CWCki - User contributions [en]

October 2011

2017-01-04T03:46:34Z

Yoshi89`:

[[File:28 Oct 2011 Chris1.png|thumb|300px|Chris is slapped with a felony charge.]]
'''October [[2011]]''' was a mostly quiet month for [[Chris]], who was still mourning his departed [[Bob|father]] and playing the [[PS3]]. Judging from an attempt to sell an old TV on Craigslist, the Chandlers may have been attempting to sell stuff around the house to get some extra cash. The [[Calling Out]] saga from [[August 2011|August]] did not continue.

At the end of the month, things took an extreme and surprising twist, as Chris managed to put himself in very deep trouble with [[Chris and the law|the law]]. As his burning hatred for [[Michael Snyder]] boiled up again, he entered [[The GAMe PLACe]] for a third time since his ban, resulting in several charges.

==Events==

* 1 October - [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]]'s 70th birthday.
* 2 October - In yet another unfortunate involvement with the mainstream media, Chris inadvertently earns himself the "Manboob of the Month Award."
* 18 October - Chris lists an old, mid-range CRT [[Television|television]] on [[Craigslist]] for a ludicrous price of $250 "or better offer." In Chris's own [[Autism|unique words]], the television set "DEFINED SUPER BOWL SUNDAY."
* 27 October - [[Chris and music|MTV]] revives ''[[Beavis and Butt-head]]''.
* 28 October - Chris [[28 October 2011|gets himself arrested]] on two misdemeanor charges (assault and trespassing), and one felony charge (failure to stop at the scene of an accident causing over $1,000 in damage). Barb is arrested for assaulting a [[jerkop|police officer]] and failure to stop, both felonies.
* 29 October - Chris and Barb are bailed out of jail by [[Rocky Shoemaker]].

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

Chris and the law

2017-01-04T03:44:59Z

Yoshi89`: One of the Michael Snyder misdemeanors is actually a felony.

{{DeadLinks}}
{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Image:116-CWCCop.jpg|thumb|Chris always keeps a watchful eye out for criminal scum who would dare steal his already-stolen characters.]]

'''Laws''' are rules established by a society to protect its members and ensure the orderly function of society. Their observance is usually maintained by [[Jerkop|law enforcement]] and penalties are placed on those who disobey the laws.

For [[Chris]], however, these just serve as another deterrent in his endless [[Love Quest|quest]] for [[china]] and a weapon with which to threaten his real and supposed enemies.

As of 2017, Chris has one felony from hitting [[Michael Snyder]] with his car. He also has five misdemeanors - two from the aforementioned Michael Snyder incident, one from macing the [[Yellow-Shirted Foe]] and two from failing to acquire proper tags for his dogs.

==Understanding==
{{quote|I have been giving him reasons since the police came in June of [[2008]], and nothing has sunken into that [[Hello, Juffalo|clown head]] of his.|[[Michael Snyder]]<ref><s>[http://www.youtube.com/all_comments?v=6odVsyr3I40]</s> (the video is fine, but that comment is no longer present as of Jun 2014)</ref>}}

[[Image:Impliedshooting.jpg|thumb|left|Violence is [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|Comic Chris]]'s usual solution to law enforcement.]]

Like his grip on [[Chris and reality|reality]], Chris's understanding of the law is tenuous at best, and dangerously [[naïve]] at worst. Chris legitimately believes trolling is illegal. He regularly threatens internet [[trolls]] with legal action, and makes no distinction in severity between a troll [[Ivy Q&A|threatening violence]] against Chris and a troll uploading a harmless picture of [[Rosechu]] with a [[pickle]] to the Internet. As a matter of fact, Chris himself is prone to making [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|extremely violent threats]], such as [[Sign Destruction Video|threatening to murder]] [[Vivian Gee]] and her entire family because of her creating the [[audiobooks]]. He's done everything from calling the police to convincing his father to write to then-President [[George W. Bush]] in an attempt to get rid of his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page. He has even poorly attempted to impersonate the President in a hilarious attempt to convince the trolls at ED to take down his page,<ref><s>http://encyclopediadramatica.se/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=prev&oldid=1997405266</s> (dead link as of Jun 2014)</ref> and has attempted to contact current President, [[Barack Obama]], to stop people from posting gay ads. Chris also believes that the laws in [[CWCville]] and the laws stated in ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' should be enforced ''in real life.''<ref>[[Mailbag 55#Draconian fun!]]</ref>

Chris himself doesn't have much respect for laws and rules, particularly when [[Chris and hypocrisy|their enforcement inconveniences him]]. During his time at [[Target]], he saw nothing wrong with exploiting the free refill policy and loitering for hours at a time in a privately-owned establishment while harassing female customers and apparently [[Attraction Sign|soliciting hanky-panky]]. Chris often remarks that his [[Virgin with rage|emotional state]] entirely justifies his actions, stating in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]] that he should be excused for disturbing the peace by literally screaming "NOOOOOOO!" loudly in the middle of a crowded mall.<ref>[[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2: Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart"]]</ref>

Self-contradictory as ever, though, Chris's disregard of many laws does not stop him from rigidly observing others, often with completely skewed priority: In [[Sonichu Special 4]], his cartoon avatar makes a point of obeying the speed limit - while on his way to confront [[Liquid Chris]] and assault him with a [[Megatron pistol|deadly weapon]]. In a [[May 2010]] video, Chris states that he believes a man who brutally beat his girlfriend to death with his bare hands deserved twenty years in prison for his crimes, which is just twice the penalty he wants for [[Tobacky|smoking one cigarette]].<ref>[[05142010]]</ref>

In addition, Chris has very little respect for those who enforce the law:

{{quote|Verbal Combat had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “[[Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha]]s.” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off.|Excerpt from Chris's [[CWC's Diary|diary]]}}

The above quote pretty much defines Chris's attitude towards law enforcement officials. He feels that it is completely appropriate to flip off, insult, and [[lie]] to people who are simply doing their jobs. And, of course, as any rational person would understand, running away from law enforcement officials is a seriously bad idea. Chris is truly a rebel without a cause (or effect).

The correspondence with Jackie revealed that in the trial on the Target incident, Chris thought that his work with the [[The GAMe PLACe#Chris the TCG gamer|Pokémon TCG League]] let him off the hook.<ref>[[Jackie e-mails Part 2#Chris lies about The Game Place]]</ref> In reality, the court probably acquitted him either on a technicality or insufficient evidence. Chris probably mentioned the volunteer work because he believed a person's merits, no matter how unrelated, would automatically make one innocent of all charges. It is also telling that he recounted the charge as "Soliciting", whereas the actual charge was "Disorderly Conduct"; he feels that he was only persecuted because of his [[Love Quest]] efforts, and not because he was tard raging.

Of interesting note, is that contrary to Chris's [[Women's rights|general]] [[Homos|political]] [[Niggos|views]], he seems to be in favor - or at least accepting of - gun control legislation.<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref> Whether or not he has a firm understanding of what he's saying, we'll likely never know.

Interestingly, Chris seems to have a ''very'' skewed view of the idea of "self-defense", which is exemplified with the acquisition of pepper spray. Pepper spray, like most defensive weapons, should be used as a last resort, to keep people from attacking you. As seen with the [[26 December 2014|GameStop attacks]], Chris uses it as a means to keep anyone he doesn't like away. Using that event as an example, the man he sprayed wasn't even near him and Chris decided to spray a quick spritz on his chest without any provocation. It got worse when, days later, he began a commotion in a [[Walmart]] using the device. To Chris, it's the ultimate troll and Jerkop deterrent, when in actuality, he's waving around assault charges on a stick.

==Legal troubles==
The following is a list of incident Chris had with the law. This list may not be complete; in a telephone conversation with [[Ivy]] in 2009, [[Bob]] told her that Chris had in the past six or seven incidents with the law,<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#The end]]</ref> and yet this article lists only three incidents that precede 2010.

===2004===
On [[Twin Falling Towers|11 September]] [[2004]], Chris was detained at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]] for loitering, and continually arguing with the staff over a number of months. The incident is depicted in [[Sub-Episode 1]]. Chris was banned from returning to the mall on his own and without his parents' company. However, it appears that this ban was lifted or ignored soon afterward.

===2005===
On 20 July [[2005]], Chris was charged with disorderly conduct<ref name="2005 Disorderly Conduct">[[:File:20050720-GC05009339-00.png|Disorderly conduct charge, 20 July 2005]]</ref> and trespassing<ref name="2005 Trespassing">[[:File:20050720-GC05009340-00.png|Trespassing charge, 20 July 2005]]</ref> at Target, as depicted in [[Sub-Episode 7]] and [[Sub-Episode 8]]. After 2 hearings,<ref name="2005 Disorderly Conduct" /><ref name="2005 Trespassing" /> prosecutors chose to drop the case and Chris was not punished.

5 days later, Chris caused an auto accident when he followed another car too closely and rear-ended it. This went to court on 12 September 2005.<ref name="2005 Following Too Close">[[:File:20050728-GT05011195-00.png|Following too close, 28 July 2005]]</ref> He was fined $30 and had to pay $56 in court costs.

===2010===
Chris's various run-ins at [[The GAMe PLACe]] have resulted in the cops being called on him a couple times. At least once after Chris called in his parents after he was initially banned from the location and tried to weasel his way back in, and again when he trespassed on the property, though he wasn't charged with anything on either occasion.<ref>[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]</ref>

On 4 [[June 2010]], Chris made yet another pilgrimage to The GAMe PLACe. Chris was armed with his camera, and while Mike was concerned that Chris wanted pictures of his daughter for [[Mass debating|disturbing reasons]], Chris maintains that he merely wanted a picture of Mike [[Death threats|for use as]] [[CWC is Angry|a dartboard]]--still disturbing, but in entirely different ways. Chris was caught in the parking lot despite trying to run away, and was questioned by the police, who made him delete the pictures he had taken, and basically told him to quit his shit. Chris made his [[6 June 2010]] video in response to these events.

===2011===
In a [[May 2011]] [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] post, Chris said that he has begun to use the ladies' restroom at his local mall while dressed in drag; he recounts an incident in which ''"a woman complains and tattles on me, and a [[JERK|stereotypical Brute male]] shouts me out. I felt embarassed. [sic] When in skirt, I am still gonna go to the Ladies, because there is no goin' back for me."'' This supposed brute male may or may not have been with mall security.

In his [[Calling Out|3 new videos]] posted after an 8-month-long hiatus from YouTube he tries to do something which some viewers of ''The Chandler Show'' believe to be blackmail. Chris admitted it by typing word ''blackmail'' in tags for last of them; however trolls hoping for a lawsuit [[saga]] shouldn't get their hopes up, because it's unlikely any of the trolls threatened by it would want to report him, given that they've all been trying to get him back onto the internet for months and wouldn't want to drive him off again. Not to mention Chris probably doesn't have anything on them at all. Note that under Virginia law, his demands are more likely to be considered extortion (still a class five felony) rather than blackmail.

In the same video, Chris also point blank accused Mike of molesting his own daughter, all while admitting that he doesn't have any concrete proof of his allegation. Given how prone he is to accusing others of slandering him (like pointing out his bad qualities that are extremely evident to everyone but Chris), Chris's accusations are very hypocritical. If Mike did want to sue Chris in civil court, he would indeed have a case against him as Chris's allegations are textbook defamation. However, it's questionable what Snyder would win in litigation, aside from a [[PlayStation 3]] and numerous children's [[toys]].

On [[28 October 2011]], Chris ended up in the worst possible scenario, netting a felony charge and 2 misdemeanors in what appears to be a ''3rd'' attempt to enter the GAMe PLACe. It appears that the Virginia justice system had finally run out of patience.

As a direct result of his October 28 run in with Michael Snyder, Chris had found both himself and [[Barb|his mother]] on the receiving end of a civil suit. Having been sentenced to community service and put under a probation, and being charged with paying Snyder's medical bills, this may very well have been the first time that he has felt ramifications for his accusations and threats. However, it is much more likely that he simply [[Chris and his Ego|doesn't care]], or still feels as if he were the [[Kick the Autistic|real victim]] in all of this.

===2012===
[[File:Card.PNG|thumb]]

On 4 [[February 2012]], it was revealed on his [[Facebook]] that Chris no longer has respect for ''any'' sort of law enforcement after the events of 28 October 2011, officially deeming everyone who upholds the law a Jerkop. At the same time, he revealed another encounter with the boys in blue that day. As he attempted to pass out fliers while at the mall, encouraging others to stay away from the GAMe PLACe, two Jerkops (or as Chris puts it, "a Jerkop and an accomplice") approached him. Despite the officers simply wanting to talk to him and letting him know he wasn't in any trouble, Chris's paranoia kicked in and he ran. While the story Chris gives seem to hint that the officers just wanted to tell him to knock off the distribution of fliers, Chris believed otherwise, citing that one of them called out his name and making him think they wanted to post another encounter with him on the Internet. He escaped by diving into a Mitsubishi, most likely replacing the dying piece of scrap that is [[Son-Chu]], and driving off.

On the 12th April, Chris [[Virgin with rage#No longer a virgin (No word on the rage)|announced the loss of his virginity]], giving off strong hints that he had slept with a hired prostitute. He all but [[Facebook#Hey.2C_Trollies|confirmed this]] on 1 May, when he said that he 'found her on the backpage', most likely meaning that he found it on the website Backpage.com, a Craiglist clone that also solicits prostitutes--Chris's prostitute was codenamed [[Mia Hamm]], as seen on the website. In the state of Virginia, this constitutes a Class 1 Misdemeanor and is therefore illegal. It is unknown whether or not Chris is aware of this, but it's very likely that if he is, he simply doesn't care.

On 28 [[April 2012]], Chris revealed another incident in the mall. Prior to his Facebook note on 30 [[March 2012]], Chris got into a shouting match with a troll on his cell phone at the mall. The shouting did not go unnoticed, and Chris bolted once security was called in. On 25 April, Chris received a ban from the mall,<ref>[[Facebook#Maniacal Laughter from Who now? Oh, wait, It Is ME! >8D]]</ref> though it is unknown if it was for that incident or an incident that happened between those two dates.

On 10 [[July 2012]], Chris was arraigned in court for the 28 October 2011 incident. After calling Snyder a "thieving liar" in the courtroom, Chris was sentenced to community service and put under a one-year probation. He was also ordered to pay Snyder's medical bills.

===2013===

In September 2013, Chris committed an act of vandalism (an arrestable offense) by defacing a [[HEXbox]] One display at a Walmart, but got off easy by merely just being banned from the store. Given his furious reaction to this and his track record with a certain store owner who also did the same, it remains to be seen if Chris would follow up on his threat to have his revenge. Also, much like his tantrum at the [[Fashion Square Mall]] in 2005, Chris was also confronted by a jerkop at a local restaurant after scratching a woman's car with his, and screaming out loud in public. Chris claimed he was [[Chris and religion|cursing God for all his misfortune recently]].

===2014===

On 29 [[March 2014]], a report surfaced on the [[CWCki Forums]] saying that earlier that month Chris has been spotted trying to steal merchandise from [[Best Buy]]. The next day Chris denied the truthfulness of the report, but [[Kim]] confirmed that the attempted shoplifting had indeed occurred.<ref>[[March 2014 Facebook Posts#Rumour]]</ref>

On [[26 December 2014]], Chris vandalized a Sonic Boom display in GameStop in the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]] and was forced out due to a previous ban, but not before he attacked a staff member with pepper spray who was calling security. By the 28th, he was confirmed to have been jailed.

===2015===
Thoughout most of 2015 Chris behaved himself, presumably because his sojourn to the jailhouse was fresh in his memory. His punishment for the pepper spray incident was eventually decided (after '''seven''' hearings) in October - a very light sentence of a three-figure fine and a six-month prison sentence that he won't have to serve unless he breaks the law again during probation.

===2016===
<center><gallery>
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>

In August, Chris was fined $121 by Greene County for two charges, each misdemeanors, of failing to acquire dog tag and rabies licenses for his dogs.

In November, Chris made several death threats against president-elect [[Pmurt|Trump]]. He is blissfully unaware that threatening the president or president-elect is one of the few restrictions on freedom of speech in America, and could land Chris with a fine and/or up to five years in prison.

==Chris's parents and law==

It's not hard to figure out why Chris thinks the law should serve him and him alone. His parents, too, have the same problem.

* When Chris was thrown out of the [[Wikipedia:Cub Scouting (Boy Scouts of America)|Cub Scouts]] after an [[autism|unknown incident]], his parents attempted to sue the [[Wikipedia:Boy Scouts of America|Boy Scouts of America]] for [[Kick the Autistic|discrimination]].<ref>[[Mailbag 18]]</ref>
* When Chris threw a tantrum that required him to be restrained, Bob attempted to ''sue the school for restraining him''.<ref><s>[http://208.210.219.132/stars/mainmenu.jsp;jsessionid=0000XHMY2MEVFIV0HN4N1CX0EQA:ulnfn1uq], case 0438-94-2</s> (dead link as of Jun 2014)</ref>
* When [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] took a picture of Chris and uploaded it to the Internet, Chris's parents threatened them with legal action (but as usual never followed through).
* When [[Snorlax]] thought she had indigestion, she acted like she was going to sue the Chinese establishment the food came from. When it turned out to be [[Wikipedia:colitis|colitis]], she dropped the subject.
* When Barb and Bob had their absurd case against Greene County used against them, their first reaction was to run to another county.<ref>[[Greene County Conspiracy]]</ref>
* In the 1990s, Barb was given four tickets - one for "Curse and Abuse", one for speeding, one for driving with an expired license plate and one for running a red light.
* When [[Alec]] called the Chandler household posing as [[The GAMe PLACe]] employee Matthew Noble, [[Borb]] claimed that taking pictures of somebody without their knowledge or consent was "not illegal." This came after threatening to sue Mimms and Lucas for doing exactly that.<ref name="Matthew Noble call">[[Matthew Noble call]]</ref>
* During that same call, Bob simply won't have a bar of the concept that an individual can be prohibited from private property, saying, "it's a business place," which has absolutely no bearing on private property laws.<ref name="Matthew Noble call"/>
* On 28 October 2011, Barb was arrested for not only fleeing the scene of an accident, but also felony assault on a police officer, a crime that a remotely sensible person would never commit due to the serious consequences attached to it (mandatory minimum of six months' imprisonment on conviction); however, the recent death of her husband, her age, her bad health and her hopeless, dependent clod of a son seem to have helped earn her some clemency.
*On 10 [[July 2012]], Barb was arraigned in court for her participation in the 28 October 2011 incident. She was sentenced to community service and served a two year probation.

<center><gallery>
File:Barb discover bank result.png|Discover Bank vs Barb
File:Barb vs Capital One Bank result.png|Capital One Bank vs Barb
</gallery></center>

*On 19 [[February 2016]], Barb was sued by Discover Bank for unpaid debt. The judgement stated that the owes $4,706.93 and $56 in court costs.
*On 4 [[August 2016]], Barb was sued by Capital One Bank for the same reason. She owes $15,906.99, plus $56 in court costs.

==Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws==
[[Image:AL cover.gif|thumb|Where Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws come from.]]
Chris believes the police in real life are corrupt, and sees them in the same light as he sees the Jerkops in his comic- the Jerkops act as a stand-in for police who wronged him, and are portrayed as being impostors with no legal authority (probably indicating that Chris does not recognize real policemen as legitimate authority). In light of these things, Chris has his own spin on the law. The penalties for [[Alcohol|drinking]], smoking and internet harassment involve physical violence including a "Kick in the Teeth" which Chris inexplicably portrays as a punch in the first and only of his supposed series of Q&A videos.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008|the only one]]</ref>

On 31 [[December 2009]], Chris orated about a law he wanted made in order to prevent [[Jack Thaddeus]] from using the ad space he paid for:

{{quote|I Have The Instinct, and I Have Already [[CWC-ism|Snail-Mailed]] President Barack Obama on how this sort of bad advertisement is going on and how it is Wrong and should be made Illegal. On HOW if the Main Captain does not WANT or IS OFFENDED with the listed Ads within his own Website or Works, REGARDLESS of who controls the AdSpace, WOULD REMOVE THOSE ADS or face JAILTIME. And the F.B.I. would be FULLY INVOLVED in all this, and THEY have the Power, Tools and Balls to seek, hunt down and bring in the Individual Internet Trolls and Ad-Spammers.|Chris}}

As one can see, Chris is seeking the direct intervention of the president of his country and beseeching him to [[Chris and reality|outlaw advertisements he doesn't like.]] Aside from the fact that Obama himself couldn't have done anything about this, the fact is that Chris was mandated by law to display the ads Jack paid to display. Chris should have written to his congressman about this rather than the president, but either way he would have received no response.

This attitude is also reflected on his relationship with [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. [[2003|More than a decade ago]], she put a stop to Chris [[Love Quest#Conflicts with Mary Lee Walsh|soliciting sex]] on her campus. [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|War ensued]] and Chris received a well-deserved [[Autism papers|time-out]] for [[Chris and anger|his behaviour]]. Six years later, in [[2009]], Chris decided it was time to make peace. He went to her office and left her a [[:File:Apology to Mary Lee.jpg|"Framed Hand-Drawn Apology"]] on her doorstep.<ref>[[One Blessing, and One Curse|out of the blue]]</ref> Her reaction was to file a trespassing notice. Chris disastrously believed that since he didn't read the letter and returned it to sender, he wasn't liable for it.<ref>[[Mailbag 26]]</ref> Thankfully, Chris didn't trespass again.

[[Mailbag 55]] posits a few more original laws: one, that it should be illegal for [[JERKS|men]] to ever show their [[Reldnahc|bare chest]] (because, according to Chris, no one in the entire world ever wants to see a man's bare chest, presumably disregarding [[women]], [[Homos|gay men]] and boxing enthusiasts), and two, he wants to [[Women's rights|force all women]] in any kind of relationship to wear rings (purely for his own benefit of course), thus defeating all symbolism and significance of them.

In the aftermath of distancing himself from the Internet, Chris began to formulate a new law, the "Bill for Anti Online Bad-Mouthing," starting with his second [[Flipnote Hatena|Flipnote]], [[Don'tGetTrolled!]]. The details are unknown, but Chris essentially wants to make so that online, nobody can ever speak negatively of anybody else under threat of prosecution. There do exist laws against cyber-crime and online harassment but these laws vary by country (and concern rather more serious deeds than drawing [[Rosechu]] with a dick), and so even if Chris's law were somehow implemented federally, only his fellow USA residents would actually be held accountable. Chris is failing to comprehend that people besides Americans use the internet, or worse, assuming the entire world can be held to the USA's laws.

==In the comic==
[[File:0862-Cwcville11.JPG|right|thumb|[[CWCville]] used to have a police station, but no more.]]
The law, such as it is, in the comics is a horrifying totalitarianism where anybody anywhere is subject to the whims of a dictator. In CWCville, Chris is "mayor" (read: god-king) and has banned a number of things in his city. Smoking or drinking alcohol would lead one to be either sentenced to ten years in prison or a US$1,500 fine (which Chris [[Chris and Money|considers an equally bad punishment]]. CWCville has its own currency (despite being nothing more than a small city) and why fines are levied in USD is unknown.<ref name="Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008">[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> Importing tobacco or alcohol incurs a greater punishment than murder or rape.<ref name="Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008"/> However, it should be noted that Chris [[Rollin' and Trollin'|repealed the law against alcohol]] in [[June 2009]].

The Rosechus often congregate to "protest" for women's rights. These protests usually involve nudity and/or pornography. They campaign for basic, archaic things like eligibility to vote, suggesting Chris (or one of his predecessors) has imposed discriminating laws against women in CWCville.

It is never clear whether or not CWCville is legally a part of the United States (and thus subject to its federal laws) as Chris characteristically sends mixed messages a lot - some things are distinctly American (the aforementioned USD fines, for instance) but CWCville has its own currency, and its own set of "laws", the likes of which would never be permitted in a developed or even undeveloped country, even if CWCville were some sort of Vatican-like sovereign state. The only arrangement that makes even the slightest amount of sense is that CWCville is just that - a sovereign state, on US soil. Chris doesn't seem to have thought this out though, and evidently believes the mayor of a town is legally entitled to act as an authoritarian dictator.

As a mayor, Chris does nothing bureaucratic, ever, and makes [[Allison Amber|his secretary]] do all the paperwork (as per his thoughts on women) while he goes off on another one of his sweetheart searches. He has mandated "[[dating education|Dating Education]]" classes for students so that they can learn to go on dates, as well as how to "stay straight."

[[List of Sonichu characters#Constables Gerald Grant and Louis Perez|Actual police officers]] did not appear until [[Sonichu 10|quite late]] in the series and even then, they did nothing whatsoever, giving the impression that Chris and his [[Pokémon]] abominations are the only thing standing between peace and violent anarchy. However, [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu #9'']] seems to reveal that there are three sets of "other" protectors: a (possibly) nondescript police force (distinct from [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s [[jerkops]]), as well as his own team of [[Power Rangers]] and a team of [[Transformers]].

{{quote|Is CWCville under Martial Law?|[[Jack Thaddeus]] citing the truth as he sees it}}

In conversation with [[Jack Thaddeus]], Chris revealed that CWCville is the home of a paramilitary force equipped with tanks which he uses as a "Police Force", and all his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] enjoy immunity from prosecution and are above the law.<ref>[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3]]</ref> Add this to the fact that Chris cannot be deposed as mayor ("there [[Chris and English|is]] no elections") and the fact that the police and a fleet of superpowered goons obey literally anything Chris demands of them, and it paints a very frightening picture. According to Chris, [[Magi-Chan]] mentally scans the city perimeters for any sexual acts, and reports any [[homos|homosexual]] activity to the authorities. The participants are then "tried and fined HEAVILY; $500 or 50 Hours of Community Service."<ref>[[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck]]</ref> Apparently in CWCville, the [[Wikipedia:Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Fourth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution]] does not apply in matters of personal sexual choice, and neither does the [[wikipedia:Lawrence v. Texas|U.S. Supreme Court ruling]] finding sodomy laws to be unconstitutional.

Even though Chris's deranged laws exist only within his city-state-country-whatever of CWCville, he exacts his deranged fury unto people whether they're actually in his jurisdiction or not. [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu #10'']] shows four distinct crimes committed outside of CWCville: the destruction of the [[4-cent garbage]] building, the murder of over one hundred alleged "trolls" in said destruction, breaking and entering, and destroying Internet files and property. There was no evidence to suggest that this act of mass murder was even investigated by the authorities, and the comic portrays this act of [[Twin Falling Towers|terrorism]] as Chris and his goons heroically defeating a gang of criminals.

Chris may be able to commit murder without being reprimanded, but of course this doesn't apply to everyone. Following the death of [[Simonla]], the culprits ([[Alec]], [[Mao]], [[Sean]] and [[Evan]]) are subjected to a show trial, and given no defense attorney by the state (violating the [[Wikipedia:Sixth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Sixth Amendment]]) forcing Sean to act as their lawyer despite being [[Tobacky|high as a kite]]. There is no solid evidence presented for the murder charge, aside from the Voltorb remote (which the prosecutor never tried to prove belonged to them) and wholly unreliable "psychic evidence" extracted by Magi-Chan. When they're railroaded and found guilty, they're ''killed by the people they've wronged'' (read: murdered brutally by cartoon characters), in a gross violation of the [[Wikipedia:Eighth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Eighth Amendment]] forbidding cruel and unusual punishment.

Demonstrating Chris's limited understanding of trials (as his knowledge of trials stems purely from television), the kangaroo court integrates both elements of civil and criminal trials. The Asperpedia Four are not only prosecuted for murder by a [[Marvey Blaziken|state attorney]], as per a criminal trial, but also charged with defamation of character, libel, and copyright infringement (as well as several charges such as "profanity to the max" that would hold no water in an actual court) by Chris and his cohorts, as per a civil trial. Surely enough, Chris, Sonichu, and Rosechu are sitting in a bench marked "PLAINTIF" [sic]. That both civil and criminal charges are included in one trial not only demonstrates a poor understanding of the courtroom process, but is further proof that Chris considers "slanderous mockeries" and other torts on par with major crimes such as murder and assault. To add to the equation, one cannot be given a death sentence (or any sentence, for that matter) for being guilty in a civil trial, but in the Asperpedia Four trial civil charges are the primary reason for the death sentence. In summary, the CWCville court system is a constitutional nightmare that violates multiple articles and amendments, and has no concept of due process. One must wonder why it is allowed to exist within the borders of the U.S.

Were it not obvious by now, any semblance of law in CWCville exists solely to further the wishes of its tyrannical (and murderous) mayor.

== References ==
<references />

==See also==
*[[Parody]]
*[[Jerkop]]
*[[Manajerks]]
*[[Chris and copyright]]

{{Chris and}}

Chris and politics

2017-01-04T03:26:07Z

Yoshi89`: /* 2016 Election Results */

{{quote|EID, PMURT, EID|[[Chris]]'s biting political commentary on President-Elect [[Pmurt|Trump]].}}

[[File:Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, a.mp400001.png|thumb|Chris, [[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt|discussing his political opinions]]]]

In recent years, Chris has been quite vocal about his '''political support'''. He was once a moderate, and then shifted left. During the [[Tomgirl Saga]], he shifted further left. His progressing support of LGBT may have been why he has been more vocal about politics.

== Political Views ==
Chris's political views resemble a third grade child's "if I were President" social studies assignment, possessing a shallow understanding of major world issues.

A rather insightful example of his limited understanding of how the world actually works is his video [[A Public Announcement for Congress]], in which Chris explains in detail the actions he would take if elected President of the United States.

One doesn't even need to play the video to know that Chris is full of shit, as the title "A Public Announcement for Congress", contradicts itself. The video is not directed at Congress in any way, but rather is a stump speech directed at the American people. Anyone familiar with Chris's [[Chris and English|unique]] manner of speaking knows that he makes a habit of using fancy-sounding words (to him, at least) to make himself sound more intelligent than he actually is. Since Chris has no idea how to actually these words, the results often make him sound even more like a total moron.

{{Infobox/video
| name = A Public Announcement for Congress
| video = {{#ev:youtube|OhqFeTAHCo8}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Politics|text}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = {{BrickFestShirt|text}}
}}

In the video, Chris displays for all the world to see that he has no idea how anything works.

Chris's first 100 days as President would be as follows:
* Use federal funds to create massive government housing complexes in every major city for the homeless.
* Drastically lower the sales tax of the state of Virginia from 5% to 2.5%
* Not lower "benefits" for retirees.
* Subsidize Pharmaceutical costs for retirees.
* Confiscate all firearms owned by civilians.
* Legalize Gay Marriage in every country in the United Nations
* Construct FBI stations to monitor the activities of internet trolls

Ideologically, Chris's views are all over the place, ranging from conservative views such as slashing tax rates in half to extremely left-wings views such as setting up a massive welfare initiative in the form of "soup hotels".

One point of interest is the fact that the "five percent" tax rate Chris talks about cutting in half refers to Virginia's sales tax rate, and not federal income tax. Besides the fact that sales tax rates are set by states and not the federal government, and a President Chandler would have no power to change this, Chris's misunderstanding of the distinction between income and sales tax points to the fact that, to nobody's surprise, Barb most likely did all of his taxes for him for the entire three months out of his entire life he spent working a job.

Since Chris most likely has never seen a W2 in his entire life, his approval of cutting taxes was most likely the influence of his late father. This is also most certainly the case with the next two points, which both relate to benefits for retired persons.

He would also take away all firearms from the civilian population, a direct violation of the Second Amendment of the United States Constitution. He then immediately backtracks on this idea, instead settling to just confiscate and ban the sale of ammunition. This ammunition would then be redistributed to the population in the event of an attack from 'another nation or planet". Not even considering the fact that such a plan would be a logistical nightmare, Chris seems to forget that the United States already has a military to defend itself, so exactly why Chris believes the U.S. population would have to be engaged in Guerrilla-style warfare against a foreign invader is a mystery.

Chris's final proposal is perhaps the most egregious, suggesting that the resources of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, a federal agency which is, among other things, ''dedicated to stopping foreign and domestic terrorist plots'', should be used to investigate people who type "ur gay" over the internet.

In short, Chris's views on politics are mostly the product of the influences of his conservative parents, combined with a well-meaning, yet naive understanding of complex social and political issues like poverty and gun violence.

==Other Issues==
===Terrorism===

On 15 [[November 2015]], Chris wrote [[Chris's Response to the Terrorism Attacks in Paris|a piece]] on the ISIS attacks in France.

He demonstrated a very simplistic notion of ISIS, comparing it to a cartoon villain “looking to gather energies and power for themselves.”

He also tried to understand the motives of the terrorists by using his own life experiences against trolls, saying “I feel the terrorists, regardless of country, are misguided with paranoia and fear of others.”

His solution for world peace is simply to “stand together, combining our hearts and souls in the efforts to share the lights of friendship and love.” This ignores all underlying motives for sociopolitical tensions, and is a solution more fitting for a fight among small children.

===Patriotism===

In the 2009 [[Father Call]], Matthew called out Chris on his lack of patriotism, for making [[Twin Falling Towers]], saying, “Don't tell me you're an American.” Chris took it literally, responding with “I was born in America, I was raised in America my whole life, I never left the United States of America.”

==Chris's Involvement in the Political Process==

===2008-2012===
Chris, to many people's shock and horror, has voted in multiple United States presidential elections. In 2008, Chris voted for Barack Obama His main reason for doing so was the fact that he had watched a set of documentaries on both Obama and his Republican opponent, John McCain. Chris, in [[True and Honest]] form, said he voted against McCain because he couldn’t identify with him on a personal level. In December 2008, he stated<ref>[[IRC (18 December 2008)]]</ref>:

{{quotebox|I saw more of myself in Obama when I watched his A&E Biography, than in McCain's A&E Biography; both downloaded from the Playstation Store.

Who would you vote for; a war hero that you couldn't feel that much for, or the guy who you feel like is similar to you in social dilemmas?}}
Exactly what qualities of Barrack Obama an obese manchild saw in himself is currently unknown. Chris elaborated further in 2014, during [[Catie Date Conversation Transcript|a date with Catherine]]:

{{quotebox|I kind of felt like um, with my mental stabil-, with my mental problems and whatnot, I felt like I could similarly relate to him? I felt more related, felt more relatable to him in that sense than McCain was. As he was the, uh, prisoner in that other country he insisted, he did not want to be released early. He wanted to go out with the r-, with as s-, at the same time as errybody else. Uh I mean, that is, that is admirable [he pronounces this word all wrong].}}

Chris would go on to vote for Obama a second time in 2012 for, once again, no real reason besides his claim that he personally identified with him, saying, “I felt like I wanted to make sure that I had [[Chris and his Ego|good reason]] to decide from the change and having a first black president. Aside from that, cause if I had done that, if I had done it on just that alone, that would have been racist.”

===2016===
{{see also|Pmurt}}

[[File:Cwc electionday 2016.jpg|thumb|Chris, after casting his vote for Hillary Clinton]]

Despite having four more years of opportunities to actually understand how a country functions, Chris's reasoning for his choice in the 2016 Presidential election remained laughably shallow. Chris repeatedly made clear his preference for Democratic candidate [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary Clinton]] during this election cycle, his main reason being that she is a [[China|woman]]. In February 2016, Chris said, "I feel like American [sic] needs a woman's touch finally after all these years"<ref>[[Update 02/16/2016]]</ref> as a reason for why he wanted Hillary Clinton [[Women's Rights|to become president.]]

Chris did make a ''slight'' attempt to develop his political views from the Obama era, Instead of just voting for Clinton because she reminds him of himself, he read up on the issues. Unfortunately, this consisted of [[Pmurt#Chris's news sources|skimming clickbait articles]] written by LGBT activists. He also [[Honor Roll|cited an episode of The Simpsons]] as one of his major sources for being opposed to Clinton’s opponent, Donald Trump<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote]]</ref>.

When a fan asked him for reasons for vote for Clinton, he responded<ref>[[Misc E-mails#Anti-Pmurt]]</ref>:

*Hillary will Tax the Fat Cats and fill the middle class and lower and get the country less in debt.

*She is PRO-LGBTQ and Immigrants

*She is more beneficial for EVERYONE in General.

*AND, this country is long Overdue for a Woman's touch.

Despite claiming to be a feminist, the sexism in Chris's "woman's touch" remarks seems to elude him.

Chris has also given [[Pmurt#Opposition to Trump|many reasons for opposing Trump]].

===2016 Election Results===

[[File:Feelings of the election results (720p 30fps H264-192kbit AAC).mp400001.png|thumb|Chris, after learning of the election results]]
On 9 [[November 2016]], Chris reacted to news of Donald Trump’s victory over Hillary Clinton [[Pmurt#Death Threats|by throwing a huge temper tantrum]]. During that time, he:

*Asked someone to kill Trump with “a sniper rifle”

*Made videos and Facebook posts depicting the President-elect, and later the Vice President-elect, being murdered in effigy, using Transformers and Legos

*Posted to the comments section of a LGBT Facebook page and asked its readers to pray for Trump’s death

He also signed [[Pmurt#Anti-Trump petitions|an online petition]] asking the Electoral College to disregard the results of the 2016 election and install Clinton into the presidency which did not happen.

Chris has refused to recognize Pmurt as his president, saying, “[[Chris and reality|Trump is Not president, mayor, or Anything in Cwcville.]]<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#I'm done adulting]]</ref>

===Open Letter to Pmurt on the LGBT===
Upon reading that [[Pmurt]] had said he would sign the [[wikipedia:First Amendment Defense Act|First Amendment Defense Act]] if passed by Congress, a bill opposed by liberals due to potentially enabling discrimination against the LGBT, Chris first reacted by [[December 2016 Facebook posts#Advocate or die, Trump!|making a death threat]], then writing [[December 2016 Facebook posts#A puzzler for Trump|an open letter]] directed at Pmurt.

{{quotebox|Hey! #DonaldTrump. I have a puzzler for you.

In the alternate reality/dimension/universe where A, Every person there is the Opposite born gender from here (in an example, the Donald Trump there is a Woman, and Every President of the United States of America there has been Female), and B, the LGBTQ is the Norm and the discrimination happens against the Straight People. Would You, the Donald Trump of This reality/dimension/universe, allow the Donald Trump(ette) in That opposite reality/dimension/universe, Sign the Anti-Straight Law, that would allow discrimination of Yourself, Ever?

If your answer is No, then it should be fit that you Not discriminate against us, the LGBTQ, as the people there Discriminate against the Straight.

Yet, if your answer remains Yes, then you, sir, would end up being a Self-Loathing Person, as you allowed the continuing of Discrimination of Yourself in that reality/dimension/universe that is the Very Same Planet, AND the Very Same United States of America, that You, Yourself, regardless, dare to reside and take office in.

<nowiki>#DonaldTrump</nowiki>, Abdicate the Office and let Hillary Clinton run this country, For the Love of Religion, and for any shred of Self-Love you have for yourself. Or die from yours or someone else's hand.

Good day. }}

Though confusing, Chris's point seems to be that he wants Pmurt to consider the perspective of a LGBT-oriented person before making his decision on the bill. Aside from the death threat at the end, it is a fair effort by Chris, whose own [[autism]] often makes it difficult for himself to empathize with other people.

==See also==
*[[Barack Obama]]
*[[Pmurt]]

==Sources==
<references/>

{{stub}}

{{PoliticalVideos}}
{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Politics]]

Mumble 9

2016-12-09T03:57:36Z

Yoshi89`:

[[File:Clyde and The Miscreants.png|200px|thumb|right|RA RI RU RE RO!]]

'''Mumble 9''' is the 9th of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 23 [[February 2009]].

In this chat, Chris enters a room full of [[Miscreants]]. The trolls, who have been mostly playing along with Chris in the chats so far, suddenly take a much darker turn and gang up on him. They tell Chris that their mission is to stop him from ever getting [[china]] ([[Mia Hamm|which later failed]]), and that they have many operatives including [[Jason Kendrick Howell]]. They also criticize him for multiple things, most notably [[Chris and...|a lot of his faults]]. Chris exits the chat after [[TheCWCvilleLibrary|Arjen Van Dierten]] shouts [[death threats]] and calls him a [[Homos|fag]] in an intentional attempt to get under his skin... which worked.

==Transcript==
===Part 1===
<center>
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Christian Weston Chandler in: Rise of the Miscreants (Part 1 of 2)
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|YiSev0QXgZY}}
| Stardate = 3 [[March 2009]]
| Featuring = [[Chris]], [[Clyde]], [[Miscreants]]
}} </center>

'''Clyde:''' Welcome to the brothers, ''Miscreants!''
 [''Trolls pipe in with "Brother!"'']
 '''Clyde:''' Alright--
 '''Chris:''' First, stop this. Look. I did that vid--look, I did the--first off, I did that video just for [[Julie]]. And [[Max|her brother]] found it on her computer, and uploaded it to the [[YouTube]], without...neither of our consent.
 [''pause'']
 '''Clyde:''' Do you understand what the Miscreants are, that her brother is part of it? He has been a very valuable...member. [''pause''] Do you understand what the Miscreants are, Chris?
 '''Other Troll:''' '''Do you understand why we're here, fool?'''
 '''Chris:''' Let me guess, you're all a bunch of [[troll]]s, aren't you.
 '''Trolls:''' No--
 '''Clyde:''' NO.
 '''Other Troll:''' Y'all isn't intelligent(?), isn't it?
 '''Clyde:''' Look. Ever since [[Evan]] from /v/--well, you don't know what /v/ is, but ever since Evan posted those gay pictures with the "[[masturbating and squirtin']]", we have been there from the beginning.
 '''Chris:''' .....what?
 '''Clyde:''' Don't you remember Evan, the person who sent you gay pictures of [[Sonichu]] and you having [[sex]]?
 '''Chris:''' [''sigh'']
 '''Clyde:''' In [[2007]]?
 '''Troll:''' Don't tell me Chris, the [[stress]] is going to make you leave. I'm sorry, guys, we should stop stressing him,
 '''Clyde:''' SILENCE! [''pause''] Do you remember?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah.
 '''Clyde:''' Do you remember [[Jason]]--always a valuable member, always willing to take the fall for me--c--creating the [[ED]] page, getting their e-mails? He was a good member too. [''pause''] And can't you remember [[Blanca]], the one who destroyed your [[medallion]]? Remember?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah.
 '''Clyde:''' All part of the Miscreants, Chris. And the latest member: [[PandaHalo|Sarah McKenzie]]. Or you know her as "Panda". She's not dead. She's alive, at my side. Panda's sleeping right now, I shouldn't be talking so loud, anyway- yes. I can't believe you fell for her.
 [''pause, some trolls say something incoherent'']
 '''Clyde:''' We've been here from the beginning. Do you know why, Chris?
 [''pause'']
 '''Chris:''' You're trying to make a slander out of me and a fool? Or just pick on me-
 '''Clyde:''' What?
 '''Chris:''' Or just to pick on-
 '''Clyde:''' No, no! The goal is to make sure you never get laid. That is the goal of the Miscreants.
 '''Troll:''' [[Virginia is for Virgins]]!
 '''Other Troll:''' Our goal is that you are a virgin, foreva!
 '''Chris:''' I ask you, why do y'all have to pick on me like this?
 '''Clyde:''' You don't care about women. That is why.
 '''Chris:''' [''talking over Clyde's second sentence''] I do care about women.
 '''Troll:''' And you are a disgusting pig.
 '''Clyde:''' [''at the same time as troll''] Then why are there females in our operation against you?
 '''Chris:''' [''pause; sigh''] I know y'all are doin'--I know y'all are doin' it--or have been doin' this just for the [[Laughs Under Lucricities|laughs]] against me.
 '''Troll:''' LAUGHS?!
 '''Chris:''' But don't y'all have to--
 '''Troll:''' This is far more than laughs, Chris-Chan.
 '''Other Troll:''' This is serious.
 '''Troll:''' [''pause''] You are a foul, stinky pig that must be eradicated from this Earth.
 '''Clyde:''' No, no, he must not be eradicated. He must be made an example of, of a horrible man, destined to never, ever, have a wife, or even girlfriends.
 '''Chris:''' {{RageQuote|SHUT. UP!}} Why do you have to pick on me like this? You don't need to do this! Don't you all have lives of your own? Can't you go find your own sweethearts to do with? I'm not even--
 '''Clyde:''' Why do you think this whole operation matters, Chris? Why do you think a sweetheart will solve everything?
 '''Chris:''' [''sigh'']
 '''Troll:''' We have lots to talk-
 '''Chris:''' Look, I care--
 '''Troll:''' We must protect the women from you.
 '''Chris:''' Look, I care about the women for their own personalities.
 '''Troll:''' No you don't!
 '''Chris:''' Yes I do!
 '''Troll:''' LIES.
 '''Other Troll:''' Bullshit.
 '''Third Troll:''' Lies! You don't resp-[''is cut off'']
 '''Chris:''' Yes, I DO respect respect women.
 [''People talk over each other'']
 '''Chris:''' I CARE ABOUT THEIR PERSONALITIES, you bastards!
 '''Clyde:''' What?
 '''Chris:''' I ca--I care about their personalities. I care about them--about how they feel. I care about--everything about them. They-
 '''Female Troll:''' Chris, you don't respect them. You only respect their [[China|cunts]].
 '''Chris:''' [''pause; sigh''] What?
 '''Troll:''' You gotta respect the ladies, man.
 '''Chris:''' I DO respect the ladies!
 '''Clyde:''' No you don't. Prove it.
 '''Chris:''' Alright, how do ya want me to prove it?
 '''Clyde:''' Exactly, you can't!
 '''Chris:''' I ''can'' prove it, I'm just not sure how- how do you want me to prove that I respect the women that I--like I do?
 '''Troll:''' Because you don't. You don't know how. You [''slams something''] can't.
 '''Chris:''' I can prove it. Now what do you want me to do to prove myself?
 '''Clyde:''' You have to figure that one out on your own. Otherwise, if we tell you, then, we've already given you the answer! Nobody tell him!
 '''Chris:''' [''sigh''] Jesus Christ. [''pause'']
 '''Clyde:''' Julie has ruined this. Why did you have to go for the TRUE and HONEST love--we had [[Sarah May]] distract you from her, but no, she failed. [''pause''] But it's not gonna be a problem soon.
 '''Chris:''' You leave, you leave Julie alone!
 '''Clyde:''' No. [''Troll makes buzzer sound''] I need to protect her, from you. I'd rather have her marry me.
 '''Chris:''' Look, Clyde, we've already--look, Clyde, I was--I listened to you. And I've been thinking about the job situation. I have--
 '''Clyde:''' Look, I don't care about any of that anymore. Ever since you said you hate the Chinese to her, to Julie...
 '''Chris:''' Wait, wait a minute, what?
 '''Troll:''' Chris--
 '''Other Troll:''' I LOVE NIPPON.
 '''Clyde:''' You said it yourself, don't deny it! You hate the Chinese. You said that yourself. You made a mockery--
 '''Chris:''' [''interrupts''] I NEVER SAID THAT! I never said I hated the Chinese!
 '''Troll:''' Yeah, you totally said that, dawg.
 '''Clyde:''' Don't try to lie--
 '''Chris:''' I never said that!
 '''Clyde:''' I heard your computer. I've been listening to you. Don't you dare lie to me!
 '''Chris:''' I don't even remember saying anything like that.
 '''Female Troll''': We all remember.
 '''Indian Troll''': I remember.
 '''Clyde:''' [''unintelligible''] you pig, it was something [''unintelligible''] to Julie, you said something like "Ohhh, me so Chinese" and then Julie said something like "So was that Chinese or Japanese?" and you said "Who cares? They all speak the same!" ''Don't you remember?''
 '''Trolls''': Yes, yeah, yes.
 '''Chris:''' Okay okay, I'm sorry I said that.
 '''Clyde:''' No you aren't!
[''cries of protest from trolls'']
 '''Clyde:''' ...but then you say you hate the Chinese. How is that not racist?
[''more cries'']
 '''Chris:''' But look, look, I respect the Chinese.
[''lots of people talking at once'']
 '''Chris:''' I WAS TRYING TO MAKE JULIE SMILE!
 '''Clyde:''' ...you say that with the Chinese.
 '''Troll''': By being hateful?
 '''Chris:''' I was trying to make Julie smile by making her laugh.
 '''Troll''': Julie is an idiot.
 '''Clyde:''' That is horrible, Chris. This is why you are--this is why no one should ever be with you, ever.
 '''Troll''': DESTINED TO VIRGINTUDE FOREVER!
 '''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] Will you all--will y'all just leave me alone-leave her alone?
 '''Female Troll''': No.
 '''Clyde:''' No. We must convince her that you are the most despicable man. She's a little naïve, but we'll turn her.
 '''Troll''': We do.
 '''Chris:''' Leave her alone!
 '''Clyde:''' We're not leaving her alone. This is for her own good.
 '''Female Troll''': We're trying to help her, Chris, don't you see?
 '''Chris:''' No! [''stress sigh'']
 '''Troll''': Again, be a man and put some fucking bass into your voice, you pig!
 '''Chris:''' What?!
 '''Clyde:''' You sound like a little girl, how is that manly in any way?
 '''Chris:''' Y'all are making me very nervous right now.
 '''Troll''': How are we making you nervous?
 '''Chris:''' Y'all are ticking--y'all are fuckin' and ticking me--y'all are fucking pissing me OFF right now.
 [''troll laughs'']
 '''Clyde:''' Look, it's not you who should be pissed at us, it's we who are pissed at you. You are a despicable human being.
 '''Chris:''' Look, I was-Julie asked me to send her that video, alright?

===Part 2===
<center>
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Christian Weston Chandler in: Rise of the Miscreants (Part 2 of 2)
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|1VaxdAa87Bo}}
| Stardate = 3 [[March 2009]]
| Featuring = [[Chris]], [[Clyde]], [[Miscreants]]
}} </center>

 '''Clyde:''' I don't care about that video, what makes you think I care about that video?
 '''Chris:''' She cared about me and I cared about her very much! I wouldn't have gone to so much trouble to make my family believe that she was real. I wouldn't have gone through so much trouble to find-to try to find [[Molvanîa]] on the map!
 '''Troll''': Who cares?
 '''Clyde:''' That doesn't mean you care about her, you just want her for sex!
 '''Chris:''' NO! I care about Julie for who she is!
 '''Trolls''':[''unintelligible'']
 '''Chris:''' I want Julie for her!
 '''Troll''': Yes, her [[china]]. You sick fucking pig.
 '''Chris:''' ''No'', for her ''personality'' and the way she cares about me very much.
 '''Troll''': What personality? You don't know anything about her personality!
 '''Chris:''' She is a very sweet woman!
 '''Troll''': You haven't even met her in real life.
 '''Chris:''' Maybe not yet, but I'm going-I'm going to.
 '''Clyde:''' It'll be too late.
 '''Chris:''' You leave her alone!
 '''Clyde:''' We're not going to leave her alone until she's safe, with us.
 '''Chris:''' [''stress sigh''] What...?
 '''Clyde:''' What are you going to do, get your [[fanbase]] on us? Your fanbase that doesn't exist?
 '''Troll''': Chris, I have something to tell you. We are the fanbase.
 '''Troll''': Yes, all of them!
 '''Chris:''' [''sigh'']
 '''Trolls''': RA RI RU RE RO!
 '''Clyde:''' RA RI RU RE RO!
 '''Clyde:''' Look, you can make a video on YouTube, trying to out the Miscreants. You can say all that you want about Clyde, how much you hate him, but it's not going to do a thing. But I dare you, do it. Stand up for yourself, stand up for Julie.
 '''Chris:''' Clyde, I'm standing up for myself bruf-by listening to you bastards.
 '''Trolls''': [''laughter'']
 '''Clyde:''' You just listen and take it like the bitch you are. You don't do any action. Never!
 '''Chris:''' I DO ACTION! I done a lot more than any of you-any of you- [''cut off'']
 '''Troll''': Is that right?
 '''Female Troll''': You don't even know.
 '''Chris:''' Why do you all have to mean so much disrespect against me?
 '''Clyde:''' It's not disrespect for you... [''too much talking'']
 '''Chris:''' I am a respectable human being!
 '''Trolls''': No you're not!
 '''Arjen''': You're a fucking scuzzbucket, you stupid fag! What the fuck are you doing here right now Chris, what the hell?
 '''Indian Troll''': Arjen, settle down!
 '''Arjen''': I've been waiting for this for a long time.
 '''Clyde:''' Do you know why we despise you so much? It's because you are a horrible human being whose only goal in life is to have sex.
 '''Chris:''' [''sigh'']
 '''Arjen''': Hang yourself Chris, kill yourself for us!
 '''Trolls''': [''cries of protest'']
 '''Chris:''' I've got my [[Aunt Corrina]]'s death to worry about and her funeral tomorrow [''cut off'']
 '''Trolls''': We don't care!
 '''Chris:''' You just... fuck off!
 '''Female Troll''': He left!
 [''unintelligible, trolls talking over one another'']
 '''Female Troll:''' He left!
 '''Troll:''' Arjen, you're just fucking abusing him.
 '''Trolls:''' [''talking over one another''] Arjen, you just went overboard.
 '''Troll:''' I mean we're basically just taunting him, we're not actually, like [''unintelligible, more talking over one another'']
 '''Trolls:''' Don't worry he'll be back
 '''Trolls:''' [''unintelligible, more talking over one another''] We're the only fans you have.
 '''Clyde:''' Don't worry, Chris will come back when he realizes Julie's in danger.
 '''Troll:''' No he won't.
 '''Trolls:''' Yes, what we should do is have like, quote Julie unquote be like: 'Oh my brother's like with the miscreants and now they're holding me hostage like my brother's
 '''Female Troll:''' [''Over other troll''] Hey, it's push to talk.
 '''Trolls:''' ...Turn me into [''unintelligible; the [[Metal Gear Solid]] "!" sound can be heard in the background.'']
 '''Trolls:''' [''unintelligible, more talking over one another'']
 '''Troll:''' No, no, I mean like have Julie, have Julie send, Julie's brother's with the miscreants, hold Julie hostage, he's like, you know what, I'm sorry to your sister but, I'm going to take you in, I'm going to take you to Clyde. Listen, I have to do this for your sake, I have to take you to Clyde. Put in a few message for Chris.
 [''audio cuts'']
 '''Troll:''' That doesn't sound
 [''audio cuts'']
 '''Troll:''' RA RI RU RE RO!
 '''Trolls:''' [''unintelligible''] We'll see what happens.

{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 9.5|Mumble Chat 9.5]]|}}

==Links==
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBdFhlRzVPZlNFZE0 Download]

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Mumble chats]]

December 2016 Facebook posts

2016-12-08T03:16:14Z

Yoshi89`:

{{Ongoing}}
This page is an archive of Chris' [[Facebook]] posts during [[December 2016]]. Posts are sorted by date and linked to the source material from Facebook. Notable comments will be archived and color-coded for reference; those who consistently respond to Chris' posts, e.g. [[Kenneth Englehardt]] and Jessica Quinn, are colored in red and green respectively, while infrequent responders are colored in orange, yellow or purple.

==[https://www.facebook.com/CwcvilleGuardian/posts/1230704310357379 Patreon reward update]==
1 December at 2:12 pm
{{quotebox|**Patreon Reward Update: In addition to the video and Skype Addition, I've added my Self-Skylander items as rewards. The Higher Donation amounts will get their items autographed. Thank You.}}

==[https://www.facebook.com/lgbtqnation/posts/10154029671016717?comment_id=10154031788821717&comment_tracking=%7B%22tn%22%3A%22R0%22%7D Pmurt should advocate the presidency]==
4 December at 2:24 am
{{quotebox|Trump, impeached, would be a good thing, but Pence should not be President either. I would feel so much better if Trump would advocate the position, and take Pence with him, and let Hillary be President, as it should Very Well Be.}}

==[https://www.facebook.com/LizzyTheLezzy/posts/10154053170986863?comment_id=10154057643601863&comment_tracking=%7B%22tn%22%3A%22R0%22%7D Sense of humor]==
4 December at 2:40 am

{{quotebox|I found 21/33 of them of fair to good humor.}}

==[https://www.facebook.com/CwcvilleGuardian/posts/1239523882808755 Feeling crappy]==
7 December at 5:07 am
{{quotebox|feeling crappy}}

==[https://www.facebook.com/CwcvilleGuardian/posts/1240267116067765 Woman soul, (not) getting a job and Daredevil vs Pinkie Pie]==
7 December at 6:19 pm
{{quotebox|Three things this post.

One: I AM a full-on Woman soul. In Fact, and my real and closer friends can and will tell you the same, I feel better with positive, less confrontational actions, especially pleasant conversations, offering emotional support, and slice-of-life feminine things. I can't help that I grew up with Transformers G1 and beyond in my background, viewing schedule, and lifetime, and developed an interest in the toys and collecting some of them. A lot of women can tell you the same that we all sometimes like a break from the emotional details and view something Fantasy or Violent. And a number of males don't always like violence, either. So, Next time you doubt me being a Lesbian Transwoman, based solely on me playing with Autobots and Decepticons, Think Again, haters. I Love all female bots and cons: Arcees, Windblade, Chromium, Elita-1, Firestar, Airacnid, Aracnia, etcetera. Take your pick of the few.

Two: I Can't get a job, and I have tried, as well as considered a LOT of details. Making beyond the certain amount per month in a job cuts into my SSI. The Trolls and Bullies have Killed my Background with all of the mis-content they have mostly misconstrued for the worst, as well as those that they have tricked, conned, deceived and blackmailed out of me. And I have my mother to worry about and care take; it IS a tiring process on my mind and emotions; Good GOD, my emotions! 😥 Among the other stresses that weigh me down emotionally and mentally, as great and heavy as the planet Pluto, or a LOT of Hippopotamuses, On My Head.

Lastly, On ScrewAttack: Deadpool Vs Pinkie Pie?! WTF?! Are they Actually going to take the creepy pasta into account? >:( Ugh. Pinkie will Lose against Deadpool. That is Sad.

That's all for now.}}

Jackie Mei, 6:39 pm:
{{quoteboxyellow|Have you tried jobs that let you work from home or don't care about your identity? I know there's opportunities for you out there!}}

Chris, 6:42 pm
{{quotebox|I have TOO much on and over my head.}}

==Catch more Pokemon==
7 December at 6:56 pm

Chris posted to a Pokemon group (link redacted).
{{quotebox|We are not even close to the 100 million goal; sync your games and catch more Pokémon.}}

He linked to a [https://3ds-sp.pokemon-gl.com/information/5af4196a-3ff3-4339-99c5-7f8612a7547f Pokemon article].

Chris, 6:57 pm:

[[File:Pokemon 100 million.jpeg|200px]]

==[https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1240399242721219&set=a.278642068896946.64983.100002534669114&type=3 Look at how Tired I am]==
7 December at 8:16 pm
{{quotebox|Seriously: Look at how Tired I am.

Meme-wise: "Look at how Tired I am."

[[File:Chris tired 12-2016.jpeg|200px]]
}}

{{facebook}}

Barbara Chandler

2016-12-02T18:22:04Z

Yoshi89`: /* Physical */

{{DeadLinks}}
{{quote|I am close to my mother, but I would advise some space between you and your mother. And I recommend finding yourself a Girlfriend/Sweetheart to remain with in your later years of life. Mama's not gonna be around forever.|Chris gives advice to a ''Sonichu'' fan.<ref>[[Mailbag 13]]</ref>}}

{{quote|She threatens to kill me in her episode of emotional rage.|Chris on Barb.<ref name="jackie26">[[Jackie E-mails 26]]</ref>}}

{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | Chandler Family
|-
| colspan="2" | [[Image:Barb 2016.JPG|300px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Barbara Chandler
|-
| '''Birth name'''
| Barbara Anne Weston
|-
| '''Nicknames'''
| Snorlax, Barb
|-
| '''D.O.B.'''
| [[Pre-1980#1940s|1 October 1941]] (age {{Age|1941|10|1}})
|-
| '''Gender'''
| Female
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| White
|-
| '''Marriages'''
| [[Ran Coleman Yeatts]] (1961-19??) 
[[Bob|Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.]] (1980-2011)
|-
| '''Children'''
| [[Cole Smithey]]
[[Christian Weston Chandler]]
|-
| '''Occupation'''
| Office worker (retired)
|-
|}

'''Barbara Anne Weston Chandler'''<ref>[[Blanca E-mails#Chris likes Blanca|Email to Blanca]]</ref> (born 1 [[Wikipedia:1941#October|October 1941]]<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html</ref>) is the widow of [[Bob Chandler]] and mother of [[Christian Weston Chandler]] and [[Cole Smithey]]. The sole recognition for her motherly qualities is the Mother of the Year [[2000]] Award Chris created for her.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler#Page 13|A Week With Christian Chandler, page 13]]</ref> She has not won the award since.

==Family and early life==
Barbara is the fifth child (out of eight) of Joseph Otto "Joe" Weston (1896-1955) and Carrie Edna Wynn (1911-1967). They married in 1926, when Carrie was either 14 or 15 years old and Joseph [[Pedofork|was around 30]].<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d141.html#P141</ref> Barb's maternal grandfather was an alcoholic moonshiner, who carried out affairs and failed to provide even the most basic support for her mother's family.<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d118.html#P141</ref>

Chris stated in a leaked video that he and his mother are not liked by the members of the Weston family who have outlived [[Aunt Corrina]].<ref>[[Message for John Kyle]]</ref> It is not clear whether Chris meant to say that after Corrina's death all the Westons started hating him and his mother, or alternatively that by the time of Corrina's death no Weston other than her had a cordial relationship with Chris and Barb. Regardless of how this statement should be interpreted, it appears that Barbara's relationship with rest of her extended family is strained.

According to [[Facebook statuses|Facebook status]] Chris wrote on 30 [[January 2012]], Barbara lost her virginity at some point during her high school years.

Barb grew up in Red Oak, Virginia, and graduated from Randolph-Henry High School in Charlotte Court House, Virginia in 1960. While there, she was treasurer of her school's chapter of the Future Homemakers of America, a member of the Randolph-Henry bus patrol, a typist for her school yearbook The Log, and a member of the Spanish Club. She was also a member of many other school organizations, suggesting that she was very involved in extracurricular activities while in high school. She was also known for her perfect attendance record from her sophomore through her senior years of high school.

According to her senior yearbook, her nickname in high school was Bobcat, possibly due to her figure.

===Cole and his various fathers===
[[Image:0467-CWC18th20.jpg|thumb|Cole visits for Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]]

Barbara grew up and raised Chris's older half-brother [[Cole Smithey|Cole]] in Richmond, Virginia, near Virginia Commonwealth University and West Avenue.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref>

Barbara gave birth to Cole in 1963. Throughout his life, Barbara has lied to Cole about who his father is because she's [[Wikipedia:Maury Povich|Maury Povich]] trash.

Based on the experiences with his various stepfathers, Cole thinks that Barbara has a "proclivity to isolate herself via scurrilous mates."<ref name="coleemail2">[[:File:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 2]]</ref> The use of "scurrilous" in this statement makes no sense, suggesting Cole tries to use big words to impress people - [[Laughs Under Lucricities|a family trait]], perhaps.

====Jack Dale Smithey====
Barb insists that Cole's father is Jack Dale Smithey, to whom she claimed she was married, but records show she actually wasn't.<ref name="coleemail2" />

In 1995, Cole's friend syndicated cartoonist [[Wikipedia:Ted_Rall|Ted Rall]] made an Internet post questioning the whereabouts of Jack Dale Smithey. According to the post, Smithey lived in Richmond in 1963 (the time Cole was born), and was a Merchant Marine. He later worked as a trucker for Pilot Trucking in North Carolina, but had not been heard of since 1964.<ref>http://archiver.rootsweb.ancestry.com/th/read/SURNAMES/1995-04/0798938259</ref>

Cole eventually hired a private detective who tracked down Jack Smithey in Sarasota, Florida.<ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails">[[Cole Smithey E-mails]]</ref>

====Ran Coleman Yeatts====
[[Image:RanColemanYeatts-WakeForestHowler1961.png|thumb|Cole's [[TRUE and HONEST]] biological father, Ran Coleman Yeatts, from the 1961 Wake Forest yearbook.]]

Records, which Cole later found after making a trip back to Richmond, show Barb married one Ran ''Cole''man Yeatts in 1961. Yeatts was from South Hill, Virginia, and was enrolled at Wake Forest College as late as 1960. He was scheduled to graduate in 1961, the year he and Barb married.<ref>http://www.archive.org/stream/howler1960wake/howler1960wake_djvu.txt</ref>

To further fuel Cole's rage, Yeatts would visit him and was introduced as a "friend" of the family when he was a child. <ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails" /> After Cole hired a private detective, Barbara hung up the phone on him when he called to ask about his father.<ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails" />

Yeatts died on 6 June 2007 in South Hill. His obituary made no mention of Cole and, curiously, none of Barbara either.<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20130211071320/http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/timesdispatch/obituary.aspx?n=Ran-Yeatts&pid=88787372</ref>

====Jerry Harmon====
Jerry Harmon is Barbara's former lover and alleged sinister step-father of [[Cole Smithey]], Chris's older half-brother. Barbara claims to have married Jerry after her relationships with Jack Dale Smithey and Ran Coleman Yeatts. However, in the course of Cole's investigation into his family history, he was unable to find a marriage certificate.<ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails" />

{{quote|I grew up in an abusive household with Barbara and my former stepfather Jerry, where physical and mental punishments ran the gambit from bare-assed beatings to cold showers to bizarre scenarios acted out with glee by two deeply neurotic adults... Even at a very young age, I knew that they would abandon me. They were both irresponsible and incompetent parents who exposed me to traumas that I would rather not remember.|Cole on Barb and Jerry's parenting skills.<ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails" />}}
{{-}}

In his article [[Saturday Night Special]], Cole would further elaborate about his first step-father. According to Cole, Jerry was a professional magician who lived with Barbara in a second-floor apartment adjacent to the campus of Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond. Jerry allegedly kept a gun in his nightstand drawer, which his stepson would play with, and was out cheating on his wife when an intruder came to the apartment, leaving Barb to have to fire the gun to scare them off. The shot ricocheted and nearly killed Cole as a result, hitting the wall a hair's breadth behind his head.

===Marriage with Bob===
[[Image:0033-MommasBirthday.jpg|thumb|She never was much of a looker.]]

Bob and Barbara met in a bar on a karaoke night. Barbara was there with friends and Bob was singing.<ref name="Mumble 3.5">[[Mumble 3.5]]</ref> Cole's friend Chuck, who worked at the bar, has a vivid memory of them being drunk retards.<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-1.PNG|24 July 2007 email #1 from Cole to Chris]]</ref> According to Chris, Barbara did the [[How to Talk to Girls|pursuing]]: "She chased him down the hall." They got married in 1980.<ref name="Mumble 3.5" />

According to Chris, Barbara had not had sex with Bob for at least two decades before his death. They had been sleeping in separate rooms for the past few years.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>

On September 1992, Chris and Bob moved from Ruckserville to Chesterfield County.<ref>[[Chris's Wikipedia profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref> Barbara did not accompany them, but rather stayed in in their old home. Chris claimed that the separation allowed Barbara to continue working at her job with Virginia Power until retirement, and that she still visited Bob and Chris on every weekend during the time she lived separately from them. After going into retirement when Chris was in the eighth grade (in early 1996), Barbara came to live with her husband and son in Chesterfield.<ref>[[Mailbag 32#Chris is no stranger to stupid name changes]]</ref><ref>[[:Image:0078-CWCNote2.jpg]]</ref>

With both Barbara and Bob retired, they resided with Chris in their Ruckersville home. It is difficult to ascertain what their relationship was like, but sources such as the tour of the house would suggest that Chris's parents neglected the family home and spent most of their time apart in separate areas of the house.

Barbara became a widow on 6 September 2011 when Bob died.<ref name="BobObit">http://web.archive.org/web/20130211071324/http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600</ref>
{{-}}
<center>
<gallery>
File:Parenting Interview 001.jpg|Barb and Bob's answers on a parenting quiz
File:Parenting Interview 002.jpg|Barb and Bob's answers on a parenting quiz
</gallery>
</center>

===Pampering of Chris===

{{quote|Yeah, but then my Mom is pretty much jealous of me loving another woman more than her.|Chris, describing his [[Wikipedia:Oedipus complex|Oedipus complex]].<ref>[[Mumble 10]]</ref>}}

[[Image:0028-ChristopherWMom1.jpg|thumb|Barbara evolved into Snorlax as she raised Chris.]]
[[Image:ImWorkingOnIt.png|thumb|left|Chris and Barbara in an intimate moment.]]

According to Cole, Bob and Barbara left Chris alone every day for years with the [[abusive babysitter]] while going out drinking, effectively ignoring the onset of the earliest symptoms of autism.<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 3]]</ref> After Chris's initial diagnosis, and after their negligence was inevitably thrown back in their face, Barbara resorted to any means necessary to coax Chris into talking, most notoriously by bribing him with toys.<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref>

While both Chris's parents are largely responsible for Chris's current state, Barb has more often than not been the most active in protecting Chris from recognizing any failure or shortcoming on his part, doing everything from being his sole commission with [[Cutco]] to going as his date to his [[Manchester High School#The Senior Prom|seinor [sic] prom]].

This pattern of accountability continues even into Chris's adult years. On at least two occasions, most notably after he was banned for good, Barbara visited [[the GAMe PLACe]] attempting to protect and defend her little snowflake and argue his case with [[Michael Snyder]], but to no avail.

As first evidenced by the "GAMe PLACe/4Chan picture" incident, she is extremely paranoid regarding Chris's online misadventures, likely because she fears that he'll [[Jerkhief|get]] [[Bagget|arrested]] and [[28 October 2011|go to prison]]. Given some of the violent states of some of his videos and Chris's [[Arrest|track record]], she's probably not too far from the truth. She may also suspect that Chris is a [[pedofork|pedophile]], as she [[Mumble 10| thought it was possible that he may have fallen for a ''To Catch A Predator''-esque sting operation]] during the [[Julie]] fiasco. She even seems to suspect that [[Megan Schroeder]], one of the few women Chris has known who ''wasn't'' out to troll him, is partially responsible for the persecution he has endured over the years. She does her part to keep his activities under control by acting as Chris's personal concierge, as seen when she interrogated [[Ivy]] for about half an hour before letting her speak to Chris.<ref name="IvyQ&A">[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref>

Barbara constantly babies Chris and tells him how handsome he is.<ref>[[Sonichu Girls]] and [[White knight emails]]</ref> She also told Chris that the reason he often "blanks out" or gets confused isn't that he's a lazy dumbass, but that he's a "[[Chris and art|creative genius]] and is simply overwhelmed by having so many creative ideas".<ref>[[Kacey Call 12]]</ref>

However, it seems that even Barb has her limits. Like Bob, she was [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Coming out to my parents|ashamed of Chris's effeminate escapades]], claiming that she didn't raise a daughter, and that "tomgirl" is not a thing. [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Mothers|She tried and failed]] to get Chris to stop wearing a bra and panties, even offering to pay him to stop.

It appears that Chris's diet doesn't worry Barb too much. In the night after the Chandler family moved back to Ruckersville, Bob and Chris refused a spaghetti dinner offered by Barb. As a response, Barb decided to forego cooking for her family and hasn't made a meal for Chris since then. <ref>See emails sent by [[Jackie E-mails 24|Chris to Jackie on 24 and 26 April 2011]].</ref>

To cap off their relationship, Chris allegedly revealed in private conversations that Barbara has occasionally spooned with him.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxGU4nSlX0M ''PVCC NEW info: on Chris and Barbara spoon eachother!'' (YouTube)]</ref>

==Health problems==
===Physical===
[[Image:Cheers01.jpg|thumb|Artist's depiction.]]
[[File:Barb.PNG|thumb|left|''Arrangement in Pink and Purple: The Autist's Mother'']]

Like Chris, Barbara has been [[obesity|obese]]. As little as ten years ago Barbara was reasonably slim, but, along with Chris, ballooned out in more recent years, to the point of resembling an American [[Wikipedia:Rose West|Rose West]]. Her massive size earned her the affectionate nickname '''Snorlax''' from the [[trolls]]. Barb's size may have led to her [[stress|sleeping a lot]]<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7]]</ref> and usually skipping [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]].<ref>[[Church audio]]</ref>

In [[October 2009]], Barbara spent her birthday at the hospital with what the Chandlers thought was food poisoning.<ref name="9 October 2009">[[9 October 2009]]</ref> Barbara was diagnosed with [[Wikipedia:Colitis|colitis]], a gastrointestinal disease characterized by the inflammation of the colon. It manifests in diarrhea and cramps. Which kind of colitis has yet to be determined. It seems the Chandler family's diet has finally come to affect her, and in order to survive she will have to change her eating habits; considering their stubbornness, this clearly will end badly.

Hearing the plight of the Chandler family, [[Trolls|fans]] of Sonichu have created the website "Barbara Chandler Has AIDS" to spread awareness regarding AIDS and to collect donations for research foundations and charities.<ref>[http://sites.google.com/site/barbarachandlerhasaids/home "Barbara Chandler Has AIDS" Awareness Website]</ref> Chris himself denied his mom has AIDS.<ref name="9 October 2009"/>

According to eyewitness reports, Barbara lost weight in 2012.<ref>[[This is how the Trial went‎]]</ref> Her weight loss is visible in photos Chris took of her at a 2012 Mythbusters tour stop in Washington, DC.<ref>[[:File:BarbMarch2012.png]]</ref>

In a [[Twitter|tweet]] to Cole from June 29, 2013, Chris tells him that "[he] ought to be over here putting bandages on [their] Mom's holey buttocks." It was not clear exactly what sort of problem this referred to, though it didn't sound pleasant. On October 14, 2013, Chris elaborated in a Facebook post, stating, "my mother stresses me with her continuous rants about her damn miniature scabie flies, her suffering, the low finances and shit!!!" Consensus was that the so called "holey buttocks" were in fact lesions. It is now believed that Barb currently has a colony of parasitic mites (rather than flies) that have burrowed into her bountiful booty. Naturally, while Barb is being eaten alive, Chris whines about having to take care of her.

On 23 August 2013 Chris revealed that Barbara had been afflicted with breast cancer but managed to survive.<ref>[[Facebook#Breast Cancer Awareness]]</ref> He did not give details about when was she diagnosed with the ailment, at what stage it was and what kind of treatment was Barb given.

More recently, Chris has been talking less and less about his surviving parent, so information about how she's doing is scarce. However, what little information we do have suggests that she isn't doing so well. In August 2014, Chris begged for money on [[Facebook]], [[Lego|supposedly]] to pay dental fees, as he claimed his mother had cavities in her teeth which needed treatment. On the occasion that she attended Chris's [[26 December 2014|court hearings]] throughout [[2015]], Christorians in attendance invariably noted that although she has lost weight, she appears to have low muscle mass (probably due to her sedentary lifestyle). In particular, at [[26 December 2014#15 October Hearing|his last hearing]], it was noted that Barb appeared to be growing increasingly frail and possibly senile, as she did not appear to be very responsive, and appeared much more submissive to Chris than she has otherwise been known to be. Chris also reportedly got short with her due to her poor hearing.

In November 2015, [[Family Needs to appreciate Family]] was uploaded to YouTube. The video is a plea for [[Cole Smithey]], [[David Alan Chandler]], and [[Carol Suzanne Chandler]] to visit Barb before "Her time runs out", even though the latter two aren't Barb's children.

In June 2016, Barb appeared in [[Donations Requested, Please.|two]] [[Donations Required, Serious Please help‎|videos]] as Chris asks for donations to buy asthma medication for her; here, Barb appears with wrinkled skin and scant hair, and apparently cannot speak, further indicating her alarming physical decline.

In August 2016, [[Anna McLerran]] posted a photo on [[Facebook]] of herself and Barb together. In it, Barb appears to have aged significantly since her last appearance in the "Donations Further Requested, Please" video.

In November 2016, Barb escaped injury when she slipped and fell on [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's hoard]].

===Mental===
During the [[Ivy]] Saga, Barb threatened to her family that she might commit suicide, as a response to the stress she was going through.<ref name="IvyQ&A"/> To this day, it remains unclear whether she was actually suicidal, or idly threatening suicide for her own gain.

Barb is understood by most to be a highly unstable woman, and worryingly, many of her behaviors can also be observed in Chris. Many believe her to be a narcissist, on account of her seemingly baseless belief that she is [[Daniel Weston|descended from]] [[Anne Boleyn|Tudor high nobility]], and the pathological manner in which she lies and assigns blame to others, even in instances when any sane person could see that only they were in the wrong. All of these traits are shared by Chris, with Barb's apparent encouragement. Additionally, many aspects of her relationship with Chris are consistent with [http://www.daughtersofnarcissisticmothers.com/mothers-with-narcissistic-personality-disorder/ narcissistic motherhood], which is a fascinating but complex topic too lengthy to be discussed in detail here. Although Chris seems to be her [http://www.daughtersofnarcissisticmothers.com/golden-child-and-scapegoat/ "golden child"], she does not shy from mistreating him if he displeases her. This can be seen in an email to [[Jackie]] from May 2011; Chris claimed that his mother flew into a rage over his [[Tomgirl]] inclinations, forcing him to submit to a haircut and [[Death threats|threatening to kill him]].<ref name="jackie26" />

Aside from her narcissism, Barb is also noted by Christorians for her hoarding. Chris labels Barb a "pack rat"<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref>, and on more than one occasion has indicated his displeasure at her hoarding and the state it has left [[14 Branchland Court|their house]] in, although neither he nor Bob are known to have ever seriously challenged it. Barb compulsively hoards her purchases, particularly from Goodwill, which, by [[2009]], had rendered the living room uninhabitable.<ref>[[Tour of Chris's House]]</ref> When Bob was admitted to the hospital for the final time, he was quarantined for bug bites, ostensibly due to the conditions in the Chandler household. <ref>[[Rocky Shoemaker call]]</ref> The situation did not improve after Bob's passing, either. A [[Tour of Chris's House II|second house tour video]] made by Chris in [[2013]] revealed that Barb's hoarding had gotten severe enough to render entire rooms literally inaccessible, with some rooms literally full of stuff to within inches of the ceiling, and others reduced to crevices carved into walls of junk.

Barb's hoarding was predicted by many to lead to disaster, and finally did on [[January 2014|January 10 2014]], when in the wee hours of the morning, Chris [[Destruction Of Chris's House|started a house fire]] while trying to brew coffee in the bathroom, because the kitchen had been among the rooms blocked off by Barb's junk. Naturally, Barb's hoard provided ample kindling for the fire, and the house was severely damaged before the fire could be contained. In fact, given the state of the house in the second tour video, it's surprising that Chris and Barb were able to escape. Equally unsurprising, however, is the fact that one of the Chandlers' remaining cats died in the blaze, and one of the fire-fighters sent to the scene also suffered unspecified injuries.

While the Chandlers [[Rental House|relocated]], pending repairs to their home, Barb's stuff went into storage. When repairs were completed a year later, Barb had all of it moved back to 14 Branchland Court, and is not known to have disposed of any of it, even though, by all accounts, most of what she and Chris were able to salvage is either fire, smoke or water damaged, rendering it completely useless.

On [[July 2016|July 13 2016]], Barb unexpectedly starred in [[Donations Further Requested, Please|one of Chris's e-begging videos]]. In the minute-long video, she speaks slowly and almost inaudibly, hardly moving or blinking for the entirety of the video. While some have voiced concerns that this may be an early sign of dementia, it is just as likely that Barb, being Barb, was putting on an act for money.

==Legal problems==
On [[28 October 2011]], Chris and Barb were caught in an incident with [[The GAMe PLACe]], and were actually arrested with several serious charges, with Barb's including felony assault and failure to stop. The two were later released on bail. After a succession of court hearings, Barb, along with her son, was arraigned on her felony charges on 10 July 2012. She was sentenced to community service and was put under a two-year probation, as well as being ordered to pay Michael Snyder's medical bills. When informed of the latter fact during the trial, Chris explained that his mother, a retired, obese, seventy-year-old woman, would take care of the charges for him. No one was particularly surprised at this revelation.

Five years later, Barb was sued by a Discover bank in Norfolk for not paying debts. This came to light on [[March 2016|March 14]] [[2016]] when sharp eyed [[Kiwi Farms|Kiwis]] noticed that she had a hearing on March 16. As she must have been outright ignoring her debt for some time for the bank to take her to court over it, it was widely assumed that she would ignore the summons too. Instead, once the court records were updated, many were surprised to see that not only had Barb attended, but she had represented herself, too. Equally unsurprisingly, this bold move failed to pay off, and Barb was still sentenced to pay $4,706.93<ref>File:Barb discover bank result.png</ref>.

Five months later, Barb was sued again, this time by Capital One Bank, for the same reason. The hearing in September resulted in a Default Judgement against Barb, meaning that she didn't bother attending. She owes Capital One $15,906.99<ref>File:Barb vs Capital One Bank result.png</ref>.

==Appearances==
[[File:Bc.PNG|thumb|300px|Chris gets to live out his fantasy of being (and having) an adequate son.]]
[[File:Barb drawing Nov. '15.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Barb in a drawing released in [[November 2015]].]]
===In ''Sonichu''===
In [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]], Barbara makes a brief appearance in "Classic Sonichu Strips".

In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], the male [[Dating education#In Sonichu|Dating Education]] students are given Barbara dolls to talk to.

According to the [[CWCipedia]], [[Sandy Rosechu]] and [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children]] go to Anneweston Elementary School.<ref>[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Wild_Sonichu Wild Sonichu]</ref> It is unknown whether or not Sonichu and Rosechu's children still go that school after their [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children#Sonichu and Rosechu's children|evolution]].

===Audio===
* Private Skype chat with [[Sarah May]].
* 4 [[February 2009]], [[Mumble 2]]: Barbara denies singing while vacuuming Chris's [[room]].
* 17 [[February 2009]], [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 2]]: Barbara talks to Chris but when Julie wants to talk to her, Barbara says she isn't "able to talk to anybody right now."
* [[March 2009]]: Barbara takes over the phone from Chris when Clyde [[Clyde#Prostitutes|calls after the date with Emily]].
* [[Kacey Call 15]]: Chris keeps [[Kacey]] on the phone for nearly fourteen minutes while Barb talks about the value of [[Chris and his Ego|humility]], her poor health, and her relationship with Bob, among other things.
* [[November 2009]], [[Kacey and Liquid Call]]: Barbara tells Chris to "just hang up on the bitch!"
* 10 [[August 2010]], [[Matthew Noble call]]: Barbara claims that Megan "lied" to Chris and abruptly hangs up mid-sentence. Throughout the call, she can be heard denying that she and Bob are the slightest bit in the wrong. At one point she complains about the time Michael Snyder kicked her and Chris out of the GAMe PLACe following Chris's final ban from the store.
* [[Prank calls]]: Barbara yells in the background and foreground of several prank calls.

===Videos===
Barbara has appeared in six videos to date as of [[February 2015]]: off-camera in the [[Christian Weston Chandler Interview]], and on-camera (for the first time) in [[You're Always Pretty]]. [[ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004|Two decade-old videos]] were leaked in December 2014 showing the Chandlers celebrating Christmas. Another video of her was recorded by a [[troll]] as she and Chris left court after his hearing in February 2015. [[Donations Required, Serious. Please help|Two more]] [[Donations Requested, Please|videos]] were released June 2016 showing Chris begging for donations to buy asthma pills for Barbara. Barbara is shown practically dead in both of these videos so [[Chris and Death|god only knows what will happen in the near future.]]

In a [[Donations Further Requested, Please|video]] released on 13 July 2016, Barbara joins her son in shamelessly e-begging. Her voice tired and hoarse, mouth agape, she stares directly into the camera like a deer caught in the headlights.
{{-}}

==Gallery==

<center>
<gallery>
Image:Babs1956.PNG|Barb's 8th grade (or "Pre-Freshman") photo.
Image:Babs1957.PNG|Barb's freshman photo from high school.
Image:Babs1960.PNG|Barb's senior photo from high school.
Image:0002-1-Baby Chris and Mommy.jpg|Barbara with baby Chris. Oh, how full of hope and promise.
Image:0027-ChristopherWMom2.jpg|"Talk, you little idiot!"
Image:0026-ChrisAndMom.jpg
Image:0107-ChristianWMom.jpg|This is when [[The Simpsons]] went downhill.
Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg
Image:0096-MomRetire4.jpg|Barbara's retirement party from secretarial services at Virginia Power in 1996.<ref>[[:Image:0078-CWCNote2.jpg|DVD, note 2]]</ref>
Image:0029-BarbaraWithDrinks.jpg
Image:0113-MomsBirthday97-1.jpg|From her 55th birthday.
Image:0229-ChristianAndMomInClass.jpg
Image:0037-BarbaraInGreen.jpg|Nothing says the 80s like a woman in a power suit and a lady tie.
Image:0041-BarbaraCorinaTomAndHerriet.jpg|Barb with [[Aunt Corrina]], Uncle Tom, and Aunt Harriet.
Image:0042-BarbaraCorinaHerrietAndElvis.jpg|The King left the building when he started to notice the foul smell of the Chandler house.
Image:0618-BarbaraIs60-1.jpg|Poor Barb, Chris put [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] on HER birthday cake.
Image:0074-BarbaraWSonicDoll.jpg
Image:0540-Prom2.jpg|It was originally believed this image was from Chris's graduation. Turns out this is from his senior prom, where he took his mom as his date.
Image:0549-Prom11.jpg|Barb, talking to [[Tiffany Gowen|Tiffany]], one of Chris's [[gal pals]], at the prom.
Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|Barb, evolved into Snorlax.
Image:Babura.PNG|Barb [[You're Always Pretty|is always pretty]].
BarbMarch2012.png|Barb in 2012, having devolved from a Snorlax into a Munchlax.
File:SnoopyDoobieDoo.png|With [[Snoopy]] in [[2013]].
File:LegoSnorlax.jpg|As [[Chris]] sees her in [[Lego]] form
File:BarbAmiibo.jpg|Barb [[Amiibo]], complete with cleavage. Buy yours today on [[Etsy]].
File:Barb and anna.jpg|With Anna, presumably in August 2016.
</gallery>
</center>

==Sources==
<references/>

==External links==
*<s>[http://www.megaupload.com/?d=ZTK7XM3N GET OFF BEFORE I GO OFF]</s> DELETED

{{People}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Barbara}}
[[Category:Family Members]]

Chris and money

2016-12-02T18:10:09Z

Yoshi89`: /* Bank lawsuits against Barb */

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[File:Cwcshutup.png|thumb|Chris's response to literally any commercial.]]
{{quote|He's not good at math when it comes to managing money.|[[Bob Chandler]], understating it.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>}}

Chris has repeatedly shown though his actions and words that he has no idea how to handle '''money''' or manage his own finances. Between his impulse spending, [[Chris and his Ego|his greed and selfishness]], his unwillingness to save even the smallest amount of money, and his massive sense of entitlement, Chris manages to demonstrate complete incompetence and ineptitude in managing financial affairs. Chris has repeatedly amassed debt on credit cards, only to have his enabling parents bail him out multiple times. [[Monthly tugboat|Too lazy to work]], he refuses to make or follow any type of budget or financial plan, instead spending far beyond his means, and expecting others to pay off his accumulated debt for him. It is clear that [[Autism|Chris has no idea what financial responsibility is]] and that his enabling, delusional parents taught him nothing about how to handle finances while he was growing up. Irresponsible, careless, and thoughtless, Chris fails at just about every aspect of financial management that can be thought of.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed!==
For the vast majority of Chris's "adult" life, his only source of income has been the "[[tugboat]]" that he receives from the U.S. federal government every month. In 2009, the payout was $809 a month, placing his annual income at $9,708. After Bob's death, Chris was given a survivor's benefit - increasing the amount to $1,300 per month and making his annual income $15,600. Barb's income, from Social Security and a pension, is around $1,200 per month<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-24-14-leaked-text-may-we-borrow-your-house.6140/page-2#post-416099</ref>.

Chris's parents originally took $450 to pay for room and board;<ref name="Miyamoto" /> this payment was later increased to $565, and then to $580, after Bob paid off Chris's enormous credit card debt.<ref>[[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009#8 December]]</ref><ref>[[Jackie Chat 8]]</ref> How much he gets to keep these days isn't known.

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. Yet with my impuslive [sic] shoppiness [sic] (mostly controable [sic]), I end up spending my side-money after I get it.|Chris, [[Chris and His Ego|completely deluded and taking pride in being a lazy bastard]].<ref name="Miyamoto">[[Miyamoto Saga]]</ref>}}

===Chris and impulse spending===
It's obvious that Chris has no grasp on the real value of money, since he actively wastes as much of his monthly tugboat as possible on things like [[The Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[List of Chris's video games|video games]], [[alcohol]], [[Kaka Makeup Basics|make-up]], [[Lego|toys]], [[Mia Hamm|prostitutes]], and weekly lottery tickets<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 12]]</ref>.

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer.<ref name="Miyamoto" /> His [[PlayStation Network]] account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' single [[PlayStation 3]] game that he's ever purchased, and even for ''games he doesn't own'', and he also further promoted his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Sony fanboyism]] by later buying a Sony LCD HDTV for his bedroom which likely costs about $1,000-$1,500. All the while, Chris bought his [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] at second-hand discount thrift stores. Usually, children are taught the value of money at a very young age--not in Chris's case, apparently.

In September [[2013]], Chris complained about he and his mom going through "emotionally depressing, and Financial Downfall to the depths of Greatly Poor and Just Getting By",<ref>[[Facebook]]</ref> making it clear that the family income had dipped since Bob's passing. However, these supposedly lean times were apparently not enough to motivate Chris to get a job, or even to stop buying games, as evidenced by him racking up over $1,000 in game purchases on ''The Simpsons: Tapped Out''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chriss-spending-on-iphone-games.2035/</ref>.

Throughout the summer of 2014, Chris continued to spend thousands of dollars on [[Lego]] and other frivolities, all while whining and complaining on Facebook about his and his mother's poor finances. Chris financed this spending primarily with money from selling custom arts and crafts on his eBay account. Offering free shipping to customers, Chris would receive money from customers, and then pay for shipping out of his own pocket. However, Chris would immediately spend money as soon as it was deposited into his account, often leaving him unable to ship products to customers who had already paid him because of his own financial irresponsibility and negligence.

When several of Chris's eBay customers filed complaints against him because Chris failed to ship a order as promised and obligated, Chris responded by harassing and trolling the customers, posting their personal information in a public post on his Facebook account. In light of this, Chris's future money making prospects from eBay are dim, as most prospective future customers probably wouldn't want to risk being harassed or scammed by Chris.

All the while, even as Chris's credit card debt continued to spiral out of control, Chris continued to buy thousands of dollars of video games, Lego, and other frivolities. As if this were not bad enough, just days after putting his and Barb's cars up for sale, (at exorbitant prices) Chris went out and bought a 2010 Ford Focus, stating on Facebook that he had been approved for a loan, probably at a high interest rate. He also stated that paying for insurance on his new car was "killing" him, implying that either the insurance payment was costly, that he was having trouble paying it, or both.

In January 2015, it was [[CWCki Forums|leaked]] that Chris had spent an absurd amount of money on Nintendo consoles and games, racking up '''585''' transactions'' in the last 4.5 years<reF>http://kiwifarms.net/threads/2015-jan-12-nintendo-employee-details-chriss-recent-video-game-purchases.7050/</ref>, a list which includes useless shovelware, hoards of 1st party Nintendo software, Virtual Console games and [[Sonic Boom Protests|both versions of a game he doesn't even like]]. 276 of these purchases are known to be handheld games, 8 are known to be video game consoles (buying '''4''' DSs and DSis), and 75 which are known to be console games. The grand total cost of all Chris's '''listed''' purchases is '''$7460.43''' or '''$1657.87/year'''. Keep in mind 39% of purchases Chris has on his account are not yet specified, meaning that their cost is not included in this already insanely high number. This information comes on the heels of Chris begging people for money to fix his mother's cavities, as well as the financial worries that his trials will undoubtedly cause.

In [[July 2016]], a field agent provided the following account of Chris, in a situation where he did not have enough cash to pay for his junk food at a gas station<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-thoughts-questions.661/page-601#post-1615438</ref>:

{{quotebox|My friend walks into a gas station/convenience store on the northern edge of Charlottesville.
Chris is trying to buy $7 or so of junk food type stuff, but he only has $5 in cash.
The cashier tries to make understand he owes $2 more. Chris seems to understand, but is slow to process what to do about it.
My friend who is second in line, picks out two ones, says "here you go" and puts them on the counter.
Chris, it seems more out of stupidity and confusion than malice, picks up the $2 and his purchases and makes to leave.
My friend and the cashier, both object and yell that he has to leave the $2 with the cashier.
Chris doesn't seem to react.
A dude who was behind both of them in line is between Chris and the door. As Chris passes him, he taps him to get his attention, and says something like "Hey buddy ..."
Chris makes a get-away-from-me hand wavy gesture without looking at any of the three of them, and fairly loudly says "It's Miss!" and hurries out the door.
Chris continues to his car in a half run, half walk, as all three of the people in the store watch confused and amused.
Chris pulls out of the parking spot, but for some reason heads towards the back of the lot, where there is no exit.
As Chris gets to the back of the lot, he stops, backs up a few feet, tries to turn the car around, doesn't make it, backs up again, and finally gets around. Essentially making a 5 point turn in a fairly large empty parking lot.
Chris drives past the store again not looking inside, and finally drives off.}}

One dreads to imagine how his financial incompetence will affect him once Barb is dead - knowing Chris, and while it is quite tragic, he'll probably continue in his destructive spending patterns until he loses everything he has, and even then, he'll [[Ego|learn nothing]].

===Chris's parental enabling===
Bob encouraged his son to remain unemployed, since he believed that Chris would earn more money from his monthly tugboat than he would have from getting a job. However, this assumption was and is inaccurate. Minimum wage in the state of [[Virginia]] is $7.25 an hour. If Chris were to somehow do a complete 180° on his life and begin working a full 40-hour week, his monthly payment before taxes and payment for room and board would be about $1,260: that's $15,100 annually. Subtracting the money he pays his mom every month to live, as well as the 5% tax his income range mandates in the state of Virginia, Chris could very likely be left with a ridiculous $8,000, which knowing Chris, would be spent on yet more frivolities. Contrast this with the $2,748 Chris pulled in annually from the government after paying off his parents, and it becomes clear that Bob's encouragement came from either thinking Chris would lose his social security if employed (which he wouldn't) or the more accurate notion that his son is a useless failure.

A very likely explanation for Chris's reckless spending is that his parents are at fault (to a degree at least). In addition to coddling him throughout his entire life, they managed to make sure that Chris has never felt the repercussions for his exorbitant spending (or for anything else) by taking over paying Chris's credit card debt, regularly giving him about "$6 a day for small things", buying him [[List of restaurants|fast food]] on a daily basis, and continuing to let himself blow all his money on frivolities and useless stuff, as opposed to essentials like [[Chris and health#Chris and hygiene|hygiene products]], [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|courses that could eventually help him onto the employment ladder]] or [[Clown shirt|clothing that isn't unbelievably tacky]]. Whenever Chris manages to [[The GAMe PLACe|get himself into trouble]], he knows that [[Barb]] will come [[Matthew Noble call|running to his aid and defend him]] and dig him out of whatever mess he's managed to get himself into, even if it is clear that he [[Target|is in the wrong]]. This enabling is the most likely explanation (in addition to his [[autism|poor impulse control]]) for why Chris spends himself into debt as much as he does.

===Fan funding===
Chris has gotten well over $2,000 from his audience over the years.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Amount
! From
! Date received
! Details
|-
|$500
|[[Kiwi Farms]]
|[[January 2014]]
|Donated by fans after the house fire<ref>[[Destruction Of Chris's House#Aftermath and reaction]]</ref>.
|-
|$150
|Fans
|[[September 2014]]
|From a Kickstarter campaign in which Chris explicitly stated he would use it to buy Legos<ref>[[Kickstarter]]</ref>.
|-
|$1,000
|[[Weening|DStecks]]
|[[September 2015]]
|''See: [[Chris and Money#Etsy|Etsy]]''
|-
|$500
|Kiwi Farms user [[Weening|Sonic Rainboom]]
|[[September 2015]]
|Sent Chris a Visa card with $500<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-finds-a-gift-card-spends-it.13723/</ref>. Later admitted doing it to get "interesting content" from him, who has never acknowledged the anonymous gift<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-finds-a-gift-card-spends-it.13723/page-11#post-1054932</ref>.
<center><gallery>
File:Sonic rainboom $500 1.png|Rainboom spent $500 to find that Chris likes McDonalds.
File:Sonic rainboom $500 2.jpg
File:Sonic rainboom $500 3.jpg
</gallery></center>
|-
|Hundreds
|Fans
|Summer 2016
|During the [[Financhu Crisis]], a pattern formed of Chris begging for money, then briefly stating that he had received donations before begging for more money.
|}

===Chris's beliefs===
Chris believes that by receiving and spending his tugboat on useless junk, he is aiding the economy and paying for other people's tugboats.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever]]</ref> This is a [[Honor roll|damningly moronic conviction]], since sales tax goes to the state government and these "tugboats" are paid with ''federal'' payroll tax. Where Chris is hiding the printing press to afford this discretionary spending is unknown.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle money, Chris has an unhealthy [[Chris and his Ego|fixation]] on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff, and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond. His mother has served as a bad influence in both regards, as she would frequently shop at Goodwill and compulsively hoard the purchases, which both wasted money and helped turn their house into a [[Destruction Of Chris's House|fire hazard]].

===After the house fire===
On [[10 January 2014]], 14 Branchland Court caught fire. This would undoubtedly place the Chandlers in grim circumstances, due to the costs of rebuilding the home and replacing what was lost. Some of his fans pooled their funds to send him a care package, with a money order for $500<ref>[[Destruction Of Chris's House#Aftermath and reaction]]</ref>.

Many, concerned about Chris due to his wasteful spending habits, hoped that this would be the moment in Chris's life where he finally woke up and realized the importance of saving when things like this happen. Unfortunately, not even ''that'' has broken Chris's thick skull--throughout 2014, he wasted '''$5,000''' on ''Lego sets''<ref>[[Lego#Addiction and Financial Ruin]]</ref><ref>[[May 2014 Facebook Posts]]</ref>.

==Barb's toxic influence==
According to a troll with insider info, Chris was able to manage his own finances to a rudimentary degree, even after Bob passed away<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/giving-chris-money-debate-thread.22420/page-15#post-1844194</ref>, although he still has an issue with not saving money for [[Destruction Of Chris's House|potential emergencies]].

The troll also asserted that Chris's financial hardships are caused, in most part, by [[Barb]] helping herself to Chris's monetary accounts in order to attempt paying her out-of-control debts<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/giving-chris-money-debate-thread.22420/page-15#post-1844194</ref>.

{{quotebox|Barb is the one who has serious debt. She fucks up Chris' budgeting by erratically taking money from Chris' account when she needs it, generally without warning.

There are two types of Chris begging videos. One is when Chris wants a bit extra for some legos. You can identify those videos by how vague Chris' requests are, and how relaxed Chris is in the video. Chris isn't in meltdown mode in those videos.

Now, the other type of video is when Barb tried to snatch some money from Chris and Chris doesn't have anything for her. You can identify those videos by how freaked out Chris looks. He's visibly distressed and he's citing specific bills he's got to pay, usually things that seem un-Chris-like. That's when Barb is freaking out at him for not having enough money to pay her debts.

The thing is, the perception is that Chris is bad with money. He's not bad with money (as far as monthly budgeting goes). Despite how foggy Chris' head is, he's got enough memory to recognize patterns in bills over the course of a few months. He knows he's gotta pay electricity bills and rent and things like that. And he does do the math each month about what bills he's got to pay, and how much that leaves him for legos and food. You can't trust his begging. He begs because he wants more money, not because he's in any financial straits (that is, not including Barb).

He lives cheaply as shit. He saves money by buying dollar store shit. He's the type of person to buy single ply toilet paper at the dollar store. But sometimes he'll splurge and treat himself to things, like alcohol. He does this all while meeting his obligations, like his minimum payments and his bills.}}

Information from Cousin Al<ref>[[Catherine#The bowling outing]]</ref> revealed that Chris and Barb '''had''' an inheritance from Bob worth "tens of thousands of dollars." However, Barb spent all of it on hiring Rob Bell to defend herself (...and Chris) from legal charges incurred after [[28 October 2011|the two of them hit Michael Snyder with a car]].

In November 2014, Chris revealed to Renee that Barb was borrowing money from his life insurance<ref>[[Open Relationship E-mails#Barb is borrowing from Chris's life insurance]]</ref>.

===Bank lawsuits against Barb===
In 2016, two banks, Discovery and Capital One, sued Barb for not paying '''over $20,000 total''' in debts, leaving the Chandlers ''even further'' in financial turmoil.

Barb herself appeared in multiple videos in 2016, trying to scam people into donating to her.

*[[Donations Required, Serious. Please help]]
*[[Donations Requested, Please]]
*[[Donations Further Requested, Please]]

In the first two videos, Barb claimed not to have enough money for asthma medication, and in the third, she claimed to need money for dental work.

If Barb actually needed money for an emergency, she could simply have instructed Chris to sell some of their possessions. In the videos, Chris's toys and Barb's hoard are clearly visible behind them.

==Chris and credit cards==
That Chris has managed to acquire several credit cards is very surprising, but the foolishness with which he uses them wouldn't surprise anybody at all. As of [[February 2009]], Chris had managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (at the time of [[Mumble 4]], $1,000 of that sum came from the [[PSN]] store, but his bill for PSN downloads increased by the day) and had even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his own were maxed out. According to an [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|e-mail Chris sent to Vivian Gee]], by [[January 2010]] his debt was around $3,500 and had apparently been higher at some point in the intervening time.

By that point, Chris's debt had gotten so out of hand that Bob was forced to step in, making Chris reduce and manage on his spending, and forcing Chris to make regular payments to pay off his outstanding debt. Chris, thoughtless and uninterested in the fact that unpaid credit card debt accrues severe interest, had historically made payments in the smallest installments possible.

Chris provided some more details about this situation in his [[Jackie E-mails 6|e-mails to Jackie]] from [[July 2010]]. At some point, Bob paid off Chris's credit card debt and took payment in installments out of the tugboat in compensation. This foolish act of parental financial enabling allowed Chris to avoid the immediate consequences of his gross financial irresponsibility, and resulted in Chris learning nothing about how to manage his own finances, reinforcing Chris's attitude that he should be able to do anything that he wants and not suffer any negative consequences.

===Best Buy MasterCard===
Not surprisingly, it only took Chris a few short months to land himself in more financial trouble. In the [[Matthew Noble call]], Bob himself revealed that Chris had not only acquired a MasterCard charge account through [[Best Buy]], but as of the second week of [[August 2010]], Chris had predictably used it to land himself in yet more debt and had been laden with fees for bouncing a card payment.

One of Chris's [[Jackie E-mails 7|e-mails to Jackie]] reveals that Chris acquired the Best Buy charge card without his parents' permission; he only told them about it after receiving 2 bounced check fees that showed up on his bank statement, which his father was actively monitoring. In true Chris fashion, he tried to repay the minimum balance each month. When he was forced to reveal the debt to his parents, Bob was obviously less than thrilled. He promptly took control of Chris's bank account as well as his credit cards. From that point until Bob's death, he received only an allowance in the form of Visa gift cards, leaving him unable to accrue any more debt for a short time. At the time, the prospect of not being able to blow his welfare on frivolities [[Jackie E-mails 8|stressed him out]].

Curiously, even in his private communications with Jackie, Chris claimed that the overdraft fees that gave away the existence of the card to Bob were the work of trolls. Elsewhere in their conversations, however, he recounts other instances of "getting carried away" and accidentally overdrawing his bank account, suggesting that he was just using the trolls as a handy scapegoat for his own mistakes.

Bob, delusional and in the throes of some sort of conspiracy paranoia involving the staff and patrons of The GAMe PLACe, claimed that it was most likely [[Michael Snyder]] who had hacked Chris's credit card and checking accounts, though why someone who's been on a manager's salary for several years would bother stealing from any of the near-destitute Chandlers is unknown.

It's unknown why ''any'' financial institution would give Chris a line of credit at this point. Bob probably salvaged Chris's credit rating when he paid off all his prior card debt at once, but he angrily claimed Chris ruined it with the Best Buy debt (certainly true), and, in disturbingly Chris-like fashion, seemed to use this damning information to try to make Chris's latest brush with the [[Chris and the Law|law]] seem "petty" in comparison.

===Credit card debt===
Unverified information on Chris's credit card debt was leaked on the CWCki Forums on 4 June 2014. It was revealed that Chris had at least five active credit cards, with at least $7600 in combined credit limit. Of the five known active cards, at least four were revealed to be maxed out, with at least $7400 in unpaid debt between the five cards. It was estimated that the minimum payment on Chris's known debt was at least $220 a month, and it was revealed that the only reason that Chris had been able to obtain the credit that he had was that, historically, he had almost always at least paid the minimum payment each month, although it was implied that he rarely if ever paid more than the minimum.<ref>[http://cwckiforums.com/threads/chris-and-his-finances-an-in-depth-review-of-his-debt.3809/ CWCki Forums: "Chris and his finances: An in-depth review of his debt"] ([https://archive.today/K6R2c archived version])</ref>

===Payday Loan===
In early 2016, [[CatKnight Interview|Arthur Spatchcock]] discovered that Chris had taken out a Payday loan for $3,000<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/page-13#post-1392146</ref>.

{{quotebox|Chris 'borrowed' three thousand dollars. What he did with it is hazy, sure, but how do you think he bought all those lego sets for Lego Dimensions? }}

A payday loan charges extremely high interest rates, which does not bode well for Chris, due to his habit of only paying back minimal amounts at a time.

===Credit Increase===
In [[June 2016]], Chris's credit card company raised his credit limit. Chris reacted to this news by blowing his "bonus" on [[Transformers]] only to later beg for money over [[Facebook]] while blaming his [[Barb|mother's]] bill payments for their financial woes.
<center><gallery>
File:Transformers fb post1.jpg|Chris bragging about using his credit increase to buy Transformers
File:Transformers fb post2.jpg|''Nine minutes later'', Chris blamed his family's financial shortfalls on his mother's bill payments
</gallery></center>

==Money-Making Schemes==
===Wheeling and Dealing===
Also known as [[Wikipedia:Return fraud|return fraud]]. Chris has a habit of buying a product from one store for a lower cost, then exchanging it for a higher amount of store credit at another store<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 15]]</ref>.

===Lottery===
Chris considers the lottery to be ''an investment''. In September 2010, he told Jackie the following<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 12]]</ref>:

{{quotebox|I invest $4 weekly between Win For Life and Mega Millions; two plays each.}}

===Craigslist===
{{main|Craigslist}}
In late [[October 2011]], Chris posted a Craigslist ad for a 12-year old 32" CRT television and expected a non-negotiable $250 for it;<ref>[[Craigslist#Television]]</ref> in reality, this is about the price of a new flatscreen HDTV of that size, and he would be lucky to get a tenth of his asking price.

Chris placed two cars for sale on Craigslist in September 2014. One was a dilapidated, rusty 1997 Cadillac with a cracked engine block that hadn't run in over a year. Despite having a market value (as scrap) of approximately $150, Chris demanded $5,000 for the automobile, insisting that the cracked engine block made the car a great [[Chris and reality|"fixer upper."]] Chris also placed his mother's BMW Z3 for sale, demanding $15,000 for a car that had a book value of approximately $3,000.

===Pawn shops===
{{main|List of Chris's video games#Chris (barely) lets go}}

Chris occasionally visits pawn shops or similar businesses, among them Snooky's Pawn Shop, GameStop and Plan 9 Music, to sell his old toys so that he can afford new toys.

===Ebay===
{{main|eBay}}
Chris has long used Ebay to sell bits of his toy hoard. He doesn’t put much effort into researching prices, and he often lists items at vastly inflated prices. In August 2016, he listed a used VHS of ''Aladdin'' with a 'Buy it Now' price of $3,000. There were no (legitimate) takers, probably because one can buy the same edition on Amazon for ''one penny'' (plus shipping, but still).

On 1 June 2014, he began cashing in on his Internet infamy, by offering custom artwork for sale. He later expanded his sales to include autographed photos, medallions, and custom Amiibos.

===Kickstarter===
{{main|Kickstarter}}
On 23 September 2014, Chris opened a Kickstarter project, asking for $5,000 worth of Legos. At the end of the campaign, Chris raised $150 from 27 backers.

===Etsy===
{{main|Etsy}}
On 2 September 2015, Chris relocated his online business to Etsy. He continued the same offerings from Ebay and added a donation listing for the continuation of the Sonichu series. Days later, on 5 September, a YouTuber named [[Weening|DStecks]] gave Chris $1,000, thinking that Chris would deliver 100 pages of Sonichu. Instead, Chris completed 16 pages before dropping the project. In addition to DStecks, dozens of fans had also donated. Chris simply claimed that he was too stressed to continue Sonichu 11<ref>[[February 2016 Facebook Posts#Bleeding Autism]]</ref>.

However, Chris still had passion for making custom Amiibos for several months afterwards. He wasted hundreds of dollars buying up Amiibos on Ebay, thinking that the market for his custom figures would sustain itself indefinitely. This was not the case. and Chris eventually grew apathetic and bored with earning his own money.

To complicate things, in March 2016, Chris purchased a PS4. The new life upgrade proved too distracting, and he ignored Etsy orders, often for months. Ultimately, Etsy took notice and banned his store from doing business.

===Lulu===
In September 2015, Chris began selling printed copies of the Sonichu comic on Lulu.com<ref>[[September 2015 Facebook Posts#Now Chris is on Lulu]]</ref>, as well as offering autographed versions through Etsy (by ordering the comics from Lulu, signing them, then shipping to the buyers).

A few weeks later, he changed the Lulu listing to private. He then edited the book listing on Etsy with the following:

{{quotebox|<nowiki>**Please note:</nowiki> This is the ONLY way to order the book; I have the books printed through Lulu.com. And each copy sent from me will be shipped in a plastic Comic Book Sleeve with cardboard lining, inside a large envelope. My price here covers shipping from there to me, and then to you. Thank you.}}

When asked, Chris stated that he had to do it that way because of [[trolls|the haters]]<ref>[[:File:Lulu listing.png]]</ref>.

This shady business arrangement likely left Chris with less profit. When it was publicly visible, the Lulu listing had a price of $9.99. On Etsy, he charged $10, with a $5 shipping cost. If he paid a $3.99 cost (the same shipping price for a similarly-sized comic to a U.S. address) for Lulu to ship to him, that left a $1.02 difference between the shops, and he would have used more than that to cover shipping from him to his customer<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/9-23-15-printed-number-zero-book-now-available-through-lulu.12833/page-6#post-1031395</ref>.

In December 2015, Chris was banned from Lulu for selling [[Sonichu (comic)|fan fiction]]<ref>[[December 2015 Facebook Posts#Lulu Account Suspended]]</ref>. In true Chris fashion, he responded by threatening Lulu’s executives with physical violence<ref>[[December 2015 Facebook Posts#Threatening Lulu's Executives]]</ref>, despite the fact that he was on probation for [[26 December 2014|an act of violence]] against a GameStop employee..

Chris was able to continue selling comics, supposedly through Ka-blam instead<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/1-13-new-book-listing.16419/#post-1207002M</ref>. However, no copies of books ordered through Ka-blam have turned up, and books ordered after his banning still had the Lulu logo<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/problems-success-with-ordering-from-cwcville-etsy-ebay.17301/page-14#post-1273098</ref>, even though Chris had claimed to be out of stock. It’s likely that Chris simply rejoined Lulu under an alternate account.

===Zazzle===
In November 2015, Chris announced that he would be setting up a shop on Zazzle.com<ref>[[Thank You, Jeff, and I accept your apology.]]</ref>. He mentioned it again half a year later, in June 2016<ref>[[Cwcville Shopping is on Vacation]]</ref>.

He has yet to finish opening a shop there.

It’s unknown why Chris is dragging his feet on making a Zazzle store. All he would have to do is take some Sonichu drawings and upload them. There are no startup costs. Zazzle takes care of manufacturing and shipping.

In 2015, Chris was willing to drive hundreds of miles through Virginia just to buy parts for Amiibos to sell on Etsy<ref>[[Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers]]</ref>. In 2016, he couldn’t even be bothered to move the mouse on his computer a few times to earn some money from Sonichu.

===Patreon===
{{main|Patreon}}
Chris joined on 30 November 2016, after Barb had to pawn a necklace, which she had to sell at a significant loss for $325, to pay debts/bills.

Patreon has extremely liberal definitions for fundraising goals and does not impose consequences on creators who fail to deliver,<ref>[[https://patreon.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/212995103-What-do-I-do-if-a-creator-didn-t-deliver-a-reward-or-stopped-posting-content-]]</ref>, making this yet another platform for Chris to [[Etsy|get paid without doing work]], much like his current Support button on YouTube.

===Wish lists===
'''2015'''

On 13 [[December 2015]], Chris [[December 2015 Facebook Posts#GIMME GIFTS|posted]] an Amazon.com wish list. It was filled with over a thousand dollars worth of PS4 consoles, Lego sets and Skylanders toys.

Screenshots of the wish list can be found [https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-thoughts-questions.661/page-671#post-1887026 here].

Trolls responded by spamming the "Buying this gift elsewhere?" option<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/12-13-seasons-greetings.15325/page-17#post-1152508</ref>. Chris believed that the items disappearing meant that he would be getting lots of toys for Christmas. Of course, he reacted to this supposed good fortune by '''making another wish list''', containing over $1,000 worth of Transformers action figures, Amiibos, and DVDs.<ref>[[Chris reveals his measurements]]</ref>

Screenshots of the second wish list can be found [https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-12-21-chris-on-amazon-wishlists-and-donating-a-ps4.15610/page-3#post-1162967 here].

He also requested "pretty dresses of blue or red" and gave his measurements as "44/39/40." Notably, one of the items he had marked as highest priority was the [[Megatron pistol]], implying that the original was lost or damaged in the 2014 house fire.

'''2016'''

During [[February 2016]], Chris begged his audience to buy him a PS4 with accessories for his birthday<ref>[[February 2016 Facebook Posts#GIMME STUFF FOR MY BIRTHDAY]]</ref>. He did not use Amazon, saying, "the Amazon Wish List is a definite fickle."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/February_2016_Facebook_Posts#GIMME_STUFF_FOR_MY_BIRTHDAY</ref>

He provided a wish list with several links to stores such as GameStop and Best Buy. Notably, he had ended his "[[Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers|embargo]]" against those shops, specifically to allow his fans to go there and buy him gifts.

He tried to provide an incentive, by offering a $500 voucher for his [[Etsy]] shop:

{{quotebox| The FIRST Person who purchases and sends me one, and I receive it Before or On February 24, 2016, I Will make and issue to the person a Big Voucher for $500 off on Cwcville Shopping. Which is equal to Ten Sonichu/Rosechu family Figures (more or less, depending on which ones), so all the person needs to pay on that order is the Shipping, and that order will definitely take up to Eight weeks for material figure acquiring, creations and certification.}}

After his birthday passed with no PS4, Chris uploaded [[Update: 2/25/16]], in which he complained about the lack of gifts, saying he had only gotten empty gift cards and a non-winning lottery ticket. He concluded the video by saying, "thanks for nothing!" In [[March 2016]], Chris [[Sonichu's First PS4 Broadcast|claimed]] that he had received a PS4 from [[Gal Pal E-mails 4#Used Porn for Sale|Kagney Lynn Moore]]. In reality, Chris had bought it himself<ref>[[March 2016 Facebook Posts#PS4 Thanks]]</ref>.

In [[November 2016]], Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Wish list for 2016|posted]] another wish list, days after making [[Pmurt#Death Threats|death threats against President-elect Donald Trump]]. He requested $859.71 worth of toys<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-11-12-chriss-2016-wish-list-transformers-joke.25759/page-4#post-1876942</ref>. He also [[Chris and negotiation|forbade people from sending him gift cards]].

Halfway through November, Chris tweeted that he had bought several of the toys off his own wish list.<ref>[[Twitter#More wish list demands]]</ref>

On 26 November, Chris updated his wish list, removing the items he had bought from it<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Updated wish list]]</ref>and surprisingly not adding more toys, in spite of the [[Help, please]] begging video he had made in the meantime. However, the updated wish list's links were all broken, due to Chris simply copy-and-pasting the message from an earlier post. He failed to notice, even though the post has a large Page Not Found error thumbnail on it.

===Sonichu Entertainment of America===
In [[May 2016]], Chris displayed a level of financial ignorance that shatters any hope of him ever becoming competent with money. Days after [[Please, Donate|begging for donations]] to assist his ailing household, he announced that he would be starting [[Sonichu Entertainment of America|his own business]], with the declaration that each employee's salary would be ''25% of the profit.'' Naturally, Chris completely fails to realize that under these conditions, he would have no money at all if he had four or more employees. However, that's just the tip of the iceberg; days later, he uploaded [[Proposition to Sega|a video]] attempting to go into business with Sega to create official Sonichu products. In the video, he demands a six-figure salary, along with [[Chris and health|full insurance benefits]] and [[Chris and reality|maternity leave]]. These incidents seem to indicate Chris's belief that money comes out of nowhere and is unlimited in value.

===YouTube monetization===
Chris has monetized most of the videos which appear on his YouTube channel, as another way of [[Etsy|profiting]] from his internet infamy. As further proof of Chris's entitlement issues, [[CatKnight Interview|Arthur Spatchcock]] discovered that at one point around [[March 2016]], Chris received $80 and was "pissed" that he hadn't gotten more.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-6#post-1496271</ref>

{{quotebox|This is going to become a pattern. Chris is going to do one of his 'Let's Plays' followed by an e-begging video and then polish it off by purchasing some dumb thing he doesn't need in excess of fifty bucks. He knows how this system works and it's the greatest amount of payoff with the least amount of work; the first time when Chris played Destiny he made 80$ from Youtube(And was surprisingly pissed it was that small, fuck that, I want eighty bucks from Youtube). Then he makes a video whining about how he needs more money and lo and behold, he gets even more~! If anything people are contributing to his float and that convinces him he can get away with being frivolous that much more. }}

===Let’s Plays===
In [[March 2016]], [[CatKnight Interview|Arthur Spatchcock]] introduced Chris to the idea of doing Let's Plays to boost his online activity and help him gain some money through YouTube's monetization program<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chrischan-interview-part-4-5-3-28-16.16934/page-16#post-1317924</ref><ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-6#post-1496271</ref>. The plan fell apart after Let's Plays of [[CWC's Destiny start|Destiny]] and [[Live Game Stream - Uncharted|Uncharted]], since by that point, Chris was [[Chris and Health|too lazy]] to play video games for money, and he simply wanted to [[Financhu Crisis|beg from his audience]] instead.

===YouTube Support button===
On 23 May 2016, Chris [[Live Game Stream - Uncharted|announced]] the debut of a Support button on his YouTube channel to replace the Etsy donation listing (which was forcibly removed due to it violating Etsy's TOS). He apparently got this idea from [[William Elliott Waterman]].<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-reads-unicorns-rainbows-and-a-bluebird-of-happiness.21663/page-24#post-1563368]]</ref>

===Skylanders custom merchandise===
On 24 November 2016, Chris asked his audience to watch a clip of him playing Skylanders, by uploading [[CWC vs Koas]], in order to promote the idea of selling his [[Chris and his Ego#Fixation on self-image|in-game figure]] to them using the game's [https://www.skylanders.com/creator Skylanders Creation app].

He would charge "$20 extra" for his autograph. He also said, "I am not sharing my creation app chirp," since this would allow people to order directly from Skylanders and cut off Chris's goal of [[Sonichu Amiibo#Custom Chris Chan Amiibo Complete Three Piece Set (from Original Creator)|profiting from his self-image]] <ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-24-cwc-vs-koas.26067/#post-1900190</ref>.

===Paid Video Requests===
{{main|Paid Video Requests}}
In December 2015, [[$50 for a video holiday greeting!|'''the singularity''']] happened. On Etsy, Chris offered to create a personalized video message for anyone who paid $50. Many of his fans took him up on the offer, thinking they could become [[Weening|a part of Christory]] by simply handing their money over to him. He received four sales within the first three days<ref>[[:File:Etsy unlisted videos.jpg]]</ref>, although those customers opted for their videos to be unlisted. A few people also chose public videos for their birthday shoutouts.<ref>[[Happy Birthday Tom]]</ref><ref>[[Happy Birthday, Martin.]]</ref><ref>[[Happy Birthday, Jonathan]]</ref>.

After losing his Etsy shop, Chris continued offering video requests through text messages<ref>[[Update 20160718]]</ref>.

The videos Chris delivers are characterized by:

*Laziness. He has often been late on delivering, missing deadlines for birthday greetings, despite having an abundance of free time.<ref>[[Happy Birthday, Martin.]]</ref><ref>[[Happy Birthday Tom]]</ref>

*Sloppiness. Chris chooses not to edit his takes or look presentable. He has delivered a video featuring an upskirt shot of his maxipad.<ref>[[Paid Video Requests#Singing "Yellow Submarine"]]</ref>

*Explicitly stating that the content is boring. In many videos, Chris has mentioned his low opinion of his customers, saying things like, "Eh, whatever," and "Wow, that's crazy, that's jus'... I feel like... it's weird. Whatever," while rolling his eyes.<ref>[[Paid Video Requests#Copypasta: Sexual Helicopter]]</ref><ref>[[Paid Video Requests#Copypasta: Gorilla Warfare]]</ref>

*Filling up paid content time with drivel or off-topic rambling<ref>[[September 2016 Paid Video Requests#Paid Message to the Trolls]]</ref><ref>[[Happy Birthday Tom]]</ref>, despite the fact that his videos are advertised as "around a minute in length, on average, but can be longer in time length."<ref>[[Etsy#Custom, Birthday, Holiday, or General, Greeting Video featuring Christine Weston Chandler]]</ref>

In spite of these issues, he has a continuing stream of customers. One, a Kiwi Farms user named Vanillacone, summed up the mindset of the lot with his review of [[Happy Birthday, Jonathan|the $50 paid video he ordered from Chris]] (which consisted of him being late, babbling to fill up time, failing to spell the recipient's name correctly and delivering a video 39 seconds long out of the minimum one minute):

{{quotebox|To be honest, I got what I expected out of the video, and money well spent in my opinion.}}

===Prostitution===
On 19 June 2016, aka Father’s Day, Chris decided to become [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|a prostitute]].

He has not yet had any takers.

===Begging===
{{main|Financhu Crisis}}
[[File:Please, Donate (720p).mp400001.png|thumb|Chris, proving he has zero self-awareness]]
One of the earliest instances of Chris e-begging for money was in [[9 December 2009|December of 2009]]. Chris exhorted his alleged European [[Trolls|fanbase]] to donate €1,000 in order to remove troll ads from the CWCipedia.

In 2014, after his house [[Destruction Of Chris's House|caught fire]], Chris again resorted to e-begging for money, placing extra emphasis on ''"My mother and I really need the money,"'' despite dropping more than '''$5,000''' on expensive [[Lego]] sets to feed his worsening addiction. One would think that Chris would have wised up to the fact that his wanton spending and lack of gainful employment are contributing to his woes, but one glance at his [[May 2014 Facebook Posts]] could easily tell you that he's seeing his situation as an avenue to get stuff from people, the most ridiculous of which being a "$300 Sea Cow" on his wish list, which would not benefit anybody but himself in the slightest.

In 2016, Chris's e-begging drastically increased, as a result of the Chandlers' stubborn refusal to live within their means. That year saw Chris spend over $1,000 on toys, while both Chris and Barb had court cases resolved which penalized them with steep costs. In addition, Barb joined in to the begging, appearing in three videos so far.<ref>[[Donations Required, Serious. Please help]]</ref><ref>[[Donations Requested, Please]]</ref><ref>[[Donations Further Requested, Please]]</ref>

He asked for donations, or at least mentioned them, in many of the posts and videos he made in 2015 through 2016. At first, this was supposedly to fund his production of Sonichu merchandise, but he later shifted to saying that he and Barb needed help with paying the bills and buying groceries. While it's entirely possible that Chris was simply lying to get more money for [[Lego|useless]] [[Video games|crap]], this indicates that the financial hardships, which [[White knights|many]] [[Trolls|people]] have warned him about, have finally arrived. Only time will tell how his financial situation ultimately plays out, but given his attitude and inaction, the future definitely doesn't seem bright.

==In the comic==

[[File:Cwccash.jpg|thumb|250px|[[CWCville]] currency.]]
In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris in real life. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the [[United States of America|American]] populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two-story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21#Home economics|"paid" in average]] of US$3,500 a month just to hang around. And maybe for the occasional [[Sonichu 9|city defense]] or [[A Sonichu Day|errand]].<ref>[[Mailbag 21#Home economics]]</ref>

While legislating as mayor of [[CWCville]], he equated 10 years in prison to a US$1,500 fine.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> He also equated fifty hours of [[Wikipedia:Community service|community service]] to $500 (for any [[sex]]ual violations).<ref>[[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck]]</ref>

In [[Sonichu_9#Episode_19:_Date_Ed_.28Even_Though_the_Idea_Sounds_Dated.29|Episode 19]], it's shown that CWCVille actually issues its own currency, in the form of C-Quarters and W-Quarters. Ten C-Quarters make up a W-Quarter - don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, considering [[honor roll|what the word "quarter" means]]. (Our best guess: C-Quarters = US$0.25, W-Quarters = US$2.50) Nor does it explain why fines are levied in U.S. dollars: perhaps to bolster the dictatorship's foreign currency reserves, ''à la'' [[Wikipedia:North Korea|North Korea]].

This makes even less sense considering [[CWCVille]] is part of the [[United States]]. States, let alone cities, cannot print their own money, despite holding considerable power over their own affairs. The Constitution expressly forbids anyone else other than the federal government from issuing currency. However, it has been somewhat common for companies, communities and local governments to issue localized currency known as 'scrip', a depression era practice still seen from time to time. [[Chris]] being Chris, and likely reading [[Goosebumps]] instead of paying attention in class likely is wholly unaware of this information.

On the [[CWCipedia]] article on Sonichu, Chris wrote that [[Rosechu]] is usually the one who cooks for her family, but when Sonichu cooks for his wife and [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|kids]] he "will go as HIGH in portions as a Banquet", even though he only cooks for five individuals.<ref name=>[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#Married Life and Children Sonichu]</ref> This suggest that Sonichu is just as frivolous with money as his father.

===Soup hotels===

Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American [[Wikipedia:Social Security (United States)|Social Security]] system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]." This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels.|Chris with a very bad idea [http://leoweekly.com/news/left-wayside that has come to fruition in one American city...]}}

Chris depicts "Soup Hotels" as buildings ten stories tall with between ten and twenty rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, beds, lighting and cable television.<ref>[[Mailbag 20#This still implies that CWCville has a massive homeless problem]]</ref> Of course, the homeless stay there for free. So, instead of building homeless shelters with dormitories, common rooms, and shared TV sets, Chris thinks the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a ''bona fide'' hotel. This means that, in [[CWCville]], there are around 1,500 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, choked by heavy taxes needed to pay those social expenses, being unable to make a profit there and thus moving away.

In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], [[Ultra Sonichu]] and a bevy of [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechus]] stop at a soup hotel. The building is labeled Soup Hotel 17, implying that [[CWCville]] has had to open at least seven new homeless shelters in the span of a month, or they're just bad at numbering the things. Or more tellingly, that the economy of CWCville is crashing to the ground, fast.

==In other works==
In [[Mumble 6]], Chris discussed making a TV show called ''The Chris Chandler Show''. One of his demands was the show should not have any commercial breaks, either showing a distinct lack of understanding as to how a TV station makes money, or perhaps he plans to sell the advertising fees to a single company so that they can play a long ad in the beginning of the air time and leave the rest of the show uninterrupted, ''à-la'' the season premieres of [[wikipedia:24 (TV Series)|''24'']]. We cannot know for sure, but he has probably seen at least one show that has done this, and gathered the idea from there.

In [[Mailbag 29#In which Chris loses his mind|Mailbag 29]] he stated that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of state-run brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp, pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free [[Dating education|Sex Ed classes]] for [[virgin]]s.

In real life, according to Chris, he tried to scam his way out of paying for sex with a Craigslist [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|prostitute]] who was charging $100 per hour by telling her about the trolls, his life story, and his many personal problems. He said the prostitute then hung up on him.

Chris also proves us that, in the possibility of being part of a family, he wouldn't be the main purveyor. In the [[PlayingHouse]] video, his [[sweetheart]] of [[Jackie|the moment]] is portrayed as a successful journalist with high ambitions while he's a [[14 Branchland Court|stay at home]] Dad. Even then, he portrays himself doing "hard work" like [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|changing diapers]] and watching over the kids. In this last role, he's so incompetent that he needs to recruit his [[Crystal|preschool daughter]] to watch over [[Reginald Chandler|his son]] while he's shopping. This is paralleled by his real life situation - with [[Bob]] gone, one would assume that he'd be the "man of the house" and assume some responsibility for once. Unfortunately, as evidenced by his [[This is how the Trial went|admission in court,]] Barb is still pulling his ass out of any such concept by paying his court fees. Keep in mind that, by extension, Chris is being minded by an ailing woman's retirement money which was used to bail him out of a mess that ''he'' started, while he wastes his own money on meaningless frivolities.

== Conclusion ==

Given Chris's carefree abandon when it comes to his spending habits, many are actually concerned as to what will happen to Chris when Barb passes on and he has to fend for himself. If past (and present) experiences are any indication, it's that if Chris continues on his path of not saving his money and spending it on frivolous crap that he doesn't need, he'll wind up broke and in severe debt. A [[Mumble_4|past conversation]] with [[Clyde Cash]] revealed that he doesn't even know the basic expenses that go into running a household, and we all know how Chris's plan of [[PlayingHouse|marrying a sweetheart to dump all of the financial responsibilities on her]] will [[Sweetheart#Will Chris ever have a Sweetheart?|turn out.]]

Long story short, if Chris doesn't start saving for his future now, then when Barb finally passes on, he won't have one to look forward to. And he'll have nobody to blame but himself. ''(Not that he won't try, of course.)''

==See also==
*[[Monthly tugboat]]
*[[Financhu Crisis]]

== References ==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

Financhu Crisis

2016-12-02T18:07:48Z

Yoshi89`:

[[File:Please, Donate (720p).mp400001.png ‎|thumb|400px|Chris's online activity for much of 2016]]
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Begging Counter}}

The '''Financhu Crisis''' is a term coined by users from [https://kiwifarms.net '''Kiwi Farms'''] to describe the steep decline in the Chandler family's financial management beginning in early [[2016]].

Signs of the Chandlers' worsening finances were made apparent by the increasing amounts of begging videos and donation requests on [[YouTube]] and [[FaceBook]].

Given that [[Barb]] is elderly on a [[tugboat|fixed income]], and [[Chris]] is [[stress|''lazy'']] on a fixed income, one could only bleakly speculate what will happen when Chris is eventually left to fend for himself once Barb is no longer around.

==Summary==

[[File:Financhu Wordle.png ‎|thumb|400px|A wordcloud of the videos and Facebook posts Chris made during the Financhu Crisis. Note how big "money" and "donations" are...]]
To this day, the Chandlers' financial woes are caused by their own irresponsible behaviors. Chris, [[Chris and money|learning absolutely nothing over the years]], has squandered any available money on [[Lego|children's toys]], [[PS4|video games]], [[McDonalds|fast food]], and [[sex toys]]. Barb, on the other hand, has simply been ignoring long-term debts and letting them pile up to alarming amounts.

'''Chris''' has made some half-assed efforts (but ''efforts'', nonetheless) to generate some income for the household over the past few years, which included opening an [[Etsy|Etsy shop]] and selling various possessions on [[eBay]]. The Etsy shop (started in 2015) proved to be a somewhat successful venture for Chris, as he made a fair amount of revenue out of butchering Nintendo Amiibos into makeshift Sonichu merchandise. These efforts would eventually be for naught, as Chris immediately spent the profits on expensive Lego sets as soon as he got the money. His Etsy shop eventually got shut down when he began to [[Stress|not fulfill new orders]] for months on end, likely due to him finding more interest in shameless begging for money online [[Chris and reality|in return for nothing]]. He then started listing a few items on eBay ([[Chris_and_negotiation#His_sales_on_eBay_and_Craigslist|demanding ridiculous prices]]), but achieved little profit with only managing to sell a rare Pokemon card or two. Chris has found some new success in acquiring donations from all of that e-begging, but like the profits from the Etsy store, the money immediately gets blown on [[toys]] and [[video games|games]].

'''Barb''' seems to have outstanding debt that would appear to dwarf Chris' financial handiwork. As of [[September 2016]], she faced lawsuits from Discover Bank and Capital One for failing to pay the large amounts of her credit card debt, according to Virginia District Court records. It is worth noting that it takes a lot of ignored [[Trolls|debt collector]] calls over a long period of time to get a simple credit card debt escalated to a lawsuit, suggesting that Barb may have been outright ignoring making any payments to her credit cards. Only time will tell if more creditor companies begin to sue Barb for her neglect. In [[August 2016]], Chris revealed that the household is still under a mortgage of $115,000, introducing a far more worrying debt looming over the horizon.

Both Chris and Barb continue to barely stay afloat with their lives thanks to their own [[tugboat]]s, but their lavish lifestyle of reckless spending will not last forever at this rate.

Despite it all, '''Chris has not once attempted to find a job'''.

==Outstanding Debts==
{{Incomplete}}

This table summarizes various unpaid debts charged to credit cards and other owed amounts between Chris and Barb over the course of the "Financhu Crisis". Keep in mind that these are only amounts found by [[CWCki|Christorians]] via Chris' Facebook posts and Virginia District Court public records. The Chandlers could likely be in deeper debt than we know.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|-
!data-sort-type="date"|Date
!data-sort-type="string"|Item
!data-sort-type="currency" |Amount
|-
|1 March 2016
|PS4 purchase (with credit card)
!style="text-align:right;" |$540.00
|-
|16 March 2016
|Discover Bank court case
!style="text-align:right;" |$4,706.93
|-
|April 2016
|Payday loan
!style="text-align:right;" |$3,000
|-
|31 August 2016
|Mortgage (revealed on Facebook)
!style="text-align:right;" |$115,000.00
|-
|14 September 2016
|Capital One court case
!style="text-align:right;" |$15,906.99
|- class="sortbottom"
!style="background-color:#E9E9E9; text-align:right;", colspan="2"|Grand Total
!style="font-weight:bold;color:#FF0000"|$139,153.92
|}

==Chris's toy expenses==
[[File:Had-to-pay-3fyhaf (credit to Gunslinger).png|thumb|300px|A recurring theme throughout the Crisis]]

This is a list of the known toy expenses Chris has made during the 2016 Financhu Crisis, collected from online postings. There are likely more which haven't been revealed, since Chris regularly goes to retail stores such as Toys R Us and Target.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Amount
! Toy(s) bought
|-
|$540
|PS4<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/internet-detective-proves-chris-bought-the-ps4-himself.18249/</ref>.
|-
|$500~
|31 games for the PS4. <ref>http://psnprofiles.com/Sonichu&completion=all&order=played&pf=ps4#content</ref> Many of those are franchise games, costing around $30-50, while a few are free downloads or micro-transactions.
|-
|$425.88
|A single Ghostbusters Lego set<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/</ref>.
|-
|$550~
|Transformers<ref>[[List of toys#Transformers: Titans Return]]</ref>
|-
|$90
|[[Waifu|Naru]]
|-
|$105+
|Skylanders<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_toys#Skylanders</ref>
|-
|$125~
|Pokemon<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_toys#Pokemon</ref>
|-
|$12.99
|Amiibos<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_toys#Nintendo_AmiibosM</ref>
|-
|$'''2,348.87'''
|'''Total'''
|}

==2016 Timeline==

===March===
*1st - Chris buys a PS4, worth $540, from Fingerhut (using a credit card)<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/internet-detective-proves-chris-bought-the-ps4-himself.18249/</ref>.
*16th - Barb is found guilty in a debt case involving Discover Bank. The judgement states that she owes $4,706.93<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/barb-sued-by-discover-bank.18379/page-28#post-1324090</ref>.
*19th - Chris spends $425 on a single Lego set<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/</ref>.

===April===
*12th - [[Please, Donate|Chris begs]]. This video is notable for being the first video devoted to asking for money.
*16th - It's revealed that Chris borrowed $3,000 from a payday loan<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/page-13#post-1392146</ref>.
*24th - [[Donation Request|Chris begs]] again, this time without offering crafts in exchange.

===May===
*4th - The donations listing on Chris's Etsy shop is removed, presumably for violating TOS<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/fb-4-29-chris-is-excited-about-ratchet-clank-totes-swag.20150/page-10#post-1434759</ref>.
*9th - Chris spends $60 on his [[waifu|waifu]].
*23rd - The Chandlers pay $616.52 for the first half of 14BC's 2016 [[:File:Property tax 2016 part1.png|property tax]].
*23rd - [[Donations, Please, plus Live Game Stream tonight.|Chris begs]] for bananas. He also [[Live Game Stream - Uncharted|announces]] the debut of a Support button on his Youtube channel to replace the Etsy listing.
*25th - Chris begs [[May 2016 Facebook posts#Etsy listing removal|in a Facebook post]] while reminding readers that Etsy removed his donation listing and that he has a Support button on Youtube instead.
*26th - Chris begs [[May 2016 Facebook posts#Uncharted video and donations|on Facebook]], links to his game stream of Uncharted and repeats his statements from the 25th.
*28th - Chris spends nearly $100 on Transformers<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/</ref>.
*29th - Chris spends another $30 on his waifu<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-8#post-1498444</ref>.
*31st - Chris spends $150 more on Transformers<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-6#post-1496692</ref>.

===June===
*8th - Chris's Etsy shop is closed<ref>[[Etsy#Shop Closure]]</ref>, presumably for failing to send orders.
*11th - [[Cwcville Shopping is on Vacation|Chris begs]] for money in the same video in which he announces that his shop is closed. Starting from this video, Chris adds his begging to the video descriptions.
*14th - Chris begs to have $100 for Barb's asthma medicine, in [[Donations Required, Serious. Please help|two]] [[Donations Requested, Please|videos]] which feature Barb.
*17th - [[Reading "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness" Chapter 1|Chris begs]] to have $200 for an electric bill, while reading a fanfic called "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness".
*19th - [[Reading "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness" Chapter 2|Chris begs]], again saying he wants $200 for an electric bill, and also wanting food money, while reading another chapter of Bluebird.
*19th - Chris wants to become a [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|prostitute]], in an attempt to get both money and china.
*26th - Chris begs his half-brother [[Cole Smithey|Cole Smithey]] for financial help, while simultaneously insulting him for "pissing and burning" the money he earns from working as a movie critic on apartment rent<ref>[[June 2016 Facebook posts#O brother, where art thou?]]</ref>.
*29th - [[Announcement 06292016|Chris begs]], saying that even though he got donations, he wants more because "we could still do better," before reading the third chapter of Bluebird.

===July===
*1st - Chris pays his $541 court costs for pepper-spraying a Gamestop employee in 2014<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/7-1-chris-paid-his-court-costs.22142/</ref>.
*8th - [[Rainbows Unicorns and a Bluebird of Happiness Chapter 4|Chris begs]] while reading chapter four of Bluebird.
*9th - [[Announcement 20160709|Chris begs]] in a long rant, saying he is stressed from dealing with finances. He mentions a mortgage among the bills. He wants food money for himself, Barb and their pets.
*10th-11th - [[HELP, PLEASE!!!|Chris begs]] in a series of four videos, wanting $20 or $50. He demeans himself on camera to get people to donate. Finally, he thanks people for sending the "minimum $20" before begging to have money for Barb's teeth.
*13th - [[Donations Further Requested, Please|Barb begs]] to have money for her dental work.
*13th - Chris finally decides to sell some of his toys to raise money. He lists one Pokemon card on eBay for $50.<ref>[[July 2016 Facebook posts#Chris Offers a Pokemon Card for Sale]]</ref>
*14th - Chris lists two more Pokemon cards on eBay, for $100 each.
*15th - Chris begs for food money in a [[July 2016 Facebook posts#"I'm not on drugs!"|Facebook post]], complaining that people aren't willing to donate anymore.
*18th - [[Update 20160718|Chris begs]] for money in the same video in which he reads an anniversary dedication, while expecting to be paid $50 for it.
*18th - One of the $100 Pokemon cards Chris listed on eBay is sold<ref>http://offer.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewBidsLogin&item=282101638696</ref>.
*20th-22nd - Chris produces [[Paid Video Requests|eight videos]] to earn money from his fanbase.
*23rd - Chris returns to begging [[July 2016 Facebook posts#2 Strikes on Youtube|on Facebook]]. He also announces that "this window is for Donations Only. No video requests until further notice," after his Youtube account receives its second strike against it for violating policy on "nudity or sexual content" after [[Paid Video Requests#Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Shake my boobies|a video]] he uploaded on the 22nd got reported. He [[:File:Cwc-crayolasword-stitched.png|also begs]] to a Kiwi Farms user named crayolasword who asks him about the situation.
*24th - Chris announces [[July 2016 Facebook posts#I have grown a labia!|on Facebook]] that he has grown a labia using subliminal frequencies found on Youtube. He also requests donations for gender reassignment.
*26th - Three days after being barred from uploading videos to his CwcvilleGuardian Youtube account, Chris circumvents the ban by [[Paid Video Request Reminder|uploading to another account]], restarting the Paid Video Requests program and accepting offers for $10-$50.
*28th - Chris makes one sale on the video program.

===August===
<center><gallery>
File:Barb capitalone.png|Capital One Bank vs Barb
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>
*4th - Barb is sued by yet another bank. The hearing will take place on September 14th.
*5th - Chris pays $121 in court costs and fines for failing to acquire proper certifications for his dogs.
*5th - Chris begs for donations in [[August 2016 Facebook posts#House Cleaning|a Facebook post]] and asks for tubes of [[Oestrogel application and Vibrating Bra, How To.|Oestrogel]] to be sent to him.
*9th - Chris relists the Birthday Pikachu card on eBay for $500 and begs people to "Buy It Now and help me and my family."<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Buy this $3,000 VHS tape]]</ref> He also offers a VHS tape of Aladdin for $3,000.<ref>http://www.ebay.com/itm/282128626463</ref>
*11th - Chris begs [[Cole Smithey|Cole Smithey]] for financial help again, this time by saying, "Hey! Cole!!! Get off of your ass and apologize and make peace with us here, In Person, and Help Us Financially, Please."<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts|Get off your ass, Cole!]]</ref>
*31st - Chris begs his audience [[August 2016 Facebook posts#Who wants to pay our mortgage?!|on Facebook]] to pay his mortgage of $115,000.

===September===
<center><gallery>
File:Barb vs Capital One Bank result.png|Capital One Bank court ruling.
</gallery></center>
*12th - Chris is spotted and photographed at a [[Card Games#Toys "Я" Us|Toys "Я" Us]] buying two tins of Pokemon Cards, two days before his mother goes to court.
*14th - Greene County's court rules that Barb owes $15,906.99 in unpaid debt to Capital One bank.
*19th - Chris begs in [[September 2016 Facebook posts#Another new cat|a Facebook post]], while showing off his new pet cat. He wants money to cover bills for the second half of the month, one paragraph after stating that he needed "allowance fun" to get a break from [[stress]] in the first half of the month.
*27th - Chris claims in a [[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt|video]] that the "fickle finances" are improving for him and Barb, shortly before playing with his newly-bought Transformers toys, showing that he is unaware or does not care about the fact that his mother legally owes over $20,000 as a result of the two lawsuits filed against her in 2016 or that the property tax for their house will be due in two months.

===October===
*18th - Chris resumes begging in a [[I'm sick; we need money donations; no video requests for a while|video]], saying that he is sick and that he is running low on chicken noodle soup and money. Notably, he had spent $160 buying Transformers toys on Ebay in the weeks beforehand<ref>[[List of toys#Transformers: Titans Return]]</ref>.

===November===
<center><gallery>
File:Receipt for a penny - credit to Philosophy Phil.png|$0.01 donation
</gallery></center>

*18th - Chris spends $90 on Pokemon<ref>[[Twitter#Ticked off about Pokemon Sun]]</ref><ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Pokemon Sun and Moon networking]]</ref> and Transformers<ref>[[Twitter#More wish list demands]]</ref>.
*21st - The Chandlers pay the second half of their 2016 property tax for 14 Branchland Court, costing them $616.52<ref>[[:File:Propertytax2016paid.png]]</ref>.
*21st - Chris [[Help, please|makes another video]] to beg for donations again. He also [[Twitter#Help, please|posts]] to Twitter, saying, "We need more money, please. The Mortgage people are [[Kick the Autistic|kicking us again]]. Please send money to me via PayPal."
*22nd - Chris reacts to a penny donated by a troll<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-11-21-help-please.25958/page-6#post-1893900</ref>, [[Twitter#We need more than a penny|tweeting]], "We need Donations larger than a penny apiece. Please try to give us $10 or a Lot more than that."
*30th - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Barb pawns jewelry, Chris decides to join Patreon|posts]] that he will join [[Patreon]], after Barb had to pawn a necklace, which she had to sell at a significant loss for $325, to pay debts/bills.
*30th - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Another wish list update|updates]] his Christmas [[wish list]], to remove the $50 Transformers toy<ref>http://www.bigbadtoystore.com/bbts/product.aspx?product=HAS25156&mode=retail Chris mentioned this shop listing</ref>, named "Alpha Trion and Astrotrain," which he had bought. He does not pawn this, or any of his other toys, to help Barb; instead, he makes [[The Alpha Trion/"Young Warrior" Challenge|a video of himself playing with it]].

==Sources==
<references/>
[[Category:Sagas]]
[[Category:Things bought with taxpayer money]]

Financhu Crisis

2016-11-30T04:35:02Z

Yoshi89`: /* September */

[[File:Please, Donate (720p).mp400001.png ‎|thumb|400px|Chris's online activity for much of 2016]]
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Begging Counter}}

The '''Financhu Crisis''' is a term coined by users from [https://kiwifarms.net '''Kiwi Farms'''] to describe the steep decline in the Chandler family's financial management beginning in early [[2016]].

Signs of the Chandlers' worsening finances were made apparent by the increasing amounts of begging videos and donation requests on [[YouTube]] and [[FaceBook]].

Given that [[Barb]] is elderly on a [[tugboat|fixed income]], and [[Chris]] is [[stress|''lazy'']] on a fixed income, one could only bleakly speculate what will happen when Chris is eventually left to fend for himself once Barb is no longer around.

==Summary==

[[File:Financhu Wordle.png ‎|thumb|400px|A wordcloud of the videos and Facebook posts Chris made during the Financhu Crisis. Note how big "money" and "donations" are...]]
To this day, the Chandlers' financial woes are caused by their own irresponsible behaviors. Chris, [[Chris and money|learning absolutely nothing over the years]], has squandered any available money on [[Lego|children's toys]], [[PS4|video games]], [[McDonalds|fast food]], and [[sex toys]]. Barb, on the other hand, has simply been ignoring long-term debts and letting them pile up to alarming amounts.

'''Chris''' has made some half-assed efforts (but ''efforts'', nonetheless) to generate some income for the household over the past few years, which included opening an [[Etsy|Etsy shop]] and selling various possessions on [[eBay]]. The Etsy shop (started in 2015) proved to be a somewhat successful venture for Chris, as he made a fair amount of revenue out of butchering Nintendo Amiibos into makeshift Sonichu merchandise. These efforts would eventually be for naught, as Chris immediately spent the profits on expensive Lego sets as soon as he got the money. His Etsy shop eventually got shut down when he began to [[Stress|not fulfill new orders]] for months on end, likely due to him finding more interest in shameless begging for money online [[Chris and reality|in return for nothing]]. He then started listing a few items on eBay ([[Chris_and_negotiation#His_sales_on_eBay_and_Craigslist|demanding ridiculous prices]]), but achieved little profit with only managing to sell a rare Pokemon card or two. Chris has found some new success in acquiring donations from all of that e-begging, but like the profits from the Etsy store, the money immediately gets blown on [[toys]] and [[video games|games]].

'''Barb''' seems to have outstanding debt that would appear to dwarf Chris' financial handiwork. As of [[September 2016]], she faced lawsuits from Discover Bank and Capital One for failing to pay the large amounts of her credit card debt, according to Virginia District Court records. It is worth noting that it takes a lot of ignored [[Trolls|debt collector]] calls over a long period of time to get a simple credit card debt escalated to a lawsuit, suggesting that Barb may have been outright ignoring making any payments to her credit cards. Only time will tell if more creditor companies begin to sue Barb for her neglect. In [[August 2016]], Chris revealed that the household is still under a mortgage of $115,000, introducing a far more worrying debt looming over the horizon.

Both Chris and Barb continue to barely stay afloat with their lives thanks to their own [[tugboat]]s, but their lavish lifestyle of reckless spending will not last forever at this rate.

Despite it all, '''Chris has not once attempted to find a job'''.

==Outstanding Debts==
{{Incomplete}}

This table summarizes various unpaid debts charged to credit cards and other owed amounts between Chris and Barb over the course of the "Financhu Crisis". Keep in mind that these are only amounts found by [[CWCki|Christorians]] via Chris' Facebook posts and Virginia District Court public records. The Chandlers could likely be in deeper debt than we know.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|-
!data-sort-type="date"|Date
!data-sort-type="string"|Item
!data-sort-type="currency" |Amount
|-
|1 March 2016
|PS4 purchase (with credit card)
!style="text-align:right;" |$540.00
|-
|16 March 2016
|Discover Bank court case
!style="text-align:right;" |$4,706.93
|-
|April 2016
|Payday loan
!style="text-align:right;" |$3,000
|-
|31 August 2016
|Mortgage (revealed on Facebook)
!style="text-align:right;" |$115,000.00
|-
|14 September 2016
|Capital One court case
!style="text-align:right;" |$15,906.99
|- class="sortbottom"
!style="background-color:#E9E9E9; text-align:right;", colspan="2"|Grand Total
!style="font-weight:bold;color:#FF0000"|$139,153.92
|}

==Chris's toy expenses==
[[File:Had-to-pay-3fyhaf (credit to Gunslinger).png|thumb|300px|A recurring theme throughout the Crisis]]

This is a list of the known toy expenses Chris has made during the 2016 Financhu Crisis, collected from online postings. There are likely more which haven't been revealed, since Chris regularly goes to retail stores such as Toys R Us and Target.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Amount
! Toy(s) bought
|-
|$540
|PS4<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/internet-detective-proves-chris-bought-the-ps4-himself.18249/</ref>.
|-
|$500~
|31 games for the PS4. <ref>http://psnprofiles.com/Sonichu&completion=all&order=played&pf=ps4#content</ref> Many of those are franchise games, costing around $30-50, while a few are free downloads or micro-transactions.
|-
|$425.88
|A single Ghostbusters Lego set<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/</ref>.
|-
|$500~
|Transformers<ref>[[List of toys#Transformers: Titans Return]]</ref>
|-
|$90
|[[Waifu|Naru]]
|-
|$105+
|Skylanders<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_toys#Skylanders</ref>
|-
|$125~
|Pokemon<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_toys#Pokemon</ref>
|-
|$12.99
|Amiibos<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_toys#Nintendo_AmiibosM</ref>
|-
|$'''2,298.87'''
|'''Total'''
|}

==2016 Timeline==

===March===
*1st - Chris buys a PS4, worth $540, from Fingerhut (using a credit card)<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/internet-detective-proves-chris-bought-the-ps4-himself.18249/</ref>.
*16th - Barb is found guilty in a debt case involving Discover Bank. The judgement states that she owes $4,706.93<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/barb-sued-by-discover-bank.18379/page-28#post-1324090</ref>.
*19th - Chris spends $425 on a single Lego set<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/</ref>.

===April===
*12th - [[Please, Donate|Chris begs]]. This video is notable for being the first video devoted to asking for money.
*16th - It's revealed that Chris borrowed $3,000 from a payday loan<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-spent-over-425-on-ebay-last-month.19451/page-13#post-1392146</ref>.
*24th - [[Donation Request|Chris begs]] again, this time without offering crafts in exchange.

===May===
*4th - The donations listing on Chris's Etsy shop is removed, presumably for violating TOS<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/fb-4-29-chris-is-excited-about-ratchet-clank-totes-swag.20150/page-10#post-1434759</ref>.
*9th - Chris spends $60 on his [[waifu|waifu]].
*23rd - The Chandlers pay $616.52 for the first half of 14BC's 2016 [[:File:Property tax 2016 part1.png|property tax]].
*23rd - [[Donations, Please, plus Live Game Stream tonight.|Chris begs]] for bananas. He also [[Live Game Stream - Uncharted|announces]] the debut of a Support button on his Youtube channel to replace the Etsy listing.
*25th - Chris begs [[May 2016 Facebook posts#Etsy listing removal|in a Facebook post]] while reminding readers that Etsy removed his donation listing and that he has a Support button on Youtube instead.
*26th - Chris begs [[May 2016 Facebook posts#Uncharted video and donations|on Facebook]], links to his game stream of Uncharted and repeats his statements from the 25th.
*28th - Chris spends nearly $100 on Transformers<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/</ref>.
*29th - Chris spends another $30 on his waifu<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-8#post-1498444</ref>.
*31st - Chris spends $150 more on Transformers<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/updated-6-1-2016-chris-spent-100-on-transformers-five-days-after-begging-for-money.21201/page-6#post-1496692</ref>.

===June===
*8th - Chris's Etsy shop is closed<ref>[[Etsy#Shop Closure]]</ref>, presumably for failing to send orders.
*11th - [[Cwcville Shopping is on Vacation|Chris begs]] for money in the same video in which he announces that his shop is closed. Starting from this video, Chris adds his begging to the video descriptions.
*14th - Chris begs to have $100 for Barb's asthma medicine, in [[Donations Required, Serious. Please help|two]] [[Donations Requested, Please|videos]] which feature Barb.
*17th - [[Reading "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness" Chapter 1|Chris begs]] to have $200 for an electric bill, while reading a fanfic called "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness".
*19th - [[Reading "Unicorns, Rainbows, and a Bluebird of Happiness" Chapter 2|Chris begs]], again saying he wants $200 for an electric bill, and also wanting food money, while reading another chapter of Bluebird.
*19th - Chris wants to become a [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|prostitute]], in an attempt to get both money and china.
*26th - Chris begs his half-brother [[Cole Smithey|Cole Smithey]] for financial help, while simultaneously insulting him for "pissing and burning" the money he earns from working as a movie critic on apartment rent<ref>[[June 2016 Facebook posts#O brother, where art thou?]]</ref>.
*29th - [[Announcement 06292016|Chris begs]], saying that even though he got donations, he wants more because "we could still do better," before reading the third chapter of Bluebird.

===July===
*1st - Chris pays his $541 court costs for pepper-spraying a Gamestop employee in 2014<ref>https://kiwifar.ms/threads/7-1-chris-paid-his-court-costs.22142/</ref>.
*8th - [[Rainbows Unicorns and a Bluebird of Happiness Chapter 4|Chris begs]] while reading chapter four of Bluebird.
*9th - [[Announcement 20160709|Chris begs]] in a long rant, saying he is stressed from dealing with finances. He mentions a mortgage among the bills. He wants food money for himself, Barb and their pets.
*10th-11th - [[HELP, PLEASE!!!|Chris begs]] in a series of four videos, wanting $20 or $50. He demeans himself on camera to get people to donate. Finally, he thanks people for sending the "minimum $20" before begging to have money for Barb's teeth.
*13th - [[Donations Further Requested, Please|Barb begs]] to have money for her dental work.
*13th - Chris finally decides to sell some of his toys to raise money. He lists one Pokemon card on eBay for $50.<ref>[[July 2016 Facebook posts#Chris Offers a Pokemon Card for Sale]]</ref>
*14th - Chris lists two more Pokemon cards on eBay, for $100 each.
*15th - Chris begs for food money in a [[July 2016 Facebook posts#"I'm not on drugs!"|Facebook post]], complaining that people aren't willing to donate anymore.
*18th - [[Update 20160718|Chris begs]] for money in the same video in which he reads an anniversary dedication, while expecting to be paid $50 for it.
*18th - One of the $100 Pokemon cards Chris listed on eBay is sold<ref>http://offer.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewBidsLogin&item=282101638696</ref>.
*20th-22nd - Chris produces [[Paid Video Requests|eight videos]] to earn money from his fanbase.
*23rd - Chris returns to begging [[July 2016 Facebook posts#2 Strikes on Youtube|on Facebook]]. He also announces that "this window is for Donations Only. No video requests until further notice," after his Youtube account receives its second strike against it for violating policy on "nudity or sexual content" after [[Paid Video Requests#Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Shake my boobies|a video]] he uploaded on the 22nd got reported. He [[:File:Cwc-crayolasword-stitched.png|also begs]] to a Kiwi Farms user named crayolasword who asks him about the situation.
*24th - Chris announces [[July 2016 Facebook posts#I have grown a labia!|on Facebook]] that he has grown a labia using subliminal frequencies found on Youtube. He also requests donations for gender reassignment.
*26th - Three days after being barred from uploading videos to his CwcvilleGuardian Youtube account, Chris circumvents the ban by [[Paid Video Request Reminder|uploading to another account]], restarting the Paid Video Requests program and accepting offers for $10-$50.
*28th - Chris makes one sale on the video program.

===August===
<center><gallery>
File:Barb capitalone.png|Capital One Bank vs Barb
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>
*4th - Barb is sued by yet another bank. The hearing will take place on September 14th.
*5th - Chris pays $121 in court costs and fines for failing to acquire proper certifications for his dogs.
*5th - Chris begs for donations in [[August 2016 Facebook posts#House Cleaning|a Facebook post]] and asks for tubes of [[Oestrogel application and Vibrating Bra, How To.|Oestrogel]] to be sent to him.
*9th - Chris relists the Birthday Pikachu card on eBay for $500 and begs people to "Buy It Now and help me and my family."<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Buy this $3,000 VHS tape]]</ref> He also offers a VHS tape of Aladdin for $3,000.<ref>http://www.ebay.com/itm/282128626463</ref>
*11th - Chris begs [[Cole Smithey|Cole Smithey]] for financial help again, this time by saying, "Hey! Cole!!! Get off of your ass and apologize and make peace with us here, In Person, and Help Us Financially, Please."<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts|Get off your ass, Cole!]]</ref>
*31st - Chris begs his audience [[August 2016 Facebook posts#Who wants to pay our mortgage?!|on Facebook]] to pay his mortgage of $115,000.

===September===
<center><gallery>
File:Barb vs Capital One Bank result.png|Capital One Bank court ruling.
</gallery></center>
*12th - Chris is spotted and photographed at a [[Card Games#Toys "Я" Us|Toys "Я" Us]] buying two tins of Pokemon Cards, two days before his mother goes to court.
*14th - Greene County's court rules that Barb owes $15,906.99 in unpaid debt to Capital One bank.
*19th - Chris begs in [[September 2016 Facebook posts#Another new cat|a Facebook post]], while showing off his new pet cat. He wants money to cover bills for the second half of the month, one paragraph after stating that he needed "allowance fun" to get a break from [[stress]] in the first half of the month.
*27th - Chris claims in a [[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt|video]] that the "fickle finances" are improving for him and Barb, shortly before playing with his newly-bought Transformers toys, showing that he is unaware or does not care about the fact that his mother legally owes nearly $20,000 as a result of the two lawsuits filed against her in 2016 or that the property tax for their house will be due in two months.

===October===
*18th - Chris resumes begging in a [[I'm sick; we need money donations; no video requests for a while|video]], saying that he is sick and that he is running low on chicken noodle soup and money. Notably, he had spent $160 buying Transformers toys on Ebay in the weeks beforehand<ref>[[List of toys#Transformers: Titans Return]]</ref>.

===November===
<center><gallery>
File:Receipt for a penny - credit to Philosophy Phil.png|$0.01 donation
</gallery></center>

*18th - Chris spends $90 on Pokemon<ref>[[Twitter|Ticked off about Pokemon Sun]]</ref><ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Pokemon Sun and Moon networking]]</ref> and Transformers<ref>[[Twitter|More wish list demands]]</ref>.
*21st - The Chandlers pay the second half of their 2016 property tax for 14 Branchland Court<ref>[[:File:Propertytax2016paid.png]]</ref>.
*21st - Chris [[Help, please|makes another video]] to beg for donations again. He also [[Twitter#Help, please|posts]] to Twitter, saying, "We need more money, please. The Mortgage people are [[Kick the Autistic|kicking us again]]. Please send money to me via PayPal."
*22nd - Chris reacts to a penny donated by a troll<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-11-21-help-please.25958/page-6#post-1893900</ref>, [[Twitter#We need more than a penny|tweeting]], "We need Donations larger than a penny apiece. Please try to give us $10 or a Lot more than that."

==Sources==
<references/>
[[Category:Sagas]]
[[Category:Things bought with taxpayer money]]

Pmurt

2016-11-30T04:31:45Z

Yoshi89`: /* Death Threats */

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{quote|Plus, Trump is just too damn rich And [[Chris and hypocrisy|immature]]. And "Trump" spelled backwards is "Pmurt", which rhymes with "Hurt", and he would badly "Pmurt" this country in office.|[[Chris]]}}

{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | [[File:Trump.jpg]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Donald Trump
|-
| '''Nicknames'''
| Pmurt [[$50 for a video holiday greeting!|A Mean One]]
|-
| '''Date of Birth'''
| 14 June 1946 (age {{Age|1946|6|14}})
|-
| '''Gender'''
| [[Jerk|Male]]
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| [[Chris and race|White]]
|-
| '''Occupation(s)'''
| President-elect of the United States Businessman
|-
| '''Term'''
| 2017-
|-
| '''Preceded by'''
| [[Barack Obama]]
|-
|}

'''Pmurt''' is a [[CWC-ism]] for billionaire and 2016 Republican President-elect '''[[wikipedia:Donald Trump|Donald Trump]]''' (born [[Pre-1980#1940s|14 June 1946]]). He initially pronounced it '''Murt''', based on his opinion that the P is silent when the name is said backwards<ref>[[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt]]</ref>, however in [[Eid, Pmurt, Eid!!!]], he pronounced the P.

On 8 November 2016, Chris participated in the US presidential election and voted for Hillary Clinton<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Chris and Barb vote for Hillary]]</ref>. Following news that Trump had won the election, Chris reacted by making multiple death threats against him and Vice President-elect [[wikipedia:Mike Pence|Mike Pence]], which is actually against the [[law]].

==Meaning of the name==
This CWC-ism comes from a [[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote|Facebook comment from 25 September]] (partially quoted above), in which Chris says that "Trump spelled backwards is "Pmurt", [[Random Access Humor|which rhymes with hurt, and that Trump would badly "Pmurt" the US if elected.]]".

Reversing Trump’s name has twofold meanings. Firstly, names are particularly sacred to Chris<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref><ref>[[To Clyde Gregg]]</ref><ref>[[Exposing Jeff]]</ref>; in his eyes, mocking anyone's name will severely degrade them — this article will establish that Chris has enormous disdain for Donald Trump. Secondly, Chris has historically assumed that saying anything backwards induces subliminal stimuli<ref>[[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L]]</ref> — which he believe are enormously influential on the psyche ''and'' the physical body<ref>[[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis]]</ref>. Therefore, Chris may believe reversing Trump's name, in a negative context, might effectively alter his audience's perception of him. Beyond the random-access humor, Chris probably thinks his rendition of Trump’s name is a serious presidential objection for everyone to consider.

Chris continued using this backwards name in subsequent Facebook posts and videos.

==Chris's news sources==
On Facebook, Chris routinely browses pages on LGBTQ culture, such as Lizzy the Lezzy. In the wake of the 2016 election, many of those pages became inundated with articles written with a clear anti-Trump angle. Chris forms and reinforces his opinions on Trump based on those articles, rating many of them "Angry."

Examples of the pages Chris reacted to can be seen [https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot-www-facebook-com-2016-11-13-05-02-12-png.153431/ here] and [https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot-www-facebook-com-2016-11-13-19-08-04-png.153440/ here].

It's likely that Chris simply skims headlines or opening paragraphs. The second example was taken one hour after Chris posted to [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Hate and fear of Trump and Pence|a Lizzy the Lezzy comments section]]<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-11-13-chris-hates-and-fears-trump-and-pence.25777/page-2#post-1878273</ref>; given that he was also busy with responding to its readers, it is impossible for him to have thoroughly read the articles.

Chris has also [[Honor Roll|cited an episode of The Simpsons]] as one of his major sources for being anti-Trump<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote]]</ref>.

Interestingly, both Trump and Chris [[Megan|have been accused of sexual harassment]].

==Opposition to Trump==
Chris is opposed to Trump becoming President for the following reasons:

===On character===

*He "[[Chris and Hypocrisy|is very spiteful]]."<ref>[[July 2016 Facebook posts#Christine's Driver's License and Woman's Card]]</ref>

*He is an "[[Chris|immature brat]] who mocks everyone."<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote]]</ref>

*He "was a [[Autism|one-track tape]], [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|repeating himself]] [[Honor Roll|on pat [sic] deeds]] [[CADD|that he was "proud"(?)]] of."<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#"Thoughts" on the debate]]</ref>

*He is "[[Chris and anger|hot-headed]], [[Chris and money#Chris and impulse spending|impulsive]], [[Clyde Cash|orange-faced]], [[Chris and money#Barb's toxic influence|money-grubbing]], [[Barbara Chandler|double-dealing]], [[Chris and race|immigrant and race offensive]], and most offensive [on] [[Homos|the LGBTQ]]."<ref>[[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...]]</ref>

*He "[[Gal Pal E-mails 4#OkCupid - She's overweight and unappealing|puts down Women VERY BAD.]]"<ref>[[Misc E-mails#Anti-Pmurt]]</ref>

*His "[[Megan emails, 2008#Chris continues bothering her about ED|Womanizing and raping actions.]]"

*He is a [[Jerk|male]]. In February 2016, Chris said, "I feel like American [sic] needs a woman's touch finally after all these years"<ref>[[Update 02/16/2016]]</ref> as a reason for why he wanted Hillary Clinton [[Women's Rights|to become president.]] On 20 November, he stated Trump "is of SOO Many Typical Offensive MALE Stereotypes, he probably was born with Two damned "Y" Chromosomes instead of the usual "XY" pair."<ref>[[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...]]</ref>

*He is "[[Chris and Reality|Not Valid to be president.]]"<ref>[[Misc E-mails#Anti-Pmurt]]</ref>

===On the issues===

*He "Wants [[Chris and race|the immigrants to build their own "Keep Out" wall so [he] would kick them all out]]."<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote]]</ref>

*He has "ideals of [[Chris and money|cutting finances]] from all of the more important resources the country needs in communities and feeding the industries from the National Debt. And he acted against the immigrants in that topic as well; [[Monthly Tugboat|they have to work too, you know.]]"<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#"Thoughts" on the debate]]</ref>

*He "will ONLY make the Country go BROKE, as Groening predicted, and [[Chris and Money#Bank lawsuits against Barb|ALL the money will ONLY go to his own debtors]] and the Fat Cat Rich People, and [[Financhu Crisis|Hardly ANY for us in the middle class and below]]" and "Hillary will Tax the Fat Cats and fill the middle class and lower and get the country less in debt."<ref>[[Misc E-mails#Anti-Pmurt]]</ref>

===On issues relevant to Chris===

*LGBTQ

Chris is especially paranoid in his belief that Trump and Pence "hate" the LGBTQ<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote]]</ref>.

Chris has said he does "not just despise Trump and Pence, but as a Leabian Transwoman, and high-functioning autistic person, I fear, too, what would happen with those two God-damned jerks in the White House." In addition, he said, "I fear the loss of my own rights alongside our other LGBTQ community people's as well."<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Hate and fear of Trump and Pence]]</ref>

However, he has been vague in explaining ''why'' any policies they might implement would affect him. Chris does not face discrimination in the workforce, or in society ([[Chris and the Law|at least not from being transgender]]).

In reality, Trump has expressed liberal ideas on transgender issues. Chris is aware of this, yet refuses to give Trump credit, saying he is "most offensive to us in the LGBTQ communities, regardless of his Transgender bathroom choice statement."<ref>[[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...]]</ref>

Chris also criticized Pence, saying that "[[Chris and politics|Pence is just as much Anti LGBTQ and everything else that Trump is]], so my feelings are the same with that rat bastard as well, very much."<ref>[[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...]]</ref>

*The tugboat

He will not give Chris a bigger tugboat, and Chris is worried that he might even try to sink it.

On 14 November, he stated<ref>[[[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Lego Trump and Pence hanged at the gallows]]</ref>:

{{quotebox|they would drain money from [[Monthly Tugboat|SSI]], making my mother and I closer to broke.}}

In truth, what makes Chris and Barb closer to broke is ''[[Financhu Crisis|themselves]]''.

Chris has adamantly refused to budge on his anti-Trump positions. On 20 November, after radio silence following Lizzy the Lezzy readers and his Facebook friends criticizing him for his repeated death wishes, he said, "there is Nothing, nor any amount of time or whatever else, that would make it the cold day in the earth's core to Ever make me have even a remote inkling of a mystery wrapped in a riddle inside an enigma of any change of feeling or heart of mine about Trump ever."<ref>[[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...]]</ref>

==Anti-Trump petitions==
Chris has signed several online petitions in an effort to prevent Trump from assuming the presidency.

*[https://act.credoaction.com/sign/russell_amendment A petition opposing the "anti-LGBTQ Russell Amendment"]

{{quotebox|On January 20, Donald Trump and Mike Pence are going to enter the White House.

They campaigned on a platform of hatred, bigotry, racism, misogyny, and xenophobia...

...[The Russell Amendment] would reverse existing nondiscrimination protections for 28 million people in the federal contracting workforce. That means employers could fire someone or refuse to give them a job because they have a same sex partner, use birth control, are a single mother, are transgender or even simply don’t practice the same religion as their employer.}} Of course, Chris supported this petition—probably because it disparages Trump and references the transgender community. It's unlikely he actually read or understood its contents.

*[https://www.change.org/p/electoral-college-electors-electoral-college-make-hillary-clinton-president-on-december-19 A petition calling on the Electoral College to disregard the election and install Hillary Clinton into the presidency]

Chris also signed this petition, in the hopes that on 19 December 2016, the Electoral College would "ignore" the results of the 2016 Presidential election—since Clinton won the popular vote—and abolish the democratic process of the United States. This will almost certainly not happen.

[[Image:Feelings of the election results (720p 30fps H264-192kbit AAC).mp400001.png|thumb|Chris, wishing for Donald Trump's death.]]

==Death Threats==
Chris's hatred of Trump is so great that he made four videos of himself role-playing acts of violence on him with ''[[Transformers]]'', ''[[My Little Pony]]'' and ''[[Lego]]'' toys, with two of those occurring before the election.<ref>[[September 2016 Paid Video Requests#Paid Message to the Trolls]]</ref><ref>[[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt]]</ref>, including one where he destroyed [[List of toys#Transformers: Titans Return|a Transformers toy]], further showing his lack of [[Chris and money|financial]] [[Financhu Crisis|sense]].

[[Image:Legotrumppence.jpg|thumb|Trump and Pence depicted being murdered in Lego form by Chris, part of a line of his perceived enemies who have been the subject of his [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Voodoo-Wise|voodoo-magic]] [[Gal Pal E-mails 4#OkCupid and Impotent Rage|revenge fantasies]].]]

'''Timeline'''

On 9 November 2016, Chris began making several enraged [[death threats]] against the President-elect. He continued his tirade in the following days, adding Vice President-elect Mike Pence to his death prayers on 10 November, in spite of the possibility that it could land him in serious legal trouble. According to [http://uscode.house.gov/view.xhtml?path=/prelim@title18/part1/chapter41&edition=prelim United States code], a threat against the President-elect is punishable by a fine and/or a maximum of five years in prison.

Chris has gotten himself into [[Chris and the law|legal trouble]] multiple times in the past, to the point that he has six misdemeanors on his record, with four of those stemming from assault crimes. He is also having [[Financhu Crisis|financial trouble]]. Only time will tell how far Chris pushes his luck with his repeated calls for Trump and Pence to die.

'''9 November'''

*3:28 am - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Chris wants Trump assassinated|posts on Facebook]] that he wants someone to assassinate Trump with a sniper rifle. Chris's Twitter account automatically tweets the post. Throughout the day, many [[Chris in the media#Death threats against Trump|high-profile Twitter users]] retweet the post. Several Twitter users say that they reported him to the FBI and Secret Service.<ref>http://archive.is/bHnGQ</ref>

*3:39 am - Chris [[Eid, Pmurt, Eid|uploads a YouTube video]] depicting him smashing a ''Transformers'' toy in effigy of Trump, while screaming "die!"

*3:40 am - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Eid, Pmurt, Eid!!!|posts on Facebook]] again. He links to the YouTube video and says Trump "should Die now" before taking office. The post is also tweeted by his Twitter account.

*5:15 am - The "sniper rifle" death threat disappears from Facebook<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-calls-for-the-assassination-of-our-dear-leader.25664/page-4#post-1865911</ref>.

*8:30 am - An Infowars.com [http://www.infowars.com/hillary-supporters-burn-american-flag-riot-threaten-to-kill-trump-after-losing-election/ article], featuring Chris's death threat in tweet form, is published.

*11 pm - The same threat disappears from Twitter<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-calls-for-the-assassination-of-our-dear-leader.25664/page-14#post-1869300</ref>.

'''10 November'''
*4:07 am - Chris [[Twitter#10 November 2016.1|tweets]] the Infowars article.

*4:23 am - Chris [[Twitter#10 November 2016.2|tweets]] that he wants his audience to join him in wishing death to President-elect Trump before January 2017.

*6:53 pm - Chris again [[Twitter#10 November 2016.3|tweets]] to pray for Trump's death. He also prays for Vice President-elect Mike Pence's death. He then links to [https://act.credoaction.com/sign/russell_amendment a petition] from Credo Action, concerning the "anti-LGBTQ Russell Amendment."

'''13 November'''
*2:06 am - Chris [[Feelings of the election results|uploads a YouTube video]] in which he uses Legos to role-play Mike Pence murdering Trump and getting arrested. He then holds up a sheet of paper, with the handwritten words (backwards and facing himself):

<center>{{quotebox|(Before January 2017) Die, Trump, die, or by illness, by Mike Pence's hand.}}</center>

*2:36 am - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Feelings of the election results|posts on Facebook]] about being annoyed by leftover Trump/Pence campaign signs. It is unknown whether or not Chris will [[Sonic Boom Protests|take down the signs himself]].

*5:06 am - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Feelings of the election results|posts on Facebook]], linking to the Infowars article. He then tries to justify his behavior by saying, "I'm not the only one who wants him dead."

*9:17 pm - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Hate and fear of Trump and Pence|posts]] to the Lizzy the Lezzy comment section, asking the readers to pray for Trump and Pence's deaths "before Thanksgiving." Many people respond, trying to talk sense into him, to no avail.

'''14 November'''
*12:53 pm - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Lego Trump and Pence hanged at the gallows|posts a picture to Facebook]] depicting Lego versions of Trump and Pence being executed by hanging, while handcuffed. The text on the photo reads:

<center>{{quotebox|Die, Trump, Die. Die, Pence, Die.

We do not want either of you in office; jail for you both is unlikely; We, the LGBTQ community, do not want to lose our protection and rights}}</center>

*1:16 pm - Chris follows up by commenting that, since prison is "unlikely" and impeachment is "difficult" then "Death upon those two before January, 2017, at this time and point is a necessary evil."

*3:07 pm - Chris [[November 2016 Facebook posts#I'm done adulting|posts]], saying "[[Chris and reality|Trump is Not president, mayor, or Anything in Cwcville.]]"

*7:30 pm - The execution-by-hanging post, and the associated comments, disappears from Facebook.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-14-16-chris-simulates-murder-with-legos.25791/page-7#post-1880108</ref>

'''15 November'''

*10:44 pm - Chris [[I Tweet AND Post Simultaneously|announces]] Facebook had temporarily banned him from posting for a week.

'''20 November'''

*5:00 am - Chris, in [[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...|a 22-tweet long rant]], makes several childish insults and says he had given his "issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified." He ends his rant by complaining about Twitter's 140-character limit.

===Chris on his death threats===
Chris has attempted to rationalize his constant calls for Trump and Pence's deaths and to reconcile his violent attitude with him being "bothered" that he has to "resort to death wishing on Anyone."<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Lego Trump and Pence hanged at the gallows]]</ref>

After Chris suggested to the readers of Lizzy the Lezzy (a LGBTQ Facebook page) to wish death on Trump and Pence, they instead criticized him for saying such "stupid" things.

One person said, "wishing death on people you don't like doesn't exactly make you look like a better person in comparison." Chris replied by saying that, with Trump and Pence in office, it would then be difficult to "impeach them and get Hillary in."<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Hate and fear of Trump and Pence]]</ref>

Chris has shifted on how he wants Trump to die. Upon learning of the election results, he wanted someone to kill Trump with "a sniper rifle."<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Chris wants Trump assassinated]]</ref> The next day, he asked [[Chris and religion|God]] to do it<ref>[[Twitter#10 November 2016.2]]</ref>. Days later, he wanted Mike Pence to murder him<ref>[[Feelings of the election results]]</ref>. He also believes it's possible that Trump will die from old age before inauguration day<ref>[[Feelings of the election results]]</ref>, and that Clinton would not, since "Men die earlier than women.<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Hate and fear of Trump and Pence]]</ref>" Inexplicably, Chris also wants "science" to kill Trump.<ref>[[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...]]</ref>

Chris has considered the notion of Trump and Pence going to prison, but has concluded that "Prison is unlikely for them, how difficult impeachment is, what other option is there?" He believes Trump should be jailed "for all of his [[Emily|sexual]] [[Catherine|assaults]] and rape on women."<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Lego Trump and Pence hanged at the gallows]]</ref>

He would prefer for Trump and Pence to simply hand over their democratically-elected positions, saying to "give the role of President, with most civil grace to Hillary Clinton. And since that is most bloody unlikely of Trump, ever, I am still most pained to continue having to pray for Trump's and Pence's Deaths to happen Before January, 2017, by someone else's hands or illness."<ref>[[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...]]</ref>

Due to his [[Autism|stubbornness]], Chris has refused to budge from his anti-Pmurt positions, even after Lizzy the Lezzy's readers ''and'' his Facebook friends criticized him for his repeated death threats. On 20 November, he stated, "I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified..." He followed by saying, "As much as I would like to choose to be rednecked and stubborn enough to plead complete ignorance and utter denial of him and Pence not only on the verge of taking office, there is still too many damn visuals about the bastards that plain further frustrate and upset me."<ref>[[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...]]</ref>

Unfortunately for Chris, he simply forms his opinions via skimming clickbait articles whose authors are highly biased against Trump. Due to his [[Announcement 06292016|untreated autism]], he does not attempt to do a more objective analysis. Instead, he has effectively become brainwashed on matters that he was not equipped to fully understand in the first place, to the point that he believes that "Death upon those two before January, 2017, at this time and point is a necessary evil.<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Lego Trump and Pence hanged at the gallows]]</ref>"

==See Also==
* [[Chris and English]]
* [[Death Threats]]

==Sources==
<references/>
{{People}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]
[[Category:Politics]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

Chris and the law

2016-11-30T04:25:00Z

Yoshi89`: /* 2016 */

{{DeadLinks}}
{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Image:116-CWCCop.jpg|thumb|Chris always keeps a watchful eye out for criminal scum who would dare steal his already-stolen characters.]]

'''Laws''' are rules established by a society to protect its members and ensure the orderly function of society. Their observance is usually maintained by [[Jerkop|law enforcement]] and penalties are placed on those who disobey the laws.

For [[Chris]], however, these just serve as another deterrent in his endless [[Love Quest|quest]] for [[china]] and a weapon with which to threaten his real and supposed enemies.

==Understanding==
{{quote|I have been giving him reasons since the police came in June of [[2008]], and nothing has sunken into that [[Hello, Juffalo|clown head]] of his.|[[Michael Snyder]]<ref><s>[http://www.youtube.com/all_comments?v=6odVsyr3I40]</s> (the video is fine, but that comment is no longer present as of Jun 2014)</ref>}}

[[Image:Impliedshooting.jpg|thumb|left|Violence is [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|Comic Chris]]'s usual solution to law enforcement.]]

Like his grip on [[Chris and reality|reality]], Chris's understanding of the law is tenuous at best, and dangerously [[naïve]] at worst. Chris legitimately believes trolling is illegal. He regularly threatens internet [[trolls]] with legal action, and makes no distinction in severity between a troll [[Ivy Q&A|threatening violence]] against Chris and a troll uploading a harmless picture of [[Rosechu]] with a [[pickle]] to the Internet. As a matter of fact, Chris himself is prone to making [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|extremely violent threats]], such as [[Sign Destruction Video|threatening to murder]] [[Vivian Gee]] and her entire family because of her creating the [[audiobooks]]. He's done everything from calling the police to convincing his father to write to then-President [[George W. Bush]] in an attempt to get rid of his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page. He has even poorly attempted to impersonate the President in a hilarious attempt to convince the trolls at ED to take down his page,<ref><s>http://encyclopediadramatica.se/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=prev&oldid=1997405266</s> (dead link as of Jun 2014)</ref> and has attempted to contact current President, [[Barack Obama]], to stop people from posting gay ads. Chris also believes that the laws in [[CWCville]] and the laws stated in ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' should be enforced ''in real life.''<ref>[[Mailbag 55#Draconian fun!]]</ref>

Chris himself doesn't have much respect for laws and rules, particularly when [[Chris and hypocrisy|their enforcement inconveniences him]]. During his time at [[Target]], he saw nothing wrong with exploiting the free refill policy and loitering for hours at a time in a privately-owned establishment while harassing female customers and apparently [[Attraction Sign|soliciting hanky-panky]]. Chris often remarks that his [[Virgin with rage|emotional state]] entirely justifies his actions, stating in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]] that he should be excused for disturbing the peace by literally screaming "NOOOOOOO!" loudly in the middle of a crowded mall.<ref>[[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2: Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart"]]</ref>

Self-contradictory as ever, though, Chris's disregard of many laws does not stop him from rigidly observing others, often with completely skewed priority: In [[Sonichu Special 4]], his cartoon avatar makes a point of obeying the speed limit - while on his way to confront [[Liquid Chris]] and assault him with a [[Megatron pistol|deadly weapon]]. In a [[May 2010]] video, Chris states that he believes a man who brutally beat his girlfriend to death with his bare hands deserved twenty years in prison for his crimes, which is just twice the penalty he wants for [[Tobacky|smoking one cigarette]].<ref>[[05142010]]</ref>

In addition, Chris has very little respect for those who enforce the law:

{{quote|Verbal Combat had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “[[Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha]]s.” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off.|Excerpt from Chris's [[CWC's Diary|diary]]}}

The above quote pretty much defines Chris's attitude towards law enforcement officials. He feels that it is completely appropriate to flip off, insult, and [[lie]] to people who are simply doing their jobs. And, of course, as any rational person would understand, running away from law enforcement officials is a seriously bad idea. Chris is truly a rebel without a cause (or effect).

The correspondence with Jackie revealed that in the trial on the Target incident, Chris thought that his work with the [[The GAMe PLACe#Chris the TCG gamer|Pokémon TCG League]] let him off the hook.<ref>[[Jackie e-mails Part 2#Chris lies about The Game Place]]</ref> In reality, the court probably acquitted him either on a technicality or insufficient evidence. Chris probably mentioned the volunteer work because he believed a person's merits, no matter how unrelated, would automatically make one innocent of all charges. It is also telling that he recounted the charge as "Soliciting", whereas the actual charge was "Disorderly Conduct"; he feels that he was only persecuted because of his [[Love Quest]] efforts, and not because he was tard raging.

Of interesting note, is that contrary to Chris's [[Women's rights|general]] [[Homos|political]] [[Niggos|views]], he seems to be in favor - or at least accepting of - gun control legislation.<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref> Whether or not he has a firm understanding of what he's saying, we'll likely never know.

Interestingly, Chris seems to have a ''very'' skewed view of the idea of "self-defense", which is exemplified with the acquisition of pepper spray. Pepper spray, like most defensive weapons, should be used as a last resort, to keep people from attacking you. As seen with the [[26 December 2014|GameStop attacks]], Chris uses it as a means to keep anyone he doesn't like away. Using that event as an example, the man he sprayed wasn't even near him and Chris decided to spray a quick spritz on his chest without any provocation. It got worse when, days later, he began a commotion in a [[Walmart]] using the device. To Chris, it's the ultimate troll and Jerkop deterrent, when in actuality, he's waving around assault charges on a stick.

==Legal troubles==
The following is a list of incident Chris had with the law. This list may not be complete; in a telephone conversation with [[Ivy]] in 2009, [[Bob]] told her that Chris had in the past six or seven incidents with the law,<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#The end]]</ref> and yet this article lists only three incidents that precede 2010.

===2004===
On [[Twin Falling Towers|11 September]] [[2004]], Chris was detained at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]] for loitering, and continually arguing with the staff over a number of months. The incident is depicted in [[Sub-Episode 1]]. Chris was banned from returning to the mall on his own and without his parents' company. However, it appears that this ban was lifted or ignored soon afterward.

===2005===
On 20 July [[2005]], Chris was charged with disorderly conduct<ref name="2005 Disorderly Conduct">[[:File:20050720-GC05009339-00.png|Disorderly conduct charge, 20 July 2005]]</ref> and trespassing<ref name="2005 Trespassing">[[:File:20050720-GC05009340-00.png|Trespassing charge, 20 July 2005]]</ref> at Target, as depicted in [[Sub-Episode 7]] and [[Sub-Episode 8]]. After 2 hearings,<ref name="2005 Disorderly Conduct" /><ref name="2005 Trespassing" /> prosecutors chose to drop the case and Chris was not punished.

5 days later, Chris caused an auto accident when he followed another car too closely and rear-ended it. This went to court on 12 September 2005.<ref name="2005 Following Too Close">[[:File:20050728-GT05011195-00.png|Following too close, 28 July 2005]]</ref> He was fined $30 and had to pay $56 in court costs.

===2010===
Chris's various run-ins at [[The GAMe PLACe]] have resulted in the cops being called on him a couple times. At least once after Chris called in his parents after he was initially banned from the location and tried to weasel his way back in, and again when he trespassed on the property, though he wasn't charged with anything on either occasion.<ref>[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]</ref>

On 4 [[June 2010]], Chris made yet another pilgrimage to The GAMe PLACe. Chris was armed with his camera, and while Mike was concerned that Chris wanted pictures of his daughter for [[Mass debating|disturbing reasons]], Chris maintains that he merely wanted a picture of Mike [[Death threats|for use as]] [[CWC is Angry|a dartboard]]--still disturbing, but in entirely different ways. Chris was caught in the parking lot despite trying to run away, and was questioned by the police, who made him delete the pictures he had taken, and basically told him to quit his shit. Chris made his [[6 June 2010]] video in response to these events.

===2011===
In a [[May 2011]] [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] post, Chris said that he has begun to use the ladies' restroom at his local mall while dressed in drag; he recounts an incident in which ''"a woman complains and tattles on me, and a [[JERK|stereotypical Brute male]] shouts me out. I felt embarassed. [sic] When in skirt, I am still gonna go to the Ladies, because there is no goin' back for me."'' This supposed brute male may or may not have been with mall security.

In his [[Calling Out|3 new videos]] posted after an 8-month-long hiatus from YouTube he tries to do something which some viewers of ''The Chandler Show'' believe to be blackmail. Chris admitted it by typing word ''blackmail'' in tags for last of them; however trolls hoping for a lawsuit [[saga]] shouldn't get their hopes up, because it's unlikely any of the trolls threatened by it would want to report him, given that they've all been trying to get him back onto the internet for months and wouldn't want to drive him off again. Not to mention Chris probably doesn't have anything on them at all. Note that under Virginia law, his demands are more likely to be considered extortion (still a class five felony) rather than blackmail.

In the same video, Chris also point blank accused Mike of molesting his own daughter, all while admitting that he doesn't have any concrete proof of his allegation. Given how prone he is to accusing others of slandering him (like pointing out his bad qualities that are extremely evident to everyone but Chris), Chris's accusations are very hypocritical. If Mike did want to sue Chris in civil court, he would indeed have a case against him as Chris's allegations are textbook defamation. However, it's questionable what Snyder would win in litigation, aside from a [[PlayStation 3]] and numerous children's [[toys]].

On [[28 October 2011]], Chris ended up in the worst possible scenario, netting a felony charge and 2 misdemeanors in what appears to be a ''3rd'' attempt to enter the GAMe PLACe. It appears that the Virginia justice system had finally run out of patience.

As a direct result of his October 28 run in with Michael Snyder, Chris had found both himself and [[Barb|his mother]] on the receiving end of a civil suit. Having been sentenced to community service and put under a probation, and being charged with paying Snyder's medical bills, this may very well have been the first time that he has felt ramifications for his accusations and threats. However, it is much more likely that he simply [[Chris and his Ego|doesn't care]], or still feels as if he were the [[Kick the Autistic|real victim]] in all of this.

===2012===
[[File:Card.PNG|thumb]]

On 4 [[February 2012]], it was revealed on his [[Facebook]] that Chris no longer has respect for ''any'' sort of law enforcement after the events of 28 October 2011, officially deeming everyone who upholds the law a Jerkop. At the same time, he revealed another encounter with the boys in blue that day. As he attempted to pass out fliers while at the mall, encouraging others to stay away from the GAMe PLACe, two Jerkops (or as Chris puts it, "a Jerkop and an accomplice") approached him. Despite the officers simply wanting to talk to him and letting him know he wasn't in any trouble, Chris's paranoia kicked in and he ran. While the story Chris gives seem to hint that the officers just wanted to tell him to knock off the distribution of fliers, Chris believed otherwise, citing that one of them called out his name and making him think they wanted to post another encounter with him on the Internet. He escaped by diving into a Mitsubishi, most likely replacing the dying piece of scrap that is [[Son-Chu]], and driving off.

On the 12th April, Chris [[Virgin with rage#No longer a virgin (No word on the rage)|announced the loss of his virginity]], giving off strong hints that he had slept with a hired prostitute. He all but [[Facebook#Hey.2C_Trollies|confirmed this]] on 1 May, when he said that he 'found her on the backpage', most likely meaning that he found it on the website Backpage.com, a Craiglist clone that also solicits prostitutes--Chris's prostitute was codenamed [[Mia Hamm]], as seen on the website. In the state of Virginia, this constitutes a Class 1 Misdemeanor and is therefore illegal. It is unknown whether or not Chris is aware of this, but it's very likely that if he is, he simply doesn't care.

On 28 [[April 2012]], Chris revealed another incident in the mall. Prior to his Facebook note on 30 [[March 2012]], Chris got into a shouting match with a troll on his cell phone at the mall. The shouting did not go unnoticed, and Chris bolted once security was called in. On 25 April, Chris received a ban from the mall,<ref>[[Facebook#Maniacal Laughter from Who now? Oh, wait, It Is ME! >8D]]</ref> though it is unknown if it was for that incident or an incident that happened between those two dates.

On 10 [[July 2012]], Chris was arraigned in court for the 28 October 2011 incident. After calling Snyder a "thieving liar" in the courtroom, Chris was sentenced to community service and put under a one-year probation. He was also ordered to pay Snyder's medical bills.

===2013===

In September 2013, Chris committed an act of vandalism (an arrestable offense) by defacing a [[HEXbox]] One display at a Walmart, but got off easy by merely just being banned from the store. Given his furious reaction to this and his track record with a certain store owner who also did the same, it remains to be seen if Chris would follow up on his threat to have his revenge. Also, much like his tantrum at the [[Fashion Square Mall]] in 2005, Chris was also confronted by a jerkop at a local restaurant after scratching a woman's car with his, and screaming out loud in public. Chris claimed he was [[Chris and religion|cursing God for all his misfortune recently]].

===2014===

On 29 [[March 2014]], a report surfaced on the [[CWCki Forums]] saying that earlier that month Chris has been spotted trying to steal merchandise from [[Best Buy]]. The next day Chris denied the truthfulness of the report, but [[Kim]] confirmed that the attempted shoplifting had indeed occurred.<ref>[[March 2014 Facebook Posts#Rumour]]</ref>

On [[26 December 2014]], Chris vandalized a Sonic Boom display in GameStop in the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]] and was forced out due to a previous ban, but not before he attacked a staff member with pepper spray who was calling security. By the 28th, he was confirmed to have been jailed.

===2015===
Thoughout most of 2015 Chris behaved himself, presumably because his sojourn to the jailhouse was fresh in his memory. His punishment for the pepper spray incident was eventually decided (after '''seven''' hearings) in October - a very light sentence of a three-figure fine and a six-month prison sentence that he won't have to serve unless he breaks the law again during probation.

===2016===
<center><gallery>
File:Dogcourtcase2.png|Chris fined - No county dog tag 2
File:Dogcourtcase1.png|Chris fined - No rabies certificate 2
</gallery></center>

In August, Chris was fined $121 by Greene County for two charges, each misdemeanors, of failing to acquire dog tag and rabies licenses for his dogs.

In November, Chris made several death threats against president-elect [[Pmurt|Trump]]. He is blissfully unaware that threatening the president or president-elect is one of the few restrictions on freedom of speech in America, and could land Chris with a fine and/or up to five years in prison.

==Chris's parents and law==

It's not hard to figure out why Chris thinks the law should serve him and him alone. His parents, too, have the same problem.

* When Chris was thrown out of the [[Wikipedia:Cub Scouting (Boy Scouts of America)|Cub Scouts]] after an [[autism|unknown incident]], his parents attempted to sue the [[Wikipedia:Boy Scouts of America|Boy Scouts of America]] for [[Kick the Autistic|discrimination]].<ref>[[Mailbag 18]]</ref>
* When Chris threw a tantrum that required him to be restrained, Bob attempted to ''sue the school for restraining him''.<ref><s>[http://208.210.219.132/stars/mainmenu.jsp;jsessionid=0000XHMY2MEVFIV0HN4N1CX0EQA:ulnfn1uq], case 0438-94-2</s> (dead link as of Jun 2014)</ref>
* When [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] took a picture of Chris and uploaded it to the Internet, Chris's parents threatened them with legal action (but as usual never followed through).
* When [[Snorlax]] thought she had indigestion, she acted like she was going to sue the Chinese establishment the food came from. When it turned out to be [[Wikipedia:colitis|colitis]], she dropped the subject.
* When Barb and Bob had their absurd case against Greene County used against them, their first reaction was to run to another county.<ref>[[Greene County Conspiracy]]</ref>
* When [[Alec]] called the Chandler household posing as [[The GAMe PLACe]] employee Matthew Noble, [[Borb]] claimed that taking pictures of somebody without their knowledge or consent was "not illegal." This came after threatening to sue Mimms and Lucas for doing exactly that.<ref name="Matthew Noble call">[[Matthew Noble call]]</ref>
* During that same call, Bob simply won't have a bar of the concept that an individual can be prohibited from private property, saying, "it's a business place," which has absolutely no bearing on private property laws.<ref name="Matthew Noble call"/>
* On 28 October 2011, Barb was arrested for not only fleeing the scene of an accident, but also felony assault on a police officer, a crime that a remotely sensible person would never commit due to the serious consequences attached to it (mandatory minimum of six months' imprisonment on conviction); however, the recent death of her husband, her age, her bad health and her hopeless, dependent clod of a son seem to have helped earn her some clemency.
*On 10 [[July 2012]], Barb was arraigned in court for her participation in the 28 October 2011 incident. She was sentenced to community service and served a two year probation.

<center><gallery>
File:Barb discover bank result.png|Discover Bank vs Barb
File:Barb vs Capital One Bank result.png|Capital One Bank vs Barb
</gallery></center>

*On 19 [[February 2016]], Barb was sued by Discover Bank for unpaid debt. The judgement stated that the owes $4,706.93 and $56 in court costs.
*On 4 [[August 2016]], Barb was sued by Capital One Bank for the same reason. She owes $15,906.99, plus $56 in court costs.

==Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws==
[[Image:AL cover.gif|thumb|Where Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws come from.]]
Chris believes the police in real life are corrupt, and sees them in the same light as he sees the Jerkops in his comic- the Jerkops act as a stand-in for police who wronged him, and are portrayed as being impostors with no legal authority (probably indicating that Chris does not recognize real policemen as legitimate authority). In light of these things, Chris has his own spin on the law. The penalties for [[Alcohol|drinking]], smoking and internet harassment involve physical violence including a "Kick in the Teeth" which Chris inexplicably portrays as a punch in the first and only of his supposed series of Q&A videos.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008|the only one]]</ref>

On 31 [[December 2009]], Chris orated about a law he wanted made in order to prevent [[Jack Thaddeus]] from using the ad space he paid for:

{{quote|I Have The Instinct, and I Have Already [[CWC-ism|Snail-Mailed]] President Barack Obama on how this sort of bad advertisement is going on and how it is Wrong and should be made Illegal. On HOW if the Main Captain does not WANT or IS OFFENDED with the listed Ads within his own Website or Works, REGARDLESS of who controls the AdSpace, WOULD REMOVE THOSE ADS or face JAILTIME. And the F.B.I. would be FULLY INVOLVED in all this, and THEY have the Power, Tools and Balls to seek, hunt down and bring in the Individual Internet Trolls and Ad-Spammers.|Chris}}

As one can see, Chris is seeking the direct intervention of the president of his country and beseeching him to [[Chris and reality|outlaw advertisements he doesn't like.]] Aside from the fact that Obama himself couldn't have done anything about this, the fact is that Chris was mandated by law to display the ads Jack paid to display. Chris should have written to his congressman about this rather than the president, but either way he would have received no response.

This attitude is also reflected on his relationship with [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. [[2003|More than a decade ago]], she put a stop to Chris [[Love Quest#Conflicts with Mary Lee Walsh|soliciting sex]] on her campus. [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|War ensued]] and Chris received a well-deserved [[Autism papers|time-out]] for [[Chris and anger|his behaviour]]. Six years later, in [[2009]], Chris decided it was time to make peace. He went to her office and left her a [[:File:Apology to Mary Lee.jpg|"Framed Hand-Drawn Apology"]] on her doorstep.<ref>[[One Blessing, and One Curse|out of the blue]]</ref> Her reaction was to file a trespassing notice. Chris disastrously believed that since he didn't read the letter and returned it to sender, he wasn't liable for it.<ref>[[Mailbag 26]]</ref> Thankfully, Chris didn't trespass again.

[[Mailbag 55]] posits a few more original laws: one, that it should be illegal for [[JERKS|men]] to ever show their [[Reldnahc|bare chest]] (because, according to Chris, no one in the entire world ever wants to see a man's bare chest, presumably disregarding [[women]], [[Homos|gay men]] and boxing enthusiasts), and two, he wants to [[Women's rights|force all women]] in any kind of relationship to wear rings (purely for his own benefit of course), thus defeating all symbolism and significance of them.

In the aftermath of distancing himself from the Internet, Chris began to formulate a new law, the "Bill for Anti Online Bad-Mouthing," starting with his second [[Flipnote Hatena|Flipnote]], [[Don'tGetTrolled!]]. The details are unknown, but Chris essentially wants to make so that online, nobody can ever speak negatively of anybody else under threat of prosecution. There do exist laws against cyber-crime and online harassment but these laws vary by country (and concern rather more serious deeds than drawing [[Rosechu]] with a dick), and so even if Chris's law were somehow implemented federally, only his fellow USA residents would actually be held accountable. Chris is failing to comprehend that people besides Americans use the internet, or worse, assuming the entire world can be held to the USA's laws.

==In the comic==
[[File:0862-Cwcville11.JPG|right|thumb|[[CWCville]] used to have a police station, but no more.]]
The law, such as it is, in the comics is a horrifying totalitarianism where anybody anywhere is subject to the whims of a dictator. In CWCville, Chris is "mayor" (read: god-king) and has banned a number of things in his city. Smoking or drinking alcohol would lead one to be either sentenced to ten years in prison or a US$1,500 fine (which Chris [[Chris and Money|considers an equally bad punishment]]. CWCville has its own currency (despite being nothing more than a small city) and why fines are levied in USD is unknown.<ref name="Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008">[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> Importing tobacco or alcohol incurs a greater punishment than murder or rape.<ref name="Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008"/> However, it should be noted that Chris [[Rollin' and Trollin'|repealed the law against alcohol]] in [[June 2009]].

The Rosechus often congregate to "protest" for women's rights. These protests usually involve nudity and/or pornography. They campaign for basic, archaic things like eligibility to vote, suggesting Chris (or one of his predecessors) has imposed discriminating laws against women in CWCville.

It is never clear whether or not CWCville is legally a part of the United States (and thus subject to its federal laws) as Chris characteristically sends mixed messages a lot - some things are distinctly American (the aforementioned USD fines, for instance) but CWCville has its own currency, and its own set of "laws", the likes of which would never be permitted in a developed or even undeveloped country, even if CWCville were some sort of Vatican-like sovereign state. The only arrangement that makes even the slightest amount of sense is that CWCville is just that - a sovereign state, on US soil. Chris doesn't seem to have thought this out though, and evidently believes the mayor of a town is legally entitled to act as an authoritarian dictator.

As a mayor, Chris does nothing bureaucratic, ever, and makes [[Allison Amber|his secretary]] do all the paperwork (as per his thoughts on women) while he goes off on another one of his sweetheart searches. He has mandated "[[dating education|Dating Education]]" classes for students so that they can learn to go on dates, as well as how to "stay straight."

[[List of Sonichu characters#Constables Gerald Grant and Louis Perez|Actual police officers]] did not appear until [[Sonichu 10|quite late]] in the series and even then, they did nothing whatsoever, giving the impression that Chris and his [[Pokémon]] abominations are the only thing standing between peace and violent anarchy. However, [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu #9'']] seems to reveal that there are three sets of "other" protectors: a (possibly) nondescript police force (distinct from [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s [[jerkops]]), as well as his own team of [[Power Rangers]] and a team of [[Transformers]].

{{quote|Is CWCville under Martial Law?|[[Jack Thaddeus]] citing the truth as he sees it}}

In conversation with [[Jack Thaddeus]], Chris revealed that CWCville is the home of a paramilitary force equipped with tanks which he uses as a "Police Force", and all his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] enjoy immunity from prosecution and are above the law.<ref>[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3]]</ref> Add this to the fact that Chris cannot be deposed as mayor ("there [[Chris and English|is]] no elections") and the fact that the police and a fleet of superpowered goons obey literally anything Chris demands of them, and it paints a very frightening picture. According to Chris, [[Magi-Chan]] mentally scans the city perimeters for any sexual acts, and reports any [[homos|homosexual]] activity to the authorities. The participants are then "tried and fined HEAVILY; $500 or 50 Hours of Community Service."<ref>[[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck]]</ref> Apparently in CWCville, the [[Wikipedia:Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Fourth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution]] does not apply in matters of personal sexual choice, and neither does the [[wikipedia:Lawrence v. Texas|U.S. Supreme Court ruling]] finding sodomy laws to be unconstitutional.

Even though Chris's deranged laws exist only within his city-state-country-whatever of CWCville, he exacts his deranged fury unto people whether they're actually in his jurisdiction or not. [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu #10'']] shows four distinct crimes committed outside of CWCville: the destruction of the [[4-cent garbage]] building, the murder of over one hundred alleged "trolls" in said destruction, breaking and entering, and destroying Internet files and property. There was no evidence to suggest that this act of mass murder was even investigated by the authorities, and the comic portrays this act of [[Twin Falling Towers|terrorism]] as Chris and his goons heroically defeating a gang of criminals.

Chris may be able to commit murder without being reprimanded, but of course this doesn't apply to everyone. Following the death of [[Simonla]], the culprits ([[Alec]], [[Mao]], [[Sean]] and [[Evan]]) are subjected to a show trial, and given no defense attorney by the state (violating the [[Wikipedia:Sixth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Sixth Amendment]]) forcing Sean to act as their lawyer despite being [[Tobacky|high as a kite]]. There is no solid evidence presented for the murder charge, aside from the Voltorb remote (which the prosecutor never tried to prove belonged to them) and wholly unreliable "psychic evidence" extracted by Magi-Chan. When they're railroaded and found guilty, they're ''killed by the people they've wronged'' (read: murdered brutally by cartoon characters), in a gross violation of the [[Wikipedia:Eighth Amendment to the United States Constitution|Eighth Amendment]] forbidding cruel and unusual punishment.

Demonstrating Chris's limited understanding of trials (as his knowledge of trials stems purely from television), the kangaroo court integrates both elements of civil and criminal trials. The Asperpedia Four are not only prosecuted for murder by a [[Marvey Blaziken|state attorney]], as per a criminal trial, but also charged with defamation of character, libel, and copyright infringement (as well as several charges such as "profanity to the max" that would hold no water in an actual court) by Chris and his cohorts, as per a civil trial. Surely enough, Chris, Sonichu, and Rosechu are sitting in a bench marked "PLAINTIF" [sic]. That both civil and criminal charges are included in one trial not only demonstrates a poor understanding of the courtroom process, but is further proof that Chris considers "slanderous mockeries" and other torts on par with major crimes such as murder and assault. To add to the equation, one cannot be given a death sentence (or any sentence, for that matter) for being guilty in a civil trial, but in the Asperpedia Four trial civil charges are the primary reason for the death sentence. In summary, the CWCville court system is a constitutional nightmare that violates multiple articles and amendments, and has no concept of due process. One must wonder why it is allowed to exist within the borders of the U.S.

Were it not obvious by now, any semblance of law in CWCville exists solely to further the wishes of its tyrannical (and murderous) mayor.

== References ==
<references />

==See also==
*[[Parody]]
*[[Jerkop]]
*[[Manajerks]]
*[[Chris and copyright]]

{{Chris and}}