CWCki - User contributions [en]

Talk:03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV

2010-03-21T20:00:15Z

Orly444:

Fuck yeah. Also, someone else can transcribe this one: I transcribe too many of them and this one is particularly sad. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 19:42, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

I'll get this one done. [[User:Artiph|Artiph the Destroyer, Omniscient Archmage, bearer of the Grimoire of Destruction, whose powers by and large surpass that of the Great Wizard CrassCrab, Lord of the Seven Realm and Master of the Archane Black Arts of the Eleventh Trans-Dimensional Vortex]] 19:44, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

== Leaving the internet? Oh lawd. ==

This is yet another empty promise that he won't keep. Anyone agree with me on this? --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 19:56, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

I doubt he'll stay out of the internet for long, but this video shows too much hypocrisy, and how smug and full of himself Chris can be, and shows, that the only thing he learned was to gtfo of the internet when everything went for the worst, and it took him 3 years.But in the case he really left; What direction will the CWCki take now? will it simply wait for the trolls to lure Chris back in the internet?.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 19:59, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

*I'll give him two weeks at the maximum. Maybe three. [[User:Orly444|Orly444]] 20:00, 21 March 2010 (UTC)

File talk:FuckYouTito.jpg

2010-03-20T21:46:19Z

Orly444:

Oh Jesus, I hope I'm not the only one who burst out laughing when I saw the sign in the background. '''[[User:Odettafag|blind justice.]]''' [[User talk:Odettafag|to each his own.]] 16:51, 20 March 2010 (UTC)
:You mean the dog goal sign. Of course, it's typical Chris nature for him to own something like that. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 18:24, 20 March 2010 (UTC)

Nice pelican neck, Chris! [[User:Orly444|Orly444]] 21:46, 20 March 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Happy Sonichu Day

2010-03-18T04:33:23Z

Orly444: /* Oh, the irony */

Talk:Happy Sonichu Day

2010-03-18T03:36:18Z

Orly444:

I'm going to TRANSCRIBE DIS BITCH so hard that she may very well be destroyed by the process.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:11, 18 March 2010 (UTC)
:I hate it when Chris calls himself an artist, ruins my day, also, go Beat and transcribe dis bitch to the EXTREME!.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 03:18, 18 March 2010 (UTC)
:Do it NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW. Youtube is broken on my ISP for some reason and I'm missing all the fun. --[[User:Draygoon|Draygoon]] 03:20, 18 March 2010 (UTC)

== Oh, the irony ==
I find it exceedingly funny he calls this Tito fellow a, "Womanizer".

It's also funny how he keeps giving away Wallflower's name. [[User:Orly444|Orly444]] 03:36, 18 March 2010 (UTC)

Church audio

2010-01-31T23:13:33Z

Orly444:

On 15 [[March 2009]], [[Robert Simmons V]] and an undercover [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] visit Chris's [[Chris and Religion|church]] and approach the [[Chris|manchild]] in the flesh unsuspectingly.

The '''audio recording''' of this event lasts 1:47:48. Throughout, Chris's voice is much louder than everyone else's.

Chris says he's keeping his distance from instant messages. He'd rather not talk about who hacked his Yahoo! account. [[Bob]] is there, but Chris reveals that [[Barbara]] usually stays home.

Chris excuses himself to leave Bob to talk to Robert for a few minutes. Bob talks about jerks on the internet, Chris's condition, and early video games. When Chris comes back, he realizes that it's [[fail|funny both Bob and Robert have the same name]].

Chris talks about Robert's trouble with finding a girlfriend. Chris has made the final decision to talk to local girls instead of ones on the internet. He's gotten encouragement from [[Rocky]] with ''[[How to Talk to Girls]]''. He talked to 7 girls just last Thursday at [[Alderman Library]], but got a fake number. Chris was emotionally prepared for the fake number from ''Seinfeld''. Bob mentions the [[Sonichu Girls]] club.

Chris rambles on about ''[[Family Guy]]'' and Stewie quoting the bible against [[homo]]sexuality. His copy of the bible with Leviticus is different from the church's because it was a graduation gift from Reverend Shin of the Korean church in Chesterfield County. Bob talks about North Korea.

After asking Robert for a pen, Chris makes his signature and hands it to Robert, [[Chris and his ego|saying it could be valuable one day.]]

They start reciting verses and singing hymns for many minutes. Chris gets to pick a verse for everyone to sing. Bob gets the second pick. Then other people pick. Chris wails over everyone else in some of them.

Afterward, Robert reunites with the other troll. They drive away contemplating on Leviticus, raping Emiry and other unrelated nonsense.

==Transcript==

===00:00:00 - Pre-Troll Warmup===
 '''Robert Simmons V''': It's rolling now, so... (noise and pops) Is it recording still? Yes it is. Oh yeah. Not good. (a few seconds pass) Citizens of the Internet! This is Robert Simmons V, better known as Sonichufan1985, -1986 and now, -1987. I wish you all a good morning! The reason I am talking today on this voice recorder is to talk about about how I'm gonna meet Mr. Christian Chandler, my personal hero. Now, although if you're looking at my old account, Sonichufan1986, you would think that I don't like Mr. Chandler. That's a lie, a slanderous lie.


(unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Maybe I should just talk normal. You think he wouldn't even fuckin'... 

'''Troll #1''': Okay, you heard Julie, right?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah

'''Troll #1''': So you heard that.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah. I'll just talk like he's probably still a threat. 

'''Troll #1''': (Does an impersonation of Chris, unintelligible quote)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': We're doing it now. Did you hear about that quote?

'''Troll #1''': Yeah yeah yeah, there's this retard or something...?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah we were talking about it on IRC and (becomes unintelligible) he-he's kind of a window to hell... and he also said that people in wheelchairs are are mentally retarded. 

'''Troll #1''': I know. Stephen Hawking?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Doesn't fucking matter. He's fucking retarded. Evil Shenanigans... He thinks Clyde took Julie hostage that one time.

'''Troll #1''': Yeah.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': He's like, "Ok, if you don't do-if you don't say you're gay I will lop off her arm," and he said "Oh, I-I'm a gaybian." Remember that?

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, yeah.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': (laughs) 

'''Troll #1''': (mockingly) I'm gay 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I'm gay

'''Troll #1''': I'm gay 

(laughter)

'''Troll #1''': I'm a male lesbian

(unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I spoke to one of my friends after I called you and he's like, "That sucks." He's like, "Really?" (mocking) "No, not really..."

(laughter)

(random chatter, mostly unintelligible, much dealing with recent happenings with Chris)

'''Troll #1''': Do you know what car he drives?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Uh... probably the Son-chu car? 

'''Troll #1''': Do you remember what his parents drive?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Shit, nah... I dunno.

(More chatter, Robert asks about a Pickle Suit)

===00:06:27 - A Wild Chris-Chan Appears===

(the sounds of people inside the church are heard)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Hi, I'm Robert!

 '''Chris''': Robert Simmons the Fifth?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yes sir.

 '''Chris''': Oh my God. Ni-Nice to meet ya.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': That's good, that's good. I want to apologize my uh... my um Sonichufan1986 page was hacked by Clyde Cash, so... so I want to apologize for that in case I sent you weird emails or YouTube stuff.

 '''Chris''': (chuckles) Well, I understand. Nice to meet you, Bob.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Is it okay if I come to church with you? I'm actually like here for us... you know, for my... vacation.

 '''Chris''': Sure, you know. You're welcome.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh, Thank you.

 '''Chris''': Did you uh talk to Elizabeth our pastor?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh, no. Do you know where I can find her?

 '''Chris''': Uh yeah, she's in her office if you want to go say hello. 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Okay. (walking) Hi! I don't mean to bother, I'm just here to just uh... I'm actually we're here on vacation meeting some people... Is it okay if I come to church though?

'''Elizabeth''': Of course!

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Okay, awesome, thank you.

(more walking, random chatter)

 '''Chris''': My dad... you know (drown out by noise)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Is your mom... is coming as well? Or is she feeling sick?

 '''Chris''': No... No she usually stays home.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I see. So how's everything with you?

 '''Chris''': [[Stress sigh|'sigh']] Things have been going good. Keepin... Keeping my distance from the ah instant messages and whatnot. Kind of... you know. It's been peacefull. Unfortunately the Sonichu site has been... uh... has been down for uh... 'bout a week-r... 'bout a week or two. Since uh... Yeah since my Yahoo account got... got uh hacked into... and all tha-and all that jazz.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Mhm. Do you know who hacked it?

 '''Chris''': 'sigh' Yep. But I'd rather-I'd rather not talk about it.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Okay. That's fine.

 '''Chris''': So did you hear about uh... did you hear about my recent, uh... internet romance with uh... [[BlueSpike#Julie|Julie Movanya]]?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Let me turn off my cell phone... Um...

===00:09:18 - In Walked Bob===

 '''Chris''': Yeah, me too... Oh, [[Bob Chandler|Dad]], this is Robert Simmons the Fifth one of my Sonichu fans!

 '''Robert Simmons V''': How's it going, Mr. Chandler?

 '''Chris''': This is my father, Robert.

'''Bob Chandler''': Let me just go on by ya here... Let me just go on by ya here...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh, thank you sir. 

 '''Chris''': (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': How is everything?

'''Bob Chandler''': I'm good.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': That's good.

 '''Chris''': I'll let you two chat for a bit I've gotta go (unintelligible)

'''Bob Chandler''': Chris is really into that stuff.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, so... Yeah... I'm sure that, like ... I've heard there's, like, a lot of things going on, though.

'''Bob Chandler''': Yeah, he's got enemies all over the world.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah...

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah... it's just a lot of jerks online.

'''Bob Chandler''': I'm 81... and I've seen a lot of things in my life, and I've done a lot. But uh, whenever you're successful at something, from my experience, there are people that don't like that and they're out to get you for it.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, people can't, you know, appreciate some success and be happy for them you have to feel jealousy for it though... 

'''Bob Chandler''': (laughs) Yeah, they want to knock you down. 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah

'''Bob Chandler''': Yeah, you know he's a high-functioning autistic, but he's come a looong way. I can remember, I was ticked off when he was six, and we were working with him and we didn't know what was wrong with him, and yet he didn't have the diagnosis.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': mhm.

'''Bob Chandler''': I have a Commodore 64. If you've ever heard of those...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, yeah! Um, my-my dad had one of those though, he also had... I think it's called Amiga?

'''Bob Chandler''': That's an actual system. Anyway, I taught him how to do that, and he was loading discs on that Commodore 64 and playing with it before he could talk.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': (laughs)

'''Bob Chandler''': And of course after that... they came along with all sorts of video games.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah, yeah

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible) We got one of the first Nintendos... (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, I know how that is.

'''Bob Chandler''': I remember this one, what did they call it? Mario World?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, I've heard of that.

'''Bob Chandler''': That one's I spent 150-200 levels... and and after I got through King Koopa... I couldn't get off of Yoshi's Island... and I'm an engineer... or was. I'm retired now.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Uh huh.

'''Bob Chandler''': And I couldn't remember how to get off of Yoshi's Island... I couldn't remember what was coming next, well he got up to King Koopa in two days.

 '''Chris''': (suddenly reappears) haha, did you get a copy of this weeks bulletin?

'''Bob Chandler''': He gets these games and I'm the one who ends up paying for them and he keeps them-

 '''Robert Simmons V''': haha, there's always renting, though. So... you could just go to Blockbuster and rent games for a couple days.

'''Bob Chandler''': I wish he'd do that, it'd save him some money.

 '''Chris''': hmm.

'''Bob Chandler''': Save me some money...

 '''Chris''': Father, game's not so easy to beat nowadays... plus there's (unintelligible) 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, that is true.

'''Bob Chandler''': You go to school here?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': No, um I actually live in
Christiansburg, So I'm meeting some-

'''Bob Chandler''': You live in Christiansburg?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yes sir.

'''Bob Chandler''': That's a long drive.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yes sir, it is

 '''Chris''': yeah...

'''Bob Chandler''': That's up there near VPI, right?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yes sir, Virginia Tech

'''Bob Chandler''': I was in (unintelligible) for a lot of years. 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh really?

'''Bob Chandler''': I worked for GE down there for about 15 years, then got transferred to uh (unintelligible) 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': mhm

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible) I like the Johnson area, it's beautiful there 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Very pretty. Yeah, I was driving down here this-uh this morning though and I was surprised though. I-I've never really been here (unintelligible) I have a couple of friends here, and... it was really foggy though. Um, I believe that it was 64?

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible) 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah.

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible) 

===00:14:26 - The Love Quest Continues===

 '''Chris''': (interrupts) Oh...Hey, uh father did uh Bob here tell ya that uh... you know it's funny you both are named Robert better yet you could both be called Bob! Yeah, anyway uh... he-uh he's been having trouble finding himself girlfriends too.

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible) 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah.

 '''Chris''': Yeah, by the way Bob, by the way Bob, uh for your information, uh... I've actually uh... after I spaced myself from the internets I made the fond decision to go back into uh local areas and start talking to girls, so I go-got some encouragement from Rocky. I also uh, I looked at this little uh, short picture-short uh red picture book by uh... that came from a 9-year old. Called "How to Talk to Girls".

 '''Robert Simmons V''': hmm. mhm.

 '''Chris''': It's by... Alec... Goldwin? Something like that? Anywa-Anyway it's like ten dollars. It's a good book.

'''Bob Chandler''': You should tell him he's gotta (unintelligible) 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah... Isn't there a dating service? That... isn't there? I'm sure there's a dating services around here, right? 

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible) 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah, yeah. 

 '''Chris''': Anyway, I talked to seven girls uh this last Thursday over at uh... Alderman library. So that was-that was a big start for me. I mana-I managed to get a phone number out of one of them but unfortunately it was a fa-Unfortunately it was a bad number. You know...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Maybe, did you...

 '''Chris''': The number wasn't-It wasn't a number that was in service.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': oh...

'''Bob Chandler''': (In the background, unintelligible) 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': mhm

 '''Chris''': F-F-Fortunately I was prepared for that... you know. (pauses for a few seconds) Anyway I was emotionally prepared for that, you know 'cause I'd seen a similar situation in an episode of Seinfeld... where... it was one where Elaine was giving was giving a fake phone number to most of the guys she met? And it went to this, uh... racing bet booth? And she's try-and at the end of the episode she's trying to... she-wrote the number on the back of her-on the back of a card that she ha-that she's like once punch away from getting a free sub! And she wanted that free sub!

 '''Robert Simmons V''': (laughs)

 '''Chris''': It's a funny episode... it's a funny episode... you watch Seinfeld?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Um... I used to, though, but, I don't think at least where I'm from they don't really show it anymore though. 

 '''Chris''': You can find it on the FOX stations or TBS...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': oh, okay 

 '''Chris''': Yeah, actually you know two back-to-back episodes most every night 7, 7:30 on TBS.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': mhm... they also have Family Guy on TBS. 

 '''Chris''': Yeah, hey. Did you see the latest episode of Family Guy?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Probably not, no... I don't think so, it was- 

 '''Chris''': It was last Sun-it was last Sunday. They isolated - and injected into Peter - the gay gene.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh really?

 '''Chris''': It lasted for only two and a half weeks. Durli-d-d-during th-during like the first quarter of the-ah the episode, Peter bought for two dollars... a mentally challenged horse. Brain damaged. It was like-he was li-he always gave him like this blank stare...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': uh huh... so what'd he do with the horse?

 '''Chris''': (chuckles) He put th-He put the horse in the race and then the horse-

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Did it win?

 '''Chris''': No.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': (Laughs)

 '''Chris''': No, but the horse ran into the crowd and uh cause a whole bunch of chaos and then the horse died of a heart attack from the excitement. 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': ohhh

 '''Chris''': And Peter chucked it into Mort's drug store... Mort's pharmacy. 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': ahh... hmm.

 '''Chris''': And Mort's was like, "Oh, I like the days where they'd just throw... they'd just throw uh poo in a bag and uh... 

'''Bob Chandler''': (In the background, unintelligible) 

===00:18:10 - Seth MacFarlane & The Bible===

 '''Chris''': Yeah but anyway, later on in- but anyway... Ahh but anyway later on in the same episode, uh Stewie... brings up a quote... from the Bible, That pretty much uh... spells out for-spells out best in a nutshell, which I did a short-

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, I saw that though... Leviticus?

 '''Chris''': Yeah, Leviticus 18:22. 'sigh' Right there. "No man will lie with a man as one lies with a woman. It is detestable." And then you can read the, uh... read the uh beforehand about uh... what was said to Moses, yadda yadda yadda, and then in the end what happens to those who... commit any of these uh... rules that are unlawful... in sexual relations includi-including animals. Doing it with animals, that's-that's just... detestable and bogus...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': What page is that? 101?

 '''Chris''': No no, it's- uh well mine's a different bible from theirs but you're-you're in the right area. Leviticus 18:22.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Alright...

 '''Chris''': Yeah, my Bible is uh... different from the church's, uh... from this church's bible. I got mine from our uh... Reverend Shin of the uh... Korean church in Chesterfield County, dad?

'''Bob Chandler''': That's right. It was Presbyterian... I wonder where they come for church... anyway they're mostly Presbyterian...

 '''Chris''': Yeah...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': mhmm

 '''Chris''': Anyway, It was a graduation gift from them.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': oh

'''Bob Chandler''': (mostly unintelligible, what can be heard mentions spending time in North Korea)

 '''Chris''': Yeah, North Korea in the Signal Corps, right dad?

'''Bob Chandler''': Before the Korean war, I was in Korea (the rest of the story becomes unintelligible due to crowd noise)

 '''Chris''': I will!

 '''Robert Simmons V''': oh okay

'''Bob Chandler''': (assumed he continues his story, unintelligible due to crowd noise)

As Bob continues his story, Chris mumbles something.

 '''Chris''': Oh, Chapter One.... 18.

Bob continues talking, while Chris mumbles a bit more and does a "hmm" now and again. We hear shuffling through the pocket where the recorder is hidden.

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Um...

'''Bob Chandler''': Blacksburg is over... over by there, isn't it?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, they're-they're... Christiansburg and Blacksburg are right next to each other. Um... I had to go to 81 before I could get to 64.

 '''Chris''': hmmm

'''Bob Chandler''': Yeah, 81 goes for a while then you make a turn and go north. (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, real foggy too and- 

'''Bob Chandler''': You drove down this morning, then?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, fog and-I-I was wondering why they had lights on the road until it's all...

'''Bob Chandler''': Well now you know... Yeah, that's... that's a pretty good drive (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah

 '''Chris''': hmmm

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, it's about two and a half.

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': (chuckles)

 '''Chris''': hmmm

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': (laughs)

 '''Chris''': hmmm

'''Bob Chandler''': That's the big blue ridge where we are... we live... we live just north of here in Ruckersville, and off to the west (unintelligible) about seven-eight miles (unintelligible)... you can see it from our front door.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': hmm.

'''Bob Chandler''': In fact the western edge of it goes right along the parkway.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': oh really?

 '''Chris''': Uh Bob, would you-would you like to sign the registration pad?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': sure

 '''Chris''': Ju-Just sign it on this line, and you can optionally put in your phone number and address-

 '''Robert Simmons V''': okay

 '''Chris''': -you don't have to.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': ...alright

===00:23:38 - The Service Begins===

 '''Robert Simmons V''': here, you can have that back

 '''Chris''': Thanks... oh, just put it back in the pew.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': oh, okay.

 '''Chris''': There's one in the pew.

(30 seconds later...)

 '''Chris''': Hey, lemme see your pen for a second there, Bob.

(30 seconds later...)

 '''Chris''': There ya are. You hold onto that, 'cause that could be valuable one day.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': ...sure.

(something is mentioned about the piano needing to be fixed, it is turned into a joke about firewood)

 '''Chris''': aww

 '''Chris''': that's horrible

===00:26:19-1:33:00 - Churching Highlights===

'''00:28:37 (Chris is chosen to pick a Hymn)'''

 '''Chris''': Ah... let's do verse one of 733.

(Chris chooses Marching to Zion and sings loudly and off-key)

'''00:29:50 (Bob picks a Hymn)'''

'''Bob Chandler''': 95

'''Elizabeth''': 95?

'''Bob Chandler''': (unintelligible)

'''Elizabeth''': 95... and do you have a favorite verse?

'''Bob Chandler''': The one and only.

'''Elizabeth''': There's only one?

(People in the church chuckle while Chris laughs loudly)

(The Hymn starts and Chris once again sings loudly and off-key)

(A Hymn with a ridiculous page number is called out)

 '''Chris''': I'm looking... 2235 B? Oh. Oh, here it is.

(Chris continues to sing the rest of the hymns off-key and loudly)

'''00:48:15 (Other High Functioning Autistics)'''

(Elizabeth is talking about a new family in the parish)

 '''Chris''': Dawson is their, uh... their autistic son. He's high functioning autistic.

===01:33:35 - TTE: TACTICAL TROLL EXTRACTION===
'''Not Elizabeth''': Hi, your name's Robert?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yes

'''Not Elizabeth''': Very nice to meet you. Very good to have you here today!

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Thank you. I like this place, a lot.

'''Not Elizabeth''': Good! Well, hope you come back some day!

(Chris and Robert are talking. It is impossible to understand them due to the organ)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Okay, well you take it easy, okay?

 '''Chris''': (unintelligible due to crowd noise)

(much of the rest of the conversation is unintelligible because of the crowd)

 '''Chris''': Well, you take care, okay?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Okay

===01:36:04 - "That's that"===

 '''Robert Simmons V''': You know, it's very odd 'cause... for such a progressive church though, he was reading Leviticus and shit. Well... he got that from Family Guy.

'''Troll #1''': He looks... for any justification he can find.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': So what did he say to you?

'''Troll #1''': Oh nothing... we were just talking and shit, yeah.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': He told me... like, he knew I was in Australia or some bullshit?

(both break into laughter)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I got a souvenir too, by the way. By-By the way, I need to turn off the goddamn thing...

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, whatever, I mean...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': (commenting on traffic)...I should have gone... oh well

'''Troll #1''': Fuckin' awesome haha

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I met him, I... you know, I have his cell phone number, which I guess, like, everyone already has, 

'''Troll #1''': yeah

 '''Robert Simmons V''': So I think I might actually call him on my cellphone. Hopefully like he won't give it away... 

'''Troll #1''': Probably not.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I don't know... Pretty badass, huh?

'''Troll #1''': Yeah.

(both break into laughter)

'''Troll #1''': I think he'll recognize me when I steal his girl, when I steal his date.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Ugh... well, maybe you should get makeup or something. Green, green makeup.

'''Troll #1''': I... I don't really give a fuck.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I do! Fuck, man! (laughs)

'''Troll #1''': No no no I don't think he'll connect me and you

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Well, okay. Well maybe, you know, that would explain your spying on us, like that would explain the recordings and shit, you know?

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, yeahyeahyeahyeahyeah

(both laugh)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': You'd better edit this shit to where I'm not saying "shit", you know it's always like, it's always like, it's always like... 

'''Troll #1''': (makes noise)

(both laugh)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh, God... I don't want Clyde to have this shit image because he seemed like such a nice guy, dude!

'''Troll #1''': Aww! 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh yeah, look at this... did you see this?

(It can be assumed Robert is showing the Troll the signature given to him by Chris)

(both laugh)

'''Troll #1''': Oh my God...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh yeah, look at this... did you see this?

'''Troll #1''': Well, I wrote down, um... what, uh... which...what things he recommended...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah

'''Troll #1''': Marching to Zion, and Bob suggested Praise God from All... From all of our Saints Blood

 '''Robert Simmons V''': This just... what's so funny, what's so interesting I find is Bob, you know, the Lumberjack, is bad-ass, though. He's a really pleasant guy, though. 

'''Troll #1''': Yeah yeah

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Um... the only problem I feel sorry for is he tried to justify like Chris and shit. Like, apparently like back when he was 6 he couldn't even talk

'''Troll #1''': Yeah?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': and uh, you know, 'cause he's fucking autistic

'''Troll #1''': right, right... God has a mute button on him, that's what he says.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': ...what?

'''Troll #1''': Chris says that God put the mute button on him.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh... well, yeah. Anyways, um... other than being really SHITTY by the way, everybody - It's still all recording - Anyways... hopefully this will provide some entertainment for people, I dunno. But anyways, so um... - what the hell am I saying? oh yeah - so um... (laughs) God... DAMN! (laughs) That dude, you know... you know, it seemed like, "What the hell is that guy wearing a fucking Hardees jacket? You know, that guy looks really fucking sketchy as hell!" (troll laughs) And I go, "Mr. Chandler?" And he go-And he didn't know me for a second. "I'm Robert Simmons Fifth", and h-and he knew me, it's like, and he still thinks I'm awesome! 

(both laugh)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I'm so happy! you know...

'''Troll #1''': Aw yeah, that's awesome

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah... but he gave me his cell phone number which I've-I have to call him up. I can't wait to show my fucking buddies at Tech, man.

(both laugh)

'''Troll #1''': That's pretty funny, man!

(both laugh)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I don't kn-I would lend it to you if you have a scanner or something like that...

'''Troll #1''': I don't have a scanner.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': I'll have to scan it at my, uh... at my fucking campus

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, it's cool, man... fucking awesome

 '''Robert Simmons V''': another piece of internet history right here 

(both laugh)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh my God... comin' from the guy who's driving a fucking white truck with the Obama sticker yeahhhhhh... I'm so happy I didn't have to do, (in Robert Simmons YouTube voice) "MR. CHANDLER!", you know? I'm so happy. I guess you can contribute that to being really nervous online or something like that, but... anyways, apparently Robert the Lumberjack, before he was a lumberjack, I should say - He was an engineer, worked for like GE, and he's been like-

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, yeah

 '''Robert Simmons V''': So he's pretty badass...

'''Troll #1''': Well well, he k-well, Chris keeps on going on about how Bob invented plastic. That's what he tells people. 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Oh shit.

'''Troll #1''': He tells people that Bob invented that. Now what Bob actually did was... he designed the controls for one of th- for one of th-the first plastic molding machines.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Mmhm

'''Troll #1''': Now... I think that probably Bob was probably just some sort of like low-level engineer or some shit like that... Now he's a cool guy, I'm just saying, I don't think-

 '''Robert Simmons V''': He's not the plastic maker...

'''Troll #1''': yeah

 '''Robert Simmons V''': That's more like, chemistry, I would think.

'''Troll #1''': You could probably take another person, another engineer and replace Bob with him and you'd get the exact same fucking thing.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah...

'''Troll #1''': Now, Bob's a cool guy, Bob's a, Bob's a loveable guy.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': He is so... He is so awesome, though. Seriously. I actually, you know, I think people might be pissed when they're hearing this shit, 'cause like... I actually talked more to Bob 'cause he was interesting as fuck, though, and like, you know telling me about like the Commodore 64 and how, you know, before fucking Chris could speak, he was playing video games, though. And how, according to him (Bob voice) "124 levels, tryin' to get to Koopa" And he pulls out Yoshi's Island and I'm like, "Dude, you're talking about fuckin' four different games, dumbass." But, whatever, you know, he's old... I could see me saying that to my grandma, "Yeah, whatever grandma... Japan's awesome. right." So...

(both laugh)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': aww... goddamn. I should really stop this, but oh well. Like, the tape is...

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, whatever...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Anyways, um... so, yeah. Hopefully they'll like hear it all, though. Bob, I can definitely tell it's gonna be really hard to hear 'em. So...

'''Troll #1''': ...an Asian market and (unintelligible)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, it was surprising...

'''Troll #1''': yeah?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': A lotta weeaboos here in fuckin... UVA shit, man

'''Troll #1''': yeah?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah, I would assu-I don't know, I'm sure there's a, you know... there's weeaboos everywhere

'''Troll #1''': yeah...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': there's a fun-there's these two shops called The Beholder's Eye and Fun & Games, two different shops and they, like pander to the Warhammer crowd and shit?

'''Troll #1''': yeah?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': So... which I'm not like, you know, against per-say, it's too nerdy for me though but I like the story and shit but I'm not gonna pay money for like you know fucking models and shit.

'''Troll #1''': well, yeah b-

 '''Robert Simmons V''': If Centennial's hearing this, like, if she will hear this and shit, yeah, fuck you, Centennial. 

'''Troll #1''': (laughs)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Dawn of War's better.

'''Troll #1''': W-well like I'm a huge computer nerd and shit like that, and I would've, there's like so much shit that I want to get into, but I don't have the money and time...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah.

'''Troll #1''': Like my fucking classes? Fucking raping me.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, I'm also fuckin- I'm a fucktard with computers and shit, though. I'm relatively new. Should have, like... Should've seen me, and I like... I mean I talk to Cameron all the time though 'cause she's the most helpful, like, she's all motherly and shit.

'''Troll #1''': (laughs) yeah...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': So like, (Robert Simmons YouTube voice) "Uh, how do I do thiiiis?" I'm like Chris-Chan, you know, with fucking.

'''Troll #1''': You see, in high school for years... I couldn't drive? And like... my aunt didn't want to take me places? 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah.

'''Troll #1''': So all I did in my spare time was program, like, in my room. I just sat there and programmed 24/7. So I'm really fucking good at programming. That's the only thing I'm good at. I didn't play video games 'cause I couldn't play video games so all I did was program.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': What time is it, by the way?

'''Troll #1''': It's... 12:23.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Alright. I guess... we can go find PetSmart but I wanna find it online, first.

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, okay.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yes, we'll go see [[Emily|that bitch]].

'''Troll #1''': (laughs) it's gonna be a long time...

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, so... you don't even know what she looks like, right?

'''Troll #1''': Uh, no I don't know what she looks like. She blurred out her face in um... She put signs on his front lawn that said like, "Love, [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]" or some shit like that or [[Jimmy Hill]] or something like that. I know it at least said Encyclopedia Dramatica. She put pictures on his lawn and there's just pictures of her standing there looking like a dumbass... and um... 

 '''Robert Simmons V''': What a dumb bitch. Bottom line: She should be raped.

(both break into laughter)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': We're gonna edit that shit out!

'''Troll #1''': But yeah, so um... (unintelligible) I'm just so fucking pumped to just stroll in there and say, "Hey Chris" or my buddy was saying, "Hey buddy, uh, mind if I talk to your sister here real quick?"

 '''Robert Simmons V''': No, I don't know... hopefully he'll, like, he'll not... no, he's too stupid to put two and two together. I'm still safe.

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, yeah yeah... and if he started to he'd be like, "BOB, ARE YOU IN LEAGUE WITH THE PICKLE MAN?" and you'd be like, "No,"

 '''Robert Simmons V''': No...

'''Troll #1''': "He tricked me!" and he'd be like, "Okay, okay..."

 '''Robert Simmons V''': is this... the place? No? It's not, fuck it. I gotta get some gas anyways. Shit... oh, there it is! That's the thing, it's so far away, it's like..., it's like off the road it's like "Am I... going to the right place?" Hmm. So. I think they're just going to go home then, I don't know. How was that church by the way? 'Cause... fuck!

'''Troll #1''': Boring as hell.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah... I mean, I'm really surprised that the bitch was really progressive...

'''Troll #1''': Yeah

 '''Robert Simmons V''': It's mind boggling that Chris, like the first thing he showed me was Leviticus 18 about the...

'''Troll #1''': Wait... he showed you where?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Well, sitting with him and shit.

'''Troll #1''': Are you serious, he brought up fucking Leviticus? What the fuck? (Chris impression) "MAN WILL NOT LIE WITH ANOTHER MAN!"

 '''Robert Simmons V''': yeah...

'''Troll #1''': Are you fucking kidding me?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': No, no... it's in here. so...

'''Troll #1''': Holy... Holy flying fuck. I know he did it in the video. This is in fucking real life? In fucking church?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': Yeah, it's weird, too, because like, he got sort of from getting from the pastor, who obviously is, you know, very progressive. 

'''Troll #1''': She was just talking about how you could like, "Doodily doodily do, laws don't matter, that's okay whatever." 

'''Troll #1''': Yeah, exactly.

(both laugh)

 '''Robert Simmons V''': "I CAN SAY 'FUCK' 'CAUSE IT'S THA DEVIL!" Yeah, I've heard preachers say, "YOU TELL THAT DEVIL TO GO TO HELL. WHAT? IT'S LEGAL!" so...

'''Troll #1''': Well, we have, um, we have one of those open air... well we have an open preacher who comes to my college every now and then,

 '''Robert Simmons V''': mmhm

'''Troll #1''': And one of these days while he's there I wanna just go out and like hand out like pamphlets saying about... how like all of the health benefits of masturbation, right?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': oh yeah.

'''Troll #1''': And I'll be in my pickle suit, walking around like, I'm looking like a complete jackass. Who are they gonna pay attention to? You know, the guy who's telling me to go to hell or the guy who's telling how how good it is to touch your ding dong?

 '''Robert Simmons V''': It's still going, an hour forty-seven... here you go. I'm retarded when it comes to electronics. (in the background) ...got his phone number and shit... 

'''Troll #1''': yeah, shit man.

 '''Robert Simmons V''': if you've got a green (unintelligible) show it to me, alright?

'''Troll #1''': Yeah.

[[Category:Trolling]]

== download ==

*[http://www.mediafire.com/?iwldnjimezz Full church audio]

(May God have mercy on your pitiful soul.)

Chris and race

2010-01-16T23:34:53Z

Orly444: /* Barack Obama */

'''Chris's racist''' tendencies can be traced at least partially to his southern heritage, but certain other factors seem to imply that the rest of Chris's worldview on race comes from stereotypes depicted by popular culture. In some cases, however, he seems to be completely unfamiliar with even the stereotypes, opting to make up a bunch of bullshit off the top of his head.

==Blacks==
[[Image:GrandWizards4Sonichu.jpg|thumb|Chris approves as he attends a [[Gay4Sonichu|Klansmen 4 Sonichu]] meetup.]]

Chris demonstrates many instances of intolerance and racism, both intentional and unintentional. His racism comes from several sources: his father, his isolated formative years, television, and his complete ignorance of everything that isn't him. Black people, in particular, are a common target for his xenophobia, hence the word "niggo".

===Origin of the word "niggo"===
[[Image:Lynch_to_the_supreme.jpg|thumb|Chris doesn't trust them new niggers over there.]]
'''Niggos''' is one of [[Chris]]'s many minced oaths, this one meant to refer to black people. His only known use of the term was in the [[Julie Reveals Herself|03 March 2009 chat]] where [[BlueSpike]] coerced him into saying ''"[[BILLY MAYS]] is the new mayor of [[CWCville]], and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggers'''."'' Chris repeated the line as ordered, but (being retarded as usual) ignored his instructions and attempted to outsmart BlueSpike by saying '''"niggos"''' instead of the dreaded N-word. Yes, out of all the things Chris could have done (you know, refused to say the N-word, said "N-word" or "blacks" or "African Americans" or some similar term, bleep himself out, or just not be a retard and end the conversation) he chose to coin a retarded ''and'' offensive term which, as if to add insult to injury, sounds like a lame brand of cereal.

It should be noted that Chris's creativity was completely in vain. [[BlueSpike]] pointed out Chris's faggotry, and our autistic hero had to spell out "nigger" properly several times. He even got the hang of it, and started singing [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|"Don't trust them new niggers over there"]] on his own will. So much for respecting the minorities.

As of now, Chris never again used the word "niggo", and probably doesn't even remember the whole incident. However, "niggo" is still considered a [[CWC-ism]], and is classified as a CWC-neologism.

==="No Darkies"===
[[Image:Nodarkies.JPG|thumb|Chris approved of this pic, and said he liked it.]]
{{protip|Chris never said or wrote "No darkies", nor has he ever used the word "darkie". That doesn't make him a non-racist, however.}}
Chris has been widely considered to be racist against black people since it was learned that his highly specific criteria for a [[sweetheart]] includes whiteness and specifically excludes blackness.<ref>[[Attraction Sign]]</ref><ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009]]</ref> Chris does not only tell this to trolls, however, he has told black [[boyfriend-free girls]] that they do not "meet his standard criteria for a female companion". To their faces.<ref>[[Autism papers|Chris's psychiatric examination]]</ref> Trolls quickly coined the phrase "No darkies" as a quick summary of Chris's criteria for a sweetheart, much to his chagrin.

Some may argue whether excluding "darkies" from the list of Chris's potential [[Sweetheart|heartsweets]] is actually an act of racism and discrimination against black women. He has insisted that he has nothing against black women, but as he is trying to find a mother for [[Crystal]] (who was white in the original "prophetic dream"), he simply has no interest in procreating with black women. Either way, he expressed it in an un-diplomatic way, as he is wont to do. Quite possibly, it could be considered an act of racism and discrimination against ''white'' women, as they are specifically selected as the manchild's possible victims of stalking and harassment. Chris also stated that he doesn't hate men who have black girlfriends, and doesn't necessarily consider them [[JERKS]], so Chris may think it'll increase his chances of finding a white boyfriend-free girl.

===Niggos in Chris's life===
[[Image:0242-CWC&VarsityBBallTeam97Color.jpg|thumb|Watch your back pocket, Chris!]]

There were some 12-15 year old black kids who frequented [[The GAMe PLACe]]. Chris picked on them and acted like they wanted to steal from him, hiding his stuff when they were nearby.<ref>[[Mimms]] [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/pvcc/viewtopic.php?p=16855#p16855 post] on [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]]</ref> The reason Chris got banned permanently from The GAMe PLACe was getting into a shouting match with one of these kids.

Chris also once argued with a huge black guy named TJ. When they started talking about how Chris would never get laid, Chris yelled, "I'm going to smack your effing face down!" As TJ stood up like he was going to beat Chris's ass, Chris shrunk and whimpered, "I mean your face down monster..."<ref>[[Mimms]] [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/pvcc/viewtopic.php?p=17281#p17281 post] on [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]]</ref>

As described [[Chris and racism#CADD Chef|below]], Chris had a black teacher at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] who graded him harshly on his AutoCAD work. Chris's massive victim complex again caused him to write this teacher into the comic as a villain.

{{incomplete}}

===Parental influence===
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|left|Bob telling Chris the Barack Obama joke.]]

Given that his father [[Bob Chandler]] grew up in the southern United States before the civil rights movement, it is very easy to assume that Bob harbors racist beliefs and has passed at least some of them on to Chris. It is possible Bob also disliked that Chris's high school basketball team had only one white guy and the two [[Wikipedia:waterboy|waterboys]] were both white. This line of reasoning was cemented in 2008 when Chris began referring to his father saying that, if elected president, [[Barack Obama]] would "paint the White House black."

===Niggos in the Comic===
In the [[Sonichu Comic|Sonichu Comics]] most black characters are villains who try to thwart Chris and [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|his hedgehogs]] at every turn. The ones that aren't so lucky are treated like crap by the other characters or used in race related jokes.

====[[B-Manajerk]]====
A '''villain''' based off a real life encounter. The B most likely stands for Black – the name was coined so that Chris could distinguish him from other [[Manajerks]]. This is quite similar to the way American black superheroes were named in the 1950-60s. He is a cousin of the [[Jerkhief]], because obviously dem black peoples must know each other or be related.

====[[Barack Obama]]====
A cameo for the sake of '''a race-related joke'''. [[Bob]] told Chris a racist joke about then-senator Obama, which Chris believed as being a real rumor, approved of, and then illustrated within the pages of [[Sonichu 8]]. Oh, and just in case you didn't think Chris was racist enough, he also drew Obama wearing a <strike>turban</strike> strange exotic dress and headgear, which probably was meant to imply that he is a [[Twin Falling Towers|Muslim]], just because his middle name is "Hussein". Chris later removed the joke after Obama won the election but he probably only did that <strike>so his fans wouldn't think he was unpatriotic</strike> [[Lie|because he respects Obama]] now.

[[Image:Nigrachu.jpg|thumb|And he's black and he's black.]]

====[[Black Sonichu]]/Blachu====
A '''villain''' turned positive-aligned "bad boy". Black Sonichu/Blachu (whose name was later [[retconned|changed]] to Blake) was originally a villain who later switched sides <strike>probably so that Chris would look less racist</strike> because he's a <strike>clone</strike> recolor of [[Shadow the Hedgehog]]. Note that Chris doesn't give him a creative name, like Shadow, but thinks that noting his "blackness" would be enough (see B-Manajerk). Black Sonichu's story is quite (stereo)typical. He was brought to the CWCverse against his will, and [[Reldnahc]] (a white boy) quickly states that he is Blachu's master. Black then proceeds to steal a <strike>white</strike> pink woman ([[Rosechu]]) and later a precious stone ([[Legendary Master Sunstone]]). Black Sonichu, compared to his yellow original, is considered inferior, and is all brawn and aggression while not being able to figure how to defend properly. Before his name change several characters made several ambiguous remarks when referring to him which could be interpreted as racist (including [[Wild|Wild's]] "I was following this black guy on a board..." comment). To Chris's credit, Blake becomes a positive character later, and even scores an interracial relationship with [[Bubbles Rosechu]]. Though the couple is forced to hide that fact from the intolerant society of [[CWCville]], and other characters do nothing to stop this travesty.

====[[CADD Chef]]====
A '''villain''' based on Christian's actual [[CADD|Computer Aided Drafting & Design]] teacher, Kene Meniru, at [[Piedmont Valley Community College]]. Meniru gave Chris a F in real life (probably for Chris's "[[Chris_and_English#Spelling|geinus]]" building designs) and is portrayed as a [[JERKS|jerk]] who always complains about the buildings in Cwcville. Given how bad Chris is at [[Chris and Art|drawing]] the CADD Chef's comments are perfectly understandable. Note that Chris thought it was more important that Kene Meniru was black than that he was a teacher, and decided to portray him as possibly the [[Fail|only black cartoon character he was familiar with]], even though that character had no other similarity to Mr. Meniru than the color of his skin.

==Asians==
{{main|Punchy Sonichu}}
In the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]], he portrays Punchy as a Kung-Fu master with slanty eyes. While in a mailbag, he was called out on this and retorts by denying that he's Asian.
Outside of the comic, Chris also misattributes the origin of Kung-Fu to Japan, when in actuality it came from [[China]]. He does a racist impression of a Chinese person, claims Japanese and Chinese people sound the same, and expresses dislike for the Chinese, as shown in [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]]. Later, he backpedaled and says he has no problem with the Chinese while being interrogated in [[Mumble 9]].

[[Manajerks|"Turdijerk"]] from "Off-Target" has a vaguely South Asian appearance and the name may also be based on a stereotype of an Indian accent.

In an [[IRC (17 December 2008)|IRC]], he says he has no problem with dating an Asian.

[[Image:ChingChong.jpg|thumb|right|The only known image of "Ching Chong".]]
==='''Ching Chong'''===

In the [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]], Chris present us [[Chris and remorse|sincere apologies]] for having scared a small Chinese girl that [[Ivy]] tutored in art. The child, known only as '''Ching Chong''' is now traumatized due to her witnessing a video of [[Chris]] drinking his own [[semen|"Navy"]] while innocently browsing [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. Chris never made a follow-up on the girl and never asked why her name was a known racial slur towards Ethnic Asians communities.

In the [[Wedding Comic]], Ching Chong is seen [[List of Sonichu characters#Ching Chong|as a flower girl]].
{{clear}}

==Native Americans==
{{main|Cherokian Clan}}
[[Image:02-Cheroki-Chan Card2.jpg|thumb|left| This has something to do with Native Americans, No really.]]
As stated in the main article, despite claiming to have at least one [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Cherokee ancestor]], Chris is completely ignorant of Native American culture. However, unlike other minorities, Chris's opinions and representation of native are a misguided expression of "pride" for his "heritage".

In [[Sonichu 2]]: [[Sonichu 2#Episode 7: Sonichu in "Anchuent Prophecy"|Episode 7]], Chris tries to tie in his "Cherokeeian" heritage with Sonichu lore. He depicts Cherokee characters in his work as white and wearing gold armor (Joseph Smith would be proud). The actions and spirituality of the Native Americans in his comic have almost no resemblance to any actual people that ever existed.

Chris has also embodied his his ignorance of Native American culture in a physical form. For a brief time, Chris blurred his gender roles and began to collect and customize "[[My Little Pony]]" dolls. One of the dolls he crafted was the infamous Cheroki-Chan, a Native American pony. While there is nothing overtly racist about this abomination, it is probably not how Native Americans want to be represented. In the end Cheroki-Chan is just another Mary-Sue for Chris, and pales in comparison to Chris's most infamous portrayal of Native Americans.

In a shocking display of ignorance, Chris attempted to emulate what he perceives as "Native American culture" in a [[War Paint Video]]. In this video Chris wears water washable paint (and a sports bra) and wields a gun in an attempt to frighten trolls into submission. Instead, it served to illustrate his outrageous insensitivity and callowness.

==Jews==
{{main|Christmas}}

In [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas]], Chris describes how Jews living in [[CWCville]] celebrate Hannukah. On December 12 members of the CWCville Jewish diaspora set up "Menorah candles" (the "Haunaka" Menorah candelabrum has 7 candles in it, while the traditional Menorah used on Hanukkah IRL has 9) instead of Christmas Trees, with dreidels lying under them. Since the candle-related symbolism is very much present in the RL Hanukkah rituals, it's in good taste to give CWCville Jews anything candle-related as a gift. E.g., when Sonichu's daughter Cerah Rosey baked cookies for her friends, she decided to make her Jewish friend Kevin a candle-shaped one. Because Jews surely love to be distinguished from other people on any occasions based solely on their faith, and would take deep offense in receiving a normal nothing-special-shaped cookie as a gift!

The interesting moment is that there actually is a tradition of eating specially baked foods on Hanukkah, and vanilla is one of the allowed ingredients used in making them. Not that Chris knows anything about this, mind you.

==Minority Characters in Sonichu==
*[[Florance Fisher]] (Black)
*[[Jerkhief]] (Black)
*[[Silvana]] (Black)
*[[Turdijerk]] (Unclear, drawn with dark skin)
*[[Punchy]] (East Asian)
*[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Kevin]] (Jewish)
*[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] (Intended to be Native American)

==Chris and stereotypes==
Chris's views of cultures besides southern white Christians can also be traced to the television he watches. The typical Adult Swim cartoon includes gratuitous use of stereotype-based humor. Chris takes [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|The Boondocks]]' satire of black stereotypes at face value. He also portrays nearly every person of African descent that appears in Sonichu with bald heads and either [[wikipedia:Golliwogg|round, bulging eyes]] or glasses that resemble such. Finally, he does an impression of the stereotypical black accent, which he apparently confuses with the Jamaican accent, in [[Mumble 4]].

His exposure to anime fuels his misguided views on East Asians. Asians, in his views, [[Excel Saga|excel at]] [[Random-access humor]] and [[Punchy|martial arts]].

Chris, despite claiming Cherokee ancestry, doesn't seem to know what a Native American even looks like, as he portrays the [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] as an overtly European person wearing Greco-Roman garb. He also tramples all over their actual rituals and culture simply to implement the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] into his comic.

==Not a Racist?==
[[Image:ECP_00024.jpg|150px|thumb|Chris is a '''wiggo'''.]]

Chris does not want to be considered a racist. He claims to respect blacks as equals, saying that in CWCville [[Fail|"they can even vote"]], but at best he merely tolerates their existence so long as they stay away from him. Or if they can [[Reggie Fils-Aimé|help him get his inane and idiotic video game made]]. However, he does genuinely like two black people: [[My big 18th party (story)|Kenan & Kel]].

Also, Chris has probably never been told that the voice of [[Sonic]] in the animated series that he loves so much was Jaleel White (AKA Steve Urkel), a black man. If someone told him this, he would probably deny it. However, given that Chris managed to get [[LittleBigPlanet|respect]] for [[Homos|Stephen Fry]]..

He did mention more than once that the reason he doesn't want black girls (but any other race is okay) is because he thinks God told him that his future daughter Crystal must be white, too.

Realistically, Chris is not considered a white supremacist type of racist but more of a xenophobic one. In other words, he's afraid of ethnic groups he's not familiar with. Like most things in his life, [[Chris and reality|Chris has no real knowledge and bases everything off of what he's seen on TV]]. Chris' perception of minorities is only what the TV shows him, since encountering them in real life is something that rarely occurs.

===Improved race relations?===
[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|Chris does not judge a woman by the color of her skin but by the size of her tits.]]

An image leaked on 26 [[September 2009]] showing Chris having sex with three young ladies, including an African American woman. In the [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|Captain's Log of 10 October 2009]], Chris clarified that the woman with whom he's performing sexual intercourse is "Half And Half" (mixed ancestry). This proves to us that, even if he's ready to touch the [[china|genitals]] of a black woman, he is unable to imagine the sexual intercourse with someone not sharing white ancestry. In fact, there's evidence that [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(sister)|shared ancestry may be a turn-on for Chris.]]

It seems that the futility of his [[love quest]] has lead Chris to lower his ridiculously high standards even further, as he did with fat chicks (which he dropped for [[Sarah Jackson]]), and red heads (as he did with [[Ivy]]).

==References==
<references/>
{{Chris and}}
[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Talk:14 January 2010

2010-01-14T22:13:23Z

Orly444: Created page with '"I am still a good individual human being." AH HA HA, OH WOW. This should be Quote of the Day, I think. ~~~~'

"I am still a good individual human being."
AH HA HA, OH WOW. This should be Quote of the Day, I think. [[User:Orly444|Orly444]] 22:13, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Stress

2010-01-11T03:50:41Z

Orly444: Created page with '==Crashing into Slumber== Is this another CWCism? ~~~~'

==Crashing into Slumber==

Is this another CWCism? [[User:Orly444|Orly444]] 03:50, 11 January 2010 (UTC)