CWCki - User contributions [en]

User talk:Pugs Malone

2013-02-03T16:46:34Z

Pugs Malone:

== Nominating things for deletion ==

If you want to nominate something for deletion, you just add <nowiki>{{delete}}</nowiki> to the page. You said you didn't know how, so there you go. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 20:45, 10 November 2009 (CET)

Thanks! [[User:Pugs Malone|Pugs Malone]] 22:31, 10 November 2009 (CET)

No problem! --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 22:52, 10 November 2009 (CET)

Rocky Shoemaker

2010-11-07T22:38:38Z

Pugs Malone:

[[Image:shoemaker.jpg|thumb|Rocky Shoemaker]]

[[Image:ivyjesus.jpg|thumb|''[[Ivy]] vs. The Methodist Church''. Coming to a theater near you]]

'''Rochelle "Rocky" Shoemaker''' is a pastoral counselor (actual title - "Assistant Pastor for Care Ministries") at the [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]], who advised [[Chris]] on several matters, going as far back as the [[Miyamoto Saga]].

==Biography==

Rocky used to work in the [http://www.cof-umc.org/index.html Community of Faith United Methodist Church], where she garnered high praise and [http://cof-umc.org/blog/?p=3 comparisons with Rocky Balboa]. In the year of Our Lord [[2009]], she brought about the end of the [[Ivy]] Saga, by pushing Chris to go to the police about Ivy.

This wasn't the first time she wanted to call the cops, either - [[Julie]] and [[PandaHalo]] have both incurred her wrath in the past.

The last straw came in the form of [[Joshua Martinez]], aka [[Vanessa Hudgens]], who tried to swindle some money out of Chris by trading him a [[PSP]]. After that, Shoemaker made [[Bob Chandler]] and [[Barb]] contact the cops who tried to find Ivy and even managed to get a background check on her and came up with nothing.

In a [[IRC (23 July 2009)|July 2009 IRC Chat]] Chris, believing that he had entered the chat incognito (although the trolls had in fact instantly seen through his false identity), suggested that the trolls force him to [[Chris and sex|rape]] Rocky. That's right. Despite the fact that she just might be the only person left with any hope for Chris, he still has fantasies about raping her and then blaming the trolls for making him do it. Rocky herself is aware that Chris said this. The fact that she did not kick him out of the church on the spot speaks volumes about her sanity.

In addition to her interaction with Chris, Rocky has an adult son who works at RockStar Games, makers of Grand Theft Auto.

==The ultimate white knight?==
Rocky Shoemaker might be the only person in the world who is genuinely concerned about Christian's well-being. Judging by her approval of the [[Love Quest]], it can be inferred that she supports Christian's desire for [[china]].

Despite saving him from the wiles of Joshua Martinez and [[Clyde Cash]], it seems as though Rocky is ineffective at making an impact in Christian's life where it really matters - namely his [[Homos|bigotry]], [[Chris and his Ego|selfishness]], [[Chris and death|total disregard for others]], [[Chris and health|gluttony]], and [[Chris and anger|rage]].

One can usually spot her hand in affairs if Chris begins to display common sense. It is generally believed that she was behind Chris's attempt to quit the internet forever on 21 March 2010, as the video was made on a Sunday. Chris likely meets with her on Thursdays and Sundays, as he suddenly developed basic pattern recognition skills long enough to catch one troll on 29 April and smoke out [[Sydney Contacts|another]] on 1 May (though he may have simply gotten both mixed up with [[Jackie]]).

Chris insists that Rocky is a better counselor than a professional psychologist, and seems to accept uncritically whatever she says, even though her only qualifications are "big fan of [[GodJesus|Jesus]]."

==See also==
*[[Chris and religion]]
*[[Chris and sex]]
{{DEFAULTSORT:Shoemaker, Rocky}}
[[Category:People]]

CWCville

2010-11-07T17:51:21Z

Pugs Malone: /* Name */

[[File:Damntrolls.png|center|450px]]

{{quote|I'm still the mayor of CWCville. There [[Chris and English|is]] [[Wikipedia:North Korea|no elections]].|[[Chris-chan Discusses...]]}}

<center>{{#ev:youtube|8UP6mEJrj1I}}</center>

'''CWCville''' (pronounced: [kwɪkvɪɫ], "quick-ville") is [[Chris]]'s imaginary world, created from a combination of his twisted views on the world and pop-culture to work as a place where all his wishes, ideas, and deranged fantasies become true.

{| class="wikitable collapsible collapsed" align="right" border="1"
! CWCville
|-
|'''Flag''' (Ceremonial)
|[[File:Cwcflag1.png|200px|The ceremonial flag of CWCville.]]
|-
|'''Flag''' (National)
|[[File:Newflag1.png|The national flag of CWCville.]]
|-
| '''Location'''
| [[Virginia]], [[USA]]
|-
| '''Coordinates'''
| Unknown, possibly the same as [[Charlottesville]] in a parallel universe, far from [[Molvanîa]]
|-
| '''Date established'''
| ''Fictional'': [[Sonichu chronology#1982|1982]] ''Real world:'' [[2000]]
|-
| '''Population'''
| Unknown. Mixed population of humans, Pokémon, and ripoffs
|-
|'''Political Ideology'''
| Chandlerian Socialism
|-
| '''ZIP code'''
| 02024<ref>[[Sonichu 8 Official Videobook]]</ref>
|-
| '''Website'''
| None (formerly ''The CWCipedia'')
|-
| '''Also known as'''
| Chris's mind, CWCistan, The People's Democratic Republic of CWCville, The Confederate States of CWCville, Hell, etc.
|-
| '''Exports'''
| Excessive undeveloped characters, blatant ripoffs, autistic manchildren, oppressed [[Homos|LGBT]] refugees, semen
|-
| '''Current relevance'''
| Main location of events in the ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' universe
|}

==Overview==
[[Image:CWCvilleMapProper.jpg|thumb|200px|Sonichu and Rosechu's welfare housing in relation to the rest of CWCville (note their postal code is the same as Chris's birthday and its address is nearly identical to his real address)]]
[[File:cwcville1.jpg|thumb|200px|A slightly more detailed (but no less disproportionate) drawing of CWCville]]

CWCville is the setting of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', a city in Virginia of which Chris is Mayor for life. CWCville is where Chris portrays friends and enemies from his real life in scenarios altered to reflect his bias toward himself. As his ideal metropolitan community, CWCville illustrates Chris's poor understanding of how a city actually functions. Like everything else that appears in his comic, Chris believes CWCville to actually exist in a parallel universe.<ref>[[Chris and reality#Fantasy and fiction]]</ref> Chris has claimed to be mayor of CWCville "IN REAL LIFE."<ref>[[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#THAT DOES NOT MATTER (CCS)]]</ref> As an entity Chris believes to be real, CWCville is a coping mechanism used to compensate for his unsatisfying actual life.

It has been argued that the unconquerable quality of Chris's [[ego]] stems from the fact that he can retreat to his own CWCville world, where he can right all wrongs done to him. In his comics, we see him defeating [[Mary Lee Walsh]], with whom he holds an IRL grudge, beating around the jerkops, and bringing his dead dog, [[Patti Chandler]], back to life in the form of the anthropomorphic [[Patti-Chan]] The main reason Chris can do such superhuman acts as defeating a whole army of huge [[Jerkops]] and resurrecting his dead dog is that in CWCville his will is supreme. This serves as a blanket that protects his physically and mentally weak self from the outside world in which he holds no such power.

Chris is greatly concerned by people who are misinformed about any detail of CWCville or conclude that it is anything but "a clean, secure, orderly and safe city."<ref>[[Mailbag 35#Except when half of it gets destroyed by giant robots]]</ref> After being coerced into declaring [[BILLY MAYS]] the new Mayor of CWCville,<ref>[[March 2009]]</ref> Chris repeatedly stated that this was not true.<ref>[[Mumble 11]]</ref><ref>[[CWC Update 1 July 2009]]</ref><ref name=p32/> In his willingness to educate, and his confusion at negative reactions to his answers, Chris seems to think that anyone who understands what CWCville is like will love it.

[[Image:0823-EP12-5P6-3.jpg|thumb|left|The toys that started it all]]

The seeds of CWCville were planted early into Chris's life. At some point, Chris put all of his completed [[LEGO]] kits, original LEGO creations, and various handmade Sonichu items together on one table in his room. The first official CWCville media was made in 2001.<ref>[[The City of Cwicville Tour!]]</ref> After toying with more phonetic spellings, Chris settled on "CWCville"<ref>[[Animal Crossing Documentary]]</ref> in 2003. This spelling consecutively features the initials of his full name and its pronunciation must be explained to others, indicative of CWCville's nature as a self-serving and insular fantasy.

Chris has repeatedly associated CWCville with Charlottesville, VA, likely the largest and most familiar urban environment in his life. Chris has presented footage of Charlottesville as footage of CWCville.<ref>[[Rollin' and Trollin']]</ref> He has stated that CWCville is as important and worthy of respect as every American city that begins with "C", but mentioned only Charlottesville by name, calling it "the most important one" of these "C-Villes", as if Chicago, for example, was less important than Charlottesville.<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref> CWCville is said to have an annual Dogwood Festival,<ref name=p32>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_9/Page_32 Issue 9/Page 32]</ref> also an annual Charlottesville tradition. This association further illustrates Chris's narrow perception of the outside world.

However, a map in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]] shows CWCville as being near Pallet Town and Giovanni's Gym in Viridian City, featured in the [[Pokémon]] series and located in Kanto, an area based on the [[Wikipedia:Kantō region|Kantō region]] in Japan. It is also located near [[Wikipedia:Sonic Adventure#Gameplay|Station Square]], found on Mobius.

Given Chris's humongous ego, it's surprising that didn't he give himself a whole country to begin with, or better yet, a whole fucking planet. He later created the land of [[RuleCWC]], an idiotic Hyrule ripoff, but he actually let someone else rule it.
{{clear}}

==Name==

One of Chris's [[The Wall of Originals|homemade Pokémon cards]] featured a "'''Cwick City''' Gym," while [[City of Cwicville Tour!|an unfinished Game Boy Camera project]] dating from [[2001]] used the spellings "'''Cwicville'''" and "'''Cwickville'''". A sign on the door to his room reads "Christian W. Chandler's Cwickville City Gym." It is unknown why he changed the spelling. Likely the alternate spelling just didn't stimulate [[Chris and his ego|his massive ego]] as much as his unaltered initials, even if it makes a lot less sense. (Although Christown, Chandlerville etc. would have been just as good and made a lot more sense.)

Without knowing the "correct" pronunciation of the name, the fact remains that "CWCville", unlike any proper English word, begins with four consonants in a row. Using conventional phonology, the name is pretty difficult to utter, unless you're Welsh, in which case it would be pronounced "cookville". In [[Mailbag 43#...well, this is disturbing!|Mailbag 43]], Chris slams [[Evan]] and fails once again, spectacularly, to realize the seeds of truth buried in parodies.

==Government and politics==
{{Quote|And for your information, my City's politics are of a King/Queen thing; NO VOTING|Chris, explaining the totalitarian state to [[Samantha Thaddeus E-mails|Samantha Thaddeus]].}}

{{Quote|Chris-chan was the Mayor of CWCville. Chris-chan had always been the Mayor of CWCville.|Paraphrased from [[CWC Update 1 July 2009]]}}

[[Image:CWCvilleArea.jpg|thumb|Map of CWCville area. Notice how [[Sonic]]'s house is bigger than the entirety of Pallet Town. Also, if you look at Station Square, you'll notice Chris's obsession with the [[Twin Falling Towers|World Trade Center]]. Note how Chris needs an [[Ego|arrow pointing to himself]].]]
[[Image:Chris Jong-Il.jpg|thumb|Artist's depiction of CWCville's beloved [[Chris|Mayor.]]]]
[[Image:CWCville.jpg|thumb|This is what a typical city looks like after being nuked. (Note the "SS" runes.)]]
[[File:GrandWizards4Sonichu.jpg|thumb|Chris and his men wielding the CWCville ceremonial flag while on parade in Town Square.]]

According to [[Sonichu 8]], CWCville was founded in [[1982]] by Chris's father, [[Bob Chandler]]. Why he would name a city after his deadshit son is unknown. And only [[GodJesus]] knows why it wasn't called RFCville.

According to the [[Samantha Thaddeus]] e-mails, the government is a "King/Queen thing" with no elections. There's a non-elected leader who does what he pleases, "advised" by an elected House of Representatives which sits at the Cwcville Trade Center Building. Exactly how CWCville's government operates is unknown. Chandler is Mayor-for-life with supreme power, and has insisted that there are no elections, but he has also insisted that the vote has "even" been extended to [[Niggos|those of African descent]], but [[Women's rights|apparently not to women]], as some women are seen [[Sonichu 8#Episode_17:_Epilogue|protesting]] in order to gain suffrage in CWCville. Voting is strictly for the Town Council (or "Board of Director Members"<ref>[[Mailbag 37]]</ref>), which holds no authority, existing as a purely advisory committee which the Mayor is not obligated to listen to. The Mayor attempts to dissuade accusations of dictatorship, citing that dictatorships are never hereditary, whereas he [[Mailbag 34#The government totally sucks|inherited the town from his father]] (even though many dictatorships ''are'' hereditary, e.g. Kim Jong-il succeeded his father Kim Il-sung, and "Baby Doc" succeeded "Papa Doc" in Haiti). However, he refuses to acknowledge that this obviously makes his town a ''monarchy'', by explaining that all other government positions are voted on (even though such a practice is found in many modern monarchies, even absolute ones). It's also revealed that the name of the town was changed when it was passed from father to son, though whether or not the town was originally known as "RFCville", or something marginally less retarded is unknown, as all records of Mayor Bob's mayorship — in fact, all symbols of the old regime — have been erased (like the Roman practice of ''[[Wikipedia:damnatio memoriae|damnatio memoriae]]'', where all records of a traitor: statues, etc., are erased after his death). It is theorized that one day Christian will hand over the reins of governance to his daughter, [[Crystal]] Weston Chandler, in which case the town's name will not go through another change.

On 3 [[March 2009]], Chris announced that BILLY MAYS was the new Mayor of CWCville and that he was going to CWCville Jail to get raped by [[niggos]]. The next day, Chris revoked his edict that made MAYS the new Mayor, establishing a government-in-exile in his bedroom. Most legal scholars, however, argue that since Chris was not wearing the [[Medallion of Fail]], which Chris has indicated is necessary for a video to be TRUE and HONEST (and any retraction otherwise would involve him wearing the medallion to make his retraction legally binding), his statements to the contrary are false and therefore not legally binding, meaning BILLY MAYS is still the Mayor of CWCville. On 28 [[June 2009]], BILLY MAYS died in his mayoral mansion, allegedly due to a cocaine overdose, but the hand of Chandler was suspected. The city was plunged into mourning. Chris wasted no time in seizing control of CWCville, announcing during a [[Chris_chan_Discusses|post-coup interview]] that [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doublethink he was always the ruler], and that there would be no further elections.

The police don't take orders from the civil authorities and lock people up at random, [[Mary Lee Walsh|the dean]] of [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|the only college]] is leading a hopeless resistance and is vilified in the [[Comic|mayoral-controlled press]]. [[Attraction Sign|Soliciting sex]] is legal in CWCville, whereas possession of [[tobacky|tobacco]] is a very serious offense. [[Alcohol]] was illegal until 2009, when the ban was [[Chris's Big Night Out|rescinded]].

Laws have been enacted to persecute homosexuals, and [[Mailbag 31|psychic surveillance is used to monitor sexual purity]]; in a predictable display of bureaucratic cluelessness, this important task has been somehow handed to [[Magi-Chan|an obvious closet case]]. This constant Orwellian surveillance, which is obviously done under the guise of "protecting" the citizens, flies completely against the basic human right to privacy. Since there is no plausible way to have any oversight over a super-powered official or question or contest his findings (and [[Mailbag|disputing the authority has been futile in general]]), it also effectively elevates the official above law. The Mayor has also hinted — though sensibly, he has not written it into actual ''law'', otherwise all international observers would condemn his actions at once — that the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, a group of civilian defense contractors, have [[Chris and the Law#In the Comics|immunity from prosecution]]. This goes against the concept of supremacy of law that is the very foundation of modern societies; some sociologists have pointed out that this is in fact the hallmark of all police states.

CWCville has a [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|large police force equipped with weapons and TANKS, and even an entire division of the U.S. Army]]; all these units, as said before, are above law. These groups appear frequently all around the city enforcing the laws, giving grim reminders of their existence to the common public every day, dragging the morale down. Any attempts at humor are prosecuted swiftly and severely under the draconian laws that are based on [[Chris and copyright|curious misinterpretations]] of international copyright laws. Dissident comedians who flee the city are hunted down and gruesomely executed (with the emphasis on "cute") by [[Sandy Rosechu|underage assassins]]. Despite all this perceived military and law enforcement might, the police and mercenaries demonstrably offer little real protection or competence: troublemakers like [[Wes Iseli]] ruin weddings with near impunity, and the [[Mary Lee Walsh|dissident leaders]] remain at large [[Sonichu 10|until recently]].

The court system is a joke. Walsh was captured, depowered and sent to a maximum security prison without a trial. The [[jerkops]] and [[manajerks]] are depowered, yet were supposedly allowed to go scot-free. However, when [[Simonla Rosechu]] is murdered by a Voltorb, four people - [[Evan]], [[Alec Benson Leary]], Sean and Mao are arrested and put on trial not even a week after, despite earlier receiving a public pardon from the Mayor. The judge is biased in Chris's favor, when all judges should be impartial. Sean is permitted to defend himself and his fellow co-defendants, despite being clearly under the influence of drugs. Nobody suggests appointing a public defender for the four. The prosecutor adds on to the charges, considering slander via the Asperpedia (which was destroyed by Chris) punishable by death, when it is a mild offense in most jurisdictions. Evidence gathered using Magi-Chan's psychic powers is considered admissible in court. When the four are found guilty by a clearly biased jury, they are immediately executed in ''[[Chris|cruel and inhumane ways]]''.

The basic services are lacking: Packs of wild Pokémon roam the streets, uncontrolled. The Mayor wastes precious [[Monthly tugboat|taxpayer money]] on [[Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail|oversize novelty drinking straws]] and [[Patti-chan|credit cards for dogs]]. As of [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Christmas 2009]], there were 10 homeless shelters set up: [[Mailbag 20|Chris himself]] claims that these ten-story "soup hotels" house an population of 900-1,800 indigents, and come equipped with free cable TV. The Mayor's personal friends, such as [[Sonichu]], live in state-sponsored, suburban housing. He also supplied furniture for [[Wild Sonichu]].<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 21</ref>

'''tl;dr''' CWCville is a banana republic that makes most African countries look like the world's best places to live.
{{clear}}

==Economy==
[[File:Cwccash.jpg|thumb|CWCville currency]]
CWCville runs under a command economy which Chris has near-total control over: the [[KCWC|radio station]] and [[CWC Cola|soft drink company]] are named after the Mayor, which indicates either nationalization of normally private businesses or rampant cronyism. The banning of goods that the Mayor disapproves of has also contributed to the city's financial troubles. [[Tobacco]], unhealthy as it may be, is illegal to sell, possess or consume, despite the multibillion dollar value of the industry. With the banning of anything tobacco-related, CWCville loses hundreds of millions of dollars a year in tax revenues, jobs and investment.

CWCville also mints its own currency, which comes in confusing denominations - there are two coins: the C-Quarter and W-Quarter, ten C-Quarters equaling one W-Quarter, indicating that [[Honor roll|Chris has no idea what "quarter" means]]. The W-Quarter is round and golden in color, with a silver-colored rim and the letter "W" in red in the center, while the C-Quarter is C-shaped and blue, with a silver-colored rim. Fines are levied in U.S. dollars, for unknown reasons: perhaps to add to the foreign currency reserves of the tottering dictatorship.

Doubtless CWCville's disastrous economic policy has led the establishment of a flourishing black market, perhaps using [[tobacky]] or [[pickles]] as currency.

==Flora and fauna==
[[Image:zapbud.jpg|thumb|Zapbud]]
CWCville, like the rest of Virginia, has a temperate climate and is suitable for large-scale agriculture. Years of economic decline, however, have seen CWCville's environs diverge greatly from those of its neighboring cities. Its forests growing thicker, and its fields returning to nature, CWCville is an excellent laboratory for the avid naturalist. Pokémon roam in the forests; zapbuds fill the fields.

Zapbuds have quickly established themselves in the surrounding ecosystem. Aside from [[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu|"healing woes,"]] relatively little is known about them. They have four petals, possibly resembling buds of some sort in their normal state, and the "zap" in their name and electrical hazard symbols on their petals suggest that it might not be the brightest idea to pee in the middle of a zapbud field.

Marijuana is grown in CWCville and is used recreationally [[Inos|by]] [[Yawning Squirtle|several]] [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace|people]] but is punished by [[Book10Replacement|Draconian prison sentences]]. {{clear}}

==See also==
* [[CWCville Shopping Center]]
* [[CWCville Mayoral Office]]

==Sauces==
<references/>

==External links==
* [http://www.onetruecwcville.net/index.php onetruecwcville.net]
* [http://www.freewebs.com/cwcvillechronicles/ CWCVille Chronicles]
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ao1CIn7qkaY CWCville Mayor Campaign 2010]
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iyevn2-MU7I CWCville's National Anthem]

{{CWCverse}}
[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Places]]
[[Category:Sonichu]]

Carlos Chantor

2010-11-07T15:50:58Z

Pugs Malone:

[[File:Chantor.jpg|thumb|right|250px|"Experienced for Her Pleasure."]]
{{quote|Before you contacted me again to renew our relationship, I was aiming towards selling myself out as a Male Escort to earn money. I tried applying with C-Ville's "Naughty & Nice" Escort Service; they did not take me. And I printed and discreetly passed out cards, along with posting an ad on escorts.com, under the new alias of '''"Carlos Chantor"''''(DO NOT Tell anyone else of my new alias).|Chris, [[Jackie E-mails 6]].}}
'''Carlos Chantor''' was Chris's alias during his short career as a male escort.

Chris came up with the alias after his first break up with his sweetheart [[Jackie]]. He tried joining with [[Charlottesville]]'s "Naughty and Nice" escort services, but after being told that there was no market for [[duck|bent]], [[autism|autistic]] [[virgin with rage|virgins with rage]], he made a profile at '''Escorts.com'''. He also distributed cards promoting himself as an escort around Charlottesville.

Shockingly, no one called Chris up.

== Escorts.com profile ==

=== About Me ===

Experienced for Her Pleasure.

Hey, Ladies. I am a cool dude to hang with, and I can make you feel good emotionally and [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|show you a fun time]]. I enjoy a lot of things; I'll let you know when it's going too far. Give me a call to hook up (434 area code only).

=== My Details ===

*'''Sex''': Male
*'''Date of Birth''': 2/24/[[1982]] (age 28)
*'''Orientation''': [[Homos|Straight]] Male
*'''Ethnicity''': [[Chris and race|Caucasian]]
*'''Body Type:''' [[Obesity|Average (height/weight proportional)]]
*'''Height''': 5 feet 10 inches (178 cm)
*'''Hair Color''': Brown
*'''Eye Color''': [[Heterochromia|Blue]]
*'''[[Tobacky|Smoking]]''': Do Not Smoke
*'''Drinking''': [[Alcohol|Occasionally]]
*'''Drug Use''': Never use them
*'''Language Spoken''': [[Chris and English|English]]
*'''Secondary Language''': [[Spanish]]

{{stub}}

Carlos Chantor

2010-11-07T15:49:18Z

Pugs Malone:

[[File:Chantor.jpg|thumb|right|250px|"Experienced for Her Pleasure."]]
{{quote|Before you contacted me again to renew our relationship, I was aiming towards selling myself out as a Male Escort to earn money. I tried applying with C-Ville's "Naughty & Nice" Escort Service; they did not take me. And I printed and discreetly passed out cards, along with posting an ad on escorts.com, under the new alias of '''"Carlos Chantor"''''(DO NOT Tell anyone else of my new alias).|Chris, [[Jackie E-mails 6]].}}
'''Carlos Chantor''' was Chris's alias during his short career as a male escort.

Chris came up with the alias after his first break up with his sweetheart [[Jackie]]. He tried joining with [[Charlottesville]]'s "Naughty and Nice" escort services, but after being told that there was no market for [[duck|bent]], [[autism|autistic]] [[virgin with rage|virgins with rage]], he made a profile at '''Escorts.com'''. He also distributed cards with the link to his profile by hand around Charlottesville.

Shockingly, no one called Chris up.

== Escorts.com profile ==

=== About Me ===

Experienced for Her Pleasure.

Hey, Ladies. I am a cool dude to hang with, and I can make you feel good emotionally and [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|show you a fun time]]. I enjoy a lot of things; I'll let you know when it's going too far. Give me a call to hook up (434 area code only).

=== My Details ===

*'''Sex''': Male
*'''Date of Birth''': 2/24/[[1982]] (age 28)
*'''Orientation''': [[Homos|Straight]] Male
*'''Ethnicity''': [[Chris and race|Caucasian]]
*'''Body Type:''' [[Obesity|Average (height/weight proportional)]]
*'''Height''': 5 feet 10 inches (178 cm)
*'''Hair Color''': Brown
*'''Eye Color''': [[Heterochromia|Blue]]
*'''[[Tobacky|Smoking]]''': Do Not Smoke
*'''Drinking''': [[Alcohol|Occasionally]]
*'''Drug Use''': Never use them
*'''Language Spoken''': [[Chris and English|English]]
*'''Secondary Language''': [[Spanish]]

{{stub}}

Wendy's

2010-11-06T18:55:38Z

Pugs Malone: /* Chris the employee */

[[Image:Wendy's logo.png|120px|center]]
[[Image:Chris Wendy's.jpg|thumb|250px|The branch of Wendy's at which Chris worked.]]

'''Wendy's''' (or "'''Wendys'''", according to [[Chris]]) is an American fast food chain that employed Chris briefly until he got fired. Chris's job primarily consisted of custodial duties instead of preparing food. Chris has contradicted himself about when he worked there; he claimed in his [[Chris's resume|resume]] that he worked there from August to October [[2001]], but he told [[Father Call|Kacey's father]] that he had already been fired before September 11, 2001. All told, Chris likely worked at Wendy's for a month and a half, working about 20-30 hours a week at what was likely a minimum wage pay.

==Chris the employee==
Chris's own accounts of his employment paint him as a stubborn and difficult employee. In 2009, Chris was asked about his time at Wendy's several times after the date with [[Emily]]. Chris believed his supervisor didn't think very highly of him for reasons upon which we can only speculate. He mentioned a time involving him getting his uniform dirty and simply continuing to wear it, not taking into account the [[Chris and health#Hygiene|usual sanitation standards]] of most fast food restaurants and also not realizing he could get another, clean shirt from the supply room.

In a conversation with [[Father Call|Kacey's father]], Chris mentioned "emotional differences" as the reason for his termination, and claimed that the manager had a "spike on his shoulder" against him. At this time it is unknown what these differences were, although they were almost certainly minor differences of opinion over punctuality and performing the job duties for which he was hired.

In [[Jackie Chat 4]], Chris also cited vague conflict between him and a female co-worker.

==Dismissal==
The circumstances of Chris's firing have never been revealed, as Chris has never given a clear or concise answer on the cause of his dismissal from Wendy's. It's been alleged the last straw was when Chris scared a small child in the restaurant. Unconfirmed stories claim this took place when he tried to cut open a [[Wikipedia:baked potato|baked potato]] for the kid. Other stories say Chris scared the same small kid while doing his [[Donald Duck impersonation]]. In [[Mumble]],{{cite}} Chris has claimed it was because he was trying to get napkins for the child. On his date from 19 [[March 2009]], when asked if his Donald Duck impersonation had scared the child (it sounds like something out of ''The Exorcist''), he said that the child was "tired" at the time.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]] "No, not really scary, you see he was tired..."</ref> <ref>[[Mumble 7]] "But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired."</ref>

The most likely explanation for what happened at Wendy's is that Chris made many small but frequent mistakes and likely aggravated coworkers, managers and customers with his attitude. His supervisor likely became tired of the difficulty in dealing with Chris's inappropriate behavior, and he used the child incident (whatever it was) to finally fire Chris. Oddly, Chris wasn't notified in advance of his firing and came to work only to be told by his former co-workers that he wasn't supposed to be there.

At Wendy's, Chris received the only money he has ever actually earned in his life — a sum likely consisting of about $500, or 19 days' [[tugboat]].

==See also==
* [[Cutco]] - Chris's only other employer.
* [[Chris's resume]]

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
* [http://maps.google.co.uk/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&q=&vps=9&jsv=151e&sll=38.231303,-78.37095&sspn=0.005158,0.019312&ie=UTF8&geocode=FYRbRwIdkChU-w&split=0 Google Maps Location]

{{Places}}

[[Category:Places]]
[[Category:Jobs]]

Chris and religion

2010-10-21T17:10:51Z

Pugs Malone: /* Chris and other faiths */

{{quote|When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.|1st Corinthians 13:11, on what Chris <s>has failed to</s> will never do.}}

{{quote|And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; Being filled with all unrighteousness, [[Julie|fornication]], [[Twin Falling Towers|wickedness]], [[Kacey|covetousness]], [[Don't_Mess_With_Me|maliciousness]]; full of [[Infinitely_high_boyfriend_factor|envy]], [[Death threats|murder]], [[Mass debating|debate]], [[Lies|deceit]], [[Chris and anger|malignity]]; whisperers, backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, [[Chris and his ego|proud]], [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|boasters]], inventors of [[Sonichu|evil things]], [[Bob Chandler|disobedient to parents]], [[Naive|without understanding]], covenantbreakers, [[Hanky-panky|without natural affection]], [[Chris and remorse|implacable]], [[Sonichu_Special_4|unmerciful]]: who knowing the judgment of God, that they which [[For_Julie's_Eyes_Only|commit such things are worthy of death]], not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.|Romans 1:28-32, on Chris}}

{{quote|my CURRENT church can help me a LOT better than any "professional"|Chris being a Xenufag, to [[Vivian Gee|Vivitheg]]}}
[[Image:CHRISjesuss.jpg|thumb|right||Program from Chris's baptism]]
'''The religion of [[Christian Weston Chandler]]''' is a complicated topic because his stated religious convictions often differ from his actual, peculiar beliefs about God, sinfulness, and the nature of good and evil.

That Chris professes a belief in Christianity completes the general stereotype of the naive hillbilly idiot who thinks that citing divine authority is the way to win arguments about things he doesn't understand. With religion, like anything else, Chris only hears what he wants to hear. For example, he accepts his religion's teachings condemning [[homos]]exuality ''and'' ignores the fact that it also forbids pre-marital sex, hatred, intolerance, [[Nudes|pornography]] and [[Mass debating|masturbation]]. This dissonance is exemplified in his reaction to the news that [[PandaHalo]] had been raped and impregnated by [[Clyde Cash]]: He actively encouraged her to spend time with her rapist because a child should know and be raised by both of its parents... shortly after encouraging her to get an abortion.

Chris's narrow view of the world requires that [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] share his religious beliefs, despite the fact that they also regard Chris as their almighty creator and father.

Regardless of his religion, Chris believes he has received [[Dreams|multiple visions from God]].

==Denomination==
[[Image:SonichuRosechuReligious.jpg|thumb|right|Sonichu and Rosechu recall Joseph's story of "forgiveness" prior to Rosechu brutally faceraping [[Jason Kendrick Howell]].]]
At some time in his youth, Chris was baptized in an unspecified [[Wikipedia:Methodism|Methodist]] church.<ref>[[IRC_(28_December_2008)]]</ref> The first church he and his parents are known to have attended is [[Grace Baptist Church]], a small congregation in [[Charlottesville]] that launched in 2000.<ref>http://cvilletomorrow.typepad.com/charlottesville_tomorrow_/2007/12/grace_baptist.html</ref> In 2008 he was, under [[Nudes|mysterious circumstances]], forced to leave that community, at which time he began attending [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]].

"Wesley Mem" is located near the [[University of Virginia]] and has an unusually liberal theology; the common conclusion among [[trolls]] is that congregations more in line with Chris's opinions of [[homos]] are equally intolerant of him, so he had to come here. The doctrinal differences between the [[Wikipedia:Southern Baptist|Southern Baptist]] and Methodist denominations are probably too subtle for Chris to concern himself with, and he likely does not identify with any particular denomination of Christianity beyond simply being Protestant.

Chris has no connection to Catholicism, which he seems to regard as a benign but alien practice. In his comics, he assigns it to a minor character, [[Angelica Rosechu]], whose faith doesn't practically differentiate her from the rest of the inhabitants of CWCville - she's still as much of a slut as the rest of the Rosechus. (Not to mention, her home congregation is called "Samuel Memorial United Christian Church," which is about the least likely name for a Roman Catholic church Chris could have come up with; most Catholic churches are called after a saint, or a divine epithet such as "Sacred Heart", "Holy Name", "Blessed Virgin", etc.)

[[PandaHalo]]'s persona was designed to be devoutly Roman Catholic specifically to confound Chris's desire for pre-marital sex with contraception. Faced with this challenge, Chris tried to argue that God really does allows pre-marital sex because his pastor said so. Members of the same religion often differ on the finer points of God's will because ultimately there is no objective point of reference to settle the dispute. Chris cannot comprehend this because to him his beliefs ''are'' that point of reference; [[Autism|you either share his beliefs or you're receiving bad information]].

==Concept of God (or: GodJesus)==
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|right|THIS IS WHAT CHRIS ACTUALLY BELIEVES]]
[[Image:CWCletter.jpg|thumb|left|Chris invokes God and Jesus, saying they told him that [[Blanca]] is real. Proof that God and Jesus are on the [[trolls|trolls']] side.]]
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|right|God and Jesus tell Chris he is meant to be with Ivy who is [[lie|totally not a troll]].]]
[[Image:Issue 0A Page 8 edit.JPG|thumb|left|Radar sums it up nicely]]

Chris has a fundamental belief in an omnipotent, benevolent God; beyond this, he also accepts Jesus Christ as the son of God and the savior of mankind. He's reluctant to mention God without also including Jesus, perhaps out of some sense that he must stress his specifically Christian notion of God. In effect, Chris frequently refers to "God and Jesus" (or "GodJesus"<ref>[[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]</ref><ref>[[CWC_Update_9_April_2009]]</ref>) as if they were some sort of two-headed creature, unlike the Christian concept of the Holy Trinity, which states that God himself exists as three "persons" or expressions. This would technically make him closer to a [[Wikipedia:Unitarian|Unitarian]] than a Methodist.

Being the unparalleled study in egotism he is, Chris seems to view God as a more of a metaphor for his own will than a supreme being to whom he is subject. To Chris, God will overlook (or doesn't care about) his misdeeds, but will become as enraged as Chris over those of others, especially when they are against him. Case in point, the ''fact'' that Chris cheated in the [[PaRappa the Rapper contest]] is not nearly as important as the ''suspicion'' that [[Adam Stackhouse]] did.

Chris believes God has a special interest in his own life, which would be consistent with Western monotheism, except that he also thinks God has nothing better to do than attend to him, and him alone. In his worldview, God's primary purpose is to arrange events so that he is happy, and punish those who make him unhappy. He is commonly observed saying things like "with God (and Jesus) on my side I will... [insert anything Chris [[fail|fails]] at]." He often invokes the wrath of God in his [[Death threats|infantile threats]], and is oblivious to the fact that God has yet to back him up on any of them.

Chris attributes most of his motivations to commands given to him directly from GodJesus in [[Dreams|visions]]. His exact beliefs concerning these prophetic dreams are difficult to pin down, but the most rational interpretation is that Chris dreams about something he'd like to do, then wakes up and decides it was God telling him to do it. In Chris's mind, each vision is simultaneously a directive to do something and proof that it will happen no matter what occurs. For instance, after Chris had a vision about fathering a [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|daughter]], he decided he was required to actively [[Love Quest|make that happen]] while also assuring himself that [[fail]]ure was impossible. When Chris was being accused of [[Chris and race|racism]] for insisting that he can only date white women, he justified this by arguing that prophesied daughter must be white.

Subsequent visions from God have supposedly confirmed that [[Blanca]], [[PandaHalo]], and [[Ivy]] were to be the mother of Chris's child, despite the fact that each of these women subsequently turned out to be [[trolls]]. This proves that God, if he exists, is either not responsible for Chris's supposedly prophetic dreams, or is having a [[Laughs Under Lucricities|laugh at his expense]].

Chris also believes that if he confesses his sins to GodJesus he will be forgiven. Private confessions directly to God are not uncommon in Protestantism, but generally it's assumed that the confessor is doing so to genuinely atone for mistakes. However, Chris abuses the purpose of confession so that he can commit whatever wrongs he wants and then wipe the slate clean with his "confession." For example, Chris made [[To_Clyde_and_Jack|a video]] in which he suggested that Clyde Cash and Jack Thaddeus kill themselves so they can burn in hell forever. He later drew them doing just that in his comic. Just one day after the comic appearance, Chris answered a fan letter asking why he had been wishing suicide upon them, and pointing out that such a wish conflicts with his Christian beliefs. Chris responded that he had "confessed of that to God and Jesus, and they have forgiven [him] on that."<ref>[[Mailbag 33#Chris demanded suicide under "reasonable hatred"]]</ref> One of two things happened: either Chris wished for their deaths in the video, asked for forgiveness, then gleefully drew it happening afterward anyway, or he waited until he'd finally got done saying his piece, then conveniently offered up his confession right after getting everything out of his system. Either way, such a confession is highly disingenuous.

Traditional theology has long dealt with the so-called "problem of pain" in books Chris is unlikely to read anytime soon. It's strange that despite Chris's strong belief that GodJesus is backing him up on his [[Love Quest]], that God imparts on him such [[stress]] and trolling. He seems to believe that the way prayer works is the same way a little kid learns to get what they want: by saying "please". To Chris, prayer is apparently like ordering a pizza, and as long as you pray for something, it'll show up for you exactly how you ordered it, a principle that applies to base and material things as much as spiritual guidance.
{{clear}}

==Afterlife==
[[Image:Apostle_paul_rembrandt.jpg|thumb|left|The likely reaction of St. Paul to Chris's 'interpretation' of the Bible]]
[[Image:Jesus facepalm.jpg|thumb|right|Jesus's reaction to Chris's antics]]

{{Quote|For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.|Ephesians 2:8-10, on the place of good deeds in the Christian faith.}}
{{Quote|Like most people; our souls leave our bodies, we end up in Heaven or Hell depending on our deeds/misdeeds, and possibly Reincarnation.|Chris, [[Mailbag 30#Questions|with his own theory]].}} {{clear}}

While the idea of good deeds causing someone to go to heaven and bad deeds sending them to hell is not an uncommon one, Protestant theology explicitly states that the salvation of one's soul is based completely on one's faith. In general this teaching means that one's prior sins (no matter how terrible) can be forgiven by God, and that members of the faith should try to live righteous lives not because it will get them into heaven, but simply because doing so is morally the right thing to do. The salvation of one's soul through faith is essentially the single point upon which nearly every Protestant denomination is based.

Like everything else, Chris fails at this basic concept, stating that one goes to heaven or hell based completely on personal actions. He personally believes he will go to heaven because he's done "[[Common Questions#Answered 01/01/10|a lot of good deeds]]". Likewise, he feels that [[homos]] are almost certainly bound to go to hell, and need to turn straight to "[[Mailbag 18#In which Chris believes he has magic powers (srsly)|better their chances of going to heaven]]". He has also stated numerous times that he feels [[Clyde Cash|various]] [[Jack Thaddeus|trolls]] are bound for hell for making fun of people over the internet. He has suggested that they [[To Clyde and Jack.MOV|commit suicide]] so that they might receive their eternal punishment faster.

Additionally, Chris [[Mailbag 21#Chris gets a call from The Doctor|believes in the concept of reincarnation]], common in Hinduism and other Eastern religions, though he has yet to offer any criteria for what might cause someone to be reincarnated. While reincarnation was and to some extent is still embraced by a few Christian sects, Chris himself realizes none of this.

==Concept of sin==
{{quote|But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you...|Jesus Christ, Matthew 5:44}}

{{quote|I PRAY TO GOD AND JESUS TO [[Death threats|KILL]] [[JASON KENDRICK HOWELL]]|Chris, [[Sonichu Girls]] Forum}}

{{quote|HAVE A GOD DAMN HEART ATTACK RIGHT NOW, THIS VERY MOMENT YOU READ THIS MESSAGE, YOU GOD DAMN BITCHING WHORE!|E-mail from Chris to [[Vivian]]}}

Other than vehemently opposing [[homos]], [[trolls]] and [[jerkops]], Chris seems to have little notion about the nature of sin and evil except that people who do things he doesn't like should go to hell. This is completely at odds with the part of Christian philosophy that states all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, and anyone who repents his sins will be redeemed.

Chris's understanding of Christian theology is extremely limited, and he does not seem to know anything about the Bible (although he apparently owns a copy of the New International Version). His homophobia had nothing to do with the prohibitions on homosexuality in the Old Testament, which he was unaware of until he heard about it from ''[[Family Guy]]''. His [[Fapcup|aversion to "spilling his seed"]] and his [[recycling|dedication to the unborn]] have absolutely no basis in Biblical passages condemning sexual immorality and abortion.

When Chris gave in to temptation and cybered with [[Vanessa Hudgens]] in violation of his monogamous relationship with [[Ivy]], Chris made [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 17th, 2009|a big production]] out of confessing his sin and seeking forgiveness. This suggests that he previously had little to no experience with the idea of repenting sins before God.

===Guilty of all Seven Deadly Sins===
[[Image:Pope face palm.jpg|thumb|right|His Holiness's reaction to Chris's commission of all Seven Deadly Sins.]]

The concept of there being "seven deadly sins" is more a conception of the Catholics than of the Protestants, who will mostly tell you that ''any'' sin is equally as bad in the eyes of God. Given that Chris very likely could not tell the difference, it doesn't matter much. 

*'''Lust''': His [[Love Quest]]. Between all the purchases of [[sex toys]] and pornography, masturbation, sexual fantasies, intentions with prospective mates, and his objectification of women, lust is not only what seems to consume his every thought, it may very well be what leads to the consumption of his soul by Beelzebub (if you believe in that sort of thing). In fact, he's now on a [[Fuck Quest]]. (See also [[Chris and Sex]]).
*'''Gluttony''': It is not quite known if Chris's [[obesity|girth]] is [[Barbara|hereditary]] or the result of [[McDonalds|over consumption]], but the latter seems more likely having been a spoiled child and being sedentary for the greater part of his life.
*'''Avarice/Greed''': Chris's obsession with gaining wealth via winning contests and his behavior in trying to do so (e.g. putting [[Cole Smithey|his brother's]] questions about his paternity on the back burner while nagging him to vote for him), demonstrate an extreme desire for material gain. Also, he steals from his parents to buy [[PS3|video games he'll never play]]. (See also [[Chris and Money]]). He's even gone so far as to [[The MovingForward videos|destroy his PS3]] in an attempt to gain money.
*'''Sloth''': Obvious; see ''Gluttony''. Content to be the proud recipient of a "[[monthly tugboat]]" while sitting on his ass playing video games and surfing the [[Internet]], Christian rarely even puts forth even the minimal amount effort necessary to draw his Sonichu comics more than a few times a year. He believes doing routine household chores is [[stress|"stressful"]] and an equivalent to holding a real job.
*'''Wrath''': [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. [[Jerkops]]. [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]. "[[CWC Update!!!!! 27 March 2009|I'LL STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH!]]". [[Chris_and_anger|Yeah...]]
*'''Envy''': [[Jerks|His attitude towards other men]] as having taken [[Virgin with rage|"ALL THE PRETTY GIRLS AND LEFT NONE FOR ME!!!"]] is a lot more envy than ''anyone'', let alone Christians, should ever hold towards anything. Another proof of his envy was the personal hate that he aimed at [[Adam Stackhouse]], the winner of the [[PaRappa the Rapper Contest]]. Frankly, Adam deserved to win, but Chris cannot accept that someone else has something (talent) which he does not.
*'''Pride''': Chris's [[Autism|self-centered worldview]] and inability to note his own flaws. Narcissus himself would look down on him for his selfishness. This is partly due to incessant coddling and sheltering from his parents his whole life, while being told that he is perfect in every way, because having autism makes him special. Chris has been told his entire life that the fact that he has autism means that he should have everything handed to him on a silver platter. (See also [[Chris and his Ego]])

===Breaking all "Ten Commandments"===

Similar to the above, the concept of the Ten Commandments is more commonly associated with Judaism than Christianity, but, as noted, Chris is probably too goddamn stupid to tell the difference.

*'''1. "Thou shalt have no other gods before Me"''': While he claims to be devoted to GodJesus [[Chris and Reality|in real life]], his [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|in-comic persona]] seems to be a full-blown God Mode Sue. Furthermore, he wears a [[Medallion of Fail]] around his neck, in the same place where TRUE and HONEST Christians commonly wear crosses.
*'''2. "Thou shalt not make an image or any likeness of what is in the heavens above"''': The most common interpretation is that this commandment does not forbid drawing pictures of heavenly beings (seen above), but instead refers to the construction or fashioning of "idols" in the likeness of created things (beasts, fish, birds, people) and worshiping them. Chris seems to believe that either the [[Medallions of Fail]] or the [[Amnyfest Ring]] are the source of [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|supernatural powers]], in direct violation of this commandment.
*'''3. "Thou shalt not swear falsely by the name of thy Lord"''': Chris has repeatedly cited the name of God when making outrageous claims about what he intends to do, whether it be to get back at [[trolls]], or to find a potential [[sweetheart]], regardless of whether or not he actually succeeds in meeting these unrealistic expectations. He also says "goddamn" a lot too.
*'''4. "Remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy"''': As noted above, the Sabbath is almost exclusively observed by Jews rather than Christians, but it is still pretty likely that Chris has broken this commandment by "going to work" (making his comics, which he intends to make money off of) on Saturday. A more straight-up example would be the countless times that he has neglected going to church on Sunday, the Christian sabbath.
*'''5. "Honor thy [[Bob Chandler|father]] and thy [[Barbara Chandler|mother]]"''': Surprisingly, Chris has come pretty close to actually obeying this commandment. Not close enough, however, as Chris has been known to do [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|things]] that [[Bob walks in|upset]] his father.
*'''6. "Thou shalt not kill"''': Hoo boy. Chris [[Death threats|seems to want to directly defy this commandment]]. Bonus points for actually praying to GodJesus to kill his enemies... and then repenting to GodJesus in the same breath. Alternatively, considering the revelation that he believes cartoon characters really exist, his actions in [[Sonichu 10]] where he collapses a building full of people, killing at least a hundred people for relatively minor slights gives him the biggest body count of the series.
*'''7. "Thou shalt not commit adultery"''': In the literal sense, Chris will most likely be following this commandment [[Virgin with Rage|for the rest of his life]]. Christians believe that this commandment states that they should avoid having any lustful thoughts, sex before marriage, etc. Figuratively, however, he broke this rule when he cybered with [[Vanessa Hudgens]] and had phone sex with [[Julie]]. In his [[comic]], his affair with [[Lovely Weather]] arguably counts as a form of adultery, as well, and even if it doesn't, his subsequent affair with Meg from ''[[Family Guy]]'' certainly does. Also, he clearly has [[Third date|no problem with]] [[F Abstinance|premarital sex in general]].
*'''8. "Thou shalt not steal"''': If [[Chris and Copyright|plagiarism]] counts, he may as well be sitting in the Devil's lap. He has stolen money from his parents to purchase games on PSN and he even purposely wrote a bad check to Joshua for a PSP. Also, one could argue that he is guilty of stealing [[monthly tugboat|your taxpayer dollars.]] However, some scholars argue that this commandment actually means ''Thou shalt not kidnap'', which Chris hasn't done ... yet. Watch your back, ladies.
*'''9. "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor"''': Chris has been known to [[Lie|bend the truth]] in order to make himself look good and to defame [[Jerkops|other]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|people]], if his [[Sub-Episodes|comics]] are any indicator. This was especially prevalent within the [[Alec Benson Leary]] saga.
*'''10. "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's goods"''': Arguably the one he is most guilty of breaking. As noted in the Seven Deadly Sins, Chris has shown to be extremely resentful to other people who win prizes, be they [[Adam Stackhouse|video games]], [[Honor Roll|art awards]], or [[JERKS|girlfriends]]. It should also be noted that the original passage in the Bible specifically forbids the coveting of your [[Liquid Chris|neighbor]]'s [[Kacey|wife]], which would be a bit redundant considering #7.

===Breaking the Levitical Laws===

The Levitical laws were written for Hebrews, as a covenant with God. They are a priestly code of social behavior, with the agreement that if the laws are followed, the Hebrews would be given the Promised Land. Despite the fact that these laws were made for a culture thousands of years ago, and only followed by strict observers of [[Wikipedia:Halakha|Halakha]], Chris seems to have no problem applying these laws to modern times and modern people. Well, [[Chris and hypocrisy|sometimes]].

In [[CWC with Bible - Leviticus]], Chris touts one of the most used and abused Bible verses, Leviticus 18:22, as evidence that [[homos|homosexuality]] is "just plain wrong". Unknown to Chris, this is a part of the old Levitical code, which has many, many other commandments. Chris breaks Levitical Law on a near daily basis.

There are many, many laws, and Chris breaks too many of them for them to all be listed here. Some prime examples include:

*'''[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus%2011&version=NIV Leviticus 11]''' This whole chapter deals with was sort of animals you should and should not eat. Even though Chris eats at [[McDonald's]] every "2 or 3 times a week", odds are that he's had pork or shellfish at least once in his life, if not many times.
*'''[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus%2019:11&version=NIV Leviticus 19:11]''' "Do not steal. Do not lie. Do not deceive one another." [[List of Chris's lies|Chris lies a lot]].
*'''[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus%2019:12&version=NIV Leviticus 19:12]''' "Do not swear falsely by my name and so profane the name of your God. I am the LORD." Most of this article is dedicated to the misuse of God's name.
*'''[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus%2019:19&version=NIV Leviticus 19:19]''' "Keep my decrees: Do not mate different kinds of animals. Do not plant your field with two kinds of seed. Do not wear clothing woven of two kinds of material." Chris benefits from the science of hybridization daily. Those Chicken McNuggets of which he's ever so fond come from hybrid corn, and you can bet his [[Chris and Fashion|clothes]] aren't a pure weave. And what is [[Sonichu]], if not "mating different kinds of animals": a [[Sonic|hedgehog]] and a [[Pokémon|Pikachu]] (itself a hybrid of the mouse and the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pika pika])?
*'''[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus%2019:26&version=NIV Leviticus 19:26]''' "Do not eat any meat with the blood still in it. Do not practice divination or sorcery." It's fairly doubtful that Chris keeps kosher about the meat, but more importantly... [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-ha-me-ha!]] [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction|FORGIVENESS BLESSINGS!]]
*'''[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus%2019:27&version=NIV Leviticus 19:27]''' "Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard." [[That Goatee WILL Grow Back]]
*'''[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus%2019:28&version=NIV Leviticus 19:28]''' "Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the LORD." While Chris has not directly violated this law, he has used tattoos to [[Chris and fashion#The "IBA." outfit|attract the ladies]].
*'''[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus%2020:6&version=NIV Leviticus 20:6]''' "I will set my face against the person who turns to Mediums and spiritists to prostitute himself by following them, and I will cut him off from his people." Chris has claimed to hear the voices of [[Aunt Corrina]], his [[Cherokian Clan|other]] [[Daniel Weston|ancestors]], and GodJesus at the former's funeral, all giving approval to his [[Love Quest|quest]] for [[china]].<ref>[[Sarah May Skype Logs]]</ref>

==Chris the Shaman==
{{quote|The spirit of Patti will have his soul for dinner tonight! She will be haunting your nightmares, Mr. Leary.|Chris, [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke]]}}

{{quote|1) "Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha" - Placing Bad Luck and Extreme Misfortune on all of those who give me grief or hate. 2) "Forgiveness Blessing" - Cures all ailments of virus or physical qualities. 3) "Hono" - Makes Gays, regardless of gender, become Straight; NEVER to be gay EVER Again. 4) "Peaceful Teaching" - Quells all disputes and disagreements within a 1000 mile radius, and turns all weaponry into dust. 5) "Come to me, my Women" - Locates and attracts 18 to 30-year old single women within a 5-mile radius.|Chris' terrifyingly insane list of "spells", [[Mailbag 23]]}}
[[Image:Ickeriss_medallions.jpg|thumb|right||The Medallions serve as Chris's connection to the spirit realm.]]

Despite his professed Christianity, Chris's beliefs and behaviors almost tend towards a sort of shamanistic mindset, where God is a force to be controlled and the universe can be influenced by various mystic rituals. In Chris's case, he seems to believe that his tirades and tantrums will somehow affect the trolls who torment him. His attacks on the [[Clown Doll]], for instance, are a metaphorical threat, but also suggest an attempt at somehow literally harming the trolls through [[Wikipedia:sympathetic magic|sympathetic magic]], like a voodoo doll. He views his revenge against his enemies in the comic or in ''[[Soul Calibur]] III'' as being equivalent to actual revenge, rather than simply venting.

The world of [[CWCville]] is also a spirit realm, where Chris is almighty and can create and shape it as he pleases due to his power of "creativity". It exists outside, but parallel, to the real world, and sometimes Chris seems to honestly believe that it's a real place, even if it's just imaginary. This idea of the spirit realm became more valid when, in a [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|video]], Chris claimed that the soul of his [[Patti Chandler|dead dog]] (now [[Patti-Chan|living in CWCville]]) would devour Alec Benson Leary's soul and haunt his [[dreams]].

While Chris has used the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] in reality, he never took it too seriously, at least until he used it on [[Liquid Chris]] in a video. With the "kidnapping" of Liquid, he then realized that he had "the power" to actually curse people. He also developed a new ability to bless people via the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction|Forgiveness Blessings]] skill. He honestly seems to believe that these powers are real, even stating in one video that if it works, then he knows he has "the power." GaoGaiGar fans then promptly wanted to hit Chris for his abuse of [[Wikipedia:The_King_of_Braves_GaoGaiGar_glossary#.22THE_POWER.22_and_Jupiter-X|ZA POWER]]. Chris later stated in a music video that if people antagonize him, they will be cursed, but if you're TRUE and HONEST, you will receive blessings.

[[Image:thoushaltnotsufferacwctolive.JPG|thumb|left||Thou shalt not suffer a CWC to live.]]
Chris ought to be aware that his sorcery is not merely atypical of a Christian, but in fact explicitly proscribed by his faith. [http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=galatians%205:19-20&version=KJV Galatians 5:19-20] lists witchcraft as one of the more blatant acts of sin, whilst in the Old Testament, [http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Exodus+22%3A18&version=KJV Exodus 22:18] commands "Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live". That's right, there's a Biblical mandate for Chris's death. Alec Benson Leary, in one of his [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|phone calls]] with Chris, attempted to point out the thoroughly un-Christian nature of Chris's dabbling in black magic, but his reasoning appeared to have little effect.

Of course, it is important to remember, even if he did convert to a shamanistic faith, chances are most groups would kick him out just as quickly. Cursing people is one of the few things Wiccans and neo-Pagans are forbidden from doing, and most all groups would look down upon his general idiocy and his dabbling into powers [[Slow-in-the-minds|beyond his comprehension]]. No matter what, Chris will likely be hated for being an [[Chris and his ego|egotistical]], [[Women's Rights|sexist]], [[Chris and Race|racist]], [[Fail|failure]].

For all we know, Chris will one day start popping magic mushrooms and writing comics based on that, which many agree would be a huge improvement on his current work.

==Delusions of Godhood?==
{{quote|Fear not. For behold I bring tidings of great joy.|Sonichu, [[Sonichu 10]]}}
{{quote|I prayed for forgiveness from the real Christian. Sonichu, will he forgive me?|Aspie Sonichu, [[Sonichu 10]]}}
[[Image:Issue 10 Pg 48.jpg|thumb|Sonichu cracks open his tomb and descends in a beam of light.]]
Starting on page 42 of [[Issue 10]], Chris displays a somewhat disturbing twist to the plot (such as it is) of his comics. [[Ultra Sonichu]] frees [[Zelina Rosechu]] from her stoned state using his Chaotic powers, then appears to [[Darkbind Sonichu]] with a message similar in tone, if not outright text, to prophecies of the coming of Jesus Christ (complete with arms outstretched as if he were suspended on a crucifix).

Later on in the issue, Ultra Sonichu travels to the world of [[Asperchu]], where the characters of that comic inform him that they were forced into their roles by Alec, and that they had been praying to Christian Weston Chandler for deliverance and forgiveness. And lo Chris-chan did send the Messiah Sonichu to end their suffering. Sonichu uses the "Chaotic Remedy" to miraculously cure them all of their [[Asperger's syndrome]] (even though only Asperchu himself had the condition) and gives them new names and new, "better" looks.

It should be noted that, like Jesus Christ, [[Sonichu]] was born to a [[virgin with rage|virgin]].

Possibly in response to criticism about acting as God, in [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_10/Page_62 later pages] Chris addressed the issue of the non-canon chaotic combo worshiping him in an incredibly ignorant manner. First, he declares that he is not God but "a servant of him and Jesus", and immediately after goes on to "forgive" Michael (the copycat Sonichu's made-over name) for "baring false witness against <nowiki>[Chris]</nowiki>", as if he has the authority to forgive the breaking of the ten commandments, ''like he's God or something.''

Further evidence of Chris's blossoming God complex comes through his answer to some of the frequently asked questions that were put to him via the [[Mailbag]], where he states that he considers Sonichu to have over a billion fans. The only other fictional character who can claim such a number is God himself. This mad fuckery is compounded by the fact that Chris is like a God to Sonichu; this means that his opinion of himself is that of a God's God. Or maybe a [[Christopher's name change|God's bear]]. Chris moves in mysterious ways.

In his e-mails to [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] he describes himself as a "Lamb of God." Jesus Christ is commonly referred to as this by many Christians.
{{clear}}

==Chris and other faiths==
Chris has never had much to say about religious beliefs other than his own, least of all non-Christian beliefs. Given his sheltered existence in the heart of the suburban American south, he probably hasn't had much practical exposure to anything but mainstream brands of Protestantism. When his "fans" asked him for his feelings on other religions during an [[IRC (28 December 2008)|IRC chat]], he glossed over the question and simply reiterated his own unthinking statement of faith. [[Vivitheg's_AIM_chat|Vivian Gee]]'s belief in Daoism, a non-theistic religion, seemed to be a concept he couldn't process.

He doesn't think much of atheists, but even there Chris has a hard time articulating his opinion. When Vivian asked him to explain why he dislikes them, he said, "I don't know, but I do know that they are not believers of God and Jesus." It's even harder for atheists to try and take GodJesus seriously enough to believe in them when Chris goes around boasting about having the deities on his side as though they were his personal avengers. When asked "You often attempt to scare your trolls by stating they will go to hell. Some of your trolls do not believe in hell, what do you have to say to them?" in [[Common_Questions#09_January_2010|Common Questions]], his response was:

{{quote|Firstly, it is NOT a "scare tactic", [[Chris and reality|IT IS FACT]]. And second, I say "Well, Believe it or not. You are Not Dead Yet".}}

This might have been Chris trying to be funny, as the second sentence doesn't make any sense.

"[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]" reveals that Chris has some awareness of Judaism, probably picked up from watching ''[[South Park]]''. He appears to not understand that Jews and Buddhists don't celebrate [[Christmas]]. However, in the way he wrote it, it is unknown if he's implying that Christians, [[Hanukkah|Jews]] and [[Christmas#Jolly Buddah (sic)|Buddhists]] go to the same place of worship, or if he's saying they go to separate places of worship and calls them "churches" because his vocabulary is heavily lacking. In [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]], Chris is being blatantly anti-Semitic by "just throwing it out there" that he thinks Snyder is Jewish, and uses "Jew" as an insult (which he also got from ''South Park''). [[Some Favored Comedians]] is a thinly-veiled furious backpedaling attempt in which he rambles on and on about how he respects Jewish comedians like [[Wikipedia:Jerry Seinfeld|Jerry Seinfeld]]. Chris has also referred to synagogues as "Jewish churches" on more than one occasion.

In a CWCipedia [[Chris-Chan_(CWCipedia)#Chris-Chan_the_Moralf.2A.2A| article]], he strongly hints at feeling great hatred towards Muslims. Although the article primarily exists to deny various accusations trolls have made about him, he does not deny being a "prolific hater of all things not Christian".<ref>[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref> Other than not being Christian, he probably hates Muslims because he's enough of a dumbass to likely believe all Muslims are terrorists because of 9/11, [[Twin Falling Towers|which he mocked]].

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Angelica Rosechu]]
*[[Dreams]]
*[[Christmas]]
*[[Christian's name change|GodBear]]
*[[Grace Baptist Church]]
*[[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]

==External links==
*[http://store.engrish.com/godjest.html Buy your own Godjesus T-shirt here.]

{{Not_Jerks}}
{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

For Julie's Eyes Only

2010-10-12T15:42:10Z

Pugs Malone:

{{honest}}

 
[[Image:Blowupdoll.gif|center]]

{{protip|"JULLLAAAY" is an old meme. Only faggots comment on Chris related videos with any variant of "JULLAAAAAAAY." Even bigger faggots are people who think it's funny to PM and/or e-mail Chris with "JULLLAAAAAAAAAY." The biggest faggots are those who think it's funny to call Chris's house and scream "JULAAAAAAAAAAAAAY"}}

[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|thumb|JULAY!]]

On 20 [[February 2009]], the closest thing [[Christian Weston Chandler]] will ever have to a [[sex tape]] was leaked to the internet. The video file '''For Julies Eyes Only.MP4''' consists of nearly eight minutes of Chris, completely nude except for his socks, making love to [[Kimmi|an inflatable sex doll]]. The sex tape was soon uploaded to SlutLoad where it has received over 2 million views, many of them coming from people wondering "Who the fuck is [[Julie]]?"

Chris produced the video using his [[PSEye]] for the benefit of Julie, the person he believed to be his trusted [[sweetheart]]. (In fact "she" was a boy, a child—just the then-latest in a series of [[troll]]s playing him for a sap and winning.) Throughout the video Chris pretends that the blow-up doll is Julie. Accordingly he treats the doll with tenderness and respect before he starts humping the shit out of it, all the while calling out Julie's name like a retard in heat. For the final two minutes of the video Chris rides the doll, cowgirl style, yelling "JULAAAAAY!!!" over and over until he achieves orgasm.

Throughout the video, Chris seems to mimic all the "educational porn" he has watched, except he chooses to mimic the positions of ''female'' performers, as when he spreads his legs wide open for Julie. There are also several cuts in the video; Chris stated in [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 10]] that he "was feeling a bit nervous, because of the condom breaking and having to pause the recording now and then. but I perservered anyway."

==Summary==
{{quote|JULAAAAAAY!!!! JULAAAAAAY!!!! |Chris while humping Kimmi}}
{{quote|You take that like a good, bad girl!|Also while humping Kimmi}}
{{quote|I'm ready to cum!!|Also while humping Kimmi}}

'''0:00-0:05''' [''Chris sits cross-legged on his bed, holding Kimmi up as though it were a naked girl standing before him, says "Hey Julie" and glances at her''.]

'''0:06-0:10''' [''He lies back as he pulls the doll into position over his [[duck]]''.] "I love you Julie..."

'''0:11-0:28''' [''He grips the doll, possibly trying to finger its asshole. He seems confused as to how to effectively copulate with this device''.]

'''0:29-0:44''' [''Our hero abandons all pretense and bends the doll at an unnatural angle (with its upper body pointed straight up and its legs pointed straight out behind it), grapevining its legs with his own and pounding it diligently. Its asshole is spread wide in full view of the camera''.]

'''0:45-0:48''' In a satisfied tone, he sighs "Mmm, Julie..." A moment later, sounding surprised by her passion, he exclaims "''Julieee!''"

'''0:49-1:25''' [''Quiet, uneventful thrusting. Chris seems to have a determined look on his face, as though he is focused on servicing his vinyl lover''.]

'''1:26-1:32''' [''A loud snap can be heard, which seems to catch Chris's attention. He lifts the doll up and examines his crotch, then reaches over to pause the recording. It's possible he has had a mishap related to whatever condoms or lube he might be using''.]

'''1:33-1:52''' [''Chris resumes filming and humping''.]

'''1:53-2:06''' [''He shifts to a sort of scissor position, with Kimmi "straddling" his right thigh. Chris keeps one hand planted on its "breast"''.]

'''2:07-2:08''' "Mmm...Julie! Julieeee!"

'''2:09-2:28''' [''More scissoring''.]

'''2:28-2:31''' "Yesss, Julie...Julie! Mmmm..."

'''2:32-2:49''' [''Chris briefly tries to stick several fingers into Kimmi's ass before rolling over onto his side. His ass is now in full view as it thrusts and quivers against the love doll''.]

'''2:50-2:51''' "You like that, don't you Julie?"

'''2:52-3:13''' [''More ass-thrusting'']

'''3:14-3:20''' "Come on, Julie... [unintelligible] take that cock...mmm, Julie!"

'''3:21-3:39''' [''Chris picks up speed...'']

'''3:40-3:43''' [''Chris puts his right leg over the doll and continues thrusting''.]

'''3:44-3:47''' "Oh, Julie...Julie!"

'''3:47-4:05''' [''More thrusting'']

'''4:06-4:08''' [''Two loud snaps can be heard as Chris takes his leg off the doll''.]

'''4:25-4:30''' [''Chris now sits on the bed and open his legs, putting the blow-up doll over his body. The scene cuts''.]

'''4:31-4:40''' [''Filming resumes. Chris is seated cross-legged in the bed, much like the first scene. He proceeds to hump the doll''.]

'''4:41-4:50''' [''Chris opens his legs and humps some more''.] "Julie... Yes, Julie... You take that like a good—BAD girl!"

'''5:00-5:21''' [''Chris now is humping the doll fast. His face is extremely red''.]

'''5:22-5:23''' "Hnmm"

'''5:24-5:25''' [''Chris cuts the film and resumes the same scene, still humping the doll while seated''.]

'''5:33-5:44''' [''Chris now starts to hump the doll on his knees''.]

'''5:45-5:53''' [''Chris now straddles the doll face-down, thrusting like a rabbit''.]

'''5:54-6:04''' [''Chris holds the doll's boobies and starts to "ride" Kimmi''.]

'''6:05-6:09''' "Oh, Julie...JULIE!! JULIE!!!"

'''6:23-6:40''' "Ju—Yeah...Julie! Julie! Hnmph...hnm... Hnmph...uhh...uhh...uh."

'''6:47-7:09''' "Hnm, ah, yeah, JULIE! I'm—ah, I'm ready to CUUUM!!! JULIE! JULAY! JULAY! JULIEEE! Julie...HNMPH!" (more moaning)

'''7:10-7:24''' "AAAAUUUUGHHHHAAAHNNN" (more moaning)

'''7:25-7:40''' [''Chris suffocates the doll with his weight by lying over her. He thrusts a couple of times and turns off the camera''.] "Julie, thank you."

==Postcards==
[[Image:Postcard_from_Ebaums.jpg|thumb|Greetings to the Chandler family!]]
Postcards were sent direct to [[Bob Chandler | Chris's father]] by an anonymous troll in early March. His family's reaction is unknown, except that his [[PSEye]] was briefly taken away.

==See also==
*[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]

==External links==
*[http://megaupload.com/?d=18NA6ERG Download it here!]
*[http://www.slutload.com/watch/w40vYGuWP3X/Chris-Chan-Sextape.html Watch it here!]
*[http://www.efukt.com/2412_Who_The_Fuck_Is_Julie?.html Or watch it here!]

{{clear}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 18 February 2009]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 4 March 2009]]|}}
{{LeakedVideos}}

Kimmi

2010-10-12T15:40:12Z

Pugs Malone:

{{honest}}

{{taxpayermoney}}

[[Image:Aiko-Chris's New Bird.jpg|thumb|right|I blew up your body... BUT YOU BLEW MY MIND!]]
[[Image:Kimmi_troll.jpg|thumb|left|Kimmi's final form.]]

{{quote|Kimmi may look shy, but she’s always ready and willing to satisfy your every need! Eager to learn about sex, she’s a Japanese animé girl come to life! She’s about 5’ tall with a removable, realistic, life-like 4” deep UR3 vagina to take you and drain you dry. Durable inflatable design. Rescue her, teach her, be her animé hero and lover!|AdamEve.com product description}}

'''Kimmi''' (full name: ''Kimmi the Anime Love Doll'', alternatively known as "''Aiko''" on some sex toy sites, in case you want to shop around) is perhaps the most notorious of [[Christian]]'s [[sex toys]]. Chris has a reputation of dumping girls at a whim, but on the 20th of February, the entire [[Sonichu]] community was shocked and appalled when they heard the news that Chris had cheated on his only ONE and TRUE love, [[Officer Nasty]], for some Asian slut by the name of Kimmi.

The shocking events were uncovered due to the leaking of the infamous [[sex tape]] - a video so shocking, it made the Paris Hilton sex tapes look like something that would be shown on the Disney channel.

Chris stated in [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 10]] that "the doll I was using was not a doll I'd choose right away, because the V-Hole and the A-Hole are linked together, so it's like my duck can go all the way through and stick out its A-Hole."

Needless to say, Kimmi noticed Chris's womanizing traits right away when he constantly referred to her as [[Julie]].

After moving on to [[Ivy]], Chris has further abused Kimmi by taping a drawing of Ivy's face to her and profusely slobbering all over it.

Chris's habit of using Kimmi to represent his various e-girlfriends has led many new to the Chris-Chan story to believe that Julie/Ivy was, in fact, no more than a sex doll and a voice in Chris's head, rather than the master [[trolls]] they were.

Recently on The Cleveland Show, it was revealed that Holt had a sex doll named Kimmi that he buried near a river. Whether or not it was inspired by this Kimmi is debatable, as evidence shows that Seth McFarline has referenced Chris a few times in his works (For example in the Family Guy parody of ''Stand By Me'', Peter, already fat and donning glasses, wears a clown shirt and looks just like Chris.)

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Fakeout-makeout.jpg|Chris forces Kimmi to undergo cosmetic surgery, changing her outward appearance to that of Ivy
Image:Fakeout-makeout2.jpg|Then proceeds to suck plastic face
Image:Fakeout-makeout3.jpg|Chris apprehends Officer Kimmi
Image:Fakeout-makeout4.jpg|Chris assaulting an on-duty officer
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Chris and sex]]
*[[Julie]]
*[[Officer Nasty]]
*[[Sex tape]]
*[[The Return of Kimmi]]
*[[Sex toys]]

==External links==
*[http://megaupload.com/?d=18NA6ERG The Chris-chan/Kimmi sex tape]
*[http://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/love-dolls/sp-kimme-anime-love-doll-12216.aspx The Love Doll]

{{Sweethearts}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]
[[Category:Things Chris has had Sex with]]

True and Loyal Fanbase

2010-05-31T06:51:44Z

Pugs Malone: /* Chris's contempt for his fans */

[[Image:SchuComicFreeBack.jpg|thumb|Spread the word!]]

{{quote|1000000000+|[[Chris's]] totally accurate and [[Chris and His Ego|unbiased]] estimate of the number of Sonichu fans, [[Common_Questions#26_January_2010|Common Questions, 26 January 2010]]}}

[[Chris]] constantly refers to his [[trolls|fans]] as his "'''True and Loyal Fanbase'''" (aka his "fandase"). Fun fact: There are no actual [[Sonichu]] fans. Literally none. Let's pretend that looking at the garbage Chris produces is not enough proof to support that statement. Let's pretend the fact that he updates his shit about once every six months, and expects everyone to wait patiently is not enough proof to support that statement. Consider this: If there actually was one, wouldn't we have found out about them by now?

Nevertheless, in [[Mailbag 48]], Chris stated that he believes he has '''over a billion fans''', meaning that roughly 1/6th of the world's population has supposedly discovered and grown to love Sonichu since the comic began back in [[2000]]. It may be worth noting that approximately 1/6 of the world's population is illiterate.

==Personal army==
[[File:ChrisPersonalArmy.jpg|thumb|This is what Chris actually believes.]]
Like many individuals who have become notorious on the internet, Chris believes that he has a sizable fanbase that adores him. Furthermore, he persists in this belief despite the fact that his "fanbase" has repeatedly proven to be comprised exclusively of [[trolls]].

Chris addresses his supposed supporters whenever he feels they would be most helpful, such as when he needs support in a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|contest]] or wants to see a [[Clyde Cash|troll taken care of]], and speaks in the sincere expectation that total strangers will carry out his orders simply because he gave them. This belief was likely reinforced by the backfired trolling attempt during the [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes]], and it's possible that's what drives him to continue acting this way.

Chris recently tried to play the Personal Army game in the aftermath of his [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|confrontation]] with [[Michael Snyder]]. The related [[Jackie e-mails]] gave us an interesting glance at Chris's perspective on his ability to command his fans, as well as this interesting tidbit:

{{Quote|Considering after what had transpired, I decided to upload the audio-only video onto my [[YouTube]]. I tried to be nice and peaceful. Now HE (Michale) will have to deal with my [[Trolls]] for his discrimination against me.|Chris, [[Jackie e-mails Part 2#The Game Place Aftermath: Chris' Version|expressing his belief that trolls will help him]].}}

It's currently unclear ''why'' Chris believes his trolls would bow to his requests. It's possible he thinks that his trolls are indiscriminately cruel to everyone, and that, if given a target, they would lash out against it without a second thought. Then again, given his sizable [[ego]] and shaky grasp on [[reality]], it's also possible he thinks that trolls will do what he says just because he said it.

==Chris's contempt for his fans==
Chris takes his alleged fanbase entirely for granted. When he doesn't want something from them, he ignores them. He is happy to try and extort them, in fact, as when he threatened [[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|to withhold his comics unless the ED page was taken down]]. Despite his contemptuous attitude towards them, he assumes that his TRUE and LOYAL fans will keep the [[trolls]] in check. Another example came on [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|27 August 2009]], when Chris implored his fanbase to remove every last video that showed the tour of his house after his father found out about it. To this day, mirrors of the two-part video still pop up to mock Chris.

Despite his belief that his fans adore him, Chris is notoriously inattentive to the sort of things that allow a person to continue having fans. He believes that people love him for his [[Sonichu (comic)|comic]], and yet his updates are often months apart. His attitude is neatly summed up at the end of [[Sonichu 10]], in the message from [[Things Chris has ripped off|Marvey Blaziken]]. Chris wants the adulation that goes along with being a popular artist, but he thinks that he ought to receive it in exchange for whatever amount of effort he feels like putting forth. Which, Chris being Chris, isn't very much at all.

Chris refuses to take responsibility for his output or lack thereof, blaming any troubles on [[stress]] caused by the trolls. In a sense, because he expects his fans to take care of the trolls for him, he's blaming them for the fact that he can't keep updates regular. He also shows his fans contempt by having the radio on in the background during fan chats over Mumble and giving extremely short, often rude, responses to lengthy, innocent questions in the [[Mailbag]].

As his ego has swollen over the years, Chris seems to have come to believe he can control what his fans do with their lives. In [[Down with asperchu|a video from January 2010]], Chris told his fans to never read an issue of [[Asperchu]] because "there are no LINKS" to Chris's works. He later went so far as to try and [[U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L|brainwash]] his followers into hating what he viewed as a rival comic.

==Chris turns on his fans==
In March 2010, after a troll interfered in Chris's pursuit of [[The Wallflower]], Chris took to his [[CWC Blog|blog]] and attacked his fans along with the trolls, accusing them of breaking up his quest for True Love out of a selfish desire to consume more of his comics. "You all are just as Terrible as I portrayed Mary Lee Walsh to be," he declared, "[[Chris and hypocrisy|so self-absorbed in yourselves]], spoiled, and such, YOU ONLY want more story arcs and art MORE QUICKLY than my own Inspiration can come up with. You all are nothing bug greedy, impatient, unloved and corrupted people."

He also claimed to tire of trying to please the "millions" of fans he has. Instead, he explained that he only wants to please "[[Chris|the local few around me]] who I truly and deeply care about." What this could mean is a number of things. The biggest thing he feels they have done is trolled him just as badly as the trolls themselves just to get his comics. Thus, because of this, he feels that they share equal blame with the trolls just because he doesn't want to spend time working on his comic.

This might represent a valuable moment of clarity on Chris's part. He may have managed to discover, however inadvertently, that all his comic really accomplishes is to draw unwelcome attention to him. Whether this realization will actually lead to a change in his behavior, however, remains to be seen.

Unsurprisingly, Chris forgets this and asks them to [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|harass a manager]] for not letting him back into a store.

==List of fans who aren't trolls==
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|Give or take 1]]<ref>Some argue that Gina, a mentally retarded young lady, was indeed a genuine Sonichu fan, but it may be possible she was a very convincing [[Robert Simmons V]] clone or a genuine [[white knight]]. Either way, after [[The_July_10th_Messages#CWC_Calls_Out_sonichuizcool| he abused her]] she's no longer a fan.</ref>

==Note==
<references/>
==See also==
* [[Chris and his Ego]]
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

True and Loyal Fanbase

2010-05-31T06:51:17Z

Pugs Malone: /* Chris's contempt for his fans */

[[Image:SchuComicFreeBack.jpg|thumb|Spread the word!]]

{{quote|1000000000+|[[Chris's]] totally accurate and [[Chris and His Ego|unbiased]] estimate of the number of Sonichu fans, [[Common_Questions#26_January_2010|Common Questions, 26 January 2010]]}}

[[Chris]] constantly refers to his [[trolls|fans]] as his "'''True and Loyal Fanbase'''" (aka his "fandase"). Fun fact: There are no actual [[Sonichu]] fans. Literally none. Let's pretend that looking at the garbage Chris produces is not enough proof to support that statement. Let's pretend the fact that he updates his shit about once every six months, and expects everyone to wait patiently is not enough proof to support that statement. Consider this: If there actually was one, wouldn't we have found out about them by now?

Nevertheless, in [[Mailbag 48]], Chris stated that he believes he has '''over a billion fans''', meaning that roughly 1/6th of the world's population has supposedly discovered and grown to love Sonichu since the comic began back in [[2000]]. It may be worth noting that approximately 1/6 of the world's population is illiterate.

==Personal army==
[[File:ChrisPersonalArmy.jpg|thumb|This is what Chris actually believes.]]
Like many individuals who have become notorious on the internet, Chris believes that he has a sizable fanbase that adores him. Furthermore, he persists in this belief despite the fact that his "fanbase" has repeatedly proven to be comprised exclusively of [[trolls]].

Chris addresses his supposed supporters whenever he feels they would be most helpful, such as when he needs support in a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|contest]] or wants to see a [[Clyde Cash|troll taken care of]], and speaks in the sincere expectation that total strangers will carry out his orders simply because he gave them. This belief was likely reinforced by the backfired trolling attempt during the [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes]], and it's possible that's what drives him to continue acting this way.

Chris recently tried to play the Personal Army game in the aftermath of his [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|confrontation]] with [[Michael Snyder]]. The related [[Jackie e-mails]] gave us an interesting glance at Chris's perspective on his ability to command his fans, as well as this interesting tidbit:

{{Quote|Considering after what had transpired, I decided to upload the audio-only video onto my [[YouTube]]. I tried to be nice and peaceful. Now HE (Michale) will have to deal with my [[Trolls]] for his discrimination against me.|Chris, [[Jackie e-mails Part 2#The Game Place Aftermath: Chris' Version|expressing his belief that trolls will help him]].}}

It's currently unclear ''why'' Chris believes his trolls would bow to his requests. It's possible he thinks that his trolls are indiscriminately cruel to everyone, and that, if given a target, they would lash out against it without a second thought. Then again, given his sizable [[ego]] and shaky grasp on [[reality]], it's also possible he thinks that trolls will do what he says just because he said it.

==Chris's contempt for his fans==
Chris takes his alleged fanbase entirely for granted. When he doesn't want something from them, he ignores them. He is happy to try and extort them, in fact, as when he threatened [[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|to withhold his comics unless the ED page was taken down]]. Despite his contemptuous attitude towards them, he assumes that his TRUE and LOYAL fans will keep the [[trolls]] in check. Another example came on [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|27 August 2009]], when Chris implored his fanbase to remove every last video that showed the tour of his house after his father found out about it. To this day, mirrors of the two-part video still pop up to mock Chris.

Despite his belief that his fans adore him, Chris is notoriously inattentive to the sort of things that allow a person to continue having fans. He believes that people love him for his [[Sonichu (comic)|comic]], and yet his updates are often months apart. His attitude is neatly summed up at the end of [[Sonichu 10]], in the message from [[Things Chris has ripped off|Marvey Blaziken]]. Chris wants the adulation that goes along with being a popular artist, but he thinks that he ought to receive it in exchange for whatever amount of effort he feels like putting forth. Which, Chris being Chris, isn't very much at all. Even during his [[Mumble]] chats, Chris would frequently have the radio on in the background, apparently not realizing how rude this was.

Chris refuses to take responsibility for his output or lack thereof, blaming any troubles on [[stress]] caused by the trolls. In a sense, because he expects his fans to take care of the trolls for him, he's blaming them for the fact that he can't keep updates regular. He also shows his fans contempt by having the radio on in the background during fan chats over Mumble and giving extremely short, often rude, responses to lengthy, innocent questions in the [[Mailbag]].

As his ego has swollen over the years, Chris seems to have come to believe he can control what his fans do with their lives. In [[Down with asperchu|a video from January 2010]], Chris told his fans to never read an issue of [[Asperchu]] because "there are no LINKS" to Chris's works. He later went so far as to try and [[U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L|brainwash]] his followers into hating what he viewed as a rival comic.

==Chris turns on his fans==
In March 2010, after a troll interfered in Chris's pursuit of [[The Wallflower]], Chris took to his [[CWC Blog|blog]] and attacked his fans along with the trolls, accusing them of breaking up his quest for True Love out of a selfish desire to consume more of his comics. "You all are just as Terrible as I portrayed Mary Lee Walsh to be," he declared, "[[Chris and hypocrisy|so self-absorbed in yourselves]], spoiled, and such, YOU ONLY want more story arcs and art MORE QUICKLY than my own Inspiration can come up with. You all are nothing bug greedy, impatient, unloved and corrupted people."

He also claimed to tire of trying to please the "millions" of fans he has. Instead, he explained that he only wants to please "[[Chris|the local few around me]] who I truly and deeply care about." What this could mean is a number of things. The biggest thing he feels they have done is trolled him just as badly as the trolls themselves just to get his comics. Thus, because of this, he feels that they share equal blame with the trolls just because he doesn't want to spend time working on his comic.

This might represent a valuable moment of clarity on Chris's part. He may have managed to discover, however inadvertently, that all his comic really accomplishes is to draw unwelcome attention to him. Whether this realization will actually lead to a change in his behavior, however, remains to be seen.

Unsurprisingly, Chris forgets this and asks them to [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|harass a manager]] for not letting him back into a store.

==List of fans who aren't trolls==
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|Give or take 1]]<ref>Some argue that Gina, a mentally retarded young lady, was indeed a genuine Sonichu fan, but it may be possible she was a very convincing [[Robert Simmons V]] clone or a genuine [[white knight]]. Either way, after [[The_July_10th_Messages#CWC_Calls_Out_sonichuizcool| he abused her]] she's no longer a fan.</ref>

==Note==
<references/>
==See also==
* [[Chris and his Ego]]
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

The GAMe PLACe

2010-04-13T14:18:29Z

Pugs Malone: /* Additional items */

[[Image:The-Game-Place.jpg|thumb|right|The GAMe PLACe]]
[[Image:GamePlace2.jpg|thumb|right|Another angle, revealing The GAMe PLACe to be adjacent to a Staples store]]

{{quote|Chris would rarely ever shake anyones hand after a game, and when he did, he quickly followed up with hand sanitizer.|[[Mimms]]}}

'''The GAMe PLACe''' is a [[Wikipedia:Games Workshop|Games Workshop]]-like Dungeons & Dragons game store that Chris went to every Friday to play ''[[Pokémon]]'' and ''Yu-Gi-Oh!'' It hosted the [[Wikipedia:Pokémon_Organized_Play#Pok.C3.A9mon_TCG_Leagues|Pokémon TCG League]] where Chris served as volunteer gym leader. Chris was probably the oldest, at the age of 26. After a long period of scaring off customers and being a confrontational douche, Chris got permabanned from the store by the manager [[Michael Schneider (Game Place)|Michael]] on 28 [[August 2008]].

==Patrons==
[[Image:Chrischannov2007.jpg|thumb|right|Blurry because [[Mimms]] was trying to be covert]]

* [[Megan Schroeder]].
* [[Mimms]], who used to be friendly to Chris and later took the infamous picture.
* [[Lucas]], who posted said picture to 4chan.
* Little [[niggos]]. Chris acted like they wanted to steal from him by hiding his stuff whenever they were nearby.
* [[Niggo|TJ]], a huge black guy (yes, really) who is one of the best players in town. Once contemplated giving the manchild a serious beatdown, but was dissuaded by Chris's craven backpedalling.
* Other nerds.

==Chris's antics==
[[Image:Sonichupunch.jpg|thumb|left|Chris acting his age.]]
[[Image:TonyTyAndBriana.jpg|thumb|Some regulars.]]
At the beginning, Chris never cursed. He also wore his Ash Ketchum costume every week, until he could no longer do so due to his weight.

Chris used ridiculous themed decks that never worked in Pokémon and he never used any strategy at all in Yu-Gi-Oh! In tournaments, Chris rarely made it past the first round. In a rare moment when he won, Chris shouted "I'm the level up king!" since that was the theme of his deck. Chris was helped in the tournament by the fact that most of the good players were out of town that week.

Chris was not a regular gym leader; the store owners realized that giving him any authority at all would end in disaster and allowed Chris to sub in only when the regular gym leaders couldn't make it. (Gym leaders are not employees, just people, generally parents, who keep track of the games.) Once, while acting as a gym leader, Chris went to the back room to get something without permission. This caused his first ban from the store for a month. Chris claimed that this incident was the final straw that got him banned forever, but Mimms reported that his final ban was for getting into a shouting match with one of the black kids.

==Emails regarding The Game Place==
<div style="border:1px dotted #4682B4;padding:5px; background-color:#F0F8FF">−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: CWCSonichu@aol.com
To: forgotwhatiknew@gmail.com
Sent: Mon, 5 Nov 2007 2:21:23 PM Eastern Standard Time
Subject: Hey, Anna

I have been recovering from the worst weekend of my life. In a nutshell, explicit fan art freaked me out, then someone else put a copyright symbol on their fan art (giving the impression of Sonichu being theirs), I responded to both offenses appropriately, then I Googled "Sonichu", and I found a page that deficated on my person and character. And the second photo-jpg on there was actually taken at The Game Place last Friday, with me thinkin' the dude was taking a pic of the child I was playing Pokémon TCG with. I had asked the guys at The Game Place to check their servaliance camera footage of the timeframe, so I could possibly learn the identity of the person who took that photo. But the guys could not get it to work; they have to talk to their boss-type person. One of them put things in perspective for me, I calmed down for a while. Then my mother comes in during my peace with a lecture of doing more things around the house; I waited for her to finish, then I bursted out the events in a mouth-running-faster-than-my-brain fashion. Now, she is possibly on a warpath against this dude. A hacking terrorist group, Anonymous, and 4Chan are somehow involved in that page as well.

Chris-chan - Encyclopedia Dramatica

<nowiki>*</nowiki>[[sigh]]*

I'm sorry; I'm still recovering from the worst weekend of my life. I'll get back to you with more positive information soon.

Take care; Chris Chan.</div>
 
<div style="border:1px dotted #4682B4;padding:5px; background-color:#F0F8FF">
−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: CWCSonichu@aol.com
To: [[Megan Schroeder|yoshimitsuharakiri@yahoo.com]]
Sent: Thu, 13 Mar 2008 1:23:00 AM Eastern Daylight Time
Subject: Follow up

I have been investigating, in addition to out-of-spite "adding fire to the flame", since I've first found it randomly in that fateful day, November 2, 2007. Please allow me to fill you in. My first major clues of a matching duo were the original date of the document creation, Wednesday, Ocotber 31, 2007, and this .jpg, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/4chan, which was obviously taken on the previous Friday, October 26, 2007. For the week, my family and I were pondering the major suspect; the dude who took that pic, which I distinctly remember seeing the camera flash while I playing a young gentleman in Pokémon TCG. Thus, my family came in and we found that Mimms had the camera in question, but he did not take the picture. Then we've suspected Lucas, but we did not question him at the time. But a more obvious expression reply was found by myself, when Saturday March 8, 2008, at the Gamestop in Forest Lakes, the Midnight release event of Super Smash Bros. Brawl, Mimms and I were watching a pair of tournament players brawling; one was playing Donkey Kong. So it brought up to mind my first word being "Monkey", so I told Mimms that. And with a turn around towards the accompanying Lucas, I said in his direction, "Well, that's something new you didn't know about "be-4" about this "Chan". I noticed a look on his face like, "Wow, I can totally wail on that tidbit of information." He said nothing. And today, I looked up 4Chan on Wikipedia.com, http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Image:Chrischannov2007.jpg, apparently 4Chan is solely a web thing that people can go on and mess around for the attention, with examples of false bombings, hackers on MySpace, and more similar events listed on there. Upon the collected information on this case I've let set on the back-burner for a while, I can only suspect Lucas for being the culpret in putting that page up in the first place, because, seeing how close Mimms and Lucas were, he had as much access to the beforementioned pic from October 26 as Mimms did. Also, I photographically remember the person who took my pic that day being tall and wearing a long coat. I'd like to put Lucas under a spotlight and question him about this whole thing, then put him behind bars for descreation of someone else's character. I'd question him myself, but Mike of the Game Place said after my mother and father questioned Mimms that Friday night, if I were to bring up ANYTHING about that page again, he would kick me out of the Game Place for like a month. If you'd like to talk to Lucas discreetly about the subject, I'd appreciate it for the benefit of my investiga tion.

Megan, I am sorry about this whole mess, and having drawn that drawing, and raging the fire and hurting your feelings and emotions. If I can, not only will I get that drawing off that webpage, but I'll try to take down the whole thing. But I can't do it alone (my mother and father have been letting it set on the back-burner without giving it much thought).

I can only hope you'll forgive me, but no matter what, I still love you as my closest gal-pal.

I hope you feel better soon; Chris Chan.</div>
 
<div style="border:1px dotted #4682B4;padding:5px; background-color:#F0F8FF">
−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: cwcsonichu@aol.com
To: theprimegamer@comcast.net
Sent: Sat, 12 Jul 2008 3:16 am
Subject: More words to add, since I was typing the earlier message on my PSP...

I've only had a few things to keep me sane, my video games (mostly Guitar Hero), my family, going to church, and the ocassional outtings with my family. Seriously, I really miss my fridays at the Pokémon League.

BTW, Ty, did you get your Playstation 3 yet? If you have, please send me a Friend Request through the PSN; my PSN ID is "Sonichu". How are you on Guitar Hero III's "Raining Blood", and the other songs in that final set? I tell you what, "Raining Blood" is so darn difficult on any difficulty. My Hammer-Ons/Pull-Offs are good, but it is really difficult for me when the notes are so close together in a tight H-O/P-O stream.

But I digress, please send my regards to everyone at the League, especially Megan and John.

Peace;

Christian Chandler.

P.S.

I've sent an apology letter to Michael at the Game Place; I hope that he will have an open heart, accept the apology and allow me back into The Place. Otherwise, if his heart was so dang sealed shut, he would really be showing himself off as the biggest Jerk and potential B-tard.

I'm sorry; I'm still recovering from the worst weekend of my life. I'll get back to you with more positive information soon.

Take care; Chris Chan.</div>

==Unbanning attempt==

Almost 2 years after his initial ban from The GAMe PLACe, Chris visited the store again; specifically, to talk to Michael Snyder in an attempt to have the ban removed. However, the visit did not turn out in Chris's favor, as [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|the audio from the incident]] shows; Michael refused to revoke the ban, and Chris left the store in a huff. [[Chris and the law|The police were called]] about the incident, according to Mimms, but Chris was already long gone by the time they arrived. Whether their involvement will continue remains to be seen.

Later that day, Chris uploaded the audio of the incident to [[Youtube]], the description of which solicits harassing and "trolling" of Michael and his fellow employees; however, it was removed from the site in a matter of hours due to a "Terms of Use Violation". Considering [[Chris and race|Chris' anti-semitic remark]] directed at Michael, his invitation for others to harass him, and the possible illegal nature of the recording, it's fairly easy to see why it was pulled.

==Additional items==
[[Image:409-CWCWeekP3.jpg|thumb|Chris stares down his youthful opponent.]]

*At some point in The Game Place Pokémon League history, Chris loudly objected to being paired up with "novices". These are ten-year-olds who still managed to beat him frequently.
*There have been emails sent by the person who manages TGP events, probably finally looking for reasons to ditch CWC's high-maintenance [[autism|HFA-ass]].
*Chris reportedly brought in consoles and hogged the store's flat screen TV, angering the manager. Of course, Chris couldn't understand why a manager would be annoyed by a squealing man bogarting his TV for hours to play [[Animal Crossing]] on "da big screen." This was corroborated by Chris mentioning a "Wii incident" when he recorded himself confronting Michael Snyder.
*Chris has since been banned from the store for acting inappropriately (such as being a racist prick, personally insulting the manager and getting into arguments with children).

==Sauces==
*[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A]]

==External links==
*[http://www.thegameplace.com/ Official Website]

{{Places}}

[[Category:Attraction Locations]]

Things Chris has ripped off

2010-02-25T16:41:46Z

Pugs Malone: /* Movies and TV Shows */

'''''Attention! This page is under construction! What you see now is a preview of the things to come. You are free to add anything you think is relevant, it will be taken into consideration when the revamping will be finished. For discussion, critique and more info, please see the [[Talk:Things Chris has ripped off|talk page]]. Thank you.'''''

{{Quote|I take it one moment at a time and let the story pieces come to me. Even if they are sometimes borrowed from a tv show or movie.|Chris, [[Mailbag 4#Admission of plagiarism|blatantly admitting to plagiarism]].}}
[[Image:090-CWComicalHug.jpg|thumb|ORIGINAL!]]
As every Chris-chan's [[troll|fan]] is probably aware of, [[Chris-chan|our autistic hero]] has quite the imagination. But some argue that due to [[stress]] and the mental block that is [[autism]], his powerful and mighty artistic ordeals cannot come to fruition. So he just does what every good TV/book/movie writer does: he goes and steals shit from other places.

Now, to his credit, stealing ain't easy. I mean, how the hell do you grab something that comes from another person's mind, adapt it to your own storyline and make it so that it fits in, without having whatever it is that you stole stand out like an obese retard with a red and blue striped T-shirt in the middle of a crowd? Being the [[Fail|geinus]] comic book creator that he is, he does not need to bother with details such as a good plot, readability, or even consistency. Just stick in a few [[random-access humor|random-access-humor]] jokes and you got yourselves a new installment in the "[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu Comic Book Series]]." Not resembling ''[[Family Guy]]'' at all, right, guys?

According to Chris, stealing copyrighted material is fine, as long as you indicate that whatever it is you’re doing is a parody of the original material. In accordance to U.S. copyright law, this is technically true, so this probably means that, unless he decides to make money out of his "artwork," he ain’t gonna have the law knocking on his door. Besides, we all know he is never going to sell any type of merchandise ever, or even [[Monthly tugboat|make a hard earned buck]] for that matter.

Onward with the list of shit he's stolen:

==Main influences==

===Sonic the Hedgehog===
* His pride and glory "[[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]," which, as we all know, is a recolor of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] and [[Pikachu]]. In his comic book debut he is created when the "[[Perfect Chaos Monster]]" attacks CWCville, which, by the way, is a direct ripoff from the Sonic series.
*His other pride and glory “[[Rosechu (character)|Rosechu]]” which is in turn another recolor from the character “[[Amy Rose|Amy]]” from the “Sonic the Hedgehog” cartoon series.
*Of course, Sonichu’s evil twin brother “[[Blake]]” also comes from the same line of original creativity Chris has got us accustomed to. This [[niggos|nigger]] version of Sonichu is a complete rip-off from the character “Shadow the Hedgehog”. His creation is partially inspired from the "Pokemon" movie in which the character “Mewtwo” is created from the DNA from “Mew” with an evil twist.
* The “Chaotic Combo” is a mesh of ''Sonic'' characters recolored with retarded deformities. Like Angelica being a white hedgehog that has wings, or Punchy Sonichu being an AZN version of “Knuckles the Echidna”.
''For more info, see the [[Sonic the Hedgehog#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Pokemon===
* Like the previously mentioned Sonichu and Rosechu characters ripping off Sonic the Hedgehog, they also rip off various [[Pokemon]], mostly Pikachus and Raichus, combined with other Pokemon-types.
* The character [[Jiggliami]] is a humanoid variation of a Jigglypuff.
* The so-called [[Sonichu Balls]] are designed off of various Pokeballs, though they also function like other items.
''For more info, see the [[Pokemon#Plagiarism|main article]].''

==Anime==

===Digimon===
{{incomplete}}
*[[Silvana|Silvana's]] origin is very similar to Gatomon's, as both were long separated from their kind and raised by evil villains who made them into their minions. The only difference being that Silvana was given a [[Pickle|penis]].

===Dragonball/Z/GT===
* [[Chris-chan Sonichu]]'s famed attack, the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] (later Shin-ye-ha-me-ha), is based off of the famed super attack known as the Kamehameha.
* The Sonichu Balls, though resembling Pokeballs, are said to function more like the titular Dragonballs, as they are able to grant a wish when all are brought together.
* Ultra Sonichu, which shares an amazing resemblance to super saiyan warriors, you know, flying sky high and kicking ass and all.
* Collosal-Chan is obviously Super Saiyan 4 from GT

===Excel Saga===
* A veritable hellstorm of shameless rips from this series appear in the Sonichu comics, in a way nearly as pervasive as Pokemon and Sonic the Hedgehog, yet comparatively subtler because he steals one-liners and monologues more than characters or storylines.
* ...although he does indeed steal characters (like Mypoe and Nabeshin and [[Bagget|the Jerkop Daitenzen]]) from time to time.
''For more info, see the [[Excel Saga#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann===

*The character of [[Simonla Rosechu]] is a ripoff of a "fanmade" Sonichu named Simonchu who, in turn, is ripped off from the main character of the series, Simon the Digger.

It should be noted that Chris has in fact never seen ''TTGL'', and as such he misinterpreted several aspects of Simonchu's design that were intended to be referential to Simon: his cape became Simonla's shell, and his Core Drill pendant became a shark's tooth necklace.

===Inuyasha===
* In [[Issue 2]], Sarah's Sonichu form pins Wes's Sonichu form to a tree, Wes making the statement "Where did this non-sacred tree come from?" This is a "hilarious gag" is referring to Inuyasha's origin story, wherein he was pinned by an arrow to a cursed tree by priestess/crack shot/vengeful ex-girlfriend Kikyo. Also, with some imagination and enough alcohol, one can see that a cloud in the background in one of the panels is shaped vaguely like Inuyasha's head.

===Pretty Cure===
{{quote|"This is so "Pretty Cure"! I'M BACK!"|[[Chris-chan Sonichu]], [[Sonichu #4]]}}

*Pretty Cure, unlike [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], is a true [[parody]] that purposefully spoofs the ridiculous costumes, magical schoolgirls, and attack names of other anime series. The [[Chrs-Chan_Pure_Pulse-Jolt_Lance|Chris-Chan Pure Pulse Jolt Lance]] (the attack that [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] and [[Crystalina Rosechu]] are able to perform with their combined [[fail|Hedgehog]] powers) is stolen from this series, and even though it's original counterpart was given a ridiculous name, Chris felt the need to make it sound like some idiot had just mashed some random words into an attack name for his own version. Oh wait...

*Also noteworthy is that Chris copied (and butchered) the pre-attack catch phases and attack poses. (Most of these rip-offs occur in [[Sonichu #4]] and [[Sonichu #5]])

===Puni Puni Poemy===
{{incomplete}}

===Sailor Moon===
* [[Sailor Megtune]], Chris's hideously inappropriate SI Mary Sue for [[Megan]], is based off of the various heroines from the series, though the name is based off of Sailor Neptune.
* The [[Dark Mirror Hole]] may be a reference to a number of related Sailor Moon places/items, including the Black Dream Hole of the Sailor Moon Super S movie (the actual place), and a mirror-like item from Sailor Moon Stars
''For more info, see the [[Sailor Moon#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Yu-Gi-Oh!===
* [[Sarah Hammer]]'s husband-to-be is depicted as Jack's Knight, a Yu-Gi-Oh! monster, because Chris had no idea what the groom looked like and didn't bother to check. Way to go!
* Chris tends to use various Yu-Gi-Oh terms during his battles ("Trap cards"? Seriously?) and is even depicted using a Duel Disk when dealing with [[Wes Iseli]].
''For more info, see the [[Yu-Gi-Oh!#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Yuu Yuu Hakusho===
* In [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction]], Chris mentions the use of a "Curse Shot", fired in the same way main character Yuusuke Urameshi would fire his main attack, the Rei Gun.

===Macross Frontier===
* Chris's infamous drawing of [[Jiggliami]] was copied off of a picture by [[Blanca]], who copied the pose from one of a popular picture of Ranka Lee, one of the major characters of the series.

==Western Animation==
===The Adventures of The American Rabbit===
* There Chris ripped many concepts for his [[Love Quest]] and lines from that movie are used in the comics ("Thanks, I will father" from the cover [[Sonichu 0]] is a line uttered by Robert Rabbit).
''For more info, see the [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Aqua Teen Hunger Force===
{{incomplete}}
''For more info, see the [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Beavis and Butt-head===
*Beavis and Butt-head appear in the Time Travel episode in a gag directly stolen from the original cartoon series (although Chris [[Chris and copyright|said "Sorry"]] to Mike Judge).
''For more info, see the [[Beavis and Butt-head#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Darkwing Duck===
* [[Darkbind Sonichu]] is a partial ripoff of this series' main character – Darkwing Duck.
* The font Chris uses to write "Darkbind" is traced from the show's logo.
* Upon arriving, Darkbind recites a completely bastardised version of Darkwing Duck's trademark entrance speeches. The main change is that the original speeches were filled with tongue-in-cheek irony, while Chris's version is completely serious and unnecessarily pompous.
* Chris calls Darkbind "D.B.", reminiscent of how Darkwing Duck's sidekick Launchpad McQuack calls him "D.W."
* [[Princess Zelina Rosechu]] may be a partial ripoff of Darkwing Duck's girlfriend Morgana McCawber (though this theory is debatable).

===Ed, Edd and Eddy===
*In one of his [[ED]] edits, Chris added a huge wall of [[Random-access humor]], including a joke from the episode [http://www.tv.com/ed-edd-n-eddy/one-plus-one-equals-ed/episode/117706/summary.html "One Plus One Equals Ed"]: "Carrots are good for your eyes, can it dial a phone?", originally said by Ed.
*In the video [[CWCFlyingElephants|"CWC's Flying Elephants"]], Chris bashes his head on his bed like a [[retard]], and quotes another line from Ed: "I'm a woodpecker! Except with dirt!"

===Family Guy===
* In [[Sonichu 7|Issue 7]], Chris meets [[Sammy]], who resembles Peter Griffin, whom goes through a series of incidents involving a sequence from Filmation's [[Ghostbusters]].
* The title of his bizarre rap video, "[[IPods_Down_and_Listen_Up|iPods Down and Listen Up]]," was lifted from the "Prick Up Your Ears" episode, in which the reverend teaching the high school about abstinence starts his performance by telling the kids, "Put your Walkmans down and listen up."

''For more info, see the [[Family Guy#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Ghostbusters (Filmation's)===
* Chris's Family-Guy-style gag rips from The Non-Real Ghostbusters created by Filmation.
''For more info, see the [[Ghostbusters#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===He-Man===
*[[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.5 (preview)]]: [[Beel]] exclaims: "I have the power!" after stealing Chris's [[Medallion of Fail]].

===Home Movies===
*[[Officer Keino]]'s appearance is ripped straight from Coach McGuirk.
*The end of the [[Giant Penis Comic]] special contains gags from the show.

===Inspector Gadget===
*[[Darkbind Sonichu]]'s nemesis, [[Clawdorf]], is (possibly) based on Inspector Gadget's nemesis Dr.Claw, who was also most of the time seen as a dark silhouette. If it's true, it is especially strange, as [[Darkbind]] is based on Darkwing Duck, not Inspector Gadget.

===Peanuts===
[[Image:119-PeanutsCWC.jpg|thumb|left|Need I say more?]]

===Ren and Stimpy===
*Sub-episode 6 rips off the Ren & Stimpy Episode "Lair of the Lummox," which Chris even acknowledges (with Ren & Stimpy thinly veiled as "Ben & Stumpy")

*At the end of episode 17, there is an advert for "Knothole"; and boasted as being from the creators of "Log".

===Samurai Pizza Cats===
*In the aforementioned [[random-access humor]] [[ED]] edit, Chris quoted a joke from the US-dubbed version of SPC: "Quiet everybody, Emperor Fred has an announcement...FRED".
*He created the [[Samurai Pizza Bots]], which is a ripoff of both Samurai Pizza Cats and Transformers. They make several appearances in the comic to help Sonichu battle the [[Jerkops]].

===Sealab 2021===
*In the same [[ED]] edit, Chris included a joke from the Sealab 2021 episode "Legend of Baggy Pants": "What? Pod six doesn't need a Pro Shop, they need a dentist.".

===Smurfs===
*[[Wild Sonichu]] seems to be "inspired" by the character of [http://smurfs.wikia.com/wiki/Wild_Smurf Wild Smurf]. Both live in treehouses. Both swing from vines (however, Wild Sonichu's vines swinging comes from ripping off of Spider-Man). Both were raised by wild animals. Honestly, the only difference between the two is that Wild Sonichu can actually talk (Wild Smurf communicated in chipmunk sounds more than anything else).

===South Park===
{{incomplete}}
''For more info, see the [[South Park#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Transformers===
* [[Optimus Prime]] mercilessly killing Decepticon spy [[Sarah Jackson]].
* Various Transformer-types are set to appear in [[Sonichu 9]] Episode 20.
''For more info, see the [[Transformers#Plagiarism|main article]].''

==Movies and TV Shows==

===Gilligan's Island===
* Thurston Howell III and his wife make an appearance in [[Sonichu 8]], hinting at the name of the head of [[4-Cent Garbage]].
{{incomplete}}

===Monty Python===
{{incomplete}}
*
* [[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Need I say more?
*[[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.8]]: An impromptu "comedic" sequence making "fun" of [[Jimmy Hill]] starts with "And now for something completely different...", contains a collage of photos and drawings reminiscent of Terry Gilliam's artistic experiments, and features a porcupine shouting: "Dinsdale!".
''For more info, see the [[Monty Python#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Pink Panther===
{{incomplete}}

===Spaceballs===
* In the [[Episode 8]] fight between [[Wes-Li Sonichu]] and [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], Chris-Chan Sonichu gets his tail singed by a fire blast then exclaims, "You burned my tail! Now it's personal!" before going on the offensive. This is very similar to the scene in the movie [[wikipedia:Spaceballs|"Spaceballs"]] where gun-hating Princess Vespa gets her hair singed by a laser in a firefight and exclaims, "You shot my hair! You son of a bitch!" then proceeds to singlehandedly mow down the attacking Spaceballs with a laser rifle.<ref>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYgQXWxJfZE#t=7m44s (''Relevant portion from 7:44 to 8:01'')</ref> While the words aren't identical, he reads the lines with the same cadence and inflection as Vespa's in his [[Sonichu_2_Official_Videobook#Episode_8|Official Videobook]] clip.<ref>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42EOCbTSJOI#t=8m06s (''Relevant portion from 8:06 to 8:12'')</ref>

===Troll 1 & 2===
{{incomplete}}

===Carrie===
* Chris's [[The High School Story]] is an amalgamation of Stephen King's Carrie, and Chris' own high school experience. Its main character, Terrah, is bullied and under appreciated, so she kills everyone with her psychic powers. It is safe to assume that Chris saw the movie adaptation of Carrie, and not the book, as it is unimaginable that Chris would ever spend his time on a book without illustrations.

===Power Rangers===
*In [[Sonichu 9]], the CWC-Power Rangers are introduced, but never seen with the sole exception of Kart Megazord.

===Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III===
*In page 28 of [[Sonichu 1]], Sonic is quoted saying "Eh... you were expecting maybe, Bugs Bunny?" a direct 'reference' to a line said by one of the non-yawning Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in the third movie. The original line was 'Eh... you were expecting maybe, The Addams Family?" It is ironic in this case that of all the lines Chris-Chan could have possibly chosen from the movie, he went ahead to choose one of the most awful, face-palming, gut-wrenchingly bad line (only second to the even worse line "Help! I'm a turtle and I can't get up!"), and proceeded to MAKE IT WORSE. Congratulations.

===Saw series===
*Louis Perez, appearing in Sonichu 10 to apprehend [[Inos]] could be named after the character from the Saw franchise (possibly a relative, as Lindsey Perez from the movies is female). Chris has previously stated, that the Saw series is one of his favorite movie franchises in one of the Mailbags. Both characters are black policemen, making the "inspiration" much more likely.

===Independence Day===
* In the [[Christian Love Day video]], he recited a modified version of the speech that the President makes before making a last stand against the aliens.

===The Root of All Evil===
* This COmedy Central show featuring Lewis Black as a judge was ripped off in [[Sonichu 10]], where the judge at the trial, named "Slack Lewis," greatly resembles Black.

==Video Games==

===Banjo Kazooie===

*[[Flame]] the Sunbird is just a very poor drawing of Kazooie who seems to want pants for some reason that no rational person can fathom. Any who enjoyed this game can only thank [[Godjesus]] that Chris doesn't seem to realize that Kazooie is a [[gal-pal|girl]].

*In [[Sonichu 9]], [[Sonichu]]'s battle with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] is ripped directly from the final boss fight with Gruntilda. The only differences are that the fireballs are replaced with dark energy and Mary does not fall to her death.

===Legend Of Zelda===
{{incomplete}}
*The characters [[Darkbind Sonichu]] and [[Zelina Rosechu]] are rip-offs of Link and Zelda, the two main characters from the series, alongside being rip-offs of elements from the cartoon series Darkwing Duck, strangely enough.

*The entire subplot about Darkbind and Zelina (involving Zelina being put under a sleeping spell by an [[Clawdorf|evil wizard]]) is taken nearly verbatim from the story of Zelda II: The Adventure of Link (where the Link from the first game must awaken the original Zelda from a sleeping spell put on her by - you guessed it, an evil wizard).

*It's not clear if he's a fan of the series, since while he's compared one of his favorite games ([[Brutal Legend]]) to The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, it's likely he simply saw the game was the highest ranking game on GameRankings and other game scoring websites.

===Mobile Suit Gundam===
*During the [[Megan]] Saga, Chris drew box art for [[John's Custom Gundam: Sisterly Rescue]], one of Chris's many fake box arts for his imaginary games. What's unique about this one is that it involves Megan Schroeder and her brother, John. Despite being about Megan, it is not a rape simulator, but instead believed to be a ripoff of Mobile Suit Gundam: Journey to Jaburo.

===Street Fighter===
* [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]]'s attack "Hyper Beam" looks a lot like Ryu and Ken's special attack "Hadouken". It appears in:
:*
:*
:* [[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.7]]
*In [[Sonichu 9]], Sonichu performs a Flash Kick on Slaweel.
*In [[Sonichu Special 4]], [[Kacey]]'s father resembles Guile.

===Super Mario Bros===
{{incomplete}}
*While ripping off one of Nintendo's biggest franchises and having affinity for Shigeru Miyamato, Chris doesn't have much interest in the Super Mario series. Due to the lack of furry material, the games (at least the later ones) focus on puzzle solving and exploration and the fact at one time Mario was the rival of Sonic, that's not a surprise. However, the wing cap ability from Super Mario 64 was used in Sub-Episode 4.

===[[Brutal Legend]]===
*In [[Sonichu 9]], during the introduction of the [[Samurai Pizza Bots]], [[Armoraxe]] uses a move that looks and acts exactly like the Solo "[[nudes|Face Melter]]" from the game. The only difference is that the move is called "Metal Melter"

* The devil [[trolls]] that appear to carry [[CChanSonichuCWC|IBAChandler]] away after he is defeated by [[Sonichu]] seem to be a rip-off of the fans that appear to carry you off when you are defeated during a stage battle in Brutal Legend. This is confirmed by the [[chris|retarded]] phrase written next to the same panel in the comic, "Hmm, What 'Legend' brought these [[fanbase|fans]]?"

*In [[Sonichu 10]], Chris using the power of [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (band)|music]] and [[son-chu|stage]] to destroy the [[4-Cent Garbage]] building may have been inspired by Brutal Legend's Stage Battles.

===God of War===
*Page 75, [[Sonichu 10|Issue 10]]. [[Collosal Chan]] pulls out lightning bolt versions of Krato's Blades to fight [[Mary Lee Walsh|Slaweel]].

==Western Comics==

===Spider-Man===
*[[Wild Sonichu]] is a partial ripoff of Spider-Man, a superhero who can shoot long web strings from his hands. He uses these web ropes to swing across the city and entangle his enemies. Also, the scene in the end of Episode 19 ([[Sonichu 9]]) is highly reminiscent of the Spider-Man movie.

===Superman===
{{incomplete}}

===The Incredible Hulk===
*[[Rosechu]]'s bat shit insane rapist form, now known as the Incredible Lioness, is based off of the Incredible Hulk. While Rosechu didn't turn green (and seeing as she's an abomination already, it wouldn't be a stretch to say that she's already bathed in gamma radiation), she gets pissed off when Jason Kendrick Howell launches a pickle at her and she tears him a new one.

==List of fiction Chris has referenced and otherwise bastardised==
While Chris's [[Sonichu|masterpiece]] is chock full of shameless ripoffs and copyright infringements, there are some references to works of fiction which can't be actually considered "ripping off", but manage to ruin the franchise in question nevertheless, for the sole fact of being referenced in [[Sonichu]]. These are mostly instances of Chris either including a minor reference to a work of fiction, or just mentioning it, in his comics. While it's not considered a crime ''de jure'', it still may be called a crime against humanity, whose culture Chris has thusly bastardised.
''Note that when such minor references concern works or franchises already listed in the main ripoff list above, they're added there, not here. It was done so that it would be easier to see how much has Chris managed to bastardise each franchise.''
*'''[[Wikipedia:Batman|Batman]]:''' [[Sonichu 8#Episode 17|S8 Ep17 p.35]]: Batman's portrait is hanging on the wall of the [[CWCville Mayoral Office]] for some completely mysterious reason.
*'''[[Bugs Bunny]]:'''
:*[[Sonichu 1#Episode 6|S1 Ep6 p.28]]: [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] says to the startled [[Doctor Robotnik|Dr.Robotnik]]: "Eh... You were expecting, maybe Bugs Bunny?"
:*[[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.8]]: Bugs himself appears in the Monty Python-esque collage, lecturing the toothless photograph of [[Jimmy Hill]] (who was implied to have sold counterfeit Warner Bros. merchandise in the past) on the evils of [[Chris and copyright|copyright infringement]].
*'''[[Wikipedia:Dig Dug|Dig Dug]]:'''
:*[[Sonichu 9#Episode 19|S9 Ep19 p.12]]: [[Simonla]]'s screen name is "DigDugette416".
:*Later, on [[Sonichu 9#Episode 19|S9 Ep19 p.17]], [[Layla]] jokes that Simonla only needs a pump to "fully dig the dug", whatever that means.
*'''[[Wikipedia:Fight Club (film)|Fight Club]] and [[Wikipedia:Chuck Palahniuk|Chuck Palahniuk]]:'''
:*[[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2|S1 SE2 p.S-4]]: [[Hanna]] tells Chris that she likes reading books by "Chuck Pala[[duck]]" (sic), who is also (according to Chris's footnote) "[[Fail|the director]] of the movie "Fight Club" (well, maybe he believes that [[Wikipedia:David Fincher|David Fincher]] is just Chuck's alternate personality?)... Yes, "Chuck Pala'''[[duck]]'''".
:*If Chris has actually <strike>read the book</strike> seen the movie, it may be the influence behind [[30 August 2009|"Christopher"]].
*'''[[Wikipedia:Grand Theft Auto|Grand Theft Auto]]:''' [[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.1 (preview)]]: [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] orders: "[[Beel]]! Prepare for Grand Theft [[Medallion of Fail|Medal]]!"
*'''[[Guitar Hero]]:'''
{{incomplete}}
*'''[[LittleBigPlanet]]:''' [[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.1 (preview)]]: For no reason at all, Sackboy appears at the bottom of the page and recites an anti-pirate advertisement for "LittleBigPlanet" and Chris's [[LittleBigPlanet videos#Sonichu Episode 1 LittleBIGPlanet Level|Level of Fail]].
*'''[[R.L.Stine]]:'''
{{incomplete}}
*'''[[Sprung]]:''' [[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2|S1 SE2 p.S-5]]: Chris is shown playing "Sprung" on his [[Nintendo DS]] for dating tips before going on a date with [[Hanna]]. He reads the infamous "So, do angels have names?" compliment and notes that it "sounds right".
*'''[[Wikipedia:B-Daman|B-Daman]]:''' [[Sonichu 1#Episode6|S1 Ep6 p.32]]: Sonic curls up into a ball and enters a pocket of whatever in Sonichu's stomach, upon which Sonichu fires him out at Metal Sonichu which also is the form of a ball. At first, this looks like a reference to balls, but upon closer inspection, it seems to be a ripoff of the Japanese Anime and Toy series B-Daman, which involves small cute robot-like characters firing balls out of their stomachs at other balls.

==References==
<references />

==See also:==
*[[Chris and copyright]]
*[[List of phrases Chris copied from media]]

[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]
[[Category:Articles needing improvement]]

List of phrases Chris copied from media

2010-02-09T14:36:23Z

Pugs Malone: added some links

It is no secret that Chris spends a [[Chris and health|healthy]] portion of his day watching Television shows. His preferences become apparent not only because he will constantly force you to listen to him talk about them, but also because Chris, in his infinite [[Chris and copyright|originality]] likes to take phrases and sentences from shows and use them word by word in his everyday [[Chris and English|speech]]. This article attempts to list all of these occurences, especially those he has used repeatedly.

==[[Family Guy]], The Cleveland Show or American Dad==
;Blocky low resolution
<blockquote>
*Source: When referring to Asperchu's inferiority, e.g. [[Mailbag 41]], [[Mailbag 42|42]], [[Mailbag 43|43]] and [[Mailbag 45|45]] 
*Origin: Family guy's "Road to the Multiverse" episode 
</blockquote>

;Grinds my gears
<blockquote>
*Source: The [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality Cwcipedia page on homosexuality], [[Mailbag 2]] 
*Origin: Family Guy's "Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story" episode: Peter gets his own segment, "You Know What Really Grinds My Gears?", talking about things that annoy him, or "grind [his] gears" 
</blockquote>

;iRitz
<blockquote>
*Source: [[Mailbag 51]]
*Origin: The Cleveland Show: "Love Rollercoaster" - A joke in which Cleveland is Steve Jobs and invents the edible cellphone, the iRitz.
</blockquote>

==[[Wikipedia:Rocko's Modern Life|Rocko's Modern life]]==
;Bad luck and extreme misfortune
<blockquote>
*Source: Describing the effects of the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] 
*Origin: "Fortune Cookie": Filburt's fortune cookie reads "Bad luck and extreme misfortune will infest your pathetic soul for all eternity" 
</blockquote>

==Dragonball==
;Kamehameha
<blockquote>
*Source: [[Parody|The inspiration]] for Chris's finishing move, the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] 
*Origin: It's the most famous attack from DragonBall Z 
</blockquote>

==[[Excel Saga]]==
;I'm much saltier now
<blockquote>
*Source: Chris likes to say this to say that he's less [[naive]] about sex than he was in high school thanks to porn. 
*Origin: Something Excel says to comment on her training. In particular, she's responding to someone describing her as "sweet", which is the only way the sentence sounds even remotely appropriate. 
</blockquote>

==[[South Park]]==
;Breakin' my balls
<blockquote>
*Source: Said about something that gives him a lot of [[stress]]. 
*Origin: "Kenny Dies": Cartman tries to start a business selling aborted fetuses to stem cell research laboratories. When making deals over the phone, he says "Ugh, you're breakin' my balls man. Got 'em in a vice grip, here." 
</blockquote>

;Shove your ass down your throat and make you eat your underwear
<blockquote>
*Source: Threatened [[Clyde Cash]] with this line in [[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|this video]]. 
*Origin: "The Breast Cancer Show Ever": Wendy challenges Cartman to a fight after the latter makes an extremely tasteless breast cancer joke. Cartman, not wanting to fight, tries to talk her out of it, but refuses to apologize for the joke publicly, prompting Wendy to threaten him with this line.
</blockquote>

[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]

Talk:Squirtle

2010-02-05T18:19:53Z

Pugs Malone:

While it's safe to assume that 99% of the time if someone discusses Squirtle, it's Yawning Squirtle, but shouldn't this really redirect to [[Pokemon]] like other Pokemon names are? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:24, 5 February 2010 (UTC)
*When I make a redirect, I consider what article most people are looking for when they search for it. As you said, about 99% of people who search for Squirtle have Yawning Squirtle in mind. The reason most other pokemon names redirect to Pokemon is because they don't have their own pages. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 08:00, 5 February 2010 (UTC)
*What about Snorlax? That's a pretty well-known nickname for Barb, but it redirects to Pokemon instead of the page about her. [[User:Pugs Malone|Pugs Malone]] 18:19, 5 February 2010 (UTC)

Julie Reveals Herself: The Prequel

2010-02-02T22:35:08Z

Pugs Malone: /* Transcript */

A fan chat wherein chris is.

==Transcript==
 Chris: *stressed sigh* I guess I gotta try to uh... get back my PSN account. I have to talk with the Playstation people. A-A-Any-But in this-At this point, ah yeah, I will be able to make it into the Mumble tonight.
 Max: Why not [barely audible]
 Chris: Huh?
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: How come there-I might be a little later... tonight, so basically this will be our chat, yeah, at this point. Probably get my, uh-[interrupted by Max]
 Max: [again, what he says in completely inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh*
 [long pause, presumably Max is talking, but barely anything is heard but a single "But uhh..."]
 Chris: Woah. Okay, who took it?
 Max: [inaudible again]
 Chris: Well, PLEASE tell me who took it.
 Max: Shut up [I shoulda?] [inaudible]
 Chris: *small sigh*
 Chris: *big, stressed sigh* Look, Maaaaaaax... [pause] Ah, Jesus Christ... *sigh* [pause] *sigh again* Well, if I ask you for my PSN back, you're not send m-you're not gonna send Julie here. Just wanna make sure we're understood here. And also, what happened to my-my-I just checked on SonichuandRosechu.com, it's not there!
 Max: Alriiight, [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* Yeah...
 Max: [inaudible, but something can be heard from his end]
 Chris: *inhales, sighs hard*
 [pause]
 Chris: *inhales, sighs hard yet again* Alright, I want my-Alright, I want my stuff back. *sigh* [Max probably says something here, but nothing can be heard] Alright, well- Wait, I'm sorry, can ah- Ugh... oh... Oh geez! I'm sorry, I want Julie, I WANT JULIE!
 Max: [says SOMETHING]
 Chris: *sighs* Look, ah- Uh... Quit messing around!
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: Come on, this is serious!
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* Well, look, I'm sorry, I definitely w-
 Max: [interrupts, presumably talking about the PSN or Julie deal]
 Chris: *sigh* Yes... Yes I accept that.
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: Uh... Jesus Christ...
 [Max turns into JULAAAAAYYYYYY]
 Julie: [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* Uh, Julie! I-Uh... Y-Your brother found out that I can get my PSN account back and-and my Yahoo! account back, since uh... well, s-s-since apparently these people have hacked into my PSN and my Wahoo account, and I think-uh... anyway, they made me choose-made me have to make a choice: You or my PSN and my Yahoo! account.
 Julie: [probably saying "Did you pick the latter?"]
 Chris: No, I chose you.
 Julie: [inaudible]
 Chris: Yeah... Yeah! Alright-Alright, but listen, Jolie, do me a favor, try to uh-try to get my PSN and Wahoo account back from your brother for me. *sigh*
 Julie: [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh*
 Julie: So, how are you liking your misery?
 Chris: Not easy, but I'd rather have my true love. Yeah.
 Julie: [again, inaudible]
 Chris: Alright. Yeah.
 Julie: [inaudible]
 Chris: Alright, well who took it?
 Julie: My brother did. [HOORAY I CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE SAID]
 Chris: *sigh* That much comes to me at no surprise. [pause] Mmm...
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: Ye- ye- yeah, listen, please. Give me back my, uh, PSN and my Yahoo account.
 Max: Hell no, it's mine.
 Chris: Well, fine, then send Julie over here, please.
 Max: [yet again, inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* Wait, what?
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: *stressed sigh* Yeah, let me talk to Julie, please.
 Julie: [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* Julie. Yeah, he admitted that he did, he did pretty much steal my, uh, PSN, and my Yahoo accounts. My- yeah, your brother, just now. [pause] *sigh* Julie, I want- I lo- I love you and I want you, but also put so much investment in my own Playstation account and uh, Sonichuandrosechu.com.
 Julie: [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* Because he's sending you to me. [pause] Ah, goddamn it. Alright, well, uh, I'll try, well, don't tell Max, but I'll- try to, uh- *stress sigh* I talk to the plays- I'll call Playstation and uh, try to get my PSN account back, and uh, Yahoo as well. [pause] Alright.
 Julie: [inaudible]
 Chris: Well, I'm disappointed, and I'm saddened.
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: Ahhhhh! Uhh, MAAAAAAAX! NO!
 Max: [still inaudible]
 Chris: Because it's taken so much- I've invested a whole lot of time and effort into!
 Max: [still inaudible]
 Chris: Yeah, you're stealing that from me! *very stressed sigh* [pause] *sigh* Look, you want me show you, you want me to show you my book? [pause] Ahh.
 Max: [still inaudible]
 Chris: No. I was, no I was just, showing-
 Max: [inaudible, yelling at Chris]
 Chris: No, you asked me to do it and I was just saying I would do that to get my- N-no! [pause] Oh, you were kidding, so, yeah, but yeah, but still, just so you know, I would do that, so- [pause] Alright. Well, I'm not gonna show it- I will not show it to you then. Oh, but seriously, please. Thank you, don't do this to me. I've had a lot of tough- so much bad times in my life. *sigh* Yeah, so I admit, this is, been- this is one of them, but please. Please. Give me back everything.
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: Oh, for, how am I gonna persuade? *sigh* Let's see. I will send, I will, after Julie, I will mail you back a copy, of, uh, Street Fighter 4, after I get in a month, forward.
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: Ahhh, no! No! No! [pause] Look, what do you want? What do you truly want from me?
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: Ahh! No! No! No! No! No! No! Stop it! Stop it! [goes into a screaming tard rage] '''MAX, YOU STOP IT RIGHT NOW YOU BASTARD, STOP IT!!! YOU STOP IT RIGHT NOW! YOU'RE REALLY MAKING ME ANGRY!'''
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: Ok, so you're gonna change everything back to the way it was. *sigh* Just change it all back to everything it was, please. Otherwise I'm gonna get furious again.
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* Max, ple- [interrupted by Max] Max, you give me back my account right now! You give me back my account right now!
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* Look, I want Julie and I want my, I want my stuff back safe and sound!
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: *sigh* I want Julie. [pause] Yeah, love is my first priority, but then- but then I want my stuff back!
 Max: [inaudible]
 Chris: [tard rage resumes] '''AHHH, YOU'RE MAKING ME SO ANGRY!!!''' [pause] '''YOU FUCKING SUCK SO HARD!!!'''
 [12:13 mark]

==External Links==
http://www.mediafire.com/?ykfwxhyco3g

{{FanChats}}
[[category:Phone calls]]

Mailbag 49

2010-01-31T16:34:47Z

Pugs Malone:

__NOTOC__'''Mailbag 49''' was uploaded on the [[CWCipedia]] on 28 [[January 2010]] and answered on 30 January 2010. Chris's answers seem particularly short and rude this time around, with his longest rant being a long tirade lying about Rosechu not having a pointed tail when she was still a Raichu (which is a way to distinguish gender in Raichu's from the later [[Pokemon]] games; such distinctions between gender did not exist when [[Sonichu 0]] was first posted).

==Answered==
===Apparently that's reason enough===
{{Email|From: Joseph Barale <frasatar@yahoo.com.au>

Why would you want to do a vaccine on [[homos]]exuality and asexuality? What have they done to you?
 And what do you have against Alec anyways? Please tell.}}
{{EmailReply|They both tick me off.}}

===Chris loves his country===
{{Email|From: [[wikipedia:The Simpsons|Bart]] [[wikipedia:The Venture Bros.|Sampson]] <duckfinn@gmail.com>

Hey Chris!

I'm just curious, I know you're a [[Apology for 9/11 Joke|patriotic American]], how do you feel about President [[Obama]]'s plan to repeal the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy in the military? As an openly homosexual person do you think you're going to join the forces and fight for your country? Also, are you going to have [[Sonichu]] join the military in your comics at any point once the repeal is in effect?

A TRUE and LOYAL fan,
-Bart}}
{{EmailReply|I Am Straight. I would never join the military. Let Obama Repeal the policy, then the homos can go die in explosions.}}

===It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.===
{{Email|From: Bukovinszky András <bukiandris@citromail.hu>

Dear Chris!

I've never really liked you, but I feel I should thank you for something. 
I've been planning to leave my parent's house and go to [[college]] lately, but I didn't had the courage to do it. I always thought how it would be easier to stay here for a little more. Then I remembered you and how you lived with your parents for 27 years. It came to me shockingly that if I don't move out, then I'll slowly become just like you. I can't let that happen.

So thank you Chris for giving me confidence in this matter!}}
{{EmailReply|Whatever works for you.}}

===Then go answer her letter for real, asshole!===
{{Email|From: Kali Smith <kali.kitsune@hotmail.com>

I don't like that you've edited my previous email... you're such a hypocrite when it comes to free speech and honest truth. :(}}
{{EmailReply|I apologize; I am working on improving on that.}}

===So basically nothing===
{{Email|From: [[wikipedia:Fist of the Blue Sky|Kenshiro Kasumi]] <hokutogoushaha@googlemail.com>

Dear Christian W. Chandler

What, in your mind, makes Sonichu so great? What makes it so appealing? Why should it appeal to everyone? Why should everyone be in to Sonichu? 
Looking forward to your answer. Keep fighting the good fight.

Kenshiro Kasumi, signing out}}
{{EmailReply|It just is.}}

===Revisionist history===
{{Email|From: Kali Smith <kali.kitsune@hotmail.com>

It's become very clear that you're a constant liar and that makes me very sad, as I was honestly, one of your hugest fans...

It's obviously clear that the [[Raichu]] you drew was a male Raichu, based off the illustration and the year this issue came out, before there were gender classes in the [[pokemon]] games.

Instead of admitting that the original Raichu was a girl version based off the previous games before there were gender classes, you're now twisting the time continuum of the Pokemon series with the copyright publication of issue #0.

If you want to keep me as a fan, I expect you to practice your own words of being "honest content"... lest you be a hypocrite. }}
{{EmailReply|IT was drawn BEFORE Gender-Characteristic Differences were made obvious. And within the Two Panels, that "Point" in the first was PART OF THE WATER; The other had an extra piece of Pen Mark OUTSIDE the panel box. THESE were APPARENT BEFORE the Rainbow hit; UPON STRIKE, Her Tail became more Pointed IN THE TRANFORMATION TO [[Rosechu]].}}

===Educational porn===
{{Email|From: Lauren C <l.cot@live.com>

Hello, Christian, I hope you're doing well.

I was wondering... how do you think pornography is in any way educational? It's like trying to learn kung-fu from an action movie or learn about forensic science from CSI. Every second of pornography is precisely planned and scripted, and any awkwardness is glossed over, if not eliminated entirely via video editing. It's not a realistic approach to sex in any way, and therefore can't really be learned from.

Have a wonderful day!
-LC}}
{{EmailReply|There ARE Educational Porn Videos provided by such places as the Sinclair Institute; Google the videos.}}

==Rejected Mailbag==
===[[Butt garments]]===
{{Email|From: untidyproblem@selfaware.com

How many diapers do you personally go through a week on average? Or do you wear cloth diapers instead of disposables?}}
{{EmailReply|I DO NOT WEAR DAIPERS.}}

{{Mailbag}}

Chris and copyright

2010-01-28T18:17:05Z

Pugs Malone: /* Copyright registration */

[[Image:SonichuCertificate.jpg|thumb|Chris's copyright registration certificate]]
{{Quote|...anyone using my characters and all Without My Consent are Criminals, and such people should be reported to the Police immediately.|[[Chris]]|[[CWCipedia]]'s Copyright page}}

Like with many things, [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a very obscure idea of what '''copyright''' entails. He believes that all copyrighting something involves is [[CWC - Hand Drawn Original|<nowiki>[putting]</nowiki> a little C-In-A-Circle and <nowiki>[his]</nowiki> John Hancock]].

Chris doesn't even know what a copyright ''is,'' legally speaking. He can't ''copyright'' [[Sonichu]], but he could '''trademark''' Sonichu. He could copyright individual works using Sonichu. Too bad he doesn't know anything about anything.

== Sonichu as a copyrightable work ==
[[Image:116-CWCCop.jpg|thumb|right|180px|Crooks!]]
In Chris's mind, it's perfectly reasonable to take two very popular fictitious characters and mash them both together in a [[Fail|failtastic]] [[rainbow]] of [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|incestous]] [[Sonichu|electric]] [[Rosechu|rodents]]. This means you've created a completely new thing, and therefore are entitled to the rights of said "Original Characters" regardless of how crappy, ''un''original and disgusting they may be.

Here in real life, however, any work that uses ''previously copyrighted work'' as a basis is a derivative work; this means that while it can be copyrighted by the creator, it cannot be published without permission of the original copyright holders. There are very specific exceptions to this rule. One way to avoid this is to simply not use too much of the previous work's material to begin with: complete works or significant portions of them are copyrightable, but you ''can'' steal general vague ideas as much as you want (and Chris is stealing way too much to qualify for this). Another would be Fair Use: use the copyrighted work to provide criticism, journalistic or educational information, or parody (of which more later). In short, Chris has no excuse.

Moreover, any attempt to argue that Sonichu is not a derivative work would be entirely self-demolishing. Sonichu is ''explicitly'' stated to be a fusion of two existing characters, both by Chris as its creator and in the comic story itself. Chris has worked the fact that the two original characters were merged into Sonichu's backstory and the Sonichuverse in general. His process of incorporating copyrighted properties into his works is both ''unabashed'' and ''deep-rooted''. He ''can't'' talk his way out of this.

Apparently, the idea of Sonichu being a publishable work stems way back into the character's creation. According to [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile|Chris's]] [[Sonichu (character)|"autobiography"]], when Chris ended up backed into a corner as to what to put onto a CD cover, he decided to fuse Sonic and Pikachu, whom he couldn't use because of they were copyrighted characters, and turn them into Sonichu. When his teacher accepted the portmanteau character, Chris automatically assumed that he was free to create his multimedia empire from them. In [[Father Call|call with Kacey's father]], he also says his father said he had been in the clear with the beginning as far as copyright is concerned.

So let's remember that Chris is so [[naive]] that he would treat the advice of his high-school teacher as if it were the law of the land.

== Chris as an enforcer of rights ==
[[Image:117-CWCSonichuLeer.jpg|thumb|right|Don't look right into their eyes.]]
Chris is very paranoid regarding his copyright, and will frequently [[CWC Public Disclaimer|hand out all of his personal information to complete strangers]] if he thinks it is being contested. This has backfired in a plethora of astounding ways.

Chris has encouraged people to report copyright infringements to the police. The police, unfortunately, can't do much when random citizens report ''civil offenses'' such as copyright infringement. Even if Chris ''had'' the rights to the works in question, suing people for copyright infringement would be Chris's job and his job alone, or that of a representative whom he has specifically appointed to that specific task.

Unsurprisingly, Chris is a total and complete hypocrite when it comes to abusing the work of other creators. In the span of nine issues, Chris pulls characters and concepts from numerous franchises and even goes so far as to steal "original" characters from [[trolls|fans]] and [[sweethearts]] without an ounce of due respect to their creators. It's easy to say that, if Chris were to make money off Sonichu ''somehow'', he could easily be sued by those who created the characters he stole.

Even worse, Chris refuses to listen to anyone, especially the original creators of his "original" characters, when they know Chris has done wrong. The best example would be the ever-continuing fight between [[Evan]] and Chris over the character [[Simonla]]. When Evan demanded that Chris remove Simonla from the comics in an on-screen death, Chris refused because ''it would take Wild Sonichu's girlfriend away''. That's right: Chris refuses to remove a character because of a meaningless throw-away relationship between minor characters.

===Copyright registration===
It appears that Chris has actually paid $45, and somehow got [http://cocatalog.loc.gov/cgi-bin/Pwebrecon.cgi?v1=1&ti=1,1&Search%5FArg=Sonichu&Search%5FCode=TALL&CNT=10&PID=ZvDUHHsi-vkzrRWQU2p5oLpU7yxe&SEQ=20091106120549&SID=1 Sonichu approved by The United States Copyright Office]. In 12 November 2009, he also posted a scan of the confirmation letter he received to [[CWCipedia]] and posted a highly predictable [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|my-heart-level-just-went-to-100%-again video]].

Psychologically, this copyright registration represents a big win for Chris, because it gives him what he thinks are bragging rights ''even'' though he has no idea what the copyright registration ''actually'' means. In his confused state, receiving a registration from the US Copyright Office means that he has been right the whole time and now he ''officially'' has all imaginable intellectual property rights regarding his character and creations. In his mind, he now has the right and the power to tell everybody how Sonichu may or may not be used. The most annoying thing about this is that unless Chris actually sues someone or someone sues Chris, we can't make him shut up about it - the state of intellectual property legislation is such that people can make all sorts of weird assertions ("I patented forks and knives ''when used over the Internet''"), and if someone's wrong, that is up for the courts to settle.

Now, here in reality, copyright registration is not an official ''recognition'' of copyright. It is an officially registered ''assertion'' that a person or company has created a specific work at specific date. Every new work automatically has copyright whether it's registered or not. The registration of copyright is only required if you're suing people for copyright infringement. One party asserts that a work has been created at one time, another party has used the work at another time, and then it's up to a judge to decide who is in the right. If Nintendo or Sega sue Chris, they can easily demonstrate that they've held the rights to original characters like Sonic and Pikachu and Chris's work is derivative. More important, Chris does ''not'' have a trademark on Sonichu; he has never had it, and this registration doesn't have anything to do with trademark rights.

We know Chris messed the registration up, but the sad thing is that without complete documentation of exactly what he submitted, we may never know exactly ''how'' badly Chris messed this up. The documentation Chris published doesn't show exactly what he submitted. The application appears to be for "digital files", which is probably to say specific image files, created in 2000. (We'd need actual documents, because Chris will probably say that he has ''official'' copyright on a ''character'' he created in 2000 and babble some more confused nonsense.) It's also possible that he has submitted files that ''weren't'' created in 2000, and he's just insisting that the ''character'' was created at that time. These kinds of distinctions and little details can be extremely important in a court of law.

'''IN SHORT:''' Chris's copyright registration doesn't mean his comics are non-infringing.

=== Use of copyright notices ===
The way he maintains his so-called copyrights within his works is also baffling. It's possible Chris goes by the assumption that almost everything he draws must contain copious amounts of copyright notices, usually in the form of this disclaimer, written in large cursive any third-grader would be embarrassed to maintain (pity any poor bank employee who must look at his checks);

{{quote|© Christian Weston Chandler, March 2000-????}}

However, only '''daily''' newspaper comic strips have constant notices reminding about copyright due to their daily nature, and usually these notices are edited out of strip compilation books for basic aesthetic purposes. In most forms of media throughout the world, one copyright notice at the beginning of the work is enough to assert rights, and only the year is noted in a copyright notice. However the way his copyrights are drawn, they are not in the traditional 'mouse type' which is unobtrusive to most readers, but in large written letters which distract incredibly from his work.

Finally, the year of the creation of a certain work, not the year it was created, is what should be noted in the copyright; for example [[Sonichu 10]] should be "''© 2009-2010 CWC''" (abbreviations are allowed in notices), '''not''' the example listed above. Going by this, if a copyright lawyer was hired by Chris in an attempt to maintain his copyrights, it would be questioned and likely Chris would lose his case because the date of copyright and release were conflicting and incorrect.

Chris also obsessively includes copyright symbols in pictures he draws of Sonichu, including a picture he drew in the snow in his [[Holiday Greetings]] video and a doodle he drew on his ticket to the 2005 [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] convention.

===Chris's motivations===
Chris doesn't really understand what his copyright registration means and what it might or might not be good for, practically speaking. To him, it's mainly just a crutch for his ego. In the aftermath of his feud with [[Liquid Chris]], he sees it as the final and clinching proof that he himself is the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of Sonichu. On 26 November 2009, he posted the following as part of an announcement on [[CWCipedia]], which is quite illuminating:

{{quotebox|Also, I have been thinking, although all Sonichu "Merchandise" sold online in the past I have labeled false; I did that, because it came as a surprise to me then, I felt outraged appropriately (most everyone can relate to that; it's comparable to if Godzilla or Clover came to YOUR Metropolis and suddenly attacked your city). I realize now that even though it is still considerably Not Official, it all still is an homage to my creation. So I will make it clear to ALL those Vendors.

As long as it is NOT printed copies of my books' pages, or bootlegged copies of my "Christian Weston Chandler, Yep, I'm On T.V." DVD, AND As Long As I am quoted on ALL websites' and vendors' locations as Original Creator of Sonichu, Rosechu, Cwcville and all of such, I, Christian Weston Chandler, approve of such merchandise from Day Forward. At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera and such.

I have spoken, and I wish everyone a Safe and Happy Thanksgiving.

--ChrisChanSonichu 02:17, 26 November 2009 (CET) }}

Translated from the jackass, he's saying that he doesn't actually understand or care about the legal and economic ramifications of other people using his supposed intellectual property, so long as he's the one that gets the credit, not some impostor in brown stripes. Money isn't as important to him as his precious e-fame.

==Chris's views==
{{main|Parody}}
Chris is VERY protective of his characters. Well, as protective as an autistic manchild could be to such unoriginal monstrosities. Chris believes that his characters are officially parodies, thus, he is allowed to create his multimedia empire on a legal loophole. What Chris fails to realize that is that parodies are essentially just mockeries of something they're based on, done for laughs or as a commentary on the original work.

Some examples: [[Wikipedia:"Weird Al" Yankovic|"Weird Al" Yankovic's]] songs are considered parodies; note, however, that he obtains permission from artists whose songs he covers, going through the necessary legal process to make his work. He also does his own work, including pastiche of artists' styles, and impressively so, with a Devo frontman commenting that Weird Al's [[Transformers|"Dare to Be Stupid"]] encompassed his entire body of works in one gag tune. It's a known fact that Yankovic actually has one of the tightest, most competent legal team in music to make sure his parodies don't get him in legal trouble down the road. [[Wikipedia:Mel Brooks|Mel Brooks's]] works are considered parodies, but his most famous parodies either use works from the public domain (such as ''Young Frankenstein,'' based on the novel and done in the ''style of'' classic Frankenstein films) or cover similar plot points without actually lifting characters. Likewise, the creators of another famous parody, ''Airplane!'', acquired the rights to a film they were very closely parodying so there would be no legal trouble. Works that "parody" scenes by copying them verbatim, like ''Scary Movie'' or [[Family Guy|a certain animated sitcom]], are usually looked down upon for simply relying on [[Random Access Humor|constant references]] in lieu of actually parodying the original work.

Sonichu and Rosechu are ''not'' parodies, just shitty recolors. As mentioned on the "parody" page, Chris doesn't mean to make fun of the characters they're based on, he slavishly imitates the kind of adventures they have in an attempt to tell his own stories. The stories he makes aren't commentaries on the style or message or story of Sonic or Pokémon; he simply lifts elements and characters wholesale in lieu of creating his own world. Even his most original characters are either based on [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|someone he knows]] or [[Flame the Sunbird|are cribbed extensively from existing characters]]. He might be able to claim a trademark on Flame the Sunbird, of all characters, because he's merely relentlessly derivative as opposed to stolen wholesale. The non-Chris-Chan core of the comics, though, most certainly cannot.

Regardless of how much claim he's ''really'' entitled to, Chris will make a great deal of noise about protecting his work when he feels it is being threatened. Whenever he finds his work being used elsewhere without his permission, he ends up demanding that the offending work be taken down within 14 days or he will pursue legal action, sometimes accompanied by a picture of Chris and Sonichu glaring at the offender as if they can actually ''do'' something. Thus far, there is no evidence of Chris actually pursuing legal action against anyone.

With the use of Sonichu, the Chaotic Combo and Chris himself in the [[Asperchu]] comics, Chris has used a brand new method to get his characters away from others - by [[death threats]].

== See also ==

*[[CChanSonichuCWC]]
*[[Jimmy Hill]]
*[[Parody]]
*[[Asperchu]]

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Chris Sex Videos

2010-01-28T18:15:21Z

Pugs Malone: /* Long.mp4 */

{{Honest}}

[[Image:CWCmassdebate.jpg|thumb|right|Chris jerks off in his own kitchen, making it even less sanitary than usual. Also: animal impersonations.]]
On 25 September, [[2008]], [[Christian]] recorded himself making disturbing animal impressions, disrobing, and then finally [[masturbating]] and ejaculating into a clear plastic cup. Chris was apparently chatting with then-future heartsweet [[PandaHalo]] while gratifying himself in his parents' kitchen. These videos were recorded near the height of Chris's relationship with [[Blanca]], almost a month before she officially broke up with him and only four days before Chris sent her a [[Chris's Letter to Blanca|letter]] pledging his undying love.

The background for the videos is Chris's parents' kitchen, which is piled high with junk. This is also where the family PC is located. The short video clips were taken with a webcam and are completely silent, adding to the overall sense of terror.

This is the same room where Chris was later [[Bob Walks In|caught]] masturbating.

==Chrischan the Elephant==

<center>{{Infobox/video
| name = Chrischan the Elephant
| image = {{#ev:youtube|Q-qFR5AyYMs}}
| Stardate = 25 [[September 2008]]
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = {{Sex}}[[Sex]]; {{Galpals}}[[Gal pals]]
| Performance Style = {{Crazy}}Crazy
| Saga = {{Panda}}[[Panda]] Saga
| Shirt = Undocumented
| Other = {{Leaked}}Leaked
| previous = [[Chris_Chan_Update_24_September_2008#Video|Chris Chan Update September 24, 2008]]
| next = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_the_Chicken|Chrischan the Chicken]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

Chris makes a terrifying, bug-eyed face at the computer screen and shakes his head. He then turns to the side, puts his curved hand up to his mouth, and bangs his head back and forth.

==Chrischan the Chicken==

<center>{{Infobox/video
| name = Chrischan the Chicken
| image = {{#ev:youtube|Yx3lGNvDZi0}}
| Stardate = 25 [[September 2008]]
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = {{Sex}}[[Sex]]; {{Galpals}}[[Gal pals]]
| Performance Style = {{Crazy}}Crazy
| Saga = {{Panda}}[[Panda]] Saga
| Shirt = Undocumented
| Other = {{Leaked}}Leaked
| previous = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_the_Elephant|Chris-Chan the Elephant]]
| next = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_Undressing|Chrischan Undressing]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

Chris stands, and repositions the webcam to better show off his body. He is smiling. He puts his arms near his nipples and begins flapping his arms, mimicking a bird. He opens his mouth in a pained, silent scream and rears his head back. He sits down at the computer and repositions the webcam once again, smug and contented.

==Chrischan Undressing==

<center>{{Infobox/video
| name = Chrischan Undressing
| image = {{#ev:youtube|4AbZCCS5w28}}
| Stardate = 25 [[September 2008]]
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = {{Sex}}[[Sex]]; {{Galpals}}[[Gal pals]]
| Performance Style = {{Crazy}}Crazy
| Saga = {{Panda}}[[Panda]] Saga
| Shirt = Undocumented
| Other = {{Leaked}}Leaked
| previous = [[Chris_Sex_Videos#Chrischan_the_Chicken|Chrischan the Chicken]]
| next = [[We're_Being_Watched#Video|Chris Chan Aeon Flux 100408]]
}}</center>

===Transcript===

Chris smiles a disturbing smile and types on the keyboard. He then suddenly pulls up his green polo shirt, revealing a separate, red T-shirt underneath -- the sleeves of the red shirt are clearly visible -- although the bottom of the red T-shirt stops just below his large, flabby breasts, forming a kind of improvised [[Sports_bra|sports bra]]. The red shirt is apparently tight enough to function as a support garment, and may have belonged to Chris when he was a young child.

Chris unbuttons and struggles with his ill-fitting green polo shirt, grimacing with effort, eventually pulling it over his head. The red shirt comes off with it. Chris, shirtless and wearing a Sonichu medallion, repositions himself on the chair. He smiles a creepy, forced smile.

==Long.mp4==

The webcam is positioned below Chris's testicles. They are shaved, as is his entire pubic area. Chris strokes his erect penis with his left hand, and seems to use his middle and ring finger to do most of the work. His index finger appears to be pressing into his middle finger to provide extra force. This is oddly similar to how he holds a pencil.

Chris's manboobs jut out from his body alarmingly at this angle, like tiny mountains. Chris looks off camera, presumably at the computer monitor.

(This file is included in the .zip downloadable [http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?hmxmygbkjo4 here])

==Jizz.flv==

Chris strokes his erect penis with his right hand. His flabby torso and disproportionately large nipples are the only other things in the frame. His skin is an odd, inhuman tone, much like the inside of a McDonald's french fry viewed under fluorescent lighting. This is possibly due to a glow from a computer monitor, or some kind of unholy aura Chris emits while ejaculating.

A [[Fapcup]] appears. Chris positions it below the head of his penis. Chris's [[Dirty crapped briefs]] come into the frame. They are gray with filth, although no actual fecal matter is visible. Chris begins ejaculating and catching his semen in the small cup, which appears to be slightly wider than the head of his penis. Chris lets go of his penis. His glans appears to be swollen to the size of a chicken egg, possibly due to the penile fracture that put a bend in his penis, or his retarded death-grip, or both. Either way, it is out of [[Giant Penis Comic|proportion]] to the shaft.

Chris appears to fumble with the cup off camera. His penis is in full view, limply resting against his briefs but still apparently engorged. An orange object flashes past.

Chris leaves the frame to do [[Recycling|who knows what]].

(This file is included in the .zip downloadable [http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?hmxmygbkjo4 here])

== See also ==
*[[Chris Sex Logs]]

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?hmxmygbkjo4 Video files]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Chris Chan Update 24 September 2008]]|nextlink=[[We're Being Watched]]|}}
[[Category:Leaked videos]]

14 Branchland Court

2010-01-28T01:06:10Z

Pugs Malone: /* Visiting */

{{Honest}}
[[Image:Fullfrontalfilth.gif|thumb|right|The most complete view of the front. Note the [[Sonichu]] drawn in the snow.]]
[[Image:CWCHouse.jpg|thumb|right|Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.]]
[[Image:Chris house.jpg|thumb|right|Aerial shot of <s>Baghdad</s> <s>the Chandler residence</s> ideal coordinates for a nuclear strike.]]
[[Image:BranchlandCourt.jpg|thumb|right|A more awesome (and badass, and more accurate) depiction of 14 Branchland Court]]
'''14 Branchland Court''' is the domain of the [[Chandler]] clan. It is a white (now yellowed to ivory) two-story house trimmed in [[homo|pink]] (faded from a dark red) with three bedrooms on the outskirts of [[Ruckersville, VA]]. The property is near the intersection of Branchland Court and Westwood Drive, facing northwest. The house itself reeks of the early 1980s, having tacky fake shutters and vinyl siding; it probably hasn't been re-sided in years. As a result of its dated look, in addition to the decaying gardens and overgrown yard, it has done a number on local property values.

As of [[2009#March|March 2009]], all space not used for walking or sleeping appears to be packed full of junk. However, in earlier pictures (those of [[Chris]]'s 20th birthday, for instance), the house was once quite tidy. In his [[Tour of Christian's House|video tour]], Chris also keeps referring to the fact that "things got cluttered," suggesting that the house has grown fuller and fuller in the past decade. "Clutter" is, of course, a horrible understatement. The house is packed with shit; the former living room is unusable, with junk filling the entire space and reaching within two feet of the ceiling. Similarly, other rooms are full of junk, but rather than solid blocks of shit, there are small crevices with chairs, TVs, and other furnishings.

[[THAT IS MY HOUSE]] has revealed that Chris's parents are aware of the house's condition (what with the junk being both a health hazard and a fire hazard), and are fearing that [[Tour of Christian's House|Chris's video tours]] may elicit the attention of the [http://www.vdh.state.va.us/LHD/ThomasJefferson/Greene/ Health Department of Greene County] (Email them!) resulting in their home being condemned. Due to several calls, an official investigation is being launched in conjunction with Social Services by the Health Department of Greene County.

==The Tour==
{{main|Tour of Chris's House}}

In two videos uploaded on [[2009#March|27 March 2009]], Chris provides a tour of his house and the property that it's on. Like his own room, Chris's entire house is a [[fail|disaster area]]. Several rooms are so full of shit that Chris cannot enter them.

What follows is a brief description of the rooms and other areas of 14 Branchland Court.

==First floor==
In the north corner is what Christian describes as "the music room," which is now primarily the domain of [[Barbara Chandler]], who frequently sleeps there. A small bathroom is directly in front of the stairs leading up to the front door. On the other end of a short hallway is the utility room, in which the family keeps a refrigerator in addition to the usual washer and dryer. The family room (possibly in the west corner) has been claimed by [[Bob Chandler]], who apparently sleeps there as well. If Chris's parents ever had, or used, dedicated bedrooms in the house, they have yet to be filmed.

==Second floor==
[[Image:411-CWCWeekP5 crop 2.jpg|thumb|right|[[Barbara]] moving Chris's earthly possessions from [[Richmond]] back to the living room in [[April 2000]]. The junk was already amassing.]]

[[Chris's room]] is in the northern corner of the second floor. Across the hallway, near the eastern corner, is a filthy bathroom, which apparently has not been cleaned in years, as implied by the dark brown or green mold growing in the shower and the peeling of the veneer on the cabinetry. The kitchen and dining area are apparently near the southern corner and southwestern wall. The computer Chris uses for Internet access seems to be in this part of the house, as well as a Christmas tree left up year-round. Tellingly, Chris has actually photographed himself with [[Officer Nasty]] and [[sex toys|dildos]] in the kitchen, and has even [[mass debating|mass debated]] over a webcam feed. This implies that Snorlax and Bob never actually leave the areas in which they sleep and spend their days there, leaving Chris free to do [[sex tape|whatever he wants]]. The living room, packed with boxes and shit, is across the stairway from Chris's room.

==Yard==
On first examination, you'd be forgiven for mistaking Chris's yard for Silent Hill. It consists of some simple crossed wood planters near the curb and some small shrubs and trees out front. The plants in the planters have long since [[Chris and death|died]], probably due to a [[Dirty crapped briefs|foul stench]] poisoning the air. The backyard contains a shed, and a small platform leading to a back entrance. The shed is full of shit, most notably a car, and was once the place where the [[Robert Chandler|Lumberjack]] would tinker with machines. After that, there are some trees and the pen where [[Patti]] once played. Her doghouse still stands, and she is buried nearby. At some point, a tree branch fell on the grave. Being the pansy-ass he is, Chris cannot muster the strength to pick the damn thing up. Some have speculated that this is [[GodJesus|divine intervention]], in order to keep Patti's body safe from Chris and his [[Rule 34|fur-fag]] tendencies.

However, in earlier pictures (when Chris was less huge and he had yet to start the [[fuck quest]]), we can see that the yard used to be quite lush and beautiful, with a variety of flowers planted around the area, the grass clipped, and healthy trees. Many people speculate that over the years Chris's parents have gotten too ugly or too lazy to care for their garden leaving the area quite barren.

==Mail==
{{quote|Hand-Written and Hand-Drawn Submissions are also accepted, ONLY addressed to: Christian Weston Chandler 14 Branchland Ct. Ruckersville, VA 22968. ALL letters addressed to any NAME other than "Christian Weston Chandler" or "Christopher Weston Chandler", will be Immediately disposed of with Paper Recyling, or be "Returned to Sender" with a frown face on it. ALL Visually Grotesque, Shocking and Offensive art works and letters will be disposed of properly as well. |Chris on contacting him, [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/CWCipedia:Copyrights CWCipedia]}}

If you would like to send a letter to Christian, or perhaps mail his parents some of the many [[nudes|NOODZ]] he has posted on the internets in recent times, you can contact him at:

:''Christian Weston Chandler,''
:''14 Branchland Court,''
:''Ruckersville,''
:''VA 22968-9545,''
:''United States of America''

'''NOTE:'''
:Based on previous experience with mail, it is likely that one of two things will happen to the letter should you choose to send it: 1) It will be intercepted by Chris, who apparently takes his parents' mail on a regular basis, or 2) Barbara and Bob will receive it, and dismiss it as old news (reports show that they have read some of the letters and ignored them).

Chris will respond to fan mail, provided there's a return address on the envelope.

==Visiting==
Visits of 14 Branchland Court, at least until Chris inherits the house and promptly trades the deed to a troll for some magic beans so said troll can found the ''Christian Weston Chandler Museum of Fail,'' are ill-advised. While a troll who does manage to make it to the front door will probably not be assaulted by Chris, they will most likely face Chris as he calls for his elderly parents to fight his battle or perform a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]].

To date, Chris has extended personalized invitations to [[Clyde Cash]], [[Liquid Chris]], and the staff of [[Asperchu#Asperpedia|Asperpedia]] to come to his house, so that he might [[Death threats|kill them]]. To date none of them have taken him up on his offer. Chris claimed in the [[DPF phonecall]] that his house was once egged by trolls.

==Chris and his address==
Giving away one's home address on the internet is generally considered unwise. Possibly Chris doesn't realize this, or perhaps he realizes that [[trolls]] have so thoroughly and permanently violated his privacy that attempting to preserve it is a lost cause. In any case, he has publicly announced his home address on a number of occasions, in YouTube videos and elsewhere.

* Shortly after 21 July 2009, when [[CChanSonichuCWC]] released a video promoting his Sonichu merchandise, Chris posted his address in a YouTube comment in hopes of a physical confrontation with the "impostor."
* On 14 August 2009, in the video [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!]], Chris rattled off his address as a way of attempting to prove his identity.
* He did the same thing in his [[CWC Public Disclaimer]], also released on 14 August 2009.
* On 23 November 2009, in the [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|Sonichu Presentation]], Chris provided his address (as well as his home and mobile phone numbers) in hopes of attracting investment in his comic-book characters.
* Chris has published his address on his websites at various times. It's currently available at the bottom of the main page on [[CWCipedia]].

==See also==
*[[Chris's room]]
*[[Ruckersville, VA]]
*[[Charlottesville, VA]]
*[[Tour of Christian's House]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=meAO487S0zM Resident Chris-chan 2: Homecomeuppance (I hope this isn't Chris's blood!)]

Other famous hoarders...

*[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Collyer_brothers The Collyer Brothers] (Infamous NY hoarders who ended up being crushed to death by their own shit)
*[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edmund_Trebus Edmund Trebus] (Eccentric Polish immigrant who ended up being a TV star because of his hoarding)

{{Places}}

[[Category:Places]]

Chris and copyright

2010-01-27T15:51:48Z

Pugs Malone: /* Use of copyright notices */

[[Image:SonichuCertificate.jpg|thumb|Chris's copyright registration certificate]]
{{Quote|...anyone using my characters and all Without My Consent are Criminals, and such people should be reported to the Police immediately.|[[Chris]]|[[CWCipedia]]'s Copyright page}}

Like with many things, [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a very obscure idea of what '''copyright''' entails. He believes that all copyrighting something involves is [[CWC - Hand Drawn Original|<nowiki>[putting]</nowiki> a little C-In-A-Circle and <nowiki>[his]</nowiki> John Hancock]].

Chris doesn't even know what a copyright ''is,'' legally speaking. He can't ''copyright'' [[Sonichu]], but he could '''trademark''' Sonichu. He could copyright individual works using Sonichu. Too bad he doesn't know anything about anything.

== Sonichu as a copyrightable work ==
[[Image:116-CWCCop.jpg|thumb|right|180px|Crooks!]]
In Chris's mind, it's perfectly reasonable to take two very popular fictitious characters and mash them both together in a [[Fail|failtastic]] [[rainbow]] of [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|incestous]] [[Sonichu|electric]] [[Rosechu|rodents]]. This means you've created a completely new thing, and therefore are entitled to the rights of said "Original Characters" regardless of how crappy, ''un''original and disgusting they may be.

Here in real life, however, any work that uses ''previously copyrighted work'' as a basis is a derivative work; this means that while it can be copyrighted by the creator, it cannot be published without permission of the original copyright holders. There are very specific exceptions to this rule. One way to avoid this is to simply not use too much of the previous work's material to begin with: complete works or significant portions of them are copyrightable, but you ''can'' steal general vague ideas as much as you want (and Chris is stealing way too much to qualify for this). Another would be Fair Use: use the copyrighted work to provide criticism, journalistic or educational information, or parody (of which more later). In short, Chris has no excuse.

Moreover, any attempt to argue that Sonichu is not a derivative work would be entirely self-demolishing. Sonichu is ''explicitly'' stated to be a fusion of two existing characters, both by Chris as its creator and in the comic story itself. Chris has worked the fact that the two original characters were merged into Sonichu's backstory and the Sonichuverse in general. His process of incorporating copyrighted properties into his works is both ''unabashed'' and ''deep-rooted''. He ''can't'' talk his way out of this.

Apparently, the idea of Sonichu being a publishable work stems way back into the character's creation. According to [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile|Chris's]] [[Sonichu (character)|"autobiography"]], when Chris ended up backed into a corner as to what to put onto a CD cover, he decided to fuse Sonic and Pikachu, whom he couldn't use because of they were copyrighted characters, and turn them into Sonichu. When his teacher accepted the portmanteau character, Chris automatically assumed that he was free to create his multimedia empire from them. In [[Father Call|call with Kacey's father]], he also says his father said he had been in the clear with the beginning as far as copyright is concerned.

So let's remember that Chris is so [[naive]] that he would treat the advice of his high-school teacher as if it were the law of the land.

== Chris as an enforcer of rights ==
[[Image:117-CWCSonichuLeer.jpg|thumb|right|Don't look right into their eyes.]]
Chris is very paranoid regarding his copyright, and will frequently [[CWC Public Disclaimer|hand out all of his personal information to complete strangers]] if he thinks it is being contested. This has backfired in a plethora of astounding ways.

Chris has encouraged people to report copyright infringements to the police. The police, unfortunately, can't do much when random citizens report ''civil offenses'' such as copyright infringement. Even if Chris ''had'' the rights to the works in question, suing people for copyright infringement would be Chris's job and his job alone, or that of a representative whom he has specifically appointed to that specific task.

Unsurprisingly, Chris is a total and complete hypocrite when it comes to abusing the work of other creators. In the span of nine issues, Chris pulls characters and concepts from numerous franchises and even goes so far as to steal "original" characters from [[trolls|fans]] and [[sweethearts]] without an ounce of due respect to their creators. It's easy to say that, if Chris were to make money off Sonichu ''somehow'', he could easily be sued by those who created the characters he stole.

Even worse, Chris refuses to listen to anyone, especially the original creators of his "original" characters, when they know Chris has done wrong. The best example would be the ever-continuing fight between [[Evan]] and Chris over the character [[Simonla]]. When Evan demanded that Chris remove Simonla from the comics in an on-screen death, Chris refused because ''it would take Wild Sonichu's girlfriend away''. That's right: Chris refuses to remove a character because of a meaningless throw-away relationship between minor characters.

===Copyright registration===
It appears that Chris has actually paid $45, and somehow got [http://cocatalog.loc.gov/cgi-bin/Pwebrecon.cgi?v1=1&ti=1,1&Search%5FArg=Sonichu&Search%5FCode=TALL&CNT=10&PID=ZvDUHHsi-vkzrRWQU2p5oLpU7yxe&SEQ=20091106120549&SID=1 Sonichu approved by The United States Copyright Office]. In 12 November 2009, he also posted a scan of the confirmation letter he received to [[CWCipedia]] and posted a highly predictable [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|my-heart-level-just-went-to-100%-again video]].

Psychologically, this copyright registration represents a big win for Chris, because it gives him what he thinks are bragging rights ''even'' though he has no idea what the copyright registration ''actually'' means. In his confused state, receiving a registration from the US Copyright Office means that he has been right the whole time and now he ''officially'' has all imaginable intellectual property rights regarding his character and creations. In his mind, he now has the right and the power to tell everybody how Sonichu may or may not be used. The most annoying thing about this is that unless Chris actually sues someone or someone sues Chris, we can't make him shut up about it - the state of intellectual property legislation is such that people can make all sorts of weird assertions ("I patented forks and knives ''when used over the Internet''"), and if someone's wrong, that is up for the courts to settle.

Now, here in reality, copyright registration is not an official ''recognition'' of copyright. It is an officially registered ''assertion'' that a person or company has created a specific work at specific date. Every new work automatically has copyright whether it's registered or not. The registration of copyright is only required if you're suing people for copyright infringement. One party asserts that a work has been created at one time, another party has used the work at another time, and then it's up to a judge to decide who is in the right. If Nintendo or Sega sues Chris, they can easily demonstrate that they've held the rights to original characters like Sonic and Pikachu and Chris's work is derivative. More important, Chris does ''not'' have a trademark on Sonichu; he has never had it, and this registration doesn't have anything to do with trademark rights.

We know Chris messed the registration up, but the sad thing is that without complete documentation of exactly what he submitted, we may never know exactly ''how'' badly Chris messed this up. The documentation Chris published doesn't show exactly what he submitted. The application appears to be for "digital files", which is probably to say specific image files, created in 2000. (We'd need actual documents, because Chris will probably say that he has ''official'' copyright on a ''character'' he created in 2000 and babble some more confused nonsense.) It's also possible that he has submitted files that ''weren't'' created in 2000, and he's just insisting that the ''character'' was created at that time. These kinds of distinctions and little details can be extremely important in court of law.

'''IN SHORT:''' Chris's copyright registration doesn't mean his comics are non-infringing.

=== Use of copyright notices ===
The way he maintains his so-called copyrights within his works is also baffling. It's possible Chris goes by the assumption that almost everything he draws must contain copious amounts of copyright notices, usually in the form of this disclaimer, written in large cursive any third-grader would be embarrassed to maintain (pity any poor bank employee who must look at his checks);

{{quote|© Christian Weston Chandler, March 2000-????}}

However, only '''daily''' newspaper comic strips have constant notices reminding about copyright due to their daily nature, and usually these notices are edited out of strip compilation books for basic aesthetic purposes. In most forms of media throughout the world, one copyright notice at the beginning of the work is enough to assert rights, and only the year is noted in a copyright notice. However the way his copyrights are drawn, they are not in the traditional 'mouse type' which is unobtrusive to most readers, but in large written letters which distract incredibly from his work.

Finally, the year of the creation of a certain work, not the year it was created, is what should be noted in the copyright; for example [[Sonichu 10]] should be "''© 2009-2010 CWC''" (abbreviations are allowed in notices), '''not''' the example listed above. Going by this, if a copyright lawyer was hired by Chris in an attempt to maintain his copyrights, it would be questioned and likely Chris would lose his case because the date of copyright and release were conflicting and incorrect.

Chris also obsessively includes copyright symbols in pictures he draws of Sonichu, including a picture he drew in the snow in his [[Holiday Greetings]] video and a doodle he drew on his ticket to the 2005 [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] convention.

===Chris's motivations===
Chris doesn't really understand what his copyright registration means and what it might or might not be good for, practically speaking. To him, it's mainly just a crutch for his ego. In the aftermath of his feud with [[Liquid Chris]], he sees it as the final and clinching proof that he himself is the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of Sonichu. On 26 November 2009, he posted the following as part of an announcement on [[CWCipedia]], which is quite illuminating:

{{quotebox|Also, I have been thinking, although all Sonichu "Merchandise" sold online in the past I have labeled false; I did that, because it came as a surprise to me then, I felt outraged appropriately (most everyone can relate to that; it's comparable to if Godzilla or Clover came to YOUR Metropolis and suddenly attacked your city). I realize now that even though it is still considerably Not Official, it all still is an homage to my creation. So I will make it clear to ALL those Vendors.

As long as it is NOT printed copies of my books' pages, or bootlegged copies of my "Christian Weston Chandler, Yep, I'm On T.V." DVD, AND As Long As I am quoted on ALL websites' and vendors' locations as Original Creator of Sonichu, Rosechu, Cwcville and all of such, I, Christian Weston Chandler, approve of such merchandise from Day Forward. At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera and such.

I have spoken, and I wish everyone a Safe and Happy Thanksgiving.

--ChrisChanSonichu 02:17, 26 November 2009 (CET) }}

Translated from the jackass, he's saying that he doesn't actually understand or care about the legal and economic ramifications of other people using his supposed intellectual property, so long as he's the one that gets the credit, not some impostor in brown stripes. Money isn't as important to him as his precious e-fame.

==Chris's views==
{{main|Parody}}
Chris is VERY protective of his characters. Well, as protective as an autistic manchild could be to such unoriginal monstrosities. Chris believes that his characters are officially parodies, thus, he is allowed to create his multimedia empire on a legal loophole. What Chris fails to realize that is that parodies are essentially just mockeries of something they're based on, done for laughs or as a commentary on the original work.

Some examples: [[Wikipedia:"Weird Al" Yankovic|"Weird Al" Yankovic's]] songs are considered parodies; note, however, that he obtains permission from artists whose songs he covers, going through the necessary legal process to make his work. He also does his own work, including pastiche of artists' styles, and impressively so, with a Devo frontman commenting that Weird Al's [[Transformers|"Dare to Be Stupid"]] encompassed his entire body of works in one gag tune. It's a known fact that Yankovic actually has one of the tightest, most competent legal team in music to make sure his parodies don't get him in legal trouble down the road. [[Wikipedia:Mel Brooks|Mel Brooks's]] works are considered parodies, but his most famous parodies either use works from the public domain (such as ''Young Frankenstein,'' based on the novel and done in the ''style of'' classic Frankenstein films) or cover similar plot points without actually lifting characters. Likewise, the creators of another famous parody, ''Airplane!'', acquired the rights to a film they were very closely parodying so there would be no legal trouble. Works that "parody" scenes by copying them verbatim, like ''Scary Movie'' or [[Family Guy|a certain animated sitcom]], are usually looked down upon for simply relying on [[Random Access Humor|constant references]] in lieu of actually parodying the original work.

Sonichu and Rosechu are ''not'' parodies, just shitty recolors. As mentioned on the "parody" page, Chris doesn't mean to make fun of the characters they're based on, he slavishly imitates the kind of adventures they have in an attempt to tell his own stories. The stories he makes aren't commentaries on the style or message or story of Sonic or Pokémon; he simply lifts elements and characters wholesale in lieu of creating his own world. Even his most original characters are either based on [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|someone he knows]] or [[Flame the Sunbird|are cribbed extensively from existing characters]]. He might be able to claim a trademark on Flame the Sunbird, of all characters, because he's merely relentlessly derivative as opposed to stolen wholesale. The non-Chris-Chan core of the comics, though, most certainly cannot.

Regardless of how much claim he's ''really'' entitled to, Chris will make a great deal of noise about protecting his work when he feels it is being threatened. Whenever he finds his work being used elsewhere without his permission, he ends up demanding that the offending work be taken down within 14 days or he will pursue legal action, sometimes accompanied by a picture of Chris and Sonichu glaring at the offender as if they can actually ''do'' something. Thus far, there is no evidence of Chris actually pursuing legal action against anyone.

With the use of Sonichu, the Chaotic Combo and Chris himself in the [[Asperchu]] comics, Chris has used a brand new method to get his characters away from others - by [[death threats]].

== See also ==

*[[CChanSonichuCWC]]
*[[Jimmy Hill]]
*[[Parody]]
*[[Asperchu]]

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Chris and copyright

2010-01-27T15:49:21Z

Pugs Malone: /* Use of copyright notices */

[[Image:SonichuCertificate.jpg|thumb|Chris's copyright registration certificate]]
{{Quote|...anyone using my characters and all Without My Consent are Criminals, and such people should be reported to the Police immediately.|[[Chris]]|[[CWCipedia]]'s Copyright page}}

Like with many things, [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has a very obscure idea of what '''copyright''' entails. He believes that all copyrighting something involves is [[CWC - Hand Drawn Original|<nowiki>[putting]</nowiki> a little C-In-A-Circle and <nowiki>[his]</nowiki> John Hancock]].

Chris doesn't even know what a copyright ''is,'' legally speaking. He can't ''copyright'' [[Sonichu]], but he could '''trademark''' Sonichu. He could copyright individual works using Sonichu. Too bad he doesn't know anything about anything.

== Sonichu as a copyrightable work ==
[[Image:116-CWCCop.jpg|thumb|right|180px|Crooks!]]
In Chris's mind, it's perfectly reasonable to take two very popular fictitious characters and mash them both together in a [[Fail|failtastic]] [[rainbow]] of [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|incestous]] [[Sonichu|electric]] [[Rosechu|rodents]]. This means you've created a completely new thing, and therefore are entitled to the rights of said "Original Characters" regardless of how crappy, ''un''original and disgusting they may be.

Here in real life, however, any work that uses ''previously copyrighted work'' as a basis is a derivative work; this means that while it can be copyrighted by the creator, it cannot be published without permission of the original copyright holders. There are very specific exceptions to this rule. One way to avoid this is to simply not use too much of the previous work's material to begin with: complete works or significant portions of them are copyrightable, but you ''can'' steal general vague ideas as much as you want (and Chris is stealing way too much to qualify for this). Another would be Fair Use: use the copyrighted work to provide criticism, journalistic or educational information, or parody (of which more later). In short, Chris has no excuse.

Moreover, any attempt to argue that Sonichu is not a derivative work would be entirely self-demolishing. Sonichu is ''explicitly'' stated to be a fusion of two existing characters, both by Chris as its creator and in the comic story itself. Chris has worked the fact that the two original characters were merged into Sonichu's backstory and the Sonichuverse in general. His process of incorporating copyrighted properties into his works is both ''unabashed'' and ''deep-rooted''. He ''can't'' talk his way out of this.

Apparently, the idea of Sonichu being a publishable work stems way back into the character's creation. According to [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile|Chris's]] [[Sonichu (character)|"autobiography"]], when Chris ended up backed into a corner as to what to put onto a CD cover, he decided to fuse Sonic and Pikachu, whom he couldn't use because of they were copyrighted characters, and turn them into Sonichu. When his teacher accepted the portmanteau character, Chris automatically assumed that he was free to create his multimedia empire from them. In [[Father Call|call with Kacey's father]], he also says his father said he had been in the clear with the beginning as far as copyright is concerned.

So let's remember that Chris is so [[naive]] that he would treat the advice of his high-school teacher as if it were the law of the land.

== Chris as an enforcer of rights ==
[[Image:117-CWCSonichuLeer.jpg|thumb|right|Don't look right into their eyes.]]
Chris is very paranoid regarding his copyright, and will frequently [[CWC Public Disclaimer|hand out all of his personal information to complete strangers]] if he thinks it is being contested. This has backfired in a plethora of astounding ways.

Chris has encouraged people to report copyright infringements to the police. The police, unfortunately, can't do much when random citizens report ''civil offenses'' such as copyright infringement. Even if Chris ''had'' the rights to the works in question, suing people for copyright infringement would be Chris's job and his job alone, or that of a representative whom he has specifically appointed to that specific task.

Unsurprisingly, Chris is a total and complete hypocrite when it comes to abusing the work of other creators. In the span of nine issues, Chris pulls characters and concepts from numerous franchises and even goes so far as to steal "original" characters from [[trolls|fans]] and [[sweethearts]] without an ounce of due respect to their creators. It's easy to say that, if Chris were to make money off Sonichu ''somehow'', he could easily be sued by those who created the characters he stole.

Even worse, Chris refuses to listen to anyone, especially the original creators of his "original" characters, when they know Chris has done wrong. The best example would be the ever-continuing fight between [[Evan]] and Chris over the character [[Simonla]]. When Evan demanded that Chris remove Simonla from the comics in an on-screen death, Chris refused because ''it would take Wild Sonichu's girlfriend away''. That's right: Chris refuses to remove a character because of a meaningless throw-away relationship between minor characters.

===Copyright registration===
It appears that Chris has actually paid $45, and somehow got [http://cocatalog.loc.gov/cgi-bin/Pwebrecon.cgi?v1=1&ti=1,1&Search%5FArg=Sonichu&Search%5FCode=TALL&CNT=10&PID=ZvDUHHsi-vkzrRWQU2p5oLpU7yxe&SEQ=20091106120549&SID=1 Sonichu approved by The United States Copyright Office]. In 12 November 2009, he also posted a scan of the confirmation letter he received to [[CWCipedia]] and posted a highly predictable [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|my-heart-level-just-went-to-100%-again video]].

Psychologically, this copyright registration represents a big win for Chris, because it gives him what he thinks are bragging rights ''even'' though he has no idea what the copyright registration ''actually'' means. In his confused state, receiving a registration from the US Copyright Office means that he has been right the whole time and now he ''officially'' has all imaginable intellectual property rights regarding his character and creations. In his mind, he now has the right and the power to tell everybody how Sonichu may or may not be used. The most annoying thing about this is that unless Chris actually sues someone or someone sues Chris, we can't make him shut up about it - the state of intellectual property legislation is such that people can make all sorts of weird assertions ("I patented forks and knives ''when used over the Internet''"), and if someone's wrong, that is up for the courts to settle.

Now, here in reality, copyright registration is not an official ''recognition'' of copyright. It is an officially registered ''assertion'' that a person or company has created a specific work at specific date. Every new work automatically has copyright whether it's registered or not. The registration of copyright is only required if you're suing people for copyright infringement. One party asserts that a work has been created at one time, another party has used the work at another time, and then it's up to a judge to decide who is in the right. If Nintendo or Sega sues Chris, they can easily demonstrate that they've held the rights to original characters like Sonic and Pikachu and Chris's work is derivative. More important, Chris does ''not'' have a trademark on Sonichu; he has never had it, and this registration doesn't have anything to do with trademark rights.

We know Chris messed the registration up, but the sad thing is that without complete documentation of exactly what he submitted, we may never know exactly ''how'' badly Chris messed this up. The documentation Chris published doesn't show exactly what he submitted. The application appears to be for "digital files", which is probably to say specific image files, created in 2000. (We'd need actual documents, because Chris will probably say that he has ''official'' copyright on a ''character'' he created in 2000 and babble some more confused nonsense.) It's also possible that he has submitted files that ''weren't'' created in 2000, and he's just insisting that the ''character'' was created at that time. These kinds of distinctions and little details can be extremely important in court of law.

'''IN SHORT:''' Chris's copyright registration doesn't mean his comics are non-infringing.

=== Use of copyright notices ===
The way he maintains his so-called copyrights within his works is also baffling. It's possible Chris goes by the assumption that almost everything he draws must contain copious amounts of copyright notices, usually in the form of this disclaimer, written in large cursive any third-grader would be embarrassed to maintain (pity any poor bank employee who must look at his checks);

{{quote|© Christian Weston Chandler, March 2000-????}}

However, only '''daily''' newspaper comic strips have constant notices reminding about copyright due to their daily nature, and usually these notices are edited out of strip compilation books for basic aesthetic purposes. In most forms of media throughout the world, one copyright notice at the beginning of the work is enough to assert rights, and only the year is noted in a copyright notice. However the way his copyrights are drawn, they are not in the traditional 'mouse type' which is unobtrusive to most readers, but in large written letters which distract incredibly from his work.

Finally, the year of the creation of a certain work, not the year it was created, is what should be noted in the copyright; for example [[Sonichu 10]] should be "''© 2009-2010 CWC''" (abbreviations are allowed in notices), '''not''' the example listed above. Going by this, if a copyright lawyer was hired by Chris in an attempt to maintain his copyrights, it would be questioned and likely Chris would lose his case because the date of copyright and release were conflicting and incorrect.

Chris also obsessively includes copyright symbols in pictures he draws of Sonichu, including a picture he drew in the snow in his [[Holiday Greetings]] video.

===Chris's motivations===
Chris doesn't really understand what his copyright registration means and what it might or might not be good for, practically speaking. To him, it's mainly just a crutch for his ego. In the aftermath of his feud with [[Liquid Chris]], he sees it as the final and clinching proof that he himself is the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of Sonichu. On 26 November 2009, he posted the following as part of an announcement on [[CWCipedia]], which is quite illuminating:

{{quotebox|Also, I have been thinking, although all Sonichu "Merchandise" sold online in the past I have labeled false; I did that, because it came as a surprise to me then, I felt outraged appropriately (most everyone can relate to that; it's comparable to if Godzilla or Clover came to YOUR Metropolis and suddenly attacked your city). I realize now that even though it is still considerably Not Official, it all still is an homage to my creation. So I will make it clear to ALL those Vendors.

As long as it is NOT printed copies of my books' pages, or bootlegged copies of my "Christian Weston Chandler, Yep, I'm On T.V." DVD, AND As Long As I am quoted on ALL websites' and vendors' locations as Original Creator of Sonichu, Rosechu, Cwcville and all of such, I, Christian Weston Chandler, approve of such merchandise from Day Forward. At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera and such.

I have spoken, and I wish everyone a Safe and Happy Thanksgiving.

--ChrisChanSonichu 02:17, 26 November 2009 (CET) }}

Translated from the jackass, he's saying that he doesn't actually understand or care about the legal and economic ramifications of other people using his supposed intellectual property, so long as he's the one that gets the credit, not some impostor in brown stripes. Money isn't as important to him as his precious e-fame.

==Chris's views==
{{main|Parody}}
Chris is VERY protective of his characters. Well, as protective as an autistic manchild could be to such unoriginal monstrosities. Chris believes that his characters are officially parodies, thus, he is allowed to create his multimedia empire on a legal loophole. What Chris fails to realize that is that parodies are essentially just mockeries of something they're based on, done for laughs or as a commentary on the original work.

Some examples: [[Wikipedia:"Weird Al" Yankovic|"Weird Al" Yankovic's]] songs are considered parodies; note, however, that he obtains permission from artists whose songs he covers, going through the necessary legal process to make his work. He also does his own work, including pastiche of artists' styles, and impressively so, with a Devo frontman commenting that Weird Al's [[Transformers|"Dare to Be Stupid"]] encompassed his entire body of works in one gag tune. It's a known fact that Yankovic actually has one of the tightest, most competent legal team in music to make sure his parodies don't get him in legal trouble down the road. [[Wikipedia:Mel Brooks|Mel Brooks's]] works are considered parodies, but his most famous parodies either use works from the public domain (such as ''Young Frankenstein,'' based on the novel and done in the ''style of'' classic Frankenstein films) or cover similar plot points without actually lifting characters. Likewise, the creators of another famous parody, ''Airplane!'', acquired the rights to a film they were very closely parodying so there would be no legal trouble. Works that "parody" scenes by copying them verbatim, like ''Scary Movie'' or [[Family Guy|a certain animated sitcom]], are usually looked down upon for simply relying on [[Random Access Humor|constant references]] in lieu of actually parodying the original work.

Sonichu and Rosechu are ''not'' parodies, just shitty recolors. As mentioned on the "parody" page, Chris doesn't mean to make fun of the characters they're based on, he slavishly imitates the kind of adventures they have in an attempt to tell his own stories. The stories he makes aren't commentaries on the style or message or story of Sonic or Pokémon; he simply lifts elements and characters wholesale in lieu of creating his own world. Even his most original characters are either based on [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|someone he knows]] or [[Flame the Sunbird|are cribbed extensively from existing characters]]. He might be able to claim a trademark on Flame the Sunbird, of all characters, because he's merely relentlessly derivative as opposed to stolen wholesale. The non-Chris-Chan core of the comics, though, most certainly cannot.

Regardless of how much claim he's ''really'' entitled to, Chris will make a great deal of noise about protecting his work when he feels it is being threatened. Whenever he finds his work being used elsewhere without his permission, he ends up demanding that the offending work be taken down within 14 days or he will pursue legal action, sometimes accompanied by a picture of Chris and Sonichu glaring at the offender as if they can actually ''do'' something. Thus far, there is no evidence of Chris actually pursuing legal action against anyone.

With the use of Sonichu, the Chaotic Combo and Chris himself in the [[Asperchu]] comics, Chris has used a brand new method to get his characters away from others - by [[death threats]].

== See also ==

*[[CChanSonichuCWC]]
*[[Jimmy Hill]]
*[[Parody]]
*[[Asperchu]]

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Wendy's

2010-01-26T19:06:37Z

Pugs Malone:

[[Image:Wendy's logo.png|120px|center]]
[[Image:Chris Wendy's.jpg|thumb|250px|The branch of Wendy's at which Chris worked.]]

[[Wendy's]] (or "'''Wendys'''", according to [[Chris]]) is an American fast food chain that employed Chris briefly until he got his [[Obesity|fat]] [[autism|HFA-ass]] fired. Chris' job primarily consisted of custodial duties instead of preparing food. Chris has contradicted himself about when he worked there; he claimed in his [[Chris's resume|resume]] that he worked there from August to October [[2001]], but he told [[Father Call|Kacey's father]] that he had already been fired before September 11, 2001.

The mysterious circumstances of his firing have never been revealed, as Chris has never given a clear or concise answer on the cause of his dismissal from Wendy's. It's been alleged that Chris helped a small child cut open a [[Wikipedia:baked potato|baked potato]] and/or was doing his [[Donald Duck impersonation|Donald Duck impressions]]. In Mumble,{{cite}} Chris said that it was because he was trying to get napkins for a small child (it's unclear if this was the sole reason or he was clarifying the "fan"'s question of if he was helping a small child cut his baked potato) and on his date from 19 [[March 2009]], when asked if his Donald [[Duck]] impersonation had scared the child (it sounds like something out of ''The Exorcist''), he said that the child was "tired" at the time.{{cite}} In a conversation with Kacey's father Chris mentioned "emotional differences" as the reason for his termination and claimed the manager had a "spike on his shoulder" against him. At this time it is unknown what these differences were, although they were almost certainly minor differences of opinion over punctuality and performing the job duties for which he was hired.

Chris was asked about his time at Wendy's several times after the date in March, and during that he brought up more information, particularly regarding his supervisor, who didn't think very highly of him for reasons upon which we can only speculate. He mentioned a time involving him getting his uniform dirty and simply continuing to wear it, [[Chris_and_health#Hygiene|not taking into account the usual sanitation standards]] of most fast food restaurants and also not realizing he could get another, clean shirt. Chris made many other, probably small but frequent mistakes and likely failed to actually do his job. The supervisor, allegedly, used the child incident to finally fire Chris, who wasn't actually notified in advance of his firing and came to work only to be told by his former co-workers that he wasn't supposed to be there.

If true, then it was a petty reason to fire a person, but because the firee in question is a sexist, racist, opinionated, socially retarded, homophobic, smelly freak like Chris, we can find their reasons totally rational. (Fun Fact: Dave Thomas was quite the homophobe as well)

==See also==
* [[Cutco]] - Chris's only other employer.
* [[Chris's resume]]

==External links==
* [http://maps.google.co.uk/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&q=&vps=9&jsv=151e&sll=38.231303,-78.37095&sspn=0.005158,0.019312&ie=UTF8&geocode=FYRbRwIdkChU-w&split=0 Google Maps Location]

{{Places}}

[[Category:Places]]
[[Category:Jobs]]

Chris and race

2010-01-26T15:59:33Z

Pugs Malone: /* Parental influence */

[[Image:GrandWizards4Sonichu.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris approves as he attends a [[Gay4Sonichu|Klansmen 4 Sonichu]] meetup]]

[[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s '''racist tendencies''' can be traced at least partially to his southern heritage, but certain other factors seem to imply that the rest of his worldview on race comes from stereotypes depicted by popular culture. In some cases, however, Chris seems to be completely unfamiliar with even the stereotypes, opting to make up a bunch of bullshit off the top of his head.

==African Americans==
[[Image:Nodarkies.JPG|thumb|Chris said he liked this pic.]]
{{main|Niggos}}

Chris demonstrates many instances of intolerance and racism, both intentional and unintentional. His racism comes from several sources: his father, his isolated formative years, television, and his complete ignorance of everything that isn't him. Black people, in particular, are a common target for his xenophobia, hence the word "niggo".

==Asians==
In the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]], Chris portrays [[Punchy]] as a kung-fu master with slanty eyes. While in a mailbag, he was called out on this and retorts by denying that he's Asian.
Outside of the comic, Chris also misattributes the origin of kung-fu to Japan, when in actuality it came from [[China]]. He does a racist impression of a Chinese person, claims Japanese and Chinese people sound the same, and expresses dislike for the Chinese, as shown in [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]]. Later, he backpedaled and says he has no problem with the Chinese while being interrogated in [[Mumble 9]].

[[Manajerks|"Turdijerk"]] from "Off-Target" has a vaguely South Asian appearance and the name may also be based on a stereotype of an Indian accent.

[[Image:ChingChong.jpg|thumb|The only known image of "Ching Chong".]]
==='''Ching Chong'''===
In the [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]], Chris present us [[Chris and remorse|sincere apologies]] for having scared a small Chinese girl that [[Ivy]] tutored in art. The child, known only as '''Ching Chong''' is now traumatized due to her witnessing a video of Chris drinking his own [[semen|"Navy"]] while innocently browsing [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. Chris never made a follow-up on the girl and never asked why her name was a known racial slur towards ethnic Asian communities. In the [[Wedding Comic]], Ching Chong is seen [[List of Sonichu characters#Ching Chong|as a flower girl]].

==Native Americans==
{{main|Cherokian Clan}}
[[Image:02-Cheroki-Chan Card2.jpg|thumb|left| This has something to do with Native Americans. No, really.]]
As stated in the main article, despite claiming to have at least one [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Cherokee ancestor]], Chris is completely ignorant of Native American culture. However, unlike other minorities, Chris's opinions and representation of native are a misguided expression of "pride" for his "heritage".

In [[Sonichu 2]]: [[Sonichu 2#Episode 7: Sonichu in "Anchuent Prophecy"|Episode 7]], Chris tries to tie in his "Cherokeeian" heritage with Sonichu lore. He depicts Cherokee characters in his work as white and wearing gold armor ([[Wikipedia:Joseph Smith|Joseph Smith]] would be proud). The actions and spirituality of the Native Americans in his comic have almost no resemblance to any actual people that ever existed.

Chris has also embodied his ignorance of Native American culture in a physical form. For a brief time, Chris blurred his gender roles and began to collect and customize "[[My Little Pony]]" dolls. One of the dolls he crafted was the infamous Cheroki-Chan, a Native American pony. While there is nothing overtly racist about this abomination, it is probably not how Native Americans want to be represented. In the end Cheroki-Chan is just another Mary-Sue for Chris, and pales in comparison to Chris's most infamous portrayal of Native Americans.

In a shocking display of ignorance, Chris attempted to emulate what he perceives as "Native American culture" in a [[War Paint Video]]. In this video Chris wears water washable paint (and a "[[muscle bra]]") and wields a gun in an attempt to frighten trolls into submission. Instead, it served to illustrate his outrageous insensitivity and callowness.

==Jews==
{{main|Christmas}}

In [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas]], Chris describes how Jews living in [[CWCville]] celebrate Hannukah. On December 12 members of the CWCville Jewish diaspora set up "Menorah candles" (the "Haunaka" Menorah candelabrum has 7 candles in it, while the traditional Menorah used on Hanukkah IRL has 9) instead of Christmas Trees, with dreidels lying under them. Since the candle-related symbolism is very much present in the RL Hanukkah rituals, it's in good taste to give CWCville Jews anything candle-related as a gift. E.g., when Sonichu's daughter Cerah Rosey baked cookies for her friends, she decided to make her Jewish friend Kevin a candle-shaped one. Because Jews surely love to be distinguished from other people on any occasions based solely on their faith, and would take deep offense in receiving a normal nothing-special-shaped cookie as a gift!

The interesting moment is that there actually is a tradition of eating specially baked foods on Hanukkah, and vanilla is one of the allowed ingredients used in making them. Not that Chris knows anything about this, mind you.

==Hispanics==
[[Image:332-Espanolic.jpg|thumb|left|Espanolic, the Spanish Pokemon]]

Aside from his rather tenuous grasp on [[Ricardo Weston Chandler|the]] [[Hotel Ricky Ricardo|Spanish]] [[CWC's Pokésite 2|language]], Chris has created a somewhat racist caricature in the form of [[List of cards from The Wall of Originals|Espanolic]]. It's a grass-type [[Pokemon]] that resembles an anthropomorphized sombrero, and its main attack is confusing its enemies with its "strange language". Its evolved form, Vegaton, has an attack called "Spanish Fly", that puts its enemies to sleep.

Hilariously enough, [[Nintendo]] would later create a similar Pokemon named Ludicolo.

==Parental influence==
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|left|Bob telling Chris the Barack Obama joke.]]

Given that his father [[Bob Chandler]] grew up in the southern United States before the civil rights movement, it is very easy to assume that Bob harbors racist beliefs and has passed at least some of them on to Chris. It is possible Bob also disliked that Chris's high school basketball team had only three white players and the two [[Wikipedia:waterboy|waterboys]] were both white. This line of reasoning was cemented in 2008 when Chris began referring to his father saying that, if elected president, [[Barack Obama]] would "paint the White House black."

==Chris and stereotypes==
Chris's views of cultures besides southern white Christians can also be traced to the television he watches. The typical Adult Swim cartoon includes gratuitous use of stereotype-based humor. Chris takes [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|The Boondocks]]' satire of black stereotypes at face value. He also portrays nearly every person of African descent that appears in Sonichu with bald heads and either [[wikipedia:Golliwogg|round, bulging eyes]] or glasses that resemble such. Finally, he does an impression of the stereotypical black accent, which he apparently confuses with the Jamaican accent, in [[Mumble 4]].

His exposure to anime fuels his misguided views on East Asians. Asians, in his views, [[Excel Saga|excel at]] [[random-access humor]] and [[Punchy|martial arts]].

Chris, despite claiming Cherokee ancestry, doesn't seem to know what a Native American even looks like, as he portrays the [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] as an overtly European person wearing Greco-Roman garb. He also tramples all over their actual rituals and culture simply to implement the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] into his comic.

==Not a racist?==
[[Image:ECP_00024.jpg|thumb|Chris is a '''wiggo'''.]]

Chris does not want to be considered a racist. He claims to respect blacks as equals, saying that in CWCville [[Fail|"they can even vote"]], but at best he merely tolerates their existence so long as they stay away from him. Or if they can [[Reggie Fils-Aimé|help him get his inane and idiotic video game made]]. However, he does genuinely like two black people: [[My big 18th party (story)|Kenan & Kel]].

Also, Chris has probably never been told that the voice of [[Sonic]] in the animated series that he loves so much was Jaleel White (AKA Steve Urkel), a black man. If someone told him this, he would probably deny it. However, given that Chris managed to get [[LittleBigPlanet|respect]] for [[Homos|Stephen Fry]]...

He did mention more than once that the reason he doesn't want black girls (but any other race is okay) is because he thinks God told him that his future daughter Crystal must be white, too. (In an [[IRC (17 December 2008)|IRC]], Chris said he has no problem with dating an Asian. Later, in [[Mailbag 35]] he wrote he would date "Asian, Native or Hispanic women, as well as women of all other countries" except the ones being black because he's "Old Fashioned".)

Realistically, Chris is not considered a white supremacist type of racist but more of a xenophobic one. In other words, he's afraid of ethnic groups he's not familiar with. Like most things in his life, [[Chris and reality|Chris has no real knowledge and bases everything off of what he's seen on TV]]. Chris' perception of minorities is only what the TV shows him, since encountering them in real life is something that rarely occurs.

===Improved race relations?===
[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|Chris does not judge a woman by the color of her skin but by the size of her tits.]]

An image leaked on 26 [[September 2009]] showing Chris having sex with three young ladies, including an African American woman. In the [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|Captain's Log of 10 October 2009]], Chris clarified that the woman with whom he's performing sexual intercourse is "Half And Half" (mixed ancestry). This proves to us that, even if he's ready to touch the [[china|genitals]] of a black woman, he is unable to imagine the sexual intercourse with someone not sharing white ancestry. In fact, there's evidence that [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(sister)|shared ancestry may be a turn-on for Chris.]]

It seems that the futility of his [[love quest]] has lead Chris to lower his ridiculously high standards even further, as he did with fat chicks (which he dropped for [[Sarah Jackson]]), and red heads (as he did with [[Ivy]]).

==Minority characters in Sonichu==
*[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Kevin]] (Jewish, good)
*[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] (Native American, lawful good)
*[[B-Manajerk]] (black, evil)
*[[Barack Obama]] (very black)
*[[Blake]] (black, evil turned good)
*[[CADD Chef]] (black, evil)
*[[Florance Fisher]] (black, good)
*[[Jerkhief]] (black, lawful evil)
*[[Punchy]] (Chinese-Japanese, good)
*[[Silvana]] (black, evil [will turn good])
*[[Turdijerk]] (unclear, drawn with tan skin, evil)

==References==
<references/>
{{Chris and}}
[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Ruckersville, VA

2010-01-25T19:06:33Z

Pugs Malone: /* Geography */

'''Ruckersville, Virginia''' is the home of the creature known as [[Christian Weston Chandler]] and the centre of all things [[Sonichu]] ([[Twin Falling Towers|Ground Zero]], if you will). Chris and his family moved from Ruckersville to the Richmond suburbs after their dispute with the faculty of [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], only to return several years later.

{| class="wikitable collapsible collapsed" align="right" border="1"
! CWC ON LOCATION
|-
| Photo:
| [[Image:Ruckersville Aerial Map.jpg|thumb]]
|-
| Location:
| Ruckersville, VA
|-
| Coordinates:
| 38°13′59″N 78°22′09″W
|-
| Classification:
| Unincorporated Township
|-
| Date established:
| 1732
|-
| Population:
| 9,935
|-
| Zip/post code:
| 22968
|-
| Area code:
| 434
|-
| Website:
| Unavailable
|-
| Also known as:
| Fuckersville
|-
| Produces:
| Retarded Manchildren
|-
| Current relevance:
| Chris's Hometown
|}

==The Brochure==
Ruckersville, Virginia is a small, unincorporated township on the outskirts of [[Charlottesville, VA]]. A scenic, tight-knit community that offers panoramic views of mountains, trees and farmland. Although though Ruckersville has a small population, it has a vibrant and growing downtown, notable for it's antiques market, new Wal-Mart and with great potential for expansion. Founded in 1732, little has changed. The quiet, peaceful village of long ago is still the quiet, peaceful township of today. A safe, friendly, and welcoming community in which to raise a family or [[Bob Chandler|quietly retire]].

==The Truth==
[[Image:Ruckersville Attractions.png|thumb|/this article]]

It's a redneck shithole full of cheap, ugly houses and even uglier lawn furniture. A place where people burn their trash and decorate their yards with junked cars, the human disasters we know as the "[[Chandlers]]" can go ignored and unnoticed. Ruckersville has very little in the way of recognizable landmarks, history, and the only noteworthy person born there is NASCAR driver Phillip Morris (but who gives a shit about NASCAR?) While most normal young people would resent being stuck in a redneck wonderland like Ruckersville, the lack of prospects or opportunities suits Chris, as it's just one more excuse to never leave his room.

==Geography==
The geography of Ruckersville is rather plain, composed mainly of fields, light forest, and small ugly housing developments extending from the larger town of Charlottesville. Even the terrain is fucking boring. Ruckersville really is a place for people [[Christian Weston Chandler|who prefer to do absolutely nothing with their lives at all]].

==Crime==
Crime rates in Ruckersville are unexpectedly low, with zero murders and only two rapes on [[Chris and sex|record]]. This is surprising when you consider that the only legal forms of entertainment are shopping at Wal-Mart and (according to [http://virginia.hometownlocator.com/va/greene/ruckersville.cfm this website]) [[Mass Debating|bird watching]]. That said, nearby Charlottesville is the regional heart of commerce and entertainment. If Chris is more than happy to waltz over there to [[Chris and the Law|commit his various misdemeanors]], likely so are most others.

==Culture==

==Ground Zero==
It's interesting to note that a ''Google Street View'' of the housing development that contains Chris's home is unavailable. Some theories exist to explain this, the leading being that the bizarre cocktail of smells produced by bathing in [[Chris and health|Axe body spray and intense body odor]] may have simply driven the Google camera car away from that street after the drivers deemed it "too risky." An alternative theory is that the road is so poorly marked and difficult to access, that nobody gave a fuck about driving down it.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Ruckersville_Aerial_Map.jpg|Aerial shot of the redneck shithole that is Ruckersville. Chris' home is highlighted with the red mark.
Image:Goin_to_Ruckersville.jpg|Ruckersville lies at the intersection of two major highways. WOW!
Image:Ruckersville_Church.jpg|No redneck town is complete without churches and replaceable letter signs.
Image:Story_of_Ruckersville.jpg|Little did Peter Rucker know that his settlement would be a haven for a retarded manchild... and that it would blow goats.
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[14 Branchland Court]]
*[[Charlottesville, VA]]
*[[Chris's room]]

==External links==
*[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ruckersville,_Virginia Wikipedia article]

{{Places}}
[[Category:Places]]

Rosechu

2010-01-25T03:55:44Z

Pugs Malone: /* Transgenderism */

[[Image:Rosechu_Original.jpg|right|thumb||She has a God-given vagina, uterus, and pair of Almighty ovaries.]]
[[Image:Rosedong.jpg|right|thumb||[[BILLY MAYS|BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!]]]]

''This article is about Chris's eponymous female [[fail]] OC. For the general species of female fail OCs, see [[Rosechu (species)]]''

'''Rosechu''' (pronounced "roe-se-chew") is the second electric hedgehog Pokemon created by [[Christian Weston Chandler|Christian]], and the girlfriend of [[Sonichu]]. As the primary female character in the Sonichu universe, she represents Chris's ideal woman. Rosechu's interests include kissing Sonichu, shopping, gossiping, sucking Sonichu's cock, posting nude photos of herself to the internet to uphold her reputation, and stripping for [[Women's rights]]. Chris will occasionally have Rosechu refer to him as "father" (or more likely "papa"), just like Sonichu, implying the two are caught up in an [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|incestuous affair]].

Rosechu is extremely defensive about rumors that she has a [[pickles|penis]].

==Development==

{{quote|Pink electric hedgehog Pokemon. The original cutie. She is Sonichu’s girlfriend. Even though she can’t run as fast as Sonichu, she still can zap up some power when in danger.|Rosechu's background, [http://sonichuandrosechu.com/SchusNews2.htm Sonichu's News Dash #2]}}

Christian's primary interests are [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], [[Pokemon]], and [[Sex|scoring]] [[china|pussy]]. Having first created Sonichu, it was inevitable that he would then turn to fashioning a girlfriend for his creation, based predominantly on [[Amy Rose]], with minor elements from [[Raichu]] added. Whereas the Sonic/Amy relationship is deliberately one-sided to create some small sense of drama, Christian prides himself on the fact that Sonichu and Rosechu have absolutely no sexual tension or any complications in their romance at all.

Intentionally or not, the entire Sonichu/Rosechu relationship serves as Christian's model for how he presumes he will interact with his eventual sweetheart. Sonichu's attraction to Rosechu is based entirely on a single wayward glance. He makes no effort to win her affection, and indeed he does not need to as Rosechu falls for him simply because he exists. They are rarely out of one another's sight, and all of their time together is spent kissing, snuggling, or screwing. Christian does not depict Rosechu as an unequal partner in the relationship, but since she has almost no purpose or existence outside of her association with Sonichu the character essentially becomes an [[Fapcup|object]] for Sonichu to periodically [[Semen|come]] inside.

As [[trolls]] discovered Chris's weak spot for fan art of Rosechu with a penis, Christian responded with increasing attempts to prove Rosechu's femininity, drawing her less like the cartoonish Amy Rose and with greater attention to her breasts, hips, legs, panties, and [[China|cameltoe]]. This drive to assert Rosechu's sexuality, along with Chris's inevitable sexual attraction to his own character, probably contributed to Rosechu's increasing prominence in the comics. [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] is almost entirely about her, to the point of Rosechu demonstrating powers far superior to her boyfriend.

==Sexism==

{{quote|She is not just a sex object; she is an individual with her own feelings, aspirations and opinions.|Chris, [[Mailbag 10#The incredible vanishing email|explaining how he sees Rosechu as a sex object]]}}

Since Chris knows virtually nothing about actual women, he has no frame of reference for Rosechu's characterization, beyond qualities that make her a perfect mate in his eyes. Beyond her relationship with Sonichu and her defiance of [[4-cent_garbage.com]], Chris can only have Rosechu do stereotypical female activities. She enjoys "shopping" for no other reason than Chris having deemed this as a compulsory feminine quality, as well as having long "girly chats" that can last for hours - as seen with the character of Amy Rose. Despite all of the shopping she does, she always wears the same outfit in public (when she isn't making porn for women's rights).

Her only other hobbies seem to include lounging in fields of flowers, and getting kidnapped and constantly needing her man Sonichu to save her.

==Transgenderism==
[[Image:TheTailofRosechu.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's edited "proof" of Rosechu's sex.]][[Image:TheREALTailofRosechu.jpg|thumb|right|But, as always, it's all a lie.]]On 12 January 2010, Chris received [[Mailbag 39#Rosechu the transwoman|a letter from a fan]] complimenting his portrayal of Rosechu as a transwoman. The Raichu which would become Rosechu had a defined pointy tip on its tail, which, as of the fourth generation of the Pokemon video game series, is characteristic of the male of the species (whereas the females have a flattened tail tip). Rather than explaining that he had created the character before this sexual characteristic existed in the game art, Chris's reaction was to freak out in capslock and in [[12 January 2010#Part 2|a video uploaded later that night]].

Chris received [[Mailbag 42#It was just a girl that had all the physical characteristics of a boy|two]] [[Mailbag 44#On Rosechu's man-parts|more]] letters about Rosechu's originally male nature before freaking out. He threw together a collage in, declaring that it proved beyond the shadow of a doubt that Rosechu was a girl. Unfortunately for Chris, one of these images has Rosechu so far off in the distance that it's impossible to see anything, and the other one has the most important part of her tail off-frame.

In [[Mailbag 45]], one mailer pointed out the real page unedited. It showed that not only did Chris erase the tips in his collage, he hid the third and final panel of the Raichu because her tail there was out in the open, obviously unflattened. This could end in either deletion or tard rage, but retconning is inevitable.

Whether the Raichu in question had a pointed tail (male), or a dented tail (female), it's all pointless seeing that Rosechu's tail is that of a male's. At no point has Chris tried to defend himself by pointing out that gender differences between Pokemon didn't exist until well after [[Sonichu 0]] was published.

==Marriage==
[[Image:AfterTheHoneyMoon.jpg|thumb|right|Rosechu's marriage with Sonichu hasn't been as idyllic as she always imagined...]]
Rosechu married Sonichu in a top secret ceremony at Samuel Memorial United Christian Church on March 17, 2006<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu#Sonichu_and_Rosechu_from_1998_to_Today CWCipedia article on Sonichu]</ref>. Despite living and sleeping together openly, the two lovebirds saw fit to keep their union out of the spotlight by wearing their rings under their gloves. Rosechu quickly set to work fulfilling her sole creator-given biological function (aside from designated sperm-dumpster) as a [[Sonee & Rosey]] factory. As of 2009 the couple have [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|three hidden children]], abandoned to their [[Heather Iglesias|put-upon yet attractive hispanic lesbian nanny]]. This is presumably so the grown-ups can continue their important day-jobs of appearing to not be married with children in Chris's comics.

Rosechu "volunteered on her own sound decision to have her tubes tied," <ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu#4-Cent_Garbage CWCipedia article on Sonichu]</ref> which Chris seems to believe is a reversible procedure (it is generally permanent; reversal attempts have varying levels of success). Rosechu does this despite the fact that it would presumably be easier for Sonichu to get a vasectomy and much easier for Sonichu just to wear a damn condom, as both characters have espoused in fake PSAs within the comic. The fact that being sterilized is Rosechu's responsibility rather than her husband's illustrates Chris's self-centered views on masculinity, responsibility, and the woman's role in a marriage.

==Religion==

She appears to hold [[Chris and religion|Christian beliefs]], reminding Sonichu that instead of [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|using violence]] or [[CWC is Angry|getting angry]] with his foes, he should remember the story of Joseph and "forgive".

Rosechu quickly forgets this lesson, attacking workers in a building only minutes later for daring to imply that she might not be a female. Not very forgiving yourself Rosechu, are we?

She also commits attempted murder shortly afterward, savagely assaulting [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] not only for the crime of creating a [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|satire website]] about her creator - but for throwing a pickle at her. At this point, Joseph's story of Forgiveness goes straight out the window. Proving her [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocrisy]] yet again, Rosechu face-rapes Jason and tears his scalp open before electrocuting his head, leaving him convulsing in a pool of blood<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_8/Page_46 Sonichu 8]</ref>.

==Campaigner==
Despite the sexism evident, Rosechu is a long-term campaigner for [[Women's rights]].

Rosechu has also been known to complain about the "dumb" child pornography laws <ref>[[Sonichu 7]]</ref>, voicing [[Pedofork|Chris' not-so-subtle wish that they be overturned so he can do fifteen year olds]].

Rosechu, the perfect role model for Chris-Chan's young female audience.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:229-ACRchu.jpg
Image:230-ACRchuBck.jpg
Image:234-RchuCard1.jpg
Image:235-RchuCard2.jpg
Image:236-RchuCard3.jpg
Image:237-YuRosechu.jpg
Image:239-RchuWink.jpg
Image:241-DolledRchu.jpg
Image:242-RosechuStyle.jpg
Image:512-RosechuAtPacSun.JPG|Originally believed to be [[DJ Jamsta]], it turns out this is Rosechu.
Image:A_pickle.jpg|NOT PHOTOSHOPPED!
Image:238-RosechuPose.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==Sauce==
<references/>

==See also:==
{{Fan art}}
*[[Rosechu (species)]]
*[[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children]]
*[[CWCville#Zapbud|Zapbud]], a flower Rosechu lieks.
*[[Pickle]], a vegetable Rosechu is [[Silvana|implied to have]].
{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Characters]]

Things Chris has ripped off

2010-01-21T21:03:45Z

Pugs Malone: /* Ren and Stimpy */

'''''Attention! This page is under construction! What you see now is a preview of the things to come. You are free to add anything you think is relevant, it will be taken into consideration when the revamping will be finished. For discussion, critique and more info, please see the [[Talk:Things Chris has ripped off|talk page]]. Thank you.'''''

{{Quote|I take it one moment at a time and let the story pieces come to me. Even if they are sometimes borrowed from a tv show or movie.|Chris, [[Mailbag 4#Admission of plagiarism|blatantly admitting to plagiarism]].}}
[[Image:090-CWComicalHug.jpg|thumb|ORIGINAL!]]
As every Chris-chan's [[troll|fan]] is probably aware of, [[Chris-chan|our autistic hero]] has quite the imagination. But some argue that due to [[stress]] and the mental block that is [[autism]], his powerful and mighty artistic ordeals cannot come to fruition. So he just does what every good TV/book/movie writer does: he goes and steals shit from other places.

Now, to his credit, stealing ain't easy. I mean, how the hell do you grab something that comes from another person's mind, adapt it to your own storyline and make it so that it fits in, without having whatever it is that you stole stand out like an obese retard with a red and blue striped T-shirt in the middle of a crowd? Being the [[Fail|geinus]] comic book creator that he is, he does not need to bother with details such as a good plot, readability, or even consistency. Just stick in a few [[random-access humor|random-access-humor]] jokes and you got yourselves a new installment in the "[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu Comic Book Series]]." Not resembling ''[[Family Guy]]'' at all, right, guys?

According to Chrissy, stealing copyrighted material is fine, as long as you indicate that whatever it is you’re doing is a parody of the original material. In accordance to U.S. copyright law, this is technically true, so this probably means that, unless he decides to make money out of his "artwork," he ain’t gonna have the law knocking on his door. Besides, we all know he is never going to sell any type of merchandise ever, or even [[Monthly tugboat|make a hard earned buck]] for that matter.

Onward with the list of shit he's stolen:

==Main influences==

===Sonic the Hedgehog===
* His pride and glory "[[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]," which, as we all know, is a recolor of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] and [[Pikachu]]. In his comic book debut he is created when the "[[Perfect Chaos Monster]]" attacks CWCville, which, by the way, is a direct ripoff from the Sonic series.
*His other pride and glory “[[Rosechu (character)|Rosechu]]” which is in turn another recolor from the character “[[Amy Rose|Amy]]” from the “Sonic the Hedgehog” cartoon series.
*Of course, Sonichu’s evil twin brother “[[Blake]]” also comes from the same line of original creativity Chris has got us accustomed to. This [[niggos|nigger]] version of Sonichu is a complete rip-off from the character “Shadow the Hedgehog”. His creation is partially inspired from the "Pokemon" movie in which the character “Mewtwo” is created from the DNA from “Mew” with an evil twist.
* The “Chaotic Combo” is a mesh of ''Sonic'' characters recolored with retarded deformities. Like Angelic being a white hedgehog that has wings, or Punchy Sonichu being an AZN version of “Knuckles the Echidna”.
''For more info, see the [[Sonic the Hedgehog#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Pokemon===
* Like the previously mentioned Sonichu and Rosechu characters ripping off Sonic the Hedgehog, they also rip off various [[Pokemon]], mostly Pikachus and Raichus, combined with other Pokemon-types.
* The character [[Jiggliami]] is a humanoid variation of a Jigglypuff.
* The so-called [[Sonichu Balls]] are designed off of various Pokeballs, though they also function like other items.
''For more info, see the [[Pokemon#Plagiarism|main article]].''

==Anime==

===Digimon===
{{incomplete}}
*[[Silvana|Silvana's]] origin is very similar to Gatomon's, as both were long separated from their kind and raised by evil villains who made them into their minions. The only difference being that Silvana was given a [[Pickle|penis]].

===Dragonball/Z/GT===
* [[Chris-chan Sonichu]]'s famed attack, the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] (later Shin-ye-ha-me-ha), is based off of the famed super attack known as the Kamehameha.
* The Sonichu Balls, though resembling Pokeballs, are said to function more like the titular Dragonballs, as they are able to grant a wish when all are brought together.
* Ultra Sonichu, which shares an amazing resemblance to super saiyan warriors, you know, flying sky high and kicking ass and all.

===Excel Saga===
* A veritable hellstorm of shameless rips from this series appear in the Sonichu comics, in a way nearly as pervasive as Pokemon and Sonic the Hedgehog, yet comparatively subtler because he steals one-liners and monologues more than characters or storylines.
* ...although he does indeed steal characters (like Mypoe and Nabeshin and [[Bagget|the Jerkop Daitenzen]]) from time to time.
''For more info, see the [[Excel Saga#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Gurren Lagann===
{{incomplete}}

*The character of [[Simonla Rosechu]] is a ripoff of a "fanmade" Sonichu named Simonchu who, in turn, is ripped off from the main character of the series, Simon the Digger.

===Inuyasha===
* In [[Issue 2]], Sarah's Sonichu form pins Wes's Sonichu form to a tree, Wes making the statement "Where did this non-sacred tree come from?" This is a "hilarious gag" is referring to Inuyasha's origin story, wherein he was pinned by an arrow to a cursed tree by priestess/crack shot/vengeful ex-girlfriend Kikyo. Also, with some imagination and enough alcohol, one can see that a cloud in the background in one of the panels is shaped vaguely like Inuyasha's head.

===Pretty Cure===
{{quote|"This is so "Pretty Cure"! I'M BACK!"|[[Chris-chan Sonichu]], [[Sonichu #4]]}}

*Pretty Cure, unlike [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], is a true [[parody]] that purposefully spoofs the ridiculous costumes, magical schoolgirls, and attack names of other anime series. The [[Chrs-Chan_Pure_Pulse-Jolt_Lance|Chris-Chan Pure Pulse Jolt Lance]] (the attack that [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] and [[Crystalina Rosechu]] are able to perform with their combined [[fail|Hedgehog]] powers) is stolen from this series, and even though it's original counterpart was given a ridiculous name, Chris felt the need to make it sound like some idiot had just mashed some random words into an attack name for his own version. Oh wait...

*Also noteworthy is that Chris copied (and butchered) the pre-attack catch phases and attack poses. (Most of these rip-offs occur in [[Sonichu #4]] and [[Sonichu #5]])

===Puni Puni Poemy===
{{incomplete}}

===Sailor Moon===
* [[Sailor Megtune]], Chris's hideously inappropriate SI Mary Sue for [[Megan]], is based off of the various heroines from the series, though the name is based off of Sailor Neptune.
* The [[Dark Mirror Hole]] may be a reference to a number of related Sailor Moon places/items, including the Black Dream Hole of the Sailor Moon Super S movie (the actual place), and a mirror-like item from Sailor Moon Stars
''For more info, see the [[Sailor Moon#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Yu-Gi-Oh!===
* [[Sarah Hammer]]'s husband-to-be is depicted as Jack's Knight, a Yu-Gi-Oh! monster, because Chris had no idea what the groom looked like and didn't bother to check. Way to go!
* Chris tends to use various Yu-Gi-Oh terms during his battles ("Trap cards"? Seriously?) and is even depicted using a Duel Disk when dealing with [[Wes Iseli]].
''For more info, see the [[Yu-Gi-Oh!#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Yuu Yuu Hakusho===
* In [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction]], Chris mentions the use of a "Curse Shot", fired in the same way main character Yuusuke Urameshi would fire his main attack, the Rei Gun.

===GTO: Great Teacher Onizuka===
* In [[Mailbag 43]], Chris describes in great detail how he would keep the character [[Simonla]] away from [[Evan]], then he proclaims that this was because of his "GDC", or "Great Director Chandler", powers

==Western Animation==

===The Adventures of The American Rabbit===
* There Chris ripped many concepts for his [[Love Quest]] and lines from that movie are used in the comics ("Thanks, I will father" from the cover [[Sonichu 0]] is a line uttered by Robert Rabbit).
''For more info, see the [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Aqua Teen Hunger Force===
{{incomplete}}
''For more info, see the [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Beavis and Butt-head===
*Beavis and Butt-head appear in the Time Travel episode in a gag directly stolen from the original cartoon series (although Chris [[Chris and copyright|said "Sorry"]] to Mike Judge).
''For more info, see the [[Beavis and Butt-head#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Darkwing Duck===
* [[Darkbind Sonichu]] is a partial ripoff of this series' main character – Darkwing Duck.
* The font Chris uses to write "Darkbind" is traced from the show's logo.
* Upon arriving, Darkbind recites a completely bastardised version of Darkwing Duck's trademark entrance speeches. The main change is that the original speeches were filled with tongue-in-cheek irony, while Chris's version is completely serious and unnecessarily pompous.
* Chris calls Darkbind "D.B.", reminiscent of how Darkwing Duck's sidekick Launchpad McQuack calls him "D.W."
* [[Princess Zelina Rosechu]] may be a partial ripoff of Darkwing Duck's girlfriend Morgana McCawber (though this theory is debatable).

===Ed, Edd and Eddy===
*In one of his [[ED]] edits, Chris added a huge wall of [[Random-access humor]], including a joke from the episode [http://www.tv.com/ed-edd-n-eddy/one-plus-one-equals-ed/episode/117706/summary.html "One Plus One Equals Ed"]: "Carrots are good for your eyes, can it dial a phone?", originally said by Ed.

===Family Guy===
* In [[Sonichu 7|Issue 7]], Chris meets [[Sammy]], who resembles Peter Griffin, whom goes through a series of incidents involving a sequence from Filmation's [[Ghostbusters]].
''For more info, see the [[Family Guy#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Ghostbusters (Filmation's)===
* Chris's Family-Guy-style gag rips from The Non-Real Ghostbusters created by Filmation.
''For more info, see the [[Ghostbusters#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===He-Man===
*[[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.5 (preview)]]: [[Beel]] exclaims: "I have the power!" after stealing Chris's [[Medallion of Fail]].

===Home Movies===
*[[Officer Keino]]'s appearance is ripped straight from Coach McGuirk.
*The end of the [[Giant Penis Comic]] special contains gags from the show.

===Inspector Gadget===
*[[Darkbind Sonichu]]'s nemesis, [[Clawdorf]], is (possibly) based on Inspector Gadget's nemesis Dr.Claw, who was also most of the time seen as a dark silhouette. If it's true, it is especially strange, as [[Darkbind]] is based on Darkwing Duck, not Inspector Gadget.

===Peanuts===
[[Image:119-PeanutsCWC.jpg|thumb|left|Need I say more?]]

===Ren and Stimpy===
*Sub-episode 6 rips off the Ren & Stimpy Episode "Lair of the Lummox," which Chris even acknowledges (with Ren & Stimpy thinly veiled as "Ben & Stumpy")

*At the end of episode 17, there is an advert for "Knothole"; and boasted as being from the creators of "Log".

===Samurai Pizza Cats===
*In the aforementioned [[random-access humor]] [[ED]] edit, Chris quoted a joke from the US-dubbed version of SPC: "Quiet everybody, Emperor Fred has an announcement...FRED".

===Sealab 2021===
*In the same [[ED]] edit, Chris included a joke from the Sealab 2021 episode "Legend of Baggy Pants": "What? Pod six doesn't need a Pro Shop, they need a dentist.".

===Smurfs===
*[[Wild Sonichu]] seems to be "inspired" by the character of [http://smurfs.wikia.com/wiki/Wild_Smurf Wild Smurf]. Both live in treehouses. Both swing from vines (however, Wild Sonichu's vines swinging comes from ripping off of Spider-Man). Both were raised by wild animals. Honestly, the only difference between the two is that Wild Sonichu can actually talk (Wild Smurf communicated in chipmunk sounds more than anything else).

===South Park===
{{incomplete}}
''For more info, see the [[South Park#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Transformers===
* [[Optimus Prime]] mercilessly killing Decepticon spy [[Sarah Jackson]].
* Various Transformer-types are set to appear in [[Sonichu 9]] Episode 20.
''For more info, see the [[Transformers#Plagiarism|main article]].''

==Movies and TV Shows==

===Gilligan's Island===
* Thurston Howell III and his wife make an appearance in [[Sonichu 8]], hinting at the name of the head of [[4-Cent Garbage]].
{{incomplete}}

===Monty Python===
{{incomplete}}
*
*
*[[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.8]]: An impromptu "comedic" sequence making "fun" of [[Jimmy Hill]] starts with "And now for something completely different...", contains a collage of photos and drawings reminiscent of Terry Gilliam's artistic experiments, and features a porcupine shouting: "Dinsdale!".
''For more info, see the [[Monty Python#Plagiarism|main article]].''

===Pink Panther===
{{incomplete}}

===Spaceballs===
* In the [[Episode 8]] fight between [[Wes-Li Sonichu]] and [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], Chris-Chan Sonichu gets his tail singed by a fire blast then exclaims, "You burned my tail! Now it's personal!" before going on the offensive. This is very similar to the scene in the movie [[wikipedia:Spaceballs|"Spaceballs"]] where gun-hating Princess Vespa gets her hair singed by a laser in a firefight and exclaims, "You shot my hair! You son of a bitch!" then proceeds to singlehandedly mow down the attacking Spaceballs with a laser rifle.<ref>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYgQXWxJfZE#t=7m44s (''Relevant portion from 7:44 to 8:01'')</ref> While the words aren't identical, he reads the lines with the same cadence and inflection as Vespa's in his [[Sonichu_2_Official_Videobook#Episode_8|Official Videobook]] clip.<ref>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42EOCbTSJOI#t=8m06s (''Relevant portion from 8:06 to 8:12'')</ref>

===Troll 1 & 2===
{{incomplete}}

===Carrie===
* Chris's [[The High School Story]] is an amalgamation of Stephen King's Carrie, and Chris' own high school experience. Its main character, Terrah, is bullied and under appreciated, so she kills everyone with her psychic powers. It is safe to assume that Chris saw the movie adaptation of Carrie, and not the book, as it is unimaginable that Chris would ever spend his time on a book without illustrations.

===Power Rangers===
*In [[Sonichu 9]], the CWC-Power Rangers are introduced, but never seen with the sole exception of Kart Megazord.

===Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III===
*In page 28 of [[Sonichu 1]], Sonic is quoted saying "Eh... you were expecting maybe, Bugs Bunny?" a direct 'reference' to a line said by one of the non-yawning Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in the third movie. The original line was 'Eh... you were expecting maybe, The Addams Family?" It is ironic in this case that of all the lines Chris-Chan could have possibly chosen from the movie, he went ahead to choose one of the most awful, face-palming, gut-wrenchingly bad line, and proceeded to MAKE IT WORSE. Congratulations.

==Video Games==

===Banjo Kazooie===

*[[Flame]] the Sunbird is just a very poor drawing of Kazooie who seems to want pants for some reason that no rational person can fathom. Any who enjoyed this game can only thank [[Godjesus]] that Chris doesn't seem to realize that Kazooie is a [[gal-pal|girl]].

*In [[Sonichu 9]], [[Sonichu]]'s battle with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] is ripped directly from the final boss fight with Gruntilda. The only differences are that the fireballs are replaced with dark energy and Mary does not fall to her death.

===Legend Of Zelda===
{{incomplete}}
*The characters [[Darkbind Sonichu]] and [[Zelina Rosechu]] are rip-offs of Link and Zelda, the two main characters from the series, alongside being rip-offs of elements from the cartoon series Darkwing Duck, strangely enough.

*It's not clear if he's a fan of the series, since while he's compared one of his favorite games ([[Brutal Legend]]) to The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, it's likely he simply saw the game was the highest ranking game on GameRankings and other game scoring websites.

===Mobile Suit Gundam===
*During the [[Megan]] Saga, Chris drew box art for [[John's Custom Gundam: Sisterly Rescue]], one of Chris's many fake box arts for his imaginary games. What's unique about this one is that it involves Megan Schroeder and her brother, John. Despite being about Megan, it is not a rape simulator, but instead believed to be a ripoff of Mobile Suit Gundam: Journey to Jaburo.

===Street Fighter===
* [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]]'s attack "Hyper Beam" looks a lot like Ryu and Ken's special attack "Hadouken". It appears in:
:*
:*
:* [[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.7]]
*In [[Sonichu 9]], Sonichu performs a Flash Kick on Slaweel.
*In [[Sonichu Special 4]], [[Kacey]]'s father resembles Guile.

===Super Mario Bros===
{{incomplete}}
*While ripping off one of Nintendo's biggest franchises and having affinity for Shigeru Miyamato, Chris doesn't have much interest in the Super Mario series. Due to the lack of furry material, the games (at least the later ones) focus on puzzle solving and exploration and the fact at one time Mario was the rival of Sonic, that's not a surprise. However, the wing cap ability from Super Mario 64 was used in Sub-Episode 4.

==Western Comics==

===Spider-Man===
*[[Wild Sonichu]] is a partial ripoff of Spider-Man, a superhero who can shoot long web strings from his hands. He uses these web ropes to swing across the city and entangle his enemies. Also, the scene in the end of Episode 19 ([[Sonichu 9]]) is highly reminiscent of the Spider-Man movie.

===Superman===
{{incomplete}}

==List of fiction Chris has referenced and otherwise bastardised==
While Chris's [[Sonichu|masterpiece]] is chock full of shameless ripoffs and copyright infringements, there are some references to works of fiction which can't be actually considered "ripping off", but manage to ruin the franchise in question nevertheless, for the sole fact of being referenced in [[Sonichu]]. These are mostly instances of Chris either including a minor reference to a work of fiction, or just mentioning it, in his comics. While it's not considered a crime ''de jure'', it still may be called a crime against humanity, whose culture Chris has thusly bastardised.
''Note that when such minor references concern works or franchises already listed in the main ripoff list above, they're added there, not here. It was done so that it would be easier to see how much has Chris managed to bastardise each franchise.''
*'''[[Wikipedia:Batman|Batman]]:''' [[Sonichu 8#Episode 17|S8 Ep17 p.35]]: Batman's portrait is hanging on the wall of the [[CWCville Mayoral Office]] for some completely mysterious reason.
*'''[[Bugs Bunny]]:'''
:*[[Sonichu 1#Episode 6|S1 Ep6 p.28]]: [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] says to the startled [[Doctor Robotnik|Dr.Robotnik]]: "Eh... You were expecting, maybe Bugs Bunny?"
:*[[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.8]]: Bugs himself appears in the Monty Python-esque collage, lecturing the toothless photograph of [[Jimmy Hill]] (who was implied to have sold counterfeit Warner Bros. merchandise in the past) on the evils of [[Chris and copyright|copyright infringement]].
*'''[[Wikipedia:Dig Dug|Dig Dug]]:'''
:*[[Sonichu 9#Episode 19|S9 Ep19 p.12]]: [[Simonla]]'s screen name is "DigDugette416".
:*Later, on [[Sonichu 9#Episode 19|S9 Ep19 p.17]], [[Layla]] jokes that Simonla only needs a pump to "fully dig the dug", whatever that means.
*'''[[Wikipedia:Fight Club (film)|Fight Club]] and [[Wikipedia:Chuck Palahniuk|Chuck Palahniuk]]:'''
:*[[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2|S1 SE2 p.S-4]]: [[Hanna]] tells Chris that she likes reading books by "Chuck Pala[[duck]]" (sic), who is also (according to Chris's footnote) "[[Fail|the director]] of the movie "Fight Club" (well, maybe he believes that [[Wikipedia:David Fincher|David Fincher]] is just Chuck's alternate personality?)... Yes, "Chuck Pala'''[[duck]]'''".
:*If Chris has actually <strike>read the book</strike> seen the movie, it may be the influence behind [[30 August 2009|"Christopher"]].
*'''[[Wikipedia:Grand Theft Auto|Grand Theft Auto]]:''' [[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.1 (preview)]]: [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] orders: "[[Beel]]! Prepare for Grand Theft [[Medallion of Fail|Medal]]!"
*'''[[Guitar Hero]]:'''
{{incomplete}}
*'''[[LittleBigPlanet]]:''' [[Sonichu 10#Preview|S10 Ep21 p.1 (preview)]]: For no reason at all, Sackboy appears at the bottom of the page and recites an anti-pirate advertisement for "LittleBigPlanet" and Chris's [[LittleBigPlanet videos#Sonichu Episode 1 LittleBIGPlanet Level|Level of Fail]].
*'''[[R.L.Stine]]:'''
{{incomplete}}
*'''[[Sprung]]:''' [[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2|S1 SE2 p.S-5]]: Chris is shown playing "Sprung" on his [[Nintendo DS]] for dating tips before going on a date with [[Hanna]]. He reads the infamous "So, do angels have names?" compliment and notes that it "sounds right".
*'''[[Wikipedia:B-Daman|B-Daman]]:''' [[Sonichu 1#Episode6|S1 Ep6 p.32]]: Sonic curls up into a ball and enters a pocket of whatever in Sonichu's stomach, upon which Sonichu fires him out at Metal Sonichu which also is the form of a ball. At first, this looks like a reference to balls, but upon closer inspection, it seems to be a ripoff of the Japanese Anime and Toy series B-Daman, which involves small cute robot-like characters firing balls out of their stomachs at other balls.

==References==
<references />

==See also:==
*[[Chris and copyright]]

[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]
[[Category:Articles needing improvement]]

Homos

2010-01-21T02:52:45Z

Pugs Malone: /* Evidence that Chris is a homo */

{{quote|Homo males are objectionable, VERY objectionable (I hate them!)|Chris}}

[[Image:Homobad.jpg|thumb|'''STAY STRAIGHT!''']]

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] refers to '''homosexual people''' almost exclusively by the pejorative term "'''homos'''". He doesn't like them very much.

From the very beginning of his internet fame in [[2007]], his extreme opposition to homosexuality and his neurotic, obsessive demand that everyone [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"STAY STRAIGHT"]] have been the subject of many [[lulz]] and the target of many [[trolls]].

==Fear of being a homo==
[[Image:0067-Christian&Barbie.jpg|thumb|Chris tried to stay straight from an early age, by posing with Barbie.]]

{{quote|"Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."|Chris <ref>E-mail to Megan, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*:; Date: Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm</ref>}}

[[Image:What_Chris_thinks_he_looks_like.png|thumb|Chris shows his [[Rainbow|true colors]].]]
Chris's homophobia is just that: he is literally afraid of homosexuality and of anything that could conceivably cause a straight person to be "leered off the straight path." His terror is such that he can barely bring himself to even utter the word "gay" or any other term concerning gay people, except of course for "homo". He has said that he cannot even look at a picture of a [[pickle|penis]] without being "freaked out," and he has cited [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|several techniques]] he believes are necessary to maintain his sexual attraction to women. Chris is also convinced that chances of homosexuality are raised as a direct result of not engaging in heterosexual intercourse before maturation,<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Dating_Education</ref> his retarded [[Dating Education]] classes naturally being the reasonable solution to preventing people from becoming homos. His attitude could be explained by one of three possibilities:

# Chris is a heterosexual idiot, so he thinks the slightest thing could turn him gay unless he maintains constant vigilance.
# Chris is a repressed homosexual, so he ''knows'' the slightest thing could turn him gay, because he can barely resist the temptation.
# Chris is bisexual, yet his underdeveloped mind fails to grasp the fact that there's actually such a thing as male bisexuality, so he thinks that people really ''can'' choose their sexual preference, and that giving in to his feelings towards other males will automatically turn him gay.
# Chris is asexual, has no primal instincts attracting him to girls, so he must consciously go out of his way to stay straight and avoid becoming a homo.

We don't yet have enough information to determine which of these is true, and we won't until he kisses a man on the lips (currently scheduled for [[2010]]). Of course we have to consider (because Chris won't) the small point that anyone, gay or straight, man or [[China|woman]], white or [[Niggo|black]], would most likely rather clean their genitals with sandpaper than touch Chris.

==Hatred of homos==

Chris's animosity towards gay people seems to result primarily from his fear of them and their supposed ability/desire to make him gay (this, despite the fact that women are likely jealous of the fact that men don't have to worry about Chris being attracted to them). He has often characterized the [[trolls]] as homos, which is either a basic ''ad hominem'' attack or a sincere belief that anyone who draws penises on [[Rosechu]] must be gay.

Notably, in [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC chat]] from 02 January 2009, Chris made this statement:
{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"|Chris, 02 January 2009, 11:59}}

He added that gay men should be incarcerated in co-ed prisons with other female offenders and be provided with access to prostitutes, arguing that they would come out "reprogrammed" into healthy, law-abiding heterosexuals.

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|February 18 2009]], Chris issued a retraction of his previous homophobic remarks and declared that he respects "the gay people" like he respects his [[gal pals]] and his [[sweethearts]]. However, this was mostly done at the insistence of [[Julie]]; by [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|March 10]] Chris was reciting verses from the Bible to justify his position against homos.

On 14 June 2009, he created a video called [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], which in the Chris-chan tradition of ruining everything you ever loved is a homophobic version of Uncle Ruckus's song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from the pilot episode of "The Boondocks."

Later on in the day, he published an apology for the video called "[[I'm Sorry, Dude]]", and insisted that he likes gays who "ac—...accomplish other things, like Stephen Fry who was a homosexual, but y'know he did a good job being a narrator on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''." This is, of course, displays Chris' ignorance, as Stephen Fry is also a famous actor, comedian, writer, narrator (on things other than LBP), and author of some extremely witty and charming blogs that have a large internet following, as well as being an advocate for gay rights. This apology was only posted for the sake of his [[gal pal]] Kim's boyfriend, whose gay brother apparently lost both his arms in Iraq.

Curiously, Chris goes out of his way to state that the children of Sonichu and Rosechu are watched over by [[Heather Iglesias]], whom he characterizes as "a pretty, trustworthy, good natured Spanish Lesbian." He further mentions that Heather keeps her sexuality a secret from the kids at the request of Sonichu himself. It is unknown why Chris mentions this, given that he has vacillated wildly in the past in his feelings on lesbianism, sometimes [[Mumble 1|coming out in support]] and other times [[CWC "Boyfriend"|condemning it]], or why the character is both Hispanic and a lesbian.

Chris occasionally tries to say he respects homosexuals for who they are. However, he repeatedly betrays his intolerance of different lifestyles, often within the same statement.

{{quote|"I personally respect the individual people as fellow human beings, and I am cool with associating with them as acquaintances and friends, but Please Do Not Wave Around what you do behind closed doors around me; NOBODY CARES TO KNOW; I PERSONALLY DO NOT CARE TO KNOW. Even within my imagination, I Do Not Care to even have the pictures Randomly Pop up in my head."|Chris <ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality</ref>}}

Because it's OK for him to wave around his degenerate sexuality and showcase real life pictures of his disgusting activities, but god forbid a well-adjusted male adult mention they love other men.

On 8 July, Chris left a comment on a PSN News Post in reference to a Unity avatar:<ref>http://blog.us.playstation.com/2009/07/attention-fighting-fans-prove-youre-the-best-around/</ref>
{{quotebox|Hey, the Street Fighter Tourney is good news, but I have a concern about the person who left the message.

His Avitar…

If that icon is WHAT I THINK IT IS, I AM OFFENDED; please change your Avitar, dude.}}

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 26, 2009|July 26 2009]], Chris goes so far as to call gay a synonym for stupid.

In the mailbag section of the [[CWCipedia]], Chris describes at length his idea for his comic self to travel to the future, where scientists have successfully isolated the "homo gene" (an idea stolen from [[Wikipedia:Family_Gay|this episode of]] [[Family Guy]]). They have not, however, isolated the "straight gene", and are only able to when Chris donates his own blood (Chris has once remarked that [[Honor roll|homosexuality could be cured by injecting blood from straight men into homosexuals]], or by imprisoning gays in [[Rape|co-ed prisons]]). Chris intended to bring at least two syringes of the solution back, one for [[Reldnahc]], and the other for emergencies (likely to be used on either himself, [[Magi-Chan]], or [[Megagi]]). Thanks to Chris's crippling insecurity about his sexuality, when this storyline finally came to light in [[Sonichu 10]], Chris amended this plan to not only bring back a couple of syringes, but also enough of the "cure" to turn every gay person on Earth straight.

Spoiler: because Chris is straight as a circle (as shown [[Homos#Evidence_that_Chris_is_a_homo|here]]), the vaccine would fail to work anyway.

Recently, [[Jack Thaddeus]] purchased advertisement space on the [[CWCkipedia]] to put up two ads on the site. One of them was an ad featuring Peter Griffin of Family Guy, pointing out that he and his creator, Seth MacFarlane, were supportive of gay rights. In retaliation, Chris blew his stack, [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|stating]]:

{{quote|I understand you getting paid to run ads in that box on the Cwcipedia. I feel okay with Vivian's Audiobooks, BUT I feel OFFENDED with the Mexico Contest and Gay-Rights Ads. The Pickle on the Mexico ad reminds me of a terrible time in my past with Pickle-Suited TROLLS, and '''I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLES and FOR STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUALITY.'''

Please Remove, or Change the Images of, THE TWO ADS.

And in the future, if you plan on adding more advertisements, INCLUDING the associated images, Please run them by me in a message for my personal Approval BEFORE you start running the ads.

Thank you.|Chris, [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User_talk:WikiSysop#The_New_Ad-Links]}}

On Christmas Day, 2009, the Sysop at the CWCipedia added a Twitter onto the webpage. Two days later, Chris saw this and flew into a tizzy, wanting the Twitter off as he didn't want any "homo trolls" talking behind his back.

Around New Year 2010, Chris replaced Jack Thaddeus's gay-friendly ads with ads for [[wikipedia:Love In Action|Love In Action]] (an "ex-gay" ministry), ProtectMarriage.com (a site promoting [[wikipedia:California Proposition 8 (2008)|Proposition 8]]), and a site that calls for a boycott on Pepsi due to their gay-friendliness. In another ad, he also suggested that ''[[wikipedia:Avatar (2009 film)|Avatar]]'' was a ''totally'' straight film. To sum it up: Ex-gay campaigns, Proposition 8 and ridiculous consumer boycotts — in one fell swoop, Chris managed to put in three big things that do ''not'' win himself any gay friends whatsoever and prove all of his previous "respect" for gays is nothing but idle words.

On January 5th, Chris responded a [[mailbag]] letter addressing the homosexual subject. In the answer, Chris stated that [[Magi-Chan]] keeps a constant psychic-surveillance to ensure that there are no homos in CWCville. When founded evidence of homosexuality in a couple, the people involved would be arrested and fined heavily. It is worth noticing that, like Chris, good chaps like Hitler and Mussolini had a similar approach when addresing the homosexual lifestyle. Chris also apparently fails to notice that by having Magi-chan constantly reading people's mind would infringe the most important and basic of human's rights: the right of freedom of thinking. He also fails to realize that having Magi-chan scan Cwcville for gay thoughts would end in Chris getting arrested due to the fact that he says he has random images of penises appear in his head.

Then, on January 7th, when answering the question of how he began hating the gay population, we got this interesting insight...

{{quote|I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, 2003 just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE!|[[Common Questions#Answered 07 January 2010|Chris, before finally stating (for the umpteenth time) that Sonichu is straight]]}}

Not only is this ironic, considering his current views on lesbianism, but it adds another interesting aspect to his hatred: Chris's frustration with homos stems from him being childish and whiny about not getting his way, just because ''one'' woman turned him down. We wouldn't expect anything different from him.

==Evidence that Chris is a homo==
[[Image:564Homos.jpg|thumb|left|At least Chris doesn't [[fail]] at cataloguing pictures. [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality No, it's not a shoop].]]
[[Image:CWCMonica.jpg|thumb|Oh lawd, is dat some lipstick on Chris?]]

{{quote|First off, should such images [of men's asses] enter your mind at random, just stop yourself. I have had this problem too. I would take all such images when they enter my mind and just delete them; I imagine, in my mind, rolling them all into a ball, shrinking it down, and tossing them into a garbage can that links to my Stomach through a direct bodily vein. I imagine the feeling of it falling through the vein and making its splash landing into the stomach acid and dissolving; gone forever.|Chris admitting he's had homoerotic fantasies, [[Mailbag 4]]}}

[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|Fun fact: [[rainbow]] colors are the internationally recognized colors for the gay pride movement.]]
[[Image:Sonichuballs.jpg|thumb|For someone who claims to be straight, Chris sure does love talking about BALLS. Also, balls are touching.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|That's one [[pickle|phallic]] [[Lego]] tower you're building there, Chris.]]
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]
[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|Ironically, the harder Chris tries to convince people he's straight, the more gay he appears.]] He has absolutely no awareness that an uptight, milquetoast, colorfully-dressed, squeaky-voiced man saying "I am straight! I have a subscription to ''Playboy''!" every five minutes looks like he has something he's trying to hide. Furthermore, the more we learn about Chris, the more gay he really appears to be.

* He owns, or at least has owned, anal beads and a vibrator, and he is on record as having experimented with putting both toys in his anus. In a chat during the [[Vanessa Saga]] on 16 [[April 2009]], he claimed that he no longer shoved things up his ass, except for "a narrow jet of water from my adjustable shower-head on a hose". Although it is quite possible to stick things up your butt and still be straight, people who are terrified of being turned gay generally do not do this.

* Christian argues that the vibrator and anal beads were sent to him as a free gift with an order of straight pornography; he did not ask for them or pay for them. However, according to [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|the receipts]] that were uncovered by trolls, Chris specifically asked for the anal beads as a free gift.

* Chris gets upset that people know he has the vibrator and anal beads, and he gets upset that people think he's gay because he kept the vibrator and anal beads... but he never gets upset that the store sent him the vibrator and anal beads in the first place. You would think that if a troll sent him a dildo he'd be throwing a fit about it on [[YouTube]], but no.

* Chris kept the vibrator around for months.

* In the [[Chris Sex Logs]], Chris shows off a dildo to [[PandaHalo]]. He immediately suggests the phallic sex toy is something [[Sex_Logs#This_is_my_dildo|goes up your butt]], and then [[Lie|immediately denies it's been up his butt]]. He also says having a dildo in your butt "will feel good."

* He collects [[My Little Pony]] figures well into early adulthood. 'Nuff said.

* For a straight man, he does [[Semen#Transcript|guzzle a lot of cum]]. Likewise, the idea of [[Kacey Phone Call|licking his own semen]] off of one of his gal-pals sexually arouses him.

* Like many gay men, most of his [[gal-pal|"friends"]] were female and he never slept with any of them.

* In a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN Chat with Julie]], Chris admitted that he randomly has images of penises (his own and others he's seen in porn) pop into his head. He also claims to hear voices in his head that say "Christian is gay." Unless Chris is having ''very specific'' auditory hallucinations, it's likely he has homoerotic daydreams and freaks out about it. In the same chat he sounded ''delighted'' describing the first time he saw semen in a porno movie as a teenager.

* Christian has stated that if he were unable to stay straight he would undergo sex reassignment surgery; he would rather be female than gay. It should be noted that 99.9999999999996% of straight men never, ever, put this much thought into this hypothetical dilemma.

* On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009|February 05 2009]] Chris posted two videos stating that he was coming out of the closet as a gay man. He later issued a retraction which was far less persuasive.

* When negotiating for the safe return of his PSN account from [[Max]], Chris was given the choice of burning his [[medallion]] or shoving it up his ass. Chris immediately chose to shove it up his ass.

* Chris thought a straight woman would be turned on by a [[nudes|closeup picture of his anus]].

* He wears a pink [[Belt Buckle of Fail|belt buckle]].

* He owns a set of [[Anime Wings]] which are basically hair clips. And hair clips are for women.

* Chris says he is the [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 9th, 2009|King of All Cosmos]], with the Cosmo being the pink drink originating from San Francisco associated with ''Sex and the City'', and gay men everywhere. Additionally, the namesake Katamari character not only vomits rainbows as a mode of transportation, but wears open-chested shirts and colorful tights that show off his Liefeld-esque MASSIVE AREA.

* His best man at [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|his wedding]] is [[Sarah Hammer]] in drag.

* [[Axe]], frequently used by gay men, is Chris's grooming product of choice.

*He sang "I Love the Nightlife" on his [[Chris's Big Night Out|visit to a local bar/restaurant]], which is a song with large gay following.

* [[Christian_and_the_Hedgehog_Boys_(album)|Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] features two covers of the Backstreet Boys, one cover of a [[Britney Spears]] song and one cover of a Ricky Martin song. This music was popular among 13 year old girls when it was new and is popular among the gay community today.

* Chris sure talks a lot about things "out his ass," such as "lying out [his] ass" when saying "''[[BILLY MAYS]] IS THE NEW MAYOR OF CWCVILLE.''"

* [[muscle bra|He wears a bra.]]

* He implores men to wear [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|muscle bras]] because looking at shirtless men makes Chris uncomfortable, possibly arousing latent homosexual urges.

* He saved a [[No More Jokes|homoerotic image]] to his computer, and then made a series of movies about it.

* When you look up "'''Homosexuality'''" in Chris's [[CWCipedia|own web encyclopedia]], you ''literally'' see his own portrait (as shown on the screencap on the right).

* Note that [[CWCipedia]] has a quite lengthy article on [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality Homosexuality], while not even having one on [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Rosechu Rosechu].

* In the [[PS3 History Level|PS3 History Level]] video, he showed that he actually owns a copy of ''Sex and the City: The Movie'' (which has a huge gay following) when he showcased his then current collection of [[PS3]] games and movies.

* While narrating the [[Sonichu_Powerpoint|Sonichu Powerpoint]] Chris called PandaHalo his "partner," a term sometimes used by gays and lesbians to refer to the person they're dating.

* In his response to a letter in [[Mailbag 4]] about "impure" homoerotic thoughts, Chris confesses that he "[has] had this problem too," and has to resort to deleting them through a curious process that involves tossing them into a garbage bin inside him, lest the gay gene take its toll.

* Chris reacts to Alec Benson Leary's [[Asperchu]] comics by giving the all the characters a free makeover.

==Defenses against becoming homo==
[[Image:CWCIsSTRAIGHT.jpg|thumb|According to Chris, heterosexuals defend their sexuality by taping index cards indicating their straightness to their shoes (while stomping on [[vibrator]]s). Srsly.]]

It's hard work for a warrior of true love and honesty to stay straight. Luckily, Chris has a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] which he stares at everyday to stave off his temptations of homosexuality.

Chris also subscribes to ''Playboy'' to help keep himself straight. You can tell he's straight because when he's explaining what he finds attractive in women it only takes five minutes for him to get around to boobies and [[China|vaginas]].

When homosexual (or potentially homosexual) [[trolls|fans]] sent Chris questions on the [[CWCipedia]] asking for tips to STAY STRAIGHT, Chris tends to offer what essentially amounts to self-brainwashing. Some of his ideas include thinking of naked women and how awesome they are, and imagining being struck by painful lightning whenever a homosexual thought occurs. He also clarifies that one need not buy their own [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail]]: any poster featuring attractive women (preferably in bikinis and looking sexy) will do the trick.

To prevent future homos, he also encourages women to not drink, smoke, or be physically abused while pregnant because he believes this could cause the baby to be born homosexual {{cite}}

In [[Kill De Jack]], Chris reveals another one of his defences against becoming a homo: he covers a section of his "[[CWC-ism|computer]]" (we can assume that he means "computer screen") with a piece of paper so that he can browse [[CWCipedia]] without looking at [[Jack Thaddeus]]'s ads featuring pictures of homosexual men.
{{clear}}

==Chris on his alleged homosexuality==

[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]]]

*''"I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT! I WILL NOT BE VEERED INTO ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!!!"''<ref>[[Masturbating and squirtin']]</ref> 

*''"I'M STRAIGHT! I'M STRAIGHT! '''YOU'RE THE HOMOS!''' EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref> 

*''"I'm straight, don't doubt me!"'''<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref> 

*''"Listen, as hard as you fucking can, [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|I CAME OUT OF MY]] AUTISTIC [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|CLOSET]] AS A STRAIGHT MAN, and NOTHING ELSE. SO YOU IMMATURE JERKS CAN JUST FUCK OFF."'''<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref> 

*''"Yep, you heard me. I am...a [[gaybian|gaaaaaaaaay...bian]]."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the First Video]]</ref> 

*''"Anyway the, uh--anyway so, to get to the point...fine. I'm guhh. I'm gaaaay. I'm gaay. I said it...OK. Yep. So...did I really come out of the closet there? That just depends on y'all--how y'all understand it."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the Second Video]]</ref>

*''"And look at me. Do I look like-- [shakes head in disagreement] '''No more of those stupid acquisition messages!''' Get it through your fucking, individual, damn, dirty, SKULLS! '''I. Am. STRAIGHT!'''"''<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts]]</ref>

Alternatively, you could just read Chris defending his straightness for the umpteenth time on [[CWCipedia]].

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Homosexuality}}

* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Chris and religion]]
* [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
* [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
* [[Gay 4 Sonichu]]
* [[Gaybian]] (a "male lesbian", according to Chris)
* [[It's UGH!]]
* [[Rainbow]]
* [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]]
* [[Magi-Chan]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyO3pnkI3H4 CWC(Ian Brandon Anderson) finally admits it]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE9hdbiwA3k Chris-Chan is sick of the lies!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOpGtblij8Y Chris-Chan proves those slanderous trolls wrong]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Homos]]

Homos

2010-01-20T01:12:26Z

Pugs Malone: /* Evidence that Chris is a homo */

{{quote|Homo males are objectionable, VERY objectionable (I hate them!)|Chris}}

[[Image:Homobad.jpg|thumb|'''STAY STRAIGHT!''']]

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] refers to '''homosexual people''' almost exclusively by the pejorative term "'''homos'''". He doesn't like them very much.

From the very beginning of his internet fame in [[2007]], his extreme opposition to homosexuality and his neurotic, obsessive demand that everyone [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"STAY STRAIGHT"]] have been the subject of many [[lulz]] and the target of many [[trolls]].

==Fear of being a homo==
[[Image:0067-Christian&Barbie.jpg|thumb|Chris tried to stay straight from an early age, by posing with Barbie.]]

{{quote|"Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."|Chris <ref>E-mail to Megan, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*:; Date: Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm</ref>}}

[[Image:What_Chris_thinks_he_looks_like.png|thumb|Chris shows his [[Rainbow|true colors]].]]
Chris's homophobia is just that: he is literally afraid of homosexuality and of anything that could conceivably cause a straight person to be "leered off the straight path." His terror is such that he can barely bring himself to even utter the word "gay" or any other term concerning gay people, except of course for "homo". He has said that he cannot even look at a picture of a [[pickle|penis]] without being "freaked out," and he has cited [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|several techniques]] he believes are necessary to maintain his sexual attraction to women. Chris is also convinced that chances of homosexuality are raised as a direct result of not engaging in heterosexual intercourse before maturation,<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Dating_Education</ref> his retarded [[Dating Education]] classes naturally being the reasonable solution to preventing people from becoming homos. His attitude could be explained by one of three possibilities:

# Chris is a heterosexual idiot, so he thinks the slightest thing could turn him gay unless he maintains constant vigilance.
# Chris is a repressed homosexual, so he ''knows'' the slightest thing could turn him gay, because he can barely resist the temptation.
# Chris is bisexual, yet his underdeveloped mind fails to grasp the fact that there's actually such a thing as male bisexuality, so he thinks that people really ''can'' choose their sexual preference, and that giving in to his feelings towards other males will automatically turn him gay.
# Chris is asexual, has no primal instincts attracting him to girls, so he must consciously go out of his way to stay straight and avoid becoming a homo.

We don't yet have enough information to determine which of these is true, and we won't until he kisses a man on the lips (currently scheduled for [[2010]]). Of course we have to consider (because Chris won't) the small point that anyone, gay or straight, man or [[China|woman]], white or [[Niggo|black]], would most likely rather clean their genitals with sandpaper than touch Chris.

==Hatred of homos==

Chris's animosity towards gay people seems to result primarily from his fear of them and their supposed ability/desire to make him gay (this, despite the fact that women are likely jealous of the fact that men don't have to worry about Chris being attracted to them). He has often characterized the [[trolls]] as homos, which is either a basic ''ad hominem'' attack or a sincere belief that anyone who draws penises on [[Rosechu]] must be gay.

Notably, in [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC chat]] from 02 January 2009, Chris made this statement:
{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"|Chris, 02 January 2009, 11:59}}

He added that gay men should be incarcerated in co-ed prisons with other female offenders and be provided with access to prostitutes, arguing that they would come out "reprogrammed" into healthy, law-abiding heterosexuals.

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|February 18 2009]], Chris issued a retraction of his previous homophobic remarks and declared that he respects "the gay people" like he respects his [[gal pals]] and his [[sweethearts]]. However, this was mostly done at the insistence of [[Julie]]; by [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|March 10]] Chris was reciting verses from the Bible to justify his position against homos.

On 14 June 2009, he created a video called [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], which in the Chris-chan tradition of ruining everything you ever loved is a homophobic version of Uncle Ruckus's song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from the pilot episode of "The Boondocks."

Later on in the day, he published an apology for the video called "[[I'm Sorry, Dude]]", and insisted that he likes gays who "ac—...accomplish other things, like Stephen Fry who was a homosexual, but y'know he did a good job being a narrator on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''." This is, of course, displays Chris' ignorance, as Stephen Fry is also a famous actor, comedian, writer, narrator (on things other than LBP), and author of some extremely witty and charming blogs that have a large internet following, as well as being an advocate for gay rights. This apology was only posted for the sake of his [[gal pal]] Kim's boyfriend, whose gay brother apparently lost both his arms in Iraq.

Curiously, Chris goes out of his way to state that the children of Sonichu and Rosechu are watched over by [[Heather Iglesias]], whom he characterizes as "a pretty, trustworthy, good natured Spanish Lesbian." He further mentions that Heather keeps her sexuality a secret from the kids at the request of Sonichu himself. It is unknown why Chris mentions this, given that he has vacillated wildly in the past in his feelings on lesbianism, sometimes [[Mumble 1|coming out in support]] and other times [[CWC "Boyfriend"|condemning it]], or why the character is both Hispanic and a lesbian.

Chris occasionally tries to say he respects homosexuals for who they are. However, he repeatedly betrays his intolerance of different lifestyles, often within the same statement.

{{quote|"I personally respect the individual people as fellow human beings, and I am cool with associating with them as acquaintances and friends, but Please Do Not Wave Around what you do behind closed doors around me; NOBODY CARES TO KNOW; I PERSONALLY DO NOT CARE TO KNOW. Even within my imagination, I Do Not Care to even have the pictures Randomly Pop up in my head."|Chris <ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality</ref>}}

Because it's OK for him to wave around his degenerate sexuality and showcase real life pictures of his disgusting activities, but god forbid a well-adjusted male adult mention they love other men.

On 8 July, Chris left a comment on a PSN News Post in reference to a Unity avatar:<ref>http://blog.us.playstation.com/2009/07/attention-fighting-fans-prove-youre-the-best-around/</ref>
{{quotebox|Hey, the Street Fighter Tourney is good news, but I have a concern about the person who left the message.

His Avitar…

If that icon is WHAT I THINK IT IS, I AM OFFENDED; please change your Avitar, dude.}}

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 26, 2009|July 26 2009]], Chris goes so far as to call gay a synonym for stupid.

In the mailbag section of the [[CWCipedia]], Chris describes at length his idea for his comic self to travel to the future, where scientists have successfully isolated the "homo gene" (an idea stolen from [[Wikipedia:Family_Gay|this episode of]] [[Family Guy]]). They have not, however, isolated the "straight gene", and are only able to when Chris donates his own blood (Chris has once remarked that [[Honor roll|homosexuality could be cured by injecting blood from straight men into homosexuals]], or by imprisoning gays in [[Rape|co-ed prisons]]). Chris intended to bring at least two syringes of the solution back, one for [[Reldnahc]], and the other for emergencies (likely to be used on either himself, [[Magi-Chan]], or [[Megagi]]). Thanks to Chris's crippling insecurity about his sexuality, when this storyline finally came to light in [[Sonichu 10]], Chris amended this plan to not only bring back a couple of syringes, but also enough of the "cure" to turn every gay person on Earth straight.

Spoiler: because Chris is straight as a circle (as shown [[Homos#Evidence_that_Chris_is_a_homo|here]]), the vaccine would fail to work anyway.

Recently, [[Jack Thaddeus]] purchased advertisement space on the [[CWCkipedia]] to put up two ads on the site. One of them was an ad featuring Peter Griffin of Family Guy, pointing out that he and his creator, Seth MacFarlane, were supportive of gay rights. In retaliation, Chris blew his stack, [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|stating]]:

{{quote|I understand you getting paid to run ads in that box on the Cwcipedia. I feel okay with Vivian's Audiobooks, BUT I feel OFFENDED with the Mexico Contest and Gay-Rights Ads. The Pickle on the Mexico ad reminds me of a terrible time in my past with Pickle-Suited TROLLS, and '''I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLES and FOR STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUALITY.'''

Please Remove, or Change the Images of, THE TWO ADS.

And in the future, if you plan on adding more advertisements, INCLUDING the associated images, Please run them by me in a message for my personal Approval BEFORE you start running the ads.

Thank you.|Chris, [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User_talk:WikiSysop#The_New_Ad-Links]}}

On Christmas Day, 2009, the Sysop at the CWCipedia added a Twitter onto the webpage. Two days later, Chris saw this and flew into a tizzy, wanting the Twitter off as he didn't want any "homo trolls" talking behind his back.

Around New Year 2010, Chris replaced Jack Thaddeus's gay-friendly ads with ads for [[wikipedia:Love In Action|Love In Action]] (an "ex-gay" ministry), ProtectMarriage.com (a site promoting [[wikipedia:California Proposition 8 (2008)|Proposition 8]]), and a site that calls for a boycott on Pepsi due to their gay-friendliness. In another ad, he also suggested that ''[[wikipedia:Avatar (2009 film)|Avatar]]'' was a ''totally'' straight film. To sum it up: Ex-gay campaigns, Proposition 8 and ridiculous consumer boycotts — in one fell swoop, Chris managed to put in three big things that do ''not'' win himself any gay friends whatsoever and prove all of his previous "respect" for gays is nothing but idle words.

On January 5th, Chris responded a [[mailbag]] letter addressing the homosexual subject. In the answer, Chris stated that [[Magi-Chan]] keeps a constant psychic-surveillance to ensure that there are no homos in CWCville. When founded evidence of homosexuality in a couple, the people involved would be arrested and fined heavily. It is worth noticing that, like Chris, good chaps like Hitler and Mussolini had a similar approach when addresing the homosexual lifestyle. Chris also apparently fails to notice that by having Magi-chan constantly reading people's mind would infringe the most important and basic of human's rights: the right of freedom of thinking. He also fails to realize that having Magi-chan scan Cwcville for gay thoughts would end in Chris getting arrested due to the fact that he says he has random images of penises appear in his head.

Then, on January 7th, when answering the question of how he began hating the gay population, we got this interesting insight...

{{quote|I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, 2003 just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE!|[[Common Questions#Answered 07 January 2010|Chris, before finally stating (for the umpteenth time) that Sonichu is straight]]}}

Not only is this ironic, considering his current views on lesbianism, but it adds another interesting aspect to his hatred: Chris's frustration with homos stems from him being childish and whiny about not getting his way, just because ''one'' woman turned him down. We wouldn't expect anything different from him.

==Evidence that Chris is a homo==
[[Image:564Homos.jpg|thumb|left|At least Chris doesn't [[fail]] at cataloguing pictures. [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality No, it's not a shoop].]]
[[Image:CWCMonica.jpg|thumb|Oh lawd, is dat some lipstick on Chris?]]

{{quote|First off, should such images [of men's asses] enter your mind at random, just stop yourself. I have had this problem too. I would take all such images when they enter my mind and just delete them; I imagine, in my mind, rolling them all into a ball, shrinking it down, and tossing them into a garbage can that links to my Stomach through a direct bodily vein. I imagine the feeling of it falling through the vein and making its splash landing into the stomach acid and dissolving; gone forever.|Chris admitting he's had homoerotic fantasies, [[Mailbag 4]]}}

[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|Fun fact: [[rainbow]] colors are the internationally recognized colors for the gay pride movement.]]
[[Image:Sonichuballs.jpg|thumb|For someone who claims to be straight, Chris sure does love talking about BALLS. Also, balls are touching.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|That's one [[pickle|phallic]] [[Lego]] tower you're building there, Chris.]]
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]
[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|Ironically, the harder Chris tries to convince people he's straight, the more gay he appears.]] He has absolutely no awareness that an uptight, milquetoast, colorfully-dressed, squeaky-voiced man saying "I am straight! I have a subscription to ''Playboy''!" every five minutes looks like he has something he's trying to hide. Furthermore, the more we learn about Chris, the more gay he really appears to be.

* He owns, or at least has owned, anal beads and a vibrator, and he is on record as having experimented with putting both toys in his anus. In a chat during the [[Vanessa Saga]] on 16 [[April 2009]], he claimed that he no longer shoved things up his ass, except for "a narrow jet of water from my adjustable shower-head on a hose". Although it is quite possible to stick things up your butt and still be straight, people who are terrified of being turned gay generally do not do this.

* Christian argues that the vibrator and anal beads were sent to him as a free gift with an order of straight pornography; he did not ask for them or pay for them. However, according to [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|the receipts]] that were uncovered by trolls, Chris specifically asked for the anal beads as a free gift.

* Chris gets upset that people know he has the vibrator and anal beads, and he gets upset that people think he's gay because he kept the vibrator and anal beads... but he never gets upset that the store sent him the vibrator and anal beads in the first place. You would think that if a troll sent him a dildo he'd be throwing a fit about it on [[YouTube]], but no.

* Chris kept the vibrator around for months.

* In the [[Chris Sex Logs]], Chris shows off a dildo to [[PandaHalo]]. He immediately suggests the phallic sex toy is something [[Sex_Logs#This_is_my_dildo|goes up your butt]], and then [[Lie|immediately denies it's been up his butt]]. He also says having a dildo in your butt "will feel good."

* He collects [[My Little Pony]] figures well into early adulthood. 'Nuff said.

* For a straight man, he does [[Semen#Transcript|guzzle a lot of cum]]. Likewise, the idea of [[Kacey Phone Call|licking his own semen]] off of one of his gal-pals sexually arouses him.

* Like many gay men, most of his [[gal-pal|"friends"]] were female and he never slept with any of them.

* In a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN Chat with Julie]], Chris admitted that he randomly has images of penises (his own and others he's seen in porn) pop into his head. He also claims to hear voices in his head that say "Christian is gay." Unless Chris is having ''very specific'' auditory hallucinations, it's likely he has homoerotic daydreams and freaks out about it. In the same chat he sounded ''delighted'' describing the first time he saw semen in a porno movie as a teenager.

* Christian has stated that if he were unable to stay straight he would undergo sex reassignment surgery; he would rather be female than gay. It should be noted that 99.9999999999996% of straight men never, ever, put this much thought into this hypothetical dilemma.

* On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009|February 05 2009]] Chris posted two videos stating that he was coming out of the closet as a gay man. He later issued a retraction which was far less persuasive.

* When negotiating for the safe return of his PSN account from [[Max]], Chris was given the choice of burning his [[medallion]] or shoving it up his ass. Chris immediately chose to shove it up his ass.

* Chris thought a straight woman would be turned on by a [[nudes|closeup picture of his anus]].

* He wears a pink [[Belt Buckle of Fail|belt buckle]].

* He owns a set of [[Anime Wings]] which are basically hair clips. And hair clips are for women.

* Chris says he is the [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 9th, 2009|King of All Cosmos]], with the Cosmo being the pink drink originating from San Francisco associated with ''Sex and the City'', and gay men everywhere. Additionally, the namesake Katamari character not only vomits rainbows as a mode of transportation, but wears open-chested shirts and colorful tights that show off his Liefeld-esque MASSIVE AREA.

* His best man at [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|his wedding]] is [[Sarah Hammer]] in drag.

* [[Axe]], frequently used by gay men, is Chris's grooming product of choice.

*He sang "I Love the Nightlife" on his [[Chris's Big Night Out|visit to a local bar/restaurant]], which is a song with large gay following.

* [[Christian_and_the_Hedgehog_Boys_(album)|Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] features two covers of the Backstreet Boys , one cover of a [[Britney Spears]] song and one cover of a Ricky Martin song. This music was popular among 13 year old girls when it was new and is popular among the gay community today.

* Chris sure talks a lot about things "out his ass," such as "lying out [his] ass" when saying "''[[BILLY MAYS]] IS THE NEW MAYOR OF CWCVILLE.''"

* [[muscle bra|He wears a bra.]]

* He implores men to wear [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|muscle bras]] because looking at shirtless men makes Chris uncomfortable, possibly arousing latent homosexual urges.

* He saved a [[No More Jokes|homoerotic image]] to his computer, and then made a series of movies about it.

* When you look up "'''Homosexuality'''" in Chris's [[CWCipedia|own web encyclopedia]], you ''literally'' see his own portrait (as shown on the screencap on the right).

* Note that [[CWCipedia]] has a quite lengthy article on [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality Homosexuality], while not even having one on [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Rosechu Rosechu].

* In the [[PS3 History Level|PS3 History Level]] video, he showed that he actually owns a copy of ''Sex and the City: The Movie'' (which has a huge gay following) when he showcased his then current collection of [[PS3]] games and movies.

* While narrating the [[Sonichu_Powerpoint|Sonichu Powerpoint]] Chris called PandaHalo his "partner," a term sometimes used by gays and lesbians to refer to the person they're dating.

* In his response to a letter in [[Mailbag 4]] about "impure" homoerotic thoughts, Chris confesses that he "[has] had this problem too," and has to resort to deleting them through a curious process that involves tossing them into a garbage bin inside him, lest the gay gene take its toll.

* Chris reacts to Alec Benson Leary's [[Asperchu]] comics by giving the all the characters a free makeover.

==Defenses against becoming homo==
[[Image:CWCIsSTRAIGHT.jpg|thumb|According to Chris, heterosexuals defend their sexuality by taping index cards indicating their straightness to their shoes (while stomping on [[vibrator]]s). Srsly.]]

It's hard work for a warrior of true love and honesty to stay straight. Luckily, Chris has a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] which he stares at everyday to stave off his temptations of homosexuality.

Chris also subscribes to ''Playboy'' to help keep himself straight. You can tell he's straight because when he's explaining what he finds attractive in women it only takes five minutes for him to get around to boobies and [[China|vaginas]].

When homosexual (or potentially homosexual) [[trolls|fans]] sent Chris questions on the [[CWCipedia]] asking for tips to STAY STRAIGHT, Chris tends to offer what essentially amounts to self-brainwashing. Some of his ideas include thinking of naked women and how awesome they are, and imagining being struck by painful lightning whenever a homosexual thought occurs. He also clarifies that one need not buy their own [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail]]: any poster featuring attractive women (preferably in bikinis and looking sexy) will do the trick.

To prevent future homos, he also encourages women to not drink, smoke, or be physically abused while pregnant because he believes this could cause the baby to be born homosexual {{cite}}

In [[Kill De Jack]], Chris reveals another one of his defences against becoming a homo: he covers a section of his "[[CWC-ism|computer]]" (we can assume that he means "computer screen") with a piece of paper so that he can browse [[CWCipedia]] without looking at [[Jack Thaddeus]]'s ads featuring pictures of homosexual men.
{{clear}}

==Chris on his alleged homosexuality==

[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]]]

*''"I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT! I WILL NOT BE VEERED INTO ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!!!"''<ref>[[Masturbating and squirtin']]</ref> 

*''"I'M STRAIGHT! I'M STRAIGHT! '''YOU'RE THE HOMOS!''' EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref> 

*''"I'm straight, don't doubt me!"'''<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref> 

*''"Listen, as hard as you fucking can, [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|I CAME OUT OF MY]] AUTISTIC [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|CLOSET]] AS A STRAIGHT MAN, and NOTHING ELSE. SO YOU IMMATURE JERKS CAN JUST FUCK OFF."'''<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref> 

*''"Yep, you heard me. I am...a [[gaybian|gaaaaaaaaay...bian]]."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the First Video]]</ref> 

*''"Anyway the, uh--anyway so, to get to the point...fine. I'm guhh. I'm gaaaay. I'm gaay. I said it...OK. Yep. So...did I really come out of the closet there? That just depends on y'all--how y'all understand it."''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the Second Video]]</ref>

*''"And look at me. Do I look like-- [shakes head in disagreement] '''No more of those stupid acquisition messages!''' Get it through your fucking, individual, damn, dirty, SKULLS! '''I. Am. STRAIGHT!'''"''<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts]]</ref>

Alternatively, you could just read Chris defending his straightness for the umpteenth time on [[CWCipedia]].

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Homosexuality}}

* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Chris and religion]]
* [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
* [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
* [[Gay 4 Sonichu]]
* [[Gaybian]] (a "male lesbian", according to Chris)
* [[It's UGH!]]
* [[Rainbow]]
* [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]]
* [[Magi-Chan]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyO3pnkI3H4 CWC(Ian Brandon Anderson) finally admits it]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE9hdbiwA3k Chris-Chan is sick of the lies!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOpGtblij8Y Chris-Chan proves those slanderous trolls wrong]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Homos]]

True and Loyal Fanbase

2010-01-14T17:30:39Z

Pugs Malone: /* Personal Army */

[[Image:SchuComicFreeBack.jpg|thumb|Spread the word!]]

[[Chris]] constantly refers to his [[trolls|fans]] as his "'''True and Loyal Fanbase'''" (aka his "fandase"). Fun fact: There are no actual [[Sonichu]] fans. Literally none. Let's pretend that looking at the garbage Chris produces is not enough proof to support that statement. Let's pretend the fact that he updates his shit about once every six months, and expects everyone to wait patiently is not enough proof to support that statement. Consider this: If there actually was one, wouldn't we have found out about them by now?

==Personal Army==
As has befallen many an individual posting on the internet, Chris believes that he has a wide fanbase that adores him. While this is normally just [[Chris and reality|delusion]] coming from page views, Chris believes this despite the fact that his fans have repeatedly proven to be comprised exclusively of [[trolls]]. He addresses them whenever he feels they would be most helpful, such as when he needs votes in a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|contest]] or needs a [[Clyde Cash|troll taken care of]], and speaks with full expectation of people following through with these orders simply because he gave them. This idea was reinforced with the failed trolling of the [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes]], and it's possible that's what drives him to continue acting this way.

Chris takes his alleged fanbase completely for granted, ignoring them except when he needs them to do something. Chris frequently views his fanbase as his personal army, so when he issues threats [[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|to withhold the comics unless the ED page gets taken down]], he assumes that his TRUE and LOYAL fan will keep the [[trolls]] in check. The best example came on [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|27 August 2009]], when Chris implored his fanbase to remove every last video that showed the tour of his house after his family found out about it. To this day, mirrors of the two-part video still pop up to mock Chris.

Despite the belief that his fans adore him, he is notoriously inattentive to the sort of things that allow a person to continue having fans. He believes that people love him for his [[Sonichu (comic)|comic]], and yet updates are often months apart. Also, he blames this on [[stress]] caused by the trolls. And, since he assigned his fans to take care of the trolls for him, he's essentially blaming them for the fact that he can't keep updates regular. He also shows his fans contempt by having the radio on in the background during fan chats over Mumble and giving extremely short responses to lengthy questions in the [[Mailbag]].

Recently, though, it seems that Chris thinks he can control what the fans do with their lives. In [[Down with asperchu|a recent video]], Chris tells his fans to never read an issue of [[Asperchu]] because "there are no LINKS" to Chris's works. It's slowly becoming obvious this his views of his fans are getting more warped day by day.

==List of fans who aren't trolls<ref>Some argue that Gina, a mentally retarded young lady, was indeed a genuine Sonichu fan, but it may be possible she was a very convincing [[Robert Simmons V]] clone or a genuine [[white knight]]. Either way, after [[The_July_10th_Messages#CWC_Calls_Out_sonichuizcool| he abused her]] she's no longer a fan.</ref>==
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|THERE ARE NONE, LOL]]

==Notes==
<references/>
==See also==
* [[Chris and his Ego]]
* [[Chris and Fame]]
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Dating education

2010-01-14T16:51:23Z

Pugs Malone: /* Summary */

[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|right|thumb|250px|The original prologue from Sonichu #8, where dating education was first mentioned]]
{{quote|Those who can, do; those who can't, teach|[[User:Anonymous|Anonymous]]}}
{{quote|Those who teach, can't.|[[Mumble 4|Chris]]}}

'''Dating education''' is [[Chris]]'s term for the formal instruction he believes should be available to instruct people on how to date. The concept is intended to be analogous to [[Wikipedia:sex education|sex education]]; Chris's premise is that it is pointless to teach young people how to interact sexually if they don't even know how to interact socially. As with "sex ed," Chris abbreviates dating education to "'''date ed'''," and is overly fascinated with the (alleged) joke that the idea of "date ed" sounds "dated."

Judging from a [[Mailbag]] reply he posted, Chris considers the Dating Education Class to be one of his most noteworthy "[[inventions]]," alongside [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]] and some [[Lego]] contraption for carrying [[Pokémon]] cards.

==Origins==
Consistent with his [[autism]] and his particular refusal to accept [[Chris and reality|reality]], Chris tries to seek out clear, direct steps in social interactions where his natural gut instincts and social skills (or lack thereof) [[fail]] him. While modern psychology offers such people social skills groups which address the root issues by introducing basic social skills, Chris instead prefers his own notion of dating education and would rather sit around waiting for the public school system to implement it. In fact, his school apparently did have a "Coping Skills" class, mostly likely part of a [[Wikipedia:Special education|special education curriculum]], which he was required to attend. But he says that he'd either read ''[[R.L. Stine|Goosebumps]]'' or sleep through class.

==Intended goals==
In his own words, Chris describes why he feels the need for sex ed:

{{quote|
As I have proposed the idea in my adult life within my Sonichu Comic Books, and a bit before then, High Schools SHOULD have Dating Education Classes along with the Sexual Education Classes. In my humble opinion, Sex ED is fine for AFTER 3 or so DATES, but HOW DO WE EVEN GET TO THE FIRST DATE?!!! If I had the Dating Education back then, I wouldn't have to had suffered being a frustrated virgin for soo many years.
|[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#Dating education|Wikipedia autobiography]]
}}

He genuinely believes the reason why he doesn't have a sweetheart is not due to the fact he's lazy, [[fat]], ugly, [[niggos|racist]], [[homos|homophobic]], a [[List of Chris's lies|liar]], and an overall failure but that he merely doesn't know ''how'' to date and has no experience. In his mind, most people are single because they don't know how to go about on a date, not due to personal defect.

Here it may be important to differentiate [[Chris and Reality | real life]] Sexual Education from Chris's warped notion. Had Chris not been sleeping or reading Goosebumps, he may have noticed these courses provide not a step by step description of how to pound [[china]], but provide a source of reference on responsible sexual behaviors. Instead of a run-down of myriad STDs, Chris assumes the course provided the same educational experience he's gotten from countless Pornos. His proposed class depends on a conceit that has no worldly counterpart. In short, Chris is an idiot and has no idea how anything works.

==Summary==
In principle Chris believes dating education should be taught in high school as a companion course with sex ed; however since the primary audience for this class is himself he has depicted it as being available at a collegiate level as well. To persuade the world to introduce date ed Chris devoted [[Episode 19]] of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' to demonstrating his vision. However, the paradox of dating education is that it is supposed to teach Chris things he ''doesn't'' know, while his depiction of it is necessarily limited to teaching only what he ''does'' know, which is limited to the children's book [[How to Talk to Girls]]. As a result, dating education ends up being a semester of being sequestered away from potential mates while chatting with them anonymously over the internet, until love arbitrarily happens. Presumably, under Chris's understanding of love, his characters will be trolled relentlessly in the meantime.

Also, Chris's schooling in the past has helped him little. Despite taking sex ed classes, he believes he can recycle his [[semen]] by swallowing it; despite taking art classes, he still cannot hold a pen correctly; and despite taking a marketing course at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]], he still takes [[Axe]] commercials as gospel. Even if Date Ed did exist, Chris would most likely learn nothing from it.

In short, Chris believes he is capable of teaching something he is demanding that be taught to him and others on a grand scale.

==Course Syllabus==
'''Required text''': ''[[How to Talk to Girls]]''

'''Core concepts''':
*''"Remain calm and to keel all flustered emotions off your minds when first approaching your person of emotional interest"''

*[[Sweetheart from the ground up|Be friends first]] and ''"let the romantic emotions grow between you two over a reasonable amount of time. A few weeks to even a few months will multiple meetings and dates with your friend are reccomended [sic]."''

*A gentlemen ''"[[Emily|should ask before kissing her]] (or you), as a gesture of respect and kindness"''

'''Methodology:'''
*Boys are given [[Barbara]] dolls and girls are given [[Bob Chandler|Robert]] dolls to better understand the "opposite gender."

*Students are paired up by the teacher over the internet anonymously and then eventually reveal themselves and fall in love in person.

*Students will be required to regularly do short transcripts of imaginary conversations with GI Joes for the women and Barbies with the men.

*[[Darkies]] are rejected by anthropomorphic [[Pokémon]] because Chris hates them

==Final Exam==
[[Image:SchuComic10P30.jpg|thumb|right|Final Exam as written by Chris in episode 19.]]
The final exam consists of 10 questions, the last being an essay question. No calculators. Black or blue ink only. You have one hour to complete. Send all answers to Chris himself so they may be <strike>used to improve his own personal dating method</strike> graded.

{{quotebox|
Name_________________ Date__________

 1. About _% of regular girls ditch boys, and _% of pretty girls ditch boys
 A. 10/100 B. 50/50 C. 73/98 D. 75/13

 2. Which of the follow characteristics attract your opposite gender best?
 A. Class Clown B. Full Show-Off C. Silent - Types D. None of the Above

 3. When is an appropriate time to ask for a phone number?
 A. Upfront B. Middle of Converstation [sic] C. End of Enjoyable Conversation

 4. Boys can be like magnets, and girls the metal, when the boy is confident, honest, and smart.
 A. True B. False

 5. When there should be a girl for every boy, all people of your opposite gender is already taken by some other dude or gal.
 A. True B. False

 6. If the relationship or crush doesn't work out, you...
 A. Worry B. Move On C. Cry and Pout D. None of the above

 7. How should you approach the person of your opposite gender if you are really shy?
 A. As a Friend First B. Run Away C. With [[Hanky panky|Hankey]] in Mind D. Send Someone Else

 8. If she/he gives you a wrong number, try harder on that person.
 A. True B. False

 9. To keep your girl/guy liking you, you should...
 A. Keep Clean B. Act Normal C. Show off A skill D. All of the Above

 10 Essay Question.
 From Approach to the end of the conversaion [sic], list a 10-step approach in walking to and talking to people of your opposite gender.

<nowiki>**</nowiki>FOR ALL Sonichu & Rosechu Site VISITORS AND COMIC READERS**

YOU MAY TAKE THIS EXAM FOR YOURSELF AND IF YOU DO, FEEL FREE TO COPY THIS IMAGE, PRINT IT OUT, AND TAKE THIS EXAM FOR YOURSELVES. THEN E-MAIL ME YOUR ANSWERS, VERBATIM, ESPECIALLY THE ESSAY QUESTION AND I WILL GRADE IT HONESTLY.
}}

In 3 November 2009, possibly not particularly enjoying grading the homework that people emailed him, Chris changed the final paragraph to read:

{{quotebox|YOU MAY TAKE THIS EXAM YOURSELF, AND YOU MAY GRADE IT YOURSELF WITH THE ANSWER KEY IN THE BACK OF THIS BOOK.

AND FOR THE ESSAY QUESTION, WRITE YOUR HONEST ANSWERS BEFORE COMPARING THEM TO THE BEST EXAMPLE OF AN ANSWER ALONGSIDE THE ANSWER KEY.}}

===Answer Key===
On 01 [[August 2009]], Chris uploaded an answer key to the test as it appears on the test, including a suggested essay question answer.

# C
# D
# C
# A
# B
# B
# A
# B
# D

{{quotebox|1=<nowiki>**</nowiki>This was an Open Question with Multiple Answer Variation depending on person writing the essay. 
<nowiki>**</nowiki>Here is what I feel is the BEST EXAMPLE of an answer from Chi-Chian of the [[PSN]]; Congratuations! =D 

1. Aprroach the boy 
- "Hi, what's up!"

2. Get the name 
- "I'm Alex, what are you called?"

3. Find out more, get his interest 
- "So what are you into? What music do you like? Seen any good movies lately?"

4. Give feedback, get opportunities for him to ask questions and get interested 
- "I'm into anime (my favorite is Puni Puni Poemy, by the way - Kobayashi Poemi is so funny!!). I’ve seen that movie too! I like that actor."

5. Give interest/compliments back 
- "I love your haircut ([[Chris and fashion|t-shirt]], [[Belt Buckle of Fail|belt]]. etc)! What's that [[AXE|cologne]]?"

6. Get more [[Honest Content|intimate details]] 
- "So how old are you? Come here often? You from around here?"

7. Food is a conversation foundation 
- "Can we go get lunch/dinner? Can you buy me something to drink? 
(I think a gentleman should buy the lady a drink. although I don't drink alcohol or smoke)."

8. At the food place you can expand on the themes previously discussed, such as art,
music or cinema. but allow the boy to talk as well, support him if he gets
shy or stumped.

9. A walk to [[Chris and health|help with digestion]]. Usually there's a couple of shops around
in crowded places, so you can always visit a couple together. Not necesserily
buying anything, just browsing. A bookshop or a music/video store
is always a good choice.

10. Alter the walk it‘s time to go, but this is where the telephone trade-offshould start. 
- "It"s been really cool talking and walking with you and I'd like to do it again sometime."

<nowiki>**</nowiki>Chi-Chian wrote and submitted her answers via e-mail, April 13, 2009. 
<nowiki>**</nowiki>CHRISTIAN WESTON CHANDLER WROTE THIS EXAM ON APRIL 11, 2009}}

<gallery>
Image:SchuComic9P65.jpg|Answers to the multiple choice.
Image:SchuComic9P66.jpg|Answers to the essay question.
</gallery>

==On the CWCipedia==

Surprise, surprise, Chris made a terrible article about his shitty idea. Interestingly, the article was copy-pasted from an essay he wrote.

''Originally written for a recent 2009 Community Support Contest sponsored by C-Ville's Battlefield Ford; too bad I did not win, but I'm not giving up on teaching our future generations the basics of Dating alongside Sexual Educaiton [sic].''

[[BILLY MAYS|BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE]]

{{quote | Dating Education Classes can best enforce the Natural Man-and-Woman Pairings/Couples; the homosexual count would be reduced. | Chris, on Dating Education Death Camps, because [[Homos|men are only gay because they can't find a woman to fuck]]}}

Of course, it makes perfect sense to teach future generations dating education, because the overpopulation could sure use a boost now! Why would "future generations" need to learn dating education if they don't seem to be having trouble with it? Chris doesn't understand that for a grassroots movement, you need more than one person to support and promote it.

==External Links==
*[http://www.mybuzzquiz.com/en_US/actions/PlayQuiz.do?fileID=310722 Abridged MyBuzz Quiz version of the exam]

{{CWCipedia|chris=Dating Education}}
{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]

Gay 4 Sonichu

2010-01-07T21:03:20Z

Pugs Malone: /* Impact */

[[Image:G4sbanner.jpg|center]]

[[Gay 4 Sonichu]] is the Internet's first web forum for [[Homos| Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgendered]] [[Sonichu (comic)| Sonichu]] [[True and Loyal Fanbase| fans]].

==Impact==
[[Image:SonichuGayPrideParade.jpg|thumb|right|Sonichu at the Gay Pride Parade. Chris believes that this blatantly photoshopped image is real.]]
While Gay 4 Sonichu was very short term, with only one instance of direct contact with Chris (in the form of an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC encounter]] between Chris and Gay 4 Sonichu founder [[Wikipedia:Ignatius_J._Reilly|Ignatius J. Reilly]], PhD.) it had a long term impact. Reilly's paper on the homoerotic themes of Sonichu, ''[[User:Champthom/Paper|Heterosexual Homoeroticism in Internet Subcultures: A Case Study]]'' (forthcoming in the Journal of Gay and Lesbian Subculture Studies, Fall 2009) seems to hit Chris hard. From [[CWCipedia]]:
{{quote|I have also heard of My Sonichu being written in College Essays that promote homosexuality. And even worse, promoting him in the Gay Pride Parades. '''WRONG LABELS; STOP WRITING OR PROMOTING ME OR MY CHARACTERS AS SUCH!''' [[Reldnahc_Ha-Taque|ALL Sonichus Are Straight!]] ALL Rosechus Are Straight! I Am Straight! My Comics are STRAIGHT COMICS. I, Sonichu and Rosechu, '''We Never Want to be part of ANY AND ALL Homosexual-Promoting Papers or Events, because with EVERY ITEM that is created from NOT OF MY OWN HANDS that EVEN Inklings such Wrongful Labelings upon, ME, Sonichu, Rosechu, and ALL MY STRAIGHT CHARACTERS, WE ARE ALL BEING DISREPECTED!'''|Chris<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality]</ref> }}

Chris has also [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retconned]] aspects of his comic that could be taken to be gay, such as the Rainbow Chris scene from [[Sub-Episode 2]] and redubbing the [[Sonichu Balls]] as Sonichu ''Crystals.''

==References by Chris==
*In [[Sonichu 9]], Chris alludes to Gay 4 Sonichu and Ignatius J. Reilly based on information from his IRC encounter, where Sonichu appreciates his fans regardless of sexual orientation, he reaffirms that Chris, Sonichu, Rosechu, etc. are '''STRAIGHT.''' In fact, he spends a grand total of one paragraph thanking his fans, no matter their orientation, and several pages ranting about being straight and how homosexuality is wrong.

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]

==External links==
*[http://gay4sonichu.yuku.com/ Gay 4 Sonichu]

[[Category:Sonichu]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

Chris and his ego

2010-01-07T17:55:05Z

Pugs Malone: /* Effects of Chris's egotism */

Of everything that makes Chris "[[Chris]]", his '''egotism''' is one of the most important and dangerous. His ego has gotten so big that he outright refuses to admit he is ever wrong (unless he thinks he can gain something by doing so), believe that potential [[sweethearts]] are actually [[trolls]], or admit that his [[comics]] are actually [[Fail|shitty]]. It is this egotism that may one day lead to someone playing [[Kick the Autistic]] for real.

==Origins of the ego==
As pointed out in the [[Chris and Fame]] page, Chris's ego has been formed and tempered by many things: coddling by his mother, [[Barbara]]; his victory in the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]]; and the fact that he can successfully use his [[autism]] as a crutch. Because of his mother, he believes that everything bad that happens to him is the fault of someone else - be it [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and the villainous [[jerkop]]s, slanderous [[troll]]s, the [[Nathanael_Greene_Elementary_School|school board]], or whoever else the Chandler parents were able to scapegoat. Because of his stroke of dumb luck in the Sonic contest, he feels that he is [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes|destined]] [[Harvey Birdman Commercial|to]] [[Pixelated PS3|win]] [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|everything]] with a minimal amount of effort, because he has autism and deserves special treatment.

Additionally, he has taken his [[Nintendo Power Magazine|occasional]] [[PS3 History Level|mentions]] [[:Image:Nintendochris.JPG|in]] [[:Image:CWCSchuCross.jpg|the]] [[:Image:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg|press]], largely about his obsession with video games, to mean he has become famous.

Chris' ego has notoriously contributed to his [[Chris and reality|warped perception of himself]]; he believes himself to be flawless, or almost flawless at the very least, since whatever few flaws he admits having, or is forced to admit he has, such as [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shitting himself]], [[Chris and health|running out of breath extraordinarily fast while running]], and [[Virgin with rage|not being able to get a girlfriend]] are assumed by him to happen "to the best of us" or being [[trolls|someone]] or [[Stress|something]] else's fault, leaving Chris to actually consider himself a normal person who happens to be autistic and [[Chris and fame|famous]].

His interactions with people have also formed his ego. After being kicked out of class at [[PVCC]], he decided he needed a girlfriend, but because of women not liking a man that smells of [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shit]], sweat and [[Axe]], he ended up setting a [[Sweetheart from the ground up|ridiculously high goal]] for himself. In the process, he refused to interact with men of any type, because they're all [[JERKS]] who have [[Noviophobia|taken all the girls and left none for him]], with the underlying implication that if he could only find a bunch of single women, he could "have his pick" of them. He feels that security guards are nothing more than [[jerkops|cock-blocking jerks]] because they interfere with his [[Love Quest]], when they're actually doing their job, and that trolls have nothing better to do than to torture him and need to GET A LIFE, when Chris is the one staying at home, drawing shitty comics in an attempt to get [[china]].

{{quote|Firstly, YOU WISH YOU WERE ME...|Chris, addressing a true and honest fan while being completely deluded, [[Rejected Mailbag]]}}

==War against the ego==
One of the main forces opposing Chris's ego are the [[white knights]]. These misguided souls have attempted to get Chris to understand that what he's doing is ridiculous and that he needs to grow up. Instead, he brushed them all aside, assuring himself that he was [[Honest Content|TRUE and HONEST]], and could do no wrong. One of the more popular white knights, [[Vivian Gee]], became a troll when she couldn't get through to Chris.

When asked to get real, psychiatric help, Chris has said that his church counselor, [[Rocky Shoemaker]], is enough for him, and that she could do so much more than someone with ''an actual degree in that field.'' He seems to believe that because her title includes the word "counselor," she is every bit as qualified as a real doctor (the fact that most pastoral counselors see people for free probably helps as well, since Chris would never spend part of his precious [[monthly tugboat]] on something useful when there are [[video games]] to buy).

==Effects of Chris's egotism==
Unsurprisingly, Chris's ego has lead to a number of undesirable personality traits, the most important of which are his simple-mindedness and his incredible gullibility. In terms of simple-mindedness, the man is like the Sith: he only deals in absolutes - either you're with him or you're a [[troll]]. This has been very obvious in his answers to the [[Mailbag]], where he refuses to listen to any talk - even from professionals - about the similarities between [[Asperger Syndrome]] and [[autism]], denies that there are any shortcomings in his [[Sonichu (comic)|work]], and shrugs off any advice about how to improve his health or appearance, labelling anyone who suggests he has any kind of shortcoming a [[troll]].

His gullibility is astounding. No matter how many times it's happened before, Chris is easily led around by the nose by trolls promising [[China]] or threatening [[Sonichu]]. The earlier trolling schemes, such as [[Blanca]], [[PandaHalo]] and [[Jimmy Hill]], got Chris to jump through hoops and exposed so much information about Chris and his personality that [[Cwcki| they had to start a wiki to keep track of it all]].

==Ego and the Real World==
{{quote|I'd say... I'd say I'm all around. You see, the problem is that I have too many skills that I am good at. You might say that I am a jack of all trades and a master of none.|Chris, [[Mumble 3]]}}

Chris's ego is one of amazement and wonder for the trolls. From one incident to the next, nothing seems to faze him. Even more amazing is that whenever he attempts to do something, he puts more focus on ''himself'' than the task at hand.

An interesting point Chris likes to make is that he thinks that he is a major celebrity, going so far as to add himself into the [[Wikipedia]] articles for [[Anne Boleyn]], because of some (pretend) ancestry, and [[Vanessa Hudgens]], because of a "hook up" between the two (troll). This was due to Chris somehow believing that he actually had a big fan base for his Sonichu comics, not realizing that, in actuality, they were all trolls. This was made worse when a horrible troll scheme backfired, causing Chris to win the [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes]] without realizing what the actual prize was. Chris now believes he has an army of loyal fans at his beck and call, ready to get rid of [[Clyde Cash|annoying]] [[Vivian Gee|trolls]] or to [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|get rid of videos]].

Another thing that Chris enjoys doing is divulging every last detail about his life. Nothing is too candid for Chris - getting haircuts, drinking his own navy, even giving away his phone number! The only thing he hasn't done with wild abandon is give away his Social Security number and when that happens, look out!

Numerous times, Chris has shown that he believes he has powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal autistics. This line of thinking was caused by Chris's assumption that he had killed [[Ryan Cash]] just by withholding the comic and would worsen when he believed that his [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] actually caused [[Liquid Chris]] to have some sort of horror befall him.

===Examples of Chris's Ego in the Real World===
*[[Manchester High School]] - When Chris graduated from high school, he actually cried because he believed that he deserved a number of artistic awards for his very sub-par work. By his own admission, he also made a scene and ran out after getting his diploma, eventually having to be consoled by both his [[mother]] and gal-pal [[Tiffany Gowen]].
*[[Harvey Birdman Commercial]] - in an attempt to win a contest involving the animated avian lawyer, Chris went to great lengths to talk about himself, his rivalry with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[Sonichu]], but very, ''very'' little about Birdman himself.
*[[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]] - After losing the contest to [[Adam Stackhouse]], Chris would have a major hissy-fit over the loss, proclaiming even the slightest mistake as cheating, despite the fact that Chris himself had broken numerous rules in the process. Even worse, he attempted to fabricate the Playstation webpage to show that he himself had won and not Adam.
*[[Pixelated PS3|Robot Chicken's ''What Would You Do For A PS3'' Contest]] - Chris, when talking about how far he would go to get a PS3, admitted he would ''throw away the cure for autism'' for it.
*[[Wal-Mart]] - When asked to cease his solicitation, Chris refused to budge, rambled on in some stupid speech, and actually ''ran''. He would do this again in a [[Target]] soon after, only to be arrested in the process.
*[[The GAMe PLACe]] - Chris acted in this store as if he owned the place. He was rude with the patrons, abused the access to a flat-screen TV and was an all-around pain for the owner, [[Michael Snyder]]. After much antics, he was banned from the place. Chris filmed a half assed [[Apology to Game & Hobby Place|apology]] nine months later, not because he was sorry for his actions, but because the store was the only place that had [[Eye of Judgement]] cards.
*[[Megan Schroeder]] - For the longest time, Chris actually believed that he and Megan were going out as boyfriend and girlfriend. He even attacked someone for getting near Megan. When the infamous [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] picture was discovered, Chris actually thought that the reason she was upset was because she wasn't used to sexual things. He, then, tried to make Megan believe that the bullying from those amongst [[ED]] was MUCH worse than the fact that he did the picture because he was afraid of trying to rape her. He was also convinced that the main reason she was offended was that she hadn't been exposed to as much pornography as he had. Chris would later blame ED for the fact that he lost her friendship, not caring it was his fault in the first place.
*[[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]] - After being expelled for his [[Chris and anger|appalling behavior]] by the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Student's Dean]], Chris felt the need to write to the Then-Standing President of the United-States, [[George W. Bush]]. The idea that a standing President would be willing to use his clout to reverse a local third-rate college's administrative decision is ludicrous at best.
*[[CWC's Second Message]] - In what would be his opening attack on trying to get the trolls to remove his page following losing Megan, Chris's opening words, amazingly, were:
{{quote|Y'all should know me by now, but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, back on March 17th, 2000.}}
*[[LittleBigPlanet]] - When Chris had shown up on LBP community and posted videos addressed to them, he once again said people "should know him by now". He immediately assumed people would praise him for his levels, especially the "Collector's Case", which he thought was the most original LBP level idea ''ever.''
*[[McIntire Park]] - During a newscast, Chris happened to pass by a cameraman who was videotaping someone being interviewed. As he did, he flashed his Sonichu [[medallion]] as if to say "Hey, look at me! I'm more important!" Sometime later, he appeared in a town hall meeting over the park itself. He flashed his shitty Sonichu and Rosechu drawing trying to save it, then tried to speak, only to be shot down.
*[[For G4's Web Soup|Web Soup]] - When Chris learned that one of his videos was featured on an episode, he took it as a good thing, not realizing that the show made fun of people on the Internet.
*[[10 September 2009]] - Chris, in his ever growing paranoia, automatically assumes that a possible interview from Veronica Belmont of ''Playstation Magazine Europe'' is a troll due to the fact that the person didn't leave a return number, demanding that if she truly wanted to interview him, she should come ''personally'' to his house… then starts trying to suck up to her just in case it wasn't a troll.
*[[Rejected Mailbag]] - Chris hates being proven wrong, especially about Asperger's and Autism being part of the same spectrum. He also takes issue with letters that point out the flaws in his comic pages, which is interesting considering he has no problem telling fans about the flaws he finds in their fan art, calling it "constructive criticism". He's gone from simply ignoring people correcting his mistake to placing these "offending" letters in his rejected mailbag. Even more, when letters start talking about the fact that Autism and Asperger's are similiar, he's begun tossing them into his "Autism Mailbag" and whenever someone tries to mention anything else connected to his past, he automatically goes into a "mental block" and refuses to go any further. On December 5, 2009, Chris wrote a long essay that made little sense, which mainly consisted of him bawwing that he was a unique and special snowflake, and that Aspies are faking fakers that take away the specialness of his autism. Despite autism and Asperger's existing in the populace long before he was born, Chris also states that he [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|"...Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People".]]
*[[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|The Sonichu promotional video]] - In the Part 2 of his video, Chris shows to the camera an elegant drawing of the two main heroes of the comic book made by a fan called Allie. Not only does he proceed to comment "Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her," he present an actual, sub-par copy of the drawing made by himself as a better version.
*[[Chris and copyright|Copyright claim against Vivian Gee]] - Chris issued [[Death threats]] against [[Vivian Gee]] due to the [[Audiobooks]] she made out of his comic. He excused himself a month later and ask for a quote of 25% out of the donations she received for her hard work. It is worth mentioning that the excuse AND the demand for a share of the profits were in the same e-mail, both separated by a single dot.
*[[Mumble 3]] - While talking to Max, Chris tells him that the reason why he doesn't have a job is because he has so many awesome skills, he just can't choose one.
*[[Jimmy Hill]] and [[Liquid Chris]] - While Chris is more than willing to declare Sonichu as a parody so he can make his multimedia franchise, he blows his stack whenever someone ''actually'' parodies Sonichu and himself. He threatened "legal action" during the Jimmy Hill saga and went all out to prove himself the TRUE and HONEST Chris when Liquid showed up. During the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]], when Liquid threatened to go to the police over the Gun Comic, Chris was certain that the police would be more concerned over the fact that someone was impersonating him than the fact that he threatened to murder him.
*[[Father Call]] - When talking to [[Kacey]]'s father, his ego clashed horribly against Matt's attempts to get through to his head, comparing losing a loved one to Chris losing his [[Patti|dog]], declaring that mowing the lawn (a menial task at that) was tough work and utterly missing various cues to people's hardships, such as when Matt told him that his mother pulled weeds while inflicted with arthritis, Chris could only apologize for her having arthritis, not be impressed by the feat.
*[[Sonichu's Edge|Chris]] [[CWCFighter|and]] [[51 50|exercise]] - Many times, Chris has shown his attempts at exercising or performing some sort of strenuous feat. He considered [[Power|lifting up a chair]] to be a great feat of strength, thought that lifting two 12-pack boxes was akin to lifting two 50-pound weights and even showed his "amazing" Parkay skills.
*[[Chris and Wikipedia|Chris and famous people]] - Chris has compared himself to [[Hotel Ricky Ricardo|Leonardo DaVinci and Michaelangelo]] in artistic ability. He has also compared himself in ability or personality to President [[Barack Obama]], [[SingStar Challenge|Frank Sinatra]], [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|Bing Crosby]], [[Red Skelton]], Dick van Dyke, [[I Love Lucy|Ricky Ricardo]], and Jaleel White (who voiced Sonic the Hedgehog). He has also compared himself to many fictional characters such as [[Transformers|Optimus Prime]], [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], [[CWC Fighter|Chun-Li]], Homer Simpson and [[Family Guy|Peter Griffin]]. Since [[Chandler Family Tree|free-riding on someone else's talents]] is nothing new for Chris, He saw no issue into incorporating known people in [[Chandler Family Tree|his family tree]]. This is how [[Anne Boleyn]], [[Daniel Weston]] and an unknown [[Cherokian Clan]] appeared in his ancestry for no logical reason whatsoever. He pushed the audacity to edit many [[Wikipedia]] pages to validate his hubris. All entries have been redacted and he was banned from the site.
*[[Chris E-Mails]] - Chris's massive ego manifests itself eagerly through his correspondence with other people. For example, he e-mailed the O'Reilly Factor, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News at least twice, telling them about his Encyclopedia Dramatica page. Not only did he outright expect them to report on it and give it extensive television coverage, but he expected the FBI (which he also believed was apparently part of the crew for the news shows) to go after Jason Kendrick Howell. Other examples include that while he apologized to Megan for drawing [[shecameforcwc.jpg]], he told her that she owed him money and that he tried to coax [[Anna McLerran]] and Megan into vandalizing his ED page for him. He also believed that people thought their ranking on his [[Scale of Respect]] was of the utmost importance, as illustrated by his correspondence with Mary Lee Walsh.
*[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)|Chris and his ED Page]] - Since Chris is a known narcissistic loon, he never liked mirrors of any kind. When the [[Jason Kendrick Howell|nice folks]] of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] found him, they couldn't resist the urge to satirize his own existense. The said article turned into a circus in which [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|he tried to retract, modify, erase]] and even supply the page with [[shecameforcwc.jpg|new]] [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!|material]]. In 17 [[December 2009]], he went as far as copying the main article page out of [[ED]] and edited out at his convenience<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Chris_chan]</ref>.
*[[CWCipedia|Chris and his own webpage]] - When Chris was given his own webpage, he found himself bombarded with gay ads, all paid for by [[Jack Thaddeus]]. After dealing with this for months on end, Chris has finally had enough and proclaimed that he wrote to currently-standing President Barack Obama in an attempt to make gay ads illegal, despite that that fact that kind of ad is still protected under free speech and even if he got the letter, there's a slim (read: zero) chance that Obama will actually listen to his whiny, fat ass. While addressing the matter, Chris proclaims himself ''the captain of this boat'' and says that without him, CWCipedia would not exist, implying that he does all the hard work on the website, ignoring all Sysop's effort. In fact, CWCipedia is a privilege given to Chris and not at all something that he came up with. Chris has taken this to an absolute extreme, going as far as to suggest that he is the "Captain" of CWCipedia.
*[[Chris and Health]] - Chris hates to be called fat. Deep in his mind, he honestly thinks he's the same somewhat skinny child he was ten years ago, despite the fact that he has a gut and his hairline's retreating at an alarming rate. While he refuses to accept his baldness, he actually is claiming to be working on his gut. Beyond that, he refuses professional psychological help and honestly believes stuff such as autism and homosexuality are easily caught diseases.
*[[Homos|Homosexuality]] - As mentioned above, Chris actually believes that homosexuality is a disease like AIDS or even the common cold. In his comics, he takes a page out of [[Family Guy]] and helps create the cure for homosexuality. Since it questions his own sexuality, he seeks to punish those who are in same-sex relations within CWCVille as well.

==Chris's ego in the [[Comic]]==

''See also'': [[Sub-Episodes]]

While [[Issue 0]] and [[Issue 1]] do focus on Sonichu, [[Chris-Chan]] takes over as the main character throughout [[Issue 2]], [[Issue 5]], [[Sonichu 6|Issue 6]] and [[Sonichu 7|Issue 7]], with [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] as a supporting character, and even when he does appear, he's shouting some retarded praises about Chris. [[Sonichu 8|Issue 8]] and [[Sonichu 9|Issue 9]] sees ''Sonichu'' taking back his major role as the main character, but he's basically just a Mary-Sue analogy for Chris. He also portrays himself as skinny and handsome (although this doesn't happen till said ''Issue 2''). and will pull powers out of his ass. He even makes several episodes that dramatize events he had in real-life, with the extreme self indulging fantasies that are described below:

Chris's ego is in full bloom in the comics. The name of the city in which he and his Electric Hedgehog Pokemon strive to protect is known as CWCVille. The city's major currency is C-Quarters and W-Quarters. One of the major drinks in this city is known as CWC Cola. The Sonichus and Rosechus he created proclaim him "father". No one in his city cares if he slacks off from his job as Mayor. He even goes so far as to proclaim that there are no elections when he proclaims [[BILLY MAYS]] is NOT the TRUE and HONEST mayor of CWCville.

===Instances of Chris's ego in the comics===

*'''[[Sonichu 1]]:''' While this is the smallest amount of screen time he's ever had in the comics, he generally steals the scene to himself, Sonichu tries to make a point about how "[[lie|creative]]" the comics are if that, and generally trying to make it seem like he deserves a girlfriend for drawing this retarded piece of [[fail]].
*'''[[Sonichu 2]]:''' His portrayal of [[Wes-Li Sonichu|Wes-Li]] counts, despite not really knowing Chris in [[Chris and Reality|real life]] he still gets portrayed as a villain. He also openly admitted he didn't want Sarah to see anyone else in a text-walling portion of the comic, yet still calls Wes-Li greedy for not wanting to be a part in CWC's retarded conversations. He also draws [[Sarah]] pinning Wes-Li to a tree & breaking up with him, [[Fail|just because she thought Chris <s>being jealous of her</s> was sweet]]. He is also drawn whining about how he lost Sarah, and essential tells Wes to "buck up", even though he's the first one to make a scream [[Hannah|when he lost a one-time date]]. [[Mary Lee Walsh]] also appears as a villain.
*'''[[Sonichu 3]]:''' This issue has a semi-fictionalized account of an incident Chris had with the managers of McDonald's. He was loitering and soliciting, and they threw him out. In his comic book, however, Chris exclaims that the Jerkops are conspiring against him, preventing him from finding true love. He turns into <s>a furfag</s> [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] and defeats them with the help of [[Darkbind Sonichu]], who admits he only helped because Chris was his creator.
[[Image:Issue4.jpg|thumb|An entire book of Chris hurting people he hates]]
*'''[[Sonichu 4]]:''' It's all about Chris here. Sonichu and Rosechu are nowhere to be seen, except for one cameo each in separate sub-episodes. This issue was all about Chris's semi-fictionalized misadventures at Wal-Mart, Target and McDonald's, and pitted him constantly against the Jerkops and Mary Lee Walsh, for they dare to interfere with his [[Love Quest]]. Unlike IRL, Chris can (and does) pwn them in the fantasy world of his comics. This issue also includes the account of Chris's encounter with IRL troll [[Hannah]], who raised his [[heart level]] to 100% just to smash it down to 15%.
*'''[[Sonichu 5]]:''' This issue has Chris write Sarah Hammer out of the comic so he could focus exclusively on [[Megan Schroeder]], the new object of his desire. While Sarah did marry a man named [[William Spicer]], Chris was not present at her wedding, and had never met Spicer, as he was represented in the comic by a generic [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] character. The next episode has Chris fawning over Megan, and she over him. However, in reality, Megan saw Chris only as a friend, and was constantly rebuffing his advances. The episode features two different endings because Megan either did not like the original ending or objected to being featured in the comic at all.
*'''[[Sonichu 6]]:''' The [[Patti Chandler]] Memorial Issue, where his dead dog becomes a member of CWCville. In the only other episode in this issue, Chris has [[Bionic]] ask him to create a sweetheart for him, but Chris, being a lazy fuck, hooks him up with Megan's character, [[Megagi]]. Chris would later claim Megan's character as his own.
[[Image:Sammyandchris.jpg|thumb|Chris as he is vs. Chris as he sees himself.]]
*'''[[Sonichu 7]]:''' Chris is envious of Bionic's ability to screw Megagi until Megan holds his hand, again implying romance where none exists. This issue contains the stupid time-travel plot where they go back in time to the the moment Chris created Bionic, and the scene randomly segues into a [[Family Guy]] style scene he gives Seth McFarlane full permission to use (Coincidentally, or not, the first few minutes of the ''Road to Germany'' episode of Family Guy bears a close resemblance to this "skitch"). After Chris gets trapped in the time void, he mixes both fake memories from the comic with real ones, like Megan "dumping" him and his denial of having drawn [[Shecameforcwc.jpg]] (he blames it on [[ED]], even though he was the one that drew it and uploaded it onto that site), Mary Lee Walsh's invasion of CWCville and her defeat at the hands of the Sonichus and Rosechus, and [[Joshua Martinez]] hooking him up with [[Vanessa Hudgens]]. In the other episode, he introduces his Sweetheart-of-the-moment Blanca and her creation [[Jiggliami]] (who Chris would later claim as his own), as well as featuring an interview with anti-troll [[Robert Simmons V]] about how awesome Chris is.
[[Image:Momentary Escape.JPG|thumb|Chris rends space time asunder to punch some guy.]]
*'''[[Sonichu 8]]:''' While free of Chris the character, the comic was not free of Chris's warped psyche. He drew a sex scene between Sonichu and Rosechu for no other reason than to draw porn of his characters, and gave a detailed account of their reproductive systems. Remember, Sonichu is supposed to be a children's comic, as Chris has stated numerous times. After having his characters have sex for the fifty billionth time, he inserts the hideous [[Rule 34]] he drew into the storyline by having Rosechu come across it while using the internet. In a blatant display of Mary Sueism, Chris uses Sonichu to comment on his hideous drawings by saying that they are "so lifelike", and he also has Sonichu gag and barf at the sight of fan drawings from Chris's ED page of Rosechu with a "pickle". Next there are multiple (traced) nude images of Rosechu, which the plot indicates is to prove that she doesn't have a "pickle". Later on, after Sonichu and Rosechu storm [[4-cent_garbage.com]] (which is a thinly veiled portrayal of ED), she strips again and face-rapes [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] (the guy who created Chris's ED page), putting him into a state close to death. Even later, all the Rosechus in the comics decide to strip for "[[Women's Rights]]"...well, all except [[Zapina|one underaged one]], who can't strip because of the "[[Chris and sex#pedophilia|dumb laws]]". It must be noted that this entire storyline was a result of Chris being trolled hard by the people over at ED, who drew fan art of Rosechu with a dick to make Chris RAGE...and RAGE he did. An epilogue has former sweetheart [[Sarah Jackson]] killed by [[Optimus Prime]]; another former sweetheart, [[Blanca]], returned to Kentucky and her boyfriend (which makes no fucking sense storyline wise; truth is that she was a troll and Chris failed at writing her out); a two sentence memorial to [[Ryan Cash]]; and a dedication to Sweetheart-of-the-moment [[PandaHalo]].
[[Image:Billboard.JPG|thumb|They're better off without him.]]
*'''[[Sonichu 9]]:''' Lacking Sonichu to use as his mouthpiece, Chris invented [[Reginald Sneasel]] to use as his stand-in during the first episode, and Reginald even goes to retarded lengths to break up a romance between [[Punchy]] and [[Layla]] in a similar way that Chris meddled with Wes and Sarah. After Reginald's plan fails, [[Angelica Rosechu]] approaches him, and they quickly jump into the sack together, echoing Chris's own belief that the woman must make the first move (out of pity) and put out as soon as possible. This episode also introduces Chris's retarded [[Dating Education]] concept and applies it to his characters. Chris also inserts his Sweetheart-of-the-moment [[Ivy]] into the comics in a plotline that goes nowhere, and has a thinly-veiled version of former sweetheart Sarah Jackson as the Date Ed teacher. Chris then makes a callous reference to Sarah's death by Optimus Prime via a representation of her sister [[Rita]]. When Rita informs the class about her sister's death, the assorted characters appear to not give a fuck, nor do they make any attempt to console the poor grieving woman that is now stuck teaching their class. Also in Sonichu 9, Chris depicts PandaHalo dying in a fire. He seems to think this is a fitting tribute. He also shopped a caricature of himself onto a billboard in the background, with a caption begging him to return to the mayor's office. Recent additions have shown the addition of a Power Rangers team, the CWC-Power Rangers, as well as a gruesome description of Ivy dying by being hanged as well as BILLY MAYS falling to his death trying to save her.
*'''[[Sonichu 10]]''' With Chris back in the saddle, he proceed with his master plan to get rid of all of those who troubled him in real life. Even worse, he apparently was able to deceive his future wife into think he was his future self and did the nasty with her. On top of this, he proclaims that he helped create the cure for <s>autism</s> homosexuality and plans to bring about straightness by stealing all those vaccines, bringing them to the present and distributing them right there! Chris-Chan Sonichu defeats some "devil trolls", but can't resist imitating Zorro and spelling "CWC" in the air with his epic blows and kicks (this could be a trifecta: unoriginal, egoistic ''and'' physically implausible). As the comic continues on, he attacks the [[4-cent_garbage]] HQ, he uses the characters [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] and [[Beel]] to condemn [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Jack Thaddeus]] for being homo trolls who "slander and tarnish an innocent man's good name", the proceeds to make the latter two jump to their deaths, just as he wishes.
*'''[[Sonichu Special 4]]:''' Chris steals [[Kacey]] from [[Liquid]] for "not treating her right", bursts into the house (note that Kacey doesn't seem to be in any real danger), and friggin' shoots a disarmed Liquid with a [[Megatron pistol|gun]], and draws Kacey's military family telling [[lies|praises]] about Chris, and generally negative comments towards Liquid.

==References==
<references/>

{{Incomplete}}

{{Chris and}}

Chris and death

2010-01-07T17:52:11Z

Pugs Malone: /* Patti Chandler (1988-2006) */

[[Image:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|right|Rest in peace?]]
'''Death''' stalks [[Chris]] at every turn, and as a result he is really poor when it comes to understanding and/or coping with death, be it the death of a human or an [[Patti Chandler|animal]].

His poor reactions to death most likely come from Chris's lack of empathy, and his incredibly underdeveloped mind. Kids often don't understand death until they're quite old, around 10-12 years; before that, they just think it's "like sleeping forever" or "just leaving." Chris, being a
<s>7-year-old kid</s> 2-year-old toddler inside, can only resort to these clumsy analogies to sort of understand death; he even has a habit of appealing to dead people to "come back."<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands Or Buts#A history (6:02 to 9:34)]]: "Patti, I miss you. Come home."</ref><ref>[[:Image:SchuComic9P31.jpg]]: "Dedicated to Mr. Billy Mays II; Please Come Back Soon."</ref>

It could be that the only shows that Chris watched that dealt with death in any way had plot devices to facilitate the return of the departed. Chris, who is unable to connect cause with effect and considers behaviors from fiction to be interchangeable with reality, may simply assume that the dead can come back whenever they want.

Here are the departed souls, in order from earliest to latest:

==Deaths==
===Every single fucking victim of the World Trade Center attacks (-2001)===
In the [[Twin Falling Towers]] video of the first of [[November 2009]], Chris makes fun of [[Clyde]] and says that he is as weak as the Twin Towers. He then shows the mouse cursor crashing into the buildings, complete with sound effects. This has shocked many, including somebody who lost a loved one in the attacks<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCDjrjr3b7M]</ref> and this could possibly be the lowest that Chris has ever gone.

===[[Patti Chandler]] (1988-2006)===
Patti was Chris's dog, and she died in June 2006. Chris [http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/User:AZT-13/Chris-chan_Emails_Part_IV apparently drew a picture of a crying Sonichu face] on the signature confirming the euthanasia process. As seen in the image used in this article, [[Patti-Chan|Patti also appeared in the comic, immortalized as an anthro]]. This is particularly disturbing in that Chris has apparently decided to deny his dog the afterlife that he presumably believes in, in favor of locking her in his own personal hell, in which she will only exist when he can be bothered to draw her. Effectively, he's stolen and erased her soul.

To Chris, her death is the greatest tragedy of his life, which he often compares to the deaths of other peoples' family members and loved ones. Not surprisingly, every single person he has said this to has become horribly offended, yet he continues to use this example.

Oddly enough, Patti may have been the only being Chris ever cared about. Supporting this is a report that Chris periodically broke down in tears for as many as six months after her death.{{cite}} By comparison, the "death" of any [[Troll|Sweetheart]] will result in a day of mourning if they are lucky.

===RocketFox's Dad (1966-2008)===
RocketFox's Dad used to be an [[alcohol]]ic, but recovered and stayed sober for ten years. However, his liver failed and he passed away in mid-October 2008. When RocketFox asked Chris for advice on how to cope, Chris considered it an "accident" and went on a spiel about how bad alcohol was.<ref>[[IRC (16 October 2008)]]</ref> This is actually the first death during the [[troll]]ing, and it was mentioned to Chris to see how he would react to such news, and as mentioned, Chris did so poorly. [[Ryan]]'s death and Chris's reaction cemented this. About eight months later, Chris [[Chris's Big Night Out|became a huge hypocrite]]...

===[[Sarah Jackson]] (1981-2008)===
A former [[Sweetheart|heartsweet]] of Chris (and Decepticon) who was killed in a <strike>car crash</strike> carefully executed plan by [[Optimus Prime]]. SPOILERS: A [[troll]]. Sarah Jackson, like Patti, was used in his comic for a while as "Ms. Jackaras" in [[Sonichu 9]]. Unlike Patti, Ms. Jackaras gets the same fate as her non-comic counterpart, and is replaced by her sister, who continues the lesson anyway. None of the Sonichu characters mourn the loss of their professor. Sound like [[Chris|someone]]?

===[[Ryan Cash]] (1996-2008)===
Ryan was [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]]'s brother who was a huge fan of [[Sonichu]]. After the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]] were delayed over and over, Ryan fell into a depression and committed suicide. [[Captain's Log, Stardate December 28th, 2008|Chris, of course, reacted to this in an inconsiderate manner, telling Clyde and his family to "just move on."]]

===[[PandaHalo]]===
Despite her being thousands of kilometers away from the brushfires, Chris assumed PandaHalo was dead. She is actually alive and kicking but Chris still doesn't know this. Two days after her "death," he went to find another [[sweetheart]] to [[Mass debating|mass debate]] to. This flagrant disrespect <s>baffles trolls to this day, as the death of a partner can take years of recovery, and a long time before one would even consider dating again</s> shouldn't surprise anyone because Chris is a self-centered asshole. This saga ''further'' proved that Chris has no sense of empathy or respect for the dead.

Nine months later, [[Sonichu 9]] featured a special "memorial" to PandaHalo and a sequence in which she dies (off-screen) in a building fire after saving her "Pokemon", [[Chloe Rosechu]] and [[BlazeBob Sonichu]], so they wouldn't "burn with" her. Apparently, Chris didn't feel like he needed to honor the life of his beloved [[sweetheart]] and instead depicted her horrible, fiery death. He also has to mention that she "burned," which shows how he doesn't realize how painful and awful it would be to die in a fire. It's also not a term that anyone would use to describe the death of a loved one, providing more evidence of how little he actually cared about her. Because it took nine months to "honor" her death, he most likely decided he needed more god-awful characters for his shitty comic, was too lazy to create a new recolor and chose to use Chloe and BlazeBob, thus reminding him of PandaHalo, who he had likely forgotten, and made him decide to feature a memorial to her.

===[[Sarah May]]===
After being called "[[Julie]]" multiple times, Sarah May [[Troll|attempted suicide]] over [[Mumble_8|Mumble]]. Immediately after she went offline, rather than express any concern or try to find a way to stop her, Chris told Julie (who was also in the chat), "I still have you," with a completely emotionless "oh well" attitude. Julie was playing along with Chris, and did not react to Sarah's suicide attempt in any human-like fashion either; yet, it did not occur to Chris that Julie's behavior was ''in any way'' unnatural. Chris then made an [[CWC Shout Out to Sarah May|immature shout-out to her on a YouTube video]], with tears faker than all his [[sweetheart]]s combined. His reason for her to hold on? Because he'd be so sad without her. While mentioning the feelings of friends and families despair is typical in suicide prevention, Chris did it in such a selfish way, only thinking of how ''he'd'' feel, not how ''her'' family and friends would feel, that it was just full of [[fail]] and narcissism.

===[[Aunt Corrina]] (1936-2009)===
Chris's aunt Corrina had her funeral on Chris's birthday, which was also Shrove Tuesday, a Christian holiday that involves eating pancakes.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shrove_Tuesday</ref> Needless to say, Chris cared more about the pancakes than the funeral of his own aunt. Patti was also obtained from her (see the e-mail link above).

When the "I know how to be sad because my dog died" excuse fails, Chris usually follows up with an offhand mention of his Aunt Corrina. If that fails the deaths of his many sweethearts tends to follow, although any normal human would bring those up first and the dog would be lucky to get a mention at all.

===[[Clyde Cash]] (1976-<s>2009</s>)===
In early 2009, Christian once seemed to be aware that Clyde Cash was supposedly dead, but casted a slight bit of doubt over the idea. Regardless, he [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursed]] Clyde in [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 18th, 2009]], just in case. He's back.

===[[BILLY MAYS]] (1958-2009)===
In the video [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009]], Chris only seems to be upset over people blaming him for Mays' death, and loudly denies that he was ever the mayor of [[Cwcville]]. He doesn't even offer his condolences to Mays' family. Down the line, Chris selfishly adopts the idea that Mays was in fact his bodyguard and he died protecting Chris. He goes even further by stating that he was also his identical body double and "without the beard we'd look the same". At least he's admitting that he's overweight.

In [[Sonichu 9]], Chris slaps in a one-page intro with Billy saying that he was never was the mayor, but was part of Chris's group. At the bottom was a message from Chris, asking him to "come back soon". Ninety pages later, we find out that Billy had died falling down an elevator shaft, attempting to free Ivy from HER gruesome death.

===[[Ivy]] (1992-2009)===
Former [[troll|sweetheart]] Ivy committed suicide after not being allowed to see Chris. Chris uploaded the [[CWC "Boyfriend"]] video as a memorial. Yes, a poorly sung remake of Avril Lavigne's happy, bouncy pop/punk song, with lyrics changed to be about how much Chris would like women to date him. Unless the original was somehow Ivy's favorite song, this is just short of "Another One Bites the Dust" as one of the worst possible songs one can dedicate to a recently deceased loved one. Chris included pictures of several past sweethearts in the video, making it less of a tribute to Ivy and mor of a monument to Chris's [[fail]].

Furthermore, as is unquestionably appropriate, Ivy's tragic demise was incorporated into [[Sonichu 9|Issue 9]] of the comic. Rather than admit to having a hand in her suicide, Chris conjures up a magnificently gruesome accidental death, which involved having gotten her neck broken with elevator wires after falling through the elevator floor. Although this is a particularly troubling manipulation of what really happened, Chris more than makes up for it with gravitas; he gracefully, albeit belatedly, offers a tiny orange box in memory to Ivy 'O'Niel', taking pride of place underneath a backshot of Slaweel and some weird faux-Tranformers actions. All of the above shows the leaps and bounds Chris has made in his appropriate handling of tragic deaths.

===[[Bob|Bob Chandler]] and [[Barbara Chandler]]===
Coming soon... Both are well into their "Silver Years" and suffering from many heath issues, compounded by their age. It doesn't help that they're [[Tour of Chris's House|living in a landfill]].

==="Mary Jo"===

In a [[mailbag 27| recent mailbag]], Chris was asked by a troubled [[troll|fan]] what he should do after the death of his beloved Mary Jo.

{{quote|Mary Jo is gone (I feel for you), but you should move on and try to find another woman who will treat you about as good, or possibly better than, her. Suck it up, and move on like a Man would. I tell you as a Man who had to do the same thing a few times in the past too.| Chris, being super-sensitive.}}

Chris clearly states how he believes a death should be approached by a man (which includes finding another [[sweetheart|woman]] right away and a specific lack of grieving), and tells the traumatized fan that he should simply move onto a better woman since his girlfriend's death, not only being completely asinine, but also outlining that he believes women to be [[women's rights|replaceable and possibly interchangeable]].

==See also==
*[[Autism]]
*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Lack of empathy]]
*[[Death threats]]

==References==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Dead]]

Clyde Cash

2010-01-06T17:34:47Z

Pugs Malone: /* In the comic */

[[Image:TheRealClydeCash.jpg|thumb|right|The real Clyde Cash, according to Chris.]]
[[Image:GaySpiderMan.jpg|thumb|right|Clyde Cash and his buddy [[Jack Thaddeus|Jack]].]]

{{quote|Yer butt's gonna be in trouble|[[Barbara Chandler]] on Clyde Cash}}
{{quote|I'LL STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH!|[[Chris]] on Clyde Cash}}
{{quote|Then the dragon stood on the sand of the seashore. I saw a beast coming out of the sea. It had ten horns, seven heads, and ten royal crowns on its horns. On its heads were blasphemous names.|The Bible on Clyde Cash}}

'''Clyde Cash''' (alias '''Gregg Mays''' - that's [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|Gregg with three g's]]) ([[Wikipedia:Born on the Fourth of July|04 July]] [[Wikipedia:1976|1976]] - <strike>22 [[May 2009]]</strike>) was the older brother of [[Ryan Cash]] who decided to take vengeance against Chris after his brother killed himself. He was the former leader of [[The Miscreants]]. His close friend is [[Bryan Bash]], he once employed [[The Man in the Pickle Suit]] (Jew variety) and his cousin is [[Vivian Gee]].

'''He's back.'''

== Acts of grievances ==
[[Image:ChrisVSClyde.JPG|thumb|Artist's interpretation of the epic struggle.]]

Clyde's first act was to rape [[Panda]] but it did absolutely nothing to Chris as he simply moved onto the next [[gal-pal]]. Then, he posed as Gregg Mays (a web designer working for [[Nintendo]]) to gain access to [[Sonichu.net]]. Holding the site for ransom, he told Chris to make a video proclaiming he was gay. He then told him to make a [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|video declaring his straightness]]. Eventually, Chris regained access to the site. Striking again, Clyde worked with a [[troll]] and got rid of the domain. Chris, being resilient, bought Sonichu.info. With the help of Panda, Clyde managed to gain access again.

It was around this time that [[Takashi Tezuka]] and [[Jay Z]] were doing their ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' game project. Clyde then decided to make things more interesting and posed as [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] to destroy any chance of the project. Teaming up with [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]], they created the [[Miyamoto Saga]].

[[Julie]] set up a [[Mumble]] chat in which Chris could communicate with [[Trolls|true and honest Sonichu fans]]. Clyde stalked Julie while infiltrating these chats to confront Chris. He began throwing demands to Chris such as [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 10th, 2009|cleaning his room]]. Chris at the same time also bought SonichuandRosechu.com. Clyde got access yet again, this time with the help of Julie. In the end, it was revealed that Julie was a 13 year old boy and that Clyde had staged the whole thing.

After that, he sent out his trusted [[Man in the Pickle Suit|Jew friend]] to scout out Chris's whereabouts. The Jew turned [[Robert Simmons V]] into a troll and infiltrated the church. He then stole Chris's one and only date, [[Emily]].

When [[Ivy]] came along, he decided to continually harass her and despite Chris making a few threats, Ivy eventually gave in and killed herself.

Oh, and Clyde also hacked into the [[PSN]] a few times. But then [[Jack Thaddeus]] did him one better...

And to think all this was done due to Chris not caring about one fan's tragic suicide.

<strike>On 23 May 2009, Clyde was found lying in a pool of blood, dead from (possibly) committing suicide with a shotgun (though foul play has not yet been ruled out, due to Chris's recent death threats). He is survived by his cousin, [[Vivian Gee]].

Some folks say they see Clyde's and Ryan's spirit haunting the world together. The Miscreants are totally not keeping up appearances if you see Clyde anywhere...</strike>

In Chris's revised Encyclopedia Dramatica page, Clyde is referred to as a "Starscream troll". This is a reference to the Transformer's character Starscream, who would often switch sides or plot to overthrow Megatron behind the scenes. Chris says this because Clyde Cash killed [[BlueSpike]].

==In the comic==
[[Image:CWCsClyde.jpg|thumb|left|Clyde, left, with [[Ivy]]]]
In the [[comic]] Cly(de) is a villain working for [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. Apart from capturing [[Ivy]] and getting into a fight with Chris, he has only appeared on [[CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero]], officially [[Sonichu Special 1]]. Not much is known about Clyde, other than he lives in a mansion and owns a pickle gun and "slander ray."

He makes his first full appearance in [[Sonichu 10]] as the 4-cent_garbage building is collapsing. When [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] escapes, he condemns him and [[Jack Thaddeus]] for being homo trolls. When Beel escapes, he, too, condemns the two for their actions, saying that being homo trolls that are "slandering and tarnishing a innocent man's good name" is just as evil as being an assistant for Adolf Hitler. With no option left, Clyde and Jack jump into the 66+6 story elevator shaft to their suicidal deaths.

== Currently ==
[[Image:325504 - Chris-chan clyde cash.jpg|thumb|[[Homos|STRAIGHT ANGER]]]]
{{incomplete}}
After Clyde faked his death for reasons unknown, he came back with a vengeance for some reason. Chris is not very pleased.

When not battling [[Liquid Chris]] for the hand of [[Kacey]], Chris spends his time trying to convince Clyde Cash, alias Gregg Mays (or "Gregg Mays, alias Clyde Cash," depending on which name he remembers first) to face him in one on one battle. Chris has recorded several [[I AM STRONG|feats]] [[11042009 51 50|of]] [[30 Push-Ups|strength]] through a combination of Kacey trying to get him to get into [[obesity|shape]] and a desire to frighten Clyde with his [[Chris and Health|bulging muscles]].

He had a picture to blackmail Clyde, but ultimately nothing came of it other than a [[ClydeGoingOnGregg1|series]] [[Clyde's Buddy Matt Getting SUPER-LAID!!!|of]] [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|videos]] [[Getting Foam Ed|where]] Chris [[Twin Falling Towers|tries]] [[It will never end|to]] [[Apology for 9/11 Joke|torture]] Clyde. Clyde scoffed at the [[No More Jokes|final video]].

However, because of the negative reaction to [[Sonichu Special 4]], Chris, in the [[CWCipedia]] mailbag, makes clear that he would only [[lies|sit and talk cooperatively with Clyde to get him to stop harassing him]].

==See also==
*[[A CWC Audition]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/TheGreggMays Gregg's YouTube account]
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash Clyde's new YouTube account]
*<strike>[http://www.youtube.com/user/clydethecash Clyde's YouTube account]</strike>
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?jmmyzlznhfa Post-date conversations] (part with Clyde begins at about 4:35)
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiTVga0G8Ws Chris-Chan KILLED Clyde Cash (Never Before Seen Footage)]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73jIxs5yQLg Chris-chan Loves Clyde Cash]

{{Trolls}}

[[Category:Dead]]
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

Chris and money

2010-01-05T00:53:21Z

Pugs Malone: /* In other works */

It's obvious that [[Chris]] himself has no grasp on the real value of '''money''', since he actively wastes as much of his [[monthly tugboat]] as possible on luxuries like [[Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[PS3|video games]], and, more recently, [[alcohol]]. He also once, when giving out the laws of [[CWCville]], equated 10 years in prison to a $1,500 fine.

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer. His PSN account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' PS3 game that he's ever purchased. All the while, Chris buys his clothes at second-hand discount thrift stores.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed! ==

Chris is what most would call a welfare leech. Chris's only source of income is the $800 [[monthly tugboat|"tugboat"]] that he receives from the federal government every month. Chris's parents take $450 to pay for room and board.<ref>Miyamoto Saga</ref>

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. |Chris, completely deluded.}}

It appears that [[Bob]] encourages Chris not to get a job, as it would void his Social Security status. Bob's encouragement indicates one of two things: he knows his son is a [[fail|failure]] and wants him to stop trying, or he's instructing Chris on being a parasite.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle money, Chris has an unhealthy fixation on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff; and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond.

==Credit cards==

As surprising as it is that Chris has his own credit cards, it is equally unsurprising how unwisely he uses them. Chris has managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (according to [[Mumble 4]], 1000 of which comes from the PSN store, but this number has increased over the past few weeks) and has even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his were maxed out. Being the greedy twat that he is, when Chris finally does make payments towards his debts, he always does so in the smallest installments possible, freeing himself to spend as much as he has (or more) on worthless [[LittleBigPlanet|shit]], entirely oblivious to the fact that he's only increasing his debt by letting interest charges rack up. Economists are currently working on the theory that it is Chris's debts, not the collapse of financial institutions, which have caused the current global financial crisis.

==Debtors==

Based on current projections, it won't be long before the repo men are called in and Chris is forced to forfeit his [[PlayStation 3|shit]]. And considering that Chris has an unnatural obsession with his worthless crap we can expect a lot of BAWWWWING when the day comes. We eagerly await the inevitable inclusion of the Jerkollectors, or perhaps the Repo Gang, in future comics. Debt, like anything else that represents a challenge to his [[Autism|ignorant bliss]], is just another example of the world trying to keep him down.

If only he had taken money from the loan sharks, maybe then would they beat the crap out of his HFA ass <s>and teach him a lesson on the value of the dollar.</s> Nope, Chris would only continue spending and <s>maybe</s> definitely bitch about it on [[YouTube]].

==In the comic==

In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely, all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris IRL. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the American populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21|"paid" in average of $3,500 a month just to hang around]].

This, along with what else we know about CWCville, could mean that Chris is a communist, or at the very least, a socialist. Of course, he's most likely too much of a retard to actually know what that means.

In [[Sonichu 9|Episode 19]] it's shown that CWCVille actually uses their own currency, in the form of C Quarters, W Quarters, and C Quarters. 10 C Quarters make up a W Quarter, and 10 W Quarters make up a C Quarter. Don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, especially considering [[Fail|what the word 'quarter' means]].

==In other works==

Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American Social Security system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]". This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels. |Chris with a very bad idea...}}

So, what is a "Soup Hotel"? Chris describe it in the [[Mailbag 20]] as a building ten stories floor tall with 10 to 20 rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, bed, lighting and Cable TV. Of course, the homeless will stay there for free. So, instead of building Homeless shelthers with domitories, commons rooms and shared TV sets, Chris think the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a Bona-Fide hotel. This means that, in CWCville, there's around 1000-2000 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, chocked by heavy taxes needed to pay those [[Monthly Tugboat|social expenses]], are unable to make a profit there and are moving away.

In [[Mailbag 29]] he states that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of [[CWCville|state-run]] brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp (which would be a redundant middleman in a state-approved brothel), pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free Sex Ed classes for virgins. In real life, Chris tried to [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|scam free sex]] out of a Craigslist prostitute by telling her about his many personal problems. The prostitute then hung up on him.

==See also==

*[[Monthly tugboat]] - what Chris calls his welfare check.

==Sauce==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Bruce Johnson

2010-01-04T20:39:43Z

Pugs Malone: /* Debate */

Dr. '''Bruce Johnson''' was the principal of [[Chris]]'s elementary school and a supposed [[homos|homosexual]]. [[Bob Chandler]] hated his guts. [[Chris]] claims to have hated sitting on his lap, giving him his homophobia. In reality, the Chandler family's conflict with Dr. Johnson was about his desire to send Chris to an institution because of Chris's dangerous behavior.

{{quotebox|The Principle of the [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Nathanel Greene Elemetary School[sic]]], Dr. Johnson, was a Homo, and when I was sent to his office; he picked me up, set me on his lap, then I would always get off his lap, because I ALWAYS HATED that; I felt bad vibes back then. Fortunately, it has never gone beyond that, and my father caught his intentions on that, and the Court Battles Started. He likely exagerates[sic], but my father knew that there were a bunch of homos within that school board, and that was why they hated me and my family, in addition to those people not understanding Autism. Anyway, from those past memories, that is why I have grown up to Rarely Associate with men, and why I DESPIE THE HOMOS the Worst.}}

==Debate==

Chris claims that this is the event that caused his family to move to another school; however, Bob Chandler revealed to Emily that they threatened to send Chris to an institution which is why they move, and stated in a [[IT_TOOK_A_TALKING_BEAR_TO_GIVE_THE_NAME_A_YOUNG_BOY_LOVES|newspaper article]] in 1993 that "The Greene County School system was not equipped to teach an autistic child."

The validity of this story is questionable.

The most obvious problem is how an openly homosexual man in the conservative fundamentalist [[Wikipedia:Southern United States|South]] would be able to secure a job as principal of a small town elementary school without being lynched. So what's the likelihood of there being ''several'' openly homosexual and lesbian faculty members under the same roof?

Bob, being old fashioned (keyword ''old''), [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijbovskICjk probably still thinks "homosexual" and "pedophile" are interchangeable]. How an openly homosexual man would even exist (we're assuming they'd get out of Dodge as fast as possible), let alone ''survive'' in the conservative fundamentalist South is an even bigger mystery. Pick the gayest, most faggoty fag you can find on [[Wikipedia:The Castro, San Francisco, California|Castro Street]] and put him in Southern Virginia. He'd be a dead man walking. But we all know how good Chris is at [[Fail|critical thinking]]. He ''was'' on the [[honor roll]].

While yes, intuition is an underappreciated sense that can tell us many things about another person, like whether they are safe or not, autistics aren't as naturally intuitive as normal kids. Chris obviously has no sense of intuition or inkling of body language. So him getting "bad vibes" was just hindsight bias (and probably some help from Bob and Barb manipulating his memory) as he tries to justify himself.

For argument's sake, let's say that there were homos on the school board. What would they have against the Chandlers? Sure, they're Baptists and against homosexuality, but so is everyone else in the area. Why would they single him out of all the other homophobic families? If anything, they'd assume that Chris was too young and stupid to understand complex matters like sexuality and same-sex relationships, and figure that they could enlighten him. They'd want to ''help'' him, not expel him for his parents' ignorance. Otherwise, that would look ''really'' bad on their part and cause an uproar from the Christian community (read: everyone within a 20 mile radius). The only thing that public school boards can expel kids for expressing (and teachers, for that matter) is outright racism.

His later statements also contradict why he "doesn't like to associate with men". On [[Mumble]], when confronted about how only gays have all female friends (harem animes don't count, they're ''fiction''), he paused, clearly backed into a wall, and whined that he never got the chance to make friends with other guys, despite having ''plenty'' of chances throughout his schooling. This is another instance of him trying to justify himself.

==[[Wikipedia:Captain Underpants|Captain Underpants]]==

Years after Chris left Nathanael Greene, Dr. Johnson finally vindicated Chris's claims by showing the entire world what a sick perv he is:

<blockquote>“Principal Bruce Johnson revealed his shockingly silly alter ego to the students of Stanardsville, Virginia's Nathanael Greene Elementary after they improved their [[Wikipedia:Standardized test|standardized test scores]]. Johnson appeared on the school's roof as Captain Underpants, hero of the popular children's book series. The outfit included a red cape, white undershirt, and large white underpants worn over his clothes. "We'll have to do this every year to get the scores up," Superintendent Ray Dingledine [seriously?] told the ''Daily Progress''. Added Johnson, "They'll laugh at me out here, but when it comes to being in the office, there's no arguing.”<ref>http://books.google.com/books?id=vnLetsZ4l4kC&pg=PA82</ref></blockquote>

Sounds like the best principal ever, to me. Eh sounds like a pretty cool guy.

==See Also==
[[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]]

==References==
<references/>

{{People}}
[[Category: People]]

Talk:List of videos

2010-01-04T20:35:16Z

Pugs Malone:

== sortable table? ==

perhaps we should make this into a sortable table format, so that users can sort by saga, et cetera. i like the current formatting, though, as it's probably a bit easier to read than a table, so maybe the table should go on a new page called [[Table of Captain's Logs]] or something --[[User:Cogsdev|cogsdev/vedsgoc]] 07:51, 13 October 2009 (CEST)
*until we can find a good way to sort the icons, we can't really do it as a table. i'll look into this --[[User:Cogsdev|cogsdev/vedsgoc]] 08:18, 13 October 2009 (CEST)
**Undid the table until we can find a way to make it sortable. --[[User:Ed.kelly.sonichu|Ed Kelly]] 08:21, 13 October 2009 (CEST)
***i'm a fukkin genius give me props yo [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 08:38, 13 October 2009 (CEST)
****What happens when the video has more than one subject/style/saga icon? --[[User:Ed.kelly.sonichu|Ed Kelly]]
****Actually, I prefer the list style because it's easier to read, but since I'm a newfag I'll let you guys decide what's best.--[[User:Ed.kelly.sonichu|Ed Kelly]] 08:55, 13 October 2009 (CEST)
****Also, yyyy/mm/dd dates suck.--[[User:Ed.kelly.sonichu|Ed Kelly]] 09:16, 13 October 2009 (CEST)
*****clyde came up with a way of making it sort the icons, and we're trying to make it a bit more readable. personally i think we should have two separate pages, [[List of Captain's Logs]]/[[List of videos]] for how it was before and [[Table of Captain's Logs]]/[[Table of videos]] for the new sortable table, because the list is easier to read but harder to browse or search.
*icons are now sortable. they're templates, so transclude them into the table with <nowiki>{{name}}</nowiki>. they work by including a hidden string that the table's sorting script can read(it ignores images). there's a list of available icon templates [[:Category:Icon_Templates|here]]. regards table layout, we're thinking of using something [http://meta.wikimedia.org/wiki/Help:Sorting#Colspan_workaround like this] so that the description is on a new line but moves with the information directly above it. thoughts?
**Yeah, I like that.--[[User:Ed.kelly.sonichu|Ed Kelly]] 10:52, 13 October 2009 (CEST)
*i moved the table to [[Table of Videos]], and moved the key into a template(which you can easily edit using the little edit link i added to it while we work on it). there's not much point adding stuff to the table until the list is finished, though, so please continue the fantastic work that's been done on this article --[[User:Cogsdev|cogsdev/vedsgoc]] 11:27, 13 October 2009 (CEST)
**Thanks, Cogsdev. --[[User:Ed.kelly.sonichu|Ed Kelly]] 13:36, 13 October 2009 (CEST)

BITCHES, I FINALLY GOT THIS SHIT WORKING [[User:Clydec/sandbox]] [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 21:51, 13 October 2009 (CEST)

== new icon types? ==

perhaps we should add new icons for information such as how the video was released(leaked or youtube), which shirt he was wearing(using [[Chris and fashion]] as reference), time of day, etc. --[[User:Cogsdev|cogsdev/vedsgoc]] 04:57, 16 October 2009 (CEST)
*I'd be careful about over-complicating it. The icons were originally just supposed to be a guide so you could quickly identify a video that you were looking for, and people are probably more likely to remember subject, style and saga than what he was wearing or the time of day. --[[User:Ed.kelly.sonichu|Ed Kelly]] 14:28, 16 October 2009 (CEST)
**Although perhaps a [[List of Videos by Shirt]] page would be useful if people are willing to maintain it? --[[User:Ed.kelly.sonichu|Ed Kelly]] 14:31, 16 October 2009 (CEST)
::*As seemingly useless as the shirt icons are, they're absolutely hilarious. [[Image:Awesome_micro.png|Awesome]] work. --[[User:Whoreos n' Milf|Whoreos n' Milf]] 16:59, 27 October 2009 (CET)
*subject, style and saga are enough for finding a particular video you're looking for, but having more information makes it easier to find other videos you might not have been looking for, particularly with the sortable table. while time of day is a bit silly(especially since it's quite hard to tell), format(leaked/youtube) is quite useful, and shirt is probably not very useful but still quite interesting, i think

==The Great Merging==
Okay, so we have three pages that try to list every video Chris has made:
*[[List of videos produced by Christian Weston Chandler]]
*[[List of Videos]]
*[[Table of Videos]]

The first one is accurately dated, has good descriptions, and is updated up until [[August 2009]]. It's also a descriptive title. But it's in a very boring table and out of date.

The second has icons which are really nice, it categorizes videos, but a vague title (it should be at least "List of videos" for one). It really should have a more specific title, maybe give it "List of videos produced by Christian Weston Chandler" though that would exclude videos like the one where he goes to the bar which was actually made by a gal pal.

The third has the video in sortable table format, which is extremely useful, though the dating needs work (then again, Cogs is still working on it), but the title sucks (no offense to cogs) - it's still a list, just in table format.

Ideally, I see the first and second combined into the third and then we'll have a kickass list of all of Chris's videos. But we still need a good, descriptive title (or at least I think so - if you beg to differ, say so and perhaps you'll convince me otherwise).

Any thoughts? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 14:20, 19 October 2009 (CEST)

* i think a list of all videos chris related would be great, not just stuff he uploaded. i doubt anyone would search by that criteria anyway. we're just going for the shit that's hilarious. an icon to indicate leaked or live (chris drinking/city hall) might suffice. and the title is the least important shit. getting the shit into a decent format is more important. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 02:17, 20 October 2009 (CEST)
:*True, though I wasn't very clear, top priority is to get everything into a clean, presentable format so we have a kickass article that is useful, informative, and pleasurable to read. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:03, 20 October 2009 (CEST)

==New shirt icons==
Hey, guys, how about a new shape for shirt icons? ''(deleted. see article page for pics)'' If you like, I can make the rest of'em. My main goal was to visually distinguish the shirt icons from the round subject matter icons. --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 12:20, 24 November 2009 (CET)
*I don't see why not. --[[User:Whoreos n' Milf|Whoreos n' Milf]] 20:20, 24 November 2009 (CET)
:* Thanks! I'll upload them tomorrow, I think.
::By the way. What does the "website" icon depict? I seriously can't get it.
::Oh, and also. I think we need to somehow distinguish "video games" (subject matter) and "video game" (other). --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 20:24, 24 November 2009 (CET)

Okay, uploaded the '''new shirt icons''' (see article). Tell me what you think. On another note, how about these new icons: [[Image:Homosn.png]] [[Image:Fanartn.PNG]] [[Image:Sexn.png]], instead of the old ones: [[Image:Homos.png]] [[Image:Fanart.png]] [[Image:Sex.png]]? Also, my questions about the "website" icon and the "video game"/"video games" icons still stand. Okay, off to another article --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 21:52, 25 November 2009 (CET)

==Videobooks==

I noticed that none of the Videobooks are listed here. Is this intentional, and should we include them? I know that they're mostly dross, but there are still a few hilarious moments. [[User:Pugs Malone|Pugs Malone]] 20:35, 4 January 2010 (UTC)