CWCki - User contributions [en]

The Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail

2010-12-26T04:21:40Z

VladVincent: /* Gallery */

'''The Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail''' was introduced in [[Sub-Episode 7]] of [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]], wherein Chris fellated a beverage whilst evading [[jerkop]]s. Numerous [[Trolls]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] pointed out that the clumsy artwork make it look like Chris was sucking on a big, fat phallus, playing on his deeply-rooted fear of becoming a [[homo]]. In the version posted on [[CWCipedia]], Chris has edited the Oversized Drinking Straw to look slightly less retarded:

[[Image:Chris-Straw-Retcon.JPG|center]]

It's worth noting that even the "new, improved" Drinking Straw is wider than any of cartoon Chris-chan's fingers or thumbs, and the part above the bend is for some reason narrower than the part below. Also, given the nature of Chris's terrible artwork, it's hard to determine which of the following is correct about his "new" mouth...

'''1> ''Is his mouth wide open?'''''
:If this is the case, it would be impossible to drink in the manner depicted. The drinker's lips have to form an airtight seal around the straw in order to draw liquid up through it, unless you have vacuum lungs.

'''2> ''Has he drawn himself with massive [[niggo]] lips?'''''
:Chris's lips may have simply ballooned to an enormous size, giving the impression that he's wearing lipstick now.

Whatever the truth may be, Chris cannot even correct any of his mistakes without finding some other way to screw up in the process.

==Gallery==

<center><gallery>
Image:Straw.jpg|Like father, like son.
Image:SWEETHEARTS.jpeg|GENTLEMEN.
Image:Slurp1.png|Slurp.
Image:Slurp2.jpg|SLURP!
Image:PVCC_44.png|
Image:Paulyslurp.jpg|It's true - the straw has its own fan art devotees.
Image:RobotnikStraw of Fail.jpg|Possible inspiration?
Image:Asperstraw.png|''[[Asperchu]]'' variant.
Image:Freudslipstraw.png| Could the straw be a euphemism for Chris' own bent [[duck]]?
Image:ChrisVSstrawcanvaspainting.jpg|Serious skills.
</gallery></center>

==See also==

*[[Get-Tar Region]]
*[[Sonichu 8]]
*[[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu]]
*[[Chris and Art]]
{{DEFAULTSORT:Oversized Drinking Straw}}
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]

File:ChrisVSstrawcanvaspainting.jpg

2010-12-26T04:20:25Z

VladVincent: New picture--hand-painted. Sauce: http://captainseby.deviantart.com/art/Chris-vs-Straw-189527292

New picture--hand-painted.

Sauce: http://captainseby.deviantart.com/art/Chris-vs-Straw-189527292

User:VladVincent

2010-11-30T23:54:58Z

VladVincent: .

100 2357.MOV

2010-11-30T23:52:55Z

VladVincent: Undo revision 127689 by Trueandhonest (talk) Is that you, Chris?

'''100 2357.MOV''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 22 [[November 2010]]. For the sixth time, Chris announces he is to [[Internet#Attempts_to_leave_the_Internet|leave the Internet]]. Chris also removed all his other [[YouTube]] videos around the time this one was uploaded. His [[Pedo-glasses|glasses]] have still not been replaced or repaired properly. More likely than not, he'll be back soon. In fact, Chris has logged back onto his YouTube account multiple times since uploading the video. The first time was a mere two days after issuing this proclamation. This is not surprising, as our good friend Christian has failed to successfully leave the Internet not once, not twice, not three times, not four times, but five times. Maybe the sixth time is a charm? Given his history, it is rather doubtful. Only time will tell...

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100_2357.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|eQqO3kFaV2w}}
| stardate = 22 [[November 2010]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Rage|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{GreenWideLinesShirt|text}}
| previous = [[100 2278]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===

Attention! Read my lips!

Online socialization... is a [[Muscle_bra|bust]]. [[Chris_and_English|Socializin' in real life]] is the tops.

And also: NO MORE VIDEOS!

Fuck you most ''[displays middle finger]'' and fuck you ''[shows other middle finger]'', social sites like [[MySpace]] and [[Facebook]]!

[''[[Pedo-glasses#Dramatic_glasses_removal|whips off his glasses and shakes out his hair]]'']

I'm out. ''[turns off the camera]''

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100_2278]]|nextlink=Current}}

{{Videos about leaving the Internet}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

100 2357.MOV

2010-11-22T20:19:48Z

VladVincent: /* Transcript */

{{recent}}
'''100 2357.MOV''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 22 [[November 2010]]. Once again, Chris announces he is to leave the [[internet]]. Chris also removed all his other [[YouTube]] videos around the time this one was uploaded. The [[Pedo-glasses|glasses]] have still not been replaced, once again proving that [[Chris and fashion|fashion]] is not important to Chris even if it may lead to [[China]].

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100_2357.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|eQqO3kFaV2w}}
| stardate = 22 [[November 2010]]
| subject = {{Website|Internet}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Rage|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{GreenWideLinesShirt|text}}
| previous = [[100 2278]]
| next = Current
}}

===Transcript===

Attention: Read my lips.

Online socialization is a bust. Socialize in real life is the tops.

And also: NO MORE VIDEOS!

Fuck you most ''[displays middle finger]'' and fuck you ''[shows other middle finger]'' social sites like Myspace and Facebook.

[''[[Pedo-glasses|dramatic glasses removal, shaking head]]'']

I'm out.

''[Camera turns off]''

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2278]]|nextlink=Current}}

{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Lars Call

2010-11-07T04:10:07Z

VladVincent: /* Summary */

[[Image:Lars.jpg|thumb|Lars, with boat]]
{{quote|The fuck that shit be??|[[Lars]], questioning on what [[autism]] is}}
The '''Lars Call''' is a ninety-minute phone conversation where Chris discusses with [[Jackie]]'s ex-boyfriend [[Lars]] addictions, a parade he promised Jackie, what he would do for a woman, and boats. Chris gets comfortable with ebonics, and hilarity ensues.

==Summary==
* Jackie had an involuntary abortion thanks to Lars
* Lars getting rid of his boats, Chris gets rid of his [[Lego|Legos]]
* Lars didn't finish school because people played [[Kick the Autistic|Kick the Nigga]]
* Lars doesn't understand [[autism]], after Chris's explanation, he thought it was [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger's]] and Down Syndrome
* Chris whines about trolls, not getting a job, and being called a [[homo]]. Lars hears him
* Chris doesn't like when people say "[[gay]]" [[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC#Transcript|as in stupid]], Lars doesn't like when people say "nigga" out of context
* [[Sonichu]] (didn't see that coming), Chris incorporates IRL enemies. Lars tells him to continue the comic in order to conquer the trolls
* Lars says Jackie is upset because she isn't an inspiration for Chris to do the comic, and he sometimes doesn't do what he tells her he will.
* Chris tells Lars he's a [[virgin]], Lars says that explains his rage against the trolls.
* Chris rewrites the comic so he doesn't kill "[[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Nigga]]"
* Jackie better not burn that casserole.
* Chris promised a parade for Alec to Jackie, Chris denies it, Lars has the [[Jackie_E-mails_20|e-mail proving]] he did.
* Jackie initially broke up with Lars because he told her he'd lose the boats, and he didn't. Chris feels him. Chris is Lars's Nigga
* Chris is willing to give up [[the Moon]] and Mercury if he had it, for Jackie. He's really giving up video games, but he won't sell his "[[PS3|PS Triple]]"
* Lars spent $35,000 on six credit cards for boats. He won't let addiction rule his life anymore
* Chris swears on the grave on his [[Aunt Corina]] he will not spend anymore on his PS3 (at least it wasn't [[Patti]])
* Lars spent 9 months as a volunteer at a hospital enjoying the sight of [[Bob|old white men]] dying
* More bitching about trolls.
* Lars and Chris talk about their criminal records, Lars makes trespassing sound bad ass
* Chris apparently turns into a nigga himself as about halfway in and speaks in Ebonics (off and on) the remainder of the call
* Chris would [[Death threats|shoot]] [[Michael Snyder]] if he had the chance. Michael was just looking for a reason to ban Chris
* Lars gives Chris a scenario of someone breaking in. Chris says he's strong and would kick their ass (only if they hit first)
* Chris likes Black people on TV. Lars gets mildly offended upon hearing how Chris likes "Sanford & Son". They both hold up their fists in solidarity.
* The conversation goes back to Jackie, they wonder why Jackie is mad at Chris.
* Chris claims that he will make things right
* Lars tells Chris that his dick is four inches of straight goodness
* Lars burned his boats because he wants Jackie back and suggested that Chris burn his PS3 to get Jackie back.
* Lars thinks he has the upper hand over Chris in the competition over Jackie. He was known as "Ram-rod" in High School
* Chris talks about his [[Cherokee]] heritage. He's not a "casino nigga" He beats the stereotype that Native Americans have jobs.
* Lars respects Chris trying to win Jackie back, while Lars is "[[Hanky-panky|ramrodding]]" her
* Chris talks about destroying his first PS3, Lars questions why he got a second one. Chris says he needs it as a computer. Lars asks why he didn't get a computer instead
* Lars tells Chris to improve himself whether Jackie stays with him or not.
* Jackie can't come to the phone, she's taking a massive shit courtesy of Taco Bell
* Chris whines that making changes is [[Autism|too hard]].
* Lars says Chris is afraid of women, Chris denies it
* Chris didn't have Taco Bell, he had a fish fillet for dinner.
* Lars lost his virginity at 10, he was scared.
* Lars tells Chris if he loses the PSTriple, his ass will be kicked out on the street and Jackie will be at Chris' doorstep the following day
* Lars concludes with the fist of solidarity, He will bang Jackie when she gets out of the bathroom.
* Chris promises [[Honest]]y to Lars, He wants Jackie '''AND''' video games
* Chris likes orange soda
* Lars didn't know what [[Wikipedia:Kenan & Kel|''Kenan & Kel'']] or Nickelodeon was, he goes to fuck Jackie.
* They say Goodnight

==Transcript==
{{transcription}}

==External links==
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?mzqbcbh007abn88 Download]
* [http://goo.gl/DbVDg Non-mediafire mirror]

[[Category:Phone calls]]
{{stub}}

Lars Call

2010-11-07T03:55:05Z

VladVincent:

[[Image:Lars.jpg|thumb|Lars, with boat]]
{{quote|The fuck that shit be??|[[Lars]], questioning on what [[autism]] is}}
The '''Lars Call''' is a ninety-minute phone conversation where Chris discusses with [[Jackie]]'s ex-boyfriend [[Lars]] addictions, a parade he promised Jackie, what he would do for a woman, and boats. Chris gets comfortable with ebonics, and hilarity ensues.

==Summary==
* Jackie had an involuntary abortion thanks to Lars
* Lars getting rid of his boats, Chris gets rid of his [[Lego|Legos]]
* Lars didn't finish school because people played [[Kick the Autistic|Kick the Nigga]]
* Lars doesn't understand [[autism]], after Chris's explanation, he thought it was [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger's]] and Down Syndrome
* Chris whines about trolls, not getting a job, and being called a [[homo]]. Lars hears him
* Chris doesn't like when people say "[[gay]]" [[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC#Transcript|as in stupid]], Lars doesn't like when people say "nigga" out of context
* [[Sonichu]] (didn't see that coming), Chris incorporates IRL enemies. Lars tells him to continue the comic in order to conquer the trolls
* Lars says Jackie is upset because she isn't an inspiration for Chris to do the comic, and he sometimes doesn't do what he tells her he will.
* Chris tells Lars he's a [[virgin]], Lars says that explains his rage against the trolls.
* Chris rewrites the comic so he doesn't kill "[[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Nigga]]"
* Jackie better not burn that casserole.
* Chris promised a parade for Alec to Jackie, Chris denies it, Lars has the [[Jackie_E-mails_20|e-mail proving]] he did.
* Jackie initially broke up with Lars because he told her he'd lose the boats, and he didn't. Chris feels him. Chris is Lars's Nigga
* Chris is willing to give up [[the Moon]] and Mercury if he had it, for Jackie. He's really giving up video games, but he won't sell his "[[PS3|PS Triple]]"
* Lars spent $35,000 on six credit cards for boats. He won't let addiction rule his life anymore
* Chris swears on the grave on his [[Aunt Corina]] he will not spend anymore on his PS3 (at least it wasn't [[Patti]])
* Lars spent 9 months as a volunteer at a hospital enjoying the sight of [[Bob|old white men]] dying
* More bitching about trolls.
* Lars and Chris talk about their criminal records, Lars makes trespassing sound bad ass
* Chris apparently turns into a nigga himself as about halfway in and speaks in Ebonics (off and on) the remainder of the call
* Chris would [[Death threats|shoot]] [[Michael Snyder]] if he had the chance. Michael was just looking for a reason to ban Chris
* Lars gives Chris a scenario of someone breaking in. Chris says he's strong and would kick their ass (only if they hit first)
* Chris likes Black people on TV. Lars gets mildly offended upon hearing how Chris likes "Sanford & Son". They both hold up their fists in solidarity.
* The conversation goes back to Jackie, they wonder why Jackie is mad at Chris.
* Chris claims that he will make things right
* Lars burned his boats because he wants Jackie back and suggested that Chris burn his PS3 to get Jackie back.
* Lars thinks he has the upper hand over Chris in the competition over Jackie. He was known as "Ram-rod" in High School
* Chris talks about his [[Cherokee]] heritage. He's not a "casino nigga" He beats the stereotype that Native Americans have jobs.
* Lars respects Chris trying to win Jackie back, while Lars is "[[Hanky-panky|ramrodding]]" her
* Chris talks about destroying his first PS3, Lars questions why he got a second one. Chris says he needs it as a computer. Lars asks why he didn't get a computer instead
* Lars tells Chris to improve himself whether Jackie stays with him or not.
* Jackie can't come to the phone, she's taking a massive shit courtesy of Taco Bell
* Chris whines that making changes is [[Autism|too hard]].
* Lars says Chris is afraid of women, Chris denies it
* Chris didn't have Taco Bell, he had a fish fillet for dinner.
* Lars lost his virginity at 10, he was scared.
* Lars tells Chris if he loses the PSTriple, his ass will be kicked out on the street and Jackie will be at Chris' doorstep the following day
* Lars concludes with the fist of solidarity, He will bang Jackie when she gets out of the bathroom.
* Chris promises [[Honest]]y to Lars, He wants Jackie '''AND''' video games
* Chris likes orange soda
* Lars didn't know what [[Wikipedia:Kenan & Kel|''Kenan & Kel'']] or Nickelodeon was, he goes to fuck Jackie.
* They say Goodnight
==Transcript==
{{transcription}}

==External links==
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?mzqbcbh007abn88 Download]
* [http://goo.gl/DbVDg Non-mediafire mirror]

[[Category:Phone calls]]
{{stub}}

Lars Call

2010-11-07T03:48:20Z

VladVincent: /* Summary */

[[Image:Lars.jpg|thumb|Lars, with boat]]
{{quote|The fuck that shit be??|[[Lars]], questioning on what [[autism]] is}}
The '''Lars Call''' is a ninety-minute phone conversation where Chris discusses with [[Jackie]]'s ex-boyfriend [[Lars]] addictions, a parade he promised Jackie, what he would do for a woman, and boats. Chris gets comfortable with ebonics, and hilarity ensues.

==Summary==
* Jackie had an involuntary abortion thanks to Lars
* Lars getting rid of his boats, Chris gets rid of his [[Lego|Legos]]
* Lars didn't finish school because people played [[Kick the Autistic|Kick the Nigga]]
* Lars doesn't understand [[autism]], after Chris's explanation, he thought it was [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger's]] and Down Syndrome
* Chris whines about trolls,not getting a job, and being called a [[homo]]. Lars hears him
* Chris doesn't like when people say "[[gay]]" [[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC#Transcript|as in stupid]], Lars doesn't like when people say "nigga" out of context
* [[Sonichu]] (didn't see that coming), Chris incorporates IRL enemies. Lars tells him to continue the comic in order to conquer the trolls
* Lars says Jackie is upset because she isn't an inspiration for Chris to do the comic, and he sometimes doesn't do what he tells her he will.
* Chris tells Lars he's a [[virgin]], Lars says that explains his rage against the trolls.
* Chris rewrites the comic so he doesn't kill "[[Alec Benson Leary|Alec Benson Nigga]]"
* Jackie better not burn that casserole.
* Chris promised a parade for Alec to Jackie, Chris denies it, Lars has the [[Jackie_E-mails_20|e-mail proving]] he did.
* Jackie initially broke up with Lars because he told her he'd lose the boats, and he didn't. Chris feels him. Chris is Lars's Nigga
* Chris is willing to give up [[the Moon]] and Mercury if he had it, for Jackie. He's really giving up video games, but he won't sell his "[[PS3|PS Triple]]"
* Lars spent $35,000 on six credit cards for boats. He won't let addiction rule his life anymore
* Chris swears on the grave on his [[Aunt Corina]] he will not spend anymore on his PS3 (at least it wasn't [[Patti]])
* Lars spent 9 months as a volunteer at a hospital enjoying the sight of [[Bob|old white men]] dying
* More bitching about trolls.
* Lars and Chris talk about their criminal records, Lars makes trespassing sound bad ass
* Chris apparently turns into a nigga himself as about halfway in and speaks in Ebonics (off and on) the remainder of the call
* Chris would [[Death threats|shoot]] [[Michael Snyder]] if he had the chance. Michael was just looking for a reason to ban Chris
* Lars gives Chris a scenario of someone breaking in. Chris says he's strong and would kick their ass (only if they hit first)
* Chris likes Black people on TV. Lars is mildly offended. They both hold up their fists in solidarity.
* The conversation goes back to Jackie, they wonder why Jackie is mad at Chris.
* Chris will make things right
* Lars burned his boats because he wants Jackie back and suggested that Chris burn his PS3 to get Jackie back.
* Lars thinks he has the upper hand over Chris in the competition over Jackie. He was known as "Ram-rod" in High School
* Chris talks about his [[Cherokee]] heritage. He's not a "casino nigga" He beats the stereotype that Native Americans have jobs.
* Lars respects Chris trying to win Jackie back, while Lars is "[[Hanky-panky|ramrodding]]" her
* Chris talks about destroying his first PS3, Lars questions why he got a second one. Chris says he needs it as a computer. Lars asks why he didn't get a computer instead
* Lars tells Chris to improve himself whether Jackie stays with him or not.
* Jackie can't come to the phone, she's taking a massive shit courtesy of Taco Bell
* Chris whines that making changes is [[Autism|too hard]].
* Lars says Chris is afraid of women, Chris denies it
* Chris didn't have Taco Bell, he had a fish fillet for dinner.
* Lars lost his virginity at 10, he was scared.
* Lars tells Chris if he loses the PSTriple, his ass will be kicked out on the street and Jackie will be at Chris' doorstep the following day
* Lars concludes with the fist of solidarity, He will bang Jackie when she gets out of the bathroom.
* Chris promises [[Honest]]y to Lars, He wants Jackie '''AND''' video games
* Chris likes orange soda
* Lars didn't know what [[Wikipedia:Kenan & Kel|''Kenan & Kel'']] or Nickelodeon was, he goes to fuck Jackie.
* They say Goodnight
==Transcript==
{{transcription}}

==External links==
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?mzqbcbh007abn88 Download]
* [http://goo.gl/DbVDg Non-mediafire mirror]

[[Category:Phone calls]]
{{stub}}

ECV 00002

2010-10-11T14:45:18Z

VladVincent: /* Fan videos */ Wrong month.

'''ECV 00002''' is a video uploaded on 11 [[October 2010]] in which [[Chris]] uses the power of [[Random Access Humor]] to transform into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|his Super-Mode]], presumably for [[Jackie]]. The [[Plush Breasts]] make a cameo appearance in this video. Chris also holds a [[PS3]] Navigation Controller in his left hand, though it once again appears to serve no purpose.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ECV 00002
| video = {{#ev:youtube|nt86Y5JW4ZI}}
| stardate = 11 [[October 2010]]
| subject =
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = {{RedYellowStripeShirt}} The Racing Stripe
| previous = [[A Hike]]
| next = Current
}}

=== Transcription ===
Hello, folks. Hm. Well, [[Monty Python|and now for something completely different]]. [[Electric hedgehog]] power PEW!

[''Chris [[Chris and camerawork|seamlessly]] transforms into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]]'']

Pew. [''Left ear falls off''] This would be me in my super mode! [''Chris puts his left ear back on''] If I actually had the super powers. [''Chris's left ear falls off yet again, but is put back in place''] [[Chris and reality|But I don't in real life.]] But I dressed up like this anyway, to, I don't know, [''The same ear falls off yet again, promptly readjusted''] just to say something or just to have fun.

Anyway, live an [[Honest content|honest life]], don't [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]], don't [[Chris_Drops_the_N-Bomb|badmouth people]]... It's just not cool. You know? Don't pic- don't torture me. At least I am doing this and I have myself a woman, [[Chris and his Ego|so there]]. So she'll appreciate this very much. She appreciates almo- everything I do for her. [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|Especially these videos]].

[[Jackie]], I [[love]] you. I want to hold you in my arms, [[sweetheart]]. You come over right on here and we'll [[Chris and sex|do each other]] right. [[Sex_tape|Sweet times]]...

[''Pause'']

Alright anyway, stay in school, stay well, um... you know, just live life peace- live peacefully. Don't take- don't [[Chris and anger|be angry at people]]. Don't be mean.

OK? A'right.

Take care.

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-chan Henshin
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MPeuSdTo0NI}}
| Maker = rba718
| Stardate = 10 October 2010
| Video Type =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = ELECTRIC HEDGEHOG POWER
| video = {{#ev:youtube|lDSQAmLPbw0}}
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]
| Stardate = 10 October 2010
| Video Type =
}}

==Fan art==

<center><gallery>
File:Hpowers.jpg|Electric furry powers!
File:128678188337.png
File:128677654690.jpg
</gallery></center>

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[A Hike]]|nextlink=Current}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

{{Sweetheart Videos}}