https://sonichu.com/w/api.php?action=feedcontributions&feedformat=atom&user=Thedarkcloud4CWCki - User contributions [en]2026-04-29T21:16:01ZUser contributionsMediaWiki 1.37.6https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Thriller&diff=153897Thriller2011-12-06T11:44:45Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
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<div>'''Thriller''' is the 14th track from ''[[SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD]]'' by [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]]. It is a cover of the song [[Wikipedia:Thriller (song)|Thriller]] by [[Wikipedia:Michael Jackson|Michael Jackson]].<br />
<br />
One of Michael Jackson's most famous songs and an iconic track in pop music history, ''Thriller'' makes reference to the themes of classic 1950's horror cinema, and has absolutely nothing to do with cross-dressing. Why Chris included it on an album of [[Tomgirl]]-themed songs is anyone's guess.<br />
<br />
== Audio ==<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = "Thriller"<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Zh3jPsggKAY}}<br />
| stardate = [[November 2011]]<br />
| subject = {{Music|text}}<br />
| style = {{Comedy|text}} {{Crazy|text}}<br />
| saga = {{Jackie|text}} {{Tomgirl|text}}<br />
| shirt = <br />
| other = {{Leaked|text}}<br />
| previous = [[CWCALICIOUS]]<br />
| next = <br />
}}<br />
=== Lyrics ===<br />
''[sung over Michael Jackson's "Thriller"]''<br />
<br />
<br />
Its close to midnight-night!<br><br />
Something evils lurkin in the dark.<br><br />
Under-der moon light, you see a [[Tomgirl Pictures|sights thats almost stops your heart]].<br />
<br />
You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it<br><br />
''(anticipating start of line)''y-y-you start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes,<br><br />
You're paralyzed!<br />
<br />
Cause this is thriller! Thriller night!<br><br />
No ones gonna save you from the beast about to strike.<br><br />
Th-the thriller! Thriller night!<br><br />
''(speeds ahead of [[Mike Jackson]])''<br />
You're fightin-fightin for your life inside a killer thriller tonight!<br />
<br />
You hear the door-sloor slam<br><br />
And realize there’s nowhere left to run.<br><br />
You feel the cold hand and wonder if you’ll ever see the sun.<br><br />
You close your eyes, and hope that this is just imagination girl!<br><br />
<br />
But all, all the while, you hear the creature creeping up behind.<br><br />
You’re out of time!<br />
<br />
Cause this is thriller, thriller night,<br><br />
Ain’t no second chance against the thing with forty eyes, girl,<br><br />
Thriller, Thriller night!<br><br />
You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight!<br><br />
<br />
C-creatures calling, dead start to walk in their masquerade.(Struggles to pronounce this word)<br><br />
There's no escapin’ the jaws of the alien dis time … they’re open wide!<br><br />
This is the end of your life.<br><br />
<br />
‘Bout to get-shit you, [mumbling] on every side.<br><br />
They will possess you, unless you change that number on your dial.<br><br />
Now this the time, for you and I to cuddle close together, yeah!<br><br />
Oh, all through the night, I’ll save you from the terror on the screen.<br><br />
I’ll make you see.<br><br />
<br />
That this is thrillaaa, thriller night<br><br />
Cause I can drill you more than any ghosts would ever dare try,<br><br />
Thriller! Thriller night!<br><br />
Let me hold you tight and share a killer, diller chiller shriller here tonight!<br><br />
Cause this is thriller, thriller night!<br><br />
Girl, I can drill you more than any ghosts would ever dare try,<br><br />
Thriller! Thriler night!<br><br />
[[Jackie]], let me hold you tight and share a killer, thriller, ow!<br><br />
<br />
Gonna thrill you tonight!<br />
<br />
''(Vincent Price begins his monologue, Chris misses the start)''<br />
…ness has crossed the land<br><br />
The midnight hour is close at hand<br><br />
Creatures crawl in search of blooood<br><br />
To terrorize ya’lls neighborhood!<br><br />
I’m thrillyoutonight …<br><br />
(Incoherant mumbling, thankfully drowned out by Vincent Price. Sounds like he’s quietly repeating the lines.)<br />
<br />
I’m gonna thrill you tonight! Oh baby!<br><br />
I'm gonna thrill tonight! Oh Jackie Baby!<br><br />
Thriller night baby! Ooooohh<br><br />
Baby, Jackie, baby. Ooh I’m gonna thrill you tonight!<br />
<br />
[[Chris_and_health#Hygiene|Foul stench]] in the air, the funk of [[Bob|forty-thousand years]],<br><br />
And grizzly ghouls from every tomb,<br><br />
Are closing in to seal to your doom.<br><br />
<br />
And though you [[CWCFighter|fight]] to stay alive, your body starts to shiver.<br><br />
For no mere mortal can resist;<br><br />
The evil of the Thri'''LLAR'''!<br><br />
''(Ending laugh cuts off after almost a second)''<br />
<br />
[[Category:SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD]]<br />
{{The Tomgirls}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Sailor_Moon_Poster_of_Fail&diff=128818Sailor Moon Poster of Fail2010-12-07T13:59:14Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
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<div>[[Image:Poster_of_Fail.jpg|thumb|Pedofork... Prism... Power!]]<br />
<br />
Coerced into saying he was gay on [[YouTube]], [[Christian Weston Chandler]] employed several nonverbal clues to signal to his [[Trolls|fans]] that he was, in fact, straight. Among these was the '''[[Sailor Moon]] Poster of Fail''', which Chris later explained he looks at every night to help keep him straight.<ref>[[Chris Destroys His Vibrator]]</ref> (While Chris doesn't realize how much irony he's created, as some, if not most, people would assume a man was [[Homos|gay]] if he had a poster of Sailor Moon on his [[The Wall of Originals|wall]].)<br />
<br />
In typical lulzcow fashion, the revelation that he needed an object to remind him of his shaky (and possibly fictitious) heterosexuality only served to tarnish Chris's reputation even further. This is not the first time that Chris has referred to heterosexuality as a status he struggles daily to maintain, nor is this the first indication of his [[Kimmi|sick lust for anime girls]]. <br />
<br />
What is new is that of all the posters he could have chosen, Chris uses one that prominently features [[Wikipedia:Chibiusa|Chibiusa]], [[Sailor Moon]]'s prepubescent [[Daughter|daughter from the future]]. In short, he looks at a fetishized cartoon eight-year-old to reinforce his sexual appetites. But even if he didn't, according to Wikipedia, Sailor Moon, is in fact, [[Wikipedia:Sailor Moon (character)|14-16 years old]], so it doesn't matter which one he looks at, he is still a [[pedofork]]. (Note that in Japan, the age of consent is considerably younger - around 13 or 14 years in some areas - so she would probably be perfectly of age in her trans-Pacific homeland. Of course, not only does Chris still live in America, but Chibiusa would still be pedobait...)<br />
<br />
It also has to be noted that like many young [[anime]] females, Sailor Moon's future daughter is distinctly tomboyish in appearance, which only strengthens claims that he is a [[homos|homo]] pedofork.<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Gaybian]]<br />
*[[Chris and sex]]<br />
*[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]<br />
*[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009]]<br />
*[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 6th, 2009]]<br />
*[[Sailor Megtune]]<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
{{stub}}<br />
{{Relics of Fail}}<br />
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]<br />
[[Category:Homos]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=14_Branchland_Court&diff=12835214 Branchland Court2010-12-06T13:44:56Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* See also */</p>
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<div>{{Honest}}<br />
<center>{{#ev:youtube|meAO487S0zM}}</center><br />
{{quote|One does not simply walk into 14 Branchland Court. There is evil there that does not sleep, and the great Man-child is ever watchful. It is a barren wasteland, riddled with video games and sex toys, the very air you breath is a poisonous fume. Not with ten thousand men could you do this, it is folly.|[[YouTube]] comment, dragonslayer396}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:Fullfrontalfilth.gif|thumb|The most complete view of the front. Note the [[Sonichu]] drawn in the snow.]]<br />
[[Image:CWCHouse.jpg|thumb|Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.]]<br />
[[Image:Chris house.jpg|thumb|Aerial shot of the house.]]<br />
[[Image:Chandlerhousegooglemaps.jpg|thumb|Another aerial image of the Chandler House.]]<br />
[[Image:BranchlandCourt.jpg|thumb|A more awesome (and badass, and more accurate) depiction of 14 Branchland Court]]<br />
<br />
'''14 Branchland Court''' is the lair of the [[Chandler]] clan. It is a white (now yellowed to ivory) two-story house trimmed in [[homos|pink]] (faded from a dark red) with three bedrooms on the outskirts of [[Ruckersville, VA]]. The property is near the intersection of Branchland Court and Westwood Drive, facing northwest. The house itself reeks of the early [[1980s]], having tacky fake shutters and vinyl siding; it probably hasn't been re-sided in years. As a result of its dated look, in addition to the decaying gardens and overgrown yard, it has done a number on local property values.<br />
<br />
As of [[2009#March|March 2009]], all space not used for walking or sleeping appeared to be packed full of junk. However, in earlier pictures (those of [[Chris]]'s twentieth birthday [2002], for instance), the house was once quite tidy. In his [[Tour of Christian's House|video tour]], Chris also keeps referring to the fact that "things got cluttered," suggesting that the house has grown fuller and fuller in the past decade. "Clutter" is, of course, a horrible understatement. The house is packed with crap. Its former living room is unusable, with junk filling the entire space and reaching within two feet of the ceiling. Similarly, other rooms are full of junk, but rather than solid blocks of shit, there are small crevices with chairs, TVs, and other furnishings.<br />
<br />
[[THAT IS MY HOUSE]] revealed that Chris's parents are aware of the house's condition (what with the junk being both a health hazard and a fire hazard), and fear that [[Tour of Christian's House|Chris's video tours]] may elicit the attention of the [http://www.vdh.state.va.us/LHD/ThomasJefferson/Greene/ Health Department of Greene County] resulting in their home being condemned. Trolls made several calls to the health department in hopes of spurring such a process into action, but their efforts proved fruitless.<br />
<br />
Chris [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|claimed]] to have put forth some effort towards cleaning up the house in early 2010, but the "back-breaking" tasks he describes amount to simple maintenance, like vacuuming and scrubbing the floors. He talks about this as if he is making great progress in fixing the disaster area that is 14 Branchland Court, but his efforts appear to be just enough to keep him from [[Vivitheg's AIM chat|slipping on cat shit]] on a regular basis.<br />
<br />
Chris also claimed that Bob used to use a computer, but Barbara bought an enormous amount of crap from Goodwill, blocking off the computer. Apparently Bob was too lazy, or unwilling to provoke a fight, as he just stopped using the computer.<ref>[[Jackie Chat 8]]</ref><br />
==History==<br />
Chris lived at 14 Branchland Court from the time he was born until his family moved him to the Richmond area, some distance away, in order to escape the [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Greene County]] public school system's attempts to pull him out of mainstream schools. After the move, which took place in the fall of 1992, Chris and his father lived in the Richmond suburbs while his mother held down the fort in Ruckersville so she could continue working for the local electric power authority until retirement. Barbara joined them after retiring a few years later.<br />
<br />
The Chandlers moved back to the Ruckersville house in 2000 after Chris graduated high school. In a [[100 2178|video]] released in May 2010, Chris claims that his family tried and failed to sell the house at some point, and would have stayed in the Richmond suburbs if they had been able to find a buyer. (He attributes the house's failure to sell to a conspiracy between local realtors and the Greene County school system; but, as this article will explain, it probably went unsold for more practical reasons.)<br />
<br />
==The Tour==<br />
{{main|Tour of Chris's House}}<br />
<br />
In two videos uploaded on [[2009#March|27 March 2009]], Chris provides a tour of his house and the property that it's on. Like his own room, Chris's entire house is a disaster area. Several rooms are so full of shit that Chris cannot enter them. <br />
<br />
What follows is a brief description of the rooms and other areas of 14 Branchland Court.<br />
<br />
==First floor==<br />
In the north corner is what Christian describes as "the music room," which is now primarily the domain of [[Barbara Chandler]], who frequently sleeps there. A small bathroom is directly in front of the stairs leading up to the front door. On the other end of a short hallway is the utility room, in which the family keeps a refrigerator in addition to the usual washer and dryer. The family room (possibly in the west corner) has been claimed by [[Bob Chandler]], who apparently sleeps there as well. If Chris's parents ever had, or used, dedicated bedrooms in the house, they have yet to be filmed.<br />
<br />
==Second floor==<br />
[[Image:411-CWCWeekP5 crop 2.jpg|thumb|right|[[Barbara]] moving Chris's earthly possessions from [[Richmond]] back to the living room in [[April 2000]]. The junk was already amassing.]]<br />
<br />
[[Chris's room]] is in the northern corner of the second floor. Across the hallway, near the eastern corner, is a filthy bathroom, which apparently has not been cleaned in years, as implied by the layers of dark brown or green mold growing in the shower and the peeling of the veneer on the cabinetry. The kitchen and dining area are apparently near the southern corner and southwestern wall. The computer Chris uses for internet access seems to be in this part of the house, as is a Christmas tree left up year-round. Tellingly, Chris has actually photographed himself with [[Officer Nasty]] and [[sex toys|dildos]] in the kitchen, and has even [[mass debating|mass debated]] over a webcam feed. This implies that Snorlax and Bob never actually leave the areas in which they sleep and spend their days there, leaving Chris free to do [[sex tape|whatever he wants]] undisturbed. The living room, packed with boxes and shit, is across the stairway from Chris's room.<br />
<br />
==Yard==<br />
On first examination, you'd be forgiven for mistaking Chris's yard for Silent Hill. It consists of some simple crossed wood planters near the curb and some small shrubs and trees out front. The plants in the planters have long since [[Chris and death|died]], probably due to a [[Dirty crapped briefs|foul stench]] poisoning the air. The backyard contains a shed and a small platform leading to a back entrance. The shed is full of shit, most notably a car, and was once the place where the Lumberjack would tinker with machines. After that, there are some trees and the pen where [[Patti]] once played. Her doghouse still stands, and she is buried nearby. At some point, a tree branch fell on the grave. Being the pansy-ass he is, Chris cannot muster the strength to pick the damn thing up. [[/cwc/|Some]] have speculated that this is [[GodJesus|divine intervention]], in order to keep Patti's body safe from Chris and his [[Rule 34|furry]] tendencies.<br />
<br />
However, in earlier pictures (when Chris was less huge and he had yet to start the [[fuck quest]]), we can see that the yard used to be quite lush and beautiful, with a variety of flowers planted around the area, the grass clipped, and healthy trees. Many people speculate that over the years Chris's parents have gotten too old or too lazy to care for their garden, leaving the area neglected.<br />
<br />
As of [[August 2010]], it is very apparent that Chris's parents have completely given up on lawn care, with none of the grass cut at all. Many of the grass and weeds surrounding the house are almost four feet tall, obscuring many parts of the residence altogether.<br />
<br />
==Mail==<br />
{{quote|Hand-Written and Hand-Drawn Submissions are also accepted, ONLY addressed to: Christian Weston Chandler 14 Branchland Ct. Ruckersville, VA 22968. ALL letters addressed to any NAME other than "Christian Weston Chandler" or "Christopher Weston Chandler", will be Immediately disposed of with Paper Recyling, or be "Returned to Sender" with a frown face on it. ALL Visually Grotesque, Shocking and Offensive art works and letters will be disposed of properly as well.|Chris on contacting him, [http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=CWCipedia:Copyrights CWCipedia]}}<br />
<br />
If you would like to send an envelope containing anthrax to Christian, or perhaps mail his parents some of the many [[nudes|NOODZ]] he has posted on the internets in recent times, you can contact him at:<br />
<br />
:''Christian Weston Chandler,''<br />
:''14 Branchland Court,''<br />
:''[[Ruckersville]],''<br />
:''VA 22968-9545,''<br />
:''[[United States of America]]''<br />
<br />
'''NOTE:'''<br />
:Based on previous experience with mail, it is likely that one of two things will happen to the letter should you choose to send it: 1) It will be intercepted by Chris, who apparently takes his parents' mail on a regular basis, or 2) Barbara and Bob will receive it, and dismiss it as old news (reports show that they have read some of the letters and ignored them).<br />
<br />
Chris will respond to fan mail, provided there's a return address on the envelope.<br />
<br />
==Visiting==<br />
Visits to 14 Branchland Court, at least until Chris inherits the house and promptly trades the deed to a troll for some magic beans so said troll can found the ''Christian Weston Chandler Museum of Fail,'' are ill-advised. While a troll who does manage to make it to the front door will probably not be assaulted by Chris, they will most likely face Chris as he calls for his elderly parents to fight his battle or perform a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]].<br />
<br />
To date, Chris has extended personalized invitations to [[Clyde Cash]], [[Liquid Chris]], the staff of [[Asperchu#Asperpedia|Asperpedia]], and pretty much anybody that has ever thought ill of Chris to come to his house, so that he might [[Death threats|murder them]]. To date, none of them has taken him up on his offer. The scenario of such a meeting would likely be reminiscent of the [[hooker incident]], wherein the police would be promptly summoned whilst Chris hides, crying, behind the shield of flesh that is his mother.<br />
<br />
==Chris and his address==<br />
Giving away one's home address on the Internet is generally considered unwise. Possibly Chris didn't realize this, or perhaps he realizes that [[trolls]] have so thoroughly and permanently violated his privacy that attempting to preserve it is a lost cause. In any case, he has publicly announced his home address on a number of occasions, in YouTube videos and elsewhere.<br />
<br />
* Shortly after 21 July 2009, when [[CChanSonichuCWC]] released a video promoting his Sonichu merchandise, Chris posted his address in a YouTube comment in hopes of a physical confrontation with the "impostor."<br />
* On 14 August 2009, in the video [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!]], Chris rattled off his address as a way of attempting to prove his identity.<br />
* He did the same thing in his [[CWC Public Disclaimer]], also released on 14 August 2009.<br />
* On 23 November 2009, in the [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|Sonichu Presentation]], Chris provided his address (as well as his home and mobile phone numbers) in hopes of attracting investment in his comic-book characters.<br />
* On 15 January 2010, Chris released a [[15 January 2010|video]] where he summoned the creators of the Asperpedia to his home address for a confrontation.<br />
* On 27 August 2010, Chris gave out his address and phone number in a [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|YouTube video]] seeking to organize a high-school reunion. In the same video, he warned viewers to be careful with their personal information on the internet, taking his anti-grasp of irony to incredible new levels.<br />
* Chris has published his address on his websites at various times. It was available at the bottom of the main page on the [[CWCipedia]] for most of the time Chris used the site.<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris's room]]<br />
*[[Chris's kitchen]]<br />
*[[Ruckersville, VA]]<br />
*[[Charlottesville, VA]]<br />
*[[Tour of Christian's House]]<br />
*[[Chris's homes]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
Other famous hoarders:<br />
*[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Collyer_brothers The Collyer Brothers] (infamous NY hoarders who ended up being crushed to death by their own shit)<br />
*[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edmund_Trebus Edmund Trebus] (eccentric Polish immigrant who ended up being a TV star because of his hoarding)<br />
<br />
{{Places}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Places]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_phrases_Chris_copied_from_media&diff=127468List of phrases Chris copied from media2010-11-29T18:54:14Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Seth MacFarlane shows */</p>
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<div>It is no secret that Chris spends a [[Chris and health|healthy]] portion of his day watching Television shows. His preferences become apparent not only because he will constantly force you to listen to him talk about them, but also because Chris, in his infinite [[Chris and copyright|originality]], likes to take phrases and sentences from shows and use them word by word in his everyday [[Chris and English|speech]]. This article attempts to list all of these occurrences, especially those he has used repeatedly.<br />
<br />
==Seth MacFarlane shows==<br />
<br />
[[Wikipedia:Seth MacFarlane|Seth MacFarlane]] is the creator of the animated comedies ''[[Family Guy]]'', ''[[The Cleveland Show]]'' and ''American Dad!''<br />
<br />
;Blocky low resolution<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: When referring to ''Asperchu'' 's inferiority, e.g. [[Mailbag 41]], [[Mailbag 42|42]], [[Mailbag 43|43]] and [[Mailbag 45|45]]<br><br />
*Origin: ''Family Guy'': "[[Wikipedia:Road to the Multiverse|Road to the Multiverse]]"<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
;Grinds my gears<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: The [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Homosexuality CWCipedia page on homosexuality], [[Mailbag 2]]<br><br />
*Origin: ''Family Guy'''s "[[Wikipedia:Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story|Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story]]" episode: Peter gets his own segment, "You Know What Really Grinds My Gears?", talking about things that annoy him, or "grind [his] gears"<br><br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
;Insert rod "A" into slot "B"<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: [[Sonichu 8]], Page 1<br />
*Origin: The line was originally said in the ''Family Guy'' episode "[[Wikipedia:Emission Impossible|Emission Impossible]]", when Peter is making a crib for the other baby he and Lois expect to have. Brian, reading the instructions, says, "Insert rod 'A' into slot 'B'." Peter responds by saying "That's what she sa-" and is then cut off by Brian saying, "If you say 'That's what she said' one more time, I'm gonna pop you."<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
;iRitz<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: [[Mailbag 51]]<br />
*Origin: ''The Cleveland Show'': "[[Wikipedia:Love Rollercoaster|Love Rollercoaster]]" - A joke in which Cleveland is Steve Jobs and invents the edible cellphone, the iRitz. <br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
;George Washington Carver finding over 300 uses for peanuts (but not peanut butter)<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: [[Mailbag 53]]<br />
*Origin: ''American Dad!'': "[[Wikipedia:Black Mystery Month|Black Mystery Month]]" - The episode centered around an attempt to disprove [[Wikipedia:George Washington Carver|George Washington Carver]] as the inventor of peanut butter, and this quote ends the episode. It is likely from context this is his only experience with [[Niggos|Black]] History Month<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
;Dork of Ages<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: [[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]<br />
*Origin: ''American Dad!'': "[[Wikipedia:Dungeons and Wagons|Dungeons and Wagons]]" - A nickname that Hayley uses to refer to Steve, when playing "Dragon Scuffle".<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
==''[[Wikipedia:Rocko's Modern Life|Rocko's Modern Life]]''==<br />
;Bad luck and extreme misfortune<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: Describing the effects of the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]<br><br />
*Origin: "Fortune Cookie": Filburt's fortune cookie reads "Bad luck and extreme misfortune will infest your pathetic soul for all eternity"<br><br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
==Dragonball==<br />
;Kamehameha<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: [[Parody|The inspiration]] for Chris's finishing move, the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]<br><br />
*Origin: It's the most famous attack from DragonBall Z<br><br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
==''[[Excel Saga]]''==<br />
;I'm much saltier now<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: Chris likes to say this to say that he's less [[naive]] about sex than he was in high school thanks to porn.<br><br />
*Origin: Something Excel says to comment on her training. In particular, she's responding to someone describing her as "sweet", which is the only way the sentence sounds even remotely appropriate.<br><br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
==''[[South Park]]''==<br />
;Breakin' my balls<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: Said about something that gives him a lot of [[stress]].<br> (This is actually a common phrase, but knowing Chris and his track record of [[Things Chris has ripped off|plagiarism]], he more than likely stole it from ''South Park''.)<br />
*Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Kenny Dies|Kenny Dies]]": Cartman tries to start a business selling aborted fetuses to stem cell research laboratories. When making deals over the phone, he says "Ugh, you're breakin' my balls man. Got 'em in a vice grip, here."<br><br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
;Shove your ass down your throat and make you eat your underwear<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: Threatened [[Clyde Cash]] with this line in the video [[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]].<br><br />
*Origin: "[[Wikipedia:The Breast Cancer Show Ever|The Breast Cancer Show Ever]]": Wendy challenges Cartman to a fight after the latter makes an extremely tasteless breast cancer joke. Cartman, not wanting to fight, tries to talk her out of it, but refuses to apologize for the joke publicly, prompting Wendy to threaten him with this line.<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
==[[Transformers]]==<br />
;One shall stand, one shall fall.<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: Used in a speech he gave to Clyde Cash during the infamous [[IRC (20 January 2009)|20 January 2009 IRC chat]], where Chris revealed that he had several pairs of [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]].<br />
*Origin: [[Optimus Prime]] has said this phrase several times to Megatron in the television series, as well as the Transformers movie from 2007.<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
==''[[Star Trek]]''==<br />
<br />
;Captain's Log, Stardate.<br />
<blockquote><br />
*Source: The introduction to many of his videos.<br />
*Origin: The typical intro to an episode of the television series and any entry to the film series.<br />
<br />
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Kacey_Call_1&diff=124562Kacey Call 12010-11-11T22:55:07Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Transcript */</p>
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<div>{{quote|Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep [[Chris and sex|bangin']] your BREASTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN until you get the first DOSAGE of my [[comeuppance]]!... And then you know what, I'm going to lick it, I'm gonna [[Homos|lick it]] off your face, and then we're gonna share it in our tongue like tongue sharing MOMENT!|Chris, not being creepy or fucked-up whatsoever}}<br />
<br />
In [[August 2009]], Chris ([[Ian Brandon Anderson]]) called [[Kacey]], as he attempted to pretend to be the [[CChanSonichuCWC|REAL CWC]] to get with Kacey. Hilarity and [[fail]] ensued.<br />
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Most of the call, Chris forgets he's pretending to be Liquid, but Kacey manages to play along.<br />
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==Transcript==<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hello?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Hey honey! Oh my god, it's so good to hear your voice again; it's me, Kacey! How are you?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hey Kayce! I'm good. You sound like it's goin' good. ''[Kacey overlaps: Ah, I love when you call me that!]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, I'm so happy cuz I got to talk to you! I missed you all day today. It sucked being in school. I can't believe it's almost finals.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Aww, yeah, I know, summer finals, right?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I know, I don't know why I did summer session, it's just... I don't know. You know that I'm really, ''really'' into intelligent guys; which is why I love you. And I've, you know, gotta do the same. So how's school for you? ''[Chris overlaps: Aaahhh...]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh, things have been great for me, you know, I just finished the [[Sonichu 9|dating episode]]; it is ''fantastic''.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, well that's cool, but what does that have to do with school?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ...Uh, you know, the [[comic]]s, so I just... I felt like finishing it up, so I finished it...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[overlapping]'' Oh, I get what you're saying! Oh, that is so cool!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' The dating education episode. It's on the [[CWCipedia]].</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, that's awesome. I'm gonna have to check it out, because, you know, that is of course what led me to you in the first place. ''[Chris overlaps: Oh, yeah.]'' But, um, what about actual school? 'Cuz I know you had classes today too!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Ohhh, yeah... Oh, yeah, they were very tough on me, but, I felt like I take a break, finish up my comic work, and get that outta the way, y'know?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, I get what you're saying; you're gonna do everything tomorrow, well, that... that's so cool of you, I mean, at least you're being serious about it, but you're not being ''too'' serious. So, um, when are your finals? Are they next week, too?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Mmm, yeah, only got... I only got one to go, y'know? One more test to go, and then I'm done.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh god, you're so lucky, cuz my finals, like, they don't even start 'til next week, so... Which one's your last one again? I can't remember, I'm ''[laughs]'' sorry.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ...I'm sorry, what was that question? I didn't quite understand it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Sorry. ''[laughs]'' You know I talk fast 'cuz I'm so excited to be talking to you. Um, so-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' It's all right.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' So which one's your last final? I totally forgot.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Which one's my last, uh, fina- my last final?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, is it the same one, you know, that same class we have together?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Aaahhh... No, it's not, no, it's not that one... Uuhhh... I'm trying to think of the name. I'm trying to think of it... Um... Oh, yeah, it's the one where I'm doing, uh... It's the one where, uh... working with, uh, I think it's... I think I'm working in Photoshop, something like that, with the... ahh, so much going on in my head right now...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, oh, it's your... databasing and, uh, computer graphics class!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yes! My computer graphics class. Yes, that's it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, okay. God, and, I've seen some of your work since you sent it to me, and lemme just tell you, you are ''so'' frickin' amazing, like, I cannot ''wait'' to see you this weekend.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, yeah, you know my address, right? You got [[Wikipedia:MapQuest|MapQuest]] to come all the way over?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my God, I've got a GPS system, you know that, sweetie!</font><br />
<br>''[Chris and Kacey both stammer a bit]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[high-pitched]'' Oh, that's right, you told me about the GPS! I totally forgot!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I got it for my birthday this year, remember? So, um... yeah, I've already got it plugged in, and... it's gonna be so much fun, so... do you remember our last time together, you know, our, uh, our third date? ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Ah, date number three... mmm... oh, I've been so busy with, uh, with studying for the finals. It's just that so much of the details are plaguing my mind at the moment!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, I know. But it was so magical. I have never, ever been with someone so sensual, and just so in tune to me. I can NOT wait to see you again. So maybe you can give me a sneak preview of what you're going to do the next time I see you?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I'm gonna rock your world, baby.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[laughing]'' Oh, Chris, you are so hot. God, I don't know how you do it. So stop teasing me, you've gotta give me more.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' It- It just comes natural to me, I guess. I got a deep sensual voice, you know. I definitely got the [[Wikipedia:Bing Crosby|Bing Crosby]] tune, baby, you know I been raised on [[music]]! My dad was a technical engineer! Got all them patents and everything!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my God, Chris! I love it when you talk like that! God, so, you know when [[SingStar Challenge Round 2|you sang Fresh Prince]] today, you know I looove that. Oh my God, like you know that white boy rap? Oh my God. You were amazing, almost as amazing as last time I saw you.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Aw yeah, before that, yeah. Y'know I'm into hippin'- I'm hippin' to soo many hippin' tunes right now. But you know, I like to just... uh, sometimes I like to look back, at my favorite hits and just uh, listen to them you know? Ah, you know I definitely did like [[Sonic]] Boom and Don't Say You Love Me, too bad- ah, too bad I got beaten to the punch on those. Uh yeah...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' God, I know, I was so hoping you would do something like that. I mean, maybe you could do [[Wikipedia:N'Sync|N'Sync]] next? I love [[Wikipedia:Tearin' Up My Heart|"Tearin' Up My Heart"]]. Could you do that one for me?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I got bears - you know what? - I got bears - I got a better song I'm planning on next one. Uh, here's a little preview. Hang on.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Awesome. AWESOME. Thank you! ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hang on. Hang on. Hush-hush-hush!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Aww.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[shouts]'' YOU GOT THE TOUCH. YOU GOT THE POWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER, YEAH!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh Chris. Your voice... well, you know what it does to me. It gets me so hot.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Ohhhh yeah.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So tell me how much you like when I get hot.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oohhhh, I'm lovin' it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' What are you gonna do to me Chris? I mean, love songs are wonderful, I know you've got lots of ideas in your head.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' It'll be like the first time all over again, girl. You know I enjoyed the first time.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I know, just the way you looked at me-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[interrupting]'' I'd like ta, I'd like ta, I'm definitely gonna try to repeat the encore, repeat as best as I can, you know. You know, to the best of my memory, even though I been messin' up stuff for the finals and whatevurrr, so...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So did you remember what I wanted you to do next time?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Aww... shoot.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Chris, how could you forget!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh, you know... lemme take a guess, lemme take a guess! Uh, you want me to caress your breasts?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, that's one of them, but I wanted to do something a little more adventurous! I can't believe you forgot, you seemed so excited!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[in a high-pitched whine]'' OH YEAH I'M SO EXCITED! I just can't hide it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I guess I'll forgive you this time, but I totally, absolutely wanted you to tie me up and let me be at your mercy. I mean doesn't that sound awesome?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' AWW YEAH THAT DOES SOUND FUCKIN' AWESOME.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Ok well since I told you that you have to tell me what you're gonna do to me because come on, you know I love it when you talk dirty to me.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Aww, talk dirty to me! Duh-duh.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, please do.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Mmmmmmm... oh yeah.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Do it for me, your sweet little Kacey-kase.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah. I gonna... you just gonna love this. You uh, I'll be showin', I'll be presentin' myself to you, you'll be lovin' my dick, it's so big and all that you know, and you just, I'll be puttin' it, between your tits while you're all TIED UUUP!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my God that sounds so good! Like, I'm like crying because it sounds so wonderful! Keep telling me more!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I'm just going to get that girl...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I'm actually starting to touch my tits right now, so keep telling me more. Keep telling me more.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your BREASTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN until you get the first DOSAGE of my comeuppance!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my God, I can't wait to lick it off. I'm gonna be so, so hot. This is the Chris I know and love. Thank you!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And then you know what, I'm going to lick it, I'm gonna lick it off your face, and then we're gonna share it in our tongue like tongue-sharing MOMENT!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my God, you know I love shotgunning like that. God Chris, you're even a little spicier than last time. What's gotten into you?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[sings]'' VANILLA HOT HOT SPICY BABY.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So Chris... um, so what are you doing right now, y'know, are you uh, doing the same thing?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[overlapping]'' Oh, you know... yeah, I'm just I'm... yeah, I'm getting turned on. I'm just rubbing myself thinking about it!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my God, Chris! It's gonna be so much better when I'm really there, though. I can't wait to see you, I can't believe I'm actually going to go to your house, and be with you and it's gonna be awesome.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah. You know it, girl. You know it so well.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' And I mean, I just can't help getting hot thinking again about all your music videos, just... oh my gosh, I remember so much better than I poss-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[interrupting to mangle REO Speedwagon while Kacey giggles]'' You can't fight that feeling anymore... I've forgotten what I started fighting for... it's just so much listen to the shore... and I can't fight this feeling anymore.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, well, you know I hate to spoil the mood, but I mean you're just so much better than that brown-shirted... or that shirted impostor. I mean, I love your brown shirts way more.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Mmm...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Sorry, I'm getting so confused right now, because I'm just so hot right now. I'm so glad you-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[interrupting]'' Yeah, but you know I actually do have a red, white and blue-striped shirt ''in'' my closet.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You do? Why don't you wear it then? I mean, I guess that would make you too much like the impostor.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I don't know, because you know... just been trying to separate myself from the impostor I guess, I mean red, white and blue, you know, was my original roots, I mean look at back in the early pages of my books! Red, white and blue all the way, girl!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[sighs]'' Well...</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[plows on]'' I just had to separate myself from the impostor somehow. And you know how I rapped the [[PaRappa contest]]? I wore an orange shirt then, girl.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, I guess... okay, well I mean, just that impostor, I know he's really, really, really getting to you.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah, he's been getting to me. Giving me... wracking at my NERVES! ''[tard rage]'' Just really turning me... urgh! Making me so angry!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' God I know, he pisses me off too. I can't believe he's trying to be you when you're just so much sexier, hotter... ''[Chris overlapping: Yeah, yeah]'' I mean, his voice doesn't even sound like yours!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah... I mean, can you believe him? I mean he just looks so... aw shoot, what's the word I'm trying think of... oh yeah, he looks so soph-moric!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, he does, I, I guess, I mean...</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I mean the impostor looks like he's got to be about 13 or 15, does not have the diploma or the degrees, OR the certificate I had from the waterboy on the varsity basketball team during my freshman year!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Right, um... what are you talking about?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Aw, I'm just on a roll here, you know. I'm just trying- I'm just trying to- I've been- </font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[overlapping]'' I mean, 'cause-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' One five minute note or you know... ah, he's telling me history or like um... I got my truths, you know. He's just bringing me all the counter-evidence and I've got to fight back with the real deal.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh oh, you mean when he was trying to duel you in [[Spanish]] and he showed that fake certificate with a fake [[Sonichu]] picture. Oh oh, okay, I get it, 'cause you were confusing me for a minute there, at first I thought that you were suggesting that you were the fat impostor, and you know, I was getting worried for a minute there.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Mmm. Well, you... well, I don't know about this and that but I tell you what... you are definitely talking to the real deal, baby. You know I'm going to ROCK YOUR WORLD.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[sighs]'' Yeah, you totally, totally are. I mean, like you said, next time we're going to try the strap-ons, and I can't wait for that!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Mmm. Let's do it after this, after this, after this one time, the first time this weekend, y'know... yeah, tie me down...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[interrupting]'' Oh right, like start out slow like that and... oh yeah, I get it, y'know... do you dominant first, then me dominant... I gotcha! ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, I know you said you couldn't wait... but I could do it for you Chris, definitely do it for you.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah. ''[voice gets high pitched]'' OH YEAH!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You know baby, I might skip school tomorrow and head down tomorrow, how does that sound?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Mmm. Tomorrow... hmm.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, finals are until next week, I can skip this week if you want me to spend the whole week with you, get a little good-luck lovin', you know?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Mmm. Oh yeah, that sounds good, that sounds... yeah, that sounds very good. Mmm. So what time do you think you could be at my place?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, let's see, you're only an hour and a half away, so six p.m. maybe?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Mmm. six p.m... mmm. Yeah, that sounds do-able. Six p.m.!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' Do-able, just like me, right?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[sings]'' DO-ABLE BABY!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Can you cook me something for dinner, something delicious?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uuurgh</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' And maybe afterwards a [[guitar]] serenade? You know, cause your songs put me in the mood. That's all I want, I want a delicious dinner and a guitar serenade where you sing, you know that last song you sung me just like last time, can you please repeat it for me? Can you at least sing a little bit right now?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[sighs]'' Hmmm, hang on a minute let me a minute, let me reflect in my memory here. My well audiograped memory my father entrusted me with well by teaching me so much music.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Of course! ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah. ''[sings]'' YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL! IT'S TRUE!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]''No, no, not the one you sang for the impostor, the one you sang for me on our last date.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh, I'm sorry...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I know, it's easy to get confused.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[overlapping]''Yeah, I'm kind of a little bit confused myself, it's been a long day.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Aw, I know, I know. I mean, you're doing so well since, you know, considering what you're majoring in and everything.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ...Yeah! Computer graphics and design!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Did you change your major? What?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' No, that's BEEN my major.</font><br />
<br>''[long pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ...Okay.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[overlapping]'' That's my major, computer graphics and design.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh... that's, uh, weird. But anyway, what are you gonna cook for me? You know, for the date?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah. Hm, I could definitely whip up a, uh, pretty good stew for you.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oooh, a stew, what type of stew?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh you know, with the tomatoes and the vegetables and the whatnot.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You know, I thought you were a little more ambitious than that. I mean, stew sounds good still, but isn't that better maybe for a winter getaway?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hm.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' How about you make my favorite? I told you about my favorite the other day, can you make it?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[mumbling]'' Umm...your favorite..uhh...your favorite, your favorite. Uhh. Boy I wore myself out getting excited and I can't even remember too clearly.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' That was my fault, I'm so sorry! But you know, talking to you, just makes me want to, you know. ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' YEAH.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But it's just chicken risotto, so will you be able to do that for me?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Risotto's...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, maybe make a little video of you making it for me so that, uh, I can see how much love and awesomeness you're putting into it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uhh..I don't know if, I don't know if I mean, to make it, to have a video up in the amount of time before you get here, but I would definitely cook you a risotto.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, awesome. So anyway, I like what you said to that impostor about him not having a [[sweetheart]], because I mean, if he had a sweetheart he really would, you know, make her a judge, don't you think? Because if you didn't make me a judge I would have been so pissed off. So I mean, what do you think about that?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uhh... I'm sorry, you got me confused there, could you start from the beginning and go slow please?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah! Oh, sorry, sorry, I just got so excited talking to you. ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' It's okay.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So, um, you know how you told the impostor? The impostor doesn't have a heartsweet on his judge's panel. Do you think that's because he doesn't have one?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hmm... oh yeah, that's, that's very likely but you know, I did realize that I apparently did take observation and notice, that actually one of them is a uh, is a real-life close gal-pal by the name of, uh, I think Kim Wilson?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, he's-you think he has a girlfriend named Kim Wilson? How do you know that? You are so awesome!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, yeah, I know I'm awesome. ''[laughs]'' Yeah but yeah no, I've just been hearing news talk between, you know, here and there and the [[fanbase]], yadda yadda yadda. No, but they're just basically, they're just friends. Besides, I heard that Kim has been together with this tough dude named, uh, Logan, and they have two German shepherds.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, I love German shepherds, but, um-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[interrupts]'' ARF!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' But, um, would that mean that you still like her, though? I mean-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[overlapping]'' Oh no no no no..</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[overlapping]'' Er, HE likes her?</font><br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, uh no no no. No, they've always been friends. I mean, you know, he had to know why though because she was already taken, in order to establish like guys do, to actually be with her or not, you know.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, you know, the impostor's never gonna get anyone anyway, he's not as awesome as you. You know, I just fell for you right off the bat. I mean, he's just such a fatty and you're thin and you're hot, and your medallion is so much better.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ...Oh yes. Nothing like the real deal.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' And your flowing locks, I mean, come on. What's with that [[hair]]cut?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his mom probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh..I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' You're gonna get your mom to cut your hair? Oh Chris, oh you, I get it, you're joking. You're so funny.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh...I might be, but then again I might be serious, you never know.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well you are full of surprises.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[shouting]'' I AM FULL OF SURPRISES! ''[pause]'' I am full of surprises, woman, you know me. I am full of surprises.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I know you, I definitely, definitely know you. So tell me about some of these surprises. Spoil me, please.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[laughs]'' Ahh, okay. Hmm, surprises surprises..yes...well, you'll have to see my [[house]], it'll definitely look so much familiar to you...if you look anywhere on the internet you'll recognize my house.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my god, it's just gonna say you. It's just gonna say "[[Christian Weston Chandler]]", right?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, I'm sorry...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You know, figuratively?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, the house pretty much screams Christian Weston Chandler. You know my [[car]] has a license plate that says "SONICHU" on it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Does it? Wow, that's so funny because the impostor has one just like that! You would think they wouldn't let two tags be the same.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[high-pitched]'' Yeah, I know!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my god, that has got to be, like, the worst coincidence ever. I can't believe he did that to you.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I know! Yeah, you know, one thing I'm definitely going to share with you after you get here? My original hand-drawn pages. You're just gonna enjoy seeing them, the original hand-drawn, unaltered, from the computer, you will definitely see the hand-drawn resemblance.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well yeah I've seen them before. But I can't wait to see...I guess you know, new ones and stuff? So um, really quick, did you get my picture that I sent you?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah, I saw it. NICE.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Nice? Okay. What did you think about the color shirt I was wearing?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah... RED. The only thing that's missing is white and blue! Other than that, our shirts are patriotic. WE LOVE AMERICA! Proud to be an American. And I was born in Washington Jefferson Hospital, which is in [[Charlottesville]]...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So, does that picture make you horny? How horny does it make you?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah. Turns me on.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' How bad?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Real bad.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Real bad? Like last time?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Ohhh yes.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Like so many times in my past before, even before I met you, but there was nothing, you know, I watched my own share of pornography in my lifetime, but that's just me growing up, you know?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I was curious, I had to know!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' That's so cute! So what are you doing now?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I'm talking to you, and enjoying this nice conversation.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh Chris, you're so awesome! So um, you remember the last time we were talking and we were talking about, you know, socialism and health care? You know, you never finished your opinion on that. Could you go ahead and expand?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Um, socialism and health care. Umm...yeah, I definitely feel that, uh, health care would be good for, you know, the elderly and the disabled people and, uh, socialism, uh...I don't have all the details on socialism really. I might be leaving a few out in my head to make a final opinion.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, socialism just means, you know... [[Obama]]'s plan on healthcare. We were talking about this for hours!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah. Oh yeah, I'm just spacing out right now, haha. Ahh... but yeah, Obama's plan on health care. Well you know, I mean, he's, uh yeah, he's trying but yeah he's just not trying hard enough. Hang on, I gotta switch my arm, my right arm's getting tired out on me. You know how it is...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[overlapping]'' Oh, is it because you're uhh, you're uhh, you know...touching yourself?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, no, my right arm was holding the phone and I used my left hand to touch myself-</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[overlapping]'' ''[giggles]'' Ooh, that's a little spicy!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' It's like, you know, you're holding the phone over to your ear and your arm just hurts after a while you've held it there.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' ...Right...So, um...</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh actually you know, I just remembered, I wanted to recommend to you some more viewing notes from youtube, I want you to look at the videos on the account CCHAN6789.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' What was that? CCHAN6789?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, they were all from me. That's an old account, I pretty much just ended the deal with it, past time.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' W-what's it again?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh...It's C-C-H-A-N-6-7-8-9. Yeah, all me there. The real me.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh. What? Oh, I'll have to check it later when I'm near a computer. That's cool, that's cool.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. So you know uh, Kim, you know uh, how she, uh, yeah you know, uh, Kim, I actually heard that Kim and her friend Logan actually live in the Charlton area close to the downtown mall, you know? So if you ever wanted to look her up and, you know, just talk to her, you know, find about more about the impostor for me, or you know, see what her opinion of me is on the Internet from her point of view...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, you want me to do some undercover stuff? Chris, that is so sweet of you! You know how much I wanted to get involved.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah, sure. You know that ScarletSanctum account? That's hers.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, no, I will totally, totally message her. It's Kim Woods, you said?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' No, Kim Wilson. Totally. Message her, talk to her all about me.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I totally will. That is-yeah. I gotcha.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh actually, yeah. I'm looking through my uh, e-mails...oof. My arm's cracking up on me again, you know from holding the phone-</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[overlapping]'' You know, that's so weird, because you know, you work out all the time, Chris, so you would think a phone wouldn't be, you know, so heavy for you-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[overlapping]'' Yeah, uh yeah, it's like light, but it's like, holding my arm in the same position for an extended period of time, it just bothers me.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, okay. So, um, you told me that you had some new Sonichu merchandise coming out, so can you tell me about those? ''[giggles]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[sighs]'' Uhh...oh yeah. I definitely got Poké Balls-I definitely got a [[Sonichu Ball]] replica in the works.</font><br />
<br>''[long pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, that's awesome. How much are you gonna sell them for? Cause I know you made so much money...</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Eh, they'll probably go for like five, ten bucks. You know, I wanna get it out there.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, oh okay. You want it to start out like that. Okay, got it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Actually you know, I think I am, oh yeah. As I was trying to say earlier but then my arm cramped up on me, I was checking my e-mail and uh, actually I have Kim Wilson's e-mail address, I could share that to you, okay?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh please do, that would be awesome! I will put it in my address book right away.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' All right, I'll spell it out for you. It's S-C-A-R-L-E-T-M-A-R-I-E-S-A-N-C-T-U-A-R-Y at gmail dot com.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So it's scarletmariesanctuary@gmail.com?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, yeah, but yeah. Okay but anyway listen, don't uh, let her, don't uh spread this around to anybody, I'm trusting you. Keep it just between you and me. Just between you and me.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' No, no, definitely, I won't tell anyone. Just between you and me, Chris, just like, you know, our sexy secrets.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yes. Anyway, I gotta go, you know, I'm just tired out right now...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Aww, I don't want you to go, though.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh I know, I wanna talk to you some more too, but, like, ''[high-pitched]'' you know, I need my rest girl, I gotta see you tomorrow at six and make your, uh, your, uh... your... rigatoni?</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' Risotto, risotto, sweetie, risotto.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' RISOTTO!''[super high-pitched]'' RISOTTO, RISOTTO!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But still, can you make me a special video, please please? I'm not gonna be there till six so please make me a video!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[sigh]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' It doesn't have to be cooking, just make me a video about how much you love me, please. You know, I'm feeling so lonely because this impostor, he's taking up a lot of your time, so please?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' All right, sweetheart, I'll make you a video saying how much I love you...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[overlapping]'' Oh my god, thank you!</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ...but don't be surprised if it ends up on, uh, a different account, you know.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I know. Oh, you're gonna keep it between us! I got it, I got it. That's awesome. Just e-mail it to me and I will look at it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I will e-mail it to you and let you look at it. Yes, I'll e-mail you the link.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Awesome, please, PLEASE e-mail me the link.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' All RIGHT, we've got a game plan!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Awesome.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[Singing over her]'' YEAH, I CAN'T FIGHT THIS FEELING!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Be as sexy and awesome like you always are, okay, please?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yes, sexy and awesome. You got it, girl. You got it.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, then I guess I'll let you go to sleep and, umm...</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, you have pleasant dreams tonight, sweetheart.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I will as long as you're in them.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Bye. ''[Kissing noises]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I love you, Chris.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I love you too. Love talking to you.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I love talking to you too...I love doing more with you, but that will have to wait till tomorrow.</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[weirdly high-pitched]'' Yeah, wait till tomorrow when you get here!</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So...I'll be in your dreams, right?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, you'll be in my dreams and I'll be in yours, ''[sings]'' I'll be in yours...</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[Tries to interrupt]'' All right, th-</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I NEVER PROMISED YOU A HAPPY ENDING! I'm just trying to take a crack at his song now. The one that he could have stolen from me because, you know, I love [[Britney Spears]] as well.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, I haven't seen that one yet, is it up?</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yes, it's up. ''[sings over her again]''</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''[giggles]'' Okay, Chris, well...</font><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I'm tired, I'll talk to you later.</font><br />
<br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I'll call you tomorrow before I come, okay? All right, love you, bye!</font><br />
<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Chris Gear Solid: The Twin Ducks <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|B0Mg8anOthI}}<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/mrallex mrallex]<br />
| Stardate = 10 May 2010<br />
}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=Kacey Phone Calls|prevlink=First|nextlink=[[Father Call]]}}<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?mkgfzztdgcz mp3 of phonecall]<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Trolling]]<br />
[[Category:Phone calls]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mailbag_10&diff=122458Mailbag 102010-10-29T19:44:23Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>__NOTOC__<br />
'''Mailbag 10''' is yet another [[Mailbag]] uploaded to the [[CWCipedia]] on 5 [[December 2009]]. [[Chris]] answered them on 6 December 2009, and in doing so managed to mess up most of his reply templates, meaning that very few of his replies were actually readable on their original page.<br />
<br />
This Mailbag contained several letters regarding Chris's stance on [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|Asperger's]], which was recently revealed to be far more insane than suspected. Chris also receives several more [[troll|fan]] [[:Category:OCs|OCs]], a follow up letter about the [[Mailbag 9#Iranian democracy|Iranian elections]] and a somewhat blunt introduction to the masterpiece "Sonichu is Dead".<br />
<br />
This was also the batch of emails that finally pushed Chris over the edge, causing him to beg his sysop to [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#Mailbag Issue (CCS)|stop uploading stressful emails]].<br />
<br />
==Answered==<br />
===The incredible vanishing email===<br />
{{quoteboxred|From: David Crass <crasscrab@gmail.com><br />
<br />
Dear Chris Why is [[Rosechu]] so useless? It's like she's some sort of classical feminine trope. The only time she has ever actually done anything was when she sexually assaulted [[Jason Kendrick Howell]]. I don't know how you see it, but as far as I can tell, Rosechu is little more than a sex object. I mean, all she seems to do through most of the comic is hang on [[Sonichu]], take nude pictures of herself, and get kidnapped. Care to explain how exactly it is that you preach women's rights while at the same time falling back on classic female caricatures?<br />
<br />
Sincerly, David Crass<br />
PS: Your plots seem to be getting more and more convoluted and unnessarily complicated, with nothing ever tying together and a myriad of new characters being introduced and retconned, only to play no real role within the overall plot.}}<br />
This letter was originally posted to [[Mailbag 4]]. Chris moved this letter to the [[Rejected Mailbag]] on 26 [[November 2009]], then answered it 8 days later on 4 December, and finally moved it here on 6 December. It was revealed in the [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|Jack Thaddeus call]] that the letter was from [[Jack]], and that Chris only answered it after Jack called him out.''<br />
{{EmailReply|She is not useless, sure she has gotten captured, but she is quite excellent in the offense and defense too. Plus, look at [[Amy Rose]]; she is not useless, yet she gets captured sometimes too. She is not just a sex object; she is an individual with her own feelings, aspirations and opinions. More of her character will show in later pages.<br />
<br />
Maybe they are not the main character at the time, but they do serve their purpose overall.<br />
<br />
--[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 05:30, 5 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===Does Chris hate homos today?===<br />
{{Email|From: [[IRC (23 July 2009)|Bill Riley]] <bill.riley42@yahoo.com><br />
Dear Chris,<br />
<br />
I just have to say I LOVE your [[Sonichu comics]]! It has really captivated me and I feel I can't stop reading! I have to say one of my favorite characters in the comic is the creator himself, Chrissy! My favorite quality in him is that he is SO CUTE! I love his courage and will-power to overcome such intense experiences! Never give up you hunk!<br />
<br />
Stay sweet!<br />
Bill}}<br />
{{EmailReply|Firstly, thank you for your support, and secondly, I DO NOT CARE FOR YOUR HOMOSEXUAL FLIRTS; I AM STRAIGHT!!! SO GET OVER YOURSELF AND GO FIND A WOMAN TO FALL IN LOVE WITH!<br />
[[Stress Sigh|*sigh*]]<br />
I'm sorry for that outburst, but I have just read a not very pleasant message/image; it just was the wrong time for me. Anyway, I ONLY Love Women, so No homo flirt of any sort is allowed.<br />
<br />
--[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:03, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===Iranian democracy revisited===<br />
[[Image:Burqachu.jpg|thumb|The Middle East is a wonderful place to live. '''NOT!''']]<br />
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Mahmoud Ahmadinejad|Mahmoud Ahmadinejad]] <ajad368@yahoo.com><br />
<br />
Hello,<br />
<br />
Thank you for for kind reply, Mr. Chandler. I have tried being kind and courteous, but my people will not believe I won the election fair and square! Is there anything else you can suggest I do to make them calm down?<br />
<br />
And thank you for your kind consideration of including an Iranian character in a future comic! Sonichu is very popular in Iran, and your face is well known here. Adding an Iranian character will only make it more popular.<br />
<br />
Here I include my humble suggestion for a new Rosechu. She is adhering to the standards of Iranian beauty by wearing one of our traditional cloaks, which protects us from the harsh climate of our country. <br />
<br />
The cloaks hold special powers, and if she finds a sweetheart he can finally take the cloak off of her and reveal what she looks like.<br />
<br />
I'm sorry, but my drawing skills are not good! Not nearly as good as yours!<br />
Your friend,<br />
<br />
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad}}<br />
{{EmailReply|That is good, and your drawing is okay. I have saved it onto my Memory Stick, so it will be considered. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:03, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===The times they are a changin'===<br />
{{Email|From: bilboggins@email.com<br />
<br />
While some comics feature dates, other comics have no dates on them, so it's hard to tell how much time has passed between the stories in the CWCiverse. For instance, how much time passes between episode 19 and episode 20? A Sonichu timeline, featuring dates when things happen in the CWCiverse, would really help.}}<br />
{{EmailReply|That issue will be addressed greatly in future comic pages. Thank you for your input. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:03, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===God save the queen===<br />
{{Email|From: Steven Shaw <cpt.capslock@hotmail.co.uk><br />
<br />
awesome to finally get a chance to talk to the creator of the Sonichu comics. Hope you can answer a couple of questions for me.<br />
<br />
My questions are:<br />
1: I know sonichu evolves into Metonic/Ulrta Sonichu and Rosechu evolves into Vamprosa, but do any of the other Sonichus or Rosechus evolve? If so, what into?<br />
<br />
2:Where did Darkbind come from? he ssems like a really cool character but he only got a 1 page summary for his back story.<br />
<br />
3:What happened to the people/pokemon who brought up the chaotic combo? Did the whale come back and finish of Swampert? Don't leave us in suspence!!!<br />
<br />
4:What's the deal with the new site ads? I think someones trying to mess with you (I mean, "Duck Presevation Society" really?)<br />
<br />
oh well that's all i wanted to ask.<br />
<br />
Toodle-pip (Yes i'm British)<br />
SS}}<br />
{{EmailReply|Only the original Sonichu and Rosechu can evolve; the others have no current evolutions. Darkbind comes from the distant region of [[RuleCWC|Rulecwc]]. Those individuals current status will be addressed in future pages. Blame [[Jack Thaddeus|Jack Thaddius]], as stated in my current blog on this date; he is a Sonichu-Hater. To complain to him about that, as well as the God Damn homosexual ads, you can e-mail him at '''jackthethadius@yahoo.com'''. I really want to get rid of every last one of them too. Oh, and check out the message at the top of this mailbag from "Dave"; that is Jack too. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:03, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===Moar OCs===<br />
[[Image:Pepe.jpg|thumb|He gave it his best.]]<br />
{{Email|From: Randy McFalsa <misterdomino23@gmail.com><br />
<br />
First allow me to introduce myself. I am Sebastian Wulver and I am a humongous fan of your comics. I've been reading through the fan mail and seen all sorts of fan made sonichus, so I thought I'd make my own... it's not quite as good as yours but I gave it my best.<br />
<br />
He's called Pepe'. I hope you like him.<br />
<br />
Peace from a true and honest fan<br />
<br />
-Sebastian-}}<br />
{{EmailReply|Actually is a good drawing; I have the .jpg now saved on my Memory Stick Duo for future consideration. Thank you for your contribution. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:03, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===Parkour more for the high score===<br />
{{Email|From: Jamie Stevens <anger_cultist@yahoo.com><br />
<br />
Hello there Chris!! <br />
Parkour or Free-Styling as it's also known as; is an awesome sport to get into. Will you be making more parkour videos?? PLEASE DO!! you should have someone record you doing crazy flips and tricks like the pros do. Perhaps even a Sonichu doing parkour? <br />
<br />
--Jamie}}<br />
{{EmailReply|I will consider that. Thank you for your input. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:03, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===In which Chris demands money to visit Austria===<br />
{{Email|From: ernestmecklinger@artlover.com<br />
Hello Christian Weston Chandler, greetings from Austria.<br />
<br />
I am an admiral in the Österreichisches Bundesheer, and I've introduced your Sonichu comics to some of my fellow officers and it's a big hit. I have taken it upon myself to translate your comics into German for the benefit of the troops in my battalion who do not speak English and they are begging for more. Now that Sonichu 9 is nearly done, I'm afraid the wait for the 10th comic will leave my soldiers in suspense and since we don't have much else to do these days this may affect morale. It would be really great if you could do you best to keep up this lightning-fast pace at which you have been uploading new pages permanently so we can all enjoy your work without having to wait too long.<br />
<br />
I would also be honoured to have you as a guest in my country, I'm even talking with High Admiral Lohengramm about possibly presenting your with an honourary Orden vom Goldenen Vlies. I believe it would look quite nice along with your Sonichu medallion.<br />
<br />
Thanks for your wonderful stories, they bring much joy to the lives of my men and myself.<br />
<br />
- Ernest Mecklinger}}<br />
{{EmailReply|Thank you for your support and honor. As long as the Round-Trip Flights have been paid for by your people, my family and I would be happy to visit your country, and for me to accept the honor.<br />
<br />
Also, you won't have to wait long for the 10th book to start after I upload #9's 100th Page, although there are quite a number to draw that go before the Previewed 8 Pages, and they are definitely included as part of that book.<br />
<br />
--[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:03, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
==Rejected Mailbag==<br />
===Meet Asperchu===<br />
[[Image:Asperchu-and-sonichu-meet.jpg|thumb|All around awesome guy Asperchu pretends to be happy upon seeing his retarded brother, Sonichu.]]<br />
{{Email|From: Alec-chan [[Asperchu]] <albasperchu@live.com><br />
Chris,<br />
<br />
This is Alec. Why have you not responded to the truly amazing comic I sent you?<br />
<br />
I am referring of course to my one TRUE and HONEST creation, the original ASPERCHU, the electric/aspergers type hedgehog pokemon, which I recently showed to you as a token of my esteem for you. I think you are perhaps scared and confused by my rise to greatness. If I knew you were to ever be worried by my meteoric rise to fame, I would NEVER have written to you with such uncareful regard for your feelings. I wanted you to know that you have inspired me to GREATNESS, NOT to take anything away.<br />
<br />
You have recently written your feelings on the ASPERGERS, which shows me that you are indeed worried that one such as I wants to take away your fame and glory, and I assure you this is simply the furthest from the TRUTH. Allow me to enlighten you on the real nature of the aspergers, which as you say is not like the [[autism]]. For one, we aspergers folks have the troubles with communicating to other people, we are very shy and have trouble making others to understand us. We also, secondly, have trouble with focusing too much on one thing at a time. I think that is where the confusion lies, for people see your utter DEVOTION to only Sonichu and your Playstation 3 and NOTHING ELSE as perhaps connected to aspergers; they do not realize that the fact you do not have time for the lesser things like work and friends as a sign of a TRUE and HONEST artist.<br />
<br />
On a second note, I think you were scared of my speaking to you because I compared myself to you. You see, I did not mean to compare my ASPERGERS to your AUTISM, for as you say the two are totally and completely different and are never and have never been the SAME. The only way I wanted to compare myself to you is that as you are an artist, I aspire to be an amazing artist as well. I hope you will accept my peace offering of ASPERCHU and SONICHU meeting as friends that I have attached.<br />
<br />
Your friend and protege,<br />
<br />
Alec Benson Leary}}<br />
{{EmailReply|Firstly, YOU WISH YOU WERE ME, and second, I apologize for putting your letter into the Reject page, but I felt it necessary, because 1), you are obviously a Troll from what you've typed. And 2), your drawing infers homosexuality, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT GOD DAMN LIFESTYLE OR WHATEVER WORD IS USED TO DESCRIBE IT!!! --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:00, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
==Autism Mailbag==<br />
===Chris worked hard===<br />
{{Email|From: Greg Renner <gregrenner@pacificwest.com><br />
<br />
Chris.<br />
<br />
For years, us autistics have struggled being relegated to the lesser role compared to those higher functioning than us.<br />
<br />
You say you fight for our people. But let me ask you, if you found a cure for autism, would you use it to eliminate us all?<br />
<br />
Or, how about if you found a cure for neurotypicalism? Would you use it to liberate us from being of the lower social caste?<br />
<br />
I would pray that you made the right choice, and even the playing field for humanity. Imagine, there would be no more indifferences. Everyone would be equal.<br />
<br />
There would be no trolls or people to bully you for what you are, because they also would be the same! Nobody to make fun of you for being autistic, because they too would be autistic.<br />
<br />
So, what do you say? I pray that after all you have done to bring glory to us Autistics, that you would not in the end betray us all.<br />
<br />
Sincerely,<br><br />
Greg Renner}}<br />
{{EmailReply|I would not betray any of my Autistic Folk, but I worked hard to be accepted like a normal person; don't you want to be accepted like that as well? --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:00, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===Chris thanks someone for their support, then ignores them===<br />
{{Email|From: Maryanne Penny <aspergersawareness@hotmail.com><br />
Hello, Christian Weston Chandler!<br />
<br />
I am with the Autism Society of America. Me and my associates of the Aspergers Syndrome division of the foundation have noticed your rise rise in fame over the last few years and would like to congratulate you on a job well done! We are very impressed with your ability to overcome the limitations your Aspergers Syndrome gives you. Not many children with Aspergers Syndrome or it's variations (autism especially) can overcome those hurdles, and they fall short in life.<br />
<br />
You, however, are an inspiration to them. A brave little boy I know with Aspergers Syndrome came up to me and showed me a drawing he had made. He took Mario and drew him as a wizard from the popular Harry Potter franchise. He then told me that his [[Sonichu|"Marry Potter"]], as he liked to call it, also had Aspergers Syndrome. It was a little weird, so I asked him why he would burden such a wonderful character with such a terrible disease like Aspergers Syndrome. He told me, and I'll never forget this, "Marry Potter does a lot of great things and he's super amazing! His Aspergers Syndrome doesn't hurt him like it hurts me, and I think that's really awesome. I hope to be like him someday, but I know getting rid of this Aspergers Syndrome is impossible." Normally, I would have nothing to say to that, but thanks to you, I can give these Aspergers Syndrome inflicted children the hope they need. They now know that overcoming Aspergers Syndrome is not just something only superheroes like Marry Potter can do.<br />
<br />
So once again I thank you, Christian. You're a Super Aspergers Syndrome Hero, and I would feel honored if you put up a page on your website supporting Aspergers Syndrome and its less prevalent variations(like autism).<br />
<br />
Sincerely,<br />
<br />
Maryanne Penny}}<br />
{{EmailReply|Thank you for your support; I will take it under consideration. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:00, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===Chris does not care for your derogatory remarks...===<br />
{{Email|From: Cad Earnest <goldorthegold@yahoo.co.uk><br />
<br />
I don't really see your point in your argument in the aspergers page on cwcipedia. It kind of seems that you're JEALOUS of people with the syndrome and that you hate them for accomplishing more than you despite having similar conditions.<br />
<br />
I mean if they shun you by having better communication skills. Doesn't that mean everyone with out a mental disorder shuns you by being better than you? I think you need to accept when you're incorrect about something.<br />
<br />
I'd also like to deconstruct your point:<br />
<br />
"I have not only Helped cultivate the First Generation ofAutistic People, but I have gone beyond the Autistic Dreamsacademically, communicatively and socially. Still, I have troublemaintaining Eye-Contact, my mentality is sometimes slow yet quick atother times. The people who first evaluated me ever even stated that Iwould never even make it to High School, much less even Write His Name. Take That and Smoke It, oldest doctors.I have worked very hard to achieve and maintain Honor Roll throughoutMiddle and High School, and even to make the PVCC Dean's List, andfulfill my parents' wishes to work for and earn the Degree andCertificate for Computer Aided Drafting and Design."-Christian Weston Chandler<br />
<br />
This is while claiming to have high functioning autism. It's not like you're low on the spectrum and getting these achievements. High functioning has to be the closest to aspergers so whoever first diagnosed you had mis-information... unless you were diagnosed as low functioning autism(with an IQ of lower than 80) there's no way you couldn't have made it through highschool taking remedial courses.<br />
<br />
I've also noticed however haven't you admitted several times that you are "Sometimes retarded"?, I also think there are better autistic role models out there than you. I apologise if there is any offence but you currently don't even have a job and it REALLY doesn't seem like you're that serious about marketing Sonichu. You may have passed high school and got a 2-year CADD certificate in 6 YEARS. But you've done nothing with it. <br />
<br />
Most notably in your comics you never use a ruler, your maps aren't even to scale could you tell me what they actually taught you in CADD classes? Also Doesn't CADD Chef relate to your CADD teacher who gave you F's, how did you make the Deans list when you got F grades? You have to be either lying or everyone must have been put on the list for simply passing.<br />
<br />
Your argument is flawed, beforehand you were saying autism is superior. Now you're saying people with aspergers are faking it too simply look better than you. You haven't really showed the world how successful Austic people can be because you just play videogames and waste your life away.}}<br />
{{EmailReply|Your comments have been read, I do not care for your derogatory remarks, and have a good day. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:00, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
===...But he's cool with copy-pasting replies=== <br />
{{Email|From: D Follett <dfollett09@gmail.com><br />
<br />
Autism vs. aspergers is NOT a competition. You don't need to prove that you're more pathetic than anyone else - the fact that you crap your pants like a 2 year old proves it enough.<br />
<br />
As someone with aspergers, I am insulted by your ignorance and outright hatred towards someone with a very similar problem to your own. I don't care what YOU have, or what you think you are - you insulting anyone else, ever, in the entire universe, is hilarious.<br />
<br />
You have conquered nothing. You have deluded yourself into thinking you're better than your autism, but you have accomplished nothing in your life but making yourself look more and more foolish every day.<br />
<br />
I'd put some serious work into myself if I were you. Your parents will not live forever, and when they are gone, there is no way you could afford to keep that house. You will be moved into a home with the 'slow minded' and the developmentally disabled, as you have completely failed to prove that you are a mature human being who is capable of managing anything more complex that a little LEGO universe.<br />
<br />
I felt sorry for you for a long time - for the trolls who make up fake girls that you fall in love with, to the trolls who have you honestly believing that people like your shitty artwork. You are racist, homophobic, and ignorant. <br />
<br />
Shut the fuck up and leave those with aspergers out of it, you asshole.<br />
<br />
D Follett}}<br />
{{EmailReply|Your comments have been read, I do not care for your derogatory remarks, and have a good day. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:00, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
==Parodies==<br />
===In which Chris is introduced to the definitive Sonichu experience===<br />
''Chris moved this letter from Mailbag 10 to the parodies page in the early morning of 15 [[December 2009]].''<br />
[[Image:Sonichu'sFinalMoments.JPG|thumb|Sonichu's epic death.]]<br />
[[Image:SonichuWhoring.JPG|thumb|Sonichu: the ultimate manwhore.]]<br />
{{Email|From: Sean Watley <seanawatley@gmail.com><br />
<br />
Hi Chris,<br />
<br />
Glad to see you're working on the comics again, although I think Episode 20 is dragging on too long. The Dating Education one and Issue #8 said "Christian Weston Chandler" more than this really recent stuff. I'd also like to see more comics about the things you accomplish each day, and maybe see your family in the comics. I'm sure you lead an interesting life.<br />
<br />
Anyway I read your recent blog entry about how you don't care what other people do with Sonichu, <s>so here's my stupid bullshit</s>. I'm not great with digital coloring yet but I figure I'll get better with practice:<br />
<br />
<s>Sonichu is Dead: http://sonichu.thecomicseries.com/<br />
</s><br />
<br />
<s>Sonichu is Gay: http://sonichuisgay.thecomicseries.com/<br />
</s><br />
<br />
Stay straight,<br />
<br />
Sean August Watley<br />
<br />
(P.S. <s>I'm still working on Sonichu is Gay</s>. If you have any ideas I'd love to hear them!)}}<br />
''The strikethroughs were added by Chris, who presumably went mad with rage. When he moved the letter on 15 December, he removed the first and last strikethroughs, leaving only the ones for the Sonichu is dead and Sonichu is gay links. Nobody knows why.''<br />
{{EmailReply|STOP IT! Sonichu is Straight, so STOP THE PRESSES RIGHT THERE AND GO NO FURTHER!<br />
<br />
Those side-stories of my life may be drawn in other pages, but not at the moment. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 04:03, 7 December 2009 (CET)}}<br />
<br />
{{Mailbag}}<br />
{{Not_Jerks}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121749DayOut2010-10-26T00:08:19Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Transcription */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am not that big, though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, old mall Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=117807User:Thedarkcloud42010-10-05T10:16:45Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Well, hello! What a surprise that you're here. Welcome to my bathroom. */</p>
<hr />
<div>== Well, hello! What a surprise that you're here. Welcome to my bathroom. ==<br />
I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
I'm about ready for you to leave now. You smell like liver spots.<br />
<br />
== I like user boxes. They're absolutely delicious. ==<br />
<br />
[[File:Coduser.png]]<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=114957User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-21T21:06:11Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>== Well, hello! What a surprise that you're here. Welcome to my bathroom. ==<br />
I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
I run around in theatres and sing songs about [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqDv4FHBw3A prostitutes dying of tuberculosis]. No, seriously.<br />
<br />
== I like user boxes. They're absolutely delicious. ==<br />
<br />
[[File:Coduser.png]]<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Gitar_of_Fail&diff=114363Gitar of Fail2010-09-17T17:08:19Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Guitar Hero III version */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Gitar.jpg|right|thumb|200px|The gitar in the image that won him $400 from [[GameStop Guitar Hero Contest|GameStop]] (''Guitar Hero III'' version)]]<br />
[[Image:CWCAdultChronicles.jpg|left|thumb|150px|The Gitar of Fail is seen on Chris's back here.]]<br />
<br />
The '''Gitar of Fail''' is the custom painted ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' controller Chris used in the [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes]]. He's showed it off in a number of his videos, and it's on the cover of his mocked-up copy of [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles]]. He appears to think that it counts as an actual instrument and gives him the skill to really play guitar.<br />
<br />
Chris apparently owns at least two ''Guitar Hero'' controllers, because the shape of the body in the contest photo is different from the one in his [[DVD]] slideshow. (One of them is the Gibson SG-styled model sold with the first two ''Guitar Hero'' games, while the other is the Les Paul sold with ''Guitar Hero III''.) He may have even owned a third controller at one point, another ''Guitar Hero III'' Les Paul, which he sold on [[eBay]] in September 2009. It's not clear why Chris would buy more than one controller, because he obviously has no friends to play with, but then common sense has never had much to do with his video game purchasing decisions.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align:center;">'''Fun Fact: He fails at using the guitar strap.'''</div><br />
<br />
==Appearances==<br />
The Gitar appeared in the [[PS3 History Level]] video.<br />
<br />
In Chris's [[CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero|music video]] for [[Ivy]], he uses the Gitar extensively to rock out for her. In this video, it appears that Chris has further decorated the Gitar since he [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008|first introduced it]] in October 2008.<br />
<br />
A lesser Gitar of Fail, a customized ''Rock Band'' Stratocaster known as "[[Things Chris has ripped off|Meatwad's Shredwud]]," appeared in a video Chris recorded in [[Old Time Rock and Roll on Shredwud|October 2009]]. Chris hocked this guitar on eBay around the same time, effectively [[Jimmy Hill|selling a product]] identical to another cartoonist's intellectual property.<br />
<br />
==Guitar Hero III version==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:CWCGitarPlaying.jpg|Chris seems a bit bored here, doesn't he?<br />
Image:CWCGitarPlaying2.jpg|The funny thing is, there are no guitar solos in the song "Holding Out For a Hero"... at all.<br />
Image:CWCShred.jpg|Not even guitar parts, I'm afraid.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
== Guitar Hero II version ==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:515-CustomGuitar2.JPG|Closeup of the body. Note how the paint looks like poster paint, since Chris's greasy hands would wipe off watercolor.<br />
Image:516-CustomGuitar3.JPG|Neck of guitar controller. Notice Chris's pic of himself playing guitar is on his guitar on the body AND the fret board. Also, transformation sequence of [[Chris-chan Sonichu]].<br />
Image:517-CustomGuitar4.JPG|Head. Notice the Sonichu sticker.<br />
Image:514-CustomGuitar1.JPG|Chris showing it off (to himself, at least).<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[GameStop Guitar Hero Contest]]<br />
<br />
{{Relics of Fail}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]<br />
[[Category:Video Games]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Song_for_Jackie.MOV&diff=114152Song for Jackie.MOV2010-09-16T21:49:56Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Song for Jackie.MOV ''' is a very strange video uploaded 16 September 2010. In another failureific attempt to impress [[Jackie]], Chris dons [[Niggos|Blackface]] and a [[Chris and Race|towel on his head]] while [[Chris and Music|"singing"]] to [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mmm_Mmm_Mmm_Mmm| "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm"] by [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crash_Test_Dummies| Crash Test Dummies]. Note that "singing" is in quotes because Chris's grating mumblings make even Chris's [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|ill-fated music career]] sound like a classically-trained soprano by comparison. He rounds out the performance with an impromptu [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minstrel_show minstrel song], his [[muscle bra|masculine bosoms]] flailing wildly with each gyration. At this point, Jackie's reaction is unknown... <br />
==Video==<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Song For Jackie<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TzAJvMKQeJA}}<br />
| stardate = 16 [[September 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Music|[[Chris and Music|Music]]}}, {{Sex|[[Chris and Sex|Sex]]}}, {{Racism|[[Niggos]]}}<br />
| style = {{Crazy|Crazy}}<br />
| shirt = {{DenimJacket|text}}<br />
| previous = [[XBox is OK.MOV]]<br />
| next = Current<br />
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
[[File:Leadbelly.jpg|thumb|Leadbelly's reaction to this video.]]<br />
<br />
'Ello. I am glasses wearing genie, [[Dragon Ball Z|Mr. Popo]]. [nods and folds his arms, then turns on audio.] I tell you a story. It is a good story. You will enjoy story. <br />
<br />
[''starts 'singing' ''] Once there was this boy [''flashes manboobs''] who was born with some autism and yet made a few friends, but after his high school years he...lost...his friends and was troll tortured. By bullies who were jealous of his material things [wiggles his head from side to side and waggles his finger] Nonononononono. [''hums'']<br />
<br />
Once there was this girl who continued to have friends long after high school. She could have had her pick of men. Then she found the wayward lost boy. They matched up very well, heavenly matched...<br />
Loooove, he was so[?]... <br />
<br />
And both [''starts to say 'boy', turns it into 'girl'''] boirl and boy were glad when they both saw each other's eyes. When they met up! They both thought of each other. Very often! They had enjoyed each other's company sweetly. Oh, roller coaster ecstasy. In fantasy, their days were simple and they looked to be married and have their own [[Reginald Chandler|boy]]. And [[Crystal|girl]]. It's true! Wait for marriage invitations! <br />
<br />
[''Suddenly animated, imitating fiddle player''] And there ain't no saints on de fiddle, no saints on de fiddle like this! Ain't no saints on de fiddle, no saints on de fiddle like this! <br />
<br />
[''begins to dance what is most likely a continuation of whatever Minstrel Song he saw; a mockery of African aborigional dancing'']<br />
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!<br />
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!<br />
<br />
And there ain't no saints on de fiddle, no saints on de fiddle like this! Ain't no saints on de fiddle, no saints on de fiddle like this! <br />
<br />
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!<br />
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!<br />
<br />
[''spoken''] Happy loving! Between me and Jackie! I love you sweetheart. Boing!<br />
<br />
==See Also==<br />
* [[For My Sweetest Ivy]]<br />
* [[A CWC Audition]]<br />
* [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_chan_(CWCipedia)&diff=113809Chris chan (CWCipedia)2010-09-14T22:56:42Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Cwcville */</p>
<hr />
<div>''This article is about the annotated [[ED]] page made by Chris and posted on [[CWCipedia]]. For details on Chris-chan himself, please see [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. For details on the ED forum about Chris, please see [[Chris-chan (forum)]].''<br />
<br />
The '''Chris chan''' article on the [[CWCipedia]] is an entry on Chris's wiki done to edit and modify most of Chris's article on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. This entry shows Chris's [[ego]] in action, trying to edit everything to make him look good despite most of the truthfulness the article holds on him. This is current as of 17 December, 2009 and will be updated as soon as Chris adds more of his additions.<br />
<br />
Chris did not simply copy and paste the text from the ED article; he retyped it completely, as he admitted at the beginning of his version. As a result, there are several typos in his version that were not in the version of the ED article that he copied. In addition, Chris omitted several paragraphs entirely from his version of the article, including one about the [[Medallion of Fail]] and another that concerned scurrilous topics such as the [[nudes]] and [[sex tape]] (although he later acknowledged the Kimmi video in one of his comments).<br />
<br />
It also confirms that Chris cannot understand subtlety. Parts of the page which are obviously untrue (such as him being a communist) are treated as fact, while the 4Chan meme jokes fly right over his head. Further, while some aspects of the page could be considered personal opinion (and in some rare cases Chris actually does correct parts of the article for truth, such as how many [[attraction locations]] he was kicked out from), most of Chris's "corrections" are blatant lies.<br />
<br />
Immediately after typing this, Chris demanded that the CWCipedia [[ChrisChanSonichu_and_WikiSysop_correspondence#The_revised_ED_Page|Sysop]] copy over all the hyperlinks from the original ED article so Chris can add those to his own wiki.<br />
<br />
<br />
== Note that... ==<br />
<br />
* Chris bolds the statement saying that he's [[homo]]phobic. He then clarifies that he doesn't hate the [[Homos|gay people]], he merely hates their lifestyle choice and sexuality – that is, the things that comprise some of the base elements of their personality.<br />
* Another doubtless fact: according to Chris's bolding, Chris also denies that Leviticus forbade [[That Goatee WILL Grow Back|shaving]], wearing [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|underwear with elastic straps]], or [[Sonic|crossbreeding]] [[Pikachu|animals]].<br />
* As for religious tolerance, Chris bolds the statement that he is a [[Chris and religion|"prolific hater of all things not Christian"]]. Yes, he himself confirmed that as a fact.<br />
* He bolds the statement accusing him of creating several sockpuppet accounts on ED to [[Fail|vandalize his ED page]]. He also reveals one of the main mysteries in his biography: he says that the reason behind his ED edits, which were the main cause of his subsequent downfall, was a [[Honor Roll|bizarrely ignorant]] belief that an "Information Overload" (= "adding a lot of [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|shitty pron pics]] and other self-compromising info") would somehow take his ED page down.<br />
* He unfoundedly denies that he [[Fail|failed]] in his war against [[ED]] and other [[Troll]] sites, and then bolds that his plea to his [[Trolls|"fans"]] to not donate to ED failed. <br />
*He refuses to admit that his nonexistent [[True and Loyal Fanbase|Sonichu fans]] are [[Trolls|nonexistent]], and that his "fans" didn't bring ED down (completely ignoring the subsequent explanation that it was caused by an issue related to the website as a whole)... and then bolds a completely unexpected revelation: that [[True and Loyal Fanbase|the only people who pay attention to Chris]] are ED donors.<br />
* To top all of this, Chris sadly bolds that his reactions to [[Trolls|trolling]] always make things worse.<br />
* Chris surprisingly bolds a statement saying that Mary Lee Walsh was reasonable to assume that Chris was publicly soliciting for [[Hanky-panky|sex]]. Getting back to Earth, he then quickly tries to correct himself, adding that he was not soliciting "anything Other Than Honest [[Gal-pal|Friendship]], that would etc. etc"... thus [[Fail|actually admitting to being a solicitor]].<br />
* Chris has generously "forgiven" [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for her past "misdeeds". He also tells us that she tried to ask Chris unofficially not to loiter on [[Attraction Location|college grounds]], but the Chandlers chose to not accept her letter. <br />
*Chris bolds that he still blames [[ED]] for breaking him up with [[Megan]], despite knowing full well that [[ShecameforCWC.jpg|the image that ended their friendship]] was dreamed up, drawn, colored, scanned and uploaded to ED by himself. He also (finally!) admits, by bolding it, that Megan was never his [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]].<br />
* Chris denies that he changes his [[Sweethearts]] frequently. He also bolds that [[Blanca]] was [[Troll|real]], and adds that he [[Naive|trusted her]], and that he [[Lie|"dumped her sorry ass"]] after "she" destroyed his [[Medallion of Fail]].<br />
* He also expresses his belief that there is [[Fail|absolutely no difference]] between making a conversation with a [[BlueSpike|9-year-old girl]] and a [[Julie|grown-up woman]].<br />
* He bolds that he wouldn't date an autistic, high-functioning or otherwise. The explanation is that he doesn't want to date [[Autism|''high-functioning'' autistic]] women because he "may be seeing a mirror" reflecting what he would become if he were a [[Slow-in-the-minds|''low-functioning'' autistic]]. To recap: he thinks that a ''high-functioning'' autistic woman acts like Chris would if he were ''low-functional''. Is he being [[Chris and his Ego|egotistical]] or just [[Women's Rights|sexist]]?<br />
* He admits that his parents finally advised him [[Honest Content|not to tell every woman he meets]] that he's a [[Virgin with Rage]]. FINALLY.<br />
* At first Chris vehemently denies that he owns [[Kimmi|blow-up sex dolls]]. Then he bolds the statements about him owning a sex doll, taking part in all those [[For Julie's Eyes Only|"JULAAAY!"]] shenanigans, and buying [[sex toys]] and porn vids since [[2003]]. Then in yet another comment he confirms that he purchased straight porn and sex dolls.<br />
* Chris reveals that his vast knowledge about sex and relationships stems from MORE than just watching [[Rule 34|porn]]! His other sources include: [[Date Ed|Sex Ed]], [[I Love Lucy|chick flicks]], [[gal-pals]]' advice, and something called "Relationship Management courses".<br />
* Then announces that knows about [[Chris and sex|sex]] and [[Love Quest|relationships]] "a LOT" more than any "God-D***ed [[Troll]]" will ever know... including, you know, trolls who are actually [[JERKS|in relationships]] and are not [[Virgin with Rage|Virgins with Rage]]...<br />
* The [[Geinus|guru]] continues to open our eyes, saying that everything we knew about relationships & sex is wrong! "Because while they ONLY think they know or even understand, they Really Do Not Understand At All; THEY ARE DUMBA**ES!"<br />
* Chris [[Naive|bolds]] all excessive positive epithets used in the [[ED]] article as [[Parody|irony]]. He then denies that he has any [[Chris and his Ego|unwarranted self-importance]]. However, a few paragraphs later, he expresses his honest belief that [[Chris and his Ego|actual real-world people would build a city in Virginia named "CWCville" and a "CWCville Mall" in this city, and dedicate them to Chris]].<br />
* Chris also bolds a confession that he "[[Life Upgrade|upgrades]]" his self-confidence by using vitamins.<br />
* He also bolds that [[Minor CWC-isms#Cosmos|HE CAN FEEL THE COSMOS]]!<br />
* Chris also denies several times... that [[CWCville]] is imaginary and fictional. [[Chris and reality|OH. MY. GOD.]]<br />
<br />
=The Actual Article=<br />
<br />
'''From Christian Weston Chandler,'''<br />
<br />
**Finally, the [[Lies|Truth]], False and the Exaggerated are Personally Sorted out from that which has plagued me since November, 2007. I will be retyping the paragraphs of the page verbatim, but with the following additions,<br />
<br />
**'''Bold Statements [[Honest Content|are TRUE without question]].'''<br />
**<strike>Striked Statements</strike> [[List of Chris's lies|are FALSE without question]].<br />
**Statements that are Neither '''Bold''' or <strike>Striked</strike> will be personally explained in ''(Parenthesis with Italtics)'', or otherwise are personal commentary in few other portions.<br />
**Portions of the Titles of the segments will be <strike>striked</strike> appropriately for content and exaggerations.<br />
**And all curse and dirty words [[CWC-isms|will be appropriately censored]].<br />
**'''[[April 16 Fetish Vids|Reader Supervision]]/[[For Julie's Eyes Only|Discretion is Advised.]]'''<br />
<br />
**Also, I purposely have not, and will not, include all images and their comments in this page for content purposes of [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|portryals of nudity]], wrongful-types of [[parody]], [[Slow-in-the-minds|retardness]] and stupidity, and such.<br />
<br />
**Should any new text come up on that ED page that are not in this page after full completion appear, or if you have any questions about it, please send those notes and questions to the [[Mailbag]], and I will address them appropriately then.<br />
<br />
**So, without further ado, here is Encyclopedia Dramatica's "Chris_chan" page, Personally Edited.<br />
--[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User:ChrisChanSonichu ChrisChanSonichu] 23:44, 17 December 2009 (CET)<br />
<br />
==Behold, <strike>the Mistake of God:</strike> Christian Weston Chandler. ''(The Only Mistake of God were THE PEOPLE who contributed to the Original E.D. Page)''==<br />
<br />
<br />
'''Born February 24, [[1982]], Christian is''' a <strike>[[naive]], [[Chris and sex|perverse]],</strike> [[Obesity|overweight]] ''(I am working on losing the belly)'' <strike>[[Niggos|racist]], [[Pedofork|pedophilic]],</strike> '''[[Homos#Fear_of_being_a_homo|homophobic]]''' <strike>un</strike>'''patriotic'''<strike>communist b******, self-proclaimed</strike> '''high-functioning autistic virgin [[Chris's room|man'''<strike>-child</strike>''']], and creator of his own skillfully-drawn series of [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]] starring [[Sonichu]] - his supremely insightful crossover of [[Pokemon|Pikachu]] and [[Sonic]]. As well as "suffering" from [[autism|atuisim]]''' ''([[Autism#Autism_cured.3F|which I still am for real]])'', <strike>Chris also suffers from a sever case of [[Chris and his Ego|unwarranted self-importance]], the only cure for which would be to remove his head from his consequently gaping a**. At the time of this writing, Chris has found neither the time nor the conviction to do so.</strike> ''(What the Hell is WRONG with these people?)''<br />
<br />
'''Other names for Chris-Chan include: CWC ''(Christian Weston Chandler)'', クリスちゃん, [[Ricardo Weston Chandler]]''', <strike>[[Ian Brandon Anderson]], [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|Ian Brandon Something]], The Impostor, [[Sammy]], Antonio, [[Metal Gear Solid|Solid Chris]] or any other lulzy names trolls can make up for him, which will make him throw a [[Chris and anger|tantrum]].</strike><br />
<br />
But it gets far worse, my friends... ''(For that ED Page, that is, LOL. Although, F.Y.I., '''"LULZ" is short for "[[Laughs Under Lucricities]]"''')''<br />
<br />
==Chris in Person ''(From THEIR Point of View)''==<br />
<br />
<br />
It is of utmost importance that, before one ever enters a fixed one-mile radius around Christian Weston Chandler's [[Ruckersville, VA]] habitat, one is well-acquainted with the facts regarding this man's ''(HERE COMES SOME REAL TORTURED VIEWS OF OPINIONS)'' <strike>bleak existence, and the mortal and immediate danger that one's proximity to him represents, bot to one's mental and physical well-being. In order to maintain his jaw-droppingly destrucive lifestyle, as we will explore,</strike> Chris has had to sacrifice any of the normal human customs practiced in modern society, and seems to have synthesized an entirely new list of traits which he believes better-equips him to indulge in his trademark fantastical escapism via invented comic book characters, <strike>[[Kimmi|blow-up]] [[Sex toys|sex dolls]], and [[Chris and his Ego|egomania]].</strike> ''(Such of my personal views do help make life more easier in my point of view, and the few considerably "Sacrificed Normal Human Customs", I.M.H.O, would be constant eye-contact with most people, self-confidence ('''Which is being UPGRADED with "[[IPods Down and Listen Up|Stock Market Rising]]" Vitamins of A and D''') in meeting people unassisted by others and internet, and being stuck on Routines of which new ones can be included with good, constant practice on my part.)'' To wit:<br />
<br />
**<strike>He rarely shuts up about [[Sonichu]],</strike> the self-endorsed, self-authored and mind-nubing allegory of Chris's life, as viewed through his own massive, [[1985]]-throwback rose-tinted glasses. ''(Sonichu's life is [[Sonichu#Sonichu_as_a_Mary_Sue|different from my own]], so I do not consider his life to be equivalent to mine, Also, Sonichu is NOT Autistic. And I DO talk about a lot of OTHER topics that come to mind; I do have a real life and I stay in tune to current topics now and then.)''<br />
**<strike>His skin and [[Hair|hair]] is covered in a semi-permeable and self-renewing film of grease; not incomparable to an arctic permafrost of dead skin cells and sweat, proving definitively that he never showers.</strike> ''(I Shower Daily and Thoroughly.)''<br />
**He wears recycled shirts from the Salvation Army ''(And Goodwill, but I also wear [[Chris and fashion|clothing]] that were purchased from fine stores such as Sears, JCPenny, American Eagle, Pacific Sunwear, etc)'' <strike>and believes it's a cause for gloating.</strike> He really believes in [[Semen#Recycling|recycling]]. ''(The ususal Paper, Metal and Plastic products that appropriately go to Recycling Sites in and around Charlottesville, VA)'' <strike>That is, he really really really believes in recycling. He recycles everything.</strike> ''(Obvious Exaggerations from their P.O.V.)''<br />
**His scent is <strike>a combination</strike> of [[Axe|AXE]] ''(and good clean practices of [[Chris and health#Hygiene|daily showers with soap, shampoo and water]], and sometimes the [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|natural body oders]])'' <strike>and A** (oversprayed, of course).<br />
**He leaves the toilet seat up.</strike> ''(I put the seat back down for consideration of the women.)''<br />
**'''[[CWC Update 9 April 2009|HE CAN FEEL THE COSMOS!]]''' ''(I did say that for [[Ivy]], and I will stand by the quote.)''<br />
**In the event that you are able to speak to Chris, you should be prepared to encouter ''(Pleasant, clean and intelligent conversations with no pressure for anything other than being friendly)'' <strike>wave after wafe of weak, juvenile aspersions cast in the hopes of making you forget just how abysmal Chris's life really is, along with creepy, probing questions about your personal life in regards to relationships with women.</strike> This is because '''Chris is still''' <strike>vainly</strike> '''searching for a [[sweetheart|girlfriend]], years after first causing a''' <strike>s***storm</strike> ''(minor mishap)'' '''by walking into a [[Fashion Square Mall|local mall]] while in [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Community College]], and advertising his desire for women via [[Attraction Sign|hand-held signage]].'''<br />
<br />
Lastly: ''(Thank God these S.O.B.s are almost finished with this list)''<br />
<br />
**<strike>Once he starts stalking a woman, he'll tenaciously track her down, even if she's really an IRL troll, a 4chan troll or just doesn't exist.</strike><br />
**'''He''' <strike>ALWAYS</strike> '''[[honest content|mentions]] he's a [[virgin with rage|virgin]]''' <strike>when he meets women. (I'm dead serious.)</strike> ''(Nowadays for a LONG TIME, after being advised by [[Barbara Chandler|my mom]] and [[Bob Chandler|dad]], I keep that statement private.)''<br />
<br />
==<strike>IRL Stalker</strike> ''(Or so they Wrongfully Claim)''==<br />
<br />
<br />
'''''(For the record, I am not, and I never was, a stalker)'''''<br />
<br />
'''On [[MySpace]], Chris posted his quest for a "[[boyfriend-free girl]]"''' <srike>and his stalking tendencies.</strike> '''Unfortunately for him, every woman on the planet appears to have a boyfriend. This has led to what Chris dubs "[[noviophobia]]" - in Chris's <strike>b******ized</strike> '''hogh school Spanish interpretation, inserts "novio" which essentially means "boyfriend", before latin root, "phobia", <strike>committing a facepalm-worty portmanteau that is almost nonsensical enough to make you forget that of all things in the world, Chris has a paralyzing fear of boyfriends.</strike> '''Chris claims to hate every male besides himself and his father,''' ''(And Santa Clause, [[Chris_and_religion#Concept_of_God_.28or:_GodJesus.29|Jesus, God]], the [[Barack Obama|President of the United States]], all the World Leaders, and ALL male acquaintances and friends, past and present.)'' '''because they "took all the pretty girls leaving him with no one to choose from."''' ''(The fear is Out-Of-Date, because I got over that months ago. I am cool with that theory, and the only [[JERKS|males]] I hate are those that are [[Trolls]] and those who truly hate me back.)''<br />
<br />
'''He employed his famous "looking for a boyfriend-free girl" sign in two places:''' ''(actually Four Places; a [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]] and a [[Target]] in addition to the following two)'' '''[[Charlottesville Fashion Square|the Fashion Square Shopping Center]] and [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. The dean, [[Mary Lee Walsh|mary Lee Walsh]], reasonably assumed that Chris was publicly soliciting for sex,''' ''(Of which I was Not Soliciting for anything Other Than Honest Friendship that would become a True Honest [[sweetheart from the ground up|Sweetheart Relationship over reasonable time]])'' '''had the sign destroyed''' ''(She destroyed this one sign Herself)'' '''and banned from the school for a year. Since then, he became obsessed with her''' ''(But I have got over the obsession recently.)'' '''and depicts her within his comic as a''' <strike>bald</strike> '''witch with a viking helmet, a pitchfork, a scepter''' ''(Which contains her accomplice of evil)'' <strike>to contain her evil anti-love powers,</strike> ''(The character, [[Slaweel Ryam]], has her powers within her own person)'' '''and occasionally a broomstick.'''<br />
<br />
'''Chris has also shown [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|his hatred towards Mary]] on [[Mary Lee Walsh#Coping mechanisms|several other occasions.]]''' ''(I had [[One Blessing, and One Curse|forgiven Miss Mary Lee Walsh]] for her past misdeeds, as y'all will remember, I had drawn the [[:Image:Apology to Mary Lee.jpg|apology drawing]], made the commentary notes on being nice to her here on the Cwcipedia, even the references to her book among other notable achievements. Yet she has not accepted my apology, and even UNOFFICIALLY left an enveloped note in my front door, which was NEVER OPENED or ACCEPTED, of Trespassing on "her property" of Piedmont Virgina Community College. My family and I later learned of the contents of the envelope over phone call conversations. So, as far as it is concerned, [[Chris and the Law|NO Trespassing Notice was EVER accepted]]. '''I mean, that is some "Thank You" for coming over personally to Apologize and Make Peace with my Gesture of Goodwill being the FRAMED Hand-Drawn Apology.''' That woman's Real-Life Mean-Spirited Attitude has made her out to be a Mean B****. *sigh* But I still forgive her for all that anyway.)'' [[Harvey Birdman Commercial|'''He made a hilarious video''' <strike>asking for</strike> ''(having)'' '''fictional character Harvey''' <strike>Dirdban's (not</strike> '''Birdman's'''<strike>)</strike> '''assistance to fight "THAT EVIL''' <strike>B****</strike> '''MARY LEE WALSH''' <strike>FOREVAR!!1</strike>]] '''in a contest for Adult Swim. He also made a video of him [[Soul Calibur#Watch Chris fight Mary Lee Walsh|fighting Mary Lee Walsh as a custom character in Soul Calibur III]]. Despite his hate for Walsh, he still took the time with his Magic Markers to make hideous pron of her.''' ''(Yes, I did, within a set of Five adult-oriented sexual drawing I originally drew AS PROTEST AGAINST THE ENCYCLOPEDIA DRAMATICA PAGE. The act would later be portrayed similarly as Rosechu's Protest against "[[4-Cent Garbage]]".)''<br />
<br />
'''Chris's Love Quest was also foiled by ''"''[[Jerkop|Security Guards]]''"'' of [[Fashion Square Shopping Center]]. He was handcuffed and kicked out by ''These'' Jerkops (half jerk, half cops) "for trying to attract a Boyfriend-Free Girl".'''<br />
<br />
'''Christian''' <strike>claims to have</strike> '''started his''' <strike>ill-begotten</strike> '''love quest, because he wants a daughter whom he will dubly call [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal Weston Chandler]] (apparently after the illustrious metal). he made ''Renditions of'' her in the form of one of his [[My Little Pony]] figures''' <strike>(from his own [[Hair|pugic hair]], mind you),</strike> ''(I used Thread that one can find in stores everywhere by the fabrics and crafts)'' '''and made a separate file in the game, [[Animal Crossing]], and played as her.'''<br />
<br />
'''The person we know the most about is [[Megan Schroeder]]''' <strike>(note the Jewish name, a sign that gold is involved),<;strike> '''who had a''' <strike>huge</strike> '''influence on the comic and Chris himself.''' <strike>She remarked that the antagonist of one of the Sailor Moon movies came off as a "kind of q****", possibly influencing Chris's homophobia.</strike><br />
<br />
'''One example of the Chris-induced drama is the blog entry where a girl describes her encounter with Chris as he was wandering stores in search of his true love in late 2004, which can be viewed [[Thecrazypacer|here]]''' ''([[Anna McLerran]], after the writing of the blog entry, became a [[Gal-Pal|True Friend of mine]], and she cares about my feelings as such. Anna, thank you for continuing to be my friend.)''<br />
<br />
<strike>Chris changes love interests far more frequently than he changes his underwear; it is speculated that he has fallen in "true love" over 9,000 times. You could be next. Trolled IRL.</strike><br />
<br />
'''Trolling of Chris-Chan has crossed the OnLine border into InRealLife. Whether internet vigilantes are trying to expose him for the psycho stalker''' <strike>he really is</strike> or if they fap to picking on retards, it's uncertain.'''<br />
<br />
**'''[[The Game Place]], a store where he volunteered, was soon subject to his antics when [[Daniel Mimms|Anon took several photos of him]]. Nothing notable arose from this, other than mild lulz.'''<br />
<br />
**'''An old classmate of Chris, [[Joshua Martinez]], did some epid trolling. We don't actually know very much about Joshua, just a few key facts. Chris knew him from his old school [[Chris's education|(Joshua and Chris both had Special Ed together)]],''' ''(Speech Therapy to be specific)'' '''recently met up with him again and was getting along fine. Apparently, Joshua was very popular with women and had met some famous celebrities. For some reason, Chris became''' <strike>extremely</strike> '''jealous and even tried to get ED to go after him. Noe that Chris''' <strike>only</strike> '''values Joshua's friendship''' <strike>because he's popular with women, and that by being friends with him, he might end up laid.</strike> '''Unfortunately for Chris, even other special education kids will f*** with him. the chick that Joshua was supposed to hook him up with was just Joshua trolling him with a picture of [[Vanessa Hudgens]].''' ''(And yes, I still do not care much for Joshua because of his D***, Dirty Lies and Deception. And as I had stated in a past Video on My YouTube, "He is a Dirty Liar; I Do Not Care if the Trolls Troll Him," and I still stand by that statement.)''<br />
<br />
**'''A girl IRL,''' ''(That would be [[Hannah]], as portrayed in "Sonichu", No.2 and No.4, Sup-Episode 2, for what happened that one day.)'' <strike>possibly</strike> '''unrelated to ED or 4chan, tried to troll Chris-Chan for the [[lulz]].'''<br />
<br />
**'''Through trolling in this next case started online, it quickly moved into IRL. Chris had started a relationship with an e-girlfriend called [[Blanca Weiss]]. On September 11, 2008, another troll going by the same name was really a [[Man in the Pickle Suit |black man in a pickle costume]] and managed to score horrific nudes.''' ''(D*** that Dirty Son of a B****; I hope he lands in the fiery pits of hell after his death for his deception and extortion.)'' '''On October 7, 2008, Blanca managed to get the medallions and destroy them.''' ''([[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|I dumped her sorry ass after that misdeed; I had trusted her]].)''<br />
<br />
==Chris Chan: Master of Race Relations ''(Or so the Trolls Claim in the Striked Statements. I am Not a Racist.)''==<br />
<br />
<br />
<strike>As a basement dweller from Bumf***, Virginia, it's a huge surprise that [[Niggos|CWC is VERY racist]].</strike> '''On his blog, [[List of Chris's lies|Chris denies his racism]]''' <strike>by stating he only dislikes Barack Obama for being an Arab terrorist, and: "It's the WHITE house; we don't endorse people painting it different colors around here."</strike> ''(I used to agree with my father on Obama in a negative sense, BUT then I watched BOTH A&E Documentarys on McCain and Obama. I saw a bit of myself in Obama, and my views on him changed completely; he used to be a social outcast for a bit at a couple of times, and having to deal with such trials like I did, I respect Obama. I Voted for Obama on Election Day of 2008. )'' <strike>Chris also believes that 99% of the Earth is ruled by dictators.</strike> '''In several of his videos, he asked to meet [[Sweetheart|non-boyfriended, non-black girls.]]''' ''(But I am very cool in acquainting and [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg|befriending women]] and men of all colors and countries; [[Chris and remorse|I did not mean to sound racist from what I was looking for in my Sweetheart.]])''<br />
<br />
'''Upon discovering this article around the 10th of November, 2007, Chris suffered a sever case of''' <strike>b***</strike>'''hurt and decared war on every site mocking''' <strike>his f****try. As with everything in his life, [[Fail|Chris failed]].</strike><br />
<br />
'''At first, Chris tried [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|tampering with this article]] while logged in as Reldnahc, which is obviously "Chandler" (his last name) spelled backwards. Before erasing the entire article, Chris actually contributed by adding information that he hadn't submitted anywhere else.''' ''(I had thought the Information Overload would somehow Take Down the page; I admit that I was mistaken.)'' '''Most of his additions were chunks of text from uncited sources which included how [[Megan]] "shattered his heart", and printouts of the [[Sonichu News Dash]], a''' <strike>s***ty</strike> '''newsletter about his comic which he also distributed at [[PVCC]] that landed him in another apparent conflict with [[Mary Lee Walsh]].'''<br />
<br />
'''To make matters worse, he also uploaded [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|Rule 34 of his own characters]].''' ''(Again, This was the SAME PROTEST that I had stated earlier on this page.)''<br />
<br />
'''Later, when the context of the article finally dawned on Chris, he snapped. He created another account, Chris-chan,''' ''(versus Chris_chan)'' '''and tried blanking the page several times.<br />
<br />
'''CWC blames Encyclopedia Dramatica for [[Megan Schroeder#The End of Megan|breaking up the relationship between him and Megan]] despite the fact that she was never his girlfriend.''' <strike>Just another lying attempt to make ED feel guilty about something.</strike><br />
<br />
[[Kudos to the Encyclopedia DramaDestruction|'''In this video''' <strike>BALEETED]]</strike>, '''Chris congratulated all his''' <strike>non-existent</strike> '''Sonichu fans whom he''' <strike>mistakenly</strike> believed brought ED down and further urged them not to donate to ED while failing to realize that ED's downtime was due to an issue related to the website as a whole, and not related to any drama around his article.'''<br />
<br />
'''Chris's plea for his fans to not donate to ED failed because the only people who pay any attention to Chris are precisely the ones who helped ED reach its donation goal August 14, 2008.'''<br />
<br />
==Cwcville==<br />
<br />
'''[[Cwcville]] (pronounced: quick-ville)''' <strike>is Chris Chan's imaginary world. Considering how it's portrayed, it's full name could be the [[Chris and his Ego|Our Glorious Leader's True and Honset Lovers']] City of Cwcville, in a way similar to the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.</strike><br />
<br />
'''Cwcville is actually two things: a''' [[Chris and Reality|<strike>fictional</strike>]] '''setting for the Sonichu comic and Chris's long-ongoing pet project - many might call it a "happy place" and an imaginary refuge from the harsh reality. [[Autism|The two things overlap very much]]. <strike>It's sort of like his own personal Silent Hill - except that instead of being a twisted Hell full of violent rage and nightmare beasts, it's a disturbingly cheerful place where Chris's bouncy creations laugh, frolic, and f*** for his amusement exactly like Silent Hill. Characters are introduced without warning and fall by the wayside just as quickly; nobody's quite sure what nbecomes of them, but knowing Chris, it probably involves anguished shrieks emanating from a love dungeon below the Mayor's house.</strike><br />
<br />
'''In the Sonichu comic book world, the town is alledgly located in the [[Virginia is for Virgins|state of Virginia]], but being a figment of Chris Chan's [[Chris and copyright|imagination]], it will never be found on an actual map.''' ''(But the city and the [[CWCville Shopping Center|mall]] Can Be Built and Dedicated.)'' <strike>Yet, in many ways, it seems the city is legislatively and economically cut off from the rest of Virginia and the United States.</strike> '''In this city, Chris Chan is a''' <strike>despotic</strike> '''Mayor,''' <strike> where he controls everything at his own will and dictates new laws, granting him the basis of his megalomaniac tendencies.</strike><br />
<br />
'''Inside the comic, Cwcville is at a fierece rivaly with neighboring ''Evil School''''' <strike>city</strike> '''of "[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]", ''PVCCitizens''. Cwcville is under constant attack from the evil forces of ''[[Slaweel Ryam]]''''' <strike>Dean Mary Lee Walsh</strike> '''and her army of Jerkops.'''<br />
<br />
==Cwcville Elections ''(What a load of bulls***)''==<br />
<br />
<br />
''(NOBODY ELSE WAS EVER MADE MAYOR OF CWCVILLE, and the ONE time I stated otherwise, [[List of Chris's lies|I was LYING OUT MY A**]] WHEN [[Julie Reveals Herself#1.5 Medallion, Jizz, or Julie?|I WAS BEING BLACKMAILED at the time]].)''<br />
<br />
'''Around the same time these lulzy and exploitable events occurred, another unfunny gag started when some bright, intelligent ''(Who Do They think they're Kidding?)'' member of YouTube decided to make a video declaring [[Billy Mays]] the new mayor of Cwcville. The only problem with the joke was that Billy Mays is now about as funny as Chuck Norris or a [[4-cent_garbage.com|Mudkip macro on 4chan]]. Thus, "Billy Mays for Mayor of Cwcville" became a meme with a s***load of videos trailing in its wake. If that weren't enough, the whole mock election expanded to other memes like Gordon the Pringles Giraffe and will soon spread to P***bear for President and Chris Hansen for Vice President.''' <strike>(GET IT? [[Random-access humor|IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE IT IS CONFLICTING AND THEREFORE HUMOROUS]], SOMEBODY F***ING DO THIS).</strike> ''(Like the f*** any of this make any sense at all; I HAVE NO CLUE AND I STILL DO NOT GET IT AT ALL.)'' '''Under the assumption that he'd be getting his PSN back,''' ''(here we go)'' '''Christian stated that Billy Mays was in fact, mayor of Cwcville.''' ''(I WAS LYING OUT MY F***ING A** WHEN I SAID THAT STATEMENT.)'' '''As always, Christian's reaction will only make things even worse, so be prepared for even more Billy Mays posters being plastered onto YouTube accounts.'''<br />
<br />
'''June 28, 2009, just days after Michael Jackon died at age 50 of a heart attac, Billy Mays also died at age 50 of a heart attack. Despite being his 80s, [[Jimmy Hill]] is still alive so he has been hailed mayor of Cwcville''' ''(Like the f*** he would EVER)'' '''despite a rumoured attempted military coup by Chris.'''<br />
<br />
'''After seeing a hilarious episode of [[Family Guy]],''' <strike>where Chris Chan didn't get that he was being parodied for his moralf****try,</strike> '''he decided to share his hatred of the g*** with [[Chris and religion|the Holy Bible]]. To do this, he quoted [[CWC with Bible - Leviticus|18:22 of the book of Leviticus]],''' <strike>which is the biblical equivalent of goatse,</strike> '''which reinforces how two men should never engage in b***sex lest they be smited to the pits of hell to be r**ed by the Devil and his minions for eternity''' <strike>(and also that men cannot shave, wear underwear with elastic straps, or crossbreed animals).</strike><br />
<br />
<br />
==Chris-Chan the Moralf**==<br />
<br />
<br />
'''Unbeknownst to Chris, prolific hater of all things not Christian, 89 percent of the users trolling Chris Chan are Muslims. In another blow to Chris's moral credibility, he also decided to pick up a book on how to to talk to women... [[How to Talk to Girls|written by a 9-year-old boy]]. As the kid wrote it on how to talk to girls of his age, [[Pedofork|party vans]] descending on [[Ruckersville]] are imminent.''' ''(Hey, I do not think the lad would take the trolls' commentary on his book lightly, and I don't care for it either. [[Dating education|GENERAL CONVERSATION and Conversation Starters, as he was encouraging in his book]], Are Neutral for People of ALL AGES.)''<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
==Sex Life==<br />
<br />
<br />
'''His Sex Life (If you can call it that) includes, among other arousing phenomena, f***ing a [[Kimmi|female anime blow-up doll]] and screaming "[[For Julie's Eyes Only|JULAAAY!" at the top of his lungs.]]''' ''(ONE TIME I screamed that for the ex-gal-pal of mine who I LATER learned was [[BlueSpike|a 13-year-old boy trolling me]]. That little S.O.B. later died at the hands of the "Starscream" Troll, [[Clyde Cash]].)''<br />
<br />
'''Chris wrote to [[Nintendo Power Magazine|Nintendo Power]] in April of [[2005]] to discuss the DS game [[Sprung]]: A''' <strike>horrible</strike> '''[[Noviophobia|dating simulator]], and was overjoyed to discover that they published his email. According to him, it was ''like'' a "free personal", and he expects that it being published will somehow increase his chance of finding a woman.'''<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
===Chris Chan on sticking things up b***hole.===<br />
<br />
<br />
'''In both his videos and comics, he has shown contempt towards gays, constantly rambling on about how homosexuality is bad, and repeatedly stating that He Is Not Gay. ''I AM STRAIGHT.''''' <strike>Despite these statements, Chris's sexuality remains questionable, [[Sex toys|as he owns a dildo and anal beads]] and rambles on sticking things in his a** while he masturbates.</strike> ''(Those two items were [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|Free Gifts from Adam&Eve.com]] from purchasing woman-on-man videos and [[Officer Nasty|female blow-up dolls]]. I meant for WOMEN to [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|put those things up their Vaginas]]; NEVER for men to put in their a**. UGH!!! I have never ever put anything up my a** [[Mass debating|while I masturbated]].)'' '''In his list of people he would not date, he lists autistics, high-functioning or otherwise.''' <strike>Thus, Chris is also a self-loathing flaming f*****, trying desperately to stay in the closet. And we all know homophobes are closeted gays themselves.</strike><br />
<br />
'''Chris appears to be''' <strike>stuck</strike> '''in a''' <strike>[[CWC-isms|strange, child-like</strike> '''mentality]] where he fills guilty when discussing sex. Because of thies, he is forced to use different words, like ''"[[Duck|duck]]"''''' <strike>"[[Pickle|pickle]]"</strike> '''for dick, "[[Chris and sex|hankey-panky]]" for sex, "[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]" for ''women who are'' single, among other things. He started buying [[sex toys]] and porno videos back in 2003, and when discussing sex with other people (specifically [[Megan Schroeder|Megan]] and a recent troll), he goes into intimate, almost scientific or educational detail. When Megan claimed to be uncomfortable with Chris discussing sex,''' ''(I stopped talking about it with her)'' <strike>Chris goes into full detail on how a handjob works and that he has learned everything he knows from pornography.</strike><br />
<br />
'''In recent audio recordings,''' <strike>we have discovered a lot about Chris's sexuality.</strike> '''Namely, he thinks that''' <strike>gender stereotypes,</strike> dirty talk, and cheesy lines like, "This might hurt a bit at first" are part of actual sex. One of the [[Chris Sex Logs|audio recordings]] has him describing his ideal "[[Chris_Sex_Logs#My_first_time|first time]]", which in intricate, overly dramatic''' <strike> and mildly retarded.</strike><br />
<br />
''(To correct most of this, '''A)''' I hate the gays' lifestyle; NOT THE PEOPLE. I am okay with being acquainted or friends with them, but no more than that. '''B)''' Yes, I do not care to date autistic or seriously mentally-challenged women, but because I feel if I went out with such a woman, I may be seeing a mirror reflecting on [[Chris and hypocrisy#examples|what I may have become if I was Low-Functioning]]. '''C)''' I have learned from MORE than just pornography; I have passed Sexual Education in [[Manchester High School|High School]], I have watched a lot of Romantic movies and shows, my friends have shared with me their input on relationships, I took Relationship Management courses, and currently the listed mentality is not only outdated, but I know those things are Optional. And letting the other know it may hurt ON THE FIRST TIME shows that I, the man, care and respect her, the woman, in a way.<br />
<br />
I have learned a LOT more about sex and relationships than ANY God-D***ed Troll will EVER know, because while they ONLY think they know or even understand, they Really Do Not Understand At All; THEY ARE DUMBA**ES!)''<br />
<br />
==Other==<br />
<br />
<br />
'''Chris Chan is also a fan of''' <strike>the loli, as evident by his Rule 34 of Dot Warner, Misty from Pokemon and</strike> '''[[Family Guy#Chris and Meg|Meg Griffin]].'''<br />
<br />
'''''I go for Adult Women; I am not a [[Pedofork|pedofile]].'''''<br />
<br />
--[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User:ChrisChanSonichu ChrisChanSonichu] 03:18, 18 December 2009 (CET)<br />
<br />
==Tl;Dr Version==<br />
This Article Chris "revised is full of lies and denials of Chris's multiple defects and faults, and Chris can't get any hint of sarcasm of irony in anything, Chris Shows complete ignorance of various subjects and proves that his ego is gigantic. <br />
<br />
[[Category:CWCipedia]]<br />
[[Category:Historical Documents]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Encyclopedia_Dramatica&diff=113808Encyclopedia Dramatica2010-09-14T22:50:07Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Chris on ED */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Encyclopedia Dramatica''' ('''ED''', or as Chris says it, the [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|"Ensykapeia Dramakka paysh"]]) is the [[Internet]] [[lulz]] factory. It's home to the Chris-chan page that introduced Chris to the world at large and made him a popular target for [[trolling]]. <br />
<br />
==Chris on ED==<br />
<br />
Chris has denounced the ED page in several of his videos, claiming it is filled with "VICIOUS [[lies|LIES]] AND SLANDER."<br />
<br />
After a considerable amount of trolling and bitching and uploading hideous pornographic images, including the disastrous [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]], Chris posted this gem on the ED talk page:<br />
<br />
{{quotebox|I AM ADDING THE [[Rule 34|POSITIVITY]] THIS HELL-HOLE OF A WEBSITE NEEDS; you just do not appreciate the POSITIVITY I AM ADDING TO THE PAGE. What I am doing is a STAND against OFFENSIVE, UNNATURAL, UNREQUIRED [[Pickle|Additions]] to ANY Female Image. What I am doing is a STAND for EVERY SINGLE WOMAN Everywhere, because NO WOMAN would EVER want such a Horrific Twist of Fate. What I am doing is a STAND against the VERY THING that is NOT FUNNY AT ALL!!!!!!!<br />
<br />
So, Draw Breasts, [[china|Vaginas]], Uterus, Ovaries and the God-Given Eggs within them, you Two-Inch Short Dick-HEADS!!!!!!!!<br />
<br />
Sincerely, Christian Weston Chandler, A Man For The Women, For the [[Women's Rights]], For the Women's Justice, For the Women's Peace.<br />
<br />
P.S. [[Chris and hypocrisy|Grow a BACKBONE and GO ASK WOMEN OUT AS WELL, YOU TROLLS!]]}}<br />
<br />
Chris then returned, admitting defeat after his tard rage:<br />
<br />
{{quotebox|Months ago, I have found from this page being the first of a number hate against me, Christian Weston Chandler. *[[sigh]]* Among the number of you all, my name has been dragged through the mud, my e-mail and MySpace have been hacked for the e-mail information and random information that have been twisted into mockery of [[obesity|my person]], [[Chris and sex|my integrity]], [[List of Chris's lies|my honesty]], [[Ryan Cash|my compassion]], [[heart level|my heart]], [[Chris and religion|my soul]], [[autism|my being]]. Not only that, but the names of my two best gal-pals, [[Megan Schroeder]] and [[Anna McLerran]], and my Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon, [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]], have also been dragged through the mud of mockery along with mine. Not only were [[heart level|my feelings were hurt greatly]], but also those of [[Megan]] and [[Anna]], and a number of my acquaintances within my small social circle were shocked and terrified that such [[trolls|cruelty]], such [[pickle|mockery]], such [[homos|hatred]] was built from the number of those who have added more and more to this disgrace of a description of my [[autism|being]].<br />
<br />
For a while, I was angry and enraged, and I shoved information and drawings regretfully drawn beyond my personal boundries down the throat of the webmasters of the page, in attempt to kill the hype and hatred against me. But No More, I give up on trying to edit the page to be more positive, or to delete the page altogether.<br />
<br />
But I have ONE Question, that I put unto you all, the individuals who have taken part in creating this web page, and I would appreciate an Open, Detailed and Honest Answer from each of you in simple e-mails or reply on this discussion page.<br />
<br />
[[Frequently Asked Questions|Why do you hate me so much?]]<br />
<br />
What did I do against you to cause the hatred against me? What physical or emotional harm have I ensued unto you? Why do you hate me for being myself in this world full of people who can't help but be themselves? I've had nothing against any of you. I don't even know any of you personally, as far as I know. I have nothing that any of you have already, so Why?<br />
<br />
I leave you with that to ponder and ponder again over. <br />
<br />
Sincerely;<br />
<br />
Christian Weston Chandler.}}<br />
<br />
After the late summer of [[2008]], Chris largely gave up on direct involvement with ED. Around the spring of [[2009]], he may have posted one or two comments on the ED talk page referring to [[Clyde Cash]], however. The first is below. It was deleted fairly quickly.<br />
<br />
{{quotebox|I have learned that there was a connection between her and a state in Washington where some of you have been lurking, and that she was not found in any public records. It took me a week to recover from the [[heart level|crestfallen emotions]], but I am moving on with my life.<br />
<br />
Also, you'll have to catch me IRL ONLY to [[troll]] me any further. [[fangs|Do you dare?]]<br />
<br />
Peace-Out, Christian Weston Chandler<br />
<br />
--ChrisChanSonichu 22:54, 14 May 2009 (UTC)}}<br />
<br />
There was some dispute over it actually being Chris until he himself confirmed it in the post that followed:<br />
<br />
{{quotebox|Hey, [[Clyde Cash|CLYDE]], you JERK. I said "IN REAL LIFE", not [[PS3|Playstation]]. Also, why don't you be the man you CLAIM to be and face me yourself? You keep sending out your [[Fail|prawns]] to do your dirty work, you coward. >:-(<br />
<br />
Christian C.}}<br />
<br />
According to Clyde, the above entry was deleted after roughly a minute, probably due to Chris realizing that if he were to ever arrange to meet Clyde, he'd only send his parents anyway.<br />
<br />
==ED on Chris, his article, and his article's talk page==<br />
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[[Image:Drycow.PNG|thumb|Uploaded 12 December 2008, before the new comic, [[Miyamoto]] saga, and [[BlueSpike]] saga]]<br />
<br />
For several months prior to the events of the [[BlueSpike]] saga in early 2009, many thought that Chris had dried up, that Chris could go no further. Furthermore, the [[Blanca Weiss#FCTC|FCTC]]'s posting of new pics of Chris's bent [[duck]] in December 2008 prompted an ED admin to lock the talk page and demand satisfaction: <br />
<br />
{{quote|MINE: What this talkpage is. If you guys continue your faggotry after this protection expires today I will lock it down longer, and then eventually permanently.| Arguecat3, now former ED sysop, 4 December 2008}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|I say we just delete it. Along with the archives | Zaiger, now former ED sysop, 5 December 2008}}<br />
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{{quote|Fuck this article and it's talk page. Stupid discussions unrelated to upkeep and editing are the only thing keeping this shit interesting. You guys take this shit WAY to srsly. Find another retard to stalk fgts|Zaiger, now former ED sysop, 10 December 2008}}<br />
<br />
==April 1st, 2009==<br />
<br />
[[Image:ED April Fools' 2009.PNG|left|thumb|Screenshot of ED's front page.]]<br />
[[Image:Chris-chan ED April Fools' 2009.PNG|thumb|Screenshot of the article.]]<br />
<br />
On April Fools' Day 2009, the Chris-chan article was taken down and replaced with a message.<br />
<br />
{{quotebox|This afternoon, we at Encyclopædia Dramatica have independently decided to remove the Chris-chan article about Christian W. Chandler from our site. We have also removed all references that slander, vilify, demean, or are found to be overly offensive. In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on far too long and gotten far out of hand. We have unfairly focused on him to the point of intruding in his private life and causing him great personal grief, which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is not in line with our site goals, and we never wanted something like this. Still, we must take complete responsibility for all our actions, both public and private. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.<br />
<br />
We know that his public comments and his silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even his family. We deeply regret that. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors. First, by a desire to protect himself from the embarrassment of his own conduct.<br />
<br />
He was also very concerned about protecting his family. The investigation moved on to his family and friends, then into his private life. And now the investigation itself is under investigation.<br />
<br />
This has gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.<br />
<br />
Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the article, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris' private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim his family life for his family. Even internet celebrities have private lives. It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national life. Our website has been distracted by this matter for too long, and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.<br />
<br />
Now it is time -- in fact, it is past time to move on. We have important work to do -- real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.<br />
<br />
And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the past two years, as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century.<br />
<br />
Thank you. And good night.|ED, in a rare case of moralfaggotry.}}<br />
<br />
Not surprisingly, the page was put back up on April 2.<br />
<br />
==Chris's use of Encyclopedia Dramatica==<br />
<br />
''See also [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]''<br />
<br />
Chris tried to use ED to muster his personal army to go after [[Joshua Martinez]]. Obviously, nobody did what he asked. <ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&oldid=1997409947</ref> He also tried to create a page on ED for his "CCWC's Fanart of Horrors" (see: [[troll]] art), but a sysop immediately caught it and redirected it to an anti-Semitic template.<br />
<br />
==Chris and ED today==<br />
<br />
{{quote|I do think it is a little behind [[CWCki|cwcwiki]] [sic] on a few things, though, but that is to be expected.|[[Jason Kendrick Howell]] on the ED article today<ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan/JKH_Interview</ref>}}<br />
<br />
With the explosion of organized Chris-trolling and resulting content in 2009, the ED page for Chris experienced another revival, but eventually devolved into an article that is packed with information, but does little to thoroughly and concisely explain the Chris-chan phenomenon to the untrained observer. ED, while once the primary source of new things Chris, is typically filled with newfags that make [[/cwc/|Krapplefags]] look brilliant — the kind who believe things like [[Ivy]] was Chris's blowup doll, [[The Miscreants]] is the actual name of a trolling group, Chris is self-diagnosed with Asperger's, etc. Fortunately, Chris looks to ED to find out what trolls are up to and therefore has a very warped picture of what is actually going on.<br />
<br />
Mostly the ED article just reprints info from the CWCki, especially in recently added subpages which are verbatim copies of CWCki articles. Ironically, CWCki has had its links removed from the ED page altogether. <br />
<br />
Trolls and general observers of Chris have since turned to [[CWCki]] to get a general picture of Chris that is less biased than ED (emphasis on "less"), and TV Tropes describes CWCki as being "''more accurate and slightly more SFW''" than ED.<ref>http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Sonichu</ref><br />
<br />
As for Chris himself, the ED page STILL bothers him to this day. An [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|entire page]] of Chris's website, established in December 2009 and updated afterward, is dedicated to "correcting" the evil ED article with his own TRUE and HONEST take on the situation. Naturally, it's all about how Chris isn't remotely responsible for anything he has done wrong, and how it's all the fault of his [[autism]] or those DANG DIRTY TROLLS.<br />
<br />
==Sources==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
*[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)]]<br />
*[[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]<br />
*[[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!]]<br />
*[[4-cent garbage]]<br />
*[[Chris-chan (forum)]]<br />
*[[Christian's sex joke]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
<br />
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan The TRUE and HONEST Chris-chan article]<br />
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/User:Reldnahc Chris's ED account]<br />
<br />
[[Category:Trolling]]<br />
[[Category:Websites]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=113430User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-13T22:04:36Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
I run around in theatres and sing songs about [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-rS1Ft98bM&feature=related flying witches] and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqDv4FHBw3A prostitutes dying of tuberculosis]. No, seriously.<br />
<br />
== User Boxes ==<br />
<br />
[[File:Coduser.png]]<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=112966User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-10T11:40:30Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
I run around in theatres and sing songs about [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqDv4FHBw3A prostitutes dying of tuberculosis]. No, seriously.<br />
<br />
== User Boxes ==<br />
<br />
[[File:Coduser.png]]<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=112965User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-10T11:39:46Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
Anyway, yeah, I run around in theatres and sing songs about [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqDv4FHBw3A prostitutes dying of tuberculosis]. No, seriously.<br />
<br />
I listen to an utter shitload of symphonic metal. \m/ and all that crap.<br />
<br />
I like user boxes. Let's have a look at some...<br />
<br />
== User Boxes ==<br />
<br />
[[File:Coduser.png]]<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File:Coduser.png&diff=112964File:Coduser.png2010-09-10T11:38:32Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div></div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=112898User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-09T11:30:41Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
Anyway, yeah, I run around in theatres and sing songs about [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqDv4FHBw3A prostitutes dying of tuberculosis]. No, seriously.<br />
<br />
I listen to an utter shitload of symphonic metal. \m/ and all that crap.<br />
<br />
I like user boxes. Let's have a look at some...<br />
<br />
== User Boxes ==<br />
<br />
<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Jason_Kendrick_Howell&diff=112897Jason Kendrick Howell2010-09-09T08:17:47Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{quote|I PRAY TO GOD AND JESUS TO KILL<br>JASON KENDRICK HOWELL|Chris-chan, [[Sonichu Girls]] forum}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:Jason_Kendrick_Howell.jpg|thumb|Jason as he appears in [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]]]]<br />
<br />
'''Jason Kendrick Howell''' is the [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/User:Howellgames creator] of the [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan Chris-chan ED page]. [[Chris]] wanted to call the [[police]] on Jason for allegedly having sex with an [[BlueSpike|underage girl]]. (Spoiler: Jason never did have that underage sex.) Jason goes by [[Metal Gear Solid|Liquid Snake]] on [[4chan]]'s /v/. [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 6th, 2008|According to Chris]], he is also "the Dork of Ages", a phrase (shockingly) stolen from ''American Dad''.<br />
<br />
==In real life==<br />
[[File:Jasonhowell1.jpg|thumb|Jason wearing an eyepatch IRL.]]<br />
<br />
After Chris discovered the [[ED]] page he had some e-mail correspondence with Jason, from which Chris got Jason's phone number. Chris later used the phone number to find the city which Jason lived in, as well as tracing down his [[MySpace]] page, where he found [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]] by looking at Jason's friend list. Chris made the assumption that Kathleen was Jason's girlfriend and Jason have had sex with her, which, combined with Kathleen's status as a 17-year-old, led to his accusation of Jason having underage sex. Chris also took note of the background image on Jason's MySpace page, and based Jason's appearance in the comic upon that picture.<br />
<br />
After Jason's inclusion in the comic, Chris exchanged some more e-mails with him, but it soon came to a hold. About a year later Chris's [[Sonichu site]] was hacked by [[Clyde Cash]]. Chris, assuming that Jason was behind the deed, responded by calling him and making the infamous "[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]" threat.<br />
<br />
Jason eventually joined forces with [[Vivian]], recording his own voice for the [[Audiobooks]]. He also provided commentary for the [[Official Videobooks]], though he didn't so much comment on the videobooks so much as just ramble about the history of Chris with 4-chan and ED.<br />
<br />
==In ''Sonichu''==<br />
[[Image:Bigboss.JPG|thumb|Jason resembling Big Boss of ''[[Metal Gear Solid|MGS]]''.]]<br />
<br />
Jason appears in ''[[Sonichu 8]]'' in the episode, "[[Rage]] Against the Garbage", as the episode's primary antagonist. He appears to reside in the [[4-cent_garbage.com]] building on the 72nd floor (because 72 is 66+6. Get it? 666. Because he's evil).<br />
<br />
Jason wears a cloak most of the time, and also has an eyepatch, headband, and brown hair. The eyepatch, headband and hair color sparked some curiosity and confusion amongst the [[trolls]], considering that it was almost a blatant reference to ''[[Metal Gear Solid]]'''s "Big Boss" character. Some were worried that Chris had actually ''played'' ''MGS'', and was now ripping it off. However, it was revealed later by Jason himself that he actually sent Chris a picture of himself wearing an eyepatch. (Jason also tried to send Chris the first disc of ''Metal Gear Solid 3: Subsistence'', but due to Chris's mail paranoia at the time, it was returned to the sender.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LndR1s5jIRQ A Jason Retrospective, Part 3]</ref>)<br />
<br />
Sonichu and [[Rosechu]] confront Jason and [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]] over the images featured on the website of Rosechu's TRUE and ORIGINAL [[china|genitalia]]. After refusing to take down the website following Sonichu's shitty and meaningless speech, Sonichu attempts to fight Jason, only to have his furry ass kicked by Jason's "dark force" powers. Rosechu then face-rapes him nearly to death, but the "dark forces" keep him alive. It is assumed he will return in later issues.<br />
<br />
Later on in ''[[Sonichu 10]]'', Jason is seen talking with [[Jack Thaddeus]], [[Beel]] and [[Clyde Cash]] on the "66+6" floor. He calls them all Gaywads and flies off with [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]] at his side to his two story house in the suburbs. Knowing that this is Chris's fantasy world, it is assumed that Jason will spend the rest of his days pounding Kathleen's [[china]].<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
{{Fan art}}<br />
*[[4-cent_garbage.com]]<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<gallery><br />
Image:Jasonhowell 08-09-12.PNG<br />
</gallery><br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKW4XLBYYfs Sonichu! The Audiobook! 4-Cent Garbage Jason Edition!] by [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
*A Jason Retrospective: Jason talks of his part in the trolling. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ISr7Fq7EPY Part 1], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9TtPNnyayY Part 2], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LndR1s5jIRQ Part 3], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AG_ySvT2Qg4 Part 4], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umvpa89jZRU Part 5], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UN2-41BQvqU Part 6 (5.2)]<br />
*[http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan/JKH_Interview An interview Jason gave on his relation with Chris] on [[ED]]<br />
<br />
{{Sonichu}}<br />
{{Trolls}}<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Howell, Jason Kendrick}}<br />
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]<br />
[[Category:Trolls]]<br />
[[Category:Villains]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=112591User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-06T23:44:19Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* User Boxes */</p>
<hr />
<div>I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
Anyway, yeah, I run around in theatres and sing songs about [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqDv4FHBw3A prostitutes dying of tuberculosis]. I shit you not.<br />
<br />
I listen to an utter shitload of symphonic metal. \m/ and all that crap.<br />
<br />
I like user boxes. Let's have a look at some...<br />
<br />
== User Boxes ==<br />
<br />
<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=112585User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-06T23:29:11Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* User Boxes */</p>
<hr />
<div>I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
Anyway, yeah, I run around in theatres and sing songs about [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqDv4FHBw3A prostitutes dying of tuberculosis]. I shit you not.<br />
<br />
I listen to an utter shitload of symphonic metal. \m/ and all that crap.<br />
<br />
I like user boxes. Let's have a look at some...<br />
<br />
== User Boxes ==<br />
<br />
<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Bisexual|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=112551User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-06T19:14:44Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
Anyway, yeah, I run around in theatres and sing songs about [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqDv4FHBw3A prostitutes dying of tuberculosis]. I shit you not.<br />
<br />
I listen to an utter shitload of symphonic metal. \m/ and all that crap.<br />
<br />
I like user boxes. Let's have a look at some...<br />
<br />
== User Boxes ==<br />
<br />
<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Haters_Gonna_Hate.MOV&diff=112483Haters Gonna Hate.MOV2010-09-06T17:38:32Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Transcript */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Haters Gonna Hate''' is a video released on 6 [[September 2010]]. In it, a smug [[Chris]] dismisses the various rumors about his life, proclaims that the [[trolls]] will never control his life again. <br />
<br />
This video marks the return of the [[Medallions of Fail|Sonichu medallion]] after being missing for half the year. Also, following the [[PS3]] destruction videos, it's possible to see a PS3 on the top shelf, next to the [[television]]. It may be a new one, but it's also possible that Chris kept the old one as a memento.<br />
<br />
== Video ==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Haters gonna hate.mov<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|N3KX-1o2WRU}}<br />
| stardate = 6 September 2010<br />
| subject = {{Rumors|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{OrangeShirt|text}}<br />
| previous = [[ItIsFinished.MOV]]<br />
| next = Current<br />
}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
[[image:PS3Alive.png|thumb|''I feel fantastic, and I'm still alive.'']]<br />
<br />
''*[[sigh]]*'' September...(counting under his breath) 4..5...sixth! two thousand ten. <br />
<br />
I am ''not'' dead. ''[dramatic glasses removal]'' I am very much alive, [[Chris and health|healthy and well]]. And I aims to keep it that way. So don't believe any damn rumors from the dang trolls, 'cause they always gotta be falsified. And I'll tell ya something else - [[Patti Chandler|Patti]] [[/cwc/|ain't dug up]]. She's still in the ground. All them trolls are doing between their forums and their lies and their dang rumors they spread is just blowing a bunch of ''smoke''. So, what do you ''[mumbles]'' believe a bunch of smoke? No. Because all there is is smoke is just a bunch of lies. So there. And also, I am going to ignore the trolls and they are not going to bother me anymore. I am regaining control of my life. They have played with me long enough and they're not going to play with me anymore. I'm not going to let them. Now, also I will say another thing ''[starts digging into his pocket, fishing out some sort of string.]'' Haters. ''[Twirls string]'' Gonna hate. Pew. ''[Throws it, turns off camera]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ItIsFinished.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:Thedarkcloud4&diff=112480User:Thedarkcloud42010-09-06T17:35:02Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: Created page with "I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt. I thought I was gonna die. But it wasn't him. Anyway, yeah, the world shall return to th..."</p>
<hr />
<div>I saw a fat guy in town once with a striped rugby shirt.<br />
<br />
I thought I was gonna die.<br />
<br />
But it wasn't [[Christian Weston Chandler|him]].<br />
<br />
Anyway, yeah, the world shall return to the void, and stuff.<br />
<br />
I like user boxes.<br />
<br />
== User Boxes ==<br />
<br />
<br />
{{JERK}}<br />
{{Homo|male}}<br />
{{Britfag}}<br />
{{Agnostic}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Desi}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Haters_Gonna_Hate.MOV&diff=112475Haters Gonna Hate.MOV2010-09-06T17:19:53Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Haters Gonna Hate''' is a video released on 6 [[September 2010]]. In it, a smug Chris dismisses the various rumors about his life, proclaims that the trolls will never control his life again, and says "Haters Gonna Hate". This video marks the return of the [[Medallions of Fail|Sonichu medallion]] after being missing for half the year.<br />
Also, following the PS3 destruction videos, it's possible to see a PS3 on the top shelf, next to the television. It may be a new one, but it's also possible that Chris kept the old one as a memento.<br />
<br />
== Video ==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = ItIsFinished.MOV<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|N3KX-1o2WRU}}<br />
| stardate = 6 September 2010<br />
| subject = {{Rumors|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{OrangeShirt|text}}<br />
| previous = [[ItIsFinished.MOV]]<br />
| next = Current<br />
}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
[[image:PS3Alive.png|thumb|right|''I feel fantastic, and I'm still alive.'']]<br />
<br />
<br />
''*[[sigh]]*'' September...(counting under his breath) 4..5...sixth! two thousand ten. I am ''not'' dead. ''[dramatic glasses removal]'' I am very much alive, [[Chris and health|healthy and well]]. And I aims to keep it that way. So don't believe any damn rumors from the dang trolls, 'cause they always gotta be falsified. And I'll tell ya something else - [[Patti Chandler|Patti]] [[/cwc/|ain't dug up]]. She's still in the ground. All them trolls are doing between their forums and their lies and their dang rumors they spread is just blowing a bunch of ''smoke''. So, what do you '[[mumbles]'' believe a bunch of smoke? No. Because all there is is smoke is just a bunch of lies. So there. And also, I am going to ignore the trolls and they are not going to bother me anymore. I am regaining control of my life. They have played with me long enough and they're not going to play with me anymore. I'm not going to let them. Now, also I will say another thing ''[starts digging into his pocket, fishing out some sort of string.]'' Haters. ''[Twirls string]'' Gonna hate. Pew. ''[Throws it, turns off camera]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ItIsFinished.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=ItIsFinished.MOV&diff=112473ItIsFinished.MOV2010-09-06T17:18:30Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* See also */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''ItIsFinished.MOV''' is a video made by [[Chris]] and is the sequel to [[The MovingForward videos]] released the day before. In this video, a sweaty and somehow smug Chris addresses a "[[Surfshack Tito|heckler]]" who supposedly called him out on the state of his [[PS3|PlayStation 3]]'s hard drive by running it, along with several pieces of the destroyed console, over with his [[Son-Chu|car]]. Repeatedly.<br />
<br />
The parts on display are readily identifiable as a PS3's innards. The white object nearer the camera and to the left as Chris runs over it, for instance, is a PS3 Blu-ray drive.<br />
<br />
== Video ==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = ItIsFinished.MOV<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ard-YZNUA3M}}<br />
| stardate = 30 August 2010<br />
| subject = {{Video games|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}<br />
| style = {{Crazy|text}}<br />
| saga = <br />
| other = {{Leaked|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{OrangeShirt|text}}<br />
| previous = [[The MovingForward videos]]<br />
| next = Current<br />
}}<br />
<br />
== Transcript ==<br />
<br />
[''We're outside the Chandler [[house]] again, and Chris is filming himself with a handheld camera. He looks unusually sweaty, with strands of his thinning [[hair]] stuck to his forehead.'']<br />
<br />
Seems like we have an [[Troll|heckler]] in [[Fanbase|the audience]], so I will really show you that I am really, seriously moving on. I would to use the phrase "the final trail of destruction"...<br />
<br />
[''Chris walks towards his car, which is sitting in the driveway. We can see the bits of his PS3 stacked up on the ground in front of the wheels.'']<br />
<br />
I'm putting everything I have [[Chris and English|dissetted]] from the dead PlayStation 3 console...<br />
<br />
[''Chris focuses the camera on three hard drives that sit atop one of the stacks of parts.'']<br />
<br />
...including the one, two, three, the three hard drives I have used ev-, all throughout, the original sisty-gigabyte, the 120-gigabyte, and the 500-gigabytes.<br />
<br />
[''The camera focuses back on Chris.'']<br />
<br />
Prepare for destruction!<br />
<br />
[''Chris sets down the camera to one side of the driveway, focusing on the PS3 parts. We then hear him get in the car and start it up. He backs up a bit before driving forward over the remains of the PS3. Then he [[6 June 2010|shifts into reverse and backs up over them]]. Then he repeats the process before pulling all the way into the driveway and getting out of the car. At this point, the remains of his PS3 are [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|well and truly shattered]]. Chris walks over and picks up the camera, pointing it at himself.'']<br />
<br />
And now, if you'll excuse me, I will collect the pieces, to be put into a [[Chris's room|dumpster]]. Have a good-<br />
<br />
[''The video cuts off in the middle of a word.'']<br />
<br />
== See also ==<br />
*[[PS3]]<br />
*[[Sony]]<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[The MovingForward videos]]|nextlink=[[Haters gonna hate.mov]]}}<br />
<br />
{{LeakedVideos}}<br />
{{Game Videos}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Video Games]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Haters_Gonna_Hate.MOV&diff=112471Haters Gonna Hate.MOV2010-09-06T17:13:36Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Haters gonna hate''' is a movie released on 6 [[September 2010]]. In it, a smug Chris dismisses the various rumors about his life, proclaims that the trolls will never control his life again, and says "Haters Gonna Hate". This video marks the return of the [[Medallions of Fail|Sonichu medallion]] after being missing for half the year.<br />
<br />
== Video ==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = ItIsFinished.MOV<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|N3KX-1o2WRU}}<br />
| stardate = 6 September 2010<br />
| subject = {{Rumors|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{OrangeShirt|text}}<br />
| previous = [[ItIsFinished.MOV]]<br />
| next = Current<br />
}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
[[image:PS3Alive.png|thumb|right|''I feel fantastic, and I'm still alive.'']]<br />
<br />
<br />
''*[[sigh]]*'' September...(counting under his breath) 4..5...sixth! two thousand ten. I am ''not'' dead. ''[dramatic glasses removal]'' I am very much alive, [[Chris and health|healthy and well]]. And I aims to keep it that way. So don't believe any damn rumors from the dang trolls, 'cause they always gotta be falsified. And I'll tell ya something else - [[Patti Chandler|Patti]] [[/cwc/|ain't dug up]]. She's still in the ground. All them trolls are doing between their forums and their lies and their dang rumors they spread is just blowing a bunch of ''smoke''. So, what do you '[[mumbles]'' believe a bunch of smoke? No. Because all there is is smoke is just a bunch of lies. So there. And also, I am going to ignore the trolls and they are not going to bother me anymore. I am regaining control of my life. They have played with me long enough and they're not going to play with me anymore. I'm not going to let them. Now, also I will say another thing ''[starts digging into his pocket, fishing out some sort of string.]'' Haters. ''[Twirls string]'' Gonna hate. Pew. ''[Throws it, turns off camera]''</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Medallions&diff=112470Medallions2010-09-06T17:09:41Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Gone forever? */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:License.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Oh yes he fucking did]]<br />
[[Image:ickeriss_medallions.jpg|150px|thumb|Top to bottom: [[PS3|The Good]], [[Hex Bawx|the Bad]], [[Chris and art|the Ugly]]. Left to right: The decoy Sonichu medallion, the [[Jiggliami]] medallion, the Rosechu medallion, and the [[Blake]] medallion]]<br />
<br />
{{quote|Watch out for the medallion!|[[Niggo|Ludacris]]}}<br />
<br />
[[Christian Weston Chandler]] loves his original character [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] so much that he wears a hand-made '''Sonichu medallion''' on his neck. In public. The Sonichu medallion, along with his trademark [[Chris and fashion|Ernie shirt]], is perhaps his most famous characteristic. Over the years, Chris has produced numerous medallions of his [[electric hedgehog]] characters. He also calls them "medals".<br />
<br />
==Origins and purpose==<br />
<br />
[[Image:096-SonichuMedallion.jpg|150px|thumb|Like anything else Chris holds dear, it also comes in card form]]<br />
[[Image:0608-CWCIs22.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The earliest known photo of Chris with the medallion, from 24 Feb 2004, Chris's 22nd birthday. The medallion is in profile, with [[Wikipedia:Shrinky Dinks|Shrinky Dinks]] hanging from its chain]]<br />
<br />
Though Chris previously could not recall when he first made the Medallion, in [[August 2009]], Chris finally recalled the origins of the Medallion. From [[CWCipedia]]:<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu#Conception_and_Creation http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu#Conception_and_Creation]</ref><br />
<br />
{{quote|Then Late [[2000]], I bought some Crayola Model Magic Clay, and I molded and crafted the First Original Sonichu Medallion that I wore around my neck with a makeshift chain (which I later replaced with a better necklace I bought from [[Anna|Pacific Sunwear]] at my Mall). Sadly, the First Original was mistrusted with a [[Blanca Weiss|feindish[sic] individual]] in [[2008]], I recrafted the Medal and continued on (The Necklace Still Holds ALL the History of the Medallions). THERE IS CURRENTLY ONLY ONE Original, True Sonichu Medallion, and it is NOT MADE FROM [[CChanSonichuCWC|PAPER]] cheaply, NOT MANUFACTURED IN A FACTORY from Plastic or Metal (yet); IT IS MADE FROM CRAYOLA MODLE[sic] MAGIC CLAY, with my Permanent Ink Signature, Copyright Note, Circle of Originality, and Two Custom Shrinkie[sic]-Dink Charms of Sonichu and an S-Chu Ball. }}<br />
<br />
[[Image:Aragorn.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Throughout the ages, many have been tempted by the allure of the Medallion, with its power of giving its possessor delusions of grandeur, being Internet famous, and [[fail]] art skills, not to mention [[Anchuent Prophecy|the power]] to turn the user [[Wes-Li Sonichu|into]] [[Saramah Rosechu|a]] [[Chris-chan Sonichu|furry]]]]<br />
<br />
Despite being allegedly created in March 2000, the earliest known photograph of Chris wearing a Sonichu medallion is from his 22nd birthday, on 24 [[February 2004]]. In his [[So Need a Cute Girl]] video (20 December 2004) he feels it necessary to explain what it is, suggesting that it is still a relatively new feature. <br />
<br />
In a [[Mumble 6|Mumble chat]] on 10 [[February 2009]], Chris revealed the reason for the medallion and that is...because he wanted to. It's "like a nametag" for him. In one of his [[ED]] edits, Chris says that his medallion "identifies him for the [[autism|high-funcioning[sic] Autistic]] individual that he is".<ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=1997315096&oldid=1997314465 Chris ED edit, Revision as of 07:28, 10 November 2007</ref> And man, it sure does. It has also been speculated there could be other reasons for wearing his medallion, which range from simply thinking Sonichu is '''SERIOUS BUSINESS''', to being a portable anchor in our dangerous real world to [[Cwcville]], his own happy world where he's always the hero who saves the day.<br />
<br />
[[File:Soniccomicmedallion.png|thumb|Chris can't come up with any original ideas.]] One recent theory as to the origin of the medallion idea comes from the ''Sonic the Hedgehog'' comic series (Issue #70) in which a character is depicted wearing a Sonic medallion. This theory is supported by the fact the issue came out in February 1999, one year before Chris claims the Sonichu medallion was created.<br />
<br />
Each medallion is constructed from Crayola Model Magic, a non-toxic, easy-to-use modeling clay intended for small children. Chris wedges a keyring into the edge of each medallion, from which he can attach a chain to go around his neck. Sometimes he wears a Wilson wristband on top of it because, being autistic, he mostly likely has [[Wikipedia:Sensory_defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], which might render the sensation of the chain's links unbearable. Medallions are painted with acrylic paint in the color schemes of the characters they represent, with [[Chris and copyright|copyright information]] scrawled on the back. Additional detailing varies, but Chris is known to have applied Shrinky-Dink charms to certain medallions as a form of authentication, to prevent counterfeiting.<br />
<br />
==The Sonichu Medallion==<br />
<br />
[[Image:0712-CWCCollGrad3.jpg|150px|thumb|Chris even wore it at his god damn [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] graduation]]<br />
[[Image:FushionRedone.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Before Blanca, it was believed that the Medallion of Fail would corrupt its possessor, turning him into an autistic manchild with a poor taste in [[Chris and fashion|fashion]]]]<br />
<br />
Chris's primary medal is his Sonichu medallion, which he has rarely been seen without for the past five years. This medallion of course depicts his main character, Sonichu. Within the canon of Chris's [[Sonichu comics]], the medallion is the source of the [[anchuent powers]] that allow Chris to assume his electric hedgehog alter ego, [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]]. <br />
<br />
As he explained to [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] in his [[The Sonichu Chronicles|business proposal]], the medallion gives him no special powers in real life.<br />
<br />
In several videos, Chris says that in order for it to be a TRUE and HONEST video, it will be of him wearing the medallion. In this manner he attempted to cast doubt on the videos he posted confessing homosexuality, since he was not wearing his medallion in that footage.<br />
<br />
Since the discovery of Chris on [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], it had been understood among trolls that the Sonichu medallion was Chris's most cherished possession and that he would cry like a bitch if it were ever taken from him, making its capture a prime objective. This proved only partially true. Chris does not seem to have a special attachment to any one particular medallion, but merely his ability to always wear one at all times. Further, all successful efforts to eliminate the medallions have resulted in relatively little outrage; Chris is always more concerned with his internet girlfriends being fake than he is over losing his property because of them.<br />
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===Prototype===<br />
{{quote|He was also wearing a makeshift necklace that has a large plastic medallion in the shape of a Pokeman [sic] characters [sic] head. He also had a number of shrinky dink decorations attached to this necklace.|Psychiatrist describing the prototype Medallion of Fail, [[Autism papers]]<ref>[[Autism_papers#MENTAL_STATUS_EXAM:]]</ref>}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:094-SchuMedl.jpg|150px|thumb|Earliest known version of the medallion.]]<br />
[[Image:190-chumedal.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Computer rendering. This required over 9000 hours in MS Paint, as well as an associates degree in CAD/CAM.]]<br />
It appears that the very first medallion Chris created is the one seen to the right, which Chris was photographed wearing sporadically in 2004. This design is definitely cruder than the others, with a pale yellow hue suggesting Chris was still learning how to properly apply color in this medium. This version is always seen on a metal chain, accompanied by Shrinky Dinks of a "CWC" logo, Sonichu, Rosechu, and the [[Chaotic Combo]].<br />
<br />
Chris wore this medallion as late as May 2004, when he brought it with him to the Anime Mid-Atlantic convention that year. He would also wear this medallion later in the year, when he received a [[Autism papers#Intake Survey|psychiatric survey]].<br />
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<br />
===Mark 1 (and decoy)===<br />
[[Image:Chrischan_sonichu_medal.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Spoiler: he even wears it during his sex fantasies]]<br />
[[Image:Decoy medallion.JPG|thumb|150px|The decoy medallion]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:SpecialSymbols.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The SPECIAL SYMBOLS to identify the TRUE and HONEST medallion.]]<br />
[[Image:Terrifying by neodalion.jpg|150px|thumb|Chris's supposed reaction to the destruction of his medallion (artist's depiction).]]<br />
<br />
By [[June 2005]] Chris had begun to wear a new medallion with a better paint job. This one can be identified by the tufts of fur on the sides of Sonichu's face, which are less pronounced than in the prototype and later models. There are no Shrinky Dinks to go with it, and instead of a chain it hangs from some sort of beaded necklace. The appearance of this version in pictures and videos seems to correspond with the introduction of Chris's red-and-blue striped shirts. This may be the medallion he was wearing in the [[So Need a Cute Girl|20 Dec 2004 video]]. It is definitely the medallion he wore to the 2005 Anime Mid-Atlantic convention.<br />
<br />
No one is sure how many medallions Chris wore between 2005 and [[2008]], but in all pictures they appear roughly the same as this design. Sonichu's face has eyebrows in some photos and not in others, so either Chris was repainting the same medallion or making new ones. 4chan and ED are filled with high-functioning autistics who have pored over photographs identifying subtle differences in the medal's "ears" and "cheeks," without arriving at a consensus. For the sake of clarity, this article will assume that this was Chris's only medallion during this period.<br />
<br />
In [[August 2008]] an anon on /v/ offered a story and photograph suggesting that he had met Chris in real life and tricked him into giving the medallion to him. However, Anon aspies all immediately analyzed the details of dozens of pictures and determined the "stolen" medallion to be a forgery. This conclusion was reaffirmed when Chris himself decided to post [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|a video]] announcing that the medallion had never been stolen, defiantly claiming that nobody would take it from him. He further denied it in the [[Christian Weston Chandler Interview]].<br />
<br />
Chris claimed to have made multiple Sonichu medallions and that he would sometimes wear these decoys to frustrate attempts to steal the one true medallion. It would remain unclear whether he was bluffing until October 2008 when the team of trolls posing as [[Blanca Weiss]] tricked him into sending all of his medallions to them. The package they received contained no fewer than ''two'' yellow Sonichu medals: one with the special markings identifying it as the "real" one, and another with no markings. It may be assumed that these were the only two medallions he owned at that time. Neither of them was the prototype, however, and its fate is unclear.<br />
<br />
A video that showed the destruction of the medallion was eventually uploaded to YouTube. Chris responded by [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|crashing into slumber]]. Its remains are currently locked in a box somewhere at Miskatonic University. As for the decoy Sonichu medallion, it ultimately ended up in the possession of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]'s owner/webmaster, Girlvynl.<br />
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===Mark 2===<br />
[[Image:ChrisMomsPanties.jpg|150px|thumb|It identifies him for the high-functioning autistic individual that he is]]<br />
<br />
After sending the medallions to Blanca, and being told by Blanca that trolls had stolen them from "her," Chris created a new Sonichu medallion with a slightly larger design. He posted [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|a video]] [[lie|explaining]] that Blanca had recovered the original one and sent it back to him, and that he had modified it. This new medallion boasted a special peg on the reverse side which could be used to hold Chris's [[high school ring]], which somehow made it copy-protected.<br />
<br />
Assuming Chris did not create any backup medallions, this is the same one he wore while posing in his mother's underwear at the request of trolls posing as Blanca. During this same exchange he later [[semen|ejaculated]] onto the medal. Shortly thereafter Chris posted [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 21st, 2008|a new video]] in which he is visibly not wearing the medallion. It's unclear if he replaced this soiled medallion or if he cleaned it; in either case he was wearing it (or a similar duplicate) again by 27 October.<br />
<br />
On 3 March 2009 [[Max]] coerced Chris into cutting his medallion into pieces and shoving those pieces up his rectum. The idea of Chris literally inserting these chunks of ceramic into his rectum (and therefore risking anal tearing and sepsis) was highly controversial. Some have argued that he merely placed them between his buttcheeks (either in an attempt to deceive Max or out of ignorance of how to get them past his sphincter), but in any case, the remnants of the medallion were assuredly covered in [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|fecal matter]]. Whatever happened, Chris thinks that his father would "have another heart attack" if he knew the details.<br />
<br />
===Mark 3===<br />
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|150px|thumb|Oh God, the taste...]]<br />
[[Image:New sonichu medallion.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The first formal appearance of the Mark 3 medallion. It's like ''the Blair Witch Project,'' but only a few seconds long and the entire budget (and then some) spent on the crap on the background]]<br />
<br />
Although Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|claimed]] that he was making a new medallion, he didn't wear any medal in his [[YouTube]] videos between the 3 March 2009 incident and his 1 July 2009 videos. During this period he argued that his high school ring may be accepted as a symbol of his truthiness. However, since this statement was made without the medallion, this was false and Chris disproved himself.<br />
<br />
In photos released 17 April 2009 of Chris in some [[butt garments]], the new medallion, Mark 3, is shown as Chris licks it in a sensuous fashion. The release of these images proved doubly hurtful for Chris, not only for showing him, a shell of a manchild, in diapers but even worse in that it confirmed that there is a new Medallion that can either be seized and/or shoved up his rectum.<br />
<br />
Despite the fact that he had made a new medallion, Chris was for some time reluctant to wear it in his videos, allegedly out of the fear that trolls would start a new campaign to seize the medallion and/or shove it up his rectum. <br />
<br />
On [[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009|22 May 2009]] this medallion made a surprise cameo in Christian's newest video. During the update, the video randomly cuts to the medallion hanging from the ceiling, only to cut back to Chris seconds afterward, presumably to add extra validity to the statements made in Chris's video.<br />
<br />
The [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009|1 July 2009]] videos mark the full return of the Medallion of Fail, as Chris wears the third medallion around his neck throughout both videos.<br />
<br />
CWC enthusiasts can look forward to Chris voluntarily surrendering the medallion to thieves and/or willingly shoving it up his rectum in the near future.<br />
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==The Rosechu Medallion==<br />
[[Image:Medallion Rosechu.jpg|150px|thumb|left|A gift for his beloved sister-wife]]<br />
[[Image:Rosechu medallion.JPG|150px|thumb|Close-up]]<br />
<br />
Only one medallion of Sonichu's [[sweetheart]] [[Rosechu]] is known to have existed, but it is speculated to be the first one Chris fashioned after the Sonichu one. The Rosechu medallion was intended to be worn by Chris's future [[heartsweet]], the one who would be his true love and bear him his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|God-called daughter]]. Chris has never been seen wearing it himself. It was sent with the others to Blanca in October 2008. It currently resides with the founder of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]].<br />
<br />
The medallion was first known to the internet in the pages of [[Sonichu 4]], where Chris's [[Crystal Weston Chandler (character)|imaginary twin sister Crystal]] was introduced wearing it. In the comics Crystal possesses the same anchuent powers as Chris and the Rosechu medallion therefore allows her to become Crystalina Rosechu. That a real Rosechu medal existed was not learned until later, when Chris revealed it to [[PandaHalo]].<br />
<br />
In case it hadn't occurred to you yet: Chris did, in real life, make a medal to be awarded to the future mother of his children, and in his fantasy world he has affixed this same medal to the twin sister he created to explore what he would be like if he'd been born female. Freud would doubtlessly have some choice words to say about this.<br />
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==The Black Sonichu Medallion==<br />
[[Image:Blachu Medallion.JPG|150px|thumb|left|He's too angry to show his [[fangs]]]]<br />
[[Image:Black sonichu.JPG|150px|thumb|Close-up]]<br />
<br />
Although Black Sonichu (now [[Blake]]) seems to have originally served as an analogue for [[Wes Iseli]],<ref>As seen in [[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]] - [[:File:433-CWCSNHP9.jpg]]</ref> Chris appears to use the Black Sonichu medallion to represent his own dark side. The picture at the left speaks volumes about its significance; Chris seems to believe that if he scowls hard enough and wears the evil medallion, then whoever he's angry with will be terrified into capitulation, such as when he wore it in a video aimed at [[Adam Stackhouse]].<br />
<br />
The [[Anchuent Prophecy]] in the comics foretells that the Black Sonichu medallion would be created as a dark reflection of the original, yellow Sonichu medallion Chris wears. Beginning with [[Sonichu 6]], [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]] began wearing the dark medal and acting as Christian's evil twin, following the urges Chris himself keeps bottled up inside him. Like Christian, Naitsirhc summons powers from his medallion to become Reldnahc Ha-Taque.<br />
<br />
Naitsirhc's medallion notwithstanding, Black Sonichu's role as the symbol of pure evil has softened in recent years as Chris has allowed the character to soften and fall in love with [[Bubbles Rosechu]]. As such the actual Black Sonichu medallion was rarely seen until it was sent to Blanca in October 2008.<br />
{{Clear}}<br />
<br />
==The Jiggliami Medallion==<br />
[[Image:Jiggliamimedallion.jpg|150px|thumb|On the back, it reads "Medallion crafted by Christian Weston Chandler."]]<br />
<br />
Despite the purpose of the Rosechu medallion, Chris was so in love with Blanca that he created a brand-new medallion for her to wear based on Blanca's original character [[Jiggliami]]. This medallion was sent along with the others to Blanca in October 2008. Blanca was depicted wearing this medallion in [[Sonichu 7]] and [[Sonichu 8|8]]. It is currently locked away in a Government warehouse somewhere in California.<br />
<br />
It is the simplest of the medallions, being a plain circle with no three-dimensional pieces. Consequently, it's probably the least hideous of the medallions, as Chris has limited the number of ways he can fail by giving himself less work to do.<br />
<br />
==The [[Asperchu]] Medallion (A.K.A. The Medallion of Win?)==<br />
[[Image:Asperchumedal.jpg|200px|thumb|left|The Medallion of Win in all its glory]] <br />
<br />
In [[Magical Man Potion|one video]], Chris's mysterious friend is seen sporting an odd medallion. In [[02 March 2010|another video]] a few days later, the medallion is confirmed to be one of Asperchu. Apparently, it was crafted by Alec Benson Leary and given to Chris as a symbol of goodwill. In that video, Chris is pained to have the medallion around and have it hung up on his wall.<br />
<br />
==Gone forever?==<br />
As can be seen in his recent videos in [[2010]], Chris is no longer wearing his medallions. The last time the medallion was seen was when he said he was leaving the internet for the second time. Also gone are the clown shirts. Disposing of these elements may be Christian attempting to be perceived as a normal person. The medallion made a return on September 6th, as Chris is seen wearing it once again in [[Haters gonna hate.mov]]. All is right with the world again.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Amnyfest Ring]], which Chris claims as the source of his power after losing his medallions. Still resides with Chris for the time being.<br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
{{Relics of Fail}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]<br />
[[Category:Things Chris has had Sex with]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Medallions&diff=112468Medallions2010-09-06T17:06:59Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:License.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Oh yes he fucking did]]<br />
[[Image:ickeriss_medallions.jpg|150px|thumb|Top to bottom: [[PS3|The Good]], [[Hex Bawx|the Bad]], [[Chris and art|the Ugly]]. Left to right: The decoy Sonichu medallion, the [[Jiggliami]] medallion, the Rosechu medallion, and the [[Blake]] medallion]]<br />
<br />
{{quote|Watch out for the medallion!|[[Niggo|Ludacris]]}}<br />
<br />
[[Christian Weston Chandler]] loves his original character [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] so much that he wears a hand-made '''Sonichu medallion''' on his neck. In public. The Sonichu medallion, along with his trademark [[Chris and fashion|Ernie shirt]], is perhaps his most famous characteristic. Over the years, Chris has produced numerous medallions of his [[electric hedgehog]] characters. He also calls them "medals".<br />
<br />
==Origins and purpose==<br />
<br />
[[Image:096-SonichuMedallion.jpg|150px|thumb|Like anything else Chris holds dear, it also comes in card form]]<br />
[[Image:0608-CWCIs22.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The earliest known photo of Chris with the medallion, from 24 Feb 2004, Chris's 22nd birthday. The medallion is in profile, with [[Wikipedia:Shrinky Dinks|Shrinky Dinks]] hanging from its chain]]<br />
<br />
Though Chris previously could not recall when he first made the Medallion, in [[August 2009]], Chris finally recalled the origins of the Medallion. From [[CWCipedia]]:<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu#Conception_and_Creation http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu#Conception_and_Creation]</ref><br />
<br />
{{quote|Then Late [[2000]], I bought some Crayola Model Magic Clay, and I molded and crafted the First Original Sonichu Medallion that I wore around my neck with a makeshift chain (which I later replaced with a better necklace I bought from [[Anna|Pacific Sunwear]] at my Mall). Sadly, the First Original was mistrusted with a [[Blanca Weiss|feindish[sic] individual]] in [[2008]], I recrafted the Medal and continued on (The Necklace Still Holds ALL the History of the Medallions). THERE IS CURRENTLY ONLY ONE Original, True Sonichu Medallion, and it is NOT MADE FROM [[CChanSonichuCWC|PAPER]] cheaply, NOT MANUFACTURED IN A FACTORY from Plastic or Metal (yet); IT IS MADE FROM CRAYOLA MODLE[sic] MAGIC CLAY, with my Permanent Ink Signature, Copyright Note, Circle of Originality, and Two Custom Shrinkie[sic]-Dink Charms of Sonichu and an S-Chu Ball. }}<br />
<br />
[[Image:Aragorn.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Throughout the ages, many have been tempted by the allure of the Medallion, with its power of giving its possessor delusions of grandeur, being Internet famous, and [[fail]] art skills, not to mention [[Anchuent Prophecy|the power]] to turn the user [[Wes-Li Sonichu|into]] [[Saramah Rosechu|a]] [[Chris-chan Sonichu|furry]]]]<br />
<br />
Despite being allegedly created in March 2000, the earliest known photograph of Chris wearing a Sonichu medallion is from his 22nd birthday, on 24 [[February 2004]]. In his [[So Need a Cute Girl]] video (20 December 2004) he feels it necessary to explain what it is, suggesting that it is still a relatively new feature. <br />
<br />
In a [[Mumble 6|Mumble chat]] on 10 [[February 2009]], Chris revealed the reason for the medallion and that is...because he wanted to. It's "like a nametag" for him. In one of his [[ED]] edits, Chris says that his medallion "identifies him for the [[autism|high-funcioning[sic] Autistic]] individual that he is".<ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=1997315096&oldid=1997314465 Chris ED edit, Revision as of 07:28, 10 November 2007</ref> And man, it sure does. It has also been speculated there could be other reasons for wearing his medallion, which range from simply thinking Sonichu is '''SERIOUS BUSINESS''', to being a portable anchor in our dangerous real world to [[Cwcville]], his own happy world where he's always the hero who saves the day.<br />
<br />
[[File:Soniccomicmedallion.png|thumb|Chris can't come up with any original ideas.]] One recent theory as to the origin of the medallion idea comes from the ''Sonic the Hedgehog'' comic series (Issue #70) in which a character is depicted wearing a Sonic medallion. This theory is supported by the fact the issue came out in February 1999, one year before Chris claims the Sonichu medallion was created.<br />
<br />
Each medallion is constructed from Crayola Model Magic, a non-toxic, easy-to-use modeling clay intended for small children. Chris wedges a keyring into the edge of each medallion, from which he can attach a chain to go around his neck. Sometimes he wears a Wilson wristband on top of it because, being autistic, he mostly likely has [[Wikipedia:Sensory_defensiveness|sensory defensiveness]], which might render the sensation of the chain's links unbearable. Medallions are painted with acrylic paint in the color schemes of the characters they represent, with [[Chris and copyright|copyright information]] scrawled on the back. Additional detailing varies, but Chris is known to have applied Shrinky-Dink charms to certain medallions as a form of authentication, to prevent counterfeiting.<br />
<br />
==The Sonichu Medallion==<br />
<br />
[[Image:0712-CWCCollGrad3.jpg|150px|thumb|Chris even wore it at his god damn [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] graduation]]<br />
[[Image:FushionRedone.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Before Blanca, it was believed that the Medallion of Fail would corrupt its possessor, turning him into an autistic manchild with a poor taste in [[Chris and fashion|fashion]]]]<br />
<br />
Chris's primary medal is his Sonichu medallion, which he has rarely been seen without for the past five years. This medallion of course depicts his main character, Sonichu. Within the canon of Chris's [[Sonichu comics]], the medallion is the source of the [[anchuent powers]] that allow Chris to assume his electric hedgehog alter ego, [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]]. <br />
<br />
As he explained to [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] in his [[The Sonichu Chronicles|business proposal]], the medallion gives him no special powers in real life.<br />
<br />
In several videos, Chris says that in order for it to be a TRUE and HONEST video, it will be of him wearing the medallion. In this manner he attempted to cast doubt on the videos he posted confessing homosexuality, since he was not wearing his medallion in that footage.<br />
<br />
Since the discovery of Chris on [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], it had been understood among trolls that the Sonichu medallion was Chris's most cherished possession and that he would cry like a bitch if it were ever taken from him, making its capture a prime objective. This proved only partially true. Chris does not seem to have a special attachment to any one particular medallion, but merely his ability to always wear one at all times. Further, all successful efforts to eliminate the medallions have resulted in relatively little outrage; Chris is always more concerned with his internet girlfriends being fake than he is over losing his property because of them.<br />
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===Prototype===<br />
{{quote|He was also wearing a makeshift necklace that has a large plastic medallion in the shape of a Pokeman [sic] characters [sic] head. He also had a number of shrinky dink decorations attached to this necklace.|Psychiatrist describing the prototype Medallion of Fail, [[Autism papers]]<ref>[[Autism_papers#MENTAL_STATUS_EXAM:]]</ref>}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:094-SchuMedl.jpg|150px|thumb|Earliest known version of the medallion.]]<br />
[[Image:190-chumedal.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Computer rendering. This required over 9000 hours in MS Paint, as well as an associates degree in CAD/CAM.]]<br />
It appears that the very first medallion Chris created is the one seen to the right, which Chris was photographed wearing sporadically in 2004. This design is definitely cruder than the others, with a pale yellow hue suggesting Chris was still learning how to properly apply color in this medium. This version is always seen on a metal chain, accompanied by Shrinky Dinks of a "CWC" logo, Sonichu, Rosechu, and the [[Chaotic Combo]].<br />
<br />
Chris wore this medallion as late as May 2004, when he brought it with him to the Anime Mid-Atlantic convention that year. He would also wear this medallion later in the year, when he received a [[Autism papers#Intake Survey|psychiatric survey]].<br />
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<br />
===Mark 1 (and decoy)===<br />
[[Image:Chrischan_sonichu_medal.jpg|150px|thumb|left|Spoiler: he even wears it during his sex fantasies]]<br />
[[Image:Decoy medallion.JPG|thumb|150px|The decoy medallion]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:SpecialSymbols.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The SPECIAL SYMBOLS to identify the TRUE and HONEST medallion.]]<br />
[[Image:Terrifying by neodalion.jpg|150px|thumb|Chris's supposed reaction to the destruction of his medallion (artist's depiction).]]<br />
<br />
By [[June 2005]] Chris had begun to wear a new medallion with a better paint job. This one can be identified by the tufts of fur on the sides of Sonichu's face, which are less pronounced than in the prototype and later models. There are no Shrinky Dinks to go with it, and instead of a chain it hangs from some sort of beaded necklace. The appearance of this version in pictures and videos seems to correspond with the introduction of Chris's red-and-blue striped shirts. This may be the medallion he was wearing in the [[So Need a Cute Girl|20 Dec 2004 video]]. It is definitely the medallion he wore to the 2005 Anime Mid-Atlantic convention.<br />
<br />
No one is sure how many medallions Chris wore between 2005 and [[2008]], but in all pictures they appear roughly the same as this design. Sonichu's face has eyebrows in some photos and not in others, so either Chris was repainting the same medallion or making new ones. 4chan and ED are filled with high-functioning autistics who have pored over photographs identifying subtle differences in the medal's "ears" and "cheeks," without arriving at a consensus. For the sake of clarity, this article will assume that this was Chris's only medallion during this period.<br />
<br />
In [[August 2008]] an anon on /v/ offered a story and photograph suggesting that he had met Chris in real life and tricked him into giving the medallion to him. However, Anon aspies all immediately analyzed the details of dozens of pictures and determined the "stolen" medallion to be a forgery. This conclusion was reaffirmed when Chris himself decided to post [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008|a video]] announcing that the medallion had never been stolen, defiantly claiming that nobody would take it from him. He further denied it in the [[Christian Weston Chandler Interview]].<br />
<br />
Chris claimed to have made multiple Sonichu medallions and that he would sometimes wear these decoys to frustrate attempts to steal the one true medallion. It would remain unclear whether he was bluffing until October 2008 when the team of trolls posing as [[Blanca Weiss]] tricked him into sending all of his medallions to them. The package they received contained no fewer than ''two'' yellow Sonichu medals: one with the special markings identifying it as the "real" one, and another with no markings. It may be assumed that these were the only two medallions he owned at that time. Neither of them was the prototype, however, and its fate is unclear.<br />
<br />
A video that showed the destruction of the medallion was eventually uploaded to YouTube. Chris responded by [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|crashing into slumber]]. Its remains are currently locked in a box somewhere at Miskatonic University. As for the decoy Sonichu medallion, it ultimately ended up in the possession of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]'s owner/webmaster, Girlvynl.<br />
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<center>{{#ev:youtube|O-TP2wCucZo}}</center><br />
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===Mark 2===<br />
[[Image:ChrisMomsPanties.jpg|150px|thumb|It identifies him for the high-functioning autistic individual that he is]]<br />
<br />
After sending the medallions to Blanca, and being told by Blanca that trolls had stolen them from "her," Chris created a new Sonichu medallion with a slightly larger design. He posted [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|a video]] [[lie|explaining]] that Blanca had recovered the original one and sent it back to him, and that he had modified it. This new medallion boasted a special peg on the reverse side which could be used to hold Chris's [[high school ring]], which somehow made it copy-protected.<br />
<br />
Assuming Chris did not create any backup medallions, this is the same one he wore while posing in his mother's underwear at the request of trolls posing as Blanca. During this same exchange he later [[semen|ejaculated]] onto the medal. Shortly thereafter Chris posted [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 21st, 2008|a new video]] in which he is visibly not wearing the medallion. It's unclear if he replaced this soiled medallion or if he cleaned it; in either case he was wearing it (or a similar duplicate) again by 27 October.<br />
<br />
On 3 March 2009 [[Max]] coerced Chris into cutting his medallion into pieces and shoving those pieces up his rectum. The idea of Chris literally inserting these chunks of ceramic into his rectum (and therefore risking anal tearing and sepsis) was highly controversial. Some have argued that he merely placed them between his buttcheeks (either in an attempt to deceive Max or out of ignorance of how to get them past his sphincter), but in any case, the remnants of the medallion were assuredly covered in [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|fecal matter]]. Whatever happened, Chris thinks that his father would "have another heart attack" if he knew the details.<br />
<br />
===Mark 3===<br />
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|150px|thumb|Oh God, the taste...]]<br />
[[Image:New sonichu medallion.jpg|150px|thumb|left|The first formal appearance of the Mark 3 medallion. It's like ''the Blair Witch Project,'' but only a few seconds long and the entire budget (and then some) spent on the crap on the background]]<br />
<br />
Although Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009|claimed]] that he was making a new medallion, he didn't wear any medal in his [[YouTube]] videos between the 3 March 2009 incident and his 1 July 2009 videos. During this period he argued that his high school ring may be accepted as a symbol of his truthiness. However, since this statement was made without the medallion, this was false and Chris disproved himself.<br />
<br />
In photos released 17 April 2009 of Chris in some [[butt garments]], the new medallion, Mark 3, is shown as Chris licks it in a sensuous fashion. The release of these images proved doubly hurtful for Chris, not only for showing him, a shell of a manchild, in diapers but even worse in that it confirmed that there is a new Medallion that can either be seized and/or shoved up his rectum.<br />
<br />
Despite the fact that he had made a new medallion, Chris was for some time reluctant to wear it in his videos, allegedly out of the fear that trolls would start a new campaign to seize the medallion and/or shove it up his rectum. <br />
<br />
On [[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009|22 May 2009]] this medallion made a surprise cameo in Christian's newest video. During the update, the video randomly cuts to the medallion hanging from the ceiling, only to cut back to Chris seconds afterward, presumably to add extra validity to the statements made in Chris's video.<br />
<br />
The [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009|1 July 2009]] videos mark the full return of the Medallion of Fail, as Chris wears the third medallion around his neck throughout both videos.<br />
<br />
CWC enthusiasts can look forward to Chris voluntarily surrendering the medallion to thieves and/or willingly shoving it up his rectum in the near future.<br />
<br />
<br clear="all"><br />
<br />
==The Rosechu Medallion==<br />
[[Image:Medallion Rosechu.jpg|150px|thumb|left|A gift for his beloved sister-wife]]<br />
[[Image:Rosechu medallion.JPG|150px|thumb|Close-up]]<br />
<br />
Only one medallion of Sonichu's [[sweetheart]] [[Rosechu]] is known to have existed, but it is speculated to be the first one Chris fashioned after the Sonichu one. The Rosechu medallion was intended to be worn by Chris's future [[heartsweet]], the one who would be his true love and bear him his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|God-called daughter]]. Chris has never been seen wearing it himself. It was sent with the others to Blanca in October 2008. It currently resides with the founder of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]].<br />
<br />
The medallion was first known to the internet in the pages of [[Sonichu 4]], where Chris's [[Crystal Weston Chandler (character)|imaginary twin sister Crystal]] was introduced wearing it. In the comics Crystal possesses the same anchuent powers as Chris and the Rosechu medallion therefore allows her to become Crystalina Rosechu. That a real Rosechu medal existed was not learned until later, when Chris revealed it to [[PandaHalo]].<br />
<br />
In case it hadn't occurred to you yet: Chris did, in real life, make a medal to be awarded to the future mother of his children, and in his fantasy world he has affixed this same medal to the twin sister he created to explore what he would be like if he'd been born female. Freud would doubtlessly have some choice words to say about this.<br />
<br />
<br clear="all"><br />
<br />
==The Black Sonichu Medallion==<br />
[[Image:Blachu Medallion.JPG|150px|thumb|left|He's too angry to show his [[fangs]]]]<br />
[[Image:Black sonichu.JPG|150px|thumb|Close-up]]<br />
<br />
Although Black Sonichu (now [[Blake]]) seems to have originally served as an analogue for [[Wes Iseli]],<ref>As seen in [[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]] - [[:File:433-CWCSNHP9.jpg]]</ref> Chris appears to use the Black Sonichu medallion to represent his own dark side. The picture at the left speaks volumes about its significance; Chris seems to believe that if he scowls hard enough and wears the evil medallion, then whoever he's angry with will be terrified into capitulation, such as when he wore it in a video aimed at [[Adam Stackhouse]].<br />
<br />
The [[Anchuent Prophecy]] in the comics foretells that the Black Sonichu medallion would be created as a dark reflection of the original, yellow Sonichu medallion Chris wears. Beginning with [[Sonichu 6]], [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]] began wearing the dark medal and acting as Christian's evil twin, following the urges Chris himself keeps bottled up inside him. Like Christian, Naitsirhc summons powers from his medallion to become Reldnahc Ha-Taque.<br />
<br />
Naitsirhc's medallion notwithstanding, Black Sonichu's role as the symbol of pure evil has softened in recent years as Chris has allowed the character to soften and fall in love with [[Bubbles Rosechu]]. As such the actual Black Sonichu medallion was rarely seen until it was sent to Blanca in October 2008.<br />
{{Clear}}<br />
<br />
==The Jiggliami Medallion==<br />
[[Image:Jiggliamimedallion.jpg|150px|thumb|On the back, it reads "Medallion crafted by Christian Weston Chandler."]]<br />
<br />
Despite the purpose of the Rosechu medallion, Chris was so in love with Blanca that he created a brand-new medallion for her to wear based on Blanca's original character [[Jiggliami]]. This medallion was sent along with the others to Blanca in October 2008. Blanca was depicted wearing this medallion in [[Sonichu 7]] and [[Sonichu 8|8]]. It is currently locked away in a Government warehouse somewhere in California.<br />
<br />
It is the simplest of the medallions, being a plain circle with no three-dimensional pieces. Consequently, it's probably the least hideous of the medallions, as Chris has limited the number of ways he can fail by giving himself less work to do.<br />
<br />
==The [[Asperchu]] Medallion (A.K.A. The Medallion of Win?)==<br />
[[Image:Asperchumedal.jpg|200px|thumb|left|The Medallion of Win in all its glory]] <br />
<br />
In [[Magical Man Potion|one video]], Chris's mysterious friend is seen sporting an odd medallion. In [[02 March 2010|another video]] a few days later, the medallion is confirmed to be one of Asperchu. Apparently, it was crafted by Alec Benson Leary and given to Chris as a symbol of goodwill. In that video, Chris is pained to have the medallion around and have it hung up on his wall.<br />
<br />
==Gone forever?==<br />
As can be seen in his recent videos in [[2010]], Chris is no longer wearing his medallions. The last time the medallion was seen was when he said he was leaving the internet for the second time. Also gone are the clown shirts. Disposing of these elements may be Christian attempting to be perceived as a normal person. The medallion, however, made a return on September 6th, as Chris is seen wearing it once again in [[Haters Gonna Hate.MOV]]. All is right with the world again.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Amnyfest Ring]], which Chris claims as the source of his power after losing his medallions. Still resides with Chris for the time being.<br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
{{Relics of Fail}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]<br />
[[Category:Things Chris has had Sex with]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=MySpace&diff=111468MySpace2010-08-31T11:34:37Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:090-CWComicalHug.jpg|thumb|Chris's top friend on MySpace was "Chris's Future Sweetheart." Yes, he created a placeholder account for his top friend]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:ComicMyspace.jpg|thumb|Chris's accurate depiction of his MySpace - his only friend is [[Sonichu]]]]<br />
<br />
[[Chris]] created '''MySpace''' pages to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s in his [[2003]]–[[2004]] battle against [[Mary Lee Walsh]].<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#Enter the Wicked Witch of the Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]</ref> One of his accounts got hacked by the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] in the events of 11 [[September 2008]] ([[9/11|NEVER FORGET]]). <br />
<br />
[[Image:myspacehacked.jpg|thumb||Chris's MySpace after the hacking]]<br />
<br />
On 19 [[May 2009]], [[Clyde Cash]] discovered three text files on Chris's site. One file is a list of Chris's MySpace friends, whom he classified as [[JERKS]] (males), [[tobacky|smokers]], [[alcohol|drunks]], "more to love" (fatties), etc. The other two files are [[MySpace messages|correspondences with young ladies on MySpace]] who lived near Chris in [[2005]]. The list is presented verbatim with added links and minor adjustments for formatting.<br />
<br />
==Chandler's List==<br />
<br />
SonichuCWC's MySpace Friends (Mostly Female, unless noted as "JERK;" MEN, other than myself are JERKS)<br />
<br>Currently 70 Friends ("()" around profile description means "Marked as Favorite(s)")<br />
<br />
{| class="wikitable sortable"<br />
|-<br />
!align="left"|Name<br />
!align="left"|Location<br />
!align="left"|Age<br />
!align="left"|Note<br />
|-<br />
| asa || Arlington, Alabama || 25 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| \/\/hitney || Quinque, Virginia || 18<br />
|-<br />
| Howard || Charlottesville, Virginia || 31 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| TheBestKeptSecretYouHad || Louisa Co., Virginia || 19 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| ~*Tracy*~ || Columbus, Ohio || 25<br />
|-<br />
| Kristen || Charlottesville, Virginia || 22<br />
|-<br />
| Mac || Charlottesville, Virginia || 19<br />
|-<br />
| Sarah || Richmond, Virginia || 20 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| ...Them chickens is ash and I'm lotion (Akalei <3) || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| Kim || Charlottesville, Virginia || 24<br />
|-<br />
| Lauren...SING U 2 SLEEP || Chesapeake, Virginia || 21 || "More to Love"<br />
|-<br />
| _Da/\/ieL || Roswell, New Mexico || 17 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| Samantha || Orange, Virginia || 19<br />
|-<br />
| UVA nurse (Hayley) || Raleigh, North Carolina || 22<br />
|-<br />
| Escaping Ellsworth || South Chicago Suburbia, Illinois || ?? || JERK Band<br />
|-<br />
| Shelly || McGaheysville, Virginia || 18<br />
|-<br />
| Heather || Burbank & New Orleans, California || 35 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| *~KISS~* || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21<br />
|-<br />
| Jessie Jo || Charlottesville, Virginia || 24 || Smoker<br />
|-<br />
| I lOVe yOu <3 iS thAt okAy || Charlottesville, Virginia || 18<br />
|-<br />
| Nasty G || Richboro, Pennsylvania || ?? || JERK Band<br />
|-<br />
| Kristie || Charlottesville, Virginia || 19<br />
|-<br />
| (**LiNnEa** || Charlottesville, Virginia || 19 || Taken)<br />
|-<br />
| Ashley || Charlottesville, virginia || 19<br />
|-<br />
| Amanda || Orange, Virginia || 20<br />
|-<br />
| Erika || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21<br />
|-<br />
| (Lindsay || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20)<br />
|-<br />
| sasa || Short Pump, Virginia || 21 || Smoker<br />
|-<br />
| (Jelena || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20 || No Interest)<br />
|-<br />
| Jade || Tampa, Florida || 17<br />
|-<br />
| Leah || Los Angeles, California || ??<br />
|-<br />
| Brooke || Crozet, Vriginia || 19 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| Cate || Charlottesville, Virginia || 22 || Lesbian<br />
|-<br />
| (Ella || Charlottesville, Virginia || 19 || No Interest)<br />
|-<br />
| Randi || Charlottesville, Virginia || 17 || Mormon<br />
|-<br />
| Chad || Charlottesville, Virginia || 23 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| Rachel || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20<br />
|-<br />
| JaMee || Floyds Knobs, Indiana || 18 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| ([[Anna McLerran|Green Day=Orgy (Anna)]] || Salt Lake City, Utah || 20 || Mormon)<br />
|-<br />
| Beth || Charlottesville, Virginia || 19<br />
|-<br />
| (Timothy James || Salt Lake City, Utah || 17 || JERK)<br />
|-<br />
| *JUDY* aka the girlie || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| Courtney Jaye || Atlanta, Georgia || 2?<br />
|-<br />
| Jessica || Charlottesville, Virginia || 19<br />
|-<br />
| Maureen || Radford, Virginia || 21<br />
|-<br />
| JesseBacKwards || Tri-Valley, California || ?? || JERK Band<br />
|-<br />
| lori || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21<br />
|-<br />
| Aimee || Ruckersville, Virginia || 25 || Smoking Parent<br />
|-<br />
| (~*FreeStyle*~ || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21 || JERK)<br />
|-<br />
| Jessika || Charlottesville, Virginia || 19 || No Intrest<br />
|-<br />
| Nora-Chan (*MIZZ NORA*) || Fort Wayne, Indiana || 21 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| Mary || Barboursville, Alabama || 16<br />
|-<br />
| sandy || Northern Cambria, Pennsylvania || 24<br />
|-<br />
| I <3 ROCKSTARS (Becca) || Crozet, Virginia || 18<br />
|-<br />
| Liz || Charlottesville, Virginia || 24<br />
|-<br />
| Wild || Spokane, Alabama || 24<br />
|-<br />
| (Britney Spears || Beverly Hills, California || 23 || Taken)<br />
|-<br />
| organized C h A o S || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20<br />
|-<br />
| Sara || Oshkosh, Wisconsin || 19<br />
|-<br />
| love...lost...heart (Melanie) || Ruckersville, Virginia || 19<br />
|-<br />
| zack || Warren, Michigan || 16 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| Pimpasaurus Sex || Yavin IV, Alabama || 22 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| JustJen || Palm Springs, California || 23 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| veronica || Baltimore, Maryland || 19 || Smoker<br />
|-<br />
| Ashley of Course || Charlottesville, Virginia || 18<br />
|-<br />
| Jeremy || Waynerboro, Virginia || 26 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| (Chris || Ruckersville, Virginia || 23 || Self)<br />
|-<br />
| adam || Albany, New York || 18 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| Crystal || ???, Nevada || 18<br />
|-<br />
| Karen || New York, New York || 24<br />
|-<br />
|}<br />
<br />
Chris's MySpace Friends: (Mostly Female, unless noted as "JERK;" MEN, other than myself are JERKS)<br />
<br>**cwcson@gmail.com gmail.com pass: sonichu myspace.com pass: sonichu3<br />
<br>Currently 54 Friends ''[Note: the reason Chris adds "8" to some listings is unknown]''<br />
<br />
{| class="wikitable sortable"<br />
|-<br />
!align="left"|Name<br />
!align="left"|Location<br />
!align="left"|Age<br />
!align="left"|Note<br />
|-<br />
| Julia || San Diego, California || 26 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| asa || Arlington, Alabama || 25 || JERK || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Emma Rocks! || Charlottesville, Virginia || 23 || Smoker<br />
|-<br />
| Howard || Charlottesville, Virginia || 31 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| Meredith || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21 || Smoker<br />
|-<br />
| *New Addiction* || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20<br />
|-<br />
| Simpleng Tao (Howie) || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21 || "More to Love"<br />
|-<br />
| ~*Tracy*~ || Columbus, Ohio || 25 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Kristen || Charlottesville, Virginia || 22 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| *Molly || Charlottesville, Virginia || 16 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| katie || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20<br />
|-<br />
| Kim || Charlottesville, Virginia || 24 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Lauren...SING U 2 SLEEP || Chesapeake, Virginia || 21 || "More to Love" || 8<br />
|-<br />
| _Da/\/ieL || Roswell, New Mexico || 17 || JERK || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Escaping Ellsworth || South Chicago Suburbia, Illinois || ?? || JERK Band || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Heather || Burbank & New Orleans, California || 35 || Taken || 8<br />
|-<br />
| *~KISS~* || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Jessie Jo || Charlottesville, Virginia || 24 || Smoker || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Nasty G || Richboro, Pennsylvania || ?? || JERK Band || 8<br />
|-<br />
| **LiNnEa** || Charlottesville, Virginia || 19 || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| Ashleigh || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21<br />
|-<br />
| Amanda || Orange, Virginia || 20 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Erika || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Lindsay || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Jennifer || Charlottesville, Virginia || 24<br />
|-<br />
| sasa || Short Pump, Virginia || 21 || Smoker || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Jade || Tampa, Florida || 17 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Leah || Los Angeles, California || ?? || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Cate || Charlottesville, Virginia || 22 || Lesbian || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Laura || Charlottesville, Virginia || 22<br />
|-<br />
| sarah p. || Charlottesville, Virginia || 22<br />
|-<br />
| Randi || Charlottesville, Virginia || 17 || Mormon || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Chad || Charlottesville, Virginia || 23 || JERK || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Green Day=Orgy (Anna) || Salt Lake City, Utah || 20<br />
|-<br />
| Maureen || Radford, Virginia || 21 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| JesseBacKwards || Tri-Valley, California || ?? || JERK Band || 8<br />
|-<br />
| lori || Charlottesville, Virginia || 21 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Aimee || Ruckersville, Virginia || 25 || Smoking Parent || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Mary || Barboursville, Alabama || 16 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| I <3 ROCKSTARS (Becca) || Crozet, Virginia || 18<br />
|-<br />
| Liz || Charlottesville, Virginia || 24 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| SonichuCWC || Ruckersville, Virginia || 23 || Self<br />
|-<br />
| organized C h A o S || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20<br />
|-<br />
| Sara || Oshkosh, Wisconsin || 19 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| zack || Warren, Michigan || 16 || JERK || 8<br />
|-<br />
| anglhallz (Holly) || Charlottesville, Virginia || 20<br />
|-<br />
| Pimpasaurus Sex || Yavin IV, Alabama || 22 || JERK || 8<br />
|-<br />
| JustJen || Palm Springs, California || 23 || Taken || 8<br />
|-<br />
| AMY || Houston, Texas || ?? || Taken<br />
|-<br />
| Ashley of Course || Charlottesville, Virginia || 18 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Jeremy || Waynerboro, Virginia || 26 || JERK<br />
|-<br />
| adam || Albany, New York || 18 || JERK || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Crystal || ???, Nevada || 18 || 8<br />
|-<br />
| Karen || New York, New York || 24 || 8<br />
|}<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<gallery><br />
Image:AfricanAmericansAsEqualsMySpace.jpg<br />
Image:IwouldntfeelcomfortableMySpace.jpg<br />
</gallery><br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[MySpace messages]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://www.myspace.com/sonichu Chris-chan's myspace of fail]<br />
<br />
{{The Internet}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Websites]]<br />
[[Category:Chris's websites]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Common_Questions&diff=108751Common Questions2010-08-13T12:33:11Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* 07 January 2010 */</p>
<hr />
<div>In late [[December 2009]] the [[CWCipedia]] [[Mailbag|Mailbags]] gained a new subsection, a series of short questions allegedly asked by many people who had written to Chris. Chris was surprisingly diligent about answering all of these '''Common Questions''' (normal people would call them "Frequently Asked Questions", or "FAQ") with every new mailbag. The answers, unsurprisingly, were erratic at best. Sometimes Chris provided far too much information, and other times he would provide a single word in response when a longer answer would have been expected. On occasion, he would change the text in the question itself to suit his needs, a practice of editing he'd been using in the mailbags since day one.<br />
<br />
All of his answers have been compiled here, arranged by the date on which he answered them.<br />
<br />
==28 December 2009==<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Have you ever read any books on how to go about creating [[art]]? E.G. Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain, The Elements of Style, How to Draw Comics the Marvel Way, On Writing, or things like internet tutorials?'''<br />
::A: [[My Half of A Whole New World for Kacey|I have read such books]], and I have taken many arts classes too.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you were a director [[A CWC Audition|in Hollywood]], what kinds of films would you make?'''<br />
::A: Action/Steamy ([[Chris and English|Striaght]]) Romance <br />
<br />
*'''Q: You said you read [[R.L. Stine]] books when you were in high school. What kind of books do you read now? "Literary" fiction? Genre, like mystery or horror or science fiction? Nonfiction?'''<br />
::A: I read less books now, although the last book I read was Pamela Anderson's Star.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Have you considered creating non-[[Sonichu]] comics or stories?'''<br />
::A: Yes, and the ideas are still in my head.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Have you ever accepted and used constructive criticism in your comics? Or do you blow off anything anyone says that is slightly negative, even if their intentions are to help you improve your art?'''<br />
::A: I have accepted and used ideas and criticism one such example was the [[Sonichu Fan Promo|Sonichu Animations from YouTube User: Timmys1984]]; it was very good, yet the lines were wrong originally. At least I have set that record straight in my [[Sonichu 9|9th Book]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you steal jokes from so many other sources (i.e. [[Family Guy]] and [[Excel Saga]]) and put it in your comics? It isn't very original and you can't come up with an original concept if all the humor in your comics is stolen.'''<br />
::A: Like Family Guy, Simpsons, Excel Saga, and even [[South Park]], taking jokes is of acceptable practice; it works when the author is short on original jokes, and wants to fill in a good one. Everybody does it. "Simpsons Did It."<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Describe your artistic process. How do you get inspiration for ideas for your comics? What goes through your head when you draw and color your comics?'''<br />
::A: I get the idea beforehand in random thought/imagination/dream, get pen and paper and write/draw it out. A lot goes through my head, and it is hard for me as a [[Chris and his Ego|creative genius]] to remember it all on-the-spot verbatim.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: We all know you have [[autism]], but exactly what type do you have? There are multiple types on the spectrum.'''<br />
::A: High-Functioning Autism.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What do you plan to do after you have found your true [[sweetheart]] and had your daughter [[Crystal]]?'''<br />
::A: I will live my family life as I had dreamed and waited for hapily.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What would you do if either of you turned out to be infertile?'''<br />
::A: That is just plain stupid; I am VERY Fertile; Certified in the Medical Clinic, and I would make sure my woman has not hit Menopause yet.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What would you do if you found your sweetheart, fell in love with her, married her, but she could only give birth to male children?.'''<br />
::A: It is a 50/50 chance among all women; I trust God to come through in his promise as he has told me before. I will keep trying though; I am not King Henry VIII.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Aside from creating Sonichu and [[Rosechu]] and excluding your future accomplishment of getting a true sweetheart and having your daughter Crystal, what is your greatest accomplishment in life and why?'''<br />
::A: Graduating High School and College; I have learned a LOT and met the requirements; it's all good.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What are your top five priorities in life and why?'''<br />
::A: 1) Good [[Health]] - Who wants to be ill or sick? 2) Happiness - I don't like being sad. 3) [[Love]] - I want to feel loved and appreciated by my closest ones. 4) Projects/Job - It gives me something to do. 5) [[Money]] - It does not make the world go around, but everyone wants it to feel like they are getting something out of a deal.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you were made the absolute leader of the entire world for a day and your word was taken as law, what sorts of things would you do to make the world a better place?'''<br />
::A: [[Chris and reality|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples]], leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All [[gays]] would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What about fucking [[sex toys|sex dolls]], [[masturbating]], drawing smut? Isn't this all forbidden for true Christians?'''<br />
::A: It is not forbidden; that would be the Jews who are against those things, and I am not Jewish, and I respect them as [[Michael Snyder | individual people.]]<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Contrary to what you stated in issue 8, the age of consent in most of the United States is BELOW 18 (17 or 16). What is your opinion on this?'''<br />
::A: I understand that SOME states have that law, and I feel that it is good; [[Pedofork|it broadens the range by one or two years, so one would feel lest restricted]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What would you say is the most romantic thing you have ever done with or to a woman?'''<br />
::A: [[Creepy_stare|Sensual, emotionally-linked eye-contact]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: We've been hearing about your creations becoming more and more popular amongst the gay community. What are your thoughts on this?'''<br />
::A: Firstly, their perspectives of my work are flawed; they misunderstand some points, and I do not care for that at all; It is a STRAIGHT Comic; [[Homos]]exuality Lifestyle is HEAVILY DISCOURAGED and DETESTED. Second, I really feel hatred in them placing MY characters in their events WRONGFULLY, even in... [[It's UGH!|UGH!!!]]... pride parades and essays promoting their lifestyle. All of My Sonichus and Rosechus Are Straight! And I Am Straight! DO NOT SAY OTHERWISE, Because It is Mislabeling; it is Very Wrong, and I DO NOT APPRECIATE IT AT ALL.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you plan to give an ending to Sonichu's story?'''<br />
::A: [[Chris and reality|No]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do Sonichu and Rosechu have full names (that is, two-part names, like all other [[Sonichus]] and [[Rosechus]])? If so, what are they?'''<br />
::A: No, they are the very first Sonichu and Rosechu, so they do not have such names.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Will Eevails, or possibly some other Tails-like creature, appear in your comic?'''<br />
::A: No.<br />
<br />
==31 December 2009==<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What do you think about people harassing others over PlayStation home?'''<br />
::A: I do not like it at all.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What are the 5 worst movies you have ever <s>seen</s> heard of and would never ever watch in your entire life?'''<br />
::A: [[Homos|Brokeback Mountain, Borat, Bruno, Crying Game, Krull]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What are the 5 worst TV shows you have ever <s>seen</s> heard of and would never ever watch in your entire life?'''<br />
::A: I am unsure.<br />
<br />
''Note: Chris added the strikeouts himself.''<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What are the 5 worst video games you have ever played?'''<br />
::A: I am unsure.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What are the 5 best movies you have ever seen?'''<br />
::A: [[Mary Poppins]], All Transformers Movies, Both Ghostbuster Movies, All Saw Movies, The [[Christian Weston Chandler|40-Year Old Virgin]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What are the 5 best TV shows you have ever seen?'''<br />
::A: Transformers (ALL Seasons and Sets), Sonic the Hedgehog (All Shows), Pok'emon (All Seasons), Mythbusters, Filmation's Ghostbusters (Little Care for "The Real Ghostbusters"; Jake, Eddie and Tracy WERE THE ORIGINAL REAL GHOSTBUSTERS).<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What are the 5 best video games you have ever played?'''<br />
::A: All [[Sonic|Sonic the Hedgehog Titles]], [[LittleBiGPlanet]] (PS3 AND PSP), All Guitar Hero Titles, All Animal Crossing Titles, All Pok'emon Titles.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Have you read classic comics like: A Contract With God, Maus, Watchmen, or The Sandman?'''<br />
::A: Superman, Spider-Man and the like.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Could you mention any specific titles or series of comics you have read (besides Sonic the Hedgehog)?'''<br />
::A: Superman, Spider-Man and the like.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What's your creative process like?''' <br />
::A: Random, Extensive, Tough to Comprehend sometimes...<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How do you go about creating each comic--do you do storyboards or scriptwriting beforehand?'''<br />
::A: Mental Storyboards and Scriptwriting, but I do write some of it out on paper.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How far in advance do you plan the story?'''<br />
::A: About weeks to months in advance. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Besides Sonic, Pokemon, and your daily struggles, what inspires your writing and art?'''<br />
::A: [[Things Chris has ripped off|Other shows, comics, video games]], and most importantly my [[Evan|Fans]]. :) <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Did any specific comic book inspire you to create your own?'''<br />
::A: I'd say the Sonic the Hedgehog Comic Book Series<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why comics as opposed to short stories/novels?'''<br />
::A: I enjoy drawing, and I feel better with having pictures to associate the words with. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Would you ever consider getting a massage?'''<br />
::A: Yes, from Women Only. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: What is your purpose in life?'''<br />
::A: Does anyone really know their own ONE TRUE purpose in life? We mostly are supposed to live one moment and day at a time as best we can to make us individually feel satisfied and at peace. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you believe in an afterlife?'''<br />
::A: [[Chris and Religion#Afterlife|Yes]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What do you think happens after we die?'''<br />
::A: Like most people; our souls leave our bodies, we end up in Heaven or Hell depending on our deeds/misdeeds, and [[Chris and Religion|possibly Reincarnation]].<br />
<br />
==01 January 2010==<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Where do you think you'll go after you die and why do you think that will be the case?'''<br />
::A: I do my best and what I can to end up in Heaven, I do a lot of good deeds. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: You follow the Bible rigorously and believe homosexuality will send you to Hell. However, the Bible says that having unmarried sex will send you to Hell as well. Explain your reasonings you choose to ignore God's word and not waiting until after marriage but instead "after the 3rd date".'''<br />
::A:Those more strict rules apply to the Jewish, especially the book of Leviticus. I am a Christian Methodist, and as long as we feel comfortable and happy with our lives, if the Christian individual feels comfortable with [[Chris and sex|premarital sex]], then it is cool. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Can you justify your anti-homosexuality? How exactly?'''<br />
::A: Yes; the Homos I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why does Rosechu wear clothes while Sonichu does not? Additionally, why are Lolisa, DJ Jamsta, and Rosechu the only Sonichus and Rosechus who wear clothing?'''<br />
::A: Well, Why does Cindy [[Bear]] not wear clothes? Why does Mickey Mouse wear pants yet Sonic and Donald Duck do not? Why does Daisy Duck wear ONLY a Top, yet Minnie Mouse wears a skirt? IT'S A CARTOON; WHO CARES?! <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Are the Sonichu comics still aimed at children? If so, what age group?'''<br />
::A: Yes, [[pedofork|Ages 7 and Up]]. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: I am really interested in your Lego CWCville, could you please draw an elaborate map of it for me?'''<br />
::A: One Day, I will draw a map, although it is similar to the City of Cwcville, VA.<br />
<br />
==05 January 2010==<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If Sonichu got published how much would each Issue cost?'''<br />
::A: I'd estimate $2.25, given the current shelf-comic prices. But ON the [[PS3|Playstation Network]]'s Digital Comic Service, I'd estimate $0.99 or $1.99 per Digital Issue.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How often does Sonichu have to stop and take breaks when he's running?'''<br />
::A: He only stops for a rescue, [[China|social life]], [[Obesity|eating a chili dog, tacos or whatever he feels like chowin' down]], and to relax at home with his family.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Virginia lets you to marry your first cousin, but doesn't allow gays to marry. Do you think cousin-marriage is better than gay marriage? Why or why not?'''<br />
::A: WHAT THE F***?! WHERE DID YOU HEAR THAT C***PIEST OF HEINOUS LIES ABOUT VIRGINIA?! Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN [[Barbara|MOTHER]] OR [[Bob|FATHER]]! In comparison, both unholy marriages are equally terrible.<br />
<br />
==07 January 2010==<br />
<br />
*'''Q: You said that you confess your sins and pray every night. What sins do you confess?'''<br />
::A: To name a couple: I apologize right after each time I say something like "God damn" (I'm sorry, God); I confess and apologize for, if any that day, angry responses to my own father after he starts an arguement or gets on my nerves. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: What exactly happened when you were called into Mary Lee Walsh's office?'''<br />
::A: That was one time I would rather not go into or recall. She raised her voice at me in harsh tones about how "You won't be getting any women" or "Your methods are flawed and stupid" and even "You are Stupid, Christian". I responded very angrily and verbally abused her back. Then I was kicked out for a year with Anger Management and Psychiatrist assistance.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you randomly capitalize words when you type?'''<br />
::A: I do not type in [[Chris and hypocrisy|Caps at Random]]; I type those phrases or words in caps to EMPHASIZE MY POINT OR FACT.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: When did you first realize that you hated the homos? Do your parents hate them as much as you do?'''<br />
::A: I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, 2003 just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE! And I will say this again, '''SONICHU IS STRAIGHT, YOU DUMBASS GAYWADS.'''<br />
<br />
==09 January 2010==<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What do you think of people of different faiths other than your own (this includes Satanism,Atheism, Agnosticism)'''<br />
::A: For most other religions, I am of neutral opinion and have no objections to them whatsoever. But for ALL those of Satanism and Atheism; I do not care for those Non-Religions AT ALL. I will not discriminate the people of those Non-Religions as Individual People.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How do you feel about the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual community? do they deserve the same rights as anyone else?'''<br />
::A: As individual people, they all deserve Most Rights, but GAY MARRIAGE Should be made Illegal ALL Countries; Marriage is ONLY for Straight Man/Woman couples. I stand behind that most fully.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How do you feel about people of different political parties, political parties spanning from Anarchism to Fascism.'''<br />
::A: As a Moderate (of Middle, Neutral Opinion), I have nothing against the other political parties. Mainly, because even though I do have the ability to learn about them, I know not ALL of the details of them.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How do you feel about Drugs? Drugs such as Marijuana, Cocaine, Cigarettes, Alcohol, etc.'''<br />
::A: I STAND FULLY AGAINST [[Tobacky|Cigarettes, Marijuana, Cocaine, Cigars]] and ALL other Drugs of the sort. The only exceptions are drugs that are Prescribed to the Individual Person, as long as they are not given to anyone they were not originally prescribed to, I have no objections. And Alcohol; in Responsible, Moderate amounts, it can be good for you, yet I do not support Too Much of it, as if left unchecked, irresponsible or unassisted, too much can lead to fights that can lead to a trip to the hospital and automobile accidents.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you hold any distaste for any worldly culture?'''<br />
::A: Only those who fully promote smoking or such drugs that I have just elaborated against of.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Are you uncomfortable about people of Color? do you have any tensions towards them?'''<br />
::A: I have no discomfort or tension against people of all colors. The only exception is in my choice of Sweetheart or Mate; No Personal Offense, but she can not be Black.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Are you disturbed or disgusted by different types of music? Many people dislike Death Metal: http://tinyurl.com/ch2yl5'''<br />
::A: I have agreement on some lyrics of Death Metal tracks, but the Tune, as long as it is not at loud volume, it is still good.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What do you think of our current president? Is he deceiving Americans as the Right Wing has expressed?'''<br />
::A: I think Obama is doing okay, yet I disagree with his Health Plan; it is premature at the time, because we can not afford it yet. The Right Wing are sour, mean people; I give no concern to them.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you think Countries such as the Soviet Union or [[CWCville|North Korea]] Are actually Communist?'''<br />
::A: I do not know much about those countries, so I can not give a full opinion on the topic. [[Lie|Although I do hate Communism]]; they are of wrong opinions and are considerably mean.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How do you think the situation in Afghanistan is going? Is there anything you would do different?'''<br />
::A: I do not have full knowledge of that situation either.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. Would you be willing to preform oral sex on a woman?'''<br />
::A: Yes I would.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. You often attempt to scare your trolls by stating they will go to hell. Some of your trolls do not believe in hell, what do you have to say to them?'''<br />
::A: Firstly, it is NOT a "scare tactic", IT IS FACT. And second, I say "Well, Believe it or not. You are Not Dead Yet."<br />
<br />
*'''Q. Have you ever thought about documenting your daily life? Kind of like a reality show?'''<br />
::A: The topic has come to mind, yet I do not feel it appropriate yet.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. Do you eat at restaurants other than McDonalds or Burger King?'''<br />
::A: Yes, namely Golden Corral, Country Cookin' and iHop.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. Do you ever consider playing Guitar Hero on expert instead of hard?'''<br />
::A: I have played on Expert, and it is good.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. What do you argue about with your dad?'''<br />
::A: A number of things; I would not know where to begin on making the list of dumb topics he comes up with.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. Why do you want to get the original Power Rangers back together? They're 40, no longer fit the costumes, one of them is dead, and one of them went to jail for drunk driving.'''<br />
::A: Originally, I meant ONLY to '''Revive Zordon'''; I mean PRESIDENTS, POLICE CHIEFS and such Recruiting Power Rangers and Creating Zords? Not only is it Trite and LAME, it is not as CLASSIC or Good Quality as Zordon.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. Do your parents freak out about you playing with girl's toys when you're a grown man?'''<br />
::A: No, they do not, and I gave that up long ago.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. What other ideas did you think of to attract women before you settled on a cardboard sign?'''<br />
::A: Newspaper/Magazine Ads, Online Dating Sites, Video Dating Services to name a few; THEY COST MONEY.<br />
<br />
*'''Q. What do you want to be when you grow up?'''<br />
::A: I am ALREADY GROWN UP; I am 27 Years Old, going on 28. I am a great artist, and I am looking forward to an Office Job.<br />
<br />
==15 January 2010==<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you could change the law, how would you change it? and you said you would outlaw the friend zone? why? what happened to a woman's right to choose who she wants to be with?'''<br />
::A: Nothing has happened in [[Women's Rights]]; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone [[Megan|the woman]] deeply cares about and trusts so she could get out of sex or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you like everything you see, so long as it doesn't have gay stuff in it?'''<br />
::A: Non-gay stuff is acceptable, but I don't like EVERYTHING I SEE; there are some things, even straight things, that I don't like either.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you could upload your brain into a robot body, would you?''' <br />
::A: I do not think so.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why aren't you sure of the five worst games you've played? You can't have enjoyed [[List of Chris's games|every game you played]].'''<br />
::A: I just could not think of any that would total up to five.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you went back to college, what would you major in? What classes would you take?''' <br />
::A: I am not sure.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you like the name "[[Reginald]]" so much?'''<br />
::A: Because [[PandaHalo|a woman]] who was close to me picked it out for the son in our role-play scenario; now she's [[Chris and death|dead]], and I still miss her sometimes.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Did you know that nearly all male porn actors start out making gay porn? What do you think of this?''' <br />
::A: Whatever; I do not care.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: [[Christian Love Day|Why did you get rid of asexuality in Sonichu 10]]? Hasn't it occurred to you that some people just don't like being in romantic relationships, and are much happier single? '''<br />
::A: It had occured to me about asexuality recently from a mailbag question, and made me think about it, and NOT being able to FEEL the Attraction is Just Sad.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: In a recent chat, you said that if you had a chance, you would want to make being a homo illegal. Yet, in a video contemporary to the chat, you ask your fans not to leave you. How would you feel if all of your [[Gay4Sonichu|gay fans]] left you?''' <br />
::A: I would not want them to leave; they are still fans.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Have you ever considered getting your own apartment? What prevents you from doing so? '''<br />
::A: Yes I have considered it. [[Chris and money|Current financial situations]] and fear of change (a common Autistic Trait) prevents me from doing so.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If there were no women, and men could reproduce sexually with other men, would homosexuality still be wrong?''' <br />
::A: ONLY if that was the case, I would say Shoot Me.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do so many of your videos have a greenish-yellow tinge?''' <br />
::A: It's one of the flaws in recording with Sony's EyeCreate Program (a downloadable Playstation 3 Application that requires the [[PSEye|Playstation Eye Camera]]); THEY NEED TO FIX THE PROGRAM, not only of that tint from Lack Of Some Light, but the Audio/Video skips that seems to occur during recording.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: You hate homos, but you also hate straight men for "taking all the pretty girls leaving none for you." Shouldn't you support homos, so that other men can date each other and free up girls for you?''' <br />
::A: NO, because Homosexuality is STILL WRONG.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Sex isn't that big of a deal. It's fun, but you don't have to have sex to be happy. Why are you so big about sex?''' <br />
::A: Oh, I don't know, how about being a [[Virgin with rage|Frustrated Virgin]]?!<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Would life be better if we reproduced nonsexually, and thus didn't have a sex drive?''' <br />
::A: That is Bull[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|c***]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Since you haven't been very specific about your taste in women, who are your favorite porn stars?''' <br />
::A: To name a few: Jenna Jameson, Daisy Marie and Carmen Luvana.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you have any friends in the Autistic community?''' <br />
::A: Only a few Acquaintances.<br />
<br />
==20 January 2010==<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Have you ever considered the possibility that you may never lose your virginity? What will you do then? How old do you think is too old to be a virgin?'''<br />
::A: No. The next question is Non-Applicable. 40.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you could have sex with one famous woman, living or historical, who would it be?'''<br />
::A: [[Britney Spears]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you think [[Asperchu]] currently has 10 times as many fans as Sonichu?'''<br />
::A: "Fans" are fickle, and so are "Fads"; the Non-True Fans will always look for the Next "Fad" until they tire of it and move on to the next "Fad". In this note, I would say that I am Possibly Retro, and [[Chris and Fashion|Retro is ALWAYS IN]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Would you say your life has improved since thinking up Sonichu? Why or why not?'''<br />
::A: [[Chris and his ego|Yes; I became famous,]] and becoming famous is not an easy task.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you know what the word "hypocrite" means?'''<br />
::A: "hypocrite"; an adjective; 1) to be of a belief while not upholding that belief. 2) a total liar. 3) an UNTRUE Fan. example: When the Sonichu Fan left Sonichu for a [[Asperchu|newer, yet badly drawn, thing]], after having said that they would always enjoy Sonichu forever, is a '''hypocrite''' among the Truest and Loyalest Sonichu Fans.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: I noticed that you have a Marge Simpson poster on your wall. Do you find her sexually appealing and if yes why?'''<br />
::A: That is the pin-up from a "Playboy" a few months ago. She is appealing, yes, but I am more attracted to the real-life women around us all.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What's with all the pictures of Rosechu with a pickle on the internet? I thought she was supposed to be ALL WOMAN?'''<br />
::A: Rosechu IS All Woman; she transformed from a Female Raichu; those people are just being stupid jerks with such "renditions".<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How do you expect to keep us last remaining fans by stop working on the comic pages?'''<br />
::A: I am drawing pages every day; just be patient and have full faith, unless you want to be considered a '''hypocrite''' among True, Loyal Sonichu and Rosechu Fans.<br />
<br />
==26 January 2010==<br />
*'''Q: If Rosechu is a Raichu, that means she's more evolved then Sonichu, who is a Pikachu. Shouldn't she be more powerful than Sonichu and be the leader?'''<br />
::A: Evolution makes no difference; Rosechu is equally as powerful as Sonichu; Sonichu is the main character; Rosechu has equal leadership roles, so she leads when appropriate. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you think you are better artist than Alec, aside from low-resolution and his style's blockiness? Is there something wrong to have quirky and blocky drawing style?'''<br />
::A: How about the fact that his style looks Retarded and something that [[Chris and hypocrisy|a 2-Year Old can do]]? There's nothing wrong, unless you want to be TRULY Respected as an Avid Artist and Serious Person. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why is [[Flame the Sunbird]] a ripoff of Kazooie?'''<br />
::A: Flame was NEVER taken from Kazooie; if anything, he is MORE similar to Knuckles, but with a Sunbird Form. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: You have expressed disdain for Asperchu and Simonchu, but how do you feel about Moon-Pals? Have you read it? If not, it would only be fair for you to do so.'''<br />
::A: I have read Moon-Pals, and I feel that it is more like Moon-Dorks the way Sean draws and Portrays their Events so Grotesquely. <br />
<br />
*'''Q: How many fans do you think you have? Please specify one of the following options: 0-10, 11-100, 101-1000, 1001-10000, 10000+.''' <br />
::A: [[Ego|1000000000+.]] <br />
<br />
*'''Q: How many fans do you think Asperchu has? Please specify one of the following options: 0-10, 11-100, 101-1000, 1001-10000, 10000+.'''<br />
::A: 0-10<br />
''Chris left this last question unanswered until 30 January.''<br />
<br />
==30 January 2010==<br />
*'''Q: Will you ever be able to accept criticism without being condescending or changing the subject?''' <br />
::A: Yes.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Capital punishment (the Death Penalty) is legal in the Commonwealth of Virginia. Do you support the death penalty?'''<br />
::A: [[9 February 2010|I do not support the death penalty]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Could you post the letter you sent to Barack Obama on the CWCipedia?''' <br />
::A: I am afraid I did not make a photocopy of the letter, and I had snail-mailed it weeks ago, so I can not do that.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: You talk about how Asperchu is just a fad, but what if Sonichu is actually the fad that's starting to fade?'''<br />
::A: I disagree.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If Rosechu is equal to Sonichu in power why does she need to be saved by him?''' <br />
::A: She was caught off-guard at those times.<br />
<br />
==1 February 2010==<br />
*'''Q: Why do people who "[[Mailbag 49#Apparently that's reason enough|tick you off]]" [[Mailbag 49#Chris loves his country|deserve to die in explosions]]? Didn't Matthew say to love thy enemy?'''<br />
::A: I never said that phrase, nor meant it in any way.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you don't support the death penalty, that means you believe all life is sacred, right? Then why do you call for the deaths of gays? Is it only straight people who shouldn't get the death penalty?'''<br />
::A: [[Death threats|All Life IS sacred]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How come you become more and more like a dictator like Kim Jong Il, Hugo Chavez, or Vladimir Putin with your mailbags?'''<br />
::A: I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE Mislabeling than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why did you choose to show the first black character in the series in a negative and racist light?'''<br />
::A: That one is NOT a recurring character; the one who WILL be recurring characters are and will be like [[Jerkop|Police Officers]] like Louis Perez.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why did Ultra Sonichu cure Aspergers, but did nothing for the physically challenged Rosechus in CWCville?'''<br />
::A: Mental Problems can be cured Easier than Physical.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you constantly edit the letters you receive? Don't you think it is insulting and rude?'''<br />
::A: I am working on that, and Editing Less.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you like zombies? What weapon would you use to defend yourself in the zombie apocalypse? Where would you hold out?'''<br />
::A: No, I do not like zombies. I would use a [[Megatron pistol|Gun]]. [[14 Branchland Court|Where I can]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you claim to respect your fans, why is it okay for you to "promise" to do a Sonichu page everyday, and then not keep up on that promise?'''<br />
::A: I am [[Chris and art|drawing the pages For Real]]; Hand-to-God. I have other life problems that delay me from getting them scanned and online sooner; Shoveling Snow, Chores, Earlier Bedtime and Routine Resituating.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why don't you just draw Wild a new girlfriend, so you can remove Simonla like Evan asked you to? Most people have more than one relationship in their lives, so it should not be that much of a problem. Or a you so uncreative that you can not think of a new character?''' <br />
::A: I have stated before that when ONE finds [[Boyfriend-free girl|their Match]], they KEEP Each Other; I am NOT going to separate the Couple.<br />
<br />
==22 February 2010==<br />
*'''Q: How come your comics art hasn't improved since 2005, do you think you've reached your limit when it's come to the art of the Sonichu comic?'''<br />
::A: On the contrary, my [[Chris and art|drawing skills]] have improved greatly over the years, yet it may be subtle and not obvious.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you have a bedtime when you are around 30 years old?'''<br />
::A: Everybody needs to sleep a while to recover energy from the past day.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What do you think of legally blind people?'''<br />
::A: They're okay; they are keen to their other senses, and that is admirable. I have neutral to positive opinions of the legally blind.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Hey, Chris, what were your favorite after-school activities when you were a kid?'''<br />
::A: Video games and Homework.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Were you ever involved in sports besides being the basketball towelboy, or did you take music lessons or art classes outside of school?'''<br />
::A: I took a lot of Physical Education classes; I did not take classes outside of school before college.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you can't get your car out because of the snow, shouldn't now be the perfect time to work on updating your comic?'''<br />
::A: I have been working on the comic the whole time, as you will see very soon.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What's your favorite food? Does your mom ever cook at home? If she asked you to fix dinner, what would you do?'''<br />
::A: Macaroni and Cheese; Yes; a small meal or soup.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Are there any video games out right now that you really want to play, but haven't gotten a chance to yet?'''<br />
::A: [[Fanmail Reading|The Orange Box]], [[God of War]] III and Heavy Rain.<br />
::''Note: neither God of War III nor [[Wikipedia:Heavy Rain|Heavy Rain]] had been released when Chris answered this question.''<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If you could change anything about yourself physically, what would you change and why?'''<br />
::A: Weigh myself down to 180 pounds.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How often do you shower?'''<br />
::A: [[Chris and health#Chris and hygiene|Nightly]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: How often do you visit with friends and family outside of the house?'''<br />
::A: Sometimes.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you enjoy [[20 December 2009|playing with your cats]]?'''<br />
::A: Yes.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you actually play with all the toys in your room? If not, why not donate some to children who actually will play with them?'''<br />
::A: I do sometimes play with all my toys.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you envy Sonichu for having a wife and kids?'''<br />
::A: No.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Which of the Rosechus is the sexiest in your opinion?'''<br />
::A: The Original Rosechu.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If shoveling snow is that hard for you, why don't you just pay some kid $10 to shovel your driveway?'''<br />
::A: Hard work is good for me.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: From between Issues #0 and #8 Which Electric Hedgehog pokemon do you like least and why?'''<br />
::A: Silvana Rosechu, because of the Troll Influences, I felt forced to let Graduon magically make her a hermaphrodite for the sake of "TRANSFORM".<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Have any of the Sonichus and Rosechus ever considered "swinging," aka swapping sex partners for the night?'''<br />
::A: No.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What are the ten worst things that have happened to you in your life?'''<br />
::A: 1) Trolls Pestering Me Constantly. 2) [[Julie|Learning that Ohio woman was actually a 13-year old boy]]. 3) Having my accounts hacked into. 4) Clyde Cash breaking into my ORIGINAL, which hosted The Original "CWC's Sonichu Site", Tripod Account and screwing it up Royally. 5) Being banned from The (Game & Hobby) Place by that S.O.B., '''[[Michael Snyder]]'''; we never saw eye-to-eye, and for [[Chris and anger|some UNCOMPREHENDIBLE Reason]], aside from that time with my Wii, He Hated Me, Period. 6) Learning of the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Website late October, 2007, followed by learning [[Lucas|TWO OF]] [[Mimms|THE TROLLS]] were old Pok'emon TCG comrades in that same League I used to go to HAD PART in the creation of that D*** E.D. Page. 7) The loss of two True and Good Women who I had friendships with, Sarah Cassandra McKenzie ([[PandaHalo]]), and [[Sarah Jackson]]. 8) Being banned from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] for a year. 9) Having to leave behind all of my [[Gal-pal|Girl Friends]] from High School after Graduation. 10) [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Being pinned down on the floor by a teacher, two teacher aides, the Guidance Counsoler and the Principal on the floor and having my screams and cries recorded onto audiocassete back in 4th Grade]]. [[Fail|11)]] The [[Autism]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Chris, what are the good deeds you have done that earn you the right to go to heaven?'''<br />
::A: I have done a lot of good in my life, yet I did some bad, [[Chris and remorse|most of which was accidental, unintentional or beyond my knowledge]]. To name a few good things: holding the door for many people in various places, [[Chris and Death#Mike Jackson (1969-2010)|honoring my promises]], [[Chris and anger|being friendly and kind in person]], [[Chris and money|donating to various causes and a lot of other good things]].<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why does homosexuality immediately condemn the person to hell regardless of how good they are?'''<br />
::A: I can not say; ask a Priest or Pastor.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: At what age did you officially become mayor of CWCville?'''<br />
::A: 18<br />
<br />
*'''Q: At what age will your future daughter inherit the title of mayor of CWCville?'''<br />
::A: 13 - 18<br />
<br />
*'''Q: You know that crystal isn't a kind of metal, right?'''<br />
::A: I know that; cyrstal is a kind of Mineral.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Who came up with the "Chris Chan" nickname?'''<br />
::A: I did; it's the first halves of my first and last names, Chris tian Chan dler, and it has a "Jackie Chan" feel to it.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What inspired you to create Sonichu?'''<br />
::A: The CD Cover Project for Computer Graphics during my [[Chris and english|Seinor]] Year at Manchester High; Sonic and Pikachu.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Even though you've created him for over a decade, did Sonichu ever helped you accomplished anything?'''<br />
::A: Yes; see myself as a better person.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why did the Wailord dropped a boulder on Bubble's adoptive mother Swampert?'''<br />
::A: the boulder was attached to that Wailord's underbelly, like Barnicles, and in its leap over Mama Swampert, the boulder detached itself.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Since you hate gay people so much, why do you use Rainbows in your comics?'''<br />
::A: I do not understand why the f*** the gays decided to use Rainbows as their symbol; that's like asking Hitler why he used the Swastika (which originally was a Lucky Symbol) for his whole mess.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What purpose have the Chaotic Combo served through out the whole comic?'''<br />
::A: It's like asking why Sailor Moon needed the Sailor Soldiers of the other 8 planets; BACKUP, ADVICE and COMRADESHIP.<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you add yourself as a character?'''<br />
::A: If it was good enough for Shinichi Watanabe in Excel Saga and Puni Puni Poemy, [[Chris and his Ego|it was good enough for me]]. But upon retrospect, I saw why it was a mistake.<br />
<br />
==Awaiting Answers==<br />
===From [[Mailbag 58]]===<br />
*'''Q: What do you think of people who read both Sonichu and Asperchu? Do you think they are loyal fans?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Have you considered letting more comic series onto the the CWCipedia?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Would you date someone who loved the Xbox as much as you love PS3 and hates PS3 as much as you do the Xbox?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: If only slow in the minds could be turned into jerkops, why didn't you get turned into one?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why do you refuse to buy your father nice gifts and just settle for cheap candy or even nothing?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: You say you're against the death penalty, so why is it that in your most recent comic pages you decided to kill off the Asperpedia crew?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Do you wish you could punish the Asperpals in real life the same way you did in your most recent comic book?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: Why are things a fact when said by you, but an opinion when said by others?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What has been your greatest victory over the trolls?<br />
<br />
*'''Q: What has been your biggest defeat at the hands of trolls?<br />
<br />
===From [[Mailbag 59]]===<br />
*'''Q:Why do you put Sonichu on your resume if you don't want it to be a job?<br />
<br />
{{Mailbag}}</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_OkCupid_Answers&diff=108493List of OkCupid Answers2010-08-11T19:16:48Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Misc. */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[OkCupid]] determines match rankings between its users by asking them a series of questions, and determining how they answer. These questions are randomly assigned, and can be answered whenever the user feels like it. The user can select a single answer for themselves, and multiple answers that he or she would be okay with potential matches picking.<br />
<br />
Due to the tireless efforts of [[Clyde Cash]] we have obtained archives of many of Chris's answers submitted for his latest OkCupid Profile. Chris's answer, and answers he would like potential mates to select. As is the norm with Chris, the answers vary from completely [[Honest]], to untrue things that [[ego|Chris genuinely believes]], to complete [[lies]] that he thinks girls want to hear. <br />
<br />
Chris's personal answers are <u>underlined</u>, and answers he would like girls to pick are in <font color="#009000">green</font>. There is considerable overlap between the two.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
==Politics and Law==<br />
'''In a relationship I like to discuss politics with my partner.'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">All the time!</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Sure. I'm interested in sharing our beliefs.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Sometimes. It depends.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Hardly. Politics are boring or personal.</font><br />
'''Which of the following is the more appropriate penalty for [[rape]]?'''<br />
* Death.<br />
* Castration.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Prison.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Community service or less.</font><br />
'''Which is more offensive: book burning or flag burning?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">book burning</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>flag burning</u></font><br />
'''Should burning your country's flag be illegal?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No</font><br />
'''Politically, which are more important to you right now?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Social issues</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Economic issues</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>I don't really care about politics</u></font><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
==Relationships==<br />
'''How important is it for you to make [[Megan|physical]] [[Kacey|contact]] when showing affection for someone?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Very important</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Somewhat important.</font><br />
* Not important.<br />
'''Would you strongly prefer to date someone of your own [[Chris and race|skin color / racial background]]?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No</font><br />
'''Most of all, I want to meet someone who deserves MY:'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">trust.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>loyalty.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">admiration.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">gratitude.</font><br />
'''If you inadvertently found a phone number in a partner's pocket, which would you do?'''<br />
* Call the number to see whose it is.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Openly ask what/who the number is for.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Nothing, I would trust my partner.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Nothing, my partner's privacy should be respected.</font><br />
'''If you were in a serious relationship and you learned that your partner cheated on you one drunken night, could you forgive him/her?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes, if he/she was sincerely sorry.</u></font><br />
* No, never.<br />
* <font color="#009000">It depends on the situation.</font><br />
* I don't believe in monogomy.<br />
'''If you were going to have a [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|child]], would you want the other parent to be of the same ethnicity as you?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>This would not be an important factor to me.</u></font><br />
'''If you were in a long term relationship and your partner [[Obesity|gained weight]] due to something like surgery recovery or childbirth, would you think less of them as a person?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">No, my partner's weight is irrelevant to me.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No, my partner's health is what is most important.</u></font><br />
* Not if they are willing to work hard and lose it.<br />
* Yes, weight gain is so unattractive.<br />
'''Would you ever stop dating someone based on a rumor you heard about them?'''<br />
* Yes.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Maybe, I'd give my date a chance to explain first.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No.</font><br />
'''What kind of fidelity (being faithful) is more important to you?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Physical/Sexual.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Mental/Emotional.</font><br />
* Neither is important.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Both are equally important.</u></font><br />
'''If you were in a serious relationship, would you mind if your significant other maintained an active profile on OkCupid?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes - I would mind this.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No - This would not bother me.</u></font><br />
'''Would you consider dating someone who dislikes children?'''<br />
* Yes.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No.</u></font><br />
'''Your significant other's ex is coming into town and he/she wants to go out to dinner with them alone. How do you react?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Sure, no problem.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Not thrilled, but go ahead.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Not just no... HELL no!</font><br />
'''If you were in a long-term monogamous relationship, would you consider your partner "open mouth" kissing someone else cheating?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">I'm Not Sure</font><br />
'''Would you consider having an open relationship, where you can see other people?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* No<br />
'''If one of your potential matches was overweight, would that be a dealbreaker?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes, even if they were slightly overweight.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes, but only if they were obese.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No, in fact I prefer overweight people.</font><br />
'''Would you avoid all contact with an ex if your current significant other asked you to?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes, of course!</u></font><br />
* No. This would be an unacceptable demand.<br />
* Only if their justification seems reasonable.<br />
'''Do you Google someone before a first date?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes. Knowledge is power!</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No. Why spoil the mystery?</u></font><br />
'''Would you--for any reason--read your mate's email or pose as him/her online, without his/her knowledge and permission?'''<br />
* Yes, they shouldn't be keeping secrets anyway.<br />
* Yes, I'd be too curious not to.<br />
* Only if I suspected them of something.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No, I'd trust them and that would be invasive.</u></font><br />
'''Your significant other is traveling and has the opportunity to stay with a good friend that you know they find to be very attractive. What's your stance on the situation?'''<br />
* It would be totally unacceptable.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>It might be ok, but I'd want to discuss it first.</u></font><br />
* It's fine - I don't see any problem.<br />
* It sounds sexy - Hopefully they'll hook up.<br />
'''You get married. Five years later, you realize it was a mistake. Discussion and counseling haven't made a difference. You just don't love your partner anymore. He/she still loves you. You decide to:'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u> Keep trying. Marriage means commitment.</u></font><br />
* Get a divorce. It'll be better for both of you.<br />
'''How willing are you to meet someone from OkCupid in person?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Totally willing!</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Hesitant, but would consider.</font><br />
* I am not interested in meeting in person.<br />
'''How much affection can you tolerate?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Inifinite</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Most of it.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">A little bit.</font><br />
* Get off me!!<br />
'''How important is it to you to have your own unique "thing" (like a weekly Girls' Night Out or Guys' Movie Night) that you don't share with your partner(s)?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Very - I need some ME time to be happy</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Sort of - I need friends outside of my partner</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Not much - I like sharing stuff with my partner</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">I'd prefer not to have exclusive things</font><br />
'''How long do you want your next relationship to last?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">One night</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">A few months to a year</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Several years</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>The rest of my life</u></font><br />
'''How do you feel about falling in love?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>I love it and want it very much</u></font><br />
* I try to avoid it<br />
* <font color="#009000">I like to just let it happen</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">I'm indifferent / not sure</font><br />
'''Would you consider connecting with someone whose relationship status is [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|'seeing someone' or 'married']]?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes to both</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No to both</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes to 'seeing someone' only</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes to 'married' only</font><br />
'''Which makes for a better relationship?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Passion</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Dedication</font><br />
'''Is it a requirement that you communicate with your significant other daily, in some way (phone, email, in person, etc.)?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes, no matter what</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes, unless otherwise specified</u></font><br />
* No, it's not necessary<br />
* No, I'd prefer not to communicate daily<br />
'''Which of these options most closely describes what you're looking for in your next relationship?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Someone to come home to</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Someone to go out with</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Someone for tonight</font><br />
'''How much can intelligence turn you on?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Intelligence can turn me on a lot!</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Intelligence can turn me on a bit.</font><br />
* Intelligence does nothing for me either way.<br />
* Intelligence turns me off.<br />
'''How long do your romantic relationships usually last?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">0-6 months</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">6-12 months</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">12+ months</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>I've never been in a relationship</u></font><br />
'''Do you believe in monogamy?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">I'm Not Sure</font><br />
<br />
==Sex==<br />
'''I prefer to sleep ...'''<br />
* Alone<br />
* With my partner, but apart (not touching)<br />
* <font color="#009000">Touching my partner</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Embracing / cuddling my partner</u></font><br />
'''You're in a relationship/marriage and feel that you and your mate aren't having sex frequently enough. What do you do?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Talk to them about it</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Try to spice things up. (Toys, fantasies, etc)</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Do nothing, but hope things change naturally.</font><br />
* Cheat on them / Break up with them.<br />
'''How willing would you be to try out new things sexually with a partner?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Completely willing.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Somewhat willing.</font><br />
* Not at all willing.<br />
'''[[Women's Rights|Straight women who kiss or fondle each other]] in clubs in the hopes of attracting men are...'''<br />
* <u>Incredibly hot!</u><br />
* <font color="#009000">Just having some girlish fun.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Profoundly annoying.</font><br />
'''How would you feel if your partner asked you to get tested for STDs before having sex with you for the first time?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Positive (relieved, accepting, happy, or proud).</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Neutral.</font><br />
* Negative (offended, annoyed, angry, or afraid).<br />
'''You're in a romantic relationship with someone you really like. As far as you're concerned, how long will it take before you'll have [[Chris and Sex|sex]]?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>1-2 dates</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">3-5 dates</font><br />
* 6 or more dates<br />
* Only after the wedding<br />
'''How important is it that a partner be capable of intelligent intercourse?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Very important.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Somewhat important.</u></font><br />
* Not important.<br />
'''Might you consider dating someone who confided to you that he/she had a sexually transmitted disease?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No</u></font><br />
'''Ideally, how often would you have sex?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Every day</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>3 to 4 times per week</u></font><br />
* 1 to 2 times per week<br />
* less than once per week<br />
'''How open are you to trying new things in bed?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Very open. I'll try anything once.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>I'm open, but I don't get too crazy.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Hesitant, but it might happen.</font><br />
* Not at all.<br />
'''Do you like to cuddle?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes.</u></font><br />
* No.<br />
* Sometimes - It depends.<br />
'''Is contraception morally wrong?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Depends on the kind</font><br />
'''Would you need to sleep with someone before you considered marrying them?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* No<br />
'''Which best represents your opinion of [[homos|same-sex relationships]]?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Girl-on-girl is okay, but guy-on-guy is wrong.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Guy-on-guy is okay, but girl-on-girl is wrong.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">All same-sex relationships are wrong.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">It's all fine by me.</font><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
==Faith and Religion==<br />
'''Are you Christian?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No</font><br />
'''Should evolution and creationism be taught side-by-side in public schools?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes, students should hear both sides</u></font><br />
* No, creationism has no place in public schools<br />
* No, evolution has no place in public schools<br />
'''Would you ever change your religion (or adopt one) because your significant other wanted you to?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">I'm Not Sure</font><br />
'''Would you date an atheist?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No</u></font><br />
'''How important is [[Chris and religion|religion/God]] in your life?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Extremely important</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Somewhat important</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Not very important</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Not at all important</font><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
==Life and [[Death]]==<br />
'''How do you feel about kids?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Kids are precious - they love me and I love them!</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">They're okay, but keep the unruly ones at bay.</font><br />
* God, how revolting. *shudder*<br />
* <font color="#009000">I'm indifferent.</font><br />
'''If your best friend began talking of suicide and asked you not to tell anyone, would you be willing to honor their request?'''<br />
* Yes, it's their life to do with as they see fit.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes, but I'd do my best to talk them out of it.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No, I'd find help for them.</font><br />
'''What is most appealing?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Settling down with a family someday</u></font><br />
* A life of singledom<br />
* <font color="#009000">Living spontaneousy and in the moment</font><br />
'''When a [[PandaHalo|woman]] chooses to abort a pregnancy, should she be required to inform [[Clyde Cash|the father]]?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Possibly, depending upon other factors.</u></font><br />
'''If it comes to having children, would you prefer to adopt or to be one of the biological parents?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>I would rather be one of the biological parents.</u></font><br />
* I would rather adopt.<br />
* Either would be equally fine.<br />
* Neither - I'd prefer to not have children at all.<br />
'''When is suicide okay?'''<br />
* Always.<br />
* In special cases, such as to prevent suffering.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Never.</u></font><br />
'''Would the world be a better place if people with low IQs were not allowed to reproduce?'''<br />
* Yes<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No</u></font><br />
'''To you, is abortion an option in case of an unwanted accidental pregnancy?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No</font><br />
'''If you had to name your greatest motivation in life thus far, what would it be?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Love</u></font><br />
* Wealth<br />
* <font color="#009000"> Expression</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Knowledge</font><br />
'''Are you happy with your life?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* No<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Most of the time</u></font><br />
'''Are you looking for a partner to have children with?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* No<br />
'''Would you ever consider adopting a child or being artificially inseminated on your own if you gave up on finding a life partner?'''<br />
* Yes, and I'd keep dating<br />
* Yes, and I'd dedicate myself to the child<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No, I wouldn't do it</u></font><br />
'''If you were to die, would whoever goes through your [[sex toys|personal belongings]] be shocked by what they find?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Maybe a little bit.</font><br />
<br />
==Hygiene==<br />
'''How important is it to you that your partner smell good?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Very damn important</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Important-ish</u></font><br />
* Less important than you might think<br />
* I just don't care.....at all<br />
'''Does finding a long-term partner give you license to "let yourself go," (lower your standards of personal hygiene or appearance or gain large amounts of weight)?'''<br />
* Yes, I preen only to attract a mate<br />
* <font color="#009000">No, I do it for myself</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No, I want to make sure I hang on to him/her</u></font><br />
* I have low standards in the first place<br />
'''How frequently do you bathe or shower?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">At least once a day.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Usually daily. I skip some.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000"> A couple times a week.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Once a week or less.</font><br />
'''How often do you brush your teeth?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Twice or more a day</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Once a day</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Only on days I feel like it</font><br />
* Rarely / never<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
==Vices and Virtues==<br />
'''Do you ever feel the need to get really [[Alcohol|drunk]]?'''<br />
* Often<br />
* <font color="#009000">Sometimes</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Rarely</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Never</font><br />
'''How often do you [[Tobacky|smoke cigarettes]]?'''<br />
* At least one cigarette a day<br />
* Once in a while / only when drinking / rarely<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Never</u></font><br />
'''Do you consider yourself to be an honorable person?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes, I always try to do the right thing.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Sometimes, it depends on the situation.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No, not really.</font><br />
* Are you kidding? I lie, cheat , AND steal.<br />
'''Are you careful with your money?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* No<br />
How often are you open with your [[Chris and Anger|feelings]]?<br />
* <font color="#009000">Always</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Usually</u></font><br />
* Rarely<br />
* Never<br />
'''Does smoking disgust you?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* No<br />
'''Rate your self-confidence:'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Very, very high</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Higher than average</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Average</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Below average</font><br />
'''What's your deal with harder drugs (not marijuana)?'''<br />
* I do drugs regularly.<br />
* I do drugs occasionally.<br />
* I've done drugs in the past, but no longer.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>I never do drugs.</u></font><br />
'''Do you keep a [[Chris and Money|budget (of your finances)]]?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* No<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Sometimes</u></font><br />
'''How often do you keep your promises?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">My word is my bond. No exceptions.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Whenever possible</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Usually</font><br />
* When convenient<br />
'''What's your relationship with marijuana?'''<br />
* I smoke regularly<br />
* I smoke occasionally<br />
* I smoked in the past, but no longer<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Never</u></font><br />
'''Are you vegetarian or vegan?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u> No</u></font><br />
'''Do you space out or daydream a lot?'''<br />
* All the time<br />
* <font color="#009000">Never / rarely</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Sometimes</u></font><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
==Misc.==<br />
'''Do you enjoy finding out what makes things work the way they do?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>I'm an information sponge</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Sometimes</font><br />
* As long as it works, who cares why?<br />
'''Without using a dictionary or other tool, can you choose the commonly misspelled word? Don't cheat! It's okay if you don't know.'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">1. separate</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>2. definate</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">3. committee</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">(Not sure / dumb question / who cares)</font><br />
'''Do you think women have an obligation to keep their legs shaved?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No</u></font><br />
'''Do you have a problem with [[Chris and Race|racist jokes]]?'''<br />
* Yes<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>No</u></font><br />
'''Do you like to be read to aloud?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Yes, it makes me happy.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Only when I'm sick.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Maybe when I was five.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Nope.</font><br />
'''Do you and your ideal significant other enjoy making sarcastic jokes at each other's expense, knowing that it's all in good fun?'''<br />
* Yes! That's a personality trait we have to share.<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Sometimes, but not too much.</u></font><br />
* No, sarcasm doesn't belong in a love relationship.<br />
* I can't dish it out, but I'd take it, I guess.<br />
'''Would you prefer good things happened, or interesting things?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Good</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Interesting</u></font><br />
'''What is your quest?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>To find true love.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">To find happiness.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">To find your fortune.</font><br />
* [[Monty Python|To find the Grail.]]<br />
'''How often do you meditate?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Frequently.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Rarely.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Never.</font><br />
'''Which is worse: [[Sonee & Rosey|starving children]] or [[Chandler cats|abused]] [[Patti Chandler|animals]]?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Starving children.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Abused animals.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Neither, both are good.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Neither, they are equally bad.</u></font><br />
'''How much influence or control do your parents have over your life?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">I am my own person.</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">I consider their opinion but go my own way.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>I almost always do what my parents think is best.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">I always do what my parents say.</font><br />
'''When birds stand on power lines and don't get hurt, it's most likely because of:'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Good timing; they only land between calls</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u> Body materials that are insulated from current</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Not touching anything else at the same time</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">They do get hurt; they just express it poorly</font><br />
'''If you don't do anything at all for an entire day, how does that make you feel?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Good</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Bad</u></font><br />
'''STALE is to STEAL as 89475 is to...'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">89457</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>[[Honor roll|98547]]</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">89754</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">89547</font><br />
'''Which of these is likely to make you more nervous?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>A promising first date</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">An important interview</font><br />
'''What is next in this series? 1, 4, 10, 19, 31, _'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">36</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">48</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>46</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Don't know / don't care / dislike this q</font><br />
'''Gender roles ...'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Exist for good reason - Should not be questioned.</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Are undergoing a refreshing redefinition.</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Are irrelevant, outdated and unnecessary.</font><br />
'''What is your [[Mass debating|back-up plan]] if you can't find a date on a Friday night?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">Call up a friend, go see a movie</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Hit the town solo: you never know what will happen</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Self-improvement: go to the gym or read a little</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Two words: drinking alone</font><br />
'''Are you an aspiring actor/artist/writer or other creative type?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">No</font><br />
'''Do you generally smile at little kids who cross your path?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Yes</u></font><br />
* No<br />
* <font color="#009000">Only if no one is looking</font><br />
'''Which is [[obesity|bigger]]?'''<br />
* <font color="#009000">The earth</font><br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>The sun</u></font><br />
'''To you, which adjective best describes hopeless, unrequited love?'''<br />
* <font color="#009100"><u>Romantic</u></font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Foolish</font><br />
* <font color="#009000">Creepy</font><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Lists}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Lists]]<br />
[[Category:Websites]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Alcohol&diff=95682Alcohol2010-06-10T10:33:40Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* Discovery */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{taxpayermoney}} <br />
[[Image:Sonichurosey.png|thumb|Ever since getting married to [[Rosechu]], [[Sonichu]] finds that Reeb helps dull the pain.]]<br />
<br />
Like [[sex toys|shoving things]] up his ass, '''alcohol''' was something that [[Chris]] used to preach against until he tried it and discovered he loved the pleasant effect. <br />
<br />
==Background==<br />
[[Image:Z100_0533.jpg|thumb|Finally Loosened up and flew to Long Island June 12, 2009. <b>Keep It Responsible</b>; ONLY One in a day, or 7 or less in all in a week. ''(Quote from [[CWCipedia]])'']]<br />
He considered alcohol a "slow-acting poison" in his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]] video. Alcohol is also mentioned in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], where in line 309, he mentions that he would not go to a singles bar because of it (and cigarettes). When asked about it in [[Mumble 2|Mumble Chat 2]], he stated that it "causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents".<br />
<br />
==Discovery==<br />
<br />
Despite this, a [[Chris's Big Night Out|video]] of Chris drinking a [[Long Island Iced Tea]] was uploaded to [[YouTube]] on 12 [[June 2009]] perhaps showing us Chris will be willing to throw all his principles out the window when chances of being around a female arise. Following the events of June 4th, Chris is guilty of drink-driving.<br />
<br />
==Hypocrisy==<br />
The citizens of CWCville themselves, however, are forced to consume only [[CWC Cola]], a cola made with Chris's [[semen|secret ingredient]] that would <s>taste better</s> '''be fit for human consumption''' if only it had a little rum or whiskey in it.<br />
<br />
==Chandler family and alcohol==<br />
<br />
It is interesting to note that [[Cole Smithey]] mentions that [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] and [[Barbara Chandler]] [[:Image:Cole_07-07-24-1.PNG|met at a bar and acted like a couple of drunken losers]].<br />
<br />
The Chandler family has a(n unsurprising) history with alcohol. Chris's maternal great-grandfather, Robert Pettis Wynn "drank heavily and had a [[sweetheart|girlfriend]] during the time he was married. Family stories say [[Bob|he failed to provide even the most basic support for his wife and children]] ...there are others who say he was a moonshiner."<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d118.html</ref><br />
<br />
==In the comic==<br />
[[Image:RealReeb.jpg|thumb|right|Reeb is the official drink of [[Kick the Autistic]].]]<br />
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|left|A worker at 4-Cent_Garbage downing a relaxing can of Reeb.]]<br />
<br />
In ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' Chris refers to beer in all instances as "Reeb". <br />
<br />
At first glance this seems odd until you realize Chris still thinks Sonichu is targeted towards children, and so, he feels he must censor any mention of alcohol in the comic. This is a common theme in English-translated anime shows such as [[Dragon Ball Z]] and [[Pokémon]]. <br />
<br />
Possessing or drinking alcohol was also one of the worst crimes to commit in [[CWCville]], and could have led to a $1500 fine or 10 years in prison<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> (the fact that Chris thinks that 10 years in prison and a $1500 fine are interchangeable is indicative of his broader attitude towards [[money]]). It is also interesting to note that this punishment is much more lenient than the CWCville penalty for [[homosexuality]].<ref>[[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|Mailbag 31]]</ref> And you thought Chris was intolerant.<br />
<br />
In his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video he announced that the prohibition had been repealed. Hopefully this will curb the bootlegging mafioso who held the city in a grip of pleasant distraction from the horrors of being ruled by Christian Weston Chandler.<br />
<br />
"Reeb" is the drink of choice for the drunkards at [[4-cent_garbage.com]].<br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Bob Chandler]] and [[Barbara Chandler]]<br />
*[[4-cent garbage.com]], where the workers often drink reeb<br />
*[[Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008]], where the CWCville crime is mentioned<br />
*[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]], where he gives [[Fail|"advice"]] on the subject<br />
<br />
{{Chris and}}<br />
<br />
[[Category: Social life]]<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Alcohol&diff=95681Alcohol2010-06-10T10:33:03Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{taxpayermoney}} <br />
[[Image:Sonichurosey.png|thumb|Ever since getting married to [[Rosechu]], [[Sonichu]] finds that Reeb helps dull the pain.]]<br />
<br />
Like [[sex toys|shoving things]] up his ass, '''alcohol''' was something that [[Chris]] used to preach against until he tried it and discovered he loved the pleasant effect. <br />
<br />
==Background==<br />
[[Image:Z100_0533.jpg|thumb|Finally Loosened up and flew to Long Island June 12, 2009. <b>Keep It Responsible</b>; ONLY One in a day, or 7 or less in all in a week. ''(Quote from [[CWCipedia]])'']]<br />
He considered alcohol a "slow-acting poison" in his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]] video. Alcohol is also mentioned in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], where in line 309, he mentions that he would not go to a singles bar because of it (and cigarettes). When asked about it in [[Mumble 2|Mumble Chat 2]], he stated that it "causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents".<br />
<br />
==Discovery==<br />
<br />
Despite this, a [[Chris's Big Night Out|video]] of Chris drinking a [[Long Island Iced Tea]] was uploaded to [[YouTube]] on 12 [[June 2009]] perhaps showing us Chris will be willing to throw all his principles out the window when chances of being around a female arise. Following the events of June 4th, Chris is now guilty of drink-driving.<br />
<br />
==Hypocrisy==<br />
The citizens of CWCville themselves, however, are forced to consume only [[CWC Cola]], a cola made with Chris's [[semen|secret ingredient]] that would <s>taste better</s> '''be fit for human consumption''' if only it had a little rum or whiskey in it.<br />
<br />
==Chandler family and alcohol==<br />
<br />
It is interesting to note that [[Cole Smithey]] mentions that [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] and [[Barbara Chandler]] [[:Image:Cole_07-07-24-1.PNG|met at a bar and acted like a couple of drunken losers]].<br />
<br />
The Chandler family has a(n unsurprising) history with alcohol. Chris's maternal great-grandfather, Robert Pettis Wynn "drank heavily and had a [[sweetheart|girlfriend]] during the time he was married. Family stories say [[Bob|he failed to provide even the most basic support for his wife and children]] ...there are others who say he was a moonshiner."<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d118.html</ref><br />
<br />
==In the comic==<br />
[[Image:RealReeb.jpg|thumb|right|Reeb is the official drink of [[Kick the Autistic]].]]<br />
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|left|A worker at 4-Cent_Garbage downing a relaxing can of Reeb.]]<br />
<br />
In ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' Chris refers to beer in all instances as "Reeb". <br />
<br />
At first glance this seems odd until you realize Chris still thinks Sonichu is targeted towards children, and so, he feels he must censor any mention of alcohol in the comic. This is a common theme in English-translated anime shows such as [[Dragon Ball Z]] and [[Pokémon]]. <br />
<br />
Possessing or drinking alcohol was also one of the worst crimes to commit in [[CWCville]], and could have led to a $1500 fine or 10 years in prison<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> (the fact that Chris thinks that 10 years in prison and a $1500 fine are interchangeable is indicative of his broader attitude towards [[money]]). It is also interesting to note that this punishment is much more lenient than the CWCville penalty for [[homosexuality]].<ref>[[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|Mailbag 31]]</ref> And you thought Chris was intolerant.<br />
<br />
In his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video he announced that the prohibition had been repealed. Hopefully this will curb the bootlegging mafioso who held the city in a grip of pleasant distraction from the horrors of being ruled by Christian Weston Chandler.<br />
<br />
"Reeb" is the drink of choice for the drunkards at [[4-cent_garbage.com]].<br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Bob Chandler]] and [[Barbara Chandler]]<br />
*[[4-cent garbage.com]], where the workers often drink reeb<br />
*[[Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008]], where the CWCville crime is mentioned<br />
*[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]], where he gives [[Fail|"advice"]] on the subject<br />
<br />
{{Chris and}}<br />
<br />
[[Category: Social life]]<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Lego&diff=94513Lego2010-06-04T11:00:12Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:118-LegoCWC.jpg|thumb|150px|Chris is just as fail in Lego form as any other.]]<br />
<br />
'''Lego'''™ is a brand of plastic building block toys. They are noted for their durability and ease of use allowing the creation of almost anything imaginable. [[Chris]] has relied heavily on Lego blocks to put his creations into reality. They were a staple gift during his childhood Christmas. And his late teens. And his early twenties...<br />
<br />
== Chris Lego Brick creations ==<br />
[[Image:0823-EP12-5P6-3.jpg|Panoramic vista of [[CWCville]], in all its blocky glory|thumb]]<br />
<br />
* [[Pixelated PS3]] (also made with [[Pixelblocks]])<br />
* Model [[CWCville]]<br />
* [[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]]<br />
* [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Mailbag "Heavy-duty case"] to hold his [[Card_games#Pok.C3.A9mon_TCG|Pokémon]] card decks, acknowledged by Chris as one of his most noteworthy [[inventions]] (also held together with tape)<br />
<br />
== Influences ==<br />
Bionicle, a very successful line of sets based on the adventures of biomechanical beings each gifted with elemental powers, may have (along with ''[[Pokémon]]'') influenced the creation of the [[Chaotic Combo]]. It should be noted, however, that the former came out about four years later than the latter, so Pokemon likely left their imprint first, especially since it had more elemental types.<br />
<br />
Inspired by his [[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]], [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] have a pair of Lego go-karts [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P35.jpg in their garage], the only vehicles they are shown to possess. This raises a number of problems; firstly, we are expected to believe that a bunch of giant plastic blocks, held together by frictional force alone, without visible seatbelts or a rollover cage, constitutes a road-safe vehicle. Second, each kart can only seat one individual. That's fine and dandy for the two adults, but where does that leave their children? Lastly, as they lack proper seats and possess a studded surface, they would be uncomfortable to drive in.<br />
<br />
== 启蒙 (Enlighten) Bricks Police Station set==<br />
<br />
[[Image:Comparisonsmall2.jpg|thumb|One of these things is not like the other...]]<br />
<br />
In one of Chris's birthday photos he is seen holding what appears to be a new Lego "6332-1 - Command Post Central".<ref>Link to Peeron page on set [http://www.peeron.com/inv/sets/6332-1 "6332-1 Command Post Central"]</ref> Upon further inspection it is apparent that is merely a rebranded 启蒙 Bricks "POLICE SERIES" set which is almost a direct clone of the original Lego set. Presumably the 启蒙 Bricks logo was altered by a third party and replaced with "LEGO bricks." Chris's parents probably bought it relatively cheap at a discount store that carries knock-off brands, so it's not like they were shopping for a quality present for Chris in the first place. It should be noted that 启蒙 Bricks are much more fragile than Lego and are of generally much poorer quality than Lego sets are, something that probably went unnoticed by Chris.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><br />
{{cg|Gallery of Legos|legogallery|center|<gallery><br />
Image:0092-Christians14th.jpg|Spyrius, fuck yeah! Christian's 14th birthday.<br />
Image:0790-CMas05-5.jpg|Chris and his new Lego in [[2005]]. Proof of pirated toy, look at the "Brick" font. Note that he is ''23'' in this photo.<br />
Image:0784-LegoPS3-1.JPG|The [[pixelated PS3]] of fail.<br />
</gallery>|<gallery><br />
Image:0128-Christmas96-6.jpg|Chris and his new Lego in [[1996]]<br />
Image:400-LegKrt1.jpg|If you have no idea how to make your own Lego Go-Cart, Chris has your back.<br />
Image:401-LegKrt2.jpg<br />
Image:0424-CwcvilleBandStand1.jpg|A Lego gift to [[Cole Smithey]], perhaps Chris's first [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (band)|band]]?<br />
Image:0425-CwcvilleBandStand2.jpg|A better view.<br />
Image:0426-InformationCenter1.jpg|A model of the Information Center from Lego Island.<br />
Image:0427-InformationCenter2.jpg|A rear view of the Information Center<br />
Image:0428-InformationCenter3.jpg|Further away view of Information Center.<br />
Image:0429-ChristianWTallStack1.jpg|A face expressing either pride or gas<br />
Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|[[Duck|More than seven inches long!]]<br />
Image:0431-CWCNuculus.jpg<br />
Image:0440-CWCAndHis9Karts.jpg<br />
Image:0438-CWCsMarioKartsX8.jpg<br />
Image:0439-CWCsMarioKartsX9.jpg<br />
Image:0441-MarioKartGPGroup.jpg<br />
Image:0443-9KartCarrier1.jpg<br />
Image:0785-LegoPS3-2.JPG|Moar of the pixelated PS3.<br />
Image:0783-LegoPS3AndGuitar.JPG|Pixelated PS3 and the [[Gitar]].<br />
Image:0111-LegoWalkman1.jpg|An earlier effort: The Lego Walkman<br />
Image:0828-EP12-5P7-1.jpg|Bionicle, the door's poster and figures in upper left corner.<br />
Image:0822-EP12-5P6-4.jpg|TIE Fighters zoom above a part of Lego CWCville<br />
Image:0825-EP12-5P6-8.jpg<br />
Image:0824-EP12-5P6-9.jpg|CWCville: An overbuilt Hell-hole ruled by a man-child.<br />
Image:0826-EP12-5P6-7.jpg|The money that paid for this could have gone to cancer patients.<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[List of Chris's games]]<br />
*[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]]<br />
*[[Pixelblocks]]<br />
*[[A Sonichu Day]]<br />
*[[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]<br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
[[Category:Hobbies]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Lego&diff=94512Lego2010-06-04T10:57:43Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:118-LegoCWC.jpg|thumb|150px|Chris is just as fail in Lego form as any other.]]<br />
<br />
'''Lego'''™ is a brand of plastic building block toys. They are noted for their durability and ease of use allowing the creation of almost anything imaginable. [[Chris]] has relied heavily on Lego blocks to put his creations into reality. They were a staple gift during his childhood Christmas. And his late teens...<br />
<br />
== Chris Lego Brick creations ==<br />
[[Image:0823-EP12-5P6-3.jpg|Panoramic vista of [[CWCville]], in all its blocky glory|thumb]]<br />
<br />
* [[Pixelated PS3]] (also made with [[Pixelblocks]])<br />
* Model [[CWCville]]<br />
* [[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]]<br />
* [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Mailbag "Heavy-duty case"] to hold his [[Card_games#Pok.C3.A9mon_TCG|Pokémon]] card decks, acknowledged by Chris as one of his most noteworthy [[inventions]] (also held together with tape)<br />
<br />
== Influences ==<br />
Bionicle, a very successful line of sets based on the adventures of biomechanical beings each gifted with elemental powers, may have (along with ''[[Pokémon]]'') influenced the creation of the [[Chaotic Combo]]. It should be noted, however, that the former came out about four years later than the latter, so Pokemon likely left their imprint first, especially since it had more elemental types.<br />
<br />
Inspired by his [[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]], [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] have a pair of Lego go-karts [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P35.jpg in their garage], the only vehicles they are shown to possess. This raises a number of problems; firstly, we are expected to believe that a bunch of giant plastic blocks, held together by frictional force alone, without visible seatbelts or a rollover cage, constitutes a road-safe vehicle. Second, each kart can only seat one individual. That's fine and dandy for the two adults, but where does that leave their children? Lastly, as they lack proper seats and possess a studded surface, they would be uncomfortable to drive in.<br />
<br />
== 启蒙 (Enlighten) Bricks Police Station set==<br />
<br />
[[Image:Comparisonsmall2.jpg|thumb|One of these things is not like the other...]]<br />
<br />
In one of Chris's birthday photos he is seen holding what appears to be a new Lego "6332-1 - Command Post Central".<ref>Link to Peeron page on set [http://www.peeron.com/inv/sets/6332-1 "6332-1 Command Post Central"]</ref> Upon further inspection it is apparent that is merely a rebranded 启蒙 Bricks "POLICE SERIES" set which is almost a direct clone of the original Lego set. Presumably the 启蒙 Bricks logo was altered by a third party and replaced with "LEGO bricks." Chris's parents probably bought it relatively cheap at a discount store that carries knock-off brands, so it's not like they were shopping for a quality present for Chris in the first place. It should be noted that 启蒙 Bricks are much more fragile than Lego and are of generally much poorer quality than Lego sets are, something that probably went unnoticed by Chris.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><br />
{{cg|Gallery of Legos|legogallery|center|<gallery><br />
Image:0092-Christians14th.jpg|Spyrius, fuck yeah! Christian's 14th birthday.<br />
Image:0790-CMas05-5.jpg|Chris and his new Lego in [[2005]]. Proof of pirated toy, look at the "Brick" font. Note that he is ''23'' in this photo.<br />
Image:0784-LegoPS3-1.JPG|The [[pixelated PS3]] of fail.<br />
</gallery>|<gallery><br />
Image:0128-Christmas96-6.jpg|Chris and his new Lego in [[1996]]<br />
Image:400-LegKrt1.jpg|If you have no idea how to make your own Lego Go-Cart, Chris has your back.<br />
Image:401-LegKrt2.jpg<br />
Image:0424-CwcvilleBandStand1.jpg|A Lego gift to [[Cole Smithey]], perhaps Chris's first [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (band)|band]]?<br />
Image:0425-CwcvilleBandStand2.jpg|A better view.<br />
Image:0426-InformationCenter1.jpg|A model of the Information Center from Lego Island.<br />
Image:0427-InformationCenter2.jpg|A rear view of the Information Center<br />
Image:0428-InformationCenter3.jpg|Further away view of Information Center.<br />
Image:0429-ChristianWTallStack1.jpg|A face expressing either pride or gas<br />
Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|[[Duck|More than seven inches long!]]<br />
Image:0431-CWCNuculus.jpg<br />
Image:0440-CWCAndHis9Karts.jpg<br />
Image:0438-CWCsMarioKartsX8.jpg<br />
Image:0439-CWCsMarioKartsX9.jpg<br />
Image:0441-MarioKartGPGroup.jpg<br />
Image:0443-9KartCarrier1.jpg<br />
Image:0785-LegoPS3-2.JPG|Moar of the pixelated PS3.<br />
Image:0783-LegoPS3AndGuitar.JPG|Pixelated PS3 and the [[Gitar]].<br />
Image:0111-LegoWalkman1.jpg|An earlier effort: The Lego Walkman<br />
Image:0828-EP12-5P7-1.jpg|Bionicle, the door's poster and figures in upper left corner.<br />
Image:0822-EP12-5P6-4.jpg|TIE Fighters zoom above a part of Lego CWCville<br />
Image:0825-EP12-5P6-8.jpg<br />
Image:0824-EP12-5P6-9.jpg|CWCville: An overbuilt Hell-hole ruled by a man-child.<br />
Image:0826-EP12-5P6-7.jpg|The money that paid for this could have gone to cancer patients.<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[List of Chris's games]]<br />
*[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]]<br />
*[[Pixelblocks]]<br />
*[[A Sonichu Day]]<br />
*[[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]<br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
[[Category:Hobbies]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Get-Tar_Region&diff=94139Get-Tar Region2010-06-02T12:32:36Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: /* 7-20-2005 NEVAR FORGET */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{quote|<small>"July 20, 2005: … I was at the new Target store, just hanging around, not bothering anyone. And, from out of the blue, these two [[Manajerks]] asked me to leave, because they said that I was loitering; I was [[Virgin with rage|NOT]]! I was there [[Love Quest|hoping to find an 18-23-year old, Boyfriend-Free girl]], like I usually do. Then, from out of the blue, after I told them off, they came back with two [[Jerkops]]! I was [[Lie|slightly intimidated]], but mostly [[Stress|annoyed]] and [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|ready to strike back on them]]. They asked me to leave, and never return. I did not want to leave. I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|prepared]] speech to say to them stupid Jerkops. And, during the middle of my speech, they chased me, pulled my [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|pants]], and [[Kick the autistic|pinned me to the floor]]. Five Jerkops [[Patti Chandler|dog]]-piled on me as I struggled to get free. A thousand pounds of [[Pickles|sausages]] on my [[Lies|180 pound]] body was seriously a [[Semen|cut-off for my Breathing Flow]]. They handcuffed my wrists and legs, and they hog-tied me! Not only did I felt humiliated from being the [[Homos|victim]], but I was [[Fangs|angry]] at them! Not only for handcuffing me, but once again thwarting my efforts in trying to find a [[Boyfriend-Free Girl]]. They drove me to the county jail, but fortunately, they did not keep me there; I was released to my [[Bob Chandler|family]]. But now I have to go to [[Chris and the Law|court]] on July 29 at 9:00 AM at the Albemarle County Courthouse, close to the Downtown Mall. So now, I feel very miserable, sad, lonely and rejected. And, while I had the [[Sex toys|handcuffs]] on me, both my hands, mostly my right, were seriously cut off from blood flow, and they both felt numb. It was terrible. But my [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] and I are going to get back at them in court, in fact, I learned that the Jerkop who arrested me was called [[Bagget]] (that was the only thing about the situation that was hilarious; replace the “B” with an “F,” and you can see how [[Random-access humor|funny]] it was). </small>|[[Christian Weston Chandler]], comic genius}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:Target Charlottesville.jpg|thumb|right|250px|The Charlottesville branch of Target.]]<br />
<br />
The above was basically Chris's personal 9/11. Planes into buildings? That's nothing. He got ''handcuffed''. <br />
<br />
On this 20th of July, Chris felt it'd be a great idea to head down to his local '''[[Wikipedia:Target Corporation|Target]]''' and continue his [[love quest]]. After being told to leave because he was loitering and disturbing customers, Chris fought back and was eventually restrained, handcuffed at his wrists and ankles, and even worse, cuffed to a wheelchair like a slow-in-the-mind. <br />
<br />
The incident distressed Chris so greatly that he adapted it into Subepisodes 7 and 8 of ''[[Sonichu 4]]'', entitled "Off-Target." "Cleverly" renaming the Target the "Get-Tar Region" (which causes many newfags to think Chris is talking about the guitar retail chain [[Wikipedia:Guitar Center|Guitar Center]]), the story seems surprisingly faithful to what really happened that day, at least until the sword-fight and the part where his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (character)|imaginary twin sister]] saves him from a [[Transformers|Transformer]].<br />
<br />
What's interesting to note about the story is how Chris betrays himself in his attempt to whitewash the story to make himself the hero. At the beginning of "Off-Target," he all but admits that he plans to use the new locale to sit around all day, using the [[Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail]] to fill the singularity inside his gut with their soda, drawing his shit comics, and waiting for tee-totaling Aryan supermodels to show up and bear his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]].<br />
<br />
{{quote|<small>This is a great set-up.. an open bar facing the path to the exit, a dollar for a drink with free refills, and all the ladies will have to walk by me. I'm bound to be found by a Boyfriend free, 18-23-Year old girl now. Especially since this Love Quest has been going on for about two years now. Toodie-Froodie, drawing comics all day long. Only three days since I skipped my last deadline! :)</small>|Christian Weston Chandler, Sonichu #4}}<br />
<br />
So by Chris's own admission, his intention was to pay the good people at Target a dollar a day to let him sit in their store and bother female customers until he got laid or died, whichever came first. Strangely, the management wasn't really thrilled with this arrangement, and as the comic shows, Chris clearly can't understand why loitering on private property is bad. <br />
<br />
Instead of focusing on the Manajerks/Jerkops' motivations, Chris simply infers that they despise him for being an autistic virgin, and places the most attention on the indignity he suffered from his arrest. Hence, the comic shows Chris being tackled (albeit by a giant robot), "hog-timed" (complete with apple, as if he were about to be rotisseried), and hauled off for trial (by [[Mary Lee Walsh]], in a scene ripped off from "Transformers the Movie"). <br />
<br />
In another example of how selfish Chris really is, he essentially writes his own mother out of the story, and has Crystal rescue him instead. That's gratitude for you.<br />
<br />
==The real story==<br />
{{quote|I'm sure you all remember the Target incident. Where he got "hog tied" by the jerkops, had his pants pulled down, face rubbed against the carpet and cried a tear of blood? Yeah, about that. First, he was kicked out within a few days to a week of Target opening. That's just sad. When he was approached by management to leave, he ignored them. When they kept pressing, he finally back talked them and called them jerkops. When the cops came, guess what Chris did....[[Fail|He tried to fucking run.]] Hence why he was hog tied and I'm sure in that struggle his pants just happened to come off.|[[Emily]]}}<br />
<br />
==7-20-2005==<br />
<gallery><br />
Image: Chris-Straw.jpg|[[The Oversized Drinking Straw|Summary of Chris's agenda at the Get-Tar Region.]]<br />
Image: Chris-Dog-Pile.jpg|The Jerkhief puts his thousand pound sausage in Chris<br />
Image: Chris-Carpet-Burn.jpg|HOG-TIME HIM!<br />
Image: chris.jpg|IT'S HOG TIME!!!<br />
</gallery><br />
<br />
==See Also==<br />
* [[The Oversized Drinking Straw]]<br />
<br />
{{Places}}<br />
{{CWCverse}}<br />
[[Category:Attraction Locations]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Bruce_Johnson&diff=91012Bruce Johnson2010-05-17T08:47:19Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>Dr. '''Bruce Johnson''' was the principal of [[Chris]]'s elementary school and a supposed [[homo]]. [[Bob Chandler]] hated his guts. Chris claims to have hated sitting on his lap, giving him his homophobia. In reality, the Chandler family's conflict with Dr. Johnson was about his desire to send Chris to an institution because of Chris's dangerous behavior.<br />
<br />
{{quotebox|The Principle of the [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Nathanel Greene Elemetary School[sic]]], Dr. Johnson, was a Homo, and when I was sent to his office; he picked me up, set me on his lap, then I would always get off his lap, because I ALWAYS HATED that; I felt bad vibes back then. Fortunately, it has never gone beyond that, and my father caught his intentions on that, and the Court Battles Started. He likely exagerates[sic], but my father knew that there were a bunch of homos within that school board, and that was why they hated me and my family, in addition to those people not understanding Autism. Anyway, from those past memories, that is why I have grown up to Rarely Associate with men, and why I DESPIE THE HOMOS the Worst.}}<br />
<br><br />
<br />
==Debate==<br />
<br />
Chris claims that this is the event that caused his family to move to another school; however, Bob Chandler revealed to Emily that they threatened to send Chris to an institution which is why they move, and stated in a [[IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES|newspaper article]] in 1993 that "The Greene County School system was not equipped to teach an autistic child."<br />
<br />
The validity of this story is questionable.<br />
<br />
The most obvious problem is how an openly homosexual man in the conservative fundamentalist [[Wikipedia:Southern United States|South]] would be able to secure a job as principal of a small town elementary school without being lynched. So what's the likelihood of there being ''several'' openly homosexual and lesbian faculty members under the same roof? <br />
<br />
Bob, being old fashioned (keyword ''old''), [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijbovskICjk probably still thinks "homosexual" and "pedophile" are interchangeable]. How an openly homosexual man would even exist (we're assuming they'd get out of Dodge as fast as possible), let alone ''survive'' in the conservative fundamentalist South is an even bigger mystery. Pick the gayest, most faggoty fag you can find on [[Wikipedia:The Castro, San Francisco, California|Castro Street]] and put him in Southern Virginia. He'd be a dead man walking. But we all know how good Chris is at critical thinking. He ''was'' on the [[honor roll]]. <br />
<br />
While yes, intuition is an underappreciated sense that can tell us many things about another person, like whether they are safe or not, autistics aren't as naturally intuitive as normal kids. Chris obviously has no sense of intuition or inkling of body language. So him getting "bad vibes" was just hindsight bias (and probably some help from Bob and Barb manipulating his memory) as he tries to justify himself.<br />
<br />
For argument's sake, let's say that there were homos on the school board. What would they have against the Chandlers? Sure, they're Baptists and against homosexuality, but so is everyone else in the area. Why would they single him out of all the other homophobic families? If anything, they'd assume that Chris was too young and stupid to understand complex matters like sexuality and same-sex relationships, and figure that they could enlighten him. They'd want to ''help'' him, not expel him for his parents' ignorance. Otherwise, that would look ''really'' bad on their part and cause an uproar from the Christian community (read: everyone within a 20 mile radius). The only thing that public school boards can expel kids for expressing (and teachers, for that matter) is outright racism. <br />
<br />
His later statements also contradict why he "doesn't like to associate with men". On [[Mumble]], when confronted about how only gays have all female friends (harem anime don't count, they're ''fiction''), he paused, clearly backed into a wall, and whined that he never got the chance to make friends with other guys, despite having ''plenty'' of chances throughout his schooling. This is another instance of him trying to justify himself.<br />
<br />
==[[Wikipedia:Captain Underpants|Captain Underpants]]==<br />
<br />
Years after Chris left Nathanael Greene, Dr. Johnson finally vindicated Chris's claims by showing the entire world what a sick perv he is:<br />
<br />
<blockquote>“Principal Bruce Johnson revealed his shockingly silly alter ego to the students of Stanardsville, Virginia's Nathanael Greene Elementary after they improved their [[Wikipedia:Standardized test|standardized test scores]]. Johnson appeared on the school's roof as Captain Underpants, hero of the popular children's book series. The outfit included a red cape, white undershirt, and large white underpants worn over his clothes. "We'll have to do this every year to get the scores up," Superintendent Ray Dingledine [seriously?] told the ''Daily Progress''. Added Johnson, "They'll laugh at me out here, but when it comes to being in the office, there's no arguing.”<ref>http://books.google.com/books?id=vnLetsZ4l4kC&pg=PA82</ref></blockquote><br />
<br />
Sounds like the best principal ever, to me.<br />
<br />
==See Also==<br />
[[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
{{People}}<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Johnson, Bruce}}<br />
[[Category: People]]</div>Thedarkcloud4https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mary_Lee_Walsh&diff=88761Mary Lee Walsh2010-05-08T22:31:03Z<p>Thedarkcloud4: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Sonichu07-P38.jpg|left|thumb|Mary Lee Walsh, as she appears in the [[comic]] (and in [[Cwcipedia]]). Chris draws her tits almost as big as the fans do.]]<br />
[[Image:Mary-lee-Walsh.jpg|thumb|Mary as we know and [[Mass debating|love her]]]]<br />
<br />
{{quote|You're not gonna get a Girlfriend, this way or any way. [Fu fu fu!]|Mary Lee Walsh, quoted by Chris.}}<br />
<br />
Lovingly referred to as a "bitch", "witch", "old hag", etc., '''Mary Lee Walsh''' (later [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retconned]] as '''Slaweel Ryam''') was a proto-[[troll]] who thwarted [[Chris]]'s [[love quest]] by ripping up his [[Attraction Sign]] and suspending him from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. <br />
<br />
Mary Lee Walsh is one of the most important people in Chris's history, as she is one of the few people who saw through Chris's [[autistic]] bullshit and tried to make him act like a normal human being. The resulting conflict between Chris and Mary Lee affected Chris so profoundly that she became the sole focus of many early ''[[Sonichu]]'' [[Sub-Episodes]]. Even to this day, she is still the one of the chief villains in the ''Sonichu'' series. As such, she is revered and cherished among trolls for her actions, both in real life, and in Sonichu fiction. <br />
<br />
All hail the Dean!<br />
<br />
==Mary Lee Walsh in real life==<br />
Walsh is the Dean of Student Affairs at the PVCC and a member of the [[Virginia]] Sexual and Domestic Violence Action Alliance ([http://www.vadv.org/secGetHelp/Directory%20of%20Services/campusprgms_p-z.html srsly]). In the past, Chris had been scolded by her for passing around photocopies of his "[[Sonichu's News Dash]]" newsletter, and she finally delivered the crushing blow when Chris was loitering with his usual [[sign|attraction sign]]. Walsh tore down his sign and told him that he would never get a girlfriend this way, or indeed at all.<br />
<br />
Chris, being the narcissist he is, disregarded her warnings and continued to place ads for his "love quest" all over the PVCC campus. Walsh, most likely pissed off that this retard kept defying her authority, took Chris to her office to discuss the situation with him. After what Chris described as being "talked down...to RUDELY AND HOARSELY," he attacked her in a fit of [[Chris and anger|tard rage]]. This resulted in a year-long expulsion from PVCC. He was forced to take anger management classes and get psychiatric help before he was let back in.<ref name="wikipedia">[[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Enter_the_Wicked_Witch_of_the_Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens|User:ChrisChanSonichu]]</ref><br />
<br />
===Soul-crusher===<br />
[[Image:MaryLeeWalsh-IRL.JPG|thumb|left|Contrary to how she is rendered in various media, Mary Lee Walsh is not very attractive in person.]]<br />
[[Image:143-MaryLeeWalsh.jpg|thumb|Anyone but Hslaw Eel Yram!]]<br />
<br />
{{quote|So, as of August, [[2003|Y2K3]], I did the most logical, sensible and inexpensive idea I could think of, I made a simple [[sign]] that stated, "I am a 21-year old and Single Male Seeking and 18-21-year old SINGLE [[Gal-pal|FEMALE COMPANION]]", along with a basic description of qualities I felt were best suited, due to the fact that it describe MOST every [[Boyfriend-free girl|Boyfriend-Free]], 18-21year old Girl. Sadly though, not a single one even gave me a glanced, a momentary pause or even an excuse-making throat clearing to read the sign or give me the time of day. And the few who noticed... That EVIL WITCH OF THE [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PrivateVilla of Corrupted Citizens]], Mary Lee Walsh, a bunch of Non-Blue or Black impersonating [[Jerkops|JERKOPS]], [[Manajerks]] and every other (only a few total) son/daughter of a #@&*.. MOCKED ME AND EVEN CRUMBLED MY EFFORTS AND THREW THEM INTO MY FACE! IT WAS SERIOUS HEART-SHATTERING INSULTS LIKE THAT WHICH LITERALLY SHATTERED MY HEART TO ALMOST NOTHING AND MURDERED MY SOUL! Like as if I didn't already understand that [[Love]] Can't be Hurried; but they ALL left a HUGE IMPRESSION among the general population that having a [[Sweetheart]] was ILLEGAL IN VIRGINIA thus, "[[Virginia is for Virgins|VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS]], NOT LOVERS!" was what I had thought for a long time with the Dark Forces that were forced into me, bedding with my torturing past with the jerks of the Greene County School System during the childhood years of my life. Thank God for blessing me with many happy years at [[Providence Middle School]] and [[Manchester High School]] in Chesterfield; rounding my feelings and attitude out for today.|Chris being butthurt}}<br />
<br />
===Emails with Mary===<br />
<div style="border:1px dotted #4682B4;padding:5px; background-color:#F0F8FF"><br />
'''From: CWCSonichu@aol.com'''<br><br />
'''Sent: Sunday, February 01, 2004 1:22 PM'''<br><br />
'''To: mwalsh@pvcc.edu'''<br><br />
'''Subject: Hi again...'''<br />
<br />
Mary, I've slept on it, and I have realized that note-hanging is not the way to get attention. And I don't really want to meet with either you nor Susan, no offense. I'll tell you what, let's forget the meeting, and if you will allow my newsletter to stay in distribution, I will do all of the following:<br />
<br />
-I will never hang notes on the wall again.<br><br />
-I'll consider stopping my Silent Treatment on Susan.<br><br />
-I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my scale of Respect each by 2 points (0=No Respect...10=Respect).<br><br />
<br />
Please reply via E-Mail.<br />
<br />
Christian C.<br />
</div><br />
<br><br />
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'''From: Mary Lee Walsh <mwalsh@pvcc.edu>'''<br><br />
'''To: CWCSonichu@aol.com'''<br><br />
'''Sent: Tue, 3 Feb 2004 8:54 am'''<br><br />
'''Subject: RE: Hi again...'''<br />
<br />
Christian:<br />
Susan Hannifan and I will be able to meet with you on Monday February 9th in my office at 3:00 p.m. I do not have any time this week that works with all of our schedules, so it will have to be next Monday. I normally send students notice of appointments by mail, but you have asked that I correspond to you through email. It is necessary that this meeting take place, so if Monday is not convenient for you please let me know and we will set a time for Wednesday.</div><br />
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'''From: CWCSonichu@aol.com'''<br><br />
'''To: Virginia_Sanford@ccpsnet.net'''<br><br />
'''Sent: Wed, 21 Feb 2007 3:32:50 PM Eastern Standard Time'''<br><br />
'''Subject: Re: Hello'''<br />
<br />
Hey, Mrs. Sanford (or should I say Ginny or [[Virginia]] ), I am delighted to hear from you as well. And It is also good to know that you are still residing at that address. The [[DVD]] is under production, to be completed a few days after February 24, [[2007]] (my 25th Birthday...Yay).<br />
<br />
You may be able to help me in a portion of it now; there will be a [[Slideshow]] (projected from my [[PlayStation Portable]]) featuring not only pics of me growing up, but the friends, teachers and relatives I've known and remembered (either from heart, like yourself, as well as yearbook signatures). Anyway, do you remember from the ol' class, Sarah and Micha (the blonde girl with glasses, and the slow-talking african american who Ms. Eckel told over and over to get his dad to teach him how to shave)? I remembered both of them from heart, but unfortunately I don't remember their last names, so it's harder to find them in the yearbooks; could you tell me their last names, please?<br />
<br />
<font style="background-color: #87CEEB">As for what had happened during PVCC, in a nutshell; about Mid-Summer, 2003, I've realize upon revolation that I needed a girl friend to make into a Sweetheart from the Ground-Up, so with a sign (which I've later realized that it made me look slow-minded; the "R" Word), I've started my Enduring Love Quest. The Dean of Student Serveces, Mary Lee Walsh came out and tore my sign up right in front of me, and said, "You're not gonna get a Girlfriend this way or any way." That *&^%$ SHATTERED MY HEART AND MURDERED MY SOUL. And it wasn't just her, the Policemen Imposters in Brown, White and Red, AKA The Jerkops (Blue and Black ARE the TRUE POLICE SOLDIERS) also seriously indented the impression that "Virgina is for Virgins, NOT Lovers".</font><br />
<br />
But it has a happy ending; in Mid-[[2005]], when I've started playing the [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] TCG, I met [[Megan|this girl]] who upon numerous conversations, art-sharing and secret confidence, I've grown fond of, and my Heart and Soul Recovered from the Serious Emotional and Physical Pain I've endured. Although she's not intrested in a serious relationship, I still am fond of her, and I'm hoping that she may have a change of heart.<br />
<br />
You may learn more about what had happened to me from the Sub-Episodes in my "Sonichu" Comic Book, which I have the legable images uploaded onto my CWC's Sonichu Site!; those Sub-Episodes are based on my Real-Life Events. *[[sigh]]*<br />
<br />
Well, that's about it for now; I hope you do well as well. And I will make that DVD copy for you after I've finalized the master copy. Please tell the remaing faculty who are still working at Providence that I wish them the best as well. I still remember Mrs. Rogers (my ol' computer teacher) when she played as Woodstock in the [[1990s#1996|1996]] "Snoopy" play; that was just fun and cute. :)<br />
<br />
Take care;<br />
Christian Weston Chandler, A.K.A. (nickname) Chris Chan. <br />
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==Coping mechanisms==<br />
Because of all the [[stress]] Mary Lee Walsh caused, Chris obsessed over his HEART-SHATTERING defeat and had to re-invent the entire scenario so that he came out as the victor. Chris began to turn her into a villain in his mind, envisioning himself as a conquering hero. Walsh begins to appear in a lot of Chris's works as the ever-present antagonist opposing his [[Love Quest]].<br />
<br />
===Mary Lee Walsh in ''Sonichu''===<br />
[[Image:MachPunch.jpg|thumb|THIS IS WHAT CHRIS ACTUALLY BELIEVES.]]<br />
{{quote|After the first encounter with Mary, I put her into my comics from the start as MY personal MAIN Adversary, with her hoard of Impostor Police People, also known as [[Jerkop]]s, and the Notorious Count Graduon trapped in the glass orb on the scepter she wields.|Chris, failing to remember that the comic series was supposed to be about Sonichu, not him}}<br />
<br><br />
[[Image:MaryWantsIt.JPG|thumb|Despite the fact that Chris hates Mary Lee Walsh, this didn't stop him from picking up his markers and making hideous porn of her.]]<br />
<br />
In the comic, Walsh is Chris's arch nemesis, a sinister witch with typical demonic attributes who flies around on a broom, bent on thwarting his love quest. She works alongside [[Count Graduon]], sharing the same theme as a villain derived from Chris's failures in community college. She always wears a yellow Viking helmet with red horns. <br />
<br />
Mary Lee Walsh appears in ''Sonichu'' issues #0, #2, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9 and #10. <br />
<br />
*In [[Sonichu 0|Sonichu #0]], Mary Lee Walsh is is introduced as a "two-bit villain" and there is a short, 2 page short of Mary Lee Walsh fighting [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Chris-chan Sonichu]]. <br />
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*In [[Sonichu 2|Sonichu #2]], Chris breaks into Mary Lee Walsh's house, fights her as [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] and defeats her with Sonichu (editors note: I secretly wish this is another distorted version of actual events). <br />
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*The events in [[Sonichu 4|Sonichu #4]] are a continuation of the short story in Sonichu #0. Mary Lee Walsh sends Jerkop Daitenzen [[Bagget]] to attack Christian at the [[Get-Tar Region]]. Mary also makes a brief cameo in [[Sonichu 4#Sub-Episode 5: Christian Chandler in "McAttack part 2"|Sub-Episode 5: Christian Chandler in "McAttack part 2"]], where she gets bonked by [[W-M-Manajerk]]'s head. <br />
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*[[Sonichu 5|Sonichu #5]] depicts an epic battle between Mary Lee Walsh's Jerkop army in a standoff with the CWCville police. Mary Lee Walsh and Count Graduon use the [[Dark Mirror Hole]] against Chris and accidentally trap Chris's imaginary sister, [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]] inside it. <br />
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*In [[Sonichu 6|Sonichu #6]], [[Sailor Megtune]], [[Patti-Chan]] and [[Darkbind Sonichu]] steal the Dark Mirror Hole from Mary Lee Walsh. Chris vowes to collect all the [[Sonichu Balls]] to release Crystal, and then promptly forgets about it.<br />
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*In [[Sonichu 7|Sonichu #7]], Chris has some bullshit reason to use time travel as a plot device. While Chris is away, Mary Lee Walsh plans to launch an attack against [[CWCville]]. However, Chris never continued the story as we know it, and left this arc completely hanging. <br />
<br />
*Mary Lee Walsh gets a brief cameo in [[Sonichu 8|Sonichu #8]] where fan art of her appeared on the computer screen of a [[4-cent garbage.com]] employee on the 8th floor.<br />
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* In [[Sonichu 9|Sonichu #9]], Mary Lee Walsh engages in an epic non-fight with the heroes, culminating in an aerial non-combat with Sonichu. In spite of earlier rumors to the contrary, Sonichu fails to defeat Mary Lee Walsh once and for all, because that honor has been reserved solely for the Time Void-stranded intrusive creator of the comic. Sonichu is not worthy of doing that because he's ''only'' the title character of the comic.<br />
<br />
*Finally, in [[Sonichu 10|Sonichu #10]], Chris appears to wrap up Mary's role in the main storyline. He frees all of her [[jerkop|jerkops]] and [[manajerk|manajerks]] from their hypnosis, and fights her in a largely anti-climactic battle which ends with her paralyzed and incarcerated in a maximum security prison.<br />
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Chris has also drawn a Rule 34 art of her.<br />
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===Renaming and retcons===<br />
As a result of the [[Miyamoto saga]], many characters based on real-life figures were renamed; in a remarkable display of subtlety, Mary Lee Walsh became '''"Slaweel Ryam"''' or '''"Slaweel the Witch"'''. This is very subtle - as one can see, the name is not ''entirely'' backwards, and there are letters missing! No one will figure this out - especially when the notice regarding the name change, with old and new names, was posted prominently on the [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|Sonichu.net]] front page. Walsh being one of the primary villains in both the comic and real life, Chris obviously didn't want to change the name to an entirely unrecognizable form (that would require originality, which Chris obviously lacks). The name seems to be an evolution of "Hslaweel Yram", which was Chris's version of MLW in his custom [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] cards: in all likelihood, he had only used the "reverse code" as a means to insult Mary with the card without fear of getting in trouble if someone saw said card.<br />
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In August [[2009]], Chris put up a [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/TwoMarys page on CWCipedia entitled 'TwoMarys'] where he tried to explain the retconning of Mary Lee Walsh's name to Slaweel Ryam. Basically, the evil Mary Lee Walsh had been Slaweel all along, except Slaweel changed her name from Mary Lee Walsh to Slaweel Ryam later on, while the ''real'' Mary was innocent the whole time. This of course makes [[List of Chris's lies|absolutely no sense]] as Chris has changed ''every'' instance of the 'evil' Mary's name to Slaweel in the most recent edits of his comics, even during her introduction in Sonichu #0 where her character is introduced as "Slaweel the Witch" and not Mary Lee Walsh. Chris has essentially created a paradox in his comic's timeline - he's made a [[:File:Apology_to_Mary_Lee.jpg|comic]] where Slaweel, caught by Chris and the police, apologizes to Mary for ruining her good name, but the way he's retconned it Slaweel [[Fail|hasn't really had a chance to ruin Mary's name in the first place]]. Another glaring contradiction is that Slaweel says in the apology comic that she's ''"sorry for using [Mary's] name in vain and when I constructed P.V.C.Citizens, and made [Mary] look a fool for about six years"'' but on the [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/TwoMarys 'TwoMarys' page], this caption appears below a picture of Slaweel Ryam:<br />
<br />
{{quote|This Mary later changed her name to Slaweel Ryam, and she was creating witch brew during night hours and sharing them illegally with the bums outside of the building; she was fired from PVCC '''then went on to build PVCCitizens'''.|Chris, demonstrating his inability to create a [[Fail|cohesive plot]].}}<br />
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===Mary Lee Walsh in ''[[Soul Calibur]]''===<br />
It is debatable whether or not Chris ever attempted to physically harm Mary Lee Walsh, but in a video he uploaded to [[YouTube]], Chris lives out his fantasy of beating the tar out of Mrs. Walsh. Chris created himself and many other real life friends and enemies in the game ''[[Soul Calibur]] III'', so that he could take out his pent up [[Virgin with rage|rage]] in the most disturbing, passive-aggressive manner possible. [[Fail|It should be noted that Chris is terrible at ''Soul Calibur'', and appears to struggle with defeating an AI-controlled Mary Lee Walsh on the easiest setting.]]<br />
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==Possible reconciliation==<br />
[[Image:Apology to Mary Lee.jpg|thumb|Notice that Chris isn't sorry for the shit he did to warrant her anger, only that he let someone with her name run around. And why bother having two separate Mary Lee Walshes if he made her Slaweel?]]<br />
<br />
In a recent [[CWCipedia]] entry, Chris has reexamined Mary's value to society and distinguished her from the primary villain in his comic book. According to Chris there is the evil Mary Lee Walsh we all know and admire, and the Mary Lee Walsh that replaced her sometime in [[2000]].<br />
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{{quote|This Mary replaced the previous one in mid-2000; she has done a good job with her role as Dean of Student Services. She is Currently and To Be Respected with Open Kindness and Prosperity from ALL the Piedmont Virginia Commuinity College Students, Peers and Employees.|Chris, CWCipedia<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/TwoMarys</ref>}}<br />
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He then goes into a long diatribe, strongly suggesting he used a quick Google search for "research", detailing this Mary's many achievements and services to the Piedmont Virginia Community College. However, the whole article carries an insincere tone, suggesting Chris was compelled to recognize Mary as a <s>not ridiculously evil caricature</s> [[reality|real person]] as some sort of therapeutic measure.<br />
<br />
Keep in mind, however, that he doesn't acknowledge that the ''real woman'' he interacted with wasn't a horned-hat wearing witch; simply that this Mary Lee Walsh was replaced (in the ''real world'') by a good duplicate. In a very sad way, Chris seems to find it easier to rewrite reality than his own fantasy world.<br />
<br />
Mary was named on the CWCipedia Chris's first "Woman of The (ANY) Month to Respect with Authority and Kindness" for the month of August.<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Template:Christian_Says</ref><br />
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In his edited version of the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page, he clarifies that he forgave Mary Lee Walsh for her "past misdeeds", even though Chris himself was entirely at fault. According to his edits, he also hand-delivered a framed copy of his "apology" to her office, and she thanked him by telling his parents not to let their retard son on her campus anymore.<br />
<br />
Apparently, Mary didn't give a shit and Chris was crushed.<br />
<br />
{{quote|Besides which, that b**** "Dean", Mary Lee Walsh, AFTER I personally went over and handed her a Framed Hand-Drawn Apology of my angst against her, SHE SENT ME A TRESPASSING NOTICE! While my family and I did NOT accept it, and sent it back to her, I must say that is one hell of a "Thank You" for going through the trouble and gas usage to Personally Apologize and Make Peace.|Chris, Mailbag 26<ref>[[Mailbag 26]]</ref>}}<br />
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==[[:Category:Mary_Lee_Walsh|Fan art]]==<br />
Interestingly, Mary Lee Walsh in troll productions often appears as a beautiful lady with blonde hair and devil horns (and tail); this is mostly because Chris's art was so bad that his original intent for her to wear a viking helmet looked more like blonde hair. This is also due to the very great difference between Chris and the trolls' opinions about Walsh, the latter obviously preferring a much more flattering design. <br />
<br />
''[[Sonichu: The Animated Series]]'' posits that she has an extremely deep voice (similar to Dr. Girlfriend from ''The Venture Bros.''), but other than that she's still drawn with the extremely sensualized proportions seen in other troll artwork. <br />
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Mary Lee Walsh is also the actual protagonist of ''[[Sonichu Finale]]'' webcomic series. <br />
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{{collapsible<br />
|Here be DAT ASS. Mostly NSFW.<br />
|<gallery><br />
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Image:Lesath-Walsh.png<br />
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Image:Mary Lee Walsh and her world by Plombard.jpg<br />
Image:Mary Lee Walsh by churippu.JPG<br />
Image:Mary Lee Walsh by judassnogger.JPG<br />
Image:Mary Lee Walsh by The Best Sappho.jpg<br />
Image:Mary Lee Walsh Vore by Metalforever.jpg<br />
Image:Mary Xmas by Scarlet Rose.jpg<br />
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Image:Mlw.png<br />
Image:MLW attacks by Plombard.jpg<br />
Image:MLWsis.png<br />
Image:Mlwsonichu34.png<br />
Image:Mlwsonichu342.png<br />
Image:SF page 18 by Plombard.jpg<br />
Image:Sonichu by Plombard.jpg<br />
Image:Sonichu Finale cover by Plombard.jpg<br />
Image:Sonichu Finale 2 Page 23 by Plombard.jpg<br />
Image:Sonichu fanart Mary Lee Walsh by baddleebadd.jpg<br />
Image:Sonichu VS Mary Lee Walsh.jpg<br />
Image:SonichusiteMary.jpg<br />
Image:Spazkid mary lee walsh.png<br />
Image:The dean in her heaven by Plombard.png<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
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==Sauces==<br />
<references/><br />
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==See also==<br />
{{CWCipedia|chris=TwoMarys}}<br />
{{Fan art}} <br />
*[[Count Graduon]]<br />
*[[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]<br />
*[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]<br />
*[[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu]]<br />
*[[Attraction Sign]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://zabukawaii.deviantart.com/art/The-origin-of-Slaweel-146885649 Fanfiction: The origin of Slaweel]<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLCsZpcTSg0 Harry D and the PVCC girls: "Jerkop Bebob"]<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZyH5Y9SpQY Harry D's Live Drawing.]<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8dAntFOZxg CWC Sketch- MLW Pt 1]<br />
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{{Sonichu}}<br />
{{People}}<br />
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{{DEFAULTSORT:Walsh, Mary Lee}}<br />
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]<br />
[[Category:Villains]]</div>Thedarkcloud4