CWCki - User contributions [en]

A Workout

2010-11-09T14:35:05Z

Svek: removed speculation as to how many calories Chris burned. BTW, it was probably more than 32.

'''A Workout''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 19 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris appears to have stuffed his [[muscle bra]] again and performs [[Chris_and_health#Exercise|a workout routine]] to "Ass 'N' Titties" by [[Wikipedia:DJ Assault|DJ Assault]], specifically a [[YouTube]] video which includes dancing by various ''World of Warcraft'' characters.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Workout
| video = {{#ev:youtube|_2PMKRwgAEw}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = VA Red Cross Blood Donor, {{Cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[Pregnant Act#The Remake|Pregnant Act]]
| next = [[SonichuBabies]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
'''''0:00-0:10''' Video starts with Chris putting on Ass 'n' Titties by DJ Assault. Chris faces the camera with his stuffed [[Muscle_bra|muscle bra]] and starts [[Fail|exercising]] by punching spastically in time to the beats. ''

'''''0:11-0:24''' He then begins doing his version of jumping jacks.''

'''''0:25-0:59''' Chris starts swaying his hips from side to side before doing several [[CWC_Fighter|Chun Li kicks]]. He noticeably begins to slow down here but continues on and adds spastic punches as well.''

'''''1:00-1:27''' He starts twisting side to side with stuffed muscle bra in full view. [[Slow_in_the_minds|Chris loses the beat]] of the track at this point.''

'''''1:28-1:54''' Next up he starts stretching his arms to the ground and back up. Though he speeds up again for a few seconds, he goes back to slow relatively quickly.''

'''''1:55-2:11''' Chris starts stretching his arms down each arm individually.''

'''''2:12-2:19''' Here he stretches out his back with his [[Obesity|fat autistic gut]] on display.''

'''''2:20-2:43''' Next he begins twisting side to side again momentarily before doing jumping jacks again with poor posture.''

'''''2:44-3:05''' Begins punching again, taking a brief look at his screen. Starts punching side to side.''

'''''3:06-3:23''' Chris twists side to side again, this time with his arms open and being twice as slow as the rhythm.''

'''''3:24-3:29''' Punches upwards and then back forwards. Music stops. Chris faces the camera and gropes his own man tits.''

Feel her boobies!

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 12 Second Power Workout With Christian Weston Chandler
| video = {{#ev:youtube|EJNtY52H2Oc}}
| Maker = ChristopherCooler
| Stardate = 19 October 2010
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan is Loco-Motion
| video = {{#ev:youtube|QkEG1t2botM}}
| Maker = DrNurse
| Stardate = 19 [[October 2010]]
| Video Type = Workout Video
}}

==See also==
*[[CWC Fighter]]
*[[11042009 51 50‎|51 50]]
*[[30 Push-Ups]]
*[[Power]]
*[[I AM STRONG]]

==External link==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJ5-iZYHBEc The video in the background]
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Pregnant Act#The Remake|Pregnant Act]]|nextlink=[[SonichuBabies]]}}
{{Videos}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Clyde Cash

2010-11-09T14:30:26Z

Svek: That quote is not needed and retarded. How about sticking to things that Chris has actually said about Clyde?

[[Image:TheRealClydeCash.jpg|thumb|left|The real Clyde Cash, [[Secret Weapon|according to Chris]].]]
[[Image:ChrisVSClyde.JPG|thumb|Artist's interpretation of this epic struggle.]]
[[Image:325504 - Chris-chan clyde cash.jpg|thumb|[[Homos|STRAIGHT]] ANGER]]

{{quote|Yer butt's gonna be in trouble|[[Barbara Chandler]] on Clyde Cash<ref>[[Hooker incident#Aftermath|The Hooker Incident]]</ref>}}
{{quote|I'LL STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH!|[[Chris]] on Clyde Cash<ref>[[CWC Update!!!!! 27 March 2009]]</ref>}}

'''Clyde Cash''' (alias '''Gregg Mays''' - that's [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 8th, 2009|Gregg with three g's]]) ([[Wikipedia:Born on the Fourth of July|4 July]] [[Wikipedia:1976|1976]]) was the older brother of [[Ryan Cash]] who decided to take vengeance against Chris after his brother killed himself. He is the leader of [[The Miscreants]] and owns the honorary title as most notorious of Chris's trolls. His close friend is [[Bryan Bash]], he once employed [[The Man in the Pickle Suit]] (Jew variety) and his cousin is [[Vivian Gee]].

In Chris's revised [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page, Clyde is referred to as a '''Starscream troll'''. This is a reference to the [[Transformers]] character Starscream, who would often switch sides or plot to overthrow [[Megatron]] behind the scenes. Chris says this [[Chris and Reality|because he believes]] Clyde allegedly killed [[BlueSpike]].

==In the beginning==

For the longest time Clyde had no problems with Chris. Although he disapproved of some of the content, he was pleased to see the joy the franchise had brought his brother Ryan. Every night before bed Clyde would read Ryan the latest [[Sonichu]] adventure, until Ryan had dozed off to sleep (usually with the first three pages).

This changed when Chris announced, in his usual knee-jerk fashion, that he was going to stop drawing Sonichu [[comic]]s. Clyde tried comforting the upset Ryan to no avail. On the 24th of December Clyde entered Ryan's bedroom, intending to share a tray of freshly baked gingerbread men, only to find the lifeless form of his brother swinging from a light fixture. The dark silhouette of his body threw ghostly shadows across the room.

On the desk Clyde found a note - apparently the pain of not knowing whether [[Crystal]] would be released from the Dark Hole Mirror was too much for the young Ryan to bear. Clyde screamed but no sounds would come out. Collapsing to the floor, he swore undying revenge on Christian Weston Chandler.
{{clear}}

==The torment begins==
[[Image:ClydesDriverlicense.jpg|thumb|left|Virginia: No longer for virgins]]
[[Image:Clydecashandannamclerran.jpg|thumb|Clyde Cash steals [[Anna McLerran|moar womenz]]]]

Clyde's first act was to rape [[Panda]]<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref> but it did absolutely nothing to Chris as he simply moved onto the next [[gal-pal]].

Then, Clyde [[Gregg Mays E-mails|posed as Gregg Mays]] (a web designer working for [[Nintendo]]) to gain access to [[Sonichu.net]]. Holding the site for ransom, he told Chris to make a video proclaiming he was gay. He then told him to make a [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 12th, 2009|video declaring his straightness]]. Eventually, Chris regained access to the site. Striking again, Clyde worked with a [[troll]] and got rid of the domain. Chris, being resilient, bought Sonichu.info. With the help of Panda, Clyde managed to gain access again.

It was around this time that [[Takashi Tezuka]] and [[Jay Z]] were doing their ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' game project. Clyde then decided to make things more interesting and posed as [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] to destroy any chance of the project. Teaming up with [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]], they created the [[Miyamoto Saga]].

[[Julie]] set up a [[Mumble]] chat in which Chris could communicate with [[Trolls|TRUE and HONEST Sonichu fans]]. Clyde stalked Julie while infiltrating these chats to confront Chris. He began throwing demands to Chris such as [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 10th, 2009|cleaning his room]]. Chris at the same time also bought SonichuandRosechu.com. Clyde got access yet again, this time with the help of Julie. In the end, it was revealed that Julie was a 13 year old boy and that Clyde had staged the whole thing.

After that, he sent out his trusted [[Man in the Pickle Suit|Jew friend]] to scout out Chris's whereabouts. The Jew turned [[Robert Simmons V]] into a troll and infiltrated the church. He then stole Chris's one and only date, [[Emily]].

When [[Ivy]] came along, he decided to continually harass her and despite Chris making a few threats, Ivy eventually gave in and killed herself.

Oh, and Clyde also hacked into the [[PSN]] a few times. But then [[Jack Thaddeus]] did him one better...

And to think all this was done due to Chris not caring about one fan's tragic suicide.

On 22 [[May 2009]], a body of Clyde Cash was reportedly found with a head gunshot wound, lying next to a shotgun. The incident was deemed a suicide, althrough some suspected a foul play.
{{clear}}

==In the comic==
[[File:Cly.jpg|thumb|left|"Cly" in [[Sonichu Special 1]]]]
[[Image:ClydeJackGay.JPG|thumb|Artist's depiction of Clyde and Jack's final moments]]

In the [[comic]] Cly(de) is a villain working for [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. Apart from capturing [[Ivy]] and getting into a fight with Chris, he initially only appeared on [[CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero]], officially [[Sonichu Special 1]]. Not much is known about Clyde, other than he lives in a mansion and owns a pickle gun and "slander ray."

He made his first full appearance in [[Sonichu 10]] as the 4-cent_garbage building is collapsing. When [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] escapes, he condemns him and [[Jack Thaddeus]] for being [[homo]] trolls. When Beel escapes, he, too, condemns the two for their actions, saying that being homo trolls that are "slandering and tarnishing a innocent man's good name" is just as evil as being an assistant for Adolf Hitler. With no option left, Clyde and Jack jump into the 66+6 story elevator shaft to their suicidal deaths.
{{Clear}}

== Currently ==
[[Image:GaySpiderMan.jpg|thumb|left|Clyde Cash and his buddy [[Jack Thaddeus]].]]
[[File:ClydeandLovelyweather.jpg|thumb|Clyde with [[The Wallflower]].]]

After Clyde faked his death for reasons unknown, he came back with a vengeance. Chris is not very pleased.

When not battling [[Liquid Chris]] for the hand of [[Kacey]], Chris spends his time trying to convince Clyde Cash, alias Gregg Mays (or "Gregg Mays, alias Clyde Cash," depending on which name he remembers first) to face him in one on one battle. Chris has recorded several feats of strength through a combination of Kacey trying to get him to get into [[obesity|shape]] and a desire to frighten Clyde with his [[Chris and Health|bulging muscles]].

He had a picture to blackmail Clyde, but ultimately nothing came of it other than a series of videos where Chris tries to torture Clyde.<Ref>[[ClydeGoingOnGregg1]], [[Clyde's Buddy Matt Getting SUPER-LAID!!!]], [[Clyde is Weaker than Water]], [[Getting Foam Ed]], [[Twin Falling Towers]], [[It will never end]] and [[Apology for 9/11 Joke]]</ref> Clyde scoffed at the [[No More Jokes|final video]].

However, because of the negative reaction to [[Sonichu Special 4]], Chris, in the [[CWCipedia]] mailbag, makes clear that he would only sit and talk cooperatively with Clyde to get him to stop harassing him.
[[File:Chriscash.jpg|thumb|left|Chris's bizarre attempt to [[100 2267|impersonate Clyde]]]]
Eventually, Chris decided to revisit his old nemesis, believing he was the reason why he lost "[[The Wallflower]]". In it, he is shown fighting Clyde, then pulling a [[knife]] and [[Don't Mess With Me|slitting Clyde's throat]] as a [[Death threats|warning]] to all [[trolls]].

In another well-thought counter-trolling plan, Christian unsuccessfully [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|attempted to scam Clyde]] into paying Chris over 9000 dollars for destroying his own [[PS3]]. This almost fail-proof scheme was however foiled, thanks to [[Surfshack Tito]]'s vigilance.
{{clear}}

==Fan videos==
{{collapsible
|Clyde Cash fan videos
|
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-chan Loves Clyde Cash
| video = {{#ev:youtube|73jIxs5yQLg}}
| Stardate = 17 April 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/CWCvillelulz CWCvillelulz]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info = It's a love/hate relationship.
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan KILLED Clyde Cash (Never Before Seen Footage)
| video = {{#ev:youtube|FiTVga0G8Ws}}
| Stardate = 7 June 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/TheClydeCash TheClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Particle Chan
| video = {{#ev:youtube|NrhdImejktI}}
| Stardate = 1 July 2009
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/PodMonkeyCWC PodMonkeyCWC]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Shit Was So Cash!
| video = {{#ev:youtube|32XiZC2yG1Y}}
| Stardate = 25 April 2010
| Maker = Psycatalyst
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
}}

==See also==
{{Fan art}}
*[[A CWC Audition]]
*[[(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise]]

==Sauces==
<references />
==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/TheGreggMays Gregg's YouTube account]
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?jmmyzlznhfa Post-date conversations] (part with Clyde begins at about 4:35)
*[http://en.tackfilm.se/?id=1263141624839RA18 An International Tribute to Teh Graet Clyde Cash]

{{Clyde Saga}}
{{Trolls}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Cash, Clyde}}
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

WeighIn

2010-11-08T22:28:45Z

Svek: It's fucking model magic, if he wanted tape he could have gone to wal-mart and paid 5 dollars for 5 rolls!

'''WeighIn''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 25 [[October 2010]], in which Chris, to the surprise of us all, steps on a scale to weigh himself. The scale gives a weight of 216 lb (15 st 6 lb / 98 kg). This weight marks him as [[obesity|obese]] for a man of his height (5'10", or 175cm).[http://www.nhlbisupport.com/bmi_scripts/bmi_udaim.pl?htf=5&hti=10&wt=216&scale=english&submit_e=Submit]

It is also revealed that Chris is wearing blue Crayola Model Magic around the bridge of his [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]]. The reason behind this is unknown.

== Video ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = WeighIn
| video = {{#ev:youtube|og-3s0n91Ys}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = {{RedBlueShirt|text}}
| previous = [[DayOut#At_Least_My_Face_Is_Not_F3c7ing_Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange ]]
| next = [[FullHouse]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Towelrack.jpg|thumb|One explanation why Chris weighs less than 300 lbs]]

Here is the official weigh-in on Sunday, September twenty- [[October 2010|October 24th 2010]].

[''Aims camera, jerkily, at scale readout.'']

If I can stay still long enough.

Hmmm.

Anyway it says 216.

[''Speaks into the camera again. His [[Glasses|glasses]] are now on his face and the bridge appears to be wrapped in tape.'']

Currently I'm 216 pounds.

{{videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[DayOut]]|nextlink=[[FullHouse]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Wigwam

2010-11-08T22:24:48Z

Svek:

'''Wigwam''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 25 [[October 2010]]. Chris, summoning his [[Cherokian Clan|Native American]] [[racism|heritage]], pretends to smoke [[tobacky]], nearly four years after [[Chris and hypocrisy|he proclaimed that he would shoot every last ounce of it to the Moon.]] Looks like he [[fail]]ed to [[Dreams#The acid factory dream|heed Godbear's warning]].

== Video ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Wigwam
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XvgT2J6WgvE}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlueShirt|text}}
| previous = [[PlayingHouse]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:CWC_Pipe_Stem_with_black_ink.jpg|thumb|100px|A five-pack of CWC-brand tobacky.]]
[''Chris makes weird noises, takes a puff from a ballpoint pen attached to a small sack, makes more weird noises, then hands it to the viewer.'']

[''In a stereotypical Native American accent''] Here, smoke um peace pipe, find inner peace!
{{clear}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[PlayingHouse]]|nextlink=[[DayOut]]}}

{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
[[Category:Outdoor videos]]

Talk:Punchy Sonichu

2010-11-08T22:20:17Z

Svek:

Isn't Punchy supposed to be Chinese?--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 14:13, 8 November 2010 (PST)
* ...As opposed to Asian? [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 14:16, 8 November 2010 (PST)
::As opposed to Japanese. Because of all the Japanese text.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 14:20, 8 November 2010 (PST)

Talk:Punchy Sonichu

2010-11-08T22:13:39Z

Svek: Created page with "Isn't Punchy supposed to be Chinese?--~~~~"

Isn't Punchy supposed to be Chinese?--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 14:13, 8 November 2010 (PST)

Tobacky

2010-11-08T22:12:33Z

Svek: The quote is enough on its own, no need to explain "Chris fails at astro-physics"

[[File:100 0695.JPG|thumb|NO SMOKING and [[Love Quest|WANT WOMAN!]] - two of Chris's [[Cherokee|war cries]]]]
[[Image:Tobacco.jpg|thumb|left|A [[niggo]] harvests some tobacky.]]

'''Tobacky''', also known as '''tobacco''', is an agricultural product that contains a powerful stimulant and is commonly smoked to deliver a smooth, easy taste, which people like [[Chris]] complain about, but a little-known fact is that it can also be snuffed (snorted like cocaine), or chewed and comically spat in nostalgic '70s/'80s baseball movies.

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] hates tobacky almost as much as he hates [[homos]]. If he could, he would send every last ounce of tobacky on a rocket to the [[The Moon|''motherfucking moon'']].

One of the prerequisites for a [[sweetheart]] that Chris has never veered from is that his TRUE sweetheart be "smoke-free", or rather a non-smoker like himself. Strangely, despite being a ''[[Family Guy]]'' fan, he fails to understand Lois Griffin's sage wisdom: "If she smokes, she [[hanky panky|pokes]]."

However, he would probably just [[Chris's Big Night Out|throw his morals out]] if a sexy [[galpal]] offered him a smoke.
{{clear}}

==Chris on tobacky==
In an [[ED]] edit from 10 November [[2007]], Chris said:
{{quote|He [Chris] also talks about how he wants to take every ounce of "tobacky" (said that way, because he felt uncomfortable saying the actual fucking word) and shoot it to the moon.}}

In his [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008|Q&A video]], Chris stated that tobacco and alcohol importation is the most severe crime in [[CWCville]] and warrants "ten years or fifteen hundred dollar fine." In short, importing cigarettes is apparently worse than rape, theft, murder, or even being a homo in CWCville.

In an [[IRC (02 January 2009)|IRC chat]] from 02 [[January 2009]], Chris explains why the moon and not the sun:
{{quote|I have given thought of sending the tobacco to the Sun, but then the smell from all that would likely emit from the giant star and stink up our Galaxy, possibly shortening the lifespan not only around our world, but the other 8 planets as well.|Chris, IRC, 02 Jan 2009, 12:17}}

==Chris and Marijuana==
Chris seems to have an even stronger hatred for Cannabis, despite it being hailed as an [http://www.autismsupportnetwork.com/news/autism-treatment-marijuana-madness-8763721 Autism treatment], he still holds on to the idea that it is even worse than tobacky because in CWCville, cigarette smokers are only given a $1,500 fine, but even those who simply possess weed are sentenced to [[Book10Replacement|Maximum Security Prison]], where they usually end up cellmates with [[Mary Lee Walsh|terrorist leaders]].

== So, did he stay committed to never smoking the stuff? ==
[[Wigwam|Nope]], looks like Chris [[Dreams#The acid factory dream|failed to heed godbear's warning]].

==See also==
*[[Alcohol]]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]

JuggaloShoutOut

2010-11-08T22:09:36Z

Svek: Not every article needs a reaction image!

'''JuggaloShoutOut''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris keeps on the facepaint from his [[DivineTrial|earlier video]] while giving a "shout out" to fellow [[wikipedia:Insane Clown Posse|Insane Clown Posse]] fans who refer to themselves as [[Wikipedia:Juggalo|juggalos]]. They are known for having many idiotic douchebags among their fanbase, which fits Chris's description perfectly.

Chris also recites a lyric from [[wikipedia:Coolio|Coolio]]'s [[(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise|"Gangsta's Paradise"]].
{{-}}

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = JuggaloShoutOut
| video = {{#ev:youtube|sG1Wpp1NEm8}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}
| previous = [[DivineTrial]]
| next = [[HairDifference]]
}}

===Transcript===

[[File:Fucking_Autistics.jpg|right|thumb|200px|[[Monthly tugboat|They don't.]] ]]
''[Chris is still wearing the facepaint and [[plush breasts]] he used during the [[DivineTrial]] video, although he has lost the red sheet of construction paper over his crotch.]''

Also, another thing.

''[Chris breaks into song.]''

We will do this gangsta's paradise! Da da da da, da, da da da. Da da da da da, da da da.

''[Chris leans into the camera.]''

Always be a member of the Juggalo family! We Juggalos roll.

== See also ==
*[[Hello, Juffalo]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[DivineTrial]]|nextlink=[[HairDifference]]}}

{{Music Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

DrainedCreativity

2010-11-08T22:08:42Z

Svek: removed link to Nirvana song

'''DrainedCreativity''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris bemoans the trolls for draining his creativity. This video could be a logical explanation on why there's a shortage of Sonichu comics, if we didn't already know it's because Chris is horrendously lazy.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = DrainedCreativity
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XttDWIHMEdM}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Rage|Anger}}
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Book10Replacement]]
| next = [[DivineTrial]]
}}

===Transcript===

Well, you trolls and [[Clyde Cash]]… I hope you all are happy.

''[Chris performs a dramatic glasses removal.]''

You quit— you put me down so much then, belittle my— belittle my [[Chris and copyright|creativity]] and my [[Chris and art|artistic capabilities]]. Pretty much made me sca— pretty much made me nearly scared to draw and think creatively. You drained me! You DRAINED ME, you damned idiots. Sons of bitches.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Book10Replacement]]|nextlink=[[DivineTrial]]}}

{{Troll Videos}}

{{Clyde Saga}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

SpaghettiRoutine

2010-11-08T22:06:41Z

Svek: removed reaction image

'''SpaghettiRoutine''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris mimes the preparation of spaghetti. He had planned to actually cook some spaghetti in his [[Chris's kitchen|kitchen]], but [[Barb|his mother]] had cluttered up the stove. Chris then presents the finished dish served on a paper plate and rubs his face in it. As he wipes the sauce from his face, he makes a reference to an orange-faced [[Clyde Cash|Cashy type person]] he knows.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = SpaghettiRoutine
| video = {{#ev:youtube|IZe8iAvUDMs}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Home Cooking}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Comedy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[ShowerClean2]]
| next = [[WelcometoBollywood]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[Image:Chefboyardee.jpg|thumb|right|Thank goodness for Chris's [[TRUE and HONEST]] Special Recipe.]]
For this presentation, I was going to make some spaghetti, live in the kitchen. But unfortunately, I don't have access to stove 'cause mama put a whole bunch of crap in the way. So, I am going to mime it. [''Mimes picking up a pot.''] Here's the pot. [''Wipes down the imaginary stove and mimes putting the pot on the burner.''] Put it on the stove. [''Mimes turning on the stove.''] Set it to the boiling temperature. ''Gestures upwards, making a sound that imitates steam rushing up, before tapping imaginary keys/buttons to his right.'' Boop-boop-boop-boop! Ah, in time the water's boiling. So we take the pot of spaghetti noodles...[''Mimics something unidentifiable.''] And...[''Hissing noises, wild gestures.''] Click click click click click click! [''Stirring motions. Adopts a baby voice.''] Noodles, smell so good! [''Lifts pretend noodles as if on a spoon.''] Mm, hey look at that. Drippy, no snippy! [?] [''Holds them close to the camera.''] I offer you some don—some non drippy! [?] But it's hot right now, so you might wanna wait a while. [''More hissing, more stirring.''] Yeah, I say our noodles are done. [''More imaginary knob turning. Chris motions as if holding a fishing rod.''] Hey, we pour—we drain the water out. [''Does so, and sets “pot” down.''] We get some plate-we get some plates. [''Mimes getting plates down.''] Oh wait a minute...we're serving two! [''In light of this epiphany, Chris tosses the excess plates away and makes shattering sounds.''] Heh heh! I'm just kiddin'. [''More gesturing, seems to be serving spaghetti.''] Fork. [''Mimes scraping pot.''] We don't want any noodles left behind! We'll rinse that out later!

In the meantime, here's a good jar of marinara sauce. [''Produces imaginary sauce. Unscrews it with unnecessary groaning noises, then a pop sound to indicate the jar coming off.''] There we go, I popped the seal! [''Pours it.''] Bloop-bloop-bloop-bloop...and now some grated mozzarella! [''Sings while caressing the mozzarella.''] I gotta pop this seal. Bloop-bloop...[''Shakes it over the food.''] And we'll add other spices...from my father's collection, which includes rosemary, garlic, parsley, whatever. [''More “unsealing”, more “shaking.”'']

And you can make your own meatballs with uh, processed meat and... put it all on a tray or something, let me throw it in, rolling it all into balls. But [[CWC - Hand Drawn Original|they end up not so good]], not as good, are they? So, what about we did, what if you buy your own meatballs? We had this pot-we had this package of Swedish meatballs, cook it in the microwave alread- so they're warming up already. [''Opens a package of imaginary meatballs, does something unidentifiable to them, and appears to dump them all over the “table.”''] And in the end, I'll wa-I'll at least...we'll have a few plates, you get somethin'...like this! [''Turns the camera to focus on a plate of real spaghetti and meatballs on a paper plate. Zooms in an out on it.''] Yummy, yummy, delicious!

[''Focuses back on himself. Goes back to the baby voice.''] So now we can sit down and eat our spaghetti. It is so delicious. [''Stirs the plate of real spaghetti with a plastic fork.''] Mmm...it smells so good! [''Holds a forkful up to the camera.''] You want a bite? Look at this, you want a bite? Mm, very good, num. You better take a bite, because you know what? Watch this- watch this- you watchin'? [''Chris mashes his face into the spaghetti like a child and takes several disgusting bites, then emerges with sauce on his nose and chin. Holds out his arms and smiles like he did something worth praising.''] Ta-da! [''Laughs. Wipes his face with a paper towel.''] I'm just kiddin'. I wouldn't do that to you for real life, huh-huh. It's fun. Hey, at least my head's not fuckin' orange. Like a certain...[''Wipes nose some more'']...Cashey type person I know. [''Turns camera off.'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ShowerClean2]]|nextlink=[[WelcometoBollywood]]}}

{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

A Public Announcement for Congress

2010-11-08T22:04:32Z

Svek: deleted bullshit about CWC's spanish

[[File:CWCforprez2012.jpg|thumb|300px|Today [[CWCville]], tommorow [[America]]!]]

'''A Public Announcement for Congress''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]]. The "for Congress" part apparently represents some confusion or misconception, because the video actually consists of a stump speech directed at the American people, outlining the policies Chris would advance if he were president.

== Summary ==

Chris offers a number of initiatives that would give [[Monthly tugboat|free money]] to [[Bob Chandler|senior]] [[Barbara Chandler|citizens]] and [[Inos|the homeless]], while also proposing that taxes be slashed to half of their current rates. In addition, he suggests that all guns should go to the [[jerkops|police]], and the citizenry could only be armed in case of an attack by [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|another nation]] or [[Chris and reality|another planet]].

Though he's billed himself before as a "moderate," most of his prescriptions come from the extremes of the political spectrum: a massive welfare state (extreme left), massive tax cuts (extreme right), confiscation of all firearms (extreme in any case). His stance on gay rights is reasonably moderate, though. [[Homos|Gay people]] would be accepted in his [[CWCVille|Utopian society]], so long as he didn't have to notice that they exist.

In yet [[Twin Falling Towers|another display]] of Chris's patriotism, he calls the [[United States of America|United States]] the United Nations, and refers to it as a city. Whether this is him wanting to expand his control to other nations or a legitimate mistake is unknown.

Chris also refers to the Internet as a wireless entity, believing that his tiny WiFi access point has the power to beam his videos to the entire planet.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Public Announcement for Congress
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ghfoOqS2mM8}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Politics}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = VA Red Cross Blood Donor
| previous = [[Vitameatavegamin]]
| next = [[Pregnant Act#The Remake|Pregnant Act]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[Image:Dope1.jpg|thumb|CWC [[2008]]]]

Good evening, friends. As your presidential candidate, I will now state how I feel [''Chris makes an odd kicking motion.''], what we can do to improve this, [[United States of America|these nations, these states]]. For one thing, we got so many [[Inos|poor people out on the streets]]. I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have soup beds. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS! So that there would be a bed for every homeless person until they can get back up on their own feet. Also, lower taxes. I will propose lower taxes, and we shall not have to pay so much. Five percent is okay, but why not two point five percent? And we will not cut off any benefits for the old people. They are good. And we shall give them plenty of money so they can afford the medications and services to keep them alive, because we do not pay for when we are sick, we pay for our [[Chris and health|good health!]] And we only pay after we're healthy. We're in good health. We pay to stay alive, we do not pay to die.

And, speaking of which, too much [[Sonichu 10|violence]] goes on within these city streets. I will propose only gun distribution to the official authority, which shall be the post-, which shall be within the [[Jerkops|police departments]]. Nowhere else. And all guns owned by locals, community people, shall be taken away. At least the bullets. When the bullets are necessary, or when there is an outbreak of violence from another [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|nation]] or [[Chris and reality|planet]], then we shall issue the bullets. At all-, at free stations, to be opened immediately. Otherwise we'll send in our special troops. Our [[Chaotic Combo|special force]].

[''A long pause, where Chris becomes visibly agitated.'']

And also [''another pause''], we will be okay to have the gays [''He noticeably grimaces.''] within our community, we will be okay to have the gays within our community. In all states! There will be gay marriage ability for every state within the [[Fail|United Nations]]. I mean, keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody, 'cause mup- the- mag- [[Family Guy|what may be right for you, may not be right for most. For some. You take the good from the bad and then you get an opening statement like mine.]]

People need to appreciate life, so we will not have to face death. [[Autism|I lost my train of thought there]], but that's okay. I am only human! We are all human! I am a noble, [[honest]] person. No matter what e'erbody else may say, even on the Internet, and my opponent, [[Clyde Cash|Señor Cachez de Clyyyyde]]. He tells liiies about me! And so do the trolls that have be-trolled me over the Internet. Their jeers, and non-cheers, do not go appreciated. Because it is not everybody who can take a joke. Even when it's at their own expense.

And with that, I will propose Internet securities, reinforced by the FBI, and there will be patrol stations of the Trollbusters around these United States. Any repor-, any troll activity that you may be suspicious of an individual, you report to your local authority! And they will tell, and then they will inform the local FBI station within that state. And then they will investigate thoroughly! Over the wireless that is called the Internet! And they will [[Wikipedia:Simple_Mail_Transfer_Protocol#Security_and_spamming|trace the e-mails back to the origin home address or location]]. And they will be apprehended and fined or sentenced, depending on how CRUEL they are to the [[Alec|victim]].

I stand strong, I stand firm, I AM A NOBLE LEADER! And if I am elected, I will do my best to keep our America strong and sound, and not go down the drain. I'm sorry, [[Obama]], I did vote for you, but [[:File:SchuComic9Page19-C.jpg|I gotta agree with my father]], you are bringing us, somuss- some of the situations downhill. But I have nothing against you because I did vote for you. And I liked your documentary on A&E. I would shake your hand at the first opportunity I would to meet you, Mr. President.

And thou- er- fore, I shall conclude my opening statement. In the candisacy of the president, I say, I will do my best! And I am not lazy! Thank you.

This ad is not real. I'm not being, going to be elected president, but I tell the truth nonetheless of what I would do if I were to become president. Thank you.

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan Political Ad
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8ojhq6qnBrE}}
| Maker = DrNurse
| Stardate = 19 October 2010
| Video Type = PSA
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Vitameatavegamin]]|nextlink=[[Pregnant Act#The Remake|Pregnant Act]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

CWCki:General

2010-11-05T15:27:13Z

Svek: /* The Chris and... articles need a complete overhaul (Next project to improve) */

__NEWSECTIONLINK__

{{Community Portal}}

*[[CWCki:General/Archive 1|Archive 1]]

For discussion that doesn't fit into the other community pages - though do keep it related to the CWCki.

== Da update is used for Chris updates...but what about other updates? ==
For example, I don't think the Lucas video game pictures should be on the update, but it should be noteworthy. Should it placed in da update or no? Also if you're wondering what pictures, I'M WORKING ON IT. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 21:33, 9 September 2010 (PDT)
:Where should I stick the pictures? I uploaded them with Lucas commentary on them. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 12:42, 10 September 2010 (PDT)
::I think either the list of Chris's games article or the video games article. Leaning towards the video games article, if only because the list article is already pretty damned huge. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 14:07, 10 September 2010 (PDT)

== Image purge project ==
According to the Spongepedia (also hosted by dreamhost), 500 internal server error may be caused by TOO MANY IMAGES. In any case, I'm sick of seeing shitty images that do nothing to enhance articles as well. please tag images that are useless on their talk pages for deletion. kthx [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 20:45, 10 September 2010 (PDT)
*Based on what you told me about the Spongebob wiki, their problem was also due to image size. Perhaps if we work on resizing images down to less than 30kb?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 13:34, 11 September 2010 (PDT)
::Eh, the 500 errors are a configuration/setup issue. I highly doubt images are the root cause. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 13:44, 11 September 2010 (PDT)
:::No, it's a general agreed consensus that the 500 internal server error is occurring more often nowadays. It has to do with an increasing amount of SOMETHING. I'm going by this only lead right now. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 19:09, 11 September 2010 (PDT)
::::I mostly get 500 errors on pages that are large - that is - the body of text is large. Images really seem to have a negligible effect on whether a page 500's for me or not. We should think carefully about whether going about an image purge will largely be a wasted effort and/or do more harm than good towards error fixing (generating more edits - which may also form part of the problem). --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 20:06, 11 September 2010 (PDT)

== Overlooked interview? ==

A couple of weeks ago, I noticed on the talk page for [[Chris-chan_Discusses...]], the subject of a previous interview was brought up, and Champ said he didn't want to put it on until they had a youtube version for it. A year later, someone did. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uR_PrPHC2l0 The video doesn't have many views, and I don't believe it has an article for it. I'm not sure if any of this is relevant, but I wanted to draw attention to it in case it needs an article or some other mention.--[[User:Austin|Austin]] 06:03, 11 September 2010 (PDT)
*This is the [[Christian Weston Chandler Interview]], that video is just a mirror. --[[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]] 15:05, 7 October 2010 (PDT)

== Chris and diligence article? ==

Christian's work ethics and his laziness are rightfully infamous, but there isn't an article dealing with it en detail. I'd make it myself but due to stress and my poor grasp of English I'd rather hear the opinions of others on it before making a crappy attempt. --[[User:Maximilian Graves|Maximilian Graves]] 07:58, 15 September 2010 (PDT)
** Strangely enough, I was thinking the same thing. Though with how lazy he is, the article would probably grow to be almost as large as the article on sex. [[User:Melainia|Melainia]] 21:04, 15 September 2010 (EST)

== My response to the site administrator. ==

Just a few days ago, a member of our forums decided to claim that we were involved in attacks on your wiki. We were notified by the administrator of your site on a locked topic supposedly thanking us for our actions placed on PSPownsYou (or PBML) and also requested action on another supposed participant named Level1isbest. I just want to point out that we have no intention of harming your site and that the involved parties are a bunch of fucking trolls, but then again every person on Newgrounds does it for the lulz, not including school shootings (Jeff Weise). Sorry for any inconvienence. [[User:Tateos|Tateos]] 16:25, 15 September 2010 (PDT)

==Chris and Morality Page==

Though his morality has been mentioned on several other pages, I think it would be best to have one page dedicated to his morality, or lack there-of, and where it comes from, mainly his ego. [[User:Melainia|Melainia]] 21:07, 15 September 2010 (EST)
: Frankly, if it's coming from his ego, it should be mentioned on the [[ego]] page. This is, however, unless there's enough to justify a major Chris and page.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 20:37, 15 September 2010 (PDT)
:: I don't really think Chris's morality needs its own page, as it would end up being a documentation of all the times he's been a horrible person (huge list), and all of the reasons behind it (troll speculation). These issues are already covered rather in depth on Chris's own page, the White Knighting page, the pages on Chris's Lies, Things Chris Has Ripped Off, Women's Rights, Homos etc. I feel a page purely about what a bad person he is is redundant (and self-evident besides). [[User:Sygerrik|Sygerrik]] 09:46, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

== so i did some spring cleaning today. ==
http://www.mediafire.com/?q6dsbzkgteqxpp6 - and then i realized it was autumn. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 17:44, 18 September 2010 (PDT)

:Does the great Clyde wish for these to be uploaded to their appropriate articles? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 22:49, 18 September 2010 (PDT)

::No, I want them to stay in this link forever and never be posted on the CWCki. Ever. EVER. This is the reason why I posted on the CWCki, to ensure that would happen. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 01:50, 19 September 2010 (PDT)

I was doing some spring cleaning too, little cuz! I was going through my emails and then suddenly i stumbled upon this pic of CWC that WallFlower gave to me awhile back! As The Ancient Hawaiians used to say: A clean coconut is a clean soul. http://img7.imageshack.us/img7/7886/cwcinkilt.jpg [[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 17:58, 18 September 2010 (PDT)

:lol at the Marge Simpson poster - [[User:Captainhowdy|Captainhowdy]] 19:23, 18 September 2010 (PDT)

== Tugboat icon I made for Donations ==

[[File:Tugboat_donate_icon.png]] Enjoy!
[[User:Shiny|Shiny]] 13:31, 23 September 2010 (PDT)
*Include your CWCki username with your donation and you'll receive a SPECIAL, LIMITED EDITION user box for your page and you'll receive a "si a pretty cool guy" quote from yours truly. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:23, 23 September 2010 (PDT)

So hey, I wanted to donate some shinies but my PayPal only gives out my dox rather than my CWCki username. I'll set up a new PayPal account in a bit. Gmail's the best way to go about it, right? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 03:26, 4 October 2010 (PDT)

== Faithfulness ==
Is there an article on Chris and his faithfulness to his "sweethearts", cause I was just skimming through Sonichu 10 where he claims Blanca is his true and honest sweetheart, but he's married in the future to Lovely Weather and slept with her, not to mention Meg? And that's probably not the only example one could think of. --[[User:SerenityMoonstone|SerenityMoonstone]] 22:31, 29 September 2010 (EST)
*Just about every Sweetheart article showcases how unfaithful Chris is.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 15:32, 30 September 2010 (PDT)

== getting rid of the fan works section ==
it's just a drag on our servers. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 21:54, 1 October 2010 (PDT)
:if anyone wants to argue against deleting the fan works section, speak up now plz. hurry! [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 20:32, 2 October 2010 (PDT)
::If it'll keep away the server errors then tear it down, burn the remains, and salt the earth. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 22:03, 2 October 2010 (PDT)
:::The section is bullshit that should have been killed months ago. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam & Eggs]] 19:26, 4 October 2010 (PDT)
Wasn't there plans for a wiki dedicated to fanworks? Whatever happened to that? For that matter, why is the fanworks section still up at all? Cogsdev wanted it trimmed several months ago.--[[User:Austin|Austin]] 00:41, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
:http://789chan.org/cxc/ [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 01:12, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
Can you give us an idea for an exact date for the deletion? I'd like to go through and save everything. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 20:22, 4 October 2010 (PDT)
:I'll save it all in a zip file. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 20:24, 4 October 2010 (PDT)

There's hardly anything left that's worth keeping. I say go for it.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 20:44, 4 October 2010 (PDT)
:Dunno guys, [[Fan:Choose Your Own Adventure|this for example]] is ace and I'll miss it. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 01:59, 5 October 2010 (PDT)
::If there's anything worth keeping it's that, [[Fan:Chris Gets Laid|Chris Gets Laid]], and [[Fan:Asperchu|the Asperchu fan page]]. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam & Eggs]] 17:09, 8 October 2010 (PDT)

In that case, move the Mailbag References page out of the Fan category. --[[User:AntonImaus|AntonImaus]] 03:56, 5 October 2010 (PDT)

:As I mentioned on the fan discussion (In case nobody read it) It would be an affront to not have any backups of the stories here. I finished up my story (Silent CWCville) so save the stories, redistribute them throughout the internet. And tell me where they'll be moved. Thanks. --[[User:Radiant Price|Radiant Price]] 16:44, 5 October 2010 (PDT)

If it's going to be saved and taken elsewhere, I say nuke it.--[[User:Austin|Austin]] 21:15, 5 October 2010 (PDT)

Just do it! people can use /cwc/ to post their creepy fantasies --[[User:GOTDANG|GOTDANG]] 06:31, 6 October 2010 (PDT)

Yeah,if you're gonna save it I'm all up for the deletion. --[[User:Bealtespip122|Bealtespip122]] 13:03, 8 October 2010 (PDT)

Everything has been saved on the cwcki spec forums by the admin there so away this section goes. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 10:04, 15 October 2010 (PDT)
Blow it up --[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 22:23, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

==Posting Kacey's Encounters with Chris==
Does anyone else feel that we should make a page with [http://pastebin.com/8FxWDZq6 Kacey's encounters with Chris] here? I mean, we reference it enough, and I think it's causing some confusion. Unless, of course, you feel that showing that Kacey was trolling him would be more confusing. [[user:Melainia|Melainia]] 12:20, 6 October 2010 (EST)
:That information is unsubstantiated. [[User:Canine|Canine]] 21:30, 5 October 2010 (PDT)
::Oh, true, I just wanted to ask. [[user:melainia|Melainia]] 12:53, 6 October 2010 (EST)
:I'm not so sure...Some of the information sounds feasable, And if I recall correctly during one of their final chats Kacey mentioned an IRL encounter with him. But at the moment I don't want for us to take any risks...Is it possible we can get a confirmation from Liquid? --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 00:56, 6 October 2010 (EST)
::I do remember the sniffing incident being mentioned during the Father Call, and Chris did admit to touching her a lot. [[User:Melainia|Melainia]] 1:00, 6 October 2010 (EST)
:::liquid doesn't give a shit about this anymore. just let sleeping dogs lie with him. just forget about this stuff, we'll get the real story one day. maybe. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 22:08, 5 October 2010 (PDT)

==Need CWC E-Mail==

I'm looking to pull the wool over good ol' CWC's eyes via The 4Hoursemen project (details will be revealed later) but if it goes out the way i plan lulz will ensue but for these things to fall into play i need some way to talk to him.Would his youtube account work or will he not even respond on that? [[User:The 4horsemen project|The 4horsemen project]] 17:07, 6 October 2010 (PDT)
*Sign your posts. It's just four ~'s.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 16:40, 6 October 2010 (PDT)
*It's damn near impossible to get into contact with Chris. You'd have an easier time picking fly shit out of pepper while wearing boxing gloves. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 17:11, 6 October 2010 (PDT)
*CWCki really isn't the place to launch trolling and if you can't find Chris's e-mail, then you probably shouldn't be trolling him.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:17, 6 October 2010 (PDT)

*Oh i've found his e-mail but the fat bastard wont respond to me.Maybe i should find a diffrent approach... [[User:The 4horsemen project|The 4horsemen project]] 17:28, 6 October 2010 (PDT)

==Mental Stability==

So how's the mental stability on cristian?In his latest videos he seems a little more crazy then befor.

Sign your posts and take this to the speculation page.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 09:45, 7 October 2010 (PDT)

== List of Appearances ==

[[User:General Rock|General Rock]] suggested that we have an article compiling all of the places where Chris has doodled Sonichu where it was totally unnecessary. From that drawing on the snow to his [[resume]], I'm sure we can come up with an exhaustive list. Thoughts? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 19:00, 10 October 2010 (PDT)
*He's 'fixated' on Sonichu; it happens with autistic people pretty often. [[User:BlueSpork|the infamous Blue Spork]] 00:39, 20 October 2010 (PDT)

== New template ==

{{Template:Cosplay videos}}

Did I forget something? --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 04:39, 12 October 2010 (PDT)

I think Chris dressing in a kilt and pretending to be Scottish counts as cosplay. I can't remember the exact video. [[User:MissRadioactive|MissRadioactive]] 05:24, 12 October 2010 (PDT)

* Nevermind. Found it. [[Tito_Got_No_Luck_Against_We_Brits,_Irish_and_Scots!]] [[User:MissRadioactive|MissRadioactive]] 05:45, 12 October 2010 (PDT)

== I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! ==

I was just re-watching some of the audiobooks, and came to an obvious but hilarious conclusion; our fearless leader has no clue how many people there are on earth (or is too [[Slow_in_the_mind]] to understand high school level math).

As I am a new user (Hi btw), and my Wiki skills are sub-par at best, I figured I'd prostrate myself before the CWCki masters before I made a n00b-ish page.

Here is a short greatest-hits list of Chris' math fails:

-In Episode 14 he (speaking through one of his characters) mentioned he sometimes detests 99.9999999999996% of the worldwide male population, not including himself and 'those within the margin of error.'

That means that he (and those unnamed males) make up 4.0x10^-13 of the male population, and since he included himself that means that there must be at least 2.5 trillion other males for him to despise.

Not only is this number 24x the total number of humans to have ever lived, but it isn't even the entire human population according to Chris! Going by the CIA World Factbook, the Male/Female ratio is currently about 1.01. Therefore there are at least 4.975 trillion people on earth.

[http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=+reciprocal4.0x10^-13]
[https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/geos/xx.html]

-He has claimed that he has an IQ over 300; using the standard deviations of the Stanford-Binet tests (15 from a mean of 100), that would put him in at over 12.5 standard deviations; less than one in 2 Decillion people. That is not a typo. 2 Decillion is a real number, and it looks like this

2,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000

The Wechsler IQ test gives an even scarier result; 13.333 standard deviations, or one in one hundred undecillion. In longhand that looks like this

100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000

[http://www.iqcomparisonsite.com/IQBasics.aspx]
[http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=12.5+standard+deviations+from+the+mean]

Maybe I'm wrong, but in my humble opinion [[fail]] is rarely as pure and as concentrated as a self-declared genius who thinks that there are more people alive on earth then there are stars in our galaxy*.

*~300 Billion by WolframAlpha's count

--[[User:Concerned Citizen|Concerned Citizen]] 20:08, 13 October 2010 (PDT)
*One, we have a forum dedicated to wild speculation and stuff, it's linked to in the NOT A FORUM template. Two, Chris wasn't thinking mathematically when he wrote 99.99999999996%, he just added extra 9's onto it until he felt like he'd made his point. Three, he just picked a high number because he understood that high IQ=smart guy. Chris doesn't think about things beyond the surface.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 20:13, 13 October 2010 (PDT)

*Although I agree Chris is an idiot and that he sucks at math, and although I agree that if we saw into his mind there would be enough content for an article, he's only demonstrated his math skillz once or twice. As of the moment, it really isn't article-worthy. Trust me, if there were enough content for it, I would be the first to support it. Still, drafting a page for it [[User:Concerned Citizen/Math|somewhere]] might be useful should more evidence of his inability come up. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 14:38, 14 October 2010 (PDT)

== Animation/short template ==

Do you think we can use a template for all the Lego/pen/paper shorts that Chris has made? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 20:11, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

== Chris comparisons ==

Is there potential for comparisons of Chris and various famous/infamous retards? See [[User:Kwon/Chris and Martin Bryant: A Comparison|the comparison of Chris and Martin Bryant on my user page]] for an example of what I mean. The format doesn't have to be the same. --[[User:Kwon|Kwon]] 01:01, 27 October 2010 (PDT)

the cwcki isn't meant for that purpose. besides, chris is chris. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 01:09, 27 October 2010 (PDT)

k. Fair enough. --[[User:Kwon|Kwon]] 01:10, 27 October 2010 (PDT)

== for logs and shit. Should there be a section for: Highlights? ==
Some people just don't have the patience to read all the logs. (see bluespike despite me actually editing them)

Or e-mails. Granted, some exchanges are so golden that they don't need a highlights section because they are all highlights but there have been some pretty boring things. I dunno. Maybe just for Bluespike because they are so long and unwieldy. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 09:46, 29 October 2010 (PDT)

: Highlights section sounds like a good idea. I've sort of wished something like that existed for [[Mailbag]], at least to give some sort of summary of what kind of stuff we could learn from there. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 10:03, 29 October 2010 (PDT)

== The Chris and... articles need a complete overhaul (Next project to improve) ==
I'm sick of conjecture and theories and STUPID BULLSHIT. I would do this myself, but I'm just going to get angry and destroy CWCki (again). This should be the next project to improve. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 14:33, 29 October 2010 (PDT)
:Not to bring your wrath upon me but I would ask: What specifically do you wish to see changed? Perhaps with a format to go off of we can accomplish what you seek. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 14:46, 29 October 2010 (PDT)
: I'm sick of conjecture and theories and STUPID BULLSHIT. oh and stick to facts only. There's a limit to how much stuff you can extrapolate from the actions that chris blahs out of his blahhole. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 14:52, 29 October 2010 (PDT)
: For those looking for areas that need the most attention, start with older videos (Ivy Saga and earlier are good places to go). Remove bullshit like "This video shows how much Chris fails at life" or "this video is one of the creepiest/worst/laziest videos Chris has ever made", and especially fuckery like "Chris was probably forced to make this because his parents yelled at him and he was hearing voices." Keep it all to a brief overview and objective as possible, with supporting facts where applicable. --[[User:OhhhMyAxels|OhhhMyAxels]] 14:33, 4 November 2010 (PDT)
:Can unecessary bullshit digressions be removed as well? A lot of times people add explanations of what exactly Chris did wrong where it's either 1)obvious or 2) shit no one cares about. Here is an example of what I mean "
Chris tries to translate Clyde Cash's name into Spanish, failing miserably. As you don't translate names, but if one did, it would be Dinero, not "Cashez", and the last name would still go last. Also, "de(l) ___" suffixes tend to be titles and honorifics. Thus, if names were to be translated, Clyde may be Claudio Dinero del Oro, lit: "Clyde Cash of the Gold." --[[User:Svek|Švek]] 08:27, 5 November 2010 (PDT)

== Donation drive ==

We need money for hosting and whatnot ([[User:Clydec|Clyde]] can explain it in details for people who care about technical shit). Donating will get you a '''SPECIAL, LIMITED EDITION''' user box (design to be announced). Donating $20 or more gets you another special edition userbox AND your very own "si a very cool guy" quote by yours truly. Donate early, donate often. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 14:18, 4 November 2010 (PDT)

Don'tPintheOop

2010-10-30T16:56:36Z

Svek: /* Transcript */

'''Don'tPintheOop''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris gives a shout out to Gulliver, a relative of [[Jackie]]. He then discusses the matter of pooping himself and the resulting [[DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS|dirty underwear]]. Finally he announces the upcoming execution of [[Clyde Cash]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Don'tPintheOop
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6nMj9BbZtkM}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|text}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Tragedy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}, {{Clyde|text}}
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[FullHouse]]
| next = [[ShowerClean1]]
}}

===Transcript===

(Chris is wearing blue taped glasses and holding a red clipboard).

Hello this is a video dedicated to a (looks at clipboard) Gulliver. It's a shout-out to him, a relative of a girl uh of the woman I'm seeing.
You know it's okay to be different. Ya know, sometimes we have our accidents, we poop ourselves. Yeah, then we end up with dirty pants. Hey I know I've had my accidents! They're mostly stress-induced! (sighs)
And specifically of a recent event I had a near - I had a near inci- near accident. I just really felt it bad in my gut. And I'll tell you what caused it. It was the risk of losing my- losin' my girlfriend here because of uh, things, cause of minor indifferences, especially a bein' able - me being unable to get on the pc because it's been busted. Lookin' ta get a new one. And I am going to get a new one.
But anyway, almost did but fortun'ly I was able to make it home in time. But there was another time where I actually - where I actually did happen to be where I pooped my pants in public. It was just stressed sisduced an' it could be held, it just came out quick. I mean, it was a very uncomforable ride home that day. But I managed to hold my- ta keep my cool and cleaned myself out after I got back home. So not really a big deal. I mean the only way that people might notice is possibly is from a weird way you're walking or otherwise the stench. But yeah, don't think of us as different, 's just something we gotta take care of ourselves because we can't right now. But we will take care of it when we get home or when we get to the nearest restroom.
And you know if you're tall - if you're tall enough to get over just squat over a commode in the men's room then wipe yourself, maybe wipe your underpants too. I have done that before myself. I actually done that in a public restroom. I mean yeah, if you can't make it home in time and you can't make it into a restroom either, you can just squat and clean yourself. That's the best thing to go for there.
Hey, I mean at least our faces are not fuckin' orange (removes glasses) like a certain Cashey Clyde that I know (replaces glasses). Stay tuned for an execution of him in a future video!

Don'tPintheOop

2010-10-30T16:46:04Z

Svek: transcript

'''Don'tPintheOop''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris gives a shout out to Gulliver, a relative of [[Jackie]]. He then discusses the matter of pooping himself and the resulting [[DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS|dirty underwear]]. Finally he announces the upcoming execution of [[Clyde Cash]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Don'tPintheOop
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6nMj9BbZtkM}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|text}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Tragedy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}, {{Clyde|text}}
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[FullHouse]]
| next = [[ShowerClean1]]
}}

===Transcript===

(Chris is wearing blue taped glasses and holding a red clipboard).

Hello this is a video dedicated to a (looks at clipboard) Gulliver. It's a shout-out to him, a relative of a girl uh of the woman I'm seeing.
You know it's okay to be different. Ya know, sometimes we have our accidents, we poop ourselves. Yeah, then we end up with dirty pants. Hey I know I've had my accidents! They're mostly stress-induced! (sighs)
And specifically of a recent event I had a near - I had a near inci- near accident. I just really felt it bad in my gut. And I'll tell you what caused it. It was the risk of losing my- losin' my girlfriend here because of uh, things, cause of minor indifferences, especially a bein' able - me being unable to get on the pc because it's been busted. Lookin' ta get a new one. And I am going to get a new one.
But anyway, almost did but fortun'ly I was able to make it home in time. But there was another time where I actually - where I actually did happen to be where I pooped my pants in public. It was just stressed sisduced an' it could be held, it just came out quick. I mean, it was a very uncomforable ride home that day. But I managed to hold my- ta keep my cool and cleaned myself out after I got back home. So not really a big deal. I mean the only way that people might notice is possibly is from a weird way you're walking or otherwise the stench. But yeah, don't think of us as different, 's just something we gotta take care of ourselves because we can't right now. But we will take care of it when we get home or when we get to the nearest restroom.
And you know if you're tall - if you're tall enough to get over just squat over a commode in the men's room then wipe yourself, maybe wipe your underpants too. I have done that before myself. I actually done that in a public restroom. I mean yeah, if you can't make it home in time and you can't make it into a restroom either, you can just squat and clean yourself. That's the best thing to go for there.
Hey, I mean at least our faces are not fuckin' orange like a certain Cashey Clyde that I know. Stay tuned for an execution of him in a future video!

Don'tPintheOop

2010-10-30T16:28:25Z

Svek:

Talk:Don'tPintheOop

2010-10-30T16:17:50Z

Svek: Created page with "I'll transcribe this.--~~~~"

I'll transcribe this.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 09:17, 30 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:PlayingHouse

2010-10-27T00:17:50Z

Svek:

Transcribin'

[[User:Enibure|Enibure]] 14:40, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Holy shit that was a long video. I think my brain started melting towards the end, so apologies for any stupid mistakes. Also Chris is REALLY hard to understand when he's doing his high-pitched voice. [[User:Enibure|Enibure]] 15:46, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

:Don't blame you, it's been awhile since I needed alcohol to finish one of Chris's videos. I'm gonna edit some parts I could make out that I think you missed. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 15:58, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

:Thanks, mate. [[User:Enibure|Enibure]] 16:49, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Shit, ''I'' may take up drinking if I keep up with Chris's shit. Anywho; Crystal, police woman, Officer Nasty. Nuff said.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 17:18, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Is it worth noting that, whilst playing house with children's toys, he brings up the concept of a murder trial? All things considered, it isn't really appropriate in the environment, and that he brought it up ties in a lot with his other failures to understand age-appropriate material (Sonichu slaughters and Sex Ed for little kids being the most imminent examples). [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 17:47, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
:Follow the idea of Occam's Razor, which states that the simplest explanation is most likely the correct answer. In this case, he probably just assumes that that's what people report on as journalists. So probably not.--[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 20:03, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Ooh, he updated his looks with a fleshie minifig. Anyway, I'd love to make a more accurate CWC minifig, but how do I add extra fat? [http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?i=1572900 This] gives me an idea... --[[User:AlfredNTheFettuc|AlfredNTheFettuc]] 21:59, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Would you slow-in-the-minds stop forcing these half-baked insults into the articles please? Lots of people send their kids to pre-school. Lots of people would like their partner to be vocal during sex. I don't know if the people adding this stuff come from countries where these things are somehow unacceptable or what but you don't need to try so hard to make Chris look bad. He can do that himself. --[[User:Herpderpflerp|Herpderpflerp]] 08:58, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

Do my eyes decieve me or does the lego Chris have a sonichu medallion on his chest?--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 17:17, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:DayOut

2010-10-27T00:04:49Z

Svek: /* Skin */ new section

Not sure why there isn't a DayOut 4-7. Also the my face is not fucking orange or whatever is the last part to this series. weird title but whatever. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 15:11, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
* I think 4-7 may still be processing on Youtube. Either that or uploading so many videos at once has screwed up a few uploads. --[[User:Clydewarren|Clydewarren]] 15:18, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
** If someone who has the power to can merge all the other DayOut pages with this one, that'd be awesome. ~~This post brought to you by [[User:ShotgunJones|ShotgunJones]] 15:40, 25 October 2010 (PDT). Thanks for reading!
::*I'm more curious about what that horrible rattling in the last video is whenever he comes to a stop. Anyone here particularly knowledgeable about cars? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 16:29, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
** Didn't he say something to the effect of his muffler being fucked? The sound is that of a bum muffler. --[[User:Schuzrum-dias|Schuzrum Dias]] 16:39, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
::*If his car is standard it could be him not clutching correctly..gear grinder. It could be a number of things really though, loose muffler, bad transmission...it's very noticeable when he he speeds up from first gear or goes into it gearing down...so regardless of auto/stan transmission my bet is that his first gear sucks ass, it's not a bum muffler though, it would be a lot louder while he was driving if it was.
--[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 16:42, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
:::It's an automatic, like most Americunt cars. Chris can't drive a manual - DA STRESS will be too much for him. Also, Number 5 is up. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 21:14, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
Quick question, is anyone transcribing the last one? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 16:45, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
:::I found a frame of video that captured the sticker on his windshield that tells him when he is supposed to have his oil changed. It says "4-5-09". --[[User:Riley_Martin|'''Uhh… this is Riley Martin.''' O-Qua Tangin Wann]]
* I would, but got midterm tomorrow, so only taking a break from studying. Whoever does, do have some notes for you to make in the italics: chris impatience with the red lights, and his 'casting' to have it change at his whim, the hospital mention could note how Chris may be a terminal resident in the near future, try to see if you can decipher the number on the below-mentioned handicap sticker.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 18:37, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
::*I think it's 1545074. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 21:58, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Is there anywhere here that explains why they would have a handicap parking sign? --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 16:52, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
*Virgin-yahh's one of the few states where being "high-fucntionign autistic" counts the same as having a missing limb, or cancer, so Chris gets special parking.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 18:12, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Just put up a rough transcription to the remaining DayOut videos. It may not be 100% accurate though, I struggled to understand Chris on some occasions. --[[User:Clydewarren|Clydewarren]] 06:30, 26 October 2010 (PDT)
== "At least my face..." ==

Possible [[Clyde Cash]] reference? What could possibly cause that title to be given to the last video? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 21:30, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
:Pointless, ineffective insult or reference to his awful cosplay, perhaps? --[[User:Eniggy|The Big Lenigski]] 21:35, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

==Breaks==
His breaks make a concerning tapping noise when he makes a full stop, particularly in "At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange". Either the pads have a glaze from the cold and him making unusually soft stops, or it's something completely different because I don't know shit about cars... If the former, than it's not a big deal... --[[User:Robotnik|Robotnik]] 22:16, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

*That wasn't his "brakes" it was his muffler, along with not taking care of his car like I should do as well. He needs a tune-up because my car shakes & hesitates when I stop or idle. [[User:ShinGokuIAM|ShinGokuIAM]] 04:01, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

== Skin ==

It seems that Chris's skin is even more horrible when viewed in good sunlight. Does this warrant a mention?[[User:Svek|Švek]] 17:04, 26 October 2010 (PDT)

PlayingHouse

2010-10-25T22:02:10Z

Svek:

Chris plays with some [[LEGO]] people like a [[pedofork]]. Most notably, he points out the [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|''pees and poops'']] of his fictional children.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|7wHqScoso3s}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject =
| style =
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[A Workout]]
| next = [[DayOut1]]
}}

== Transcription ==

Òkay, here's another story - you know it's[?] love and glory. Alright, this is me. This is my sweetheart. These are our children, that's, uh, Reginald, this one's Crystal. Reginald's da baby. Younger brother. This'll-this'll double as, table, and uh, beds. At their respective times. So... on with the show.

AnIhome. Coming home from work. ''[High pitched voice]'' ''Hi honey halhome!'' [''Normally''] Oh hi sweetheart, how ya doin'. How was your day at work. ''Oh it's been good, I'm just happy to see you home safe.'' [''Kissing sound''] Kiiiiiss. Anyways, journalism is very hard. Yes it is, I hear. So, what happened today? ''Aw, we [unintelligable] my article got some huge responses'' [''Wiggles "Jackie", tips her over''] Really. ''Yeah! But unfortunately uhh dey laid off Wilkinson at work.'' Lllayday off Wilkinson! What they do that for? '''Pparently he wasn't keepin' up!'' Oh. That's a shame.

[''"Children" slide in front of the screen''] Wheeewheewheewheewhee! [''Lego figures appear unfazed'']

''So, how're the kids?'' D-dey're doin' okay. You know, there's a... pla... they're just playing. Uh. Actually, uh. Cry-actually Crystal is uh, doin' her preschool homework and uh, Reg-Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' baabychild! Made his lil' peeps n' poops! And he we-and he went... weewee all over the bathroom, it was terrible mess. Terrible mess. I cl-had to clean all that up and of course I changed all of his diapers too. When they needed changin'.

==See also==

[[A Sonichu Day|A Sonichu Day]]

Talk:A Public Announcement for Congress

2010-10-19T17:15:57Z

Svek:

I'll have a go at transcribing this nonsense... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 22:09, 18 October 2010 (PDT)

That "You take the Good, you take the bad" crap is from Family Guy. I'm linking it to the Family Guy page. --[[User:Colonelslime|Colonelslime]] 23:22, 18 October 2010 (PDT)

It's interesting how he switches scale through the talk. Not that anyone who pays attention to Chris would expect coherent thought. He starts off with "Presidential Candidate" and how he can improve the nation. He then scales down to a city level with the police departments before sharing his policies on interplanetary invasion before finally explaining how he'll police the internet, essentially the communication network of the world at large. In fine Chris fashion, he is candidate for Supreme Leader.[[User:Mupkids|Mupkids]] 06:06, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

The summary is way to long. We don't need all that, I think Chris's failure speaks for itself. It is not necessary to explain point by point why the video is stupid.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 10:15, 19 October 2010 (PDT)
==Notice==

2.5% is half of 5%. Taxes aren't being cut by "a small fraction", they're being slashed in twain. In economic terms, that's effectively halving the government's income (I know they get money from other sources, but 5% of GDP is their largest contributor), which would destroy, among other things, the military, education, and scientific research in the US. Not a small thing at all. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 03:52, 19 October 2010 (PDT)
*Fuck, another victim of bad vision. I reread it and thought I got it right. Still, I think the point can be driven home more. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 03:54, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

== There's only one reason why Chris made this video ==

Obama has frozen Social Security checks until 2012, and many politicians are campaigning to cut SSA funding instead of raising taxes. There are far too many news links to sift through, so you can [http://news.google.com/news/i?pz=1&cf=all&ned=us&hl=en&q=Social+Security sift through them yourself]. --[[User:Riley_Martin|'''Uhh… this is Riley Martin.''' O-Qua Tangin Wann]] 09:33, 19 October 2010 (PDT)
*lol no. Chris is about as aware of how SS works as a chimp knows why food keeps being left in his cage at the zoo in the morning. [[User:CrassCrab|CrassCrab]] 09:38, 19 October 2010 (PDT)
**He may not know how his [[tugboat]] is funded, but he knows that less money for SS = less money for vidya. --[[User:Riley_Martin|'''Uhh… this is Riley Martin.''' O-Qua Tangin Wann]] 10:02, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Gilligan Be or Not

2010-10-19T14:20:11Z

Svek:

Apparently this is from an episode of Gilligan's Island, and I think Chris is trying to dress up as Gilligan (with the red shirt and something attempting to be a bucket hat).--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:09, 18 October 2010 (PDT)

== Transcription ==

I made a transcription. There was one part I wasn't completely sure of and I'm sure that it could be improved upon, but it's there.
[[User:Knight of Astraea|Knight of Astraea]] 22:46, 18 October 2010 (PDT)

== Shakespeare ==

Does Chris actually know what Shakespeare is? Does he know where this is originally from, or is he just ripping it wholesale from Gilligan's Island?

Also, I love Jackie. --[[User:Black Pickle|Black Pickle]] 06:52, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

*The tune is "L'amour est un oiseau rebelle" from Bizet's Carmen.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 07:20, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

Vitameatavegamin

2010-10-19T14:17:01Z

Svek:

'''Vitameatavegamin''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]]. In it, Chris repeats, almost verbatim, a well-known bit from the ''[[I Love Lucy]]'' TV show, where Lucy hawked a patent medicine.

Chris does a reasonably good job of repeating the lines, but his rapid delivery mangles the sentence "Do you poop out at parties?"

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Vitameatavegamin
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gAqqSJssgBQ}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|text}}
| style = {{Comedy|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = Unknown White T
| previous = [[Gilligan Be or Not]]
| next = [[A Public Announcement for Congress]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Chris walks on camera and waves cheerfully.'']

Hello, friends! I'm your Vitameatavegamin man! Are you tired, run-down, listless? [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|D'yapoopaparties]]?!

[''He waves his head around in a circle.'']

Are you [[Chris|unpopular]]? Yes, all your problems... This, in a bottle!

[''He picks up a bottle of vitamin pills.'']

Vitameatavegamin! Vitameatavegamin contains vitamins, meat, vegetables and minerals! Yes, with Vitameatavegamin you can spoon your way to health. Just take one tablespoonful after every meal.

[''He mimes eating a spoonful of the bottle's contents.'']

It's so tasty, too! It tastes just like can-daay! So why don't you join the thousands of happy peppy people and get a great big bottle of Vitameatavegamin TA-MORROW! That's Vita-meata-vegamin!

[''He puts down the bottle and walks off camera.'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gilligan Be or Not]]|nextlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

A Public Announcement for Congress

2010-10-19T14:12:58Z

Svek:

'''A Public Announcement for Congress''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]]. The "for Congress" part apparently represents some confusion or misconception, because the video actually consists of a stump speech directed at the American people, outlining the policies Chris would advance if he were president.

Chris offers a number of initiatives that would give [[tugboat|free money]] to [[Bob|senior citizens]] and the homeless, while also proposing that taxes be slashed to a tiny fraction of their current rates. In addition, he suggests that all of the guns should go to the [[jerkops|police]], and that [[Homos|gay people]] would be accepted in his [[CWCVille|Utopian society]], so long as he didn't have to notice that they exist. Finally, he suggests a police state in which emails and other forms of online communication are constantly monitored in order to prevent trolling. Whether the trolls would be [[03212010_C-Ya_Later.MOV|tortured bad]] for their actions has yet to be announced.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Public Announcement for Congress
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ghfoOqS2mM8}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Politics}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = Unknown White T
| previous = [[Vitameatavegamin]]
| next = Current
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[Image:Dope1.jpg|thumb|CWC [[2008]]]]

Good evening, friends. As your presidential candidate, I will now state how I feel, what we can do to improve this, these nations, these states. For one thing, we got so many poor people out on the streets. I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have soup beds. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS! So that there would be a bed for every homeless person until they can get back up on their own feet. Also, lower taxes. I will propose lower taxes, and we shall not have to pay so much. Five percent is okay, but why not two point five percent? And we will not cut off any benefits for the old people. They are good. And we shall give them plenty of money so they can afford the medications and services to keep them alive, because we do not pay for when we are sick, we pay for our good health! And we only pay after we're healthy. We're in good health. We pay to stay alive, we do not pay to die.

And, speaking of which, too much [[Sonichu 10|violence]] goes on within these city streets. I will propose only gun distribution to the official authority, which shall be the post-, which shall be within the [[Jerkops|police departments]]. Nowhere else. And all guns owned by locals, community people, shall be taken away. At least the bullets. When the bullets are necessary, or when there is an outbreak of violence from another nation or planet, then we shall issue the bullets. At all-, at free stations, to be opened immediately. Otherwise we'll send in our special troops. Our [[Chaotic Combo|special force]].

And also, we will be okay to have the gays within our community. In all states! There will be gay marriage ability for every state within the United Nations. I mean, keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody, 'cause mup- the- mag- [[Family Guy|what may be right for you, may not be right for most. For some. You take the good from the bad and then you get an opening statement like mine.]]

People need to appreciate life, so we will not have to face death. I lost my train of thought there, but that's okay. I am only human! We are all human! I am a noble, honest person. No matter what e'erbody else may say, even on the Internet, and my opponent, [[Clyde Cash|Señor Cachez de Clyyyyde]]. He tells liiies about me! And so do the trolls that have be-trolled me over the Internet. Their jeers, and non-cheers, do not go appreciated. Because it is not everybody who can take a joke. Even when it's at their own expense.

And with that, I will propose Internet securities, reinforced by the FBI, and there will be patrol stations of the Trollbusters around these United States. Any repor-, any troll activity that you may be suspicious of an individual, you report to your local authority! And they will tell, and then they will inform the local FBI station within that state. And then they will investigate thoroughly! Over the wireless that is called the Internet! And they will trace the e-mails back to the origin home address or location. And they will be apprehended and fined or sentenced, depending on how CRUEL they are to the [[Chris|victim]].

I stand strong, I stand firm, I AM A NOBLE LEADER! And if I am elected, I will do my best to keep our America strong and sound, and not go down the drain. I'm sorry, [[Obama|Obama]], I did vote for you, but I gotta agree with my father, you are bringing us, somuss- some of the situations downhill. But I have nothing against you because I did vote for you. And I liked your documentary on A&E. I would shake your hand at the first opportunity I would to meet you, Mr. President.

And thou- er- fore, I shall conclude my opening statement. In the candisacy of the president, I say, I will do my best! And [[Lies|I am not lazy]]! Thank you.

This ad is not real. I'm not being, going to be elected president, but I tell the truth nonetheless of what I would do if I were to become president. Thank you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gilligan Be or Not]]|nextlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress|Current]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Talk:Breast Cancer Awareness

2010-10-19T14:00:39Z

Svek: /* Stolen? */

{{Not A Forum}}

If nobody else is on, I'll do a rough transcription [[User:Hazard|Hazard]] 21:39, 18 October 2010 (PDT)
Transcription done. I'm not entirely sure how to format it to have the video and all that cool stuff show up, so if anyone could do that, it'd be rad. [[User:Hazard|Hazard]] 21:57, 18 October 2010 (PDT)
* I got that formatting thing up, now to identify it.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 22:10, 18 October 2010 (PDT)
== What's in Chris's Kitchen Game ==
Identify the shit. We should start a list on the main article. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 21:54, 18 October 2010 (PDT)
== Stolen? ==
That last bit HAS to be stolen from somewhere. Chris isn't that funny. --[[User:Black Pickle|Black Pickle]] 06:47, 19 October 2010 (PDT)
*It's pobably been said to him at some point by a gal-pal. --[[User:Svek|Švek]] 07:00, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

Pregnant Act

2010-10-19T13:58:08Z

Svek:

[[File:128747284554.png|thumb|Artist's rendition]]

'''Pregnant Act''' is a creepy video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]].

In this video, we see more of Chris's [[Homos|trans-sexual]] urges (while being able to physically see very little), as the scene begins with what amounts to a [[Chris and reality|biologically impossible]] (on multiple levels) self-impregnation, Chris having received what is presumably [[Jackie]]'s egg cell, which he has fertilized with his own [[navy]]. The 'pregnancy' is given form by padding under Chris's shirt, probably including the [[Plush Breasts|plush breasts]], in a scene straight out of Ed Gein's Bedtime Stories.

Having effectively screwed himself, the next scene has Chris on his back like some freakish turtle, futily attempting to right himself (with notable actual effort, and not just acting). The nightmare continues with the birthing scene, Chris now pointing the camera at his own crotch, and completing the birth by tossing a [[Li'l Chris|teddy bear]] onto his... knees.

Finally, in a scene vaguely resembling [[Family Guy]], ManMom Chris has his stomache exposed, and the plush breasts stuffed down his [[sports bra]], while he forces the bear to suckle from the surely diseased, alkaline, bleach-smelling teat.
{{clear}}

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Pregnant Act
| video = {{#ev:youtube|l-59XV1Hy28}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Male pregnancy}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{VerticalRedYellowShirt|text}}, {{Cwcbra|text}}, {{K-SwissShirt|text}}
| previous = [[100 2281]]
| next = [[Breast Cancer Awareness]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

Oh my god... look at me! Huh! My girlfriend reverse-impregnated me! The egg came out of her, and got into me! When we were having sexxxsss... oh my gosh. Goodness... [''camera fumbling then jump cut'']

Hm. Ugh. Goodness its difficult to get up these days, with number one in the way. Oof! Little heavy made me fall down. Made me fall down! [''camera fumbling''] Maybe I try... and see if get up. Oop! I fell down again! [''mumbling''] Let me tell you... oof! Ahh! [''grunts, then jump cut'']

Oh my goodness, it's a big one! [''grunts, strains, and mumbles''] Must watch breath... one two three! [''gasps''] EEeeaaahhhhgh! Ah! [''throws a stuffed bear onto lap''] Well! Congratulate me! I gave birth to a little beautiful baby... bear. And she's [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|female]]! Goodness... wow. [''jump cut'']

[''Chris has his shirt pulled up, exposing his muscle bra and pale fish-belly, the bear is pressed up against the plush breats''] It's baby's open that's right little child. Eat all you want out of there. You eat all you want out of there. [''an electronic toy says "I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!"''] Ha! First w-her first words! [[30 August 2009|We]] love you too!

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2281]]|nextlink=[[Breast Cancer Awareness]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Talk:100 2281

2010-10-17T15:55:29Z

Svek: /* Aka-chaka coffee */ new section

{{Not A Forum}}

i don't want to live on the same planet as this manchild. 
--[[User:Ano de freshman|Ano de freshman]] 22:34, 14 October 2010 (PDT)

Is anyone transcribing this yet? Also I think this may be the first time he recorded a video (other than the tour) in his kitchen? I'm thinking this is the kitchen anyway.. --[[User:MissRadioactive|MissRadioactive]] 23:06, 14 October 2010 (PDT)
:Sure, I'll transcribe this one... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 23:23, 14 October 2010 (PDT)
:He has made other videos in his kitchen ([[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|this]] and [[100 2189|this]] come to mind, I'm sure there's others too.) Mostly you can tell because of the horde of crap in the bathroom --This post brought to you by [[User:ShotgunJones|ShotgunJones]] 05:57, 15 October 2010 (PDT). Thanks for reading!

Hypocracy in regards to niggos or am I wrong? --[[User:MEANWHILE|MEANWHILE]] 01:15, 15 October 2010 (PDT)
:This is one of several recent attempts to sound [[Niggos|urban]] that he has made. I think linking to something about Chris and stereotypes would be more appropriate.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 09:08, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

Is it worth mentioning that this video happens in the kitchen, and that that is clearly the Christmas Tree seen in the Tour of Chris's House?
--[[User:Colonelslime|Colonelslime]] 10:44, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

== "go put your boats over Jackie like dat" ==

I'm pretty sure the "I'd have to rate your attempts of seducing Jackie with boats two thumbs down." line from the translation paragraph is incorrect (Though it may just be a Rule of Funny thing), from the sounds of it, it sounds more like Chris is saying that Lars chose his boats over Jackie than anything. At least I'm pretty sure that's what he's saying. Might not hurt to edit it to reflect that. --[[User:Xaranthis|Xaranthis]] 17:20, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

== "Chris was about to cry when he tried to tell off Lars" ==

Was that a reference to him wiping his face, presumably to wipe down a tear at the 1:00 mark? I wondered the same thing. --[[User:Vofdoom38|VofDoom38]] 20:41, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

== Aka-chaka coffee ==

What in the hell is he talking about here? Is this an actual drink? He's drinking Kahlua. --[[User:Svek|Švek]] 08:55, 17 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:100 2281

2010-10-15T16:08:52Z

Svek:

Talk:I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat

2010-10-15T16:03:13Z

Svek:

{{Not A Forum}}

Been a while since I done one of these. I'll try to transcribe this shit. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 22:16, 14 October 2010 (PDT)
:Well, I can't understand this. I'm useless as usual! [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 22:22, 14 October 2010 (PDT)
::Actually, looking it over myself, that's pretty much it, Clyde! Seriously, he needs to stop with the horrible accents.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 22:37, 14 October 2010 (PDT)

Isn't that a torch/flashlight he's holding? I don't own a life upgrade, so I don't really know about the PS move thing, but it looks like a torch/flashlight.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 09:03, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

== Should there be a link to Chris and Hypocrisy when he starts talking about "the homos" ==

in the xbox is okay video he says that homos are alright

:Given that it's in the same saga and from a rather recent video, I'm of the opinion that it should at least be added to the article.--[[User:Spoonman|Spoonman]] 00:10, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

== Random-access reference? ==

Doesn't the title remind you of [http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/bloodninja anything else]? Do you think Chris knows of this little exchange? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 07:08, 15 October 2010 (PDT)
:Considering Chris references Star Trek without actually watching anything related to Star Trek, I'm betting he just heard it somewhere and thought it was funny. - [[User:CypherFDP|CypherFDP]] 08:14, 15 October 2010 (PDT)
::I think Chris probably learned about it the same way I did: browsing ED. He's shown that he knows about several of the things that ED articles were made about (though I don't really have any links) and I wouldn't be surprised if he saw it there. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 08:25, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:I put on my Wizard's cloak and magic hat

2010-10-15T16:02:55Z

Svek:

{{Not A Forum}}

Been a while since I done one of these. I'll try to transcribe this shit. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 22:16, 14 October 2010 (PDT)
:Well, I can't understand this. I'm useless as usual! [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 22:22, 14 October 2010 (PDT)
::Actually, looking it over myself, that's pretty much it, Clyde! Seriously, he needs to stop with the horrible accents.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 22:37, 14 October 2010 (PDT)

Isn't that a torch/flashlight he's holding? I don't own a life upgrade, so I don't really know about the PS move thing, but it looks like a torch/flashlight.

== Should there be a link to Chris and Hypocrisy when he starts talking about "the homos" ==

in the xbox is okay video he says that homos are alright

:Given that it's in the same saga and from a rather recent video, I'm of the opinion that it should at least be added to the article.--[[User:Spoonman|Spoonman]] 00:10, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

== Random-access reference? ==

Doesn't the title remind you of [http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/bloodninja anything else]? Do you think Chris knows of this little exchange? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 07:08, 15 October 2010 (PDT)
:Considering Chris references Star Trek without actually watching anything related to Star Trek, I'm betting he just heard it somewhere and thought it was funny. - [[User:CypherFDP|CypherFDP]] 08:14, 15 October 2010 (PDT)
::I think Chris probably learned about it the same way I did: browsing ED. He's shown that he knows about several of the things that ED articles were made about (though I don't really have any links) and I wouldn't be surprised if he saw it there. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 08:25, 15 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:100 2279

2010-10-13T14:28:59Z

Svek:

I'll take a shot at transcribing this if no one else already is. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 22:40, 12 October 2010 (PDT)-~
:Good luck. He sounds almost completely incoherent in this video. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 22:42, 12 October 2010 (PDT)
*Already done. Feel free to look for mistakes though. --[[User:MissRadioactive|MissRadioactive]] 22:43, 12 October 2010 (PDT)
** When Chris is singing, he's saying it's true love we share, but other than that it seems fine.--[[User:Melainia|Melainia]] 23:18, 12 October 2010 (PDT)
***Thanks, I honestly couldn't make that part out. I don't watch the show, so that may have helped. --[[User:MissRadioactive|MissRadioactive]] 23:25, 12 October 2010 (PDT)

Removed the line "It may be worth mentioning that during the video he mentions Circuit City, which is where he presumably purchased the box set in the first place." It's not worth mentioning, it is a line from the "Cleveland Live!" episode of The Cleveland Show, and nothing more.--[[User:ShadowMoses|ShadowMoses]] 01:53, 13 October 2010 (PDT)
*So I'm assuming that the line about eMachines and Dell computers and cart racing came from the show as well? I've never seen the show. Also should we link to this video? It seems oddly prescient http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDyg8bxeyTM [[User:Svek|Švek]] 07:28, 13 October 2010 (PDT)

I think the other subject matter on this one should be racism as well [[User:Sinisterminister|Sinisterminister]] 05:37, 13 October 2010 (PDT)
*Why? Because Cleveland Brown is black? That's a dumb reason. Chris isn't being a racist here, he's just being stupid and is parroting some skits he saw on TV. --[[User:Marty Chang|Marty Chang]] 06:03, 13 October 2010 (PDT)

Do we really need all these EPIC REACTION IMAGES on the CWCki? The past 5 or so video articles have this shit for absolutely no reason other than to have a picture in the article to make it seem beefier. Fanart is alright (along with pictures Chris took himself or screencaps of the video to help round out the idea of the article) but we don't need screencaps of the Cleveland Show or The Flintstones. Removed the image for this article, but I'm leaving similar images in other articles. --[[User:Marty Chang|Marty Chang]] 06:03, 13 October 2010 (PDT)

Giant Penis Comic

2010-10-12T02:00:17Z

Svek:

{{honest}}
The '''Giant Penis Comic''' (officially '''''Sonichu'' Comic Special 3''', also known colloquially as '''PENIS COMIC''' in the [[Audiobooks]] adaptation) is a short comic drawn by [[Chris]], depicting his [[sex|wedding night]] with [[Ivy]]. It was hacked and published by [[The Miscreants]] on [[2009#April|April 29, 2009]]. It is notable for having a possible outline of Chris's [[penis]].

==Story==
[[Image:SchuComicSP3P5.jpg|thumb|The Giant Penis in question.]]

Following the events of Chris and Ivy's [[Wedding Comic|wedding]], Chris meets with Ivy's father [[Officer Keino]] who, it is worth noting, looks eerily like [[Things_Chris_has_ripped_off#Home_movies|coach John McGuirk]] from [[Adult Swim]]'s [http://intensities.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/coach-mcguirk2.jpg Home Movies]. Chris immediately begins brown-nosing his new father-in-law, displaying the utmost respect to both the man and the uniform. (This is especially hilarious considering Chris's issues with [[Jerkops]] and [[Bagget]] in particular.) Keino launches into a speech about what a great man Chris is and how he admires the tribulations our hero has endured. He entrusts Ivy to Chris's "strong, capable hands," which makes no sense, as usually the father of the bride gives his blessing ''before'' the wedding; instead we have Keino granting Chris permission to fuck his daughter (because who wouldn't want to read a porn comic that had their father in it?)

We then see Chris and Ivy checking into the Double-CWC Hotel (confirming that we are indeed in [[CWCville]]), where Chris has reserved a luxurious penthouse suite (even though the exterior of the hotel does not show a penthouse, nor do we see that their "suite" contains any more than one room). Chris has of course thought of everything—the room is set up with no fewer than five [[dirty crapped briefs|Glade Plug-Ins brand air fresheners]], and they will be sharing a meal of grilled chicken, mashed potatoes, greens and chocolate pudding.

Chris carries [[Ivy]] over the threshold and they are almost immediately naked. Chris stands, displaying his almighty [[pickle]], which turns out to be ''gigantic'', as in a [[duck|HUGE]] third leg. This depiction of his penis looks to be life-size, as if Chris studied and traced it and was told to give special attention to its crookedness. Anime speed lines seem to whiz past both Chris and Ivy's naked forms, suggesting that they are about to lose their respective virginities in a high-speed collision. A disturbingly intense study will reveal that the speedlines are only there to cover up the fact that Chris began to draw a huge scrotum, still visible as a half-circle, complete with pubes to go with his amazing duck, using the speedlines to conceal the half-finished pubes (that go off at different angles). Also the head of the penis is the same size as his actual head.

The newlyweds copulate for all of one panel before they both transform — Chris into [[Chris-chan Sonichu]], and Ivy into some as-yet-unnamed fursona. The two wretched creatures assume the doggy-style position, and make love into the wee hours. As they achieve simultaneous orgasms, both Chris and Ivy have stars in their eyes as they share the solemn thought of thanking [[Christian Weston Chandler|God]] for allowing them to find true furfag happiness.

The comic ends with the two gorging themselves on their $10-chicken dinner, making a toast with wine glasses filled with [[CWC Orange Soda]], and [[Semen|God knows what else.]] Chris and Ivy share a feeble attempt at humor that was lifted from [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fpjHayAQHqc Home Movies].
{{clear}}

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:SchuComicSP3P1.jpg|HEY BRENDON, why am I in a shitty comic by an autistic kid?
Image:SchuComicSP3P2.jpg|Ivy used too much botox. Also, note the fantastic dinner and dessert planned
Image:SchuComicSP3P3.jpg|Air fresheners are a big turn on: use eight of them!
Image:SchuComicSP3P4.jpg|Chris's extraordinary sense of dimension has finally got him laid. His magically changing shirt was probably a big help too.
Image:SchuComicSP3P5.jpg|Chris can't escape his bent [[dick]] even in his comics.
Image:SchuComicSP3P6.jpg|Then the yiffing commences. Notice Chris draws himself and Ivy better as furfags than as real people.
Image:SchuComicSP3P7.jpg|THANK YOU GOD! It's over!
Image:SchuComicSP3P8.jpg|Jaunty banter, after-sex banter.
</gallery></center>

==See also==
*[[Merried Seinor Comic]]

==External links==
*[http://www.megaupload.com/?d=UBO4NR0H Download the Giant Penis Comic]

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Sonichu]]
[[Category:Comic]]

100 2270

2010-10-11T01:52:57Z

Svek: It's supposed to be Liquid's shirt.

'''100 2270''' is the third of three videos [[Chris]] uploaded on 7 [[October 2010]]. In it, he does a painful impression of [[Alec Benson Leary]] in a strange, nasal voice in an attempt to mock him. Half the time his insults are [[Chris and English|unintelligible]] and his assumed, [[South Park|Eric Cartman]]-like accent makes the problem even worse.

Chris appears to randomly switch impersonations to one of [[Liquid Chris]] about midway through the video without changing his voice at all. He also proceeds to beat the dead horse about not only how Alec put [[Homos|homosexual imagery in Asperchu]], but about how violent Asperchu can be. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|Because we all know that Sonichu doesn't have]] [[Sonichu 10|gore, violence and needless killing of characters]], right?

Chris also claims Alec Benson Liquid is from [[Wikipedia:Philadelphia, PA|Philadelphia, PA]], and seems to base this on a phone call he received from a Blockbuster video location. However, neither Alec nor Liquid live in the vicinity.

Chris continues the trend of using construction paper props, making a facsimile of Liquid Chris's brown-striped shirt. The [[Asperchu Medallion]] makes a reappearance in this video.

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2270
| video = {{#ev:youtube|l8ir2SbF5T4}}
| stardate = 7 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Rage|text}}
| shirt = {{PityShirt|text}}
| previous = [[100 2269]]
| next = [[ECV 00001]]
}}

=== Transcription ===

''[Chris's face is partially obscured by darkness due to the lighting in his room. A large piece of cardboard with horizontal orange and grey stripes covers most of his chest. The Asperchu medallion is visible around his neck.]''

''[Odd voice]'' Ello, web! Dis is Christian Weston Chandler 'ere! But I'm no-I'm not really Christian Weston Chandler, and I'm not the creator of Sonichu because I live in Philadelphia! I was born in Philadelphia! At least as far as I know. [[Things Chris has ripped off|I don't have any originality]], or idea points because I never put up a page of myself! In real life, and still I only mock the real Christian Weston Chandler in Virginia-and now I am mocking Alec Benson Leary, ''[grabs Asperchu medallion]'' I am pretending to be Alec Benson Leary, oh look at me I'm Alec, [[Chris and Art|I draw teeeerrribly]], ''[mimes drawing]'' I draw everything in squares, I put [[homos]]exual images in the background, [[Death threats|I kill everybody!]] I put [[Sonichu_10#Forgiveness....3F|gore all over the floor]]- gore and blood all over the place, ''[flails arms and shifts from foot to foot]'' I killed the real Christian Weston Chandler, I even killed the origina-I even killed the second dude, who pretended to be the original!

''[pauses for breath]''

Anyway, I'm Christian Chandler, I live in Philadelphia, I also have girlfriend, her name is [[Kacey]], ''[more arm-flailing]'' except we're married now! And [[Chris and his ego|she coulda had the real Christian Weston Chandler]], who lives in Virginia, except I'm just a Christian Chandler who lives in Philadelphia! Now I'm sorry, [[Honor roll|I didn't mean Philadelphia, I meant to say Pennsylvania!]] Pennsylvania! But I pretended to be the original Christian Weston Chandler and rent movies from Blockbuster in Peennsylvaniaa! And the phone call was sent to the real deal, the real man in Virginia.

Yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda yaddblahblahblahyahbahblahyablahlalalalalah!

''[Pause]''

[[Britney Spears|Hey baby hit me one more time!]] I done it from my head! Bye now!

==See also==
*[[100 2267]]
*[[100 2269]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2269]]|nextlink=[[ECV_00001]]}}
{{Troll Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

User:Svek

2010-10-10T22:49:22Z

Svek: Blanked the page

Talk:A Hike

2010-10-10T19:06:02Z

Svek:

{{Not A Forum}}

Transcribed. Missed a few words, such as what he has in addition to his phone and camera and the word he used to describe the woodland theater. [[User:Mupkids|Mupkids]] 19:49, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

*Pretty sure he's saying "OFF!," as in the brand of insect repellant. The second unintelligible might be Palmer, since I think he's talking about the [http://www.monticello.org/parkway/woodlandtheater.html Palmer Woodland Theater]. --[[User:GrannyT|GrannyT]] 21:35, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

In the first few seconds of the video it sounds like he's saying "waking" insead of "making" [[User:MoarDesu|MoarDesu]] 20:50, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

What "Carter family" is he talking about?--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 21:04, 9 October 2010 (PDT)
*Considering he mentions the Carter name after reaching the overlook, he's probably referring to [http://www.monticello.org/parkway/carter.html this]. [[User:Tadahima|Tadahima]] 23:47, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

To whomever wrote it, 59 miles is NOT less than one kilometre. Hell, one mile is more than one kilometre. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 02:09, 10 October 2010 (PDT)
*Oh wait, my glasses weren't on. Derp. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 02:12, 10 October 2010 (PDT)
*I wrote it. 0.59 miles is about 950 meters, or a little over ten football field lengths. --[[User:Riley_Martin|'''Uhh… this is Riley Martin.''' O-Qua Tangin Wann]] 10:58, 10 October 2010 (PDT)

[[Wes Iseli|Wes]] commented on the video [http://www.youtube.com/comment_servlet?all_comments=1&v=37pXWB9rjBU (Search "WesIseli")] . Any thoughts? Should we be adding that bit of info here and/or on the main article of him? I'd do it but I'm too damn tired to think up a concise description --[[User:Nechita|Nechita]] 11:53, 10 October 2010 (PDT)
*You could say "Wes commented on the video and told Chris to get a job, proving he doesn't know our man-child very well". By the way, is it really the Wes Iseli or is it just someone using the name?[[User:Svek|Švek]] 12:06, 10 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Cherokian Clan

2010-10-10T18:52:21Z

Svek: Created page with "Chris's drawings of American Indians are oddly similar to the way they are portrayed by Mormons. --~~~~"

Chris's drawings of American Indians are oddly similar to the way they are portrayed by Mormons. --[[User:Svek|Švek]] 11:52, 10 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:A Hike

2010-10-10T04:04:35Z

Svek:

{{Not A Forum}}

Transcribed. Missed a few words, such as what he has in addition to his phone and camera and the word he used to describe the woodland theater. [[User:Mupkids|Mupkids]] 19:49, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

In the first few seconds of the video it sounds like he's saying "waking" insead of "making" [[User:MoarDesu|MoarDesu]] 20:50, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

What "Carter family" is he talking about?--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 21:04, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

A Hike

2010-10-10T04:02:04Z

Svek:

[[File:monticello.jpeg|thumb|The "village" of Monticello.]]
'''A Hike''' is a rare video that takes place both during the day and outdoors. The video is broken up into small chunks with [[Chris]] alternating between hiking and filming, [[Chris and health|presumably the exertion from walking up a slight grade requires all the energy he can muster]]. In what can be considered the spiritual sucessor to the [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkay]], he is immediately out of breath after the first cut and continues to deteriorate from that point.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Hike
| video = {{#ev:youtube|37pXWB9rjBU}}
| stardate = 9 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| saga =
| shirt = {{VertBlueGrayShirt|text}}
| previous = [[ECV 00001]]
| next = Current
}}

==Transcription==

''[Chris is filming himself with his handheld camera. He is sitting in his car in broad daylight. Children scream in the background]''

Quarter after three now. I'm gonna be making my way up a mountain trail nearby [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monticello The Monticello]. I'll check back in about a quarter of an hour. I've got my [unintelligible], my camera here and my phone. Be okay.

''[Jump Cut, Chris has begun to labor in his breathing]''

Ah, just a few minutes into my little hiking trail. So I walk off course to visit the little woodland theater or [unintelligible] that my congregation and I visited one past Sunday and now I'm gonna walk up further up the trail and I'll be back in a-

''[Jump Cut, Chris is standing still.]''

Another trail as got explored by me, so I'm gonna take a little look up the trail and see what's up this way. Check it a bit, it is quite a mysterious forest. Along the mountain beside The Monticello.

''[Cut to dead tree]''

Hm. A tree that has been uprooted by a past weather event, along the side of this path. Deep in the chasm, that forms a river. Which could be a river, if there was more water in it.

''[Jump Cut, Chris's heavy breathing is slowly replacing the narration as the dominant soundtrack]''

Deeper and deeper into the forest the trail goes, where it leads? I don't know yet. There's a rock with moss. Moss grows on the north side. On tree bark or rock formations. I just walked across a wooden plank. ''[Prolonged gasping for air]'' If you think it's spooky. Well, you're wrong. Because it's only a stick I've stepped on. A really big stick. North is that way! As I have seen, on this rock and it's mold.

''[Narration becomes slower and slower with more breaks]'' Huh, look at that. A tree bit formation with moss on the wrong side. Bet it got twisted and turned. That's why it's on the wrong side. Isn't it?

It is a sunny day in the village of Monticello. It's even a sunny day in the forest. Things may or may not be well, we'll see what what happens as we walk long this trail ''[Breathing continues horribly]''

Huh, another tree fallen. ''[Chris sings]'' Free fallin'. Cut up 'chucks. Ah, look at this, a bit of an open field. A field that is open. Preferred by one animal or two, or so. Quite possibly, they know that people go this way in the fork of the road. On their way back to civilization and I'm not ready to head back just yet. Look at that ''[[Chris points the camera at a tree]'' a shade of red on this tree. One would suppose, rotted? Or dead wood? Or perhaps it is just dirty from dirt and grime thrown upon by it's wondrous past.
[[File:Blairchris.png|thumb|The paralells are eerie.]]

Over here, there's another big tree. OVER THERE! Fallen and uprooted.

''[Heavy breathing, slow walking, shaky camera]''

Quite a chasm down there. If that were water, it probably would be a river. A big one.

''[Heavy breathing followed by a burp]''

Goin up a trail, not down the trail. Goin up a trail not down the trail.

I'd care to comment, but you know what? I'd just prefer to marvel on nature and it's revels. A bug buzzing about me. Not busy as a bumble bee.

''[Camera spends prolonged periods of time pointed at the ground, Chris is now gulping air.]''

''[Two pained grunts]''

Whew, a long way up we have gotten.

''[Chris is stumbling with exhaustion and stops midway on the trail]''

Well I think we've reached the end of our trail, not too many ways to go, yeah? We have reached a dead end.
''[Camera clearly shows the trail continuing off to the right, despite Chris's claims to the contrary]''

In just a moment, I'm going to head by to my car. Take a hiking trail of your own, if you will, in your own forrest where there in dwell.

''[Jump Cut]''

Another commentary note, if you will, for down that big trail at that major fork with the clearing, we find an overlook. Let's take a look over.

Hm. Vast glorious view from here. As was portrayed and enjoyed by a Carter family.

''[Chris points the camera at himself. He is simultaneously flushed, pale and drenched with sweat]''

Signing off now, y'all take care and be s-

File:Monticello.jpeg

2010-10-10T03:56:46Z

Svek: Thomas Jefferson's Monticello.

Thomas Jefferson's Monticello.

A Hike

2010-10-10T03:47:49Z

Svek:

'''A Hike''' is a rare video that takes place both during the day and outdoors. The video is broken up into small chunks with [[Chris]] alternating between hiking and filming, [[Chris and health|presumably the exertion from walking up a slight grade requires all the energy he can muster]]. In what can be considered the spiritual sucessor to the [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkay]], he is immediately out of breath after the first cut and continues to deteriorate from that point.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Hike
| video = {{#ev:youtube|37pXWB9rjBU}}
| stardate = 9 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| saga =
| shirt = {{VertBlueGrayShirt|text}}
| previous = [[ECV 00001]]
| next = Current
}}

==Transcription==

''[Chris is filming himself with his handheld camera. He is sitting in his car in broad daylight. Children scream in the background]''

Quarter after three now. I'm gonna be making my way up a mountain trail nearby [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monticello The Monticello]. I'll check back in about a quarter of an hour. I've got my [unintelligible], my camera here and my phone. Be okay.

''[Jump Cut, Chris has begun to labor in his breathing]''

Ah, just a few minutes into my little hiking trail. So I walk off course to visit the little woodland theater or [unintelligible] that my congregation and I visited one past Sunday and now I'm gonna walk up further up the trail and I'll be back in a-

''[Jump Cut, Chris is standing still.]''

Another trail as got explored by me, so I'm gonna take a little look up the trail and see what's up this way. Check it a bit, it is quite a mysterious forest. Along the mountain beside The Monticello.

''[Cut to dead tree]''

Hm. A tree that has been uprooted by a past weather event, along the side of this path. Deep in the chasm, that forms a river. Which could be a river, if there was more water in it.

''[Jump Cut, Chris's heavy breathing is slowly replacing the narration as the dominant soundtrack]''

Deeper and deeper into the forest the trail goes, where it leads? I don't know yet. There's a rock with moss. Moss grows on the north side. On tree bark or rock formations. I just walked across a wooden plank. ''[Prolonged gasping for air]'' If you think it's spooky. Well, you're wrong. Because it's only a stick I've stepped on. A really big stick. North is that way! As I have seen, on this rock and it's mold.

''[Narration becomes slower and slower with more breaks]'' Huh, look at that. A tree bit formation with moss on the wrong side. Bet it got twisted and turned. That's why it's on the wrong side. Isn't it?

It is a sunny day in the village of Monticello. It's even a sunny day in the forest. Things may or may not be well, we'll see what what happens as we walk long this trail ''[Breathing continues horribly]''

Huh, another tree fallen. ''[Chris sings]'' Free fallin'. God damn 'chucks. Ah, look at this, a bit of an open field. A field that is open. Preferred by one animal or two, or so. Quite possibly, they know that people go this way in the fork of the road. On their way back to civilization and I'm not ready to head back just yet. Look at that ''[[Chris points the camera at a tree]'' a shade of red on this tree. One would suppose, rotted? Or dead wood? Or perhaps it is just dirty from dirt and grime thrown upon by it's wondrous past.
[[File:Blairchris.png|thumb|The paralells are eerie.]]

Over here, there's another big tree. OVER THERE! Fallen and uprooted.

''[Heavy breathing, slow walking, shaky camera]''

Quite a chasm down there. If that were water, it probably would be a river. A big one.

''[Heavy breathing followed by a burp]''

Goin up a trail, not down the trail. Goin up a trail not down the trail.

I'd care to comment, but you know what? I'd just prefer to marvel on nature and it's revels. A bug buzzing about me. Not busy as a bumble bee.

''[Camera spends prolonged periods of time pointed at the ground, Chris is now gulping air.]''

''[Two pained grunts]''

Whew, a long way up we have gotten.

''[Chris is stumbling with exhaustion and stops midway on the trail]''

Well I think we've reached the end of our trail, not too many ways to go, yeah? We have reached a dead end.
''[Camera clearly shows the trail continuing off to the right, despite Chris's claims to the contrary]''

In just a moment, I'm going to head by to my car. Take a hiking trail of your own, if you will, in your own forrest where there in dwell.

''[Jump Cut]''

Another commentary note, if you will, for down that big trail at that major fork with the clearing, we find an overlook. Let's take a look over.

Hm. Vast glorious view from here. As was portrayed and enjoyed by a Carter family.

''[Chris points the camera at himself. He is simultaneously flushed, pale and drenched with sweat]''

Signing off now, y'all take care and be s-

ECV 00001

2010-10-10T03:34:24Z

Svek:

[[File:Iron_eyes_cody.jpg|thumb|Iron Eyes Cody weeps from all that has been lost.]]
[[File:johnredcorn.jpg|thumb|John Redcorn does not approve.]]

'''ECV 00001''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 9 [[October 2010]], in which he paraphrases [[Wikipedia:Cherokee|the Wikipedia article]] about the [[Cherokee]] while dressed as what he thinks they looked like. Throughout the video, he holds a [[PlayStation]] Move controller and a matching "Navigation Controller", probably to show off his purchase in the delusion that anyone gives a shit. Chris also returned to using his old [[PSEye]] to record this video, this causes a number of skips to occur throughout the video. Of note is how Chris is careful to elaborate how peaceful the Cherokee clan was, specifically how [[Prickly-Wicklies|war is bad]], yet he pulls a 180 near the end by stating how fierce they were and that the [[Death threats|trolls should beware.]] Chris, always sensitive to the plight of minorities, speaks in a stereotypical "kemosabe" style Indian voice until he starts talking about black people at which point he starts speaking in a hip, urban manner in order to show that he is [[Retarded|"down"]].

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00001
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mum48216-C0}}
| stardate = 9 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}
| style =
| saga =
| shirt = {{Cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[100 2270]]
| next = [[A Hike]]
}}

=== Transcription ===
''[Chris is wearing his muscle bra with construction paper accents to give his impression of a very very [[homos|fierce]] Cherokee warrior], he has his arms crossed over his chest with an Playstation controller in each hand''

Me noble Cherokee Man. I come to you with a brief bit of introduction to our Cherokee clan. We were a peaceful lace... peaceful race, most of our history is encrypted within Spanish history. Some of it was previously uh translated, was translated, as found on The Wikipedia under the term "Cherokee" C-H-E-R-O-K-E-E.

We were very peaceful, [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_of_the_hill I tell ya what.] We were so peaceful, that we found war activities to be a polluting activity. And we had and a whole and before it was revoked we had purity sessions of which our priests of our clans purified the warriors that went out into battle before they come into to the village and resume life there. And we were even bartered as sluts bartered off as slaves to the Virginia and north and northward.

And we had a whole bunch of medishin [[Tobacky|medicianal supstances]] that were created within our times by our witch doctors, which I happen to have a witch doctor. His name is on my thing there, but [[Honor_roll|I forgot memorize it.]] Which he comes from the Chandler Clan on my father's side. It was a good union, though, between my father meeting my mother for she comes from the English clan, but we were here in America first and we had our own tortures. And through a whole bunch of trials and tribulations, we ended up walking the Trail Of Tears.

Of which, as we walked the trail, some of us wandered off the trail to be hidden from those that have considered us slaves. Unfortunately, thanks to our right... thanks to our guys, slavery has been abolished altogether, including the black slaves. Though I not say that, it was of an consasensus...

''[Chris suddenly changes from offensive Indian imitation to offensive urban patois]''
Hey, we're with you on this one dude we're with you on this one dudes. I mean, we were slaves as well back in the day. But we've managed to collect ourselves, and there only a few of us left within this America and mostly there are only partial regions with us, but there are orginisations of us Cherokees within states like Oklahoma and Tennesee. More information on this as well as our history on The Wikipedia. Also, we did go off out in battle after that practice was abolished. Of which we have purified our warriors before they could return to our village. We were fierce though. We were very very fierce. But anyway, with that, don't mess with us. For we will [[CWC is Angry|shoot you]] [[Gun Comic|down]]. Pew! ''[Pantomimes shooting a bow and arrow]''

==See also==
*[[War Paint Video]]
*[[Cherokian Clan]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2270]]|nextlink=[[A Hike]]}}

100 2265

2010-10-10T00:51:07Z

Svek: It's paper.

[[File:Robble.jpg|thumb|left|Graphic re-enactment of the video]]
[[File:Hamburglar.jpg|thumb|The Hamburglar laughs at an [[Ian Brandon Anderson|impostor]]]]

'''100 2265''' is a [[Random access humor|bizarre, nonsensical]] video [[Chris]] uploaded on 3 [[October 2010]]. In it, we see Chris, clad in his female support garment and what appears to be some sort of black wrapping, babbling about hamburgers in an incoherent manner. He tries to imitate the fast-food icon [[wikipedia:Hamburglar|the Hamburglar]] by prancing around [[Chris's room|his room]] shouting "robble robble" in a nasally, high-pitched voice. Even when acting crazy, Chris somehow manages to screw things up as his costume lacks several key elements.
{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2265
| video = {{#ev:youtube|W3gD0VWFA3U}}
| stardate = 3 [[October 2010]]
| subject = Robble (?)
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[Lars_Is_Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]]
| next = [[100 2266]]
}}

=== Transcription ===

[[File:RonaldWTF.png|thumb|Ronald would like to congratulate the CWCki's experts of video transcription... not that the transcription helped him much in this case.]]

''[Chris appears in his [[muscle bra]] with strips of black paper taped over his rotund figure. He has likewise taped over his eyes, to imitate the Hamburglar's mask]''

'eeyyyyyy folks! Robble, robble, robble!

''[Some of the tape has fallen off, Chris adjusts it.]''

I'm Hamburglar here! Deep fat-frying fat-ridin'(?) robber here! Robble, robble!

''[Chris points to a blurry, out-of-focus image of a Big Mac on his television]''

I'm gonna steal me that Big Mac there! Robble, robble, robble! It's so delicious! Robble, robble, robble!

''[Chris moves closer to the screen and begins gesturing at the image.]''

Oh, robble, robble, robble, robble, robble! Two whole/all beef patties! Robble, robble, robble, robble! [[Navy|Special Sauce]]! Robble, robble, robble, robble, robble! Onions, [[Pickle|pickles]], cheese! Robble, robble, robble, robble! All on a sesame seed bun! ''[Chris pronounces "bun" like "biyun" here.]'' Robble, robble, robble!

''[The image of the Big Mac briefly comes into focus.]''

MCDONAAAALD'S! Robble, robble, robble, robble, robble! Robble, robble, robble!

==See also==
*[[McDonald's]]
*[[Obesity]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]]|nextlink=[[100 2266]]}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Mailbag 45

2010-10-10T00:48:44Z

Svek:

__NOTOC__'''Mailbag 45''' was uploaded to the [[CWCipedia]] on 22 [[January 2010]]. [[Chris]] had been relatively diligent about updating his incredibly ugly website, and it was expected that he would get to it that evening. Instead he took an as-of-yet unexplained 3 day hiatus.

He finally began answering it on 25 January 2010, only to answer less than half of the letters before leaving to do something with his family. Highlights so far include Chris comparing himself to legendary cartoonists, another saga in the increasingly bizarre "whores for my son" series of letters, and telling us to get over ourselves in relation to him constantly showing us [[Rosechu|Rosechu's]] ass. He finished answering it the next evening despite his promise to finish a day before.

==Answered==
===Charlie Brown===
{{Email|From: [[Vivian Gee|Hamsty the Hamster]] <hamstythehamster@gmail.com>

Seriously. Fans from 10 years ago have grown up. Maybe you should too.}}
{{EmailReply|"Peanuts" fans still enjoy Charles Schultz's work and praise him although he has been dead for almost ten years now.}}

===Not that that means anything===
{{Email|From: [[Duck|Mike Hawke]] <fail2comply@live.co.uk>

Hey Chris,

Would you sell all of your games and toys, if it will guarantee you'll get a girlfriend?}}
{{EmailReply|It is being considered.}}

===Adventures with whores===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Michael Jackson|Mike Jackson]] <mikejackson113@hotmail.com>

Chris,

I need you now more than ever. I need you to do a shoutout in your video for my son Mike Junior. He has run away with the prostitute that I hired for him a week ago. He'd told my wife and I that it was a love match, but we didn't believe him. Now they are on the run to Vegas where they are going to get married- my son has a fake ID and is going to use that to pretend that he's 18. Can you ask him to come home? We promise that we won't run his girlfriend away as long as he comes back.

Also, my wife is concerned about the language you are using to the writers of [[Asperchu]]. She says that it is way too harsh for our children and because the kids are already so upset, she has made me stop reading your comics to our children.

Sincerely,

Mike

P.S.- MIKE JUNIOR COME HOME! ALL IS FORGIVEN!}}
{{EmailReply|I will make a video later today. --ChrisChanSonichu 21:22, 25 January 2010 (CET)}}
''Chris never made the promised video. Mike called him out on it [[Mailbag 48#This guy's life is in shambles, but Chris was STRESSED!|three mailbags later]].''

===Robble robble===
{{Email|From: [http://www.youtube.com/user/billymc Billy MC] <billymcbigmac@gmail.com>

Hello Chris,

I am a big fan of you and [[Sonichu]]. I am writing to ask you if you ever worry about the [[100 2265|Hamburglar]] stealing your [[McDonald's]] food. My mother takes me to McDonald's quite a lot and whenever I am there I am always sure to look around for the Hamburglar because you never know where he might be lurking, waiting to snatch away your Big Mac and fries! Speaking of McDonald's, you and the [[100 2266|Grimace]] share many similarities. I believe he might be High-Functioning [[Autistic]] too!

Love,

Billy MC}}
{{EmailReply|How old do you think I am? [[Chris and anger|I am not an immature child]]; I am 27 years old. --ChrisChanSonichu 21:22, 25 January 2010 (CET)}}

===Chris' hormones + Rosechu's ass = Fan service===
{{Email|From: Faye Dexter <ecksdeexter@gmail.com>

Dear Chris, most of your fans that are still reading are ADULTS and we demand to be treated as such! You lost most of your underage fans with the sex storylines(even censored, most parents don't let that kind of thing fly) so I suggest that there be more MATURE storylines with gore and violence. Games rated M usually have gore in them and those are rated M for MATURE. TV-MA is for MATURE AUDIENCES and usually has gore and violence. So could you include those in the comic so your adult audience doesn't feel like they're reading a baby comic for babies?}}
{{EmailReply|I am not a gorey artist; just accept the Fan Service of panty-shots and get over yourselves. --ChrisChanSonichu 21:22, 25 January 2010 (CET)}}

===Later bitches===
{{EmailReply|**I will resume later; I have to go out with my family for a short while. --ChrisChanSonichu 21:22, 25 January 2010 (CET)}}
''This was later removed before answering the rest of the mailbag on 26 January.''

===Enough evidence===
{{Email|From: Andrew Rinker <ffa_chewster@yahoo.com>

I'm just wondering why you were so rude in your response to the [[Mailbag 43#Go Fuck Yourself, too!|final question in mailbag 43]] (from Keith Keithson). All he did was present an in depth, well thought out argument. Is that how you respond to any argument you do not agree with? Wouldn't it be better to actually attempt to refute his claims? All you are doing with your response is showing that you have no evidence to refute his claims, and are therefore conceding that they are, in fact, the truth. No disrespect intended, I'm just curious why you don't simply take the time to present your own counterpoints to his, rather than just telling him to "go fuck yourself". That's very rude, and only serves to portray you in a negative light.}}
{{EmailReply|I do not care much for those who question my claim on Sonichu, especially after I have acquired the Paper Copyright Registration on Sonichu for myself. As far as I am concerned, that C.R. is enough Evidence to support me and my Sonichu.}}

===No Artistic Taste===
{{Email|From: Bernardo Garcia <garciscinq@gmail.com>

So let me get this straight, you are saying people who don't like your comic series are mentally underdeveloped and have poor taste?}}
{{EmailReply|You misunderstand and misquote me. I was stating that those who think BLOCKY-STYLE, Low-Resolution drawings are even remotely better than my own hand-drawn style, which I HAVE A WHOLE LOCAL COMMUNITY OF CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA, and MY Church Congregation who all Agree that MY Art Style is Excellent; those who see the Blocky, which is crappy in my point of view AND in Art Experts' P.O.V., as even an inkling of good Have No Artistic Taste. --ChrisChanSonichu 02:31, 27 January 2010 (CET)}}

===The harshest of attitudes===
{{Email|From: Trap Master

Dear Chris

You've said you don't want to remove [[Simonla]] from the comics because it would be taking away [[Wild]]'s girlfriend. It's wrong to put Wild's, a FICTIONAL character, feelings ahead of a real person. Leaving Simonla in your comics is hurting [[Evan]], stop being a monster and do the right thing.}}
{{EmailReply|Evan is overreacting; I do not listen to those who overreact and condescend to me with LOUD Tones and Harshest Attitudes.}}

===Not likely===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Manfred Eicher|Manfred Eicher]] <m.eicher@gmail.com>

Hey Chris,

I am a volunteer with the German Red Cross and I am currently in Haiti helping to bring people's lives back to normal. It's grueling work. It's hot and some people still can't get clean water and food. Although your poster is nice, it won't get things done here. If you really want to help, it often makes a big difference when celebrities donate large sums of money which they encourage people to match. You may have already done this and if you have, you should announce it. Alternatively, if you were to volunteer to come to Haiti and put some elbow grease into the project, it might encourage others to do the same. It would go a lot further than a poster and we would really appreciate the help.

Best regards,
Manfred}}
{{EmailReply|I am considering that greatly, and I have already donated a healthy sum into the funds that have exceeded $57 million.}}

===Mistakes, errors, and ordeals===
{{Email|From: Brianna Ricaud <bricaud75@gmail.com>

Chris, in your reply to my mail you claimed that you always censor adult stuff from your comics and that images were "tricked from you".

Let me remind you that it was YOU that took those pictures. It was YOU that drew a [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|NASTY, PORNOGRAPHIC picture]] of you MOLESTING your best friend [[Megan]]. No one forced you.

You have proved that you're a liar and a hypocrite and you have lost another fan. Alec has never lied and he doesn't do cowardly things and then deny them.

Good riddance,

Brianna}}
{{EmailReply|HE does not have a page on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] that has taunted him for over two years; HE was not deceived by Internet [[Trolls]] who pretended to be a number of women who "wanted to be his girlfriend" who trick him into sending them HIS valuable, yet recreatable, possession, a copy of HIS Limited-Copied-and-Distributed-within-Friends-and-Family Life [[DVD]] that he completed on his 25th Birthday. HE never has had to deal with True Women who he thought fully in his heart to be The One Sweetheart, who each [[death|DIED]] Prematurely in [[PandaHalo|Brushfires]], [[Sarah Jackson|Automobile Accidents]], [[Ivy|Suicide]] and [[Julie|whatnot]]. HE has a mental ailment that LACKS in comparison to my own; HE has been MORE Social Outward his whole life, while I HAD TO deal with MORE Social Awkwardness than HE could ever Count and Imagine.

You think I DENY MY OWN MISTAKES, ERRORS and ORDEALS? YOU CAN GO COUNT YOUR OWN CURSES AND SEE HOW THEY OUTWEIGH YOUR OWN BLESSINGS. Or, here's a quote from John Kramer (fictional character with DEPTH), "Live or Die, Make Your Choice." My versions, "Peace or Worry; Fight or Flee; Strong Will or Mistaken Impulses; Draw your Fated-to-Die Sweetheart Alive or Dead; Fact or Fiction...etc., etc., etc.... Make YOUR OWN CHOICES."

Who has had to suffer more in Life: Christian with Autism or Alec with Naive Attitudes?
--ChrisChanSonichu 02:31, 27 January 2010 (CET)}}

===This is why you're losing your fans===
{{Email|From: Cpt. Wyvern <masterwyvern@googlemail.com>

Why do you always criticise the Asperchu comics for being poorly drawn? [[Chris and art|Your art style isn't too great too, y'know]], you don't have much room to criticise others.}}
{{EmailReply|Who are YOU to criticize me? G4 TV's '''X-Play?'''}}

===Chris NEVER deletes letters===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Gil Gerard|Gil Gerard]] <gilsemailaddy@yahoo.com>

As a fan of your comic, recently I've been feeling insulted by the things you've been saying to us. In your mailbags, you've been calling us hypocrites and mentally devolved, and you've been slashing and ignoring a lot of good questions from your mailbags for no reason. This is no way to be treating your fans. You seem to want us to worship you like you're God or something, and you seem to not be able to maturely handle criticism.

I noticed that other comic artists will actually answer the letters they get. I know you don't like that Leary guy, but at least he answers emails and treats his fans with respect. I hope you do the same before you lose all of your fans.

--Gil}}
{{EmailReply|Well, at least I do answer my Letters. And I am certain he deletes EVERY LAST LETTER he is the least offended by, or REWORDS ALL of such; AT least I put most of those letters in a seperate bag and give them notice and attention appropriately. I feel distraught when I have to put up with such, and I am certain all the other artists do the same, even worse by tossing them into the trashcan like an office person who makes it fun with balling up the paper and shooting the hoop. At Least I give every one of my letters full reading time and thought. --ChrisChanSonichu 02:31, 27 January 2010 (CET)}}

==Gone Forever==
===Baby Chrissie===
[[Image:FuckingHardcore.JPG|thumb|Fuck yea Asperchu.]]
{{Email|From: darkestfor@asia.com

I'm writing because, after seeing the [[Asperchu]] "hardcore" ad, I have decided to give up your baby comic for Alec's mature book. Have fun coloring within the lines, Baby Chrissie. Don't [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shit]] your [[Butt garments|diapers]] too much.}}

===At one point we all had this reaction===
{{Email|From: Harold Man

Dear Chris,

I used to be a big fan of Sonichu for a long time because it seemed to have very subversive themes. You drew in a manner that seemed intentionally bad. Like you were parodying Republican views. But you're serious? That's amazing. No one would like your comic if you were actually being serious. I just told my friends that you're serious and we're are laughing our asses off. You're so naive.

You're really serious. Like, the biggest Sonichu fan forum is full of threads about how hilarious your work is and how they'd write comic book companies to carry your work. Just wait 'til word gets out that you're serious. That you aren't kidding when you say Sonichu is straight. Everyone will leave.

[[Trolls|Your audience]] now is all college students who think you're being ironic and funny. Little kids aren't interested. Believe me, I tried to show my brother. He told me to get the crap out of his face because he was playing [[Hex Bawx|X-Box]]. Kids don't care about cartoons anymore. The only people who read it, read it because it has undertones of homosexuality.

Seriously, I think you misunderstand why Asperchu is popular. Now, its drawing is average, but what hooks readers is the underlying themes. Because of your autism, you don't get it. It's like a big secret joke that you don't see. Maybe you should ask a non-autistic friend to explain it to you. That is, if you care about your fans. They'll all leave and you won't know why.

You're saying Alec shot himself in the foot. Pfft, he made the smarter move by going more adult and serious. He knows his fanbase. Apparently you don't know yours.

I know you won't reply to this because you're a coward.

~ A former fan}}

===Caught in a lie? Just delete the evidence===
[[Image:Issue0Page3.jpg|thumb|Caught in a lie. Again.]]
{{Email|From: levelledcompany@bikerider.com

I saw your "TheTailofRosechu.jpg" image and thought, "Hey, that's not what I remember." Then I looked back at the comics, and sure enough, the Raichu's tail is pointed and sharp, like that of a male's. What gives? Why lie to your fans like this?

You can't just lie to your fans, and you can't just keep going back and changing stuff in your comics. I hated how you changed the "My love quest is finally over" page almost as much as I hate being lied to by a big fat liar like you. It's stuff like this, all the lies and retcons, that make me feel like I should stop reading the comic.

If you want to make things right, apologize, admit your mistake, promise to never make the same mistake again, and (this is the most important part) NEVER DO IT AGAIN. Stop lying, even "small" lies, and quit changing your old stuff.}}
''The writer of this letter is referring to the image found [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|here]].''

===Obviously not===
{{Email|From: [[Vivian Gee|Hamsty the Hamster]] <hamstythehamster@gmail.com>

Who gives a shit if you have [[Heather Iglesias|some lesbian named Heather]] if YOU ALREADY CURED ALL THE HOMOSEXUALS IN CWCVILLE?!?!?!?!?!? Do you even keep track of your plot anymore?}}

===Sweet Alec and Hella Evan===
[[Image:Sweet alec & hella evan.jpg|thumb|80px|I love you man, no homo.]]
{{Email|From: Evang7 <evang7@gmail.com>
Alec and I DO NOT FEAR YOU. This comic symbolizes our unity Against You.
http://i48.tinypic.com/zv90s7.jpg}}

===Savage love===
''Before you click any links, please be aware that the image is of some neckbeard's asshole.''
{{Email|From: adamsavage@discovery.com

Hey Chris its [[Wikipedia:Adam Savage|Adam Savage]] from Myth Busters here! Yes THE Adam Savage! I love your comics and I saw your most recent video telling that damn Asperchu Parody off and how you want them to suck your balls while you stick your middle finger so far up their ass! Righteous man!

I got to thinking about it… And hey you know… I’m am open guy and I say we should try and bust some myths together. Perhaps we could start with the myth about you being homosexual! I’m pretty sure I know the results! I know some great ways we can test it too! You, Jamie, and myself can get together and have a wild night busting that myth wide open so EVERYONE will finally know the truth!

I’ve included a picture of myself doing some very special poses for you and Sonichu so you know its REALLY ME! I hope you like the picture I was thinking of you and your comic series when I took it.

http://bayimg.com/BAjodaaCN

Sincerely yours,

-Adam
P.S. What was your favorite episode on myth busters? Mine has to be the one where we launched the liquid nitrogen frozen butterball turkeys.}}
{{Mailbag}}

Talk:100 2265

2010-10-10T00:44:25Z

Svek:

{{Not A Forum}}
I made the page...I'm not even going to attempt to transcribe this BITCH because he only says rabble rabble the whole time...someone with a keen ear would be better at it than me. --[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 21:14, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
:Yeah, the only thing I can really understand is him saying onions, PICKLES, cheese towards the end.--[[User:Straw|Straw]] 21:32, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
::I believe he is supposed to be the Hamburgler and he may be using that old jingle from the 70s about McDonalds. Uh, shit. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 21:32, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
:::K would be great if you could use the previous video articles as a template. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 21:40, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
::It's the ingredients for a Big Mac (which is the picture shown on his TV)...except he screwed it up. Chris messed up the order and forgot to mention lettuce (Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun) [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Mac |Big Mac]--[[User:Captkrisma|Captkrisma]] 14:19, 4 October 2010 (PDT)
Chris tries to look and act like the Hamburglar, but he comes off as creepy as Voldo. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 22:00, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
:that's nice, please don't add useless comments like these see top kthx [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 22:03, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
Fixed a few of the unknowns, but I'm stuck on if there should be a bracketed comment by the word "bun" he definitely meant to say "bun," but it sounds like "gin" or "chin" the same for "all beef patties" the slogan is "all" but it sounds more like "whole" and I cannot figure out what the "deep frying" one is --[[User:TastyKayKs|TastyKayKs]] 22:07, 3 October 2010 (PDT)

==Tape==
He's not wearing black tape, those are more like black strings of black paper or cloth, joined by tape, if it were black tape it wouldn't fall off his chest--[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 22:23, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
* http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bondage_tape --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 23:58, 3 October 2010 (PDT)
** No, you can see he's taped it together. My money's on construction paper. --[[User:KarryLing|KarryLing]] 00:28, 4 October 2010 (PDT)
*** It's construction paper cut into strips and taped around him. --[[User:Svek|Švek]] 17:44, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

== Is this video edited? ==

The pitch of his voice in some parts does not sound natural. [[User:Enibure|Enibure]] 07:52, 4 October 2010 (PDT)
:I think this has more to do with a hormonal imbalance, considering the fact that Chris is a genetic trainwreck. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 08:07, 4 October 2010 (PDT)

== Kudos to the transcribers ==
If it weren't for you guys, I wouldn't have the slightest idea of what Chris was saying/doing at all. That boy is BROKEN. 0_0 [[User:Cadpig|- Cadpig]] 10:55, 4 October 2010 (PDT)
:this is also an example of useless post ''do not do it'' [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 15:23, 4 October 2010 (PDT)

Jerkop Punislav

2010-10-09T22:55:18Z

Svek:

[[Image:PunislavBarrier.jpg|thumb|ORIGINAL CHARACTER HASBRO PLZ DON'T SUE]]

'''Jerkop Punislav''' (Джэркоп Пунислав) is the official police cruiser/[[Samurai Pizza Bots|decepti-clone]] of the [[Jerkop|Jerk Operation Squad]]. The Punislav's design is based off either the 2006-present Dodge Charger police package or the 2005-2009 Ford Mustang Police package, although it's more likely the latter, as Chris can only [[Transformers|replicate what Michael Bay shows]] to his stupid autistic brain.

Punislav is one of the most obvious ripoffs that he has created, with almost every feature (with the notable exception of the paintjob) an exact copy of Barricade.

The inscription on the side of Punislav reads "To Shatter and Torture All Hearts".

The Punislav was most likely created because Chris got [[Chris and the Law|one too many speeding tickets]], so he decided to pretend all [[Virginia]] State Troopers were all [[Jerkops|big, mean robots]] out to kill him, when in fact, they're trying to protect the [[slow-in-the-minds|noble residents of Virginia]] from Christian's shitty driving.

All Punislav cruisers registered in [[CWCville]] are required to have a brown/gray color scheme, effectively making them look like big logs of shit on wheels, an attribute making it so blatantly obvious that he hates the police, that it earns Christian 1 axe to [[Bob Walks In|cut down his internet.]]

Why is this evil police robot called "Punislav"? Does he have [[Molvanîa|Slavic]] origins? Nah. It's just that Chris wanted to name him "Punislave" (from the inscription "To Punish and Enslave" on the side of Barricade), but [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|was afraid to use the word "slave"]], probably because he thinks it means "[[niggo]]". However, the "-slav" suffix implies that the character is Slavic, and since the Slavs are an ethnic group, this is yet another display (albeit unintentionally) of Chris's racism.

==See also:==
{{CWCipedia}}
*[[Son-Chu]]
*[[Jerkops]]
*[[Samurai Pizza Bots]]
*[[Transformers]]

{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Transformers]]
[[Category:Villains]]

Talk:Jerkop Punislav

2010-10-09T16:54:41Z

Svek:

Actually, it seems to me that Punislav's name comes from the inscription on the side of Barricade from the Michael Bay movie 'To Punish and Enslave', instead of 'To Serve and Protect' that adorns most American police cars. This is in my mind the most likely source of the name, proving even further that Chris is completely bankrupt creatively and that the character is a huge ripoff. Thoughts? --[[User:Ronichu]], 11:34am Australian Central Standard Time, 11th March 2010

I think this is correct, and have added it to the article.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 09:54, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Jerkop Punislav

2010-10-09T16:54:26Z

Svek:

Actually, it seems to me that Punislav's name comes from the inscription on the side of Barricade from the Michael Bay movie 'To Punish and Enslave', instead of 'To Serve and Protect' that adorns most American police cars. This is in my mind the most likely source of the name, proving even further that Chris is completely bankrupt creatively and that the character is a huge ripoff. Thoughts? --[[User:Ronichu]], 11:34am Australian Central Standard Time, 11th March 2010
I think this is correct, and have added it to the article.--[[User:Svek|Švek]] 09:54, 9 October 2010 (PDT)

Jerkop Punislav

2010-10-09T16:53:42Z

Svek:

[[Image:PunislavBarrier.jpg|thumb|ORIGINAL CHARACTER HASBRO PLZ DON'T SUE]]

'''Jerkop Punislav''' (or Джэркоп Пунислав) is the official police cruiser/[[Samurai Pizza Bots|decepti-clone]] of the [[Jerkop|Jerk Operation Squad]]. The Punislav's design is based off either the 2006-present Dodge Charger police package or the 2005-2009 Ford Mustang Police package, although it's more likely the latter, as Chris can only [[Transformers|replicate what Michael Bay shows]] to his stupid autistic brain.

Punislav is one of the most obvious ripoffs that he has created, with almost every feature (with the notable exception of the paintjob) an exact copy of Barricade.

The inscription on the side of Punislav reads "To Shatter and Torture All Hearts".

The Punislav was most likely created because Chris got [[Chris and the Law|one too many speeding tickets]], so he decided to pretend all [[Virginia]] State Troopers were all [[Jerkops|big, mean robots]] out to kill him, when in fact, they're trying to protect the [[slow-in-the-minds|noble residents of Virginia]] from Christian's shitty driving.

All Punislav cruisers registered in [[CWCville]] are required to have a brown/gray color scheme, effectively making them look like big logs of shit on wheels, an attribute making it so blatantly obvious that he hates the police, that it earns Christian 1 axe to [[Bob Walks In|cut down his internet.]]

Why is this evil police robot called "Punislav"? Does he have [[Molvanîa|Slavic]] origins? Nah. It's just that Chris wanted to name him "Punislave" (from the inscription "To Punish and Enslave" on the side of Barricade), but [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|was afraid to use the word "slave"]], probably because he thinks it means "[[niggo]]". However, the "-slav" suffix implies that the character is Slavic, and since the Slavs are an ethnic group, this is yet another display (albeit unintentionally) of Chris's racism.

==See also:==
{{CWCipedia}}
*[[Son-Chu]]
*[[Jerkops]]
*[[Samurai Pizza Bots]]
*[[Transformers]]

{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Transformers]]
[[Category:Villains]]

100 2269

2010-10-08T03:09:56Z

Svek:

[[File:paul-mccartney.jpg|thumb|Paul reacts]]

'''100 2269''' is the second of three videos [[Chris]] uploaded on 7 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris has [[Gitar of Fail]] out again, but this time actually uses it to play The Beatles's "[[Wikipedia:A Day in the Life|A Day in the Life]]" on [[Wikipedia:The Beatles: Rock Band|The Beatles: Rock Band]]. In addition, he warbles tunelessly along with the track. He mentions Jackie at least once in the video, saying he will [[Rape|"turn her on"]]. Chris is wearing what appears to be a poorly done replica of a Sgt. Pepper costume, crafted in construction paper.

Thus far, Chris has [[Chris and Music|never shown any interest in the Beatles]], so it is reasonable to assume Chris did this for Jackie.

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2269
| video = {{#ev:youtube|tGQjcZxXtZo}}
| stardate = 7 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{VertBlueGrayShirt|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| previous = [[100 2267]]
| next = [[100 2270]]
}}

===Transcription===

[[File:Mark David Chapman.jpg|thumb|Mark David Chapman killed one of the Beatles. Chris killed one of the Beatles' songs. Coincidence?]]

''[In a bad cockney accent]'' Hello loves, good evening there. I'm Paul McCartney and I'm going to sing you a song. It's "A Day In The Life". And it is a good day. In the life. Yeah. It's a day for livin', it's a beautiful day over here in [[Ruckersville, VA|Virginia]]. Rock on [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|England]]!

''[Mic effect]'' Good evening, loves.

''[Starts playing on the gitar]''

I'll read the news today oh boy 
About a luucky man who made the [[Honor Roll|grade]] 
And though the news was. b.. rather sad! 
I just had to laugh 
I saw the photograph 
He blew his mind out in the car 
He didn't notice that the lights had changed 
A crowd of people stood and [[The Creepy Stare|stared]] 
They'd seen his face before 
Nobody was really sure... he from... house of lords... the lords

I saw a film today oh boy 
The English army had just won the war 
A crowd of people turned away 
But I just had to look 
Haa..ving read the [[How to Talk to Girls|book]] 

I love to tuuuurn youuu oon...

Woo...

''[Chris misses many notes in the solo]''

Woke up, feell out of bed, dragged a comb across myy head... 
Found my way downstairs and drank a [[Fanta|cup]] 
And looking up I had a tickle...uh...huh...huh (?) 
Found my coat and grabbed my hat 
Made the bus in seconds flat 
Found my way upstairs and had a [[tobacky|smoke]], 
and Somebody spoke and said...eh...uh 

Aahhaaahhhhhahahaaaaaaahhh

I read the news today oh boy 
Four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire 
And though the holes were rather small 
They had to count them all 
Now they know how many holes to fill the Bert Hall 
I'd love to turn you on 

Yeah Jackie, [[For J-R's Eyes Only|I'd love to turn you on]] too girl. ''[Chuckles]''

''[Plays to the end, pointlessly hitting the whammy bar]''

Longest note you've ever heard, huh? I wish it would end already... Jeez, will ya end already ya dang note?

''[At 5:23 a high-pitched feedback noise can be heard, which lasts till the end of the video.]''

''[Goes to turn camera off]''

I'll spare you the sentiments.

==See also==
*[[100 2267]]
*[[100 2270]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2267]]|nextlink=[[100 2270]]}}
{{Music Videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

100 2270

2010-10-08T00:50:19Z

Svek:

'''100 2270''' is the third of three videos [[Chris]] uploaded on 7 [[October 2010]]. In it, he does a painful impression of [[Alec Benson Leary]] in a strange, nasally, voice in an attempt to mock him. Half the time his insults are [[Chris and English|unintelligible]] and his assumed, Eric Cartman-like accent does nothing to aid his insults.

Chris appears to confuse Alec with [[Liquid Chris]] at several points. This is either Chris being the idiot he is or it means he believes that Liquid and Alec are the same person. He also proceeds to beat the dead horse about not only how Alec put [[Homos|homosexual imagery in Asperchu]], but about how violent Asperchu can be. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|Because we all know that Sonichu doesn't have]] [[Sonichu 10|gore, violence and needless killing of characters]], right?

Chris also claims AlecLiquid is from [[Wikipedia:Philadelphia, PA|Philadelphia, PA]], whereas Alec is actually from Minnesota and Liquid hails from Washington DC.

Chris continues the trend of using construction paper props, and the [[Asperchu Medallion]] makes a reappearance in this video.

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2270
| video = {{#ev:youtube|l8ir2SbF5T4}}
| stardate = 7 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Rage|text}}
| shirt = {{PityShirt|text}}
| previous = [[100 2269]]
| next = Current
}}

=== Transcription ===

''[Chris's face is partially obscured by darkness due to the lighting in his room. A large piece of cardboard with horizontal orange and grey stripes covers most of his chest. The Asperchu medallion is visible around his neck.]''

''[Odd voice]'' Ello, web! Dis is Christian Weston Chandler 'ere! But I'm no-I'm not really Christian Weston Chandler, and I'm not the creator of Sonichu because I live in Philidelphia! I was born in Philidelphia! At least as far as I know. [[Things Chris has ripped off|I don't have any originality]], or idea points because I never put up a page of my own! In real life, and still I only mock the real Christian Weston Chandler in Virginia-and now I am mocking Alec Benson Leary, ''[grabs Asperchu medallion]'' I am pretending to be Alec Benson Leary, oh look at me I'm Alec, [[Chris and Art|I draw teeeerrribly]], ''[mimes drawing]'' I draw everything in squares, I put [[homos]]exual drawings in the background, [[Death threats|I kill everybody!]] I put gore all over the floor and blood all over the place, ''[flails arms and shifts from foot to foot]'' I killed the real Christian Weston Chandler, I even killed the origina-I even killed the second dude, who pretended to be the original!

''[pauses for breath]''

Anyway, I'm Christian Chandler, I live in Philidelphia, I have a girlfriend, her name is [[Kacey]], ''[more arm-flailing]'' except we're married now! And [[Chris and his ego|she coulda had the real Christian Weston Chandler]], who lives in Virginia, except I'm just a Christian Chandler who lives in Philidelphia! Now I'm sorry, [[Honor roll|I didn't mean Philidelphia, I meant to say Pennsylvania!]] Pennsylvania! But I pretended to be the original Christian Weston Chandler and rent movies from Blockbuster in Peennsylvaniaa! And the phone call was sent to the real deal, the real man in Virginia.

Yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda yadda yaddblahblahblahyahbahblahyablahlalalalalah!

''[Pause]''

[[Britney Spears|Hey baby hit me one more time!]] I done it from my head! Bye now!

==See also==
*[[100 2267]]
*[[100 2269]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2269]]|nextlink=Current}}
{{Troll Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

100 2269

2010-10-08T00:44:02Z

Svek: transcript

[[File:paul-mccartney.jpg|thumb|Paul reacts]]

'''100 2269''' is the second of three videos [[Chris]] uploaded on 7 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris has [[Gitar of Fail]] out again, but this time actually uses it to play The Beatles's "[[Wikipedia:A Day in the Life|A Day in the Life]]" on [[Wikipedia:The Beatles: Rock Band|The Beatles: Rock Band]]. In addition, he warbles tunelessly along with the track. He mentions Jackie at least once in the video, saying he will [[Rape|"turn her on"]]. Chris is wearing what appears to be a poorly done replica of a Sgt. Pepper costume, crafted in construction paper.

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2269
| video = {{#ev:youtube|tGQjcZxXtZo}}
| stardate = 7 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{VertBlueGrayShirt|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| previous = [[100 2267]]
| next = [[100 2270]]
}}

===Transcription===

''[In a bad cockney accent]'' Hello loves, good evening there. I'm Paul McCartney and I'm going to sing you a song. It's "A Day In The Life". And it is a good day. In the life. Yeah. It's a day for livin', it's a beautiful day over here in Virginia. Rock on England!

''[Mic effect]'' Good evening, loves.

''[Starts playing on the gitar]''

I'll read the news today oh boy 
About a luucky man who made the grade 
And though the news was. b.. rather sad! 
I just had to laugh 
I saw the photograph 
He blew his mind out in the car 
He didn't notice that the lights had changed 
A crowd of people stood and stared 
They'd seen his face before 
Nobody was really sure... he from.. house of lords... the lords

I saw a film today oh boy 
The English army had just won the war 
A crowd of people turned away 
But I just had to look 
Haa..ving read the book 

I love to tuuuurn youuu oon...

Woo...

''[Chris misses many notes in the solo]''

Woke up, feell out of bed, dragged a comb across myy head... 
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup 
And looking up I had a tickle...uh..huh..huh (?) 
Found my coat and grabbed my hat 
Made the bus in seconds flat 
Found my way upstairs and had a [[tobacky|smoke]], 
and Somebody spoke and said...eh..uh 

Aahhaaahhhhhahahaaaaaaahhh

I read the news today oh boy 
Four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire 
And though the holes were rather small 
They had to count them all 
Now they know how many holes to fill the Bert Hall 
I'd love to turn you on 

Yeah Jackie, [[For J-R's Eyes Only|I'd love to turn you on]] too girl. ''[Chuckles]''

''[Plays to the end, hitting the whammy bar]''

Longest note you've ever heard, huh? I wish it would end already... Jeez, will ya end already ya dang notes?

''[At 5:23 a high-pitched feedback noise can be heard, which lasts till the end of the video.]''

''[Goes to turn camera off]''

I'll spare you the sentiments.

==See also==
*[[100 2267]]
*[[100 2270]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2267]]|nextlink=[[100 2270]]}}
{{Music Videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]