one '''ounce of vagina''', I have your number, and you're going down!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Attention_All_Sonichu_Fans_(NOT_HATERS)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref> Which, after an encounter with a girl named [[Mia Hamm]], may be true...[[Virgin with rage|or not]].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 6th, 2008]]</ref>
</blockquote>
;outercourse
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the act of fingering

2. ''(noun)'' a handjob

<blockquote>''I understand. You may or may not have had much exposure to sexual images as I've had, so the idea of a "hand job" (which was the act drawn there) as part of '''outtercourse''''' [sic]'' (versus intercourse) was a surprise to you.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_2008#Chris_thinks_she_was_scarred_because_she_doesn.27t_know_much_about_sex</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "outercourse" is essentially another way to refer to dry humping.<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/outercourse</ref> In Chris's mind however, outercourse simply refers to sex which involves touching each other genitals, because they happen outside of the body.

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== P ==
|-
|
[[File:MPSGotReal.jpg|right|thumb|Shit just got real!]]
;parkay
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an epic style of running

<blockquote>''Hello there, fans! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the Sonichu franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do a '''parkay''' from this point all the way down to the gara--parking garage where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Edge</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], Chris calls his style of running "parkay". Chris confused his running as a form of parkour, an acrobatic sport typically used in the military as a means of practicing the navigation of a complex environment without the use of equipment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkour</ref>. Given Chris's [[Speech Impediment]], the word "parkour" somehow came out as "parkay".
</blockquote>

;[[Parody|parody]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any work that "borrows" characters, plots, or styles from other pieces of fiction, whether infringing International [[Copyright]] Law or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the Sonichu Comics, except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise '''parodic'''.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:Issue_8_Cover.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of what constitutes as a parody most likely stems from his interest in shows like [[Family Guy]] and [[Wikipedia:Robot Chicken|Robot Chicken]], both of which use copyrighted characters and make jokes around them. In his mind, because those shows can get away with using such characters, that gives him an excuse to do the same thing in his comics. Ironically, Whenever Chris spots an actual "parody", he thinks that the characters from the original work are being defaced.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Parody#Chris_does_not_understand_the_concept_of_parody</ref></blockquote>

;peanut
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who disregards you, or otherwise does not accept you for who you are.

<blockquote>''So you enjoy it, just do it—don't worry about other people's opi—pinions. Because, uh, compared to the other schools, those people who disregard you are just total '''peanuts'''. And I'm not talkin' Charlie Brown; I'm talkin' 'bout the little nuts after the shells. The real peanut gallery. That would be peanuts, wouldn't it?''<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Apparently derived from "[[Wikipedia:peanut gallery|peanut gallery]]," a term used to describe the hecklers in an vaudeville audience who would throw peanuts at a performer. Chris's own spin on this concept is to dismiss such hecklers as being insignificant like literal peanuts.
</blockquote>

;[[Pedofork|pedofork]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pedophile.

<blockquote>''I am not a '''pedofork''', you DORKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "pedophile" and "dork". Coined in Chris's [[Madman Rising]] video, in response to the trolls who were comparing him to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herbert_(Family_Guy_character)| Herbert the Pervert] from Family Guy.</blockquote>

;[[Pickle|pickle]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A penis, particularly one of [[JERKS|any man that isn't Chris]].

<blockquote>''Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu, Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' '''PICKLE'''!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Chrisreply3.PNG</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "pickle" is one of the few hundred slang words for the word "penis".<ref>https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/PenisTesticlesSlang.pdf</ref> It is unknown why Chris prefers to refer to the penises of other men as "pickles", while he calls his own his "duck", but it may have to do with Chris's sexual insecurity and the fact that he legitimately hates actual pickles <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_4#Why_Chris_hates_pickles</ref>, whereas Chris thinks he's special enough to have a cutesy name for his own penis.</blockquote>

;[[Pmurt]]

<blockquote>1. ''(proper noun)'' President Donald Trump

<blockquote>''EID '''PMURT''' EID!!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Eid,_Pmurt,_Eid</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Donald Trump's last name, but spelled backwards. In Chris's first usage of this CWC-ism, Chris mentioned how "Trump spelled backward is "Pmurt", which sounds like "hurt"".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2016_Facebook_posts#Registered_to_vote</ref> This is because of Chris's strong hatred for Trump, despite showing very little knowledge about [[Chris and politics|America's political system]]. Chris also reversed the name because to him, reversing someone's name will degrade and weaken them. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L</ref>In his eyes, if he repeats this word again and again, people will start turning against Trump and start voting for [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary]], which, unsurprisingly enough, never happened <ref>https://www.nytimes.com/elections/results/president</ref>.</blockquote>

;poetry
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Something which causes awe.

<blockquote>''Soon, the chill will come, and the skies setting into darkness; it's like '''Poetry''' in the truest motion."<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-8-21-crescent-eclipse.33504/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown
</blockquote>

;poke
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''Anyway, eclectic! High on the hedge and high on the hog. You want some of this '''poke''', mon?<ref>[[CWC address to Royal Board]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended as a demonstration of what "Soni-Chew the Eclectic Heeedge Hog Poke Mon of London, England" would sound like. A coded reference to Pokémon.
</blockquote>

;[[Prickly-Wicklies|prickly-wicklies]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Punishment for insulting or harming Chris; essentially Chris's word for karma.

<blockquote>''War gets you '''prickly-wicklies'''... as well as punches.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Warm_Fuzzy_Tale</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the Children's book, [[A Warm Fuzzy Tale]].

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#F|fuzzy-wuzzies]]

</blockquote>

;[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]

<blockquote>1. ''(backronym)'' The headquarters of several Sonichu villains.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: The name itself is a backronym of the college Chris attended, [[PVCC|the Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. After experiencing several mishaps throughout his college experience<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_English</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_college</ref>, the dean giving him the cold hard truth about why his [[Love Quest]] is doomed to fail became the straw that broke the camel's back, and Chris thought it would be a smart idea to deface the college afterward in his comics.</blockquote>

;prowldent
<blockquote>1. ''(???)'' Unknown.

<blockquote>There's no quote to cite this from, just a logo in which Chris gives the name "Prowldent Virginia Community College" to [[PVCC]].<ref>[[:File:ProwldentVCC.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely combining connotations of "prowl" and "dent" (either to leave an indentation or [[fangs|teeth]]).
</blockquote>

;Pu Tuhs!
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Shut Up!

<blockquote>''SHE; my Ariel Starter was Female from the start, so '''Pu Tuhs!'''''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Q ==
|-
|

;q-sand
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Short for quarter sandwich (i.e. a quarter of a sandwich).

<blockquote>
''So, mom ignored her and ate the '''q-sand''' in front of her.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 31]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Appeared in an [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail]] sent to [[Jackie]] dated August 5, 2011. Most likely unnecessarily used as a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]] abbreviation.
</blockquote>

;quarters
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An office space; headquarters.

<blockquote>''Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her '''quarters''' and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_Wikipedia_profile</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The way Chris uses the word "quarters" in this case makes it sound like Chris is being forced to go join the military, as in this context, the word "quarters" refers to the housing of a military personnel and their family.<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/quarters</ref> Considering that Chris already viewed [[Mary Lee Walsh|Mary]] as a [[Mary Lee Walsh#Mary Lee Walsh in Sonichu|supervillain]] scheming to [[Virginia is for Virgins|end all love in Virginia]], he most likely meant to refer to Mary's office as her "headquarters", but thinks that one's headquarters are the same thing as one's "quarters".

2. ''(noun, pl.)'' coins, no matter their origin or worth.

<blockquote>''Uhh. I want a soda, but it takes only C '''quarters''' and I only have W quarters. Do you have any change?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The first time this word was used in such a strange way was in [[Sonichu 9]], where it is revealed that [[CWCville|CWCville's]] currency is made up of "C-quarters" and "W-quarters". According to this issue, 10 C-quarters, make up a single W-quarter, which ultimately defeats the whole concept of the "quarter" coin. Strangely enough, despite being a part of the United States, CWC-ville still issues this strange form of currency, along with US dollars. Possibly to make this strange connection make somewhat more sense, Chris decided to refer to his currency as "quarters".

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== R ==
|-
|

[[File:ReldnahcTheRapier .jpg|thumb|Reldnahc the Rapier]]
;[[Raincoat|raincoat]]
<blockquote>1. (''noun'') a condom

<blockquote>''You ARE the woman...we gotta stop by Wall-Mall-Wart on the way for a "'''raincoat'''".''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "raincoat" is actually an archaic slang for the word "condom".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/raincoat</ref> Given that Chris has been raised by two geezers his whole life, and that part of his childhood has consisted of [[Gilligan's Island|old TV shows]], Chris thought that people would understand what he meant when he states that his Mary Sues are having protected sex with a raincoat.</blockquote>

;[[Random-access humor|random-access humor]]
<blockquote>1. (''noun'') non-sequital humor.

<blockquote>''Punchy grew up in a dojo, where he perfected his punches. He is also full of '''random-access humor'''. He lost his tail in a brutal fight.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP5.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his brain is completely random, and it always spews out incoherent garbage. In his mind, this works in the same way a computer processes random-access memory. <ref>Fhttps://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#Crossing_the_Na.C3.AFve_Line_.281:46:21-1:52:41.29)</ref>

</blockquote>

;rapier
<blockquote>
1. (''noun, attributive'') rapist, sexual assailant.

<blockquote>
''Now! My '''rapier''' friend, I would very much like you to get off me, please.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly a pun. Chris-Chan Sonichu calls [[Reldnahc_Notsew_Naitsirhc#Fictional_biography|Reldnahc Ha-Taque]] [[Chris-chan Sonichu#Transexual|his/her]] "rapier friend" in [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]] after Reldnahc tackles him/her to the ground in a suggestive pose and touches his/her chest, thus (in Chris's hyperbolic mind) "raping" him/her. He could also be using the externally attested definition, as an adjective meaning "witty"<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rapier#Adjective</ref>, metaphorically referring to a kind of thin, sharp-pointed sword.
</blockquote>

;[[Reality Cartoon|reality cartoon]]

<blockquote>
1. (''noun'') The universe.

<blockquote>
''Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a '''reality cartoon'''.''<ref>August 2017 tweets#"Life is a cartoon"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris's life revolves mainly around [[Vidya]] and cartoons, it would make sense to him that the most believable explanation for the universe and everything in it is that it's all a cartoon. Likely related to Chris's known belief that [[Chris_and_reality#Fictional_characters_and_media|all fiction actually exists in alternate universes]].
</blockquote>

;realistic

<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') realated to live-action.
<blockquote>
''Ah! Going for something '''realistic'''. Awesome.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, taking everything he sees at face value, possibly believes live-action shows actually happen.</blockquote>

;[[Recycling|recycling]]

<blockquote>1. (''verb'') the act of one ingesting their own semen to preserve their sperm count.

<blockquote> I '''recycle''' my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009</ref> </blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having very little knowledge of how the male reproductive system works, thinks that men can run out of sperm from masturbating or orgasming too much. Fearing the loss of "potential children", Chris actually thinks that by ingesting the sperm back into his body, his sperm count will stay in balance, thus, he is "recycling" it.

</blockquote>

;[[Reeb|reeb]]

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') beer or any other alcoholic beverage of the like.

<blockquote>''Then he glugs his '''reeb''', heh-heh, and then he conks out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, thinking he's so clever, decided to censor any mention of the word "beer" in his comics, by spelling the word backward.</blockquote>

;Resident-Evil refrigerator

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') The refrigerator in the previous Chandler Household.

<blockquote>''Kitchen very much blocked off all over... with the '''Resident Evil refrigerator''' right there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to the fridge as the "Resident Evil" kind, because in Japan, the game ''Resident Evil'' is known as ''Biohazard''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref><ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resident_Evil</ref> Considering the quality of the household, that name may very well fit the description of the fridge in the state it was in before filming the [[Tour of Chris's House II|Second House Tour]].</blockquote>

;[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]]

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') The female counterpart of the [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon]].</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Rosechu of CWCville, [[Rosechu]]. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the last name of the ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' character, Amy Rose, and "Raichu", the Evolved form of a Pikachu.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== S ==
|-
|
[[File:Wild Snergen Flergen.jpg|thumb]]

;salty
<blockquote>1 ''(adjective)'' to show more maturity or coarseness than is expected, especially knowledge of [[honest]] topics like [[Chris and sex|sex]].

<blockquote>''Ah, but I am not the weak person they think I am; I am much, much '''saltier'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon a line from "Bowling Girls", ninth episode of ''[[Excel Saga]]'': "But I'm not the sweet little girl I was a few minutes ago! I'm much, much saltier now!" "Salty" in this context derives from naval lingo, since the most experienced sailors would have greater exposure to both the saltwater seas and worldly experiences.
</blockquote>

;[[Scale of Respect|scale of respect]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his respect for other people.

<blockquote>I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my '''Scale of Respect''' each by 2 points<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Scale_of_Respect</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, like most other autistics, tends to view the world based on numerical values due to their lack of understanding of certain abstract concepts such as respect. Because of this, Chris made his very own numerical scale to decide on who should be respected, compared to who shouldn't.</blockquote>

;self-epic
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' describing a situation which is epic, and at the same time related to Chris and his various clones.

<blockquote>''And I will square-off in the TRULY '''SELF-EPIC''' Battle between me, and my Dark Half.''<ref>[[An Important Update]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;shitful
<blockquote>1. '(adjective)'' hurtful; defamitory.

<blockquote>''And this is the last time I will ever say anything in response to your '''shitful''' and hurtful comments and hatred for Hate's Sake!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2014_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Shitful is a vulgar slang word, synonymous with words like "boat-load" or "truck-load". Chris may have seen the "shit" part of this word, and assumed that the word is meant to be used for specific situations that seem "shitty" to him.</blockquote>

;[[SLGBTQ]]

<blockquote>1. ''(acronym)'' an extended acronym for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender).

<blockquote>''Considering your logo there, Texas will be feeling more love from the '''SLGBTQ''' community; give us props and Love, Lone Star State.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2017_tweets#Hurricane_Harvey_and_SLGBT</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first used this acronym, he didn't explain what groups the "S" or "Q" were supposed to represent, making plenty of people confused. Eventually, Chris revealed that the "S" represents '''s'''traight and cis-gender people, while "Q" represents "'''q'''ueers" or "'''q'''uestioning people". Chris believes that if he included straight people into LGBT, then those particular people would feel more invited to join into the community. Considering the fact that gay people are minorities, adding the "S" to LGBT only defeats the entire purpose of identifying people as LGBT in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a mentally handicapped person

<blockquote>''And finally, after a hard "odd" day, he rides home on a bus, but unfortunately, it had a few "'''slow-in-the-minds'''" on it.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;slow-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' mentally retarded

2. ''(adjective)'' gullible

3. ''(adjective)'' loss of train of thought

</blockquote>

;SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase one may shout out when asked for attendance.

<blockquote>'''''SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P6.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An obvious example of Chris's [[CWC-isms#R|random-access humor]]. This strange phrase appeared in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], when the cast was asked for their attendance during a [[CWC-isms#D|Dating Education]] class. When [[Wild Sonichu]] was asked for his attendance, he blurted out this phrase as Chris's many attempts to be funny in his comics. Given Chris's childish sense of humor, it would make a whole lot of sense for him to include a character randomly blurt out a nonsensical phrase out of nowhere.</blockquote>

;snooze cruise
<blockquote>1. a long period of slumber

<blockquote> ''Next, he had Trigonometry...I'd hate to be Christian when his nerves kicked into action after waking up from a "notey" '''snooze cruise''', but I was.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the school report [[A Week With Christian Chandler]]. Given the time this report was written, Chris picked up this phrase up from ''Sonic Adventure''.

</blockquote>

;somecummpentydifferent
<blockquote>1. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce a change in subject.

<blockquote>''Anyway and now for somecummpentydifferent stay tuned for '''somecummpentydifferent''' — a bunch of good pushups!''<ref>[[Getting Foam Ed]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce use of [[random-access humor]].

<blockquote>''And now for '''somecummpentydifferent'''. BUUUUNG! And now it's Monty Python's flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, Greeg, why is people running away.''<ref>[[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Note this is the very first thing he says, so there's nothing to be completely different ''from''.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is trying to say "And now for something completely different" like John Cleese does on [[Monty Python]]. Suffice to say Cleese's ability to say three multisyllabic words in rapid succession exceeds that of Chris.</blockquote>

;[[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]
<blockquote>1. (noun) The male counterpart of the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Sonichu of CWCville, Sonichu. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the name of the titular character of ''Sonic the Hedgehog'', Sonic, and "Pikachu".</blockquote>

;soo
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Very, Very much.

<blockquote>''Dear Blanca, I am '''soo''' happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be''<ref>[[Chris's Letter to Blanca]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In writing, Chris often adds extra o's to the word "so" to prolong the "o" sound and show added emphasis. However, where most people would add two or more o's, (e.g., "I love you sooo much!"), Chris frequently only adds one, resulting in "soo," which makes the word look like it's supposed to be pronounced "sue". This has the (unintentional?) effect of mimicking the speech patterns of a Valley Girl or an effeminate homosexual.

This may originate from pamphlets published by [http://www.channing-bete.com/ Channing Bete], [[Autism|short and uninformative]] self-help pamphlets often handed out at churches, the last page of which often feature a summary headlined by "Soo…" Given his distrust of help from anyone other than [[Rocky]], it is not entirely impossible that Chris has read Channing Bete pamphlets occasionally.

This is one of many recurring jokes in the [[Sonichu Audiobooks]] in which the narrator pronounces words like "soo" as they are literally spelled, instead of how Chris intended them to be read.
</blockquote>

;soup beds
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Homeless shelter with beds

<blockquote>'' I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have '''soup beds'''. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS!''<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris tries to distill his "soup hotel" idea into its two components, but he mangles one of them by retaining the "soup" prefix.
</blockquote>

;sourdough region
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The crotch area

<blockquote>Its weak point is still the '''sourdough region''', but it would take FIVE KICKS to get to it<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_4_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown</blockquote>

;spike on one's shoulder
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' refers to the act of holding grievances towards someone.

<blockquote>That was, that was, that was misunderstanding, that was just, there was a whole bunch of misunderstandings between me and my employer, and he, and he has, and he had, and he had, and he had a '''spike on his shoulder''' against me.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A confusion with the phrase "chip on one's shoulder".</blockquote>

;sticky dream
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A wet dream

<blockquote>''After falling back asleep Chris had a "'''sticky dream'''."''<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris claims that a "wet dream" actually refers to wetting one's bed as opposed to nocturnal emission.
</blockquote>



;[[Sub-Episodes|sub-episode]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The side stories in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: A result of Chris' strange [[Chris and English#Television jargon|television jargon]] in his comics.</blockquote>

;sumbah
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Minced oath for "son of a bitch."

<blockquote>''Yo, Christian, thanks for saving my sister from that crazy '''sumbah'''''<ref>[[Sonichu Special 4]], page K-4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Probably based upon "sumbitch."
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetbolt|sweetbolt]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used by [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Ahh..that salad was great! What's wrong '''sweetbolt'''?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A sweetheart.

<blockquote>''I understand, and I will NEVER put it against you. Yes, as your '''SweetBolt'''. :)?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>





|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== T ==
|-
|
[[File:Duck Pounding Some Tom-Tom.jpeg|thumb|A duck pounding some tom-tom real hard]]

;teenages

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The 13-19 age group; teenage years.

<blockquote>''Ahem... hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all '''teenages''', as well as the, uh, gals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's [[Future Message]], he attempts to talk down to just about every age group. In order to do this, he starts his video off with the quote above. Chris clearly couldn't think of a way to refer to teenagers, so he decided to refer to such people by "teenages". A butchering of "people of all ages".</blockquote>

;telekinesis

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Telepathy, i.e. communication through long distances, usually via psychic or supernatural means.

<blockquote>''I’ve been communicating with her through '''telekinesis''', and she sounded very lonesome.''<ref>[[Silvana]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas tele'''kine'''sis means ''moving'' objects from a distance with psychic powers (c.f. ''[[wikipedia:kinetic energy|kinetic]]''), Chris has never used the term properly. [[Magi-Chan|Psychic]] [[Silvana|characters]] in the [[comic]] have both powers of telekinesis and telepathy, but Chris has only used the former to refer to both.
</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|tobacky]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' tobacco or tobacco products

<blockquote>''If I could, I would take every last ounce of '''tobacky''', put 'em on a rocket, and shoot 'em up to the Moon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris hated the act of smoking cigarettes so much that even uttering the word "tobacco" made him feel uncomfortable, so he created a new retarded sounding word to avoid saying the actual word.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref></blockquote>

;tom-tom

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia.

<blockquote>''MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR '''TOM-TOM''' TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from the short Adult Swim music video, ''Pound my Tom-Tom'', which served as the intro to the cartoon, ''Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil''<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DVoH0Njow</ref>. Considering Chris barely understands anything adult, the fact that this was meant to be a bad euphemism, which the character, Lucy, used to avoid directly mentioning her vagina, flew over his head.</blockquote>

;[[Tomgirl|tomgirl]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male who is into girly stuff; apparently, in Chris's mind, this goes all the way to [[Tomgirl Pictures|make-up and crossdressing]].

<blockquote>''I am '''Tomgirl'''.''<ref>[[:File:I_am_tomgirl.jpg|PSN comment as of 6 April 2011]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: analogous to "tomboy", i.e. a girl who likes boy-stuff.

</blockquote>

;too many crooks

<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of dissatisfaction with an overabundance of evildoers.

<blockquote>''Well, call it--this was "too many crooks." '''Too many crooks!''' Too many crooks! And that ED page is one of those crooks.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon the idiom, "too many cooks spoil the broth," although that idiom means something, whereas this is just an incomplete sentence.
</blockquote>

;triage

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' ménage à trois; a romantic relationship between three people.

<blockquote>''Magi-Chan Sonichu, Silvana Rosechu & Mewtwo / A Loving '''Triage'''''<ref>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A corruption or misspelling of "triad", possibly influenced by the ending of "ménage". "[[wikipedia:Triage|Triage]]" is a real word with a completely different meaning and unrelated etymology.
</blockquote>

;trollin' stupid

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Very stupid, in a manner pertaining to trolling.

<blockquote>''Because that's what you deserve, you God damn womanizing raping... '''trollin' stupid''' pickle suited... nigger!''<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to have coined this phrase for his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend"]] lyrics with "trollin'" serving as an intensifier along the lines of "fucking."
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== U ==
|-
|
[[File:Uncouth Twat.png|thumb|Most uncouth!]]
;ugly growth

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to refer to his own penis negatively.

<blockquote>''"Did I not just tell you I am Seven Inches Long?! It is soo long, that I am literally able to stretch it Under my taint, and tuck it between my own ass cheeks, beyond my ass hole. With help, I can literally even shove the head of the '''Ugly Growth''' Up Mine!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_2</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Un-clit|un-clit]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A piercing Chris got on his perrinium as an immitation clitoris.

<blockquote>''It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my '''un-clit'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Un-clit</ref></blockquote>

Origin: During his Tomgirl years, Chris was, and still is, very desperate to gain female body traits such as bigger breasts, wider hips, a fully functioning vagina, etc. In order to get a part of the work done, Chris got a piercing on his taint as a sort of pseudo-clitoris, showing more of Chris's limited knowledge of female anatomy. </blockquote>

;uncouth
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' unlikeable, lacking good manners.

<blockquote>''And, by the way, among which, You give the Males a Most Terrible and Horrible Name in your behavior. Most '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_1</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Trump is most Immature, '''Uncouth''', and Not Valid to be president.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Misc_E-mails#Anti-Pmurt</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I felt it appropriate to change my profile photo back to the filtered one for what happened in France the while back with due respect of the continuing of Trump's most drastic and '''uncouth''' actions in office.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/January_2017_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''You, sir, are '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#Trump.2C_you_mocked_the_mentally-challenged</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''All of you are nothing but immature, borish, '''uncouth''', and damned Neanderthals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonic_Boom_Protests#Chris_Rages_On</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Not Sexual Fantasy; Friendships, You '''Uncouth''' Cad. Hmpf!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Unleashing_his_inner_Brit</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And as it Had been My fault on that #NationalGirlfriendTweet that started the whole mess, that was Why I chose whole-heartedly to Harass Me instead of Doopie or Anyone Else who was being harassed with the mis-content from Years Ago from me taken Out Of Context, Mind you, because Harassing Anyone at Anyone else’s Expense is Just Plain Wrong, Bullying, and '''Uncouth'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_tweets</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''And it was ignored by you that Talulah Bankhead coined the term for Tabitha, you '''Uncouth''' Twat.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Tabitha_addresses_CWC_flame_war</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I agree it is shameful of these people to have accounts just to haze at me and all others, Soo '''uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NightStar2891_tweets#Twitter_spam_for_Tabitha</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I miss Jessica. You Trolls Scared Her Off by either Hacking or Reporting her Facebook. You '''Uncouth''' Cads!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jessica_Quinn</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As demonstrated, Chris uses this word way more than any 21st century [[American]] would. Chris picked up this word from an MLP episode, where Applebloom and Applejack are talking about what the word "uncouth" means<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-SrQ-Oz1k4</ref>, seeing how this conversation alone is somehow a staple in the Brony subculture. Seeing how Chris is one of those many Bronies who sees more [[Night_Star#Chris_spills_the_beans|meaning]] in the show than it actually possesses, Chris picked up this term due to how foreign and smart it sounded to him.
</blockquote>

;unto
<blockquote>1. ''(preposition)'' Archaic or poetic form of the word "to".

<blockquote>''Now that it has been made fully clear to me, I am now able to devote myself fully '''unto''' you, Julie.''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''I am very devastated, due to my SHATTERED HEART that [[Mary Lee Walsh|XXXXX]] caused '''unto''' me!.''</blockquote>

Origin: Another one of Chris's autistic ways of sounding smart, possibly in imitation of the Bible. (c.f. ''[[Chris and hypocrisy|Do unto others...]]'') Chris uses this form more frequently than most English speakers of the 21st Century should, even when it sounds unwieldy.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== V ==
|-
|
;vaginatables

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia

<blockquote>''There is no quote to cite the use of this CWC-ism''</blockquote>

Origin: A strange hybrid of the words "vagina" and "vegetables". Used in Chris's e-mail adress "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/China#Vaginatables</ref></blockquote>

;vege-marmite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Vegemite

<blockquote>''Certainly not a '''vege-marmite''' sanwich. Lol''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-372</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A retarded pun made by Chris to state his distaste for veggie marmite. Coincidentally, vegemite is essentially marmite, yeast extract from brewing beer turned into a pungent, salty paste, with vegetables and spices added in.<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegemite</ref></blockquote>

;vestite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A transvestite person.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and '''Vestites'''; ID as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the above post, Chris intended to write the words "transgender" and "transvestite" in the same sentence without duplicating the trans suffix. He did so by adding a space between the prefix and the respective endings.</blockquote>

;[[Virgin with Rage|Virgin with rage]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An individual who is sexually frustrated

<blockquote>''Tell me why
I'm stuck as a '''virgin with rage'''!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/So_Need_a_Cute_Girl</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Even after allegedly having sex with [[Mia Hamm]], the idea of being a virgin and not having a sweetheart pushes Chris's buttons. This gets so bad, that he might even rage after he's lost a potential sweetheart.</blockquote>

;[[Virginia is for Virgins|Virginia is for virgins]]

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase that pushes the strange idea that the citizens of Virginia won't allow Chris to get any china solely due to his autism.

<blockquote>"'''VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS''', NOT LOVERS!"</blockquote>

Origin: A butchering of the phrase "Virginia is for Lovers". Apparently, this strange idea has started since attending PVCC, with him leaving attraction signs everywhere, only to have all of them destroyed by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] afterward.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Virginia_is_for_Virgins#Origins</ref>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== W ==
|-
|

;Walter Grisby
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A man's name often employed in acts of random-access humor.

<blockquote>''"Is this '''Walter Grisby'''? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what? DAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"''<ref>[[Random-access humor]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The retconned name of the character formerly known as [[Wes Iseli]].

Origin: Unknown; thought by some to be a reference to the Cartoon Network show ''Ed, Edd n Eddy''. A character in the PC game ''The Sims 3'' goes by the name of Walter Grisby, but the game's release post-dates Chris's first uses of the term by some years.
</blockquote>

; Warroir of Love
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an advocate for spreading love and peace.

<blockquote>''"People! You do not understand! By Not blocking the Trolls, you are Promoting Hatred; They don't always side with Love. I Am '''Warroir of Love'''."''<ref>[[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/902236285389111297]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misspelling of the word "warrior". Chris considers himself a "warrior of love" because he believes that he is the [[Chris and kindness|voice of kindness]]. Most likely derived from the derogatory term "Social Justice Warrior", a term used for individuals who advocate for social justice and equality.
</blockquote>

;well-breasted
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Having large breasts.

<blockquote>''And her image dawned upon me in my imagination, starting out as the '''well-breasted''' pink electric-hedgehog (Pok'emon) with the long Raichu-like tail, I drew her outfit onto her in red and Battery-Charged Blue.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Rosechu|CWCipedia article on Rosechu}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusion between "well-endowed" and "large-breasted".
</blockquote>

;[[Women's rights]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The right for women to strip down without interference.

2. ''(noun)'' The right for women to not be depicted with a [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]].

Origin: Chris's understanding of sexism is botched up beyond belief. Chris believes that sexism only consists of any type of aggression or abuse towards women, and that it doesn't involve any kind of unfair depiction of women, like that all women like to strip down to their bare bodies and that all they care about is sex, shopping, and cooking.

</blockquote>

;wooden nickel
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Acoustic guitar.

<blockquote>''I got the idea of the challenge from him COPYING me playing Boston's "More Than A Feeling" on Guitar Hero on his old '''Wooden Nickel'''; if he wants to copy on Guitar, he may as well be challenged in a Sing-Off.''<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In real life, a wooden nickel is a now defunct form of currency used during the Great Depression. His use probably refers to the phrase "don't take any wooden nickels" - that is, he is calling the acoustic guitar a semi-worthless imitation of his Guitar Hero controller.
</blockquote>

;worse
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Severely; extremely, in an adverse manner

<blockquote>''IMHO, having Seinor Citizens for Parents throughout your whole life is no picnic; they are '''WORSE''' Overprotective.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
|-
|
;wrath
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Great [[Chris and anger|anger]] or rage. Considered one of the [[Chris and religion|Seven Deadly Sins]].

<blockquote>''Apparently, my, uh, heed of warning towards Vivian has gone unheard or otherwise SHE DID NOT REALIZE THE FURY OF MY '''WRATH'''''<ref>[[Sign Destruction Video]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Strength sufficient to lift an office chair.

<blockquote>''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY '''WRATH'''!!''<ref>[[Power]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==X==
|-
|
;X2-checking
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Double Checking
<blockquote>''Just '''X2-checking''' if you got the drawing I left you.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-35#post-2511049]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Comes from x2 meaning times two, which means double to Chris.

</blockquote>
;XXXXX
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' censorship of the word "bitch"
<blockquote>''Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM VERY ANGRY AT THAT '''XXXXX'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Diary</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Chris's only instance of this peculiar censorship is in his [[diary]]. In it, Chris repeatedly refers to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as an "XXXXX", clearly as a censorship of the word "bitch". Why Chris chose to replace all of the letters in the word with the capital letter "X", instead of using asterisks remains a mystery.</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Y ==
|-
|
;y'all
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(pronoun)'' indicating second person plural.

<blockquote>''"'''Y'all''' are free to stay here in one or so of their bedrooms for free, and y'all get fed too. Consider this a second chance for a good life which Christian offers to y'all; seek good employment after y'all get your strength rebuilt. ... I'll go check y'all in, then I have to finish saving the world."''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_68|Issue 10 Page 68}} [[Ultra Sonichu]] to the [[Basement Rosechus]], on a '''single page'''</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''It would be appreciated if '''y'all''' can book the flight for me, because I'm unsure about my family's current financial status, and my social's being saved for my own bills.''"<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga]] </ref></blockquote>
Origin: Derived from "you all", originating from the dialect of the Southern United States (and found in [[niggos|black communities]] outside the South). Often considered substandard English, Chris even uses this in formal written situations. Also overused in the [[comic]] to the point of absurdity.
</blockquote>
|-
|
;y'all should know me by now
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction to complete strangers.

<blockquote>'''''Y'all should know me by now''', but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, back on March 17th, 2000.''<ref name=csm/></blockquote>
Origin: His second message on YouTube, addressed to the ED trolls. He would use it several more times after this, possibly making this into his tagline. The introduction is made under the assumption that Chris is [[Chris and his Ego|already well-known]].
</blockquote>

;young at heart

<blockquote>1. ''(noun, attributive)'' An individual with childlike characteristics; a childish person.

<blockquote>''I am '''Young at Heart'''; a concept I have kept within myself since childhood.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''We, the '''Young at heart''' stand alongside our Liked and Cared others.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris can't seem to tell the difference between being a child at heart, and being childish. In his mind, people who are considered childish actually lead a more exciting life, since he believes that more childlike people are willing to show off their [[kindness]] and are generally more eccentric. In reality, adults who are "young at heart" generally have a somewhat innocent outlook of life and are generally interested in things considered suitable for children, yet understand their responsibilities as adults.
</blockquote>
|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Z ==
|-
|
[[Image:ZapToTheExtreme.png|thumb|200px]]
;zap to the extreme

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Go out and be brave.

<blockquote>''Go! Sonichu! Go out and '''zap to the extreme'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 0]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''Now everyone stay green and go out and '''zap to the extr-r-r-r-r-eme'''. Have a lovely day.'' <ref>[[A New, Fun Trick!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase is first used on the cover of [[Sonichu 0]], where Chris's mary sue character tells Sonichu to "zap to the extreme" as if Chris and Sonichu were in a bona fide [[Pokémon]] tournament. Chris would then end up using this phrase time and again, usually completely out of context of its original meaning.
</blockquote>

;zapbud

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A fictitious flower found in the Sonichu canon; Rosechu's favorite flower.

<blockquote>''Oh, Rosechu, you are as beautiful as a rose, though a '''Zapbud''' is the flower that heals your woes.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Ode_to_Rosechu</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Essentially the result of Chris attempting to create a mythology around his Sonichu comics, Chris created some of his own flora as well. Because of how "zapping" seemed to be a very common theme in the earlier issues of Sonichu, Chris thought about naming his flora after this one theme.

2. ''(noun)'' a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Yes, my blossoming '''zapbud'''. That's why we are here.''<ref>[[Sonichu 0]]</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

==References==

<references/>

{{CWC-isms}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

CWC-isms

2018-07-12T14:05:56Z

MindHit: Fix typo a, added a file

<center>{{Honest}}</center>

One of [[Chris]]'s most notorious features is his strange vocabulary. Like many children who don't feel comfortable referring to [[Honest Content|adult concepts]] directly, Chris often resorts to creating cutesy euphemisms for a lot of words that anyone else his age would generally use with little reservation, which is common with autistic people. While some of them are understandable — after all, nobody would really relish discussing their [[Butt garments|diapers]] — others, such as "[[tobacky]]" instead of "tobacco", only serve to turn an otherwise normal sentence into an advertisement for Chris's childish nature. Others are attempts to be clever that fail miserably, for example, he refers to [[semen]] as "[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|navy]]", because semen sounds like sea men, [[Random-access humor|get it?]] Combine this with the idiosyncratic speech patterns that are common among [[autism|autistics]], and you get his so-called '''CWC-isms'''.

CWC-isms may be combinations or butchered versions of words or phrases that already exist, entirely new words, commonplace words that he uses repeatedly in a peculiar or obsessive way, or entirely new phrases that Chris often has to explain afterwards because nobody knows what he's talking about.

==Primary categories of CWC-isms==
There are 5 main types of CWC-isms:
# '''CWC-neologism''' - a ''new'' word or phrase, which didn't exist before, and was first ''created by Chris''. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#L|Lovehogs]]'', a portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehogs".
# '''CWC-euphemism''' - a ''preexisting'' word or phrase, which Chris for some strange reason gave a ''totally different meaning'' than it was meant to. Example: ''[[Duck]]'', meant to denote a bird, Chris uses it to denote his penis.
# '''CWC-anachronism''' - an ''obscure'' word or phrase which Chris has learned somewhere and now likes to utter pretty often, and which ''became characteristic'' for Chris's way of speaking/writing. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#I don't care for|I don't care for smth.]]'', a phrase Chris uses almost every time he expresses hate for something or someone.
# '''CWC-misspelling''' - only the ''most notable'' of Chris's ''misspellings'': those, which became characteristic for Chris's way of writing. Example: ''[[Geinus]]'', what he deems himself to be.
# '''Other shit''' - or Miscellaneous.
These 5 Main Types of CWC-isms are here to help you determine, if a word or phrase is a CWC-ism. If it fits the first 4 types, it most probably is. If it doesn't, it most probably isn't. Only the most important and notable of exclusions go into the 5th Type.

__NOTOC__

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; center:0">{{Alphabet ToC}}</div>

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==#==
|-
|
;[[4-Cent Garbage]]
<blockquote>
1. (''noun'') The headquarters of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4-Chan]] trolls in [[Sonichu]].

<blockquote> ''You will recognize her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of '''4-cent-garbage''' will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

|}

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==A==
|-
|
;abreast
<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') full of; filled with.

<blockquote>''It was not until after saving the city from the forces of Count Graduon and his minions, that she realized her form's new assets. And she was '''abreast''' with delight and glee when she found not the Male Part, but a Vagina! grin emoticon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2015_Facebook_posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''In fact, while I am fairly educated about Tribadism and '''abreast''' with theories, I would appreciate some experience with a lesbian or two who knows what she likes to enlighten me better, including on sensual massage and all that.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2015_Facebook_posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Like with many other words he isn't so familiar with, Chris uses this word in order to sound smart, failing to realize that the word "abreast" actually means "adjacent" <ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/abreast</ref>. A possible confusion with the word "abound".</blockquote>

;Adult Swim
<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') pornographic or otherwise "NSFW"; containing [[Honest Content|adult content]].

<blockquote>''She still has a great drawing style, even for the '''Adult Swim''' section."<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/night-star-delivers-christines-side-of-the-story.33062/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refers to the Cartoon Network block, [[Adult Swim]]. Chris seemed to only consider the "Adult" part of this block's name, and therefore assumed he could use this phrase to describe anything that's "adult" to him.

</blockquote>

;adulterous
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Of an [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|adult]] and mature nature

<blockquote>''Originally it was supposed to be like, you know, like ages 7 and up, but then I end up going to the content, uh, it could be considered, be like, be like definitely be considered '''adulterous'''.''<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: usually used to describe people who [[Ivy|cheat]] on their [[Blanca Weiss|partners]] (i.e. guilty of adultery), Chris only notices the "adult" component of the word.

2. ''(adjective)'' Insult of unclear nature
<blockquote>''Heeeeey, folks! It's me, [[Clyde Cash]]. I am the ruler of the internet and the internet trolls. I am an '''adulterous''' foe, a bastard and a self-righteous idiot who spends his time wallowing and trolling the one Christian Weston Chandler, and making up a whole bunch of dadgum rumors all over the internet!''<ref>[[100 2267]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris simply throws out the insult without a clear understanding of the word. Possibly referring to Clyde taking [[PandaHalo]] from Chris, though this is more aptly described as cuckoldry.

</blockquote>

;an' anurr thing
<blockquote>
1. ''(Phrase, transitionary)'' Signifies that Chris wishes to make another point about a subject he is discussing, and that he wishes he were Peter Falk.

<blockquote>''An' anurr thing...CHRIS. Your for real- your real name, as I have been told by Kacey, is only Chris Chandler! No "-tian," no "-topher," just Chris! So, admit that. '''An' anurr thing''', I NAME is NOT IAN! BRANDON!!! SOMETHING!!!!!''<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: a corruption of "and another thing". Used constantly when Chris is angry.

</blockquote>
;[[Anchuent Prophecy|anchuent]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Anything that is archaic in the ''Sonichu'' canon.

<blockquote>
''Well, what's this? I'm havin' an upgrade? Huh! Huh! My- my powers are given me the ability to fly with my wings attached to my head! It's like a w- it's like an add-on! That's optional! Huh! Must have been done by '''Anchuent''' Powers, so awesome I can fly now! Huh!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially, "anchuent" was taken to be a misspelling of the word "ancient" given Chris's [[Chris and English|poor grasp of the English language]]. Over time, however, it was revealed that "anchuent" was meant to be a portmanteau of the words "ancient" and "Sonichu", adding the "chu" part of "Sonichu" into the word "ancient". <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook</ref> </blockquote>

;and such
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items; to add to a list.

<blockquote>''At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera '''and such'''.''<ref>[[CWC Blog|Cwcipedia captain's log, 25 November 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris understands the term's meaning, but uses it superfluously.
</blockquote>

;artery

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' art.

<blockquote>''Good evening, but between this and the, uh, oh, and the other clips I would like to present you, uh, a few examples of hand '''artery'''.''<ref>[[CWC - Hand Drawn Original]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Not to be confused with the term for blood vessels. Chris doesn't seem to realize "art" is already a noun and doesn't need the suffix.
</blockquote>

;as such

<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' In the manner previously described.

<blockquote>''They just hated me because they don't, they did not understand people with autism. And so they tortured me '''as such'''.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris overuses this phrase to the point of self-parody. He's either tacking it on to fill space when he can't think of the next thing to say, or he's peppering it into his language in a feeble attempt to sound intelligent.
</blockquote>

;[[Attraction Location|attraction location]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any place Chris may sit to gain the attention of any passing women, only to get promptly kicked out afterward.

<blockquote>''Also, as of early November, I was reemitted into the Fashion Square Shopping Center, and since Mid-December, I totally left the UVA as an '''Attraction Location'''.
''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having a very difficult socializing with women, thought that sitting around in a certain place and soliciting himself would be a better alternative. Therefore, it would make sense to him to sit in a location with many people in order to gain the attention of several women. </blockquote>

;attraction time

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The time that is spent at an attraction location

<blockquote>''Then, on my next visit to the mall, I felt seriously depressed about what had happened the other day; it killed my '''attraction time'''''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;audio-sonic feeling

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the arousing feeling caused by getting hit by sound waves

<blockquote>''Here is a most '''audio-sonic feeling'''. While at the club last night, the music was loud, maybe reverberating or echoing. The music and beats literally shook up my rack! I actually Felt the music playing and reverbing within my breasts, almost like my breasts had become a pair of speakers. It Felt Amazing and Arousing!
''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/cwcville/photos/a.447204945915.244245.167832525915/10152771303590916/?type=3&theater</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As shown in the quote above, Chris believed that he was experiencing arousal through feeling the soundwaves on his body. In actuality, sound, a vibration<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound</ref>, creates pressure. The higher the amplitude of this wave (The louder the sound), the more pressure gets created from the wave, thus a louder wave should be able to hit Chris given that he's a huge target, and it creates that "arousing" feeling, which is actually an alternation between high and low pressures, which hits his body.</blockquote>

|}

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== B ==
|-
|

;B-dog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Derogatory epithet for women.

<blockquote>''Then that [[Mary Lee Walsh|'''B-Dog''']] ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Retarded censorship of the word "bitch". [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is implied to say this in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], when she shouts "BEEE..!!!" at [[Silvana]].<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_8/Page_95|Issue 8 Pages 94-95}}</ref>
</blockquote>

;bally
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' round; having the texture of a perfectly round ball.

<blockquote>''I've always given her a "'''Bally'''-Scratch" where I stroke her head with all five fingers like as if I was gently squeezing a rubber ball.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2004-2006</ref></blockquote>

Origin: If one didn't know Chris was referring to his dog, Patti, and that he gives her a "Bally-scratch" on the head, one might conclude that he's fondling someone's genitals. Chris, [[CWC-isms#N|naive]] to how suggestive this sounds, gave this special kind of petting the name "Bally-scratching" because of how stroking her head felt like he was squeezing a rubber ball.</blockquote>

;Be Woman
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Be '''a''' woman.

<blockquote>''I am a Lesbian Transwoman; I am not confused or mentally ill about that; '''I Am Woman.'''''<ref>[[2017_tweets#Proud_to_be_a_feminist]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''How Dare You Insult and be so Inconsiderate of Her like that? '''She Is Woman'''; she would Never Revert Back.''<ref>[[NightStar2891_tweets#She_is_woman]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used regularly when Chris asserts his [[Tomgirl|transgender identity]], notable for the consistent lack of a proper article and capitalization of each word in the phrase. Originally only attested in the first person ("I Am Woman"), a post on Chris's [[Miss Night Star]] Twitter sockpuppet account uses the third person ("She Is Woman"). Technically first appears in [[Sonichu 8]] when [[The Incredible Lioness]] attacks [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], as the somewhat cliché musical reference [[wikipedia:I Am Woman|"I am woman, hear me roar!"]], which may have inspired Chris's broader use of the phrase.
</blockquote>



;[[Biological clock|biological clock]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Wikipedia:Circadian Rhythm|circadian rhythm]]

<blockquote>'''I have a lot of stored caffeene [sic] in my energy supply, and not only kept me on my toes, but has also messed up my fucking '''biological clock''' as well.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Biological_clock</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although technically not used incorrectly in this context, the phrase "biological clock" is used exclusively for women in their child-bearing years. Possibly a confusion with "internal clock".
</blockquote>

;blangry
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' [[Chris and anger|Angry]].

<blockquote>''Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''BLANGRY'''! ''<ref>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Given Chris's belief that he has [[Chris and English|mastered the English language]] and his [[speech impediment]], it's likely he fucked up saying angry.
</blockquote>

;blue-printed
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Skilled in engineering.

<blockquote>''I like many others, was born a foal; to a '''blue-printed''' Pegasus and a country tomboy earth mare.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot_20171019-235945_01-png.299275/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris portrayed Bob's Pony Counterpart in [[Sonichu 12-9]] as an engineer, just like the real [[Bob]]. Due to Chris's limited vocabulary, Chris knew very little words he could use to describe Bob's profession. Derived from the word "blueprints", the plans set for the design of a product. </blockquote>

;[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Single; particularly used on women.

<blockquote>''Ahh, well, it's been over a year and ten months now since I started my sweetheart-search; I still haven't found a '''boyfriend-free'''-caring-smoke-free-non-alcoholic-white-girl-near-my-age to build a relationship with from the ground up.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;Buddha belly
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Excess fat that gives a person a [[obesity|very round appearance]].

<blockquote>''Okay, well, I admit I do have a '''Buddha belly''', but I am not lazy, I do get out and about, I exercise, I jog and work out, and I eat healthy.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Buddha|Buddha]]" is a title given to several legendary figures in [[Wikipedia:Buddhism|Buddhism]]. In this case, Chris is making reference to [[wikipedia:Budai|Budai]], who is often known as "Fat Buddha". Chris presumably picked up the phrase from the [[Family Guy]] episode "To Love and Die in Dixie."
</blockquote>

;buh bye bay nose
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' but if anybody knows.

<blockquote>''If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in da bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose''' the whereabouts of the... [[JERKS|jerk]]... and just happens to be nearby... or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.''<ref>[[Christian's Update 13 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
;[[Butt garments|butt garment]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' adult diaper; typically one used to control Chris's [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontenence]].

<blockquote>''The doctor corrected that they were liners; he never called them diapers. Neither did Chris- he called them “'''butt garments'''”.''</blockquote>

Origin: To avoid embarrassment from stating that he shits himself constantly, and uses diapers, Chris refers to his adult diapers as butt garments.
</blockquote>
|}

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== C ==
|-
|
[[File:CWCtrek1.png|400px|right|thumb|The Autistic Generation]]

;C-Log
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Captain's Log.

<blockquote>'''''C-Log''' February 4th, 2010. First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make.''<ref>[[I am Alive]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;C Ville (or C-Ville)
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' [[Charlottesville, VA]].

<blockquote>''Look, you're going to back in '''C-Ville''' tomorrow, I can meet you at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes, what time is good for our meeting?''<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Generic term for any city whose name fits the pattern of beginning with "C" and ending with "ville," e.g., [[CWCville]], Charlottesville, etc.

<blockquote>''And when you diss Cwcville you disf- you diss every "'''C Ville'''" within these United States.''<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;[[Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The typical opening for a vlog video Chris makes to adress the fanbase, which includes the date of production.

<blockquote>'''''Captain's Log'''. Stardate: September... 24th, 2008.''</blockquote>

Origin: One may come to the conclusion that Chris may have picked up this phrase from Star Trek, however, Chris is not a fan of the Star Trek franchise, nor has he seen any clips of the show<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_3</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_14</ref>. It is more likely that Chris must have picked up the phrase from cartoons like [[Family Guy]], which references Star Trek, considering how he watched the show religiously.</blockquote>

;carniverous
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' evil, vengeful.

<blockquote>''On today's show, we will take a close-up look at the '''carniverous''' jerkops.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic5P29.htm</ref></blockquote>Origin: A misspelling of "carnivorous". It is unknown what word Chris meant to use here, but "carnivorous" certainly wasn't it.</blockquote>

;[[China|china]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Female genitalia

<blockquote>''I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, uncomfortable with directly saying the word "vagina", decided to alter the word to a cutesy, similar-sounding word.</blockquote>

;coldest shoulder

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' to rebel.

<blockquote>''Those people like me at the very least, NOT counting all of the deceitful people I have had the displeasure of knowing who turned '''Coldest Shoulder''' Against me and STARTED all of the Online Hatred.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/April_2012_Facebook_posts</ref>

''One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time Manajerks who gives her elders the '''coldest of shoulders'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Coffee_Place</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the phrase "turning a cold shoulder", a phrase used for the negligence of another person<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/turn-a-cold-shoulder-to</ref>. </blockquote>

;[[Comeuppance|comeuppance]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Male orgasm.
<blockquote>''...I feel my '''comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my [[semen]] is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop. (...) And right after I'd given you my first round, my first '''comeuppance''', you would take, you would reach down, and you would take your face away from my penis...''<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' [[Semen]], usually immediately after ejaculation. ''See also: [[CWC-isms#N|Navy]]''
<blockquote>''Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first dosage of my '''comeuppance'''!''<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses the sexual slang "cum" as a [[For Julie's Eyes Only|verb]] for orgasm, but he may not realize it can also be a noun referring to ejaculate. In his mind, "comeuppance" apparently serves that purpose, viz., "that which has come/cum up."

In the real world, "comeuppance" is an English noun meaning [[Wiktionary:comeuppance|outcome which is justly deserved]] based upon the common verb "come," i.e., the state of coming forward to receive judgment. He is either unaware of the original definition of the word or does not appreciate the irony of telling women he's going to give them comeuppance.

Note that the contexts of the real word and Chris's version are different. When a woman is rebuked, she receives her comeuppance; when a woman gets Chris's hot load in her face, she receives ''his'' "comeuppance."
</blockquote>

;crooks
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Those who may steal Chris's intellectual property for malicious purposes. ''(pl.)''

<blockquote>''I aways keep my eyes open for '''crooks''' who take my [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]]'s name and put it in offensive use!''<ref>''[[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg|116-CWCCop.jpg]]''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' websites, and even words on websites which communicate lies about Chris.

<blockquote>''And that [[ED]] page is one of those crooks. Every page--every word on the discussion page is a '''crook'''.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A finishing move Chris does on his adversaries in order to "curse" them, public or otherwise. Performed in the same way it is in Dragonball.

<blockquote>''Hmmm...'''Curse-ye-ha-me-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NO_D***_WAY,_IMPOSTOR!!!</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes that he possesses [[Chris and reality#Magic|magical powers]]. Typically, these so-called magical powers would be used whenever an enemy gets in the way of whatever he wants to do, since Chris is too afraid to actually fight anyone. Therefore, he will rely on this magical power in order to gain control of whoever is giving him trouble.</blockquote>

;CWC-sense
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The ability to sense Chris's presence.

<blockquote> ''Seriously though, awesome timing coming in, just as we, and Chris, had just finished writing the lyrics...was your '''CWC-sense''' tingling?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== D ==
|-
|
[[File:Daupdate.jpg|thumb|400px|[[Megan]], comparing Chris's [[Chris and his Ego|attitude]] to [[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]].]]

;D.A.
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Unexplained, presumably a substitution to avoid the word "dumbass." Most likely ''not'' "District Attorney," although equally applicable to [[Marvey Blaziken]].

<blockquote>''You are obviously a troll trying to pick on my nerves; nice try, '''D.A.'''''<ref>[[Mailbag 15]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris intermittently decides to self-censor his profanities for the benefit of younger readers.
</blockquote>

;da
<blockquote>1. ''(article)'' [[Wikipedia:Eye dialect|Eye dialect]] spelling of the word [http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the the].

<blockquote>''Y'all know me as [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta Sonichu]], '''da''' DJ with da power!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], page 43</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris writes "the" as "da" when he intends for his characters (or himself) to sound laid-back and cool. This is most notable with Jamsta Sonichu, who is supposed to sound like a hip radio DJ and/or a [[Niggos|black man]]. Chris may intend at times to do the same thing in his verbal communications, although his [[speech impediment]] makes it difficult to tell when he actually means to say "da."
</blockquote>

;Da Update

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The latest news.

2. ''(phrase)'' The most recent fail Chris is responsible for.

<blockquote>''Hey, guys! What's '''da update'''?''</blockquote>

Origin: Dialogue used by Chris, in an exceedingly awkward attempt to sound casual, in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. As Chris's [[fans]] have searched the Internet for the latest news from our hero, "da update" has become shorthand for "the latest [[Relics of Fail|failure]] Chris has committed." The phrase became legendary when posted above the Chris-chan talk page on [[ED]] (eventually the page was locked, forcing mass migration to the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]]).

</blockquote>

;[[Darling|darling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used on female friends to obtain their love and trust.

<blockquote>Thank you, Doopie '''Darling'''. :)<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2017_tweets#Thanks.2C_darling</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, so hellbent on being [[Chris and kindness|kind]] to just about any [[CWC-isms#N|not-troll]] he meets, thinks it would be appropriate to refer to women he doesn't know outside of the internet by pet names to sound like he really cares for them, despite it being creepy to most other people. Chris's main justification for using this word on women who don't bond with him is that the actor [[Wikipedia:Tallulah Bankhead|Tallulah Bankhead]] used this word a lot, ignoring the fact that she only does this while on set.</blockquote>

;[[Dating education|Dating Education]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' formal education in schools about dating people of the opposite sex.

<blockquote>''Also, in addition, while we also fully support Sexual Education in every high school, Christian Weston Chandler also highly recommends, and would gladly support, '''Dating Education''' classes, because, while Sex Ed is great for the eventual, well-earned intercourse after 3 or more dates, it is vital to learn what to do before that moment. It should be well0taught how to approach and ask one’s member of the opposite gender out for the very first date.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:DatingEducation.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The lack of "Dating Education classes" is something that Chris used to complain about all of the time, because he's simply incapable of finding a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]], and that it would be a great advantage for people of his type to learn how to obtain some [[CWC-isms#C|china]]. Chris doesn't understand that [[Chris and socialization|the way he behaves around people]], especially those [[Women|of the opposite sex]] has anything to do with it, and therefore should see a therapist to correct his socialization skills.</blockquote>

;detail
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A thing of importance that Chris cannot recall at any given moment.

<blockquote>''I do not have the appropriate calm state of mind to make time to READ those numerous upon numerous small-print '''details''', much less memorize them.''<ref>[[Wikipedia#May 2009 drama]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' Something that Chris does not understand.

<blockquote>''There was one I remember from then where the essay had a lot of offensive content, including smoking, and I spoke my mind on how offended I was of it. Plus other details I misunderstood that he was expecting in the assignments.'' <ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ability to retain information is questionable (unless it's about [[Sonichu (comic)|something]] [[Lego|he]] [[Pokémon|obsesses]] [[PS3|over]]). As such, he "misunderstands" and "forgets" a lot of glaringly important things, such as [[Father call|how to live on his own]] and [[Jackie E-mails 2|the fact that he cheated on Ivy]].
</blockquote>

;Did the do, to do the do
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To have sexual intercourse, likely under deceptive conditions

<blockquote>''[[Lovely Weather|Lovely]] was hot. She mistook me for myself and we went home from work that night, so Lovely and I '''did the do''', and it was awesome!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_2|Issue 10 Page 2}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Childish alteration of the common euphemism for sex, "doing it". Ripped off from [[Wikipedia:Emission_Impossible|an episode]] of [[Family Guy]].
</blockquote>

;dige
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''My name's [[Inos]]... wha' chu up to? I am eclectic on this hedge... high on the hog... you wan' som' of this '''dige''', mon?''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_70|Issue 10 Page 70}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended to be part of a coded reference to "Sonichu, Electric Hedgehog Digimon". It is not known why he changed the reference from "Pokemon" to "Digimon".
</blockquote>

;[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Used as a reference to Chris's fecal incontinence.

<blockquote>''I have NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF '''DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/IRC_(20_January_2009)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase during an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]] with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]] after they alluded that Chris has a fondness to wear women's underwear. In order to confirm his straightness, he retorted by admitting the fact that he has "NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS". Soon after, due to how humorous the phrase sounded, it became a shorthand for trolls to refer to Chris's fecal incontinence.</blockquote>

;disabled of crafting
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Too apathetic to work

<blockquote>''Since last December with the Lulu.com problems (resolved), that has left me with a bad emotional and mental scar. Leaving me feeling '''disabled of crafting'''...''<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy to work]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris being defensive when a customer asked how he could be trusted to follow through on an order, when he had failed to send out orders from his Etsy shop, which resulted in his seller account getting closed.
</blockquote>

;Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Backstabber

<blockquote>''You could be a Better, More Supportive Friend, instead of a '''Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic''' with your sweetheart!!!''<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-10-5-mad-at-kim-wilson.34948/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A butchering of the title of the Adult Swim cartoon, [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]].</blockquote>

;[[Duck|duck]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's penis

<blockquote>''MY '''DUCK''' HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially "duck" was taken to be a typo of "dick" since the "u" and "i" keys are close together. It was later revealed that Chris was using this negolism as an intentional euphemism to refer to his own penis.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mumble_8</ref>

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]]</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== E ==
|-
|

;elbow-greased

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Earned from hard work and exercise

<blockquote>''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism. It appears in his [[resume]], where he lists "elbow-greased strength" as one of his "functional skills"''</blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the idiom, "elbow-grease", a figure of speech humorously used for tasks that involve manual labor only. </blockquote>

;[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]''

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the characters found in Sonichu which are hybrids of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] characters and/or Pokemon.

<blockquote>''Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the '''Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon''' on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_resume</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Despite the name, a majority of "Electric Hedgehog Pokemon" are neither Pokemon or hedgehogs. This misnomer may come from Chris's original characters being hybrids of two Sonic characters, both of whom are hedgehogs (Sonic and Amy Rose) and two Pokémon (Pikachu and Raichu).</blockquote>

;emotional differences

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A strong disagreement between two people.

<blockquote>''I told you! It was, it was because of, uh, '''emotional differences.'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#The_Shit_Hits_the_Fan</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris mentioned that he got terminated from [[Wendy's]] in the [[Father Call]], due to their "emotional differences", possibly meaning that a heated argument between him and his employer ensued.</blockquote>

;empirical
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' resorting to experience to gain knowledge rather than through scientific means.

<blockquote>''So, throw away the book talk; be '''empirical''' and believe what you know is fact'' <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2012_Facebook_posts#Empirical</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris attributed the nearly opposite definition of the word to Jeremy Hilary Boob PhD, a character from [[Wikipedia:Yellow Submarine|''Yellow Submarine'']]. Considering this, Chris must have picked up this strange definition from the content in the Beatles Edition of ''Rock Band''.</blockquote>

;entendre

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Charisma or attraction

<blockquote>''Too much '''entendre'''?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the phrase "double entendre", a figure of speech used for words or phrases with a double meaning, [[Duck|typically]] [[Raincoat|with]] [[Mass Debating|one]] [[China|of]] [[Recycling|them]] [[Pickle|being]] [[Comeuppance|risque]].<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double%20entendre</ref> In English, the word "entendre" isn't typically used outside of the phrase itself, but in many other languages like French and Catalan, it is understood to mean "to hear" or "to understand". Chris, thinking he knows everything there is to know about the English language, once again thought he would sound smart by using this obscure word.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== F ==
|-
|
[[File:Fourboom.jpg|thumb|right|"G'Day welcome to Auschwitz"]]

;[[Fangs|fangs]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's canine teeth

<blockquote>''They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like '''fangs''' of a vampire, dog or something to me.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls#Your_understanding_me_fukky_.281_January_2009.29</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes his teeth to be unordinary compared to most other people's teeth. Because he believes his teeth to be menacing, he gave them the name "fangs". Once in a while, Chris would show off his decaying teeth to scare off his enemies. This usually works, although for the wrong reasons.</blockquote>

;faredoo
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection, imperative verb)'' Parting salutation, akin to "goodbye".

<blockquote>''Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. I bid you fond...'''faredoo'''. Adieu. Fond farewell adieu...''<ref>[[The MovingFoward videos]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Accidental portmanteau of "farewell" and "adieu".
</blockquote>

;fart-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb and perverted 

<blockquote>Ha Ha! Take THAT, you '''fart-minded''', jerk MALE among ALL fart-minded, jerk Males that make up the Majority of the Worldwide Male Population! -:D<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtWQTjXCDs</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the comment section of a Stopmotion Lego animation, where a ''Lego'' minifigure is in a sexual relationship with a ''Lego Friends'' minifigure. Throughout this video, the minifigure acts as what Chris believes most men to be like. At the end of the video, the Lego minifigure proceeds to fart, which disgusts the Lego Friends minifigure. Also a possible butchering of the phrase "brainfart", which is used to humorously refer to a moment of absentmindedness</blockquote>

;firstly
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' A word that indicates that Chris is about to tell someone why he's right. Often not followed by an enumerated list of reasons, despite the implication.

<blockquote>'''''Firstly''', Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills. and I'm High-Functionally Autistic''<ref>[[IRC_(02_January_2009)|IRC chat, 02 January 2009]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Use of "firstly" to begin a list, rather than "first," is a matter of dispute among linguistic fags. "Firstly" has fallen out of common use and tends to sound more formal, perhaps overly so. Chris seems to like this formality, probably because he thinks it sounds smart.
</blockquote>

;fondful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' fond

<blockquote>''Faithfully yours with '''fondful''' thoughts; Chris Chan.''<ref>[[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007|Chris's email to Megan Schroeder]], 06 July 2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently doesn't understand that "fond" is already an adjective by itself.
</blockquote>

;for good-like
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' final, but with the imagined possibility otherwise.

<blockquote>''And in June of 2008, he banned me from the store '''for good-like'''.''<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails|Chris's email to The Wallflower]], 18 February 2010</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusing modification of "for good".
</blockquote>

;foundate
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To dedicate, as in a monument or building.

<blockquote>''I, Christian Weston Chandler, re-'''foundate''' this monument that is the PAGE with MY SOLE HONEST TRUTH from my sound mind and heart.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#Captain.27s_Log.2C_Stardate:_June_6.2C_2009|2=Christian in his Own Words}}.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely a portmanteau of "found" and "dedicate", or a bizarre attempt to convert "foundation" into a verb.
</blockquote>

;four-boomerang-shaped symbol
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' minced oath for "[[Wikipedia:swastika|swastika]]," especially the ''Hakenkreuz'' symbol of the Nazi Party.

<blockquote>''Like Most People, I do not care much for Adolf; he was a terrible man, and even in jest, I WOULD NEVER want to portray him, much less, his '''four-boomerang-shaped symbol''' (I know what it is called, but I do not wish to type the word).''<ref>[[Mailbag 5#That wacky Hitler|Mailbag 5]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris was apparently afraid to say the word "swastika," probably for the same reason he used to fear using racial slurs.
</blockquote>

;[[Fuzzy-wuzzies|fuzzy-wuzzies]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The rewards of giving Chris compliments.

<blockquote>''Compliments will get you '''fuzzy-wuzzies'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Picked up from the children's book, ''[[A Warm Fuzzy Tale]]''.

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|prickly-wicklies]]
</blockquote>

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== G ==
|-
|
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|This is who Chris actually believes in.]]
;[[Gal pal|gal-pal]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a female friend.

<blockquote>''And also, I would like to give a shout-out to...Ivy, sweet '''gal-pal''' of mine...and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_18_March_2009_More_Updated</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Strangely enough, Chris rarely refers to any of his female friends as "friends", which stems from his belief that all female friends have the potential to be [[CWC-isms#S|sweethearts]]. Because of this, Chris refers to his female friends as his "girlfriends". To make it seem that he really cares for these "girlfriends", Chris refers to such women by a cutesy pet-name, namely "gal-pal".</blockquote>

;gawd
<blockquote>
1. ''(interjection)'' eye dialect of "god", Used in the place of "god" when it is used to express annoyance, shock, or pain.

<blockquote>''Life is f***ed up. (I had a real stressful Sunday afternoon) '''Gawd'''! Just... GAWD!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#STRESSFUL_SUNDAY._GAWD.21</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly meant to be used as a way past cool way to say "god" to add dramatic effect.</blockquote>

;gaybian
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a male lesbian

<blockquote>''Uh… simply put—and I am willing to say this… in sound mind and body: I… am a '''gaybian'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet</ref></blockquote>

Origin: With [[Clyde Cash]] threatening to harm [[Julie]], him forcing Chris to "come out of the closet", and Chris having no clue how to handle the situation, Chris thought it would be clever to admit he was gay, but yet he isn't attracted to men. Thus, he tacked on the word "gay" onto "lesbian" to create the word "gaybian".</blockquote>

;geinus
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a genius

<blockquote>''Robotnik! Robotnik! I'm a mad '''geinus'''! Robotnik, Robotnik!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_1</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An accidental misspelling of "genius", this CWC-ism is the result of Chris's ability to spell, or lack thereof. In his futile attempts to spell words with "eni", he substitutes this with "ein", possibly due to his habit of spelling words phonetically.</blockquote>

;give birth, give the birth
<blockquote>
1. ''(verb)'' To transfer possession of the state of having been born, by bearing as offspring.

<blockquote>''My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only '''gave the birth'''--gave me birth at their ages...which my mother is sixty-six, currently, and my father is currently eighty. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth...then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of--for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early [[1980s]].''<ref>[[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to think that a sentence like "Barbara gave birth to Christian" is grammatically equivalent to a sentence like "Barbara gave Go-bots to Christian."
</blockquote>

;go make a rhyme
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate that he is in a [[Chris and writing|poetic]] mood.

<blockquote> ''Oh, Back Off, '''go make a rhyme'''. Love will come your way in good time.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/913230475774369794</ref> Keep Heart, Have hope and faith. Life is a coinkie-dink strafe. Have an open heart, don’t be afraid. Your sweetie is likely in your friendship parade.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris intended to write a rhyme in order to sound poetic in a tweet, continuing with the rhyming schtick in several subsequent ones. Due to his own laziness, the best Chris could come up with in terms of words that rhyme with "time" is "rhyme".
</blockquote>

;[[Godjesus]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(shorthand)'' God and Jesus Christ.

<blockquote> ''As I have guide, as I was guide [sic] by, uh, God and Jesus. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, '''Godjesus''' were mad at me, so, even though she r-, even though she requested the recent items of question, sex-, [quietly] sexual stuff--videos and pictures--I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Matthew_5:27,_CWC_Confessions</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And also, who I'd like to thank, '''GodJesus''', our God and our Lord and savior, for their support, for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow, I am guided by Jesus.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_9_April_2009</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is somewhat aware of the Holy Trinity (Holy Spirit, Son, and Father), the three forms that God takes in mainstream Christianity. Despite accepting Jesus as the son of God, Chris believes that God and Jesus are essentially the same entity. As a result, whenever he mentions God, he is never reluctant to mention Jesus in the same sentence. Because of this, Chris made this CWC-ism as a shorthand of "God and Jesus".
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== H ==
|-
|
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris does NOT look like Chris Farley]]
;hand-drawing
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An original drawn image, as opposed to a facsimile of that image.

<blockquote>''I mean, does that look like a printout to you? No! It's a '''HAND-DRAWING'''! It's the original hand-drawing of the back cover I constantly used! Among all the other hand drawings on my SHELF! In my BINDERS! IN THIS ROOM! In this house!''<ref>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To sketch without the aid of digital technology, such as a computer.

<blockquote>''No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the '''hand-drawing''' and you draw everything on your PhotoShop with your computer mouse.''<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's process for producing his drawings is to draw them, by hand, on physical paper, and then scan the paper into his computer and use image editing software to add effects like lettering or (for the purpose of breaking the fourth wall) photographs. He takes comfort in the belief that ownership of the original paper drawings is evidence of his authorship and will frequently cite this in defense against perceived thieves and trolls.

Chris also thinks that drawing on a computer instead of paper is an inferior method of producing artwork; he thinks the results look "blocky and low-resolution," which probably speaks more to his [[:File:179-ShineSchuChara.jpg|his own experience using MSPaint]] than the artistic quality of, for example, [[Asperchu]]. The fact that a digital artist like Alec Benson Leary is nonetheless ''using his hands'' does not seem to have occurred to Chris.
</blockquote>

;[[heart level]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his emotional state

<blockquote>''100% Change the number to change your '''heart level''' and you can write a sentence to indicate how you feel.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Heart_level</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The concept of the "heart level" most likely stems from Chris's inability to understand emotions. As an alternative, Chris tends to use video game terms in order to measure such emotions.</blockquote>

;heartsweet
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Rosey, as often as birds tweet, will you be my lovely '''heartsweet'''?''<ref>"[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Rearrangement of "sweetheart," possibly coined initially to provide more rhyming options in poetry. Chris primarily uses this term in Sonichu's dialogue, as the character's pet name for Rosechu. When speaking for himself, Chris tends to prefer "sweetheart," although the trolls use "heartsweet" in conversation with him.

''See also: [[sweetbolt]]''
</blockquote>

;heavyweight
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Stockboy; person employed to move heavy objects and perform other menial labor.

<blockquote>If she gets pregnant and can't work, then I would be working. I would be working VERY HARD AND HEAVILY. [...] If I have to I would be, get one of the '''heavyweights''', that just moves the boxes around the, stock the shelves at a grocery store.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' heavy.

<blockquote>I do not think Chris Farley looks like me at all, plus he was a LOT more '''heavyweight''' than me, and he was more wild than me.<ref>[[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, as usual, has to repurpose words rather than use the existing words that already mean what he wants to say.
</blockquote>

;[[HEXBox]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the video game consoles made by Microsoft, primarily the XBox 360.

<blockquote>I never cared for the '''HEXBox''', and frankly it LACKS heavily in comparison to the Wii and PS3, PLUS YOU HAVE TO PAY THEIR FEES TO EVEN GO ONLINE OR DOWNLOAD DEMOS WITH IT.</blockquote>

Origin: Due to his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Brand Loyalty]], Chris had an irrational hatred for the XBox, simply because of how much you've got to pay for it to access some of its content<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_5</ref>. Because Chris viewed this device as a curse to humanity, he tacked the word "hex", which is defined as being a curse, onto the original name of the console.</blockquote>

;hide behind/under his mother's skirt
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' To behave in a cowardly, immature fashion.

<blockquote>''You come to me now. Come face me like a man. Unless you want to continue being called a cow-a quivelling coward who '''hides under his mother's skirt'''.''<ref>[[Challenge for Clyde II]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An antiquated phrase alluding to children literally hiding behind their mother's skirts when frightened.
</blockquote>

;[[homo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male homosexual

<blockquote>''Yes; the '''Homos''' I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Common_Questions''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' homosexual

<blockquote>''Every one of you who thinks I'm '''homo''' and calls me that—-because I am not; I'm straight! I'm straight!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' relating to homosexuals

<blockquote>''Again, to reiterate the issue, THE GOD DAMN F***IN' '''Homo''' Ads MUST BE GONE!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Blog</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had a hatred for homosexuals, out of fear that he'll become one himself. Even uttering words like "gay" and "homosexual" make him uncomfortable.</blockquote>

;[[Honest Content|honest]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' NSFW, containing adult content.

<blockquote>''Parental Advisory - VERY '''HONEST''' content.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P97.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only has a slightly good understanding of what honesty is. However, Chris doesn't seem to understand when it's most appropriate to be honest. In his mind, to attract mates, he has to be honest all of the time, even if this includes instances of his sexual misadventures. Chris knows that he's not supposed to discuss such topics with ordinary people, so he would have to keep such things in secret. Therefore, in his mind, it would be the "honest" thing to do to discuss such actions.
</blockquote>

;Hurtful Truth Level
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A point at which honest criticism should be stopped so as to avoid hurting a person's feelings, regardless of the usefulness of the advice.

<blockquote>''And another thing, When constantly exceeding that '''Hurtful Truth Level''' to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in an email to Jackie after she had pointed out several glaring flaws in Chris's lifestyle and personality. Rather than take her criticism to heart and improve himself, he got angry and defensive, wishing that she would show sympathy for him instead.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== I ==
|-
|
[[File:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|thumb|right]]

;I can feel the cosmos
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Statement of achievement and oneness with the universe.

<blockquote>''I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better. '''I can feel the cosmos!''' Peace.''<ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by a line from the game Katamari Damacy, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmWxNFq6_3U "Oh, I feel it. I feel the cosmos."]
</blockquote>

;I got a fish

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Claim that one owns a fish.

<blockquote>'''''I got a fish!''' Would ya like to make a wish?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Got_A_Fish</ref>
''I got a fish Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish?''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expressed angrily when you wish to break someone apart to kill them

<blockquote>''Jason Kendrick Howell... you BASTARD! BASTARD! You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even DESCRIBE it! YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW, BUT... '''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!''' Goodbye!''<ref>[[Jason Kendrick Howell message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as a [[death threat]] to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he has hacked Sonichu.net.</blockquote>

;IBAChandler
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Abbreviation for "I be a chandler," i.e., "I am a person named 'Chandler.'"

<blockquote>''I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that '''IBAChandler''' account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.''<ref>[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(proper noun)'' [[YouTube]] username in use by Christian Weston Chandler during his conflict with [[Liquid Chris]], leading trolls to accuse Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]].

3. ''(proper noun)'' Name of a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' villain based upon Liquid Chris, ironically named for the real Chris's alias.

<blockquote>'''''I B A Chandler''', And I am here to copycatly sieze claim of you hedgehogs and this city from your absent mayor's domain.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 79</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by [[Bob Chandler]]'s license plate, "I B MR C" ("I be Mister C.").<ref>[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;ID
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Identifying.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and Vestites; '''ID''' as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly derived from ID meaning "Identification". </blockquote>

;[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|infinitely high boyfriend factor]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the extremely high probability that any woman Chris talks to is not [[CWC-isms#boyfriend-free|boyfriend-free]].

<blockquote>''With the '''infinitely high Boyfriend-Factor''', I am not fond of about 99.999999999996% of the total male population, with a margin-of-error of the 4 billionth of a percent (for about 100 men) of whom are okay acquaintences.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_Aug-Dec_2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In general, Chris will almost never find a sweetheart.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F</ref> Already aware of this fact, but not willing to admit he's not at all attractive to most women, Chris blames it on the fact that most men are "jerks", and that one probably is already dating the woman he's trying to latch onto.</blockquote>

;instinction

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An instance of something being used a certain way.

<blockquote>''Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all '''instinctions''' and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_English</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Once again an instance of Chris trying to sound smart by using a word that sounds foreign to him, made up or otherwise. The end result, however, gives the impression that Chris isn't familiar with the word "instances".

</blockquote>
|}

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! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== J ==
|-
|
;janekop
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A female [[CWC-isms#jerkop|jerkop]].

<blockquote>''YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. SO SAYS THIS '''JANEKOP'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Feelings_of_the_election_results</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas the term "jerkop" is a portmanteau of the CWC-ism "jerk" and the word "cop", janekop is a portmanteau of the words "jane" and "cop". The word "jane" is a slang word for "woman". <ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jane</ref>
</blockquote>
;[[JERKS|jerk]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. Any man that Chris dislikes, particularly one that gets in the way of his LoveQuest.

<blockquote>''On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel '''jerks'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "jerk" is generally defined as "A person with unlikable or obnoxious qualities and behavior, typically mean, self-centered or disagreeable." <ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jerk#Etymology_1</ref>. As stated in the quote above, Chris believes that all men to be cruel, selfish, and overall unlikeable. Therefore, he views almost all men as jerks.
</blockquote>
;[[Jerkop|jerkop]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. An official of the law.

<blockquote>''I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a prepared speech to say to them stupid '''Jerkops'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Get-Tar_Region</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris views most officers of the law as jerks, due to how often they'd thwart his LoveQuest, the term is a portmanteau of "jerk" and "cop". Possibly a pun on the word "jerkoff", which is defined as being "a contemptible man". <ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/jerk--off</ref></blockquote>

;JULAAAAAAAY
<blockquote>''(interjection)'' 1. An expression used by Chris to indicate how much he'd love having sex for the first time with [[Julie]]

<blockquote>"Oh, Julie...'''JULAAAAAY''', JULAAAAAAAAAAY!!!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first shouted this infamous CWC-ism in the video [[For Julie's Eyes Only]], which he intended to share with only [[Julie]] to show what their first date would amount to, despite this breaking his Three Date Rule. Seeing how Chris was somewhat of a porn junkie,<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_Adam_%26_Eve_purchases</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Miyamoto_emails#Chris_Sets_the_Record_STRAIGHT</ref>, Chris must have picked up that during sexual intercourse, one of the people may shout the name of the other person in order to "spice up" the orgy. After the video got leaked, the term started to be used by trolls humorously, to the point where [[weens]] started using the phrase in excess, making the CWC-ism lose its luster.</blockquote>

</blockquote>
|}

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! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== K ==
|-
|
[[File:Autistic Kicks Back.png|200px|thumb|The autistic kicking back!]]

;[[Kick the Autistic]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' America's favorite game

<blockquote>''I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC!"''' *sigh*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any action which involves doing something to Chris that he doesn't like

<blockquote>''And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC"''', then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#21_January</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' Any form of discrimination towards Chris for being [[autism|autistic]].

Origin: Chris had this paranoid idea that the whole world is going against him and his goals, solely due to his [[autism]]. In this sense, the fact that so many people supposedly wanted to thwart his goals made him feel like he was being "kicked" around.

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== L ==
|-
|

;[[Laughs Under Lucricities]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(backronym)'' backronym for "LULZ"

<blockquote>''Although, F.Y.I., "LULZ" is short for "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''"''<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris knows "lulz" is a variant of "LOL" and that it does not actually stand for anything, although he seems to think it must be written in all-caps anyway like an acronym. Originally he would simply say "LULZ" ''ought'' to stand for "Laughs Under Lucricities," but he soon began implying that it already does.<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2008|Email]] from Chris to Robert Simmons V on 12 August 2008</ref>

2. ''(noun)'' Any form of humor made at Chris' expense

</blockquote>

;lesbian soul
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' What Chris believes to be his true [[Chris and sexuality|sexuality]].

<blockquote>''I am an all-around, good natured, high-functioning autistic, Female '''Lesbian Soul''', and Transwoman, artist, gamer and creative type.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;level-up king
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Master of Pokemon, and possibly other card games.

<blockquote>''There must have been about 6 people including Chris and myself at the tourney and when he won he was jumping up and down a yelling "I'm the '''level up king'''!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mimms_and_Lucas_Q%26A#Follow_up</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before his permanent ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]], Chris would play games of Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh with some of the other customers. Despite his sick obsession with both games, Chris never developed any type of strategy to compete with other players, making it very difficult to succeed at the game, even when he played against small children. Eventually, when the shop was just down to six people, which included Chris, the manager, Mims, and Lucas, Chris did win a match against a relatively new player, and excitedly jumped up and down at this accomplishment like a child. Along with this, he shouted the phrase "I AM THE LEVEL-UP KING!"</blockquote>

;like, you know
<blockquote>1. ''(discourse particle)'' Space filler during sentence.

<blockquote>''I don't want too much conflict to happen, '''like, you know'''. You wouldn't want too much conflict to happen, like, you know. I mean-like, you know, between you and him any further. Yeah.''<ref>[[I Love You Kacey]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Love Quest]]
<blockquote>1.''(noun)'' Chris's on-going search for a sweetheart.

<blockquote>''As for Wes, I blame all of these happenings on him. If he had not taken my life-long friend away from me, I might have a Pretty Girlfriend today. And I would not have had to set out on endeavoring '''LOVE QUEST'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In its context, the term Love Quest, makes sense, as a "quest" is defined as "a search or pursuit made in order to find or obtain something".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/quest</ref> In Chris's case, he's trying to find a significant other in order to solve all of his problems.</blockquote>

;lovehog
<blockquote>1.'(noun)'' A lover in a relationship between two [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Also, I have finished the drawing for you, and I have shown off the Original '''LoveHog''' Couple's Wedding Rings, and their three children: Cerah Rosey, Robbie Sonee and (Shiney Rosey) Christine Rosey.''</blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehog".</blockquote>

;lucricities
<blockquote>1. ''(pl. noun?)'' lurid acts or motivations (?)

Origin: Chris completely made this word up, presumably based on "lucrid," which may in turn be based on the actual word "lurid." According to Chris, the word "lulz" can mean either "Laughs at my expense" or "Laughs under lucricities," so presumably the two contexts are equivalent.
</blockquote>

;lucrid
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' obscene, profane, wicked
<blockquote>''And promoting the hatred, and...drawing such loose—such '''lucrid''' mockeries is not gonna further the story plot or have anything new created, or even gonna help in any way...''<ref name=csm>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Possibly a corruption of "lurid," given the context. Alternatively, it might be a corruption of "ludicrous." Chris has used this word to describe the homoerotic/dickgirl art on the ED page, as well as the fan comic in which he was depicted as a man-baby.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== M ==
|-
|
[[File:Mass_Debate.jpg|right|thumb|Massive Debating]]
;make one's own peeps n' poops

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to urinate and deficate at the same time

<blockquote>Uh, actually, uh, actually Crystal is uh, doing, is uh, doing her preschool homework, and uh, Reg-, and Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' babychild! '''Made his lil' peeps n' poops'''! And he went, and he went weewee all over the bathroom.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/PlayingHouse</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a clip of Family Guy, where Herber the Pervert is letting his dog out to "make his pees n' poops". <ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtlwEfZEmrg</ref></blockquote>

;mass debate

<blockquote>1. (adjective) to pleasure one's self; to masturbate

<blockquote> "I've actually done it ['''mass debating'''] to myself so many times, even with a hunk of - even with an inflatable plastic woman..."</blockquote>

Origin: This particular euphemism comes from Chris's tendency to refrain from using inappropriate language, as well as his unusual variation of a southern accent combined with a minor speech impediment.</blockquote>

;[[Manajerks|manajerk]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a store manager

<blockquote>''And then these two guys- and then these two '''manajerks''' approached me.''</blockquote>

Origin: A portmantau of "manager" and "jerk". </blockquote>

;mashed potato grenade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[Wikipedia:Stielhandgranate|Stielhandgranate]], a special German hand grenade with a handle.

<blockquote>"I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my '''mashed potato grenade''' could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed fro murder."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2013_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a Facebook post sent to [[Megan Schroeder]] accusing her of his ban from the [[Game Place]], where he [[Chris and reality|makes paranoid claims]] of what she, [[Mimms]], [[Lucas]], and [[Snyder]] were thinking that day. A corruption of "potato masher grenade", a common English nickname of the Stielhandgranate<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stielhandgranate</ref>.</blockquote>

;mental block

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' mental disorder; a disorder which inhibits normal functioning.

<blockquote>''And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And, after the stress from some of the people—people at PVCC, as well as my '''mental block''' [mimes punching himself in the head] of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir—approach the girls like I used to.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Chan%27s_Public_Announcement</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to his [[autism]] as a "mental block", soley due to how it keeps him from socializing with girls. In reality, a mental block is the inability to remember a specific thing. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_block</ref></blockquote>

;mislabel

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to put a label on Chris or any of his creations in a way he doesn't like, regardless of truth
2. ''(noun)'' a label of such slanderous nature; see also "misunderstanding"
<blockquote>''I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE '''Mislabeling''' than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again? ''<ref>[[Common Questions#1_February_2010]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Just about everywhere. He appears to use this term as often as the word "slanderous". Curiously, the redundancy "ill-mislabeling" (as if there were any other kind) has appeared once.<ref>[[CWC Blog#28_December_2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;misspeak

<blockquote>1.''(verb)'' to lie

<blockquote>''Sometimes, I have '''misspoke'''. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. Hand to God. And on my Bible. I'd have to go look for it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/ToJackie</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Instead of accepting that someone has called him out on [[Lies|his bullshit]], Chris prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this ploy.

</blockquote>

;misunderstanding

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a deliberate view that contradicts Chris; see also "mislabel"
<blockquote>''*AND WE WILL NOT TAKE THE '''MISUNDERSTANDINGS''', THE MISLABELS, AND ALL THE LIKE SITTING DOWN!!!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Issue_9/Page_39|2=Issue 9 Page 39}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misappropration. Note that it is not, as in reality,<ref>[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misunderstanding Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "misunderstanding"]</ref> a mistaken notion (alternatively a dispute) based on faulty information, but a malicious action worthy of [[tard rage]]. Apparently a slanderous troll has to actively "misunderstand" Chris. Also, Chris has used the related word "misunderstood" (participle adjective) as an insult, not realizing that if the troll misunderstood (transitive verb) him, ''Chris'' would be the one that was misunderstood (participle adjective).<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Rosechu_the_transwoman|Mailbag 39]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;modnar
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' random

<blockquote>''I may be '''modnar''', but I try not to be offensive, and if I do, then I am sorry. I can not please Everyone.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Random", spelt backwards.</blockquote>

;[[Monthly tugboat|monthly tugboat]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's Social Security Disability Service

<blockquote>"I'm getting by livin' with my folks and a '''monthly tugboat.'''"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Monthly_tugboat#References_by_Chris</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently coined the term "Monthly Tugboat" due to a comparison he makes between gaining money through his SSDS vs. winning the lottery. In his mind, winning the lottery is like riding a "Luxury ship that can easily sink", while gaining money from the government is the same as getting cargo from a ship pulled by a tugboat. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/BlueSpike_Skype_Logs_12</ref></blockquote>

;[[Muscle bra|muscle bra]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A sports bra used for covering a man's chest.

<blockquote>''And you know what, I highly recommend this to every dude who goes around shirtless: wear a '''muscle bra'''. Because nobody, and I mean nobody wants to see your dog-gone ugly pecs, they're so ugly and repulsive, ugh... creeps everybody out.''</blockquote>


|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== N ==
|-
|

[[File:CWCcomeuppancemedallion.JPG|thumb|Shiver me timbers!]]
;[[naïve]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb, lacking intelligence.

<blockquote>''You are such a cowardly, '''naïve''', retarded, individual.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers</ref ></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only seems to understand the most simplified definition of the word. In general terms, the word "naïve" is defined as "showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment."<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/naive</ref> However, in Chris's mind, the word is used to "question one's intelligence". Despite his distaste for the use of the word on him, this turns out to be a commonly used insult by Chris.</blockquote>

[[File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg|thumb|Chris travels to France]]
;navy
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' semen.

<blockquote>''You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''navy''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Play on words, i.e, a navy is a collection of seamen/semen.

''See also: [[CWC-isms#C|Comeuppance]]''
</blockquote>

;NEARLY SAME
<blockquote>1. ''(Adjective)'' Similar.

<blockquote>''And so I killed about killed about twenty miles round trip for gas to go find her house. But it turns out that was a troll posing as that girl. [sighs] THE VOICES SOUNDED '''NEARLY SAME'''.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;neutral
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' platonic.

<blockquote>''I apologize, but I meant the term '''neutrally''', and I never meant anything from that.''<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And One More thing, Darling!... Talluah Bankhead would be Insulted with your response to the term's '''neutral''' usage. Hmpf!'<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes words like "darling" and "dear", are gender neutral terms. Because of this, he assumes that if he claims that he used it in a "neutral" way, people will know he's not using the term in a romantic tone.

</blockquote>

;[[Niggo|niggo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An African-American person.

<blockquote>''Where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggos'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Julie_Reveals_Herself</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bastardization of the racial slur "nigger". This butchering was done after [[BlueSpike]] forced Chris to say: "''BILLY MAYS is the new mayor of CWCville, and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers''". Chris decided to repeat this phrase, but decided to "outsmart" BlueSpike by replacing "niggers" with "niggos".</blockquote>

;[[Nombie-zazis|nombie-zazis]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' zombie nazis

<blockquote>''Anyway, as for the medical study, and this will require your aid, Magi-Chan. In June of 2015, the scientists have found the gene-like molecule which makes a person turn...ugh..'''nombie-zazis'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Son10revp3.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacement for homosexuals and homosexuality in the revised [[Sonichu 10]].</blockquote>

;not-troll
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a victim of trolling.

<blockquote>''Consider who does more harassing, which do you block? <ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-278#post-2549629]]</ref>
<blockquote>
*Every Foul-Mouth Troll
*The '''Not-Troll''' they follow</blockquote>''</blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's mind, only two types of people exist on [[the Internet]], those who are trolls, and those who are victims of trolling. Because the person being trolled is supposedly '''not''' a troll, they are a "not-troll". Chris eventually deleted the aforementioned post, and reposted it, replacing "not-troll" with "victim" to clarify what he was referring to in the first place.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-279</ref></blockquote>

;[[Noviophobia|noviophobia]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the fear that someone you want to date is already dating someone else.

<blockquote>''His one fault, that has restricted him from finding the Ms. Right, he had a major case of '''Noviophobia''', where he is afraid to even approach most ladies, because he thought that they were all already paired up with “A Jerk.”''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_News_Dash</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Because Chris was so frustrated with so many [[CWC-isms#J|jerks]] stealing his potential mates, Chris decided that his envy and hatred of men was a real phobia. Thus, overconfident in his ability to speak [[Spanish]], formed the word "noviophobia" by using the Spanish word ''novio'', meaning "boyfriend", and the English suffix, -phobia, meaning fear . </blockquote>
</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== O ==
|-
|
[[File:Axels2.jpg|thumb|right]]
;OH! MY AXELS! (or OW! MY AXELS!)
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of pain in one's axles (the central shafts of rotating wheels or gears in a machine).

<blockquote>'''''OOOHHHHHH!!!! MY AXELS!!!!!'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Written for [[Ghostbusters|Ghost Buggy]]'s cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], based upon the character's tendency to complain about its aching mechanical components.</blockquote>

;old-fashioned<blockquote>
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Racist.

<blockquote>''But still, call me '''old-fashioned''' but, I'd rather be- I would not- I'd uh- I'd definitely wouldn't uh... NOT BLACK. Not black.''<ref>[[Mumble_4]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' Opposed to miscegenation.

<blockquote>''I mean '''Old Fashioned''' as in the Classic white-marry-white type of thing.''<ref>[[Mailbag 37]]</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' Homophobic.
<blockquote>''My father is '''OLD FASHIONED'''; he NEVER gives thought to homos, and he HATES them too.''<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

4. ''(adjective)'' Dating back to the 1980s.

<blockquote>''Ah, you can tell this is an '''old-fashioned''' Lego set on account of this—the old-fashioned "LegoLand" on the corner.''<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref></blockquote>

5. ''(adjective)'' Preferring real women over waifus.
<blockquote>''Nothing against waifus and the people who have them, but I Never Really understood the appeal and concept of making out a character from a show who is Dimensions Away from your own league to be any sort of a significant other to you. I’m more '''old-fashioned''' towards real women.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/954587249622077440</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;ounce of vagina

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Essentially Chris's way of saying "I'll at least lose my virginity at some point".

<blockquote>''And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one '''ounce of vagina''', I have your number, and you're going down!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Attention_All_Sonichu_Fans_(NOT_HATERS)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref> Which, after an encounter with a girl named [[Mia Hamm]], may be true...[[Virgin with rage|or not]].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 6th, 2008]]</ref>
</blockquote>
;outercourse
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the act of fingering

2. ''(noun)'' a handjob

<blockquote>''I understand. You may or may not have had much exposure to sexual images as I've had, so the idea of a "hand job" (which was the act drawn there) as part of '''outtercourse''''' [sic]'' (versus intercourse) was a surprise to you.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_2008#Chris_thinks_she_was_scarred_because_she_doesn.27t_know_much_about_sex</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "outercourse" is essentially another way to refer to dry humping.<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/outercourse</ref> In Chris's mind however, outercourse simply refers to sex which involves touching each other genitals, because they happen outside of the body.

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== P ==
|-
|
[[File:MPSGotReal.jpg|right|thumb|Shit just got real!]]
;parkay
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an epic style of running

<blockquote>''Hello there, fans! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the Sonichu franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do a '''parkay''' from this point all the way down to the gara--parking garage where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Edge</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], Chris calls his style of running "parkay". Chris confused his running as a form of parkour, an acrobatic sport typically used in the military as a means of practicing the navigation of a complex environment without the use of equipment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkour</ref>. Given Chris's [[Speech Impediment]], the word "parkour" somehow came out as "parkay".
</blockquote>

;[[Parody|parody]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any work that "borrows" characters, plots, or styles from other pieces of fiction, whether infringing International [[Copyright]] Law or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the Sonichu Comics, except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise '''parodic'''.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:Issue_8_Cover.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of what constitutes as a parody most likely stems from his interest in shows like [[Family Guy]] and [[Wikipedia:Robot Chicken|Robot Chicken]], both of which use copyrighted characters and make jokes around them. In his mind, because those shows can get away with using such characters, that gives him an excuse to do the same thing in his comics. Ironically, Whenever Chris spots an actual "parody", he thinks that the characters from the original work are being defaced.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Parody#Chris_does_not_understand_the_concept_of_parody</ref></blockquote>

;peanut
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who disregards you, or otherwise does not accept you for who you are.

<blockquote>''So you enjoy it, just do it—don't worry about other people's opi—pinions. Because, uh, compared to the other schools, those people who disregard you are just total '''peanuts'''. And I'm not talkin' Charlie Brown; I'm talkin' 'bout the little nuts after the shells. The real peanut gallery. That would be peanuts, wouldn't it?''<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Apparently derived from "[[Wikipedia:peanut gallery|peanut gallery]]," a term used to describe the hecklers in an vaudeville audience who would throw peanuts at a performer. Chris's own spin on this concept is to dismiss such hecklers as being insignificant like literal peanuts.
</blockquote>

;[[Pedofork|pedofork]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pedophile.

<blockquote>''I am not a '''pedofork''', you DORKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "pedophile" and "dork". Coined in Chris's [[Madman Rising]] video, in response to the trolls who were comparing him to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herbert_(Family_Guy_character)| Herbert the Pervert] from Family Guy.</blockquote>

;[[Pickle|pickle]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A penis, particularly one of [[JERKS|any man that isn't Chris]].

<blockquote>''Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu, Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' '''PICKLE'''!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Chrisreply3.PNG</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "pickle" is one of the few hundred slang words for the word "penis".<ref>https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/PenisTesticlesSlang.pdf</ref> It is unknown why Chris prefers to refer to the penises of other men as "pickles", while he calls his own his "duck", but it may have to do with Chris's sexual insecurity and the fact that he legitimately hates actual pickles <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_4#Why_Chris_hates_pickles</ref>, whereas Chris thinks he's special enough to have a cutesy name for his own penis.</blockquote>

;[[Pmurt]]

<blockquote>1. ''(proper noun)'' President Donald Trump

<blockquote>''EID '''PMURT''' EID!!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Eid,_Pmurt,_Eid</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Donald Trump's last name, but spelled backwards. In Chris's first usage of this CWC-ism, Chris mentioned how "Trump spelled backward is "Pmurt", which sounds like "hurt"".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2016_Facebook_posts#Registered_to_vote</ref> This is because of Chris's strong hatred for Trump, despite showing very little knowledge about [[Chris and politics|America's political system]]. Chris also reversed the name because to him, reversing someone's name will degrade and weaken them. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L</ref>In his eyes, if he repeats this word again and again, people will start turning against Trump and start voting for [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary]], which, unsurprisingly enough, never happened <ref>https://www.nytimes.com/elections/results/president</ref>.</blockquote>

;poetry
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Something which causes awe.

<blockquote>''Soon, the chill will come, and the skies setting into darkness; it's like '''Poetry''' in the truest motion."<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-8-21-crescent-eclipse.33504/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown
</blockquote>

;poke
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''Anyway, eclectic! High on the hedge and high on the hog. You want some of this '''poke''', mon?<ref>[[CWC address to Royal Board]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended as a demonstration of what "Soni-Chew the Eclectic Heeedge Hog Poke Mon of London, England" would sound like. A coded reference to Pokémon.
</blockquote>

;[[Prickly-Wicklies|prickly-wicklies]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Punishment for insulting or harming Chris; essentially Chris's word for karma.

<blockquote>''War gets you '''prickly-wicklies'''... as well as punches.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Warm_Fuzzy_Tale</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the Children's book, [[A Warm Fuzzy Tale]].

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#F|fuzzy-wuzzies]]

</blockquote>

;[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]

<blockquote>1. ''(backronym)'' The headquarters of several Sonichu villains.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: The name itself is a backronym of the college Chris attended, [[PVCC|the Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. After experiencing several mishaps throughout his college experience<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_English</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_college</ref>, the dean giving him the cold hard truth about why his [[Love Quest]] is doomed to fail became the straw that broke the camel's back, and Chris thought it would be a smart idea to deface the college afterward in his comics.</blockquote>

;prowldent
<blockquote>1. ''(???)'' Unknown.

<blockquote>There's no quote to cite this from, just a logo in which Chris gives the name "Prowldent Virginia Community College" to [[PVCC]].<ref>[[:File:ProwldentVCC.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely combining connotations of "prowl" and "dent" (either to leave an indentation or [[fangs|teeth]]).
</blockquote>

;Pu Tuhs!
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Shut Up!

<blockquote>''SHE; my Ariel Starter was Female from the start, so '''Pu Tuhs!'''''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Q ==
|-
|

;q-sand
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Short for quarter sandwich (i.e. a quarter of a sandwich).

<blockquote>
''So, mom ignored her and ate the '''q-sand''' in front of her.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 31]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Appeared in an [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail]] sent to [[Jackie]] dated August 5, 2011. Most likely unnecessarily used as a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]] abbreviation.
</blockquote>

;quarters
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An office space; headquarters.

<blockquote>''Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her '''quarters''' and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_Wikipedia_profile</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The way Chris uses the word "quarters" in this case makes it sound like Chris is being forced to go join the military, as in this context, the word "quarters" refers to the housing of a military personnel and their family.<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/quarters</ref> Considering that Chris already viewed [[Mary Lee Walsh|Mary]] as a [[Mary Lee Walsh#Mary Lee Walsh in Sonichu|supervillain]] scheming to [[Virginia is for Virgins|end all love in Virginia]], he most likely meant to refer to Mary's office as her "headquarters", but thinks that one's headquarters are the same thing as one's "quarters".

2. ''(noun, pl.)'' coins, no matter their origin or worth.

<blockquote>''Uhh. I want a soda, but it takes only C '''quarters''' and I only have W quarters. Do you have any change?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The first time this word was used in such a strange way was in [[Sonichu 9]], where it is revealed that [[CWCville|CWCville's]] currency is made up of "C-quarters" and "W-quarters". According to this issue, 10 C-quarters, make up a single W-quarter, which ultimately defeats the whole concept of the "quarter" coin. Strangely enough, despite being a part of the United States, CWC-ville still issues this strange form of currency, along with US dollars. Possibly to make this strange connection make somewhat more sense, Chris decided to refer to his currency as "quarters".

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== R ==
|-
|

[[File:ReldnahcTheRapier .jpg|thumb|Reldnahc the Rapier]]
;[[Raincoat|raincoat]]
<blockquote>1. (''noun'') a condom

<blockquote>''You ARE the woman...we gotta stop by Wall-Mall-Wart on the way for a "'''raincoat'''".''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "raincoat" is actually an archaic slang for the word "condom".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/raincoat</ref> Given that Chris has been raised by two geezers his whole life, and that part of his childhood has consisted of [[Gilligan's Island|old TV shows]], Chris thought that people would understand what he meant when he states that his Mary Sues are having protected sex with a raincoat.</blockquote>

;[[Random-access humor|random-access humor]]
<blockquote>1. (''noun'') non-sequital humor.

<blockquote>''Punchy grew up in a dojo, where he perfected his punches. He is also full of '''random-access humor'''. He lost his tail in a brutal fight.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP5.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his brain is completely random, and it always spews out incoherent garbage. In his mind, this works in the same way a computer processes random-access memory. <ref>Fhttps://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#Crossing_the_Na.C3.AFve_Line_.281:46:21-1:52:41.29)</ref>

</blockquote>

;rapier
<blockquote>
1. (''noun, attributive'') rapist, sexual assailant.

<blockquote>
''Now! My '''rapier''' friend, I would very much like you to get off me, please.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly a pun. Chris-Chan Sonichu calls [[Reldnahc_Notsew_Naitsirhc#Fictional_biography|Reldnahc Ha-Taque]] [[Chris-chan Sonichu#Transexual|his/her]] "rapier friend" in [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]] after Reldnahc tackles him/her to the ground in a suggestive pose and touches his/her chest, thus (in Chris's hyperbolic mind) "raping" him/her. He could also be using the externally attested definition, as an adjective meaning "witty"<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rapier#Adjective</ref>, metaphorically referring to a kind of thin, sharp-pointed sword.
</blockquote>

;[[Reality Cartoon|reality cartoon]]

<blockquote>
1. (''noun'') The universe.

<blockquote>
''Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a '''reality cartoon'''.''<ref>August 2017 tweets#"Life is a cartoon"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris's life revolves mainly around [[Vidya]] and cartoons, it would make sense to him that the most believable explanation for the universe and everything in it is that it's all a cartoon. Likely related to Chris's known belief that [[Chris_and_reality#Fictional_characters_and_media|all fiction actually exists in alternate universes]].
</blockquote>

;realistic

<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') realated to live-action.
<blockquote>
''Ah! Going for something '''realistic'''. Awesome.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, taking everything he sees at face value, possibly believes live-action shows actually happen.</blockquote>

;[[Recycling|recycling]]

<blockquote>1. (''verb'') the act of one ingesting their own semen to preserve their sperm count.

<blockquote> I '''recycle''' my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009</ref> </blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having very little knowledge of how the male reproductive system works, thinks that men can run out of sperm from masturbating or orgasming too much. Fearing the loss of "potential children", Chris actually thinks that by ingesting the sperm back into his body, his sperm count will stay in balance, thus, he is "recycling" it.

</blockquote>

;[[Reeb|reeb]]

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') beer or any other alcoholic beverage of the like.

<blockquote>''Then he glugs his '''reeb''', heh-heh, and then he conks out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, thinking he's so clever, decided to censor any mention of the word "beer" in his comics, by spelling the word backward.</blockquote>

;Resident-Evil refrigerator

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') The refrigerator in the previous Chandler Household.

<blockquote>''Kitchen very much blocked off all over... with the '''Resident Evil refrigerator''' right there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to the fridge as the "Resident Evil" kind, because in Japan, the game ''Resident Evil'' is known as ''Biohazard''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref><ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resident_Evil</ref> Considering the quality of the household, that name may very well fit the description of the fridge in the state it was in before filming the [[Tour of Chris's House II|Second House Tour]].</blockquote>

;[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]]

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') The female counterpart of the [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon]].</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Rosechu of CWCville, [[Rosechu]]. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the last name of the ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' character, Amy Rose, and "Raichu", the Evolved form of a Pikachu.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== S ==
|-
|
[[File:Wild Snergen Flergen.jpg|thumb]]

;salty
<blockquote>1 ''(adjective)'' to show more maturity or coarseness than is expected, especially knowledge of [[honest]] topics like [[Chris and sex|sex]].

<blockquote>''Ah, but I am not the weak person they think I am; I am much, much '''saltier'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon a line from "Bowling Girls", ninth episode of ''[[Excel Saga]]'': "But I'm not the sweet little girl I was a few minutes ago! I'm much, much saltier now!" "Salty" in this context derives from naval lingo, since the most experienced sailors would have greater exposure to both the saltwater seas and worldly experiences.
</blockquote>

;[[Scale of Respect|scale of respect]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his respect for other people.

<blockquote>I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my '''Scale of Respect''' each by 2 points<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Scale_of_Respect</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, like most other autistics, tends to view the world based on numerical values due to their lack of understanding of certain abstract concepts such as respect. Because of this, Chris made his very own numerical scale to decide on who should be respected, compared to who shouldn't.</blockquote>

;self-epic
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' describing a situation which is epic, and at the same time related to Chris and his various clones.

<blockquote>''And I will square-off in the TRULY '''SELF-EPIC''' Battle between me, and my Dark Half.''<ref>[[An Important Update]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;shitful
<blockquote>1. '(adjective)'' hurtful; defamitory.

<blockquote>''And this is the last time I will ever say anything in response to your '''shitful''' and hurtful comments and hatred for Hate's Sake!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2014_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Shitful is a vulgar slang word, synonymous with words like "boat-load" or "truck-load". Chris may have seen the "shit" part of this word, and assumed that the word is meant to be used for specific situations that seem "shitty" to him.</blockquote>

;[[SLGBTQ]]

<blockquote>1. ''(acronym)'' an extended acronym for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender).

<blockquote>''Considering your logo there, Texas will be feeling more love from the '''SLGBTQ''' community; give us props and Love, Lone Star State.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2017_tweets#Hurricane_Harvey_and_SLGBT</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first used this acronym, he didn't explain what groups the "S" or "Q" were supposed to represent, making plenty of people confused. Eventually, Chris revealed that the "S" represents '''s'''traight and cis-gender people, while "Q" represents "'''q'''ueers" or "'''q'''uestioning people". Chris believes that if he included straight people into LGBT, then those particular people would feel more invited to join into the community. Considering the fact that gay people are minorities, adding the "S" to LGBT only defeats the entire purpose of identifying people as LGBT in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a mentally handicapped person

<blockquote>''And finally, after a hard "odd" day, he rides home on a bus, but unfortunately, it had a few "'''slow-in-the-minds'''" on it.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;slow-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' mentally retarded

2. ''(adjective)'' gullible

3. ''(adjective)'' loss of train of thought

</blockquote>

;SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase one may shout out when asked for attendance.

<blockquote>'''''SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P6.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An obvious example of Chris's [[CWC-isms#R|random-access humor]]. This strange phrase appeared in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], when the cast was asked for their attendance during a [[CWC-isms#D|Dating Education]] class. When [[Wild Sonichu]] was asked for his attendance, he blurted out this phrase as Chris's many attempts to be funny in his comics. Given Chris's childish sense of humor, it would make a whole lot of sense for him to include a character randomly blurt out a nonsensical phrase out of nowhere.</blockquote>

;snooze cruise
<blockquote>1. a long period of slumber

<blockquote> ''Next, he had Trigonometry...I'd hate to be Christian when his nerves kicked into action after waking up from a "notey" '''snooze cruise''', but I was.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the school report [[A Week With Christian Chandler]]. Given the time this report was written, Chris picked up this phrase up from ''Sonic Adventure''.

</blockquote>

;somecummpentydifferent
<blockquote>1. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce a change in subject.

<blockquote>''Anyway and now for somecummpentydifferent stay tuned for '''somecummpentydifferent''' — a bunch of good pushups!''<ref>[[Getting Foam Ed]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce use of [[random-access humor]].

<blockquote>''And now for '''somecummpentydifferent'''. BUUUUNG! And now it's Monty Python's flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, Greeg, why is people running away.''<ref>[[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Note this is the very first thing he says, so there's nothing to be completely different ''from''.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is trying to say "And now for something completely different" like John Cleese does on [[Monty Python]]. Suffice to say Cleese's ability to say three multisyllabic words in rapid succession exceeds that of Chris.</blockquote>

;[[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]
<blockquote>1. (noun) The male counterpart of the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Sonichu of CWCville, Sonichu. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the name of the titualar character of ''Sonic the Hedgehog'', Sonic, and "Pikachu".</blockquote>

;soo
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Very, Very much.

<blockquote>''Dear Blanca, I am '''soo''' happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be''<ref>[[Chris's Letter to Blanca]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In writing, Chris often adds extra o's to the word "so" to prolong the "o" sound and show added emphasis. However, where most people would add two or more o's, (e.g., "I love you sooo much!"), Chris frequently only adds one, resulting in "soo," which makes the word look like it's supposed to be pronounced "sue". This has the (unintentional?) effect of mimicking the speech patterns of a Valley Girl or an effeminate homosexual.

This may originate from pamphlets published by [http://www.channing-bete.com/ Channing Bete], [[Autism|short and uninformative]] self-help pamphlets often handed out at churches, the last page of which often feature a summary headlined by "Soo…" Given his distrust of help from anyone other than [[Rocky]], it is not entirely impossible that Chris has read Channing Bete pamphlets occasionally.

This is one of many recurring jokes in the [[Sonichu Audiobooks]] in which the narrator pronounces words like "soo" as they are literally spelled, instead of how Chris intended them to be read.
</blockquote>

;soup beds
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Homeless shelter with beds

<blockquote>'' I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have '''soup beds'''. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS!''<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris tries to distill his "soup hotel" idea into its two components, but he mangles one of them by retaining the "soup" prefix.
</blockquote>

;sourdough region
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The crotch area

<blockquote>Its weak point is still the '''sourdough region''', but it would take FIVE KICKS to get to it<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_4_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown</blockquote>

;spike on one's shoulder
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' refers to the act of holding grievances towards someone.

<blockquote>That was, that was, that was misunderstanding, that was just, there was a whole bunch of misunderstandings between me and my employer, and he, and he has, and he had, and he had, and he had a '''spike on his shoulder''' against me.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A confusion with the phrase "chip on one's shoulder".</blockquote>

;sticky dream
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A wet dream

<blockquote>''After falling back asleep Chris had a "'''sticky dream'''."''<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris claims that a "wet dream" actually refers to wetting one's bed as opposed to nocturnal emission.
</blockquote>



;[[Sub-Episodes|sub-episode]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The side stories in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: A result of Chris' strange [[Chris and English#Television jargon|television jargon]] in his comics.</blockquote>

;sumbah
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Minced oath for "son of a bitch."

<blockquote>''Yo, Christian, thanks for saving my sister from that crazy '''sumbah'''''<ref>[[Sonichu Special 4]], page K-4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Probably based upon "sumbitch."
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetbolt|sweetbolt]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used by [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Ahh..that salad was great! What's wrong '''sweetbolt'''?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A sweetheart.

<blockquote>''I understand, and I will NEVER put it against you. Yes, as your '''SweetBolt'''. :)?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>





|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== T ==
|-
|
[[File:Duck Pounding Some Tom-Tom.jpeg|thumb|A duck pounding some tom-tom real hard]]

;teenages

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The 13-19 age group; teenage years.

<blockquote>''Ahem... hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all '''teenages''', as well as the, uh, gals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's [[Future Message]], he attempts to talk down to just about every age group. In order to do this, he starts his video off with the quote above. Chris clearly couldn't think of a way to refer to teenagers, so he decided to refer to such people by "teenages". A butchering of "people of all ages".</blockquote>

;telekinesis

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Telepathy, i.e. communication through long distances, usually via psychic or supernatural means.

<blockquote>''I’ve been communicating with her through '''telekinesis''', and she sounded very lonesome.''<ref>[[Silvana]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas tele'''kine'''sis means ''moving'' objects from a distance with psychic powers (c.f. ''[[wikipedia:kinetic energy|kinetic]]''), Chris has never used the term properly. [[Magi-Chan|Psychic]] [[Silvana|characters]] in the [[comic]] have both powers of telekinesis and telepathy, but Chris has only used the former to refer to both.
</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|tobacky]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' tobacco or tobacco products

<blockquote>''If I could, I would take every last ounce of '''tobacky''', put 'em on a rocket, and shoot 'em up to the Moon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris hated the act of smoking cigarettes so much that even uttering the word "tobacco" made him feel uncomfortable, so he created a new retarded sounding word to avoid saying the actual word.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref></blockquote>

;tom-tom

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia.

<blockquote>''MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR '''TOM-TOM''' TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from the short Adult Swim music video, ''Pound my Tom-Tom'', which served as the intro to the cartoon, ''Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil''<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DVoH0Njow</ref>. Considering Chris barely understands anything adult, the fact that this was meant to be a bad euphemism, which the character, Lucy, used to avoid directly mentioning her vagina, flew over his head.</blockquote>

;[[Tomgirl|tomgirl]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male who is into girly stuff; apparently, in Chris's mind, this goes all the way to [[Tomgirl Pictures|make-up and crossdressing]].

<blockquote>''I am '''Tomgirl'''.''<ref>[[:File:I_am_tomgirl.jpg|PSN comment as of 6 April 2011]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: analogous to "tomboy", i.e. a girl who likes boy-stuff.

</blockquote>

;too many crooks

<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of dissatisfaction with an overabundance of evildoers.

<blockquote>''Well, call it--this was "too many crooks." '''Too many crooks!''' Too many crooks! And that ED page is one of those crooks.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon the idiom, "too many cooks spoil the broth," although that idiom means something, whereas this is just an incomplete sentence.
</blockquote>

;triage

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' ménage à trois; a romantic relationship between three people.

<blockquote>''Magi-Chan Sonichu, Silvana Rosechu & Mewtwo / A Loving '''Triage'''''<ref>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A corruption or misspelling of "triad", possibly influenced by the ending of "ménage". "[[wikipedia:Triage|Triage]]" is a real word with a completely different meaning and unrelated etymology.
</blockquote>

;trollin' stupid

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Very stupid, in a manner pertaining to trolling.

<blockquote>''Because that's what you deserve, you God damn womanizing raping... '''trollin' stupid''' pickle suited... nigger!''<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to have coined this phrase for his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend"]] lyrics with "trollin'" serving as an intensifier along the lines of "fucking."
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== U ==
|-
|
[[File:Uncouth Twat.png|thumb|Most uncouth!]]
;ugly growth

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to refer to his own penis negatively.

<blockquote>''"Did I not just tell you I am Seven Inches Long?! It is soo long, that I am literally able to stretch it Under my taint, and tuck it between my own ass cheeks, beyond my ass hole. With help, I can literally even shove the head of the '''Ugly Growth''' Up Mine!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_2</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Un-clit|un-clit]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A piercing Chris got on his perrinium as an immitation clitoris.

<blockquote>''It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my '''un-clit'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Un-clit</ref></blockquote>

Origin: During his Tomgirl years, Chris was, and still is, very desperate to gain female body traits such as bigger breasts, wider hips, a fully functioning vagina, etc. In order to get a part of the work done, Chris got a piercing on his taint as a sort of pseudo-clitoris, showing more of Chris's limited knowledge of female anatomy. </blockquote>

;uncouth
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' unlikeable, lacking good manners.

<blockquote>''And, by the way, among which, You give the Males a Most Terrible and Horrible Name in your behavior. Most '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_1</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Trump is most Immature, '''Uncouth''', and Not Valid to be president.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Misc_E-mails#Anti-Pmurt</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I felt it appropriate to change my profile photo back to the filtered one for what happened in France the while back with due respect of the continuing of Trump's most drastic and '''uncouth''' actions in office.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/January_2017_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''You, sir, are '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#Trump.2C_you_mocked_the_mentally-challenged</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''All of you are nothing but immature, borish, '''uncouth''', and damned Neanderthals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonic_Boom_Protests#Chris_Rages_On</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Not Sexual Fantasy; Friendships, You '''Uncouth''' Cad. Hmpf!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Unleashing_his_inner_Brit</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And as it Had been My fault on that #NationalGirlfriendTweet that started the whole mess, that was Why I chose whole-heartedly to Harass Me instead of Doopie or Anyone Else who was being harassed with the mis-content from Years Ago from me taken Out Of Context, Mind you, because Harassing Anyone at Anyone else’s Expense is Just Plain Wrong, Bullying, and '''Uncouth'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_tweets</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''And it was ignored by you that Talulah Bankhead coined the term for Tabitha, you '''Uncouth''' Twat.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Tabitha_addresses_CWC_flame_war</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I agree it is shameful of these people to have accounts just to haze at me and all others, Soo '''uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NightStar2891_tweets#Twitter_spam_for_Tabitha</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I miss Jessica. You Trolls Scared Her Off by either Hacking or Reporting her Facebook. You '''Uncouth''' Cads!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jessica_Quinn</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As demonstrated, Chris uses this word way more than any 21st century [[American]] would. Chris picked up this word from an MLP episode, where Applebloom and Applejack are talking about what the word "uncouth" means<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-SrQ-Oz1k4</ref>, seeing how this conversation alone is somehow a staple in the Brony subculture. Seeing how Chris is one of those many Bronies who sees more [[Night_Star#Chris_spills_the_beans|meaning]] in the show than it actually possesses, Chris picked up this term due to how foreign and smart it sounded to him.
</blockquote>

;unto
<blockquote>1. ''(preposition)'' Archaic or poetic form of the word "to".

<blockquote>''Now that it has been made fully clear to me, I am now able to devote myself fully '''unto''' you, Julie.''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''I am very devastated, due to my SHATTERED HEART that [[Mary Lee Walsh|XXXXX]] caused '''unto''' me!.''</blockquote>

Origin: Another one of Chris's autistic ways of sounding smart, possibly in imitation of the Bible. (c.f. ''[[Chris and hypocrisy|Do unto others...]]'') Chris uses this form more frequently than most English speakers of the 21st Century should, even when it sounds unwieldy.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== V ==
|-
|
;vaginatables

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia

<blockquote>''There is no quote to cite the use of this CWC-ism''</blockquote>

Origin: A strange hybrid of the words "vagina" and "vegetables". Used in Chris's e-mail adress "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/China#Vaginatables</ref></blockquote>

;vege-marmite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Vegemite

<blockquote>''Certainly not a '''vege-marmite''' sanwich. Lol''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-372</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A retarded pun made by Chris to state his distaste for veggie marmite. Coincidentally, vegemite is essentially marmite, yeast extract from brewing beer turned into a pungent, salty paste, with vegetables and spices added in.<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegemite</ref></blockquote>

;vestite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A transvestite person.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and '''Vestites'''; ID as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the above post, Chris intended to write the words "transgender" and "transvestite" in the same sentence without duplicating the trans suffix. He did so by adding a space between the prefix and the respective endings.</blockquote>

;[[Virgin with Rage|Virgin with rage]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An individual who is sexually frustrated

<blockquote>''Tell me why
I'm stuck as a '''virgin with rage'''!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/So_Need_a_Cute_Girl</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Even after allegedly having sex with [[Mia Hamm]], the idea of being a virgin and not having a sweetheart pushes Chris's buttons. This gets so bad, that he might even rage after he's lost a potential sweetheart.</blockquote>

;[[Virginia is for Virgins|Virginia is for virgins]]

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase that pushes the strange idea that the citizens of Virginia won't allow Chris to get any china solely due to his autism.

<blockquote>"'''VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS''', NOT LOVERS!"</blockquote>

Origin: A butchering of the phrase "Virginia is for Lovers". Apparently, this strange idea has started since attending PVCC, with him leaving attraction signs everywhere, only to have all of them destroyed by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] afterward.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Virginia_is_for_Virgins#Origins</ref>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== W ==
|-
|

;Walter Grisby
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A man's name often employed in acts of random-access humor.

<blockquote>''"Is this '''Walter Grisby'''? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what? DAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"''<ref>[[Random-access humor]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The retconned name of the character formerly known as [[Wes Iseli]].

Origin: Unknown; thought by some to be a reference to the Cartoon Network show ''Ed, Edd n Eddy''. A character in the PC game ''The Sims 3'' goes by the name of Walter Grisby, but the game's release post-dates Chris's first uses of the term by some years.
</blockquote>

; Warroir of Love
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an advocate for spreading love and peace.

<blockquote>''"People! You do not understand! By Not blocking the Trolls, you are Promoting Hatred; They don't always side with Love. I Am '''Warroir of Love'''."''<ref>[[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/902236285389111297]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misspelling of the word "warrior". Chris considers himself a "warrior of love" because he believes that he is the [[Chris and kindness|voice of kindness]]. Most likely derived from the derogatory term "Social Justice Warrior", a term used for individuals who advocate for social justice and equality.
</blockquote>

;well-breasted
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Having large breasts.

<blockquote>''And her image dawned upon me in my imagination, starting out as the '''well-breasted''' pink electric-hedgehog (Pok'emon) with the long Raichu-like tail, I drew her outfit onto her in red and Battery-Charged Blue.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Rosechu|CWCipedia article on Rosechu}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusion between "well-endowed" and "large-breasted".
</blockquote>

;[[Women's rights]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The right for women to strip down without interference.

2. ''(noun)'' The right for women to not be depicted with a [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]].

Origin: Chris's understanding of sexism is botched up beyond belief. Chris believes that sexism only consists of any type of aggression or abuse towards women, and that it doesn't involve any kind of unfair depiction of women, like that all women like to strip down to their bare bodies and that all they care about is sex, shopping, and cooking.

</blockquote>

;wooden nickel
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Acoustic guitar.

<blockquote>''I got the idea of the challenge from him COPYING me playing Boston's "More Than A Feeling" on Guitar Hero on his old '''Wooden Nickel'''; if he wants to copy on Guitar, he may as well be challenged in a Sing-Off.''<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In real life, a wooden nickel is a now defunct form of currency used during the Great Depression. His use probably refers to the phrase "don't take any wooden nickels" - that is, he is calling the acoustic guitar a semi-worthless imitation of his Guitar Hero controller.
</blockquote>

;worse
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Severely; extremely, in an adverse manner

<blockquote>''IMHO, having Seinor Citizens for Parents throughout your whole life is no picnic; they are '''WORSE''' Overprotective.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
|-
|
;wrath
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Great [[Chris and anger|anger]] or rage. Considered one of the [[Chris and religion|Seven Deadly Sins]].

<blockquote>''Apparently, my, uh, heed of warning towards Vivian has gone unheard or otherwise SHE DID NOT REALIZE THE FURY OF MY '''WRATH'''''<ref>[[Sign Destruction Video]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Strength sufficient to lift an office chair.

<blockquote>''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY '''WRATH'''!!''<ref>[[Power]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==X==
|-
|
;X2-checking
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Double Checking
<blockquote>''Just '''X2-checking''' if you got the drawing I left you.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-35#post-2511049]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Comes from x2 meaning times two, which means double to Chris.

</blockquote>
;XXXXX
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' censorship of the word "bitch"
<blockquote>''Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM VERY ANGRY AT THAT '''XXXXX'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Diary</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Chris's only instance of this peculiar censorship is in his [[diary]]. In it, Chris repeatedly refers to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as an "XXXXX", clearly as a censorship of the word "bitch". Why Chris chose to replace all of the letters in the word with the capital letter "X", instead of using asterisks remains a mystery.</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Y ==
|-
|
;y'all
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(pronoun)'' indicating second person plural.

<blockquote>''"'''Y'all''' are free to stay here in one or so of their bedrooms for free, and y'all get fed too. Consider this a second chance for a good life which Christian offers to y'all; seek good employment after y'all get your strength rebuilt. ... I'll go check y'all in, then I have to finish saving the world."''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_68|Issue 10 Page 68}} [[Ultra Sonichu]] to the [[Basement Rosechus]], on a '''single page'''</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''It would be appreciated if '''y'all''' can book the flight for me, because I'm unsure about my family's current financial status, and my social's being saved for my own bills.''"<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga]] </ref></blockquote>
Origin: Derived from "you all", originating from the dialect of the Southern United States (and found in [[niggos|black communities]] outside the South). Often considered substandard English, Chris even uses this in formal written situations. Also overused in the [[comic]] to the point of absurdity.
</blockquote>
|-
|
;y'all should know me by now
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction to complete strangers.

<blockquote>'''''Y'all should know me by now''', but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, back on March 17th, 2000.''<ref name=csm/></blockquote>
Origin: His second message on YouTube, addressed to the ED trolls. He would use it several more times after this, possibly making this into his tagline. The introduction is made under the assumption that Chris is [[Chris and his Ego|already well-known]].
</blockquote>

;young at heart

<blockquote>1. ''(noun, attributive)'' An individual with childlike characteristics; a childish person.

<blockquote>''I am '''Young at Heart'''; a concept I have kept within myself since childhood.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''We, the '''Young at heart''' stand alongside our Liked and Cared others.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris can't seem to tell the difference between being a child at heart, and being childish. In his mind, people who are considered childish actually lead a more exciting life, since he believes that more childlike people are willing to show off their [[kindness]] and are generally more eccentric. In reality, adults who are "young at heart" generally have a somewhat innocent outlook of life and are generally interested in things considered suitable for children, yet understand their responsibilities as adults.
</blockquote>
|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Z ==
|-
|
[[Image:ZapToTheExtreme.png|thumb|200px]]
;zap to the extreme

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Go out and be brave.

<blockquote>''Go! Sonichu! Go out and '''zap to the extreme'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 0]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''Now everyone stay green and go out and '''zap to the extr-r-r-r-r-eme'''. Have a lovely day.'' <ref>[[A New, Fun Trick!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase is first used on the cover of [[Sonichu 0]], where Chris's mary sue character tells Sonichu to "zap to the extreme" as if Chris and Sonichu were in a bona fide [[Pokémon]] tournament. Chris would then end up using this phrase time and again, usually completely out of context of its original meaning.
</blockquote>

;zapbud

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A fictitious flower found in the Sonichu canon; Rosechu's favorite flower.

<blockquote>''Oh, Rosechu, you are as beautiful as a rose, though a '''Zapbud''' is the flower that heals your woes.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Ode_to_Rosechu</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Essentially the result of Chris attempting to create a mythology around his Sonichu comics, Chris created some of his own flora as well. Because of how "zapping" seemed to be a very common theme in the earlier issues of Sonichu, Chris thought about naming his flora after this one theme.

2. ''(noun)'' a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Yes, my blossoming '''zapbud'''. That's why we are here.''<ref>[[Sonichu 0]]</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

==References==

<references/>

{{CWC-isms}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

File:Mass Debate.jpg

2018-07-12T14:04:42Z

MindHit: UN Syria Security Council Debate

UN Syria Security Council Debate

CWC-isms

2018-07-08T15:46:11Z

MindHit: /* N */

<center>{{Honest}}</center>

One of [[Chris]]'s most notorious features is his strange vocabulary. Like many children who don't feel comfortable referring to [[Honest Content|adult concepts]] directly, Chris often resorts to creating cutesy euphemisms for a lot of words that anyone else his age would generally use with little reservation, which is common with autistic people. While some of them are understandable — after all, nobody would really relish discussing their [[Butt garments|diapers]] — others, such as "[[tobacky]]" instead of "tobacco", only serve to turn an otherwise normal sentence into an advertisement for Chris's childish nature. Others are attempts to be clever that fail miserably, for example, he refers to [[semen]] as "[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|navy]]", because semen sounds like sea men, [[Random-access humor|get it?]] Combine this with the idiosyncratic speech patterns that are common among [[autism|autistics]], and you get his so-called '''CWC-isms'''.

CWC-isms may be combinations or butchered versions of words or phrases that already exist, entirely new words, commonplace words that he uses repeatedly in a peculiar or obsessive way, or entirely new phrases that Chris often has to explain afterwards because nobody knows what he's talking about.

==Primary categories of CWC-isms==
There are 5 main types of CWC-isms:
# '''CWC-neologism''' - a ''new'' word or phrase, which didn't exist before, and was first ''created by Chris''. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#L|Lovehogs]]'', a portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehogs".
# '''CWC-euphemism''' - a ''preexisting'' word or phrase, which Chris for some strange reason gave a ''totally different meaning'' than it was meant to. Example: ''[[Duck]]'', meant to denote a bird, Chris uses it to denote his penis.
# '''CWC-anachronism''' - an ''obscure'' word or phrase which Chris has learned somewhere and now likes to utter pretty often, and which ''became characteristic'' for Chris's way of speaking/writing. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#I don't care for|I don't care for smth.]]'', a phrase Chris uses almost every time he expresses hate for something or someone.
# '''CWC-misspelling''' - only the ''most notable'' of Chris's ''misspellings'': those, which became characteristic for Chris's way of writing. Example: ''[[Geinus]]'', what he deems himself to be.
# '''Other shit''' - or Miscellaneous.
These 5 Main Types of CWC-isms are here to help you determine, if a word or phrase is a CWC-ism. If it fits the first 4 types, it most probably is. If it doesn't, it most probably isn't. Only the most important and notable of exclusions go into the 5th Type.

__NOTOC__

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; center:0">{{Alphabet ToC}}</div>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |
==#==
|-
|
;[[4-Cent Garbage]]
<blockquote>
1. (''noun'') The headquarters of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4-Chan]] trolls in [[Sonichu]].

<blockquote> ''You will recognize her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of '''4-cent-garbage''' will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==A==
|-
|
;abreast
<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') full of; filled with.

<blockquote>''It was not until after saving the city from the forces of Count Graduon and his minions, that she realized her form's new assets. And she was '''abreast''' with delight and glee when she found not the Male Part, but a Vagina! grin emoticon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2015_Facebook_posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''In fact, while I am fairly educated about Tribadism and '''abreast''' with theories, I would appreciate some experience with a lesbian or two who knows what she likes to enlighten me better, including on sensual massage and all that.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2015_Facebook_posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Like with many other words he isn't so familiar with, Chris uses this word in order to sound smart, failing to realize that the word "abreast" actually means "adjacent" <ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/abreast</ref>. A possible confusion with the word "abound".</blockquote>

;Adult Swim
<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') pornographic or otherwise "NSFW"; containing [[Honest Content|adult content]].

<blockquote>''She still has a great drawing style, even for the '''Adult Swim''' section."<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/night-star-delivers-christines-side-of-the-story.33062/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refers to the Cartoon Network block, [[Adult Swim]]. Chris seemed to only consider the "Adult" part of this block's name, and therefore assumed he could use this phrase to describe anything that's "adult" to him.

</blockquote>

;adulterous
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Of an [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|adult]] and mature nature

<blockquote>''Originally it was supposed to be like, you know, like ages 7 and up, but then I end up going to the content, uh, it could be considered, be like, be like definitely be considered '''adulterous'''.''<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: usually used to describe people who [[Ivy|cheat]] on their [[Blanca Weiss|partners]] (i.e. guilty of adultery), Chris only notices the "adult" component of the word.

2. ''(adjective)'' Insult of unclear nature
<blockquote>''Heeeeey, folks! It's me, [[Clyde Cash]]. I am the ruler of the internet and the internet trolls. I am an '''adulterous''' foe, a bastard and a self-righteous idiot who spends his time wallowing and trolling the one Christian Weston Chandler, and making up a whole bunch of dadgum rumors all over the internet!''<ref>[[100 2267]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris simply throws out the insult without a clear understanding of the word. Possibly referring to Clyde taking [[PandaHalo]] from Chris, though this is more aptly described as cuckoldry.

</blockquote>

;an' anurr thing
<blockquote>
1. ''(Phrase, transitionary)'' Signifies that Chris wishes to make another point about a subject he is discussing, and that he wishes he were Peter Falk.

<blockquote>''An' anurr thing...CHRIS. Your for real- your real name, as I have been told by Kacey, is only Chris Chandler! No "-tian," no "-topher," just Chris! So, admit that. '''An' anurr thing''', I NAME is NOT IAN! BRANDON!!! SOMETHING!!!!!''<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: a corruption of "and another thing". Used constantly when Chris is angry.

</blockquote>
;[[Anchuent Prophecy|anchuent]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Anything that is archaic in the ''Sonichu'' canon.

<blockquote>
''Well, what's this? I'm havin' an upgrade? Huh! Huh! My- my powers are given me the ability to fly with my wings attached to my head! It's like a w- it's like an add-on! That's optional! Huh! Must have been done by '''Anchuent''' Powers, so awesome I can fly now! Huh!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially, "anchuent" was taken to be a misspelling of the word "ancient" given Chris's [[Chris and English|poor grasp of the English language]]. Over time, however, it was revealed that "anchuent" was meant to be a portmanteau of the words "ancient" and "Sonichu", adding the "chu" part of "Sonichu" into the word "ancient". <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook</ref> </blockquote>

;and such
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items; to add to a list.

<blockquote>''At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera '''and such'''.''<ref>[[CWC Blog|Cwcipedia captain's log, 25 November 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris understands the term's meaning, but uses it superfluously.
</blockquote>

;artery

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' art.

<blockquote>''Good evening, but between this and the, uh, oh, and the other clips I would like to present you, uh, a few examples of hand '''artery'''.''<ref>[[CWC - Hand Drawn Original]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Not to be confused with the term for blood vessels. Chris doesn't seem to realize "art" is already a noun and doesn't need the suffix.
</blockquote>

;as such

<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' In the manner previously described.

<blockquote>''They just hated me because they don't, they did not understand people with autism. And so they tortured me '''as such'''.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris overuses this phrase to the point of self-parody. He's either tacking it on to fill space when he can't think of the next thing to say, or he's peppering it into his language in a feeble attempt to sound intelligent.
</blockquote>

;[[Attraction Location|attraction location]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any place Chris may sit to gain the attention of any passing women, only to get promptly kicked out afterward.

<blockquote>''Also, as of early November, I was reemitted into the Fashion Square Shopping Center, and since Mid-December, I totally left the UVA as an '''Attraction Location'''.
''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having a very difficult socializing with women, thought that sitting around in a certain place and soliciting himself would be a better alternative. Therefore, it would make sense to him to sit in a location with many people in order to gain the attention of several women. </blockquote>

;attraction time

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The time that is spent at an attraction location

<blockquote>''Then, on my next visit to the mall, I felt seriously depressed about what had happened the other day; it killed my '''attraction time'''''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;audio-sonic feeling

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the arousing feeling caused by getting hit by sound waves

<blockquote>''Here is a most '''audio-sonic feeling'''. While at the club last night, the music was loud, maybe reverberating or echoing. The music and beats literally shook up my rack! I actually Felt the music playing and reverbing within my breasts, almost like my breasts had become a pair of speakers. It Felt Amazing and Arousing!
''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/cwcville/photos/a.447204945915.244245.167832525915/10152771303590916/?type=3&theater</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As shown in the quote above, Chris believed that he was experiencing arousal through feeling the soundwaves on his body. In actuality, sound, a vibration<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound</ref>, creates pressure. The higher the amplitude of this wave (The louder the sound), the more pressure gets created from the wave, thus a louder wave should be able to hit Chris given that he's a huge target, and it creates that "arousing" feeling, which is actually an alternation between high and low pressures, which hits his body.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== B ==
|-
|

;B-dog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Derogatory epithet for women.

<blockquote>''Then that [[Mary Lee Walsh|'''B-Dog''']] ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Retarded censorship of the word "bitch". [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is implied to say this in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], when she shouts "BEEE..!!!" at [[Silvana]].<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_8/Page_95|Issue 8 Pages 94-95}}</ref>
</blockquote>

;bally
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' round; having the texture of a perfectly round ball.

<blockquote>''I've always given her a "'''Bally'''-Scratch" where I stroke her head with all five fingers like as if I was gently squeezing a rubber ball.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2004-2006</ref></blockquote>

Origin: If one didn't know Chris was referring to his dog, Patti, and that he gives her a "Bally-scratch" on the head, one might conclude that he's fondling someone's genitals. Chris, [[CWC-isms#N|naive]] to how suggestive this sounds, gave this special kind of petting the name "Bally-scratching" because of how stroking her head felt like he was squeezing a rubber ball.</blockquote>

;Be Woman
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Be '''a''' woman.

<blockquote>''I am a Lesbian Transwoman; I am not confused or mentally ill about that; '''I Am Woman.'''''<ref>[[2017_tweets#Proud_to_be_a_feminist]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''How Dare You Insult and be so Inconsiderate of Her like that? '''She Is Woman'''; she would Never Revert Back.''<ref>[[NightStar2891_tweets#She_is_woman]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used regularly when Chris asserts his [[Tomgirl|transgender identity]], notable for the consistent lack of a proper article and capitalization of each word in the phrase. Originally only attested in the first person ("I Am Woman"), a post on Chris's [[Miss Night Star]] Twitter sockpuppet account uses the third person ("She Is Woman"). Technically first appears in [[Sonichu 8]] when [[The Incredible Lioness]] attacks [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], as the somewhat cliché musical reference [[wikipedia:I Am Woman|"I am woman, hear me roar!"]], which may have inspired Chris's broader use of the phrase.
</blockquote>



;[[Biological clock|biological clock]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Wikipedia:Circadian Rhythm|circadian rhythm]]

<blockquote>'''I have a lot of stored caffeene [sic] in my energy supply, and not only kept me on my toes, but has also messed up my fucking '''biological clock''' as well.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Biological_clock</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although technically not used incorrectly in this context, the phrase "biological clock" is used exclusively for women in their child-bearing years. Possibly a confusion with "internal clock".
</blockquote>

;blangry
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' [[Chris and anger|Angry]].

<blockquote>''Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''BLANGRY'''! ''<ref>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Given Chris's belief that he has [[Chris and English|mastered the English language]] and his [[speech impediment]], it's likely he fucked up saying angry.
</blockquote>

;blue-printed
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Skilled in engineering.

<blockquote>''I like many others, was born a foal; to a '''blue-printed''' Pegasus and a country tomboy earth mare.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot_20171019-235945_01-png.299275/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris portrayed Bob's Pony Counterpart in [[Sonichu 12-9]] as an engineer, just like the real [[Bob]]. Due to Chris's limited vocabulary, Chris knew very little words he could use to describe Bob's profession. Derived from the word "blueprints", the plans set for the design of a product. </blockquote>

;[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Single; particularly used on women.

<blockquote>''Ahh, well, it's been over a year and ten months now since I started my sweetheart-search; I still haven't found a '''boyfriend-free'''-caring-smoke-free-non-alcoholic-white-girl-near-my-age to build a relationship with from the ground up.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;Buddha belly
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Excess fat that gives a person a [[obesity|very round appearance]].

<blockquote>''Okay, well, I admit I do have a '''Buddha belly''', but I am not lazy, I do get out and about, I exercise, I jog and work out, and I eat healthy.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Buddha|Buddha]]" is a title given to several legendary figures in [[Wikipedia:Buddhism|Buddhism]]. In this case, Chris is making reference to [[wikipedia:Budai|Budai]], who is often known as "Fat Buddha". Chris presumably picked up the phrase from the [[Family Guy]] episode "To Love and Die in Dixie."
</blockquote>

;buh bye bay nose
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' but if anybody knows.

<blockquote>''If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in da bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose''' the whereabouts of the... [[JERKS|jerk]]... and just happens to be nearby... or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.''<ref>[[Christian's Update 13 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
;[[Butt garments|butt garment]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' adult diaper; typically one used to control Chris's [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontenence]].

<blockquote>''The doctor corrected that they were liners; he never called them diapers. Neither did Chris- he called them “'''butt garments'''”.''</blockquote>

Origin: To avoid embarrassment from stating that he shits himself constantly, and uses diapers, Chris refers to his adult diapers as butt garments.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== C ==
|-
|
[[File:CWCtrek1.png|400px|right|thumb|The Autistic Generation]]

;C-Log
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Captain's Log.

<blockquote>'''''C-Log''' February 4th, 2010. First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make.''<ref>[[I am Alive]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;C Ville (or C-Ville)
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' [[Charlottesville, VA]].

<blockquote>''Look, you're going to back in '''C-Ville''' tomorrow, I can meet you at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes, what time is good for our meeting?''<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Generic term for any city whose name fits the pattern of beginning with "C" and ending with "ville," e.g., [[CWCville]], Charlottesville, etc.

<blockquote>''And when you diss Cwcville you disf- you diss every "'''C Ville'''" within these United States.''<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;[[Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The typical opening for a vlog video Chris makes to adress the fanbase, which includes the date of production.

<blockquote>'''''Captain's Log'''. Stardate: September... 24th, 2008.''</blockquote>

Origin: One may come to the conclusion that Chris may have picked up this phrase from Star Trek, however, Chris is not a fan of the Star Trek franchise, nor has he seen any clips of the show<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_3</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_14</ref>. It is more likely that Chris must have picked up the phrase from cartoons like [[Family Guy]], which references Star Trek, considering how he watched the show religiously.</blockquote>

;carniverous
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' evil, vengeful.

<blockquote>''On today's show, we will take a close-up look at the '''carniverous''' jerkops.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic5P29.htm</ref></blockquote>Origin: A misspelling of "carnivorous". It is unknown what word Chris meant to use here, but "carnivorous" certainly wasn't it.</blockquote>

;[[China|china]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Female genitalia

<blockquote>''I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, uncomfortable with directly saying the word "vagina", decided to alter the word to a cutesy, similar-sounding word.</blockquote>

;coldest shoulder

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' to rebel.

<blockquote>''Those people like me at the very least, NOT counting all of the deceitful people I have had the displeasure of knowing who turned '''Coldest Shoulder''' Against me and STARTED all of the Online Hatred.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/April_2012_Facebook_posts</ref>

''One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time Manajerks who gives her elders the '''coldest of shoulders'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Coffee_Place</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the phrase "turning a cold shoulder", a phrase used for the negligence of another person<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/turn-a-cold-shoulder-to</ref>. </blockquote>

;[[Comeuppance|comeuppance]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Male orgasm.
<blockquote>''...I feel my '''comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my [[semen]] is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop. (...) And right after I'd given you my first round, my first '''comeuppance''', you would take, you would reach down, and you would take your face away from my penis...''<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' [[Semen]], usually immediately after ejaculation. ''See also: [[CWC-isms#N|Navy]]''
<blockquote>''Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first dosage of my '''comeuppance'''!''<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses the sexual slang "cum" as a [[For Julie's Eyes Only|verb]] for orgasm, but he may not realize it can also be a noun referring to ejaculate. In his mind, "comeuppance" apparently serves that purpose, viz., "that which has come/cum up."

In the real world, "comeuppance" is an English noun meaning [[Wiktionary:comeuppance|outcome which is justly deserved]] based upon the common verb "come," i.e., the state of coming forward to receive judgment. He is either unaware of the original definition of the word or does not appreciate the irony of telling women he's going to give them comeuppance.

Note that the contexts of the real word and Chris's version are different. When a woman is rebuked, she receives her comeuppance; when a woman gets Chris's hot load in her face, she receives ''his'' "comeuppance."
</blockquote>

;crooks
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Those who may steal Chris's intellectual property for malicious purposes. ''(pl.)''

<blockquote>''I aways keep my eyes open for '''crooks''' who take my [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]]'s name and put it in offensive use!''<ref>''[[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg|116-CWCCop.jpg]]''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' websites, and even words on websites which communicate lies about Chris.

<blockquote>''And that [[ED]] page is one of those crooks. Every page--every word on the discussion page is a '''crook'''.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A finishing move Chris does on his adversaries in order to "curse" them, public or otherwise. Performed in the same way it is in Dragonball.

<blockquote>''Hmmm...'''Curse-ye-ha-me-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NO_D***_WAY,_IMPOSTOR!!!</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes that he possesses [[Chris and reality#Magic|magical powers]]. Typically, these so-called magical powers would be used whenever an enemy gets in the way of whatever he wants to do, since Chris is too afraid to actually fight anyone. Therefore, he will rely on this magical power in order to gain control of whoever is giving him trouble.</blockquote>

;CWC-sense
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The ability to sense Chris's presence.

<blockquote> ''Seriously though, awesome timing coming in, just as we, and Chris, had just finished writing the lyrics...was your '''CWC-sense''' tingling?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== D ==
|-
|
[[File:Daupdate.jpg|thumb|400px|[[Megan]], comparing Chris's [[Chris and his Ego|attitude]] to [[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]].]]

;D.A.
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Unexplained, presumably a substitution to avoid the word "dumbass." Most likely ''not'' "District Attorney," although equally applicable to [[Marvey Blaziken]].

<blockquote>''You are obviously a troll trying to pick on my nerves; nice try, '''D.A.'''''<ref>[[Mailbag 15]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris intermittently decides to self-censor his profanities for the benefit of younger readers.
</blockquote>

;da
<blockquote>1. ''(article)'' [[Wikipedia:Eye dialect|Eye dialect]] spelling of the word [http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the the].

<blockquote>''Y'all know me as [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta Sonichu]], '''da''' DJ with da power!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], page 43</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris writes "the" as "da" when he intends for his characters (or himself) to sound laid-back and cool. This is most notable with Jamsta Sonichu, who is supposed to sound like a hip radio DJ and/or a [[Niggos|black man]]. Chris may intend at times to do the same thing in his verbal communications, although his [[speech impediment]] makes it difficult to tell when he actually means to say "da."
</blockquote>

;Da Update

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The latest news.

2. ''(phrase)'' The most recent fail Chris is responsible for.

<blockquote>''Hey, guys! What's '''da update'''?''</blockquote>

Origin: Dialogue used by Chris, in an exceedingly awkward attempt to sound casual, in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. As Chris's [[fans]] have searched the Internet for the latest news from our hero, "da update" has become shorthand for "the latest [[Relics of Fail|failure]] Chris has committed." The phrase became legendary when posted above the Chris-chan talk page on [[ED]] (eventually the page was locked, forcing mass migration to the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]]).

</blockquote>

;[[Darling|darling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used on female friends to obtain their love and trust.

<blockquote>Thank you, Doopie '''Darling'''. :)<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2017_tweets#Thanks.2C_darling</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, so hellbent on being [[Chris and kindness|kind]] to just about any [[CWC-isms#N|not-troll]] he meets, thinks it would be appropriate to refer to women he doesn't know outside of the internet by pet names to sound like he really cares for them, despite it being creepy to most other people. Chris's main justification for using this word on women who don't bond with him is that the actor [[Wikipedia:Tallulah Bankhead|Tallulah Bankhead]] used this word a lot, ignoring the fact that she only does this while on set.</blockquote>

;[[Dating education|Dating Education]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' formal education in schools about dating people of the opposite sex.

<blockquote>''Also, in addition, while we also fully support Sexual Education in every high school, Christian Weston Chandler also highly recommends, and would gladly support, '''Dating Education''' classes, because, while Sex Ed is great for the eventual, well-earned intercourse after 3 or more dates, it is vital to learn what to do before that moment. It should be well0taught how to approach and ask one’s member of the opposite gender out for the very first date.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:DatingEducation.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The lack of "Dating Education classes" is something that Chris used to complain about all of the time, because he's simply incapable of finding a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]], and that it would be a great advantage for people of his type to learn how to obtain some [[CWC-isms#C|china]]. Chris doesn't understand that [[Chris and socialization|the way he behaves around people]], especially those [[Women|of the opposite sex]] has anything to do with it, and therefore should see a therapist to correct his socialization skills.</blockquote>

;detail
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A thing of importance that Chris cannot recall at any given moment.

<blockquote>''I do not have the appropriate calm state of mind to make time to READ those numerous upon numerous small-print '''details''', much less memorize them.''<ref>[[Wikipedia#May 2009 drama]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' Something that Chris does not understand.

<blockquote>''There was one I remember from then where the essay had a lot of offensive content, including smoking, and I spoke my mind on how offended I was of it. Plus other details I misunderstood that he was expecting in the assignments.'' <ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ability to retain information is questionable (unless it's about [[Sonichu (comic)|something]] [[Lego|he]] [[Pokémon|obsesses]] [[PS3|over]]). As such, he "misunderstands" and "forgets" a lot of glaringly important things, such as [[Father call|how to live on his own]] and [[Jackie E-mails 2|the fact that he cheated on Ivy]].
</blockquote>

;Did the do, to do the do
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To have sexual intercourse, likely under deceptive conditions

<blockquote>''[[Lovely Weather|Lovely]] was hot. She mistook me for myself and we went home from work that night, so Lovely and I '''did the do''', and it was awesome!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_2|Issue 10 Page 2}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Childish alteration of the common euphemism for sex, "doing it". Ripped off from [[Wikipedia:Emission_Impossible|an episode]] of [[Family Guy]].
</blockquote>

;dige
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''My name's [[Inos]]... wha' chu up to? I am eclectic on this hedge... high on the hog... you wan' som' of this '''dige''', mon?''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_70|Issue 10 Page 70}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended to be part of a coded reference to "Sonichu, Electric Hedgehog Digimon". It is not known why he changed the reference from "Pokemon" to "Digimon".
</blockquote>

;[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Used as a reference to Chris's fecal incontinence.

<blockquote>''I have NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF '''DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/IRC_(20_January_2009)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase during an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]] with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]] after they alluded that Chris has a fondness to wear women's underwear. In order to confirm his straightness, he retorted by admitting the fact that he has "NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS". Soon after, due to how humorous the phrase sounded, it became a shorthand for trolls to refer to Chris's fecal incontinence.</blockquote>

;disabled of crafting
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Too apathetic to work

<blockquote>''Since last December with the Lulu.com problems (resolved), that has left me with a bad emotional and mental scar. Leaving me feeling '''disabled of crafting'''...''<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy to work]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris being defensive when a customer asked how he could be trusted to follow through on an order, when he had failed to send out orders from his Etsy shop, which resulted in his seller account getting closed.
</blockquote>

;Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Backstabber

<blockquote>''You could be a Better, More Supportive Friend, instead of a '''Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic''' with your sweetheart!!!''<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-10-5-mad-at-kim-wilson.34948/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A butchering of the title of the Adult Swim cartoon, [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]].</blockquote>

;[[Duck|duck]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's penis

<blockquote>''MY '''DUCK''' HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially "duck" was taken to be a typo of "dick" since the "u" and "i" keys are close together. It was later revealed that Chris was using this negolism as an intentional euphemism to refer to his own penis.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mumble_8</ref>

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]]</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== E ==
|-
|

;elbow-greased

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Earned from hard work and exercise

<blockquote>''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism. It appears in his [[resume]], where he lists "elbow-greased strength" as one of his "functional skills"''</blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the idiom, "elbow-grease", a figure of speech humorously used for tasks that involve manual labor only. </blockquote>

;[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]''

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the characters found in Sonichu which are hybrids of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] characters and/or Pokemon.

<blockquote>''Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the '''Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon''' on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_resume</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Despite the name, a majority of "Electric Hedgehog Pokemon" are neither Pokemon or hedgehogs. This misnomer may come from Chris's original characters being hybrids of two Sonic characters, both of whom are hedgehogs (Sonic and Amy Rose) and two Pokémon (Pikachu and Raichu).</blockquote>

;emotional differences

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A strong disagreement between two people.

<blockquote>''I told you! It was, it was because of, uh, '''emotional differences.'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#The_Shit_Hits_the_Fan</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris mentioned that he got terminated from [[Wendy's]] in the [[Father Call]], due to their "emotional differences", possibly meaning that a heated argument between him and his employer ensued.</blockquote>

;empirical
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' resorting to experience to gain knowledge rather than through scientific means.

<blockquote>''So, throw away the book talk; be '''empirical''' and believe what you know is fact'' <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2012_Facebook_posts#Empirical</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris attributed the nearly opposite definition of the word to Jeremy Hilary Boob PhD, a character from [[Wikipedia:Yellow Submarine|''Yellow Submarine'']]. Considering this, Chris must have picked up this strange definition from the content in the Beatles Edition of ''Rock Band''.</blockquote>

;entendre

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Charisma or attraction

<blockquote>''Too much '''entendre'''?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the phrase "double entendre", a figure of speech used for words or phrases with a double meaning, [[Duck|typically]] [[Raincoat|with]] [[Mass Debating|one]] [[China|of]] [[Recycling|them]] [[Pickle|being]] [[Comeuppance|risque]].<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double%20entendre</ref> In English, the word "entendre" isn't typically used outside of the phrase itself, but in many other languages like French and Catalan, it is understood to mean "to hear" or "to understand". Chris, thinking he knows everything there is to know about the English language, once again thought he would sound smart by using this obscure word.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== F ==
|-
|
[[File:Fourboom.jpg|thumb|right|"G'Day welcome to Auschwitz"]]

;[[Fangs|fangs]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's canine teeth

<blockquote>''They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like '''fangs''' of a vampire, dog or something to me.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls#Your_understanding_me_fukky_.281_January_2009.29</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes his teeth to be unordinary compared to most other people's teeth. Because he believes his teeth to be menacing, he gave them the name "fangs". Once in a while, Chris would show off his decaying teeth to scare off his enemies. This usually works, although for the wrong reasons.</blockquote>

;faredoo
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection, imperative verb)'' Parting salutation, akin to "goodbye".

<blockquote>''Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. I bid you fond...'''faredoo'''. Adieu. Fond farewell adieu...''<ref>[[The MovingFoward videos]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Accidental portmanteau of "farewell" and "adieu".
</blockquote>

;fart-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb and perverted 

<blockquote>Ha Ha! Take THAT, you '''fart-minded''', jerk MALE among ALL fart-minded, jerk Males that make up the Majority of the Worldwide Male Population! -:D<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtWQTjXCDs</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the comment section of a Stopmotion Lego animation, where a ''Lego'' minifigure is in a sexual relationship with a ''Lego Friends'' minifigure. Throughout this video, the minifigure acts as what Chris believes most men to be like. At the end of the video, the Lego minifigure proceeds to fart, which disgusts the Lego Friends minifigure. Also a possible butchering of the phrase "brainfart", which is used to humorously refer to a moment of absentmindedness</blockquote>

;firstly
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' A word that indicates that Chris is about to tell someone why he's right. Often not followed by an enumerated list of reasons, despite the implication.

<blockquote>'''''Firstly''', Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills. and I'm High-Functionally Autistic''<ref>[[IRC_(02_January_2009)|IRC chat, 02 January 2009]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Use of "firstly" to begin a list, rather than "first," is a matter of dispute among linguistic fags. "Firstly" has fallen out of common use and tends to sound more formal, perhaps overly so. Chris seems to like this formality, probably because he thinks it sounds smart.
</blockquote>

;fondful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' fond

<blockquote>''Faithfully yours with '''fondful''' thoughts; Chris Chan.''<ref>[[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007|Chris's email to Megan Schroeder]], 06 July 2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently doesn't understand that "fond" is already an adjective by itself.
</blockquote>

;for good-like
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' final, but with the imagined possibility otherwise.

<blockquote>''And in June of 2008, he banned me from the store '''for good-like'''.''<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails|Chris's email to The Wallflower]], 18 February 2010</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusing modification of "for good".
</blockquote>

;foundate
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To dedicate, as in a monument or building.

<blockquote>''I, Christian Weston Chandler, re-'''foundate''' this monument that is the PAGE with MY SOLE HONEST TRUTH from my sound mind and heart.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#Captain.27s_Log.2C_Stardate:_June_6.2C_2009|2=Christian in his Own Words}}.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely a portmanteau of "found" and "dedicate", or a bizarre attempt to convert "foundation" into a verb.
</blockquote>

;four-boomerang-shaped symbol
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' minced oath for "[[Wikipedia:swastika|swastika]]," especially the ''Hakenkreuz'' symbol of the Nazi Party.

<blockquote>''Like Most People, I do not care much for Adolf; he was a terrible man, and even in jest, I WOULD NEVER want to portray him, much less, his '''four-boomerang-shaped symbol''' (I know what it is called, but I do not wish to type the word).''<ref>[[Mailbag 5#That wacky Hitler|Mailbag 5]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris was apparently afraid to say the word "swastika," probably for the same reason he used to fear using racial slurs.
</blockquote>

;[[Fuzzy-wuzzies|fuzzy-wuzzies]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The rewards of giving Chris compliments.

<blockquote>''Compliments will get you '''fuzzy-wuzzies'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Picked up from the children's book, ''[[A Warm Fuzzy Tale]]''.

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|prickly-wicklies]]
</blockquote>

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== G ==
|-
|
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|This is who Chris actually believes in.]]
;[[Gal pal|gal-pal]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a female friend.

<blockquote>''And also, I would like to give a shout-out to...Ivy, sweet '''gal-pal''' of mine...and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_18_March_2009_More_Updated</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Strangely enough, Chris rarely refers to any of his female friends as "friends", which stems from his belief that all female friends have the potential to be [[CWC-isms#S|sweethearts]]. Because of this, Chris refers to his female friends as his "girlfriends". To make it seem that he really cares for these "girlfriends", Chris refers to such women by a cutesy pet-name, namely "gal-pal".</blockquote>

;gawd
<blockquote>
1. ''(interjection)'' eye dialect of "god", Used in the place of "god" when it is used to express annoyance, shock, or pain.

<blockquote>''Life is f***ed up. (I had a real stressful Sunday afternoon) '''Gawd'''! Just... GAWD!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#STRESSFUL_SUNDAY._GAWD.21</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly meant to be used as a way past cool way to say "god" to add dramatic effect.</blockquote>

;gaybian
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a male lesbian

<blockquote>''Uh… simply put—and I am willing to say this… in sound mind and body: I… am a '''gaybian'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet</ref></blockquote>

Origin: With [[Clyde Cash]] threatening to harm [[Julie]], him forcing Chris to "come out of the closet", and Chris having no clue how to handle the situation, Chris thought it would be clever to admit he was gay, but yet he isn't attracted to men. Thus, he tacked on the word "gay" onto "lesbian" to create the word "gaybian".</blockquote>

;geinus
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a genius

<blockquote>''Robotnik! Robotnik! I'm a mad '''geinus'''! Robotnik, Robotnik!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_1</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An accidental misspelling of "genius", this CWC-ism is the result of Chris's ability to spell, or lack thereof. In his futile attempts to spell words with "eni", he substitutes this with "ein", possibly due to his habit of spelling words phonetically.</blockquote>

;give birth, give the birth
<blockquote>
1. ''(verb)'' To transfer possession of the state of having been born, by bearing as offspring.

<blockquote>''My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only '''gave the birth'''--gave me birth at their ages...which my mother is sixty-six, currently, and my father is currently eighty. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth...then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of--for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early [[1980s]].''<ref>[[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to think that a sentence like "Barbara gave birth to Christian" is grammatically equivalent to a sentence like "Barbara gave Go-bots to Christian."
</blockquote>

;go make a rhyme
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate that he is in a [[Chris and writing|poetic]] mood.

<blockquote> ''Oh, Back Off, '''go make a rhyme'''. Love will come your way in good time.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/913230475774369794</ref> Keep Heart, Have hope and faith. Life is a coinkie-dink strafe. Have an open heart, don’t be afraid. Your sweetie is likely in your friendship parade.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris intended to write a rhyme in order to sound poetic in a tweet, continuing with the rhyming schtick in several subsequent ones. Due to his own laziness, the best Chris could come up with in terms of words that rhyme with "time" is "rhyme".
</blockquote>

;[[Godjesus]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(shorthand)'' God and Jesus Christ.

<blockquote> ''As I have guide, as I was guide [sic] by, uh, God and Jesus. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, '''Godjesus''' were mad at me, so, even though she r-, even though she requested the recent items of question, sex-, [quietly] sexual stuff--videos and pictures--I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Matthew_5:27,_CWC_Confessions</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And also, who I'd like to thank, '''GodJesus''', our God and our Lord and savior, for their support, for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow, I am guided by Jesus.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_9_April_2009</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is somewhat aware of the Holy Trinity (Holy Spirit, Son, and Father), the three forms that God takes in mainstream Christianity. Despite accepting Jesus as the son of God, Chris believes that God and Jesus are essentially the same entity. As a result, whenever he mentions God, he is never reluctant to mention Jesus in the same sentence. Because of this, Chris made this CWC-ism as a shorthand of "God and Jesus".
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== H ==
|-
|
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris does NOT look like Chris Farley]]
;hand-drawing
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An original drawn image, as opposed to a facsimile of that image.

<blockquote>''I mean, does that look like a printout to you? No! It's a '''HAND-DRAWING'''! It's the original hand-drawing of the back cover I constantly used! Among all the other hand drawings on my SHELF! In my BINDERS! IN THIS ROOM! In this house!''<ref>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To sketch without the aid of digital technology, such as a computer.

<blockquote>''No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the '''hand-drawing''' and you draw everything on your PhotoShop with your computer mouse.''<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's process for producing his drawings is to draw them, by hand, on physical paper, and then scan the paper into his computer and use image editing software to add effects like lettering or (for the purpose of breaking the fourth wall) photographs. He takes comfort in the belief that ownership of the original paper drawings is evidence of his authorship and will frequently cite this in defense against perceived thieves and trolls.

Chris also thinks that drawing on a computer instead of paper is an inferior method of producing artwork; he thinks the results look "blocky and low-resolution," which probably speaks more to his [[:File:179-ShineSchuChara.jpg|his own experience using MSPaint]] than the artistic quality of, for example, [[Asperchu]]. The fact that a digital artist like Alec Benson Leary is nonetheless ''using his hands'' does not seem to have occurred to Chris.
</blockquote>

;[[heart level]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his emotional state

<blockquote>''100% Change the number to change your '''heart level''' and you can write a sentence to indicate how you feel.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Heart_level</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The concept of the "heart level" most likely stems from Chris's inability to understand emotions. As an alternative, Chris tends to use video game terms in order to measure such emotions.</blockquote>

;heartsweet
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Rosey, as often as birds tweet, will you be my lovely '''heartsweet'''?''<ref>"[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Rearrangement of "sweetheart," possibly coined initially to provide more rhyming options in poetry. Chris primarily uses this term in Sonichu's dialogue, as the character's pet name for Rosechu. When speaking for himself, Chris tends to prefer "sweetheart," although the trolls use "heartsweet" in conversation with him.

''See also: [[sweetbolt]]''
</blockquote>

;heavyweight
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Stockboy; person employed to move heavy objects and perform other menial labor.

<blockquote>If she gets pregnant and can't work, then I would be working. I would be working VERY HARD AND HEAVILY. [...] If I have to I would be, get one of the '''heavyweights''', that just moves the boxes around the, stock the shelves at a grocery store.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' heavy.

<blockquote>I do not think Chris Farley looks like me at all, plus he was a LOT more '''heavyweight''' than me, and he was more wild than me.<ref>[[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, as usual, has to repurpose words rather than use the existing words that already mean what he wants to say.
</blockquote>

;[[HEXBox]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the video game consoles made by Microsoft, primarily the XBox 360.

<blockquote>I never cared for the '''HEXBox''', and frankly it LACKS heavily in comparison to the Wii and PS3, PLUS YOU HAVE TO PAY THEIR FEES TO EVEN GO ONLINE OR DOWNLOAD DEMOS WITH IT.</blockquote>

Origin: Due to his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Brand Loyalty]], Chris had an irrational hatred for the XBox, simply because of how much you've got to pay for it to access some of its content<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_5</ref>. Because Chris viewed this device as a curse to humanity, he tacked the word "hex", which is defined as being a curse, onto the original name of the console.</blockquote>

;hide behind/under his mother's skirt
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' To behave in a cowardly, immature fashion.

<blockquote>''You come to me now. Come face me like a man. Unless you want to continue being called a cow-a quivelling coward who '''hides under his mother's skirt'''.''<ref>[[Challenge for Clyde II]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An antiquated phrase alluding to children literally hiding behind their mother's skirts when frightened.
</blockquote>

;[[homo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male homosexual

<blockquote>''Yes; the '''Homos''' I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Common_Questions''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' homosexual

<blockquote>''Every one of you who thinks I'm '''homo''' and calls me that—-because I am not; I'm straight! I'm straight!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' relating to homosexuals

<blockquote>''Again, to reiterate the issue, THE GOD DAMN F***IN' '''Homo''' Ads MUST BE GONE!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Blog</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had a hatred for homosexuals, out of fear that he'll become one himself. Even uttering words like "gay" and "homosexual" make him uncomfortable.</blockquote>

;[[Honest Content|honest]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' NSFW, containing adult content.

<blockquote>''Parental Advisory - VERY '''HONEST''' content.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P97.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only has a slightly good understanding of what honesty is. However, Chris doesn't seem to understand when it's most appropriate to be honest. In his mind, to attract mates, he has to be honest all of the time, even if this includes instances of his sexual misadventures. Chris knows that he's not supposed to discuss such topics with ordinary people, so he would have to keep such things in secret. Therefore, in his mind, it would be the "honest" thing to do to discuss such actions.
</blockquote>

;Hurtful Truth Level
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A point at which honest criticism should be stopped so as to avoid hurting a person's feelings, regardless of the usefulness of the advice.

<blockquote>''And another thing, When constantly exceeding that '''Hurtful Truth Level''' to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in an email to Jackie after she had pointed out several glaring flaws in Chris's lifestyle and personality. Rather than take her criticism to heart and improve himself, he got angry and defensive, wishing that she would show sympathy for him instead.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== I ==
|-
|
[[File:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|thumb|right]]

;I can feel the cosmos
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Statement of achievement and oneness with the universe.

<blockquote>''I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better. '''I can feel the cosmos!''' Peace.''<ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by a line from the game Katamari Damacy, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmWxNFq6_3U "Oh, I feel it. I feel the cosmos."]
</blockquote>

;I got a fish

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Claim that one owns a fish.

<blockquote>'''''I got a fish!''' Would ya like to make a wish?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Got_A_Fish</ref>
''I got a fish Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish?''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expressed angrily when you wish to break someone apart to kill them

<blockquote>''Jason Kendrick Howell... you BASTARD! BASTARD! You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even DESCRIBE it! YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW, BUT... '''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!''' Goodbye!''<ref>[[Jason Kendrick Howell message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as a [[death threat]] to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he has hacked Sonichu.net.</blockquote>

;IBAChandler
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Abbreviation for "I be a chandler," i.e., "I am a person named 'Chandler.'"

<blockquote>''I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that '''IBAChandler''' account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.''<ref>[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(proper noun)'' [[YouTube]] username in use by Christian Weston Chandler during his conflict with [[Liquid Chris]], leading trolls to accuse Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]].

3. ''(proper noun)'' Name of a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' villain based upon Liquid Chris, ironically named for the real Chris's alias.

<blockquote>'''''I B A Chandler''', And I am here to copycatly sieze claim of you hedgehogs and this city from your absent mayor's domain.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 79</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by [[Bob Chandler]]'s license plate, "I B MR C" ("I be Mister C.").<ref>[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;ID
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Identifying.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and Vestites; '''ID''' as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly derived from ID meaning "Identification". </blockquote>

;[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|infinitely high boyfriend factor]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the extremely high probability that any woman Chris talks to is not [[CWC-isms#boyfriend-free|boyfriend-free]].

<blockquote>''With the '''infinitely high Boyfriend-Factor''', I am not fond of about 99.999999999996% of the total male population, with a margin-of-error of the 4 billionth of a percent (for about 100 men) of whom are okay acquaintences.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_Aug-Dec_2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In general, Chris will almost never find a sweetheart.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F</ref> Already aware of this fact, but not willing to admit he's not at all attractive to most women, Chris blames it on the fact that most men are "jerks", and that one probably is already dating the woman he's trying to latch onto.</blockquote>

;instinction

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An instance of something being used a certain way.

<blockquote>''Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all '''instinctions''' and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_English</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Once again an instance of Chris trying to sound smart by using a word that sounds foreign to him, made up or otherwise. The end result, however, gives the impression that Chris isn't familiar with the word "instances".

</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== J ==
|-
|
;janekop
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A female [[CWC-isms#jerkop|jerkop]].

<blockquote>''YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. SO SAYS THIS '''JANEKOP'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Feelings_of_the_election_results</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas the term "jerkop" is a portmanteau of the CWC-ism "jerk" and the word "cop", janekop is a portmanteau of the words "jane" and "cop". The word "jane" is a slang word for "woman". <ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jane</ref>
</blockquote>
;[[JERKS|jerk]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. Any man that Chris dislikes, particularly one that gets in the way of his LoveQuest.

<blockquote>''On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel '''jerks'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "jerk" is generally defined as "A person with unlikable or obnoxious qualities and behavior, typically mean, self-centered or disagreeable." <ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jerk#Etymology_1</ref>. As stated in the quote above, Chris believes that all men to be cruel, selfish, and overall unlikeable. Therefore, he views almost all men as jerks.
</blockquote>
;[[Jerkop|jerkop]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. An official of the law.

<blockquote>''I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a prepared speech to say to them stupid '''Jerkops'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Get-Tar_Region</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris views most officers of the law as jerks, due to how often they'd thwart his LoveQuest, the term is a portmanteau of "jerk" and "cop". Possibly a pun on the word "jerkoff", which is defined as being "a contemptible man". <ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/jerk--off</ref></blockquote>

;JULAAAAAAAY
<blockquote>''(interjection)'' 1. An expression used by Chris to indicate how much he'd love having sex for the first time with [[Julie]]

<blockquote>"Oh, Julie...'''JULAAAAAY''', JULAAAAAAAAAAY!!!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first shouted this infamous CWC-ism in the video [[For Julie's Eyes Only]], which he intended to share with only [[Julie]] to show what their first date would amount to, despite this breaking his Three Date Rule. Seeing how Chris was somewhat of a porn junkie,<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_Adam_%26_Eve_purchases</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Miyamoto_emails#Chris_Sets_the_Record_STRAIGHT</ref>, Chris must have picked up that during sexual intercourse, one of the people may shout the name of the other person in order to "spice up" the orgy. After the video got leaked, the term started to be used by trolls humorously, to the point where [[weens]] started using the phrase in excess, making the CWC-ism lose its luster.</blockquote>

</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== K ==
|-
|
[[File:Autistic Kicks Back.png|200px|thumb|The autistic kicking back!]]

;[[Kick the Autistic]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' America's favorite game

<blockquote>''I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC!"''' *sigh*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any action which involves doing something to Chris that he doesn't like

<blockquote>''And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC"''', then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#21_January</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' Any form of discrimination towards Chris for being [[autism|autistic]].

Origin: Chris had this paranoid idea that the whole world is going against him and his goals, solely due to his [[autism]]. In this sense, the fact that so many people supposedly wanted to thwart his goals made him feel like he was being "kicked" around.

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== L ==
|-
|

;[[Laughs Under Lucricities]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(backronym)'' backronym for "LULZ"

<blockquote>''Although, F.Y.I., "LULZ" is short for "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''"''<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris knows "lulz" is a variant of "LOL" and that it does not actually stand for anything, although he seems to think it must be written in all-caps anyway like an acronym. Originally he would simply say "LULZ" ''ought'' to stand for "Laughs Under Lucricities," but he soon began implying that it already does.<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2008|Email]] from Chris to Robert Simmons V on 12 August 2008</ref>

2. ''(noun)'' Any form of humor made at Chris' expense

</blockquote>

;lesbian soul
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' What Chris believes to be his true [[Chris and sexuality|sexuality]].

<blockquote>''I am an all-around, good natured, high-functioning autistic, Female '''Lesbian Soul''', and Transwoman, artist, gamer and creative type.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;level-up king
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Master of Pokemon, and possibly other card games.

<blockquote>''There must have been about 6 people including Chris and myself at the tourney and when he won he was jumping up and down a yelling "I'm the '''level up king'''!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mimms_and_Lucas_Q%26A#Follow_up</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before his permanent ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]], Chris would play games of Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh with some of the other customers. Despite his sick obsession with both games, Chris never developed any type of strategy to compete with other players, making it very difficult to succeed at the game, even when he played against small children. Eventually, when the shop was just down to six people, which included Chris, the manager, Mims, and Lucas, Chris did win a match against a relatively new player, and excitedly jumped up and down at this accomplishment like a child. Along with this, he shouted the phrase "I AM THE LEVEL-UP KING!"</blockquote>

;like, you know
<blockquote>1. ''(discourse particle)'' Space filler during sentence.

<blockquote>''I don't want too much conflict to happen, '''like, you know'''. You wouldn't want too much conflict to happen, like, you know. I mean-like, you know, between you and him any further. Yeah.''<ref>[[I Love You Kacey]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Love Quest]]
<blockquote>1.''(noun)'' Chris's on-going search for a sweetheart.

<blockquote>''As for Wes, I blame all of these happenings on him. If he had not taken my life-long friend away from me, I might have a Pretty Girlfriend today. And I would not have had to set out on endeavoring '''LOVE QUEST'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In its context, the term Love Quest, makes sense, as a "quest" is defined as "a search or pursuit made in order to find or obtain something".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/quest</ref> In Chris's case, he's trying to find a significant other in order to solve all of his problems.</blockquote>

;lovehog
<blockquote>1.'(noun)'' A lover in a relationship between two [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Also, I have finished the drawing for you, and I have shown off the Original '''LoveHog''' Couple's Wedding Rings, and their three children: Cerah Rosey, Robbie Sonee and (Shiney Rosey) Christine Rosey.''</blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehog".</blockquote>

;lucricities
<blockquote>1. ''(pl. noun?)'' lurid acts or motivations (?)

Origin: Chris completely made this word up, presumably based on "lucrid," which may in turn be based on the actual word "lurid." According to Chris, the word "lulz" can mean either "Laughs at my expense" or "Laughs under lucricities," so presumably the two contexts are equivalent.
</blockquote>

;lucrid
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' obscene, profane, wicked
<blockquote>''And promoting the hatred, and...drawing such loose—such '''lucrid''' mockeries is not gonna further the story plot or have anything new created, or even gonna help in any way...''<ref name=csm>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Possibly a corruption of "lurid," given the context. Alternatively, it might be a corruption of "ludicrous." Chris has used this word to describe the homoerotic/dickgirl art on the ED page, as well as the fan comic in which he was depicted as a man-baby.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== M ==
|-
|
;make one's own peeps n' poops

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to urinate and deficate at the same time

<blockquote>Uh, actually, uh, actually Crystal is uh, doing, is uh, doing her preschool homework, and uh, Reg-, and Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' babychild! '''Made his lil' peeps n' poops'''! And he went, and he went weewee all over the bathroom.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/PlayingHouse</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a clip of Family Guy, where Herber the Pervert is letting his dog out to "make his pees n' poops". <ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtlwEfZEmrg</ref></blockquote>

;mass debate

<blockquote>1. (adjective) to pleasure one's self; to masturbate

<blockquote> "I've actually done it ['''mass debating'''] to myself so many times, even with a hunk of - even with an inflatable plastic woman..."</blockquote>

Origin: This particular euphemism comes from Chris's tendency to refrain from using inappropriate language, as well as his unusual variation of a southern accent combined with a minor speech impediment.</blockquote>

;[[Manajerks|manajerk]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a store manager

<blockquote>''And then these two guys- and then these two '''manajerks''' approached me.''</blockquote>

Origin: A portmantau of "manager" and "jerk". </blockquote>

;mashed potato grenade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[Wikipedia:Stielhandgranate|Stielhandgranate]], a special German hand grenade with a handle.

<blockquote>"I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my '''mashed potato grenade''' could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed fro murder."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2013_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a Facebook post sent to [[Megan Schroeder]] accusing her of his ban from the [[Game Place]], where he [[Chris and reality|makes paranoid claims]] of what she, [[Mimms]], [[Lucas]], and [[Snyder]] were thinking that day. A corruption of "potato masher grenade", a common English nickname of the Stielhandgranate<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stielhandgranate</ref>.</blockquote>

;mental block

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' mental disorder; a disorder which inhibits normal functioning.

<blockquote>''And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And, after the stress from some of the people—people at PVCC, as well as my '''mental block''' [mimes punching himself in the head] of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir—approach the girls like I used to.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Chan%27s_Public_Announcement</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to his [[autism]] as a "mental block", soley due to how it keeps him from socializing with girls. In reality, a mental block is the inability to remember a specific thing. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_block</ref></blockquote>

;mislabel

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to put a label on Chris or any of his creations in a way he doesn't like, regardless of truth
2. ''(noun)'' a label of such slanderous nature; see also "misunderstanding"
<blockquote>''I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE '''Mislabeling''' than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again? ''<ref>[[Common Questions#1_February_2010]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Just about everywhere. He appears to use this term as often as the word "slanderous". Curiously, the redundancy "ill-mislabeling" (as if there were any other kind) has appeared once.<ref>[[CWC Blog#28_December_2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;misspeak

<blockquote>1.''(verb)'' to lie

<blockquote>''Sometimes, I have '''misspoke'''. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. Hand to God. And on my Bible. I'd have to go look for it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/ToJackie</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Instead of accepting that someone has called him out on [[Lies|his bullshit]], Chris prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this ploy.

</blockquote>

;misunderstanding

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a deliberate view that contradicts Chris; see also "mislabel"
<blockquote>''*AND WE WILL NOT TAKE THE '''MISUNDERSTANDINGS''', THE MISLABELS, AND ALL THE LIKE SITTING DOWN!!!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Issue_9/Page_39|2=Issue 9 Page 39}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misappropration. Note that it is not, as in reality,<ref>[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misunderstanding Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "misunderstanding"]</ref> a mistaken notion (alternatively a dispute) based on faulty information, but a malicious action worthy of [[tard rage]]. Apparently a slanderous troll has to actively "misunderstand" Chris. Also, Chris has used the related word "misunderstood" (participle adjective) as an insult, not realizing that if the troll misunderstood (transitive verb) him, ''Chris'' would be the one that was misunderstood (participle adjective).<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Rosechu_the_transwoman|Mailbag 39]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;modnar
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' random

<blockquote>''I may be '''modnar''', but I try not to be offensive, and if I do, then I am sorry. I can not please Everyone.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Random", spelt backwards.</blockquote>

;[[Monthly tugboat|monthly tugboat]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's Social Security Disability Service

<blockquote>"I'm getting by livin' with my folks and a '''monthly tugboat.'''"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Monthly_tugboat#References_by_Chris</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently coined the term "Monthly Tugboat" due to a comparison he makes between gaining money through his SSDS vs. winning the lottery. In his mind, winning the lottery is like riding a "Luxury ship that can easily sink", while gaining money from the government is the same as getting cargo from a ship pulled by a tugboat. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/BlueSpike_Skype_Logs_12</ref></blockquote>

;[[Muscle bra|muscle bra]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A sports bra used for covering a man's chest.

<blockquote>''And you know what, I highly recommend this to every dude who goes around shirtless: wear a '''muscle bra'''. Because nobody, and I mean nobody wants to see your dog-gone ugly pecs, they're so ugly and repulsive, ugh... creeps everybody out.''</blockquote>


|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== N ==
|-
|

[[File:CWCcomeuppancemedallion.JPG|thumb|Shiver me timbers!]]
;[[naïve]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb, lacking intelligence.

<blockquote>''You are such a cowardly, '''naïve''', retarded, individual.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers</ref ></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only seems to understand the most simplified definition of the word. In general terms, the word "naïve" is defined as "showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment."<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/naive</ref> However, in Chris's mind, the word is used to "question one's intelligence". Despite his distaste for the use of the word on him, this turns out to be a commonly used insult by Chris.</blockquote>

[[File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg|thumb|Chris travels to France]]
;navy
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' semen.

<blockquote>''You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''navy''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Play on words, i.e, a navy is a collection of seamen/semen.

''See also: [[CWC-isms#C|Comeuppance]]''
</blockquote>

;NEARLY SAME
<blockquote>1. ''(Adjective)'' Similar.

<blockquote>''And so I killed about killed about twenty miles round trip for gas to go find her house. But it turns out that was a troll posing as that girl. [sighs] THE VOICES SOUNDED '''NEARLY SAME'''.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;neutral
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' platonic.

<blockquote>''I apologize, but I meant the term '''neutrally''', and I never meant anything from that.''<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And One More thing, Darling!... Talluah Bankhead would be Insulted with your response to the term's '''neutral''' usage. Hmpf!'<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes words like "darling" and "dear", are gender neutral terms. Because of this, he assumes that if he claims that he used it in a "neutral" way, people will know he's not using the term in a romantic tone.

</blockquote>

;[[Niggo|niggo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An African-American person.

<blockquote>''Where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggos'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Julie_Reveals_Herself</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bastardization of the racial slur "nigger". This butchering was done after [[BlueSpike]] forced Chris to say: "''BILLY MAYS is the new mayor of CWCville, and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers''". Chris decided to repeat this phrase, but decided to "outsmart" BlueSpike by replacing "niggers" with "niggos".</blockquote>

;[[Nombie-zazis|nombie-zazis]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' zombie nazis

<blockquote>''Anyway, as for the medical study, and this will require your aid, Magi-Chan. In June of 2015, the scientists have found the gene-like molecule which makes a person turn...ugh..'''nombie-zazis'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Son10revp3.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacement for homosexuals and homosexuality in the revised [[Sonichu 10]].</blockquote>

;not-troll
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a victim of trolling.

<blockquote>''Consider who does more harassing, which do you block? <ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-278#post-2549629]]</ref>
<blockquote>
*Every Foul-Mouth Troll
*The '''Not-Troll''' they follow</blockquote>''</blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's mind, only two types of people exist on [[the Internet]], those who are trolls, and those who are victims of trolling. Because the person being trolled is supposedly '''not''' a troll, they are a "not-troll". Chris eventually deleted the aforementioned post, and reposted it, replacing "not-troll" with "victim" to clarify what he was referring to in the first place.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-279</ref></blockquote>

;[[Noviophobia|noviophobia]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the fear that someone you want to date is already dating someone else.

<blockquote>''His one fault, that has restricted him from finding the Ms. Right, he had a major case of '''Noviophobia''', where he is afraid to even approach most ladies, because he thought that they were all already paired up with “A Jerk.”''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_News_Dash</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Because Chris was so frustrated with so many [[CWC-isms#J|jerks]] stealing his potential mates, Chris decided that his envy and hatred of men was a real phobia. Thus, overconfident in his ability to speak [[Spanish]], formed the word "noviophobia" by using the Spanish word ''novio'', meaning "boyfriend", and the English suffix, -phobia, meaning fear . </blockquote>
</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== O ==
|-
|
[[File:Axels2.jpg|thumb|right]]
;OH! MY AXELS! (or OW! MY AXELS!)
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of pain in one's axles (the central shafts of rotating wheels or gears in a machine).

<blockquote>'''''OOOHHHHHH!!!! MY AXELS!!!!!'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Written for [[Ghostbusters|Ghost Buggy]]'s cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], based upon the character's tendency to complain about its aching mechanical components.</blockquote>

;old-fashioned<blockquote>
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Racist.

<blockquote>''But still, call me '''old-fashioned''' but, I'd rather be- I would not- I'd uh- I'd definitely wouldn't uh... NOT BLACK. Not black.''<ref>[[Mumble_4]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' Opposed to miscegenation.

<blockquote>''I mean '''Old Fashioned''' as in the Classic white-marry-white type of thing.''<ref>[[Mailbag 37]]</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' Homophobic.
<blockquote>''My father is '''OLD FASHIONED'''; he NEVER gives thought to homos, and he HATES them too.''<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

4. ''(adjective)'' Dating back to the 1980s.

<blockquote>''Ah, you can tell this is an '''old-fashioned''' Lego set on account of this—the old-fashioned "LegoLand" on the corner.''<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref></blockquote>

5. ''(adjective)'' Preferring real women over waifus.
<blockquote>''Nothing against waifus and the people who have them, but I Never Really understood the appeal and concept of making out a character from a show who is Dimensions Away from your own league to be any sort of a significant other to you. I’m more '''old-fashioned''' towards real women.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/954587249622077440</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;ounce of vagina

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Essentially Chris's way of saying "I'll at least lose my virginity at some point".

<blockquote>''And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one '''ounce of vagina''', I have your number, and you're going down!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Attention_All_Sonichu_Fans_(NOT_HATERS)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref> Which, after an encounter with a girl named [[Mia Hamm]], may be true...[[Virgin with rage|or not]].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 6th, 2008]]</ref>
</blockquote>
;outercourse
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the act of fingering

2. ''(noun)'' a handjob

<blockquote>''I understand. You may or may not have had much exposure to sexual images as I've had, so the idea of a "hand job" (which was the act drawn there) as part of '''outtercourse''''' [sic]'' (versus intercourse) was a surprise to you.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_2008#Chris_thinks_she_was_scarred_because_she_doesn.27t_know_much_about_sex</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "outercourse" is essentially another way to refer to dry humping.<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/outercourse</ref> In Chris's mind however, outercourse simply refers to sex which involves touching each other genitals, because they happen outside of the body.

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== P ==
|-
|
[[File:MPSGotReal.jpg|right|thumb|Shit just got real!]]
;parkay
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an epic style of running

<blockquote>''Hello there, fans! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the Sonichu franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do a '''parkay''' from this point all the way down to the gara--parking garage where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Edge</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], Chris calls his style of running "parkay". Chris confused his running as a form of parkour, an acrobatic sport typically used in the military as a means of practicing the navigation of a complex environment without the use of equipment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkour</ref>. Given Chris's [[Speech Impediment]], the word "parkour" somehow came out as "parkay".
</blockquote>

;[[Parody|parody]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any work that "borrows" characters, plots, or styles from other pieces of fiction, whether infringing International [[Copyright]] Law or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the Sonichu Comics, except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise '''parodic'''.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:Issue_8_Cover.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of what constitutes as a parody most likely stems from his interest in shows like [[Family Guy]] and [[Wikipedia:Robot Chicken|Robot Chicken]], both of which use copyrighted characters and make jokes around them. In his mind, because those shows can get away with using such characters, that gives him an excuse to do the same thing in his comics. Ironically, Whenever Chris spots and actual "parody", he thinks that the characters from the original work are being defaced.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Parody#Chris_does_not_understand_the_concept_of_parody</ref></blockquote>

;peanut
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who disregards you, or otherwise does not accept you for who you are.

<blockquote>''So you enjoy it, just do it—don't worry about other people's opi—pinions. Because, uh, compared to the other schools, those people who disregard you are just total '''peanuts'''. And I'm not talkin' Charlie Brown; I'm talkin' 'bout the little nuts after the shells. The real peanut gallery. That would be peanuts, wouldn't it?''<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Apparently derived from "[[Wikipedia:peanut gallery|peanut gallery]]," a term used to describe the hecklers in an vaudeville audience who would throw peanuts at a performer. Chris's own spin on this concept is to dismiss such hecklers as being insignificant like literal peanuts.
</blockquote>

;[[Pedofork|pedofork]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pedophile.

<blockquote>''I am not a '''pedofork''', you DORKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "pedophile" and "dork". Coined in Chris's [[Madman Rising]] video, in response to the trolls who were comparing him to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herbert_(Family_Guy_character)| Herbert the Pervert] from Family Guy.</blockquote>

;[[Pickle|pickle]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A penis, particularly one of [[JERKS|any man that isn't Chris]].

<blockquote>''Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu, Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' '''PICKLE'''!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Chrisreply3.PNG</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "pickle" is one of the few hundred slang words for the word "penis".<ref>https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/PenisTesticlesSlang.pdf</ref> It is unknown why Chris prefers to refer to the penises of other men as "pickles", while he calls his own his "duck", but it may have to do with Chris's sexual insecurity and the fact that he legitimately hates actual pickles <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_4#Why_Chris_hates_pickles</ref>, whereas Chris thinks he's special enough to have a cutesy name for his own penis.</blockquote>

;[[Pmurt]]

<blockquote>1. ''(proper noun)'' President Donald Trump

<blockquote>''EID '''PMURT''' EID!!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Eid,_Pmurt,_Eid</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Donald Trump's last name, but spelled backwards. In Chris's first usage of this CWC-ism, Chris mentioned how "Trump spelled backward is "Pmurt", which sounds like "hurt"".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2016_Facebook_posts#Registered_to_vote</ref> This is because of Chris's strong hatred for Trump, despite showing very little knowledge about [[Chris and politics|America's political system]]. Chris also reversed the name because to him, reversing someone's name will degrade and weaken them. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L</ref>In his eyes, if he repeats this word again and again, people will start turning against Trump and start voting for [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary]], which, unsurprisingly enough, never happened <ref>https://www.nytimes.com/elections/results/president</ref>.</blockquote>

;poetry
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Something which causes awe.

<blockquote>''Soon, the chill will come, and the skies setting into darkness; it's like '''Poetry''' in the truest motion."<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-8-21-crescent-eclipse.33504/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown
</blockquote>

;poke
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''Anyway, eclectic! High on the hedge and high on the hog. You want some of this '''poke''', mon?<ref>[[CWC address to Royal Board]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended as a demonstration of what "Soni-Chew the Eclectic Heeedge Hog Poke Mon of London, England" would sound like. A coded reference to Pokémon.
</blockquote>

;[[Prickly-Wicklies|prickly-wicklies]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Punishment for insulting or harming Chris; essentially Chris's word for karma.

<blockquote>''War gets you '''prickly-wicklies'''... as well as punches.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Warm_Fuzzy_Tale</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the Children's book, [[A Warm Fuzzy Tale]].

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#F|fuzzy-wuzzies]]

</blockquote>

;[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]

<blockquote>1. ''(backronym)'' The headquarters of several Sonichu villains.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: The name itself is a backronym of the college Chris attended, [[PVCC|the Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. After experiencing several mishaps throughout his college experience<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_English</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_college</ref>, the dean giving him the cold hard truth about why his [[Love Quest]] is doomed to fail became the straw that broke the camel's back, and Chris thought it would be a smart idea to deface the college afterward in his comics.</blockquote>

;prowldent
<blockquote>1. ''(???)'' Unknown.

<blockquote>There's no quote to cite this from, just a logo in which Chris gives the name "Prowldent Virginia Community College" to [[PVCC]].<ref>[[:File:ProwldentVCC.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely combining connotations of "prowl" and "dent" (either to leave an indentation or [[fangs|teeth]]).
</blockquote>

;Pu Tuhs!
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Shut Up!

<blockquote>''SHE; my Ariel Starter was Female from the start, so '''Pu Tuhs!'''''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Q ==
|-
|

;q-sand
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Short for quarter sandwich (i.e. a quarter of a sandwich).

<blockquote>
''So, mom ignored her and ate the '''q-sand''' in front of her.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 31]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Appeared in an [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail]] sent to [[Jackie]] dated August 5, 2011. Most likely unnecessarily used as a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]] abbreviation.
</blockquote>

;quarters
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An office space; headquarters.

<blockquote>''Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her '''quarters''' and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_Wikipedia_profile</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The way Chris uses the word "quarters" in this case makes it sound like Chris is being forced to go join the military, as in this context, the word "quarters" refers to the housing of a military personnel and their family.<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/quarters</ref> Considering that Chris already viewed [[Mary Lee Walsh|Mary]] as a [[Mary Lee Walsh#Mary Lee Walsh in Sonichu|supervillain]] scheming to [[Virginia is for Virgins|end all love in Virginia]], he most likely meant to refer to Mary's office as her "headquarters", but thinks that one's headquarters are the same thing as one's "quarters".

2. ''(noun, pl.)'' coins, no matter their origin or worth.

<blockquote>''Uhh. I want a soda, but it takes only C '''quarters''' and I only have W quarters. Do you have any change?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The first time this word was used in such a strange way was in [[Sonichu 9]], where it is revealed that [[CWCville|CWCville's]] currency is made up of "C-quarters" and "W-quarters". According to this issue, 10 C-quarters, make up a single W-quarter, which ultimately defeats the whole concept of the "quarter" coin. Strangely enough, despite being a part of the United States, CWC-ville still issues this strange form of currency, along with US dollars. Possibly to make this strange connection make somewhat more sense, Chris decided to refer to his currency as "quarters".

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== R ==
|-
|

[[File:ReldnahcTheRapier .jpg|thumb|Reldnahc the Rapier]]
;[[Raincoat|raincoat]]
<blockquote>1. (''noun'') a condom

<blockquote>''You ARE the woman...we gotta stop by Wall-Mall-Wart on the way for a "'''raincoat'''".''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "raincoat" is actually an archaic slang for the word "condom".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/raincoat</ref> Given that Chris has been raised by two geezers his whole life, and that part of his childhood has consisted of [[Gilligan's Island|old TV shows]], Chris thought that people would understand what he meant when he states that his Mary Sues are having protected sex with a raincoat.</blockquote>

;[[Random-access humor|random-access humor]]
<blockquote>1. (''noun'') non-sequital humor.

<blockquote>''Punchy grew up in a dojo, where he perfected his punches. He is also full of '''random-access humor'''. He lost his tail in a brutal fight.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP5.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his brain is completely random, and it always spews out incoherent garbage. In his mind, this works in the same way a computer processes random-access memory. <ref>Fhttps://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#Crossing_the_Na.C3.AFve_Line_.281:46:21-1:52:41.29)</ref>

</blockquote>

;rapier
<blockquote>
1. (''noun, attributive'') rapist, sexual assailant.

<blockquote>
''Now! My '''rapier''' friend, I would very much like you to get off me, please.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly a pun. Chris-Chan Sonichu calls [[Reldnahc_Notsew_Naitsirhc#Fictional_biography|Reldnahc Ha-Taque]] [[Chris-chan Sonichu#Transexual|his/her]] "rapier friend" in [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]] after Reldnahc tackles him/her to the ground in a suggestive pose and touches his/her chest, thus (in Chris's hyperbolic mind) "raping" him/her. He could also be using the externally attested definition, as an adjective meaning "witty"<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rapier#Adjective</ref>, metaphorically referring to a kind of thin, sharp-pointed sword.
</blockquote>

;[[Reality Cartoon|reality cartoon]]

<blockquote>
1. (''noun'') The universe.

<blockquote>
''Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a '''reality cartoon'''.''<ref>August 2017 tweets#"Life is a cartoon"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris's life revolves mainly around [[Vidya]] and cartoons, it would make sense to him that the most believable explanation for the universe and everything in it is that it's all a cartoon. Likely related to Chris's known belief that [[Chris_and_reality#Fictional_characters_and_media|all fiction actually exists in alternate universes]].
</blockquote>

;realistic

<blockquote>
1. (''adjective'') realated to live-action.
<blockquote>
''Ah! Going for something '''realistic'''. Awesome.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, taking everything he sees at face value, possibly believes live-action shows actually happen.</blockquote>

;[[Recycling|recycling]]

<blockquote>1. (''verb'') the act of one ingesting their own semen to preserve their sperm count.

<blockquote> I '''recycle''' my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009</ref> </blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having very little knowledge of how the male reproductive system works, thinks that men can run out of sperm from masturbating or orgasming too much. Fearing the loss of "potential children", Chris actually thinks that by ingesting the sperm back into his body, his sperm count will stay in balance, thus, he is "recycling" it.

</blockquote>

;[[Reeb|reeb]]

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') beer or any other alcoholic beverage of the like.

<blockquote>''Then he glugs his '''reeb''', heh-heh, and then he conks out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, thinking he's so clever, decided to censor any mention of the word "beer" in his comics, by spelling the word backward.</blockquote>

;Resident-Evil refrigerator

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') The refrigerator in the previous Chandler Household.

<blockquote>''Kitchen very much blocked off all over... with the '''Resident Evil refrigerator''' right there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to the fridge as the "Resident Evil" kind, because in Japan, the game ''Resident Evil'' is known as ''Biohazard''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref><ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resident_Evil</ref> Considering the quality of the household, that name may very well fit the description of the fridge in the state it was in before filming the [[Tour of Chris's House II|Second House Tour]].</blockquote>

;[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]]

<blockquote>1. (''noun'') The female counterpart of the [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon]].</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Rosechu of CWCville, [[Rosechu]]. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the last name of the ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' character, Amy Rose, and "Raichu", the Evolved form of a Pikachu.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== S ==
|-
|
[[File:Wild Snergen Flergen.jpg|thumb]]

;salty
<blockquote>1 ''(adjective)'' to show more maturity or coarseness than is expected, especially knowledge of [[honest]] topics like [[Chris and sex|sex]].

<blockquote>''Ah, but I am not the weak person they think I am; I am much, much '''saltier'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon a line from "Bowling Girls", ninth episode of ''[[Excel Saga]]'': "But I'm not the sweet little girl I was a few minutes ago! I'm much, much saltier now!" "Salty" in this context derives from naval lingo, since the most experienced sailors would have greater exposure to both the saltwater seas and worldly experiences.
</blockquote>

;[[Scale of Respect|scale of respect]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his respect for other people.

<blockquote>I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my '''Scale of Respect''' each by 2 points<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Scale_of_Respect</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, like most other autistics, tends to view the world based on numerical values due to their lack of understanding of certain abstract concepts such as respect. Because of this, Chris made his very own numerical scale to decide on who should be respected, compared to who shouldn't.</blockquote>

;self-epic
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' describing a situation which is epic, and at the same time related to Chris and his various clones.

<blockquote>''And I will square-off in the TRULY '''SELF-EPIC''' Battle between me, and my Dark Half.''<ref>[[An Important Update]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;shitful
<blockquote>1. '(adjective)'' hurtful; defamitory.

<blockquote>''And this is the last time I will ever say anything in response to your '''shitful''' and hurtful comments and hatred for Hate's Sake!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2014_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Shitful is a vulgar slang word, synonymous with words like "boat-load" or "truck-load". Chris may have seen the "shit" part of this word, and assumed that the word is meant to be used for specific situations that seem "shitty" to him.</blockquote>

;[[SLGBTQ]]

<blockquote>1. ''(acronym)'' an extended acronym for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender).

<blockquote>''Considering your logo there, Texas will be feeling more love from the '''SLGBTQ''' community; give us props and Love, Lone Star State.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2017_tweets#Hurricane_Harvey_and_SLGBT</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first used this acronym, he didn't explain what groups the "S" or "Q" were supposed to represent, making plenty of people confused. Eventually, Chris revealed that the "S" represents '''s'''traight and cis-gender people, while "Q" represents "'''q'''ueers" or "'''q'''uestioning people". Chris believes that if he included straight people into LGBT, then those particular people would feel more invited to join into the community. Considering the fact that gay people are minorities, adding the "S" to LGBT only defeats the entire purpose of identifying people as LGBT in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a mentally handicapped person

<blockquote>''And finally, after a hard "odd" day, he rides home on a bus, but unfortunately, it had a few "'''slow-in-the-minds'''" on it.''</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;slow-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' mentally retarded

2. ''(adjective)'' gullible

3. ''(adjective)'' loss of train of thought

</blockquote>

;SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase one may shout out when asked for attendance.

<blockquote>'''''SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P6.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An obvious example of Chris's [[CWC-isms#R|random-access humor]]. This strange phrase appeared in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], when the cast was asked for their attendance during a [[CWC-isms#D|Dating Education]] class. When [[Wild Sonichu]] was asked for his attendance, he blurted out this phrase as Chris's many attempts to be funny in his comics. Given Chris's childish sense of humor, it would make a whole lot of sense for him to include a character randomly blurt out a nonsensical phrase out of nowhere.</blockquote>

;snooze cruise
<blockquote>1. a long period of slumber

<blockquote> ''Next, he had Trigonometry...I'd hate to be Christian when his nerves kicked into action after waking up from a "notey" '''snooze cruise''', but I was.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the school report [[A Week With Christian Chandler]]. Given the time this report was written, Chris picked up this phrase up from ''Sonic Adventure''.

</blockquote>

;somecummpentydifferent
<blockquote>1. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce a change in subject.

<blockquote>''Anyway and now for somecummpentydifferent stay tuned for '''somecummpentydifferent''' — a bunch of good pushups!''<ref>[[Getting Foam Ed]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce use of [[random-access humor]].

<blockquote>''And now for '''somecummpentydifferent'''. BUUUUNG! And now it's Monty Python's flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, Greeg, why is people running away.''<ref>[[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Note this is the very first thing he says, so there's nothing to be completely different ''from''.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is trying to say "And now for something completely different" like John Cleese does on [[Monty Python]]. Suffice to say Cleese's ability to say three multisyllabic words in rapid succession exceeds that of Chris.</blockquote>

;[[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]
<blockquote>1. (noun) The male counterpart of the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Sonichu of CWCville, Sonichu. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the name of the titualar character of ''Sonic the Hedgehog'', Sonic, and "Pikachu".</blockquote>

;soo
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Very, Very much.

<blockquote>''Dear Blanca, I am '''soo''' happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be''<ref>[[Chris's Letter to Blanca]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In writing, Chris often adds extra o's to the word "so" to prolong the "o" sound and show added emphasis. However, where most people would add two or more o's, (e.g., "I love you sooo much!"), Chris frequently only adds one, resulting in "soo," which makes the word look like it's supposed to be pronounced "sue". This has the (unintentional?) effect of mimicking the speech patterns of a Valley Girl or an effeminate homosexual.

This may originate from pamphlets published by [http://www.channing-bete.com/ Channing Bete], [[Autism|short and uninformative]] self-help pamphlets often handed out at churches, the last page of which often feature a summary headlined by "Soo…" Given his distrust of help from anyone other than [[Rocky]], it is not entirely impossible that Chris has read Channing Bete pamphlets occasionally.

This is one of many recurring jokes in the [[Sonichu Audiobooks]] in which the narrator pronounces words like "soo" as they are literally spelled, instead of how Chris intended them to be read.
</blockquote>

;soup beds
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Homeless shelter with beds

<blockquote>'' I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have '''soup beds'''. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS!''<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris tries to distill his "soup hotel" idea into its two components, but he mangles one of them by retaining the "soup" prefix.
</blockquote>

;sourdough region
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The crotch area

<blockquote>Its weak point is still the '''sourdough region''', but it would take FIVE KICKS to get to it<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_4_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown</blockquote>

;spike on one's shoulder
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' refers to the act of holding grievances towards someone.

<blockquote>That was, that was, that was misunderstanding, that was just, there was a whole bunch of misunderstandings between me and my employer, and he, and he has, and he had, and he had, and he had a '''spike on his shoulder''' against me.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A confusion with the phrase "chip on one's shoulder".</blockquote>

;sticky dream
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A wet dream

<blockquote>''After falling back asleep Chris had a "'''sticky dream'''."''<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris claims that a "wet dream" actually refers to wetting one's bed as opposed to nocturnal emission.
</blockquote>



;[[Sub-Episodes|sub-episode]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The side stories in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: A result of Chris' strange [[Chris and English#Television jargon|television jargon]] in his comics.</blockquote>

;sumbah
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Minced oath for "son of a bitch."

<blockquote>''Yo, Christian, thanks for saving my sister from that crazy '''sumbah'''''<ref>[[Sonichu Special 4]], page K-4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Probably based upon "sumbitch."
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetbolt|sweetbolt]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used by [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Ahh..that salad was great! What's wrong '''sweetbolt'''?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A sweetheart.

<blockquote>''I understand, and I will NEVER put it against you. Yes, as your '''SweetBolt'''. :)?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>





|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== T ==
|-
|
[[File:Duck Pounding Some Tom-Tom.jpeg|thumb|A duck pounding some tom-tom real hard]]

;teenages

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The 13-19 age group; teenage years.

<blockquote>''Ahem... hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all '''teenages''', as well as the, uh, gals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's [[Future Message]], he attempts to talk down to just about every age group. In order to do this, he starts his video off with the quote above. Chris clearly couldn't think of a way to refer to teenagers, so he decided to refer to such people by "teenages". A butchering of "people of all ages".</blockquote>

;telekinesis

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Telepathy, i.e. communication through long distances, usually via psychic or supernatural means.

<blockquote>''I’ve been communicating with her through '''telekinesis''', and she sounded very lonesome.''<ref>[[Silvana]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas tele'''kine'''sis means ''moving'' objects from a distance with psychic powers (c.f. ''[[wikipedia:kinetic energy|kinetic]]''), Chris has never used the term properly. [[Magi-Chan|Psychic]] [[Silvana|characters]] in the [[comic]] have both powers of telekinesis and telepathy, but Chris has only used the former to refer to both.
</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|tobacky]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' tobacco or tobacco products

<blockquote>''If I could, I would take every last ounce of '''tobacky''', put 'em on a rocket, and shoot 'em up to the Moon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris hated the act of smoking cigarettes so much that even uttering the word "tobacco" made him feel uncomfortable, so he created a new retarded sounding word to avoid saying the actual word.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref></blockquote>

;tom-tom

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia.

<blockquote>''MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR '''TOM-TOM''' TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from the short Adult Swim music video, ''Pound my Tom-Tom'', which served as the intro to the cartoon, ''Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil''<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DVoH0Njow</ref>. Considering Chris barely understands anything adult, the fact that this was meant to be a bad euphemism, which the character, Lucy, used to avoid directly mentioning her vagina, flew over his head.</blockquote>

;[[Tomgirl|tomgirl]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male who is into girly stuff; apparently, in Chris's mind, this goes all the way to [[Tomgirl Pictures|make-up and crossdressing]].

<blockquote>''I am '''Tomgirl'''.''<ref>[[:File:I_am_tomgirl.jpg|PSN comment as of 6 April 2011]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: analogous to "tomboy", i.e. a girl who likes boy-stuff.

</blockquote>

;too many crooks

<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of dissatisfaction with an overabundance of evildoers.

<blockquote>''Well, call it--this was "too many crooks." '''Too many crooks!''' Too many crooks! And that ED page is one of those crooks.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon the idiom, "too many cooks spoil the broth," although that idiom means something, whereas this is just an incomplete sentence.
</blockquote>

;triage

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' ménage à trois; a romantic relationship between three people.

<blockquote>''Magi-Chan Sonichu, Silvana Rosechu & Mewtwo / A Loving '''Triage'''''<ref>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A corruption or misspelling of "triad", possibly influenced by the ending of "ménage". "[[wikipedia:Triage|Triage]]" is a real word with a completely different meaning and unrelated etymology.
</blockquote>

;trollin' stupid

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Very stupid, in a manner pertaining to trolling.

<blockquote>''Because that's what you deserve, you God damn womanizing raping... '''trollin' stupid''' pickle suited... nigger!''<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to have coined this phrase for his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend"]] lyrics with "trollin'" serving as an intensifier along the lines of "fucking."
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== U ==
|-
|
[[File:Uncouth Twat.png|thumb|Most uncouth!]]
;ugly growth

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to refer to his own penis negatively.

<blockquote>''"Did I not just tell you I am Seven Inches Long?! It is soo long, that I am literally able to stretch it Under my taint, and tuck it between my own ass cheeks, beyond my ass hole. With help, I can literally even shove the head of the '''Ugly Growth''' Up Mine!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_2</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Un-clit|un-clit]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A piercing Chris got on his perrinium as an immitation clitoris.

<blockquote>''It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my '''un-clit'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Un-clit</ref></blockquote>

Origin: During his Tomgirl years, Chris was, and still is, very desperate to gain female body traits such as bigger breasts, wider hips, a fully functioning vagina, etc. In order to get a part of the work done, Chris got a piercing on his taint as a sort of pseudo-clitoris, showing more of Chris's limited knowledge of female anatomy. </blockquote>

;uncouth
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' unlikeable, lacking good manners.

<blockquote>''And, by the way, among which, You give the Males a Most Terrible and Horrible Name in your behavior. Most '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_1</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Trump is most Immature, '''Uncouth''', and Not Valid to be president.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Misc_E-mails#Anti-Pmurt</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I felt it appropriate to change my profile photo back to the filtered one for what happened in France the while back with due respect of the continuing of Trump's most drastic and '''uncouth''' actions in office.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/January_2017_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''You, sir, are '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#Trump.2C_you_mocked_the_mentally-challenged</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''All of you are nothing but immature, borish, '''uncouth''', and damned Neanderthals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonic_Boom_Protests#Chris_Rages_On</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Not Sexual Fantasy; Friendships, You '''Uncouth''' Cad. Hmpf!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Unleashing_his_inner_Brit</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And as it Had been My fault on that #NationalGirlfriendTweet that started the whole mess, that was Why I chose whole-heartedly to Harass Me instead of Doopie or Anyone Else who was being harassed with the mis-content from Years Ago from me taken Out Of Context, Mind you, because Harassing Anyone at Anyone else’s Expense is Just Plain Wrong, Bullying, and '''Uncouth'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_tweets</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''And it was ignored by you that Talulah Bankhead coined the term for Tabitha, you '''Uncouth''' Twat.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Tabitha_addresses_CWC_flame_war</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I agree it is shameful of these people to have accounts just to haze at me and all others, Soo '''uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NightStar2891_tweets#Twitter_spam_for_Tabitha</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I miss Jessica. You Trolls Scared Her Off by either Hacking or Reporting her Facebook. You '''Uncouth''' Cads!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jessica_Quinn</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As demonstrated, Chris uses this word way more than any 21st century [[American]] would. Chris picked up this word from an MLP episode, where Applebloom and Applejack are talking about what the word "uncouth" means<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-SrQ-Oz1k4</ref>, seeing how this conversation alone is somehow a staple in the Brony subculture. Seeing how Chris is one of those many Bronies who sees more [[Night_Star#Chris_spills_the_beans|meaning]] in the show than it actually possesses, Chris picked up this term due to how foreign and smart it sounded to him.
</blockquote>

;unto
<blockquote>1. ''(preposition)'' Archaic or poetic form of the word "to".

<blockquote>''Now that it has been made fully clear to me, I am now able to devote myself fully '''unto''' you, Julie.''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''I am very devastated, due to my SHATTERED HEART that [[Mary Lee Walsh|XXXXX]] caused '''unto''' me!.''</blockquote>

Origin: Another one of Chris's autistic ways of sounding smart, possibly in imitation of the Bible. (c.f. ''[[Chris and hypocrisy|Do unto others...]]'') Chris uses this form more frequently than most English speakers of the 21st Century should, even when it sounds unwieldy.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== V ==
|-
|
;vaginatables

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia

<blockquote>''There is no quote to cite the use of this CWC-ism''</blockquote>

Origin: A strange hybrid of the words "vagina" and "vegetables". Used in Chris's e-mail adress "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/China#Vaginatables</ref></blockquote>

;vege-marmite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Vegemite

<blockquote>''Certainly not a '''vege-marmite''' sanwich. Lol''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-372</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A retarded pun made by Chris to state his distaste for veggie marmite. Coincidentally, vegemite is essentially marmite, yeast extract from brewing beer turned into a pungent, salty paste, with vegetables and spices added in.<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegemite</ref></blockquote>

;vestite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A transvestite person.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and '''Vestites'''; ID as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the above post, Chris intended to write the words "transgender" and "transvestite" in the same sentence without duplicating the trans suffix. He did so by adding a space between the prefix and the respective endings.</blockquote>

;[[Virgin with Rage|Virgin with rage]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An individual who is sexually frustrated

<blockquote>''Tell me why
I'm stuck as a '''virgin with rage'''!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/So_Need_a_Cute_Girl</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Even after allegedly having sex with [[Mia Hamm]], the idea of being a virgin and not having a sweetheart pushes Chris's buttons. This gets so bad, that he might even rage after he's lost a potential sweetheart.</blockquote>

;[[Virginia is for Virgins|Virginia is for virgins]]

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase that pushes the strange idea that the citizens of Virginia won't allow Chris to get any china solely due to his autism.

<blockquote>"'''VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS''', NOT LOVERS!"</blockquote>

Origin: A butchering of the phrase "Virginia is for Lovers". Apparently, this strange idea has started since attending PVCC, with him leaving attraction signs everywhere, only to have all of them destroyed by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] afterward.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Virginia_is_for_Virgins#Origins</ref>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== W ==
|-
|

;Walter Grisby
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A man's name often employed in acts of random-access humor.

<blockquote>''"Is this '''Walter Grisby'''? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what? DAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"''<ref>[[Random-access humor]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The retconned name of the character formerly known as [[Wes Iseli]].

Origin: Unknown; thought by some to be a reference to the Cartoon Network show ''Ed, Edd n Eddy''. A character in the PC game ''The Sims 3'' goes by the name of Walter Grisby, but the game's release post-dates Chris's first uses of the term by some years.
</blockquote>

; Warroir of Love
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an advocate for spreading love and peace.

<blockquote>''"People! You do not understand! By Not blocking the Trolls, you are Promoting Hatred; They don't always side with Love. I Am '''Warroir of Love'''."''<ref>[[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/902236285389111297]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misspelling of the word "warrior". Chris considers himself a "warrior of love" because he believes that he is the [[Chris and kindness|voice of kindness]]. Most likely derived from the derogatory term "Social Justice Warrior", a term used for individuals who advocate for social justice and equality.
</blockquote>

;well-breasted
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Having large breasts.

<blockquote>''And her image dawned upon me in my imagination, starting out as the '''well-breasted''' pink electric-hedgehog (Pok'emon) with the long Raichu-like tail, I drew her outfit onto her in red and Battery-Charged Blue.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Rosechu|CWCipedia article on Rosechu}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusion between "well-endowed" and "large-breasted".
</blockquote>

;[[Women's rights]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The right for women to strip down without interference.

2. ''(noun)'' The right for women to not be depicted with a [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]].

Origin: Chris's understanding of sexism is botched up beyond belief. Chris believes that sexism only consists of any type of aggression or abuse towards women, and that it doesn't involve any kind of unfair depiction of women, like that all women like to strip down to their bare bodies and that all they care about is sex, shopping, and cooking.

</blockquote>

;wooden nickel
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Acoustic guitar.

<blockquote>''I got the idea of the challenge from him COPYING me playing Boston's "More Than A Feeling" on Guitar Hero on his old '''Wooden Nickel'''; if he wants to copy on Guitar, he may as well be challenged in a Sing-Off.''<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In real life, a wooden nickel is a now defunct form of currency used during the Great Depression. His use probably refers to the phrase "don't take any wooden nickels" - that is, he is calling the acoustic guitar a semi-worthless imitation of his Guitar Hero controller.
</blockquote>

;worse
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Severely; extremely, in an adverse manner

<blockquote>''IMHO, having Seinor Citizens for Parents throughout your whole life is no picnic; they are '''WORSE''' Overprotective.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
|-
|
;wrath
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Great [[Chris and anger|anger]] or rage. Considered one of the [[Chris and religion|Seven Deadly Sins]].

<blockquote>''Apparently, my, uh, heed of warning towards Vivian has gone unheard or otherwise SHE DID NOT REALIZE THE FURY OF MY '''WRATH'''''<ref>[[Sign Destruction Video]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Strength sufficient to lift an office chair.

<blockquote>''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY '''WRATH'''!!''<ref>[[Power]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==X==
|-
|
;X2-checking
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Double Checking
<blockquote>''Just '''X2-checking''' if you got the drawing I left you.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-35#post-2511049]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Comes from x2 meaning times two, which means double to Chris.

</blockquote>
;XXXXX
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' censorship of the word "bitch"
<blockquote>''Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM VERY ANGRY AT THAT '''XXXXX'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Diary</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Chris's only instance of this peculiar censorship is in his [[diary]]. In it, Chris repeatedly refers to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as an "XXXXX", clearly as a censorship of the word "bitch". Why Chris chose to replace all of the letters in the word with the capital letter "X", instead of using asterisks remains a mystery.</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Y ==
|-
|
;y'all
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(pronoun)'' indicating second person plural.

<blockquote>''"'''Y'all''' are free to stay here in one or so of their bedrooms for free, and y'all get fed too. Consider this a second chance for a good life which Christian offers to y'all; seek good employment after y'all get your strength rebuilt. ... I'll go check y'all in, then I have to finish saving the world."''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_68|Issue 10 Page 68}} [[Ultra Sonichu]] to the [[Basement Rosechus]], on a '''single page'''</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''It would be appreciated if '''y'all''' can book the flight for me, because I'm unsure about my family's current financial status, and my social's being saved for my own bills.''"<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga]] </ref></blockquote>
Origin: Derived from "you all", originating from the dialect of the Southern United States (and found in [[niggos|black communities]] outside the South). Often considered substandard English, Chris even uses this in formal written situations. Also overused in the [[comic]] to the point of absurdity.
</blockquote>
|-
|
;y'all should know me by now
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction to complete strangers.

<blockquote>'''''Y'all should know me by now''', but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, back on March 17th, 2000.''<ref name=csm/></blockquote>
Origin: His second message on YouTube, addressed to the ED trolls. He would use it several more times after this, possibly making this into his tagline. The introduction is made under the assumption that Chris is [[Chris and his Ego|already well-known]].
</blockquote>

;young at heart

<blockquote>1. ''(noun, attributive)'' An individual with childlike characteristics; a childish person.

<blockquote>''I am '''Young at Heart'''; a concept I have kept within myself since childhood.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''We, the '''Young at heart''' stand alongside our Liked and Cared others.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris can't seem to tell the difference between being a child at heart, and being childish. In his mind, people who are considered childish actually lead a more exciting life, since he believes that more childlike people are willing to show off their [[kindness]] and are generally more eccentric. In reality, adults who are "young at heart" generally have a somewhat innocent outlook of life and are generally interested in things considered suitable for children, yet understand their responsibilities as adults.
</blockquote>
|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Z ==
|-
|
[[Image:ZapToTheExtreme.png|thumb|200px]]
;zap to the extreme

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Go out and be brave.

<blockquote>''Go! Sonichu! Go out and '''zap to the extreme'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 0]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''Now everyone stay green and go out and '''zap to the extr-r-r-r-r-eme'''. Have a lovely day.'' <ref>[[A New, Fun Trick!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase is first used on the cover of [[Sonichu 0]], where Chris's mary sue character tells Sonichu to "zap to the extreme" as if Chris and Sonichu were in a bona fide [[Pokémon]] tournament. Chris would then end up using this phrase time and again, usually completely out of context of its original meaning.
</blockquote>

;zapbud

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A fictitious flower found in the Sonichu canon; Rosechu's favorite flower.

<blockquote>''Oh, Rosechu, you are as beautiful as a rose, though a '''Zapbud''' is the flower that heals your woes.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Ode_to_Rosechu</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Essentially the result of Chris attempting to create a mythology around his Sonichu comics, Chris created some of his own flora as well. Because of how "zapping" seemed to be a very common theme in the earlier issues of Sonichu, Chris thought about naming his flora after this one theme.

2. ''(noun)'' a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Yes, my blossoming '''zapbud'''. That's why we are here.''<ref>[[Sonichu 0]]</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

==References==

<references/>

{{CWC-isms}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg

2018-07-08T15:36:32Z

MindHit:

Chris and journalism

2018-07-05T14:11:26Z

MindHit: /* CWCipedia */

{{Incomplete}}

{{File:IdeaGuyCwc News Media.PNG|To Chris, a troll was a reliable news source|right}}
{{quote|There must be more written about Chris-chan than George Washington.|Harry Partridge}}

Throughout most of his life, Chris has been a subject of '''journalism''', reporting, and paparazzi, whether he's aware of it or not. Every aspect of his life is documented on [[the Internet]], on sites like the [[Kiwi Farms]], [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], and [[CWCki|this one]]. The reason for this is largely due to his own willingness to openly admit and display his most embarrassing moments at the most inopportune times, although Chris himself is reluctant to admit this fact. As a result, Chris has received much attention from amateur journalists and forums, online or otherwise.

== Documentation on the Internet==

Believe it or not, the curiosity of Chris' life was pretty much what got the ball rolling for where Chris is today in terms of his fame on the internet. It all started when a [[Jason Kendrick Howell|curious troll]] just learned about Chris and his oddball lifestyle on [[4chan]], and therefore wanted to document it on Encyclopedia Dramatica to make fun of it. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref> This could have been the end of it if Chris simply handled this maturely, and just simply ignored the page as a whole. However, of course, he takes a completely unexpected route, and not only gives the trolls a good laugh but even reveals a lot of new information about himself.

=== Something Awful ===

The place where the internet first properly discovered Chris. Several forums were made about him merely days after his introduction. Chris seems to have not noticed this, however.

=== 4chan ===

Chris began getting attention on 4chan only days after, and knowledge of Chris was gained even moreso here. This site ultimately led to the creation of his article on Encyclopedia Dramatica.

=== Encyclopedia Dramatica ===

The start of Chris' infamy and years of being trolled. Several times, Chris has attacked and vandalized this site, which gave us the infamous [[ShecameforCWC]] and several more deep details about him.

=== CWCki ===

Chris doesn't hide his disdain for the CWCki, having [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|created]] [[User:JenkinsJinkies|several]] [[User:Christianchandler|accounts]] and complained about it rather frequently, however he largely pays no attention to it nowadays.

=== Wikipedia ===

Chris treated Wikipedia like Myspace and Facebook, turning his user page into an autobiography of his life (a violation of Wikipedia's rules). Other than getting his account terminated for this reason, he has also unknowingly journalized his entire life up to his discovery of Encyclopedia Dramatica, even if parts of it were [[lies|blatant lies]]. This means Chris gave the general public clues for them to be able to piece together how Chris became screwed up enough to have his own Encyclopedia page, as well as the basics as to how Chris thinks life should roll to fit his standards, giving Encyclopedia Dramatica and the Cwcki a lot to work with.

=== CWCipedia ===

Since Chris was busy screwing with other wikis and started ranting about how he got banned from every single one because of it, [[User: Cogsdev|Cogsdev]], being a good sport, decided to make a special wiki just for him, where Chris can document as much of his personal life as he so desires. Chris primarily used this wiki to work on the autobiography he desired to share on the internet, make rants about things that bothered him, talk about things he loves, talk about fan-made works, and make updates on some of his own projects, such as his [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics and his [[Little Big Planet]] levels. Interestingly enough, despite not being Cogsdev intention, people got to learn more about Chris, as he has expressed more about his life and opinions than anyone would have originally bargained for. This has continued for a couple of months until the entire wiki has been disabled due to the massive amounts of vandalism done to its pages.

=== Kiwi Farms ===

==Interviews with Chris ==

Over the course of Chris's life, he has experienced many fascinating events, and received plenty of attention. Naturally, this piques the curiosity of others, and this has culminated in many '''interviews''' with Chris, whether through the Internet or in the flesh. As of October 2017, he will only do an interview if he is going to be [[Chris and his ego|paid for it]].

{{quotebox|Want to Interview Me? You May Now; accepting PAID Interviews. Email sonichumanager@gmail.com to set it up. Payment First and Upfront!}}

=== An Interview with the Chris-Chan ===
{{main|Christian Weston Chandler Interview}}

On the 17th of October [[2008]], Chris was granted his first official interview since his rise to internet fame through [[PSN]].

=== Chris-chan Discusses... ===
{{main|Chris-chan Discusses...}}

Chris-chan Discusses... is a series of interviews where Larry Bundy Jr., formerly known as Guru Larry, asks Chris questions that he usually avoids answering.

=== Arthur Spatchcock ===
{{main|CatKnight Interview}}

Roughly eight years after the PSN interview, CatKnight/MasterDisaster AKA Arthur Spatchcock interviewed Chris, posing as an interested English entrepreneur.

=== Lil E ===
{{main|BraveryJerk Interviews}}

On 8 [[September 2016]], a YouTube user by the name of [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCd3_Cgy53iABR2i8s1L8Dtg Lil E] interviewed Chris at [[The End Games]]. The same individual, this time using his [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvEHyXZ-c1XpGAtG7OmsJdA BraveryJerk] account, interviewed Chris a second time at [[Cville Pride]] 2016.

=== Merryweathery ===

{{main|Internet Dream Lounge}}

On 4 [[September 2017]], Twitter user Merryweathery contacted Chris for an interview. After abandoning the first take for being too boring, he recorded a second interview on 4 October, which he found to be superior, and released it a few days later.

===Sachumo===

{{main|Sachumo}}

===CopperCab===

{{main|CopperCab}}

===Copitz===

{{main|Copitz}}

===Count Dankula===

{{main|Count Dankula}}

== Chris in the news ==

{{See also|Chris in the media}}

Besides gaining attention on social media, Chris' life story is sometimes broadcasted on public news. An infamous example of this is the news story of the [[Fire|destruction of his house]] on 10 January 2014.

== Chris as a journalist ==

Chris has always had a compulsion to document his own life, only talking about topics that affect him, and only using his publications to further express himself. During his trials and tribulations on [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] he took it upon himself to publish a newslettler. Funnily enough, his style is reminiscent of [[Wikipedia: Yellow journalism| Yellow Journalism]], being characterized by:

*[[Sonichu's News Dash#An indirect appeal to Mary|Scare headlines]] in huge print, often of [[Sonichu's News Dash#New Sonichu comics|minor news]].
*Lavish use of pictures, or imaginary drawings.
*Use of faked interviews, misleading headlines, pseudoscience, and [[Sonichu's News Dash#Chris's dating tips|a parade of false learning from so-called experts]].
*Emphasis on full-color Sunday [https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews2.htm supplements], usually with comic strips.
*Dramatic sympathy with the "underdog" [[Sonichu's News Dash#Chris on PowerWeb|against the system]].

Chris [[Chris and his Ego|being Chris]] also incorporates elements from [[Wikipedia: Tabloid journalism| Tabloid journalism]], such as:

*[[Mary Lee Walsh|Sensational crime stories]]
*Gossip columns about [[Christian Weston Chandler|celebrities]] and [[Bionic the Hedgehog|sport stars]]
*Junk food news

After watching Sachumo's [[Documentary]] about him, Chris gave his own ideas about the production of a similar piece. To the surprise of no one he wanted to focus [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|more on the positives]], like the people whose lives have been made better by [[Trolls|interacting with him]].

===Idea Guy===

Since Early November 2017, Chris has been getting the latest news about CWCville from an anonymous troll known by the alias "[[Idea Guy]]".

== See Also ==

*[[Chris in the media]]
*[[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
*[[Wikipedia]]
*[[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki]]
*[[Sonichu's News Dash]]

== Sources ==

<references/>

{{Chris and}}

Michael Snyder

2018-06-27T17:23:47Z

MindHit: /* The hatred continues */

{{quote|I hope that God will forgive you for being so heartless and cruel, Michael Snyder!... '''JEW!'''|Chris, in [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]}}

{{infobox
| title = Michael Snyder
| image = [[Image:HNI 0022-cropped.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Name
|data1 = Michael John Snyder
|label2 = Also known as
|data2 = Mike
|label4 = Gender
|data4 = Male
|label5 = Nationality
|data5 = [[United States|American]]
|label6 = [[Chris and race|Race]]
|data6 = White
|label7 = Religion
|data7 = '''''JEW''''' (according to Chris)
|label8 = Occupation
|data8 = [[Manajerk]], [[The GAMe PLACe]] (to 2011) Owner, Cville's Hobbies, Games, and Toys (2011-2014)
}}

'''Michael John "Mike" Snyder''' (Hebrew: מִיכָאֵל ג'ון „מייק“ שניידר) is one of [[Chris]]'s many enemies. He was the [[manajerk|manager]] of [[The GAMe PLACe]] (later known as Cville's Hobbies, Games, and Toys), a [[video games|game]] and [[Toys|hobby]] store that was in [[Charlottesville]]. Chris regularly caused trouble at the PLACe and was eventually permabanned in June [[2008]]. Based on his surname, Chris came to the incorrect conclusion that Snyder was Jewish, [[Niggos|yet]] [[Chris and race|another]] [[Homos|minority]] Chris seems to hate for no reason.

Due to his [[Naïve|misguided]] belief that he had genuine friends at the PLACe, Chris developed a burning hatred for Snyder over the years, describing him as a "bastard",<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref> a "[[JERKS|jerk]]",<ref>[[Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up]]</ref> a "pigheaded, stubborn Jew",<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 2]]</ref> "cold-hearted and mean",<ref>[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]</ref> a "sonofabitch",<ref>[[May 2013 Facebook Posts|I have had more freedom when my father was alive]]</ref> and "[[pedofork|CHILDREN-FUCKING-DAMNED]]".<ref>[[June 2012 Facebook posts|Damn Michael Snyder]]</ref>

In June 2010, Chris had a [[Son-Chu|run-in]] with Snyder when he tried to take his picture at the PLACe, and on [[28 October 2011]] both Barb and Chris committed a more serious attack on him for which they were both convicted. Legal punishment has done nothing to check Chris's rage.

__TOC__

{{clear}}

==At the GAMe PLACe==
{{quote|That was why the Son of a Bitch Jew kicked me out of The Game Place, Permanently, After YEARS of Loyal Volunteer Service in the Pokemon TCG League. I had apologized numerously before, but he's still the pigheaded, stubborn Jew he was then.|[[Katie Bay E-mails 2|Chris, being his usual humble self.]]}}

Chris's behavior offended the store's management in a number of ways. Aside from punting his gym leader duties, he scared the small children he played card games with, picked fights with other players, and let his racism and homophobia shine. He would also take his video game consoles into The GAMe PLACe and commandeer the shop's flat-screen TV for considerable amounts of time, loudly sing along to [[Britney Spears]] during games, pitch fits inspired by his hatred of the [[HEXBox]] in the store, and much more.<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A]]</ref> In April 2008, Chris's behavior got him a two-week ban from the store.

The trigger for his permanent ban on 6 June [[2008]]<ref>This date is arrived at by an analysis of Chris's letters to Katie Bay, Blanca, and his Game Place friends. Mimms' claim that the permanent ban took place in August does not hold up.</ref> was a shouting match with a black kid. It was on that day that Mike permanently banned Chis from the store; although, as Mimms claimed, he "was looking for any reason to ban him at this point." Michael himself would later recall, in a response to one of Chris's videos, "I remember you as a child creeping out all the other pokemon kids, including my own, because even [[2000|10 years ago]] you were an angry, unsportsmanlike punk".<ref>[[Greene County Conspiracy#Michael Snyder's reply]]</ref>

Predictably, Chris did his best to appeal his permaban. He brought his parents in to argue his case with Michael Snyder, to which Michael responded by calling the [[police]]. Despite a fierce rejoinder by his mother [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]], Chris and his family failed to move either Michael or the cops, and every indication was that Chris would never be allowed back into the store.

==Years of hatred==
{{Quote|And I also hope that the Game and Hobby Place in Charlottesville… [[Destruction Of Chris's House|BURNS TO THE GROUND]]! ALONG WITH MICHAEL SNYDER!|Chris|[[Autism Tutorial Part 3]], February 2011}}
[[File:AskMichaelSnyder.jpg|thumb||Chris at war with Michael.]]

Chris has given many different explanations for why he was banned, but has never believed it was justified. In the [[Jackie e-mails]], Chris claimed that he had been thrown out of the store much earlier than Mimms indicates, in June 2008. It was in this month, according to Chris, that Michael Snyder forced him to stop hogging the TV for his Wii. Doing this apparently caused a number of kids to miss out on obtaining a few trade-only evolution Pokémon. Chris got angry, and snatched a card box to write "Michael Snyder Loves the 'F' out of [[Mary Lee Walsh]]" on it. This so-called "Wii incident," Chris claimed, was Michael's last straw which precipitated the ban. This account is [[List of Chris's Lies|almost certainly false]]; apart from contradicting Mimms' more objective account, Chris predictably tries to paint himself as getting one up on Snyder, and assumes that Mike would know or care what a Mary Lee Walsh is.

On another occasion, however, Chris claimed that "Michael was scared of me and and uh, he was afrai- and he was uh, preoccupied with his crackpot theory of me scaring his- scaring his... customers away, so he banned me from the store".<ref>[[Sydney Kirsch]]</ref> In December 2013, his explanation was, "he has his hangups against me (still has them); he's either frightened or angry at me for the one or two times I let out a loud shout when there was too much going on at the time and I couldn't take it anymore".<ref>[[Rebeckah Bentley E-mails]]</ref> At other times, he has assumed that Mike is prejudiced against autistic individuals, and had discriminated against him. In any case, while Chris has sometimes admitted that he caused some small problems, he has not felt that they justified a permanent ban, and he blames Snyder's overreaction on an irrational hatred.

Even worse, from Chris's perspective, Michael refused to accept his numerous apologies and lift the ban. In March 2009, Chris made a clearly self-serving [[YouTube]] video apology to Michael and asked to be readmitted to the PLACe. The following month he tried again, posting an apology on the sidebar of another video. Yet again in October 2010, Chris made a bogus YouTube apology in order to look better to his [[Jackie|girlfriend]]. None of them had any effect. On 12 April 2010, Chris trespassed to pay a personal visit to Michael at the PLACe, and [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|tried to apologize]] in an attempt to get the ban lifted. Michael said no. Chris quickly dissolved into fury, [[South Park|yelling "Jew"]] as an insult and flipping him off. Michael attempted to get the fuzz, but by the time they got there Chris had already scrammed.

Unable to comprehend Michael's actions, Chris came to suspect that some greater conspiracy was at work. As the organized trolling of Chris shifted into high gear, Chris wondered if Michael was somehow behind it all. "What are you, A CONFIRMED INTERNET TROLL?!!!," he asked in July 2009. In May 2010, he put forth the theory that Greene County, Virginia school board officials had persuaded Michael to ban him, for no other reason than to make his life miserable. Perhaps because of this conspiratorial mindset, Chris seems to have jumped to his conclusion that Michael was Jewish on account of his last name. In [[100 2178|his May 2010 video]], Chris called Michael "GOD-DAMN, GREEDY... SNYDER," seeming to restrain himself from calling Snyder a "greedy Jew". In fact, "Schneider" is a German surname meaning "tailor" (and "Snyder" descends from the Dutch word for "cutter"). While some German Jews might have wound up with the name by anglicizing the Jewish surname "Sznajder", it doesn't necessarily denote Jewish heritage at all. The bottom line is that Michael is not Jewish.

[[Matthew Noble call|A phone call]] on 10 August 2010 indicated that [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] (and, presumably, Barb as well) shared Chris's idea of the GAMe PLACe as Troll Central:

{{Quote|Mike's been [[Kick the Autistic|persecuting him]] for years and I don't like Mike. I'd like to speak to the owner of the place I think lives up here, up the road from me. In Madison or somewhere. This whole thing is a setup from the very beginning with my son. Now I don- didn't like it then and I still don't like it... Mike and [[Megan Schroeder|Megan]] are the ones that conspired together with a couple of other people- kids there that I think were [[Homos|gay]], to persecute and torment Christian for years.|Bob. Oh, Bob.}}

On [[6 June 2010]], Chris had a few beers and drove to the PLACe to make a [[CWC is Angry|dartboard]] out of Mike's picture. When several people came out of the store to confront him, Chris got back in his car and attempted to flee, nearly hitting Snyder twice as he attempted to block Chris's escape. Two [[jerkops|police officers]] present at the shopping center stopped the fracas. At that moment Michael appeared on YouTube and commented "Christian is in my parking lot right now being grilled by the police. He [[Pedofork|took pictures of my daughter]] and tried to run me over with [[Son-Chu|his car]]. They witness this, and I bet they still do nothing about it." The officers listened to both sides, and then let Chris off with a warning after making him delete the pictures he'd taken. To present his side of the story, Chris posted an incredibly delusional [[6 June 2010|video]] in which he claimed that Michael had jumped on top of his hood and shouted, "YOU'RE DEAD! YOU'RE DEAD!" He admitted to trying to flee from the police, and saw nothing wrong with his actions. Chris would tell a very similar fanciful story of [[26 December 2014|another assault]] four years later. Chris didn't tell his parents about this incident.<ref>[[Matthew Noble call]]</ref>

Chris's hatred of Michael only grew. He began to insinuate that Michael was a child molester based on no evidence whatsoever.<ref>[[Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]</ref> He also assumed that Michael was a violent maniac. While making plans to visit the store in April 2010, Chris wrote, "I pray he won't get violent; if he does, I will defend myself".<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 2]]</ref> On another occasion he said that he was so afraid of Mike that he did not want to confront him while "unarmed" and alone.<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 2]]</ref> Ironically, Chris himself has on many occasions expressed violent urges against Michael, whether it was telling [[Lars]] that he would shoot Michael if he had a gun,<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref> or wishing that the PLACe would burn down with Mike inside.<ref>[[Autism Tutorial Part 3]]</ref>

==Shit gets real==
[[File:Snider.jpg|thumb|200px|Artist's impression of the Jew-Spider]]
{{main|28 October 2011}}
On [[28 October 2011]], just a few weeks after Bob's death, Chris and Barb launched a vehicular assault on the newly christened "Cville's Hobbies, Games, and Toys," newly owned by Snyder. Chris and Barb both hit the proprietor with their vehicle and injured him. They were arrested near the scene and spent a day in jail. Both faced felony charges for failure to stop after an accident, while Chris also had trespassing and misdemeanor assault, and Barb had a second felony charge for assault on a [[Jerkop|law enforcement official]]. Mike filed a civil suit against them both.

The trial was held on 10 July 2012. Despite his past history with the Chandlers, Snyder magnanimously pushed for leniency in the court case, as he did not want Chris to get a felony on his record. As part of the plea bargain, however, he apparently insisted on his medical bills being paid in full by the Chandlers. This prompted Chris to openly refer to Snyder as a "thieving liar" '''in court''' (though Snyder himself was not in attendance), showing a complete lack of gratitude to a man who had showed an amazing level of kindness considering the circumstances.<ref>[[This is how the Trial went|First-hand report by Cyan and Indigo]]</ref>

In September 2013, Chris's felony charge was amended to a misdemeanor, and his sentence was suspended.
{{-}}

==The hatred continues==
{{quote|I hate Snyder with a passion for destroying my life the way he did.|Chris following the trial.}}
[[File:Sept13 Imgur 30.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's [[LEGO]] voodoo doll of Snyder. He shakes this container and holds it upside down to torture him.]]

Chris learned nothing from this run-in with the law, and his anger towards Michael intensified. As with the previous run-in, Chris related an extremely distorted account of the incident immediately after the fact. "Mike twice made his own deliberate leg scars, rubbing his legs on our bumper, banged our hood and fell backwards; we had NOT moved our van at either instance of him faking his falls." What's more, according to Chris, Mike had set a "trap" by posting a sign saying that there was a "new owner," inducing him and his mother to enter the store. Chris has never deviated from this interpretation. The fact that Michael actually won the court case shocked Chris, and he saw this as a theft by Michael.

As Chris continued to dwell on these issues, he came up with a new conspiracy to explain his original ban. In this version, [[Megan]] had recruited Michael into a conspiracy to destroy his life. Just as Chris and his parents had been coming close to discovering this Game PLACe conspiracy in 2008, Michael had banned him. Furthermore, as part of the "trap" Michael had laid on 28 October 2011, he had bribed the police to beat him up and falsify their reports. By September 2013, he regarded Michael, Megan and [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as some sort of axis of evil, "the Top Three Fiends and Enemies of my lifetime; the ones who actually have Devastated my Heart, my Soul, my Reputation Online AND in Person/Real Life, my Emotions, AND my Life in General all-around."<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Voodoo-Wise]]</ref>

Chris claimed that he randomly encountered Snyder in public some time in August 2013:

{{quotebox|WTH... The same [[Manajerks|Manajerk]] of Cville's Hobbies, Games and Toys gave me the finger at [[List of restaurants#Sheetz|Sheetz]] in [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]], and threatened me with "Relax, I'm not going to hurt you" in my face at [[McDonald's|McDonalds]] in Ruckersville; both in the same Morning a few weeks ago. I did not respond to either at the times. He violate [sic] his own "restraining order."<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Offline Troll/Bully]]</ref>}}

Chris clearly interpreted Mike's calming words as a threat. He also displayed his characteristic ignorance of [[Chris and the Law|the law]] - Chris was required to keep away from Snyder, not vice versa. This is Snyder's last known interaction in regards to Chris.

By June 2014, Cville's Hobbies, Games and Toys had been closed for unknown reasons. Chris took some comfort from this, assuming that Michael's "get-rich-quick scheme" of filing the civil suit had somehow failed.<ref>[[Medallions|The Mr. Smith Situation]]</ref> Whether Michael succumbed to Chris's curses, emigrated to Israel, or met some other fate is unclear.

As of August 2017, Chris not only still believes Mike Snyder set him up, but also blames him for [[Chris and money|blowing all of Bob's pension]] during the [[This is how the Trial went|2012 trial]]. Because [[Chris and reality|"Mike rubbing his legs against Chris' car" is somehow to blame]], as opposed to hiring an [[Rob Bell|expensive lawyer]].<ref>[[August 2017 Facebook posts#Chris still blames Snyder for everything]]</ref>

Mike also had a YouTube account, ''TheRcholic'', which he famously used to provide details of the 4 June 2010 incident and to reply directly to Chris on his [[Greene County Conspiracy]] video. The account was closed at an unknown time.

{{-}}

==See also==
*[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]
*[[6 June 2010]]
*[[28 October 2011]]
*[[The GAMe PLACe]]

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
*[https://web.archive.org/web/20100421005416/http://www.youtube.com/user/TheRcholic YouTube account] (archived)

{{People}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Snyder, Michael}}
[[Category:Manajerks]]
[[Category:The GAMe PLACe]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]

Chris and his ego

2018-06-26T16:50:38Z

MindHit: Adding screenshot of paranoia example

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{quote|Firstly, YOU WISH YOU WERE ME...|Chris, [[Mailbag 10#Rejected Mailbag|Mailbag 10 (Rejected)]].}}
{{quote|For every one that exalteth himself shall be humbled; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.|[[Chris and religion|Luke 14:11 (King James Version)]]}}

[[File:CWCnormanrockwell.jpg|thumb|right|A perfect rendition of our beloved author.]]

'''Egotism''' is the most important and self-destructive of [[Chris]]'s flaws. It is this egotism that may one day lead to someone playing [[Kick the Autistic]] in real life.

[[Image:SchuComic0P44.jpg|thumb|'''Egotism''', (noun): the belief that your pain (getting kicked out of the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|mall]] for being creepy) trumps all others (divorce and loss of beloved wife, children and home).]]

==Origins==
{{Quote|When you don't have people in your life pushing you, can you push yourself?|[[Raspberry Swirl|Tori Amos]]}}

Why is Chris such an egotist? In his sheltered childhood, his enabling parents taught him to [[Chris_and_remorse#Shifting_blame|shift blame for all of his troubles]] to other people. A sense of entitlement, again homegrown, skewed his perception of the proportionality between his [[Stress|problems]] and those of other people. Chris doesn't completely lack empathy; he isn't a sociopath, but the internal 'scale' by which he weighs the importance of himself against that of others tilts far in his favor. The problem was compounded by his [[autism]], making it difficult for him to understand social cues and relate normally to his peers. [[Chris and reality#In the Real World|He grew up in a different world.]]

But that explains why Chris ''was'' an egotist, ''struggled with'' egotism, or ''has tendencies towards'' egotism. While Chris's childhood was less than ideal, it shouldn't have been quite so crippling. Time and experience should have helped temper his ego, and his [[Cole Smithey|half-brother]] supposedly suffered far worse and still managed to make something of himself. But Chris's development appears to have completely stopped altogether. Chris is still an egotist because he lives in a social time capsule that has allowed him to carry on for over a decade without a single life lesson. And he still lives in that time capsule because it is easy, it is comfortable, and [[Anna McLerran|people]] [[William Elliott Waterman|let]] [[White knights|him]].

===The enablers===
[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|Exhibit A.]]
{{quote|Drunk or not, they had me. At an old age where my mother was so close to menopause and my father was a senior citizen. [[Chris and reality|I was truly a miracle]].|Chris, [[Mumble 3]]}}

Chris's parents are enablers ''par excellence''. There is no earthly reason why (barring unrelated catastrophes) a 30-year-old man with autism should live at home with his parents, especially when his autism is as "[[Slow-in-the-minds|high functioning]]" as Chris's activity and his documentation exemplify it to be. Adults with far more crippling mental health problems, from emotional disorders to mental retardation, live far more independently than Chris does.

For children like Chris, special education in public school is generally geared toward helping the child understand how their disorder affects their lives, and what strategies they can use to minimize its impact. This is a well-documented and well-supported strategy, but it relies on "buy-in." Chris's parents clearly never bought into these strategies, because they never fostered any interest in instilling any form of independence in Chris, thus undermining the entire regimen of special education and ending up with a man-child with entitlement issues.

===Monthly tugboat===
{{Main|Chris and money}}
{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job.|Chris, taking pride in being a lazy fuck.}}

Chris receives welfare from the government; a "[[monthly tugboat]]" as he calls it. Although intended to supplement the money he would receive at a low-paying job, Chris continues to abuse the welfare system because he is simply unwilling to work on anything except [[mass debating]], playing [[vidya]], and [[Love Quest|stalking young women.]]

Regardless of whether Chris is abusing the welfare system, his parents are abusing it through him, or the system itself is flawed, the fact remains that the monthly tugboat that he receives is a major factor in making Chris's lifestyle — and thus his world view — sustainable.

===Blind luck and the cherry picking fallacy===
[[Image:SlamAttack.jpg|thumb|Local Boy Levels Up.]]
[[Image:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg|thumb|left|Article in PVCC's ''Forum'', proof that some people have too much time on their hands.]]
[[Image:Famewhore.jpg|thumb|McIntire Park.]]

A [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes|contest]] or [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|two]] here; a [[Chris Chan in the PokéNews|9-second local TV blip]] there. The results are that outside events most people never experience have stroked Chris's already monstrous ego.

Consider that Chris has produced a ''huge'' volume of fan mail, letters-to-the-editor, [[Internet]] commentary, and other drivel. Each letter to [[Nintendo]] is a message in a bottle: most of them never return, but the one that does—on an official letterhead, and addressed to Mr. C. W. Chandler—is confirmation of his celebrity.<ref>[[An Official Sonichu Update]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Yeah...it says here that, uh, yeah...they—th—it goes on to say that:

:"Nintendo of America has some of the most devoted, enthusiastic fans of any game developer. Each week, they receive, uh, hundreds of thousands of suggestions about their games and systems. While they would love to, uh, use ideas from f—fa—from fans to develop actual products, due to the volume of the, uh, requests they receive and the resources it would take to process them, they do not accept unsolicited game or product ideas. But they are committed to being at the leading edge of game and hardware development, though, and they can be sure that they are constantly at work developing new and exciting products and game ideas."

Now, uh, here's the interesting part...where they quote about how I can actually...go further about ch—about them changing their minds and actually accepting the idea and helping me, uh, makin' it—makin' it totally real...with the video games and the TV animations and the action figures, and...officially-released—my personally-approved... medals... ''[...]'' they say that, uh, the best way to let other fans know about my idea or to generate hype about the future game I'd like to see is to post the ideas to the forums on their sites.}} 

[[Honor roll|The concept of form letters does not seem to occur to Chris]], who seems to think the letter was written specifically for him. As if Chris didn't think his material was golden to begin with, he got a second nod from ''Nintendo Power'' for his epic [[Animal Crossing Documentary]], and a page in the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]]'s ''Forum'' is just icing on the cake. Even before his e-fame, Chris had plenty of evidence to convince himself that he ''was'' creative, and not just a high-volume, whiny jerk that had pestered his way to acknowledgement. As he graduated from PVCC in [[2006]], his writing shows that [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] was, in his mind, already tested: there was just some small threshold of notoriety or connections that needed to be breached, in order to become a true media sensation.

On top of that, Chris has a huge amount of free time to inject himself into situations like the [[McIntire Park]] meetings, which allows him to cherry-pick more moments of recognition. A tongue-in-cheek acknowledgement by the local council seems cute to us, but is serious business to him. And since Chris cherry-picks only the reinforcement that he wants, his legions of [[troll]]s just add to the fire. Delusion led him to believe that he had a legion of fans, for a time; a few hundred emails in his inbox confirmed it.

==Narcissistic personality disorder==

{{quote|I, was mistaken, but not wrong|Chris<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/November_2017_Facebook_posts#Mistaken_about_being_linked_with_Uzume</ref>}}

[[Image:Narcissus.jpg|thumb|A [[TRUE and HONEST]] depiction of narcissism.]]

It's entirely possible however, that Chris suffers from [[Wikipedia:Narcissistic personality disorder|narcissistic personality disorder]], whose diagnosis criteria detail many of the characteristics that Chris exhibits.

{{quotebox|The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders fourth edition, DSM V, a widely used manual for diagnosing mental disorders, defines narcissistic personality disorder (in Axis II Cluster B) as:

The essential features of a personality disorder are impairments in personality (self and interpersonal) functioning and the presence of pathological personality traits. To diagnose narcissistic personality disorder, the following criteria must be met:

A. Significant impairments in '''personality''' functioning manifest by:

1. Impairments in '''self functioning''' (a or b):

a. '''Identity''': Excessive reference to others for self-definition and self-esteem regulation; exaggerated self-appraisal may be inflated or deflated, or vacillate between extremes; emotional regulation mirrors fluctuations in self-esteem.

b. '''Self-direction''': Goal-setting is based on gaining approval from others; personal standards are unreasonably high in order to see oneself as exceptional, or too low based on a sense of entitlement; often unaware of own motivations.

AND

2. Impairments in '''interpersonal functioning''' (a or b):

a. '''[[Chris and death|Empathy]]''': Impaired ability to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others; excessively attuned to reactions of others, but only if perceived as relevant to self; over- or underestimate of own effect on others.

b. '''Intimacy''': Relationships largely superficial and exist to serve self-esteem regulation; mutuality constrained by little genuine interest in others‟ experiences and predominance of a need for personal gain

B. Pathological personality traits in the following domains:

1. '''Antagonism''', characterized by:

a. '''Grandiosity''': Feelings of entitlement, either overt or covert; self-centeredness; firmly holding to the belief that one is better than others; condescending toward others.

b. '''Attention seeking''': Excessive attempts to attract and be the focus of the attention of others; admiration seeking.

C. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual's personality trait expression are relatively stable across time and consistent across situations.

D. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual's personality trait expression are not better understood as normative for the individual‟s developmental stage or sociocultural environment.

E. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual's personality trait expression are not solely due to the direct physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug of abuse, medication) or a general medical condition (e.g., severe head trauma).}}

As you can see, these criteria describe Chris, right down to the sense of entitlement. Then again, many of the symptoms described match a typical diagnosis of autism. He may have both. [http://samvak.tripod.com/journal72.html Further reading is required to confirm the difference.]

==Manifestations==
Chris's egotism manifests itself in a variety of ways.

===Unwarranted self-importance===
[[Image:Apology to Mary Lee.jpg|thumb|Very gracious.]]
{{See also|True and Loyal Fanbase}}
{{quote|I have had way over a million fans worldwide since I went online in before [[2000]].|-Chris, [[Mailbag 48]].}}

As overwhelming as Chris's unwarranted self-importance is, it's easy for the novice [[troll|observer]] to get lost in the sea of [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] shit and assume that he's just confident in his e-fame. "Of course," you say, "he's got a billion hits on [[YouTube]] and a thousand emails in his mailbox. He's going to think he's hot shit, like every other retard on the [[DeviantArt|internet]]."

But nothing sums up Chris's deep and abiding USI like this missive to [[Mary Lee Walsh]]:<ref>[[Mary Lee Walsh#Emails with Mary|Emails with Mary]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Mary, I've slept on it, and [[Chris's Wikipedia profile#The Continuing, Enduring Search|I have realized that note-hanging is not the way to get attention]]. And I don't really want to meet with either you nor Susan, no offense. I'll tell you what, let's forget the meeting, and if you will allow my newsletter to stay in distribution, I will do all of the following:

*I will never hang notes on the wall again.
*I'll consider stopping my Silent Treatment on Susan.
*I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my [[scale of Respect]] each by 2 points (0=No Respect...10=Respect).

Please reply via E-Mail.

Christian C.}}

E-fame just adds a whole new dimension. He was a misunderstood genius before; now he's a misunderstood genius with a personal army:

{{quote|III'M. WOR-KIN'. ON IT! LET ME DO THAT STUPID VIDEO SO I CAN TELL E'RRYBODY, IN MY COMMAND, TO GET EVERYTHIN'- HELP ME GET EVERYTHIN' OFF THE INTERNET!|Chris, [[THAT IS MY HOUSE]]}}

It's so bad now that when Chris meets someone new who claims not to know who he is, he seems skeptical and surprised.<ref>Exchange with the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]], [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Meet the Pickle .2801:21:44 - 01:25:29.29|Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

{{quote|Y'all should know me by now, but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, back on March 17th, 2000.|Chris, in his [[CWC's Second Message|second YouTube video]]}}

The instant gratification, instant acknowledgment, and instant attention—good or bad—that has come with his minor e-fame of the last few years has thoroughly convinced Chris that people ''do'' read everything he writes, and that his YouTube messages ''invariably'' get to his target audience.

{{quote|I realize I am famous like a princess|Chris on Twitter in October 2017}}

He also describes himself as "managing the varsity team"<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_7/Page_22]</ref> in high school, when actually he was a waterboy.

But if, even after all of this, you're ''still'' not convinced that Chris has unwarranted self-importance issues, consider this little tidbit: he posted autographed pictures of himself on [[eBay]]. Looking like this<ref>[[:File:Chris-chan 010714.JPG]]</ref> [[Chris_and_health#Hygiene|no]] [[Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F|less]]. Make of that what you will.

===Fixation on self-image===
Chris has created many avatars of himself through several mediums.

<center><gallery>
File:Comic CWC.PNG|[[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)]].
File:Chris Lego.jpg|As a Lego figure.
File:ThreePieceSetA.jpg|''Super Smash Bros.'' avatar for Christian.
File:ThreePieceSetC.jpg|''Super Smash Bros.'' avatar for Christine.
File:AmiiboSet.jpg|As [[Sonichu Amiibo|Amiibos]]. From left to right, Christian, Chris Chan Sonichu, Christine. Chris sold these through [[Etsy]].
File:Lego Christines.png|Another Lego figure of his 2015 [[Tomgirl]] self.
File:Cwc and vinyl dolls at Cville Pride 2016.jpg|[[Christine Doll]], pictured on left.
File:Chris skylanders avatar.jpg|''Skylanders'' avatar.
File:Skylanders swag.png|A shirt, card and 3D figure of his ''Skylanders'' avatar, costing him $90 from the company.
File:Cwc transformer1.jpg|As a Transformer.
File:Miss Night Star.jpeg ‎|As a ''[[My Little Pony|MLP]]'' character.
File:Christine Night Weston Star Chandler.jpg|It's just getting ridiculous.
File:Chris, Night Star Equestria Girls Mini dolls3.jpg|Christine Doll 2.0, next to Night Star, both blatant self-inserts.
</gallery></center>

===Persecution complex===
[[Image:Issue4.jpg|thumb|Saint Christian the Martyr, walking through the shadow of the valley of death.]]

Chris has a lot of problems, and even the ones he "takes responsibility for" are still "out of his hands". His [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|school]] was [[Kick the Autistic|mean to him]], he didn't deserve that [[Song of Christian|F in English]] or the one in [[CADD Chef|CADD]], ''and'' he doesn't deserve the 24/7 [[trolls|trolling]], among other things.

And if that wasn't enough, he thinks every authority figure in the land is conspiring against his [[Love Quest]]:

{{quote|Then in Mid-October, the Quote/Unquote "Dean of Student Services," Mary Lee Walsh, approached me and pulled my sign away from me and told me, "You're NOT ALLOWED TO FIND TRUE LOVE HERE." MY HEART WAS SHATTERED that very moment.|Chris, on his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Enter_the_Wicked_Witch_of_the_Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens|Wikipedia userpage]]}}

It doesn't help that he's engaged in a [[Family Guy|quagmire]] of a war against the [[homo]] rumors that those DAMNED TROLLS keep spreading about him, with a second front versus the [[Chris and copyright|copyright]]-violating [[Liquid Chris|thieves]].

{{quote|It's out of my control! I don't know where to go! I DUNNO KNOW WHERE TA GO!|Chris, [[THAT IS MY HOUSE]].}}

After the release of [[100 2178|May 8 video]] in which Chris blames the Greene County's school board for pretty much every misfortune in life -- from being banned from [[The GAMe PLACe]] to becoming the social outcast that we all know and tolerate -- thereby cementing the notion that Chris will never take responsibility for his actions. The only time Chris had actually stepped up and admitted responsibility was the accidental formatting of his [[PS3]].

===Naïveté===
{{Main|Naïve}}

Chris's simple-mindedness and gullibility are legendary. Like [[George W. Bush]], he only deals in absolutes: either you're with him or you're against him. This has been very obvious in his answers to the [[Mailbag]], where he refuses to listen to any talk — even from professionals — about the similarities between [[Asperger's syndrome]] and autism, denies that there are any shortcomings in his work, and shrugs off any advice about how to improve his health or appearance, labeling anyone who suggests he has any kind of shortcoming a troll.

Chris equates [[honesty]] with divulging every last detail about his life. Nothing is too candid for Chris - getting haircuts, drinking his own [[navy]], [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shitting his pants]], or even giving away his phone number and home address! The only thing he hasn't done with wild abandon is give away his social security number, and when that happens, it probably won't be a surprise to anybody.

His gullibility is astounding. No matter how many times it's happened before, Chris is easily led around by trolls promising china or threatening his identity. The earlier trolling schemes (such as [[Blanca]], [[PandaHalo]] and [[Jimmy Hill]]) got Chris to jump through hoops and exposed so much information about Chris and his personality that they had to start [[CWCki|this very wiki]] to keep track of it all. Another example of Chris's gullibility is one Miss [[Jackie|Jacklyn Romy]], a 'sweetheart' Chris met earlier in 2011. Despite her obviously being a troll (proven by a -mysterious leak of videos that were sent only to Jackie on [[February 2012]]), Chris has re-friended her on Facebook after blocking her the previous April. Only time would tell if we end up seeing Chris [[Cosplay|cosplaying]] or [[Cakefarts|making an ass of himself]] again in a video aimed only at Jackie. It's pretty obvious that Chris had only done this because he believed that he would score with Jackie sooner or later.

In [[2009]] and [[2010]], Chris slowly began to "learn" to distrust trolls or to keep more of his [[PSN|information]] secure. However, many of his trolls believe this is akin to putting a shock collar on an [[Patti|animal]]. Eventually, in order to stop being shocked (not because they actually understand or care) an animal will start doing as it is told.

===Hubris: the pride before the fall===
[[File:Mother's day 2018 2.jpg|thumb|It's fair to say that Chris is a bit of a narcissist.]]
{{quote|I'd say... I'd say I'm all around. You see, the problem is that I have too many skills that I am good at. You might say that I am a jack of all trades and a master of none.|Chris, [[Mumble 3|right about that last part]]}}

Numerous times, Chris has shown that he believes he has powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal [[slow-in-the-minds|autistics]]. In fact, so much so that this attitude has transcended mere hubris, instead it more resembles mental illness: not only is Chris convinced that his [[Chris and writing|writing]], [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|musical]] [[Guitar Hero|talents]], and [[She Came for CWC|art]] are without peer, he also believes he has supernatural powers along the lines of [[Chris and religion|Wicca or Voodoo]].

And he doesn't just have the power to create: his is also the power to destroy. This line of thinking is exemplified by Chris's acceptance that [[Ryan Cash]] committed suicide just because he withheld ''Sonichu'' updates, and would worsen when he believed that his [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]] actually caused [[Liquid Chris]] and Mary Lee Walsh to have some sort of horror befall them.

But those are just the most insane moments of cognitive dissonance. What about the time he went into hysterics when he didn't get recognition for his art at high school graduation?

{{quote|I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt crestfallen greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!|Chris, on his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Graduation|Wikipedia page]]}}

Or his reaction to losing the [[Adam Stackhouse|Parappa Contest]]?

{{quote|So that SWORN ON MY AUTISM, JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED TO THE SEVEN PEOPLE OF THOSE FOUR VIDEOS!!!!|Chris, on the [http://web.archive.org/web/20070830114517/http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm Sonichu Site]}}

[[Image:How chris sees himself.jpg|thumb|What Chris sees when he looks in the mirror.]]

All of the above is consistent with the behavior of small children, who, isolated from the real world by a lack of comprehension and limited mobility, believe themselves to be godlike beings. This belief is gradually destroyed as the child goes to school and encounters outside authority, leading to their acknowledgment of the fact that they are, in fact, ordinary people. Of course, since Chris is not only autistic but also extremely sheltered, he still manages to cling to this belief by focusing on specific aspects of his life and constructing elaborate fantasy worlds. This is also probably why he sees mundane [[chores]] as [[Father Call|horrific trials of strength and will]]. In psychological terms, this can be referred to as ''psychological neoteny'', which is basically the retention of juvenile traits well into physical maturity.

Also consistent with his childlike mindset is his apparent belief that he has supernatural powers. In Freudian terms, this is referred to as ''omnipotence of thought''. Basically, in the same way he does with religion, Chris cherry-picks elements of his life in order to validate his fantasy of control, which is more systematically displayed in the Sonichu comics. Taking this into consideration, it's likely that [[Magi-Chan]] is yet another Mary Sue for Chris, serving as a kind of avatar for his desire for ultimate authority. Why he felt it necessary to make [[Reginald Sneasel|yet]] another [[Sonichu (character)|character]] to fill this role is unclear, considering he's already established [[Chris-chan Sonichu|himself]] as the one true God of CWCville.

Another aspect of Chris's arrogance, and again caused by his childish way of viewing [[Virginia|the world]], is visible in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|a phone call]] with Alec Benson Leary, creator of [[Asperchu]]. In the call it is obvious Chris does not follow a mature procedure for developing a stance on issues. Where normally an individual will learn information about the issue and from there decide how they feel about that issue, Chris does it the other way around and decides how he feels about something, then refuses to believe, understand, or even humor any evidence to the contrary. While most people have very strong beliefs in some issues, so much so that they automatically have a prejudice against people believing differently (e.g. [[Barack Obama|politics]], [[religion]], etc.), Chris has this perspective on everything. He takes a position on matters, then finds ways to back it up and ignores all evidence for the opposing viewpoint. This is called a ''[[Wikipedia:confirmation bias|confirmation bias]]''. For example, Chris has decided homos are bad, so he selectively finds [[Leviticus|information]] that backs up his stance on the matter and ignores anything anyone will tell him about why his homophobia is bad and makes him a bad person. He will then go as far as to pretend he can [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|cure homosexuality]] with his own blood. Unless disliking homosexuals means he [[I'm Sorry, Dude|may not get laid]].

This is most apparent when he takes two contrary positions about a similar topic. The obvious example of this is Chris's understanding of the way [[parody]] functions. Chris will defend his right to make Sonichu to the hilt by claiming it is a parody, but he then states that Asperchu is a bad thing because it is "parody of a parody". As you can see, Chris has decided that he has every right to make Sonichu so he backs this up with statements about his right to parody existing trademarked characters, but conversely he has decided Asperchu is bad, so he supports this position by stating it is a parody of his legitimate work.

A literal example of the 'pride before the fall' would be Chris' series of [[Facebook]] posts between April and June of 2012. In [[April 2012]], Chris believed that he had utterly fooled the trolls when he made a [[Facebook#to_.40cogsdev_from_me.2C_.40CWCSonichu|series]] [[Facebook#Maniacal_Laughter_from_Who_now.3F_Oh.2C_wait.2C_It_Is_ME.21_.3E8D|of]] [[Facebook#Hey.2C_Trollies|posts]] mocking them. He even went so far as to post screenshots of the CWCki forum members talking about it. Note that in several of the screenshots, Chris believed that he had uncovered a scheme to start a poster campaign about him in [[Charlottesville]]. According to his [[Facebook#To_The_Trolls|Facebook post dated 4 June 2012,]] he had called the [[Jerkops|cops]], and basically admitted that he completely fell for it. He then recorded an [[Voicemail_greeting#4_June_2012|angry voicemail greeting]] before quickly deleting it. Compared to [[Voicemail_greeting#30_April_2012|an earlier voicemail he made]], one can clearly see how humbled he was.

===Materialism===
{{quote|I want Julie! Yeah, love is my first priority, but then- but then I want my stuff back!|Chris, caring more about his precious PSN Account and Sonichu website than his [[troll|sweetheart]].}}

It is clear that Chris is a materialist (a common symptom of Narcissistic Personality Disorder), buying and hoarding large amounts of crap that make him feel good about himself. He may even believe that his unhealthy amount of children's toys might attract a [[sweetheart]], when any human being would clearly see that this man is delusional. He also doesn't seem to have a problem with getting money for sitting on his ass, claiming he can get more from his tugboat than he could at an actual job. He has absolutely no concept of money, and believes he is entitled to everything he can buy. This stems from childhood, when Snorlax would take Chris to the toy store and encourage him to talk by giving him toys if he could read their names out loud.<ref>See [[1980s#1989|1989 in Christory]]</ref> Ever since, he's believed that just by being autistic, he deserves everything he can get his grubby hands on.

This mixture of compulsive hoarding, compulsive shopping, and autism is bad news all the way. He compulsively hoards all of his toys and video games because he wants to give them to [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(daughter)|his daughter]] in the future. He also seems to enjoy collecting things, which may explain why Pokémon appeals to him. Chris compulsively buys everything he can on the PS3, and is more concerned with trophies than actual gameplay. Most of the games he's downloaded have never been played. But the important thing is that he ''has'' it. Hoarding items in cases other than OCD is a sign of intellectual disability in older children. He may have inherited this behavior from his parents.

===Tender misanthropy===
A "tender misanthrope" is, by definition, "someone who despises humanity in general, but is ever ready to make an exception for the ''real'' people". In other words, an egotist who pretends to be benevolent. While it's obvious that Chris is an egotist, he truly believes that he's benevolent. He is the perfect example of a tender misanthrope, screaming death threats at what he knows of humanity (seeing as the only social contact he gets is from the [[Internet]]) while also believing that he is a kind, loving person who can [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|give advice]] and [[Pedofork|act as a role model for children]].

Another part of the definition states that "a tender misanthrope feels certain of being able to love real people if only they could be found - or, failing that,to transform existing false people into idealized ''real'' people through social and political programs of the tender misanthrope's own making". The way that Chris treats homos, seeing as he hates them all ([[Mailbag_53#Well,_that_makes_everything_better!|no matter what he says]]) and wants to turn them straight by placing them into co-ed prisons, reprogramming them into straights via concentration camps, or by creating a vaccine that "cures" homosexuality, certainly fits this description. The fact that he also generalizes trolls as homos also supports this. If that does not convince you that Chris feels he can make people into what he can emotionally attach himself to, there are also other obvious examples in his unique delivery of his intentions.

===Disregard of rules of conduct online===
{{Main|Chris and the Internet}}
{{quote|DO NOT DELETE, NOR CENSOR, MY BOMBASTIC PROTEST!!!!!!|Chris, in [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica#4 September|Encyclopedia Dramatica]].}}

Chris has little regard for the rules of online communities; when he joins up on websites, he tends to do things his way. He assumes that his own niche in these websites is under his absolute control: for example, he assumed that [[Wikipedia]] would allow him to post anything on his personal user page, or that Encyclopedia Dramatica would remove material critical to him if he just asked not-so-nicely. Sites like [[deviantART]] and [[YouTube]] allow community participation; Chris simply disallowed comments, or later on, just ignored every comment he received. Chris also assumes that when other people host websites for him (in case of [[CWCipedia]]), he's given the final say on all matters. His record for getting permabanned is currently at two weeks on [[Flipnote Hatena]] when he foolishly tried to re-upload Flipnotes that had been removed for breaking the rules (without bothering to find out why they had been removed in the first place). His Facebook account encountered a cycle in [[July 2015]] where it would be removed and put back up again; some of Chris's post contained sexual content, such as photos of lizards in amplexus, thumbnails of tribadism, screenshots of sexting, and a drawing in which he was drenched in lemonade through a china-shaped lemon--his description for the picture ''bragged'' about how [[JERKS]] would be offended by it.

===Paranoia===

[[File:BKYA_Quite_Possibly_A_Troll.png|thumb|right|Quite possibly a troll.]]

One of the worst things that comes out of Chris's ego is his bloated sense of paranoia. As mentioned above, Chris has taken to withholding certain information from trolls like an animal being shocked by a shock collar. However, this line of thinking has pushed Chris into believing that the entire world is out to get him. In early days, it was actually simple - Jerkops and Mary Lee Walsh were conspiring to stop him from succeeding in his Love Quest. However, after the incident with [[The Wallflower]] and the realization that there's entire webpages devoted to him, it's caused him to see things in a bigger, yet disturbing picture.

As such, Chris has decided to become a recluse, refusing to make friends with anyone unless he knew him in the real world. However, this is a double-edged sword as Chris refuses to interact with anyone in the real world as well. In the real world, if someone spotted Chris and knew him by name, even if they had heard of him from whatever remaining place is left for him to go to, he panics and runs, fearing that the person is actually a troll seeking to spread more information about him across the Internet. As well, if someone wanted to contact Chris through other means, even if that person had no idea who Chris was or what Sonichu was or anything that the trolls had done, Chris will shut them out because he doesn't know who they are and thus, has relegated them to the title of "troll".

A perfect example of this was revealed in a series of Facebook screenshots. While eating at a [[McDonald's]] restaurant, an employee of Burger King spotted him, acknowledged him, then went to mess with his cell phone. Chris went into panic mode, assumed that the worker was actually a troll, then thought the man was "communicating with his own kind" by hopping on a forum. He then proceeded to photograph the man, and talk about him behind his back on Facebook, [[Chris and hypocrisy|ironically doing what he feared the 'troll' would do to him.]]

===Surrendering Information===
{{main|Chris and journalism}}

If there is one thing that Chris's ego would simply not allow, it's suppressing himself from giving away too much information about himself. If he feels that bragging about something would give him a one-up against the trolls or make himself look good, he'll freely announce it for everyone to hear. The most glaring example of this is this entire wiki, which was created using a lot of information provided by Chris himself. Back in the day, Chris viewed himself as an extremely popular internet celebrity with a 'true and loyal fanbase', and, as such, would divulge a lot of information about himself so people would know him better (inclusive of [[Dox|personal information]] that nobody in their right mind would give away). However, there are times when he would do the opposite and [[Honest Content|surrender information that would make him look horrendously bad]], sometimes without provocation. His enthusiastic revelation of his own [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontinence]] is the shining example of this.

Whilst this practice has diminished in recent times with Chris making himself scarce out of fear that trolls would have more [[Tomgirl Pictures|ammo]] to use against him, his habit of needlessly surrendering information still manages to surface. For example, when he claimed to [[Mia Hamm|lose his virginity]], he couldn't help but announce it on his Facebook page, all the while swearing up and down that he would never divulge any details about it to the trolls. Mere weeks later, more details emerged on Facebook, leading to speculation that he actually bought a hooker (since we all know the [[Megan|inevitable]] [[Kacey|end]] result of his Sweetheart Search), which he ended up confirming on 1 May, (along with attending a 'Mythbusters' tour, something which wasn't even brought up but still revealed anyway) all the while claiming to remain button-lipped on the matter. Only time would tell if and when Chris finally reveals everything to silence his nay-sayers. After all, it wouldn't be the first time it's happened. Sure enough, in December 2014, a leaked account of Chris' experience with the hooker was released on the [[Kiwi Farms]]. He just never learns.

In 2013, Chris's habit of needlessly surrendering information returned with a vengeance. Chris threw a temper tantrum on Facebook, and many would have assumed that it was [[Chris and Anger|business as usual]], ''until'' Chris made the fatal mistake of revealing the reason why he went on the warpath; somebody had uploaded his status updates (complete with the ones that were hidden) onto [http://imgur.com/a/1HYJJ an Imgur account.] Aside from the usual whining about how lonely he was, these screencaps not only revealed what he was up to in the silence between 2011 and 2013, but also uncovered a very ugly side of Chris. One post in particular revealed that he was angry at the fact that [[Mimms]] had a girlfriend, and demanded that somebody should ''kill her'', simply because Mimms was a "JERK." The fact remains that the one who revealed all of this unsavory information was not the trolls, as Chris would try to have you believe, but ''himself.''

The next year, Chris encountered a man trying to put out a brushfire near his house. However, he believed he was trying to make it even worse, and thus uploaded the [[Brushfire Video]], wherein he wound up dropping the address of the [[Rental House]] in the video title.

===Fishing for sympathy===
{{quote|I... am so... smart! And yet I still have to- still learn everyth- I still n- have so much to learn.<ref>[[CLog 08142017 - More Positive Content]]</ref>}}

In many conversations with Chris, there have been quite a few instances where he would outright fish for sympathy, in the hopes that people would take pity on him and, in so doing, make him feel better about himself. One such example is the Father Call, where Chris constantly talks about the "trials and tribulations" in his life to an unimpressed [[Matthew Devoria]], from whom he was trying to seek approval to date his daughter (note that said "trials and tribulations" amounted to housework and being teased on the internet.) In his [[Jackie_E-mails_23|later E-mail exchanges]] with Jackie, Chris is quick to paint himself as a misunderstood victim whenever Jackie rips him a new one over issues such as his habit of [[Lie|lying]], being a hypocrite and even being [[Women%27s_rights|inconsiderate towards her]]. Even in recent times, he has not cut out this habit, his Facebook entries blame his trolls for making his life a living hell, one in particular lamenting that nobody cares about him except for his own mother.

The attention he gets from his mother, Barbara Chandler, and his friend, Anna McLerran is textbook mollycoddling at best. Chris has spent his entire life being catered to by his parents (notably well past the point of social acceptance), to the point where he depends on them to bail him out of the [[Money#Credit_cards|numerous]] [[The_Game_Place|messes]] he gets himself into. It comes as no surprise, then, that this, combined with his [[autism|being autistic]], has poisoned Chris' mind into thinking that this is how everybody should treat him, by default. And if people don't see things his way, he'll be more than happy to point out the heavy burdens he faces daily, almost as if he expects them to instantly take back their mean, mean words and feel sorry for him.

The habit of wanting sympathy is so ingrained in Chris that he instinctively hedges when he makes a positive statement about himself. An example is from a video in which he said, "I am so smart," and immediately followed by downplaying it and saying he still had much to learn.

==War against the ego==
One of the main forces opposing Chris's ego are the white knights. These misguided souls have attempted to get Chris to understand that what he's doing is ridiculous and that he needs to grow up. Instead, he brushed them all aside, assuring himself that he was TRUE and HONEST, and could do no wrong. One of the more popular white knights, [[Vivian Gee]], [[Vivitheg's AIM chat|became a troll]] when she couldn't get through to Chris.

When asked to get [[Chris and psychology|real, psychiatric help]], Chris has said that his church counselor, [[Rocky Shoemaker]], is enough for him, and that she could do so much more than someone with ''an actual degree in that field.'' He seems to believe that because her title includes the word "counselor," she is every bit as qualified as a real doctor (the fact that most pastoral counselors see people for free probably helps as well, since Chris would never spend part of his precious monthly tugboat on something useful when there are video games to buy).

There were even some instances where it seemed that the trolls had made a breakthrough by [[Heart level|breaking Chris]], only for him to get right back up again and continue with his antics. An example of this would be Kacey, who led Chris on for a while until she dropped the bombshell that she was going to marry Liquid Chris, but not before having her father point out every single thing that is wrong with Chris. A normal person would have been utterly devastated by this turn of events, and some would even use the experience to better themselves. Chris, on the other hand, perked right up when he [[Red_Letter_CWC_Certified_Day|obtained a letter 'validating' Sonichu]], forgetting about Kacey in mere days, just like she had predicted.

==Examples of Chris's ego in the real world and in the comic==
[[Image:SchuComic8P68.jpg|thumb|250px|[[Jiggliami]] sums it up nicely.]]
{{Main|Examples of Chris's Ego}}
{{Clear}}

==References==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

File:BKYA Quite Possibly A Troll.png

2018-06-26T16:44:56Z

MindHit: 2016's McDonalds' incident when Chris believed a Burger King employee who acknowledged him was out to troll him.

2016's McDonalds' incident when Chris believed a Burger King employee who acknowledged him was out to troll him.

Idea Guys

2018-06-15T06:29:34Z

MindHit: /* Other changes to Sonichu canon */

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Ongoing}}
{{Honest}}

{{infobox
| title = Joshua Wise
| image = [[File:Idea Guy.png|200px]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Name
|data1 = Joshua Wise
|label2 = Also known as
|data2 = Ballzymaker94
|data2 = Idea Guy
|label3 = Date of Birth
|data3 = 22 August 1994 (age {{Age|1994|8|22}})
|label4 = Gender
|data4 = Male
|label5 = Nationality
|data5 = American
|label6 = Race
|data6 = White
}}

'''Joshua Wise''' (known by Chris as '''John Yamada''' and by Chris's fans as "'''Idea Guy'''" or "'''Ballzymaker94'''") was a troll who influenced Chris to add politically incorrect themes and historical references, [[Internet]] memes, and false rumors into his [[Sonichu (comic)|comic]], [[Facebook|social]] [[Twitter|media]] posts, and videos. His aim was likely to see how gullible Chris was, and how little he understands about the world, though Chris's participation may not have been completely voluntary. Chris's interactions with Wise started when he informed Chris that the characters from ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'' were invading CWCville.

In May 2018, Chris suggested that there may be more than one Idea Guy<ref name=callingout>[[May 2018 social media posts#Calling out the weens]]</ref>.

The Idea Guys were removed from power around May 2018<ref name=stillbelievingmarriage>[[May 2018 social media posts#On the Cryzel and Magi-Chan relationship and being blackmailed]]</ref>. Chris stated that he has "very Powerful Allies helping to rectify the situation. I can't say much other than certain people should be Very Frightened right now!"

==Identity==

For months, fans wondered about Idea Guy's identity and fictional bio, as Chris did not disclose that he was in contact with a source. On 22 January 2018, moderators at [[Kiwi Farms]] decided to dox the user known as Ballzymaker94 for being Idea Guy.

With Idea Guy's doxing, Kiwi Farms users also found posts from his accounts there and on Reddit [[White knight|white knighting]] the Idea Guy from criticism and trying to publicize Chris's Idea Guy content in other communities.

==Behind the scenes==
[[File:IdeaGuyCwc News Media2.PNG|thumb|A sample of the fake news Wise used to convince Chris.]]
While under Wise's control, Chris himself kept quiet about the situation, never implying that anyone was taking control of him. However, the many references that he [[Honor roll|did not understand]] were a clear sign of external influence. There were also signs that Chris was coerced or duped into using Wise's ideas, as he appeared uncomfortable in Wise-inspired videos and is often alarmed by the troll's "revelations" about Chris's fictional world.

Some believed that the Idea Guy simply paid Chris. However, fans quickly determined that this was unlikely. The closest anyone came to paying Chris to influence CWCville was when [[William Elliott Waterman|Waterman]] paid him $100 to feature his [[Bananasauros]] character in [[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]], even providing a script, and Chris reacted by openly mocking Waterman and his character in the very pages of the comic, rushing through the plotline and then promptly disregarding the character. Furthermore, whenever people pay Chris for content, he has an established habit of dragging his feet and putting as little effort as he possibly can into the product. Examples of this include [[Paid Video Requests]] and his treatment of high-end clients such as [[DStecks]] and [[Ashuraglitch]].

In marked contrast, Chris appeared to genuinely believe Wise, thinking he was talking to his friends, as evidenced when he freaked out over the revelation of Rosechu being transgender. The [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] also speculated that Wise posed as various characters from CWCville.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/12-06-2017-rosechu-has-a-dick.37132/page-9#post-2831808</ref> This was confirmed when Kiwi Farms users who Wise had contacted in private leaked the details of his methods.

{{quote|He knows he's talking to a dude. The thing is that I used to be part of a roleplay community years ago, so the rest is kind of easy for me. What made this so much easier was telling him Kurome put a curse on the Internet so that any pics taken of the girls he wants to see appear elsewhere in her attempt to make it harder for him to believe. All you gotta do really is make a sound clip on audacity to the girls he wants to here talking, and he buys it.|Wise revealing his master plan.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/idea-guy-joshua-wise-manipulating-the-intellecutally-disabled-for-fun-megathread.37132/page-72#post-2986876</ref>}}

{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Red forest
| video = {{#ev:youtube|R4ZtZzjp5ms}}
| stardate = Unknown
| saga = {{Idea Guy|text}}
| subject = [[Reality]]
| Other = {{Leaked|text}} {{Audio|text}}
| }}

Wise's means of influencing Chris were surprisingly elaborate, taking the form of fake audio clips and photoshopped images which he presented to Chris as documents from CWCville and Gamindustri<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/idea-guy-joshua-wise-manipulating-the-intellecutally-disabled-for-fun-megathread.37132/page-80#post-2988349</ref>. Wise initially played the role of a soldier from Gamindustri named John.

The Kiwi Farms leaks also revealed a large amount of content that Chris made during the saga without releasing publicly, including several pages of [[Sonichu 16|''Sonichu'' #16]] covering the events Wise described to him. The pages show "John" – depicted in a gas mask and body armor from the [[Cherokean Chant|''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.'']] games – asking (real-world) Chris whether he still owns his Dreamcast, which John believes to be a portal to [[CWCville]]. In a page-and-a-half wall of text, Chris summarizes his adventures with John and the ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'' cast, and the salvation of Gamindustri and CWCville from the invaders.

Wise told Chris that [[Magi-Chan]] had a vision that [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]] would be born from Chris [[Homos|anally]] [[Chris and sex#Rape|raping]] Sonichu; despite so blatantly going against Chris's beliefs and wishes, the message was convincing enough that Chris drew a horrifying piece of artwork depicting the act, where Comic Chris apologizes to Sonichu but insists that "destiny called us to make this baby".

Wise also duped Chris into believing he would receive various magical abilities in real life. This apparently emboldened Chris to begin making plans to travel to meet the creator of [[Rosechu's Story]] and to confront [[Cole Smithey]] in New York, possibly with the help of magic powers that he expected to receive. According to the leaker, Wise actually did the responsible thing in these cases and convinced Chris not to go. However, he also told Chris that Neptune would be waiting to meet him at a GameStop; Chris went, specifically, to the Forest Lakes GameStop (from which he [[List of places that have banned Chris|had been banned]]) and waited outside in [[Son-Chu|his car]], honking his horn and peering inside.

==Ideas==
Below is a summary of ideas in Chris's work attributed to the Idea Guy.

===[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]===
Throughout November, Chris made several posts,<ref>[[November 2017 Facebook posts]]</ref> some accompanied by drawings, on being possessed by ''Hyperdimension Neptunia'' goddess Uzume Tennouboshi and an invasion of CWCville by enemy forces from the ''Neptunia'' video games.

Halfway through the month, observers began speculating that a new troll had appeared, as Chris's posts began to include references designed to go over his head. On 14 November, he wrote that [[Silvana]] had been captured by a Russian billionaire and posted a photo of the soldier who would be rescuing her, recognized by spectators as part of the Remove Kebab internet meme. The same day, Chris recorded [[Freestyle Dance With Me, For Our World!]] while wearing a tinfoil hat to prevent "the man" from reading his mind.

===Nazi [[CWCville]]===
[[File:Smashing (720p 30fps H264-192kbit AAC).mp400001.png|thumb|200px|The [[Christine Doll]], shortly before being executed.]]

A day after the "Freestyle Dance", Chris described in detail how Silvana had been saved in a military conflict titled [[Operation BARBarossa]], thinking the name was meant to be a clever nod towards [[Barb|his mother]]. The post was littered with references to World War II, particularly on actions by Nazi Germany, such as "prison camps full of large ovens" built on CWCville soil.

Days later, Chris expanded on the new CWCville lore,<ref>[[November 2017 tweets#Updates on prison camps & reality]]</ref> giving the names of the prison camps. He also warned that CWCville's supply of U.S. money had been tainted with a virus – a concept borrowed from the video game ''Tom Clancy's The Division'' – and encouraged travelers to use "Cwcsmarts" instead – a name slightly reminiscent of Nazi (and Weimar) Germany's "Reichsmark". Later, he mentioned that CWCville's ZIP Code had been changed from its previous Mexican designation to one in Germany.

Two weeks after the BARBarossa post, Chris had noticed speculation that he had fallen in with the Nazi crowd, and took offense to it, insisting that the ideas had come from [[Count Graduon]].

On 26 December, the Idea Guy informed Chris that citizens of CWCville who refused to accept [[SLGBTQ]] formed a homophobic klan and attacked the [[CWCville Shopping Center|CWCville Mall]], and rioted after the trial of [[Jamsta]] for molesting [[Punchy Sonichu]]. In the same message, he mentioned that the [[TrollBusters]] have been reformed into the "CWCstapo", an obvious (though lost on Chris) reference to the [[wikipedia:Gestapo|Gestapo]], the secret police of Nazi Germany, to "be better at stopping criminals".<ref name=jamsta>[[December 2017 Facebook posts#Jamsta molested Punchy]]</ref> The update contains the line "A police state is a Country run by CRIMINALS", a quote from ''Fatherland'', a novel set in an alternate timeline in which Nazi Germany won World War II.

A few weeks later, on 16 January, Chris was told that the [[Christine Doll|MLP doll he had customized to his image]] was, in fact, bugged by Nazis. He took vengeance by [[smashing]] it to pieces on camera. A few days later, Chris destroyed his Christmas tree and a photo of Hulk Hogan in [[Get Out, You D*** Nazis!‎]] for the same reason.

===CWCville elections===
On 26 November, Chris broke his longstanding policy barring elections in CWCville by announcing that the position of mayor was up for election.<ref>[[November 2017 tweets#CWCville mayoral election]]</ref> The mayoral candidates included several notorious historical figures, Russian president Vladimir Putin, actor [[wikipedia:Brendan Fraser|Brendan Fraser]], [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] and ''[[Video games|Payday 2]]'' character [[Bob]] McKendrick. Incumbent [[Allison Amber]] did not run for reelection. Chris himself endorsed McKendrick, due to him sharing a name with his father, with a slogan ripped off from [[Pmurt]]'s "Make America Great Again".

A few days later, Chris announced another election for chief of police.<ref>[[November 2017 tweets#CWCville Chief of Police election]]</ref> The candidates were Ian Brandon Anderson (again), "[[wikipedia:Manuel Noriega|Man-Ewell Noriega]]", and two serial killers.

Brendan Fraser won the mayoral election and took office sometime in December;<ref name=jamsta></ref> Ian Brandon Anderson won the vote for chief of police but Chris has yet to confirm that he has taken office.

===Trans Rosechu===
[[File:Cwc imaginary gal-pal's penis.jpg |thumb|250px]]
A distraught Chris posted to Facebook and Twitter in early December, saying that [[Rosechu]] had informed him that she was actually transgender, and had a penis up until the events of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], at which point she underwent advanced gender-reassignment surgery to become "Fully Woman" and enable her to give birth to her children.<ref>[[December 2017 Facebook posts#Is Rosechu a transwoman?]]</ref>

Chris, agitated about the prospect of altering his canon in such a significant way, put up a poll to ask fans whether Rosechu should stay trans or be retconned back to his original concept of her being female from birth, pointing out that Rosechu being trans would hurt him and that the other option would hurt her. This reaction was seen by spectators as trans-shaming towards Rosechu, who he believes to be real in another dimension. In essence, Chris wants to be accepted as trans, added a [[Robee Sonichu|ten-year-old]] trans-female to his comic, and forced Rosechu and the gang to fully accept and love Chris for coming out – [[Chris and hypocrisy|but refuses to believe Rosechu herself could possibly be trans]].

===Other changes to ''Sonichu'' canon===
[[File:Neo Silvana.jpg|thumb|200px|Neo Silvana]]

With the revelation that the Nazis have taken Cwcville, it is also revealed that pre-tomgirl Chris in the comic was an from an alternate timeline, where he was whisked into the past by the Nazis. Every [[Sonichu_#10|atrocity]] committed by Chris is also revealed to be the actions of Nazi Chris. He was then killed by tomgirl Chris with a swift kick to the testicles.

[[Sonichu 15|''Sonichu'' #15]], a book Chris had wanted to use for a modern retelling of [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]] prior to his known interactions with the Idea Guy, has significant alterations to the canon of the comics. Sonichu's new birthday is given as April 20th, or "4/20" – representing the slang term "[[Tobacky#Cannabis|420]]", but also coinciding with Adolf Hitler's birthday and the anniversary of the Columbine massacre.

Another change in birthday is for [[Magi-chan]], which was changed to 14 November, 1948<ref>https://tweetsave.com/cwcsonichu/status/987472560114806786</ref> - the joke being that this made him [[Sex|69 years old]] - making him the oldest Sonichu in the comic. It is also the same birthdate of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles,_Prince_of_Wales Prince Charles, the current heir apparent to the British throne].

Halfway through December, Chris exclaimed that [[Silvana]] had been lost in the past, but that there was a way to bring her back if his followers would "BELIEVE In Silvana Rosechu, and her Fullest Existence in Cwcville, Virginia, USA, Of All Timelines, Worlds and Dimensions!". She was revived in a new form, with her old one destroyed.<ref name=silvana>[[December 2017 Facebook posts#Silvana lost in the past]]</ref>

Sonichu lore was changed from an unknown number of Sonichu species to an exact number - [[Sex|69]]<ref name=silvana></ref> - which Chris had to retcon [[Sonichu 8]] to fit in.

On 5 January, Chris posted that [[Magi-Chan]] and his mentor, Mewtwo, had gotten married – showing that gay marriage is indeed legal in CWCville.<ref name=gaymarriage>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref> They now live as a "loving [[Chris and English|triage]]" with [[Silvana]].

After Idea Guy was outed and his involvement ceased, Chris resumed uploading pages for [[Sonichu 12-9|''Sonichu'' #12-9]]. In it, jokes and references inserted by Idea Guy survived: [[Night Star]] and [[Jessica Quinn|Diamond Melody]] order a hotdog from a Tesco merchant (Tesco had a scandal involving selling beef with horse meat to customers). Night Star also rambles about her age, giving references to ''Gears of War''.<ref>[[November 2017 Patreon posts]]</ref>

Similarly, in-progress work on [[Sonichu 14]] shows Chris still using Idea Guy's suggestions.

Partial pages of [[Sonichu 16]] were posted by Kiwi Farms users whom Idea Guy had confided in, the plot of which involves his explanation on how he got access to Chris and the nightmarish state of CWCville he had described to him. Chris retained the story after the Idea Guys were ousted, however, his allies suggested that he avoid publishing the issue.

==="Translated" dialogue===
In November and December, Chris drew what he believed to be artwork featuring [[Sailor Moon]] characters conversing with his comic counterpart in foreign languages. However, he was actually tricked into writing "I am carrying a penis", among other things, in Japanese.<ref>[[November 2017 Patreon posts#Chris writes about dicks, thinks it's his signature]]</ref>

A month later, more "translated" art was posted,<ref>[[December 2017 Facebook posts#"Translated" Sailor Moon drawings]]</ref> this one featuring the [[Wikipedia:Meine Ehre heißt Treue|SS motto]] as well as German lines from the video games ''Brothers in Arms'' and ''Wolfenstein: The New Order''. In addition, Chris tried to write the "I am carrying a penis" line again, although he accidentally wrote it with a typo.

The German translations in particular put Chris's [[naïve|naïveté]] on full display, with some of the German dialogue featuring words such as "Zebra", "Evolution" and "Universum", which are similar or identical to English counterparts that are obviously absent in the supposed translations, yet [[Slow-in-the-minds|he was none the wiser]].

Chris's note congratulating Magi-Chan and Mewtwo on tying the knot contains Swedish text giving a shout-out to [[Kiwi Farms]].<ref name=gaymarriage></ref>

===Sonichu genealogy for Chris, Bob and Ted Bundy===
Chris was told that some people are half-Sonichu, such as Chris, his father [[Bob]] and serial killer [[wikipedia:Ted Bundy|Ted Bundy]]. [[Barb]], on the other hand, is full human.

This idea was implanted into Chris prior to Josh Wise being doxed in January 2018; Chris maintained belief in this even after the Idea Guys had been removed from power in May 2018, bringing it up in the [[Count Dankula]] interview in June.

<center><gallery>
File:Bobchu.jpeg|Bob as a Sonichu
File:Bundychu.jpeg|[[wikipedia:Ted Bundy|Ted Bundy]] as a Sonichu
</gallery></center>

===Marrying Chris to Cryzel Rosechu and Magi-Chan===
{{main|Cryzel and Magi-Chan}}
Chris began a polyamorous relationship with fictional characters [[Cryzel Rosechu]] and [[Magi-Chan]] on 26 March 2018. Eventually, Chris declared himself to be bisexual after having had Magi-Chan as a boyfriend.

Strangely, Chris continued to hold onto this delusion even after the Idea Guys were removed from power<ref name=stillbelievingmarriage>[[May 2018 social media posts#On the Cryzel and Magi-Chan relationship and being blackmailed]]</ref>.

===Chris liking flat-chested women===
[[File:Flat-chested women April 2018.jpg|thumb|200px]]

Early in April, Chris posted a drawing commemorating flat-chested women, depicting himself as flat-chested instead of with the usual comically-large breasts.<ref name=aprilposts></ref>

{{clear}}

===Turning Chris bisexual===
[[File:CWC like video of shirtless men.png|thumb|Chris liked a video featuring [[Muscle bra|shirtless men]] in April 2018.]]

On 10 April 2018, Chris came out as [[Chris and sexuality#Bisexuality|bisexual]], saying he had done so after discussion with [[Cryzel and Magi-Chan]]<ref name=aprilposts>[[April 2018 social media posts]]</ref>. Days later, he uploaded a disturbing video, [[Dick Licker; that is I.]], in which he licked an image of Magi-Chan's penis drawn on a wall (and was comfortable enough to mention that he had given oral sex to Magi-Chan to a Twitter ween.<ref name=price></ref>). He also updated his [[Facebook]] to note that he is a bisexual transwoman, "interested in men and women."

===Making Chris into a prostitute===

On 24 April 2018, Chris announced<ref>https://tweetsave.com/cwcsonichu/status/988803950165012480</ref>

{{quotebox|Anyone living locally to me in Virginia, or visiting in Charlottesville, I’ll give y’all BJs for money too. Serious.}}

A Twitter ween DM'd Chris about it. In the conversation, Chris said<ref name=price>[[:File:NAME YOUR PRICE!!.jpeg]]</ref>:

{{quotebox|Consider me a beginner with experience blowing [[Cryzel and Magi-Chan|my loving boyfriend]], willing to learn and adapt further. $50 for that BJ from this celeb; if he wants butt sex, that will be $100. Cash only.}}

Chris told Twitter fan [[CWCProtectSquad|Tings Tingz]] that he was indeed serious about prostituting himself, had several offers, but had not taken on any customers. When asked if he would consider, Chris responded, "a little from Column "A" and the latter from Column "B"."<ref>File:TingsTingz concern for the prostitution message.jpg</ref>

Chris disavowed the prostitution messages on 7 May 2018, saying he had been coerced<ref>https://tweetsave.com/cwcsonichu/status/993693423084318720</ref>. He went further on 25 May, saying he had been forced to write such things, and that the people responsible for it - one from California and another from Kentucky - "know who They Are and their Day is Coming and Rightfully SOON!" <ref name=callingout></ref>

===Other content===
On 7 December, Chris posted a "dark" [[Pokémon]] fan theory, lamenting that Pokémon are kept in suspended animation with "NO Simulated Fields made from Virtual Reality! NO Living Room Apartment Setting! NOTHING! Suspended Animation in Dark".<ref>[[December 2017 Facebook posts#What it's like in a Pokeball]]</ref>

On 11 December, Chris performed a supposed "[[Cherokean Chant]]", which in fact involved mimicking the "squatting Slav" meme and reciting Internet meme quotes from the ''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.'' video game series, all while [[Alcohol|drunk on half a fifth of vodka]].

On 21 April 2018, Chris recorded [[I’m Sorry for Ruining so many Fandoms]].

==Gallery of leaked content==
{{see also|Sonichu 16}}

<center><gallery>
File:CWC gets kicked.jpg |Christine kicks Chris in the nuts.
File:CWC ded.jpg |Chris dies from testicular trauma.
File:CWC vs Hitler.jpg|Hitler is zapped to the extreme.
File:IdeaGuyCwc News Media.PNG|Used to reveal Cwcville's Russian occupation.
File:IdeaGuyCwc News Media3.jpg|Fake news about Count Graduon.
File:NaziDC.jpg|Still of a Nazi occupation
File:Nazi new york.png|A scene from The Man in High Castle used to trick Chris
File:Bobchu.jpeg|Bob as a Sonichu
File:Bundychu.jpeg|[[wikipedia:Ted Bundy|Ted Bundy]] as a Sonichu
File:PerceptorSonichu.jpeg|Perceptor Sonichu, adopted daughter of Magi-chan and Mewtwo
File:ChristineNude.jpeg|Self portrait of Christine in nude, recovered from the "Futanari virus".
File:CWCSonichu Rule34.jpeg|Chris butt-fucking Sonichu in comic form in order to fulfill a prophecy for [[Crystal]]'s birth.
IdeaGuyCWCreligion1.png|Chris discusses religion, abandons Christianity.
IdeaGuyCWCreligion2.png
IdeaGuyCWCreligion3.png
IdeaGuyCWCreligion4.png
IdeaGuyCWCreligion5.png
IdeaGuyCWCreligion6.png
File:IdeaGuyMap.jpeg|A map Idea Guy made
</gallery></center>

===Private messages===

As Ballzymaker94, Idea Guy had contacted several members of Kiwi Farms through private messaging to discuss his trolling efforts. After he was doxed by the site's moderators on 22 January 2018, the users came forward to post the content he had shared with them.

[[File:KF mod on ideaguy.png|thumb|200px|A Kiwi Farms moderator elaborates on why they forced the Idea Guy saga to end.]]

He had not shared all of his content and chat logs over PM, and generally summarized his interactions with Chris. He offered to trade in all of his information in exchange for the moderators removing the dox of his family members, however, they refused the deal on the grounds that they disliked his public trolling output.

One user had a lengthy conversation with him, spanning from 3 December to 18 December 2017, archived in [[Idea Guy Q&A]]. In it, Idea Guy discusses how he had gained Chris’s trust, how Chris reacted to some of his ideas and mentions content which had not been publicly released, such as Chris wanting intel on whether Jessica Quinn was actually a troll, how Chris tried to prevent [[Jamsta]] from being jailed for molestation and Chris’s attempts to interact with Neptunia goddesses.

==Idea Guy, post-doxing==
After Idea Guy was doxed, Chris continued to wear the [[Chris and fashion|Gopnik outfit]] which Idea Guy had him don for the [[Cherokean Chant]] video, which became a staple of his fashion. Chris also modified his [[medallion]] shortly before Idea Guy was doxed, to feature an item from ''Hyperdimension Neptunia'' - this also continued after Idea Guy left and can be seen in [[Our signatures]], a video recorded months later. In April 2018, Chris posted a drawing of him showing support for flat-chested women, with his character wearing both the Gopnik outfit and modified medallion. On 20 April, when asked by a troll, he affirmed that it was indeed Sonichu's birthday, that Magi-chan was born in 1948 (making him the oldest of the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon), and that Sonichu's previous canonical birthday was actually the day "[[Reality Cartoon|he came More into this world]] and in my life".<ref>[[April 2018 social media posts#A birthday "surprise"]]</ref>

In March 2018, a ween brought up the Nazi camps, and Chris responded<ref>[[March 2018 social media posts]]</ref>:

{{quote|That was Graduon’s Idea; NOT Mine.}}

An out-of-character video surfaced in April, [[One-Hundred!]], in which Chris exercises with dumbbells.

On 17 April, the influence over Chris became much more obvious. Chris's Twitter account repeatedly posted slanderous lies about him.<ref name=aprilposts></ref> He then deleted the tweets, claiming a hack had occurred – this is unlikely due to the speed at which he was able to remove the posts. Chris, being [[naïve]], may have been coerced just as he was for the prostitution messages.

===Links between Josh Wise and post-dox Idea Guy===
[[File:Chris Chan Sonichu Cheeki Breeki.jpg|200px|thumb|"Cheeki Breeki" appears a month after Wise had been doxed.]]

*In a tweet on 16 April, Chris inadvertently let slip a clue as to how he was being trolled, the same technique used before the doxing:

{{quotebox|I had not heard much of the Nostalgia Critic yet, but in Cwcville, apparently, Christine and the Hedgehog Boys made a song about him, “The Nostalgia Critic Did Nothing Wrong!” So, some of my family and species likes him. Cool. :) <ref name=aprilposts></ref>}}

* Chris drew [[Kun T’Nyuget]] on 23 January 2018, merely one day after Wise had been doxed, but did not reveal it until months later in May 2018. The character next surfaced as a mention in a set of tweets in April, in connection with an Idea Guy plot on turning Chris bisexual<ref>[[April 2018 social media posts#Chris's Twitter controlled by troll]]</ref>.
* In December 2017, Josh Wise had Chris film [[Cherokean Chant]], which featured him reciting a video game meme, ''Cheeki Breeki'', because Chris believed it to be a chant of Cherokees<ref>[[Idea Guy Q&A]]</ref> The Cheeki Breeki lines surfaced again in a drawing of Chris Chan Sonichu, dated February 2018.
* During May 2018, Chris made many tweets indicating that his association with the Idea Guys had ended. In one tweet, he called them out on a couple of schemes which had taken place in [[April 2018]], and said<ref name=callingout></ref>:

{{quote|The People who Did THAT to me know who They Are and their Day is Coming and Rightfully SOON! I Know you Read This - Don't Get Too Comfortable Jerks in The Bluegrass State or Golden State!}}

Notably, Josh Wise resides in California, aka the Golden State<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/idea-guy-joshua-wise-manipulating-the-intellecutally-disabled-for-fun-megathread.37132/page-65#post-2984638</ref>.

==Still a believer==
{{quote|If you want BAD DIRECTION, you should look up Idea Guy.|Chris, in the middle of restating his belief that he is married to [[Cryzel and Magi-Chan]], an Idea Guy concept<ref>https://tweetsave.com/cwcsonichu/status/1005602044818984960</ref>.}}

After Idea Guy was removed from power in May 2018, Chris still maintained belief in many of the concepts that were embedded into him, despite being aware that Idea Guy is a troll. In the [[Copitz]] interview, filmed a few weeks later, Chris restated that he was bisexual, and in the [[Count Dankula]] interview, filmed in June, Chris reiterated many of the ideas fed to him about CWCville when asked about his beliefs, such as his marriage to Cryzel and Magi-Chan, Bob being part-Sonichu and theories about Ted Bundy. In [[Nightstar is a very important Special Sonichu]], Chris still believes in the joke revision that there are 69 species of Sonichus/Rosechus.

==See also==
*[[Bluespike]]
*[[Chris and reality]]
*[[Molvanîa]]

==References==
<references/>

{{People}}

DoopieDoOver

2018-06-09T13:06:58Z

MindHit: /* Shot down */

{{Honest}}
{{Articleofthenow}}

{{quote|"Is chris chan even real?"|Doopie asking an understandable question in a May 31, 2016 tweet<ref>https://twitter.com/DoopieDoOver/status/737793615259394049</ref>}}

{{quote|Darling|Chris, addressing Doopie. Repeatedly.<ref name=darling>[[July 2017 tweets]], [[July 2017 Patreon posts]]</ref>}}

{{infobox
| title = DoopieDoOver
| image = [[Image:DoopieDoOver.png|250px|center]]
|header1 = Information
|label1 = Name
|data1 = Danielle Pitts<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-07-19-17-doopie-commission.32399/page-2#post-2438376</ref>
|label2 = Also known as
|data2 = DoopieDoOver KittenBell Dani Willow
|label3 = Date of Birth
|data3 = 27 May 1994 (age {{Age|1994|5|27}})
|label4 = Gender
|data4 = Female
|label5 = Nationality
|data5 = [[United States|American]]
|label6 = [[Chris and race|Race]]
|data6 = White
|header7 = Twitter
|data7 = [http://twitter.com/DoopieDoOver @DoopieDoOver]
}}

'''Danielle Pitts''' (nicknamed "'''DoopieDoOver'''" or "'''Doopie'''") is a voice actress/animator for the [[Planet Dolan]] YouTube channels. She also offers drawings for sale. Chris appeared to consider her to be a [[gal pal]], whereas she thought of him as simply another customer. In August 2017, she blocked him after receiving negative attention from weens and getting creeped out by Chris's messages towards her.

== Prologue ==
[[File:Doopie react to cwc.png|thumb]]

Chris discovered the Planet Dolan channel in [[August 2016]] and took a liking to Doopie. He began frequently tweeting to her in 2017. His first message to Doopie was on 7 March 2017 when she tweeted about her Borderline Personality Disorder and how it's affected the way she interacts with others. Chris, [[Autism|having completely missed the point of the entire post]], and [[Mary Lee Walsh|having]] [[Jerkop|judged]] [[Adam Stackhouse|so]] [[Pmurt|many]] [[Michael Snyder|people]] [[Jimmy Hill|in]] [[Trolls|the]] [[Megan Schroeder|past]], [[Chris and kindness|felt somewhat empathetic for Doopie]], and made a misguided attempt to make her feel better by comparing her mental disorder with a bunch of people she's never met on the internet.<ref>[[2017 tweets#Empathizing with BPD]]</ref>

His social awkwardness in full display, he has tweeted to her on the subjects of poop,<ref>[[2017 tweets#Poop]]</ref> his hatred of online dating,<ref>[[May 2017 tweets#Ranting on online dating]]</ref> and he has tried to hit on her by quoting his "I’m Done Adulting" ''My Little Pony'' T-shirt.<ref>[[2017 tweets#Hitting on Doopie]]</ref>

Doopie knew about Chris prior to him becoming obsessed with her. She occasionally made fun of him on Lazycast, a podcast series she co-hosts,<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/08-03-2017-we-can-not-let-ourselves-be-blinded-impulsively.28939/page-5#post-2129294</ref> as recently as March 2017.

Once Chris started actively tweeting to her, starting in the spring of 2017, she started off by ignoring his messages.

On 11 April, she liked one of his tweets sympathizing with her stance against animal cruelty.<ref>[[2017 tweets#Animal cruelty]]</ref> Eventually, on 21 April, she decided to converse with Chris when he asked about her newly dyed hair. A swarm of [[weens]] promptly descended on them, and Doopie found herself in the position of defending Chris.<ref>[[2017 tweets#Doopie defends Chris]]</ref>

In July, she explained her opinion on Chris, mentioning that he had commissioned her for art and pledged to her Patreon.

{{quoteboxred|I've been following the "Chris chan" saga since the beginning. I know everything that (s)he's done. And yeah, it's pretty shitty, but what other people have done to him/her as been pretty shitty too. I'm also just not the type of person to turn someone away when they're being nothing but kind to me. It may be a fake, it may be a show, but I'm not emotionally invested in this enough to really care.

(S)he's paid me to do a commission, and is a patron on my patreon, and as a woman of business, I'm going to treat him/her as every other commissioner and patron.<ref>[[July 2017 tweets#Doopie knows about Chris]]</ref>}}

== Art commissions ==
{{quote|I really had no choice. A paying customer is a paying customer, but I'm starting to regret it lol.|Doopie reacts to the fallout from being Chris's customer on 1 August 2017.<ref>https://twitter.com/DoopieDoOver/status/892484212145627136</ref>}}

Around 22 June 2017, Chris began to pledge on Doopie’s Patreon.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-7-12-chris-argues-with-a-fool.32246/page-6#post-2426664</ref> He pledged at the $50 tier<ref>[[Doopie E-mails]]</ref> and received a sketch of Rosechu as one of the offered rewards.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/7-27-doopies-patreon-sketch-for-chris.32596/</ref>

He also paid her $25 for a separate commission to serve as a profile picture and liked it so much that he switched his profile icon on [[Facebook]], [[YouTube]], [[Twitter]] and [[Patreon]] to it. Ever since Doopie has first shared the picture with Chris, the drawing has been subject to many [[Parody|parodies]] defacing Chris in the picture, either by redrawing him as he actually appears IRL or by replacing Chris with another person such as [[Liquid Chris]].

Chris began throwing that money at her in the midst of the [[Financhu Crisis]], and he quickly resorted to begging people on Facebook for the exact amount of money, claiming that he needed it to help him and his mother.<ref>[[July 2017 tweets#Resuming begging]]</ref>

<center><gallery>
Image:Doopiedrawing.jpg|$25 commission
File:DoopieDrawing2.jpg
File:Christine C.png|Reward for $50 Patreon pledge
</gallery></center>

=== Porn ===

[[File: PornRequest.png|thumb|The request in question]]

On 1 August 2017, Chris began pledging to KittenBell - a Patreon account set up by Doopie to handle porn requests, while continuing his pledge to her primary account. He suggested a drawing of two [[My Little Pony]] characters depicted as lesbians "makin' out and fondling/fingering".<ref>[[August 2017 Patreon posts#Request for cartoon porn]]</ref> Predictably, Doopie never worked on the project in question.

=="Darling"==
{{main|Darling}}

[[File:Fanartdoopiereact.jpg|thumb|Artist's depiction of Doopie's reaction.]]

After becoming Doopie's customer, Chris began to refer to her as "darling" multiple times over Twitter and once on Doopie's Patreon.<ref name=darling/> He does it in spite of knowing that Doopie is not a [[boyfriend-free girl]], which he learned on 16 May through a Planet Dolan video in which she talked about the success she had at online dating.<ref>[[May 2017 tweets#Ranting on online dating]]</ref>

Opinion is divided on why Chris does this. Some think he believes Doopie is an attainable target for his [[love quest]], while others think that he is [[naive]] to how creepy he sounds and thinks "darling" is appropriate for a [[tomgirl]] to say in conversation. Chris has similarly used "dear" to address his mother,<ref>[[Live Game Stream - C-Log 050012017-1]]</ref> seemingly oblivious to the incestuous implications. Given that Chris has had sex dreams about his mother,<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Incestuous Thoughts]]</ref> it might not bode well for his view of Doopie.

{{clear}}

==Shot down==

{{quote|You don't know me, christine.|Doopie sets the record straight.<ref>[[August 2017 tweets#Doopie sets the record straight]]</ref>}}

{{quote|Yes. I don't totally know you, but you are a good person; like all I've listed here, y'all are girls and at least acquaintances up to friends. And that, to me, counts as much, because I am thankful to have you all in my life and communication circle. 😊🌸 Also, another V.I.Detail., I Care. And I wear my heart on my sleeve. ❤️🤳🏻
|Chris' response.}}

On 1 August, 2017, Chris tagged Doopie in celebration of National Girlfriend Day, listing her among all of the gal-pals he's met on the internet and real life. The day is an occasion meant for female friends to celebrate their special bond.<ref>https://nationaldaycalendar.com/national-girlfriends-day-august-1/</ref> Chris—in his typical, completely non-extrospective, fashion—failed to realize how sad and creepy it was to include Doopie, someone he knew only online via a client-artist relationship. If that wasn't inappropriate enough, Chris's subsequent tweets further unveiled an attraction toward Doopie—which appeared much stronger than previously expected. Doopie immediately protested, stating the obvious fact that she was a stranger to Chris. Despite this clear and unambiguous response, Chris happily disregarded it. Only partially agreeing with her, Chris went on to imply that he must have known her a little bit because he knew she was a good person. Chris then expressed his appreciation for her being in his circle of friends (again, ignoring her previous declaration to the contrary). Once again, Chris demonstrates his almost complete lack of social awareness.

However, despite his implied romantic attraction towards her, Doopie, having already known who Chris is, took it surprisingly well and only seemed to mention his heart on his sleeve in her next reply. Showing disgust towards Chris' skewed ideas of empathy, she began to scold Chris on his donation of his own money he could have used to support himself and Barb during the [[Financhu Crisis]]. She allowed Chris to claim a refund of his Patreon pledges, which he initially declined.

== #HarassCWCdirectly and #DontHarassMe ==

{{main|HarassCWCdirectly}}

[[File:Doopie -DontHarassMe.jpg|thumb]]

After everything was said and done, and the weens had taken their naps, Chris unpromptedly uploaded a [[Captain's Log]], ordering all the [[trolls]] to [[BACK THE FUCK OFF]]. He shifted all the blame to the weens, believing they were the reason Doopie blatantly rejected him. Chris attempted to begin two hashtag campaigns, #HarassCWCdirectly and #DontHarassMe, pledging to protect the entire cast of Planet Dolan. He did this by encouraging the trolls to attack him instead. It's likely Chris did this simply to appear heroic to Doopie and to win over her heart again—despite that she never displayed any affection for him to begin with.

{{clear}}

== Kiwi Farms ==

{{main|Doopie E-mails|Doopie Q&A}}

[[File:DoopieKiwiFarms.png|thumb]]

By 3 August, Chris' contact with Doopie had been severely reduced, due to her blocking him on Patreon and Twitter. When probed by a troll on 5 August, Chris gave this reply, suggesting that their relationship was not over yet:

{{quotebox|Doopie and I are not close yet, but that does not mean she is not my friend; "Not Your Friend" were Not her exact words, Troll.<ref>[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/893880561663700992 Chris and Doopie, 5 August]</ref>}}

He also discussed the matter on Patreon:

{{quotebox|And you think I did Not know all that already? I've Learned from my past errors and mistakes. I do not violate women's space. Doopie is going through her recovery of the recent Harassment from You Trolls and Bullies. She liked my Kindness, and I am aware of her past making fun of me; I do not hold that against her. You Damn Trolls and Bullies Ruin Nearly Everything.<ref>[[August 2017 Patreon posts#Third Eye Heart Icon]]</ref>}}

Since Chris failed to get the obvious, Doopie temporarily unblocked him on 5 August to spell out that she is not his friend:

{{quoteboxred|I can't believe I had to unblock you to tell you this. I'm not your friend. I'm not ever interested in being your friend. Leave me alone. You were specifically a customer to me, and you took it too far. You creeped me out. Now please don't talk to, or about me, ever again.<ref>https://twitter.com/DoopieDoOver/status/894003364135976961</ref><ref>https://twitter.com/DoopieDoOver/status/894003570797826049</ref>}}

Later, fed up with Chris's constant unwanted praise and affection, Doopie decided to leak all of the private e-mails Chris has sent to her by making an account on the [[Kiwi Farms]]. The users on the site then began to ask her questions regarding her interactions with Chris, to which Doopie responded with some intriguing answers.

{{clear}}

==NightStar2891==
{{main|NightStar2891}}
{{quote|Shut Up, Trolls; I know Doopie is temporarily on your side for now.|Chris, 7 August, ''still'' not getting it.<ref>[[August 2017 tweets]]</ref>}}

[[File:BubbleGummy.jpg|thumb|left|200px|''"An apology piece for you, dear."'' Doopie as a pony, by Chris.]]

On 4 August, in response to Doopie blocking him over Twitter and asking him not to tweet about her again, Chris created a sockpuppet account to both follow Doopie and publicly defend his actions. On 7 August, Chris "allowed" his NightStar account to leak direct messages, held with his main CWCSonichu twitter account, in which he explained in further detail his motives and actions regarding Doopie, to a troll who then posted the messages to Kiwi Farms. It's possible that Chris did this in order for Doopie to see his side of the story, since he was aware she had joined the forum.

On 15 August, following Chris' attendance of [[BronyCon|BronyCon 2017]], an optimistic Chris sent an "apology piece" artwork to Doopie via the sockpuppet. The artwork contained Doopie as a My Little Pony character named Bubble Gummy. Still reeling from recent events, Doopie scorned Chris' advances, and proceeded to block his second account:

{{quoteboxred|I told you to leave me alone. It's not the trolls' fault. This is my personal decision. I'm not interested in being friends with you. Stop. Also, making a second account is even worse. Just move on.<ref>https://twitter.com/DoopieDoOver/status/897646377383018496</ref><ref>https://twitter.com/DoopieDoOver/status/897648447259648001</ref>}}

{{clear}}

==#BlockTheTrolls==

{{main|BlockTheTrolls}}

==LazyCast and Jessica Quinn==

On 3 September 2017, Chris began following LazyCast, a podcast which has Doopie and her boyfriend as members, on Patreon. He complimented the group, saying:<ref>[[September 2017 Patreon posts]]</ref>
{{quotebox|I'm listening to y'all on LazyCast; y'all are crazy-funny. 😊🌸}}

On 13 September, Chris tweeted to a reply to Doopie by VimHomeless, attaching an image with text likely written by [[Jessica Quinn]]:
{{quotebox|There was nothing serious going on between Christine and Doopie. She's upset that people blew things out of proportion and assisted in ruining nothing more than a relationship with a [[Chris and art|fellow artist]] that she would realistically never meet in real life. She [[darling|isn't hung up on]] someone she's never met.}}

On 26 September, Chris temporarily broke up with Quinn for ambiguous reasons involving "lying"; after they got back together, he posted about how LazyCast #10 would be the last he watched of them.

{{quotebox|With due respect, this one was the last @LazyCastPodcast I’ll hear; cutting my ties. I’m sorry for unsubscribing.}}

The breakup occurred after Chris posted screencaps of several of Doopie's tweets, taken while he was using [[TwiSparLicious|a sockpuppet account]]. These screencaps were accompanied by comments such as:<ref>[[:File:TwiSparLicious likes.png]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Just saying, she's growing up mentally and emotionally [[Chris and reality|like I did]]. 🌸}}

This has demonstrated that he remains infatuated with Doopie, and the breakup with Quinn likely happened as a result of his dishonesty to her regarding stalking Doopie on Twitter.

<center><gallery>
File:TwiSparLicious likes.png|Chris takes screenshots of Doopie's tweets using his sockpuppet account.
File:Chris-lazycastpodcast.png|Chris's announcement regarding LazyCast.
</gallery></center>

On 6 October 2017, following a breakup with Quinn, Chris read a [[Kiwi Farms]] thread about it. Notably, he rated several of Doopie's forum posts there in the only ratings he had given on the forum at that point.<ref>http://archive.is/TVUcN</ref> Afterwards, he began watching Doopie on YouTube again, and following her on [[Tumblr]].

<center><gallery>
File:Chris rating doopie's posts.png|Rating Doopie's forum posts. Note the "Optimistic" rating.
File:Back to watching Doopie1.png|Chris liking a Lazycast show...
File:Back to watching Doopie2.png|...and a video on Doopie's channel.
File:Following Doopie on tumblr.png|Following her on Tumblr.
</gallery></center>

{{clear}}

== In the comic ==
[[File:Doopie on Sonichu 13 cover.jpg|thumb|200px|First artwork of Doopie (brunette to the right of Chris, drawn after Doopie changed her hair color).]]
She has appeared in Chris' upcoming [[Sonichu 13|Sonichu and Planet Dolan crossover comic]] on its cover, standing near Chris. The page was released on 29 May 2017, prior to Doopie blocking him from social media. The fate of the comic, and Doopie's place in it, remains unclear.

{{clear}}

==Fan art==
{{collapsible
|Some are NSFW.|
<center><gallery>

Image:DoopieCameForCWC.jpg
File:Shecameforcwc2017.jpg|KittenBellCameForCWC
Image:DoopieAndCWC.jpg
Image:DoopieDrawingParody.jpg
Image:DoopieDrawingParody2.jpg
Image:DoopieDrawingParody3.png

</gallery></center>}}

==Fan video==
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = #HarassCWCdirectly
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8oCd-Y8g8Es}}
| Stardate = 6 August 2017
| Maker = Spelling Bee
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}

==See also==
*[[Chris and socialization]]
*[[LadyOfTheCosmo]]
*[[Megan Schroeder]]
*[[Planet Dolan]]

==External links==

*[https://www.youtube.com/user/DoopieDoOver YouTube channel]
*[https://www.patreon.com/DoopieDoOver DoopieDoOver's Patreon account] - Chris ''was'' a patron of this account.
*[https://www.patreon.com/KittenBell NSFW Patreon account] - And this one, too.

== Sources ==
<references />

{{Sweethearts}}
{{People}}

[[Category: Gal pals]]

Chris and money

2017-07-08T12:51:10Z

MindHit:

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[File:Cwcshutup.png|thumb|Chris's response to literally any commercial.]]
{{quote|He's not good at math when it comes to managing money.|[[Bob Chandler]], understating it.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>}}

Chris has repeatedly shown though his actions and words that he has no idea how to handle '''money''' or manage his own finances. Between his impulse spending, [[Chris and his Ego|his greed and selfishness]], his unwillingness to save even the smallest amount of money, and his massive sense of entitlement, Chris manages to demonstrate complete incompetence and ineptitude in managing financial affairs. Chris has repeatedly amassed debt on credit cards, only to have his enabling parents bail him out multiple times. [[Monthly tugboat|Too lazy to work]], he refuses to make or follow any type of budget or financial plan, instead spending far beyond his means, and expecting others<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Piss_and_burn_fb.PNG</ref> to pay off his accumulated debt for him. It is clear that [[Autism|Chris has no idea what financial responsibility is]] and that his enabling, delusional parents taught him nothing about how to handle finances while he was growing up. Irresponsible, careless, and thoughtless, Chris fails at just about every aspect of financial management that can be thought of.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed!==
For the vast majority of Chris's "adult" life, his only source of income has been the "[[tugboat]]" that he receives from the U.S. federal government every month. In 2009, the payout was $809 a month, placing his annual income at $9,708. After Bob's death, Chris was given a survivor's benefit - increasing the amount to $1,300 per month and making his annual income $15,600. Barb's income, from Social Security and a pension, is around $1,200 per month<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-24-14-leaked-text-may-we-borrow-your-house.6140/page-2#post-416099</ref>.

Chris's parents originally took $450 to pay for room and board;<ref name="Miyamoto" /> this payment was later increased to $565, and then to $580, after Bob paid off Chris's enormous credit card debt.<ref>[[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009#8 December]]</ref><ref>[[Jackie Chat 8]]</ref> How much he gets to keep these days isn't known.

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. Yet with my impuslive [sic] shoppiness [sic] (mostly controable [sic]), I end up spending my side-money after I get it.|Chris, [[Chris and His Ego|completely deluded and taking pride in being a lazy bastard]].<ref name="Miyamoto">[[Miyamoto Saga]]</ref>}}

===Chris and impulse spending===
It's obvious that Chris has no grasp on the real value of money, since he actively wastes as much of his monthly tugboat as possible on things like [[The Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[List of Chris's video games|video games]], [[alcohol]], [[Kaka Makeup Basics|make-up]], [[Lego|toys]], [[Mia Hamm|prostitutes]], and weekly lottery tickets<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 12]]</ref>.

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer.<ref name="Miyamoto" /> His [[PlayStation Network]] account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' single [[PlayStation 3]] game that he's ever purchased, and even for ''games he doesn't own'', and he also further promoted his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Sony fanboyism]] by later buying a Sony LCD HDTV for his bedroom which likely costs about $1,000-$1,500. All the while, Chris bought his [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] at second-hand discount thrift stores. Usually, children are taught the value of money at a very young age--not in Chris's case, apparently.

In September [[2013]], Chris complained about he and his mom going through "emotionally depressing, and Financial Downfall to the depths of Greatly Poor and Just Getting By",<ref>[[Facebook]]</ref> making it clear that the family income had dipped since Bob's passing. However, these supposedly lean times were apparently not enough to motivate Chris to get a job, or even to stop buying games, as evidenced by him racking up over $1,000 in game purchases on ''The Simpsons: Tapped Out''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chriss-spending-on-iphone-games.2035/</ref>.

Throughout the summer of 2014, Chris continued to spend thousands of dollars on [[Lego]] and other frivolities, all while whining and complaining on Facebook about his and his mother's poor finances. Chris financed this spending primarily with money from selling custom arts and crafts on his eBay account. Offering free shipping to customers, Chris would receive money from customers, and then pay for shipping out of his own pocket. However, Chris would immediately spend money as soon as it was deposited into his account, often leaving him unable to ship products to customers who had already paid him because of his own financial irresponsibility and negligence.

When several of Chris's eBay customers filed complaints against him because Chris failed to ship a order as promised and obligated, Chris responded by harassing and trolling the customers, posting their personal information in a public post on his Facebook account. In light of this, Chris's future money making prospects from eBay are dim, as most prospective future customers probably wouldn't want to risk being harassed or scammed by Chris.

All the while, even as Chris's credit card debt continued to spiral out of control, Chris continued to buy thousands of dollars of video games, Lego, and other frivolities. As if this were not bad enough, just days after putting his and Barb's cars up for sale, (at exorbitant prices) Chris went out and bought a 2010 Ford Focus, stating on Facebook that he had been approved for a loan, probably at a high interest rate. He also stated that paying for insurance on his new car was "killing" him, implying that either the insurance payment was costly, that he was having trouble paying it, or both.

In January 2015, it was [[CWCki Forums|leaked]] that Chris had spent an absurd amount of money on Nintendo consoles and games, racking up '''585''' transactions'' in the last 4.5 years<reF>http://kiwifarms.net/threads/2015-jan-12-nintendo-employee-details-chriss-recent-video-game-purchases.7050/</ref>, a list which includes useless shovelware, hoards of 1st party Nintendo software, Virtual Console games and [[Sonic Boom Protests|both versions of a game he doesn't even like]]. 276 of these purchases are known to be handheld games, 8 are known to be video game consoles (buying '''4''' DSs and DSis), and 75 which are known to be console games. The grand total cost of all Chris's '''listed''' purchases is '''$7460.43''' or '''$1657.87/year'''. Keep in mind 39% of purchases Chris has on his account are not yet specified, meaning that their cost is not included in this already insanely high number. This information comes on the heels of Chris begging people for money to fix his mother's cavities, as well as the financial worries that his trials will undoubtedly cause.

In [[July 2016]], a field agent provided the following account of Chris, in a situation where he did not have enough cash to pay for his junk food at a gas station<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-thoughts-questions.661/page-601#post-1615438</ref>:

{{quotebox|My friend walks into a gas station/convenience store on the northern edge of Charlottesville.
Chris is trying to buy $7 or so of junk food type stuff, but he only has $5 in cash.
The cashier tries to make understand he owes $2 more. Chris seems to understand, but is slow to process what to do about it.
My friend who is second in line, picks out two ones, says "here you go" and puts them on the counter.
Chris, it seems more out of stupidity and confusion than malice, picks up the $2 and his purchases and makes to leave.
My friend and the cashier, both object and yell that he has to leave the $2 with the cashier.
Chris doesn't seem to react.
A dude who was behind both of them in line is between Chris and the door. As Chris passes him, he taps him to get his attention, and says something like "Hey buddy ..."
Chris makes a get-away-from-me hand wavy gesture without looking at any of the three of them, and fairly loudly says "It's Miss!" and hurries out the door.
Chris continues to his car in a half run, half walk, as all three of the people in the store watch confused and amused.
Chris pulls out of the parking spot, but for some reason heads towards the back of the lot, where there is no exit.
As Chris gets to the back of the lot, he stops, backs up a few feet, tries to turn the car around, doesn't make it, backs up again, and finally gets around. Essentially making a 5 point turn in a fairly large empty parking lot.
Chris drives past the store again not looking inside, and finally drives off.}}

One dreads to imagine how his financial incompetence will affect him once Barb is dead - knowing Chris, and while it is quite tragic, he'll probably continue in his destructive spending patterns until he loses everything he has, and even then, he'll [[Ego|learn nothing]].

===Chris's parental enabling===
Bob encouraged his son to remain unemployed, since he believed that Chris would earn more money from his monthly tugboat than he would have from getting a job. However, this assumption was and is inaccurate. Minimum wage in the state of [[Virginia]] is $7.25 an hour. If Chris were to somehow do a complete 180° on his life and begin working a full 40-hour week, his monthly payment before taxes and payment for room and board would be about $1,260: that's $15,100 annually. Subtracting the money he pays his mom every month to live, as well as the 5% tax his income range mandates in the state of Virginia, Chris could very likely be left with a ridiculous $8,000, which knowing Chris, would be spent on yet more frivolities. Contrast this with the $2,748 Chris pulled in annually from the government after paying off his parents, and it becomes clear that Bob's encouragement came from either thinking Chris would lose his social security if employed (which he wouldn't) or the more accurate notion that his son is a useless failure.

A very likely explanation for Chris's reckless spending is that his parents are at fault (to a degree at least). In addition to coddling him throughout his entire life, they managed to make sure that [[Chris and remorse|Chris has never felt the repercussions for his exorbitant spending (or for anything else)]] by taking over paying Chris's credit card debt, regularly giving him about "$6 a day for small things", buying him [[List of restaurants|fast food]] on a daily basis, and continuing to let himself blow all his money on frivolities and useless stuff, as opposed to essentials like [[Chris and health#Chris and hygiene|hygiene products]], [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|courses that could eventually help him onto the employment ladder]] or [[Clown shirt|clothing that isn't unbelievably tacky]]. Whenever Chris manages to [[The GAMe PLACe|get himself into trouble]], he knows that [[Barb]] will come [[Matthew Noble call|running to his aid and defend him]] and dig him out of whatever mess he's managed to get himself into, even if it is clear that he [[Target|is in the wrong]]. This enabling is the most likely explanation (in addition to his [[autism|poor impulse control]]) for why Chris spends himself into debt as much as he does.

===Fan funding===
{{see also|Chris and business}}
Chris has gotten over $4,000 from his audience over the years, in the form of donations and considerations. He has received thousands more in sales through storefronts such as [[eBay]] and [[Etsy]].

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Amount
! From
! Date received
! Details
|-
|A laptop computer
|A ween in N.C.
|[[August 2011]]
|Chris spoke about it in [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]. A common theory is that the laptop had been infected with a keylogger, but Chris outsmarted the ween by upgrading the computer.
|-
|$500
|[[Kiwi Farms]]
|[[January 2014]]
|Donated by fans after the house fire<ref>[[Destruction Of Chris's House#Aftermath and reaction]]</ref>.
|-
|$150
|Fans
|[[September 2014]]
|From a Kickstarter campaign in which Chris explicitly stated he would use it to buy Legos<ref>[[Kickstarter]]</ref>.
|-
|$1,000
|[[DStecks]]
|[[September 2015]]
|
|-
|$500
|Kiwi Farms user [[Weening|Sonic Rainboom]]
|[[September 2015]]
|Sent Chris a Visa card with $500<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-finds-a-gift-card-spends-it.13723/</ref>. Later admitted doing it to get "interesting content" from him, who has never acknowledged the anonymous gift<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-finds-a-gift-card-spends-it.13723/page-11#post-1054932</ref>.
<center><gallery>
File:Sonic rainboom $500 1.png|Rainboom spent $500 to find that Chris likes McDonalds.
File:Sonic rainboom $500 2.jpg
File:Sonic rainboom $500 3.jpg
</gallery></center>
|-
|Hundreds
|Mostly [[weens]]
|Summer 2016
|During the [[Financhu Crisis]], a pattern formed of Chris begging for money, then briefly stating that he had received donations before begging for more money.
|-
|$1,550
|Selling [[Relics of Fail]]
|August 2016 onwards
|[[Megatron pistol]] ($50), [[Sonic Totem]] ($1,500)
|-
|<s>$116</s>, <s>$70</s>, $24
|[[Patreon]]
|December 2016 onwards
|Chris currently has <s>6</s>, 4 patrons sending him free money every month.
|}

===Chris's beliefs===
Chris believes that by receiving and spending his tugboat on useless junk, he is aiding the economy and paying for other people's tugboats.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever]]</ref> This is a [[Honor roll|damningly moronic conviction]], since sales tax goes to the state government and these "tugboats" are paid with ''federal'' payroll tax. Where Chris is hiding the printing press to afford this discretionary spending is unknown.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle money, Chris has an unhealthy [[Chris and his Ego|fixation]] on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff, and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond. His mother has served as a bad influence in both regards, as she would frequently shop at Goodwill and compulsively hoard the purchases, which both wasted money and helped turn their house into a [[Destruction Of Chris's House|fire hazard]].

===After the house fire===
On [[10 January 2014]], 14 Branchland Court caught fire. This would undoubtedly place the Chandlers in grim circumstances, due to the costs of rebuilding the home and replacing what was lost. Some of his fans pooled their funds to send him a care package, with a money order for $500<ref>[[Destruction Of Chris's House#Aftermath and reaction]]</ref>.

Many, concerned about Chris due to his wasteful spending habits, hoped that this would be the moment in Chris's life where he finally woke up and realized the importance of saving when things like this happen. Unfortunately, not even ''that'' has broken Chris's thick skull--throughout 2014, he wasted '''$5,000''' on ''Lego sets''<ref>[[Lego#Addiction and Financial Ruin]]</ref><ref>[[May 2014 Facebook Posts]]</ref>.

==Barb's toxic influence==
According to a troll with insider info, Chris was able to manage his own finances to a rudimentary degree, even after Bob passed away<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/giving-chris-money-debate-thread.22420/page-15#post-1844194</ref>, although he still has an issue with not saving money for [[Destruction Of Chris's House|potential emergencies]].

The troll also asserted that Chris's financial hardships are caused, in most part, by [[Barb]] helping herself to Chris's monetary accounts in order to attempt paying her out-of-control debts<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/giving-chris-money-debate-thread.22420/page-15#post-1844194</ref>.

{{quotebox|Barb is the one who has serious debt. She fucks up Chris' budgeting by erratically taking money from Chris' account when she needs it, generally without warning.

There are two types of Chris begging videos. One is when Chris wants a bit extra for some legos. You can identify those videos by how vague Chris' requests are, and how relaxed Chris is in the video. Chris isn't in meltdown mode in those videos.

Now, the other type of video is when Barb tried to snatch some money from Chris and Chris doesn't have anything for her. You can identify those videos by how freaked out Chris looks. He's visibly distressed and he's citing specific bills he's got to pay, usually things that seem un-Chris-like. That's when Barb is freaking out at him for not having enough money to pay her debts.

The thing is, the perception is that Chris is bad with money. He's not bad with money (as far as monthly budgeting goes). Despite how foggy Chris' head is, he's got enough memory to recognize patterns in bills over the course of a few months. He knows he's gotta pay electricity bills and rent and things like that. And he does do the math each month about what bills he's got to pay, and how much that leaves him for legos and food. You can't trust his begging. He begs because he wants more money, not because he's in any financial straits (that is, not including Barb).

He lives cheaply as shit. He saves money by buying dollar store shit. He's the type of person to buy single ply toilet paper at the dollar store. But sometimes he'll splurge and treat himself to things, like alcohol. He does this all while meeting his obligations, like his minimum payments and his bills.}}

Information from Cousin Al<ref>[[Catherine#The bowling outing]]</ref> revealed that Chris and Barb '''had''' an inheritance from Bob worth "tens of thousands of dollars." However, Barb spent all of it on hiring Rob Bell to defend herself (...and Chris) from legal charges incurred after [[28 October 2011|the two of them hit Michael Snyder with a car]].

In November 2014, Chris revealed to Renee that Barb was borrowing money from his life insurance<ref>[[Open Relationship E-mails#Barb is borrowing from Chris's life insurance]]</ref>.

===Bank lawsuits against Barb===
In 2016, two banks, Discovery and Capital One, sued Barb for not paying '''over $20,000 total''' in debts, leaving the Chandlers ''even further'' in financial turmoil.

Barb herself appeared in multiple videos in 2016-17, trying to scam people into donating to her.

*[[Donations Required, Serious. Please help]]
*[[Donations Requested, Please]]
*[[Donations Further Requested, Please]]
*[[EMERGENCY HOME UPDATE]]

In the first two videos, Barb claimed not to have enough money for asthma medication, and in the third, she claimed to need money for dental work.

If Barb actually needed money for an emergency, she could simply have instructed Chris to sell some of their possessions. In the videos, Chris's toys and Barb's hoard are clearly visible behind them.

==Chris and credit cards==
That Chris has managed to acquire several credit cards is very surprising, but the foolishness with which he uses them wouldn't surprise anybody at all. As of [[February 2009]], Chris had managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (at the time of [[Mumble 4]], $1,000 of that sum came from the [[PSN]] store, but his bill for PSN downloads increased by the day) and had even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his own were maxed out. According to an [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|e-mail Chris sent to Vivian Gee]], by [[January 2010]] his debt was around $3,500 and had apparently been higher at some point in the intervening time.

By that point, Chris's debt had gotten so out of hand that Bob was forced to step in, making Chris reduce and manage on his spending, and forcing Chris to make regular payments to pay off his outstanding debt. Chris, thoughtless and uninterested in the fact that unpaid credit card debt accrues severe interest, had historically made payments in the smallest installments possible.

Chris provided some more details about this situation in his [[Jackie E-mails 6|e-mails to Jackie]] from [[July 2010]]. At some point, Bob paid off Chris's credit card debt and took payment in installments out of the tugboat in compensation. This foolish act of parental financial enabling allowed Chris to avoid the immediate consequences of his gross financial irresponsibility, and resulted in Chris learning nothing about how to manage his own finances, reinforcing Chris's attitude that he should be able to do anything that he wants and not suffer any negative consequences.

===Best Buy MasterCard===
Not surprisingly, it only took Chris a few short months to land himself in more financial trouble. In the [[Matthew Noble call]], Bob himself revealed that Chris had not only acquired a MasterCard charge account through [[Best Buy]], but as of the second week of [[August 2010]], Chris had predictably used it to land himself in yet more debt and had been laden with fees for bouncing a card payment.

One of Chris's [[Jackie E-mails 7|e-mails to Jackie]] reveals that Chris acquired the Best Buy charge card without his parents' permission; he only told them about it after receiving 2 bounced check fees that showed up on his bank statement, which his father was actively monitoring. In true Chris fashion, he tried to repay the minimum balance each month. When he was forced to reveal the debt to his parents, Bob was obviously less than thrilled. He promptly took control of Chris's bank account as well as his credit cards. From that point until Bob's death, he received only an allowance in the form of Visa gift cards, leaving him unable to accrue any more debt for a short time. At the time, the prospect of not being able to blow his welfare on frivolities [[Jackie E-mails 8|stressed him out]].

Curiously, even in his private communications with Jackie, Chris claimed that the overdraft fees that gave away the existence of the card to Bob were the work of trolls. Elsewhere in their conversations, however, he recounts other instances of "getting carried away" and accidentally overdrawing his bank account, suggesting that he was just using the trolls as a handy scapegoat for his own mistakes.

Bob, delusional and in the throes of some sort of conspiracy paranoia involving the staff and patrons of The GAMe PLACe, claimed that it was most likely [[Michael Snyder]] who had hacked Chris's credit card and checking accounts, though why someone who's been on a manager's salary for several years would bother stealing from any of the near-destitute Chandlers is unknown.

It's unknown why ''any'' financial institution would give Chris a line of credit at this point. Bob probably salvaged Chris's credit rating when he paid off all his prior card debt at once, but he angrily claimed Chris ruined it with the Best Buy debt (certainly true), and, in disturbingly Chris-like fashion, seemed to use this damning information to try to make Chris's latest brush with the [[Chris and the Law|law]] seem "petty" in comparison.

===Credit card debt===
Unverified information on Chris's credit card debt was leaked on the CWCki Forums on 4 June 2014. It was revealed that Chris had at least five active credit cards, with at least $7600 in combined credit limit. Of the five known active cards, at least four were revealed to be maxed out, with at least $7400 in unpaid debt between the five cards. It was estimated that the minimum payment on Chris's known debt was at least $220 a month, and it was revealed that the only reason that Chris had been able to obtain the credit that he had was that, historically, he had almost always at least paid the minimum payment each month, although it was implied that he rarely if ever paid more than the minimum.<ref>[http://cwckiforums.com/threads/chris-and-his-finances-an-in-depth-review-of-his-debt.3809/ CWCki Forums: "Chris and his finances: An in-depth review of his debt"] ([https://archive.today/K6R2c archived version])</ref>

===Payday Loan===
In early 2016, [[CatKnight Interview|Arthur Spatchcock]] discovered that Chris had taken out a Payday loan for $3,000<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/page-13#post-1392146</ref>.

{{quotebox|Chris 'borrowed' three thousand dollars. What he did with it is hazy, sure, but how do you think he bought all those lego sets for Lego Dimensions? }}

A payday loan charges extremely high interest rates, which does not bode well for Chris, due to his habit of only paying back minimal amounts at a time.

===Credit Increase===
In [[June 2016]], Chris's credit card company raised his credit limit. Chris reacted to this news by blowing his "bonus" on [[Transformers]] only to later beg for money over [[Facebook]] while blaming his [[Barb|mother's]] bill payments for their financial woes.
<center><gallery>
File:Transformers fb post1.jpg|Chris bragging about using his credit increase to buy Transformers
File:Transformers fb post2.jpg|''Nine minutes later'', Chris blamed his family's financial shortfalls on his mother's bill payments
</gallery></center>

==Money-Making Schemes==
===Wheeling and Dealing===
Also known as [[Wikipedia:Return fraud|return fraud]]. Chris has a habit of buying a product from one store for a lower cost, then exchanging it for a higher amount of store credit at another store<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 15]]</ref>.

===Lottery===
Chris considers the lottery to be ''an investment''. In September 2010, he told Jackie the following<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 12]]</ref>:

{{quotebox|I invest $4 weekly between Win For Life and Mega Millions; two plays each.}}

===Craigslist===
{{main|Craigslist}}
In late [[October 2011]], Chris posted a Craigslist ad for a 12-year old 32" CRT television and expected a non-negotiable $250 for it;<ref>[[Craigslist#Television]]</ref> in reality, this is about the price of a new flatscreen HDTV of that size, and he would be lucky to get a tenth of his asking price.

Chris placed two cars for sale on Craigslist in September 2014. One was a dilapidated, rusty 1997 Cadillac with a cracked engine block that hadn't run in over a year. Despite having a market value (as scrap) of approximately $150, Chris demanded $5,000 for the automobile, insisting that the cracked engine block made the car a great [[Chris and reality|"fixer upper."]] Chris also placed his mother's BMW Z3 for sale, demanding $15,000 for a car that had a book value of approximately $3,000.

===Pawn shops===
{{main|List of Chris's video games#Chris (barely) lets go}}

Chris occasionally visits pawn shops or similar businesses, among them Snooky's Pawn Shop, GameStop and Plan 9 Music, to sell his old toys so that he can afford new toys.

===Ebay===
{{main|eBay}}
Chris has long used Ebay to sell bits of his toy hoard. He doesn’t put much effort into researching prices, and he often lists items at vastly inflated prices. In August 2016, he listed a used VHS of ''Aladdin'' with a 'Buy it Now' price of $3,000. There were no (legitimate) takers, probably because one can buy the same edition on Amazon for ''one penny'' (plus shipping, but still).

===Cwcville Shopping===
{{main|Chris and business}}
From 2014-2016, Chris sold custom arts and crafts, finally monetizing Sonichu, through [[eBay]], [[Etsy]] and [[Lulu]], before losing his business due to [[PS4|stress]].

===Kickstarter===
{{main|Kickstarter}}
On 23 September 2014, Chris opened a Kickstarter project, asking for $5,000 worth of Legos. At the end of the campaign, Chris raised $150 from 27 backers.

===Wish lists===
'''2015'''

On 13 [[December 2015]], Chris [[December 2015 Facebook Posts#GIMME GIFTS|posted]] an Amazon.com wish list. It was filled with over a thousand dollars worth of PS4 consoles, Lego sets and Skylanders toys.

Screenshots of the wish list can be found [https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-thoughts-questions.661/page-671#post-1887026 here].

Trolls responded by spamming the "Buying this gift elsewhere?" option<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/12-13-seasons-greetings.15325/page-17#post-1152508</ref>. Chris believed that the items disappearing meant that he would be getting lots of toys for Christmas. Of course, he reacted to this supposed good fortune by '''making another wish list''', containing over $1,000 worth of Transformers action figures, Amiibos, and DVDs.<ref>[[December 2015 Facebook Posts#Chris reveals his measurements]]</ref>

Screenshots of the second wish list can be found [https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-12-21-chris-on-amazon-wishlists-and-donating-a-ps4.15610/page-3#post-1162967 here].

He also requested "pretty dresses of blue or red" and gave his measurements as "44/39/40." Notably, one of the items he had marked as highest priority was the [[Megatron pistol]], implying that the original was lost or damaged in the 2014 house fire.

'''2016'''

During [[February 2016]], Chris begged his audience to buy him a PS4 with accessories for his birthday<ref>[[February 2016 Facebook Posts#GIMME STUFF FOR MY BIRTHDAY]]</ref>. He did not use Amazon, saying, "the Amazon Wish List is a definite fickle."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/February_2016_Facebook_Posts#GIMME_STUFF_FOR_MY_BIRTHDAY</ref>

He provided a wish list with several links to stores such as GameStop and Best Buy. Notably, he had ended his "[[Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers|embargo]]" against those shops, specifically to allow his fans to go there and buy him gifts.

He tried to provide an incentive, by offering a $500 voucher for his [[Etsy]] shop:

{{quotebox| The FIRST Person who purchases and sends me one, and I receive it Before or On February 24, 2016, I Will make and issue to the person a Big Voucher for $500 off on Cwcville Shopping. Which is equal to Ten Sonichu/Rosechu family Figures (more or less, depending on which ones), so all the person needs to pay on that order is the Shipping, and that order will definitely take up to Eight weeks for material figure acquiring, creations and certification.}}

After his birthday passed with no PS4, Chris uploaded [[Update: 2/25/16]], in which he complained about the lack of gifts, saying he had only gotten empty gift cards and a non-winning lottery ticket. He concluded the video by saying, "thanks for nothing!" In [[March 2016]], Chris [[Sonichu's First PS4 Broadcast|claimed]] that he had received a PS4 from [[Gal Pal E-mails 4#Used Porn for Sale|Kagney Lynn Moore]]. In reality, Chris had bought it himself<ref>[[March 2016 Facebook Posts#PS4 Thanks]]</ref>.

In [[November 2016]], Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Wish list for 2016|posted]] another wish list, days after making [[Pmurt#Death Threats|death threats against President-elect Donald Trump]]. He requested $859.71 worth of toys<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-11-12-chriss-2016-wish-list-transformers-joke.25759/page-4#post-1876942</ref>. He also [[Chris and negotiation|forbade people from sending him gift cards]].

Halfway through November, Chris tweeted that he had bought several of the toys off his own wish list.<ref>[[Twitter#More wish list demands]]</ref>

On 26 November, Chris updated his wish list, removing the items he had bought from it<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Updated wish list]]</ref>and surprisingly not adding more toys, in spite of the [[Help, please]] begging video he had made in the meantime. However, the updated wish list's links were all broken, due to Chris simply copy-and-pasting the message from an earlier post. He failed to notice, even though the post has a large Page Not Found error thumbnail on it.

===YouTube monetization===
Chris has monetized most of the videos which appear on his YouTube channel, as another way of [[Etsy|profiting]] from his internet infamy. As further proof of Chris's entitlement issues, [[CatKnight Interview|Arthur Spatchcock]] discovered that at one point around [[March 2016]], Chris received $80 and was "pissed" that he hadn't gotten more.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-6#post-1496271</ref>

{{quotebox|This is going to become a pattern. Chris is going to do one of his 'Let's Plays' followed by an e-begging video and then polish it off by purchasing some dumb thing he doesn't need in excess of fifty bucks. He knows how this system works and it's the greatest amount of payoff with the least amount of work; the first time when Chris played Destiny he made 80$ from Youtube(And was surprisingly pissed it was that small, fuck that, I want eighty bucks from Youtube). Then he makes a video whining about how he needs more money and lo and behold, he gets even more~! If anything people are contributing to his float and that convinces him he can get away with being frivolous that much more. }}

===Let’s Plays===
In [[March 2016]], [[CatKnight Interview|Arthur Spatchcock]] introduced Chris to the idea of doing Let's Plays to boost his online activity and help him gain some money through YouTube's monetization program<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chrischan-interview-part-4-5-3-28-16.16934/page-16#post-1317924</ref><ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-6#post-1496271</ref>. The plan fell apart after Let's Plays of [[CWC's Destiny start|Destiny]] and [[Live Game Stream - Uncharted|Uncharted]], since by that point, Chris was [[Chris and Health|too lazy]] to play video games for money, and he simply wanted to [[Financhu Crisis|beg from his audience]] instead.

===YouTube Support button===
On 23 May 2016, Chris [[Live Game Stream - Uncharted|announced]] the debut of a Support button on his YouTube channel to replace the Etsy donation listing (which was forcibly removed due to it violating Etsy's TOS). He apparently got this idea from [[William Elliott Waterman]].<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-reads-unicorns-rainbows-and-a-bluebird-of-happiness.21663/page-24#post-1563368]]</ref>

===Paypal.me===
Announced on 11 [[May 2017]].

{{quotebox|Cwcville Shopping I am the original creator of Sonichu and Rosechu, with more than eleven comic books worth of content under my helm. Please donate to help me quell my financial problems that quell my creativity. Ruckersville, VA}}

===Prostitution===
On 19 June 2016, aka Father’s Day, Chris decided to become [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|a prostitute]].

He has yet to receive any takers.

===Begging===
{{main|Financhu Crisis}}
[[File:Please, Donate (720p).mp400001.png|thumb|Chris, proving he has zero self-awareness]]
One of the earliest instances of Chris e-begging for money was in [[9 December 2009|December of 2009]]. Chris exhorted his alleged European [[Trolls|fanbase]] to donate €1,000 in order to remove troll ads from the CWCipedia.

In 2014, after his house [[Destruction Of Chris's House|caught fire]], Chris again resorted to e-begging for money, placing extra emphasis on ''"My mother and I really need the money,"'' despite dropping more than '''$5,000''' on expensive [[Lego]] sets to feed his worsening addiction. One would think that Chris would have wised up to the fact that his wanton spending and lack of gainful employment are contributing to his woes, but one glance at his [[May 2014 Facebook Posts]] could easily tell you that he's seeing his situation as an avenue to get stuff from people, the most ridiculous of which being a "$300 Sea Cow" on his wish list, which would not benefit anybody but himself in the slightest.

In 2016, Chris's e-begging drastically increased, as a result of the Chandlers' stubborn refusal to live within their means. That year saw Chris spend over $1,000 on toys, while both Chris and Barb had court cases resolved which penalized them with steep costs. In addition, Barb joined in to the begging, appearing in three videos so far.<ref>[[Donations Required, Serious. Please help]]</ref><ref>[[Donations Requested, Please]]</ref><ref>[[Donations Further Requested, Please]]</ref>

He asked for donations, or at least mentioned them, in many of the posts and videos he made in 2015 through 2016. At first, this was supposedly to fund his production of Sonichu merchandise, but he later shifted to saying that he and Barb needed help with paying the bills and buying groceries. While it's entirely possible that Chris was simply lying to get more money for [[Lego|useless]] [[Video games|crap]], this indicates that the financial hardships, which [[White knights|many]] [[Trolls|people]] have warned him about, have finally arrived. Only time will tell how his financial situation ultimately plays out, but given his attitude and inaction, the future definitely doesn't seem bright.

==In the comic==

[[File:Cwccash.jpg|thumb|250px|[[CWCville]] currency.]]
In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris in real life. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the [[United States of America|American]] populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two-story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21#Home economics|"paid" in average]] of US$3,500 a month just to hang around. And maybe for the occasional [[Sonichu 9|city defense]] or [[A Sonichu Day|errand]].<ref>[[Mailbag 21#Home economics]]</ref>

While legislating as mayor of [[CWCville]], he equated 10 years in prison to a US$1,500 fine.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> He also equated fifty hours of [[Wikipedia:Community service|community service]] to $500 (for any [[sex]]ual violations).<ref>[[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck]]</ref>

In [[Sonichu_9#Episode_19:_Date_Ed_.28Even_Though_the_Idea_Sounds_Dated.29|Episode 19]], it's shown that CWCVille actually issues its own currency, in the form of C-Quarters and W-Quarters. Ten C-Quarters make up a W-Quarter - don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, considering [[honor roll|what the word "quarter" means]]. (Our best guess: C-Quarters = US$0.25, W-Quarters = US$2.50) Nor does it explain why fines are levied in U.S. dollars: perhaps to bolster the dictatorship's foreign currency reserves, ''à la'' [[Wikipedia:North Korea|North Korea]].

This makes even less sense considering [[CWCVille]] is part of the [[United States]]. States, let alone cities, cannot print their own money, despite holding considerable power over their own affairs. The Constitution expressly forbids anyone else other than the federal government from issuing currency. However, it has been somewhat common for companies, communities and local governments to issue localized currency known as 'scrip', a depression era practice still seen from time to time. [[Chris]] being Chris, and likely reading [[Goosebumps]] instead of paying attention in class likely is wholly unaware of this information.

On the [[CWCipedia]] article on Sonichu, Chris wrote that [[Rosechu]] is usually the one who cooks for her family, but when Sonichu cooks for his wife and [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|kids]] he "will go as HIGH in portions as a Banquet", even though he only cooks for five individuals.<ref name=>[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#Married Life and Children Sonichu]</ref> This suggest that Sonichu is just as frivolous with money as his father.

===Soup hotels===

Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American [[Wikipedia:Social Security (United States)|Social Security]] system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]." This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels.|Chris with a very bad idea [http://leoweekly.com/news/left-wayside that has come to fruition in one American city...]}}

Chris depicts "Soup Hotels" as buildings ten stories tall with between ten and twenty rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, beds, lighting and cable television.<ref>[[Mailbag 20#This still implies that CWCville has a massive homeless problem]]</ref> Of course, the homeless stay there for free. So, instead of building homeless shelters with dormitories, common rooms, and shared TV sets, Chris thinks the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a ''bona fide'' hotel. This means that, in [[CWCville]], there are around 1,500 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, choked by heavy taxes needed to pay those social expenses, being unable to make a profit there and thus moving away.

In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], [[Ultra Sonichu]] and a bevy of [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechus]] stop at a soup hotel. The building is labeled Soup Hotel 17, implying that [[CWCville]] has had to open at least seven new homeless shelters in the span of a month, or they're just bad at numbering the things. Or more tellingly, that the economy of CWCville is crashing to the ground, fast.

==In other works==
In [[Mumble 6]], Chris discussed making a TV show called ''The Chris Chandler Show''. One of his demands was the show should not have any commercial breaks, either showing a distinct lack of understanding as to how a TV station makes money, or perhaps he plans to sell the advertising fees to a single company so that they can play a long ad in the beginning of the air time and leave the rest of the show uninterrupted, ''à-la'' the season premieres of [[wikipedia:24 (TV Series)|''24'']]. We cannot know for sure, but he has probably seen at least one show that has done this, and gathered the idea from there.

In [[Mailbag 29#In which Chris loses his mind|Mailbag 29]] he stated that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of state-run brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp, pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free [[Dating education|Sex Ed classes]] for [[virgin]]s.

In real life, according to Chris, he tried to scam his way out of paying for sex with a Craigslist [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|prostitute]] who was charging $100 per hour by telling her about the trolls, his life story, and his many personal problems. He said the prostitute then hung up on him.

Chris also proves us that, in the possibility of being part of a family, he wouldn't be the main purveyor. In the [[PlayingHouse]] video, his [[sweetheart]] of [[Jackie|the moment]] is portrayed as a successful journalist with high ambitions while he's a [[14 Branchland Court|stay at home]] Dad. Even then, he portrays himself doing "hard work" like [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|changing diapers]] and watching over the kids. In this last role, he's so incompetent that he needs to recruit his [[Crystal|preschool daughter]] to watch over [[Reginald Chandler|his son]] while he's shopping. This is paralleled by his real life situation - with [[Bob]] gone, one would assume that he'd be the "man of the house" and assume some responsibility for once. Unfortunately, as evidenced by his [[This is how the Trial went|admission in court,]] Barb is still pulling his ass out of any such concept by paying his court fees. Keep in mind that, by extension, Chris is being minded by an ailing woman's retirement money which was used to bail him out of a mess that ''he'' started, while he wastes his own money on meaningless frivolities.

== Conclusion ==

Given Chris's carefree abandon when it comes to his spending habits, many are actually concerned as to what will happen to Chris when Barb passes on and he has to fend for himself. If past (and present) experiences are any indication, it's that if Chris continues on his path of not saving his money and spending it on frivolous crap that he doesn't need, he'll wind up broke and in severe debt. A [[Mumble_4|past conversation]] with [[Clyde Cash]] revealed that he doesn't even know the basic expenses that go into running a household, and we all know how Chris's plan of [[PlayingHouse|marrying a sweetheart to dump all of the financial responsibilities on her]] will [[Sweetheart#Will Chris ever have a Sweetheart?|turn out.]]

Long story short, if Chris doesn't start saving for his future now, then when Barb finally passes on, he won't have one to look forward to. And he'll have nobody to blame but himself. ''(Not that he won't try, of course.)''

==See also==
*[[Monthly tugboat]]
*[[Financhu Crisis]]

== References ==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}
{{BusinessList}}

Chris and sex

2017-01-29T22:32:08Z

MindHit: /* Chris in the act */

{{Honest}}
{{DeadLinks}}

[[Chris]] has a warped view of '''sexual intercourse''' (a.k.a. '''hanky-panky''') as well as '''gender''', mostly stemming from stunted sexual development, a sheltered upbringing, and the twisted, disjointed worldview he acquired as a result. He first developed an understanding of sex from watching softcore porn on HBO at around age 16. He describes pornographic films as "educational".<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#Chris Sets the Record STRAIGHT]]</ref>

==Knowledge of sex and gender==
In his mind, Chris has mastered all there is to know about sex, and now regards himself as a bit of a guru. He has said that kissing a woman is "magical and delightful... sweet and melting like ice cream or chocolate", a description he stole from ''[[Sailor Moon]]''.<ref>[[Mailbag 18#He might as well be talking about how to pilot the space shuttle|Mailbag 18]]</ref> In truth, for much of the time he was presenting this advice Chris had yet to even kiss a girl.<ref name="Jackie E-mails 2">[[Jackie E-mails 2]]</ref>

What he knows about sex he's picked up from rudimentary [[high school]] [[Dating education|sex education]] or [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|pornography]]. This has engendered many false beliefs in Chris, which he sticks to religiously. Readers who brave his [[Chris Sex Logs|sex chat logs]] should immediately notice what's going wrong--Chris's fantasies are merely recreations of what he's seen in pornos, rather than plausible sexual experiences. For example, he believed that [[Kacey]] would welcome a brutal tit-fucking followed by load after load of [[navy]] to the face.<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>

Other examples of Chris's crude misconceptions about sex abound. He mimics female porn stars' sex positions, spreads an imaginary vagina a yard across,<ref name="JR Eyes">[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]</ref> thinks that the clitoris is located on the female body where the [[wikipedia:Perineum|perineum]] is located on the male one<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts#Introducing the Un-clit]]</ref> and believes that electric shocks to the vagina are pleasurable.<ref name="Cums cat">[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]</ref> He also seems to believe that a woman's vagina is higher up on the woman's body that it actually is;<ref>[[:File:SchuComicSP3P7.jpg]]</ref> this is undoubtedly due to his experience with his [[Kimmi|sex]] [[Officer Nasty|dolls]]. The "missionary cowgirl" position mentioned in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] is a contradiction in terms. He can't even get the most basic double entendres correct, wearing a terrible [[CWC Cola|Mountain Dew]] parody shirt thinking it's an invitation for women to try and ride his broken [[penis]].<ref name="JR Eyes" /> He thinks that his [[Virgin with rage|virginity]] is a precious and sought-after treasure which women will come in droves to take (he even went so far as to use it as a bargaining chip to haggle with a prostitute), and believes that [[mass debating]] ultimately makes him better at sex.

With Chris's [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]], he is also noticeably confused about basic sexual terminology. For example, Chris told Ivy he had a "sticky dream" about her. When Ivy asked if he meant a wet dream, he replied, "No, that's when you pee yourself, silly!"<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#Threats]]</ref> While he may have the best of intentions, his word choices unwittingly present him in a very bad light. He refuses to use common terms--either medical or slang--for sex organs, instead calling penises "[[duck]]s" and "[[pickle]]s", and vaginas and vulvae "[[china]]" or "tom-tom" out of a childish aversion borne of disgust.

In [[August 2011]], Chris said he is into female domination.<ref>[[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]]</ref> (going as far as to draw Sonichu and Rosechu performing the act in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]).

===[[Chris and gender|Gender in general]]===
Similar to [[Chris and religion|the topic of faith]], Chris's actual beliefs on gender are more complex than his stated beliefs. Over his life, he has developed a burning hatred of males [[JERKS#The list of males Chris doesn't hate|in general]], not unlike [https://encyclopediadramatica.se/Aeverine_Nieves another autistic on] [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] noted for his/her similarities to Chris. This likely spirals back to his bullying by other boys at school, not to mention the fact that Chris is known to fly into fits of [[Chris and his ego|jealous]] [[Chris and anger|rage]] whenever he sees [[Liquid Chris|a man more successful than him]], especially if [[Clyde Cash|that]] [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|man]] [[Wes Iseli|is getting some]] and he isn't. Inversely, whenever trolls invented a [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]] for him, Chris would make [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|childish YouTube videos]] [[SHE IS MINE NOW|wherein he would gloat]] to their supposed exes. Chris's infantile, jealousy-driven hatred of his own gender has even led him to label [[JERKS|all men]] [[Chris and hypocrisy|"barbarian[s]"]]. This bizarre view may also have contributed to his [[Tomgirl|decision to cross-dress]].

Inversely, Chris repeatedly asserts his reverence of women, and seems to have a comparatively glowing opinion of them, stating that he finds women "empathetic". But, as stated at the beginning of the section, the truth is more complicated. While Chris has always preferred female friends, and is known to be far more accommodating of lesbians than gay men, even going so far as to [[Chris and reality|identify as one himself]], in truth, Chris has a distinctly sexist view of [[Women's rights|women]]. Based on his failed attempts at getting girls at the mall, he has concluded that all girls are [[Boyfriend-free girl|already paired up]], [[Homos|lesbians]], or distracted with shopping. The notion that they might have good reasons for spurning his advances does not occur to him. By all accounts, Chris seems to place all women into one of two categories - organic [[Officer Nasty|sex]] [[Kimmi|toys]] who exist to submit to his every desire, or [[Barb|mother]] [[Gal-pals|figures]] who exist to dote on him, keep his child-like, responsibility-free lifestyle sustainable, and nurse his wounded [[ego]] whenever the need arises.

In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], he referred to women as another species. This seems to be hyperbole, but considering Chris' abysmal knowledge of the sciences, it is difficult to be sure.

Chris has an interesting grasp of stereotypical straight and non-straight behavior, too, insisting he is straight even as he acts like a stereotypical mincing, [[Tomgirl|crossdressing]] transsexual. This can be explained by his [[autism|lack of empathy or ability to pick up on social cues]], but given his reaction to being told he looks "gay" is to scream "NO I'M NOT!" and ignore anything else, it's unlikely he'll ever learn.

As of 2015, Chris has stated his preference for female pronouns, going so far as to dub himself "Christine Weston Chandler" on his Facebook. As of 11 February, 2015, Chris has started signing the medallions he sells on eBay with this name. From this it can be inferred that he was using the tomgirl label as a stepping stone into full blown transsexualism. Whether or not Chris is legitimately transsexual remains to be seen. As it is unlikely he will ever willingly see a therapist regarding his gender issues (or [[Chris and psychology|any]] [[Chris and anger|other]] [[Chris and health|of]] [[Chris and his Ego|his]] [[Chris and reality|issues]] for that matter), we may never have a definitive answer.

==Moral basis on sex and double standards==
[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|thumb|250px|69ing? Intercourse? ''Really''? In a ''children's'' comic? Because they should know all about this stuff.]]
{{quote|You have heard that it was said by them of old time, You shall not commit adultery: but I say to you, that whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.|Matthew 5:27-28}}

Sex as viewed through Chris's eyes is (partially) dictated by the Bible - or rather, by his religion, as Chris's Biblical knowledge is extremely poor. Chris is very strict on keeping to the word of God when male homosexuality is the topic, vehemently stating that he ''hates'' homos, but with no hesitation views lesbian porn and approves of it [[Mass debating|masturbatorily]]<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref>, and as of 2014, seemed to be adopting a more progressive view of even gay men and their rights (albeit begrudgingly). In 2015 Chris made a video lamenting his "past" homophobia and clarifying that he apparently now has great liking and admiration for male homosexuality, [[Retroactive continuity|retconning]] the viscous homophobic tirade of [[Sonichu 10]] into a bizarre zombie apocalypse, implying that he realizes religion is not an excuse for discrimination. Another violation of his Christian morals is the fact that he planned on losing his virginity on the [[Third date|third or fourth date]] with his true sweetheart (read: first girl who will last three dates with Chris). This is, of course, blatant violation of the Christian value of marriage before sex.

The Bible also frowns upon [[Nudes|pornographers]], of which he is very guilty and holds no apparent [[Chris and remorse|remorse]]. These double standards cause many trolls to despise him, seeing as he selectively chooses what to denigrate and what is OK in his own personal dogma, although to be fair, the same is true of many Christians anyway.

Despite people pointing out these contradictions, even quoting passages of the Bible, he will deny it. This is most likely because he goes to [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|a very liberal church]], so any question about premarital sex is probably interpreted quite liberally, and Chris believes that his church and ''only'' his church defines the entirety of religious morality - as it applies to him, anyway. When Chris asks Rocky about passages quoted to him by [[trolls]], she only fuels his à la carte Christianity by saying things like sex before marriage is okay as long as the couple is in love, which contradicts Christian doctrine.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> In summary, Chris picks and chooses what parts of Christian doctrine suit his own prejudices, and disregards the ones that would interfere with his [[Love Quest]].

[[File:Female anatomy according to chris.png|thumb|A moderately detailed portrait of what Chris probably thought females looked like before meeting [[Mia Hamm]].]]

Chris seems to consider a female sexual partner as a rubber stamp over his (alleged) sexual orientation. Flying in the face of any moral system he's ever held, he announced his desire to upload on the Internet a video of his first full sexual intercourse, even if his hypothetical partner refused to consent to it.<ref>[[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The Introduction Image Space is NOT Ad Space (CCS)]]</ref> After further prodding, he added that he would simply hide the camera, record the event without her consent and blur her face before making the video public.<ref>[[Mailbag 31#In which Chris crosses yet another line]]</ref> In [[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]], Chris indicated that if a woman accused him of being gay in person, he would sexually assault them by demanding they submit to a kiss and allow him to videotape the act, possibly as a way of proving his straightness.

For Chris, as stated above, [[Women's rights|a woman is just a living, sentient sex-toy]], existing only to validate him as a heterosexual. As long as they're straight and younger than him, of course.

==Chris in the act==
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|frame|right|Christian professing his love for "[[Julie]]".]]
Leaked tapes of Chris's audio sex with [[Julie]], and the infamous sex tape with Kimmi shed light on Chris as he acts out on his fantasies. In particular, the sex tape shows how Chris assumes ''female'' positions, notably riding on top of Kimmi in a scene straight out of a porno. It seems that Chris's entirety of knowledge about sexual relationships stems from ignoring the men in pornography (due to fear of becoming a homo).

However, it should be noted that in most of Chris's Rule 34 drawings the characters do tend to assume positions which are fitting for their gender, including Chris.<ref>For examples, see the [[Sonichu 8#The uncensored scenes|uncensored panels]] from Sonichu 8, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]], the [[Giant Penis Comic]] and [[Jackie E-mails 14]].</ref> It might be that Chris adopts female positions not so much due to ignorance regarding sex, but more because of [[Tomgirl pictures|his identification with the opposite gender]].

Chris's view of cunnilingus, put on display in [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]], involves slobbering all over a woman's vagina. Despite all his knowledge of porn, he fails to see how cunnilingus is more than just slobbering, but proper tongue action to stimulate the clitoris.

In the leaked media, Chris displays that he may have some issues with delayed orgasm. This can either be physiological (bent duck, [[Obesity|being overweight]], lack of endurance) or psychological in nature (performance anxiety, high expectations, intrusive homoerotic thoughts, subconscious guilt about sex), or a combination thereof.

==Staying straight==
{{see also|Homos#Fear of being a homo|l1=Fear of being a homo}}

==Is Chris asexual?==
Some autistics simply do not understand sexual attraction (for example, high-functioning autistic and [[Wikipedia:Hug machine|hugbox]] inventor Temple Grandin chooses to be celibate because she admits that she really does not understand sexual attraction and that she lacks the ability, as a consequence of her autism, to engage in a sexual relationship). This could explain some of Chris's views regarding sex and romance; he genuinely cannot understand the appeal of most sexual activity, aside from the fact he's seen people in the media do it and that he thinks that sex is something all men need to experience in order to become complete adults.

As the act of sexual intercourse and relationships in general are fairly social activities, it's quite possible that Chris views the act of losing his virginity as something of a rite of passage--something he needs to do in order to validate his own sexuality and prove to the world that he's a capable "adult". Chris also fails to realize that relationships are give and take. Every sweetheart that Chris has had, which eventually turned out to be a troll involved long, received relentless emails and calls in which Chris prattled on and on about how much he "loved" them and how he was looking forward to finally having sex. After supposedly losing his virginity, it's unknown if he still craves sexual intercourse as much as he did before. One thing is still certain, however, is that he still fervently desires the attention of a sweetheart.

After he was introduced to the term by his Mailbag correspondents, Chris took to interpreting and using "asexual" as an insult. In his [[CWCipedia]] page on [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia Page)|The Wallflower]], he referred to her as a "Got-Dang Asexual Woman!". He also became very offended when [[Jackie]] implied that he liked [[video games]] more than women, ranting that she should not label him as asexual (and missed her point completely).<ref name="Jackie E-mails 2" />

However, considering Chris's incessant shoehorning of entirely unnecessary sex into the comics, and the ludicrous efforts he goes to get some [[China]], he does seem to possess sexual desire - though not necessarily for women, as these things could simply be part of his efforts to disprove his much-feared [[homosexuality]].

==Pedophilia==
{{main|Pedofork}}

==Bestiality==
{{quote|I can imagine myself doing it with a [[Patti-chan|collie]] at least. you know, like Lassie.|Chris to [[PandaHalo]]<ref name="collie">[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>}}
[[File:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Run, Patti, run!]]
[[File:Super-mode.jpg|thumb|left|90px|Chris, sporting a [[ECV 00002‎|homemade fursuit]].]]

In [[December 2008]], Chris told [[PandaHalo]] he would be willing to have sex with a female dog for her.<ref name="collie" /> However, in his [[Chris-chan Discusses...‎|interview with ScrewAttackEurope]], Chris says he's against bestiality, then hoists himself by his own petard by claiming that Sonichu & co. are not "half-humans" but "all-animals" with human form; so technically this isn't bestiality, as they're animals having sex with each other.

Chris suggested that Brian from ''[[Family Guy]]'' be paired up with "any sexy breed" of dog.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Family_Guy#Story_of_the_CWC_Episode_for_.22Family_Guy.22 The Family Guy article on CWCipedia]</ref>

In [[The Red-Maned Deer]], Chris recites a poem he wrote about having sex with a deer, but at the end of it states, "This was, in fact, NOT an act of bestiality. For you see, the Red-Maned Deer I have been communicating with and tracking, is really...my lo-my womanly sweetheart, named [[Jacklyn Romy]]."<ref>[[The Red-Maned Deer]]</ref> The fact that the deer is Jackie is obvious, but in spite of this he explicitly stated that it was her at the end.

In a photo of the [[Rental House]] from June 2014, the Chandler minivan bears a bumper sticker reading "I Sleep with Dogs".<ref>[[:File:Chandler Cars 1600w.jpg]]</ref> What exactly this means is yet to be determined.

===Is Chris a furry?===
Whether or not Chris can actually be considered a furry is still debated.<ref>From [[Sarah May Skype Logs#Chris tries to leave|the Sarah May Skype Logs]]: [7:17:25] '''Sarah May''': Did you feel sexually aroused when you drew them? [7:17:34] '''Christopher C.W.C.''': a bit.</ref> There are some things that point in that direction. [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] is in many ways similar to a fursona. Chris has also used the character while cybering with [[Julie]].<ref name="Cums cat" /> Finally, in the [[Giant Penis Comic]], Chris and [[Ivy]] both morph into fursonas during the act of sex. However, it has been confirmed by [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] that Chris is actually prejudiced against furries, not because of who they are, but because many furries tend to be [[homos]].<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Racism and homophobia]]</ref>
{{-}}

==Prostitution==
Given how badly Chris wanted to lose his virginity, many observers have wondered why he didn't immediately spend some of his [[tugboat]] on a prostitute. [[Mumble 4]], from [[February 2009]], answered that question for a while. There, Chris explained that paying for sex would render the act "meaningless," and he was - in a rare display of common sense - afraid of contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

[[Image:Virginbreaker.png|thumb|Chris' leaked [[Facebook]] announcement that he had lost his virginity. Initially igniting a firestorm of controversy, Chris himself let it slip that she was found "somewhere on the backpage" soon after.]]

Needs must as the devil drives, though. While being blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of [[2009]], Chris attempted to solicit the services of a Craigslist prostitute to fuck on camera so he could recover his hacked [[PlayStation Network]] accounts. After describing his personal problems to the prostitute, she hung up on him. Chris was apparently trying to get free sex from the hooker with long, rambling stories about his horrible life to try and gain sympathy. He was genuinely shocked when she didn't offer to fuck him out of pity, unaware that prostitutes, by definition, only have sex with men for money.

Previously, in [[March 2009]], [[Brian Bash]] had sent a trio of prostitutes to [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] so he would no longer be a virgin with rage. [[Hooker incident|Hilarity ensued]].

By the beginning of [[2010]], Chris's views on prostitution had further softened. According to his [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|conversations with Vivian Gee]], around the turn of the year he was attempting to save $100 out of his monthly budget to buy himself a whore for his 28th [[birthday]]. This, presumably, was the "hundred dollars for a damn hooker" he referred to when [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|begging the Wallflower for sex]] on YouTube in [[March 2010]].

Between [[April 2010|April]] and [[July 2010]], under the name of [[Carlos Chantor]], Chris tried to offer himself up as a male escort. He described himself as "[[Chris and reality|Experienced for Her Pleasure]]", with an [[obesity|average]] body type.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref>

Later, under the guise of his troll persona [[JenkinsJinkies]], Chris attempted to acquire the contact details of the hookers Brian Bash had previously hired. While it is possible that Chris merely wished to make his disguise more convincing by implying that 14 year old Jenkins wished to hire prostitutes, it seems far more likely that Chris actually was considering hiring Brian's girls.

In [[April 2012]] a [[Facebook]] status leaked in which Chris announced that he was no longer a virgin. Suspicion arose that this was due to the help of a hooker. Chris provided further evidence suggesting that the girl was a prostitute on 1 [[May 2012|May]] when he wrote in a [[Facebook#Hey, Trollies|Facebook note]] that his virgin breaker can be found "somewhere on the [[Wikipedia:Backpage|backpage]]", a website known for featuring sex service ads.<ref>[http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/19/opinion/kristof-not-quite-a-teen-yet-sold-for-sex.html?_r=1]</ref> On 28/29 June 2014 Chris openly admitted that his first time was with a prostitute, and that he had sex with her twice.<ref>[[Other documents#Chris's wingman]]</ref>

==Incest==
{{incomplete}}

[[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]], Chris's imaginary twin sister, appeared as a [[:image:153-GirlfriendsGift.jpg|"girlfriend" card]] he made for ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'', and her attractiveness and desirability are brought up several times in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] comics well after being established as Chris's twin. Chris has shown complete ignorance in matters incestuous before; his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] are all related, but many of them are paired off with one-another, banging and some even [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|having]] [[Sandy Rosechu|kids]].

Chris first expounded his views on incest to the internet on 31 [[January 2009]] during the [[Mumble 1|first Mumble chat]], when it was revealed that he did not fully understood the meaning of the word "incest". While he showed aversion toward incest in the chat, his condemnation of it was lukewarm, saying that he would only "definitely discourage that" and that lesbian incest is "possibly OK" due to no reproduction being involved. Compare this to his statements about male homosexuality from the same chat ("I hate homo males [...] I'd sooner have a [[Tomgirl Saga|sex change]] before I would ever turn into a homo") or to his statements about male homosexuality from earlier that month, saying that he would make it a crime and force its practitioners into having sex with members of the opposite gender.<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]]</ref>

A year later, Chris's views became staunch. When a correspondent in the [[Mailbag]] pointed out that Chris's state allows cousin marriage but not same-sex marriage, Chris furiously denied it and wrote, "Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN MOTHER OR FATHER!"<ref>[[Common Questions#5 January 2010]]</ref> When another correspondent responded to Chris by saying that he is happily married to his cousin and that their marriage is indeed legal in Virginia, Chris answered him by saying he was destined to hell for his relationship.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#Good luck in hell]]</ref>, not realizing that Incest is shown in a positive light in [[Chris and religion|the Bible]]. When the subject came up again in the next mailbag, Chris said that sexual relations between cousins are just as wrong as incest between parents and their children or between siblings, and that all those relationships were condemned in the "same part" of the Bible, <ref>[[Mailbag 35#I think he wanted a specific verse]]</ref> which is not actually true. <ref> [[http://www.cousincouples.com/?page=religion]]</ref>

===Dreams of sex with Barb===
On 10 August 2016, Chris posted a [[Facebook statuses|response]] to a mother-son couple who were arrested for incest He admitted to "[having] dreams of having sex with my mother" but "Never acting on them ever". Among other things, he also implied that incest "offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s).". All this is in stark contrast to his earlier condemnation of incest, which begs the question about whether Chris was being TRUE and HONEST but changed his opinion later thanks to his growing degeneracy, or the likelier possibility it was [[Hypocrisy|all for show]].
====Transcript====
I have a few things to say in response to this article. Firstly, the child was over 18, and surely the mother has talked it out with him beforehand. The child might have had social problems, or a situation where socializing or going out to socialize with other people, was a Greater Difficulty. Financial situation to prevent paying someone else to come over and help out in the situation. Moreover, it was the lifelong affections between parent and child. Also, the mother probably could not bear any ovum for children anymore.
Anyhow, who among Everyone in this world has not had a dream of having sex with one of their parents? Never acting on them ever, I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with my mother.
Although incest is quite controversial topic, but there are circumstances where there would be not so much harm as one may think, feel or believe. The child is over 18; the mother is unable to have any more children at the time; birth control and protection is available and can be used (in a case of father/daughter, birth control Definitely should be used anyhow). Also, consider if the child is adopted; not as much biological.
Plus, this offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s). The schools can only teach from books; not so much practice. And Nobody wants to end up being a 20 or 30-plus year old Virgin. I know; That is a Huge, Enduring Pain.
Unless the sex act was abusive, hurtful, or Would result in an unwanted birth of a physical or mental challenged child, I would not judge or persecute the parent and child. I would encourage the child to socialize more; maybe make it easier for the child to meet more people his/her age.
Do Not send the mother and son to jail!

==Rape==

{{Protip|Despite your worst fears, Chris won't rape anybody, so stop saying that.}}

Chris is very apathetic about the idea of rape. When [[PandaHalo]] told him she was raped by [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]], he reacted nonchalantly. He even thought it would be appropriate for Panda to move in with her rapist, whom he called a "good man" for regretting the rape and for being willing to take care of the ensuing child.<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref> Later on, long after the PandaHalo saga was over, he would wish her and her rapist a happy marriage.<ref>[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)#Sarah Cassandra McKenzie, A.K.A. PandaHalo]]</ref> In [[iPods Down and Listen Up]], he doesn't seem to realize that his improvised lyrics detail a sexual act that would almost certainly be construed by others as rape. More recently, he has taken to comparing his ordeals with the trolls to rape in his Facebook posts.

As far as ''Chris'' being a potential rapist is concerned, during a particularly [[IRC (23 July 2009)|disturbing chat]], he ([[:File:BillRiley.jpg|incognito]]) suggested that the trolls try to convince him to rape [[Rocky Shoemaker]].

In all likelihood, though, these parts of his behavior are most likely explained by the keys to understanding his behavior overall: his ignorance about the world and his persecution complex causes him to be quite [[naïve]] about how bad rape actually is. With the Rocky situation above, he likely said that as part of an odd, roundabout scheme to get the trolls arrested, but it's still pretty fucked up that he'd even suggest something like this, let alone tell her about it after.

Chris has a surprisingly mature moral opinion on the subject of abortion in cases of rape; in one of the [[Kacey Calls]], he states he believes that abortion in these cases should be the choice of the victim only and that they should not be pressured by others in their decision.

One might assume that he will one day try to rape someone due to this mindset and stalker tendencies, but this scenario is highly unlikely. For instance, he tried to kiss [[Emily]] and gave up when she said no,<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#A precious farewell (1:29:35–1:31:10)]]</ref> showing that he does understand the importance of consent....or at least, he ''used'' to. Unfortunately, it seems that as of 2014, he has decided that he won't take "no" for an answer, and basically ''molested'' [[Catherine#The Date|Catherine during their second outing]] by hugging her and burying his head in her breasts even after she flatly told him not to. This gets even more disturbing when you consider [[Catherine E-mails#It IS Your Fault!|this e-mail]], where Chris outright says that he's [[Chris and his Ego|"entitled to a relationship"]].

He also doesn't have a history of violence (indeed, quite, quite the opposite), and aside from his [[Death threats#Likelihood of Acting Out on Death Threats|habit of dishing out threats he can't possibly carry out]], Chris is physically [[Chris and health|very weak and unfit]], and simply could not overpower an able-bodied person - the only outcome of him attempting it would be a swift knee to the [[duck]] followed by a rousing round of [[Kick the Autistic|America's favorite game]]. However, given Catherine's experience with Chris during their outing (in her words, she was taken by surprise and couldn't react to it), potential sweethearts should still exercise some caution around him.

Interestingly, Chris details in [[Announcement 06292016]] that he wants all men to stay an arm's length distance away from him. Along with showing the insecurities he possesses concerning men, Chris seems to think that he is [[Tomgirl|female]] enough or [[Chris and his ego|attractive]] enough that [[Chris and reality|a man would want to rape him.]]

==Sexting==

<strike>[http://www.4shared.com/photo/ofavvePXce/Chris_Chan_Sexting.html Sexting Coversation]</strike> Link down. Please reupload.

==See also==
*[[Chris and his Ego]]
*[[Chris Sex Logs]]
*[[Duck]]
*[[Homos]]
*[[Mass debating]]
*[[Naive]]
*[[Pickle]]
*[[Semen]]
*[[ShecameforCWC.JPG]]
*[[Women's rights]]

== References ==
<references/>

{{Love quest}}
{{Chris and}}

Chris and sex

2017-01-29T22:31:17Z

MindHit: /* Is Chris asexual? */

{{Honest}}
{{DeadLinks}}

[[Chris]] has a warped view of '''sexual intercourse''' (a.k.a. '''hanky-panky''') as well as '''gender''', mostly stemming from stunted sexual development, a sheltered upbringing, and the twisted, disjointed worldview he acquired as a result. He first developed an understanding of sex from watching softcore porn on HBO at around age 16. He describes pornographic films as "educational".<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#Chris Sets the Record STRAIGHT]]</ref>

==Knowledge of sex and gender==
In his mind, Chris has mastered all there is to know about sex, and now regards himself as a bit of a guru. He has said that kissing a woman is "magical and delightful... sweet and melting like ice cream or chocolate", a description he stole from ''[[Sailor Moon]]''.<ref>[[Mailbag 18#He might as well be talking about how to pilot the space shuttle|Mailbag 18]]</ref> In truth, for much of the time he was presenting this advice Chris had yet to even kiss a girl.<ref name="Jackie E-mails 2">[[Jackie E-mails 2]]</ref>

What he knows about sex he's picked up from rudimentary [[high school]] [[Dating education|sex education]] or [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|pornography]]. This has engendered many false beliefs in Chris, which he sticks to religiously. Readers who brave his [[Chris Sex Logs|sex chat logs]] should immediately notice what's going wrong--Chris's fantasies are merely recreations of what he's seen in pornos, rather than plausible sexual experiences. For example, he believed that [[Kacey]] would welcome a brutal tit-fucking followed by load after load of [[navy]] to the face.<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>

Other examples of Chris's crude misconceptions about sex abound. He mimics female porn stars' sex positions, spreads an imaginary vagina a yard across,<ref name="JR Eyes">[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]</ref> thinks that the clitoris is located on the female body where the [[wikipedia:Perineum|perineum]] is located on the male one<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts#Introducing the Un-clit]]</ref> and believes that electric shocks to the vagina are pleasurable.<ref name="Cums cat">[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]</ref> He also seems to believe that a woman's vagina is higher up on the woman's body that it actually is;<ref>[[:File:SchuComicSP3P7.jpg]]</ref> this is undoubtedly due to his experience with his [[Kimmi|sex]] [[Officer Nasty|dolls]]. The "missionary cowgirl" position mentioned in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] is a contradiction in terms. He can't even get the most basic double entendres correct, wearing a terrible [[CWC Cola|Mountain Dew]] parody shirt thinking it's an invitation for women to try and ride his broken [[penis]].<ref name="JR Eyes" /> He thinks that his [[Virgin with rage|virginity]] is a precious and sought-after treasure which women will come in droves to take (he even went so far as to use it as a bargaining chip to haggle with a prostitute), and believes that [[mass debating]] ultimately makes him better at sex.

With Chris's [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]], he is also noticeably confused about basic sexual terminology. For example, Chris told Ivy he had a "sticky dream" about her. When Ivy asked if he meant a wet dream, he replied, "No, that's when you pee yourself, silly!"<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#Threats]]</ref> While he may have the best of intentions, his word choices unwittingly present him in a very bad light. He refuses to use common terms--either medical or slang--for sex organs, instead calling penises "[[duck]]s" and "[[pickle]]s", and vaginas and vulvae "[[china]]" or "tom-tom" out of a childish aversion borne of disgust.

In [[August 2011]], Chris said he is into female domination.<ref>[[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]]</ref> (going as far as to draw Sonichu and Rosechu performing the act in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]).

===[[Chris and gender|Gender in general]]===
Similar to [[Chris and religion|the topic of faith]], Chris's actual beliefs on gender are more complex than his stated beliefs. Over his life, he has developed a burning hatred of males [[JERKS#The list of males Chris doesn't hate|in general]], not unlike [https://encyclopediadramatica.se/Aeverine_Nieves another autistic on] [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] noted for his/her similarities to Chris. This likely spirals back to his bullying by other boys at school, not to mention the fact that Chris is known to fly into fits of [[Chris and his ego|jealous]] [[Chris and anger|rage]] whenever he sees [[Liquid Chris|a man more successful than him]], especially if [[Clyde Cash|that]] [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|man]] [[Wes Iseli|is getting some]] and he isn't. Inversely, whenever trolls invented a [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]] for him, Chris would make [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|childish YouTube videos]] [[SHE IS MINE NOW|wherein he would gloat]] to their supposed exes. Chris's infantile, jealousy-driven hatred of his own gender has even led him to label [[JERKS|all men]] [[Chris and hypocrisy|"barbarian[s]"]]. This bizarre view may also have contributed to his [[Tomgirl|decision to cross-dress]].

Inversely, Chris repeatedly asserts his reverence of women, and seems to have a comparatively glowing opinion of them, stating that he finds women "empathetic". But, as stated at the beginning of the section, the truth is more complicated. While Chris has always preferred female friends, and is known to be far more accommodating of lesbians than gay men, even going so far as to [[Chris and reality|identify as one himself]], in truth, Chris has a distinctly sexist view of [[Women's rights|women]]. Based on his failed attempts at getting girls at the mall, he has concluded that all girls are [[Boyfriend-free girl|already paired up]], [[Homos|lesbians]], or distracted with shopping. The notion that they might have good reasons for spurning his advances does not occur to him. By all accounts, Chris seems to place all women into one of two categories - organic [[Officer Nasty|sex]] [[Kimmi|toys]] who exist to submit to his every desire, or [[Barb|mother]] [[Gal-pals|figures]] who exist to dote on him, keep his child-like, responsibility-free lifestyle sustainable, and nurse his wounded [[ego]] whenever the need arises.

In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], he referred to women as another species. This seems to be hyperbole, but considering Chris' abysmal knowledge of the sciences, it is difficult to be sure.

Chris has an interesting grasp of stereotypical straight and non-straight behavior, too, insisting he is straight even as he acts like a stereotypical mincing, [[Tomgirl|crossdressing]] transsexual. This can be explained by his [[autism|lack of empathy or ability to pick up on social cues]], but given his reaction to being told he looks "gay" is to scream "NO I'M NOT!" and ignore anything else, it's unlikely he'll ever learn.

As of 2015, Chris has stated his preference for female pronouns, going so far as to dub himself "Christine Weston Chandler" on his Facebook. As of 11 February, 2015, Chris has started signing the medallions he sells on eBay with this name. From this it can be inferred that he was using the tomgirl label as a stepping stone into full blown transsexualism. Whether or not Chris is legitimately transsexual remains to be seen. As it is unlikely he will ever willingly see a therapist regarding his gender issues (or [[Chris and psychology|any]] [[Chris and anger|other]] [[Chris and health|of]] [[Chris and his Ego|his]] [[Chris and reality|issues]] for that matter), we may never have a definitive answer.

==Moral basis on sex and double standards==
[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|thumb|250px|69ing? Intercourse? ''Really''? In a ''children's'' comic? Because they should know all about this stuff.]]
{{quote|You have heard that it was said by them of old time, You shall not commit adultery: but I say to you, that whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.|Matthew 5:27-28}}

Sex as viewed through Chris's eyes is (partially) dictated by the Bible - or rather, by his religion, as Chris's Biblical knowledge is extremely poor. Chris is very strict on keeping to the word of God when male homosexuality is the topic, vehemently stating that he ''hates'' homos, but with no hesitation views lesbian porn and approves of it [[Mass debating|masturbatorily]]<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref>, and as of 2014, seemed to be adopting a more progressive view of even gay men and their rights (albeit begrudgingly). In 2015 Chris made a video lamenting his "past" homophobia and clarifying that he apparently now has great liking and admiration for male homosexuality, [[Retroactive continuity|retconning]] the viscous homophobic tirade of [[Sonichu 10]] into a bizarre zombie apocalypse, implying that he realizes religion is not an excuse for discrimination. Another violation of his Christian morals is the fact that he planned on losing his virginity on the [[Third date|third or fourth date]] with his true sweetheart (read: first girl who will last three dates with Chris). This is, of course, blatant violation of the Christian value of marriage before sex.

The Bible also frowns upon [[Nudes|pornographers]], of which he is very guilty and holds no apparent [[Chris and remorse|remorse]]. These double standards cause many trolls to despise him, seeing as he selectively chooses what to denigrate and what is OK in his own personal dogma, although to be fair, the same is true of many Christians anyway.

Despite people pointing out these contradictions, even quoting passages of the Bible, he will deny it. This is most likely because he goes to [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|a very liberal church]], so any question about premarital sex is probably interpreted quite liberally, and Chris believes that his church and ''only'' his church defines the entirety of religious morality - as it applies to him, anyway. When Chris asks Rocky about passages quoted to him by [[trolls]], she only fuels his à la carte Christianity by saying things like sex before marriage is okay as long as the couple is in love, which contradicts Christian doctrine.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> In summary, Chris picks and chooses what parts of Christian doctrine suit his own prejudices, and disregards the ones that would interfere with his [[Love Quest]].

[[File:Female anatomy according to chris.png|thumb|A moderately detailed portrait of what Chris probably thought females looked like before meeting [[Mia Hamm]].]]

Chris seems to consider a female sexual partner as a rubber stamp over his (alleged) sexual orientation. Flying in the face of any moral system he's ever held, he announced his desire to upload on the Internet a video of his first full sexual intercourse, even if his hypothetical partner refused to consent to it.<ref>[[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The Introduction Image Space is NOT Ad Space (CCS)]]</ref> After further prodding, he added that he would simply hide the camera, record the event without her consent and blur her face before making the video public.<ref>[[Mailbag 31#In which Chris crosses yet another line]]</ref> In [[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]], Chris indicated that if a woman accused him of being gay in person, he would sexually assault them by demanding they submit to a kiss and allow him to videotape the act, possibly as a way of proving his straightness.

For Chris, as stated above, [[Women's rights|a woman is just a living, sentient sex-toy]], existing only to validate him as a heterosexual. As long as they're straight and younger than him, of course.

==Chris in the act==
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|frame|right|Christian professing his love for "[[Julie]]".]]
Leaked tapes of Chris's audio sex with [[Julie]], and the infamous sex tape with Kimmi shed light on Chris as he acts out on his fantasies. In particular, the sex tape shows how Chris assumes ''female'' positions, notably riding on top of Kimmi in a scene straight out of a porno. It seems that Chris's entirety of knowledge about sexual relationships stems from ignoring the men in pornography (due to fear of becoming a homo).

However, it should be noted that in most of Chris's Rule 34 drawings the characters do tend to assume positions which are fitting for their gender, including Chris.<ref>For examples, see the [[Sonichu 8#The uncensored scenes|uncensored panels]] from Sonichu 8, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]], the [[Giant Penis Comic]] and [[Jackie E-mails 14]].</ref> It might be that Chris adopts female positions not so much due to ignorance regarding sex, but more because of [[Tomgirl pictures|his identification with the opposite gender]].

Chris's view of cunnilingus, put on display in [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]], involves slobbering all over a woman's vagina. Despite all his knowledge of porn, he fails to see how cunnilingus is more than just slobbering, but proper tongue action to stimulate the clitoris.

In the leaked media, Chris displays that he may have some issues with delayed orgasm. This can either be physiological (bent duck, [[Obesity|being overweight]], lack of endurance) or psychological (performance anxiety, high expectations, intrusive homoerotic thoughts, subconscious guilt about sex) in nature, or a combination thereof.

==Staying straight==
{{see also|Homos#Fear of being a homo|l1=Fear of being a homo}}

==Is Chris asexual?==
Some autistics simply do not understand sexual attraction (for example, high-functioning autistic and [[Wikipedia:Hug machine|hugbox]] inventor Temple Grandin chooses to be celibate because she admits that she really does not understand sexual attraction and that she lacks the ability, as a consequence of her autism, to engage in a sexual relationship). This could explain some of Chris's views regarding sex and romance; he genuinely cannot understand the appeal of most sexual activity, aside from the fact he's seen people in the media do it and that he thinks that sex is something all men need to experience in order to become complete adults.

As the act of sexual intercourse and relationships in general are fairly social activities, it's quite possible that Chris views the act of losing his virginity as something of a rite of passage--something he needs to do in order to validate his own sexuality and prove to the world that he's a capable "adult". Chris also fails to realize that relationships are give and take. Every sweetheart that Chris has had, which eventually turned out to be a troll involved long, received relentless emails and calls in which Chris prattled on and on about how much he "loved" them and how he was looking forward to finally having sex. After supposedly losing his virginity, it's unknown if he still craves sexual intercourse as much as he did before. One thing is still certain, however, is that he still fervently desires the attention of a sweetheart.

After he was introduced to the term by his Mailbag correspondents, Chris took to interpreting and using "asexual" as an insult. In his [[CWCipedia]] page on [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia Page)|The Wallflower]], he referred to her as a "Got-Dang Asexual Woman!". He also became very offended when [[Jackie]] implied that he liked [[video games]] more than women, ranting that she should not label him as asexual (and missed her point completely).<ref name="Jackie E-mails 2" />

However, considering Chris's incessant shoehorning of entirely unnecessary sex into the comics, and the ludicrous efforts he goes to get some [[China]], he does seem to possess sexual desire - though not necessarily for women, as these things could simply be part of his efforts to disprove his much-feared [[homosexuality]].

==Pedophilia==
{{main|Pedofork}}

==Bestiality==
{{quote|I can imagine myself doing it with a [[Patti-chan|collie]] at least. you know, like Lassie.|Chris to [[PandaHalo]]<ref name="collie">[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>}}
[[File:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Run, Patti, run!]]
[[File:Super-mode.jpg|thumb|left|90px|Chris, sporting a [[ECV 00002‎|homemade fursuit]].]]

In [[December 2008]], Chris told [[PandaHalo]] he would be willing to have sex with a female dog for her.<ref name="collie" /> However, in his [[Chris-chan Discusses...‎|interview with ScrewAttackEurope]], Chris says he's against bestiality, then hoists himself by his own petard by claiming that Sonichu & co. are not "half-humans" but "all-animals" with human form; so technically this isn't bestiality, as they're animals having sex with each other.

Chris suggested that Brian from ''[[Family Guy]]'' be paired up with "any sexy breed" of dog.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Family_Guy#Story_of_the_CWC_Episode_for_.22Family_Guy.22 The Family Guy article on CWCipedia]</ref>

In [[The Red-Maned Deer]], Chris recites a poem he wrote about having sex with a deer, but at the end of it states, "This was, in fact, NOT an act of bestiality. For you see, the Red-Maned Deer I have been communicating with and tracking, is really...my lo-my womanly sweetheart, named [[Jacklyn Romy]]."<ref>[[The Red-Maned Deer]]</ref> The fact that the deer is Jackie is obvious, but in spite of this he explicitly stated that it was her at the end.

In a photo of the [[Rental House]] from June 2014, the Chandler minivan bears a bumper sticker reading "I Sleep with Dogs".<ref>[[:File:Chandler Cars 1600w.jpg]]</ref> What exactly this means is yet to be determined.

===Is Chris a furry?===
Whether or not Chris can actually be considered a furry is still debated.<ref>From [[Sarah May Skype Logs#Chris tries to leave|the Sarah May Skype Logs]]: [7:17:25] '''Sarah May''': Did you feel sexually aroused when you drew them? [7:17:34] '''Christopher C.W.C.''': a bit.</ref> There are some things that point in that direction. [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] is in many ways similar to a fursona. Chris has also used the character while cybering with [[Julie]].<ref name="Cums cat" /> Finally, in the [[Giant Penis Comic]], Chris and [[Ivy]] both morph into fursonas during the act of sex. However, it has been confirmed by [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] that Chris is actually prejudiced against furries, not because of who they are, but because many furries tend to be [[homos]].<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Racism and homophobia]]</ref>
{{-}}

==Prostitution==
Given how badly Chris wanted to lose his virginity, many observers have wondered why he didn't immediately spend some of his [[tugboat]] on a prostitute. [[Mumble 4]], from [[February 2009]], answered that question for a while. There, Chris explained that paying for sex would render the act "meaningless," and he was - in a rare display of common sense - afraid of contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

[[Image:Virginbreaker.png|thumb|Chris' leaked [[Facebook]] announcement that he had lost his virginity. Initially igniting a firestorm of controversy, Chris himself let it slip that she was found "somewhere on the backpage" soon after.]]

Needs must as the devil drives, though. While being blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of [[2009]], Chris attempted to solicit the services of a Craigslist prostitute to fuck on camera so he could recover his hacked [[PlayStation Network]] accounts. After describing his personal problems to the prostitute, she hung up on him. Chris was apparently trying to get free sex from the hooker with long, rambling stories about his horrible life to try and gain sympathy. He was genuinely shocked when she didn't offer to fuck him out of pity, unaware that prostitutes, by definition, only have sex with men for money.

Previously, in [[March 2009]], [[Brian Bash]] had sent a trio of prostitutes to [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] so he would no longer be a virgin with rage. [[Hooker incident|Hilarity ensued]].

By the beginning of [[2010]], Chris's views on prostitution had further softened. According to his [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|conversations with Vivian Gee]], around the turn of the year he was attempting to save $100 out of his monthly budget to buy himself a whore for his 28th [[birthday]]. This, presumably, was the "hundred dollars for a damn hooker" he referred to when [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|begging the Wallflower for sex]] on YouTube in [[March 2010]].

Between [[April 2010|April]] and [[July 2010]], under the name of [[Carlos Chantor]], Chris tried to offer himself up as a male escort. He described himself as "[[Chris and reality|Experienced for Her Pleasure]]", with an [[obesity|average]] body type.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref>

Later, under the guise of his troll persona [[JenkinsJinkies]], Chris attempted to acquire the contact details of the hookers Brian Bash had previously hired. While it is possible that Chris merely wished to make his disguise more convincing by implying that 14 year old Jenkins wished to hire prostitutes, it seems far more likely that Chris actually was considering hiring Brian's girls.

In [[April 2012]] a [[Facebook]] status leaked in which Chris announced that he was no longer a virgin. Suspicion arose that this was due to the help of a hooker. Chris provided further evidence suggesting that the girl was a prostitute on 1 [[May 2012|May]] when he wrote in a [[Facebook#Hey, Trollies|Facebook note]] that his virgin breaker can be found "somewhere on the [[Wikipedia:Backpage|backpage]]", a website known for featuring sex service ads.<ref>[http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/19/opinion/kristof-not-quite-a-teen-yet-sold-for-sex.html?_r=1]</ref> On 28/29 June 2014 Chris openly admitted that his first time was with a prostitute, and that he had sex with her twice.<ref>[[Other documents#Chris's wingman]]</ref>

==Incest==
{{incomplete}}

[[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]], Chris's imaginary twin sister, appeared as a [[:image:153-GirlfriendsGift.jpg|"girlfriend" card]] he made for ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'', and her attractiveness and desirability are brought up several times in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] comics well after being established as Chris's twin. Chris has shown complete ignorance in matters incestuous before; his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] are all related, but many of them are paired off with one-another, banging and some even [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|having]] [[Sandy Rosechu|kids]].

Chris first expounded his views on incest to the internet on 31 [[January 2009]] during the [[Mumble 1|first Mumble chat]], when it was revealed that he did not fully understood the meaning of the word "incest". While he showed aversion toward incest in the chat, his condemnation of it was lukewarm, saying that he would only "definitely discourage that" and that lesbian incest is "possibly OK" due to no reproduction being involved. Compare this to his statements about male homosexuality from the same chat ("I hate homo males [...] I'd sooner have a [[Tomgirl Saga|sex change]] before I would ever turn into a homo") or to his statements about male homosexuality from earlier that month, saying that he would make it a crime and force its practitioners into having sex with members of the opposite gender.<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]]</ref>

A year later, Chris's views became staunch. When a correspondent in the [[Mailbag]] pointed out that Chris's state allows cousin marriage but not same-sex marriage, Chris furiously denied it and wrote, "Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN MOTHER OR FATHER!"<ref>[[Common Questions#5 January 2010]]</ref> When another correspondent responded to Chris by saying that he is happily married to his cousin and that their marriage is indeed legal in Virginia, Chris answered him by saying he was destined to hell for his relationship.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#Good luck in hell]]</ref>, not realizing that Incest is shown in a positive light in [[Chris and religion|the Bible]]. When the subject came up again in the next mailbag, Chris said that sexual relations between cousins are just as wrong as incest between parents and their children or between siblings, and that all those relationships were condemned in the "same part" of the Bible, <ref>[[Mailbag 35#I think he wanted a specific verse]]</ref> which is not actually true. <ref> [[http://www.cousincouples.com/?page=religion]]</ref>

===Dreams of sex with Barb===
On 10 August 2016, Chris posted a [[Facebook statuses|response]] to a mother-son couple who were arrested for incest He admitted to "[having] dreams of having sex with my mother" but "Never acting on them ever". Among other things, he also implied that incest "offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s).". All this is in stark contrast to his earlier condemnation of incest, which begs the question about whether Chris was being TRUE and HONEST but changed his opinion later thanks to his growing degeneracy, or the likelier possibility it was [[Hypocrisy|all for show]].
====Transcript====
I have a few things to say in response to this article. Firstly, the child was over 18, and surely the mother has talked it out with him beforehand. The child might have had social problems, or a situation where socializing or going out to socialize with other people, was a Greater Difficulty. Financial situation to prevent paying someone else to come over and help out in the situation. Moreover, it was the lifelong affections between parent and child. Also, the mother probably could not bear any ovum for children anymore.
Anyhow, who among Everyone in this world has not had a dream of having sex with one of their parents? Never acting on them ever, I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with my mother.
Although incest is quite controversial topic, but there are circumstances where there would be not so much harm as one may think, feel or believe. The child is over 18; the mother is unable to have any more children at the time; birth control and protection is available and can be used (in a case of father/daughter, birth control Definitely should be used anyhow). Also, consider if the child is adopted; not as much biological.
Plus, this offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s). The schools can only teach from books; not so much practice. And Nobody wants to end up being a 20 or 30-plus year old Virgin. I know; That is a Huge, Enduring Pain.
Unless the sex act was abusive, hurtful, or Would result in an unwanted birth of a physical or mental challenged child, I would not judge or persecute the parent and child. I would encourage the child to socialize more; maybe make it easier for the child to meet more people his/her age.
Do Not send the mother and son to jail!

==Rape==

{{Protip|Despite your worst fears, Chris won't rape anybody, so stop saying that.}}

Chris is very apathetic about the idea of rape. When [[PandaHalo]] told him she was raped by [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]], he reacted nonchalantly. He even thought it would be appropriate for Panda to move in with her rapist, whom he called a "good man" for regretting the rape and for being willing to take care of the ensuing child.<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref> Later on, long after the PandaHalo saga was over, he would wish her and her rapist a happy marriage.<ref>[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)#Sarah Cassandra McKenzie, A.K.A. PandaHalo]]</ref> In [[iPods Down and Listen Up]], he doesn't seem to realize that his improvised lyrics detail a sexual act that would almost certainly be construed by others as rape. More recently, he has taken to comparing his ordeals with the trolls to rape in his Facebook posts.

As far as ''Chris'' being a potential rapist is concerned, during a particularly [[IRC (23 July 2009)|disturbing chat]], he ([[:File:BillRiley.jpg|incognito]]) suggested that the trolls try to convince him to rape [[Rocky Shoemaker]].

In all likelihood, though, these parts of his behavior are most likely explained by the keys to understanding his behavior overall: his ignorance about the world and his persecution complex causes him to be quite [[naïve]] about how bad rape actually is. With the Rocky situation above, he likely said that as part of an odd, roundabout scheme to get the trolls arrested, but it's still pretty fucked up that he'd even suggest something like this, let alone tell her about it after.

Chris has a surprisingly mature moral opinion on the subject of abortion in cases of rape; in one of the [[Kacey Calls]], he states he believes that abortion in these cases should be the choice of the victim only and that they should not be pressured by others in their decision.

One might assume that he will one day try to rape someone due to this mindset and stalker tendencies, but this scenario is highly unlikely. For instance, he tried to kiss [[Emily]] and gave up when she said no,<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#A precious farewell (1:29:35–1:31:10)]]</ref> showing that he does understand the importance of consent....or at least, he ''used'' to. Unfortunately, it seems that as of 2014, he has decided that he won't take "no" for an answer, and basically ''molested'' [[Catherine#The Date|Catherine during their second outing]] by hugging her and burying his head in her breasts even after she flatly told him not to. This gets even more disturbing when you consider [[Catherine E-mails#It IS Your Fault!|this e-mail]], where Chris outright says that he's [[Chris and his Ego|"entitled to a relationship"]].

He also doesn't have a history of violence (indeed, quite, quite the opposite), and aside from his [[Death threats#Likelihood of Acting Out on Death Threats|habit of dishing out threats he can't possibly carry out]], Chris is physically [[Chris and health|very weak and unfit]], and simply could not overpower an able-bodied person - the only outcome of him attempting it would be a swift knee to the [[duck]] followed by a rousing round of [[Kick the Autistic|America's favorite game]]. However, given Catherine's experience with Chris during their outing (in her words, she was taken by surprise and couldn't react to it), potential sweethearts should still exercise some caution around him.

Interestingly, Chris details in [[Announcement 06292016]] that he wants all men to stay an arm's length distance away from him. Along with showing the insecurities he possesses concerning men, Chris seems to think that he is [[Tomgirl|female]] enough or [[Chris and his ego|attractive]] enough that [[Chris and reality|a man would want to rape him.]]

==Sexting==

<strike>[http://www.4shared.com/photo/ofavvePXce/Chris_Chan_Sexting.html Sexting Coversation]</strike> Link down. Please reupload.

==See also==
*[[Chris and his Ego]]
*[[Chris Sex Logs]]
*[[Duck]]
*[[Homos]]
*[[Mass debating]]
*[[Naive]]
*[[Pickle]]
*[[Semen]]
*[[ShecameforCWC.JPG]]
*[[Women's rights]]

== References ==
<references/>

{{Love quest}}
{{Chris and}}

Pmurt

2016-11-15T00:17:29Z

MindHit: typo

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{quote|Plus, Trump is just too damn rich And [[Chris|immature]]. And "Trump" spelled backwards is "Pmurt", which rhymes with "Hurt", and he would badly "Pmurt" this country in office.|[[Chris]]}}

{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | [[File:Trump.jpg]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Donald Trump
|-
| '''Nicknames'''
| Pmurt [[$50 for a video holiday greeting!|A Mean One]]
|-
| '''Date of Birth'''
| 14 July 1946 (age {{Age|1946|6|14}})
|-
| '''Gender'''
| [[Jerk|Male]]
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| [[Chris and race|White]]
|-
| '''Occupation(s)'''
| President-elect of the United States Businessman
|-
|}

'''Pmurt''' is a [[CWC-ism]] for 2016 Republican President-elect '''[[wikipedia:Donald Trump|Donald Trump]]'''. He initially pronounced it '''Murt''', based on his opinion that the P is silent when the name is said backwards<ref>[[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt]]</ref>, however in [[Eid, Pmurt, Eid]], he pronounced the P.

On 8 November 2016, Chris participated in the US presidential election and voted for Hillary Clinton<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Chris and Barb vote for Hillary]]</ref>. In the early morning hours of 9 November, following news that Pmurt had won the election, Chris reacted by making multiple death threats against him.

==Meaning of the name==
This CWC-ism comes from a [[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote|Facebook comment from 25 September]] (partially quoted above), in which Chris says that "Trump spelled backwards is "Pmurt", [[Random Access Humor|which rhymes with hurt, and that Trump would badly "Pmurt" the US if elected.]]".

Reversing Trump’s name has twofold meanings. Firstly, names are particularly sacred to Chris<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref><ref>[[To Clyde Gregg]]</ref><ref>[[Exposing Jeff]]</ref>; in his eyes, mocking anyone's name will severely degrade them — this article will establish that Chris has enormous distain for Donald Trump. Secondly, Chris has historically assumed that saying anything backwards induces subliminal stimuli<ref>[[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L]]</ref> — which he believe are enormously influential on the psyche ''and'' the physical body<ref>[[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis]]</ref>. Therefore, Chris may believe reversing Trump's name, in a negative context, might effectively alter his audience's perception of him. Beyond the random-access humor, Chris probably thinks his rendition of Trump’s name is a serious presidential objection for everyone to consider.

Chris continued using this backwards name in subsequent Facebook posts and videos.

==Chris's news sources==
On Facebook, Chris routinely browses pages on LGBTQ culture, such as Lizzy the Lezzy. In the wake of the 2016 election, many of those pages became inundated with articles written with a clear anti-Pmurt angle. Chris forms and reinforces his opinions on Pmurt based on those articles, rating many of them "Angry."

Examples of the pages Chris reacted to can be seen [https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot-www-facebook-com-2016-11-13-05-02-12-png.153431/ here] and [https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot-www-facebook-com-2016-11-13-19-08-04-png.153440/ here].

It's likely that Chris simply skims headlines or opening paragraphs. The second example was taken one hour after Chris posted to [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Hate and fear of Trump and Pence|a Lizzy the Lezzy comments section]]<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-11-13-chris-hates-and-fears-trump-and-pence.25777/page-2#post-1878273</ref>; given that he was also busy with responding to its readers, it is impossible for him to have thoroughly read the articles.

==Opposition to Pmurt==
Chris is opposed to Pmurt becoming President for the following reasons:

*He "[[Chris and Hypocrisy|is very spiteful]]."<ref>[[July 2016 Facebook posts#Christine's Driver's License and Woman's Card]]</ref>
*He is an "[[Chris|immature brat]] who mocks everyone."<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote]]</ref>
*He "Wants [[Chris and race|the immigrants to build their own "Keep Out" wall so [he] would kick them all out]]."
*He "hates our kind." [[homos|[LGBTQ]]]
*He "was a [[Autism|one-track tape]], [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|repeating himself]] [[Honor Roll|on pat [sic] deeds]] [[CADD|that he was "proud"(?)]] of."<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#"Thoughts" on the debate]]</ref>
*He has "ideals of [[Chris and money|cutting finances]] from all of the more important resources the country needs in communities and feeding the industries from the National Debt. And he acted against the immigrants in that topic as well; [[Monthly Tugboat|they have to work too, you know.]]"
*He will not give Chris a bigger tugboat. In November 2016, Chris said, "Trump will ONLY make the Country go BROKE, as Groening predicted, and [[Chris and Money#Bank lawsuits against Barb|ALL the money will ONLY go to his own debtors]] and the Fat Cat Rich People, and [[Financhu Crisis|Hardly ANY for us in the middle class and below]]" and "Hillary will Tax the Fat Cats and fill the middle class and lower and get the country less in debt."<ref>[[Misc E-mails#Anti-Pmurt]]</ref>
*He "[[Gal Pal E-mails 4#OkCupid - She's overweight and unappealing|puts down Women VERY BAD.]]"<ref>[[Misc E-mails#Anti-Pmurt]]</ref>
*He is a [[Jerk|male]]. In February 2016, Chris said, "I feel like American needs a woman's touch finally after all these years"<ref>[[Update 02/16/2016]]</ref> as a reason for why he wanted Hillary Clinton [[Women's Rights|to become president.]]
*He is "[[Chris and Reality|Not Valid to be president.]]"<ref>[[Misc E-mails#Anti-Pmurt]]</ref>

Chris has also [[Honor Roll|cited an episode of The Simpsons]] as one of his major sources for being anti-Pmurt<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote]]</ref>.

Interestingly, both Pmurt and Chris [[Megan|have been accused of sexual harassment]].

==Anti-Pmurt petitions==
Chris has signed online petitions as an effort to prevent Pmurt from assuming the presidency.

*[https://act.credoaction.com/sign/russell_amendment A petition opposing the "anti-LGBTQ Russell Amendment"]

Pmurt had nothing to do with creating this amendment. The author of the petition still decided to mention Pmurt, however, saying, "On January 20, Donald Trump and Mike Pence are going to enter the White House.

They campaigned on a platform of hatred, bigotry, racism, misogyny, and xenophobia. Pence in particular has a history of passing policies that demonstrate his fear and hatred of LGBTQ people. There is no denying that this is a devastating blow to our communities."

*[https://www.change.org/p/electoral-college-electors-electoral-college-make-hillary-clinton-president-on-december-19 A petition calling on the Electoral College to disregard the election and install Hillary Clinton into the presidency]

Chris signed it on the hopes that, on December 19th, the Electoral College will "ignore" the results of the 2016 Presidential election, based on the fact that Clinton is winning the popular vote. This is not likely to happen, as Trump commands a significant lead over Clinton in terms of electoral votes, leading 290-218.

[[Image:Feelings of the election results (720p 30fps H264-192kbit AAC).mp400001.png|thumb|Chris, wishing for Donald Trump's death]]

==Death Threats==
Chris's hatred of Pmurt is so great that he made four videos of himself role-playing acts of violence on Pmurt with ''[[Transformers]]'', ''[[My Little Pony]]'' and ''[[Lego]]'' toys.<ref>[[September 2016 Paid Video Requests#Paid Message to the Trolls]]</ref><ref>[[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt]]</ref>, including one where he destroyed a Transformers toy<ref>[[Eid, Pmurt, Eid‎‎]]</ref>, further showing his lack of [[chris and money|financial]] [[Financhu Crisis|sense]].

'''Timeline'''

On November 9, 2016, Chris made several enraged [[death threats]] against the President-elect. He continued his tirade the next day, in spite of the possibility that it could land him in serious legal trouble. According to [http://uscode.house.gov/view.xhtml?path=/prelim@title18/part1/chapter41&edition=prelim United States code], a threat against the President-elect is punishable by a fine and/or a maximum of five years in prison.

'''9 November'''

*3:28 am - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Chris wants Trump assassinated|posts on Facebook]] that he wants someone to assassinate Trump with a sniper rifle. Chris's Twitter account automatically tweets the post. Throughout the day, many [[Chris in the media#Death threats against Trump|high-profile Twitter users]] retweet the post. Several Twitter users say that they reported him to the FBI and Secret Service.<ref>http://archive.is/bHnGQ</ref>

*3:39 am - Chris [[Eid, Pmurt, Eid|uploads a YouTube video]] depicting him smashing a ''Transformers'' toy in effigy of Trump, while screaming "die!"

*3:40 am - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Eid, Pmurt, Eid!!!|posts on Facebook]] again. He links to the YouTube video and says Trump "should Die now" before taking office. The post is also tweeted by his Twitter account.

*5:15 am - The "sniper rifle" death threat disappears from Facebook<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-calls-for-the-assassination-of-our-dear-leader.25664/page-4#post-1865911</ref>.

*8:30 am - An Infowars.com [http://www.infowars.com/hillary-supporters-burn-american-flag-riot-threaten-to-kill-trump-after-losing-election/ article], featuring Chris's death threat in tweet form, is published.

*11 pm - The same threat disappears from Twitter<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-calls-for-the-assassination-of-our-dear-leader.25664/page-14#post-1869300</ref>.

'''10 November'''
*4:07 am - Chris [[Twitter#10 November 2016.1|tweets]] the Infowars article.

*4:23 am - Chris [[Twitter#10 November 2016.2|tweets]] that he wants his audience to join him in wishing death to President-elect Trump before January 2017.

*6:53 pm - Chris again [[Twitter#10 November 2016.3|tweets]] to pray for Trump's death. He also prays for Vice President-elect Mike Pence's death. He then links to [https://act.credoaction.com/sign/russell_amendment a petition] from Credo Action, concerning the "anti-LGBTQ Russell Amendment."

'''13 November'''
*2:06 am - Chris [[Feelings of the election results|uploads a YouTube video]] in which he uses Legos to role-play Mike Pence murdering Trump and getting arrested. He then holds up a sheet of paper, with the handwritten words (backwards and facing himself):

<center>{{quotebox|(Before January 2017) Die, Trump, die, or by illness, by Mike Pence's hand.}}</center>

*2:36 am - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Feelings of the election results|posts on Facebook]] about being annoyed by leftover Trump/Pence campaign signs. It is unknown whether or not Chris will [[Sonic Boom Protests|take down the signs himself]].

*5:06 am - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Feelings of the election results|posts on Facebook]], linking to the Infowars article. He then tries to justify his behavior by saying, "I'm not the only one who wants him dead."

*9:17 pm - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Hate and fear of Trump and Pence|posts]] to the Lizzy the Lezzy comment section, asking the readers to pray for Trump and Pence's deaths "before Thanksgiving." Many people respond, trying to talk sense into him, to no avail.

'''14 November'''
*12:53 pm - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Lego Trump and Pence hanged at the gallows|posts a picture to Facebook]] depicting Lego versions of Trump and Pence being executed by hanging, while handcuffed. The text on the photo reads:

<center>{{quotebox|Die, Trump, Die. Die, Pence, Die.

We do not want either of you in office; jail for you both is unlikely; We, the LGBTQ community, do not want to lose our protection and rights}}</center>

His Facebook friends try to talk him out of his behavior, but, as with the Lizzy the Lezzy crowd from the previous day, Chris is not persuaded.

Chris follows up by commenting that, since prison is "unlikely" and impeachment is "difficult" then "Death upon those two before January, 2017, at this time and point is a necessary evil."

*3:07 pm - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#I'm done adulting|posts]], saying "[[Chris and reality|Trump is Not president, mayor, or Anything in Cwcville.]]"

==See Also==
* [[Chris and English]]
* [[Death Threats]]

==Sources==
<references/>
{{People}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]
[[Category:Stubs]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

Financhu Crisis

2016-09-04T16:03:01Z

MindHit: Added links to Cole Smithey's article

The '''Financhu Crisis''' is a term coined by users from Kiwi Farms to describe the steep decline in the Chandler family's financial management beginning in early 2016.

There is a sharp increase in begging videos and Facebook posts from Chris and Barb. Their financial woes are caused by their own behaviors, as during this time, Chris purchased over $1,000 worth of toys, while both Chris and Barb had court cases resolved which involved, respectively, pepper-spraying an innocent Gamestop employee and failing to pay a debt to Discover Bank.

Prior to the Financhu Crisis, Chris would solicit donations for his Etsy shop, while offering Sonichu crafts in exchange. As the Crisis set in, Chris no longer offered anything in exchange, resorting to straight begging.

Chris has not attempted to get a job.

March:
*1st - Chris buys a PS4, worth $540, from Fingerhut (using a credit card)<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/internet-detective-proves-chris-bought-the-ps4-himself.18249/</ref>.
*16th - Barb is found guilty in a debt case involving Discover Bank. The judgement states that she owes $4,706.93<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/barb-sued-by-discover-bank.18379/page-28#post-1324090</ref>.
*19th - Chris spends $425 on a single Lego set<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/</ref>.

April:
*12th - [[Please, Donate|Chris begs]]. This video is notable for being the first video devoted to asking for money.
*24th - [[Donation Request|Chris begs]] again, this time without offering crafts in exchange.

May:
*4th - The donations listing on Chris's Etsy shop is removed, presumably for violating TOS<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/fb-4-29-chris-is-excited-about-ratchet-clank-totes-swag.20150/page-10#post-1434759</ref>.
*9th - Chris spends $60 on his [[waifu|waifu]].
*23rd - [[Donations, Please, plus Live Game Stream tonight.|Chris begs]] for bananas. He also [[Live Game Stream - Uncharted|announces]] the debut of a Support button on his Youtube channel to replace the Etsy listing.
*25th - Chris begs [[May 2016 Facebook posts#Etsy listing removal|in a Facebook post]] while reminding readers that Etsy removed his donation listing and that he has a Support button on Youtube instead.
*26th - Chris begs [[May 2016 Facebook posts#Uncharted video and donations|on Facebook]], links to his game stream of Uncharted and repeats his statements from the 25th.
*28th - Chris spends nearly $100 on Transformers<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/</ref>.
*29th - Chris spends another $30 on his waifu<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-8#post-1498444</ref>.
*31st - Chris spends $150 more on Transformers<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-6#post-1496692</ref>.

June:
*8th - Chris's Etsy shop is closed<ref>[[Etsy#Shop Closure]]</ref>, presumably for failing to send orders.
*11th - [[Cwcville Shopping is on Vacation|Chris begs]] for money in the same video in which he announces that his shop is closed. Starting from this video, Chris adds his begging to the video descriptions.
*14th - Chris begs to have $100 for Barb's asthma medicine, in [[Donations Required, Serious. Please help|two]] [[Donations Requested, Please|videos]] which feature Barb.
*17th - [[Reading "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness" Chapter 1|Chris begs]] to have $200 for an electric bill, while reading a fanfic called "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness".
*19th - [[Reading "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness" Chapter 2|Chris begs]], again saying he wants $200 for an electric bill, and also wanting food money, while reading another chapter of Bluebird.
*19th - Chris wants to become a [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|prostitute]], in an attempt to get both money and china.
*26th - Chris begs his half-brother [[Cole Smithey|Cole Smithey]] for financial help, while simultaneously insulting him for "pissing and burning" the money he earns from working as a movie critic on apartment rent<ref>[[June 2016 Facebook posts#O brother, where art thou?]]</ref>.
*29th - [[Announcement 06292016|Chris begs]], saying that even though he got donations, he wants more because "we could still do better," before reading the third chapter of Bluebird.

July:
*1st - Chris pays his $541 court costs for pepper-spraying a Gamestop employee in 2014<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/7-1-chris-paid-his-court-costs.22142/</ref>.
*8th - [[Rainbows Unicorns and a Bluebird of Happiness Chapter 4|Chris begs]] while reading chapter four of Bluebird.
*9th - [[Announcement 20160709|Chris begs]] in a long rant, saying he is stressed from dealing with finances. He mentions a mortgage among the bills. He wants food money for himself, Barb and their pets.
*10th-11th - [[HELP, PLEASE!!!|Chris begs]] in a series of four videos, wanting $20 or $50. He demeans himself on camera to get people to donate. Finally, he thanks people for sending the "minimum $20" before begging to have money for Barb's teeth.
*13th - [[Donations Further Requested, Please|Barb begs]] to have money for her dental work.
*13th - Chris finally decides to sell some of his toys to raise money. He lists one Pokemon card on eBay for $50.<ref>[[July 2016 Facebook posts#Chris Offers a Pokemon Card for Sale]]</ref>
*14th - Chris lists two more Pokemon cards on eBay, for $100 each.
*15th - Chris begs for food money in a [[July 2016 Facebook posts#"I'm not on drugs!"|Facebook post]], complaining that people aren't willing to donate anymore.
*18th - [[Update 20160718|Chris begs]] for money in the same video in which he reads an anniversary dedication, while expecting to be paid $50 for it.
*18th - One of the $100 Pokemon cards Chris listed on eBay is sold<ref>http://offer.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewBidsLogin&item=282101638696</ref>.
*20th-22nd - Chris produces [[Paid Video Requests|eight videos]] to earn money from his fanbase.
*23rd - Chris returns to begging [[July 2016 Facebook posts#2 Strikes on Youtube|on Facebook]]. He also announces that "this window is for Donations Only. No video requests until further notice," after his Youtube account receives its second strike against it for violating policy on "nudity or sexual content" after [[Paid Video Requests#Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Shake my boobies|a video]] he uploaded on the 22nd got reported. He also begs to a Kiwi Farms user named crayolasword who asks him about the situation.
<center><gallery>
File:Cwc-crayolasword-stitched.png
</gallery></center>
*24th - Chris announces [[July 2016 Facebook posts#I have grown a labia!|on Facebook]] that he has grown a labia using subliminal frequencies found on Youtube. He also requests donations for gender reassignment.
*26th - Three days after being barred from uploading videos to his CwcvilleGuardian Youtube account, Chris circumvents the ban by [[Paid Video Request Reminder|uploading to another account]], restarting the Paid Video Requests program and accepting offers for $10-$50.
*28th - Chris makes one sale on the video program.

August:
<center><gallery>
File:Barb capitalone.png|Capital One Bank vs Barb
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>
*4th - Barb is sued by yet another bank. The hearing will take place on September 14th.
*5th - Chris pays $121 in court costs and fines for failing to acquire proper certifications for his dogs.
*5th - Chris begs for donations in [[August 2016 Facebook posts#House Cleaning|a Facebook post]] and asks for tubes of [[Oestrogel application and Vibrating Bra, How To.|Oestrogel]] to be sent to him.
*9th - Chris relists the Birthday Pikachu card on eBay for $500 and begs people to "Buy It Now and help me and my family."<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Buy this $3,000 VHS tape]]</ref> He also offers a VHS tape of Aladdin for $3,000.<ref>http://www.ebay.com/itm/282128626463</ref>
*11th - Chris begs [[Cole Smithey|Cole Smithey]] for financial help again, this time by saying, "Hey! Cole!!! Get off of your ass and apologize and make peace with us here, In Person, and Help Us Financially, Please."<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts|Get off your ass, Cole!]]</ref>
*31st - Chris begs his audience [[August 2016 Facebook posts#Who wants to pay our mortgage?!|on Facebook]] to pay his mortgage of $115,000.

==Sources==
<references/>
[[Category:Sagas]]
[[Category:Things bought with taxpayer money]]

2014 house fire

2016-02-07T01:11:11Z

MindHit: Linking to the confirmation of Scamper's death

{{Articleofthenow}}

{{Quote|FIRE! 2:00 AM. [[Jerkop|911]] arrived ten minutes later. Did everything they could; started downstairs; [[Mass debating|bathroom]]; electrical; made it to the roof. Considering EVERYTHING, but [[Barbara Chandler|my mom]], [[Clover and Snoopy|both dogs]], [[Chris|me]], and [[Chandler Cats|Lucy]] and my [[iDea Book Case|iPhone]], shoes, clothes, whatnot on our backs made it out... Considered physically lost.|Chris, 10 January 2014}}

On 10 January 2014, [[14 Branchland Court]], [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville, Virginia]] was devastated by '''an early morning fire'''. Chris first mentioned it on [[Facebook]], and it was confirmed later that day when [[Charlottesville]]'s local CBS affiliate WCAV-TV broadcast a brief news report on the incident.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Fire at 14 Branchland Court
| video = {{#ev:youtube|qkYnMRh26Oo}}
}}

==The Fire==
Shortly after the fire, leaked emails and Facebook posts from Chris helped set up his version of the timeline of events that fateful night. Naturally, what we heard from Chris and what was written in the official fire report obtained months later were quite different. Chris initially claimed that the fire started around 2:00 A.M.; however, the official report states that the 911 call wasn't received until 2:44 A.M. This is in line with what WCAV reported as well.

===Chris's Timeline of Events===
*'''2:00 EST''': According to Chris, this was approximately when the fire began.
*'''2:00-2:10''': Chris claimed that a fire extinguisher was present or was retrieved, and that there was an attempt to extinguish the fire, which ultimately failed. After the failed attempt to extinguish the fire, Chris evacuated the household, along with Barbara and the Chandler pets. Sometime during this period, emergency services were called.
*'''2:10''': Local firefighters arrive at the scene.

===Actual Timeline of Events===
[[File:14 Branchland Court on Fire - Copy.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris's house on fire. This photo is believed to have been taken around 4:00 A.M., more than an hour after the fire started.]]
The official fire report states that Chris's 911 call was actually [[Chris and reality|received at 2:44 A.M.]] and that fire personnel were on scene about 15 minutes later. WCAV stated the fire started around 3:00am. Almost immediately, the fire department asked for additional support to help fight the fire. The fire was put out by 6 A.M., and the scene was cleared by 7:00 A.M.

*'''2:45''': Dispatch tones 4 fire stations (Dyke, Ruckersville, Standardsville Fire, and Greene County Rescue Squad.) Dispatch relays "Fire in the downstairs bathroom."
*'''3:01''': Dispatcher relays that a lot of smoke is coming from the basement and flames are visible at the top of the steps.
*'''3:01''': Engine 11 requests Orange Company provide additional manpower.
*'''3:05''': Engine 21 is on scene and reports heavy smoke.
*'''3:06''': Engine 11 is on scene.
*'''3:13''': BVille (Burtonville?) Fire has been called for support.
*'''3:37''': Command requests dispatch contact the power company.
*'''3:45''': The fire has been burning for at least an hour at this point.
*'''3:47''': Station 2 is called for additional manpower.
*'''3:53''': Station 1 is called for additional manpower.
*'''4:05''': Heavy fire coming through roof.
*'''4:07''': Command requests Hollymead for additional manpower.
*'''4:45''': The fire has been burning for about two hours at this point.
*'''4:47''': Madison County contacted for additional personnel.
*'''5:00''': Rescue 401 leaves scene to transport one patient (Probably the injured firefighter) to Martha Jefferson Hospital.
*'''5:22''': Chris first breaks the news about the house fire on Facebook. He commented twice on the post in quick succession, lamenting the loss of personal belongings and the memories of his home, as well as stating he was able to salvage his mother's medication and his wallet. At the time of the posting, he was boarding with a generous neighbor.
*'''5-57-7:11''': All the remaining units on-scene are cleared to return to their stations.
*'''7:10''': Chris posted an angry comment on [[Wikipedia:Keurig|Keurig]]'s Facebook page, producer of the coffee brewer, blaming faulty wiring in the product for creating the spark that created the fire. Chris then admitted to operating the coffee brewer within the bathroom after responding to a comment from his friend [[William Elliott Waterman]], who vainly tried to calm Chris down and not seek vengeance so soon after the fire.
*'''Later''': An e-mail from Chris is released giving more information about the event. It is revealed that Chris and Barbara were allowed to enter the house and retrieve [[Lego|necessities]] for living from the house, and are currently receiving [[Rental House|accommodation]] from their insurer while investigation and "repairs" are conducted.

<center>{{collapsible
|Fire Report
|<gallery perrow="5">
File:FireReport001.jpg
File:FireReport002.jpg
</gallery>}}</center>

There is no official word as to the cause of the fire, but the person who leaked the above fire report documents claims that it was caused by a spark from an extension cord run through the bathroom door, the plastic coating of which had worn away.<ref>http://cwckiforums.com/threads/fire-report-docs.4849/#post-337450</ref> Chris admitted to [[Catherine]] that he was using an extension cord in the bathroom to plug in a Keurig coffee maker located in an adjacent room. The cord was looped over the top of the door, and the friction caused by the motion of the door had abraded the cord, starting the fire. Chris claimed that the brewer was off when the fire started, although he admitted that [[Honor roll|it wasn't unplugged]]. Why the Chandlers had an extension cord running out of the bathroom to plug in a coffee maker is anyone's guess, but it probably has something to do with Barb's hoarding. It is worth noting that in [[Tour of Chris's House II|Chris's recent video tour of his home]], coffee cups are spotted around his bathroom sink, suggesting that the bathroom has become the primary source of water. Said video also shows the blatant fire hazard that was his home, with piles of paper and plastic inside a barely standing structure of dry wood.

==Victims and survivors==
Chris reports that he, his mother, and his pets Clover, Snoopy and Lucy escaped the blaze unharmed. Unfortunately, one of his cats was killed in the blaze, and was discovered by the cleaners. Chris buried it in the backyard. It was initially unknown whether it was Scamper or Kitty, until [[CatKnight Interview 3|February 2016]] when Chris confirmed [[Chandler_Cats#Scamper|Scamper]] was the one who had died due to smoke inhalation. It's unknown what happened to the other cat before the fire, but it is likely that this death gives Chris nowhere near as much pain as the death of [[Patti Chandler|Patti]] did.

According to the news report, one of the firefighters suffered minor, unspecified injuries while putting out the fire. Considering how difficult it had been for Chris to navigate his junk-ridden hallways, it is likely that, in the rush to fight the fire, one firefighter may have tripped over the clutter or initiated an avalanche of [[navy]]-coated bric-a-bracs. Chris told Catherine and Al that firefighters were unable to enter the house through either door because of the hoard, and had to climb in through windows.

=== Firefighters ===
Unlike the local police departments of Greene County, Chris has historically been ambivalent towards firefighters. However, in the aftermath of the house fire, Chris and his mother both apparently blame the "greedy firefighters" for the absence of some of their personal possessions (which included a cheap knock-off painting and Barb's purse), effectively accusing them of theft. This information was revealed in an [[Misc_E-mails#Greedy_Firefighter|email]] leak after the incident. Insinuating that one of the brave and selfless firefighters who saved his home openly [[Chris and his Ego|stole from him]], especially when there were no grounds whatsoever for his implications, was a new low even for Chris. Once again, Chris showed complete ingratitude for anyone who tries to help him. Only time will tell if the Ruckersville Fire Department will again play a major part in Chris's pathetic life.

==Extent of destruction==
[[File:14305011100_debcde366f_b.jpg|thumb|Photo of the melted Lego Manchester High School, taken within the house on 11 Jan 2014.]]

It can be rightfully assumed that the Chandlers escaped with little more than the clothes on their backs. Chris wrote that he was able to save his wallet, Barb's medication, some clothes and shoes, and his iPhone (as shown in [[Brushfire Video|a later video uploaded through YouTube Capture]]). Soon after the fire, Chris was also observed on [[Miiverse]], not to mention he eventually bought ''Super Mario Maker'', heavily implying that he managed to save his Wii U and possibly at least one of his [[3DS]]'s. He could of also acquired another Wii U, but this is unlikely. He was also seen on his PSN, showing that he either still had his [[PS3]], or that he promptly acquired another. He even had his old [[PSEye]].

In a [[Reaching Out to Game Developers.|video]] uploaded on 19 [[November 2015]], Chris shows off his [[Scrapbook of Fail]], confirming the fire did not destroy all of the original [[Sonichu]] comics and artwork.

Chris stated on Facebook that everything else was "considered physically lost." However, he later revealed to Catherine that his mother had rented a storage unit to hold items which had been recovered from the house. Al and Catherine also noted that the rental house was piled high with boxes and trash. As is typical of hoarders, Barb probably decided that much that was burned or water-damaged was actually salvageable.

A troll visited the house two days after the fire, and found that while the exterior structure of the house appeared largely intact, there was apparently sufficient damage to the roof that it had to be covered over with plastic cladding. Some of the exterior wood paneling had also warped and twisted, presumably due to being near where the fire was burning at its strongest, though due to the house's exact layout being unknown, it's hard to say where exactly this was. The house's windows had been boarded over (as is standard in house fires of this kind), making it impossible to get any exact details on the house's interior condition.

It is unclear to what extent Chris's personal possessions survived the flames. The [[Lego]] [[Manchester High School|High School]] escaped only partially melted, and he was able to use some of the smoky pieces to reconstruct the structure. He also employed his creative [[geinus]] to build an [[ReBrick#Billboard Person from Melting Chaos|original sculpture]] out of the damaged pieces. Two copies of his [[Manchester High School|high school]] yearbooks survived, albeit with smoke and water damage. At least one of his [[Pixelblocks]] creations and a [[medallion]] survived. In reply to a comment on his [[eBay]] auction of his autographed photos, Chris confirmed that the [[Chris and fashion|"Classic" shirt]] was lost in the flames. He also confirmed that his Nintendo GameCube was a goner as well. No word yet on [[the Wall of Originals]], Chris's other [[Chris and art|art]], the [[Crumple-Lope]], the [[Megatron pistol]], the [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|''Sailor Moon'' poster]], the portal to [[CWCville]], the [[Attraction Sign]]s, the [[Heart Torch of Fail|Heart Torch]], and the [[Plush Breasts]].

Over his year in exile, Chris bought multiple Lego sets to replace those lost. He also bought uncut ''Sailor Moon'' DVDs to replace the ones he gifted to Megan some seven years prior.

During the video [[Lesbian Sleepover Party Announcement.]], one of the oldest Christorical artifacts, the [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] totem/figure from Chris's [[Graduation]], was shown to have survived the fire.

==Aftermath and reaction==
In one of the most interesting and significant events regarding [[Chris]]'s <s>fan</s>trollbase, a care package was put together from online donations, initially pooling a few hundred dollars in a matter of hours. The total amount in donations was worth almost a thousand American dollars<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/fire-relief-fund.2855/page-12#post-169127</ref> and consisted of basic necessities with a few amenities thrown in (markers, paints and modeling stuff).

After being sent an incident occurred when a [[weening|troll]] used the tracking number that was posted on the Internet to have the package returned midway. The package was eventually held at a post office in [[Charlottesville]] and withdrew by the Chandlers. Chris made a polite [[Facebook]] post about it in which he expressed his distaste for the [[CWCki]]. A note was sent alongside the goods:

<blockquote>Hey Chris!

Your Sonichu friends have heard about the house fire, and to help you out we put together a care package as CWC as we could! In a few days, 34 donated and collected over $900 towards getting this stuff out to you!
Since your bathroom is where it started, I’ve focused on buying toiletries and hygienic stuff to keep you clean and healthy as you recover from the damages. I could not spend all the money collected, so I’ve also included a money order for $500 that you should give to your mother. She can cash it out and buy whatever you guys need to keep chugging. Don’t forget to get something nice for your pets, too!

I know you often feel that life is hopeless, but there’s good in the world and in people. I hope this package helps you see that. No person on the Internet can ever take away your right to be happy. You must find reasons to enjoy life, even when there are enemies trying to bring you down.

I’ve included some arts and crafts to help you take your mind off things. I think your fans would really like to see what you come up with, because it’s been a very long time since we’ve seen anything new from you. Try to create something that makes you happy and that you can be proud of.

Good luck with everything, Chris. Keep hate out of your heart and look forward to each day.
We will be around if you need us.
</blockquote>

<center><gallery>
[[File:Example.jpg]]
Carepackage box.jpg|Care package.
carepackage_contents.jpg|Its contents.
carepackage_letter.jpg|Note.
carepackage_facebook.png|Chris's update on Facebook.
</gallery></center>

A note by Chris that was posted on the website of the [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]] attest that the church had also provided donations to the Chandlers in response to the house fire.<ref>[https://archive.is/9iIi1#selection-343.0-347.9 Thanks to All from the Chandlers]</ref>

==The Return of Chris's House==
On 3 [[December 2014]], Chris announced that 14 Branchland Court was being reconstructed, and by [[January 2015]] he was safely moved back in. Between those dates, however, he was forced to briefly stay at [[26 December 2014|Albemarle Regional Jail]].

==See also==
* [[January 2014 Facebook Posts]] - Facebook posts Chris posted about the house fire.
* [[Misc E-mails]] - E-mails exchanged between Chris and his classmates about the house fire.
* [[Rental House]] - The Chandlers' temporary household after the incident.

==References==
<references/>

[[Category:Chris's house]]

CatKnight Interview 3

2016-02-07T01:01:04Z

MindHit: Added another link when Arthur mentions the 2014's fire

<div class="#0033ff" id="incomplete">
{| cellpadding="0" cellspacing="4" style="background-color: #ffff88; border: 2px solid #00B7EB; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"
|-
| [[Image:Stress.jpg|120px| ]]
| '''Chris section is still yet to be completed due to [[stress]].'''We get a lot of stressful torture in our lives that makes us crash into slumber. Given that inspiration is a big variable, and we may have been lacking of it, this section will be completed as soon as possible, and more images added, at our own pace...''[[HONEST]]!''
|-
|}</div>


[[CatKnight Interview 2|After two successful interviews]], [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] fan CatKnight/Master Disaster aka Sir Arthur Spatchcock, '''interviewed''' our favorite [[Honest Content|TRUE and HONEST]] Christine Weston Chandler for a third time on 2 February 2016.

== Highlights ==

Good ole Sir Arthur Spatchcock asked questions about some information about Chris's past he and his associates found here on the CWCki, such as the [[BlueSpike]] incident, death of Chris's pet cat [[Chandler_Cats#Scamper|Scamper]], etc. Chris also performs his nightmare fuel [[Donald Duck impersonation]], and states he once received a Tupperware full of horse manure. The two then discuss a bit of business and Mr. Spatchcock suggest Chris do a demonstration of his incredible voice acting with his [[Sonichu Amiibo|Sonichu Amiibo]] and himself.

==Transcript==
'''Arthur:''' Hello, Christine? 
'''Chris:''' Yes, hello Arthur. 
'''Arthur:''' Oh, how are you doing today? 
'''Chris:''' I'm alright. 
'''Arthur:''' Fantastic— 
'''Chris:''' Al—alright—let's get down to the, uh, what are your new quesitons, what are your inquiries? 
'''Arthur:''' Well, yes, my associate has spent the last few days unfortunately looking over the C-W-C-I-K-I, what was it called again? 
'''Chris:''' The CWCki. 
'''Arthur:''' The CWCki. I see. Yes, they were overlooking it and they came across a few more slightly less than appropriate things and they really wanted to get some clarification about those. 
'''Chris:''' Yes... 
'''Arthur:''' I told them I'd contact you, and get the straight-and-narrow answers right from the horse's mouth. 
'''Chris:''' Yes. Alright, well, fire away. 
'''Arthur:''' Alright. Well, that's not all I have; I also have a few more Sonichu questions that are much more business-oriented, but let's get the ''horrible'' things out of the way first. How's that sound? 
'''Chris:''' Yes, that sounds very good. 
'''Arthur:''' Alright. Well, we're gonna start off right with the biggest issue, I think, it's—I'm going to call it the BlueSpike incident. 
'''Chris:''' Oh yes, the, uh, that was the uh, one of my theoretical ex-girlfriends, who turned out to be a, y—who turned out to be a troll, turned out to be an immature boy, I have no idea whether he's alive or not, whatever, still. B—but anyways, aside from that, and I—so I ended up making a drive all the way from Cleveland, Ohio, and uh... then I ended up with a fi—I ended up going to the address that was provided there, and, uh, d—and the p—em, BlueSpike was not there at all, just an old woman and the house looked run-down, nearly run down as well. 
'''Arthur:''' That's just horrible, why would someone do that? 
'''Chris:''' [''[[sigh]]''] Well, they're either bored, jealous, immature, what have you, all the stereo—amongst the sterotypical reasons. 
'''Arthur:''' I bet it was jealousy. Alright, now the next thing that falls into the same cate''gory'' is: did he actually have you—did y—I nee—I need to know if you faked this or not—did he actually have you insert broken pieces of your medallion into your rectum? 
'''Chris:''' Uh, unfortunately, that... is true. 
'''Arthur:''' That's just horrible. How could that happen? That's—I can't believe it. Oh my god. 
'''Chris:''' Yeah, I believe a—I believe at that time my PlayStation Network account was being held hostage as well... if I remember correctly. 
'''Arthur:''' Okay, okay, so he was holding your thing hostage, so you were just forced into a situation you didn't like. I could understand that. 
'''Chris:''' Yeah, and then I—and then I—later on I finally realized that all the time I should have called Sony and actually had them, pa—re—patch up the password and that would have fixed it, I wouldn't have had to go through all that. So that's too—that's big lesson learned, and ingrained into my memory, against my will, pretty much. 
'''Arthur:''' Yes, it sounds horrible, I can't believe it myself, but it hurts me to think that happened to you. 
'''Chris:''' Yeah. 
'''Arthur:''' But enough about that, um, okay, we covered that, I'm glad we got that out of the way first and foremost, the um, the next thing is, um, it's not so much important, but they wanted to make sure because of, y'know, animal rights activists and whatnot, um, when your [[Destruction Of Chris's House|house burned down]], which by the way: I feel for you, it's a horrible thing to have happen to anybody— 
'''Chris:''' Yeah. 
'''Arthur:''' even though it wasn't the whole thing, thankfully, but still, um, there were rumours being passed around the CWCki, as you called it, that one of your pets died. 
'''Chris:''' Uh, yes, one cat. His name was [[Chandler_Cats#Scamper|Scamper]]—the, uh, cleaners found his body behind the toilet upstairs and—died of smoke inh—inhalation. 
'''Arthur:''' Oh, that's horrible. My—my heart goes out to you. 
'''Chris:''' Well, anyway, anyway—we buried his body in the back yard, and uh, and had a moment of silence there and all that. 
'''Arthur:''' It's a horrible way to lose a pet, but, you know, I understand that hopefully he didn't die painfully. 
'''Chris:''' [''[[sigh]]''] Well, I wish I could have—wish I'd known that he was up there, I would've gotten him out when we were all getting out. 
'''Arthur:''' Well, at least you're alive, and that's what matters. 
'''Chris:''' Yes. 
'''Arthur:''' Now that we've covered that, I mean, I mean, we don't want the animal rights activists to come running forward and think that you didn't care enough, you just let the pet die. 
'''Chris:''' Oh, yeah, I did care, and for a while we thought that he had gotten out, but we were not totally positive, but then we finally came to closure after the cleaners found the body, so—[''[[sigh]]''] my other cat Lucy missed him very much, but su—and, uh, recently we adopted another male cat from the SPCA, eh... 
'''Arthur:''' It's always nice to adopt rather than get a new kitten. It's always nice to adopt. 
'''Chris:''' Yeah. And m—and I wanted to make sure it was an adult cat though, I didn't want to go for a kitten at the time, and it was male, so—eeyel, he and Lucy are getting along fairly well. 
{{Transcript}}

== Audio ==
Currently no video is available, but the audio is available to listen [https://soundcloud.com/cat-knight-430471584/interview3/s-U64WP here].

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Phone calls]]

CatKnight Interview 3

2016-02-07T00:56:33Z

MindHit: Linked two mentions of Scamper to the specific part on the 'Chandler Cats' page

<div class="#0033ff" id="incomplete">
{| cellpadding="0" cellspacing="4" style="background-color: #ffff88; border: 2px solid #00B7EB; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"
|-
| [[Image:Stress.jpg|120px| ]]
| '''Chris section is still yet to be completed due to [[stress]].'''We get a lot of stressful torture in our lives that makes us crash into slumber. Given that inspiration is a big variable, and we may have been lacking of it, this section will be completed as soon as possible, and more images added, at our own pace...''[[HONEST]]!''
|-
|}</div>


[[CatKnight Interview 2|After two successful interviews]], [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] fan CatKnight/Master Disaster aka Sir Arthur Spatchcock, '''interviewed''' our favorite [[Honest Content|TRUE and HONEST]] Christine Weston Chandler for a third time on 2 February 2016.

== Highlights ==

Good ole Sir Arthur Spatchcock asked questions about some information about Chris's past he and his associates found here on the CWCki, such as the [[BlueSpike]] incident, death of Chris's pet cat [[Chandler_Cats#Scamper|Scamper]], etc. Chris also performs his nightmare fuel [[Donald Duck impersonation]], and states he once received a Tupperware full of horse manure. The two then discuss a bit of business and Mr. Spatchcock suggest Chris do a demonstration of his incredible voice acting with his [[Sonichu Amiibo|Sonichu Amiibo]] and himself.

==Transcript==
'''Arthur:''' Hello, Christine? 
'''Chris:''' Yes, hello Arthur. 
'''Arthur:''' Oh, how are you doing today? 
'''Chris:''' I'm alright. 
'''Arthur:''' Fantastic— 
'''Chris:''' Al—alright—let's get down to the, uh, what are your new quesitons, what are your inquiries? 
'''Arthur:''' Well, yes, my associate has spent the last few days unfortunately looking over the C-W-C-I-K-I, what was it called again? 
'''Chris:''' The CWCki. 
'''Arthur:''' The CWCki. I see. Yes, they were overlooking it and they came across a few more slightly less than appropriate things and they really wanted to get some clarification about those. 
'''Chris:''' Yes... 
'''Arthur:''' I told them I'd contact you, and get the straight-and-narrow answers right from the horse's mouth. 
'''Chris:''' Yes. Alright, well, fire away. 
'''Arthur:''' Alright. Well, that's not all I have; I also have a few more Sonichu questions that are much more business-oriented, but let's get the ''horrible'' things out of the way first. How's that sound? 
'''Chris:''' Yes, that sounds very good. 
'''Arthur:''' Alright. Well, we're gonna start off right with the biggest issue, I think, it's—I'm going to call it the BlueSpike incident. 
'''Chris:''' Oh yes, the, uh, that was the uh, one of my theoretical ex-girlfriends, who turned out to be a, y—who turned out to be a troll, turned out to be an immature boy, I have no idea whether he's alive or not, whatever, still. B—but anyways, aside from that, and I—so I ended up making a drive all the way from Cleveland, Ohio, and uh... then I ended up with a fi—I ended up going to the address that was provided there, and, uh, d—and the p—em, BlueSpike was not there at all, just an old woman and the house looked run-down, nearly run down as well. 
'''Arthur:''' That's just horrible, why would someone do that? 
'''Chris:''' [''[[sigh]]''] Well, they're either bored, jealous, immature, what have you, all the stereo—amongst the sterotypical reasons. 
'''Arthur:''' I bet it was jealousy. Alright, now the next thing that falls into the same cate''gory'' is: did he actually have you—did y—I nee—I need to know if you faked this or not—did he actually have you insert broken pieces of your medallion into your rectum? 
'''Chris:''' Uh, unfortunately, that... is true. 
'''Arthur:''' That's just horrible. How could that happen? That's—I can't believe it. Oh my god. 
'''Chris:''' Yeah, I believe a—I believe at that time my PlayStation Network account was being held hostage as well... if I remember correctly. 
'''Arthur:''' Okay, okay, so he was holding your thing hostage, so you were just forced into a situation you didn't like. I could understand that. 
'''Chris:''' Yeah, and then I—and then I—later on I finally realized that all the time I should have called Sony and actually had them, pa—re—patch up the password and that would have fixed it, I wouldn't have had to go through all that. So that's too—that's big lesson learned, and ingrained into my memory, against my will, pretty much. 
'''Arthur:''' Yes, it sounds horrible, I can't believe it myself, but it hurts me to think that happened to you. 
'''Chris:''' Yeah. 
'''Arthur:''' But enough about that, um, okay, we covered that, I'm glad we got that out of the way first and foremost, the um, the next thing is, um, it's not so much important, but they wanted to make sure because of, y'know, animal rights activists and whatnot, um, when your house burned down, which by the way: I feel for you, it's a horrible thing to have happen to anybody— 
'''Chris:''' Yeah. 
'''Arthur:''' even though it wasn't the whole thing, thankfully, but still, um, there were rumours being passed around the CWCki, as you called it, that one of your pets died. 
'''Chris:''' Uh, yes, one cat. His name was [[Chandler_Cats#Scamper|Scamper]]—the, uh, cleaners found his body behind the toilet upstairs and—died of smoke inh—inhalation. 
'''Arthur:''' Oh, that's horrible. My—my heart goes out to you. 
'''Chris:''' Well, anyway, anyway—we buried his body in the back yard, and uh, and had a moment of silence there and all that. 
'''Arthur:''' It's a horrible way to lose a pet, but, you know, I understand that hopefully he didn't die painfully. 
'''Chris:''' [''[[sigh]]''] Well, I wish I could have—wish I'd known that he was up there, I would've gotten him out when we were all getting out. 
'''Arthur:''' Well, at least you're alive, and that's what matters. 
'''Chris:''' Yes. 
'''Arthur:''' Now that we've covered that, I mean, I mean, we don't want the animal rights activists to come running forward and think that you didn't care enough, you just let the pet die. 
'''Chris:''' Oh, yeah, I did care, and for a while we thought that he had gotten out, but we were not totally positive, but then we finally came to closure after the cleaners found the body, so—[''[[sigh]]''] my other cat Lucy missed him very much, but su—and, uh, recently we adopted another male cat from the SPCA, eh... 
'''Arthur:''' It's always nice to adopt rather than get a new kitten. It's always nice to adopt. 
'''Chris:''' Yeah. And m—and I wanted to make sure it was an adult cat though, I didn't want to go for a kitten at the time, and it was male, so—eeyel, he and Lucy are getting along fairly well. 
{{Transcript}}

== Audio ==
Currently no video is available, but the audio is available to listen [https://soundcloud.com/cat-knight-430471584/interview3/s-U64WP here].

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Phone calls]]

Blake

2015-01-19T15:11:54Z

MindHit:

{{quote|He was cloned from [[Sonichu]]'s DNA. with an accidental dose of [[Fanta|Cherry Cola]], in [[Giovanni]]'s evil lab. Blachu [Blake] can run fast as fast as Sonichu, but they don't see spark-to-spark.|[[:Image:249-ACBchuBck.jpg|Black Sonichu [Blake] Animal Crossing card]]}}

{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] character
|-
| colspan="2" | [[Image:Black_Sonichu.jpg|200px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Blake
|-
| '''Date of birth'''
| 22 March 1999 (in universe, as Black Sonichu)
[[Blake#Conception|No later than 24 July 2002]] (IRL)
|-
| '''Gender'''
| Male
|-
| '''Species'''
| [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]] ([[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]) clone
|-
| '''Length'''
| 5'4" (163 cm)
|-
| '''Weight'''
| 120 lbs (54 kg)
|-
| '''Type'''
| Electric
|-
| '''Evolves from'''
| [[Sonee]] or Pikachu
|-
| '''Evolves into'''
| Silver Blachu
|-
|}

'''Blake''', originally called '''[[Niggos|Black]] Sonichu''' (and occasionally '''Blachu''') (born 22 March [[1999]]<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Blake_Black_Sonichu http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Blake_Black_Sonichu]</ref>), is a [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]], and was once the arch-nemesis of [[Sonichu]]. He is also, inexplicably, [[Bubbles Rosechu]]'s boyfriend (and later husband outside of the [[comic]] canon). However, for some reason, Blake and Bubbles decided to hide it from all of their friends, not knowing that their friends already knew about the relationship. He rips off three characters: [[Sonic the Hedgehog|Shadow the Hedgehog]], [[Pokémon|Pikachu]] and [[Pokémon|Mewtwo]].
==Conception==
While Chris has taken care to inform us of the precise dates in which he concieved of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu (character)|Rosechu]],<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#Conception_and_Creation 17 March 2000] and [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Rosechu#Origins 22 December 2000], respectively.</ref> he did not do the same for Blake. We can safely deduce that he was not conceived at a point later than 24 [[2002#July|July 2002]], since on said date Chris made a [[:File:250-BlachuCard1.jpg|homemade card]] of Blake (then called Black Sonichu).

When Chris first imagined the ''Sonichu'' canon, it was a clear case of wish-fulfillment. On discovering that [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarah Hammer]] was going out with [[Wes Iseli]], Chris imagined a fantasy world where he ([[Sonichu]]) was the beloved sweetheart of Sarah ([[Rosechu]]) and the villainous Black Sonichu was the jealous Wes, who stalked the lovers.<ref>[[BFF's (Best Friends Forever)]]</ref><ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]]</ref><ref>[[Sonichu 0]]</ref> Blake later evolved into a blatant rip-off of Shadow the Hedgehog who started out as Sonichu's nemesis but later became an ally.

==In the comics==
===''Sonichu'' #1===

[[Image:BlakeStats.jpg|thumb|Blake's stats. You know, in case you gave a damn]]

He first appeared in issue 1, episode 4. [[Robotnik|Dr. Robotnik]] was attempting to clone Sonichu and the cloning process was corrupted by "an accidental does of cherry cola," spilt by [[Bill The Scientist]].

This soda in his DNA changed his fur color to black and red. This makes him an obvious ripoff of Shadow the Hedgehog. Shortly after being created, he was ordered to kidnap [[Rosechu]]. [[Sonic]] and Sonichu thwarted this plan much to his chagrin. As punishment for kidnapping her, Rosechu punched him in the face and knocked some of his teeth out, showing what a pussy he really is.

===[[Sonichu_3#Episode_11:_The_Chaotic_Combo_in_.22When_Hedgehogs_Meet.22|When Hedgehogs Meet]]===

Blake is ordered to steal the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]] by [[Giovanni]] because Blake is his bitch. Easily overpowering [[Flame the Sunbird]], he jumps on his hoverboard and escapes with [[Flame]] in pursuit. During the chase he somehow manages to pass by and piss off almost every single member of the soon-to-be-formed [[Chaotic Combo]]. [[Sonichu]] himself jumps into the mix and every last one of them gangs up on Blake and beats the living crap out of him - fair fighting, y'know?

=== ''Sonichu'' #5 ===

In issue five, Blake actually refers to [[Naitsirhc]] as his father while mistaking him for [[CWC]]. Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc wears a Blake [[Medallion]] that allows him to transform into an evil Electric Hedgehog Pokémon.

=== ''Sonichu'' #6 ===

Blake is dismayed to see that Naitsirhc has become Reldnahc Ha-Taque. After robbing stores with him, Blake complains to Sonichu and [[Magi-Chan]] about how he was really mean to him - insulting him all the time and putting whipped cream in his rocket boots. Blake then allows the reader to see that he has the hots for Bubbles - in spite of her helping the [[Chaotic Combo]] beat seven shades of crap out of him.

===Episode 18 Prologue===

On March 21, Bubbles celebrates Blake’s birthday alone with him. They share a kiss after explaining how Blake has the maturity of a twenty-year-old despite being cloned only four years ago.

===[[Sonichu_8#Episode_18:_.22Spring_Break.2C_2008.22|Spring break]]===

Blake approaches Rosechu, [[Angelica]] and Bubbles whilst they sunbathe on the beach and kicks sand in their faces to make him look badass. Bubbles steps up to “deal with this jerk.” She restrains him and leads him away with the others to be alone with him. The other two Rosechus think it’s “cute” that they pretend to not be a couple.

Bubbles and Blake agree to have sex under a pier after she finds the Sonichu Ball. Unfortunately for Blake, [[Silvana]] takes the form of Bubbles so she can rape him just for laughs. Bubbles finds the [[Sonichu Ball]], but not in time to save Blake.

===[[Sonichu_9#Episode 20: CWC-Defense|CWC-Defense]]===

CWCville is attacked by [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PVCC]] and fighting ensues all over the city. On the waterfront, Blake and Bubbles defeat an entire fleet of [[Decepti-Clones#S.A.V.s (Scoundrals as Vessels)|S.A.V.'s]] and proceed to kiss afterwards. Later on at the end of the episode they're seen outside of the [[CWCville Shopping Center]] along with the rest of Chris's [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]s and their respective partners. Blake and Bubbles are holding hands, suggesting that they're no longer hiding their relationship from the rest of the public.

===[[Sonichu_10#Episode 21: Christian Chandler in Director Amenities|Christian Chandler in Director Amenities]]===

As this was the episode in which Chris's narcissism reached its pinnacle, it was more than fitting for it to also be the story in which Blake completed his transformation into just another one of Chris's pawns. Despite becoming a full fledged good guy, Blake's propensity toward evil in this episode is greater than ever.

After returning from the [[Time Void]], Chris orders Blake and [[Punchy]] to go outside of the [[4-cent garbage.com|4-cent Garbage]] building where he and Sonichu will meet them later. Once all the members of [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] get together, they proceed to destroy the 4-cent Garbage building by playing the song ''[[Revive Zordon]]'' in its proximity. Hundreds endure death and injury as the building collapses, making Blake and the rest of his bandmates mass murderers.

Later on the episode's plot is briefly interrupted for Chris to make a non-apology apology to the LGBT community and other readers he had offended. Blake is standing next to him along with Bubbles, Sonichu and Rosechu, suggesting that his status within Chris's entourage has risen considerably. Blake's next appearance is in the mayor's office where he joins the rest of Chris's goons in ranting against the [[Asperchu|Asperpedia four]]. He is last seen in the episode (and in Sonichu altogether) as he is standing next to Bubbles while she presses one of the ten buttons needed to activate the electric chair to which Alec is strapped. Blake stares at Alec with indignant rage, despite having a rap sheet far worse than that of the doomed comic creator.

===Future episodes===

In a [[CWC Blog#12 January 2010|blog post from January 2010]] Chris writes about a planned episode of Sonichu which will focus on Blake. The chances of Chris making anymore comics in the future are believed by most to be slim to none.

==CWCipedia biography==

{{quote|The only differences are their color, shoes and this one is more evil.|Chris, informing us that Sonichu is also evil}}

According to the [[CWCipedia]]'s [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Blake_Black_Sonichu entry on Blake], he was created on [[Sonichu chronology#1999|22 March 1999]], following the battle between Sonichu and Naitsirhc Giovanni on 12 August 1998 (It's cited that it took a while to rebuild the cloning machine, most likely referring to Mewtwo's escape in ''[[Wikipedia:Pokémon: The First Movie|Pokémon: The First Movie]]''). Through the help of [[Bill the Scientist]], cherry soda is spilled into the DNA, which causes the Sonichu to turn black. Four months later, Black is primed to battle Sonichu, though his first battle goes sour even with the arrival of Metal Sonichu. Blake would continue to do evil, stealing the Master Sunstone and the like. It's said that he enjoyed the rush of villainy, but at the same time, started regretting it.

Everything would change when Black Sonichu prepared to capture Sonichu and Rosechu during their wedding. There, he would see Bubbles Rosechu for the first time. He was so enamored over her that he didn't fire the net gun he was intending to use to capture the two with when he wanted to and when he did, he missed completely. He would learn her name through one of the programs for the wedding.

The two wouldn't meet again until Naitsirhc's transformation into Reldnahc. When they did meet, Bubbles ended up chewing out Black for a good fifteen minutes. Not accustomed to criticism, Black did "an emotional [[Chris humps his PS3|One-Eighty]]" and just broke down and cried like the baby he was, begging for forgiveness. Bubbles accepted and began forming a bond with him. Over ice cream, Black introduced himself as "Black Sonichu," but Bubbles hated a name like that, so she named him "Blake," after a star's name.

When coming into contact with the seven [[Sonichu Balls]] - or with the seven Chaos emeralds upon which the Sonichu Balls are based - Blake can temporarily transform into ''Silver Blachu''. Silver's powers are very similar to those of [[Ultra Sonichu]], Sonichu's own temporary transformation which is induced by the seven Sonichu Balls.<ref>For comparison, see [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Blake_Black_Sonichu#.28Temporary_Transformation.29_Silver_Blachu Silver Blachu] and [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#.28Temporary_Transformation.29_Ultra_Sonichu Ultra Sonichu] on the [[CWCipedia]].</ref> Silver is identical to Blake in physical appearance, with the exception of having gray fur rather than black.

Practically none of this shows up in the comic itself, not even through Chris's lazy textwalls he uses to explain the minor details (such as the tragic death of his [[Ivy|true, God-foreseen love]]) he doesn't want to bother drawing.

== Name ==

[[Image:Nigrachu.jpg|thumb]]

Originally, Blake was just referred to as "Black Sonichu" or "Blachu", but Chris decided to change the name so as to look like less of [[:Image:SchuComic9Page19-C.jpg|a bigoted racist jerk]]. Why he is suddenly called "Blake" is never revealed. Chris assumed that everyone would understand why his name is now Blake, so everyone just goes with it.

Chris, in the CWCipedia article on Sonichu, finally provided the reason why Black Sonichu became Blake - because Blake felt like it.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#Slaweel_and_Graduon_Entraps_Crystal.2FNaitsirch_Transforms http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#Slaweel_and_Graduon_Entraps_Crystal.2FNaitsirch_Transforms]</ref> This was later retconned into saying that Bubbles gave him the name.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Blake_Black_Sonichu#Blake_and_Bubbles Blake_Black_Sonichu#Blake_and_Bubbles]</ref>

Some argue that Chris was indeed ripping off [[Jimmy Hill|Jimmy Hill's]] incarnation of Black Sonichu, who was named "Blake" for some time before Chris started using Blake.<ref>http://sonichu.110mb.com/merchandise.html</ref>

Despite going to great lengths to use the retconned names in the [[Official Videobooks]] (such as "Nicole Rammer" for [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarah Hammer]]), Chris still uses Blake's original name in most of [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]] and [[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]].

== Love Quest ==

In episode 18, it is revealed that Blake has a secret romance with [[Bubbles]] and that they have sex with [[raincoat|raincoats]] and don't let the rest of [[CWCville]] know. To cover up their relationship, they pretend to fight and he acts like an ass. At the end of the episode he gets raped by a shape-shifting hermaphrodite named Silvana. This rape is meant to be a metaphor representing Chris being trolled by men pretending to be women online. Lulz.

Interestingly enough, [[Chris and Reality|in Chris's imagination]], Bubbles and Blake were married 4 July 2009, at [[Angelica]]'s church. This indicates that despite Blake's failure to control his own [[Duck|libido]], Bubbles forgave him and everyone lived happily ever after.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate July 26, 2009]]</ref>

==Gallery==

<center>
<gallery>
Image:070-SchuVsBchu.jpg
Image:080-SilverBchu.jpg|He has a super form, too.
Image:248-ACBchu.jpg
Image:249-ACBchuBck.jpg
Image:250-BlachuCard1.jpg
Image:251-GiosBchu.jpg
Image:252-BlachuCard2.jpg
Image:253-YuBchu.jpg
Image:254-BlachuPose.jpg|THIS IS MY ANGRY FACE
Image:255-YuSilvBchu.jpg
File:Shoes.PNG|Blake's magic shoes
</gallery>
</center>
==References==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Blake_Black_Sonichu}}
<references/>
==See also==
*[[Niggos]]
{{Hedgehog Boys}}
{{Not_Jerks}}
{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Villains]]
[[Category:Sonichus]]
[[Category:Christian and the Hedgehog Boys band members]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]

Sarah Nicole Hammer

2015-01-19T14:56:46Z

MindHit: Just fixing a couple typos.

[[Image:0715-ChristianWSarahcropped.jpg|thumb|150px|Chris & Sarah shortly after her wedding<ref>According to Chris's comments on the [[CWCipedia]], this picture was taken shortly after Sarah's wedding.[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#C.W.C._Growing_Up_Gallery]</ref>]]

{{quote|Sarah is Christian's Life-Long Best Friend. She is a spunky gal, and she is very pretty. One may say that she is the spitting image of Britney Spears.|[[:Image:298-ACSarahBck.jpg|Animal Crossing card]] describing Sarah Hammer; who looks nothing like [[Britney Spears]]}}

'''Sarah Nicole Hammer''' (born 13 October [[1982]]<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#The Story|Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]], page 1</ref>) was the [[Wikipedia:Girl next door|girl next door]]<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref> for [[Chris]] from age 2 until around age 10, when he moved away, whom he apparently considered his closest friend. Chris met Sarah again when he entered [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] when he came back to the county after finishing [[Manchester High School]]. Although by [[2005]] Chris had come to regard Sarah as his best and closest friend however, Chris seems to suggest that he hasn't had much contact with her as compared to his childhood.

As far as can be told, Chris has had no contact with Sarah since he came into [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|the spotlight]], and unlike [[Megan Schroeder]] there aren't any [[Mimms|trolls]] who know her IRL capable of updating us on her status. There's no evidence to suggest that Sarah has even seen the comics, or has any opinion on them.

==Sarah Hammer in real life==
[[Image:SarahHammerPortrait.jpg|thumb|right|Like anything that looks good in real life, Chris ruins it by drawing it.]]
===Childhood===
{{quote|She brought me a lot out of my [[autism|autistic]] social shell for the time back then.|[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992|Wikipedia autobiography]]}}

Chris continues to cherish many important memories with Sarah, such as riding swing sets, playing hide and seek, and rollerskating.

It is not entirely known if Sarah actually cared about Chris. In [[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]], Chris recounts a story in which Sarah told Chris that Casper the friendly ghost was hiding under the house. Chris, being as [[Autism|childish]] as he's always known to be, fell for it and went to search for him. When Chris entered the crawlspace, Sarah locked him in and left. Eventually, Sarah's father had to come and get him out.

Sarah also tried to convince Chris to put a honeysuckle in his mouth. Specifically the tip, which is sometimes alleged to be poisonous. Chris almost fell for this one, but his parents caught him and warned him of its "dangers". And you know what they say: a girl that tries to kill you isn't really your friend.

Sarah and Chris were the same age and attended the same elementary school, but Chris moved to [[Richmond]] to attend middle school<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]], page 7.</ref> and would not see Sarah again until after he returned to Ruckersville on June [[2000]].<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]], page 10.</ref> In [[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]], made on 4 June 1998, Chris named one of the characters after Sarah, suggesting that he was still thinking about her at the time.

Chris has suggested that he did not originally view Sarah as a potential [[sweetheart]]; this decision apparently came later, most likely due to autism and a sheltered upbringing.

===She got hot===
Between [[2000]] and [[2003]] Sarah grew up and shed her old image, and became so attractive to Chris that he later called her "a spittin' image of [[Britney Spears]]."<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Over the Years|Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]], page 9</ref> The fact that he thinks she looks like Britney Spears is probably just because she has boobs and long blonde hair. She actually looks nothing like Britney Spears and has a completely different face shape, but Chris is notorious for his [[Blanca Weiss|poor facial recognition skills]]. This is the man who had to stare at himself in a mirror for hours to remember what ''he'' actually looked like after all.<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_7/Page_24</ref>

===With Wes Iseli===
By Chris's admission, he hadn't had much contact with Sarah after he moved to Richmond, although at some point he apparently concluded that they were destined to be lovers. Unfortunately for him, at a certain point Sarah started dating local magician/heart-throb [[Wes Iseli]], eventually moving in with him at some point prior to July [[2000]].<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]]. page 12.</ref> Learning about this development was clearly traumatic for Chris. On one occasion Chris saw Sarah sitting in Wes's lap, which made Chris visibly jealous; this incident was important enough (to Chris, anyway) to document in his [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]]. A similar freak out occurred when Chris saw Megan sitting on the lap of one of her male friends around the time he was discovered by [[4chan|/v/]], and he still gets insanely jealous whenever he sees a girl sitting on the lap of any other man, likely because it reminds him of the [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]].<ref>[[Megan_Emails,_Aug-Dec_2007#Chris is scared of some fanart]]</ref>

Chris regards losing Sarah to Wes as one of the two reasons he launched his [[Love Quest]]. Although this event technically changed nothing—Chris had never had a girlfriend and still did not—it spurred him to action, giving him a reason to actively seek out and obtain a [[Boyfriend-free girl]].

The lyrics of Christian's song "[[BFF's (Best Friends Forever)]]" seem to be addressing Sarah, with Chris conceding the impossibility of romantic love and seeking greater fulfillment in a [[friend zone|closer platonic friendship]]. His comparison of "your boyfriend" (presumably Wes) to [[Black Sonichu]] recast himself and the couple into the hero-lover-rival ''troika'' that he developed for [[Sonichu]], and then further refined by featuring Wes as [[Wes-Li Sonichu|an evil hedgehog]] in his own right. Thankfully, Wes's career proved resilient enough to survive the trauma.

To this day, there exist no records of what Sarah's reaction to any of this insanity was, not even in Chris's recounting of the events.

===With William Spicer===
At some point Chris learned that Sarah broke up with Wes and then subsequently met another man, [[William Spicer]], whom she eventually married and now has a child with. The ups and downs of how Chris took this news are captured in how the fictional Chris reacted in [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]] after Sarah tells him, and in [[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu #5'']] when Chris made a comic adaptation of her wedding. Chris knew so little about Spicer, probably having never met him, that in the comic he decided to depict the groom as a [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] character so that he wouldn't have to draw the actual person. If the comic is anything to go by, Chris did not attend the wedding in real life, but quietly accepted Sarah's decision anyway. William Spicer was spared the fate of being made into a one dimensional Sonichu villain like his predecessor was however, though not because Wes had done wrong while William had not, but rather because Wes was unlucky enough to have dated Sarah while Chris was interested in her, while by the time William was marrying her, Chris had already moved on to [[Megan]].

===Epilogue===

In a chat from 16 [[April 2009]], Chris mentioned that the last time he had seen Sarah was shortly after her wedding. He had heard little of her afterwards except for a few updates from [[Bob]] and [[Joshua Martinez]].<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref> On 18 [[April 2010]] Chris again stated that he had lost touch with Sarah after her marriage.<ref>[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)#Sarah Nicole Hammer (Spicer)]]</ref> On 14 [[March 2010]], shortly after the CWCki instituted [[CWCki:The Wallflower|The Wallflower policy]], Chris wrote a blog post asking that the CWCki will erase from its pages all the references to various people he cares about, Sarah among them.<ref>[[CWC Blog#14 March 2010]]</ref>

==Sarah in the comic==
Christian first hints at Sarah's involvement in the Sonichu comics in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu #0'']], where he alludes to three mysterious electric hedgehogs: [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], [[Wes-Li Sonichu]], and Saramah Rosechu. This is the closest Chris can come to a slow-building long-term mystery, so of course he [[comeuppance|blew his wad]] right away, revealing the identities of at least two of these characters a few pages later in the [[Classic Sonichu Strips]].

===Sarah Hammer/Nicole Rammer===
[[Image:Sarah hammer reimagined.png|thumb|left|Artist's impression of Sarah Hammer and the Lightning Bracelets.]]

After Chris activated the anchuent powers foretold by the [[Anchuent Prophecy]], Sarah had a vision of the ancient queen of the [[Cherokian Clan]], who explained her role in the prophecy and gave her the Lightning Bracelets. Using the bracelets Sarah could transform into Saramah Rosechu, whose role in the prophecy would be to maintain the balance between Chris-Chan and Wes-Li.

When Sarah discovered these two hedgehogs, they were already locked in battle. Although at first she didn't know who Chris-Chan and Wes-Li were, Saramah quickly learned that the hedgehogs were also her old friend Christian and her recent boyfriend [[Wes Iseli]]. Forced to choose between these two men, Saramah [[Chris and his Ego|remembered who was writing the comic]], so she impaled Wes-Li against a tree and broke up with him, citing his cruelty toward Christian. Saramah actually spent more time dressing down Wes than she did battling [[Count Graduon]], the evil she and the others were prognosticated to defeat.

With Wes quickly departing, Chris and Sarah returned to their human forms and caught up on old times. Chris believed he now had an easy path to becoming Sarah's [[sweetheart]], but unfortunately for him she was already interested in another man, [[William Spicer]].

Though Sarah technically did not appear again until [[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu #5'']], she did appear in one of the Classic Sonichu Strips from [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu #0'']]. The one which she appeared in was reprinted in [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu #4'']] and established as having taken place a few weeks before the events of Sub-Episode 7.

Later, in ''Sonichu #5'', Chris would invisibly attend Sarah's wedding to William Spicer, being on-hand for Wes-Li's attempt to kidnap her. Using his Chris-Chan Sonichu powers and [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] cards, Chris rescued Sarah, who then rewarded him by tossing him the bouquet and wished him luck in his pursuit of [[Megan]]. In spite of this issue being based around Sarah's wedding and being intended as a sendoff to her character, she did remarkably little in this story, just [[Women's rights|filling the role of the kidnapped princess]].

Sarah was not seen in the comic for a long time afterwards, but she did appear again in [[Sonichu Special 2]], also known as the Wedding Comic. In this comic, she attends Chris's ill fated marriage to [[Ivy]], dressing [[Tomgirl|in drag]] and acting as the best man, since Chris doesn't actually have any friends other than her who could fill that role other than [[Sonichu|fictional characters]] or possibly [[Bob Chandler|his father]]. One can't shake the feeling that he'd probably ask Sarah to do this in a real life wedding too.

Thanks to the efforts of [[Nintendo]] lawyer [[Jay Z]] during the [[Miyamoto Saga]], Sarah later became one of many characters who had their names [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retconned]] in the story, due to being based on real life people. As such, in the [[Sonichu Videobooks]], Sarah Hammer instead became Nicole [[Dildo|Rammer]].

===Saramah Rosechu===
[[Image:076-IlluminatingSarahama.jpg|thumb|Not creepy at all.]]

{{quote|Sarhamah's [sic] origin is unknown but her radiance shines brighter than the sun. When she shoots her arrows, they fly like lightning bolts. She is also known as a peaceful protector. And she is lovely, [[Angelica|angelic]], and simply irresistible.|[[:Image:301-ACSarhamahBck.jpg|Sarhamah Rosechu Animal Crossing card]].}}

Most, if not all of Sarah's appearances in Chris's comics are in the form of Saramah [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]], using the powers bestowed upon her by the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] to transform into a furry. She has no actual personality beyond asserting her deep, abiding friendship with Christian, which again suggests that he knows nothing about this person except what he likes to think she feels about him. Sarah is able to activate this form through use of the Lightning Bracelets, which act as her own equivalent to Chris's [[Sonichu Medallion]] or Wes Iseli's Fireshock Pendant.

Prior to the retcon, Saramah Rosechu was a much more sensible name for Sarah's Sonichu form, even if still slightly weird. Since the change however, new readers of the comic who are not aware of the background of the character are just left baffled by the strange notion that a woman named "Nicole" transforms into a hedgehog and is then named "Sarah" for some reason.

Due to her lack of a large role in the comics, Saramah Rosechu doesn't have many powers compared to the other two chosen ones of the prophecy. While Chris and Wes both use weird [[Pokémon]] related attacks or [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] cards to fight, aside from the retarded Team Blast attack ripped off from ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic Heroes]]'', Sarah is only ever seen using her bow and arrow to fight with. Both the bow and arrow are lightning bolt shaped. They may or may not be literally made of electricity. [[Chris and art|It's hard to tell with Chris's art.]]

===Queen of the Cherokian Clan===
[[Image:Queen_of_the_Cherokian_Clan.PNG|thumb|left|100px|The only picture of her to this date.]]

Wife of the [[ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]], and the [[Cherokian Clan]]'s queen.

Little is established about the queen except that she was the object of a rivalry between her husband and his [[Wasabi Rival]]. She would be reincarnated as [[Sarah Hammer]], about whom we know little except that she was the object of a "rivalry" between [[Christian Weston Chandler]] and [[Wes Iseli]]. This is a good example of how Chris's female characters exist only to motivate his male ones and/or be fap material. The [[Anchuent Prophecy]] caused Sarah to learn of her past life and thereby gain the powers of [[Saramah Rosechu]], which she was tutored in using by a vision of the Queen.

The queen hasn't shown up since that single appearance, and considering that Sarah/Saramah has been absent from the comic since getting married in ''Sonichu #5'' save for her brief cameo at Chris's wedding,<ref>[[Wedding Comic]], [[:Image:SchuComicSP2P6.jpg|p. 6]]</ref> it's highly unlikely she'll ever show up again.

Oddly enough, of the three ancestors, she is the only one who actually looks something like a Native American; although she's still blonde and blue-eyed, she's wearing a dress that could be made of deerskin, which is the stereotypical way of dressing Native ladies in works of fiction. At least Chris got that part right.

{{-}}

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
File:053-SongsBetweenFriendsCD.jpg|A CD for Sarah
Image:297-ACSarah.jpg|"Sarah Hammer" [[Animal Crossing]] Card.
Image:298-ACSarahBck.jpg|Sarah Hammer card back.
Image:300-ACSarhamah.jpg|"Saramah" Animal Crossing Card.
Image:301-ACSarhamahBck.jpg|Saramah card back.
Image:299-SarahHammer.jpg|Picture of human Sarah.
Image:303-Sarhamah.jpg|Picture of furfag Sarah.
Image:302-YuSahramah.jpg|Saramah Rosechu ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'' card.
Image:304-LightningBracelets.jpg|Lightning Bracelets ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'' card.
</gallery>
</center>

== Sources ==
<references />

==See also==
*[[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu #2'']]
*[[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu #5'']]
*[[Chris-Chan Sonichu]]
*[[Wes Iseli]]
*[[Cherokian Clan]]
*[[Anchuent Prophecy]]
*[[Megan Schroeder]]

{{Sweethearts}}
{{People}}
{{Sonichu}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Hammer, Sarah Nicole}}
[[Category:Gal pals]]
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]

Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia

2014-08-24T11:31:52Z

MindHit: /* Re: Coming out to my parents */

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Template:DeadLinks}}
'''Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia''' is a defunct forum that was established in late [[April 2011]] and ceased to exist later that year<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20111028013842/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/] (Archive from 28 Oct 2011)</ref>. [[Chris]] was posting as himself under the alias "Kookydashy". This resulted in several stories of his exploits as a [[tomgirl]] that, to say the least, made the effort of tracking him down more than worth it. Chris posted on and off, trying his best to conceal his identity in the most obvious way possible. Below are his T&ToV posts, with blue representing Chris's posts and red representing posts in the threads he was responding to.

== Posts ==
===Re: Introductions!===
In which Chris openly announces he is Christian Weston Chandler as much as he can without actually saying it.

[[Image:ponyboy.jpg|thumb|[[My Little Pony|Kookydashy]]: Interests include [[Plush Breasts of Fail|breasts]], [[China|pussy]], and [[Autism Awareness E-mails|autism awareness]].]]

{{quotebox|Hello, fellow tomgirls. :)

Y'all may address me by my screen name in the board talk. I like [[Chris and Music|music]], [[Kaka Makeup Basics|makeup]], [[Chris and Fashion|dressin' up]] in my mini, [[Mass Debating|havin' fun]] 'n hangin' with my [[Gal-pals|girlfriend]]s, [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|karaoke]], [[video games]], crafting and [[art]].

I am also [[Lies|empathetic]], so [[Autism|I can understand others people's feelings]], as well as my own. I am a dynamic, complex individual.

I do not have many [[jerks|dude pals]], because I have my own mental hang-ups against the majority of them; Nothing Personal. I have a history of being bullied by some mean brutes, as well as [[homos|homosexuals]], over the [[internet]]. Cyber-Bullies/[[Trolls]]/Anons are a hot button with me. I prefer not to discuss that issue further.

And I am an all-around good, [[death threats|friendly]], [[List of Chris's lies|honest]], [[Vibrator|heterosexual]] tomgirl.

Thank you all for offering me respect, as I respect each of you and your opinions on the board.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=2&p=157#p157]</ref>}}

===Re: Coming out to my parents===
In this thread, Chris opened up about his parents' feelings in regards to his newfound fetish.

{{quotebox|Y'all are singin' my song; my [[Barb|mom]] and [[Bob|dad]] were shocked bad when I told them I was a tomgirl. Soo Literally old-fasioned (they're both [[Chris and English|seinors]]). My mom said "I didn't raise a daughter", and my father threw the damned "fag" card at me.

I will Always be Straight, Mom and Dad; give me some faith and trust.

What a world with outside influances to put great paranoia in our families.

Also, try looking up "tomgirl" on [[Wikipedia]]; it redirects to "effeminancy". While effeminancy is true for us, I feel the contents of that page is against us, due to it addressing the [[homos]].

Someone needs to undo the redirects, edit the grammer errors in "tomgirl"`s original edit, and add a ton more detail to it.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&p=160#p160]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|My mom is still giving me complaints and nit-picks about me wearing my feminine attire. I wish I could just up and move out and not have to deal with my family; I don't know too many other people here in C-Ville, and those I do know I'm only acquainted with or know little about them for only a few weeks.

Plus finding employment is hard. I got a [[CADD|fancy computer degree]] from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|community college]], and there have been very slim pickings from it. Already Taken; Quota's Filled; yada, yada, yada.

Plus also, she keeps throwing disbelief towards us by stating "Tomgirls aren't real"; SHE'S a Tomboy; what a bunch of 1940's old-fashioned crap. Plus she watches too much current news, and she is soo paranoid and shit.

I wish I could afford to move out, but I can't afford it [[monthly tugboat|financially]], [[Autism|mentally]] and [[stress|emotionally]]. Fucking [[Chris and anger|pisses me off.]]<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&start=20]</ref>}}

===Re: Girly Things Tee Hee===

{{quotebox|After I realized my tomgirly ways, and starting dressing up in my skirts, I started feeling discomfort in using the Men's restroom. I asked my closest [[gal pal]] if it would be going too far in using the Ladies' room; she told me to go with my feelings. My next skirted outting, I used the ladies' room, and I squatted, holding my [[duck|arrow]] down over the john (so I would be less likely to soil my skirt); it felt good and Right. Days later, though, after 4 more lady trips; a woman complains and tattles on me, and a stereotypical [[jerk|Brute male]] shouts me out. I felt embarassed. When in skirt, I am still gonna go to the Ladies, because there is no goin' back for me.

[[Rape|Heck, I would not hold it against a tomboy who felt more comfort in using the Men's room over the Ladies']].

As truest Tomgirls, we do respect greatly the women as equals. [[lie|I would never look]] or anything of the sort.

Open for your thoughts.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|I've recently got into the original Squinkies, they are so cute and cool. And their gumball-machine dispensing playsets are neat. I like the cupcake-shaped one. And they're also coming out with Squinkie cars for Hot Wheels and Cars 2; little Squinkie people now have cool wheels to drive.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&start=10]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|Something else girly I enjoy danglin' around where I go is my ankle bracelet. It's a silver chain with sections of 4 silver beads, and I've added three stars on chains onto the hook. I never take it off, because it is an awesome and cute jewelry, plus it is difficult to put it back on. LOL

I also am enjoying the "Mighty Milky Way" DSiWare game on my [[Nintendo|3DS]]. Luna is a cute, sexy gal, and the method of guiding her from planet to planet is neat.

Anyone else on here with a 3DS may add me onto y'all's Friend List with my code, 2836-0121-9073. Please P.M. me with your 3DS F.C. in response if y'all add me.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=382#p382]</ref>}}

===Re: Homosexuals===
[[Image:TG20.jpg|thumb|Hear that, homos? Chris is offended by your flamboyance!]]
{{quotebox|I do not care much for the [[homosexual]] males either. I mean, I really feel offended when they get soo flamboyant with their ways and such, it's like they're shoving it in your face. Plus, most of the Cyber-Bullies who gave me grief were homos [[Jack Thaddeus|themselves]], placing their damn label onto me wrongfully.

[[Magi-Chan|As long as they each keep it to themselves and behind closed doors, I won't bother them]].<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

===Re: July Meetup===

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Sun May 29, 2011 9:58 pm'''

That's right, everyone. It's that time again. Time to plan our big meet up for July. We're currently looking to meet up somewhere that's kinda central and should be easy for everyone.

First off, remember to dress your best. I'm going to wear my old dress uniform like normal but if you'd like to give us a sneak peak of your outfit, please feel free to do so here.

Also, any suggestions for Date / Time / Location is welcome.

Looking forward to seeing everyone there!|DanielleTheRiveter<ref name="July Meetup">[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=27&p=229#p229]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|How about at the [[Two's_company_snapshots|Applebees]] next to Toys 'R' Us on Branchlands Lane on a Monday; at 9 PM, they have Karaokee night there. Meet and greet first and sing-along after.<ref name="July Meetup" />}}

===Re: FUKKEN HATERSSSssssssssss===
In which Chris fantasizes about an unrealistic encounter with a "hater", then throws in some unintelligible [[Random-access humor|RAH]].

{{quotebox|I would generally ignore the haters' hurtful comments and move forward too. But if they are really in my face calling me gay or telling me [[virgin|I won't be geeting a woman]], I would tell them like it is in my miniskirt, "All I have to do is lift up my skirt and I'll be up your woman's biz in seconds." :)<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=32&p=291#p291]</ref>}}

===Re: What part of Virginia are you from?===

{{quotebox|Charlottesville is my city of stompin' ground; it can stand some improvement, though. More excitement, and maybe a strip club or two. LOL.

I've also resided in Midlothian for my Middle and [[High School]] years.<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20110722211606/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=35&p=292] (Archive from 22 Jul 2011)</ref>}}

===Re: 10 interesting facts about you!===
Unsurprisingly the most bland, useless information is considered by Chris to be an "interesting fact".

{{quotebox|[[Autism|1.]] I like to take my time to think of how I feel about the current topic, as well as responding in discussion.

[[Lie|2.]] I am empathetic.

[[Fat|3.]] I appreciate how the fast food places wised up and started offering apple slices as a healthier option after decades of fried potatoes.

[[Trolls|4.]] With my history of being trolled and online coomunicating, I feel online socializing only makes people more autistic-like. People need to wise up and go back to feeling comfortable socializing in person.

[[Cwcsicle|5.]] I have sassy, fun ideas sometimes.

[[Sonichu|6.]] I am good at hand-drawing, coloring and story creating.

[[Manchester High School|7.]] I have had happy years in High School.

[[Autism|8.]] I try to be cautious of other people's intentions and feelings while communicating and coping with them.

[[Lie|9.]] I am technologically and musically inclined.

[[Chris and Art|10.]] I enjoy tinkering and creating when I feel inspired.<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20110722211622/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=34&p=293] (Archive from 22 Jul 2011)</ref>}}

===Re: tomboy looking 4 tomgirl===
[[Image:Suchin.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Sun May 29, 2011 2:44 am'''

hello my name is suchin and i am originally from thailand. my friends call me william or will because i am rowdy and like to have fun i am looking for tomgirl to treat me right. i work in manicure salon now and i love beauty on my men and dirt on me

[image]

this is me. what is you? lets meet up and exchange details. i am from richmond but will be in charlottesville for the 4th of july. i love freedom now too.
your turn now! fi dorrar. sacki aur bunti. PLEASE send me a message!|William<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl">[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|There is a pretty face, lovely head of [[hair]] and [[Women's Rights|a nice rack]] in the photo. But I feel I have to interject here.

How do we know you are really that woman, or are you really some immature, trolling stupid brat trying to stir trouble on our forum? People have done that sort of thing over the internet; I fell victim to communicating with such people. And from that, I have learned to keep most personal things offline and to myself.

Anyway, I am not going to fall for such an obvious facade, and I wish to prevent anyone else from finding such gross disappointment and disaster.

Fess up, man.<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:27 am '''

Hey I'm going to be down in Richmond tomorrow anyway, I think you're pretty cute so I'd like to meet up if possible.

I understand if this is kind of sudden, but when I saw that picture I just knew I had to meet this woman.|Tippy<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:33 am'''

kookydashy your comment make me so sad? i work so hard on my body to be my tomboy self and i am so tired of others putting me down for me being me. sometimes i think it because they jealous but for you to accuse me of being troll, someting i hate most in whole american world, make me cry some. this remind me of my sister telling me i cannot wear pants because i am woman. i can wear pants AND NOT BE MAN OR UGLY!!!!

as for Tippy, you sound so nice. I would love to meet a creature like you in reality world! i would even love to do your hair and nails and so much more... I am excite now! Yes! Please! I get out of work at around six. Can we do drinkies than??
|William<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:38 am'''

OMG that's perfect, I'm supposed to have an early dinner meeting with a supplier, so I will be free right around six. I'll private message you my cell number and other info so we can exchange our numbers and stuff. I am so excited, I cannot wait. I will be counting down the hours till we meet up my Tomboy dream. We'll have drinks, and maybe dessert ;). Hehehehe|Tippy<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:44 am'''

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Sawatdee kaa!! <3 You are true lady AND gentleman! I will call you tonight to confirm our time together with one another for tomorrow! You have dried every tear of mine so quick and make me smile bright bright bright... I cannot wait to smile more with you! xx|William<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

[[Image:Suchin 2.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 6:00 pm'''

Hey everyone, I have a major update.

So after my meeting with the supplier, who I sweet talked into giving me a discounted rate, I met up with Suchin for drinks. Let me just say Tomboys and Tomgirls, the photos do not do her justice, she looks absolutely incredible. She gave me some great tips on keeping my pedicures lasting longer, we talked about every subject imaginable, and I hope she doesn't mind me saying this, but I am totally crushing on her right now, and cannot wait to see her again. The drive home from Richmond felt like nothing because of how happy I am right now.

Plus I'll always have this picture to remember our incredible night by.

Tippy<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:33 pm'''

Yes, it very true ! Tippy you steal my heart and not ever let go! I am happy this way. I love sharing all my pretty lingerie with Tippy and I teach my new Tomgirl how to do Thai lap dance. We are so sensual and one. Tippy and I are item now!! NO TOUCHING! Thank you TBS and TGS of Virgina! <3 xoxo|William<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:40 pm'''

Suchin, you catty gal, I thought you were gonna let me announce to the forum that we were an item. It's ok, I still love you. And I can't wait until the next time we're together so I can give you that massage while you play your video games. I've never felt this happy, like this may be the greatest day of my entire life. I've met a lot of girls in my life, but Suchin, you are my woman, my strong, masculine, tomboy woman. I can't wait to see you next weekend, I've already talked to my boss, and I'm getting Friday off so we can spend the whole day together.

I never thought I'd be able to find love on an internet forum, and here we are, happy as can be. Thank you Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virgina, I hope the rest of you find your Tomboys and Tomgirls soon.
|Tippy<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quotebox|It looks like I stand corrected of my suspicions. But with my past experiences, and the too great number of crazy people in the world, we all have to be very cautious. And with that, I apologize for my earlier post and hurting your feelings, Suchin.<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

===Re: Manicure/Pedicure stories?===
{{quotebox|I have colored my nails before, and it is fun to do for a grand outting.

I feel it ill for me to go in for a manicure, not only due to lack of funds, but I am a recovering nail-biter. I even had to have a fingernail replaced in surgery years ago; it is growing in well, even though slower than the other nine.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=37&p=312#p312]</ref>}}

===Re: Mothers===
{{quotebox|My mother has tried to coerce me into going back to [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|briefs]]; Hells No! Panties are far more comfortable And stylish. And I am not going to ever go out without one of my [[muscle bra|sports bras]] again. She even tried to bribe, or wager, me, but I would not take it.

I feel there should be a law requiring all men to wear bras (sports ones at least); I feel grossed out whenever I see some dude walking sround shirtless. ]:(P<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=39&p=315#p315]</ref>}}

===Re: Friendship Issues===
{{quotebox|I'd like to talk a bit about those of us (well, me in particular) who have for real only less than or equal to a handful of friends in person.

Growing up, I have had mostly [[gal-pals|female friends]]. I was considerably blessed, yet I still lack the virgin-breaker moment. The close friendships were great, and I really appreciated them in my heart forever. I really should have tried to get further, but before 21, I was [[naive]] on the subject of dating. There Really should be a manditory [[dating education]] class alongside sex ed.

I have known all of my life that I do get along better with women well over those of my own gender. No personal offense to anyone.

I have a mental flaw, along with other learnings, which has taught me that most of the worldwide male poulation are, pretty much, Uncaring, Violent, Ignorant, Dumb, Boring Jerks. And with that, I feel afraid in meeting most males, because I feel ill of getting too close, because of me getting hurt, or something else god-awful. ]:(

Again, no personal offense is meant to anyone.

My gal pal has informed me that me meeting more women and getting it on is very unlikely if I do not have many dude pals. Nutshell; I would be mistaken for a homo, or too easily [[friend zone|friend-zoned]] by women. This tid bit makes me feel sad.

Open for individual responses from Everyone on this forum.<ref name="Friendship Issues">[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:24 am'''

Aww, that sux!!!! Anyway I met most of my friends back in high school, or college, or at my past jobs. Sometimes it's hard to keep in touch with everybody but that's why the [[Internet]] and phones were invented! A lot of the friends I hang out with now were from my last job. We'd go out for drinks every Thursday, Friday and Saturday and have the grandest of times! Sometimes I still meet up with them, but not every week like I used to.

As for meeting people, I've never really thought about it because I'm not a really shy person. I guess if you strike up conversations based on stuff you like or stuff you notice about them, that's a good start. It's real easy to sit in your room all day and play video games but you just have to talk to people and get out there. Sometimes I'll just go out all by myself and sit someplace nice and quiet and read. If you look cute sometimes people come up and introduce themselves!

But anyway if you haven't done it already you should get on [[Facebook]] and try to find your old friends and tell them what you've been up to since you've last seen them! It's a really easy way to keep in touch with people especially since a lot of people move away right after high school or college. Facebook is like a high school reunion that never ends! (Sorry if I sound like a commercial!) Plus if there's anyone who still lives in Virginia maybe they can introduce you to some of their single friends! Just be yourself and let us know what they say, ok?|BornThisWay<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quotebox|"Social" websites like Facebook and [[MySpace]] are ALL a Joke against socializing. Everybody is on the internet these days. And to Socialize online with total strangers Constantly is an epic fail. That kind of "socializing" on the internet will only result in making people more and more Autistic-Like. Think about it.

The more time we spend in front of an internet screen leads to constant lack of practice in REAL Socializing face to face offline.<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Mike Love » Tue Jun 21, 2011 5:23 am'''

I like Facebook. There's a lot of people I don't nescesarilly talk to a lot, but I like to be able to keep up with what they're doing. Plus it makes it easier to keep track of people's phone numbers. Plus, I know a lot of cute girls, and I like to look at their photos a lot and get ideas on new outfits to wear.
|Mike Love<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quotebox|Just a gosh-darn minute. People Pretend to be Other People online, even Computers have been Programmed to pretend to be People to tease and get personal information from you. And Trolls/Cyber-Bullies Hack into YOUR Facebook and MySpace, rearranging, smearing, soiling with pornographic, most horrible images from the darkest regions of the internet. And they create [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|wiki]] [[CWCki|sites]] and pages of Hate against you soo horrible that Googling your own name results in MILLIONS of hate-filled results.<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Tue Jun 21, 2011 11:53 pm'''

Like I said, it's really, really sad that you're putting your fears in the way of getting in touch with your old friends and establishing new friendships. I'll bet your old friends think about you sometimes and miss you. And like it or not, people use social networking sites to contact people they know in real life to do things in real life. This is the way things are now.

I don't get how somebody who has enough courage to dress up in women's clothing and walk around in public and use the girl's bathroom can be so afraid of somebody making fun of them on the internet. I mean, who would even know who your old friends are? Why would somebody go through the trouble of impersonating them? And wouldn't you like, be able to figure out if it was somebody pretending to be them? I mean their Facebook profile would link back to all their friends and most of their family members. They'd not only have to fool you, but their parents and relatives, who have known them since they were born. Like, if somebody tried to set up a phony profile and pretended to be me just to hate on me, everybody would know that something was off.

So like, you've though about one bad thing that could happen if you tried to look up old friends on Facebook, and just assumed that it will happen. And you said you're afraid of getting to close to males in real life, because you think something bad might happen. It's really easy to worry and make up excuses about why you can't do things, but just know that if you do that anxiety is going to rule your life.

Like I said you believe in yourself enough to admit that you're a Tomgirl and get out there and strut your stuff. Some Tomgirls don't even get that far! Think about how much you've already accomplished before deciding what you can and can't do. You're your own boss and I can't make you do anything, I'm just saying your life would be a lot less lonely if you were open to looking up the old friends you've fallen out of touch with over the years.|BornThisWay<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:31 am'''

Maybe I've just been lucky and haven't met anyone who has lied to me online. I use facebook to keep in contact with the people I'm close to, they've made it so easy to keep track of my friends, why wouldn't I take advantage of it. As far as having problems with meeting anyone online. I met Suchin here on the forum, and I had no trouble meeting up with her. There are always going to be assholes out there Kooky, but you can show them that they are just haters and you aren't going to listen to them.
|Tippy<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:34 am'''
I just use FB in private mode, that way haters can't see what I'm doing and I only have my closest friends on there.
|Thoria<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

At this point Chris loses all self-control and does everything short of posting "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me".

{{quotebox|It's not just THOUGHT, but it HAS happened to me before for real. And if you don't believe, take for example the author of the comic book series featuring that yellow, [[electric hedgehog]]... [[Sonichu]], if I remember correctly.

Before a time, the author had a clean history, then Cyber-Bullies and Trolls attacked him greatly; now Googling his name will result in over a million results of hate and name soiling. Especially from the blackmail and deceptions he had to endure.

I, myself, had a page on Facebook. Things were good for me a while. Then I was attacked in [[2005]] by the Trolls. They pretended to be my closest friends; they got a number of incriminating photos and details from me. They also hacked into my Facebook. It took me over a week before I was able to reset my password and e-mail address. And upon reflection, I closed my Facebook account and left the online socializing for years. It is real, and they are vicious, crazy, wickedly smart people.<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

===Re: Reputation===
In which Chris actually says "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me". He also tries to incite the forum into hacking CWCki for him.

{{quotebox|This Arthur has a good idea with this "[[wikipedia:Denial-of-service attack|DOS]]". He certainly knows more than I have on taking down their Trolling Stupid websites.

My Tomgirl and Tomboy acquaintances, I feel it is time I introduce myself better. I am more than just a Tomgirl. I am the high-functioning autistic person who was heavily emotionally damaged, artistic inspiration lost with paranoia, deception, blackmail and plain hurtful words from those bottom-feeding Trolls. I am the hand-drawing original creator of Sonichu, Rosechu and the city of Cwcville, Virginia, USA.

I am Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, VA.

I had joined this Forum with the opportunity to associate with my own misunderstood kind of people, commonly mistaken for amongst the gays and lesbians. I concealed my identity on here reasonably, prayfully Not to be found by those Trolls.

For Years, I have fallen victim to their trachery. I have tried within my own limited knowledge and technology to counter-attack those fiends. I have mostly failed. And as a result, my reputation on the internet fell deep into their treacherous exaggerations, lies and crap. If I had any knowledge or technology, I would have hacked into and destroy every one of their webpages, servers and whatnot looong ago, but I did and still do not. All I could do in the end was hide in the old-fashioned (as it would appear to be now) world of Real Life, off of the internet. Yet I am one who does not like to be left behind in the modern world.

Also, because of them, it has been Impossible for me to get a job; damned negative background checks. And I would appreciate reducing the results of my full name from over Two Freaking Million results back down to less than 100.

Now that they have found me on here, y'all have been dragged into my darkness; for that, I feel deep shame and regret, and I am really sorry about that.

I am Not the disgruntled, mean or perverted person they have mislabeled of me; I am only a normal, heterosexual, good natured, high-functioning autistic Tomgirl, and I want to be treated like a normal person.

And I wish I do not have to be paranoid of those fiends and their hurtful webpages.<ref name="found out page 2">[http://web.archive.org/web/20110804190802/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=57&start=10] (Archive from 4 Aug 2011)</ref>}}

Unaware of the horrible truth, members promise to help.

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Thu Jul 21, 2011 11:22 pm'''
Well Chris, you won't have to worry about this "CWCki" for much longer. Trust me on that, we'll take care of it. I have a cousin who's into computers and stuff, he took a Computer Science III course. I'll give him a shout and see if he can do something. If I were those trolls I'd be shivering in my boots right now.<ref name="found out page 2" />}}

Chris demonstrates a feeling resembling gratitude, but also seems to be preparing himself to sit down and wait for a solution to come to him.

{{quotebox|Thank you. Any help in this old battle to finally put it to rest would bebgreatly appreciated.

[[Chris and religion|God bless us all]].<ref name="found out page 3">[http://web.archive.org/web/20110804190910/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=57&start=20] (Archive from 4 Aug 2011)</ref>}}

One of them quickly catches up, however:

{{quoteboxred|'''by SexBomb33 » Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:42 am'''
Aren't you going to help us fight ''your'' battle in any way?<ref name="found out page 3" />}}

Chris explains why:

{{quotebox|As I have said before, I have tried on my own to counter-attack, and I still lack knowledge and resourses within my reach to counter-attack properly. And I do not have a functional Personal Computer or a Laptop of any kind. I have been posting from my 3DS internet browser, and it, my Wii, PS3, PSP at my house and one of the computers at the nearby library, which requires Gasoline to get to, are my current ONLY connection methods to the internet.

At this point, technology-wise and mentally autistic with the missing links in my Corpus Callosum, I do not feel fit to be an adaquate leader in taking down the frigging cyber-bullies and trolls.

I do have intel from my own experiences and past research which hopefully can be helpful. I'd recommend starting at [[The GAMe PLACe|the Game & Hobby Place]] in Charlottesville, across from the Omni hotel. I have been banned from there in April, [[2008]] by the [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|cold-hearted]] [[Michael Snyder]]. My family and I know that in a great way, that Place IS a central or focal point of the Trolls' plottings and/or such.

PLUS, it AND the other three associated hobby stores on their same website are ALL owned by a convicted-in-Illinois sex offender, Robert Lightfire. The Place is located across the street from a Public School; morally and legally, the Place should NOT be located there at all. Yet Mr. Lightburn is listed as an Offender in Illinois; he isn't listed in VA. He lives in Madison. I am positive, aside from him being married, Mr. Snyder has his own equatable criminal scandal.

That's all I have for now.<ref name="found out page 3" />}}

Chris will be helped by TRUE and HONEST people in this fight. As in, they will do it for him if he can help (i.e., never)

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Fri Jul 29, 2011 1:21 am'''
Don't worry about it, Chris. I'm sure Thoria's cousin can help you out. He's been good to me in the past I'm sure that he's an Honest and Helpful fellow.

I'm sure that you'll be free of those trolls soon and I'm glad that you've trusted us with this. You're a good friend. Thoria's cousin has enough tech ability. He can walk you through it as long as you have the intel and can help him out a little bit.<ref name="found out page 3" />}}

==See also==
*[[Sonichu Girls]]
*[[Tomgirl Pictures]]
*[[Trollin' Train]]

==References==
<references/>

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Homos]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia

2014-08-24T11:28:05Z

MindHit: /* Re: Introductions! */

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Template:DeadLinks}}
'''Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia''' is a defunct forum that was established in late [[April 2011]] and ceased to exist later that year<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20111028013842/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/] (Archive from 28 Oct 2011)</ref>. [[Chris]] was posting as himself under the alias "Kookydashy". This resulted in several stories of his exploits as a [[tomgirl]] that, to say the least, made the effort of tracking him down more than worth it. Chris posted on and off, trying his best to conceal his identity in the most obvious way possible. Below are his T&ToV posts, with blue representing Chris's posts and red representing posts in the threads he was responding to.

== Posts ==
===Re: Introductions!===
In which Chris openly announces he is Christian Weston Chandler as much as he can without actually saying it.

[[Image:ponyboy.jpg|thumb|[[My Little Pony|Kookydashy]]: Interests include [[Plush Breasts of Fail|breasts]], [[China|pussy]], and [[Autism Awareness E-mails|autism awareness]].]]

{{quotebox|Hello, fellow tomgirls. :)

Y'all may address me by my screen name in the board talk. I like [[Chris and Music|music]], [[Kaka Makeup Basics|makeup]], [[Chris and Fashion|dressin' up]] in my mini, [[Mass Debating|havin' fun]] 'n hangin' with my [[Gal-pals|girlfriend]]s, [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|karaoke]], [[video games]], crafting and [[art]].

I am also [[Lies|empathetic]], so [[Autism|I can understand others people's feelings]], as well as my own. I am a dynamic, complex individual.

I do not have many [[jerks|dude pals]], because I have my own mental hang-ups against the majority of them; Nothing Personal. I have a history of being bullied by some mean brutes, as well as [[homos|homosexuals]], over the [[internet]]. Cyber-Bullies/[[Trolls]]/Anons are a hot button with me. I prefer not to discuss that issue further.

And I am an all-around good, [[death threats|friendly]], [[List of Chris's lies|honest]], [[Vibrator|heterosexual]] tomgirl.

Thank you all for offering me respect, as I respect each of you and your opinions on the board.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=2&p=157#p157]</ref>}}

===Re: Coming out to my parents===
In this thread, Chris opened up about his parents' feelings in regards to his newfound fetish.

{{quotebox|Y'all are singin' my song; my [[Barb|mom]] and [[Bob|dad]] were shocked bad when I told them I was a tomgirl. Soo Literally old-fasioned (they're both [[Chris and English|seinors]]). My mom said "I didn't raise a daughter", and my father threw the damned "fag" card at me.

I will Always be Straight, Mom and Dad; give me some faith and trust.

What a world with outside influances to put great paranoia in our families.

Also, try looking up "tomgirl" on [[Wikipedia]]; it redirects to "effeminancy". While effeminancy is true for us, I feel the contents of that page is against us, due to it addressing the [[homos]].

Someone needs to undo the redirects, edit the grammer errors in "tomgirl"`s original edit, and add a ton more detail to it.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&p=160#p160]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|My mom is still giving me complaints and nit-picks about me wearing my feminine attire. I wish I could just up and move out and not have to deal with my family; I don't know too many other people here in C-Ville, and those I do know I'm only acquainted with or know little about them for only a few weeks.

Plus finding employment is hard. I got a [[CADD|fancy computer degree]] from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|community college]], and there have been very slim pickings from it. Already Taken; Quota's Filled; yada, yada, yada.

Plus also, she keeps throwing disbelief towards us by stating "Tomgirls aren't real"; SHE'S a Tomboy; what a bunch of 1940's old-fashioned crap. Plus she watches too much current news, and she is soo paranoid and shit.

I wish I could afford to move out, but I can't afford it [[monthly tugboat|financially]], [[Autism|mentally]] and [[Chris and anger|emotionally]]. Fucking [[stress|pisses me off.]]<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&start=20]</ref>}}

===Re: Girly Things Tee Hee===

{{quotebox|After I realized my tomgirly ways, and starting dressing up in my skirts, I started feeling discomfort in using the Men's restroom. I asked my closest [[gal pal]] if it would be going too far in using the Ladies' room; she told me to go with my feelings. My next skirted outting, I used the ladies' room, and I squatted, holding my [[duck|arrow]] down over the john (so I would be less likely to soil my skirt); it felt good and Right. Days later, though, after 4 more lady trips; a woman complains and tattles on me, and a stereotypical [[jerk|Brute male]] shouts me out. I felt embarassed. When in skirt, I am still gonna go to the Ladies, because there is no goin' back for me.

[[Rape|Heck, I would not hold it against a tomboy who felt more comfort in using the Men's room over the Ladies']].

As truest Tomgirls, we do respect greatly the women as equals. [[lie|I would never look]] or anything of the sort.

Open for your thoughts.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|I've recently got into the original Squinkies, they are so cute and cool. And their gumball-machine dispensing playsets are neat. I like the cupcake-shaped one. And they're also coming out with Squinkie cars for Hot Wheels and Cars 2; little Squinkie people now have cool wheels to drive.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&start=10]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|Something else girly I enjoy danglin' around where I go is my ankle bracelet. It's a silver chain with sections of 4 silver beads, and I've added three stars on chains onto the hook. I never take it off, because it is an awesome and cute jewelry, plus it is difficult to put it back on. LOL

I also am enjoying the "Mighty Milky Way" DSiWare game on my [[Nintendo|3DS]]. Luna is a cute, sexy gal, and the method of guiding her from planet to planet is neat.

Anyone else on here with a 3DS may add me onto y'all's Friend List with my code, 2836-0121-9073. Please P.M. me with your 3DS F.C. in response if y'all add me.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=382#p382]</ref>}}

===Re: Homosexuals===
[[Image:TG20.jpg|thumb|Hear that, homos? Chris is offended by your flamboyance!]]
{{quotebox|I do not care much for the [[homosexual]] males either. I mean, I really feel offended when they get soo flamboyant with their ways and such, it's like they're shoving it in your face. Plus, most of the Cyber-Bullies who gave me grief were homos [[Jack Thaddeus|themselves]], placing their damn label onto me wrongfully.

[[Magi-Chan|As long as they each keep it to themselves and behind closed doors, I won't bother them]].<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

===Re: July Meetup===

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Sun May 29, 2011 9:58 pm'''

That's right, everyone. It's that time again. Time to plan our big meet up for July. We're currently looking to meet up somewhere that's kinda central and should be easy for everyone.

First off, remember to dress your best. I'm going to wear my old dress uniform like normal but if you'd like to give us a sneak peak of your outfit, please feel free to do so here.

Also, any suggestions for Date / Time / Location is welcome.

Looking forward to seeing everyone there!|DanielleTheRiveter<ref name="July Meetup">[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=27&p=229#p229]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|How about at the [[Two's_company_snapshots|Applebees]] next to Toys 'R' Us on Branchlands Lane on a Monday; at 9 PM, they have Karaokee night there. Meet and greet first and sing-along after.<ref name="July Meetup" />}}

===Re: FUKKEN HATERSSSssssssssss===
In which Chris fantasizes about an unrealistic encounter with a "hater", then throws in some unintelligible [[Random-access humor|RAH]].

{{quotebox|I would generally ignore the haters' hurtful comments and move forward too. But if they are really in my face calling me gay or telling me [[virgin|I won't be geeting a woman]], I would tell them like it is in my miniskirt, "All I have to do is lift up my skirt and I'll be up your woman's biz in seconds." :)<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=32&p=291#p291]</ref>}}

===Re: What part of Virginia are you from?===

{{quotebox|Charlottesville is my city of stompin' ground; it can stand some improvement, though. More excitement, and maybe a strip club or two. LOL.

I've also resided in Midlothian for my Middle and [[High School]] years.<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20110722211606/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=35&p=292] (Archive from 22 Jul 2011)</ref>}}

===Re: 10 interesting facts about you!===
Unsurprisingly the most bland, useless information is considered by Chris to be an "interesting fact".

{{quotebox|[[Autism|1.]] I like to take my time to think of how I feel about the current topic, as well as responding in discussion.

[[Lie|2.]] I am empathetic.

[[Fat|3.]] I appreciate how the fast food places wised up and started offering apple slices as a healthier option after decades of fried potatoes.

[[Trolls|4.]] With my history of being trolled and online coomunicating, I feel online socializing only makes people more autistic-like. People need to wise up and go back to feeling comfortable socializing in person.

[[Cwcsicle|5.]] I have sassy, fun ideas sometimes.

[[Sonichu|6.]] I am good at hand-drawing, coloring and story creating.

[[Manchester High School|7.]] I have had happy years in High School.

[[Autism|8.]] I try to be cautious of other people's intentions and feelings while communicating and coping with them.

[[Lie|9.]] I am technologically and musically inclined.

[[Chris and Art|10.]] I enjoy tinkering and creating when I feel inspired.<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20110722211622/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=34&p=293] (Archive from 22 Jul 2011)</ref>}}

===Re: tomboy looking 4 tomgirl===
[[Image:Suchin.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Sun May 29, 2011 2:44 am'''

hello my name is suchin and i am originally from thailand. my friends call me william or will because i am rowdy and like to have fun i am looking for tomgirl to treat me right. i work in manicure salon now and i love beauty on my men and dirt on me

[image]

this is me. what is you? lets meet up and exchange details. i am from richmond but will be in charlottesville for the 4th of july. i love freedom now too.
your turn now! fi dorrar. sacki aur bunti. PLEASE send me a message!|William<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl">[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|There is a pretty face, lovely head of [[hair]] and [[Women's Rights|a nice rack]] in the photo. But I feel I have to interject here.

How do we know you are really that woman, or are you really some immature, trolling stupid brat trying to stir trouble on our forum? People have done that sort of thing over the internet; I fell victim to communicating with such people. And from that, I have learned to keep most personal things offline and to myself.

Anyway, I am not going to fall for such an obvious facade, and I wish to prevent anyone else from finding such gross disappointment and disaster.

Fess up, man.<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:27 am '''

Hey I'm going to be down in Richmond tomorrow anyway, I think you're pretty cute so I'd like to meet up if possible.

I understand if this is kind of sudden, but when I saw that picture I just knew I had to meet this woman.|Tippy<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:33 am'''

kookydashy your comment make me so sad? i work so hard on my body to be my tomboy self and i am so tired of others putting me down for me being me. sometimes i think it because they jealous but for you to accuse me of being troll, someting i hate most in whole american world, make me cry some. this remind me of my sister telling me i cannot wear pants because i am woman. i can wear pants AND NOT BE MAN OR UGLY!!!!

as for Tippy, you sound so nice. I would love to meet a creature like you in reality world! i would even love to do your hair and nails and so much more... I am excite now! Yes! Please! I get out of work at around six. Can we do drinkies than??
|William<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:38 am'''

OMG that's perfect, I'm supposed to have an early dinner meeting with a supplier, so I will be free right around six. I'll private message you my cell number and other info so we can exchange our numbers and stuff. I am so excited, I cannot wait. I will be counting down the hours till we meet up my Tomboy dream. We'll have drinks, and maybe dessert ;). Hehehehe|Tippy<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:44 am'''

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Sawatdee kaa!! <3 You are true lady AND gentleman! I will call you tonight to confirm our time together with one another for tomorrow! You have dried every tear of mine so quick and make me smile bright bright bright... I cannot wait to smile more with you! xx|William<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

[[Image:Suchin 2.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 6:00 pm'''

Hey everyone, I have a major update.

So after my meeting with the supplier, who I sweet talked into giving me a discounted rate, I met up with Suchin for drinks. Let me just say Tomboys and Tomgirls, the photos do not do her justice, she looks absolutely incredible. She gave me some great tips on keeping my pedicures lasting longer, we talked about every subject imaginable, and I hope she doesn't mind me saying this, but I am totally crushing on her right now, and cannot wait to see her again. The drive home from Richmond felt like nothing because of how happy I am right now.

Plus I'll always have this picture to remember our incredible night by.

Tippy<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:33 pm'''

Yes, it very true ! Tippy you steal my heart and not ever let go! I am happy this way. I love sharing all my pretty lingerie with Tippy and I teach my new Tomgirl how to do Thai lap dance. We are so sensual and one. Tippy and I are item now!! NO TOUCHING! Thank you TBS and TGS of Virgina! <3 xoxo|William<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:40 pm'''

Suchin, you catty gal, I thought you were gonna let me announce to the forum that we were an item. It's ok, I still love you. And I can't wait until the next time we're together so I can give you that massage while you play your video games. I've never felt this happy, like this may be the greatest day of my entire life. I've met a lot of girls in my life, but Suchin, you are my woman, my strong, masculine, tomboy woman. I can't wait to see you next weekend, I've already talked to my boss, and I'm getting Friday off so we can spend the whole day together.

I never thought I'd be able to find love on an internet forum, and here we are, happy as can be. Thank you Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virgina, I hope the rest of you find your Tomboys and Tomgirls soon.
|Tippy<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

{{quotebox|It looks like I stand corrected of my suspicions. But with my past experiences, and the too great number of crazy people in the world, we all have to be very cautious. And with that, I apologize for my earlier post and hurting your feelings, Suchin.<ref name="tomboy looking 4 tomgirl" />}}

===Re: Manicure/Pedicure stories?===
{{quotebox|I have colored my nails before, and it is fun to do for a grand outting.

I feel it ill for me to go in for a manicure, not only due to lack of funds, but I am a recovering nail-biter. I even had to have a fingernail replaced in surgery years ago; it is growing in well, even though slower than the other nine.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=37&p=312#p312]</ref>}}

===Re: Mothers===
{{quotebox|My mother has tried to coerce me into going back to [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|briefs]]; Hells No! Panties are far more comfortable And stylish. And I am not going to ever go out without one of my [[muscle bra|sports bras]] again. She even tried to bribe, or wager, me, but I would not take it.

I feel there should be a law requiring all men to wear bras (sports ones at least); I feel grossed out whenever I see some dude walking sround shirtless. ]:(P<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=39&p=315#p315]</ref>}}

===Re: Friendship Issues===
{{quotebox|I'd like to talk a bit about those of us (well, me in particular) who have for real only less than or equal to a handful of friends in person.

Growing up, I have had mostly [[gal-pals|female friends]]. I was considerably blessed, yet I still lack the virgin-breaker moment. The close friendships were great, and I really appreciated them in my heart forever. I really should have tried to get further, but before 21, I was [[naive]] on the subject of dating. There Really should be a manditory [[dating education]] class alongside sex ed.

I have known all of my life that I do get along better with women well over those of my own gender. No personal offense to anyone.

I have a mental flaw, along with other learnings, which has taught me that most of the worldwide male poulation are, pretty much, Uncaring, Violent, Ignorant, Dumb, Boring Jerks. And with that, I feel afraid in meeting most males, because I feel ill of getting too close, because of me getting hurt, or something else god-awful. ]:(

Again, no personal offense is meant to anyone.

My gal pal has informed me that me meeting more women and getting it on is very unlikely if I do not have many dude pals. Nutshell; I would be mistaken for a homo, or too easily [[friend zone|friend-zoned]] by women. This tid bit makes me feel sad.

Open for individual responses from Everyone on this forum.<ref name="Friendship Issues">[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:24 am'''

Aww, that sux!!!! Anyway I met most of my friends back in high school, or college, or at my past jobs. Sometimes it's hard to keep in touch with everybody but that's why the [[Internet]] and phones were invented! A lot of the friends I hang out with now were from my last job. We'd go out for drinks every Thursday, Friday and Saturday and have the grandest of times! Sometimes I still meet up with them, but not every week like I used to.

As for meeting people, I've never really thought about it because I'm not a really shy person. I guess if you strike up conversations based on stuff you like or stuff you notice about them, that's a good start. It's real easy to sit in your room all day and play video games but you just have to talk to people and get out there. Sometimes I'll just go out all by myself and sit someplace nice and quiet and read. If you look cute sometimes people come up and introduce themselves!

But anyway if you haven't done it already you should get on [[Facebook]] and try to find your old friends and tell them what you've been up to since you've last seen them! It's a really easy way to keep in touch with people especially since a lot of people move away right after high school or college. Facebook is like a high school reunion that never ends! (Sorry if I sound like a commercial!) Plus if there's anyone who still lives in Virginia maybe they can introduce you to some of their single friends! Just be yourself and let us know what they say, ok?|BornThisWay<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quotebox|"Social" websites like Facebook and [[MySpace]] are ALL a Joke against socializing. Everybody is on the internet these days. And to Socialize online with total strangers Constantly is an epic fail. That kind of "socializing" on the internet will only result in making people more and more Autistic-Like. Think about it.

The more time we spend in front of an internet screen leads to constant lack of practice in REAL Socializing face to face offline.<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Mike Love » Tue Jun 21, 2011 5:23 am'''

I like Facebook. There's a lot of people I don't nescesarilly talk to a lot, but I like to be able to keep up with what they're doing. Plus it makes it easier to keep track of people's phone numbers. Plus, I know a lot of cute girls, and I like to look at their photos a lot and get ideas on new outfits to wear.
|Mike Love<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quotebox|Just a gosh-darn minute. People Pretend to be Other People online, even Computers have been Programmed to pretend to be People to tease and get personal information from you. And Trolls/Cyber-Bullies Hack into YOUR Facebook and MySpace, rearranging, smearing, soiling with pornographic, most horrible images from the darkest regions of the internet. And they create [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|wiki]] [[CWCki|sites]] and pages of Hate against you soo horrible that Googling your own name results in MILLIONS of hate-filled results.<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Tue Jun 21, 2011 11:53 pm'''

Like I said, it's really, really sad that you're putting your fears in the way of getting in touch with your old friends and establishing new friendships. I'll bet your old friends think about you sometimes and miss you. And like it or not, people use social networking sites to contact people they know in real life to do things in real life. This is the way things are now.

I don't get how somebody who has enough courage to dress up in women's clothing and walk around in public and use the girl's bathroom can be so afraid of somebody making fun of them on the internet. I mean, who would even know who your old friends are? Why would somebody go through the trouble of impersonating them? And wouldn't you like, be able to figure out if it was somebody pretending to be them? I mean their Facebook profile would link back to all their friends and most of their family members. They'd not only have to fool you, but their parents and relatives, who have known them since they were born. Like, if somebody tried to set up a phony profile and pretended to be me just to hate on me, everybody would know that something was off.

So like, you've though about one bad thing that could happen if you tried to look up old friends on Facebook, and just assumed that it will happen. And you said you're afraid of getting to close to males in real life, because you think something bad might happen. It's really easy to worry and make up excuses about why you can't do things, but just know that if you do that anxiety is going to rule your life.

Like I said you believe in yourself enough to admit that you're a Tomgirl and get out there and strut your stuff. Some Tomgirls don't even get that far! Think about how much you've already accomplished before deciding what you can and can't do. You're your own boss and I can't make you do anything, I'm just saying your life would be a lot less lonely if you were open to looking up the old friends you've fallen out of touch with over the years.|BornThisWay<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:31 am'''

Maybe I've just been lucky and haven't met anyone who has lied to me online. I use facebook to keep in contact with the people I'm close to, they've made it so easy to keep track of my friends, why wouldn't I take advantage of it. As far as having problems with meeting anyone online. I met Suchin here on the forum, and I had no trouble meeting up with her. There are always going to be assholes out there Kooky, but you can show them that they are just haters and you aren't going to listen to them.
|Tippy<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:34 am'''
I just use FB in private mode, that way haters can't see what I'm doing and I only have my closest friends on there.
|Thoria<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

At this point Chris loses all self-control and does everything short of posting "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me".

{{quotebox|It's not just THOUGHT, but it HAS happened to me before for real. And if you don't believe, take for example the author of the comic book series featuring that yellow, [[electric hedgehog]]... [[Sonichu]], if I remember correctly.

Before a time, the author had a clean history, then Cyber-Bullies and Trolls attacked him greatly; now Googling his name will result in over a million results of hate and name soiling. Especially from the blackmail and deceptions he had to endure.

I, myself, had a page on Facebook. Things were good for me a while. Then I was attacked in [[2005]] by the Trolls. They pretended to be my closest friends; they got a number of incriminating photos and details from me. They also hacked into my Facebook. It took me over a week before I was able to reset my password and e-mail address. And upon reflection, I closed my Facebook account and left the online socializing for years. It is real, and they are vicious, crazy, wickedly smart people.<ref name="Friendship Issues" />}}

===Re: Reputation===
In which Chris actually says "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me". He also tries to incite the forum into hacking CWCki for him.

{{quotebox|This Arthur has a good idea with this "[[wikipedia:Denial-of-service attack|DOS]]". He certainly knows more than I have on taking down their Trolling Stupid websites.

My Tomgirl and Tomboy acquaintances, I feel it is time I introduce myself better. I am more than just a Tomgirl. I am the high-functioning autistic person who was heavily emotionally damaged, artistic inspiration lost with paranoia, deception, blackmail and plain hurtful words from those bottom-feeding Trolls. I am the hand-drawing original creator of Sonichu, Rosechu and the city of Cwcville, Virginia, USA.

I am Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, VA.

I had joined this Forum with the opportunity to associate with my own misunderstood kind of people, commonly mistaken for amongst the gays and lesbians. I concealed my identity on here reasonably, prayfully Not to be found by those Trolls.

For Years, I have fallen victim to their trachery. I have tried within my own limited knowledge and technology to counter-attack those fiends. I have mostly failed. And as a result, my reputation on the internet fell deep into their treacherous exaggerations, lies and crap. If I had any knowledge or technology, I would have hacked into and destroy every one of their webpages, servers and whatnot looong ago, but I did and still do not. All I could do in the end was hide in the old-fashioned (as it would appear to be now) world of Real Life, off of the internet. Yet I am one who does not like to be left behind in the modern world.

Also, because of them, it has been Impossible for me to get a job; damned negative background checks. And I would appreciate reducing the results of my full name from over Two Freaking Million results back down to less than 100.

Now that they have found me on here, y'all have been dragged into my darkness; for that, I feel deep shame and regret, and I am really sorry about that.

I am Not the disgruntled, mean or perverted person they have mislabeled of me; I am only a normal, heterosexual, good natured, high-functioning autistic Tomgirl, and I want to be treated like a normal person.

And I wish I do not have to be paranoid of those fiends and their hurtful webpages.<ref name="found out page 2">[http://web.archive.org/web/20110804190802/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=57&start=10] (Archive from 4 Aug 2011)</ref>}}

Unaware of the horrible truth, members promise to help.

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Thu Jul 21, 2011 11:22 pm'''
Well Chris, you won't have to worry about this "CWCki" for much longer. Trust me on that, we'll take care of it. I have a cousin who's into computers and stuff, he took a Computer Science III course. I'll give him a shout and see if he can do something. If I were those trolls I'd be shivering in my boots right now.<ref name="found out page 2" />}}

Chris demonstrates a feeling resembling gratitude, but also seems to be preparing himself to sit down and wait for a solution to come to him.

{{quotebox|Thank you. Any help in this old battle to finally put it to rest would bebgreatly appreciated.

[[Chris and religion|God bless us all]].<ref name="found out page 3">[http://web.archive.org/web/20110804190910/http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=57&start=20] (Archive from 4 Aug 2011)</ref>}}

One of them quickly catches up, however:

{{quoteboxred|'''by SexBomb33 » Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:42 am'''
Aren't you going to help us fight ''your'' battle in any way?<ref name="found out page 3" />}}

Chris explains why:

{{quotebox|As I have said before, I have tried on my own to counter-attack, and I still lack knowledge and resourses within my reach to counter-attack properly. And I do not have a functional Personal Computer or a Laptop of any kind. I have been posting from my 3DS internet browser, and it, my Wii, PS3, PSP at my house and one of the computers at the nearby library, which requires Gasoline to get to, are my current ONLY connection methods to the internet.

At this point, technology-wise and mentally autistic with the missing links in my Corpus Callosum, I do not feel fit to be an adaquate leader in taking down the frigging cyber-bullies and trolls.

I do have intel from my own experiences and past research which hopefully can be helpful. I'd recommend starting at [[The GAMe PLACe|the Game & Hobby Place]] in Charlottesville, across from the Omni hotel. I have been banned from there in April, [[2008]] by the [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|cold-hearted]] [[Michael Snyder]]. My family and I know that in a great way, that Place IS a central or focal point of the Trolls' plottings and/or such.

PLUS, it AND the other three associated hobby stores on their same website are ALL owned by a convicted-in-Illinois sex offender, Robert Lightfire. The Place is located across the street from a Public School; morally and legally, the Place should NOT be located there at all. Yet Mr. Lightburn is listed as an Offender in Illinois; he isn't listed in VA. He lives in Madison. I am positive, aside from him being married, Mr. Snyder has his own equatable criminal scandal.

That's all I have for now.<ref name="found out page 3" />}}

Chris will be helped by TRUE and HONEST people in this fight. As in, they will do it for him if he can help (i.e., never)

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Fri Jul 29, 2011 1:21 am'''
Don't worry about it, Chris. I'm sure Thoria's cousin can help you out. He's been good to me in the past I'm sure that he's an Honest and Helpful fellow.

I'm sure that you'll be free of those trolls soon and I'm glad that you've trusted us with this. You're a good friend. Thoria's cousin has enough tech ability. He can walk you through it as long as you have the intel and can help him out a little bit.<ref name="found out page 3" />}}

==See also==
*[[Sonichu Girls]]
*[[Tomgirl Pictures]]
*[[Trollin' Train]]

==References==
<references/>

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Homos]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Chris and his ego

2014-08-22T15:00:48Z

MindHit: /* Hubris: the pride before the fall */ Unnecessarely repeated word.

{{quote|Firstly, YOU WISH YOU WERE ME...|Chris, [[Mailbag 10#Rejected Mailbag|Mailbag 10 (Rejected)]]}}
{{quote|For every one that exalteth himself shall be humbled; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.|[[Chris and religion|Luke 14:11 (King James Version)]], really hitting the nail on the head}}
[[File:CWCnormanrockwell.jpg|thumb|right|Pretty much a perfect rendition of our beloved author.]]
'''Egotism''', out of all of [[Chris]]'s flaws, is the most important and self-destructive. It is this egotism that may one day lead to someone playing [[Kick the Autistic]] in real life.

[[Image:SchuComic0P44.jpg|thumb|'''egotism''', (noun): the belief that your pain (getting kicked out of the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|mall]] for being creepy) trumps all others (divorce and loss of beloved wife, children and home)]]

==Origins==
{{Quote|When you don't have people in your life pushing you, can you push yourself?|[[Wikipedia:Tori Amos|Tori Amos]]}}
Why is Chris such an egotist? In his sheltered childhood, his enabling parents taught him to shift blame for all of his troubles to other people. A sense of entitlement, again home-grown, skewed his perception of the proportionality between his [[Stress|problems]] and those of other people. Chris doesn't completely lack empathy; he isn't a sociopath, but the internal 'scale' by which he weighs the importance of himself against that of others tilts far in his favor. The problem was compounded by his [[autism]], making it difficult for him to understand social cues and relate normally to his peers. [[Chris_and_reality#Outside_of_the_comics|He grew up in a different world.]]

But that explains why Chris ''was'' an egotist, ''struggled with'' egotism, or ''has tendencies towards'' egotism. While Chris's childhood was less than ideal, it shouldn't have been quite so crippling. Time and experience should have helped temper his ego, and his [[Cole Smithey|half-brother]] supposedly suffered far worse and still managed to make something of himself. But Chris's development appears to have completely stopped altogether. Chris is still an egotist because he lives in a social time capsule that has allowed him to carry on for the better part of a decade without a single life lesson. And he still lives in that time capsule because it is easy, it is comfortable, and [[Anna McLerran|people]] [[William Elliott Waterman|let]] [[White knights|him]].

===The enablers===

[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|Exhibit A]]

{{quote|Drunk or not, they had me. At an old age where my mother was so close to menopause and my father was a senior citizen. [[Chris and Reality|I was truly a miracle]].|Chris, [[Mumble 3]]}}
Chris's parents are enablers ''par excellence''. There is no earthly reason why (barring unrelated catastrophes) a thirty-year-old man with autism should live at home with his parents, especially when his autism is as "[[Slow-in-the-mind|high functioning]]" as Chris's activity and his documentation exemplify it to be. Adults with far more crippling mental health problems, from emotional disorders to mental retardation, live far more independently than Chris does.

For children like Chris, special education in public school is generally geared toward helping the child understand how their disorder affects their lives, and what strategies they can use to minimize its impact. This is a well-documented and well-supported strategy, but it relies on "buy-in." Chris's parents clearly never bought into these strategies, because they never fostered any interest in instilling any form of independence in Chris, thus undermining the entire regimen of special education and ending up with a man-child with entitlement issues.

===Monthly tugboat===

{{Main|Chris and money}}

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job.|Chris, taking pride in being a lazy fuck.}}

Chris receives welfare from the government; a [[monthly tugboat|"monthly tugboat"]] as he calls it. Although intended for people who were unable to work, Chris continues to abuse the welfare system because he is simply unwilling to work on anything except [[mass debating]], playing [[Video games]], and [[Love Quest|stalking young women.]]

Regardless of whether Chris is abusing the welfare system, his parents are abusing it through him, or the system itself is flawed, the fact remains that the monthly tugboat that he receives is a major factor in making Chris's lifestyle — and thus his world view — sustainable.

===Blind luck and the cherry picking fallacy===

[[Image:SlamAttack.jpg|thumb|Local Boy Levels Up]]
[[Image:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg|thumb|left|Article in PVCC's ''Forum'', proof that some people have too much time on their hands]]
[[Image:Famewhore.jpg|thumb|McIntire Park]]

A [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes|contest]] or [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|two]] here; a [[Chris Chan in the PokéNews|two-second local TV blip]] there. The results are that outside events most people never experience have stroked Chris's already monstrous ego.

Consider that Chris has produced a ''huge'' volume of fan mail, letters-to-the-editor, [[Internet]] commentary, and other drivel. Each letter to [[Nintendo]] is a message in a bottle: most of them never return, but the one that does—on an official letterhead, and addressed to Mr. C. W. Chandler—is confirmation of his celebrity.<ref>[[An Official Sonichu Update]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Yeah...it says here that, uh, yeah...they—th—it goes on to say that:

:"Nintendo of America has some of the most devoted, enthusiastic fans of any game developer. Each week, they receive, uh, hundreds of thousands of suggestions about their games and systems. While they would love to, uh, use ideas from f—fa—from fans to develop actual products, due to the volume of the, uh, requests they receive and the resources it would take to process them, they do not accept unsolicited game or product ideas. But they are committed to being at the leading edge of game and hardware development, though, and they can be sure that they are constantly at work developing new and exciting products and game ideas."

Now, uh, here's the interesting part...where they quote about how I can actually...go further about ch—about them changing their minds and actually accepting the idea and helping me, uh, makin' it—makin' it totally real...with the video games and the TV animations and the action figures, and...officially-released—my personally-approved... medals... ''[...]'' they say that, uh, the best way to let other fans know about my idea or to generate hype about the future game I'd like to see is to post the ideas to the forums on their sites.}} 

[[Honor roll|The concept of form letters does not seem to occur to Chris]], who seems to think the letter was written specifically for him. As if Chris didn't think his material was golden to begin with, he got a second nod from ''Nintendo Power'' for his epic [[Animal Crossing Documentary]], and a page in [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]]'s ''Forum'' is just icing on the cake. Even before his e-fame, Chris had plenty of evidence to convince himself that he ''was'' creative, and not just a high-volume, whiny jerk that had pestered his way to acknowledgement. As he graduated from PVCC in [[2006]], his writing shows that [[Sonichu]] was, in his mind, already tested: there was just some small threshold of notoriety or connections that needed to be breached, in order to become a true media sensation.

On top of that, Chris has a huge amount of free time to inject himself into situations like the [[McIntire Park]] meetings, which allows him to cherry-pick more moments of recognition. A tongue-in-cheek acknowledgement by the local council seems cute to us, but is serious business to him. And since Chris cherry-picks only the reinforcement that he wants, his legions of [[troll]]s just add to the fire. Delusion led him to believe that he had a legion of fans, for a time; a few hundred emails in his inbox confirmed it.

==Narcissistic personality disorder==

[[Image:Narcissus.jpg|thumb|A TRUE and HONEST depiction of Narcissism.]]

It's entirely possible however, that Chris suffers from [[Wikipedia:Narcissistic personality disorder|Narcissistic personality disorder]], whose diagnosis criteria detail many of the characteristics that Chris exhibits.

{{quotebox|The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders fourth edition, DSM IV-TR, a widely used manual for diagnosing mental disorders, defines narcissistic personality disorder (in Axis II Cluster B) as:

A pervasive pattern of [[CWCville|grandiosity]] (in fantasy or behavior), [[True and Loyal Fanbase|need]] [[Love Quest|for]] [[Barbara Chandler|admiration]], and [[Autism|lack]] [[Chris and remorse|of]] [[Chris and death|empathy]], beginning by [[PVCC|early adulthood]] and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

1. Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., [[Chris and art|exaggerates]] [[Honor roll|achievements]] [[CADD|and]] [[Sonichu (comic)|talents]], expects to be recognized as superior without [[China|commensurate achievements]]).

2. Is preoccupied with [[Dreams|fantasies]] of [[Sonichu (comic)|unlimited success]], [[CWCville|power]], [[Honor roll|brilliance]], [[Chris and fashion|beauty]], or [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|ideal love]].

3. Believes that he or she is [[Autism|"special"]] and [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|unique]] and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or [[Shigeru Miyamoto|high-status people]]. (or [[Chris and the industry|institutions]])

4. Requires excessive [[True and Loyal Fanbase|admiration]].

5. Has a sense of [[Barbara Chandler|entitlement]], i.e., unreasonable expectations of [[Hanky panky|especially]] [[Honor roll|favorable]] treatment or [[Alec_Benson_Leary_calls|automatic compliance with his or her expectations]].

6. is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., [[Cole Smithey|takes advantage of others]] to achieve his or her [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|own ends]].

7. [[Chris and death|lacks empathy]]: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the [[Megan Schroeder|feelings and needs]] [[The Wallflower|of others]].

8. is [[Adam Stackhouse|often envious of others]] or believes [[JERKS|others]] are [[Kick the Autistic|envious]] of him or her.

9. shows [[Mailbag|arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes]].}}

As you can see, these criteria describe Chris, right down to the sense of entitlement. Then again, many of the symptoms described match a typical diagnosis of autism. He may have both. [http://samvak.tripod.com/journal72.html Further reading is required to confirm the difference.]

==Manifestations==

Chris's egotism manifests itself in many ways.

===Unwarranted self-importance===

[[Image:Apology to Mary Lee.jpg|thumb|Very gracious.]]
{{See also|True and Loyal Fanbase}}

{{quote|I have had way over a million fans worldwide since I went online in before [[2000]].|-Chris, [[Mailbag 48]]}}

As overwhelming as Chris's unwarranted self-importance is, it's easy for the novice [[troll|observer]] to get lost in the sea of [[Sonichu]] shit and assume that he's just confident in his e-fame. "Of course," you say, "he's got a billion hits on [[YouTube]] and a thousand emails in his mailbox. He's going to think he's hot shit, like every other retard on the [[DeviantArt|internet]]."

But nothing sums up Chris's deep and abiding USI like this missive to [[Mary Lee Walsh]]:<ref>[[Mary Lee Walsh#Emails with Mary|Emails with Mary]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Mary, I've slept on it, and [[Chris's Wikipedia profile#The Continuing, Enduring Search|I have realized that note-hanging is not the way to get attention]]. And I don't really want to meet with either you nor Susan, no offense. I'll tell you what, let's forget the meeting, and if you will allow my newsletter to stay in distribution, I will do all of the following:

*I will never hang notes on the wall again.
*I'll consider stopping my Silent Treatment on Susan.
*I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my [[scale of Respect]] each by 2 points (0=No Respect...10=Respect).

Please reply via E-Mail.

Christian C.}}

E-fame just adds a whole new dimension. He was a misunderstood genius before; now he's a misunderstood genius with a personal army:

{{quote|III'M. WOR-KIN'. ON IT! LET ME DO THAT STUPID VIDEO SO I CAN TELL [[True and Loyal Fanbase|E'RRYBODY, IN MY COMMAND]], TO GET EVERYTHIN'- HELP ME GET EVERYTHIN' OFF THE INTERNET!|Chris, [[THAT IS MY HOUSE]]}}

It's so bad now that when Chris meets someone new who claims not to know who he is, he seems skeptical and surprised.<ref>Exchange with the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]], [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Meet the Pickle .2801:21:44 - 01:25:29.29|Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

{{quote|Y'all should know me by now, but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, back on March 17th, 2000.|Chris, in his [[CWC's Second Message|second YouTube video]]}}

The instant gratification, instant acknowledgment, and instant attention — good or bad — that has come with his minor e-fame of the last few years has thoroughly convinced Chris that people ''do'' read everything he writes, and that his YouTube messages ''invariably'' get to his target audience.

He also describes himself as "managing the varsity team"<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_7/Page_22]</ref> in high school, when actually he was waterboy.

But if, even after all of this, you're ''still'' not convinced that Chris has unwarranted self-importance issues, consider this little tidbit: he posted autographed pictures of himself on Ebay. Looking like this<ref>[[:File:Chris-chan 010714.JPG]]</ref> [[Chris_and_health#Hygiene|no]] [[Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F|less]]. Make of that what you will.

===Persecution complex===

[[Image:Issue4.jpg|thumb|Saint CWC the Martyr.]]

Chris has a lot of problems, and even the ones he "takes responsibility for" are still "out of his hands". His [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|school]] was [[Kick the Autistic|mean to him]], he didn't deserve that [[Song of Christian|F in English]] or the one in [[CADD Chef|CADD]], ''and'' he doesn't deserve the 24/7 [[trolls|trolling]], among other things.

And if that wasn't enough, he thinks every authority figure in the land is conspiring against his [[Love Quest]]:

{{quote|Then in Mid-October, the Quote/Unquote "Dean of Student Services," Mary Lee Walsh, approached me and pulled my sign away from me and told me, "You're NOT ALLOWED TO FIND TRUE LOVE HERE." MY HEART WAS SHATTERED that very moment.|Chris, on his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Enter_the_Wicked_Witch_of_the_Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens|Wikipedia userpage]]}}

It doesn't help that he's engaged in a quagmire of a war against the [[homo]] rumors that those DAMNED TROLLS keep spreading about him, with a second front versus the [[Chris and copyright|copyright]] violating [[Liquid Chris|thieves]].

{{quote|It's out of my control! I don't know where to go! I DUNNO KNOW WHERE TA GO!|Chris, THAT IS MY HOUSE}}

After the release of [[100 2178|May 8 video]] in which Chris blames the Greene County's school board for pretty much every misfortune in life (from being banned from [[The GAMe PLACe]], to [[Autism|being the social outcast we all know and hate]]) thereby cementing the notion that Chris will never take responsibility for his actions. The only time Chris had actually stepped up and admitted responsibility was the accidental formatting of his [[PS3]].

===Naïveté===

Chris's simple-mindedness and gullibility are legendary. Like [[George W. Bush]], he only deals in absolutes: either you're with him or you're [[trolls|against him]]. This has been very obvious in his answers to the [[Mailbag]], where he refuses to listen to any talk — even from professionals — about the similarities between [[Asperger Syndrome]] and [[autism]], denies that there are any shortcomings in his [[Sonichu (comic)|work]], and shrugs off any advice about how to improve his health or appearance, labeling anyone who suggests he has any kind of shortcoming a troll.

Chris equates [[honesty]] with divulging every last detail about his life. Nothing is too candid for Chris - getting haircuts, drinking his own [[navy]], [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shitting his pants]], or even giving away his phone number and home address! The only thing he hasn't done with wild abandon is give away his social security number and when that happens, it probably won't be a surprise to anybody.

His gullibility is astounding. No matter how many times it's happened before, Chris is easily led around by trolls promising [[china]] or threatening [[Sonichu|his]] [[Copyright|identity]]. The earlier trolling schemes (such as [[Blanca]], [[PandaHalo]] and [[Jimmy Hill]]) got Chris to jump through hoops and exposed so much information about Chris and his personality that they had to start a [[CWCki|wiki]] to keep track of it all. Another example of Chris' gullibility is one Miss [[Jackie|Jacklyn Romy]], a 'sweetheart' Chris met earlier in 2011. Despite her obviously being a troll (proven by a mysterious leak of videos that were sent only to Jackie on [[February 2012]]), Chris has re-friended her on Facebook after blocking her the previous April. Only time would tell if we end up seeing Chris [[Cosplay|cosplaying]] or [[Cakefarts|making an ass of himself]] again in a video aimed only at Jackie. It's pretty obvious that Chris has only done this because he believes that [[Naive|he'll score with Jackie sooner or later]].

In [[2009]] and [[2010]], Chris slowly began to "learn" to distrust trolls or to keep more of his [[PSN|information]] secure. However, many of his trolls believe this is akin to putting a shock collar on an animal. Eventually, in order to stop being shocked (not because they actually understand or care) an animal will start doing as it is told.

===Hubris: the pride before the fall===

[[Image:NeitherOfUs.jpg|thumb|It's fair to say that Chris is a narcissist]]

{{quote|I'd say... I'd say I'm all around. You see, the problem is that I have too many skills that I am good at. You might say that I am a jack of all trades and a master of none.|Chris, [[Mumble 3|right about that last part]]}}
Numerous times, Chris has shown that he believes he has powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal [[slow-in-the-minds|autistics]]. In fact, so much so that this attitude has transcended mere hubris, instead it more resembles mental illness: not only is Chris convinced that his [[Chris and writing|writing]], [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|musical]] [[Guitar Hero|talents]], and [[Chris and art|art]] are without peer, he also believes he has supernatural powers along the lines of [[Chris and religion|Wicca or Voodoo]].

And he doesn't just have the power to create: his is also the power to destroy. This line of thinking is exemplified by Chris's acceptance that [[Ryan Cash]] committed suicide just because he withheld ''Sonichu'' updates, and would worsen when he believed that his [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]] actually caused [[Liquid Chris]] and [[Mary Lee Walsh]] to have some sort of horror befall them.

But those are just the most insane moments of cognitive dissonance. What about the time he went into hysterics when he didn't get recognition for his art at high school graduation?

{{quote|I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt crestfallen greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!|Chris, on his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Graduation|Wikipedia page]]}}

Or his reaction to losing the [[Adam Stackhouse|Parappa Contest]]?

{{quote|So that SWORN ON MY AUTISM, JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED TO THE SEVEN PEOPLE OF THOSE FOUR VIDEOS!!!!|Chris, on the [http://web.archive.org/web/20070830114517/http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm Sonichu Site]}}

[[Image:How chris sees himself.jpg|thumb|What Chris sees when he looks in the mirror]]

All of the above is consistent with the behavior of small children, who, isolated from the real world by a lack of comprehension and limited mobility, believe themselves to be godlike beings. This belief is gradually destroyed as the child goes to school and encounters outside authority, leading to their acknowledgment of the fact that they are, in fact, ordinary people. Of course, since Chris is not only autistic but also [[Barbara|extremely sheltered]], he still manages to cling to this belief by focusing on specific aspects of his life and constructing [[CWCville|elaborate fantasy worlds]]. This is also probably why he sees mundane [[chores]] as [[Father Call|horrific trials of strength and will]]. In psychological terms, this can be referred to as ''psychological neoteny'', which is basically the retention of juvenile traits well into physical maturity.

Also consistent with his childlike mindset is his apparent belief that he has supernatural powers. In Freudian terms, this is referred to as ''omnipotence of thought''. Basically, in the same way he does with religion, Chris cherry-picks elements of his life in order to validate his fantasy of control, which is more systematically displayed in the Sonichu comics. Taking this into consideration, it's likely that [[Magi-Chan]] is yet another Mary Sue for Chris, serving as a kind of avatar for his desire for ultimate authority. Why he felt it necessary to make [[Reginald Sneasel|yet]] another [[Sonichu (character)|character]] to fill this role is unclear, considering he's already established [[Chris-chan Sonichu|himself]] as the one true God of [[CWCville]].

Another aspect of Chris's arrogance, and again caused by his childish way of viewing [[Virginia|the world]], is visible in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|a phone call]] with Alec Benson Leary, creator of [[Asperchu]]. In the call it is obvious Chris does not follow a mature procedure for developing a stance on issues. Where normally an individual will learn information about the issue and from there decide how they feel about that issue, Chris does it the other way around and decides how he feels about something, then refuses to believe, understand, or even humor any evidence to the contrary. While most people have very strong beliefs in some issues, so much so that they automatically have a prejudice against people believing differently (e.g. [[Barack Obama|politics]], [[religion]], etc.), Chris has this perspective on everything. He takes a position on matters, then finds ways to back it up and ignores all evidence for the opposing viewpoint. This is called a ''[[Wikipedia:confirmation bias|confirmation bias]]''. For example, Chris has decided [[homos]] are bad, so he selectively finds [[Leviticus|information]] that backs up his stance on the matter and ignores anything anyone will tell him about why his homophobia is bad and makes him a bad person. He will then go as far as to pretend he can [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|cure homosexuality]] with his own blood. Unless disliking homosexuals means he [[I'm Sorry, Dude|may not get laid]].

This is most apparent when he takes two contrary positions about a similar topic. The obvious example of this is Chris's understanding of the way [[parody]] functions. Chris will defend his right to make Sonichu to the hilt by claiming it is a parody, but he then states that Asperchu is a bad thing because it is "parody of a parody". As you can see, Chris has decided that he has every right to make Sonichu so he backs this up with statements about his right to parody existing trademarked characters, but conversely he has decided Asperchu is bad, so he supports this position by stating it is a parody of his legitimate work.

A literal example of the 'pride before the fall' would be Chris' series of [[Facebook]] posts between April and June of 2012. In [[April 2012]], Chris believed that he had utterly fooled the trolls when he made a [[Facebook#to_.40cogsdev_from_me.2C_.40CWCSonichu|series]] [[Facebook#Maniacal_Laughter_from_Who_now.3F_Oh.2C_wait.2C_It_Is_ME.21_.3E8D|of]] [[Facebook#Hey.2C_Trollies|posts]] mocking them. He even went so far as to post screenshots of the CWCki forum members talking about it. Note that in several of the screenshots, Chris believed that he had uncovered a scheme to start a poster campaign about him in [[Charlottesville]]. According to his [[Facebook#To_The_Trolls|Facebook post dated 4th June, 2012,]] he had called the [[Jerkops|cops]], and basically admitted that he completely fell for it. He then recorded an [[Voicemail_greeting#4_June_2012|angry voicemail greeting]] before quickly deleting it. Compared to [[Voicemail_greeting#30_April_2012|an earlier voicemail he made]], one can clearly see how humbled he was.

===Materialism===

{{quote|I want Julie! Yeah, love is my first priority, but then- but then I want my stuff back!|Chris, caring more about his precious PSN Account and Sonichu website than his [[troll|sweetheart]].}}

It is clear that Chris is a materialist (a common symptom of Narcissistic Personality Disorder), buying and hoarding large amounts of crap that make him feel good about himself. He may even believe that his unhealthy amount of children's toys might attract a [[sweetheart]], when any human being would clearly see that this man is [[Naïve|delusional]]. He also doesn't seem to have a problem with getting [[money]] for sitting on his ass, claiming he can get more from his [[tugboat]] than he could at an actual job. He has absolutely no concept of money, and believes he is entitled to everything he can buy. This stems from childhood, when Snorlax would take Chris to the toy store and encourage him to talk by giving him toys if he could read their names out loud.<ref>See [[1980s#1989|1989 in Christory]]</ref> Ever since, he's believed that just by being autistic, he deserves everything he can get his grubby hands on.

This mixture of compulsive hoarding, compulsive shopping, and autism is bad news all the way. He compulsively hoards all of his toys and video games because he wants to give them to [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(daughter)|his daughter]] in the future. He also seems to enjoy collecting things, which may explain why Pokémon appeals to him. Chris compulsively buys everything he can on the PS3, and is more concerned with trophies than actual gameplay. Most of the games he's downloaded have never been played. But the important thing is that he ''has'' it. Hoarding items in cases other than OCD is a sign of intellectual disability in older children. He may have inherited this behavior from his parents.

===Tender misanthropy===

A "tender misanthrope" is, by definition, "someone who despises humanity in general, but is ever ready to make an exception for the ''real'' people". In other words, an egotist who pretends to be benevolent. While it's obvious that Chris is an egotist, he truly believes that he's benevolent. He is the perfect example of a tender misanthrope, screaming death threats at what he knows of humanity (seeing as the only social contact he gets is from the [[Internet]]) while also believing that he is a kind, loving person who can [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|give advice]] and [[Pedofork|act as a role model for children]].

Another part of the definition states that "a tender misanthrope feels certain of being able to love real people if only they could be found - or, failing that, [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|to transform existing false people into idealized ''real'' people]] through social and political programs of the tender misanthrope's own making". The way that Chris treats [[homos]], seeing as he hates them all ([[Mailbag_53#Well,_that_makes_everything_better!|no matter what he says]]) and wants to turn them straight by placing them into co-ed prisons, reprogramming them into straights via concentration camps, or by creating a vaccine that "cures" homosexuality, certainly fits this description. The fact that he also generalizes trolls as homos also supports this. If that does not convince you that Chris feels he can make people into what he can emotionally attach himself to, there are also other obvious examples in his unique delivery of his intentions.

===Disregard of rules of conduct online===

{{quote|DO NOT DELETE, NOR CENSOR, MY BOMBASTIC PROTEST!!!!!!|Chris, in [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica#4 September|Encyclopedia Dramatica]]}}

Chris has little regard for the rules of online communities; when he joins up on websites, he tends to do things his way. He assumes that his own niche in these websites is under his absolute control: for example, he assumed that [[Wikipedia]] would allow him to post anything on his personal user page, or that Encyclopedia Dramatica would remove material critical to him if he just asked not-so-nicely. Sites like [[deviantART]] and [[YouTube]] allow community participation; Chris simply disallowed comments, or later on, just ignored every comment he received. Chris also assumes that when other people host websites for him (in case of [[CWCipedia]]), he's given the final say on all matters. His record for getting permabanned is currently at two weeks on [[Flipnote Hatena]] when he foolishly tried to re-upload Flipnotes that had been removed for breaking the rules (without bothering to find out why they had been removed in the first place).

===Paranoia===

One of the worst things that comes out of Chris's ego is his bloated sense of paranoia. As mentioned above, Chris has taken to withholding certain information from trolls like an animal being shocked by a shock collar. However, this line of thinking has pushed Chris into believing that the entire world is out to get him. In early days, it was actually simple - [[Jerkops]] and [[Mary Lee Walsh]] were conspiring to stop him from succeeding in his [[Love Quest]]. However, after the incident with [[The Wallflower]] and the realization that there's entire webpages devoted to him, it's caused him to see things in a bigger, yet disturbing picture.

As such, Chris has decided to become a recluse, refusing to make friends with anyone unless he knew him in the real world. However, this is a double-edged sword as Chris refuses to interact with anyone in the real world as well. In the real world, if someone spotted Chris and knew him by name, even if they had heard of him from whatever remaining place is left for him to go to, he panics and runs, fearing that the person is actually a troll seeking to spread more information about him across the Internet. As well, if someone wanted to contact Chris through other means, even if that person had no idea who Chris was or what Sonichu was or anything that the trolls had done, Chris will shut them out because he doesn't know who they are and thus, has relegated them to the title of "troll".

A perfect example of this was revealed in a series of [[Facebook]] screenshots. While eating at a [[McDonald's]] restaurant, an employee of Burger King spotted him, acknowledged him, then went to mess with his cell phone. Chris went into panic mode, assumed that the worker was actually a troll, then thought the man was "communicating with his own kind" by hopping on a forum. He then proceeded to photograph the man, and talk about him behind his back on Facebook, [[Chris and hypocrisy|ironically doing what he feared the 'troll' would do to him.]]

===Surrendering Information===

If there is one thing that Chris's ego would simply not allow, it's suppressing himself from giving away too much information about himself. If he feels that bragging about something would give him a one-up against the trolls or make himself look good, he'll freely announce it for everyone to hear. The most glaring example of this is [[CWCki|this entire wiki]], which was created using a lot of information provided by Chris himself. Back in the day, Chris viewed himself as an extremely popular internet celebrity with a [[Trolls|'true and loyal fanbase']], and, as such, would divulge a lot of information about himself so people would know him better (inclusive of [[Dox|personal information]] that nobody in their right mind would give away). However, there are times when he would do the opposite and [[Honest Content|surrender information that would make him look horrendously bad]], sometimes without provocation. [[DIRTY_CRAPPED_BRIEFS|The ongoing Soiled Underpants Saga]] is the shining example of this.

Whilst this practice has diminished in recent times with Chris making himself scarce out of fear that trolls would have more [[Tomgirl Pictures|ammo]] to use against him, his habit of needlessly surrendering information still manages to surface. For example, when he claimed to lose his virginity, he couldn't help but announce it on his [[Facebook]] page, all the while swearing up and down that he would never divulge any details about it to the trolls. Mere weeks later, more details emerged on Facebook, leading to speculation that he actually bought a hooker (since we all know the [[Megan|inevitable]] [[Kacey|end]] [[Jackie|result]] of his [[Love Quest|Sweetheart Search]]), which he ended up confirming on 1 May, (along with attending a 'Mythbusters' tour, something which wasn't even brought up but still revealed anyway) all the while claiming to remain button-lipped on the matter. Only time would tell if and when Chris finally reveals everything to silence his nay-sayers. After all, it wouldn't be the [[The Wallflower| first time]] it's happened.

In 2013, Chris's habit of needlessly surrendering information returned with a vengeance. Chris threw a temper tantrum on [[Facebook]], and many would have assumed that it was [[Chris and Anger|business as usual]], ''until'' Chris made the fatal mistake of revealing the reason why he went on the warpath; somebody had uploaded his status updates (complete with the ones that were hidden) onto [http://imgur.com/a/1HYJJ an Imgur account.] Aside from the usual whining about how lonely he was, these screencaps not only revealed what he was up to in the silence between 2011 and 2013, but also uncovered a very ugly side of Chris. One post in particular revealed that he was angry at the fact that [[Mimms]] had a girlfriend, and demanded that somebody should ''kill her'', simply because Mimms was a "[[JERK]]." The fact remains that the one who revealed all of this unsavory information was not the trolls, as Chris would try to have you believe, but ''himself.''

===Fishing For Sympathy===

In many conversations with Chris, there have been quite a few instances where he would outright fish for sympathy, in the hopes that people would take pity on him and, in so doing, make him feel better about himself. One such example is [[Father Call]], where Chris constantly talks about the "trials and tribulations" in his life to an unimpressed [[Matthew Devoria]], from whom he was trying to seek approval to date his daughter ''(note that said "trials and tribulations" amounted to housework and being teased on the internet.)'' In his [[Jackie_E-mails_23|later E-mail exchanges]] with [[Jackie]], Chris is quick to paint himself as a misunderstood victim whenever Jackie rips him a new one over issues such as his habit of [[Lie|lying]], [[Chris and Hypocrisy|being a hypocrite]] and even being [[Women%27s_rights|inconsiderate towards her]]. Even in recent times, he has not cut out this habit, his [[Facebook]] entries blame his trolls for making his life a living hell, one in particular lamenting that nobody cares about him except for his own mother.

The attention he gets from his mother, [[Barbara Chandler]], and his friend, [[Anna McLerran]] is textbook mollycoddling at best. Chris has spent his entire life being catered to by his parents ''(notably well past the point of social acceptance)'', to the point where he depends on them to bail him out of the [[Money#Credit_cards|numerous]] [[The_Game_Place|messes]] he gets himself into. It comes as no surprise, then, that this, combined with his being [[Autism|autistic]], has poisoned Chris' mind into thinking that this is how everybody should treat him, by default. And if people don't see things his way, he'll be more than happy to point out the [[Kick the Autistic|heavy burdens he faces daily]], almost as if he expects them to instantly take back their mean, mean words and feel sorry for him.

==War against the ego==

One of the main forces opposing Chris's ego are the [[white knight]]s. These [[slow-in-the-minds|misguided souls]] have attempted to get Chris to understand that what he's doing is ridiculous and that he needs to grow up. Instead, he brushed them all aside, assuring himself that he was [[Honest Content|TRUE and HONEST]], and could do no wrong. One of the more popular white knights, [[Vivian Gee]], became a troll when she couldn't get through to Chris.

When asked to get [[Chris and psychology|real, psychiatric help]], Chris has said that his church counselor, [[Rocky Shoemaker]], is enough for him, and that she could do so much more than someone with ''an actual degree in that field.'' He seems to believe that because her title includes the word "counselor," she is every bit as qualified as a real doctor (the fact that most pastoral counselors see people for free probably helps as well, since Chris would never spend part of his precious monthly tugboat on something useful when there are [[video games]] to buy).

There were even some instances where it seemed that the trolls had made a breakthrough by [[Heart level|breaking Chris]], only for him to get right back up again and continue with his antics. An example of this would be [[Kacey]], who led Chris on for a while until she dropped the bombshell that she was going to marry [[Liquid Chris]], but not before having her father point out [[Father Call|every single thing that is wrong with Chris.]] A normal person would have been utterly devastated by this turn of events, and some would even use the experience to better themselves. Chris, on the other hand, perked right up when he [[Red_Letter_CWC_Certified_Day|obtained a letter 'validating' Sonichu]], forgetting about Kacey in mere days, just like she had predicted.

==Examples of Chris's ego in the real world and in the comic==

[[Image:SchuComic8P68.jpg|thumb|250px|[[Jiggliami]] sums it up nicely]]

{{Main|Examples of Chris's Ego}}

{{clear}}

==References==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

BlueSpike

2014-08-18T17:47:29Z

MindHit: Repeated word.

{{Articleofthenow}}

{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | <s>Sweethearts</s> Trolls
|-
| colspan="2" | [[File:JULAYYYYYYYY.PNG|300px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |BlueSpike
|-
|'''Real name'''
|David
|-
| '''Alias'''
| LeonSpike Julie Milvana Max Milvana
|-
| '''Date of Birth'''
| c. 1996
|-
| '''Gender'''
| <s>Female</s> Male
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| [[Chris and race|White]]
|-
| '''Occupation(s)'''
| [[Trolls|Troll]]
|-
|}
Most thirteen-year-old boys only dream of getting to watch an [[autistic]] [[Chris|manchild]] shove pieces of [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|CRAYOLA FUCKIN' MODEL MAGIC]] up his ass. '''BlueSpike''' (AKA '''LeonSpike''', "a 13 year old brat" according to Chris) got to live that dream, when he [[troll]]ed Chris through two identities: a [[sweetheart]] '''Julie''' (aka '''JULAAAY''') and her brother '''Max'''.

The trolling caused events such as Chris admitting to Julie that he had tried the [[sex toys|anal beads and the butt dildo]], the infamous [[sex tape]] where he fucks [[Kimmi]], a description of a future scene from [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] alluding to his [[Gay 4 Sonichu|gay fans]], how Chris hates everything that's not Aryan, his father [[Bob Walks In|Bob walking in]] to him [[mass debating]], and other sick shit.

In [[August 2011]], Chris claimed to know BlueSpike's real identity (first name '''David''') and threatened to drop dox on him. However, this has yet to occur.

==Julie==
[[Image:LetterfromJulie(2of2).jpg|thumb|left|100px|What Chris believed Julie looked like.]]

{{quote|I can tell in my heart Julie IS 19.|Chris on Julie.<ref>[[Mumble 10]]</ref>}}
{{quote|JULAAAAAAY!!!! JULAAAAAAY!!!!|Chris professes his undying love while humping a [[Kimmi|doll]].}}

'''Julie Milvana'''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 5]]</ref> (born 13 July 1989<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 4]]</ref>) was a [[Molvanîa]]n Methodist<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> [[Sonichu]] fan who became Chris's sweetheart after [[PandaHalo]]. Her kidnap by her evil brother Max led to Chris's ill-fated [[Ohio trip|rescue mission]] to Cleveland.

Julie first showed up in IRC in December [[2008]], suggesting the infamous [[Tour of Chris's House]] video.<ref>[[IRC (15 December 2008)]]</ref> She later posed a ton of ''Sonichu'' questions submitted by fans.<ref>[[IRC (28 December 2008)]]</ref> She was later invited to [[Sonichu Girls]]. As early as 3 [[January 2009]], she asked Chris what he would do if a [[JERK]] kidnapped his [[heartsweet]] - he said, ''"I would learn his demands if any, or if he hurt her, I'd strike the jerk back."'' Julie also got excited by the prospect of an orgy with Chris and the Sonichu Girls.<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref> The next day, it was revealed that Chris had promised his virginity to both Panda and Julie, and both ladies were furious, with Julie threatening to kill herself.<ref>[[IRC (04 January 2009)]]</ref> Later she calmed down and moved to Ohio to live with relatives. Ever classy, Chris suggested a threesome with PandaHalo.<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs]]</ref>

Chris refused to drive to Ohio, instead insisting that Julie come to him. He also couldn't be bothered to attack Clyde in IRC, even when he threatened Julie.<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 2]]</ref>

When Chris chose [[Sarah May]] over her, Julie was crushed. Chris apologized, and then abruptly [[Autism|went back to talking about vidya]].<ref name="a">[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 4]]</ref>

Clyde Cash made more serious threats against Julie, forcing Chris to upload a famous [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|5 February 2009 video]] admitting that he was gay.<ref name="a" />

Once Chris got it into his head that [[PandaHalo]] had burned to death in a wildfire, he began to focus even more on Julie as a sweetheart.

Chris received a [[:File:LetterfromJulie(1of2).jpg|letter]] written by Julie, the first physical [[:File:LetterfromJulie(2of2).jpg|proof]] of her "existence". In it, it details the love professed by her to Chris.

That Valentine's Day, Chris uploaded [[LittleBigPlanet|an ''LBP'' level]], and Chris and Julie took their relationship to the next level with cyber sex. [[Bob Walks In|Bob walked in]], and the rest is history. Chris's parents didn't believe that Julie was TRUE and HONEST.<ref>[[Bob Walks In Aftermath]]</ref>

In [[For Julie's Eyes Only|an infamous video]] of 20 [[February 2009]], Chris created a sex video for Julie with the help of his inflatable assistant [[Kimmi]], in order to give Julie an idea of what their first time together would be like. Chris's agonized cries of "JULAAAAAAAY!" would prove one of the most striking and memorable of CWC-isms; to this date, many erroneously believe that Kimmi ''is'' Julie. This is not so; Chris may be the most desperate man alive, but he's not quite got to the point where he's convinced himself any of his sex dolls are real.

{{clear}}

==Max==
[[Image:Anon.jpg|thumb|left|100px|The mysterious Max.]]
[[Image:Nnocac.jpg|thumb|Receipts from Chris's epic journey to Cleveland. Note that he asked for no [[pickle]]s on the mayo hamburger, and that the place he at was a [[Sonic]] Drive-In.]]

Max was the evil, mysterious brother of Julie who held her against her will. On 26 February 2009, Chris valiantly traveled to [[Ohio trip|Ohio]] in a bid to rescue her and got his parents all worried. (His ancestors' spirits had wished him "a Safe Trip to Ohio" two days prior at [[Aunt Corrina]]'s funeral.)<ref>[[Jackie Chat 7]]</ref> Unfortunately, because Chris got the "wrong" address, he ended up at a run down house in the ghetto that was inhabited by an elderly [[black]] woman.<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 13]]</ref>

On 3 [[March 2009]], Max gained control of Chris's PlayStation Network account, and during an hour-long audio session he threatened to sell the PSN account and forbade Julie from seeing Chris. Chris was coerced into declaring [[BILLY MAYS]] to be the mayor of CWCville and shoving the pieces of his destroyed [[Sonichu medallion]] up his ass while shouting "Zap to the extreme!" before he was allowed to speak to Julie as seen in the video below, at which point Julie admits that both she and Max have been BlueSpike, a thirteen-year-old boy in league with Clyde Cash. At no point did BlueSpike even mention the sex tape (which had already gotten nearly two million hits). BlueSpike's female voice is an unconvincing falsetto, which makes it all the more hilarious that it worked so well on Chris.

This incident shattered both his [[heart level]] and his anus to 0%.

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|1xo3SAwefBM}}
</center>

{{-}}

For audio and a complete transcription of the conversation, see [[Julie Reveals Herself]]. (The revelation of Julie's true identity comes in the final section of the transcript.)

==Encyclopedia Dramatica Troll War==
[[Image:Advicespikemedallion.png|thumb|right|Kids say the darndest things.]]

On 5 [[March 2009]], an all-out civil war broke out between trolls on the Chris-chan [[ED]] discussion page on whether BlueSpike had gone too far, whether he was a hypocrite, or if he was merely a tool initiated by Clyde Cash to ruse Chris into the further milking of [[lulz]]. Suffice to say, a combination of outrage and troll remorse turned the whole event into a clusterfuck.

{{quote|If BlueSpike really is 13 years old, then we know who the real child molesters are. "hey, they made fun of YOU for doing sonic recolours?, look at this guy!". "hey! be one of the cool kids, help this autistic guy jack off, pretend to be a girl so we can video tape and record it..." . Thats the REAL reason you were shiting it and called for a 30 minute silence just after, Clyde/Mayes. At least you had the balls to say that it was you responsible in channel once. You know its not going to be pizza's at 1am, and you know its not a fucking cat. If Bluespike really is 13, then you groomed a child to perform sex acts on a mentally retarded man for your pleasure. You're fucked, son. You both broke a lolcow, but theres better sport now, ruining your lives. And dont act like you dont care, I saw you shiting yourself all that night and the next, sending waves of members out to kill threads about it or put in false names, just like Your sock earlier in the page. Ready to have a seat of there?|Wit, ED user}}

Most of the trolling did involve BlueSpike having phone sex with Chris for hours each night, disgustingly listening to the guy [[mass debate|fap]]. <ref = http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Gq35fqRk5E&feature=channel_page>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Gq35fqRk5E</ref> <ref = http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpj5Hg80f1E>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpj5Hg80f1E</ref>  As BlueSpike was in complete control of Chris, he could have done more sinister things, but night after night he engaged in nothing but noisy phone sex and listened to Chris very loudly jack off. Draw your own conclusions about BlueSpike's sexuality. One fap session did produce the epically hilarious [[Bob Walks In|event]] when [[Bob Chandler]] became the Internet Lumberjack.

Today, most trolls tend to frown on BlueSpike and his methods, though some yearn to return to the sadist days of BlueSpike in hopes of an age of trolling where [[A-Logging|physical pain is inflicted upon Chris]].

While one might think that this level of physical and mental abuse would leave lasting scars, BlueSpike's trolling had virtually no evident long-term impact on Chris. Just a few weeks after Julie revealed her true identity, Chris had no trouble believing that he had found another [[Ivy|sweetheart]] online, and just a few weeks after that he had no trouble believing that he was having instant-messenger sex with a [[Vanessa Hudgens|world-famous celebrity]]. The main effect it did have was that although Chris remade a new Sonichu medallion, he stopped wearing it until 1 [[July 2009]].

Chris came to believe that BlueSpike was killed at the hands of [[Clyde Cash]], from an offhand comment Cash made in [[Mumble 12]]. On [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|his version of the ED page]], Chris stated that "That little S.O.B. later died at the hands of the "[[Transformers|Starscream]]" Troll, Clyde Cash." Of course, this statement was later [[Car Pranks|revealed to be a complete and utter bluff]]. Chris himself no longer believes BlueSpike is dead, as is evident from the [[BlueSpike#Called out|video Chris directed at him on August 2011]].

==Called out==
On 23 [[August 2011]], [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David|Chris claimed]] to know BlueSpike's real identity (first name '''David''') and threatened to drop dox on him unless he made an apology video BY 15 [[September 2011]] in which he left the Internet forever and told people to stop making [[prank calls]] calling Chris "[[Ian Brandon Anderson]]" and yelling [[For Julie's Eyes Only|"JULAAAAAAAAYYY!"]]. So far, BlueSpike has not yet responded.

While Chris has not revealed BlueSpike's true identity, there are reasons to suspect it is the lolcow known as [https://encyclopediadramatica.es/Nesshelper Nesshelper]. The picture Chris presented as BlueSpike's real photo appears to be a closeup of [https://encyclopediadramatica.es/File:Davidharlow.jpg this picture]. Chris's comment about BlueSpike's love for big rooms might be a reference to a [http://vimeo.com/21478293 video rant] in which Nesshelper complains about the size of a hotel room in which he was staying.

==See also==
{{Fan art}}
*[[BlueSpike PSN Chats]]
*[[Bob Walks In]]
*[[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
*[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]
*[[For Julie's Eyes Only]]
*[[Julie Reveals Herself]]

== Sources ==
<references/>

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=B3D68D552646B0AD BlueSpike's infamous conversation with Chris]

{{Trolls}}
{{Love quest}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]
[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Julie Saga]]

Autism

2014-08-15T18:25:34Z

MindHit: New to the wiki and reading a bunch of pages, this is just a tiny typo, I'll edit others if I find them.

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Template:DeadLinks}}
[[File:Auti.PNG|thumb|Odd that he respects [[Chris and copyright|trademarks]] when he feels like it...]]
{{quote|It sometimes takes me a long while before I can fully comprehend and make an appropriate reaction. In another word, '''I am Sometimes Retarded'''.|Chris, on himself.<ref>6th paragraph down: http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality</ref>}}
{{quote|I'm POSSIBLY [[slow-in-the-minds|retarded]]...|Chris on his autism, [[Mumble]] chat 23 February 2009}}
{{quote|I'M RETARDED|Chris, [[CWC - Exposing Jeff]]}}

[[Image:086-BionicFlag.jpg|thumb|[[Bionic the Hedgehog]] "conquering" autism (and "ATScI3") by confusing windmills with watermills.]]
[[Image:461-AutismFight.jpg|thumb|Chris at war with autism (or "ATSIMU") in [[China]]. Too bad you can't fight cannons with [[fangs]].]]
[[Image:Autismcard.jpg|thumb|He plays this card a lot.]]
::''For the song, see [[A-U-T-I-S-M]].''
'''Autism''' is a spectrum of neurological disorders involving the impairment of social interaction and communication. The cause of autism is unknown, but has been shown to have multiple genetic factors. The symptoms usually manifest before the age of 3 and are generally irreversible; there is no known cure, although the condition can be treated. Autistic individuals are generally not retarded — they mostly have average intelligence — although obviously severe social impairment can coincide with stunted learning and development. [[Asperger syndrome]] is generally considered part of the autistic spectrum; individuals with Asperger syndrome generally have above-average intelligence, although they still suffer from the social and communicative impairments. Prognosis depends on the severity of the autism and the effectiveness of its treatment; autistic people may learn to live relatively normal, productive lives or they may have become so unable to function in society that they must be institutionalized.

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] has built much of his identity around being autistic. His terror of being associated with severely autistic/retarded people causes him to be overly eager to prove his basic competence and cite his success in primary and secondary education. At the same time, his pride from accomplishing these things in spite of his disability has conditioned him to demand outrageous praise for his slightest efforts and infinite patience for his gravest errors. Moreover, Chris's belief that the entire Greene County Board of Education continues to irrationally persecute him for his autism has left him suspicious of opposing points of view and resolute that anti-autistic prejudice is the reason for any of his setbacks.<ref>[[Greene_County_Conspiracy]]</ref> In short, it is impossible to understand Chris's [[Chris and anger|defensiveness]], [[stress|hypersensitivity]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissism]], [[Chris and remorse|irresponsibility]], [[Man in the Pickle Suit|paranoia]], [[100 2178|victimhood]], and [[Story of My Current Days|self-pity]] without understanding his relationship with autism.

Chris not only seems to think that having autism imbues him with a [[Chris and his Ego|special significance]], but also feels that his autism is different from that of every other person in the world who has autism.<ref>[[Asperger_Syndrome]]</ref> Chris feels he is naturally better than everyone else and often talks down to people who display knowledge or experience of subjects he is unfamiliar with. During his conversation with [[Father_Call|Kacey's father]], Chris downplayed Kacey's knowledge of biology and healthcare despite being proven wrong minutes before in a debate over the genetics of autism.<ref>[[Father_call#Kacey's_boobs_and_Internet_fame]]</ref> At the same time, Chris believes he is not responsible for the majority of his mistakes. By being autistic, Chris rationalizes that it is wholly the fault of autism if he [[Twin Falling Towers|makes]] [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|poor]] [[Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_Out_of_College|decisions]].<ref>[[Jackie_E-mails_20]]</ref>

==High-functioning vs. low-functioning==

{{quote|He may be high functioning (which I actually doubt -- who would want to admit to thousands of strangers that they are actually severely challenged??), but that does not mean he can function like a non-mentally challenged person.|[[http://www.cracked.com/funny-3956-chris-chan/| real2, Cracked.com]]}}

Informally, autism may be subdivided into separate classifications based on the intelligence and degree of function the autistic individual possesses; for a general idea, this crude scale could have levels of high-functioning, medium-functioning, and low-functioning. Chris has latched onto this concept and will frequently qualify his condition, saying he has '''high-functioning autism''', or '''HFA'''. Generally, HFA is loosely defined as; the ability to live in the mainstream world as opposed to being institutionalized, having near-normal comprehension, demonstrating fluent speech, and possessing near average intellect. This presents Christian with an easy scapegoat and alibi: he cannot be blamed for his own failures because he has autism, but he does not accept treatment or advice for his "medium" or "low" level autistic traits because he's ''high-functioning'' and therefore, nearly normal.

[[Trolls]] have often noted that the "high-functioning" qualifier is '''not''' a clinical diagnosis and is '''not''' recognized by the [[Wikipedia:DSM-IV|DSM-IV-TR]] or the [[Wikipedia:ICD-10|ICD-10]]. This usually goes hand-in-hand with questioning the severity and/or diagnosis of Chris's impairment, if not outright calling him a [[lie|liar]]. However, the Chandlers didn't make the "HFA" label up, and compared to kids who can barely speak and just walk in circles all day, Chris is relatively close to neurotypical. Semantics aside, though, it's clear that Chris is far from normally-functioning. Only an [[Autism_papers|updated]] [[28_October_2011#Arraignment,_plea_bargain,_and_sentencing|psychological profile]] would really provide insight into the complex and controversial mixture of autism and mental illness that is present within Christian.

Disgustingly, but perhaps not surprisingly, Chris detests [[Slow-in-the-minds|low-functioning autistics]] in the [[Chris and hypocrisy|exact manner]] that he fears normal people will detest him. In [[Mailbag 25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]], he compares those with low-functioning autism with those who suffer from severe retardation or severe brain damage, thinking that they would have their arms linked together, have deformations, be confined to wheelchairs or crutches and drool and grunt and growl. He has also described them with extremely cruel and derisive terms, calling them "WINDOWS TO HELL" and compared them to "zombies".<ref>[[Mailbag_5#In which Chris speaks ill of the handicapped|Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_11#Elevators are important for the handicapped, so they don't want any phobias|Mailbag 11]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]]</ref> The irony of his resentment toward 'Low Functioning' Autistic people is that he has a severely autistic cousin, as revealed in the [[autism papers]]; this probably means that either Chris is not aware of his own relatives (very probable), or he has disowned members of his own family on the basis of them having the same medical condition that he has (albeit more severely affected by it), being the autism-Nazi he is.<ref>[[Asperger syndrome]]</ref>

He explains that he refuses to date a girl with any form of autism because he fears that seeing them will make him think about what he might be like if he had anything other than high-functioning autism.<ref>[[Chris_chan_(CWCipedia)#Chris_Chan_on_sticking_things_up_b.2A.2A.2Ahole.|Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref> Chris believes he can do much more than any low-functioning autistic could, even as he's living with [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] well into his thirties, has never had a real girlfriend or held a steady job, and [[Dirty, crapped briefs|soils himself]] on a semi-regular basis.<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

Still, presuming Chris is autistic, he is high-functioning since he can talk, drive, write, and draw. However, this also means that he has the same medical condition as [[Microsoft|Bill Gates]] and the creator of [[Pokémon]] amongst many others, yet he has failed to do anything significant with his adult life, hence proving that his vulgarity and failure are utterly his fault.

{{clear}}

==Onset and diagnosis of Chris's autism==

{{quote|No one GIVES A SHIT that you are autistic, they NEVER DID.|[[Jackie E-mails 23|Jackie]]}}
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|Now GodBearJesus can't get him to shut up.]]

Chris's version of how he developed autism is best explained in the [[Song of Christian]] video. There he explains how a [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]] locked him in a room filled with toys at around age 1 1/2. After crying for hours, he emerged from the room unable to talk (which implies that Chris could talk before this incident, and that would be in direct contradiction to Chris's own parents stating that he never spoke until around the age of seven); as Chris himself puts it, "[[Chris and Religion|God]] put the mute button on me."<ref>[[Song_of_Christian#The_actual_poem]]</ref> Most specialists claim that these symptoms of autism begin to show around that age anyway,<ref>[[wikipedia:Autism#Characteristics|Wikipedia: Autism Characteristics]]</ref> so even if the events of the story happened, the babysitter didn't cause the autism. It is far more likely that Chris's parents simply looked for anyone to blame (other than the elderly [[Bob]] and [[Barb]]) for Chris's sudden loss of language development. Notably, Chris has diverged from this story before, having claimed at least once that he was intentionally "injected" with autism by doctors when he was a child, as if that were even possible. Nevertheless, it speaks volumes on the [[List of Chris's lies|veracity]] of the former account if he can't even keep his story straight, not to mention that Chris probably [[Naive|has little idea on the causes of autism]] anyway.

As for how Chris ''actually'' became autistic, studies have shown that there is a [http://www.webmd.com/brain/autism/news/20100208/autism-risk-rises-with-mothers-age positive correlation between the age of the mother and the risk of autism]. Given that [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] was 40 years old when she gave birth to Chris, this is a likely explanation.

It is currently unclear how Chris came to be considered as "autistic," although Chris has claimed that his parents possess official documentation about this in a safe. When pressed to release this information, he provided a [[autism papers|2004 psychiatric evaluation]] that states Chris was diagnosed with autism when he was "around age five or six." However, there's no way to be sure if the evaluator simply wrote down Chris's responses to his questions or independently verified them. (For example, Chris might not remember his exact age when he was diagnosed, but you'd think his medical records could be more precise than "five or six.") By the time of the Chandlers' legal battle with Greene County, Chris's autism seemed to have become a universally accepted fact, but the details of how, when, and where Chris was diagnosed remain a mystery.

When recounting his childhood, Chris usually skips straight from the "evil babysitter" incident to age seven, so we know very little about what (if any) treatment he received during this crucial period of development. In a [[CWCipedia]] [[mailbag]], Chris claims that when he was young, his parents were told he would never be able to read, write or function on a normal level. He and his doctors have now upgraded his condition to "high-functioning," but apparently his incredibly abysmal upbringing has actually allowed it to progress to mid-functioning at best. However, his characteristics and development throughout his life may put him in the "Childhood Disintegrative Disorder" category, as he has become worse and worse over the years.

In his "Song of Christian" video, he explains that his mother took him to the toy department and coaxed him to read aloud the names of Go-Bots, and later [[Transformers]]. Chris says he began speaking again when he was seven— that is, in [[1989]], when the Transformers line was on its last legs and the Go-Bots line had long since vanished. This would seem to indicate that this form of "therapy" had to have gone on for several years before producing any results.

{{clear}}

==Persecution==

Chris attended [[Greene County Primary School]], apparently without incident, from age 5 until age 9. Problems arose for him in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], where he alleges that the faculty wanted to remove him from mainstream classrooms and send him to what he calls an institution. He also claims that the teachers at the school held him down and recorded his screams. Chris frequently cites this as evidence that the school was senselessly cruel towards him, for no reason apparent to him except an innate fear and distrust of autistic people. More probable, given Chris's ongoing behavioral issues, is that he forced the faculty to restrain him by refusing to restrain himself. There's no way to know if Greene Elementary treated Chris unfairly, but the incident does suspiciously resemble Chris's [[arrest]] in July 2005. The Chandlers sued to prevent the school board from removing Chris from mainstream education before ultimately relocating to Chesterfield County to continue Chris's mainstreaming there.

There's no way to know how much of Chris's attitude about the Greene County crisis is based on his personal recollections or what he was later told by his parents, who themselves seem unusually paranoid about the county's vendetta against their family. However, the result of the incident is clear: Chris emerged from adolescence firmly believing that many people not only misunderstand autistic people but hate and fear them. He seems to believe this prejudice is based not on a person's actions (e.g., throwing fits and irrationally screaming) but on a person's mere identification as autistic, regardless of function. Given Chris's fear of low-functioning autistics, he may in fact think this prejudice is perfectly justified, but wrongfully targeted at a high-functioning individual. Of course, in Chris's mind, he may as well be the only high-functioning autistic in the universe, so he is the one and only innocent victim in "everyone's favorite game, [[Kick the Autistic]]."

Chris's [[Chris and sex#Rape|tactful and sensitive]] comments on a news story about a woman with [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger Syndrome]] being raped revealed that he believes the media, like the rest of the world, has a bias against autism similar to [[wikipedia:Missing white woman syndrome|"Missing White Woman Syndrome"]], and that the story wouldn't have been reported if the victim was a woman with "proper" autism.

==Chris's symptoms==

Many [[troll]]s dispute the exact diagnosis of Chris's mental condition, on the basis that his observed behavior is inconsistent with various autistic people. CWC-related forums (and other forums, for that matter) have seen numerous testimonials about people who are undeniably autistic but nowhere near as fucked-up as Chris has turned out to be, and in general these forums do not consider Chris to be an example of what all autistic people are like. Quite often, autistics are indeed able to learn social skills to some small degree in the context of intellectual learning. Some can even come off as being completely neurotypical because they have come to realize that, while they believe "normal" behavior has a tenuous definition, they must adapt to others' expectations of what's acceptable if they wish to succeed in life. Chris, however, demonstrates a willful ignorance of normalcy, with a sense of entitlement coupled with an expectation that others should not only understand his ridiculous idiosyncrasies in the first place, but also accept them or even force [[Dating education|them]] upon others.

A layperson may come to the conclusion that Chris is not autistic, and he's just a regular, albeit quite idiotic guy with a few "eccentricities", or jump to the other extreme and conclude that Chris has full-blown mental retardation. However, Chris's characteristics are most likely a combination of [[Barbara Chandler|bad parenting]] and genuine autism. The following are aspects of Chris's character that clearly match autistic tendencies:

[[Image:0695-AnnaBD9.JPG|thumb|right|Awkward body language, as Chris displays here, is a common trait of autism.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|Stacking objects is a common symptom of autism, and is often one of its first signs in a young child.]]

*Chris displays virtually no coherent, working theory of mind. This is the essence of autism: autistics have difficulty gauging others' internal, subjective thoughts, feelings, ideas, intents and so on; understanding that these might be different than their own; and predicting their behavior based on these differences. Indeed, the prefix "aut-" is a form of "auto-", meaning "self," as in "automobile," meaning "self-moving". In [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|an email between Clyde Cash and him]], he sent Clyde a link to [[The MovingFoward videos|a video he made of himself destroying his PS3]]. He destroyed his PS3 under the egregiously mistaken impression that he'd be given $9,001 for it, which is in itself an indicator of his fundamental inability to gauge others' actual intents and future behavior. He filmed himself doing it specifically to prove to Clyde, who wasn't present for the destruction, that it happened according to the video's objective portrayal. However, he added that if Clyde showed the video to anyone Chris didn't mean to see it without paying him the money, "it can be considered [Clyde's] Word Alone, possible Movie Editing and Actors, and NOT Fact" as though the video would have any less evidential weight on others if he denied to them what he rightfully claimed to Clyde that it showed with enough certitude that he would give him thousands of dollars because of its being shown.

*Chris places disproportional importance on literal statements, another trait of autism. This is related to the above. Chris acted as though he could convince others of a fact contrary to videographic evidence simply by stating it. Another example is virtually the entire [[Liquid Chris#Liquid Saga|Liquid saga]], where Chris honestly, fervently, pathetically tried to demonstrate what was already blatantly obvious to everyone: that his name is not [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] and that Liquid was not him. He seemed to believe strongly enough [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|to become visibly frustrated]] that others might believe Liquid's statements in the face of the obvious that he had to continually counteract those statements with his own as though just the statements were the most important or most effective means of proving what everyone already knew.

*Chris is extremely gullible. While autistic people can have problems with social cues such as sarcasm, thus being gullible at times, Chris is much more gullible than other autistics, let alone ones that are high-functioning. This is more due to his [[Naïve|inexperience]]. One need only see his extensive [[list of sweethearts]] to see just how easily fooled he is. In addition, not only has he been fooled by trolls pretending to be girls, he has fallen for trolls pretending to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] and approaching him about making a Sonichu game. A telling statement comes from the aforementioned email to Clyde: "even if you upload the video yourself, it '''can be''' considered YOUR Word Alone[.]" (''emphasis added'') Chris might operate on the assumption that if a thing ''can be'' true, it's always reasonable to behave as though it ''is'' true no matter how slight the chance and no matter how much more likely it is to be false.

*Chris lacks a conversational filter. He calls this [[Honest Content|honesty]]; normal people call it social retardation. Without provocation he will tell you about his [[heterochromia|pinkeye]] and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]], and how he is a [[virgin with rage]]. Only when his [[Barbara|mother]] told him to knock it off did he actually give up telling everyone he's a virgin<ref>[[Chris-Chan_(CWCipedia)#Chris_in_Person_.28From_THEIR_Point_of_View.29]]</ref>.

*Chris can't show emotions well with facial expressions and body language. See [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters|his statement to the women of the world]] if you like having Chris haunt your dreams. His inability to display emotions on his face has been called a "[[The Creepy Stare|dead fish expression]]." When he does attempt to have an expression, it looks very cartoonish. He typically speaks in a monotone, and his attempts to sound expressive (see [[CWC's Message for Ivy]]) come off as creepy and unnatural.

*Chris has very poor facial and vocal recognition skills. [[Julie]] was a 13 year old boy using an obvious falsetto and Chris fell for it. In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|one chat]], the boy made no attempt to disguise his voice and Chris was none the wiser, disclosing personal sexual details. Two images of different people were used to represent [[Blanca Weiss]], and Chris didn't notice. In an [[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|AIM Chat]] with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], she sent him a link to pictures of Megan Fox, and Chris complimented her on them. It should be noted that the two have entirely different skin colors.

*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Chris lacks empathy]] and concern for others. See his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|plea]] to Clyde. His suggestion after the loss of [[Ryan Cash]] was "find yourself a girlfriend." He asks for ED to [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|please understand]] him, because he is an "innocent victim of misunderstanding"—he wants empathy from others, but he can't return the favor. Chris primarily sees other people in terms of what they can provide for him; when accused of overstepping his bounds or other wrongdoing, he has no concept of [[Chris and remorse|remorse or apology]] except as something he must do to continue receiving favors. When forced to apologize, he makes insincere apologies followed immediately by further demands.

*Chris has trouble developing relationships. Many neurotypical people have the same problem, but Chris is particularly inept at socializing. He has no filter on what he says and cannot empathize with others, key prerequisites for successfully interacting with people. He also pretty much just talks about himself.

*Chris thinks in absolutes and in terms of clearly defined steps in order to do something. He thinks there must be sex on or by the [[third date]]. He describes his sadness in terms of his [[heart level]] and briefly mentioned a [[Scale of Respect]]. He feels that if he just knows the correct steps to getting a [[sweetheart]], he will be able to find one easily. His [[dating education|crash-course in dating]] and [[Dating|suggestions to Blanca]] assume that a relationship should follow a rigidly predetermined progression instead of a natural flow.
**In the [[Jackie E-mails 23|final exchange of e-mails with Jackie,]] Chris responded to Jackie's frank descriptions of his habits and lifestyle by telling her she had exceeded the "Hurtful Truth Level"; While he knows he should be appreciative of hearing the truth about himself, this was the only way he could wrap his brain around the abstract idea enough to be able to tell her he thought she'd gone too far.

*Chris tends to use solipsistic neologisms; that is, he creates new words that only he himself understands and expects other people to comprehend them. Many articles on this very wiki have been written to explain the resulting [[CWC-isms]].

*Chris exhibits compulsive and repetitive behavior. He wears the same [[shirt]] for days at a time, and uses the same terms and [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|exact]] [[boyfriend-free girl|phrases]] [[sweetheart from the ground-up|frequently]]. He feels the need to refer to people by their full names, plainly visible when he talks about himself, [[Clyde Cash]], or [[Adam Stackhouse]]. Other compulsive and repetitive behavior common with autism is strict following of rules, and near OCD like organization. Chris however, lives in a [[14 Branchland Court|filthy, unorganized house,]] makes comics with dialog bubbles in inappropriate places; and a very inconsistent plot, and disobeys the [[Chris and the law|law]] when it inconveniences him.

*Chris has an extremely narrow range of interests. He seems to only give a damn about video games, prowling for his next [[sweetheart]], his initials, and [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], so much to the point where he practically places [[Sonichu (character)|him]] somewhere in everything he creates. He often wishes to [[dating|combine]] two [[LBP#First Date Level|interests]].

*Although he does not demonstrate any [[Honor roll|competency]] with them, Chris has a fixation on numbers and statistics that would generally be irrelevant to others. He describes measures in concrete terms (e.g. "5 mies[sic] from the city"<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_0/Page_2</ref> instead of "outside the city"), and has a particular obsession with times and dates, timestamping nearly every scene in the comic and giving his characters birthdays that have no relevance to the plot (unless it becomes convenient to "[[pedofork|age up]]" the characters). Needless to say, Chris's tendency to blurt out exact dates and times (assuming he's not talking out of his ass) has made the job of [[CWChronology|CWCki chronologists]] much easier. On the other hand, his haphazard treatment of dates and times in the comic has led to countless [[continuity#Chronology|continuity errors]].

*Chris's given reasons for his love of [[My Little Pony]] are also indicative of autism. Autistics are drawn to physical sensations which give them a feeling of being 'grounded', and this is probably why Chris finds stroking the hair of these toys so "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|therapeutic]]".

*Chris exhibits symptoms of [[Wikipedia:Sensory defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]]; this is a common characteristic of autistic people. Chris often wears his accessories and medallions over top his clothing to avoid skin contact with metals and plastics. This is evident in the way in which Chris wears his watch over the cuff of his sleeve and wraps his medallion through the collar of his shirt.<ref>[[:File:0793-CWCIs24-2.jpg]]</ref> Most obvious however is his [[Fashion#Wrist_warmer|wrist warmer]] which he places on the chain of his medallion. Chris has stated that "[...] it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there."<ref>Email from Chris posted in old PVCC thread 162</ref>

*Chris lacks social awareness. One notable instance, as revealed in the [[autism papers]], was when two [[Niggos|African American]] ladies were speaking to Chris about his love quest, when Chris politely told them that they could not be his girlfriend because they were not white. Based on the report of the examiner, Chris believed he was merely informing the ladies as to his prerequisites for a potential sweetheart while oblivious to the fact he was being racially insensitive.<ref>[[Autism_papers#IDENTIFYING_STATEMENT:]]</ref>

*Unnatural relationships with inanimate objects are also a sign of autism; Chris has an evident obsessions with his [[medallion]], his [[PS3]], and any number of other items that clutter up his [[Chris's room|room]]. Since autistic people have difficulty maintaining relationships with people they often end up becoming emotionally dependent on objects, though this symptom is seen much more in children with autism.

*Chris also appears to have echolalia, a common symptom of autism. This means that he constantly repeats phrases from his favorite television shows, movies and video games, regardless of whether they fit the current situation. In some instances, he calls this [[Random-access humor|"humor"]].

*One of the biggest symptoms of autism Chris displays is his fear and resistance to change, well beyond the point that it could be even related to his autism. Chris is reluctant to get or even look for a job as he has only worked [[Chris's resume|four months in his entire life,]] has never come close to moving out, has a very hard time selling or giving up his toys or shirts, wouldn't stick to a diet and exercise program, [[attraction Sign|doesn't try new ways to attract women,]] and has a very hard time coping with his banishment from [[the GAMe PLACe]]--where he would usually spend his Fridays. This might be resistance to change of his old life style of just going to school and coming home and playing video games; his proven tendencies to avoid responsibilities and self improvement show that he is trying to remain a child or simply fears failure of all types.

==Chris's misconceptions about autism==
It's not clear that Chris has any understanding of what, precisely, autism is, except that a) he has it, b) it's a bad thing, and c) he's a brave little boy for living with it. His song [[A-U-T-I-S-M]] sums up his attitudes about the disorder:

{{quote|A-U-T-I-S-M: what does it mean? Silence and friends unseen! A few brains as well: that is autism! And that makes us seem special to you!|Chris, attempting to spell out autism in more ways than one}}

To Chris, that's all it is — a condition that makes you a bit smarter than normal human beings and mysteriously makes people not want to be your friend.

Chris also seems to only be aware of the symptoms of autism that fit in with his odd, pseudo-Bohemian lifestyle. Asexuality is very common in autistic people; this is because any form of romance or sex is too intimate for an autistic mind to cope with. This completely contradicts Chris's "[[Love Quest]]" and suggests that he is actually trying to compensate for his inability to feel true sexual attraction, even if that means becoming a genuinely disturbing pervert.

Chris [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|considers himself to have "Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People",]] suggesting that he believes [[Chris and his Ego|the disorder did not even exist before he was born]].

In a [[May 2010]] [[Some Favored Comedians|video]], he stated that our society is spending so much time on the internet that ''everyone'' is becoming autistic.<ref>[[Toucher and Rich Segment#Chris's Response|Chris responds to Toucher and Rich, May 2009]]</ref><ref>[[Some Favored Comedians]]</ref> This further proves that people with little to no social contact shouldn't attempt social commentary.
That, and Chris has no fucking clue what his own disorder is actually ''like''. More recently he tried to use this excuse to guilt trip [[Jackie]] into being sorry for yelling at him, which worked as well as you'd expect.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref>

===Chris on the causes of autism===
There's a broad scientific consensus that autism largely arises from genetic factors. Chris's own case is consistent with the theory that children born to older parents are at greater risk of developing autism.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_autism#Genetics</ref> Bob and Barb were 54 and 40, respectively, when Chris was conceived.

Chris's own expressed views on the root causes of autism are all over the map. He's espoused a few different theories at different times and in different situations. His oldest theory, dating back to the [[Song of Christian]] in the late 1990s, is that the [[abusive babysitter]] was responsible for his condition. In more recent years (specifically, during [[Mumble 3|his arguments with]] [[Clyde Cash]] in early 2009), he said that "scientifically speaking, [autism] has possibly come from a drug, or otherwise it may possibly be genetic", and that the babysitter incident merely "brought out the, uh, curse that was buried within me."

When explaining his condition to [[Father Call|Matt Devoria]] late in the fall of 2009, Chris insisted that autism has no genetic factors. In that instance, however he had an obvious agenda. He hoped to convince Matt that any children he fathered with Matt's daughter [[Kacey]] wouldn't wind up inheriting his condition; because of this, it's difficult to say exactly how sincere he happened to be at that moment.

To muddle the issue even ''further'', in [[Mailbag 12]], Chris blamed the cause of autism on a shot "the doctor's [sic] optionally give to the child after birth", apparently in reference to the highly disputed [[wikipedia:MMR vaccine controversy|urban myth]] alleging that childhood vaccinations lead to autism. It's not likely that Chris even has that much of an awareness of the facts and assertions of said myth, and was probably looking for a throwaway excuse to deny any hereditary factors.

In his [[Autism Tutorial Part 1|Autism Tutorial]] from early 2011, Chris slewed back toward a more mainstream view, discussing the genetic factors behind autism and complaining about how his parents conceived him late in life. He also, however, warned viewers that smoking, drinking, or exposure to car exhaust could cause dangerous genetic damage that might result in autistic children.

===Chris versus Asperger syndrome===
{{see also|Asperger syndrome}}

Chris is easily outraged by any attempt to associate or confuse autism, high-functioning or otherwise, with Asperger syndrome, a similar condition now considered by many experts to overlap with HFA on the autistic spectrum. (In fact, it has been proposed that Asperger syndrome be placed on the autism spectrum in the new DSM-V, making both the condition and "high-functioning autism" one and the same.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DSM-V#Asperger_syndrome</ref>) At times, Chris has stated that he dislikes Asperger syndrome because sufferers of the disorder supposedly steal sympathy away from autism awareness. He has also claimed that the name is too close to "ass burger" or "ass booger" for his taste. In the early days of the CWCipedia Mailbag, asking Chris about Asperger syndrome was the most effective way to troll him; this culminated in the creation of [[Asperchu]].

In the present, Chris simply hates Asperger syndrome because it reminds him of how angry he got the last time someone brought it up - in other words, a completely unjustifiable opinion. Chris has declared himself "close-minded" on the subject, dismissing all scientific opinion contrary to his own, and angrily refuses to be convinced that he does not occupy a more favorable (exactly what that means depends on whether Chris is looking for pity or adulation at the time) tier of the spectrum.

==Chris on autism education==
Chris is a firm believer in mainstream education for children with autism, a trait he doubtlessly picked up from his parents, who went to [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|incredible lengths]] to keep him in mainstream classrooms throughout his school years. Aside from speech therapy lessons intended to help him recover from his period of muteness as a child, as far as the available records indicate, Chris has never received any sort of special education geared towards dealing with his autism or related issues.

[[Mailbag 12|When asked for his advice on how to raise an autistic child]], Chris replied "...Most Importantly, MAINSTREAM; let your child be free to communicate and associate with the Normal Society. Special Education is okay, but that will not do in the longest run." Later, [[Mailbag 15|for advice on how "to succeed despite being afflicted with Asperger's"]], Chris's only response was, "My advice is to Mainstream the child."

During a [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|video from April 2010]], Chris read off a lengthy printout of autism-related information. After quoting a passage about how the education of autistic children should be undertaken by trained professionals in specialized settings, Chris offered his own opinion.

{{quote|As for me though, I highly recommend mainstreaming, lettin' 'em go though normal life. I mean yeah, give 'em the special treatment while they're young... but when you get 'em in elementary or middle school... or high school, mainstream is the way to go.|Chris, [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]}}

In short, Chris believes that the approach that produced the man as we know him today (i.e. ignoring the problem) is the best possible way to raise and educate children with autism.

==Autism cured?==

[[Image:454-CWCsPossibleFuture.JPG|thumb|Autism appears to be in Chris's future...]]

Chris's greatest dream is that his autism might one day be cured (although in 2006 he would have unhesitatingly sacrificed such a cure in order to obtain a [[PS3|PlayStation 3]]). There are instances of children inexplicably recovering from the symptoms, but there is no known cure for autism that can simply be applied to everyone like Chris's "homo vaccine." Imagine the surprise of the mental health community, then, when Chris revealed in [[March 2009]] that he had overcome his autism once and for all:<ref>[[Sarah Reveals Herself]]</ref>

:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I'm not going to blame it on my autism; I have realized that I am over that now.
:'''Sarah May:''' Over what?
:'''Sarah May:''' Over your autism?
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' yes
:'''Sarah May:''' . . .
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' anyway, what is it that you want to do?
:'''Sarah May:''' Christian
:'''Sarah May:''' Are you serious?
:'''Sarah May:''' Autism is not influenza
:'''Sarah May:''' You don't 'get over it'
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I've broken out of my autistic shell, and I am better able to socialize in public, with the past practices online.

Chris claims during the same chat that he may not be making sense due to a virus, easily allowing for him to retract this. Fortunately, Chris has discovered that [[stress]] is a more socially popular scapegoat for his personal shortcomings. Of course, people learn to manage stress, but what do you expect?

As of [[May 2009]], Chris seems to have regained his autism and is back to [[Wikipedia|blaming it]] for all his problems, seemingly believing that autism is as easy to shake/regain as the common flu.

[[November 2009]] saw Chris claiming to have cured his autism again as stated at the end of part 2 on his [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] presentations (where he describes himself as a "high-functioning autistic ''recovered''"). A [[December 2009|month later]], Chris says in the [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|revised ED article]] in response to ED's claim he's "suffering" from autism, he comments "''which I still am for real.''"

Chris's flip-flopping self-diagnosis simply illustrates his misunderstanding of his problems. Since autism is his scapegoat for when he fucks up, to him that's really all it is — a disease that makes people fuck up all the time. Therefore, when he fails he has a bad case of autism, and when everything is going well (such as when he believes he has a girlfriend) he thinks the autism has gone away. What Chris really wants, then, is not a cure for autism but to live a life in which nothing happens that he would need to blame on his autism; that is, a life in which he has a girlfriend and nobody criticizes him.

==Things Chris has not blamed on his autism==
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|What did you expect?]]

==Chris and other autistics==

Listening to Chris go on about "us TRUE and HONEST autistics", you might think he has some kind of misplaced sense of autistic solidarity. But this would merely be dumb, and Chris-chan always shoots for both dumb and repugnant, so in reality he doesn't give a shit about anyone's autism but his own. He calls lower-functioning autistics than himself "windows into hell"<ref>[[IRC (17 December 2008)]]</ref> and regards them with [[Chris and Hypocrisy|exactly the same kind of fear and mistrust he bitches about people treating him with]]. He has also expressed a disdain for others with high-functioning autism, with HFA being one of the characteristics excluding a woman from being a [[attraction sign|potential sweetheart]]. Meanwhile, he looks at people with [[Asperger Syndrome]], who are on roughly the same part of the spectrum as him, as dirty whores trying to somehow steal the limelight from "real" autistics (read: Chris).

Chris has only once included another autistic person in his comics. In emails with [[Sarah Jackson]], she told Chris that her sister was also a high-functioning autistic. When Sarah was included in [[Episode_19#Episode_19:_Date_Ed_.28Even_Though_the_Idea_Sounds_Dated.29|Episode 19]], so was her sister, [[Rita]]. When Rita was given dialogue after Sarah's [[death]], what she said made so little sense grammatically (even for [[Chris and writing|Chris's standards]]) that it is hard to see it as unintentional. It can be speculated from this that Chris, thinking his own autism so much better than anyone else's, was attempting to make Rita seem very unintelligent as he assumes other autistics and people with mental disorders are.

For their part, [[A-Logging|people with autism universally facepalm when they look at Chris, and wish he'd fuck off and die and stop giving them a bad name]]. The deleted article about Chris on [[TV Tropes]] said it best: they wish he'd Stop Being Stereotypical and embodying the worst perceptions of their condition. The article also noted that to people with autism or Asperger's, Chris was "Paranoia Fuel", that is to say it scares them to think they're like him. For the actual high-functioning autistics out there, Chris himself is the "window onto hell".

The Aspies for Freedom website has had a couple of run-ins with Chris that nicely demonstrate how other autistics regard him:

* <s>[http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=14371 Aspies For Freedom thread]</s> where Chris or someone impersonating Chris asks for help against [[ED]]. The aspies offer the usual advice of ignoring the [[trolls]], which by the way is the best advice.

* <s>[http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=15676 Aspies For Freedom thread]</s> where someone asks about Chris, but everyone else just wants to avoid the drama. A few of them realize that what ED says is true even though it may be a "hate site". Apparently, previous drama involving Chris led them to disable registration.

Tl;dr: Chris has no support in the online autistic community unless it's from someone who would rather he commit suicide.

== Sources ==
<references/>

==See also==
* [[Asperger syndrome]]
* [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]
* [[A-U-T-I-S-M]]
* [[Autism Tutorial]]
* [[Chris and psychology]]
* [[Kick the Autistic]]
* [[Slow-in-the-minds]]
* [[Stress]]

==External links==
*<s>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ix5Ith-fSU One Winged Autistic]</s> (dead link as of Jun 2014)

{{CWC-isms}}
{{Love quest}}

[[Category:Autistic Spectrum Disorders]]
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]