CWCki - User contributions [en]

List of restaurants

2012-07-28T03:32:28Z

Travis Cwckle:

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[Chris]] isn't much of a cook, nor is anyone else currently living at [[14 Branchland Court]]. When he's not eating reheated frozen dinners, he's usually chowing down at a variety of local '''restaurants'''.

== Burger King ==
{{main|Burger King}}
Chris favors McDonald's, while [[Bob]] preferred its rival Burger King. Thus, Chris usually ate here when he was out with his father.

== Chick-fil-A ==

[[Image:ChickFilA.jpg|thumb|right|Admittedly, the store might've been a [[Chris and writing|literary influence.]]]]

'''Chick-fil-A''' is a fast-food restaurant chain originating in the American south that Chris frequents, famous for its chicken sandwiches and always being closed on Sundays (due to their founder's Christian "seventh day of rest" beliefs). Reputedly one of the most 'healthy' fast food options;<ref>http://health.yahoo.com/experts/eatthis/11230/americas-bestand-worstrestaurants</ref> however, Chris has mentioned it much less often than its [[Chris and health|artery-clogging]] big brother, [[McDonald's]].

Possibly its lack of marketing campaigns aimed at children and foolish sweepstakes or [[My Coke Rewards|"reward programs"]] keep Chick-fil-A from maintaining the loyalty of creepy loitering manchildren. Thus, Chris has never been banned from a Chick-fil-A in an [[Sonichu 3#Sub-Episode 4: Christian Chandler in "McAttack"|epic showdown]] battling [[jerkops]].

Recently, Chik-fil-A has come under fire for the company founder's reputed anti-[[Homos|gay]] views and involvement in "family values" movements, which may well further endear Chris to the establishment.

===Appearances===
*Chris met up with [[Emily]] in front of the Chick-fil-A at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]]. [[Apology to Emily|Or at least tried to by calling out to the patrons (who were undoubtedly amused and perplexed)]].

*The Fashion Square Chick-fil-A was the site of one of the missed meetings between Chris and [[Surfshack Tito]]'s agents during the drama over destroying Chris's [[PS3]].

*The [[CWCville Shopping Center]] includes a lone Chick-Fil-A on the 2nd floor.
== Country Cookin ==

'''Country Cookin''' - spelled without a "G" or an apostrophe (oh, those wacky rednecks) - is [[Christian]]'s not-quite-fast-food restaurant of choice. It is a Virginia-based chain of rustic steak house/buffet and grill restaurants, akin to [[Golden Corral]], ''Roadhouse Grill'' or ''Ponderosa/Bonanza Steakhouse'' in the US, and ''Harvester'', ''Beefeater'' or ''Brewer's Fayre'' in the [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|United Kingdom]].

He has mentioned it on several occasions and even has taken his troll friend [[Joshua Martinez]] there.

===References by Chris===
* In an e-mail conversation with [[Anna McLerran]] from 2007, Chris mentioned his regular trips to the restaurant with Joshua.
* In [[Mumble 2]], Chris mentioned Country Cookin as one of his favorite restaurants.
* A Country Cookin branch is located in the [[CWCville Shopping Center]].

== Golden Corral ==

'''Golden Corral''' is an all-you-can-eat buffet chain, well-known in the American South and Midwest as ''the'' place to go for a maximum ratio of calories consumed to cash expended. Just don't think too much about where it all came from. During Chris's [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|date with Emily]], [[Bob]] mentions that he had a heart attack there while paying for the family's meal.<ref>http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Emily_Date_Conversation_Transcript#Bob.27s_health_problems_revisited_.2829:59_-_32:11.29</ref> Despite this, it was one of Chris's favorite places to eat, probably since he could [[obesity|stuff his face]] with fatty, low quality food at a [[Chris and money|low price]]. However, it is now out of business and has been replaced by a [[Chris and race|Japanese buffet]].<ref>http://www2.dailyprogress.com/news/cdp-news-local/2010/jun/11/golden_corra]l_to_close_d]oors-ar-319488/</ref>

===References by Chris===
*[[Caitlin]], a waitress Chris had a crush on for a day or so, worked at Golden Corral.
*In [[Mumble 2]], he mentioned that it's one of his favorite places to eat.
*Describing his ideal date spots in an [[IRC (18 December 2008)|IRC chat]], Chris proposed Golden Corral as a second-date destination.
*Chris's visits to the Corral with his family seem to be tightly scheduled. In a [[MySpace]] conversation from 04 September 2005, he noted that they'd be there from 3:30 to 4:45 the next day.
*Perhaps because of that precise schedule, or perhaps because he was simply overwhelmed by [[stress]], during his final [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 13|Skype conversation with BlueSpike]] Chris unexpectedly abandoned the conversation to take off for the Corral.
*In his profile at [[The Hook Cafe|''The HooK'' Cafe]] he lists it as his favorite restaurant.

==McDonald's==
{{main|McDonald's}}
Chris's cheap-and-easy fast food of choice. When he wanted to cut down on his Big Mac and McNugget intake, he stopped eating there... more than twice a week or so.

== Sheetz ==
Sheetz is a chain of gas station/mini-mart stores based in Pennsylvania with stores in five other states (including Virginia) in the United States. Among the chain's selling points is an array of fast food options.

===References by Chris===
*Chris ended [[Mumble 5]] by saying he needed to duck out to Sheetz to get his mother a sandwich.
*In the e-mail revealing the [[muscle bra]], Chris mentioned that he'd sought a job application at Sheetz.
*While chatting with [[Sarah May Skype Logs|Sarah May]] in February 2009, Chris noted a trip to Sheetz for gasoline.
*Attempting to defend his dietary choices in one of the [[Kacey Call 8|Kacey phone calls]], Chris claimed that he enjoyed fruit smoothies from Sheetz (which can easily crack 600 calories apiece).[[File:Nnocac.jpg|thumb|right|Note he ordered no [[pickles]]]]

== Sonic ==
Sonic is a drive-in fast food chain that Chris has eaten at in the past. It is coincidently the same name as our autistic hero's
[[Sonic the Hedgehog|favorite video game franchise]].
===References by Chris===
* During the [[Ohio trip]], Chris dined at Sonic's, eating a hamburger with mayonnaise, and a lemonberry slushie "made from real fruit."<ref>[[Sarah May Skype Logs]]</ref>

==References==
<references/>

{{Places}}
[[Category:Places]]
[[Category:Lists]]

Calling Out

2011-08-24T06:48:48Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-23 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

On 23 August 2011, Chris made another video calling out Jack Thaddeus once more. As the time ticks down, Chris reveals more information about him, including the fact that he was a Communist, spewing patriotic crap that would have fit in more with the [[wikipedia:McCarthy Hearings|McCarthy Hearings]] than today. Incidentally, he further proves his ignorance by [[Honor roll|confusing communism and fascism]]. Like his previous Jack Thaddeus/ADF video, it was removed for hate speech.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ofdre0Ima1A}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| next = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[Sigh|*Sigh*]] Hello again, de Internet. I have heard d- have not seen any response from Mr. Jack Thaddeus, as also he's known as Ahuvia. So therefore, I will reveal a little bit more information about him, starting with another portion of the photograph. ''[Camera pans shakily to the TV screen. It takes a moment to come into focus, revealing the upper left portion of a face, and then jerks back to Chris.]''

And, uh- let's see, what else do I have here on de stanssss... ''[Chris seems to read from something in his hands offscreen]'' He was definitely responsible for hacking my- hacking da network accounts. Probably had a ''hand'' in that blackout a few months ago. ''[A brief pause while Chris looks at his notes again]'' And, uh, he blackmailed me into humping... my c-console. And, uh, pa- he pasted the disgusting ads on da Cwcipedia... as well ''[Slurring and hissing]'' asss otherss trollin' schemess within the past couple of years. Uh, let's see...

''[Looks down again]'' Hmm...

Oh yes! ''[Looks back at camera, raises voice in a faux dramatic fashion]'' He is a communist! And we do not like communists within dis country! ''[Waves his right hand about, pointing upwards while glancing to his left]'' We are Republic, Democrat or neutral... And I am neutral, so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for ''[Raises voice and waves finger emphatically]'' COMMUNISM! We do not like to stand under one ruler. It is very unruly and... sssssssstupid! ''[Pauses and stares]''

I will give a heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' ''[In a sing-songy manner]'' Right in der Führer's face. Da da doo doo doo doo doo d'loo da doo doo doo da da ''[Chris and camera both bob enthusiastically with the tune]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Right in der Führer's face. ''[With his song finished, Chris settles the camera]''

Oh, yes, he is also a big fan of, uh- bonding... bondage, ssssadoism, machotism and disciplinary fetishisesss. And he is in the process of a sssexual change. He is going to have his... ''[Pauses, looks uncomfortable]'' wiener chopped off. I would ne'er do that, which I believe I have mentioned earlier; that is the one thing in being a tranny that I disagree on with him... And he's definitely never gonna be a female truly in that sense, in female ''[Loudly and deeply]'' dominance. He has to get a real woman to come in in order to do that. ''[Pauses again to look at his notes]''

He still lives in Pennsylvania. Still a homo. ''[With a dramatic voice like an announcer at a boxing match]'' Twennnty five years old! ''[Attempting to sing the name operatically]'' Ahuvia.

Stay tuned.

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==
Chris, still high on victory, turns his attention to [[BlueSpike]], believing him to be the cause of the prank phone calls of people shouting out "JULAAAAAAAAAAY!" and calling him [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]. His reasoning for going after BlueSpike also seemed to be more towards his condition of Asperger's and the fact that he has no job, likes big rooms and is a gamer, despite the fact that BlueSpike would be about 15-16 at the time and would be unable to really get a stable job, unlike someone we know who'd be able to get a job but doesn't want to. It too was removed from Youtube shortly after being posted.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Toht.jpg|thumb|Chris looked at the ark.]]

''[Chris puts his hand to his mouth and clears his throat.]'' JUUULAYYYYYY! JUUUULAAYY! IT'S IAN BRANDON ANDERSON! ''[He waves his hands while saying this]'' JUUULLLAY! ''[incomprehensible retarded noises here, up to...]'' Ian Brandon Anderson. JUUUUULLAYYY! *pfffffttt* ''[blows raspberry while flipping the bird]'' And that's who we are calling out next. The, uh, person who posed-pretended to be an adult woman but yet was a little, uh, little brat. Al...-he was also known as his alias Max, and Bluespike, but his real name is... ''[hits pad of paper offscreen]'' David!

And he lives in... ''[hits pad again]'' California! Don't know that much about his age, but he's at least thirteen years old. And guess what... he is confirmed to have... ''[dramatic lean forward]'' [[Aspergers_syndrome|assburgers]]! And I don't care much for aspergians, and I do not care to be associated with, erm, an... and I do not accept the ''[makes quote-marks hand gesture]'' scientific fact that [[Autism|autism]] is linked to assburgers at any time. I would quote myself as to what I said in the esstra part of [[Autism Tutorial Extra|my Little Big Planet 2 animation]], but I don't remember the words at this point.

''[picks up camera and turns around, with it facing the back of the room]''

Except that it definitely sounds like a bad cut of cow meat. And of course he was responsible for dat Julie fiasco and making me drive all the way to Cleveland, Ohioooo! And cutting up, one of the, cutting up the second medal, and ''[sounding like Popeye?] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Shoving it up my ass.]]'' And... he likes ''[dramatic gesture]'' big rooms! [[Chris and hypocrisy|And he has no job]]! And he is also a [[PS3|gamer]]. Here is a close up, featured from his photograph!

''[Chris turns the camera around to face the TV]''

''[high pitched]'' Look at his buck [[Fangs|teeth]]! ''[normal again]'' Or at least the gap between his teeth. That's a biiiig gap! Look at how big that gap is! Huh? Gap! Teeth! Buck teeth? Perhaps. But definitely a gap.

''[Chris turns the camera back towards himself while spinning around]''

And, Mr. David, you have until September 15th to come up with the apology video, and leave me and my family and my friends at peace, oh, and also in your apology video tell everyone to stop making phonecalls to me that say ''[retarded hand waving again]'' JUUULLAAAAY! JUUULLLAAAYYY! And get rid... make sure that no-one ever calls me Ian Brandon Anderson ever again, because, ''[fast]'' thatisnotmyname! ''[long pause]'' You have until September 15th. JUUUULLLLAAAY- ''[cuts out]''

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Calling Out

2011-08-24T06:46:51Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-23 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

On 23 August 2011, Chris made another video calling out Jack Thaddeus once more. As the time ticks down, Chris reveals more information about him, including the fact that he was a Communist, spewing patriotic crap that would have fit in more with the [[wikipedia:McCarthy Hearings|McCarthy Hearings]] than today. Incidentally, he further proves his ignorance by [[Honor roll|confusing communism and fascism]]. Like his previous Jack Thaddeus/ADF video, it was removed for hate speech.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ofdre0Ima1A}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| next = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[Sigh|*Sigh*]] Hello again, de Internet. I have heard d- have not seen any response from Mr. Jack Thaddeus, as also he's known as Ahuvia. So therefore, I will reveal a little bit more information about him, starting with another portion of the photograph. ''[Camera pans shakily to the TV screen. It takes a moment to come into focus, revealing the upper left portion of a face, and then jerks back to Chris.]''

And, uh- let's see, what else do I have here on de stanssss... ''[Chris seems to read from something in his hands offscreen]'' He was definitely responsible for hacking my- hacking da network accounts. Probably had a ''hand'' in that blackout a few months ago. ''[A brief pause while Chris looks at his notes again]'' And, uh, he blackmailed me into humping... my c-console. And, uh, pa- he pasted the disgusting ads on da Cwcipedia... as well ''[Slurring and hissing]'' asss otherss trollin' schemess within the past couple of years. Uh, let's see...

''[Looks down again]'' Hmm...

Oh yes! ''[Looks back at camera, raises voice in a faux dramatic fashion]'' He is a communist! And we do not like communists within dis country! [Waves his right hand about, pointing upwards while glancing to his left] We are Republic, Democrat or neutral... And I am neutral, so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for ''[Raises voice and waves finger emphatically]'' COMMUNISM! We do not like to stand under one ruler. It is very unruly and... sssssssstupid! ''[Pauses and stares]''

I will give a heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' ''[In a sing-songy manner]'' Right in der Führer's face. Da da doo doo doo doo doo d'loo da doo doo doo da da ''[Chris and camera both bob enthusiastically with the tune]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Right in der Führer's face. ''[With his song finished, Chris settles the camera]''

Oh, yes, he is also a big fan of, uh- bonding... bondage, ssssadoism, machotism and disciplinary fetishisesss. And he is in the process of a sssexual change. He is going to have his... ''[Pauses, looks uncomfortable]'' wiener chopped off. I would ne'er do that, which I believe I have mentioned earlier; that is the one thing in being a tranny that I disagree on with him... And he's definitely never gonna be a female truly in that sense, in female ''[Loudly and deeply]'' dominance. He has to get a real woman to come in in order to do that. ''[Pauses again to look at his notes]''

He still lives in Pennsylvania. Still a homo. ''[With a dramatic voice like an announcer at a boxing match]'' Twennnty five years old! ''[Attempting to sing the name operatically]'' Ahuvia.

Stay tuned.

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==
Chris, still high on victory, turns his attention to [[BlueSpike]], believing him to be the cause of the prank phone calls of people shouting out "JULAAAAAAAAAAY!" and calling him [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]. His reasoning for going after BlueSpike also seemed to be more towards his condition of Asperger's and the fact that he has no job, likes big rooms and is a gamer, despite the fact that BlueSpike would be about 15-16 at the time and would be unable to really get a stable job, unlike someone we know who'd be able to get a job but doesn't want to. It too was removed from Youtube shortly after being posted.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Toht.jpg|thumb|Chris looked at the ark.]]

''[Chris puts his hand to his mouth and clears his throat.]'' JUUULAYYYYYY! JUUUULAAYY! IT'S IAN BRANDON ANDERSON! ''[He waves his hands while saying this]'' JUUULLLAY! ''[incomprehensible retarded noises here, up to...]'' Ian Brandon Anderson. JUUUUULLAYYY! *pfffffttt* ''[blows raspberry while flipping the bird]'' And that's who we are calling out next. The, uh, person who posed-pretended to be an adult woman but yet was a little, uh, little brat. Al...-he was also known as his alias Max, and Bluespike, but his real name is... ''[hits pad of paper offscreen]'' David!

And he lives in... ''[hits pad again]'' California! Don't know that much about his age, but he's at least thirteen years old. And guess what... he is confirmed to have... ''[dramatic lean forward]'' [[Aspergers_syndrome|assburgers]]! And I don't care much for aspergians, and I do not care to be associated with, erm, an... and I do not accept the ''[makes quote-marks hand gesture]'' scientific fact that [[Autism|autism]] is linked to assburgers at any time. I would quote myself as to what I said in the esstra part of [[Autism Tutorial Extra|my Little Big Planet 2 animation]], but I don't remember the words at this point.

''[picks up camera and turns around, with it facing the back of the room]''

Except that it definitely sounds like a bad cut of cow meat. And of course he was responsible for dat Julie fiasco and making me drive all the way to Cleveland, Ohioooo! And cutting up, one of the, cutting up the second medal, and ''[sounding like Popeye?] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Shoving it up my ass.]]'' And... he likes ''[dramatic gesture]'' big rooms! [[Chris and hypocrisy|And he has no job]]! And he is also a [[PS3|gamer]]. Here is a close up, featured from his photograph!

''[Chris turns the camera around to face the TV]''

''[high pitched]'' Look at his buck [[Fangs|teeth]]! ''[normal again]'' Or at least the gap between his teeth. That's a biiiig gap! Look at how big that gap is! Huh? Gap! Teeth! Buck teeth? Perhaps. But definitely a gap.

''[Chris turns the camera back towards himself while spinning around]''

And, Mr. David, you have until September 15th to come up with the apology video, and leave me and my family and my friends at peace, oh, and also in your apology video tell everyone to stop making phonecalls to me that say ''[retarded hand waving again]'' JUUULLAAAAY! JUUULLLAAAYYY! And get rid... make sure that no-one ever calls me Ian Brandon Anderson ever again, because, ''[fast]'' thatisnotmyname! ''[long pause]'' You have until September 15th. JUUUULLLLAAAY- ''[cuts out]''

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Calling Out

2011-08-24T06:44:40Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-23 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

On 23 August 2011, Chris made another video calling out Jack Thaddeus once more. As the time ticks down, Chris reveals more information about him, including the fact that he was a Communist, spewing patriotic crap that would have fit in more with the [[wikipedia:McCarthy Hearings|McCarthy Hearings]] than today. Incidentally, he further proves his ignorance by [[Honor roll|confusing communism and fascism]]. Like his previous Jack Thaddeus/ADF video, it was removed for hate speech.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ofdre0Ima1A}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| next = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[Sigh|*Sigh*]] Hello again, de Internet. I have heard d- have not seen any response from Mr. Jack Thaddeus, as also he's known as Ahuvia. So therefore, I will reveal a little bit more information about him, starting with another portion of the photograph. ''[Camera pans shakily to the TV screen. It takes a moment to come into focus, revealing the upper left portion of a face, and then jerks back to Chris.]''

And, uh- let's see, what else do I have here on de stanssss... ''[Chris seems to read from something in his hands offscreen]'' He was defni'ly for hacking my- hacking da network accounts. Probably had a ''hand'' in that blackout a few months ago. ''[A brief pause while Chris looks at his notes again]'' And, uh, he blackmailed me into humping... my c-console. And, uh, pa- he pasted the disgusting ads on da Cwcipedia... as well ''[slurring and hissing]'' asss otherss trollin' schemess within the past couple of years. Uh, let's see...

''[Looks down again]'' Hmm...

Oh yes! ''[looks back at camera, raises voice in a faux dramatic fashion]'' He is a communist! And we do not like communists within dis country! [waves his right hand about, pointing upwards while glancing to his left] We are Republic, Democrat or neutral... And I am neutral, so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for ''[raises voice and waves finger emphatically]'' COMMUNISM! We do not like to stand under one ruler. It is very unruly and... sssssssstupid! ''[Pauses and stares]''

I will give a heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' ''[sing-songy]'' Right in der Führer's face. Da da doo doo doo doo doo d'loo da doo doo doo da da ''[Chris and camera both bob enthusiastically with the tune]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Right in der Führer's face. ''[With his song finished, Chris settles the camera]''

Oh, yes, he is also a big fan of, uh- bonding... bondage, ssssadoism, machotism and disciplinary fetishisesss. And he is in the process of a sssexual change. He is going to have his... ''[pauses, looks uncomfortable]'' wiener chopped off. I would ne'er do that, which I believe I have mentioned earlier; that is the one thing in being a tranny that I disagree on with him... And he's definitely never gonna be a female truly in that sense, in female ''[loudly and deeply]'' dominance. He has to get a real woman to come in in order to do that. ''[Pauses again to look at his notes]''

He still lives in Pennsylvania. Still a homo. ''[with a dramatic voice like an announcer at a boxing match]'' Twennnty five years old! ''[attempting to sing the name operatically]'' Ahuvia.

Stay tuned.

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==
Chris, still high on victory, turns his attention to [[BlueSpike]], believing him to be the cause of the prank phone calls of people shouting out "JULAAAAAAAAAAY!" and calling him [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]. His reasoning for going after BlueSpike also seemed to be more towards his condition of Asperger's and the fact that he has no job, likes big rooms and is a gamer, despite the fact that BlueSpike would be about 15-16 at the time and would be unable to really get a stable job, unlike someone we know who'd be able to get a job but doesn't want to. It too was removed from Youtube shortly after being posted.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Toht.jpg|thumb|Chris looked at the ark.]]

''[Chris puts his hand to his mouth and clears his throat.]'' JUUULAYYYYYY! JUUUULAAYY! IT'S IAN BRANDON ANDERSON! ''[He waves his hands while saying this]'' JUUULLLAY! ''[incomprehensible retarded noises here, up to...]'' Ian Brandon Anderson. JUUUUULLAYYY! *pfffffttt* ''[blows raspberry while flipping the bird]'' And that's who we are calling out next. The, uh, person who posed-pretended to be an adult woman but yet was a little, uh, little brat. Al...-he was also known as his alias Max, and Bluespike, but his real name is... ''[hits pad of paper offscreen]'' David!

And he lives in... ''[hits pad again]'' California! Don't know that much about his age, but he's at least thirteen years old. And guess what... he is confirmed to have... ''[dramatic lean forward]'' [[Aspergers_syndrome|assburgers]]! And I don't care much for aspergians, and I do not care to be associated with, erm, an... and I do not accept the ''[makes quote-marks hand gesture]'' scientific fact that [[Autism|autism]] is linked to assburgers at any time. I would quote myself as to what I said in the esstra part of [[Autism Tutorial Extra|my Little Big Planet 2 animation]], but I don't remember the words at this point.

''[picks up camera and turns around, with it facing the back of the room]''

Except that it definitely sounds like a bad cut of cow meat. And of course he was responsible for dat Julie fiasco and making me drive all the way to Cleveland, Ohioooo! And cutting up, one of the, cutting up the second medal, and ''[sounding like Popeye?] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Shoving it up my ass.]]'' And... he likes ''[dramatic gesture]'' big rooms! [[Chris and hypocrisy|And he has no job]]! And he is also a [[PS3|gamer]]. Here is a close up, featured from his photograph!

''[Chris turns the camera around to face the TV]''

''[high pitched]'' Look at his buck [[Fangs|teeth]]! ''[normal again]'' Or at least the gap between his teeth. That's a biiiig gap! Look at how big that gap is! Huh? Gap! Teeth! Buck teeth? Perhaps. But definitely a gap.

''[Chris turns the camera back towards himself while spinning around]''

And, Mr. David, you have until September 15th to come up with the apology video, and leave me and my family and my friends at peace, oh, and also in your apology video tell everyone to stop making phonecalls to me that say ''[retarded hand waving again]'' JUUULLAAAAY! JUUULLLAAAYYY! And get rid... make sure that no-one ever calls me Ian Brandon Anderson ever again, because, ''[fast]'' thatisnotmyname! ''[long pause]'' You have until September 15th. JUUUULLLLAAAY- ''[cuts out]''

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Calling Out

2011-08-24T06:44:17Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-23 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

On 23 August 2011, Chris made another video calling out Jack Thaddeus once more. As the time ticks down, Chris reveals more information about him, including the fact that he was a Communist, spewing patriotic crap that would have fit in more with the [[wikipedia:McCarthy Hearings|McCarthy Hearings]] than today. Incidentally, he further proves his ignorance by [[Honor roll|confusing communism and fascism]]. Like his previous Jack Thaddeus/ADF video, it was removed for hate speech.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ofdre0Ima1A}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| next = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[Sigh|*Sigh*]] Hello again, de Internet. I have heard d- have not seen any response from Mr. Jack Thaddeus, as also he's known as Ahuvia. So therefore, I will reveal a little bit more information about him, starting with another portion of the photograph. ''[Camera pans shakily to the TV screen. It takes a moment to come into focus, revealing the upper left portion of a face, and then jerks back to Chris.]''

And, uh- let's see, what else do I have here on de stanssss... ''[Chris seems to read frin something in his hands offscreen]'' He was defni'ly for hacking my- hacking da network accounts. Probably had a ''hand'' in that blackout a few months ago. ''[A brief pause while Chris looks at his notes again]'' And, uh, he blackmailed me into humping... my c-console. And, uh, pa- he pasted the disgusting ads on da Cwcipedia... as well ''[slurring and hissing]'' asss otherss trollin' schemess within the past couple of years. Uh, let's see...

''[Looks down again]'' Hmm...

Oh yes! ''[looks back at camera, raises voice in a faux dramatic fashion]'' He is a communist! And we do not like communists within dis country! [waves his right hand about, pointing upwards while glancing to his left] We are Republic, Democrat or neutral... And I am neutral, so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for ''[raises voice and waves finger emphatically]'' COMMUNISM! We do not like to stand under one ruler. It is very unruly and... sssssssstupid! ''[Pauses and stares]''

I will give a heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' ''[sing-songy]'' Right in der Führer's face. Da da doo doo doo doo doo d'loo da doo doo doo da da ''[Chris and camera both bob enthusiastically with the tune]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Right in der Führer's face. ''[With his song finished, Chris settles the camera]''

Oh, yes, he is also a big fan of, uh- bonding... bondage, ssssadoism, machotism and disciplinary fetishisesss. And he is in the process of a sssexual change. He is going to have his... ''[pauses, looks uncomfortable]'' wiener chopped off. I would ne'er do that, which I believe I have mentioned earlier; that is the one thing in being a tranny that I disagree on with him... And he's definitely never gonna be a female truly in that sense, in female ''[loudly and deeply]'' dominance. He has to get a real woman to come in in order to do that. ''[Pauses again to look at his notes]''

He still lives in Pennsylvania. Still a homo. ''[with a dramatic voice like an announcer at a boxing match]'' Twennnty five years old! ''[attempting to sing the name operatically]'' Ahuvia.

Stay tuned.

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==
Chris, still high on victory, turns his attention to [[BlueSpike]], believing him to be the cause of the prank phone calls of people shouting out "JULAAAAAAAAAAY!" and calling him [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]. His reasoning for going after BlueSpike also seemed to be more towards his condition of Asperger's and the fact that he has no job, likes big rooms and is a gamer, despite the fact that BlueSpike would be about 15-16 at the time and would be unable to really get a stable job, unlike someone we know who'd be able to get a job but doesn't want to. It too was removed from Youtube shortly after being posted.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Toht.jpg|thumb|Chris looked at the ark.]]

''[Chris puts his hand to his mouth and clears his throat.]'' JUUULAYYYYYY! JUUUULAAYY! IT'S IAN BRANDON ANDERSON! ''[He waves his hands while saying this]'' JUUULLLAY! ''[incomprehensible retarded noises here, up to...]'' Ian Brandon Anderson. JUUUUULLAYYY! *pfffffttt* ''[blows raspberry while flipping the bird]'' And that's who we are calling out next. The, uh, person who posed-pretended to be an adult woman but yet was a little, uh, little brat. Al...-he was also known as his alias Max, and Bluespike, but his real name is... ''[hits pad of paper offscreen]'' David!

And he lives in... ''[hits pad again]'' California! Don't know that much about his age, but he's at least thirteen years old. And guess what... he is confirmed to have... ''[dramatic lean forward]'' [[Aspergers_syndrome|assburgers]]! And I don't care much for aspergians, and I do not care to be associated with, erm, an... and I do not accept the ''[makes quote-marks hand gesture]'' scientific fact that [[Autism|autism]] is linked to assburgers at any time. I would quote myself as to what I said in the esstra part of [[Autism Tutorial Extra|my Little Big Planet 2 animation]], but I don't remember the words at this point.

''[picks up camera and turns around, with it facing the back of the room]''

Except that it definitely sounds like a bad cut of cow meat. And of course he was responsible for dat Julie fiasco and making me drive all the way to Cleveland, Ohioooo! And cutting up, one of the, cutting up the second medal, and ''[sounding like Popeye?] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Shoving it up my ass.]]'' And... he likes ''[dramatic gesture]'' big rooms! [[Chris and hypocrisy|And he has no job]]! And he is also a [[PS3|gamer]]. Here is a close up, featured from his photograph!

''[Chris turns the camera around to face the TV]''

''[high pitched]'' Look at his buck [[Fangs|teeth]]! ''[normal again]'' Or at least the gap between his teeth. That's a biiiig gap! Look at how big that gap is! Huh? Gap! Teeth! Buck teeth? Perhaps. But definitely a gap.

''[Chris turns the camera back towards himself while spinning around]''

And, Mr. David, you have until September 15th to come up with the apology video, and leave me and my family and my friends at peace, oh, and also in your apology video tell everyone to stop making phonecalls to me that say ''[retarded hand waving again]'' JUUULLAAAAY! JUUULLLAAAYYY! And get rid... make sure that no-one ever calls me Ian Brandon Anderson ever again, because, ''[fast]'' thatisnotmyname! ''[long pause]'' You have until September 15th. JUUUULLLLAAAY- ''[cuts out]''

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Calling Out

2011-08-24T06:43:50Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-23 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

On 23 August 2011, Chris made another video calling out Jack Thaddeus once more. As the time ticks down, Chris reveals more information about him, including the fact that he was a Communist, spewing patriotic crap that would have fit in more with the [[wikipedia:McCarthy Hearings|McCarthy Hearings]] than today. Incidentally, he further proves his ignorance by [[Honor roll|confusing communism and fascism]]. Like his previous Jack Thaddeus/ADF video, it was removed for hate speech.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ofdre0Ima1A}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| next = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[Sigh|*Sigh*]] Hello again, de Internet. I have heard d- have not seen any response from Mr. Jack Thaddeus, as also he's known as Ahuvia. So therefore, I will reveal a little bit more information about him, starting with another portion of the photograph. ''[Camera pans shakily to the TV screen. It takes a moment to come into focus, revealing the upper left portion of a face, and then jerks back to Chris.]''

And, uh- let's see, what else do I have here on de stanssss... ''[Chris seems to read frin something in his hands offscreen]'' He was defni'ly for hacking my- hacking da network accounts. Probably had a ''hand'' in that blackout a few months ago. ''[A brief pause while Chris looks at his notes again]'' And, uh, he blackmailed me into humping... my c-console. And, uh, pa- he pasted the disgusting ads on da Cwcipedia... as well ''[slurring and hissing]'' asss otherss trollin' schemess within the past couple of years. Uh, let's see...

[Looks down again] Hmm...

Oh yes! ''[looks back at camera, raises voice in a faux dramatic fashion]'' He is a communist! And we do not like communists within dis country! [waves his right hand about, pointing upwards while glancing to his left] We are Republic, Democrat or neutral... And I am neutral, so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for ''[raises voice and waves finger emphatically]'' COMMUNISM! We do not like to stand under one ruler. It is very unruly and... sssssssstupid! ''[Pauses and stares]''

I will give a heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' ''[sing-songy]'' Right in der Führer's face. Da da doo doo doo doo doo d'loo da doo doo doo da da ''[Chris and camera both bob enthusiastically with the tune]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Heil! ''[raspberry]'' Right in der Führer's face. ''[With his song finished, Chris settles the camera]''

Oh, yes, he is also a big fan of, uh- bonding... bondage, ssssadoism, machotism and disciplinary fetishisesss. And he is in the process of a sssexual change. He is going to have his... ''[pauses, looks uncomfortable]'' wiener chopped off. I would ne'er do that, which I believe I have mentioned earlier; that is the one thing in being a tranny that I disagree on with him... And he's definitely never gonna be a female truly in that sense, in female ''[loudly and deeply]'' 'dominance'. He has to get a real woman to come in in order to do that. ''[Pauses again to look at his notes]''

He still lives in Pennsylvania. Still a homo. ''[with a dramatic voice like an announcer at a boxing match]'' Twennnty five years old! ''[attempting to sing the name operatically]'' Ahuvia.

Stay tuned.

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==
Chris, still high on victory, turns his attention to [[BlueSpike]], believing him to be the cause of the prank phone calls of people shouting out "JULAAAAAAAAAAY!" and calling him [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]. His reasoning for going after BlueSpike also seemed to be more towards his condition of Asperger's and the fact that he has no job, likes big rooms and is a gamer, despite the fact that BlueSpike would be about 15-16 at the time and would be unable to really get a stable job, unlike someone we know who'd be able to get a job but doesn't want to. It too was removed from Youtube shortly after being posted.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Toht.jpg|thumb|Chris looked at the ark.]]

''[Chris puts his hand to his mouth and clears his throat.]'' JUUULAYYYYYY! JUUUULAAYY! IT'S IAN BRANDON ANDERSON! ''[He waves his hands while saying this]'' JUUULLLAY! ''[incomprehensible retarded noises here, up to...]'' Ian Brandon Anderson. JUUUUULLAYYY! *pfffffttt* ''[blows raspberry while flipping the bird]'' And that's who we are calling out next. The, uh, person who posed-pretended to be an adult woman but yet was a little, uh, little brat. Al...-he was also known as his alias Max, and Bluespike, but his real name is... ''[hits pad of paper offscreen]'' David!

And he lives in... ''[hits pad again]'' California! Don't know that much about his age, but he's at least thirteen years old. And guess what... he is confirmed to have... ''[dramatic lean forward]'' [[Aspergers_syndrome|assburgers]]! And I don't care much for aspergians, and I do not care to be associated with, erm, an... and I do not accept the ''[makes quote-marks hand gesture]'' scientific fact that [[Autism|autism]] is linked to assburgers at any time. I would quote myself as to what I said in the esstra part of [[Autism Tutorial Extra|my Little Big Planet 2 animation]], but I don't remember the words at this point.

''[picks up camera and turns around, with it facing the back of the room]''

Except that it definitely sounds like a bad cut of cow meat. And of course he was responsible for dat Julie fiasco and making me drive all the way to Cleveland, Ohioooo! And cutting up, one of the, cutting up the second medal, and ''[sounding like Popeye?] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Shoving it up my ass.]]'' And... he likes ''[dramatic gesture]'' big rooms! [[Chris and hypocrisy|And he has no job]]! And he is also a [[PS3|gamer]]. Here is a close up, featured from his photograph!

''[Chris turns the camera around to face the TV]''

''[high pitched]'' Look at his buck [[Fangs|teeth]]! ''[normal again]'' Or at least the gap between his teeth. That's a biiiig gap! Look at how big that gap is! Huh? Gap! Teeth! Buck teeth? Perhaps. But definitely a gap.

''[Chris turns the camera back towards himself while spinning around]''

And, Mr. David, you have until September 15th to come up with the apology video, and leave me and my family and my friends at peace, oh, and also in your apology video tell everyone to stop making phonecalls to me that say ''[retarded hand waving again]'' JUUULLAAAAY! JUUULLLAAAYYY! And get rid... make sure that no-one ever calls me Ian Brandon Anderson ever again, because, ''[fast]'' thatisnotmyname! ''[long pause]'' You have until September 15th. JUUUULLLLAAAY- ''[cuts out]''

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Calling Out

2011-08-24T06:40:45Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-23 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

On 23 August 2011, Chris made another video calling out Jack Thaddeus once more. As the time ticks down, Chris reveals more information about him, including the fact that he was a Communist, spewing patriotic crap that would have fit in more with the [[wikipedia:McCarthy Hearings|McCarthy Hearings]] than today. Incidentally, he further proves his ignorance by [[Honor roll|confusing communism and fascism]]. Like his previous Jack Thaddeus/ADF video, it was removed for hate speech.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ofdre0Ima1A}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| next = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[Sigh|*Sigh*]] Hello again, de Internet. I have heard d- have not seen any response from Mr. Jack Thaddeus, as also he's known as Ahuvia. So therefore, I will reveal a little bit more information about him, starting with another portion of the photograph. [Camera pans shakily to the TV screen. It takes a moment to come into focus, revealing the upper left portion of a face, and then jerks back to Chris.]

And, uh- let's see, what else do I have here on de stanssss... [Chris seems to read frin something in his hands offscreen] He was defni'ly for hacking my- hacking da network accounts. Probably had a [i]hand[/i] in that blackout a few months ago. [A brief pause while Chris looks at his notes again] And, uh, he blackmailed me into humping... my c-console. And, uh, pa- he pasted the disgusting ads on da Cwcipedia... as well [slurring and hissing S's] asss otherss trollin' schemess within the past couple of years. Uh, let's see...

[Looks down again] Hmm...

Oh yes! [looks back at camera, raises voice in a faux dramatic fashion] He is a communist! And we do not like communists within dis country! [waves his right hand about, pointing upwards while glancing to his left] We are Republic, Democrat or neutral... And I am neutral, so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for [raises voice and waves finger emphatically] COMMUNISM! We do not like to stand under one ruler. It is very unruly and... sssssssstupid! [Pauses and starers]

I will give a heil! [raspberry] Heil! [raspberry] [sing-songy] Right in der Führer's face. Da da doo doo doo doo doo d'loo da doo doo doo da da [Chris and camera both bob enthusiastically with the tune] Heil! [raspberry] Heil! [raspberry] Right in der Führer's face. [With his song finished, Chris settles the camera]]

Oh, yes, he is also a big fan of, uh- bonding... bondage, ssssadoism, machotism and disciplinary fetishisesss. And he is in the process of a sssexual change. He is going to have his... [pauses, looks uncomfortable] weiner chopped off. I would ne'er do that, which I believe I have mentioned earlier; that is the one thing in being a tranny that I disagree on with him... And he's definitely never gonna be a female truly in that sense, in female [loudly and deeply] [b]dominance[/b]. He has to get a real woman to come in in order to do that. [Pauses again to look at his notes]

He still lives in Pennsylvania. Still a homo. [with a dramatic voice like an announcer at a boxing match] Twennnty five years old! [attempting to sing the name operatically] Ahuvia.

Stay tuned.

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==
Chris, still high on victory, turns his attention to [[BlueSpike]], believing him to be the cause of the prank phone calls of people shouting out "JULAAAAAAAAAAY!" and calling him [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]. His reasoning for going after BlueSpike also seemed to be more towards his condition of Asperger's and the fact that he has no job, likes big rooms and is a gamer, despite the fact that BlueSpike would be about 15-16 at the time and would be unable to really get a stable job, unlike someone we know who'd be able to get a job but doesn't want to. It too was removed from Youtube shortly after being posted.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Toht.jpg|thumb|Chris looked at the ark.]]

''[Chris puts his hand to his mouth and clears his throat.]'' JUUULAYYYYYY! JUUUULAAYY! IT'S IAN BRANDON ANDERSON! ''[He waves his hands while saying this]'' JUUULLLAY! ''[incomprehensible retarded noises here, up to...]'' Ian Brandon Anderson. JUUUUULLAYYY! *pfffffttt* ''[blows raspberry while flipping the bird]'' And that's who we are calling out next. The, uh, person who posed-pretended to be an adult woman but yet was a little, uh, little brat. Al...-he was also known as his alias Max, and Bluespike, but his real name is... ''[hits pad of paper offscreen]'' David!

And he lives in... ''[hits pad again]'' California! Don't know that much about his age, but he's at least thirteen years old. And guess what... he is confirmed to have... ''[dramatic lean forward]'' [[Aspergers_syndrome|assburgers]]! And I don't care much for aspergians, and I do not care to be associated with, erm, an... and I do not accept the ''[makes quote-marks hand gesture]'' scientific fact that [[Autism|autism]] is linked to assburgers at any time. I would quote myself as to what I said in the esstra part of [[Autism Tutorial Extra|my Little Big Planet 2 animation]], but I don't remember the words at this point.

''[picks up camera and turns around, with it facing the back of the room]''

Except that it definitely sounds like a bad cut of cow meat. And of course he was responsible for dat Julie fiasco and making me drive all the way to Cleveland, Ohioooo! And cutting up, one of the, cutting up the second medal, and ''[sounding like Popeye?] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Shoving it up my ass.]]'' And... he likes ''[dramatic gesture]'' big rooms! [[Chris and hypocrisy|And he has no job]]! And he is also a [[PS3|gamer]]. Here is a close up, featured from his photograph!

''[Chris turns the camera around to face the TV]''

''[high pitched]'' Look at his buck [[Fangs|teeth]]! ''[normal again]'' Or at least the gap between his teeth. That's a biiiig gap! Look at how big that gap is! Huh? Gap! Teeth! Buck teeth? Perhaps. But definitely a gap.

''[Chris turns the camera back towards himself while spinning around]''

And, Mr. David, you have until September 15th to come up with the apology video, and leave me and my family and my friends at peace, oh, and also in your apology video tell everyone to stop making phonecalls to me that say ''[retarded hand waving again]'' JUUULLAAAAY! JUUULLLAAAYYY! And get rid... make sure that no-one ever calls me Ian Brandon Anderson ever again, because, ''[fast]'' thatisnotmyname! ''[long pause]'' You have until September 15th. JUUUULLLLAAAY- ''[cuts out]''

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Calling Out

2011-08-24T06:40:16Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-23 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

On 23 August 2011, Chris made another video calling out Jack Thaddeus once more. As the time ticks down, Chris reveals more information about him, including the fact that he was a Communist, spewing patriotic crap that would have fit in more with the [[wikipedia:McCarthy Hearings|McCarthy Hearings]] than today. Incidentally, he further proves his ignorance by [[Honor roll|confusing communism and fascism]]. Like his previous Jack Thaddeus/ADF video, it was removed for hate speech.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ofdre0Ima1A}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| next = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

{{Transcription}}

[[Sigh|*Sigh*]] Hello again, de Internet. I have heard d- have not seen any response from Mr. Jack Thaddeus, as also he's known as Ahuvia. So therefore, I will reveal a little bit more information about him, starting with another portion of the photograph. [Camera pans shakily to the TV screen. It takes a moment to come into focus, revealing the upper left portion of a face, and then jerks back to Chris.]

And, uh- let's see, what else do I have here on de stanssss... [Chris seems to read frin something in his hands offscreen] He was defni'ly for hacking my- hacking da network accounts. Probably had a [i]hand[/i] in that blackout a few months ago. [A brief pause while Chris looks at his notes again] And, uh, he blackmailed me into humping... my c-console. And, uh, pa- he pasted the disgusting ads on da Cwcipedia... as well [slurring and hissing S's] asss otherss trollin' schemess within the past couple of years. Uh, let's see...

[Looks down again] Hmm...

Oh yes! [looks back at camera, raises voice in a faux dramatic fashion] He is a communist! And we do not like communists within dis country! [waves his right hand about, pointing upwards while glancing to his left] We are Republic, Democrat or neutral... And I am neutral, so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for [raises voice and waves finger emphatically] COMMUNISM! We do not like to stand under one ruler. It is very unruly and... sssssssstupid! [Pauses and starers]

I will give a heil! [raspberry] Heil! [raspberry] [sing-songy] Right in der Führer's face. Da da doo doo doo doo doo d'loo da doo doo doo da da [Chris and camera both bob enthusiastically with the tune] Heil! [raspberry] Heil! [raspberry] Right in der Führer's face. [With his song finished, Chris settles the camera]]

Oh, yes, he is also a big fan of, uh- bonding... bondage, ssssadoism, machotism and disciplinary fetishisesss. And he is in the process of a sssexual change. He is going to have his... [pauses, looks uncomfortable] weiner chopped off. I would ne'er do that, which I believe I have mentioned earlier; that is the one thing in being a tranny that I disagree on with him... And he's definitely never gonna be a female truly in that sense, in female [loudly and deeply] [b]dominance[/b]. He has to get a real woman to come in in order to do that. [Pauses again to look at his notes]

He still lives in Pennsylvania. Still a homo. [with a dramatic voice like an announcer at a boxing match] Twennnty five years old! [attempting to sing the name operatically] Ahuvia.

Stay tuned.

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==
Chris, still high on victory, turns his attention to [[BlueSpike]], believing him to be the cause of the prank phone calls of people shouting out "JULAAAAAAAAAAY!" and calling him [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]. His reasoning for going after BlueSpike also seemed to be more towards his condition of Asperger's and the fact that he has no job, likes big rooms and is a gamer, despite the fact that BlueSpike would be about 15-16 at the time and would be unable to really get a stable job, unlike someone we know who'd be able to get a job but doesn't want to. It too was removed from Youtube shortly after being posted.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Toht.jpg|thumb|Chris looked at the ark.]]

''[Chris puts his hand to his mouth and clears his throat.]'' JUUULAYYYYYY! JUUUULAAYY! IT'S IAN BRANDON ANDERSON! ''[He waves his hands while saying this]'' JUUULLLAY! ''[incomprehensible retarded noises here, up to...]'' Ian Brandon Anderson. JUUUUULLAYYY! *pfffffttt* ''[blows raspberry while flipping the bird]'' And that's who we are calling out next. The, uh, person who posed-pretended to be an adult woman but yet was a little, uh, little brat. Al...-he was also known as his alias Max, and Bluespike, but his real name is... ''[hits pad of paper offscreen]'' David!

And he lives in... ''[hits pad again]'' California! Don't know that much about his age, but he's at least thirteen years old. And guess what... he is confirmed to have... ''[dramatic lean forward]'' [[Aspergers_syndrome|assburgers]]! And I don't care much for aspergians, and I do not care to be associated with, erm, an... and I do not accept the ''[makes quote-marks hand gesture]'' scientific fact that [[Autism|autism]] is linked to assburgers at any time. I would quote myself as to what I said in the esstra part of [[Autism Tutorial Extra|my Little Big Planet 2 animation]], but I don't remember the words at this point.

''[picks up camera and turns around, with it facing the back of the room]''

Except that it definitely sounds like a bad cut of cow meat. And of course he was responsible for dat Julie fiasco and making me drive all the way to Cleveland, Ohioooo! And cutting up, one of the, cutting up the second medal, and ''[sounding like Popeye?] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Shoving it up my ass.]]'' And... he likes ''[dramatic gesture]'' big rooms! [[Chris and hypocrisy|And he has no job]]! And he is also a [[PS3|gamer]]. Here is a close up, featured from his photograph!

''[Chris turns the camera around to face the TV]''

''[high pitched]'' Look at his buck [[Fangs|teeth]]! ''[normal again]'' Or at least the gap between his teeth. That's a biiiig gap! Look at how big that gap is! Huh? Gap! Teeth! Buck teeth? Perhaps. But definitely a gap.

''[Chris turns the camera back towards himself while spinning around]''

And, Mr. David, you have until September 15th to come up with the apology video, and leave me and my family and my friends at peace, oh, and also in your apology video tell everyone to stop making phonecalls to me that say ''[retarded hand waving again]'' JUUULLAAAAY! JUUULLLAAAYYY! And get rid... make sure that no-one ever calls me Ian Brandon Anderson ever again, because, ''[fast]'' thatisnotmyname! ''[long pause]'' You have until September 15th. JUUUULLLLAAAY- ''[cuts out]''

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Calling Out

2011-08-24T05:15:17Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David */

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded between 6-23 [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, [[Barbara|Cloverfield]]-like viewing experience.

== Calling Out "Tito" - Don ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2461''', Chris announces his return to the [[Internet]]. He claims to have information regarding the true identity of various trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito]] (aka "Don"). After briefly showing viewers a fragment of a photograph of what he claims is the real Tito, Chris lists his demands to prevent the release of the full photo and, presumably, other revealing documents.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Tito" - Don
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gDuIfwZbN3c}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Rumors|text}}, {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[100 2357.MOV]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Easily trolled by annnyooooneee.jpg|thumb|"... They could be easily trolled back by aaanyone." Intimidated?]]
[''Looks at camera with an emotionless face, and then jerks the camera to his right'']

Attention, citizens of the internet. I am making a return. [[Chris and Ego|Y'all should know me by now]], if in case if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of [[Sonichu|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu|Rosechu]] and the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon|electric hedgehog Pokemon]]. Firstly, upon that note, I would like to inform everyone that it was originally meant to be a [[My Little Pony|TV-Y7 rated... friendship socializing, promoting type of series]]... it is not meant to be taken otherwise in [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|any adulterous forms]].

[''Jerks camera around more'']

And with that, I will now continue with why I am making my return. I am ready to initiate [[Chris and negotiation|negotiations]] and paybacksss with the trolls, some cyberbullies that have been defiling me within the past five years... in the past four years. Firstly, I would like to make it well known that I have ''information'' of such trolls and cyberbullies if at that point if I release them, they could be easily trolled back by aaanyone. And, the first [[Chris and English|among chopping block]] I would like to ensue, [[Surfshack Tito|'''Surfshack Tito''']]... or should I day, Don in Michigan! And I'm not saying that he's a total [[Obesity|fat person]], but [[Random Access Humor|he would make the really big Buddha look like a supermodel in comparison]]. In fact, with his looks, he could be a [[Inos|Rasta]] Buddha! And I show you only a fragment of the [[speech impediment|pho-to-graph]]. [''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now, DON. Let's talk business. If you do not want me to review- reveal the entire pho-to-graph, or any of the remainder of your information of which I have upon my possession, [[Chris and negotiation|YOU WILL FOLLOW MY DEMANDS]]! And they are listed as such....

I want you to come forward with- come forward with your participation in, uh, [[PlayStation Network]] hackings... directly to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment America and Sony Computer Entertainment Japan with a ''live video'', unaltered, ay, uh--slightly altered, you MAY blur your face. That is the only option that you get: Blurring your face. You will apologize to... Sony and [[Chris and english|mess up]] for hacking into the PlayStation Network at all, [[Chris and Reality|'cause I know you are responsible for that]].

And also, I would you to, in that- within that same video, or in a separate video, apologize directly to my [[Gal pal|ex-girlfriend]] Heather and her family. You may even call them up on the telephone that you are the one among which responsibole for pretending to be me... and stopping that relationship between us, 'cause I would like to have peace between my... past friends, because I don't like there to be bad things or [[Megan|ill tidings]] between people. ''(Pauses)'' And I know it was partially my fault, too, on that, by the way, within that relationship breakup.

But anyway, moving on with my demands, I would like- also like you to set to-send me via U.S. Mail, ''ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS CASH''. American. Unmarked billssss, snail-mailed to my home address, in a long, small white... envelope, with YOUR home address clearly, legibly, hand writ-ten on the envelope in the return area. Next, I want you to remove ''ALL'' of the -cre-''ALL'' of the pages on the website known as the [[CWCki]] that have originally came from you that you have started. Also, as well as all contributions you have to any other pages as well. And lastly, from this point, after you have done these things, I would like you, ''Don'' of ''Michigan'', to leave me, my life, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my [[SonichuBabies|friends]] ''alone''. To be, for the rest of our lives, in peace.

I leave that up to you [[Speech Impediment|Surussshack Tito]]. Expect another video in the near fu- in the near future of another troll that I am well aware of. Thank you.

== Tito's official response ==
In a clear attempt to meet Chris's demands, Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.
==== Video ====
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Tito's official response to Chris
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| maker = Surfshack Tito
| subject = Response to Chris's Demands
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
}}
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}

===== Transcript =====
Heh, hey, little cuz, uh, or, uh, [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the [[Navy|potato salad]] this time; you caught me, cuz. I- I admit it. I sold the security files of [[Sony|Sony]] to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars, and the interest! Just don't- just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore, man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your [[Niggos|slave]] for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me, I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and-and-and- and don't let me down. I won't let you down.

== Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, Chris calls out Thorg (aka "Jeremy", aka [[CWCki]] user [[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]]) and again sets out his demands to prevent the release of a full photograph and revealing documents. Despite his interest in [[Tomgirl|appearing and acting like a woman]], Chris demands that Thorg let the people of New York City know that he likes [[China|China]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6Fh0p9WXRDc}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]
| next = [[#Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"|Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}

===Transcript===
Hello, once again, the Internet! I have returned with another troll, cyberbull-y, that I am ware- aware of who he is in real life. I br- I called to your attention Master Thorg, T-H-O-R-G, or as he [is] known in real life, Jeremy, within Canada.

He is a pizza-faced [[Chris and Religion|atheist]]. You can find him possibly in a video game store. I leave the specifics disclosed at this time. And, here is a sample of ''his'' [[Speech Impediment|pho-to-graph]].

[''Chris points the camera to the television showing half the face of a man. He then returns the camera to him.'']

Now, Jeremy, let's you and I [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|talk business]] now. My demands are as follows:

Because I know and well awa- and I [am] well aware that you have Photoshopped me into that damned [[:File:Gaybar.png|gay bar]] and uploaded it- have it- you had it uploaded upon the [[20_December_2009#One_of_these_things_is_not_like_the_others|billboards]] in New York City within some time ago. I would like you to make a public apology with your face, you may blur your face out as well, but I would like the statement to follow it:

"That you are- that it is a correction that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am [[Homos|STRAIGHT]], and I have never ever been in a damned gay bar ''ever.''"

And I want that uploaded among the New York City billboards, and I want them left up there for one whole week, from one Sunday to the following Saturday. One, whole, week. Seven. days.

And that I- and also within the statements I would like you to know that I, Christian Weston Chandler, am an [[Chris and anger|all-around good-natured person]], and that I am to be treated and respected as a normal person. I am not a bad person; I do not like to be treated or thought of as a bad person, as I have been made out to be within the [[Trolls|trolls]], including yourself, Jeremy, within your [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|smearing]] and hate campaigns of my name.

My next demand: I would like you to remove all of your pages as well from the CWCki, including every last page and image that you have put up there talking about the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia|Tomboy/Tomgirl forum of Virginia]]. Remove them all, as well as your contributions to any pages. And then beyond that after having completed all that, I would like you as well to leave me, my life, my family, and my friends, alone, and at peace, to live our lives respectively as well. I'll leave you all with that. Stay tuned for another revealed troll... or slightly revealed, as I am ON THE PAYBACK! [''laughs maniacally'']

I win.

== Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg" ==
In this short video, Chris sets a deadline for Don and Jeremy to meet his demands, lest [[jerkops|the authorities]] intervene: 31 August, 2011.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mP4wwvCSS7U}}
| stardate = 6 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[#Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Jerks around the camera and makes a wide-eyed, blank face'']

I almost forgot. Between Don and Jeremy, also known as Suresack- [[Surfshack Tito|Surfshack Tito]] and Thorg, my demands, I would like them met before August 31st, 2011, the end of this month. And if my demands are not met before then, I'm gonna reveal your respective real life photographs as well as the rest of the personal information of you two in the- respectively, that I have within my possession. And then you two will b- each be trolled by your own trolls, and the [[Jerkops|police]] will catch up with you.

So, each of you. Meet my demands. Before August 31st... 2011.

[''Fumbles with the camera again, [[Chris and cinematography|almost dropping it]]'']

== Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher ==
Three days later, Chris posted a fourth video, calling out [[Alec Benson Leary]]. He's dropped the request for money and billboards, but now demands that Alec, Tito and Thorg [[Chris and hypocrisy|leave the Internet]]. He later delivers tirade concerning the [[GAMe PLACe]] and its owner, which culminates in accusing [[Michael Snyder]] of being a child molester. Chris's [[speech impediment|poor speaking skills]] are quite prevalent in this video, as he repeats the words "essentially" and "associated" numerous times. He also manages to repeat the ever-classic "My mommy- my family" line from one of his [[For My Sweetest Ivy|videos for Ivy]].

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher
| video = {{#ev:youtube|WN72luEx708}}
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[#Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| next = [[It's not that cold]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Hello, again, once again. I am here to make another [[trolls|troll]] [[speech impediment|esspos]]e as I have found anudder one amongst the bunch... the bunches! The one called [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Learec- Leary]] is not who he appears to be, and certainly is NOT an original creator of [[Asperchu|Asperchu]]. In fact, he is not even [[Aspergers|AsPERGIAN]]! He does not have Aspergers, and he’s another [[Chris|fatty]] [[Barbara|fat]] [[Robert Chandler|fat]] [[Sammy|fat]] [[Hambeast|fat]]... [[Desi|fat]]. Aaand just le—and I do NOT have a script. I have notes.

[''Holds up a piece of lined paper and a piece of red construction paper'']

I have notes and I form my own script. Anyway, he also has ties with the, uh, [[The GAMe PLACe|Game and Hobby]] place of which he makes donaations, of wid- which I have another esspose about the Game Place. First, here is his closeup.

[''Turns camera towards his television, showing part of a man's face.'']

Now let’s talk... oh yeah, his real name is Christopher. So, [[Homos|Cha-ris]], let’s talk business now. What I would like from you… is essentially a live video apology for all the wrongs you have done to me over the [[Internet|innernet]] including the [[Chris and Copyright|copyright infringement on my Sonichu]] with your CHEAP, poor excuse for a 9-year-old... Asperchu, you immature [[JERKS|jerk]]! And then, I want you to leave the internet for good, and leave me and [[For My Sweetest Ivy|my mom—and my family]]... and friends at peace.

Also, on that note, I wish to make a correction to my demands with [[Surfshack Tito|Don]] and Jeremy. Essentially I have lear- Essentially I have learned from my esteemed colleague associates that [[Chris and the Law|apparently it is extortion]] to request [[Spanish|mucho dinero]], plus the billboard is no longer in effect. So therefore, I essentially still want Don to come forward with his video to Sony and to me publicly apologizing and everything, and the same goes to Jeremy. Public video apology, and both of y’all have to leave the internet for good, and leave me and my family and friends at peace.

Anyway, going back to, uh, Christopher… by the way, I know you’re in Texas. You’re in Texas, you [[Obesity|fatty fat fat]]! He has been donating to the troll cause and such over at The PLACE! The [[The GAMe PLACe|game and hobby place]] of which we are fully aware of and have grown to love and such, but there is more to THE PLACE, and its three associated stores located only within [[Virginia|Virginia]], and I know from cold hard facts... including facts from a Hook article back in August of [[2002|2002]], that... the four stores, their owner, a one Mr. Robert Lightburn... is... a [[Pedofork|child molester]], and convicted sex offender in Illinois.

And think about this! The place in [[Charlottesville|Charlottesville]] is located right across from a school, and it is owned by a child molester! Parents! Children! Associated families! I don’t think you would want anyone who is a minor, or [[Chris and Reality|even under the age of ten]] to go into such a place that is owned by a child molester, and I am sure that in association, even though he is married, [[Michael Snyder]] has his own child molestation skeleton [[Homos|in his closet]]! He probably even molested his own daughter for all I know! I do not have concrete facts, so therefore that is just theory until I am corrected. But the point is the place is owned by a child molester, and nobody should ever, ever go into that place again… and it should be closed down for good! And that’s all I have for this video right now. Stay tuned for another [[slow-in-the-minds|Trroll ess-especial twirl esspose]].

== Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy ==
In this video, also known as '''101 2466''', Chris accepts [[Surfshack_Tito_(troll)#Tito.27s_official_response_to_Chris|Tito's attempt to meet his demands]], while Thorg appears to have made no such efforts yet. Chris is still awaiting the money he demanded (apparently forgetting that in the last video he admitted that blackmail was a felony), and another part of Jeremy's face and part of another photo Chris has obtained of him are shown to viewers.

This video also shows us that Chris now has two piercings on each ear. It was previously believed he had two on his right ear and only one on his left.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9Nn4u9b_hJk}}
| stardate = 10 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[It's not that cold]]
| next = [[Correction of EX relationship status]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Miss duh dadline.jpg|thumb|but miss the deadline...]]
[[File:CheckYourPriv.jpg|thumb|Y'all best remember to check your privileges, ya hear?]]
Well, it seems I have gotten a well-wise response to my recent videos...from [[Surfshack Tito|master Don]], of which I will now respond to as [[speech impediment|sutss]]. You d-you made a wise descision, Don. I am-as long as I get the money before the end of the month, I will withhold the photographs and the other information. I can promise you that, but miss the deadline... ''[widens his eyes and stares into the camera]'' and you certainly don't have to be my slave for a week. I mean, aside from the [[Niggos|slave laws]] and everything. ''[shakes head and sighs]''

Anyway, apparently I have learned from my esteemed colleague that Thorg, master Jeremy, is still not convinced I mean businesss. Well, just to show you, Jeremy, that I mean businesss, I'm going to reveal a little bit more about you.

Here is a closeup--another closeup of that pho-to-graph zoomed in on your pizza face! ''[looks off-camera at the picture and zooms in on a different part]'' Excuse me a moment. ''[whispers]'' alright, ''[mumbles, as air conditioner gets louder]'' as well as a zoom-in on a possibly more current, or possibly previous pho-to-graph of yourself. Aaand, I'm gonna reveal a couple of random tidbits about you from my notes!

Once again, Jeremy lives in Can-a-da...and he likes the typical geeky things, without being stereotypical, of course, and not offending anyone of the sort, because I am considerably one myself, because I like [[Pokemon|Pokemon]], [[Yu-Gi-Oh|Yu-Gi-Oh!]], and all- and [[My Little Pony|that sort]]. Apparently, uh, he is a LARPer. Live action role playing! As it was portrayed in that episode of [[Wikipedia:The Tester|The Tester]]!

''[begins to speak in a high-pitched, singsongy voice]''

"Oh, look at me, I'm [[Chris and English|trollicking]] about! We are going to be warriors and whatnot! Yay, we won the things! [[Chris and Reality|And then we're future cops, sent being- mall-for future mall cops]]! Mall cops of the future! La, la la, la la, la la! We're LARPing about! LARP LARP LARP LARP! LARP. LAAAARP. LARP! Lorp."

And we know that the atheist does not like [[Chris and Hypocrisy#"I'll pray for you to open your mind" — Tolerance|having his mind changed]] about [[GodJesus|God]]. I mean, I gotta tell you, man, God is all-powerful. How do you think the [[speech impediment|Earss]] was created aside from the big bang? Who had to put the big bang together? God! And I know from my bible ''[shows bible]'', my hand on it, that between him and [[GodJesus|Jesus]], they're pretty powerful! They're pretty powerful individuals... and I believe in them. They have- I mean, Jesus has done a lot with his miracles before he had to [[Obesity|weigh]] the cross, which I just [[Chris and his Ego|empathize]] with him on that,i mean.

''[closes eyes and inhales through teeth]'' it's like I can feel the thorns that were drug-that were drudge, plowed through his hands and his feet! [[Fail|Thorn of crowns]]. Mm. Empathy is a powerful thing.

But...I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have God or Jesus at my-by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists...are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer...I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork, following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!

You have until August 31st to reply and follow my demands of admitting...your wrongdoings, and making the public apologies via [[YouTube|YouTube]] video, as I am a-well aware, as I have made note, but apparently the billboard is no longer an option. Anyway, between the YouTube public apology, and leaving the internet alone, AND leaving me, my [[Chandler Family Tree|family]], my friends at peace, that is what I demand of you, master Jeremy. ''[air conditioner gets louder]''

Your move. 'Cause if you're not, fulfill- if you don't don't respond by the 31st, [''[[death threats|snaps fingers and widens his eyes]]''] I mean business. Check your privileges!

== Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya ==

Chris, [[Homo|lipstick and all]], threatens [[Jack Thaddeus]]. Unlike his reveal on [[Thorg]], Chris becomes two-faced as he accepts Jack's desire to be a transvestite and seek gender reassignment surgery, yet he attacks Jack because he chases after guys. Like the reveal on Thorg, Chris wants to see him trolled not so much out of a tit-for-tat desire for revenge, but rather because Chris found out he was [[homos]]exual. Interestingly, Chris gives Jack ten extra days to come up with his apology video and to leave the Internet.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w1SN9Jl-DTk}}
| stardate = 16 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Blue tomgirl|text}}, {{Redbra|text}}
| previous = [[Kaka Makeup Basics]]
| next = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
}}
{{quote|Blackmailing me to hump your Playstation 3 causing great embarassment, to sing "It's okay to be gay", and he Posted disgusting advertisements on the [[CWCipedia]]}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:BI.jpg|thumb|The one time you wish he was wearing DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.]]
[''Chris sits down and sighs.''] Good day. I felt that it's appropriate to dress in my feminine attire as I- as you can see fits. [''He stretches out one leg, trying to show off his ass.''] Because I am definite calling out one Jack Thaddeusss, and we happen to share ''[He lifts his leg and rests it on his knee, giving the camera a buffalo shot.]'' some similar common interests, a few of which. Like, uh, yes, we can- we- we do accept the adj- we both accept the adjective of being called trannies, esscept for him, he's, uhh, he's just went through a whole-- the whole gender-changing operation. Yep. Lopping off his [[Pickle|dick]] and puttin' on the ol'... an' gettin' it tucked in. I am not- I would never chop- I would never do that to- [[Homos#Fear of becoming a homo|I would never do that.]] Go and have a sex change operation. I'm proud to be a male, and I'm even more proud to be a [[tomgirl]].
[[File:Spanking2.jpg|thumb|"I like to get smacked by my woman."]]
And we both like to cross-dress, yes. And we both are into [[April 16 Fetish Vids|femdom]], which is a female domination. Oh, yeah. ''[creepy chuckle]'' I like to get smacked by [[Ivy|my woman]]. Mmm... yes.

Except for, uh, I would definitely s- put against, uh, Misher Jack, or, as is real name is said in de title of this video, which I will say in a moment. Uhh, in the pro- in the- in his- in his case of him, uh, having his operation and going through it, I feel that he would defi'itely '''not''' be considered any at all a woman- a woman whatsoever. He just only fashionably ''[raises his hands]'' looks like a woman, with the parts and whatnot, except he does not have- essept he would not have a uterus, and he would have no repoductive[sic] organs. I mean, I want to have [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|children]] someday. Obviously, he don't. ''[Gives a disgusted look.]''

And, uh, also my associate dat gave me the information on him, he- pretty much, uh, he pretty much is plain out callin' him a tomgirl, but you know what? He's not a tomgirl at all. He's just a full-blown [[Homos|gay]]. ''[Stares into space, then looks down at his clipboard.]''

Anyway, gettin' back on topic, uh, his name is, uh, Ahu-viya, which, uh, it is spelled at the title of this video. Hmm, he is in Pennsylvania, and, uh, I have pretty much just gave a few descriptions of him, uh, yeah. He definitely appreciates his... [[homos]]eshual culture as it is. I mean, yeah. Everybody- everybody who hates- everybody who is a ho- who is a homophobe, ''[drops his leg down and sits upright]'' go ahead and call him on it. Call Ahuviya a God-dang homo.

[''moans with a derp voice, imitating Ahuviya''] Homo! I like to be a homo! [[Slow in the minds|He-he durr-hurr bluh bleh bleh!]] Eeeeoooouh! [''shakes his head with his tongue sticking out, then blows a raspberry'']

Yeah. But, of course, the, uh- my demands are simple, as they ha' been recently. I want Mr Ha- Ahuviya to make the public apologies for all the things he have done a- he has done against me. ''[Quieter voice.]'' Shoot, I forgot to write 'em down. But he knows what he did! Among which, uh, he has, uh, pestured me, and, uh, [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|on]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2|the]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|phone]], and uh, [[Chris humps his PS3|blackmailed me into]] [[It's UGH!|doin' a few things]]. Yeah, I'll in from th- get those stats in and, uh, if he doesn't, uh, I might add them to the description of this video, after I wri- after I write 'em down.

Hmph. Anyway, 25-year-old Ahuviya, homooooo! Pretty much it. ''[Swings his leg back up to rest on his knee.]'' We do agree on being cross-dressersss. Although, I must also admit, um, ''[to himself]''I should have access to that actually, uh, yeah. [''Grabs his [[PS3]] controller''] Just give me oooone moment. [''Boots up his PS3''] Yeah, I think this is it. Whoops. [''puts controller in both hands''] I think actually did... save it on here... Huhhh, zoom in, I only want a but of a free sample.

[''Grabs his camera shakily.''] For thisss, as usuaw... hmm, I gotta get a little clossse here, because I don't have zoom-in functions on the Cross-Video bar Photo Viewer...

[''Cue a bright yellow light''] Closer the picture. [''Shows a close-up of a man's chin.''] Yeah. Anyway, he just does a bad- [[Chris and hypocrisy|he just does a terrible job in cross- quote-unquote "cross-dressing," because I mean, look at that stubble on his face!]] [''Smacks his hand on the camera lens.'']

[''Uncovers to show his arm, then the camera pans over his messy room.''] And then look at me all over. I take the time to shave myself. [''Close-up of his bare thigh, then slaps it.''] Smooth. ''[He slaps his ass.]''

[''He jerks up the camera back to his face.''] So yeah. Ahuviya... make your apology video, leave the Internet, leave me and my family and my friends at peace. You have... uhh, lemme see... [''He checks his calender, counting under his breath.]'' ''One, two three...'' Yeah. You have until the tenth of [[September 2011|September of this year]] to upload your video of apology for all the wrongs you have done to me which I list in the description a li'l later. Good day.

== Re-Calling Ahuvia ==

On 23 August 2011, Chris made another video calling out Jack Thaddeus once more. As the time ticks down, Chris reveals more information about him, including the fact that he was a Communist, spewing patriotic crap that would have fit in more with the [[wikipedia:McCarthy Hearings|McCarthy Hearings]] than today. Incidentally, he further proves his ignorance by [[Honor roll|confusing communism and fascism]]. Like his previous Jack Thaddeus/ADF video, it was removed for hate speech.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Re-Calling Ahuvia
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ofdre0Ima1A}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| next = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

{{Transcription}}

== Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David ==
Chris, still high on victory, turns his attention to [[BlueSpike]], believing him to be the cause of the prank phone calls of people shouting out "JULAAAAAAAAAAY!" and calling him [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]. His reasoning for going after BlueSpike also seemed to be more towards his condition of Asperger's and the fact that he has no job, likes big rooms and is a gamer, despite the fact that BlueSpike would be about 15-16 at the time and would be unable to really get a stable job, unlike someone we know who'd be able to get a job but doesn't want to. It too was removed from Youtube shortly after being posted.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uEMFYldLCUM}}
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.5 Shirt
| previous = [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| next = [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Toht.jpg|thumb|Chris looked at the ark.]]

''[Chris puts his hand to his mouth and clears his throat.]'' JUUULAYYYYYY! JUUUULAAYY! IT'S IAN BRANDON ANDERSON! ''[He waves his hands while saying this]'' JUUULLLAY! ''[incomprehensible retarded noises here, up to...]'' Ian Brandon Anderson. JUUUUULLAYYY! *pfffffttt* ''[blows raspberry while flipping the bird]'' And that's who we are calling out next. The, uh, person who posed-pretended to be an adult woman but yet was a little, uh, little brat. Al...-he was also known as his alias Max, and Bluespike, but his real name is... ''[hits pad of paper offscreen]'' David!

And he lives in... ''[hits pad again]'' California! Don't know that much about his age, but he's at least thirteen years old. And guess what... he is confirmed to have... ''[dramatic lean forward]'' [[Aspergers_syndrome|assburgers]]! And I don't care much for aspergians, and I do not care to be associated with, erm, an... and I do not accept the ''[makes quote-marks hand gesture]'' scientific fact that [[Autism|autism]] is linked to assburgers at any time. I would quote myself as to what I said in the esstra part of [[Autism Tutorial Extra|my Little Big Planet 2 animation]], but I don't remember the words at this point.

''[picks up camera and turns around, with it facing the back of the room]''

Except that it definitely sounds like a bad cut of cow meat. And of course he was responsible for dat Julie fiasco and making me drive all the way to Cleveland, Ohioooo! And cutting up, one of the, cutting up the second medal, and ''[sounding like Popeye?] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Shoving it up my ass.]]'' And... he likes ''[dramatic gesture]'' big rooms! [[Chris and hypocrisy|And he has no job]]! And he is also a [[PS3|gamer]]. Here is a close up, featured from his photograph!

''[Chris turns the camera around to face the TV]''

''[high pitched]'' Look at his buck [[Fangs|teeth]]! ''[normal again]'' Or at least the gap between his teeth. That's a biiiig gap! Look at how big that gap is! Huh? Gap! Teeth! Buck teeth? Perhaps. But definitely a gap.

''[Chris turns the camera back towards himself while spinning around]''

And, Mr. David, you have until September 15th to come up with the apology video, and leave me and my family and my friends at peace, oh, and also in your apology video tell everyone to stop making phonecalls to me that say ''[retarded hand waving again]'' JUUULLAAAAY! JUUULLLAAAYYY! And get rid... make sure that no-one ever calls me Ian Brandon Anderson ever again, because, ''[fast]'' thatisnotmyname! ''[long pause]'' You have until September 15th. JUUUULLLLAAAY- ''[cuts out]''

{{Troll Videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2357.MOV]]|nextlink=[[It's not that cold]] / [[Correction of EX relationship status]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-06]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-09]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011|2011-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

An Inspired Poem for Jackie

2011-05-27T03:55:37Z

Travis Cwckle: /* The poem */

{{Quote|You keep that to yourself; print this message so you can read it every day to lift you up as much as you have lifted me. :)|Chris's words to Jackie}}

On 1 [[October 2010]], Chris made a surprise return to his [[Chris and writing|poetic]] career, composing an ode to his then-[[sweetheart]] [[Jackie]].<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 16]]</ref>

==The poem==
<poem>[[Jacklyn]], your smile is a ray of sunshine to me.
Seeing your beautiful and radiant face,
I can't help but want to kiss it and your sweet lips.
Your wavy hair drives me wild;
I want to run my fingers through it gently
and feel the energy that burns wildly and sweetly.
Your wit and smarts guide me great,
helping me sort out better the dilemmas I've been pondering.
The distance between us is hard to bear.
I throw away the sudoku puzzle of the newspaper
I was working on when I thought up this poem,
so I would [[Sonichu's Edge|rush fastest]] to you.
Sweetest Jacklyn, you are the missing piece
I've been longing for to complete me.
While I am capable of being independent,
I just feel soo much better with you by my side.
Sweetest Jacklyn Romy, I Love You Soo Much.
Let us rid each other of the distance that
keeps us apart, so we can be together forever.
</poem>

==References==
<references />

==See also:==
*[[Love Quest]]

{{Writings}}
[[Category:Poetry]]

Megagi La Skunk

2011-03-14T06:09:42Z

Travis Cwckle:

{{quote|Megagi is one of four protectors of Parodyse Island, where unique [[Wikipedia:Chao (Sonic)|Chao]] of different breeds reside. Megagi can get tough when her island is invaded by those she isn't familar with. Her physical strength surpasses her [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|special scent attack]], but it still can make her opponents tear up|[[:Image:315-ACMegagiBck.jpg|Megagi ''Animal Crossing'' card]]}}

[[Image:MegagiDecay.jpg|thumb|left|An example of Megagi's change in personality.]]
[[Image:Megagi.jpg|thumb|Megagi's reaction to being included in Christian's shitty comic.]]

'''Megagi La Skunk''' is one of [[Megan Schroeder]]'s furry-inspired characters who dates [[Bionic the Hedgehog]]. She has outlived her creator's presence in the comic, similar to [[Jiggliami]], except Megan was (probably) not a [[troll]]. Megagi does not have breasts.

{{quote|SHE DOES HAVE BREASTS. Megan Schroeder DREW THAT WAY.|Chris on Megagi, [[IRC (20 January 2009)]]}}

Megagi was originally called '''Spunky Skunk''', which Chris obviously didn't like because it might have reminded him of a rather [[Semen|nasty habit]].

Given her name and color scheme, she likely constitutes a plagiarism of ''[[Wikipedia:Tiny Toon Adventures|Tiny Toon Adventures]]'' character [[Wikipedia:Fifi La Fume|Fifi La Fume]].

Worth noting is that Megagi was originally from [[Parody]] Island, where she probably lives with Megan's other traced [[Sonic]]/[[Pokémon]] hybrids, but the name was changed to [[Chris and religion|Parodyse]] Island in the comic.

Megagi used to have somewhat of a different personality from the other female characters at first; she seemed to be the [[Silvana|tomboyish]] type, and Chris described her as being like an "Army Soldier". In [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]], she calls Chris out on his shit.<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/images/0/03/SchuComic6P21.jpg]</ref> Although her concept is still not so original, it was different from the typical [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]] who just liked shopping. However, in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], she gets watered down just like the rest of them - [[Women's Rights|girly and no personality]] - and later on in the comic she is further reduced to being [[Bionic]]'s personal cheerleader.
{{clear}}

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:085-ChrisChanWMegagi.jpg|Chris-Chan and Megagi touch their balls.
Image:128-CChanMegagi.jpg
Image:316-MegagiOriginal.jpg|Two of these things...
Image:317-Megagi.jpg|...are not like the others
</gallery></center>

==Sauces==
<references />

==See also:==
{{Fan art|chris=Megagi}}
*[[Megan Schroeder]]
*[[Sailor Megtune]]
*[[Bionic the Hedgehog]]

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Homos]]
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]

Kacey Call 6

2011-03-06T07:44:14Z

Travis Cwckle:

31 [[August 2009]]

*[[Chris]] got some calls from a [[troll]] pretending to be from [[GameFAQs|gamefaqs.com]] (Chris pronounces "GameFAQs" as if "faqs" is a word).
*Chris thinks he defeated a troll by calling him back and telling him to shut the fuck up.
*Chris's parents drop him off at the [[mall]] so he can draw [[comics]] while they go use their senior discount at Ihop.
*If Chris went to Ihop with his parents it would "mess things up" because they're using their senior discount to buy Chris sandwiches.
*Chris wrote a list of nice discussion topics because he doesn't want [[Kacey]] to yell at him again.
*First topic: ''Hannah Montanna''. Kacey says it's for 12 year old girls, Chris thinks it's pretty good and wants to buy it on Blu-Ray.
*Second topic: Chris's [[college]] days. His first good memory is the time a hypnotist came and included Chris in his act.
*First the hypnotist wanted Chris to insult him, so Chris called him [[Random-access humor|"Uncle Screwy Louie"]]. He still thinks it's funny.
*Then the hypnotist said "when you open your eyes you'll see everyone naked". Chris didn't really see anyone naked, but he played along as smiled at the ladies.
*Another good college memory is when he was included in a quiz show game. Chris didn't make it very far, but at least he tried.
*Chris was in touch with his "girl crush" [[Kellie Andes]] for a while after graduation; recently he found out she's married with two children.
*Chris could tell by looking a prom picture of her that she was already taken by [[JERK|some guy]], when he saw that it put him into [[Stress|shock]] for a while.
*Chris made a few friends and acquaintances at [[PVCC]], "but they kinda came and gone", especially after he got kicked out of English class. He "became shy" after that.
*Chris talks about a teacher, or as Chris calls him "[[CADD Chef|this one black guy]]" at PVCC, and how upon first being there he "had bad vibes about him". He picked almost as many arguments as his father! Chris says the teacher would constantly [[Kick the Autistic|put him down and what-not]], with mean insults like "That's not right, do it over bla bla bla"... Kacey points out that's not putting him down, that's teaching. Chris did not like his tone of voice. "The way he carried on and such. He talked more calmly to the other students, I actually observed."
*Chris was happy to graduate from PVCC, because "It felt more like a Hellhole than Heaven". Chris was sad to graduate from [[High School]], because he didn't receive any awards.
*He's still whining about not getting any awards; he got a star pin but "that's SMALL in comparison to other awards". Kacey tells him to stop being childish and grow the fuck up; Chris ignores her and whines more.
*Chris watched ''Labyrinth'' because it's Kacey's favorite movie. Kacey talks about David Bowie's [[Pickle|"bulge"]]; Chris gets uncomfortable and tries to change the subject because he is STRAIGHT.
*Chris "tried reading" ''[[Harry Potter]]'' but couldn't get into it. Also competition with [[Pokemon]] or whatever.
*Chris suddenly tard rages because a troll keeps calling him. He doesn't understand why he keeps calling after Chris told him to stop.
*Kacey asks what books Chris has read recently. He of course says Pamela Anderson's ''Star'', then admits he hasn't read anything else. Kacey tells him he should read ''Catch 22''. Chris thinks a "Catch 22" is a kind of "sexual touch".
*The only books Chris owns are [[R.L. Stine|''Goosebumps'' and ''Fear Street'']].
*He also read ''The Giver'', so he spends like five minutes recounting what happens in that book.
*Chris tries claiming that he has multiple personalities, Kacey tells him he's full of shit.
*'''Chris says he JUST NOW changed over to his other personality, so now he's [[Christopher]] instead of Christian. He is serious.'''
*"Christopher" says he only caught some of the conversation and doesn't know what's going on.
*Kacey tells him he might have a brain tumor.
*Christopher gives up and says he just switched back to Christian.
*Christian says "Christopher" came out recently while he was playing ''[[Guitar Hero]]''. He thinks there is a difference between his two personalities' voices.
*Chris says he'll talk to his doctor about this serious problem.
*Kacey isn't taking his stupidity seriously, so Chris suddenly backtracks and says he just made up this multiple personality shit to mess with the trolls.
*Chris stopped taking some of his meds and now he feels more confident.
*Chris has been taking Lipitor for the last 2 years to keep his cholesterol down. He's like "It was optional, but I thought it was a good idea".
*Chris says he mostly eats grilled chicken sandwiches from [[McDonald's]]. He thinks this is healthy. He also only eats Hungry Man dinners "once or twice" a month, mostly he eats Healthy Choice frozen dinners.
*Chris says he walks about an hour a day around the neighborhood, and thinks this is "strenuous".
*Kacey thinks Chris is going to die.

==Transcript==
{{transcription}}

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?mw15mcm0dx9empx mp3 of phonecall]

{{succession|label=Kacey Phone Calls|prevlink=[[Kacey Call 5]]|nextlink=[[Kacey Call 7]]}}

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

Autism Tutorial Part 5

2011-02-16T14:55:20Z

Travis Cwckle:

In '''Autism Tutorial Part 5''', [[Chris]] uses ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' to demonstrate how to "properly" introduce an [[autistic]] person to a new friend, but all it really does is ascertain that his only motivation for socializing with other people, is that doing so theoretically heightens his chances of getting that [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up]] his [[duck]] so desperately hungers for. He then reenacts, yet again, an assault of [[Clyde Cash]].

Chris also fails to see the hypocrisy of demanding people treat him nicely because he's retarded, then telling people who are deformed or mentally challenged that he's frightened of them and wants them to stay away form him.
==Video==

<Center>{{#ev:youtube|uvPZbDwYGjE}}</Center>

===Transcript===

''(Rather than a voice-over, the first segment of the video is a text-only conversation between sack-Chris and several sack-imaginary girls.)''

Mic: Nonette, this is [[Christian Chandler]], but you may call him Chris. Chris, this here is Nonette Sehen.

Sack-Chris: Hey Nonette, you are a pretty woman, and I am happy to meet you.

''(The two Sack-people touch eachother, presumably symbolizing a handshake)''

Nonette: ''(clearly needs glasses)'' Well, I think you have a very good face, and I am delighted to meet you too.

''(Chris's melodic voice takes over narration for the remainder of the video)''

Now understand, ''this'' is what I'm talking about for us autistic people. We are too shy by default! But on earning our trust, or if we feel comfortable or like the other person on our indid-ividual instincts, we will open up. And to start us right, we need either: A) The other person to approach and talk to us, upon their own will, or B) have our own trusted friend or family introduce us to other people of our respective ages.

In this scenario, it was a great match for me, for A) she is a [[Boyfriend-free girl|single woman, without a boyfriend]]: B) she is pretty, and easy on my eyes. And C) this woman I could feel comfortable with, and feel a good and honest aura from her. From this a good friendship, and hopefully a [[sex|f-]] a long relationship will stay between us for the long time. (Voice deepens with hatred) Do not bring me down here, naysayers and [[Trolls|haters]].

Lets look at a few other scenarios of similar to opposite results. Obviously, most women: ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' Easy on my eyes, good-humored, sweet, pretty... [[Niggo|black]], white, [[Punchy|Asian]], Christian, [[Michael Snyder|Jewish]], Buddhism, I have no, c- I have no care about skin color or religion, whatever. I will be kind to all of them, respectful and welcoming them, to have them in my circle of friends. Lesbians, too... Just don't get on my bad side here. ''[Subitle: "To clarify, the 'Don't get on my bad side' part refers to All Women in general'"]''

[[JERKS|Men]], my own... ''kind'', on the other hand, I would feel most hesitant towards. Because I have had fewer male friends in my life, and I have had mostly bad experiences around them. ''Plus'', and this is very important, in my autism test it was found that I get along better with women, well over ''men''. ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' And considering my life experiences and my own opinion, I totally agree with that. If the, uh, individual, however, offers a, uh, friendly gesture, and does not make me [[Chris and anger|angry]] or make me feel most uncomfortable, or ill at ease, I will be willing to give him a chance and welcome him as a friend, and nothing more. ''[Subtitle: "**PLATONICALLY Friendly**"]''

However, going back to the mean people of the internet... Upon meeting one of them in real life - and I will be able to recognize them sure enough, at least with basic instincts - I will not hold back my endured rage. Just ask this crying [[Clyde]]. ''(A scene of a livid Sack-Chris smacking Sack-Clyde follows before the narration continues.)''

Physically and [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally challenged]] individuals will vary more. Good results upon if they are easy to look at, if they are able to speak clearly, even ''slooowly'', that I can easily understand them. ''[Subtitle: "I mean NO Personal Offense whatsoever to Any Individual Person or Group of People."]'' And now, uh, the other part, the other side, whoa, back off! I'm spooked if you are [[Chris and Fashion#The "Gay Trucker" outfit|ugly]], [[Duck|seriously disfigured]], especially in the face, that you [[Chris and English|mumble more than you speak]], you're [[Speech impediment|hard to understand]] at all. It is nothing personal, and I apologize for anyone who feels at unease after hearing what I just said, but it's just the way I feel. That's all.

{{succession|label=[[Autism Tutorial|Autism Tutorial Videos]]|prevlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 4]]|nextlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 6]]|}}

[[Category:LittleBigPlanet]]

Facebook statuses

2010-11-16T12:56:36Z

Travis Cwckle:

Chris had funny [[Facebook]] statuses when he still had a Facebook.

Heh.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Text
! Time
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is [[Feel So Lonesome|lonesome]] and playin' his [[Video games|videogame]].
| January 10, [[2008]] at 12:37am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome and playin' his videogame.
| January 10, 2008 at 12:39am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome and waitin' at the [[University of Virginia|Alderman Library]]
| January 16, 2008 at 3:00am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome at [[14 Branchland Court|home]].
| January 18, 2008 at 8:45pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome at home and tired of the snow.
| January 22, 2008 at 3:37am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome at home
| January 23, 2008 at 8:17pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at the UVA's Alderman Library Lounge This Afternoon.
| January 23, 2008 at 8:20pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at the UVA's Alderman Library's Lounge This Afternoon.
| January 24, 2008 at 2:23am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| January 24, 2008 at 4:59pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at [[The GAMe PLACe|The Game Place]] this evening for [[Pokémon|Pokemon]] League.
| January 24, 2008 at 11:52pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| January 25, 2008 at 5:36pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be attending the early service at his [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]]
| January 26, 2008 at 10:18pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| January 27, 2008 at 6:01pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at the UVA's Alderman Library's Lounge this Afternoon
| January 28, 2008 at 7:27pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at the UVA's Alderman Library's Lounge this Afternoon, [[Virgin with rage|and I am real lonely.]]
| January 28, 2008 at 9:11pm
|-
| I'm not seeing any NEW posts on my wall, please write something pleasant, some [[Gal-pal|gal]].
| January 29, 2008 at 3:13am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at The Game Place this evening for Pokemon League.
| January 31, 2008 at 10:17pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be attending the early service at his church
| February 2, 2008 at 7:14pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| February 7, 2008 at 9:23am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at The Game Place this evening for Pokemon League.
| February 7, 2008 at 4:56pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| February 12, 2008 at 3:44pm
|}

== Application statuses ==

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Text
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler was reviewing friends' friends for [[Love Quest|dating]], using Spark
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler wants to know if you would [[Hanky-panky|do him]]? Yes? No?
|-
|[[Troll|Someone]] is checking out Christian Weston Chandler on Zoosk.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is in MOOD for a [[Rape|SWEET KISS]] from someone really special Is that YOU?
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler gave a sweet ANONYMOUS kiss to a Secret Someone special Rachel Davis Isnt this exciting?
|-
|Someone rated Christian Weston Chandler on Are YOU Sexy.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has added FunWall.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is being viewed on 'Meet New People'.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler added the iLike application.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler added [[Chris and music|music]] to their profile
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler took the [[Sweetheart|Ideal Mate]] quiz
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler says: I feel Lonely
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is being viewed on MNF
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler just added the [[Cherokian Clan|Heritage]] app.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler , New Stickers are waiting for you!
|-
|Someone Yes'd Christian Weston Chandler on MNF
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has added a new [[Son-Chu|bumper sticker]]
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is checking out Are You Interested?!
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has created a playlist called [[Christian's Favorite Hits!|CWC\'s Jams]].
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler voted for his favorite version of a song
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler listened to the song
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is being flirted with on 'Meet New People'.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is checking out Meet New People!
|-
|Update! Top Friends News from Christian Weston Chandler!
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler found someone interesting on Mesmo [[Chris and television|TV]] Match
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler took a quiz
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler added [[Family Guy|TV favorites]] to their profile using Mesmo TV
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is passing teammates in TV Show Trivia
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler found out which [[For Julie's Eyes Only|sexual position]] is best for him
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is a [[Song for Jackie.MOV|Naughty Genie]] and is granting naughty wishes to friends
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has made a naughty [[China|wish]] to Linda DeLorme. Linda DeLorme must now fulfill it.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler granted a naughty wish back to Linda DeLorme
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler joined the Compare HOTNESS Tournament!
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has just sent a new post.
|-
|Someone flirted with Christian Weston Chandler!
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler found a lucky Facebook [[Homos|Fairy]]!
|-
|Naughty Genie granted Christian Weston Chandler a Wish
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is playing the Sex Appeal game.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler sent Frog playing banjo gift to Jessica Gombert
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler accepted a Smiley from Jessica Gombert.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler sent Rachel Reynolds a Juno Movie Message.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler voted for Melissa Williams for FB Models.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has a Blue heart !
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler accepted a Nosey from Jessica Gombert.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler accepted a Bluey from Jessica Gombert.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler accepted a Spotty from Jessica Gombert.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler gained a Scratch And Win title
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has been loved
|}

Facebook statuses

2010-11-16T12:55:05Z

Travis Cwckle:

Chris had funny [[Facebook]] statuses when he still had a Facebook.

Heh.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Text
! Time
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is [[Feel So Lonesome|lonesome]] and playin' his [[Video games|videogame]].
| January 10, [[2008]] at 12:37am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome and playin' his videogame.
| January 10, 2008 at 12:39am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome and waitin' at the [[University of Virginia|Alderman Library]]
| January 16, 2008 at 3:00am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome at [[14 Branchland Court|home]].
| January 18, 2008 at 8:45pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome at home and tired of the snow.
| January 22, 2008 at 3:37am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is lonesome at home
| January 23, 2008 at 8:17pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at the UVA's Alderman Library Lounge This Afternoon.
| January 23, 2008 at 8:20pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at the UVA's Alderman Library's Lounge This Afternoon.
| January 24, 2008 at 2:23am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| January 24, 2008 at 4:59pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at [[The GAMe PLACe|The Game Place]] this evening for [[Pokémon|Pokemon]] League.
| January 24, 2008 at 11:52pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| January 25, 2008 at 5:36pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be attending the early service at his [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]]
| January 26, 2008 at 10:18pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| January 27, 2008 at 6:01pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at the UVA's Alderman Library's Lounge this Afternoon
| January 28, 2008 at 7:27pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at the UVA's Alderman Library's Lounge this Afternoon, [[Virgin with rage|and I am real lonely.]]
| January 28, 2008 at 9:11pm
|-
| I'm not seeing any NEW posts on my wall, please write something pleasant, some [[Gal-pal|gal]].
| January 29, 2008 at 3:13am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at The Game Place this evening for Pokemon League.
| January 31, 2008 at 10:17pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be attending the early service at his church
| February 2, 2008 at 7:14pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| February 7, 2008 at 9:23am
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler will be at The Game Place this evening for Pokemon League.
| February 7, 2008 at 4:56pm
|-
| Christian Weston Chandler is at home
| February 12, 2008 at 3:44pm
|}

== Application statuses ==

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Text
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler was reviewing friends' friends for [[Love Quest|dating]], using Spark
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler wants to know if you would [[Hanky-panky|do him]]? Yes? No?
|-
|[[Troll|Someone]] is checking out Christian Weston Chandler on Zoosk.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is in MOOD for a [[Rape|SWEET KISS]] from someone really special Is that YOU?
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler gave a sweet ANONYMOUS kiss to a Secret Someone special Rachel Davis Isnt this exciting?
|-
|Someone rated Christian Weston Chandler on Are YOU Sexy.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has added FunWall.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is being viewed on 'Meet New People'.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler added the iLike application.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler added [[Chris and music|music]] to their profile
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler took the [[Sweetheart|Ideal Mate]] quiz
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler says: I feel Lonely
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is being viewed on MNF
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler just added the [[Cherokian clan|Heritage]] app.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler , New Stickers are waiting for you!
|-
|Someone Yes'd Christian Weston Chandler on MNF
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has added a new [[Son-Chu|bumper sticker]]
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is checking out Are You Interested?!
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has created a playlist called [[Christian's Favorite Hits!|CWC\'s Jams]].
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler voted for his favorite version of a song
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler listened to the song
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is being flirted with on 'Meet New People'.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is checking out Meet New People!
|-
|Update! Top Friends News from Christian Weston Chandler!
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler found someone interesting on Mesmo [[Chris and television|TV]] Match
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler took a quiz
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler added [[Family Guy|TV favorites]] to their profile using Mesmo TV
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is passing teammates in TV Show Trivia
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler found out which [[For Julie's Eyes Only|sexual position]] is best for him
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is a [[Song for Jackie.MOV|Naughty Genie]] and is granting naughty wishes to friends
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has made a naughty [[China|wish]] to Linda DeLorme. Linda DeLorme must now fulfill it.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler granted a naughty wish back to Linda DeLorme
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler joined the Compare HOTNESS Tournament!
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has just sent a new post.
|-
|Someone flirted with Christian Weston Chandler!
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler found a lucky Facebook [[Homos|Fairy]]!
|-
|Naughty Genie granted Christian Weston Chandler a Wish
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler is playing the Sex Appeal game.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler sent Frog playing banjo gift to Jessica Gombert
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler accepted a Smiley from Jessica Gombert.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler sent Rachel Reynolds a Juno Movie Message.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler voted for Melissa Williams for FB Models.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has a Blue heart !
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler accepted a Nosey from Jessica Gombert.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler accepted a Bluey from Jessica Gombert.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler accepted a Spotty from Jessica Gombert.
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler gained a Scratch And Win title
|-
|Christian Weston Chandler has been loved
|}

Carlos Chantor

2010-11-07T12:20:08Z

Travis Cwckle: /* About Me */

[[File:Chantor.jpg|thumb|right|250px|"Experienced for Her Pleasure."]]
{{quote|Before you contacted me again to renew our relationship, I was aiming towards selling myself out as a Male Escort to earn money. I tried applying with C-Ville's "Naughty & Nice" Escort Service; they did not take me. And I printed and discreetly passed out cards, along with posting an ad on escorts.com, under the new alias of '''"Carlos Chantor"''''(DO NOT Tell anyone else of my new alias).|Chris, [[Jackie E-mails 6]].}}
'''Carlos Chantor''' was Chris's alias during his short career as a male escort.

Chris came up with the alias after his first break up with his sweetheart [[Jackie]]. He tried joining with [[Charlottesville]]'s "Naughty and Nice" escort services, but after being told that there was no market for [[duck|bent]], [[autism|autistic]] [[virgin with rage|virgins with rage]], he made a profile at '''Escorts.com'''.

Shockingly, no one called Chris up.

== Escorts.com profile ==

=== About Me ===

Experienced for Her Pleasure.

Hey, Ladies. I am a cool dude to hang with, and I can make you feel good emotionally and [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|show you a fun time]]. I enjoy a lot of things; I'll let you know when it's going too far. Give me a call to hook up (434 area code only).

=== My Details ===

*'''Sex''': Male
*'''Date of Birth''': 2/24/[[1982]] (age 28)
*'''Orientation''': [[Homos|Straight]] Male
*'''Ethnicity''': [[Chris and race|Caucasian]]
*'''Body Type:''' [[Obesity|Average (height/weight proportional)]]
*'''Height''': 5 feet 10 inches (178 cm)
*'''Hair Color''': Brown
*'''Eye Color''': [[Heterochromia|Blue]]
*'''[[Tobacky|Smoking]]''': Do Not Smoke
*'''Drinking''': [[Alcohol|Occasionally]]
*'''Drug Use''': Never use them
*'''Language Spoken''': [[Chris and English|English]]
*'''Secondary Language''': [[Spanish]]

{{stub}}

Jackie

2010-10-31T15:36:28Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Profile */

{{quote|And you will be safe, as long as I [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|do not talk]] about you at all online|[[Jackie e-mails|Every good show needs some foreshadowing]]}}

[[Image:JackSweetheart.jpg|thumb|Jackie IRL, note the shirt and bracelet]]
[[Image:ModNation Sweetheart.jpg|thumb|"[[Sweetheart]]" in ''[[ModNation Racers]]'', note the shirt and bracelet]]

'''Jacklyn "Jackie" Romley''' is a woman whom [[Chris]] met on [[The Hook Cafe]]. Not much is known about Jackie other than what's present in a set of emails and a video uploaded by Chris.

==Jackie's Hook Cafe Profile (Username Luv2Jax)==

===Sexy sweetie looking for love===

I'm a little shy about this, but here goes... I'm looking for a guy between about 26-30 (I like my guys a little older, just call me [[Bob Chandler|old fashioned]] I guess) who is tall, has an [[Chris and health|athletic build, straight teeth, and a good smile.]] I don't really care what you do so long as you're [[monthly tugboat|Chandlerdriven]]; I care more about a [[Chris and fashion|nice sense of style]] and [[Fridays After Five|outgoing personality]]. I want [[Virgin with rage|someone who doesn't need to be with someone but wants to because he knows how amazing it can be!]]

Things I like to do, let's see... I love to go biking, it'd be nice if you did too. I love to play golf as well. I like to go out afer work, [[McDonalds|go to dinner]], [[SpaghettiRoutine|cook dinner]] together (I LOVE to cook), spend the weekend [[Chris and rape|at my family's cabin]], travel, road trip and have [[Hanky-Panky|sex]]. Lots and lots of sex. (not gonna [[List of Chris's lies|lie]]!) Probably during some of the activities I just listed... I want that chemistry that is so strong, just a kiss can lead to wanting to have sex right then and there...
I suppose you want to know a little about me, hm?

I'm 5'3", slender, I don't [[Tobacky|smoke]] (HATE it) but I [[Chris's Big Night Out|drink]] once in a while. I graduated college last year and I work as an [[Chris and English|editor]] for a magazine. I love every day. [[Sonichu's Edge|I run in road races]]. [[Chris and money|Oh, and I shop]]. [[Rosechu|I shop a LOT.]] :) Most importantly, I want that [[Autism|special]] someone I can share my life with and start a family with.

[[Chris and his ego|If you're reading this and you feel like it describes you, I hope you'll email me back!]]

===Characteristics===
Gender: '''Woman''' 
Current Status: '''Single''' 
Looking for: '''Friends, Casual Dating, Long-term Relationship''' 
Body Type: '''Slender, Petite, Curvy''' 
Eyes: '''Hazel''' 
Height: '''5' 03"''' 
Hair Type: '''Red''' 
Age: '''22''' 
Seeks: [[Duck|'''Man for Dating, Man for Friendship''']]

===Profile===
Education: '''College graduate''' 
Ethnicity: '''Caucasian''' 
Religion: '''Unitarian''' 
Political Leanings: '''Independent, Kinky''' 
Neighborhood: '''Charlottesville''' 
City: '''Charlottesville''' 
Occupation: '''Magazine Editor''' 
Have Children: '''No''' 
Want Children: '''[[Crystal Weston Chandler|Yes]]'''

===Habits===
Smoking: '''[[Tobacky|Never]]''' 
Drinking: '''[[Alcohol|Sometimes]]''' 
Drugs: '''Not interested'''

===Personality===
I get around town via: '''[[Son-Chu|Car]], Bycicle, Walk''' 
My dietary preferences are: '''[[Nudes|No red meat]]''' 
I spend my free time: '''Reading, Sex, Creating, Working out, [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|Watching movies]], Shopping, Biking, Frisbee Golf''' 
Funniest Thing: '''[[Random Access Humor|A monkey on roller skates]]'''

===Deeper===
'''If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, wo'd be coming?'''
Wilt Chamberlain, [[Anne Boleyn|Queen Elizabeth I]], [[Mailbag_1#Chris_the_inventor|Leonardo Da Vinci]] and Liberace.

'''What's under your bed?''' My old [[PSP|Playstation]]... it's my guilty pleasure!

'''Two books that everybody should read are''' [[Father_Call#Literature_and_health|Of Mice and Men]] and the Great Gatsby.

===Fill It===
I'm an open-minded person, but '''[[Chris and race|big]][[Homos|ot]][[Women's rights|ry]]''' is a deal-breaker.

Design your ideal mate: the brain of a '''[[art|Andy Warhol]]''' and the body of a '''[[Power|Brad Pitt]]'''

People say '''my smile is my best feature'''.

The first section I turn to in the Hook is '''... ask me...'''

The quickest way to my heart is '''[[McDonald's|good cooking]]''' The quickest way to my [[Hanky-panky|bed]] is '''[[51 50|strong, muscly arms]]'''' And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked '''basted'''

The last concert I attented was '''[[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|Crash Test Dummies]]'''

My favorite cartoon as a kid was '''[[Digimon]]'''

'''Dogwood''' is my favorite local festival.

I wouldn't sell '''my body''' for a billion dollars.

'''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Christina Ricci]]''' is the celebrity I've been told I resemble.

'''[[China|P.F. Changs]]''' is my favorite restaurant.

===In and Out===
The Corner or '''[[CWCville Shopping Center|Downtown Mall]]'''

'''Blockbuster''' or Sneak Reviews

'''[[Matthew Noble call|Best Buy]]''' or Sidetracks

'''Wireless''' or Landline

'''Aristocrat''' or Grey Goose

[[100 2269|Beatles]] or '''Stones'''

CD or '''MP3'''

'''Carmike''' or Vinegar Hill

Dogs or '''[[Cats]]'''

'''Summer''' or Winter

[[Niggos|Black]] or '''[[Dirty Crapped Briefs|Brown]]'''

'''[[Long Island Iced Tea|Bars]]''' or [[14 Branchland Court|Stay Home]]

Kroger or '''Whole Food'''

'''PC''' or Mac

'''Wheel of Fortune''' or Grey's Anatomy

Steak or '''[[Pickles|Salad]]'''

Steak or '''Sushi'''

'''Cavaliers''' or [[Cherokian Clan|Redskins]]

'''Casket''' or Cremation

Fax or '''[[Email]]'''

Dyed or '''Natural'''

'''Pumps''' or Flats

'''Beach''' or Mountains

SUV or '''Sedan'''

==First contact==

{{main|Jackie Emails}}

Jackie corresponded with Chris in a series of emails spanning from 5-21 [[April 2010]]. The exchange culminated in a rather disturbing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|video]] outlining Chris's knowledge of cunnilingus in lurid detail.

==A new dawn?==
In early [[September 2010]] his [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|E-Mail exchange with Clyde and Tito]] suggests the possibility of a new sweetheart, but Chris refuses to reveal her name. Furthermore, he uploaded a ''[[ModNation]]'' character generically named 'Sweetheart', which was discussed to be another [[Chloe]] or [[Wallflower]].

On 13 September 2010 Chris uploaded a [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|video]] officially proclaiming his love to Jackie. Three days later, he produced a [[Song for Jackie.MOV|video]] capitalizing on Jackie's love for Canadian band, Crash Test Dummies, while ''[[Chris and race|in blackface]]''. Chris then spent [[October 2010|October]] [[Chris and cosplaying|cosplaying]] as various characters from [[100 2265|The Hamburglar]] to his own [[ECV 00002|Chris-chan]] [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Sonichu]]. It appears that Jackie is fast on her way to becoming the new [[Ivy]].

==Lars==
Lars is Jackie's ex-[[Jerk|boyfriend]], whom Jackie left over his [[PS3#PlayStation Network|ridiculous obsession]] with [[ModNation Racers|model boats]]. Beginning in late [[September 2010]], Chris developed an [[autism|intense fixation]] on Lars and released a number of videos mocking and attacking his erstwhile rival.

Chris's [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|first video addressing Lars]] appeared on 25 September, in which Chris proves who is the bigger and stronger man by smashing a model boat made of [[Lego]]. A [[New Address|second video]] appeared two days later, where Chris gloats over how Lars has lost Jackie, explains how he will fulfill her every desire, and warns Lars not to mess with her — or [[Death threats|Chris will intervene]]. Three days after that, he continued to mock Lars's interest in boats and set to [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4|babbling about tape dispensers]]. (An [[Lars_Is_Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|extended version]] of this third video appeared on 2 October.)

Subsequent videos in the first two weeks of October addressed other subjects, but Chris returned his attention to Lars in a [[100 2281|fourth video]] released in the wee hours of 15 October. There, a drunk Chris sported a [[Wikipedia:Do-rag|do-rag]] and accused Lars of spreading the old rumor that he's a [[homo]].

==Oops, He Did it Again?==
{{quote|We'll be very happy together. I know it. I will make you happy as much as possible. And when you're feeling down, I'll make you feel better. I love you.|Chris, [[Stare|giving the Creepy Stare]] to his beloved.}}
On 30 [[October 2010]], an [[alcohol|inebriated]]-looking Chris posted a [[ToJackie|video]] in which he pleads Jackie to stay with him.

{{Sweethearts}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]

Jackie

2010-10-31T15:35:46Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Sexy sweetie looking for love */

{{quote|And you will be safe, as long as I [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|do not talk]] about you at all online|[[Jackie e-mails|Every good show needs some foreshadowing]]}}

[[Image:JackSweetheart.jpg|thumb|Jackie IRL, note the shirt and bracelet]]
[[Image:ModNation Sweetheart.jpg|thumb|"[[Sweetheart]]" in ''[[ModNation Racers]]'', note the shirt and bracelet]]

'''Jacklyn "Jackie" Romley''' is a woman whom [[Chris]] met on [[The Hook Cafe]]. Not much is known about Jackie other than what's present in a set of emails and a video uploaded by Chris.

==Jackie's Hook Cafe Profile (Username Luv2Jax)==

===Sexy sweetie looking for love===

I'm a little shy about this, but here goes... I'm looking for a guy between about 26-30 (I like my guys a little older, just call me [[Bob Chandler|old fashioned]] I guess) who is tall, has an [[Chris and health|athletic build, straight teeth, and a good smile.]] I don't really care what you do so long as you're [[monthly tugboat|Chandlerdriven]]; I care more about a [[Chris and fashion|nice sense of style]] and [[Fridays After Five|outgoing personality]]. I want [[Virgin with rage|someone who doesn't need to be with someone but wants to because he knows how amazing it can be!]]

Things I like to do, let's see... I love to go biking, it'd be nice if you did too. I love to play golf as well. I like to go out afer work, [[McDonalds|go to dinner]], [[SpaghettiRoutine|cook dinner]] together (I LOVE to cook), spend the weekend [[Chris and rape|at my family's cabin]], travel, road trip and have [[Hanky-Panky|sex]]. Lots and lots of sex. (not gonna [[List of Chris's lies|lie]]!) Probably during some of the activities I just listed... I want that chemistry that is so strong, just a kiss can lead to wanting to have sex right then and there...
I suppose you want to know a little about me, hm?

I'm 5'3", slender, I don't [[Tobacky|smoke]] (HATE it) but I [[Chris's Big Night Out|drink]] once in a while. I graduated college last year and I work as an [[Chris and English|editor]] for a magazine. I love every day. [[Sonichu's Edge|I run in road races]]. [[Chris and money|Oh, and I shop]]. [[Rosechu|I shop a LOT.]] :) Most importantly, I want that [[Autism|special]] someone I can share my life with and start a family with.

[[Chris and his ego|If you're reading this and you feel like it describes you, I hope you'll email me back!]]

===Characteristics===
Gender: '''Woman''' 
Current Status: '''Single''' 
Looking for: '''Friends, Casual Dating, Long-term Relationship''' 
Body Type: '''Slender, Petite, Curvy''' 
Eyes: '''Hazel''' 
Height: '''5' 03"''' 
Hair Type: '''Red''' 
Age: '''22''' 
Seeks: [[Duck|'''Man for Dating, Man for Friendship''']]

===Profile===
Education: '''College graduate''' 
Ethnicity: '''Caucasian''' 
Religion: '''Unitarian''' 
Political Leanings: '''Independent, Kinky''' 
Neighborhood: '''Charlottesville''' 
City: '''Charlottesville''' 
Occupation: '''Magazine Editor''' 
Have Children: '''No''' 
Want Children: '''Yes'''

===Habits===
Smoking: '''[[Tobacky|Never]]''' 
Drinking: '''[[Alcohol|Sometimes]]''' 
Drugs: '''Not interested'''

===Personality===
I get around town via: '''[[Son-Chu|Car]], Bycicle, Walk''' 
My dietary preferences are: '''[[Nudes|No red meat]]''' 
I spend my free time: '''Reading, Sex, Creating, Working out, [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|Watching movies]], Shopping, Biking, Frisbee Golf''' 
Funniest Thing: '''[[Random Access Humor|A monkey on roller skates]]'''

===Deeper===
'''If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, wo'd be coming?'''
Wilt Chamberlain, [[Anne Boleyn|Queen Elizabeth I]], [[Mailbag_1#Chris_the_inventor|Leonardo Da Vinci]] and Liberace.

'''What's under your bed?''' My old [[PSP|Playstation]]... it's my guilty pleasure!

'''Two books that everybody should read are''' [[Father_Call#Literature_and_health|Of Mice and Men]] and the Great Gatsby.

===Fill It===
I'm an open-minded person, but '''[[Chris and race|big]][[Homos|ot]][[Women's rights|ry]]''' is a deal-breaker.

Design your ideal mate: the brain of a '''[[art|Andy Warhol]]''' and the body of a '''[[Power|Brad Pitt]]'''

People say '''my smile is my best feature'''.

The first section I turn to in the Hook is '''... ask me...'''

The quickest way to my heart is '''[[McDonald's|good cooking]]''' The quickest way to my [[Hanky-panky|bed]] is '''[[51 50|strong, muscly arms]]'''' And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked '''basted'''

The last concert I attented was '''[[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|Crash Test Dummies]]'''

My favorite cartoon as a kid was '''[[Digimon]]'''

'''Dogwood''' is my favorite local festival.

I wouldn't sell '''my body''' for a billion dollars.

'''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Christina Ricci]]''' is the celebrity I've been told I resemble.

'''[[China|P.F. Changs]]''' is my favorite restaurant.

===In and Out===
The Corner or '''[[CWCville Shopping Center|Downtown Mall]]'''

'''Blockbuster''' or Sneak Reviews

'''[[Matthew Noble call|Best Buy]]''' or Sidetracks

'''Wireless''' or Landline

'''Aristocrat''' or Grey Goose

[[100 2269|Beatles]] or '''Stones'''

CD or '''MP3'''

'''Carmike''' or Vinegar Hill

Dogs or '''[[Cats]]'''

'''Summer''' or Winter

[[Niggos|Black]] or '''[[Dirty Crapped Briefs|Brown]]'''

'''[[Long Island Iced Tea|Bars]]''' or [[14 Branchland Court|Stay Home]]

Kroger or '''Whole Food'''

'''PC''' or Mac

'''Wheel of Fortune''' or Grey's Anatomy

Steak or '''[[Pickles|Salad]]'''

Steak or '''Sushi'''

'''Cavaliers''' or [[Cherokian Clan|Redskins]]

'''Casket''' or Cremation

Fax or '''[[Email]]'''

Dyed or '''Natural'''

'''Pumps''' or Flats

'''Beach''' or Mountains

SUV or '''Sedan'''

==First contact==

{{main|Jackie Emails}}

Jackie corresponded with Chris in a series of emails spanning from 5-21 [[April 2010]]. The exchange culminated in a rather disturbing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|video]] outlining Chris's knowledge of cunnilingus in lurid detail.

==A new dawn?==
In early [[September 2010]] his [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|E-Mail exchange with Clyde and Tito]] suggests the possibility of a new sweetheart, but Chris refuses to reveal her name. Furthermore, he uploaded a ''[[ModNation]]'' character generically named 'Sweetheart', which was discussed to be another [[Chloe]] or [[Wallflower]].

On 13 September 2010 Chris uploaded a [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|video]] officially proclaiming his love to Jackie. Three days later, he produced a [[Song for Jackie.MOV|video]] capitalizing on Jackie's love for Canadian band, Crash Test Dummies, while ''[[Chris and race|in blackface]]''. Chris then spent [[October 2010|October]] [[Chris and cosplaying|cosplaying]] as various characters from [[100 2265|The Hamburglar]] to his own [[ECV 00002|Chris-chan]] [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Sonichu]]. It appears that Jackie is fast on her way to becoming the new [[Ivy]].

==Lars==
Lars is Jackie's ex-[[Jerk|boyfriend]], whom Jackie left over his [[PS3#PlayStation Network|ridiculous obsession]] with [[ModNation Racers|model boats]]. Beginning in late [[September 2010]], Chris developed an [[autism|intense fixation]] on Lars and released a number of videos mocking and attacking his erstwhile rival.

Chris's [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|first video addressing Lars]] appeared on 25 September, in which Chris proves who is the bigger and stronger man by smashing a model boat made of [[Lego]]. A [[New Address|second video]] appeared two days later, where Chris gloats over how Lars has lost Jackie, explains how he will fulfill her every desire, and warns Lars not to mess with her — or [[Death threats|Chris will intervene]]. Three days after that, he continued to mock Lars's interest in boats and set to [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4|babbling about tape dispensers]]. (An [[Lars_Is_Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|extended version]] of this third video appeared on 2 October.)

Subsequent videos in the first two weeks of October addressed other subjects, but Chris returned his attention to Lars in a [[100 2281|fourth video]] released in the wee hours of 15 October. There, a drunk Chris sported a [[Wikipedia:Do-rag|do-rag]] and accused Lars of spreading the old rumor that he's a [[homo]].

==Oops, He Did it Again?==
{{quote|We'll be very happy together. I know it. I will make you happy as much as possible. And when you're feeling down, I'll make you feel better. I love you.|Chris, [[Stare|giving the Creepy Stare]] to his beloved.}}
On 30 [[October 2010]], an [[alcohol|inebriated]]-looking Chris posted a [[ToJackie|video]] in which he pleads Jackie to stay with him.

{{Sweethearts}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]

Jackie

2010-10-31T15:34:33Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Personality */

{{quote|And you will be safe, as long as I [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|do not talk]] about you at all online|[[Jackie e-mails|Every good show needs some foreshadowing]]}}

[[Image:JackSweetheart.jpg|thumb|Jackie IRL, note the shirt and bracelet]]
[[Image:ModNation Sweetheart.jpg|thumb|"[[Sweetheart]]" in ''[[ModNation Racers]]'', note the shirt and bracelet]]

'''Jacklyn "Jackie" Romley''' is a woman whom [[Chris]] met on [[The Hook Cafe]]. Not much is known about Jackie other than what's present in a set of emails and a video uploaded by Chris.

==Jackie's Hook Cafe Profile (Username Luv2Jax)==

===Sexy sweetie looking for love===

I'm a little shy about this, but here goes... I'm looking for a guy between about 26-30 (I like my guys a little older, just call me [[Bob Chandler|old fashioned]] I guess) who is tall, has an [[Chris and health|athletic build, straight teeth, and a good smile.]] I don't really care what you do so long as you're [[monthly tugboat|Chandlerdriven]]; I care more about a [[Chris and fashion|nice sense of style]] and [[Fridays After Five|outgoing personality]]. I want [[Virgin with rage|someone who doesn't need to be with someone but wants to because he knows how amazing it can be!]]

Things I like to do, let's see... I love to go biking, it'd be nice if you did too. I love to play golf as well. I like to go out afer work, [[McDonalds|go to dinner]], cook dinner together (I LOVE to cook), spend the weekend [[Chris and rape|at my family's cabin]], travel, road trip and have [[Hanky-Panky|sex]]. Lots and lots of sex. (not gonna [[List of Chris's lies|lie]]!) Probably during some of the activities I just listed... I want that chemistry that is so strong, just a kiss can lead to wanting to have sex right then and there...
I suppose you want to know a little about me, hm?

I'm 5'3", slender, I don't [[Tobacky|smoke]] (HATE it) but I [[Chris's Big Night Out|drink]] once in a while. I graduated college last year and I work as an [[Chris and English|editor]] for a magazine. I love every day. [[Sonichu's Edge|I run in road races]]. [[Chris and money|Oh, and I shop]]. [[Rosechu|I shop a LOT.]] :) Most importantly, I want that [[Autism|special]] someone I can share my life with and start a family with.

[[Chris and his ego|If you're reading this and you feel like it describes you, I hope you'll email me back!]]

===Characteristics===
Gender: '''Woman''' 
Current Status: '''Single''' 
Looking for: '''Friends, Casual Dating, Long-term Relationship''' 
Body Type: '''Slender, Petite, Curvy''' 
Eyes: '''Hazel''' 
Height: '''5' 03"''' 
Hair Type: '''Red''' 
Age: '''22''' 
Seeks: [[Duck|'''Man for Dating, Man for Friendship''']]

===Profile===
Education: '''College graduate''' 
Ethnicity: '''Caucasian''' 
Religion: '''Unitarian''' 
Political Leanings: '''Independent, Kinky''' 
Neighborhood: '''Charlottesville''' 
City: '''Charlottesville''' 
Occupation: '''Magazine Editor''' 
Have Children: '''No''' 
Want Children: '''Yes'''

===Habits===
Smoking: '''[[Tobacky|Never]]''' 
Drinking: '''[[Alcohol|Sometimes]]''' 
Drugs: '''Not interested'''

===Personality===
I get around town via: '''[[Son-Chu|Car]], Bycicle, Walk''' 
My dietary preferences are: '''[[Nudes|No red meat]]''' 
I spend my free time: '''Reading, Sex, Creating, Working out, [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|Watching movies]], Shopping, Biking, Frisbee Golf''' 
Funniest Thing: '''[[Random Access Humor|A monkey on roller skates]]'''

===Deeper===
'''If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, wo'd be coming?'''
Wilt Chamberlain, [[Anne Boleyn|Queen Elizabeth I]], [[Mailbag_1#Chris_the_inventor|Leonardo Da Vinci]] and Liberace.

'''What's under your bed?''' My old [[PSP|Playstation]]... it's my guilty pleasure!

'''Two books that everybody should read are''' [[Father_Call#Literature_and_health|Of Mice and Men]] and the Great Gatsby.

===Fill It===
I'm an open-minded person, but '''[[Chris and race|big]][[Homos|ot]][[Women's rights|ry]]''' is a deal-breaker.

Design your ideal mate: the brain of a '''[[art|Andy Warhol]]''' and the body of a '''[[Power|Brad Pitt]]'''

People say '''my smile is my best feature'''.

The first section I turn to in the Hook is '''... ask me...'''

The quickest way to my heart is '''[[McDonald's|good cooking]]''' The quickest way to my [[Hanky-panky|bed]] is '''[[51 50|strong, muscly arms]]'''' And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked '''basted'''

The last concert I attented was '''[[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|Crash Test Dummies]]'''

My favorite cartoon as a kid was '''[[Digimon]]'''

'''Dogwood''' is my favorite local festival.

I wouldn't sell '''my body''' for a billion dollars.

'''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Christina Ricci]]''' is the celebrity I've been told I resemble.

'''[[China|P.F. Changs]]''' is my favorite restaurant.

===In and Out===
The Corner or '''[[CWCville Shopping Center|Downtown Mall]]'''

'''Blockbuster''' or Sneak Reviews

'''[[Matthew Noble call|Best Buy]]''' or Sidetracks

'''Wireless''' or Landline

'''Aristocrat''' or Grey Goose

[[100 2269|Beatles]] or '''Stones'''

CD or '''MP3'''

'''Carmike''' or Vinegar Hill

Dogs or '''[[Cats]]'''

'''Summer''' or Winter

[[Niggos|Black]] or '''[[Dirty Crapped Briefs|Brown]]'''

'''[[Long Island Iced Tea|Bars]]''' or [[14 Branchland Court|Stay Home]]

Kroger or '''Whole Food'''

'''PC''' or Mac

'''Wheel of Fortune''' or Grey's Anatomy

Steak or '''[[Pickles|Salad]]'''

Steak or '''Sushi'''

'''Cavaliers''' or [[Cherokian Clan|Redskins]]

'''Casket''' or Cremation

Fax or '''[[Email]]'''

Dyed or '''Natural'''

'''Pumps''' or Flats

'''Beach''' or Mountains

SUV or '''Sedan'''

==First contact==

{{main|Jackie Emails}}

Jackie corresponded with Chris in a series of emails spanning from 5-21 [[April 2010]]. The exchange culminated in a rather disturbing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|video]] outlining Chris's knowledge of cunnilingus in lurid detail.

==A new dawn?==
In early [[September 2010]] his [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|E-Mail exchange with Clyde and Tito]] suggests the possibility of a new sweetheart, but Chris refuses to reveal her name. Furthermore, he uploaded a ''[[ModNation]]'' character generically named 'Sweetheart', which was discussed to be another [[Chloe]] or [[Wallflower]].

On 13 September 2010 Chris uploaded a [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|video]] officially proclaiming his love to Jackie. Three days later, he produced a [[Song for Jackie.MOV|video]] capitalizing on Jackie's love for Canadian band, Crash Test Dummies, while ''[[Chris and race|in blackface]]''. Chris then spent [[October 2010|October]] [[Chris and cosplaying|cosplaying]] as various characters from [[100 2265|The Hamburglar]] to his own [[ECV 00002|Chris-chan]] [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Sonichu]]. It appears that Jackie is fast on her way to becoming the new [[Ivy]].

==Lars==
Lars is Jackie's ex-[[Jerk|boyfriend]], whom Jackie left over his [[PS3#PlayStation Network|ridiculous obsession]] with [[ModNation Racers|model boats]]. Beginning in late [[September 2010]], Chris developed an [[autism|intense fixation]] on Lars and released a number of videos mocking and attacking his erstwhile rival.

Chris's [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|first video addressing Lars]] appeared on 25 September, in which Chris proves who is the bigger and stronger man by smashing a model boat made of [[Lego]]. A [[New Address|second video]] appeared two days later, where Chris gloats over how Lars has lost Jackie, explains how he will fulfill her every desire, and warns Lars not to mess with her — or [[Death threats|Chris will intervene]]. Three days after that, he continued to mock Lars's interest in boats and set to [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4|babbling about tape dispensers]]. (An [[Lars_Is_Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|extended version]] of this third video appeared on 2 October.)

Subsequent videos in the first two weeks of October addressed other subjects, but Chris returned his attention to Lars in a [[100 2281|fourth video]] released in the wee hours of 15 October. There, a drunk Chris sported a [[Wikipedia:Do-rag|do-rag]] and accused Lars of spreading the old rumor that he's a [[homo]].

==Oops, He Did it Again?==
{{quote|We'll be very happy together. I know it. I will make you happy as much as possible. And when you're feeling down, I'll make you feel better. I love you.|Chris, [[Stare|giving the Creepy Stare]] to his beloved.}}
On 30 [[October 2010]], an [[alcohol|inebriated]]-looking Chris posted a [[ToJackie|video]] in which he pleads Jackie to stay with him.

{{Sweethearts}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]

Jackie

2010-10-31T15:34:10Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Personality */

{{quote|And you will be safe, as long as I [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|do not talk]] about you at all online|[[Jackie e-mails|Every good show needs some foreshadowing]]}}

[[Image:JackSweetheart.jpg|thumb|Jackie IRL, note the shirt and bracelet]]
[[Image:ModNation Sweetheart.jpg|thumb|"[[Sweetheart]]" in ''[[ModNation Racers]]'', note the shirt and bracelet]]

'''Jacklyn "Jackie" Romley''' is a woman whom [[Chris]] met on [[The Hook Cafe]]. Not much is known about Jackie other than what's present in a set of emails and a video uploaded by Chris.

==Jackie's Hook Cafe Profile (Username Luv2Jax)==

===Sexy sweetie looking for love===

I'm a little shy about this, but here goes... I'm looking for a guy between about 26-30 (I like my guys a little older, just call me [[Bob Chandler|old fashioned]] I guess) who is tall, has an [[Chris and health|athletic build, straight teeth, and a good smile.]] I don't really care what you do so long as you're [[monthly tugboat|Chandlerdriven]]; I care more about a [[Chris and fashion|nice sense of style]] and [[Fridays After Five|outgoing personality]]. I want [[Virgin with rage|someone who doesn't need to be with someone but wants to because he knows how amazing it can be!]]

Things I like to do, let's see... I love to go biking, it'd be nice if you did too. I love to play golf as well. I like to go out afer work, [[McDonalds|go to dinner]], cook dinner together (I LOVE to cook), spend the weekend [[Chris and rape|at my family's cabin]], travel, road trip and have [[Hanky-Panky|sex]]. Lots and lots of sex. (not gonna [[List of Chris's lies|lie]]!) Probably during some of the activities I just listed... I want that chemistry that is so strong, just a kiss can lead to wanting to have sex right then and there...
I suppose you want to know a little about me, hm?

I'm 5'3", slender, I don't [[Tobacky|smoke]] (HATE it) but I [[Chris's Big Night Out|drink]] once in a while. I graduated college last year and I work as an [[Chris and English|editor]] for a magazine. I love every day. [[Sonichu's Edge|I run in road races]]. [[Chris and money|Oh, and I shop]]. [[Rosechu|I shop a LOT.]] :) Most importantly, I want that [[Autism|special]] someone I can share my life with and start a family with.

[[Chris and his ego|If you're reading this and you feel like it describes you, I hope you'll email me back!]]

===Characteristics===
Gender: '''Woman''' 
Current Status: '''Single''' 
Looking for: '''Friends, Casual Dating, Long-term Relationship''' 
Body Type: '''Slender, Petite, Curvy''' 
Eyes: '''Hazel''' 
Height: '''5' 03"''' 
Hair Type: '''Red''' 
Age: '''22''' 
Seeks: [[Duck|'''Man for Dating, Man for Friendship''']]

===Profile===
Education: '''College graduate''' 
Ethnicity: '''Caucasian''' 
Religion: '''Unitarian''' 
Political Leanings: '''Independent, Kinky''' 
Neighborhood: '''Charlottesville''' 
City: '''Charlottesville''' 
Occupation: '''Magazine Editor''' 
Have Children: '''No''' 
Want Children: '''Yes'''

===Habits===
Smoking: '''[[Tobacky|Never]]''' 
Drinking: '''[[Alcohol|Sometimes]]''' 
Drugs: '''Not interested'''

===Personality===
I get around town via: '''[[Son-Chu|Car]], Bycicle, Walk''' 
My dietary preferences are: '''[[Nudes|No red meat]]''' 
I spend my free time: '''Reading, Sex, Creating, Working out, Watching movies, Shopping, Biking, Frisbee Golf''' 
Funniest Thing: '''[[Random Access Humor|A monkey on roller skates]]'''

===Deeper===
'''If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, wo'd be coming?'''
Wilt Chamberlain, [[Anne Boleyn|Queen Elizabeth I]], [[Mailbag_1#Chris_the_inventor|Leonardo Da Vinci]] and Liberace.

'''What's under your bed?''' My old [[PSP|Playstation]]... it's my guilty pleasure!

'''Two books that everybody should read are''' [[Father_Call#Literature_and_health|Of Mice and Men]] and the Great Gatsby.

===Fill It===
I'm an open-minded person, but '''[[Chris and race|big]][[Homos|ot]][[Women's rights|ry]]''' is a deal-breaker.

Design your ideal mate: the brain of a '''[[art|Andy Warhol]]''' and the body of a '''[[Power|Brad Pitt]]'''

People say '''my smile is my best feature'''.

The first section I turn to in the Hook is '''... ask me...'''

The quickest way to my heart is '''[[McDonald's|good cooking]]''' The quickest way to my [[Hanky-panky|bed]] is '''[[51 50|strong, muscly arms]]'''' And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked '''basted'''

The last concert I attented was '''[[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|Crash Test Dummies]]'''

My favorite cartoon as a kid was '''[[Digimon]]'''

'''Dogwood''' is my favorite local festival.

I wouldn't sell '''my body''' for a billion dollars.

'''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Christina Ricci]]''' is the celebrity I've been told I resemble.

'''[[China|P.F. Changs]]''' is my favorite restaurant.

===In and Out===
The Corner or '''[[CWCville Shopping Center|Downtown Mall]]'''

'''Blockbuster''' or Sneak Reviews

'''[[Matthew Noble call|Best Buy]]''' or Sidetracks

'''Wireless''' or Landline

'''Aristocrat''' or Grey Goose

[[100 2269|Beatles]] or '''Stones'''

CD or '''MP3'''

'''Carmike''' or Vinegar Hill

Dogs or '''[[Cats]]'''

'''Summer''' or Winter

[[Niggos|Black]] or '''[[Dirty Crapped Briefs|Brown]]'''

'''[[Long Island Iced Tea|Bars]]''' or [[14 Branchland Court|Stay Home]]

Kroger or '''Whole Food'''

'''PC''' or Mac

'''Wheel of Fortune''' or Grey's Anatomy

Steak or '''[[Pickles|Salad]]'''

Steak or '''Sushi'''

'''Cavaliers''' or [[Cherokian Clan|Redskins]]

'''Casket''' or Cremation

Fax or '''[[Email]]'''

Dyed or '''Natural'''

'''Pumps''' or Flats

'''Beach''' or Mountains

SUV or '''Sedan'''

==First contact==

{{main|Jackie Emails}}

Jackie corresponded with Chris in a series of emails spanning from 5-21 [[April 2010]]. The exchange culminated in a rather disturbing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|video]] outlining Chris's knowledge of cunnilingus in lurid detail.

==A new dawn?==
In early [[September 2010]] his [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|E-Mail exchange with Clyde and Tito]] suggests the possibility of a new sweetheart, but Chris refuses to reveal her name. Furthermore, he uploaded a ''[[ModNation]]'' character generically named 'Sweetheart', which was discussed to be another [[Chloe]] or [[Wallflower]].

On 13 September 2010 Chris uploaded a [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|video]] officially proclaiming his love to Jackie. Three days later, he produced a [[Song for Jackie.MOV|video]] capitalizing on Jackie's love for Canadian band, Crash Test Dummies, while ''[[Chris and race|in blackface]]''. Chris then spent [[October 2010|October]] [[Chris and cosplaying|cosplaying]] as various characters from [[100 2265|The Hamburglar]] to his own [[ECV 00002|Chris-chan]] [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Sonichu]]. It appears that Jackie is fast on her way to becoming the new [[Ivy]].

==Lars==
Lars is Jackie's ex-[[Jerk|boyfriend]], whom Jackie left over his [[PS3#PlayStation Network|ridiculous obsession]] with [[ModNation Racers|model boats]]. Beginning in late [[September 2010]], Chris developed an [[autism|intense fixation]] on Lars and released a number of videos mocking and attacking his erstwhile rival.

Chris's [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|first video addressing Lars]] appeared on 25 September, in which Chris proves who is the bigger and stronger man by smashing a model boat made of [[Lego]]. A [[New Address|second video]] appeared two days later, where Chris gloats over how Lars has lost Jackie, explains how he will fulfill her every desire, and warns Lars not to mess with her — or [[Death threats|Chris will intervene]]. Three days after that, he continued to mock Lars's interest in boats and set to [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4|babbling about tape dispensers]]. (An [[Lars_Is_Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|extended version]] of this third video appeared on 2 October.)

Subsequent videos in the first two weeks of October addressed other subjects, but Chris returned his attention to Lars in a [[100 2281|fourth video]] released in the wee hours of 15 October. There, a drunk Chris sported a [[Wikipedia:Do-rag|do-rag]] and accused Lars of spreading the old rumor that he's a [[homo]].

==Oops, He Did it Again?==
{{quote|We'll be very happy together. I know it. I will make you happy as much as possible. And when you're feeling down, I'll make you feel better. I love you.|Chris, [[Stare|giving the Creepy Stare]] to his beloved.}}
On 30 [[October 2010]], an [[alcohol|inebriated]]-looking Chris posted a [[ToJackie|video]] in which he pleads Jackie to stay with him.

{{Sweethearts}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]

Jackie

2010-10-31T15:33:21Z

Travis Cwckle: /* In and Out */

{{quote|And you will be safe, as long as I [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|do not talk]] about you at all online|[[Jackie e-mails|Every good show needs some foreshadowing]]}}

[[Image:JackSweetheart.jpg|thumb|Jackie IRL, note the shirt and bracelet]]
[[Image:ModNation Sweetheart.jpg|thumb|"[[Sweetheart]]" in ''[[ModNation Racers]]'', note the shirt and bracelet]]

'''Jacklyn "Jackie" Romley''' is a woman whom [[Chris]] met on [[The Hook Cafe]]. Not much is known about Jackie other than what's present in a set of emails and a video uploaded by Chris.

==Jackie's Hook Cafe Profile (Username Luv2Jax)==

===Sexy sweetie looking for love===

I'm a little shy about this, but here goes... I'm looking for a guy between about 26-30 (I like my guys a little older, just call me [[Bob Chandler|old fashioned]] I guess) who is tall, has an [[Chris and health|athletic build, straight teeth, and a good smile.]] I don't really care what you do so long as you're [[monthly tugboat|Chandlerdriven]]; I care more about a [[Chris and fashion|nice sense of style]] and [[Fridays After Five|outgoing personality]]. I want [[Virgin with rage|someone who doesn't need to be with someone but wants to because he knows how amazing it can be!]]

Things I like to do, let's see... I love to go biking, it'd be nice if you did too. I love to play golf as well. I like to go out afer work, [[McDonalds|go to dinner]], cook dinner together (I LOVE to cook), spend the weekend [[Chris and rape|at my family's cabin]], travel, road trip and have [[Hanky-Panky|sex]]. Lots and lots of sex. (not gonna [[List of Chris's lies|lie]]!) Probably during some of the activities I just listed... I want that chemistry that is so strong, just a kiss can lead to wanting to have sex right then and there...
I suppose you want to know a little about me, hm?

I'm 5'3", slender, I don't [[Tobacky|smoke]] (HATE it) but I [[Chris's Big Night Out|drink]] once in a while. I graduated college last year and I work as an [[Chris and English|editor]] for a magazine. I love every day. [[Sonichu's Edge|I run in road races]]. [[Chris and money|Oh, and I shop]]. [[Rosechu|I shop a LOT.]] :) Most importantly, I want that [[Autism|special]] someone I can share my life with and start a family with.

[[Chris and his ego|If you're reading this and you feel like it describes you, I hope you'll email me back!]]

===Characteristics===
Gender: '''Woman''' 
Current Status: '''Single''' 
Looking for: '''Friends, Casual Dating, Long-term Relationship''' 
Body Type: '''Slender, Petite, Curvy''' 
Eyes: '''Hazel''' 
Height: '''5' 03"''' 
Hair Type: '''Red''' 
Age: '''22''' 
Seeks: [[Duck|'''Man for Dating, Man for Friendship''']]

===Profile===
Education: '''College graduate''' 
Ethnicity: '''Caucasian''' 
Religion: '''Unitarian''' 
Political Leanings: '''Independent, Kinky''' 
Neighborhood: '''Charlottesville''' 
City: '''Charlottesville''' 
Occupation: '''Magazine Editor''' 
Have Children: '''No''' 
Want Children: '''Yes'''

===Habits===
Smoking: '''[[Tobacky|Never]]''' 
Drinking: '''[[Alcohol|Sometimes]]''' 
Drugs: '''Not interested'''

===Personality===
I get around town via: '''Car, Bycicle, Walk''' 
My dietary preferences are: '''[[Nudes|No red meat]]''' 
I spend my free time: '''Reading, Sex, Creating, Working out, Watching movies, Shopping, Biking, Frisbee Golf''' 
Funniest Thing: '''[[Random Access Humor|A monkey on roller skates]]'''

===Deeper===
'''If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, wo'd be coming?'''
Wilt Chamberlain, [[Anne Boleyn|Queen Elizabeth I]], [[Mailbag_1#Chris_the_inventor|Leonardo Da Vinci]] and Liberace.

'''What's under your bed?''' My old [[PSP|Playstation]]... it's my guilty pleasure!

'''Two books that everybody should read are''' [[Father_Call#Literature_and_health|Of Mice and Men]] and the Great Gatsby.

===Fill It===
I'm an open-minded person, but '''[[Chris and race|big]][[Homos|ot]][[Women's rights|ry]]''' is a deal-breaker.

Design your ideal mate: the brain of a '''[[art|Andy Warhol]]''' and the body of a '''[[Power|Brad Pitt]]'''

People say '''my smile is my best feature'''.

The first section I turn to in the Hook is '''... ask me...'''

The quickest way to my heart is '''[[McDonald's|good cooking]]''' The quickest way to my [[Hanky-panky|bed]] is '''[[51 50|strong, muscly arms]]'''' And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked '''basted'''

The last concert I attented was '''[[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|Crash Test Dummies]]'''

My favorite cartoon as a kid was '''[[Digimon]]'''

'''Dogwood''' is my favorite local festival.

I wouldn't sell '''my body''' for a billion dollars.

'''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Christina Ricci]]''' is the celebrity I've been told I resemble.

'''[[China|P.F. Changs]]''' is my favorite restaurant.

===In and Out===
The Corner or '''[[CWCville Shopping Center|Downtown Mall]]'''

'''Blockbuster''' or Sneak Reviews

'''[[Matthew Noble call|Best Buy]]''' or Sidetracks

'''Wireless''' or Landline

'''Aristocrat''' or Grey Goose

[[100 2269|Beatles]] or '''Stones'''

CD or '''MP3'''

'''Carmike''' or Vinegar Hill

Dogs or '''[[Cats]]'''

'''Summer''' or Winter

[[Niggos|Black]] or '''[[Dirty Crapped Briefs|Brown]]'''

'''[[Long Island Iced Tea|Bars]]''' or [[14 Branchland Court|Stay Home]]

Kroger or '''Whole Food'''

'''PC''' or Mac

'''Wheel of Fortune''' or Grey's Anatomy

Steak or '''[[Pickles|Salad]]'''

Steak or '''Sushi'''

'''Cavaliers''' or [[Cherokian Clan|Redskins]]

'''Casket''' or Cremation

Fax or '''[[Email]]'''

Dyed or '''Natural'''

'''Pumps''' or Flats

'''Beach''' or Mountains

SUV or '''Sedan'''

==First contact==

{{main|Jackie Emails}}

Jackie corresponded with Chris in a series of emails spanning from 5-21 [[April 2010]]. The exchange culminated in a rather disturbing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|video]] outlining Chris's knowledge of cunnilingus in lurid detail.

==A new dawn?==
In early [[September 2010]] his [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|E-Mail exchange with Clyde and Tito]] suggests the possibility of a new sweetheart, but Chris refuses to reveal her name. Furthermore, he uploaded a ''[[ModNation]]'' character generically named 'Sweetheart', which was discussed to be another [[Chloe]] or [[Wallflower]].

On 13 September 2010 Chris uploaded a [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|video]] officially proclaiming his love to Jackie. Three days later, he produced a [[Song for Jackie.MOV|video]] capitalizing on Jackie's love for Canadian band, Crash Test Dummies, while ''[[Chris and race|in blackface]]''. Chris then spent [[October 2010|October]] [[Chris and cosplaying|cosplaying]] as various characters from [[100 2265|The Hamburglar]] to his own [[ECV 00002|Chris-chan]] [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Sonichu]]. It appears that Jackie is fast on her way to becoming the new [[Ivy]].

==Lars==
Lars is Jackie's ex-[[Jerk|boyfriend]], whom Jackie left over his [[PS3#PlayStation Network|ridiculous obsession]] with [[ModNation Racers|model boats]]. Beginning in late [[September 2010]], Chris developed an [[autism|intense fixation]] on Lars and released a number of videos mocking and attacking his erstwhile rival.

Chris's [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|first video addressing Lars]] appeared on 25 September, in which Chris proves who is the bigger and stronger man by smashing a model boat made of [[Lego]]. A [[New Address|second video]] appeared two days later, where Chris gloats over how Lars has lost Jackie, explains how he will fulfill her every desire, and warns Lars not to mess with her — or [[Death threats|Chris will intervene]]. Three days after that, he continued to mock Lars's interest in boats and set to [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4|babbling about tape dispensers]]. (An [[Lars_Is_Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|extended version]] of this third video appeared on 2 October.)

Subsequent videos in the first two weeks of October addressed other subjects, but Chris returned his attention to Lars in a [[100 2281|fourth video]] released in the wee hours of 15 October. There, a drunk Chris sported a [[Wikipedia:Do-rag|do-rag]] and accused Lars of spreading the old rumor that he's a [[homo]].

==Oops, He Did it Again?==
{{quote|We'll be very happy together. I know it. I will make you happy as much as possible. And when you're feeling down, I'll make you feel better. I love you.|Chris, [[Stare|giving the Creepy Stare]] to his beloved.}}
On 30 [[October 2010]], an [[alcohol|inebriated]]-looking Chris posted a [[ToJackie|video]] in which he pleads Jackie to stay with him.

{{Sweethearts}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]

Jackie

2010-10-31T15:32:37Z

Travis Cwckle: /* In and Out */

{{quote|And you will be safe, as long as I [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|do not talk]] about you at all online|[[Jackie e-mails|Every good show needs some foreshadowing]]}}

[[Image:JackSweetheart.jpg|thumb|Jackie IRL, note the shirt and bracelet]]
[[Image:ModNation Sweetheart.jpg|thumb|"[[Sweetheart]]" in ''[[ModNation Racers]]'', note the shirt and bracelet]]

'''Jacklyn "Jackie" Romley''' is a woman whom [[Chris]] met on [[The Hook Cafe]]. Not much is known about Jackie other than what's present in a set of emails and a video uploaded by Chris.

==Jackie's Hook Cafe Profile (Username Luv2Jax)==

===Sexy sweetie looking for love===

I'm a little shy about this, but here goes... I'm looking for a guy between about 26-30 (I like my guys a little older, just call me [[Bob Chandler|old fashioned]] I guess) who is tall, has an [[Chris and health|athletic build, straight teeth, and a good smile.]] I don't really care what you do so long as you're [[monthly tugboat|Chandlerdriven]]; I care more about a [[Chris and fashion|nice sense of style]] and [[Fridays After Five|outgoing personality]]. I want [[Virgin with rage|someone who doesn't need to be with someone but wants to because he knows how amazing it can be!]]

Things I like to do, let's see... I love to go biking, it'd be nice if you did too. I love to play golf as well. I like to go out afer work, [[McDonalds|go to dinner]], cook dinner together (I LOVE to cook), spend the weekend [[Chris and rape|at my family's cabin]], travel, road trip and have [[Hanky-Panky|sex]]. Lots and lots of sex. (not gonna [[List of Chris's lies|lie]]!) Probably during some of the activities I just listed... I want that chemistry that is so strong, just a kiss can lead to wanting to have sex right then and there...
I suppose you want to know a little about me, hm?

I'm 5'3", slender, I don't [[Tobacky|smoke]] (HATE it) but I [[Chris's Big Night Out|drink]] once in a while. I graduated college last year and I work as an [[Chris and English|editor]] for a magazine. I love every day. [[Sonichu's Edge|I run in road races]]. [[Chris and money|Oh, and I shop]]. [[Rosechu|I shop a LOT.]] :) Most importantly, I want that [[Autism|special]] someone I can share my life with and start a family with.

[[Chris and his ego|If you're reading this and you feel like it describes you, I hope you'll email me back!]]

===Characteristics===
Gender: '''Woman''' 
Current Status: '''Single''' 
Looking for: '''Friends, Casual Dating, Long-term Relationship''' 
Body Type: '''Slender, Petite, Curvy''' 
Eyes: '''Hazel''' 
Height: '''5' 03"''' 
Hair Type: '''Red''' 
Age: '''22''' 
Seeks: [[Duck|'''Man for Dating, Man for Friendship''']]

===Profile===
Education: '''College graduate''' 
Ethnicity: '''Caucasian''' 
Religion: '''Unitarian''' 
Political Leanings: '''Independent, Kinky''' 
Neighborhood: '''Charlottesville''' 
City: '''Charlottesville''' 
Occupation: '''Magazine Editor''' 
Have Children: '''No''' 
Want Children: '''Yes'''

===Habits===
Smoking: '''[[Tobacky|Never]]''' 
Drinking: '''[[Alcohol|Sometimes]]''' 
Drugs: '''Not interested'''

===Personality===
I get around town via: '''Car, Bycicle, Walk''' 
My dietary preferences are: '''[[Nudes|No red meat]]''' 
I spend my free time: '''Reading, Sex, Creating, Working out, Watching movies, Shopping, Biking, Frisbee Golf''' 
Funniest Thing: '''[[Random Access Humor|A monkey on roller skates]]'''

===Deeper===
'''If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, wo'd be coming?'''
Wilt Chamberlain, [[Anne Boleyn|Queen Elizabeth I]], [[Mailbag_1#Chris_the_inventor|Leonardo Da Vinci]] and Liberace.

'''What's under your bed?''' My old [[PSP|Playstation]]... it's my guilty pleasure!

'''Two books that everybody should read are''' [[Father_Call#Literature_and_health|Of Mice and Men]] and the Great Gatsby.

===Fill It===
I'm an open-minded person, but '''[[Chris and race|big]][[Homos|ot]][[Women's rights|ry]]''' is a deal-breaker.

Design your ideal mate: the brain of a '''[[art|Andy Warhol]]''' and the body of a '''[[Power|Brad Pitt]]'''

People say '''my smile is my best feature'''.

The first section I turn to in the Hook is '''... ask me...'''

The quickest way to my heart is '''[[McDonald's|good cooking]]''' The quickest way to my [[Hanky-panky|bed]] is '''[[51 50|strong, muscly arms]]'''' And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked '''basted'''

The last concert I attented was '''[[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|Crash Test Dummies]]'''

My favorite cartoon as a kid was '''[[Digimon]]'''

'''Dogwood''' is my favorite local festival.

I wouldn't sell '''my body''' for a billion dollars.

'''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Christina Ricci]]''' is the celebrity I've been told I resemble.

'''[[China|P.F. Changs]]''' is my favorite restaurant.

===In and Out===
The Corner or '''[[CWCville Shopping Center|Downtown Mall]]'''

'''Blockbuster''' or Sneak Reviews

'''[[Matthew Noble call|Best Buy]]''' or Sidetracks

'''Wireless''' or Landline

'''Aristocrat''' or Grey Goose

[[100 2269|Beatles]] or '''Stones'''

CD or '''MP3'''

'''Carmike''' or Vinegar Hill

Dogs or '''[[Cats]]'''

'''Summer''' or Winter

[[Niggos|Black]] or '''[[Dirty Crapped Briefs|Brown]]'''

'''[[Long Island Iced Tea|Bars]]''' or [[14 Branchland Court|Stay Home]]

Kroger or '''Whole Food'''

'''PC''' or Mac

'''Wheel of Fortune''' or Grey's Anatomy

Steak or '''[[Pickles|Salad]]'''

Steak or '''Sushi'''

'''Cavaliers''' or [[Cherokian clan|Redskins]]

'''Casket''' or Cremation

Fax or '''[[Email]]'''

Dyed or '''Natural'''

'''Pumps''' or Flats

'''Beach''' or Mountains

SUV or '''Sedan'''

==First contact==

{{main|Jackie Emails}}

Jackie corresponded with Chris in a series of emails spanning from 5-21 [[April 2010]]. The exchange culminated in a rather disturbing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|video]] outlining Chris's knowledge of cunnilingus in lurid detail.

==A new dawn?==
In early [[September 2010]] his [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|E-Mail exchange with Clyde and Tito]] suggests the possibility of a new sweetheart, but Chris refuses to reveal her name. Furthermore, he uploaded a ''[[ModNation]]'' character generically named 'Sweetheart', which was discussed to be another [[Chloe]] or [[Wallflower]].

On 13 September 2010 Chris uploaded a [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|video]] officially proclaiming his love to Jackie. Three days later, he produced a [[Song for Jackie.MOV|video]] capitalizing on Jackie's love for Canadian band, Crash Test Dummies, while ''[[Chris and race|in blackface]]''. Chris then spent [[October 2010|October]] [[Chris and cosplaying|cosplaying]] as various characters from [[100 2265|The Hamburglar]] to his own [[ECV 00002|Chris-chan]] [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Sonichu]]. It appears that Jackie is fast on her way to becoming the new [[Ivy]].

==Lars==
Lars is Jackie's ex-[[Jerk|boyfriend]], whom Jackie left over his [[PS3#PlayStation Network|ridiculous obsession]] with [[ModNation Racers|model boats]]. Beginning in late [[September 2010]], Chris developed an [[autism|intense fixation]] on Lars and released a number of videos mocking and attacking his erstwhile rival.

Chris's [[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|first video addressing Lars]] appeared on 25 September, in which Chris proves who is the bigger and stronger man by smashing a model boat made of [[Lego]]. A [[New Address|second video]] appeared two days later, where Chris gloats over how Lars has lost Jackie, explains how he will fulfill her every desire, and warns Lars not to mess with her — or [[Death threats|Chris will intervene]]. Three days after that, he continued to mock Lars's interest in boats and set to [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4|babbling about tape dispensers]]. (An [[Lars_Is_Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|extended version]] of this third video appeared on 2 October.)

Subsequent videos in the first two weeks of October addressed other subjects, but Chris returned his attention to Lars in a [[100 2281|fourth video]] released in the wee hours of 15 October. There, a drunk Chris sported a [[Wikipedia:Do-rag|do-rag]] and accused Lars of spreading the old rumor that he's a [[homo]].

==Oops, He Did it Again?==
{{quote|We'll be very happy together. I know it. I will make you happy as much as possible. And when you're feeling down, I'll make you feel better. I love you.|Chris, [[Stare|giving the Creepy Stare]] to his beloved.}}
On 30 [[October 2010]], an [[alcohol|inebriated]]-looking Chris posted a [[ToJackie|video]] in which he pleads Jackie to stay with him.

{{Sweethearts}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]

ToJackie

2010-10-31T04:33:04Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''ToJackie''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris begs [[Jackie]] not to leave him, insisting that she matters more than [[video games]], that he can [[Random access humor|make her laugh]], and that no other [[Sex toys|non-living]] [[PS3|object]] can replace her.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = ToJackie
| video = {{#ev:youtube|53pObVcCj2s}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Galpals|text}}
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Comedy|text}}, {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = {{BrickFestShirt|Grey T-shirt}}
| previous = [[Ghostbusters (video)|Ghostbusters]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:I_want_you_Jackie.jpg|thumb|right|100px|How can you say no to that [[stare]]?]]

''[Chris performs a dramatic glasses removal.]''

Listen. Jackie? I gotta— I gotta tell it to you straight. I mean, yeah. I have been doing these videos and everything FOR YOU. I put— I've given you so much time and energy. I want you to know that… it is all good. I am being honest with you. I have been honest with you. Sometimes, I have misspoke. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. [[Chris and religion|Hand to God. And on my Bible]]. I'd have to go look for it.

''[Chris turns around, looking for his Bible.]''

It's right over— here it is.

''[Chris picks up a book, presumably the Bible, judging by the gold leaf on the pages.]''

Yeah, look. Hand on my Bible. I swear to God. I love you more than any— more than anything, Jackie. I love you more than anything.

''[Chris puts the Bible down.]''

And, plus, I'll be able to make you laugh. Make you more happy. Make you smile a lot more, after we meet— after we get together. I mean—

''[Chris turns around, shoves fake breasts down his shirt, and turns around again.]''

Hey, look. This is fun.

''[Chris imitates his [[WelcometoBollywood|belly dancing]].]''

We can feel each other up, ya know?

''[Chris bends over to show his breasts.]''

Hey, look. How do you like lookin' down at ''my'' cleavage? (Chris laughs.) I'll make you smile, make you happy. [Chris removes the fake breasts.] You know I will, because I love you. I love you a lot.

''[Chris pauses and slouches down.]''

And do— and there ain't no— there's nothing else in the world, 'cept outside my family. (Chris noticeably sighs.) You know, 'cause, you know, I gotta— I gotta respect my mom and dad. But no [[sonichu (game)|video game]], no high score or no dang [[PS3|console]] is going to go over you, because I love you so much more. You can return the feelings and emotions. No dang— non-living object can ever do that. I swear.

''[Chris stands up straight, leans forward and grabs the camera.]''

We'll be very happy together. I know it. I will make you happy as much as possible. And when you're feeling down, I'll make you feel better. I love you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Ghostbusters (video)|Ghostbusters]]|nextlink=Current}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

DivineTrial

2010-10-31T04:31:12Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''DivineTrial''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris dresses up as Divine from the 1972 cult film [[Wikipedia:Pink Flamingos|''Pink Flamingos'']], and then re-enacts the trial scene from the movie with [[Clyde Cash]] as the culprit.

It should be noted that the actor who played the role of Divine in the movie is a [[Muscle_bra|crossdresser]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = DivineTrial
| video = {{#ev:youtube|QAvNrc1A9VI}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Violence|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}
| previous = [[DrainedCreativity]]
| next = [[JuggaloShoutOut]]
}}

===Transcript===

[''Chris stands in front of the camera wearing clown makeup, his shirt stuffed with his [[plush breasts]] and a red sheet of construction paper covering his crotch.'']

Hello, folks, and darlings, this is [[Homos|Divine]] Babs y'know... We are going to go on a trial now fo- to go against... our culprit, here- mister Clyde Cash... Say hello to the audience, Clyde.

[''Chris holds up a [[Shadow the Hedgehog]] doll which is supposed to represent Clyde.'']

'''Clyde:''' ''*mumbling noises*''

Ay, ain't got much to say, huh? Well, that's a shame. Clyde, now, you spoke to me on live Internet before the trial here was started.

'''Clyde:''' ''*mumbling noises*''

He stands accused of... being a [[troll]], a bully, and especially doing all these things against one Christian Weston Chandler and his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Sonichu and Rosechu family]]... We bring in a witness here today... a which we will put that against Mr. Clyde Cash here... He's a witness- oh- s- Sonichu, I mean the original one...

[''Chris holds up a [[Pikachu]] doll, modified to resemble Sonichu.'']

All right, Sonichu... do you swear to speak the whole truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth... so help you God?

'''Sonichu:''' I do.

Alright, then will you please... point out the guilty party of this room that has... done all the trollings and dwollings and all that... and even personal... threatening and what not against Mr. Christian Weston Chandler?

'''Sonichu:''' Yes, [[Wikipedia:Divine (actor)|Divine]]. He's right over there! Mr. Clyde Cash!

Thank you, that'll be all, you c- may step down from the witness stand... Alright, then we will now have order in the court, order in the court! [''Bangs the table with a coffee cup''] I have reviewed all the case files and what not... and in this [[Sonichu 10|kangaroo court]] justice... I hearby... pronounce sentence to Mr. Clyde Cash... he is gulity of all charges! And then- and... on the lawsuit here... for his punishment... he will be shocked to death... and his wi- and [[PandaHalo|his wife]] and [[4-cent_garbage.com|one-cent daughter]]... [[Women's rights|will go to a better husband...]] outside of his family... one will be provided for her by law... somebody within her local reach, but not within the state of [[Virginia]].

But anyway, the punishment is death for Mr. Clyde Cash... For doing so many wrongs against Mr. Christian Weston Chandler... Case dismissed! [''Bangs the table with his coffee cup again'']

Are you ready for your execution, Mr. Clyde Cash?

'''Clyde:''' ''*mumbling noises*''

[[Random Access Humor|Well, at least my face ain't fucking orange!]] Buh-bye.

[''Chris pulls out his [[Megatron pistol]] and shoots Clyde, despite him being sentenced to electrocution.'']

And that was another fine episode of Divine's people court. You all enjoy- you all have yourselves a good day... and remember, Divine is... [[Christian Weston Chandler|the filthiest, dirtiest person in the world]]... Even though I've temporarily dyed my [[hair]] brown... It's usually blonde.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[DrainedCreativity]]|nextlink=[[JuggaloShoutOut]]}}

{{Cosplay videos}}
{{Troll Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

HairDifference

2010-10-31T04:23:40Z

Travis Cwckle:

'''HairDifference''' are two videos [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. The first video shows Chris's [[Hair|hair]] which hasn't been washed in a "few days", and the second video shows the hair after it has been washed with some "good [[Axe]]... shampoo, conditioner and anti-dandruff". To the surprise of no one, his hair, when washed, looks just as horrendous as it does unwashed.

==HairDifferenceBefore==

{{Infobox/video
| name = HairDifferenceBefore
| video = {{#ev:youtube|w3OvGwRo1kY}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other| Hygiene}}, {{Rumors|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| saga =
| previous = [[JuggaloShoutOut]]
| next = [[#HairDifferenceAfter|HairDifferenceAfter]]
}}

===Transcript===

All right, it's uh... it's Thurs- it's Thursday thee... what is it, uh... oh, yeah, the 28, and I have been a few days without a shower, because the shower has been [[Chris and English|unaccessible]] to me, so my hair is currently in a sit- in a [[Speech Impediment|sitsuation]] where it was past quoted as "oily," and, uh, "stringy," so and I'm about to get ready to take a shower and uh.. and use some of the good Axe... shampoo/conditioner with anti-dandruff.

Yeah, so you'll see a difference in the layer after I uh... after I washed it and after it dries up.

==HairDifferenceAfter==

{{Infobox/video
| name = HairDifferenceAfter
| video = {{#ev:youtube|5bLkmTN60DI}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other| Hygiene}}, {{Rumors|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| shirt = {{CreepyRobe|text}}
| saga =
| previous = [[#HairDifferenceBefore|HairDifferenceBefore]]
| next = [[Ghostbusters (video)|Ghostbusters]]
}}

===Transcript===

Well it's been a while after my shuts— it's been a while after my shower. My hair— some time to dry. Now look at it now. Not oily and much more fuller. Not so stringy either.

And I used…

''[Chris pulls out a bottle of shampoo.]''

…[[Armoraxe|Axe Armor]]! Anti-dandruff shampoo and conditioner!

''[Chris puts down the bottle.]''

Use it to put a shine on your hairy head! Make all the jokes you want. I won't care.

''[Chris puts on his [[glasses]] with the blue modeling clay on it.]''

And I've lost my nose piece recently. Had to fabricate a new one out of model magic.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[JuggaloShoutOut]]|nextlink=[[Ghostbusters (video)|Ghostbusters]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Ghostbusters (video)

2010-10-31T04:21:37Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Ghostbusters''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris plays the [[Ghostbusters]] theme on ''Rock Band 2'', tries to sing, but not before doing some howling.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Ghostbusters
| video = {{#ev:youtube|J6jiSw3D4C8}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| saga =
| previous = [[HairDifference#HairDifferenceAfter|HairDifferenceAfter]]
| next = [[ToJackie]]
}}

===Transcript===

Here's a fun, spooky dedication. A fun, spooky dedication. Happy ''[howls]''-loween. -oween.

GHOSTBUSTERS

If there's [[Chris|something strange]] 
in your [[Ruckersville|neighborhood]] 
Who ya gonna call? 
GHOSTBUSTERS 

If there's something weird 
and it don't look good 
Who ya gonna call? 
GHOSTBUSTERS 

I ain't afraid of no [[Patti|ghosts]] 
I ain't afraid of no ghosts 

If you're seeing things 
running through your head 
Who ya gonna call? 
GHOSTBUSTERS 

An invisible man 
sleeping in your bed 
Who ya gonna call? 
GHOSTBUSTERS 

I ain't afraid of no ghosts 

Hey! I got one for ya!

You seein things 
in your head 
Who ya gonna call? 
[[Random Access Humor|Mr. Fred!]] 
he [[DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS|wets the bed!]] 
Whatcha gonna do 
when Mr Fred 
wets the bed? 
EEEEWWWWW! 
He wet the dang bed! 

Oh and also. 
You gotta ghost? 
You you really call? 
You call another ghost 
You call another ghost 
to get rid of the first ghost! 
I mean, if it's a boy ghost 
you call a girl ghost 
or vise versa 

Who ya gonna call? 
GHOSTBUSTERS 

If you've had a dose of a 
freaky ghost 
Ya better call 
ANOTHER GHOST 
or Mr. Fred 
They're better than Ghostbusters! 
of the Jake, Eddie, Tracy Clan 
They're the real Ghostbusters 

[[Mass debating|Bustin']] makes me feel good! 

GHOSTBUSTERS 

GHOSTBUSTERS 

GHOSTBUSTERS 

GHOSTBUSTERS 

GHOSTBUSTERS 

ANOTHER GHOST 

ANOTHER GHOST 

ANOTHER GHOST 

ANOTHER GHOST 

If not them 
The GHOSTBUSTERS 

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[#HairDifferenceAfter|HairDifferenceAfter]]|nextlink=[[ToJackie]]}}

{{Music Videos}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Book10Replacement

2010-10-31T04:17:16Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''Book10Replacement''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris shows off the "[[Chris and censorship|corrected]]" version of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], something he claimed to have started on months prior.

Instead of being executed, the Asperpedia Four are sentenced to live among the Amish for the rest of their lives, without access to the Internet and thus without the ability to troll. [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] dies after crashing into a mountain, and [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]] is imprisoned for marijuana possession.

These new pages are horrendously unfinished even by Chris's standards. None of them are colored and the majority of the action is textwalling. The dialog is appallingly dull even by ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' standards. One wonders why he bothered.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Book10Replacement
| video = {{#ev:youtube|E15yCuxm_Fs}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| previous = [[WelcometoBollywood]]
| next = [[DrainedCreativity]]
}}

===Transcript===

'''Chris:''' Wait--it is done! Now I can reveal to you the true pages of which... replace... the ones that were gory... and outrageous! Starting with Page 90 where we ended the trial! 
'''Sean:''' In our defense... we have a rock... 
'''Judge:''' I think we've heard enough...jury? 
'''Jury:''' We, the jury, find the defendants guilty times four! 
'''Judge:''' I agree! I hereby sentence the four of them to residence in an [[Wikipedia:Amish|Amish]] community! No technology access whatsoever, for the rest of their lives! Court is adjourned! 
[''Next page''] 
'''Narrator:''' Meanwhile, in the D.C. Maximum Security Prison... 
'''[[Slaweel Yram]]:''' Eeheehee! My spell is completed! I will wreak havoc on [[CWCville|that city]] once again! I am Slaweel! 
[''Next page: Slaweel has been knocked into the wall by an explosion of some sort.''] 
'''Slaweel:''' Dang it! 
'''Guard:''' Hahahaha! Another failed spell, 06960? 
'''Slaweel:''' Shut up! 
'''Guard:''' Anyway, you have a new cellmate. 
[Slaweel's new cellmate is revealed to be [[Kathleen Nicole Wallace]], [[Jason Kendrick Howell]]'s woman love slave.''] 
'''Slaweel:''' So, what did they get you for, lady? 
[''Next page''] 
'''Kathleen:''' Hm, well, [''?''], Slaweel. Anyway after the [[4-cent_garbage.com|4-cent_Garbage]] building collapse, Jason and I made our escape. After we got away we had a fight and he dumped me. He had caught me cheating with the secretary! I was distraught. I went and got-- and used some [[Tobacky|marijuana]]... a lot of it! The [[police]] caught me using it, I was tried, and now here I am! I heard Jason crashed into a mountain and died. That son of a *BEEP* got what he deserved. Trolling and torturing innocent people is devil's work anyway! Hmm. 
'''Slaweel:''' Did you smuggle any MJ in?! 
'''Kathleen:''' No, they frisked me and got all I had from my [[Plush breasts|breasts]] and up my asshole. [?] 
'''Slaweel:''' Oh. 
[''Next page: we see an extremely crude depiction of a horse-drawn carriage.''] 
'''Narrator:''' One month later, in the Amish community... 
[''Chris makes clopping noises.''] 
[''Next page: [[Mao]] and [[Alec Benson Leary]] are dressed in Amish clothing''] 
'''Alec:''' Good day, neighbor Mao! 
'''Mao:''' Good day, neighbor Alec! 
'''Alec:''' How are you today? 
'''Mao:''' I had a pleasant night's sleep, and my mandatory chosen wife--my mandatorily chosen wife, she had fixed a good bacon and eggs with biscuits for breakfast! It is good. 
'''Alec:''' Yes it is. 
[''Chris hums a tune as we see Sean step on a rake lying on the ground and get whacked in the face. This joke is almost certainly "borrowed" from [[The Simpsons]] episode "[[Wikipedia:Cape Feare|Cape Feare]]."''] 
[''Next page: The Amish trolls continue to talk.''] 
'''Alec:''' Well! Neighbor Sean has hit himself with the rake again. 
'''Mao:''' Yes. 
'''Alec:''' He has been doing good being the village idiot his whole life. 
'''Mao:''' I agree. 
'''Alec:''' I am looking forward merrily to today's barn raising. Ms. Baisley is making her famous beans and bread. 
'''Mao:''' Ms. Baisley is making her beans and bread again? I enjoy her beans and bread greatly. I enjoy her good food with her delicious milk freshly squeezed from her teats. 
'''Alec:''' Yes, her bovine breasts give the best milk around, neighbor Mao. 
'''[[Evan Christopher George]]:''' Neighbor Mao? neighbor Alec, you are mistaken! I am neighbor Evan. 
'''Alec:''' Oh dear! I am in error. Where is neighbor Mao? 
'''Evan:''' He has gone to the store for vittles. 
[''Next page: Mao is in the general store.''] 
'''Mao:''' Good day, shopkeep! I would like two pounds of black-eyed beans, ten carrots and fifty pounds of grain. And have you seen my pussy? She has run off attached to the teats of my lovely wife. 
[''Next page: Same as the ending of the original [[Sonichu 10|Sonichu #10]].''] 
'''Chris:''' And then the end of the story. Those are the replacement pages for book number ten. Thank you very much and have a good day.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[WelcometoBollywood]]|nextlink=[[DrainedCreativity]]}}

{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

SpaghettiRoutine

2010-10-31T04:09:24Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''SpaghettiRoutine''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris mimes the preparation of spaghetti. He had planned to actually cook some spaghetti in his [[Chris's kitchen|kitchen]], but [[Barb|his mother]] had cluttered up the stove. Chris then presents the finished dish served on a paper plate and rubs his face in it. As he wipes the sauce from his face, he makes a reference to an orange-faced [[Clyde Cash|Cashy type person]] he knows.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = SpaghettiRoutine
| video = {{#ev:youtube|IZe8iAvUDMs}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Home Cooking}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Comedy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[ShowerClean2]]
| next = [[WelcometoBollywood]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[Image:Chefboyardee.jpg|thumb|right|The secret recipie of Chris's spaghetti.]]

For this presentation, I was going to make some spaghetti, live in the kitchen. But unfortunately, I don't have access to stove 'cause mom put a whole bunch of crap in the way. So, I am going to mime it. [''Mimes picking up a pot.']' Here's the pot. [''Wipes down the imaginary stove and mimes putting the pot on the burner.''] Put it on the stove. [''Mimes turning on the stove.']' Set it to the boiling temperature. ''Gestures upwards, making a sound that imitates steam rushing up, before tapping imaginary keys/buttons to his right.'' Boop-boop-boop-boop! Ah, in time the water's boiling. So we take the pot of spaghetti noodles...[''Mimics something unidentifiable.''] And...[''Hissing noises, wild gestures.''] Click click click! [''Stirring motions. Adopts a baby voice.''] Noodles, smell so good! [''Lifts pretend noodles as if on a spoon.''] Mm, hey look at that. Drippy, no sniffy! [?] [''Holds them close to the camera.''] I offer you some don—some non drippy! [?] But it's hot right now, so you might wanna wait a while. [''More hissing, more stirring.''] Yeah, I say our noodles are done. [''More imaginary knob turning. Chris motions as if holding a fishing rod.''] Hey, we pour—we drain the water out. [''Does so, and sets “pot” down.''] Get some plates. [''Mimes getting plates down.''] Oh wait...we're serving two! [''In light of this epiphany, Chris tosses the excess plates away and makes shattering sounds.''] Haha! I'm just kiddin'. [''More gesturing, seems to be serving spaghetti.''] Fork. [''Mimes scraping pot.''] We don't want any noodles left behind! We'll rinse that out later!

In the meantime, here's a good jar of marinara sauce. [''Produces imaginary sauce. Unscrews it with unnecessary groaning noises, then a pop sound to indicate the jar coming off.''] There we go, I popped the seal! [''Pours it.''] Bloop-bloop-bloop-bloop...and now some grated mozzarella! [''Sings while caressing the mozzarella.''] I gotta pop this seal. Bloop-bloop...[''Shakes it over the food.''] And we'll add other spices...from my father's collection, which includes rosemary, garlic, parsley, whatever. [''More “unsealing”, more “shaking.”'']

And you can make your own meatballs with processed meat and put it all on a tray or something, letting it grow [?!], and then rolling it all into balls. But they isn't not so good, not as good, are they? So, one way around that [?], you can buy your own meatballs. We had this pa-had this package of swedish meatballs, cook it in the microwave so they're warming up already. [''Opens a package of imaginary meatballs, does something unidentifiable to them, and appears to dump them all over the “table.”''] And in the end, I'll wa-I'll at least...we'll have a few plates, you get summat...like this! [''Turns the camera to focus on a plate of real spaghetti and meatballs on a paper plate. Zooms in an out on it.''] Yummy, yummy, delicious!

[''Focuses back on himself. Goes back to the baby voice.''] So now we can sit down and eat our spaghetti. It is so delicious. [''Stirs the plate of real spaghetti with a plastic fork.''] It smells so good![''Holds a forkful up to the camera.''] You want a bite? Look at this you want a bite? Mm, that good, myum. You better take a bite, because you know what? Watch this. [''Chris mashes his face into the spaghetti like a child and takes several disgusting bites, then emerges with sauce on his nose and chin. Holds out his arms and smiles like he did something worth praising.''] Ta-da! [''Laughs. Wipes his face with a paper towel.''] I'm just kiddin'. I wouldn't do that to you in real life. It's fun. Hey, at least my head's not fuckin' orange. Like a certain...[''Wipes nose some more'']...Cashey type person I know. [''Turns camera off.'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ShowerClean2]]|nextlink=[[WelcometoBollywood]]}}

{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

SpaghettiRoutine

2010-10-31T04:09:06Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''SpaghettiRoutine''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris mimes the preparation of spaghetti. He had planned to actually cook some spaghetti in his [[Chris's kitchen|kitchen]], but [[Barb|his mother]] had cluttered up the stove. Chris then presents the finished dish served on a paper plate and rubs his face in it. As he wipes the sauce from his face, he makes a reference to an orange-faced [[Clyde Cash|Cashy type person]] he knows.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = SpaghettiRoutine
| video = {{#ev:youtube|IZe8iAvUDMs}}
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Home Cooking}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Comedy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[ShowerClean2]]
| next = [[WelcometoBollywood]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[Image:Chefboyardee.jpg|thumb|right|The secret recipie of Chris's spaghetti.]]

For this presentation, I was going to make some spaghetti, live in the kitchen. But unfortunately, I don't have access to stove 'cause mom put a whole bunch of crap in the way. So, I am going to mime it. [''Mimes picking up a pot.']' Here's the pot. [''Wipes down the imaginary stove and mimes putting the pot on the burner.''] Put it on the stove. [''Mimes turning on the stove.']' Set it to the boiling temperature. ''Gestures upwards, making a sound that imitates steam rushing up, before tapping imaginary keys/buttons to his right.'' Boop-boop-boop-boop! Ah, in time the water's boiling. So we take the pot of spaghetti noodles...[''Mimics something unidentifiable.''] And...[''Hissing noises, wild gestures.''] Click click click! [''Stirring motions. Adopts a baby voice.''] Noodles, smell so good! [''Lifts pretend noodles as if on a spoon.''] Mm, hey look at that. Drippy, no [[Duck|sniffy]]! [?] [''Holds them close to the camera.''] I offer you some don—some non drippy! [?] But it's hot right now, so you might wanna wait a while. [''More hissing, more stirring.''] Yeah, I say our noodles are done. [''More imaginary knob turning. Chris motions as if holding a fishing rod.''] Hey, we pour—we drain the water out. [''Does so, and sets “pot” down.''] Get some plates. [''Mimes getting plates down.''] Oh wait...we're serving two! [''In light of this epiphany, Chris tosses the excess plates away and makes shattering sounds.''] Haha! I'm just kiddin'. [''More gesturing, seems to be serving spaghetti.''] Fork. [''Mimes scraping pot.''] We don't want any noodles left behind! We'll rinse that out later!

In the meantime, here's a good jar of marinara sauce. [''Produces imaginary sauce. Unscrews it with unnecessary groaning noises, then a pop sound to indicate the jar coming off.''] There we go, I popped the seal! [''Pours it.''] Bloop-bloop-bloop-bloop...and now some grated mozzarella! [''Sings while caressing the mozzarella.''] I gotta pop this seal. Bloop-bloop...[''Shakes it over the food.''] And we'll add other spices...from my father's collection, which includes rosemary, garlic, parsley, whatever. [''More “unsealing”, more “shaking.”'']

And you can make your own meatballs with processed meat and put it all on a tray or something, letting it grow [?!], and then rolling it all into balls. But they isn't not so good, not as good, are they? So, one way around that [?], you can buy your own meatballs. We had this pa-had this package of swedish meatballs, cook it in the microwave so they're warming up already. [''Opens a package of imaginary meatballs, does something unidentifiable to them, and appears to dump them all over the “table.”''] And in the end, I'll wa-I'll at least...we'll have a few plates, you get summat...like this! [''Turns the camera to focus on a plate of real spaghetti and meatballs on a paper plate. Zooms in an out on it.''] Yummy, yummy, delicious!

[''Focuses back on himself. Goes back to the baby voice.''] So now we can sit down and eat our spaghetti. It is so delicious. [''Stirs the plate of real spaghetti with a plastic fork.''] It smells so good![''Holds a forkful up to the camera.''] You want a bite? Look at this you want a bite? Mm, that good, myum. You better take a bite, because you know what? Watch this. [''Chris mashes his face into the spaghetti like a child and takes several disgusting bites, then emerges with sauce on his nose and chin. Holds out his arms and smiles like he did something worth praising.''] Ta-da! [''Laughs. Wipes his face with a paper towel.''] I'm just kiddin'. I wouldn't do that to you in real life. It's fun. Hey, at least my head's not fuckin' orange. Like a certain...[''Wipes nose some more'']...Cashey type person I know. [''Turns camera off.'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ShowerClean2]]|nextlink=[[WelcometoBollywood]]}}

{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

PlayingHouse

2010-10-30T05:27:51Z

Travis Cwckle:

'''PlayingHouse''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 25 [[October 2010]]. In this video, Chris plays with some [[LEGO]] people like a [[pedofork]]. Most notably, he points out the [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|''peeps and poops'']] of his fictional children. Chris most likely got this phrase from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "Whistle While Your Wife Works", where Herbert tells his dog to make these.

Also, this video suggests that, if they were to be married, Chris would want Jackie to work as a journalist during the day while he [[Monthly tugboat|lies around at home]], "taking care of the children".

It is interesting to note that while "[[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]]" is portrayed as a sweet little girl, her little brother "[[Reginald Chandler|Reginald]]" is only referred to when Chris laments him expelling various bodily fluids and crying all night.

Also of note is Chris's first use of what appears to be a makeshift stage with lighting — though as with everything else Chris does with [[Chris and cinematography|camerawork and lighting]], it is badly done — the viewer can see one of the corners of the box because of the shadow, the light is still too low, and the camera isn't centered on the scene.
==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = PlayingHouse
| video = {{#ev:youtube|7wHqScoso3s}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|text}} {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[SonichuBabies]]
| next = [[Wigwam]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

Okay, here's another story - you know its[?] love and glory. Alright, this is me. This is my sweetheart. These are our children, that's, uh, Reginald, this one's Crystal. Reginald's da baby. Younger brother. This'll-this'll double as, table, and uh, beds. At their respective times. So... on with the show.

AnIhome. And my wife's coming home from work. ''[High pitched voice]'' ''Hi honey halhome!'' [''Normally''] Oh hi sweetheart, how ya doin'. How was your day at work. ''Oh it's been good, I'm just happy to see you home safe.'' [''Kissing sound''] Kiiiiiss. Anyways, journalism is very hard. Yes it is, I hear. So, what happened today? ''Aw, we [unintelligable] my article got printed, it got some very huge responses'' [''Wiggles "Jackie", tips her over''] Really. ''Yeah! But unfortunately uhh dey laid off Wilkinson at work.'' Lllayday off Wilkinson! What they do that for? '''Pparently he wasn't keepin' up!'' Oh. That's a shame.

[''"Children" slide in front of the screen''] Wheeewheewheewheewhee! [''Lego figures appear unfazed'']

''So, how're the kids?'' D-dey're doin' okay. You know, there's a... pla... they're just playing. Uh. Actually, uh. Cry-actually Crystal is uh, doin' her preschool homework and uh, Reg-Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' [[Chris|baabychild]]! Made his lil' [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|peeps n' poops]]! And he we-and he went... weewee all over the bathroom, it was [[14 Branchland Court|terrible mess]]. [[Chris' room|Terrible mess]]. I cl-had to clean all that up and of course I changed all of his [[Butt garments|diapers]] too. When they needed changin'. I fed the boy. I fed the girl, too. [''Awkward silence. Chris knocks over "Jackie"''] Anyway, they're doin' okay. ''So how's uhhwubde-dendibeready?'' Yes, dinner will be ready in a f-about fifteen minutes so you can go uh, put your f-put your things away and I-come to dinner. ''Alright.'' ''["Jackie" flies off, followed by "Chris"]''

''[Table and chairs are set out''] [[Burger King|Dinnertime]]! Numnumnumnum! [''Lego figures join table'']

[''Offscreen''] Oh sh-which ones did I say? Blue one's Reginald, orange one's Crystal. And Reginald needs a booster seat.

Mmm, anyway, we just finished off dinner. ''Mmm, that was delicious dear''. Why thank you. It was a-was a specialty that I have learned from the uh-home and-the uh, food channel. New recipe. [[Giant Penis Comic|Chicken calzone. An', mashed potatoes, n' green beans.]] ''Myeah, it was very good''. ''[As "Reginald]'' ''Bububububoobee! Th!'' Aah, too bad lil' Reginald end up uh, throwing up in some places... ''[As "Crystal"]'' ''Daddy, can I go my woom now, I think I'm gonna do my... uh, write my diary, and y'know guh get ready for bed soon.'' Okay sweetheart, y-go k-Crystal, go take care of yourself. ''Thank you daddy! Dababubudee!''

''[As Jackie]'' ''I'll now take Reginald off your hands, and you can take care of the uh-dinner table and all that, okay.''

Alright so, I take care of the dishes... Duhduhduhduhduhduhdadada... And then a lil' while later, go upstairs t'... tuck children into bed... ''Daddy, that was a very lovel- very nice story you read to me.'' I'm glad you enjoyed it, Crystal. ''Daddy, would you th-do you know what I might be when I grow up?'' No. What do you think you might be when you grow up? ''I thiink, I want to be a [[Women's Rights|ballerina dancer]]. Either that, or a [[Officer Nasty|police wo- police woman]]. I'm still undecided.'' That's alright, you ma-you take your time, make up your mind, it'll come to you, dear. Night! [''Fumbles with toy''] Oops. [''"Kisses"''] Goodnight sweetheart. Goodnight little girl. ''Goodnight!''

Now we tuck Re- And now we tuck Reginald in. ''Dabadabadabadubu!'' [''"Kiss"''] Mmm, well you sleep tight little partner. Don't be makin' no cries tonight. ''Dubehbedubuh.'' Mmm. Wow, [[chris and death|he's sound asleep already]], hope he stays that way for the rest of the night.

[''Begins to press "Jackie" and "Chris" into the "bed"''] Mmm, legos don't want to fit together.

''["Jackie" and "Chris" are on the bed. The bed is only 4 units wide, so both characters are teetering on the edge.]'' And now, me n' my wife in bed. Mmm... So what's up ho- what's up for tomorrow? ''Well I got another case to report... I got me doi- they got me doin' a trial with uh- some- with some- against some dude who uh, murdered somebody. S'posed to be really big, so... Take it up on that.'' Alrigh... Mmm... I got m- got my- tomorrow's shopping day. Have to deal with the uh... Sh- Have to deal with the, little Reginald, crying on the back seat with me, so... Crystal will keep him calm. ''That's good...'' ''[Chris begins to [[rape|do the inevitable]], but luckily notices in time that society seems to require that pesky "asking" part]'' So, you wanna do it? ''Yeah, why not.'' ''[Chris pushes the lego figures together]'' ''Oh yeah, you do it good.'' [''Chris begins to bang the figures together painfully, in a sex scene that lasts for approximately 5 seconds''] ''Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah awhwww, good, goin' great, you did good. Yay.'' Ahh, goodnight. Sleeep tight. ''[Chris, avoiding the previous tragedy of getting the figures on the bed, just drops the minifigures on the floor.]''

The e-

==See also==

*[[A Sonichu Day]]

{{videos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[SonichuBabies]]|nextlink=[[Wigwam]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

SonichuBabies

2010-10-28T07:18:54Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

[[File:11cfxgi.jpg.png|thumb|What the sonichu babies could have looked like [[Chris and art|if Chris could draw]]]]

'''SonichuBabies''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 25 [[October 2010]]. In it, Chris rips off the [[1980s]] cartoon ''Muppet Babies'' by recasting the [[Chaotic Combo]] as [[Sonee and Rosey|babies]]. Much like [[Things Chris has ripped off|everything else he steals]], Chris's version of the series lacks any of the charm and wit the original cartoon had, transforming it into "Chaotic Combo as babies, doing stuff babies aren't ''supposed'' to be doing!"

Chris shows us his lack of understanding about what constitutes proper childcare by leaving the little creatures unattended. Showing that they aren't mature enough to be left alone for extended periods, the children [[Chris and sex|kiss]], watch TV shows meant for older audiences, ostracize Blake, and [[CWC Fighter|fight]] - Punchy even goes so far as to knock Wild out of a window, which could give Wild serious injuries.

This marks the first time Chris has actually done ''anything'' with his beloved Sonichu Characters since the [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Christmas Special.]] Much to the [[Trolls|fans']] chagrin, Chris has decided to take all of his characters and turn them all into [[Sonee & Rosey|the most annoying part]] of the CWCVerse.

It should be noted that this is the first time a Sonee of Blake has appeared, casting him as [[wikipedia:Gonzo the Great|Gonzo]], despite the fact that there's nothing to compare the two together, much less the rest of the characters. Also note that Chris [[autism|has to describe Blake's personality in detail]].

Also worth mentioning is that ''Sonichu Babies'' was the name of one of the stories in [[Sonichu 3]], though it was an origin story for the Combo. Since the Chaotic Combo never met in the comics until they evolved, and since it is established in the comics that Sonichu, Rosechu and Blake were never sonees or rosees at any point (Sonichu and Rosechu were transformed by the Chaotic Rainbow and Blake was cloned) it's possible that this is not canon in the CWCVerse, or a complete retcon.

As a further testament to Chris's utter lack of imagination, the vignette featuring Young Rosechu and Young Sonichu features the same elements from his [[PlayingHouse|other short]] that was released the same day: The wife works as a journalist, while the husband stays at home and is supposed to take care of a crying and shitting baby but delegates the task to the older sibling.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = SonichuBabies
| video = {{#ev:youtube|J3IuXNk5_LU}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|text}} {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[A Workout]]
| next = [[PlayingHouse]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Wittle Cute Sonees Page 1 by johaely.jpg|thumb|Sonichu babies!]]

''[Displays four crude drawings of members of the [[Chaotic Combo]] as babies, stuck to the end of what appear to be pens or straws]'' Dooweeoooh, [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] babies, we make our dreams come truueee...

''[Wild Sonichu and Blake in shot]'' Sonichu babies, we'll do anything for youuu...

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Sonichu (character)|Sonee]] and [[Rosechu|Rosee]] in shot]'' When your world was kinda weird and you wished that you were theeere... ''[As Rosee]'' Just close your eyes and make-believe, and you can be anywhere!

''[Drawing of a pair of human legs in shot]'' Is everything alright in here? ''[As all [[sonichus]]]'' Yes Nanny!

''[Displays all drawings, dropping some]'' Sonichu Sonichu Sonichu Sonichu babies! Yaaay! Okay, let's beginning da show!

''[Sonee and Rosey]'' We're having fun today in d-in d-in da ''room'', aren't we! Y-Aren't we Rosey! Hehedat's right Sonee, we're having fun in here! Dat's [[Wild]], [[Bubbles]] ''[Blake appears instead of Bubbles]'', [[Punchy]] ''[Angelica appears instead of Punchy]'', [[Magi-chan]], [[Angelica]], even [[Blake]]! ''[Shows other drawings, speaks as Blake]'' Hello. What? I'm [[Christian Weston Chandler|the weird one]]. Compare me to Gonzo. I have [[niggos|black]] hair though. ''[Fumbles with sticks for a few seconds, removes all but Sonee and Rosey]'' Anyway, come with us, we'regoingtohavefun, whee! ''[Moves the two around without rhyme or reason]'' Whee, oh we're having fun, wheeeewheeee! Mm. Ey Ro- ey Rosey we're jus' a... d-d-fun. What'd you wanna do now? I wanna do that thing like we saw on da [[TV]] show. That what ya wanna do? Yeaah! Alright! ''[Makes the baby siblings "kiss"]'' Mmmmmmm! Mmmmm!

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Chris and writing|Exposition!Magi-chan]] moves into shot]'' What? Ever since they watched- they seen that kissing scene, on that episode of... The Young and the Restless... they been makin' out, all the time! They lot-ov-enjoying it. Lil' Sonee has been noted saying, "she tastes like applesauce"!

''[Disembodied legs return]'' Hey kids, I got' go out now. And mukku-my husband's comin' with me. ''[Comic Chris's trademark sneakers join]'' That's right. We're going out to go- we're going out shopping. We're gonna bring back some delicious groceries, and we'll be back in a lil' while. ''[Pause]'' Wait a minute. Who's gonna mind the babies? ''Oh yeah you're right. You stay home.'' Oh yeah you're right, I'll stay home, you go out to get the groceries. ''Look how we settled that!'' Well, we s- we're always able to settle things. Even und- even our minor disagreements. Look the way we still love each other. Mmm. ''[Pieces of paper "kiss"]'' Okay, see you later. ''[Female legs leave]''

Alright children, y'all s- y'all be carefull out here. I'm gonna keep the door op- I'm gonna keep the door open, you just uh, give me a shout if you uh, need anything. ''[Hastily grabs bunch of children in view]'' ''Okay Papa C!''

''[Bubbles and Wild, Rosey accidentally sneaks into frame]'' What's the matter, Wild? Iunno. Suddenly I just don't feel well. Well, and why is that? I- I was watchin' my- I was watchin' Blues Clues the other day, and, I missed a clue! You missed a clue? How'd you do that? You're- that guy was supposed to be able to detect da clues before that guy in the green shirt does! Yeah, what was that guy's name? Uhh... heck if I know! Mm. Well, anyway... I feel, a bit, I feel bad because I missed a clue! Dun worry about it, we all make mistakes. Yeah, you're right. We all do make mistakes. I guess I'll get over this someho- s-sometime. Yeah, you will. Hey, let's go play in the t- let's go play on the merry-go-round. Okay! ''[Both move out of frame]'' Whee whee whee whee whee we'll go play onna merry-go round!

''[Pause, fumbling noises offscreen. Punchy enters.]'' [[wikipedia:Samurai Pizza Cats|Samurai Pizza Cats]]! Miaow miaow miaow miaow miaow! Samurai Pizza Cats! Miaowmiaowmiow miaow miaow! Samurai armor! Oh! A [[CWCville|communist]], huh? You freakin' no good-- [interrupted by off-screen female voice] Would anyone happen to have a nail file on them? ...C'mon sweetie, we're all doin' a TV show! Hey wait a sec I thought [unintelligible] on time because I watchin' live television!

''[Replaced by Blake]'' Hyeah. Mm. I really like Bubbles. She's so pretty, she's so bub-b-ly, she's so fun. I'm just- b- I'm just the weirdo here. I'm the one that gets... left out. It's not because I'm- it's not because of my color, it's just because I have my own opinions beside from theirs. I do things for myself. Sultimes I like to r- sometimes I like to read, even though I don't know how to read yet! I'm different. I think for myself and things. I play too sometimes. Ba-suh-I bring danger along some-I bring danger with me sometimes, and... that makes me sad. You know. They can't apprec-me- appreciate me even though I'm young and danger... [gibberish] ''[Enter Sonee and Rosee]'' ''Wubuh listen de- listen to Blake over der? Keep on going on and on with his own self! [unintelligible] again...'' Yeah, well he's talkin' to himself, huh. Well I dunno. Seems kinda weird. ''[As Blake]'' Oh will you shut up! We all talk to ourselves at one time or another! ''Sorry Blake!'' Yeah, sorry dude! Aah, whatever. ''[Blake saunters off]'' Hmm.

''[Angelica]'' All the lovely things we r- I read in the Bible. Lalalalalalalaa. Lovely things, inna Bible. Good story. ''[Magi-chan]'' Mmm, what stories are you reading about there, Angelica? ''Oh, this one, I'm reading about [[Sega|Genesis]]. The story of Adam and Eve!'' Ah yes. And then the apple gets bitten. ''YOU SPOILED IT FOR ME!! [Pause] I suppose next you're gonna tell me who gets thrown out first.'' I won't, I'll just uh, give you respect, there. ''Thank you. [Pause] Oh no, Eve gets kicked out first? [Whine] Well, at least we women grew to power eventually.'' Yeah. ''[Awkward pause]'' ''Praaaise Jesus in all his lov- in all his... forgiveness for us, he died for our sins and everything.'' Yes, we are Christians. We go to church every Sunday. ''An' Nanny takes us!'' Yeah. And Chris comes with us too! [[Chris and religion|He's a good Christian, yes he is.]] ''So what you wanna do now?'' Let's go play with Legos! ''Okay! Wheeee! We're off to play with Legos!''

''[Long pause. Punchy and Bubbles come into view, before being hastily retracted. Chris mumbles to himself before replacing Bubbles with Wild Sonichu]'' Hey Wild, you wanna spar a li'l? Okay Punchy! ''[Punchy launches himself at Wild, falls over]'' Huh. Got me there. ''[Wild "hits" Punchy]'' Got me again. Well, I'm gonna get you now. PEWWWW! ''[Punchy flies into Wild, both go offscreen. Punchy returns alone]'' Oh, shoot. I [[Mypoe|knocked him out da window!]] Yo c'mon[?], come in back in da window! ''I'm really hurt! You had me lyin' in a bush!'' I'm sorry. ''[Awkward silence]'' Aah, it's okay. Just be careful to watch yer punches. Cuz I gotta pull my punches if I wanna work[?] inside the nursery. ''Yeah.'' So, I'll do that. ''[Punchy comes forward]'' Because, [[Death threats|violence is not always the answer]] to e- is not always the answer. So- ye- uh, self defense, it ''can'' be... the answer. ''[Wild moves in front of Punchy]'' ''I agree. I don't like being bullied. Me, I was- b- m- I was out there riding my... bicycle the other day, an' [[Clyde Cash|bully]] comes up to me, and he, he g-steals the bicycle and he [[Kick the Autistic|beats me up]]! What's wrong with that dude?'' D'ya want me to go beat him up? ''Nah, I just need to learn self defense.'' I'm gonna go find and [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|beat him up]]. Hiyaaa! ''[Both launch out of frame, but Wild returns] Ya don't even know what he looks like, where ya goin' Punchy? ...Anyway. [Turns around once, leaves]''

''[Punchy re-enters]'' Th-you can't beat me Punchy[?], I'm [[Random-access humor|comical]], knock knock, who's there, orange, orange who, orange you glad I didn't say banana? ''[Pause]'' What? ''[Pause]'' Oh well. Knock knock. Who's there. Uhh, hello? What d'you mean, "hello". Well you said "who's there". Dyeah knock knock joke? I say "knock knock", you say "who's there". What? I stayed up watching [[Officer Keino|Home Movies]] one night. Place- It's a funny cartoon show with Brendon Small[?]. [[Sonichu 8|Not recommended for children]], though. It- still maybe teenagers. Or youth- or you- think it's a PG rating. TV-PG. ''[Jiggles around]'' I don't care I watched it by myself! I was up, I was wirey! I couldn't go to sleep! ''[Is still for a second, before leaving somewhat abruptly.]''

''[Sonee and Rosee return]'' ''Okay so... What should we do now?'' I think let's go play House! ''Yeah let's go play House again!'' Yay! Doodoodoodooboodoodoo, hi honey I'm home. ''Oh, where've you been? Mmm, I mean, how was your day sweetheart?'' It's been good, y'know, I've just been, uh, doing business and everything. M-keepin' everything- keepin' the city safe with my swift speed and lightning attacks! ''Very good. I've been minding the children. Although when I went out, I wa- I was intercepted by one of the villains! But I- gre- myself at self defence, [[The Incredible Lioness|I struck them right back!]] And I stood my ground.'' ''[Pause]'' That's very good. How're the children. ''I think I just told you that. [She didn't.]'' Oh yes you did! The children are good! Hey- okay- so- that was good, let's do role reversal. ''Okay!''

''[Switch places]'' ''Hi honey, I'm home!'' Oh hi honey, how was w- how was- how was your work at [[Jackie|journalism]]? ''Oh, very good, I wrote- guh story here, and there. [Pause] The bank was robbed.'' There was a v- there was a bank robbery? ''Yeah, didn't you hear that? There was a horse and mane[????]!'' Horse and mane? ''Sure, the horse was on the main!'' ''[Pause]'' What? Iunno. Go figure. Comedy. Anyway, [unintelligible], and I made, bulublugh, and I made, promotion!'' Very good. The children have been doi- have been doin' good today. I mean theyuh, the [[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-]] I mean uh, the younger one [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|pooped all over the place]]. Ugh, that was a whole bunch to clean up. And, uh... and the older one missed the toilet! I didn't know what to do with that, 'cept to clean it up, and tell her that it was wrong to do it in that direction, not to [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|aim it this way]], that. So I've been cleanin' and cookin' and keeping house all day long. ''And I've been out journalism all day.'' Yeah. ''[Pause]'' Anyway uh, today was grocery shopping day so I went out for groceries. S- an' children ha- and children... went with me. I took them along with me. And, they were okay in the car for a little while but then there was a scr- then on the way home there was a screaming. Yeah, the younger one was tired. Just waawaawaawaawaa. Waaa. ''[Pause]'' So the older one kept- kept the, uh- kept the younger one quiet, you know. At least she knew better. So, she calmed him down. ''That's good.'' I had to change a few [[Butt garments|diapers]] to- I had to change a whole number of diapers for that little one. What a mess. But I'm willing to go through with it, because I am the father! The house husband. ''And I'm the one that goes out, make the money.'' Okay. So. Wanna end the show. ''Why not?'' The puppet show. Alright. Yeah. Sonichu babies! Yaaay! Dudududududuh!

''[Feet come back into view]'' Dududududududuh! Duh duh! ''Thank you very much, goodnight!'' Goodnight.

==See also==

*[[A Sonichu Day]]
*[[Sonichu 3]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[A Workout]]|nextlink=[[PlayingHouse]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

SonichuBabies

2010-10-28T07:18:10Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

[[File:11cfxgi.jpg.png|thumb|What the sonichu babies could have looked like [[Chris and art|if Chris could draw]]]]

'''SonichuBabies''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 25 [[October 2010]]. In it, Chris rips off the [[1980s]] cartoon ''Muppet Babies'' by recasting the [[Chaotic Combo]] as [[Sonee and Rosey|babies]]. Much like [[Things Chris has ripped off|everything else he steals]], Chris's version of the series lacks any of the charm and wit the original cartoon had, transforming it into "Chaotic Combo as babies, doing stuff babies aren't ''supposed'' to be doing!"

Chris shows us his lack of understanding about what constitutes proper childcare by leaving the little creatures unattended. Showing that they aren't mature enough to be left alone for extended periods, the children [[Chris and sex|kiss]], watch TV shows meant for older audiences, ostracize Blake, and [[CWC Fighter|fight]] - Punchy even goes so far as to knock Wild out of a window, which could give Wild serious injuries.

This marks the first time Chris has actually done ''anything'' with his beloved Sonichu Characters since the [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Christmas Special.]] Much to the [[Trolls|fans']] chagrin, Chris has decided to take all of his characters and turn them all into [[Sonee & Rosey|the most annoying part]] of the CWCVerse.

It should be noted that this is the first time a Sonee of Blake has appeared, casting him as [[wikipedia:Gonzo the Great|Gonzo]], despite the fact that there's nothing to compare the two together, much less the rest of the characters. Also note that Chris [[autism|has to describe Blake's personality in detail]].

Also worth mentioning is that ''Sonichu Babies'' was the name of one of the stories in [[Sonichu 3]], though it was an origin story for the Combo. Since the Chaotic Combo never met in the comics until they evolved, and since it is established in the comics that Sonichu, Rosechu and Blake were never sonees or rosees at any point (Sonichu and Rosechu were transformed by the Chaotic Rainbow and Blake was cloned) it's possible that this is not canon in the CWCVerse, or a complete retcon.

As a further testament to Chris's utter lack of imagination, the vignette featuring Young Rosechu and Young Sonichu features the same elements from his [[PlayingHouse|other short]] that was released the same day: The wife works as a journalist, while the husband stays at home and is supposed to take care of a crying and shitting baby but delegates the task to the older sibling.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = SonichuBabies
| video = {{#ev:youtube|J3IuXNk5_LU}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|text}} {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[A Workout]]
| next = [[PlayingHouse]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Wittle Cute Sonees Page 1 by johaely.jpg|thumb|Sonichu babies!]]

''[Displays four crude drawings of members of the [[Chaotic Combo]] as babies, stuck to the end of what appear to be pens or straws]'' Dooweeoooh, [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] babies, we make our dreams come truueee...

''[Wild Sonichu and Blake in shot]'' Sonichu babies, we'll do anything for youuu...

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Sonichu (character)|Sonee]] and [[Rosechu|Rosee]] in shot]'' When your world was kinda weird and you wished that you were theeere... ''[As Rosee]'' Just close your eyes and make-believe, and you can be anywhere!

''[Drawing of a pair of human legs in shot]'' Is everything alright in here? ''[As all [[sonichus]]]'' Yes Nanny!

''[Displays all drawings, dropping some]'' Sonichu Sonichu Sonichu Sonichu babies! Yaaay! Okay, let's beginning da show!

''[Sonee and Rosey]'' We're having fun today in d-in d-in da ''room'', aren't we! Y-Aren't we Rosey! Hehedat's right Sonee, we're having fun in here! Dat's [[Wild]], [[Bubbles]] ''[Blake appears instead of Bubbles]'', [[Punchy]] ''[Angelica appears instead of Punchy]'', [[Magi-chan]], [[Angelica]], even [[Blake]]! ''[Shows other drawings, speaks as Blake]'' Hello. What? I'm [[Christian Weston Chandler|the weird one]]. Compare me to Gonzo. I have [[niggos|black]] hair though. ''[Fumbles with sticks for a few seconds, removes all but Sonee and Rosey]'' Anyway, come with us, we'regoingtohavefun, whee! ''[Moves the two around without rhyme or reason]'' Whee, oh we're having fun, wheeeewheeee! Mm. Ey Ro- ey Rosey we're jus' a... d-d-fun. What'd you wanna do now? I wanna do that thing like we saw on da [[TV]] show. That what ya wanna do? Yeaah! Alright! ''[Makes the baby siblings "kiss"]'' Mmmmmmm! Mmmmm!

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Chris and writing|Exposition!Magi-chan]] moves into shot]'' What? Ever since they watched- they seen that kissing scene, on that episode of... The Young and the Restless... they been makin' out, all the time! They lot-ov-enjoying it. Lil' Sonee has been noted saying, "she tastes like applesauce"!

''[Disembodied legs return]'' Hey kids, I got' go out now. And mukku-my husband's comin' with me. ''[Comic Chris's trademark sneakers join]'' That's right. We're going out to go- we're going out shopping. We're gonna bring back some delicious groceries, and we'll be back in a lil' while. ''[Pause]'' Wait a minute. Who's gonna mind the babies? ''Oh yeah you're right. You stay home.'' Oh yeah you're right, I'll stay home, you go out to get the groceries. ''Look how we settled that!'' Well, we s- we're always able to settle things. Even und- even our minor disagreements. Look the way we still love each other. Mmm. ''[Pieces of paper "kiss"]'' Okay, see you later. ''[Female legs leave]''

Alright children, y'all s- y'all be carefull out here. I'm gonna keep the door op- I'm gonna keep the door open, you just uh, give me a shout if you uh, need anything. ''[Hastily grabs bunch of children in view]'' ''Okay Papa C!''

''[Bubbles and Wild, Rosey accidentally sneaks into frame]'' What's the matter, Wild? Iunno. Suddenly I just don't feel well. Well, and why is that? I- I was watchin' my- I was watchin' Blues Clues the other day, and, I missed a clue! You missed a clue? How'd you do that? You're- that guy was supposed to be able to detect da clues before that guy in the green shirt does! Yeah, what was that guy's name? Uhh... heck if I know! Mm. Well, anyway... I feel, a bit, I feel bad because I missed a clue! Dun worry about it, we all make mistakes. Yeah, you're right. We all do make mistakes. I guess I'll get over this someho- s-sometime. Yeah, you will. Hey, let's go play in the t- let's go play on the merry-go-round. Okay! ''[Both move out of frame]'' Whee whee whee whee whee we'll go play onna merry-go round!

''[Pause, fumbling noises offscreen. Punchy enters.]'' [[wikipedia:Samurai Pizza Cats|Samurai Pizza Cats]]! Miaow miaow miaow miaow miaow! Samurai Pizza Cats! Miaowmiaowmiow miaow miaow! Samurai armor! Oh! A [[CWCville|communist]], huh? You freakin' no good-- [interrupted by off-screen female voice] Would anyone happen to have a nail file on them? ...C'mon sweetie, we're all doin' a TV show! Hey wait a sec I thought [unintelligible] on time because I watchin' live television!

''[Replaced by Blake]'' Hyeah. Mm. I really like Bubbles. She's so pretty, she's so bub-b-ly, she's so fun. I'm just- b- I'm just the weirdo here. I'm the one that gets... left out. It's not because I'm- it's not because of my color, it's just because I have my own opinions beside from theirs. I do things for myself. Sultimes I like to r- sometimes I like to read, even though I don't know how to read yet! I'm different. I think for myself and things. I play too sometimes. Ba-suh-I bring danger along some-I bring danger with me sometimes, and... that makes me sad. You know. They can't apprec-me- appreciate me even though I'm young and danger... [gibberish] ''[Enter Sonee and Rosee]'' ''Wubuh listen de- listen to Blake over der? Keep on going on and on with his own self! [unintelligible] again...'' Yeah, well he's talkin' to himself, huh. Well I dunno. Seems kinda weird. ''[As Blake]'' Oh will you shut up! We all talk to ourselves at one time or another! ''Sorry Blake!'' Yeah, sorry dude! Aah, whatever. ''[Blake saunters off]'' Hmm.

''[Angelica]'' All the lovely things we r- I read in the Bible. Lalalalalalalaa. Lovely things, inna Bible. Good story. ''[Magi-chan]'' Mmm, what stories are you reading about there, Angelica? ''Oh, this one, I'm reading about [[Sega|Genesis]]. The story of Adam and Eve!'' Ah yes. And then the apple gets bitten. ''YOU SPOILED IT FOR ME!! [Pause] I suppose next you're gonna tell me who gets thrown out first.'' I won't, I'll just uh, give you respect, there. ''Thank you. [Pause] Oh no, Eve gets kicked out first? [Whine] Well, at least we women grew to power eventually.'' Yeah. ''[Awkward pause]'' ''Praaaise Jesus in all his lov- in all his... forgiveness for us, he died for our sins and everything.'' Yes, we are Christians. We go to church every Sunday. ''An' Nanny takes us!'' Yeah. And Chris comes with us too! [[Chris and religion|He's a good Christian, yes he is.]] ''So what you wanna do now?'' Let's go play with Legos! ''Okay! Wheeee! We're off to play with Legos!''

''[Long pause. Punchy and Bubbles come into view, before being hastily retracted. Chris mumbles to himself before replacing Bubbles with Wild Sonichu]'' Hey Wild, you wanna spar a li'l? Okay Punchy! ''[Punchy launches himself at Wild, falls over]'' Huh. Got me there. ''[Wild "hits" Punchy]'' Got me again. Well, I'm gonna get you now. PEWWWW! ''[Punchy flies into Wild, both go offscreen. Punchy returns alone]'' Oh, shoot. I [[Mypoe|knocked him out da window!]] Yo c'mon[?], come in back in da window! ''I'm really hurt! You had me lyin' in a bush!'' I'm sorry. ''[Awkward silence]'' Aah, it's okay. Just be careful to watch yer punches. Cuz I gotta pull my punches if I wanna work[?] inside the nursery. ''Yeah.'' So, I'll do that. ''[Punchy comes forward]'' Because, [[Death threats|violence is not always the answer]] to e- is not always the answer. So- ye- uh, self defense, it ''can'' be... the answer. ''[Wild moves in front of Punchy]'' ''I agree. I don't like being bullied. Me, I was- b- m- I was out there riding my... bicycle the other day, an' [[Clyde Cash|bully]] comes up to me, and he, he g-steals the bicycle and he [[Kick the Autistic|beats me up]]! What's wrong with that dude?'' D'ya want me to go beat him up? ''Nah, I just need to learn self defense.'' I'm gonna go find and [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|beat him up]]. Hiyaaa! ''[Both launch out of frame, but Wild returns] Ya don't even know what he looks like, where ya goin' Punchy? ...Anyway. [Turns around once, leaves]''

''[Punchy re-enters]'' Th-you can't beat me Punchy[?], I'm [[Random-access humor|comical]], knock knock, who's there, orange, orange who, orange you glad I didn't say banana? ''[Pause]'' What? ''[Pause]'' Oh well. Knock knock. Who's there. Uhh, hello? What d'you mean, "hello". Well you said "who's there". Dyeah knock knock joke? I say "knock knock", you say "who's there". What? I stayed up watching [[Officer Keino|Home Movies]] one night. Place- It's a funny cartoon show with Brendon Small[?]. [[Sonichu 8|Not recommended for children]], though. It- still maybe teenagers. Or youth- or you- think it's a PG rating. TV-PG. ''[Jiggles around]'' I don't care I watched it by myself! I was up, I was wirey! I couldn't go to sleep! ''[Is still for a second, before leaving somewhat abruptly.]''

''[Sonee and Rosee return]'' ''Okay so... What should we do now?'' I think let's go play House! ''Yeah let's go play House again!'' Yay! Doodoodoodooboodoodoo, hi honey I'm home. ''Oh, where've you been? Mmm, I mean, how was your day sweetheart?'' It's been good, y'know, I've just been, uh, doing business and everything. M-keepin' everything- keepin' the city safe with my swift speed and lightning attacks! ''Very good. I've been minding the children. Although when I went out, I wa- I was intercepted by one of the villains! But I- gre- myself at self defence, [[The Incredible Lioness|I struck them right back!]] And I stood my ground.'' ''[Pause]'' That's very good. How're the children. ''I think I just told you that. [She didn't.]'' Oh yes you did! The children are good! Hey- okay- so- that was good, let's do role reversal. ''Okay!''

''[Switch places]'' ''Hi honey, I'm home!'' Oh hi honey, how was w- how was- how was your work at [[Jackie|journalism]]? ''Oh, very good, I wrote- guh story here, and there. [Pause] The bank was robbed.'' There was a v- there was a bank robbery? ''Yeah, didn't you hear that? There was a horse and mane[????]!'' Horse and mane? ''Sure, the horse was on the main!'' ''[Pause]'' What? Iunno. Go figure. Comedy. Anyway, [unintelligible], and I made, bulublugh, and I made, promotion!'' Very good. The children have been doi- have been doin' good today. I mean theyuh, the [[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-]] I mean uh, the younger one [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|pooped all over the place]]. Ugh, that was a whole bunch to clean up. And, uh... and the older one missed the toilet! I didn't know what to do with that, 'cept to clean it up, and tell her that it was wrong to do it in that direction, not to [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|aim it this way]], that. So I've been cleanin' and cookin' and keeping house all day long. ''And I've been out journalism all day.'' Yeah. ''[Pause]'' Anyway uh, today was grocery shopping day so I went out for groceries. S- an' children ha- and children... went with me. I took them along with me. And, they were okay in the car for a little while but then there was a scr- then on the way home there was a screaming. Yeah, the younger one was tired. Just waawaawaawaawaa. Waaa. ''[Pause]'' So the older one kept- kept the, uh- kept the younger one quiet, you know. At least she knew better. So, she calmed him down. ''That's good.'' I had to change a few diapers to- I had to change a whole number of diapers for that little one. What a mess. But I'm willing to go through with it, because I am the father! The house husband. ''And I'm the one that goes out, make the money.'' Okay. So. Wanna end the show. ''Why not?'' The puppet show. Alright. Yeah. Sonichu babies! Yaaay! Dudududududuh!

''[Feet come back into view]'' Dududududududuh! Duh duh! ''Thank you very much, goodnight!'' Goodnight.

==See also==

*[[A Sonichu Day]]
*[[Sonichu 3]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[A Workout]]|nextlink=[[PlayingHouse]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Pregnant Act

2010-10-20T04:59:05Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

[[File:128747284554.png|thumb|Artist's rendition]]
[[File:JuniorMoviePoster.png|thumb|left|Leaked footage of the upcoming blockbuster movie]]

'''Pregnant Act''' is a creepy video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]]. In this video, we see more of Chris's [[Homos|transgender]] urges (while being able to physically see very little), as the scene begins with what amounts to a [[Chris and reality|biologically impossible]] (on multiple levels) self-impregnation, Chris having received what is presumably [[Jackie]]'s egg cell, which he has fertilized with his own [[navy]]. The 'pregnancy' is given form by padding under Chris's shirt, including the [[Plush Breasts|plush breasts]], in a scene straight out of Ed Gein's Bedtime Stories.

Having effectively screwed himself, the next scene has Chris on his back like some freakish turtle, futily attempting to right himself (with notable actual effort, and not just acting). The nightmare continues with the birthing scene, Chris now pointing the camera at his own crotch, and completing the birth by tossing a [[Li'l Chris|teddy bear]] onto his... knees.

Finally, in a scene vaguely resembling [[Family Guy]], ManMom Chris has his stomach exposed, and the plush breasts stuffed down his [[sports bra]], while he forces the bear to suckle from the surely diseased, alkaline, bleach-smelling teat.

Chris removed the video the following day, and uploaded a newly recorded version shortly after.
{{clear}}

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Pregnant Act
| video = {{#ev:youtube|j7I2QBukJ4Y}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Male pregnancy}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{VerticalRedYellowShirt|text}}, {{Cwcbra|text}}, {{K-SwissShirt|text}}
| previous = [[100 2281]]
| next = [[Breast Cancer Awareness]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

Oh my god... look at me! Huh! My girlfriend reverse-impregnated me! The egg came out of her, and got into me! When we were having sexxxsss... oh my gosh. Goodness... [''camera fumbling then jump cut'']

Hm. Ugh. Goodness its difficult to get up these days, with number one in the way. Oof! Little heavy made me fall down. Made me fall down! [''camera fumbling''] Maybe I try... and see if get up. Oop! I fell down again! [''mumbling''] Let me tell you... oof! Ahh! [''grunts, then jump cut'']

Oh my goodness, it's a big one! [''grunts, strains, and mumbles''] Must watch breath... one two three! [''gasps''] EEeeaaahhhhgh! Ah! [''throws a stuffed bear onto lap''] Well! Congratulate me! I gave birth to a little beautiful baby... bear. And she's [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|female]]! Goodness... wow. [''jump cut'']

It's baby's open that's right little child. Eat all you want out of there. You eat all you want out of there. [''an electronic toy says "I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!"''] Ha! First w-her first words! [[30 August 2009|We]] love you too!

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2281]]|nextlink=[[Breast Cancer Awareness]]}}

==The Remake==
Chris removed the original video on 19 October, and uploaded a new version of the video shortly after.
{{Infobox/video
| name = Pregnant Act
| video = {{#ev:youtube|sC8392Td5r4}}
| stardate = 19 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Male pregnancy}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{VertRedGreenShirt|text}}, {{Cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[A Public Announcement for Congress]]
| next = [[A Workout]]
}}

===Transcript===

Oh my goodness me look at this I had sex with my girlfriend and it backfired on me, can’t believe this. Her egg went inside my [[Duck|dick]] and now it’s- now it’s been in me for like 9 months. Engh mani’m gunna get these stretch marks in a little while…ummgh dang. egh [[Obesity|laying down it’s hard for me to get back up again]]. Eeeaauuh, ung ung ung! Ehh! Well that was a major push, hope I didn’t lose it there! Erro here come- aaa ahhh think [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|it’s coming out the back]]…think it’s coming out the - aaaaa one two three one two three. Engh! Engh! ENNGGHHHHHAAA! Well will you look at that, I gave birth to a beautiful baby... girl bear! [''Chris has his shirt pulled up, exposing his muscle bra and pale fish-belly, the bear is pressed up against the plush breasts''] You- no- little babies drinking my breast milk. Yeah you enjoy that don’t ya? My lil- my lil girl.

[''an electronic toy says "I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!"''] Hmm.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]|nextlink=[[A Workout]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

A Public Announcement for Congress

2010-10-19T17:09:42Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcript */

'''A Public Announcement for Congress''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]]. The "for Congress" part apparently represents some confusion or misconception, because the video actually consists of a stump speech directed at the American people, outlining the policies Chris would advance if he were president. Keeping in line with his nonexistent knowledge of modern politics, and given his stated political stances and views, Chris seems to be unaware that 2nd Amendment rights are often a primary issue for conservative voters, as well that it is routine for Republican candidates to display homophobic views and policies.

Chris offers a number of initiatives that would give [[tugboat|free money]] to [[Bob|senior citizens]] and [[Inos|the homeless]], while also proposing that taxes be slashed to a tiny fraction of their current rates. In addition, he suggests that all of the guns should go to the [[jerkops|police]], and would only be redistributed in case of attack from [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|another nation]] or [[Chris and reality|another planet]].

Also, [[Homos|gay people]] would be accepted in his [[CWCVille|Utopian society]], so long as he didn't have to notice that they exist. He makes the claim that gay marriage will be allowed in all U.N. member nations, despite various international laws, sovereignties, and treaties that all basically mean that the President of the United States has no such decisive say in the policies of the various countries of the U.N. Finally, he suggests a police state in which emails and other forms of online communication are constantly monitored in order to prevent trolling. Whether the trolls would be [[03212010_C-Ya_Later.MOV|tortured bad]] for their actions has yet to be announced.

He also tries to translate Clyde Cash's name into Spanish, failing miserably. As you don't translate names, but if one did, it would be ''Dinero'', not "Cashez", and the last name would still go last. Also, "de(l) ___" suffixes tend to be titles and honorifics. Thus, if names were to be translated, Clyde may be ''Clyde Dinero del Oro'', lit: "Clyde Cash of the Gold."

In yet [[Twin Falling Towers|another display]] of Chris's patriotism, he calls the [[United States of America|United States]] the United Nations. Whether this is him wanting to expand his control to other nations or a legitimate mistake is unknown.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Public Announcement for Congress
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ghfoOqS2mM8}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Politics}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = Unknown White T
| previous = [[Vitameatavegamin]]
| next = Current
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[Image:Dope1.jpg|thumb|CWC [[2008]]]]

Good evening, friends. As your presidential candidate, I will now state how I feel (''Chris makes an odd kicking motion''), what we can do to improve this, [[United States of America|these nations, these states]]. For one thing, we got so many [[Inos|poor people out on the streets]]. I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have soup beds. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS! So that there would be a bed for every homeless person until they can get back up on their own feet. Also, lower taxes. I will propose lower taxes, and we shall not have to pay so much. Five percent is okay, but why not two point five percent? And we will not cut off any benefits for the old people. They are good. And we shall give them plenty of money so they can afford the medications and services to keep them alive, because we do not pay for when we are sick, we pay for our [[Chris and health|good health!]] And we only pay after we're healthy. We're in good health. We pay to stay alive, we do not pay to die.

And, speaking of which, too much [[Sonichu 10|violence]] goes on within these city streets. I will propose only gun distribution to the official authority, which shall be the post-, which shall be within the [[Jerkops|police departments]]. Nowhere else. And all guns owned by locals, community people, shall be taken away. At least the bullets. When the bullets are necessary, or when there is an outbreak of violence from another [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|nation]] or [[Chris and reality|planet]], then we shall issue the bullets. At all-, at free stations, to be opened immediately. Otherwise we'll send in our special troops. Our [[Chaotic Combo|special force]].

(''A long pause, where Chris becomes visibly agitated'')

And also (''another pause''), we will be okay to have the gays (''noticably grimaces'') within our community, we will be okay to have the gays within our community. In all states! There will be gay marriage ability for every state within the [[Fail|United Nations]]. I mean, keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody, 'cause mup- the- mag- [[Family Guy|what may be right for you, may not be right for most. For some. You take the good from the bad and then you get an opening statement like mine.]]

People need to appreciate life, so we will not have to face death. I lost my train of thought there, but that's okay. I am only human! We are all human! I am a noble, honest person. No matter what e'erbody else may say, even on the Internet, and my opponent, [[Clyde Cash|Señor Cachez de Clyyyyde]]. He tells liiies about me! And so do the trolls that have be-trolled me over the Internet. Their jeers, and non-cheers, do not go appreciated. Because it is not everybody who can take a joke. Even when it's at their own expense.

And with that, I will propose Internet securities, reinforced by the FBI, and there will be patrol stations of the Trollbusters around these United States. Any repor-, any troll activity that you may be suspicious of an individual, you report to your local authority! And they will tell, and then they will inform the local FBI station within that state. And then they will investigate thoroughly! Over the wireless that is called the Internet! And they will trace the e-mails back to the origin home address or location. And they will be apprehended and fined or sentenced, depending on how CRUEL they are to the [[Chris|victim]].

I stand strong, I stand firm, I AM A NOBLE LEADER! And if I am elected, I will do my best to keep our America strong and sound, and not go down the drain. I'm sorry, [[Obama]], I did vote for you, but I gotta agree with my father, you are bringing us, somuss- some of the situations downhill. But I have nothing against you because I did vote for you. And I liked your documentary on A&E. I would shake your hand at the first opportunity I would to meet you, Mr. President.

And thou- er- fore, I shall conclude my opening statement. In the candisacy of the president, I say, I will do my best! And I am not lazy! Thank you.

This ad is not real. I'm not being, going to be elected president, but I tell the truth nonetheless of what I would do if I were to become president. Thank you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gilligan Be or Not]]|nextlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress|Current]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

A Public Announcement for Congress

2010-10-19T17:02:44Z

Travis Cwckle:

'''A Public Announcement for Congress''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]]. The "for Congress" part apparently represents some confusion or misconception, because the video actually consists of a stump speech directed at the American people, outlining the policies Chris would advance if he were president. Keeping in line with his nonexistent knowledge of modern politics, and given his stated political stances and views, Chris seems to be unaware that 2nd Amendment rights are often a primary issue for conservative voters, as well that it is routine for Republican candidates to display homophobic views and policies.

Chris offers a number of initiatives that would give [[tugboat|free money]] to [[Bob|senior citizens]] and [[Inos|the homeless]], while also proposing that taxes be slashed to a tiny fraction of their current rates. In addition, he suggests that all of the guns should go to the [[jerkops|police]], and would only be redistributed in case of attack from [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|another nation]] or [[Chris and reality|another planet]].

Also, [[Homos|gay people]] would be accepted in his [[CWCVille|Utopian society]], so long as he didn't have to notice that they exist. He makes the claim that gay marriage will be allowed in all U.N. member nations, despite various international laws, sovereignties, and treaties that all basically mean that the President of the United States has no such decisive say in the policies of the various countries of the U.N. Finally, he suggests a police state in which emails and other forms of online communication are constantly monitored in order to prevent trolling. Whether the trolls would be [[03212010_C-Ya_Later.MOV|tortured bad]] for their actions has yet to be announced.

He also tries to translate Clyde Cash's name into Spanish, failing miserably. As you don't translate names, but if one did, it would be ''Dinero'', not "Cashez", and the last name would still go last. Also, "de(l) ___" suffixes tend to be titles and honorifics. Thus, if names were to be translated, Clyde may be ''Clyde Dinero del Oro'', lit: "Clyde Cash of the Gold."

In yet [[Twin Falling Towers|another display]] of Chris's patriotism, he calls the [[United States of America|United States]] the United Nations. Whether this is him wanting to expand his control to other nations or a legitimate mistake is unknown.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = A Public Announcement for Congress
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ghfoOqS2mM8}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Politics}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = Unknown White T
| previous = [[Vitameatavegamin]]
| next = Current
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[Image:Dope1.jpg|thumb|CWC [[2008]]]]

Good evening, friends. As your presidential candidate, I will now state how I feel (''Chris makes an odd kicking motion''), what we can do to improve this, [[United States of America|these nations, these states]]. For one thing, we got so many [[Inos|poor people out on the streets]]. I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have soup beds. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS! So that there would be a bed for every homeless person until they can get back up on their own feet. Also, lower taxes. I will propose lower taxes, and we shall not have to pay so much. Five percent is okay, but why not two point five percent? And we will not cut off any benefits for the old people. They are good. And we shall give them plenty of money so they can afford the medications and services to keep them alive, because we do not pay for when we are sick, we pay for our good health! And we only pay after we're healthy. We're in good health. We pay to stay alive, we do not pay to die.

And, speaking of which, too much [[Sonichu 10|violence]] goes on within these city streets. I will propose only gun distribution to the official authority, which shall be the post-, which shall be within the [[Jerkops|police departments]]. Nowhere else. And all guns owned by locals, community people, shall be taken away. At least the bullets. When the bullets are necessary, or when there is an outbreak of violence from another [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|nation]] or [[Chris and reality|planet]], then we shall issue the bullets. At all-, at free stations, to be opened immediately. Otherwise we'll send in our special troops. Our [[Chaotic Combo|special force]].

(''A long pause, where Chris becomes visibly agitated'')

And also (''another pause''), we will be okay to have the gays (''noticably grimaces'') within our community, we will be okay to have the gays within our community. In all states! There will be gay marriage ability for every state within the [[Fail|United Nations]]. I mean, keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody, 'cause mup- the- mag- [[Family Guy|what may be right for you, may not be right for most. For some. You take the good from the bad and then you get an opening statement like mine.]]

People need to appreciate life, so we will not have to face death. I lost my train of thought there, but that's okay. I am only human! We are all human! I am a noble, honest person. No matter what e'erbody else may say, even on the Internet, and my opponent, [[Clyde Cash|Señor Cachez de Clyyyyde]]. He tells liiies about me! And so do the trolls that have be-trolled me over the Internet. Their jeers, and non-cheers, do not go appreciated. Because it is not everybody who can take a joke. Even when it's at their own expense.

And with that, I will propose Internet securities, reinforced by the FBI, and there will be patrol stations of the Trollbusters around these United States. Any repor-, any troll activity that you may be suspicious of an individual, you report to your local authority! And they will tell, and then they will inform the local FBI station within that state. And then they will investigate thoroughly! Over the wireless that is called the Internet! And they will trace the e-mails back to the origin home address or location. And they will be apprehended and fined or sentenced, depending on how CRUEL they are to the [[Chris|victim]].

I stand strong, I stand firm, I AM A NOBLE LEADER! And if I am elected, I will do my best to keep our America strong and sound, and not go down the drain. I'm sorry, [[Obama]], I did vote for you, but I gotta agree with my father, you are bringing us, somuss- some of the situations downhill. But I have nothing against you because I did vote for you. And I liked your documentary on A&E. I would shake your hand at the first opportunity I would to meet you, Mr. President.

And thou- er- fore, I shall conclude my opening statement. In the candisacy of the president, I say, I will do my best! And I am not lazy! Thank you.

This ad is not real. I'm not being, going to be elected president, but I tell the truth nonetheless of what I would do if I were to become president. Thank you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Gilligan Be or Not]]|nextlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress|Current]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

ECV 00001

2010-10-10T12:13:40Z

Travis Cwckle: /* Transcription */

[[File:CryingIndian.jpg|thumb|Iron Eyes Cody weeps from all that has been lost.]]
[[File:johnredcorn.jpg|thumb|left|John Redcorn does not approve.]]

'''ECV 00001''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 9 [[October 2010]], in which he paraphrases [[Wikipedia:Cherokee|the Wikipedia article]] about the [[Cherokee]] while dressed as what he thinks they looked like.

Throughout the video, he holds a [[PlayStation]] Move controller and a matching "Navigation Controller", probably to show off his purchase in the delusion that anyone gives a shit. (It is, however, refreshing to note that all of the [[sex toys|dildo jokes]] about the Move do ''not'' deter a True PlayStation Fan.) Chris has also returned to using his old [[PSEye]] to record this video, which causes a number of skips to occur throughout the video. As is evident in the video title, the EyeCreate video counter has been reset to 1, due to his [[PS3#The Rebirth|new PS3]].

Of note is how Chris is careful to elaborate how peaceful the Cherokee clan was, specifically how [[Prickly-Wicklies|war is bad]], yet he pulls a 180 near the end by stating how fierce they were and that the [[Death threats|trolls should beware.]] Chris, always sensitive to the plight of minorities, speaks in a stereotypical "kemosabe" style Indian voice until he starts talking about black people at which point he starts speaking in a hip, urban manner in order to show that he is [[Retarded|"down"]].

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00001
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mum48216-C0}}
| stardate = 9 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}
| style =
| saga =
| shirt = {{Cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[100 2270]]
| next = [[A Hike]]
}}

=== Transcription ===
''[Chris is wearing his muscle bra with construction paper accents to give his impression of a very very [[homos|fierce]] Cherokee warrior, he has his arms crossed over his chest with a Playstation controller in each hand]''

Me noble Cherokee Man. I come to you with a brief bit of introduction to our Cherokee clan. We were a peaceful lace... peaceful race, most of our history is encrypted within Spanish history. Some of it was previously uh translated, was translated, as can— found on The Wikipedia under the term "Cherokee" [[Fail|C-H-R-O-K-''E''-''E''.]]

We were very peaceful, [[wikipedia:King of the Hill|I tell ya what.]] We were so peaceful, that we found war activities to be a polluting activity. And we had and a whole and before it was revoked we had purity sessions of which our priests of our clans purified the warriors that went out into battle before they come into to the village and resume life there. And we were even bartered as [[Rosechu|slut]]— bartered off as slaves to the [[Virginia]] and north and northward.

And we had a whole bunch of medishin [[Tobacky|medicianal supstances]] that were created within our times by our [[Chris and Religion#Chris the Shaman|witch doctors]], which I happen to have a witch doctor. His name is on my thing there, but [[Honor roll|I forgot memorize it.]] Which he comes from the Chandler Clan on my [[Bob Chandler|father's]] side. It was a good union, though, between my father meeting my mother for she comes from the [[Daniel Weston|English clan]], but we were here in America first and we had our own tortures. And through a whole bunch of trials and tribulations, we ended up walking the Trail Of Tears.

Which, beyond which, as we walked the trail, some of us wandered off the trail to be hidden from those that have considered us slaves. Unfortunately, thanks to our right— thanks to our guys, slavery has abolished altogether, including— including the [[Niggos|black slaves]]. Though I not say that, it was of an consasensus...

''[Chris suddenly changes from offensive Indian imitation to offensive urban patois]''

Hey, we're with you on this one dude we're with you on this one dudes. I mean, we were slaves as well back in the day. But we've managed to collect ourselves, and there only a few of us left within this America and mostly there are only partial regions with us, but there are orginisations of us Cherokees within states like Oklahoma and Tennesee. More information on this as well as our history on The Wikipedia. Also, we did go off out in battle after that practice was abolished. Of which we have purified our warriors before they could return to our village. We were fierce though. We were very very fierce. But anyway, with that, don't mess with us. For we will [[CWC is Angry|shoot you]] [[Gun Comic|down]]. Pew! ''[Pantomimes shooting a bow and arrow]''

==See also==
*[[War Paint Video]]
*[[Cherokian Clan]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2270]]|nextlink=[[A Hike]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

ECV 00001

2010-10-10T07:14:29Z

Travis Cwckle:

[[File:CryingIndian.jpg|thumb|Iron Eyes Cody weeps from all that has been lost.]]
[[File:johnredcorn.jpg|thumb|left|John Redcorn does not approve.]]

'''ECV 00001''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 9 [[October 2010]], in which he paraphrases [[Wikipedia:Cherokee|the Wikipedia article]] about the [[Cherokee]] while dressed as what he thinks they looked like. Throughout the video, he holds a [[PlayStation]] Move controller and a matching "Navigation Controller", probably to show off his purchase in the delusion that anyone gives a shit. Chris has also returned to using his old [[PSEye]] to record this video, which causes a number of skips to occur throughout the video. Of note is how Chris is careful to elaborate how peaceful the Cherokee clan was, specifically how [[Prickly-Wicklies|war is bad]], yet he pulls a 180 near the end by stating how fierce they were and that the [[Death threats|trolls should beware.]] Chris, always sensitive to the plight of minorities, speaks in a stereotypical "kemosabe" style Indian voice until he starts talking about black people at which point he starts speaking in a hip, urban manner in order to show that he is [[Retarded|"down"]].

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00001
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mum48216-C0}}
| stardate = 9 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}
| style =
| saga =
| shirt = {{Cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[100 2270]]
| next = [[A Hike]]
}}

=== Transcription ===
''[Chris is wearing his muscle bra with construction paper accents to give his impression of a very very [[homos|fierce]] Cherokee warrior, he has his arms crossed over his chest with a Playstation controller in each hand]''

Me noble Cherokee Man. I come to you with a brief bit of introduction to our Cherokee clan. We were a peaceful lace... peaceful race, most of our history is encrypted within Spanish history. Some of it was previously uh translated, was translated, as found on The Wikipedia under the term "Cherokee" C-H-E-R-O-K-E-E.

We were very peaceful, [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_of_the_hill I tell ya what.] We were so peaceful, that we found war activities to be a polluting activity. And we had and a whole and before it was revoked we had purity sessions of which our priests of our clans purified the warriors that went out into battle before they come into to the village and resume life there. And we were even bartered as [[Rosechu|sluts]] bartered off as slaves to the [[Virginia]] and north and northward.

And we had a whole bunch of medishin [[Tobacky|medicianal supstances]] that were created within our times by our witch doctors, which I happen to have a witch doctor. His name is on my thing there, but [[Honor_roll|I forgot memorize it.]] Which he comes from the Chandler Clan on my father's side. It was a good union, though, between my father meeting my mother for she comes from the [[Daniel Weston|English clan]], but we were here in America first and we had our own tortures. And through a whole bunch of trials and tribulations, we ended up walking the Trail Of Tears.

Of which, as we walked the trail, some of us wandered off the trail to be hidden from those that have considered us slaves. Unfortunately, thanks to our right... thanks to our guys, slavery has been abolished altogether, including the [[Niggos|black slaves]]. Though I not say that, it was of an consasensus...

''[Chris suddenly changes from offensive Indian imitation to offensive urban patois]''

Hey, we're with you on this one dude we're with you on this one dudes. I mean, we were slaves as well back in the day. But we've managed to collect ourselves, and there only a few of us left within this America and mostly there are only partial regions with us, but there are orginisations of us Cherokees within states like Oklahoma and Tennesee. More information on this as well as our history on The Wikipedia. Also, we did go off out in battle after that practice was abolished. Of which we have purified our warriors before they could return to our village. We were fierce though. We were very very fierce. But anyway, with that, don't mess with us. For we will [[CWC is Angry|shoot you]] [[Gun Comic|down]]. Pew! ''[Pantomimes shooting a bow and arrow]''

==See also==
*[[War Paint Video]]
*[[Cherokian Clan]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2270]]|nextlink=[[A Hike]]}}

ECV 00001

2010-10-10T07:01:11Z

Travis Cwckle:

[[File:CryingIndian.jpg|thumb|Iron Eyes Cody weeps from all that has been lost.]]
[[File:johnredcorn.jpg|thumb|left|John Redcorn does not approve.]]

'''ECV 00001''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 9 [[October 2010]], in which he paraphrases [[Wikipedia:Cherokee|the Wikipedia article]] about the [[Cherokee]] while dressed as what he thinks they looked like. Throughout the video, he holds a [[PlayStation]] Move controller and a matching "Navigation Controller", probably to show off his purchase in the delusion that anyone gives a shit. Chris has also returned to using his old [[PSEye]] to record this video, which causes a number of skips to occur throughout the video. Of note is how Chris is careful to elaborate how peaceful the Cherokee clan was, specifically how [[Prickly-Wicklies|war is bad]], yet he pulls a 180 near the end by stating how fierce they were and that the [[Death threats|trolls should beware.]] Chris, always sensitive to the plight of minorities, speaks in a stereotypical "kemosabe" style Indian voice until he starts talking about black people at which point he starts speaking in a hip, urban manner in order to show that he is [[Retarded|"down"]].

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00001
| video = {{#ev:youtube|mum48216-C0}}
| stardate = 9 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}
| style =
| saga =
| shirt = {{Cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[100 2270]]
| next = [[A Hike]]
}}

=== Transcription ===
''[Chris is wearing his muscle bra with construction paper accents to give his impression of a very very [[homos|fierce]] Cherokee warrior, he has his arms crossed over his chest with a Playstation controller in each hand]''

Me noble Cherokee Man. I come to you with a brief bit of introduction to our Cherokee clan. We were a peaceful lace... peaceful race, most of our history is encrypted within Spanish history. Some of it was previously uh translated, was translated, as found on The Wikipedia under the term "Cherokee" C-H-E-R-O-K-E-E.

We were very peaceful, [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_of_the_hill I tell ya what.] We were so peaceful, that we found war activities to be a polluting activity. And we had and a whole and before it was revoked we had purity sessions of which our priests of our clans purified the warriors that went out into battle before they come into to the village and resume life there. And we were even bartered as [[Rosechu|sluts]] bartered off as slaves to the Virginia and north and northward.

And we had a whole bunch of medishin [[Tobacky|medicianal supstances]] that were created within our times by our witch doctors, which I happen to have a witch doctor. His name is on my thing there, but [[Honor_roll|I forgot memorize it.]] Which he comes from the Chandler Clan on my father's side. It was a good union, though, between my father meeting my mother for she comes from the [[Daniel Weston|English clan]], but we were here in America first and we had our own tortures. And through a whole bunch of trials and tribulations, we ended up walking the Trail Of Tears.

Of which, as we walked the trail, some of us wandered off the trail to be hidden from those that have considered us slaves. Unfortunately, thanks to our right... thanks to our guys, slavery has been abolished altogether, including the [[Niggos|black slaves]]. Though I not say that, it was of an consasensus...

''[Chris suddenly changes from offensive Indian imitation to offensive urban patois]''

Hey, we're with you on this one dude we're with you on this one dudes. I mean, we were slaves as well back in the day. But we've managed to collect ourselves, and there only a few of us left within this America and mostly there are only partial regions with us, but there are orginisations of us Cherokees within states like Oklahoma and Tennesee. More information on this as well as our history on The Wikipedia. Also, we did go off out in battle after that practice was abolished. Of which we have purified our warriors before they could return to our village. We were fierce though. We were very very fierce. But anyway, with that, don't mess with us. For we will [[CWC is Angry|shoot you]] [[Gun Comic|down]]. Pew! ''[Pantomimes shooting a bow and arrow]''

==See also==
*[[War Paint Video]]
*[[Cherokian Clan]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2270]]|nextlink=[[A Hike]]}}

Gregg Mays E-mails

2010-09-24T08:12:20Z

Travis Cwckle: /* I KNOW 1/8/09 */

==Sonichu.Net Redesign for Nintendo Please Reply ASAP 1/6/09==
{{quoteboxred|Hello, Mr. Christian Chandler

I am [[Gregg Mays]], hired by [[Nintendo]] to redesign your website in order to prepare the [[Sonichu]] promotion for [[Animal Crossing]].

This is the design that was approved by the administration over at Nintendo.

I'm planning on updating most of the website tonight. Let me know when is the best time for me to update the site.

Do not worry, I will include a helpful guide on how to update your site with comics and messages after the redesign.

Sincerely,

Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|I see. But please clearify for me; you sent me an image that would have appeared on Nintendo.com; are you updating Nintendo.com or asking to update [[Sonichu.net]]?

Please Clearify, and I will work with you on this.

Peace,
Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quotebox|Also, my Australian [[Sweetheart]], [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie]] is trusted with the information around Sonichu.net, as well as her own created Sub-Domain for Sonichu.net, The Offical Sonichu and Rosechu Fan Site; I advise checking in with her as well on the reconstruction; maybe even inprove her Fan Site. Her e-mail address is pandahalo@gmail.com.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

This is Gregg Mays.

Nintendo would like to host all Sonichu related materials on Sonichu.Net while keeping the Nintendo design. If you do not like the Nintendo design, I can work with Nintendo on updating or revising.

Please get back to me asap, I would like to install some databases to set up the forums by tonight.

Sincerely,

Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|It's cool; I just wanted to get a better understanding of the situation. I will still be able to make my updates to Sonichu.net that I have planned and any future ones as well, correct? If that is the case, I wish some of your recommended HTML code in notepad format, in addition to your guidelines. I appreciate Nintendo's input in the project, and I approve you of your work that you were hired to do. Please also send me the links to all pages related in this.

Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

The update process is done through PHP while the design itself is CSS. There will be a form that will allow you to make news posts as well as add new sections and subsections to the website. This is why I must install a database for your website in order for these new updates to take place. You will no longer have to use HTML, instead simply login to a form to update your website.

Right now, I must first install a database.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Okay. I await your completion, and information on how I can log in and do what I need to do.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

To further clarify the updating scheme, here is a pictoral representation of what my plan is.

I will be using the base coding from Nintendo as an example.

1: Current location of the user.
2: Home page
3: Section
4: Subsection

You will be able to edit the home page (although Nintendo would like to use a promotional Sonichu and Rosechu Animal Crossing front page until its release), edit or add new sections and subsections through a form.

It is a very simple system that I plan to implement and hope to do a test run tonight.

I will need to update your website to add a database and need your help to test the implementation.

I will also need a separate username and password as your official account for the new system.

I have taken it upon myself to convert your entire website into this new format (skeletal, meaning there may be some HTML errors, but easily fixable)

If you wish to make any changes after the test run is complete, feel free to do so.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

Could you please send a response within the next hour so I may begin work. Thank you.

Also, Nintendo has received notice of your AC video on your YouTube account.

They would like for you to make a promotional video including:

Introduce yourself.
Promote and explain Sonichu.
Promote and explain Rosechu.
Promote Animal Crossing: City Folk.

Sincerely,

Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I have done everything I can on my end of the website. I have finished the updating system which you may take a look here. Please supply a username and password for you to demo the system and the details for Sonichu.Net so I can update your site with this system. Thank you.

Sincerely,

Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I assume you are busy and will get back to me with the details ASAP. I was planning on bringing up the forums tonight; however, since I assume you are doing other important duties at the moment, I will let you get back to me tomorrow.

I apologize for springing this on you so fast. I just need to get this work finished.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

==1/7/09==

{{quotebox|Thank you for understanding, Gregg. I had to get [[biological_clock|my daily amount of sleep]], but all is green for you. Please make my username for the new thing, "sonichuchandler", and the password to be "nutmeg"; I'll change it later.

As for the password for the tripod account that hosts the pages of Sonichu.net, I understand your need to update it as well, but I don't wish to disclose the password so easily. I feel it adequate if you check in with my Sweetheart and partner, Sarah, on pandahalo@gmail.com; I have informed her of your cooperation in the project. She is capable of identifying e-mails from people, and she has an excellent "Sixth Sense" (if you will) in emotionally determining the true people from the [[trolls]] she and I had to deal with. She also has the current password to the tripod account behind Sonichu.net; we've agreed on its recent, more complicated change mutually.

I hope this helps you in your work. Thank you very much.

Peace,
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler

I have contacted Sarah and hope to receive a good response so I can work on the website later tonight. I plan to add the beta version of my blog/website updater and the forums, hopefully by tonight if all goes well. For now, I have some other clients I must work with. Please reply in about four hours if all goes well. Thanks.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Mr. Mays, I thank you for getting in touch with Sarah. I have been busy today editing the pages of my previous and recent [[Comic]] Books. Earlier, I did think to check with the Lawer of Nintendo who I have been in good contact with and my associate behind Animal Crossing City Folk to verify you for trust.

I will get back to you with my decision of entrusting you with my Tripod password or not as soon as I hear from either of them, or Sarah.

Peace,
Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler

I'd really like to get working tonight. The lawyer of Nintendo is for Nintendo of Japan, correct? I was hired by Nintendo of America so I don't know about these people. Could you refer them to me so I can get them in touch with my employer?

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|The lawer I'm talking to is James Zylberstein of Nintendo of America.}}

{{quotebox|I've promised the edits and reuploadings of Past Comic Pages, and I am currently uploading the re-edited pages after a whole day of re-editing. So, with all due respect, my own personal routine and the routine-parts of my [[Autism]], I'd like to finish updating the pages and Sonichu.net as I have previously promised James, Mr. [[Miyamoto]] and the rest of Nintendo of [[America]] and Japan, before I entrust it to anyone else's hands.

I thank you for your patience.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I understand, is it possible for you to finish tonight? I have a deadline to meet and I've set aside time for tonight. If not, that's okay, but really, this has been lingering in my mind for quite a long time. Sorry if that causes you trouble.

Sincerely
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I see what you are doing. I will make note to use the new edited version of the pages. I will not tamper with any of the images. I will only create new pages for them. I will do all the coding work. You just need to take care of the images and I'll handle the rest, does that sound good?

Sincerely
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Okay, I understand better now what you'll be doing. I will have the work finished within an hour estimated; I will e-mail you again when I am finished.}}

== 1/8/09 ==

{{quotebox|I apologize again for the delay. I am finished with my promised edits. I will entrust you; the password is 0urD4uGHt3r_[[Crystal|cRySt4L]].

Don't disappoint me, and do what you have planned.

Peace,
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

Alright, I will put up a temporarily index page informing people of the change. Please allow me around two hours to install the new software.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Something has gone wrong. I can not access the site anymore.

Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|I just got work that my job has been suspended for this client (you). Apparently the lawyer has told me that they did not finalize issues with [[Sega]] before realizing the website was initiated. I can not help you with this, I'm just a web designer. You need to speak with your lawyer to explain the [[copyright]] issues to Sega. If this ever gets cleared up, I'll get your website back up as good as new.

Sincerely, Gregg Mays}}

== You've disappointed me, sir. 1/8/09 ==

{{quotebox|Because only YOU, other than Sarah Cassandra McKenzie and myself have the Password for my Tripod account; NO ONE ELSE should have been able to access the account and put the .txt file on there. I'm not pointing fingers here, but you are pretty much the main suspect in the matter.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I did not put the files on there, Tripod must have acted with Sega on this. I do not know anything more of this matter. I'm not much of a legal guy but you have a lawyer right? Just clarify the copyright issue and everything should be fine.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|I do not have an attorney of my own; the only attorney I have been in contact with was Nintendo of America's Attorney, James Zylberstein. And I have informed him of this dilemma.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I'm sorry about this copyright thing, I'm sure it's just a misunderstanding between Nintendo and Sega, I checked your video on the [[YouTube]]. I didn't see a mention of Sega, maybe you should do that. That'll ease tensions. I gotta head back to the wife and kids. Take care, man.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

It seems you have the copyright thing under control. I can restore your site as I made a complete backup if you want. I'll be able to install some forums and get that new form system up tonight.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Yes, I have the Copyright thing under control. PLEASE RESTORE SONICHU.NET back to the way it was, RIGHT NOW! And what did you change the Tripod password to?}]

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I did not change the Tripod password. I will restore it as soon as possible.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Thank you; you have less than two hours.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I can't seem to access the site anymore. I can't work on it unless I gain access to it.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

Until you sort out these copyright issues, I'm afraid I can't help you. Tell me when you do, you'll be Numero Uno on my priority list.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

== I KNOW 1/8/09 ==

{{quotebox|I KNOW that you are REALLY a Troll, as my Lawer at Nintendo of America has Confirmed for me. SEGA has NO INTENTIONS of Suing me for any infringements, he has also informed me of.

NOW LISTEN, SIR, I WANT YOU TO RESTORE ALL THE FILES YOU'VE DELETED FROM SONICHU.NET, THE SONICHU & ROSECHU FAN SITE, CWC'S POKESITE 2 AND THE OTHER CWC SITES THAT WERE ON THERE, OR I WILL HAVE MY LAWER, HIS PEOPLE OF NINTENDO AND THE PEOPLE OF SEGA, EVEN THE POWER OF MR. MIYAMOTO HIMSELF, BRING IN A TRACKING TEAM, TRACK YOU DOWN, AND FORCE YOU TO RESTORE SONICHU.NET AND ALL, WITH A CRUEL, BEATING-UP, TERRIBLY PAINFUL PUNISHMENT!

YOU DO NOT WANT TO REMAIN ON MY BAD SIDE; MY [[Fangs|FANGS]] ARE SHARP, and I can thirst for blood, even though I am [[Cherokian Clan|Cherokee]], NOT a [[Vamprosa|vampire]].

Also, that txt file letter you left is a FAKE, I KNOW!

PUT SONICHU.NET AND ALL SITES ALONG WITH IT BACK ONTO THE TRIPOD ACCOUNT, RESET THE E-MAIL BACK TO MINE, OR I WILL BRING DOWN A WRATH OF GOD UPON YOU!}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler,

I do not have the power to change the e-mail or password. If you allow me to access the account, I can restore the entire site back to the way it was before Sega managed to tamper with your site. I can foolproof the site as well.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler,

Please look at this proof of concept I had made earlier.

http://greggmays.tripod.com/what.htm

There must have been miscommunication within Nintendo. They are a large company. I am a hired employer outside of Nintendo for the sole purpose of web design. I have a backup of your site, I can restore if you want.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|I have allowed access for you to get into my Tripod account after I impulsively entrusted you with the password. And at the time, you were able to change the e-mail address associated with it and the password. I am hardly buying your likely stories. But you should talk to my Nintendo Lawer, J.Z. at jzylberstein@lawyer.com. RESTORE SONICHU.NET and ALL FILES AND FOLDERS WITH IT!}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler,

The lawyers should be talking to you soon. Once they do, I will begin work on the website.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Look, thanks to a mistake on Sega's part, I've lost my job and now I can't feed my kids for the next week. I offered to restore the site but you wouldn't let me so the client (you) has been lost and my employer just fired me.

I am crying right now. Thanks.

Gregg Mays}}

== 1/9/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|My employer just allowed me one chance to get my job back, I have to satisfy the client (you) and restore your site. I can't do this without the access code to your website.

Please let me restore it.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Access Code? I know only of my old password, which I had entrusted into you; I have no idea about an Access Code. If you can tell me how I can find this Access Code, I will inform you of it.}}

{{quoteboxred|I mean password, I do not know the password to the site. The only way I can restore the site is by getting the password to the site. Please let me know of what the new password is.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|The password should be 0urD4uGHt3r_cRySt4L.}}

{{quoteboxred|It says:
Sorry, but the username and password you provided don't match. Please check them and try again.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

Please reset the password on your account and give it to me to restore your site.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

== 1/10/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|I cannot restore your website unless I can gain access to the Tripod account. Without it, I am unable to restore your site. I'm sorry.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays

PS, I have lost my only chance to regain my job so I'm doing this out of the goodness of my heart. Please, let me make things right.}}

{{quotebox|I feel for you, and I wish I could help, but I can't do anything about the password problem. And if I could, I would certainly be glad to help you help me and yourself. Please tell your employer that your customer pardons the job, and wishes that you not lose your job over it.

Peace,
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler

Thank you for your kindness. Right now, I'm on probation but I think it should be good for me. Let me know if you ever get access to your website and I will restore it immediately and then some. I will do the promised upgrade and I will work ever harder than ever. Thank you so much.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

== It is I, Jason Kendrick Howell! If you ever want to see your beloved site restored, you must meet my demands. 1/12/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|If you ever wish for me to hand over your beloved website, you must announce your [[homos]]exuality to YouTube.

You must not reveal that I told you to do this, otherwise you will never see your site restored!

You must detail how you've been kept in the closet for so long, your search for a sweetheart as a cover up and why Sonichu is so gay.

Toodles, 
[[Metal Gear Solid|Liquid Snake]]}}

{{quoteboxred|You must be angry! Of course, you could always make a video proclaiming how straight you are.

Either choice, gay or straight, which will it be?

Liquid Snake 
"BROTHER"}}

{{quotebox|If I make a video with a proclimation, will you give me the new password you associated my Tripod Account with?}}

{{quoteboxred|Of course, I may be an evil troll, but I never go back on my word. I have principles.

Love, Liquid Snake}}

{{quotebox|Very well; I will have the short video up soon.}}

{{quotebox|It is being processed; and it has been fully uploaded. Now please send me the password, and ALL of the files for Sarah's Sonichu & Rosechu Fan Site in a Compressed Zip Folderin your reply.}}

{{quoteboxred|SEVEN SECONDS!??! I am disappointed in you.

This is not a fair deal! I expected a 20 minute explanation of why you are straight and not gay.

I still think you are the biggest homosexual in the world so do many others, just look at your Youtube comments. You're doing yourself a favor if you make a REAL video.

Love, Liquid Snake}}

{{quotebox|Fine, if you want a full 5-10 minute explination, I'll redo the video.}}

{{quoteboxred|The longer it is, the better your fans will believe it. Look at those comments, my god, they are ruthless!

Love, Liquid Snake}}

{{quotebox|The video is being uploaded; it is about ten minutes long. Please Send me the Password and ALL of Sarah's Sonichu & Rosechu Fansite Files in a Compressed Zip Folder after viewing the video for yourself.}}

== It is uploaded 1/13/09 ==

{{quotebox|and currently being processed. PASSWORD, Sarah's Sonichu & Rosechu FanSite Files, NOW!}}

{{quoteboxred|Alright, just one last thing before we part ways once again.

I will hand you the password to the rar and your site (which are the same) if you just make a video...sigh...it's a long story...

I recently lost both my parents in a car accident. I want you promise me that you will cherish your parents. They are important in your life. And I want you to appreciate it.

I want a short, maybe two minute video, with your parents having them explain why they are so proud of you and your accomplishments.

Despite all of us trolls, your parents have been there every step of the way. They must be proud of you.

Kinda sad now,
Liquid Snake...}}

{{quotebox|I understand, and I will have it done soon.}}

{{quotebox|And I do appreciate my mother and father every day. I offer my condolences and humble apologies for your loss.}}

== 1/15/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|Chris! IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME, BROTHER!

I have just watched your newest video. Hah! You can't denounce that page!

You know every last word of it is true.

FACE IT, YOU HAVE NOTHING! NOTHING!

ENJOY YOUR 4-CENT GARBAGE.

Love,
Liquid Snake }}

{{quotebox|HA! Have you tried YOUR password on the Tripod account yet? IT WILL NO LONGER WORK! }}

== 1/16/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|I just tried it, it worked!

So, you know. Whatevs, dawg.

Love, Liquid Snake}}

== 1/17/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|I am not [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], my true name is [[Clyde Cash]].

The big brother of [[Ryan Cash]].

Do you understand me?}}

{{quotebox|VERY INTERESTING, I will note "Clyde Cash" as your Nickname, among my PRINTED/WRITTEN INFORMATION I HAVE OF YOU when I go to the [[Police]] Department to REPORT YOU.

Hey, DO ME A HUUUUUGGGGGEEEEE FAVOR; Stand in the middle of HEAVIEST TRAFFIC and GET RUN OVER!

I PRAY TO GOD AND JESUS FOR YOUR DEATH, JASON KENDRICK HOWELL; BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, I left a Message; go check for it on your RING.}}

{{quoteboxred|I don't have a cell phone and I'm not Jason Kendrick Howell, I'm Clyde Cash.

What is wrong with you?}}

== The Truth (DO NOT REPLY) 1/27/09 ==

{{quotebox|I did not go to Redmond. I had NO Financial or Emotional Support from my family, local friends, my church's congregation, nor my attorney; they DID NOT BELIEVE that I was talking to the TRUE Shigeru Miyamoto; they refused to help me, because they cared about me. And I could NOT afford the Trip TO Redmond Alone at this time.

It's for the better anyway; consider how WIDE the scheduled appointment was spread throughout the internet, I was able to have a peaceful weekend, with the Trolls in some other world. I've already Informed Sarah about this, but I created a CD-R with my Sonichu Powerpoint Presentation and [[CADD]] Files for the [[Cwcville]] Shopping Mall, and a [[DVD]] with a LIVE reading of the Powerpoint and personal words, and shipped them to Mr. Miyamoto c/o N.O.A. So, basically, IRL in my person, I've been having a peaceful weekend, FREE from Troll and [[Internet]] worries. I had it shipped with Delivery Confirmation, so I KNOW it was delivered successfully on the 23rd.

Unfortunately, while I was hoping that would compensate for my being unable to make the trip, I had learned from N.O.A.'s auto-sender that they do not accept business materials via snail-mail, so the discs were discarded.

I have apologized to N.O.A. and Mr. Miyamoto, and asked him to send me a Hand-Written Document of the business between him and me via snail-mail, for me to present to my family, friends and attorney, so I could make the trip for real in the near future. My attorney would make the appointment.

There was chaos and confusion from the mix of Legitimate e-mails and Troll/Bully/Impostor e-mails, I had to play it safe.

I feel bad about this situation as well, because to Cover for my Family and Local Friends' Care and Concern for my safety and being, considering the possibility of an Impostor who could harm me if I made the trip at this time, I had to Half-Truth around. :(

Christian C.}}

These lead into the Clyde Cash E-mails.

Gregg Mays E-mails

2010-09-24T08:11:32Z

Travis Cwckle: /* I KNOW 1/8/09 */

==Sonichu.Net Redesign for Nintendo Please Reply ASAP 1/6/09==
{{quoteboxred|Hello, Mr. Christian Chandler

I am [[Gregg Mays]], hired by [[Nintendo]] to redesign your website in order to prepare the [[Sonichu]] promotion for [[Animal Crossing]].

This is the design that was approved by the administration over at Nintendo.

I'm planning on updating most of the website tonight. Let me know when is the best time for me to update the site.

Do not worry, I will include a helpful guide on how to update your site with comics and messages after the redesign.

Sincerely,

Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|I see. But please clearify for me; you sent me an image that would have appeared on Nintendo.com; are you updating Nintendo.com or asking to update [[Sonichu.net]]?

Please Clearify, and I will work with you on this.

Peace,
Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quotebox|Also, my Australian [[Sweetheart]], [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie]] is trusted with the information around Sonichu.net, as well as her own created Sub-Domain for Sonichu.net, The Offical Sonichu and Rosechu Fan Site; I advise checking in with her as well on the reconstruction; maybe even inprove her Fan Site. Her e-mail address is pandahalo@gmail.com.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

This is Gregg Mays.

Nintendo would like to host all Sonichu related materials on Sonichu.Net while keeping the Nintendo design. If you do not like the Nintendo design, I can work with Nintendo on updating or revising.

Please get back to me asap, I would like to install some databases to set up the forums by tonight.

Sincerely,

Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|It's cool; I just wanted to get a better understanding of the situation. I will still be able to make my updates to Sonichu.net that I have planned and any future ones as well, correct? If that is the case, I wish some of your recommended HTML code in notepad format, in addition to your guidelines. I appreciate Nintendo's input in the project, and I approve you of your work that you were hired to do. Please also send me the links to all pages related in this.

Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

The update process is done through PHP while the design itself is CSS. There will be a form that will allow you to make news posts as well as add new sections and subsections to the website. This is why I must install a database for your website in order for these new updates to take place. You will no longer have to use HTML, instead simply login to a form to update your website.

Right now, I must first install a database.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Okay. I await your completion, and information on how I can log in and do what I need to do.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

To further clarify the updating scheme, here is a pictoral representation of what my plan is.

I will be using the base coding from Nintendo as an example.

1: Current location of the user.
2: Home page
3: Section
4: Subsection

You will be able to edit the home page (although Nintendo would like to use a promotional Sonichu and Rosechu Animal Crossing front page until its release), edit or add new sections and subsections through a form.

It is a very simple system that I plan to implement and hope to do a test run tonight.

I will need to update your website to add a database and need your help to test the implementation.

I will also need a separate username and password as your official account for the new system.

I have taken it upon myself to convert your entire website into this new format (skeletal, meaning there may be some HTML errors, but easily fixable)

If you wish to make any changes after the test run is complete, feel free to do so.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

Could you please send a response within the next hour so I may begin work. Thank you.

Also, Nintendo has received notice of your AC video on your YouTube account.

They would like for you to make a promotional video including:

Introduce yourself.
Promote and explain Sonichu.
Promote and explain Rosechu.
Promote Animal Crossing: City Folk.

Sincerely,

Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I have done everything I can on my end of the website. I have finished the updating system which you may take a look here. Please supply a username and password for you to demo the system and the details for Sonichu.Net so I can update your site with this system. Thank you.

Sincerely,

Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I assume you are busy and will get back to me with the details ASAP. I was planning on bringing up the forums tonight; however, since I assume you are doing other important duties at the moment, I will let you get back to me tomorrow.

I apologize for springing this on you so fast. I just need to get this work finished.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

==1/7/09==

{{quotebox|Thank you for understanding, Gregg. I had to get [[biological_clock|my daily amount of sleep]], but all is green for you. Please make my username for the new thing, "sonichuchandler", and the password to be "nutmeg"; I'll change it later.

As for the password for the tripod account that hosts the pages of Sonichu.net, I understand your need to update it as well, but I don't wish to disclose the password so easily. I feel it adequate if you check in with my Sweetheart and partner, Sarah, on pandahalo@gmail.com; I have informed her of your cooperation in the project. She is capable of identifying e-mails from people, and she has an excellent "Sixth Sense" (if you will) in emotionally determining the true people from the [[trolls]] she and I had to deal with. She also has the current password to the tripod account behind Sonichu.net; we've agreed on its recent, more complicated change mutually.

I hope this helps you in your work. Thank you very much.

Peace,
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler

I have contacted Sarah and hope to receive a good response so I can work on the website later tonight. I plan to add the beta version of my blog/website updater and the forums, hopefully by tonight if all goes well. For now, I have some other clients I must work with. Please reply in about four hours if all goes well. Thanks.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Mr. Mays, I thank you for getting in touch with Sarah. I have been busy today editing the pages of my previous and recent [[Comic]] Books. Earlier, I did think to check with the Lawer of Nintendo who I have been in good contact with and my associate behind Animal Crossing City Folk to verify you for trust.

I will get back to you with my decision of entrusting you with my Tripod password or not as soon as I hear from either of them, or Sarah.

Peace,
Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler

I'd really like to get working tonight. The lawyer of Nintendo is for Nintendo of Japan, correct? I was hired by Nintendo of America so I don't know about these people. Could you refer them to me so I can get them in touch with my employer?

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|The lawer I'm talking to is James Zylberstein of Nintendo of America.}}

{{quotebox|I've promised the edits and reuploadings of Past Comic Pages, and I am currently uploading the re-edited pages after a whole day of re-editing. So, with all due respect, my own personal routine and the routine-parts of my [[Autism]], I'd like to finish updating the pages and Sonichu.net as I have previously promised James, Mr. [[Miyamoto]] and the rest of Nintendo of [[America]] and Japan, before I entrust it to anyone else's hands.

I thank you for your patience.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I understand, is it possible for you to finish tonight? I have a deadline to meet and I've set aside time for tonight. If not, that's okay, but really, this has been lingering in my mind for quite a long time. Sorry if that causes you trouble.

Sincerely
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I see what you are doing. I will make note to use the new edited version of the pages. I will not tamper with any of the images. I will only create new pages for them. I will do all the coding work. You just need to take care of the images and I'll handle the rest, does that sound good?

Sincerely
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Okay, I understand better now what you'll be doing. I will have the work finished within an hour estimated; I will e-mail you again when I am finished.}}

== 1/8/09 ==

{{quotebox|I apologize again for the delay. I am finished with my promised edits. I will entrust you; the password is 0urD4uGHt3r_[[Crystal|cRySt4L]].

Don't disappoint me, and do what you have planned.

Peace,
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

Alright, I will put up a temporarily index page informing people of the change. Please allow me around two hours to install the new software.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Something has gone wrong. I can not access the site anymore.

Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|I just got work that my job has been suspended for this client (you). Apparently the lawyer has told me that they did not finalize issues with [[Sega]] before realizing the website was initiated. I can not help you with this, I'm just a web designer. You need to speak with your lawyer to explain the [[copyright]] issues to Sega. If this ever gets cleared up, I'll get your website back up as good as new.

Sincerely, Gregg Mays}}

== You've disappointed me, sir. 1/8/09 ==

{{quotebox|Because only YOU, other than Sarah Cassandra McKenzie and myself have the Password for my Tripod account; NO ONE ELSE should have been able to access the account and put the .txt file on there. I'm not pointing fingers here, but you are pretty much the main suspect in the matter.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I did not put the files on there, Tripod must have acted with Sega on this. I do not know anything more of this matter. I'm not much of a legal guy but you have a lawyer right? Just clarify the copyright issue and everything should be fine.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|I do not have an attorney of my own; the only attorney I have been in contact with was Nintendo of America's Attorney, James Zylberstein. And I have informed him of this dilemma.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I'm sorry about this copyright thing, I'm sure it's just a misunderstanding between Nintendo and Sega, I checked your video on the [[YouTube]]. I didn't see a mention of Sega, maybe you should do that. That'll ease tensions. I gotta head back to the wife and kids. Take care, man.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

It seems you have the copyright thing under control. I can restore your site as I made a complete backup if you want. I'll be able to install some forums and get that new form system up tonight.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Yes, I have the Copyright thing under control. PLEASE RESTORE SONICHU.NET back to the way it was, RIGHT NOW! And what did you change the Tripod password to?}]

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I did not change the Tripod password. I will restore it as soon as possible.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Thank you; you have less than two hours.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

I can't seem to access the site anymore. I can't work on it unless I gain access to it.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

Until you sort out these copyright issues, I'm afraid I can't help you. Tell me when you do, you'll be Numero Uno on my priority list.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

== I KNOW 1/8/09 ==

{{quotebox|I KNOW that you are REALLY a Troll, as my Lawer at Nintendo of America has Confirmed for me. SEGA has NO INTENTIONS of Suing me for any infringements, he has also informed me of.

NOW LISTEN, SIR, I WANT YOU TO RESTORE ALL THE FILES YOU'VE DELETED FROM SONICHU.NET, THE SONICHU & ROSECHU FAN SITE, CWC'S POKESITE 2 AND THE OTHER CWC SITES THAT WERE ON THERE, OR I WILL HAVE MY LAWER, HIS PEOPLE OF NINTENDO AND THE PEOPLE OF SEGA, EVEN THE POWER OF MR. MIYAMOTO HIMSELF, BRING IN A TRACKING TEAM, TRACK YOU DOWN, AND FORCE YOU TO RESTORE SONICHU.NET AND ALL, WITH A CRUEL, BEATING-UP, TERRIBLY PAINFUL PUNISHMENT!

YOU DO NOT WANT TO REMAIN ON MY BAD SIDE; MY [[Fangs|FANGS]] ARE SHARP, and I can thirst for blood, even though I am [[Cherokian Clanb|Cherokee]], NOT a [[Vamprosa|vampire]].

Also, that txt file letter you left is a FAKE, I KNOW!

PUT SONICHU.NET AND ALL SITES ALONG WITH IT BACK ONTO THE TRIPOD ACCOUNT, RESET THE E-MAIL BACK TO MINE, OR I WILL BRING DOWN A WRATH OF GOD UPON YOU!}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler,

I do not have the power to change the e-mail or password. If you allow me to access the account, I can restore the entire site back to the way it was before Sega managed to tamper with your site. I can foolproof the site as well.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler,

Please look at this proof of concept I had made earlier.

http://greggmays.tripod.com/what.htm

There must have been miscommunication within Nintendo. They are a large company. I am a hired employer outside of Nintendo for the sole purpose of web design. I have a backup of your site, I can restore if you want.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|I have allowed access for you to get into my Tripod account after I impulsively entrusted you with the password. And at the time, you were able to change the e-mail address associated with it and the password. I am hardly buying your likely stories. But you should talk to my Nintendo Lawer, J.Z. at jzylberstein@lawyer.com. RESTORE SONICHU.NET and ALL FILES AND FOLDERS WITH IT!}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler,

The lawyers should be talking to you soon. Once they do, I will begin work on the website.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Look, thanks to a mistake on Sega's part, I've lost my job and now I can't feed my kids for the next week. I offered to restore the site but you wouldn't let me so the client (you) has been lost and my employer just fired me.

I am crying right now. Thanks.

Gregg Mays}}

== 1/9/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|My employer just allowed me one chance to get my job back, I have to satisfy the client (you) and restore your site. I can't do this without the access code to your website.

Please let me restore it.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|Access Code? I know only of my old password, which I had entrusted into you; I have no idea about an Access Code. If you can tell me how I can find this Access Code, I will inform you of it.}}

{{quoteboxred|I mean password, I do not know the password to the site. The only way I can restore the site is by getting the password to the site. Please let me know of what the new password is.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quotebox|The password should be 0urD4uGHt3r_cRySt4L.}}

{{quoteboxred|It says:
Sorry, but the username and password you provided don't match. Please check them and try again.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear, Mr. Christian Chandler

Please reset the password on your account and give it to me to restore your site.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

== 1/10/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|I cannot restore your website unless I can gain access to the Tripod account. Without it, I am unable to restore your site. I'm sorry.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays

PS, I have lost my only chance to regain my job so I'm doing this out of the goodness of my heart. Please, let me make things right.}}

{{quotebox|I feel for you, and I wish I could help, but I can't do anything about the password problem. And if I could, I would certainly be glad to help you help me and yourself. Please tell your employer that your customer pardons the job, and wishes that you not lose your job over it.

Peace,
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Mr. Christian Chandler

Thank you for your kindness. Right now, I'm on probation but I think it should be good for me. Let me know if you ever get access to your website and I will restore it immediately and then some. I will do the promised upgrade and I will work ever harder than ever. Thank you so much.

Sincerely,
Gregg Mays}}

== It is I, Jason Kendrick Howell! If you ever want to see your beloved site restored, you must meet my demands. 1/12/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|If you ever wish for me to hand over your beloved website, you must announce your [[homos]]exuality to YouTube.

You must not reveal that I told you to do this, otherwise you will never see your site restored!

You must detail how you've been kept in the closet for so long, your search for a sweetheart as a cover up and why Sonichu is so gay.

Toodles, 
[[Metal Gear Solid|Liquid Snake]]}}

{{quoteboxred|You must be angry! Of course, you could always make a video proclaiming how straight you are.

Either choice, gay or straight, which will it be?

Liquid Snake 
"BROTHER"}}

{{quotebox|If I make a video with a proclimation, will you give me the new password you associated my Tripod Account with?}}

{{quoteboxred|Of course, I may be an evil troll, but I never go back on my word. I have principles.

Love, Liquid Snake}}

{{quotebox|Very well; I will have the short video up soon.}}

{{quotebox|It is being processed; and it has been fully uploaded. Now please send me the password, and ALL of the files for Sarah's Sonichu & Rosechu Fan Site in a Compressed Zip Folderin your reply.}}

{{quoteboxred|SEVEN SECONDS!??! I am disappointed in you.

This is not a fair deal! I expected a 20 minute explanation of why you are straight and not gay.

I still think you are the biggest homosexual in the world so do many others, just look at your Youtube comments. You're doing yourself a favor if you make a REAL video.

Love, Liquid Snake}}

{{quotebox|Fine, if you want a full 5-10 minute explination, I'll redo the video.}}

{{quoteboxred|The longer it is, the better your fans will believe it. Look at those comments, my god, they are ruthless!

Love, Liquid Snake}}

{{quotebox|The video is being uploaded; it is about ten minutes long. Please Send me the Password and ALL of Sarah's Sonichu & Rosechu Fansite Files in a Compressed Zip Folder after viewing the video for yourself.}}

== It is uploaded 1/13/09 ==

{{quotebox|and currently being processed. PASSWORD, Sarah's Sonichu & Rosechu FanSite Files, NOW!}}

{{quoteboxred|Alright, just one last thing before we part ways once again.

I will hand you the password to the rar and your site (which are the same) if you just make a video...sigh...it's a long story...

I recently lost both my parents in a car accident. I want you promise me that you will cherish your parents. They are important in your life. And I want you to appreciate it.

I want a short, maybe two minute video, with your parents having them explain why they are so proud of you and your accomplishments.

Despite all of us trolls, your parents have been there every step of the way. They must be proud of you.

Kinda sad now,
Liquid Snake...}}

{{quotebox|I understand, and I will have it done soon.}}

{{quotebox|And I do appreciate my mother and father every day. I offer my condolences and humble apologies for your loss.}}

== 1/15/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|Chris! IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME, BROTHER!

I have just watched your newest video. Hah! You can't denounce that page!

You know every last word of it is true.

FACE IT, YOU HAVE NOTHING! NOTHING!

ENJOY YOUR 4-CENT GARBAGE.

Love,
Liquid Snake }}

{{quotebox|HA! Have you tried YOUR password on the Tripod account yet? IT WILL NO LONGER WORK! }}

== 1/16/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|I just tried it, it worked!

So, you know. Whatevs, dawg.

Love, Liquid Snake}}

== 1/17/09 ==

{{quoteboxred|I am not [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], my true name is [[Clyde Cash]].

The big brother of [[Ryan Cash]].

Do you understand me?}}

{{quotebox|VERY INTERESTING, I will note "Clyde Cash" as your Nickname, among my PRINTED/WRITTEN INFORMATION I HAVE OF YOU when I go to the [[Police]] Department to REPORT YOU.

Hey, DO ME A HUUUUUGGGGGEEEEE FAVOR; Stand in the middle of HEAVIEST TRAFFIC and GET RUN OVER!

I PRAY TO GOD AND JESUS FOR YOUR DEATH, JASON KENDRICK HOWELL; BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, I left a Message; go check for it on your RING.}}

{{quoteboxred|I don't have a cell phone and I'm not Jason Kendrick Howell, I'm Clyde Cash.

What is wrong with you?}}

== The Truth (DO NOT REPLY) 1/27/09 ==

{{quotebox|I did not go to Redmond. I had NO Financial or Emotional Support from my family, local friends, my church's congregation, nor my attorney; they DID NOT BELIEVE that I was talking to the TRUE Shigeru Miyamoto; they refused to help me, because they cared about me. And I could NOT afford the Trip TO Redmond Alone at this time.

It's for the better anyway; consider how WIDE the scheduled appointment was spread throughout the internet, I was able to have a peaceful weekend, with the Trolls in some other world. I've already Informed Sarah about this, but I created a CD-R with my Sonichu Powerpoint Presentation and [[CADD]] Files for the [[Cwcville]] Shopping Mall, and a [[DVD]] with a LIVE reading of the Powerpoint and personal words, and shipped them to Mr. Miyamoto c/o N.O.A. So, basically, IRL in my person, I've been having a peaceful weekend, FREE from Troll and [[Internet]] worries. I had it shipped with Delivery Confirmation, so I KNOW it was delivered successfully on the 23rd.

Unfortunately, while I was hoping that would compensate for my being unable to make the trip, I had learned from N.O.A.'s auto-sender that they do not accept business materials via snail-mail, so the discs were discarded.

I have apologized to N.O.A. and Mr. Miyamoto, and asked him to send me a Hand-Written Document of the business between him and me via snail-mail, for me to present to my family, friends and attorney, so I could make the trip for real in the near future. My attorney would make the appointment.

There was chaos and confusion from the mix of Legitimate e-mails and Troll/Bully/Impostor e-mails, I had to play it safe.

I feel bad about this situation as well, because to Cover for my Family and Local Friends' Care and Concern for my safety and being, considering the possibility of an Impostor who could harm me if I made the trip at this time, I had to Half-Truth around. :(

Christian C.}}

These lead into the Clyde Cash E-mails.

Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-18T05:08:24Z

Travis Cwckle:

[[File:128469211411.jpg|thumb|The greatest show on earth]]

'''Song for Jackie.MOV ''' is a video uploaded by [[Chris]] to [[YouTube]] 16 [[September 2010]]. In another attempt to impress [[Jackie]], Chris dons a turban and paints his face in black and red to resemble [http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Mr._Popo Mr. Popo] from ''[[Dragon Ball Z|Dragon Ball]]'' and [[Chris and Music|"sings"]] his version of [[Wikipedia:Mmm_Mmm_Mmm_Mmm|"Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm"]] by [[Wikipedia:Crash_Test_Dummies|Crash Test Dummies]].

It is also worth noting that the original song's lyrics (which tell of two children who carry deformities, but glad they are not in a "[[Autism|Holy Roller]]"-style church like the third child of the song) denote either Chris's inability of getting the message of (even [[Kacey|blatant]] and [[BlueSpike|thinly veiled]]) [[Family_guy#Influence_on_Chris|satire]], his desperation in his [[Love Quest]], or both. Instead, he [[Asperger syndrome|uses the limelight]] [[Chris and his ego|for himself]], while also implying that Jackie too has some deformity that is forgivable by the Nietzschean (or Nietzsch-Chan) superman that is Chris.

Note that "sings" is in quotes because Chris's grating mumblings make even his earlier [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|ill-fated music career]] sound like the work of a classically-trained soprano by comparison. Likely unaware of the similarity of his makeup to [[Niggos|blackface]], he rounds out the performance with an impromptu [[Wikipedia:Minstrel show|minstrel song]] adapted from the Spike Lee movie ''[[Wikipedia:Bamboozled|Bamboozled]]'', his [[muscle bra|masculine bosoms]] flailing wildly with each gyration.

Showing his usual amount of [[Fail|knowledge]] regarding other [[Chris and Religion|religions]], Chris makes reference to Hinduism despite the fact that genies (or djinni) are an Islamic concept. As if racially insensitive behaviour is not enough, Chris manages to add some religious ignorance to the mix, achieving precisely the opposite of what he intended by informing any Hindus and black people who may be watching that he meant no offense.

At this point, Jackie's reaction is unknown.
[[File:LAZACWC.jpg|right]]
==Video==

{{quotebox|Attention, I am portraying the Dragonball Character, Mr. Popo.

I am not, [[:File:SchuComic9Page19-C.jpg|nor would ever]], making fun of any [[black people]] living, [[Chris and Death|dead]] or fiction. Nor am I making fun of the Hindu people. Both of which, Blacks and Hindus, are good people too.

Again, this video presentation [[lie|is NOT meant to make fun of the Blacks or the Hindus.]] It is only a video for my girlfriend to cosplay as Mr. Popo from the Dragonball Television Series.}}

{{Infobox/video
| name = Song For Jackie
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TzAJvMKQeJA}}
| stardate = 16 [[September 2010]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}, {{Racism|text}}, {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{DenimJacket|text}}
| previous = [[XBox is OK.MOV]]
| next = Current
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Leadbelly.jpg|thumb|Leadbelly's reaction to this video.]]
[[File:PopoWTF.jpg|thumb|Mr. Popo is not amused.]]

[''fake sounding accent''] 'Ello. I am [[Pedo-glasses|glasses]] wearing genie, [[Dragon Ball Z|Mr. Popo]]. [''nods and folds his arms, then turns on audio''] I tell you a story. It is a good story. You will enjoy story.

[''starts "singing" ''] Once there was this boy [''flashes manboobs''] who was born with some autism and yet made a few friends, but after his [[high school]] years he...[[ShecameforCWC.JPG|lost]]...his friends and was [[Stress|troll tortured]]. By [[Trolls|bullies]] who were [[Chris and his Ego|jealous of his material things]] [wiggles his head from side to side and waggles his finger] Nonononononono. [''hums'']

Once there was this girl who continued to have friends long after high school. She could have had her pick of men. Then she found the wayward lost boy. They matched up very well, [[:File: SchuComic10P09.jpg|heavenly matched]]...
Loooove, he was so[?]...

And both [''starts to say 'boy', turns it into 'girl'''] [[Gay|boirl]] and boy were glad when they both saw each other's eyes. When they met up! They both thought of each other. Very often! They had enjoyed each other's company sweetly. Oh, roller coaster ecstasy. In fantasy, their days were simple and they looked to be married and have their own [[Reginald Chandler|boy]]. And [[Crystal|girl]]. It's true! Wait for [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|marriage invitations]]!

[''Suddenly animated, imitating fiddle player''] And there ain't no Saiyans on de [[Gitar of Fail|fiddle]], no Saiyans on de fiddle like this! Ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this!

[''begins to dance what is most likely a continuation of whatever Minstrel Song he saw; a mockery of African aboriginal dancing'']
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!

And there ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this! Ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this!

Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!

[''spoken''] Happy [[hanky-panky|loving]]! Between me and Jackie! I love you sweetheart. Boing!

==See also==
* [[For My Sweetest Ivy]]
* [[A CWC Audition]]
* [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|For J-R's Eyes Only]]
{{clear}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[XBox is OK.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}
{{Music Videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-18T05:07:45Z

Travis Cwckle:

[[File:128469211411.jpg|thumb|The greatest show on earth]]

'''Song for Jackie.MOV ''' is a video uploaded by [[Chris]] to [[YouTube]] 16 [[September 2010]]. In another attempt to impress [[Jackie]], Chris dons a turban and paints his face in black and red to resemble [http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Mr._Popo Mr. Popo] from ''[[Dragon Ball Z|Dragon Ball]]'' and [[Chris and Music|"sings"]] his version of [[Wikipedia:Mmm_Mmm_Mmm_Mmm|"Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm"]] by [[Wikipedia:Crash_Test_Dummies|Crash Test Dummies]].

It is also worth noting that the original song's lyrics (which tell of two children who carry deformities, but glad they are not in a "[[Autism|Holy Roller]]"-style church like the third child of the song) denote either Chris's inability of getting the message of (even [[Kacey|blatant]] and [[BlueSpike|thinly veiled]]) [[Family_guy#Influence_on_Chris|satire]], his desperation in his [[Love Quest]], or both. Instead, he [[Asperger syndrome|uses the limelight]] [[Chris and his ego|for himself]], while also implying that Jackie too has some deformity that is forgivable by the Nietzschean (or Nietzsch-Chan) superman that is Chris.

Note that "sings" is in quotes because Chris's grating mumblings make even his earlier [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|ill-fated music career]] sound like the work of a classically-trained soprano by comparison. Likely unaware of the similarity of his makeup to [[Niggos|blackface]], he rounds out the performance with an impromptu [[Wikipedia:Minstrel show|minstrel song]] adapted from the Spike Lee movie ''[[Wikipedia:Bamboozled|Bamboozled]]'', his [[muscle bra|masculine bosoms]] flailing wildly with each gyration.

Showing his usual amount of [[Fail|knowledge]] regarding other [[Chris and Religion|religions]], Chris makes reference to Hinduism despite the fact that genies (or [i]djinni[/i]) are an Islamic concept. As if racially insensitive behaviour is not enough, Chris manages to add some religious ignorance to the mix, achieving precisely the opposite of what he intended by informing any Hindus and black people who may be watching that he meant no offense.

At this point, Jackie's reaction is unknown.
[[File:LAZACWC.jpg|right]]
==Video==

{{quotebox|Attention, I am portraying the Dragonball Character, Mr. Popo.

I am not, [[:File:SchuComic9Page19-C.jpg|nor would ever]], making fun of any [[black people]] living, [[Chris and Death|dead]] or fiction. Nor am I making fun of the Hindu people. Both of which, Blacks and Hindus, are good people too.

Again, this video presentation [[lie|is NOT meant to make fun of the Blacks or the Hindus.]] It is only a video for my girlfriend to cosplay as Mr. Popo from the Dragonball Television Series.}}

{{Infobox/video
| name = Song For Jackie
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TzAJvMKQeJA}}
| stardate = 16 [[September 2010]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}, {{Racism|text}}, {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{DenimJacket|text}}
| previous = [[XBox is OK.MOV]]
| next = Current
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Leadbelly.jpg|thumb|Leadbelly's reaction to this video.]]
[[File:PopoWTF.jpg|thumb|Mr. Popo is not amused.]]

[''fake sounding accent''] 'Ello. I am [[Pedo-glasses|glasses]] wearing genie, [[Dragon Ball Z|Mr. Popo]]. [''nods and folds his arms, then turns on audio''] I tell you a story. It is a good story. You will enjoy story.

[''starts "singing" ''] Once there was this boy [''flashes manboobs''] who was born with some autism and yet made a few friends, but after his [[high school]] years he...[[ShecameforCWC.JPG|lost]]...his friends and was [[Stress|troll tortured]]. By [[Trolls|bullies]] who were [[Chris and his Ego|jealous of his material things]] [wiggles his head from side to side and waggles his finger] Nonononononono. [''hums'']

Once there was this girl who continued to have friends long after high school. She could have had her pick of men. Then she found the wayward lost boy. They matched up very well, [[:File: SchuComic10P09.jpg|heavenly matched]]...
Loooove, he was so[?]...

And both [''starts to say 'boy', turns it into 'girl'''] [[Gay|boirl]] and boy were glad when they both saw each other's eyes. When they met up! They both thought of each other. Very often! They had enjoyed each other's company sweetly. Oh, roller coaster ecstasy. In fantasy, their days were simple and they looked to be married and have their own [[Reginald Chandler|boy]]. And [[Crystal|girl]]. It's true! Wait for [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|marriage invitations]]!

[''Suddenly animated, imitating fiddle player''] And there ain't no Saiyans on de [[Gitar of Fail|fiddle]], no Saiyans on de fiddle like this! Ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this!

[''begins to dance what is most likely a continuation of whatever Minstrel Song he saw; a mockery of African aboriginal dancing'']
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!

And there ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this! Ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this!

Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!

[''spoken''] Happy [[hanky-panky|loving]]! Between me and Jackie! I love you sweetheart. Boing!

==See also==
* [[For My Sweetest Ivy]]
* [[A CWC Audition]]
* [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|For J-R's Eyes Only]]
{{clear}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[XBox is OK.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}
{{Music Videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-17T08:57:39Z

Travis Cwckle:

[[File:128469211411.jpg|thumb|The greatest show on earth]]

'''Song for Jackie.MOV ''' is a video uploaded by [[Chris]] to [[YouTube]] 16 [[September 2010]]. In another attempt to impress [[Jackie]], Chris dons a turban and paints his face in black and red to resemble [http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Mr._Popo Mr. Popo] from ''[[Dragon Ball Z|Dragon Ball]]'' and [[Chris and Music|"sings"]] his version of [[Wikipedia:Mmm_Mmm_Mmm_Mmm|"Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm"]] by [[Wikipedia:Crash_Test_Dummies|Crash Test Dummies]].

It is also worth noting that the original song's lyrics (which tell of two children who carry deformities, but glad they are not in a "[[Autism|Holy Roller]]"-style church like the third child of the song) denote either Chris's inability of getting the message of (even [[Kacey|blatant]] and [[BlueSpike|thinley vieled]]) [[Family_guy#Influence_on_Chris|satire]], his desparation in his [[Love Quest]], or both. Instead, he [[Asperger syndrome|uses the limelight for himself]], while also implying that Jackie too has some deformity that is forgiviable by the Nietzschen superman that is Chris.

Note that "sings" is in quotes because Chris's grating mumblings make even his earlier [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|ill-fated music career]] sound like the work of a classically-trained soprano by comparison. Likely unaware of the similarity of his makeup to [[Niggos|blackface]], he rounds out the performance with an impromptu [[Wikipedia:Minstrel show|minstrel song]] adapted from the Spike Lee movie ''Bamboozled'', his [[muscle bra|masculine bosoms]] flailing wildly with each gyration.

At this point, Jackie's reaction is unknown.

==Video==

{{quotebox|Attention, I am portraying the Dragonball Character, Mr. Popo.

I am not, [[:File:SchuComic9Page19-C.jpg|nor would ever]], making fun of any [[black people]] living, dead or fiction. Nor am I making fun of the Hindu people. Both of which, Blacks and Hindus, are good people too.

Again, this video presentation is NOT meant to make fun of the Blacks or the Hindus. It is only a video for my girlfriend to cosplay as Mr. Popo from the Dragonball Television Series.}}

{{Infobox/video
| name = Song For Jackie
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TzAJvMKQeJA}}
| stardate = 16 [[September 2010]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}, {{Racism|text}}, {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{DenimJacket|text}}
| previous = [[XBox is OK.MOV]]
| next = Current
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Leadbelly.jpg|thumb|Leadbelly's reaction to this video.]]
[[File:PopoWTF.jpg|thumb|Mr. Popo is not amused.]]

'Ello. I am [[Pedo-glasses|glasses]] wearing genie, [[Dragon Ball Z|Mr. Popo]]. [''nods and folds his arms, then turns on audio''] I tell you a story. It is a good story. You will enjoy story.

[''starts "singing" ''] Once there was this boy [''flashes manboobs''] who was born with some autism and yet made a few friends, but after his [[high school]] years he...[[ShecameforCWC.JPG|lost]]...his friends and was [[Stress|troll tortured]]. By [[Trolls|bullies]] who were [[Chris and his Ego|jealous of his material things]] [wiggles his head from side to side and waggles his finger] Nonononononono. [''hums'']

Once there was this girl who continued to have friends long after high school. She could have had her pick of men. Then she found the wayward lost boy. They matched up very well, [[:File: SchuComic10P09.jpg|heavenly matched]]...
Loooove, he was so[?]...

And both [''starts to say 'boy', turns it into 'girl'''] [[Gay|boirl]] and boy were glad when they both saw each other's eyes. When they met up! They both thought of each other. Very often! They had enjoyed each other's company sweetly. Oh, roller coaster ecstasy. In fantasy, their days were simple and they looked to be married and have their own [[Reginald Chandler|boy]]. And [[Crystal|girl]]. It's true! Wait for [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|marriage invitations]]!

[''Suddenly animated, imitating fiddle player''] And there ain't no Saiyans on de [[Gitar of Fail|fiddle]], no Saiyans on de fiddle like this! Ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this!

[''begins to dance what is most likely a continuation of whatever Minstrel Song he saw; a mockery of African aboriginal dancing'']
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!

And there ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this! Ain't no Saiyans on de fiddle, no Saiyans on de fiddle like this!

Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!

[''spoken''] Happy [[hanky-panky|loving]]! Between me and Jackie! I love you sweetheart. Boing!}

==See also==
* [[For My Sweetest Ivy]]
* [[A CWC Audition]]
* [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|For J-R's Eyes Only]]
{{clear}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[XBox is OK.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}
{{Music Videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-17T04:10:25Z

Travis Cwckle:

[[Image:Niggachris.jpg|thumb|120px|What Chris would look like if he actually had a black face.]]
'''Song for Jackie.MOV ''' is a video uploaded 16 September 2010. In another failureiffic attempt to impress [[Jackie]], Chris dons a turban and paints his face in black and red to resemble [http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Mr._Popo Mr. Popo] from ''[[Dragon Ball Z|Dragon Ball]]'' and [[Chris and Music|"sings"]] his version of [[Wikipedia:Mmm_Mmm_Mmm_Mmm|"Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm"]] by [[Wikipedia:Crash_Test_Dummies|Crash Test Dummies]].

Note that "sings" is in quotes because Chris's grating mumblings make even his earlier [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|ill-fated music career]] sound like the work of a classically-trained soprano by comparison. Likely unaware of the similarity of his makeup to [[Niggos|blackface]], he rounds out the performance with an impromptu [[Wikipedia:Minstrel show|minstrel song]] adapted from the Spike Lee movie ''Bamboozled'', his [[muscle bra|masculine bosoms]] flailing wildly with each gyration. At this point, Jackie's reaction is unknown...
==Video==
{{quotebox|
**Attention, I am portraying the Dragonball Character, Mr. Popo.

I am not, nor would ever, making fun of any black people living, dead or fiction. Nor am I making fun of the Hindu people. Both of which, Blacks and Hindus, are good people too.

Again, this video presentation is NOT meant to make fun of the Blacks or the Hindus. It is only a video for my girlfriend to cosplay as Mr. Popo from the Dragonball Television Series.}}

{{Infobox/video
| name = Song For Jackie
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TzAJvMKQeJA}}
| stardate = 16 [[September 2010]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}, {{Racism|text}}, {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{DenimJacket|text}}
| previous = [[XBox is OK.MOV]]
| next = Current
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:Leadbelly.jpg|thumb|Leadbelly's reaction to this video.]]
[[File:PopoWTF.jpg|thumb|Mr. Popo is not amused.]]

'Ello. I am [[Pedo-glasses|glasses]] wearing genie, [[Dragon Ball Z|Mr. Popo]]. [nods and folds his arms, then turns on audio.] I tell you a story. It is a good story. You will enjoy story.

[''starts "singing" ''] Once there was this boy [''flashes manboobs''] who was born with some autism and yet made a few friends, but after his [[high school]] years he...[[ShecameforCWC.JPG|lost]]...his friends and was [[Stress|troll tortured]]. By [[Trolls|bullies]] who were [[Chris and his Ego|jealous of his material things]] [wiggles his head from side to side and waggles his finger] Nonononononono. [''hums'']

Once there was this girl who continued to have friends long after high school. She could have had her pick of men. Then she found the wayward lost boy. They matched up very well, [[:File: SchuComic10P09.jpg|heavenly matched]]...
Loooove, he was so[?]...

And both [''starts to say 'boy', turns it into 'girl'''] [[Gay|boirl]] and boy were glad when they both saw each other's eyes. When they met up! They both thought of each other. Very often! They had enjoyed each other's company sweetly. Oh, roller coaster ecstasy. In fantasy, their days were simple and they looked to be married and have their own [[Reginald Chandler|boy]]. And [[Crystal|girl]]. It's true! Wait for [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|marriage invitations]]!

[''Suddenly animated, imitating fiddle player''] And there ain't no saiyans on de fiddle, no saiyans on de fiddle like this! Ain't no saiyans on de fiddle, no saiyans on de fiddle like this!

[''begins to dance what is most likely a continuation of whatever Minstrel Song he saw; a mockery of African aboriginal dancing'']
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!

And there ain't no saiyans on de fiddle, no saiyans on de fiddle like this! Ain't no saiyans on de fiddle, no saiyans on de fiddle like this!

Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!
Asanyoheywahwah hohoheyahoh!

[''spoken''] Happy [[hanky-panky|loving]]! Between me and Jackie! I love you sweetheart. Boing!

{{clear}}

==See Also==
* [[For My Sweetest Ivy]]
* [[A CWC Audition]]
* [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[XBox is OK.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}
{{Music Videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

XBox is OK.MOV

2010-09-14T07:28:38Z

Travis Cwckle:

{{quote|I have no...I have no hate... I have little... [[Chris and anger|I have no hatred or anger]] towards the [[Homos|gay men]]. None at all. No questions, straight forward. I'm cool with...I'm cool with you gays, you know?|Chris [[List of Chris's lies|lying]] to impress [[china]]}}

'''XBox is OK.MOV''' is the second of two videos [[Chris]] uploaded on 13 [[September 2010]]. In it, Chris makes various declarations including a recanting of his [[Hex Box|Xbox]] hatred, stating that he has nothing against the [[homos|gay men]], and removing any [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curses]] he placed. Chris appears to be trying to clear his name, perhaps to demonstrate to a certain [[Jackie|sweetheart]] that he has changed his ways.

It is unclear why Chris has had a change of heart over the Xbox. Having shown his first [[PS3]] no love by [[The MovingForward videos|destroying it]], it only took Chris a matter of days to purchase a new one. This new PS3 appears in the video, and is used in the first video Chris uploaded earlier the same day. Chris apparently has also bought an Xbox.

== Video ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = XBox is OK.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|hVHNdHEz0hM}}
| stardate = 13 September 2010
| style = {{smug|text}}, {{reason|text}}
| subject = {{Rumors|text}}, {{Homos|text}}, {{Video games|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV]]
| next = Current
}}

== Transcript ==

[[Captain's Log]]. Stardate September 13, 2010.

I am making this video to make a public statement.

I no longer have any angst or hatred or anything, any beef, against the Xbox. [''Indicates his shelves. The Xbox is on the third shelf down and towards the middle, hidden amongst the junk''] It is a good console, a very good console, prob-a about equally good as a PS3, cannot play BluRay, but! It is still a good console and is just another gaming console. Just like...you know, I guess, PS...a PS3 is another gaming console, another [[Wii]], or a Wii is another gaming console.

[''Turns to his TV''] And you notice that there's a depreciation in the number of gaming consoles in the center [''gestures at the TV; a [[LBP|Sackboy]] is visibly idling on the screen''] because, the gaming addiction is gooone! I... [''loses train of thought momentarily''] I have gotten rid of the hoarded systems - [[List of Chris's games|systems and games]] that have been, I have hoarded for a number of years.

And also, I would like to make another statement. [''Looks away from the camera''] I have no...I have no hate... I have little... I have [[Chris and anger|no hatred or anger]] towards the gay men. [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|None at all.]] No questions, straight forward. [''Chris looks visibly insincere''] I'm cool with...[[It's UGH!|I'm cool with you gays]], you know? You go do what you want to do, just you know, [[Honest Content|keep it to yourselves]]. That's all. We're all equal people. We have every right to live our lives free however...each, however each of us individually chooses. So there.

[''pauses and shifts positioning'']

[''mumbles''] Uh, let's see that was another thing...another thing. Hmm.

Anyway that's, uh, that's essentially it. Oh yes I just remembered the other thing. [''Holds up a hand in forgiveness blessing fashion''] I remove ALL [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|hexes and curses]] to every single person I have ever...around the world that I have ever left a curse on. So consider yourselves [''wave of his arm''] cleansed! You're all forgiven. Every last one of you. [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction|Forgiveness!]]

And with that I bid you a good day and a safe one too, all of you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[To Jackie, with Love.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}

{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Haters Gonna Hate.MOV

2010-09-07T06:55:16Z

Travis Cwckle:

'''Haters Gonna Hate''' is a video released on 6 [[September 2010]]. In it, a smug [[Chris]] dismisses the various rumors about his death, and announces that he's going to distance himself from the [[trolls]] and the [[Internet]] ([[Chris_and_the_internet#Attempts_to_leave_the_Internet|again]]).

This video marks the return of the [[Medallions of Fail|Sonichu medallion]] after being missing for half the year, and Chris prominently displays his [[Amnyfest Ring|high school ring]] in classic fashion at the opening of the video. Also, following the [[PS3]] destruction videos, it's possible to see a PS3 on the top shelf, next to the [[television]]. It may be a new one, but it's also possible that Chris kept the case of the old one as a memento. If it is the old one, it once again forms part of [[List of Chris's Lies|Chris's inability to tell the truth]], since he said he would be [[ItIsFinished.MOV|disposing of it in a dumpster]].

== Video ==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Haters gonna hate.mov
| video = {{#ev:youtube|N3KX-1o2WRU}}
| stardate = 6 September 2010
| style = {{smug|text}}
| subject = {{Rumors|text}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| shirt = {{PlainOrangeShirt|text}}
| previous = [[ItIsFinished.MOV]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===

[[image:PS3Alive.png|thumb|''I feel fantastic, and I'm still alive.'']]

''*[[sigh]]*'' September... ''[counting under his breath]'' 4..5...[[Speech impediment|''sits'']]! Two thousand ten.

I am ''not'' [[dead]]. ''[dramatic [[glasses]] removal]'' I am very much alive, [[Chris and health|healthy and well]]! And I aims to keep it that way, so don't believe any god damn rumors from the dang trolls, 'cause you know they alls gonna be falsified. ''[pause]'' And I'll tell ya'll something else - [[Patti Chandler|Patti]] ain't dug up! She's still underground! All them trolls are doing between their forum and what they lie- what they spread about and their dang rumors, is just blowin a bunch of [[Tobacky|''smoke'']]. ''[pause]'' So, what do you ''[mumbles]'' so do you- should you believe a whole bunch of smoke? No. Because all there is with the smoke is just a bunch of ''[mumbles]'' it's just a fire of web [[lies]].

''[Long pause]''

So there. ''[Pause]'' And also, I am going to ignore the trolls and they are not going to bother me anymore. I am regaining control of my life. They have played with me tur-lo- for long enough and they're not gonna play with me anymore; I'm not going to let them. And also I will say another thing. ''[Starts digging into his pocket, fishing out some sort of string]'' Haters. ''[Twirls string]'' Are gonna. Hate. Pew! ''[Throws it, turns off camera]'' {{clear}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ItIsFinished.MOV]]|nextlink=Current}}

{{Captain's Log}}

Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails

2010-09-04T11:30:16Z

Travis Cwckle:

In the late summer of [[2010]], [[Clyde Cash]] and other [[trolls]] offered a series of bounties for various achievements in trolling [[Chris]]. One of the rewards: US$9,001 (GB£5,846 / €7,022 / Can$9,481 / ¥759,589) for the destruction via blunt force trauma of Chris's [[PS3]].

Chris discovered the announcement and apparently decided that he himself could pick up a piece of the action. The following communications reveal that it wasn't actually that simple. They also provide valuable background and context to the [[The MovingFoward videos|MovingFoward videos]] and Chris's filmed visit to [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]] on 31 August.

The e-mails reveal that Chris is [[Chloe|once again claiming]] to have a girlfriend.

Chris's communications are on a blue background, while Clyde and Surfshack Tito's are on a red background.

==The E-mails==
{{quotebox|Hello, Clyde
Sat, Aug 28, 2010 at 2:28 PM

Let's Talk Business. As you are aware, I, myself am aware of the (REDACTED), and recently, I have [[Stardate, August 27, 2010|mistakenly formatted my PS3 Hard Drive]].

I do have a [[gal-pal|Girlfriend]] now; I will not disclose her name, and she is aware of these factors as well. She has encouraged me to work for your Reward Offer. So, with the full intention of moving forward in life, I have destroyed my PS3 personally and video recorded it. I am not going to put it onto [[YouTube]], Yet. I will be sending you the link to the video file I will be uploading to a Mega Upload site right after I finish typing this message.

At the moment, even if you upload the video yourself, it can be considered YOUR Word Alone, possible Movie Editing and Actors, and NOT Fact. However, I am most willing and able to upload the video onto my own YouTube account personally. All I ask for me to actually Upload the Video onto my YouTube is the Full Reward, as posted on (REDACTED), of $9001 in [[Clyde Cash|Cash]]; NO check, NO Digital Transfer; Send me ALL of the Cash in a big, bubble-wrapped envelope via Snail-Mail. You have my good word that I will upload this same video onto my own YouTube right after I get the Cash.

Also, should you upload the video before I get the [[money]], I can and will create a Retractionary Statement to the video, AND blow things out of proportion.

Considering the previous trusted conversation between me and Sarah was provided with your full authorization, I will thank you for that Peace of Mind event by Trusting You in Like. I would like to see the cash in my mailbox, followed by in my hands, within' this week, before September 4, 2010.

Attached are three photos of the same PS3, Post-Damage for your preview.

You, Sarah and Penny all have a good and safe day.

Sincerely,
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quotebox|Another thing
Sat, Aug 28, 2010 at 6:17 PM

Later on, I've realized I could take it a step up, even though the Forum said "With a Brick", and I have finished the job with the rear tire of my car. You send me the Cash of $9001, and I will upload that video with the first one. One Week from Today.

Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|I don't care if this goes up on YouTube or not, these videos are proof to me that you actually are redeemable. I'm surprised, but I'm still skeptical that it's finally destroyed. PS3s are surprisingly tough unlike the fragile POS PS2 and you aren't the strongest fish in the sea.

Once I can clearly see the innards of the PS3 being wrecked or it's in pieces, then we'll talk.

Penny just said hi. Adorable. Let's pretend that was for you, alright?

- Clyde}}

{{quotebox|Fair Enough
Sat, Aug 28, 2010 at 8:57 PM

I have another video of its Final Destruction as well, but I will give you a preview with the attached Photos. Price of Admission for the Videos: the Reward of $9001 in Cash via Snail-Mail, as I have previously described.

Note even the Slightest [[Duck|Bent]] Creases.

Cheers,
Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|I'm skeptical of you now. Why do you seem so willing to destroy your PS3? It used to mean everything to you. I have a strong feeling you're just trying to make me look like a fool. I don't believe any of this. I bet you just found a broken PS3 and passed it off as yours.

- Clyde}}

{{quotebox|Sun, Aug 29, 2010 at 2:00 AM

I understand your skepticism, but I assure you, I destroyed my ONE 500GB, PS2 Backwards, Memory Card Slotted, 4 USB, Wi-Fied Playstation 3 I bought back on March 17, 2007.

I have also made further sacrifices beforehand; I SOLD ALL of my Super [[Nintendo]] Games, and the Console, the Super Scope 6, the SNES Mouse, and Most of my NES Games to Snooky's Pawn Shop Earlier this month; call them up and ask for yourself. And I gave my NES back to [[Bob|my father]] for his enjoyment of Zelda 2, Castlequest and the few remaining NES games. I've traded in a NUMBER of my current console games as well. I cancelled my GameFly Account. I also sold a BUNCH of my CDs, [[DVD]]s and Blu-Ray videos.

Also, I have Very Few Friends locally; I have NEVER dug through any dumpster or Garbage Can; and I could not and did not buy another PS3 anywhere.

With the $9001 I have earned with my deed of Cleansing, I swear on the graves of my [[Aunt Corina]] Weston Inge, my dog, [[Patti]], all of my relatives and past friends, ceased and living, hand on My [[Chris and religion|Holy New International Version Bible]] right now, and on my own life, that I will absolve my debts with my father with half of it, and all of the rest will be used for the Bright Future ahead between me and my [[Sweetheart]]. And I swear, Hand still on the Bible, everything I have done yesterday, as I have told you are ALL True, and That PS3 which is Destroyed now was The One that was Mine Alone and no one else.

I have the Video Footage, and I have given you the Samplings from the Deed; I need not prove myself further. The Destruction was as real as [[Chris humps his PS3|the tiresome humping with the tainted machine]] in that old video I was blackmailed into doing and record.

I have endured the Pains of Loss, and the Healing of Cleansing; FREE of the Lonely and Anguished Soul that went into that machine the past three years from destroying that vessel.

You have One Week to send the Legal, Unmarked $9001 Cash. And I do not think you want to be labeled a Man of No Word after the money you sent to the girl on the Forum. And I KNOW you want the Video Footage. You NEED the Video Footage.

Peace,

Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Chris, it sounds to me you're lying with all this idiotic justification. Either you send me these so-called videos or you're a bullshit [[lies|liar]] and this is over. You've lied way too many goddamn times in the past.

- Clyde}}

{{quotebox|Fine!
Sun, Aug 29, 2010 at 10:02 AM

But I'd better see that Legal, Unmark, Non-consecutive $9001 CASH Within This Week, or the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]] will still be on your head. NO Further Questions or Concerns!

The files in one Zip Folder are being uploaded now, and you will receive the link shortly.

Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Alright, talk to my main-man [[Tito]] at (REDACTED). He deals with all the money transactions since that dealing with that crap is far beneath me. Have fun with your new life!

- Clyde}}

{{quoteboxred|ALOHA LITTLE CUZ!

It's been like what, a few months after that whole [[The Wallflower|Heather]] Incident? I knew you blocked me so I had to create this new email to talk about the $9,001 reward.

Anyways, I've received orders from Clyde to hand over the money to you.

Atleast I would have if you read the fine print in my thread.

If you go to my thread and look really close, brudda, you would have noticed that there were some qualifications for being eligible for the reward.

Since you're probably too busy with other things, I will recite the fine print.

this little tiny line right under here was the qualification, and you missed it thinking it looked like my "--------" breaks

You are only qualified for the reward if you have signed a contract agreement for Clyde Cash before entering the Trolling establishment. Reward qualifies for you to Pay tribute to Tito for Security Protection, along with forfeiting your white women for the black [[man in the pickle suit]]. You will not be qualified for the reward if you are Chris Chan.

And another thing little cuz, the reward money is for people who TROLL you. You can't troll yourself, so how can you collect the money?
 These trolls do not have welfare to depend on like do you fatty. It's their job to troll you. They rely on their trolling prizes to survive.

Now if you were that cool trolling guy [[User talk:JenkinsJinkies|jenkinsjinkies]] The money would've been his seeing that he was closer to you.

The Reward Was For Trolling You

Did the [[Transformers|Autobots]] ever give the Decepticons reward money because the decepticons stole their own energon? I think not, little cuz.

Did you know that you destroyed the only ps3 with backwards compatibility?

You smashed a $700 dollar console you fucking [[NAIVE]] IDIOT!

That is the only console you could've got all of your money back & probably even more $$$.

no other version of the console can do that.

I don't about giving you the cash but I can at the LEAST give you the bubble wrap that you wanted.

As the Ancient Hawaiians Used to say:

Just Because you can afford the modern long board, doesn't you can mean honor the moving water}}

{{quotebox|Sun, Aug 29, 2010 at 7:12 PM

Look, I did the deed of Destroying my "PSTriple", WITH a Brick and then some; I Provided the Video and Photographic Footage; You did not specify Troll or Not in your Topic. And your Break Lines are ONLY Break Lines between each Topic of "Wanted" and "Rewards". And Your Superior, Clyde Cash himself, has given You Orders to Pay Me the Reward. It should not matter of the witness of Junior Jenkins. And Confidentially, I actually Met him in person, and we have a mutual understanding of each other. And as an individual in your game, I respect him as a person with a bright future in front of him. I have forgiven HIM for being a Troll. And I will also confide in you that I have made a Promise to God that after I have the Legal $9001 Cash in my hands, I swore to Forgive ALL of the Trolls, including You And Clyde; [[No More Jokes|NO MORE CURSES]] or BEING CURSED.

So just continue with carrying out your orders to send me the Full Cash Reward, and we can all move forward with our lives in peace.

Thank you.
Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Ok fatty, Clyde really likes your video. He wants me to bend the rules.

Let's pick a dropoff point for the money.

Meet me at:

[[The GAMe PLACe|243 Ridge McIntire Road
Charlottesville, VA]]

at 2:00 PM tomorrow.

An agent in a [[pickle]] suit will meet you there with $9001 in twenty dollar denominations.

If you're not there at 2:00 pm I'm spending the money on hookers and blow. I don't care what Clyde says, I don't feel like giving a [[Monthly tugboat|welfare sapping]] [[fat]] shit like you a bunch of money

As The Ancient Hawaiians Used to say:

Don't Be late.

Your Troll 
Tito}}

{{quotebox|Sun, Aug 29, 2010 at 10:16 PM

I got it. I will be there.}}

{{quotebox|Sun, Aug 29, 2010 at 10:46 PM

I will meet you there in front of the Staples of 243 Ridge McIntire Road, and NOT the store next door or anywhere else. I will be waiting in my car in a parking space in front of the Staples. No Negotiations.}}

{{quoteboxred|Haha. Who do you think you are calling the shots?

Look, we're paying people to troll you. You can't troll yourself. I'm only even giving you this money because Clyde seems to think that killing your PS3 was improvement on your life.

Don't test me, you are in no position to dictate terms to me fatty.

Do you understand that? You are relying on my generosity fatso, do NOT test me.

Ok, fine fatty, meet me in [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|Fashion Square mall]]. In front of [[Chick-fil-A]]. 2:00 PM tomorrow. If you do not show up, I am taking this money to the nearest Hawaiian Brothel.

Capiche?
Tito}}

{{quotebox|Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 12:41 AM

Chick-Fil-A at Fashion Square; 2:00 PM. I will be there.}}

{{quoteboxred|Wait wait wait, hold the fucking phone.

I just had one of Clyde's asian technicians look at the video.

They spotted an intact hard drive in the corner of one of the frames.

You greasy fat weasel. You're saving the hard drive.

No, you're not getting your money until we get [[ItIsFinished.MOV|video of you smashing the three hard drives you have]]. Forget using a Brick, it's clear that even the asian girl that smashed the ps3 had more strength than you. I'm sure that you were in so much distress when you destroyed your ps3, it must've felt like what a mother feels when she drowns a baby in a sink. You hold that much feeling for an object it makes me repulsed.

I don't care how it gets destroyed, Bricked, Car, & [[knife]]d. Hell I would suggest you would do All 3 for this shit.

And Clyde was going to give you this money because he thought you were improving. I don't even want to show him the evidence of you being a sneaky fat rat, little cuz. You owe him that much

Listen here, I am the Hawaiian Joe Pesci to Clyde's Robert De Niro from [[Wikipedia:Casino (film)|Casino]]. I make sure what Clyde wants, Clyde Gets, and a naive [[Robotnik]] look-a-like such as yourself is going to get money from the boss.

& don't even try to think you have any upper hand in the negotiations. May I remind that you weren't even eligible for the reward in the first place.

you are in no position to dictate terms to me. I could be an total asshole and make you fulfill [[Jack Thaddeus|Jack Thadeus]]' deal to sing [[It's UGH!|Okay 2 b gay]] correctly. Remember Jack's "black mail" that you so call it. Even at that time you thought you had any bargaining privileges. But I'm not going to unless if you goof up again

But Right Now i'm feeling generous to give you 1 last chance.

There was an Ancient Hawaiian saying:
"He who owns the gold makes the rules."

Fuck you,

Tito

Get me that video or you get nothing.

P.S: Why the fuck are you apologizing to [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment of [[America]]? You treat a fucking corporation like it's god damned human being. Some CEO Big shot from Sony is probably viewing your video from his mansion viewing your antics like a boy views ants}}

{{quotebox|Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 6:20 AM

Enjoy the Destruction More.

Chick-Fil-A at Fashion Square; 2:00 PM; TODAY. I will be waiting for the Cash for me and my Sweetheart's Future.

Christian.}}

{{quotebox|Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 6:29 AM

to answer your question, there were a LOT of people who worked hard with the machines to construct the pieces, put them together, program and distribute the machine before I bought it. I am a man who Cares and Respects good people, and I did not want to dis them, so I made the statement.}}

{{quoteboxred|What an awful, awful person you are. You're more concerned with the feelings of a faceless corporation that exists to squeeze money out of you than: your parents, your friends or the taxpayers who work hard to support your fat ass. And I'm sure this will all be pointless because you're going to get another PS3.}}

{{quoteboxred|just talked to Junior, he said he never would've made any agreement with a welfare sapping naive retarded bastard such as yourself.

what are trying to pull to fatty?}}

Chris attached all the Tito e-mails to a message to Clyde, and added this:
{{quotebox|Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 1:44 PM

**Clyde, let me share with you what your correspondent, Tito, has been saying to me, and he is Resistant to Pay Me the Reward I have earned from my console destruction.}}

{{quotebox|Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 1:52 PM

**For your information, I would not get another PS3.}}

To Tito:
{{quotebox|Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 1:58 PM

For your information, I would Not get another PS3, and I was at the Mall waiting for the cash from 1:30 to 2:10 PM. And after I read your e-mail, I went over and talked to Junior; he has NOT received any communication from you. AND even though he still has his anger against me, he and I still have a mutual understanding and agreements between each other. He told me that while he will continue to support your cause to bad-mouth me, he is cool with me getting my money, even though some of it came from his own tax dollars. Quit your damn Bitching and Redeem yourself by Giving me the $9001 Cash for my Console's Destruction.

Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Heh fatty, I just read that email that you sent to Clyde earlier. Clyde informed me to relay that he doesn't appreciate a shit stirring faggot like yourself trying to cause drama. Clyde left me in charge of disseminating this money to you. I control his finances. He empowered me to tell you to fuck off if you do anything funny.

You have to deal with me.

Since we have a few picklemen working at Fashion Square, we can have one of them pay you. Meet our agent at the Starbucks at 2:00 PM.

We'll be there, our agent should have a briefcase with the cash.

Don't try to dictate terms to us. You either meet on our terms, or you don't get your money. Makes no difference to me. Actually, it'd be cool if you got cocky and gave me reason to tell you to fuck off. Then I'd take your money to a whorehouse.

You may be a bigshot over at 14 branchland court but your tugboat don't float in our waters, little cuz.

Your troll, 
tito.}}

{{quotebox|Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 9:14 PM

I had the theory of tardiness, and I was uncertain. But I will give you one more chance. Today, Tuesday the 31st, as you said at the Fashion Square's Starbucks at 2:00 PM. I will be there. Please inform me how I will recognize your agent.

Christian.}}

{{quoteboxred|Look Buddy, you're giving ME one more chance, lard ass?

Tell me how many other people are lining up to give you $9,001. (there aren't). Giving you 1 dollar of that is a bad idea enough.

You will recognize the agent that will give you the money, She'll have a pickle Tattoo right on her nice rack that is about as big as your man boobs, little cuz.}}

{{quotebox|Mon, Aug 30, 2010 at 9:47 PM

I apologize for offending you with the comment. I will keep my eyes open for the female agent then; pickle tattoo on her breast.}}

{{quotebox|Tue, Aug 31, 2010 at 3:44 PM

I was at the Starbucks in Fashion Square for over an hour, and come 2:00 PM and later; No Pickle-Breasted Woman showed up. I do not care for Wild Goose Chases, and my patience is wearing thin. Let's agree to have one of your Agents come to my house tomorrow afternoon to deliver the $9001 Cash at 2:00 PM; all she has to do is ring the doorbell, and I will answer.

Sincerely,
Christian.}}

{{quoteboxred|You want more money? We gave you your money. We first went to the Starbucks inside the mall and we didn't see you. We saw some fat guy with big juggly hooters but no Christian Weston Chandler.

We thought you got mixed up and went to the wrong Starbucks, so we tried the other one and we found you. You had your [[medallion]] and your sapphire [[high school ring]], so we knew it was the true and honest Chris-Chan.

You looked like you lost some weight, congrats.

Your Troll, 
Tito}}

{{quotebox|Tue, Aug 31, 2010 at 4:30 PM

Liar; you did not see me at all. Don't cheat your way out of this.}}

{{quoteboxred|No, you fat shit, you're trying to rip us off. We saw [[Liquid Chris|you in your brown striped shirt]] with your sapphire high school ring. I talked to [[Kacey|your wife]] with the big boobs. I know it was you because of the retarded voice, the sapphire ring and the medallion.}}

Clyde sent this:
{{quoteboxred|You're going to have to beg, bitch.

You say you have some girlfriend. Prove it. What's her name?}}

{{quotebox|Wed, Sep 1, 2010 at 9:53 AM

With due respect, I am NOT going to reveal her name, because I do not want you bastards pestering the hell out of her; she does not need it. And I am tired of your game of Goose-Chase; I KNOW you AND Tito are NOT going to give me even a half a Penny of any money, even after I've broken my one PS3 I paid 400 dollars for in 2007.

You both want me to even Beg, you can go point at your own damn snouts and Oink like [[South Park|Eric Cartman]], and then [[Rape]] yourselves with your own Damn [[sex toys|Darth Maul Dual LightSabre.]]

Fuck Off and Die, BOTH of you.}}

[[Category:E-mails]]

Chris and the Internet

2010-07-20T05:41:14Z

Travis Cwckle:

The '''Internet''' is a specialized computer programming that allows the transmission of data through long distances through a massive collection of networks connected all over the world. The Internet has grown since its first real conception in the 1980s as a means for [[Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College|universities]] to communicate with each other. It is said that nearly 2 billion people are connected to the Internet.

One of those is [[Christian Weston Chandler|a fat, whiny, bigoted, misogynistic, and egotistical manchild.]] He is the Internet's [[Basement_Rosechus|battered girlfriend]] who always comes back for more.

==Understanding==

Chris seems to be aware that the Internet is a place where, once you put something up, anyone with access to a computer could see it. However, due to a combination of his ego and his [[Autism|general inability to understand others]], Chris has come to the conclusion that if he puts anything on the Internet, everyone ''will'' see it; and if you direct a message to someone, ''only'' they will see it. Chris has in the past attempted to address videos to specific people, from [[Congrats,_Jack_Black|celebrities]] to [[Shigeru Miyamoto|potential employers]] to [[Ivy|internet girlfriends]]. Most telling is [[100_2178|his 8 May 2010 rant]], which was addressed to anyone who served on the Green County School Board in the early 1990's.

Chris sees no problem in dropping [[Honest Content|highly sensitive information]] over his videos — including his phone number, [[14 Branchland Court|street address]], and the secret name of [[The Wallflower|the girl]] he desperately wants to be his [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]]. He doesn't understand that [[YouTube]] is a public website and not an instant messaging service, never paying attention to the deluge of comments he gets from horrified onlookers that definitively prove his "[[For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only|private]]" messages are anything but.

Chris has been on the Internet for some time, yet does not understand how to act online any more than he does in [[Sonichu%27s_Edge|real]] [[Michael_Snyder_is_ColdHearted_and_Mean|life]]. While many users of the Internet contribute content, are [[White_knight|polite and helpful]], and generally [[Chris_and_the_Law|follow any established rules]], Chris sees [[Wikipedia|all]] [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica|web]][[CWCki|sites]] as vehicles to spew his [[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_the_CWCki|self]]-[[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica|serving]] [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile|version]] of [[Honest_content|the truth]]. Even worse, when given his own website, he audaciously claims that [[CWC_Blog#January_2010|it is he who has control over the site]], not [[User:cogsdev|the Sysop]] who does the work of setting it up, or the [[Jack_Thaddeus|advertisers]] who pay for it.

==Forums and bans==

As with many places in real life, Chris has found himself banned from the few places he frequents online.

Chris does not normally participate in forum discussions, either due to a dislike of reading or simple egotism. When he does, he always signs his message — be it a comment on YouTube, a rant on the [[Adult Swim]] [[Adult_Swim_posts|boards]], or a complaint about something in ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''.<ref>http://forums.littlebigworkshop.com/t5/PS3-Workshop/Complaints-on-the-Sonic-the-Hedgehog-and-Werehog-Costumes/m-p/239893;jsessionid=C15F46579256D040386028A0EAB09412</ref> He never follows up on these posts either, nor does he read the comments left by other users, just like on YouTube. Any retractions or responses are saved for completely unrelated posts elsewhere on the Internet.

Coincidentally, Internet forums are havens for socially retarded, thirty-something man-children who still live with [[Barbara_Chandler|Mommy]] and [[Bob_Chandler|Daddy]]. By simply choosing a handle that has nothing to do with Sonichu, and participating even a little in forum discussions, Chris could shed (for a while) his lolcow status and form online friendships with other sad bastards like himself. However, either Chris can't do that or his [[ego]] refuses to let him do that. Everywhere he goes, he plasters his full name, [[Chris-Chan]], or [[Sonichu]] in his user name or in his posts, forever certifying that where ever Chris goes, trolls will be right behind to see what kind of fail he's done this time around.

Thanks to his screwed up conversation filter, Chris has done stupid stuff and has stuff taken down or been banned from places. However, due to his relative inactivity concerning Internet forums, he's banned from fewer places online than expected. He was banned from [[deviantART]] in the summer of 2009 for posting the uncensored version of Sonichu 9 without an [[Honest_content|NSFW]] tag, though he doesn't understand why--comments left on his CWCipedia talk page suggest that he is under the impression that his dA account simply vanished into cyberspace for no reason. He was also banned earlier for the uncensored version of Sonichu 8. As well, despite bouncing from one account to the next, Chris has only been [[The July 10th Messages|banned once]] from [[YouTube]]. However, unlike DA, Chris has constantly made new accounts after one was taken down or abandoned. He has also had posts modded at [[GameFAQs]] when he attempted to solicit money for special characters in [[ModNation Racers]].

His most grievous ban to date involves [[Flipnote Hatena]]. Between 29 June and 2 July, Chris had [[RomanticLabyrinth|the same Flipnote]] removed from the site ''four times'' because of its sexual nature, with Chris thinking it was being removed by trolls instead of the fact that a Nintendo-owned website wouldn't ''like'' that sort of thing being put on their site. Because of this and other flipnotes he had uploaded and reuploaded, the mods have banned Chris for life from posting there.

One notices a pattern in all of this--Chris is simply too lazy to read a website's terms of service. He just meanders onto a website and begins to post whatever he wants, reacting with shock when he crosses a line because he either did not bother trying to learn it's location or thought it was somewhere else. When protesting his ban from Wikipedia for violating one of their numerous rules, he argued that he didn't have the time to read the pages upon pages of fine print that stipulated what constituted acceptable behavior.

== Attempts to leave the Internet ==

As the saying goes, "when the going gets tough, the tough get going". However, in Chris's case, he takes this and butchers it — when [[trolls]] descend on him and [[Stress|torture]] him, he gets up and leaves. He's like a child who packs up all of his toys and goes home when things don't go his way. For many trolls, this would be a great victory — threatening to quit the Internet forever is such a common reaction to trolling it has its own [[ED]] article. However, Chris just can't stand to get away from the Internet.

His [[Youtube Finale|first attempt]] to abandon the Internet was in the aftermath of the [[Julie]] incident; tired of [[Clyde Cash]]'s trolling, Chris proclaimed that he was leaving the Internet. Instead of doing that, he disappeared for all of two weeks, before creating a new account on YouTube. His [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|second]], [[100 2188|third]], and [[100 2189|fourth attempts]] all seemed to have been directed by an [[Rocky Shoemaker|outside force]]. Of course, Chris being Chris, he never made good on his word to stay off.

After he made his second announcement of leaving the Internet, he made a [[Cleveland_Show_Voice_Rant|rant about the Cleveland Show]] a mere ''36 hours later''. He also made his fourth announcement of leaving the Internet just ''four days'' after making his third announcement, saying that the [[Kick the Autistic|trolls have scared him from the Internet, that he is literally afraid of the internet]]. Chris being Chris, he returned just [[June062010.MOV|one week]] after this grand proclamation. After talking about how he almost committed vehicular homicide, he makes his ''fifth'' announcement that he is leaving the Internet.

Nearly two weeks after his ''final'' abandonment of the Internet, he was spotted at [[Fridays After Five]] playing [[Flipnote Hatena|Flipnote Studio]] on his [[Nintendo]] DSi. He soon discovered the pictures and videos of him on the Internet and broke his exile to post his response to it all on Flipnote Hatena the next day, saying that he wishes trolls would stop spreading his bad reputation around. This shows not only that Chris is still looking out for his Internet reputation, but that he also assumes that by telling trolls "I'm leaving the internet forever," he expects them to stop talking about him.

What Chris doesn't seem to realize is that the [[PS3#Playstation_Network|PSN]] he [[Chris_humps_his_PS3|loves]] [[List_of_Chris%27s_PSN_video_downloads|so]] [[List_of_Chris%27s_PSN_game_downloads|dearly]] and Flipnote Studios are all technically a part of the Internet, as they consist of a network of interconnected computers/devices. So when he says that he will be leaving the Internet, he is clearly [[Chris and hypocrisy|full of shit]], as he has only sworn off the parts of the internet [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica|that]] [[CWCki|bother]] [[4-cent_garbage.com|him]]. A quick check of his YouTube profile will usually reveal he has signed on within the last 12-24 hours, which means he still visits YouTube daily, and he's recently taken to [[Twitter]], Gamespot, and [[GameFAQs]] to beg for [[ModNation Racers]] codes.

== Will Chris ever really leave? ==

It's possible, perhaps even inevitable, that circumstances will enable Chris to really leave the Internet. The most likely reason would be the death or intervention of [[Robert Chandler|certain benefactors]] that keep the Internet train a-rolling. Another, only marginally less likely, would be the end-result of Chris's terminal slothfulness: just ceasing to give a shit about anything except [[video games]], [[toys]], and his [[CWCville|Happy Place]]. If pressed, Chris always claims to be "workin' on it ([[Sonichu]]/[[job|employment]]/the [[Love Quest]]/etc.)," but effort is anathema to Chris.

It is highly unlikely that he'll ever leave the Internet of his own volition. Chris thrives on attention just as much as he is burned by the terrible strain of effort. Like an abused spouse, he may never leave unless someone else steps in. [[Trolls|Being the horrible people we are]], we'd rather have it that he stay. And now, with the [[Fridays After Five|trolling efforts]] of field agents in play, it seems the only way Chris will ever truly leave the internet will be through his [[Chris and Health|inevitable]] [[death]].

==References==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}
{{The Internet}}
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Chris and the Internet

2010-07-20T05:39:48Z

Travis Cwckle:

The '''Internet''' is a specialized computer programming that allows the transmission of data through long distances through a massive collection of networks connected all over the world. The Internet has grown since its first real conception in the 1980s as a means for [[Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College|universities]] to communicate with each other. It is said that nearly 2 billion people are connected to the Internet.

One of those is [[Christian Weston Chandler|a fat, whiny, bigoted, misogynistic, and egotistical manchild.]] He is the Internet's [[Basement_Rosechus|battered girlfriend]] who always comes back for more.

==Understanding==

Chris seems to be aware that the Internet is a place where, once you put something up, anyone with access to a computer could see it. However, due to a combination of his ego and his [[Autism|general inability to understand others]], Chris has come to the conclusion that if he puts anything on the Internet, everyone ''will'' see it; and if you direct a message to someone, ''only'' they will see it. Chris has in the past attempted to address videos to specific people, from [[Congrats,_Jack_Black|celebrities]] to [[Shigeru Miyamoto|potential employers]] to [[Ivy|internet girlfriends]]. Most telling is [[100_2178|his 8 May 2010 rant]], which was addressed to anyone who served on the Green County School Board in the early 1990's.

Chris sees no problem in dropping [[Honest Content|highly sensitive information]] over his videos — including his phone number, [[14 Brancland Court|street address]], and the secret name of [[The Wallflower|the girl]] he desperately wants to be his [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]]. He doesn't understand that [[YouTube]] is a public website and not an instant messaging service, never paying attention to the deluge of comments he gets from horrified onlookers that definitively prove his "[[For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only|private]]" messages are anything but.

Chris has been on the Internet for some time, yet does not understand how to act online any more than he does in [[Sonichu%27s_Edge|real]] [[Michael_Snyder_is_ColdHearted_and_Mean|life]]. While many users of the Internet contribute content, are [[White_knight|polite and helpful]], and generally [[Chris_and_the_Law|follow any established rules]], Chris sees [[Wikipedia|all]] [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica|web]][[CWCki|sites]] as vehicles to spew his [[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_the_CWCki|self]]-[[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica|serving]] [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile|version]] of [[Honest_content|the truth]]. Even worse, when given his own website, he audaciously claims that [[CWC_Blog#January_2010|it is he who has control over the site]], not [[User:cogsdev|the Sysop]] who does the work of setting it up, or the [[Jack_Thaddeus|advertisers]] who pay for it.

==Forums and bans==

As with many places in real life, Chris has found himself banned from the few places he frequents online.

Chris does not normally participate in forum discussions, either due to a dislike of reading or simple egotism. When he does, he always signs his message — be it a comment on YouTube, a rant on the [[Adult Swim]] [[Adult_Swim_posts|boards]], or a complaint about something in ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''.<ref>http://forums.littlebigworkshop.com/t5/PS3-Workshop/Complaints-on-the-Sonic-the-Hedgehog-and-Werehog-Costumes/m-p/239893;jsessionid=C15F46579256D040386028A0EAB09412</ref> He never follows up on these posts either, nor does he read the comments left by other users, just like on YouTube. Any retractions or responses are saved for completely unrelated posts elsewhere on the Internet.

Coincidentally, Internet forums are havens for socially retarded, thirty-something man-children who still live with [[Barbara_Chandler|Mommy]] and [[Bob_Chandler|Daddy]]. By simply choosing a handle that has nothing to do with Sonichu, and participating even a little in forum discussions, Chris could shed (for a while) his lolcow status and form online friendships with other sad bastards like himself. However, either Chris can't do that or his [[ego]] refuses to let him do that. Everywhere he goes, he plasters his full name, [[Chris-Chan]], or [[Sonichu]] in his user name or in his posts, forever certifying that where ever Chris goes, trolls will be right behind to see what kind of fail he's done this time around.

Thanks to his screwed up conversation filter, Chris has done stupid stuff and has stuff taken down or been banned from places. However, due to his relative inactivity concerning Internet forums, he's banned from fewer places online than expected. He was banned from [[deviantART]] in the summer of 2009 for posting the uncensored version of Sonichu 9 without an [[Honest_content|NSFW]] tag, though he doesn't understand why--comments left on his CWCipedia talk page suggest that he is under the impression that his dA account simply vanished into cyberspace for no reason. He was also banned earlier for the uncensored version of Sonichu 8. As well, despite bouncing from one account to the next, Chris has only been [[The July 10th Messages|banned once]] from [[YouTube]]. However, unlike DA, Chris has constantly made new accounts after one was taken down or abandoned. He has also had posts modded at [[GameFAQs]] when he attempted to solicit money for special characters in [[ModNation Racers]].

His most grievous ban to date involves [[Flipnote Hatena]]. Between 29 June and 2 July, Chris had [[RomanticLabyrinth|the same Flipnote]] removed from the site ''four times'' because of its sexual nature, with Chris thinking it was being removed by trolls instead of the fact that a Nintendo-owned website wouldn't ''like'' that sort of thing being put on their site. Because of this and other flipnotes he had uploaded and reuploaded, the mods have banned Chris for life from posting there.

One notices a pattern in all of this--Chris is simply too lazy to read a website's terms of service. He just meanders onto a website and begins to post whatever he wants, reacting with shock when he crosses a line because he either did not bother trying to learn it's location or thought it was somewhere else. When protesting his ban from Wikipedia for violating one of their numerous rules, he argued that he didn't have the time to read the pages upon pages of fine print that stipulated what constituted acceptable behavior.

== Attempts to leave the Internet ==

As the saying goes, "when the going gets tough, the tough get going". However, in Chris's case, he takes this and butchers it — when [[trolls]] descend on him and [[Stress|torture]] him, he gets up and leaves. He's like a child who packs up all of his toys and goes home when things don't go his way. For many trolls, this would be a great victory — threatening to quit the Internet forever is such a common reaction to trolling it has its own [[ED]] article. However, Chris just can't stand to get away from the Internet.

His [[Youtube Finale|first attempt]] to abandon the Internet was in the aftermath of the [[Julie]] incident; tired of [[Clyde Cash]]'s trolling, Chris proclaimed that he was leaving the Internet. Instead of doing that, he disappeared for all of two weeks, before creating a new account on YouTube. His [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|second]], [[100 2188|third]], and [[100 2189|fourth attempts]] all seemed to have been directed by an [[Rocky Shoemaker|outside force]]. Of course, Chris being Chris, he never made good on his word to stay off.

After he made his second announcement of leaving the Internet, he made a [[Cleveland_Show_Voice_Rant|rant about the Cleveland Show]] a mere ''36 hours later''. He also made his fourth announcement of leaving the Internet just ''four days'' after making his third announcement, saying that the [[Kick the Autistic|trolls have scared him from the Internet, that he is literally afraid of the internet]]. Chris being Chris, he returned just [[June062010.MOV|one week]] after this grand proclamation. After talking about how he almost committed vehicular homicide, he makes his ''fifth'' announcement that he is leaving the Internet.

Nearly two weeks after his ''final'' abandonment of the Internet, he was spotted at [[Fridays After Five]] playing [[Flipnote Hatena|Flipnote Studio]] on his [[Nintendo]] DSi. He soon discovered the pictures and videos of him on the Internet and broke his exile to post his response to it all on Flipnote Hatena the next day, saying that he wishes trolls would stop spreading his bad reputation around. This shows not only that Chris is still looking out for his Internet reputation, but that he also assumes that by telling trolls "I'm leaving the internet forever," he expects them to stop talking about him.

What Chris doesn't seem to realize is that the [[PS3#Playstation_Network|PSN]] he [[Chris_humps_his_PS3|loves]] [[List_of_Chris%27s_PSN_video_downloads|so]] [[List_of_Chris%27s_PSN_game_downloads|dearly]] and Flipnote Studios are all technically a part of the Internet, as they consist of a network of interconnected computers/devices. So when he says that he will be leaving the Internet, he is clearly [[Chris and hypocrisy|full of shit]], as he has only sworn off the parts of the internet [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica|that]] [[CWCki|bother]] [[4-cent_garbage.com|him]]. A quick check of his YouTube profile will usually reveal he has signed on within the last 12-24 hours, which means he still visits YouTube daily, and he's recently taken to [[Twitter]], Gamespot, and [[GameFAQs]] to beg for [[ModNation Racers]] codes.

== Will Chris ever really leave? ==

It's possible, perhaps even inevitable, that circumstances will enable Chris to really leave the Internet. The most likely reason would be the death or intervention of [[Robert Chandler|certain benefactors]] that keep the Internet train a-rolling. Another, only marginally less likely, would be the end-result of Chris's terminal slothfulness: just ceasing to give a shit about anything except [[video games]], [[toys]], and his [[CWCville|Happy Place]]. If pressed, Chris always claims to be "workin' on it ([[Sonichu]]/[[job|employment]]/the [[Love Quest]]/etc.)," but effort is anathema to Chris.

It is highly unlikely that he'll ever leave the Internet of his own volition. Chris thrives on attention just as much as he is burned by the terrible strain of effort. Like an abused spouse, he may never leave unless someone else steps in. [[Trolls|Being the horrible people we are]], we'd rather have it that he stay. And now, with the [[Fridays After Five|trolling efforts]] of field agents in play, it seems the only way Chris will ever truly leave the internet will be through his [[Chris and Health|inevitable]] [[death]].

==References==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}
{{The Internet}}
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

List of Chris's games

2010-07-18T17:59:31Z

Travis Cwckle:

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[Image:0828-EP12-5P7-1.jpg|thumb|left|[[CWCki]]'s American readers helped pay for this. Anyone else suddenly feel like cheating on their taxes?]]
[[File:ChrisGameShop.jpg|thumb|One of their most valuable customers.]]

This is a catalog of [[Chris]]'s '''video game collection''', based in large part on a spreadsheet he sent to [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] in order to show how dedicated he is to video games. He surely is. The actual [http://www.mediafire.com/?mdn5wamumtv Excel file] contains more information about each game that Chris listed himself for some reason, like number of players for each game. Some games are obvious (every ''[[Sonic]]'' game (almost), every ''[[Pokémon]]'' game), some are surprising (''[[Homos|Barbie Game Girl]]''), and some are just...bizarre (''Powerpuff Girls: Relish Rampage [[Pickles|Pickled]] Edition'').

For whatever reason, Chris's game inventory also includes demo discs, game peripherals (such as his [[PSEye]]), and other things that can't really be considered games (such as [[Wikipedia:Game Boy Advance Video|Game Boy Advance Video]] cartridges, a concept that failed to appeal to almost any American consumers...except, apparently, for Chris, who bought several of them). God only knows why Chris felt it was a brilliant idea to send a [[Nintendo]] executive a list of games he has on competing platforms, or to send a list of imports to a game company that practically invented region lock-out to prevent games from being imported.

The bulk of the list is only accurate to around the time of the [[Miyamoto Saga]], in January 2009. Luckily, his public [[PSN]] profile and other sources of information have made it possible to get a clearer picture of his ever-expanding [[PS3]] collection. Also, [[Hex Bawx|Xbox]] games and hardware are conspicuously missing from the list, but according to his [[List of Chris's eBay sales|eBay sales]], he most likely owned one at some point.

The damn slanderous [[trolls]] conservatively estimate that Chris and his family have spent at least $30,000 on video games in his lifetime (including $1,000 from a [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|1994 shopping spree]]), roughly 3 times the amount of Chris's annual [[Tugboat|income]] — your tax dollars at work. As of 2010, for downloaded games and other PSN content alone, he has spent nearly $3,500, and the toll continues to rise.

==The Games==
{| class="wikitable sortable"
|-
!align="left"|Title
!align="left"|Publisher
!align="left"|Platform
!align="left"|Notes
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:1942 (video game)|1942]]''
|Capcom
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Baseball (1983 video game)|Baseball]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Batman (Nintendo Entertainment System)|Batman]]''
|Sunsoft
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Castlequest|Castlequest]]''
|Nexoft
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Castlevania|Castlevania]]''
|Konami
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Castlevania II: Simon's Quest|Castlevania II: Simon's Quest]]''
|Konami
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Castlevania III: Dracula's Curse|Castlevania III: Dracula's Curse]]''
|Konami
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Dance Aerobics|Dance Aerobics]]''
|Bandai
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Donkey Kong 3|Donkey Kong 3]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''Donkey Kong Classics''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''Déjà Vu''
|Kemco-Seika
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Dr. Mario (video game)|Dr. Mario]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Gyruss#NES_and_Famicom|Gyruss]]''
|Ultra Games
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Kabuki Quantum Fighter|Kabuki Quantum Fighter]]''
|HAL
|NES
|
|-
|''Kirby's Adventure''
|Nintendo
|NES
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Kung Fu''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:The Legend of Zelda (video game)|The Legend of Zelda]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Little Nemo: The Dream Master|Little Nemo: The Dream Master]]''
|Capcom
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:M.C. Kids|M.C. Kids]]''
|Virgin Games
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Mendel Palace|Mendel Palace]]''
|Hudson Soft
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Metroid|Metroid]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''Milon's Secret Castle''
|Hudson
|NES
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Ninja Gaiden (Nintendo Entertainment System)|Ninja Gaiden]]''
|Tecmo
|NES
|
|-
|''Pac-Man''
|Tengen
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Pin*Bot (video game)|Pin-Bot]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:R.C. Pro-Am|R.C. Pro-AM]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''Sesame Street ABC''
|Hi-Tech
|NES
|
|-
|''Short Order/Eggsplode''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''Solomon's Key''
|Hudson
|NES
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:StarTropics|StarTropics]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Super Glove Ball|Super Glove Ball]]''
|Mattel
|NES
|Given that this game came with the [[Wikipedia:Power Glove|Power Glove]], it is possible Chris also owns the Glove (which is so...bad).
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Super Mario Bros|Super Mario Brothers]]/[[Wikipedia:Duck Hunt|Duck Hunt]]/World Class Track Meet''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Super Mario Bros. 2|Super Mario Brothers 2]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Super Mario Bros. 3|Super Mario Brothers 3]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1989 video game)|Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles]]''
|Ultra Games
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Teenage_Mutant_Ninja_Turtles_II:_The_Arcade_Game#Ports|Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Arcade Game]]''
|Ultra Games
|NES
|
|-
|''Tennis''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''Tetris''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''Tetris 2''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:The Three Stooges (video game)|The Three Stooges]]''
|Activision
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Wario's Woods|Wario's Woods]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Wheel_of_Fortune_(video_game)#NES_version|Wheel of Fortune]]''
|GameTek
|NES
|
|-
|''Wrecking Crew''
|Nintendo
|NES
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Yoshi (video game)|Yoshi]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Zelda II: The Adventure of Link|Zelda II: The Adventure of Link]]''
|Nintendo
|NES
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Alleyway|Alleyway]]''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Barbie: Game Girl|Barbie: Game Girl]]''
|Hi-Tech
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Bases Loaded (video game)|Bases Loaded]]''
|Jaleco
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:A Boy and His Blob in The Rescue of Princess Blobette|A Boy and His Blob: The Rescue of Princess Blobette]]''
|Absolute
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Brainbender''
|Electro-Brain
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Castlevania: The Adventure|Castlevania Adventure]]''
|Konami
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Cool Spot|Cool Spot]]''
|Virgin Interactive
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Darkwing_Duck_(Capcom)|Darkwing]] [[Darkbind_Sonichu|Duck]]''
|Sunsoft
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Donkey Kong (Game Boy)|Donkey Kong]]''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Donkey Kong Land|Donkey Kong Land]]''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Dr. Mario''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|'''''[[Donald Duck|Duck Tales]]'''''
|Capcom
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:F-1 Race|F-1 Race]]''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:List_of_Fist_of_the_North_Star_video_games|Fist of the North Star]]''
|Electro-Brain
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Game_and_Watch_Gallery#Game_.26_Watch_Gallery|Game and Watch Gallery]]''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Game Boy Camera|Game Boy Camera (red)]]''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Game Boy Camera (blue)''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Golf''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Heiankyo Alien|Heiankyo Alien]]''
|Meldac
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Home Alone (video game)|Home Alone]]''
|THQ
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Kid Icarus|Kid Icarus]]''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Kirby's Dream Land|Kirby's Dream Land]]''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Kwirk''
|Acclaim
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Marble Madness''
|Mindscape
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Mega Man''
|Capcom
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Mega Man II''
|Capcom
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Metroid II: Return of Samus''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''[[Power_Rangers|Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers]]''
|Bandai
|Game Boy
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Blue''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Red''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Pretty Soldier Sailor Moon''
|Angel
|Game Boy
|A Japanese import
|-
|''Pretty Soilder Sailor Moon R''
|Angel
|Game Boy
|A Japanese import
|-
|''Qix''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Quarth''
|Ultra Games
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Ren & Stimpy: Cadet Adventures''
|THQ
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Revenge of the Gator''
|HAL
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Shanghai''
|HAL
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Super Mario Land''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Super Scrabble''
|Milton-Bradley
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles''
|Ultra Games
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Tennis''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Tetris''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Tetris 2''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Tiny Toon Adventures: Babs' Big Break''
|Konami
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Turrican''
|Accolade
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Wario Blast''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Wave Race''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Who Framed Roger Rabbit?''
|Capcom
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''Yoshi''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy
|
|-
|''The Chessmaster''
|Mindscape
|SNES
|
|-
|''Legend of the Mystical Ninja
|Konami
|NES
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Mario Paint''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Megan Man X''
|Capcom
|SNES
|Did he just write [[Megan]] Man?
|-
|''Pilotwings''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Star Fox''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Stunt Race FX''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Super Game Boy''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Super Mario All-Stars''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Super Mario Kart''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Super Mario World''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Super Metroid''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Super Scope 6-in-1''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: Turtles in Time''
|Konami
|SNES
|
|-
|''Yoshi's Safari''
|Nintendo
|SNES
|
|-
|''Banjo-Kazooie
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Cruisn' USA
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Diddy Kong Racing
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Hey You, Pikachu!
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Lego Racers
|Lego Media
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Mario Kart 64
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Mischief Makers
||Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Paper Mario''
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Puzzle League
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Snap
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Snap
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Stadium
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Stadium 2
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Sin_%26_Punishment|Sin & Punishment]]''
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Star Fox 64
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Super Mario 64
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Wave Race 64''
||Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Yoshi's Story''
|Nintendo
|Nintendo 64
|
|-
|''Game & Watch Gallery 2''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|''Game & Watch Gallery 3''
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|''Gex: Enter the Gecko''
|Crave
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Crystal
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Gold
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Pinball
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Puzzle Challenge
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Silver
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Trading Card Game
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Yellow
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|''Super Mario Bros. Deluxe
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Color
|
|-
|''Chu Chu Rocket
|Sega
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Classic NES Series: Super Mario Bros.
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''e-Reader
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|Nintendo’s barcode reader peripheral for ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' and other games.
|-
|''Futari Wa Pretty Cure
|Bandai
|Game Boy Advance
|A Japanese import
|-
|''Futari Wa Pretty Cure Max Heart
|Bandai
|Game Boy Advance
|A Japanese import
|-
|''Game & Watch Gallery 4
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Game Boy Advance Jukebox
|Gamester
|Game Boy Advance
|A GBA player for MP3 music files.
|-
|''Gumby Vs. the Astrobots
|Namco
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi: Kaznapped
|THQ
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Klonoa 2: Dream Champ Tournament
|Namco
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Mario Kart: Super Circuit
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Mario vs. Donkey Kong
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Metroid Fusion
||Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[My Little Pony]]: The Runaway Rainbow
|THQ
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Emerald
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] FireRed
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] LeafGreen
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Pinball: Ruby & Sapphire
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Ruby
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Sapphire
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Sega Smash Pack
|Sega
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Advance
|Sega
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Advance 2
|Sega
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Advance 3
|Sega
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Battle
|Sega
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Pinball Party
|Sega
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog Genesis
|Sega
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Super Mario Advance
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Super Mario World: Super Mario Advance 2
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Tetris Worlds
|THQ
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''The Three Stooges
|Cinemaware
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Wario Land 4
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''WarioWare Inc. Mega Microgame$
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''WarioWare Twisted
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Yoshi's Island: Super Mario Advance 3
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''Yoshi Topsy-Turvy
|Nintendo
|Game Boy Advance
|
|-
|''All Grown Up! Volume 1
|Nickelodeon
|GBA Video
|
|-
|''Cartoon Network Collection: Limited Edition
|Cartoon Network
|GBA Video
|
|-
|''Cartoon Network Collection: Platinum Edition
|Cartoon Network
|GBA Video
|
|-
|''Cartoon Network Collection: Premium Edition
|Cartoon Network
|GBA Video
|Chris’s 100th acquisition for Nintendo handhelds
|-
|''Cartoon Network Collection: Special Edition
|Cartoon Network
|GBA Video
|
|-
|''Cartoon Network Collection: Volume 1
|Cartoon Network
|GBA Video
|
|-
|''The Fairly Oddparents: Volume 1
|Nickelodeon
|GBA Video
|
|-
|''Nicktoons Collection: Volume 1
| Nickelodeon
|GBA Video
|
|-
|''Nicktoons Collection: Volume 2
| Nickelodeon
|GBA Video
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] GBAVideo: Beach Blank-Out Blastoise
|Nintendo
|GBA Video
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] GBAVideo: For Ho-Oh the Bells Toll!
|Nintendo
|GBA Video
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] GBAVideo: I Choose You!
|Nintendo
|GBA Video
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] GBAVideo: Johto Photo Finish
|Nintendo
|GBA Video
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] X Volume 1: A Super Sonic Hero!
|Sega
|GBA Video
|
|-
|''Amazing Island
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Animal Crossing]]
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''[[Chris and sex|BMX XXX]]
|Acclaim
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Dance Dance Revolution Mario Mix
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Donkey Konga
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Donkey Konga 2
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Donkey Kong Jungle Beat
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|Chris’s 50th acquisition for the Gamecube
|-
|''Evolution Worlds
|Ubisoft
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''F-Zero GX
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Go! Go! Hypergrind
|Atlus
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Karaoke Revolution Party
|Konami
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''The Legend of Zelda Collector's Edition
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time/Master Quest
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Luigi's Mansion
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Mario Kart: Double Dash!!
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Mario Kart: Double Dash!! Bonus Disc
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:MC_Groovz_Dance_Craze|MC Groovz Dance Craze]]
|MadCatz
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Mario Party 5
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Mario Party 7
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Metroid Prime
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Metroid Prime 2: Echoes
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Metroid Prime 2: Echoes Bonus Disc
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Pac-Man Vs.
|Namco
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Pac-Man World 2
|Namco
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Box: Ruby & Sapphire
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Colosseum
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Colosseum Bonus Disc
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] XD: Gale of Darkness
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''The Powerpuff Girls: Relish Rampage [[Pickle|Pickled]] Edition
|Warner Brothers
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Shadow the Hedgehog]]
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Adventure 2: Battle
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Adventure DX: Director's Cut
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Gems Collection
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Heroes
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Mega Collection
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Riders
|Sega
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Soul Calibur]] II
|Namco
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Spider-Man
|Activision
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Spyro: A Hero's Tail
|Universal Interactive
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Star Fox Adventures
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Star Wars Rogue Leader: Rogue Squadron 2
|LucasArts
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Star Wars Rogue Squadron 3: Rebel Strike
|LucasArts
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Super Mario Sunshine
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Super Smash Bros. Melee
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''WarioWare Inc.: Mega Party Game$!
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|''Wave Race: Blue Storm
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Gamecube
|
|-
|'''''[[Animal Crossing]] Wild World
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Big Brain Academy
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Brain Age
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|Chris’s 150th acquisition for Nintendo handhelds
|-
|''Cooking Mama
|Majesco
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Drill Dozer
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''[[Love_quest|Feel the Magic XY/XX]]
|Sega
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Fire Emblem: Shadow Dragon
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Futari wa Pretty Cure Max Heart Danzen! DS
|Bandai
|Nintendo DS
|A Japanese import
|-
|''Game & Watch Collection
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi
|THQ
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Jump Superstars
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|A Japanese import
|
|-
|''Kirby: Canvas Curse
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Magnetica
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Mario Hoops 3-on-3
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Mario Kart DS
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Mario Vs. Donkey Kong 2
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Metroid Prime: Hunters
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Metroid Prime: Hunters First Hunt
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|A demo cartridge
|
|-
|''Metroid Prime Pinball
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''New Super Mario Bros.
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Nintendogs: Dachshund & Friends
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Dash
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Diamond
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Mystery Dungeon Blue Rescue Team
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Pearl
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Ranger
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Trozei!
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Polarium|Polarium]]
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Retro Atari Classics
|Atari
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''The Rub Rabbits
|Sega
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Snood 2: On Vacation
|DSI
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Rush
|Sega
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Rush Adventure
|Sega
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Sprung]]
|Ubisoft
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Star Fox Command
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Sudoku Gridmaster
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Super Mario 64 DS
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Super Princess Peach
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''Tetris DS
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''True Swing Golf
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|''WarioWare Touched
|Nintendo
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] Nightmare Troubadour
|Konami
|Nintendo DS
|
|-
|'''''[[Animal Crossing]] City Folk
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Battalion Wars 2
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Dr. Mario Online RX
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Elebits
|Konami
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Family Table Tennis
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Link's Crossbow Training
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Mario Kart
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Mario Super Sluggers
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Metroid Prime 3 Corruption
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|'''''My [[Pokémon]] Ranch
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''NiGHTs: Journey of Dreams
|Sega
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|'''''[[Pokémon]] Battle Revolution
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''SNK Arcade Classics Volume 1
|SNK
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] & Mario at the Olympic Games
|Nintendo/Sega
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] and the Secret Rings
|Sega
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Chaos
|Sega
|Nintendo Wii
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Riders: Zero Gravity
|Sega
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|'''''[[Soul Calibur]] Legends
|Namco Bandai Games
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Space Invaders Get Even
|Square Enix
|Nintendo Wii
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Super Mario Galaxy
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Super Smash Bros. Brawl
|Nintendo/Sega
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Wario Land: Shake It!
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Wii Music
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Wii Play
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''Wii Sports
|Nintendo
|Nintendo Wii
|
|-
|''World of Goo
|2D Boy
|Nintendo Wii
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Bonk's Adventure''
|Hudson
|TurboGrafx-16
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Wonder Boy''
|Sega
|Sega Master System
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Alien Soldier''
|Nintendo
|Sega Genesis
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|''Bubsy
|Accolade
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''Desert Strike
|Electronic Arts
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''Fantasia
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''Genesis 6-Pak
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''Kid Chameleon
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Klax_(video_game)|Klax]]
|Tengen
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''Monopoly
|Parker Brothers
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''Ms. Pac Man
|Tengen
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''Rocket Knight Adventures
|Konami
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] & [[Punchy_Sonichu|Knuckles]]
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] 3-D Blast
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|A digital download for the Nintendo Wii
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog 2
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog 3
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Spinball
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''[[Sex toys|Toy Story]]
|Disney Interactive
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''X-Men
|Sega
|Sega Genesis
|
|-
|''The Chessmaster
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|''Columns
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|''Desert Speedtrap Starring Road Runner & Wile E. Coyote
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|''Krusty’s Fun House
|Flying Edge
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|''Quest for the Shaven Yak Starring Ren & Stimpy
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Drift 2
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog 2
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog Chaos
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] the Hedgehog Triple Trouble
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|''Super Columns
|Sega
|Sega Game Gear
|
|-
|''Batman Returns
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Double Switch
|Digital Pictures
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Ecco: The Tides of Time
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Flashback: [[Category:Liquid_Saga|The Quest for Identity]]
|U.S. Gold
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Jaguar XJ220
|JVC
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Jurassic Park
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Mad Dog McCree
|American Laser Games
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''[[Power_Rangers|Mighty Morphin Power Rangers]]
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Night Trap
|Digital Pictures
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Power Factory Featuring C+C Music Factory
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Sega Classics Arcade Collection
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Sewer_Shark|Sewer Shark]]
|Sony Imagesoft
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Sherlock Holmes: Consulting Detective
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] CD
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Star Wars: Rebel Assault
|LucasArts
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Time Gal
|Renovation
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Tomcat Alley
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''Wirehead
|Sega
|Sega CD
|
|-
|''B.C. Racers
|Front Street Publishing
|Sega 32X
|
|-
|''Cosmic Carnage
|Sega
|Sega 32X
|
|-
|''[[Punchy_Sonichu|Knuckles]] Chaotix
|Sega
|Sega 32X
|
|-
|''[[I_AM_STRONG|Toughman Contest]]
|Electronic Arts
|Sega 32X
|
|-
|''Virtua Fighter
|Sega
|Sega 32X
|
|-
|''Virtua Racing Deluxe
|Sega
|Sega 32X
|
|-
|''Baku Baku
|Sega
|Sega Saturn
|
|-
|''Battle Arena Toshinden URA
|Sega
|Sega Saturn
|
|-
|''Fighters Megamix
|Sega
|Sega Saturn
|
|-
|''NiGHTs into Dreams
|Sega
|Sega Saturn
|
|-
|''[[Sonic]] 3-D Blast
|Sega
|Sega Saturn
|
|-
|''[[Sonic]] R
|Sega
|Sega Saturn
|
|-
|''Virtua Fighter Remix
|Sega
|Sega Saturn
|
|-
|''Bleem! *Gran Turismo 2*
|Bleem
|Sega Dreamcast
|An emulation disc for the PlayStation ''GT2''
|-
|''Chu Chu Rocket
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Crazy Taxi
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Evolution
|Ubisoft
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Evolution 2
|Ubisoft
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Jet Grind Radio
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Marvel Vs. Capcom
|Capcom
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''The Next Tetris
|Crave
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Q*Bert
|Atari
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''[[List_of_cards_from_The_Wall_of_Originals#Espanolic|Samba de Amigo]]
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Sega Dreamcast Generator D.1
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Sega Smash Pack V.1
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Skies of Arcadia
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Adventure
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Adventure 2
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Shuffle
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|'''''[[South Park]]: Chef's Luv Shack
|Acclaim
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Space Channel 5
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Super Magnetic Neo
|Crave
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Suzuki Alstare Extreme Racing
|Ubisoft
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Time Stalkers
|Sega
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Tomb Raider: The Last Revelation
|Eidos Interactive
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Virtual-On Oratorio Tangram
|Activision
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''Wetrix +
|XICAT
|Sega Dreamcast
|
|-
|''2Xtreme
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Activision Classics
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Amazing Virtual Sea-Monkies, The
|Conspiracy
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Arcade's Greatest Hits - The Midway Collection 2
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Atari Anniversary Edition Redux
|Atari
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Battle Arena Toshinden
|Takara
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|'''''Beast Wars [[Transformers]]
|Hasbro
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Blaster Master: Blasting Again
|Crave
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Bowling
|A1 Games
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|
|-
|''Bloody Roar
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|
|-
|''Bubsy 3D
|Accolade
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Casper: Friends Around the World
|Sound Source
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Castlevania Chronicles
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Cool Boarders
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Cool Boarders 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Cool Boarders 3
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Cool Boarders 4
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Crash Bandicoot
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Crash Bandicoot 3 Warped
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A physical copy
|-
|''Crash Bandicoot 3 Warped
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Crash Bash
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Danger Girl
|THQ
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Dead in the Water
|ASC Games
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Defcon 5
|Data East
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Destruction Derby
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Dragon Ball GT: Final Bout
|Atari
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''[[Dragon Ball Z]]: Ultimate Battle 22
|Infogrames
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Final Fantasy VII
|Square Enix
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Ford Racing
|Empire Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Frogger
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Gran Turismo
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Gran Turismo 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Gundam Battle Assault 2
|Bandai
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''[[Plush Breasts|Hooters:]] Road Trip
|Ubisoft
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Hot Shots Golf 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Jet Moto
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Jet Moto 2
|989 Studios
|Sony PlayStation
|A physical copy
|-
|''Jet Moto 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Jet Moto 3
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Jumping Flash!
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''King of Fighters ‘99
|SNK
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Klonoa: Door to Phantomile
|Namco
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Lego Island 2: The Brickster's Revenge
|Lego Media
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Loaded
|Interplay
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Medal of Honor
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Medal of Honor Underground
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Medievil
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Mega Man Legends
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|'''''[[Metal Gear Solid]]
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Miracle Space Race
|Mud Duck
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Mobile Light Force
|XS Games
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Mortal Kombat 4
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation
|Chris’s 25th acquisition for the PlayStation
|-
|''MTV Music Generator
|Codemasters
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Need For Speed: High Stakes
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Need For Speed III: Hot Pursuit
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|[[Obesity|Pizza Hut]] Sampler Disc 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Pooh's]] Party Game: In Search of the Treasure
|Disney
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''PlayStation Underground Jampack 1
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''PlayStation Underground Jampack Summer 2000
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''PlayStation Underground Jampack Winter 2000
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Porsche Challenge
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''The Powerpuff Girls: Chemical X-Traction
|Warner Brothers
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Puzzle Star Sweep
|A1 Games
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Rally Cross
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Rayman
|Ubisoft
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Rayman 2: The Great Escape
|Ubisoft
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Resident Evil: Director's Cut
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation
|A physical copy
|-
|''Resident Evil: Director’s Cut
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Resident Evil 3: Nemesis
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation
|A demo disc
|-
|''R-Types
|Agetec
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''R-Type Delta
|Agetec
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''SimCity 2000
|Maxis
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Small Soldiers
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation
|Chris’s 50th acquisition for the PlayStation
|-
|''SnoCross Championship Racing
|Crave Entertainment
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Space Jam
|Acclaim
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Spec Ops: Airborne Commando
|Take-Two Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Spec Ops: Covert Assault
|Take-Two Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Spec Ops: Ranger Elite
|Take-Two Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Spec Ops: Stealth Patrol
|Take-Two Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Speed Racer
|Jaleco
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''[[Homo|Spice World]]
|Psygnosis
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Spyro the Dragon
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A physical copy
|-
|''Spyro the Dragon
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Spyro 2: Ripto's Rage
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Spyro: Year of the Dragon
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Star Wars Episode I: Jedi Power Battles
|LucasArts
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Street Fighter Alpha
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Street Fighter Alpha 2
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Suikoden
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Superstar Dance Club: #1 Hits
|XS Games
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Syphon Filter
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Syphon Filter 3
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Ten Pin Alley
|ASC Games
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Tekken 2
|Namco
|Sony PlayStation
|A physical copy
|-
|''Tekken 2
|Namco
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Tom Clancy’s Rainbow Six
|Ubisoft
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Tomb Raider
|Eidos Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Tomb Raider II
|Eidos Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A physical copy
|-
|''Tomb Raider II
|Eidos Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Toy Story 2
|Disney Interactive
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Twisted Metal 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Um Jammer Lammy
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Vandal Hearts
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''V.I.P.
|Ubisoft
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Vigilante 8: 2nd Offense
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''Warhawk
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Wild Arms
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Wild Arms 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|''Williams Arcade's Greatest Hits
|Williams
|Sony PlayStation
|
|-
|''XS Junior League Soccer
|XS Games
|Sony PlayStation
|A digital version for PS3/PSP
|-
|Official PlayStation Magazine Disc 105
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|Official PlayStation Magazine Disc 106
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|Official PlayStation Magazine Disc 107
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|Official PlayStation Magazine Disc 108
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|Official PlayStation Magazine Disc 109
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|Official PlayStation Magazine Disc 110
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|Official PlayStation Magazine Disc 111
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|Official PlayStation Magazine Disc 112
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Aeon Flux
|Majesco
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Aqua Teen Hunger Force - Zombie Ninja Pro-Am
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''[[Britney Spears|Britney's]] Dance Beat
|THQ
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Crash Nitro Kart
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Crash Tag Team Racing
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Crash Twinsanity
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Dance Dance Revolution Extreme
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Dark Cloud
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''EyeToy Play
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|'''''[[Family Guy]]
|2K/Fox
|Sony PlayStation 2
|Chris’s 25th acquisition for the PlayStation 2
|-
|''Fatal Frame
|Tecmo
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Grand Theft Auto 3
|Rockstar Games
|Sony Playstation 2
|Attempted to sell on [[ebay]].
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]]
|Red Octane
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] II
|Red Octane
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] Encore - Rocks The 80s
|Red Octane
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''The Guy Game
|Gathering
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''InuYasha: The Secret of the Cursed Mask
|Bandai
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Jak X: Combat Racing
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Jampack Volume 10
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Jampack Volume 11
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Jampack Volume 14
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Karaoke Revolution Volume 3
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Kingdom Hearts
|Square Enix
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Klonoa 2: Lunatea's Veil
|Namco
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Marc_Eck%C5%8D%27s_Getting_Up:_Contents_Under_Pressure|Marc Ecko's Getting Up: Contents Under Pressure]]
|Atari
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''[[John's Custom Gundam: Sisterly Rescue|Mobile Suit Gundam: Journey to Jaburo]]
|Bandai
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|'''''[[PaRappa the Rapper]] 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|PSUnderground Summer Sampler
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Sega Superstars
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Mega Collection Plus
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|'''''[[Soul Calibur]] II
|Namco
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|'''''[[Soul Calibur]] III
|Bandai/Namco
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Space Channel 5: Special Edition
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Taiko Drum Master
|Namco
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Tekken Tag Tournament
|Namco
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|'''''[[Transformers]]
|Atari
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Unreal Tournament
|Infogrames
|Sony PlayStation 2
|
|-
|''Age of Booty
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Aquatopia
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Armored Core 4
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Astro Tripper
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Bionic Commando Rearmed
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Bioshock
|2K Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $10 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Blast Factor
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $8 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Braid
|Number None
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Brain Challenge
|Gameloft
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $3 spent on DLC.
|-
|'''''[[Brutal Legend|Brütal Legend]]'''''
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Chris's 50th physical acquisition for the PS3.
|-
|''Burn Zombie Burn
|Pinnacle
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Burnout Paradise
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $67 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Buzz!: Quiz TV
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $31 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Buzz! Junior: RoboJam
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Calling All Cars
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Championship Sprint
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Critter Crunch
|Capybara Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Dark Sector
|D3 Publisher
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Dead Space
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $4 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Disgaea 3: Absence of Justice
|NIS America
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $65 spent on DLC.
|-
|''[[Dragon Ball Z]]: Burst Limit
|Atari
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Droplitz
|Atlus
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''echochrome
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
|Bethesda
|Sony PlayStation 3
|"Game of the Year Edition"
|-
|''Elefunk
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Enchanted Arms
|Ubisoft
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[The Eye of Judgement]]
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $20 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Fairytale Fights
|Playlogic
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''flOw
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $3 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Flower
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Folklore
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Fret Nice
|Tecmo
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Frogger Returns
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''[[wikipedia:Giant Enemy Crab|Genji: Days of the Blade]]
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Go! Puzzle
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $3 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Go! Sports Ski
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Go! Sports Skydiving
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|-
|''Go! Sudoku
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $12 spent on DLC.
|-
|'''''[[God of War]] III
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''God of War Collection
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Gravity Crash
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''GripShift v2.0
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Gauntlet II
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] 3: Legends of Rock
|Red Octane
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] 5
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] Aerosmith
|Red Octane
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] Hits
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] Metallica
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] Van Halen
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[Guitar Hero]] World Tour
|Red Octane
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Gunstar Heroes
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Hail to the Chimp
|Gamecock
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Heavenly Sword
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Heavy Rain
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''High Stakes: Poker Edition
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''High Velocity Bowling
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $18 spent on DLC.
|-
|''inFamous
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Invincible Tiger: The Legend of Han Tao
|Namco Bandai Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Jeopardy!
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Joust
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Killzone 2
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $6 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Lair
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''The Last Guy
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $2 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Lego Star Wars: The Complete Saga
|Lego Media
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust
|Funsta
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Lemmings
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Linger in Shadows
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|'''''[[LittleBigPlanet]]
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $98 spent on DLC.
|-
|''LocoRoco Cocoreccho!
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Mainichi Issho
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Marvel Vs. Capcom 2
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Marvel Ultimate Alliance
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Mega Man 9
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Mega Man 10
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Mesmerize
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $4 spent on DLC.
|-
|''[[Sonichu%27s_Edge|Mirror's Edge]]
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Mobile Suit Gundam: Crossfire
|Bandai Namco Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Monster Madness: Grave Danger
|South Peak Interactive
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Mortal Kombat II
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Motorstorm
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $19 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Namco Museum Essentials
|Bandai Namco Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Noby Noby Boy
|Bandai Namco Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Novastrike
|Tiki Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Nucleus
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''PAIN
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $41 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Penny Arcade Adventures: On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness, Episode One
|Hothead Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Penny Arcade Adventures: On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness, Episode Two
|Hothead Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''PixelJunk Eden Encore
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $9 spent on DLC.
|-
|''PixelJunk Monsters Encore
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $9 spent on DLC.
|-
|''PixelJunk Racers
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''PixelJunk Shooter
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Piyotama
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Q*Bert v2.0
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Rag Doll Kung Fu: Fists of Plastic
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Rampage
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Rampart
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Ratchet & Clank Future: Tools of Destruction
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Ratchet & Clank Future: Quest for Booty
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Resistance: Fall of Man
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Chris’s 25th acquisition for the PlayStation 3
|-
|''Rock Band
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Rock Band 2
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Rock Revolution
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Sam & Max: The Devil's Playhouse - Episode 1: The Penal Zone
|Telltale Games
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''SAW
|Konami
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Sega Superstars Tennis
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''The Simpsons Game
|Electronic Arts
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Siren: Blood Curse
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Snakeball
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $2 spent on DLC.
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] The Hedgehog
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $7.50 spent on DLC.
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Unleashed
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $18 spent on DLC.
|-
|''[[Sonic]]'s Ultimate Genesis Collection
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[Soul Calibur]] IV
|Bandai/Namco
|Sony PlayStation 3
|"Premium edition"; approximately $33.50 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Spider-Man 3
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|"Collector’s edition"
|-
|''Stranglehold
|Midway
|Sony PlayStation 3
|"Collector’s edition"; approximately $15 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Street Fighter IV
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $20 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Stuntman Ignition
|THQ
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Super Puzzle Fighter II Turbo HD Remix
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Super [[Mass_debating|Rub a Dub]]
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Super Stardust HD
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $10 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Super Street Fighter II Turbo HD Remix
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Super Street Fighter IV
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Supersonic Acrobatic Rocket-Powered Battle-Cars
|Psyonix
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Tekken 5: Dark Resurrection
|Namco
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $10 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Timeshift
|Sierra
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Toy Home
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $7 spent on DLC.
|-
|'''''[[Transformers]] - The Game
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|'''''[[Transformers]]: Revenge of the Fallen
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $10 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Trash Panic
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Uncharted: Drake's Fortune
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''UNO
|Gameloft
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Untold Legends: Dark Kingdom
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Virtua Fighter 5
|Sega
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Warhawk
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Approximately $19 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Watchmen: The End is Nigh
|Warner Bros.
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Watchmen: The End is Nigh Part 2
|Warner Bros.
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Wheel of Fortune
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''WipEout HD
|Sony
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Wolf of the Battlefield: Commando 3
|Capcom
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Wolfenstein 3D
|Activision
|Sony PlayStation 3
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''X-Blades
|Ubisoft
|Sony PlayStation 3
|
|-
|''Ape Escape Academy
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Ape Escape ~ On the Loose
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Ape Quest
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Armored Core: Formula Front - Extreme Battle
|Agetec
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''ATV Offroad Fury - Blazin' Trails
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''ATV Offroad Fury Pro
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|A demo disc
|-
|''Beats
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-

|''Brain Challenge
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-

|''[[Fuck_quest|Brooktown High]]
|Konami
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Bust-A-Move Deluxe
|Majesco
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''BUZZ! Master Quiz
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Carol Vorderman's Sudoku
|Secret Stash
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Crash Tag Team Racing
|Universal Interactive
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Darkstalkers Chronicle - The Chaos Tower
|Capcom
|Sony PSP
|Chris's 50th acquisition for the PSP.
|-
|''Daxter
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''echochrome
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]; approximately $5 spent on DLC.
|-
|''Every Extend Extra
|BVG
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''EXIT
|Ubisoft
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Frogger: Helmet Chaos
|Konami
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Gangs of London
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Gangs Of London
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|A demo disc
|-
|''Go! Sudoku
|Ubisoft
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|'''''God of War - Chains of Olympus
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|'''''God of War - Chains of Olympus Special Edition: Battle of Attica
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|A demo disc
|-
|''Gripshift
|Red Mile
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Guilty Gear Judgement
|Majesco
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Gunpey
|Bandai Namco Games
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Gurumin - A Monstrous Adventure
|Mastiff Games
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''[[Harvey Birdman Commercial|Harvey Birdman]] - Attorney At Law
|Capcom
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Hot Pixel
|Atari
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Infected
|Majesco
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Killzone Liberation
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Killzone Liberation
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|A demo disc
|-
|''Kingdom of Paradise
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Lego Stars Wars II: The Original Trilogy
|Lego Media
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|'''''[[LittleBigPlanet]]
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Locoroco
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Lumines II
|BVG
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Mercury Meltdown
|Ignition
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Mind Quiz
| Ubisoft
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''MLB 07: The Show
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|A demo disc
|-
|''Mobile Suit Gundam - Battle Royale
|Bandai Namco Games
|Sony PSP
|A Japanese import
|-
|'''''[[PaRappa the Rapper]]
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Patapon
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Patapon
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|A demo disc
|-
|''PQ Practical Intelligence Quotient
|D3
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Puzzle Challenge Crosswords and More
|Crave
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Ratchet & Clank: Size Matters
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Sampler Disc for PSP Vol.1
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Sega Genesis Collection
|Sega
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Snoopy Vs. the Red Baron
|Bandai Namco Games
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''SOCOM U.S. Navy SEALs Fireteam Bravo
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Rivals
|Sega
|Sony PSP
|Chris's 25th acquisition for the PSP.
|-
|'''''[[Sonic]] Rivals 2
|Sega
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Space Invaders Extreme
|Taito
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Syphon Filter: Combat Ops
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|Downloaded via the [[PlayStation Network]]
|-
|''Syphon Filter: Logan's Shadow
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|A demo disc
|-
|''Tekken: Dark Resurrection
|Bandai Namco Games
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''The Con
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|'''''[[Transformers]] - The Game
|Activision
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Ultimate Block Party
|Conspiracy
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Wipeout Pure
|Sony
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''WTF: Work Time Fun
|D3
|Sony PSP
|
|-
|''Ah! My Goddess the Movie
|Geneon
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Creature Comforts: The Complete First Season
|Sony
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|'''''[[Family Guy]]: Freakin' Sweet Collection
|Fox
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
|Sony
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Fun with [[Duck|Dick]] and Jane
|Columbia
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Into the Blue
|MGM
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Lords Of Dogtown
|Columbia
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''National Lampoon's Animal House
|Universal
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Saturday Night Live Collection - The Best of Chris Farley
|Lions Gate
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|'''''[[South Park]] ~ When Technology Attacks!
|Comedy Central
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Spider-Man New Animated Series The Mutant Menace
|Marvel
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Spider-Man 2 UMD Movie
|Columbia
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''STEALTH
|Columbia
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Superbad: Unrated Extended Edition
|Columbia
|UMD Movie
|
|-
|''Wedding Crashers: Uncorked Edition
|New Line
|UMD Movie
|
|}

==See also==
*[[List of Chris's Blu-ray discs]]
*[[Miyamoto Saga]]
*''[[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles]]''
*''[[Sonichu Advance]]''
*''[[Sonichu Adventure]]''
*[[Video games]]

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?mdn5wamumtv The Excel file]
*[http://outerheaven.pastebin.com/f277fb9e2 Purchases from May 7th onward]

{{Lists}}

[[Category:Lists]]
[[Category:Video Games]]