CWCki - User contributions [en]

Kacey Call 4

2011-03-06T18:47:06Z

Wozblod: corrected the line starting with "Yeah, I have all the board games you've played."

28 [[August 2009]]

==Highlights==
*Chris begins the call by asking [[Kacey]] if she has an STD (!).
*Kacey received a lot of awards during her high school graduation, Chris is jealous.
*Chris suggests talking about political issues even though he has nothing to say about political issues.
*Kacey asks Chris about things she found on the [[ED]] page.
*Chris totally doesn't drink [[cum]] anymore.
*Chris totally doesn't [[shit]] himself anymore.
*Chris totally isn't gullible anymore
*Chris lies the last time he shat himself was THREE YEARS AGO.
*Chris tries to explain why he has so many fucking [[video game]] accounts.
*Chris whines that he only gets 200 out of his 800 a month, and spends 150 on video games.
*Chris was going to call someone about getting a job, "but then stress happened".
*Chris used credit cards to buy thousands of video games, parents are paying the bills.
*Chris doesn't know why he got a [[CADD]] degree, "I feel more comfortable with drawing da [[comics]] than with da buildings and da computers".
*Chris is sending printed-out [[Sonichu]] comics to Marvel, DC and Dark Horse; thinks they will hire him because he's "very popular".
*[[Mary Lee Walsh]] caused all of his problems.
*Chris is capable of surviving, cooking and doing laundry.
*Chris can't look for a job on the internet because he "doesn't know what to put into a search term"
*Kacey says Sonichu is fanfiction, Chris says it's parody
*Chris lies that he'll look for a job where he works 10 hours a week, Kacey wants him to work 20, eventually he says okay to shut her up
*Kacey tells him not to wear his [[medallion]] to the [[job]] interview and not to draw on the applications; Chris sadly agrees that he won't.
*Chris thanks Kacey for yelling at him.

==Transcript==
 '''Chris:''' Hello?
 '''Kacey:''' Hi! It's Kacey!
 '''Chris:''' Hey Kacey! How are you?
 '''Kacey:''' I'm good. Um, how are you? Um, are you doing better?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I'm feeling better, thank you. I was waiting for you to call me.
 '''Kacey:''' Well, you just said around 11 to 11:30, so I gave you a few extra, you know, minutes just in case.
 '''Chris:''' I see. Yeah, I know, that's cool. I appreciate that. But it's like, you know. Yeah, I mean- I mean no hurry, but I mean, like, you know. I was waiting for the pleasure of talking to you.
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, uh, thank you.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, so uh, okay, let me go and get and my main questions I had written down in my little notebook out of the way. Um...
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, you have questions? Yeah, go ahead and ask them.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. Okay, this is an important one. You don't have any STD's, do you?
 '''Kacey:''' Chris, why would you ask me that?! Of course I don't!
 '''Chris:''' Okay, I'm sorry, I just-
 '''Kacey:''' [interrupts]I mean, you know I've only been with one person!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, well, I mean, I just felt like I needed to ask anyway.
 '''Kacey:''' O..okay, that's just...wow!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, okay, I'm sorry, I guess I wasn't up...[unintelligible]that wasn't a very good opening topic, I know, I'm sorry. It's just the first one I had on my thing here.
 '''Kacey:''' Okay, well I hope the rest of the questions aren't that bad!
 '''Chris:''' Uh, no, yeah well here, we'll do a 180 right here, um, yeah, let's, I think we talked about your education background a little bit, you, uh, you said you had honorable grades back in high school?
 '''Kacey:''' Yes, I was 4.0 all the way.
 '''Chris:''' Well that's good. Yeah, you got your diploma and all. Um, okay, did you, uh, ever get any, uh, awards? Um, like, you know right before graduation?
 '''Kacey:''' Um, yeah, like, um, I actually had a couple poems published, and um I actually graduated with way more credits than I needed so I got a merit certificate.
 '''Chris:''' [enthralled] You got a merit certificate?
 '''Kacey:''' Yes.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm. Tell me about that, what does that do for you?
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, it just goes with your diploma, it shows that you did way more than you needed to do, so, I got that and you know and I did like over 200 hours of community service, so, I got... It's just, it's just something that you.. it doesn't really do anything, I mean, awards in high school are nothing, I mean, they don't really help you ever in your life.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm. Yeah, but it's like, you know the achievement, it just makes you feel better, you know, I wish I would've gotten an award for my creativity back in high school.
 '''Kacey:''' I mean, I guess, but high school really doesn't do anything for you so it's not a big deal.
 '''Chris:''' Uh, it does a lot more than you, does a lot more than you think though, you know, I mean it, it's like, uh, it definitely readies you a little more for adult life, which is, uh, what you're gonna be leaving high school for.
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, but I mean nobody cares, they look at college all the time, college is way bigger of a deal.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, it is a big deal, I agree with that.
 '''Kacey:''' Um, so, any other questions?
 '''Chris:''' Well, okay well yeah, we'll move onto the next one.. hmm... yeah.. Oh yeah, um, what's yo.. uh, you drew your original Kacey in greek ink, uh, it's that like, uh, gel ink?
 '''Kacey:''' Um, yeah, it is a gel pen actually, it's just one of the pens I use for work.
 '''Chris:''' Oh, okay, you generally use a green ink pen, oh, that's.. that's interesting.
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, I like to use different colors.
 '''Chris:''' Hm. [pause] All colors of the rainbow, right?
 '''Kacey:''' [laughs] Yeah, definitely.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm, now there's my colorful gal.
 '''Kacey:''' [laughs] Well, Chris, remember, I'm just your friend.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I know, I'm just saying, you know, I'm just trying to be creati... be clever. 
 '''Kacey:''' [laughs] Okay, well, um, keep going with questions.
 '''Chris:''' Okay, hmm, do you like sudoku? Doin those sudoku puzzles on the paper?
 '''Kacey:''' No, I actually don't like sudoku, I'm really big into logic puzzles but I've never gotten into Sudoku, I don't like it.
 '''Chris:''' Well that's too bad. It's more on logic(?) you know, you basically just put one through nine in the one box, and then divide compared to the other boxes, the whole big nine box...
 '''Kacey:''' Right, I know what it is, I just don't like it.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm, yeah, okay, generally...
 '''Kacey:''' [interrupts] I'm more of a science person than a math person.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm, kay well you know you don't need math. I mean, it's like, okay, similarly you could do like Sudoku with the layers A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I. You could do letters A-I.
 '''Kacey:''' I guess, but I mean, I just really don't like it, so if we could move on to the next question, that'd be awesome. 
 '''Chris:''' Well, okay, what's your favorite board game?
 '''Kacey:''' Um, my favorite board game? Um, I haven't really played any in a long time, actually, so I mean...
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, of all the board games you've played?
 '''Kacey:''' Um, well the last thing I played was Catan.
 '''Chris:''' Catan? [Kacey interjects a "Yes."] I've never heard of that one.
 '''Kacey:''' You should look it up, you should google it, it's a really awesome game.
 '''Chris:''' Okay, is that spelled with a K?
 '''Kacey:''' Uh, no, it's C-A-T-A-N.
 '''Chris:''' Oh, kay-tawn, okay.
 '''Kacey:''' Kuh-tan.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, alright... so my favorite board game yet... I got a little bit into Monopoly, but, I don't... yeah, I mean I can call that like my second favorite board game, um, I don't, I mean, I guess... and plus, I mean, I have the original Sega Genesis cartridge, and you know, every once in a while I would play that, and I would beat the computer! [He seems proud of this.]
 '''Kacey:''' Oh, okay, cool... well, um, uh go ahead and keep going with the questions.
 '''Chris:''' Okay. Alright, well here's a fun one for you you might like. Did you have a favorite toy growing up?
 '''Kacey:''' A favorite toy? Um, yeah, my Easy-Bake Oven.
 '''Chris:''' Your Easy-Bake Oven?
 '''Kacey:''' Yeah, I loved that Easy-Bake Oven.
 '''Chris:''' Hah. Yeah, I can reali...I can recogn...I can understand that. Hah. Make the little small things with the little lightbulb, it's fun. Uh, my favorite toy is this little uh fisher-price Transformer, it was like you know my first transformer, so it's like, uh it's a little red indy racecar, that transforms into a little buddy, you actually gotta pop the guy's head in for the full transformation... [pause] so I was.. yeah that's pretty much... yeah you'd have to see it to pretty much get it, but... if you look it up, I'm sure you can find pictures...
 '''Kacey:''' Okay.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, fisher price.. hmm.. oh and something else, I think, I feel like I can probably make you feel comfortable with, to talk about, we can talk about some of your, uh, favorite potta-lickal issues, or we can talk about your favorite episodes of House or the office, and then uh, I'll just listen, take it all in, and learn about you more as a friend, you know?
 '''Kacey:''' Okay, well, um, let's do polla-tickle... political issues, why don't you start? 
 '''Chris:''' Alright..heh..um why don't I start.. I mean, you know more about politics than I do..uh.. *pause, then frustrated sigh. TRUE STRESS :(* I'm trying anyway, I'm trying to come up with a good political topic in my head right now.
 '''Kacey:''' Well, if you can't, I mean do you have any other questions?
 '''Chris:''' I mean, I just thought, you know.. Okay, what's the most recent political thing that's, you know, on your mind, now, at this point?
 '''Kacey:''' Um, probably healthcare, cause, you know, that's what I'm going to be doing.
 '''Chris:''' Oh, that's right, you're, uh, you're..[stammers] you're working towards getting your nurse degree.
 '''Kacey:''' Yup.
 '''Chris:''' Okay, um, we've talked about that a little before..hmm..yeah, let me see if I remember.. yeah, I think you kind of agreed with me with I said like, yeah... not everyone can afford healthcare, it's like you know...and assist... and then yeah.
 '''Kacey:''' Actually, Chris, I think you agreed with ME, because you didn't even know about reformed healthcare, you just knew about socialist healthcare.
 '''Chris:''' Hm. Yeah, that's true, I did agree with you. And then you kind of agreed with you know, when I was talking about my father and me going down to Tom Perriello's office and then he brought that up.. but yeah it was like agreeing with him about it as well, yeah and then you, we talked about it, and [something unintelligible] was agreeing too. 
 '''Kacey:''' Right... well do you have any other questions? Cause there's something on my mind that I really need to talk to you about.
 '''Chris:''' Oh! We could talk about that.
 '''Kacey:''' Okay, um, so you know all these trolls have been bothering me right?
 '''Chris:''' Oh, yeah.
 '''Kacey:''' So I was talking to my aunt about it, she's a nurse too, and you know she got really suspicious and, um, she googled your name, and you know, some of the things that the trolls have been saying, I think they might be true, I mean what is, you know, it's disturbing, and it's making me really uneasy especially since, you know you've said you think about me to such a degree, and I mean, it's just like... I mean, I know you've talked about the ED site before, but I mean, is a lot of that true? Like, why are you doing half those things in those videos? And, I thought you were anti-gay and you're drinking your own cum? It's gross, and it's just... it's bothering me!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, okay yeah, that is a whole bunch... that is a whole bunch of skeletons in my closet. 
 '''Kacey:''' But I mean, why would you do that? Do they make you do that?!
 '''Chris:''' Uh, no... As for the uh... yeah... I pretty much volunteered myself to be doing that, cause it was like, you know I considered it like recycling, so it's like, you know, I didn't have to lose it, and plus you know I read on the internet there was like health benefits.
 '''Kacey:''' Health benefits of what, of doing that?!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah.
 '''Kacey:''' There's no real health benefits, those are all myths, I mean it doesn't help your hair, doesn't help your nails, there's not enough protein in it. I mean, is that the whole reason you did it?
 '''Chris:''' Anyway, anyway, I've stopped.. anyway, I've stopped doing that months ago.
 '''Kacey:''' Well that's GOOD, but, I mean, there's no point in doing it. I mean... I... I... I mean especially not if you were so anti-gay. I mean, it's just, I mean most people would see that and say "Wow, this guy must be at least bisexual!"
 '''Chris:''' *sigh* Yeah, okay yeah, I can definitely see it from your point of view and I understand. *sigh* Yeah, but I take it like.. I learn from my mistakes, and... yeah... I've grown to the understanding and whatnot. Um, anyway, yeah, mostly like other stuff like you know the posts... and the videos, and me drawing, you know, I've drawn on my dick, and pictures of that, yeah...
 '''Kacey:''' Okay well, [Chris interjects saying "I was talking!"] Hey, no, no, let me go! Okay, another thing that really disturbed me is, apparently, you told these trolls that you, uh, that you shit yourself? I mean, what the hell Chris?
 '''Chris:''' [falsetto] Ehh, prettty much... I mean, I'm more in control of my bowel movements nowadays, and yeah, I... I do that less.
 '''Kacey:''' Well I mean... you're 27... do you just not make it to the bathroom?.. or, or what?
 '''Chris:''' Uh... Yeah, I just don't make it to the..bathroom quickly enough.
 '''Kacey:''' [incredulous] Wh... how how do you not know? Your body... gives you... you know... it lets you KNOW that... something... it's like, I mean, like when was the last time it happened if you're so in control?
 '''Chris:''' Okay, the last time it happened... yeah it was like three years ago.
 '''Kacey:''' Three years ago?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah.
 '''Kacey:''' Well it said that this happened recently so are these lies?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah they're, yeah they, yeah I would say they are exaggerating those. If it happened recently those are lies.
 '''Kacey:''' Okay okay but- [Chris chants 'the last time I' over and over] you've got to see that all this stuff is disturbing to me.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm. Yeah I can, yeah I can, I can relate to that. I can understand how you feel. Yeah. I-I would be uneasy too if I was, if I was, if I wasn't myself and I was reading that, you know, about myself or... yeah. [sighs] Most of the information they got on that ED page... [silence] it's like conned out of me, they conned out of me from pretending to be the past women I've talked to like Blanca, Vice or uh...
 '''Kacey:''' Okay buy you can't blame other people. Those people aren't near you. You can't say that they made you give them those videos. What- [Chris tries to interrupt] This is why your parents are mad at you right now!
 '''Chris:''' Yeah plus I was more gullible back then. And I'm, and [sheepish] I've been less gullible for the past few months. And now. [silence] I'm working on these things and I'm moving on from- I'm moving on and trying to put all that behind me. Plus, I've, I've got a responsible detective, uh, up in the FBI to take, to help, to help to towards the down-taking of the website and the downfall of the trolls!
 '''Kacey:''' OK, but still, Chris, I mean, Chris you need to understand this stuff is kind of disturbing, and I mean like, OK look, like I mean, like stuff you do in real life. Like, if most people touched me as much as you did, I would've gone off with them, but I mean, I'm trying to be polite because I know you have difficulties, and I mean that you, like you say "slow-in-the-mind", but I mean you've gotta understand you can't keep doing this shit.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I understand that... [pause] I understand that.
 '''Kacey:''' And besides, you keep saying that the cops don't care about things. I mean, you've really gotta let some of this stuff go! I mean, I mean don't be slow-in-the-mind with that! I mean, if they don't care they're not-they're never gonna help you, and even just one lone detective isn't gonna be able to do anything.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah... [stammers] Yeah also I did go to Tom [unintelligible] about that and talk to him about that.
 '''Kacey:''' Well, I mean, what exactly is he going to do? [Talking over Chris] And I mean, like, what about your councilors at church? I mean, do they know all this? Do they know this stuff?

{{transcription}}

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?gnxpnop8l3ldp15 mp3 of phonecall]

{{succession|label=Kacey Phone Calls|prevlink=[[Kacey Call 3]]|nextlink=[[Kacey Call 5]]}}

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category: Liquid Saga]]

I AM STRONG

2010-12-20T20:39:34Z

Wozblod:

[[Image:Martinezstrong.jpg|thumb|[[Joshua Martinez]] is also STRONG]]

"'''11012009 I AM STRONG'''" is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 1 [[November 2009]] in which he acts like he got muscles. (Spoiler: He [[fail]]s again.)

He also got a [[hair]]cut. [[Barbara Chandler|Chris's mom]] decided to go with the "elderly [[Homos|lesbian]]" look, as opposed to Chris's recent [[For Chris II|middle-aged manchild]] look. Also, notice Chris's profuse [[Stress|sweating]]. For his sake, we can only assume that he's trying his best to speak like a professional wrestler, even though he ends up sounding like Kermit the Frog with a sore throat.

The purpose of this video is vague, though it is likely that this video is an attempt to scare [[Clyde Cash]], whom Chris thinks is scared of flexing and talking in a funny voice.

== Video ==

{{Infobox/video
| name = I AM STRONG
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MmFtocrcDjM}}
| stardate = 1 [[November 2009]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}
| shirt = {{BlueLogoShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Greetings to Kacey's folks]]
| next = [[Twin Falling Towers]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[Image:Strong_Man.jpg|thumb|THIS IS WHAT CHRIS ACTUALLY BELIEVES]]

[''Chris reaches away from the camera, as "Eye of the Tiger" begins to play. For several seconds, he flexes his jelly-like arms, grunting enthusiastically. He coughs briefly from the effort before launching into his rant.'']

[''Trying to sound tough; sounds more like [[Wikipedia:Kermit the Frog|Kermit the Frog]]''] You tink you're so tough... [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|you think you're so tough]], no you are not! You are weak!

[''Chris points at the camera mockingly, in the fashion of [[Wikipedia:Hulk Hogan|Hulk Hogan]], a gesture he repeats throughout the video.'']

Dis battle is fer... this war is far from beyond over [[Clyde Cash|Mister Clyyyyyde]]! You got nothin'!

[''Chris holds out his fist, with the [[Amnyfest Ring]], in a menacing gesture.'']

YOU GOT NOTHIN'! You are weak and very powerless! I am the strong one! I AM STRONNNG! You back down! You... are a weakling! I AM THE STRONG, BUFF ONE! GRRRRR! ARRRRRRR!

[''Chris returns to posing and grunting until the video concludes.'']

==See also==
*[[30 Push-Ups]]
*[[11042009 51 50‎|51 50]]
*[[Chris Loses It]]
*[[CWCFighter]]
*[[Power]]
*[[A Workout]]
*[[A Hike]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jcSV3GMNxBA I AM STRONG MAN], a prophetic fan music video from two days earlier (based on [[10112009]] and [[10122009]])

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Greetings to Kacey's folks]]|nextlink=[[Twin Falling Towers]]|}}
{{Troll Videos}}
{{Power videos}}
{{Clyde Saga}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Chris Drops the N-Bomb

2010-12-20T18:23:48Z

Wozblod: Added unnoticed/unreported feature in the video.

[[Image:Chrischantwoface.jpg|thumb|Artist's interpretation of Chris between this and his previous video]]
[[Image:Tito2.jpg|thumb|left|Tito is shocked and saddened by Chris's choice of words.]]

'''Chris Drops the N-Bomb''' (officially posted as '''100_2151.MOV''') is a video uploaded on 17 March 2010, where [[Chris]] sends yet another gory [[death threat]], and uses the dreaded 'N-Word', at [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]]. It is also believed that this video was the reason that Jack Thaddeus pulled all of his funding from CWCipedia.

Unsurprisingly, Chris once again drops the name of the [[Wallflower]]. His actual explicit and complete usage of a racial slur, though, was unexpected; the closest he had previously come was singing "Don't Trust them Niggas over there" to [[Julie]] and when [[BlueSpike]] coerced him into saying it during their [[Julie Reveals Herself|final conversation]], where it took Chris several tries to get the word out (the best he could manage on his first attempt was "[[Niggo]]"). Furthermore, his usage of the middle finger in the final second of the video is unsurprising (albeit hard to notice given Chris's [[Chris and cinematography|notoriously awful camerawork]]) due to Chris's inability to express himself properly and thus must resort to extremes to express his disapproval.

It's well-known that Chris harbors racist feelings (based on reports of his behavior at [[The Game Place]], among other things), but they're not usually expressed so bluntly. The release of the [[Surfshack Tito E-mails]] on 18 March 2010, however, revealed that Chris has apparently grown quite fond of using the word as an insult.

To make matters worse, there hasn't been any indication that Surfshack Tito is actually black, or that Chris has any reason for thinking so. Tito's cartoon namesake is a Pacific islander, not ethnically African in any way, and Tito the troll bills himself as Hawaiian.

This being the case, it would seem that Chris is not only saying the N-word, but also believes that simply being called black is an insult in itself. Alternatively, Chris might just mentally lump anybody with brown skin into one generalized ethnic group, which would be about par for the course as far as his [[Autism|ability to recognize the human form]] is concerned.
{{clear}}

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}

{{Infobox/video
| name = 100_2151.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ICmPmA99AgM}}
| stardate = 17 March 2010
| subject = {{Racism|text}}, {{Violence|text}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
| shirt = {{TanWideLines|text}}
| previous = [[Happy Sonichu Day]]
| next = [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV]]
}}

===Transcript===

Tito! You stay away from [[The Wallflower|Heather]], you son of a bitch. You have no right taking her from me like that, you [[Chris and sex#Chris and rape|womanizing rapist]]! And if you go near her again, then I ''will'' find you! I will find you, I will [[Pocket knife|cut you up]], I will [[CWC Fighter|beat you up]], I will knock you on your backside, [[Chris and reality|stand on your gut like a log roller, and roll your fat right through your skull! Blowin' it wide open!]]

Because that's what you deserve, you God damn [[Chris and hypocrisy|womanizing raping]]... trollin' stupid [[Man in the Pickle Suit|pickle suited]]... '''nigger!''' And don't you ever, don't you dare contact me in my [[Surfshack Tito E-mails|E-mail]] again, or contact me ever! You stay away from me- You stay away from me and contact. Don't call me... I ''will'' find ''you''!

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = YOU...YOU...DOUBLE
| video = {{#ev:youtube|yaJwLL5mfg0}}
| Stardate = 18 March 2010
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info = [http://www.mediafire.com/?qnnxdz3im5d MP3]
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris says the N-word, and goes crazy
| video = {{#ev:youtube|rPe1pVKtCOc}}
| Stardate = 5 April 2010
| Maker = DrButler
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Happy Sonichu Day]]|nextlink=[[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV]]|}}

{{Template:Troll Videos}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

User talk:Ashki

2010-10-03T00:37:27Z

Wozblod:

{{Welcome|Trombonista}}

== Places to use like a forum... ==

See [[Template:Not A Forum]] for a list of appropriate places to discuss Chris. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 11:06, 21 September 2010 (PDT)
: Thank you very much. --[[User:Ashki|Ashki]] 17:20, 2 October 2010 (PDT)

== User Talk Pages ==

Do not remove messages from user talk pages. First and only warning. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 20:24, 1 October 2010 (PDT)
* It doesn't help when what's his face keeps trolling, just to let you know. Jesus. --[[User:Ashki|Ashki]] 20:24, 1 October 2010 (PDT)

Someone's butthurt...--trombonista 23:11, 1 October 2010 (PDT)
::* WHAT? /StoneColdSteveAustin. --[[User:Ashki|Ashki]] 17:20, 2 October 2010 (PDT)
:::*Agreed. Pfargtl9000 Spam & Eggs 15:16, 2 October 2010 (PDT)
::::*WHAT? --[[User:Ashki|Ashki]] 17:10, 2 October 2010 (PDT)

== You... ==

Must touch my penis... [[User:Wozblod|Wozblod]] 17:37, 2 October 2010 (PDT)

Clyde E-mails

2010-09-23T21:06:08Z

Wozblod: changed boxes to standard email and emailreply.

== Yo chris, check out Rabbichoso! It's gonna be big! 2/3/09 ==

{{Email|sonichu.info, sorry for hijacking your old domain man, but a man's gotta advertise you know?

anyway, this is what i've been working on for a while. just to let you know.

love clyde}}

{{EmailReply|Your pencil sketches are truly a sight.

...A Sight for Ventilation Cracks. Your drawings are just terrible and sketchy.

Peace,
Christian C.

P.S.

If Sarah is Truly with you right now, please ask her to e-mail me from her e-mail address very soon, so I can hear the Truth from her personal words.}}

== 2/17/09 ==

{{quotebox|Clyde, I thank you for your offer to help me in my situation, in the event of my parent's passing. I will accept your offer to help, and when you call my family, please feel free to introduce yourself to them, talk politely to them, and state your business calmly and slowly. I will listen to you, in writing, so I can better understand you. Thank you.

Peace,
Christian C.}}

{{Email|Chris, you've never accepted my help before, you've also ignored Vivian's advice.

I haven't seen any change in your lifestyle. I hate lies, you know.

My message to you is just a warning. I mean, most men your age would have already moved out...

- Clyde}}

== 2/24/09 ==

{{Email|We're sending Julie off to China in 9 hours.

You have failed me yet again, Chris-chan.

- Clyde}}

{{EmailReply|I have NOT failed you, sir, as a matter of fact, I am coming to Cleaveland tomorrow; I am preparing for my journey, my mind is set, and I have the support of God, my relatives and my friends. So quit trying to scare me, because it is NOT working; tomorrow morning, I am coming to Cleaveland, Ohio for Julie.

Christian C.}}

{{Email|I'll go buy the fanciest chocolate I can as I promised.

- Clyde}}

== 2/27/09 ==

{{EmailReply|I traveled an 800+ Mile Round Trip to Cleveland, Ohio, only to find at the address you gave me led me to a run-down old red house with an elderly woman residing in it, but not you nor Julie; no one in that neighborhood even heard of Julie nor Max.

Go ahead, Laugh it up, but I want to THANK YOU very much for the Traveling Expierence; I actually did have a GREAT TIME on the road, and enjoyed the sights and views. :)

Peace,
Christian C.}}

== Hi, Clyde 10/25/09 ==

{{EmailReply|I have a little something that I think you do not want spread around and around on the internet. A certain picture... "The itsy-bitsy spider went up the spout."

If you do not want this picture spread, then YOU DO AS I SAY.

I only ask for two things; a video on YOUR "TheGreggMays" YouTube where you SHOW YOUR TRUE FACE and TELL US ALL YOUR REAL NAME, WHERE YOU LIVE and that YOU are no better than a lowly catipiller with TRUE DETAILS ABOUT YOURSELF, and that you PROMISE, with BOTH HANDS facing the camera, that you will NEVER bother me, Christian Weston Chandler, or do any Villanous Trolling EVER AGAIN.

And the other thing is simply to cut yourself AWAY from the internet and LEAVE ME AND MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS ALONE FOREVER.

You have until October 26, 2009 at 11:30 PM. You fufill my wishes, and I Promise, Hand-To-God, to delete ALL traces of the picture from all my hard drives. If you do not, or fail to respond by the deadline, I'll show off your pic for all to see.

Live in Peace or Stress; Make Your Choice.

Sincerely,
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{Email|You don't have the balls to do anything.}}

== A real man fights with no weapons. 3/11/10 ==

{{Email|Also, you're still mad? God damn, it's been a year, get over it.

(She isn't dead. I lied about that to get you to stop pursuing her.)

If you actually did some research (which I knew you wouldn't do) the fires weren't even near Sarah. Congrats, you fail at everything.}}

{{EmailReply|You still raped her, and you got her pregnant, you bastard! I will never forgive you for that!}}

{{Email|It isn't rape if she enjoys it :D

Also my daughter's name is Penny. I'll make sure you never touch her you sick bastard.}}

== I have one request for you, Clyde. 3/13/10 ==
{{EmailReply|I still have full control over the PSN account I had originally created
for Sarah; considering you have a PS3 or two, and IF she really is
alive, I would like to hand over control of that account directly to
her. I've held onto it for over a year, so I'm not going to give it to
her through you.

All I ask is for SARAH, herself, to e-mail me within the next few days
from her old e-mail (@gmail.com) address, of which the account is
linked to. I want her to tell me in her own words, in great detail,
what had happened
since she and I last talked in December of 2008. And I want her to
attach a current .jpg photo of herself (a family photo with you and/or
"Penny" is optional).

After I have the full confirmation and confidence that it is her truly,
I will e-mail her the current password to her PSN, so then she may do
with it as she pleases; change the mailing address, update the e-mail,
change the password, etc. And I can feel better knowing I can
relinquish the account from my PS3 with her having full control of it.
ONLY I am on her Friends List, and I would appreciate it if it would
stay that way (do not remove me).

Clyde, if you permit me this one communication between her and me, I will forgive you for all of your misdeeds against me, and Sarah, and leave you all be peace (with you leaving me and mine be peace as well).

This is all I ask, so I can make certain she has been alive and well and move on with that little peace of mind.

I thank you for your time in reading this message, good sir. And I wish you a good and safe day.

Christian W. Chandler.}}

Talk:Chris and negotiation

2010-09-05T00:53:37Z

Wozblod:

==Deletion==
I really think there's not enough basis for this page. This is a really interesting topic but not really something encyclopedic and this really comes off as more of an essay sort of deal. I think a lot of this can be summarized in one sentence in [[autism]] that "Chris is incapable of seeing other people's point of view." Thoughts?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:36, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
:*Champthom, much like [[User:Beat|some other people]] is always right. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 16:51, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
:It might fit better in [[Chris and his Ego]] under Manifestations. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 16:57, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
::Actually, I think it would belong more so in [[Chris and Reality]]. Chris ALWAYS comes to the conclusion that if someone, even a troll, makes a promise, they absolutely have to and will live up to that promise. It's like with the recent "Break your PS3 for 9000 dollars" deal or when Max was holding "Julie" hostage. Basically, a case of unrealistic expectations. --[[User:Miss Noel|Noel Ari Paige]] 23:26, 3 September 2010 (PDT)

Actually this page came as a request from yoko after this last saga, I was going to put it together myself, after a bit more of the events recent events are made "public", but I see someone's jumped the gun and started it without me. There's plenty of material that can go into the article that has it's own merit, mostly involving the frustrations many trolls experience in manipulating the 2010 era Chris, who cares only for his PS3. I'll see what I can do to improve the article with some REDACTED materials, but yeah, this article is a special request, so we should improve it rather than throw it out. --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 17:12, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
*I know Yoko requested it but that doesn't mean it should be done. I really dislike these sort of pages because while they're interesting, they're more or less opinion pieces and mostly opinion. It's junk food - it tastes good but it's not good for you.
:If we REALLY had to do this article, I'd focus more on times Chris has had to negotiated, how he did so, and the outcome versus the intended income as opposed to going on about why Chris can't compromise and tactics (the latter I would briefly visit, see if there are actual tactics here. Some [[Wikipedia:game theory|game theory]] would be useful here). But frankly, I really don't see why this deserves an entire article on a narrow topic and the fact that this can be summarized as "Chris can't negotiate."--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:49, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
** The way it is phrased now I can see what you mean champ, but I'd give it a couple days before acting on it. It's getting a lot of work and it just popped up, there is absolutely documentation of this shit, it just has to be synced up with the article. Whatever you do is what you do, but give it a little bit and see what it turns into. It isn't some furry's shitty self insert Sonichu fanfic, its something that at its core is intended to be relevant to Chris and is meant to serve a purpose. [[User:Sully|Sully]] 23:07, 3 September 2010 (PDT)
*Again, a lot of the reason that yoko and I wanted the article done was to highlight recent events and show what it's like to deal with Chris on an inter-personal basis. It's a common misconception among younger trolls that we just tell Chris to do something, and then he goes out and does it. In reality, it's all dependent on his whims and motivations. The problem is, this is very obvious in some of the more recent events that can't be added to the cwciki yet. This article got started a few weeks too early, and right now it's just serving as a repository of how Chris has dealt with trolls in the past. I'm considering what you said about intent vs outcome, and that might be a good way to go. As it stands right now, I separated the article into examples and Chris' usual tactics, and I see people have been kind enough to flush them out for me. I'm going to sleep on it, and think about how to proceed. I see what your saying Champ, but do we have a place on the wiki to document what interacting with Chris is really like? --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 00:41, 4 September 2010 (PDT)

==Other Bargaining situations==
Back when Chris was being black mailed into singing okay to be gay/humping his ps3. he kept demanding that Jack gave him the names of the people that worked on the psn. The only reason Jack kept making him sing the song was cause he was doing it wrong/changing the lyrics. Might wanna read the Samantha emails to get the better details[[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 22:40, 3 September 2010 (PDT)

Gotta write about the whole Audiobook profit negotiation with Vivian. I'm not doing it because my english sucks major balls. [[User:Loserbrain|Loserbrain]] 08:06, 4 September 2010 (PDT)

Dont forget to add in the whole "knock you up 2 points on my scale of respect" email to MLW and some other women at PVCC. That is a major piece of what makes chris so damn rage-worthy. It is a shining example of Chris and Negotiation. [[User:Wozblod|Wozblod]] 17:53, 4 September 2010 (PDT)

Talk:ModNation Racers

2010-07-29T09:02:14Z

Wozblod:

So what information do we have so far on this shit? We know he's asking for bonus material, and we know he's posting on GameFaqs about it. Anything else?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:08, 28 May 2010 (UTC)

He put like 8-16 screencaps of his Sonichu kart and devoted an entire CWCipedia update to this. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 02:53, 28 May 2010 (UTC)
:Before or after the Archive Cogs made, because if after, then good luck finding it now.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:06, 28 May 2010 (UTC)
::Here: http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Original_CCWC_Art - he considers this "original art". Basically he has a yellow car with his initials on him and has made a racer with a slight resemblance to him. This is from the beta, so who knows what kind of crap he's made since the game has been released. I'm going to put one screencap in the article and leave it at that. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 03:10, 28 May 2010 (UTC)

Oh damn, look at how '''badly''' made the Chaotic Combo is. Buy hey, it's Chris; no matter what the tool is, he'll use it to foist his godawful shit on the world. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 19:36, 27 July 2010 (UTC)
== Dear God... ==

I had a feeling that Chris would get his hands on ModNation Racers. God knows what crap he'll put up on the Internet...--SpaceScreaminJohn 14:59, 3 June 2010 (UTC)

== He has his Beta Track Up ==

As well as some actually neatly recreated Hot Wheels vehicles. He locked a couple of them; the manchild must have Favorited those TWO cars from his collection. LOL His track is lengthy, and confusing, but I managed to run some laps on it. And he added a good version of the Park with a fountain, and a Beach.

Download his Beta Cwcville Track for the laughs of using the defaulted Beta Tools.--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 22:24, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

:I think "manbaby" is more appropriate than "manchild", given that he soils himself so much. But anyway, thanks for keeping us updated on his movements and activities. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 22:59, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

::I was watching an episode of Ghost Adventures and they were in this haunted mansion/abandoned hospital place, and there was a ghost there that they called the 'manbaby', and I kept thinking 'lolchris' [[User:Leekduck|Leekduck]] 23:02, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

:I don't have a copy of ModNation or a PS3, so is there any way you could make a video of the new tracks and provide some commentary? That would be great! --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 23:10, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

::I agree with Anaconda here. I would love to download his track for laughs of using defaulted Beta Tools, but I do not have the game. If you would upload a video of them, Jinkies, I'm sure it would contribute Greatly to the LULZ. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 00:13, 14 July 2010 (UTC)
:::We should probably handle this like we handle the LBP levels, get some screenshots and summaries up on the page. Jenkins, you're the only one that's played them so far, would you mind adding the level names and a brief description of each to the page?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 00:21, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

:I wouldn't call anything the manbaby did "good" or "neatly recreated", since he has never had an original thought in his tiny retarded brain. Except the attraction sign, and we all know how that turned out. That, and it probably is a piece of crap like his other stuff. I would like to see it, too. I second the video idea. --[[User:Mp83|Mp83]] 00:23, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

Who gives a shit about this bullshit except for how much money Chris is blowing on this. seriously, he spends so much money. I remember during the GoW bullshit that he spent like 20 bucks on stupid dlc. i bet he's already lost like 30 bucks trying to get those mystery mods or whatever. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 00:44, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

== Pictures of his shitty creations? ==

On his profile page there are images of his shitty creations. Should they be screencapped and put in this article for future reference in case he leaves Modnation? I'm grabbing pictures of them now, but I know shit all about editing wikis and how to put them in the article neatly. - [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 03:48, 18 July 2010 (UTC)

: The reason I suggest it is that despite abandoning things like the Sonichu medallion, he still insists on putting his bullshit creations everywhere. One of his cars is even SonChu for fucks sake. - [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 03:51, 18 July 2010 (UTC)

I think yes,as they will be easy to access this way and there will be no risk of losing them if he does end up leaving Modnation. --[[User:MEANWHILE|MEANWHILE]] 02:40, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
:Or getting banned for making the 'Be My Sweetheart' car. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 03:38, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
::Making a collage that contains all his created characters shouldn't be that hard. I'm not doing anything right now, so I'll give it a shot. Might look like ass though.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 17:26, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
:::Pictures of all cars and drivers added. They're just screencaps from the website though. It would be neat if someone downloaded them all and got us some high quality pictures from their PS3 but 1.) I'm not sure how that would even work and 2.) It probably would be a giant pain in the ass.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 22:25, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

His Twitter updates say the 2.0 version of the track is up. Is anyone going to get it and document it? [[User:Mellowyellowsalvation|Mellowyellowsalvation]] 20:20, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
:I really doubt anybody on here owns this game.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 22:25, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

::Yeah, most CWCki users are over the age of seven. This is a kiddie game. In other words, it's exactly the kind of childish crap that Chris will waste his summer and life on. What a pathetic and lonely life he has. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 23:16, 19 July 2010 (UTC)
:::I don't know about it being a kids' game. I played a demo of the game for the PSP, and it looks to be a decent kart-racing game, if you are interested in that. Regardless, I would like to see someone put up a video of Chris's custom-made track. --SpaceScreaminJohn 01:28, 20 July 2010 (UTC)

:I might get a copy if I can find it cheap used. The demo was fun enough. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 00:46, 20 July 2010 (UTC)

== "posted threads on both GameFAQs and Gamespot" ==

Which threads are you referring to? --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 08:09, 20 July 2010 (UTC)
:[http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:VInM-kX7oLIJ:www.gamefaqs.com/boards/960619-modnation-racers/55632118+site:gamefaqs.com+ChrisCSonichu&cd=6&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us Found one.] Deleted for Chris being Chris. --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 08:13, 20 July 2010 (UTC)
:[http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:aj6YV7WonMAJ:www.gamefaqs.com/boards/960619-modnation-racers/55642892/613903000+site:gamefaqs.com+ChrisCSonichu&cd=12&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us Found another.] Apparently Chris is unaware (once again) that he is illicitly soliciting.
:[http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:yWiY6pfFf4YJ:www.gamespot.com/ps3/driving/modnationracers/show_msgs.php%3Ftopic_id%3Dm-1-55632118%26pid%3D960619+site:gamespot.com+ChrisCSonichu&cd=15&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us Found on GS.] Despite their more lax policy, this thread was also DELETED.
:[http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:5f_JKQ6WA1kJ:www.gamespot.com/ps3/driving/modnationracers/show_msgs.php%3Ftopic_id%3Dm-1-55642892%26pid%3D960619+site:gamespot.com+ChrisCSonichu&cd=16&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us Nothing new at all.] Yeah, I just wasted precious sleep time. --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 08:27, 20 July 2010 (UTC)
::Screencaps made. I guess I'll upload them?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 19:08, 23 July 2010 (UTC)
There is no point in uploading the gamespot ones if you are going to upload the gayfags one. They both share the same forum postings or whatever. Essentially they're the same. [[User:Wozblod|Wozblod]] 09:02, 29 July 2010 (UTC)

User talk:Xanabit

2010-07-28T08:26:32Z

Wozblod:

==Not A Forum==

{{Not A Forum}}

CWCki talkpages are not forums. Discontinue using talk pages for discussion. Your Autism is no excuse. --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 03:17, 23 June 2010 (UTC)

==Your Fan Art==

I just want to tell you that your fan art is awesome and much appreciated. You don't know how satisfying it is for me to see pictures of those [[Sonee & Rosey|little fuckers]] being brutally tortured/murdered. : ) --[[User:Alcoholic Legend|Alcoholic Legend]] 00:56, 24 June 2010 (UTC)
::Thanks, I just wish I was a better artist. The horrible sadness is Chris has had more practice drawing since graduating high school than I have. :( --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 01:01, 24 June 2010 (UTC)
:::I like the way you draw them. It helps me feel less sorry for them.-[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 00:52, 25 June 2010 (UTC)
:You have given nightmares and for that i salute you.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 00:56, 25 June 2010 (UTC)

Hey, just wanted to tell ya I saw all the stuff you drew on /cwc/ and think it's just as awesome as the story art. The Father's Day picture (one of my favorites) alone would be enough to get Chris angry (although I don't know if he'd respond anymore). Nicely Done. : ) --[[User:Alcoholic Legend|Alcoholic Legend]] 08:33, 27 June 2010 (UTC)

You have won my respect with your fan art. May I fellate you? --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:53, 1 July 2010 (UTC)

==The Comic==

I actually really enjoyed it. It's one of the few <s>troll</s> TRUE and HONEST comics I've really liked aside from Asperchu. You sir are good people. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 07:48, 6 July 2010 (UTC)

===This concerns all of us, man===
I just think you should know that Cogs is enacting a new policy regarding fan works that can be read [[CWCki:Policy|here]]. Also, there's some fairly ugly (and barely literate) backlash going on against the torture stories happening at the discussion page on ''Afternoon'', and some support would be greatly appreciated. If you'd like to stay out of it, though, I completely understand. --[[User:Manwithoutabody|manwithoutabody]] 19:43, 12 July 2010 (CEST)

== /cwc/ ==

I can save some of those pictures if you'd like me to.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 01:23, 16 July 2010 (UTC)
:Save to your computer? Go right ahead. But if you're talking about uploading them here, there's a reason why I didn't do it myself. I'm waiting for all this drama surrounding the fan section to die off. So far it's only a few fanfics were deleted, but I have no idea what's still to come. No sense continuing to upload images only for them to be taken down in the next week or so. Besides, there's talk of starting a whole new wiki for fanworks, it'd make more sense to put 'em there. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 02:18, 16 July 2010 (UTC)
::Yes, I meant to my computer. Most of the pictures are way over 150 kb, so I wouldn't upload them here anyway.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 15:34, 16 July 2010 (UTC)
:::The earlier ones I posed on /cwc/ weren't resized and were saved as png files, so yeah they're all around 1.5MB. The later ones, starting with page 22, and all the ones I already uploaded, were shrunk down and saved as JPGs. Also, I'm going to be going through every page to make minor revisions when I'm done. Polish some of the coloring, edit the dialog, that kind of thing. I'm also going to change Heather's dialog so it's entirely in Spanish (there's a reason for this everyone will find out soon). --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 21:13, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

== Flipnote, Vote padding, Drugs and your local government... ==
I noticed you edited the Flipnote Hatena concerning the labyrinth flipnote and Chris's star spam. I really doubt that this changes anything, but I do recall that at one point it was around 2k or something and then after a week or so I checked back in and it was at 9001 for a while. I think that although Chris has taken liberty to star his own shit but I also think that at some point a fuckin' retard decided to meme it up and spam some stars chris' way. How much is a unknown. Could've been less than a hundred or over several thousand. I only mention this because I think that not all are the result of Chris (my theory is Chris did 60-80%). Kind of hard guessing with numbers and it wasn't really relevant, but I think that you might interested in it slightly.

Also, I must say that you are doing a awesome job at the comics you are uploading to /cwc/. I always look forward to your uploads. I have been wondering about the Fear and Loathing in CWCville comic that (i think) you FedEX'd to Chris; did he receive it? is it possible for you to know that it was received or sent back? I am interested in knowing its status. Oh also but I don't know if you remember me and my 1 or 2 requests in your threads on /cwc/, but I am ttly not a perv or creeper. I made the requests under the assumption that they weren't creepy or anything but I see that it is pretty ambiguous. I should've had more tact in crafting my requests, or better yet, not make them at all.

Thanks for reading through all my bullshit here and keep up the great work you are doing. [[User:Wozblod|Wozblod]] 08:26, 28 July 2010 (UTC)

Talk:6 June 2010

2010-06-08T20:59:37Z

Wozblod:

Fool that I am, I think I might actually transcribe this... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 03:31, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*I will take the second half of DIS BITCH. This is an urge I cannot control. Also what the fuck Chris is fucking stalking Snyder now goddammit.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:58, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Sorry, I finished it up before I saw your update. I sincerely apologize if you listened to any of this shit unecessarily. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 04:06, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*You did a good job! I did do some transcribing before I realized you had finished it, but honestly I needed the practice anyway.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:03, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

== To do ==

Add Michael Synder's comment from YouTube that sparked this (see Da update for it). --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:32, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
* Done. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 04:29, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

== Rename dis bitch ==
If a video does not have a proper name, you name it after the date it went up. This should be "6 June 2010". What is so goddamn hard about this?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:00, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*Whathisname usually figures out how to treat shit, that's why I named it that. That's why. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:02, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Now that I know Champ made the page, I feel bad about my first comment.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:03, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*You are forgiven, my son. Happens to the best of us.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:21, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

==I'LL RUN YOU OVER DEAD==

This is the second time that we know of that Chris has tried to commit vehicular homicide. I get the feeling that at this rate, he's going to get himself <s>v@</s> V& by the end of the year. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 07:40, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Chris is going to be vat'd, huh? -[[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 10:00, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*Probably. They need to do ''something'' to get the stank out of him. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 10:44, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::*Still - this is only one version of the events. For all we know he could be exaggerating the entire situation - but I like to think we get the TRUE and HONEST version of events sometimes. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 12:23, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

==Add to relevant article?==
"Right, if I had the right mind, I would send, I would give him a charge of verbal, serve him a charge of verbal harassment!"
This right after he tried to take a picture of some guy to use as a dartboard, drove (presumably) drunk, took pictures without the person's consent, nearly ran two people over, and then thought he could bitch about it on the internet. Is this Chris and Law or Chris and Reality? [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 14:56, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

The key theme here is that it's innocent behavior when Chris does it. I suggest Chris and Hypocrisy or Examples of Chris's Ego.
[[User:CWCspatcher|CWCspatcher]] 15:01, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
Although this definitely merits mention on Chris and the Law as well, as prime evidence of his mentality that the law is not meant for punishing him in any circumstance. [[User:CWCspatcher|CWCspatcher]] 15:04, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*Not to mention Death Threats.--[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 11:25, 7 June 2010 (EST)

==Stalking==

According to Wikipedia, which is always right, "[s]talking can be defined as the willful and repeated following, watching, and / or harassing of another person." Chris has been banned from the The GAMe PLACe. He's gone back repeatedly, each time being told to leave and never come back. He admitted to planning to go willfully back this time in order to watch and photograph Michael Snyder. It's not necessarily a crime, but it does seem to constitute stalking by a reasonable definition. I just think it should be noted that it's not just troll puffery to call it that. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 16:54, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Considering Chris's history of holding grudges against people he considers "enemies", him stalking people "offending" him is not out of the question. --[[User:DrunkenDemomang|DrunkenDemomang]] 04:06, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Snyder's input==

Any chance we can get a hold of Mike and get his side of the story? He might appreciate it too if we got that and put it up here so everyone and his grandmother doesn't call and ask him. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 17:07, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:I sent him a message on Youtube, if I get a response (unlikely) I'll screencap it and add it to the article. If anyone knows a more direct way to contact him, it would be great to get the whole story from him.--[[User:Star Platinum|Star Platinum]] 19:40, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::Perhaps Mimms or Lucas would know a way of getting ahold of him. Of course, you'd need to get ahold of Mimms or Lucas first, but that would seem to be an easier feat considering their past cooperation with certain websites. --[[User:shearod|shearod]] 22:36, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::I'm in the process of asking Mimms if he knows anything about this. I'll post what I find. [[User:Meat Miracle|Meat Miracle]] 23:13, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::*Mimms doesn't know, but he said he can ask Michael. [[User:Meat Miracle|Meat Miracle]] 02:12, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==At the bar with a Bud and a DS==

I was re-reading the transcript of the video when these little things starting nagging me; who goes in a bar with a DS and why it sounds oh-so-familliar coming from Chris? Then, I had an insight; is there a possibility that Chris found in bars a new prowling ground for his "Love-Quest"? He had the same attitude at the local McCrap and Target but without the alcohol.[[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 17:11, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Maybe he's taking his parent's approach of meeting da ladies. After all, Barb and Bob met at a bar. -[[User:DrunkenDemomang|DrunkenDemomang]] 16:25, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::Maybe he'll finally meet his sweetheart at the same age as Bob, when both parties out out of their prime and desperate enough. Of course, it would take a ''really'' desperate girl to get with Chris. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 20:29, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::Don't be silly. Chris won't live anywhere near as long as Bob has so far. I predict he'll die of a heart attack in his mid fifties. Maybe forties. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 21:41, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::::I'm also guessing 40. He eats fast food every day and he does nothing but sit on his ass. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:17, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::::That's not true. Sometimes he stands up to play Guitar Hero and threaten the internet. -[[User:Schismtracer|Schismtracer]] 15:29, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Made up at the spot?==
Does anyone else think Chris's story sounds like it was made up at the spot at some parts? --[[User:Shotaru|Shotaru]] 23:27, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:Chris is a pathological liar, so I wouldn't put it past him. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:34, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:I doubt it. We have that post from June 4th by someone claiming to be Snyder saying Chris was taking pictures of him. Although I doubt Chris's testimony about what happaned especially after Micheal came out of the Game Place its right there his voice gets higher to the point where I can tell he is lying.
::Lucas and Mimms said that TheRcholic is indeed Mike way back when [[100 2178]] was uploaded. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 02:05, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:::I think most of what he's saying here is true, or at least the general concept. That said, if I had a daughter, and I saw someone like Chris hanging around with a camera, you had better believe I would assume the worst.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:27, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:Chris is a bad liar. There's way too much details. He was drinking ONE beer at a local bar with his DS and a camera for ONE hour. Then, he decided ON THE SPOT to go take a picture of Michael for an inexistent dartboard? My bullshit detector was on the red right passed time 1:34. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 03:03, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Well then, mine broke. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 03:13, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Robotnik==

I haven't played any Sonic games since ''Sonic & Knuckles'', but, by Chris's own admission, pretty much what happened is that he was sneaking around doing something he shouldn't, jumped into a machine to try to beat the good guy, and ultimately failed. Not to mention that his torso is really fat and round and his limbs are really skinny. It just seems to me that Chris is getting more and more like Dr. Robotnik as time goes on. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 07:34, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
*So he'll say "I'MMMMMMM STRAIIIIIIGHT YOU TROLLLLLSSSS!" every time we win? Awesome.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 08:57, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:: Yeah, kinda like that. And eventually he'll get fed up of going after <s>Sonic</s> the trolls by himself and build two humorously incompetent robot henchmen. Except by "building," I mean "inflating," and the robots are actually his blow-up dolls Kimmi and Officer Nasty.

:: Hey, Clyde's hair is even spiky. Just dye it blue and you have an instant hero. Maybe Liquid can be Tails or something, I dunno. It would be just like AoStH, except "Robotnik" has no wacky schemes, isn't really actively pursuing destroying the hero, and has a fucking terrible singing voice. [[User:Lord Snotfolus|Lord Snotfolus]] 09:37, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

:::As opposed to the real Robotnik, who sings like an Angel. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 15:33, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

:::Make it so, number two. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 16:38, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Police Report==
There must be one. I don't know any free service to get the record, but if anyone does, toss it up. Alternatively, if someone is willing to use a pay service to get at it, it might make somebody here love you. Not me though. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 17:46, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
* Keep an eye on [http://www.criminalsearches.com/details.aspx?id=w1x00xC8&vw=criminal&1=IgL6lgJ0ciJdZHqNItwC9IIt79kNs2z0bXy0js2l1aI%3d&input=name this page]. It has Chris's other crimes, so it may be updated later. [[User:HermanoBluth|HermanoBluth]] 19:58, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Am I the only one that noticed this?==
I noticed the absence of not only the medallion but also the amnyfest ring. Usually this means that this isnt TRUE and HONEST content, right? Or is there some other mitigating circumstance? I am not going to edit the article to highlight this as I doubt that no one hasnt noticed these things missing. I am just interested on you guys' take on this. Thoughts? [[User:Wozblod|Wozblod]] 20:59, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9

2010-05-13T17:50:56Z

Wozblod:

'''Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9''' is the ninth call between Chris and Alec, which took place 25th February 2010.

==Summary==
The call begins with [[Alec]] asking [[Chris]] how his birthday was and then asking about his reasoning behind the recent disturbing developments in [[Sonichu 10]]. Alec points out some notable [[hypocrisy]] in regards to Chris's use of [[Chris and anger|violence]] in issue 10, given that Chris has criticized the [[Asperchu]] and Sonichu Revolution comics for using a lot of violence. Alec goes on to call out Chris for trying to weasel out of the conditions he had agreed to in earlier phone calls and telling him off for not listening to him...again.

Chris defends his actions with the always amazing excuse that "he was still filled with anger," which, you know, totally makes everything O.K. Alec also points out that "apologizing" is not quite equal to "violently murdering the people you wronged in your shitty comic." The two argue about the issue of [[Simonla]], and the fact that Chris didn't exactly kill her in the manner promised AND introduced the character "Sandy", Simonla's daughter, defeating the entire purpose of eliminating Simonla. They discuss [[copyright]] and Chris's misunderstanding of the concept, in addition to Chris's massive [[ego]].

Chris-chan's Love Day is brought up. Chris denies ripping off ''Independence Day'' and claims that trying to make his own birthday a national holiday isn't completely unreasonable in any way, shape or form. Chris states that the Mexican Flag Day (which is coincidentally the same day as his birthday) "could be better," which implies that it "could be better" by celebrating his birthday on a national level AND he says that there should be a second day in addition to Valentine's Day to celebrate love and his birthday "just feels right." When Alec mentions that he's definitely creating a dumb ass cover-up for wanting his own birthday to be a holiday, Chris dances around the question like a drunken retard ([[Alcohol|how fitting]]).

Chris also admits he likes it when people kiss his ass, which has been [[Ego|kind of obvious]] for a long time. He then proves he knows nothing of Christianity ([[Religion|also obvious]]). Chris also admits he believes Simonla has always been his and tries to explain why it's not O.K. to [[parody]] a parody (it's as retarded as it sounds). In addition, Alec catches Chris in another [[lie]] about how many pages he had done. Chris blames the [[trolls]].

The call appears to end with Chris hanging up mid-sentence.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9 Part 1
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|_Ae7T05cIJQ}}
| Stardate = 18 February 2010
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Alec]]
| Saga = {{Asperchu}} [[Asperchu]]
| previous = [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]]
| next = Current
}} </center>

===Transcript===
'''Alec:''' Hey Chris, it's Alec.

'''Chris:''' Oh. Hi, Alec. I was not...

'''Alec:''' Hey, Happy birthday!

'''Chris:''' [''Annoyed''] I wasn't- okay, well I was not expecting you.

'''Alec:''' Yeah, yeah.

'''Chris:''' So, thank you.

'''Alec:''' Yeah. Yeah, how was, how was your birthday today?

'''Chris:''' My birthday was yesterday, and it was, it was, it was good.

'''Alec:''' Oh, oh, it was, it was yesterday?

'''Chris:''' I spent it with my family. Yeah.

'''Alec:''' Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Well, yeah, I saw the pages you got uploaded today. Um, yeah... Uh... What's up with that trial, Chris? That was kinda like, that was kind of, uh, out of left field. That was... I didn't expect that at all.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, you drew, you drew, you, uh, drew me, you drew, you drew me in a set-, in a setup of, uh, the, of uh, being beared false witness from uh, from your, from your parody of my Sonichu. In, uh, comparison of uh, that, of the [[Liquid Chris|other Chris]] being the real one and not me, which I was the real deal. And then you set me on fire. And then recently, you per-, you portrayed me getting my head getting chopped off with a sawblade! With gory detail!

'''Alec:''' Chris, you didn't read that, that last page. Did you read the, um, the page? 'Cause, what happened there was, um, that was a picture of the real you in the comic, and I said, you know, like your head got chopped off but then you came right back and said "No, it's okay, we're just faking". I didn't, your head didn't actually get chopped off.

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Alec:''' Yeah.

'''Chris:''' Okay, it could maybe have more obvious.

'''Alec:''' Well, if you read the text it would have been obvious. You know.

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Alec:''' It, there was a lot, there was text there, I mean, I spelled it out. I specifically had you say "Don't worry, this is fake!", you know, "My head's not really chopped off. I'm fine." You know, um, you accuse me of using, er, well, not accused, of using violence, I do use violence, that's true. But I was just kind of, uh... It seems kind of weird that your comic has suddenly taken a ''very'' gory turn. I mean, like...

'''Chris:''' [''Interrupting''] It's just, it's just, it's just [[Sonichu Special 4|one time]].

'''Alec:'''But you said violence is wrong, though. One time's...

'''Chris:''' [''Interrupting again''] But I... Yeah, well, you, you, you did violence unto me, I was just returning the favor.

'''Alec:''' Oh, revenge is okay, though? Chris, you said violence is wrong. You didn't say it's okay in the case of revenge. [''long pause''] And, I'm kinda, I'm kinda curious, why is this trial taking place? Like, why are Alec and Mao and me, er, Alec and Mao and uh, Evan and Sean, uh, why are we on trial?

'''Chris:''' [''takes a smug tone''] Okay, let me see. The, uh, copy-, copycat, the whole bunch of copy-, copycat of practically everything from my, nearly everything from my books. Set me on fire, chopping my head off, false witness, and uh, oh yeah, how about wanting to kill Simonla Rosechu?

'''Alec:''' Um... Do you remember all the times we talked about Simonla? Where I explained to you that I wanted you to kill her because she's not your character, and Evan wanted her gone from your comic?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Alec:''' Chris, you told me, you swore up and down to me that, that you understood the point I was trying to get across to you and that you understood what I...

'''Chris:''' [''Interrupting yet again''] Yeah I did, yeah I did understand that. Yeah I-

'''Alec:''' [''Shutting Chris down''] Well, no! You're lying to me, Chris. You obviously didn't.

'''Chris:''' No, I did, I did...

'''Alec:''' [''Refusing to put up with Chris's bullshit excuses''] God Chris, I can't believe, I cannot believe you did this Chris. You, you know I thought that you were just, you know, kinda going "Yeah, uh-huh" just mouthing along and pretending to understand and saying what I wanted to hear to get me off the phone. And you know, I said that to you. I asked you, "Are you doing that?" And you said "No," you said no. You, you promised you understood, you would comply, you believed what I was saying. But then this trial comes along and what you're telling me right now is apparently my words went in one ear and out the other with you. And you think that, that me and Evan did something wrong to you. You think that you have done nothing wrong? Do you seriously believe that we are, you know, antagonists and that you are just a saint here?

'''Chris:''' Hmmm. Let me think about that a moment. To ask my question best.

'''Alec:''' Okay, well, while you're thinking about it, remember: Don't tell me the answer that you think I want to hear. Tell me what you really believe. That's the answer that I actually want to hear, is what you really believe.

[''Tense pause. Chris is watching South Park in the background.'']

'''Alec:''' You know, I'm looking at... Uh, the page here where you had like 10 people simultaneously electrocute me. Sonichu says [''wimpy voice''] "Oh I'm not gay!"

[''Chris attempts to respond, Alec drowns him out.'']

'''Alec:''' Chris, how many times, how many times did I tell... Okay, another thing, apparently, you didn't listen to. How many times did I tell you that I never portrayed Sonichu as gay? I explained clearly to you. Because you thought that he and Asperchu are gay, and I explained to you, "No, they're just, they were just hugging because they're friends, they're close friends." And I thought that you understood that, but... Go ahead.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, but like it'd be, but the portrayal could be misconstr-, construed, especially with the, uh, all the pink, all the pink-hearted drawings that you did...

 '''Alec:''' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you did misconstrue it.

'''Chris:''' And the one, and the one where they were, the one where they were lying next to each other, in a bed situation...

'''Alec:''' Okay, okay, you did misconstrue it. That's true. And then you brought that up to me, and then I explained to you what it really meant. And now you apparently ignored that and just, you say, Sonichu says, "eeewww, you're portraying me as gay." I'm not portraying Sonichu as gay. I've never done that. The only gay characters in my comic are Wild and Simonchu... Well, Simonchu's bisexual. And, uh, I think that's it right now, actually. Well, Mitch, Mitch is gay in my comic. Although I haven't shown him having a lover yet. You know, none of my fans misunderstood that.

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' I mean, not that it really matters, because the point is that you misunderstood it, you brought it up to me, and I explained it to you. I don't care that you misunderstood something, what I care about is that you apparently didn't even listen when I explained it to you. Because anybody can misunderstand something, but you brought it up to me, I explained it to you, and you made it sound like you did understand. But apparently you didn't.

'''Chris:''' Actually, I did understand, but I still had the anger and rage, I still had the anger against you. And I wanted to bear, I wanted to...

'''Alec:''' No! No. Why? Why would you have anger against me? If I explained...

'''Chris:''' One, uh, one big reason is continuing the adverts, continuing the blasphemous advertisements on my CWCipedia against me. Those are like...

'''Alec:''' [''shouting over Chris''] Oh, really? Hey, hey, hey, do you remember when I explained to you...

'''Chris:''' Especially, especially the ones declaring my birthday as Asperchu Day...

'''Alec:''' HEY! Chris. Chris! Do you remember when I explained to you last time that my ads are staying up there because you completely insulted me, and didn't respect what I wanted you to do in the apology video? But what you're saying me now is, you think that the ads are an attack on you. You're just completely forgetting what I told you before. Or maybe you're not forgetting it, maybe you're just choosing to disregard it. They were a direct consequence of your actions. You had the power to get rid of the ads and you did nothing. So how can you be mad at me for having the ads up? [''pause''] When I gave you several ways out, and you didn't take them?

'''Chris:''' Well, at least I, at least I, when, at least I went by your request and put, and hand-wrote all the apologies and everything, and killed Simonla.

'''Alec:''' Oh, oh no. [[Sonichu 10#Forgiveness...?|You said that me and Mao and Sean and Evan killed Simonla]]. That's what your comic says. Apparently you didn't fulfill that part of the requirement either. Because I wanted you to kill her, but you accused me of killing her. And then you killed us in your comic. What kind of apology is that? When... Okay, an apology is when you do something wrong, you acknowledge it, and you make reparations to whoever was wronged. An apology is not where, um, you attack the person that you owe an apology to.

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Alec:''' It's like you said... It's like you handed me a bowl of ice cream, said, "Hey, here's some ice cream for you," but then just as I reached out for it, you threw it on the ground. That's kind of what it feels like. Chris, do you remember last time, I told you that you were the one who drew the Voltorb? You were the one who killed Simonla.

'''Chris:''' Hm. Yeah, well, requesting the death of one of my characters comes with a price.

'''Alec:''' I'm sorry, what was that?

'''Chris:''' And, and I had... I said request of the, request of the killing of one of my characters...

'''Alec:''' NOT YOUR CHARACTER. Not, no, Simonla was not your character. She was Evan's.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, but anyway, with all the writing, with all the writing...

'''Alec:''' "Yeah, but anyway"?

'''Chris:''' With all the, uh...

'''Alec:''' You said, "Yeah, but anyway." Are you acknowledging that Simonla was not yours?

'''Chris:''' [''pause''] I acknowledge that Simonla was not mine, but I did not...

'''Alec:''' You just, but, two minutes ago you said...

'''Chris:''' I did not care very much for all the anger and torments and that such abuse that I continued to get from Evan. Anger...

'''Alec:''' What, what abuse did you get from him?

'''Chris:''' Verbal, verbal abuse and...

'''Alec:''' Like how?

'''Chris:''' In the Mailbag.

'''Alec:''' He sent you e-mails requesting you to stop using the character that was his.

'''Chris:''' And then threatening me with, sic his lawyers on me...

'''Alec:''' Yeah. Because you were committing illegal acts against him.

'''Chris:''' Anyway, the point is, Simonla is dead now.

'''Alec:''' Yeah, well, no, the point is that, um, you apparently don't listen when I talk to you. That's my point. Right?

'''Chris:''' Hm. Actually...

'''Alec:''' Because you believe that you are in the right, and everyone else is in the wrong. And you... Is that your TV going in the background? Do you ever turn your TV off when you talk to people on the phone? That might be kinda...

'''Chris:''' I do turn my... Well, actually, I do turn the TV off sometimes. [''takes a self-righteous tone''] Alright, I'll turn it off now.

'''Alec:''' Well, thank you, I appreciate that. Okay.

'''Chris:''' Okay.

'''Alec:''' Alright. Thank you for that. Um, who is is [[Sandy]], by the way? Sandy, like Simonla's daughter?

'''Chris:''' Wild and Simonla's daughter. Yes.

'''Alec:''' How can Simonla have a daughter when she's not supposed to exist in your comic? You know, Evan might get pissed about Sandy existing.

'''Chris:''' Well, the, well, still, Sandy did not originate from Simonchu.

'''Alec:''' She kinda looks like, exactly like Simonla, but with, like, Lisa Simpson hair. She did originate from, she's like a clone of Simonla.

'''Chris:''' Well, she is not a clone of Simonla, she is a Ground-type rosechu.

'''Alec:''' Yeah. Isn't that what Simonla was? Do you even realize the point of getting rid of Simonla in the first place? It was because... Okay. Evan was mad about Simonla because Simonla was just a rip-off of Simonchu. And it looks like Sandy is a rip-off of Simonla, which by corollary makes her a rip-off of Simonchu as well.

'''Chris:''' [''long pause''] I disagree with that.

'''Alec:''' You can disagree all you want. Doesn't make it true. You can tell me the sky is orange as much as you want, it doesn't change the fact that the sky is blue. I mean, judges will agree with that one.

'''Chris:''' Okay, well, actually, still, Sandy does have an origin that's definitely not, definitely not one that Simonla was from. Explained lately, it's based off of somebody's, some other character.

'''Alec:''' She originates from Simonla.

'''Chris:''' She actually, she actually was born as a rosey...

'''Alec:''' From Simonla.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh, long pause'']

'''Alec:''' You know, this probably doesn't matter a whole lot, I bet you're never going to use Sandy again. I mean...

'''Chris:''' Oh yes I will! Because, because we need a constructor, we need, we need the main constructor in the city of CWCville, and Simonla was that, so now Sandy has to be the one who fills in Simonla's shoes.

'''Alec:''' Can't you just have, like, a construction crew? Like, you know, construction workers with vehicles? How can one person really do all the construction?

'''Chris:''' Simonla, Simonla was head builder, she did have a crew. And when you take out the leader the whole crew falls.

'''Alec:''' Okay, don't you think that crew... You know, I'm sure she had, like, a second-in-command, alright. Don't you think that her crew might feel kind of insulted that, um, you have, like, a person who is a week old just take control? Inheriting the crew. So you, you've got a construction crew that runs, like...

'''Chris:''' No, she was, she's not, well, she's not, Sandy's not going to take the reins prematurely like that...

'''Alec:''' You just said that...

'''Chris:''' She's going through heavy training.

'''Alec:''' Why? So she's child labor?

'''Chris:''' No, not child labor.

'''Alec:''' Well, she's like a week old, and you already had her assassinate people. I mean, that's...

'''Chris:''' The point of that was that they were revenged against Evan for having, for even thinking of killing off Simonla.

'''Alec:''' But you killed Simonla.

'''Chris:''' Because I was forced, because I felt forced to by, between, by y'all.

'''Alec:''' That's correct, we did force you to, because your refused to acknowledge that... Chris, what is copyright infringement? Give me your definition.

'''Chris:''' [''pause''] Copyright infringement...

'''Alec:''' Yes. I'd like to hear your definition.

'''Chris:''' [''another pause''] The misuse...of a character that originally belonged to somebody else.

'''Alec:''' Oh! Really.

'''Chris:''' Without their consent.

'''Alec:''' Okay, now, how does that connect to Simonla? You misused, you misused Simonla because she rightfully belonged to someone else.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, still, even still, even Sonichu was originally mine, and I have a copy-, I have the copyright registration forms to prove that.

'''Alec:''' So? What does that have to do with Simonla? You stole... Don't change the subject, Chris. You stole Simonchu and screwed around with him. Two wrongs make a right, is that, is that the case?

'''Chris:''' That is not the point I am trying to make.

'''Alec:''' Well, then, why do you...

'''Chris:''' That is fairly, that is fairly accurate though.

'''Alec:''' When we're talking about Simonla, why do you bring up Sonichu's copyright? What does that have to do with it?

'''Chris:''' Because you drew him, because you drew him in your pages without my consent, and then, and then made him look like, look like a homosexual. Or appear as such.

'''Alec:''' Why does what I... Why does anything that I do have anything at all to do with how you treat Evan and his property? Why do you want to punish one person for, for a wrong that you perceive another unrelated person doing?

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' I am not Evan. Evan is not me. Chris, do you... Okay, this... Goddammit, Chris, this is just like, remember when you were complaining about how, you know, the trolls and ED attack you, and you used that as an excuse for why you treat me like shit? Why do you think it's okay to treat some random person like shit just because you've been treated badly, by other people that aren't related?

'''Chris:''' Okay, well, now, to correct you, it is not, I did not do it on a random person, quote unquote, I actually had reasons to do it against you and your crew.

'''Alec:''' I asked you why you stole something from Evan, which happened a long time ago, as I understand it, actually, well before I created Asperchu, and your response is that, you know, it's because of something I draw.

'''Chris:''' Well, I'm just saying, that was...

'''Alec:''' If I remember right...

'''Chris:''' ...why I did, why I didn't care for what you did very much, and that was what you did there.

'''Alec:''' Chris, when someone asks you a question, it's polite to respond with an answer that is relevant to the question. When I asked you why you think it's okay to steal Simonchu from Evan, please don't respond by going off on some unrelated tangent about how you don't like me.

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' Okay? Now, if I remember right, on that Simonchu article, before you doctored it to make it look different, it said that it was like in August of 2008 that you, quote unquote, created Simonla. That's a long time, that's over a year before I created Asperchu. I created Asperchu not even three months ago.

'''Chris:''' Mm-kay. Hm.

'''Alec:''' Okay? Okay what?

'''Chris:''' Well, let me think about that a moment so I can properly answer the question about the, uh... The quote unquote character theft.

'''Alec:''' You know what, I don't really want to go over whether you think stealing Simonchu is right or wrong or not, because we've done that before, and you, you know, I was fooled, I thought that I had gotten some kind of response out of you, which turned out to be a complete lie. Because you, to this day, still believe that Simonla is yours and everyone else is evil. I just want to know why, why you think that you're perfect, and that everyone else who has a disagreement with you is automatically wrong.

'''Chris:''' Well, to correct you, I never thought that I was perfect! I am imperfect, for a few reasons...

'''Alec:''' You still think that you're better than everyone else.

'''Chris:''' And one of which is definitely the high-functioning autism.

'''Alec:''' Well, what, what the hell does autism have to do with you being a bad person?

'''Chris:''' No, I was just saying, that's one reason why I'm not perfect.

'''Alec:''' So if not for autism, you think you would be perfect? Do you really think autism is your only flaw? I don't think...

'''Chris:''' No, I have a lot of other flaws, I know that.

'''Alec:''' Yeah, I don't think autism... Of all of your flaws, I don't think autism...

'''Chris:''' But I'm just saying, I'm just saying that's, I'm just saying that is one of my flaws that makes me not perfect. I am not perfect, I never said that. I have never said that I was perfect.

'''Alec:''' You imply it by suggesting that Evan and I are evil people who, who made you kill Simonla, because she was yours! Gah, okay, now I'm really pissed off, Chris. I'm mad at you. Because, why... How many years have you been pissing and moaning at people about your copyrights, your precious Sonichu copyrights? But you don't give a shit about Evan's copyright, or my copyright, or anyone else. You just take whatever you want, and you act like you're in the right by doing so. Why do you do that?

'''Chris:''' Hm. [''mumbles''] Why do I do that... [''long pause''] Hm. Mm. Hm.

'''Alec:''' You have no response, do you?

'''Chris:''' I'm thinking! Can I think? Sometimes my mind's a little slow.

'''Alec:''' You've had, like, how many years of worrying about copyright?

'''Chris:''' [''heavy sigh'']

'''Alec:''' I would think you would be a master of copyright law by now, considering how important it is to you. I would think you would know copyright laws backward and forward.

'''Chris:''' I am not as knowledgeable as a copyright lawyer.

'''Alec:''' Chris, um... Let's change the subject a little bit. What's up with that, your Christian Love Day video?

'''Chris:''' Because, because it was my birthday, I was just making a stand against the trolls. And the internet bullies.

'''Alec:''' What stand?

'''Chris:''' That I'm not gonna be let-, that I'm not going to be thrust down by the likes of which... And I'm going to continue on.

'''Alec:''' You... You kinda just... I recognized that speech you used, you just took that from ''Independence Day''.

'''Chris:''' What?

'''Alec:''' You took that speech from...

'''Chris:''' I did not take...

'''Alec:''' Chris, that speech, that "We will not go down without a fight" speech, that was... That was lifted directly from, uh, ''Independence Day''. Remember that movie?

'''Chris:''' Well... I remember that movie, I saw it only once, and I did not know that those, that those lines came from that, that speech was actually written by a friend of mine.

'''Alec:''' So you can't even write your own speech?

'''Chris:''' I can write my own speech! But he, I let my friend do it for me.

'''Alec:''' Well, why do you think that your birthday should be a holiday in the first place?

'''Chris:''' Well, it, well, once, when it is a, it is a holiday in Mexico. They should be equally important holidays in America.

'''Alec:''' It's, okay, it's Mexican Flag Day. In Mexico. Mexico has, I dunno, what, like 40 million citizens, something like that? So, are you really saying that Mexican Flag Day is no more important than your birthday? Should 40 million Americans, or more, be celebrating your birthday?

'''Chris:''' I'm not saying, I am not saying that.

'''Alec:''' You said that your birthday should be of equal importance to Mexican Flag Day.

'''Chris:''' I'm just saying...

'''Alec:''' Well, I was wrong, I just, I just looked it up, Mexico is actually like 110 million people. I was way off. Okay, so, your birthday is more important than 110 million Mexicans.

'''Chris:''' I never said that. And I never said that anybody should celebrate my birthday on that day.

'''Alec:''' Chris, um, your first response when I asked you, like 90 seconds ago, I asked you, "Why should your birthday be a holiday?" And you said, "Well, it's a holiday in Mexico, therefore it should be of equal importance in America." That is exactly what you said.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Alec:''' And it's what you're thinking. You think that, you think that Mexican Flag day is just, not even good enough, right?

'''Chris:''' Well, it can be better.

'''Alec:''' It can be better?! It's a day for 110 million Mexicans to celebrate the freedom of their country!

'''Chris:''' And that, and that celebration could be, celeb-, could be accepted in America.

'''Alec:''' Well, why? Why would Americans celebrate Mexico's history? Americans have the fourth of July, that's when we celebrate our history. We have Flag Day too, like June 16 I think?

'''Chris:''' That's about, uh, I think that's about right.

'''Alec:''' Yeah. So we already have a Flag Day.

'''Chris:''' But still, I mean, we have these, we have the, the Messicans in America.

'''Alec:''' And I'm sure they can celebrate Flag Day.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. So, we should accept that and, and maybe celebrate as well in like a congratulatory way for them.

'''Alec:''' Well, then why wasn't your video, um, about Mexican Flag Day, instead of this made-up Christian Love Day?

'''Chris:''' My idea behind Christian Love Day is, like, the possibility of a second Valentine's Day.

'''Alec:''' It's like 10 days after the real Valentine's Day. Why would we need another Valentine's so soon?

'''Chris:''' [''sigh''] It's like we need more, it's like we need more reminders to love and care about each other.

'''Alec:''' Valentine's Day is a Hallmark holiday, sponsored by corporations to sell shitty gift cards and disgusting fake sugar candies. It's not about love. It's just a stupid corporate holiday. If you want, if you want to really celebrate love, you can do it at any time. You don't need a holiday.

'''Chris:''' It's to help us, help remind us to do so constant-, on a more constant basis.

'''Alec:''' Okay, so why your birthday? Why your birthday, of all the days in the year, why would you choose your birthday for this particular holiday? Unless it was about celebrating yourself.

'''Chris:''' Because it feels right.

'''Alec:''' What do you mean, "it feels right"?

'''Chris:''' It feels like a good dr-, a good day to celebrate something.

'''Alec:'''Yeah. Like Mexican Flag Day.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Alec:''' Chris, Chris, just admit that you just want... You really think that you're so important, that you're so saintly and perfect, that you think your birthday should be a holiday. Just admit that to me.

'''Chris:''' Well, I am not saintly or perfect.

'''Alec:''' But you think that you're such an important person that your birthday should be a holiday. Admit it. It's about your ego.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh''] Hm. I partially agree with you on that, but it's actually a lot more than just quote unquote ego.

'''Alec:''' What, what more could it be?

'''Chris:''' I am not sure right now because I cannot come up with the right, with the right ans-, with appropriate answer for that.

'''Alec:''' Well then, well then you shouldn't be trying to create a holiday... Chris, you shouldn't really be trying to do anything until after you've come up with a logical reason to do it.

'''Chris:''' Okay, well, I, okay well...

'''Alec:''' Countless times, countless times I've asked you why you do things, and you fall back on, "I'm not sure, it felt right." Or you use your emotions as an excuse, like when you brutally murdered me and Evan and Mao and Sean in your, in your sham mock trial. You know, [''mocking voice''] "because you were still angry about the ads!" Let's go back to that...

'''Chris:''' And another thing...

'''Alec:''' What, what other thing?

'''Chris:''' What, how you portray me and my, and my electric hedgehogs, even in a parodic way, as a, as a, as definitely mentally retarded for one characteristic.

'''Alec:''' [''talking over Chris''] Chris, how many times have you...

'''Chris:''' And then brutally killing, killing us off like you did...

'''Alec:''' You brutally killed me.

'''Chris:''' And then, and selling, and sexually expliciting us like that.

'''Alec:''' Sexually ex-

'''Chris:''' Where you said all that first.

'''Alec:''' Oh, so that makes it okay for you to do anything? Chris, how many times... Okay, okay, you accuse me of making a parody, and I can't even begin to count the number of times I told you Asperchu's not a parody, but you accuse me of making a parody like it's such an evil thing, um, how many times have you fallen back on describing Sonichu as a parody of Sonic and Pikachu, when people ask you? And when you do it, it's a good thing, you use it as a defense against attacks by Nintendo and Sega and other companies. Why is it, when you think someone else is parodying you, um, shit hits the fan? Why is that, Chris?

'''Chris:''' Well, for one thing, you have por-, you definitely have portrayed a sense of retardedness and stupidity and even worse in that sense. And then used, that came from me and my pages, and the videos, and put them in your book. Like, you definitely drew a dildo and a sports bra as among one of the things, as among two things that Asperchu was digging out of his chest in the first book.

'''Alec:''' Have you ever seen ''Team America''? You remember that movie?

'''Chris:''' Yep. Yeah, I've seen that movie.

'''Alec:''' Did you like it?

'''Chris:''' It was okay.

'''Alec:''' You remember how they made Matt Damon retarded in that movie?

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' Well, they did.

'''Chris:''' Some of, some of those jokes do not hit me right away because they're not that, they're not that obvious to me. Or I don't know what's about the context of it. Like for example, the recent new ''Family Guy'' where Chris dates the Down's Syndrome girl, and then apparently the joke where she says "I'm the daughter of a former Alaskan...something."

'''Alec:''' Governor. It was Sarah Palin, Chris. It was about her.

'''Chris:''' Former Alaskan Senator, that was it.

'''Alec: ''' No, it was the governor.

'''Chris:''' But yeah, it was supposed to be, it was, I learned in an article in today's ''Washington Post'' that, uh, that apparently it was meant as an attack on Sarah Parin, and I did not know that when I first heard that.

'''Alec:''' Sarah P-A-L-I-N, actually.

'''Chris:''' But I was, at least I was, that was a general statement.

'''Alec:''' Okay, um, we're getting off on a wild tangent here. My question is, why is parody such a bad thing to you? When other people do it.

'''Chris:''' Uh, I do not understand half the question. Why is parody blind to me...?

'''Alec:''' Why do you think parody is bad when other people do it?

'''Chris:''' Oh.

'''Alec:''' I mean, it sounds, it kinda sounds like, if I had drawn you as a perfect, you know, super-strong master of the universe like you draw yourself in your comic, then you would have been fine with it, because I would have been kissing your ass in that case.

'''Chris:''' That would have been, that would have been considered, that would be considerably agreeable right there between us, yeah.

'''Alec:''' So you prefer that people just kiss your ass all the time?

'''Chris:''' It may, it may, it helps, it makes me feel better, it makes me feel encouraged.

'''Alec:''' It makes you feel better?! Chris, you're an adult, you really want people to kiss your ass all the time?

'''Chris:''' Well, yeah, not all the time.

'''Alec:''' Why can't you learn to deal with...

'''Chris:''' I don't want, I don't like, I don't like, I don't like constant abuse.

'''Alec:''' What constant abuse?

'''Chris:''' And torment and slanders and cursings.

'''Alec:''' Oh, what torment and slander and cursing? Hey, Chris, okay, okay, you don't like slander? What about all the lies you've told about me? What about, okay, remember a while ago you made a video trying to hypnotize people into hating Asperchu? Like you spoke in backwards Spanish or something? Remember when you cursed me with the death threats?

'''Chris:''' And I apologized for that.

'''Alec:''' No, no, no, no, not, no, you're not getting away with that bullshit excuse this time, Chris. Okay? You can't just do things, do horrible things, and then offer a fake apology afterwards. That's not okay. That's not what apology is. You know, you claim to be a Christian, this is really, do you really think this is what God wants his children to do?

'''Chris:''' Hm. You're right, it is not something that, uh, God would like.

'''Alec:''' Yeah, well, you're not a Christian.

'''Chris:''' [''shifts to a grim, offended tone''] I am a Christian. I am a baptized practicing Methodist...

'''Alec:''' No, no you're not. You don't practice... Baptism doesn't mean shit. You don't even try to practice what Christianity teaches.

'''Chris:''' Well, for one thing, I don't have a total understanding of all the rules, and, uh...

'''Alec:''' Well, you can't be a very good Christian if you don't understand the rules.

'''Chris:''' Of course, there's a whole lots of, to memorize, and, and it's...

'''Alec:''' [''mockingly''] Yeah, religion is hard, isn't it?

'''Chris:''' ...and, what is, God does want, one of the things God wants us to do is not to worry about every single detail.

'''Alec:''' But you worry about every single... Oh, no, no, okay, no, that's not how it works. God wants you to follow the rules that he lays down. God wants you to try to be a good person. You don't even try to be a good person. You are completely selfish, and you do whatever you want, and you demand that other people go out of your way for you, to do things as you want them to. And then when someone starts pestering you, you offer a superficial apology and hope that smooths it all over. And then you draw a comic, you know, negating even that simple apology, where you threaten people and murder them in your comic. Thereby proving that you were just lying to the person who, you know, thought that you actually understood the point he was trying to get across. God condemns lying, you know.

'''Chris:''' [''angry sigh'']

'''Alec:''' Admit that you lied to me when you said, when you agreed with me that you didn't have a right to use Simonla. Admit that you have always believed that Simonla is yours.

 '''Chris:''' [''long pause''] I'll admit...that.

'''Alec:''' Oh, okay. Okay, good, so all of our previous calls were just lies, then.

'''Chris:''' Not, no, not, no, they actually happened.

'''Alec:''' Yes, they happened, Chris, but your responses were lies. I know the phone calls happened in reality.

'''Chris:''' Hm. Anyway, uh, let me get back, anyway, uh, I don't mean to be all, but I want to get back to an early, to the earlier topic about, uh, what's wrong with you making a parody of a parody. Okay, well, okay, well, take a cue from what they did in one episode of ''Robot Chicken''.

'''Alec:''' I don't watch ''Robot Chicken'', so this reference means nothing to me.

'''Chris:''' Hm. Well, anyway, anyway, anyway, one...

'''Alec:''' Try explaining it to me without the use of TV references.

'''Chris:''' [''angry''] Consider a remake of a remake of an original movie! That was original as a blockbuster.

'''Alec:''' Okay... What about it? What about a remake of a remake?

'''Chris:''' It's not very good.

'''Alec:''' Sometimes they are. Sometimes remakes are better. Did you see the new ''Dawn of the Dead''? That was way better than the George Romero shit.

'''Chris:''' I have not, I have not seen either, I have not seen either ''Dawn of the Dead''.

'''Alec:''' You probably shouldn't, 'cause there's gore in it, and I know how much you hate that.

'''Chris:''' I don't mind, I don't mind gore, up to a certain point.

'''Alec:''' Well, obviously, given how gory your murder of me was. But, okay, I'm still having a little trouble understanding why, um, parody is okay when you do it, but not okay when someone else does it.

'''Chris:''' [''long pause''] Hm.

'''Alec:''' Because you proudly proclaim Sonichu to be a parody, but at the same time you accuse other people of doing parodies like they're doing a bad thing.

'''Chris:''' [''more stalling''] Hm. Okay, well, think about this. How about if somebody did a parody to Asperchu?

'''Alec:''' Yeah?

'''Chris:''' And made him look even more stupid and more retarded, and actually brutally killed him in all the blood and gory detail! Or had him sexually raped in a prison cell of all dudes! How would you feel if you saw that?

'''Alec:''' Uh, I don't think I'd give a shit, honestly. I mean, if it was well-done, I might kinda laugh at it. If it was meant to be a funny parody. See, I don't take myself completely, I don't take myself completely seriously like you do. I can laugh at my own foibles and I can laugh at the foibles of my comic. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

'''Chris:''' [''pause''] That is...a theory, yes. Though I am not one hundred per-, I'll, that is, a, a previous...

'''Alec:''' So you don't really agree with it, though? You don't think imitation is ever a good thing?

'''Chris:''' Not one hundred percent.

'''Alec:''' Because Sonichu's an imitation of Sonic. Then you must agree that Sonichu is a good thing.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, because it was, because it was originally meant in a positive light. But then I get all the inputs from the trolls and all that on the internets, and then that just plain ticks me off.

'''Alec:''' Okay, if the guy who created Sonic, I don't know what his name is, but if he came along and discovered your Sonichu comic, he would probably-

'''Chris:''' [''rudely burps'']

'''Alec:''' -See that at least half of it is just you attacking trolls... I mean, the comic's not even really about Sonichu. It's about you, and it's about your war against trolls.

'''Chris:''' Well, that's to be undone because, because I, because I have just, after I finish with book number 10 I will be making less appearances in the book, in the books, and then, and now it will be more about Sonichu.

'''Alec:''' Are you gonna do that reboot that we talked about?

'''Chris:''' There will be a form of a reboot, yes.

'''Alec:''' Why did you do these pages, then, if you're gonna do a reboot?

'''Chris:''' I mean, I mean, if I'm gonna be making less appearances in the comics, I figure I may as well let myself go out with a bang.

'''Alec:''' Um, no, no, Chris, Chris, I explained to you, a reboot is a complete restart. What happens in the reboot will have nothing to do with the comics that you've made thus far. And you know, you said you had like 30 pages, you only uploaded like...16.

'''Chris:''' That was the amount I had to complete number, book number 10. And the book is completed.

'''Alec:''' You said you had like 30 pages.

'''Chris:''' Well, right now I just wanted to get book number 10 out of the way.

'''Alec:''' But you said you were going to have like 30 pages up on your birthday.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh'']

'''Alec:''' So you went back on your word again.

'''Chris:''' [''angry''] Well, I overestimated myself!

'''Alec:''' What do you mean, "overestimated"? You said you had like 30 drawn and ready to be Photoshopped.

'''Chris:''' Well, just accept the fact that I had, I finished book number 10, and I had them all ready for Photoshop, and I uploaded them.

'''Alec:''' You know, if you have a deadline with a publisher and they're expecting 30 pages by a certain date, and you come to them and say, "Oh, yeah, here's 16 pages," they're not gonna be happy with you.

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' And you didn't even upload them on your birthday, you uploaded them today. The day after. People who miss deadlines don't get paid.

'''Chris:''' Well, I had computer troubles.

'''Alec:''' Of course you had...

'''Chris:''' And I had to go out, and I had to go with my family to a restaurant to celebrate my birthday.

'''Alec:''' Sonichu is your job, Chris!

'''Chris:''' [''sigh''] That's another thing, you put them in the perspective of like, he's my job, it just makes me feel...

'''Alec:''' Well, you intend to make your huge money-making franchise, right? So yes, he is your job.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Alec:''' Yeah! And you don't take your job seriously!

'''Chris:''' [''sigh''] But, but you see, with that belief, with that definition, in the mentality of an artist, when the thing was originally supposed to be a work of art and creativity, then it just cheapens it.

'''Alec:''' Um, well, then, I could say it cheapened it when you started saying you intended to publish it and make money off of it.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh'']

'''Alec:''' So what you're telling me now is, you have no intention of ever making money off Sonichu. Because if it is just a work of art for its own sake, that's fine. But you keep promising, you know, deadlines that you miss, and you keep saying you're gonna publish it and make money off of it.

'''Chris:''' [''massive sigh'']

'''Alec:''' Do you not want to make money off Sonichu anymore?

'''Chris:''' No, I would like to make money off of Sonichu.

'''Alec:''' Well, okay. You're cheapening it, then, it's not a work of art anymore.

'''Chris:''' Because I had too many influx from bad people like the trolls!

'''Alec:''' What the hell do trolls have to do with it, Chris?

'''Chris:''' And also from, and also from...

 '''Alec:'''I have you as a troll, and my comic kept going just fine.

 '''Chris:''' And also from...

'''Alec:''' And how do trolls control what goes in the comic? Go ahead.

'''Chris:''' [''heavy sigh''] It's when they really tick me off, and then it just, it just, it's like putting, [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|it's like putting poison into the water supply]].

'''Alec:''' Why do you keep responding to trolls, then?

'''Chris:''' [''mega-sigh'']

'''Alec:''' And another thing, you have a really broad definition of "trolls," it seems. Because you think that people that ask you questions you don't like in your Mailbag are trolls. You think homosexual people are trolls just for existing, because you want to cure gays.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh'']

'''Alec:''' I think the ironic thing there is, gays would probably consider you a troll. Because you want to destroy their identity when they haven't done anything to you.

'''Chris:''' [''another sigh'']

'''Alec:''' You think I'm a troll, and I've been trying to help you.

'''Chris:''' Well, I'm sorry, sometimes things are, I have been trying to collaborate, I get misunderstood often, and it just really makes me feel like, I don't know, I feel like I'm being misunder-

[''Call cuts off'']

{{succession|label=[[Alec Benson Leary calls]]|prevlink=[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|Chris and Alec Call 8]]|nextlink=[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|Current]]|}}

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?gzmndqjwz1x The original audio]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Ae7T05cIJQ YouTube Version: Part 1]
[[Category:Phone calls]]

User:Anonymax

2010-04-28T15:23:56Z

Wozblod: oh hai

<div style="clear:right; float:right; width:358px;">
{{Britfag}}{{White}}{{Agnostic}}{{Straight|male}}
</div>
==Oh hai==
I'm Anonymax and I am a serial wiki editor. Chris never ceases to amaze me every time I revisit him to see what's new. I sometimes have to hold off visiting CWCiki just because I am not sure I'll be able to get my head around whatever random crap he's done next.

IRL I'm a university student in the UK, studying computer forensics. I'm a convicted WoWfag and lurk in large doses far into the night.

Ask me about Linux and how I can help make it work for you!

Rosechu (species)

2010-04-21T01:48:50Z

Wozblod: tried to fix typos, i am high as fuck

[[Image:240-TanfulRchu.jpg|thumb|A '''rosechu'''.]]

'''Rosechu''' is the name used for the female gendered specimen of [[Chris]]'s imaginary species of [[electric hedgehog]] [[pokémon]]. When generally referring to all creatures in this species, or referring to male specimen of this species, the term [[Sonichu (species)|sonichu]] is commonly used.

==Rosechus and reproduction==
Chris has loosely based the anatomy of both [[Sonichu (species)|sonichu]] and rosechu reproductive organs on those of the human, and those of the dog. A rosechu's vagina or "[[china]]" is normally hidden from view by a flap of skin, which recedes during urination, sexual arousal, or a "psych-up" attack. Rosechu nipples appear only when aroused, "for sensual massage" (this implies that a rosechu must be sexually aroused to feed her own young). Rosechus possess a "V-shaped pouch" behind their vaginal opening, which apparently serves the same function as a human uterus.

Sex may be painful for rosechus the first time, even causing them to bleed from their hymen, but it soon begins to feel like "a sensual massage." If impregnated, the resulting zygote is gestated within the mother rosechu for "a few months", after which the rosechu deposits a egg outside of her body, and must keep it warm until the infant [[sonee]] or rosey hatches. This reveals all rosechus as being monotremes. Their biology is inconsistent, however, as [[Rosechu (character)|Rosechu]] is depicted menstruating in ''[[Sonichu 10]]'', a function found only in some species of placental mammals. This may be down to a unique quirk in the reproductive system of rosechus, though it is more likely that the author just [[slow in the minds|doesn't know what he's talking about]].

Chris has mentioned that a sonee is born as the result of intercourse between a sonichu and a rosechu, or some combination of the above and a ditto. It is never explained how a rosechu and a ditto would copulate.

The gestation time of a Rosechu pregnancy is unknown; however, [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and Rosechu's two eldest offspring — Cerah and Christine — were born on June 29 and October 6, 2006, respectively. Robbie, the couple's third hypothetical child, was born on February 26, 2007. Given that there are 99 days between the first two dates, and 143 between the latter two, any of several things can be hypothesized: 1) the gestation time of a Sonichu is about three months, and Sonichu and Rosechu wasted no time getting back on the saddle after their first child; 2) the gestation time is closer to four months, and Christine was a premature birth; or 3) Chris paid no mind to the idea of time when selecting birthdates for his characters, and never noticed the logical impossibility of the Sonees' birthdates because he is an idiot. All things considered, the third option seems the most plausible.

==Rosechus and evolution==
[[File:EvolutionChart.png|thumb|You would be forgiven for finding this confusing.]]
Chris seems to hold a rather strange view on evolution. It is largely based on Pokémon. When hatched from their eggs, rosechus are born as a rosey. This infant pokémon can already have a certain sub-type; [[Angelica]], for instance, was born as a white rosey with a sky subtype. After being nurtured for some time, the rosey then tends to evolve into their rosechu-form. The path of evolution beyond rosechu is unclear, although, when the rosechu is brought in contact with a moonstone, the creature can evolve into a [[vamprosa]].

When Chris finally created a [[CWCipedia]] article for Rosechu, he included an extensive (and confusing) evolutionary path for rosechus as a species. Curiously, while most of the rosechus shown in the comic have some kind of subtype from birth, Chris's ramblings imply that all roseys start without a type, and only acquire one through external sources (such as being exposed to a moonstone or the other bullshit that can force a pokemon to evolve from the ''Pokémon'' franchise). He also retcons the evolution into vamprosa to say that one merely get a rosechu to highest level friendship and then level up between midnight and 12:05 am.

The final evolution for rosechu is The Incredible Lioness, better known as the PMS Monster from ''[[Sonichu 8]]'' that face-raped [[Jason Kendrick Howell]]. Seemingly analogous to [[Ultra Sonichu]], rather than gaining power from exposure to [[Sonichu Balls|Chaotic Crystals]], Rosechu simply gains tremendous strength through [[stress]], closer to the Incredible Hulk than anything else. Because she's a [[women's rights|woman]] she can't control herself when she gets into a rage, and the only way to calm her is to tell her that she's pretty, or whatever bullshit Chris means by "make amends with deepest apologies, heavy flattery, and promising to do as she wishes". The process also completely destroys her clothes, and she has to have the foresight to know she's about to go into a blind, unstoppable rage and remove the clothing, or just put on some makeshift clothes later to compensate. The fact that she ''needs'' clothes is a bit of an odd point, since several of the Rosechus never wear more than shoes, so a lack of clothing hardly seems to be an issue for the species. Chris also clarifies that only the TRUE and ORIGINAL Rosechu can transform, meaning if [[Bubbles]] gets really pissed at someone she's just shit out of luck.

==List of known rosechus==
[[File:ProportionFail.jpg|thumb|right|Rosechus are, on average, shorter than their Sonichu counterparts]]
* [[Rosechu]]
* [[Angelica]]
* [[Bubbles]]
* [[Lolisa]]
* [[Simonla]]
* [[Zapina]]
* [[Zelina Rosechu]]
* [[Chloe Rosechu]]
* [[Sarah Hammer#Saramah Rosechu|Saramah]]
* [[Crystalina Rosechu]]
* [[Ivy]] (becomes a rosechu in [[Sonichu Special 3]])
* [[Silvana]] (can transform into a [[Sonichu (species)|sonichu]])
* [[Sandy Rosechu]] (most likely originally Simonla, but was made to replace her)

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Sonichu]]

Stress

2010-03-20T16:43:49Z

Wozblod: Added the cwcki

[[Image:Stress.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in stressed mode.]]

{{quote|Stress hinders the emotions and physical abiltites as swiftly as a bullet.|Chris on stress<ref name="IRC" />}}

'''Stress''' is the bane of [[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s existence.

When pressed on his 'high-functioning' autism and eventually learning that he cannot get away with blaming everything on said [[autism]], Chris discovered that "stress" works just as well. However, it's assumed that Chris could be confusing 'stress' with 'depression', refusing to admit that he is in fact, unhappy with his current situation, as well as the fact that Chris has never experienced actual stress in his life apart from his consistent paranoia over getting trolled.

When under the effects of stress, Chris will typically post videos without his glasses and talk in a more meek variation of his usual monotone speaking voice. It is during these periods of feeling stressed that Chris will opt to remove himself from the internet for about a week or so, and then come back feeling refreshed, rejuvenated and given a new resolve to finish the [[Love Quest|love quest]], usually accompanied by his latest [[Troll|sweet heart]]. This is most likely due to his autistic regenerative abilities that make sure that his heart never goes below 0% and into the negatives.

==Things that give Christian stress==

* [[Cwcki]].
* Bullies.<ref name="IRC" />
* [[Trolls]].
* People at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]]</ref>
* "[A] father who starts more arguements than there are flies at a garbage dump".<ref name="IRC">[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref>
* A [[Bob|father]] who doesn't wash his hands.<ref name="IRC20081231" />
* [[Pickles]].
* [[Wendy's|Getting a job]].
* Anything requiring him to leave the house.
* Doing any chores in the [[house]].<ref name="IRC" />
* The existence of [[ED|webpages]] outlining his many [[fail|failures]].
* [[Boyfriend-free girl|Asking girls to go out with him]].
* [[Autistic|His "mental block" of autism]].
* [[Chris and his Ego|Talking to anyone about anything except himself]].
* Being told things he doesn't like to hear.
* Having drawings of him finger-banging [[Megan]] confused with [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]].
* [[Jimmy Hill|Copyright Issues]].
* [[Homo|His daily struggle against becoming homosexual]].
* Being accused of homosexuality.
* [[Gay4Sonichu|His characters being accused of homosexuality]].
* [[Blanca|Finding out his internet girlfriend broke up with him because of the Pickle Man]].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate October 21st, 2008]]</ref>
* [[PandaHalo|Finding out his internet girlfriend died in a brushfire]].
* [[Sarah Jackson|Finding out his internet girlfriend was killed by Optimus Prime in a tragic car accident]].
* [[Julie|Finding out his internet girlfriend is a 13 year old boy]].
* [[Ivy|Finding out his internet girlfriend doesn't exist]].
* [[Kacey|Finding out his internet girlfriend is marrying someone else]].
* People [[Chris and death|dying]].<ref name="IRC" />
* Finding out that [[Emily|his date]] was a mole working for The [[Man in the Pickle Suit]].
* Being famous.<ref name="IRC20081231">[[IRC (31 December 2008)]]</ref>
* Being [[Asperchu|parodied]].
* Being [[Chris and his ego|criticized]] or [[White knight|corrected]].
* Being [[friend zone]]d.
* Having his identity [[CChanSonichuCWC|questioned]].
* [[Megan|His hormones]].<ref>[[Megan E-mails#Chris continues bothering her about ED|Megan E-mails]]</ref>
* Anything slightly inconvenient.
* Anything that Autism isn't an excuse for.

==Things that relieve Chris's stress==

* [[Mass debating]].<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs#I am perverted]]</ref>
* Having a sweetheart resetting his [[biological clock]].
* The prospect of having a "sex time."

==Things Christian does whilst stressed==

* [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|Shits himself]].
* Cries.
* Becomes less/more productive than usual.
* Rages about his "pitiful adult life" in YouTube videos.
* Rages at his [[Mailbag|mailers]].
* Sends [[death threats]].
* Abuses his [[PSEye|cameras]].
* Crashes Into Slumber.
* Becomes increasingly homophobic.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref>
* [[Stress sigh|Sighs excessively]].
* Suffers from [[Sports bra|memory loss]].
* Draws hideous hardcore pornography of his friends and furry avatars.<ref>[[Mailbag 42]]</ref>

==Sauces==
<references />

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Talk:CWC Cums for a Cat

2010-01-15T18:41:59Z

Wozblod:

bluespike was on skype, not actually talking with chris, just typing out shit

this happened right after mumble 7 i believe, after i (meaning clyde) told chris that panda was dead

and then bob walks in plan was thought up of.

then the rest...was history. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 20:48, 22 December 2009 (CET)

Link is dead. Can someone re-up? [[User:Wozblod|Wozblod]] 18:41, 15 January 2010 (UTC)