Mailbag 7 - Revision history

Ray The Soda Guy: relevant link.

2023-08-05T16:59:27Z

relevant link.

← Older revision		Revision as of 12:59, 5 August 2023
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	===Love in two dimensions===		===Love in two dimensions===
	{{Email\|From: Brad Newman <peoplepeople91@hotmail.com>		{{Email\|From: Brad Newman <peoplepeople91@hotmail.com>
	Hello there, Christian Weston Chandler. I've read a lot of you and your real life adventures and found your struggle of getting a woman to be heart-breaking. No man should ever feel as lonely as you most likely do. That's why I come to you with a suggestion. Why not marry a 2D anime or video game character? With a little imagination (I'm sure you have a lot of it), they're about as good as a real girl. Trust me on this one. After trying and failing to find the woman that was right for me, I moved on to 2D love. IT'S AMAZING. 2D women will never betray you, never demand lavish gifts for sex, and never steal all of your shit when they inevitably divorce you. 2D women can't necessarily love you back, but your love for them should be enough to get by. Unless, of course, you're a selfish womanizer who always demands things in return. But, hey, with advances in artificial intelligence, she might just be able to!		Hello there, Christian Weston Chandler. I've read a lot of you and your real life adventures and found your struggle of getting a woman to be heart-breaking. No man should ever feel as lonely as you most likely do. That's why I come to you with a suggestion. Why [[Polyamorous marriage\|not marry a 2D]] anime or video game character? With a little imagination (I'm sure you have a lot of it), they're about as good as a real girl. Trust me on this one. After trying and failing to find the woman that was right for me, I moved on to 2D love. IT'S AMAZING. 2D women will never betray you, never demand lavish gifts for sex, and never steal all of your shit when they inevitably divorce you. 2D women can't necessarily love you back, but your love for them should be enough to get by. Unless, of course, you're a selfish womanizer who always demands things in return. But, hey, with advances in artificial intelligence, she might just be able to!

	So think it over, pick out your ideal 2D lover, and enjoy your new life of happiness!}}		So think it over, pick out your ideal 2D lover, and enjoy your new life of happiness!}}

Superspongebobbros at 18:20, 6 October 2020

2020-10-06T18:20:31Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 14:20, 6 October 2020
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	==Answered==		==Answered==
	===Good housekeeping===		===Good housekeeping===
	{{Email\|From: ~~[[Wikipedia:Jeffrey Dahmer~~\|Jeffrey Dahmer]] <youreinvitedfordinner@yahoo.com>		{{Email\|From: {{w\|\|Jeffrey Dahmer}} <youreinvitedfordinner@yahoo.com>
	Chris,		Chris,

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	===Yes you can sail the seven seas===		===Yes you can sail the seven seas===
	{{Email\|From: ~~[[Wikipedia:~~Starship Troopers\|sgtcharleszim]]@aol.com		{{Email\|From: {{w\|Starship Troopers\|sgtcharleszim}}@aol.com
	Mr. Chandler,		Mr. Chandler,

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	===GET A JOB, DUDE===		===GET A JOB, DUDE===
	{{Email\|From: ~~[[Wikipedia:Levi_Johnston~~\|Levi Johnston]] <hockey90@alaska.usa.com>		{{Email\|From: {{w\|Levi Johnston}} <hockey90@alaska.usa.com>
	Man, I've been trying hard to keep it together. It hurts man. We even had two kids together (one had Down Syndrome, a type of Autism) and she still left me. Her hot-shot family treats me like white trash.		Man, I've been trying hard to keep it together. It hurts man. We even had two kids together (one had Down Syndrome, a type of Autism) and she still left me. Her hot-shot family treats me like white trash.

Amanitie: /* An inkling that this is a joke letter */

2019-03-16T21:52:42Z

An inkling that this is a joke letter

← Older revision		Revision as of 17:52, 16 March 2019
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	===An inkling that this is a joke letter===		===An inkling that this is a joke letter===
	{{Email\|From: Cad Earnest <goldorthegold@yahoo.co.uk>		{{Email\|From: Cad Earnest <goldorthegold@yahoo.co.uk>
	Hello Chris, next March I am going to be involved in a stage play however my role requires me to gain a lot of weight in a short amount of time. I've checked some of your [[youtube]] videos a couple of months apart and you seem to have accomplished getting fat extremely qucikly. Could you provide me with hints or tips to get fat very quickly? This will be very important to my career as an actor so please tell me all you know about gaining weight.}}		Hello Chris, next March I am going to be involved in a stage play however my role requires me to gain a lot of weight in a short amount of time. I've checked some of your [[YouTube\|youtube]] videos a couple of months apart and you seem to have accomplished getting fat extremely qucikly. Could you provide me with hints or tips to get fat very quickly? This will be very important to my career as an actor so please tell me all you know about gaining weight.}}
	{{EmailReply\|Firstly, I feel offended of you saying that I "gain weight quickly"; I have been working out and [[Obesity\|LOSING WEIGHT]]. As much as I feel an inkling that this is a joke letter from a [[Troll]], my answer to your question is this... if you Truly want to gain weight quickly, then eat more fatty foods and don't exercise. :( --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu\|ChrisChanSonichu]] 05:59, 2 December 2009 (CET)}}		{{EmailReply\|Firstly, I feel offended of you saying that I "gain weight quickly"; I have been working out and [[Obesity\|LOSING WEIGHT]]. As much as I feel an inkling that this is a joke letter from a [[Troll]], my answer to your question is this... if you Truly want to gain weight quickly, then eat more fatty foods and don't exercise. :( --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu\|ChrisChanSonichu]] 05:59, 2 December 2009 (CET)}}

Asperhes at 19:31, 8 December 2015

2015-12-08T19:31:26Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 15:31, 8 December 2015
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	Uploaded on 29 [[November 2009]], '''Mailbag 7''' is the seventh batch of letters for [[Chris]] to answer/censor.		Uploaded on 29 [[November 2009]], '''Mailbag 7''' was the seventh batch of letters for [[Chris]] to answer/censor.

	This mailbag ~~contains~~ several encore appearances of people featured in previous mailbags, namely [[Mailbag 4#In which Chris is rude to a young girl\|the devout 14-year old girl]], aspiring artist [[Mailbag 2#This looks shopped\|Emmy Bardot]] and Alaskan-native Levi Johnston. There ~~are~~ a few ~~e-mails~~ carefully designed to gently bring up topics that Chris is in serious denial about, such as his [[obesity]]. There ~~are~~ also a few weird ones, like a Muslim boy's love of [[Sonichu]] ~~threatening his life~~, and some wacko promoting 2D love.		This mailbag contained several encore appearances of people featured in previous mailbags, namely [[Mailbag 4#In which Chris is rude to a young girl\|the devout 14-year old girl]], aspiring artist [[Mailbag 2#This looks shopped\|Emmy Bardot]], and Alaskan native Levi Johnston. There were a few emails carefully designed to gently bring up topics that Chris was in serious denial about, such as his [[obesity]]. There were also a few weird ones, like a Muslim boy's life being put in jeopardy by his love of [[Sonichu]], and some wacko promoting 2D love.

	Chris was scheduled to answer them all on the 29th, but he didn't actually get around to it until 1 [[December 2009\|December]]. His responses were more pompous and condescending than ever ~~before~~. The irony in lecturing about employment and cleaning ~~seems~~ to be completely lost on him. He responded to the second letter in the mailbag by explaining why he's fully justified in closing his mind to the idea of [[~~Autism~~]] and [[Asperger's Syndrome]] being similar, then in the very next letter he ~~berates~~ someone for following a closed-minded religion. Presumably Chris ~~wants~~ her to open her mind and her [[china\|vagina]]. Other ~~Highlights include~~ Chris desperately trying to come up with ways the Rosechus are different, and claiming that Albert Einstein was autistic.		Chris was scheduled to answer them all on the 29th, but he didn't actually get around to it until 1 [[December 2009\|December]]. His responses were more pompous and condescending than ever. The irony in lecturing about employment and cleaning seemed to be completely lost on him. He responded to the second letter in the mailbag by explaining why he was fully justified in closing his mind to the idea of [[autism]] and [[Asperger's Syndrome]] being similar; then in the very next letter, he berated someone for following a closed-minded religion. Presumably, Chris wanted her to open her mind and her [[china\|vagina]]. Other highlights included Chris desperately trying to come up with ways the Rosechus are different, and claiming that Albert Einstein was autistic.

	==Answered==		==Answered==

Promethean: /* Michael Parker's last stand */

2015-10-28T09:51:10Z

Michael Parker's last stand

← Older revision		Revision as of 05:51, 28 October 2015
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	<nowiki>A NOTE: I am NOT calling people with Aspergers Retared; ONLY their skills in speech and mental capabilities are not as quick as those with Autism.</nowiki>		<nowiki>A NOTE: I am NOT calling people with Aspergers Retared; ONLY their skills in speech and mental capabilities are not as quick as those with Autism.</nowiki>

	So put that in your pipe and smoke it. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu\|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:14, 2 December 2009 (CET)}}		So put that in your pipe and [[tobacky\|smoke]] it. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu\|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:14, 2 December 2009 (CET)}}

	===In which Chris destroys an Iranian family===		===In which Chris destroys an Iranian family===

Promethean: /* Grrrlpowaanow 2: the Christianing */

2015-10-28T09:39:10Z

Grrrlpowaanow 2: the Christianing

← Older revision		Revision as of 05:39, 28 October 2015
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	May God have mercy on you.}}		May God have mercy on you.}}
	{{EmailReply\|In response to your first paragraph, obviously you have not opened your mind to all things in life, and your religion is a closed-minded one. Second, a lot of people have gone to [[Angelica]]'s church; male volunteers have shared with Angelica their views and opinions on all things as well, so she was Not Without a male role-model. Third, Sex Is Natural; regardless of it being for procreation or for fun, and I agree you that sex should ONLY be truly enjoyed between Man and Woman; not between homos. Fourth, I have had MY OWN fly-off emotional moments too on rare occasions; you are no different I'm sure. You certainly let yourself go in typing your message.		{{EmailReply\|In response to your first paragraph, obviously you have not opened your mind to all things in life, and your religion is a closed-minded one. Second, a lot of people have gone to [[Angelica]]'s church; male volunteers have shared with Angelica their views and opinions on all things as well, so she was Not Without a male role-model. Third, Sex Is Natural; regardless of it being for procreation or for fun, and I agree you that sex should ONLY be truly enjoyed between Man and Woman; not between homos. Fourth, I have had MY OWN [[anger\|fly-off emotional moments]] too on rare occasions; you are no different I'm sure. You certainly let yourself go in typing your message.

	I am a [[Methodist]]; I pray to [[God and Jesus]] every day; I read my Bible; I volunteer myself for good deeds and such often. Last Sunday, I was asked to read a verse and light the First Advent Candle; that was definitely a most honorable volunteer job, and I did very well in citing the verse with gusto and feeling.		I am a [[Methodist]]; I pray to [[God and Jesus]] every day; I read my Bible; I volunteer myself for good deeds and such often. Last Sunday, I was asked to read a verse and light the First Advent Candle; that was definitely a most honorable volunteer job, and I did very well in citing the verse with gusto and feeling.

Asperhes: /* Harry Potter: total spaz */

2015-10-22T10:51:45Z

Harry Potter: total spaz

← Older revision		Revision as of 06:51, 22 October 2015
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	Thanks a lot man, if i ever see a troll, i will kick him in the groin.}}		Thanks a lot man, if i ever see a troll, i will kick him in the groin.}}
	{{EmailReply\|I can't say that I know the current artists of this century. R.L. Stein's "The Haunted Mask" from "Goosebumps". He dared compete against Pok'emon, PLUS he is a total Spaz, and I just do not care for him at all. I think I would be up for it. I have enjoyed Dickens more. I will continue on Sonichu with other projects on the side. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu\|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:14, 2 December 2009 (CET)}}		{{EmailReply\|I can't say that I know the current artists of this century. [[R.L. Stine\|R.L. Stein]]'s "The Haunted Mask" from "Goosebumps". He dared compete against Pok'emon, PLUS he is a total Spaz, and I just do not care for him at all. I think I would be up for it. I have enjoyed Dickens more. I will continue on Sonichu with other projects on the side. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu\|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:14, 2 December 2009 (CET)}}

	===In which Chris acts unreasonable while calling everybody else unreasonable===		===In which Chris acts unreasonable while calling everybody else unreasonable===

Asperhes: /* Strict on homosexuality */

2015-04-12T02:21:34Z

Strict on homosexuality

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:21, 11 April 2015
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	===Strict on homosexuality===		===Strict on homosexuality===
	{{Email\|From: Heather C <flowerofpeace@hotmail.com>		{{Email\|From: Heather C <flowerofpeace@hotmail.com>
	Please respond, Christian.		<nowiki></nowiki>Please respond, Christian.

	Hey Chris!		Hey Chris!

Anonymax at 17:48, 18 December 2011

2011-12-18T17:48:21Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:48, 18 December 2011
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	This mailbag contains several encore appearances of people featured in previous mailbags, namely [[Mailbag 4#In which Chris is rude to a young girl\|the devout 14-year old girl]], aspiring artist [[Mailbag 2#This looks shopped\|Emmy Bardot]] and Alaskan-native Levi Johnston. There are a few e-mails carefully designed to gently bring up topics that Chris is in serious denial about, such as his [[obesity]]. There are also a few weird ones, like a Muslim boy's love of [[Sonichu]] threatening his life, and some wacko promoting 2D love.		This mailbag contains several encore appearances of people featured in previous mailbags, namely [[Mailbag 4#In which Chris is rude to a young girl\|the devout 14-year old girl]], aspiring artist [[Mailbag 2#This looks shopped\|Emmy Bardot]] and Alaskan-native Levi Johnston. There are a few e-mails carefully designed to gently bring up topics that Chris is in serious denial about, such as his [[obesity]]. There are also a few weird ones, like a Muslim boy's love of [[Sonichu]] threatening his life, and some wacko promoting 2D love.

	~~Chis~~ was scheduled to answer them all on the 29th, but he didn't actually get around to it until 1 [[December 2009\|December]]. His responses were more pompous and condescending than ever before. The irony in lecturing about employment and cleaning seems to be completely lost on him. He responded to the second letter in the mailbag by explaining why he's fully justified in closing his mind to the idea of [[Autism]] and [[Asperger's Syndrome]] being similar, then in the very next letter he berates someone for following a closed-minded religion. Presumably Chris wants her to open her mind and her [[china\|vagina]]. Other Highlights include Chris desperately trying to come up with ways the Rosechus are different, and claiming that Albert Einstein was autistic.		Chris was scheduled to answer them all on the 29th, but he didn't actually get around to it until 1 [[December 2009\|December]]. His responses were more pompous and condescending than ever before. The irony in lecturing about employment and cleaning seems to be completely lost on him. He responded to the second letter in the mailbag by explaining why he's fully justified in closing his mind to the idea of [[Autism]] and [[Asperger's Syndrome]] being similar, then in the very next letter he berates someone for following a closed-minded religion. Presumably Chris wants her to open her mind and her [[china\|vagina]]. Other Highlights include Chris desperately trying to come up with ways the Rosechus are different, and claiming that Albert Einstein was autistic.

	==Answered==		==Answered==

Trombonista at 19:21, 16 December 2011

2011-12-16T19:21:16Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 15:21, 16 December 2011
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	<br>6- I love Sonichu, but i gotta ask you man, would you move to a different project if sonichu doesn't show profit in the next five years or someone in the professional industry told you is not good enough?		<br>6- I love Sonichu, but i gotta ask you man, would you move to a different project if sonichu doesn't show profit in the next five years or someone in the professional industry told you is not good enough?

	Thanks a lot man, if i ever see a troll, i will kick him in the groin. }}		Thanks a lot man, if i ever see a troll, i will kick him in the groin.}}
	{{EmailReply\|I can't say that I know the current artists of this century. R.L. Stein's "The Haunted Mask" from "Goosebumps". He dared compete against Pok'emon, PLUS he is a total Spaz, and I just do not care for him at all. I think I would be up for it. I have enjoyed Dickens more. I will continue on Sonichu with other projects on the side. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu\|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:14, 2 December 2009 (CET)}}		{{EmailReply\|I can't say that I know the current artists of this century. R.L. Stein's "The Haunted Mask" from "Goosebumps". He dared compete against Pok'emon, PLUS he is a total Spaz, and I just do not care for him at all. I think I would be up for it. I have enjoyed Dickens more. I will continue on Sonichu with other projects on the side. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu\|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:14, 2 December 2009 (CET)}}