CWCki - User contributions [en]

User:Volodya

2011-09-10T17:35:33Z

Volodya:

My name is Vladimir and I apologize in advance for any English mistakes.

Привет!

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|info= '''Jew''' This user is a [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|JEW!]] Unlike [[Chris_and_race#Jews|Chris]], the CWCki likes Jewish people. <center>Mazel tov!</center>}}
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User:Volodya

2011-09-10T17:27:51Z

Volodya:

My name is Vladimir and I apologize in advance for any English mistakes.

Привет!

Talk:Bob Chandler

2011-09-10T17:27:28Z

Volodya: /* Changing tenses in the article */

==To do==
*<strike>Picture of Bob</strike>
**Bob looks like fucking Jigsaw. Scary. [[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 18:34, 7 February 2010 (UTC)
*Chris's relationship with Bob, in Chris's own words
*add some background to Bob's history. He goes on about himself in the date audio, and he's a pretty interesting guy, like he saw the first plastic Coke bottles shipped off from the assembly line, and he was in the Signal Corps and all sorts of other interesting stuff. We need some of that in here. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:06, 26 March 2009 (CET)

(Quick question - whats the date audio? Thanks!)
*...the audio of Chris's date with [[Emily]]. As seen available on the [[The Miscreants]] website. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:31, 17 April 2009 (CEST)

Should I mention he just got sent to the hospital in the health section with congestive heart failure? [[Shawths|Shawths]]

==Great job!==

Seriously, this article is terrific now. I'm surprised how far it's come. Good work to all those involved. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:11, 11 June 2009 (CEST)

: Still need more on video games and raising Chris. The section on Chris should be the biggest in this article. Will wait for others to finish transcribing because I can't make out Bob's quiet voice in church & Emily. [[User:Axe|Axe]] 10:24, 11 June 2009 (CEST)

== Bob's birthday ==

Why did everyone think it was Feb. 9th instead of Sept. 4? Does Chris not know when his father's birthday is? [[User:Sauerkraut131|Sauerkraut131]] 04:41, 27 June 2009 (CEST)
*No, it's just hard to tell from the Family Tree poster since it's in microscopic print. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:27, 27 June 2009 (CEST)

==Radio Station Gig==
According to some of the recordings via Yahoo Messenger, didn't Bob worked at a radio station at one time? [[User:Decoy Octillery|Decoy Octillery]] 21:01, 5 August 2009 (CEST)

==i suck==

Hi, first time editor, long time lurker. I called CWC's house today, hoping to talk to him, but I got Bob instead. Those other people exaggerated about Bob's bravado in their callfail video, Bob isn't much of an opponent if you don't let him get a word in, he just seems to stammer a lot. Of note, he recognized my Texas area code (432) and said he was from Texas, and that he knew some KKK people who he said he would send over to my house if I didn't stop calling. Unfortunately it's lost to time because I can't record from my cellphone and maintain a decent quality. I called him in the morning, when he woke up I honestly thought it was Chris. Anyways, I suck at this shit, I'm gonna just lurk and wtach from now on. I don't have what it takes to be a troll. Thanks for the interesting page, and sorry I don't have any audio to give you guys. [[User:ColossalFail|ColossalFail]] 19:35, 28 November 2009 (CET)

==Hey... ==

[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fIoS-gPOA0k]

My friend sent me this video earlier today. It has to do with someone prank calling Bob to get more info out of him involving his current life. Is there anything in it we could possibly use for this article? --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 16:41, 20 February 2010 (EST)

*Is stuff like this now subject to the new CWCki privacy laws? Or are we good with all that?-[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 19:54, 15 March 2010 (UTC)

==Congestive heart failure==

<center>{{Not_A_Forum}}</center>

Damn. We all knew this was coming eventually, but still.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:31, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

: We haven't confirmed it was actually Chris yet--I'm personally at 60-40 Chris, the writing style seems off(the Random Capitalization is unusual) but his posting pattern makes sense. Chris only seems to use Twitter when the CWCipedia has dicks on it and I doubt that he's checked recently.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 03:02, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:*The Twitter is his, he's written in the [[CWC Blog]] about it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:51, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:** I don't see it on the CWCipedia updates.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 03:02, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:***It would explain his lack of presence for the last few days.
: Huh, I don't see that tweet on [http://twitter.com/CWCSonichu his Twitter account]. Did he delete it, or am I just missing it somehow? --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 04:55, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:* No, it's there. It starts with "Captain's Log Stardate March 1st"--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:13, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:** Oh, now I see it. Thanks! *[[slow-in-the-mind]]* --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 17:51, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
I don't want to live in a Cwcville without Bob. If he dies, I'll kill myself.
''

I'm going to kill myself if Bob Chandler dies
I'm going to kill myself if he makes me cry
I'll slit my wrists or I'll cut my throat
but I'll kill myself, I'll kill myself, by bleeding on his doorstep.''

[[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 05:50, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

:My grandma died due to congestive heart failure. It isn't a pretty sight. -PeaceCeapPea

:I just heard the news. Dammit, Bob is awesome, I'm praying he doesn't kick it! PLEASE DON'T DIE, BOB! :'( [[User:ToyoWolf|Kimo]] 06:57, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Just to be clear, CHF doesn't necessarily mean heart attack/failure/imminent death. What it means is that the heart is weakened and is having trouble pumping enough blood to the rest of the body. A lot of overweight and older people develop CHF and don't kick off immediately because of it, and it is treatable. So Bob may live to chop down more internets yet. [[User:Kazmeyer|Kazmeyer]] 07:20, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

He spent 2 tweets discussing how his dad has a serious health issue, then six talking about himself and Sonichu. -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 07:46, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:*I know, right? What the fuck? That's pretty low. I know Chris has [[Mumble 1|implied]] that he doesn't love Bob, but I'd expect more than that. People always joke about Bob dying, but I wouldn't like that at all. He is the only sliver of awesome left in Chris's life. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 11:20, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
::*The thing is, people think that without Bob, we'd get more interesting results from Chris. Bob kept Chris from going to Redmond. Bob is more or less the reason why Chris won't travel anywhere for a troll. Anyways, I think the concern is that Bob has a long history of heart problems already and given his age, he's taken quite a beating and it wouldn't be unreasonable to suspect that this might do him in. Not that I pray for the death of Bob, mind you, only that this is the rationale of people focusing on Bob's death and why people aren't exactly optimistic. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:27, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:*I wouldn't expected anything else from him. What about "I am putting ''Sonichu'' on hold because my father is at the hospital"? That wouldn't have been a novelty. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 14:08, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

I think we should all do something nice for Lumberjack. Make his life a little easier. We should call in and wish him good health. How much better will he feel knowing that he is more loved than his internet famous son? He'd perk up right away. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 16:18, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:* He appreciated [[4 September 2009|Vivian's card]], that's probably a good idea. A picnic hamper perhaps? Some kind of gift package with food and/or nice shit. Chris won't go to that trouble; someone should.- [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 16:33, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
::*If someone sets up a paypal, I'd chip in 10 bucks. He's the internet lumberjack, after all.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 17:34, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
:::*I agree, that would be cool. [[User:Lynxr|–Ich bin schwul, '''Lynxr'''. Ich bin schwul.–]] 19:03, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
::*I plan on sending flowers by myself in the next few days. Some kind of "Get Well" bouquet. The man deserves it. He went through a lot and, even if he could had done better with Chris, he deserves a break. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 21:19, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
*I've started a /cwc/ thread on this here: http://legi0n.789chan.org/cwc/res/24043.html - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 18:54, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

I really hope Bob pulls through for Chris's sake. I really hate Chris but I know what it's like to lose one's father, and that's not something I'd wish upon anybody else. --[[User:Dann Woolf|Dann Woolf]] 16:44, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
*Yeah, seriously. I hope Bob gets well soon.--[[User:Kettle5000|Kettle5000]] 19:17, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
** Same here. Out of the Chandlers, Bob is easily the most likeable.....which isn't exactly that difficult seeing the rest of the Chandlers, but still.. --[[User:Torvalr|Torvalr]] 19:31, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Hey, all the colossal dicks are gone from the Cwcipedia. A mark of respect? --[[User:Kettle5000|Kettle5000]] 21:08, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
*Sadly, it looks like it. Chris do not deserve any respect. CWCipedia should be a ground for Cock-Parades 24/7/365 [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 21:19, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
**Dude, his dad could be fucking ''dying''. I think it's a nice gesture - that's why I mentioned it.--[[User:Kettle5000|Kettle5000]] 22:31, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
***I never saw Chris acting with compassion towards someone before, I don't see why we should indulge in Moral-Faggotery because of Bob's issues. As much as I respect the Old Man, He's not the jerk we all love to hate. This is why I strongly believe that the ads must be put back in place. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 23:25, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
::*Chris's 'stress' probably gets passed onto Bob. When Bob is in stable condition, there's no way Chris will be able to put his needs ahead of his own. He'll be getting all cunty about the trolling that he's receiving and not helping Bob's situaition at all. I say lay off and go with [[User:Edward|Edward's]] idea. Well wishes and get well soon ads for Bob. So what if Chris gets smug. Smug Chris is positive happy Chris, it's the closest he gets to that emotion. We can put up with that while his dad's in hospital, right? - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 00:27, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
**Seconded. /Scruffy --[[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 00:30, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
**Chris wouldn't give a fuck if his father died. He hates him. If he hasn't empaphized with anyone else, then why the father he hates so much? He'll fake sadness, pretend he cares, but he'll still consider fucking Patti the worst loss of his life. And going easy on Chris is no help for Bob, that just means that in possibly his last days with his father he'll be all smug about his victory over the gay ads. If anything they should put up a get well message for Bob using the adspace. I'm going to mention that to the Asperpedia crew next time i'm over there. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 22:42, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
***Agreed. Look at the Quote of the Now. He mentions that his dad is in the hospital and would be there for a few days, but he had a LOOOONG stressful day. He wants us to feel sorry for him for the day, not his dad. It would be the greatest wake up call when he does pass away.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 23:23, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
****Chris being selfish? that's old news. If bob dies, it's ovbiously he would become chris's new excuse " i can't do << insert anything>> because my dad died" for a while, he'll forget about him and continue to be the jerk we know. Id bob dies he will be free from the torments of chris, bob has been trough too many shit thanks to Chris, bob deserves to finally rest in peace. [[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 23:46, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
*****Actually, what would happen if Bob died? Presumably the family, not just Bob are living off his pension and social security. Even if they own the house completely, however much Barbra is bringing in plus $450 from Chris' board may not be enough to pay all their costs (bills, food, etc). --[[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 00:15, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
****** I wouldn't doubt that the accumulative total of both Chris' and Bab's welfare would be enough to sustain them- provided Chris stopped buying junk he never uses and stops eating at McDonald's. But it seems to me from the Twitter alone that Chris doesn't consider this emergency to be significant- it's like he skimmed across the issue as a lead-up to his retarded comic's scheduling, which in turn lead into "Rule 18" (which I can only assume is Chris' mistaken discovery of Rule 34). If he took the situation seriously at all, he'd either be pouring more emotion into it, or be absent altogether. --[[User:Spoonman|Spoonman]] 00:44, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
******* Well Chris claims to have gotten his pack rat nature from his parents. So there's the possibility that if Bob goes, they'll spend themselves into nothing. --[[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 01:05, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
-
• One thought- has anyone contacted [[Cole]] yet? I'm in Australia or I would myself. I know Chris doesn't gave a flying fuck and [[Snorlax]] almost certainly doesn't either. He should know I think. --Ronichu
* I think most of the family probably know by now (I would hope so anyway) but Cole has said in the past that he would celebrate when Bob "finally drops". Unless Cole is willing to make peace I say let him stay in the dark on this one, or leave it to the Chandlers to tell him. This is all too soon, I'm not ready for Bob to die yet... I just hope he dies comfortable, not at home and not surrounded by his family. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 01:40, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
**Yeah, when bob dies, i hope he doesn't has to see his failure son's face. [[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 02:52, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
**Agreed on letting the Chandlers tell Cole, if for no other reason than he might not believe some random troll from the Internet. --[[User:Kettle5000|Kettle5000]] 21:05, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Okay, I really need to ask this- where was it picked up that Bob had a 10% chance of survival? If it was in the linked article, I didn't see it.--[[User:Spoonman|Spoonman]] 09:03, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
*I am asking myself the same question; where this came from? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 11:09, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
** It doesn't, I think the person who wrote that must have seen the bit which says that it has an annual mortality rate of 10% and misunderstood it. He statistically has a 90% chance of surviving another year (provided he is suffering from the normal progressive form of the disease). I've changed the article to reflect this. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 11:29, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
:::Alright, awesome- I was just beginning to think if that had been true, then half my extended family is pretty damn lucky.--[[User:Spoonman|Spoonman]] 09:58, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

*If Bob does kick it (may he rest in peace if he does), what odds do you give on Chris going to a funny farm in the next 5 years? --[[User:Munch Banchibokkusu|Munch]] 19:00, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
:*Unless if the state of Virginia got no cheaper option. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 19:03, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

I try to send flowers to Bob but the FTD website ask for a phone number. Anyone got a clue what Chris's phone is? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 19:03, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

He tells us himself in the opening few seconds of [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2vGKa-k2Us this video]. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:14, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
*How about <s>Chris' credit card number</s> the hospital we should send them to? --[[User:Munch Banchibokkusu|Munch]] 19:17, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
*Chris's credit card number is 2984 8579 9562 3765. That number is fake by the way in case anyone missed the joke. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:24, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
:*thanks for the info. I forgot about this video. I rand FTD with a nice card and a Pink Lily Bouquet. Bob will receive them tomorrow.[[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 20:03, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
***Assuming Snorlax doesn't eat them first. --[[User:Munch Banchibokkusu|Munch]] 20:08, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
:*Do we know that Bob will get them? Knowing Chris, he'll assume that they are for him and make a youtube video thanking his secret admirer for sending him flowers. I hope that you made sure to put down in bold capitals that its for Bob, and even then its only a slim chance that he'll consider the idea that they're not for him. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 20:14, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
::*But pink is such a faggy color. --[[User:Munch Banchibokkusu|Munch]] 20:53, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
:::*There's a possibility that Chris will hijack the bouquet but let's see it that way; it's bloody pink if he does, we got material to doubt his straightness. Not only Bob's name is on the delivery slip but I also send a "Get Well" card mentioning him, the package couldn't be mistaken. FTD will deliver tomorrow. Let's see what it will bring us. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 21:19, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
:::*I sent Bob a bouquet as well. In all honesty, I enjoyed hearing about his experiences and feel bad that he's stuck with a horrible wife and son. The all the man wants is a chance to discuss the world and listen to his records. At the very least, he deserves to know that there are people that like him out there. --[[User:Benjamin|Benjamin]] 22:35, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
::::*What color? --[[User:Munch Banchibokkusu|Munch]] 00:41, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
:::::*Multi-colored. It's [http://www.teleflora.com/mixed-flowers/bouquet/make-a-wish-167864p.asp?s=t&promotioncode=Shed10&srccode=SH_FR&ci_src=14110944&ci_sku=TFWEB164 this one.] [[User:Benjamin|Benjamin]] 01:00, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
:::*If Chris suffered heart failure, I wouldn't send flowers. --[[User:Munch Banchibokkusu|Munch]] 04:29, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

*I kinda want Bob to die (Don't look at me like i am a monster) because I want the vicarious thrill of watching 14 Branchland Court implode without his common sense. --[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 20:44, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
** Me too. He's pretty much the only person who ever tried to stop a Sweetheart opperation--he could have stopped Julie if Max hadn't been a good liar. Nothing will set the Snorlax off unless you try to lure Chris somewhere, and even then I remind you that we still got him to defy her and go to Ohio. Her general logic for any scenario seems to be "If Chris actually gets a girl, I'll believe it when I see her, otherwise it's his own damn fault for being stupid". This is Chris's logic, minus the part after the comma. Oh, and no Bob means less money, and what's going to make you think Chris starts stealing his tugboat payment from her?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 22:00, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
*** If you kinda want Bob to die to make trolling Chris easier you're kinda a far more worthless human being than Chris is. [[User:Kazmeyer|Kazmeyer]] 23:41, 3 March 2010 (UTC)
**** I'll justify myself, then. I will be sad to see Bob die, and I will be happy to see what happens when he's gone.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 00:12, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
***Like I said, I'm no monster, I just wanna see Chris fall apart without Bob's guidance. --[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 00:29, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
**** If Chris has no-one to defend him or motivate him, it won't be a challenge to troll him anymore. I like Bob, and if I get to his age I intend to spend all day everyday swingin' with the music. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 02:30, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
**** Well, since Barb is too weighed down by her own rolls to do anything, if Bob dies, there will be shit hitting fans in Chris' home real soon, and I don't mean cat shit.. Either way it's going to be funny considering Chris' warped view on death. --[[User:CrookedSmirk|CrookedSmirk]]
**** She's not that fat, not yet anyway.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 05:48, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

I know everyone has realized this by now, but I don't think Chris understands the severity of it all. On his Twitter, it says that Bob came down with a ''case'' of congestive heart failure. The way he's talking about it, it seems that Chris thinks that this is something Bob can overcome like a sick bug or something. That also explains the lack of concern in his two videos - he actually thinks Bob's gonna be alright in a few days, as if some R&R would do good! He doesn't realize that this may very well be the beginning of the end!--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:20, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
:*This is why I pity Bob Chandler right now. He's a man with decades of fair work, a patent on his name and the opportunity to be called the veteran of the most intense war the world never saw. Only for this, he will be a better man than myself. Here's the sad part. On the Internets, he will be remembered as the "Joseph" of the "Fail Messiah". The very fact that Chris ignore him in what we might call his last hours on Earth is shocking to me. He really don't deserve this. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 05:43, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
:*Point. Bob's death may come as a total and complete surprise to Chris.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 05:48, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
:*How do we even know Barb would let him know all the details? Wouldn't she consider keeping Chris ignorant to be a small mercy? --[[User:LeninandMcCarthy|LeninandMcCarthy]] 05:56, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
:**Small mercy? From everything I've heard of her, if she kept the details from Chris it would be because it's easier on her to just not tell him. In all honesty if anything's going to happen with this, it should be trying to get Chris to actually spend time with his father. Remember, the closest he's had to a constant in his life dying is his dog, and Optimus Prime, and in Chris' mind both of those came back. -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 06:59, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

:I still think we should do something nice for Bob while he's sick. Unlike Chris, Bob is definitely someone I see as with positive qualities along with the negative (which he has plenty of, but don't we all). In light of this, I wanted to have a small hatched engraved with a message "For 'The Internet Lumberjack'. Get well soon! - The Trolls" on the front face and "Keep on swinging!" on the back. I found a place that does engraving along with a hatchet that would be suitable ($100 or so cost all up, probably about the same for postage, not a problem for me since I work), unfortunately I called Australia Post and they said that there were import restrictions on edged weapons into the United States for some reason. Is there anywhere in the US where one could order something similar to the above created and delivered? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 05:28, 4th of March 2010 (Australian Central Standard Time).
:*Does Bob even know that he's the Internet Lumberjack? The joke might be totally lost on him. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 10:43, 4 March 2010 (UTC)
*The cause was an internet fell on him. --[[User:Robotnik|Robotnik]] 08:14, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

*If bob dies, do you think chris will put him in his comic, just like patty?[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 18:54, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

* Probably, but he'll be a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kim_Il_Sung Kim Il-Sung] type character, The dead but eternal leader of CWCville. --[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 20:37, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

*For those who don't know, [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/ Charlottesville obituaries are here]. I'm not sure if this has been posted yet; correct me if it has. So far Bob has not shown up. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 21:17, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

*If he dies, I hope the funeral isn't private, because I plan on burying my axe and a broken internet modem with him.
--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 23:02, 4 March 2010 (UTC)

Guys, please, this is getting out of hand. There's lots of places to discuss stuff for Bob like sending him flowers and shit. But this place is not the place to do it. Please refer to [[CWCki:NOTAFORUM|this]]. Talk pages should be reserved for how to improve the article and not for content - it was alright to discuss the validity of the tweets, for instance, but this is getting out of hand. Fuck, you can even arrange things on the Community Portal if you really want to.

Next person who posts something not related to improving the Bob Chandler article '''will be banned.''' --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:25, 5 March 2010 (UTC)

I've added a heading below the ''Health and late life'' heading called ''What about Bob?''. I'm using it to encompass what little we know about the recent heart failure saga, and briefly touch on Chris's extracurricular activities during it. I figure once it's all over with, it will be much easier to delete the heading and contents as a whole, rather than sift through the Bob article and remove things piecemeal. But if it's getting too big, or if you all don't like it, feel free to cut it down in the spirit of Bob. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 06:26, 10 March 2010 (UTC)

==Bob's past heart attacks==

If you check out the transcript for the [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|Emily Date]], you'll see several gaps, one of which is very large. I just reached the point in the audio where the first gap occurs, and it's ''right there'' that Bob starts talking about his history of health problems, most notable of which are his past heart attacks. We seem to have a surplus of Bob fans, so would one (or more) of you like to start filling in that gap (and/or the others)? I'm willing to do it myself, but I'm not the world's fastest typist, and - all kidding aside - I'd like to have all of this information about Bob made available before the man dies. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 03:57, 5 March 2010 (UTC)
*I'm surprised I haven't noticed this before. I'll actually add this to the Improvement of the Now. Be sure to mention this in the [[Transcription Collective]] as well. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:32, 5 March 2010 (UTC)

*He's definitely gonna die soon, because the fact that he's had four heart attacks and is older than my grandfather by a decade (he was born in 1937) , is a telltale sign that he's gonna meet Billy Mays sometime within the year.

*PSN message shows than Bob is okay, according to Chris, at least. Should he die, it'll be a day of mourning, but not for Cole. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000]] 23:20, 7 April 2010 (UTC)

==Should we really be checking the Charlottesville obituaries?==

I thought that the Chandlers lived in Ruckersville and not Charlottesville proper. Perhaps someone from the area can inform me of the truth?--[[User:Doomknight|Doomknight]] 08:28, 9 March 2010 (UTC)

Yeah, but isn't the hospital in Charlottesville? I'd call them myself but my Boston accent's too thick for them to not raise an eyebrow. --[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 21:10, 9 March 2010 (UTC)

I had assumed that Ruckersville wouldn't have their own obit listing, but I just found out that they do. I'll add that link to the Charlottesville link on Bob's page. It's more of an off chance that he'd be listed anyway. Considering that the only people who would even write an obit would be Barb or Chris, it's doubtful if he'd even get one. But since we've all basically been pissing in the wind regarding Bob for the last week, it's about all we can do. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 06:14, 10 March 2010 (UTC)

== Is Bob dead..? ==

[http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm Is Chris still in control of this site?], because "Sonichu is no longer being updated. My father's passing has been too great for me. :( It is like I Lost Patti All Over Again."

The site was last updated on the 31st of March... --[[User:AsperGirl|AsperGirl]] 06:50, 8 April 2010 (UTC)

*It's a troll page. I think someone already saw and mentioned it elsewhere.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 06:59, 8 April 2010 (UTC)

* I personally spoke to both Bob and Snorlax about seven hours ago. They are both alive. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 07:18, 8 April 2010 (UTC)

So some people of TV Tropes seem to think Bob's dead. I've looked through a few websites that list obituaries from Ruckersville and Charlottesville and he wasn't listed on any of them. Any conformation as to whether he's alive or not? --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' 23:42, 12 May 2010 (UTC)
*No telling, could be a trolling plot. I think we'd be warned if Bob was dead. The simple solution is to call Chris and simply ask him.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 08:24, 13 May 2010 (UTC)
** I tried calling him yesterday to ask him about Bob, but I couldn't get a hold of him. I'll try again, even though I know he probably won't pick it up. (How do you guys even manage to talk to him, anyway?) --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' 23:12, 13 May 2010 (UTC)
::*There are about 15 more 'Sydney Calls' which are just voicemail messages and the like. Chris is too lazy to answer his phone and his parents are quite sick of all the pranks. Keep trying and you'll eventually get through. I tell you what though, if Chris actually gets a call from a game designer they would not put up with someone being so impossibly unreliable to contact. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 23:18, 13 May 2010 (UTC)
:::* Ah, I thought "call until he decides to pick up" would be the answer. I managed to get him on the line once sometime last year, but that was back when I was a CWC newfag, sooooo I froze up and hung up. *fails forever*

But yeah, that'd be yet another reason (out of an infinite amount of reasons) why game designers wouldn't touch ''Sonichu'' with a ten-foot pole. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' 01:25, 14 May 2010 (UTC)
::*If so, then a new era has begun. If not, then we can annoy Chris. And there's nothing Rocky can do about it.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 23:47, 13 May 2010 (UTC)
::*Heh, don't worry about the freezing up thing. Sydney was a huge fail, but she was about 50x more successful than my previous effort, where I got absolutely no response at all, only annoyed him a little, didn't record anything at all, entertained his parents and then nearly dox'd myself due to my tardness. Just to be sure, you're not calling him with your real phone, right? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 01:32, 14 May 2010 (UTC)
::** Er.... Yeah, I'm using my cell phone. And for extra fail points, I use Audactiy to try to record my calls. What should I do instead? '''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' 18:49, 25 May 2010 (UTC)
== racist ==
so has bob ever actually been out-and-out racist or is that just a (probably correct) assumption? just wondering [[User:Woot Rodriguez|Woot Rodriguez]] 15:56, 3 June 2010 (UTC)
{{quote|Listen boy, you get your black ass down in the gutter and stay there!|Bob, [[Prank_calls#.27Epic_Crazy_Lady.27_calls_Bob|choreographing trolls]]}}
This quote would suggest Bob thinks of black people in a negative light, referring to the trolls as being black. I'm stereotyping, but it's not uncommon for people from his generation to hold racist views. Him having been raised in Alabama would also suggest that he was exposed to racist views. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 16:07, 3 June 2010 (UTC)

ahahaha, how did i ever miss that article? funny shit, thanks man. although in another video on the page (just reading the transcript here, my speakers are busted so i can't hear how he says it so he could be being sarcastic or dismissive or whatever) he tells a troll to put effort into something constructive like helping haitians. i've known people who said stuff similar to "get your black ass down" (ok, not really that phrase but you get what i'm saying) and they aren't really racist. but then again i also live in south louisiana so that probably has something to do with the different standards for what constitutes racism or something (down here someone's not really considered racist until they start throwing around the n-word or other slurs or explicitly slander a race/someone because of their race). which, of course, isn't to say that makes saying something like that any less heinous.[[User:Woot Rodriguez|Woot Rodriguez]] 15:59, 5 June 2010 (UTC)

or maybe i'm just willing to give some people more leeway than they deserve; yeah that's probably it. [[User:Woot Rodriguez|Woot Rodriguez]] 05:41, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

== That picture of Bob and Chris ==

Long time lurker, love the site. I was just looking at the picture of Bob and Chris in what appears to be a classroom (0230-ChristianAndDadInClass.jpg) and was noticing the Grade Chart. Am I reading it wrong, or does it seem to award money prizes for different grades, with at least 5$ being awarded even for failure? If I'm not misinterpreting it, does this mean Chris was getting rewarded, no matter how badly he did? [[User:Colonelslime|Colonelslime]] 17:55, 16 July 2010 (UTC) (Edited to add signature, my apologies)

* First off, sign your posts, four tildes at the end of your post. To answer your question, it might not mean that, in that he probably wasn't making money. Many teachers have systems with their students to encourage learning. The teacher makes some fake money, the kids take a test, the kids earn money based on their performance. She'll have a thing of toys they can buy with what they make. It was apparently popular back in the 80s and mid 90s, but nowadays kids can get better stuff than that by themselves. There's a slight chance that the kids were actually getting paid, but that would be a pretty bad plan for a teacher to put into motion. If so, it probably would have been for their final, overall grade, but still. Also, there is a talk page for files as well, so if you have anything else post there, alright? [[User:Schuzrum-dias|Schuzrum Dias]] 07:30, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

== The Automatic (Something) is...? ==

Could it possibly be he worked on the first automatic switchboard for the area, or possibly the whole reigon? I've read up on these, and it sounds like he worked on the first installation as part of a test run to see how well they would function under standard call input rates and to test how durable they were under stress. --[[User:Eniggy|Eniggy]] 16:55, 19 August 2010 (PDT)

:'''>Test how durable they were under stress.''' Pity he couldn't do the same with his son.[[User:ProtoAuthor|ProtoAuthor]] 07:36, 11 April 2011 (PDT)

== Patents ==

Here are two more patents with Bob's name on them I couldn't fit in the Work section because I am about to Crash into Slumber.

http://www.google.com/patents?id=jKU4AAAAEBAJ
http://www.google.com/patents?id=-DMBAAAAEBAJ

--[[User:KarryLing|KarryLing]] 01:07, 12 September 2010 (PDT)

==Grand Wizard Bob ==
While I know that the revelation of his Klan membership came right out of the horse's mouth, Does anyone know if he's really a member, or just bullshitting?--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 12:23, 24 September 2010 (PDT)

:He's not saying he's a member. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 14:05, 24 September 2010 (PDT)

He implied he was a member, just read this quote:''''' I’ve seen crosses burning, fella. I've seen 'em. And you don’t wanna see it. '''''
--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 15:45, 24 September 2010 (PDT)
* A good few black people have seen cross burnings, I doubt they're members. I'm guessing he was just trying to scare the callers. --[[User:Schuzrum-dias|Schuzrum Dias]] 16:29, 24 September 2010 (PDT)

== Is Bob actually part Cherokee? ==

Or is it just Chris making shit up? - slubub

== Cancer Call? ==
anybody got links?--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 15:57, 29 March 2011 (PDT)
* Bob has cancer!? By God, the poor fella. My heart goes out to him. Also http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-GGSOyCm2k Here's a link to the call. --[[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 21:36, 20 April 2011 (PDT)
**I am unsure about the whole "Cancer" thing. As long as I don't hear a FA or Chris confirming the info, I will assume that Bob is pulling our leg. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 04:52, 21 April 2011 (PDT)

==Is Bob technically a troll?==
Bob's joke about Obama appeared in the 4 Cent Garbage building, so shouldn't that make him a troll since he contributed to it? Maybe we should include this in the article. --[[User:SonichuIsMyHero|SonichuIsMyHero]] 07:57, 8 June 2011 (PDT)
:Look up what a troll is. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 08:08, 8 June 2011 (PDT)

==BobWatch==
I've added a section under What About Bob that's meant to hold more of the bulleted news info, to separate it from the more narrative information. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 14:00, 29 August 2011 (PDT)

== Changing tenses in the article ==

If Bob truly is dead, (which, unfortunately, [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600 appears to be the case]), then CWCki editors need to change his page to reflect things in the past tense. --[[User:IwegalBadnik|IwegalBadnik]] 09:35, 10 September 2011 (PDT)

*I'll look into changing tenses and maybe tidying it up a little, in light of what's happened. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 10:18, 10 September 2011 (PDT)

*I changed maybe three words to reflect Bob's passing. Since English isn't my first language, hopefully someone can check it! --[[User:Volodya|Volodya]] 10:27, 10 September 2011 (PDT)

Talk:Bob Chandler

2011-09-10T17:27:14Z

Volodya: /* Changing tenses in the article */

User:Volodya

2011-09-10T17:20:17Z

Volodya: Created page with "My name is Vladimir and I apologize in advance for any English mistakes."

My name is Vladimir and I apologize in advance for any English mistakes.

Bob Chandler

2011-09-10T17:19:13Z

Volodya:

: ''"Bob" redirects here. For the troll occasionally known as Bob, see [[Robert Simmons V]].''

{{quote|I’ve seen crosses burning, fella. I've seen 'em. And you don’t wanna see it.|Bob<ref>[[Prank calls#Call Bobby Chandler]]</ref>}}

{{quote|This ain't my time yet.|Bob laughing at death <ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|Emily Date]]</ref>}}
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | Chandler family
|-
| colspan="2" | [[Image:Chrischansdad.jpg|300px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Bob Chandler
|-
| '''Birth name'''
| Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.
|-
| '''Nicknames'''
| [[Bob Walks In|Internet Lumberjack]]
[[Cole|That fuck Bob]]
|-
| '''Born'''
| 4 September [[Pre-1980#1920s|1927]]
|-
| '''Died'''
| 6 September [[2011]]
|-
| '''Gender'''
| Male
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| White (1/16th [[Cherokee]])
|-
| '''Parents'''
| Robert (father)
|-
| '''Education'''
| Auburn University (engineering)
|-
| '''Occupation(s)'''
| Military communications, engineer
|-
|}
[[Image:DemonicLumberjack.jpg|thumb|'''The Internet Lumberjack''' in his final form]]
'''Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.'''<ref>[[Blanca E-mails#Chris likes Blanca|Email to Blanca]]</ref> (4 September [[Pre-1980#1920s|1927]]- 6 September [[2011]] <ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html#P155</ref>) was the father of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], [[Carol Chandler]] and [[David Alan Chandler]], and husband of [[Barbara Weston Chandler]]. Bob became a firm favorite with [[trolls]] due to Chris's intense dislike of him and Bob's infamous cameo when he walked in on Chris [[mass debating]].<ref>[[Bob Walks In]]</ref> His nickname, "the [[Internet]] Lumberjack," comes from this incident.

While loathed by and estranged from his other children and step-child, Bob was still viewed as a better parent than his wife [[Barbara]], due to him being somewhat concerned with Chris's current status as a [[virgin with rage]], and the fact that he occasionally tried to guilt him into being more considerate by bringing up the fact that he devoted 29 years to raising a selfish manchild. Of course, Chris is unfazed by these attempts.

Bob had conversed with numerous trolls. Thanks to his tendency to yap on, more information became known through these talks.

Bob passed away on September 6, 2011, at Martha Jefferson Hospital ICU surrounded by family, pastor and hospital staff.<ref>http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600</ref>

==Biography==
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|"I seen crosses burnin', fella."]]

===Service and education===

Bob was born in [[Wikipedia:Fort Worth, Texas|Fort Worth, Texas]]<ref name="Prank calls">[[Prank calls]]</ref> and raised in [[Wikipedia:Alabama|Alabama]].<ref name="About">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#About Bob (7:18 - 16:45)]]</ref>

Bob was drafted after [[Wikipedia:World War II|World War II]] and placed in [[Wikipedia:Signal Corps (United States Army)|the Signal Corps]]. There, he learned how to install valve systems, switchboards, and telephones, and got to visit the beautiful [[CWCville|North Korea]]. When he got out, he couldn't get a job and so went to college on the [[Wikipedia:G.I. Bill|G.I. Bill]].<ref name="About" />

Since he figured he'd get "swallowed up" at a big college, Bob picked a small college to study pre-Engineering for two years. He was also in a band and learned a lot about [[music]]. He then moved onto [[Wikipedia:Auburn University|Auburn University]], a big college, to earn his engineering degree.<ref name="About" /> As an engineer, he never learned to spell properly.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#The Date Begins (4:47 - 7:17)]]</ref>

===Career===

Bob worked for [[Wikipedia:Western Electric|Western Electric]] for forty years. Using skills learned in the Army, he built for the company their first automatic [something] (it's unclear what Bob says here). General Electric heard about it and offered him a job in upstate New York. Since New York is too cold (and Yankee) for Bob, he moved away after three years, working in North Carolina for some time.<ref name="About" /> He worked with both Goodrich and Goodyear.<ref name="PSN 37" />

With General Electric, Bob was responsible for at least seven patents. [[Barbara]] claimed, in an e-mail to [[Miyamoto]], that because of Bob's influence in the computer world, the [[Wikipedia:Nintendo Entertainment System|NES]] "might not have arrived so soon" (despite video game technology actually being pioneered by [[Wikipedia:Ralph Baer|Ralph Baer]]).<ref name="Barbara" />

As examples of Bob's accom-PLISH-ments, as Chris would say, he automated a steel mill for rolling steel for cars, a paper mill for papers into the form of Kleenex, warehousing, railroads and tanker ships. He designed scooters, die casting machines, machines for producing plastic products<ref name="About" /> and a [http://www.google.com/patents/about?id=PIU_AAAAEBAJ vehicle logging system]. A fact that both Chris and Barbara have bragged about is that Bob designed [http://www.google.com/patents/about?id=vScrAAAAEBAJ controls] that were used in plastic water [container] molding machines.<ref name="About" /><ref name="Barbara">[[Miyamoto Saga#Barbara]]</ref>

===World consciousness===

[[Image:0012-BobbyReading.jpg|thumb|Bob learning how to cut that Internet down]]

On the other hand, Bob himself is proud of his "natural inclination for logic," although he is "inundated" by all his designs and whether he did good for the world.<ref name="About" />

Speaking of the world, Bob has been interested in it since he was 10, and has become very world conscious as a believer in the [[Wikipedia:United Nations|United Nations]]. He began by collecting foreign stamps in the [[1930s]]. He has collected 15,000–20,000 LPs from various genres and cultures.<ref name="PSN 37"/> Bob traveled the world in his day for business and [[china|pleasure]].

Politically, Bob identifies as a [[Wikipedia:Republican Party (United States)|Republican]], and did not vote for [[Barack Obama]] in [[Wikipedia:United States presidential election, 2008|the 2008 presidential election]].<ref name="Prank calls"/>

In a potentially damaging moment on 18 [[February 2009]], Bob doubted the existence of [[Molvanîa]], [[Julie]]'s fictional country of origin.<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]]</ref> However, he continued talking under the assumption that Molvanîa was under Russian control.<ref name="PSN 37">[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7]]</ref>

===Health and late life===

[[Image:LumberjackTapestry.JPG|thumb|Robert had Medieval English ancestry]]
[[File:Heart15.jpg|thumb|Computer-generated model of Bob's near-shattered heart.]]
Bob lives on social security and General Electric pension.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref> He hasn't really had people to chat with (he loves to ramble if the person shows some slight interest), so he sits around, listens to music,<ref name="PSN 37" /> and takes care of the garden inside the greenhouse. With a 1970s stereo system set up in the greenhouse, he goes to "swing with the music" on his swing there.<ref name="Raising" />

Bob has had two triple bypasses and four heart attacks. He wears an [[Wikipedia:Artificial pacemaker|artificial pacemaker]].<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref> In a recent prank call, Bob revealed that after surgery for cancer it was discovered that he has a fluid build up in his legs which can cause heart failure. This rapid decline in health worries him. <ref>[[Prank_calls]]</ref> He attributes his long life to the [[Cherokee]] in him. Let's hope that Chris hasn't inherited the traits for this longevity. His uncles and grandfather all lived to 90-100.<ref name="PSN 37" />

A major question in the [[troll]] community is what will happen now that Bob has died.

===What about Bob?===

[[Image:Bobbetter.jpg|thumb|"Now will you PLEASE let me get back to God of War 3???"]]

On 1 [[March 2010]], Chris [[Twitter]]ed that Bob had been taken to the hospital in the early morning for congested [''sic''] [[Wikipedia:Heart failure|heart failure]]. Chris seemed confident that his father would come home shortly. Considering Bob's age, lifestyle, and long history of heart disease, [[Chris and death|Chris does not seem to grasp the seriousness of heart failure in an elderly man]]. Bob is the only thing keeping [[14 Branchland Court|the Chandler household]] from imploding, and as such, trolls and white knights alike wished him the best.

[[Image:Bobbed.jpg|thumb|Apart from the dying heart]]

In the month following Bob's hospitalization, Chris was remarkably quiet on the subject. Information about his condition was hard to come by, as we only learn something [[Ego|once it has inconvenienced Chris enough for him to come online and complain about it]]. Statistically, congestive heart failure is not as immediately fatal as its name implies.<ref>[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Congestive_heart_failure Congenital Heart Failure on Wikipedia]</ref> But again, Bob's age, prior heart attacks and lifestyle made this a serious matter.

Chris's videos over the month of March made no mention of Bob at all. Staying true to his painfully predictable nature, Chris instead lost a [[The Wallflower|girlfriend he never had]], [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|made racial slurs and death threats to a cartoon character]], and [[F Abstinance|raged against abstinence]]. But no mention of his ailing father.

A poster on [[/cwc/| /cwc/]] contacted Chris via PSN regarding Bob. He posted a [http://www.cogsdev.org/w/images/9/9b/Bobbetter.jpg screen capture] of Chris's response, saying, "He is doing much better, thank you." [[Image:King.jpg|thumb|"Know this, Robert. Thy demise shall be a Whopper!"]]Another contacted Chris via email and got a response saying, "Yes, my father is healthy and safe." He is clearly neither, but this was at least proof that Bob hadn't joined the Whites-Only section of Heaven just yet. In late May, Chris finally made [[Some Favored Comedians|a brief mention]] in a public video that his father was "alive and well," with no further elaboration on his condition.

On September 6, 2011, Bob [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600/ passed away], presumably from congestive heart failure. Luckily for Chris, he did not [[Aunt Corrina|die on pancake day]].

===BobWatch™===

On 10 August, 2010 [[Matthew Noble call|a phone call]] took place between Bob and Alec Benson Leary, who posed as an employee of [[GAMe PLACe|The GAMe PLACe]]. Discussing Chris's June trespassing citation, it was discovered that Chris hadn't told his parents about the incident (surprise, surprise). Chris posted [[6 June 2010|a whiny video]] about the incident the night that it happened, which remained on his YouTube channel until he purged all of his videos on 22 November. Yeah, that's how negligent Bob is.

On 19 August, 2010 it was revealed that the elderly man with heart failure was still [[Coffee Place|eating breakfast at Burger King]] on a daily basis. The Grim Reaper is said to have been pleased by this news.

On 24 March, 2011, Bob claimed in a phone call to have cancer.<ref>http://youtu.be/y-GGSOyCm2k</ref>

On 20 July, 2011, it was revealed that by now [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Coming out to my parents|Bob knows about Chris's cross-dressing tendencies]] and strongly disapproves of them.

On 29 August, 2011, Chris [[Calling_Out#Response_to_ADF|mentioned in a video]] that his father is no longer getting out much because he is sickly and his feet are bloated. Foot swelling is a [http://www.cardioassoc.com/patient_pgs/conditions/congestive.asp symptom of late-stage congestive heart failure.] With his mobility limited, Bob has become a shut in, which will only compound his heart problems.

On 6 September, 2011, Bob dies, and a mournful internet is left to cut itself down in honor of the fallen lumberjack.

==Relationships==

===Previous family===

Bob is out of contact<ref name="Cole2">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref> with his son [[David Alan Chandler]] and daughter [[Carol Suzanne Chandler]], who both lead successful careers. For example, Chris did not know he had a niece named [[Savannah Chandler|Savannah]] until she was 8 years old.<ref>[[CWC's Diary#January 2004]]</ref>

===Barbara===

[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|With [[barbara Chandler|Barb]]]]

To continue with the music theme, Bob and [[Barbara]] met in a bar on a karaoke night. Barbara was there with friends and Bob was singing.<ref name="Mumble 3.5">[[Mumble 3.5]]</ref> According to Chris, Barbara did the [[How to Talk to Girls|pursuing]]: "She chased him down the hall." This is probably why he figures that he could get away with being passive in terms of courtship. In contrast, [[Cole|Cole's]] friend Chuck, who worked at the bar, has a vivid memory of them being drunk retards.<ref name="Cole2" /> They got married in 1980.<ref name="Mumble 3.5" />

According to Chris, Barbara has not had sex with Bob for at least two decades. They have been sleeping in separate rooms for the past few years.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref> This is possibly due to an attempt to avoid spawning another subhuman freak like Chris.

===Cole===
Bob married Barbara when her son [[Cole]] was 17, around the time Cole left to lead his own life.

Cole feels that Bob's bitterness worked to separate his relationship with his mother. Cole will celebrate<ref name="Cole2"/> "when that fuck Bob finally drops."<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|Email from Cole to Chris]]</ref> Cole said that he and Bob share a mutual hatred,<ref name="Cole2" /> though we have no evidence yet that Bob hates Cole. In the least, it is certain that Bob knows Cole doesn't like him.<ref name="Raising"/>

===Chris===

{{quote|Get away from the Internet!
I'm cutting it down, right now.|Bob Chandler, Internet lumberjack.}}

[[Image:0106-ChristianWDad.jpg|thumb|"You tell them that you fell down some stairs or else I'm cutting down your [[Nintendo]]."]]

Bob wishes Chris was more interested in the world. He tried to teach Chris, but he thinks (and rightly so) that Chris doesn't understand countries and continents beyond what he's seen on [[TV]], and only can associate with the places he's been in Virginia.<ref name="PSN 37" />

Bob's joke that [[Barack Obama]] would paint the White House black as soon as he became president influenced Chris to draw it in ''[[Sonichu 8]]''.

Chris has often complained about stressful confrontations with his father:

{{quote|well, my father is a major stressor against me; starts arguements[sic], annoys me, rarely washes his hands after restroom breaks (lord knows I've tried to encourage him to wash numerous time, and rarely succeeded.|Chris, [[IRC (31 December 2008)]]}}

After several occasions where trolls have communicated with Bob personally and found him to be quite pleasant and amicable, it's become obvious that he wasn't "starting arguments", as Chris asserts. More likely he was criticizing Chris's behavior and encouraging to better himself, which would involve work, which Chris fears and despises.

Bob has reportedly explained to him that he has taken care of his [[autistic]] ass for 29 years and so Chris should be more grateful. Chris couldn't give two shits, figuring that his father is ''obligated'' to take care of him, seeing no reason he should demonstrate any foreign concepts like "love", "support", "gratitude", and "willingness to help". Chris will run for his father's aid when he feels threatened, as in the later parts of the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]].

Despite Bob's occasional frustration over Chris's actions, he seems to have bought into the theory that Chris is tormented by a [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|complex network of enemies spanning the entire world]], due to the [[Chris and his ego|success]] that he has earned from his very [[Chris and his ego|popular]] Sonichu franchise.<ref name="Church">[[Church audio]]</ref><ref name="Noble">[[Matthew Noble call]]</ref> In the [[Matthew Noble call]], it appears that Bob seems to share Chris's tendency to bring up unrelated mishaps and debacles to make current incidents and sources of [[stress]] seem "petty" in comparison.

In line with that thread of distraction and self-delusion, Bob actually believes that Chris has accomplished significant goals in his adult life.<ref name="Prank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNHIbffirxU&feature=player_embedded</ref>

He may eventually get past that notion, given that he continues to have to nursemaid Chris well into his son's late 20s. In the later parts of 2009 and throughout 2010, as chronicled in Chris's e-mails with [[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009|Vivian Gee]] and [[Jackie E-mails 7|Jackie]], Bob has been forced to take an increasingly active role in controlling Chris's spending and debt, paying off Chris's credit cards with his own money in an attempt to prevent interest charges from spiraling even further out of control. By the fall of 2010, he was monitoring Chris's bank accounts on a daily basis and keeping him on a strict allowance. Upon finding out about Chris's [[Tomgirl Pictures|escapades]] in early 2011, Bob's reaction was to question Chris's sexuality, at one point even calling him a fag.

Chris has said specifically that he doesn't have to love his father, but has to respect him.<ref>[[Mumble 1#Transcript|Mumble Chat 1]]</ref>

==Audio and video appearances==

In every appearance, Bob has proven himself to be better at charming Chris's [[sweetheart]]s than Chris himself.

* 26 February [[1994]]: Bob appears briefly behind Chris from 0:26 - 0:36 in the news report of Chris's [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]].
* 14 [[February 2009]]: [[Bob Walks In]] to Chris [[mass debating]].
* 18 [[February 2009]]: In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]] and [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7|3.7]], Bob rambles to [[Julie]].
* 15 [[March 2009]]: Bob [[Church audio|talked]] to [[Robert Simmons V]] at [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]] while [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Chris went to shit himself]].
* [[March 2009]]: Bob chaperoned Chris on his date with [[Emily]].
* 27 [[March 2009]]: Bob gets intruded by Chris in the [[Tour of Christian's House]], but is not visible.
* 27 [[August 2009]]: [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|Bob enters Chris's room]] and scolds him for making the [[Tour of Christian's House|house tour video]], (correctly) fearing that if someone saw the house as it was, they would be evicted (Uncut version only). This is a momentous occasion, showing some awareness on the part of the Chandlers that the filth and squalor they live in is a health hazard. This video subsequently off a wave of emails and calls to the Greene County Health Department, masterminded by trolls who hoped to realize Bob's fear of eviction, but the campaign was seemingly unsuccessful.
* [[November 2009]]: Bob and [[Barb|Snorlax]] make a brief appearance at the end of the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]].
* 15 [[August 2010]]: Bob gets a [[Matthew Noble call|call from the GAMe PLACe]] and is informed of Chris's actions earlier in the year. He then goes on a tangent about how Chris has been tormented by everyone ever since he was banned, and then demands Michael Snyder's information. Barbara also appears at the end of the call.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Thehell.jpg|"The hell is this crap?"
Image:0009-ChristopherChristmas2.jpg|Looking at the presents, it's sometime between 1982 and 2011.
Image:0011-ChristopherBobXmas.jpg|That isn't Chris's half-senile old grandfather at [[Christmas]] time. It's Bob. He was that age when Chris was about one.
Image:0014-YoungerFather.jpg
Image:0032-BobAtRestraunt.jpg|The epitome of handsome.
Image:0038-AuntCorinaAndDad.jpg|Bob with [[Aunt Corrina]].
Image:0062-NewChristian&Dad.jpg|Notice Chris's discomfort.
Image:0120-BobbyBehindBars.jpg|Bob won't let a fence get in the way of cutting down Chris's Internet.
Image:0230-ChristianAndDadInClass.jpg|Bob: fashion icon.
Image:0626-BobbyInGarden.jpg|When Bob isn't arguing with Chris or cutting down his Internet, he enjoys gardening.
Image:CreepyBobAndChris.JPG|Bob will haunt your dreams tonight.
Image:Bob_80th.jpg|Calm down Bob, I think you're scaring Snorlax.
</gallery>
</center>

==Sauces==
{{Fan Art|chris=Bob Chandler}}
<references />

{{People}}
{{Not_Jerks}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Bob}}
[[Category:Family Members]]