CWCki - User contributions [en]

User talk:Death To The Impostor

2011-05-10T05:02:35Z

Raku: /* So, are you? */ new section

{{welcome|Freecell}}

Please read the rules before you contribute, etc. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 00:52, 3 March 2011 (PST)

== So, are you? ==

Are you THE [[Christian Weston Chandler]]?

Seriously, you have some suspicious looking activities going on here...[[User:Raku|Raku]] 22:02, 9 May 2011 (PDT)

User:Raku

2011-05-03T04:14:13Z

Raku:

Can not believe he missed all of this, hoping for more humor

<div style="center>
{{Collapsible|Userboxes|
{{Americunt}}
{{White}}
{{Native American}}
{{JERK}}
{{Agnostic}}
{{Straight}}
{{Hex-Box}}
{{PS2}}
{{Wii}}
{{AlecBensonLeary}}
{{JackThaddeus}}
{{LiquidChris}}
{{ClydeCash}}
}}

{{#ev:youtube|N3yLtnNF6yM&autoplay=1&loop=1&start=1" height="1" width="1" fposition="left" frame="false"}}

User:Raku

2011-05-03T04:09:28Z

Raku:

Can not believe he missed all of this, hoping for more humor

<div style="center>
{{Collapsible|Userboxes|
{{Americunt}}
{{White}}
{{Native American}}
{{JERK}}
{{Agnostic}}
{{Straight}}
{{Hex-Box}}
{{PS2}}
{{Wii}}
{{AlecBensonLeary}}
{{JackThaddeus}}
{{LiquidChris}}
{{ClydeCash}}
}}

{{#ev:youtube|BVj8peo1WGo&autoplay=1&loop=1&start=1" height="1" width="1" fposition="left" frame="false"}}

User:Raku

2011-05-03T03:59:09Z

Raku:

Homos

2011-05-01T05:06:13Z

Raku: wanted to direct link to the comment

{{quote|Homo males are objectionable, VERY objectionable (I hate them!)|[[CWC Update 30 January 2009]]}}

'''Homos''' is the pejorative term by which [[Christian Weston Chandler]] refers to '''homosexual people''' almost exclusively.

From the very beginning of his [[Internet]] fame in [[2007]], his extreme opposition to homosexuality and his neurotic, obsessive demand that everyone [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"STAY STRAIGHT"]] have been one of his most noted and exploited aspects.

==Fear of being a homo==
[[Image:0067-Christian&Barbie.jpg|thumb|left|Chris tried to stay straight from an early age, by posing with Barbie.]]
[[Image:CWC new novel.png|thumb|A glimpse into the future?]]
[[Image:What Chris thinks he looks like.png|thumb|Chris shows his [[Rainbow|true colors]].]]

{{quote|"Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."|Chris <ref>E-mail to Megan, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*:; Date: Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm</ref>}}

Chris's homophobia is just that: he is literally afraid of homosexuality and of anything that could conceivably cause a straight person to be "leered off the straight path." His terror is such that he can barely bring himself to even utter the word "gay" or any other term concerning gay people, except of course for "homo". He has said that he cannot even look at a picture of a [[pickle|penis]] without being "freaked out"<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref> and he has cited [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|several techniques]] he believes are necessary to maintain his sexual attraction to women.<ref name="ReferenceA">[[Mailbag 3#Hypnotize away the gay|Mailbag #3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 3#Sexy posters|Mailbag #3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 4#Dissolving homoerotic thoughts in stomach acid|Mailbag #4]]</ref>

Chris is also convinced that chances of homosexuality are raised as a direct result of not engaging in heterosexual intercourse before maturation,<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php/Dating_Education</ref> his [[Dating Education]] classes naturally being the reasonable solution to preventing people from becoming homos. He continues to attempt to wildly assert his straightness (and fail at it), using stuff like the [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail]] to objects as strange and totemic as his [[Optimus Prime]] toy.

==Hatred of homos==
Chris's animosity towards gay people seems to result primarily from his fear of them and their supposed ability/desire to make him gay. He has often characterized the [[trolls]] as homos, which is either a basic ''ad hominem'' attack or a sincere belief that anyone who draws penises on [[Rosechu]] must be gay.

Notably, in [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC chat]] from 2 [[January 2009]], Chris made this statement:

{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "[[Wikipedia:Deck the Halls|Deck the Halls]]"|Chris, 2 January 2009, 11:59}}

[[Image:Bionic2.jpg|thumb|Chris projects his repressed homosexuality onto [[Bionic|one of his own abominations]].]]

He added that gay men should be incarcerated in prisons with female offenders and be provided with access to prostitutes, arguing that they would come out "reprogrammed" into healthy, law-abiding heterosexuals.

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009|February 18, 2009]], Chris issued a retraction of his previous homophobic remarks and declared that he respects "the gay people" like he respects his [[gal pals]] and his [[sweethearts]]. However, this was mostly done at the insistence of [[Julie]]; by [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|10 March 2009]] Chris was reciting verses from the Bible to justify his position against homos.

In Chris's ''Carrie'' ripoff, "[[The High School Story]]", Chris's Mary Sue character, Terrah LeAnne Yowman, is called a lesbian by kids at her high school, because she hangs around with guys all the time.

{{quote|She felt angry when she heard "Lesbian"; when called that, she would leave the bully an intimidating [[The Creepy Stare|glare]] with a purple glow from her green eyes. Then soon after, a [[Christian Weston Chandler|Strong, Straight Homophobe]] would attack that bully with [[Chris and religion|No Mercy]]; beat the crap out of that person.|"[[The High School Story]]"}}

On 14 [[June 2009]], he created a video called ''[[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]'', which in the Chris-chan tradition of ruining everything you ever loved is a homophobic version of [[Wikipedia:Uncle Ruckus|Uncle Ruckus]]'s song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from [[Wikipedia:The Garden Party|the pilot episode]] of ''[[Wikipedia:The Boondocks|The Boondocks]]''.

Later on in the day, he published an apology for the video called ''[[I'm Sorry, Dude]]'', and insisted that he likes gays who "ac— ...accomplish other things, like [[Wikipedia:Stephen Fry|Stephen Fry]], who was a homosexual, but y'know he did a good job being a narrator on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''." This quote, of course, displays Chris's ignorance, as Stephen Fry is also a famous actor, comedian, writer, narrator (on things other than ''LBP''), and author of some extremely witty and charming blogs that have a large Internet following, as well as being an advocate for gay rights. This apology was only posted for the sake of his [[gal pal]] Kim's boyfriend, whose gay brother apparently lost both his arms in Iraq.

Curiously, Chris goes out of his way to state that the children of Sonichu and Rosechu are watched over by [[Heather Iglesias]], whom he characterizes as "a pretty, trustworthy, good natured Spanish Lesbian."<ref name="Cwcipedia: Sonichu">[[Cwcipedia]]: "Sonichu"</ref> He further mentions that Heather keeps her sexuality a secret from the kids at the request of Sonichu himself.<ref name="Cwcipedia: Sonichu"/> It is unknown why Chris mentions this, given that he has vacillated wildly in the past in his feelings on lesbianism, sometimes [[Mumble 1|coming out in support]] and other times [[CWC "Boyfriend"|condemning it]], or why the character is both Hispanic and a lesbian.

Chris occasionally tries to say he respects homosexuals for who they are. However, he repeatedly betrays his intolerance of different lifestyles, often within the same statement.

{{quote|"I personally respect the individual people as fellow human beings, and I am cool with associating with them as acquaintances and friends, but Please Do Not Wave Around what you do behind closed doors around me; NOBODY CARES TO KNOW; I PERSONALLY DO NOT CARE TO KNOW. Even within my imagination, I Do Not Care to even have the pictures Randomly Pop up in my head."|Chris <ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality</ref>}}

Because it's OK for him to wave around his degenerate sexuality and showcase real life pictures of his disgusting activities, but God forbid a well-adjusted male adult mention they love other men.

On 8 July 2009, Chris left a comment on a PSN News Post in reference to a Unity avatar.<ref>http://blog.us.playstation.com/2009/07/08/attention-fighting-fans-prove-youre-the-best-around/#comment-241496</ref>

{{quotebox|Hey, the Street Fighter Tourney is good news, but I have a concern about the person who left the message.

His Avitar…

If that icon is WHAT I THINK IT IS, I AM OFFENDED; please change your Avitar, dude.}}

On [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 26, 2009|July 26, 2009]], Chris goes so far as to call "gay" a synonym for "stupid."

In the [[Mailbag]] section of the [[CWCipedia]], Chris describes at length his idea for his comic self to travel to the future, where scientists have successfully isolated the "homo gene" (an idea stolen from [[Wikipedia:Family Gay|this episode of]] ''[[Family Guy]]''). They have not, however, isolated the "straight gene", and are only able to when Chris donates his own blood (Chris has once remarked that [[Honor roll|homosexuality could be cured by injecting blood from straight men into homosexuals]], or by imprisoning gays in [[Rape|co-ed prisons]]). This storyline finally came to light in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], Chris amended this plan to not only bring back a couple of syringes, but also enough of the "cure" to turn every gay person on Earth straight.

[[Jack Thaddeus]] purchased advertisement space on the [[CWCipedia]] to put up two ads on the site. One of them was an ad featuring Peter Griffin of ''[[Family Guy]]'', pointing out that he and his creator, Seth MacFarlane, were supportive of gay rights. In retaliation, Chris blew his stack, [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|stating]]:

{{quote|I understand you getting paid to run ads in that box on the Cwcipedia. I feel okay with [[Vivian]]'s [[Audiobooks]], BUT I feel OFFENDED with the Mexico Contest and Gay-Rights Ads. The Pickle on the Mexico ad reminds me of a terrible time in my past with Pickle-Suited TROLLS, and '''I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLES and FOR STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUALITY.'''

Please Remove, or Change the Images of, THE TWO ADS.

And in the future, if you plan on adding more advertisements, INCLUDING the associated images, Please run them by me in a message for my personal Approval BEFORE you start running the ads.

Thank you.|Chris<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:WikiSysop#The_New_Ad-Links</ref>}}

In a [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|phone call]] with [[Jack Thaddeus]], Chris stated that he assumed that a friend of Jack's was gay when he heard that he had AIDS.

On Christmas Day, [[2009]], the Sysop at the CWCipedia added a Twitter onto the webpage. Two days later, Chris saw this and flew into a tizzy, wanting the Twitter off as he didn't want any "homo trolls" talking behind his back.

Around New Year [[2010]], Chris replaced Jack Thaddeus's gay-friendly ads with ads for [[wikipedia:Love In Action|Love In Action]] (an "ex-gay" ministry), ProtectMarriage.com (a site promoting [[wikipedia:California Proposition 8 (2008)|Proposition 8]]), and a site that calls for a boycott on Pepsi due to their gay-friendliness. In another ad, he also suggested that [[wikipedia:Avatar (2009 film)|''Avatar'']] was a ''totally'' straight film. To sum it up: Ex-gay campaigns, Proposition 8 and ridiculous consumer boycotts - in one fell swoop, Chris managed to put in three big things that do ''not'' win himself any gay friends whatsoever and prove all of his previous "respect" for gays is nothing but idle words.

On 5 [[January 2010]], Chris responded to a [[Mailbag]] letter addressing the homosexual subject. In the answer, Chris stated that [[Magi-Chan]] keeps a constant psychic-surveillance to ensure that there are no homos in CWCville. When evidence of homosexuality was found in a couple, the people involved would be arrested and fined heavily.

Then, on 7 January, when answering the question of how he began hating the gay population, we got this interesting insight...

{{quote|I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, [[2003]] just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE!|[[Common Questions#Answered 07 January 2010|Chris, before finally stating (for the umpteenth time) that Sonichu is straight.]]}}

Not only is this ironic, considering his current views on lesbianism, but it adds another interesting aspect to his hatred: Chris's frustration with homos is influenced by him being childish and whiny about not getting his way, just because ''one'' woman turned him down. We wouldn't expect anything different from him.

On 12 January, Chris appeared to soften his stance, saying that "Firstly, I am decreeing that homosexuals will have equal relationship rights within [[Cwcville]], yet gay marriage is still Illegal and Wrong. And [[Magi-Chan]] will stay out of those people's heads under my request."<ref>[[CWC Blog#12 January 2010]]</ref> Of course, it's not clear how gays can have "equal relationship rights" if they can't marry, but Chris tends to be pretty weak on logic.

On 30 [[January 2010]], Chris voiced his opinion about the ban on homosexuals serving openly in the American military. He is for the lifting of the ban so that "[[Mailbag 49#Chris loves his country|the homos can go die in explosions]]."

On 15 [[August 2010]], [[Bob]] showed the same kind of hatred and prejudice as his son does for "DA HOMOS". In the [[Matthew Noble call]], Bob said that he believed that a few homosexual kids were working alongside [[Michael Snyder|Mike]] and [[Megan]] to get Chris banned from The GAMe PLACe.

==Why Chris appears to be gay==

[[Image:564Homos.jpg|thumb|left|At least Chris doesn't [[fail]] at cataloging pictures. [[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality No, it's not a shoop.]]]]

[[Image:CWCMonica.jpg|thumb|Oh lawd, is dat some lipstick on Chris?]]

{{quote|First off, should such images [of men's asses] enter your mind at random, just stop yourself. I have had this problem too. I would take all such images when they enter my mind and just delete them; I imagine, in my mind, rolling them all into a ball, shrinking it down, and tossing them into a garbage can that links to my Stomach through a direct bodily vein. I imagine the feeling of it falling through the vein and making its splash landing into the stomach acid and dissolving; gone forever.|[[Mailbag 4|Mailbag #4]] - Chris admitting he's had homoerotic fantasies.}}

[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|Fun Fact: [[Rainbow]] colors are the internationally recognized colors for the gay pride movement.]]
[[Image:Sonichuballs.jpg|thumb|For someone who claims to be straight, Chris sure does love talking about BALLS. Also, balls are touching.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|That's one [[pickle|phallic]] [[Lego]] tower you're building there, Chris.]]
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]

Ironically, the harder Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|tries to convince people]] he's straight, the more gay he appears. He has absolutely no awareness that an uptight, milquetoast, colorfully-dressed, squeaky-voiced man saying "I am straight! I have a subscription to ''Playboy''!"<ref>[[CWC Update 18 January 2009]]</ref> every five minutes looks like he has something he's trying to hide. Furthermore, the more we learn about Chris, the more gay he really appears to be.

* Christian has stated that if he were unable to stay straight he would undergo sex reassignment surgery; he would rather be female than gay. It should be noted that straight men never, ever, put this much thought into this hypothetical dilemma.<ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref>
* He collects [[My Little Pony]] figures well into early adulthood.
* For a straight man, he sure does [[Semen#Transcript|consume a lot of semen]]. Likewise, the idea of [[Kacey Phone Call|licking his own ejaculate]] off one of his gal-pals sexually arouses him.
* Like many gay men, most of his [[gal-pal|"friends"]] were female and he never slept with any of them.
* In a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN Chat with Julie]], Chris admitted that he randomly has images of penises (his own and others he's seen in porn) pop into his head. He also claims to hear voices in his head that say "Christian is gay." Unless Chris is having ''very specific'' auditory hallucinations, it's likely he has homoerotic daydreams and freaks out about it. In the same chat he sounded ''delighted'' describing the first time he saw semen in a porno movie as a teenager.
* He owns, or at least has owned, anal beads and a vibrator, and he is on record as having experimented with putting both toys in his anus. In a chat during the [[Vanessa Saga]] on 16 [[April 2009]], he claimed that he no longer shoved things up his ass, except for "a narrow jet of water from my adjustable shower-head on a hose."<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 3|Vanessa IRC Chat III]]</ref> Although it is quite possible to stick things up your butt and still be straight, people who are terrified of being turned gay generally do not do this.
* Chris said that he would put something up his ass for [[Ivy]] "in a heartbeat," including a large fake dick, and would let her fuck him with a strap-on.<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 7|Vanessa IRC Chat VII]]</ref>
* Chris said that he might let a gay guy fuck him if Ivy wanted that.<ref>[[Vanessa IRC Chat 9|Vanessa IRC Chat IX]]</ref>
* Christian argues that the vibrator and anal beads were sent to him as a gift with an order of straight pornography; he did not ask for them or pay for them. However, according to [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|the receipts]] that were uncovered by trolls, Chris specifically asked for the anal beads as the gift.
* Chris kept the vibrator around for months.
* In the [[Chris Sex Logs]], Chris shows off a dildo to [[PandaHalo]]. He immediately suggests the phallic sex toy is something that [[Sex_Logs#This_is_my_dildo|goes up your butt]], and then immediately denies it's been up his butt. He also says having a dildo in your butt "will feel good."
* On [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009|5 February 2009]] Chris posted two videos stating that he was coming out of the closet as a gay man. He later issued a retraction which was far less persuasive.
* When negotiating for the safe return of his PSN account from [[Max]], Chris was given the choice of burning his [[medallion]] or shoving it up his ass. Chris immediately chose to shove it up his ass.
* Chris thought a straight woman would be turned on by a [[nudes|closeup picture of his anus]].
* He wears a pink [[Belt Buckle of Fail|belt buckle]].
* He owns a set of [[Anime Wings|anime wings]] which are basically hair clips. And hair clips are for women.
* His best man at [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|his wedding]] is [[Sarah Hammer]] in drag.
* He sang "I Love the Nightlife" on his [[Chris's Big Night Out|visit to a local bar/restaurant]], which is popular at gay clubs and drag revues.
* [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|''Christian and the Hedgehog Boys'']] features two covers of the [[Wikipedia:Backstreet Boys|Backstreet Boys]], one cover of a [[Britney Spears]] song, and one cover of a [[Wikipedia:Ricky Martin|Ricky Martin]] song. This music was popular among thirteen-year-old girls when it was new and is popular among the gay community today.
* [[muscle bra|He wears a bra.]] In fairness, he uses it to [[Fridays After Five|try to attract women]].
* He [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|implores men to wear bras]] because looking at shirtless men makes Chris uncomfortable,<ref>[[Mailbag 55#On brassieres|Mailbag 55]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 55#Draconian_fun.21|Mailbag #55]]</ref> possibly arousing latent homosexual urges.
* When you look up "Homosexuality" in Chris's [[CWCipedia|own web encyclopedia]], you ''literally'' see his own portrait (as shown on the screencap at the top of this section).
* In the [[PS3 History Level]] video, he showed that he actually owns a copy of [[Wikipedia:Sex and the City (film)|''Sex and the City'']] (the film) when he showcased his then current collection of [[PS3]] games and movies.
* In his response to a letter in [[Mailbag 4]] about "impure" homoerotic thoughts, Chris confesses that he "[has] had this problem too," and has to resort to deleting them through a curious process that involves dropping the thoughts into his stomach acid, lest the gay gene take its toll.
* Chris reacts to [[Alec Benson Leary]]'s ''[[Asperchu]]'' comics by giving the all the characters a free makeover.
* In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], Chris donates some of his "straight blood" to doctors in the future so that they could make a vaccine against homosexuality. Vaccines are made from people who have the virus being fought.
* One of Chris's ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' vehicles is called "A Man's Toy", which is a light blue carriage with [[rainbow]] lollipop wheels and a message that says "Tea parties are good and nice" on the rear end of the carriage.<ref>http://community.modnation.com/en-us/players/Sonichu/creations/1296110</ref>
* In the guise of his trollsona [[JenkinsJinkies]], Chris used [[Trollin' Train]] to go into far more detail than was necessary about a supposed homosexual encounter, describing various acts with a relish out of place for someone who claims to be disgusted by the mere thought of a penis.
* He [[Tomgirl|dressed up as a woman]] and went out in public.

==Defenses against becoming homo==
[[Image:CWCIsSTRAIGHT.jpg|thumb|According to Chris, heterosexuals defend their sexuality by taping index cards indicating their straightness to their shoes (while stomping on [[vibrator]]s). Srsly.]]
It's hard work for a warrior of true love and honesty to stay straight. Luckily, Chris has a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] which he stares at everyday to stave off temptations of homosexuality.

Chris also subscribes to ''[[Wikipedia:Playboy|Playboy]]'' to help keep himself straight. You can tell he's straight because when he's explaining what he finds attractive in women it only takes five seconds for him to get around to boobies and [[China|vaginas]].

When homosexual (or potentially homosexual) [[trolls|fans]] sent Chris questions on the [[CWCipedia]] asking for tips to STAY STRAIGHT, Chris tends to offer what essentially amounts to self-brainwashing. Some of his ideas include thinking of naked women and how awesome they are, and imagining being struck by painful lightning whenever a homosexual thought occurs with an extremely severe and disproportionate punishment).<ref name="ReferenceA"/> He also clarifies that one need not buy their own poster of fail; any poster featuring attractive women (preferably in bikinis and looking sexy) will do the trick.

To prevent future homos, he also encourages women to not drink, smoke, or be physically abused while pregnant because he believes this could cause the baby to be born homosexual.<ref>[[Mailbag 5#Daniel Tammet/Punching your baby will make it gay|Mailbag #5]]</ref>

In ''[[Kill De Jack]]'', Chris reveals another one of his defenses against becoming a homo: he covers a section of his "[[CWC-ism|computer]]" (we can assume that he means "computer screen") with a piece of paper so that he can browse [[CWCipedia]] without looking at [[Jack Thaddeus]]'s ads featuring pictures of homosexual men.

It seems that the centerfold poster of [[The_Simpsons#Marge_Poster|Marge's ''Playboy'' magazine]] has become one of Chris's many defenses against becoming a homo. The fact that she's married has [[kacey|no bearing on Chris's desires]].

{{quote|But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust in his eye has already committed adultery with her in his heart.|-Matthew 28, [[Chris and religion|something Chris has probably never read, nor wouldn't care to read.]]}}

==Chris on his alleged homosexuality==

[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]]]

* "I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT! I WILL NOT BE VEERED INTO ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!!!"<ref>[[Masturbating and squirtin']]</ref>
* "I'M STRAIGHT! I'M STRAIGHT! '''YOU'RE THE HOMOS!''' EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!"<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref>
* "I'm straight, don't doubt me!"<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref>
* "Listen, as hard as you fucking can, I CAME OUT OF MY AUTISTIC [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|CLOSET]] AS A STRAIGHT MAN, and NOTHING ELSE. SO YOU IMMATURE JERKS CAN JUST FUCK OFF."<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref>
* "Yep, you heard me. I am...a [[gaybian|gaaaaaaaaay...bian]]."<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the First Video]]</ref>
* "Anyway the, uh- anyway so, to get to the point...fine. I'm guhh. I'm gaaaay. I'm gaay. I said it...OK. Yep. So...did I really come out of the closet there? That just depends on y'all- how y'all understand it."<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Transcript of the Second Video]]</ref>
* "And look at me. Do I look like- [*shakes head in disagreement*] '''No more of those stupid acquisition messages!''' Get it through your fucking, individual, damn, dirty SKULLS! '''I. Am. STRAIGHT!'''"<ref>''[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts]]''</ref>

Curiously, in his own [[A Public Announcement for Congress|campaign ad]], Chris announced a promise of "gay marriage ability for every state within the United Nations." Suffice to say, this has not helped him in the polls.

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = It's OK to be GAY, Chris-chan!
| video = {{#ev:youtube|32F2Dw01kJc}}
| Stardate = 5 August 2009
| Maker = CWCvillelulz
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = CWC (Ian Brandon Anderson) Comes Clean...
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Bx6MF90NcTo}}
| Stardate = 5 January 2010
| Maker = Psycatalyst
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Homosexuality}}

* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Chris and religion]]
* [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
* [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
* [[Gay 4 Sonichu]]
* [[Gaybian]] (a "male lesbian", according to Chris)
* [[It's UGH!]]
* [[Rainbow]]
* [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]]
* [[Magi-Chan]]
* [[Heather Iglesias]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyO3pnkI3H4 CWC (Ian Brandon Anderson) finally admits it.]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE9hdbiwA3k Chris-chan is sick of the lies!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOpGtblij8Y Chris-chan proves those slanderous trolls wrong.]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Homos]]

Autism

2011-04-29T21:54:08Z

Raku: account closed

{{quote|I'm POSSIBLY [[retarded]]...|Chris on his autism, [[Mumble]] chat 23 February 2009}}

{{quote|I'M RETARDED|Chris, [[CWC - Exposing Jeff]]}}

{{quote|It sometimes takes me a long while before I can fully comprehend and make an appropriate reaction. In another word, '''I am Sometimes Retarded'''.|Chris, on himself.<ref>6th paragraph down: http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality</ref>}}

[[Image:086-BionicFlag.jpg|thumb|[[Bionic the Hedgehog]] "conquering" autism (and "ATcI3") by confusing windmills with watermills.]]
[[Image:461-AutismFight.jpg|thumb|Chris at war with autism (or "ATSIMU") in [[China]]. Too bad you can't fight cannons with [[fangs]].]]
[[Image:Autismcard.jpg|thumb|He plays this card a lot.]]

'''Autism''' is a spectrum of neurological disorders involving the impairment of social interaction and communication. The cause of autism is unknown, but has been shown to have multiple genetic factors. The symptoms usually manifest before the age of 3 and are generally irreversible; there is no cure, although the condition can be treated. Autistic individuals are generally not retarded — they mostly have average intelligence — although obviously severe social impairment can coincide with stunted learning and development. [[Asperger syndrome]] is generally considered part of the autistic spectrum; individuals with Asperger syndrome generally have above-average intelligence, although they still suffer from the social and communicative impairments. Prognosis depends on the severity of the autism and the effectiveness of its treatment; autistic people may learn to live relatively normal, productive lives or they may have become so unable to function in society that they must be institutionalized.

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] has built much of his identity around being autistic. His terror of being associated with severely autistic/retarded people causes him to be overly eager to prove his basic competence and cite his success in primary and secondary education. At the same time, his pride from accomplishing these things in spite of his disability has conditioned him to demand outrageous praise for his slightest efforts and infinite patience for his gravest errors. Moreover, Chris's belief that the entire Greene County Board of Education continues to irrationally persecute him for his autism has left him suspicious of opposing points of view and resolute that anti-autistic prejudice is the reason for any of his setbacks. In short, it is impossible to understand Chris's [[Chris and anger|defensiveness]], [[stress|hypersensitivity]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissism]], [[Chris and remorse|irresponsibility]], [[Man in the Pickle Suit|paranoia]], [[100 2178|victimhood]], and [[Story of My Current Days|self-pity]] without understanding his relationship with autism.

Chris, in typical Chris fashion, not only seems to think that having autism imbues him with a [[Chris and his ego|special significance]], but also seems to think that his autism is different from that of every other person in the world who has autism. Because, y'know, everything to do with Chris has to be [[slow-in-the-minds|special]]. Because he's autistic, Chris is, naturally, better than everyone else (because having autism automatically makes him a genius), and everyone should acknowledge how utterly brilliant he is. At the same time, Chris is not responsible for anything he ever does wrong, because he is autistic and that means it's not his fault if he [[Twin Falling Towers|does]] [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|stupid]] [[Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_Out_of_College|things]].

==High-functioning vs. low-functioning==

Informally, autism may be subdivided into separate classifications based on the intelligence and degree of function the autistic individual possesses; i.e., high-functioning, medium-functioning, and low-functioning. Chris has latched onto this concept and will frequently qualify his condition, saying he has '''high-functioning autism''', or '''HFA'''. Generally, HFA is loosely defined as the ability to live in the mainstream world as opposed to being institutionalized, near-normal comprehension, fluent speech, and about-average intellect. This lets Chris have it both ways: you can't blame him for his failures because he has autism, but you can't treat him like he's retarded because he's ''high-functioning'' and therefore, nearly normal.

[[Trolls]] have often noted that the "high-functioning" qualifier is '''not''' a clinical diagnosis and is '''not''' recognized by the [[Wikipedia:DSM-IV|DSM-IV-TR]] or the [[Wikipedia:ICD-10|ICD-10]]. This usually goes hand-in-hand with questioning the severity and/or diagnosis of Chris's impairment, if not outright calling him a [[lie|liar]]. However, the Chandlers didn't make the "HFA" label up, and compared to kids who can barely speak and just walk in circles all day, Chris is relatively close to neurotypical. Semantics aside, though, even the most casual of observers would conclude that Chris is basically non-functioning.

Disgustingly, but perhaps not surprisingly, Chris detests [[Slow-in-the-minds|low-functioning autistics]] in the [[Chris and hypocrisy|exact manner]] that he fears normal people will detest him. In [[Mailbag 25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]], he compares those with low-functioning autism with those who suffer from severe retardation or severe brain damage, thinking that they would have their arms linked together, have deformations, be confined to wheelchairs or crutches and drool and grunt and growl. He has also compared them to "zombies".<ref>[[Mailbag_5#In which Chris speaks ill of the handicapped|Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_11#Elevators are important for the handicapped, so they don't want any phobias|Mailbag 11]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]]</ref> In his [[Father Call|phone call to Matt Devoria]]. The irony of his resentment toward 'Low Functioning' Autistic people is that he has a severely autistic cousin, as revealed in the [[autism papers]]; this probably means that either Chris is not aware of his own relatives (very probable), or he has disowned members of his own family on the basis of them having the same medical condition that he has (albeit more severely affected by it), being the autism-nazi he is.

He explains that he refuses to date a girl with any form of autism because he fears that seeing them will make him think about what he might be like if he had anything other than high-functioning autism.{{cite}} Chris believes he can do much more than any low-functioning autistic could, even as he's living with [[Bob|his]] [[Barb|parents]], has never had a real girlfriend, and [[Dirty, crapped briefs|shits his pants]] on a semiregular basis.<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

Despite all this, though, presuming Chris is autistic, he is high-functioning since he can talk. However, this also means that he has the same medical condition as [[Microsoft|Bill Gates]] and the creator of [[Pokémon]], yet he has failed to do anything with his life, hence proving that his vulgarity and failure are utterly his fault.

{{clear}}

==Onset and diagnosis of Chris's autism==

{{quote|No one GIVES A SHIT that you are autistic, they NEVER DID| [[Jackie E-mails 23|Jackie]]}}
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|Now GodBearJesus can't get him to shut up.]]

Chris's version of how he developed autism is best explained in the [[Song of Christian]] video. There he explains how a [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]] locked him in a room filled with toys at around age 1 1/2. After bawwwing for hours, he emerged from his lair unable to talk (which implies that Chris could talk before this incident, and that would be in direct contradiction to Chris's own parents stating that he never spoke until around the age of seven); as Chris himself puts it, "God put the mute button on me." Most specialists claim that these symptoms of autism begin to show around that age anyway,<ref>[[wikipedia:Autism#Characteristics|Wikipedia: Autism Characteristics]]</ref> so even if the events of the story happened, the babysitter didn't cause the autism. It is far, far more likely that one or both of Chris's parents simply looked for anyone to blame for Chris's sudden loss of language development.

It is not currently clear how Chris came to be considered as "autistic," although Chris has claimed that his parents possess official documentation about this in a safe. When pressed to release this information, he provided a [[autism papers|2004 psychiatric evaluation]] that states Chris was diagnosed with autism when he was "around age five or six." However, there's no way to be sure if the evaluator simply wrote down Chris's responses to his questions or independently verified them. (For example, Chris might not remember his exact age when he was diagnosed, but you'd think his medical records could be more precise than "five or six.") By the time of the Chandlers' legal battle with Greene County, Chris's autism seemed to have become a universally accepted fact, but the details of how, when, and where Chris was diagnosed remain a mystery.

When recounting his childhood, Chris usually skips straight from the "evil babysitter" incident to age seven, so we know very little about what (if any) treatment he received during this crucial period of development. In a [[CWCipedia]] [[mailbag]], Chris claims that when he was young, his parents were told he would never be able to read, write or function on a normal level. He and his doctors have now upgraded his condition to "high-functioning," but apparently his incredibly abysmal upbringing has actually allowed it to progress to mid-functioning at best. However, his characteristics and development throughout his life may put him in the "Childhood Disintegrating Disorder" category, as he has become worse and worse over the years.

In his "Song of Christian" video, he explains that his mother took him to the toy department and coaxed him to read aloud the names of Go-Bots, and later [[Transformers]]. Chris says he began speaking again when he was seven— that is, in [[1989]], when the Transformers line was on its last legs and the Go-Bots line had long since vanished. This would seem to indicate that this form of "therapy" had to have gone on for several years before producing any results.

{{clear}}

==Persecution==

Chris attended [[Greene County Primary School]], apparently without incident, from age 5 until age 9. Problems arose for him in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], where he alleges that the faculty wanted to remove him from mainstream classrooms and send him to what he calls an institution. He also claims that the teachers at the school held him down and recorded his screams. Chris frequently cites this as evidence that the school was senselessly cruel towards him, for no reason apparent to him except an innate fear and distrust of autistic people. More probable, given Chris's ongoing behavioral issues, is that he forced the faculty to restrain him by refusing to restrain himself. There's no way to know if Greene Elementary treated Chris unfairly, but the incident does suspiciously resemble Chris's [[arrest]] in July 2005. The Chandlers sued to prevent the school board from removing Chris from mainstream education before ultimately relocating to Chesterfield County to continue Chris's mainstreaming there.

There's no way to know how much of Chris's attitude about the Greene County crisis is based on his personal recollections or what he was later told by his parents, who themselves seem unusually paranoid about the county's vendetta against their family. However, the result of the incident is clear: Chris emerged from adolescence firmly believing that many people not only misunderstand autistic people but hate and fear them. He seems to believe this prejudice is based not on a person's actions (e.g., throwing fits and irrationally screaming) but on a person's mere identification as autistic, regardless of function. Given Chris's fear of low-functioning autistics, he may in fact think this prejudice is perfectly justified, but wrongfully targeted at a high-functioning individual. Of course, in Chris's mind, he may as well be the only high-functioning autistic in the universe, so he is the one and only innocent victim in "everyone's favorite game, [[Kick the Autistic]]."

Chris's [[Chris and Rape|tactful and sensitive]] comments on a news story about a woman with [[Asperger Syndrome]] being raped revealed that he believes the media, like the rest of the world, has a bias against autism similar to [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missing_white_woman_syndrome "Missing White Woman Syndrome"], and that the story wouldn't have been reported if the victim was a woman with "proper" autism.

==Chris's symptoms==

Many [[troll]]s dispute the exact diagnosis of Chris's mental condition, on the basis that his observed behavior is inconsistent with various autistic people. CWC-related forums (and other forums, for that matter) have seen numerous testimonials about people who are undeniably autistic but nowhere near as fucked-up as Chris has turned out to be, and in general these forums do not consider Chris to be an example of what all autistic people are like. Quite often, autistics are indeed able to learn social skills to some small degree in the context of intellectual learning. Some can even come off as being completely neurotypical because they have come to realize that, while they believe "normal" behavior has a tenuous definition, they must adapt to others' expectations of what's acceptable if they wish to succeed in life. Chris, however, demonstrates a willful ignorance of normalcy, with a sense of entitlement coupled with an expectation that others should not only understand his ridiculous idiosyncrasies in the first place, but also accept them or even force [[Dating education|them]] upon others.

A layperson may come to the conclusion that Chris is not autistic, and he's just a regular (albeit idiotic) guy with a few "eccentricities" (more like psychotic), or jump to the other extreme and conclude that Chris has full-blown mental retardation. However, Chris's characteristics are most likely a combination of [[Barbara|bad parenting]] and genuine autism. The following are aspects of Chris's character that clearly match autistic tendencies:

[[Image:0695-AnnaBD9.JPG|thumb|right|Awkward body language, as Chris displays here, is a common trait of autism.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|left|Stacking objects is a common symptom of autism, and is often one of its first signs in a young child.]]

*Chris displays virtually no coherent, working theory of mind. This is the essence of autism: autistics have difficulty gauging others' internal, subjective thoughts, feelings, ideas, intents and so on; understanding that these might be different than their own; and predicting their behavior based on these differences. Indeed, the prefix "aut-" is a form of "auto-", meaning "self," as in "automobile," meaning "self-moving". In [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|an email between Clyde Cash and him]], he sent Clyde a link to [[The MovingFoward videos|a video he made of himself destroying his PS3]]. He destroyed his PS3 under the egregiously mistaken impression that he'd be given $9,001 for it, which is in itself an indicator of his fundamental inability to gauge others' actual intents and future behavior. He filmed himself doing it specifically to prove to Clyde, who wasn't present for the destruction, that it happened according to the video's objective portrayal. However, he added that if Clyde showed the video to anyone Chris didn't mean to see it without paying him the money, "it can be considered [Clyde's] Word Alone, possible Movie Editing and Actors, and NOT Fact" as though the video would have any less evidential weight on others if he denied to them what he rightfully claimed to Clyde that it showed with enough certitude that he would give him thousands of dollars because of its being shown.

*Chris places disproportional importance on literal statements, another trait of autism. This is related to the above. Chris acted as though he could convince others of a fact contrary to videographic evidence simply by stating it. Another example is virtually the entire [[Liquid Chris#Liquid Saga|Liquid saga]], where Chris honestly, fervently, pathetically tried to demonstrate what was already blatantly obvious to everyone: that his name is not Ian Brandon Anderson and that Liquid was not him. He seemed to believe strongly enough [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|to become visibly frustrated]] that others might believe Liquid's statements in the face of the obvious that he had to continually counteract those statements with his own as though just the statements were the most important or most effective means of proving what everyone already knew.

*Chris is extremely gullible. One need only see his extensive [[list of sweethearts]] to see just how easily fooled he is. In addition, not only has he been fooled by trolls pretending to be girls, he has fallen for trolls pretending to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] and approaching him about making a Sonichu game. A telling statement comes from the aforementioned email to Clyde: "even if you upload the video yourself, it '''can be''' considered YOUR Word Alone[.]" (''emphasis added'') Chris might operate on the assumption that if a thing ''can be'' true, it's always reasonable to behave as though it ''is'' true no matter how slight the chance and no matter how much more likely it is to be false.

*Chris lacks a conversational filter. He calls this [[Honest Content|honesty]]; normal people call it social retardation. Without provocation he will tell you about his pinkeye and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]], and how he is a [[virgin with rage]]. Only when his [[Barbara|mother]] told him to knock it off did he actually give up telling everyone he's a virgin.

*Chris can't show emotions well with facial expressions and body language. See [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters|his statement to the women of the world]] if you like having Chris haunt your dreams. His inability to display emotions on his face has been called a "[[The Creepy Stare|dead fish expression]]." When he does attempt to have an expression, it looks very cartoonish. He typically speaks in a monotone, and his attempts to sound expressive (see [[CWC's Message for Ivy]]) come off as creepy and unnatural.

*Chris has very poor facial and vocal recognition skills. [[Julie]] was a 13 year old boy using an obvious falsetto and Chris fell for it. In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|one chat]], the boy made no attempt to disguise his voice and Chris was none the wiser, disclosing personal sexual details. Two images of different people were used to represent [[Blanca Weiss]], and Chris didn't notice. In an [[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|AIM Chat]] with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], she sent him a link to pictures of Megan Fox, and Chris complimented her on them. It should be noted that the two have entirely different skin colors.

*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Chris lacks empathy]] and concern for others. See his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|plea]] to Clyde. His suggestion after the loss of [[Ryan Cash]] was "find yourself a girlfriend." He asks for ED to [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|please understand]] him, because he is an "innocent victim of misunderstanding"—he wants empathy from others, but he can't return the favor. Chris primarily sees other people in terms of what they can provide for him; when accused of overstepping his bounds or other wrongdoing, he has no concept of [[Chris and remorse|remorse or apology]] except as something he must do to continue receiving favors. When forced to apologize, he makes insincere apologies followed immediately by further demands.

*Chris has trouble developing relationships. Many neurotypical people have the same problem, but Chris is particularly inept at socializing. He has no filter on what he says and cannot empathize with others, key prerequisites for successfully interacting with people. He also pretty much just talks about himself.

*Chris thinks in absolutes and in terms of clearly defined steps in order to do something. He thinks there must be sex on or by the [[third date]]. He describes his sadness in terms of his [[heart level]] and briefly mentioned a [[Scale of Respect]]. He feels that if he just knows the correct steps to getting a [[sweetheart]], he will be able to find one easily. His [[dating education|crash-course in dating]] and [[Dating|suggestions to Blanca]] assume that a relationship should follow a rigidly predetermined progression instead of a natural flow.
**In the [[Jackie E-mails 23|final exchange of e-mails with Jackie,]] Chris responded to Jackie's frank descriptions of his habits and lifestyle by telling her she had exceeded the "Hurtful Truth Level"; While he knows he should be appreciative of hearing the truth about himself, this was the only way he could wrap his brain around the abstract idea enough to be able to tell her he thought she'd gone too far.

*Chris tends to use solipsistic neologisms; that is, he creates new words that only he himself understands and expects other people to comprehend them. Many articles on this very wiki have been written to explain the resulting [[CWC-isms]].

*Chris exhibits compulsive and repetitive behavior. He wears the same [[shirt]] for days at a time, and uses the same terms and [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|exact]] [[boyfriend-free girl|phrases]] [[sweetheart from the ground-up|frequently]]. He feels the need to refer to people by their full names, plainly visible when he talks about himself, [[Clyde Cash]], or [[Adam Stackhouse]].

*Chris has an extremely narrow range of interests. He seems to only give a damn about video games, prowling for his next [[sweetheart]], his initials, and [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], so much to the point where he practically places [[Sonichu (character)|him]] somewhere in everything he creates. He often wishes to [[dating|combine]] two [[LBP#First Date Level|interests]].

*Although he does not demonstrate any [[Honor Roll|competency]] with them, Chris has a fixation on numbers and statistics that would generally be irrelevant to others. He describes measures in concrete terms (e.g. "5 mies[sic] from the city"<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_0/Page_2</ref> instead of "outside the city"), and has a particular obsession with times and dates, timestamping nearly every scene in the comic and giving his characters birthdays that have no relevance to the plot (unless it becomes convenient to "[[pedofork|age up]]" the characters). Needless to say, Chris's tendency to blurt out exact dates and times (assuming he's not lying off his ass) has made the job of [[CWChronology|CWCki chronologists]] much easier. On the other hand, his haphazard treatment of dates and times in the comic has led to countless [[continuity#Chronology|continuity errors]].

*Chris's given reasons for his love of [[My Little Pony]] are also indicative of autism. Autistics are drawn to physical sensations which give them a feeling of being 'grounded', and this is probably why Chris finds stroking the hair of these toys so "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|therapeutic]]".

*Chris lacks social awareness. One notable instance, as revealed in the [[autism papers]], was when two [[Niggos|African American]] ladies were speaking to Chris about his love quest, when Chris politely told them that they could not be his girlfriend because they were not white. Based on the report of the examiner, Chris believed he was merely informing the ladies as to his prerequisites for a potential sweetheart while oblivious to the fact he was being racially insensitive.<ref>[[Autism_papers#IDENTIFYING_STATEMENT:]]</ref>

*Unnatural relationships with objects are also a sign of autism; Chris has an evident obsessions with his [[medallion]], his [[PS3]], and any number of other items that clutter up his [[Chris's room|room]]. Since autistic people have difficulty maintaining relationships with people they often end up becoming emotionally dependent on objects.

*Chris also appears to have echolalia, a common symptom of autism. This means that he constantly repeats phrases from his favorite television shows, movies and video games, regardless of whether they fit the current situation.

==Chris's misconceptions about autism==
It's not clear that Chris has any understanding of what, precisely, autism is, except that a) he has it, b) it's a bad thing, and c) he's a brave little boy for living with it. His song [[A-U-T-I-S-M]] sums up his attitudes about the disorder:

{{quote|A-U-T-I-S-M: what does it mean? Silence and friends unseen! A few brains as well: that is autism! And that makes us seem special to you!|Chris, attempting to spell out autism in more ways than one}}

To Chris, that's all it is — a condition that makes you a bit smarter than normal and mysteriously makes people not want to be your friend.

Chris also seems to only be aware of the symptoms of autism that fit in with his odd, pseudo-Bohemian lifestyle. Asexuality is very common in autistic people; this is because any form of romance or sex is too intimate for an autistic mind to cope with. This completely contradicts Chris's "[[Love Quest]]" and suggests that he is actually trying to compensate for his inability to feel true sexual attraction, even if that means becoming a genuinely disturbing pervert.

Chris [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|considers himself to have "Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People",]] suggesting that he believes [[Chris and his Ego|the disorder did not even exist before he was born]].

In a [[May 2010]] [[Some Favored Comedians|video]], he opined that our society is spending so much time on the internet that ''everyone'' is becoming autistic.<ref>[[Toucher and Rich Segment#Chris's Response|Chris responds to Toucher and Rich, May 2009]]</ref><ref>[[Some Favored Comedians]]</ref> This further proves that people with no social contact should not attempt social commentary. Well, that and Chris has no fucking clue what his own disorder is actually ''like''. More recently he tried to use this excuse to guilt trip [[Jackie]] into being sorry for yelling at him, which worked as well as you'd expect.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref>

===Chris on the causes of autism===
There's a broad scientific consensus that autism largely arises from genetic factors. Chris's own case is consistent with the theory that children born to older parents (Bob and Barb were 54 and 40, respectively, when Chris was conceived) are at greater risk of developing autism.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_autism#Genetics</ref>

Chris's own expressed views on the root causes of autism are all over the map. He's espoused a few different theories at different times and in different situations. His oldest theory, dating back to the [[Song of Christian]] in the late 1990s, is that the [[abusive babysitter]] was responsible for his condition. In more recent years (specifically, during [[Mumble 3|his arguments with]] [[Clyde Cash]] in early 2009, he said that "scientifically speaking, [autism] has possibly come from a drug, or otherwise it may possibly be genetic", and that the babysitter incident merely "brought out the, uh, curse that was buried within me."

When explaining his condition to [[Father Call|Matt Devoria]] late in the fall of 2009, Chris insisted that autism has no genetic factors. In that instance, however he had an obvious agenda. He hoped to convince Matt that any children he fathered on Matt's daughter [[Kacey]] wouldn't wind up inheriting his condition; because of this, it's difficult to say exactly how sincere he happened to be at that moment.

To muddle the issue even ''further'', in [[Mailbag 12]], Chris blamed the cause of autism on a shot "the doctor's optionally give to the child after birth", apparently in reference to the highly disputed urban myth alleging that childhood vaccinations lead to autism. It's not likely that Chris even has that much of an awareness of the facts and assertions of said myth, and was probably looking for a throwaway excuse to deny any hereditary factors.

In his [[Autism Tutorial Part 1|Autism Tutorial]] from early 2011, Chris slewed back toward a more mainstream view, discussing the genetic factors behind autism and complaining about how his parents conceived him late in life. He also, however, warned viewers that smoking, drinking, or exposure to car exhaust could cause dangerous genetic damage that might result in autistic children.

===Chris versus Asperger syndrome===
{{see also|Asperger syndrome}}

Chris is easily outraged by any attempt to associate or confuse autism, high-functioning or otherwise, with Asperger syndrome, a similar condition now considered by many experts to overlap with HFA on the autistic spectrum. (In fact, it has been proposed that Asperger syndrome be placed on the autism spectrum in the new DSM-V, making both the condition and "high-functioning autism" one and the same.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DSM-V#Asperger_syndrome</ref>) At times, Chris has stated that he dislikes Asperger syndrome because sufferers of the disorder supposedly steal sympathy away from autism awareness. He has also claimed that the name is too close to "ass burger" or "ass booger" for his taste. In the early days of the CWCipedia Mailbag, asking Chris about Asperger syndrome was the most effective way to troll him; this culminated in the creation of [[Asperchu]].

In the present, Chris simply hates Asperger syndrome because it reminds him of how angry he got the last time someone brought it up - in other words, a completely unjustifiable opinion. Chris has declared himself "close-minded" on the subject, dismissing all scientific opinion contrary to his own, and angrily refuses to be convinced that he does not occupy a superior tier of social retardation.

==Chris on autism education==
Chris is a firm believer in mainstream education for children with autism, a trait he doubtlessly picked up from his parents, who went to [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|incredible lengths]] to keep him in mainstream classrooms throughout his school years. Aside from speech therapy lessons intended to help him recover from his period of muteness as a child, as far as the available records indicate, Chris has never received any sort of special education geared towards dealing with his autism or related issues.

[[Mailbag 12|When asked for his advice on how to raise an autistic child]], Chris replied "...Most Importantly, MAINSTREAM; let your child be free to communicate and associate with the Normal Society. Special Education is okay, but that will not do in the longest run." Later, [[Mailbag 15|for advice on how "to succeed despite being afflicted with Asperger's"]], Chris's only response was, "My advice is to Mainstream the child."

During a [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|video from April 2010]], Chris read off a lengthy printout of autism-related information. After quoting a passage about how the education of autistic children should be undertaken by trained professionals in specialized settings, Chris offered his own opinion.

{{quote|As for me though, I highly recommend mainstreaming, lettin' 'em go though normal life. I mean yeah, give 'em the special treatment while they're young... but when you get 'em in elementary or middle school... or high school, mainstream is the way to go.|Chris, [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]}}

In short, Chris believes that the approach that produced the man as we know him today (i.e. ignoring the problem) is [[List of Chris's lies|the best possible way to raise and educate children with autism.]]

==Autism cured?==

[[Image:454-CWCsPossibleFuture.JPG|thumb|Autism appears to be in Chris's future...]]

Chris's greatest dream is that his autism might one day be cured (although in 2006 he would have unhesitatingly sacrificed such a cure in order to obtain a [[PS3|PlayStation 3]]). There are instances of children inexplicably recovering from the symptoms, but there is no known cure for autism that can simply be applied to everyone like Chris's "homo vaccine." Imagine the surprise of the mental health community, then, when Chris revealed in [[March 2009]] that he had overcome his autism once and for all:<ref>[[Sarah Reveals Herself]]</ref>

:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I'm not going to blame it on my autism; I have realized that I am over that now.
:'''Sarah May:''' Over what?
:'''Sarah May:''' Over your autism?
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' yes
:'''Sarah May:''' . . .
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' anyway, what is it that you want to do?
:'''Sarah May:''' Christian
:'''Sarah May:''' Are you serious?
:'''Sarah May:''' Autism is not influenza
:'''Sarah May:''' You don't 'get over it'
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I've broken out of my autistic shell, and I am better able to socialize in public, with the past practices online.

Chris claims during the same chat that he may not be making sense due to a virus, easily allowing for him to retract this. Fortunately, Chris has discovered that [[stress]] is a more socially popular scapegoat for his personal shortcomings. Of course, people learn to manage stress, but what do you expect?

As of [[May 2009]], Chris seems to have regained his autism and is back to [[Chris on Wikipedia|blaming it]] for all his problems, seemingly believing that autism is as easy to shake/regain as the common flu. Or he forgot that he even had the above conversation and is just retarded.

[[November 2009]] saw Chris claiming to have cured his autism again as stated at the end of part 2 on his [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] presentations (where he describes himself as a "high-functioning autistic ''recovered''"). A [[December 2009|month later]], Chris says in the [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|revised ED article]] in response to ED's claim he's "suffering" from autism, he comments "''which I still am for real.''"

Chris's flip-flopping self-diagnosis simply illustrates his misunderstanding of his problems. Since autism is his scapegoat for when he fucks up, to him that's really all it is — a disease that makes people fuck up all the time. Therefore, when he fails he has a bad case of autism, and when everything is going well (such as when he believes he has a girlfriend) he thinks the autism has gone away. What Chris really wants, then, is not a cure for autism but to live a life in which nothing happens that he would need to blame on his autism; that is, a life in which he has a girlfriend and nobody criticizes him.

==Things Chris has not blamed on his autism==
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|What did you expect?]]

==Chris and other autistics==

Listening to Chris go on about "us TRUE and HONEST autistics", you might think he has some kind of misplaced sense of autistic solidarity. But this would merely be dumb, and Chris-chan always shoots for both dumb and repugnant, so in reality he doesn't give a shit about anyone's autism but his own. He calls lower-functioning autistics than himself "windows onto hell" and regards them with [[Chris and Hypocrisy|exactly the same kind of fear and mistrust he bitches about people treating him with]]. He has also expressed a disdain for others with high-functioning autism, with HFA being one of the characteristics excluding a woman from being a [[attraction sign|potential sweetheart]]. Meanwhile, he looks at people with [[Asperger Syndrome]], who are on roughly the same part of the spectrum as him, as dirty whores trying to somehow steal the limelight from "real" autistics (read: Chris).

Chris has only once included another autistic person in his comics. In emails with [[Sarah Jackson]], she told Chris that her sister was also a high-functioning autistic. When Sarah was included in [[Episode_19#Episode_19:_Date_Ed_.28Even_Though_the_Idea_Sounds_Dated.29|Episode 19]], so was her sister, [[Rita]]. When Rita was given dialogue after Sarah's [[death]], what she said made so little sense grammatically (even for [[Chris and writing|Chris's standards]]) that it is hard to see it as unintentional. It can be speculated from this that Chris, thinking his own autism so much better than anyone else's, was attempting to make Rita seem very unintelligent as he assumes other autistics and people with mental disorders are.

For their part, people with autism universally facepalm when they look at Chris, and wish he'd fuck off and die and stop giving them a bad name. The deleted article about Chris on TV Tropes said it best: they wish he'd Stop Being Stereotypical and embodying the worst perceptions of their condition. The article also noted that to people with autism or Asperger's, Chris was "Paranoia Fuel", that is to say it scares them to think they're like him. For the actual high-functioning autistics out there, Chris himself is the "window onto hell".

The Aspies for Freedom website has had a couple of run-ins with Chris that nicely demonstrate how other autistics regard him:

* [http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=14371 Aspies For Freedom thread] where Chris or someone impersonating Chris asks for help against [[ED]]. The aspies offer the usual advice of ignoring the [[trolls]], which by the way is the best advice.

* [http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=15676 Aspies For Freedom thread] where someone asks about Chris, but everyone else just wants to avoid the drama. A few of them realize that what ED says is true even though it may be a "hate site". Apparently, previous drama involving Chris led them to disable registration.

Tl;dr: Chris has no support in the online autistic community unless it's from someone who would rather he commit suicide.

==Sauce==
<references/>

==See also==
* [[Asperger syndrome]]
* [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]
* [[A-U-T-I-S-M]]
* [[Autism Tutorial]]
* [[Chris and psychology]]
* [[Kick the Autistic]]
* [[Slow-in-the-minds]]
* [[Stress]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ix5Ith-fSU One Winged Autistic ]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Autistic Spectrum Disorders]]
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]

Talk:Chris-chan SonicBrainFart

2011-04-29T06:51:38Z

Raku: /* :/ */

==Transcript==
I'm working on one. Hang tight for the time being. --[[User:Ragumshnagum|Ragumshnagum]] 06:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

== :/ ==

Despite being actually pretty good, fan work pages got purged a long time ago. Until Chris responds directly to this, it really doesn't belong on the CWCki. <nowiki>*warms up the rocket to the moon*</nowiki>

Yeah, this need to be deleted. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 08:23, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

*I think it's time for that to change. This isn't just a fan video, it's a good summary of Chris-chan for those who don't really know anything about him. Not only that, but there's been next to no new content on this wiki in a very long time. I really don't see why we can't have this. --[[User:Ragumshnagum|Ragumshnagum]] 09:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::There are thousands of videos like this one. If we made a page for this, we'd have to make a page for all of them or play favorites, neither of which is a good idea. As Champthom has said elsewhere, lack of content doesn't mean we need to lower the barriers to entry. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 10:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
You know, I heard of Chris Chan because of this video XD... How sad, right? =( [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:51, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Talk:Tomgirl Pictures

2011-04-29T06:35:13Z

Raku:

In case anyone's wondering, the images are called "TG#" because TomGirl. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 19:09, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
* '''MY EYES!''' CAN NOT UNSEE! [[User:CFA|CFA]] 19:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)CFA

Is there ANY backstory to this?!? What I don't understand is that he 1) went into PUBLIC wearing this stuff (there's a picture of him at his mall) and 2) It looks like he shaved his underarms in one or two pictures...WHY?! Dear God why?! --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 19:26, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
* Pretty sure he always shaved his underarms. I don't know why I know that. --[[User:Kwippleton|Kwippleton]] 19:38, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:The article could use some clarification as to what the hell is going on here. There's gotta be some sort of story behind this. What's the deal? This is some of Chris's weirdest antics yet. Just when you think the lulcow ran dry... [[User:Abyssal|Abyssal]] 19:42, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Note that both ears are pierced, not just the gay ear (see: cucumbers on eyes pic). Also, that's his real hair and the images aren't censored; he's wearing a g-string. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 19:54, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: Are they really pierced or are they those clip on/magnet ones?? Is there anyway we can tell?? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:04, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:: They're real. Trust me. If they were clip ons, there would be more of an indent. I'm also pretty sure that clip ons are bigger. The ones I had as a kid certainly were, and I was pretty into those things. [[User:PedoforkBait|PedoforkBait]] 20:08, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::: That would make sense...I bet the ring/hoop ones are fake though, there's no hole for them in other pictures (unless he got them later). And why are they so oddly placed?? They aren't on the lobe like they should be...unless they've changed where they put them now (I got mine when I was 7). Or...could he have done them himself??? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:::: They are real. Also, I'm not aware of any way to have a stud clip-on. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 20:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
*At this point, he's gotta be fucking with us. He wants to gross us out, so we don't bother him. --[[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 20:05, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: You think he pierced his ears to get us to leave him alone? [[User:PeachyKeen|PeachyKeen]] 20:20, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

He's using a real camara to take his picture in some of these, that's unusual. I wonder what the poor guy who had to develop them was thinking. O_o [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 20:31, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

This is probably a long shot, however I really think he did this for a girl. Most likely a girl who liked to dress up as a guy and wanted Chris to do the same. Or it's a really, really good troll. Either way, whoever made him do this is really good at what they do, because these pictures are FUCKING DISGUSTING. [[User:Mikau|Mikau]] 20:54, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

The saddest thing about all this is that this didn't even suprise me in the slightest, I wasn't even mildly shocked to see Chris in drag, or even with a sock on his flacid manhood. --[[User:Gustofwind|Gustofwind]] 21:31, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: many are saying it isn't a sock...it's a g-string. You can't see the strings holding it up because of his gut roll over but when he does the picture of his butt, you can see the black thong part in the crack.....if you REALLY want to look that is. --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 21:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Goddaemnd monkey-assed hell. Well, what do we do with this page? Start describing shit? In fuckin' ''detail''?! It could stand as is, like the CWCki's own personal 'shock page'...--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 22:00, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

INFO, somebody has it. Where are the pictures from? Did he upload them somewhere? Or is it old stuff made public by trolls? --[[User:Cuprite|Cuprite]] 22:05, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:It's all recent and Clyde got it by hacking Chris' PSN. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 22:09, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::Excellent, this, coupled with the PSN being down, is probably the best chance we'll get at him returning. --[[User:Cuprite|Cuprite]] 22:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::PSN has been offline for a week all because of these photos, spread the word [[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 22:15, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:::In the meantime, someone try to find an appropreate picture of King Hippo from the Captain N cartoon; he also crossdresses, and he's also a fat, useless, discolored retard.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 22:17, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

In some of these, he looks uncannily like a fat version of Buffalo Bill. [[User:Vulture-chan|Vulture-chan]] 22:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

I was about to ask if the PSN take down made him go further down the crazy hole o_o [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

I also love the claims that he is "straight". Yeah, Chris is as "straight" as a circle >_> [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:34, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Talk:Tomgirl Pictures

2011-04-29T06:34:41Z

Raku:

In case anyone's wondering, the images are called "TG#" because TomGirl. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 19:09, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
* '''MY EYES!''' CAN NOT UNSEE! [[User:CFA|CFA]] 19:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)CFA

Is there ANY backstory to this?!? What I don't understand is that he 1) went into PUBLIC wearing this stuff (there's a picture of him at his mall) and 2) It looks like he shaved his underarms in one or two pictures...WHY?! Dear God why?! --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 19:26, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
* Pretty sure he always shaved his underarms. I don't know why I know that. --[[User:Kwippleton|Kwippleton]] 19:38, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:The article could use some clarification as to what the hell is going on here. There's gotta be some sort of story behind this. What's the deal? This is some of Chris's weirdest antics yet. Just when you think the lulcow ran dry... [[User:Abyssal|Abyssal]] 19:42, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Note that both ears are pierced, not just the gay ear (see: cucumbers on eyes pic). Also, that's his real hair and the images aren't censored; he's wearing a g-string. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 19:54, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: Are they really pierced or are they those clip on/magnet ones?? Is there anyway we can tell?? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:04, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:: They're real. Trust me. If they were clip ons, there would be more of an indent. I'm also pretty sure that clip ons are bigger. The ones I had as a kid certainly were, and I was pretty into those things. [[User:PedoforkBait|PedoforkBait]] 20:08, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::: That would make sense...I bet the ring/hoop ones are fake though, there's no hole for them in other pictures (unless he got them later). And why are they so oddly placed?? They aren't on the lobe like they should be...unless they've changed where they put them now (I got mine when I was 7). Or...could he have done them himself??? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:::: They are real. Also, I'm not aware of any way to have a stud clip-on. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 20:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
*At this point, he's gotta be fucking with us. He wants to gross us out, so we don't bother him. --[[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 20:05, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: You think he pierced his ears to get us to leave him alone? [[User:PeachyKeen|PeachyKeen]] 20:20, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

He's using a real camara to take his picture in some of these, that's unusual. I wonder what the poor guy who had to develop them was thinking. O_o [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 20:31, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

This is probably a long shot, however I really think he did this for a girl. Most likely a girl who liked to dress up as a guy and wanted Chris to do the same. Or it's a really, really good troll. Either way, whoever made him do this is really good at what they do, because these pictures are FUCKING DISGUSTING. [[User:Mikau|Mikau]] 20:54, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

The saddest thing about all this is that this didn't even suprise me in the slightest, I wasn't even mildly shocked to see Chris in drag, or even with a sock on his flacid manhood. --[[User:Gustofwind|Gustofwind]] 21:31, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: many are saying it isn't a sock...it's a g-string. You can't see the strings holding it up because of his gut roll over but when he does the picture of his butt, you can see the black thong part in the crack.....if you REALLY want to look that is. --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 21:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Goddaemnd monkey-assed hell. Well, what do we do with this page? Start describing shit? In fuckin' ''detail''?! It could stand as is, like the CWCki's own personal 'shock page'...--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 22:00, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

INFO, somebody has it. Where are the pictures from? Did he upload them somewhere? Or is it old stuff made public by trolls? --[[User:Cuprite|Cuprite]] 22:05, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:It's all recent and Clyde got it by hacking Chris' PSN. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 22:09, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::Excellent, this, coupled with the PSN being down, is probably the best chance we'll get at him returning. --[[User:Cuprite|Cuprite]] 22:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::PSN has been offline for a week all because of these photos, spread the word [[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 22:15, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:::In the meantime, someone try to find an appropreate picture of King Hippo from the Captain N cartoon; he also crossdresses, and he's also a fat, useless, discolored retard.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 22:17, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

In some of these, he looks uncannily like a fat version of Buffalo Bill. [[User:Vulture-chan|Vulture-chan]] 22:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

I was about to ask if the PSN take down made him go further down the crazy hole o_o [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

I also love the claims that he is "straight". Yeah, Chris is as straight as a circle >_> [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:34, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Talk:Tomgirl Pictures

2011-04-29T06:30:06Z

Raku:

User talk:Raku

2011-04-17T00:23:53Z

Raku: /* My time stamp is messed up */

Feel free to leave a comment, I'm loving this site =)

{{Welcome|Freecell}}

== My time stamp is messed up ==

Hey, I'm from Pennsylvania and I can not get this to match my time or location...

[[User:Raku|Raku]] 14:29, 16 April 2011 (PDT)
: I assume it's 3 hours behind your timezone then, because it's PDT (Pacific Time during Daylight Savings), whereas you're in the Eastern Timezone. My timestamp also does PDT, even though I'm in England. I'm pretty sure they're not localized because otherwise it would just be confusing to have to calculate the differences between timezones to figure out the order in which people posted. Welcome to the CWCki. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 14:36, 16 April 2011 (PDT)
: I wasn't fully satisfied with the answer I gave you, so I looked it up and the servers are based in Brea, CA, so that explains the PDT timestamps. Hope this helps. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 16:06, 16 April 2011 (PDT)
Thank you so much =) [[User:Raku|Raku]] 17:23, 16 April 2011 (PDT)

User talk:Raku

2011-04-16T21:59:08Z

Raku:

User talk:Raku

2011-04-16T21:29:03Z

Raku: /* My time stamp is messed up */

Feel free to leave a comment, I'm loving this site =)

== My time stamp is messed up ==

Hey, I'm from Pennsylvania and I can not get this to match my time or location...

[[User:Raku|Raku]] 14:29, 16 April 2011 (PDT)

User talk:Raku

2011-04-16T21:28:41Z

Raku: /* My time stamp is messed up */ new section

Feel free to leave a comment, I'm loving this site =)

== My time stamp is messed up ==

Hey, I'm from Pennsylvania and I can not get this to match my time or location...

CWCki:News

2011-04-16T21:27:25Z

Raku: /* I can not believe I missed this all until earlier this week... */

__NEWSECTIONLINK__
{{Community Portal}}

This page is for discussion of da latest update.

== Flipnote Hatena return ==

So... how many <s>days</s> <s>hours</s> minutes before he's banned? --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 04:57, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
:Well, they've been up for almost 12 hours now. He must have flown under the mod's radar. That's going to change since we're now aware of this development. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 05:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

And will we get many more badly drawn, idiotic animations? Also what is the general opinion of what we want to happen here? Do we want to report him so he will get banned again and rage, or do we want to see where he goes with this? -- [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 05:02, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
* Already reported his water maze dream. May as well to be perfectly honest. Besides, I don't think we'll get anything new, and I would love to see him rage about Flipnote Hatena Moderators for banning him because he is BAwwwwwtistic. Jump on the Pickle train, destination, Chris. [[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 02:33 25, July 2010 (UTC)

Knowing how fast Chris got banned from Flipnote Hatena(what was it, a week or two before he got perma-banned?), it will probably be even shorter. I mean, does he seriously think he can get back on and no one will notice? He's a real tool if he thinks Trolls aren't going to mess with him or report him, and an idiot if he thinks that the Moderators on FH wont notice his shenanigans and kick him right off. Also, how did he get around the ban? He must be using a library computer or something, or bought a new DS just to get around it. [[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 01:37 25, July 2010

SakuraBlossom is posting again. Apparently she had the watery maze dream too. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 06:38, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

:Any chance of a link to her channel? This sounds interesting. -- [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 07:32, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
::*http://flipnote.hatena.com/mobile/9C6792D0F3618798@DSi/ is SakuraBlossom's profile. She gave him a butt-tonne of stars just before. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 15:02, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
:::* Thanks. -- [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 15:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

'''Hey guys. Delabonte here. I don't want to have to be the one to point out the obvious but you all have Autism so here goes. How about you not report Chris this time? Haven't you realised that getting him banned from one of his few outlets is completely retarded? I know you think you're achieving something, but you are achieving the wrong thing. Think about it carefully. What was funnier, when he was making these cartoons or when he vanished and did nothing?''' --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 12:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

:Thanks for the sorely-needed message (and the protip), but I fear it may be too late as some have already taken the initiative to rat him out. Even without the dumbasses prematurely ending our fun, I'm sure it's just a matter of time until Chris gets HIMSELF in trouble with the mods. In the meantime, let's see if he catches a hold of a certain cherry flower who wants to be his heartsweet. --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 14:09, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
:*As far as we know, he hasn't responded to Sakura aside from in email. Still, it's important he not find out, or he could discover the woman who had the watery maze dream too... That would be a disaster. Also, I do agree; quit reporting him. It's funnier if/when he gets banned because of his own actions. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 15:08, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
::*Anybody who reports Chris is a moron. Also, this means he bought another DSi. And that's just sad.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 15:21, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

Update: Flipnotes previously reported to be taken down are (surprise) back up again. Oh Chris. (Hopefully this time around the trolltards won't do any reporting.) --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 01:53, 27 July 2010 (UTC)

== New tweets ==

Yeah. Chris has tweeted yet again, promoting his Sonichu Modnation crap and asking for ‘5-Star Votes’. No mention of Flipnote or anything related, though.--[[User:Hiiro|Hiiro]] 08:02, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

== Where is Chris? ==

It seems like he has been pretty inactive lately. There have been no new updates since July 26th. I wonder what he is doing. What is he up to? Any thoughts?
-Interested bystander 08/10/2010
*Chris is playing [[ModNation Racers]]. He has been for quite a while. Nothing will happen for some time. Same thing happened when he got LBP. Also, you don't have to type your name out and stuff. Just put 4 tildes (~) after your message and it will sign your post for you. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 22:35, 10 August 2010 (PDT)

This quiet spell is killing me, someone go fire a petrol bomb through his house, get some reaction.. anything! If i lived within 3 hours of him, swear to god i'd be there everyday with my camera staking him out. --[[User:Bentduck|Bentduck]] 04:47, 12 August 2010 (PDT)
:*Heh. The thing is... doing stuff that would make anyone RAEG (or at least, respond with huge amounts of emotion and anger) isn't really what's funny. The funny thing is doing [[Miyamoto|something]] [[Liquid|really]] [[Asperchu|minor]] that wouldn't phase anyone else, or would even amuse them, then watching him explode with disproportionate tard rage. There's also this tiny, niggling doubt in the back of my mind that... unless it actually hit Chris's room, or his car, or his parents raged at him for it (therefore inconveniencing him), he honestly wouldn't care. He'd just call it 'sad' or something. Chris really only cares about himself. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:59, 12 August 2010 (PDT)

Maybe Chris is still getting into stupid shit, but we're not seeing it. Maybe he was already banned from FAF for being a creep. We can't know at this point, but the possibility that we're missing out on some heavy shit is pretty frustrating. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 02:28, 15 August 2010 (PDT)

For some reason I am really interested in the whole Chris saga. I find him to be a pretty interesting person. I wish I lived near him so I could actually see him in action or actually talk to him. I tried adding him on facebook but apparently he never checks his facebook anymore. [[User:Interested bystander|Interested bystander]] 12:54, 16 August 2010 (PDT)

I swear this whole 2 year saga is like the best thing on the internet, but even so a lot of it has been dominated by quite spells. Then he'll release a new episode and in a whirlwind of shit and comeuppance he'll find his new sweetheart (I.E. any girl who dares to even acknowledge his existence, besides his mother.). Until then we just got be patient. [[User:Open the udder|Open the udder]] 15:34, 24 August 2010 (PDT)

== Not a forum crackdown ==

Given recent events, I'm starting to get pissed about people who are using CWCki as a forum. Next person to do any of the follow (list not inclusive): posting trolling plans, posting personal comments on videos (like commenting how stupid Chris is), or pretty much '''anything that is not pertaining to improvement of the article will result in temporary bans.''' If you have any questions about this, feel free to contact me. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 14:58, 17 August 2010 (PDT)
*champ, despite you being the most cwcki leader of all cwcki things, to be honest, you're not doing a very good job of enforcing this. you SHOULD call it a forum crackdown. you should call it Crackdown: The End of All Things: The Movie [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 18:29, 17 August 2010 (PDT)

== He has returned ==

Dry spell officially over? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 06:05, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

* That has still yet to be seen, but it appears so... I would, however, expect more video's soon in the immediate future given how much Chris has obsessed over his 10 year high-school reunion. When he finds out it isn't going to happen or he wasn't invited, there will definitely be some more videos (either of him crying about how the Greene County School board conspired to keep him out of the reunion, or raging against the school itself for not inviting him). Keep your eyes peeled, this high school reunion whining has the potential to become a saga in itself --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 06:10, 27 August 2010

if not the reunion this "trollbusters" alone could be another ego trip worth laughing at[[User:Mr.moose|Mr.moose]] 09:26, 27 August 2010
==Death of the Beloved PS3==
I don't understand why Chris destroyed his PS3... isn't formating the drive mean he just deleted all the data on the hard drive? I mean I realize he had a ton of shit on there but, now he has to buy a new one when he couldve just started from scratch with his old one... Anyone mind elaborating on this?[[User:Open the udder|Open the udder]] 01:21, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:This is either a gross overreaction to losing his hard drive (most of the content on which could easily be replaced, such as comics, songs, and purchased content.) or a somewhat extreme attempt at <s>re</s>gaining a social life. It actually reminds me of when I was a kid and I lost one of my Pokemon due to a trading glitch and came to the retarded conclusion that I should just wipe my entire save file. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 12:10, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:: who knows. my guess is that he will probably buy another one eventually with his tugboat
:::What about the rumors that he was trying to collect a bounty from trolls. [[User:Abyssal|Abyssal]] 22:37, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
::::Rumors and nothing more. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 06:01, 1 September 2010 (PDT)
Speaking of unsubstantiated rumors, I also heard that Chris's PSN is active again. Can anyone confirm? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 06:32, 1 September 2010 (PDT)

==Chris spotted at Fashion Square...Again.==
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34ueHWOKMh0 The guy who made the FAF vids posted this.]

Any thoughts? --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 17:13, 31 August 2010 (EST)

: He looks almost normal. Interesting... -[[User:Captainhowdy|Captainhowdy]] 14:26, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

:Same orange shirt from this weekend's second video. I wonder if he's giving up on the trucker vest. Kind of disappointing, really, in the plain old slacks and a t-shirt he just looks like a garden-variety fat dude. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 14:27, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
::Chris is seriously not aging well. The more normal he dresses, the more obvious his poor health becomes. What I see is a mass of orange filth, and from that mass, four scrawny, sickly limbs have sprouted. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 15:09, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
:::Maybe it's 'cos I live in the South. Take him out of the clown shirt and Chris isn't all that unusual down here. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 16:14, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
The way he's sitting suggests he's "spreading his plumage" just like his Captain Morgan pose with the muscle bra at FAF. He still fucking believes he's the apex of masculinity and women will flock to him if he makes himself visible. Of course, the only thing he's showcasing sitting like that is his gut and man boobs.

Should we add this to the [[Attraction Sign]] page? Same concept, Chris is just getting more and more implicit about it. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 14:38, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
:He's not becoming more implicit, he's just becoming more lazy about it. Back in 2005, he actually put a tiny degree of effort into his attraction methods. Now he's not even trying anymore. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 15:02, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
:There is no attraction sign in that video. Chris is just lusting after the chick while he sits slumped in the seat, at the height of his glory. --[[User:CaptainCanuck|CaptainCanuck]] 20:46, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

== Jerkops wanted ==

I'm looking for a few new jerkops.

Prereqs:

1) must not be a fag (homosexuals alright, I mean people who are just stupid).
2) must obsessively or at least semi-obsessively monitor the CWCki
3) must have a spine.
4) you must have been editing the CWCki for a while (in other words, I recognize your name).

Being a jerkop ''will not'' get you any special privileges. You will not get privy information about Chris. You will not get to troll Chris. You will probably not get any honor or glory. You will however get a userbox.

Contact info on my userpage.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:58, 7 September 2010 (PDT)

:ME ME ME ME ME ME [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 18:00, 7 September 2010 (PDT)
:*No. Everyone else contact me privately.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:01, 7 September 2010 (PDT)

== Chris mentioned on Atop the Fourth Wall ==

Linkara mentioned ''Sonichu'' and Chris in his latest video "15 Comics I'll Never Review", under the entry regarding webcomics. The Embodiment of the Internet showed up and forced him to review ''Sonichu'', but then settled for a ''Sonic'' comic.

The episode in question: http://atopfourthwall.blogspot.com/2010/09/top-15-comics-ill-never-review.html -- [[User:TobyMobias|TobyMobias]] 22:13, 7 September 2010 (PDT)
:I watched it earlier today and I lol'd hard when he mentioned it. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:28, 7 September 2010 (PDT)

== Any news on Chris' High School Reunion ==

Hello everyone, I'm mostly a lurker but ever since I found out about this site I couldn't help myself and dig deeper into Mr. Chandler's mind. Chris has been hell bent on trying to go to his high school reunion, hoping to meet his old gal-pals. I've been trying to find anything about Manchester High School on the internet, hoping to find anything about anyone planning a 10 year reunion. From alumniclass.com to facebook, looks like no one is planning anything or seems to care about their high school reunion. I found this on alumniclass.com, but it looks like a troll made this. [http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c381/ShinGokuIAM/Others/MHSClassReunion00.jpg] I'm going to try and keep digging but I doubt anyone cares about this high school reunion. [[User:ShinGokuIAM|ShinGokuIAM]] 07:55, 7 October 2010 (PDT)

== Laser Pointer Shit ==
This post is six months old but it hasn't been mentioned here so I thought it might be worth crossposting.

"I have witnessed Chris Chan in the flesh and he's kind of a running joke at work. He would shine his laser pointer at a woman I worked with in order to get her attention, I guess because she fit his physical criteria, except that she was not boyfriend-free." ''-Komet, Something Awful Forums''

[[User:V3N0M1300|V3N0M1300]] 19:56, 10 December 2010 (PST)

== Is this the end? ==
We haven't heard anything from Chris since November. Unless we somehow find a way to troll him through the PSN, could this be the end of the trolling as we know it? [[User:Tyranogre|Tyranogre]] 22:11, 14 January 2011 (PST)

:Chris will always come back to the internet. Once he realizes nobody will ever love him in real life, he'll come back to the internet, thus allowing us to troll him. I'm pretty sure he'll go back to being stupid(er). Although he probably won't put effort into a sweetheart. [[User:PedoforkBait|PedoforkBait]] 16:40, 10 January 2011 (PST)

== Want to see Chris in public ==

Head out to the fashion square mall on a saturday between 3-4. Being the autistic creature of habit he is, he always shows up, with Bob.
[[User:CFA|CFA]] 16:00, 23 January 2011 (PST)CFA

== CWCki captioning side project ==

There's a lot of talented people on the CWCki and since not a lot is going on with Chris, we can use this time to really do something terrific. One thing I think we can work on is assisting our sister project, [[TheCWCvilleLibrary]] with captioning. I was able to make one for [[MEOW]] and it turned out fine.

Captioning videos isn't too difficult, I used [http://accessify.com/tools-and-wizards/accessibility-tools/easy-youtube-caption-creator/ this] though I hear [http://captiontube.appspot.com/ this] is a good resource as well. You can use CWCki transcripts for the captions and otherwise it's not too difficult.

Helping out with this means that the hearing impaired can now experience the fail that is Chris, in addition to people who want to watch Chris's videos without hearing Chris's voice. This can also lead to translating Chris's videos into other languages.

Participation means getting your name mention in the video description and you'll get a pretty cool user box (TBD). The more you contribute, the cooler user boxes you'll get.

Send your captions (upload them to MediaFire or some site like that) and message them to Abuelita on TheCWCvilleLibrary. Be sure you mention your CWCki name so you can get credit and so I can get you a sweet ass userbox.

I plan on contributing myself, so by all means participate.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:41, 7 February 2011 (PST)
*Just to bring it to your attention, both of those links are the same. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 10:28, 8 February 2011 (PST)
:*NUH-UH.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:54, 8 February 2011 (PST)
*I started doing the Chris's DVD videos (just to follow the channel's order), I could translate them to Spanish too.[[User:Cesare|Cesare]] 15:03, 8 February 2011 (PST)
**I should probably say that I did the JenkinsJinkies application video and Hello Juffalo/Downs with the Clowns, just so that nobody else does them a second time. Should we have a separate page cataloging which videos have been done by who? [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 15:07, 8 February 2011 (PST)
::*I wasn't sure if we should make this a separate CWCki project but it might be handy. Post which videos you plan on working on [[CWCki:Caption Crusade|here]]. If you can translate Chris's into Spanish, that'd be great Cesare.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:37, 8 February 2011 (PST)

== Inside the Pickle Suit is canceled ==

Due to lack of interest by relevant parties, the project is canceled. The interview with Ivy will still go on (as we've already paid the seance and the deposit was non-refundable). If you wanna bitch, go to [[IRC]] and bitch to the people who opted out. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:52, 9 February 2011 (PST)
*Though to be fair, the issue of in-character versus out of character discussion, essentially trolls breaking the fourth wall in the theatrics of Chris would be a difficult issue to reconcile .--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:08, 9 February 2011 (PST)

I don't blame them if they don't want to do it. There's no pressure, and I respect the people behind the scenes too much for them to risk giving away personal details or revelations that could end up backfiring on them. Lord knows no one needs to give Chris anything of value(however small), better to be safe than sorry. I say let sleeping dogs lye. --[[Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 05:29 10, February 2011 (EST)

Agreed. --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 08:12, 10 February 2011 (PST)

== NeverOnHexBox ==

I'm sure some of you might have seen this already, I was surprised it wasn't on the CWCki, but Chris is back on under a new Youtube Channel. Here, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pu75tzrwLAU, you just have to see it for yourself. I swear, the internet and video games are Chris' Heroin and Cocaine. --[[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 01:49, 14 February 2011 (EST)
*That's not Chris, that's just someone posting videos of his levels. --[[User:KHSilverRock|KHSilverRock]] 23:02, 13 February 2011 (PST)
* Either way, it counts as being back in my books. --[[user:Chris_pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 02:16, 13 February 2011 (EST)

== Back on MySpace? ==

Chris's [[MySpace]] showed a recent login on 26 [[February 2011]]. Some notable edits show that he's now even more picky when it comes to his courtship expectations: "You must be pretty, single, and willing to meet me and my papa at Casa De Chandler with[in] two days of first contact." He also seems to be taking a different view towards [[jerks]]: "I am also open to friendships with Guys; for many years I shunned men because of how they treated me but now I am cool with being friends with them."

Now this may be a troll and not him, but if it is him, is this something worth noting on [[Template:Da_update|Da Update]] or something? Maybe note the changes on the page about his MySpace? [[User:BrianBash|BrianBash]] 03:24, 26 February 2011 (PST)

Well, we should look a little further into this before jumping to conclusions. It's pretty easy to hack a Myspace account, and if it's one owned by Chris, then it's even easier to take. Not only that, his Myspace has been inactive for a pretty long time. The message sounds like something Chris would say, but this can be imitated as we know.

This is the first time since he left that there's been any sort of major signs from him on the internet, if he is trying to get back into his internet crawl spaces, he's certainly trying to be a little more discreet about it, and posting this as an update on the CWCki might scare him away if he see's it(since he checks the CWCki), so perhaps a little causion is needed. I'll check this out though. --[[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 02:31, 28, February 2011 (EST)

It's a decent impression if it's not him. [[User:Eamoo|Eamoo]] 09:46, 28 February 2011 (PST)

*It's not Chris, I'll tell you that much. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:42, 28 February 2011 (PST)

== I can not believe I missed this all until earlier this week... ==

So it wasn't until a youtube partner known as BLACKbusterCritic posted a [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSMWckfTfuM video] on him that I learned of CWC's existence... It's so funny that I was able to live in ignorance for so long... Anyway, I am so upset that I missed this all because there is so much information out there, and I want to learn it all.

I hope Chris comes back, I need some more humor in my life.

Keep doing a good job on the site, I am so sad to see ED is down... Hoping that site also comes back.

[[User:Raku|Raku]] 14:27, 16 April 2011 (PDT)

CWCki:News

2011-04-16T21:26:13Z

Raku: /* I can not believe I missed this all until earlier this week... */

CWCki:News

2011-04-16T21:25:55Z

Raku: /* I can not believe I missed this all until earlier this week... */

User talk:Raku

2011-04-16T21:16:36Z

Raku: Created page with "Feel free to leave a comment, I'm loving this site =)"

Feel free to leave a comment, I'm loving this site =)

User:Raku

2011-04-16T21:15:46Z

Raku: Created page with "Can not believe he missed all of this, hoping for more humor"

Can not believe he missed all of this, hoping for more humor

CWCki:News

2011-04-16T21:10:46Z

Raku: /* I can not believe I missed this all until earlier this week... */ new section

__NEWSECTIONLINK__
{{Community Portal}}

This page is for discussion of da latest update.

== Flipnote Hatena return ==

So... how many <s>days</s> <s>hours</s> minutes before he's banned? --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 04:57, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
:Well, they've been up for almost 12 hours now. He must have flown under the mod's radar. That's going to change since we're now aware of this development. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 05:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

And will we get many more badly drawn, idiotic animations? Also what is the general opinion of what we want to happen here? Do we want to report him so he will get banned again and rage, or do we want to see where he goes with this? -- [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 05:02, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
* Already reported his water maze dream. May as well to be perfectly honest. Besides, I don't think we'll get anything new, and I would love to see him rage about Flipnote Hatena Moderators for banning him because he is BAwwwwwtistic. Jump on the Pickle train, destination, Chris. [[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 02:33 25, July 2010 (UTC)

Knowing how fast Chris got banned from Flipnote Hatena(what was it, a week or two before he got perma-banned?), it will probably be even shorter. I mean, does he seriously think he can get back on and no one will notice? He's a real tool if he thinks Trolls aren't going to mess with him or report him, and an idiot if he thinks that the Moderators on FH wont notice his shenanigans and kick him right off. Also, how did he get around the ban? He must be using a library computer or something, or bought a new DS just to get around it. [[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 01:37 25, July 2010

SakuraBlossom is posting again. Apparently she had the watery maze dream too. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 06:38, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

:Any chance of a link to her channel? This sounds interesting. -- [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 07:32, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
::*http://flipnote.hatena.com/mobile/9C6792D0F3618798@DSi/ is SakuraBlossom's profile. She gave him a butt-tonne of stars just before. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 15:02, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
:::* Thanks. -- [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 15:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

'''Hey guys. Delabonte here. I don't want to have to be the one to point out the obvious but you all have Autism so here goes. How about you not report Chris this time? Haven't you realised that getting him banned from one of his few outlets is completely retarded? I know you think you're achieving something, but you are achieving the wrong thing. Think about it carefully. What was funnier, when he was making these cartoons or when he vanished and did nothing?''' --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 12:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

:Thanks for the sorely-needed message (and the protip), but I fear it may be too late as some have already taken the initiative to rat him out. Even without the dumbasses prematurely ending our fun, I'm sure it's just a matter of time until Chris gets HIMSELF in trouble with the mods. In the meantime, let's see if he catches a hold of a certain cherry flower who wants to be his heartsweet. --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 14:09, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
:*As far as we know, he hasn't responded to Sakura aside from in email. Still, it's important he not find out, or he could discover the woman who had the watery maze dream too... That would be a disaster. Also, I do agree; quit reporting him. It's funnier if/when he gets banned because of his own actions. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 15:08, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
::*Anybody who reports Chris is a moron. Also, this means he bought another DSi. And that's just sad.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 15:21, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

Update: Flipnotes previously reported to be taken down are (surprise) back up again. Oh Chris. (Hopefully this time around the trolltards won't do any reporting.) --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 01:53, 27 July 2010 (UTC)

== New tweets ==

Yeah. Chris has tweeted yet again, promoting his Sonichu Modnation crap and asking for ‘5-Star Votes’. No mention of Flipnote or anything related, though.--[[User:Hiiro|Hiiro]] 08:02, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

== Where is Chris? ==

It seems like he has been pretty inactive lately. There have been no new updates since July 26th. I wonder what he is doing. What is he up to? Any thoughts?
-Interested bystander 08/10/2010
*Chris is playing [[ModNation Racers]]. He has been for quite a while. Nothing will happen for some time. Same thing happened when he got LBP. Also, you don't have to type your name out and stuff. Just put 4 tildes (~) after your message and it will sign your post for you. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 22:35, 10 August 2010 (PDT)

This quiet spell is killing me, someone go fire a petrol bomb through his house, get some reaction.. anything! If i lived within 3 hours of him, swear to god i'd be there everyday with my camera staking him out. --[[User:Bentduck|Bentduck]] 04:47, 12 August 2010 (PDT)
:*Heh. The thing is... doing stuff that would make anyone RAEG (or at least, respond with huge amounts of emotion and anger) isn't really what's funny. The funny thing is doing [[Miyamoto|something]] [[Liquid|really]] [[Asperchu|minor]] that wouldn't phase anyone else, or would even amuse them, then watching him explode with disproportionate tard rage. There's also this tiny, niggling doubt in the back of my mind that... unless it actually hit Chris's room, or his car, or his parents raged at him for it (therefore inconveniencing him), he honestly wouldn't care. He'd just call it 'sad' or something. Chris really only cares about himself. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:59, 12 August 2010 (PDT)

Maybe Chris is still getting into stupid shit, but we're not seeing it. Maybe he was already banned from FAF for being a creep. We can't know at this point, but the possibility that we're missing out on some heavy shit is pretty frustrating. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 02:28, 15 August 2010 (PDT)

For some reason I am really interested in the whole Chris saga. I find him to be a pretty interesting person. I wish I lived near him so I could actually see him in action or actually talk to him. I tried adding him on facebook but apparently he never checks his facebook anymore. [[User:Interested bystander|Interested bystander]] 12:54, 16 August 2010 (PDT)

I swear this whole 2 year saga is like the best thing on the internet, but even so a lot of it has been dominated by quite spells. Then he'll release a new episode and in a whirlwind of shit and comeuppance he'll find his new sweetheart (I.E. any girl who dares to even acknowledge his existence, besides his mother.). Until then we just got be patient. [[User:Open the udder|Open the udder]] 15:34, 24 August 2010 (PDT)

== Not a forum crackdown ==

Given recent events, I'm starting to get pissed about people who are using CWCki as a forum. Next person to do any of the follow (list not inclusive): posting trolling plans, posting personal comments on videos (like commenting how stupid Chris is), or pretty much '''anything that is not pertaining to improvement of the article will result in temporary bans.''' If you have any questions about this, feel free to contact me. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 14:58, 17 August 2010 (PDT)
*champ, despite you being the most cwcki leader of all cwcki things, to be honest, you're not doing a very good job of enforcing this. you SHOULD call it a forum crackdown. you should call it Crackdown: The End of All Things: The Movie [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 18:29, 17 August 2010 (PDT)

== He has returned ==

Dry spell officially over? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 06:05, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

* That has still yet to be seen, but it appears so... I would, however, expect more video's soon in the immediate future given how much Chris has obsessed over his 10 year high-school reunion. When he finds out it isn't going to happen or he wasn't invited, there will definitely be some more videos (either of him crying about how the Greene County School board conspired to keep him out of the reunion, or raging against the school itself for not inviting him). Keep your eyes peeled, this high school reunion whining has the potential to become a saga in itself --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 06:10, 27 August 2010

if not the reunion this "trollbusters" alone could be another ego trip worth laughing at[[User:Mr.moose|Mr.moose]] 09:26, 27 August 2010
==Death of the Beloved PS3==
I don't understand why Chris destroyed his PS3... isn't formating the drive mean he just deleted all the data on the hard drive? I mean I realize he had a ton of shit on there but, now he has to buy a new one when he couldve just started from scratch with his old one... Anyone mind elaborating on this?[[User:Open the udder|Open the udder]] 01:21, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:This is either a gross overreaction to losing his hard drive (most of the content on which could easily be replaced, such as comics, songs, and purchased content.) or a somewhat extreme attempt at <s>re</s>gaining a social life. It actually reminds me of when I was a kid and I lost one of my Pokemon due to a trading glitch and came to the retarded conclusion that I should just wipe my entire save file. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 12:10, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:: who knows. my guess is that he will probably buy another one eventually with his tugboat
:::What about the rumors that he was trying to collect a bounty from trolls. [[User:Abyssal|Abyssal]] 22:37, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
::::Rumors and nothing more. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 06:01, 1 September 2010 (PDT)
Speaking of unsubstantiated rumors, I also heard that Chris's PSN is active again. Can anyone confirm? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 06:32, 1 September 2010 (PDT)

==Chris spotted at Fashion Square...Again.==
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34ueHWOKMh0 The guy who made the FAF vids posted this.]

Any thoughts? --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 17:13, 31 August 2010 (EST)

: He looks almost normal. Interesting... -[[User:Captainhowdy|Captainhowdy]] 14:26, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

:Same orange shirt from this weekend's second video. I wonder if he's giving up on the trucker vest. Kind of disappointing, really, in the plain old slacks and a t-shirt he just looks like a garden-variety fat dude. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 14:27, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
::Chris is seriously not aging well. The more normal he dresses, the more obvious his poor health becomes. What I see is a mass of orange filth, and from that mass, four scrawny, sickly limbs have sprouted. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 15:09, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
:::Maybe it's 'cos I live in the South. Take him out of the clown shirt and Chris isn't all that unusual down here. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 16:14, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
The way he's sitting suggests he's "spreading his plumage" just like his Captain Morgan pose with the muscle bra at FAF. He still fucking believes he's the apex of masculinity and women will flock to him if he makes himself visible. Of course, the only thing he's showcasing sitting like that is his gut and man boobs.

Should we add this to the [[Attraction Sign]] page? Same concept, Chris is just getting more and more implicit about it. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 14:38, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
:He's not becoming more implicit, he's just becoming more lazy about it. Back in 2005, he actually put a tiny degree of effort into his attraction methods. Now he's not even trying anymore. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 15:02, 31 August 2010 (PDT)
:There is no attraction sign in that video. Chris is just lusting after the chick while he sits slumped in the seat, at the height of his glory. --[[User:CaptainCanuck|CaptainCanuck]] 20:46, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

== Jerkops wanted ==

I'm looking for a few new jerkops.

Prereqs:

1) must not be a fag (homosexuals alright, I mean people who are just stupid).
2) must obsessively or at least semi-obsessively monitor the CWCki
3) must have a spine.
4) you must have been editing the CWCki for a while (in other words, I recognize your name).

Being a jerkop ''will not'' get you any special privileges. You will not get privy information about Chris. You will not get to troll Chris. You will probably not get any honor or glory. You will however get a userbox.

Contact info on my userpage.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:58, 7 September 2010 (PDT)

:ME ME ME ME ME ME [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 18:00, 7 September 2010 (PDT)
:*No. Everyone else contact me privately.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:01, 7 September 2010 (PDT)

== Chris mentioned on Atop the Fourth Wall ==

Linkara mentioned ''Sonichu'' and Chris in his latest video "15 Comics I'll Never Review", under the entry regarding webcomics. The Embodiment of the Internet showed up and forced him to review ''Sonichu'', but then settled for a ''Sonic'' comic.

The episode in question: http://atopfourthwall.blogspot.com/2010/09/top-15-comics-ill-never-review.html -- [[User:TobyMobias|TobyMobias]] 22:13, 7 September 2010 (PDT)
:I watched it earlier today and I lol'd hard when he mentioned it. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:28, 7 September 2010 (PDT)

== Any news on Chris' High School Reunion ==

Hello everyone, I'm mostly a lurker but ever since I found out about this site I couldn't help myself and dig deeper into Mr. Chandler's mind. Chris has been hell bent on trying to go to his high school reunion, hoping to meet his old gal-pals. I've been trying to find anything about Manchester High School on the internet, hoping to find anything about anyone planning a 10 year reunion. From alumniclass.com to facebook, looks like no one is planning anything or seems to care about their high school reunion. I found this on alumniclass.com, but it looks like a troll made this. [http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c381/ShinGokuIAM/Others/MHSClassReunion00.jpg] I'm going to try and keep digging but I doubt anyone cares about this high school reunion. [[User:ShinGokuIAM|ShinGokuIAM]] 07:55, 7 October 2010 (PDT)

== Laser Pointer Shit ==
This post is six months old but it hasn't been mentioned here so I thought it might be worth crossposting.

"I have witnessed Chris Chan in the flesh and he's kind of a running joke at work. He would shine his laser pointer at a woman I worked with in order to get her attention, I guess because she fit his physical criteria, except that she was not boyfriend-free." ''-Komet, Something Awful Forums''

[[User:V3N0M1300|V3N0M1300]] 19:56, 10 December 2010 (PST)

== Is this the end? ==
We haven't heard anything from Chris since November. Unless we somehow find a way to troll him through the PSN, could this be the end of the trolling as we know it? [[User:Tyranogre|Tyranogre]] 22:11, 14 January 2011 (PST)

:Chris will always come back to the internet. Once he realizes nobody will ever love him in real life, he'll come back to the internet, thus allowing us to troll him. I'm pretty sure he'll go back to being stupid(er). Although he probably won't put effort into a sweetheart. [[User:PedoforkBait|PedoforkBait]] 16:40, 10 January 2011 (PST)

== Want to see Chris in public ==

Head out to the fashion square mall on a saturday between 3-4. Being the autistic creature of habit he is, he always shows up, with Bob.
[[User:CFA|CFA]] 16:00, 23 January 2011 (PST)CFA

== CWCki captioning side project ==

There's a lot of talented people on the CWCki and since not a lot is going on with Chris, we can use this time to really do something terrific. One thing I think we can work on is assisting our sister project, [[TheCWCvilleLibrary]] with captioning. I was able to make one for [[MEOW]] and it turned out fine.

Captioning videos isn't too difficult, I used [http://accessify.com/tools-and-wizards/accessibility-tools/easy-youtube-caption-creator/ this] though I hear [http://captiontube.appspot.com/ this] is a good resource as well. You can use CWCki transcripts for the captions and otherwise it's not too difficult.

Helping out with this means that the hearing impaired can now experience the fail that is Chris, in addition to people who want to watch Chris's videos without hearing Chris's voice. This can also lead to translating Chris's videos into other languages.

Participation means getting your name mention in the video description and you'll get a pretty cool user box (TBD). The more you contribute, the cooler user boxes you'll get.

Send your captions (upload them to MediaFire or some site like that) and message them to Abuelita on TheCWCvilleLibrary. Be sure you mention your CWCki name so you can get credit and so I can get you a sweet ass userbox.

I plan on contributing myself, so by all means participate.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:41, 7 February 2011 (PST)
*Just to bring it to your attention, both of those links are the same. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 10:28, 8 February 2011 (PST)
:*NUH-UH.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:54, 8 February 2011 (PST)
*I started doing the Chris's DVD videos (just to follow the channel's order), I could translate them to Spanish too.[[User:Cesare|Cesare]] 15:03, 8 February 2011 (PST)
**I should probably say that I did the JenkinsJinkies application video and Hello Juffalo/Downs with the Clowns, just so that nobody else does them a second time. Should we have a separate page cataloging which videos have been done by who? [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 15:07, 8 February 2011 (PST)
::*I wasn't sure if we should make this a separate CWCki project but it might be handy. Post which videos you plan on working on [[CWCki:Caption Crusade|here]]. If you can translate Chris's into Spanish, that'd be great Cesare.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:37, 8 February 2011 (PST)

== Inside the Pickle Suit is canceled ==

Due to lack of interest by relevant parties, the project is canceled. The interview with Ivy will still go on (as we've already paid the seance and the deposit was non-refundable). If you wanna bitch, go to [[IRC]] and bitch to the people who opted out. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:52, 9 February 2011 (PST)
*Though to be fair, the issue of in-character versus out of character discussion, essentially trolls breaking the fourth wall in the theatrics of Chris would be a difficult issue to reconcile .--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:08, 9 February 2011 (PST)

I don't blame them if they don't want to do it. There's no pressure, and I respect the people behind the scenes too much for them to risk giving away personal details or revelations that could end up backfiring on them. Lord knows no one needs to give Chris anything of value(however small), better to be safe than sorry. I say let sleeping dogs lye. --[[Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 05:29 10, February 2011 (EST)

Agreed. --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 08:12, 10 February 2011 (PST)

== NeverOnHexBox ==

I'm sure some of you might have seen this already, I was surprised it wasn't on the CWCki, but Chris is back on under a new Youtube Channel. Here, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pu75tzrwLAU, you just have to see it for yourself. I swear, the internet and video games are Chris' Heroin and Cocaine. --[[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 01:49, 14 February 2011 (EST)
*That's not Chris, that's just someone posting videos of his levels. --[[User:KHSilverRock|KHSilverRock]] 23:02, 13 February 2011 (PST)
* Either way, it counts as being back in my books. --[[user:Chris_pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 02:16, 13 February 2011 (EST)

== Back on MySpace? ==

Chris's [[MySpace]] showed a recent login on 26 [[February 2011]]. Some notable edits show that he's now even more picky when it comes to his courtship expectations: "You must be pretty, single, and willing to meet me and my papa at Casa De Chandler with[in] two days of first contact." He also seems to be taking a different view towards [[jerks]]: "I am also open to friendships with Guys; for many years I shunned men because of how they treated me but now I am cool with being friends with them."

Now this may be a troll and not him, but if it is him, is this something worth noting on [[Template:Da_update|Da Update]] or something? Maybe note the changes on the page about his MySpace? [[User:BrianBash|BrianBash]] 03:24, 26 February 2011 (PST)

Well, we should look a little further into this before jumping to conclusions. It's pretty easy to hack a Myspace account, and if it's one owned by Chris, then it's even easier to take. Not only that, his Myspace has been inactive for a pretty long time. The message sounds like something Chris would say, but this can be imitated as we know.

This is the first time since he left that there's been any sort of major signs from him on the internet, if he is trying to get back into his internet crawl spaces, he's certainly trying to be a little more discreet about it, and posting this as an update on the CWCki might scare him away if he see's it(since he checks the CWCki), so perhaps a little causion is needed. I'll check this out though. --[[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 02:31, 28, February 2011 (EST)

It's a decent impression if it's not him. [[User:Eamoo|Eamoo]] 09:46, 28 February 2011 (PST)

*It's not Chris, I'll tell you that much. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:42, 28 February 2011 (PST)

== I can not believe I missed this all until earlier this week... ==

So it wasn't until a youtube partner known as BLACKbusterCritic posted a video[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSMWckfTfuM] on him that I learned of CWC's existence... It's so funny that I was able to live in ignorance for so long... Anyway, I am so upset that I missed this all because there is so much information out there, and I want to learn it all.

I hope Chris comes back, I need some more humor in my life.

Keep doing a good job on the site, I am so sad to see ED is down... Hoping that site also comes back.

[[User:Raku|Raku]] 14:10, 16 April 2011 (PDT)