[[Image:chrisshotweb.jpg|thumb|right|Summary of the incident.]]
After Chris discovered the [[CWCki]] in [[March 2010]], he [[Cwc_blog#14 March 2010|demanded]] that pages related to his family and [[Gal-Pal]]s be removed, giving two deadlines. Around midnight on [[April 2010|1 April]], past the second deadline, he decided to attack CWCki, signing up as [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|GodofThunderGodofWar]]. In true CWC style, his [[Special:Contributions/GodofThunderGodofWar|vandalism]] was [[fail|less than impressive]]. In fact, due to the fact that he made them on April Fools' Day, many users just assumed that it was an elaborate and lulzy prank on the part of the administrators. But no, it was f'real. Christian's posts were aimed at altering the articles he vandalized to make the CWCKi seem to be praising him. As usual Chris's [[Chris and English|tenuous grasp of grammar]] made his edits stand out like a sore thumb.

Although Chris originally demanded that the CWCki's administrators only edit or remove pages related to his friends and family, it is perhaps telling that when he finally set himself to actively vandalizing the site, he ignored those pages, choosing instead to make edits [[Chris and his Ego|glorifying himself]].

(Please note that all times listed are EST.)

==The edits==
===12:35===
His first action was to edit the Did You Know? column, removing the majority of the factoids while adding a few of his own, most of which were merely rewrites of existing comments.

{{quotebox|
*...This webiste, the CWCki, is a LOAD OF BULL?
*...that Christian Chandler ALWAYS IS the mayor of [[CWCville]]?
*...that [[Pixelblocks]] are not to be confused with neither [[Pickles|Pickleblocks]] nor [[Prickly-Wicklies|Pricklyblocks]]?
*...that Chris buys [[McDonalds|healthy food]], [[My Coke Rewards|good drinks]] and just [[PS3|necessities]] with [[Monthly_Tugboat|Good Money]]?
*...that Chris has been recording himself as early as [[Song of Christian|10th grade]]?
}}

Chris left the following factoids untouched:

*...that a [[Curse-ye-ham-ye-ha Retraction|Forgiveness blessing]] can counter the extreme bad luck and misfortune associated with the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] attack?
*...that [[Chris]]'s sense of humor is [[Random-access humor|SO RANDOM XDXD]]?
*...that Chris is the [[The Game Place#Chris.27s_antics|Level Up King]]?
*...that [[Virginia is for Virgins]]?
*...that Chris really likes [[Britney Spears]] (no matter what they all say)?
:*...that his favorite song from "[[:Image:CWCSchuBrit.jpg|Air Britney]]" is ''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHbCK3ETweQ E-Mail My Heart]''?
*...that Chris is a descendant of [[Anne Boleyn]], Queen of England?

Note how he failed to [[autism|notice the sarcasm]] in the above comments.

''Note: In his original edit, the link "10th grade" linked to a non-existent "10th grade" page.''

===12:42===
He then changed the Article of the Now from [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] to himself.

{{quotebox|
[[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|right|200px|lolwut.]]

'''Christian Weston Chandler''' (born '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]) is a [[autism|high-functioning autistic]] [[virgin with rage|virgin]], Honest, Cool and Honest Dude, and creator of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[Chris and his Ego|brilliant]] character, starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].

His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of most Normal Human Beings; Finding their Meaning of Existence, Their [[Love Quest|True Love]], Their own [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Self-Character]]. No One should ever interfere or ever make a mockery of such a [[Chris and English|tride]] and true quest to finding HIS own Happiness with [[Women's Rights|his]] WOMAN who is to be his Wife.

Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter.
}}

This edit is stands as perhaps the most condensed essence of Christian to ever emerge in pseudo-paragraph format. Between the utter butchery of the English language, blatant ego stroking, and unintentional creepiness ("Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter") Christian pretty much manages to sum up what legions of trolls have spent nearly half a decade trying to record for the world. Also note that, while on a website
dedicated to trolling him, he still inserts links to other parts of the wiki. In all likelihood, Chris planned to vandalize these elements as well but stopped due to [[Stress|stress]].

''Note: In his original edit, the link "brilliant" linked to a non-existent "brilliant" page.''

===12:44===
A couple of minutes after, he made the infamous [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]] the Picture of the Now.

{{quotebox|[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|300px|left|lolwut?]]

A recently leaked image shows an illustration by [[Chris]] having [[Chris and sex|Sweet, Sweet Sex]] with three young women, including a white one, a black one, and one in-between.[[Random-access humor|Chocolate-Vanilla Swirls!!! YAY! 8D]]}}
''Note: In his original edit, the link "Sweet, Sweet Sex" linked to a non-existent "Sweet, Sweet Sex" page.''

==TL;DNR==

Chris, despite being given a chance to strike back at trolls in the most direct way ever, managed to fail due to his own ego.

==See Also==
* [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]

{{Lists}}

[[category:Lists]]

DJ Jamsta

2010-12-18T21:33:11Z

SandwichSonichu:

[[Image:Jamster.jpg|130px|thumb|Jamsta covering the gay pride march]]
{{quote|
"Hey guys, gals, [[Chris|duds]] ''[sic]'' and dudettes of all ages! We are rockin' hawt at Cwcville Beach for Spring Break '08! Y'all know me as Jamsta Sonichu, da DJ with da power!"|DJ Jamsta, laying it down}}

'''DJ Jamsta''' is a [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]] [[Wikipedia:Disc jockey|DJ]], and a host on [[KCWC]] radio station. His origins are unknown; ''Sonichu'' historians suspect he was plagiarized from a better comic. DJ Jamsta is known for using out-of-date slang and making sexist remarks towards women. Even by ''Sonichu'' standards he is particularly ridiculous-looking. He looks kind of like if the beginning sequence to ''[[Wikipedia:Saved by the Bell|Saved by the Bell]]'' fucked [[Sonic the Hedgehog]].

One of the most notable traits Jamsta possesses is an odd lack of consistency in coloring across his body. It's also not entirely clear if his ears are just a different color than the rest of his fur or if he just has a spectacularly terrible hat. Of note, if they ''are'' his ears, then his earphones rest on the side of his head, far away from anywhere they would be of any use. Jamsta's arms are also the tan color Chris usually uses for human skin. While possible that Jamsta shaves off his arm hair for whatever reason, it's vastly more likely Chris can't even keep color straight for even that long. It is also notable that Jamsta has a fan-shaped tail not seen in any other Sonichu. It is colored in three bars that match his shirt, but no part of his actual body.

==Not cool==
[[Image:328-Jamsta.jpg|thumb|right|COOL DUDE]]
[[DJ Jamsta]] is a symbol of what Chris thinks is cool, which is why Jamsta is so very uncool. Chris uses some of DJ Jamsta's lines in his [[Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE|future message]]. Like Chris trying to act "with it", Jamsta sounds much more like a marketing executive parroting lines for credibility then an actual "cool" character, throwing (what Chris considers to be) trendy words into his speech without much logic.

==Age Mistakes==

Along with [[Lolisa Rosechu]], DJ Jamsta Sonichu is somehow inexplicably older than the "original" Sonichu; his age is shown as 21 at the end of episode 17 in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], while, near the start of episode 18 (which is set months after episode 17 occurred), Sonichu becomes 20 years old. This leaves a logical inconsistency: if Jamsta is older than Sonichu, wouldn't he name the species of [[Pokémon]] to which he and the rest of the male Hedgehogs belong?

Chris addresses this in [[Mailbag 2]].

{{quote|"Yes, that is correct. Jamsta and Lolisa hatched somewhere private, and their species was not classified with the Professors until about 1990."|--ChrisChanSonichu 00:33, 22 [[November 2009]], [[Mailbag 2]]}}

Of course, Chris's explanation only created more questions. In fact, it makes even less sense than before. For example, it doesn't explain where Lolisa and Jamsta came from in the first place, how they met each other, and why he is running a radio station. Also, the implication that they were hatched together is somewhat problematic, and adds all manner of pseudo-incestuous undertones to their relationship. Of course, since all the characters seem to regard Chris as a father figure in some warped sense, that's pretty much par for the course.

{{Sonichu}}
{{Not_Jerks}}

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[[Category:Characters]]