CWCki - User contributions [en]

Chris and sex

2023-08-01T03:36:39Z

Xrcvy:

{{Honest}}
{{HealthDisclosure}}
{{Incomplete|Information regaring Chris' sexual frustration, and how he copes with it}}
[[Chris]] has a warped view of '''sexual intercourse''' (a.k.a. '''hanky-panky''' and '''romps in the hay'''<ref>Chris has used this phrase since approximately [[2018]], including in [[:File:SchuComic12-9Page29.JPG|Sonichu #12-9]], on his [[July 2018 social media posts#BronyCon thoughts|polyamorous marriage]] and on his [[Incest fallout chat leaks#Chris texts about incest with his mother|incest with his mother]].</ref>), mostly stemming from stunted sexual development, [[Borb|a sheltered upbringing]], and the [[Autism|twisted, disjointed]] [[Chris and reality|worldview]] he acquired as a result. He first developed an understanding of sex from watching softcore porn on HBO at around age 16. He describes pornographic films as "educational".<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#Chris Sets the Record STRAIGHT]]</ref>

==Knowledge of sex==
In his mind, Chris has mastered all there is to know about sex, and now regards himself as a bit of a guru. He has said that kissing a woman is "magical and delightful... sweet and melting like ice cream or chocolate", a description he [[Things Chris has ripped off|stole]] from ''[[Sailor Moon]]''.<ref>[[Mailbag 18#He might as well be talking about how to pilot the space shuttle|Mailbag 18]]</ref> In truth, for much of the time he was presenting this advice Chris had yet to even kiss a girl.<ref name="Jackie E-mails 2">[[Jackie E-mails 2]]</ref>

What he knows about sex he's picked up from rudimentary [[high school]] [[Dating education|sex education]] or [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|pornography]]. This has engendered many false beliefs in Chris, which he sticks to religiously. Readers who brave his [[Chris Sex Logs|sex chat logs]] should immediately notice what's going wrong – Chris's fantasies are merely recreations of what he's seen in pornos, rather than plausible sexual experiences. For example, he believed that [[Kacey]] would welcome a brutal tit-fucking followed by load after load of [[navy]] to the face.<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>

Other examples of Chris's crude misconceptions about sex abound. He mimics female porn stars' sex positions, spreads an imaginary vagina a yard across,<ref name="JR Eyes">[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]</ref> thinks that the clitoris is located on the female body where the [[wikipedia:Perineum|perineum]] is located on the male one<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts#Introducing the Un-clit]]</ref> and believes that electric shocks to the vagina are pleasurable.<ref name="Cums cat">[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]</ref> He also seems to believe that a woman's vagina is higher up on the woman's body that it actually is;<ref>[[:File:SchuComicSP3P7.jpg]]</ref> this is undoubtedly due to his experience with his [[Kimmi|sex]] [[Officer Nasty|dolls]]. The "missionary cowgirl" position mentioned in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] is a contradiction in terms. He can't even get the most basic double entendres correct, wearing a terrible [[CWC Cola|Mountain Dew]] parody shirt thinking it's an invitation for women to try and ride his broken [[penis]].<ref name="JR Eyes" /> He thinks that his [[Virgin with rage|virginity]] is a precious and sought-after treasure which women will come in droves to take (he even went so far as to use it as a bargaining chip to haggle with a prostitute), and believes that [[mass debating]] ultimately makes him better at sex.

With Chris's [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]], he is also noticeably confused about basic sexual terminology. For example, Chris told Ivy he had a "sticky dream" about her. When Ivy asked if he meant a wet dream, he replied, "No, that's when you pee yourself, silly!"<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#Threats]]</ref> While he may have the best of intentions, his word choices unwittingly present him in a very bad light. He refuses to use common terms – either medical or slang – for sex organs, instead calling penises "[[duck]]s" and "[[pickle]]s", and vaginas and vulvae "[[china]]" or "tom-tom" out of a childish aversion borne of disgust.

In [[August 2011]], Chris said he is into female domination.<ref>[[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]]</ref> (going as far as to draw Sonichu and Rosechu performing the act in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]).

===Reproductive Biology===
{{Main|Biology#Reproductive biology}}
[[File:Female anatomy according to chris.png|thumb|A moderately detailed portrait of what Chris probably thought females looked like before meeting [[Mia Hamm]].]]

Chris's understanding on reproductive biology had primarily come from what he had seen in porn.

===Books on the Subject===

Chris had obtained a copy of the book [[Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability]], which he had told [[Null]] about on 5 July 2021. As a result of reading this book, Chris came to believe that he could mentor people about dating and sex. Chris had especially shown this in conversations he had with [[the Suitress]], where he attempts to advise her on how to approach a potential lover when she goes off to college.<ref>[[Suitress DMs#Dating Advice]]</ref> Chris had seemed to twist or misunderstand many of the passages found in this book, taking it to be a book on how to perform sex on disabled people, rather than one ''for'' disabled people.

==Moral Basis==

{{Dated}}

===Straightness===

{{main|Chris and sexuality}}

Chris's stance on sexual orientations have always been iffy at best. Prior to his transition to a Tomgirl, he has shown a fear of losing his straightness. This obsessive demand for people to "STAY STRAIGHT" has been one of the first noted and exploited aspects of Chris since his discovery. Many trolls had jokingly declared this as an indicator of him repressing his sexuality in some fashion, only for it to end up being the case in the long run.

===Religion===
[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|thumb|250px|69ing? Intercourse? ''Really''? In a ''children's'' comic? Because they should know all about this stuff.]]
{{quote|You have heard that it was said by them of old time, You shall not commit adultery: but I say to you, that whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.|Matthew 5:27-28}}

Sex was at one point viewed, through Chris's eyes, by the Bible – or rather, by his religion, as Chris's Biblical knowledge is extremely poor. Chris was very strict on keeping to the word of God when male homosexuality is the topic, vehemently stating that he ''hates'' homos, but with no hesitation views lesbian porn and approves of it [[Mass debating|masturbatorily]]<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref>, and as of 2014, seemed to be adopting a more progressive view of even gay men and their rights (albeit begrudgingly). In 2015 Chris made a video lamenting his "past" homophobia and clarifying that he apparently now has great liking and admiration for male homosexuality, [[Retroactive continuity|retconning]] the viscous homophobic tirade of [[Sonichu 10]] into a bizarre zombie apocalypse, implying that he realizes religion is not an excuse for discrimination. Another violation of his Christian morals is the fact that he planned on losing his virginity on the [[Third date|third or fourth date]] with his true sweetheart (read: first girl who will last three dates with Chris). This is, of course, blatant violation of the Christian value of marriage before sex.

The Bible also frowns upon [[Nudes|pornographers]], of which he is very guilty and holds no apparent [[Chris and remorse|remorse]]. These double standards cause many trolls to despise him, seeing as he selectively chooses what to denigrate and what is OK in his own personal dogma, although to be fair, the same is true of many Christians anyway.

Despite people pointing out these contradictions, even quoting passages of the Bible, he will deny it. This is most likely because he goes to [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|a very liberal church]], so any question about premarital sex is probably interpreted quite liberally, and Chris believes that his church and ''only'' his church defines the entirety of religious morality - as it applies to him, anyway. When Chris asks Rocky about passages quoted to him by [[trolls]], she only fuels his à la carte Christianity by saying things like sex before marriage is okay as long as the couple is in love, which contradicts Christian doctrine.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> In summary, Chris picked and chose what parts of Christian doctrine suit his own prejudices, and disregards the ones that would interfere with his [[Love Quest]].

===Sexism===

Chris seems to consider a female sexual partner as a rubber stamp over his (alleged) sexual orientation. Flying in the face of any moral system he's ever held, he announced his desire to upload on the Internet a video of his first full sexual intercourse, even if his hypothetical partner refused to consent to it.<ref>[[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The Introduction Image Space is NOT Ad Space (CCS)]]</ref> After further prodding, he added that he would simply hide the camera, record the event without her consent and blur her face before making the video public.<ref>[[Mailbag 31#In which Chris crosses yet another line]]</ref> In [[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]], Chris indicated that if a woman accused him of being gay in person, he would sexually assault them by demanding they submit to a kiss and allow him to videotape the act, possibly as a way of proving his straightness.

For Chris, as stated above, [[Women's rights|a woman is just a living, sentient sex-toy]], existing only to validate him as a heterosexual. As long as they're straight and younger than him, of course.

==Chris in the act==
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|frame|right|Christian [[For Julie's Eyes Only|professing his love]] for "[[BlueSpike|Julie]]".]]
Leaked tapes of Chris's audio sex with [[Julie]], and the infamous sex tape with Kimmi shed light on Chris as he acts out on his fantasies. In particular, the sex tape shows how Chris assumes ''female'' positions, notably riding on top of Kimmi in a scene straight out of a porno. It seems that Chris's entirety of knowledge about sexual relationships stems from ignoring the [[JERKS|men]] in pornography (due to fear of becoming a [[homo]]).

However, it should be noted that in most of Chris's Rule 34 drawings the characters do tend to assume positions which are fitting for their gender, including Chris.<ref>For examples, see the [[Sonichu 8#The uncensored scenes|uncensored panels]] from Sonichu 8, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]], the [[Giant Penis Comic]] and [[Jackie E-mails 14]].</ref> It might be that Chris adopts female positions not so much due to ignorance regarding sex, but more because of [[Tomgirl pictures|his identification with the opposite gender]].

Chris's view of cunnilingus, put on display in [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]], involves slobbering all over a woman's vagina. Despite all his knowledge of porn, he fails to see how cunnilingus is more than just slobbering, but proper tongue action to stimulate the clitoris.

In the leaked media, Chris displays that he may have some issues with delayed orgasm. This can either be physiological (bent duck, [[Obesity|being overweight]], lack of endurance) or psychological in nature (performance anxiety, high expectations, intrusive homoerotic thoughts, subconscious guilt about sex), or a combination thereof.

In the 2018 [[All Star]] video, Chris is seen tugging his [[duck]] along to the song. He remains flaccid the entire time; his inability to get an erection is possibly a side effect of [[Transgender|HRT]]. If this is true, Chris will certainly not be getting any hanky-panky in the future.

During his time losing his virginity to a [[Mia Hamm| prostitute]] its worth noting that he first received a blowjob, then demanded cowgirl before possible missionary later; [[Obesity| but luckily for her]] he couldn't last very long and finished just after she rid him for a bit; this is important as it points to 2 big problems with Chris; first his lack of self control due to him [[Navy| finishing]] so quickly, second is that he ordered possibly the laziest sex position in the book, with Mia doing pretty much all of the physical exercise with Chris being a lazy fuck.

Chris's second sexual partner in his life was none other than his own [[Barb|mom]], the exact details of the [[Affair with Mother|incestuous affair]] is a bit vague but needless to say every act described by Chris is extremely disturbing and not for the faint of heart.

===Contraceptives===

{{quote|Confidentially, I wear a condom during the second half when I masturbate; I use Trojan or LIfestyles brand (Trojan mostly)

And I used condoms when I fooled with the [[Officer Nasty|L.D.s]] as well.|Chris, [[Jackie E-mails 1]]}}

Condoms, or as Chris has called them "'''raincoats'''", are thin latex coverings worn over a man's penis for the purpose of birth control. However, Chris seemed to understand the condom as more of a symbol for promoting safe premarital sex rather than as a contraceptive. Aside from promoting safe sex and justifying premarital sex, Chris has also drawn his male Sonichu characters with condoms in order to censor their penises. Chris has stated that before his third date with [[Blanca]], he'd wear a condom for the first two times they've had sex, only to have non-protected sex by the third date, showing that he also believed that condoms serve more as some kind of gateway to pregnancy. Chris had a box of chocolate-flavored condoms that he purchased to be prepared for his first time. Chris had given a few different dates for when they expired; some time in 2010 <ref>[[Chris Sex Logs#Condoms]]</ref> and January 2013.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>

Chris reportedly also wore a condom that was flavored like green apple while engaging in sex with Mia Hamm.<ref>[[July 2020 social media posts]]</ref>. Its not entirely clear whether the condom was entirely successful or not due to him mentioning that a "Smidge" of Navy had leaked out after their first round together, meaning he either kept them in his pocket far too long, the condom didn't fit entirely properly around his [[Duck]], he became flaccid way faster than he should have, or he's an idiot who mistook a smear of lube or vaginal discharge for semen; knowing Chris any of these [[Chris and negligence| explanations]] [[Duck| are]] [[Health| equally]] [[Slow in the minds| possible]]. For those wondering however, it's probably safe to assume [[Mia Hamm]] won't be harboring [[Crystal]] any time soon; even by some non-existent chance he managed to get her pregnant, she would have likely been on the pill anyway.

Chris would later reveal to [[Null]] that he was using a condom while having sex with his "over 50 girlfriend", who was later discovered to be [[Barb]]. While ploughing a woman like Barb would cause anyone to instinctively wear the thickest condom available, then get themselves tested a few times over just in case (all of which Chris did); realistically there wasn't much reason to do so since the risk of STD and pregnancy was non-existent since both were [[Health|(at least where STIs were concerned)]] clean and both were completely infertile.

== Sexual Frustration ==

Chris has had a yearning to have a girl to have sex with since the start of his [[Love Quest]] in 2003. The first manifestation of this was when he was clawing at [[Megan]] where his pining for her went ignored or denied as any sane person would.

Throughout the first half of [[2021]], Chris' search for a sweetheart had resumed. Chris has expressed great sexual frustration, yearning for a physical girl to have sex with over his [[polyamorous marriage|ficticious sweethearts]]. According to [[Kyle]], at some point in [[February 2021]] Chris expressed interest in wanting to get a hooker,<ref name=feb21hooker>[[The Place chats (March 2021)#Chris wanted a hooker]]</ref> something which Chris was once not in favor of.

In [[March 2021]], following a masturbation session, Chris had a conversation with the [[Watchmen]], in which he discussed how, despite not disliking or disapproving of the act of masturbation, he felt that he was [[Gender dysphoria|born the wrong gender]].<ref>[[Masturbation discussions#16 March 2021]]</ref> In a [[May 2021]] conversation, he claimed that over the years, he would continually consume pornography and masturbate to get "the hard-on". He expressed how until recently, he felt that he had not fully explored his sexuality, nor any other means to stimulate himself, and even then claims to still overthink the process of [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|inserting a dildo or vibrator up his ass]]. <ref>[[Masturbation discussions#18 May 2021]]</ref>

==Means of Coping with Sexual Frustration==

=== Masturbation and Porn Consumption ===

{{Main|Mass debating}}

Chris has had a history of masturbating, starting when he discovered he could stimulate his penis by rubbing it against a washcloth when he was 15. In 2009, he made use of a washbasin in the kitchen of his house while performing the act, and had claimed in the [[Ivy Q&A]] that he made use of a pillow that he'd fold in half, treating it as a mastrubation tool. Since then, masturbation has been an outlet for Chris's sexual frustration.

In a [[February 2021]] conversion with [[The Watchmen]], Chris said "Masturbation takes Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes, with my body, regardless of whatever method or tool utilized. And it has literally been that long in unenjoyable time since I first rubbed one out while my body was 15. And that was Looooong before I ever started on HRT in 2016. So, not only is masturbation out of the question, it's more misery-inducing."<ref>[[Masturbation discussions#27 February 2021]]</ref>

=== Drawing Porn ===

{{quote|As for the drawing itself, I've realized that it was done not only out of inspired fantasy, angst against E.D., and love for you, but also a major release for my crazy, mixed-up hormones. If I didn't have the foresight to put my pent-up frustrations and feelings in the form of something, I might have become an abusive maniac, so thank god for allowing me to release my bottled up frustrations in a more positive, yet not so "Politically Correct", and not physically hurting others, method.|Chris on how he might have approached Megan had he not drawn [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]<ref>[[Megan Emails, 2008#Chris continues bothering her about ED]]</ref>}}

Chris has on more than one ocassion drawn pornography of his own in order to release sexual tension. Chris claimed to [[Megan Schroeder]] that he had in part created the controversial drawing [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]] because he felt that doing so would inhibit him from sexually advancing on Megan, as he had feelings for her, and would have become an "abusive maniac" had he not created the drawing. The fact that Chris had decided to use what was essentially a product of his own pent-up sexual frustration as a means of attempting to get his Encyclopedia Dramatica page down only seemed to leave a much more bitter taste in Megan's mouth after announcing this.

During the period when Chris became much more sexually frustrated in 2021, he displayed this more openly towards friends, and even on his social media. He sent a picture of his Chris Chan Sonichu persona wearing a [[negligee]] while giving a seductive look to [[The WCT]], and talked to him about how arousing it is to wear one.

=== Sex Toys ===

Chris has made [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|numberable purchases]] for sex toys, porn DVDs and inflatable sex dolls.

=== Relationships with OCs ===

For a time, partly due to influence from the [[Idea Guys]], Chris has temporarily given up on his search for a sweetheart in pursuit for being in relationships with fictional characters instead.

=== Wet Dreams ===

Chris has also had his share of wet [[dreams]], particularly whenever he had held strong feelings for his flavor of the week. The first of these wet dreams was of [[PandaHalo]], where he dreamed about the both of them getting naked, having sex, and then Chris finally climaxing. Chris also had a dream where he was in a labyrinth filled with water, where he met a woman and had sex with her, Chris recreated the dream in a Flipnote animation. The strangest of these was of one where Chris claims that he "almost had sex" with the Sonic character Sally Acorn, which had left him sexually frustrated afterwards. Chris talks about another wet dream he had two months later, this time of the ''Sonic X'' character Chris Thorndyke aged-up and "handsome". Chris also expresses the sexual frustration he felt after waking up from this dream too.<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref>

=== Sex with Mother ===

It had long been joked and speculated by trolls, christorians, and observers alike that Chris has much more intimate feelings with [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] than he let on. These speculations were confirmed in July of 2021 when screenshots were leaked of Chris detailing to Isabella Loretta Janke his incestuous exploits. Null later revealed worrying conversations he had previously with Chris about a new "over 50's" girlfriend he had been using condoms with. We will leave it to you to put 2 and 2 together.

==Sexual Deviance==

Chris's skewed basis of his understanding of sex leads him to exhibiting several instances of sexual deviance.

===Innappropriate Interactions with Women===

To say the least, Chris's social interactions hinder his ability to understand sex etiquette.

===Pedophilia and Age Disparity===
{{main|Pedofork}}
{{Wise|he is a pedophile.}}

Pedophilia has always been a touchy subject in regards to Chris. Chris had at first attempted to deny all claims that he was a pedophile, even creating a new word "pedofork", as a sort of comeback to those who refered to him as such, being created solely to make the word rhyme in "I'm not a pedofork, you dorks". Chris has tried to retain this image by removing any references that may be interpreted as him being a pedophile in his Sonichu comics. Most infamously, Chris had characters in [[Sonichu 8]] make comments about "dumb laws" when [[Zapina Rosechu]], who is 14 years old, asks to participate in stripping for Women's Rights.

At a glance, Chris seems to adhere to the age of consent, once advertising on his [[Attraction Sign|Attraction Signs]] that he would only date someone of legal age. Chris however does not seem to understand or care about how creepy it is for him to be attracted to women that are half his age, and seems to see it as yet another barrier for his Love Quest. Chris has cat-called an artist whom he believed to be "entering young adulthood", has made sexual remarks towards [[Bella]]; despite her having no interest in Chris, and has shown arousal when [[the Suitress]] exposed herself to him.

===Necrophillia===

While Chris himself has never engaged in sex with a dead body, Chris has [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|recently]] been referring to barb as a zombie like husk since even before they began engaging in [[Affair with Mother| their affair]] and that her soul has already moved on to her rosechu form in C-197; complaining that her lifeless body was still clinging to life and preventing him from going back home. Meaning that Chris is at least partially comfortable with the idea of having sex with his dead mother.

In another disturbing instant, Chris recorded [[It's not that cold]] where he proceeds to imitate buffalo bill and pretends to get inside his dead dog [[Patti]], while not engaging in sex with her he does take a bizarre sexual pleasure in wearing her corpse (or at least pretending to since he was too lazy to actually dig her up).

===Bestiality===
{{quote|I can imagine myself doing it with a [[Patti-chan|collie]] at least. you know, like Lassie.|Chris to [[PandaHalo]]<ref name="collie">[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>}}
[[File:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Run, Patti, run!]]
[[File:Super-mode.jpg|thumb|left|90px|Chris, sporting a [[ECV 00002‎|homemade fursuit]].]]

In [[December 2008]], Chris told [[PandaHalo]] he would be willing to have sex with a female dog for her.<ref name="collie" /> However, in his [[Chris-chan Discusses...‎|interview with ScrewAttackEurope]], Chris says he's against bestiality, then hoists himself by his own petard by claiming that Sonichu & co. are not "half-humans" but "all-animals" with human form; so technically this isn't bestiality, as they're animals having sex with each other.

Chris suggested that Brian from ''[[Family Guy]]'' be paired up with "any sexy breed" of dog.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20161007175309/http://archive.sonichu.com:80/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Family_Guy The Family Guy article on CWCipedia]</ref>

In [[The Red-Maned Deer]], Chris recites a poem he wrote about having sex with a deer, but at the end of it states, "This was, in fact, NOT an act of bestiality. For you see, the Red-Maned Deer I have been communicating with and tracking, is really...my lo-my womanly sweetheart, named [[Jacklyn Romy]]."<ref>[[The Red-Maned Deer]]</ref> The fact that the deer is Jackie is obvious, but in spite of this he explicitly stated that it was her at the end.

In a photo of the [[Rental House]] from June 2014, the Chandler minivan bears a bumper sticker reading "I Sleep with Dogs".<ref>[[:File:Chandler Cars 1600w.jpg]]</ref> What exactly this means is yet to be determined.

====Is Chris a furry?====
{{Wise|he is a furry.}}

{{quote|I am half-Sonichu and half-Pokemon, thus making me a "furry".|Chris, May 2018, during the aftermath of the [[Idea Guys]] saga.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20220209025754/https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/997320832040005634</ref>}}

Whether Chris could actually be considered a furry was debated for a long time.<ref>From [[Sarah May Skype Logs#Chris tries to leave|the Sarah May Skype Logs]]: [7:17:25] '''Sarah May''': Did you feel sexually aroused when you drew them? [7:17:34] '''Christopher C.W.C.''': a bit.</ref> There are some things that point in that direction. Chris certainly gets aroused by provocative drawings of anthropomorphic animals (at least when they are [[Sonic]] characters), and he has drawn unsolicited porn of his own Sonic recolors. [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] is in many ways similar to a fursona, and Chris even role-played the character while cybering with [[Julie]].<ref name="Cums cat" /> Finally, in the [[Giant Penis Comic]], Chris and [[Ivy]] both transform into anthropomorphic animals during the act of sex. On the other hand, [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] noted that Chris was prejudiced against a male furry who patronized [[The GAMe PLACe]] because he happened to be [[gay]].<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Racism and homophobia]]</ref> Given the high proportion of gay and bisexual men in the furry fandom, Classic Chris would almost certainly have been uncomfortable at any kind of furry gathering.

In [[May 2018]], under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], Chris declared himself a furry.<ref>[[May_2018_social_media_posts#Michael_Hirtes_BTFO]]</ref> The Idea Guys also [[brainwashed]] him into believing he is in a [[polyamorous marriage]] with his anthropomorphic [[imaginary friends]] [[Magi-Chan]] and [[Cryzel]], and Chris believes he has had sexual relations with these imaginary friends.<ref>[[July 2018 social media posts#BronyCon thoughts]]</ref>

Also of note is that in [[July 2020|mid-2020]], he binge-watched the [[Netflix]] anime ''BNA: Brand New Animal'', commenting it was "very good" but said nothing further than that.<ref>[[July_2020_social_media_posts#Animu]]</ref>

While Chris may loosely qualify as a furry due to his obsession with anthropomorphic [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]] and [[My Little Pony|ponies]], he has never shown an interest in the broader furry community.

===Oedipus Complex===
{{-}}

==Prostitution==
[[Image:Virginbreaker.png|thumb|Chris's leaked [[Facebook]] announcement that he had lost his virginity. Initially igniting a firestorm of controversy, Chris himself let it slip that she was found "somewhere on the backpage" soon after.]]

Given how badly Chris wanted to lose his virginity, many observers have wondered why he didn't immediately spend some of his [[tugboat]] on a prostitute. [[Mumble 4]], from [[February 2009]], answered that question for a while. There, Chris explained that paying for sex would render the act "meaningless," and he was – in a rare display of common sense – afraid of contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

Needs must as the devil drives, though. While being blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of [[2009]], Chris attempted to solicit the services of a Craigslist prostitute to fuck on camera so he could recover his hacked [[PlayStation Network]] accounts. After describing his personal problems to the prostitute, she hung up on him. Chris was apparently trying to get free sex from the hooker with long, rambling stories about his horrible life to try and gain sympathy. He was genuinely shocked when she didn't offer to fuck him out of pity, unaware that prostitutes, by definition, only have sex with men for money.

Previously, in [[March 2009]], [[Bryan Bash]] had sent a trio of prostitutes to [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] so he would no longer be a virgin with rage. [[Hooker incident|Hilarity ensued]].

By the beginning of [[2010]], Chris's views on prostitution had further softened. According to his [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|conversations with Vivian Gee]], around the turn of the year he was attempting to save $100 out of his monthly budget to buy himself a whore for his 28th [[birthday]]. This, presumably, was the "hundred dollars for a damn hooker" he referred to when [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|begging the Wallflower for sex]] on YouTube in [[March 2010]].

Between [[April 2010|April]] and [[July 2010]], under the name of [[Carlos Chantor]], Chris tried to offer himself up as a male escort. He described himself as "[[Chris and reality|Experienced for Her Pleasure]]", with an [[obesity|average]] body type.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref>

Later, under the guise of his troll persona [[JenkinsJinkies]], Chris attempted to acquire the contact details of the hookers Brian Bash had previously hired. While it is possible that Chris merely wished to make his disguise more convincing by implying that 14 year old Jenkins wished to hire prostitutes, it seems far more likely that Chris actually was considering hiring Brian's girls.

In [[April 2012]] a [[Facebook]] status leaked in which Chris announced that he was no longer a virgin. Suspicion arose that this was due to the help of a hooker. Chris provided further evidence suggesting that [[Mia Hamm|the girl]] was a prostitute on 1 [[May 2012|May]] when he wrote in a [[Facebook#Hey, Trollies|Facebook note]] that his virgin breaker can be found "somewhere on the [[Wikipedia:Backpage|backpage]]", a website known for featuring sex service ads.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20210206132219/https://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/19/opinion/kristof-not-quite-a-teen-yet-sold-for-sex.html?_r=1]</ref> On 28/29 June 2014 Chris openly admitted that his first time was with a prostitute, and that he had sex with her twice.<ref>[[Other documents#Chris's wingman]]</ref>

In [[June 2016]], Chris himself made [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|another attempt]] to enter the prostitution business, now as a [[Tomgirl|trans woman]], going by the name "Stephanie Bustcakes". Predictably, Chris was unable to find any "women of any orientation" who were interested in paying him $100 to have sex either "one way or the lesbian way", and the Stephanie Bustcakes persona has not yet reappeared.

[[File:ChrisChanSexForMoney.png|thumb|200px]]
On 24 April 2018, while under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], who had allegedly been extorting him out of thousands of dollars, Chris announced:<ref>[[April 2018 social media posts#Will provide house tour and suck dicks for money]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Anyone living locally to me in Virginia, or visiting in Charlottesville, I’ll give y’all BJs for money too. Serious.}}

A fan on Twitter messaged him about it. In their conversation, Chris said:<ref name=price>[[:File:NAME YOUR PRICE!!.jpeg]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Consider me a beginner with experience blowing [[Cryzel and Magi-Chan|my loving boyfriend]], willing to learn and adapt further. $50 for that BJ from this celeb; if he wants butt sex, that will be $100. Cash only.}}

Chris told [[CWCProtectSquad]] member Tings Tingz that he was indeed serious about prostituting himself, had several offers, but had not taken on any customers. When asked if he would consider, Chris responded, "a little from Column 'A' and the latter from Column 'B'".<ref>[[Tings Tingz DMs#Prostitution post]]</ref>

After the [[Guard Dogs]] rescued Chris from the Idea Guys' influence, he reversed course and disavowed the prostitution messages on 7 May 2018, saying he had been coerced.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20191107173201/https://twitter.com/cwcsonichu/status/993693423084318720</ref> He went further on 25 May, saying he had been forced to write such things, and implied the Idea Guys had been behind it.<ref>[[May 2018 social media posts#Calling out the Idea Guys]]</ref>

According to [[Kyle]], in [[February 2021]], Chris wanted a hooker and asked Kyle to ask [[Null]] to get him one.<ref name=feb21hooker></ref>

==Incest==
{{See also|Affair with Mother}}
{{Split Off}}
{{Quote|I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with [[Barbara Chandler|my mother]].|Chris, 2016}}

[[File:CWCSonichu Rule34.jpeg|thumb|Chris having sex with his "son," Sonichu, in order to fulfill a prophecy to bring Crystal into the world.]]

Chris has long been suspected of having unnatural feelings about [[sex]] and family.

In [[2007]], Chris attempted to shock [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] into submission by posting his own [[Rule 34]] drawings, including one of himself [[Shecameforcwc.jpg|fingerbanging a nude brunette woman]]. ED users immediately concluded this was Crystal, Chris's imaginary twin sister in the comics. This charge infuriated Chris and therefore became the conventional wisdom. By the time Chris successfully convinced anyone that it was really [[Megan Schroeder]] in the drawing, the notion that Chris wants to bang his imaginary twin sister had already stuck.

[[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]], Chris's imaginary twin sister, appeared as a [[:image:153-GirlfriendsGift.jpg|"girlfriend" card]] he made for ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'', and her attractiveness and desirability are brought up several times in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] comics well after being established as Chris's twin. Chris has shown complete ignorance in matters incestuous before; his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] are all related (despite their type and appearance differences, they all come from [[homos|Sonic and the same male Pikachu]] – apart from that fact, they were all created by Chris and acknowledge him as such – Sonichu and Rosechu calling him father), but many of them are paired off with one another (notably Sonichu/Rosechu, Bubbles/Blake, and Magi/Silvana – Simonla was technically made by someone else), banging and some even [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|having]] [[Sandy Rosechu|kids]]. Chris's own comic children are a form of incest – as Chris impregnated himself with his navy. Chris shrugs off [[Autism|all medical/science facts]] and lists the two as perfectly healthy and Autism Free.

Chris first expounded his views on incest to the internet on 31 [[January 2009]] during the [[Mumble 1|first Mumble chat]], when it was revealed that he did not fully understood the meaning of the word "incest". While he showed aversion toward incest in the chat, his condemnation of it was lukewarm, saying that he would only "definitely discourage that" and that lesbian incest is "possibly OK" due to no reproduction being involved. Compare this to his statements about male homosexuality from the same chat ("I hate homo males [...] I'd sooner have a [[Tomgirl Saga|sex change]] before I would ever turn into a homo") or to his statements about male homosexuality from earlier that month, saying that he would make it a crime and force its practitioners into having sex with members of the opposite gender.<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]]</ref>

A year later, Chris's views became staunch. When a correspondent in the [[Mailbag]] pointed out that Chris's state allows cousin marriage but not same-sex marriage, Chris furiously denied it and wrote, "Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN MOTHER OR FATHER!"<ref>[[Common Questions#5 January 2010]]</ref> When another correspondent responded to Chris by saying that he is happily married to his cousin and that their marriage is indeed legal in Virginia, Chris answered him by saying he was destined to hell for his relationship,<ref>[[Mailbag 34#Good luck in hell]]</ref> not realizing that incest is shown in a positive light in [[Chris and religion|the Bible]]. When the subject came up again in the next mailbag, Chris said that sexual relations between cousins are just as wrong as incest between parents and their children or between siblings, and that all those relationships were condemned in the "same part" of the Bible,<ref>[[Mailbag 35#I think he wanted a specific verse]]</ref> which is not actually true.<ref> [https://web.archive.org/web/20051223102404/http://www.cousincouples.com/?page=religion]</ref> In [[February 2010]], Chris notably did not react to [[:File:Fkinglie.png|an extremely NSFW ad of himself]] on the [[CWCipedia]] depicting himself fingering Barb [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|like he did with a former friend in a certain illustration]], despite reacting to [[I am Alive|an ad claiming that he was dead]].

During the [[Idea Guy]] saga, the troll convinced Chris that [[Magi-Chan]] foretold of a prophecy in which [[Crystal]] would be born by Chris mating with Sonichu. He also informed Chris that if this was drawn, he wouldn't have to do it in real life. Chris complied<ref>https://archive.md/AL1PT</ref>. During the nonsensical [[Sonichu 13| issue 13]] of Sonichu incest is unsurprisingly everywhere, from [[Chris Chan Sonichu]] getting married to [[Magichan]] to Chris and Sonichu raping each other.

To the [[Watchmen]], Chris chatted about how he was upset over implications of incest in the ''Sonichu'' family, stating that he had written a piece to dispute the "ugh, Incest bullshit."<ref>[[Chats leaked by MKRs Bloody Chunks#Ugh, Incest]]</ref>

In a Facebook post from [[January 2020]], Chris reiterated his opposition to incest, writing "I, personally, seriously disapprove of incest and would never practice it at all" and "The Bottom Line is: Incest is Never 'Wincest' (Epic UGH!)".<ref>[[January 2020 social media posts#Incest is not wincest]]</ref>

===Dreams of sex with Barb===
On 10 August 2016, Chris posted a [[Facebook statuses|response]] to a mother-son couple who were arrested for incest. He admitted to "[having] dreams of having sex with my mother" but "Never acting on them ever." Among other things, he also implied that incest "offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s)." All this is in stark contrast to his earlier condemnation of incest, which raises the question of whether Chris was being TRUE and HONEST but changed his opinion later thanks to his growing degeneracy, or the likelier possibility it was [[Hypocrisy|all for show]].

{{quotebox|I have a few things to say in response to this article. Firstly, the child was over 18, and surely the mother has talked it out with him beforehand. The child might have had social problems, or a situation where socializing or going out to socialize with other people, was a Greater Difficulty. Financial situation to prevent paying someone else to come over and help out in the situation. Moreover, it was the lifelong affections between parent and child. Also, the mother probably could not bear any ovum for children anymore.
Anyhow, who among Everyone in this world has not had a dream of having sex with one of their parents? Never acting on them ever, I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with my mother.
Although incest is quite controversial topic, but there are circumstances where there would be not so much harm as one may think, feel or believe. The child is over 18; the mother is unable to have any more children at the time; birth control and protection is available and can be used (in a case of father/daughter, birth control Definitely should be used anyhow). Also, consider if the child is adopted; not as much biological.
Plus, this offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s). The schools can only teach from books; not so much practice. And Nobody wants to end up being a 20 or 30-plus year old Virgin. I know; That is a Huge, Enduring Pain.
Unless the sex act was abusive, hurtful, or Would result in an unwanted birth of a physical or mental challenged child, I would not judge or persecute the parent and child. I would encourage the child to socialize more; maybe make it easier for the child to meet more people his/her age.
Do Not send the mother and son to jail!}}

On 13 September 2019, while [[Spirit possession|role-playing]] as Magi-Chan, Chris would describe Barb as a "guilty pleasure waifu."<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Barbara was more of a "guilty pleasure" waifu]]</ref>

===Actual sex with Barb===

While the prospect of Chris having sex with Barb was joked about for many years, most people did not believe Chris would actually go through with it. Before the [[Incest call]] was leaked, there were numerous warning signs of what was to come, mainly being the fact Barb would force Chris to spoon her in bed for many years, and telling Mia Hamm that the sexual massage he gave her was the same that he gave his mother. Their actions around each other have indicated a history of incestuous interest, however many just assumed that this was a combination of Chris's [[autism]] making him act inappropriately and Barb's infamously controlling behaviour.

After the incest calls were leaked it was revealed that Chris had been engaging in regular sex with Barb every 3 nights or so since 27 June 2021. His "seduction" methods included giving her full body massages while making attempts to finger her, kissing her on the lips with Barb refusing to open her mouth and Chris making "Psychic connections" with her before, during and after their romps in the hay.

It's also noteworthy that Chris refers to Barb as "Barbie Chan" almost exclusively now; whether this has something to do with her supposed anime fanfiction characteristics, a bizarre pet name or Chris trying to subconsciously distance himself from their familial bonds is unknown.

==Rape==
{{Protip|It has not been officially proven that Chris has raped his mother, though he also alludes to Barb being "zombie-like" months before he started his affair with her in jail letters.}}

Chris was very apathetic about the idea of consent, and to a larger extent, the act of rape. When [[PandaHalo]] told him she was raped by [[Clyde Cash]], he reacted nonchalantly. He even thought it would be appropriate for Panda to ''move in'' with her rapist ([[Chris and religion|which is technically in-line with certain archaic Christian principles]]), whom he called a "good man" for regretting the rape and for being willing to take care of the ensuing child.<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref> Later on, long after the PandaHalo saga was over, he would wish her and her rapist a happy marriage.<ref>[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)#Sarah Cassandra McKenzie, A.K.A. PandaHalo]]</ref> In [[iPods Down and Listen Up]], he didn't seem to realize that his improvised lyrics detailed a sexual act that would almost certainly be construed by others as rape. Chris eventually compared his ordeals with the trolls, particularly during the [[Christorical eras|Classic Era]] to rape in his Facebook posts. (Since [[BlueSpike]]'s [[Julie Reveals Herself|most infamous incident]] involved an act that could be described as sexual abuse in front of several people, this is admittedly a fitting description.)

As far as ''Chris'' being a potential rapist is concerned, the situation was more complicated. For starters, as explained earlier, he admitted that he drew [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] to prevent himself from acting on his sexual impulses against [[Megan Schroeder]], who had previously scolded him for inappropriately touching her. During a particularly [[IRC (23 July 2009)|disturbing chat]], he ([[:File:BillRiley.jpg|incognito]]) suggested that the trolls try to convince him to rape [[Rocky Shoemaker]]. He also evidently saw no issue with rape by fraud (essentially having sex with someone while tricking them into believing you're somebody else, meaning they didn't consent with you) as seen with his comic book counterpart when he travels forwards in time to have sex with his future wife [[Lovely Weather]] in the guise of being his future self [[Transgender|(whom is definitely a different person in the future)]]. During the [[Kacey Calls]], he attempted unsuccessfully to lure her to his place in the guise of being [[Liquid Chris]], again seeing absolutely nothing wrong with that.

In all likelihood, though, these parts of his behavior are most likely explained by the keys to understanding his behavior overall: his ignorance about the world and his persecution complex causes him to be quite [[naïve]] about how bad rape actually is. With the Rocky situation above, he likely said that as part of an odd, roundabout scheme to get the trolls arrested, but it's still pretty fucked up that he'd even suggest something like this, let alone tell her about it after.

Chris has a surprisingly mature moral opinion on the subject of abortion in cases of rape; in one of the [[Kacey Calls]], he states he believes that abortion in these cases should be the choice of the victim only and that they should not be pressured by others in their decision.

Despite joking about how uncomfortably close he was to his own mother, few actually believed that Chris had it in him to commit an act of rape. For instance, he tried to kiss [[Emily]] and gave up when she said no,<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#A precious farewell (1:29:35–1:31:10)]]</ref> showing that he does understand the importance of consent... Or at least, he ''used'' to. Unfortunately, it seems that as of 2014, he has decided that he won't take "no" for an answer, and basically ''molested'' [[Catherine#The Date|Catherine during their second outing]] by hugging her and burying his head in her breasts even after she flatly told him not to. This gets even more disturbing when you consider [[Catherine E-mails#It IS Your Fault!|this e-mail]], where Chris outright says that he's [[Chris and his Ego|"entitled to a relationship"]]. Also not helping matters was Chris kissing multiple guests who posed with him at the [[TooManyGames]] convention regardless of consent, which ultimately got him kicked out.

Furthermore, it was argued that Chris didn't have a history of violence conducive to attempting sexual assault. Aside from his [[Death threats#Likelihood of Acting Out on Death Threats|habit of dishing out threats he can't possibly carry out]], [[28 October 2011|hitting Michael Snyder with a car]], and [[26 December 2014|macing a manager in the chest]], Chris is physically [[Chris and health|very weak and unfit]], and simply could not overpower an able-bodied person – the only outcome of him attempting it would be a swift knee to the [[duck]] followed by a rousing round of [[Kick the Autistic|America's favorite game]]. However, given Catherine's experience with Chris during their outing (in her words, she was taken by surprise and couldn't react to it), it was encouraged that women should exercise caution around him.

Interestingly, Chris details in [[Announcement 06292016]] that he wants all men to stay an arm's length distance away from him. Along with showing the insecurities he possesses concerning men, Chris seems to think that he is [[Chris and his ego|an attractive enough]] [[Transgender|transwoman]] for [[Jacob Sockness|a man]] to consider raping him.

Questions of whether or not Chris was capable of rape have been discussed previously among observers, but the situation became much more complicated in [[2021]] following Chris's [[Affair with Mother|incest]] with [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]], which has not been proven to be consensual or non-consensual despite circumstantial evidence pointing toward the latter. In light of the information revealed through the [[Incest call]] and other outlets from around the same time, it's unclear whether or not Barb agreed to have sex with her son or if he forced himself onto her, and as such, it is not clear if Chris is actually a rapist. Chris noted that Barb appeared to be "partially confused" during certain sexual encounters, which fueled longtime speculation she could have a degenerative mental disease, which would thus make her unable to consent.

For what it's worth, Chris mentioned that Barb made the first move, which would be consistent with certain inappropriate behavior that she got Chris to do earlier in life (such as asking him to spoon with her). As there is little context as to what happened during the incestuous affair, [[List of Chris's lies|as Chris is known for being an unreliable source of information]], and as Barb has not spoken about the subject, it cannot clearly be confirmed to be rape without a proper criminal investigation. Chris has also not been charged with rape despite spending months in jail, awaiting his trial for the incest charge. With Barb being declared mentally competent enough to live on her own in 14 Branchland Court, it is unlikely that rape charges will be pursued without her testimony, and even then, that would only happen if she decides to throw Chris under the bus. In the event that the affair was consensual, Barb would also most likely want to avoid incriminating herself, as she herself could face a charges if she was a willing participant.

==See also==
* [[Affair with Mother]]
* [[China]]
* [[Chris and his Ego]]
* [[Chris and sexuality]]
* [[Chris Sex Logs]]
* [[Duck]]
* [[Homos]]
* [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases]]
* [[Mass debating]]
* [[Naive]]
* [[Pickle]]
* [[Biology#Reproductive biology|Reproductive Biology]]
* [[Semen]]
* [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]]
* [[Women's rights]]

== References ==
<references/>
{{articleofthenow}}
{{Love quest}}
{{Chris and}}
[[Category:Concepts influenced by Idea Guy]]

Chris and sex

2023-08-01T03:34:27Z

Xrcvy: Started on Chris’s sexual frustration in early love saga years (statement saying he’d rape Meagan if he didint draw she came for cwc)

{{Honest}}
{{HealthDisclosure}}
{{Incomplete|Information regaring Chris' sexual frustration, and how he copes with it}}
[[Chris]] has a warped view of '''sexual intercourse''' (a.k.a. '''hanky-panky''' and '''romps in the hay'''<ref>Chris has used this phrase since approximately [[2018]], including in [[:File:SchuComic12-9Page29.JPG|Sonichu #12-9]], on his [[July 2018 social media posts#BronyCon thoughts|polyamorous marriage]] and on his [[Incest fallout chat leaks#Chris texts about incest with his mother|incest with his mother]].</ref>), mostly stemming from stunted sexual development, [[Borb|a sheltered upbringing]], and the [[Autism|twisted, disjointed]] [[Chris and reality|worldview]] he acquired as a result. He first developed an understanding of sex from watching softcore porn on HBO at around age 16. He describes pornographic films as "educational".<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#Chris Sets the Record STRAIGHT]]</ref>

==Knowledge of sex==
In his mind, Chris has mastered all there is to know about sex, and now regards himself as a bit of a guru. He has said that kissing a woman is "magical and delightful... sweet and melting like ice cream or chocolate", a description he [[Things Chris has ripped off|stole]] from ''[[Sailor Moon]]''.<ref>[[Mailbag 18#He might as well be talking about how to pilot the space shuttle|Mailbag 18]]</ref> In truth, for much of the time he was presenting this advice Chris had yet to even kiss a girl.<ref name="Jackie E-mails 2">[[Jackie E-mails 2]]</ref>

What he knows about sex he's picked up from rudimentary [[high school]] [[Dating education|sex education]] or [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|pornography]]. This has engendered many false beliefs in Chris, which he sticks to religiously. Readers who brave his [[Chris Sex Logs|sex chat logs]] should immediately notice what's going wrong – Chris's fantasies are merely recreations of what he's seen in pornos, rather than plausible sexual experiences. For example, he believed that [[Kacey]] would welcome a brutal tit-fucking followed by load after load of [[navy]] to the face.<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>

Other examples of Chris's crude misconceptions about sex abound. He mimics female porn stars' sex positions, spreads an imaginary vagina a yard across,<ref name="JR Eyes">[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]</ref> thinks that the clitoris is located on the female body where the [[wikipedia:Perineum|perineum]] is located on the male one<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts#Introducing the Un-clit]]</ref> and believes that electric shocks to the vagina are pleasurable.<ref name="Cums cat">[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]</ref> He also seems to believe that a woman's vagina is higher up on the woman's body that it actually is;<ref>[[:File:SchuComicSP3P7.jpg]]</ref> this is undoubtedly due to his experience with his [[Kimmi|sex]] [[Officer Nasty|dolls]]. The "missionary cowgirl" position mentioned in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] is a contradiction in terms. He can't even get the most basic double entendres correct, wearing a terrible [[CWC Cola|Mountain Dew]] parody shirt thinking it's an invitation for women to try and ride his broken [[penis]].<ref name="JR Eyes" /> He thinks that his [[Virgin with rage|virginity]] is a precious and sought-after treasure which women will come in droves to take (he even went so far as to use it as a bargaining chip to haggle with a prostitute), and believes that [[mass debating]] ultimately makes him better at sex.

With Chris's [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]], he is also noticeably confused about basic sexual terminology. For example, Chris told Ivy he had a "sticky dream" about her. When Ivy asked if he meant a wet dream, he replied, "No, that's when you pee yourself, silly!"<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#Threats]]</ref> While he may have the best of intentions, his word choices unwittingly present him in a very bad light. He refuses to use common terms – either medical or slang – for sex organs, instead calling penises "[[duck]]s" and "[[pickle]]s", and vaginas and vulvae "[[china]]" or "tom-tom" out of a childish aversion borne of disgust.

In [[August 2011]], Chris said he is into female domination.<ref>[[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]]</ref> (going as far as to draw Sonichu and Rosechu performing the act in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]).

===Reproductive Biology===
{{Main|Biology#Reproductive biology}}
[[File:Female anatomy according to chris.png|thumb|A moderately detailed portrait of what Chris probably thought females looked like before meeting [[Mia Hamm]].]]

Chris's understanding on reproductive biology had primarily come from what he had seen in porn.

===Books on the Subject===

Chris had obtained a copy of the book [[Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability]], which he had told [[Null]] about on 5 July 2021. As a result of reading this book, Chris came to believe that he could mentor people about dating and sex. Chris had especially shown this in conversations he had with [[the Suitress]], where he attempts to advise her on how to approach a potential lover when she goes off to college.<ref>[[Suitress DMs#Dating Advice]]</ref> Chris had seemed to twist or misunderstand many of the passages found in this book, taking it to be a book on how to perform sex on disabled people, rather than one ''for'' disabled people.

==Moral Basis==

{{Dated}}

===Straightness===

{{main|Chris and sexuality}}

Chris's stance on sexual orientations have always been iffy at best. Prior to his transition to a Tomgirl, he has shown a fear of losing his straightness. This obsessive demand for people to "STAY STRAIGHT" has been one of the first noted and exploited aspects of Chris since his discovery. Many trolls had jokingly declared this as an indicator of him repressing his sexuality in some fashion, only for it to end up being the case in the long run.

===Religion===
[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|thumb|250px|69ing? Intercourse? ''Really''? In a ''children's'' comic? Because they should know all about this stuff.]]
{{quote|You have heard that it was said by them of old time, You shall not commit adultery: but I say to you, that whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.|Matthew 5:27-28}}

Sex was at one point viewed, through Chris's eyes, by the Bible – or rather, by his religion, as Chris's Biblical knowledge is extremely poor. Chris was very strict on keeping to the word of God when male homosexuality is the topic, vehemently stating that he ''hates'' homos, but with no hesitation views lesbian porn and approves of it [[Mass debating|masturbatorily]]<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref>, and as of 2014, seemed to be adopting a more progressive view of even gay men and their rights (albeit begrudgingly). In 2015 Chris made a video lamenting his "past" homophobia and clarifying that he apparently now has great liking and admiration for male homosexuality, [[Retroactive continuity|retconning]] the viscous homophobic tirade of [[Sonichu 10]] into a bizarre zombie apocalypse, implying that he realizes religion is not an excuse for discrimination. Another violation of his Christian morals is the fact that he planned on losing his virginity on the [[Third date|third or fourth date]] with his true sweetheart (read: first girl who will last three dates with Chris). This is, of course, blatant violation of the Christian value of marriage before sex.

The Bible also frowns upon [[Nudes|pornographers]], of which he is very guilty and holds no apparent [[Chris and remorse|remorse]]. These double standards cause many trolls to despise him, seeing as he selectively chooses what to denigrate and what is OK in his own personal dogma, although to be fair, the same is true of many Christians anyway.

Despite people pointing out these contradictions, even quoting passages of the Bible, he will deny it. This is most likely because he goes to [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|a very liberal church]], so any question about premarital sex is probably interpreted quite liberally, and Chris believes that his church and ''only'' his church defines the entirety of religious morality - as it applies to him, anyway. When Chris asks Rocky about passages quoted to him by [[trolls]], she only fuels his à la carte Christianity by saying things like sex before marriage is okay as long as the couple is in love, which contradicts Christian doctrine.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> In summary, Chris picked and chose what parts of Christian doctrine suit his own prejudices, and disregards the ones that would interfere with his [[Love Quest]].

===Sexism===

Chris seems to consider a female sexual partner as a rubber stamp over his (alleged) sexual orientation. Flying in the face of any moral system he's ever held, he announced his desire to upload on the Internet a video of his first full sexual intercourse, even if his hypothetical partner refused to consent to it.<ref>[[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The Introduction Image Space is NOT Ad Space (CCS)]]</ref> After further prodding, he added that he would simply hide the camera, record the event without her consent and blur her face before making the video public.<ref>[[Mailbag 31#In which Chris crosses yet another line]]</ref> In [[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]], Chris indicated that if a woman accused him of being gay in person, he would sexually assault them by demanding they submit to a kiss and allow him to videotape the act, possibly as a way of proving his straightness.

For Chris, as stated above, [[Women's rights|a woman is just a living, sentient sex-toy]], existing only to validate him as a heterosexual. As long as they're straight and younger than him, of course.

==Chris in the act==
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|frame|right|Christian [[For Julie's Eyes Only|professing his love]] for "[[BlueSpike|Julie]]".]]
Leaked tapes of Chris's audio sex with [[Julie]], and the infamous sex tape with Kimmi shed light on Chris as he acts out on his fantasies. In particular, the sex tape shows how Chris assumes ''female'' positions, notably riding on top of Kimmi in a scene straight out of a porno. It seems that Chris's entirety of knowledge about sexual relationships stems from ignoring the [[JERKS|men]] in pornography (due to fear of becoming a [[homo]]).

However, it should be noted that in most of Chris's Rule 34 drawings the characters do tend to assume positions which are fitting for their gender, including Chris.<ref>For examples, see the [[Sonichu 8#The uncensored scenes|uncensored panels]] from Sonichu 8, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]], the [[Giant Penis Comic]] and [[Jackie E-mails 14]].</ref> It might be that Chris adopts female positions not so much due to ignorance regarding sex, but more because of [[Tomgirl pictures|his identification with the opposite gender]].

Chris's view of cunnilingus, put on display in [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]], involves slobbering all over a woman's vagina. Despite all his knowledge of porn, he fails to see how cunnilingus is more than just slobbering, but proper tongue action to stimulate the clitoris.

In the leaked media, Chris displays that he may have some issues with delayed orgasm. This can either be physiological (bent duck, [[Obesity|being overweight]], lack of endurance) or psychological in nature (performance anxiety, high expectations, intrusive homoerotic thoughts, subconscious guilt about sex), or a combination thereof.

In the 2018 [[All Star]] video, Chris is seen tugging his [[duck]] along to the song. He remains flaccid the entire time; his inability to get an erection is possibly a side effect of [[Transgender|HRT]]. If this is true, Chris will certainly not be getting any hanky-panky in the future.

During his time losing his virginity to a [[Mia Hamm| prostitute]] its worth noting that he first received a blowjob, then demanded cowgirl before possible missionary later; [[Obesity| but luckily for her]] he couldn't last very long and finished just after she rid him for a bit; this is important as it points to 2 big problems with Chris; first his lack of self control due to him [[Navy| finishing]] so quickly, second is that he ordered possibly the laziest sex position in the book, with Mia doing pretty much all of the physical exercise with Chris being a lazy fuck.

Chris's second sexual partner in his life was none other than his own [[Barb|mom]], the exact details of the [[Affair with Mother|incestuous affair]] is a bit vague but needless to say every act described by Chris is extremely disturbing and not for the faint of heart.

===Contraceptives===

{{quote|Confidentially, I wear a condom during the second half when I masturbate; I use Trojan or LIfestyles brand (Trojan mostly)

And I used condoms when I fooled with the [[Officer Nasty|L.D.s]] as well.|Chris, [[Jackie E-mails 1]]}}

Condoms, or as Chris has called them "'''raincoats'''", are thin latex coverings worn over a man's penis for the purpose of birth control. However, Chris seemed to understand the condom as more of a symbol for promoting safe premarital sex rather than as a contraceptive. Aside from promoting safe sex and justifying premarital sex, Chris has also drawn his male Sonichu characters with condoms in order to censor their penises. Chris has stated that before his third date with [[Blanca]], he'd wear a condom for the first two times they've had sex, only to have non-protected sex by the third date, showing that he also believed that condoms serve more as some kind of gateway to pregnancy. Chris had a box of chocolate-flavored condoms that he purchased to be prepared for his first time. Chris had given a few different dates for when they expired; some time in 2010 <ref>[[Chris Sex Logs#Condoms]]</ref> and January 2013.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>

Chris reportedly also wore a condom that was flavored like green apple while engaging in sex with Mia Hamm.<ref>[[July 2020 social media posts]]</ref>. Its not entirely clear whether the condom was entirely successful or not due to him mentioning that a "Smidge" of Navy had leaked out after their first round together, meaning he either kept them in his pocket far too long, the condom didn't fit entirely properly around his [[Duck]], he became flaccid way faster than he should have, or he's an idiot who mistook a smear of lube or vaginal discharge for semen; knowing Chris any of these [[Chris and negligence| explanations]] [[Duck| are]] [[Health| equally]] [[Slow in the minds| possible]]. For those wondering however, it's probably safe to assume [[Mia Hamm]] won't be harboring [[Crystal]] any time soon; even by some non-existent chance he managed to get her pregnant, she would have likely been on the pill anyway.

Chris would later reveal to [[Null]] that he was using a condom while having sex with his "over 50 girlfriend", who was later discovered to be [[Barb]]. While ploughing a woman like Barb would cause anyone to instinctively wear the thickest condom available, then get themselves tested a few times over just in case (all of which Chris did); realistically there wasn't much reason to do so since the risk of STD and pregnancy was non-existent since both were [[Health|(at least where STIs were concerned)]] clean and both were completely infertile.

== Sexual Frustration ==

Chris has had a yearning to have a girl to have sex with since the start of his [[Love Quest]] in 2003. The first manifestation of this was when he was clawing at [[meagan]] where his pining for her went ignored or denied as any sane person would.

Throughout the first half of [[2021]], Chris' search for a sweetheart had resumed. Chris has expressed great sexual frustration, yearning for a physical girl to have sex with over his [[polyamorous marriage|ficticious sweethearts]]. According to [[Kyle]], at some point in [[February 2021]] Chris expressed interest in wanting to get a hooker,<ref name=feb21hooker>[[The Place chats (March 2021)#Chris wanted a hooker]]</ref> something which Chris was once not in favor of.

In [[March 2021]], following a masturbation session, Chris had a conversation with the [[Watchmen]], in which he discussed how, despite not disliking or disapproving of the act of masturbation, he felt that he was [[Gender dysphoria|born the wrong gender]].<ref>[[Masturbation discussions#16 March 2021]]</ref> In a [[May 2021]] conversation, he claimed that over the years, he would continually consume pornography and masturbate to get "the hard-on". He expressed how until recently, he felt that he had not fully explored his sexuality, nor any other means to stimulate himself, and even then claims to still overthink the process of [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|inserting a dildo or vibrator up his ass]]. <ref>[[Masturbation discussions#18 May 2021]]</ref>

==Means of Coping with Sexual Frustration==

=== Masturbation and Porn Consumption ===

{{Main|Mass debating}}

Chris has had a history of masturbating, starting when he discovered he could stimulate his penis by rubbing it against a washcloth when he was 15. In 2009, he made use of a washbasin in the kitchen of his house while performing the act, and had claimed in the [[Ivy Q&A]] that he made use of a pillow that he'd fold in half, treating it as a mastrubation tool. Since then, masturbation has been an outlet for Chris's sexual frustration.

In a [[February 2021]] conversion with [[The Watchmen]], Chris said "Masturbation takes Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes, with my body, regardless of whatever method or tool utilized. And it has literally been that long in unenjoyable time since I first rubbed one out while my body was 15. And that was Looooong before I ever started on HRT in 2016. So, not only is masturbation out of the question, it's more misery-inducing."<ref>[[Masturbation discussions#27 February 2021]]</ref>

=== Drawing Porn ===

{{quote|As for the drawing itself, I've realized that it was done not only out of inspired fantasy, angst against E.D., and love for you, but also a major release for my crazy, mixed-up hormones. If I didn't have the foresight to put my pent-up frustrations and feelings in the form of something, I might have become an abusive maniac, so thank god for allowing me to release my bottled up frustrations in a more positive, yet not so "Politically Correct", and not physically hurting others, method.|Chris on how he might have approached Megan had he not drawn [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]<ref>[[Megan Emails, 2008#Chris continues bothering her about ED]]</ref>}}

Chris has on more than one ocassion drawn pornography of his own in order to release sexual tension. Chris claimed to [[Megan Schroeder]] that he had in part created the controversial drawing [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]] because he felt that doing so would inhibit him from sexually advancing on Megan, as he had feelings for her, and would have become an "abusive maniac" had he not created the drawing. The fact that Chris had decided to use what was essentially a product of his own pent-up sexual frustration as a means of attempting to get his Encyclopedia Dramatica page down only seemed to leave a much more bitter taste in Megan's mouth after announcing this.

During the period when Chris became much more sexually frustrated in 2021, he displayed this more openly towards friends, and even on his social media. He sent a picture of his Chris Chan Sonichu persona wearing a [[negligee]] while giving a seductive look to [[The WCT]], and talked to him about how arousing it is to wear one.

=== Sex Toys ===

Chris has made [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|numberable purchases]] for sex toys, porn DVDs and inflatable sex dolls.

=== Relationships with OCs ===

For a time, partly due to influence from the [[Idea Guys]], Chris has temporarily given up on his search for a sweetheart in pursuit for being in relationships with fictional characters instead.

=== Wet Dreams ===

Chris has also had his share of wet [[dreams]], particularly whenever he had held strong feelings for his flavor of the week. The first of these wet dreams was of [[PandaHalo]], where he dreamed about the both of them getting naked, having sex, and then Chris finally climaxing. Chris also had a dream where he was in a labyrinth filled with water, where he met a woman and had sex with her, Chris recreated the dream in a Flipnote animation. The strangest of these was of one where Chris claims that he "almost had sex" with the Sonic character Sally Acorn, which had left him sexually frustrated afterwards. Chris talks about another wet dream he had two months later, this time of the ''Sonic X'' character Chris Thorndyke aged-up and "handsome". Chris also expresses the sexual frustration he felt after waking up from this dream too.<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref>

=== Sex with Mother ===

It had long been joked and speculated by trolls, christorians, and observers alike that Chris has much more intimate feelings with [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] than he let on. These speculations were confirmed in July of 2021 when screenshots were leaked of Chris detailing to Isabella Loretta Janke his incestuous exploits. Null later revealed worrying conversations he had previously with Chris about a new "over 50's" girlfriend he had been using condoms with. We will leave it to you to put 2 and 2 together.

==Sexual Deviance==

Chris's skewed basis of his understanding of sex leads him to exhibiting several instances of sexual deviance.

===Innappropriate Interactions with Women===

To say the least, Chris's social interactions hinder his ability to understand sex etiquette.

===Pedophilia and Age Disparity===
{{main|Pedofork}}
{{Wise|he is a pedophile.}}

Pedophilia has always been a touchy subject in regards to Chris. Chris had at first attempted to deny all claims that he was a pedophile, even creating a new word "pedofork", as a sort of comeback to those who refered to him as such, being created solely to make the word rhyme in "I'm not a pedofork, you dorks". Chris has tried to retain this image by removing any references that may be interpreted as him being a pedophile in his Sonichu comics. Most infamously, Chris had characters in [[Sonichu 8]] make comments about "dumb laws" when [[Zapina Rosechu]], who is 14 years old, asks to participate in stripping for Women's Rights.

At a glance, Chris seems to adhere to the age of consent, once advertising on his [[Attraction Sign|Attraction Signs]] that he would only date someone of legal age. Chris however does not seem to understand or care about how creepy it is for him to be attracted to women that are half his age, and seems to see it as yet another barrier for his Love Quest. Chris has cat-called an artist whom he believed to be "entering young adulthood", has made sexual remarks towards [[Bella]]; despite her having no interest in Chris, and has shown arousal when [[the Suitress]] exposed herself to him.

===Necrophillia===

While Chris himself has never engaged in sex with a dead body, Chris has [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|recently]] been referring to barb as a zombie like husk since even before they began engaging in [[Affair with Mother| their affair]] and that her soul has already moved on to her rosechu form in C-197; complaining that her lifeless body was still clinging to life and preventing him from going back home. Meaning that Chris is at least partially comfortable with the idea of having sex with his dead mother.

In another disturbing instant, Chris recorded [[It's not that cold]] where he proceeds to imitate buffalo bill and pretends to get inside his dead dog [[Patti]], while not engaging in sex with her he does take a bizarre sexual pleasure in wearing her corpse (or at least pretending to since he was too lazy to actually dig her up).

===Bestiality===
{{quote|I can imagine myself doing it with a [[Patti-chan|collie]] at least. you know, like Lassie.|Chris to [[PandaHalo]]<ref name="collie">[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>}}
[[File:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Run, Patti, run!]]
[[File:Super-mode.jpg|thumb|left|90px|Chris, sporting a [[ECV 00002‎|homemade fursuit]].]]

In [[December 2008]], Chris told [[PandaHalo]] he would be willing to have sex with a female dog for her.<ref name="collie" /> However, in his [[Chris-chan Discusses...‎|interview with ScrewAttackEurope]], Chris says he's against bestiality, then hoists himself by his own petard by claiming that Sonichu & co. are not "half-humans" but "all-animals" with human form; so technically this isn't bestiality, as they're animals having sex with each other.

Chris suggested that Brian from ''[[Family Guy]]'' be paired up with "any sexy breed" of dog.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20161007175309/http://archive.sonichu.com:80/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Family_Guy The Family Guy article on CWCipedia]</ref>

In [[The Red-Maned Deer]], Chris recites a poem he wrote about having sex with a deer, but at the end of it states, "This was, in fact, NOT an act of bestiality. For you see, the Red-Maned Deer I have been communicating with and tracking, is really...my lo-my womanly sweetheart, named [[Jacklyn Romy]]."<ref>[[The Red-Maned Deer]]</ref> The fact that the deer is Jackie is obvious, but in spite of this he explicitly stated that it was her at the end.

In a photo of the [[Rental House]] from June 2014, the Chandler minivan bears a bumper sticker reading "I Sleep with Dogs".<ref>[[:File:Chandler Cars 1600w.jpg]]</ref> What exactly this means is yet to be determined.

====Is Chris a furry?====
{{Wise|he is a furry.}}

{{quote|I am half-Sonichu and half-Pokemon, thus making me a "furry".|Chris, May 2018, during the aftermath of the [[Idea Guys]] saga.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20220209025754/https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/997320832040005634</ref>}}

Whether Chris could actually be considered a furry was debated for a long time.<ref>From [[Sarah May Skype Logs#Chris tries to leave|the Sarah May Skype Logs]]: [7:17:25] '''Sarah May''': Did you feel sexually aroused when you drew them? [7:17:34] '''Christopher C.W.C.''': a bit.</ref> There are some things that point in that direction. Chris certainly gets aroused by provocative drawings of anthropomorphic animals (at least when they are [[Sonic]] characters), and he has drawn unsolicited porn of his own Sonic recolors. [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] is in many ways similar to a fursona, and Chris even role-played the character while cybering with [[Julie]].<ref name="Cums cat" /> Finally, in the [[Giant Penis Comic]], Chris and [[Ivy]] both transform into anthropomorphic animals during the act of sex. On the other hand, [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] noted that Chris was prejudiced against a male furry who patronized [[The GAMe PLACe]] because he happened to be [[gay]].<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Racism and homophobia]]</ref> Given the high proportion of gay and bisexual men in the furry fandom, Classic Chris would almost certainly have been uncomfortable at any kind of furry gathering.

In [[May 2018]], under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], Chris declared himself a furry.<ref>[[May_2018_social_media_posts#Michael_Hirtes_BTFO]]</ref> The Idea Guys also [[brainwashed]] him into believing he is in a [[polyamorous marriage]] with his anthropomorphic [[imaginary friends]] [[Magi-Chan]] and [[Cryzel]], and Chris believes he has had sexual relations with these imaginary friends.<ref>[[July 2018 social media posts#BronyCon thoughts]]</ref>

Also of note is that in [[July 2020|mid-2020]], he binge-watched the [[Netflix]] anime ''BNA: Brand New Animal'', commenting it was "very good" but said nothing further than that.<ref>[[July_2020_social_media_posts#Animu]]</ref>

While Chris may loosely qualify as a furry due to his obsession with anthropomorphic [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]] and [[My Little Pony|ponies]], he has never shown an interest in the broader furry community.

===Oedipus Complex===
{{-}}

==Prostitution==
[[Image:Virginbreaker.png|thumb|Chris's leaked [[Facebook]] announcement that he had lost his virginity. Initially igniting a firestorm of controversy, Chris himself let it slip that she was found "somewhere on the backpage" soon after.]]

Given how badly Chris wanted to lose his virginity, many observers have wondered why he didn't immediately spend some of his [[tugboat]] on a prostitute. [[Mumble 4]], from [[February 2009]], answered that question for a while. There, Chris explained that paying for sex would render the act "meaningless," and he was – in a rare display of common sense – afraid of contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

Needs must as the devil drives, though. While being blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of [[2009]], Chris attempted to solicit the services of a Craigslist prostitute to fuck on camera so he could recover his hacked [[PlayStation Network]] accounts. After describing his personal problems to the prostitute, she hung up on him. Chris was apparently trying to get free sex from the hooker with long, rambling stories about his horrible life to try and gain sympathy. He was genuinely shocked when she didn't offer to fuck him out of pity, unaware that prostitutes, by definition, only have sex with men for money.

Previously, in [[March 2009]], [[Bryan Bash]] had sent a trio of prostitutes to [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] so he would no longer be a virgin with rage. [[Hooker incident|Hilarity ensued]].

By the beginning of [[2010]], Chris's views on prostitution had further softened. According to his [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|conversations with Vivian Gee]], around the turn of the year he was attempting to save $100 out of his monthly budget to buy himself a whore for his 28th [[birthday]]. This, presumably, was the "hundred dollars for a damn hooker" he referred to when [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|begging the Wallflower for sex]] on YouTube in [[March 2010]].

Between [[April 2010|April]] and [[July 2010]], under the name of [[Carlos Chantor]], Chris tried to offer himself up as a male escort. He described himself as "[[Chris and reality|Experienced for Her Pleasure]]", with an [[obesity|average]] body type.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref>

Later, under the guise of his troll persona [[JenkinsJinkies]], Chris attempted to acquire the contact details of the hookers Brian Bash had previously hired. While it is possible that Chris merely wished to make his disguise more convincing by implying that 14 year old Jenkins wished to hire prostitutes, it seems far more likely that Chris actually was considering hiring Brian's girls.

In [[April 2012]] a [[Facebook]] status leaked in which Chris announced that he was no longer a virgin. Suspicion arose that this was due to the help of a hooker. Chris provided further evidence suggesting that [[Mia Hamm|the girl]] was a prostitute on 1 [[May 2012|May]] when he wrote in a [[Facebook#Hey, Trollies|Facebook note]] that his virgin breaker can be found "somewhere on the [[Wikipedia:Backpage|backpage]]", a website known for featuring sex service ads.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20210206132219/https://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/19/opinion/kristof-not-quite-a-teen-yet-sold-for-sex.html?_r=1]</ref> On 28/29 June 2014 Chris openly admitted that his first time was with a prostitute, and that he had sex with her twice.<ref>[[Other documents#Chris's wingman]]</ref>

In [[June 2016]], Chris himself made [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|another attempt]] to enter the prostitution business, now as a [[Tomgirl|trans woman]], going by the name "Stephanie Bustcakes". Predictably, Chris was unable to find any "women of any orientation" who were interested in paying him $100 to have sex either "one way or the lesbian way", and the Stephanie Bustcakes persona has not yet reappeared.

[[File:ChrisChanSexForMoney.png|thumb|200px]]
On 24 April 2018, while under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], who had allegedly been extorting him out of thousands of dollars, Chris announced:<ref>[[April 2018 social media posts#Will provide house tour and suck dicks for money]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Anyone living locally to me in Virginia, or visiting in Charlottesville, I’ll give y’all BJs for money too. Serious.}}

A fan on Twitter messaged him about it. In their conversation, Chris said:<ref name=price>[[:File:NAME YOUR PRICE!!.jpeg]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Consider me a beginner with experience blowing [[Cryzel and Magi-Chan|my loving boyfriend]], willing to learn and adapt further. $50 for that BJ from this celeb; if he wants butt sex, that will be $100. Cash only.}}

Chris told [[CWCProtectSquad]] member Tings Tingz that he was indeed serious about prostituting himself, had several offers, but had not taken on any customers. When asked if he would consider, Chris responded, "a little from Column 'A' and the latter from Column 'B'".<ref>[[Tings Tingz DMs#Prostitution post]]</ref>

After the [[Guard Dogs]] rescued Chris from the Idea Guys' influence, he reversed course and disavowed the prostitution messages on 7 May 2018, saying he had been coerced.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20191107173201/https://twitter.com/cwcsonichu/status/993693423084318720</ref> He went further on 25 May, saying he had been forced to write such things, and implied the Idea Guys had been behind it.<ref>[[May 2018 social media posts#Calling out the Idea Guys]]</ref>

According to [[Kyle]], in [[February 2021]], Chris wanted a hooker and asked Kyle to ask [[Null]] to get him one.<ref name=feb21hooker></ref>

==Incest==
{{See also|Affair with Mother}}
{{Split Off}}
{{Quote|I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with [[Barbara Chandler|my mother]].|Chris, 2016}}

[[File:CWCSonichu Rule34.jpeg|thumb|Chris having sex with his "son," Sonichu, in order to fulfill a prophecy to bring Crystal into the world.]]

Chris has long been suspected of having unnatural feelings about [[sex]] and family.

In [[2007]], Chris attempted to shock [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] into submission by posting his own [[Rule 34]] drawings, including one of himself [[Shecameforcwc.jpg|fingerbanging a nude brunette woman]]. ED users immediately concluded this was Crystal, Chris's imaginary twin sister in the comics. This charge infuriated Chris and therefore became the conventional wisdom. By the time Chris successfully convinced anyone that it was really [[Megan Schroeder]] in the drawing, the notion that Chris wants to bang his imaginary twin sister had already stuck.

[[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]], Chris's imaginary twin sister, appeared as a [[:image:153-GirlfriendsGift.jpg|"girlfriend" card]] he made for ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'', and her attractiveness and desirability are brought up several times in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] comics well after being established as Chris's twin. Chris has shown complete ignorance in matters incestuous before; his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] are all related (despite their type and appearance differences, they all come from [[homos|Sonic and the same male Pikachu]] – apart from that fact, they were all created by Chris and acknowledge him as such – Sonichu and Rosechu calling him father), but many of them are paired off with one another (notably Sonichu/Rosechu, Bubbles/Blake, and Magi/Silvana – Simonla was technically made by someone else), banging and some even [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|having]] [[Sandy Rosechu|kids]]. Chris's own comic children are a form of incest – as Chris impregnated himself with his navy. Chris shrugs off [[Autism|all medical/science facts]] and lists the two as perfectly healthy and Autism Free.

Chris first expounded his views on incest to the internet on 31 [[January 2009]] during the [[Mumble 1|first Mumble chat]], when it was revealed that he did not fully understood the meaning of the word "incest". While he showed aversion toward incest in the chat, his condemnation of it was lukewarm, saying that he would only "definitely discourage that" and that lesbian incest is "possibly OK" due to no reproduction being involved. Compare this to his statements about male homosexuality from the same chat ("I hate homo males [...] I'd sooner have a [[Tomgirl Saga|sex change]] before I would ever turn into a homo") or to his statements about male homosexuality from earlier that month, saying that he would make it a crime and force its practitioners into having sex with members of the opposite gender.<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]]</ref>

A year later, Chris's views became staunch. When a correspondent in the [[Mailbag]] pointed out that Chris's state allows cousin marriage but not same-sex marriage, Chris furiously denied it and wrote, "Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN MOTHER OR FATHER!"<ref>[[Common Questions#5 January 2010]]</ref> When another correspondent responded to Chris by saying that he is happily married to his cousin and that their marriage is indeed legal in Virginia, Chris answered him by saying he was destined to hell for his relationship,<ref>[[Mailbag 34#Good luck in hell]]</ref> not realizing that incest is shown in a positive light in [[Chris and religion|the Bible]]. When the subject came up again in the next mailbag, Chris said that sexual relations between cousins are just as wrong as incest between parents and their children or between siblings, and that all those relationships were condemned in the "same part" of the Bible,<ref>[[Mailbag 35#I think he wanted a specific verse]]</ref> which is not actually true.<ref> [https://web.archive.org/web/20051223102404/http://www.cousincouples.com/?page=religion]</ref> In [[February 2010]], Chris notably did not react to [[:File:Fkinglie.png|an extremely NSFW ad of himself]] on the [[CWCipedia]] depicting himself fingering Barb [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|like he did with a former friend in a certain illustration]], despite reacting to [[I am Alive|an ad claiming that he was dead]].

During the [[Idea Guy]] saga, the troll convinced Chris that [[Magi-Chan]] foretold of a prophecy in which [[Crystal]] would be born by Chris mating with Sonichu. He also informed Chris that if this was drawn, he wouldn't have to do it in real life. Chris complied<ref>https://archive.md/AL1PT</ref>. During the nonsensical [[Sonichu 13| issue 13]] of Sonichu incest is unsurprisingly everywhere, from [[Chris Chan Sonichu]] getting married to [[Magichan]] to Chris and Sonichu raping each other.

To the [[Watchmen]], Chris chatted about how he was upset over implications of incest in the ''Sonichu'' family, stating that he had written a piece to dispute the "ugh, Incest bullshit."<ref>[[Chats leaked by MKRs Bloody Chunks#Ugh, Incest]]</ref>

In a Facebook post from [[January 2020]], Chris reiterated his opposition to incest, writing "I, personally, seriously disapprove of incest and would never practice it at all" and "The Bottom Line is: Incest is Never 'Wincest' (Epic UGH!)".<ref>[[January 2020 social media posts#Incest is not wincest]]</ref>

===Dreams of sex with Barb===
On 10 August 2016, Chris posted a [[Facebook statuses|response]] to a mother-son couple who were arrested for incest. He admitted to "[having] dreams of having sex with my mother" but "Never acting on them ever." Among other things, he also implied that incest "offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s)." All this is in stark contrast to his earlier condemnation of incest, which raises the question of whether Chris was being TRUE and HONEST but changed his opinion later thanks to his growing degeneracy, or the likelier possibility it was [[Hypocrisy|all for show]].

{{quotebox|I have a few things to say in response to this article. Firstly, the child was over 18, and surely the mother has talked it out with him beforehand. The child might have had social problems, or a situation where socializing or going out to socialize with other people, was a Greater Difficulty. Financial situation to prevent paying someone else to come over and help out in the situation. Moreover, it was the lifelong affections between parent and child. Also, the mother probably could not bear any ovum for children anymore.
Anyhow, who among Everyone in this world has not had a dream of having sex with one of their parents? Never acting on them ever, I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with my mother.
Although incest is quite controversial topic, but there are circumstances where there would be not so much harm as one may think, feel or believe. The child is over 18; the mother is unable to have any more children at the time; birth control and protection is available and can be used (in a case of father/daughter, birth control Definitely should be used anyhow). Also, consider if the child is adopted; not as much biological.
Plus, this offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s). The schools can only teach from books; not so much practice. And Nobody wants to end up being a 20 or 30-plus year old Virgin. I know; That is a Huge, Enduring Pain.
Unless the sex act was abusive, hurtful, or Would result in an unwanted birth of a physical or mental challenged child, I would not judge or persecute the parent and child. I would encourage the child to socialize more; maybe make it easier for the child to meet more people his/her age.
Do Not send the mother and son to jail!}}

On 13 September 2019, while [[Spirit possession|role-playing]] as Magi-Chan, Chris would describe Barb as a "guilty pleasure waifu."<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Barbara was more of a "guilty pleasure" waifu]]</ref>

===Actual sex with Barb===

While the prospect of Chris having sex with Barb was joked about for many years, most people did not believe Chris would actually go through with it. Before the [[Incest call]] was leaked, there were numerous warning signs of what was to come, mainly being the fact Barb would force Chris to spoon her in bed for many years, and telling Mia Hamm that the sexual massage he gave her was the same that he gave his mother. Their actions around each other have indicated a history of incestuous interest, however many just assumed that this was a combination of Chris's [[autism]] making him act inappropriately and Barb's infamously controlling behaviour.

After the incest calls were leaked it was revealed that Chris had been engaging in regular sex with Barb every 3 nights or so since 27 June 2021. His "seduction" methods included giving her full body massages while making attempts to finger her, kissing her on the lips with Barb refusing to open her mouth and Chris making "Psychic connections" with her before, during and after their romps in the hay.

It's also noteworthy that Chris refers to Barb as "Barbie Chan" almost exclusively now; whether this has something to do with her supposed anime fanfiction characteristics, a bizarre pet name or Chris trying to subconsciously distance himself from their familial bonds is unknown.

==Rape==
{{Protip|It has not been officially proven that Chris has raped his mother, though he also alludes to Barb being "zombie-like" months before he started his affair with her in jail letters.}}

Chris was very apathetic about the idea of consent, and to a larger extent, the act of rape. When [[PandaHalo]] told him she was raped by [[Clyde Cash]], he reacted nonchalantly. He even thought it would be appropriate for Panda to ''move in'' with her rapist ([[Chris and religion|which is technically in-line with certain archaic Christian principles]]), whom he called a "good man" for regretting the rape and for being willing to take care of the ensuing child.<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref> Later on, long after the PandaHalo saga was over, he would wish her and her rapist a happy marriage.<ref>[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)#Sarah Cassandra McKenzie, A.K.A. PandaHalo]]</ref> In [[iPods Down and Listen Up]], he didn't seem to realize that his improvised lyrics detailed a sexual act that would almost certainly be construed by others as rape. Chris eventually compared his ordeals with the trolls, particularly during the [[Christorical eras|Classic Era]] to rape in his Facebook posts. (Since [[BlueSpike]]'s [[Julie Reveals Herself|most infamous incident]] involved an act that could be described as sexual abuse in front of several people, this is admittedly a fitting description.)

As far as ''Chris'' being a potential rapist is concerned, the situation was more complicated. For starters, as explained earlier, he admitted that he drew [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] to prevent himself from acting on his sexual impulses against [[Megan Schroeder]], who had previously scolded him for inappropriately touching her. During a particularly [[IRC (23 July 2009)|disturbing chat]], he ([[:File:BillRiley.jpg|incognito]]) suggested that the trolls try to convince him to rape [[Rocky Shoemaker]]. He also evidently saw no issue with rape by fraud (essentially having sex with someone while tricking them into believing you're somebody else, meaning they didn't consent with you) as seen with his comic book counterpart when he travels forwards in time to have sex with his future wife [[Lovely Weather]] in the guise of being his future self [[Transgender|(whom is definitely a different person in the future)]]. During the [[Kacey Calls]], he attempted unsuccessfully to lure her to his place in the guise of being [[Liquid Chris]], again seeing absolutely nothing wrong with that.

In all likelihood, though, these parts of his behavior are most likely explained by the keys to understanding his behavior overall: his ignorance about the world and his persecution complex causes him to be quite [[naïve]] about how bad rape actually is. With the Rocky situation above, he likely said that as part of an odd, roundabout scheme to get the trolls arrested, but it's still pretty fucked up that he'd even suggest something like this, let alone tell her about it after.

Chris has a surprisingly mature moral opinion on the subject of abortion in cases of rape; in one of the [[Kacey Calls]], he states he believes that abortion in these cases should be the choice of the victim only and that they should not be pressured by others in their decision.

Despite joking about how uncomfortably close he was to his own mother, few actually believed that Chris had it in him to commit an act of rape. For instance, he tried to kiss [[Emily]] and gave up when she said no,<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#A precious farewell (1:29:35–1:31:10)]]</ref> showing that he does understand the importance of consent... Or at least, he ''used'' to. Unfortunately, it seems that as of 2014, he has decided that he won't take "no" for an answer, and basically ''molested'' [[Catherine#The Date|Catherine during their second outing]] by hugging her and burying his head in her breasts even after she flatly told him not to. This gets even more disturbing when you consider [[Catherine E-mails#It IS Your Fault!|this e-mail]], where Chris outright says that he's [[Chris and his Ego|"entitled to a relationship"]]. Also not helping matters was Chris kissing multiple guests who posed with him at the [[TooManyGames]] convention regardless of consent, which ultimately got him kicked out.

Furthermore, it was argued that Chris didn't have a history of violence conducive to attempting sexual assault. Aside from his [[Death threats#Likelihood of Acting Out on Death Threats|habit of dishing out threats he can't possibly carry out]], [[28 October 2011|hitting Michael Snyder with a car]], and [[26 December 2014|macing a manager in the chest]], Chris is physically [[Chris and health|very weak and unfit]], and simply could not overpower an able-bodied person – the only outcome of him attempting it would be a swift knee to the [[duck]] followed by a rousing round of [[Kick the Autistic|America's favorite game]]. However, given Catherine's experience with Chris during their outing (in her words, she was taken by surprise and couldn't react to it), it was encouraged that women should exercise caution around him.

Interestingly, Chris details in [[Announcement 06292016]] that he wants all men to stay an arm's length distance away from him. Along with showing the insecurities he possesses concerning men, Chris seems to think that he is [[Chris and his ego|an attractive enough]] [[Transgender|transwoman]] for [[Jacob Sockness|a man]] to consider raping him.

Questions of whether or not Chris was capable of rape have been discussed previously among observers, but the situation became much more complicated in [[2021]] following Chris's [[Affair with Mother|incest]] with [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]], which has not been proven to be consensual or non-consensual despite circumstantial evidence pointing toward the latter. In light of the information revealed through the [[Incest call]] and other outlets from around the same time, it's unclear whether or not Barb agreed to have sex with her son or if he forced himself onto her, and as such, it is not clear if Chris is actually a rapist. Chris noted that Barb appeared to be "partially confused" during certain sexual encounters, which fueled longtime speculation she could have a degenerative mental disease, which would thus make her unable to consent.

For what it's worth, Chris mentioned that Barb made the first move, which would be consistent with certain inappropriate behavior that she got Chris to do earlier in life (such as asking him to spoon with her). As there is little context as to what happened during the incestuous affair, [[List of Chris's lies|as Chris is known for being an unreliable source of information]], and as Barb has not spoken about the subject, it cannot clearly be confirmed to be rape without a proper criminal investigation. Chris has also not been charged with rape despite spending months in jail, awaiting his trial for the incest charge. With Barb being declared mentally competent enough to live on her own in 14 Branchland Court, it is unlikely that rape charges will be pursued without her testimony, and even then, that would only happen if she decides to throw Chris under the bus. In the event that the affair was consensual, Barb would also most likely want to avoid incriminating herself, as she herself could face a charges if she was a willing participant.

==See also==
* [[Affair with Mother]]
* [[China]]
* [[Chris and his Ego]]
* [[Chris and sexuality]]
* [[Chris Sex Logs]]
* [[Duck]]
* [[Homos]]
* [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases]]
* [[Mass debating]]
* [[Naive]]
* [[Pickle]]
* [[Biology#Reproductive biology|Reproductive Biology]]
* [[Semen]]
* [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]]
* [[Women's rights]]

== References ==
<references/>
{{articleofthenow}}
{{Love quest}}
{{Chris and}}
[[Category:Concepts influenced by Idea Guy]]

Shigeru Miyamoto

2023-08-01T03:24:05Z

Xrcvy: Wrong formatting

{{Troll}}
{{quote|I'm certain Mr. Miyamoto wants to meet up with me and discuss the future of [[Sonichu]] and the Sonichu Alpha Project, as much as I'd be humbled and honored to meet with him and discuss the matter; [[Chris and his Ego|PROBABLY MORE FOR HIM]], becuase I am the Original Creator of Sonichu, [[Rosechu]], the other associated characters and the city of [[CWCville|Cwcville]] around them all.|Chris on Miyamoto}}

{{infobox Person
| title = Shigeru Miyamoto
| image = Shigeru_Miyamoto_cropped.jpg
| imagesize = 250px
|name = Shigeru Miyamoto
|Date of Birth
|day = 16
|month = 11
|year = 1952
|data2 = [[Pre-1980#1950s|16 November 1952]] (age {{age|1952|11|16}})
|gender = Male
|nationality = Japanese
|race = Asian
|occupation = Game designer<br>Game producer
|saga = [[Miyamoto]]}}

'''Shigeru Miyamoto''' (Japanese: 宮本茂)(born: 16 November 1952) Is the creator of some of [[Nintendo]]'s (and gaming's) most legendary video game franchises such as [[Mario_Kart_64_Lego_Raceway|''Mario'']], [[Clawdorf|''Zelda'']] and [[List_of_Chris%27s_games#Nintendo_64|''Star Fox'']], and is a colleague of former Nintendo of America president [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]]. Back in 2009, he engaged in preliminary discussions with [[Chris]] regarding the possibility of making a [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] game for the Nintendo platform. Unfortunately for Chris, these discussions, and the opportunity to develop a Sonichu game franchise with a major gaming label, ultimately fell through.

Eventually, it came to light that "Miyamoto" was none other than [[Clyde Cash]], using the Nintendo designer's likeness as a disguise early on in his trolling career.

__TOC__

{{clear}}

==Early contact==

On 15 [[August 2008]], Chris asked his fanbase to persuade Nintendo and Sega to open discussions with him to create a video game based on his Sonichu character.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 15th, 2008]]</ref> In response, a [[troll]] sent this e-mail to Chris. (The awkward backslashes are a side effect of the software used by the troll to forge the email headers.)

<div style="border:1px dotted #4682B4;padding:5px; background-color:#F0F8FF">
Dear Chris Chandler,<br/>
Good evening. My name is Shigeru Miyamoto. Perhaps you\'ve heard of me. If you haven\'t, then allow me to introduce myself. I am the general manager of Nintendo and creator of Mario, Zelda, and countless other franchises.

I normally do not talk directly to fans in this matter as I am a very busy man. However, over the past few months, I have received countless amounts of emails from your fans stating that you wish for my company and Sega to create a game based on your fan character.

I am sorry to say this but I cannot and will not allow this to happen. There are several problems with your proposal, the first of wich ''[sic]'' is the simple fact that your character is NOT original. You can not make a game by combining two characters from opposing companies and then call it a new game. Things do not work this way.

Second of all, I have read your comics and they would not make a good concept for a game. It seems as though your comics are all about you and your personal problems.

You seem to have created a sort of alternate reality based around you and you only. You must understand one thing if you want to make a game. Video games are a medium where you must think of what other people want. Nobody wants to play a game where it\'s all about you and you only. Nobody wants to play a game about a person\'s inner thoughts and their problems with the world. People have problems of their own. People play games to escape from the problems of the real world, into a reality that they can feel a part of. Your game idea doesn\'t provide that. It only focuses on you and the things that bother you.

Third, I have already spoken with the president of Sega and he even thought that it was proposturous. Not only that, the amount of cooperation it wiould talk to make such a game would never work in reality. Even if we did merge Pikachu and Sonic, who would take the credit for it? Sega would lose the character that basically is their identity and Nintendo would end up with a character that quite frankley just isn\'t an original or new idea.

I\'m sorry but we can\'t do this and we outright refuse to have any part in your game idea proposal. Please stop sending us emails about this as it is simply not possible or probable for us to even entertain such an idea.

Please don\'t take this too hard on yourself. Maybe someday you can come up with an original idea and we can work togehter [sic]. But right now, you don\'t seem to have anything that can work as a video game. I wish you luck in your future endevours and I hope you have a nice day.

Sincerely,
Shigery Miyamoto
General Manager, Nintendo Company Ltd.</div>

Shortly after receiving the above, Chris posted the following entry on his [[Sonichu.net]] blog. Chris's flat out refusal to acknowledge the unpleasant truth proved to be an early example of his delusional thinking.

<div style="border:1px dotted #4682B4;padding:5px; background-color:#F0F8FF">
The Big Brain behind Super Mario, Zelda and other Popular Nintendo characters and games, Shigeru Miyamoto, sent me an e-mail with his response to the Sonichu Game Project. He says Nay, but I bet's he could be holding out on us, or something. So, I say this unto you, my loyal fans, continue with the e-mails and Forum Talks with Nintendo and SEGA of America or Japan. They are missing out on a REAL Profitable thing they can work with me on and cash in handsomely. I sent a detailed reply, but it came back to me in a "Mailer Daemon" message, so I've taken the liberty of printing a copy of the original message, and a copy of my reply that I will send to Nintendo of America for them to transfer to Mr. Miyamoto himself. Give them time and messages.</div>

==Miyamoto emails==
[[Image:Cwcmail.png|thumb||right|Christian discussing his censorship because of Miyamoto's intervention.]]
{{main|Miyamoto emails}}

In January 2009, Chris started to receive a new series of e-mails from Miyamoto that were more receptive to his ideas than previous correspondence had been. Chris quickly overcame his lingering suspicion regarding the authenticity of the previous email encounter, as the new emails informed him that Miyamoto was interested in meeting Chris to talk about creating a Sonichu game after all.

==Trolled==
[[Image:Nintendo's Reponse.png|thumb|Nintendo on Sonichu]]
Eventually, Chris received a [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 10th, 2009|legitimate response from Nintendo]]. Only then did it become clear to Chris that he had, yet again, fallen victim to the [[trolls]]. However, instead of admitting defeat, Chris hailed his discovery a victory.

==References==
<references />

==See also==

*[[Clyde Cash]]
*[[CWC to Mr. Miyamoto]]
*[[The Sonichu Chronicles]]

==External links==
*[[Wikipedia:Shigeru Miyamoto|Wikipedia article on Shigeru Miyamoto]]

{{MiyamotoSaga}}
{{People}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Miyamoto, Shigeru}}
[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Miscreants Members]]
[[Category:Video Games]]
[[Category: Miyamoto Saga]]