CWCki - User contributions [en]

Template talk:QuitCount

2010-11-27T18:00:36Z

Shinji:

== Attempts to leave the internet ==
For the purposes of this counter, an attempt to leave the internet refers to a video where Chris announced he was leaving the internet. Technically (as of writing this message) he has only really quit the internet about 3 times. Chris uploading a video is not necessarily him breaking his vow to quit - take [[100 2188|27 May 2010]] & [[100 2189|31 May 2010]] for example. The second video is more of a follow-up to the first - the second video is not a fresh quit attempt, but more a repeat of the announcement made in the first video.

However, it's fun to exaggerate on CWCki (where exaggeration is not just making shit up). If anyone has a reason why we should stick to the TRUE AND HONEST quit count, feel free to say so. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 10:43, 25 November 2010 (PST)
*Hard to say if he's ever escaped from the internet's warm embrace (PSN, logging into Youtube, etc.), but I agree that it's fun to exaggerate. [[User:Shinji|Shinji]] 10:00, 27 November 2010 (PST)

Is this really necessary? We've had counters for all sorts of things in the past, but all of them were prone to change on a daily basis. This is basically a static fact, and although it's interesting to know how many days he's been offline, the rest is not really necessary in a counter because it's not going to change for at almost 3 months (which would change the "longest quit attempt" thing by loloneday).
tl;dr: Keep the "days offline" thing, but the rest has no place on the front page. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 15:58, 25 November 2010 (PST)

User:Clydec/500Internal

2010-10-27T03:18:18Z

Shinji: /* If we do take this */

This is where you discuss the 500 internal server error. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 18:44, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
:My stress tests have all returned with the expected result, or with a diff parser timeout (which is probably not something to worry about since 30 seconds is pretty generous and any diffs that can't complete in that time are nearly always vandalism). No 500 errors experienced. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 11:34, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

==If we do take this==
$180 a year. HEY CWCKI PEOPLE, YOU SHOULD CHIP IN IF YOU LIKE THIS NEW HOSTING. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 14:24, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

That's not bad at all [[User:Ash link|Ash link]] 19:38, 26 October 2010 (PDT)
*My bad, it turns out the cwcki is really popular when people are awake. $300 a year plz. MONEY PLZ. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 20:01, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

Hey, the search bar worked without seizing up. Good job, new host! [[User:Shinji|Shinji]] 20:18, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

A Public Announcement for Congress

2010-10-20T17:25:06Z

Shinji: SMTP doesn't allow you to do exactly that, Chris.

'''A Public Announcement for Congress''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]]. The "for Congress" part apparently represents some confusion or misconception, because the video actually consists of a stump speech directed at the American people, outlining the policies Chris would advance if he were president.

Chris offers a number of initiatives that would give [[tugboat|free money]] to [[Bob|senior citizens]] and [[Inos|the homeless]], while also proposing that taxes be slashed to a tiny fraction of their current rates. In addition, he suggests that all guns should go to the [[jerkops|police]], and the citizenry could only go armed in case of attack from [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|another nation]] or [[Chris and reality|another planet]].

Though he's billed himself before as a "moderate," most of his prescriptions come from the extremes of the political spectrum: a massive welfare state (extreme left), massive tax cuts (extreme right), confiscation of all firearms (extreme in any case). His stance on gay rights is reasonably moderate, though. [[Homos|Gay people]] would be accepted in his [[CWCVille|Utopian society]], so long as he didn't have to notice that they exist.

In yet [[Twin Falling Towers|another display]] of Chris's patriotism, he calls the [[United States of America|United States]] the United Nations, and refers to it as a city. Whether this is him wanting to expand his control to other nations or a legitimate mistake is unknown.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Public Announcement for Congress
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ghfoOqS2mM8}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Politics}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = VA Red Cross Blood Donor
| previous = [[Vitameatavegamin]]
| next = [[Pregnant Act#The Remake|Pregnant Act]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[Image:Dope1.jpg|thumb|CWC [[2008]]]]

Good evening, friends. As your presidential candidate, I will now state how I feel [''Chris makes an odd kicking motion.''], what we can do to improve this, [[United States of America|these nations, these states]]. For one thing, we got so many [[Inos|poor people out on the streets]]. I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have soup beds. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS! So that there would be a bed for every homeless person until they can get back up on their own feet. Also, lower taxes. I will propose lower taxes, and we shall not have to pay so much. Five percent is okay, but why not two point five percent? And we will not cut off any benefits for the old people. They are good. And we shall give them plenty of money so they can afford the medications and services to keep them alive, because we do not pay for when we are sick, we pay for our [[Chris and health|good health!]] And we only pay after we're healthy. We're in good health. We pay to stay alive, we do not pay to die.

And, speaking of which, too much [[Sonichu 10|violence]] goes on within these city streets. I will propose only gun distribution to the official authority, which shall be the post-, which shall be within the [[Jerkops|police departments]]. Nowhere else. And all guns owned by locals, community people, shall be taken away. At least the bullets. When the bullets are necessary, or when there is an outbreak of violence from another [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|nation]] or [[Chris and reality|planet]], then we shall issue the bullets. At all-, at free stations, to be opened immediately. Otherwise we'll send in our special troops. Our [[Chaotic Combo|special force]].
[[Image:Retard-soldier.jpg|thumb|Special Forces don't approve of Chris's shit]]

[''A long pause, where Chris becomes visibly agitated.'']

And also [''another pause''], we will be okay to have the gays [''He noticeably grimaces.''] within our community, we will be okay to have the gays within our community. In all states! There will be gay marriage ability for every state within the [[Fail|United Nations]]. I mean, keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody, 'cause mup- the- mag- [[Family Guy|what may be right for you, may not be right for most. For some. You take the good from the bad and then you get an opening statement like mine.]]

People need to appreciate life, so we will not have to face death. [[Autism|I lost my train of thought there]], but that's okay. I am only human! We are all human! I am a noble, [[honest]] person. No matter what e'erbody else may say, even on the Internet, and my opponent, [[Clyde Cash|Señor Cachez de Clyyyyde]]. He tells liiies about me! And so do the trolls that have be-trolled me over the Internet. Their jeers, and non-cheers, do not go appreciated. Because it is not everybody who can take a joke. Even when it's at their own expense.

And with that, I will propose Internet securities, reinforced by the FBI, and there will be patrol stations of the Trollbusters around these United States. Any repor-, any troll activity that you may be suspicious of an individual, you report to your local authority! And they will tell, and then they will inform the local FBI station within that state. And then they will investigate thoroughly! Over the wireless that is called the Internet! And they will [[Wikipedia:Simple_Mail_Transfer_Protocol#Security_and_spamming|trace the e-mails back to the origin home address or location]]. And they will be apprehended and fined or sentenced, depending on how CRUEL they are to the [[Chris|victim]].

I stand strong, I stand firm, I AM A NOBLE LEADER! And if I am elected, I will do my best to keep our America strong and sound, and not go down the drain. I'm sorry, [[Obama]], I did vote for you, but [[:File:SchuComic9Page19-C.jpg|I gotta agree with my father]], you are bringing us, somuss- some of the situations downhill. But I have nothing against you because I did vote for you. And I liked your documentary on A&E. I would shake your hand at the first opportunity I would to meet you, Mr. President.

And thou- er- fore, I shall conclude my opening statement. In the candisacy of the president, I say, I will do my best! And I am not lazy! Thank you.

This ad is not real. I'm not being, going to be elected president, but I tell the truth nonetheless of what I would do if I were to become president. Thank you.

== Notes ==
Chris tries to translate Clyde Cash's name into [[Spanish]], failing miserably. As you don't translate names, but if one did, it would be ''Dinero'', not "Cashez", and the last name would still go last. Also, "de(l) ___" suffixes tend to be titles and honorifics. Thus, if names were to be translated, Clyde may be ''Claudio Dinero del Oro'', lit: "Clyde Cash of the Gold."

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan Political Ad
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8ojhq6qnBrE}}
| Maker = DrNurse
| Stardate = 19 October 2010
| Video Type = PSA
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Vitameatavegamin]]|nextlink=[[Pregnant Act#The Remake|Pregnant Act]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

File talk:Dancing.gif

2010-06-20T18:07:38Z

Shinji:

Jesus Christ! WTF is that? is that the real speed or was it slowed down[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 21:02, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:That's about real speed. It wasn't exactly rave music. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 21:03, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:3rd video in the vid section of the article, or i think the second to last on the guy's youtube. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 21:31, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:Actually it's sped up. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 21:32, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
::Wow, that's so horrible its not even funny.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 21:38, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

I love how he frightens that child away and doesn't even realize it.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 22:24, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
*And now we wait for this to either be spread around the 'net or become an YTMND. --[[User:Eniggy|Eniggy's waiting...]] 00:09, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

My favorite part is how you can see the guy in the foreground shaking his head. --[[User:Mexican|Mexican]] 17:24, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
*The magnitude of his fail is hard to take in all at once. Maybe he saw the muscle bra? [[User:Shinji|Shinji]] 18:07, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

== LOOK AT THAT LEFT ARM GOD DAMN ==

Everybody do the Dislocated Elbow?-[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 02:36, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
*It's always been that way. It definitely didn't happen in a horrible mass-debating accident. [[User:Shinji|Shinji]] 18:07, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

CWCki talk:Frequently Asked Questions

2010-06-07T22:46:58Z

Shinji:

*I thought this might be a good idea. I had a few more questions but I forgot them due to stress. If it's a dumb idea, feel free to delete it. I'll understand. And cry :( [[User:Loli-tan|Loli-tan]] 09:00, 6 May 2009 (CEST)
**This was something I was actually going to suggest, and it's a lovely Web 1.0 way of addressing some common concerns about Chris. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:04, 6 May 2009 (CEST)

*Added a few more questions today, trying to go for general knowledge as opposed to repeating what you can find in the Misconceptions thread on PVCC. Although, we might want to bring that over here and incorporate it into this article at some point. Feel free to keep adding questions!! I like the last question (11 currently) though in terms of it being the "final one" so I'd recommend keeping it as the last one. [[User:Loli-tan|Loli-tan]] 07:41, 8 May 2009 (CEST)

*There should be a FAQ concerning his college education. People still assume that he earned an Associate's Degree, which people give credit Chris more than he deserves. The retard earned an Associates of Applied Science, which is the equivalent to a degree from a vocational school.[[User:Decoy Octillery|Decoy Octillery]] 02:16, 29 May 2009 (CEST)

*The questions and answers should be sorted into maybe categories, or at least moved around so important questions (like "Why doesn't he just get a prostitute?") are towards the top and less important ones ("Was Ivy imaginary?") towards the bottom. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:12, 21 October 2009 (CEST)

*In the FAQ about him being a possible pedofork, one of the arguments given was the fact that he's often described himself as "young at heart." I took that out, because I interpret his "young at heart" statement as a euphemism for his own childish tendencies, not an indication of any preference for underaged partners.[[User:Senzuri|Senzuri]] 09:16, 2 January 2010 (CET)

*"Chris does understand the consequences of his actions" - Are we sure of this? I'm only a newb to this whole business, but the more I watch and read of him the more I question how much he actually does understand. He seems to be in the mindset that he's the hero in an RPG or a children's TV show, where everything works out in the end as long as he 'learns a lesson' during the 'episode' (translation: Goes through a shallow 'growth' where he says to the camera "I now know to/not to X Y Z"). He seems to understand that actions cause reactions, but not that they have consequences. Watch everything he says and does, when his actions cause harm to others he has no conception of this at all (possibly due to lack of empathy, I admit), and when his own actions backfire it is always because of other people, never because of consequences of his actions. Hell, even look at the recent Alec phone calls where he promises to act in a certain way, then simply doesn't follow through on the promise. I am not convinced he understands his actions have consequences. The closest I have seen to evidence of this is that he thinks "If I say X person Y will do what I want" without conception that there is more to the equation than that. -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 09:39, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

*I have a dreadful feeling of inevitability that Chris's life will violently spiral out of control one day, and, whatever results from that, there will be nationwide attention and an Oprah special on CWC. It would be an interesting subsection in the FAQ to have some sort of mock-interview between Generic Talk Show Host and some CWCkinators that were in-the-know about him before the media attention. We should be able to articulate Chris-chan's true nature when pitted against an nation full of angry soccer moms. [[User:Shinji|Shinji]] 22:46, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

Talk:I Pimp My Ride.MOV

2010-05-09T01:56:25Z

Shinji:

Tried to transcribe dis bitch, I have no idea what he says before he say pimp my ride. Feel free to improve on it. Why I'm doing this and not sleeping is quite the mystery. --[[User:Fearfulsymmetry|Fearfulsymmetry]] 07:02, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

You did a better job then I did I half the time couldn't understand him [[User:Shawths|Shawths]]

* He's saying "I did spend a bit of dough on my grill" but stutters before that. Dough means money and grill usually refers to shiny gold tooth caps that the rappers wear, or one's face ("he was all up in my grill"), and not one's gaming console. Also "ride" never refers to a game controller, or a Lego car, no matter what you do to it. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 07:23, 5 May 2010 (UTC), white guy
** You see Mr Anaconda, you are using logic, not Chris-chan logic.
*** You got it right Anonymous. If Chris heard someone looking Badass say it, he will use it as his new magical mantra. That's how this pimp rolls. (Yes, I am white as snow). [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 14:02, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

==Well==

I couldn't help but fucking lol. Chris semi-permanently damaged his most prized posession. It's like if the trolls convinced him to destroy the [[Blanca|medallion]] or got him to give up the monthly tugboat. Too bad Chris appears to use a cable to access the intertubes or this would have been perfect. I am pleased. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 07:50, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

*Also, LOOK AT THOSE TITS GODDAMN. They're actually bigger than some girls I know. Additionally: LOOK AT THAT BALD GODDAMN. And his accent, and how smug he is that he "beat" the trolls, and, and, and just everything. Just fucking everything. This is definitely one of the funniest videos in a while. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 08:50, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

:*Fucking Lol. Taking all bets on how long it takes him to figure out he no longer has internet.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 08:59, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
::*Well, he was able to upload this video, so like I said before he probably has a cable for his PS3. Not that it's at all possible to tell in the landfill he calls his room. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 09:00, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:::*I think he's using his digital camera. The PSEye, it would seem, has finally been laid to rest. This being the Case he probably won't notice until he tries to buy more useless shit on PSN, and discovers that he can't sign on. That will be the most delicious moment of all.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 09:03, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
::::*The PSeye can be seen in the background, still mounted on his TV. However, it could be broken, and he might just be holding onto it because he's a packrat. --[[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 09:23, 5 May 2010
:::::*Chris did say that his parents are packrats (ie. hoarders), so it's logical that Chris would hold onto something even after it's no longer able to function. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 17:12, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

:For some reason i feel this video falls under chris and race. Maybe is him trying to sound "Gangsta", but either way its still creepy.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 03:18, 7 May 2010 (UTC)

Man, Chris-chan is a stupid little bitch. Let's go for something more than his fucking PS3.
If he wants to be a little ignorant dumbass and go "PIMP MY RIDE! PIMP MY RIDE"

- Captainult

Jesus fucking christ. Chris' videos always make me want to facepalm, but a mixture of cringing and bile fascination keeps me watching them the whole way through. In the end, I'm left with my mouth agape, and only a minute or two after watching the video do I start to react. Fucking hell, legos on a video game controller as an assertion of his victory. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 15:51, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

== How come the first thing I noticed ==

...was that he's wearing a decade old t-shirt from high school? --[[User:Espanolic|Espanolic]] 10:42, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

*The first thing I noticed was his massive, enormous tits.--[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 11:05, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
**Me too. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 14:47, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:* Do we have a vintage photo of him in the T-Shirt? It would do a great Before/After shot for the Obesity page. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 14:02, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
::* Shit, that rack. --18:55, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:::* I remember back on /cwc/ where we had a discussion about Chris's weight and most people agreed that Chris couldn't get any fatter because his high metabolism prevents his body from gaining any more weight. This latest video has proven us all wrong. He has certainly gotten fatter since the last video, and his enormous manboobs are proof of that. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:23, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
::::* Considering 1) he's nearing 30 and his metabolism should be bottoming out soon and 2) he can't "parkay" for more than 5 minutes without having a fucking heart attack, we can only expect him to get fatter and fatter. --[[User:DonB|DonB]] 19:20, 7 May 2010 (UTC)

==Performance style==
this video isn't really "crazy" i think we need a new one called "smug" or something.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 14:43, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:I've never seen a sane person use Legos to indicate that he's pimped his ride. That seems pretty crazy to me.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 14:53, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:: To me it's not crazy, it's just very very stupid, and the video is more about him thinking he outsmarted the trolls, and in comparison to other videos this isn't really insane.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 15:47, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
::: You could call it Comeuppence? It'd look like this >:). It could also be applied to other acts of smugness like when he got his copyright certificate or the rollin' & trollin' video. I have no idea how to make one or implement it however. Oh god how did this get in here I am not good with computers [[User:Menth|Menth]] 20:41, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
::::Comeuppence sounds just fine, I'd like to see how it <s>cums</s> comes out.--[[User:Kei|Kei]] 23:14, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:::::I envision the name to be more like "Victorious" and the face to be more like ^_^ --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 23:26, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:::::: Comeuppence is a CWCism though. Who's making it? I really have no idea how to do it otherwise I would. [[User:Menth|Menth]] 08:58, 6 May 2010 (UTC)
:::::: Yeah only it's a CWCism for semen, and I don't think Chris is cumming in these videos. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 09:44, 6 May 2010 (UTC)
: @Anonymax, he's clearly coming over these videos if not necessarily in them. I demand a new comeuppance category; the Liberal Democrats lost and I need cheering up. [[User:Menth|Menth]] 10:41, 7 May 2010 (UTC)
:Maybe this could fall under reason, though comeuppance would be a good category name.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 03:31, 7 May 2010 (UTC)

Made it & applied it to a few videos. Fuck knows how, I have a masters in theatre which strictly makes me a retard at anything useful. Opinions? {{Comeuppance.png|text}} [[User:Menth|Menth]] 07:10, 8 May 2010 (UTC)
:Most excellent, good sir. This category is essential to get the big picture of his video antics. [[User:Shinji|Shinji]] 01:56, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==Art request==
Art request for this article; find an image of a busty chick and overlay it over Chris to show how big his tits are. Fuck. Chris is... Uhgh. He somehow seems to have lost weight in this video, but his tits are just massive. I guess that's why they call him Collosal Chris-Chan... -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 16:22, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
*Collosal Tits-Chan, even. [[User:Lord Snotfolus|Lord Snotfolus]] 19:56, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:*I like you, good sir. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 23:37, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

==Money==
Did someone lose some today?--[[User:Robotnik|Robotnik]] 21:43, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

==Cable or WiFi?==

Does Chris actually use the wifi, or does he connect his PS3 with a cable? He seemed to know what the part he removed did, which leads me to favour the former. It's still hilarious. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 23:37, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
:A quick view of the [[Chris humps his PS3|PS3stiality video]] seems to show a cable plugged in to the back of the console. It looks like an ethernet cable, but someone who actually owns a PSTriple might be more qualified to know if the position of the ethernet socket on the console matches the cable we see on the video. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 23:47, 5 May 2010 (UTC)
* Given the fact that he knowingly states that he removed the wi-fi, I would venture a guess that he does indeed use a cable. Without being able to connect to his PSN, he can't impulse buy any more needless crap for his PS3. The real test will be weather he can remove the entire bug in his system ;) --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 19:57, 5 May 2010 (EST)
:Well I assumed that he uses a cable now, I was more trying to prove that he has always used a cable rather than just converting to using it now he has removed the Wi-Fi adapter. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 00:01, 6 May 2010 (UTC)

File talk:CWCipe-tan.jpg

2010-02-21T02:15:29Z

Shinji:

Fucking brilliant--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 09:19, 31 December 2009 (CET)

Is...is that an external power supply? Will she only last five minutes without it? [[User:Shinji|Shinji]] 02:15, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Shinji

2010-02-19T03:15:30Z

Shinji: Making my user page...

{{Americunt}}{{OperationMailbag}}

==<s>Shinji</s> Gendo==
Gendo, a.k.a. the Uberpimp, thinking of new ways to make <s>Shinji's</s> Chris's life a living hell.
[[File:GendoPose.jpg]]
==Stuff I might have done==
*Transcribed the long video over [[I_am_Alive|here]].
*Occasionally made witty banter over on [[Fail|this]] page, back before the Great Restore when I was known as Stotan.
*Sent an e-mail that appeared in [[Mailbag 39]] and another one in [[Mailbag 54]].

File:GendoPose.jpg

2010-02-19T02:58:29Z

Shinji: Uploaded for my User:Shinji page. Gendo, thinking of new ways to make Chris's life a living hell.

Uploaded for my [[User:Shinji]] page. Gendo, thinking of new ways to make Chris's life a living hell.

I am Alive

2010-02-05T21:46:41Z

Shinji: Added transcript for the "I'm alive and well" video. Feel free to fix any mistakes.

Fix me!

Part 1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84ye0PybM1I 
===Transcript===
C-log February 4th, 2010
First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make. Don't listen to that stupid Alec and his stupid advertisements. Don't I look dead to you? No, I'm alive, safe, well, and healthy. That's for the announcements. I'll admit Alec has a sizeable fanbase, possibly greater than my own, currently. Uhh, I had--I originally had permission for using Simonchu in my comics from Evan, but then he took it away. Simonla was not mine, so I'm giving it back to him by killing her later. Uhh...I admit editing small article, I'll just delete it altogether later today--or later on. I apologize to Alec for calling him naive multiple times. And, uh, I apologize to Mao--here's a Forgiveness Blessing. Forgiveness Blessing ::shoo:: there you go. Uhh...I just been--forgive me, but I just had to dig a bunch of snow. It's snowing now. My car's stuck. And I apologize to Alec for--for taking Asperchu and his--rec--and his recreated characters for re-editing and whatnot. A comic pa--There'll be a page later explaining all that. There's another apology I made to him earlier about pretending my mother...hmm. I apologize for accusing him for female entrapment and..uh...rumors about rape. It was never meant to be rape. It was just like you know...he had to--he had those four Rosechus in his basement. Kept 'em in cages. Treated them like hamsters. Ham--giant hamster wheel. Water bottle. Food pellets. No rape. Just hamsters. You don't rape a hamster. And I had no excuse for not updating on some days, but real life just happens, though. That's my only excuse. Real life, other than that, I have no excuse. And uh, I apologize for disrespect in the mailbags and belating updates. Yeah, so with that. I'll leave you all with that, and I'm alive, safe, well. Okay, have a good day.

Part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPENY0rE3Hs