CWCki - User contributions [en]

12 October 2009

2011-03-06T01:38:48Z

Pyram1dhead:

{{quote|RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAGH!}}

"'''12 October 2009'''" (officially "'''10122009'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] shows [[Gregg Mays]]<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xGMJX84qoo The Gregg Mays YouTube video that prompted the rage]</ref> his [[autism|power]]. A more apt description is that he throws a temper tantrum in what is quite possibly his greatest display of [[Chris and Anger|Tard Rage]]. Because of this, the video is also referred to as "Chris Loses It".

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}
{{Infobox/video
| name = 10122009
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ILq5DVl7g6o}}
| stardate = 12 [[October 2009]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}} {{Rage|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}
| shirt = {{DarkRedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Challenge for Clyde]]
| next = [[Challenge for Clyde II]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

0:01 to 0:05-
Chris starts the video by screaming randomly, jumping up and down.

0:05 to 0:11-
Chris screeches like a cat, before rolling over like a retard, making a whooping noise like The Three Stooges, and crashing to the ground with a thud. Meanwhile, we get a nice view of his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|underwear and asscrack]].

0:11: to 0:16-
Chris gets up.

0:16 to 0:29-
Chris rages randomly again, this time failing to break a cardboard box over his head. Afterwards he tries to kick a piece of what appears to be cardboard covered in blue cloth. He bends it after the third attempt.

0:29 to 0:34-
Chris steps on his couch and then growls at the [[camera]].

0:34 to 0:45-
Chris manages to actually tear the cardboard box in half and flings it at the ground. He picks up one of the pieces again and sissy throws it at the camera, missing entirely.

0:45 to 0:53-
Chris quiets down for a bit to [[Chris and Health|catch his breath after less than a minute of very light exercise]], quietly raging at the camera.

0:53 to 1:02-
Chris swivels his chair, moves some stuff out of the way, stands on the chair, and falls over while growling.

1:02 to 1:13-
Chris flails about randomly, pulling up his pants every few moments.

1:14 to 1:22-
Chris picks up a phone (that didn't ring) and answers, "Hello? Yes, hello? Is this uh [[Wes Iseli|Walter Grisby]]? [[Random-access humor|Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what?"]] '''RRRAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!'''

1:22 to 1:27-
Chris throws the phone at the camera. It falls over. Chris moves it to turn it off.

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Dance Chris-Chan Dance
| video = {{#ev:youtube|bSisIiepVCQ}}
| stardate = 13 [[October 2009]]
| maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/drfaust8 unosan]
| subject =
| type = Party Hard Rave
| info = }}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Autistic Rave
| video = {{#ev:youtube|RQOiEV9bzJ4}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2009]]
| maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/CarltonBBanks CarltonBBanks]
| subject =
| type = [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (band)|Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] club edition
| info = }}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan Michael Bay Edition
| video = {{#ev:youtube|47dAcI_Dnqo}}
| stardate = 16 [[March 2010]]
| maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/MaciekOst MaciekOst]
| subject =
| type = Explosions
| info = }}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris Gets a Call from Walter Grisby
| video = {{#ev:youtube|SK2IP21R50Q}}
| stardate = 08 [[November 2009]]
| maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/manwithoutabody manwithoutabody]
| subject =
| type =
| info = This is how Chris treats [[white knight]]s.
}}

==References==
<references />

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Challenge for Clyde]]|nextlink=[[Challenge for Clyde II]]|}}
{{Troll Videos}}
{{Clyde Saga}}

[[Category:Videos with RAGE]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, October 2009| 2009-10-12]]
[[Category:Clyde Cash Saga videos| 2009-10-12]]

Cwcsicle

2011-03-03T21:22:38Z

Pyram1dhead:

'''Cwcsicle''' is a name of a video log entailing [[Chris]] sticking his [[duck|penis]] in the snow for fifteen minutes. It was made in an attempt to get a scene in Jackass 3D. It is split into five parts: 100_2123 through 7.MOV. These titles seem to suggest that it was made in [[February 2010]]. It is the most recently released work to feature the [[Medallion of Fail|Sonichu Medallion.]]

==Video==
<center>{{Infobox/video
| name = Cwcsicle
| image = {{#ev:youtube|ckU3J1BkeWs}}
| Stardate = c. [[February 2010]]
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = {{Crazy|text}}
| Shirt = [[Image:Safetyparka.png]] Safety Parka
| previous = —
| next = —
| other = {{leaked|text}}
}}
</center>

==Transcriptions==
===100_2123.MOV (0:25)===
''[Christian stands in his snow-covered backyard. He is dressed quite heavily, pointing the camera at himself [[Chris and cinematography|with a rather shaky hand]].]''
Hi, I'm Christian Chandler, uh, this is ''"[[Random-access humor|Frozen Stalactite.]]" [Attempts to tilt camera towards crotch, missing it entirely.]'' I'm gonna put my dick in the snow ''[Aims it back at his face.]'' and I'm gonna leave it in there for about fifteen minutes. Currently it's 12:38 ''[Holds up his phone with his free hand]'' according to my cell phone clock. If there's one clock you can not change, it's the one on your cell phone. ''[Pans camera down, revealing that he's buried himself waist-deep. Pans back up.]'' Okay, see ya'll in fifteen minutes.

===100_2124.MOV (0:07)===
''[Holds up phone.]'' About six minutes in now. Boy, it's cold. I've had p-''[Video abruptly ends.]''

===100_2125.MOV (0:10)===
''[Carrying on from where the former left off, albeit with a little more urgency.]'' About six minutes in now. I've had previous experiences with, uh, freezing my dick, and I've even stretched it a bit. Right. I'll be checking back in se-in seven.

===100_2126.MOV (0:22)===
A-alrighty, it's 12:53 ''[Nearly beans himself in the face with his camera lens.]'' Let's pull me out. ''[Gets up with a grunt, nearly loses balance. Camera goes out of focus, altough Chris can be heard shivering. The camera turns to focus on his crotch, with his [[duck]] thankfully quite out of view. The sound of something scraping the mic can be heard as he examines his genitals.]'' Feels blue. ''[Camera goes out of focus, then turns to his penis. Not only is it quite within view, it has turned bright red and the camera is upside down. Shortly after, the camera turns away.]'' Look at all that snow all over me. There's snow all over my pants. ''[Camera finally turns to Chris' face.]'' Heh. Kids, that is definitely something- ''[Video abruptly ends.]''

===100_2127.MOV (0:06)===
Everybody, I dare say that is one stunt you should not try at home. Peace out. ''[camera turns away as he sets it down.]''

==External links==
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itfzlADNFb8&feature=youtube_gdata SFW version]

[http://www.mediafire.com/?ys74ur2xcw24s5t Download]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, February 2010]]
[[Category:Leaked videos]]

Cwcsicle

2011-03-03T21:21:57Z

Pyram1dhead:

Cwcsicle

2011-03-03T21:20:15Z

Pyram1dhead:

'''Cwcsicle''' is a name of a video log entailing [[Chris]] sticking his [[duck|penis]] in the snow for fifteen minutes. It was made in an attempt to get a scene in Jackass 3D. It is split into five parts: 100_2123 through 7.MOV. These titles seem to suggest that it was made in [[February 2010]]. It is the most recently released work to feature the [[Medallion of Fail|Sonichu Medallion.]]

==Video==
<center>{{Infobox/video
| name = Cwcsicle
| image = {{#ev:youtube|ckU3J1BkeWs}}
| Stardate = c. [[February 2010]]
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = {{Crazy|text}}
| Shirt = [[Image:Safetyparka.png]] Safety Parka
| previous = —
| next = —
}}
</center>

==Transcriptions==
===100_2123.MOV (0:25)===
''[Christian stands in his snow-covered backyard. He is dressed quite heavily, pointing the camera at himself [[Chris and cinematography|with a rather shaky hand]].]''
Hi, I'm Christian Chandler, uh, this is ''"[[Random-access humor|Frozen Stalactite.]]" [Attempts to tilt camera towards crotch, missing it entirely.]'' I'm gonna put my dick in the snow ''[Aims it back at his face.]'' and I'm gonna leave it in there for about fifteen minutes. Currently it's 12:38 ''[Holds up his phone with his free hand]'' according to my cell phone clock. If there's one clock you can not change, it's the one on your cell phone. ''[Pans camera down, revealing that he's buried himself waist-deep. Pans back up.]'' Okay, see ya'll in fifteen minutes.

===100_2124.MOV (0:07)===
''[Holds up phone.]'' About six minutes in now. Boy, it's cold. I've had p-''[Video abruptly ends.]''

===100_2125.MOV (0:10)===
''[Carrying on from where the former left off, albeit with a little more urgency.]'' About six minutes in now. I've had previous experiences with, uh, freezing my dick, and I've even stretched it a bit. Right. I'll be checking back in se-in seven.

===100_2126.MOV (0:22)===
A-alrighty, it's 12:53 ''[Nearly beans himself in the face with his camera lens.]'' Let's pull me out. ''[Gets up with a grunt, nearly loses balance. Camera goes out of focus, altough Chris can be heard shivering. The camera turns to focus on his crotch, with his [[duck]] thankfully quite out of view. The sound of something scraping the mic can be heard as he examines his genitals.]'' Feels blue. ''[Camera goes out of focus, then turns to his penis. Not only is it quite within view, it has turned bright red and the camera is upside down. Shortly after, the camera turns away.]'' Look at all that snow all over me. There's snow all over my pants. ''[Camera finally turns to Chris' face.]'' Heh. Kids, that is definitely something- ''[Video abruptly ends.]''

===100_2127.MOV (0:06)===
Everybody, I dare say that is one stunt you should not try at home. Peace out. ''[camera turns away as he sets it down.]''

==External links==
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itfzlADNFb8&feature=youtube_gdata SFW version]

[http://www.mediafire.com/?ys74ur2xcw24s5t Download]

Template:ListOfVideos/Jan-Jun2010

2011-03-03T21:17:15Z

Pyram1dhead:

==January 2010==

* '''[[This was my fault]]''' ''2 [[January 2010]]'' (1:22) {{Website}} {{reason}} {{DangerStripeShirt}} Chris asks [[Chris and remorse|for forgiveness]] from the Coca-Cola company and the [[CWCipedia#CWCipedia Closed Due To AIDS|CWCipedia's]] [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|Sysop]] for his infringement of [[Chris and copyright|copyright laws]].

* '''[[Down with Asperchu]]''' ''9 [[January 2010]]'' (2:55) {{Fanart}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{CaptainFalconShirt}} Since Christian believes he is victorious over the [[homos|gays]] after getting the despised [[CWCipedia#CWCipedia_Advertisements|ads]] taken off of his CWCipedia, he imposes his wrath upon Alec Benson Leary, the creator of [[Asperchu]].

* '''[[12 January 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2010]]''' ''12 [[January 2010]]'' (1:11) {{Violence}} {{Fanart}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{DogShirt}} Chris, [[Chris and reality|delusional as always]], mentions talks of a work with now-defunct anime distribution company [[Wikipedia:A.D. Vision|A.D.Vision]] (now known as Section 23) and gives a shout out to a mysterious girl named Ginger before going into a [[Chris and anger|tard rage]] over the [[Asperchu]] ads on his site.

* '''[[14 January 2010|Captain's Log, Startdate January 14th, 2010]]''' ''14 [[January 2010]]'' (2:11) {{Fanart}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{DogShirt}} In this video, Chris tries to convince the audience that he is [[Lie|a good person]] even after he [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursed]] [[Asperchu|someone]] and wished for their [[Death threats|imminent demise]].

* '''[[What's_the_Name,_Christian_Chandler,_C_H_R_I_S_C_H_A_N|What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N]]''' ''14 [[January 2010]]'' (1:13) {{Music}} {{DogShirt}} Chris sings once again, performing his own variation of a "Mr. Plow Remix" that featured in a recent [[The Simpsons]] 20th Anniversary special, about how he is Christian Chandler. He proves that he cannot play the harmonica at all, making his [[Mailbag 21#Chris has something in common with Billy Joel|statement]] in the [[Mailbag]] yet another [[lie]].

* '''[[15 January 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2010]]''' ''15 [[January 2010]]'' (:28) {{Fanart}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{DogShirt}} Chris expresses his desire to [[Homos#Evidence_that_Chris_is_a_homo|take on four dudes at once]] and then proceeds to drop his dox, again.

* '''[[U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L|Love Sonichu and Hate Asperchu (1337 version)]]''' ''15 [[January 2010]]'' (:51) {{Fanart}} {{Crazy}} {{Asperchu}} {{DogShirt}} The video title, '''U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L''', written in some kind of reversed [[Wikipedia:leet|1337]] pseudo-Spanish, is translated as "Love Sonichu and hate Asperchu". Chris tries to be clever by speaking Spanish backwards, but he just ends up sounding like a raving lunatic. He has also been wearing the same shirt for about 4 days now. Take from that what you will.

*'''[[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke]]''' ''17 [[January 2010]]'' (9:30) {{Fanart}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{VertBlueGrayShirt}} Chris runs down what he considers to be mockeries of himself in Asperchu, calls for [[Patti]]'s spirit to eat Alec's soul for dinner, and threatens to get his church congregation and the FBI to take down the [[Asperpedia]].

*'''[[22 January 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate January 22nd, 2010]]''' ''22 [[January 2010]]'' (1:45) {{Homos}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{VertBlueGrayShirt}} Chris denies the homosexual implications of giving Asperchu a makeover by including home remodeling, cooking, and "myth busting" under the heading of "makeovers."

*'''[[29 January 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate January 25th or 26th, 2010]]''' ''30 [[January 2010]]'' (2:28) {{Website}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{VertRedGreenShirt}} Chris apologizes to Alec and asks him to reduce the size of the Asperchu ads on the CWCipedia. He also dictates what letters the fans of Sonichu should send him if they want answers in the Mailbag.

==February 2010==

*'''[[CWC address to Royal Board]]''' ''1 [[February 2010]]'' (4:23) {{Comics}} {{Racism}} {{Reason}} {{RedStripeShirt}} Chris, having been told that Sonichu violates a UK [[Chris and copyright|copyright]], attempts to make his case to the Royal Board of Certification. For some reason, he seems hesitant to mention that Sonichu is based off of Sonic the Hedgehog, as though he's dimly aware that he's plagiarizing like crazy.

*'''[[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.]]''' ''1 [[February 2010]]'' (1:03) {{Homos}} {{Website}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{RedStripeShirt}} Chris casts another Curse-ye-ha-me-ha, this time at Asperpedia's Mao, over the new homoerotic ads on CWCipedia.

*'''[[Apologies to Alec and Evan]]''' ''1 [[February 2010]]'' (2:15) {{Website}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{RedStripeShirt}} After cursing Mao, Chris excuse himself to Alec and Evan for the "[[Death threats|Past Unformalities]]" and ask if he can tone down his publicity on CWCipedia.

*'''[[5 February 2010|I Am Alive]]''' ''5 [[February 2010]]'' (2:30) {{Website}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{VertBlueGrayShirt}} Chris reacts to the rumors of his premature death, claims that he will kill off [[Simonla Rosechu|Simonla]], and says that he is sorry for spreading rumors regarding Alec.

*'''[[9 February 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate February 9th, 2010]]''' ''9 [[February 2010]]'' (3:17) {{Website}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{StraightWhiteLinesShirt}} Chris makes a video about how Mao, Alec, Evan and Sean have destroyed the [[CWCipedia|undestroyable]].

*'''[[Cwcsicle]]''' ''[[February 2010]] (?)'' (1:17) {{Crazy}} {{SafetyParka}} Chris films himself holding his [[duck]] in the snow for fifteen minutes in a bid to get himself featured in the upcoming ''Jackass 3D''.

*'''[[Christian Love Day (video)|Christian Love Day]]''' ''23 [[February 2010]]'' (1:12) {{Crazy}} {{RedBlueShirt}} Chris proclaims that the trolls may take his dignity, but they'll never take HIS FREEDO- I mean, Christian Love Day!

*'''[[Magical Man Potion]]''' ''24 [[February 2010]]'' (2:11) {{Crazy}} {{OrangeShirt}} Chris mixes up yet another [[fapcup|disgusting concoction]], but this time it turns him into someone less pathetic.

*'''[[PS3 Tutorial for my fans]]''' ''24 [[February 2010]]'' (9:57) {{Video games}} {{Crazy}} Chris attempts to explain the PS3 and PlayStation Network.

==March 2010==

*'''[[03022010|Captain's Log, Stardate March 2nd, 2009]]''' ''02 [[March 2010]]'' (2:33) {{Comics}} {{Website}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{TanWideLines}} Chris apologizes to Alec, and shows off a new Asperchu medallion.

*'''[[Surfshack Tito (video)|Surfshack Tito]]''' ''02 [[March 2010]]'' (:14) {{Crazy}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{TanWideLines}} Chris talks about Rocket Power.

*'''[[A message to the Trolls]]''' ''10 [[March 2010]]'' (1:50) {{Violence}} {{Tragedy}} {{Rage}} {{JokerShirt}} Chris laments the ill effects the trolls have had on his life, and pontificates the feelings of a broken heart. This marks the end of his relationship with [[The Wallflower]].

*'''[[Don't Mess With Me]]''' ''10 [[March 2010]]'' (1:43) {{Violence}} {{Crazy}} {{Rage}} {{Clyde}} {{JokerShirt}} Chris imagines going Abu Musab al-Zarqawi on [[Clyde Cash]].

*'''[[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!]]''' ''14 [[March 2010]]'' (1:03) {{Violence}} {{Crazy}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{TanWideLines}} A kilt-wearing Chris threatens [[Surfshack Tito]] with a panty shot and his amazing knife skills.

*'''[["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!]]''' ''14 [[March 2010]]'' (2:08) {{Galpals}} {{Sex}} {{Tragedy}} {{Crazy}} {{DangerStripeShirt}} Chris begs the Wallflower to be his [[sweetheart]] so he won't have to pay $100 for a prostitute.

*'''[[Happy Sonichu Day]]''' ''17 [[March 2010]]'' (1:23) {{Comics}} {{Reason}} {{TanWideLines}} Chris congratulates himself for ten years of Sonichu, and tells his fans to stop pestering him about updates.

*'''[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]''' ''17 [[March 2010]]'' (:56) {{Racism}} {{Violence}} {{Rage}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{TanWideLines}} Chris drops an [[Niggos|N-Bomb]] on Surfshack Tito.

*'''[[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|C-Ya Later]]''' ''21 [[March 2010]]'' (6:05) {{Website}} {{Comics}} {{Reason}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{VertRedGreenShirt}} After witnessing the carnage on CWCipedia, Chris vows to stay off the internet. For real this time. Honest.

*'''[[Cleveland Show Voice Rant]]''' ''22 [[March 2010]]'' (1:06) {{Television}} {{reason}} {{VertRedGreenShirt}} Chris discusses the quality of the voice acting on [[Family Guy|The Cleveland Show]], 36 hours after vowing to leave the internet forever.

*'''[[F Abstinance]]''' ''28 [[March 2010]]'' (1:32) {{Sex}} {{Rage}} {{CaptainFalconShirt}} Chris condemns abstinence-based sex education, but for [[Virgin with rage|all the wrong reasons]].

==April 2010==

*'''[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]''' ''12 [[April 2010]]'' (4:28) {{Racism}} {{Reason}} {{Rage}} {{Audio}} {{Game Place}} Chris returns to the [[Game Place]] and calls the [[Michael Snyder|manager]] "Jew" when he refuses to admit him back. Audio only.

*'''[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]''' ''22 [[April 2010]]'' (5:03) {{Sex}} {{Crazy}} {{Jackie}} {{MountAndDoMe}} {{Cwcbra2}} {{Leaked}} Chris sets the record straight for his new [[Jackie e-mails|gal-pal]], performs [[Chris and sex|oral sex]] on the camera, and talks about his [[Muscle bra|bra]].

*'''[[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]''' ''23 [[April 2010]]'' (8:49) {{Autism}} {{Reason}} {{Cwcbra}} Chris talks about [[Autism]] while wearing a [[Muscle bra|bra]]. He also chastises men who are topless because nipples should stay a mystery.

==May 2010==

*'''[[I Pimp My Ride.MOV|I Pimp My Ride]]''' ''5 [[May 2010]]'' (:34) {{Video games}} {{Smug}} {{PokemonLeague}} Chris brags about ruining his PS3.

*'''[[100 2178]]''' ''8 [[May 2010]]'' (7:07) {{Tragedy}} {{Crazy}} {{OrangeSleeveless}} Chris sits in the dark and blames the Greene County school system for his having no friends.

*'''[[05142010]]''' ''15 [[May 2010]]'' (4:44) {{Autism}} {{Tragedy}} {{PityShirt}} Chris talks about a girl murdered by her boyfriend and how he's unable to socialize due to the trolls.

*'''[[Some Favored Comedians]]''' ''20 [[May 2010]]'' (9:53) {{Rumours}} {{Television}} {{Reason}} {{Comedy}} {{WhiteTShirt}} {{DenimJacket}} Chris mentions his family before analyzing voice acting in his favorite TV shows, and talking about his favorite comedians.

*'''[[100 2188]]''' ''27 [[May 2010]]'' (4:41) {{Website}} {{Homos}} {{Rage}} {{BlueTShirt}} {{DenimJacket}} Chris projects about trolls being autistic and obsessed with computers. He is also STRAIGHT.

*'''[[100 2189]]''' ''31 [[May 2010]]'' (1:56) {{Website}} {{Rumours}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} Chris makes clear that he still retains the rights to Sonichu despite the CWCipedia being under new ownership. He also encourages the trolls to work harder in order to bring him back to the internet.

==June 2010==

*'''[[6 June 2010]]''' (9:09) {{Rumours}} {{Reason}} {{RedBlackTrim}} {{Game Place}} Chris tries to explain why he was stalking [[Michael Snyder]] with a camera, and subsequent attempts at vehicular manslaughter. He then blames the internet for all his problems, again.<noinclude>LIST OF VIDEOS
{{usage|1=This template is used to generate a segment of the content on the [[List of Videos]] page. This way, the article itself is much easier to manage. The format for using this template is as follows: 

'''<pre>{{ListOfVideos/Jan-Jun2010}}</pre>'''

- Displays:{{ListOfVideos/Jan-Jun2010}}
}}

[[Category:Article content templates|{{PAGENAME}}]]</noinclude>

Template:ListOfVideos/Jan-Jun2010

2011-03-03T21:15:48Z

Pyram1dhead:

==January 2010==

* '''[[This was my fault]]''' ''2 [[January 2010]]'' (1:22) {{Website}} {{reason}} {{DangerStripeShirt}} Chris asks [[Chris and remorse|for forgiveness]] from the Coca-Cola company and the [[CWCipedia#CWCipedia Closed Due To AIDS|CWCipedia's]] [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|Sysop]] for his infringement of [[Chris and copyright|copyright laws]].

* '''[[Down with Asperchu]]''' ''9 [[January 2010]]'' (2:55) {{Fanart}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{CaptainFalconShirt}} Since Christian believes he is victorious over the [[homos|gays]] after getting the despised [[CWCipedia#CWCipedia_Advertisements|ads]] taken off of his CWCipedia, he imposes his wrath upon Alec Benson Leary, the creator of [[Asperchu]].

* '''[[12 January 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2010]]''' ''12 [[January 2010]]'' (1:11) {{Violence}} {{Fanart}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{DogShirt}} Chris, [[Chris and reality|delusional as always]], mentions talks of a work with now-defunct anime distribution company [[Wikipedia:A.D. Vision|A.D.Vision]] (now known as Section 23) and gives a shout out to a mysterious girl named Ginger before going into a [[Chris and anger|tard rage]] over the [[Asperchu]] ads on his site.

* '''[[14 January 2010|Captain's Log, Startdate January 14th, 2010]]''' ''14 [[January 2010]]'' (2:11) {{Fanart}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{DogShirt}} In this video, Chris tries to convince the audience that he is [[Lie|a good person]] even after he [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursed]] [[Asperchu|someone]] and wished for their [[Death threats|imminent demise]].

* '''[[What's_the_Name,_Christian_Chandler,_C_H_R_I_S_C_H_A_N|What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N]]''' ''14 [[January 2010]]'' (1:13) {{Music}} {{DogShirt}} Chris sings once again, performing his own variation of a "Mr. Plow Remix" that featured in a recent [[The Simpsons]] 20th Anniversary special, about how he is Christian Chandler. He proves that he cannot play the harmonica at all, making his [[Mailbag 21#Chris has something in common with Billy Joel|statement]] in the [[Mailbag]] yet another [[lie]].

* '''[[15 January 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2010]]''' ''15 [[January 2010]]'' (:28) {{Fanart}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{DogShirt}} Chris expresses his desire to [[Homos#Evidence_that_Chris_is_a_homo|take on four dudes at once]] and then proceeds to drop his dox, again.

* '''[[U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L|Love Sonichu and Hate Asperchu (1337 version)]]''' ''15 [[January 2010]]'' (:51) {{Fanart}} {{Crazy}} {{Asperchu}} {{DogShirt}} The video title, '''U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L''', written in some kind of reversed [[Wikipedia:leet|1337]] pseudo-Spanish, is translated as "Love Sonichu and hate Asperchu". Chris tries to be clever by speaking Spanish backwards, but he just ends up sounding like a raving lunatic. He has also been wearing the same shirt for about 4 days now. Take from that what you will.

*'''[[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke]]''' ''17 [[January 2010]]'' (9:30) {{Fanart}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{VertBlueGrayShirt}} Chris runs down what he considers to be mockeries of himself in Asperchu, calls for [[Patti]]'s spirit to eat Alec's soul for dinner, and threatens to get his church congregation and the FBI to take down the [[Asperpedia]].

*'''[[22 January 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate January 22nd, 2010]]''' ''22 [[January 2010]]'' (1:45) {{Homos}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{VertBlueGrayShirt}} Chris denies the homosexual implications of giving Asperchu a makeover by including home remodeling, cooking, and "myth busting" under the heading of "makeovers."

*'''[[29 January 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate January 25th or 26th, 2010]]''' ''30 [[January 2010]]'' (2:28) {{Website}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{VertRedGreenShirt}} Chris apologizes to Alec and asks him to reduce the size of the Asperchu ads on the CWCipedia. He also dictates what letters the fans of Sonichu should send him if they want answers in the Mailbag.

==February 2010==

*'''[[CWC address to Royal Board]]''' ''1 [[February 2010]]'' (4:23) {{Comics}} {{Racism}} {{Reason}} {{RedStripeShirt}} Chris, having been told that Sonichu violates a UK [[Chris and copyright|copyright]], attempts to make his case to the Royal Board of Certification. For some reason, he seems hesitant to mention that Sonichu is based off of Sonic the Hedgehog, as though he's dimly aware that he's plagiarizing like crazy.

*'''[[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.]]''' ''1 [[February 2010]]'' (1:03) {{Homos}} {{Website}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{RedStripeShirt}} Chris casts another Curse-ye-ha-me-ha, this time at Asperpedia's Mao, over the new homoerotic ads on CWCipedia.

*'''[[Apologies to Alec and Evan]]''' ''1 [[February 2010]]'' (2:15) {{Website}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{RedStripeShirt}} After cursing Mao, Chris excuse himself to Alec and Evan for the "[[Death threats|Past Unformalities]]" and ask if he can tone down his publicity on CWCipedia.

*'''[[5 February 2010|I Am Alive]]''' ''5 [[February 2010]]'' (2:30) {{Website}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{VertBlueGrayShirt}} Chris reacts to the rumors of his premature death, claims that he will kill off [[Simonla Rosechu|Simonla]], and says that he is sorry for spreading rumors regarding Alec.

*'''[[9 February 2010|Captain's Log, Stardate February 9th, 2010]]''' ''9 [[February 2010]]'' (3:17) {{Website}} {{Rage}} {{Asperchu}} {{StraightWhiteLinesShirt}} Chris makes a video about how Mao, Alec, Evan and Sean have destroyed the [[CWCipedia|undestroyable]].

*'''[[Cwcsicle]]''' ''[[February 2010]] (?)'' (1:17) {{Crazy}} {{SafetyParka}} Chris films himself holding his dick in the snow for fifteen minutes in a bid to get into the newly announced Jackass 3D.

*'''[[Christian Love Day (video)|Christian Love Day]]''' ''23 [[February 2010]]'' (1:12) {{Crazy}} {{RedBlueShirt}} Chris proclaims that the trolls may take his dignity, but they'll never take HIS FREEDO- I mean, Christian Love Day!

*'''[[Magical Man Potion]]''' ''24 [[February 2010]]'' (2:11) {{Crazy}} {{OrangeShirt}} Chris mixes up yet another [[fapcup|disgusting concoction]], but this time it turns him into someone less pathetic.

*'''[[PS3 Tutorial for my fans]]''' ''24 [[February 2010]]'' (9:57) {{Video games}} {{Crazy}} Chris attempts to explain the PS3 and PlayStation Network.

==March 2010==

*'''[[03022010|Captain's Log, Stardate March 2nd, 2009]]''' ''02 [[March 2010]]'' (2:33) {{Comics}} {{Website}} {{Reason}} {{Asperchu}} {{TanWideLines}} Chris apologizes to Alec, and shows off a new Asperchu medallion.

*'''[[Surfshack Tito (video)|Surfshack Tito]]''' ''02 [[March 2010]]'' (:14) {{Crazy}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{TanWideLines}} Chris talks about Rocket Power.

*'''[[A message to the Trolls]]''' ''10 [[March 2010]]'' (1:50) {{Violence}} {{Tragedy}} {{Rage}} {{JokerShirt}} Chris laments the ill effects the trolls have had on his life, and pontificates the feelings of a broken heart. This marks the end of his relationship with [[The Wallflower]].

*'''[[Don't Mess With Me]]''' ''10 [[March 2010]]'' (1:43) {{Violence}} {{Crazy}} {{Rage}} {{Clyde}} {{JokerShirt}} Chris imagines going Abu Musab al-Zarqawi on [[Clyde Cash]].

*'''[[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!]]''' ''14 [[March 2010]]'' (1:03) {{Violence}} {{Crazy}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{TanWideLines}} A kilt-wearing Chris threatens [[Surfshack Tito]] with a panty shot and his amazing knife skills.

*'''[["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!]]''' ''14 [[March 2010]]'' (2:08) {{Galpals}} {{Sex}} {{Tragedy}} {{Crazy}} {{DangerStripeShirt}} Chris begs the Wallflower to be his [[sweetheart]] so he won't have to pay $100 for a prostitute.

*'''[[Happy Sonichu Day]]''' ''17 [[March 2010]]'' (1:23) {{Comics}} {{Reason}} {{TanWideLines}} Chris congratulates himself for ten years of Sonichu, and tells his fans to stop pestering him about updates.

*'''[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]''' ''17 [[March 2010]]'' (:56) {{Racism}} {{Violence}} {{Rage}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{TanWideLines}} Chris drops an [[Niggos|N-Bomb]] on Surfshack Tito.

*'''[[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|C-Ya Later]]''' ''21 [[March 2010]]'' (6:05) {{Website}} {{Comics}} {{Reason}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{VertRedGreenShirt}} After witnessing the carnage on CWCipedia, Chris vows to stay off the internet. For real this time. Honest.

*'''[[Cleveland Show Voice Rant]]''' ''22 [[March 2010]]'' (1:06) {{Television}} {{reason}} {{VertRedGreenShirt}} Chris discusses the quality of the voice acting on [[Family Guy|The Cleveland Show]], 36 hours after vowing to leave the internet forever.

*'''[[F Abstinance]]''' ''28 [[March 2010]]'' (1:32) {{Sex}} {{Rage}} {{CaptainFalconShirt}} Chris condemns abstinence-based sex education, but for [[Virgin with rage|all the wrong reasons]].

==April 2010==

*'''[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]''' ''12 [[April 2010]]'' (4:28) {{Racism}} {{Reason}} {{Rage}} {{Audio}} {{Game Place}} Chris returns to the [[Game Place]] and calls the [[Michael Snyder|manager]] "Jew" when he refuses to admit him back. Audio only.

*'''[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]''' ''22 [[April 2010]]'' (5:03) {{Sex}} {{Crazy}} {{Jackie}} {{MountAndDoMe}} {{Cwcbra2}} {{Leaked}} Chris sets the record straight for his new [[Jackie e-mails|gal-pal]], performs [[Chris and sex|oral sex]] on the camera, and talks about his [[Muscle bra|bra]].

*'''[[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]''' ''23 [[April 2010]]'' (8:49) {{Autism}} {{Reason}} {{Cwcbra}} Chris talks about [[Autism]] while wearing a [[Muscle bra|bra]]. He also chastises men who are topless because nipples should stay a mystery.

==May 2010==

*'''[[I Pimp My Ride.MOV|I Pimp My Ride]]''' ''5 [[May 2010]]'' (:34) {{Video games}} {{Smug}} {{PokemonLeague}} Chris brags about ruining his PS3.

*'''[[100 2178]]''' ''8 [[May 2010]]'' (7:07) {{Tragedy}} {{Crazy}} {{OrangeSleeveless}} Chris sits in the dark and blames the Greene County school system for his having no friends.

*'''[[05142010]]''' ''15 [[May 2010]]'' (4:44) {{Autism}} {{Tragedy}} {{PityShirt}} Chris talks about a girl murdered by her boyfriend and how he's unable to socialize due to the trolls.

*'''[[Some Favored Comedians]]''' ''20 [[May 2010]]'' (9:53) {{Rumours}} {{Television}} {{Reason}} {{Comedy}} {{WhiteTShirt}} {{DenimJacket}} Chris mentions his family before analyzing voice acting in his favorite TV shows, and talking about his favorite comedians.

*'''[[100 2188]]''' ''27 [[May 2010]]'' (4:41) {{Website}} {{Homos}} {{Rage}} {{BlueTShirt}} {{DenimJacket}} Chris projects about trolls being autistic and obsessed with computers. He is also STRAIGHT.

*'''[[100 2189]]''' ''31 [[May 2010]]'' (1:56) {{Website}} {{Rumours}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} Chris makes clear that he still retains the rights to Sonichu despite the CWCipedia being under new ownership. He also encourages the trolls to work harder in order to bring him back to the internet.

==June 2010==

*'''[[6 June 2010]]''' (9:09) {{Rumours}} {{Reason}} {{RedBlackTrim}} {{Game Place}} Chris tries to explain why he was stalking [[Michael Snyder]] with a camera, and subsequent attempts at vehicular manslaughter. He then blames the internet for all his problems, again.<noinclude>LIST OF VIDEOS
{{usage|1=This template is used to generate a segment of the content on the [[List of Videos]] page. This way, the article itself is much easier to manage. The format for using this template is as follows: 

'''<pre>{{ListOfVideos/Jan-Jun2010}}</pre>'''

- Displays:{{ListOfVideos/Jan-Jun2010}}
}}

[[Category:Article content templates|{{PAGENAME}}]]</noinclude>

Template talk:FanChats

2011-03-03T08:28:04Z

Pyram1dhead:

In the future, I'd like to see the Mumble chats incorporated into this. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:47, 15 March 2009 (CET)

== Rename Dis Bitch? ==

I mean, most of these aren't really chats with fans. Maybe something like "Chris speaks" or "Recorded Conversations" or something.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 22:17, 3 April 2010 (UTC)
*Seconded. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 22:24, 3 April 2010 (UTC)
:I hate the formatting too. Needs a revamp. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 00:09, 4 April 2010 (UTC)

== New Kacey calls ==
For reference, here's how I numbered the new calls from /cwc/. Input welcome:

#[[Kacey Phone Call]]
#[[Kacey Call 2]]
#kacey 4 8 4 09
#kacey82809
#kc82909
#kc83109
#kc09109
#kc09209
#kc090309
#kc090409
#kc090709
#999kc
#kc091009
#kc9eleven
#kc91209
#kc91309
#kc091509
#kc91709
#kc91809
#kc92109
#kc92209
#kc92709
#kc92909
#kc10509
--[[User:Pyram1dhead|Pyram1dhead]] 00:26, 3 March 2011 (PST)

Talk:Kacey Call 12

2011-03-03T08:27:38Z

Pyram1dhead:

I really have no idea about the order of these audioclips, so I'm just kind of placing them wherever. If someone can give me a chronological list, I'll drop the overviews wherever they need to be. [[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 00:18, 3 March 2011 (PST)
:No problem. Right now the order is in HTML comments in the FanCharts template, but it's kinda fluid right now since there might be more to come. --[[User:Pyram1dhead|Pyram1dhead]] 00:21, 3 March 2011 (PST)
::For future reference: [[Template talk:FanChats#New Kacey calls]] --[[User:Pyram1dhead|Pyram1dhead]] 00:27, 3 March 2011 (PST)

Template talk:FanChats

2011-03-03T08:26:43Z

Pyram1dhead:

In the future, I'd like to see the Mumble chats incorporated into this. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:47, 15 March 2009 (CET)

== Rename Dis Bitch? ==

I mean, most of these aren't really chats with fans. Maybe something like "Chris speaks" or "Recorded Conversations" or something.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 22:17, 3 April 2010 (UTC)
*Seconded. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 22:24, 3 April 2010 (UTC)
:I hate the formatting too. Needs a revamp. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 00:09, 4 April 2010 (UTC)

== New Kacey calls ==
For reference, here's how I numbered the new calls from /cwc/. Input welcome:

#[[Kacey Phone Call]]
#[[Kacey Call 2]]
#kacey 4 8 4 90
#kacey82809
#kc82909
#kc83109
#kc09109
#kc09209
#kc090309
#kc090409
#kc090709
#999kc
#kc091009
#kc9eleven
#kc91209
#kc91309
#kc091509
#kc91709
#kc91809
#kc92109
#kc92209
#kc92709
#kc92909
#kc10509
--[[User:Pyram1dhead|Pyram1dhead]] 00:26, 3 March 2011 (PST)

Template talk:FanChats

2011-03-03T08:26:31Z

Pyram1dhead:

In the future, I'd like to see the Mumble chats incorporated into this. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:47, 15 March 2009 (CET)

== Rename Dis Bitch? ==

I mean, most of these aren't really chats with fans. Maybe something like "Chris speaks" or "Recorded Conversations" or something.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 22:17, 3 April 2010 (UTC)
*Seconded. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 22:24, 3 April 2010 (UTC)
:I hate the formatting too. Needs a revamp. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 00:09, 4 April 2010 (UTC)

== New Kacey calls ==
For reference, here's how I numbered the new calls from /cwc/. Input welcome:

#[[Kacey Phone Call]]
#[[Kacey Call 2]]
#kacey 4 8 4 90
#kacey82809
#kc82909
#kc83109
#kc09109
#kc09209
#kc090309
#kc090409
#kc090709
#999kc
#kc091009
#kc9eleven
#kc91209
#kc91309
#kc091509
#kc91709
#kc91809
#kc92109
#kc92209
#kc92709
#kc92909
#kc10509

Talk:Kacey Call 12

2011-03-03T08:21:45Z

Pyram1dhead:

Kacey Call 24

2011-03-03T08:12:56Z

Pyram1dhead: this is for the SHOWDOWN call

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category: Liquid Saga]]

Kacey Call 12

2011-03-03T08:12:01Z

Pyram1dhead: edit the FanChats template to see which number goes with which filename

Just a brief overview until the entire call is transcribed.

File Name: 999kc.mp3

*first yoga class for chris
*kacey trying to sound smart about medical stuff, chris doesn't care.
*chris trying to tell trolls that call him that kacey is his girlfriend, kacey said "we're just friends"
*unwilling to get a new cell phone number because he would have to update the number on PSN but it's too much effort
*chris talks about burger king food. says that oatmeal is veggies.
*talking about febreeze fabric softener smells. SO BORING. returned it after using because he didn't like the smell
*chris says that he needs to move out of his house and get a job before he learns to cook for himself
*kim told him to go to yoga class. he went i guess?
*chris trying to talk about how sitting in different positions makes it impossible to breathe. Kacey and him argue about it. no one cares.
*walking around mall = exercise
*gamestop employee recognized chris and took a picture with him
*chris gave blood. this means that someone has part of chris inside of them. THIS MEANS SOMEONE HAS CHRIS INSIDE OF THEM.
*chris trying to explain what giving plasma is to kacey despite the fact that she keeps saying over and over that she knows what it is.
*chris sent out sonichu 0 to marvel, dark horse, and archie
*kacey: "you know how you said i weighed a lot? how much do you think kim weighs?" "chris: 175-150, somewhere between there" "kacey: how much do you weigh?" "chris: last time i checked 215-220"
*chris actually seems interested in blood types.
*chris says that his mind goes blank because he is too creative for his thoughts
*chris says that the way the brain works is the same as computers: random access memory
*chris is writing a 500 word essay about autism for kacey

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category: Liquid Saga]]

Kacey Call 7

2011-03-03T08:11:10Z

Pyram1dhead: this was for call 12, not 7

Just a brief overview until the entire call is transcribed.

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category: Liquid Saga]]

Kacey Call 3

2011-03-03T01:24:16Z

Pyram1dhead: Created page with "In '''Kacey Call 3''', recorded a few hours after the previous phone call, a devastated Kacey confronts Ian about impersonating her boyfriend [[Liquid Chris|..."

In '''Kacey Call 3''', recorded a few hours after the [[Kacey Call 2|previous phone call]], a devastated Kacey confronts [[Ian]] about impersonating her boyfriend [[Liquid Chris|Chris]] over the phone.

==Transcript==

'''Chris:''' Hello?
 '''Kacey:''' ''[in tears]'' I can't believe you did that! What is ''wrong'' with you?! I mean, you didn't- you could have just told me something, you didn't even have to make him look so bad, just- w-what the hell?!
 '''Chris:''' Kacey, I'm sorry, I was trying to spare your feelings.
 '''Kacey:''' No! No, you weren't, why didn't you just tell me from the start?! I mean... I mean, what happens if he did something to me, or- what happens if ''you'' did something to me, you wanted me to come to ''your'' house! And... what, what were you gonna do? You think I wouldn't ''know?!''
 '''Chris:''' ...was trying to ease you into it, I'm sorry.
 '''Kacey:''' That's not easing someone into it! Just what were you gonna do, ''rape'' me?! What were you going to do?!
 '''Chris:''' No, no, no. I, I was, I was going to show you the true face of the real man.
 '''Kacey:''' ''[incoherent]'' ...man? Why the fuck would I love ''you?'' You tricked me too! Just... ''[sobs]'' I don't know, it's just, I mean... how ''could'' you? You're just as bad as him.
 '''Chris:''' Ugh... I know, I understand, I'm sorry.
 '''Kacey:''' No, no you're not, cause you would have told me this shit, and, and... ugh, I mean you had so, so many chances, you're just... it's fucking me, you were playing with me. You were ''playing'' with my heart, I mean what, so you could get laid out of it? So you could be... not a ''virgin'' anymore?
 '''Chris:''' No...no, no, no... I was trying to, uh... I was trying to earn... I was trying to be your friend. I was trying to, uh...
 '''Kacey:''' How, how is that being my friend?! How is that being my friend? Tricking me? I mean, you...were...''pretending'' to be the ''same person'' youre trying to save me from! I mean, why would I want to be your friend, much less your ''girl''friend? I mean, what were unique qualities that you have shown me now? ''[sighs]''
 '''Chris:''' I can't say off the top of my head, but I would do my best to make up for what I have done...
 '''Kacey:''' ''[cutting over]'' No, no, of course you can't! You know what? Exactly, this is ''exactly''... you can't, you can't do ''any'' of the things he did for me. You can't play the guitar, you don't have a job, you aren't in school! I mean, how did you even... ''[breaking down]'' I can't believe you fooled me, I can't believe that I did that, because you know even if he tricked me? I at least tried to stay true to him, and look what you did to me! Now not only that, you've made ''me'' a cheater.
 '''Chris:''' ''[sighs]'' Yeah...I hear you...
 '''Kacey:''' You're nothing... like... him. How am I just supposed to... I mean, you can't even ''say'' anything, and look what you did! Look what you ''did!''
 '''Chris:''' I am looking at what I did. I'm looking, that I have done a lot of damage.
 '''Kacey:''' I mean, you think I could go from him to ''you?'' I mean, just like that, just like, "Oh, look, I make Sonichu!" I mean, I just... like, you know what, do you even know what's right or wrong? Because even if what he did was wrong, he was at least ''there'' for me. And, and... I just don't fucking know anymore. Just what were you expecting? ''What'' were you expecting me to do, go "Oh, okay?!"
 '''Chris:''' No, no, I wasn't, I was not expecting anything. I mean, like you know, you know, he told everybody about [[14 Branchland Court]] [[Ruckersville]] Virginia 22968 and he was like... ''[incoherent]''
 '''Kacey:''' So that, so you could be a fat impostor too? So that makes it right, so that... ''['''Chris:''' Yeah...]'' It ''does?!'' It does?! Did you just say "yes" to me?
 '''Chris:''' No, no, no no no...I, I'm not even, I-I ''[stutters]'' ...okay, yeah. He was flaunting the address around, along with all the fake documents, the fake driver's license. If he has successfully fooled anyway into actually going to the home address, they would have found the real me anyway then realize that he was a troll... 
 '''Kacey:''' Doesn't matter, you've already put that info on the internet obviously, cause I went to your pages, and I went to the ED thing, and I went to everything. And I mean, ''you'' put yourself out there, so you were asking for it, but does that mean ''I'' had to be caught up in the middle? You could have told me. You...could...have...''told'' me. 

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?5z2hjddgc2n mp3 of phonecall]
{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category: Liquid Saga]]

Template:FanChats

2011-03-03T00:51:07Z

Pyram1dhead: christ, there's even more

{| id="toc" width="70%" style="text-align:left; clear:both;" align=center
|- style="background:#ccccff" align="center" width="95%"
| '''Chats with Chris'''
|-
| style="font-size:11px" |
'''[[Sonichu (IRC chat)|IRC]]:''' [''2008''] [[IRC (16 October 2008)|Oct 16]] | [[IRC (24 October 2008)|Oct 24]] | [[Chris's Sonichu IRC Chloe Introduction|Oct 26]] | [[IRC (26 November 2008)|Nov 26]] | [[IRC (13 December 2008)|Dec 13]] | [[IRC (15 December 2008)|Dec 15]] | [[IRC (17 December 2008)|Dec 17]] | [[IRC (18 December 2008)|Dec 18]] | [[IRC (22 December 2008)|Dec 22]] | [[IRC (27 December 2008)|Dec 27]] | [[IRC (28 December 2008)|Dec 28]] | [[IRC (31 December 2008)|Dec 31]] [''2009''] [[IRC (02 January 2009)|Jan 2]] | [[IRC (03 January 2009)|Jan 3]] | [[IRC (04 January 2009)|Jan 4]] | [[IRC (20 January 2009)|Jan 20]] | [[IRC (21 January 2009)|Jan 21]] | [[IRC (23 July 2009)|Jul 23]]

'''[[Mumble]]:''' [[Mumble 1|1]] | [[Mumble 2|2]] | [[Mumble 3|3]] | [[Mumble 3.5|3.5]] | [[Mumble 4|4]] | [[Mumble 5|5]] | [[Mumble 6|6]] | [[Mumble 7|7]] | [[Mumble 8|8]] | [[Mumble 9|9]] | [[Mumble 9.5|9.5]] | [[Mumble 10|10]] | [[Mumble 11|11]] | [[Mumble 12|12]]

'''[[BlueSpike PSN Chats]]:''' [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 1|1]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 2|2]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|3]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5|3.5]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7|3.7]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 4|4]]

'''BlueSpike Skype Logs:''' [[BlueSpike Skype Logs|1]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 2|2]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 3|3]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 4|4]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 5|5]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 6|6]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7|7]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 8|8]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 9|9]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 10|10]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 11|11]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 12|12]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 13|13]]

'''[[Sarah May Skype Logs]]'''

'''[[Alec Benson Leary calls]]:''' [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 1|1]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2|2]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 3|3]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 4|4]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 5|5]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 6|6]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 7|7]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|8]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|9]]

'''[[Vanessa Saga|Vanessa AIM chats]]:''' [[Vanessa AIM Chat 1|1]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 2|2]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 3|3]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 4|4]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 5|5]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 6|6]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 7|7]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 8|8]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|9]]

'''[[Kacey]] & [[Liquid Chris|Liquid Saga]]:''' [[SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE|SHOWDOWN]] | Kacey Calls ([[Kacey Phone Call|1]] | [[Kacey Call 2|2]] | [[Kacey Call 3|3]] | [[Kacey Call 4|4]] | [[Kacey Call 5|5]] | [[Kacey Call 6|6]] | [[Kacey Call 7|7]] | [[Kacey Call 8|8]] | [[Kacey Call 9|9]] | [[Kacey Call 10|10]] | [[Kacey Call 11|11]] | [[Kacey Call 12|12]] | [[Kacey Call 13|13]] | [[Kacey Call 14|14]] | [[Kacey Call 15|15]] | [[Kacey Call 16|16]] | [[Kacey Call 17|17]] | [[Kacey Call 18|18]] | [[Kacey Call 19|19]] | [[Kacey Call 20|20]] | [[Kacey Call 21|21]] | [[Kacey Call 22|22]] | [[Kacey Call 23|23]] | [[Kacey Call 24|24]]) | [[Father Call]] | [[Kacey and Liquid Call]] | [[The End For Real (Kacey call)|The End For Real]]

'''[[Jack Thaddeus]] calls:''' [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|1]]''' | '''[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|2]]''' | '''[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|3]]

'''[[Jackie]]:''' [[Jackie Chat 1|1]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 2|2]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 3|3]] | [[Jackie Chat 4|4]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 5|5]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 6|6]] | [[Jackie Chat 7|7]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 8|8]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 9|9]]''' | '''[[Lars Call]]'''

'''Other:''' [[CWC Cums for a Cat]] | [[Bob Walks In]] | [[Bob Walks In Aftermath]] | [[Julie Reveals Herself: The Prequel]] | [[Julie Reveals Herself]] | [[Car Pranks]] | [[Prank calls]] | [[Sydney Contacts]] | [[Matthew Noble call]]
|}<noinclude>{{usage|1=This is a navigational template (navbox) for articles documenting Chris's communication with [[fans]]. The format for using this template is as follows: 

'''<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{PAGENAME}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki>'''

- Displays:{{ {{PAGENAME}} }}
}}

[[Category:Navigational templates|{{PAGENAME}}]]</noinclude>

Template:FanChats

2011-03-03T00:35:30Z

Pyram1dhead: buttload of new calls on /cwc/

{| id="toc" width="70%" style="text-align:left; clear:both;" align=center
|- style="background:#ccccff" align="center" width="95%"
| '''Chats with Chris'''
|-
| style="font-size:11px" |
'''[[Sonichu (IRC chat)|IRC]]:''' [''2008''] [[IRC (16 October 2008)|Oct 16]] | [[IRC (24 October 2008)|Oct 24]] | [[Chris's Sonichu IRC Chloe Introduction|Oct 26]] | [[IRC (26 November 2008)|Nov 26]] | [[IRC (13 December 2008)|Dec 13]] | [[IRC (15 December 2008)|Dec 15]] | [[IRC (17 December 2008)|Dec 17]] | [[IRC (18 December 2008)|Dec 18]] | [[IRC (22 December 2008)|Dec 22]] | [[IRC (27 December 2008)|Dec 27]] | [[IRC (28 December 2008)|Dec 28]] | [[IRC (31 December 2008)|Dec 31]] [''2009''] [[IRC (02 January 2009)|Jan 2]] | [[IRC (03 January 2009)|Jan 3]] | [[IRC (04 January 2009)|Jan 4]] | [[IRC (20 January 2009)|Jan 20]] | [[IRC (21 January 2009)|Jan 21]] | [[IRC (23 July 2009)|Jul 23]]

'''[[Mumble]]:''' [[Mumble 1|1]] | [[Mumble 2|2]] | [[Mumble 3|3]] | [[Mumble 3.5|3.5]] | [[Mumble 4|4]] | [[Mumble 5|5]] | [[Mumble 6|6]] | [[Mumble 7|7]] | [[Mumble 8|8]] | [[Mumble 9|9]] | [[Mumble 9.5|9.5]] | [[Mumble 10|10]] | [[Mumble 11|11]] | [[Mumble 12|12]]

'''[[BlueSpike PSN Chats]]:''' [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 1|1]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 2|2]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|3]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5|3.5]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7|3.7]] | [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 4|4]]

'''BlueSpike Skype Logs:''' [[BlueSpike Skype Logs|1]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 2|2]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 3|3]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 4|4]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 5|5]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 6|6]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7|7]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 8|8]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 9|9]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 10|10]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 11|11]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 12|12]] | [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 13|13]]

'''[[Sarah May Skype Logs]]'''

'''[[Alec Benson Leary calls]]:''' [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 1|1]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2|2]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 3|3]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 4|4]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 5|5]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 6|6]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 7|7]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|8]] | [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|9]]

'''[[Vanessa Saga|Vanessa AIM chats]]:''' [[Vanessa AIM Chat 1|1]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 2|2]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 3|3]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 4|4]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 5|5]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 6|6]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 7|7]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 8|8]] | [[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|9]]

'''[[Kacey]] & [[Liquid Chris|Liquid Saga]]:''' [[SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE|SHOWDOWN]] | Kacey Calls ([[Kacey Phone Call|1]] | [[Kacey Call 2|2]] | [[Kacey Call 3|3]] | [[Kacey Call 4|4]] | [[Kacey Call 5|5]] | [[Kacey Call 6|6]] | [[Kacey Call 7|7]] | [[Kacey Call 8|8]] | [[Kacey Call 9|9]] | [[Kacey Call 10|10]] | [[Kacey Call 11|11]] | [[Kacey Call 12|12]] | [[Kacey Call 13|13]] | [[Kacey Call 14|14]] | [[Kacey Call 15|15]] | [[Kacey Call 16|16]] | [[Kacey Call 17|17]] | [[Kacey Call 18|18]]) | [[Father Call]] | [[Kacey and Liquid Call]] | [[The End For Real (Kacey call)|The End For Real]]

'''[[Jack Thaddeus]] calls:''' [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|1]]''' | '''[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|2]]''' | '''[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|3]]

'''[[Jackie]]:''' [[Jackie Chat 1|1]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 2|2]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 3|3]] | [[Jackie Chat 4|4]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 5|5]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 6|6]] | [[Jackie Chat 7|7]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 8|8]]''' | '''[[Jackie Chat 9|9]]''' | '''[[Lars Call]]'''

'''Other:''' [[CWC Cums for a Cat]] | [[Bob Walks In]] | [[Bob Walks In Aftermath]] | [[Julie Reveals Herself: The Prequel]] | [[Julie Reveals Herself]] | [[Car Pranks]] | [[Prank calls]] | [[Sydney Contacts]] | [[Matthew Noble call]]
|}<noinclude>{{usage|1=This is a navigational template (navbox) for articles documenting Chris's communication with [[fans]]. The format for using this template is as follows: 

'''<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{PAGENAME}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki>'''

- Displays:{{ {{PAGENAME}} }}
}}

[[Category:Navigational templates|{{PAGENAME}}]]</noinclude>

Kacey Call 2

2011-03-02T23:58:51Z

Pyram1dhead:

'''Kacey Call 2''' took place on 4 [[August 2009]], during the time when Chris was pretending to be [[Liquid Chris]]. The call occurred the day before they were to meet up with Chris hoping that he could [[cum]] all over Kacey.

==Transcript==
'''Chris:''' Hello?
 '''Kacey:''' Um hi, it's Kacey.
 '''Chris:''' Hey Kace. Yeah, you uh, you saw the video I uploaded?
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, I, you know, I really hate this about you, but I can't stay angry at you when you do things like this. So it just made me forget everything. I, I love just love that song, it’s so heartfelt.
 '''Chris:''' [pauses] Yeah, yeah, that song is one of my favorites as well, you know. Otherwise I wouldn’t’ve sung it.
 '''Kacey:''' Awwww. [pause] So um
 '''Chris:''' [speaking over Kacey] So anyways, uh…
 '''Kacey:''' You wanted me to call you?
 '''Chris:''' Uh, yeah, you know, uh, you know I read your e-mail, it was like, you know, you got angry at me, it just, made me feel a little upset at the moment.
 '''Kacey:''' Well, I mean, you were really like, I don’t know, you were just so weird earlier. And so I figured you were mad at me or something and it’s just
 '''Chris:''' [interrupting] Oh no, no no
 '''Kacey:''' I meant it, I meant it when I said if we were ever torn apart I would totally die of heart break. So, I’m sorry if I just, you know… I, I just love you so much.
 '''Chris:''' I understand. I appreciate that. [Kacey giggles] [Cannot understand what Chris is saying] Ok anyway, anyway I was just alooking at a picture of my mom and dad to send you, I’mma just send it to you right now.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, oh, OK!
 '''Chris:''' It’s nice picture of my mom and dad from uh, let’s see, I think it was from my dad, my dad’s last birthday.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, OK, awesome. So you’re sending it to my e-mail?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. It, it’s a good picture of them really.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh cool, I can’t wait.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, at least yah know what, at least you’ll know what they look like when you get here later.
 '''Kacey:''' Right! Exactly! [giggle] So, um, besides that what’s on your mind?
 '''Chris:''' [pause] Oh, what’s… on… my… you know I just… I miss you. I miss talking to you, I was waiting for you.
 '''Kacey:''' Awwww. Aw, you see, now I feel so much better. I can’t wait to come over later today. 
 '''Chris:''' I can’t wait to have you here. [Kacey giggles followed by a pause] Yeah.
 '''Kacey:''' So, um, you’re still cooking me something right?
 '''Chris:''' Oh yeah, I got some ri-, I uh, I’m going to have some rigatoni in the oven for you.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, I thought it was risotto, but, I love rigatoni too, so that’s OK.
 '''Chris:''' Risotto. Risotto? I thought… I’m sorry, I got mixed up again. Risotto…
 '''Kacey:''' It’s OK, it’s cute, we’ll do risotto some other time. So, um, do you have any other plans for us that night?
 '''Chris:''' [pauses] Hmmmm, other plans? Well we’ll hang out, well we could hang out in my room for a while you know, talk some more and then eventually we c-, we could get around to some love makin’. 
 '''Kacey:''' Ou-hoo, that sounds awesome!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah.
 '''Kacey:''' So, uh, go into detail, what’re we going to do?
 '''Chris:''' [pauses] Uh… whatta we gonna do during our love makin’?
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah!
 '''Chris:''' Oh yeah, I think I remember telling you I was going to put my dick between those guys, that thing about, uh, strapping you and then putting my dick between your breasts and just letting it out on your face,
 '''Kacey:''' Uh huh
 '''Chris:''' And then licking it off [Kacey giggles]and making out with you and exchanging it.
 '''Kacey:''' Mmmm.
 '''Chris:''' Do you remember?
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah I remember, but I like hearing it from you.
 '''Chris:''' Oh yeah, you love hearing it from me. You love my hand drawing style.
 '''Kacey:''' Uh, sure, I don’t know what that has to do with this, but…[giggles]
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, well you know, I draw well, I draw, I draw with my hands…
 '''Kacey:''' Uh huh…
 '''Chris:''' Pretty much uh, pretty much gives you that sensation when you uh… [pause] when I massage you and press your breasts.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, that’s awesome. So, you know, just thinking, I hate to change the subject, but, um, so how long did it take you to master your art style?
 '''Chris:''' How long did it take me? My life time.
 '''Kacey:''' Life time?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah!
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, so like you’re always improving!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah! I took, I took a lot of art classes in my life time, from uh, from primary to high school.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, so is there any other way you practice it?
 '''Chris:''' [pauses] Sorry, I didn’t quite understand the question. 
 '''Kacey:''' Like, um, is there any way you do things outside art classes, like any tips you have for, um, your art, something you do to practice?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you know, I draw. I draw by hand. Sometime sculpt.
 '''Kacey:''' Ok. So do you draw anything else other than, uh, Sonichu?
 '''Chris:''' Oh yeah, I got a whole book of, uh, other art work. I created home-, I created, when I was about, back when I was playing Pokemon trading card game, this was like a long time ago, I created a whole gallery of homemade Pokemon trading cards, even homemade Yu-Gi-Oh cards. Never played them, I just created them for fun with my, with my homemade, with my own thoughts, Pokemon characters.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, that’s cool…
 '''Chris:''' And this with Sonichu, and this with Sonichu and Rosechu and even just, and even a whole bunch like looking for. You know there’s like, you know my very first homemade Pokemon card I did, uh, excuse me, my, uh, television’s playing, I gotta get it.
 '''Kacey:''' Ok, it’s cool.
 '''Chris:''' I mean, I mean I was, I mean I was in another, I was in another room but I just [unable to understand] but anyways, my first Pokemon card ever… Ok, this was, this was inspired when Nintendo Power ran an April Fool’s Joke about how to catch Luigi as a wild Pokemon.
 '''Kacey:''' Uh huh! 
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you know, you gotta catch, you gotta catch Lickitung, turn the GameBoy upside down, and then Lickitung, Lickitung turns into Luigi.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, oh! I got your picture! Um, awwwww your parents look so sweet.
 '''Chris:''' Aren’t they? Yeah…
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, I mean, your dad looks just like you! How long have they been married?
 '''Chris:''' They have been married since 1980. They got married on June 7th.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh June 7th, that’s cool.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, so they’ve been married my age plus 2 years. Twenty nine.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh! Oh cool!
 [long pause]
 '''Chris:''' Oh actually, uh, actually you know uh, I guess I’ll uh, go ahead and sent it to you, but, uh, because of a favor a friend of mine, that I ah, that a friend of mine did for me earlier today, I uh…
 '''Kacey:''' Which friend?
 '''Chris:''' It was like, it was like an internet favor, you know, uh, uh…
 '''Kacey:''' Huh?
 '''Chris:''' Recovering my, recovering my pass-, recovering my password which is like impossible to do, he’s like somebody, I don’t know, like somebody got into, uh, into my YouTube account or something, but anyway…
 '''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Oh God! Those trolls!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, but anyway, anyway, I got, anyway, managed to get that back and uh, I returned the favor to the uh, to my, uh, to my gal-pal who helped me here. Which is strange.
 '''Kacey:''' Who’s that? Who’s that?
 '''Chris:''' Her name is Kate.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, oh, you mentioned her before. So, uh, how is she? What did you do for her? 
 '''Chris:''' Oh, yeah, well, you see, yeah, I’m looking up the picture of this drawing I did right now, I had to take it with my camera because my, uh, printer is uh, printer/scanner/copier is out of order.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, oh, huh, so I guess I’m not going to be in the comics anytime soon, huh? You know I would love to be!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I mean, uh, I mean, I mean I do a whole bunch of, uh, drawings outside the, uh, co-, outside the, uh, comics.
 '''Kacey:''' Are you going to make some of me?
 '''Chris:''' [pauses] Mmm, I, uh, am I gon-, am I going put you in the comics?
 '''Kacey:''' Yes please!
 '''Chris:''' I might.
 '''Kacey:''' I would love it! I mean that’s been my dream since I’ve seen them.
 '''Chris:''' Oh yeah. You just love to see me, you just love to see me in my, in the old red, white and blue. Just uh, being, just uh, being with you in the uh, in the, uh, comic world.
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah! Yeah! It’d be awesome, just like, you know… now![giggles]
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, just like now and tomorrow!
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah! [pause] So, um, about your comics, I mean, are they going to, like, take off or anything? Liiiiiiike, you know with Dark Horse?
 '''Chris:''' Oh! Oh! Oh yeah, well, I’mma workin’ on how to get in touch with Dark Horse. I’m also thinking about DC and Marvel. I thought about, ah, Archie because, you know, they, they originally did the Sonic the Hedgehog comic book series, so I’ve into, been into, so I’ve been into them for a long time, you know. You know, because Sonic the Hedgehog is like my life time hero. Actually not really all my life long, I mean, it’s just like, you know since he came out back in 1990. Be- You know before him who my hero, who my hero was? [short short pause giving Kacey no chance to guess] The American Rabbit.
 '''Kacey:''' Who’s that?
 '''Chris:''' It was a ni-, it was a, it was a basically only d-, only a, they only released it in one movie called The Adventures of The American Rabbit. It was like, ah, it was a white rabbit named Rob, but then all he had to do to become a superhero was just run very fast and he becomes this pastry, patriotic colored rabbit with roller skates.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, um, ok…
 '''Chris:''' You can look it up!
 '''Kacey:''' Ok, I will, but I mean I thought Dark Horse already got in touch with you and they already signed you on. Maybe I got that mixed up?
 '''Chris:''' [pauses] …uh, no, I’m still waiting for Dark Horse to, uh, sort out the details with the, with me, between me and them.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, oh, ok.
 '''Chris:''' Uh, anyway, uh, anyway, uh, just getting into my e-mail again, I, I’m going to send you the uh, drawings I did for, uh, Kate.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh yeah, please, please do. So, um, how much are they offering you, like is an offer on the table?
 '''Chris:''' Uhhhh, we haven’t got, uh, we haven’t, uh, we have not gotten to the whole details yet, but I, but you know I’ll let you know.
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, I mean, I, I definitely want to, I’m just curious, I just don’t want you to think that’s the only reason I’m with you. I, I mean I love you.
 '''Chris:''' hmm… My heart goes out to you too very very much with LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!
 '''Kacey:''' [giggles] So, um yeah, I guess I’ll, I’ll wait for this picture, that’s going to be cool, so um, you wanna tell me more about what you’re doing with me tomorrow?
 '''Chris:''' What I’m doing while I wait for you tomorrow? Well I’m gonna be fixing up the, uh, fix the, uh, rigatoni, even though I forgot what the other word now…
 '''Kacey:''' The risotto, don’t worry about it.
 '''Chris:''' … with the rittoni, riss a roni, I’m trying anyway! [Chris laughs] Oh my memory sometimes fails me. You know sometimes when I, sometimes when I talk, it’s like you know I have to space my words because sometimes I actually, uh, uh, sometimes I’m so tired, or whatever, my mind just spaces out and I gotta like collect my thoughts between, uh, in between sessions of words or I
 '''Kacey:''' [overlapping] Right…
 '''Chris:''' sometimes I just, I just, I just, I just stutter, you know?
 '''Kacey:''' Uh huh.
 '''Chris:''' It’s been …
 '''Kacey:''' [trying to interrupt] “So….”
 '''Chris:''' [not stopping] going on like that for a long time ever since I put Sonichu on the internet about two thou- ‘bout two thousand four. On the original Sonichu site.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh. Oh, ok. So umm…
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, been doin’ it since about 2004, even though his birth date was, is, is original day of drawing was March 17th 2000.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, cool.
 '''Chris:''' In front of, in front of Ms. Chalifoux class room at Manchester High School in Chesterfield County.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, cool! Well, um, really quickly, um since now you have more time, today, tomorrow, whichever, um, can you record you cooking my rigatoni/risotto still? [some other voice says “Hello”] You know, cuz you couldn’t do it if I came today but, you know, please? 
 '''Chris:''' Yeeeaaahhh, well, I’ll see if I, I’ll see if, I’ll see if I, I’ll see if I can deal, ok sweetheart?
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, that’s all I ask. Thanks.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. I do what I can for…
 '''Kacey:''' So are you going to show me all the sights and everything too? 
 '''Chris:''' I’ll show you, uh, yeah, I mean, well, you know, if you had [weird audio drop out] aww shoot, I just, I, I just sent the wrong picture by mistake. Ech…
 '''Kacey:''' Ok…
 '''Chris:''' I’m sa-, I’m a, I got a little, I got a little, I distract myself…
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, it’s just your parents again, ok. That’s ok.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah… I mean, I mean, help me out, we’re only human. We’re allowed to make our share of mistakes. That’s a song there, that’s actually called “You’re Only Human Second Wind” from Billy Joel. It’s like, it’s a classic. 
 '''Kacey:''' Well, um, do you want me to call you before, I, uh, leave for today? You know, like before I leave for you?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, call me before you make your way over here.
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah!
 '''Chris:''' That would be good.
 '''Kacey:''' I mean that way I’ll be able to let you know how my car is doing and all that.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, oh, yeah, here we go…
 '''Kacey:''' So excited!
 '''Chris:''' I, I sent you the drawing. I sent you the drawing. You’re going to love it. It actually relates to like, you know the details I had left obscure, everythi- uh, evra, uh, that’s right, ever ah, ever since I started drawing the comics, like, you know, it’s like you know, defa, you know Sonichu, Rosechu,
 '''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Oh are those Sonichu and Rosechu babies?! 
 '''Chris:''' Yeah!
 '''Kacey:''' That’s so cute!
 '''Chris:''' Sonichu and Rosechu have been married since March 17th 2006.
 '''Kacey:''' [pause] Oh, oh, that’s quite, I didn’t know about that. Um…
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, well, it’s a recent detail, I’ve recently had it, like yeah, it, ub uh, it’s a fact. You didn’t think they were just living together the whole time? [Kacey “Yeah, um…] Yeah, they’re basically, they’re basically, basically
 '''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Chris, Chris? Yeah, yeah, real quick, I hate to interrupt you but you’re going to wear your beautiful brown shirt tomorrow right? Cuz I mean that’s what I’ve seen you first in, you know it just makes so… [giggles] you know…
 '''Chris:''' I’m sorry, I didn’t quite understand it, uh, am I going to be wearing my what?
 '''Kacey:''' Your brown shirt! You know…
 '''Chris:''' Oh… the brown shirt…
 '''Kacey:''' The first shirt I’ve seen you in! Our shirt!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. I. Uh. I’ll put on the brown shirt.
 '''Kacey:''' [giggles] Oh…
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I’ll put on the brown shirt for you
 '''Kacey:''' So… 
 '''Chris:''' …and I’ll be wearing my medallion…
 '''Kacey:''' Awesome!
 '''Chris:''' …my original medallion, in all it’s wonderful clay goodness with the Shrinky Dinks in the back and the hand writing as well.
 '''Kacey:''' WHAT? Oh Chris, you are such a kidder! [laughter] Ok, so, um…
 '''Chris:''' Yep, but, any, uh, anyup, uh, anyway, as if to let you know, ummmm… just to let you know about, well ah, what I wrote in there, ah, ina, in the, in the speech balloons, alright yeah, I just, two Rosees, the one that’s purple has the shiny Rosee, her name is Christine.
 '''Kacey:''' Uh huh.
 '''Chris:''' And the one with the mirror is Cera with a C.
 '''Kacey:''' Uh huh.
 '''Chris:''' And we got, and then we got Robbie Sonee.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh yeah, that’s cool, but um, I’m going to have to go to sleep if I wanna, you know, go to school and be able to drive tomorrow and everything. So, is there anything you want to tell me? Anything at all? Cuz you know I love how there’s no secrets between us.
 '''Chris:''' Ah yes. Ok. Well, You know how I, how I contradicted the vest, I actually have a vest of my own.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh I get it, you don’t want to wear so you’re not like the impostor. No, that’s cool. 
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you know I actually got it from a Goodwill like a bunch of my clothes I’ve gotten, but I cut, but it was like ah, it was like a denim jacket so I cut off the sleeves with a pair of, ah, cocktail super sheers. 
 '''Kacey:''' That’s cool, but, uh you, you’re doing the video for me too so I’ll be able to see when I wake up, right? Cuz, um, I really gotta go to sleep soon.
 '''Chris:''' Uh, yeah, I’ll get to that.
 '''Kacey:''' If not, you know I’d love to stay on the phone with you, but you know… [giggles]
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I understand, ok, I love talking to you.
 '''Kacey:''' Ok, I love talking to you to, but wait, you have my video right? It’s coming right? 
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, yeah, video for the, uh, riga-, uh rigatoni…
 '''Kacey:''' Well that and the one about the impostor!
 '''Chris:''' Ah the, oh yeah, the one about hating the impostor.
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, yeah, I am working on that.
 '''Kacey:''' Ok, well I’m going to go ahead and go to sleep because I would not miss tomorrow for the world because it’s going to be much better to see each in real life, right?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you’ll get to see my father and my mother.
 '''Kacey:''' I’m really more excited about seeing you. Even though I want to meet them but like I said, I’m coming for you.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you know, but just to let you know, my mom and my father will come and greet you first so, like, you know
 '''Kacey:''' That’s so awesome.
 '''Chris:''' It’ll be a way for you to get to know him a little bit.
 '''Kacey:''' Ok, well um, I tell you this tomorrow, we can discuss it tomorrow, but I really gotta go to bed. So, um, I’ll talk to you later, love you!
 '''Chris:''' I, bye bye Kace! Take care! [kissing noise]

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?zgfmopa0zmv67wh mp3 of phonecall]
{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category: Liquid Saga]]

Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey

2011-02-27T03:07:12Z

Pyram1dhead: /* Part 2 */

{{Transcription}}

[[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey]] is a three-part series of videos that was leaked out onto the internet on [[February 2011|February 21, 2011]] by one [http://www.youtube.com/user/MiHiVidz MiHiVidz] on [[Youtube]]. The series showcases the long-lost phone conversation between [[Kacey]] and [[Solid Chris]] on [[November 2009|10 November 2009]] that led to Kacey severing all connections from Chris, the [[Kacey#Marriage to Liquid|marriage of Liquid Chris and Kacey the following day]], and the resulting [[CWC is Sad|video]] in which Ian tried not to cry over losing his [[Chris and reality|potential]] [[sweetheart]].

== Part 1 ==
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey, Part 1
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|oFDnyny_9Ls}}
| Stardate = 10 November 2009
| Featuring = [[Solid Chris]]; [[Kacey]]
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| previous = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey|First]]
| next = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey#Part 2|Part 2]]
}}

''[Done up to 08:00, more to come later]''

'''Chris:''' Hello?
 '''Kacey:''' Hi, Chris. It's Kacey.
 '''Chris:''' Oh, hey Kacey.
 '''Kacey:''' I-I got Kim's e-mail, she said to call you?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah, we need--yeah, uh, I feel like we need to, uh, talk, you know, [[Kacey and Liquid Call|sort out what happened the other night]]. Yeah, I did not mean--I did not mean to ignore you, and I was aware you were there and I'm sorr--I'm sorr--I wanted to call you guys back.
 '''Kacey:''' [speaks over Chris] Well, you didn't really...act like I was there, I, like, I'm pretty sure you just straight-out ignored everything I said.
 '''Chris:''' [makes a strange grunting noise] Yeah, yeah well let me talk about that. You see, uh, I have, uh, what--one of my problems is that I have [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tunnel_vision tunnel vision]. You know, it's like, uh, when, like, [[Autism|you concentrate on one thing and you're pretty much set until its done]]. And, uh, and Chris was--
 '''Kacey:''' [speaks over Chris] It--It--It doesn't matter, it made me feel like [[Liquid Chris|Chris]] is more important than I was. You were more concerned about what he saying even though you think they're lies, than what I was saying even though I'm saying the truth. I mean, it's like, it's like you wanted him more than you wanted me.
 '''Chris:''' Kacey...That's not true. That's not true.
 '''Kacey:''' But--But I mean, if you have tunnel vision shouldn't your tunnel vision have been pointed at ''me'' and not ''him''?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you see, another one of my flaws is, uh, when I get really [[stressed]] my mind tends to blank out and my problem solving skills, uh, pretty much, uh, temporary [[Chris and English|[sic]]] go down the toilet there. And...it just blank up and it justs really blanks me out, and, don't--
 '''Kacey:''' I know, but what's very important to me is that I have someone who can defend me, you weren't even defending me at all, you were just [[tard rage|screaming]] at him. I need someone who's quick on their feet. I mean, did you realize how much I was hurt last night?
 '''Chris:''' ...Yeah, I realize how much you were hurt, um, I'm very sorry about that, I real-I realize what a heel I was.
 '''Kacey:''' Alright, but did you really realize that, or did someone have to tell you that?
 '''Chris:''' Nope, I realized it. No one had to tell me. [pause] I did talk to Kim about it, though.
 '''Kacey:''' Well I know you talked to Kim, she's the one who e-mailed me.
 '''Chris:''' ...Yep. But, anyway, Kacey, I do love you. I really do. I'm very sorry I ignored you.
 '''Kacey:''' But, you haven't even tried to contact me until Kim told you to! I mean, how can you say you love me or care about me, and you were just going to, like, okay, I was so hurt, and I, I mean, what would you have done, I mean, if you didn't talk to me? I mean, I could have just gone off and done whatever, you would have been out of sight, out of mind. You couldn't even send a simple e-mail. I mean, it's like you didn't even care that I was hurt or crying or anything.
 '''Chris:''' No, I di-I did care. I just, uh, I was under st--I was under the shock, too.
 '''Kacey:''' What shock? There was no shock!
 '''Chris:''' You know, realizing what a heel I was and how hurt you were...and that made me feel hurt. You know? 'Cause...
 '''Kacey:''' Then, why didn't you try to contact me? You would think you want to if you just hurt someone you, um, supposedly love.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you're right, I should have, yeah, I should have contacted you sooner. I just feel I-I thought--
 '''Kacey:''' You were too busy playing [[video games]] again, weren't you?
 '''Chris:''' No, I just thought--I just thought that you might need your spa--you might need some space, you know?
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, 'cause I'm hurting so you're just going to let me hurt all alone, or-or-or worse, in your opinion, you were gonna let me be with Chris, I mean, what did you think was gonna happen? I mean, you were playing video games today anyway, don't lie to me, I know you were.
 '''Chris:''' Okay, I played some video games. I played some video games.
 '''Kacey:''' See? Those are more important than me, too! How the heck are you supposed to have a [[girlfriend]] if you can't even talk to her unless her friend tells you to do it? You're just going to sit around and play video games all day, I mean, I could be hurt or sick or something, and you wouldn't know because your video games are more important.
 '''Chris:''' No, Kacey, you are more important. And if I- [Chris begins to speak, but Kacey interrupts]
 '''Kacey:''' But you're not acting like it at all.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, maybe I'm not acting like uh guh, m-maybe I'm not giving that impression right now. But Kacey- [Chris is interrupted]
 '''Kacey:''' Or ever.
 '''Chris:''' But Kacey, please believe me. You are very important. [[Chris and English|Because you are kind, caring]] [[China|woman]]. And you mean a lot to me. And I would really be hurt if something happened to you. And I will defend you. I really would. (Chris mumbles incoherently here)
 '''Kacey:''' But you never listen to me. You don't act like it. These are all just empty, meaningless words to me right now.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, y-I-I do listen to you.
 '''Kacey:''' No you don't! You haven't stopped eating McDonald's, you haven't gone jogging, you still play video games, you still ignore me. Name one thing that you do listen to me about. ONE thing.
 '''Chris:''' I did listen to you, on the fact that I should not go to McDonald's. And I have- (Interrupted)
 '''Kacey:''' But I know you've been eating at McDonald's. 
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I, uh, well, um, okay, yes, I was eating at McDonald's for a little while. 
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, and it's all fast food, you still go to fast food, I know you do.
 '''Chris:''' [[sigh|*stress sigh*]], I, okay, I have not gone to McDonald's for over a week. 
 '''Kacey:''' Or ANY fast food. 
 '''Chris:''' [[Lie|I have not gone to any fast food, have not eaten the fast food, for over a week.]] 
 '''Kacey:''' Then [[Semen|what]] have you been eating? What did you eat tonight? 
 '''Chris:''' I have been-I have been eating mostly TV Dinners. '''Kacey:''' Like what? 
 '''Chris:''' Like Michelina, or Banquet.
 '''Kacey:''' [[Chris_and_health|Have you looked at the nutritional value of those]]? Most of those are like, 300% sodium. That's just as bad, if not worse, because sodium can be just as bad as fat. Why don't you freshly prepare some food? I mean, even getting something at a deli is better. You should be making meals, you said you could cook. Or was that a lie too?
 '''Chris:''' ...I can cook. 
 '''Kacey:''' Then why don't you?
 '''Chris:''' Because I-because I don't have the individual ingredients at the time. 
 '''Kacey:''' (incredulous)...Then go buy them. 
 '''Chris:''' I will. I'm going to buy the individual ingredients to make- to make da better food. 
 '''Kacey:''' Why haven't you already? I mean, if you can't even take the initiative to cook your own food... I mean, why haven't you done this throughout your life?! Like, you're just lying to me again to make yourself look better, but I know you're never going to do it! I know you're not. 
 '''Chris:''' I am. I am going to do it. I am going to do it. [long, awkward pause] I have been working on making myself better. I have been going out jogging.
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, like, for like, what? Five minutes? I run five miles, 2.5 at the... least. I mean, you should be able to jog two miles by now if you were even trying. And you don't listen to- [Chris tries to speak over her, saying "I am trying."] me when I'm trying to tell you I'm worried about how you're probably losing muscle mass or anything. I mean-
 '''Chris:''' I do- I listen to you and like... I-I-I really ap'riciate your concern, but that concern makes me think, and it makes me act... Truly.
 '''Kacey:''' That's- I mean, I saw those [[11042009 51 50|videos when you were trying to lift lemonade...]] Those weren't fifty pounds. I mean, that's not even a workout, anyway, that's not even balanced. Get some real weights. I mean, that's just gonna hurt you, 'cuz you're displacing the weight.
[pause]
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I'm going to do a pair of fifty pound weights...
 '''Kacey:''' Either way, it shouldn't have been that hard, you shouldn't have struggled with something that weighed like, what, five, seven pounds?
 '''Chris:''' Okay, well maybe I- Okay, I exa- I exa- I likely exaggerated when I said that they were each fifty.
 '''Kacey:''' That's a uge exaggeration! That's a ''big'' difference!
 '''Chris:''' They were, like, more than twenty pounds apiece.
 '''Kacey:''' Kim said they were ten pounds. I'm not even sure if it's that much.
 '''Chris:''' Okay, well... okay, I-I do not claim to actually know how many pounds one of those actually is...
 '''Kacey:''' Then you shouldn't have.
 '''Chris:''' But, it felt like at least twenty.
 '''Kacey:''' No it's not. I'm looking it up on Google right now and it says around eight, ten pounds. I mean, it's just [[Honor roll|simple math and conversion]].
 '''Chris:''' Okay, well...
 '''Kacey:''' I mean, how hard is it to look it up, so you don't look stupid?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you're right, I coud've- I could've looked it up. I just didn't- I did not think about that. I did not think of that. One of my faults, sometimes I don't think of everything.
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, do you ever think, cause I'm starting to think you don't, cause you've been making a ''lot'' of mistakes lately. And... it's really, really, been making ''me'' think. I mean, I'm tired of the excuses. 
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I'm ti- I, I don't like excuses either.
 '''Kacey:''' Then why do you make them all the time? That's all you ever do.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm. Okay, maybe- okay. I have made some excuses in the past.
 '''Kacey:''' You make a ''lot'' of excuses in the past. You make any excuse, you ever do, it's always "[[THAT IS MY HOUSE|I'm working on it]]," or "I'm thinking about it," like, whenever you say stuff like that I know it's not going to get done. I mean, that's really bad, when... I already ''know'' you're not going to do anything by the words you say. You're just gonna continue to make excuses. You left me alone for several days after you heard how upset I was! The hell? You really think I want a boyfriend like that?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you ta- yeah, you would not want a boyfriend like that. But, I ca-yeah, I mean, I realize that...
 '''Kacey:''' Exactly, so, you see what I'm saying. Right?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I understand... what you are saying. And I could be better, and I am willing to improve.
 '''Kacey:''' Sssomehow, I don't really think you're go.
 '''Chris:''' I am going to improve on that.
 '''Kacey:''' Well, you haven't yet, so... why would I believe you now?
 '''Chris:''' ''[long silence]'' Okay, you have every right to question that, but... please believe me, I mean, ya know, one thing that- ya know, I would be, I would be ''glad'' to be there for you, but... I don't know your address.
 '''Kacey:''' That doesn't matter, you should be able to be there for me otherwise. You haven't earned that address. I mean, is that really all you've got? I mean... and after that comic, why would I want to give you my address? You're just going to shoot [[Liquid Chris|Chris]] or me anyway!
 '''Chris:''' I, I promise you, I would not shoot anybody for real. I do not even own a real gun.
 '''Kacey:''' Doesn't mean you couldn't get one, I could get a gun and I don't own one. 
 '''Chris:''' I do not, I have no intention on getting a real gun in the near future. 
 '''Kacey:''' I mean, but it's so easy to get guns, do you remember the Virginia Tech shooter? It's easy. Doesn't matter, all you need to do is get mad again, then you'll just ignore me anyway.
 '''Chris:''' I promise you that I would not ignore you in the future, even when I get- even when I get... riled up, and angry, I would not ignore you.
 '''Kacey:''' I don't know, you've ignored me enough, don't you think it might be a little too late? I mean, that comic really scared me, I mean, I'm pretty sure... you shot him in the comic so he couldn't follow and take me back. That's just ''creepy''. That's psychotic, that's delusional.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. I, I agree with you, that... I may have some issues to resolve with Chris. Like, you know, I definitely should... like, you know, try... to sit in front of him... and discuss things, calmly...
 '''Kacey:''' You think he's gonna do that after he saw that comic?!


== Part 2 ==
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey, Part 2
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|Lmf1rD72zwI}}
| Stardate = 10 [[November 2009]]
| Featuring = [[Solid Chris]]; [[Kacey]]
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| previous = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey#Part 1|Part 1]]
| next = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey#Part 3|Part 3]]
}}

''[Done up to 04:00, more to come later]''

 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I mean, obviously he definitely has other skeletons in his closet-
 '''Kacey:''' This isn't about him; this isn't about him. This is about you. And I'm tired of you talking bad about him.
 '''Chris:''' OK, yeah. I don- I don't like talking bad about people, but-
 '''Kacey:''' But you do all the time! 
 '''Chris:''' Well, only... just, only- ok, well.
 '''Kacey:''' Tell me again why you think you're better than him. Go ahead.
 '''Chris:''' Because I'm- because I'm loyal.
 '''Kacey:''' You're not very loyal; you haven't called me. You're not very honest; you lie to me all the time.
 '''Chris:''' Because I tell you- I tell you everything I'm- from my heart. And [when] I tell you I love you, I mean it.
 '''Kacey:''' That's lying. You can't even send me a simple email to make sure I'm OK. Like, I don't think you get how hurt and angry I am, so no, I want something that you're better at him at that is real, because your lies come from your heart too.
 '''Chris:''' [Stuttering incoherently for an rebuttal] Ok, I have made the mistake of lying at-
 '''Kacey:''' A lot.
 '''Chris:''' A lot, a lot, but a lot of the things that I have told you in the past were true. I swear, I have told you a lot of truth like you know, like when I tell you about myself on the kind of person I am, those are true. And how I feel about you, that's true, too.
 '''Kacey:''' How do I know that?
 '''Chris:''' And my hit-
 '''Kacey:''' How do I know you're not just ready to drop me, because it's easier, or something stupid?
 '''Chris:''' Because... we started out as friends, and I-
 '''Kacey:''' That's right, friends.
 '''Chris:''' Well, hang on, hang on! We started out as friends with the possibility of a relationship, and I would like a relationship.
 '''Kacey:''' How would we start off as friend with the possibility of a relationship? You lied to me the first time you talked to me.
 '''Chris:''' OK, I did the things-
 '''Kacey:''' You pretended to be my boyfriend, my fiance.
 '''Chris:''' OK, I did pretend to be Chris. But that was in a case, to let you know, that he was who you- he was not who you thought he was. You know, he was- He was pretending to be me.
 '''Kacey:''' He wasn't pretending to be you! This is what I don't get. Stop saying he's pretending to be you. Just 'cause you guys have the same name doesn't mean he was pretending to be you, because you two are two totally different people.
 '''Chris:''' OK, yes, we are two totally different people, and I can list the whole number of things that I am and he's no- that he's not that he claims.
 '''Kacey:''' Whatever, I can list the whole things he does that you can't. He can play guitar. He doesn't lie to me. He jogs with me. He does stuff with me. He doesn't sit around and play video games. He has a job. He has a college education. He goes to school. I mean, wh- the hell? I mean, c'mon. Do it, do it. Sho- Tell me. Tell me what's he's not doing and I bet you I can refute everything.
 '''Chris:''' ''[stutters, then sighs]''
 '''Kacey:''' So you don't have anything, do you?
 '''Chris:''' Well... okay, well, I can definitely tell you that he did not go to Manchester High School.
 '''Kacey:''' That doesn't matter to me. What matters is he's in school now. And that he's gonna make himself better.
 '''Chris:''' He is... yes, okay, he is...
 '''Kacey:''' His high s- I told you before, high school doesn't matter to me, it's stupid.
 '''Chris:''' Well, you get your education through high school. You need your high school diploma to move on to college...
 '''Kacey:''' Not really, anyone can get their GED and blaze through it. What matters even more than high school education is like your SATs and your ACTs. College is what's important to me. Because that shows a future. I mean, I bet you don't even know what a GED is.
 '''Chris:''' I have a general idea of what a GED is. It's a sort of degree.
 '''Kacey:''' ...No... it's... in place of a diploma. I mean, did you even take the SAT?
 '''Chris:''' Yes, I did take the SAT in high school.
 '''Kacey:''' What was your scores?
 '''Chris:''' ...I do not remember.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh come on, you've got to remember. Nobody forgets their SAT scores.
 '''Chris:''' It, uh, with a small detail like that, and I felt it was small... it was in one ear and out the other.
 '''Kacey:''' Okay, was it- was it above 1100? Was it above 1200? Was it above... anything like that?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, mmm... yeah, I think it, I think it was... over 1100. But that's to the best of my recollection. [[Lie|I swear]].
 '''Kacey:''' So you had something over 1100, but you went to a community college. I mean, did- did you even try to get into a university? Not that I'm saying community colleges are bad, but, come on.
 '''Chris:''' I did- well, yeah, my mom and dad advised me to go ''to'' the community college, because my family could not afford university.
 '''Kacey:''' That's... my- okay, okay, first off... you're on [[Monthly tugboat|disability]]. Government would have paid for your schooling, the end. That's just being lazy. Um, number two, financial aid and student loans. That would have been all on you, not on them. And the thing is, you... should at ''least'' have transferred to university ''after'' the community college cause community college is a stepping stone. Yes, it's a great way to get your classes for cheaper, but then you ''have'' to go to university to get, like, a bachelor's. I mean, did you even look into that?
 '''Chris:''' That had not come to mind. By the way, I ca- by the way, just to let you know, I did check with my mom and dad, I mean... yes, they were in for the financial aid, but they...
 '''Kacey:''' Well then your parents should have done something about that, that just shows your parents didn't care about your future either. But it's not up to them. You should have done it, why didn't you use it? ''[talking over Chris]'' I wish I'd had financial aid right way.
 '''Chris:''' ''[sighs]'' Look. I would have taken the financial aid if I-if I could, but my mom and dad, there was a whole lot of stress going on in just starting out at the community college... 
 '''Kacey:''' But you still... should have been able to do it later... ''[Chris stutters]'' Don't you overtalk me! Don't overtalk me. That's the thing, it's always stress, it's always stress this stress that. It...doesn't...''matter''. You should have been able to do something ''afterwards''. Even if you didn't do it right away, you should have been able to go to a four-year university afterwards, and gotten something better than just a little [[CADD]] certificate...whatever. An associate's doesn't do ''shit.'' I'm... I mean, like, I'm sick and tired of hearing you use the word "stress." You don't know stress. We've been through this before. You ''don't know'' what stress is.
 '''Chris:''' Okay, I will not disagree with you...but on the...
 '''Kacey:''' You're damn ''straight'' you're not gonna disagree with me because you know I'm right! You don't have a job, you don't even- you don't have job stress. You sit around, play video games, and get... ''money''. If your life was a hundred times more stressful than it is now, you still wouldn't have as much stress as I do, you wouldn't have as much stress as...my ''[[Chandler cats|cat]]'', probably.
 '''Chris:''' ''[long pause]'' Yeah, you're probably right.
 '''Kacey:''' You're damn straight I'm right! I mean, you take days off where you don't do anything except color or play video games. I mean, I don't think you get... that all you have shown me the whole time I've known you, is that you don't want to do anything unless it's easy. You want everything to be handed ''to'' you. And in case you haven't noticed, I'm kind of ambitious. Why would I want someone like that?
 '''Chris:''' ''[long pause]'' Yeah, you're right. I would not want, uh... I would, if I was to... go out with a woman, I would want one who was a go-getter. And you...
 '''Kacey:''' But the thing is, don't you think go-getters want ''other'' go-getters? Why would I want someone who's just gonna lay at home and suck up my money? I mean, cause that's all it would be, instead of sucking up the government's money you'd be sucking up my money. And, uh, I'm not sure I'd like that. At all. I mean, I don't want to have to take care of someone until I have kids, and you're ''definitely'' not my kid.
 '''Chris:''' ''[long pause]'' I could definitely, be able- I can definitely take care of myself.
 '''Kacey:''' No you can't! You don't have a job. Can't take care of yourself without a job. My job is hanging on a thread, and I'm still doing way better than you.
 '''Chris:''' Okay, yeah, you're doing... way better than me. You know a lot more than I do.
 '''Kacey:''' I mean, seriously, tell me: without your parents, could you survive?
 '''Chris:''' I would do my best to survive, and... I think I would get by.
 '''Kacey:''' Really. Your best. Because, I mean... what kind of bills do you think need to be paid off every month?
 '''Chris:''' ''[long pause]'' Yeah... electric, water, heating... that sort of thing.
 '''Kacey:''' Um, how about car insurance? Um, cable? 
 '''Chris:''' Oh yeah, car, um...
 '''Kacey:''' Rent? Property? You got taxes? Um, rash pickup if you have trash? Recycling if you have recycling? Oh, and don't forget any repairs.
 '''Chris:''' Yes, there is all that.
 '''Kacey:''' I mean, how much do you get a month again? Like, what, 600?
 '''Chris:''' No, I'm ge- I'm getting... about 800 a month right now.
 '''Kacey:''' Still, my bills are slightly larger than that. I mean, you couldn't survive on your own. And, I mean, these are my bills with ''roommates.'' I don't think you could survive without your parents. You can't even move out! And even if you could move out, you wouldn't have anybody to move out ''with''! That's, that's insane!
 '''Chris:''' Yes, that is insane. And I...
 '''Kacey:''' Then why haven't you done something about it?! I have been living out on my own since I was eighteen, nineteen. You are twenty-seven! And you haven't moved out yet!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, well one reason is- yeah, I don't have anybody to move out... with.
 '''Kacey:''' I moved out with ''nothing.'' I moved out with no job, hardly any money, without a car, and I still survived. And I got myself a job, and I got myself a car.
 '''Chris:''' 
 '''Kacey:''' 
 '''Chris:''' 
 '''Kacey:''' 
 '''Chris:''' 
 '''Kacey:''' 
 '''Chris:''' 
 '''Kacey:''' 

== Part 3 ==
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey, Part 3
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|u2D74OGq_jQ}}
| Stardate = 10 [[November 2009]]
| Featuring = [[Chris]], [[Kacey]]
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]] Saga
| previous = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey#Part 2|Part 2]]
| next = [[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey|Final]]
}}

{{FanChats}}

{{succession|label=Kacey Phone Calls|prevlink=[[Kacey and Liquid Call]]|nextlink=[[Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey|Final]]}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

Chris Chan gets chewed out by Kacey

2011-02-27T02:22:04Z

Pyram1dhead:

Gal pal

2011-02-14T01:08:47Z

Pyram1dhead: /* List of Gal-Pals */

[[Image:0487-CWC18th18.jpg|thumb|right|200 px|Chris's gal pals at his [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday party]]. From left to right: [[Sarah Hammer]], [[Kellie Andes]], [[Sarah Anne Bevel]], [[Miranda Joyce Mitchell]], Friend Brought Along, [[Tiffany Gowen]].]]

A '''gal pal''' or '''gal-pal''' is [[Christian Weston Chandler|Christian's]] [[CWC-isms|CWC-ism]] for a female friend who is a TRUE and HONEST [[sweetheart]]. Chris claims to have had a lot of these in [[Manchester_High_School|high school]]. He has also claimed that [[Megan]] said she loved him, so we know his grip on [[Chris and reality|reality]] isn't very strong.

==Chris and gal-pals==
Chris opted for gal-pals in lieu of having male friends due to the belief that hanging out with other males would turn him [[homos|gay]] and that they're all [[JERKS|jerks]] anyway. Because Chris blatantly refused to socialize with other males like himself throughout his school years, he has adopted rather feminine traits and mannerisms (Such as assuming the cowgirl sexual position during the sex tape video, or having a collection of [[My Little Pony|My Little Ponies]]), ignorant to the fact that what might be acceptable for the females would be considered taboo for guys.

In typical Chris style, he has managed to drive every single gal-pal away. Chris believes that due to all his "Gal Pals" he had his pick of the girls to make his [[sweetheart]] and that he missed out on the opportunities during [[high school]], oblivious that these girls probably associated with him due to pity rather than desiring a real friendship with Chris.

It is also interesting to note that he never refers to girls as "friends", only "gal-pals". Usually, this phrase is used by women when talking about their social clique. Only [[gay]] men ever refer to female friends as "gal-pals", and even then, they're usually joking. Men talking about female companions will just say "friend", or "a girl who happens to be my friend" as opposed to a "girlfriend", because in English colloquy, the latter is implying a romantic relationship. The fact that Chris never thinks of girls around him as "friends" and repeatedly calls them "gal-pals" (which he probably thinks is cute, him being "one of the girls") reasserts his [[women's rights|sexism]]. He doesn't see the women in his life as equals and companions, like a normal human being would; he sees them as possible [[china]].

==List of Gal-Pals==
* [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]]
* [[Virginia Sanford]]
* [[Laura Beth Dorazio]]
* [[Kellie Lyn Andes]]
* [[Tiffany Nicole Gowen]]
* [[Anna McLerran]]
* [[Megan Schroeder]]
* [[Sarah Jackson]]
* [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie]]
* [[Ivy O'Neil]]
* [[Kacey Devoria]]
* [[The Wallflower]]
* [[Mic]]

==Other Gal-Pals==
===Tiffany Robinson===
'''Tiffany Robinson''' was a friend of Chris in the days that he lived in [[Richmond]]. She was Chris's first crush. In Chris's words ''"we would hang out now and then during school hours and play. Then in the 4th Grade, she dumped me for some other boy. I do not know much of what she has been up to these days."''

===Natasha Turner===
'''Natasha Turner''' was a friend of Chris's who he met at [[Providence Middle School]], and who was slightly older than him. He felt very fond of her, and they were next-door neighbors for a while, often hanging out at the bus stop near their homes.

===Sarah Anne Bevel===
[[File:0484-CWC18th15.jpg|thumb|'''Sarah Anne Bevel''' (in red, on the left) and '''Miranda Joyce Mitchell''' (in black, next to her).]]
'''Sarah Anne Bevel''' was Chris's classmate at [[Manchester High]]. She had a sweetheart there, named Brian Smart. Chris recalls hearing that they broke up somewhere in the [[2000s]].

===Molly Quarles===
'''Molly Quarles''' was a cheerleader (the same year as Laura Beth Dorazio) during Chris's Freshman Year. She shared a few classes with Chris. Chris recalls being matched up in a "dating match-up thing" they had every Valentines Day at Manchester High. According to Chris it was ''"the ONLY match-up I felt was a good match-up at all back then."''

===Miranda Joyce Mitchell===
'''Miranda Joyce Mitchell''' was a girl with whom Chris shared a few classes. According to Chris, she was ''"a big brain of my Circle of Friends."'' Miranda helped out Chris in his early website creating days by redesigning the [[CWC's PokéSite 2!]] Logo.

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:0309-CWCNote5.jpg|Gal Pals 1
Image:0310-CWCNote6.jpg|Gal Pals 2
Image:0311-CWCNote7.jpg|Gal Pals 3
</gallery></center>

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Gal pals]]
[[Category:CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Lists]]

Autism Tutorial Part 5

2011-02-14T01:07:32Z

Pyram1dhead:

'''Autism Tutorial Part 5'''

[[Chris]] demonstrates how to "properly" introduce an [[autistic]] person to a new friend, but all it really does is ascertain that his only motivation for socializing with other people, is that doing so theoretically heightens his chances of getting that [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up]] his [[duck]] so desperately hungers for. He then reenacts, yet again, an assault of [[Clyde Cash]].
==Video==

<Center>{{#ev:youtube|uvPZbDwYGjE}}</Center>

===Transcript===

''(Rather than a voice-over, the first segment of the video is a text-only conversation between sack-Chris and several sack-imaginary girls.)''

Un-named Sack-Imaginary Girl: Nonette, this is [[Christian Chandler]], but you may call him Chris. Chris, this here is [[Mic|Nonette Sehen]].

Sack-Chris: Hey Nonette, you are a pretty woman, and I am happy to meet you.

Nonette: ''(clearly needs glasses)'' Well, I think you have a very good face, and I am delighted to meet you too.

''(Chris's melodic voice takes over narration for the remainder of the video)''

Now ''this'' is what I'm talking about for us autistic people. We are too shy by default! But on earning our trust, or if we feel comfortable or like the other person on our indid-ividual instincts, we will open up. And to start us right, we need either: A) The other person to approach and talk to us, upon their own will, or B) have our own trusted friend or family introduce us to other people of our respective ages.

In this scenario, it was a great match for me, for A) she is a [[Boyfriend-free girl|single woman, without a boyfriend]]: B) she is pretty, and easy on my eyes. And C) this woman I could feel comfortable with, and feel a good and honest aura from her. From this a good friendship, and hopefully a f- a long relationship will stay between us for the long time. (Voice deepens with hatred) Do not bring me down here, naysayers and [[Trolls|haters]].

Lets look at a few other scenarios of similar to opposite results. Obviously, most women: ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' Easy on my eyes, good-humored, sweet, pretty... [[Niggo|black]], white, [[Punchy|Asian]], Christian, [[Michael Snyder|Jewish]], Buddhism, I have no, c- I have no care about skin color or religion, whatever. I will be kind to all of them, respectful and welcoming them, to have them in my circle of friends. Lesbians, too... Just don't get on my bad side here. ''[Subitle: "To clarify, the 'Don't get on my bad side' part refers to All Women in general'"]''

Men, my own... ''kind'', on the other hand, I would feel most hesitant towards. Because I have had fewer male friends in my life, and I have had mostly bad experiences around them. ''Plus'', and this is very important, in my autism test it was found that I get along better with women, well over ''men''. ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' And considering my life experiences and my own opinion, I totally agree with that. If the, uh, individual, however, offers a, uh, friendly gesture, and does not make me [[Chris and anger|angry]] or make me feel most uncomfortable, or ill at ease, I will be willing to give him a chance and welcome him as a friend, and nothing more. ''[Subtitle: "**PLATONICALLY Friendly**"]''

However, going back to the mean people of the internet... Upon meeting one of them in real life - and I will be able to recognize them sure enough, at least with basic instincts - I will not hold back my endured rage. Just ask this crying [[Clyde]]. ''(A scene of a livid Sack-Chris smacking Sack-Clyde follows before the narration continues.)''

Physically and [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally challenged]] individuals will vary more. Good results upon if they are easy to look at, if they are able to speak clearly, even ''slooowly'', that I can easily understand them. ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' And now, uh, the other part, the other side, whoa, back off! I'm spooked if you are ugly, seriously disfigured, especially in the face, that you [[Chris and English|mumble more than you speak]], you're [[Speech impediment|hard to understand]] at all. It is nothing personal, and I apologize for anyone who feels an unease after hearing what I just said, but its just the way I feel. That's all.

{{succession|label=[[Autism Tutorial|Autism Tutorial Videos]]|prevlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 4]]|nextlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 6]]|}}

Autism Tutorial Part 4

2011-02-14T01:07:06Z

Pyram1dhead: /* Transcript */

'''Autism Tutorial Part 4'''

[[Chris]] describes [[Charlottesville]], and how it should be what he wants to replace the [[internet]]: "a social hotspring." However, Chris being Chris, he doesn't seem to understand why people avoid him in public, and blames some moral deficiency present in everyone else. Chris tries to demonstrate how [[Attraction Sign|socializing]] with him should work (SPOILER: everyone else does the work). He again demands respect, in what must be another ineffectual attempt to restore his reputation.

==Video==

<Center>{{#ev:youtube|qZXJ1SO0w58}}</Center>

===Transcript===

''(Chris's voice is trembling with obvious [[stress]] throughout the entirety of the presentation)''

Only about ten miles south of [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]], [[Virginia]], is ''[[Charlottesville]]'' Virginia, historic home town of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_Jefferson Mr. Thomas Jefferson], [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Phinney_Munroe Mr. James Munroe], and [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Madison Mr. James Madison]. Lewis and Clark also started their famous expedition from this area.

The expensive [[mall]] of downtown Charlottesville houses a number of [[The GAMe PLACe|small businesses]], as well as the show-stopping pavilion tent and the Paramount Theatre. This, as well as the Fashion Square Shopping Centre, should ''both'' be social watering holes, but for me, sadly, ''they are not.''

Anywhere herein, even including the bars and events like [[Fridays After Five]], nobody will even look or say hello to me. And of course the internet reputation I have against me... sadly thanks to those gross people that have taken my information... and... ''s-s-strew it around'' in their [[Lies|misconceptions of weirdness, twisting everything.]] I've already gotten into how bad that has half-fected me and how emotionally scarred I have a been. Back to social life, the [[autism]] increases my shyness, so I ''hardly'' have even the basic instinct to just say "hello" to anyone, or even open up so easily with trust. I need other people to come up and talk to me fir- (Abrupt jump-cut)

Allow me to make it perfectly clear about who I am so I am not misunderstood erroneously with the internet that's against me: My name is [[Christian Weston Chandler]], high-functioning autistic [[Chris and art|artist]]. I am [[Chris and anger|kind]], [[Chris and remorse|caring]], [[Chris and death|empathetic]], [[Stress|emotional]], a [[Chris and his Ego|good friend]], a ''loyal'' friend, cautious and weary, ''trustworthy''. Mostly [[Honest Content|honest]]. I do not like to [[Lies|lie]]. I would only lie to protect the other person's feelings out of care and respect. [[Ryan Cash|I]] [[Mike Jackson|AM]] [[Homos|NOT]] [[Megan|A]] [[Kacey|MONSTER]]! I am a caring, emotional, feeling, [[Homos|heterosexual]] human being! And [[Chris and Hypocrisy|I should be treated equally]], and respected as SUCH!

([[stress]]-[[sigh]]) Sadly back here in real life, everyone is in their ''[[CWCville|own dang world]]''. Snobbish, snooty... to even give care to ''one person'' who only has [[Trolls|few friends]] within the city, uh- that is Mr. Jefferson's hometown. Not even as much acquaintances, I feel invisible in public, and it's very sad to me. (stress-sigh) At least I do have [[Mic|one friend]] who cares about me around here. Unfortunately she refuses to go beyond [[Friend Zone|just friends]], but I care about her just the same anyway, because that is the kind of guy I am.

''(The sackpeople stare at each other like retards for the remaining few seconds of video)''

{{succession|label=[[Autism Tutorial|Autism Tutorial Videos]]|prevlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 3]]|nextlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 5]]|}}

Autism Tutorial Part 6

2011-02-14T00:35:31Z

Pyram1dhead:

'''Autism Tutorial Part 6'''

The sixth entry introduces [[Mic]], who might be the new [[Wallflower]]. [[Chris]] proves that he's not satisfied with friendship. This devolves into a rant that echoes an earlier sentiment that Chris wants a cure for [[autism]]. The video ends with him finally returning the dance to [[Tiffany Gowen]] he expected to give her last year, via a [[LittleBigPlanet]] cutscene. Despite thousands of levels of free dancing sackboys to steal, Chris awkwardly (and possibly realistically) portrays the dance with one controller for almost a minute and a half. The level doesn't end properly, proving Chris's [[Fail|mastery]] of LittleBigPlanet's editing software.

==Video==

<Center>{{#ev:youtube|xga0M-h1tIE}}</Center>

===Transcript===

At this point, you would think I would be hap- a happier [[autistic]] person, right? Finally having the wom- the woman of my life to be here by my side, and care about each other and such for the rest of our lives? ([[stress]]-[[sigh]]) But, the truth is, for real... [[Mic]] and I, we don't hang out in person as much as we should be. Only phone conversations, and the few times we did hang out. And she does not know that many people here in [[Charlottesville]]. All things appreciated in our friendship... Mic is just ''too busy'' to help me best. (stress-sigh)

''(A text message appears reading "I'm sorry, Mic. You did what you could, and I always will appreciate it all. Good work, and thank you, friend.)''

Another thing about us autistic people, we do not like to be [[Chris|alone]] quote-unquote twenty-four-seven. We need the emotional support of a [[Gal-Pal|true friend]] constantly and in person. Also on another note, apparently [[Monthly Tugboat|government funding]] goes more towards physical health over [[Slow-in-the-minds|mental health]]. The brain is a part of our body, and not just any part, the most vital part! Why do we treat the rest of our body parts, which essentially ''alone'' are [[Chris|brainless]], better than our one actual central processing unit that is not brainless? As a part of the body, funds should be equally distributed, or equally divided, between both [[Duck|physical]] AND [[Autism|mental]] health. So that the cures for mental illnesses, including autism, can be found!

It just makes me feel sad and furious at this time. I for one [[Lies|actually appreciate]] a true and full good quality friendship. Yet in a world full of [[Chris|sick-minded]] people one can only detest, I feel so [[Stress|paranoid]] of a number of [[Trolls|people]]! And I feel uncertain of most anyone I could ever trust, an- or feel at ease around! The social [[Homos|phobias]], I can no longer [[Chris and Religion|tolerate]]. Which is why, unlike the autistic people, who pitifully accept it as a forever-lasting curse, I for one seek a cure! On the day a resolution to re-establishing all connections in our brains, with thorough corpus callosum repair, and such, I, Christian Weston Chandler will be there among the first in line to take the life-changing autism cure I have desired for soo long! To establish a quicker, more socially-active mind, a great sense of self-esteem, a great sense of self-reliance, a great sense of self-confidence, total independence, and freedom from the thorns of autism of any kind or sssort!

...The life... only an autistic person can ever dream of. I am Christian Weston Chandler, and this has been an autism tutorial. Thank you, and have a good and safe day.

''(A text-only section follows as Sack-Chris fondles and [[Rape|gropes]] a poor defenseless Sack-Tiffany, who struggles in vain to free herself from Sack-Chris's clutches.)''

A little Extra for the Real Tiff, who Graduated with me from Manchester High's Class of 2000. Among all of my Gal-friends, she understood me the most. I really, truly would love a chance to hang out with her and talk and whatever. It really would mean a lot to me. If you are watching this, Tiff, I miss you a lot: Please, come and hang out with me for a while.

{{succession|label=[[Autism Tutorial|Autism Tutorial Videos]]|prevlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 5]]|nextlink=[[Autism Tutorial Extra]]|}}

Autism Tutorial Part 5

2011-02-14T00:03:24Z

Pyram1dhead: /* Transcript */

'''Autism Tutorial Part 5'''

[[Chris]] demonstrates how to "properly" introduce an [[autistic]] person to a new friend, but all it really does is ascertain that his only motivation for socializing with other people, is that doing so theoretically heightens his chances of getting that [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up]] his [[duck]] so desperately hungers for. He then reenacts, yet again, an assault of [[Clyde Cash]].
==Video==

<Center>{{#ev:youtube|uvPZbDwYGjE}}</Center>

===Transcript===

''(Rather than a voice-over, the first segment of the video is a text-only conversation between sack-Chris and several sack-imaginary girls.)''

Un-named Sack-Imaginary Girl: Nonette, this is [[Christian Chandler]], but you may call him Chris. Chris, this here is Nonette Sehen.

Sack-Chris: Hey Nonette, you are a pretty woman, and I am happy to meet you.

Nonette: ''(clearly needs glasses)'' Well, I think you have a very good face, and I am delighted to meet you too.

''(Chris's melodic voice takes over narration for the remainder of the video)''

Now ''this'' is what I'm talking about for us autistic people. We are too shy by default! But on earning our trust, or if we feel comfortable or like the other person on our indid-ividual instincts, we will open up. And to start us right, we need either: A) The other person to approach and talk to us, upon their own will, or B) have our own trusted friend or family introduce us to other people of our respective ages.

In this scenario, it was a great match for me, for A) she is a [[Boyfriend-free girl|single woman, without a boyfriend]]: B) she is pretty, and easy on my eyes. And C) this woman I could feel comfortable with, and feel a good and honest aura from her. From this a good friendship, and hopefully a f- a long relationship will stay between us for the long time. (Voice deepens with hatred) Do not bring me down here, naysayers and [[Trolls|haters]].

Lets look at a few other scenarios of similar to opposite results. Obviously, most women: ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' Easy on my eyes, good-humored, sweet, pretty... [[Niggo|black]], white, [[Punchy|Asian]], Christian, [[Michael Snyder|Jewish]], Buddhism, I have no, c- I have no care about skin color or religion, whatever. I will be kind to all of them, respectful and welcoming them, to have them in my circle of friends. Lesbians, too... Just don't get on my bad side here. ''[Subitle: "To clarify, the 'Don't get on my bad side' part refers to All Women in general'"]''

Men, my own... ''kind'', on the other hand, I would feel most hesitant towards. Because I have had fewer male friends in my life, and I have had mostly bad experiences around them. ''Plus'', and this is very important, in my autism test it was found that I get along better with women, well over ''men''. ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' And considering my life experiences and my own opinion, I totally agree with that. If the, uh, individual, however, offers a, uh, friendly gesture, and does not make me [[Chris and anger|angry]] or make me feel most uncomfortable, or ill at ease, I will be willing to give him a chance and welcome him as a friend, and nothing more. ''[Subtitle: "**PLATONICALLY Friendly**"]''

However, going back to the mean people of the internet... Upon meeting one of them in real life - and I will be able to recognize them sure enough, at least with basic instincts - I will not hold back my endured rage. Just ask this crying [[Clyde]]. ''(A scene of a livid Sack-Chris smacking Sack-Clyde follows before the narration continues.)''

Physically and [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally challenged]] individuals will vary more. Good results upon if they are easy to look at, if they are able to speak clearly, even ''slooowly'', that I can easily understand them. ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' And now, uh, the other part, the other side, whoa, back off! I'm spooked if you are ugly, seriously disfigured, especially in the face, that you [[Chris and English|mumble more than you speak]], you're [[Speech impediment|hard to understand]] at all. It is nothing personal, and I apologize for anyone who feels an unease after hearing what I just said, but its just the way I feel. That's all.

{{succession|label=[[Autism Tutorial|Autism Tutorial Videos]]|prevlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 4]]|nextlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 6]]|}}

Toucher and Rich Segment

2011-02-11T09:35:49Z

Pyram1dhead: /* Transcript */

[[Image:BaronHarkonnen.jpg|thumb|Chris in "the David Lynch movie of your nightmares."]]

[[Chris]]'s 1 [[May 2009]] videos [[For My Sweetest Ivy]] was the focus of a segment of '''''[[Wikipedia:The Toucher and Rich Show|The Toucher and Rich Show]]''''', a Boston-area radio show, that aired on 12 [[May 2009]]. This is one of the rare discussions of Chris in the mainstream and not by [[trolls|obsessives]] on the Internet. There are some details that the hosts of the show get wrong, like the apparent confusion of [[Ivy]] with [[Megan]], but this is understandable given that their knowledge of him is mostly second-hand.

Notice that no matter how much the hosts try to warp Chris's voice, the original is still the most disturbing.

==The video==
<center>{{#ev:youtube|NU5uMZU2CP0}}</center>
<center>{{#ev:youtube|e5a7HN0pa0w}}</center>

==Transcript==
'''Toucher:''' Sometimes you don't realize how big something's getting on the internet. We are Toucher and Rich -- Rich Shertenlieb, Crash Clark, Adolfo Gonzalez. My name is Fred Toettcher. Two ways to get involved with the show. Please feel free to instant feedback -- go to WBCN.com and click on "Instant Feedback," or give us a call at 617-931-1041. Here is the deal: we got sent a e-mail from a guy who said, "Look at, this is the most disturbing thing I've seen in a really long time. What the F is up with this guy?" And he was the guy, do you have "I Got A Fish?"

'''Rich:''' I got it right here, yeah. [''Plays clip from "[[I Got A Fish]]:"'']

:'''Chris:''' I got a fish! Would ya like to make a wish? I got a fish! Would ya like to make a wish? I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish? 

'''Toucher:''' And he is a grown man who is standing in a [[Chris's room|room full of toys]], and he is saying things, uh, this is him describing, do you have the description of what he likes, the spanking, he's kind of describing--

'''Rich:''' Oh no, I don't have that. Do, do some of it.

'''Toucher:''' Yeah, basically he's describing how he likes, uh, there's [[April 16 Fetish Vids|pictures of him]] that have been leaked on the internet wearing [[Butt garments|adult diapers]], uh, he likes being spanked, and that's because [[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009|that's what adults do]]. Adults like feeling pleasure, uh, out of pain.

'''Rich:''' Right.

'''Toucher:''' Yeah, he is a disturbing young man. And I've been sent since then a bunch of links about this guy. And you know what, I don't remember his name and I don't care to; you'll be able to find him, don't worry about it. [''Laughs''] But, uh, he's got a million videos up on the internet, and he also apparently has a comic book that he draws and puts up on the internet--

'''Rich:''' Oh boy.

'''Toucher:''' --which is, I don't even want to get into, but which I, which I, from what I, if what I read is true, it's [[Sonichu 10|horribly disturbing]]. So anyway, he's kind of this manchild, he, uh, wears glasses, he looks a little bit like, for lack of a better description, [[Wikipedia:Phillip Seymour Hoffman|Phillip Seymour Hoffman]], almost? Like if he was playing a deranged guy. [''Laughs'']

'''Rich:''' [''Laughs.''] Right.

'''Toucher:''' Alright. So anyway, so from what I've read, there's a whole big, like, there's something that's, uh, that's like Wipi-Wikipedia, but it's like "[[ED|Crapipedia]]" or something? [''Rich laughs.''] There's this big page about this guy, and I don't know if it's true or not, but they reference that [[JERKS|he hates all men]] because they, uh, have all the girls, all the girls he meets have girlfriends[sic], but there was one girl that he was friends with, that he fell madly in love with, and I guess that this is a, uh, an ode to her.

'''Rich:''' It is. Now, in this video, unlike in the other one where he's just sitting down wearing his, like, flannel shirt, like, looking at the camera, he is standing up, he's extremely excited, you can tell because he's kind of bobbling from side to side, and he's wearing his normal outfit except on top of it a blazer. 'Cause he wants to look proper.

'''Toucher:''' And he is nonchalantly holding his, uh, remote control. He always has a video game remote control on him. And once again, in his bedroom, with the toys and drawings and the cartoons.

'''Rich:''' And here you go.

'''Toucher:''' He's obsessed with [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], too, from what I've read. And if I failed to mention it yet, he's probably close to forty. [''Plays clip from "[[For My Sweetest Ivy]]"'']

:'''Chris:''' Hey Ivy! I'm doing this video for yoooou. Oh, we are gonna have so much fun together when you and I are together! Hmmm!

'''Toucher:''' Yeah right, dude! [''Rich laughs.''] Dude, dude, dude, enjoy, put the Nightmare Machine on, ladies and gentlemen. [''Plays a clip from "[[Wikipedia:Goodbye Horses|Goodbye Horses]]," alluding to the Buffalo Bill dance scene in'' [[Wikipedia:The Silence of the Lambs|The Silence of the Lambs]].] I hope that you're not half-asleep with the snooze button listening to this guy, 'cause, welcome to the [[Wikipedia:David Lynch|David Lynch]] movie of your nightmares!

'''Rich:''' If I saw this in a David Lynch movie, I would say, like, "Alright, David Lynch is trying way too hard. Now he's like, making up stuff, that, this is too weird." [''Continues clip'']

:'''Chris:''' You know, [[Barbara|my mommy]] and I--my, my family and I will come and meet you at the airport. And you know, your choice so--take you to your hotel or, uh, bring you back to...my house, hmmm.

'''Toucher:''' Ooh. These little-- [''Replays and imitates Chris's whimper and laughs, then plays the "Goodbye Horses" clip again, adding Chris saying "Back to... my house" and "My mommy and I" with his voice digitally lowered.'']

'''Rich(?):''' "My mommy and me..." [''Plays stinger music'']

'''Toucher:''' Even when adult women say "mommy" it's freaky--

'''Rich:''' [''Laughing''] I know.

'''Toucher:''' --let alone an adult man talking to somebody he, uh, obviously wants a relationship with. Ai-yai-yai. I hope you've had that cup of coffee, ladies and gentlemen, because [''Laughs''] it only gets worse. [''Continues clip.'']

:'''Chris:''' I mean, uh, you know, we'd be hanging around so much and sharing so many fondful memories. Hmm. And you know, I few--I know a few good places in [[Charlottesville]], you know, I think it's, you know, I'll take you there, we'll get some good things to eeeeeat, and we’ll hang ooouut. We’ll have so much fun. I know a place that serves some great smoothies. And you know, we can enjoy a movie in the theater, or in--at home, or watch a television rerun. ''[[Family Guy]]''! Heh.

'''Toucher:''' "''Family Guy''!" [''They laugh and play the stinger music again.''] Tony, you're on Toucher and Rich.

'''Tony:''' Oh my God, two hundred years ago, this guy would have been ostracized out of a village or a town or something like that. [''Toucher and Rich laugh.''] I mean, he ''really'' needs to be around normal humans.

'''Toucher:''' Yeah, I guess there are videos, I've been told, where [[Christian Weston Chandler Interview|his ''mother'' appears]], like--

'''Rich:''' No!

'''Toucher:''' --comes into the room while he's filming 'em.

'''Rich:''' Oh man.

'''Toucher:''' Yeah, I mean, there's a, you could spend a good, uh, horrifying evening, [''Rich laughs''] if you wanted to go, like, out to the old haunted house and play these things, you could probably do it for a couple of hours. [''Continues clip'']

:'''Chris:''' ''Family Guy''! Or, uh, ''[[I Love Lucy]]'', or I got some—I got the entire series of ''[[Gilligan's Island]]'', hmmm. Hoo-hoo! Hmm, and we can make some music together on ''[[Guitar Hero]]''. Hmmm. Well, you can sing, I got a microphone. I'm thinking about getting drums. [''Makes a drum sound.''] Hm, yeah. And you know, I will see you in the--I look forward to the eventuality of, uh, you and me having our sex time together.

'''Toucher:''' Aaaauugghhaaaaoooo! [''Plays clip of "Goodbye Horses" again''] I'm going to guess it never happened. [''Rich laughs.''] I'm going to guess that the lady saw this video and maybe thought-- [''Replays clip of Chris saying, "I look forward to the eventuality of, uh, you and me having our sex time together."'']

'''Rich:''' Oough.

'''Toucher:''' Alan, you're on Toucher and Rich.

'''Alan:''' Hey, guys, hey!

'''Toucher and Rich:''' Hey!

'''Alan:''' Um, make sure you save that videotape; the FBI will want it for evidence.

'''Toucher:''' I have a feeling that, if all this is real, that, uh, there are [[Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens_(message_board)|several]] [[CWCki|organizations]] that are just keeping an eye on the, uh, the doings of this gentleman.

'''Rich:''' Yeah, the creepiest thing is that he, first of all, he talks like a little kid, like, "my mommy," and then in his first video, he was saying, because that's what adults do sometimes, like he's talking and addressing children.

'''Toucher:''' But I g--, this woman is an adult from what I've read, that he's addressing.

'''Rich:''' Oh, oh, maybe, maybe it is, maybe it is, but the other videos that he's made, it just seems like--

'''Toucher:''' He's very child-like and maybe he was relating to someone on a child-like level.

'''Rich:''' Right.

'''Toucher:''' That is a, that is an assumption. [''Continues clip'']

:'''Chris:''' Hmmm, I'll do you so many, I'll, I'll do my best to pleasure you and keep you satisfied, my sweetest Ivy, just for you. Just for you! Hmmm! 

[''Rich laughs.'']

'''Toucher:''' Who did you save all this skin for? [''Plays clip of "Goodbye Horses" again, adding Chris saying "Just for you!" three times, with the first iteration digitally lowered.''] Why is this dog-cage all set up? [''Repeats digitally-lowered "Just for you!" and adds the "I look forward to the eventuality of, uh, you and me having our sex time together."'']

'''Toucher:''' I mean, you don't even have to play it slow, you don't have to do anything, this is like a night-- I've never gone through the whole video, it's, it's so disturbing to me. [''Continues clip'']

:'''Chris:''' I know a number of good positions and massages, hmm. Hmmm. And, you know, I know a number, uh, places we could walk around at, you know. We could walk about the mall!

'''Toucher:''' Ooh!

:'''Chris:''' We could walk about the UVA grounds! Good places where there's plenty of green and sunlight. Hmmmm, so, you know, wonderful memories! Wonderful memories! We're gonna have lots of fun. And I promise, I’ll remain your good boy forever and for always. Being a good boy just for you, Ivy. [''Sound of disgust from one of the hosts''] I love you so much, I love you so muuuuch! Hmmmm.

'''Toucher:''' Oulbggh!

'''Rich:''' [''Laughs''] Oh yeah!

'''Crash:''' It's making chills!

'''Rich:''' [''Laughs''] I know!

'''Crash:''' The chil-- he's a witch! [''Replays a slowed-down "Being a good boy just for you, Ivy. I love you so much, I love you so muuuuch!" and adds "Just for you!" and a slowed-down "Look at me smile" at the end.'']

'''Toucher:''' [''Laughing''] "Look at me smile!" [''Replays "I know a number of good positions and massages."''] Ohhhh. [''Continues clip'']

:'''Chris:''' Hmmm, look at me smile, hmm. It's a nice smile. Because I love you, Ivy! I love you so much. I ran out of details. I don't know. I guess I'll sing you a song.

'''Toucher:''' No!

:'''Chris:''' It's a jolly ‘oliday With Ivy Ivy makes my heart so light When the skies are grey And ordinary Ivy makes the sun shine bright. It's a jolly holiday with Ivy No wonder that it's Ivy that I love. I love you so much Ivy. I love you! I love youuu. [''Blows a kiss to the camera.''] Talk to you later, sweetheart. And also to your father the policeman, I salute him with my Cub Scout salute.

'''Toucher:''' Ohhhhhhh ohh. [''Rich laughs.''] [''Plays circus music to "I look forward to the eventuality of, uh, you and me having our sex time together," "Oh, we are gonna have so much fun together when you and I are together!" and "Just for you!"'']

'''Toucher:''' I'm just hoping that they wouldn't let this guy on an airplane. Laura, you're on Toucher and Rich.

'''Laura:''' Thanks a lot for making me have a new really colorful character for my nightmares. [''Toucher and Rich laugh.'']

'''Toucher:''' E-especially for a woman.

'''Laura:''' I'm just gonna sleep with the light on for the rest of my life, now.

'''Toucher:''' Yes, indeed!

'''Laura:''' Oh my God!

'''Toucher:''' We should make a, we should make tapes of these specifically for certain people, just replace "Ivy" with "Laura"-- [''Replays "We can make some music together on ''Guitar Hero''" and "And I promise, I’ll remain your good boy forever and for always." while everyone laughs.'']

'''Toucher:''' Well, Rich is obviously from a conservative Catholic family and, uh, something happened over the weekend that maybe made them think he was a little bit of a psycho.

[''Segment ends.'']

==Chris's Response==
Troll goddess [[Vivian Gee]] saw fit to inform Chris about his radio presence via e-mail. Needless to say, Chris was less than receptive.
{{Email|<nowiki>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5a7HN0pa0w&feature=related</nowiki>

This was part of a radio show from a few months ago. It resurfaced recently and I had a listen.

If you wonder why this applies to you: skip to 7:00.

A woman comments about how YOU will be part of her nightmares now.

This is what normal people, not trolls, think of you. If you really think it's just trolls who have formed a bad opinion of you, think again. Just letting you know.}}
{{EmailReply|Well, I never asked for a reputation.‏

This WHOLE WORLD is becoming autistic by gluing ALL of their attention
to computers, [[internet]] and all that. I am a REAL LIFE MAN, and while I
do not appreciate or care much of the "reputation" that has been made
against me on the crappy internet, the TRUE Reputation I would call my
own is in REAL LIFE and from ACTUALLY HANGING OUT WITH ME IN PERSON.

Feel Free to Spread this Quote from me, "If you REALLY want to make a
Reputation Of Me, then Hang Out With Me In Real Life. Quit hiding
behind your F***ing Computers and "[[4-cent_garbage.com|Anonymous]]" Bu**S***."

Nobody is Perfect. But I AM a Good Person, and I do not have to be
recorded to prove it.

Peace,
Christian.}}

Needless to say, the quote Chris manufactured for himself wasn't spread.

==See also==

[[The Kevin and Bean Show Segment]]

==External links==
*[http://www.wbcn.com/topic/play_window.php?audioType=Episode&audioId=3705145 Listen to the broadcast]

[[Category:Media that has been published in real life]]

Trollin Train

2011-02-08T21:12:41Z

Pyram1dhead: /* Hey, guys (Sun 22 Aug 2010) */

'''Trollin Train''' was a fake [[troll]] forum, established on 27 [[July 2010]], which Chris frequented under the trollsona "[[JenkinsJinkies]]." He eventually gave up on posting, afraid that when [[jerkops]] "busted" the forum they would mistake him for a [[troll]].

Trollin Train is an excellent example of both Chris's [[Naive|naïveté]] and his [[ego]]. His JenkinsJinkies persona was instantly recognized by the trolls due to his narrow grasp of [[Chris and English|the English language]], and taken advantage of from the start. Furthermore, his arrogance led him to believe that all of the trolls had immediately fallen for his ruse and that a fourteen-year-old sodomist who had moved in ''directly'' across the street from Chris would fit in perfectly with the secret trolling circle (because in [[Chris and Reality|Chris's mind]], all trolls are really angsty gay children and not regular people with jobs and girlfriends who troll Chris in their spare time for fun). Needless to say, the JenkinsJinkies [[Manboobs|teat]] was milked for all it was worth and Chris went along without ever realizing it.

==Chris's Posts==
===Hey, Everyone! J.J. has arrived. (Thu 29 July 2010 12:19 AM)===
A new thread in which Chris introduces himself:
{{quoteboxred|First, let me say I am most humbled to be welcomed among my fellow Troll Kind. [[File:Smiley smug.gif]]

Well, let me tell a bit more about myself for starters. My real name is [[Junior Jenkins]] (Scooby-Doo was the inspiration behind the "Jinkies"). LOL. I had a [[birthday]] recently on the 16th of July, so now I'm 15. I couldn't celebrate it with my friends like I would have wanted to, because I was hitchhiking my way to [[Ruckersville]] from Boston. I'm crashing at a house where I have some relatives there (They're the fucking Black Sheep of the family, and they're not close within the same house. It is cool, because they won't rat me out to my parents and siblings. Like I need another damn minute with those assholes who overlook me). And a better part, their house is across the street from [[14 Branchland Court|Chrissy's house]]. Sadly, though, the blinds to [[Chris's room|his bedroom]] are always closed, but I still get some sights of him and the family out of their house.

I've arrived at my new home a few days ago on the 20th. I'll be spending my Sophmore year and so on in Greene County's High School. I promised I'd write to my gal back in Boston, but what happens here she doesn't have to know. [[File:Emot-dong.gif]] I'll have to make some new friends come September, but I'll be cool; I'm a stud!

I'll also miss my favorite duo of dudes, Jerry and Dino. They taught me the ropes of high school life; they both were 16. I looked up to them (like I would have for [[Carol Chandler|my older sister]] if she wasn't such a fuckin' cunt). They were a [[Homos|gay]] couple, and they respected me as a friend only. I made it my Final Realization I was not gay with the help of Jerry and my [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]], Lisa. Sweet little whore took me in with gratitude on my 14th birthday. She had a few exes from [[Middle School]], and her mom was a Bondage Queen.

Before then, I had a gay experience in Summer Camp when I was 7. My bunkmates were experimenting, and made me their mo-fo unwilling guinea pig. I was blindfolded during the whole thing, feeling an 8-year old's [[pickle|dick]] up my ass. I was not thrilled from the ordeal. But [[January 2010|last January]], I became curious from the recalling of the feeling, so I asked Jerry to show me a night. At first it was neutral, then he made out with me; his breath was minty with a hint of garlic from something he ate; it was cool with me. Then he told me to suck his dick, and I did; the taste and sight did not thrill me. And he sucked [[Duck|mine]]. He got a rise out of me, but then I started to feel uneasy. It was minor at first, and I promised myself I'd see this through. Finally, he was in me doggy style. As he humped me, I was feeling it both in my penis, and in my gut; worsening as he went on. And eventually, I embarrassed myself grossly. I came AND fucking threw up simultaneously. Jerry had not come yet himself, and out of respect, he withdrew himself and asked me if I was okay. He cleaned me, and my mess on his floor up. I felt soo damn ashamed, but Jerry was kind and understanding to me. And it was then I confirmed it for myself that I was not gay, and Jerry and Dino agreed with me. So with that, I was able to move forward feeling more confident in my orientation. [[File:Emot-spergin.png]]

Anyway, after moving here, I have studied the times of exits and entries from the Chandler Chateau, looking for a pattern. There was definitely one with [[Bob|Robert]], morning for breakfast at [[Burger King|B.K.]] and afternoon outings to I.D.K. where. [[Barbara]] appears to come out mostly either in the afternoon or night; sometimes in the mornings. And Chris has no set pattern as far as I can tell yet.

But I'll post new stuff as I learn them, some with (hopefully embarrassing) photographs of Chris as I learn and take.

Smell ya later,
Junior Jenkins "Jinkies".|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=579&highlight=#579]</ref>}}

===Hey, guys (Sun 22 Aug 2010)===
Another new thread. Parts of this message were very clearly dictated to Chris by [[Bob]]. In it, Chris makes the absurd assumption that the trolls are animal abusers, and was snapped at by the trolls in response.
{{quoteboxred|I've been keeping watch over Christian's house for any consistent patterns or LULZy details. I had seen none, even when I went over there while no one was at home. Although, I did mess up the [[cats]] a bit by stepping on their paws; the scratches and bites were worth it. All of the doors were locked (big surprise). Their garden was a big jungle (only half my height, though; about 2 feet high max). I found no incriminating evidence in their garbage.

But recently, I made a call to their house and pretended to be a fan of [[Sonichu]]. Bob was bored I guess, and he talked to me. After mentioning the Trolls, Bob said to me, "Sissies that hide behind screen names and the [[internet]] are the biggest bunch of cowards and the scum of the earth. They are afraid to come out one-on-one, face-to-face. [[Hooker incident|They would hide behind their mothers' skirts.]]" Then he directed to one of our own he found out somehow, "Females are the worst; such as Miranda "Enjoy The Big [[Pickle]]" Cosgrove." That surprised me greatly, but in defensefor you, Miranda, Bob would be of no match against you.

Then Bobby said, "Meet me in person at [[Burger King]] in [[Ruckersville]] Any Day between 9:30 & 10:30 AM, and I will talk to you and your friends and answer your questions. Christian and I are not afraid and have nothing to hide. We are [[Slow-in-the-minds|simple]] and above bored." We chatted some more and then he hung up.

I'd say let's troll Bobby further to get to Chrissy. I went there this morning; he was civil and gave me some info on Chris, such as that he has a complete collection of [[Wikipedia:50 State quarters|the United State Quarters]] on a Map (What a dumb way to save [[money]]). He also calls Chris a good boy (I agree with him; he ain't grown up). And, ooh, this is a good one; Chris tried to roller skate, and fell multiple times, even though he did a lot better on Ice Skates at the Ice Park (a class he took at [[PVCCitizens]]).

I'm sure the more of us that go to Bobby and talk to him, the more information we can get out of him about Chrissy for our schemes.

I'll continue to keep watch and let y'all know when something new and lulzy comes up.

Junior Jenkins.|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=953&highlight=#953]</ref>}}

=== Damn! (Wed 25 Aug 2010 5:42 AM)===
In response to a thread announcing that Chris had discovered Trollin Train:
{{quoteboxred|Chris found this Forum?!!! I agree with you, Miranda, what if Chris doesn't download our virus at all; he's reading our plans, he may just boycott downloading ANYTHING new from [[ModNation Racers|ModNation]] or [[LittleBigPlanet|LittleFuckPlanet]]. And even IF [[Sony]] doesn't read what he wrote, they are aware of our shit as well. I tell ya, he ain't hiding, he's snitchin' on us for the fuckin' "good" of every lazy fuck on the PSN. Anti-Viruses can be put into any next Update now.

Plus, Chris may come out of hiding and make a video to put the close on our fuckin' repeated death rumor. And I have noticed something else, with my Laptop, I managed to use a bit of his Wi-Fi (it goes all around his yard). It Disappears Nightly, and sometimes Daily. He's Unplugging his Internet, keeping us out.

[[File:Emot-frogsiren.gif]]

I have to hand it to him, he makes it Frustrating to Troll Him. It's like we have to PAY AirFare or HitchHike Dangerously and do it Old-Fashioned with Accordian Cameras and shit like that.|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1011&highlight=#1011]</ref>}}

The "virus" he mentions was in reference to a thread in which trolls claimed to be putting viruses into ''LBP'' and ''ModNation'' DLC that Chris would be likely to download.

===That plan is NO GOOD (Wed 25 Aug 2010 5:48 AM)===
In response to a thread about digging up Patti:
{{quoteboxred|I personally took a closer look at [[Patti]]'s grave; it is Harder to break in than [[Wikipedia:United States Bullion Depository|fort fuckin' knox]]. the body is buried deep underground with Cement Blocks covering the site, and her [[Father Call|HEAVY Dog House]] is on top of those Cement Blocks. I wouldn't be surprised if they Cemented her grave as well. Also, the site is Heavily Surrounded by Trees and Heavy Branches; it's like Deepest in the Mine Shaft with Cave-Ins happening all the time.|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1012&highlight=#1012]</ref>}}

=== Nah, dude (Thu 26 Aug 2010 4:55 AM)===
In response to a thread about getting [[The Bear]] to call Chris "Mr. Poopy Head" so that Chris would have to rename himself to "Mr. Poopy
Head Weston Chandler". The post was likely made in the wrong thread, as it appears to be a response to [http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?t=83 Christian Weston Chandler: 1982 - 2010]
{{quoteboxred|Do you really think he's that retarded? To perform a Repeated Act is fucktarded. Like we ALL know he is alive; I am watching him, his family and his house daily; it is POINTLESS and Redickulous to remake the Rumor of his death. We should Not Repeat performances, because he will be Expecting them and Knowing very well to ignore the Trite Fucktardedness.|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1062&highlight=#1062]</ref>}}

=== Hey, the Equipment and the Digging (Thu 26 Aug 2010 5:12 AM)===
In response to the same thread about digging up Patti:
{{quoteboxred|It's all no good; the neighborhood is Very Often Quiet. The noise will be heard by someone, if not the Damndler family; someone would call the [[Jerkops|Police]] on us for sure. Besides which, I was Haunted by the spirit of the dog AND the child Monday Night.

I went over to Chris's house with a flashlight that Night. I'm trekking through the daylilly garden aisles, searching for more bad I can do about the house. When suddenly, I hears a voice, "Hello". I look around and see nobody. I am Terrified. Then suddenly, I am fucking paralyzed; my ankles and wrists are pulled to my left and right, feeling like there were other people's hands holding them down on a floor, and I feel a pair of hands on my Neck too;
strangling me, yet I can still breathe. Then the voice comes back, "Hello, Mr. [[Troll]]." It is the voice of a child, about 8 years old. I struggle to look around, yet I see nobody. I'm fuckin' shittin' my pants here. The voice continues, "Do not be afraid of me, like the teachers of the [[Elementary School]] were; they did not understand me and my mind. I want you to understand my mind..." Right after, I see a lot of strange images going through my mind. Including the images of an [[Abusive babysitter|abusive babysitter called "Roache"]] locking me alone in a static room; a therapy session at [[James Madison University]]; the teachers, guidance counsoler and principal of [[Nathanel Greene Elementary School]] holding me down and taping my screams and more. I tried to scream, but Nothing came out; it was a Scream of Silence; I could not even utter a WORD in Normal Voice; Only Silence.

Next thing I knows, I am knocked back onto the cement block trail of the garden aisle, by the weight of a big dog, yet there was no dog. Wrists, Ankles and Neck still being hand-held, the child ghost leaves my mind, and then I hear a deep womanly voice, Growling at me as I smelled the stench of a dog's breath surrounding my nostrils. The voice says, "Do not mess with my master, my family or me, you infidel!" Next, I feel the sting of [[Patti|the dog]] biting into both of my ankles, one after the other. At that moment, I struggle back, leaving behind the lit flashlight I dropped earlier when my arms were
being stretched out. And I limp as fast as I can back to my house, closing and locking the door behind me, gasping for breath and dripping with sweat. I limp to the bathroom with the shower and look in the mirror; what a gross mess I looked like. And I see a Big, Red Rash on the right side of my neck, and rashes on both of my wrists, from the hands that held them in place. And my pant legs were ripped, and he saw on both of my ankles rashes, and Teeth Marks of a Dog. I tried to scream again, but it was another silent scream. And I was unable to speak at all for Four Hours.

I have encountered the Spirits of Young Christopher Weston Chandler and [[Patti]], protecting the Chandler Household. I warn you all right here and now, Stay Away from his house, and Patti's Grave. It is NOT worth it to have to suffer the Nightmare that can render you as damned silent as the [[Autistic]] child. And Patti is definitely not friendly to our dark kind.

[[List of Chris's lies|I tell you only the truth, my friends.]]|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1068&highlight=#1068]</ref>}}

=== Dudes, you are not gonna believe this. (Sun 29 Aug 2010 1:22 PM)===
Another new thread, posted as a part of Chris's half-baked plot to get over nine thousand dollars for destroying his PS3:
{{quoteboxred|Even I could not believe it, but I was an Eye-Witness to Chris Smashing his own [[PSTriple]]. I had just gotten home from an outing with my family, when at about 4:00 on the afternoon of this Saturday the 28th, I saw Chris walk outside of his house with his Camera in one hand, a pair of workers gloves in his back pocket, and his PS3 in the other hand. I was curious, so I followed him to his backyard, where I watched from behind the gazebo. Thank God I was not seen by him. Yet Fuck Me for forgetting MY Camera.

Anyway, he had taken a busted Air Conditioner from his Junk Pile, placed his console onto it, placed the tripod to one side and detached the camera from it to get a close up of his fat face. I don't remember his shitty speech fully, but it was some stuff of finding peace within himself and was about to destroy the "vessel?" which held his "lonely, anguished self" from the past three years. Then he reattached the camera to the tripod, relocated it for a closer view, walked in front of it, put on the gloves, picked up the nearby brick and started WAILING on it. I was just all Shocked, I could barely move and believe my eyes. He was smashing the thing like asteroids at fucking Armageddon. He looked like he was not going to stop. But after a minute, he put down the brick, took off his gloves and turned the camera off. Also, he had removed the Removable cover with his decals on it; said he was keeping it as a momento or something. And he walked back to the house, carrying his camera and the pieces of his own Smashed PSTriple.

I would have posted sooner, but I was paralyzed with shock for hours; it was Horrifying to me. And later at about near 10:45 that night, I watched from the window of my room as he laid the smashed PS3 on his gravel driveway, and recorded Driving Over it with both of his Left Tires, about 4 or 5 times! My Shock continued more.

I finally recovered about a couple of hours ago, ate a Hungry Man Dinner; I could not eat at all since the first smashing. Then I remembered that I should really be posting this, so here I am.

OMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMGMG...|Chris<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1186&highlight=#1186]</ref>}}
{{The Internet}}
==Sauces==
<references/>
==External links==
*[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/ Trollin Train]
[[Category:Historical Documents]]

JenkinsJinkies

2011-02-02T05:54:31Z

Pyram1dhead:

'''Junior Jenkins''', alias '''JenkinsJinkies''' (born c. [[1996]]) was Chris's [[Disguises|trollsona]] from [[May 2010|May]] to [[August 2010]].

==CWCki==
[[image:Fatjenkins.jpg|thumb|The great JenkinsJinkies]]
JenkinsJinkies began as another [[CWCki]] account, made by Chris to confirm that the antenna he had removed from his [[PS3]] wasn't a bug in [[PS3/How the PS3 is Hacked]], a bait page made by [[Clyde]]. It was quickly discovered that JenkinsJinkies was Chris, and [[Trollin Train|appropriate action]] was taken soon afterwards. Clyde contacted Chris through JenkinsJinkies' [[User talk:JenkinsJinkies|talk page]], and it resulted in a short correspondence between the two.

{{quote|I lost my young virginity with a Seinor [[Kellie Andes|Cheerleader]]; her [[china]] was sweeeeettt! Plus, as an [[ED|Anon]], I prefer to keep my add off of the web. I would not want Chris coming after my ass. The mindfuck that he is, I would not want to fall victim of one of his impulsive manchild rampages. I just enjoy getting the [[Laughs Under Lucricities|LULZ]] off of him.|JenkinsJinkies, the 14 year old [[homos|sodomite]] who had gay sex at the age of 7 and lost his [[virgin|virginity]] to a High School student beforehand. Who also lives directly [[14 Branchland Ct.|across the street]] from Chris.}}

Chris believed playing a troll who was [[Chris and Reality|legitimately]] afraid of Chris's wrath would totally convince [[Clyde Cash]] himself that he was legit. He also unsuccessfully tried to scare the trolls into thinking he was plotting to hunt them down, one by one. Several [[/cwc/|lesser]] trolls believed they were the first ones to realize that JenkinsJinkies was Chris, and blew the whistle every now and again, but such leaks were uncommon and generally most trolls played along.

==Trollin Train==

As the trolls began to tug on JenkinsJinkies's marionette strings, a [[Trollin Train|trolling forum]] entirely dedicated to making Chris paranoid was established. Despite all posts, members and threads being only a few days old, Chris was [[Naive|completely convinced]] that it was the official trolling hub, where all the nefarious plots made against him were conceived.

As if it weren't obvious enough that Junior Jenkins was Chris, he also went out of his way to praise Chris for his ingenious schemes for halting the trolls wicked plans and/or dissuade the trolls from even trying - often combining the two themes into the same post.

{{quote|I have to hand it to him, he makes it Frustrating to Troll Him. It's like we have to PAY AirFare or HitchHike Dangerously and do it Old-Fashioned with Accordian Cameras and shit like that.|JuniorJenkins, [[#Damn! (Wed 25 Aug 2010 5:42 am)|Trollin Train]].}}

Junior Jenkins also had run-ins with the ghosts of [[Patti Chandler]] and seven year old Christopher Chandler as Chris inexplicably believed that trolls would be frightened by these events. They were not, and Jenkins was roundly mocked.

==PS3 Destruction==

The most infamous event of Trolling Train took place when [[Surfshack Tito]] offered US$9,001 for Chris's [[PS3]] to be smashed. Due to a misinterpretation of Tito's criteria, Chris thought he could get the reward if ''he'' did the smashing and simply had Junior claim to witness it. The rest [[PS3#Destruction|is history]].

Though Chris [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|did not]] receive the $9,001, he [[Monthly tugboat|somehow]] replaced his PS3 within four days.

==See also==
*[[Trollin Train]]
*[[JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV]]
*[[Disguises]]

{{stub}}
[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Chris's alter egos]]

2012

2011-01-26T08:53:06Z

Pyram1dhead:

Things <s>planned</s> that will happen in '''2012''':

[[Image:FutureChris.jpg|thumb|[[Chris]] in 2012]]
[[Image:The toppling of Christian.jpg|thumb|'''February 24:''' Two years after the proclamation of [[Christian Love Day]], the citizens of [[CWCville]] revolt against their tyrant, undoing all the damage done in his "crusade of [[Honest Content|honesty]]"]]
[[Image:Sonichuspore1.png|thumb|"ALL Sonichus are [[Homos|STRAIGHT]]!"]]
* '''SPOILER ALERT:''' Chris still [[virgin with rage|won't have a girlfriend]]
*[[Scampers Chandler|Scampers]] runs away. ''(go go Scampers! :3)''
*[[Bob Chandler]] finally kicks the bucket. He then goes on to successfully [[Bob Walks In|cut down the]] [[Internet]] in Heaven.
*''[[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles]]'' & ''[[Sonichu (game)|Sonichu the Game]]'' are released as [[Hex Bawx|Kinect]] exclusive titles, earning Chris millions and mad [[lie|poon]], but at the compromise of his beliefs. Chris later sues Microsoft to cease publication of his game and port it to [[Wii]] and [[PS3]]. He loses the lawsuit and is ordered to repay all of the revenue he made from his games.
*Hasbro, in cooperation with [[The Miscreants]], releases a board game based off CWC's life, dubbed "[[Kick the Autistic]]" which quickly becomes America's favorite game.
*Having made millions of dollars from their famous game, [[Clyde Cash]] is able to bring his organization back into the public. He then enlists the help of [[Jack Thaddeus]] and [[User:Cogsdev|Webmaster Cogsdev]] to construct a network of proxy A.I.s to run all future organized trolling from then on out. Clyde is then allowed to retire in peace, knowing [[Ryan Cash|his brother's]] will has been carried on...
*With her cat and husband gone and her son a total failure, [[Barbara Chandler]] attempts suicide, but due to her extreme size she is unable to kill herself and she expires in a mound of fecal matter.
*Chris goes to the [[Charlottesville]] [[Mal-Wart]] armed with an [[IBA Chandler]] sniper rifle. In a fit of tard [[rage]], he fires at several [[manager]]s and [[boyfriend-free girl|girlfriend un-free boys]], missing every time.
*Chris is sentenced to six months house arrest for his failed rampage. He starts storming [[YouTube]] with meaningless [[PSEye]] videos again and tries to convince women to come to his house.
*Chris is released from house arrest, and soon proceeds to run over two people with [[Son-Chu]] while pretending his car is a <s>[[Transformers|Transformer]]</s> [[Metal Gear|walking battle tank]].
*For his crime, Chris is sentenced to two years in prison. He struggles to STAY STRAIGHT, but is raped by [[niggos]] daily.
*Chris is let off after one month for good behavior, and is instead sentenced to house arrest, yet again...
*Virginian [[police]] discover the corpse of a [[Zapina|14-year-old girl]] who had been [[rape]]d several miles from [[14 Branchland Court]]. Numerous signs of trauma to her [[vagina]], traces of [[semen]] and [[Fanta]] are found on the corpse, and [[Medallion|pieces of Crayola model magic]] are found [[Julie Reveals Herself|shoved up her anus]]. However, the chemicals in the Fanta completely destroyed any DNA, hindering the investigation. Decorated officer [[Bagget|Marcus Baggett]] is put in charge of the investigation, and personally swears to bring the perpetrator to justice.
*Chris kidnaps, rapes and murders nearly every single one of his past [[gal pal]]s and then attempts to create the "[[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up]]" by stitching together their various body parts and tries to reanimate them using the Anchuent powers of his [[Amnyfest Ring]], the [[Heart Torch of Fail]], and his [[PS3]]. None of the methods work.
*Chris proceeds to instead stick the Heart Torch of Fail up his ass and creates Crystal, who later dies 5 seconds after seeing her father. Chris then rapes her corpse.
*After removing said object from his ass, he finds out at least 15 [[Pixelblocks]] are trapped in his ass. He is hospitalized for a week.
*[[Patti-Chan]] is resurrected by Maya shamans in preparation of the 13th baktun: the end has begun.
*Chris's carelessness after the kidnapping spree finally gives the Virginian state police the evidence to go after him. After a lengthy car chase in Son-Chu down the interstate, the police finally corner him at a [[McDonald's]], forcing Chris to make a last stand. As Chris steps out of the car, brandishing a vintage [[Megatron Pistol|WWII German pistol]], Officer Bagget orders Chris to put the gun down. Chris replies "[[random-access humor|Down where? All that's down there is the ground]]" and starts charging a [[curse ye ha me ha]] attack. Police are forced to open fire. Footage of Chris being gunned down is broadcast live across the country, resulting in Bagget's promotion to police commissioner.
*Barbara's corpse is discovered during a search on their house, half-eaten by [[Kitty]] and a zombie-esque Patti.
*Chris, lying in the hospital and dying of his wounds, feels shame for the first time in his life, causing him to collapse into a singularity of self-loathing.
*The CWC Saga is declared over, and heroic [[trolls]] everywhere retire in peace to live happy successful lives. The [[CWCki]] is left up as a monument to Christian's [[fail]].
*Chris's body is sent off to NASA, who, after extensive research, discover that Chris's rectum contained an environment so volatile that it spawned the first recorded traces of [[PS3|Silicon-Based Life.]]
*''Chris-Chan: An Autistic Odyssey'' is picked up by Warner Bros and quickly becomes the most popular horror film of all time (starring Philip Seymour Hoffman as Chris, Clint Eastwood as Bob, Kathy Bates as Barbara, Ulliel Gaspard as [[Liquid]], Emma Watson as [[Kacey]], Brad Garrett as [[Father Call|Matthew Devoria]], Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino as [[Clyde Cash]], Ken Leung as [[Mao]], Jason Scott Lee as [[Surfshack Tito]], Ashley Tisdale as [[Sarah Hammer]], Ellen Page as [[Megan]], Javier Bardem as [[Joshua Martinez]], Samuel L. Jackson as [[Jerkhief]], Tom Baker as [[Michael Snyder]], Dame Judi Dench as [[Mary Lee Walsh]], Jim Cummings as the voice of a CGI [[Count Graduon]], Lucy Liu as [[Vivian Gee]], with Bruce Willis as [[Cole Smithey]] and Jaleel White as the voice of Sonichu and Rosechu). Cole tarnishes the film by giving it the only negative review.
*On December 21st, Patti returns from beyond the grave to feast on the souls of all humanity. In two brief hours, most of the planet is reduced to cinders, and from the ashes of devastation, a new world order, aided by [[Clyde Cash]] and the TRUE and HONEST [[Liquid_Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]], will arise, and civilization will enter into a new golden era.
<gallery>
Image:SchuRL.jpg|[[Sonichu]] in 2012.
Image:Rosechu.jpg|[[Rosechu]] in 2012.
Image:Alenci.jpg|[[Angelica Rosechu]] in 2012.
Image:Simonl.jpg|What [[Simonla Rosechu]] could have looked like in 2012.
</gallery>

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

2010

2011-01-01T22:25:00Z

Pyram1dhead:

[[File:WantWoman.jpg|thumb|[[Chris]] in [[2010]].]]

'''2010''' marks the second consecutive year of organized trolling of [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. In 2010, Chris turned 28.
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = The Chris Chan 2010 Year in Review
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ugFEQ9gYmq0}}
| stardate = 28 [[December 2010]]
| maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/MiHiVidz MiHiVidz]
| subject = [[Chris]]
| type = Compilation
}}

==January==
{{main|January 2010}}
[[Image:EloquentArgument.JPG|thumb|left|On 17 January, Chris expresses his opinion on ''[[Asperchu/Background|Asperchu]]''.]]

Smug with overconfidence thanks to his [[Mailbag|fanmail]] and the victory over [[gay]] ads, Chris charged into January, not even allowing the shut down of the [[CWCipedia]] via [[copyright]] claims stop him. However, Chris would soon find a new [[stress]] factor in the emerging fan comic ''[[Asperchu]]'', going to great lengths to pull his fans away from it via various crazy [[YouTube]] videos; every attempt failed miserably. As he did, Chris continued to update [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], revealing more of his madness. Unbeknown to trolls, he was actually beginning to get close to [[The Wallflower|another girl]] and he would attempt to hide this, but his own [[ego]] would refuse to let him do so.

==February==
{{main|February 2010}}
[[File:Evan'sDeath.JPG|thumb|On '''25 February''', Chris murders [[Evan]] and the rest of the [[Asperpedia]] Four in brutal and disgusting ways.]]

As January became February, Chris found himself embroiled in a series of phone calls from ''[[Asperchu]]'' creator Alec Benson Leary, where Alec demanded that Chris promise to be more tolerant of ''Asperchu'' and to get rid of [[Simonla Rosechu]], with [[Mao]] holding the [[CWCipedia]] hostage. Though Chris gradually recovered enough from the stress to complete ''Sonichu'' #10, which showed the death of Simonla, Chris then had [[Alec]], [[Mao]] and two other people killed within the same comic as an act of childish retaliation. Chris recovered just in time for his birthday, producing a shameless display of self-praising by declaring the first annual [[Christian Love Day]]. Perhaps the biggest mystery revealed this month was the sudden appearance of [[Magical Man Potion|another human male]] entering Chris's [[room]], one of the more puzzling developments to come out of Chris for some time.

==March==
{{main|March 2010}}
[[File:Owllevel.jpg|thumb|left|On '''9 March''', Chris uploads a new ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' level that would inadvertendly reveal the identity of [[The Wallflower]].]]

As March began, trolls showed concern over news that Chris's father, [[Bob]], had been hospitalized with congestive heart failure. Sadly, Chris showed no concern whatsoever, angering his [[fanbase]]. A few days later, Chris would, through his massive [[ego|narcissism]], reveal a name of his potential new [[sweetheart]] through a custom ''[[Little Big Planet|LBP]]'' level. Dedicated trolls would discover [[The Wallflower|her identity]], and one faggot would cause the [[gal-pal]] to cut ties with Chris and Chris himself discovering the [[CWCki]]. At that point, Chris began an all-out war against the [[Internet]], attacking his [[fans]] for wanting more ''Sonichu'' pages, attacking the CWCki, and especially attacking [[Surfshack Tito]], the troll who took credit for destroying the [[lulz]]. However, [[Rocky Shoemaker|an outside source]] would intervene, forcing Chris to once again announce he was leaving the Internet forever. (36 hours after making this bold and bombastic claim, Chris returned with a new video to complain about [[TV]] and [[sex]].)

==April==
{{main|April 2010}}
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|On '''5 April''', Chris's second [[The Hook Cafe]] ad is discovered.]]

As April started, Chris's activity on the Internet was sporadic. However, trolls soon discovered an ad on [[The Hook Cafe]], discovering that Chris was back to his [[Love Quest]] on the Internet. During this time, Chris would meet and begin talking to a woman named [[Jackie]], who would become Chris's focus throughout the month. Having learned something from the previous incidents, Chris kept a low profile on her, which however did not prevent some highly-disturbing material to eventually leak to general public. During this time, he attempted to return to [[The GAMe PLACe]] in an attempt to lift his ban; the trolls hailed [[Michael Snyder]] as a hero when he kicked the anti-Semitic manchild out again. Chris would also work on CWCipedia a bit more, creating profiles for his characters and a page about all of his past sweethearts.

==May==
{{main|May 2010}}
[[File:MODNATION_2.JPG|thumb|left|On '''May 26''', Chris begs for ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' bonuses.]]

As May started, it seemed that things were going to be slow again, with a relative high point of smug Chris boasting that he had removed a "bug" allegedly planted by trolls in the [[PS3|life upgrade]]. However, he soon became severely depressed and blamed his problems of rejection by everyone on a conspiracy conceived against him by the [[Greene County]] School Board. By the end of the month, Mao opened up the [[CWCipedia]] to everyone. Chris attempted to revert their vandalism, but soon gave into stress and abandoned the website. Two series of [[e-mails]] are also leaked.

==June==
{{main|June 2010}}
[[File:GrayScaleChris.jpg|thumb|On '''30 June''', Chris looks for [[love]] on [[Flipnote Hatena]].]]

After Chris's fourth threat to leave the Internet, many fully expected that he would not keep to his word. The silence was however broken after Chris traveled to The GAMe PLACe with an autistic plan of revenge against Michael Snyder; long story short, Chris almost committed [[Son-Chu|vehicular]] homicide while [[Alcohol|drunk]] and was let off scot-free by the [[police]]. He then made a video addressing these events, and announced that he would be leaving the Internet. ([[Chris and hypocrisy|Again]]. [[Youtube Finale|For]] [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|the]] [[100 2188|fifth]] [[100 2189|time]].) Things fell silent for nearly two weeks, until a field agent spotted Chris at the [[Fridays After Five]] event in [[Charlottesville]], continuing his [[Love Quest]] offline by acting [[pedofork|really creepy]] in public. Soon, trolls also discovered where Chris had disappeared to online: the [[Flipnote Hatena]], a website created by [[Nintendo]] for users to share their amateur animations.

==July==
{{main|July 2010}}
[[Image:FAF-06092010.jpg|thumb|left|On '''9 July''', Chris continues stalking girls at [[Fridays After Five]].]]

July 2010 was another very quiet month. It began with Chris getting [[List_of places that have banned Chris|permabanned]] from [[Flipnote Hatena]] for constantly breaking the site's rules. For a time after that he emerged from the internets to enjoy the fruits of real life... by reverting back to the ancient ways of the [[attraction sign]]. He was spotted once at [[McIntire Park]] and twice at [[Fridays After Five]]. However, on 17 July he returned to [[Twitter]], telling [[trolls|his loyal fans]] that he's [[lie|working on the comic pages]]. On 24 July he also evaded his Flipnote Hatena ban and re-posted some of his removed flipnotes, suggesting that he bought another DSi just to use a children's website as his personal dating service.

==August==

{{main|August 2010}}

[[File:PostCar.JPG|thumb|On '''29 August''', the [[life upgrade]] goes GAME OVER, man.]]

During the first half of August, Chris didn't give off any signs of life except for a brief sighting at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]], kicking a stall of [[HEXBox]] games. It was suspected he spent his time playing [[video games]]. However, a phone call to Bob Chandler was released, relieving some new info. He would then return on August 27 to post two videos, one concerning his upcoming high school reunion, and the other where Chris concedes to the trolls after reformatting his PS3, claiming [[fail|he did himself in]]. Two days later, Chris would destroy his PS3, and there was much rejoicing.

==September==

{{main|September 2010}}

[[File:Niggocwc.jpg|thumb|left|On '''16 September''', Chris dressed as a [[niggo]].]]

Early in September, e-mail correspondence was leaked that provided some background on the destruction of the [[Ps3|life upgrade]]. Quite predictably, Chris purchased another PS3 almost immediately. [[Jackie]] officially returned as a new [[sweetheart]] in Chris's life, with him trying to impress through new videos on YouTube, including attacks at Jackie's ex-boyfriend, Lars. Also this month, a bunch of ancient documents dating back from 2008 and 2009 were released to the public by [[Clyde Cash]], followed by some more from early 2010, including [[Wallflower_E-mails|correspondence between Chris and The Wallflower]]. Towards the end of the month, Chris officially kicked off his "anti-troll movement".

==October==

{{main|October 2010}}

[[File:Grimace.jpg|thumb|On '''4 October''', Chris [[cosplay]]s as [[McDonalds|the Grimace.]]]]

October began with Chris acting just as crazy as in September. He made another half-assed apology to Michael Snyder and then proceeded to start dressing up in a large variety of [[cosplay|costumes]] made out of construction paper, which dominated the first half of the month. He also made two scary and confusing videos in which he gave birth to a baby [[bear]], used his manboobs for a breast cancer awareness ad, and more. Some of the videos were actually shot outside of the [[room]] or even the [[house]] altogether, featuring Chris driving his mom's car and even going for a "hike". The conflict with Lars also continued, however on seemingly low-level. October 2010 is notable of sheer number of [[videos]] that were released by Chris, including more than a dozen a day twice, making it by far the most active month so far (albeit quality of them varied a lot). In the meantime, Clyde kept releasing even more previously unseen historical documents.

==November==
{{main|November 2010}}

[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|left|On '''6 November''', a video of Chris struggling to do pull-ups was leaked.]]

November turned out to be a slow month. Chris had a call with Lars and a video of him failing to do pull-ups was leaked the same day. Chris would then go quiet for two weeks, until he quit the Internet for the 6th time on 22 November and deleting most of his other [[YouTube]] videos in the progress.

==December==
{{main|December 2010}}

December began under the shadow of Chris's sixth attempt to leave the Internet in favor of playing [[vidya]] all the time. The final batch of e-mails between Chris and Jackie were released. As usual, Chris did not get [[All I Want For Christmas Is a Pretty Girlfriend| a girlfriend for Christmas]], for the sixth time since [[2004]].

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]