CWCki - User contributions [en]

Talk:Calling Out

2011-08-11T19:18:31Z

Smtp: /* Piping */ new section

{{Not_A_Forum}}

transcribing--[[User:Crooked tooth|Crooked tooth]] 12:42, 6 August 2011 (PDT)
Sorry i cant transcribe my computer is fucking up--[[User:Crooked tooth|Crooked tooth]] 15:24, 6 August 2011 (PDT)
The ''Calling Out "Tito" - Don'' video says it's unavailable =/ --[[User:Elliebytes|Elliebytes]] 12:53, 6 August 2011 (PDT)
:At the moment there is a problem with the video (probably Chris being a dumbass). It's viewable on his YouTube channel page, and I'm about to upload a backup until we can get it on the CWCVilleLibrary. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 12:54, 6 August 2011 (PDT)

Do we really want to be talking about the pix on here? Someone might read it. -[[User:BrianBash|BrianBash]] 15:35, 6 August 2011 (PDT)
: We won't know the true authenticity of the photos until Chris surrenders them. Until such a time, please refrain from theories as to who might be depicted in the photos. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 16:34, 6 August 2011 (PDT)

== Tomboy/Tomgirl forum ==

I cannot believe that stalking him actually lured him out of his "retirement."

== Hiatus Stats ==

This video hiatus from November 22, 2010 to August 6, 2011 was '''257 days long.'''

This is not Chris's longest hiatus from Youtube. The gap between [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]] and [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]] was '''270 days long'''.

*I used the date calculator on timeanddate.com to compile this and I did not include the end date. I don't know if this belong on the actual Calling Out page or somewhere else. So I'm just writing it here for reference. Feel free to add the info to this or another article. -- [[User:Crow|Crow]] 18:28, 6 August 2011 (PDT)

Went ahead and added this to the [[Chris and the Internet]] page. [[User:Dantz|Dantz]] 20:18, 6 August 2011 (PDT)

I find it funny how his self-introduction is still word for word from one of his [[Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_August_3rd,_2008|earliest videos to the fandom]]- shows how little he's changed. Signfiicant enough to add to the video's description? --[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 01:46, 9 August 2011 (PDT)

== Billboard, events, and Heather ==

Chris mentions being on a billboard in New York. Do we have any pictures of that? Do we have any information at all about the previous events to lead up to this?? And is the Heather he spoke of "Wallflower". If so, I think it's note-worthy that we mention that he still says they were dating at one point when she has said before (multiple times) that they weren't. If it isn't Wallflower...we need to find out who the heck she is. --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 22:15, 6 August 2011 (PDT)
: Yes, yes, and yes. And yes: Chris is delusional.--[[User:Henry Bemis|Henry Bemis]] 22:29, 6 August 2011 (PDT)

:: To answer your questions, Vans shoes had some promotion at the end of 2009 where people could submit photos that would go up on a billboard in Times Square. There were over 4 submitted of Chris by various trolls. The pics are probably somewhere, but I can't find them... Also, for the record, the Wallflower has a standing agreement with the CWCki not to be publicly identified. she shall be referred to only as the Wallflower, as we are true and honest, unlike Chris. --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 22:45, 6 August 2011 (PDT)

::*I haven't gotten a chance to closely watch the videos, but how to handle the mention of the Wallflower is addressed [[CWCki:The Wallflower|here]]. Her name stays in the transcript but there's to be no linking and such. Also, the billboard images are [[20_December_2009|here]].--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:23, 6 August 2011 (PDT)
:::* Ah, I apologize for my naivety on this matter. I feel that to keep the agreement with her, if it is necessary, this part of the talk (that violates the agreement) should be deleted. --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 10:37, 7 August 2011 (PDT)
:::*Speaking of that, he's saying that they ''had'' dated (calling her his "ex-girlfriend" in the video). Would it be safer to go ahead and change her name to "The Wallflower"?--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 18:41, 7 August 2011 (PDT)
::*So is linking from a ''Wallflower'' page (or from a ''Wallflower'' section of another page) to this page also verboten? --[[User:BrianBash|BrianBash]] 20:26, 7 August 2011 (PDT)
:::*If you mean linking The Wallflower's real name or reference to her to The Wallflower page, then yes, that is forbidden. I'd say same goes with any modifier, like if we were to link "ex-girlfriend" to [[The Wallflower]], pretty much anything that connects that person's name with the status of the Wallflower. Now personally, it's getting kinda silly because Chris keeps dropping her name BUT nonetheless we have an agreement to keep and we're not total jackasses. Her name should definitely remain in the transcript though, accurate transcription is crucial. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:57, 8 August 2011 (PDT)

== Spoiling the Fun ==
After seeing him demand money, I just had to respond to him directly. I sent him the following PM.

<blockquote><TT>
On the threshold of legal trouble. 
>"But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH. American. Unmarked billssss," 

You do realize that Extortion is a crime. Doing so through the United States Postal Service crossing state lines makes it a federally prosecutable offense. You'd be wise to remove your "Calling Out" videos before they get mirrored and used against you in a court of law. 
</TT></blockquote>
[[User:LordCustos3|LordCustos3]] 09:36, 8 August 2011 (PDT)
: User was banned for this post. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 10:28, 8 August 2011 (PDT)

Congratulations. You're one of many people being made fun of on /cwc/ at this precise moment. --[[User:Old meme|Old meme]] 09:37, 8 August 2011 (PDT)

==Thorg = Thorgnzorrg==
I'm pretty sure that ''Thorg'' is actually [[User:Thorgnzorrg]]. Can we mention it, for the sake of being good, clear and trustworthy source of informations of Chris' lifetime? [[User:Hasharin|Hasharin]] 13:31, 8 August 2011 (PDT)

*Nah don't bother linking that, just make me a small page or something. --[[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]

== Calling Out Alex ==

Uh, I know this is silly to ask, but should we leave that he's used [censored] for this?--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 16:12, 9 August 2011 (PDT)
:* You need to read Anonymax's 16:34, 6 August 2011 reply to the thread at the top of the page. Basically, don't go posting shit about alleged identities of trolls. As for the link to the pic, Imma cuttin it down. --[[User:BrianBash|BrianBash]] 16:28, 9 August 2011 (PDT)
Amazingly, he seems to be correct about the owner of the Game Place. I was expecting that Chris was likely to have fucked up and mixed him up with someone of a similar name and more or less committed slander in front of the world, but: http://sex-offender.vsp.virginia.gov/sor/offenderDetails.html?regId=13957 and here's the information for the Game Place LLC in Virginia:

[[file:Gameplacellc.PNG]]

Unless there's another Robert C Lightburn in the area, Chris was right. Except that the guy was busted for porn possession, not molesting anyone.[[User:Robobobo|Robobobo]] 21:04, 9 August 2011 (PDT)

== SurfShackTito (Don) Response? ==

There supposedly a response (well...a few actually) from Tito. The one I'm actually interested in (because the others really suck and pretty much scream fake) can be found here [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZhlo94cMNk&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL]. Do we have any way to confirm or deny ANY of these supposed responses? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 21:29, 9 August 2011 (PDT)
* That one's on the CWCVille Library. I'd be 99.99% sure that it's official.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 21:30, 9 August 2011 (PDT)

On the subject of the response video, should it be placed on this page? Certainly it seems like that would be beneficial in making the events covered by the article easier to follow for future readers. On the other hand, I feel a little apprehensive about putting a non-Chris video in the middle of this article. Perhaps the video could have its own separate page? Granted, I feel even more apprehension towards that idea, as I don't think we should get into the habit of making pages for videos other than Chris's. Of course, it's already posted on [[Surfshack Tito (troll)]], but if events led him to make several more videos then that page will quickly turn into a mess. Plus, in the future it might be difficult for readers to discern were in the timeline Tito's response video fits. --[[User:ThatMan|ThatMan]] 20:41, 10 August 2011 (PDT)

== Thunderf00t ==

The photograph of Thorg is quite recognisable as being half of the face of [http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20101208080439/youtube/images/3/3e/Thunderf00t.JPG Thunderf00t], a prominent figure on youtube who gained fame for his radical defense of-wait for it- atheism; making whole video series debunking creationist claims and even debating Richard Dawkins. Moreover, Thunderf00t DOES have a lot of acne scars. I don't know how it could have happened, but it seems clear to me that Chris has managed to confuse Thorg with a minor internet celebrity. [[User:Qeex|Qeex]]

== Bob Not Mentioned Specifically--Significant? ==

Chris doesn't really reference his father in any of these videos; despite having mentioned the family several times. When previous talking about his family, Chris almost always referred to Barb and Bob individually as "my mother and my father" (or some facsimile thereof). Could this possibly indicate Bob's demise? And in any case, would this note be worth adding anywhere? --[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 11:20, 11 August 2011 (PDT)

== Piping ==

Seriously? Does there need to be that many fucking links to retarded shit in the transcripts?? You people act like just because Chris finally made a new video you have to pipe EVERY SINGLE word that can be relayed to a different page.. Its fucking ridiculous... [[User:Smtp|Smtp]] 12:18, 11 August 2011 (PDT)

Pokémon

2011-01-11T01:37:57Z

Smtp: /* Scyther */

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[Image:Satoshi tajiri.jpg|thumb|[[Aspergers|Aspie]] creator of the series, Satoshi Tajiri. Unlike Chris, he actually did something with his life.]]

'''''Pokémon''''' (or Pok'emon, according to Chris) is one of [[Nintendo]]'s greatest creations, a Japanese cultural phenomenon that is beloved by children around the world, and a billion dollar multimedia franchise encompassing [[video games]], [[card games]], toys, an [[anime]] series, and much, much more.

Yet it only took [[Christian Weston Chandler|one autistic manchild]] to forever ruin it for an entire generation.

==Chris-chan in the Pokémon world==
Chris, according to the "[[Sonichu]]" article on the [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu CWCipedia], sees himself as an official Pokémon gym leader. He claims to have over 387 Pokémon leveled-up to level 100 on his ''Pokémon Diamond'' game, all of them being trained without any kind of cheating or Rare Candies. It's not certain whether this is truth or more of his [[autistic]] imagination. However, given the fact he owns [[List of Chris's games|every Pokémon game]] and game system, has no life at all, and has paid off several mortgages in [[Animal Crossing]], it may very well be true. Who knows? All it takes is a load of time, and Lord knows Chris's [[Mass debating|time isn't going to anything good]].

It should be noted that the Generation V games ''Black'' and ''White'' feature 649 Pokémon, something that should be common knowledge to anyone claiming to have achieved what Chris has, making his "collection" far from complete.

As the leader of the [[CWCville]] Pokémon Gym, Chris has a fairly unimaginative team:
:* [[Sonichu]], a [[Parody|Recolor]]
:* [[Anime|Inuyasha]], a [[Wikipedia:Blaziken|Blaziken]]
:* [[Gregg Mays|Greg]], a [[Wikipedia:Swampert|Swampert]]
:* [[Chris and his Ego|Christina]], a [[Wikipedia:Sceptile|Sceptile]]
:* [[Vanessa Hudgens|Vanessa]], a [[Wikipedia:Gardevoir|Gardevoir]] (who many people seem to have a fetish for, [[Chris and sex|possibly including Chris]]...)
:* [[Random-access humor|Bagoner]], a [[Wikipedia:Salamence|Salamence]]

==Pokémon characters appearing in ''Sonichu'' comics==

===[[Wikipedia:Pikachu|Pikachu]]===

Transformed into [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]. Despite the importance to ''Sonichu'' lore, this is basically the only time a Pikachu appears or is mentioned in the comic. From this point on, it's all just shitty recolors of Chris's first shitty recolor.

===[[Wikipedia:Raichu|Raichu]]===

Transformed into [[Rosechu]] by the [[Rainbow]], in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]].

===[[Wikipedia:Dragonite|David the Dragonite/Daisy the Dragonite]]===

A Dragonite Kel also owned. The considerate Pokémon trainer offered his [[Duck|sexual services]] to [[Rosechu]] when the latter was [[Masturbating and squirtin'|in heat]], noting that he's "[[Honest|loyal]]". Rosechu refused, stating that David is "[[Obesity|just too big]]" even for her loose, gaping [[China]], and suggesting Kel [[Patti-Chan|have sex with him herself]]. Kel enigmatically answers that "she can't say she didn't try". Did they or didn't they? History will [[Chris and writing#Kudzu plot|never know]].

Strangely enough, David may have been [[retcon]]ned into "Daisy the Dragonite", as indicated by a listing of Kel's Pokémon on [[CWCipedia]]. David, who appeared in [[Issue 0]] (Episodes 2 and 3), is not mentioned on the list, though Daisy is and is the only Dragonite on the list. It would not be out of the question to think that Chris simply forgot about David's importance to the canon and retconned him into a girl, especially probable due to the fact that both names begin with the same letter and Chris couldn't really name a girl "Davidina", plus the fact that he has created [[Simonla|gender-benders]] before. This would indicate that Kel, in fact, offered "Daisy" to Rosechu for a [[lesbian]] relationship, which in turn calls into question the sexuality of Rosechu, Kel, and the Dragonite, and makes several aspects of the comic a great deal more confusing.

===[[Wikipedia:Zapdos|Zapdos]]===
[[Image:Zapdos.jpg|thumb|Zapdos is not amused with Chris's faggotry.]]
An electric type [[Pokémon]] and one of the three legendary birds. Zapdos was used by [[Naitsirhc]] to capture [[Rosechu]] and battle [[Sonichu]] in CWCville Mall. Although Sonichu was victorious, Naitsirhc obtained a sample of Sonichu's [[Semen|DNA]], which he would later use in the creation of [[Black Sonichu]].

===[[Wikipedia:Raikou|Raikou]]===

Used by Naitsirhc as a getaway ride in the same episode.

===[[Wikipedia:Scyther|Scyther]]===
[[File:Scyther.jpg|thumb|200px|right|The Scyther who fathered Wild Sonichu. [[Chris and art|We think]].]]
For no obvious reason, a male Scyther assumed the role of [[Wild Sonichu]]'s father. Whether this is because it was screwing his Venusaur mother, or felt some obligation to help her raise Wild is unclear. The Scyther trained Wild in using his "Razor Leaf" attacks to cut down trees and such. It should be noted that Scyther cannot actually learn the move Razor Leaf in the video games.

In [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], Wild would tell Sonichu and Rosechu of the last time he saw his adoptive father. According to Wild, his father was the leader of the "cut-sharp" clan of "Scyther and Scizor". At some point, the "Charmeleon Cult" burned down the dojo in the jungle that served as their headquarters. Wild joined his father on a mission to take [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|revenge]], but the Scyther was intercepted and captured by poachers instead. Wild cried like a bitch while the poachers loaded his dad in their van, then finally attempted to use his super powers to free him. The Scyther told him to stop, however, since he knew Wild was too much of a [[fail|failure]] to cut through the steel frame of the van. Wild's last memory of his father was of "the passing-of-the-torch look in his eyes".

===[[Wikipedia:Venusaur|Venusaur]]===
[[File:Venusaur.jpg|thumb|200px|left|She has to put up with his retardation.]]
A female Venusaur in the jungle discovered [[Wild Sonichu]]'s egg and adopted him. As Wild inexplicably has retractable tentacles in his arms, the Venusaur trained him in using them to grasp objects. On the other hand, she may have rightly tried to drop a coconut on his head.

===[[Wikipedia:Swampert|Swampert]]===

A female Swampert adopted [[Bubbles Rosechu]] upon discovering her egg on the beach. Unlike Wild's parents, the Swampert doesn't seem to have taught Bubbles much of anything, and the pair spent her childhood splashing in the water like idiots. This idyllic existence was brought to an end when a Wailord dropped a giant boulder on the Swampert for no apparent reason. Unable to rescue her mother in her immature Rosey body, Bubbles evolved into her Rosechu form, and somehow used an ice beam to save the Swampert from drowning.

While Bubbles continues to live on the beach, the Swampert has not been seen since her first appearance. This would suggest that at some point, the Wailord returned to finish the job.

=== [[Wikipedia:Wailord|Boulder-Dropping Whale]] ===
[[Image:Boulder_Whale.jpg|160px|thumb|left|The Boulder Dropping Whale's lone appearance in the comic.]]
As the name suggests, Boulder-Dropping Whale is a creature resembling a whale, who literally dropped a boulder. This signature attack was used against the Swampert who raised [[Bubbles Rosechu]], and would have drowned the Swampert if not for Bubbles's timely intervention. Although never named in the comic, the whale's anonymity and murderous hatred for ''Sonichu'' characters has earned him a cult following among [[trolls|fans]], who have dubbed him "Boulder-Dropping Whale", or "BDW" for short.

Originally identified as a common whale in the [[Audiobooks]], Chris stated in [[CWC Blog#12 January 2010|a blog in January 2010]] that it is a Wailord, a [[Pokémon]] that closely resembles a whale. This makes sense, as Chris always uses Pokémon when drawing background fauna in his comics (probably because he didn't pay attention during any of his biology classes in high school), such as the underwater scene in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] which featured only Pokémon sea creatures, and no naturally occurring wildlife. Further, BDW's trademark attack appears to resemble "Rock Tomb", an attack available to many Pokémon in the video games, including Wailord.

Nevertheless, the name "Boulder-Dropping Whale" has stuck, and no matter what his species, he remains a [[troll|fan]] favorite.

Chris also stated in the same blog that Boulder-Dropping Whale had been captured, and was currently being forced to fight the senseless battles of some random Pokémon trainer. The fans have disregarded this statement, standing firm in their belief that Boulder Dropping Whale currently resides on the moon with his Moon-Pals '''Bill''', '''Metal Sonichu''', and '''[[Yawning Squirtle]]''', getting high as fuck.

=== [[Wikipedia:Mewtwo|Mewtwo]]===
[[Image:Mewtwo.JPG|thumb|right|Mewtwo is not pleased with Chris.]]
A powerful, reclusive Pokémon genetically engineered from the DNA of the rare Mew, Mewtwo escaped from his creators and briefly plotted to conquer the world in the first Pokémon feature film. Mewtwo's dark, brooding nature and vast psychic abilities would serve as Chris's "inspiration" for [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]], whose egg hatched in the same cave Mewtwo lived in during the movie. As if the connection weren't blatant enough, Chris established that Mewtwo served as Magi-Chan's mentor, contacting him at birth via telepathy and teaching him to use his mental powers. Aside from his mental rapport with Mewtwo, Magi-Chan grew up completely isolated from the rest of the world. In a half-assed attempt to introduce him to civilization, Mewtwo projected memories of Jackie Chan films, other people's birthday parties, and various tourist attractions. Two weeks after Magi-Chan evolved into his Sonichu form, Mewtwo sent him out into the world, promising that they would one day meet face-to-face. As Chris has probably forgotten all about this, though, it'll probably never happen.

Christian has also notably claimed on the [[CWCipedia]] once that Reldnahc had a Mewtwo in his Pokemon team. It can be assumed that this is the same one.
{{clear}}

=== [[Wikipedia:Snorlax|Snorlax]]===
[[File:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|A wild [[Barb|Snorlax]] in repose]]
A Snorlax briefly appeared in Christian's 'Backyard Safari' [[Sub-Episode]], a documentary about [[Jerkops]] designed specifically to insult them. He comments at one point that a [[Jerkhief]] weighs [[Obesity|over 1500 pounds]] and can be identified by its [[The Creepy Stare|glassy eyes]] and wooden badge. [[Chris and hypocrisy|How ironic for Chris to be saying such things about Jerkops]].

The Snorlax appears at the bottom of the page as an illustration, since Christian had commented in a paragraph that the Jerkhief was heavier than a Snorlax.

===[[Wikipedia:Jigglypuff|Jigglypuff]]===
Served as inspiration for [[Jiggliami]], an "original" character created by [[Blanca]]. Appeared in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] and [[Sonichu 8|#8]].

===[[Yawning Squirtle|Squirtle]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Mudkip|Mudkip]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Seadra|Seadra]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Goldeen|Goldeen]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Staryu|Staryu]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Corsola|Corsola]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Octillery|Octillery]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Mantine|Mantine]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Corphish|Corphish]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Flaaffy|Flaaffy]]===
Appears as [[Layla Flaaffy]] in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]].

===[[Wikipedia:Sneasel|Sneasel]]===
Appears as [[Reginald Sneasel]] in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]].

===[[Wikipedia:Nidoking|Nidoking]]===
Used by Naitsirhc to battle [[Bionic]] in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]].

===[[Wikipedia:Voltorb|Voltorb]]===
Used by Alec Benson Leary to murder [[Simonla Rosechu]] via Explosion in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

==Plagiarism in ''Sonichu''==

Despite the fact that Chris primarily uses Pokémon in his series, not only is he not above using the characters, he's also not above using various ''ideas'' from the series. Amongst those include:

*In [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]], [[Flame the Sunbird]] says that he "could use some pants". This is ripped off from ''[[Wikipedia:Pokémon: The Movie 2000|Pokémon: The Movie 2000]]'' when the Pokémon Slowking, freezing due to the weather changes, wishes for a pair to keep himself warm.
*Despite "not being a Pokémon," Flame uses Pokémon attacks in his one notable appearance. Speculation abounds, but it could be that Chris assumes that "Pokémon rules" apply to all intelligent mystical animals the way anyone with a guitar can pull off solo specials from [[Brutal Legend]].
*In [[Sonichu Special 4]], [[Kacey]]'s sister resembles Candice, one of the 4th Generation Gym Leaders.
*In the biography for [[Rosechu]], it is mentioned that [[Kel]] ended up getting the Pichu who'd become Rosechu because she missed out on getting Bulbasaur, Charmander and Squirtle. This is a ripoff of how Ash Ketchum got Pikachu, except for the fact that Ash and Pikachu didn't hit it off until Pikachu saw how far Ash would go to protect it.
*In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], Sonichu inexplicably knows Iron Tail, a Steel-type attack, for use on the Rock/Ground Type Liquid (Steel is super-effective against Rock). This is stolen, again, from Pikachu, who learned the same move so the writers could let Ash battle Roxanne(and other Rock types) without breaking the rules of the game and pissing off fans. The difference is that leading up to the battle, an episode was spent to show Pikachu learning the move. It is to be noted that in the video games, Pikachu is able to learn this move through the use of an item.

==Plagiarism ''of'' Sonichu?==
{{main|List of cards from The Wall of Originals}}

[[Image:CWCpokeymanz.png|thumb]]

Despite Chris's complete lack of originality when it comes to the [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]] [[Rosechu (species)|characters]], there are several Pokémon on the [[Wall of Originals]] that closely resemble actual Pokémon introduced in ''Ruby'', ''Sapphire'', ''Diamond'', and ''Pearl'' versions. What makes this interesting is that these cards were created in the early 2000's, predating the Japanese release of ''Ruby'' and ''Sapphire'' by at least one year, and ''Diamond'' and ''Pearl'' by at least five years. However, much like Chris's "idea" of putting [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|Sonic games on Nintendo consoles]], it is much more likely that the Pokémon's resemblances to Chris's abominations are a coincidence. At least, we can only hope so...

==See also==
*[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]
*[[Card_games#Pok.C3.A9mon_TCG|Pokémon TCG]]
*[[CWC's Pokésite 2]]
*[[Pokéwalker of Fail]]

[[Category: Things Chris has ripped off]]
[[Category:Television shows]]
[[Category:Video Games]]

100 2278

2011-01-11T01:28:34Z

Smtp: Undo revision 131706 by TheDazro (talk) ....really?

[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris struggles even to hold on to the bar.]]

'''100 2278''' is a video [[Chris]] created on 12 [[October 2010]], at the behest of his sweetheart [[Jackie]]. (For background, see [[Jackie Chat 7]] and [[Jackie E-mails 18]].) It leaked to the public the next month, on 6 [[November 2010]]. Chris attempts to do pull-ups, but shortly after beginning, gives up and admits defeat due to his [[obesity|weight]]. This event marks a historic day in CWC history as it is the first time we have witnessed Chris acknowledge that he is not, in fact, superhuman.

__TOC__
{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100_2278
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XWTsHUjAwl8}}
| stardate = 6 [[November 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = {{RedYellowStripeShirt|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[ToJackie]]
| next = [[100 2357.MOV]]
}}

===Transcript===
[''We see Chris's hands and knees on top of a jungle gym. He crawls backwards to grab hold of a horizontal bar.'']

[''Chris hangs from the bar, not far off the ground, for a few seconds. Quickly, the exertion causes him to lose his grip and drop to the ground.'']

[''Chris grunts and jumps up to grab the bar again.'']

Ugh...

[''He quickly falls back down, and then looks to the camera.'']

Alright, fine, I can't do a pull up. At least I tried.

[''Chris springs up and tries to grab the bar again.'']

Still tryin'.

[''Chris makes grunting and gasping sounds.'']

Well, can't do it.

[''Chris tries to do a pull-up again with visibly shaking arms, grunts and sighs.'']

Uh... Too sensitive to my... [''sound of slapping belly''] weight.

[''Chris walks off camera.'']

==Images==
Accompanying the leaked video were a selection of images, presumed to be ones Chris took for [[Jackie]].

<center><gallery>
File:100_2242.JPG|The corner of Chris's room, with famous artifacts such as [[The Wall of Originals]], the [[Sailor Moon]] poster of Straightening, the [[Gitar of Fail]], and the [[fanbase|fan]] favorite, the [[The Simpsons#Marge poster|Marge poster]].
File:100_2243.JPG|The other corner has bunch of consoles. Clearly arranged in order of importance, otherwise he wouldn't put the [[wikipedia:Commodore 1541|Commodore 1541]] disk drive on open and hide the [[Nintendo|Wii]] among the junk.
File:100_2244.JPG|The [[McIntire Park]] sign.
File:100_2245.JPG|The table with Lego's, also carrying ''Transformers'' and ''Sonic'' toys. Also a boatload of video tapes, CD's, magazines, yet another Gitar, and ironically a box or book cover whose only visible words are "the hidden".
File:100_2246.JPG|A view of the window and the chair, with too much junk to count.
File:100_2247.JPG|DVD shelves, a bunch of folders undoubtedly containing much the original hand-artery drawings of ''Sonichu'' comics, [[My Little Pony|My Little Ponies]], and in case you forgot this was Chris's room, two more Gitars of Fail.
File:100_2248.JPG|Game shelf meets the DVD shelf.
File:100_2249.JPG|The doorway that leads to sweet freedom ([[Tour of Chris's House|which is a lie]]). Giant game shelves. and the mysterious blinking light ball featured in many videos.
File:100_2250.JPG|A bit of the Sulking Couch beside the door and PSP/DS game shelf. Letter box labeled "current and important". Two posters for mass debation, and a badass chain or something.
File:100_2251.JPG|More video tapes and toys beside the Sulking Couch. Noticeable failure at photographing the ''Sonic'' trinket.
File:100_2252.JPG|Back to the first corner with the Wall of Originals and Marge poster.
File:100_2253.JPG|Female martial artists are awesome! ...Except that's not a martial arts move. And that's not a female either. We've been duped!
File:100_2296.JPG|Now with extra [[Plush Breasts of Fail|boobage]].
File:100_2299.JPG|'''TITTY MONSTER'''
File:BeatSketcher20101012.png|Has Chris been improving his art during the dry spell? '''[[Chris and art|SPOILER: NO]]'''
File:ccsonichu.jpg|Chris's [[Chris-chan Sonichu|fursona]], from ''[[ECV 00002]]''.
</gallery></center>

==Fan videos==
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Private Chris Chan, U.S.M.C. Maggot
| video = {{#ev:youtube|F39Q8GS0z8M}}
| Stardate = 7 November 2010
| Maker = MiHiVidz
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chan's Dream
| video = {{#ev:youtube|rwGzjMECCAw}}
| Stardate = 8 November 2010
| Maker = raoulduke138
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}

== External links ==
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?8ca48v808ae5m0p Download Archive]
* [http://goo.gl/AeGkP Mirror]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ToJackie]]|nextlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]}}

{{LeakedVideos}}
{{Power videos}}
[[Category:Outdoor videos]]

[[Category: Jacklyn's Naughty No Trick, All Treat, 31 Days of Halloween Contest| 2010-10-12]]
[[Category: Chris-chan videos, November 2010| 2010-11-06]]
[[Category: Jackie Saga videos| 2010-11-06]]

Clyde Cash

2011-01-11T01:27:51Z

Smtp: Undo revision 131707 by TheDazro (talk)

[[Image:TheRealClydeCash.jpg|thumb|left|The real Clyde Cash, [[Secret Weapon|according to Chris]].]]
[[Image:ChrisVSClyde.JPG|thumb|Artist's interpretation of this epic struggle.]]
[[Image:325504 - Chris-chan clyde cash.jpg|thumb|[[Homos|STRAIGHT]] ANGER]]

{{quote|Yer butt's gonna be in trouble|[[Barbara Chandler]] on Clyde Cash<ref>[[Hooker incident#Aftermath|The Hooker Incident]]</ref>}}
{{quote|I'LL STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH!|[[Chris]] on Clyde Cash<ref>[[CWC Update!!!!! 27 March 2009]]</ref>}}

'''Clyde Cash''' (alias '''Gregg Mays''' - that's [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|Gregg with three G's]]) ([[America|4 July]] [[1976]]<ref>[[:File:ClydesDriverlicense.jpg]]</ref>) is leader of [[The Miscreants]] and the most notorious of [[Chris]]'s [[troll]]s.

In Chris's revised [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page, Clyde is referred to as a "Starscream troll". This is a reference to the ''[[Transformers]]'' character [[Wikipedia:Starscream|Starscream]], who would often switch sides or plot to overthrow [[Wikipedia:Megatron|Megatron]] behind the scenes. Chris says this [[Chris and Reality|because he believes]] Clyde allegedly killed [[BlueSpike]].<ref>[[Mumble 12]]</ref>

==Origins==
For the longest time, Clyde had no problems with Chris. Although he disapproved of some of the content, he was pleased to see the joy the franchise had brought his brother Ryan. Every night before bed, Clyde would read Ryan the latest ''[[Sonichu]]'' adventure until Ryan had dozed off to sleep (usually with the first three pages).

This changed when Chris announced, in his usual knee-jerk fashion, that he was going to stop drawing ''Sonichu'' [[comic]]s. Clyde tried comforting the upset Ryan to no avail. One night in mid-[[December 2008]],<ref>[[IRC (18 December 2008)]]</ref> Clyde entered Ryan's bedroom, intending to share a tray of freshly baked gingerbread men, only to find the lifeless form of his brother swinging from a light fixture. The dark silhouette of his body threw ghostly shadows across the room.

On the desk Clyde found a note - apparently the pain of not knowing whether [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]] would be released from the [[Dark Mirror Hole]] was too much for the young Ryan to bear. Clyde screamed, but no sounds would come out. Collapsing to the floor, he swore undying revenge on Christian Weston Chandler.
{{clear}}

==The torment begins==
[[Image:ClydesDriverlicense.jpg|thumb|left|[[Virginia]]: [[Virginia is for Virgins|No longer for virgins]].]]
[[Image:Clydecashandannamclerran.jpg|thumb|Clyde Cash turns [[Anna McLerran|ladies]] [[Homos|straight]].]]
Clyde's first act was to rape Chris's [[sweetheart]] [[PandaHalo]]<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref>, but it did absolutely nothing to Chris as he simply moved onto the next [[gal-pal]].

Then, Clyde [[Gregg Mays E-mails|posed as Gregg Mays]] (a web designer working for [[Nintendo]]) to gain access to [[Sonichu.net]]. Holding the site for ransom, he told Chris to make [[It's UGH!|a video proclaiming he was gay]]. He then told him to make a [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|video declaring his straightness]]. Eventually, Chris regained access to the site. Striking again, Clyde worked with a [[troll]] and got rid of the domain. Chris, being resilient, bought Sonichu.info. With the help of PandaHalo, Clyde managed to gain access again.

It was around this time that [[Takashi Tezuka]] and [[Jay Z]] were doing their ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' game project. Clyde then decided to make things more interesting and posed as [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] to destroy any chance of the project. Teaming up with [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]], they created the [[Miyamoto Saga]].

[[Julie]] set up a [[Mumble]] chat in which Chris could communicate with [[Trolls|TRUE and HONEST ''Sonichu'' fans]]. Clyde stalked Julie while infiltrating these chats to confront Chris. He began throwing demands to Chris such as [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 10th, 2009|cleaning his room]]. Chris at the same time also bought SonichuandRosechu.com. Clyde got access yet again, this time with the help of Julie. In the end, it was revealed that Julie was a thirteen-year-old boy and that Clyde had staged the whole thing.<ref>[[Julie Reveals Herself]]</ref>

After that, he sent out his trusted [[Man in the Pickle Suit|Hebrew friend]] to scout out Chris's whereabouts. The MIPS turned [[Robert Simmons V]] into a troll and infiltrated [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]].<ref>[[Church Audio]]</ref> He then stole Chris's one and only date, [[Emily]].<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

When [[Ivy]] came along, he decided to continually harass her and despite Chris making a few threats, Ivy eventually gave in and killed herself.<ref>[[CWC "Boyfriend"]]</ref>

Oh, and Clyde also hacked into the [[PSN]] a few times, but then [[Jack Thaddeus]] did him one better...<ref>[[Chris humps his PS3]]</ref>

And to think all this was done due to Chris not caring about one fan's tragic suicide.

On 22 [[May 2009]], the death of Clyde Cash, by a shotgun wound to the head, was reported by [[The Miscreants]]. The incident was deemed suicide, although some suspected a foul play.

==In the comic==
[[File:Cly.jpg|thumb|left|"Cly" in [[Sonichu Special 1|''Sonichu Special'' #1]].]]
[[Image:ClydeJackGay.JPG|thumb|Artist's depiction of Clyde and Jack's final moments.]]

In the [[comic]], Cly(de) is a villain working for [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. Apart from capturing [[Ivy]] and getting into a fight with Chris, he initially only appeared on [[CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero]], officially [[Sonichu Special 1|''Sonichu Special'' #1]]. Not much is known about Clyde, other than he lives in a mansion and owns a pickle gun and "slander ray."

He made his first appearance in the comic proper [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] as the 4[[-cent_garbage.com]] building is collapsing. When [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] escapes, he condemns Clyde and [[Jack Thaddeus]] for being [[homo]] trolls. When [[Beel]] escapes, he too condemns the two for their actions, saying that being homo trolls that are "slandering and tarnishing a innocent man's good name" is just as evil as being an assistant for Adolf Hitler. With no option left, Clyde and Jack jump into the 66+6-story elevator shaft to their deaths.

== Currently ==
[[Image:GaySpiderMan.jpg|thumb|Clyde Cash and his buddy [[Jack Thaddeus|Jack]].]]
[[File:ClydeandLovelyweather.jpg|left|thumb|Clyde with [[The Wallflower]].]]
[[File:Chriscash.jpg|thumb|Chris's bizarre attempt to [[100 2267|impersonate Clyde]].]]
After Clyde faked his death for reasons unknown, he came back with a vengeance. Chris is not very pleased.

In late [[2009]], when not battling [[Liquid Chris]] for the hand of [[Kacey]], Chris spent his time trying to convince Clyde Cash, alias Gregg Mays (or "Gregg Mays, alias Clyde Cash," depending on which name he remembers first) to face him in one on one battle. Chris has recorded several feats of strength through a combination of Kacey trying to get him to get into [[obesity|shape]] and a desire to frighten Clyde with his [[Chris and Health|bulging muscles]].

Chris had also a picture to blackmail Clyde, but ultimately nothing came of it other than a series of videos where Chris tries to torture Clyde.<ref>[[ClydeGoingOnGregg1]], [[Clyde's Buddy Matt Getting SUPER-LAID!!!]], [[Clyde is Weaker than Water]], [[Getting Foam Ed]], [[Twin Falling Towers]], [[It will never end]], [[Apology for 9/11 Joke]]</ref> Clyde scoffed at [[No More Jokes|the final video]].

However, because of the negative reaction to [[Sonichu Special 4|''Sonichu Special'' #4]], Chris, in the [[CWCipedia]] mailbag, made clear that he would only sit and talk cooperatively with Clyde to get him to stop harassing him.{{cite}}

Eventually, Chris decided to revisit his old nemesis in [[2010]], believing he was the reason why he lost the heart of "[The Wallflower]]". In it, he is shown fighting Clyde, then pulling a [[knife]] and [[Don't Mess With Me|slitting Clyde's throat]] as a [[Death threats|warning]] to all [[trolls]].

In another well-thought counter-trolling plan, Christian unsuccessfully [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|attempted to scam Clyde]] into paying Chris $9,001 for destroying his own [[PS3]]. This almost fail-proof scheme was however foiled thanks to [[Surfshack Tito]]'s vigilance.

==Fan videos==
{{collapsible
|Clyde Cash Fan Videos
|
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-chan Loves Clyde Cash
| video = {{#ev:youtube|73jIxs5yQLg}}
| Stardate = 17 [[April 2009]]
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/CWCvillelulz CWCvillelulz]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info = It's a love/hate relationship.
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan KILLED Clyde Cash (Never-Before-Seen Footage)
| video = {{#ev:youtube|FiTVga0G8Ws}}
| Stardate = 7 [[June 2009]]
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/TheClydeCash TheClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Particle-chan
| video = {{#ev:youtube|NrhdImejktI}}
| Stardate = 1 [[July 2009]]
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/PodMonkeyCWC PodMonkeyCWC]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Shit Was So Cash!
| video = {{#ev:youtube|32XiZC2yG1Y}}
| Stardate = 25 [[April 2010]]
| Maker = Psycatalyst
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
}}
==See also==
{{Fan art}}
*[[A CWC Audition]]
*[[(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise]]
==Sauces==
<references />
==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/TheGreggMays Gregg's YouTube account]
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?jmmyzlznhfa Post-date Conversations] - The part with Clyde begins at about 4:35.
*[http://en.tackfilm.se/?id=1263141624839RA18 An International Tribute to Teh Graet Clyde Cash.]
{{Clyde Saga}}
{{Trolls}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Cash, Clyde}}
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

Christopher's name change

2011-01-09T19:57:59Z

Smtp: Undo revision 131664 by Seekndestroyy87 (talk) NO.

[[Image:Bearsteinofficial.jpg|thumb|300px|right|Godbear|I am Godbear Almighty; walk before me and be blameless. No longer will you be called Christopher; your name will be Christian, for I have made you a father of [[CWCville|many nations]].]]

At age ten, Christopher Weston Chandler '''changed his name''' to [[Christian Weston Chandler]] as a result of events in December [[1992]]. His name was legally changed the following year. Given the significance Chris ascribes to his identity and his name, it's no wonder that he continues to consider this to be one of the most significant events of his life.

==Leonard Bearstein==

Chris credits his name change to "Leonard Bearstein," an animatronic bear in a musical program presented at shopping malls and other venues. The Leonard Bearstein Symphony Orchestra ([[wikipedia:Leonard Bernstein|I see what you did there]]) is still in operation to this day, running shows in North Carolina, Virginia, and elsewhere during the Christmas season. The Leonard character is designed to be fully interactive and engage in conversations with the audience via a human operator behind the scenes.<ref>[http://www.leonardbearstein.com/ Leonard Bearstein's website]</ref><ref>[http://www.facebook.com/pages/Leonard-Bearstein/205357189065 Leonard Bearstein has a Facebook FFS]</ref> During a shopping trip to Richmond in 1992, the Chandler family encountered the Bearstein show at Regency Square Shopping Mall. Chris was evidently fascinated by the spectacle, and due to the light turnout that day, he received considerable attention from the interactive bear. The performer operating Leonard asked Chris his name, and misunderstood "Christopher" as "Christian." Chris and his family seem to attribute this error to the Leonard's English accent, rather than the fact Chris was talking to a man over a microphone built into a robot bear. For reasons understood only by him, Chris adopted the new name and insisted upon being called by it.<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992|Wikipedia autobiography]]</ref>

On 29 December 1993, the ''Richmond Times-Dispatch'' ran [[IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES|a fluff piece]] on the incident. The story drew a connection between Chris's experience with the bear and his successes in finding an autism-friendly school and winning the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]], and reported the family's decision to begin the legal process to rename him. It also quoted Chris's father [[Bob]] as admitting that he had wanted to name his son "Christian" to begin with, but had pussied out (although what he was afraid of remains unclear).<ref>[[IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES|Richmond Times-Dispatch article]]</ref><ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Christopher|Emily Date Conversation Transcript]], 52:22</ref>

==Significance today==
[[Image:Crystal.jpg|thumb|right|Who the hell is Christopher?]]
As even a cursory examination will reveal, Chris is fixated on his own name and events from his childhood. Thus an event which resulted in him having ''two'' names to obsess over is of supreme importance to him, even after almost twenty years. However, Chris routinely glosses over key details in the story--at times he will simply refer to "Christopher" or discuss being renamed by "a conducting Bear" as if no further context is required.<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]]</ref> For example, the [[troll|trolls']] first real insight into the event comes from this brief note in Chris's [[DVD]] slideshow:

{{quote|Before moving from Ruckersville to Richmond, in December of 1989, my family and I were watching the Regency Square Bear Band perform. When the Conductor asked me my name, I told him "Christopher", but apparently he was english, since he misunderstood me and called me "Christian". The name change settled in. Originally when I was born my father wanted to name me Christian, but he chickened out and named me Christopher.|Chris's note in his DVD Slideshow<ref>[[DVD Slideshow Transcripts]]</ref>}}

As seen here, even at age 25 Chris saw no need to explain why he would change his name at the behest of a total stranger, ursine or otherwise.

Chris's fixation on his identity came to the fore during the [[Liquid Saga]], when he was confronted with an impostor of himself. In his struggle to affirm his uniqueness in the universe, Chris reluctantly conceded that Liquid might truly share the name "Christian Weston Chandler," but clung to the idea that he and he alone was ''born'' Christopher Weston Chandler and later ''became'' Christian Weston Chandler. (This of course missed the point that Liquid was not merely taking credit for Chris's accomplishments but claiming to ''be'' Chris, name change and all.) This became a recurring theme in Chris's videos at the time, as he would repeatedly cite his name change as something that the impostor could not possibly claim as his own.

Since Liquid and others were constantly accusing Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named "[[Ian Brandon Anderson]]", Chris frequently asserted the authenticity of his name. However, the name change clouds the matter, and Chris could not even use a phrase like "my God-given name" without qualifiers:

{{quote|Call me by the real name that God and the bear has given me throughout my whole life.|Chris makes no sense, 06 August 2009<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref>}}

Along with Chris's tendency to refer to God and Jesus in the same breath (or even [[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions|the same word]]), this quote gave rise to the troll meme that Leonard Bernstein is an aspect of God, or rather '''Godbear'''.

==Christopher as a separate personality==

[[Image:Recent Activity.jpg|thumb|250px|"Christopher" in action]]

That Chris's preadolescence has a name unto itself seems to encourage Chris to treat "Christopher" as a former life. In his KCWC dedication series, Christian dedicated a song to Christopher and explained the distinction:

{{quote|Coming in at number five! It's a dedication to myself but also mainly to my pa-to my... to the one that was at my birth name: Christopher. Christopher Weston Chandler. Before the name change and all, he still lives in me in [[heterochromia|my one blue eye]]. And in my heart and soul. Cuz he is me, I am him.|Chris, 12 August 2009<ref>[[KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special#Part 4: #6 and #5]]</ref>}}

Shortly thereafter Chris briefly tried to imply that Christian and Christopher were [[30 August 2009|split personalities]], going as far as faving [[gay]] [[pedophile]] [[anime]] videos on [[YouTube]] in the name of "Christopher". However, he quickly abandoned the act, and later admitted that he made the whole thing up in a [[Mailbag 4#Dissociative identity|mailbag response]].

Despite Chris's assertion that Christopher lives on in him, it would appear Christopher's spirit haunts the grounds at [[14 Branchland Court]], judging by the account of ace field agent JenkinsJinkies:

{{squote|I went over to Chris's house with a flashlight that Night. I'm trekking through the daylilly garden aisles, searching for more bad I can do about the house. When suddenly, I hears a voice, "Hello". I look around and see nobody. I am Terrified. Then suddenly, I am fucking paralyzed; my ankles and wrists are pulled to my left and right, feeling like there were other people's hands holding them down on a floor, and I feel a pair of hands on my Neck too;
strangling me, yet I can still breathe. Then the voice comes back, "Hello, Mr. Troll." It is the voice of a child, about 8 years old. I struggle to look around, yet I see nobody. I'm fuckin' shittin' my pants here. The voice continues, "Do not be afraid of me, like the teachers of the Elementary School were; they did not understand me and my mind. I want you to understand my mind..." Right after, I see a lot of strange images going through my mind. Including the images of an abusive babysitter called "Roache" locking me alone in a static room; a therapy session at James Madison University; the teachers, guidance counsoler and principal of Nathanel Greene Elementary School holding me down and taping my screams and more. I tried to scream, but Nothing came out; it was a Scream of Silence; I could not even utter a WORD in Normal Voice; Only Silence. [...] I have encountered the Spirits of Young Christopher Weston Chandler and Patti, protecting the Chandler Household. I warn you all right here and now, Stay Away from his house, and Patti's Grave.|Jenkins reports on the Chandler household, 27 July 2010<ref>[http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1068&highlight=#1068]</ref>}}

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:432CWCSNHP8.jpg|From the [[scrapbook]]
Image:0060-CWCNote1.jpg|From the [[DVD]]
Image:BearsteinbyChris.jpg|Bearstein performance in the Regency Sq. Mall
Image:Godbear.jpg|A challenger appeared, beware Raptor Jesus
Image:Bearsteinofficial.jpg
Image:Leonard Bernstein.jpg|[[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|No relation]]
Image:Angrybear.png
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Ricardo Weston Chandler]]
*[[Carlos Chantor]]

==Sauces==
<references />

==External links==
*[http://www.leonardbearstein.com/ Leonard Bearstein's website]
*[http://pqasb.pqarchiver.com/timesdispatch/access/615847621.html?dids=615847621:615847621&FMT=ABS&FMTS=ABS:FT Richmond Times - Dispatch article, 29 December 1993]
*[http://www.regencysquaremall.com/ Regency Square Mall site]

[[Category:Events]]

Talk:11042009 51 50

2010-12-18T17:31:00Z

Smtp:

Transcribing! Also, can we please get a better name? Like "Chris Pumps Iorn" or "Chris does reps" or something?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:22, 5 November 2009 (CET)
*...Elbow-greased strength? -- [[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 06:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)
**Oooh! That one's good! I'm changing my vote to that.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:49, 5 November 2009 (CET)
**That's good. I also suggest "The Big Five-Oh." [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 06:53, 5 November 2009 (CET)
***I called it "51 50" on the [[List of videos]]. I think that's what CWC intended to call it. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 21:24, 5 November 2009 (CET)

Sure, if you want to. I only made the page, a more flavorful name would help I reckon--[[User:El Presidente|El Presidente]] 06:31, 5 November 2009 (CET)

The original link to the weight of a can of soda was based on an 12 pack of 8-ounce cans, but those are 12-ounce cans that he has (in his soda cartons that is; his man-cans are much heavier). So I changed the link. [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 06:38, 5 November 2009 (CET)
:Those boxes really don't look full. [[User:JohnnyA|JohnnyA]] 07:58, 5 November 2009 (CET)

If he's claiming it's 4.26 litres tall, and all the cans are full then the box could not have weighed anymore than 4.26kg--[[User:El Presidente|El Presidente]] 06:41, 5 November 2009 (CET)

*4.26 litres would refer to the volume of the liquid itself. The aluminum cans and the carton would add a touch more weight than just that of the liquid. [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 08:12, 5 November 2009 (CET)
**Converted exactly, the 12pack weighs about 8.9lbs. The article says 10 at the moment. I can't be the only one that is uneasy giving CWC those extra 2lbs. --[[User:Blueatom|Blueatom]] 15:00, 5 November 2009 (CET)

In all fairness to that damned impostor Ian Brandon Anderson, simply giving the mass of those packs of cans won't do justice to the amount of effort he puts out in lifting those boxes. Let's say that each of those packs has a mass of 3 kg. Compared to lifting two 3kg dumbbells, a lot more effort needs to be made for lifting those boxes, because the mass is distributed a fair distance away from where he's gripping them. Just as trying to a 10kg weight over your head when it's on the other end of a 20m pole would be tougher than just picking the damn thing up and lifting it over your head, there's an added difficulty with lifting these boxes vs. a normal weight. That's not to say that IBA's feat is of Olympian strength (or even respectable strength), but it is to say that trying to figure out the weight of the boxes doesn't really prove all that much. And... as for the transcript, are you sure he says that they weigh 50 pounds? It kind of sounds like "15 pounds", which would be a lot more accurate. Anyway... Chris fails, regardless. I also propose that we name this video "Chris Pumps Aluminum and Cardboard". Though "The Big Five-Oh" is pretty appealing, too.... I'm done rambling. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 07:10, 5 November 2009 (CET)
* No, he's definitely saying "50 pounds." Actually, he's saying "fitty pounds." [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 07:17, 5 November 2009 (CET)
** He's saying 50. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 07:18, 5 November 2009 (CET)
***I just listened to it again. Sounds like 50 to me. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 07:23, 5 November 2009 (CET)
****I seem to stand corrected. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 19:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)

Alright, so who else is willing to bet at the end when he says "I'm str..." and cuts off that instead of saying strong he intended to bring his sexuality back in for no good reason? [[User:Artiph|Artiph]] 23:59, 5 November 2009 (CET)

== [[Chris and strength]] (or sth like that) requested ==

Or just a major update to [[Chris and health]]. (Edit: OK, there's a section for this there already.) --[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 08:55, 5 November 2009 (CET)

:Is anyone else curious as to what brought on this whole "I'm strooooooooooooooong" phase of his recently? I mean he's always been a violent freak, but he's specifically making the point ""I'm strooooooooooooooong" a lot more lately. Does anyone know if there's any reasoning behind why he's feeling the sudden urge to prove his physical prowess (or lack thereof) so bluntly?--[[User:Curshot|Curshot]] 17:29, 5 November 2009 (CET)

::Chris knows he at least has more mass than Liquid or Gregg, and by his logic, that means he's tougher than them. So now he's trying to lord over them one of the area's he's certain he's superior in.
::He keeps challenging them to "Fight him in person" so maybe he really hopes that they'll come to his house one of his days so he can beat them up. Alternately, I guess he could be aware of the fact that he'd get has ass handed to him, and is doing this whole "I'M STRONNNNNNNG" thing as a way of trying to intimidate them into never showing up, so he can sit at home and be all smug at the fact that trolls are terrified of him.
::Either way, he's failing hardcore. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 18:34, 5 November 2009 (CET)
::I think the whole "Strongman show" started with the [[Sign Destruction Video]]. Chris looked weak on it and Clyde laughed at him in a video response. This brought us to the hilarious [[Chris Loses It]] video. In Clyde response, he said that he would be scared when Chris will become more powerful. Our favorite man-child took him to word and the Kacey saga pushed him in this strongman trip even deeper. In any cases, this is excellent trolling from anyone involved. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 19:56, 5 November 2009 (CET)

:Don't forget that he needs to impress Kacey with his manliness. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 19:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)

== What is Parappa saying on his shirt? ==

--[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 15:16, 5 November 2009 (CET)
*According to my research, (And by research, I mean looking at a shirt just like his,[http://kotaku.com/274863/parappa-the-t+shirt link]), He's saying "I gotta believe!".--[[User:SP-441|SP-441]] 16:28, 5 November 2009 (CET)

==Even less?==

According to the link, diet soda weighs less than regular because real sugar weighs more. And because it's lemonade and isn't dealing with carbonation, it could also be fluctuating to be something different. Could we be going into the 9 lb. range?

But then, maybe I'm thinking too far into what might be an ounce of difference. --[[User:LizardPie|LizardPie]] 21:52, 6 November 2009 (CET)

==Crusher==

Chris' fervent can-lifting reminded me of [http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=50723 Todd Wentworth]! [[User:Klingerbgoode|Klingerbgoode]] 12:09, 9 November 2009 (CET)

== Weight ==

Didn't Chris say somewhere (in a mailbag or something) that he was only like 150lbs?

While I scoffed, and its still likely untrue, there may be a hidden gem in all this.

If I recall, muscle weighs 3 or 4x as much as fat, and much more dense. Chris's muscles by contrast, seem to have withered away to nearly nothing, seeing as how he can't break sticks or stuff like that, and as pointed out in the article, that no one can really see if his muscles are doing any work. Even his reactions are all clumsy now (witness the video where he tries to unleash his knife for example). So theoretically, he really COULD be 150lbs...150lbs of pure blubber and blubber laden organs. People can be 250-300 lbs, and its all muscle or fat with solid muscle underneath. --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 19:11, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

*Chris just uploaded a video that showed he was about 216 pounds. Have fun with that. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 20:13, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

**Main weight discussion/page formulation seems to have moved to the [[Talk:WeighIn|WeighIn Talk Page]] --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 04:07, 29 October 2010 (PDT)

Jackie E-mails 23

2010-12-04T00:55:16Z

Smtp: email box fix

This page lists emails exchanged by Chris and [[Jackie]] from 22 to 26 [[November 2010]]. Chris has not responded to her emails since.

In response to his apathy, Jackie sends Chris a tirade of angry emails. She begins by focusing on Chris's personal faults before refocusing her anger on Rocky.

Chris retaliates with claims that his duck is no longer bent and got bigger, and that he's no longer fat. He also claims to feel like a woman.

In response, Jackie details the reasons why he is so widely disliked and sardonically wishes Chris a happy Thanksgiving.

Chris ignores Jackie's words of wisdom on the grounds that she hurt his feelings and accuses the world of being "[[autistic]]-like" and "unsympathetic", which Jackie again points out is just his way of preserving his ego and ensuring he never has to change.

{{Email|November 22, 2010 - 5:13pm

Hey Chris, I haven't heard back from you recently. I thought maybe you were confused about something I said. Let me reiterate some of my points for you so that you can better understand (reread this several times if you need to, I had a lot of ground to cover and it got pretty long by the time I was done writing it):

A self-respecting girl would not want a friends-with-benefits arrangement with a guy. No girl who knows her own value has any reason to want that sort of repugnant relationship. A self-respecting girl wants a real relationship with a guy. But that alone isn't what made your words to me insulting. What made what you said to me insulting was that we had spent months trying to build the basis of a relationship, but you just stomped all over it the whole time and acted like you didn't even want to be part of it. But you lied to me for months and told me you did want to be part of it. You eventually owned up and admitted your desire to be with me was a lie, but then you thought I would have some compelling reason to actually want to sleep with you after all that you had done to me. You basically told me "hey [[Jackie]], I don't really feel like putting out the effort to make you happy anymore, but I still want you to come give me free [[sex]]." Not a good way to make a girl feel special, Chris.

All that notwithstanding, I'm not holding a grudge against you. I want to be your friend, so I'm going to be helpful and lay out the facts for you so you know what you're working with. there are some girls who are perfectly willing to have a casual sex-based relationship with no strings attached. However, these girls always possess the same two qualities:

1) They usually have some kind of psychological hang-up, whether it be that they have terrible self-esteem and hate themselves, or they feel like no one could love them or that they don't deserve a real relationship, or something like that. Basically, every minute they are in this sort of hollow mockery of a relationship, they are in pain and suffering. But you probably wouldn't care about any of that, since all you want to do is fuck them and then ignore them.

2) The thing that I bet you WILL care about is that those women only care about the shallowest aspects of men. By that I mean that they want guys who are [[Liquid Chris|good-looking]], [[Clyde Cash|muscular]], [[Surfshack Tito|manly]], and have big [[pickle|dicks]]. You do not fit any of those criteria, Chris. You are significantly [[Obesity|overweight]] and flabby, you have virtually no muscle, your skin is pasty and your forehead is covered in acne scarring that is the most readily visible thing about you even in a low-light, low-resolution picture or video. Your [[hair]] is thinning and looks stringy and greasy all the time because you don't take care of it, your body isn't getting the nutrients it needs to maintain it, and you probably don't wash it all that much. [[ECV 00002|When you dressed up as]] [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], your distended gut was hanging so low it completely covered your belt buckle and much of the front of your pants, it reminded me of when [[Wikipedia:Peter Griffin|Peter Griffin]] is naked and they don't have to blur his genitals because his giant gut covers them completely. All of those are things that you could take care of if you actually tried, but you just stuff yourself with fast food, soft drinks, and [[:File:Kroger sighting.jpg|Hungry Man dinners]] all day and night and make no effort to exercise or keep in shape, which is why you can't do a single pull-up and your body is falling apart before you've even turned 30.

Also, your [[Duck|penis]] is rather small and bent at an awkward angle, girls who want an FWB arrangement just want the biggest, straightest dicks they can find. And trust me, they don't have trouble finding them. For every one of a guy like you, there are five or ten guys who actually take care of themselves physically that these girls can choose from instead. Oh, the other thing is that those girls will often forgive a less-than-attractive physique if the guy in question has a lot of money to spend on them. But having never tried to pursue an actual career (or earn [[money]] with your comics, which you have claimed many times you always wanted to do) means you have no money, either. So basically, you have nothing that an FWB-type of girl would want.

Now, if you want a girl who would look past all of the superficial stuff, you'd need to find a girl who wanted an honest relationship - a girl like me ;) Now, as I'm sure is obvious, I looked past your physical appearance, lack of money, and so on because I wanted to see what your personality is like. A lot of good girls will go for a guy who has a great personality, because that's probably the most important quality a person can possess. Now, consider that I gave you a lot of chances to show me what kind of personality you have.

In all our time communicating with each other, you showed that you are incredibly petty and vindictive. You showed that you care nothing for other peoples' property or livelihood, as evidenced by the ridiculous grudge you still possess against [[Michael Snyder]]. You went into [[The GAMe PLACe|the store]] he was in charge of running, you hogged his TV to play your own games, even though he never owed you that, and then when he tried to assert his dominance over the business HE runs, you scrawled vile graffiti slandering him in his own store, and you refuse to play by the rules and force him to ban you. And YEARS go by and you STILL hold this childish grudge to the point of repeatedly trespassing on the store's property and taking pictures of his children in a threatening manner. You are hateful and judgmental toward entire groups of people you know nothing about. You hate [[Homos|gays]] for absolutely no reason, you are afraid of [[Niggos|black people]], you think calling someone a "[[jew]]" is an insult, and yet you still get super self-righteous and act all offended whenever you think someone is disrespecting you because they don't like your autism. You are a hypocrite of immense proportions, always holding other people to standards of behavior that you believe you yourself have no obligation to follow. You criticize other people for social networking, saying "the internet is turning them autistic", even though you sit at home playing your [[Playstation 3]] ALL DAY LONG. [[CWC with Bible - Leviticus|You throw words from the Bible]] at people when they do something that offends you even though you [[lie]], cheat, steal, want premarital sex, [[Death threats|threaten bodily harm/murder]] on others, and a whole host of other activities that God doesn't like. And whenever you are cornered and can't explain away your rampant egotism and hypocrisy, you will just claim that "the trolls" are responsible for all your problems, great and small, and act as though your bad internet experience excuses you from having to take responsibility for anything.

And what's more, you expect others to do everything for you and offer nothing in return. You treat Samantha like she's your personal secretary and like she should do all the hard work to make your life better, and for a while now you've treated me the same way. Whenever either of us offer you an idea of how to deal with some problem of yours, you come up with some rationalization why you are too lazy to do it and beg us to do it for you instead. You'll complain about the same problems over and over but you refuse to consider any solution that is offered to you. You have talked down to me, insulted me, lied to me repeatedly (I know you have lied to Samantha countless times), refused to do something I asked you to do many, many times, yet you still expect me to be some perfect girlfriend who makes you happy all the time. You complained about our IM conversations being stressful and said they "could be construed as arguments", just because I had a different opinion than you on things and wanted you to back up your belief instead of just believing things for no reason. You place your prized video games above all other concerns in your life, you drop the majority of what little money you have every month on video games and then whine about how you don't have the money you would need to accomplish actual goals. You complain about other people being addicted You make excuses that "once we're together, then you will improve yourself", suggesting that you expect me to be a babysitter and give your life direction because you are too lazy to give it direction yourself. If you had been a good person, things might have turned out different between us. But you proved your inside was even uglier than your outside.

The most succinct way to put why you are not currently ready to be with a girl is that you want to be taken seriously as an adult man even though you are a person who sits in [[Chris's room|your room]] playing video games all day, [[Monthly tugboat|leeching money off the government]] that could be going to people who are homeless and starving and at the same time convincing yourself that God WANTS you to have free money, has no goals, no aspirations, and no direction, who avoids any and all work like the plague, whines about [[Bob|his father]] telling him to do chores to real adults who have to work 60 hours a week and take care of themselves, all the while growing fatter, balder, greasier, and closer to death off your diet of fast food and Hungry Mans and a total lack of exercise or activity. You need to change all of these things about yourself before a relationship (fwb or not) with any girl is practical.

Well, that was pretty long, I admit, but it's ground that needed to be covered. I feel kind of better now that we're just going to be friends instead of pursuing a relationship - I feel like I can be brutally honest about things that I always felt strongly about, but had to kind of sugercoat because our relationship was something different. Friends can sometimes be honest in ways that romantic partners have difficulty with. (You might be wondering, after I just got done explaining why you are such a bad friend, why I would want to be your friend - and that's a valid point. Well, I want to be your friend because I think it is possible for you to change, become good, and get the things you want, and it's not hurting me to help you to try.)

One more thing: I have to ask you, again, what Rocky has really done for you. Has Rocky helped you get a girlfriend and/or sex partner? No, you're still alone and a [[virgin]]. Has she helped you get healthy or develop a means of interacting with adults? No, you still live like a slob and play with toys all day. You are severely depressed because you don't have a social life, but she hasn't helped you with that. All she tells you is that nothing is your fault and that your problems will be solved when the trolls are all gone. Well, when the trolls are all punished, you'll still be a lonely, depressed virgin with no real social life, no job, no hobbies, and nothing significant in his life. Why don't you ask Rocky to help you with your actual personal problems, instead of just blaming the trolls for everything? I'M trying to help you by pointing out things you need to change about yourself. Doesn't Rocky? Or does she just tell you that it's okay to sit on your ass playing video games and doing nothing with your life? I've got news for you, if that's what she's telling you, it's because she believes you're too retarded and stupid to accomplish anything and she's just humoring you.

Anyway, I know this probably sounds all pretty brutal and shocking to you. That's why I want you to save this email and reread it, over and over. Read it again each day, so the shock can fade but my message can sink in. Because you really need this message to sink in, Chris. You need to do something different with your life. If you don't, then the life you have now is all you'll ever have.

Write me back,

Jackie}}

{{EmailReply|November 23, 2010 - 6:34pm

Well, I have not replied lately, because I have been emotionally
suffering and lost iin thoughts of my own with my own confusions and
lost paths.

Second, in response to your last message, when you described "such a
woman", you essentially spelled out how I've been eeling for a long
time. I have felt like I was one of them who have "some kind of
psychological hang-up, whether it be that they have terrible
self-esteem and hate themselves, or they feel like no one could love
them or that they don't deserve a real relationship, or something like
that. Basically, every minute they are in this sort of hollow mockery
of a relationship, they are in pain and suffering." Congratulations,
you put my situation in life in better words than I could have ever.

And I do not appreciate the hurtful insults I have read after hat
directed towards me. [[Duck|My dick]] is bigger than previously photographed,
and it is no longer bent. And I am not overweight. Two wrongs do not
make a right, so at this point, I'll leave you to think about how much
more hurt you've made me.}}

{{Email|November 23, 2010 - 7:33pm
Hi Chris.

I have been thinking about the stuff I said to you, and will continue to do so. But I do not feel guilty in the least about it. Everything I told you was the complete and utter [[lies|truth]]. And as I explicitly told you, I set out with only that purpose - to make you face the truth. I didn't set out to hurt you. I certainly did not set out to wrong you just because you wronged me out of believing that "two wrongs make a right". And what you call being "hurt", I call being knocked off your high horse and forced to accept some humility, which is something you desperately needed. You have believed for far too long that you deserve to have all your desires handed to you on a silver platter and that you shouldn't have to work to earn any of it. I set out to end that. So if you're expecting me to feel guilty or remorseful over trying to set you right, you're in for a yet another rude awakening, buddy-boy.

You would have a chance at a relationship if you just took care of yourself. You need to start eating healthy, take care of your appearance, build some muscle, and lose a lot of weight. You also need to stop treating girls like they are just living [[Kimmi|sex toys]] who exist to validate your manliness. You can't have a relationship the way you are now because you treat everyone around you as tools for your own selfish advancement and you never give a shit about what other people want. And yes, you are overweight. YOU ARE [[Obesity|OVERWEIGHT]]. at 5'10" and 216 lbs, your Body Mass Index is about 31, which classifies you as obese. And even that is probably a pretty low estimate - you weight moderately less than a person as fat as you would normally weigh, because muscle is denser than fat, and you have NO muscle. Look at yourself in the picture I included, really look at it. A nearly 29-year-old man should not have that giant gut hanging over his pants.

Do you know why most people don't like you? Do you know why women don't approach you, and why people don't praise you, and why people on the internet mock you? It's because you are a horrible, selfish, [[Ego|egotistical]] person. You have NO respect and NO consideration for other people. THAT is why you are alone and unloved. People will give you no compassion because you believe you don't have to show any to other people. It's not because people are "jealous" of you - they know your life sucks, they wouldn't want to be in your shoes. It's not because they're playing "[[kick the autistic]]". No one GIVES A SHIT that you are [[autistic]], they NEVER DID. People don't like you because you use your autism as a fucking excuse to refuse to do anything and demand that other people fix your problems for you. People don't like you because you want them to treat you like a fucking king at the same time as you treat them like shit. People don't like you because you act as if you are doing everything right and all your problems are someone ELSE'S fault when the truth is that your problems are all YOUR fault.

As I said, not a single thing in my last email was an insult. Not one bit. It was all true. IT IS ALL TRUE. Swallow your fucking pride and accept that I'm not insulting you just because I'm refusing to kiss your ass and make you face the uncomfortable truth about yourself. You know exactly what you have to do to fix your life, Chris. I know you do because [[Samantha Thaddeus E-mails|Samantha]] and I (and other people) have told you COUNTLESS TIMES what you need to do to improve your situation. No one else will do it for you. If you don't fix it, no one else ever will.

The way I see it, you have two choices:
1) Put your pride aside, admit you are not special and that you have to follow the same life rules as everyone else, and do the same exact hard work that everyone else needs to do to be happy.
2) Sit on your ass, continue whining that people like me who try to help you are "hurting your feelings", continue to believe that you are a special little snowflake who has endured far worse hardship than anyone else, and spend the rest of your life as a lonely virgin.

I can kind of see now why you love going to Rocky for counseling, and I also understand better what exactly Rocky does to "counsel" you. The answer to both is that she blows smoke up your ass, tells you that none of your problems are your fault, and that you don't have to take responsibility for yourself. And you love that, because you want everyone around you to just kiss your ass. Well, the flip side of that is that Rocky thinks your a retard who will never improve or have sex. I'M the one who believes you stand a chance, Chris. I'M the one who is telling you the truth while she lies to you because she thinks you're hopeless. But by all means, if you'd rather never get sex or love or happiness just so that you can continue to pretend that someone else is obligated to fix your life for you, then don't listen to me. Go ahead and close your mind to the truth when someone who actually WANTS to see you be HAPPY tries to tell it to you like it is. I hope you respond to this and keep an open mind, but I can't make you, and if you want to keep living in your own self-imposed hell I won't lose sleep over it.

Jackie}}
{{Email|November 25, 2010 - 4:58pm
Hey Chris! Just wanted to wish you happy turkey day. Are you and your family doing anything special today?

Jackie}}
{{EmailReply|November 26, 2010 - 4:25pm
Thanks for the Thanksgiving Greeting. It was pleasant.

I am not an egotisital, selfish man, andwhile the truth is appreciated
sometimes, there IS a certain level of Truth Telling that should Never
be Exceded, because of hurting the other's feelings and emotions worse
than they already are. Is Sympathy a Lost Art in this Damn Digital
Communicatve Age that makes more and more Society Autistic-like Every
day?

I am sorry for the wrongs I have done, but in this day and age, what I
Really Need is Friends in real Life I do not Have To E-Mail Ever, but
actually Hang Out In Person and Actually Hang Out and Positively
Encourage each other.

I have been in deep thought and self-checking towards how to better
improve myself, meet new people and whatever. I just do not care to
converse via e-mail or over the internet anymore. It is In Person in
Real Life or Bust for me.

Internet Socialization is BULL CRAP, and you can Quote me ALL OVER the
DAMN, FUCKING Internet, AND in the Newsletter Article, as you please.

Take Care and Stay Safe,

One Misunderstood, Lonely, Caring Idiot,

Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{EmailReply|November 26, 2010 - 7:36pm
And another thing, When constantly exceeding that Hurtful Truth Level
to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me,
"I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.}}

{{Email|November 26, 2010 - 8:24pm
Hey Chris! I'm glad your Thanksgiving went well. Anyway, I have some responses to each of your points, which I will put after each section of your writing.

''"I am not an egotisital, selfish man, andwhile the truth is appreciated sometimes, there IS a certain level of Truth Telling that should Never be Exceded, because of hurting the other's feelings and emotions worse than they already are."''

You are egotistical, because not only do you believe yourself to be an ideal partner for any woman in your present state without requiring change, but you also believe it is plausible and practical to remain in your comfort zone for your entire life, to the point that avoiding any kind of discomfort or displeasure is one of your primary life goals. You are most definitely selfish, as evidenced by your unwillingness to budge even the slightest bit when I asked you to step out of said comfort zone and give me something I wanted. You always tried to twist and warp my requests into something else entirely, then you egotistically told me "it's good enough like that", even though I am the one who would determine that, not you. The truths I told you were things you absolutely needed to hear, because you so strongly believed yourself to be a paragon of manhood and you were in such a strong denial that nothing else COULD get through to you. Throwing that bucket of water in your face was on the same principle on which interventions are conducted. I have been nice to you time and again, but you just refuse to listen when advice is given "nicely". Using harsh words was entirely necessary.

''"Is Sympathy a Lost Art in this Damn Digital Communicatve Age that makes more and more Society Autistic-like Every day?"''

I have two responses to this: First of all, sympathy has nothing to do with this. I have spent months sympathizing with you on every subject that bothers you, but it has gotten you nowhere. You still sit alone in your room, depressed and resentful toward the rest of the world. You don't listen when people sympathize with you. I chose my words very carefully because I KNEW they would shock you. I KNEW that shocking you was the only thing that might stand a chance of making you realize that you don't have the luxury of just sitting and waiting for the world to make itself perfect for you.

Secondly, you complain about not receiving sympathy, but when have you ever offered it? When people sympathize with you, all you end up doing is demanding that they fix your problems for you. You don't sympathize at all with people like me or Samantha when we get frustrated at how you routinely ignore our advice and would rather piss your life away playing video games. Friendship seems to be one-sided affair with you; you expect "sympathy" - which I think you misinterpret to mean "[[White knight|coddling]]" - but don't return the favor.

Thirdly, stop saying the internet is "making people autistic". That is grade A BULLSHIT. You bitch all the time about how everyone else has friends and relationships and can socialize, and how you are the only person who has your problems socializing; who then are these supposed people who are turning autistic? As I said, my words were deliberately chosen, I didn't "forget" how to "sympathize" with you just because my words came in an email instead of in person. I would have said the same exact thing to you in person. How about you stop playing the fucking PS Triple for 10 hours a day? Because I don't think you have a right to say others are addicted to the internet when you drop nearly every dollar you have buying stupid games on the internet.

''"I am sorry for the wrongs I have done, but in this day and age, what I Really Need is Friends in real Life I do not Have To E-Mail Ever, but actually Hang Out In Person and Actually Hang Out and Positively Encourage each other."''

Fair enough, it's nice to have friends in real life. So how's that working for you? How many people have you met out in the real world? You can't be talking about ME when you mention socializing in real life - we met online, so talking to me in real life would defeat your silly idea that internet socialization is worthless. Who else do you have? Or are you still expecting people to come up to you and do all the work for you? That's another perfect example of your egotism: You expect others to do all the work of creating a relationship with you, but you can't be bothered to put any effort into it yourself. You just say "I don't know what to do or where to go" as an excuse, despite the fact Samantha has given you many, many detailed ideas of how to start.

''"I have been in deep thought and self-checking towards how to better improve myself, meet new people and whatever. I just do not care to converse via e-mail or over the internet anymore. It is In Person in Real Life or Bust for me."''

I hope you're aware that "Bust" means "virgin forever". You've spent the past decade of your adult life putting absolutely no effort into anything, including making friends, so I don't see why you would start now. I've been doing nothing but trying to help you, but if you arrogantly think you can afford to just toss me away because I won't bend over backwards for a guy who never put effort into making me happy, then I guess I can't stop you. Hope your pride keeps you warm at night when you don't have any relationships.

''"Internet Socialization is BULL CRAP, and you can Quote me ALL OVER the DAMN, FUCKING Internet, AND in the Newsletter Article, as you please."''

Wow, thanks. Glad to see how worthless you consider all of your interactions with me. Is that the sort of "sympathy" you were complaining about not receiving?
As I said, you do nothing in real life, you just expect others to take care of you for your entire life. So I don't see how the internet is such an awful thing by comparison.

''"And another thing, When constantly exceeding that Hurtful Truth Level to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me."''

You've just written a large email telling me that you basically want to forget about me because email is inconvenient and because I don't kiss your ass enough. Once again, sterling display of reciprocity you show there, Chris. Everyone is supposed to be nice and sympathetic to you but you don't care what others think or feel or need.

So anyway, if you want to go your whole life without having to face the truth about yourself, that's fine. Just accept that you won't be respected as an adult and that you won't be getting a girlfriend or sex... ever.

Jackie}}

{{emails}}

[[Category:E-mails]]

Jackie E-mails 22

2010-12-04T00:44:37Z

Smtp: reply box fix

This page lists emails exchanged by Chris and [[Jackie]] from 13 to 20 [[November 2010]].

Chris states that he feels he needs to seek personal justice against the [[trolls]], specifically [[The Miscreants|the "Head Trolls"]], in order to continue his life. He still regrets his [[graduation]] day. Jackie points out that Chris seeks counseling from [[Rocky]] to rationalize Chris' laziness, and that her lack of qualification is doing more harm than good. Jackie presents the "Trollbusters" website, but Chris doesn't fall for it.

Chris recognizes he does not have capacity to have any adult relationships. Jackie agrees, though Chris lashes out at her for using the term "[[friend zone]]" and demands that [[sex]] stay on the table for when he demands. Jackie's reaction is as one would expect.

{{EmailReply|November 13, 2010 - 7:49pm
Well, for future references, I will let you know of any applicable
concerns. Mostly, I have been under constant [[stress]] from the emotional
and psychological damage the Trolls have done to me over the past 3
years and such. Plus having a dacade pass and not having the Class of
[[2000]] reunion and the regrets of how I acted at the ceremony and not
receiving an encouraging award for my [[Art|artistic]] talents are other
factors that weigh me down and lack self-confdence. I mainly won't
feel total peace of mind until All of the Trolls seeing Justice done
unto them for what they have done to me. And often feeling lonely
without someone to make me feel better with in-person consoling and
such. And hugs would make me feel better too.

Rocky offers me advice for most general things for counsoling. I can't
say all of the things she has helped me with off of the top of my head,
aside from the recent thinking of myself as retarded; She offered me a
more gentle way of putting it as being slow in the mental relays of
ideas and thoughts to actions and such.

[[Mao]] has Hacked into my websites, including the [[Cwcipedia]], and messed
them up royally. And Evan GAVE me rights to use his [[Simonchu]] character
as I saw fit, and later gives false accusatons of Character Theft on
me. He friggin' blackmailed me into killing [[Simonla]] and leaving [[Wild]]
witout a [[sweetheart]]. Those two can not go on forgiven without being
made examples of in their damned deeds before. [[Alec]] and [[Sean]] shall go
on forgiven, because all they did was draw their own dark-humored pages
and nothing else.

I'll e-mail you later.

Stay Safe,

Christian.}}

{{Email|November 13, 2010 - 9:00pm
Hey Chris!

So I'm a bit confused about Rocky. She has helped you think of new ways to... use different words to put yourself down? I don't get it. You are a smart person. Doesn't she tell you so? I don't get why she wouldn't refute your belief that you are [[retarded]], especially given how obvious it is how down and vulnerable you're feeling right now. Has she talked to you about more constructive things, like what you can do to be proactive about the various situations you aren't happy with? Like, for example, your high school reunion. Remember when I suggested you take an active role and pursue setting up the reunion yourself? Or doesn't she help you like that? It just kind of baffles me that she would allow you to keep feeling so bad about yourself and helpless about your situation when she knows how sad it makes you feel. I mean, doesn't she want to help things get better for you?

As for Evan, I think the main problem with Evan was that he was mad you violated his character. I mean, you took his male Simonchu and put a vagina on it. Didn't you always get mad that people drew a penis on your Rosechu? I think he just wanted you to respect the same standard that you demanded of other people. I don't know anything about Mao, I don't really know anything about him, but whatever. I'm glad you're going to give Alec the full honors and forgiveness, though. It'll be good for you to put that anger behind you.

Anyway, I'll talk to you soon.

Jackie}}

{{EmailReply| November 14, 2010 - 11:42pm

Well, perhaps I did not make it clear, but Rocky actually tries to make
me feel better about myself, and she does think of me as smart as well.
But, like I said, I don't recall every little etail, but when a better
example is recollected, I will describe it.

Somethng else, I realize that I have listed the Trolls as a major
letdown on myself. And I really want to seize justice unto them all
and take everything there is on the [[internet]] about me off of there, so
I can restart on a clean slate. And in the past, I have tried some
things aganst them, only to fail and have them counterattack me with
worse damage. Even stooping to their level as a fake troll has not
worked out for me. When authorities look up the details, I do not want
to be mistaken as one of those Trolls, instead of a victim of all of
the shitthey have done to me. What I would really like to do is locate
the head Trolls in Real Life and personally take them down one by one
myself. But A) I do not know where they each are located. B) Locating
their addresses online is harder than one would think; with their
hacking tricks, their aliases, fake addresses, etc. C) [[Money|Funds]] for
traveling outside of state is low for me. I am open for any real life,
offline suggestions towards success. In the meantime, I have been
there, done that as far as I can think of, and I am short on ideas, and
my mind is slow on coming up with anything within the big picture that
would be better han i was able to think of before.

Also, please let me know when you'd like to schedule another
conversaton over telephone. And how about that article in your school
newsletter about me we've talked about before.

I'll e-mail you later.

Stay safe,

Christian.}}

{{Email|November 15, 2010 - 9:33pm
Hey Chris!

Well, I'm still a bit confused on how Rocky helps you exactly. It seems like she's just fostering your negative feelings toward yourself. How has she actually helped you deal with any of your problems? I know she's told you to stay away from the trolls online, but it's painfully obvious how the trolls' actions throughout your life have just colored your entire present. You don't want to do do much of anything now because you're still so depressed about all that has happened throughout your life. Rocky tells you to just leave it be and not deal with it, but that's obviously not working for you. Is this how she helps you? By telling you to turn your back on life? I know when someone's advice is basically to do nothing and wait, it's easy to fall into a routine indefinitely, but doing nothing isn't working for you. You say that Rocky makes you feel good, but does she help you to be happy? Are you further along in your life because of her? It doesn't seem so.

And haven't you been trying to get the authorities on the trolls for a long time? I'm not really sure what they can do for you. And besides, you personally are guilty of a lot of the same activities against trolls that you want to accuse them of. you've attempted to get the police involved before, and to no avail. It's been, what, three years? You are obviously not satisfied with your situation, how has waiting changed that? How long has Rocky been talking about getting the "authorities" involved, and still nothing happens? I just don't see what offline methods would even work for you. It kind of sounds like you'd want to go to every troll's door and beat them up or something if you had the financial means to do so, but that would get you in a lot of legal trouble at best. (And besides, remember that you couldn't even do a single pull-up. I think you've got a long way to go physically before you could physically fight someone.)

I did some poking around and found this website called "trollbusters": http://internettrollbusters.wordpress.com/2010/10/04/profile-9-ian-crass-anders/
It looks like a group of people who are in a similar position as you, but they are actually doing something about it. You should join their cause! Your experiences are so unique, I bet you could be their spokesperson. Their needs to be someone who can stand up and lead the charge, not just sit on the sidelines and wait for someone else to take care of the problem. Can that hero be you, Chris? I think it can. I've been telling you for a long time, waiting isn't helping you. When someone is depressed, doing nothing only makes the depression worse, because it allows you to feel helpless. You have to actually take action yourself. Even if someone else solves a problem for you (which isn't happening here), you won't feel any better about yourself, because you'll be just as helpless as soon as the next problem comes around the corner. Join the trollbusters and contribute to the cause, Chris. Don't be a waiter, be a leader.

Anyway, how are my comic pages coming? You must be fairly close to done by now, right? Do you think I can have them by this Friday? I can't wait to see.

Jackie}}
{{EmailReply|November 16, 2010 - 4:19pm
To answer your concern about Rocky, I have felt ability to comfortably
move forward after a number of weekly meetings with her. Give her a
break, she s an old woman with a big family. I have looked up those
"Troll Busters" on that website before; I found a link on the Trollin'
Train Forum. I am suspicious about them; I felt and feel a vibe of
Buster-Pretending Trolls trying to lure me into their mental-scarring
trap(s) again. I will have the pages done by Friday, and I will send
you an e-mail with the zoomed-n photograps of each of all of the page
Friday Night. Also, yes, I have gone to the police, along with
Elizabeth and Rocky and [[Barb|my mom]] and [[Bob|dad]], and yes, I have heard very
little of anything they may or may not have done on the case.

I'll TTYL,

Stay Safe,

Christian.}}

{{Email|November 16, 2010 - 5:40pm

How have you moved forward? Every time you're asked to do something, you say that you can't because you're depressed because your "adult life sucks". You're always telling me how you can't get up the motivation to work or improve yourself or treat your addictions because you're so depressed over the trolls, even though they haven't done much of anything to you in a long long time. You continue to sit in your room, playing games all day, morbidly depressed because you have no friends and no social life, waiting for someone else to come rescue you from your sucky life so you don't have to do anything.

What does Rocky's family have to do with anything? I'm not attacking her, I'm pointing out how it seems like all she tells you is to do nothing and wait for the world to fix your problems for you, and that's making you miserable because it's not happening. And it's not going to happen. I really don't see why you're so quick to do whatever Rocky says without even thinking twice about it, but when I or anyone else suggests a course of action, you just sigh and come up with some excuse why you can't do it, or you plead for someone else do it for you. Frankly, I don't think it's a coincidence that I'm asking you to do work, and she asks you to do nothing, and wait for other people to solve your problems, and generally be lazy, and guess who you choose to listen to.

I'm sorry if this offends you but I have to be blunt but frankly it makes me tired and angry to see you just wallowing in your own misery and sadness and doing nothing about it.

Jackie

P.S. I know this is a fairly sensitive topic for you, Chris, and I know it probably troubles you for me to talk about it, and I'm sorry for that. But I trust that you won't discuss my words on this subject with Rocky, considering that it would be a conflict of interest for her to offer an opinion on it, and especially considering our recent talk about honesty and handling your problems like an adult. I am really trying here Chris, and I know I'm going deep into a sensitive issue, but I trust you and hope that you trust me and that you wouldn't betray my trust. I do care about you very much and your best interests are in my heart, Chris.}}

{{Email|November 18, 2010 - 4:51pm

Chris, have you been checking your email? I haven't heard from you. What's going on?

Samantha emailed me and said that you've mentioned me to your counselor Rocky recently. Have you communicated to her concerning the misgivings I shared with you about the way she advises you? I really hope you haven't, Chris, because like I said in my last email, that would put me in quite an awkward position with this woman I don't even know and I would feel pretty exposed and betrayed if you did it. I don't like the way she seems to just make you think that you're destined to be depressed and directionless and that you're helpless to change any of it. And obviously if you tell her I said that, she's not going to be able to offer a neutral opinion about it. And I really wouldn't feel comfortable with you sharing our private conversations with her - she's not a therapist, she has no legal obligation to keep secrets, and I don't like the idea of this woman having personal information of mine.

Like I said in my last message, I'm sorry if I struck a nerve, but it just felt like I needed to say something. And now you're making me feel just left hanging because you haven't responded.

Jackie}}

{{EmailReply|November 18, 2010 - 10:49pm
Well, firstly, I told Rocky about the good you and I shared in our past
conversations, and I told her of the bad with my own past concerns and
doubts; nothing bad about you.

Second, I've just talked to Samantha about relationships and [[Chris's Big Night Out|socializing]].
Before tonight, I have had the theory of me just not beng ready for a
relationship with my mental status. Also, all things having been
considered, at this point, I feel this relationship is not so strong,
and I feel I am not mentally ready for a relationship. I need more
socialization practice in real life for starters.

Communicating over the internet is one thing, but starting and
maintaining a relationship over the internet Without havng met in
Person Beforehand, I feel that is just too much for me.

Anyway, it is not you, it is me, and I am sorry.

As for the pages, I do not feel I can really complete drawing and
coloring them without really being able to forgive all four of them,
and as I have told you before, I can only really forgive two of them.
I am sorry for misspeaking and lying before, but I am just not ready to
forgive Mao and Evan, and I do not feel peace of mind or comfort in
finishing the pages.

Plus, sharing my feelings and emotions in person is easier to me than
typing them and sending them via e-mail.

Stay Safe,

Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{Email|November 19, 2010 - 4:27pm

Hey Chris!

You know something? That's all okay. I'm not angry or disappointed or anything. I think I've at least partly known for a long time that you didn't really feel right about everything. It's okay if you aren't ready for a relationship or sex. Not everyone is ready for those things at the same time, and everyone must follow his own individual growth rate. And it wouldn't be right of me to pressure you into an adult situation that you just aren't ready for. So don't feel bad about friend-zoning me, okay? Being friend-zoned isn't always a bad thing, sometimes it's a good thing, because it allows you to see the situation from a new angle and grow. You need to take care of yourself first and foremost, and I respect that.

Well, I'm glad that you feel like you can share your feelings with someone, even if it is Rocky. But I hope you feel like you can share your feelings with me too. I was a bit worried, because the way you brought her up, I thought maybe you shared our emails with her or something, which would be a terrible breach of trust. You didn't do that, right?

Like I said, I don't feel good about this woman, it seems like she just tells you what you want to hear; she gives you a way to rationalize hiding from your problems, rather than helping you find ways to actually improve them. Because I care about you Chris, I do have to ask again, how has your life really improved from following her advice? You are still very obviously depressed and lonely and dissatisfied with the place your life is in. Maybe you should see a therapist instead. I believe psychiatric care is actually free in the state of [[Virginia]], but I don't know for sure, you should look into that. I think someone who has medical knowledge and experience dealing with autism and social disorders and such would be able to help you more than Rocky, who doesn't really seem to be qualified for those things.

Anyway, please write back to me. Even if we aren't pursuing a romantic relationship anymore, I'd still really like to be your friend, and I think you could really use one. Also, Lars really liked you too, I'm sure he'd love to hear from you again.

Jackie}}

{{EmailReply|November 20, 2010 - 12:26pm

**Firstly, I had not made Rocky aware of any of your e-mails, but
recently, to inform her of the "Troll Busters" website and make her
aware of you, I forwarded Only this one e-mail from the 15th. I did
not put you in any bad light with her, at least I did not mean to.

Also, I felt uncomfortable reading the term, "[[Friend zone|Friend Zoning]]" in your
recent message; I have been Friend Zoned myself a number of times, and
I have watched the movie "[[Wikipedia:Just Friends|Just Friends]]", so I get irritated upon
hearing or reading the term, regardless of sub-definitions for any
situaton. I mean, I am a dude, and I did and will want the sex, and I
am very mentally ready for sex with being responsible. I'd like to
keep that option open, is what I'm initially saying here.

On another topic, I am going to concentrate on taking the head trolls,
and all of their webstes down, legally, with the help of my church. I
have an idea of where to begin, by looking up an old [[Pokemon]] [[Card games|TCG League]]
member and his friend who turned on me that Friday night when [[Megan]]
kissed her Christopher.

I will see justice done unto those bastards yet, to regain te peace of
mind I had before was made aware of that damn E.D. page.

Stay Safe,

Christian.}}

{{Email|November 20, 2010 - 2:25pm

Hey Chris. Thanks for writing back.

Firstly, I'm sorry if my use of the term "friend zone" made you uncomfortable, but it is what you did, I'm just calling it like it is. I was pursuing a relationship and you basically said "no thanks, I'd rather just be friends". Like I said, that doesn't bother me, but I don't get why you are uncomfortable by me calling it the proper name. I mean, if you steal a [[toy]] from a store, would you feel uncomfortable with being called a thief?

Secondly, I'm kind of insulted that you think that there is an option for sex available here. Why would I have kept trying to get a relationship off the ground if all I wanted from you was a booty call? I'm not that kind of girl Chris, I feel like you don't respect me when you say that. I mean, I've been pretty patient all the while with you, putting up with your constant lies and laziness and whatnot, and you showed you didn't really think enough of me to do anything I wanted. I thought when you admitted you weren't ready for a relationship, you knew sex was off the table, too. I can have sex with Lars if I want, and he gives me the adult interaction too.

Sex and relationships are part of the same package, Chris. If you aren't ready for one, you aren't ready for the other. Just because you're physically capable of sticking your penis in a girl doesn't mean that you have what it takes to give her what SHE needs. The fact that you think you can give up on a relationship and still get a girl to have sex with you, but not have to worry about doing anything for her, is proof that you aren't ready for sex - it's retardedly naïve. Maybe in a few years or so, once you are willing to put aside your own desires and actually think of what the other person wants for once. But for now, I think you should practice abstinence; focus on improving yourself emotionally and on improving your life. Get a job, move out on your own, take on some adult responsibilities. Then, maybe, you'll be ready to start considering sex again. But if you keep going the way you're going, trying to put the cart before the horse and pursuing sex to the detriment of all other goals, you'll just keep shooting yourself in the foot, because you'll be pursuing something you're not in a place to get while ignoring other life goals that desperately need your attention. You're not getting any younger Chris, your 20's are already slipping away.

Speaking of Rocky, it was also wrong of you to forward that email to her without asking me. That was a conversation in which I had every right to expect my privacy to be respected, and you betrayed that. This is another piece of proof that you aren't ready for grown-up things like sex - you need to understand that other people have rights, not just yourself.

Anyway, you've been talking for a long, long, long time about going after the trolls, going after the people from [[the Game Place]], getting [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]your church to be your personal army, etc. You've yet to do anything about it. And you haven't really explained how your life has gotten better from Rocky's advice, either. Have you considered that she just tells you what she knows will make you feel better for the immediate moment, but in exchange she doesn't help you deal with the root of your problems, and that's why you're still every bit as miserable as you have been for years? She doesn't sound like a very good counselor to me. She just feeds these go-nowhere fantasies about righteous revenge that you sit stewing on, and meanwhile you're letting the rest of life pass you by.

Hope to hear back soon,

Jackie}}

{{emails}}

[[Category:E-mails]]

2007

2010-12-02T02:48:57Z

Smtp:

__NOEDITSECTION__
[[Image:0940-CWCsAppreaciation.JPG|thumb|Chris in '''2007'''.]]
[[Image:2007.JPG|thumb|Graph showing the Google-popularity of the terms ''Sonichu'' (red) and ''Christian Weston Chandler'' (blue). 2007 is marked in Mellow Yellow.]]
[[Image:ShecameforCWC (200803).JPG|thumb|In protest to 2007's creation of the [[ED]] page, he draws himself fingerfucking his best friend.]]
[[Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|thumb|On '''11 February 2007''', Chris made this.]]
[[Image:SoulCalibur3box.jpg|thumb| On '''8 May 2007''', [[MLW]] gets it in [[Soul Calibur|SCIII]].]]
[[Image:CWCinDailyProgressJuly142007.jpg|thumb|'''July 2007''']]
[[Image:Chrischannov2007.jpg|thumb|On '''26 October 2007''', this picture is taken at [[The GAMe PLACe]].]]
[[Image:MaryWantsIt.JPG|thumb|One of the images Chris drew on '''11 November 2007'''.]]

'''The year we made contact.'''

The second half of the year '''2007''' shows some important developments within [[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s life.

Firstly, Chris enters and loses the [[PaRappa the Rapper Contest]], leaving him disillusioned and enraged.

Secondly, he discovers a satirical page written about him on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. These two injustices lead Chris into a bitter, long and frustrated [[rage]], eventually giving spark to certain deep, complex and mysterious aspects of madness within his person, that, when revealed, would prove to be a decisive factor leading to obsessive [[troll]]ing in [[2008]].

==Events of 2007==

===February===
* February 11 - Christian makes the cover for his [[Chris's DVD|"I'm on TV" DVD]].
* February 19 - Christian starts making the slideshow for his DVD.
* February 22 - Christian finishes the slideshow.
* February 24 - Christian's 25th birthday.
* February 24 - Chris releases his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"future message"]].

===March===
* March 5 - Chris draws (the cover of) ''[[Sonichu 7|Sonichu #7]]''.
* March 6 - In response to an email from Chris about the DVD, [[Cole Smithey]] expresses his disdain for [[Barbara]] and [[Bob]].
* March 6 - Chris cashes in his first [[My Coke Rewards]] points, beginning a campaign that will see him consume more than 2500 bottles worth of Coke.
* March 17 - Chris realizes that he is able to afford a 60GB Playstation 3, so he goes out and invests in one.

===May===
* May 8 - Christian creates his first [[YouTube]] account.
* May 8 - Christian uploads a video of him beating up [[Mary Lee Walsh]] in ''[[Soul Calibur]]''.

===June===
* June 6 - [[Megan]] leaves for Kentucky.
* June ?? - Chris stops working as a volunteer assistant Gym Leader at [[The Game Place]].
* June 27 - Christian states that he is saddened, as Megan has left for Kentucky. He misses her.
* June 27 - Christian cries with his mother whilst thinking of [[Patti]] the dog.
* June 29 - Christian makes his ''PaRappa the Rapper'' video and enters [[PaRappa the Rapper Contest]].

===July===
* July 7 - Unable to fornicate with his dog anymore, Christian buys a Velvet Touch masturbator.
* July 14 - Chris is featured in the [[:File:CWCinDailyProgressJuly142007.jpg|Daily Progress]] section of his local newspaper.
* July 16 - Chris buys himself an [[Officer Nasty]] love doll.
* July 18 - Chris hears his Parappa video has made it to the final rounds. He is overjoyed.
* July 23 - Megan's 21st birthday. She is still in Kentucky, and Chris misses her.

===August===
* August 3 - [[Adam Stackhouse]] wins the PaRappa the Rapper Contest.
* August 3 - Christian immediately sends an enraged e-mail to [[Sony]]. He is furious because he didn't get the opportunity to impress Megan.
* August 3 - In an e-mail to Megan, Christian admits to cheating to win the PaRappa the Rapper Contest.
* August 4 - Christian writes another angry letter to Sony, explaining why the other contestants should be disqualified. He also curses Adam Stackhouse in his [[PSN Blogs#4 August 2007 — Adam Stackhouse!!!|PSN blog]], which results in an admin timing him out.
* August 8 - Megan sends Christian an angry letter, complaining about him touching her. She says she is happy he lost the contest. According to Chris: "It hurt so fucking much, it took me weeks to recover."
* August 8 - Christian apologizes to Megan for "touching" her.
* August 10 - Sony responds to Christian's e-mail. They don't take him seriously.
* August 13 - Christian writes to Megan about having confessed his love to her.
* August 20 - Chris buys himself another Officer Nasty love doll, possibly because his other one suffered an internal injury.
* August ?? - '''Video''' Chris uploads [[CWC is Angry]].

===September===
* September 4 - [[Bob]]'s birthday. Chris makes him a cake.[http://www.mediafire.com/?q6dsbzkgteqxpp6]

===October===
* October 3 - Christian buys a LAI MI Asian sex doll.
* October 8 - Christian apologizes to Megan for being too pushy.
* October 19 - Christian shows hostile behavior towards a friend of Megan.
* October 20 - Christian apologizes to Megan for his hostile behavior. He blames it on his homophobia.
* October 26 - The day that the trolling of Chris began. He is photographed at the Game Place playing ''[[Pokémon]]''. The same day he gets [http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2636398&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=8#post335082042 mentioned] in a SomethingAwful thread (Requires ''Archives'' account to view) by one of his former classmates at PVCC.
* October 27 - Due to the Ulillillia thread getting derailed, a [http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2667671 thread on SomethingAwful] is created about Chris. (Requires ''Archives'' account to view.)
* October 31 - The SomethingAwful Sycophant Squad (SASS) creates a thread on Chris titled ''Sonichuuuuuuuu...''
* October 31 - [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page is created (according to Christian - according to the history, it was created a bit later).

===November===
* November 2 - Christian discovers the ED page and becomes furious. Again according to himself, this is also contradicted by the time for the page's creation.
* November 3 - The Chris-Chan article on ED is created at 5:45 PM (Ruckersville time) by [[Jason Kendrick Howell]].
* November 3 - [http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=7631380&x=sonichu 4chan Fan-Art thread]. [[Evan]] e-mails some of the images to Chris.
* November 4 - [http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=7656940&x=sonichu+response Chris is angered] by the sexual imagery of Sonichu and himself. He demands a picture of Rosechu "masturbating and squirtin'".
* November 5 - Barbara finds out about him being photographed at the [[Game Place]], and goes mad.
* November 5 - In and E-Mail to Anna, Chris discloses that he has been chatting with [[Lori Lopez]].
* November 7 - Christian shoots a [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|video]] asking to have the ED article edited to "better reflect his personality".
* November 9 - Barbara goes to the Game Place and questions manager [[Michael (Game Place)|Michael]] about the picture that was taken. She asks to be offered a seat, but as there is no seat, she has to sit on the floor.
* November 10 - [[Michael (Game Place)|Michael]] tells Chris that if he brings up ED once again, he will be banned from the Game Place.{{cite}}
* November 10 - A picture of Goatse is added to the ED page, and Christian finally breaks down and creates the Reldnahc account to remove it. He then begins [[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#November_2007|rewriting the article]] in a more favorable light towards him.
* November 11 - In response to she-male and homoerotic Sonichu fan art on the ED page, Chris draws five [[Rule 34]] drawings and adds them to the article in protest. Most feature his Sonichu characters; one in particular depicts himself fingering a woman who is later identified as Megan.
* November 12 - Chris adds entries from his [[CWC's Diary|diary]], details about how he lost Megan, and information about his sex doll [[Officer Nasty]] to the ED page. By now Chris has willingly provided 90% of the information that will be used to mock him henceforth.
* November 15 - Christian tries to hack ED using HTML. It doesn't work.
* November 23 - Chris buys a 160 GB SATA hard drive for his PS3, greatly increasing its storage space.

===December===
* December 23 - Chris apparently abandons [[CWC's Cool Profile]].
* December 26 - Chris buys [[Kimmi]], the anime love doll, on Adamandeve.com, probably because his parents didn't buy it for him as a Christmas gift.
* December 28 - Once again, Chris returns to [[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#December_2007|editing]] the text of his ED article into a more positive one.
* December 30 - With a new ED account, "Chris-Chan", Chris starts vandalizing ED.
* December 30 - Christian writes the poem "[[For My True Love, I Would…]]".<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2007]]</ref>

==References==
<references />

{{Timeline}}

[[Category:Chronology]]

Challenge for Clyde

2010-11-29T01:00:11Z

Smtp: /* Fan videos */ Gone

[[File:SoFuckinCash.jpg|thumb|What would really happen.]]
"'''Challenge for Clyde'''" (originally "'''10112009'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] calls out [[Gregg Mays]]/[[Clyde Cash]]. He makes mention of friends several times in this video, which is odd because Chris has none. We also see more of Chris's fumbling attempts at martial arts, first seen in [[ACWCAudition]]. Throughout, he sounds oddly like Frankenstein's Monster (or at least, [[Speech Impediment|more so than usual]]). He also regularly stares off-screen, almost as though he's reading something.

==Video==
{{Tardrage}}
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Challenge for Clyde
| image = {{#ev:youtube|BCw5SPPf0zs}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 11 October 2009
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = {{Violence}} [[Death threats|Violence]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:rage.png]] Rage
| Saga = [[Image:clyde_saga.png]] Clyde saga
| Shirt = {{StraightWhiteLinesShirt}} Straight White Lines
| previous = [[Warning_-_Naughty_Women_;)| Warning - Naughty Women ;)]]
| next = [[Chris_Loses_It| Chris_Loses_It]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===

[[Image:THAT_ONE'S_ON_THE_HOUSE4.gif|thumb|Chris's rage in it's [[TRUE and HONEST]] form]]
[[Image:THAT ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.gif|thumb|left|THAT ONE'S ON THE [[house|HOUSE]]]]

Greeegg.. Greg Mays. [[Clyde Cash]]. ''Whatever the hell your real name is''.

You need to ''stop''. ''Torturing''. My ''[[gal pals|FRIENDS]]''. Over the internet. And everywhere. I am your target. ''You'' want to face ''me''. Co- I know, you do. You come to me. [[CWCFighter|I will fight you.]] I will ''crush'' you! You, you son of a bitch. I would beat you up mercilessly. What you have done to me and my friends. Every last ''one'' of them! [[Song of Christian#Part 2|Rrrruggh]]. [[I AM STRONG|I am strong]], man. You do not want to mess with me. But you ''should'' come out and face me like a man, instead of hiding behind your goddamn. Mother's. Skirt. You are just a coward, just like every last damn stupid [[troll]] on the internet. I'm calling you out, Gregg Mays/Clyde Cash! I'm calling you out! You know where I live! You come right on over... and I will s- and we can settle this ''man to man''. RARH!

You wanna see how hard I would punch ya? [''picks up book''] This is a good heavy book! [''throws book''] I will punch you so hard [''bends over, picks up book again''] And I would even let you give me a few punches! [''punches self stupidly''] That one's on the house. [''punches self again''] [''punches self in stomach''] You wanna- come on? You wanna face me? Come on! Face me man! You face me! You face me right now, you son of a bitch! You face me! [''does some poorly executed "fighting moves", including hitting himself twice in the face again, and roars''] Come on, you son of a bitch! I'm challenging you! You come face me right now! You come face me, you damn son of a bitch! [''holds index finger up to camera, calms down'']

[''quietly''] Come- come face me. I'll be waiting. I'll be '''''waiting'''''. [''gives the finger'']

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Strongman: The Movie
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KZnaPvs8W7k}}
| Stardate = 12 [[October 2009]]
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/OhhhMyAxels OhhhMyAxels]
| Subject = The highly anticipated sequel to [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ywpeXlkGx9Q "Repentance and Comeuppance"]
| Video Type = Remix
| Other Info =
}}

==See also==
*[[A CWC Audition]]
*[[CWCFighter]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Warning - Naughty Women ;)]]|nextlink=[[Chris Loses It]]|}}
{{Troll Videos}}

{{Clyde Saga}}

[[Category:Videos with RAGE]]

Talk:Main Page

2010-11-27T01:02:37Z

Smtp: /* Slight Error */

{{protip|This talk page should serve as a place to discuss improving the overall front page of CWCki. For discussion on improvements to CWCki overall, please see the [[CWCki:Community Portal|Community Portal]]. For discussing individual front page templates, please refer to the discussion pages of those templates.}}

'''Archives''': [[Talk:Main Page/Archive 1|1]] [[Talk:Main Page/Archive 2|2]]

==Protect the templates==
Seeing how the main page itself is protected, why not protect the templates as well? [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 16:49, 11 September 2010 (PDT)
*There's already cascading protection for all the front page templates. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:51, 11 September 2010 (PDT)
*Stop freaking out about this spammer shit, Champ has it under control --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 16:53, 11 September 2010 (PDT)

== new vid ==

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzAJvMKQeJA&feature=player_embedded

can't add news so there you go--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 13:38, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

==Can this be the new Quote of the Now, please?==

{{quote|I've learned... from my father; he taught and showed me which male ends go into which female ends.|Wallflower E-mails.}}

[[User:Bunsteaks|Bunsteaks]] 13:28, 25 September 2010 (PDT)
I'm for this too.
[[User:Theiselybors|Theiselybros]] 02:10, 21 October 2010 (EST)

==I suggest this for the Video of the Now==

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmFHPbaNT04 [[User:Xavier|Xavier]] 07:37, 28 September 2010 (PDT)

Since there's a white space in the Video of the Now (at least on my computer) why not feature this video? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoqjN3amRD4
--[[User:Vofdoom38|VofDoom38]] 17:44, 21 October 2010 (PDT)

== Project Map Fucking Everything ==

Started up this project and got a lot of things mapped down.

http://maps.google.com/maps/ms?hl=en&gl=us&ptab=2&ie=UTF8&oe=UTF8&msa=0&msid=116038930500742252038.0004949e055d81dc61c0b

I'd like to get all of the places he mentions/visits/films/rapes marked down on the map, but there's a lot of videos and some of them I never wish to see again. So, it's open collaboration and anyone with a Google account can edit it. Feel free to login and mark down different areas he's visited. Just try to be logical and succinct when adding locations. Don't need every McDonald's marked down. When doing videos of him travelling, try to figure out the path with a line and mark at least one end of it.

Now, a question:
Should we make a page for the full map or just link it in the bottom of the "Locations" divs on the other pages?
-- [[User:Arius|Arius]] 13:49, 9 November 2010 (PST)

*Put it on the locations template. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 13:53, 9 November 2010 (PST)
**Done. Couldn't think of a better name than Chris's World. -- [[User:Arius|Arius]] 14:11, 9 November 2010 (PST)

== Sports ==

Is there any inclination that Chris is into any kind of sport or professional sports team? I asked this on the main page because I don't know where else to ask it.
*Sign your fucking posts god damn. Also, no. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 04:18, 14 November 2010 (PST)

== Slight Error ==
Chris hasn't gone 5 days without the internet, he logged into youtube 2 1/2 days after he posted the leaving video.
[[User:Theiselybors|Theiselybros]] 19:46, 26 November 2010 (EST)
:Probably should have discussed this before just removing the counter... [[User:Smtp|Smtp]] 17:02, 26 November 2010 (PST)

CWCki:Technical

2010-11-23T01:05:44Z

Smtp: /* Default Skin */

__NEWSECTIONLINK__

{{Community Portal}}

For discussion of errors, extensions, and technical stuff in general(yes we know about the 500 errors).

== upgraded to 1.16.0 ==

seems like all the obvious stuff is fixed but if there are any missing extensions you need please let me know --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 02:39, 2 August 2010 (PDT)

==Audio hosting==
Seeing as how some of the audio recordings that we link to on some pages have been removed from their file hosting sites, I was thinking maybe instead of having people download audio we simply host it here CWCiki side. An example of what I am talking about can be found here.[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:FDR_speech.ogg] [[User:CrassCrab|CrassCrab]] 10:14, 3 August 2010 (PDT)
: This could be doable, but needs server configuration. From user's point of view, it could be a simple matter of converting the files to Ogg Vorbis and uploading them here. Currently, the upload page doesn't accept .ogg files, and files are limited to 7 MB. In order to make the in-browser support work, we'd need the [http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:OggHandler OggHandler extension] (which needs ffmpeg and other leet stuff installed on the server as well). --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 03:12, 6 August 2010 (PDT)

==Apache Module versus CGI==
I've been a long time lurker, but the prevalence of 500 Internal Server Errors has prompted me to register an account. I've lurked and searched the CWCki to see if this has been suggested, but I didn't see anyone bring up this potential solution. So I apologize if I'm offering a redundant suggestion. These error messages seem to suggest to me that the Wiki software is running on CGI. A lot of CGI-related performance issues can be remedied by running PHP via an Apache module, rather than as a CGI binary. The PHP CGI binary is invoked, processes a script, and then shuts down every time a page is requested. Apache modules are continuous, thread safe processes (thread safety can be build dependent). I'm not sure if this hosting provider offers such a configuration option, but it may be worth looking into one that does if this becomes an increasingly prominent issue. FastCGI may be a worthwhile alternative to the current configuration if an Apache module is not an option because of some inherent limitations with Wiki software. [[User:Sheex|Sheex]] 10:28, 24 August 2010 (PDT)

== 500 internal server error poll ==
Please note what page you received it on and what your action was (view/edit/etc...). [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 14:25, 5 October 2010 (PDT)
*Main Page/View - It happens sometimes when I try going here on a new window. --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 18:14, 5 October 2010 (EST)
:*I almost always get it when saving an edit, sometimes when I log in. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam & Eggs]] 17:10, 5 October 2010 (PDT)
::*Same here.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 18:08, 5 October 2010 (PDT)
:::*That's actually been happening to me quite a bit, recently. --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 21:23, 5 October 2010 (EST)
::::Extra processing and memory is used while saving a page, and since lack of memory is the likely cause of the error - it's unsurprising that you encounter it when doing the above. Implementing global caching would help alleviate server load, as currently every page request from logged in users is generating server processing. Longer pages have more chance of generating the error - as they are larger, and take up more memory while being processed. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 18:30, 5 October 2010 (PDT)
:::::I'll back up the main page and saving edits. I almost never get them otherwise recently. Sometimes I get them if I try to open a page in a tab. The way I browse, I open links I want to read in tabs in tabs to where I can continue reading the page I'm on without having to come back and remember where I was. The tabs will 500 error about 25% of the time. [[User:BubblegumPinkButler|BubblegumPinkButler]] 14:22, 6 October 2010 (PDT)
* Got one this morning on the Main page. I didn't do anything in particular other than trying to open it. --[[User:ErsatzHouse|ErsatzHouse]] 12:55, 8 October 2010 (PDT)

== Is the CWCki faster now? ==
Is it? Do you get the 500 internal server error still? [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 20:39, 5 October 2010 (PDT)
*It's better. Though it still takes a little while to load longer pages after editing, and I've only experienced one error message while searching for some video. It's a good start, though. --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 00:02, 6 October 2010 (EST)
::Yes it's very fast when not doing things like editing/saving pages (as to be expected). The changes made should hopefully mean fewer errors for everyone, and it seems like a much faster article-browsing experience too. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 21:18, 5 October 2010 (PDT)
*I still get a lot of 500 Internal Server Errors. Not as many as before but it still happens a noticeable amount. It's as fast as it was before; I don't see any difference. [[User:Yossarian|Yossarian]] 13:26, 6 October 2010 (PDT)
*I've only gotten one today. Usually I get at least three.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 21:35, 9 October 2010 (PDT)
**Okay, today I got bitchslapped by the error when trying to edit that stupid prank call page.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 21:24, 15 October 2010 (PDT)
*I only seem to get 500 errors when requesting pages which are not static (i.e. edit pages, recent changes, histories, diffs). The odd 500 error I get when browsing regular articles tends to be on ones that are subject to a lot of recent edits, such as a new video article. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 05:52, 13 October 2010 (PDT)

== Default Skin ==

I think we should make Vector the default skin for the CWCki, as MonoBook is pretty dated and Vector gives wikis a very clean appearance. A lot of wikis are adopting Vector for this reason. The layout differences are fairly minor, so it really shouldn't give anyone much trouble by making it the default. Users who really dislike it can still change back to MonoBook in their prefs.

* [http://www.sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Main%20Page&useskin=vector Preview Vector on the Main Page]
* [http://www.sonichu.com/w/index.php?title={{FULLPAGENAME}}&useskin=vector Preview Vector on this page]
* [http://polldaddy.com/poll/4120043/ Vote here]
Your thoughts please! --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 20:11, 19 November 2010 (PST)
:Personally I find Monobook more simplistic and nice, as well as more familiar. But we'll see. -- [[User:Mexican|Mexican]] 21:03, 19 November 2010 (PST)
:Vector is clunky and confusing. I prefer Monobook. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 21:38, 19 November 2010 (PST)
:Monobook is only used by autistics. Vector should be the new default skin.--[[User:Inos|Inos]] 22:09, 19 November 2010 (PST)
:Vector's kinda pretty! --[[User:NerdyNautilus|NerdyNautilus]] 10:36, 19 November, 2010 (PST)
:<s>I could defend either one but they're both shitty white default skins so I honestly don't give a damn. If I had to choose I'd say the one we have now is fine, there's no reason to change it for the sake of changing it. That's how Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts and Bolts raped my childhood.</s> Fuckfuck fuck that noise. I forgot vector moves the searchbar to the top, and it was confusing as fuck when Wikipedia did it. Vector can eat a dick.--[[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]] 23:45, 19 November 2010 (PST)
::The search box movement is about the only major layout change in Vector. There's a reason why Wikipedia changed the default to Vector - it's nicer. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 06:34, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:Vector is made of AIDS. Monobook works just fine. --[[User:Reimu H|Reimu H]] 05:40, 20 November 2010 (PST)
::I don't see how Vector is made of AIDS. Just because something works is not a reason to not consider changing it. While some people clearly prefer MonoBook because it's been the default for so long, I was hoping that people would see that it does give a cleaner appearance to the CWCki and that from the average reader's perspective - it can be more aesthetically pleasing. The design of Vector is more fluid than MonoBook, with less grey and more light colours. The removal of the grey book background is one noticeable change that definitely lightens up articles. With Wikipedia and several other major wikis already using Vector, it should make the CWCki feel more familiar for the average reader. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 06:34, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:::I don't know, it feels like Vector is just using cheap gradient tricks and light blue colors to seem nicer, but really it's actually making everything bigger and less streamlined. I tink the only people who are really going to come to CWCki are nerds of course, and they probably more appreciate the monobook look. -- [[User:Mexican|Mexican]] 08:36, 20 November 2010 (PST)
::::Use of gradients is fairly minor, and is done because the skin is not meant to be very heavy. It doesn't really make things bigger - the default size for menu links is indeed larger than MonoBook, but it adds to the clean and clear factor of Vector. The sidebar is about the same width. Vector seems very streamlined to me. I disagree with both the claim that the majority of our visitors are nerds and the claim that they will appreciate monobook more. If they're familiar with Wikipedia, they'd be more likely to appreciate Vector. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 08:50, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:I say we keep Monobook, the movement of the search bar is the big problem with Vector. At least we're not using Oasis, which is Wikia's new skin. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam & Eggs]] 07:14, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:There are a number of issues I have with Vector. First of all, raising the search bar makes it so that I have to scroll to the top of even small articles to search, which is a minor irritant, but an irritant nonetheless. Secondly, the breaking up of the "Page/Discussion" and "Edit/View History" makes it more difficult to quickly navigate an article (I use a trackpad, so moving across the screen is not really something I like to do). Thirdly, the "Watch" button is hidden in the little menu next to "View History" - and it's the only thing there. That just bothers me, and besides, when I want to watch a page, I'd like to only have to click once. I suppose the only other two changes that I can see that matter are that 1) the bottom bar is now different (to which I am indifferent, as I never use that bar anyway) and 2) the Donation ad appears to be gone, although that might be easily corrected (and again, I am indifferent). I honestly think what we have appears more professional (looks like a portfolio to me) and is more compact (because it is). To me, Vector/Monobook is like Mac/Windows. Protip: Windows is better. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 07:33, 20 November 2010 (PST)
::You know that the little dropdown next to View history should be on-hover and not on-click, so it should still only be one click. The dropdown contains more options if you're an admin. I rarely use the watched pages feature though - so I guess I've never really been worried about where the link is for it. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 07:37, 20 November 2010 (PST)
Thing is this isn't a professional & widely-used wiki like Wikipedia. It's a wiki dedicated to doccumenting the trolling of a fat retard from Virginia. Besides, you said we'd be able to change it back to Monobook if the default layout was changed right? Why can't there just be an alternative option to change the layout to Vector for those who want it instead of changing the default layout to Vector? --[[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]] 07:59, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:You can manually configure Vector to be your default skin already. The idea of setting Vector to be our default skin would be to make the CWCki nicer to the majority of users who simply come here as readers, who may not have accounts, and who may be unaware of the fact wikis allow you to change your skin. The vast majority of visitors to CWCki are readers, and I think it would be nicer for them to experience CWCki with Vector. I don't think the subject of this wiki makes either skin a better or worse choice. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 08:50, 20 November 2010 (PST)
::/shrug. Set up a vote on the Main Page then. --[[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]] 09:04, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:Meh. Personally, I hate Vector, but it'll make the wiki look more pro. Anyone as particular as me about it can just change it ourselves. [[User:Enibure|Enibure]] 09:34, 20 November 2010 (PST)

: I feel that Vector has a "food court" aesthetic that I don't like, plus everybody is used to Monobook already. I support the "keep Monobook, but let people change to vector if they want" motion. Is there a problem with Monobook, or is it just a matter of keeping up with the Joneses? -[[User: GrotchManchowder|GrotchManchowder]] 12:36 PM, 20 November 2010 (EST)
:I support the "vote on the Main Page" idea. If you're worried that staying like this will be worse for the average, account-free Joe, just make it say something like "Hey anon faggot come vote here" or some shit. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 09:53, 20 November 2010 (PST)

: I don't like how Vector has the search bar at the top right. It's a lot more convenient when it's near the navigation and toolbox windows. [[User:Mr3urious|Mr3urious]] 10:11, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:: Then again, I ''am'' getting used to Wikipedia's layout. [[User:Mr3urious|Mr3urious]] 10:13, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:Everything but not what the Wikipedia is using right now. I hate it even more that these huge-ass "personal appeals" from Jimbo begging for my money that I keep clicking on accidentally. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 10:22, 20 November 2010 (PST)

:I don't really have a preference. Vector has a nice professional feeling to it (but then, none of us are professionals, just bored trolls following the misadventures of an overweight manchild... but that's off-topic), but Monobook has more nostalgic appeal to me. Whatever's best. [[User:N. Onymous|N. Onymous]] 10:58, 20 November 2010 (PST)

:I vote for vector! [[User:PeachyKeen|PeachyKeen]] 11:17, 20 November 2010 (PST)

:Both are equally good. [[User:OrsonZedd|OrsonZedd]] 11:54, 20 November 2010 (PST)

:Vector is awesome, and I use it in every wiki that supports it, mostly because you don't really need to look for the search box (in some MonoBook sites, its location kind of depends on what the admins have been drinking over the past week). But I don't know if I have any preference either way as to whether it should be made default. People who are logged out can't edit the wiki and people who are logged in can change the preference, so it's hard to start weighing the usability and the skins don't really affect the way the articles look like. No harm going either way. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 11:58, 20 November 2010 (PST)

Vector looks bloated. Like Chris. [[User:CrassCrab|CrassCrab]] 12:34, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:You make it sound suitable for CWCki then :P Also seems like we have [http://polldaddy.com/poll/4120043/ a poll up for voting]! --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 13:27, 20 November 2010 (PST)

Essentially I'm tempted to push for the change to Vector as default anyway. We have to look at this from the perspective of "what is best for new users/readers" rather than what is best for the small number of users who hold accounts and choose to voice their opinions. Overall, Vector is widely accepted as being far better for users than MonoBook is - Wikipedia would not have been as bold as to switch to it if that wasn't the case. Don't forget that if anyone really doesn't like Vector, they can easily switch back to MonoBook in their userprefs. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 15:37, 20 November 2010 (PST)
*Hence the vote, which doesn't require an account. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 15:39, 20 November 2010 (PST)
::Doesn't mean that the right people will vote though. For instance, a lot of people enter the CWCki sideways, via search engines to certain pages rather than the main page. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 15:50, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:::The people who look at one article and leave won't even use the search bar. This change appeals to the regs, and the regs will almost definitely check the front page for updates on Chris. I think this gives us as accurate a representation as possible. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 16:00, 20 November 2010 (PST)
::::The change affects everyone, it will be more noticeable to the regs, but overall it's a change that will improve familiarity and usability for the majority of users. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 16:03, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:::::I think a vote is the best way to get the general consensus. If you think it will increase validity by putting the vote on every page, by all means do so. If the vote is meaningless because the sultanism of CWCki deigns it so, take it off the front page. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 16:09, 20 November 2010 (PST)
:I didn't come up with the poll idea - but I think it is the wrong way to really determine whether we switch or not. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 16:20, 20 November 2010 (PST)
::The poll results are certainly surprising to me so far. Perhaps Vector is the way to go after all. -- [[User:Mexican|Mexican]] 09:27, 21 November 2010 (PST)

Just make it an option in people's settings. IMO, Vector looks retarded. I'd perfer to keep it as it is. [[User:Smtp|Smtp]] 18:58, 21 November 2010 (PST)

When Vector was introduced in Wikipedia I hated it with a passion, especially for the position of the search box. Now I got used to it, and it does look a tad sleeker than MonoBook. Whatever the poll says. --[[User:ErsatzHouse|ErsatzHouse]] 04:41, 22 November 2010 (PST)

I agree with Smtp. Vector looks like a mess in comparison to Monobook. Also, yeah, just make it an option in the preferences or something. [[User:Der Zuschauer|Der Zuschauer]] 13:39, 22 November 2010 (PST)

It already is an option - but I think it would be better to have Vector be the default and people who really can't handle change can switch back to MonoBook. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 14:44, 22 November 2010 (PST)
:If its already an option, why are we polling about it or having discussion? Just set it and people that don't like it can just switch it and leave it at that. [[User:Smtp|Smtp]] 17:05, 22 November 2010 (PST)

Chris and death

2010-11-22T03:56:01Z

Smtp: /* BILLY MAYS (1958-2009) */ Oops, forgot to remove that too.

[[Image:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Rest in peace?]]
'''Death''' stalks [[Chris]] at every turn, and as a result he has a hard time understanding and/or coping with death, be it the death of a human or an [[Patti Chandler|animal]], or even a [[Simonla Rosechu|fictional character]].

His poor reactions to death most likely come from Chris's lack of empathy, and his incredibly underdeveloped mind. Kids often don't understand death until they're quite old, around 10-12 years; before that, they usually just think it's "like sleeping forever" or "just leaving." Chris, being a 3-year-old inside, can only resort to these clumsy analogies to sort of understand death; he even has a habit of appealing to dead people to "come back."<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands Or Buts#A history (6:02 to 9:34)]]: "Patti, I miss you. Come home."</ref><ref>[[:Image:SchuComic9P31.jpg]]: "Dedicated to Mr. Billy Mays II; Please Come Back Soon."</ref>

It could be that the only shows that Chris watched that dealt with death in any way had plot devices to facilitate the return of the departed. Chris, who is unable to connect cause with effect and considers behaviors from fiction to be interchangeable with reality, may simply assume that the dead can come back whenever they want.

Here are the departed souls, in order from earliest to latest:

==Deaths==
===The victims of the ''Titanic'' incident (d. 1912)===
In his [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|message to Lars]] in [[September 2010]], Chris belittled the lives of the men, women and children who died in the sinking of the RMS ''Titanic'' by constructing a boat out of Lego with several Lego men on it, one representing [[Lars]], pretending the ship sinks, then destroying the boat.

===Every single victim of the World Trade Center attacks (d. 2001)===
In the [[Twin Falling Towers]] video of 1 [[November 2009]], Chris makes fun of [[Clyde]] and says that he is as weak as the [[Wikipedia:World Trade Center|Twin Towers]]. He then shows the mouse cursor crashing into the buildings, complete with sound effects. This has shocked many, including somebody who lost a loved one in the attacks<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCDjrjr3b7M]</ref> and this could possibly be the lowest that Chris has ever gone.

===[[Patti Chandler]] (1988-2006)===
Patti was Chris's pet dog, and she died in June 2006. Chris [http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/User:AZT-13/Chris-chan_Emails_Part_IV apparently drew a picture of a crying Sonichu face] on the signature confirming the euthanasia process. As seen in the image used in this article, [[Patti-Chan|Patti also appeared in the comic, immortalized as an anthro]]. This is particularly disturbing in that Chris has apparently decided to deny his dog the afterlife that he presumably believes in, in favor of locking her in his own [[CWCville|personal hell]], in which she will only exist when he can be bothered to draw her. Effectively, he's stolen and erased her soul.

To Chris, her death is the greatest tragedy of his life, which he often compares to the deaths of other people's family members and loved ones. Not surprisingly, every single person he has said this to has become horribly offended, yet he continues to use this example.

Oddly enough, Patti may have been the only being Chris ever cared about. Supporting this is a report that Chris periodically broke down in tears for as many as six months after her death.{{cite}} By comparison, the "death" of any [[Troll|Sweetheart]] will result in a day of mourning, if she is lucky.

===RocketFox's Dad (1966-2008)===
RocketFox's Dad used to be an [[alcohol]]ic, but recovered and stayed sober for ten years. However, his liver failed and he passed away in mid-October 2008. When RocketFox asked Chris for advice on how to cope, Chris considered it an "accident" and went on a spiel about how bad alcohol was.<ref>[[IRC (16 October 2008)]]</ref> This is actually the first death during the [[troll]]ing, and it was mentioned to Chris to see how he would react to such news, and as mentioned, Chris did so poorly. [[Ryan]]'s death and Chris's reaction cemented this. About eight months later, Chris [[Chris's Big Night Out|became a huge hypocrite]]...

===[[Sarah Jackson]] (1981-2008)===
A former [[Sweetheart|heartsweet]] of Chris (and Decepticon) who was killed in a <s>car crash</s> carefully executed plan by [[Optimus Prime]]. SPOILERS: A [[troll]]. Sarah Jackson, like Patti, was used in his comic for a while as "Ms. Jackaras" in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]. Unlike Patti, Ms. Jackaras gets the same fate as her non-comic counterpart, and is replaced by her sister, who continues the lesson anyway. None of the ''Sonichu'' characters mourn the loss of their professor. Sound like [[Chris|someone]]?

===[[Ryan Cash]] (1996-2008)===
Ryan was [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]]'s brother who was a huge fan of [[Sonichu]]. After the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]] were delayed over and over, Ryan fell into a depression and committed suicide. [[Captain's Log, Stardate December 28th, 2008|Chris, of course, reacted to this in an inconsiderate manner, telling Clyde and his family to "just move on", and marveling at his power to incite suicide.]]

===[[PandaHalo]] (d. 2009?)===
Despite her being thousands of kilometers away from the bushfires, Chris assumed PandaHalo was dead. She is actually alive and kicking but Chris still doesn't know this. Two days after her "death," he went to find another [[sweetheart]] to [[Mass debating|mass debate]] to, saying "It's OK though, at least I have a [[Julie|good woman]] who's willing to be by my side at this point."<ref>[[Mumble 7#Summary]]</ref> This flagrant disrespect shouldn't surprise anyone because Chris is a self-centered asshole. This saga ''further'' proved that Chris has no sense of empathy or respect for the dead.

Nine months later, [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] featured a special "memorial" to PandaHalo and a sequence in which she dies (off-screen) in a building fire after saving her "Pokemon", [[Chloe Rosechu]] and [[Blazebob Sonichu]], so they wouldn't "burn with" her. Apparently, Chris didn't feel like he needed to honor the life of his beloved [[sweetheart]] and instead depicted her horrible, fiery death. He also has to mention that she "burned," which shows how he doesn't realize how painful and awful it would be to die in a fire. It's also not a term that anyone would use to describe the death of a loved one, providing more evidence of how little he actually cared about her. Because it took nine months to "honor" her death, he most likely decided he needed more god-awful characters for his shitty comic, was too lazy to create a new recolor and chose to use Chloe and Blazebob, thus reminding him of PandaHalo, who he had likely forgotten, and made him decide to feature a memorial to her.

More recently, Chris "dedicated" all of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] to PandaHalo's memory. This would be almost touching, if the alleged dedication didn't wholly consist of how awesome Chris was for using Panda's cover artwork. And then there's the issue of ''Sonichu'' #10 largely consisting of Chris murdering everybody he dislikes...

===[[Sarah May]]===
After being called "[[Julie]]" multiple times, Sarah May [[Troll|attempted suicide]] over [[Mumble 8|Mumble]]. Immediately after she went offline, rather than express any concern or try to find a way to stop her, Chris told [[Julie]] (who was also in the chat), "I still have you," with a completely emotionless "oh well" attitude. Julie was playing along with Chris, and did not react to Sarah's suicide attempt in any human-like fashion either; yet, it did not occur to Chris that Julie's behavior was ''in any way'' unnatural. Chris then made an [[CWC Shout Out to Sarah May|immature shout-out to her on a YouTube video]], with tears faker than all his [[sweetheart]]s combined. His reason for her to hold on? Because he'd be so sad without her. While mentioning the feelings of friends and families despair is typical in suicide prevention, Chris did it in such a selfish way, only thinking of how ''he'd'' feel, not how ''her'' family and friends would feel, that it was just full of [[fail]] and [[Chris and His Ego|narcissism]].

===[[Aunt Corrina]] (1936-2009)===
Chris's aunt Corrina had her funeral on Chris's birthday, which was also Shrove Tuesday, a Christian holiday that involves eating pancakes.<ref>[[wikipedia:Shrove Tuesday|Shrove Tuesday]]</ref> Needless to say, [[White knight#Chris cares only for himself|Chris cared more about the pancakes than the funeral of his own aunt]]. Patti was also obtained from her (see the e-mail link above).

When the "I know how to be sad because my dog died" excuse fails, Chris usually follows up with an offhand mention of his Aunt Corrina. If that fails the deaths of his many sweethearts tends to follow, although any normal human would bring those up first and the dog would be lucky to get a mention at all.

===[[Clyde Cash]] (1976-<s>2009</s>)===
In early [[2009]], Christian once seemed to be aware that Clyde Cash was supposedly dead, but cast a slight bit of doubt over the idea. Regardless, he [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursed]] Clyde in [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 18th, 2009]], just in case. He's back.

===[[BILLY MAYS]] (1958-2009)===
In the video [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009]], Chris only seems to be upset over people blaming him for MAYS's death, and loudly denies that he was ever the mayor of [[CWCville]]. He doesn't even offer his condolences to MAYS's family. Down the line, Chris selfishly adopts the idea that MAYS was in fact his bodyguard and he died protecting Chris. He goes even further by stating that he was also his identical body double and "without the beard we'd look the same". At least he's admitting that he's overweight.

In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], Chris slaps in a one-page intro with BILLY saying that he was never was the Mayor, but was part of Chris's group. At the bottom was a message from Chris, asking him to "come back soon."

===[[Ivy]] (1992-2009)===
Former [[troll|sweetheart]] Ivy committed suicide after not being allowed to see Chris. Chris uploaded the [[CWC "Boyfriend"]] video as a memorial. Yes, a poorly sung remake of Avril Lavigne's happy, bouncy pop/punk song, with lyrics changed to be about how much Chris would like women to date him. Unless the original was somehow Ivy's favorite song, this is just short of "Another One Bites the Dust" as one of the worst possible songs one can dedicate to a recently deceased loved one. Chris included pictures of several past sweethearts in the video, making it less of a tribute to Ivy and more of a monument to Chris's [[fail]].

Furthermore, as is unquestionably appropriate, Ivy's tragic demise was incorporated into [[Sonichu 9|issue 9]] of the comic. Rather than admit to having a hand in her suicide, Chris conjures up a magnificently gruesome accidental death, which involved having gotten her neck broken with elevator wires after falling through the elevator floor. Although this is a particularly troubling manipulation of what really happened, Chris more than makes up for it with gravitas; he gracefully, albeit belatedly, offers a tiny orange box in memory to Ivy 'O'Niel', taking pride of place underneath a backshot of [[Slaweel]] and some weird faux-[[Transformers]] actions. All of the above shows the leaps and bounds Chris has made in his appropriate handling of tragic deaths.

When confronted about this insanity in the [[Mailbag]], Chris got quite indignant, demanding to know what the questioner thought he should have done, since Ivy had died in real life and could no longer serve as Chris's [[GodJesus|God-given sweetheart]]. Why he felt the need to make her death in the series gruesomely similar to her real-life suicide is a question for the ages. It's not clear whether it had ever crossed Chris's mind to keep this horrific death out of the pages of what is supposedly a comic aimed at children, or to let Ivy's character live on in CWCville like he had done for [[Patti Chan]] and [[BILLY MAYS]].

===Mary Jo (d. 2009)===
In a [[Mailbag 27#Love and loss|mailbag]], Chris was asked by a troubled [[troll|fan]] what he should do after the death of his beloved Mary Jo.

{{quote|Mary Jo is gone (I feel for you), but you should move on and try to find another woman who will treat you about as good, or possibly better than, her. Suck it up, and move on like a Man would. I tell you as a Man who had to do the same thing a few times in the past too.| Chris, being super-sensitive.}}

Chris clearly states how he believes a death should be approached by a man (which includes finding another [[sweetheart|woman]] right away and a specific lack of grieving), and tells the traumatized fan that he should simply move onto a better woman since his girlfriend's death, not only being completely asinine, but also outlining that he believes women to be [[women's rights|replaceable and possibly interchangeable]].
[[Image:RIP mike.JPG|thumb|The obituary that Chris didn't even bother to read.]]

===Mike Jackson (1969-2010)===

Throughout [[January 2010]], a man named Mike Jackson sent Chris a series of friendly letters [[Mailbag 31#If your kids are 16 or 17, you should watch porn with them|asking]] [[Mailbag 35#In which Chris advises a father to buy his son whores|for]] [[Mailbag 39#In which Chris refers to a man buying his underage son a whore as "good news"|advice]], and then [[Mailbag 45#Adventures with whores|begging]] for [[Mailbag 48#This guy's life is in shambles, but Chris was STRESSED!|help]] after Chris's amazingly bad advice completely ruined his life. Chris, caring soul that he is, promised the absolute minimum amount of effort (a [[YouTube]] video) and then never made good on his word.

Distraught over Chris's total lack of action, and terrified at the risk of having his family torn to pieces, Mike [[Mailbag 52#This, if anything, requires a canned response|died from a sleeping pill overdose]]. Mike's grieving widow generously decided to let Chris view the private obituary page set up for friends and family of the deceased, saying that Mike would have wanted her to treat Chris with respect and decency.

Chris responded to the news of Mike's death with the same copy-pasted bullshit he used to pretend he was listening to criticism. The two infamous sentences made no sense in context and demonstrated beyond the shadow of a doubt that Chris could not care less about Mike's tragic death. It was revealed in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]] that Chris didn't even view Mike's obituary page, and his [[Mailbag 56#In which Chris isn't sorry at all|response]] to Mike's grieving son was all of three words long.

The Mike Jackson "mini-saga" might be the most conclusive proof yet that Chris doesn't understand the consequences of his terrible advice, or the gravity of the tragedy he caused.

===Simonla Rosechu===
[[Image:SandyRosechu.jpg|80px|right|thumb|The bastard child in question.]]
During the [[Asperchu]] saga, a recurring theme was [[Evan]]'s legal claims in regard to [[Simonla]] as a derivative of his character, [[Simonchu]]. While early demands were for Chris to edit his old strips to remove Simonla entirely from continuity, later Evan consented to letting Chris keep Simonla's early appearances, on the grounds that he kill her at a later date. Chris, not surprisingly, totally lost his shit, showing a much stronger emotional attachment to an empty, one-dimensional fictional character than he has managed for any living creature other than his [[Patti Chandler|fucking dog]]. Finally, after being faced with severe legal action, Chris finally killed Simonla in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], though not before she laid an egg out of wedlock with her baby-daddy [[Wild]] (though, of course, the act of laying the egg was never shown, or even mentioned), which hatched into [[Sandy Rosechu]].

It should be noted that, as revealed in the [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls]], Chris considers cartoon characters to be real. Not figuratively, not essentially: ''literally'' real, living creatures that exist in some other world reminiscent of Toon Town from ''[[Wikipedia:Who Framed Roger Rabbit|Who Framed Roger Rabbit]]''. Simonla's death was as real to him as that of any of his family members or sweethearts... perhaps even more so.

===Yeardley Love (1987-2010)===
Yeardley Love was a lacrosse player for [[UVA]] who was murdered. Chris uploaded a [[05142010|video]] discussing the story (which he probably just saw on TV for a few minutes), but didn't even bother to say her name. He also stated that the murderer should get 20 years in prison for the shock of the murder, which is twice his desired punishment for smoking. Later in the video, [[Chris and His Ego|he rerouted the subject towards himself]] and stated how everyone needed to be sympathetic of him and his autism and that he's [[Chris and anger|not]] [[Chris and race|a]] [[Chris and sex|bad]] [[Chris and rape|man]]. In other words, he used the death of a girl he never knew or really cared about in order to make himself look good.

===[[Bob|Bob Chandler]] and [[Barbara Chandler]]===
[[File:Ctrl-alt-chrischan.jpg|thumb|He remembered his [[PSP]].]]
Coming soon... both are well into their "Silver Years" and suffering from many health issues, compounded by their age. It doesn't help that they're [[Tour of Chris's House|living in a landfill]].

On 1 [[March 2010]], Bob was sent to the hospital with congestive heart failure, owing to his age, [[Burger King|diet]] and lifestyle. In the [[Twitter|Tweet]] announcing Bob's heart failure, Chris stated that he believed his father would survive, and showed more concern for the [[stress]] he was under than his own father's health. On top of that, during the [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|date with Emily]], Bob stated that he already died (probably for a minute or two and then was brought back, or his heart had to be stopped during surgery). Bob has had four prior heart attacks and "Eat at Burger King" is still a part of his daily routine. His inevitable death (and probably one more heart attack) is likely to occur sometime within the next few <s>years</s> months.

===Chris himself===
Given Chris's terrible diet, poor [[health]], [[obesity]], lack of exercise and general lack of concern for anything, he is unlikely to live far into his forties. However, he may be genetically disposed to live a long — albeit, [[100 2178|miserable]] — life: [[Bob]] has lived into his eighties despite being a heavy drinker, and other male relatives have lived past 90 (the average American man dies at 75 or 76).

Naturally, the death of Chris himself is the only death that immediately concerns Chris. And unsurprisingly, he is only worried about his death because it would put a stop to the Love Quest once and for all. Chris's fear of death is probably an extension of his fear of [[F Abstinance|reaching old age before getting laid]], as opposed to the fear of death exhibited by normal people. Chris also apparently has a recurring nightmare where he finds himself "going into the light." It is unknown when he began to have this nightmare, but it is likely one of the "bad dreams" Chris claimed that Ivy helped stop. It has probably been going on for years and will most likely continue until the day it comes true.

==See also==
*[[Autism]]
*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Lack of empathy]]
*[[Death threats]]

==References==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Dead]]

Chris and death

2010-11-22T03:55:15Z

Smtp: /* BILLY MAYS (1958-2009) */ I thought we had already figured out that, that wasnt the intention of what was wrote on that page. Just chris' poor choice of wording...

[[Image:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Rest in peace?]]
'''Death''' stalks [[Chris]] at every turn, and as a result he has a hard time understanding and/or coping with death, be it the death of a human or an [[Patti Chandler|animal]], or even a [[Simonla Rosechu|fictional character]].

His poor reactions to death most likely come from Chris's lack of empathy, and his incredibly underdeveloped mind. Kids often don't understand death until they're quite old, around 10-12 years; before that, they usually just think it's "like sleeping forever" or "just leaving." Chris, being a 3-year-old inside, can only resort to these clumsy analogies to sort of understand death; he even has a habit of appealing to dead people to "come back."<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands Or Buts#A history (6:02 to 9:34)]]: "Patti, I miss you. Come home."</ref><ref>[[:Image:SchuComic9P31.jpg]]: "Dedicated to Mr. Billy Mays II; Please Come Back Soon."</ref>

It could be that the only shows that Chris watched that dealt with death in any way had plot devices to facilitate the return of the departed. Chris, who is unable to connect cause with effect and considers behaviors from fiction to be interchangeable with reality, may simply assume that the dead can come back whenever they want.

Here are the departed souls, in order from earliest to latest:

==Deaths==
===The victims of the ''Titanic'' incident (d. 1912)===
In his [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|message to Lars]] in [[September 2010]], Chris belittled the lives of the men, women and children who died in the sinking of the RMS ''Titanic'' by constructing a boat out of Lego with several Lego men on it, one representing [[Lars]], pretending the ship sinks, then destroying the boat.

===Every single victim of the World Trade Center attacks (d. 2001)===
In the [[Twin Falling Towers]] video of 1 [[November 2009]], Chris makes fun of [[Clyde]] and says that he is as weak as the [[Wikipedia:World Trade Center|Twin Towers]]. He then shows the mouse cursor crashing into the buildings, complete with sound effects. This has shocked many, including somebody who lost a loved one in the attacks<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCDjrjr3b7M]</ref> and this could possibly be the lowest that Chris has ever gone.

===[[Patti Chandler]] (1988-2006)===
Patti was Chris's pet dog, and she died in June 2006. Chris [http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/User:AZT-13/Chris-chan_Emails_Part_IV apparently drew a picture of a crying Sonichu face] on the signature confirming the euthanasia process. As seen in the image used in this article, [[Patti-Chan|Patti also appeared in the comic, immortalized as an anthro]]. This is particularly disturbing in that Chris has apparently decided to deny his dog the afterlife that he presumably believes in, in favor of locking her in his own [[CWCville|personal hell]], in which she will only exist when he can be bothered to draw her. Effectively, he's stolen and erased her soul.

To Chris, her death is the greatest tragedy of his life, which he often compares to the deaths of other people's family members and loved ones. Not surprisingly, every single person he has said this to has become horribly offended, yet he continues to use this example.

Oddly enough, Patti may have been the only being Chris ever cared about. Supporting this is a report that Chris periodically broke down in tears for as many as six months after her death.{{cite}} By comparison, the "death" of any [[Troll|Sweetheart]] will result in a day of mourning, if she is lucky.

===RocketFox's Dad (1966-2008)===
RocketFox's Dad used to be an [[alcohol]]ic, but recovered and stayed sober for ten years. However, his liver failed and he passed away in mid-October 2008. When RocketFox asked Chris for advice on how to cope, Chris considered it an "accident" and went on a spiel about how bad alcohol was.<ref>[[IRC (16 October 2008)]]</ref> This is actually the first death during the [[troll]]ing, and it was mentioned to Chris to see how he would react to such news, and as mentioned, Chris did so poorly. [[Ryan]]'s death and Chris's reaction cemented this. About eight months later, Chris [[Chris's Big Night Out|became a huge hypocrite]]...

===[[Sarah Jackson]] (1981-2008)===
A former [[Sweetheart|heartsweet]] of Chris (and Decepticon) who was killed in a <s>car crash</s> carefully executed plan by [[Optimus Prime]]. SPOILERS: A [[troll]]. Sarah Jackson, like Patti, was used in his comic for a while as "Ms. Jackaras" in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]. Unlike Patti, Ms. Jackaras gets the same fate as her non-comic counterpart, and is replaced by her sister, who continues the lesson anyway. None of the ''Sonichu'' characters mourn the loss of their professor. Sound like [[Chris|someone]]?

===[[Ryan Cash]] (1996-2008)===
Ryan was [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]]'s brother who was a huge fan of [[Sonichu]]. After the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]] were delayed over and over, Ryan fell into a depression and committed suicide. [[Captain's Log, Stardate December 28th, 2008|Chris, of course, reacted to this in an inconsiderate manner, telling Clyde and his family to "just move on", and marveling at his power to incite suicide.]]

===[[PandaHalo]] (d. 2009?)===
Despite her being thousands of kilometers away from the bushfires, Chris assumed PandaHalo was dead. She is actually alive and kicking but Chris still doesn't know this. Two days after her "death," he went to find another [[sweetheart]] to [[Mass debating|mass debate]] to, saying "It's OK though, at least I have a [[Julie|good woman]] who's willing to be by my side at this point."<ref>[[Mumble 7#Summary]]</ref> This flagrant disrespect shouldn't surprise anyone because Chris is a self-centered asshole. This saga ''further'' proved that Chris has no sense of empathy or respect for the dead.

Nine months later, [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] featured a special "memorial" to PandaHalo and a sequence in which she dies (off-screen) in a building fire after saving her "Pokemon", [[Chloe Rosechu]] and [[Blazebob Sonichu]], so they wouldn't "burn with" her. Apparently, Chris didn't feel like he needed to honor the life of his beloved [[sweetheart]] and instead depicted her horrible, fiery death. He also has to mention that she "burned," which shows how he doesn't realize how painful and awful it would be to die in a fire. It's also not a term that anyone would use to describe the death of a loved one, providing more evidence of how little he actually cared about her. Because it took nine months to "honor" her death, he most likely decided he needed more god-awful characters for his shitty comic, was too lazy to create a new recolor and chose to use Chloe and Blazebob, thus reminding him of PandaHalo, who he had likely forgotten, and made him decide to feature a memorial to her.

More recently, Chris "dedicated" all of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] to PandaHalo's memory. This would be almost touching, if the alleged dedication didn't wholly consist of how awesome Chris was for using Panda's cover artwork. And then there's the issue of ''Sonichu'' #10 largely consisting of Chris murdering everybody he dislikes...

===[[Sarah May]]===
After being called "[[Julie]]" multiple times, Sarah May [[Troll|attempted suicide]] over [[Mumble 8|Mumble]]. Immediately after she went offline, rather than express any concern or try to find a way to stop her, Chris told [[Julie]] (who was also in the chat), "I still have you," with a completely emotionless "oh well" attitude. Julie was playing along with Chris, and did not react to Sarah's suicide attempt in any human-like fashion either; yet, it did not occur to Chris that Julie's behavior was ''in any way'' unnatural. Chris then made an [[CWC Shout Out to Sarah May|immature shout-out to her on a YouTube video]], with tears faker than all his [[sweetheart]]s combined. His reason for her to hold on? Because he'd be so sad without her. While mentioning the feelings of friends and families despair is typical in suicide prevention, Chris did it in such a selfish way, only thinking of how ''he'd'' feel, not how ''her'' family and friends would feel, that it was just full of [[fail]] and [[Chris and His Ego|narcissism]].

===[[Aunt Corrina]] (1936-2009)===
Chris's aunt Corrina had her funeral on Chris's birthday, which was also Shrove Tuesday, a Christian holiday that involves eating pancakes.<ref>[[wikipedia:Shrove Tuesday|Shrove Tuesday]]</ref> Needless to say, [[White knight#Chris cares only for himself|Chris cared more about the pancakes than the funeral of his own aunt]]. Patti was also obtained from her (see the e-mail link above).

When the "I know how to be sad because my dog died" excuse fails, Chris usually follows up with an offhand mention of his Aunt Corrina. If that fails the deaths of his many sweethearts tends to follow, although any normal human would bring those up first and the dog would be lucky to get a mention at all.

===[[Clyde Cash]] (1976-<s>2009</s>)===
In early [[2009]], Christian once seemed to be aware that Clyde Cash was supposedly dead, but cast a slight bit of doubt over the idea. Regardless, he [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursed]] Clyde in [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 18th, 2009]], just in case. He's back.

===[[BILLY MAYS]] (1958-2009)===
In the video [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009]], Chris only seems to be upset over people blaming him for MAYS's death, and loudly denies that he was ever the mayor of [[CWCville]]. He doesn't even offer his condolences to MAYS's family. Down the line, Chris selfishly adopts the idea that MAYS was in fact his bodyguard and he died protecting Chris. He goes even further by stating that he was also his identical body double and "without the beard we'd look the same". At least he's admitting that he's overweight.

In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], Chris slaps in a one-page intro with BILLY saying that he was never was the Mayor, but was part of Chris's group. At the bottom was a message from Chris, asking him to "come back soon." The next issue, however, had him appear alive and well, trapped like [[Patti-Chan]] in his own personal Hell of [[CWCville]].

===[[Ivy]] (1992-2009)===
Former [[troll|sweetheart]] Ivy committed suicide after not being allowed to see Chris. Chris uploaded the [[CWC "Boyfriend"]] video as a memorial. Yes, a poorly sung remake of Avril Lavigne's happy, bouncy pop/punk song, with lyrics changed to be about how much Chris would like women to date him. Unless the original was somehow Ivy's favorite song, this is just short of "Another One Bites the Dust" as one of the worst possible songs one can dedicate to a recently deceased loved one. Chris included pictures of several past sweethearts in the video, making it less of a tribute to Ivy and more of a monument to Chris's [[fail]].

Furthermore, as is unquestionably appropriate, Ivy's tragic demise was incorporated into [[Sonichu 9|issue 9]] of the comic. Rather than admit to having a hand in her suicide, Chris conjures up a magnificently gruesome accidental death, which involved having gotten her neck broken with elevator wires after falling through the elevator floor. Although this is a particularly troubling manipulation of what really happened, Chris more than makes up for it with gravitas; he gracefully, albeit belatedly, offers a tiny orange box in memory to Ivy 'O'Niel', taking pride of place underneath a backshot of [[Slaweel]] and some weird faux-[[Transformers]] actions. All of the above shows the leaps and bounds Chris has made in his appropriate handling of tragic deaths.

When confronted about this insanity in the [[Mailbag]], Chris got quite indignant, demanding to know what the questioner thought he should have done, since Ivy had died in real life and could no longer serve as Chris's [[GodJesus|God-given sweetheart]]. Why he felt the need to make her death in the series gruesomely similar to her real-life suicide is a question for the ages. It's not clear whether it had ever crossed Chris's mind to keep this horrific death out of the pages of what is supposedly a comic aimed at children, or to let Ivy's character live on in CWCville like he had done for [[Patti Chan]] and [[BILLY MAYS]].

===Mary Jo (d. 2009)===
In a [[Mailbag 27#Love and loss|mailbag]], Chris was asked by a troubled [[troll|fan]] what he should do after the death of his beloved Mary Jo.

{{quote|Mary Jo is gone (I feel for you), but you should move on and try to find another woman who will treat you about as good, or possibly better than, her. Suck it up, and move on like a Man would. I tell you as a Man who had to do the same thing a few times in the past too.| Chris, being super-sensitive.}}

Chris clearly states how he believes a death should be approached by a man (which includes finding another [[sweetheart|woman]] right away and a specific lack of grieving), and tells the traumatized fan that he should simply move onto a better woman since his girlfriend's death, not only being completely asinine, but also outlining that he believes women to be [[women's rights|replaceable and possibly interchangeable]].
[[Image:RIP mike.JPG|thumb|The obituary that Chris didn't even bother to read.]]

===Mike Jackson (1969-2010)===

Throughout [[January 2010]], a man named Mike Jackson sent Chris a series of friendly letters [[Mailbag 31#If your kids are 16 or 17, you should watch porn with them|asking]] [[Mailbag 35#In which Chris advises a father to buy his son whores|for]] [[Mailbag 39#In which Chris refers to a man buying his underage son a whore as "good news"|advice]], and then [[Mailbag 45#Adventures with whores|begging]] for [[Mailbag 48#This guy's life is in shambles, but Chris was STRESSED!|help]] after Chris's amazingly bad advice completely ruined his life. Chris, caring soul that he is, promised the absolute minimum amount of effort (a [[YouTube]] video) and then never made good on his word.

Distraught over Chris's total lack of action, and terrified at the risk of having his family torn to pieces, Mike [[Mailbag 52#This, if anything, requires a canned response|died from a sleeping pill overdose]]. Mike's grieving widow generously decided to let Chris view the private obituary page set up for friends and family of the deceased, saying that Mike would have wanted her to treat Chris with respect and decency.

Chris responded to the news of Mike's death with the same copy-pasted bullshit he used to pretend he was listening to criticism. The two infamous sentences made no sense in context and demonstrated beyond the shadow of a doubt that Chris could not care less about Mike's tragic death. It was revealed in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]] that Chris didn't even view Mike's obituary page, and his [[Mailbag 56#In which Chris isn't sorry at all|response]] to Mike's grieving son was all of three words long.

The Mike Jackson "mini-saga" might be the most conclusive proof yet that Chris doesn't understand the consequences of his terrible advice, or the gravity of the tragedy he caused.

===Simonla Rosechu===
[[Image:SandyRosechu.jpg|80px|right|thumb|The bastard child in question.]]
During the [[Asperchu]] saga, a recurring theme was [[Evan]]'s legal claims in regard to [[Simonla]] as a derivative of his character, [[Simonchu]]. While early demands were for Chris to edit his old strips to remove Simonla entirely from continuity, later Evan consented to letting Chris keep Simonla's early appearances, on the grounds that he kill her at a later date. Chris, not surprisingly, totally lost his shit, showing a much stronger emotional attachment to an empty, one-dimensional fictional character than he has managed for any living creature other than his [[Patti Chandler|fucking dog]]. Finally, after being faced with severe legal action, Chris finally killed Simonla in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], though not before she laid an egg out of wedlock with her baby-daddy [[Wild]] (though, of course, the act of laying the egg was never shown, or even mentioned), which hatched into [[Sandy Rosechu]].

It should be noted that, as revealed in the [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls]], Chris considers cartoon characters to be real. Not figuratively, not essentially: ''literally'' real, living creatures that exist in some other world reminiscent of Toon Town from ''[[Wikipedia:Who Framed Roger Rabbit|Who Framed Roger Rabbit]]''. Simonla's death was as real to him as that of any of his family members or sweethearts... perhaps even more so.

===Yeardley Love (1987-2010)===
Yeardley Love was a lacrosse player for [[UVA]] who was murdered. Chris uploaded a [[05142010|video]] discussing the story (which he probably just saw on TV for a few minutes), but didn't even bother to say her name. He also stated that the murderer should get 20 years in prison for the shock of the murder, which is twice his desired punishment for smoking. Later in the video, [[Chris and His Ego|he rerouted the subject towards himself]] and stated how everyone needed to be sympathetic of him and his autism and that he's [[Chris and anger|not]] [[Chris and race|a]] [[Chris and sex|bad]] [[Chris and rape|man]]. In other words, he used the death of a girl he never knew or really cared about in order to make himself look good.

===[[Bob|Bob Chandler]] and [[Barbara Chandler]]===
[[File:Ctrl-alt-chrischan.jpg|thumb|He remembered his [[PSP]].]]
Coming soon... both are well into their "Silver Years" and suffering from many health issues, compounded by their age. It doesn't help that they're [[Tour of Chris's House|living in a landfill]].

On 1 [[March 2010]], Bob was sent to the hospital with congestive heart failure, owing to his age, [[Burger King|diet]] and lifestyle. In the [[Twitter|Tweet]] announcing Bob's heart failure, Chris stated that he believed his father would survive, and showed more concern for the [[stress]] he was under than his own father's health. On top of that, during the [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|date with Emily]], Bob stated that he already died (probably for a minute or two and then was brought back, or his heart had to be stopped during surgery). Bob has had four prior heart attacks and "Eat at Burger King" is still a part of his daily routine. His inevitable death (and probably one more heart attack) is likely to occur sometime within the next few <s>years</s> months.

===Chris himself===
Given Chris's terrible diet, poor [[health]], [[obesity]], lack of exercise and general lack of concern for anything, he is unlikely to live far into his forties. However, he may be genetically disposed to live a long — albeit, [[100 2178|miserable]] — life: [[Bob]] has lived into his eighties despite being a heavy drinker, and other male relatives have lived past 90 (the average American man dies at 75 or 76).

Naturally, the death of Chris himself is the only death that immediately concerns Chris. And unsurprisingly, he is only worried about his death because it would put a stop to the Love Quest once and for all. Chris's fear of death is probably an extension of his fear of [[F Abstinance|reaching old age before getting laid]], as opposed to the fear of death exhibited by normal people. Chris also apparently has a recurring nightmare where he finds himself "going into the light." It is unknown when he began to have this nightmare, but it is likely one of the "bad dreams" Chris claimed that Ivy helped stop. It has probably been going on for years and will most likely continue until the day it comes true.

==See also==
*[[Autism]]
*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Lack of empathy]]
*[[Death threats]]

==References==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Dead]]

CWCki:Technical

2010-11-22T02:58:02Z

Smtp: /* Default Skin */

Pokémon

2010-11-11T01:04:17Z

Smtp: /* Scyther */ -fail link...

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[Image:Satoshi tajiri.jpg|thumb|[[Aspergers|Aspie]] creator of the series, Satoshi Tajiri. Unlike Chris, he actually did something with his life.]]

'''''Pokémon''''' (or Pok'emon, according to Chris) is one of [[Nintendo]]'s greatest creations, a Japanese cultural phenomenon that is beloved by children around the world, and a billion dollar multimedia franchise encompassing [[video games]], [[card games]], toys, an [[anime]] series, and much, much more.

Yet it only took [[Christian Weston Chandler|one autistic manchild]] to forever ruin it for an entire generation.

==Chris-chan in the Pokémon world==
Chris, according to the "[[Sonichu]]" article on the [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu CWCipedia], sees himself as an official Pokémon gym leader. He claims to have over 387 Pokémon leveled-up to level 100 on his ''Pokémon Diamond'' game, all of them being trained without any kind of cheating or Rare Candies. It's not certain whether this is truth or more of his [[autistic]] imagination. However, given the fact he owns [[List of Chris's games|every Pokémon game]] and game system, has no life at all, and has paid off several mortgages in [[Animal Crossing]], it may very well be true. Who knows? All it takes is a load of time, and Lord knows Chris's [[Mass debating|time isn't going to anything good]].

It should be noted that the Generation IV games such as ''Diamond'', ''Pearl'', ''Platinum'', ''HeartGold'' and ''SoulSilver'' feature 493 Pokémon, something that should be common knowledge to anyone claiming to have achieved what Chris has, making his "collection" far from complete.

To make matters worse, the newly-released fifth generation games, ''[[Niggos|Black]]'' and ''[[Semen|White]]'', will introduce 156 more.

As the leader of the [[CWCville]] Pokémon Gym, Chris has a fairly unimaginative team:
:* [[Sonichu]], a [[Parody|Recolor]]
:* [[Anime|Inuyasha]], a [[Wikipedia:Blaziken|Blaziken]]
:* [[Gregg Mays|Greg]], a [[Wikipedia:Swampert|Swampert]]
:* [[Chris and his Ego|Christina]], a [[Wikipedia:Sceptile|Sceptile]]
:* [[Vanessa Hudgens|Vanessa]], a [[Wikipedia:Gardevoir|Gardevoir]] (who many people seem to have a fetish for, [[Chris and sex|possibly including Chris]]...)
:* [[Random-access humor|Bagoner]], a [[Wikipedia:Salamence|Salamence]]

==Pokémon characters appearing in ''Sonichu'' comics==

===[[Wikipedia:Pikachu|Pikachu]]===

Transformed into [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]. Despite the importance to ''Sonichu'' lore, this is basically the only time a Pikachu appears or is mentioned in the comic. From this point on, it's all just shitty recolors of Chris's first shitty recolor.

===[[Wikipedia:Raichu|Raichu]]===

Transformed into [[Rosechu]] by the [[Rainbow]], in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]].

===[[Wikipedia:Dragonite|David the Dragonite/Daisy the Dragonite]]===

A Dragonite Kel also owned. The considerate Pokémon trainer offered his [[Duck|sexual services]] to [[Rosechu]] when the latter was [[Masturbating and squirtin'|in heat]], noting that he's "[[Honest|loyal]]". Rosechu refused, stating that David is "[[Obesity|just too big]]" even for her loose, gaping [[China]], and suggesting Kel [[Patti-Chan|have sex with him herself]]. Kel enigmatically answers that "she can't say she didn't try". Did they or didn't they? History will [[Chris and writing#Kudzu plot|never know]].

Strangely enough, David may have been [[retcon]]ned into "Daisy the Dragonite", as indicated by a listing of Kel's Pokémon on [[CWCipedia]]. David, who appeared in [[Issue 0]] (Episodes 2 and 3), is not mentioned on the list, though Daisy is and is the only Dragonite on the list. It would not be out of the question to think that Chris simply forgot about David's importance to the canon and retconned him into a girl, especially probable due to the fact that both names begin with the same letter and Chris couldn't really name a girl "Davidina", plus the fact that he has created [[Simonla|gender-benders]] before. This would indicate that Kel, in fact, offered "Daisy" to Rosechu for a [[lesbian]] relationship, which in turn calls into question the sexuality of Rosechu, Kel, and the Dragonite, and makes several aspects of the comic a great deal more confusing.

===[[Wikipedia:Zapdos|Zapdos]]===
[[Image:Zapdos.jpg|thumb|Zapdos is not amused with Chris's faggotry.]]
An electric type [[Pokémon]] and one of the three legendary birds. Zapdos was used by [[Naitsirhc]] to capture [[Rosechu]] and battle [[Sonichu]] in CWCville Mall. Although Sonichu was victorious, Naitsirhc obtained a sample of Sonichu's [[Semen|DNA]], which he would later use in the creation of [[Black Sonichu]].

===[[Wikipedia:Raikou|Raikou]]===

Used by Naitsirhc as a getaway ride in the same episode.

===[[Wikipedia:Scyther|Scyther]]===
[[File:Scyther.jpg|thumb|200px|right|The Scyther who fathered Wild Sonichu. [[Chris and art|We think]].]]
For no obvious reason, a male Scyther assumed the role of [[Wild Sonichu]]'s father. Whether this is because it was screwing his Venusaur mother, or felt some obligation to help her raise Wild is unclear. The Scyther trained Wild in using his "Razor Leaf" attacks to cut down trees and such. It should be noted that Scyther cannot actually learn the move Razor Leaf in the video games.

In [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], Wild would tell Sonichu and Rosechu of the last time he saw his adoptive father. According to Wild, his father was the leader of the "cut-sharp" clan of "Scyther and Scizor". At some point, the "Charmeleon Cult" burned down the dojo in the jungle that served as their headquarters. Wild joined his father on a mission to take [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|revenge]], but the Scyther was intercepted and captured by poachers instead. Wild cried like a bitch while the poachers loaded his dad in their van, then finally attempted to use his super powers to free him. The Scyther told him to stop, however, since he knew Wild was too much of a [[fail|failure]] to cut through the steel frame of the van. Wild's last memory of his father was of "the passing-of-the-torch look in his eyes".

===[[Wikipedia:Venusaur|Venusaur]]===
[[File:Venusaur.jpg|thumb|200px|left|She has to put up with his retardation.]]
A female Venusaur in the jungle discovered [[Wild Sonichu]]'s egg and adopted him. As Wild inexplicably has retractable tentacles in his arms, the Venusaur trained him in using them to grasp objects. On the other hand, she may have rightly tried to drop a coconut on his head.

===[[Wikipedia:Swampert|Swampert]]===

A female Swampert adopted [[Bubbles Rosechu]] upon discovering her egg on the beach. Unlike Wild's parents, the Swampert doesn't seem to have taught Bubbles much of anything, as the pair spent her childhood splashing in the water like idiots. This idyllic existence was brought to an end when a Wailord dropped a giant boulder on the Swampert for no apparent reason. Unable to rescue her mother in her immature Rosey body, Bubbles evolved into her Rosechu form, and somehow used an ice beam to save the Swampert from drowning (the fact that Swampert is an aquatic creature and therefore cannot drown notwithstanding).

While Bubbles continues to live on the beach, the Swampert has not been seen since her first appearance. This would suggest that at some point, the Wailord returned to finish the job.

=== [[Wikipedia:Wailord|Boulder-Dropping Whale]] ===
[[Image:Boulder_Whale.jpg|160px|thumb|left|The Boulder Dropping Whale's lone appearance in the comic.]]
As the name suggests, Boulder-Dropping Whale is a creature resembling a whale, who literally dropped a boulder. This signature attack was used against the Swampert who raised [[Bubbles Rosechu]], and would have drowned the Swampert if not for Bubbles's timely intervention. Although never named in the comic, the whale's anonymity and murderous hatred for ''Sonichu'' characters has earned him a cult following among [[trolls|fans]], who have dubbed him "Boulder-Dropping Whale", or "BDW" for short.

Originally identified as a common whale in the [[Audiobooks]], Chris stated in [[CWC Blog#12 January 2010|a blog in January 2010]] that it is a Wailord, a [[Pokémon]] that closely resembles a whale. This makes sense, as Chris always uses Pokémon when drawing background fauna in his comics (probably because he didn't pay attention during any of his biology classes in high school), such as the underwater scene in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] which featured only Pokémon sea creatures, and no naturally occurring wildlife. Further, BDW's trademark attack appears to resemble "Rock Tomb", an attack available to many Pokémon in the video games, including Wailord.

Nevertheless, the name "Boulder-Dropping Whale" has stuck, and no matter what his species, he remains a [[troll|fan]] favorite.

Chris also stated in the same blog that Boulder-Dropping Whale had been captured, and was currently being forced to fight the senseless battles of some random Pokémon trainer. The fans have disregarded this statement, standing firm in their belief that Boulder Dropping Whale currently resides on the moon with his [[Moon-Pals]] '''Bill''', '''Metal Sonichu''', and '''[[Yawning Squirtle]]''', getting high as fuck.

=== [[Wikipedia:Mewtwo|Mewtwo]]===
[[Image:Mewtwo.JPG|thumb|right|Mewtwo is not pleased with Chris.]]
A powerful, reclusive Pokémon genetically engineered from the DNA of the rare Mew, Mewtwo escaped from his creators and briefly plotted to conquer the world in the first Pokémon feature film. Mewtwo's dark, brooding nature and vast psychic abilities would serve as Chris's "inspiration" for [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]], whose egg hatched in the same cave Mewtwo lived in during the movie. As if the connection weren't blatant enough, Chris established that Mewtwo served as Magi-Chan's mentor, contacting him at birth via telepathy and teaching him to use his mental powers. Aside from his mental rapport with Mewtwo, Magi-Chan grew up completely isolated from the rest of the world. In a half-assed attempt to introduce him to civilization, Mewtwo projected memories of Jackie Chan films, other people's birthday parties, and various tourist attractions. Two weeks after Magi-Chan evolved into his Sonichu form, Mewtwo sent him out into the world, promising that they would one day meet face-to-face. As Chris has probably forgotten all about this, though, it'll probably never happen.

Christian has also notably claimed on the [[CWCipedia]] once that Reldnahc had a Mewtwo in his Pokemon team. It can be assumed that this is the same one.
{{clear}}

=== [[Wikipedia:Snorlax|Snorlax]]===
[[File:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|A wild [[Barb|Snorlax]] in repose]]
A Snorlax briefly appeared in Christian's 'Backyard Safari' [[Sub-Episode]], a documentary about [[Jerkops]] designed specifically to insult them. He comments at one point that a [[Jerkhief]] weighs [[Obesity|over 1500 pounds]] and can be identified by its [[The Creepy Stare|glassy eyes]] and wooden badge. [[Chris and hypocrisy|How ironic for Chris to be saying such things about Jerkops]].

The Snorlax appears at the bottom of the page as an illustration, since Christian had commented in a paragraph that the Jerkhief was heavier than a Snorlax.

===[[Wikipedia:Jigglypuff|Jigglypuff]]===
Served as inspiration for [[Jiggliami]], an "original" character created by [[Blanca]]. Appeared in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] and [[Sonichu 8|#8]].

===[[Yawning Squirtle|Squirtle]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Mudkip|Mudkip]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Seadra|Seadra]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Goldeen|Goldeen]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Staryu|Staryu]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Corsola|Corsola]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Octillery|Octillery]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Mantine|Mantine]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Corphish|Corphish]]===
Appeared in the underwater scene on page 59 of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

===[[Wikipedia:Flaaffy|Flaaffy]]===
Appears as [[Layla Flaaffy]] in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]].

===[[Wikipedia:Sneasel|Sneasel]]===
Appears as [[Reginald Sneasel]] in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]].

===[[Wikipedia:Nidoking|Nidoking]]===
Used by Naitsirhc to battle [[Bionic]] in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]].

===[[Wikipedia:Voltorb|Voltorb]]===
Used by Alec Benson Leary to murder [[Simonla Rosechu]] via Explosion in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

==Plagiarism in ''Sonichu''==

Despite the fact that Chris primarily uses Pokémon in his series, not only is he not above using the characters, he's also not above using various ''ideas'' from the series. Amongst those include:

*In [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]], [[Flame the Sunbird]] says that he "could use some pants". This is ripped off from ''[[Wikipedia:Pokémon: The Movie 2000|Pokémon: The Movie 2000]]'' when the Pokémon Slowking, freezing due to the weather changes, wishes for a pair to keep himself warm.
*Despite "not being a Pokémon," Flame uses Pokémon attacks in his one notable appearance. Speculation abounds, but it could be that Chris assumes that "Pokémon rules" apply to all intelligent mystical animals the way anyone with a guitar can pull off solo specials from [[Brutal Legend]].
*In [[Sonichu Special 4]], [[Kacey]]'s sister resembles Candice, one of the 4th Generation Gym Leaders.
*In the biography for [[Rosechu]], it is mentioned that [[Kel]] ended up getting the Pichu who'd become Rosechu because she missed out on getting Bulbasaur, Charmander and Squirtle. This is a ripoff of how Ash Ketchum got Pikachu, except for the fact that Ash and Pikachu didn't hit it off until Pikachu saw how far Ash would go to protect it.
*In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], Sonichu inexplicably knows Iron Tail, a Steel-type attack, for use on the Rock/Ground Type Liquid (Steel is super-effective against Rock). This is stolen, again, from Pikachu, who learned the same move so the writers could let Ash battle Roxanne (and other Rock types) without breaking the rules of the game and pissing off fans. The difference is that leading up to the battle, an episode was spent to show Pikachu learning the move. It is to be noted that in the video games, Pikachu is able to learn this move through the use of an item.

==Plagiarism ''of'' Sonichu?==
{{main|List of cards from The Wall of Originals}}

[[Image:CWCpokeymanz.png|thumb]]

Despite Chris's complete lack of originality when it comes to the [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]] [[Rosechu (species)|characters]], there are several Pokémon on the [[Wall of Originals]] that closely resemble actual Pokémon introduced in ''Ruby'', ''Sapphire'', ''Diamond'', and ''Pearl'' versions. What makes this interesting is that these cards were created in the early 2000's, predating the Japanese release of ''Ruby'' and ''Sapphire'' by at least one year, and ''Diamond'' and ''Pearl'' by at least five years. However, much like Chris's "idea" of putting [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|Sonic games on Nintendo consoles]], it is much more likely that the Pokémon's resemblances to Chris's abominations are a coincidence. At least, we can only hope so...

==See also==
*[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]
*[[Card_games#Pok.C3.A9mon_TCG|Pokémon TCG]]
*[[CWC's Pokésite 2]]
*[[Pokéwalker of Fail]]

[[Category: Things Chris has ripped off]]

100 2278

2010-11-10T23:33:50Z

Smtp: Pointless and unneeded. Much like that "reaction" picture shit. Its unfunny, wastes bandwidth and HD space and should just be wiped out if it continues.

[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris struggles even to hold on to the bar.]]
'''100 2278''' is a video [[Chris]] created on 12 [[October 2010]], leaked on 6 [[November 2010]]. Chris attempts to do pull-ups, but shortly after beginning, gives up and admits defeat due to his [[obesity|weight]].

Chris manages to look like even more of a [[pedofork]] than usual, as he grunts and groans in a children's jungle gym.
__TOC__
{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100_2278
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XWTsHUjAwl8}}
| stardate = 6 [[November 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = {{RedYellowStripeShirt|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[ToJackie]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===
[''We see Chris's hands and knees on top on a jungle gym.'']

[''Chris hangs from a bar, not far off the ground for a few seconds before losing his grip and dropping to the ground.'']

[''Chris grunts, tries to grab the bar again.'']

Chris: Ugh...

[''Looks to the camera.'']

Chris: Alright fine, I can't do a pull up. At least I tried.

[''Jumps up and tries to grab the bar again.'']

Chris: Still tryin'.

[''Grunting sounds.''] Well, can't do it.

[''Tries to do a pull-up again with visibly shaking arms, grunts and sighs.'']

Chris: Uh... Too sensitive for my... [''sound of slapping belly''] weight.

[''Chris walks off camera.'']

==Images==
Accompanying the leaked video were a selection of images, presumed to be ones Chris took for [[Jackie]].
<center><gallery>
File:100_2242.JPG
File:100_2243.JPG
File:100_2244.JPG|The [[McIntire Park]] sign
File:100_2245.JPG
File:100_2246.JPG
File:100_2247.JPG
File:100_2248.JPG
File:100_2249.JPG
File:100_2250.JPG
File:100_2251.JPG
File:100_2252.JPG
File:100_2253.JPG
File:100_2296.JPG|Now with extra [[Plush Breasts of Fail|boobage]]
File:100_2299.JPG
File:BeatSketcher20101012.png|Has Chris been improving his art during the dry spell? '''[[Chris and art|SPOILER: NO]]'''
File:ccsonichu.jpg|Chris's [[Chris-chan Sonichu|fursona]], from [[ECV 00002]]
</gallery></center>

== External links ==
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?8ca48v808ae5m0p Download archive]
* [http://goo.gl/AeGkP Mirror]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ToJackie]]|nextlink=Current}}

{{LeakedVideos}}