CWCki - User contributions [en]

Talk:CWC Address to Unilever About AXE

2012-10-14T21:14:23Z

Rrosai: /* Atheist Experience? */

{{rainbow|I LOL'D}}

This is the first video that made laugh in a long time. He's so threatened. I'll write up a little something tomorrow; depending on my stress. Oh, and we need to add the robe of homosexuality to [[Chris and fashion]] --[[User:Jump|Jump]] 05:04, 2 May 2009 (CEST)

You tell them CWC! And tell those homos to stop using up our water, electricity and to stop going to the grocery store and buying our GODDAMN bread! On a serious note, what does Chris want them to do? Buy homosexual-only body spray? Oh wait, that'd be promoting homosexuality and Chris would be pissed that he'd be discriminated against. I, Wild Sonichu, the TRUE AND ORIGINAL openly bisexual Sonichu, encourage all homosexuals to buy Axe. --[[User:Wild Sonichu|Wild Sonichu]] 23:10, 2 May 2009 (CEST)

* I'm a genderqueer and I use the Dark Temptation AXE. I note he didn't address the T part of LGBT, though, so I'm still cool, right? ...But in all seriousness, AXE smells pretty chemical and terrible unless you only use a quick puff of it, which I highly doubt he's doing. I picture wavy air from the alcohol fumes about him, as well as the body stench he's attempting to cover. [[User:BubblegumPinkButler|BubblegumPinkButler]] 06:42, 3 May 2009 (CEST)

==Gay ad==
I had to look it up to make sure I remembered it correctly, but there is indeed a gay AXE ad.
<center>{{#ev:youtube|qSjATv1dwIE}}</center>
Someone show this to him, guys. [[User:BubblegumPinkButler|BubblegumPinkButler]] 01:53, 4 May 2009 (CEST)

== Bob ==

Do we know if Bob Chandler, the famous lumberjack, uses AXE as his body spray of choice? --[[User:Great Briton|Great Briton]] 14:31, 25 July 2009 (CEST)

== A Parody Video ==

Realizing this is shameless self-promotion, but could we post this video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RxTycDxwqY) on the page like we now do with other parody videos?
--[[User:Manwithoutabody|manwithoutabody]] 23:41, 23 March 2010 (CEST)

== What's with the blaghs? ==

just edited out some "Blaghs" in the text for the video. Who put those there anyway? -Icetailgreg

== Atheist Experience? ==

In episode 618 from 1:21:30 or so, is this guy talking about our hero? He does say the axe is "two different videos.[[User:Rrosai|Rrosai]] 14:14, 14 October 2012 (PDT)

Talk:CWC Address to Unilever About AXE

2012-10-14T21:13:50Z

Rrosai:

File:Japchu.jpg

2012-08-13T10:07:25Z

Rrosai:

From [[JK Productions]]' late Sonichu game blog, which was located at http://sonichugame.blogspot.com/.

The Japanese writing reads, "こいつは黄色い。 (This guy is yellow.)" "見た目は中国から出そうなソニック偽者。 (He looks like a fake Sonic that might come from China.)"

Salvaged from http://www.sendspace.com/file/zz085p

[[Category:Sonichu fan art]]

File:Japchu.jpg

2012-08-13T10:07:19Z

Rrosai:

From [[JK Productions]]' late Sonichu game blog, which was located at http://sonichugame.blogspot.com/.

The Japanese writing reads, "こいつは黄色い。 (This guy is yellow.)" "見た目は中国から出そうなソニック偽者。 (He looks like a fake sonic that might come from China.)"

Salvaged from http://www.sendspace.com/file/zz085p

[[Category:Sonichu fan art]]

Bob Chandler

2012-08-13T07:26:45Z

Rrosai:

: ''"Bob" redirects here. For the troll occasionally known as Bob, see [[Robert Simmons V]].''
{{Articleofthenow}}

{{quote|It was an interesting life I had.|Bob, at peace.}}
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | Chandler family
|-
| colspan="2" | [[Image:Chrischansdad.jpg|300px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Bob Chandler
|-
| '''Birth name'''
| Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.
|-
| '''Nicknames'''
| [[Bob Walks In|Internet Lumberjack]]
[[Cole|[That fuck] Bob]]
|-
| '''Born'''
| 4 September [[Pre-1980#1920s|1927]]
|-
| '''Died'''
| 6 September [[2011]] (aged 84)
|-
| '''Gender'''
| Male
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| White (1/4th [[Cherokee]]<ref name="About">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>)
|-
| '''Marriage'''
| Patricia (c.1960-????) 
[[Barb]] (1980-2011)
|-
| '''Children'''
| Dr. David Alan Chandler 
Carol Suzanne Chandler 
[[Christian Weston Chandler]]
|-
| '''Parents'''
| Robert Franklin Chandler Sr. (father) Jean Holloman (mother)
|-
| '''Education'''
| Auburn University (engineering)
|-
| '''Occupation(s)'''
| Military communications, engineer
|-
|}
'''Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.'''<ref>[[Blanca E-mails#Chris likes Blanca|Email to Blanca]]</ref> (4 September [[Pre-1980#1920s|1927]]- 6 September [[2011]] <ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html#P155</ref>) was the father of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], [[Carol Chandler]] and [[David Alan Chandler]], and husband of [[Barbara Weston Chandler]]. Bob became a firm favorite with [[trolls]] due to Chris's intense dislike of him and Bob's infamous cameo when he walked in on Chris [[mass debating]].<ref>[[Bob Walks In]]</ref> His nickname, "the [[Internet]] Lumberjack," comes from this incident.

While loathed by and estranged from his other children and step-child, Bob was still viewed as a better parent than his wife [[Barbara]], due to him being somewhat concerned with Chris's status as a [[virgin with rage]], and the fact that he occasionally tried to guilt him into being more considerate by bringing up the fact that he devoted 29 years to raising a selfish manchild. Of course, Chris was unfazed by these attempts.

Bob conversed with numerous trolls. A lot of information was gained from these chats, mostly due to his tendency to yammer on.

Bob died on 6 September 2011, at Martha Jefferson Hospital ICU surrounded by family, pastor and hospital staff.<ref name="BobObit">http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600</ref> Bob is presumably spending the afterlife in [[Chris and Religion|Heaven]]- mostly cutting down the [[Chris and the Internet|internet connections]] of other blessed souls, but also occasionally taking the time to haunt the [[Dreams|nightmares]] of Chris's [[Trolls|enemies]], much like his [[Patti|deceased childhood pet.]]

==Biography==
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|"I seen crosses burnin', fella."]]

Bob was born in [[Wikipedia:Fort Worth, Texas|Fort Worth, Texas]]<ref name="Prank calls">[[Prank calls]]</ref> and raised in [[Wikipedia:Alabama|Alabama]].<ref name="About">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#About Bob (7:18 - 16:45)]]</ref> He was the first child of Robert Franklin Chandler Sr. (1906<ref>https://familysearch.org/pal:/MM9.1.1/H5S7-BZM</ref>-????), an Insurance Agent from Alabama, and Jean Holloman (1906<ref>https://familysearch.org/pal:/MM9.1.1/H5S7-12M</ref>-????), a Housewife from Texas.<ref>http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m2y47mWzzz1qblvg5o1_1280.jpg</ref>

Bob had been interested in the world around him since he was 10, and began collecting foreign stamps as a child in the [[1930s]]. He also developed an interested in foreign music, and eventually collected 15,000–20,000 LPs from various genres and cultures.<ref name="PSN 37"/>

===Service and education===
Bob was drafted after [[Wikipedia:World War II|World War II]] and placed in [[Wikipedia:Signal Corps (United States Army)|the Signal Corps]]. There, he learned how to install valve systems, switchboards, and telephones, and got to visit the beautiful [[CWCville|North Korea]]. When he got out, he couldn't get a job and so went to college on the [[Wikipedia:G.I. Bill|G.I. Bill]].<ref name="About" />

Since he figured he'd get "swallowed up" at a big college, Bob picked a small college to study pre-Engineering for two years. He was also in a band and learned a lot about [[music]]. He then moved onto [[Wikipedia:Auburn University|Auburn University]], a big college, to earn a type of engineering degree, although it's never specified (mechanical, electrical etc.).<ref name="About" /> As an engineer, he never learned to spell properly.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#The Date Begins (4:47 - 7:17)]]</ref>

===Career===
Bob worked for [[Wikipedia:Western Electric|Western Electric]] for forty years. Using skills learned in the Army, he built for the company their first automatic [something] (it's unclear what Bob says here). General Electric heard about it and offered him a job in upstate New York. Since New York is too cold (and Yankee) for Bob, he moved away after three years, working in North Carolina for some time.<ref name="About" /> He worked with both Goodrich and Goodyear.<ref name="PSN 37" />

With General Electric, Bob was responsible for at least seven patents. [[Barbara]] claimed, in an e-mail to [[Miyamoto]], that without Bob's influence in the computer world, the [[Wikipedia:Nintendo Entertainment System|NES]] "might not have arrived so soon" (despite video game technology actually being pioneered by [[Wikipedia:Ralph Baer|Ralph Baer]]).<ref name="Barbara" />

As examples of Bob's accom-PLISH-ments, as Chris would say, he automated a steel mill for rolling steel for cars, a paper mill for papers into the form of Kleenex, warehousing, railroads and tanker ships. He designed scooters, die casting machines, machines for producing plastic products<ref name="About" /> and a [http://www.google.com/patents/about?id=PIU_AAAAEBAJ vehicle logging system]. A fact that both Chris and Barbara have bragged about is that Bob designed [http://www.google.com/patents/about?id=vScrAAAAEBAJ controls] that were used in plastic water container molding machines.<ref name="About" /><ref name="Barbara">[[Miyamoto Saga#Barbara]]</ref>

Bob himself was proud of his "natural inclination for logic," although he was "inundated" by all his designs and whether he did good for the world.<ref name="About" />

===World consciousness===
[[Image:0012-BobbyReading.jpg|thumb|Bob learning how to cut that Internet down]]

Politically, Bob identified as a [[Wikipedia:Republican Party (United States)|Republican]], and did not vote for [[Barack Obama]] in [[Wikipedia:United States presidential election, 2008|the 2008 presidential election]].<ref name="Prank calls"/>

In a potentially damaging moment on 18 [[February 2009]], Bob doubted the existence of [[Molvanîa]], [[Julie]]'s country of origin.<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]]</ref> However, he continued talking under the assumption that Molvanîa was under Russian control.<ref name="PSN 37">[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7]]</ref>

===Later life and poor health===
[[Image:LumberjackTapestry.JPG|thumb|Robert had Medieval English ancestry]]

Bob lived on social security and his General Electric pension.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref> He never really had people to chat with (he loved to ramble if the person showed some slight interest), so he sat around, listened to music, and took care of the garden inside the greenhouse.<ref name="PSN 37" /> With a 1970s stereo system set up in the greenhouse, he went to "swing with the music" on his swing there.<ref name="Raising" />

Bob had had two triple bypasses and four heart attacks. He wore an [[Wikipedia:Artificial pacemaker|artificial pacemaker]].<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref> In one prank call, Bob revealed that after surgery for cancer it was discovered that he had a fluid build up in his legs, which is symptomatic of heart failure. This rapid decline in health worried him.<ref name="Prank calls"/> He attributed his long life to the [[Cherokee]] in him. His uncles and grandfather all lived past 90.<ref name="PSN 37" />

On 1 [[March 2010]], Chris [[Twitter]]ed that Bob had been taken to the hospital in the early morning for "congested [''sic''] [[Wikipedia:Heart failure|heart failure]]". Chris seemed confident that his father would come home shortly. Considering Bob's age, lifestyle, and long history of heart disease, [[Chris and death|Chris did not seem to grasp the seriousness of heart failure in an elderly man]]. Bob had been the only thing keeping [[14 Branchland Court|the Chandler household]] from imploding, and as such, trolls and white knights alike wished him the very best.

[[Image:Bobbed.jpg|thumb|Apart from the dying heart]]

In the month following Bob's hospitalization, Chris was remarkably quiet on the subject of his father. Information about his condition was hard to come by, as we only learned something [[Ego|once it has inconvenienced Chris enough for him to come online and complain about it]]. Statistically, congestive heart failure is not as immediately fatal as its name implies.<ref>[[Wikipedia:Congenital Heart Failure|Congenital Heart Failure]]</ref> But again, Bob's age, prior heart attacks and lifestyle made this a serious matter.

Chris's videos over the month of March made no mention of Bob at all. Staying true to his painfully predictable nature, Chris instead lost a [[The Wallflower|girlfriend he never had]], [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|made racial slurs and death threats to a cartoon character]], and [[F Abstinance|raged against abstinence]]. But no mention of his ailing father.

A poster on [[/cwc/]] contacted Chris via PSN regarding Bob. He posted a [http://www.cogsdev.org/w/images/9/9b/Bobbetter.jpg screen capture] of Chris's response, saying, "He is doing much better, thank you."Another contacted Chris via email and got a response saying, "Yes, my father is healthy and safe." Clearly he was neither, but this was at least proof that Bob hadn't joined the Whites-Only section of Heaven just yet. In late May, Chris finally mentioned [[Some Favored Comedians|a brief mention]] in a public video that his father was "alive and well," with no further elaboration on his condition.

On 24 March 2011, Bob claimed in a phone call to have cancer.<ref>http://youtu.be/y-GGSOyCm2k</ref>

On 20 July 2011, it was revealed that by that time [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Coming out to my parents|Bob knew about Chris's cross-dressing tendencies]] and strongly disapproved of them.

On 29 August, 2011, Chris, now in his [[Tomgirl Saga|cross-dressing phase]], [[Response to ADF|mentioned that Bob was an ill and sickly shut-in]], and had [[Chris and English|"feet-bloatings"]].

In early September, 2011, Bob was rushed by ambulance to Martha Jefferson hospital with heart failure. [[Rocky Shoemaker call|It was discovered later]] that Bob had been put into quarantine when he arrived because his body was [[14 Branchland Court|covered in bug bites]] and he posed a contamination risk.

On 6 September 2011, Bob died at age 84.<ref name="BobObit">http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600</ref> Out of respect for him and his family, the CWCki was closed for a week, 12-19 September, with the start date coinciding with the day Bob's funeral service was held. Site visitors were directed to a page which simply read "Robert Franklin Chandler Jr. 1927-2011".<ref name="BobObit" />

==Obituary==
Both [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] and Chris collaborated in writing Bob's obituary, which was published in two local papers. Main points of the obituary, apart from the standard birth date, date of death, and next of kin, include:

* Text going into unusual detail about what Bob did at General Electric.
* The location of the memorial service, "to follow on a later date", at [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]], the church that Barb, Bob and Chris used to frequent together. This is the same church that [[Rocky Shoemaker]] counsels Chris from.
* A footnote asking readers to not donate flowers, but to donate money to Barbara and Chris. Given [[Chris and money|the money habits of Chris]] and Barb, the remaining Chandlers may be in a dire financial situation.

===Original text===
[[Image:Rip internet lumberack by vekke.png|thumb|May you always watch over our sweet autist.]]
:''Robert Franklin Chandler Jr., 84, of Ruckersville, passed away the morning of Tuesday, September 6, 2011, at Martha Jefferson Hospital ICU surrounded by family, pastor and hospital staff.''

:''He was born on September 4, 1927, in Texas, the son of the late Robert Franklin Chandler Sr. and Jean Holloman Chandler. On June 7, 1980, he married Barbara Anne Weston, who survives. And the couple gave birth to a son, Christian Weston Chandler, who survives. Also surviving is ex-wife, Patricia, and their shared children, son, Dr. David Alan Chandler, survives, and daughter, Carol Suzanne Chandler, survives.''

:''He graduated from Auburn University with a degree in Engineering.''

:''He served in the United States Army Seoul Korea in the Signal Corp during the Korean War. He worked for General Electric as an Engineer with Steels, Plastics, etc. He also had patents for the controls for Plastic Molding Machines; without him, we would not have even a simple plastic funnel.''

:''Also surviving are granddaughter, Savannah Chandler, the daughter of David Alan Chandler and his wife, Kimberly.''

:''A funeral service will be held at Monticello Memory Gardens in Charlottesville, Virginia, 10 a.m. Monday, September 12, 2011. A memorial service to follow on a later date at Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church.''

:''Instead of flowers, you may make monetary donations to his widow, Barbara Chandler and son, Christian Chandler. <ref name="BobObit" />

==Relationships==

===Previous family===

Bob was previously married to a woman named Patricia.<ref name="BobObit" /> She's most likely the mother of his two other children, [[David Alan Chandler]] and [[Carol Suzanne Chandler]], with whom he was both out of contact in his later years.<ref name="Cole2">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref> For example, Chris did not know he had a niece named [[Savannah Chandler|Savannah]] until she was 8 years old.<ref>[[CWC's Diary#January 2004]]</ref>

===Barbara===

[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|With [[barbara Chandler|Barb]]]]

Bob and [[Barbara]] met in a bar on a karaoke night. Barbara was there with friends and Bob was singing.<ref name="Mumble 3.5">[[Mumble 3.5]]</ref> According to Chris, Barbara did the [[How to Talk to Girls|pursuing]]: "She chased him down the hall." This is probably why he figures that he could get away with being passive in terms of courtship. In contrast, [[Cole|Cole's]] friend Chuck, who worked at the bar, has a vivid memory of them being drunk retards.<ref name="Cole2" /> They got married in 1980.<ref name="Mumble 3.5" />

According to Chris, Barbara did not have sex with Bob for at least two decades before his passing. They had been sleeping in separate rooms for the past few years.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref> This is possibly due to an attempt to avoid spawning another subhuman freak like Chris.

===Cole===
Bob married Barbara when her son [[Cole]] was 17, around the time Cole left to lead his own life.

Cole feels that Bob's bitterness worked to separate his relationship with his mother. Cole said he would celebrate<ref name="Cole2"/> "when that fuck Bob finally drops," <ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|Email from Cole to Chris]]</ref> but it is unknown if he has yet to as of 9 September 2011. Cole said that he and Bob shared a mutual hatred,<ref name="Cole2" /> though we have no evidence yet that Bob hated Cole. In the least, it is certain that Bob knew Cole didn't like him.<ref name="Raising"/>

===Chris===

{{quote|Get away from the Internet! I'm cutting it down, right now.|Bob Chandler, Internet lumberjack.}}

[[Image:0106-ChristianWDad.jpg|thumb|"You tell them that you fell down some stairs or else I'm cutting down your [[Nintendo]]."]]

Bob wished that Chris was more interested in the world. He tried to teach Chris, but he thought (and rightly so) that Chris doesn't understand countries and continents beyond what he's seen on [[TV]], and only can associate with the places he's been in Virginia.<ref name="PSN 37" />

Bob's joke that [[Barack Obama]] would paint the White House black as soon as he became president influenced Chris to draw it in ''[[Sonichu 8]]''.

Chris has often complained about stressful confrontations with his father:

{{quote|well, my father is a major stressor against me; starts arguements[sic], annoys me, rarely washes his hands after restroom breaks (lord knows I've tried to encourage him to wash numerous time, and rarely succeeded.|Chris, [[IRC (31 December 2008)]]}}

After several occasions where trolls had communicated with Bob personally and found him to be quite pleasant and amicable, it's become obvious that he wasn't "starting arguments", as Chris asserts. More likely he was criticizing Chris's behavior and encouraging to better himself, which would involve work, which Chris fears and despises.

Bob had reportedly explained to him that he had taken care of his [[autistic]] ass for 29 years and so Chris should be more grateful. Chris couldn't give two shits, figuring that his father was ''obligated'' to take care of him, seeing no reason he should demonstrate any foreign concepts like "love", "support", "gratitude", and "willingness to help". Chris would run for his father's aid when he felt threatened, as in the later parts of the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]].

Despite Bob's occasional frustration over Chris's actions, he seemed to have bought into the theory that Chris is tormented by a [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|complex network of enemies spanning the entire world]], due to the [[Chris and his ego|success]] that he has earned from his very [[Chris and his ego|popular]] Sonichu franchise.<ref name="Church">[[Church audio]]</ref><ref name="Noble">[[Matthew Noble call]]</ref> In the [[Matthew Noble call]], it appears that Bob seemed to share Chris's tendency to bring up unrelated mishaps and debacles to make current incidents and sources of [[stress]] seem "petty" in comparison.

Once during a phone call with trolls, Bob stated that Chris had accomplished significant goals in his adult life. However, it is unknown if Bob actually believes that, or it was just something he was saying because he didn't want to admit to complete strangers that his son was a total failure in life and a leech on society.<ref name="Prank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNHIbffirxU&feature=player_embedded</ref>

He would never get past that notion, given that he continued to have to nursemaid Chris well into his son's late 20s. In the later parts of 2009 and throughout 2010, as chronicled in Chris's e-mails with [[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009|Vivian Gee]] and [[Jackie E-mails 7|Jackie]], Bob had been forced to take an increasingly active role in controlling Chris's spending and debt, paying off Chris's credit cards with his own money in an attempt to prevent interest charges from spiraling even further out of control. By the fall of 2010, he was monitoring Chris's bank accounts on a daily basis and keeping him on a strict allowance. Upon finding out about Chris's [[Tomgirl Pictures|escapades]] in early 2011, Bob's reaction was to question Chris's sexuality, at one point even calling him a fag.

Chris has said specifically that he doesn't have to love his father, but has to respect him.<ref>[[Mumble 1#Transcript|Mumble Chat 1]]</ref>

==Audio and video appearances==

[[Image:DemonicLumberjack.jpg|thumb|'''The Internet Lumberjack''' in his final form]]
In every appearance, Bob has proven himself to be better at charming Chris's [[sweetheart]]s than Chris himself.

* 26 February [[1994]]: Bob appears briefly behind Chris from 0:26 - 0:36 in the news report of Chris's [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]].
* 14 [[February 2009]]: [[Bob Walks In]] to Chris [[mass debating]].
* 18 [[February 2009]]: In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]] and [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7|3.7]], Bob rambles to [[Julie]].
* 15 [[March 2009]]: Bob [[Church audio|talked]] to [[Robert Simmons V]] at [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]] while [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Chris went to shit himself]].
* [[March 2009]]: Bob chaperoned Chris on his date with [[Emily]].
* 27 [[March 2009]]: Bob gets intruded by Chris in the [[Tour of Christian's House]], but is not visible.
* 27 [[August 2009]]: [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|Bob enters Chris's room]] and scolds him for making the [[Tour of Christian's House|house tour video]], (correctly) fearing that if someone saw the house as it was, they would be evicted (Uncut version only). This is a momentous occasion, showing some awareness on the part of the Chandlers that the filth and squalor they live in is a health hazard. This video subsequently off a wave of emails and calls to the Greene County Health Department, masterminded by trolls who hoped to realize Bob's fear of eviction, but the campaign was seemingly unsuccessful.
* [[November 2009]]: Bob and [[Barb|Snorlax]] make a brief appearance at the end of the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]].
* 15 [[August 2010]]: In his final outing on the damn internet, Bob gets a [[Matthew Noble call|call from the GAMe PLACe]] and is informed of Chris's actions earlier in the year. He then goes on a tangent about how Chris has been tormented by everyone ever since he was banned, and then demands Michael Snyder's information. Barbara also appears at the end of the call.
* [[Prank calls]]: Bob answered several of these.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Thehell.jpg|"The hell is this crap?"
Image:0009-ChristopherChristmas2.jpg|Looking at the presents, it's sometime between 1982 and 2011.
Image:0011-ChristopherBobXmas.jpg|That isn't Chris's half-senile old grandfather at [[Christmas]] time. It's Bob. He was that age when Chris was about one.
Image:0014-YoungerFather.jpg
Image:0032-BobAtRestraunt.jpg|The epitome of handsome.
Image:0038-AuntCorinaAndDad.jpg|Bob with [[Aunt Corrina]].
Image:0062-NewChristian&Dad.jpg|Notice Chris's discomfort.
Image:0120-BobbyBehindBars.jpg|Bob wouldn't let a fence get in the way of cutting down Chris's Internet.
Image:0230-ChristianAndDadInClass.jpg|Bob: fashion icon.
Image:0626-BobbyInGarden.jpg|When Bob wasn't arguing with Chris or cutting down his Internet, he enjoyed gardening.
Image:CreepyBobAndChris.JPG|Bob will haunt your dreams tonight.
Image:Bob_80th.jpg|Calm down Bob, I think you're scaring Snorlax.
</gallery>
</center>

==Fan videos==
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Bob
| video = {{#ev:youtube|cyMoams7EMw}}
| Stardate = 10 September 2011
| Maker = TheSevenRiders
| Subject = ''[[Metal Gear Solid]]''
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tribute to Bob Chandler
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ajEN2zrY8cQ}}
| Stardate = 11 September 2011
| Maker = 8x13Wolf
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris Chan - Tribute to Robert Chandler
| video = {{#ev:youtube|p48KrSYHkgo}}
| Stardate = 12 September 2011
| Maker = OVRFND
| Subject = ''[[Metal Gear Solid]]''
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = RIP Bob Chandler
| video = {{#ev:youtube|tyoboaDCJ0s}}
| Stardate = 29 September 2011
| Maker = furnacewoodsband
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}

==Sources==
{{Fan Art|chris=Bob Chandler}}
<references />

{{People}}
{{Not_Jerks}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Bob}}
[[Category:Family Members]]
[[Category:Dead]]

CWCki

2012-08-12T05:12:02Z

Rrosai: grammar naziism

{{Articleofthenow}}
''This is the article for the wiki ''about'' Chris. For more information about the wiki written ''by'' Chris, please see [[CWCipedia]]''.

[[Image:TypicalCWCkiPage.png|200px|thumb|What happens when CWCki gets [[Stress|STRESSED]]]]
[[Image:Cwcki2009.JPG|200px|thumb|Popularity of the cwcki throughout the years.]]

The '''CWCki''' (pronounced "quick-ee") was created by [[Cogsdev]], as the [[ED]] page was getting far too large for people to take. It serves as the Internet's only Wiki devoted to [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the [[autistic]] manchild that everyone loves to hate and hates to love. As with any Wiki, anyone can edit it, even YOU. Seriously though, if you're reading this, you are qualified and should be editing (just read [[Help:A Quick Guide to CWCki|this]] first).

As stated in its motto, '''no shit is too minor'''.

==History==
[[Image:CWCkicopter.JPG|thumb|left|One of the many members of the CWCki team, on the hunt for more information regarding autistic manchildren]]

The CWCki came to life on 110mb, the land of shitty web servers that go down every damn day.
Before the CWCki moved to cogsdev.org, it had a history of outages caused by shit servers and counter-trolls. This is a history of the CWCki:
* 25 [[January 2009]]: The CWCki's MediaWiki incarnation is founded.
* [[October 2008]]: 110mb shut down all its service for two entire weeks out of nowhere just to move to a different data center.
* [[White knight|Someone]] complained to 110mb in [[August 2009]] and everything got shut down. Then a day or two later, it was back up again.
* Due to maintenance, 110mb was closed from 13 September to 18 [[September 2009]].
* 4 [[January 2010]]: Finally, after the 9001st outage, the CWCki moved to Cogsdev.org.
* 26 [[June 2010]]: cogsdev.110mb.com is terminated from the server it was on.
* 7 [[November 2010]]: The CWCki moves from Cogsdev.org to Sonichu.com having obtained the domain name.
{{-}}

==Forum==

The '''[http://cwcki.forumer.com/ CWCki Forum]''' is frequented by many of the wiki regulars and other people interested of all things Christorical.

It is currently hosted on Forumer, and it was previously hosted on Yuku.

==Chris's opinion==

{{quote|With that, I respectfully ask the webmaster of the Unapproved and Detested CWCki to remove ALL PAGES Classified under their "[[Template:People|Christian Weston Chandler's Web Of Life]]" and "[[Template:Sweethearts|Sweethearts, heartsweets and gal-pals]]" Categories. I give him until Midnight of Friday March 12, 2010, Eastern Standard Time, for the Webmaster of that CWCki to Remove ALL OF THOSE PAGES, [[Chris and his Ego|or there will be trouble upon that Person directly from Me]].|[[Chris]], after discovering the CWCki, 02:03, 11 [[March 2010]] (CET).}}

The CWCki, like everything else on the [[Internet]] that criticizes him or depicts him unfavorably, is something that Chris hates. In the quote above Chris displays large amounts of his [[ego]] and as usual issues a [[death threat]]. Unfortunately for Chris, his demands did not go through. There are two reasons for this. First, his [[Clyde Cash|past track record with serious threats]] suggests that he [[stress|lacks the energy]] to put his ideas into action. Secondly, CWCkians are well aware of the solid legal standing of the website and will not cave to idle threats from autistic manchildren.

In the wee hours of 14 March 2010, Chris updated his blog, taking credit for the alteration of [[The Wallflower]]'s page and demanding that the rest of the pages mentioned earlier follow suit on or before 31 March or there would be trouble. [[Pocket knife|He IS armed]]. However, in true Chris fashion, midnight of 31 March passed with Chris doing absolutely jack shit. As if anyone was surprised.

On 2 April 2010, he tried to fulfill his threat, by making [[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki|3 minor edits]] under the name of [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|GodofThunderGodofWar]], obviously forgetting that CWCki editors are not ''entirely'' unaware of Chris's recent favorites in video game field. His edits were reverted immediately and his user and user talk pages were bombarded with negative comments. The edits so far were mostly done to glorify him, and are not exactly the kind of hard-hitting bombastic protest CWCkians were expecting based on [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|Chris's previous assault on ED]]. It appears that this profoundly lame attack of his had bigger impact on him, because in 19 April 2010, he set up an article in CWCipedia to [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=The_Christian_Truth list his revised truths].

{{quote|Because the Trolls and ALL such [[Chris and hypocrisy|Pig-Headed, Closed-Minded Idiots]] REFUSE to let me TELL them the Truth on THEIR websites with My Own Past Edits they have Undone, HERE is Where I Correct Some to Most of Their Pages filled with Half-Truths, Exaggerations and Lies.|Chris, glorious edit-warrior, having just suffered an epic defeat in the hands of an unjust wiki [[Manajerks|administration]].}}

Chris's only response to the CWCki in this form was the article he made for the CWCipedia named [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts]]. In it, Chris supposedly "set the record straight" about all the women in his life listed on the CWCki who we had supposedly gotten our facts wrong about, telling us what actually happened, (because we all know that Chris is far less biased than the CWCki when it comes to the subject of his own life). Naturally, he listed [[Ivy|several]] [[PandaHalo|women]] on there who were actually confirmed trolls working for the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|people who run this very site]], thus proving that Chris's "truths" and "corrections" were really [[lies]] and mistakes all along.

Chris would later come back to the CWCki under the name [[JenkinsJinkies]], a poor [[disguises|disguise]] that fooled no-one, but one which the administrators played along with for a [[Laughs Under Lucricities|laugh]]. After a few more minor [[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki|edits]], Chris eventually left the site again, as the administrators had fooled him into thinking he had been noticed by the higher-ups and let into the secret inner circle of the [[Trollin Train|trolling cabal]]. This is what eventually led to the [[The MovingFoward videos|PS3 destruction videos]].

Following the [[28 October 2011|October 2011 Michael Snyder Bash-smash-ween]], Chris showed up as [[User:Christianchandler|Christianchandler]] to upload photographs of Snyder and The GAMe PLACe, and to accuse Snyder of being '''fat''', child-molesting and "slender" (bolding and sarcasm quotes his).

==References by Chris==
* [[Wallflower E-mails 3]] - Chris is made aware of the CWCki's existence by his [[gal-pal]] who discovered the site and assumed it was created by Chris.
* [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)]] - After seeing how well the CWCki documented all of his past relationships with women, Chris created this page to share [[Chris and reality|his side of the story]].
* [[Jackie Chat 1]] - Chris gives [[Jackie]] specific examples of how he thinks the CWCki "slanders" him.
* [[JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV]] - [[JenkinsJinkies]] pledges allegiance to [[Clyde Cash]] and the CWCki.
* [[LittleBigPlanet]] - In [[February 2011]], Chris posted [http://lbp.me/v/w4vcbs a quote] on his LittleBigPlanet profile and demanded that it be added to the CWCki's front page.
* [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] - In [[July 2011]], Chris warn his [[Tomgirl|gal-pals]] against the danger of CWCki and internet bullies
* [[Calling Out]] - In [[August 2011]], Chris demands two trolls to remove their contributions or suffer the consequences.
* [[Victory Rockout]] - Chris states (read: yells incoherently) that the CWCki is a "damn lie" and to never trust it. Apparently, if you wish to ask questions, [[Mailbag|ask him personally]] and he will [[Lie|answer with honesty]].
* [[Facebook#28 April 2012|Facebook, 28 April 2012]] - in which Chris discovered the CWCki forum (link to it is admittedly hard to find on the main page, as you ''actually need to scroll down'') and launched a dastardly misinformation campaign of epic proportions. And it totally worked, according to Chris anyway!

==See also==
*[[JenkinsJinkies]]
*[[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki]]
*[[CWCipedia]]

[[Category:CWCki]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Talk:Jackie E-mails

2010-12-27T07:26:39Z

Rrosai:

==1000 GET==
Give or take, this should be the 1,000th CWCki article. Congratulations guys, it's you who have made the CWCki so damn great.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:27, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:* Yay us! Also, relevant to the article, it seems like we kinda came in half way to the conversation. Was this a hook profile ad? If so, wow. Someone got through to him when many others didn't. If I can ask the author, what email of his did you mail, and where did you email from? -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:36, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::*she already left a message through the community portal. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 04:41, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:::* Cool, thanks Clyde. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:47, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:* Here's to 1,000 more! So is Jackie article worthy yet? Her community portal message (again) speaks volumes about how women view Chris, though I assume since this information isn't cwcanon, we'll have to wait until he makes I Need You Damian Antaria the Sequel.--[[User:AdderCress|AdderCress]] 05:57, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:::*A short page on Jackie might not be a bad idea. I mean, we have a page for [[Caitlin]]. Mostly document her Community portal post, stuff like that. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:27, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

So. He reveals the sign, the Pokemon, and the trolls all in one e-mail. Damn.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:18, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

== To do ==

*<s>Wikify</s>
<s>*Make them into level 2 headings (for easier citation of individual e-mails)</s> [''Done.''] -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 08:31, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
*<s>Categorize</s>
*Incorporate material into other articles
--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:28, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

== E-mail address? ==

Do we know which e-mail address these went to? Chris doesn't seem to reply at all from his AOL one. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 14:38, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
*He doesn't reply to ''you'' if you send him an e-mail to his AOL account. If you have a wet [[china]], however...--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:58, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
*I figured as much, I just wanted to make sure I wasn't doing it wrong. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 18:50, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

==Dear god.==
He just rambles on and on. I love how he brings up MLW, and the names of his pokemon without any sort of provoking. It's like he can't stop himself. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 16:26, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:He's starving for attention. I guess the YASG is not paying enough in that sector. Promises of China also helps... [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 23:29, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

==Random note==

I guess a funny thing is that this person has the same first name as I do. [[User:Chaosakita|ChaosAkita]] 21:12, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

Adding another random note here: do we know anything about what Jackie looked like? I saw the "I guess I'm a suitable candidate for you, I have strong arms" line and something about that just screams "he's calling her fat" to me. [[User:Psychobabble|Psychobabble]] 01:06, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

:* I don't know about that. We know Chris ''would'' go for it if she were, but he seems that enthusiastic about it it's possble she's not. I don't think she's been using Blanca style pictures, but even so. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 01:11, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

==White Knight==

Is it really accurate to describe her as such in this article? She strikes me as an excellent and very subtle troll who pushes Chris's buttons at an early stage while making it seem incidental. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 00:03, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
: That's the vibe I'm getting, too... (I mean, come on, mistaking Asperchu for Chris's creations, when it has Alec's names all over the place? A coldly calculated berserk button press if there ever was one...) but either way, until we know for ''sure,'' it's hard to pass a definite judgment either way. Speculation isn't good until it's ''conclusive'' speculation. In my opinion, let's mention all unsubstantiated but logical theories we can think of, or mention none. =) --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 00:38, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
::I say we just treat her like an innocent woman who had no idea what she was getting into, without labeling her has a troll or a white knight. It's the way she presented herself to us, and it's funnier.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 01:32, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
::*Despite my Original Reaction and at the time most sound thoughts I am inclined to say that She Is A Dirty Dang Troll! HOWEVER, I do agree with Beat in that we should Keep Her that way. When in Doubt, which I Do Have due to my friggen Mental Block, just AGREE With Beat, it is Safer. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 01:47, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
:There's lots of evidence that she's a troll; note how she showed up just when we found out about Hook Cafe, she pushes his buttons CONSTANTLY, sometimes in really subtle ways ("people use stress as an excuse to not get anything done"), she pushes him hard to get more work done on comics and videos, she leaked the emails, etc. HOWEVER, Chris reads Cwcki, and we shouldn't post anything about her being a troll until we're sure it's all over. Should we? [[User:Sygerrik|Sygerrik]] 14:59, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
:*As I mentioned to someone else, for the purposes of the narrative, Jackie is a real girl and we should treat her as such. Even if she is a troll, she is playing a girl named Jackie and we don't need to point out this fact because any intelligent person should realize this if they so wish to believe. But since we are mostly writing within Chris's point of view, Jackie is real.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:24, 30 April 2010 (UTC)
::*If I may make a humble suggestion, I do think we should do this in the future regarding trolls, except in unusual circumstances. For instance, the real identity of PandaHalo is really irrelevant to what happened; even if we somehow learned it and she/he was okay with us publishing that information, it doesn't add much to what went on. Julie/BlueSpike's real age, however, was ''very'' relevant. Jackie being a troll isn't relevant to what happened, especially since her 'real' self had no contact with Chris. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 07:36, 30 April 2010 (UTC)

== Merging ==

I think it needs to be in two parts - three was a little redundant. But the article is a shade too long/messy as one. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 19:20, 26 September 2010 (PDT)

==Move==
Can someone move this to "Jackie E-mails 1"? We have "Jackie Emails 4-23" but 1, 2, and 3 have different names. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 09:20, 3 December 2010 (PST)
:Since it's the "starter page" to the Jackie E-mails series, it can probably live without the 1 in the name. I created a redirect from it though for navigational purposes. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 09:32, 3 December 2010 (PST)

== Images, etc. ==
Is there a reason the images and other mentioned attachments aren't shown or linked to? Have they not been obtained or not "in play" (I also noticed the conspicuous absence of the JenkinsJinkies application vid on the cwciki)? I tried to find some of them elsewhere on the cwciki as I read along, such as the pictures drawn for Jackie with the Injun circle-jerk, etc., but to no avail.[[User:Rrosai|Rrosai]] 23:26, 26 December 2010 (PST)

Talk:EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW

2010-12-21T08:48:38Z

Rrosai: /* Hair */

I am transcribing this BITCH. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 01:14, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:*Fucking done. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:21, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

Ahahahaha, Chris is going to organize the high school reunion by himself. This is awesome as it is, but we can't let this opportunity to troll him go by. [[User:EtonpilfAnetah|EtonpilfAnetah]] 01:18, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

How do we know that a reunion has already been organised, and that Chris was not invited? [[User:Sorrid Snake|Sorrid Snake]] 01:29, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

oh, i did some digging around. i don't have it on me, but i'm 95% sure there was one planned. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 01:30, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

I think the single funniest thing in this video is that Chris implies he thinks the reason he cant break into the video game industry is because of trolls working for Nintendo. Also, i'm pretty sure he wants a reunion so he can hook up, I'd imagine the last women willing to associated with him were in highschool. Also, I dunno what to do with this, do whatever if you want, just doodling.[[File:Names.PNG|thumb|center]] [[User:Pinefresh|Pinefresh]] 02:40, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

Need any on scene reporters for this shit. I don't live that far away from Manchester High.[[User:ShinGokuIAM|ShinGokuIAM]] 05:23, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

* Sure. I'd post it here, but you Google it yourself....(chris if you're reading this you're a lazy shit). If the date is november then you got it. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 07:01, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

I checked it out a couple months ago, and I didn't see anything that would indicate that they had planned a reunion. Besides, if I remember correctly, Chris was on one of the mailing lists to be informed if something did happen. Given that few, if any, of his former classmates are aware of his internet notoriety, I doubt that he would've been left out of the loop.--[[User:Racer X|Racer X]] 06:56, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

* Well, I have an address and date and time and everything. I'm sure that was probably a fake Chris... [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 07:01, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

* Oh, I see. You were posting your answer as I was posting my hypothesis. Leave it to the great Clyde Cash to be one step ahead of Inspector Detector and I. --[[User:Racer X|Racer X]] 07:05, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

== Side note. ==

One interesting thing I noticed while transcribing this BITCH. Chris repeats his number for emphasis- does he think YouTube is live? Like live TV? He seems to do almost all of his videos 'on the first take', mistakes included, so this would seem plausible. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:20, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:*It's because doing multiple takes and editing is SO HARD and WAY TOO MUCH WORK. Also one take is much more TRUE and HONEST. Someone gets into it somewhere on the CWCki, but I forget where.--[[User:RTBHBX|RTBHBX]] 06:01, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

== Transcribing his shit english? ==

We all know Chris can't present himself verbally, but it's getting to the point where it can be difficult to follow the transcription for his videos since they seem to be written out fairly close to verbatim to his actual speech. Since the transcribing seems to be done by a small group of people (thanks for that, by the way) it's fairly consistent, but even so, should there be some kind of guideline written up for it? Such as what mispronounciations should be included, what stuttering to include, that sort of thing? -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 20:47, 27 August 2010 (PDT) (signature added later for clarification purposes).

:*First of all, sign your posts (it's just <nowiki>--~~~~</nowiki> at the end of your post). Secondly, some videos are transcribed like that- I transcribed part of Mumble 6 that way, mainly because it was Chris and Julie cybering and I really didn't need to go over and over that just to make sure I got every bit of his spastic stuttering correct. Speaking personally, I prefer to make the transcription as faithful as possible- including stuttering and mistakes. I believe that's the most 'faithful' way to render articles where Chris speaks, including this one. That's one of the perks about being a transcriber- you get to pick your style. If the inclusion of the stuttering (etc) really annoys you, the only thing I can suggest is to take a stab at the vast library of untranscribed audio we have available and transcribe it to your liking. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:24, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

::*Sorry about the unsigned, Slipped my mind. And I would probably be a bad choice for transcribing, as due to my personal history I use a spastic mix of English and American spelling, among other things. This wasn't intended as a criticism, just asking if there should be a general guideline. Like I said in the original post, the work of the transcribers is greatly appreciated. Sometimes it's just... painful to listen to him, and it's a lot easier to just read over his idiocy. -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 20:47, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

==Hair==
So far, I've only looked at the thumb but from the image it really seems like his MPB is proceeding just as planned.
EDIT: Looked at the first few seconds. It's clear as day now. Chris is going bald really quickly. Anyone care to estimate how long he's got/ I would, but I don't know how to. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 08:04, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

:Think that as his MPB progresses we can chronicle his receding hairline? I'd be interested to see how quickly it is falling out now compared to the last few years. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 10:18, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

: I don't know how long he has but it really doesn't look healthy. It looks greasy and stringy and I honestly wonder how long it's been since he's bathed or washed his hair.
Either way, I'd say that he'll be completely bald by November. Just looking at it now compared to pictures from FAF, there's a very noticeable difference. - [[User:Captainhowdy|Captainhowdy]] 10:24, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

::Oh, this ties rather nicely into what I said about his [[CWCki:Speculation/What health problems will Chris develop first|endocrine/integumentary troubles]]. He definitely has androgenic alopecia, and the last three years have been something of a turning point for him; if you've noticed he's lost nearly all of his hair in the temples(which is where it's first lost), and about half the area in the frontal, it's at about a Norwood3 now. As to when he’ll lose the rest, well, It's hard to give a set schedule on hair loss as it's so dependent on specifics, with some individuals it retreats to a certain extent and then stabilizes(bob for instance), or it might just progress at an increasing rate. Chris definitely seems to be the later: his life style is going to have a greater impact as he ages, and his increasing body fat means that his body puts together more hormones ,DHT(hair loss skin problems) included, this has a disproportional effect because Chris seems to be sensitive to DHT(which is hereditary) and other hormones can convert to DHT but DHT can’t convert to anything else. You can see how this has worked by looking at a this from a case study standpoint: most of the loss he had from 18-26 was at the ends temples which is in line with the adult hair line men develop; past 08 though he’s lost all his hair from the temples, and afterwards started losing it in the frontal(middle forehead) at a accelerating pace, essentially we can consider that to be the full onset. If I had to give an estimate on how it’s going to progress it’d be that his hair in the temples area will have gone to his vertex in about six months, and he’ll lose the frontal in that time to a year (If you look you can see that it’s patchy in the front, which means it’s micronzing and a becomes progressively thinner every hair cycle, that's why you see it get worse every few months), the next likely point of thing is going to be at the vertex which depending on factors might take as much as a couple of years to clear out. I think you could say with confidence that he’ll have advanced alopecia by the time he’s 30, namely that the clearings in his temples frontal and vertex will have linked into one larger sea of bald.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 11:39, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
*Cool story, bro. Actually, i was looking for someone to say pretty much this. That seems to fit with my prediction range nicely, so that's pretty cool. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 11:45, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:Lolk, sorry about the TLDR, a simple answer just seemed misleading. I think it's pretty interesting that Chris seems to be trying his hand at a combover, so he's probably noticed. I wonder if he's going to try meds... given how extensive his hair loss is now(temple hair has been gone too long), he'd need a transplant to reverse it.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 12:05, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
::Chris can't even go bald with dignity. The worst part is that he still thinks he has a full head of hair. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 12:12, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
*Holy shit, if you pause it at 4:30, you can see what appears to be a seriously large patch of skin under a comb-over, unless that's just an artifact of video compression or something. Maybe the baldest image of him yet. [[User:Rrosai|Rrosai]] 00:48, 21 December 2010 (PST)

==Trollbusters==

Hmm, I wonder where Chris is getting his Trollbuster idea from? I've poked Google and beyond a website that shuts down patents, most of the Trollbuster gatherings were failures. Which isn't totally surprising considering who we're dealing with here, but still. My guess, though, is that he's probably either a) met a group on PSN or b) decided to come up with it himself.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 08:36, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
*The answer is B.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 08:41, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

** Ironically enough, the real troll busters are a group of lawyers that specialize in patent law: "[http://www.troll-busters.com/ Troll-Busters]" --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 09:52, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
*** That website is as terrible as their services invaluable. ... Anyhow: given there's a Trollbusters truck with a no-trolls logo, we can assume he's riffing on the more-popular Ghostbusters for once. You'd think he'd put the no-troll logo on the t-shirt instead of a block of text, but then Chris is a lazy idiot, so! [[User:EnsignDisposable|EnsignDisposable]] 10:00, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
**** It's quite obvious he just made it up, since, you know, he's Chris. Right now I think the more prevalent issue is whether he is going to build on the trollbusters, perhaps going so far so as to include them as characters in his later comic strips, or if this is just going to disappear due to his laziness. [[User:Melainia|Melainia]] 20:50 15 September 2010 (EST)

Next thing you know he's going to be talking about the cyberpolice and how consequences will never be the same...--[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 10:20, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

First time I heard it, I had thought "Mythbusters" (also: "Great, now I gotta kill him before he draws them in his comic", but I digress), but seems to be most likeley that other Ghostbusters is the idea, since 'SonichuBusters' and 'CWCBusters' probably didn't sound self-serving enough.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 20:31, 15 September 2010 (PDT)

==Alumni Class==
So I checked online and found that Chris actually has 8 accounts with the alumniclass.com website. While you don't HAVE to pay for membership ($20) they give you a limited profile where you can't really do anything if you don't pay. Chris may have paid for a number of the memberships. This is really sad for Chris because, using a limited profile, I was able to find the reunion date and place in a few seconds. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 10:27, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
* So, was Chris deliberately not invited to the reunion, or is it just that he hasn't found out about the reunion because he's a retard? [[User:EtonpilfAnetah|EtonpilfAnetah]] 10:40, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:99% chance that those accounts are trolls. Learn to spot 'em... Besides, despite just about everyone saying they know the date/location, NO ONE has offered those bits of info. Instead of so [[ego|self-assuredly]] saying that Chris missed out and was uninvited, why don't we offer proof of this claim? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 11:00, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
::Fine: (edited out to avoid giving potentially valuable info away) I can even put in the contact info. I withheld it because I thought Chris might be watching this. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 11:28, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:::Well... I stand corrected, then. I'm fairly sure Chris is already well-aware of this in any case. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 11:39, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:::: November will be so cash. [[User:CaptainCanuck|CaptainCanuck]] 13:34, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
*I left a message telling him the details, but I'm not sure if he'll bother to listen to it or take it seriously. I'm still trying to get in contact with him. I may just end up calling Bob and telling him I'm Chris's former classmate and the reunion details. [[User:Meat Miracle|Meat Miracle]] 19:21, 28 August 2010 (PDT)
:*Know it's not a forum but I have to know why you'd bother telling him.--[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 21:52, 28 August 2010 (PDT)
::*So he'll be able to attend the reunion and make an ass out of himself. Think strategically, brah. [[User:Victor Charlie|Victor Charlie]] 23:00, 28 August 2010 (PDT)
:::*I don't know if telling him will do anything - after all, he doesn't want to be tricked by us DAMN DIRTY TROLLS. I'm going to guess he's too mentally retarded to figure out where the reunion is, let alone go there. [[User:EtonpilfAnetah|EtonpilfAnetah]] 17:27, 29 August 2010 (PDT)

==Deliberately not invited?==

I wasn't "invited" to my five-year reunion because I'd moved a mile away from where I lived in high-school in the interim and I wasn't very connected socially with anyone from my class before or after. I found out about it, I showed up, I paid the $20, and that was that. I'm not sure anyone is really invited to their high-school reunion—it's put on and they're just informed of its existence. The invitation is implicit.

A more likely scenario is that no one was wont to research the current whereabouts of like 300 other people so they just organized the damned thing and didn't make it a secret. Chris might even have seen the information about it on the Internet not been able to wrap his retarded, autism-riddled brain around the idea that just because it's on the Internet doesn't make it the work of trolls just because he has a unique history of being trolled.

He might just think what many of you seem to think—that if it were a real reunion, someone would've contacted him if they wanted him to come. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 11:17, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

*You know, ''I'''d be pretty fucking paranoid if I found out that for the last two years of my life the only people I've had contact with were people who hate me and enjoy watching me fail, and that most, if not all, of the major events in my life in that period were orchestrated by said people. Just saying. --[[User:DStecks|DStecks]] 12:54, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:I guess it's true what they say, then: ''you're just like Chris.''

:No, um... what's interesting about all the trolling—at least as it's been presented publicly—is how fucking obvious it is that the trolls never act like normal people would and that despite how bluntly he's told that he's not acting right and they're not acting right, he plows forward only to be humiliated and frustrated again without ever learning any lessons about how people behave. This whole problem could be answered with a phone call: surely someone the high school staff knows about the reunion even though the school itself probably has nothing to do with organizing it, but Chris insists on barreling forward with his ridiculous YouTube videos which have never helped him before and which he has no reason to believe anyone involved's going to see, before or after the reunion because Chris and Co. go on forcefully believing the first thought that oozes into their heads and go on defending it to the death for no reason.

:tl;dr Chris consistently trusts people he shouldn't and doesn't trust people he should for no reason and this is just another indication of that. It's on and he's invited—he just refuses to acknowledge it. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 13:42, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

{{Not A Forum}}

Why is it so hard for people to sign your posts?! It's just 4 ~ in a row. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 14:08, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:Every post in this section has been signed. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 15:26, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
::And I was supposed to know that the paragraphs all belonged to you and not to a person who doesn't sign their posts....how? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 16:51, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
:::By possessing some basic skills in the english language. --[[User:CaptainCanuck|CaptainCanuck]] 17:21, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:One click actually. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 15:34, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

== Real Troll Busters ==

There is an actual group called [http://www.trollbuster.com/ Troll Busters]. It's in "patent reexamination services" which I have no idea what means. Either way, the important part remains: they have a copyright and a trademark on the name Troll Busters and they are not related to internet trolls at all. Judging by his recent Modnation creations he's trying to make some franchise out of his Trollbusters. Poor dumb Chris can't even google anymore. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 20:37, 27 August 2010 (PDT)
: Short explanation of [[wikipedia:Patent troll|patent trolls]]: they're people who 1) make an invention or acquire a patent from someone else, 2) without saying a word, let some bigger company to make an another invention which uses the exact same technology, and 3) sue the bigger company for infringing on the little guy's patents. All this while decidedly ''not'' having plans to actually use the invention for anything themselves. A famous case: [[wikipedia:Eolas|Eolas]] vs. Microsoft on web browser plugins. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 03:19, 28 August 2010 (PDT)

== New Subject Matter? ==

Should there be a new tag involving real life? I would've said high school, but even with these two recent videos, it's too early to tell if he'll continue making videos once in a while, let alone those involving the high school reunion. --[[User:Marco|Marco]] 23:03, 27 August 2010 (PDT)

U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L

2010-12-19T20:54:03Z

Rrosai:

[[File:Chris_chan_creep.jpg|thumb|Chris, performing some sort of unholy chanting.]]

"'''U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L'''" is a video uploaded by [[Chris]] on 15 January 2010. The video title, written in some kind of reversed [[Wikipedia:leet|1337]] pseudo-[[Spanish]], is translated as "Love [[Sonichu]] and hate [[Asperchu]]". However, the 1337 Chris uses is questionable at best. The characters placed in forward order don't read like he thinks they do.

Chris tries to be clever by speaking Spanish backwards, but he just ends up sounding like a raving lunatic. He ends the video by chanting "Uhcinos evol!" (love Sonichu) over and over again, perhaps believing he can brainwash everyone into liking him again, not that anyone ever has. Conversely, he uses the other incantation, "Uhcrepsa etah!" (hate Asperchu), in a failed attempt to draw away the [[troll|masses]] from the new [[Asperchu|rising star]] in the universe of the Hedgehog Pokémon.

It backfires horribly, as it comes out as sounding something like "ooh-crep-sah ay-tah" and "ooh-see-noce ee-vol." Complete gibberish.

Some argue that he got the idea from [[Wikipedia:New_Kids_on_the_Blecch|this episode]] of ''[[The Simpsons]]'', where the [[Navy]] brainwashes people into joining by creating a song with the phrase, "Yvan eht nioj" as the chorus. The joke was that it was pronounced as it is written, making the idea of being able to hear it, then subliminally reconstruct the phrase in the listener's head, all the more ridiculous.

He has now been wearing the same shirt for about 4 days. Take from that what you will. He also promised early in the video that two new pages would be uploaded that evening, which turned out to be a [[lie]], as Chris did not update the [[CWCipedia]] that evening at all.
{{clear}}
==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L
| image = {{#ev:youtube|JlpM-efj0qQ}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 15 January 2010
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Comics.png]] Comics
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy
| Saga = {{Asperchu}} [[Asperchu]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Advicedogshirt.png]] [[Advice Chris|Advice Dog]]
| previous = [[15 January 2010]]
| next = [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===

Ah, [[Captain's Log]], Stardate... I believe it is the fifteenth of [[January 2010]].

Hm. As usual, I will have two more pages tonight, I hope you all enjoyed the last page where [[Crystal]] finally got out of the mirror.

But recently, I am reminded of an old Spanish expression which goes simply as, ''Tú necesitas uhcrepsa etah y uhcinos evol per ganar felicidad por vida.'' [''Chris proceeds to mangle the Spanish language, though it can be translated to: "You need to hate [[Asperchu]] and love [[Sonichu]] in order to be happy for life."'']

Ah, couple of strong verbs in that sent- in that statement. Say it with me.

[''Chris gets frighteningly close to the camera, his eyebrows poised to strike.'']

Uhcrepsa etah... uhcrepsa etah...

Y uhcinos evol... uhcinos evol...

Alright, stay safe and have a good day. Bye-

[''Video cuts off abruptly.'']

==Fan videos==
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan's satanic message played backwards
| video = {{#ev:youtube|v9ozL9TepGQ}}
| Stardate = 16 January 2010
| Maker = warpspeed651
| Subject = Chris
| Video Type = Played backwards
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Creepy CWC
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Cw0fJNIA7gc}}
| Stardate = 18 January 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject = Chris
| Video Type = Creepy remix
}}

==See also==
*[[Spanish]]
*[[Asperchu]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[15 January 2010]]|nextlink=[[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke]]|}}

{{Captain's Log}}

Examples of Chris's Ego

2010-12-17T10:13:22Z

Rrosai:

Here's an exhaustive list of '''Examples of Chris's Ego''' in the real world and in the Sonichu Comic. The list is so long that it warrants its own page!

==In the real world==

===School===
*[[Manchester High School]] - When Chris graduated from high school, he actually cried because he believed that he deserved a number of artistic awards for his [[Chris and art|artwork]]. By his own admission, he also made a scene and ran out after getting his diploma, eventually having to be consoled by both his [[mother]] and gal-pal [[Tiffany Gowen]].
*[[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]] - After being expelled for his [[Chris and anger|appalling behavior]] by the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Student's Dean]], Chris felt the need to write to the Then-Standing President of the United-States, [[George W. Bush]]. The idea that a standing President would be willing to use his clout to reverse a local third-rate college's administrative decision is ludicrous at best.

===Public places===
*[[Wal-Mart]] - When asked to cease his solicitation, Chris refused to budge, rambled on in some stupid speech, and actually ''ran''. He would do this again in a [[Target]] soon after, only to be arrested in the process.
*[[The GAMe PLACe]] - Chris acted in this store as if he owned the place. He was rude with the patrons, abused the access to a flat-screen TV and was an all-around pain for the manager, [[Michael Snyder]]. After many antics, he was banned from the place. Chris filmed a half-assed [[Apology to Game & Hobby Place|apology]] nine months later, not because he was sorry for his actions, but because the store was the only place that had [[Eye of Judgement]] cards. Chris has also attempted to incite harassment of employees of the store (using the very fans he had chastised mere weeks earlier), simply because Michael had refused to remove his ban.
*[[McIntire Park]] - During a newscast, Chris happened to pass by a cameraman who was videotaping someone being interviewed. As he did, he flashed his Sonichu [[medallion]] as if to say "Hey, look at me! I'm more important!" Sometime later, he appeared in a town hall meeting over the park itself. He flashed his shitty Sonichu and Rosechu drawing in a bizarre attempt to save it, then tried to interrupt the proceedings with a speech about how he didn't want to pay for a YMCA membership when the recognized speaker made the mistake of referring to him. He was no doubt trying to gain sympathy by noting that it would make an ostensible retard sad to build the YMCA. Chris was promptly and thankfully shot down.

===With people===
*[[Megan Schroeder]] - For the longest time, Chris actually believed that he and Megan were going out as boyfriend and girlfriend. He even attacked someone for getting near Megan. When the infamous [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] picture was discovered, Chris actually thought that the reason she was upset was because she wasn't used to sexual things. He then tried to make Megan believe that the bullying from those amongst [[ED]] was MUCH worse than the fact that he did the picture because he was afraid of trying to rape her. He also insisted that he was under much more emotional pain than she was. Chris would later blame ED for the fact that he lost her friendship, not caring it was his fault in the first place.
*[[10 September 2009]] - Chris, in his ever-growing paranoia, automatically assumes that a possible interview from Veronica Belmont of ''PlayStation Magazine Europe'' is a troll due to the fact that the person didn't leave a return number, demanding that if she truly wanted to interview him, she should come ''personally'' to his house... then starts trying to suck up to her just in case it wasn't a troll.
*[[Rejected Mailbag]] - Chris hates being proven wrong, especially about Asperger's and Autism being part of the same spectrum. He also takes issue with letters that point out the flaws in his comic pages, which is interesting considering he has no problem telling fans about the flaws he finds in their fan art, calling it "constructive criticism". He's gone from simply ignoring people correcting his mistake to placing these "offending" letters in his rejected mailbag. Even more, when any of the letters mention the similarities between Autism and Aspergers, he tosses them into his "Autism Mailbag" and whenever someone tries to mention anything else connected to his past, he automatically goes into a "mental block" and refuses to go any further. On 5 December 2009, Chris wrote a long essay that made little sense, which mainly consisted of him bawwing that he was a unique and special snowflake, and that Aspies are faking fakers that take away the specialness of his autism. Despite autism and Asperger's existing in the populace long before he was born, and Chris being a [[virgin with rage]], Chris also states that he [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|"...Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People".]]
*[[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|The Sonichu promotional video]] - In the Part 2 of his video, Chris shows to the camera an elegant drawing of the two main heroes of the comic book made by a fan called Allie. Not only does he proceed to comment "Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her," he presents an actual, sub-par copy of the drawing made by himself as a better version.
*[[Chris and Copyright|Copyright claim against Vivian Gee]] - For the most part, Chris ignored the [[Audiobooks]] that were being made out of his comics. However, when he found out that they were being "sold", Chris issued [[Death threats]] against [[Vivian Gee]]. Threatening to kill her AND [[Clyde Cash|her family]]. He then released his own [[Official Videobooks]], which he believed to be better than Vivian's. These consisted of holding up the TRUE and ORIGINAL pages up to a camera and waving the page around as he stumbled through the dialogue, made childish sound effects, and failed to explain what was actually going on. He excused himself a month later and asked for a quote of 25% out of the donations she received for her hard work. It is worth mentioning that the excuse AND the demand for a share of the profits were in the same e-mail, separated by a single dot.
*[[Jimmy Hill]], [[Liquid Chris]] and [[Asperchu|Alec Benson Leary]]- While Chris is more than willing to declare Sonichu as a parody so he can make his multimedia franchise, he blows his stack whenever someone ''actually'' parodies Sonichu and himself. He threatened "legal action" during the Jimmy Hill saga and went all out to prove himself the True and Honest Chris when Liquid showed up. During the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]], when Liquid threatened to go to the police over the Gun Comic, Chris was certain that the police would be more concerned over the fact that someone was impersonating him than the fact that he threatened to murder him. When Alec Benson Leary's Asperchu began to be more popular than Sonichu, Chris decided to pull a number of things, including a moment of "pot calling the kettle black" in which he decries Asperchu as crappy because it was computer drawn.
*[[Father Call]] - When talking to [[Kacey]]'s father, his ego clashed horribly against Matt's attempts to get through to his head, comparing losing a loved one to Chris losing his [[Patti|dog]], declaring that mowing the lawn (a menial task at that) was tough work and utterly missing various cues to people's hardships, such as when Matt told him that his mother pulled weeds while inflicted with arthritis, Chris could only apologize for her having arthritis, not be impressed by the feat.
*[[Evan]] - When Evan created the character "Simonchu" as a joke, Chris took it, turned it into a girl and renamed her "Simonla". When Evan got tired of Chris using the monstrosity, he demanded that he kill her. Chris has refused many times but a [[Mailbag 43|recent Mailbag]] took the cake: he told Evan, in detail, how his Simonchu would try to take back Simonla, how Wild Sonichu would defend and defeat Simonchu and Simonchu would return to Evan's "ECGVille" and say that she didn't want to come back, all under Chris's GDC ("Great Director Chandler") powers.
*[[Shigeru Miyamoto]] - Chris was convinced that Miyamoto, who is a world-famous video game designer and creator of beloved and legendary icons like Mario and Zelda, would not only be honored to meet him, but in fact even ''more'' honored to meet Chris than Chris would be to meet him. Then, even after having his game proposal rejected by Miyamoto, Chris still remained convinced that Miyamoto was only "holding out on [him]" and would surely accept his offer in the near future.
*[[Asperchu|Alec Benson Leary]] - Chris loves to hold some form of superiority over people he doesn't like, and the [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls|calls Alec made]] to Chris are great examples. Chris calls Alec's art "crappy" several times, his reasoning being that it is drawn with a tablet, and doesn't have the "character" that his own pencil-and-paper methods apparently convey. He also tells Alec he is "obviously naïve" because he ''doesn't'' believe that cartoon and comic book characters have real feelings and hasn't been deceived countless times by trolls, and implies that he thinks Alec is pathetic in a rather snide tone of voice, despite having no real reasons to back this up. Despite Alec actually being genial to him during the first few calls, Chris attempts to insult and demean him anyway, and acts like a child being scorned when Alec inevitably becomes angered by this. In a [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|recent call]], Chris actually has the balls to tell Alec that there was a price to pay for making him kill off Simonla - Alec, Evan, Sean and Mao's deaths in the comic.
*[[Bob Chandler]] - On 01 [[March 2010]], Chris [[twitter]]ed the sad news that Bob Chandler, Chris's father, was hospitalized with a life-threatening heart condition. Instead of asking for prayers (like many [[Chris and religion|Christians]] do) or putting his comic on hold, he whined about the [[stress]] it caused him and talked about the newest dates for release of [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu 11]]. The next day, he released [[02 March 2010|two]] [[Surfshack Tito|videos]]. Neither had any info on or mention of his father or his condition. He didn't even update [[CWCipedia|his website]] or his [[The OFFICIAL Sonichu & Rosechu Blog|blog]] with the sad news. Here's the sum of all the love and concern Chris expressed for his Dad: One and a half lines of the 11 tweets he sent that afternoon.<ref>[http://twitter.com/CWCSonichu Chris's Twitter]</ref>
*[[Fans]] - Ever since day one, Chris has treated his fanbase like shit. He insulted one of the few fans he had, shrugs his shoulders and says "Whatever" whenever a fan tells him they were going to leave and then he expects them to come to his aid whenever it's necessary. When Chris lost his latest [[gal-pal]] due to troll interference, not only did he attack the trolls, he also attacked his fans, claiming that they have no life of their own and comparing them to Mary Lee Walsh in trying to stop him from finding a sweetheart. Hilariously, Chris thinks that he has over a billion fans. Let's put this into perspective: The internet has close to ''two billion users''. Chris thinks he has half of them.
*[[The Wallflower]] - The Wallflower, Chris's latest [[gal-pal]], has been the source of his most recent heartache and anger. In an article in the CWCipedia, Chris shoves the blame on The Wallflower herself, saying that she should never have had a Facebook page or Fanfiction.net page and that, because she refuses to give ''him'' an apology for this, despite the fact it should be ''him'' to ''her'', she will forever hold the guilt of breaking his heart. In addition, Chris claims that the two of them had been seeing each other up until that time when, in actuality, Chris had been [[friend zone]]d once again.
*[[Trolls]] - One of the things that has enraged even casual Christorians is his smugness towards even his trolls. In Chris's own mind, he has came up with the image that they are actually [[homos]]exual [[niggos|blacks]] who are jealous of his work and are slowly becoming autistic by staying on the computer. Furthermore, he has arrived at the belief that they are only jealous of his material goods.
*[[Lars]] - Even though Chris has been known for the longest time to berate [[JERKS|most other males]] for taking all of the [[Boyfriend-Free Girl]]s and leaving none for him, he was more than happy to taunt Lars like a little kid about his breakup with [[Jackie]], acting like he is actually proud of taking her away from him (With liberal use of [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4|racist terms]]) and threatening to [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|to kill him]] should he say anything about it. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|Now there's something to think about]]. However, it should be noted that this [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|isn't the first time]] [[SHE IS MINE NOW|he has done this]].
*[[Love Quest]] A recurring requirement for potential [[boyfriend-free girl]]s displayed most notably on his [[attraction sign]]s and in his [[Sonichu's_News_Dash]] is that they be age 18-[Chris's current age]. One may be tempted to assume he hasn't given much thought to the off-putting, egotistical and misogynistic message implicit therein, but in the latter, he goes as far as to specify "18-21 years of age (18-22 as of February 24, 2004[the date on which Chris turned 22])", demonstrating that although he expects 18 year old girls to be interested in him no matter how old he gets, anyone so much as a ''day'' older than Chris doesn't meet his standards.

===Online===
*[[CWC's Second Message]] - In what would be his opening attack on trying to get the trolls to remove his page following losing Megan, Chris's opening words, amazingly, were:
{{quote|Y'all should know me by now, but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, back on March 17th, 2000.}}
*[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]] - Another shining example of Chris's ego in video form: Chris expects, and even '''demands''', respect from everybody, even though Chris has never shown anybody else any kind of respect. Plus, considering all of the things he's done: adding people to his comic so that he can beat them up, [[mass debating]] on camera, discriminating against others because of [[niggos|race]], [[JERKS|gender]], and [[homos|sexual orientation]], spending taxpayer money on [[Kimmi|sex toys]] and [[PS3|video games]], uploading poorly-drawn [[ShecameforCWC.jpg|pictures]] of himself fingering [[Megan]] to [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], and then blaming them for her breaking up with him; He's never done anything to warrant the respect of '''anyone'''.
*[[LittleBigPlanet]] - When Chris had shown up on LBP community and posted videos addressed to them, he once again said people "should know him by now". He immediately assumed people would praise him for his levels, especially the "Collector's Case", which he thought was the most original LBP level idea ''ever.''
*[[For G4's Web Soup|Web Soup]] - When Chris learned that one of his videos was featured on an episode, he took it as a good thing, not realizing that the show made fun of people on the Internet.
*[[Sonichu's Edge|Chris]] [[CWCFighter|and]] [[51 50|exercise]] - Many times, Chris has shown his attempts at exercising or performing some sort of strenuous feat. He considered [[Power|lifting up a chair]] to be a great feat of strength, thought that lifting two 12-pack boxes was akin to lifting two 50-pound weights and even showed his "amazing" Parkay skills.
*[[Chris and Wikipedia|Chris and famous people]] - Chris has compared himself to [[Hotel Ricky Ricardo|Leonardo da Vinci and Michelangelo Buonarotti]] in artistic ability. He has also compared himself in ability or personality to President [[Barack Obama]], [[SingStar Challenge|Frank Sinatra]], [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|Bing Crosby]], [[Red Skelton]], Dick van Dyke, [[I Love Lucy|Ricky Ricardo]], and Jaleel White (Who voiced Sonic the Hedgehog in the original three Sonic cartoons). He has also compared himself to many fictional characters such as [[Transformers|Optimus Prime]], [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], [[CWC Fighter|Chun-Li]], Homer Simpson and [[Family Guy|Peter Griffin]]. Since free-riding on someone else's talents is nothing new for Chris, he saw no issue into incorporating known people in [[Chandler Family Tree|his family tree]]. This is how [[Anne Boleyn]], [[Daniel Weston]] and an unknown [[Cherokian Clan|Cherokee fellow]] appeared in his ancestry for no logical reason whatsoever. He pushed the audacity to edit many [[Wikipedia]] pages to validate his hubris. All entries have been redacted and he was banned from the site.
*[[Chris E-Mails]] - Chris's massive ego manifests itself eagerly through his correspondence with other people. For example, he e-mailed the O'Reilly Factor, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News at least twice, telling them about his Encyclopedia Dramatica page. Not only did he outright expect them to report on it and give it extensive television coverage, but he expected the FBI (which he also believed was apparently part of the crew for the news shows) to go after Jason Kendrick Howell. Other examples include that while he apologized to Megan for drawing [[shecameforcwc.jpg]], he told her that she owed him money and that he tried to coax [[Anna McLerran]] and Megan into vandalizing his ED page for him. He also believed that people thought their ranking on his [[Scale of Respect]] was of the utmost importance, as illustrated by his correspondence with Mary Lee Walsh.
*[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)|Chris and his ED Page]] - Since Chris is a known narcissistic loon, he never liked mirrors of any kind. When the [[Jason Kendrick Howell|nice folks]] of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] found him, they couldn't resist the urge to satirize his own existence. Said article turned into a circus whereby [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|he tried to retract, modify, erase]] and even supply the page with [[shecameforcwc.jpg|new]] [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!|material]]. In 17 [[December 2009]], he went as far as copying the main article page out of ED and edited out at his convenience.<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Chris_chan]</ref>
*[[CWCipedia|Chris and his own webpage]] - When Chris was given his own webpage, he found himself bombarded with gay ads, all paid for by [[Jack Thaddeus]]. After dealing with this for months on end, Chris finally had enough and proclaimed that he wrote to currently-standing President Barack Obama in an attempt to make gay ads illegal, despite the fact that this kind of ad is still protected under free speech and even if he got the letter, there's a slim (read: zero) chance that Obama will actually listen to his whiny, fat ass. While addressing the matter, Chris proclaims himself ''the captain of this boat'' and says that without him, CWCipedia would not exist, implying that he does all the hard work on the website, ignoring all of the Sysop's efforts. In fact, CWCipedia was a privilege given to Chris and not at all something that he came up with. Chris has taken this to an absolute extreme, going as far as to suggest that he is the "Captain" of CWCipedia.
*[[Sonichu Forum|Chris and the Sonichu Forum]] - When Chris discovered a troll site filed with people pretending to be Sonichu fans, he used it to its maximum possible extent. The notorious [[Mailbag 50]] was made using hand-picked posts from the forum, selected for their copious amounts of ass-kissing. When one troll suggested that Chris [[Sonichu Forum#Chris doesn't own a mirror|wasn't much of a catch IRL]], Chris responded with anger, demanding to know what could possibly make them think that he was anything less than awesome.
*[[CWCki|Chris and the CWCki]] - On 10 March 2010, Chris ended up discovering the CWCki due to the fiasco that lead to his breakup with [[The Wallflower]]. He demanded that all pages concerning him, his family and friends be altered or [[death threats|there would be trouble.]] Noticing the Wallflower's page altered, he took credit for it, not realizing that she had demanded it much earlier and had nothing to do with his earlier rant.
*[[Chris and the Internet|Leaving the Internet]] - No fewer than ''five times'', Chris has boldly claimed that he was "distancing himself from the Internet", that the only way he would be seen would be outside. However, Chris has always returned, anywhere from 36 hours to two weeks after making this bold claim. In a hypocritical sense, Chris hasn't left the Internet - he's left the parts that he doesn't like anymore.
*[[Flipnote Hatena]] - After "distancing himself from the Internet", Chris decided to bide his time on Flipnote Hatena, a website that allows him to post animated creations from the Nintendo DSi program Flipnote Studio. So far, Chris has used it to spread his word over how to deal with trolls by butchering a humorous music video, thinking its creator was thinking the same thing he was, and by creating a set of "tags", listing out a bunch of lies. At the end of [[An Ol' Classic Dream]], he demands that his brainwashed, obedient fanbase give him 5 million stars in exchange for an uncensored version of the already raunchy video. When mods took down his flipnotes, Chris would put them back on, disable comments on his page, then reallow them, posting a flipnote that should be him apologizing for doing so, but talked more about the trolls and his "Internet Rep" than an actual apology.
*[[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|Trollbusters]] - After returning to the Internet, Chris comes up with the idea for a "Trollbusters" group, having made shirts and cars on [[ModNation Racers]]. All of this was done so he can make the Internet safe for himself. Searches through Google, though, reveal that there have been other Trollbuster attempts in the past by other people and, most likely like this one, were doomed to [[fail]].

===Contests===
*[[Harvey Birdman Commercial]] - in an attempt to win a contest involving the animated avian lawyer, Chris went to great lengths to talk about himself, his rivalry with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[Sonichu]], but very, ''very'' little about Birdman himself.
*[[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]] - After losing the contest to [[Adam Stackhouse]], Chris would have a major hissy-fit over the loss, proclaiming even the slightest mistake as cheating, despite the fact that Chris himself had broken numerous rules in the process. Even worse, he attempted to fabricate the PlayStation webpage to show that he himself had won and not Adam.
*[[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes]] - After [[trolls]] caused Chris to win the contest in a misguided attempt to troll the entire gaming community, Chris vowed to spend his winnings (a $400 USD gift card) with his church. Instead, he barely spent half of it towards the church, taking the rest (approximately over 200 dollars) for himself.

===Other===
*[[Mumble 3]] - While talking to Clyde, Chris tells him that the reason why he doesn't have a job is because he has so many awesome skills, he just can't choose one.
*[[Mumble 4]] - When Clyde asks Chris what kind of job he thinks he's qualified for, Chris says, "If anything, I'm overqualified...[for] every type of job available!"
*[[Chris and Health]] - Chris hates to be called fat. Deep in his mind, he honestly thinks he's the same somewhat skinny child he was ten years ago, despite the fact that he has a gut and his hairline's retreating at an alarming rate. While he refuses to accept his baldness, he actually is claiming to be working on his gut. Beyond that, he refuses ''professional'' psychological help and honestly believes stuff such as autism and homosexuality are easily caught diseases.
*[[Homos]]exuality - Chris actually believes that homosexuality is a disease like AIDS or even the common cold. In his comics, he takes a page out of [[Family Guy]] and helps create the cure for homosexuality. Since it questions his own sexuality, he seeks to punish those who are in same-sex relations within CWCVille as well.
*[[CWC Blog#7 January 2010|His Birthday]] - Chris feels that his birthdate (24 February) should be a [[Examples of Chris's Ego#Christian Love Day|national holiday]]; a "Second Day of Love" for [[Chris and his Ego|no valid reason whatsoever]].
*[[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|His Church]] - In a recent [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke|call to arms against Asperchu]], Chris believe he can use his current congregation as a personal army.
*[[Copyright|His copyright]] - If there is one thing Chris takes pride in, it's his "official" Sonichu copyright. With this, he feels as if he can actually make his multimedia empire with no one to stop him. When he first got the paperwork, he boasted it not even a day after he lost Kacey to Liquid Chris, more or less telling her she got stuck with a loser. He also attempted to set up a bunch of videos trying to sell Sonichu to other companies. In his second "I'm leaving the Internet FOREVER" video, he uses the copyright again to boast that he has won over the trolls.
* [[Car Pranks|His answering machine]] - When a number of trolls attempted to call Chris over a Craigslist listing of his car, one of the calls got to his answering machine. The recorded message says that his lawyers and a doctor of some sort advises him not to take any interviews due to too much information being leaked, then calls the trolls "trollin' stupid."
* [[100 2178|Greene County School Board]] - In one video, Chris proclaims that the Greene County School Board, who sought to help Chris when he was younger, initiated a massive conspiracy against him in order to keep him in his "autistic shell". This also included paying off a Realtor to keep their house from being sold and paying off Michael Snyder to keep him out of the GAMe PLACe.
*In a [[Media:HelpHaitSonichu.jpg|one-page spread]] designed to spread awareness of the victims of the earthquake in Haiti (and likely done only in response to a [[:File:Haitihelp.JPG|similar ad]] featuring Asperchu), Chris drew all the human victims being dwarfed by four and a half foot tall hedgehogs. The human children, sitting beside [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|a bunch of furry runts]], are to scale less than a foot tall. Topping it all off was the inclusion of Simonchu in order to spite [[Evan]]. To Chris, it's more important that his (stolen) recolor abominations have more exposure than the people he's trying to help.
*Similarly, the [[:File:Sonichu Rosechu Save McIntire by Cwcipedia.jpg|poster]] ostensibly designed to be a protest sign features the aforementioned recolors more prominently than the [[McIntire Park|message]] of the sign.
*[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction|Forgiveness Blessings]] - Much like his lord and master GodJesus, Chris believes he has the power to forgive those who have sinned against him, essentially the opposite of his [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] attack. Apparently, Chris is so arrogant, he thinks he can use his [[Chris and religion|retard magic]] to cleanse the souls of the [[trolls|wicked mortals]] who dare to play [[Kick the Autistic]] instead of worshipping him, and has done so [[One Blessing, and One Curse|on]] [[Light His Mind's Darkest Hour|numerous]] [[XBox is OK.MOV|occasions]].

==In the comic==

{{quote|I did an AWESOME FUCKIN' JOB|Chris}}

While [[Issue 0]] and [[Issue 1]] do focus on Sonichu, [[Chris-Chan]] takes over as the main character throughout [[Issue 2]], [[Sonichu 5|Issue 5]], [[Sonichu 6|Issue 6]] and [[Sonichu 7|Issue 7]], with [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] as a supporting character, and even when he does appear, he's shouting some retarded praises about Chris. [[Sonichu 8|Issue 8]] and [[Sonichu 9|Issue 9]] see Sonichu taking back his major role as the main character, but he's basically just a Mary-Sue analogy for Chris. The main story arc of [[Sonichu 10|Issue 10]] is the resurgence of Chris and his elimination of every enemy he has so far. He also portrays himself as skinny and handsome (although this doesn't happen till said ''Issue 2'') and will pull powers out of his ass. He even makes several episodes that dramatize events he had in real-life, with the extremely self-indulgent fantasies that are described below.

Chris's ego is in full bloom in the comics. The name of the city in which he and his Electric Hedgehog Pokémon strive to protect is known as [[CWCVille]]. The city's currency is C-Quarters and W-Quarters. One of the major drinks in this city is known as [[CWC Cola]]. The radio station is called "K-CWC"... the hotel is called the "Double CWC" ... even his [[Wikipedia:Hyrule|Hyrule]] ripoff is called "[[RuleCWC]]". Basically, everything is named after Chris. The Sonichus and Rosechus he created proclaim him "father". No one in his city cares if he slacks off from his job as Mayor. He even goes so far as to proclaim that there are no elections when he proclaims [[BILLY MAYS]] is NOT the True and Honest mayor of CWCville.

===Instances of Chris's ego in the comics===
[[Image:Issue4.jpg|thumb|An entire book of Chris hurting people he hates]]
*'''[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]:''' While this is the smallest amount of screen time he's ever had in the comics, he generally steals the scene to himself, Sonichu tries to make a point about how "[[lie|creative]]" the comics are if that, and generally trying to make it seem like he deserves a girlfriend for drawing this retarded piece of [[fail]].
*'''[[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]]:''' Again, Chris's existence in the comics is very minor, confined to Sub-Episodes and a sudden appearance, mocking how ridiculous a singing and dancing [[Robotnik]] is.
*'''[[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]:''' His portrayal of [[Wes-Li Sonichu|Wes-Li]] counts; despite not really knowing Chris in [[Chris and Reality|real life]] he still gets portrayed as a villain. He also openly admitted he didn't want Sarah to see anyone else in a text-walling portion of the comic, yet still calls Wes-Li greedy for not wanting to be a part in CWC's retarded conversations. He also draws [[Sarah]] pinning Wes-Li to a tree & breaking up with him, just because she thought Chris being jealous of her was sweet. He is also drawn whining about how he lost Sarah, and essentially tells Wes to "buck up", even though he's the first one to make a scream when he lost a [[Hannah|one-time date]]. [[Mary Lee Walsh]] also appears as a villain.
*'''[[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]]:''' This issue has a semi-fictionalized account of an incident Chris had with the managers of McDonald's. He was loitering and soliciting, and they threw him out. In his comic book, however, Chris exclaims that the Jerkops are conspiring against him, preventing him from finding true love. He turns into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] and defeats them with the help of [[Darkbind Sonichu]], who admits he only helped because Chris was his creator.
*'''[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]:''' It's all about Chris here. Sonichu and Rosechu are nowhere to be seen, except for one cameo each in separate sub-episodes. This issue was all about Chris's semi-fictionalized misadventures at Wal-Mart, Target and McDonald's, and pitted him constantly against the Jerkops and Mary Lee Walsh, for they dare to interfere with his [[Love Quest]]. Unlike IRL, Chris can (and does) pwn them in the fantasy world of his comics. This issue also includes the account of Chris's encounter with IRL troll [[Hannah]], who raised his [[heart level]] to 100% just to smash it down to 15%.
[[Image:Sammyandchris.jpg|thumb|Chris as he is vs. Chris as he sees himself.]]
*'''[[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]]:''' This issue has Chris write Sarah Hammer out of the comic so he could focus exclusively on [[Megan Schroeder]], the new object of his desire. While Sarah did marry a man named [[William Spicer]], Chris was not present at her wedding, and had never met Spicer, as he was represented in the comic by a generic [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] character. The next episode has Chris fawning over Megan, and she over him. In reality, Megan saw Chris only as a friend, and was constantly rebuffing his advances. The episode features two different endings because Megan either did not like the original ending or objected to being featured in the comic at all.
*'''[[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]]:''' The [[Patti Chandler]] Memorial Issue, where his dead dog becomes a member of CWCville. In the only other episode in this issue, Chris has [[Bionic]] ask him to create a sweetheart for him, but Chris, being a lazy fuck, hooks him up with Megan's character, [[Megagi]]. Chris would later claim Megan's character as his own.
*'''[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]:''' Chris is envious of Bionic's ability to screw Megagi until Megan holds his hand, again implying romance where none exists. This issue contains the stupid time-travel plot where they go back in time to the moment Chris created Bionic, and the scene randomly segues into a [[Family Guy]] style scene he gives Seth McFarlane full permission to use (Coincidentally, or not, the first few minutes of the ''Road to Germany'' episode of Family Guy bears a close resemblance to this "skitch"). After Chris gets trapped in the time void, he mixes both fake memories from the comic with real ones, like Megan "dumping" him and his denial of having drawn [[Shecameforcwc.jpg]] (he blames it on [[ED]], even though he was the one that drew it and uploaded it onto that site), Mary Lee Walsh's invasion of CWCville and her defeat at the hands of the Sonichus and Rosechus, and [[Joshua Martinez]] hooking him up with [[Vanessa Hudgens]]. In the other episode, he introduces his Sweetheart-of-the-moment Blanca and her creation [[Jiggliami]] (who Chris would later claim as his own), as well as featuring an interview with anti-troll [[Robert Simmons V]] about how awesome Chris is.
[[Image:Momentary Escape.JPG|thumb|Chris rends space time asunder to punch some guy. On the plus side, that does look a little bit like him.]]
*'''[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]:''' While free of Chris the character, the comic was not free of Chris's warped psyche. He drew a sex scene between Sonichu and Rosechu for no other reason than to draw porn of his characters, and gave a detailed account of their reproductive systems. Remember, Sonichu is supposed to be a children's comic, as Chris has stated numerous times. After having his characters have sex for the fifty billionth time, he inserts the hideous [[Rule 34]] he drew into the storyline by having Rosechu come across it while using the internet. In a blatant display of Mary Sueism, Chris uses Sonichu to comment on his hideous drawings by saying that they are "so lifelike", and he also has Sonichu gag and barf at the sight of fan drawings from Chris's ED page of Rosechu with a "pickle". Next there are multiple (traced) nude images of Rosechu, which the plot indicates is to prove that she doesn't have a "pickle". Later on, after Sonichu and Rosechu storm [[4-cent garbage.com]] (which is a thinly veiled portrayal of ED), she strips again and face-rapes [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] (the guy who created Chris's ED page), putting him into a state close to death. Even later, all the Rosechus in the comics decide to strip for "[[Women's Rights]]"...well, all except [[Zapina|one underaged one]], who can't strip because of the "[[Chris and sex#pedophilia|dumb laws]]". It must be noted that this entire storyline was a result of Chris being trolled hard by the people over at ED, who drew fan art of Rosechu with a dick to make Chris RAGE...and RAGE he did. An epilogue has former sweetheart [[Sarah Jackson]] killed by [[Optimus Prime]]; another former sweetheart, [[Blanca]], returned to Kentucky and her boyfriend (which makes no fucking sense storyline wise; truth is that she was a troll and Chris failed at writing her out); a two sentence memorial to [[Ryan Cash]]; and a dedication to Sweetheart-of-the-moment [[PandaHalo]].
[[Image:Billboard.JPG|thumb|They're better off without him.]]
*'''[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]:''' Lacking Sonichu to use as his mouthpiece, Chris invented [[Reginald Sneasel]] to use as his stand-in during the first episode, and Reginald even goes to retarded lengths to break up a romance between [[Punchy]] and [[Layla]] in a similar way that Chris meddled with Wes and Sarah. After Reginald's plan fails, [[Angelica Rosechu]] approaches him, and they quickly jump into the sack together, echoing Chris's own belief that the woman must make the first move (out of pity) and put out as soon as possible. This episode also introduces Chris's retarded [[Dating Education]] concept and applies it to his characters. Chris also inserts his Sweetheart-of-the-moment [[Ivy]] into the comics in a plotline that goes nowhere, and has a thinly-veiled version of former sweetheart Sarah Jackson as the Date Ed teacher. Chris then makes a callous reference to Sarah's death by Optimus Prime via a representation of her sister Rita. When Rita informs the class about her sister's death, the assorted characters appear to not give a fuck, nor do they make any attempt to console the poor grieving woman that is now stuck teaching their class. Also in Sonichu 9, Chris depicts PandaHalo dying in a fire. He seems to think this is a fitting tribute. He also shopped a caricature of himself onto a billboard in the background, with a caption begging him to return to the mayor's office. Recent additions have shown the addition of a Power Rangers team, the CWC-Power Rangers, as well as a gruesome description of Ivy dying by being hanged.
*'''[[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]''' With Chris back in the saddle, he proceeds with his master plan to get rid of all of those who troubled him in real life. Even worse, he apparently was able to deceive his future wife into think he was his future self and did the nasty with her. On top of this, he proclaims that he helped create the cure for homosexuality and plans to bring about straightness by stealing all those vaccines, bringing them to the present and distributing them right there! Chris-Chan Sonichu defeats some "devil trolls", but can't resist imitating Zorro and spelling "CWC" in the air with his epic blows and kicks (this could be a trifecta: unoriginal, egotistic ''and'' physically implausible). As the comic continues on, he attacks the 4-cent_garbage HQ, he uses the characters [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] and [[Beel]] to condemn [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Jack Thaddeus]] for being homo trolls who "slander and tarnish an innocent man's good name", the proceeds to make the latter two jump to their deaths, just as he wishes. Even more, he destroys the building, kills about 200 trolls and proclaims that both ED and 4-cent_garbage's websites were lost forever, despite the fact that most websites nowadays have back ups waiting for just such an emergency. Soon after, Magi-Chan returns from the future, reporting that the gay vaccine has/will be proven to be a worldwide success and that [[1982|February 24th]], 2009, (Chris's sense of time is legendary) will be proclaimed Christian Love Day in his honor. Yes, really. And then Chris immediately manages to top this when his God complex manifests itself in the form of [[Collosal Chan]] and [[Ultra Sonichu]]. Both are portrayed as blatantly messianic figures, especially Ultra Sonichu who works like Chris's version of Jesus who saves [[Asperchu]] characters from "[[Liquid Chris|The False God In Brown Strips]]" and Aspergers by granting them the forgiveness of Chris, which can only be received by praying to him. Chris later denied that he tried to set himself up as God, but at the same time he more than insinuated that he is just as awesome. Later in the issue, as he issues an apology over what he had done concerning Asperchu, he puts Alec, Mao, Evan and Sean on a mock trial for the murder of Simonla Rosechu, pull evidence out of their asses and get them sentenced to death, two of which Chris participates in!
*'''[[Sonichu Special 4]]:''' Chris steals [[Kacey]] from [[Liquid]] for "not treating her right", bursts into the house (note that Kacey doesn't seem to be in any real danger), blows out a disarmed Liquid's kneecaps with a [[Megatron pistol|handgun]], and draws Kacey's military family telling praises about Chris, and generally negative comments towards Liquid. However, Karma would later [[Kacey and Liquid Call|come back to bite him]] after Kacey and Liquid read the strip.

==Christian Love Day==

[[Image:Love-Day.jpg|thumb|250px|[[Magi-Chan]] describes Failmas, and expresses his severe disappointment with a startling lack of accuracy. ]]
'''Christian Love Day''' is a proposed holiday mused upon by Chris in the CWC blog entry of 7 January 2010. It made an appearance in [[Sonichu 10]] on the same day. As described in the events of the comics, on 24 February 2009 [[Magi-Chan]] completed his mission of distributing Chris's Gay Vaccine to the world. "[[Chris and religion|Thanks to the blood of Christian Weston Chandler]]," all Homosexuality and (in a startling display of overkill) [[Megan Schroeder|Asexuality]] are eradicated. Chris uses this as an excuse for a second Valentine's Day late in the month. Presumably, the day will be celebrated with unabashed, BUT STRAIGHT, monkey sex.

===Significance===

{{quote|Upon reflection, February 24 SHOULD be a Holiday of sorts (even a Second Day for Love in addition to Valentine's Day), because the day, to me at least, just FEELS like a Holiday, in addition to it being my Birthday. I have looked it up before, and it is some sort of forgettable (Holi)day in Mexico or somewhere. February 24 Should have More Significance and Recognition like a Holiday. |[[Chris]], in his [[CWC Blog]] for 7 January, 2010}}

Chris bases the holiday not only on his horrifically misguided and disturbing Gay Holocaust, but grants it full significance for being his birthday. Chris actually believes a milestone date in his amateur webcomic should be celebrated worldwide, because he "feels" like it should, especially since it "feels" like a holiday to him (neglecting that everyone tends to view their own birthday as a holiday). He attempts to mask this fact with ill-researched hear-say. The "forgettable" holiday occurring on the 24th is [[Wikipedia:Flag Day in Mexico|Mexican Flag Day]], celebrated at most with a flag ceremony in elementary schools and maybe a short lecture on the history of the Mexican flag. This is notable for being both a minor, yet momentous holiday, doubly defeating Chris's point. On a historical note, it was the same day the [[Wikipedia:February_24#Events|Nazi Party]] was founded, way back in 1920.

Interesting to note is the celebration of a "man"(child) giving his [[Navy|"blood"]] to "save" the population of the [[CWCville|Earth]] from [[Homosexuality|"damnation"]]. [[Chris and religion|Chris thinks he's Jesus]]. Big surprise.

===The Declaration===
[[File:Christian Love Day Declaration.jpg|thumb|250px|True and Original Declaration of the Christian Love Day]]
{{quote|Good morning. In less than an hour, Sonichu fans from here will join others from around the world as you will be witnessing the largest personal change in the history of mankind. Mankind...that word should have new meaning for us all today. We cannot be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it is fate that today is Metsico's flllag day. And we will once again be saluting an image of our freedom. Not just from trolling, loneliness, or persecution, but also from heartbreak. We are fighting for our right to love, to be honest, and when the sun sets today, the twenty-fourth of February will no longer be known as only a Metsican holiday, but as today the Sonichu fans declared what wuv was. We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We are going to live on! We are going to survive, to celebr--today we celebrate our CHRISTIAN LOVE DAY!|Chris, totally not [[Things Chris has ripped off|ripping off]] the movie ''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Independence_Day_%28film%29 Independence Day]''}}

Chris is so engrossed by the idea that he went as far as [[Christian Love Day (video)|making a video]] for the occasion, asking his [[trolls|army of fans]] to celebrate his hubris. And to remove any doubt about the issue, he [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|admitted to Alec Benson Leary]] that he does indeed believe he is important enough to have his birthday celebrated across the country. On the other side, he denies ever writing the declaration, claiming a [[Troll|friend]] did it for him, and says he saw the movie ''Independence Day'' only once.

{{clear}}

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Chris and his Ego]]
*[[Sub-Episodes]]

[[Category:Lists]]

Talk:Hair

2010-12-16T17:13:21Z

Rrosai:

Just moved from [[Chris and health]]. Someone write about his hair, hair styles, and how he's losing his hair lately. --[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 07:48, 31 October 2009 (CET)
* Spoiler: can't find a public source but Chris's mom cuts his hair :3. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:11, 15 November 2009 (CET)
in the [[Kacey Phone Call]] Chris says:
Chris: Oh come on you know, ahh...'''I bet his mom probably cut his hair''' and uh, that's uh..I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.
[[User:Starstuff|starstuff]] 06:03, 19 November 2009 (CET)

**I for one find this unbelievable hilarious. Chris is acting like he's one a sit-com. [[User:Graduon4eva|Graduon4eva]] 22:51, 2 January 2010 (CET)
==Male pattern baldness?==

Why do we assume his hair loss is due to a hormone imbalance? Male pattern baldness is genetic and usually turns up in the early to mid 20's. We'd need to know if his maternal grandfather was bald, but it's still a possibility. --[[User:Sonichuis44|sonichuis44]] 01:20, 2 January 2010 (CET)

Most definitely MPB. Look at Cole's hairline.--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 20:21, 18 May 2010 (UTC)
: Agreed. Whilst 28 is probably still in the 'young' side of the MBP age spectrum, by no medical standard would it be considered premature. I'm going to edit the article to reflect this. [[User:Blusko|Blusko]] 14:37, 20 July 2010 (UTC)

==Just an aclaration==

Sonichugirls didn't ask Chris for the hair, he offered it himself, without any prompting, in this email:

"Hey, Cassie. I know you've read my dishy input in the Sonichu Girls Forum. :)

Listen, I've just had my hair cut by my mother (she usually cuts my hair); longest length she had to cut since my early childhood. She put the cut locks of my hair into a bowl that I held in my hands. After finishing, I've put the cut locks into a zip-lock bag, because I have thought of giving a little something back to my loyal Sonichu & Rosechu fans (at least the female half). I am thinking of dividing the locks into 200 sets, taping them onto individual self-created "CWC Certificate" Cards and entrusting them to you to distribute to 199 other female fans on the Sonichu Girls Forum. I know I don't have to do this, but I take enjoyment in being generous and knowing I've put smiles on a grand number of faces.

Please reply and let me know if you are willing to take the responsibility of sharing pieces of me. Your full name and address will be required for me to send the locks to you. Also, after receiving the locks, you may share my home address ONLY with the other ladies on the Sonichu Girls Forum. :)" --[[User:Screwhead|Screwhead]] 18:26, 20 July 2010 (UTC)

== What about a gallery with progression of hairstyles, and balding? ==

--[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 10:50, 6 September 2010 (PDT)
:I'll start off.
<gallery>
Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|
Image:156-CWCMegan1.jpg|
Image:Ecp00066.jpg|
</gallery>

Someone just posted this on /cwc/.

[[Image:CWC-bald-progress.jpg]]

This image is just depressing to look at. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 21:43, 6 September 2010 (PDT)

== Body hair ==

The shirtless videos make me wonder: is there a source as to whether he is naturally so hairless?
:Yes, he's a Cherokee, motherfucker. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 00:39, 16 December 2010 (PST)
:Makes sense. This explanation will allow me to remove the image of Barbara shaving his back from my mind.--[[User:Rrosai|Rrosai]] 09:13, 16 December 2010 (PST)

Monty Python

2010-12-16T17:11:25Z

Rrosai: /* Actual ripoffs */

{{Quote|And now for something completely different.|Quote from the beginning of Monty Pythons Flying Circus}}

{{Quote|...And now for sometycuppitydifferent!|Chris, trying to quote Monty Python through flapping aspie lips}}

[[Image:MSCPython.jpg|right|thumb|Darkbind Sonichu butchers the Merried Seinor Comic; Chris butchers a once-funny joke.]]

[[Monty Python]] is a British comedy troupe formed in the late 1960s by [[Homo|Graham Chapman]], John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle, Terry Jones, and Michael Palin. They created the popular comedy sketch show '''''Monty Python's Flying Circus''''' (or '''''Monty Python's [[CWCFlyingElephants|Flying Elephants]]''''' as Chris calls it) which ran for five years on BBC2, becoming a phenomenon in Great Britain and later developing a strong cult following throughout the English-speaking world. The troupe followed up the TV show by producing three feature films, including the classic ''Monty Python and the Holy Grail''.

Chris is a fan of the Monty Python comedy productions -- he's bought almost [[Chris and money|$50 worth]] of Python videos through his [[List of Chris's PSN video downloads|PlayStation Network]] account -- and as is the case with every other form of entertainment he enjoys, he views them as an excellent source of material to [[Parody|steal]] for his own comics and videos. Due to a minor cultural barrier, he probably doesn't even understand more than half the jokes. In a [[Mailbag_43|mailbag letter]], Chris said that his favorite skit is the "Dead Parrot". This shouldn't be a surprise considering the skit was heavy on slapstick humor.

It is currently unknown whether Chris is aware that Graham Chapman (who, ironically enough, excelled at playing the comic "straight man") was openly [[Homo|gay]], and, in fact, one of the first openly gay men on television, thus making him something of a hero to modern day queer and queer-friendly people. If so, this clearly doesn't stop him from enjoying the show; he is, after all, a fan of ''[[Little Big Planet]]'', despite its narration by Stephen Fry, who is also openly gay, and he (Chris, not Stephen) claims to like lesbian porn. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|As long as they entertain him, Chris is willing to tolerate homosexuals.]]

The show's sense of humor is difficult to categorize. It combines satire, surrealism, cultural references, the deft use of ''non sequitur'', and liberal doses of vulgarity that often made it controversial in its time. One way to define the Python style of comedy, though, might be this: imagine if [[Chris]]'s infamous [[random-access humor]] were actually somehow made funny.

==Chris's interpretation==
[[Image:Bearonhead.jpg|thumb|right|NOTICE THE CLEVER SET-UP DERIVING FROM A TURN OF PHRASE AND OTHE... oh no, you just stuck a fucking [[Lil'_Chris|bear]] on your head.]]
Chris seems to have developed the notion that Monty Python involves putting something [[Autism|idiotic]] in a situation and this will make the scene funny. The fact that he believes this and makes it the basis of his random-access humor shows that he has little to no understanding of the finer facets of the show.

While not always exactly highbrow or remotely esoteric, the show is quite masterful in its comedic devices. If we look at some of the more famous sketches such as [http://people.csail.mit.edu/paulfitz/spanish/script.html The Spanish Inquisition], we see how the Monty Python crew start with what seems to be a humorous scene about jargon and a [[Speech impediment|muffling accent]] is suddenly interrupted by a troupe of medieval clergymen who seek to extract confessions. All this deriving from the use of a language idiom in the beginning of what seemed to be a completely different scene. This is followed by increasingly more absurdist humor based on the Inquisitors.

The formula of a normal situation which has become funny in its own right followed by absurdist humor coming directly out of the use of an idiom is totally lost on Chris. Instead he sees it as SOMEONE SHOUTED SOMETHING RANDOM, IT MUST BE FUNNY.

Even the phrase "...And now for something completely different" that Chris has <s>borrowed</s> <s>ripped off</s> completely mispronounced and massacred was used in the original sketches as a way to lead into new material, but remained ironic because the segue itself ''was'' completely different from the previous sketch. Instead Chris merely uses it to introduce more of his [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_Columbus_Day%2C_2008|bullshit]].

==Attempts to be Pythonesque==
[[Image:Wavingclothes.jpg|thumb|right|No friends want to be in your naked, retarded re-enactments? Or even worse, no friends at all? No problem. Talking to clothes in a funny voice works just as well.]]
If [[CWCFlyingElephants]] is to be our guide to how Chris thinks Monty Python humor is constructed, then we are to believe that things can be funny by skipping around to several random clips with no set-up or basis (while [[Duck|naked]], no less). To top it off, Chris throws in bits of completely unrelated material from ''other'' comedy shows that have humor completely different from Monty Python such as ''[[South Park]]'' and ''[[Wikipedia:Ed Edd n Eddy|Ed Edd n Eddy]]''. The fact that these programs are all known for their own unique varieties of humor doesn't stop Chris from mashing them together in a retarded fashion that he thinks represents Monty Python.

In addition to not involving proper set-up, planning and generally anything clever to the comedy process, Chris also fails to realize that one character having dialogue is confusing. Whereas Monty Python will have either funny monologues related to one topic or derive humor from juxtaposing absurd with the normal, Chris just carries on a conversation with himself and loses all nuances of setting and context.

==Actual ripoffs==
Gags Chris has ripped from Python TV sketches and movies include:

*The catchphrase "...And now for something completely different" (or "somecummpentydifferent" as Chris [[Speech Impediment|mispronounces]] it). This was a running gag on the Python TV shows, part punch line and part segue. It would usually signal the end of a short bit of surreal imagery and lead into something new. In Chris's case, it's a sign that he's about to randomly access something "humorous." See [[CWCFlyingElephants]].

*At the beginning of [[CWCFlyingElephants]], Chris seems to be attempting to channel Monty Python's "Johann Gambolputty" sketch, but all he can muster is "Johann" interspersed with some nonsensical dialog. He then goes on to quote various other sketches, most noticeably a series of "I'd like to see..." lines in which he does an unmistakable impersonation of a "[[wikipedia:Gumbys|Gumby]]".

*[[Darkbind Sonichu]]'s fight with the [[Merried Seinor Comic]] in [[Sonichu 3]]. This is an almost word-for-word imitation of King Arthur (Graham Chapman)'s battle with the [[White knight|Black Knight]] (John Cleese) in ''Monty Python and the Holy Grail''.

*The hedgehog that steals [[Jimmy Hill]]'s teeth in [[Sonichu 10]]. He originally appeared in the "[[wikipedia:Piranha Brothers|Piranha Brothers]]" sketch, where he was named "Spiny Norman," although he never showed any particular interest in false teeth. Chris probably just fixates on anything hedgehog-related. He's obviously failing at both violence and sarcasm.

==Gallery of things which are completely different==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Monty-python-black-knight.jpg|You can see here how Chris has replicated the incredibly humorous dialogue... by numbering it.
Image:Woodpecker.jpg|Because ''[[Wikipedia:Ed Edd n Eddy|Ed Edd n Eddy]]'' is really no different than masters of British, non sequitur comedy. [[Chris and reality|Not in Chris's mind anyway...]]
Image:Wavingarms.jpg|WAVING YOUR ARMS AROUND IS TOTALLY WHAT ERIC IDLE WOULD DO!!!
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Random access humor]]

==External links==
*[[Wikipedia:Monty Python|Wikipedia article on Monty Python]]

[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]
[[Category:Television shows]]

Talk:Hair

2010-12-16T00:19:20Z

Rrosai: /* Body hair */ new section