https://sonichu.com/w/api.php?action=feedcontributions&user=CaseHa&feedformat=atomCWCki - User contributions [en]2024-03-29T09:06:10ZUser contributionsMediaWiki 1.37.6https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Cutco&diff=202651Cutco2016-11-25T00:56:54Z<p>CaseHa: /* Other mentions */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Cutco logo.png|center]]<br />
[[Image:VectorLogo.png|right|thumb|Of course it's not a pyramid scheme; just look at the logo.]]<br />
[[Image:CutcoUltimateset.jpg|right|thumb|The knives that Chris never cut himself or anyone else with]]<br />
[[Image:147-LightKnife.jpg|right|thumb|Wonder where the inspiration for this card came from?]]<br />
<br />
'''Cutco''' is a company that sells overpriced medium-quality knives. [[Chris]] was employed by Cutco from June to September [[2003]], and it was the only other employer Chris has ever had besides [[Wendy's]].<br />
<br />
==Employment==<br />
<br />
Chris describes his background with Cutco in the [[Miyamoto Saga]] e-mails:<br />
<br />
{{quote|One summer I was employed as a Salesman for Cutco products; the owners of the "Double-D" Edge and the Super Shears that can cut a penny to create a [[Little Pig Blanket|pig-tail]]. Lifetime Guarantee on sharpness. The boss left at Summer's end, and I lost that job. FYI, I was very cautious with my samples of cutary ''[sic]'', and I do not have any intentions of harming myself or anyone else. My record is clean.|Chris, clarifying that he is not [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!|emo]]}}<br />
<br />
Cutco, under the guise of Vector Marketing, is a notorious borderline scam.<ref>http://marketingpr.suite101.com/article.cfm/vector_marketing_is_not_a_scam</ref> While arguably not an outright scam, they will hire more or less anyone who is willing to pay [[Chris_and_money|$150]] upfront for a "demo kit" and get people to buy overpriced knife sets on commission through [[Wikipedia:Sales lead|leads]] (in other words, Chris was not going door to door). They target high schoolers and college students along with people with no real experience (such as [[Autism|autistic]] manchildren) for these "sales positions."<br />
<br />
It is unknown if Chris was ever able to sell a knife set to any of his leads, as even people who aren't autistic, [[Obesity|corpulent]] manchildren have trouble doing so. Chris touched back on the subject on his [[CWCipedia]] entry, noting that "[my status as an employee] may have gone longer if my boss had not left [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]] for good in August."<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Private_villa_of_corrupted_citizens#Mary_Meets_Christian</ref> Chris is oblivious to the fact that his "boss" pretty much took his money and skipped town. He later told [[Vanessa Hudgens]] that his boss "got replaced."<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref><br />
<br />
Chris took the Cutco job at a critical moment in his personal life, as he had realized several months earlier that he needed a girlfriend. He seems to have hoped that the job could help him with his [[Love Quest|sweetheart search]]; he remembered that it gave him the opportunity to "socialize." He believed that the job had allowed him to utilize his "good people/social skills," and he was disappointed that it "was ONLY a Summer gig." It was at this point, with a growing sense of desperation and urgency, that he made his first [[Attraction Sign]], which stated that, among his other positive qualities, he was a "Natural salesperson."<br />
<br />
==Other mentions==<br />
*Chris put a Cutco outlet in [[CWCville Shopping Center]].<br />
*After Chris [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|crushed his dildo]] on 6 [[February 2009]], he used a pair of Cutco Super Shears to cut it into pieces.<ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><br />
*Chris used a Cutco knife to make his [[Chris and fashion|"Gay Trucker" denim top]].<ref>[[Kacey Call 2]]</ref> We can assume from these two references that he may have a number of unsold Cutco knives in his possession.<br />
*On Thanksgiving of 2016, Chris posted on Facebook that he used the Cutco "Spatula Spreader" to prepare his Thanksgiving dinner.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-24-happy-thanksgiving-from-chris.26054/]</ref> [[Chris and money|It's worth noting that Cutco's "Spatula Spreader" costs almost 70USD while other brands go for about 25.]]<ref>[https://www.cutco.com/products/product.jsp?item=spatula-spreader#sm.0001pftq8m19qmf9epxfzy32m90hh]</ref><br />
<br />
==Sources==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Pocket knife]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [[Wikipedia:Cutco|Wikipedia article]]<br />
{{Places}}<br />
[[Category: Jobs]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Cutco&diff=202650Cutco2016-11-25T00:15:49Z<p>CaseHa: /* Other mentions */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Cutco logo.png|center]]<br />
[[Image:VectorLogo.png|right|thumb|Of course it's not a pyramid scheme; just look at the logo.]]<br />
[[Image:CutcoUltimateset.jpg|right|thumb|The knives that Chris never cut himself or anyone else with]]<br />
[[Image:147-LightKnife.jpg|right|thumb|Wonder where the inspiration for this card came from?]]<br />
<br />
'''Cutco''' is a company that sells overpriced medium-quality knives. [[Chris]] was employed by Cutco from June to September [[2003]], and it was the only other employer Chris has ever had besides [[Wendy's]].<br />
<br />
==Employment==<br />
<br />
Chris describes his background with Cutco in the [[Miyamoto Saga]] e-mails:<br />
<br />
{{quote|One summer I was employed as a Salesman for Cutco products; the owners of the "Double-D" Edge and the Super Shears that can cut a penny to create a [[Little Pig Blanket|pig-tail]]. Lifetime Guarantee on sharpness. The boss left at Summer's end, and I lost that job. FYI, I was very cautious with my samples of cutary ''[sic]'', and I do not have any intentions of harming myself or anyone else. My record is clean.|Chris, clarifying that he is not [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!|emo]]}}<br />
<br />
Cutco, under the guise of Vector Marketing, is a notorious borderline scam.<ref>http://marketingpr.suite101.com/article.cfm/vector_marketing_is_not_a_scam</ref> While arguably not an outright scam, they will hire more or less anyone who is willing to pay [[Chris_and_money|$150]] upfront for a "demo kit" and get people to buy overpriced knife sets on commission through [[Wikipedia:Sales lead|leads]] (in other words, Chris was not going door to door). They target high schoolers and college students along with people with no real experience (such as [[Autism|autistic]] manchildren) for these "sales positions."<br />
<br />
It is unknown if Chris was ever able to sell a knife set to any of his leads, as even people who aren't autistic, [[Obesity|corpulent]] manchildren have trouble doing so. Chris touched back on the subject on his [[CWCipedia]] entry, noting that "[my status as an employee] may have gone longer if my boss had not left [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]] for good in August."<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Private_villa_of_corrupted_citizens#Mary_Meets_Christian</ref> Chris is oblivious to the fact that his "boss" pretty much took his money and skipped town. He later told [[Vanessa Hudgens]] that his boss "got replaced."<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref><br />
<br />
Chris took the Cutco job at a critical moment in his personal life, as he had realized several months earlier that he needed a girlfriend. He seems to have hoped that the job could help him with his [[Love Quest|sweetheart search]]; he remembered that it gave him the opportunity to "socialize." He believed that the job had allowed him to utilize his "good people/social skills," and he was disappointed that it "was ONLY a Summer gig." It was at this point, with a growing sense of desperation and urgency, that he made his first [[Attraction Sign]], which stated that, among his other positive qualities, he was a "Natural salesperson."<br />
<br />
==Other mentions==<br />
*Chris put a Cutco outlet in [[CWCville Shopping Center]].<br />
*After Chris [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|crushed his dildo]] on 6 [[February 2009]], he used a pair of Cutco Super Shears to cut it into pieces.<ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><br />
*Chris used a Cutco knife to make his [[Chris and fashion|"Gay Trucker" denim top]].<ref>[[Kacey Call 2]]</ref> We can assume from these two references that he may have a number of unsold Cutco knives in his possession.<br />
*On Thanksgiving of 2016, Chris posted on Facebook that he used the Cutco "Spatula Spreader" to prepare his Thanksgiving dinner. <ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-24-happy-thanksgiving-from-chris.26054/]</ref> [[Chris and money|It's worth noting that Cutco's "Spatula Spreader" costs almost 70USD while other brands go for about 25.]] <ref>[https://www.cutco.com/products/product.jsp?item=spatula-spreader#sm.0001pftq8m19qmf9epxfzy32m90hh]</ref><br />
<br />
==Sources==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Pocket knife]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [[Wikipedia:Cutco|Wikipedia article]]<br />
{{Places}}<br />
[[Category: Jobs]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Cutco&diff=202649Cutco2016-11-25T00:15:09Z<p>CaseHa: /* Other mentions */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Cutco logo.png|center]]<br />
[[Image:VectorLogo.png|right|thumb|Of course it's not a pyramid scheme; just look at the logo.]]<br />
[[Image:CutcoUltimateset.jpg|right|thumb|The knives that Chris never cut himself or anyone else with]]<br />
[[Image:147-LightKnife.jpg|right|thumb|Wonder where the inspiration for this card came from?]]<br />
<br />
'''Cutco''' is a company that sells overpriced medium-quality knives. [[Chris]] was employed by Cutco from June to September [[2003]], and it was the only other employer Chris has ever had besides [[Wendy's]].<br />
<br />
==Employment==<br />
<br />
Chris describes his background with Cutco in the [[Miyamoto Saga]] e-mails:<br />
<br />
{{quote|One summer I was employed as a Salesman for Cutco products; the owners of the "Double-D" Edge and the Super Shears that can cut a penny to create a [[Little Pig Blanket|pig-tail]]. Lifetime Guarantee on sharpness. The boss left at Summer's end, and I lost that job. FYI, I was very cautious with my samples of cutary ''[sic]'', and I do not have any intentions of harming myself or anyone else. My record is clean.|Chris, clarifying that he is not [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!|emo]]}}<br />
<br />
Cutco, under the guise of Vector Marketing, is a notorious borderline scam.<ref>http://marketingpr.suite101.com/article.cfm/vector_marketing_is_not_a_scam</ref> While arguably not an outright scam, they will hire more or less anyone who is willing to pay [[Chris_and_money|$150]] upfront for a "demo kit" and get people to buy overpriced knife sets on commission through [[Wikipedia:Sales lead|leads]] (in other words, Chris was not going door to door). They target high schoolers and college students along with people with no real experience (such as [[Autism|autistic]] manchildren) for these "sales positions."<br />
<br />
It is unknown if Chris was ever able to sell a knife set to any of his leads, as even people who aren't autistic, [[Obesity|corpulent]] manchildren have trouble doing so. Chris touched back on the subject on his [[CWCipedia]] entry, noting that "[my status as an employee] may have gone longer if my boss had not left [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]] for good in August."<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Private_villa_of_corrupted_citizens#Mary_Meets_Christian</ref> Chris is oblivious to the fact that his "boss" pretty much took his money and skipped town. He later told [[Vanessa Hudgens]] that his boss "got replaced."<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref><br />
<br />
Chris took the Cutco job at a critical moment in his personal life, as he had realized several months earlier that he needed a girlfriend. He seems to have hoped that the job could help him with his [[Love Quest|sweetheart search]]; he remembered that it gave him the opportunity to "socialize." He believed that the job had allowed him to utilize his "good people/social skills," and he was disappointed that it "was ONLY a Summer gig." It was at this point, with a growing sense of desperation and urgency, that he made his first [[Attraction Sign]], which stated that, among his other positive qualities, he was a "Natural salesperson."<br />
<br />
==Other mentions==<br />
*Chris put a Cutco outlet in [[CWCville Shopping Center]].<br />
*After Chris [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|crushed his dildo]] on 6 [[February 2009]], he used a pair of Cutco Super Shears to cut it into pieces.<ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><br />
*Chris used a Cutco knife to make his [[Chris and fashion|"Gay Trucker" denim top]].<ref>[[Kacey Call 2]]</ref> We can assume from these two references that he may have a number of unsold Cutco knives in his possession.<br />
*On Thanksgiving of 2016, Chris posted on Facebook that he used the Cutco "Spatula Spreader" to prepare his Thanksgiving dinner. <ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-24-happy-thanksgiving-from-chris.26054/]</ref> [[Chris and brand loyalty|It's worth saying that Cutco's "Spatula Spreader" costs almost 70USD while other brands go for about 25.]] <ref>[https://www.cutco.com/products/product.jsp?item=spatula-spreader#sm.0001pftq8m19qmf9epxfzy32m90hh]</ref><br />
<br />
==Sources==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Pocket knife]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [[Wikipedia:Cutco|Wikipedia article]]<br />
{{Places}}<br />
[[Category: Jobs]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Cutco&diff=202648Cutco2016-11-25T00:13:08Z<p>CaseHa: /* Other mentions */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Cutco logo.png|center]]<br />
[[Image:VectorLogo.png|right|thumb|Of course it's not a pyramid scheme; just look at the logo.]]<br />
[[Image:CutcoUltimateset.jpg|right|thumb|The knives that Chris never cut himself or anyone else with]]<br />
[[Image:147-LightKnife.jpg|right|thumb|Wonder where the inspiration for this card came from?]]<br />
<br />
'''Cutco''' is a company that sells overpriced medium-quality knives. [[Chris]] was employed by Cutco from June to September [[2003]], and it was the only other employer Chris has ever had besides [[Wendy's]].<br />
<br />
==Employment==<br />
<br />
Chris describes his background with Cutco in the [[Miyamoto Saga]] e-mails:<br />
<br />
{{quote|One summer I was employed as a Salesman for Cutco products; the owners of the "Double-D" Edge and the Super Shears that can cut a penny to create a [[Little Pig Blanket|pig-tail]]. Lifetime Guarantee on sharpness. The boss left at Summer's end, and I lost that job. FYI, I was very cautious with my samples of cutary ''[sic]'', and I do not have any intentions of harming myself or anyone else. My record is clean.|Chris, clarifying that he is not [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!|emo]]}}<br />
<br />
Cutco, under the guise of Vector Marketing, is a notorious borderline scam.<ref>http://marketingpr.suite101.com/article.cfm/vector_marketing_is_not_a_scam</ref> While arguably not an outright scam, they will hire more or less anyone who is willing to pay [[Chris_and_money|$150]] upfront for a "demo kit" and get people to buy overpriced knife sets on commission through [[Wikipedia:Sales lead|leads]] (in other words, Chris was not going door to door). They target high schoolers and college students along with people with no real experience (such as [[Autism|autistic]] manchildren) for these "sales positions."<br />
<br />
It is unknown if Chris was ever able to sell a knife set to any of his leads, as even people who aren't autistic, [[Obesity|corpulent]] manchildren have trouble doing so. Chris touched back on the subject on his [[CWCipedia]] entry, noting that "[my status as an employee] may have gone longer if my boss had not left [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]] for good in August."<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Private_villa_of_corrupted_citizens#Mary_Meets_Christian</ref> Chris is oblivious to the fact that his "boss" pretty much took his money and skipped town. He later told [[Vanessa Hudgens]] that his boss "got replaced."<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref><br />
<br />
Chris took the Cutco job at a critical moment in his personal life, as he had realized several months earlier that he needed a girlfriend. He seems to have hoped that the job could help him with his [[Love Quest|sweetheart search]]; he remembered that it gave him the opportunity to "socialize." He believed that the job had allowed him to utilize his "good people/social skills," and he was disappointed that it "was ONLY a Summer gig." It was at this point, with a growing sense of desperation and urgency, that he made his first [[Attraction Sign]], which stated that, among his other positive qualities, he was a "Natural salesperson."<br />
<br />
==Other mentions==<br />
*Chris put a Cutco outlet in [[CWCville Shopping Center]].<br />
*After Chris [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|crushed his dildo]] on 6 [[February 2009]], he used a pair of Cutco Super Shears to cut it into pieces.<ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><br />
*Chris used a Cutco knife to make his [[Chris and fashion|"Gay Trucker" denim top]].<ref>[[Kacey Call 2]]</ref> We can assume from these two references that he may have a number of unsold Cutco knives in his possession.<br />
*On Thanksgiving of 2016, Chris posted on Facebook that he used the Cutco "Spatula Spreader" to prepare his Thanksgiving dinner. <ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-24-happy-thanksgiving-from-chris.26054/]</ref> It's worth saying that Cutco's "Spatula Spreader" costs almost 70USD while other brands go for about 25 <ref>[https://www.cutco.com/products/product.jsp?item=spatula-spreader#sm.0001pftq8m19qmf9epxfzy32m90hh]</ref><br />
<br />
==Sources==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Pocket knife]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [[Wikipedia:Cutco|Wikipedia article]]<br />
{{Places}}<br />
[[Category: Jobs]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Cutco&diff=202647Cutco2016-11-25T00:08:20Z<p>CaseHa: /* Other mentions */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Cutco logo.png|center]]<br />
[[Image:VectorLogo.png|right|thumb|Of course it's not a pyramid scheme; just look at the logo.]]<br />
[[Image:CutcoUltimateset.jpg|right|thumb|The knives that Chris never cut himself or anyone else with]]<br />
[[Image:147-LightKnife.jpg|right|thumb|Wonder where the inspiration for this card came from?]]<br />
<br />
'''Cutco''' is a company that sells overpriced medium-quality knives. [[Chris]] was employed by Cutco from June to September [[2003]], and it was the only other employer Chris has ever had besides [[Wendy's]].<br />
<br />
==Employment==<br />
<br />
Chris describes his background with Cutco in the [[Miyamoto Saga]] e-mails:<br />
<br />
{{quote|One summer I was employed as a Salesman for Cutco products; the owners of the "Double-D" Edge and the Super Shears that can cut a penny to create a [[Little Pig Blanket|pig-tail]]. Lifetime Guarantee on sharpness. The boss left at Summer's end, and I lost that job. FYI, I was very cautious with my samples of cutary ''[sic]'', and I do not have any intentions of harming myself or anyone else. My record is clean.|Chris, clarifying that he is not [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!|emo]]}}<br />
<br />
Cutco, under the guise of Vector Marketing, is a notorious borderline scam.<ref>http://marketingpr.suite101.com/article.cfm/vector_marketing_is_not_a_scam</ref> While arguably not an outright scam, they will hire more or less anyone who is willing to pay [[Chris_and_money|$150]] upfront for a "demo kit" and get people to buy overpriced knife sets on commission through [[Wikipedia:Sales lead|leads]] (in other words, Chris was not going door to door). They target high schoolers and college students along with people with no real experience (such as [[Autism|autistic]] manchildren) for these "sales positions."<br />
<br />
It is unknown if Chris was ever able to sell a knife set to any of his leads, as even people who aren't autistic, [[Obesity|corpulent]] manchildren have trouble doing so. Chris touched back on the subject on his [[CWCipedia]] entry, noting that "[my status as an employee] may have gone longer if my boss had not left [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]] for good in August."<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Private_villa_of_corrupted_citizens#Mary_Meets_Christian</ref> Chris is oblivious to the fact that his "boss" pretty much took his money and skipped town. He later told [[Vanessa Hudgens]] that his boss "got replaced."<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref><br />
<br />
Chris took the Cutco job at a critical moment in his personal life, as he had realized several months earlier that he needed a girlfriend. He seems to have hoped that the job could help him with his [[Love Quest|sweetheart search]]; he remembered that it gave him the opportunity to "socialize." He believed that the job had allowed him to utilize his "good people/social skills," and he was disappointed that it "was ONLY a Summer gig." It was at this point, with a growing sense of desperation and urgency, that he made his first [[Attraction Sign]], which stated that, among his other positive qualities, he was a "Natural salesperson."<br />
<br />
==Other mentions==<br />
*Chris put a Cutco outlet in [[CWCville Shopping Center]].<br />
*After Chris [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|crushed his dildo]] on 6 [[February 2009]], he used a pair of Cutco Super Shears to cut it into pieces.<ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><br />
*Chris used a Cutco knife to make his [[Chris and fashion|"Gay Trucker" denim top]].<ref>[[Kacey Call 2]]</ref> We can assume from these two references that he may have a number of unsold Cutco knives in his possession.<br />
*On Thanksgiving of 2016, Chris posted on Facebook that he used the Cutco "Spatula Spreader" to prepare his Thanksgiving dinner. <ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-24-happy-thanksgiving-from-chris.26054/]</ref><br />
<br />
==Sources==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Pocket knife]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [[Wikipedia:Cutco|Wikipedia article]]<br />
{{Places}}<br />
[[Category: Jobs]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=2014_house_fire&diff=1745012014 house fire2014-09-11T20:06:31Z<p>CaseHa: /* Nature of the blaze */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
<br />
{{Quote|FIRE! 2:00 AM. [[Jerkop|911]] arrived ten minutes later. Did everything they could; started downstairs; bathroom; electrical; made it to the roof. Considering EVERYTHING, but [[Barbara Chandler|my mom]], [[Clover and Snoopy|both dogs]], [[Christian Weston Chandler|me]], and [[Chandler Cats|Lucy]] and my [[Idea Book Case|iPhone]], shoes, clothes, whatnot on our backs made it out... Considered physically lost.|Chris, January 10 2014}}<br />
<br />
On January 10, 2014, [[14 Branchland Court]], [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]], Virginia was devastated by an early morning fire. Chris first mentioned it on [[Facebook]] and this was confirmed later that day when a local TV news broadcast gave a brief report on the incident.<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Fire at 14 Branchland Court<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|qkYnMRh26Oo}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==Order of Events==<br />
[[File:14 Branchland Court on Fire - Copy.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris's house on fire.]]<br />
This is a rough, preliminary timeline of the events of the house fire. Times given, unless otherwise noted, should be considered approximate. It should be noted that much of what is known about the fire comes from Chris himself, and [[Chris and reality|may be a delusion, half-truth]], or an [[List of Chris's lies|outright lie]]. <br />
<br />
*'''2:00 a.m. EST''': According to Chris, this was approximately when the fire began. However, a [[Charlottesville, VA|local news station]] reporting on the blaze stated the fire started around 3:00am. Chris claimed in a leaked email that the coffee brewer was outside the bathroom, and was plugged into an extension cord, which in turn was plugged into an electrical outlet in the bathroom. Chris [[List of Chris's lies|claimed that the brewer was off when the fire started]], although he admitted that [[Honor roll|it was still plugged in]]. <br />
*'''2:00-2:10''': Chris claimed that a fire extinguisher was present or was retrieved, and that there was an attempt to extinguish the fire, which ultimately failed. After the failed attempt to extinguish the fire, Chris evacuated the household, along with Barbara and the Chandler pets. Sometime during this period, [[Ruckersville Fire Department|emergency services]] were called. <br />
*'''2:10''': Local fire fighters arrive at the scene. Given the moderate extent of apparent damage to the house, the blaze was probably extinguished a few minutes after the arrival of the fire fighters. One of the firefighters was injured extinguishing the blaze. When the local news crew arrived to film, it was before dawn, dozens of first responders were at the scene, and the fire had been completely put out. (It started to get light around 6 a.m.<ref>[http://www.sunrise-and-sunset.com/en/united-states/charlottesville/2014/january/10]</ref>) <br />
*'''5:22''': Chris first breaks the news about the house fire on Facebook. He commented twice on the post in quick succession, lamenting the loss of personal belongings and the memories of his home, as well as stating he was able to salvage his mother's medication and his wallet. At the time of the posting, he was boarding with a generous neighbor.<br />
*'''7:10''': Chris posted an angry comment on the Keurig Facebook page, producer of the coffee brewer, blaming faulty wiring in the product for creating the spark that created the fire. Chris then admitted to operating the coffee brewer within the bathroom after responding to a comment from his friend William Elliott Waterman, who vainly tried to calm Chris down and not seek vengeance so soon after the fire.<br />
*Later: An email from Chris is released giving more information about the event. It is revealed that Chris and Barbara were allowed to enter the house and retrieve necessities for living from the house, and are currently receiving accommodation from their insurer while investigation and "repairs" are conducted. Of note is that Chris was able to retrieve his 3DS, which is still functional, giving hope to the possibility that his room may still be intact, or at least left relatively undamaged by the blaze.<br />
<br />
==Nature of the blaze==<br />
The cause of the fire is still being investigated. <br />
<br />
According to Chris, the fire started in the downstairs bathroom, and was of an [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|electrical]] nature; most likely due to faulty wiring or from the short-circuiting of some electrical device. Chris, soon after making the initial posts, left a comment on the Facebook page of [[Wikipedia:Keurig|Keurig]] Coffee and Brewers, blaming the coffee brewer's faulty wiring for having "sparked my power socket" and starting the blaze. <br />
<br />
The question on if or why Chris was brewing coffee at 2 a.m. in the bathroom is not yet known, since te coffee maker could have been left on but not currently in use. It's possible due to his "[[biological clock]]" and the piles of junk cluttering his kitchen. It is worth noting that in [[Tour of Chris's House II|Chris' recent video tour of his home]], coffee cups are spotted around his bathroom sink, suggesting that the bathroom has become the primary source of water. Said video also shows the blatant fire hazard that is/was 14 Branchland Court; piles of paper and plastic inside a barely standing structure of dry wood.<br />
<br />
==Victims and survivors==<br />
Chris reports that he, his mother, his pet dogs [[Clover and Snoopy]] and Lucy the Cat escaped the blaze unharmed. It is unknown as of yet what has happened to the cats Scamper and Kitty; whether they were deceased prior to the blaze, or whether they were tragically lost in the fire. Many of the cats spend much of their time outdoors and could be presumed to have survived if they were alive at the time of the fire.<br />
<br />
According to the news report, one of the firefighters suffered minor, unspecified injuries while putting out the fire. Considering how difficult it is for Chris to navigate his junk-ridden hallways it is likely that, in the rush to fight the fire, one firefighter may have tripped over the clutter or initiated an avalanche.<br />
<br />
=== Firefighters ===<br />
Unlike the [[Jerkop|local police departments of Greene County]], Chris has historically been ambivalent to firefighters. However, in the aftermath of the house fire at 14 Branchland Court, Chris and his mother both apparently blame the "greedy firefighters" for the absence of some of their personal possessions, (a cheap knock-off painting and [[Barbara Chandler|Barb's]] purse) effectively implicating them of theft. This information was revealed in an [[Misc_E-mails#Greedy_Firefighter|email]] leak after the incident. Insinuating that one of the brave and selfless firefighters who saved his home openly [[Chris and his Ego|stole from him]], especially when there were [[Chris and reality|no grounds whatsoever for his implications]], is a new low even for Chris. Once again, Chris shows complete ingratitude for anyone who tries to help him. Only time will tell if the Ruckersville Fire Department will again play a major part in Chris's pathetic life.<br />
<br />
==Extent of destruction==<br />
[[File:14305011100_debcde366f_b.jpg|thumb|Photo of the melted Lego Manchester High School, taken within the house on 11 Jan 2014.]]<br />
From what Chris has written so far, it can be assumed that the Chandlers escaped with little more than the clothes on their backs. Chris wrote that he was able to save his wallet, medication for his mother, as well as some clothes and shoes, as well as his iPhone. Since the fire, Chris has also been observed on Miiverse, suggesting that he also managed to save at least one of his [[3DS]]'s. He has also been seen on his PSN, showing that he either still has his [[PS3]], or that he promptly acquired another. The [[Lego]] [[Manchester High School|High School]] escaped only partially melted. Chris's Facebook posts suggests that everything else is "Considered physically lost."<br />
<br />
A troll visited the house two days after the fire, and found that while the exterior structure of the house appears largely intact, there was apparently sufficient damage to the roof that it had to be covered over with plastic cladding. Some of the exterior wood paneling had also warped and twisted, presumably due to being near where the fire was burning at its strongest, though due to the house's exact layout being unknown it's hard to say where exactly this was. The house's windows had been boarded over (as is standard in house fires of this kind), making it impossible to get any exact details on the house's interior condition at this time.<br />
<br />
Until more information is released, we can assume that anything else in 14 Branchland Court was destroyed by the flames, including all of the original [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comics]] and Chris's other [[Chris and art|art]], [[the Wall of Originals]], the [[Megatron pistol]], the [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon Poster]], the portal to [[CWCville]], the [[Attraction Sign]]s, the [[Heart Torch of Fail|Heart Torch]], the [[Plush Breasts]] and [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]'s records. In reply to a comment on his [[eBay]] auction of his autographed photos, Chris confirmed that the [[Chris and fashion|"Classic" shirt]] was lost in the flames. However, at least one [[medallion]] survived.<br />
<br />
If the damage to 14 Branchland Court is enough for it to be condemned, this could be a chance for the Chandler family to abandon the shackles of their hoarded possessions. Letting go of his [[Relics of Fail|items of comfort]] could enable Chris to start a new life, encouraging him to turn his back on the past. But knowing Chris' track record for making life-changing decisions, it is likely he will re-purchase most of his prized possessions and mope for the next year over the loss of his comics.<br />
<br />
Items re-bought and replaced so far:<br />
*Multiple Lego sets<br />
*Uncut Sailor Moon DVDs (not lost in the fire: to replace the ones he gifted to Megan some seven years prior)<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[January 2014 Facebook Posts]] - Facebook posts Chris posted about the house fire.<br />
* [[Misc E-mails]] - E-mails exchanged between Chris and his classmates about the house fire.<br />
* [[Rental House]] - The Chandlers' temporary household after the incident.<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
{{Facebook}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris's house]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=2014_house_fire&diff=1744992014 house fire2014-09-11T20:05:36Z<p>CaseHa: /* Nature of the blaze */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
<br />
{{Quote|FIRE! 2:00 AM. [[Jerkop|911]] arrived ten minutes later. Did everything they could; started downstairs; bathroom; electrical; made it to the roof. Considering EVERYTHING, but [[Barbara Chandler|my mom]], [[Clover and Snoopy|both dogs]], [[Christian Weston Chandler|me]], and [[Chandler Cats|Lucy]] and my [[Idea Book Case|iPhone]], shoes, clothes, whatnot on our backs made it out... Considered physically lost.|Chris, January 10 2014}}<br />
<br />
On January 10, 2014, [[14 Branchland Court]], [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]], Virginia was devastated by an early morning fire. Chris first mentioned it on [[Facebook]] and this was confirmed later that day when a local TV news broadcast gave a brief report on the incident.<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Fire at 14 Branchland Court<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|qkYnMRh26Oo}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==Order of Events==<br />
[[File:14 Branchland Court on Fire - Copy.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris's house on fire.]]<br />
This is a rough, preliminary timeline of the events of the house fire. Times given, unless otherwise noted, should be considered approximate. It should be noted that much of what is known about the fire comes from Chris himself, and [[Chris and reality|may be a delusion, half-truth]], or an [[List of Chris's lies|outright lie]]. <br />
<br />
*'''2:00 a.m. EST''': According to Chris, this was approximately when the fire began. However, a [[Charlottesville, VA|local news station]] reporting on the blaze stated the fire started around 3:00am. Chris claimed in a leaked email that the coffee brewer was outside the bathroom, and was plugged into an extension cord, which in turn was plugged into an electrical outlet in the bathroom. Chris [[List of Chris's lies|claimed that the brewer was off when the fire started]], although he admitted that [[Honor roll|it was still plugged in]]. <br />
*'''2:00-2:10''': Chris claimed that a fire extinguisher was present or was retrieved, and that there was an attempt to extinguish the fire, which ultimately failed. After the failed attempt to extinguish the fire, Chris evacuated the household, along with Barbara and the Chandler pets. Sometime during this period, [[Ruckersville Fire Department|emergency services]] were called. <br />
*'''2:10''': Local fire fighters arrive at the scene. Given the moderate extent of apparent damage to the house, the blaze was probably extinguished a few minutes after the arrival of the fire fighters. One of the firefighters was injured extinguishing the blaze. When the local news crew arrived to film, it was before dawn, dozens of first responders were at the scene, and the fire had been completely put out. (It started to get light around 6 a.m.<ref>[http://www.sunrise-and-sunset.com/en/united-states/charlottesville/2014/january/10]</ref>) <br />
*'''5:22''': Chris first breaks the news about the house fire on Facebook. He commented twice on the post in quick succession, lamenting the loss of personal belongings and the memories of his home, as well as stating he was able to salvage his mother's medication and his wallet. At the time of the posting, he was boarding with a generous neighbor.<br />
*'''7:10''': Chris posted an angry comment on the Keurig Facebook page, producer of the coffee brewer, blaming faulty wiring in the product for creating the spark that created the fire. Chris then admitted to operating the coffee brewer within the bathroom after responding to a comment from his friend William Elliott Waterman, who vainly tried to calm Chris down and not seek vengeance so soon after the fire.<br />
*Later: An email from Chris is released giving more information about the event. It is revealed that Chris and Barbara were allowed to enter the house and retrieve necessities for living from the house, and are currently receiving accommodation from their insurer while investigation and "repairs" are conducted. Of note is that Chris was able to retrieve his 3DS, which is still functional, giving hope to the possibility that his room may still be intact, or at least left relatively undamaged by the blaze.<br />
<br />
==Nature of the blaze==<br />
The cause of the fire is still being investigated. <br />
<br />
According to Chris, the fire started in the downstairs bathroom, and was of an [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|electrical]] nature; most likely due to faulty wiring or from the short-circuiting of some electrical device. Chris, soon after making the initial posts, left a comment on the Facebook page of [[Wikipedia:Keurig|Keurig]] Coffee and Brewers, blaming the coffee brewer's faulty wiring for having "sparked my power socket" and starting the blaze. <br />
<br />
The question on whether or not Chris was brewing coffee at 2 a.m. in the bathroom is not yet known, since te coffee maker could have been left on but not currently in use. It's possible due to his "[[biological clock]]" and the piles of junk cluttering his kitchen. It is worth noting that in [[Tour of Chris's House II|Chris' recent video tour of his home]], coffee cups are spotted around his bathroom sink, suggesting that the bathroom has become the primary source of water. Said video also shows the blatant fire hazard that is/was 14 Branchland Court; piles of paper and plastic inside a barely standing structure of dry wood.<br />
<br />
==Victims and survivors==<br />
Chris reports that he, his mother, his pet dogs [[Clover and Snoopy]] and Lucy the Cat escaped the blaze unharmed. It is unknown as of yet what has happened to the cats Scamper and Kitty; whether they were deceased prior to the blaze, or whether they were tragically lost in the fire. Many of the cats spend much of their time outdoors and could be presumed to have survived if they were alive at the time of the fire.<br />
<br />
According to the news report, one of the firefighters suffered minor, unspecified injuries while putting out the fire. Considering how difficult it is for Chris to navigate his junk-ridden hallways it is likely that, in the rush to fight the fire, one firefighter may have tripped over the clutter or initiated an avalanche.<br />
<br />
=== Firefighters ===<br />
Unlike the [[Jerkop|local police departments of Greene County]], Chris has historically been ambivalent to firefighters. However, in the aftermath of the house fire at 14 Branchland Court, Chris and his mother both apparently blame the "greedy firefighters" for the absence of some of their personal possessions, (a cheap knock-off painting and [[Barbara Chandler|Barb's]] purse) effectively implicating them of theft. This information was revealed in an [[Misc_E-mails#Greedy_Firefighter|email]] leak after the incident. Insinuating that one of the brave and selfless firefighters who saved his home openly [[Chris and his Ego|stole from him]], especially when there were [[Chris and reality|no grounds whatsoever for his implications]], is a new low even for Chris. Once again, Chris shows complete ingratitude for anyone who tries to help him. Only time will tell if the Ruckersville Fire Department will again play a major part in Chris's pathetic life.<br />
<br />
==Extent of destruction==<br />
[[File:14305011100_debcde366f_b.jpg|thumb|Photo of the melted Lego Manchester High School, taken within the house on 11 Jan 2014.]]<br />
From what Chris has written so far, it can be assumed that the Chandlers escaped with little more than the clothes on their backs. Chris wrote that he was able to save his wallet, medication for his mother, as well as some clothes and shoes, as well as his iPhone. Since the fire, Chris has also been observed on Miiverse, suggesting that he also managed to save at least one of his [[3DS]]'s. He has also been seen on his PSN, showing that he either still has his [[PS3]], or that he promptly acquired another. The [[Lego]] [[Manchester High School|High School]] escaped only partially melted. Chris's Facebook posts suggests that everything else is "Considered physically lost."<br />
<br />
A troll visited the house two days after the fire, and found that while the exterior structure of the house appears largely intact, there was apparently sufficient damage to the roof that it had to be covered over with plastic cladding. Some of the exterior wood paneling had also warped and twisted, presumably due to being near where the fire was burning at its strongest, though due to the house's exact layout being unknown it's hard to say where exactly this was. The house's windows had been boarded over (as is standard in house fires of this kind), making it impossible to get any exact details on the house's interior condition at this time.<br />
<br />
Until more information is released, we can assume that anything else in 14 Branchland Court was destroyed by the flames, including all of the original [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comics]] and Chris's other [[Chris and art|art]], [[the Wall of Originals]], the [[Megatron pistol]], the [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon Poster]], the portal to [[CWCville]], the [[Attraction Sign]]s, the [[Heart Torch of Fail|Heart Torch]], the [[Plush Breasts]] and [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]'s records. In reply to a comment on his [[eBay]] auction of his autographed photos, Chris confirmed that the [[Chris and fashion|"Classic" shirt]] was lost in the flames. However, at least one [[medallion]] survived.<br />
<br />
If the damage to 14 Branchland Court is enough for it to be condemned, this could be a chance for the Chandler family to abandon the shackles of their hoarded possessions. Letting go of his [[Relics of Fail|items of comfort]] could enable Chris to start a new life, encouraging him to turn his back on the past. But knowing Chris' track record for making life-changing decisions, it is likely he will re-purchase most of his prized possessions and mope for the next year over the loss of his comics.<br />
<br />
Items re-bought and replaced so far:<br />
*Multiple Lego sets<br />
*Uncut Sailor Moon DVDs (not lost in the fire: to replace the ones he gifted to Megan some seven years prior)<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[January 2014 Facebook Posts]] - Facebook posts Chris posted about the house fire.<br />
* [[Misc E-mails]] - E-mails exchanged between Chris and his classmates about the house fire.<br />
* [[Rental House]] - The Chandlers' temporary household after the incident.<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
{{Facebook}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris's house]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=2014_house_fire&diff=1744942014 house fire2014-09-11T19:58:39Z<p>CaseHa: /* Nature of the blaze */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
<br />
{{Quote|FIRE! 2:00 AM. [[Jerkop|911]] arrived ten minutes later. Did everything they could; started downstairs; bathroom; electrical; made it to the roof. Considering EVERYTHING, but [[Barbara Chandler|my mom]], [[Clover and Snoopy|both dogs]], [[Christian Weston Chandler|me]], and [[Chandler Cats|Lucy]] and my [[Idea Book Case|iPhone]], shoes, clothes, whatnot on our backs made it out... Considered physically lost.|Chris, January 10 2014}}<br />
<br />
On January 10, 2014, [[14 Branchland Court]], [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]], Virginia was devastated by an early morning fire. Chris first mentioned it on [[Facebook]] and this was confirmed later that day when a local TV news broadcast gave a brief report on the incident.<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Fire at 14 Branchland Court<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|qkYnMRh26Oo}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==Order of Events==<br />
[[File:14 Branchland Court on Fire - Copy.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris's house on fire.]]<br />
This is a rough, preliminary timeline of the events of the house fire. Times given, unless otherwise noted, should be considered approximate. It should be noted that much of what is known about the fire comes from Chris himself, and [[Chris and reality|may be a delusion, half-truth]], or an [[List of Chris's lies|outright lie]]. <br />
<br />
*'''2:00 a.m. EST''': According to Chris, this was approximately when the fire began. However, a [[Charlottesville, VA|local news station]] reporting on the blaze stated the fire started around 3:00am. Chris claimed in a leaked email that the coffee brewer was outside the bathroom, and was plugged into an extension cord, which in turn was plugged into an electrical outlet in the bathroom. Chris [[List of Chris's lies|claimed that the brewer was off when the fire started]], although he admitted that [[Honor roll|it was still plugged in]]. <br />
*'''2:00-2:10''': Chris claimed that a fire extinguisher was present or was retrieved, and that there was an attempt to extinguish the fire, which ultimately failed. After the failed attempt to extinguish the fire, Chris evacuated the household, along with Barbara and the Chandler pets. Sometime during this period, [[Ruckersville Fire Department|emergency services]] were called. <br />
*'''2:10''': Local fire fighters arrive at the scene. Given the moderate extent of apparent damage to the house, the blaze was probably extinguished a few minutes after the arrival of the fire fighters. One of the firefighters was injured extinguishing the blaze. When the local news crew arrived to film, it was before dawn, dozens of first responders were at the scene, and the fire had been completely put out. (It started to get light around 6 a.m.<ref>[http://www.sunrise-and-sunset.com/en/united-states/charlottesville/2014/january/10]</ref>) <br />
*'''5:22''': Chris first breaks the news about the house fire on Facebook. He commented twice on the post in quick succession, lamenting the loss of personal belongings and the memories of his home, as well as stating he was able to salvage his mother's medication and his wallet. At the time of the posting, he was boarding with a generous neighbor.<br />
*'''7:10''': Chris posted an angry comment on the Keurig Facebook page, producer of the coffee brewer, blaming faulty wiring in the product for creating the spark that created the fire. Chris then admitted to operating the coffee brewer within the bathroom after responding to a comment from his friend William Elliott Waterman, who vainly tried to calm Chris down and not seek vengeance so soon after the fire.<br />
*Later: An email from Chris is released giving more information about the event. It is revealed that Chris and Barbara were allowed to enter the house and retrieve necessities for living from the house, and are currently receiving accommodation from their insurer while investigation and "repairs" are conducted. Of note is that Chris was able to retrieve his 3DS, which is still functional, giving hope to the possibility that his room may still be intact, or at least left relatively undamaged by the blaze.<br />
<br />
==Nature of the blaze==<br />
The cause of the fire is still being investigated. <br />
<br />
According to Chris, the fire started in the downstairs bathroom, and was of an [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|electrical]] nature; most likely due to faulty wiring or from the short-circuiting of some electrical device. Chris, soon after making the initial posts, left a comment on the Facebook page of [[Wikipedia:Keurig|Keurig]] Coffee and Brewers, blaming the coffee brewer's faulty wiring for having "sparked my power socket" and starting the blaze. <br />
<br />
If or why Chris was brewing coffee at 2 a.m. in the bathroom is not yet known, but it is likely due to his "[[biological clock]]" and the piles of junk cluttering his kitchen. It is worth noting that in [[Tour of Chris's House II|Chris' recent video tour of his home]], coffee cups are spotted around his bathroom sink, suggesting that the bathroom has become the primary source of water. Said video also shows the blatant fire hazard that is/was 14 Branchland Court; piles of paper and plastic inside a barely standing structure of dry wood.<br />
<br />
==Victims and survivors==<br />
Chris reports that he, his mother, his pet dogs [[Clover and Snoopy]] and Lucy the Cat escaped the blaze unharmed. It is unknown as of yet what has happened to the cats Scamper and Kitty; whether they were deceased prior to the blaze, or whether they were tragically lost in the fire. Many of the cats spend much of their time outdoors and could be presumed to have survived if they were alive at the time of the fire.<br />
<br />
According to the news report, one of the firefighters suffered minor, unspecified injuries while putting out the fire. Considering how difficult it is for Chris to navigate his junk-ridden hallways it is likely that, in the rush to fight the fire, one firefighter may have tripped over the clutter or initiated an avalanche.<br />
<br />
=== Firefighters ===<br />
Unlike the [[Jerkop|local police departments of Greene County]], Chris has historically been ambivalent to firefighters. However, in the aftermath of the house fire at 14 Branchland Court, Chris and his mother both apparently blame the "greedy firefighters" for the absence of some of their personal possessions, (a cheap knock-off painting and [[Barbara Chandler|Barb's]] purse) effectively implicating them of theft. This information was revealed in an [[Misc_E-mails#Greedy_Firefighter|email]] leak after the incident. Insinuating that one of the brave and selfless firefighters who saved his home openly [[Chris and his Ego|stole from him]], especially when there were [[Chris and reality|no grounds whatsoever for his implications]], is a new low even for Chris. Once again, Chris shows complete ingratitude for anyone who tries to help him. Only time will tell if the Ruckersville Fire Department will again play a major part in Chris's pathetic life.<br />
<br />
==Extent of destruction==<br />
[[File:14305011100_debcde366f_b.jpg|thumb|Photo of the melted Lego Manchester High School, taken within the house on 11 Jan 2014.]]<br />
From what Chris has written so far, it can be assumed that the Chandlers escaped with little more than the clothes on their backs. Chris wrote that he was able to save his wallet, medication for his mother, as well as some clothes and shoes, as well as his iPhone. Since the fire, Chris has also been observed on Miiverse, suggesting that he also managed to save at least one of his [[3DS]]'s. He has also been seen on his PSN, showing that he either still has his [[PS3]], or that he promptly acquired another. The [[Lego]] [[Manchester High School|High School]] escaped only partially melted. Chris's Facebook posts suggests that everything else is "Considered physically lost."<br />
<br />
A troll visited the house two days after the fire, and found that while the exterior structure of the house appears largely intact, there was apparently sufficient damage to the roof that it had to be covered over with plastic cladding. Some of the exterior wood paneling had also warped and twisted, presumably due to being near where the fire was burning at its strongest, though due to the house's exact layout being unknown it's hard to say where exactly this was. The house's windows had been boarded over (as is standard in house fires of this kind), making it impossible to get any exact details on the house's interior condition at this time.<br />
<br />
Until more information is released, we can assume that anything else in 14 Branchland Court was destroyed by the flames, including all of the original [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comics]] and Chris's other [[Chris and art|art]], [[the Wall of Originals]], the [[Megatron pistol]], the [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon Poster]], the portal to [[CWCville]], the [[Attraction Sign]]s, the [[Heart Torch of Fail|Heart Torch]], the [[Plush Breasts]] and [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]'s records. In reply to a comment on his [[eBay]] auction of his autographed photos, Chris confirmed that the [[Chris and fashion|"Classic" shirt]] was lost in the flames. However, at least one [[medallion]] survived.<br />
<br />
If the damage to 14 Branchland Court is enough for it to be condemned, this could be a chance for the Chandler family to abandon the shackles of their hoarded possessions. Letting go of his [[Relics of Fail|items of comfort]] could enable Chris to start a new life, encouraging him to turn his back on the past. But knowing Chris' track record for making life-changing decisions, it is likely he will re-purchase most of his prized possessions and mope for the next year over the loss of his comics.<br />
<br />
Items re-bought and replaced so far:<br />
*Multiple Lego sets<br />
*Uncut Sailor Moon DVDs (not lost in the fire: to replace the ones he gifted to Megan some seven years prior)<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[January 2014 Facebook Posts]] - Facebook posts Chris posted about the house fire.<br />
* [[Misc E-mails]] - E-mails exchanged between Chris and his classmates about the house fire.<br />
* [[Rental House]] - The Chandlers' temporary household after the incident.<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
{{Facebook}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris's house]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Kick_the_Autistic&diff=171028Kick the Autistic2014-05-27T00:57:38Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div><center>[[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]]</center><br />
[[Image:KickTheAutisticWii.jpg|thumb|Game of the Year, all years.]]<br />
<br />
'''Kick the [[Autism|Autistic]]''' is the act of doing anything [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] doesn't like. It is very probable he has done this in the past to get "[[china|speshul treatment]]" from "Young Ladies."<br />
<br />
==Variations==<br />
[[File:Kta.PNG|thumb|And on [[HEXBox]]!]]<br />
There are many known variations of the game, and we will go through the most effective.<br />
<br />
===Artistic Style===<br />
Enter a competition of artistry where Chris also competes, and [[Honor roll|out-talent him]]. This is usually easily done by showing any competence at all. Favored by [[Manchester High School#Graduation|his fellow students]] and [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|that no-good Adam Stackhouse]]. Beware: Chris may [[CWC is Angry|get grumpy and shoot at your photograph.]] Or beat you up in [[Soul Calibur]].<br />
<br />
===Chris Style===<br />
Set yourself up as one of the most visible and recognized representatives of autism within [[Chris and the Internet|internet]] culture. [[Chris and negotiation|Act like an entitled child]] and [[Chris and sex|develop]] horrifying [[recycling|perversions]], which you discuss on [[YouTube]]. Give other autistic people as well as those with Asperger Syndrome (which he hates) a bad reputation by association. There is a 100% chance this will result in them trolling you.<br />
<br />
===[[Blanca]] Style===<br />
Take the time to befriend Chris and pretend you are a [[Boyfriend Free Girl]] until Chris trusts you. Then get Chris to give you something of value to him, and destroy it.<br />
<br />
===[[Jimmy Hill]] Style===<br />
Chris is very funny about the material which he has plagiarized. If you are an artist troll or just bored, plagiarize Chris's plagiarized comics. He will throw a fit and "take legal action against you if not removed by 14 days."<br />
<br />
===[[Sweetheart]] Style===<br />
Chris is of the completely clueless type, and will trust anyone <s>with a little bit of time</s> who claims to have a [[China|china]]. Pretend to befriend Chris, and when you have gained his trust, tell him to do something lulzy. Say you are a woman who is turned on at the thought of him drinking his own [[semen]]. Once this happens, put the goods up on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and wait for the lulz to come pouring in.<br />
<br />
===[[Man in the Pickle Suit|Pickleman]] Style===<br />
Somehow meet up with Chris while wearing a pickle suit. He will be bewildered by it and powerless to act.<br />
<br />
===[[The Miscreants|Miscreant]] Style===<br />
Set [[Sonichu|events]] in motion that will keep Chris from [[Virgin with rage|ever getting laid.]] Physically [[Chris and health|weaken]] him so that he can't even rape women to lose his virginity, or do anything else for that matter. Extra points for [[Jimmy Hill|clouding]] [[BlueSpike|his]] [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|judgement.]] As an added "fuck you," send <s>an impostor</s> [[Liquid Chris|The True and Honest Christian Weston Chandler]] to swipe [[Kacey|his sweetheart.]]<br />
<br />
Keep doing this for the rest of his life, then send him to Hell where he'll be trolled for all eternity... or reincarnated as a pickle... whichever.<br />
<br />
The current champion of this style is Chris himself.<br />
<br />
===[[Liquid]] Style===<br />
<s>Pretend that you are the</s> Be the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of [[Sonichu]], the electric hedgehog Pokémon. Upload videos on [[YouTube]] detailing your many encounters with [[Clyde Cash]] and your success at attracting a boyfriend free girl. Brag about the millions you have earned thanks to Sonichu, and try to conquer the Sonichu media empire that is rightfully yours.<br />
<br />
Alec Benson Leary of [[Asperchu]] has used a similar tactic, to much the same effect. Bonus points for buying ad space on the [[CWCipedia]].<br />
<br />
===[[Michael Snyder]] Style===<br />
[[List of places that have banned Chris|Permaban]] Chris from [[The GAMe PLACe|an establishment]] for [[Chris and anger|no]] [[Chris and his Ego|good]] [[death threats|reason]] other than [[Autism#Chris and other autistics|sheer hatred for autistic people]]. Patiently wait until he tries to come back to his rightful place, and then [[28 October 2011#Email?|rub your legs on his car's bumper in order to fake injury]]. Sue Chris for damages and bribe [[July 2012 Facebook posts#Court|whoever needs to be bribed]]; once this is done, you'll be rolling in the dough.<br />
<br />
===[[God]] Style===<br />
Refuse to bail out the one and only Autistic Hero and center of your universe, Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, VA whenever he hits parked cars, [[28 October 2011|trespasses on private property]], or [[Walmart|vandalizes store displays]]. Grant prayers to people with concerns that aren't half as important as winning glorious victory over the Trolls/Cyber-Bullies. Finally, [[Destruction Of Chris's House|refuse to step in when your Autistic Hero accidentally sets fire to his home]].<br />
<br />
===[[Gal-Pal]] Style===<br />
<br />
Reveal that [[Kellie_Andes|you]] were [[Gal-Pal#Betrayal|just friends with him out of pity]]. Then, when Chris [[Chris and Anger|throws a tantrum]] about it, turn that pity into laughter by linking to one of [[For_J-R's_Eyes_Only.MOV|his videos]] for all of his former gal-pals to see just how far he's fallen since they've last seen him.<br />
<br />
===Literally===<br />
<br />
Examples of literally kicking the autistic include: The teachers at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]] (barely), [[Jerkops]] (probably exaggerated) and [[Niggos#Conflicts_at_The_GAMe_PLACe|TJ from GAMe PLACe]] (almost).<br />
<br />
Chris has never experienced any substantial physical pain in his entire life that we know of. No broken bones or bare knuckle fights. His parents never raised a hand against him. There is also no record of him being grounded, or punished in any significant way even after he was [[Bob Walks In|caught masturbating in the kitchen]]. There is an anecdotal story about the time that [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]] tried to teach him how to roller-skate. Chris fell and skinned his knee, vowing never to roller skate again.<br />
<br />
Because Chris has never been through the "school of hard knocks" ([[Charlottesville_Fashion_Square#Chris_vs._Fashion_Square|even running away if a confrontation seems imminent]],) he seems pretty confident that he [[Mary Lee Walsh|can]] [[Surfshack Tito|tell]] [[Clyde Cash|any]][[Michael Snyder|one]] [[Death threats|any]][[Chris and race|thing]] [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|he]] [[Michael_Snyder_is_ColdHearted_and_Mean|wants]] without fear of consequence. However, with his latest skirmish on the [[28 October 2011]], it remained to be seen if things would have remained this way if he was sentenced to jail, where prisoners don't take too kindly to self-entitled manchildren who throw [[Chris and anger|temper tantrums.]] Fortunately for him, he evaded this fate.<br />
<br />
==Uses by Chris==<br />
Recorded examples of this particular CWC-ism include the following:<br />
<br />
*In the e-mail he sent to Sony after losing [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]], Chris blamed his failure on "AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, 'KICK THE AUTISTIC!'"<br />
*At the same time, in his first [[PSN Blogs|PSN blog entry]] cursing [[Adam Stackhouse]], he bitched and mixed his metaphors about how "I have been the dog in America's favorite game, 'KICK THE AUTISTIC' for my whole life."<br />
*After finding out that [[PandaHalo|Panda]] was a troll during [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], Chris whined, "And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of 'Kick the Autistic'."<br />
*Addressing [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] users on 21 January 2008, Chris wrote ''"And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of "KICK THE AUTISTIC", [[Chris and hypocrisy|then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.]]"''<br />
*A variation was used in Chris's second version of [[It's UGH!#Remake|Ok2bgay]], with Chris opening the video with the words "Merry Kickmas".<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Jerkop]]<br />
*[[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] - Video game president, hoping to release Kick the Autistic on all major Nintendo consoles in time for Christmas.<br />
*[[Troll]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://www.pictogame.com/en/play/game/bq1o8yBlHtPu_cwc-in-kick-the-autistic Click to play!!] (Offline)<br />
<br />
{{CWC-isms}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:CWC-isms]][[Category:Things Chris hates]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Megagi_La_Skunk&diff=167748Megagi La Skunk2013-10-04T01:08:40Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:MegagiDecay.jpg|thumb|left|An example of Megagi's change in personality.]]<br />
[[Image:Megagi.jpg|thumb|Megagi's reaction to being included in Christian's shitty comic.]]<br />
<br />
{{quote|Whether or not you've noticed NONE of my original female characters have....breasts. I just don't believe in giving animals that kind of human quality.|Megan on Megagi, [[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007#Megan gives Chris a lesson in canine anatomy|6 March 2007]]}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|SHE DOES HAVE BREASTS. Megan Schroeder DREW THAT WAY.|Chris on Megagi, [[IRC (20 January 2009)]]}}<br />
<br />
'''Megagi La Skunk''' (pronounced [mɛˈgɑːdʒi], "megaudjy"<ref>[[Sonichu 6 Official Videobook]]</ref>) is one of [[Megan Schroeder]]'s furry-inspired characters who dates [[Bionic the Hedgehog]]. She has outlived her creator's presence in the comic, similar to [[Jiggliami]], except Megan was (probably) not a [[troll]]. <br />
<br />
Megagi was originally called '''Spunky Skunk''', which Chris didn't like because it might have reminded him of a rather [[Semen|nasty habit]]. She also did not have breasts in her original drawing or first appearances in the comic, but Chris added them in later for [[Mass debating|unknown reasons]].<br />
<br />
Given her name and color scheme, she likely constitutes a plagiarism of ''[[Wikipedia:Tiny Toon Adventures|Tiny Toon Adventures]]'' character [[Wikipedia:Fifi La Fume|Fifi La Fume]]. She may also be a ripoff of the Sonic character Fang the Sniper (Nack the Weasel), given her colour and design.<br />
<br />
Megagi is colored purple and pink. The same colors are used to symbolise [[homos|homosexual pride]].<br />
<br />
Worth noting is that Megagi was originally from [[Parody]] Island, where she probably lives with Megan's other traced [[Sonic]]/[[Pokémon]] hybrids, but the name was changed to [[Chris and religion|Parodyse]] Island in the comic.<br />
<br />
Megagi used to have somewhat of a different personality from the other female characters at first; she seemed to be the [[Silvana|tomboyish]] type, and Chris described her as being like an "Army Soldier". In [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]], she calls Chris out on his shit.<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/images/0/03/SchuComic6P21.jpg]</ref> Although her concept is still not so original, it was different from the typical [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]] who just liked shopping. However, in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], she gets watered down just like the rest of them - [[Women's rights|girly and no personality]] - and later on in the comic she is further reduced to being [[Bionic]]'s personal cheerleader.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
As of 2013OCT3 it appears Megagi is still in contact with Chris (in real life, mind you) and she shares his disgust with Megan.<br />
{{quote|By the way, I have checked with Megagi La Skunk; she feels deep distrust in you. We mutually agree that you should have never been born, even if it meant she would never exist.|Chris, in an open letter to Megan on Facebook}}<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><gallery><br />
Image:085-ChrisChanWMegagi.jpg|Chris-Chan and Megagi touch their balls.<br />
Image:128-CChanMegagi.jpg<br />
Image:316-MegagiOriginal.jpg|Without breasts...<br />
Image:317-Megagi.jpg|...and with breasts<br />
</gallery></center><br />
<br />
==Sources==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==See also:==<br />
{{Fan art|chris=Megagi}} <br />
*[[Megan Schroeder]]<br />
*[[Sailor Megtune]]<br />
*[[Bionic the Hedgehog]]<br />
<br />
{{Sonichu}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Characters]]<br />
[[Category:Homos]]<br />
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Megagi_La_Skunk&diff=167747Megagi La Skunk2013-10-04T01:06:54Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:MegagiDecay.jpg|thumb|left|An example of Megagi's change in personality.]]<br />
[[Image:Megagi.jpg|thumb|Megagi's reaction to being included in Christian's shitty comic.]]<br />
<br />
{{quote|Whether or not you've noticed NONE of my original female characters have....breasts. I just don't believe in giving animals that kind of human quality.|Megan on Megagi, [[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007#Megan gives Chris a lesson in canine anatomy|6 March 2007]]}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|SHE DOES HAVE BREASTS. Megan Schroeder DREW THAT WAY.|Chris on Megagi, [[IRC (20 January 2009)]]}}<br />
<br />
'''Megagi La Skunk''' (pronounced [mɛˈgɑːdʒi], "megaudjy"<ref>[[Sonichu 6 Official Videobook]]</ref>) is one of [[Megan Schroeder]]'s furry-inspired characters who dates [[Bionic the Hedgehog]]. She has outlived her creator's presence in the comic, similar to [[Jiggliami]], except Megan was (probably) not a [[troll]]. <br />
<br />
Megagi was originally called '''Spunky Skunk''', which Chris didn't like because it might have reminded him of a rather [[Semen|nasty habit]]. She also did not have breasts in her original drawing or first appearances in the comic, but Chris added them in later for [[Mass debating|unknown reasons]].<br />
<br />
Given her name and color scheme, she likely constitutes a plagiarism of ''[[Wikipedia:Tiny Toon Adventures|Tiny Toon Adventures]]'' character [[Wikipedia:Fifi La Fume|Fifi La Fume]]. She may also be a ripoff of the Sonic character Fang the Sniper (Nack the Weasel), given her colour and design.<br />
<br />
Megagi is colored purple and pink. The same colors are used to symbolise [[homos|homosexual pride]].<br />
<br />
Worth noting is that Megagi was originally from [[Parody]] Island, where she probably lives with Megan's other traced [[Sonic]]/[[Pokémon]] hybrids, but the name was changed to [[Chris and religion|Parodyse]] Island in the comic.<br />
<br />
Megagi used to have somewhat of a different personality from the other female characters at first; she seemed to be the [[Silvana|tomboyish]] type, and Chris described her as being like an "Army Soldier". In [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]], she calls Chris out on his shit.<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/images/0/03/SchuComic6P21.jpg]</ref> Although her concept is still not so original, it was different from the typical [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]] who just liked shopping. However, in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], she gets watered down just like the rest of them - [[Women's rights|girly and no personality]] - and later on in the comic she is further reduced to being [[Bionic]]'s personal cheerleader.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
As of 2013 OCT 3 it appears Megagi is still in contact with Chris (in real life, mind you) and she shares his disgust with Megan.<br />
{{quote|By the way, I have checked with Megagi La Skunk; she feels deep distrust in you. We mutually agree that you should have never been born, even if it meant she would never exist.|Chris, in an open letter to Megan on Facebook}}<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><gallery><br />
Image:085-ChrisChanWMegagi.jpg|Chris-Chan and Megagi touch their balls.<br />
Image:128-CChanMegagi.jpg<br />
Image:316-MegagiOriginal.jpg|Without breasts...<br />
Image:317-Megagi.jpg|...and with breasts<br />
</gallery></center><br />
<br />
==Sources==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==See also:==<br />
{{Fan art|chris=Megagi}} <br />
*[[Megan Schroeder]]<br />
*[[Sailor Megtune]]<br />
*[[Bionic the Hedgehog]]<br />
<br />
{{Sonichu}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Characters]]<br />
[[Category:Homos]]<br />
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166763User:CaseHa2013-08-11T21:02:22Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>Hi! Name's CaseHa and I started following Chris during the [[Surfshack Tito]] saga.<br />
<br />
I'm Pikonic on the cwckiforums<br />
<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{Observer}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Straight|female}}<br />
{{Kitty}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166762User:CaseHa2013-08-11T20:57:05Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>Hi! Name's CaseHa and I started following Chris during the [[Surfshack Tito]] saga.<br />
<br />
I'm Pikonic on the cwckiforums<br />
<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{Observer}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Straight|female}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Talk:Megan_Schroeder&diff=166761Talk:Megan Schroeder2013-08-11T20:54:03Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>==To do==<br />
*Add photos of Megan, from the comic and from IRL<br />
*Talk about how she met Chris<br />
*Their relationship<br />
**A bit of clarification about Chris's purchases is in order. From the sounds of it, it sounded like Chris would bid on stuff for Megan off eBay since he had a credit card and Megan would pay him back, though in some cases it seems like Chris would give her presents and she went along with it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 08:28, 10 June 2009 (CEST)<br />
*Write separate article for Megan Saga, if need be<br />
<br />
==Photo of Megan + Bro from ED==<br />
*Have you seen it? He looks as though he could have some kind of mental disability. That could go a long way toward explaining how she was able to tolerate CWC for so long. Thoughts? --[[User:Doomknight|Doomknight]] 09:44, 9 June 2009 (CEST)<br />
: Link? [[User:Axe|Axe]] 10:21, 9 June 2009 (CEST)<br />
: http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan/People#Megan_Schroeder --[[User:Doomknight|Doomknight]] 20:38, 9 June 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
==To do==<br />
<br />
Whoever uploaded all the photos and shit, YOU'RE DOING A HECKUVA JOB. Keep it up.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 14:37, 3 February 2009 (CET)<br />
<br />
==Prologue and Afterword==<br />
Could someone cite the source of the Prologue text ("Eventually, light a magical lighthouse...") and the afterword ("Yet, one can't stay on such sweet passionate feelings ...")? It's lulzy stuff, but I just want to know the exact sauce. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 01:48, 18 March 2009 (CET)<br />
*Prologue was on his MySpace, it's long gone. It can be seen here [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&oldid=1997802418#The_Megan_Saga] The Afterword I can't find, I'm fairly sure it's from one of his blogs. Mirrored here [http://209.85.173.132/search?q=cache:FqdTi29vvXkJ:www.networksecurityarchive.org/html/FullDisclosure/2007-11/msg00098.html+%22for+now+I+walk+from+the+End+of+our+time+together%3B%22&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&client=firefox-a]--[[User:Robotnik|Robotnik]] 10:13, 10 April 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
==Megan Schroeder, a lesbian?==<br />
Possibly Homosexual? Must remember to investigate further. [[User:Janitor|Janitor]] 09:19, 6 April 2009 (CEST)<br />
* Wow, where did that one come from?? [[User:Sauerkraut131|Sauerkraut131]] 05:50, 19 May 2009 (CEST)<br />
*Nah. she just had a soldier fetish. Possibly nazi soldiers. [[User:garfunkel|garfunkel]]<br />
** Cite your source, bro. --[[User:Rafaal|Rafaal]] 21:41, 3 September 2009 (CEST)<br />
*I doubt that she's lesbian. Probably bisexual, but her sexual orientation isn't really important. Assuming she's straight as a board and completely secure with her sexuality, she'd never have liked Chris as anything more than a friend. Who can blame her, really?--[[User:Staypuft|Staypuft]] 03:22, 4 August 2009 (CEST)<br />
:Wait when has Megan at any time hinted to being attracted to women? [[User:Abyssal|Abyssal]] 00:55, 26 August 2010 (PDT)<br />
<br />
==Megan E-Mails==<br />
Just curious, is there anyway we can put those e-mails on a separate page? It REALLY detracts from the page overall. I've been wanting to, really, but I didn't know how you guys would take it for another page like that [[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 03:44 28 July 2009 (UST)<br />
*At the bequest of someone, it may be wise to make a page with just the Megan e-mails. It's redundant but some people want to look up shit just involving Megan and not wade through the other stuff. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:16, 10 September 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
== Nazi fetish ==<br />
<br />
Shouldn't it be mentioned somewhere? Also she's German lol. --[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 19:10, 21 September 2009 (CEST)<br />
*Nazi fetish? Sauce? [[User:Sonicow|Sonicow]] 20:31, 21 September 2009 (CEST)<br />
:*Megan asked Chris in a few e-mails to buy some pics of Nazi German soldiers off eBay and she'd remark how cute they are. Guess she had a thing for men in (Nazi) uniforms. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:54, 21 September 2009 (CEST)<br />
*Nazi fetish? Sounds like my kinda gal-pal.--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 22:45, 10 March 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
==Article Cleanup==<br />
<br />
This article REALLY needs some sort of clean up and bad! I'd do it, but I don't know where to begin, since I don't know what I should or shouldn't delete! --[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 16:00, 1 October 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
== Interview ==<br />
<br />
Has anyone E-Mailed Megan yet? Because, I have an idea for an exclusive interview with her. Is this a good idea to do an interview with her?--[[User:UJ1985|UJ1985]] 06:11, 23 October 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
* I think she's put this chapter of her life behind her and wants nothing to do with Chris or the trolling. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 07:30, 23 October 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
** yeah, lucas and mimms have said "her side of the story" has been told aka chris is retarded what more is there and both of them have stated that she doesn't want anything to do with this anymore. it's enough [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 08:34, 23 October 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
*Ah, ok then. I guess it's case closed then. --[[User:UJ1985|UJ1985]] 22:03, 23 October 2009 (CEST)<br />
***I'm surprised that no one has tried to contact her, though[[User:Double Nega|Double Nega]] 23:16, 4 March 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
== About the paragraph on Megan's brother ==<br />
<br />
I found this sentence a little bit odd:<br />
<br />
*"However, emails seem to imply that John is of regular intelligence and Megan had confirmed that none of her family members are autistic."<br />
<br />
Retardation and autism are two different things, so I don't see how a lack of autism in her family goes toward ruling out the possibility that John might be retarded. Plus, Megan's confirmation is already on the page in an email of Megan's to Chris, so it doesn't add new information. Does anyone else agree that this sentence can be shortened to everything before the first "and"? --[[User:Doomknight|Doomknight]] 09:45, 30 November 2009 (CET)<br />
<br />
== Pixelated picture of CWC and Megan ==<br />
<br />
I uploaded an unpixelated version of [[Image:Megan_Schroeder.jpg]] here: [[Image:ChrisAndMeganUnpixelated.jpg]].<br />
<br />
Given how disgusting a close-up on Chris can be, I'm not sure which is the better version, but if anyone wants an unedited version it's there. [[User:IanBrandonAnderson|IanBrandonAnderson]] 05:53, 7 December 2009 (CET)<br />
<br />
==Now I ain't sayin' she a gold-digga==<br />
<br />
...but a section with all the shit Chris bought for her would be pretty funny. --[[User:Dude|Dude]] 00:26, 24 December 2009 (CET)<br />
<br />
*Indeed!--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 21:36, 9 April 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
==TOW edits==<br />
<br />
Anyone with half a brain knows that's not her. I highly doubt she would put her first and last name in and then make edits reguarding Chris. Also, whoever uploaded the screencap and posted the new edit to the article was probably the fag who did it. Please delete that section. --[[User:Niggastolemyfamicom|Niggastolemyfamicom]] 22:30, 1 March 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
I edited her userpage.[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Meganshroeder]<br />
''I want to protect Chris despite the fact that he's an obese racist who has tried to rape me, posted crude pornographic drawings of me on the internet, is a stupid stubborn southerner with no regards to decency or law, a social and intellectual retard, gets ridiculed constantly, has been banned from numerous stores for soliciting sex, not to mention complete lack of fashion sense, an ego even more bloated than his gut. Yeah, I totally wanna suck his duck.'' If that stays up there, its a lulzy troll, if its off by tomorrow, its Megan.<br />
<br />
First of all, sign your comments. Second, that is incredibly retarded logic and I already know for a fact that was a troll. I'll be removing that section. If anyone has any questions my contact information is on my user page.--[[User:Niggastolemyfamicom|Niggastolemyfamicom]] 15:48, 15 March 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
== I dong know why this page is protected... ==<br />
<br />
...but anyway, Megan aparently lived in XXXXXXXXXXX in 2006. That may be interesting information to add. (Source is an e-mail from 2006). [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 08:26, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br />
:* The page is protected because Chris insisted that we took it down. This is in place to avoid the risk of anyone vandalizing it. Yes we can reverse it but it would be a drag. I also took the liberty to sensor your last entry. It is in our policy to not track down Megan on any reason. She's a victim of Chris's harassment and it would be painful of her If she got called over this by Trolls from ED. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 13:42, 21 March 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
== CWCpedia update ==<br />
<br />
Chris reverted the changes Daria made on Megan's page and it shows that chris still both hasn't let go of the fact that megan hated him and that the shecameforCWC.jpg picture wasn't pretty much a big deal and that its being used against him. here's the link http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Megan_Schroeder&curid=2648&diff=7034&oldid=7032 [[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 01:53, 17 May 2010 (UTC)<br />
*This Daria person is alright with me.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:52, 17 May 2010 (UTC)<br />
*That doesn't really surprise me, given Chris' past behavior on this matter...Still, Camacho has been rather useful these past few days. In the name of Dr. Ivo Robotnik, I believe Daria Camacho deserves a prrromotion. --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 00:12, 17 May 2010 (EST)<br />
**her passiveness has proven awesome, but who is this mysterious woman?[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 04:42, 17 May 2010 (UTC)<br />
**I think I can tell who she is.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 05:07, 17 May 2010 (UTC)<br />
***0_0 who is it?![[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 05:28, 17 May 2010 (UTC)<br />
***tell us pretty plox. also, when is her article being created?--[[User:Rosechupenis|Rosechupenis]] 06:54, 17 May 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
==Second Chop-Chop Video?==<br />
<br />
Hmm, that's interesting - the second Chop-Chop Master Onion Rap video (the one with the extra picture in it) is deleted (the link said it was removed). Did anyone save it?--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 04:28, 17 June 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
== Dead link ==<br />
<br />
During several automated bot runs the following external link was found to be unavailable. Please check if the link is in fact down and fix or remove it in that case!<br />
<br />
* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCo72hJ-SAg<br />
** In [[Megan Schroeder]] on 2011-09-20 22:39:20, 404 Not Found<br />
** In [[Megan Schroeder]] on 2011-09-28 08:18:29, 404 Not Found<br />
<br />
--[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 01:18, 28 September 2011 (PDT)<br />
<br />
==New Megan picture==<br />
A picture of Megan from 2012 is floating around on the Cwckiforums, do we add it here or should we leave it off out of respect for her?[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 13:54, 11 August 2013 (PDT)</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Clover_and_Snoopy&diff=166760Clover and Snoopy2013-08-11T20:40:19Z<p>CaseHa: /* Living Condition */</p>
<hr />
<div>{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" | Chandler Family<br />
|-<br />
| colspan="2" | [[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|300px]]<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" |Clover and Snoopy<br />
|-<br />
| '''Date of Birth'''<br />
| c. [[April 2012|April]] or [[May 2012]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Gender'''<br />
| Female (Clover)<br />Male (Snoopy)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Breed'''<br />
| Beagle<br />
|-<br />
| '''Owners'''<br />
| [[Barbara]]<br />[[Chris]]<br />
|-<br />
|}<br />
'''Clover and Snoopy''' (b. circa [[April 2012|April]]/[[May 2012]]<ref>According to their [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry], they were three months old when Chris entered them into the contest. Since registration to the contest began on 16 [[July 2012]] (see [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Rules.aspx?contestid=64810 contest rules]), this would mean they were born on either April or May.</ref>) are [[Chris]]'s new beagles. The general Chris community learned of their existence on 1 [[August 2012]], when a link to an [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry of them] Chris submitted to a [[Chris and contests#Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest|local contest]] was posted on the CWCki forums.<ref>[http://cwcki.forumer.com/chris-has-new-dogs-t2276972.html Chris has new dogs] (requires registration in order to view)</ref><br />
The contest ended on August 12th, and Chris didn't win.<br />
<br />
According to one of Chris's [[Facebook]] posts, Clover has a white mark on her snout, and Snoopy doesn't. Additionally, they each have an animal chew toy - Clover has a [[duck]], Snoopy a [[Chris and health#Hygiene|skunk.]]<br />
<br />
Clover probably derives her name from [[Patti-Chan]]'s origin story in [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]], which featured a four-leaf clover. Snoopy is named after the dog from ''[[Peanuts]]'', who was also a beagle.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:Mikmmp.jpg|"Snoopy has a hat on his tush, and Clover is looking at the camera."<br />
Image:Fbp4.png|Clover in a picture on [[Facebook]]<br />
Image:Twitter20June201301.png|Clover and Snoopy in a picture on [[Twitter]] from June 20, 2013.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
== Living Condition==<br />
On 6 August 2013, Chris posted on [[Facebook]] a picture of dog urine on a newspaper. It's assumed that since they're still using paper the dogs are not going outside, and most likely not getting exercise. This has angered many pet owning [[trolls]].<br />
{{quote| I have a strong feeling those dogs are obese, covered in fleas, and just sit around on a blanket all day and probably only get pet when Christian happens to look away from his vidya as they walk past him and he remembers "oh yeah, I have dogs" and gives them a quick pat on the rump. And I know for a fact they don't get bathed because the Chandlers can't even be fucked to bathe themselves, let alone their pets. And I'm also willing to bet they get fed the cheapest food the chandlers can buy.| [[https://www.cwckiforums.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=1858&start=60| From the Cwckiforums]] }}<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
{{People}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Pets]]<br />
<br />
<br />
{{stub}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Clover_and_Snoopy&diff=166759Clover and Snoopy2013-08-11T20:31:09Z<p>CaseHa: /* Living Condition */</p>
<hr />
<div>{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" | Chandler Family<br />
|-<br />
| colspan="2" | [[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|300px]]<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" |Clover and Snoopy<br />
|-<br />
| '''Date of Birth'''<br />
| c. [[April 2012|April]] or [[May 2012]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Gender'''<br />
| Female (Clover)<br />Male (Snoopy)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Breed'''<br />
| Beagle<br />
|-<br />
| '''Owners'''<br />
| [[Barbara]]<br />[[Chris]]<br />
|-<br />
|}<br />
'''Clover and Snoopy''' (b. circa [[April 2012|April]]/[[May 2012]]<ref>According to their [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry], they were three months old when Chris entered them into the contest. Since registration to the contest began on 16 [[July 2012]] (see [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Rules.aspx?contestid=64810 contest rules]), this would mean they were born on either April or May.</ref>) are [[Chris]]'s new beagles. The general Chris community learned of their existence on 1 [[August 2012]], when a link to an [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry of them] Chris submitted to a [[Chris and contests#Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest|local contest]] was posted on the CWCki forums.<ref>[http://cwcki.forumer.com/chris-has-new-dogs-t2276972.html Chris has new dogs] (requires registration in order to view)</ref><br />
The contest ended on August 12th, and Chris didn't win.<br />
<br />
According to one of Chris's [[Facebook]] posts, Clover has a white mark on her snout, and Snoopy doesn't. Additionally, they each have an animal chew toy - Clover has a [[duck]], Snoopy a [[Chris and health#Hygiene|skunk.]]<br />
<br />
Clover probably derives her name from [[Patti-Chan]]'s origin story in [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]], which featured a four-leaf clover. Snoopy is named after the dog from ''[[Peanuts]]'', who was also a beagle.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:Mikmmp.jpg|"Snoopy has a hat on his tush, and Clover is looking at the camera."<br />
Image:Fbp4.png|Clover in a picture on [[Facebook]]<br />
Image:Twitter20June201301.png|Clover and Snoopy in a picture on [[Twitter]] from June 20, 2013.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
== Living Condition==<br />
On 6 August 2013, Chris posted on [[Facebook]] a picture of dog urine on a newspaper. It's assumed that since they're still using paper the dogs are not going outside, and most likely not getting exercise. This has angered many pet owning [[trolls]].<br />
{{quote| I have a strong feeling those dogs are obese, covered in fleas, and just sit around on a blanket all day and probably only get pet when Christian happens to look away from his vidya as they walk past him and he remembers "oh yeah, I have dogs" and gives them a quick pat on the rump. And I know for a fact they don't get bathed because the Chandlers can't even be fucked to bathe themselves, let alone their pets. And I'm also willing to bet they get fed the cheapest food the chandlers can buy.| From the Cwckiforums }}<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
{{People}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Pets]]<br />
<br />
<br />
{{stub}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Clover_and_Snoopy&diff=166758Clover and Snoopy2013-08-11T20:22:09Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" | Chandler Family<br />
|-<br />
| colspan="2" | [[File:Clover and snoopy.jpg|300px]]<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" |Clover and Snoopy<br />
|-<br />
| '''Date of Birth'''<br />
| c. [[April 2012|April]] or [[May 2012]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Gender'''<br />
| Female (Clover)<br />Male (Snoopy)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Breed'''<br />
| Beagle<br />
|-<br />
| '''Owners'''<br />
| [[Barbara]]<br />[[Chris]]<br />
|-<br />
|}<br />
'''Clover and Snoopy''' (b. circa [[April 2012|April]]/[[May 2012]]<ref>According to their [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry], they were three months old when Chris entered them into the contest. Since registration to the contest began on 16 [[July 2012]] (see [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Rules.aspx?contestid=64810 contest rules]), this would mean they were born on either April or May.</ref>) are [[Chris]]'s new beagles. The general Chris community learned of their existence on 1 [[August 2012]], when a link to an [http://charlottesvilleradiogroup.upickem.net/engine/Details.aspx?p=A&c=64810&s=22437342&i=1&sort=DESCENDING#SD entry of them] Chris submitted to a [[Chris and contests#Dog Days of Summer Photo Contest|local contest]] was posted on the CWCki forums.<ref>[http://cwcki.forumer.com/chris-has-new-dogs-t2276972.html Chris has new dogs] (requires registration in order to view)</ref><br />
The contest ended on August 12th, and Chris didn't win.<br />
<br />
According to one of Chris's [[Facebook]] posts, Clover has a white mark on her snout, and Snoopy doesn't. Additionally, they each have an animal chew toy - Clover has a [[duck]], Snoopy a [[Chris and health#Hygiene|skunk.]]<br />
<br />
Clover probably derives her name from [[Patti-Chan]]'s origin story in [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]], which featured a four-leaf clover. Snoopy is named after the dog from ''[[Peanuts]]'', who was also a beagle.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:Mikmmp.jpg|"Snoopy has a hat on his tush, and Clover is looking at the camera."<br />
Image:Fbp4.png|Clover in a picture on [[Facebook]]<br />
Image:Twitter20June201301.png|Clover and Snoopy in a picture on [[Twitter]] from June 20, 2013.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
== Living Condition==<br />
On 6 August 2013, Chris posted on [[Facebook]] a picture of dog urine on a newspaper. It's assumed that since they're still using paper the dogs are not going outside, and most likely not getting exercise, angering many pet owning [[trolls]].<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
{{People}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Pets]]<br />
<br />
<br />
{{stub}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166408User:CaseHa2013-07-10T20:59:45Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>Hi! Name's CaseHa and I started following Chris during the [[Surfshack Tito]] saga.<br />
<br />
Things I'll get around too<br />
* draw some art<br />
* make sure the Sonichu comic gallery matches the appropriate pages<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{Observer}}<br />
{{Wii}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Straight|female}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166407User:CaseHa2013-07-10T20:53:34Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>This text is here so my name isn't red anymore HAHAHAHAHAHA<br />
<br />
Things I'll get around too<br />
* draw some art<br />
* make sure the Sonichu comic gallery matches the appropriate pages<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{Observer}}<br />
{{Wii}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166406User:CaseHa2013-07-10T20:51:34Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>This text is here so my name isn't red anymore HAHAHAHAHAHA<br />
<br />
Things I'll get around too<br />
* draw some art<br />
* make sure the Sonichu comic gallery matches the appropriate pages<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{Observer}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166405User:CaseHa2013-07-10T20:47:09Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>This text is here so my name isn't red anymore HAHAHAHAHAHA<br />
<br />
Things I'll get around too<br />
* draw some art<br />
* make sure the Sonichu comic gallery matches the appropriate pages<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Sweetheart}}<br />
{{Americunt}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166404User:CaseHa2013-07-10T20:46:20Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>This text is here so my name isn't red anymore HAHAHAHAHAHA<br />
<br />
Things I'll get around too<br />
* draw some art<br />
* make sure the Sonichu comic gallery matches the appropriate pages<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Sweetheart}}</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Ruckersville,_VA&diff=166366Ruckersville, VA2013-07-07T20:22:53Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{Quote| Ruckersville is a Very Boring, One-Horse Town. Hardly any young adults hang around here, and there is not much to do. Having a [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]] does not make it any better either. It's like putting lipstick on a skeleton, it does not make it any better or nicer.| Chris via [[Facebook]]}}<br />
<br />
'''Ruckersville, Virginia''' is the home of [[Christian Weston Chandler]] and the center of all things [[Sonichu]]-related. Chris and his family moved from Ruckersville to the Richmond suburbs after their dispute with the faculty of [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], only to return several years later.<br />
<br />
{| class="wikitable collapsible collapsed" align="right" border="1" <br />
| colspan="2"| [[Image:Ruckersville Aerial Map.jpg|250px]]<br />
|-<br />
| Location:<br />
| Ruckersville, VA<br />
|-<br />
| Coordinates:<br />
| [http://maps.google.ie/maps?ix=tea&oei=4gFBT8SvPM-EhQfd-s3KBQ&q=38%C2%B013%E2%80%B259%E2%80%B3+N,+78%C2%B022%E2%80%B209%E2%80%B3+W&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hq=&hnear=0x89b4720e575f8437:0x67ceca4bec34b85b,%2B38%C2%B0+13'+59.33%22,+-78%C2%B0+22'+8.96%22&gl=ie&ei=4wFBT9m_CsS3hQeRlJXTBQ&sa=X&oi=geocode_result&ct=title&resnum=1&ved=0CB8Q8gEwA 38°13′59″ N, 78°22′09″ W]<br />
|-<br />
| Classification:<br />
| Census-designated place<br />
|-<br />
| Established:<br />
| [[Pre-1980|1732]]<br />
|-<br />
| Population:<br />
| 1,141 ([[2011]])<br />
|-<br />
| ZIP code:<br />
| 22968<br />
|-<br />
| Area code:<br />
| 434<br />
|-<br />
| Website:<br />
| Unavailable<br />
|}<br />
<br />
==The Brochure==<br />
Ruckersville, Virginia is a small census-designated place on the outskirts of [[Charlottesville, VA]]. A scenic, tight-knit community that offers panoramic views of mountains, trees and farmland. Although Ruckersville has a small population, it has a vibrant and growing downtown, notable for its antiques market, a new [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]] and great potential for expansion. Founded in 1732, the town has changed very little. The quiet, peaceful village of long ago is still the quiet, peaceful township of today. A safe, friendly, and welcoming community in which to [[Christian Weston Chandler|raise a family]] or [[Bob Chandler|quietly retire]].<br />
<br />
==The Truth==<br />
[[Image:Ruckersville Attractions.png|thumb|According to [[the Internet]], there is literally nothing worthy of note in Ruckersville.]]<br />
<br />
It's a redneck shithole full of cheap, ugly houses and even uglier lawn furniture. It's a place where people burn their trash and decorate their yards with junked cars, where the human disasters we know as the "[[Chandler Family Tree|Chandlers]]" can go ignored and unnoticed (that is if you don't know who they are). Ruckersville has very little in the way of [[14 Branchland Court|recognizable landmarks]], history, and the only noteworthy person born there is NASCAR driver [[Tobacky|Phillip Morris]]. While most normal young people would resent being stuck in a redneck wonderland like Ruckersville, the lack of prospects or opportunities suits Chris, as it's just one more excuse to never leave his room, let alone get a job.<br />
<br />
Chris claims to hate living in Ruckersville, as evidenced by his complaints in various [[Greene County Conspiracy|videos]], but only because he'd rather be in a near-identical suburb where he thinks he could live in a permanent time-capsule of his [[Manchester High School|high school]] days forever.<br />
<br />
==Geography==<br />
The geography of Ruckersville is rather plain, composed mainly of fields, light forest, and small ugly housing developments extending from the larger town of Charlottesville. Even the terrain is boring. Ruckersville really is a place for people who prefer to do absolutely nothing with their lives at all.<br />
<br />
Ruckersville is far from any real civilization: about 100 miles (160 km) from [[Barack Obama|Washington, D.C.]], 16 miles (26 km) from [[Charlottesville]] and 77 miles (123 km) from [[Richmond]].<br />
<br />
==Crime==<br />
Crime rates in Ruckersville are unexpectedly low, with zero murders and only two rapes on [[Chris and sex|record]]. That said, nearby Charlottesville is the regional heart of commerce and entertainment. If Chris is more than happy to waltz over there to [[Chris and the Law|commit his various misdemeanors]], likely so are most others.<br />
<br />
==Culture==<br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|lolculture]]<br />
<br />
==Ground Zero==<br />
It's interesting to note that, until very recently, a ''Google Street View'' of the housing development that contains Chris's home was unavailable. It's likely that the road is so poorly marked and difficult to access that the Google camera trucks either missed it, ignored it, or simply did not care. The current satellite images are copyrighted 2012 to the Commonwealth of Virginia, indicating that until this year even Virginia didn't give a fuck about its shitty backwater 'burbs.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:Ruckersville_Aerial_Map.jpg|Aerial shot of the redneck shithole that is Ruckersville. Chris's home is highlighted with the red mark.<br />
Image:14 branchland court gmaps.png|A closeup view of where the magic happens<br />
Image:Goin_to_Ruckersville.jpg|Ruckersville lies at the intersection of two major highways. WOW!<br />
Image:Ruckersville_Church.jpg|No redneck town is complete without churches and replaceable letter signs.<br />
Image:Story_of_Ruckersville.jpg|Little did Peter Rucker know that his settlement would be a haven for moronic Man-children. <br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[14 Branchland Court]]<br />
*[[Charlottesville, VA]]<br />
*[[Chris's room]]<br />
*[[DayOut]]<br />
==External links==<br />
*[[Wikipedia:Ruckersville,_Virginia|Wikipedia article]]<br />
*[http://www.virginia.org/Cities/Ruckersville/ Tourism info]<br />
{{Places}}<br />
[[Category:Places]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Ruckersville,_VA&diff=166365Ruckersville, VA2013-07-07T20:15:41Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{Quote| Ruckersville is a Very Boring, One-Horse Town. Hardly any young adults hang around here, and there is not much to do. Having a Wal-Mart does not make it any better either. It's like putting lipstick on a skeleton, it does not make it any better or nicer.| Chris via [[Facebook]]}}<br />
<br />
'''Ruckersville, Virginia''' is the home of [[Christian Weston Chandler]] and the center of all things [[Sonichu]]-related. Chris and his family moved from Ruckersville to the Richmond suburbs after their dispute with the faculty of [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], only to return several years later.<br />
<br />
{| class="wikitable collapsible collapsed" align="right" border="1" <br />
| colspan="2"| [[Image:Ruckersville Aerial Map.jpg|250px]]<br />
|-<br />
| Location:<br />
| Ruckersville, VA<br />
|-<br />
| Coordinates:<br />
| [http://maps.google.ie/maps?ix=tea&oei=4gFBT8SvPM-EhQfd-s3KBQ&q=38%C2%B013%E2%80%B259%E2%80%B3+N,+78%C2%B022%E2%80%B209%E2%80%B3+W&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hq=&hnear=0x89b4720e575f8437:0x67ceca4bec34b85b,%2B38%C2%B0+13'+59.33%22,+-78%C2%B0+22'+8.96%22&gl=ie&ei=4wFBT9m_CsS3hQeRlJXTBQ&sa=X&oi=geocode_result&ct=title&resnum=1&ved=0CB8Q8gEwA 38°13′59″ N, 78°22′09″ W]<br />
|-<br />
| Classification:<br />
| Census-designated place<br />
|-<br />
| Established:<br />
| [[Pre-1980|1732]]<br />
|-<br />
| Population:<br />
| 1,141 ([[2011]])<br />
|-<br />
| ZIP code:<br />
| 22968<br />
|-<br />
| Area code:<br />
| 434<br />
|-<br />
| Website:<br />
| Unavailable<br />
|}<br />
<br />
==The Brochure==<br />
Ruckersville, Virginia is a small census-designated place on the outskirts of [[Charlottesville, VA]]. A scenic, tight-knit community that offers panoramic views of mountains, trees and farmland. Although Ruckersville has a small population, it has a vibrant and growing downtown, notable for its antiques market, a new [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]] and great potential for expansion. Founded in 1732, the town has changed very little. The quiet, peaceful village of long ago is still the quiet, peaceful township of today. A safe, friendly, and welcoming community in which to [[Christian Weston Chandler|raise a family]] or [[Bob Chandler|quietly retire]].<br />
<br />
==The Truth==<br />
[[Image:Ruckersville Attractions.png|thumb|According to [[the Internet]], there is literally nothing worthy of note in Ruckersville.]]<br />
<br />
It's a redneck shithole full of cheap, ugly houses and even uglier lawn furniture. It's a place where people burn their trash and decorate their yards with junked cars, where the human disasters we know as the "[[Chandler Family Tree|Chandlers]]" can go ignored and unnoticed (that is if you don't know who they are). Ruckersville has very little in the way of [[14 Branchland Court|recognizable landmarks]], history, and the only noteworthy person born there is NASCAR driver [[Tobacky|Phillip Morris]]. While most normal young people would resent being stuck in a redneck wonderland like Ruckersville, the lack of prospects or opportunities suits Chris, as it's just one more excuse to never leave his room, let alone get a job.<br />
<br />
Chris claims to hate living in Ruckersville, as evidenced by his complaints in various [[Greene County Conspiracy|videos]], but only because he'd rather be in a near-identical suburb where he thinks he could live in a permanent time-capsule of his [[Manchester High School|high school]] days forever.<br />
<br />
==Geography==<br />
The geography of Ruckersville is rather plain, composed mainly of fields, light forest, and small ugly housing developments extending from the larger town of Charlottesville. Even the terrain is boring. Ruckersville really is a place for people who prefer to do absolutely nothing with their lives at all.<br />
<br />
Ruckersville is far from any real civilization: about 100 miles (160 km) from [[Barack Obama|Washington, D.C.]], 16 miles (26 km) from [[Charlottesville]] and 77 miles (123 km) from [[Richmond]].<br />
<br />
==Crime==<br />
Crime rates in Ruckersville are unexpectedly low, with zero murders and only two rapes on [[Chris and sex|record]]. That said, nearby Charlottesville is the regional heart of commerce and entertainment. If Chris is more than happy to waltz over there to [[Chris and the Law|commit his various misdemeanors]], likely so are most others.<br />
<br />
==Culture==<br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|lolculture]]<br />
<br />
==Ground Zero==<br />
It's interesting to note that, until very recently, a ''Google Street View'' of the housing development that contains Chris's home was unavailable. It's likely that the road is so poorly marked and difficult to access that the Google camera trucks either missed it, ignored it, or simply did not care. The current satellite images are copyrighted 2012 to the Commonwealth of Virginia, indicating that until this year even Virginia didn't give a fuck about its shitty backwater 'burbs.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:Ruckersville_Aerial_Map.jpg|Aerial shot of the redneck shithole that is Ruckersville. Chris's home is highlighted with the red mark.<br />
Image:14 branchland court gmaps.png|A closeup view of where the magic happens<br />
Image:Goin_to_Ruckersville.jpg|Ruckersville lies at the intersection of two major highways. WOW!<br />
Image:Ruckersville_Church.jpg|No redneck town is complete without churches and replaceable letter signs.<br />
Image:Story_of_Ruckersville.jpg|Little did Peter Rucker know that his settlement would be a haven for moronic Man-children. <br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[14 Branchland Court]]<br />
*[[Charlottesville, VA]]<br />
*[[Chris's room]]<br />
*[[DayOut]]<br />
==External links==<br />
*[[Wikipedia:Ruckersville,_Virginia|Wikipedia article]]<br />
*[http://www.virginia.org/Cities/Ruckersville/ Tourism info]<br />
{{Places}}<br />
[[Category:Places]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166145User:CaseHa2013-06-21T23:00:44Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>This text is here so my name isn't red anymore HAHAHAHAHAHA<br />
<br />
Things I'll get around too<br />
* draw some art<br />
* make sure the Sonichu comic gallery matches the appropriate pages</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:CaseHa&diff=166144User:CaseHa2013-06-21T23:00:06Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>This text is here so my name isn't red anymore HAHAHAHAHAHA<br />
<br />
Things I'll get around too<br />
* draw some art<br />
* make sure the Sonichu comic gallery matches the appropriate page.</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Hair&diff=166143Hair2013-06-21T22:55:05Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Baldtotheextreme.jpg|thumb|right|"I am not balding; I had a haircut in that video that started that Damn Rumor."]]<br />
<br />
Soaked with grease and rapidly falling off, [[Chris]]'s '''hair''' is one of the many indicators of his unhealthy lifestyle.<br />
<br />
Already in atrocious physical condition for someone his age, Chris's baldness has made him look creepier and even more like a [[pedofork|pedophile]] and/or fat, old lesbian. His refusal to regularly bathe, which leaves his hair greasy and unmanageable, and his occasional attempts at crafting a combover haven't helped matters. <br />
<br />
A popular theory amongst [[trolls]] proposes that the baldness is a physical indicator of the [[stress]] Chris claims they put him through. More likely, though, Chris just drew an unlucky ticket in the genetic lottery. Photos of his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] show that Cole lost his hair up front relatively early in life as well, and [[Bob]] was bald as well. However, inactivity, poor diet, illness, and stress are well known to accelerate the balding process. In addition, there is a strong correlation between the man's age with the eventual extent of the baldness - when male-pattern baldness starts as early as it does with Chris, you will tend to end up with much less hair in the end; which does not bode well for Chris's [[tomgirl]] dreams.<br />
<br />
Naturally, Chris being Chris, he thinks his hair looks just fine. During the first [[Kacey Phone Call]], he enthusiastically (while pretending to be [[Liquid]]) [[Chris and his Ego|praised said haircut]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his [[Barbara Chandler|mom]] probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh... I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.}}<br />
<br />
If you were at all surprised to learn that Chris doesn't bother to go to a decent barber, but instead lets his mom cut his hair...well, you're new here, aren't you?[[Image:FutureCWC.jpg|thumb|What Chris will look like by next December.]]<br />
<br />
When confronted in the [[Mailbag]] ([[Mailbag 17#Chris's receding hairline disagrees|17]], [[Mailbag 25#Balding issues|25]] and [[Mailbag 28#He's also going bald|28]]) about his obviously thinning hair, Chris was, as per usual, completely in denial.<br />
<br />
In videos taken of Chris at a [[Fridays After Five]] event, a bald spot is seen starting to appear on the back of his head.<br />
<br />
[[File:TG9.jpg|thumb|Chris with longer hair]]<br />
[[File:Chris Long Hair.jpg|thumb|Chris with shoulder length hair.]]<br />
[[File:Hemanchristian.jpg|thumb|Tomgirl of Eternia]]<br />
<br />
Since becoming a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]], Chris has let his hair grow out and has seemingly attempted to color it blonde. This was likely not done by a professional stylist, because his new hair color is a hideous urine yellow. In some photos, such as the one he took at Salvation Army, the darker roots are visible through his extremely thin hair. It also appears that Chris's hair is naturally curly or wavy when he lets it grow long. Another possibility is that he curls his hair with a curling iron, although Chris is far too lax in his personal grooming for that type of styling regimen. An [[October 2012]] [[Facebook]] profile picture revealed Chris has grown his hair shoulder length.<br />
<br />
In [[May 2011]], Barb forced Chris to have his hair cut. This resulted in Chris calling Barb a bitch. Chris saved the hair and wore it around his neck in hopes it would grow back faster. <ref>http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_26</ref><br />
<br />
{{quote| This was supposed to be the Year of Me; I was making Best Social Progress with the [[Wikipedia: Mary Tyler Moore|Mary Tyler Moore]] hairstyle, with Better Self-Confidence; Gone in a snip snip snip of my mother's claws. I also have retrieved the hair clippings shortly after the tragedy, gathered them in a clump, wrapped the clump in a plastic wrap, put it in a plush, satin-like baggie, attached a necklace to it, and [[Chris and religion|I am wearing my clippings as a Charm to prayfully promote quicker hair growth and recovery.]]|Chris, thinking a 1970s woman's hairstyle helps you get [[China|friends]]}}<br />
<br />
==Hair mail==<br />
Cassie, co-founder of [[Sonichu Girls]], asked Chris for locks of his hairs so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as a souvenir.<br />
<br />
Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Troll|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair, placing it into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big [[China|C]] himself.<br />
<br />
Due to the Mexican postal service ([[Chris and race#Hispanics|insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here]]), it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.<br />
<br />
Cassie described the hair as being "greasy" and having an odd odor. Evidently, Chris's hair is so filthy, the Mexican postal service, which regularly "unknowingly" ships countless pounds of cocaine, marijuana, and other illegal narcotics per year, had trouble dealing with this biohazard. Fortunately, this violation of [http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode06/usc_sec_06_00001203----000-.html United States Code: Title 16, Chapter 4, SubChapter IV, § 1203 (a)(4-7)] did not cause any national or international incidents.<br />
<br />
While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's version of Spanish, with each side having a [[Sonichu]] drawing, where the [[Spanish]] side has [[Chris and race|Sonichu in a sombrero]].<br />
<br />
==Gallery of hair==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.<br />
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire collection of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])<br />
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it was his.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and health]]<br />
*[[HairDifference]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Hair&diff=166142Hair2013-06-21T22:53:48Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Baldtotheextreme.jpg|thumb|right|"I am not balding; I had a haircut in that video that started that Damn Rumor."]]<br />
<br />
Soaked with grease and rapidly falling off, [[Chris]]'s '''hair''' is one of the many indicators of his unhealthy lifestyle.<br />
<br />
Already in atrocious physical condition for someone his age, Chris's baldness has made him look creepier and even more like a [[pedofork|pedophile]] and/or fat, old lesbian. His refusal to regularly bathe, which leaves his hair greasy and unmanageable, and his occasional attempts at crafting a combover haven't helped matters. <br />
<br />
A popular theory amongst [[trolls]] proposes that the baldness is a physical indicator of the [[stress]] Chris claims they put him through. More likely, though, Chris just drew an unlucky ticket in the genetic lottery. Photos of his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] show that Cole lost his hair up front relatively early in life as well, and [[Bob]] was bald as well. However, inactivity, poor diet, illness, and stress are well known to accelerate the balding process. In addition, there is a strong correlation between the man's age with the eventual extent of the baldness - when male-pattern baldness starts as early as it does with Chris, you will tend to end up with much less hair in the end; which does not bode well for Chris's [[tomgirl]] dreams.<br />
<br />
Naturally, Chris being Chris, he thinks his hair looks just fine. During the first [[Kacey Phone Call]], he enthusiastically (while pretending to be [[Liquid]]) [[Chris and his Ego|praised said haircut]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his [[Barbara Chandler|mom]] probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh... I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.}}<br />
<br />
If you were at all surprised to learn that Chris doesn't bother to go to a decent barber, but instead lets his mom cut his hair...well, you're new here, aren't you?[[Image:FutureCWC.jpg|thumb|What Chris will look like by next December.]]<br />
<br />
When confronted in the [[Mailbag]] ([[Mailbag 17#Chris's receding hairline disagrees|17]], [[Mailbag 25#Balding issues|25]] and [[Mailbag 28#He's also going bald|28]]) about his obviously thinning hair, Chris was, as per usual, completely in denial.<br />
<br />
In videos taken of Chris at a [[Fridays After Five]] event, a bald spot is seen starting to appear on the back of his head.<br />
<br />
[[File:TG9.jpg|thumb|Chris with longer hair]]<br />
[[File:Chris Long Hair.jpg|thumb|Chris with shoulder length hair.]]<br />
[[File:Hemanchristian.jpg|thumb|Tomgirl of Eternia]]<br />
<br />
Since becoming a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]], Chris has let his hair grow out and has seemingly attempted to color it blonde. This was likely not done by a professional stylist, because his new hair color is a hideous urine yellow. In some photos, such as the one he took at Salvation Army, the darker roots are visible through his extremely thin hair. It also appears that Chris's hair is naturally curly or wavy when he lets it grow long. Another possibility is that he curls his hair with a curling iron, although Chris is far too lax in his personal grooming for that type of styling regimen. An [[October 2012]] [[Facebook]] profile picture revealed Chris has grown his hair shoulder length.<br />
<br />
In [[May 2011]], Barb forced Chris to have his hair cut. This resulted in Chris calling Barb a bitch. Chris saved the hair and wore it around his neck in hopes it would grow back faster. <ref>http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_26</ref><br />
<br />
{{quote| This was supposed to be the Year of Me; I was making Best Social Progress with the Mary Tyler Moore hairstyle, with Better Self-Confidence; Gone in a snip snip snip of my mother's claws. I also have retrieved the hair clippings shortly after the tragedy, gathered them in a clump, wrapped the clump in a plastic wrap, put it in a plush, satin-like baggie, attached a necklace to it, and [[Chris and religion|I am wearing my clippings as a Charm to prayfully promote quicker hair growth and recovery.]]|Chris, thinking a 1970s woman's hairstyle helps you get [[China|friends]]}}<br />
<br />
==Hair mail==<br />
Cassie, co-founder of [[Sonichu Girls]], asked Chris for locks of his hairs so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as a souvenir.<br />
<br />
Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Troll|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair, placing it into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big [[China|C]] himself.<br />
<br />
Due to the Mexican postal service ([[Chris and race#Hispanics|insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here]]), it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.<br />
<br />
Cassie described the hair as being "greasy" and having an odd odor. Evidently, Chris's hair is so filthy, the Mexican postal service, which regularly "unknowingly" ships countless pounds of cocaine, marijuana, and other illegal narcotics per year, had trouble dealing with this biohazard. Fortunately, this violation of [http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode06/usc_sec_06_00001203----000-.html United States Code: Title 16, Chapter 4, SubChapter IV, § 1203 (a)(4-7)] did not cause any national or international incidents.<br />
<br />
While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's version of Spanish, with each side having a [[Sonichu]] drawing, where the [[Spanish]] side has [[Chris and race|Sonichu in a sombrero]].<br />
<br />
==Gallery of hair==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.<br />
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire collection of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])<br />
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it was his.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and health]]<br />
*[[HairDifference]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Hair&diff=166141Hair2013-06-21T22:49:28Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Baldtotheextreme.jpg|thumb|right|"I am not balding; I had a haircut in that video that started that Damn Rumor."]]<br />
<br />
Soaked with grease and rapidly falling off, [[Chris]]'s '''hair''' is one of the many indicators of his unhealthy lifestyle.<br />
<br />
Already in atrocious physical condition for someone his age, Chris's baldness has made him look creepier and even more like a [[pedofork|pedophile]] and/or fat, old lesbian. His refusal to regularly bathe, which leaves his hair greasy and unmanageable, and his occasional attempts at crafting a combover haven't helped matters. <br />
<br />
A popular theory amongst [[trolls]] proposes that the baldness is a physical indicator of the [[stress]] Chris claims they put him through. More likely, though, Chris just drew an unlucky ticket in the genetic lottery. Photos of his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] show that Cole lost his hair up front relatively early in life as well, and [[Bob]] was bald as well. However, inactivity, poor diet, illness, and stress are well known to accelerate the balding process. In addition, there is a strong correlation between the man's age with the eventual extent of the baldness - when male-pattern baldness starts as early as it does with Chris, you will tend to end up with much less hair in the end; which does not bode well for Chris's [[tomgirl]] dreams.<br />
<br />
Naturally, Chris being Chris, he thinks his hair looks just fine. During the first [[Kacey Phone Call]], he enthusiastically (while pretending to be [[Liquid]]) [[Chris and his Ego|praised said haircut]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his [[Barbara Chandler|mom]] probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh... I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.}}<br />
<br />
If you were at all surprised to learn that Chris doesn't bother to go to a decent barber, but instead lets his mom cut his hair...well, you're new here, aren't you?[[Image:FutureCWC.jpg|thumb|What Chris will look like by next December.]]<br />
<br />
When confronted in the [[Mailbag]] ([[Mailbag 17#Chris's receding hairline disagrees|17]], [[Mailbag 25#Balding issues|25]] and [[Mailbag 28#He's also going bald|28]]) about his obviously thinning hair, Chris was, as per usual, completely in denial.<br />
<br />
In videos taken of Chris at a [[Fridays After Five]] event, a bald spot is seen starting to appear on the back of his head.<br />
<br />
[[File:TG9.jpg|thumb|Chris with longer hair]]<br />
[[File:Chris Long Hair.jpg|thumb|Chris with shoulder length hair.]]<br />
[[File:Hemanchristian.jpg|thumb|Tomgirl of Eternia]]<br />
<br />
Since becoming a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]], Chris has let his hair grow out and has seemingly attempted to color it blonde. This was likely not done by a professional stylist, because his new hair color is a hideous urine yellow. In some photos, such as the one he took at Salvation Army, the darker roots are visible through his extremely thin hair. It also appears that Chris's hair is naturally curly or wavy when he lets it grow long. Another possibility is that he curls his hair with a curling iron, although Chris is far too lax in his personal grooming for that type of styling regimen. An [[October 2012]] [[Facebook]] profile picture revealed Chris has grown his hair shoulder length.<br />
<br />
In [[May 2011]], Barb forced Chris to have his hair cut. This resulted in Chris calling Barb a bitch. Chris saved the hair and wore it around his neck in hopes it would grow back faster. <ref>http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_26</ref><br />
<br />
{{quote| This was supposed to be the Year of Me; I was making Best Social Progress with the Mary Tyler Moore hairstyle, with Better Self-Confidence; Gone in a snip snip snip of my mother's claws. I also have retrieved the hair clippings shortly after the tragedy, gathered them in a clump, wrapped the clump in a plastic wrap, put it in a plush, satin-like baggie, attached a necklace to it, and [[Chris and religion|I am wearing my clippings as a Charm to prayfully promote quicker hair growth and recovery.]]}}<br />
<br />
==Hair mail==<br />
Cassie, co-founder of [[Sonichu Girls]], asked Chris for locks of his hairs so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as a souvenir.<br />
<br />
Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Troll|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair, placing it into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big [[China|C]] himself.<br />
<br />
Due to the Mexican postal service ([[Chris and race#Hispanics|insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here]]), it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.<br />
<br />
Cassie described the hair as being "greasy" and having an odd odor. Evidently, Chris's hair is so filthy, the Mexican postal service, which regularly "unknowingly" ships countless pounds of cocaine, marijuana, and other illegal narcotics per year, had trouble dealing with this biohazard. Fortunately, this violation of [http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode06/usc_sec_06_00001203----000-.html United States Code: Title 16, Chapter 4, SubChapter IV, § 1203 (a)(4-7)] did not cause any national or international incidents.<br />
<br />
While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's version of Spanish, with each side having a [[Sonichu]] drawing, where the [[Spanish]] side has [[Chris and race|Sonichu in a sombrero]].<br />
<br />
==Gallery of hair==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.<br />
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire collection of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])<br />
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it was his.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and health]]<br />
*[[HairDifference]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Dreams&diff=166030Dreams2013-06-11T19:59:22Z<p>CaseHa: /* Grim Reaper dream */</p>
<hr />
<div><br />
{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[File:449-CWCDreamCatcher.JPG|thumb|Authentic [[Cherokian]] dream catcher.]]<br />
[[Image:CWCletter.jpg|thumb|right|The letter to Blanca, a classic example of Chris's prophetic powers in action.]]<br />
Nowadays, it is widely accepted that '''dreams''' can provide valuable insight into the mind of the dreamer. While they represent, at best, a warped reflection of what goes on in the unconscious mind, dreams are nevertheless made up of more than just random, meaningless images.<br />
<br />
[[Chris]] adheres to a simpler, primitive belief in the significance of dreams. It's part and parcel of his religious mysticism — he believes many of his dreams are messages from God, as if he were a modern day [[wikipedia:Book Of Daniel|Daniel.]] Dreams, in Chris's mind, can provide accurate portents of the future, and much of his strange behavior may be connected to his attempts to make these dreams into reality.<br />
<br />
==Significant dreams==<br />
<br />
Chris has often claimed that his dreams represent communications from the divine. On [[IRC (02 January 2009)|IRC]], when asked about his purpose in life, he explained it like so: "To eventually be married to my Sweetheart, then give birth and raise my daughter, as God has pointed it out for me in my dream." Likewise, when [[PandaHalo]] asked him why he wanted a daughter so badly, he said, "it was fortold to me in multiple dreams."<br />
<br />
During the [[Father Call]], when Matthew Devoria pointed out that his belief in prophetic dreams was both highly unlikely and potentially blasphemous, Chris was willing to back off from some of the weirder implications of his philosophy. "I am not saying that I am a prophet," he admitted. However, he continued to cling to the belief that his dreams represent the future. "I'm not saying that it is the definite future," he explained, "but that it is a POSSIBLE future."<br />
<br />
It could be that Chris believes that [[Chris and religion|God]] gives him these "visions of the future" in order to comfort him with the knowledge that he will, in fact, triumph in the face of adversity and [[autism]]. Chris himself has, on several occasions, shown that he fears suspense and uncertainty and it wouldn't be a great leap of reason to assume that he thinks [[Chris and his Ego|God is personally tossing him spoilers for his own life]] in much the same way as Chris slathers them onto [[Sonichu]].<br />
<br />
When a letter in [[Mailbag 55]] called Chris out on his insane belief, his response was to ask "What is YOUR Dream Career?", suggesting that he has misinterpreted various dream-related expressions such as "the woman of my dreams" or "my dream job". While the expressions actually mean "It would be dreamlike to have a job like that or a wife like her", Chris may take it to mean "God literally showed this job/woman to me in a dream".<br />
<br />
Chris has discussed several of his more important or influential dreams in many of his comics, chats, and videos. There may be a great many more that he's never felt like sharing with the outside world, so this section is by no means comprehensive, but it should at least provide a basic overview of the sort of prophecies Chris believes that he receives.<br />
<br />
===The Crystal dream===<br />
{{quote|I have my dreams that God gave to me, and I have to see my Crystal Weston Chandler be Born.|Chris, [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]]}}<br />
<br />
By far the most significant of Chris's dreams is this one, where he saw himself married to an unspecified woman and raising a daughter named [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]]. This represents the genesis of his [[Love Quest]], or at any rate his favorite excuse. When he's not willing to admit that what he really wants is [[china|pussy]], Chris claims that his search for a sweetheart is intended to fulfill God's will and produce his prophesied daughter.<br />
<br />
{{quote|You see, I have a dream, I have my dream, and that dream is to give birth, to have, to share a daughter with my wife-to-be, and her name would be Crystal.|Chris, during the [[Father Call]].}}<br />
<br />
Chris, always one to share too much personal information during conversations with strangers, sometimes brings up the Crystal dream while introducing himself to people. In one of his [[Facebook_messages#Christy_Backe|Facebook conversations]], he sent a new contact the following question: "Do you know any 18-25-year old single women who might like me? I would appreciate any help I can get in finding the one who would be my Sweetheart, and help me realize my dream of me fathering a pretty daughter named Crystal Weston Chandler."<br />
<br />
For some time, the many trolls following Chris operated according to the belief that the dream took place when he was around 21 years old, right around the formal beginning of the Love Quest. During the [[Father Call]], however, Chris very clearly stated that he had the dream when he was in elementary school, between seven and nine years of age. In that description of the dream, he also noted that he "had, like, an office job" in his future life, an embellishment that smacks of Chris attempting to impress [[Kacey]]'s father.<br />
<br />
This statement, however, predates the Father Call. In an [[Katie_Bay_E-mails_3#7.2F28.2F09|email sent to Katie Bay]] near the end of July 2009, Chris used this dream as an excuse to not get a job. Specifically, he expressed annoyance that he does not know what kind of job he has in the dream, only that he is working in an office building, his daughter is present, and shortly after the dream begins the building starts to collapse and he needs to run away with Crystal.<br />
<br />
Chris's dreams about his future daughter are at least partially responsible for his refusal to date black women. In [[Mailbag 35]], he explained, "I never saw a black woman being my wife in any of my dreams of me and my white baby daughter."<br />
<br />
===Grim Reaper dream===<br />
In a dream some time before 2005, Chris met the [[Wikipedia:Death (personification)|Grim Reaper]]: <br />
{{Quote|I understand [[Bob Chandler|my dad]] does not have long to live, but I have to ask while you're here, when will you be taking my father? He informed me that he would not claim his soul until the year 2015.|From [[Jackie E-mails 31]]}}<br />
Chris found this comforting, but was enraged with the Grim Reaper (the ultimate [[troll]]) when he took Bob's soul in [[2011]].<br />
{{Quote| Damn you, Reaper, this is Two Thousand Eleven! I Was Promised that we'd be blessed with father's presence for Four More Years! [[Chris and his ego|I Was Promised!!!]]|Chris, cursing Death for not giving him<br />
what he is entitled to}}<br />
<br />
===The Blanca dream===<br />
During the late summer and early fall of [[2008]], Chris wildly ping-ponged back and forth between a number of potential [[trolls|sweethearts]], including [[PandaHalo]], [[Sarah Jackson]], and [[Blanca Weiss]]. On September 29, however, he finally settled on Blanca, having supposedly experienced a dream where he met her in the lobby of a [[Charlottesville]] hotel.<br />
<br />
Chris describes the dream in some detail in his [[Blanca_Emails,_September_2008#Chris_dreams_of_Blanca|e-mails to Blanca]], as well as the [[Chris's Letter to Blanca|letter]] he sent to her along with his medallions. <br />
<br />
{{quote|I FINALLY HAD my Dream that I have been waiting for for soo long; the dream revealing the name of my Sweetheart-to-be. the scenario was simply, after talking to her over the internet, I went to the local Hotel to meet her, and her name came up Often, and was Burned into my Memory and my Heart...SHE is YOU. :) YOU, Blanca Weiss, ARE MY SWEETHEART-TO-BE!|Chris, falling for it on a number of levels.}}<br />
<br />
He also mentioned the dream on his [[The OFFICIAL Sonichu & Rosechu Blog|blog]], claiming that "[[God and Jesus]] have revealed to me the name of my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be." Three weeks later, the object of Chris's divinely-inspired love dumped him (after dumping his beloved [[medallions]] in [[pickle]] brine).<br />
<br />
===The PandaHalo dream===<br />
Although breaking up with Blanca temporarily sent Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 21st, 2008|crashing into slumber]], he recovered from the trauma quickly enough with the aid of his dear friend PandaHalo. By mid-November, he was having wet dreams about her and sharing the details in their communications, which Panda promptly passed on to her fellow trolls on [[IRC (26 November 2008)|IRC]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|During my most recent dream, You were in it. You were alone in your apartment; I had just run in to see you. We talked for a bit, but then you and I, we made out, then got naked and lost our virgin ways to each other. It got soo goodly hot and wild, that I came in my sleep over you.|Chris, traumatizing a chatroom full of trolls.}}<br />
<br />
If this particular dream also happened to be a prophecy, GodJesus must have gotten his wires crossed. Chris never met Panda in person, and had more or less gotten over her long before she allegedly died early in 2009.<br />
<br />
===The Ivy dream===<br />
In [[Episode 19]], Chris recounted a vision where two-thirds of the Holy Trinity told him, in the most explicit possible terms, that [[Ivy]] was destined to be his one true love, that his enemies would be defeated, and that his [[biological clock]] would soon be conveniently reset. None of these prophecies came true. Chris may still believe that Ivy was absolutely not a troll, but this did not stop him from crafting a gruesome death for her in the pages of his comic.<br />
<br />
===The Watery Maze Dream===<br />
[[File:ThirdLabyrinth.gif|thumb|right|Animated for your non-pleasure. (Note: The original animation showed Chris's crude portraits of himself and the mystery woman as nude, but he added clothes so he could re-upload it to the G-rated Flipnote website).]]<br />
Another one of Chris's wet dreams, in the literal sense this time, involves a vision of encountering his promised sweetheart in a "watery maze." Chris mentioned this recurring dream in his [[Quizzes#Christian Weston Chandler Quiz|quiz about himself]], although he didn't offer very many additional details.<br />
<br />
[[Liquid Chris]] took advantage of this bit of information to mock his rival in one of his [[For Chris|videos]], declaring that he and his girlfriend [[Kacey]] "are going to swim through a watery maze and make passionate love to each other and [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|it's going to be awesome]]."<br />
<br />
Chris eventually immortalized this dream in a [[An Ol' Classic Dream|terrifying animation]], showing us a little more of what it's about. The details were unsurprising: in a maze full of water, Chris meets an unspecified woman and has sex with her. The end. <br />
<br />
Chris was especially eager to keep this animation on [[Flipnote Hatena]], having uploaded it a grand total of ''six times'', despite its assorted violations of the website's policies. Though the site's moderators deleted it a number of times, he doggedly kept re-uploading it. Judging by the monologue after the dream ("If only I knew who you are in reality...") Chris believes that the [[Lovely Weather|"LOVELY WOMAN"]] is a real boyfriend-free girl somewhere, perhaps one who suffers from a recurring nightmare in which she is raped by an obese manchild. By putting his sex fantasy where everyone could see it, Chris may have been attempting to contact the non-existent woman.<br />
<br />
===Sticky Dream===<br />
Due to the combined threat of his somewhat [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]] and his peculiar mindset on sex, Chris is noticeably confused about basic sexual terminology; for example, in [[Ivy Q&A#Threats|Ivy Q&A]] it's mentioned that Chris told Ivy that he had a "sticky dream" about her. When Ivy asked if he meant a wet dream, he replied, "No, that's when you pee yourself, silly!"<br />
<br />
==Minor dreams==<br />
===The Sonic on Game Boy dream===<br />
In the [[Song of Christian]], Chris claims to have experienced a dream involving a [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] game for Nintendo's Game Boy handheld. According to the [[Sonichu Chronicles]], it took place in June 1997. This, he says, is what inspired the "Sonic Dumps Sega, Joins Nintendo" cover story on his [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]], as well as the many half-assed knockoff Sonic game concepts inside of it. He also wrote a letter to the real ''Nintendo Power'' describing the dream.<br />
<br />
This is one dream of Chris's that actually came true, after a fashion. While Nintendo never made a Sonic game for the original Game Boy, ''[[Wikipedia:Sonic Advance|Sonic Advance]]'' hit the Game Boy Advance at the tail end of 2001. It was one of the very first Sonic games for a non-Sega hardware platform, seeing release around the same time as ''Sonic Adventure 2: Battle'' for Nintendo's GameCube. In typical Chris fashion, he announced that he "pretty much foretold that outcome" in a [[The Sonichu Chronicles|PowerPoint presentation]].<br />
<br />
===The Pamela dream===<br />
During his chats with (someone he believed to be) [[Vanessa Hudgens]], Chris cited a dream that taught him a useful moral lesson. Supposedly, during the long months of the [[Megan Saga]], Chris had a dream where he "had to choose" between his True and Honest love for [[Megan Schroeder]] and his temporary lust for [[Chris and television|TV star Pamela Anderson]]. "I stuck by my [[Chris and religion|morals]] and went for Megan," Chris explained. "And because the same is being applied between you and [[Ivy]], I am going to remain strong and true and stay with Ivy."<br />
<br />
Given that he never got any from Megan, of course, in retrospect the sensible choice would have been to go for Pamela, a la Borat. Here's to the path not taken.<br />
<br />
===The Patti-chan dream===<br />
Some time after the death of his beloved dog [[Patti-Chan|Patti]], Chris had a dream (or multiple dreams) reassuring him that Patti was all right and living comfortably in the presence of God. Chris discussed this in his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|Plea to Clyde Cash]] from [[January 2009]], hoping that Clyde would follow his example, "get over" the death of [[Ryan Cash]], and stop cruelly tormenting him. For some reason, Clyde chose to ignore Chris's advice.<br />
<br />
===The acid factory dream===<br />
<br />
In [[Mailbag 39]], responding to a question that attempted to reason with him about his hatred of [[Asperchu]], Chris dove off along a tangent and described a particularly picturesque nightmare that mixes his hatred of [[tobacky]], his now non-hatred of [[alcohol]], and his [[Chris and race|racism]].<br />
<br />
{{quote|I was in a factory and I watched PEOPLE lying on a conveyor belt with their mouths full of cigarettes, [[Chris and Race#Jews|going through BURNING OVENS]], coming out singed (not ON FIRE), then dunked into a huge tank of Alcohol that DISSOLVED THEM to DUST like ACID would do, and their remains would come out of the factory's smokestacks in puffs of smoke and ashes. And another detail, the Front of the factory is SKULL-SHAPED.|Your guess is as good as ours.}}<br />
[[Image:Wily's Castle.jpg|thumb|A skull-shaped building, where have we seen that?]]<br />
<br />
Chris has a habit of bringing up traumatic experiences from his past on the least provocation, usually as a way of fishing for sympathy. For instance, during the [[Father Call]], he went on the defensive by suddenly changing the subject to the incident where he was allegedly abused at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|elementary school]].<br />
<br />
===Dreaming of death===<br />
Chris has apparently dreamed on multiple occasions of the instant that precedes death. In his [[ChrisChanSonichu_and_WikiSysop_correspondence#Size_does_not_matter._.28CCS.29|conversations]] with the Sysop of [[CWCipedia]], while complaining about various objectionable advertisements on "his" site, he delivered the following bizarre non sequitur:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Seeing the BIG Ad in the One Spot is as terrifying as the Flash Of Light at the Instant Millisecond of DEATH, or even, technologically, the [[Wikipedia:Blue Screen Of Death|Blue Screen Of Death]]. And Believe Me, IN DREAMS, and even IN MOMENTS within my mind while AWAKE, I HAVE SEEN AND FELT That Death Light. Not only is it the Most Horrifying Thing Ever, but I am [[Chris and English|LOOOONG NOT READY FOR IT YET]].|This statement offered without comment.}}<br />
<br />
Exactly why Chris chose to draw a connection between the moment of a human being's physical death and the moment of a Windows PC crashing is uncertain. This might be because the error alert that comes up after a critical system error in PCs is colloquially known as the "Blue Screen of Death" (BSoD), which literal-minded Chris would associate with a real near death experience.<br />
<br />
===High school dreams===<br />
During his [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|date with Emily]], Chris mentioned recurring dreams about his days at [[Manchester High School]]. Given that his high school years were the last time Chris had anything like real friends or a fulfilling social life, it's no surprise that he often revisits them in his dreams. He describes the dreams in a very wistful, nostalgic tone: "I get to see all my- all my old s- c- all my old friends... there."<br />
<br />
Chris also added that Megan Schroeder sometimes appears in his dreams of high school, even though he didn't meet her until well after he graduated and returned home to [[Ruckersville]]. Clearly, his unconscious mind is cobbling together an amalgam of all his fondest memories.<br />
<br />
===Prince dream===<br />
According to an August 29, 2010 e-mail to [[Jackie]], Chris dreamt that he was in a Prince and Pauper situation, in which he switched lives with a Prince. He called it "confusing and [[stress]]-filled" and said he was surrounded with people who had no understanding of him, and was upset with the Prince's [[babysitter]] for calling Yoshi a "[[homosexual]] icon".<ref>http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_11</ref><br />
<br />
==Typifying Chris's dreams==<br />
Just like those of real people, Chris's dreams can be split into some distinct categories which can tell us more about his motivations, his fears, and his state of mind at the time he dreamt them. It should be noted that the dreams Chris has seen fit to discuss are no doubt the ones which have affected him emotionally and which he thus considers worthy of discussion. It is highly likely that on most nights he simply dreams his Aspie dreams about day-to-day events, just like we all do. Considering what Chris's life is like, these are probably not worth consideration by anyone.<br />
<br />
===Wish-fulfillment Dreams===<br />
Freud stated that all dreams were a kind of wish-fulfillment. While this has been discussed ad nauseam and expanded upon by many psychologists in the years since, this represents a good jumping-off point for studying some of Chris's dreams. As one example — Chris's dog died, and he wanted to know that she was happy, so he dreamt that she was in heaven. This is simple enough (though it does raise questions about Chris's ability to work through his grief). Also part of this are dreams when he is back at high school, in dumbass classes where he wasn't affected by the cruelties of real life, surrounded by [[gal-pals]] and still svelte enough to fit into his Ash Ketchum costume. The anachronistic appearance of Megan in these dreams serves to confirm that they represent mental wish-fulfillment on his part. Chris wants to go back to high school, and his mind allows him to do so.<br />
<br />
===Aspirational dreams===<br />
Chris's dream about Crystal, and those he attributes to the influence of God, represent a far less common and somewhat more problematic type of dream — ones which seem to create aspirations in the dreamer. These dreams are extremely rare, in many cases happening only a handful of times in an entire lifetime (according to Jung). Chris's dream about Crystal, considering it happened at such an early age, likely coincided with a major period of psychological growth in his life (what little we know about Chris's life at this time may support this notion), which would have inflated an otherwise small thought in his mind to a highly emotional aspiration. To have remembered this dream for so long suggests a feeling of bliss or enormous happiness at the time of dreaming, which he now associates with the content of the dream. Crystal therefore represents less an actual wish for a daughter (Chris doesn't know shit about raising children, and is too lazy and self-centered to do it well) and more a desire to return to the state of happiness he felt in his sleep, likely at a moment of extreme personal catharsis within his waking life.<br />
<br />
===Nightmares===<br />
Given Chris's [[Parody|total lack of imagination]], his nightmares seem shockingly vivid. The particulars of what they represent are a job for a psychologist of a level above that of a [[Rocky Shoemaker|church counselor]] (although the acid factory dream is simple enough to understand - Chris hates [[alcohol]] and [[tobacky]]), but their apparent muffled severity offers us some hope that within the stagnating mass of lard and stupidity that is Chris, there is a voice of reason struggling to escape like a drowning man screaming madly for the surface. If Chris ever discovers the core of the turmoil indicated by his nightmares and what they represent, it would very likely destroy his perspective on the world and he may finally continue on the path towards psychological maturity.<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and psychology]]<br />
*[[Chris and religion]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
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[[Category:Chris]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Dreams&diff=166029Dreams2013-06-11T19:57:48Z<p>CaseHa: /* Grim Reaper dream */</p>
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{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[File:449-CWCDreamCatcher.JPG|thumb|Authentic [[Cherokian]] dream catcher.]]<br />
[[Image:CWCletter.jpg|thumb|right|The letter to Blanca, a classic example of Chris's prophetic powers in action.]]<br />
Nowadays, it is widely accepted that '''dreams''' can provide valuable insight into the mind of the dreamer. While they represent, at best, a warped reflection of what goes on in the unconscious mind, dreams are nevertheless made up of more than just random, meaningless images.<br />
<br />
[[Chris]] adheres to a simpler, primitive belief in the significance of dreams. It's part and parcel of his religious mysticism — he believes many of his dreams are messages from God, as if he were a modern day [[wikipedia:Book Of Daniel|Daniel.]] Dreams, in Chris's mind, can provide accurate portents of the future, and much of his strange behavior may be connected to his attempts to make these dreams into reality.<br />
<br />
==Significant dreams==<br />
<br />
Chris has often claimed that his dreams represent communications from the divine. On [[IRC (02 January 2009)|IRC]], when asked about his purpose in life, he explained it like so: "To eventually be married to my Sweetheart, then give birth and raise my daughter, as God has pointed it out for me in my dream." Likewise, when [[PandaHalo]] asked him why he wanted a daughter so badly, he said, "it was fortold to me in multiple dreams."<br />
<br />
During the [[Father Call]], when Matthew Devoria pointed out that his belief in prophetic dreams was both highly unlikely and potentially blasphemous, Chris was willing to back off from some of the weirder implications of his philosophy. "I am not saying that I am a prophet," he admitted. However, he continued to cling to the belief that his dreams represent the future. "I'm not saying that it is the definite future," he explained, "but that it is a POSSIBLE future."<br />
<br />
It could be that Chris believes that [[Chris and religion|God]] gives him these "visions of the future" in order to comfort him with the knowledge that he will, in fact, triumph in the face of adversity and [[autism]]. Chris himself has, on several occasions, shown that he fears suspense and uncertainty and it wouldn't be a great leap of reason to assume that he thinks [[Chris and his Ego|God is personally tossing him spoilers for his own life]] in much the same way as Chris slathers them onto [[Sonichu]].<br />
<br />
When a letter in [[Mailbag 55]] called Chris out on his insane belief, his response was to ask "What is YOUR Dream Career?", suggesting that he has misinterpreted various dream-related expressions such as "the woman of my dreams" or "my dream job". While the expressions actually mean "It would be dreamlike to have a job like that or a wife like her", Chris may take it to mean "God literally showed this job/woman to me in a dream".<br />
<br />
Chris has discussed several of his more important or influential dreams in many of his comics, chats, and videos. There may be a great many more that he's never felt like sharing with the outside world, so this section is by no means comprehensive, but it should at least provide a basic overview of the sort of prophecies Chris believes that he receives.<br />
<br />
===The Crystal dream===<br />
{{quote|I have my dreams that God gave to me, and I have to see my Crystal Weston Chandler be Born.|Chris, [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]]}}<br />
<br />
By far the most significant of Chris's dreams is this one, where he saw himself married to an unspecified woman and raising a daughter named [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]]. This represents the genesis of his [[Love Quest]], or at any rate his favorite excuse. When he's not willing to admit that what he really wants is [[china|pussy]], Chris claims that his search for a sweetheart is intended to fulfill God's will and produce his prophesied daughter.<br />
<br />
{{quote|You see, I have a dream, I have my dream, and that dream is to give birth, to have, to share a daughter with my wife-to-be, and her name would be Crystal.|Chris, during the [[Father Call]].}}<br />
<br />
Chris, always one to share too much personal information during conversations with strangers, sometimes brings up the Crystal dream while introducing himself to people. In one of his [[Facebook_messages#Christy_Backe|Facebook conversations]], he sent a new contact the following question: "Do you know any 18-25-year old single women who might like me? I would appreciate any help I can get in finding the one who would be my Sweetheart, and help me realize my dream of me fathering a pretty daughter named Crystal Weston Chandler."<br />
<br />
For some time, the many trolls following Chris operated according to the belief that the dream took place when he was around 21 years old, right around the formal beginning of the Love Quest. During the [[Father Call]], however, Chris very clearly stated that he had the dream when he was in elementary school, between seven and nine years of age. In that description of the dream, he also noted that he "had, like, an office job" in his future life, an embellishment that smacks of Chris attempting to impress [[Kacey]]'s father.<br />
<br />
This statement, however, predates the Father Call. In an [[Katie_Bay_E-mails_3#7.2F28.2F09|email sent to Katie Bay]] near the end of July 2009, Chris used this dream as an excuse to not get a job. Specifically, he expressed annoyance that he does not know what kind of job he has in the dream, only that he is working in an office building, his daughter is present, and shortly after the dream begins the building starts to collapse and he needs to run away with Crystal.<br />
<br />
Chris's dreams about his future daughter are at least partially responsible for his refusal to date black women. In [[Mailbag 35]], he explained, "I never saw a black woman being my wife in any of my dreams of me and my white baby daughter."<br />
<br />
===Grim Reaper dream===<br />
In a dream some time before 2005, Chris met the [[Wikipedia:Death (personification)|Grim Reaper]]: <br />
{{Quote|I understand [[Bob Chandler|my dad]] does not have long to live, but I have to ask while you're here, when will you be taking my father? He informed me that he would not claim his soul until the year 2015.|From [[Jackie E-mails 31]]}}<br />
Chris found this comforting, but was enraged with the Grim Reaper (the ultimate [[troll]]) when he took Bob's soul in [[2011]].<br />
{{Quote| Damn you, Reaper, this is Two Thousand Eleven! I Was Promised that we'd be blessed with father's presence for Four More Years! [[Chris and his ego|I Was Promised!!!]]|Chris telling Death what he is entitled to}}<br />
<br />
===The Blanca dream===<br />
During the late summer and early fall of [[2008]], Chris wildly ping-ponged back and forth between a number of potential [[trolls|sweethearts]], including [[PandaHalo]], [[Sarah Jackson]], and [[Blanca Weiss]]. On September 29, however, he finally settled on Blanca, having supposedly experienced a dream where he met her in the lobby of a [[Charlottesville]] hotel.<br />
<br />
Chris describes the dream in some detail in his [[Blanca_Emails,_September_2008#Chris_dreams_of_Blanca|e-mails to Blanca]], as well as the [[Chris's Letter to Blanca|letter]] he sent to her along with his medallions. <br />
<br />
{{quote|I FINALLY HAD my Dream that I have been waiting for for soo long; the dream revealing the name of my Sweetheart-to-be. the scenario was simply, after talking to her over the internet, I went to the local Hotel to meet her, and her name came up Often, and was Burned into my Memory and my Heart...SHE is YOU. :) YOU, Blanca Weiss, ARE MY SWEETHEART-TO-BE!|Chris, falling for it on a number of levels.}}<br />
<br />
He also mentioned the dream on his [[The OFFICIAL Sonichu & Rosechu Blog|blog]], claiming that "[[God and Jesus]] have revealed to me the name of my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be." Three weeks later, the object of Chris's divinely-inspired love dumped him (after dumping his beloved [[medallions]] in [[pickle]] brine).<br />
<br />
===The PandaHalo dream===<br />
Although breaking up with Blanca temporarily sent Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 21st, 2008|crashing into slumber]], he recovered from the trauma quickly enough with the aid of his dear friend PandaHalo. By mid-November, he was having wet dreams about her and sharing the details in their communications, which Panda promptly passed on to her fellow trolls on [[IRC (26 November 2008)|IRC]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|During my most recent dream, You were in it. You were alone in your apartment; I had just run in to see you. We talked for a bit, but then you and I, we made out, then got naked and lost our virgin ways to each other. It got soo goodly hot and wild, that I came in my sleep over you.|Chris, traumatizing a chatroom full of trolls.}}<br />
<br />
If this particular dream also happened to be a prophecy, GodJesus must have gotten his wires crossed. Chris never met Panda in person, and had more or less gotten over her long before she allegedly died early in 2009.<br />
<br />
===The Ivy dream===<br />
In [[Episode 19]], Chris recounted a vision where two-thirds of the Holy Trinity told him, in the most explicit possible terms, that [[Ivy]] was destined to be his one true love, that his enemies would be defeated, and that his [[biological clock]] would soon be conveniently reset. None of these prophecies came true. Chris may still believe that Ivy was absolutely not a troll, but this did not stop him from crafting a gruesome death for her in the pages of his comic.<br />
<br />
===The Watery Maze Dream===<br />
[[File:ThirdLabyrinth.gif|thumb|right|Animated for your non-pleasure. (Note: The original animation showed Chris's crude portraits of himself and the mystery woman as nude, but he added clothes so he could re-upload it to the G-rated Flipnote website).]]<br />
Another one of Chris's wet dreams, in the literal sense this time, involves a vision of encountering his promised sweetheart in a "watery maze." Chris mentioned this recurring dream in his [[Quizzes#Christian Weston Chandler Quiz|quiz about himself]], although he didn't offer very many additional details.<br />
<br />
[[Liquid Chris]] took advantage of this bit of information to mock his rival in one of his [[For Chris|videos]], declaring that he and his girlfriend [[Kacey]] "are going to swim through a watery maze and make passionate love to each other and [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|it's going to be awesome]]."<br />
<br />
Chris eventually immortalized this dream in a [[An Ol' Classic Dream|terrifying animation]], showing us a little more of what it's about. The details were unsurprising: in a maze full of water, Chris meets an unspecified woman and has sex with her. The end. <br />
<br />
Chris was especially eager to keep this animation on [[Flipnote Hatena]], having uploaded it a grand total of ''six times'', despite its assorted violations of the website's policies. Though the site's moderators deleted it a number of times, he doggedly kept re-uploading it. Judging by the monologue after the dream ("If only I knew who you are in reality...") Chris believes that the [[Lovely Weather|"LOVELY WOMAN"]] is a real boyfriend-free girl somewhere, perhaps one who suffers from a recurring nightmare in which she is raped by an obese manchild. By putting his sex fantasy where everyone could see it, Chris may have been attempting to contact the non-existent woman.<br />
<br />
===Sticky Dream===<br />
Due to the combined threat of his somewhat [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]] and his peculiar mindset on sex, Chris is noticeably confused about basic sexual terminology; for example, in [[Ivy Q&A#Threats|Ivy Q&A]] it's mentioned that Chris told Ivy that he had a "sticky dream" about her. When Ivy asked if he meant a wet dream, he replied, "No, that's when you pee yourself, silly!"<br />
<br />
==Minor dreams==<br />
===The Sonic on Game Boy dream===<br />
In the [[Song of Christian]], Chris claims to have experienced a dream involving a [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] game for Nintendo's Game Boy handheld. According to the [[Sonichu Chronicles]], it took place in June 1997. This, he says, is what inspired the "Sonic Dumps Sega, Joins Nintendo" cover story on his [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]], as well as the many half-assed knockoff Sonic game concepts inside of it. He also wrote a letter to the real ''Nintendo Power'' describing the dream.<br />
<br />
This is one dream of Chris's that actually came true, after a fashion. While Nintendo never made a Sonic game for the original Game Boy, ''[[Wikipedia:Sonic Advance|Sonic Advance]]'' hit the Game Boy Advance at the tail end of 2001. It was one of the very first Sonic games for a non-Sega hardware platform, seeing release around the same time as ''Sonic Adventure 2: Battle'' for Nintendo's GameCube. In typical Chris fashion, he announced that he "pretty much foretold that outcome" in a [[The Sonichu Chronicles|PowerPoint presentation]].<br />
<br />
===The Pamela dream===<br />
During his chats with (someone he believed to be) [[Vanessa Hudgens]], Chris cited a dream that taught him a useful moral lesson. Supposedly, during the long months of the [[Megan Saga]], Chris had a dream where he "had to choose" between his True and Honest love for [[Megan Schroeder]] and his temporary lust for [[Chris and television|TV star Pamela Anderson]]. "I stuck by my [[Chris and religion|morals]] and went for Megan," Chris explained. "And because the same is being applied between you and [[Ivy]], I am going to remain strong and true and stay with Ivy."<br />
<br />
Given that he never got any from Megan, of course, in retrospect the sensible choice would have been to go for Pamela, a la Borat. Here's to the path not taken.<br />
<br />
===The Patti-chan dream===<br />
Some time after the death of his beloved dog [[Patti-Chan|Patti]], Chris had a dream (or multiple dreams) reassuring him that Patti was all right and living comfortably in the presence of God. Chris discussed this in his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|Plea to Clyde Cash]] from [[January 2009]], hoping that Clyde would follow his example, "get over" the death of [[Ryan Cash]], and stop cruelly tormenting him. For some reason, Clyde chose to ignore Chris's advice.<br />
<br />
===The acid factory dream===<br />
<br />
In [[Mailbag 39]], responding to a question that attempted to reason with him about his hatred of [[Asperchu]], Chris dove off along a tangent and described a particularly picturesque nightmare that mixes his hatred of [[tobacky]], his now non-hatred of [[alcohol]], and his [[Chris and race|racism]].<br />
<br />
{{quote|I was in a factory and I watched PEOPLE lying on a conveyor belt with their mouths full of cigarettes, [[Chris and Race#Jews|going through BURNING OVENS]], coming out singed (not ON FIRE), then dunked into a huge tank of Alcohol that DISSOLVED THEM to DUST like ACID would do, and their remains would come out of the factory's smokestacks in puffs of smoke and ashes. And another detail, the Front of the factory is SKULL-SHAPED.|Your guess is as good as ours.}}<br />
[[Image:Wily's Castle.jpg|thumb|A skull-shaped building, where have we seen that?]]<br />
<br />
Chris has a habit of bringing up traumatic experiences from his past on the least provocation, usually as a way of fishing for sympathy. For instance, during the [[Father Call]], he went on the defensive by suddenly changing the subject to the incident where he was allegedly abused at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|elementary school]].<br />
<br />
===Dreaming of death===<br />
Chris has apparently dreamed on multiple occasions of the instant that precedes death. In his [[ChrisChanSonichu_and_WikiSysop_correspondence#Size_does_not_matter._.28CCS.29|conversations]] with the Sysop of [[CWCipedia]], while complaining about various objectionable advertisements on "his" site, he delivered the following bizarre non sequitur:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Seeing the BIG Ad in the One Spot is as terrifying as the Flash Of Light at the Instant Millisecond of DEATH, or even, technologically, the [[Wikipedia:Blue Screen Of Death|Blue Screen Of Death]]. And Believe Me, IN DREAMS, and even IN MOMENTS within my mind while AWAKE, I HAVE SEEN AND FELT That Death Light. Not only is it the Most Horrifying Thing Ever, but I am [[Chris and English|LOOOONG NOT READY FOR IT YET]].|This statement offered without comment.}}<br />
<br />
Exactly why Chris chose to draw a connection between the moment of a human being's physical death and the moment of a Windows PC crashing is uncertain. This might be because the error alert that comes up after a critical system error in PCs is colloquially known as the "Blue Screen of Death" (BSoD), which literal-minded Chris would associate with a real near death experience.<br />
<br />
===High school dreams===<br />
During his [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|date with Emily]], Chris mentioned recurring dreams about his days at [[Manchester High School]]. Given that his high school years were the last time Chris had anything like real friends or a fulfilling social life, it's no surprise that he often revisits them in his dreams. He describes the dreams in a very wistful, nostalgic tone: "I get to see all my- all my old s- c- all my old friends... there."<br />
<br />
Chris also added that Megan Schroeder sometimes appears in his dreams of high school, even though he didn't meet her until well after he graduated and returned home to [[Ruckersville]]. Clearly, his unconscious mind is cobbling together an amalgam of all his fondest memories.<br />
<br />
===Prince dream===<br />
According to an August 29, 2010 e-mail to [[Jackie]], Chris dreamt that he was in a Prince and Pauper situation, in which he switched lives with a Prince. He called it "confusing and [[stress]]-filled" and said he was surrounded with people who had no understanding of him, and was upset with the Prince's [[babysitter]] for calling Yoshi a "[[homosexual]] icon".<ref>http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_11</ref><br />
<br />
==Typifying Chris's dreams==<br />
Just like those of real people, Chris's dreams can be split into some distinct categories which can tell us more about his motivations, his fears, and his state of mind at the time he dreamt them. It should be noted that the dreams Chris has seen fit to discuss are no doubt the ones which have affected him emotionally and which he thus considers worthy of discussion. It is highly likely that on most nights he simply dreams his Aspie dreams about day-to-day events, just like we all do. Considering what Chris's life is like, these are probably not worth consideration by anyone.<br />
<br />
===Wish-fulfillment Dreams===<br />
Freud stated that all dreams were a kind of wish-fulfillment. While this has been discussed ad nauseam and expanded upon by many psychologists in the years since, this represents a good jumping-off point for studying some of Chris's dreams. As one example — Chris's dog died, and he wanted to know that she was happy, so he dreamt that she was in heaven. This is simple enough (though it does raise questions about Chris's ability to work through his grief). Also part of this are dreams when he is back at high school, in dumbass classes where he wasn't affected by the cruelties of real life, surrounded by [[gal-pals]] and still svelte enough to fit into his Ash Ketchum costume. The anachronistic appearance of Megan in these dreams serves to confirm that they represent mental wish-fulfillment on his part. Chris wants to go back to high school, and his mind allows him to do so.<br />
<br />
===Aspirational dreams===<br />
Chris's dream about Crystal, and those he attributes to the influence of God, represent a far less common and somewhat more problematic type of dream — ones which seem to create aspirations in the dreamer. These dreams are extremely rare, in many cases happening only a handful of times in an entire lifetime (according to Jung). Chris's dream about Crystal, considering it happened at such an early age, likely coincided with a major period of psychological growth in his life (what little we know about Chris's life at this time may support this notion), which would have inflated an otherwise small thought in his mind to a highly emotional aspiration. To have remembered this dream for so long suggests a feeling of bliss or enormous happiness at the time of dreaming, which he now associates with the content of the dream. Crystal therefore represents less an actual wish for a daughter (Chris doesn't know shit about raising children, and is too lazy and self-centered to do it well) and more a desire to return to the state of happiness he felt in his sleep, likely at a moment of extreme personal catharsis within his waking life.<br />
<br />
===Nightmares===<br />
Given Chris's [[Parody|total lack of imagination]], his nightmares seem shockingly vivid. The particulars of what they represent are a job for a psychologist of a level above that of a [[Rocky Shoemaker|church counselor]] (although the acid factory dream is simple enough to understand - Chris hates [[alcohol]] and [[tobacky]]), but their apparent muffled severity offers us some hope that within the stagnating mass of lard and stupidity that is Chris, there is a voice of reason struggling to escape like a drowning man screaming madly for the surface. If Chris ever discovers the core of the turmoil indicated by his nightmares and what they represent, it would very likely destroy his perspective on the world and he may finally continue on the path towards psychological maturity.<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and psychology]]<br />
*[[Chris and religion]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Hair&diff=165987Hair2013-06-07T20:53:51Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Baldtotheextreme.jpg|thumb|right|"I am not balding; I had a haircut in that video that started that Damn Rumor."]]<br />
<br />
Soaked with grease and rapidly falling off, [[Chris]]'s '''hair''' is one of the many indicators of his unhealthy lifestyle.<br />
<br />
Already in atrocious physical condition for someone his age, Chris's baldness has made him look creepier and even more like a [[pedofork|pedophile]] and/or fat, old lesbian. His refusal to regularly bathe, which leaves his hair greasy and unmanageable, and his occasional attempts at crafting a combover haven't helped matters. <br />
<br />
A popular theory amongst [[trolls]] proposes that the baldness is a physical indicator of the [[stress]] Chris claims they put him through. More likely, though, Chris just drew an unlucky ticket in the genetic lottery. Photos of his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] show that Cole lost his hair up front relatively early in life as well, and [[Bob]] was bald as well. However, inactivity, poor diet, illness, and stress are well known to accelerate the balding process. In addition, there is a strong correlation between the man's age with the eventual extent of the baldness - when male-pattern baldness starts as early as it does with Chris, you will tend to end up with much less hair in the end; which does not bode well for Chris's [[tomgirl]] dreams.<br />
<br />
Naturally, Chris being Chris, he thinks his hair looks just fine. During the first [[Kacey Phone Call]], he enthusiastically (while pretending to be [[Liquid]]) [[Chris and his Ego|praised said haircut]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his [[Barbara Chandler|mom]] probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh... I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.}}<br />
<br />
If you were at all surprised to learn that Chris doesn't bother to go to a decent barber, but instead lets his mom cut his hair...well, you're new here, aren't you?[[Image:FutureCWC.jpg|thumb|What Chris will look like by next December.]]<br />
<br />
When confronted in the [[Mailbag]] ([[Mailbag 17#Chris's receding hairline disagrees|17]], [[Mailbag 25#Balding issues|25]] and [[Mailbag 28#He's also going bald|28]]) about his obviously thinning hair, Chris was, as per usual, completely in denial.<br />
<br />
In videos taken of Chris at a [[Fridays After Five]] event, a bald spot is seen starting to appear on the back of his head.<br />
<br />
[[File:TG9.jpg|thumb|Chris with longer hair]]<br />
[[File:Chris Long Hair.jpg|thumb|Chris with shoulder length hair.]]<br />
[[File:Hemanchristian.jpg|thumb|Tomgirl of Eternia]]<br />
<br />
Since becoming a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]], Chris has let his hair grow out and has seemingly attempted to color it blonde. This was likely not done by a professional stylist, because his new hair color is a hideous urine yellow. In some photos, such as the one he took at Salvation Army, the darker roots are visible through his extremely thin hair. It also appears that Chris's hair is naturally curly or wavy when he lets it grow long. Another possibility is that he curls his hair with a curling iron, although Chris is far too lax in his personal grooming for that type of styling regimen. An [[October 2012]] [[Facebook]] profile picture revealed Chris has grown his hair shoulder length.<br />
<br />
In [[May 2011]], Barb forced Chris to have his hair cut. This resulted in Chris calling Barb a bitch. Chris saved the hair and wore it around his neck in hopes it would grow back faster. <ref>http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_26</ref><br />
<br />
==Hair mail==<br />
Cassie, co-founder of [[Sonichu Girls]], asked Chris for locks of his hairs so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as a souvenir.<br />
<br />
Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Troll|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair, placing it into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big [[China|C]] himself.<br />
<br />
Due to the Mexican postal service ([[Chris and race#Hispanics|insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here]]), it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.<br />
<br />
Cassie described the hair as being "greasy" and having an odd odor. Evidently, Chris's hair is so filthy, the Mexican postal service, which regularly "unknowingly" ships countless pounds of cocaine, marijuana, and other illegal narcotics per year, had trouble dealing with this biohazard. Fortunately, this violation of [http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode06/usc_sec_06_00001203----000-.html United States Code: Title 16, Chapter 4, SubChapter IV, § 1203 (a)(4-7)] did not cause any national or international incidents.<br />
<br />
While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's version of Spanish, with each side having a [[Sonichu]] drawing, where the [[Spanish]] side has [[Chris and race|Sonichu in a sombrero]].<br />
<br />
==Gallery of hair==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.<br />
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire collection of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])<br />
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it was his.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and health]]<br />
*[[HairDifference]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Hair&diff=165986Hair2013-06-07T20:51:42Z<p>CaseHa: /* References */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Baldtotheextreme.jpg|thumb|right|"I am not balding; I had a haircut in that video that started that Damn Rumor."]]<br />
<br />
Soaked with grease and rapidly falling off, [[Chris]]'s '''hair''' is one of the many indicators of his unhealthy lifestyle.<br />
<br />
Already in atrocious physical condition for someone his age, Chris's baldness has made him look creepier and even more like a [[pedofork|pedophile]] and/or fat, old lesbian. His refusal to regularly bathe, which leaves his hair greasy and unmanageable, and his occasional attempts at crafting a combover haven't helped matters. <br />
<br />
A popular theory amongst [[trolls]] proposes that the baldness is a physical indicator of the [[stress]] Chris claims they put him through. More likely, though, Chris just drew an unlucky ticket in the genetic lottery. Photos of his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] show that Cole lost his hair up front relatively early in life as well, and [[Bob]] was bald as well. However, inactivity, poor diet, illness, and stress are well known to accelerate the balding process. In addition, there is a strong correlation between the man's age with the eventual extent of the baldness - when male-pattern baldness starts as early as it does with Chris, you will tend to end up with much less hair in the end; which does not bode well for Chris's [[tomgirl]] dreams.<br />
<br />
Naturally, Chris being Chris, he thinks his hair looks just fine. During the first [[Kacey Phone Call]], he enthusiastically (while pretending to be [[Liquid]]) [[Chris and his Ego|praised said haircut]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his [[Barbara Chandler|mom]] probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh... I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.}}<br />
<br />
If you were at all surprised to learn that Chris doesn't bother to go to a decent barber, but instead lets his mom cut his hair...well, you're new here, aren't you?[[Image:FutureCWC.jpg|thumb|What Chris will look like by next December.]]<br />
<br />
When confronted in the [[Mailbag]] ([[Mailbag 17#Chris's receding hairline disagrees|17]], [[Mailbag 25#Balding issues|25]] and [[Mailbag 28#He's also going bald|28]]) about his obviously thinning hair, Chris was, as per usual, completely in denial.<br />
<br />
In videos taken of Chris at a [[Fridays After Five]] event, a bald spot is seen starting to appear on the back of his head.<br />
<br />
[[File:TG9.jpg|thumb|Chris with longer hair]]<br />
[[File:Chris Long Hair.jpg|thumb|Chris with shoulder length hair.]]<br />
[[File:Hemanchristian.jpg|thumb|Tomgirl of Eternia]]<br />
<br />
Since becoming a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]], Chris has let his hair grow out and has seemingly attempted to color it blonde. This was likely not done by a professional stylist, because his new hair color is a hideous urine yellow. In some photos, such as the one he took at Salvation Army, the darker roots are visible through his extremely thin hair. It also appears that Chris's hair is naturally curly or wavy when he lets it grow long. Another possibility is that he curls his hair with a curling iron, although Chris is far too lax in his personal grooming for that type of styling regimen. An [[October 2012]] [[Facebook]] profile picture revealed Chris has grown his hair shoulder length.<br />
<br />
Recently, Barb forced Chris to have his hair cut. This resulted in Chris calling Barb a bitch. Chris saved the hair and wore it around his neck in hopes it would grow back faster. <ref>http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_26</ref><br />
<br />
==Hair mail==<br />
Cassie, co-founder of [[Sonichu Girls]], asked Chris for locks of his hairs so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as a souvenir.<br />
<br />
Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Troll|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair, placing it into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big [[China|C]] himself.<br />
<br />
Due to the Mexican postal service ([[Chris and race#Hispanics|insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here]]), it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.<br />
<br />
Cassie described the hair as being "greasy" and having an odd odor. Evidently, Chris's hair is so filthy, the Mexican postal service, which regularly "unknowingly" ships countless pounds of cocaine, marijuana, and other illegal narcotics per year, had trouble dealing with this biohazard. Fortunately, this violation of [http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode06/usc_sec_06_00001203----000-.html United States Code: Title 16, Chapter 4, SubChapter IV, § 1203 (a)(4-7)] did not cause any national or international incidents.<br />
<br />
While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's version of Spanish, with each side having a [[Sonichu]] drawing, where the [[Spanish]] side has [[Chris and race|Sonichu in a sombrero]].<br />
<br />
==Gallery of hair==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.<br />
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire collection of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])<br />
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it was his.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and health]]<br />
*[[HairDifference]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Hair&diff=165985Hair2013-06-07T20:50:56Z<p>CaseHa: /* See also */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Baldtotheextreme.jpg|thumb|right|"I am not balding; I had a haircut in that video that started that Damn Rumor."]]<br />
<br />
Soaked with grease and rapidly falling off, [[Chris]]'s '''hair''' is one of the many indicators of his unhealthy lifestyle.<br />
<br />
Already in atrocious physical condition for someone his age, Chris's baldness has made him look creepier and even more like a [[pedofork|pedophile]] and/or fat, old lesbian. His refusal to regularly bathe, which leaves his hair greasy and unmanageable, and his occasional attempts at crafting a combover haven't helped matters. <br />
<br />
A popular theory amongst [[trolls]] proposes that the baldness is a physical indicator of the [[stress]] Chris claims they put him through. More likely, though, Chris just drew an unlucky ticket in the genetic lottery. Photos of his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] show that Cole lost his hair up front relatively early in life as well, and [[Bob]] was bald as well. However, inactivity, poor diet, illness, and stress are well known to accelerate the balding process. In addition, there is a strong correlation between the man's age with the eventual extent of the baldness - when male-pattern baldness starts as early as it does with Chris, you will tend to end up with much less hair in the end; which does not bode well for Chris's [[tomgirl]] dreams.<br />
<br />
Naturally, Chris being Chris, he thinks his hair looks just fine. During the first [[Kacey Phone Call]], he enthusiastically (while pretending to be [[Liquid]]) [[Chris and his Ego|praised said haircut]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his [[Barbara Chandler|mom]] probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh... I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.}}<br />
<br />
If you were at all surprised to learn that Chris doesn't bother to go to a decent barber, but instead lets his mom cut his hair...well, you're new here, aren't you?[[Image:FutureCWC.jpg|thumb|What Chris will look like by next December.]]<br />
<br />
When confronted in the [[Mailbag]] ([[Mailbag 17#Chris's receding hairline disagrees|17]], [[Mailbag 25#Balding issues|25]] and [[Mailbag 28#He's also going bald|28]]) about his obviously thinning hair, Chris was, as per usual, completely in denial.<br />
<br />
In videos taken of Chris at a [[Fridays After Five]] event, a bald spot is seen starting to appear on the back of his head.<br />
<br />
[[File:TG9.jpg|thumb|Chris with longer hair]]<br />
[[File:Chris Long Hair.jpg|thumb|Chris with shoulder length hair.]]<br />
[[File:Hemanchristian.jpg|thumb|Tomgirl of Eternia]]<br />
<br />
Since becoming a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]], Chris has let his hair grow out and has seemingly attempted to color it blonde. This was likely not done by a professional stylist, because his new hair color is a hideous urine yellow. In some photos, such as the one he took at Salvation Army, the darker roots are visible through his extremely thin hair. It also appears that Chris's hair is naturally curly or wavy when he lets it grow long. Another possibility is that he curls his hair with a curling iron, although Chris is far too lax in his personal grooming for that type of styling regimen. An [[October 2012]] [[Facebook]] profile picture revealed Chris has grown his hair shoulder length.<br />
<br />
Recently, Barb forced Chris to have his hair cut. This resulted in Chris calling Barb a bitch. Chris saved the hair and wore it around his neck in hopes it would grow back faster. <ref>http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_26</ref><br />
<br />
==Hair mail==<br />
Cassie, co-founder of [[Sonichu Girls]], asked Chris for locks of his hairs so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as a souvenir.<br />
<br />
Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Troll|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair, placing it into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big [[China|C]] himself.<br />
<br />
Due to the Mexican postal service ([[Chris and race#Hispanics|insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here]]), it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.<br />
<br />
Cassie described the hair as being "greasy" and having an odd odor. Evidently, Chris's hair is so filthy, the Mexican postal service, which regularly "unknowingly" ships countless pounds of cocaine, marijuana, and other illegal narcotics per year, had trouble dealing with this biohazard. Fortunately, this violation of [http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode06/usc_sec_06_00001203----000-.html United States Code: Title 16, Chapter 4, SubChapter IV, § 1203 (a)(4-7)] did not cause any national or international incidents.<br />
<br />
While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's version of Spanish, with each side having a [[Sonichu]] drawing, where the [[Spanish]] side has [[Chris and race|Sonichu in a sombrero]].<br />
<br />
==Gallery of hair==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.<br />
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire collection of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])<br />
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it was his.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and health]]<br />
*[[HairDifference]]<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
</references><br />
<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Hair&diff=165984Hair2013-06-07T20:48:04Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Baldtotheextreme.jpg|thumb|right|"I am not balding; I had a haircut in that video that started that Damn Rumor."]]<br />
<br />
Soaked with grease and rapidly falling off, [[Chris]]'s '''hair''' is one of the many indicators of his unhealthy lifestyle.<br />
<br />
Already in atrocious physical condition for someone his age, Chris's baldness has made him look creepier and even more like a [[pedofork|pedophile]] and/or fat, old lesbian. His refusal to regularly bathe, which leaves his hair greasy and unmanageable, and his occasional attempts at crafting a combover haven't helped matters. <br />
<br />
A popular theory amongst [[trolls]] proposes that the baldness is a physical indicator of the [[stress]] Chris claims they put him through. More likely, though, Chris just drew an unlucky ticket in the genetic lottery. Photos of his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] show that Cole lost his hair up front relatively early in life as well, and [[Bob]] was bald as well. However, inactivity, poor diet, illness, and stress are well known to accelerate the balding process. In addition, there is a strong correlation between the man's age with the eventual extent of the baldness - when male-pattern baldness starts as early as it does with Chris, you will tend to end up with much less hair in the end; which does not bode well for Chris's [[tomgirl]] dreams.<br />
<br />
Naturally, Chris being Chris, he thinks his hair looks just fine. During the first [[Kacey Phone Call]], he enthusiastically (while pretending to be [[Liquid]]) [[Chris and his Ego|praised said haircut]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his [[Barbara Chandler|mom]] probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh... I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.}}<br />
<br />
If you were at all surprised to learn that Chris doesn't bother to go to a decent barber, but instead lets his mom cut his hair...well, you're new here, aren't you?[[Image:FutureCWC.jpg|thumb|What Chris will look like by next December.]]<br />
<br />
When confronted in the [[Mailbag]] ([[Mailbag 17#Chris's receding hairline disagrees|17]], [[Mailbag 25#Balding issues|25]] and [[Mailbag 28#He's also going bald|28]]) about his obviously thinning hair, Chris was, as per usual, completely in denial.<br />
<br />
In videos taken of Chris at a [[Fridays After Five]] event, a bald spot is seen starting to appear on the back of his head.<br />
<br />
[[File:TG9.jpg|thumb|Chris with longer hair]]<br />
[[File:Chris Long Hair.jpg|thumb|Chris with shoulder length hair.]]<br />
[[File:Hemanchristian.jpg|thumb|Tomgirl of Eternia]]<br />
<br />
Since becoming a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]], Chris has let his hair grow out and has seemingly attempted to color it blonde. This was likely not done by a professional stylist, because his new hair color is a hideous urine yellow. In some photos, such as the one he took at Salvation Army, the darker roots are visible through his extremely thin hair. It also appears that Chris's hair is naturally curly or wavy when he lets it grow long. Another possibility is that he curls his hair with a curling iron, although Chris is far too lax in his personal grooming for that type of styling regimen. An [[October 2012]] [[Facebook]] profile picture revealed Chris has grown his hair shoulder length.<br />
<br />
Recently, Barb forced Chris to have his hair cut. This resulted in Chris calling Barb a bitch. Chris saved the hair and wore it around his neck in hopes it would grow back faster. <ref>http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_26</ref><br />
<br />
==Hair mail==<br />
Cassie, co-founder of [[Sonichu Girls]], asked Chris for locks of his hairs so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as a souvenir.<br />
<br />
Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Troll|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair, placing it into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big [[China|C]] himself.<br />
<br />
Due to the Mexican postal service ([[Chris and race#Hispanics|insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here]]), it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.<br />
<br />
Cassie described the hair as being "greasy" and having an odd odor. Evidently, Chris's hair is so filthy, the Mexican postal service, which regularly "unknowingly" ships countless pounds of cocaine, marijuana, and other illegal narcotics per year, had trouble dealing with this biohazard. Fortunately, this violation of [http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode06/usc_sec_06_00001203----000-.html United States Code: Title 16, Chapter 4, SubChapter IV, § 1203 (a)(4-7)] did not cause any national or international incidents.<br />
<br />
While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's version of Spanish, with each side having a [[Sonichu]] drawing, where the [[Spanish]] side has [[Chris and race|Sonichu in a sombrero]].<br />
<br />
==Gallery of hair==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.<br />
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire collection of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])<br />
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it was his.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and health]]<br />
*[[HairDifference]]<br />
<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Hair&diff=165983Hair2013-06-07T20:41:13Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Baldtotheextreme.jpg|thumb|right|"I am not balding; I had a haircut in that video that started that Damn Rumor."]]<br />
<br />
Soaked with grease and rapidly falling off, [[Chris]]'s '''hair''' is one of the many indicators of his unhealthy lifestyle.<br />
<br />
Already in atrocious physical condition for someone his age, Chris's baldness has made him look creepier and even more like a [[pedofork|pedophile]] and/or fat, old lesbian. His refusal to regularly bathe, which leaves his hair greasy and unmanageable, and his occasional attempts at crafting a combover haven't helped matters. <br />
<br />
A popular theory amongst [[trolls]] proposes that the baldness is a physical indicator of the [[stress]] Chris claims they put him through. More likely, though, Chris just drew an unlucky ticket in the genetic lottery. Photos of his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] show that Cole lost his hair up front relatively early in life as well, and [[Bob]] was bald as well. However, inactivity, poor diet, illness, and stress are well known to accelerate the balding process. In addition, there is a strong correlation between the man's age with the eventual extent of the baldness - when male-pattern baldness starts as early as it does with Chris, you will tend to end up with much less hair in the end; which does not bode well for Chris's [[tomgirl]] dreams.<br />
<br />
Naturally, Chris being Chris, he thinks his hair looks just fine. During the first [[Kacey Phone Call]], he enthusiastically (while pretending to be [[Liquid]]) [[Chris and his Ego|praised said haircut]]:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Oh come on you know, ahh...I bet his [[Barbara Chandler|mom]] probably cut his hair and uh, that's uh... I think it looks good on him actually! I like his haircut. If I, I mean you know uh, I would probably get my hair cut that way in the near future.}}<br />
<br />
If you were at all surprised to learn that Chris doesn't bother to go to a decent barber, but instead lets his mom cut his hair...well, you're new here, aren't you?[[Image:FutureCWC.jpg|thumb|What Chris will look like by next December.]]<br />
<br />
When confronted in the [[Mailbag]] ([[Mailbag 17#Chris's receding hairline disagrees|17]], [[Mailbag 25#Balding issues|25]] and [[Mailbag 28#He's also going bald|28]]) about his obviously thinning hair, Chris was, as per usual, completely in denial.<br />
<br />
In videos taken of Chris at a [[Fridays After Five]] event, a bald spot is seen starting to appear on the back of his head.<br />
<br />
[[File:TG9.jpg|thumb|Chris with longer hair]]<br />
[[File:Chris Long Hair.jpg|thumb|Chris with shoulder length hair.]]<br />
[[File:Hemanchristian.jpg|thumb|Tomgirl of Eternia]]<br />
<br />
Since becoming a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]], Chris has let his hair grow out and has seemingly attempted to color it blonde. This was likely not done by a professional stylist, because his new hair color is a hideous urine yellow. In some photos, such as the one he took at Salvation Army, the darker roots are visible through his extremely thin hair. It also appears that Chris's hair is naturally curly or wavy when he lets it grow long. Another possibility is that he curls his hair with a curling iron, although Chris is far too lax in his personal grooming for that type of styling regimen. An [[October 2012]] [[Facebook]] profile picture revealed Chris has grown his hair shoulder length.<br />
<br />
Recently, Barb forced Chris to have his hair cut. This resulted in Chris calling Barb a bitch. Chris saved the hair and wore it around his neck in hopes it would grow back faster.<br />
<br />
==Hair mail==<br />
Cassie, co-founder of [[Sonichu Girls]], asked Chris for locks of his hairs so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as a souvenir.<br />
<br />
Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Troll|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair, placing it into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big [[China|C]] himself.<br />
<br />
Due to the Mexican postal service ([[Chris and race#Hispanics|insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here]]), it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.<br />
<br />
Cassie described the hair as being "greasy" and having an odd odor. Evidently, Chris's hair is so filthy, the Mexican postal service, which regularly "unknowingly" ships countless pounds of cocaine, marijuana, and other illegal narcotics per year, had trouble dealing with this biohazard. Fortunately, this violation of [http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode06/usc_sec_06_00001203----000-.html United States Code: Title 16, Chapter 4, SubChapter IV, § 1203 (a)(4-7)] did not cause any national or international incidents.<br />
<br />
While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's version of Spanish, with each side having a [[Sonichu]] drawing, where the [[Spanish]] side has [[Chris and race|Sonichu in a sombrero]].<br />
<br />
==Gallery of hair==<br />
<center><br />
<gallery><br />
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.<br />
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire collection of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])<br />
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it was his.<br />
</gallery><br />
</center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and health]]<br />
*[[HairDifference]]<br />
<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Sex_toys&diff=165715Sex toys2013-05-11T17:26:52Z<p>CaseHa: /* List of known sex toys */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Honest}}<br />
{{taxpayermoney}}<br />
[[Chris]] owns several '''sex toys''', including a vibrator and anal beads. <br />
<br />
Although he bought his first toys at a Spencer's Gifts storefront, his provider of choice is [[Wikipedia:Adam & Eve (business)|AdamEve.com]]. Chris claimed to the [[Sonichu Girls|TRUE and LOYAL Sonichu fanbase]] that most of the toys he owns were sent by the online sex shop as gifts. However, considering the fact that AdamEve.com usually allows customers to choose gifts, and if they are indeed random gifts, what they are depends on the [[homos|content of the purchase]] (not to mention Chris never bothering to dispose of or even complain about them).<br />
<br />
Chris has also visited [[Charlottesville]] sex shop [[IRC (26 November 2008)|Ultimate Bliss]], where he bought a chocolate-flavored condom in hopes of using it for his first time having sex with [[PandaHalo]]. In the aftermath of her untimely death in the Australian brushfires, it's not known what became of the condom, or whether Chris has found a way to get himself banned from the store as he has so many other local retailers.<br />
<br />
When asked about his visit to the brick and mortar sex store in the [[Mailbag|CWCipedia Mailbag]], Chris responded with a short answer before placing the email in the rejected bin:<br />
<br />
{{Quote|I have been there; I recommend WOMAN-Shaped Blow-Up Dolls, the masturbation tubes with the Vaginal-Designed Openings, and ALL their Videos that feature Woman-and-Man or Woman-and-Woman or one-man-and-multiple-women sexual acts. | Chris, [[Rejected Mailbag|recommending STRAIGHT sex toys for STRAIGHT men]]}}<br />
<br />
==List of known sex toys==<br />
[[Image:VelvetTouchMasturbator.jpg|thumb|right|"...a velvety smooth squeeze that your [[duck|erection]] will crave again and again!"]]<br />
* Penis pump<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref><br />
* Vibrator ([[Captain's Log, Stardate February 6th, 2009|possibly KIA]])<br />
* Four sex dolls including [[Officer Nasty]], [[Kimmi]], a [http://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/love-dolls/sp-booty-licious-love-doll-4085.asp Booty Licious Love Doll] and a [http://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/love-dolls/sp-yumi-asian-anime-doll-15164.aspx Yumi Asian Anime Doll] (used on [[Chris and Jackie's Date]].) His order records show that he has purchased at least three Officer Nasty dolls, suggesting that they don't survive too long underneath his considerable girth. He stated in a chat with [[Vanessa]] that "After a while of putting [[Obesity|my weight]] carefully on them in the artificial intercourse, they each would have a hole punctured on the inside from my weight, which was irrepairable." In a chat with [[Jackie]], he said the Booty Licious doll suffered the same fate, and that his dolls lasted "at most 27 intercourses".<ref>[[Jackie Chat 1]]</ref><br />
* Anal beads – Chris used these once. Describing the experience during a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN chat]], he explained that they became "covered in poo," and he threw them away.<br />
* Dildo – Gift that went along with a purchase. Chris put a condom on it and stuck it up his ass.<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3]]</ref><br />
* Three different penis rings (Pearl Beaded Prolong Ring, Silicone Superstud Power Ring, and Ringo's Cock Ring)<br />
* Velvet Touch Masturbator and Pink Passion Masturbator<br />
* A&E Hot Action Lotion<br />
<br />
==Gallery of sex toy purchases==<br />
<br />
<center><gallery><br />
Image:Adameve 06-09-16.PNG|<br />
Image:Adameve 06-9-17.PNG|<br />
Image:Adameve 07-03-10.PNG|<br />
Image:Adameve 07-07-07.PNG|<br />
Image:Adameve 07-12-26.PNG|Where Chris buys Kimmi.<br />
</gallery></center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and sex]]<br />
*[[Semen]]<br />
*[[Kimmi]]<br />
*[[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases]]<br />
*[[Officer Nasty]]<br />
*[[Chris Destroys His Vibrator]]<br />
*[[Plush Breasts]]<br />
<br />
== Sources ==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://loltheinterwebs.googlepages.com/chriswishlist.pdf Chris's wishlist on AdamEve.com]<br />
*[http://megaupload.com/?d=18NA6ERG Chris fucking a sex doll]<br />
{{Love quest}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Things Chris has had Sex with]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Sex_toys&diff=165714Sex toys2013-05-11T17:21:15Z<p>CaseHa: /* List of known sex toys */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Honest}}<br />
{{taxpayermoney}}<br />
[[Chris]] owns several '''sex toys''', including a vibrator and anal beads. <br />
<br />
Although he bought his first toys at a Spencer's Gifts storefront, his provider of choice is [[Wikipedia:Adam & Eve (business)|AdamEve.com]]. Chris claimed to the [[Sonichu Girls|TRUE and LOYAL Sonichu fanbase]] that most of the toys he owns were sent by the online sex shop as gifts. However, considering the fact that AdamEve.com usually allows customers to choose gifts, and if they are indeed random gifts, what they are depends on the [[homos|content of the purchase]] (not to mention Chris never bothering to dispose of or even complain about them).<br />
<br />
Chris has also visited [[Charlottesville]] sex shop [[IRC (26 November 2008)|Ultimate Bliss]], where he bought a chocolate-flavored condom in hopes of using it for his first time having sex with [[PandaHalo]]. In the aftermath of her untimely death in the Australian brushfires, it's not known what became of the condom, or whether Chris has found a way to get himself banned from the store as he has so many other local retailers.<br />
<br />
When asked about his visit to the brick and mortar sex store in the [[Mailbag|CWCipedia Mailbag]], Chris responded with a short answer before placing the email in the rejected bin:<br />
<br />
{{Quote|I have been there; I recommend WOMAN-Shaped Blow-Up Dolls, the masturbation tubes with the Vaginal-Designed Openings, and ALL their Videos that feature Woman-and-Man or Woman-and-Woman or one-man-and-multiple-women sexual acts. | Chris, [[Rejected Mailbag|recommending STRAIGHT sex toys for STRAIGHT men]]}}<br />
<br />
==List of known sex toys==<br />
[[Image:VelvetTouchMasturbator.jpg|thumb|right|"...a velvety smooth squeeze that your [[duck|erection]] will crave again and again!"]]<br />
* Penis pump<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref><br />
* Vibrator ([[Captain's Log, Stardate February 6th, 2009|possibly KIA]])<br />
* Four sex dolls including [[Officer Nasty]], [[Kimmi]], a [http://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/love-dolls/sp-booty-licious-love-doll-4085.aspx Booty Licious Love Doll] and a [http://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/love-dolls/sp-yumi-asian-anime-doll-15164.aspx Yumi Asian Anime Doll] (used on Chris and Jackie's date) His order records show that he has purchased at least three Officer Nasty dolls, suggesting that they don't survive too long underneath his considerable girth. He stated in a chat with [[Vanessa]] that "After a while of putting [[Obesity|my weight]] carefully on them in the artificial intercourse, they each would have a hole punctured on the inside from my weight, which was irrepairable." In a chat with [[Jackie]], he said the Booty Licious doll suffered the same fate, and that his dolls lasted "at most 27 intercourses".<ref>[[Jackie Chat 1]]</ref><br />
* Anal beads – Chris used these once. Describing the experience during a [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|PSN chat]], he explained that they became "covered in poo," and he threw them away.<br />
* Dildo – Gift that went along with a purchase. Chris put a condom on it and stuck it up his ass.<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3]]</ref><br />
* Three different penis rings (Pearl Beaded Prolong Ring, Silicone Superstud Power Ring, and Ringo's Cock Ring)<br />
* Velvet Touch Masturbator and Pink Passion Masturbator<br />
* A&E Hot Action Lotion<br />
<br />
==Gallery of sex toy purchases==<br />
<br />
<center><gallery><br />
Image:Adameve 06-09-16.PNG|<br />
Image:Adameve 06-9-17.PNG|<br />
Image:Adameve 07-03-10.PNG|<br />
Image:Adameve 07-07-07.PNG|<br />
Image:Adameve 07-12-26.PNG|Where Chris buys Kimmi.<br />
</gallery></center><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Chris and sex]]<br />
*[[Semen]]<br />
*[[Kimmi]]<br />
*[[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases]]<br />
*[[Officer Nasty]]<br />
*[[Chris Destroys His Vibrator]]<br />
*[[Plush Breasts]]<br />
<br />
== Sources ==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://loltheinterwebs.googlepages.com/chriswishlist.pdf Chris's wishlist on AdamEve.com]<br />
*[http://megaupload.com/?d=18NA6ERG Chris fucking a sex doll]<br />
{{Love quest}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Things Chris has had Sex with]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Talk:Chris_and_Jackie%27s_Date&diff=165713Talk:Chris and Jackie's Date2013-05-11T17:13:50Z<p>CaseHa: /* To do */</p>
<hr />
<div>==To do==<br />
<br />
*I did my best at transcribing, but he mumbles a lot. Help with those ''[Unintelligible]'' bits would be great.<br />
*Why did he do this? Do we know?<br />
*When was this? Was Bob dead yet?<br />
*Last video needs to be transcribed.<br />
<br />
Just an Observation here. Is that sex doll he is using the Asian love doll that we haven't seen yet?<br />
--[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 10:12, 11 May 2013 (PDT)<br />
<br />
== Different bathroom ==<br />
<br />
Correcting [after 10 seconds, he turns the sex doll around into the doggy-style position before it goes off-camera, the blow-up doll going head first into his mold-coated shower/tub.] - That isn't the bathroom at 14 Branchland Court. It's probably likely that Rocky sorted them out with some temporary accomodation while men in hazmat suits go and kill all the bugs in his house. Check the Dr Perron/Rocky Shoemaker call. --[[User:IThrewTheFrisbee|IThrewTheFrisbee]] 09:25, 26 February 2012 (PST)<br />
*No, that's definitely his bathroom. Check the other videos set in his bathroom.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 11:21, 26 February 2012 (PST)</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Talk:Chris_and_Jackie%27s_Date&diff=165712Talk:Chris and Jackie's Date2013-05-11T17:12:32Z<p>CaseHa: /* To do */</p>
<hr />
<div>==To do==<br />
<br />
*I did my best at transcribing, but he mumbles a lot. Help with those ''[Unintelligible]'' bits would be great.<br />
*Why did he do this? Do we know?<br />
*When was this? Was Bob dead yet?<br />
*Last video needs to be transcribed.<br />
<br />
Just an Observation here. Is that sex all he using the Asian love doll that we haven't seen yet?<br />
--[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 10:12, 11 May 2013 (PDT)<br />
<br />
== Different bathroom ==<br />
<br />
Correcting [after 10 seconds, he turns the sex doll around into the doggy-style position before it goes off-camera, the blow-up doll going head first into his mold-coated shower/tub.] - That isn't the bathroom at 14 Branchland Court. It's probably likely that Rocky sorted them out with some temporary accomodation while men in hazmat suits go and kill all the bugs in his house. Check the Dr Perron/Rocky Shoemaker call. --[[User:IThrewTheFrisbee|IThrewTheFrisbee]] 09:25, 26 February 2012 (PST)<br />
*No, that's definitely his bathroom. Check the other videos set in his bathroom.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 11:21, 26 February 2012 (PST)</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Talk:Chris_in_the_media&diff=164934Talk:Chris in the media2013-03-16T00:56:25Z<p>CaseHa: /* Chris and the Media */</p>
<hr />
<div>==To do==<br />
You know how some of you folks wanted articles just about the radio appearance by Chris? Well congratulations, you have this page.<br />
<br />
Ideally, this page serves to document all the appearances made by Chris in the media, ideally focusing on traditional media (TV, newspapers, radio, etc.). We could throw in the high profile sites like Fark, The Atlantic, etc. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:04, 17 October 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
Seriously, put media appearances here. I don't want to see articles like "Chris on the Radio" because then we'd need "Chris on TV," "Chris on the Blogosphere," "Chris in newspapers," "Chris in the middle of the street screaming," which defeats the purpose of this article. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:53, 23 October 2009 (CEST)<br />
<br />
== Internets section ==<br />
<br />
I swear to GodBearJesus, I will personally find whoever adds troll-related material to the Internets section and cut off their [[duck]] or sew up their [[china]]. [[User:KarryLing|KarryLing]] 23:06, 24 August 2010 (PDT)<br />
<br />
-I'm probably just being biased, but is the Atop the Fourth Wall reference really needed? I don't really know if that's high profile enough to merit a mentioning. [[User:Admiral Klank|Admiral Klank]] 21:16, 27 October 2010 (PDT)<br />
:Hey! Linkara is even more internet famous than Chris. Also, HE IS A MAN! *punch* --[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 21:20, 27 October 2010 (PDT)<br />
<br />
==Notability blogs==<br />
This is my wikifag in me coming out, but can someone establish the notability of some of the sites mentioned in the Internet media section? Obviously Fark is high profile, Harry Partridge definitely, but how about this Linkara fellow? Or Heavy.com? Or SpliceToday? I ask because I don't want people getting the idea that any time some YouTube ranter mentions Chris, it deserves a mention. Are these sources notable in any substantive way? Maybe someone who's familiar with these sites could chime in.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:11, 26 September 2011 (PDT)<br />
*Linkara is the creator of Atop The Fourth Wall, a web show reviewing bad comic books. It's one of the most popular series on That Guy With the Glasses.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 20:34, 26 September 2011 (PDT)<br />
*While I don't know much about this Linkara guy, the wikipedia article on That Guy with the Glasses has a [[wikipedia:That Guy with the Glasses#Atop the Fourth Wall|section]] about Atop The Fourth Wall. As well as that an entry on Linkara also exists on wikipedia but not as an article of it's own but as a redirect to That Guy with the Glasses. I think that makes him notable enough to have his comments about Sonichu incorporated in this article. - [[User:NegaCWC|NegaCWC]] 12:38, 27 September 2011 (PDT)<br />
<br />
== Sonichu ==<br />
<br />
Heh, would Sonichu be notable enough for its own Wikipedia article? [[User:Barry|Barry]] 15:52, 27 September 2011 (PDT)<br />
<br />
== Chris and the Media ==<br />
<br />
Is that a possibility for helping to flesh this page out?<br />
<br />
Just my own suggestion.[[User:Darkspecteranon|Darkspecteranon]] 23:25, 27 September 2011 (PDT). <br /> we gotta add Failosophy to this list, including the reactions of the hosts. Anyone know how to embed a non-YouTube vid--[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 17:56, 15 March 2013 (PDT)<br />
<br />
== Dead link ==<br />
<br />
During several automated bot runs the following external link was found to be unavailable. Please check if the link is in fact down and fix or remove it in that case!<br />
<br />
* http://www.wbcn.com/topic/play_window.php?audioType=Episode&audioId=3705145<br />
** In [[Chris in the media]] on 2011-09-20 22:30:50, 404 Not Found<br />
** In [[Chris in the media]] on 2011-09-28 08:02:13, 404 Not Found<br />
<br />
--[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 01:01, 28 September 2011 (PDT)<br />
<br />
== I am better than your kids. ==<br />
<br />
I saw one of Chris's drawings on a website. Should it go under this or the drawing itself?<br />
:A) Learn to sign your posts. You just need to put four Tildas (~) at the end of it. B) If I'm not mistaken the ''I Am Better than Your Kids'' website is written by Maddox, same guy who does ''The Best Page in the Universe''. Since he's important enough to have a [[wikipedia:Maddox (writer)|wikipedia article]] I'm guessing that him discussing Chris on one of his website is significant enough to warrant a mention of it in this article. [[User:NegaCWC|NegaCWC]] 10:05, 19 May 2012 (PDT)<br />
<br />
== Chris was mentioned in Trollsnews ==<br />
<br />
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHxiQVwMboI&feature=g-all-u The latest episode of Trollsnews] reported on Chris's trial. Is this notable enough for inclusion? [[User:Grandma Nazi|Grandma Nazi]] 14:57, 28 July 2012 (PDT)</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Talk:2013&diff=164933Talk:20132013-03-16T00:51:04Z<p>CaseHa: /* Failosophy */</p>
<hr />
<div>==why am important??==<br />
* Chris uploaded another photo on Febuary 1 [[http://m.facebook.com/pages/Christian-Weston-Chandler/167832525915?id=167832525915&_rdr]] [[User:14recinez|14recinez]] 17:50, 23 Febuary 2013 (EST)<br />
Who cares that the DSM-V is coming out, unless the APA is reclassifying high-function autism as something else? If that is the case, we should make a note of it. [[User:Giantgroundsloth|Giantgroundsloth]] 19:27, 20 January 2012 (PST)<br />
*I really don't see why this is relevant to Chris, it's interesting, and I understand that they're redefining Asperger syndrome but unless Chris mentions it, it really doesn't belong here. It comes off as filler. Seriously, we've got a year, we don't need an entire page to 2013 yet. Hell, Chris might die this year or go to prison or something, we might not even need a 2013 page. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:48, 21 January 2012 (PST)<br />
** Seriously though, this page is really unnecessary. The only two events listed are birthdays. Why should we not then create a page for 2014 (Chris turns 31, Barb turns 73) and for 2015 and for 2016 and so on ad infinitum? Why not just delete it? [[User:Giantgroundsloth|Giantgroundsloth]] 16:35, 22 January 2012 (PST)<br />
::*Good thinking, I don't know why I didn't see that. But since it's almost 2013, I think we should stop making articles for individual months, unless Chris comes back to the Internet which I highly doubt. So instead of linking to [[January 2013]], we'd just make a subsection on this page, i.e. 2013#January. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 01:24, 30 December 2012 (PST)<br />
==Probation==<br />
Due to Chris's probation ending on the July 10th, I think I should be worth noting that July 2013 might start up more of the Chris trolling as his community service ends, and assuming he wouldn't have learnt anything other than not to run people over. --The <b>TRUE</b> and <b>HONEST</b> [[User:Smugleaf|Smugleaf Tsutarja]] 18:33, 25 January 2013 (PST)<br />
<br />
* Well we will just have to wait and see what happens. He has been extremly unactive recently. [[User:14recinez|14recinez]] 17:53, 23 Febuary 2013 (EST)<br />
<br />
== Failosophy ==<br />
<br />
We should probably add info on him being on Failosophy, and maybe create a page for it if Chris [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|goes bonkers about it]].<br />
--[[User:Skoodles|Skoodles]] 13:45, 15 March 2013 (PDT)<br />
He wrote a long FB comment about it, with a response from one of the hosts ( I think) and a bunch of other comments from his fans asking for more sonichu--[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 17:51, 15 March 2013 (PDT)</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=File_talk:TG19.jpg&diff=139217File talk:TG19.jpg2011-05-06T00:07:14Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>there is a chain around his neck in this photo.. is it just a regular necklace, or could the rosechu medallion be hanging just out of frame? [[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 00:20, 29 April 2011 (PDT)<br />
:That's a good catch. Could be a medallion, though I assume the chain he used in the medallions was the cheapest and closest chain he could find, so he could just have made another necklace. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 01:03, 29 April 2011 (PDT)<br />
<br />
This pic is flipped l/r - should it be changed back? [[User:Eamoo|Eamoo]] 07:05, 2 May 2011 (PDT)<br />
<br />
Going to be perfectly TRUE and HONEST here, at least tomgirl Chris has cleaner hair--[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 17:07, 5 May 2011 (PDT)</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Autism_Tutorial_Extra&diff=135018Autism Tutorial Extra2011-02-23T18:39:26Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{quote|'''Ja!'''|Hans Asperger}}<br />
<br />
'''Autism Tutorial Extra''' is a ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' level created by [[Chris]] where he proves, [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|once again]] that he's in complete denial of what [[Asperger syndrome]] really is. Interestingly, the level works in the same way for the [[Autism Tutorial]], as the [[Sub-Episodes]] did for the [[Sonichu comic]], namely with Chris proving his superiority over an obvious strawman by psychically assaulting him and then prattling on about how much unbearable torment the strawman in question has inflicted upon him. Chris also mispronounces Asperger as “Ass Burger” the entire time, [[Jack_Thaddeus_Phone_Call_2|showing he's learned nothing]].<br />
<br />
Interestingly, though Chris lambastes Asperger for not leaving the term autism "as it was," "autism" was initially used to describe narcissistic symptoms of schizophrenia before Asperger's 1938 lecture. Asperger's work helped distinguish autism as we know it today from more dangerous mental disorders.<br />
<br />
Chris doesn't like being referred to as an "Autistic psychopath", the name of Hans' 1938 paper. The paper, Die "Autistischen Psychopathen" translates to 'autistic personality disorder', never referring to autistics as psycopaths. Translating German to English can be added to the list of things Chris fails at.<br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
<Center>{{#ev:youtube|Am4f9P5LPs8}}</Center><br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
[[Image:Hans_asperger.jpg|thumb|right|Dr. Hans Asperger was a famed pediatrician whose work to improve the quality of life for autistic children earned him international renown and the admiration of thousands.]]<br />
[[Image:Aspergered.jpg|thumb|right|In this video, Chris beats him up because he doesn't like his last name.]]<br />
And now, ladies and gentlemen, because apparently after you decided to watch last part--after watching the Autism Tutorial, we have a special guest for you today! Please put your hands together for a reasonably facsimile of, Mr. Hans Asperger!<br />
<br />
(Hans Asperger is seen at the far end of the stage. He has gigantic bulging eyes and wears a crown. Chris walks over to join him, standing [[Homos|almost intimately close]] to shake his hand, as a backdrop and desk fall from the sky to complete the talk-show atmosphere. After Chris walks over to his desk, Hans smiles and waves to an audience silent as the grave.)<br />
<br />
I am your host, Christian Chandler, on this '''[[Duck|short]]''' talk show. And this is Mr. Hans Asperger. Now, let's talk about him for a bit: Now, apparently--Mr. Hans Asperger. From the Vienna University Hospital in 1938--Oh, how ''recent!''--you gave a lecture in Germany, on "[[Chris|Autistic Psychopaths]]", after investigating a mild form of Autism. Isn't that right, Hans?<br />
<br />
(Hans turns to face Chris.)<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!<br />
<br />
And also, apparently, this separate diagnosis, as it is quoted, was not recognized until 1981. Only one year before I was born. Although coined from your name, Mr. Asperger, apparently a Mr. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leo_Kanner Leo Kanner] took the study much further and established the term "Early Infantile Autism". Do you applaud Mr. Kanner for his work?<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!<br />
<br />
''I see''. Now, in my feeling alone--possibly mutual with others--the name Asperger. It strikes me badly, and I feel offended just by hearing the word. Do you feel I have the right to my own opinions and feelings as an individual person, Hans?<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja! (It is clear by now that Hans does not understand English.)<br />
<br />
Thank you very much, good sir. Now, do you feel--do you feel bad about having a name that sounds like a bad cut of cow meat?<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!<br />
<br />
Do you feel that I, Christian Weston Chandler, do not deserve any blame or punishment for having an opinion of a single word, such as Asperger?<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!<br />
<br />
Do you have a general understanding about how I feel about you now?<br />
<br />
(Something falls from the sky and lands atop Chris's desk.)<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!<br />
<br />
(Chris walks over to Hans again, once again intimately close.)<br />
<br />
Are you ''positive'' you really understand how I feel about you, Mr. Hans Asperger?<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!<br />
<br />
(Chris gives a wide, deceptive smile as he goes back and forth with Hans.)<br />
<br />
[[Random Access Humor|Yeah?<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!<br />
<br />
Yeah?<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!<br />
<br />
Yeah?<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja!]]<br />
<br />
(Chris is suddenly very annoyed. He bitch-slaps Hans to the ground. It is also revealed that Hans has a tail.) <br />
<br />
[[Wikipedia:Baka_(fool)|Baka]]!<br />
<br />
(Hans quickly regains his footing, facing away from Chris and looking over his shoulder in terror.)<br />
<br />
I feel dislike towards you! For selfishly putting your ill name in association with autism! And with a name like Asperger! I feel it only makes us Autistic kind sound ''even worse!'' ''Aspergers.'' You shoulda left it as it was!. Autism is autism! And in your research you linked it up with psychopaths! I feel even more offended at ''that!'' Now get out of my sight!<br />
<br />
'''Hans:''' Ja! (Hans quickly runs off the stage.)<br />
<br />
(Chris looks out over the audience, crossing his hands in front of him.)<br />
<br />
I do apologize for that, uh, rude outburst, [[Trolls|folks]]. But then again, that was just the way I felt and have been feeling about the word "Asperger" since I first heard it a few years ago. It is my second least favorite word, where my first least favorite of all time is "[[Naive]]". Again, I apologize if I came off as bad to anybody, or made them feel bad, for the way I acted. But then again, I do get emotional and carried away sometimes. Thank you for watching, and have a good, safe, and blessed day.<br />
<br />
(The game cuts to Hans standing in some sort of Level Completion area, still terrified. He stands there, legs quaking, as the screen behind him rattles off the achievements. Some tiny explosions of what appear to be glass go off around Hans's head as the video ends.)<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Autism Tutorial|Autism Tutorial Videos]]|prevlink=[[Autism Tutorial Part 6]]|nextlink=[[Autism Tutorial Extra|Current]]|}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:LittleBigPlanet]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=2010&diff=13451620102011-02-15T19:24:02Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[File:WantWoman.jpg|thumb|[[Chris]] in [[2010]].]]<br />
<br />
'''2010''' marks the second consecutive year of organized trolling of [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. Fed up with his trolls, Chris spent several months offline, attempting to hide from his infamous reputation. As such, the year was punctuated by dry spells. And yet, Chris still found new ways to embarrass himself.<br />
<br />
A box of condoms Chris had bought for his first sexual encounter had expired.<br />
<br />
==January==<br />
{{main|January 2010}}<br />
[[Image:EloquentArgument.JPG|thumb|left|On 17 January, Chris expresses his opinion on ''[[Asperchu/Background|Asperchu]]''.]]<br />
<br />
Smug with overconfidence thanks to his [[Mailbag|fanmail]] and the victory over [[gay]] ads, Chris charged into January, not even allowing the shut down of the [[CWCipedia]] via [[copyright]] claims stop him. However, Chris would soon find a new [[stress]] factor in the emerging fan comic ''[[Asperchu]]'', going to great lengths to pull his fans away from it via various crazy [[YouTube]] videos; every attempt failed miserably. As he did, Chris continued to update [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], revealing more of his madness. Unbeknown to trolls, he was actually beginning to get close to [[The Wallflower|another girl]] and he would attempt to hide this, but his own [[ego]] would refuse to let him do so.<br />
<br />
==February==<br />
{{main|February 2010}}<br />
[[File:Evan'sDeath.JPG|thumb|On '''25 February''', Chris murders [[Evan]] and the rest of the [[Asperpedia]] Four in brutal and disgusting ways.]]<br />
<br />
As January became February, Chris found himself embroiled in a series of phone calls from ''[[Asperchu]]'' creator Alec Benson Leary, where Alec demanded that Chris promise to be more tolerant of ''Asperchu'' and to get rid of [[Simonla Rosechu]], with [[Mao]] holding the [[CWCipedia]] hostage. Though Chris gradually recovered enough from the stress to complete ''Sonichu'' #10, which showed the death of Simonla, Chris then had [[Alec]], [[Mao]] and two other people killed within the same comic as an act of childish retaliation. Chris recovered just in time for his birthday, producing a shameless display of self-praising by declaring the first annual [[Christian Love Day]]. Perhaps the biggest mystery revealed this month was the sudden appearance of [[Magical Man Potion|another human male]] entering Chris's [[room]], one of the more puzzling developments to come out of Chris for some time.<br />
<br />
==March==<br />
{{main|March 2010}}<br />
[[File:Owllevel.jpg|thumb|left|On '''9 March''', Chris uploads a new ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' level that would inadvertendly reveal the identity of [[The Wallflower]].]]<br />
<br />
As March began, trolls showed concern over news that Chris's father, [[Bob]], had been hospitalized with congestive heart failure. Sadly, Chris showed no concern whatsoever, angering his [[fanbase]]. A few days later, Chris would, through his massive [[ego|narcissism]], reveal a name of his potential new [[sweetheart]] through a custom ''[[Little Big Planet|LBP]]'' level. Dedicated trolls would discover [[The Wallflower|her identity]], and one faggot would cause the [[gal-pal]] to cut ties with Chris and Chris himself discovering the [[CWCki]]. At that point, Chris began an all-out war against the [[Internet]], attacking his [[fans]] for wanting more ''Sonichu'' pages, attacking the CWCki, and especially attacking [[Surfshack Tito]], the troll who took credit for destroying the [[lulz]]. However, [[Rocky Shoemaker|an outside source]] would intervene, forcing Chris to once again announce he was leaving the Internet forever. (36 hours after making this bold and bombastic claim, Chris returned with a new video to complain about [[TV]] and [[sex]].)<br />
<br />
==April==<br />
{{main|April 2010}}<br />
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|On '''5 April''', Chris's second [[The Hook Cafe]] ad is discovered.]]<br />
<br />
As April started, Chris's activity on the Internet was sporadic. However, trolls soon discovered an ad on [[The Hook Cafe]], discovering that Chris was back to his [[Love Quest]] on the Internet. During this time, Chris would meet and begin talking to a woman named [[Jackie]], who would become Chris's focus throughout the month. Having learned something from the previous incidents, Chris kept a low profile on her, which however did not prevent some highly-disturbing material to eventually leak to general public. During this time, he attempted to return to [[The GAMe PLACe]] in an attempt to lift his ban; the trolls hailed [[Michael Snyder]] as a hero when he kicked the anti-Semitic manchild out again. Chris would also work on CWCipedia a bit more, creating profiles for his characters and a page about all of his past sweethearts.<br />
<br />
==May==<br />
{{main|May 2010}}<br />
[[File:MODNATION_2.JPG|thumb|left|On '''May 26''', Chris begs for ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' bonuses.]]<br />
<br />
As May started, it seemed that things were going to be slow again, with a relative high point of smug Chris boasting that he had removed a "bug" allegedly planted by trolls in the [[PS3|life upgrade]]. However, he soon became severely depressed and blamed his problems of rejection by everyone on a conspiracy conceived against him by the [[Greene County]] School Board. By the end of the month, Mao opened up the [[CWCipedia]] to everyone. Chris attempted to revert their vandalism, but soon gave into stress and abandoned the website. Two series of [[e-mails]] are also leaked.<br />
<br />
==June==<br />
{{main|June 2010}}<br />
[[File:GrayScaleChris.jpg|thumb|On '''30 June''', Chris looks for [[love]] on [[Flipnote Hatena]].]]<br />
<br />
After Chris's fourth threat to leave the Internet, many fully expected that he would not keep to his word. The silence was however broken after Chris traveled to The GAMe PLACe with an autistic plan of revenge against Michael Snyder; long story short, Chris almost committed [[Son-Chu|vehicular]] homicide while [[Alcohol|drunk]] and was let off scot-free by the [[police]]. He then made a video addressing these events, and announced that he would be leaving the Internet. ([[Chris and hypocrisy|Again]]. [[Youtube Finale|For]] [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|the]] [[100 2188|fifth]] [[100 2189|time]].) Things fell silent for nearly two weeks, until a field agent spotted Chris at the [[Fridays After Five]] event in [[Charlottesville]], continuing his [[Love Quest]] offline by acting [[pedofork|really creepy]] in public. Soon, trolls also discovered where Chris had disappeared to online: the [[Flipnote Hatena]], a website created by [[Nintendo]] for users to share their amateur animations.<br />
<br />
==July==<br />
{{main|July 2010}}<br />
[[Image:FAF-06092010.jpg|thumb|left|On '''9 July''', Chris continues stalking girls at [[Fridays After Five]].]]<br />
<br />
July 2010 was another very quiet month. It began with Chris getting [[List_of places that have banned Chris|permabanned]] from [[Flipnote Hatena]] for constantly breaking the site's rules. For a time after that he emerged from the internets to enjoy the fruits of real life... by reverting back to the ancient ways of the [[attraction sign]]. He was spotted once at [[McIntire Park]] and twice at [[Fridays After Five]]. However, on 17 July he returned to [[Twitter]], telling [[trolls|his loyal fans]] that he's [[lie|working on the comic pages]]. On 24 July he also evaded his Flipnote Hatena ban and re-posted some of his removed flipnotes, suggesting that he bought another DSi just to use a children's website as his personal dating service.<br />
<br />
==August==<br />
<br />
{{main|August 2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:PostCar.JPG|thumb|On '''29 August''', the [[life upgrade]] goes GAME OVER, man.]]<br />
<br />
During the first half of August, Chris didn't give off any signs of life except for a brief sighting at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]], kicking a stall of [[HEXBox]] games. It was suspected he spent his time playing [[video games]]. However, a phone call to Bob Chandler was released, relieving some new info. He would then return on August 27 to post two videos, one concerning his upcoming high school reunion, and the other where Chris concedes to the trolls after reformatting his PS3, claiming [[fail|he did himself in]]. Two days later, Chris would destroy his PS3, and there was much rejoicing.<br />
<br />
==September==<br />
<br />
{{main|September 2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:Niggocwc.jpg|thumb|left|On '''16 September''', Chris dressed as a [[niggo]].]]<br />
<br />
Early in September, e-mail correspondence was leaked that provided some background on the destruction of the [[Ps3|life upgrade]]. Quite predictably, Chris purchased another PS3 almost immediately. [[Jackie]] officially returned as a new [[sweetheart]] in Chris's life, with him trying to impress through new videos on YouTube, including attacks at Jackie's ex-boyfriend, Lars. Also this month, a bunch of ancient documents dating back from 2008 and 2009 were released to the public by [[Clyde Cash]], followed by some more from early 2010, including [[Wallflower_E-mails|correspondence between Chris and The Wallflower]]. Towards the end of the month, Chris officially kicked off his "anti-troll movement".<br />
<br />
==October==<br />
<br />
{{main|October 2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:Grimace.jpg|thumb|On '''4 October''', Chris [[cosplay]]s as [[McDonalds|the Grimace.]]]]<br />
<br />
October began with Chris acting just as crazy as in September, if not crazier. He made another half-assed apology to Michael Snyder and then proceeded to start dressing up in a large variety of [[cosplay|costumes]] made out of construction paper, which dominated the first half of the month. He also made two scary and confusing videos in which he gave birth to a baby [[bear]], used his manboobs for a breast cancer awareness ad, and more. Some of the videos were actually shot outside of the [[room]] or even the [[house]] altogether, featuring Chris driving his mom's car and even going for a "hike". The conflict with Lars also continued, however on seemingly low-level. October 2010 is notable of sheer number of [[videos]] that were released by Chris, including more than a dozen a day twice, making it by far the most active month so far (albeit quality of them varied a lot). In the meantime, Clyde kept releasing even more previously unseen historical documents.<br />
<br />
==November==<br />
{{main|November 2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|left|On '''6 November''', a video of Chris struggling to do pull-ups was leaked.]]<br />
<br />
November turned out to be a slow month. Chris had a call with Lars and a video of him failing to do pull-ups was leaked the same day. Chris would then go quiet for two weeks, until he quit the Internet for the 6th time on 22 November and deleting most of his other [[YouTube]] videos in the progress.<br />
<br />
==December==<br />
{{main|December 2010}}<br />
<br />
December began under the shadow of Chris's sixth attempt to leave the Internet in favor of playing [[vidya]] all the time. The final batch of e-mails between Chris and Jackie were released. As usual, Chris did not get [[All I Want For Christmas Is a Pretty Girlfriend| a girlfriend for Christmas]], for the sixth time since [[2004]]. {{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Video summary==<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The Chris Chan 2010 Year in Review<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ugFEQ9gYmq0}}<br />
| stardate = 28 [[December 2010]]<br />
| maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/MiHiVidz MiHiVidz]<br />
| subject = [[Chris]]<br />
| type = Compilation<br />
}}<br />
<br />
{{Timeline}}<br />
[[Category:Chronology]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=2010&diff=13451520102011-02-15T19:23:40Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[File:WantWoman.jpg|thumb|[[Chris]] in [[2010]].]]<br />
<br />
'''2010''' marks the second consecutive year of organized trolling of [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. Fed up with his trolls, Chris spent several months offline, attempting to hide from his infamous reputation. As such, the year was punctuated by dry spells. And yet, Chris still found new ways to embarrass himself.<br />
<br />
A box of condoms, Chris had bought for his first sexual encounter had expired.<br />
<br />
==January==<br />
{{main|January 2010}}<br />
[[Image:EloquentArgument.JPG|thumb|left|On 17 January, Chris expresses his opinion on ''[[Asperchu/Background|Asperchu]]''.]]<br />
<br />
Smug with overconfidence thanks to his [[Mailbag|fanmail]] and the victory over [[gay]] ads, Chris charged into January, not even allowing the shut down of the [[CWCipedia]] via [[copyright]] claims stop him. However, Chris would soon find a new [[stress]] factor in the emerging fan comic ''[[Asperchu]]'', going to great lengths to pull his fans away from it via various crazy [[YouTube]] videos; every attempt failed miserably. As he did, Chris continued to update [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], revealing more of his madness. Unbeknown to trolls, he was actually beginning to get close to [[The Wallflower|another girl]] and he would attempt to hide this, but his own [[ego]] would refuse to let him do so.<br />
<br />
==February==<br />
{{main|February 2010}}<br />
[[File:Evan'sDeath.JPG|thumb|On '''25 February''', Chris murders [[Evan]] and the rest of the [[Asperpedia]] Four in brutal and disgusting ways.]]<br />
<br />
As January became February, Chris found himself embroiled in a series of phone calls from ''[[Asperchu]]'' creator Alec Benson Leary, where Alec demanded that Chris promise to be more tolerant of ''Asperchu'' and to get rid of [[Simonla Rosechu]], with [[Mao]] holding the [[CWCipedia]] hostage. Though Chris gradually recovered enough from the stress to complete ''Sonichu'' #10, which showed the death of Simonla, Chris then had [[Alec]], [[Mao]] and two other people killed within the same comic as an act of childish retaliation. Chris recovered just in time for his birthday, producing a shameless display of self-praising by declaring the first annual [[Christian Love Day]]. Perhaps the biggest mystery revealed this month was the sudden appearance of [[Magical Man Potion|another human male]] entering Chris's [[room]], one of the more puzzling developments to come out of Chris for some time.<br />
<br />
==March==<br />
{{main|March 2010}}<br />
[[File:Owllevel.jpg|thumb|left|On '''9 March''', Chris uploads a new ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' level that would inadvertendly reveal the identity of [[The Wallflower]].]]<br />
<br />
As March began, trolls showed concern over news that Chris's father, [[Bob]], had been hospitalized with congestive heart failure. Sadly, Chris showed no concern whatsoever, angering his [[fanbase]]. A few days later, Chris would, through his massive [[ego|narcissism]], reveal a name of his potential new [[sweetheart]] through a custom ''[[Little Big Planet|LBP]]'' level. Dedicated trolls would discover [[The Wallflower|her identity]], and one faggot would cause the [[gal-pal]] to cut ties with Chris and Chris himself discovering the [[CWCki]]. At that point, Chris began an all-out war against the [[Internet]], attacking his [[fans]] for wanting more ''Sonichu'' pages, attacking the CWCki, and especially attacking [[Surfshack Tito]], the troll who took credit for destroying the [[lulz]]. However, [[Rocky Shoemaker|an outside source]] would intervene, forcing Chris to once again announce he was leaving the Internet forever. (36 hours after making this bold and bombastic claim, Chris returned with a new video to complain about [[TV]] and [[sex]].)<br />
<br />
==April==<br />
{{main|April 2010}}<br />
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|On '''5 April''', Chris's second [[The Hook Cafe]] ad is discovered.]]<br />
<br />
As April started, Chris's activity on the Internet was sporadic. However, trolls soon discovered an ad on [[The Hook Cafe]], discovering that Chris was back to his [[Love Quest]] on the Internet. During this time, Chris would meet and begin talking to a woman named [[Jackie]], who would become Chris's focus throughout the month. Having learned something from the previous incidents, Chris kept a low profile on her, which however did not prevent some highly-disturbing material to eventually leak to general public. During this time, he attempted to return to [[The GAMe PLACe]] in an attempt to lift his ban; the trolls hailed [[Michael Snyder]] as a hero when he kicked the anti-Semitic manchild out again. Chris would also work on CWCipedia a bit more, creating profiles for his characters and a page about all of his past sweethearts.<br />
<br />
==May==<br />
{{main|May 2010}}<br />
[[File:MODNATION_2.JPG|thumb|left|On '''May 26''', Chris begs for ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' bonuses.]]<br />
<br />
As May started, it seemed that things were going to be slow again, with a relative high point of smug Chris boasting that he had removed a "bug" allegedly planted by trolls in the [[PS3|life upgrade]]. However, he soon became severely depressed and blamed his problems of rejection by everyone on a conspiracy conceived against him by the [[Greene County]] School Board. By the end of the month, Mao opened up the [[CWCipedia]] to everyone. Chris attempted to revert their vandalism, but soon gave into stress and abandoned the website. Two series of [[e-mails]] are also leaked.<br />
<br />
==June==<br />
{{main|June 2010}}<br />
[[File:GrayScaleChris.jpg|thumb|On '''30 June''', Chris looks for [[love]] on [[Flipnote Hatena]].]]<br />
<br />
After Chris's fourth threat to leave the Internet, many fully expected that he would not keep to his word. The silence was however broken after Chris traveled to The GAMe PLACe with an autistic plan of revenge against Michael Snyder; long story short, Chris almost committed [[Son-Chu|vehicular]] homicide while [[Alcohol|drunk]] and was let off scot-free by the [[police]]. He then made a video addressing these events, and announced that he would be leaving the Internet. ([[Chris and hypocrisy|Again]]. [[Youtube Finale|For]] [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|the]] [[100 2188|fifth]] [[100 2189|time]].) Things fell silent for nearly two weeks, until a field agent spotted Chris at the [[Fridays After Five]] event in [[Charlottesville]], continuing his [[Love Quest]] offline by acting [[pedofork|really creepy]] in public. Soon, trolls also discovered where Chris had disappeared to online: the [[Flipnote Hatena]], a website created by [[Nintendo]] for users to share their amateur animations.<br />
<br />
==July==<br />
{{main|July 2010}}<br />
[[Image:FAF-06092010.jpg|thumb|left|On '''9 July''', Chris continues stalking girls at [[Fridays After Five]].]]<br />
<br />
July 2010 was another very quiet month. It began with Chris getting [[List_of places that have banned Chris|permabanned]] from [[Flipnote Hatena]] for constantly breaking the site's rules. For a time after that he emerged from the internets to enjoy the fruits of real life... by reverting back to the ancient ways of the [[attraction sign]]. He was spotted once at [[McIntire Park]] and twice at [[Fridays After Five]]. However, on 17 July he returned to [[Twitter]], telling [[trolls|his loyal fans]] that he's [[lie|working on the comic pages]]. On 24 July he also evaded his Flipnote Hatena ban and re-posted some of his removed flipnotes, suggesting that he bought another DSi just to use a children's website as his personal dating service.<br />
<br />
==August==<br />
<br />
{{main|August 2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:PostCar.JPG|thumb|On '''29 August''', the [[life upgrade]] goes GAME OVER, man.]]<br />
<br />
During the first half of August, Chris didn't give off any signs of life except for a brief sighting at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]], kicking a stall of [[HEXBox]] games. It was suspected he spent his time playing [[video games]]. However, a phone call to Bob Chandler was released, relieving some new info. He would then return on August 27 to post two videos, one concerning his upcoming high school reunion, and the other where Chris concedes to the trolls after reformatting his PS3, claiming [[fail|he did himself in]]. Two days later, Chris would destroy his PS3, and there was much rejoicing.<br />
<br />
==September==<br />
<br />
{{main|September 2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:Niggocwc.jpg|thumb|left|On '''16 September''', Chris dressed as a [[niggo]].]]<br />
<br />
Early in September, e-mail correspondence was leaked that provided some background on the destruction of the [[Ps3|life upgrade]]. Quite predictably, Chris purchased another PS3 almost immediately. [[Jackie]] officially returned as a new [[sweetheart]] in Chris's life, with him trying to impress through new videos on YouTube, including attacks at Jackie's ex-boyfriend, Lars. Also this month, a bunch of ancient documents dating back from 2008 and 2009 were released to the public by [[Clyde Cash]], followed by some more from early 2010, including [[Wallflower_E-mails|correspondence between Chris and The Wallflower]]. Towards the end of the month, Chris officially kicked off his "anti-troll movement".<br />
<br />
==October==<br />
<br />
{{main|October 2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:Grimace.jpg|thumb|On '''4 October''', Chris [[cosplay]]s as [[McDonalds|the Grimace.]]]]<br />
<br />
October began with Chris acting just as crazy as in September, if not crazier. He made another half-assed apology to Michael Snyder and then proceeded to start dressing up in a large variety of [[cosplay|costumes]] made out of construction paper, which dominated the first half of the month. He also made two scary and confusing videos in which he gave birth to a baby [[bear]], used his manboobs for a breast cancer awareness ad, and more. Some of the videos were actually shot outside of the [[room]] or even the [[house]] altogether, featuring Chris driving his mom's car and even going for a "hike". The conflict with Lars also continued, however on seemingly low-level. October 2010 is notable of sheer number of [[videos]] that were released by Chris, including more than a dozen a day twice, making it by far the most active month so far (albeit quality of them varied a lot). In the meantime, Clyde kept releasing even more previously unseen historical documents.<br />
<br />
==November==<br />
{{main|November 2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|left|On '''6 November''', a video of Chris struggling to do pull-ups was leaked.]]<br />
<br />
November turned out to be a slow month. Chris had a call with Lars and a video of him failing to do pull-ups was leaked the same day. Chris would then go quiet for two weeks, until he quit the Internet for the 6th time on 22 November and deleting most of his other [[YouTube]] videos in the progress.<br />
<br />
==December==<br />
{{main|December 2010}}<br />
<br />
December began under the shadow of Chris's sixth attempt to leave the Internet in favor of playing [[vidya]] all the time. The final batch of e-mails between Chris and Jackie were released. As usual, Chris did not get [[All I Want For Christmas Is a Pretty Girlfriend| a girlfriend for Christmas]], for the sixth time since [[2004]]. {{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Video summary==<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The Chris Chan 2010 Year in Review<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ugFEQ9gYmq0}}<br />
| stardate = 28 [[December 2010]]<br />
| maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/MiHiVidz MiHiVidz]<br />
| subject = [[Chris]]<br />
| type = Compilation<br />
}}<br />
<br />
{{Timeline}}<br />
[[Category:Chronology]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Autism&diff=134514Autism2011-02-15T19:03:12Z<p>CaseHa: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{quote|I'm POSSIBLY [[retarded]]...|Chris on his autism, [[Mumble]] chat 23 February 2009}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|I'M RETARDED|Chris, [[CWC - Exposing Jeff]]}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|It sometimes takes me a long while before I can fully comprehend and make an appropriate reaction. In another word, '''I am Sometimes Retarded'''.|Chris, on himself.<ref>6th paragraph down: http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality</ref>}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:086-BionicFlag.jpg|thumb|[[Bionic the Hedgehog]] "conquering" autism (and "ATcI3") by confusing windmills with watermills.]]<br />
[[Image:461-AutismFight.jpg|thumb|Chris at war with autism (or "ATSIMU") in [[China]]. Too bad you can't fight cannons with [[fangs]].]]<br />
[[Image:Autismcard.jpg|thumb|He plays this card a lot.]]<br />
<br />
'''Autism''' is a spectrum of neurological disorders involving the impairment of social interaction and communication. The cause of autism is unknown, but has been shown to have multiple genetic factors. The symptoms usually manifest before the age of 3 and are generally irreversible; there is no cure, although the condition can be treated. Autistic individuals are generally not retarded — they mostly have average intelligence — although obviously severe social impairment can coincide with stunted learning and development. [[Asperger syndrome]] is generally considered part of the autistic spectrum; individuals with Asperger syndrome generally have above-average intelligence, although they still suffer from the social and communicative impairments. Prognosis depends on the severity of the autism and the effectiveness of its treatment; autistic people may learn to live relatively normal, productive lives or they may have become so unable to function in society that they must be institutionalized.<br />
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[[Christian Weston Chandler]] has built much of his identity around being autistic. His terror of being associated with severely autistic/retarded people causes him to be overly eager to prove his basic competence and cite his success in primary and secondary education. At the same time, his pride from accomplishing these things in spite of his disability has conditioned him to demand outrageous praise for his slightest efforts and infinite patience for his gravest errors. Moreover, Chris's belief that the entire Greene County Board of Education continues to irrationally persecute him for his autism has left him suspicious of opposing points of view and resolute that anti-autistic prejudice is the reason for any of his setbacks. In short, it is impossible to understand Chris's [[Chris and anger|defensiveness]], [[stress|hypersensitivity]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissism]], [[Chris and remorse|irresponsibility]], [[Man in the Pickle Suit|paranoia]], [[100 2178|victimhood]], and [[Story of My Current Days|self-pity]] without understanding his relationship with autism.<br />
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Chris, in typical Chris fashion, not only seems to think that having autism imbues him with a [[Chris and his ego|special significance]], but also seems to think that his autism is different from that of every other person in the world who has autism. Because, y'know, everything to do with Chris has to be [[slow-in-the-minds|special]]. Because he's autistic, Chris is, naturally, better than everyone else (because having autism automatically makes him a genius), and everyone should acknowledge how utterly brilliant he is. At the same time, Chris is not responsible for anything he ever does wrong, because he is autistic and that means it's not his fault if he [[Twin Falling Towers|does]] [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|stupid]] [[Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_Out_of_College|things]].<br />
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==High-functioning vs. low-functioning==<br />
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Informally, autism may be subdivided into separate classifications based on the intelligence and degree of function the autistic individual possesses; i.e., high-functioning, medium-functioning, and low-functioning. Chris has latched onto this concept and will frequently qualify his condition, saying he has '''high-functioning autism''', or '''HFA'''. Generally, HFA is loosely defined as the ability to live in the mainstream world as opposed to being institutionalized, near-normal comprehension, fluent speech, and about-average intellect. This lets Chris have it both ways: you can't blame him for his failures because he has autism, but you can't treat him like he's retarded because he's ''high-functioning'' and therefore, nearly normal. <br />
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[[Trolls]] have often noted that the "high-functioning" qualifier is '''not''' a clinical diagnosis and is '''not''' recognized by the [[Wikipedia:DSM-IV|DSM-IV-TR]] or the [[Wikipedia:ICD-10|ICD-10]]. This usually goes hand-in-hand with questioning the severity and/or diagnosis of Chris's impairment, if not outright calling him a [[lie|liar]]. However, the Chandlers didn't make the "HFA" label up, and compared to kids who can barely speak and just walk in circles all day, Chris is relatively close to neurotypical. Semantics aside, though, even the most casual of observers would conclude that Chris is basically non-functioning.<br />
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Disgustingly, but perhaps not surprisingly, Chris detests [[Slow-in-the-minds|low-functioning autistics]] in the [[Chris and hypocrisy|exact manner]] that he fears normal people will detest him. In [[Mailbag 25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]], he compares those with low-functioning autism with those who suffer from severe retardation or severe brain damage, thinking that they would have their arms linked together, have deformations, be confined to wheelchairs or crutches and drool and grunt and growl. He has also compared them to "zombies".<ref>[[Mailbag_5#In which Chris speaks ill of the handicapped|Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_11#Elevators are important for the handicapped, so they don't want any phobias|Mailbag 11]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]]</ref> In his [[Father Call|phone call to Matt Devoria]]. The irony of his resentment toward 'Low Functioning' Autistic people is that he has a severely autistic cousin, as revealed in the [[autism papers]]; this probably means that either Chris is not aware of his own relatives (very probable), or he has disowned members of his own family on the basis of them having the same medical condition that he has (albeit more severely affected by it), being the autism-nazi he is.<br />
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He explains that he refuses to date a girl with any form of autism because he fears that seeing them will make him think about what he might be like if he had anything other than high-functioning autism.{{cite}} Chris believes he can do much more than any low-functioning autistic could, even as he's living with [[Bob|his]] [[Barb|parents]], has never had a real girlfriend, and [[Dirty, crapped briefs|shits his pants]] on a semiregular basis.<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref><br />
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Despite all this, though, presuming Chris is autistic, he is high-functioning since he can talk. However, this also means that he has the same medical condition as [[Microsoft|Bill Gates]] and the creator of [[Pokémon]], yet he has failed to do anything with his life, hence proving that his vulgarity and failure are utterly his fault.<br />
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{{clear}}<br />
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==Onset and diagnosis of Chris's autism==<br />
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{{quote|No one GIVES A SHIT that you are autistic, they NEVER DID| [[Jackie E-mails 23|Jackie]]}}<br />
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|Now GodBearJesus can't get him to shut up.]]<br />
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Chris's version of how he developed autism is best explained in the [[Song of Christian]] video. There he explains how a [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]] locked him in a room filled with toys at around age 1 1/2. After bawwwing for hours, he emerged from his lair unable to talk (which implies that Chris could talk before this incident, and that would be in direct contradiction to Chris's own parents stating that he never spoke until around the age of seven); as Chris himself puts it, "God put the mute button on me." Most specialists claim that these symptoms of autism begin to show around that age anyway,<ref>[[wikipedia:Autism#Characteristics|Wikipedia: Autism Characteristics]]</ref> so even if the events of the story happened, the babysitter didn't cause the autism. It is far, far more likely that one or both of Chris's parents simply looked for anyone to blame for Chris's sudden loss of language development.<br />
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It is not currently clear how Chris came to be considered as "autistic," although Chris has claimed that his parents possess official documentation about this in a safe. When pressed to release this information, he provided a [[autism papers|2004 psychiatric evaluation]] that states Chris was diagnosed with autism when he was "around age five or six." However, there's no way to be sure if the evaluator simply wrote down Chris's responses to his questions or independently verified them. (For example, Chris might not remember his exact age when he was diagnosed, but you'd think his medical records could be more precise than "five or six.") By the time of the Chandlers' legal battle with Greene County, Chris's autism seemed to have become a universally accepted fact, but the details of how, when, and where Chris was diagnosed remain a mystery.<br />
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When recounting his childhood, Chris usually skips straight from the "evil babysitter" incident to age seven, so we know very little about what (if any) treatment he received during this crucial period of development. In a [[CWCipedia]] [[mailbag]], Chris claims that when he was young, his parents were told he would never be able to read, write or function on a normal level. He and his doctors have now upgraded his condition to "high-functioning," but apparently his incredibly abysmal upbringing has actually allowed it to progress to mid-functioning at best. However, his characteristics and development throughout his life may put him in the "Childhood Disintegrating Disorder" category, as he has become worse and worse over the years.<br />
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In his "Song of Christian" video, he explains that his mother took him to the toy department and coaxed him to read aloud the names of Go-Bots, and later [[Transformers]]. Chris says he began speaking again when he was seven— that is, in [[1989]], when the Transformers line was on its last legs and the Go-Bots line had long since vanished. This would seem to indicate that this form of "therapy" had to have gone on for several years before producing any results.<br />
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{{clear}}<br />
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==Persecution==<br />
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Chris attended [[Greene County Primary School]], apparently without incident, from age 5 until age 9. Problems arose for him in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], where he alleges that the faculty wanted to remove him from mainstream classrooms and send him to what he calls an institution. He also claims that the teachers at the school held him down and recorded his screams. Chris frequently cites this as evidence that the school was senselessly cruel towards him, for no reason apparent to him except an innate fear and distrust of autistic people. More probable, given Chris's ongoing behavioral issues, is that he forced the faculty to restrain him by refusing to restrain himself. There's no way to know if Greene Elementary treated Chris unfairly, but the incident does suspiciously resemble Chris's [[arrest]] in July 2005. The Chandlers sued to prevent the school board from removing Chris from mainstream education before ultimately relocating to Chesterfield County to continue Chris's mainstreaming there.<br />
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There's no way to know how much of Chris's attitude about the Greene County crisis is based on his personal recollections or what he was later told by his parents, who themselves seem unusually paranoid about the county's vendetta against their family. However, the result of the incident is clear: Chris emerged from adolescence firmly believing that many people not only misunderstand autistic people but hate and fear them. He seems to believe this prejudice is based not on a person's actions (e.g., throwing fits and irrationally screaming) but on a person's mere identification as autistic, regardless of function. Given Chris's fear of low-functioning autistics, he may in fact think this prejudice is perfectly justified, but wrongfully targeted at a high-functioning individual. Of course, in Chris's mind, he may as well be the only high-functioning autistic in the universe, so he is the one and only innocent victim in "everyone's favorite game, [[Kick the Autistic]]."<br />
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Chris's [[Chris and Rape|tactful and sensitive]] comments on a news story about a woman with [[Asperger Syndrome]] being raped revealed that he believes the media, like the rest of the world, has a bias against autism similar to [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missing_white_woman_syndrome "Missing White Woman Syndrome"], and that the story wouldn't have been reported if the victim was a woman with "proper" autism.<br />
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==Chris's symptoms==<br />
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Many [[troll]]s dispute the exact diagnosis of Chris's mental condition, on the basis that his observed behavior is inconsistent with various autistic people. CWC-related forums (and other forums, for that matter) have seen numerous testimonials about people who are undeniably autistic but nowhere near as fucked-up as Chris has turned out to be, and in general these forums do not consider Chris to be an example of what all autistic people are like. Quite often, autistics are indeed able to learn social skills to some small degree in the context of intellectual learning. Some can even come off as being completely neurotypical because they have come to realize that, while they believe "normal" behavior has a tenuous definition, they must adapt to others' expectations of what's acceptable if they wish to succeed in life. Chris, however, demonstrates a willful ignorance of normalcy, with a sense of entitlement coupled with an expectation that others should not only understand his ridiculous idiosyncrasies in the first place, but also accept them or even force [[Dating education|them]] upon others.<br />
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A layperson may come to the conclusion that Chris is not autistic, and he's just a regular (albeit idiotic) guy with a few "eccentricities" (more like psychotic), or jump to the other extreme and conclude that Chris has full-blown mental retardation. However, Chris's characteristics are most likely a combination of [[Barbara|bad parenting]] and genuine autism. The following are aspects of Chris's character that clearly match autistic tendencies:<br />
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[[Image:0695-AnnaBD9.JPG|thumb|right|Awkward body language, as Chris displays here, is a common trait of autism.]]<br />
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|left|Stacking objects is a common symptom of autism, and is often one of its first signs in a young child.]]<br />
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*Chris displays virtually no coherent, working theory of mind. This is the essence of autism: autistics have difficulty gauging others' internal, subjective thoughts, feelings, ideas, intents and so on; understanding that these might be different than their own; and predicting their behavior based on these differences. Indeed, the prefix "aut-" is a form of "auto-", meaning "self," as in "automobile," meaning "self-moving". In [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|an email between Clyde Cash and him]], he sent Clyde a link to [[The MovingFoward videos|a video he made of himself destroying his PS3]]. He destroyed his PS3 under the egregiously mistaken impression that he'd be given $9,001 for it, which is in itself an indicator of his fundamental inability to gauge others' actual intents and future behavior. He filmed himself doing it specifically to prove to Clyde, who wasn't present for the destruction, that it happened according to the video's objective portrayal. However, he added that if Clyde showed the video to anyone Chris didn't mean to see it without paying him the money, "it can be considered [Clyde's] Word Alone, possible Movie Editing and Actors, and NOT Fact" as though the video would have any less evidential weight on others if he denied to them what he rightfully claimed to Clyde that it showed with enough certitude that he would give him thousands of dollars because of its being shown.<br />
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*Chris places disproportional importance on literal statements, another trait of autism. This is related to the above. Chris acted as though he could convince others of a fact contrary to videographic evidence simply by stating it. Another example is virtually the entire [[Liquid Chris#Liquid Saga|Liquid saga]], where Chris honestly, fervently, pathetically tried to demonstrate what was already blatantly obvious to everyone: that his name is not Ian Brandon Anderson and that Liquid was not him. He seemed to believe strongly enough [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|to become visibly frustrated]] that others might believe Liquid's statements in the face of the obvious that he had to continually counteract those statements with his own as though just the statements were the most important or most effective means of proving what everyone already knew.<br />
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*Chris is extremely gullible. One need only see his extensive [[list of sweethearts]] to see just how easily fooled he is. In addition, not only has he been fooled by trolls pretending to be girls, he has fallen for trolls pretending to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] and approaching him about making a Sonichu game. A telling statement comes from the aforementioned email to Clyde: "even if you upload the video yourself, it '''can be''' considered YOUR Word Alone[.]" (''emphasis added'') Chris might operate on the assumption that if a thing ''can be'' true, it's always reasonable to behave as though it ''is'' true no matter how slight the chance and no matter how much more likely it is to be false.<br />
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*Chris lacks a conversational filter. He calls this [[Honest Content|honesty]]; normal people call it social retardation. Without provocation he will tell you about his pinkeye and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]], and how he is a [[virgin with rage]]. Only when his [[Barbara|mother]] told him to knock it off did he actually give up telling everyone he's a virgin.<br />
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*Chris can't show emotions well with facial expressions and body language. See [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters|his statement to the women of the world]] if you like having Chris haunt your dreams. His inability to display emotions on his face has been called a "[[The Creepy Stare|dead fish expression]]." When he does attempt to have an expression, it looks very cartoonish. He typically speaks in a monotone, and his attempts to sound expressive (see [[CWC's Message for Ivy]]) come off as creepy and unnatural.<br />
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*Chris has very poor facial and vocal recognition skills. [[Julie]] was a 13 year old boy using an obvious falsetto and Chris fell for it. In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|one chat]], the boy made no attempt to disguise his voice and Chris was none the wiser, disclosing personal sexual details. Two images of different people were used to represent [[Blanca Weiss]], and Chris didn't notice. In an [[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|AIM Chat]] with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], she sent him a link to pictures of Megan Fox, and Chris complimented her on them. It should be noted that the two have entirely different skin colors.<br />
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*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Chris lacks empathy]] and concern for others. See his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|plea]] to Clyde. His suggestion after the loss of [[Ryan Cash]] was "find yourself a girlfriend." He asks for ED to [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|please understand]] him, because he is an "innocent victim of misunderstanding"—he wants empathy from others, but he can't return the favor. Chris primarily sees other people in terms of what they can provide for him; when accused of overstepping his bounds or other wrongdoing, he has no concept of [[Chris and remorse|remorse or apology]] except as something he must do to continue receiving favors. When forced to apologize, he makes insincere apologies followed immediately by further demands.<br />
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*Chris has trouble developing relationships. Many neurotypical people have the same problem, but Chris is particularly inept at socializing. He has no filter on what he says and cannot empathize with others, key prerequisites for successfully interacting with people. He also pretty much just talks about himself.<br />
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*Chris thinks in absolutes and in terms of clearly defined steps in order to do something. He thinks there must be sex on or by the [[third date]]. He describes his sadness in terms of his [[heart level]] and briefly mentioned a [[Scale of Respect]]. He feels that if he just knows the correct steps to getting a [[sweetheart]], he will be able to find one easily. His [[dating education|crash-course in dating]] and [[Dating|suggestions to Blanca]] assume that a relationship should follow a rigidly predetermined progression instead of a natural flow.<br />
**In the [[Jackie E-mails 23|final exchange of e-mails with Jackie,]] Chris responded to Jackie's frank descriptions of his habits and lifestyle by telling her she had exceeded the "Hurtful Truth Level"; While he knows he should be appreciative of hearing the truth about himself, this was the only way he could wrap his brain around the abstract idea enough to be able to tell her he thought she'd gone too far.<br />
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*Chris tends to use solipsistic neologisms; that is, he creates new words that only he himself understands and expects other people to comprehend them. Many articles on this very wiki have been written to explain the resulting [[CWC-isms]].<br />
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*Chris exhibits compulsive and repetitive behavior. He wears the same [[shirt]] for days at a time, and uses the same terms and [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|exact]] [[boyfriend-free girl|phrases]] [[sweetheart from the ground-up|frequently]]. He feels the need to refer to people by their full names, plainly visible when he talks about himself, [[Clyde Cash]], or [[Adam Stackhouse]].<br />
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*Chris has an extremely narrow range of interests. He seems to only give a damn about video games, prowling for his next [[sweetheart]], his initials, and [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], so much to the point where he practically places [[Sonichu (character)|him]] somewhere in everything he creates. He often wishes to [[dating|combine]] two [[LBP#First Date Level|interests]].<br />
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*Although he does not demonstrate any [[Honor Roll|competency]] with them, Chris has a fixation on numbers and statistics that would generally be irrelevant to others. He describes measures in concrete terms (e.g. "5 mies[sic] from the city"<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_0/Page_2</ref> instead of "outside the city"), and has a particular obsession with times and dates, timestamping nearly every scene in the comic and giving his characters birthdays that have no relevance to the plot (unless it becomes convenient to "[[pedofork|age up]]" the characters). Needless to say, Chris's tendency to blurt out exact dates and times (assuming he's not lying off his ass) has made the job of [[CWChronology|CWCki chronologists]] much easier. On the other hand, his haphazard treatment of dates and times in the comic has led to countless [[continuity#Chronology|continuity errors]].<br />
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*Chris's given reasons for his love of [[My Little Pony]] are also indicative of autism. Autistics are drawn to physical sensations which give them a feeling of being 'grounded', and this is probably why Chris finds stroking the hair of these toys so "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|therapeutic]]".<br />
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*Chris lacks social awareness. One notable instance, as revealed in the [[autism papers]], was when two [[Niggos|African American]] ladies were speaking to Chris about his love quest, when Chris politely told them that they could not be his girlfriend because they were not white. Based on the report of the examiner, Chris believed he was merely informing the ladies as to his prerequisites for a potential sweetheart while oblivious to the fact he was being racially insensitive.<ref>[[Autism_papers#IDENTIFYING_STATEMENT:]]</ref><br />
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*Unnatural relationships with objects are also a sign of autism; Chris has an evident obsessions with his [[medallion]], his [[PS3]], and any number of other items that clutter up his [[Chris's room|room]]. Since autistic people have difficulty maintaining relationships with people they often end up becoming emotionally dependent on objects.<br />
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*Chris also appears to have echolalia, a common symptom of autism. This means that he constantly repeats phrases from his favorite television shows, movies and video games, regardless of whether they fit the current situation.<br />
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==Chris's misconceptions about autism==<br />
It's not clear that Chris has any understanding of what, precisely, autism is, except that a) he has it, b) it's a bad thing, and c) he's a brave little boy for living with it. His song [[A-U-T-I-S-M]] sums up his attitudes about the disorder:<br />
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{{quote|A-U-T-I-S-M: what does it mean? Silence and friends unseen! A few brains as well: that is autism! And that makes us seem special to you!|Chris, attempting to spell out autism in more ways than one}}<br />
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To Chris, that's all it is — a condition that makes you a bit smarter than normal and mysteriously makes people not want to be your friend.<br />
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Chris also seems to only be aware of the symptoms of autism that fit in with his odd, pseudo-Bohemian lifestyle. Asexuality is very common in autistic people; this is because any form of romance or sex is too intimate for an autistic mind to cope with. This completely contradicts Chris's "[[Love Quest]]" and suggests that he is actually trying to compensate for his inability to feel true sexual attraction, even if that means becoming a genuinely disturbing pervert.<br />
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Chris [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|considers himself to have "Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People",]] suggesting that he believes [[Chris and his Ego|the disorder did not even exist before he was born]].<br />
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In a [[May 2010]] [[Some Favored Comedians|video]], he opined that our society is spending so much time on the internet that ''everyone'' is becoming autistic.<ref>[[Toucher and Rich Segment#Chris's Response|Chris responds to Toucher and Rich, May 2009]]</ref><ref>[[Some Favored Comedians]]</ref> This further proves that people with no social contact should not attempt social commentary. Well, that and Chris has no fucking clue what his own disorder is actually ''like''. More recently he tried to use this excuse to guilt trip [[Jackie]] into being sorry for yelling at him, which worked as well as you'd expect.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref><br />
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===Chris on the causes of autism===<br />
There's a broad scientific consensus that autism largely arises from genetic factors. Chris's own case is consistent with the theory that children born to older parents (Bob and Barb were 54 and 40, respectively, when Chris was conceived) are at greater risk of developing autism.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_autism#Genetics</ref><br />
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Chris's own expressed views on the root causes of autism are all over the map. He's espoused a few different theories at different times and in different situations. His oldest theory, dating back to the [[Song of Christian]] in the late 1990s, is that the [[abusive babysitter]] was responsible for his condition. In more recent years (specifically, during [[Mumble 3|his arguments with]] [[Clyde Cash]] in early 2009, he said that "scientifically speaking, [autism] has possibly come from a drug, or otherwise it may possibly be genetic", and that the babysitter incident merely "brought out the, uh, curse that was buried within me." <br />
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When explaining his condition to [[Father Call|Matt Devoria]] late in the fall of 2009, Chris insisted that autism has no genetic factors. In that instance, however he had an obvious agenda. He hoped to convince Matt that any children he fathered on Matt's daughter [[Kacey]] wouldn't wind up inheriting his condition; because of this, it's difficult to say exactly how sincere he happened to be at that moment.<br />
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To muddle the issue even ''further'', in [[Mailbag 12]], Chris blamed the cause of autism on a shot "the doctor's optionally give to the child after birth", apparently in reference to the highly disputed urban myth alleging that childhood vaccinations lead to autism. It's not likely that Chris even has that much of an awareness of the facts and assertions of said myth, and was probably looking for a throwaway excuse to deny any hereditary factors.<br />
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===Chris versus Asperger syndrome===<br />
{{see also|Asperger syndrome}}<br />
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Chris is easily outraged by any attempt to associate or confuse autism, high-functioning or otherwise, with Asperger syndrome, a similar condition now considered by many experts to overlap with HFA on the autistic spectrum. (In fact, it has been proposed that Asperger syndrome be placed on the autism spectrum in the new DSM-V, making both the condition and "high-functioning autism" one and the same.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DSM-V#Asperger_syndrome</ref>) At times, Chris has stated that he dislikes Asperger syndrome because sufferers of the disorder supposedly steal sympathy away from autism awareness. He has also claimed that the name is too close to "ass burger" or "ass booger" for his taste. In the early days of the CWCipedia Mailbag, asking Chris about Asperger syndrome was the most effective way to troll him; this culminated in the creation of [[Asperchu]]. <br />
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In the present, Chris simply hates Asperger syndrome because it reminds him of how angry he got the last time someone brought it up - in other words, a completely unjustifiable opinion. Chris has declared himself "close-minded" on the subject, dismissing all scientific opinion contrary to his own, and angrily refuses to be convinced that he does not occupy a superior tier of social retardation.<br />
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==Chris on autism education==<br />
Chris is a firm believer in mainstream education for children with autism, a trait he doubtlessly picked up from his parents, who went to [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|incredible lengths]] to keep him in mainstream classrooms throughout his school years. Aside from speech therapy lessons intended to help him recover from his period of muteness as a child, as far as the available records indicate, Chris has never received any sort of special education geared towards dealing with his autism or related issues.<br />
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[[Mailbag 12|When asked for his advice on how to raise an autistic child]], Chris replied "...Most Importantly, MAINSTREAM; let your child be free to communicate and associate with the Normal Society. Special Education is okay, but that will not do in the longest run." Later, [[Mailbag 15|for advice on how "to succeed despite being afflicted with Asperger's"]], Chris's only response was, "My advice is to Mainstream the child."<br />
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During a [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|video from April 2010]], Chris read off a lengthy printout of autism-related information. After quoting a passage about how the education of autistic children should be undertaken by trained professionals in specialized settings, Chris offered his own opinion.<br />
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{{quote|As for me though, I highly recommend mainstreaming, lettin' 'em go though normal life. I mean yeah, give 'em the special treatment while they're young... but when you get 'em in elementary or middle school... or high school, mainstream is the way to go.|Chris, [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]}}<br />
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In short, Chris believes that the approach that produced the man as we know him today (i.e. ignoring the problem) is [[List of Chris's lies|the best possible way to raise and educate children with autism.]]<br />
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==Autism cured?==<br />
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[[Image:454-CWCsPossibleFuture.JPG|thumb|Autism appears to be in Chris's future...]]<br />
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Chris's greatest dream is that his autism might one day be cured (although in 2006 he would have unhesitatingly sacrificed such a cure in order to obtain a [[PS3|PlayStation 3]]). There are instances of children inexplicably recovering from the symptoms, but there is no known cure for autism that can simply be applied to everyone like Chris's "homo vaccine." Imagine the surprise of the mental health community, then, when Chris revealed in [[March 2009]] that he had overcome his autism once and for all:<ref>[[Sarah Reveals Herself]]</ref><br />
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:<font color="#4682B4">'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I'm not going to blame it on my autism; I have realized that I am over that now.</font><br />
:<font color="#CD5555">'''Sarah May:''' Over what?</font><br />
:<font color="#CD5555">'''Sarah May:''' Over your autism?</font><br />
:<font color="#4682B4">'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' yes</font><br />
:<font color="#CD5555">'''Sarah May:''' . . .</font><br />
:<font color="#4682B4">'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' anyway, what is it that you want to do?</font><br />
:<font color="#CD5555">'''Sarah May:''' Christian</font><br />
:<font color="#CD5555">'''Sarah May:''' Are you serious?</font><br />
:<font color="#CD5555">'''Sarah May:''' Autism is not influenza</font><br />
:<font color="#CD5555">'''Sarah May:''' You don't 'get over it'</font><br />
:<font color="#4682B4">'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I've broken out of my autistic shell, and I am better able to socialize in public, with the past practices online.</font><br />
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Chris claims during the same chat that he may not be making sense due to a virus, easily allowing for him to retract this. Fortunately, Chris has discovered that [[stress]] is a more socially popular scapegoat for his personal shortcomings. Of course, people learn to manage stress, but what do you expect?<br />
<br />
As of [[May 2009]], Chris seems to have regained his autism and is back to [[Chris on Wikipedia|blaming it]] for all his problems, seemingly believing that autism is as easy to shake/regain as the common flu. Or he forgot that he even had the above conversation and is just retarded.<br />
<br />
[[November 2009]] saw Chris claiming to have cured his autism again as stated at the end of part 2 on his [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] presentations (where he describes himself as a "high-functioning autistic ''recovered''"). A [[December 2009|month later]], Chris says in the [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|revised ED article]] in response to ED's claim he's "suffering" from autism, he comments "''which I still am for real.''"<br />
<br />
Chris's flip-flopping self-diagnosis simply illustrates his misunderstanding of his problems. Since autism is his scapegoat for when he fucks up, to him that's really all it is — a disease that makes people fuck up all the time. Therefore, when he fails he has a bad case of autism, and when everything is going well (such as when he believes he has a girlfriend) he thinks the autism has gone away. What Chris really wants, then, is not a cure for autism but to live a life in which nothing happens that he would need to blame on his autism; that is, a life in which he has a girlfriend and nobody criticizes him.<br />
<br />
==Things Chris has not blamed on his autism==<br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|What did you expect?]]<br />
<br />
==Chris and other autistics==<br />
<br />
Listening to Chris go on about "us TRUE and HONEST autistics", you might think he has some kind of misplaced sense of autistic solidarity. But this would merely be dumb, and Chris-chan always shoots for both dumb and repugnant, so in reality he doesn't give a shit about anyone's autism but his own. He calls lower-functioning autistics than himself "windows onto hell" and regards them with [[Chris and Hypocrisy|exactly the same kind of fear and mistrust he bitches about people treating him with]]. He has also expressed a disdain for others with high-functioning autism, with HFA being one of the characteristics excluding a woman from being a [[attraction sign|potential sweetheart]]. Meanwhile, he looks at people with [[Asperger Syndrome]], who are on roughly the same part of the spectrum as him, as dirty whores trying to somehow steal the limelight from "real" autistics (read: Chris).<br />
<br />
Chris has only once included another autistic person in his comics. In emails with [[Sarah Jackson]], she told Chris that her sister was also a high-functioning autistic. When Sarah was included in [[Episode_19#Episode_19:_Date_Ed_.28Even_Though_the_Idea_Sounds_Dated.29|Episode 19]], so was her sister, [[Rita]]. When Rita was given dialogue after Sarah's [[death]], what she said made so little sense grammatically (even for [[Chris and writing|Chris's standards]]) that it is hard to see it as unintentional. It can be speculated from this that Chris, thinking his own autism so much better than anyone else's, was attempting to make Rita seem very unintelligent as he assumes other autistics and people with mental disorders are. <br />
<br />
For their part, people with autism universally facepalm when they look at Chris, and wish he'd fuck off and die and stop giving them a bad name. The deleted article about Chris on TV Tropes said it best: they wish he'd Stop Being Stereotypical and embodying the worst perceptions of their condition. The article also noted that to people with autism or Asperger's, Chris was "Paranoia Fuel", that is to say it scares them to think they're like him. For the actual high-functioning autistics out there, Chris himself is the "window onto hell".<br />
<br />
The Aspies for Freedom website has had a couple of run-ins with Chris that nicely demonstrate how other autistics regard him:<br />
<br />
* [http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=14371 Aspies For Freedom thread] where Chris or someone impersonating Chris asks for help against [[ED]]. The aspies offer the usual advice of ignoring the [[trolls]], which by the way is the best advice.<br />
<br />
* [http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=15676 Aspies For Freedom thread] where someone asks about Chris, but everyone else just wants to avoid the drama. A few of them realize that what ED says is true even though it may be a "hate site". Apparently, previous drama involving Chris led them to disable registration.<br />
<br />
Tl;dr: Chris has no support in the online autistic community unless it's from someone who would rather he commit suicide.<br />
<br />
==Sauce==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[Asperger syndrome]]<br />
* [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]<br />
* [[A-U-T-I-S-M]]<br />
* [[Chris and psychology]]<br />
* [[Kick the Autistic]]<br />
* [[Slow-in-the-minds]]<br />
* [[Stress]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ix5Ith-fSU One Winged Autistic ]<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QdGOGV7WX0 The Tard-Man - Autistic Adventures - Director's Cut]<br />
*[http://www.autismuk.com/index9sub.htm Sexuality and Autism]<br />
<br />
{{CWC-isms}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Autistic Spectrum Disorders]]<br />
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Sailor_Moon&diff=134512Sailor Moon2011-02-15T18:48:17Z<p>CaseHa: /* Influence */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{taxpayermoney}} <br />
<br />
{{Quote|In the name of Christian Chandler's heart, I shall punish you!|[[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] to [[Mary Lee Walsh]].}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:SERASONICHU by neodalion.jpg|thumb|Pretty sailor-suited soldier!]]<br />
<br />
'''''Sailor Moon''''' (full name: '''''Pretty Soldier Sailor Moon''''') is an [[anime]] that [[Chris]] became interested in after discovering that his [[gal pal]] [[Megan Schroeder]] enjoyed the series. In typical [[retard]] fashion, Chris then began to rip off things from the series in a desperate attempt to impress her enough to make her want to bob up and down on his [[duck]]. <br />
<br />
==Influence==<br />
[[Image:Sailor Moon straight.jpg|thumb|''Sailor Moon'' also helps Chris [[homos|STAY STRAIGHT]].]]<br />
[[Image:324-SailorMoonBetweenFriends.jpg|thumb|[[Scrapbook]] image.]]<br />
''Sailor Moon'''s influence can clearly be seen in his artwork from around issue four of ''[[Sonichu]]''. He began drawing his character with big, shiny animu eyes around this time, as well as creating the character of [[Sailor Megtune]], which is nothing more than Megan dressed in [[Wikipedia:Japanese_school uniform#Sailor outfit|sailor fuku]]. [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(sister)|Crystal]] also wears a sailor fuku in her transformed state.<br />
<br />
Additionally, around [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]], Chris starts referring to himself as the "Warrior of Love and Honesty", much in the vein of Sailor Moon's own post-transformation speech, which he also rips off with the line "I will punish you!" <br />
<br />
Chris's transformation into [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] also is more reminiscent of the transformation sequences in ''Sailor Moon'', in that they focus on individual aspects of the transformation itself, and usually require an item. This was not lost upon the [[Vivian|creators]] of the [[Audiobooks|audiobooks]], in which the ''Sailor Moon'' theme served as the background music to the transformation scenes.<br />
<br />
[[Wes-Li]] attacks with a flame sniper, [[Wikipedia:Sailor Mars|Sailor Mars]] has the same attack with the exact same name. <br />
<br />
Chris believes that staring nightly at [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|a poster]] featuring Sailor Moon and Sailor Chibi Moon will banish [[homos|homosexual]] urges<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate February 6th, 2009]]</ref>, but the whole premise of Chris enjoying ''Sailor Moon'' is highly ironic considering the show is renowned for having many [[Bionic|gay]], [[Megagi|lesbian]], and [[Silvana|transsexual]] characters. It also doesn't help Chris's image that [[Pedofork|the two characters both happen to be fourteen and six years old]], respectively.<br />
<br />
Occasionally, he will also give a reference to the show in [[Captain's Log]]s.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 30th, 2009]]</ref><br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[Anime]]<br />
* [[Card_games#Sailor_Moon_TCG|''Sailor Moon TCG'']]<br />
* [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|''Sailor Moon'' Poster of Fail]]<br />
* [[Sailor Megtune]]<br />
* [[Patti-Chan]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [[Wikipedia:Sailor Moon|''Sailor Moon'']] at [[Wikipedia]].<br />
<br />
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]<br />
[[Category:Television shows]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Wes_Iseli&diff=134510Wes Iseli2011-02-15T18:44:12Z<p>CaseHa: /* Wes-Li Sonichu */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:WesIseli2.jpg|thumb|Wes Iseli]]<br />
{{quote|Wes is a magician and regretfully, [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarah's]] boyfriend. Because of this, Christian is very jealous and dislikes him much.|[[:Image:291-ACWesBck.jpg|Wes Iseli ''Animal Crossing'' card]]}} <br />
'''Wes Iseli''' (pronounced [wɛs ˈaɪzli])<ref>[[Mumble 4]], around 22 minutes in</ref> [[Emily|briefly dated]] Sarah Hammer, Chris's long-time [[gal pal|female friend]]. Wes is a magician in real life (available for birthdays, weddings, funerals and bar mitzvahs) and is currently married to another woman.<br />
<br />
Although trolls have been trying to contact Wes ever since they found his various online accounts, he hasn't offered any official statements on Chris-chan or his involvement in the comics. Apparently he doesn't feel the need to talk shit about some guy he barely knew just because he was jealous of Wes's relationship with an ex-girlfriend of his.<br />
<br />
==Wes Iseli in the comic==<br />
[[Image:Sonichu05-P12.jpg|right|thumb|WesLi Sonichu apparently grows to about 20 feet tall, does an Edward G. Robinson impression, and kidnaps Sarah Hammer in Sonichu #5]]<br />
Wes Iseli (later [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retconned]] as '''Walter Grisby''') is one of the chosen 3 of the [[Anchuent Prophecy]], alongside [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] and [[Sarah Hammer]]. He learned that he was the descendant of the Wasabi Clan, and must take revenge upon the Cherokee's descendant, Chris. Wes, knowing of Chris' jealousy, accepts. So the two fight, and Wes almost wins until Sarah appears and breaks up with him. He then unites with Chris and Sarah to defeat the Golem made by [[Mary Lee Walsh]].<br />
<br />
He appears again later to kidnap Sarah via magic at her wedding. Chris then beats Wes up Yu-gi-oh style, and Sarah thanks Chris.<br />
<br />
===Fictional character biography===<br />
In 2003 Wes Iseli was dating Sarah Hammer, and so he met her friend Christian Chandler. Christian was immediately jealous of Wes, and in a development that sure sounds plausible, Wes became equally fixated on Chris even though Chris had nothing he wanted. As Sarah and Wes's relationship progressed, they drifted away from Christian.<br />
<br />
Their paths would cross when [[Sonichu]] discovered the Anchuent Prophecy and Christian used his [[medallion]] to activate the anchuent powers of the Cherokee and Wasabi clans, which would be bestowed on the reincarnations of the Cherokee chief, his queen, and his Wasabi rival. Wes received a vision of what appeared to be a nine-year-old wearing a robe and wizard hat (presumably the Wasabi chief), explaining the powers of the Fireshock Pendant and imploring him to use it to seek revenge on Chris-Chan.<br />
<br />
[[File:WesIseliAsperchu.jpg|thumb|left|Suffice to say, Wes Iseli was much more badass in [[Asperchu]].]]<br />
<br />
Now possessing the memories of his past life, Wes-Li attacked Christian and Sonichu not only over their own bad blood but that of their past lives—specifically the Wasabis' desire to obtain the [[Cherokian crown]]. The two battled in their electric hedgehog forms, and as usual Christian was very nearly defeated until a third party arrived to save him; Saramah attacked Wes-Li to stop the fight and make peace between them.<br />
<br />
Saramah immediately broke up with Wes-Li upon seeing his cruelty toward her friend, which left Wes-Li unmotivated to battle Graduon. However, with some prompting from Chris-Chan he held up his end of the prophecy and Graduon was finally defeated. Wes-Li refused to look his fellow hedgehogs in the eye as Chris transported them back home from CWCville.<br />
<br />
Wes would continue to obsess over Sarah Hammer up to the day of her wedding to [[William Spicer]]. Using his Wes-Li form, he stormed the chapel to abduct Sarah, but Chris-Chan valiantly rescued her with help from [[Sailor Megtune]] and [[Megagi]].<br />
<br />
Iseli was briefly seen attending the conference of villains following Christian's disappearance into the [[Time Void|time void]].<br />
<br />
===Wes-Li Sonichu===<br />
[[File:FlameSnipers.jpg|thumb|right|Wes-li's Flame sniper (left) compared to Sailor Mars' Flame sniper (right).]]<br />
Wes-Li Sonichu (pronounced [wɛzlaɪ], "Wez-Lie", according to Chris's [[videobooks]], and as "Wesley" according to the [[Audiobooks]]) is the electric hedgehog Pokémon form of Wes Iseli when he is transformed by the Fireshock Pendant empowered by the [[Anchuent Prophecy]]. Although the prophecy foretold that Wes-Li, [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Chris-Chan]], and [[Saramah Rosechu|Saramah]] would work together to defeat [[Count Graduon]], Wes's spitefulness toward Chris and his bitterness at having been rejected by [[Sarah Hammer]] would lead him to use his powers for evil.<br />
<br />
Wes-li's attack is flame sniper, where he has a bow and arrow made from fire. The name and attack itself are another rip off from [[Sailor Moon]]. <br />
<br />
Prior to the retcon, Wes-Li was a passable pun. With the name change, it makes absolutely no sense that a person named "Walter Grisby" would have an alter ego that does not resemble his name in any way - unless one knows the background of this character.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<gallery><br />
Image:290-ACWes.jpg<br />
Image:291-ACWesBck.jpg<br />
Image:292-ACWesLi.jpg<br />
Image:293-ACWesLiBck.jpg<br />
Image:294-YuWesLi.jpg|Yu-Gi-OH SHIIII<br />
Image:295-WesLi.jpg|Flame on, bitch!<br />
Image:296-FireshockPendant.jpg|Fireshock Pendant<br />
Image:140-AJerk.jpg|Chris, ripping himself off.<br />
</gallery><br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [http://partymagic.50megs.com/ Old magic site]<br />
* [http://wesiseli.com/ New magic site]<br />
* [http://www.youtube.com/wesleyiseli YouTube account]<br />
* [http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1205570207 Facebook]<br />
<br />
{{Sonichu}}<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Iseli, Wes}}<br />
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]<br />
[[Category:Villains]]</div>CaseHahttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Wes_Iseli&diff=134509Wes Iseli2011-02-15T18:43:25Z<p>CaseHa: /* Wes Iseli in the comic */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:WesIseli2.jpg|thumb|Wes Iseli]]<br />
{{quote|Wes is a magician and regretfully, [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarah's]] boyfriend. Because of this, Christian is very jealous and dislikes him much.|[[:Image:291-ACWesBck.jpg|Wes Iseli ''Animal Crossing'' card]]}} <br />
'''Wes Iseli''' (pronounced [wɛs ˈaɪzli])<ref>[[Mumble 4]], around 22 minutes in</ref> [[Emily|briefly dated]] Sarah Hammer, Chris's long-time [[gal pal|female friend]]. Wes is a magician in real life (available for birthdays, weddings, funerals and bar mitzvahs) and is currently married to another woman.<br />
<br />
Although trolls have been trying to contact Wes ever since they found his various online accounts, he hasn't offered any official statements on Chris-chan or his involvement in the comics. Apparently he doesn't feel the need to talk shit about some guy he barely knew just because he was jealous of Wes's relationship with an ex-girlfriend of his.<br />
<br />
==Wes Iseli in the comic==<br />
[[Image:Sonichu05-P12.jpg|right|thumb|WesLi Sonichu apparently grows to about 20 feet tall, does an Edward G. Robinson impression, and kidnaps Sarah Hammer in Sonichu #5]]<br />
Wes Iseli (later [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retconned]] as '''Walter Grisby''') is one of the chosen 3 of the [[Anchuent Prophecy]], alongside [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] and [[Sarah Hammer]]. He learned that he was the descendant of the Wasabi Clan, and must take revenge upon the Cherokee's descendant, Chris. Wes, knowing of Chris' jealousy, accepts. So the two fight, and Wes almost wins until Sarah appears and breaks up with him. He then unites with Chris and Sarah to defeat the Golem made by [[Mary Lee Walsh]].<br />
<br />
He appears again later to kidnap Sarah via magic at her wedding. Chris then beats Wes up Yu-gi-oh style, and Sarah thanks Chris.<br />
<br />
===Fictional character biography===<br />
In 2003 Wes Iseli was dating Sarah Hammer, and so he met her friend Christian Chandler. Christian was immediately jealous of Wes, and in a development that sure sounds plausible, Wes became equally fixated on Chris even though Chris had nothing he wanted. As Sarah and Wes's relationship progressed, they drifted away from Christian.<br />
<br />
Their paths would cross when [[Sonichu]] discovered the Anchuent Prophecy and Christian used his [[medallion]] to activate the anchuent powers of the Cherokee and Wasabi clans, which would be bestowed on the reincarnations of the Cherokee chief, his queen, and his Wasabi rival. Wes received a vision of what appeared to be a nine-year-old wearing a robe and wizard hat (presumably the Wasabi chief), explaining the powers of the Fireshock Pendant and imploring him to use it to seek revenge on Chris-Chan.<br />
<br />
[[File:WesIseliAsperchu.jpg|thumb|left|Suffice to say, Wes Iseli was much more badass in [[Asperchu]].]]<br />
<br />
Now possessing the memories of his past life, Wes-Li attacked Christian and Sonichu not only over their own bad blood but that of their past lives—specifically the Wasabis' desire to obtain the [[Cherokian crown]]. The two battled in their electric hedgehog forms, and as usual Christian was very nearly defeated until a third party arrived to save him; Saramah attacked Wes-Li to stop the fight and make peace between them.<br />
<br />
Saramah immediately broke up with Wes-Li upon seeing his cruelty toward her friend, which left Wes-Li unmotivated to battle Graduon. However, with some prompting from Chris-Chan he held up his end of the prophecy and Graduon was finally defeated. Wes-Li refused to look his fellow hedgehogs in the eye as Chris transported them back home from CWCville.<br />
<br />
Wes would continue to obsess over Sarah Hammer up to the day of her wedding to [[William Spicer]]. Using his Wes-Li form, he stormed the chapel to abduct Sarah, but Chris-Chan valiantly rescued her with help from [[Sailor Megtune]] and [[Megagi]].<br />
<br />
Iseli was briefly seen attending the conference of villains following Christian's disappearance into the [[Time Void|time void]].<br />
<br />
===Wes-Li Sonichu===<br />
Wes-Li Sonichu (pronounced [wɛzlaɪ], "Wez-Lie", according to Chris's [[videobooks]], and as "Wesley" according to the [[Audiobooks]]) is the electric hedgehog Pokémon form of Wes Iseli when he is transformed by the Fireshock Pendant empowered by the [[Anchuent Prophecy]]. Although the prophecy foretold that Wes-Li, [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Chris-Chan]], and [[Saramah Rosechu|Saramah]] would work together to defeat [[Count Graduon]], Wes's spitefulness toward Chris and his bitterness at having been rejected by [[Sarah Hammer]] would lead him to use his powers for evil.<br />
[[File:FlameSnipers.jpg|thumb|right|Wes-li's Flame sniper (left) compared to Sailor Mars' Flame sniper (right).]]<br />
Wes-li's attack is flame sniper, where he has a bow and arrow made from fire. The name and attack itself are another rip off from [[Sailor Moon]]. <br />
<br />
Prior to the retcon, Wes-Li was a passable pun. With the name change, it makes absolutely no sense that a person named "Walter Grisby" would have an alter ego that does not resemble his name in any way - unless one knows the background of this character.<br />
<br />
==Gallery==<br />
<gallery><br />
Image:290-ACWes.jpg<br />
Image:291-ACWesBck.jpg<br />
Image:292-ACWesLi.jpg<br />
Image:293-ACWesLiBck.jpg<br />
Image:294-YuWesLi.jpg|Yu-Gi-OH SHIIII<br />
Image:295-WesLi.jpg|Flame on, bitch!<br />
Image:296-FireshockPendant.jpg|Fireshock Pendant<br />
Image:140-AJerk.jpg|Chris, ripping himself off.<br />
</gallery><br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [http://partymagic.50megs.com/ Old magic site]<br />
* [http://wesiseli.com/ New magic site]<br />
* [http://www.youtube.com/wesleyiseli YouTube account]<br />
* [http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1205570207 Facebook]<br />
<br />
{{Sonichu}}<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Iseli, Wes}}<br />
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]<br />
[[Category:Villains]]</div>CaseHa