CWCki - User contributions [en]

CWCipedia

2010-02-28T21:51:32Z

Steffigurke: Cwcipedia is up, intro referred to it in past tense

{{Honest}}
{{protip|CWCipedia is for Chris only. Don't ask for an account or whine about how you can't edit. Also, incorporate stuff from CWCipedia into CWCki to get the high score!!}}

[[Image:CWCipedia Introduction.jpg|thumb|right|Chris proudly claims the CWCipedia in the name of [[CWCville]]]]

{{quote|Abandon hope all ye who enter here.|From Dante's Divine Comedy, eerily summing up CWCipedia}}

'''CWCipedia''' (not to be confused with the [[CWCki]]) <s>is</s> <s>was</s> <s>is</s> <s>was</s> is a wiki set up by the great leader [[Cogsdev]] for the sole use of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], as a sort of personal Wiki as opposed to Chris vandalizing the CWCki with his bullshit. Furthermore, it is designed to allow Chris to "get the truth out" as he so desired to do on [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile|his Wikipedia profile]].

Since its inception, Chris has more or less treated the page as free web hosting, a place to put his comics without having to pay for the resulting bandwidth use. Of course, Chris, being a lazy, [[Autistic|retarded]], manchild fuckface, still managed to fuck it up from time to time, even with a Sysop holding his hand.

CWCipedia also serves as the ultimate test of the use of MediaWiki software and software usability, in that it strives to create a platform that even an autistic manchild/lazy fuck can easily use.

Chris has a tendency to let his mind wander while typing up his entries. For example, in his [[Sonichu]] article he ends up going off on a rant explaining what had happened to [[Kel]] (even though it didn't involve Sonichu at all), and the fact that Chris himself is the leader of the [[CWCville]] Pokémon gym. This leads into Chris describing his supposed gym at length, what Pokémon he has in his team, and his collection of Pokémon in the game (in addition to their level and how he had levelled them). This somehow leads to a fantastically retarded idea for a Pokémon game system that's basically just the holographic projectors from [[Yu-Gi-Oh]], except with Pokémon. After all of that dumbfuckery he gets back to talking about Sonichu again.

==The early days==
Several months after Chris began using the wiki proceeded without incident. He was able to display his comics and music, share more details of his personal life, reveal more background information about the world of CWCville, and shout his bizarre homophobic rantings from the virtual rooftops in peace. The administrators of the site remained a silent, benevolent force behind the scenes.

Towards the end of 2009, this would change.

==CWCipedia Advertisements==
[[Image:Untitled.png|thumb|100px|left|Ensuring that Chris sees them EVERY TIME he visits.]]
[[Image:NewCWCipediaFrontpage.jpg|thumb|Chris's revised frontpage]]
As 2009 came to a close, CWCipedia's operators ran into financial trouble keeping the site in the black, given the many hits it gets on a daily basis and the profusion of large files held on its servers. To help keep the site up and running for its TRUE and LOYAL [[fans]], the Sysop that maintains the website for Chris turned to selling advertising space on the site. Keep in mind that these ads are all randomly generated by metadata created by Chris and the people browsing his site, not special hand-crafted ads made by [[trolls]]. Due to the somewhat complicated laws of the jurisdiction in which the servers reside, ads may only be purchased from within the European Union.

Chris makes '''NO''' money from the advertisement revenue. All of it goes to keeping CWCipedia up and running.

Chris responded to these ads with a few complaints to the admin and [[Jack Thaddeus]], who has so far been the only donor who has delivered over €1000, qualifying him to create custom advertisements on the site. [[CWC Blog#7 December 2009|In a blog post]], Chris hoped that ''someone'' within the EU would be able to step up and donate so much money that they'd not only qualify for custom ads, but help to ''remove'' the homoerotic ads that appeared on the site (even though most online advertisers give ''no'' such heavy-handed preferential treatment to premium advertisers, and indeed, no such stated policy exists in CWCipedia either). Even though it may be tempting for some European fans, the appeal of this opportunity seems limited. You can buy a [[PS3]] for you ''and'' your friend with €1000. Or buy three [[Hex Bawx|Hex-Boxes]]. Or four Wiis. Who ''would'' pass up such an opportunity?

On 27 December 2009, the ad space, which was previously at the very bottom of CWCipedia's navbar on the left side of the page, was moved to the very top of the navbar. Another ad appeared on Chris's main page beside the logo. On 28 December, Chris flipped out and replaced it with an ad for the his beloved [[My Coke Rewards]] program. The Sysop, however, [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User_talk:ChrisChanSonichu#Do_NOT_tamper_with_the_advertisements scolded Chris], telling him that ''he'' had no control over the ads.

On 30 December 2009 Chris, unable to change the now-protected main page, lashed out the only way he could, by adding a block of text to the bottom of his (already hideously ugly) front page image, declaring that no ads were allowed on that page. In the message he said that he would not remove this block of text until the offending ads were removed from the main page. To put this in perspective, Chris ''defaced his own website'' in an attempt to get someone else to stop advertising on it. You can guess how well that worked.

On 2 January 2010, Chris began cluttering the website with his ads again, shilling for [[CWC Cola|Coca-Cola]], [[Wild Sonichu|Avatar]] and [[It's UGH!|Proposition 8]]. He took his self-bestowed title of [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|Captain]] to an absolute extreme, posting the following message to CWCipedia:
{{quote| I have another pair of pages for today, and I will answer another [[Mailbag]] or two after uploading. But I also have another announcement; Jack thinks he can get away with occupying my Introduction Box with ANY Ad, well I have a few items I fully support as well. I will be placing my own Ads around the Cwcipedia, as I assert My Rights to do so [[Chris and his Ego|as Captain of this website vessel]].
'''I DO NOT WANT MY ADS REMOVED OR REPLACED BY ANYONE OTHER THAN MYSELF.'''}}

Additionally, Chris posted the following message to his [[Twitter]]:
{{quote|C.C. Sonichu says:...Removal of Any of ALL of MY Ads is consider Mutiny, and [[Chris and Anger|Mutiny will not be tolerated.]] Stay Safe, and have a good day.}}

As to whether or not [[Cogsdev|Cogs]] and [[Jack Thaddeus|Jack]] will receive forty lashes less one for their inevitable insubordination, Chris has no comment.

Due to gay porn ads on the CWCipedia, on 01 [[February 2010]] Chris [[Address to Mao, the S.O.B.|unleashed]] a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]] upon Mao "Bamboo" Ling, after which he "[[Apologies to Alec and Evan|apologized]]" to Alec and [[Evan]].

Eventually, on 26 [[February 2010]], Jack Thaddeus returned with an unclickable ad reading "JACK'S BACK" (in text) and featuring a picture of a man performing comeuppance. Chris has yet to react.

{{collapsible
|CWCipedia advertisement gallery. ''Note: The captions in this gallery are the alt text and links for the ads.''
|<gallery>
Image:CWCipediaAudiobookAd.jpg|[http://www.youtube.com/user/vivitheg#g/c/4EAA2A54AFDDFBE1 Watch the newest audiobooks here!]
Image:CWCipediaAutismAd.jpg|[http://www.aspergerfoundation.org.uk/ Asperger's Syndrome is a serious condition. Get the Facts.]
Image:CWCipediaVlasicAd.jpg|[http://www.vlasic.com/ Taste the Juicy Crunch!]
Image:CWCipediaGayRightsAd.jpg|[http://gayrights.change.org/ Support Family Guys everywhere!]
Image:CWCipediaMexicoAd.jpg|[http://mexico-travel.com/ Discover the facinating world of Mexico]
Image:AxeAd1.png|We all know how [[homos|manly]] [[Axe]] is.
Image:AxeAd2.jpg|In stores now!
Image:Beepboop.png|[http://answers.polldaddy.com/poll/2571589/ PollDaddy Answers Poll]
Image:DateThree.png|[http://www.lotsofloves.com/ Quit playing the waiting game!]
Image:DebtConsolidation.gif|A [[Chris and money| Chris and his money]] are soon parted
Image:DicksSporting.png|[http://www.dickssportinggoods.com/home/index.jsp No Joke]
Image:Diversity.png|But [[niggos|"No Darkies"]]
Image:DuckPreservationSociety.png|[http://www.woodducksociety.com/ You should always take good care of your duck!]
Image:Eyesight.png|Plus, if you go blind, you can't enjoy shirtless men.
Image:Fkinglie.png
Image:GayAutismCure.jpg|Get yours today!
Image:GayAutisticSingles.jpg|The man of your dreams could be living next door!
Image:GayAutisticSon.jpg|I bet Chris [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|Could.]] [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes|Twice]].
Image:GayDrawing1.png|[[Sonichu (comic)|Case in point.]]
Image:GayDrawing2.png|You know what sounds like [[Autism|artistic]]?
Image:GayForGod.png|[[Rocky Shoemaker|Rocky]] Approves.
Image:GayOtakuSexClub.jpg|Can I bring my [[Anime Wings]]?
Image:GayPokemonDVDs.png|That's digusting! Get a [[Muscle bra]] and cover up!
Image:GLISTENINGHALF-NAKEDBLACKMEN.jpg|This one is my favorite.
Image:Heavenlyreward.png|After you die, you get your [[Semen#Comeuppance|Comeuppance]].
Image:HEXBAWKSad.png|A [[Hex Bawx|"Life upgrade"]].
Image:HGwait4u1.png|He's already a [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|fan]]
Image:HGwait4u2.png|AUTISM HOOOOOOU~
Image:Hitlerpedia.png|[http://www.archives.gov/exhibits/charters/bill_of_rights.html Bill of Rights]
Image:HOTTHROBBINGGAYCOCKjpg.jpg|Cumming to butts near you.
Image:JoinTheNavy.gif|[http://www.pinknews.co.uk/news/articles/2005-425.html/ DON'T ASK DON'T TELL]
Image:JustGuys.png|There's nothing wrong with [[High_school#Social_life|only hanging out with one gender]]
Image:Knight.png
Image:PlayNow.png
Image:Kool-Aid.png|It's recommended by 9 out of 10 High Functioning Autistics
Image:LearnAboutIslam.png|Chris has lots of [[mailbag|fans in the middle east]]
Image:Lipitor.png|Better [[Chris and health|stop taking it]] before it makes you [[homos|gay]]
Image:Mystery pic.png|Can you identify our mystery penis?
Image:Naivewater.png|[[Naïve|It's not what you think it is]]
Image:OK2BGay.png|[http://okaytobegay.blogspot.com/ There's a big difference between bending down and kneeling over]
Image:OxieCleanAd.gif|GETS OUT AUTISM, FAST! HERE'S HOW TO ORDER!
Image:PickelParty.png|Sounds promising
Image:PicklePops.png|Pop a Pickle in your mouth today!
Image:PKMN4HP.gif|That HP kid is a total [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spastic spaz]
Image:Sexvote.png|[http://answers.polldaddy.com/poll/2571589/ PollDaddy Answers Poll]
Image:Specialsomeone.png|They don't meet the [[Attraction Sign|requirements]]
Image:This2this.png|Go from [[Obesity|THIS]] to [[Clyde Cash|THIS]]!
Image:VirginiaLaw.png|[[Jerkop|I am the LAW]]
Image:CWCipediaChrisLesGayAd.png|[http://www.eflgc.org.uk/ What do you mean, 'gay and Christian'? It's not possible... or is it?]

</gallery>}}

==The Twitter Feed==
{{main|Twitter}}

On 25 December 2009, the WikiSysop added a live Twitter feed to the [[Mailbag|mailbag]]. This was short-lived, as on the early morning of the 27th Chris removed it in a fit of rage and added the following note:

{{quote|o I will have NO DISCUSSIONS GOING ON BEHIND MY BACK ON MY OWN WEBSITE WHATSOEVER!

I DO NOT SUPPORT YOU GOD DAMN GAYS!!! I F***ING HATE ALL OF YOU WHO ARE THE MAJORITY OF TROLLS WHO MESS WITH ME AND MY LIFE!

GO GET YOUR OWN LIFE AND LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

NO TWITTER ALLOWED!!!|

--ChrisChanSonichu 04:31, 27 December 2009 (CET) }}

Exactly five minutes later Chris would create a special page for the [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Twitter Twitter] feed, and delete the homophobic outburst quoted above. Chris would create a Twitter account for himself [[Chris and hypocrisy|the very next day]], regaling his fans with stories of him doing yardwork. The wise and magnanimous Wiki Administrator later put to the feed to the front page of CWCipedia, due to the fact that ''(ahem)'' it probably needed some wider exposure.

==CWCipedia Closed Due To A<strike>I</strike>DS==
[[Image:CWCipedia-Home-Copyright.jpg|thumb|right|The CWCipedia as it appeared on 1/1/10]]
During the last weeks of 2009, Chris became more infuriated as the gay ads continued piling up. In desperation, Chris began placing ads of his own that didn't inspire uncomfortable questions about his sexuality. The Sysop became furious at Chris's unauthorized interference and warned him that if he didn't remove the ads, serious consequences could happen.

On 2 January 2010, the CWCipedia was served a cease and desist notice by [[Trolls|the Coca-Cola Company]] for its unauthorized use of their logo on the site. Thus, the Sysop was forced to close the website for a few days until the matter could be resolved. Having learned a little first-hand regarding what [[Chris and copyright|copyright law]] is all about, Chris issued an [[This_was_my_fault|apology]] on YouTube. In the video he claimed that he thought Coke would appreciate the free advertisement, but he is completely unaware that no self-respecting company would ever want their product to be associated with his [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page Website of Fail].

Within a few days the site was returned to normal.

==CWCipedia Closed (Again) Due To Theft==
[[Image:Cwcipedia closed again.jpg|thumb|right|The CWCipedia's source page as of 2/6/10]]
In the early morning of 6 Feburary 2010, the CWCipedia was closed down again, this time thanks to a DMCA request from representatives of [[Evan|Evan George]]. According to the request, Chris's use of the character [[Simonla Rosechu]] on his website and in his comics infringes upon Evan's intellectual property, as Simonla is clearly a derivative of Evan's character [[Fan:Simonchu|Simonchu]]. This was most likely triggered by Chris's announcement, [[5_February_2010|in a video from 5 February]], that he agreed to do away with Simonla and stop featuring her in his comics, but only at an unspecified "later" time.

Three days after the CWCipedia was locked to edits, it was wiped from the internet entirely. In its place appeared a redirect link to Asperpedia; however, due to a bug, it redirected to an online role-playing game, ''Dogs of the Seas''.

==CWCipedia lives on==
On 12 February 2010, the CWCipedia was revived to a certain extent. Although it was still locked to edits and only a "login required" screen was accessible, it was functional enough for Alec Benson Leary to display the first two pages of "[[Asperchu#Sonichu_Revolution|Sonichu Revolution]]." The next day, Chris fulfilled [[Evan]]'s request and the CWCipedia was restored for all people to see. "Sonichu Revolution" continued onward from there, prominently featured at the top of every page of the CWCipedia.

On 24 February 2010, a new set of ads appeared on the CWCipedia, calling Chris out on his [[Christian Love Day (video)|unwarranted self-importance]] on his birthday, with a message from [[Fan: Moon-Pals|Sean]] imploring fans to give gifts to victims in Haiti instead. The next day, CWCipedia vanished for a couple of minutes for unknown reasons. Likely due to Wild and Simonla's [[Sandy Rosechu|bastard child]].

==See also==
*[[Mailbag]]
*[[CWC Blog]]
*[[CWC's Sonichu Site!]]
*[[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence]]
*[[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]
*[[:Category:Articles with matching CWCipedia articles|CWCki articles with matching CWCipedia articles]]

==External links==
*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page CWCipedia]
*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Special:Recentchanges Recent Changes] - monitor Chris's latest updates
*[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Special:Recentchanges&feed=rss Recent Changes RSS Feed] - receive Chris's latest updates automatically

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Chris's websites]]
[[Category:CWCipedia]]
{{Documents}}

Autism

2010-02-25T20:12:23Z

Steffigurke: /* External links */ Added link to Sexuality and Autism page, somebody might want to mention some of the points made

<center>
{{#ev:youtube|2cpyKTun5iU}}
</center>

{{quote|I'm POSSIBLY retarded...|Chris on his autism, [[Mumble]] chat 23 February 2009}}

{{quote|I'M RETARDED|Chris, [[CWC - Exposing Jeff]]}}

{{quote|It sometimes takes me a long while before I can fully comprehend and make an appropriate reaction. In another word, '''I am Sometimes Retarded'''.|Chris, on himself.<ref>6th paragraph down: http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality</ref>}}

[[Image:086-BionicFlag.jpg|thumb|[[Bionic the Hedgehog]] "conquering" autism (and "ATcI3S") by confusing windmills with watermills.]]
[[Image:461-AutismFight.jpg|thumb|Chris at war with autism (or "ATSIMU") in [[China]]. Too bad you can't fight cannons with [[fangs]].]]

'''Autism''' is a spectrum of neurological disorders involving the impairment of social interaction and communication. Informally, autism may be subdivided into separate classifications based on the intelligence and degree of function the autistic individual possesses, although these subdivisions are not recognized by the [[Wikipedia:DSM-IV|DSM-IV-TR]] or the [[Wikipedia:ICD-10|ICD-10]].

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] has built much of his identity around having '''high-functioning autism''' (HFA), which is vaguely defined as the ability to live in the mainstream world as opposed to being institutionalized, near-normal comprehension, and about-average intellect (although it isn't actually a formal clinical diagnosis so much as a grade of severity). As such, he tries to have it both ways: you can't blame him for his shortcomings because he has autism, but you can't treat him like he's mentally handicapped and [[slow in the mind]] because he's ''high-functioning'' and therefore, nearly normal.

Chris didn't want to be in special ed because he isn't retarded, yet he expects every single teacher he comes in contact with to have an expert understanding of autism spectrum disorders. He perceives bias against autistic people (read: HIM, he doesn't care about anyone else) everywhere, and assumes anyone opposing his will hates him for his mental condition and are playing "everyone's favorite game, [[Kick the Autistic]]."

In case you don't already want to punch him, he's also stated he "Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People."<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Aspergers http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Aspergers]</ref> Obviously, there was never such a thing as autism until Chris came into existence.

==Background==
It is not currently clear exactly how he came to be diagnosed as "autistic", other than that he was diagnosed at the age of 6, receives government disability checks (his "[[monthly tugboat]]") for this mental disability, and he and his parents have been using his condition as a crutch from almost day one of his diagnosis.

In a [[CWCipedia]] [[mailbag]], Chris claims that when he was young, his parents were told he would never be able to read, write or function on a normal level. He and his doctors have now upgraded his condition to "high-functioning," but apparently his incredibly abysmal upbringing has actually allowed it to progress to mid-functioning at best.

According to Chris, his autism manifested when he was locked in his room by a [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]] around age 1 1/2. After bawwwing for hours, he emerged from his lair unable to talk, which Chris says was when "God put the mute button on me." However, most specialists claim that the symptoms of autism begin to show around that age anyway,<ref>[[wikipedia:Autism#Characteristics|Wikipedia: Autism Characteristics]]</ref> so Chris is full of [[shit|it]].

{{clear}}

==Chris's symptoms==

Many [[troll]]s dispute the exact diagnosis of Chris's mental condition, on the basis that his observed behavior is inconsistent with various autistic people. CWC-related forums (and other forums, for that matter) have seen numerous testimonials about people who are undeniably autistic but nowhere near as fucked-up as Chris has turned out to be, and in general these forums do not consider Chris to be an example of what all autistic people are like. Quite often, autistics are indeed able to learn social skills to some small degree in the context of intellectual learning. Some can even come off as being completely neurotypical because they have come to realize that, while they believe "normal" behavior has a tenuous definition, they must adapt to others' expectations of what's acceptable if they wish to succeed in life. Chris, however, appears to demonstrate a willful ignorance of normalcy, with a sense of entitlement coupled with an expectation that others should not only understand [[Attraction Sign|his]] [[CWC-isms|ridiculous]] [[Sonichu|idiosyncrasies]] in the first place, but also accept them or even force [[Dating education|them]] upon others.

A layperson may come to the conclusion that Chris is not autistic, and he's just a regular (albeit idiotic) guy with a few "eccentricities" (more like psychotic), or jump to the other extreme and conclude that Chris has full-blown mental retardation. However, Chris's characteristics are most likely a combination of [[Barbara|bad parenting]] and genuine autism. The following are aspects of Chris's character that clearly match autistic tendencies:

[[Image:0695-AnnaBD9.JPG|thumb|right|Awkward body language, as Chris displays here, is a common trait of autism.]]
*Chris lacks a conversational filter. He calls this [[Honest Content|honesty]]; normal people call it social retardation. Without provocation he will tell you about his pinkeye and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]], and how he is a [[virgin with rage]].
*Chris speaks in a monotone, as evidenced by his many videos. His attempts to sound expressive (see [[CWC's Message for Ivy]]) are rather creepy and unnatural. He sounds a little like he is reading off an offscreen cue card. On [[Song of Christian]], however, he sounds a bit more normal, if also a bit like Conker.
*Chris can't show emotions well with facial expressions and body language. See [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters|his statement to the women of the world]] if you like having Chris haunt your dreams. His inability to display emotions on his face has been called a "[[The Creepy Stare|dead fish expression]]." When he does attempt to have an expression, it looks very cartoonish.
*Chris lacks empathy for others. See his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|plea]] to Clyde. His suggestion after the loss of [[Ryan Cash]] was "find yourself a girlfriend." He asks for ED to [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|please understand]] him, because he is an "innocent victim of misunderstanding"—he wants empathy from others, but he can't return the favor. This lack of empathy is only magnified by his parents having coddled him as a child and given him no real reason to empathize with other people.
*Chris is extremely gullible. One need only see his extensive list of [[Trolls|sweethearts]] to see just how easily fooled he is. In addition, not only has he been fooled by trolls pretending to be girls, he has fallen for trolls pretending to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] and approaching him about making a Sonichu game.
*Chris has trouble developing relationships. This is a common trait among people in general, but Chris is particularly inept at socializing. As stated above, he has no filter on what he says and cannot empathize with others, key things needed for interacting with people. He also pretty much just talks about himself.
*Chris thinks in absolutes and in terms of clearly defined steps in order to do something. He thinks there must be sex on or by the [[third date]]. He describes his sadness in terms of his [[heart level]] and briefly mentioned a [[Scale of Respect]]. He feels that if he just knows the correct steps to getting a [[sweetheart]], he will be able to find one easily. His [[dating education|crash-course in dating]] and [[Dating|suggestions to Blanca]] assume that a relationship should follow a rigidly predetermined progression instead of a natural flow.
*Chris tends to use solipsistic neologisms; that is, he creates new words that only he himself understands and expects other people to comprehend them. Many articles on this very wiki have been written to explain the resulting [[CWC-isms]].
*Chris exhibits compulsive and repetitive behavior. He wears the same [[shirt]] for days at a time, and uses the same terms and [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|exact]] [[boyfriend-free girl|phrases]] [[sweetheart from the ground-up|frequently]]. He feels the need to refer to people by their full names, plainly visible when he talks about himself, [[Clyde Cash]], or [[Adam Stackhouse]].
*Chris has an extremely narrow range of interests. He seems to only give a damn about video games and prowling for his next [[sweetheart]] and often wishes to [[dating|combine]] two [[LBP#First Date Level|interests]].
*Chris' given reasons for his love of [[My Little Pony]] is also indicative of autism. Autistics are drawn to physical sensations which give them a feeling of being 'grounded', and this is probably why Chris finds stroking the hair of these toys so "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|therapeutic]]".
*Chris lacks social awareness. One notable instance, as revealed in the [[autism papers]], was when two [[Niggos|African American]] ladies were speaking to Chris about his love quest, when Chris politely told them that they could not be his girlfriend because they were not white. Based on the report of the examiner, Chris believed he was merely informing the ladies as to his prerequisites for a potential sweetheart while oblivious to the fact he was being racially insensitive.<ref>[[Autism_papers#IDENTIFYING_STATEMENT:]]</ref>
*Believe it or not, the gastrointestinal problems are also indicative of autism.

Oddly enough, he claims to have conquered his autism, or "coming out of [his] autistic shell," but frequently brings it up and uses it as an excuse for just about everything.

==Chris on the causes of autism==
Although the root causes of autism are still a subject of considerable research and debate, there's a strong consensus that the condition largely arises from genetic factors. Children born to parents of relatively advanced age — parents like Bob and Barbara Chandler, who were respectively over 50 and over 40 when Chris was born — are believed to be particularly at risk.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_autism#Genetics</ref>

During his [[Father Call|phone call with Kacey's father]], Chris swore up and down that heredity has nothing to do with autism: "It's a myth. That's a myth. Autism is not genetic." Kacey corrected his misconception not long afterward, but given Chris's attachment to all sorts of demented beliefs, it probably didn't stick for very long.

In the past, Chris has blamed his autism on an [[abusive babysitter]] from his childhood. [[Mailbag 12]], however, saw Chris actually reveal where [[fail|Autism comes from]]:

{{quote|Autism is Not Genetic; it comes from a shot the doctor's optionally give to the child after birth.|Chris, being completely idiotic once again}}

It seems likely that Chris subscribes to the persistent, but thoroughly debunked theory linking autism to certain childhood vaccinations, although it's possible that his towering persecution complex caused him to imagine a similar conspiracy theory all on his own.

==Autism cured?==
[[Image:454-CWCsPossibleFuture.JPG|thumb|Autism appears to be in Chris's future...]]
In a moment that is sure to shock the mental health community, Chris confided in his [[gal pal]] [[Sarah May]] that, as of 04 [[March 2009]], he has overcome his autism once and for all:

:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I'm not going to blame it on my autism; I have realized that I am over that now.
:'''Sarah May:''' Over what?
:'''Sarah May:''' Over your autism?
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' yes
:'''Sarah May:''' . . .
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' anyway, what is it that you want to do?
:'''Sarah May:''' Christian
:'''Sarah May:''' Are you serious?
:'''Sarah May:''' Autism is not influenza
:'''Sarah May:''' You don't 'get over it'
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I've broken out of my autistic shell, and I am better able to socialize in public, with the past practices online.

Chris claims during the same chat that he may not be making sense due to a virus, easily allowing for him to retract this. Fortunately, Chris has discovered that [[stress]] is a more socially popular scapegoats for his personal shortcomings. Of course, people learn to manage stress but what do you expect?

As of [[May 2009]], Chris seems to have regained Autism and is back to [[Chris on Wikipedia|blaming it]] for all his problems, seemingly believing that Autism is as easy to shake/regain as the common flu. Or he forgot that he even had the above conversation and is just retarded.

[[November 2009]] saw Chris claiming to have cured his autism again as stated at the end of part 2 on his [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] presentations (where he describes himself as a "high functioning autistic ''recovered''"). A [[December 2009|month later]], Chris says in the [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|revised ED article]] in response to ED's claim he's "suffering" from autism, he comments "''which I still am for real.''"

==Chris vs. Asperger's==
If there's anything Chris hates more than [[homos]] or trolls, it's anyone who dares try to steal his limelight. The worst of those are anyone who has [[Asperger's]] or are deemed "low-functioning". As such, Chris is shown to be very "close-minded" about the subject and will get violent over anyone trying to prove the fact that Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism are nearly identical.

==Chris and Low-Functioning Autism==
Disgustingly, Chris detests [[Slow-in-the-minds|low-functioning autistics]]. In [[Mailbag 25]], he compares those with low-functioning autism with those who suffer from severe retardation or severe brain damage, thinking that their arms would be linked together, have deformations, confined to wheelchairs or crutches and drool and grunt and growl. He has also compared them to "zombies".<ref>[[Mailbag_5#In which Chris speaks ill of the handicapped|Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_11#Elevators are important for the handicapped, so they don't want any phobias|Mailbag 11]]</ref> <ref>[[Mailbag_25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]]</ref>In his [[Father Call|phone call to Matt Devoria]], he refuses to date a girl with any form of autism because he fears that seeing them will make him think about what he might be like if he had anything other than high-functioning autism. He also may think he's higher-functioning than any other high-functioning autistic.

==Things Chris has blamed on his autism==
Everything.

==What other aspies think of Chris==

* [http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=14371 Aspies For Freedom thread] where Chris or someone pretending to be Chris asks for help against [[ED]]. The aspies offer the usual advice of ignoring the [[trolls]], which by the way is the best advice.

* [http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=15676 Aspies For Freedom thread] where someone asks about Chris, but everyone else just wants to avoid the drama. A few of them realize that what ED says is true even though it may be a "hate site". Apparently, previous drama involving Chris led them to disable registration.

* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNd1ihfD6gc An autistic guy] calls Chris "the worst human being to ever exist from God's green earth" and an embarrassment to autistics around the world. Truer words have never been spoken.

Tl;dr: Chris has no support in the online autistic community unless it's from someone who would rather he commit suicide.

==Sauce==
<references/>

==See also==
* [[Asperger syndrome]]
* [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]
* [[A-U-T-I-S-M]]
* [[Chris and psychology]]
* [[Kick the Autistic]]
* [[Slow-in-the-minds]]
* [[Stress]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ix5Ith-fSU 1 winged autistic]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QdGOGV7WX0 The Tard-Man - Autistic Adventures - Director's Cut]
*[http://www.autismuk.com/index9sub.htm Sexuality and Autism]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Autistic Spectrum Disorders]]
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Chris and sex

2010-02-25T00:18:56Z

Steffigurke: /* Moral basis on sex and double standards */ Added link to third date page

{{Honest}}
{{oversized}}
[[Chris]] has a warped view of '''sex''' (aka "hanky panky"), mostly stemming from stunted sexual development and a sheltered upbringing. He first developed an understanding of sex from watching softcore porn on HBO around age 16. He views pornographic films as "educational" and regularly purchases [[sex toys]] from AdamEve.com.

== Knowledge of sex and gender ==
[[Image:Thenightmarecontinues.jpg|thumb|Seven inches? Yeah, right.]]
Due to the combined threat of his somewhat [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]] and his peculiar mindset on sex, Chris is noticeably confused about sexual terminology. While he ''may'' have the best of intentions, his word choices unwittingly present him in a very bad light. Chris repeatedly refers to women as the "opposite gender" as opposed to "opposite sex." By definition, "gender" refers to the personality of a person, while "sex" refers to the physiology or genetics of a person. So a request from Chris for love from the opposite gender, is an open invitation to MTF trannies. In [[Sonichu 9]], he referred to women as another species. While at times it may seem as if females are from another planet, they are still classified as ''Homo sapiens'', just like men.

In his world, Chris has mastered all there is to know about sex, and now regards himself as a bit of a guru. He has said that kissing a woman is "magical and delightful...sweet and melting like ice cream or chocolate".<ref>[[Mailbag 18#He might as well be talking about how to pilot the space shuttle|Mailbag 18]]</ref> He claims he learned everything from simply watching porn and hentai, and basic high school sex education. Who would think that such art forms could be this beneficial? This thinking has certainly worked wonders for Chris, who now believes that [[mass debating|masturbating]] a whole fucking lot will ultimately make him better at sex. And, he has a subscription to ''Playboy''!

Chris also suffers from the delusion that his [[duck|penis]] is [[Giant Penis Comic|huge]]. Unfamiliar with the concept of "inconsistency," he'll still claim the former. He also has a flaccidity problem, which is possibly a hormonal pathology or [[Wikipedia:Peyronie's disease|Peyronie's disease]]. Despite this obvious lack of virility, he is still a stud in his own mind.

Chris has advised little children to play with the opposite gender's toys. According to him, boys should get [[My Little Pony]]s, and girls ought to go for [[Transformers]], all to better understand the opposite gender. Go ahead, take advice from a 28-year-old virgin retard (seriously, don't). In his [[Sonichu 9|Dating ED]] comic, the teacher gave boys "Barbara" dolls, while the girls received "Robert" dolls. Disturbingly enough, these are the names of his parents. This is consistent with Freudian psychology - to a child, their parents are their model for sexual relationships. Of course, Chris's selfish ass doesn't realize that not everyone is lucky (if you could call it that) enough to have parents like his.

Among other views of gender, Chris reveals a lot of sexist tendencies. Based on his failed attempts at getting girls at the mall, he has concluded that all girls are already paired up, lesbians, or distracted with shopping. He can’t seem to acknowledge the possibility that women just might not be drawn to a fat, dumpy psycho, carrying an "[[attraction sign]]" and followed by the unpleasant aroma of [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|shit]] mixed with [[AXE]]. This view is supported by [[Barbara]], who tells him how handsome and special he is, and how the girls won't be able to keep their hands off him. He obviously doesn't realize that all parents think their kids are the most beautiful little snowflakes in the world, and probably still sees her as an unbiased source for compliments.

To further reiterate just how straight he is, Chris released his infamous [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 18th, 2009|dildo crushing video]], featuring a sign on the back of his foot — which he uses to proclaim that HE IS STRAIGHT for the 9001st time — containing a crude drawing of a female body, consisting of breasts and a hairy vagina. Because this is what all straight men do to assert their heterosexuality.

== Moral basis on sex and double standards ==
[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|thumb|250px|69ing? Intercourse? LOL. I mean ''really''? In a ''children's'' comic? 'Cuz they know all about this stuff.]]
{{quote|You have heard that it was said by them of old time, You shall not commit adultery: But I say to you, That whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.|Matthew 5:27-28}}

Sex as viewed through Chris's eyes is dictated by the Christian bible. Chris is very strict on keeping to the word of God when homosexuality is the topic, vehemently stating that he ''hates'' [[homos]], but not hesitating to view lesbian porn and approve of it ("I like dykes[…]"). This logic probably stems from an episode of ''[[Family Guy]]'' where one of Meg's friends states that lesbianism is a choice, while male homosexuality isn't. This comment was intended as a joke, but like most satire, it flew straight over Chris's head. Another violation of his Christian morals is the fact that he plans on not losing his virginity until a [[Third date|third or fourth date]] with his true sweetheart (read: first girl who will last three dates with Chris). Well, guess that the whole “no sex till marriage thing” doesn’t matter that much now, does it?

The Christian Bible also frowns upon pornographers and sodomites, both sins of which he is guilty and holds no visible remorse. These double standards cause many trolls to despise him, seeing as he selectively chooses what to dogmatize and what is OK. In his defense, he did used to drink his own [[semen|cum]], so that the seed of his loins wouldn’t get lost à la Onan (but he probably doesn't know about that, so it's still just him being stupid). It is still uncertain whether he enjoys the taste of his [[semen|navy]], or just is simply too retarded to figure out that masturbation ''itself'' is the sin, not spilling your DNA. Whatever the reason, it's hilarious. It should also be noted that by doing this, he is technically eating his own [[Crystal|children]]. He also believes that premarital sex is okay as long as he's wearing a condom, because that means there will be a barrier between his [[duck]] and her [[china]]. Again, he doesn't understand that the sex itself is the sin, and not whether they're touching or not.

Despite being told many a time about these fallacies, even quoting passages of the Bible, he will deny it. This is partially because he goes to a very liberal church, and any question about premarital sex is interpreted quite liberally by [[Rocky]]. When Chris has confronted Rocky about passages quoted to him by the trolls, she only fuels his cafeteria Christianity by saying things like sex before marriage is okay as long as the couple is in love, which is wrong by Christian doctrine. He can't hold a conservative view of homosexuality and a liberal view of fornication at the same time. Some might call this doublethink, but those who know better know it's just Chris being too retarded to understand hypocrisy.

In fact, Chris seems to consider a women sexual partner as a rubber stamp over his (alleged) sexual orientation. Flying in the face of any moral system he ever held, he announced his desire to upload on internet [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The Introduction Image Space is NOT Ad Space (CCS)|the video of his first full sexual intercourse]]. When interrogated over the desire of his partner's legitimate desire of intimacy, he merely added that he would simply [[Mailbag 31#In which Chris crosses yet another line|hide cameras, record the event without her consent and blur her face before making the video public]]. This brazen attitude toward women only validates us with an image of what a woman is for Chris: a [[Megan Schroeder|living, sentient sex-toy]] existing only to validate him as a heterosexual.

==Chris in the act==
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right]]
Leaked tapes of Chris's audio sex with [[Julie]], and the infamous [[sex tape]] with [[Kimmi]] shed light on Chris as he acts out on his fantasies. In particular, the sex tape shows how Chris assumes ''female'' positions, notably riding on top of Kimmi in a scene straight out of a porno. Since Chris's entirety of knowledge about sexual relationships stems from ignoring the men in pornography (due to fear of becoming a homo), Chris assumes that it's perfectly normal for a man to ride on top, lean forward, and moan while calling out his partner's name.

Chris's view of cunnilingus involves slobbering all over a woman's vagina in the same way a dog would slobber over his master. Despite all his knowledge of porn, he fails to see how cunnilingus is more than just slobbering, but proper tongue action to stimulate the clitoris (if he even knows what ''that'' is).

Chris having sex also involves shouting his lover's name (JUUULAAAAAAY!!!) in the same way an adolescent would shout out "PENIS" during the Penis Game — again, copying what he sees in porn. Chris constantly speaks in a monotone yet high pitched and feminine voice, without any real feeling.

Chris takes an extremely long time to orgasm in these leaked media, suggesting that he may have some issues with delayed orgasm. This can either be physiological (possibly from his bent duck, fat ass, lack of endurance) or psychological (possibly performance anxiety, high expectations, subconscious guilt about sex) in nature.

Some argue that based on such leaked media, Chris may not actually enjoy sex as a manifestation for expressing love or even for physical sensations, but in a more childlike way of getting some psychological satisfaction from doing something "naughty" and "adult." He only wants to have sex so that he won't be a [[virgin with rage]] anymore, and can be regarded as "normal."

==Staying straight==
''See also [[Homos#Fear of being a homo|Fear of being a homo]]''

Chris apparently thinks that homosexuality is contagious. He feels that spending time with men will turn him gay, so he insists on only having female friends ([[gal pal]]s). He admitted to using a ''[[Sailor Moon]]'' poster to stay straight. When he met a gay friend of [[Megan]]'s, he became hostile. In his apology letter to Megan, he had this to say:

{{quote|Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."'| Chris, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*" , Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm)}}

Chris's answers to [[Mailbag|fan mail]] suggest that he is bombarded by constant homoerotic thoughts and uses several unhealthy coping methods to suppress them:

{{quote|Although the gender change would be my "rather-to-do" over becoming a homo, but in your case, I would suggest looking at women more, fantasize yourself with their breasts and pussys [sic]; do this continuously. Hypnotize yourself; every time you have a homo thought, you will feel like you are being shocked by lightning and that it really hurts. And every time you fantasize women, breasts and pussy, you will feel calm, relaxed and good. But DO NOT hurt yourself physically for real; that would be really bad. In other words, you would be reprogramming your brain. | Chris, [[Mailbag 3]]}}

{{quote|First off, should such images enter your mind at random, just stop yourself. I have had this problem too. I would take all such images when they enter my mind and just delete them; I imagine, in my mind, rolling them all into a ball, shrinking it down, and tossing them into a garbage can that links to my Stomach through a direct bodily vein. I imagine the feeling of it falling through the vein and making its splash landing into the stomach acid and dissolving; gone forever. | Chris, [[Mailbag 4]]}}

In an [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC fan chat]], Chris went so far as wanting to make homosexuality illegal:
{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls".|Chris, 02 January 09, 11:59}}

When asked how he would go about this, he commented that homosexuals would be "taken in and reprogrammed with multiple upon multiple pleasurable moments with female prison inmates and prosts[itutes]" and that "prisons will no longer be divided between gender." Take a moment to consider how twisted that would be. He justifies this by saying that "it's bad enough they're mostly jerks, plus homo men are AGAINST God's will." Apparently lazy, greedy, sexually lascivious, vengeful retards who wish damnation upon others are all part of God's divine plan.

Chris also believes his "straight" blood could be used to engineer some kind of anti-gay vaccine:

{{quote|Spoiler Alert: In the comic, during my time in the void, I end up at a later year when scientists have truly isolated the Homo Gene, and needed to isolate the Straight Gene to make the Vaccine. I Personally Volunter [sic] a bit of my blood, they find the Straight Gene, and I take a couple of syringes with me back into the void on my trek back to my time. Guess who will be the first to be injected and transformed back to his past self Permanently... [[Reldnahc]]. I took two syringes for in case one of them breaks or gets lost.| Chris, [[Mailbag 1]]}}

The true irony of Chris' homophobia lies in his own logic. Chris hates [[Jerks|every male on the face of the earth]] save his [[Bob Chandler|father]] due to numerous rejections from women, under the guise of them already having boyfriends. [[Dating education|Completely confident]] that he is a perfect Adonis and that there must be some other reason women reject him, Chris took their statements to heart and came up with the [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]. Now, if the the entire gay community were strapped down and tortured into being straight, Chris' already pathetically slim chances of finding a [[Boyfriend-Free Girl]] rocket down another notch, increasing the manchild's chances of dying alone, and the Gene Pool taking a step forward.

TL;DR: Chris want to force all men into being straight, even though it would be a step back for rational society, and — even by his own standards — bad for him.

==Is Chris asexual?==
There is a possibility that Chris is asexual, and only emphasizes his being STRAIGHT due to the overwhelming portrayal in the media of men being sexually active and heterosexual. This could also explain some of his twisted views regarding sex and romance. He genuinely could not understand the appeal of most sexual activity, and just "goes through the motions." This would also explain why it appears as if he's uncontrollably horny all the time, as being fixated on sex with females means he's a straight adult. He also seems to have the perception that sex is a rite of passage, and that you cannot be regarded as an adult until you lose your virginity.

* He has the idea he must "maintain" his straightness, much like how he must regularly change the oil in the [[Son-Chu|Sonichu-mobile]]. While it could be that he is a homo deep down inside, it can also be argued that he has no major sexual compulsions of any kind, and is just trying to induce them through [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|external sources]]. Why else would he have to try so hard?

* According to himself, Chris only masturbates twice a week, and states that it's only to keep his "[[Mass debating#Frequency|hormones under control]]," while most men masturbate daily, sometimes more.

* Chris did not discover masturbation until the age of 16, while most men figure it out once they hit puberty (around 11). Which would mean that either he had no libido or sexual interest in girls... or he's too stupid to figure out how to diddle himself. 16 was also the age where he pretty much discovered sex, not through physical sensation, but through an external source, in this case HBO's softcore films.

* Chris's interest in finding a [[sweetheart]] appears to have been spurred on by a desire for companionship, as opposed to a desire for a sexual relationship. This is supported by his constant emphasis on being "lonely," as well as requiring his heartsweet to be "caring and compassionate" (which is both ironic and stupid, as he wouldn't be able to reciprocate any companionship received, and who would want to be in a relationship with someone who ''isn't'' "caring and compassionate"?).

* Going with the above, in the ''[[Story of My Love Quest Days]]'', Christian states that he does not want a girlfriend for "hanky panky" but instead: "I need a Girlfriend, ''Solely'' for LOVE and TRUST!" [Emphasis added] Then again, this could just be his attempt at looking gentlemanly, and totally ''not'' perverted and sexist.

* While his creepy attempts at touching/kissing [[Megan]] and [[Emily|other]] [[kacey|girls]] would indicate some form of sexuality, it could be part of his limited perception of what it means to be a sexually active adult, or just pure and simple attempts at being straight under the rationale that if he does this to a woman, this makes him not a homo. He's not trying to molest girls and chase them around with a sign out of sexual desire, but rather out of a desire to be seen as either "straight" and/or "adult".

However, one should consider the fact that some autistics simply do not understand sexual attraction (for example, autistic and hugbox inventor [[Wikipedia:Temple Grandin|Temple Grandin]] chooses to be celibate because she admits that she really does not understand sexual attraction and that she lacks the ability, as a consequence of her autism, to engage in a sexual relationship). Chris could very well not be genuinely interested in sex not due to asexuality, but because he genuinely does not understand why two people would want to get together and have sexual intercourse, aside from the fact he's seen people in the media do it and that he thinks that sex is a rite of passage to becoming a [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|big boy]]. Just wait until he finds out that's not the definition of adulthood, that growing up brings things like responsibility, along with the expectation that you'll be able to support yourself and others, and have meaningful relationships. Don't worry, he won't. He never learns.

When asked about it in the [[Mailbag 26#Chris and asexuality|mailbag]], Chris clarifies that he "[gets] an ERECTION when [he sees] WOMEN STRIPPING, or are already NAKED." The letter in question didn't actually ask whether or not Chris himself is asexual, but rather his opinion on asexual people.

==Pedophilia==
[[Image:ChrisChanDamageControl.jpg|thumb|right|250px|"I AM NOT A PEDOFORK, YOU DORKS!"]]
To avoid looking like a pedophile, Chris made an announcement before [[Sonichu 8|issue 8]] that he was changing the ages of the characters so they could all legally have sex (in Virginia, at least. The age of consent for most states is 16). While retconning a character's age is hardly unusual, it's obvious in this case that he did it just so his recolors could have sexual relations — after all, why else would he make such a big announcement about retconning anyway?

Although the Sonichu series was originally intended for children, he put a bunch of porn into issue 8. This included (but was not limited to) graphic depictions of Sonichu and Rosechu having sex, and multiple instances of Rosechu stripping naked. One of the most notorious sequences came near the end of episode 17, where Rosechu face-raped [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] to a near-death state after he taunted her by throwing a pickle at her. Also, towards the end of episode 17, an [[Zapina|anthropomorphic lightning bug]] exclaims "I've just turned 14-years cute!!!" and wishes to assist [[Rosechu]] in making porn for "[[women's rights]]." Rosechu says "I don't know child, what with the dumb laws." This quote is a good indicator that [[Pedofork|Chris believes the legal age should be lower.]] This belief was later confirmed in one of Chris's responses to [[troll|fan]] mail in [[Mailbag 3#Plush boobs and pedoforks|Mailbag 3]], where he states that if given the power, he would change the age of consent in America to "Sweet 16", making it "another good reason it would be a 'Sweet' age." He is obviously unaware that age of consent is controlled by the state, and most states already have it set at 16 or 17. But in Virginia, it's 18. He also believes that kids can participate in "adult" activities, like perverse satires with adult themes and making a porno, as long as there's adult supervision.

All of his attempts at a classified ad for himself always start with "I'm looking for an 18-2X boyfriend free girl…" At his age, being seen with a woman almost a decade younger than him would be considered socially unacceptable and downright creepy, based on the "half-your-age-plus-seven" tradition. Of course, Chris doesn't understand social mores regarding age differences, so to him, if she's legal and breathing, she's fit as a sexual partner. This, of course, may lead one to ask how low he'd go. If the legal age were, for example, 14, would he instead be saying "I'm looking for an 14-27 year old boyfriend-free girl…"?

In addition, Chris notoriously had sex with [[Kimmi]], an anime blow up doll that looks underage. He maintains that he stays straight by looking at a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]], which features said character and her 8 year old daughter from the future, and when he was editing his [[ED]] article in his favor, one of his accounts had underage porn featured prominently on the user page. Most of the underage porn from this user page, along with a few other pieces of pornographic art chosen by him (which, ironically enough, includes Pedobear… ''twice'') would reappear in the "elevator gag" in Sonichu #8. One might argue that because of his notoriously bad facial recognition, he might not realize how young they actually are. But as mentioned in the [[The Tale of the Crazy Pacer]], he is quite good at age recognition (a talent common among autistics). This obviously brings up many questions.

Chris also harbors a longing for 17-year-old [[Megan|Megan Griffin]] from [[Family Guy]], and even had a video in the favorites of his old YouTube account depicting her with inflatable breasts.{{cite}} His ED user page had a picture of her, proclaiming he would be more than willing to be her boyfriend. When he began to be harassed about being a pedophile, he changed it to say, "I'll be your boyfriend, 18-year-old Megan Griffin." Smooth, Chris. [[fail|''Reeeeeeal'' smooth]]. This took on a whole new level when he openly proclaimed a desire to have sex with Megan, though he kept himself in check enough to ask that the writers of Family Guy at least [[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|age her to 18 before he somehow has sex with her]].

To be fair, there is evidence to suggest that even Chris has '''some''' degree of an age limit. In one of [[Chris-chan Discusses...|Guru Larry's Interviews]] with him, Chris reacted in somewhat shock when Larry mentioned how another internet lolcow, [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Spax3 Spax3], allegedly has a crush on Cream the Rabbit, a six-year-old character from the [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] series. Now this shock could mean that he looks down on someone going after someone so young or it could just be shock that someone shares a [[Love Quest|common interest]] with him... In addition to his shock he stated that [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|bestiality]] is wrong, but of course he didn't mention the age factor. Whether this means Chris doesn't mind that or whether he's just an idiot (or [[For Julie's Eyes Only|both]]) is up for debate, but keep in mind his own original character [[Rosechu]] is based off [[Amy Rose]], another character from the Sonic the Hedgehog series, and one who is only twelve years old in canon.<ref>http://sonic.wikia.com/wiki/Amy_Rose</ref>

It's possible Chris only cares about getting his [[china]], and not so much how old it is. Then again, he doesn't ask for girls any older than him on his [[sign]], so clearly he [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|likes 'em young]], so to speak. But this also might be a throwback from his "old-fashioned" rearing, which demands that the woman must be younger.

==Bestiality==
{{quote|I can imagine myself doing it with a [[Patti-chan|collie]] at least. you know, like Lassie.|Chris in [[IRC (27 December 2008)]]}}

Some argue that he only said that so he could get to [[PandaHalo|Panda's]] sweet china. But still — dude would have sexual intercourse with a dog.

Chris is a notorious furry, as he has used his hedgehog fursona while cybering with [[Julie]].<ref>CWC Cums for a Cat</ref> In the [[Giant Penis Comic]], Chris and [[Ivy]] both morph into fursonas during the act of sex. Whether or not Chris can actually be considered a furry is still debated, with people arguing that he doesn't participate in the furry community, and probably only draws furry porn because he is a creature of habit and is more used to drawing furry porn than human porn. There have been [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|some]] [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg|exceptions]], but nearly all Rule 34s he has drawn depict some furry creatures having sex. He most likely doesn't know what a furry is. Another possible theory is, knowing the [[Chris and hypocrisy|level of maturity]] Chris displays every day, he's unable to mention the basic terms describing sexual action (see "china," "duck," etc.). For this [[Autism|retarded]] reason, the use of fursonas allows him to present sexual material while not really presenting anything.

In his [[Chris-chan Discusses...‎|interview with ScrewAttackEurope]], Chris says he's against bestiality, then hoists himself with his own petard by claiming that Sonichu & co. are not "half-humans" but "all-animals" with human form. Technically, this isn't bestiality. They're animals having sex with each other, not humans having sex with animals. Chris, however, is a man masturbating while drawing pictures of animals having sex with each other. That ain't normal.

==Prostitution==
{{quote|"In my sarch[sic] on Craigslist, the ONLY women who left a phone number on their Ad were under "Adult Services", which they would have wanted money. I tried calling one, learned she wanted a hundred, then in the middle of telling my story about Jack and my PSN account recovery with a Sex video, she hung up on me. :("|Chris, wasting a prostitute's time}}

While being blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]], Chris attempted to solicit the services of a Craigslist prostitute to fuck on camera so he could recover his hacked PlayStation Network accounts. After describing his personal problems to the prostitute, she hung up on him. Chris was apparently trying to get free sex from the hooker with long, rambling stories about his horrible life, unaware that prostitutes, by definition, only have sex with men for money.

Previously, [[Brian Bash]] had sent a trio of prostitutes to [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] so he would no longer be a Virgin with Rage. [[Hooker incident|Hilarity ensued]].

==Chris and rape==
{{Quote|I would appreciate it if I was FULLY UNDERSTOOD as the Noble Gentleman that I am.|Chris, a man that groped a [[Kacey|woman]] the first time he met her.}}
As Chris's sexual frustrations continue to build and build, some observers have raised the unsettling question of whether he might try to force himself on a woman. The possibility does seem real - his relationship with [[Megan Schroeder]] provides many examples of his inability to understand the importance of respecting physical boundaries and the simple fact that "no means no."

Thanks to his characteristic lack of empathy, Chris has almost no grasp on how emotional and physical intimacies develop in the real-world. [[Anime]] and porn have taught him all the wrong lessons — he assumes that sex is something that just happens, and usually sooner rather than later. He quite literally follows the saying "rape is how they say 'hello' in Japan". Being a retard, he assumes that not only is that true, but that it applies to Western culture as well. He took it as a given that Megan would put out if he won the [[PaRappa the Rapper]] contest and took her to [[Wikipedia:Seattle|Seattle]]. In his conversations with [[Vivian Gee]], he professed a belief that sex automatically happens after the [[third date]]. During his feud with [[CChanSonichuCWC]], he seemed to think that he’d be able to get some if he lured his rival's girlfriend [[Kacey]] to his house, and never mind that she'd probably be able to tell the difference between Chris and her ''real'' boyfriend. This is him again believing that everyone is as stupid and terrible with faces as he is.

Whether Chris understands rape as a concept is up for debate. He claims that he knows what rape is, but at the very least, his self-absorption and lack of empathy mean that he doesn't understand the gravity of rape, or its long-term consequences for the victim. It is possible that the only reason he knows anything about rape is through porn, where it isn't portrayed as bad, and the girl always ends up enjoying it in the end.

As stated above, Chris has claimed that in his ideal world, homosexuals would be ''"taken in and reprogrammed with multiple upon multiple pleasurable moments with female prison inmates and prosts[itutes]"''and that ''"prisons will no longer be divided between gender."'' It is unknown if Chris would obtain permission from the women before putting them to work "reprogramming" gay men, but the fact that he specifies prison inmates seems to imply that he doesn't expect the women to cooperate willingly. The fact that he believes prisons being co-ed would reduce the incidence of homosexuality shows that he is, on some level, aware that homosexual sex and rape occurs in prison, but he doesn't specify whether integration would allow men and women to have consensual relations or just shift the rape from male on male to male on female.

When [[IRC_(21_January_2009)|confronted with the news]] that his sweetheart [[PandaHalo]] had been raped by [[Clyde Cash]] and become pregnant as a result, Chris was easily distracted from the emotional impact of what had happened, and instead focused most of his attention on what kind of domestic arrangements would result, or whether he might have to forego his trip to Nintendo of America headquarters in order to pay for an abortion. His first reaction was to tell her that he wouldn't blame her or "hold it against [her]". Any woman assumes as long as her mate isn't a misogynistic asshole that he wouldn't blame her, and being "reassured" of such isn't exactly comforting or helpful. Chris was even willing to accept the mind-boggling possibility that Panda might want to live with Clyde, and raise her child alongside him.

While [[IRC (23 July 2009)|pretending to be a troll]] in an IRC conversation, Chris suggested twice that the trolls should instigate him to rape [[Rocky]]. What this says about Chris, be it that he actually wants to rape Rocky and then use the trolls as a convenient scapegoat ("They made me do it!"), or that he is particularly awful at bluffing, remains a mystery.

In [[Sonichu 10]], Chris reveals that he had traveled forward in time and, aside from finding the cure for homosexuality, he also meets his "future wife", whom he rapes. More specifically, she thinks that Christian is his future self (of course, seeing how rapidly Chris appears to be aging now that he's dealing with the [[stress]] of everyone on the internet hating him, that seems unlikely) and proceeds to invite him home for some sexing. Chris seems to think that there's nothing wrong with having sex with a woman if she thinks you're someone you're not. Chris falls back on the old standby, "if she didn't say no, it's not rape." Like his stance on [[Women's Rights]], where he maintains he's not a chauvinist because he'd never physically abuse a woman, Chris fails to realize that there's more to it than that.

In his video [[IPods Down and Listen Up]], Chis went as far as literally "singing" about sexual assault with him as the "star" rapist. The lyrics describe the victim as a "[[Niggos|sleek, sexy panther]]" whom he fails to ambush as she flees. Then [[Sonichu's Edge|he chases her]], wear her out and, in his own words, ''"...You take it like a gal (gal), and then we pump (pump-pump, pump) ..."'' until impregnation. Then he describes his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|bastard children]]. There's nothing more [[Hello, Juffalo|sickening than this]].

In the face all these foreboding implications, however, it helps to keep a few practical facts in mind. Chris is a [[Chris and health|physically decrepit]] coward with an incredibly low threshold of pain. If he ever attempted to assault a woman, he probably wouldn’t get very far. For the sake of all involved, anyway, let's hope so. This is assuming that he doesn't squash her first with his [[obesity|massive girth]], in which case, there would be a problem.

== TL;DR ==
Chris is about as straight as his [[duck]].

==See also==
*[[Homos]]
*[[Women's rights]]
*[[Semen]]
*[[Mass debating]]
*[[Duck]]
*[[Chris and his ego]]

==Sauce==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

1990s

2010-02-25T00:07:21Z

Steffigurke: -->1994 (Changed "does'nt" to "doesn't")

__NOEDITSECTION__
[[Image:0406-ChristianIs17-4.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in the nineties.]]
[[Image:0226-ChristianWMrsSanford.jpg|thumb|right|Chris and [[Mrs. Sanford]].]]
[[Image:0505-ChristianWLlamma.jpg|thumb|right|WTF [[Niggos|nigger]].]]

The '''1990s''' is the decade that marks the beginning of [[Chris]]'s obsession with [[Sonic]] and [[Pokémon]] which would one day lead to the abomination that is [[Sonichu]]. He also started using the interwebs in this decade.

==1990==
'''1990''' would be our problematic autistic's last year at [[Greene County Primary School]]. It is unknown why he left, and whether he got thrown out.

[[Image:0064-ChristianWSonic.jpg|thumb|right|Chris meets [[Sonic]].]]
[[Image:0047-ChristopherApr1991.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in '''1991'''.]]
[[Image:0067-Christian%26Barbie.jpg|thumb|right|Chris and Barbie. That little Sonic plushie would be featured again, decades later, in [[Kimmi|Christian's sex vid]].]]
[[Image:0224-ChristianOnABus.jpg|thumb|right|Chris wants to see the schoolbus.]]
[[Image:0086-Christmas95-1.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in '''1995'''.]]
[[Image:0105-MomRetire13.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in '''1996'''.]]
[[Image:0128-Christmas96-6.jpg|thumb|right|Christmas '''1996'''. Spoiled fuck.]]
[[Image:0242-CWC&VarsityBBallTeam97Color.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in '''1997'''. He had to water the niggos.]]
[[Image:0500-CWCAsh1.jpg|thumb|right|'''1999''', the Poké-madness breaks loose.]]
[[Image:0419-ChristianIs17-14.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in '''1999'''. This image is win.]]
[[Image:0502-CWCAsh3.jpg|thumb|right|Typical Chris pic from '''1999'''.]]

===Events of 1990===
* February 24 - Christopher's 8th birthday.
* June - Christopther becomes a fan of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] according to him.<ref>From the [[Sonichu]] article on [[CWCipedia]]</ref> This is, however, historically impossible.
* August/September - Chris enters third grade at [[Greene County Primary School]].

==1991==
'''1991''' would be a troublesome year for Christopher. He switched schools to [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], but had a conflict with the principal. Certain teachers also supposedly abused Chris, and the school's administration wanted Chris put in intense special education or in an "institution."

===Events of 1991===
* This year - Christopher is first introduced to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]].<ref>[[The Sonichu Chronicles]]</ref>
* February 24 - Christopher's 9th birthday.
* August/September - Chris enters fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]]. He soon develops a disliking towards the allegedly [[homos|homosexual]] principal of the school.
* This year - Chris is supposedly "abused" by the teachers at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]]. <ref>Based upon statements done by Christian in his [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]] video.</ref>
* This year - Christopher's father, [[Bob Chandler]], takes "abusive" teachers to court, but fails.<ref>Based upon statements done by Christian in his [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]] video.</ref>
* This year - Chris is removed from school and home-schooled.<ref>Based upon statements done by Christian in his [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]] video.</ref>

==1992==
In '''1992''', Chris was removed from Nathanael Greene Elementary School and became home-schooled. Also, to prevent Chris from being put in an institution or intensive special education, the Chandler family moved to [[Richmond]].

===Events of 1992===
* February 24 - Christopher's 10th birthday.
* August/September - Chris enters fourth grade. He is home-schooled.
* September - The Chandler family moves to [[Cloverleaf Lakes Apartments]] in Chesterfield County, Richmond, because they are afraid Chris will be "locked up in an institution." They keep their home in [[Ruckersville]].<ref>[[:Image:0078-CWCNote2.jpg]}</ref>

==1993==
In '''1993''', Chris started attending [[Providence Middle School]] in Richmond. He became more and more obsessed with Sonic the Hedgehog, even entering a Sonic contest.

===Events of 1993===
* February 24 - Christopher's 11th birthday.
* August/September - Chris starts attending Providence Middle School, entering the sixth grade.<ref>Based upon statements done by Christian in his [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]] video.</ref>
* September - The Chandler family moves to Chesterfield County.<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Memories of childhood|Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]], page 7. Also based upon statements done by Chris in [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]].</ref>
* Autumn - Chris enters the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]].<ref>As stated in the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]] video.</ref>
* November 20 - Chris gets Spiderman's autograph at the mall, and meets Mario.
<gallery>
Image:402-CWCsSpiderManCardFr.jpg
Image:403-CWCsSpiderManCardBa.jpg|Sweet! (Scrapbook)
Image:0066-Christian&Mario.jpg
Image:0068-ChristianSpiderMan.jpg
Image:0070-CWCsSpiderManCardBa.jpg|(DVD Slideshow)
</gallery>
* December 29 - [[IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES|An article]] in the Richmond Times-Dispatch discusses Chris, his name change, and the Sonic contest.<ref>[http://pqasb.pqarchiver.com/timesdispatch/access/615847621.html?dids=615847621:615847621&FMT=ABS&FMTS=ABS:FT&type=current&date=Dec+29,+1993&author=Barbara+Green&pub=Richmond+Times+-+Dispatch&desc=IT+TOOK+A+TALKING+BEAR+TO+GIVE+THE+NAME+A+YOUNG+BOY+LOVES&pqatl=google It took a talking bear to give a young boy loves], Barbara Green - Richmond Times</ref>

==1994==
In '''1994''', Chris pestered his parents into letting him change his name. He also won the Sonic contest.

===Events of 1994===
* Winter - Christopher [[Christopher's name change|changes his name]] to Christian.
* February 24 - Christian's 12th birthday.
* February 26 - Christian wins the Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes.<ref>[[:Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|Date on DVD cover.]]</ref>
**'''Sonichu canon''' - the Pichu who would become [[Sonichu]] evolves into Pikachu.
**First anniversary of the [[Twin Falling Towers|World Trade Center bombing]] that killed 6 people and injured over 1,000 more. Chris, being the stupid, insensitive bastard he is, [[Chris and reality|doesn't notice let alone know of the bombing that occurred the year before]].
* May 9 - The Case of Bob Chandler vs Greene County School Board is dismissed.<ref>From [http://208.210.219.132/stars/select.jsp Court of Appeals of Virginia Case Information]</ref>
* August/September - Christian enters the seventh grade at Providence Middle School.

==1995==
In '''1995''', Chris entered eighth grade at Providence Middle School.

===Events of 1995===
* February 24 - Christian's 13th birthday.
* August/September - Christian enters the eighth grade at Providence Middle School.
* Summer - The Chandler family moves out of Cloverleaf Lakes Apartments and into the [[Surrywood Subdivision]].<ref>[[:Image:0078-CWCNote2.jpg]]</ref>

==1996==
'''1996''' was a rather stressful year for Chris's parents. The neighbors of their new house in [[Newberry Towne Subdivision]] started spreading rumors about the Chandler family. This was rather hard for Bob and Barbara to bear. Christian himself didn't seem to mind the trouble too much, and started attending [[Manchester High School]].

===Events of 1996===
* February 24 - Christian's 14th birthday.
* Early - Barbara retires from Secretarial Services at [[Virginia (state)|Virginia]] Power.<ref>[[:Image:0078-CWCNote2.jpg]]</ref>
* Late Spring - Christian graduates from Providence Middle School on [[honor roll]].<ref>Based upon statements done by Christian in his [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]] video.</ref>
* Summer - The Chandler family moves out of the Surrywood Subdivision, and starts living in the [[Newberry Towne Subdivision]]. According to Chris, some of the neighbors spread rumors about his family.<ref>[[:Image:0078-CWCNote2.jpg]]</ref>
* September 1 - Christian begins his freshman year at [[Manchester High School]].<ref>Based upon statements done by Christian in his [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]] video.</ref>
* Autumn - Chris becomes a water boy for the varsity basketball team.
* November 13 - During basketball practice, Chris thinks up [[Bionic the Hedgehog]].

==1997==
In '''1997''', Chris is still studying happily at Manchester High School. He now also manages the school basketball team.

===Events of 1997===
* This year - Chris is rejected by [[Laura Dorazio]].
* February 24 - Christian's 15th birthday.
* June - Christian allegedly had a prophetic dream about Sonic the Hedgehog appearing on Game Boy.<ref>Claimed by Chris in his PowerPoint: [http://www.mediafire.com/?xe03yxe1zyp]</ref>
* August/September - Christian begins his sophomore year at Manchester High School.

==1998==
In '''1998''', Chris received an [[Honor roll|F]] in English class. This would hurt him severely, forcing him to create the [[Song of Christian]] in retribution. He also discovers [[masturbation]].

===Events of 1998===
* This year - Chris discovers masturbation <ref>[[Mass debating]]</ref>
* February 24 - Christian's 16th birthday.
* March - Chris starts volunteering as an assistant Gym Leader at [[Books-A-Million]].
* May 15 - [[Song of Christian]] released.<ref>[[:Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|Date on DVD cover.]]</ref>
* June - '''Sonichu canon''' - a Pikachu collides into Super Sonic to become Sonichu.
* June 4 - Christian makes his [[Chris's DVD#Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway Animation by C.W.C. on Game Boy Camera|Lego Raceway Animation]].<ref>[[:Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|Date on DVD cover.]]</ref>
* July 4 - '''Sonichu canon''' - Sonichu and Rosechu share their first kiss.
* August/September - Christian begins his junior year at Manchester High School.
* September 4 - Chris records a [[KCWC]] tape. [[Barbara]] "calls in" saying that she wants to request a song for Bob's 71st birthday, humoring him like he's six years old, when in reality, he was sixteen.
* November - '''Sonichu canon''' - Sonichu and Rosechu move to their house in Brunchville Lane in [[CWCville]], all paid by [[Monthly tugboat|government money]].

==1999==
In '''1999''', the [[Pokémon]] franchise became huge. During this time, Chris started making Pokémon-themed sites, and even got into the [[Chris's DVD#Chris Chan in the Pok'eNews|PokéNews]]. According to [[Lucas]], Chris started attending the [[Game Place]] round about this year.

===Events of 1999===
* February 24 - Christian's 17th birthday.
* April 25 - The domain for [[Sonichu.net|CWC's Pokésite 1]] in the pokemon community is reserved, by someone going by the name Starplayer, for use by Chris.<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/19990902144020/http://pokemon.acmecity.com/james/190/</ref>
* July 3 - Christian launches his first website. It is Pokémon-themed.<ref>Based upon the oldest posts in his guestbook (two congratulations by Christian's parents).</ref> Afterwards, he excitedly runs to his parents and demands that they sign the guestbook.
* July 29 - A friend signs Chris's guestbook and tells him that she hopes he continues learning HTML.
* August/September - Christian begins his senior year at Manchester High School.
* September 22 - Christian writes his own myth - "[[How the Pokemon came into Our Poke Balls]]". According to Chris, his English teacher thought it was great.<ref>See: [http://www.sonichuandrosechu.com/cwcspokesite2/intrstry.htm]</ref>
* September 30 - A friend, Mrs. Johnson, signs Chris's guestbook and says that she knows of "others" that would like his website and she will pass it on to them.
* October 13 - Christian launches the news section on his [[CWC's Pokésite 2|new Pokémon site]].<ref>See: [http://www.sonichuandrosechu.com/cwcspokesite2/goldpoke.htm]</ref>
* October 16 - Christian is featured in [[Chris's DVD#Chris Chan in the Pok'eNews|PokéNews]], dressed up as Ash.<ref>[[:Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|Date on DVD cover.]]</ref>
* October 30 - Christian publishes "How the Pokemon came into Our Poke Balls" on his [[CWC's Pokésite 2|Pokémon site]].<ref>See: [http://www.sonichuandrosechu.com/cwcspokesite2/intrstry.htm]</ref>

==References==
<references />

{{Timeline}}

[[Category:Chronology]]

Son-Chu

2010-02-24T22:54:38Z

Steffigurke: Added link to word china

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[Image:Chrischanscar.jpg|thumb|200px|When you see it, you'll ZAP TO THE EXTREME!]]
[[Image:License.jpg|Much like James Bond, Chris also has a license to kill (though through his ineptitude in operating a 3-ton mobile weapon)|thumb]]
'''Son-Chu''' (aka '''The Sonichu Mobile''') is Chris's [[1994]] [[Wikipedia:Ford Escort (North America)|Ford Escort]] [[Wikipedia:Station wagon|station wagon]].

While Chris, to put it mildly, obviously suffers from multiple ''disconcerting'' issues which are listed [[My Little Pony|elsewhere]] in this fine wiki, the Department of Motor Vehicles has nevertheless given him a full permission to drive a [[Sonichu Special 4|motor vehicle to be used in a plan to commit aggravated assault]]. DMV has yet to release an apology for this grievous lapse in judgment.

Members of PVCC believe that the fact that Chris drives a Ford Escort may be a universal symbol of romantic [[fail]].
Chris did not save up his [[Monthly Tugboat|tugboat]] for a vehicle, deciding on [[Little Big Planet|more important]] [[McDonalds|things]] [[Guitar Hero|to spend his money on]], despite the fact that sometimes a nice car equals [[china]]. Son-Chu is his mother, [[Barbara]]'s car.<ref>[[Mumble 10#Summary|Mumble 10]]</ref>
==Backstory==
Since Chris jerks off to [[Transformers]], he pretends that his car is a Transformer named Son-Chu, "Proud Autobot Leader of the Cwcville, Virginia Autobot Squad; he is also is my Cool Sportin', Escortin' Car."<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Son-Chu</ref> From the [[CWCipedia]]:

{{quotebox|My Car is the Quick-Footed, well-armored '94 Escort; his name is Son-Chu. Dark Blue as Vehicle; he holds BatteryBlue/Yellow Combination Colors and Strong Personality under his hood. He has his Plasma Pistol/Energon Sword and Roof-Shield, and when Decepti-Clones attack, he is the First to Show up to the Party and leading the Cwcville Autobot Defense Squad. When I'm not in the driver's seat, and he has to make his way to the fight, he projects my image in the Driver's Seat for the sake of his disguise.

Transformation Details: His Roof comes off his vehicle mode to make his Shield. His hood pops off to transform into his Plasma Pistol/Energon Sword.

**Stay Tuned to watch his Transformation in a few days.
}}

The reason why the car is named "Son-Chu" still remains unknown. The same can be said of all of Chris's other Transformers rip-offs, though.

==Handicap parking permit==
Being [[Autism|a high functioning autistic male]], Chris has also been granted a handicap parking permit, clearly visible in the photographs of the car.

Chris should be thanking his lucky stars that he lives in one of only two states (the other being New York) in which you can get a disabled permit for being autistic. Yes, Chris actually does take up spaces meant for people who are ''really'' disabled.

The biggest question is, of course, this: who needs handicap permits when he's got a giant robot? If he can't find parking space, he could just level the parking lot. ''Duh.''

==Dashboard==
A Homer Simpson figurine resides on Chris's dashboard. There also appears to be a Sonichu-related item, possibly a paper cutout stuck to an air freshener ([[Chris and health#Hygiene|to mask the hobo stank]]), hanging from his rear-view mirror. Interesting to note is that [http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+46.2-1054 Virginia law prohibits the suspension of distracting or view-obstructing objects from the rear-view mirror of a car], a fact which most Virginia driver's-ed programs make very clear.

==Vanity plate==

The [[Wikipedia:Vanity plate|plate]] reads "[[Sonichu (character)|SONICHU]]," thusly ensuring no back-seat poontang for Chris. Ever. This habit of having a family plate stems from family. [[Bob]] has a vanity plate reading UN4EVER (apparently a support for the UN) and IB MR C (I be Mr. C, as in [[IBAChandler|I be Mr. Chandler]]) and [[Barb]] has one named B WESTON (as in Barbara Weston){{cite}} Chris's plate is fashionably overlaid with a "PIEDMONT VA CC" frame.

==Bumper Stickers==
Chris's car features a number of ancient and faded bumper stickers. Odds are they were applied when he first received the car, and have been rotting on the bumper ever since. Bumper stickers have long been regarded as a means to relay one's ill-informed world-views and prominently display meaningless platitudes for the public view. Chris's choice in stickers is a prime example of typical bumper sticker fare.

From left to right:

* Sonichu window static - A nearly invisible, transparent overlay in the back window of Chris's car. Most of the text is too faded to decipher, but it contains the URL for the old tripod website, what appears to be a faded drawing of either Sonic or Sonichu, and a very faint rendering of the Sonichu title text. They seem similar to the [[:File:197-cwcsonstecrd.jpg|ads in]] [[:File:163-cwcsonstecrdver2.jpg|scrapbook]], but the logo is on the other side and the URL is bigger.
* [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] - A round red sticker. The remnants of Chris's ill-fated and ultimately useless attendance of the local community college.
* Plan 9 Music - A bumper sticker for a local record shop where Chris probably gets his [[Chris and music|used Britney Spears]] from.
* An American Flag - Incredibly faded and neglected. Text underneath the flag reads "United We Stand". Probably added in 2001, during a frenzy of patriotism.
* "Autism. Work For A Cure" - As always, Chris feels the need to advertise his disability to the world. The sticker is a paragon of failure. How is "Autism" a sentence? Do you think it can be "Cured" rather than treated? What are you doing to "Work For A Cure"? Why is "A" capitalized?
* "Come Play With Me!" - Currently, the most disturbing thing Chris has on his car. It is an advertisement for "[[The GAMe PLACe]]". I'm sure they appreciate his endorsment.
* ???? - There are the completely faded and torn remnants of a sticker located on the center of Chris's bumper. It unknown what resided he

Unsurprisingly, Chris's parents pay for his gas<ref>[[Mumble 10#Summary|Mumble 10]]</ref>.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Son-ChuVehicle.jpg|Side profile of the car. [[Honor roll]] my ass.
Image:0655-CWCsSonichuLicense.JPG|The vanity plate, IRL (notice the [[autism]] and [[The GAMe PLACe]] bumper stickers along with a [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]] license plate frame).
Image:VanityPlateComic.jpg|The vanity plate, as seen from the [[Sonichu (comic)|comic]]
Image:Son-ChuBot.jpg|The car in Transformer mode. Note how the mild-mannered Escort somehow grows the front end of a Dodge Viper.
Image:Playstation Patrol W CWC's Car.JPG| Chris parks his car outside of his version of [[PS3| Mecca]].
</gallery>
</center>

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia}}
*[[Hot Wheels]]

{{Relics of Fail}}

[[Category:Relics of Fail]]
[[Category:Transformers]]

Chris and the law

2010-02-21T20:49:59Z

Steffigurke: /* In the Comics */ (Typo correction)

[[Image:CWCCop.jpg|thumb|right|Chris aways [sic] keeps an eye out for [[Trolls|criminal]] [[ED|scum]] who would dare steal [[Sonichu]].]]

[[Chris]] has had several run-ins with '''the law'''.

==Law troubles==
On 20 [[July 2005]], Chris was charged with disorderly conduct and trespassing<ref name="Criminal Searches">[http://www.criminalsearches.com/details.aspx?id=w1x00xC8&vw=criminal&1=Wpem9DAEtHH%2fFwSXuzfStJ2LvpHgv1YXUU3kPiyr3%2fQ%3d&input=name CriminalSearches.com], which has the Virginia Administrative Office of the Courts as their source</ref> for stalking women at the mall and being a total tard, as depicted in [[Sub-Episode 1]]. After two hearings,<ref name="Criminal Searches" /><ref>[[MySpace#Lindsay]]</ref> he was not punished. Five days later, Chris followed a car too closely. This went to court on 12 September.<ref name="Criminal Searches" /> He was fined $30 and had to pay $56 in costs.

==Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws==
[[Image:AL cover.gif|thumb|Where Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws come from.]]
As he believes the police in real life are corrupt and sees them in the same light as he sees the [[jerkop]]s in his comic, Chris has his own spin on the law. The penalties for [[Alcohol|drinking]], [[Tobacky|smoking]] and [[troll|internet harassment]] involve physical violence including a "Kick in the Teeth" which Chris portrays as a punch in [[Captain's_Log%2C_Stardate_October_27th%2C_2008|the only one]] of his supposed series of Q&A videos.

On new years eve, 2009, Chris presented a nice babble about a law he wants made to prevent [[Jack Thaddeus]] from using adspace he paid for.

{{quote|I Have The Instinct, and I Have Already Snail-Mailed [[Barack Obama|President Barack Obama]] on how this sort of bad advertisement is going on and how it is Wrong and should be made Illegal. On HOW if the Main Captain does not WANT or IS OFFENDED with the listed Ads within his own Website or Works, REGARDLESS of who controls the AdSpace, WOULD REMOVE THOSE ADS or face JAILTIME. And the F.B.I. would be FULLY INVOLVED in all this, and THEY have the Power, Tools and Balls to seek, hunt down and bring in the Individual Internet Trolls and Ad-Spammers.|Chris, [[Chris and his Ego|Thinking he's important]]}}

Yes, you heard it right. Chris wants to ask [[niggo|the President of the United States]] to make [[Chris and Reality|advertisements he doesn't want illegal.]] From a practical standpoint, Cwcipedia is the only wiki that has a "Main Captain". This "Main Captain" does literally nothing to run or maintain the site at all. Furthermore, if someone paid for adspace, the host that received the money must allow the purchasing party to use said adspace for the allotted time, no matter what they advertise, or the host faces legal penalties. And last but not least, the President has better things to do than slap laws on Wikis.

This attitude is also reflected on his relationship with [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. [[2003|Years ago]], She interrupted Chris in what looked like [[Love Quest#Conflicts with Mary Lee Walsh|soliciting for sex]]. [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Hilarity ensued]] and Chris received some well-deserved [[Autism papers|time-out]] for [[Chris and anger|his antics]]. Fast-forward in [[2009]] when Chris, [[One Blessing, and One Curse|out of the blue]], decides to make peace. He went to her home and left her a [[:File:Apology_to_Mary_Lee.jpg|"Framed Hand-Drawn Apology"]] on her doorsteps. Knowing Chris's attitude, she filled a trespassing notice. In pure stalker logic, Chris said that since he didn't read the letter and returned it to the sender, [[Mailbag 26|he's not legally liable]].

[[Mailbag 55]] posits a few more original laws: one, that it should be illegal for men to ever show their bare chest (because, according to Chris, no one in the entire world ever wants to see a man's bare chest, no matter what shape he's in). He also wants to force all women in any kind of relationship to wear rings, thus defeating all symbolism and significance of them.

TL;DR Chris ignores the law when it's inconvenient, yet expects it to save the day when the [[Autism]] card doesn't work.

==Repealed!==
In his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video Chris announces that the [[CWCville]] prohibition has been repealed, and the first bar is opening up soon.

==Understanding==
[[Image:Impliedshooting.jpg|thumb|left|Chris implying guns are the answer.]]
Like his grip on [[Chris and reality|reality]], Chris's understanding of the law is tenuous at best. He regularly threatens trolls with legal action, and makes no distinction in severity between a troll threatening violence against Chris and a troll uploading a harmless picture of [[Rosechu]] with a [[pickle]] to the internet. As a matter of fact, Chris himself is prone to making [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|extremely violent threats]], such as threatening to murder [[Vivian]] and her entire family because of the [[audiobooks]]. He's done everything from calling the police to convincing his father to write to then-[[George W. Bush|President Bush]] in an attempt to get rid of his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page. He has even attempted ([[fail|poorly]]) to impersonate the President in a hilarious attempt to convince the trolls at ED to take down his page.<ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=prev&oldid=1997405266</ref> Chris also believes that the laws in [[CWCville]] and the laws stated in [[Mailbag 55]] should be enforced '''in real life.'''

Chris himself doesn't have much respect for laws and rules, at least when their enforcement inconveniences him. During his time at [[Get-Tar Region|Target]] he didn't see anything wrong with exploiting the free refill policy and loitering for hours at a time in a privately-owned establishment while harassing female customers and apparently [[Attraction Sign|soliciting sex]]. Chris feels that his [[Virgin with Rage|emotional state]] entirely justifies his actions at times, stating in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat|Vivian's AIM Chat]] that he should be excused for disturbing the peace by literally shouting "[[Excel Saga|NOOOOOOO!]]" loudly in the middle of a crowded mall during the events of [[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2: Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart"|Sub-episode 2]].

Self-contradictory to a fault, though, Chris is happy to meticulously follow some laws while ignoring others at the same time. In [[Sonichu Special 4]], his cartoon avatar makes a point of obeying the exact speed limit...while on his way to confront [[CChanSonichuCWC]] and commit assault with a deadly weapon upon him. Any intelligent and decent person could tell you which of these laws is more important, but Chris is neither intelligent nor decent.

In addition, Chris has very little respect for [[Jerkops|those who enforce the law]]:

{{quote|Verbal Combat had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Has.” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off. |Excerpt from Chris's [[CWC's Diary|diary]]}}

The above quote pretty much defines Chris's attitude towards law enforcement officials. He feels that it is completely appropriate to flip off, insult, lie to, and ''attempt to hit, with his car,'' people who are simply doing their jobs (although the tale may be exaggerated, it is nonetheless pretty damn awful). And, of course, as any rational person (i.e., anyone who's not Chris) would understand, running away from law enforcement officials is a seriously bad idea. Chris is truly a rebel without a cause or effect.

==In the Comics==
Chris's understanding of the law in his comics goes so far as to been seen as a mixture of childish tendencies and, some might say, dictatorial tendencies. In CWCville, Chris has banned a number of things in his city, as smoking or drinking alcohol would lead one to be either sentenced to 10 years in jail or a much more lenient $1500 USD fine. Even stranger is the the fact that the city tends to lack other races or even other sub-cultures, beyond Chris, the Sonichus and Rosechus, a handful of (white) males and females, and the few Transformers in his town, lead many to think that Chris has banned them as well. The Rosechus tend to fight for [[women's rights]], that is to say, the ability to strip naked whenever and wherever they want to. While it's pretty much fine and dandy in CWCville, they were most likely attempting to do this for across the US, which is pretty stupid to begin with.

As Mayor, Chris has been seen as a do-nothing Mayor, preferring to have [[Allison Amber|his secretary]] do all the work (as per his thoughts on women) while he goes off on another one of his sweetheart searches. He has mandated "Date Education" classes for students so that they can learn to go on dates, as well as how to "stay straight". Any sort of police force has yet to be actually seen, giving the impression that only Chris and his Pokemon abominations are the only thing standing in between peace and eternal virgins with rage. However, [[Sonichu 9]] seems to reveal that there is three sets of "other" protectors: a (possibly) nondescript police force, as well as his own team of [[Power Rangers]] and a team of [[Transformers]].

{{quote|Is CWCville under Martial Law? |[[Jack Thaddeus]] citing the truth as he sees it}}

It gets even more scarier; in a conversation that [[Jack thaddeus phone call 3|Chris had with Jack Thaddeus]], He reveals that CWCville is the home of a paramilitary force equipped with tanks he uses as a "Police Force" and all his Electric Pokemons have IMMUNITY FROM PROSECUTION and are over the law. If we add all this to the fact that there's no free elections in CWCville, this shows us the city in the hands of a dictator running it with a hand of steel and backed with super-powered goons freed to do any atrocity with impunity. Chris also plan to use Magi-Chan to mentally scan the city perimeters for any sexual acts. If the said relation is between homosexuals or between an adult and anyone under the age of 18, the participants would be [[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|"tried and fined HEAVILY; $500 or 50 Hours of Community Service"]]. This proves us that, in CWCville, the Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution do not applies in matters of personal sexual choices. This might put him at odds with [[Chris and sex#Pedophilia|his own sexual ideals...]]

In a strange [[Chris and hypocrisy|set of double standards]], Chris has been shown to injure, kill, or damage people and property ''outside of CWCVille''. [[Sonichu 10]] has shown no less than three grievous acts upon others: the destruction of the 4-cent_garbage building, the death of over 100 trolls in said destruction, breaking and entering [[Asperchu|Alec Benson Leary]]'s house, and destroying internet files and property.

==See also==
*[[Parody]]

==Sauces==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Chris and his ego

2010-02-21T05:21:54Z

Steffigurke: /* Monthly Tugboat */ (Formatting problem)

{{quote|Firstly, YOU WISH YOU WERE ME...|Chris, [[Mailbag_10#Rejected_Mailbag|Mailbag 10 (Rejected)]]}}

{{quote|For every one that exalteth himself shall be humbled; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.|[[Chris and religion|Luke 14:11 (English Revised Version)]], really hitting the nail on the head}}

'''Egotism''', out of all of Chris's flaws, is the most important and self-destructive. It is this egotism that may one day lead to someone playing [[Kick the Autistic]] for real.
[[Image:SchuComic0P44.jpg|thumb|'''egotism''', (noun): the belief that your pain (getting kicked out of the mall for being creepy) trumps all others (divorce and loss of beloved children)]]
==Origins==
Why is Chris such an egotist? In his sheltered childhood, his enabling parents taught him to shift blame for all of his troubles to other people. A sense of entitlement, again homegrown, skewed his perception of the proportionality between his problems and those of other people. Chris doesn't completely lack empathy; he isn't a sociopath, but the internal 'scale' by which he weighs the feelings of others is completely twisted. His autism compounded the problem by making it difficult for him to understand social cues and relate normally to his peers. He grew up in a different world.

But that explains why Chris ''was'' an egotist, ''struggled with'' egotism, or ''has tendencies towards'' egotism. While Chris's childhood was less than ideal, it shouldn't have been crippling. Time and experience should have helped temper his ego, but Chris's development appears to have completely stopped. Chris is still an egotist because he lives in a social time capsule that has allowed him to carry on for the better part of a decade without a single life lesson. And he still lives in that time capsule because it is easy, it is comfortable, and people let him.

===The Enablers===
[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|Exhibit A]]
{{quote|He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.|Proverbs 13:24}}
Chris's parents are enablers ''par excellence''. There is no earthly reason why (barring unrelated catastrophes) an almost 30-year-old with autism should live at home with his parents, especially one as "high functioning" as Chris's activity and his documentation show him to be. Adults with far more crippling mental health problems (from emotional disorders to mental retardation) live more independently than Chris does, whether alone, alone with supervision, or in group homes.

For children like Chris, public school special education is generally geared toward helping the child understand how their disorder affects their lives, and what strategies they can use to minimize its impact. This is a well-documented and well-supported strategy, but it relies on "buy-in." Chris's parents clearly never bought into the strategies, because they never fostered any interest in independence in Chris, thus undermining the entire regimen of special education and ending up with a man-child with entitlement issues.

===Monthly Tugboat===
{{Main|Chris and Money}}
Regardless of whether Chris is abusing the welfare system, his parents are abusing it through him, or the system itself is flawed, the fact remains that the [[monthly tugboat]] is a major factor in making Chris's lifestyle—and thus his worldview—sustainable.

===Blind Luck and the Cherry Picking Fallacy===
[[Image:SlamAttack.jpg|thumb|Local Boy Levels Up]]
[[Image:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg|thumb|left|Article in PVCC's ''Forum'']]
[[Image:Famewhore.jpg|thumb|McIntire Park]]
A [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes|contest]] or [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|two]] here; a [[Chris Chan in the PokéNews|two-second local TV blip]] there. The results are that outside events most people never experience have stroked Chris's already monstrous ego.

Consider that Chris has produced a ''huge'' volume of fanmail, letters-to-the-editor, internet commentary, and other drivel. Each letter to Nintendo is a message in a bottle: most of them never return, but the one that does—on an official letterhead, and addressed to Mr. C. W. Chandler—is confirmation of his celebrity.<ref>[[An Official Sonichu Update]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Yeah...it says here that, uh, yeah...they—th—it goes on to say that:

:"Nintendo of America has some of the most devoted, enthusiastic fans of any game developer. Each week, they receive, uh, hundreds of thousands of suggestions about their games and systems. While they would love to, uh, use ideas from f—fa—from fans to develop actual products, due to the volume of the, uh, requests they receive and the resources it would take to process them, they do not accept unsolicited game or product ideas. But they are committed to being at the leading edge of game and hardware development, though, and they can be sure that they are constantly at work developing new and exciting products and game ideas."

Now, uh, here's the interesting part...where they quote about how I can actually...go further about ch—about them changing their minds and actually accepting the idea and helping me, uh, makin' it—makin' it totally real...with the video games and the TV animations and the action figures, and...officially-released—my personally-approved...medals... ''[...]'' they say that, uh, the best way to let other fans know about my idea or to generate hype about the future game I'd like to see is to post the ideas to the forums on their sites.}} 

As if Chris didn't think his material was golden to begin with, he got a second nod from ''Nintendo Power'' for his epic [[Animal Crossing Documentary]], and a page in [[PVCC]]'s ''Forum'' as icing on the cake. Even before his e-fame, Chris had plenty of evidence to convince himself that he ''was'' creative, and not just a high-volume, whiny jerk that had pestered his way to acknowledgment. As he graduated from [[PVCC]] in 2006, his writing shows that [[Sonichu]] was, in his mind, already tested: there was just some small threshold of notoriety or connections that needed to be breached, in order to become a true media sensation.

On top of that, Chris has a huge amount of free time to inject himself into situations like the [[McIntire Park]] meetings, which allows him to cherry-pick more moments of recognition. A tongue-in-cheek acknowledgment by the local council seems cute to us, but is serious business to him. And since Chris cherry-picks only the reinforcement that he wants, his legions of [[troll]]s just add to the fire. Delusion has led him to believe that he has a legion of fans; a few hundred emails in his inbox confirm it.

==Manifestations==

Chris's egotism manifests itself in many ways.

===Unwarranted Self-Importance===
[[Image:Apology_to_Mary_Lee.jpg|thumb|Very gracious.]]
:''See also: [[True and Loyal Fanbase]]''
{{quote|I have had way over a million fans worldwide since I went online in before 2000.|-Chris, [[Mailbag 48]]}}
As overwhelming as Chris's unwarranted self-importance is, it's easy for the novice observer to get lost in the sea of ''Sonichu'' shit and assume that he's just confident in his e-fame. "Of course," you say, "he's got a billion hits on YouTube and a thousand emails in his mailbox. He's going to think he's hot shit, like every other retard on the [[DeviantArt|internet]]."

But nothing sums up Chris's deep and abiding USI like this missive to [[Mary Lee Walsh]]:<ref>[[Mary Lee Walsh#Emails with Mary|Emails with Mary]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Mary, I've slept on it, and I have realized that note-hanging is not the way to get attention. And I don't really want to meet with either you nor Susan, no offense. I'll tell you what, let's forget the meeting, and if you will allow my newsletter to stay in distribution, I will do all of the following:

*I will never hang notes on the wall again.
*I'll consider stopping my Silent Treatment on Susan.
*I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my scale of Respect each by 2 points (0=No Respect...10=Respect).

Please reply via E-Mail.

Christian C.}}

E-fame just adds a whole new dimension. He was a misunderstood genius before; now he's a misunderstood genius with a [[personal army]].

{{quote|III'M. WOR-KIN'. ON IT! LET ME DO THAT STUPID VIDEO SO I CAN TELL [[True and Loyal Fanbase|E'RRYBODY, IN MY COMMAND]], TO GET EVERYTHIN'- HELP ME GET EVERYTHIN' OFF THE INTERNET!|Chris, [[THAT IS MY HOUSE]]}}

It's so bad now that when Chris meets someone new who claims not to know who he is, he seems skeptical and surprised.<ref>Exchange with the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]], [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Meet the Pickle .2801:21:44 - 01:25:29.29|Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

{{quote|Y'all should know me by now, but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, back on March 17th, 2000.|Chris, in his [[CWC's Second Message|second YouTube video]]}}

The instant-gratification, instant-acknowledgment, and instant-attention—good or bad—that has come with his minor e-fame of the last few years has thoroughly convinced Chris that people ''do'' read everything he writes, and that his YouTube messages ''invariably'' get to his target audience.

===Persecution Complex===
[[Image:Issue4.jpg|thumb|Saint CWC the Martyr.]]

Chris has a lot of problems, and even the ones he [[lie|'takes responsibility for']] are still out of his hands.

*His [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|school]] was mean to him.
*He didn't deserve that [[Song of Christian|F in English]].
*Or the one in [[CADD Chef|CADD]].

And if that wasn't enough, he thinks every authority figure in the land is conspiring against his [[Love Quest]]:

{{quote|Then in Mid-October, the Quote/Unquote "Dean of Student Services," Mary Lee Walsh, approached me and pulled my sign away from me and told me, "You're NOT ALLOWED TO FIND TRUE LOVE HERE." MY HEART WAS SHATTERED that very moment.|Chris, on his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Enter_the_Wicked_Witch_of_the_Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens|Wikipedia Page]]}}

It doesn't help that he's engaged in a quagmire of a war against the [[homo]] rumors that those [[Trolls|DAMNED TROLLS]] keep spreading about him, with a second front versus the [[Chris and copyright|copyright]] violating [[Liquid Chris|thieves]].

{{quote|It's out of my control! I don't know where to go! I DUNNO KNOW WHERE TA GO!|Chris, [[THAT IS MY HOUSE]]}}

It has never—and likely ''will'' never—occurred to him that he needs to go ''outside'', get a job, and get off the damned internet.

===Naïveté===
Chris's simple-mindedness and gullibility are legendary. The man is like the Sith: he only deals in absolutes. Either you're with him or you're a [[troll]]. This has been very obvious in his answers to the [[Mailbag]], where he refuses to listen to any talk—even from professionals—about the similarities between [[Asperger Syndrome]] and [[autism]], denies that there are any shortcomings in his [[Sonichu (comic)|work]], and shrugs off any advice about how to improve his health or appearance, labelling anyone who suggests he has any kind of shortcoming a troll.

Chris equates [[honesty]] with divulging every last detail about his life. Nothing is too candid for Chris - getting haircuts, drinking his own [[navy]], even giving away his phone number and home address! The only thing he hasn't done with wild abandon is give away his social security number and when that happens, it probably won't be a surprise to anybody.

His gullibility is astounding. No matter how many times it's happened before, Chris is easily led around by trolls promising [[china]] or threatening [[Sonichu]]. The earlier trolling schemes, such as [[Blanca]], [[PandaHalo]] and [[Jimmy Hill]], got Chris to jump through hoops and exposed so much information about Chris and his personality that [[Cwcki|they had to start a wiki to keep track of it all]].

===Hubris: The Pride Before the Fall===
[[Image:NeitherOfUs.jpg|thumb|It's fair to say that Chris is a narcissist.]]
{{quote|I'd say... I'd say I'm all around. You see, the problem is that I have too many skills that I am good at. You might say that I am a jack of all trades and a master of none.|Chris, [[Mumble 3|right about that last part]]}}
Numerous times, Chris has shown that he believes he has powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal [[slow-in-the-minds|autistics]]. In fact, this attitude has transcended self-confidence and erupted into full-blown hubris: Chris is convinced that his [[Chris and writing|writing]], [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|musical]] [[Guitar Hero|talents]], and [[Chris and art|art]] are not just competitive with his peers, but clearly superior.

And he doesn't just have the power to create: his is also the power to destroy. This line of thinking is exemplified by Chris's acceptance that [[Ryan Cash]] committed suicide just because he withheld ''Sonichu'' updates, and would worsen when he believed that his [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]] actually caused [[Liquid Chris]] to have some sort of horror befall him.

But those are just the most insane moments of cognitive dissonance. What about the time he went into hysterics when he didn't get a recognition for his art?

{{quote|I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt crestfallen greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!|Chris, on his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Graduation|Wikipedia page]]}}

Or his reaction to losing the [[Adam Stackhouse|Parappa Contest]]?

{{quote|So that SWORN ON MY AUTISM, JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED TO THE SEVEN PEOPLE OF THOSE FOUR VIDEOS!!!!|Chris, on the [http://web.archive.org/web/20070830114517/http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm Sonichu Site]}}
[[Image:How chris sees himself.jpg|thumb]]
All of the above is consistent with the behavior of small children, who, isolated from the real world by a lack of comprehension and limited mobility, believe themselves to be godlike beings. This belief is gradually destroyed as the child goes to school and encounters outside authority, leading to their acknowledgment of the fact that they are, in fact, ordinary people. Of course, since Chris is not only autistic but also extremely sheltered, he still manages to cling to this belief by focusing on specific aspects of his life and constructing [[CWCville|elaborate fantasy worlds]]. This is also probably why he sees mundane chores as horrific trials of strength and will. In psychological terms, this can be referred to as 'psychological neoteny,' which is basically the retention of juvenile traits well into physical maturity.

Also consistent with his childlike mindset is his apparent belief that he has supernatural powers. In Freudian terms, this is referred to as 'omnipotence of thought'. Basically, Chris cherry-picks elements of his life in order to validate his fantasy of control, which is more systematically displayed in the Sonichu comics. Taking this into consideration, it's likely that Magi-chan is yet another Mary Sue for Chris (which adds more fuel to certain theories), serving as a kind of avatar for his desire for authority. Why he felt it necessary to make another character to fill this role is unclear, considering he's already established [[Chris-chan Sonichu|himself]] as the one true God of [[CWCville]].

===Materialism===

{{quote|I want Julie! Yeah, love is my first priority, but then- but then I want my stuff back!|Chris, caring more about his precious PSN Account and Sonichu website, more than his [[troll|sweetheart]].}}

It is clear that Chris is a materialist (a common symptom of Narcissism), buying large amounts of crap that make him feel good about himself, and by some twisted form of reality make him think that his unhealthy amount of children toys might attract a [[sweetheart]], when in reality any human being would clearly see that this man is [[Naïve|delusional]].

==War against the ego==
One of the main forces opposing Chris's ego are the [[white knights]]. These [[slow-in-the-minds|misguided souls]] have attempted to get Chris to understand that what he's doing is ridiculous and that he needs to grow up. Instead, he brushed them all aside, assuring himself that he was [[Honest Content|TRUE and HONEST]], and could do no wrong. One of the more popular white knights, [[Vivian Gee]], became a troll when she couldn't get through to Chris.

When asked to get real, psychiatric help, Chris has said that his church counselor, [[Rocky Shoemaker]], is enough for him, and that she could do so much more than someone with ''an actual degree in that field.'' He seems to believe that because her title includes the word "counselor," she is every bit as qualified as a real doctor (the fact that most pastoral counselors see people for free probably helps as well, since Chris would never spend part of his precious [[monthly tugboat]] on something useful when there are [[video games]] to buy).

==Examples of Chris's Ego in the Real World and in the Comic==
[[Image:SchuComic8P68.jpg|thumb|250px|[[Jiggliami]] sums it up nicely]]
{{Main|Examples of Chris's Ego}}
{{clear}}
==References==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Jason Kendrick Howell message

2010-02-19T21:36:47Z

Steffigurke: /* Transcript */ Chris actually said "beyond the wall", not "up the wall"

<center>{{#ev:youtube|k-ZWM4nlaB8}}</center>
'''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD''' is [[Chris]]'s infantile, yet to-the-point, threat to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after the hacking of [[Sonichu.net]] which was initially pinned on Jason, when the mastermind was [[Clyde Cash|someone]] far more nefarious.

Some argue Chris is actually saying "I'll ''pray'' you dead" which Chris did in fact ask the [[Sonichu Girls]] to do, to pray for the death of Jason Kendrick Howell. However, Chris begging [[GodJesus]] to smite his enemies is not as funny as Chris tard raging and snapping (or attempting to) Jason in half.

[[Image:ILLBREAKYOUDEAD.jpg|thumb|Original e-mail with text of Chris's threat to Jason]]

[[Image:ChrisBreakYouDead.jpg|center]]

[[Image:SonichuBreakYouDead.jpg|center]]

==Transcript==
''Answering Machine:'' One saved message

Jason Kendrick Howell... 
You BASTARD! 
You ''BASTARD!'' 
You hacked into everything! You have driven me so [[Chris and English|beyond]] the wall, I can't even describe it! 
You're laughing now, but 
{{RageQuote|I'll BREAK YOU DEAD!}}
Goodbye!

==See also==
*[[Death threats]]

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?jgoz109zwym The audio recording]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category: CWC-isms]]