Sonichu's News Dash - Revision history

Elbow-Greased Strongman at 12:45, 26 January 2026

2026-01-26T12:45:43Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 08:45, 26 January 2026
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	[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg\|thumb\|300px\|[[Audiobooks\|LOOK AT THAT FACE GOD DAMN]]]]		[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg\|thumb\|300px\|[[Audiobooks\|LOOK AT THAT FACE GOD DAMN]]]]

	{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, ~~believing~~ your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}		{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, under the belief that publishing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}

	'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of [[Bob Chandler\|fringe kooks]], [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, dubious [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].		'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of [[Bob Chandler\|fringe kooks]], [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, dubious [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].

Elbow-Greased Strongman at 16:18, 16 January 2026

2026-01-16T16:18:12Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 12:18, 16 January 2026
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	{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, believing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}		{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, believing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}

	'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of [[Bob Chandler\|fringe kooks]], [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, ~~highly defective~~ [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].		'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of [[Bob Chandler\|fringe kooks]], [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, dubious [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].

	Chris was scolded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for littering the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] campus with copies, which led him to bear a grudge against her to this day.		Chris was scolded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for littering the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] campus with copies, which led him to bear a grudge against her to this day.

Amanitie: /* Chris's dating tips */ Disambiguated link

2024-10-23T12:51:21Z

Chris's dating tips: Disambiguated link

← Older revision		Revision as of 08:51, 23 October 2024
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	* (CWC) If you are meeting her for the first time, just keep a cool head, and be yourself. But if you want a quick list of what to do, here’s my list, courtesy of the [[Sprung]] game for the [[Nintendo]] DS:		* (CWC) If you are meeting her for the first time, just keep a cool head, and be yourself. But if you want a quick list of what to do, here’s my list, courtesy of the [[Sprung]] game for the [[Nintendo]] DS:
	* Introduce yourself: try to [[The Creepy Stare\|look serious]] on your face; do not [[Fangs\|smile big]], and do not use a [[Speech impediment\|forceful voice tone]].		* Introduce yourself: try to [[The Creepy Stare\|look serious]] on your face; do not [[Fangs\|smile big]], and do not use a [[Speech impediment\|forceful voice tone]].
	* Compliment her: on her [[hair]] or [[eyes]].		* Compliment her: on her [[hair]] or [[Creepy stare\|eyes]].
	* Break the Ice with a [[Christian's sex joke\|joke]]: try not to use an [[Twin Falling Towers\|offensive joke]]. Or, you can do what I do, if you can, just imitate good ol’ [[Donald Duck]]. Quack! Quack!		* Break the Ice with a [[Christian's sex joke\|joke]]: try not to use an [[Twin Falling Towers\|offensive joke]]. Or, you can do what I do, if you can, just imitate good ol’ [[Donald Duck]]. Quack! Quack!
	* (Depending on the situation), offer to buy her a [[CWC Cola\|drink]], or comment on a topic of interest (such as the [[Lovely Weather\|weather]]).		* (Depending on the situation), offer to buy her a [[CWC Cola\|drink]], or comment on a topic of interest (such as the [[Lovely Weather\|weather]]).
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	* (John Tesh) Your date is very important. If you take her to a party, then you probably feel like you need the support of your friends in front of your girlfriend. If you take her to a movie, you are likely to want her to yourself, and sneak a smooch in the dark. But if you take her to dinner, then you are showing real interest, because you are most able to converse over a [[McDonald's\|good meal]].		* (John Tesh) Your date is very important. If you take her to a party, then you probably feel like you need the support of your friends in front of your girlfriend. If you take her to a movie, you are likely to want her to yourself, and sneak a smooch in the dark. But if you take her to dinner, then you are showing real interest, because you are most able to converse over a [[McDonald's\|good meal]].
	* (John Tesh) When you want to watch a movie with her, you should pick a romance flick. Since you and she are less likely to feel romantic during any other movie category, like action or horror. And hey, she will most appreciate the love you show by sharing the chick flick, because it shows that you care about her feelings<ref name="news7">[https://web.archive.org/web/20210509201206/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews7.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #7 (January/February 2004)]</ref>.}}		* (John Tesh) When you want to watch a movie with her, you should pick a romance flick. Since you and she are less likely to feel romantic during any other movie category, like action or horror. And hey, she will most appreciate the love you show by sharing the chick flick, because it shows that you care about her feelings<ref name="news7">[https://web.archive.org/web/20210509201206/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews7.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #7 (January/February 2004)]</ref>.}}


	===Prelude to [[Silvana]]===		===Prelude to [[Silvana]]===

Amanitie: Added category

2024-09-22T21:04:40Z

Added category

← Older revision		Revision as of 17:04, 22 September 2024
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	{{Writings}}		{{Writings}}
	[[Category:Media produced by Chris-chan]]		[[Category:Media produced by Chris-chan]]
			[[Category:PVCC Saga]]

Hurtful Truth Level at 20:16, 13 January 2023

2023-01-13T20:16:30Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 16:16, 13 January 2023
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	==The ''News Dash!'' Incident, in Chris's own words==		==The ''News Dash!'' Incident, in Chris's own words==
	{{quote\|Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM [[Chris and anger\|VERY ANGRY]] AT THAT XXXXX! In response, Iplan to incite the [[True and Loyal Fanbase\|masses]], and hope they DEMAND the return the News Dash so my chances on [[Love Quest\|getting a girlfriend]] can be restored. I have also declared WAR on them as well!\|Chris, greatly overestimating his own power<ref>[[Other]]</ref>}}		{{quote\|Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM [[Chris and anger\|VERY ANGRY]] AT THAT XXXXX! In response, Iplan to incite the [[True and Loyal Fanbase\|masses]], and hope they DEMAND the return the News Dash so my chances on [[Love Quest\|getting a girlfriend]] can be restored. I have also declared WAR on them as well!\|Chris, greatly overestimating his own power<ref>[[Other documents]]</ref>}}

	==Sources==		==Sources==

Gray Deign: Replacing dead links with archives, this may be reverted if internal cwcville archive is fixed

2022-10-31T19:11:39Z

Replacing dead links with archives, this may be reverted if internal cwcville archive is fixed

← Older revision		Revision as of 15:11, 31 October 2022
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	~~{{DeadLinks}}~~
	{{Articleofthenow}}		{{Articleofthenow}}
	[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg\|thumb\|300px\|[[Audiobooks\|LOOK AT THAT FACE GOD DAMN]]]]		[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg\|thumb\|300px\|[[Audiobooks\|LOOK AT THAT FACE GOD DAMN]]]]
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	'''		'''

	We here at Sonichu’s News Dash apologize for not writing up issues during the summer months, but the head chief of staff, Christian Weston Chandler, was in a Very Lonesome slump. And he was recently Soul and [[Heart level\|Heart-Shattered]] by a bunch of [[Jerk Cops]] at the Fashion Square shopping center, and by the female dog, [[Mary Lee Walsh]], at Piedmont Virginia Community College. These people did not agree with his sound methods of attracting an 18-(his current age) Boyfriend-Free woman. But after a stroll through the lovely and serene campus at the [[University of Virginia]], he regained some peace within himself. And so, while he is still journeying through his [[Love Quest]], the News Dash will run Bi-Monthly, but with more general articles of interest. Thank you for your patience.<ref name="news5">[~~http~~://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews5.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #5 (September/October 2004)]</ref>}}		We here at Sonichu’s News Dash apologize for not writing up issues during the summer months, but the head chief of staff, Christian Weston Chandler, was in a Very Lonesome slump. And he was recently Soul and [[Heart level\|Heart-Shattered]] by a bunch of [[Jerk Cops]] at the Fashion Square shopping center, and by the female dog, [[Mary Lee Walsh]], at Piedmont Virginia Community College. These people did not agree with his sound methods of attracting an 18-(his current age) Boyfriend-Free woman. But after a stroll through the lovely and serene campus at the [[University of Virginia]], he regained some peace within himself. And so, while he is still journeying through his [[Love Quest]], the News Dash will run Bi-Monthly, but with more general articles of interest. Thank you for your patience.<ref name="news5">[https://web.archive.org/web/20211019170416/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews5.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #5 (September/October 2004)]</ref>}}

	===Sonichu goes to the [[University of Virginia]] library===		===Sonichu goes to the [[University of Virginia]] library===
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	• Wrap the presents anyway, because they always want to rip up the wrapping paper like a candy bar.<br>		• Wrap the presents anyway, because they always want to rip up the wrapping paper like a candy bar.<br>
	• Always remember that Christmas is the celebration of family, so [[Cole Smithey\|never leave out any relatives]] from your festivities.<br>		• Always remember that Christmas is the celebration of family, so [[Cole Smithey\|never leave out any relatives]] from your festivities.<br>
	• If you do not have a family, then find a friend to share C-Mas with <ref name="News6">[~~http~~://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews6.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #6 (November/December 2004)]</ref>.}}		• If you do not have a family, then find a friend to share C-Mas with <ref name="News6">[https://web.archive.org/web/20201229114105/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews6.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #6 (November/December 2004)]</ref>.}}

	===Chris wants a girlfriend for Christmas===		===Chris wants a girlfriend for Christmas===
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	*(CWC) Most importantly, DO NOT RUSH Her. You do not want her to feel pressured into a relationship, because then she’ll dump you faster than Sonichu [[Sonichu's Edge\|running a mile]]. Give her time; it’s not like you all are going to get married right away, it never is.		*(CWC) Most importantly, DO NOT RUSH Her. You do not want her to feel pressured into a relationship, because then she’ll dump you faster than Sonichu [[Sonichu's Edge\|running a mile]]. Give her time; it’s not like you all are going to get married right away, it never is.
	* (John Tesh) Your date is very important. If you take her to a party, then you probably feel like you need the support of your friends in front of your girlfriend. If you take her to a movie, you are likely to want her to yourself, and sneak a smooch in the dark. But if you take her to dinner, then you are showing real interest, because you are most able to converse over a [[McDonald's\|good meal]].		* (John Tesh) Your date is very important. If you take her to a party, then you probably feel like you need the support of your friends in front of your girlfriend. If you take her to a movie, you are likely to want her to yourself, and sneak a smooch in the dark. But if you take her to dinner, then you are showing real interest, because you are most able to converse over a [[McDonald's\|good meal]].
	* (John Tesh) When you want to watch a movie with her, you should pick a romance flick. Since you and she are less likely to feel romantic during any other movie category, like action or horror. And hey, she will most appreciate the love you show by sharing the chick flick, because it shows that you care about her feelings<ref name="news7">[~~http~~://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews7.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #7 (January/February 2004)]</ref>.}}		* (John Tesh) When you want to watch a movie with her, you should pick a romance flick. Since you and she are less likely to feel romantic during any other movie category, like action or horror. And hey, she will most appreciate the love you show by sharing the chick flick, because it shows that you care about her feelings<ref name="news7">[https://web.archive.org/web/20210509201206/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews7.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #7 (January/February 2004)]</ref>.}}


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	'''Free Personal AD in Nintendo Power Magazine!'''		'''Free Personal AD in Nintendo Power Magazine!'''

	I, Christian Weston Chandler, have sent an E-Mail to [[Nintendo Power]]’s “Players’ Pulse” section on January 9, 2005, in response to Nintendo DS’s Sprung game (scanned pages shown above). After receiving my copy of the April, 2005 issue, I was pleasantly surprised to find my E-Mail printed in the “Players’ Pulse” section, with the screen shot (shown to the bottom-right), which I find very appropriate to my current situation. The girl on top says, “YOU BETTER GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE MY BOYFRIEND KICKS YOUR ***!” Although, there are a couple of fixes to mend in their print out: the fear I was referring to should be “[[Noviophobia\|NOVIOPHOBIA]],” not “NOIOPHOBIA.” Also, since February 24, 2005, I am now 23-years old, and I am looking for an 18-23-year old, Boyfiend-Free, Datable Girl whom I can love and trust. Also, a little time after using the teachings of Sprung, my fear came back like a boomerang<ref name="news8">[~~http~~://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews8.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #8 (March/April 2004)]</ref>.}}		I, Christian Weston Chandler, have sent an E-Mail to [[Nintendo Power]]’s “Players’ Pulse” section on January 9, 2005, in response to Nintendo DS’s Sprung game (scanned pages shown above). After receiving my copy of the April, 2005 issue, I was pleasantly surprised to find my E-Mail printed in the “Players’ Pulse” section, with the screen shot (shown to the bottom-right), which I find very appropriate to my current situation. The girl on top says, “YOU BETTER GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE MY BOYFRIEND KICKS YOUR ***!” Although, there are a couple of fixes to mend in their print out: the fear I was referring to should be “[[Noviophobia\|NOVIOPHOBIA]],” not “NOIOPHOBIA.” Also, since February 24, 2005, I am now 23-years old, and I am looking for an 18-23-year old, Boyfiend-Free, Datable Girl whom I can love and trust. Also, a little time after using the teachings of Sprung, my fear came back like a boomerang<ref name="news8">[https://web.archive.org/web/20201229114210/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews8.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #8 (March/April 2004)]</ref>.}}

	===Chris's 23rd Birthday===		===Chris's 23rd Birthday===
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	'''Sonichu Comic Book is Completed!'''		'''Sonichu Comic Book is Completed!'''

	Yes, Sonichu fans, the Premiere Hand-Drawn issue of the Sonichu Comic Book has been completed. The project was started with the Cover drawing (see issue #6 of the News Dash for the previous information) back on November 24, [[2004]], and since then, with [[Things Chris has ripped off\|random inspiration]] and [[Video games\|too many breaks]], the book was completed on March 15, [[2005]]. The Comic includes the first 3 Episodes of our heroic Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon, Sonichu, classic strips drawn before the Comic project and two “Advertisements” for possible future games ([[Miyamoto Saga\|at least in Christian W. Chandler’s dreams]]). CWC said, “Well, it took a long time, all things considered, but I feel that this Comic is my best work yet. I have also recently made a Sub-Episode that, one may say, started right after the Epilogue in Episode 3; it will be placed exclusively on the Sonichu Site for the fans to see. Also, I’m thinking about a Premiere Issue #1 featuring the story of how [[Black Sonichu]] was created, as well as how [[Sonichu]] and [[Sonic]] the Hedgehog “formally” met. 8) I’ll keep you up to date as I am inspired; until then, keep on “Zappin’ to the Extreme!” On the Sonichu Site, there will be two ways to access the Comic: through a link on the front page, or click on the Back Cover image (shown below) in this issue of the News Dash<ref name="news9">[~~http~~://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews9.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #9 (April 2005)]</ref>.}}		Yes, Sonichu fans, the Premiere Hand-Drawn issue of the Sonichu Comic Book has been completed. The project was started with the Cover drawing (see issue #6 of the News Dash for the previous information) back on November 24, [[2004]], and since then, with [[Things Chris has ripped off\|random inspiration]] and [[Video games\|too many breaks]], the book was completed on March 15, [[2005]]. The Comic includes the first 3 Episodes of our heroic Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon, Sonichu, classic strips drawn before the Comic project and two “Advertisements” for possible future games ([[Miyamoto Saga\|at least in Christian W. Chandler’s dreams]]). CWC said, “Well, it took a long time, all things considered, but I feel that this Comic is my best work yet. I have also recently made a Sub-Episode that, one may say, started right after the Epilogue in Episode 3; it will be placed exclusively on the Sonichu Site for the fans to see. Also, I’m thinking about a Premiere Issue #1 featuring the story of how [[Black Sonichu]] was created, as well as how [[Sonichu]] and [[Sonic]] the Hedgehog “formally” met. 8) I’ll keep you up to date as I am inspired; until then, keep on “Zappin’ to the Extreme!” On the Sonichu Site, there will be two ways to access the Comic: through a link on the front page, or click on the Back Cover image (shown below) in this issue of the News Dash<ref name="news9">[https://web.archive.org/web/20210123080609/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchusNews9.htm Sonichu's News Dash Issue #9 (April 2005)]</ref>.}}

	===Chris plans to hustle Sonichu at a con===		===Chris plans to hustle Sonichu at a con===
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	<references/>		<references/>
	==External links==		==External links==
	*[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/newdash.htm ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' archive]		*[https://web.archive.org/web/20120116152244/http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/newdash.htm ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' archive]
	*[~~http~~://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuNewsLost1.htm First edition of Issue #2]		*[https://web.archive.org/web/20201229114048/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuNewsLost1.htm First edition of Issue #2]


	{{Writings}}		{{Writings}}
	[[Category:Media produced by Chris-chan]]		[[Category:Media produced by Chris-chan]]

Larry the Larryhog at 01:40, 16 November 2021

2021-11-16T01:40:22Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 21:40, 15 November 2021
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			{{DeadLinks}}
	{{Articleofthenow}}		{{Articleofthenow}}
	[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg\|thumb\|300px\|[[Audiobooks\|LOOK AT THAT FACE GOD DAMN]]]]		[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg\|thumb\|300px\|[[Audiobooks\|LOOK AT THAT FACE GOD DAMN]]]]

Chris-Chad at 16:10, 12 July 2021

2021-07-12T16:10:45Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 12:10, 12 July 2021
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	{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, believing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}		{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, believing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}

	'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of fringe kooks, [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, highly defective [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].		'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of [[Bob Chandler\|fringe kooks]], [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, highly defective [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].

	Chris was scolded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for littering the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] campus with copies, which led him to bear a grudge against her to this day.		Chris was scolded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for littering the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] campus with copies, which led him to bear a grudge against her to this day.

Superspongebobbros at 00:29, 12 April 2021

2021-04-12T00:29:07Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:29, 11 April 2021
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	{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, believing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}		{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, believing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}

	'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of fringe kooks, [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], survivalist tree-dwellers, [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, highly defective [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].		'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of fringe kooks, [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, highly defective [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].

	Chris was scolded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for littering the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] campus with copies, which led him to bear a grudge against her to this day.		Chris was scolded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for littering the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] campus with copies, which led him to bear a grudge against her to this day.

Chris-Chad at 01:25, 6 January 2021

2021-01-06T01:25:24Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 21:25, 5 January 2021
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	{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, believing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}		{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, believing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}

	'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of fringe kooks, conspiracy theorists, survivalist tree-dwellers, religious oddballs and radical doomsday prophets. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, highly defective [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].		'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of fringe kooks, [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], survivalist tree-dwellers, [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, highly defective [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].

	Chris was scolded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for littering the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] campus with copies, which led him to bear a grudge against her to this day.		Chris was scolded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for littering the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] campus with copies, which led him to bear a grudge against her to this day.

← Older revision		Revision as of 08:45, 26 January 2026
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	[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg\|thumb\|300px\|[[Audiobooks\|LOOK AT THAT FACE GOD DAMN]]]]		[[Image:199-newsdsh.jpg\|thumb\|300px\|[[Audiobooks\|LOOK AT THAT FACE GOD DAMN]]]]

	{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, ~~believing~~ your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}		{{quote\|Well, it’s the end of another month, and I still don’t have a [[Sweetheart\|girlfriend]]. Maybe my latest idea, the [[Sonichu]]’s News Dash! newsletter, will make the ladies take notice of me.\|Chris, under the belief that publishing your own newsletter will attract women, 31 January 2004}}

	'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of [[Bob Chandler\|fringe kooks]], [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, dubious [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].		'''''Sonichu's News Dash!''''' was a newsletter distributed by [[Christian Weston Chandler\|Chris]] from [[2004]]–[[2005\|05]], in the finest tradition of [[Bob Chandler\|fringe kooks]], [[Conspiracy theories\|conspiracy theorists]], [[Wild Sonichu\|survivalist tree-dwellers]], [[Chris and religion\|religious oddballs]] and [[Dimensional Merge\|radical doomsday prophets]]. Chris once decided that printing up a newsletter would be the best way to attract [[boyfriend-free girl]]s. ''Sonichu's News Dash!'' often contained poetry, dubious [[Dating education\|dating advice]], and details on Chris's life and personal interests. It would always end with his description of his requirements for a [[sweetheart]], similar to what was printed on his [[Attraction Sign]].