Chris and death

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Sometimes I remember her, but I have moved on.
Chris on the late PandaHalo.[1]
And dying is not happening with me; I'm set to stay alive for thousands of years.
Chris, over 10 years later, being absolutely delusional on Discord.[2]
Rest in peace...?

Death is a concept that Chris has a notably hard time understanding and/or coping with, be it the death of a human or an animal, or even an imaginary friend.

His poor reactions to death most likely come from Chris's near-inability to empathize (a common symptom of autism), and childish thought patterns. Children often don't understand death, usually just thinking it's "like sleeping forever", "just leaving", or in Chris's mind, "merged with their counterpart from C-197." Chris, being a child inside, can only resort to these clumsy analogies to understand death.

Family

Various ancestors

Chris claimed that, at Aunt Corrina's funeral, his ancestors wished him a safe trip to Ohio to meet Julie.[3]

Patti (1988–2006)

Patti was the Chandler family's pet dog, who died in June 2006. Chris apparently drew a picture of a crying Sonichu face on the signature confirming the euthanasia process.[4] As seen in the image used in this article, Patti also appeared in the comic, immortalized as a furry character named Patti-Chan. This is particularly disturbing in that Chris has apparently decided to deny his dog the afterlife that he presumably believes in in favor of locking her in his own personal hell.

To Chris, her death is the greatest tragedy of his life, which he often compares to the deaths of other people's family members and loved ones. Unsurprisingly, every single person he has said this to has become horribly offended. In Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash, he equates Ryan Cash's death with Patti's, and in the Father Call, he equates the death of Matthew Devoria's mother in the 9/11 attacks.

On the 1-year anniversary of her death, Chris even broke down in tears and had to be consoled by his mother.[5] By comparison, the "death" of any sweetheart will result in a few days of mourning at best.

It should be noted though that despite all of Chris's fondness for Patti, her memory was still not safe from being defiled by trolls manipulating him.

Aunt Corrina (1936–2009)

Chris's aunt Corrina had her funeral on Chris's birthday, which was also Shrove Tuesday, a Christian holiday that involves eating pancakes. Needless to say, Chris cared more about the pancakes than the funeral of his own aunt.

When the "I know how to be sad because my dog died" excuse fails, Chris usually follows up with an offhand mention of his Aunt Corrina. If that fails, the deaths of his many sweethearts tends to follow.

Chandler Cats

Several of the Chandler Cats have died, in ways ranging from illness, old age, or being trapped in the house fire. Many are also outdoor cats and presumably met their ends while outside. Despite the unusually high death count, Chris insists on taking in new strays when a previous cat dies.

Bob Chandler (1927–2011)

After a long battle with heart failure, Bob's life came to an end while he was being hospitalized in the Martha Jefferson Hospital's ICU.[6] The fact that on the day Bob died Chris posted an online attraction sign in the form of a Facebook note reflects poorly on him. However, he later told Jackie that "my heavier cries from my father's passing is really hitting me bad", and lamented that in a previous dream the Grim Reaper had promised that he would not claim Bob until 2015.[7]

In a March 31, 2012 Facebook message, Chris expressed a desire for Bob's ghost to haunt the dreams of anyone who doesn't like him, putting him on the exact same level as his dead dog. While this was an understandable reaction to discovering "plans" that trolls were going to dig her up, or discovering a webcomic that contained what he considered a mockery of her memory, his threat to send Bob's ghost after people is equal parts disrespectful and unreasonable.

In a Facebook post from June of 2013, Chris laments that he had more freedom when his father was still alive, and goes onto complain about how he has to take time out of his day to "serve and protect" his mother. Knowing Chris, this presumably means that he sat around in his room playing vidya while his elderly father did most of the work around the house.

Barbara Chandler (1941–)

Barbara, much like Bob before his death, has been experiencing many illnesses in the past few years. Barbara was obese, and this contributes to her poor health, examples of which include oversleeping and bed sores. In August 2013, Chris revealed that Barbara is now a breast cancer survivor, which reveals that she suffers from far more serious health problems than initially thought. It may not be long before Barb keels over as well, which would ultimately leave Chris with no coddling matriarch to provide support for or keep him company, and in the grander scheme of things, without parents.

Even today, where everyone's favorite manchild will go from there remains a mystery, especially since it was revealed in an October 2013 Facebook post that Chris considers Barbara to be one of the few people who gives meaning and purpose to his life.

Alongside Bob, who Chris entered a protracted period of grieving for after his passing, Barb is one of the few people in Chris's life that he cares about enough to genuinely fear her passing, and Barb has used this to manipulate Chris into following orders on multiple occasions; one such instance of this was in 2011 (prior to Bob's death), in which she threatened to commit suicide if Chris committed the ungodly sin of visiting MAGfest in Maryland that year. Terrified and distraught, Chris backpedalled, receiving only more guilt-tripping and a payment on some vidya as a consolation prize.[8]

In November 2015, Chris released Family Needs to appreciate Family, where he addressed Cole Smithey, David Alan Chandler and Carol Suzanne Chandler to visit Barb before "her time runs out".

In November 2019, Chris posted a tweet where he copes on the mortality of his mother, imaging her becoming a part-human/part-Rosechu hybrid after death, in the same vein he believed that Bob reincarnated into Robertchu after death.[9]

Chris himself (1982–)

Given Chris's notoriously bad diet, lack of activity, hygiene or social interaction, on top of a complete lack of motivation or concern for anything other than himself, it is generally considered unlikely that Chris will live very far into his forties should he persist in his current lifestyle.

However, there is a likelihood that like Bob, who lived into his mid-eighties despite suffering from (and eventually passing away as a result of) heart failure and alcoholism, he may be genetically disposed to lead a long, albeit miserable life.

And Believe Me, IN DREAMS, and even IN MOMENTS within my mind while AWAKE, I HAVE SEEN AND FELT That Death Light. Not only is it the Most Horrifying Thing Ever, but I am LOOOONG NOT READY FOR IT YET.
Chris, on his visions of death.[10]

In a conversation with the CWCipedia Sysop, Chris once mentioned that he had been receiving recurring visions of himself walking into a bright light, which he one day hoped would be prevented from appearing by getting a sweetheart. After the surreal conclusion of the love quest in 2018, it is unknown if he still gets these visions.

In a Facebook post on 30 October 2013, Chris stated that he had become so stressed out (specifically, over the revelation that his high school gal-pals did not actually like him much at all), that he had contemplated killing himself multiple times. According to Chris, the only reasons he did not go through with it are painfully obvious. This shows just how much Chris's mentality has drained, and how badly he needs the professional help he so stubbornly refuses to get. Of course, this could well be Chris exaggerating and trying to gain pity as he has done in the past, and as his mother allegedly also has (or at least, used to have) a habit of doing. In all seriousness, however, suicide is no laughing matter, and this should be looked at with caution.

In a 2019 Discord chat between his fantasy enablers, Chris had claimed that he is set to live for thousands of years.[11]

Imaginary friends

Chris is also concerned over the deaths of his imaginary friends such as Sonichu and his pals. Since Chris believes all cartoon characters exist in some universe, and he had created Sonichu's, he feels that if he were to reboot the comics, that would mean that Sonichu and his friends would all die, and that they would all reincarnate into their newer rebooted versions.[12] Being his love and joy, the last thing on Chris' mind would be to kill his creations, but yet is perfectly fine with freezing them in time with his hiatus on the series.

Ironically, even when Chris inevitably does pass on and go to meet GodBear, he will still be remembered; not only for his life and the many humorous misadventures in it, but for his comics. Thus, it can be said that Sonichu will never truly die.

Simonla Rosechu

The bastard child in question.

During the Asperchu saga, a recurring theme was Evan's legal claims in regard to Simonla Rosechu as a derivative of his character, Simonchu. While early demands were for Chris to edit his old strips to remove Simonla entirely from continuity, later Evan consented to letting Chris keep Simonla's early appearances, on the grounds that he kill her at a later date. Chris, not surprisingly, totally lost his shit, showing a much stronger emotional attachment to an empty, one-dimensional fictional character than he has managed for any living creature other than his dog. Finally, after being faced with the threat of legal action, Chris finally killed Simonla in issue #10, though not before she laid an egg out of wedlock with her baby-daddy Wild (though, of course, the act of laying the egg was never shown, or even mentioned), which hatched into Sandy Rosechu.

Simonla's death apparently continued to haunt Chris long afterwards. This led to him reviving Simonla around May 2014, more than four years after her demise. It should be noted that, as revealed in the Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls, Chris considers cartoon characters to be real, living creatures that exist in some other world reminiscent of Toon Town from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Simonla's death was as real to him as that of any of his family members or sweethearts... perhaps even more so.

Troll manipulation

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RocketFox's Dad (1966–2008)

RocketFox's Dad used to be an alcoholic, but recovered and stayed sober for ten years. However, his liver failed and he passed away in mid-October 2008. When RocketFox asked Chris for advice on how to cope, Chris considered it an "accident" and went on a spiel about how bad alcohol was.[13] This is actually the first death during the trolling, and it was mentioned to Chris to see how he would react to such news, and as mentioned, Chris did so poorly. Ryan's death and Chris's reaction cemented this.

Ryan Cash (1996–2008)

Ryan was Clyde's brother who was a huge fan of the Sonichu comics. After they were delayed over and over, Ryan fell into a depression and committed suicide. Chris, of course, reacted to this in an inconsiderate manner, telling Clyde and his family to "just move on", and marveling at his power to incite suicide. He also suggested that Clyde get a girlfriend who could make him just as happy as Ryan could have, which (disturbing implications aside) indicates that Chris seems to regard people as more or less fungible. This also helps explain why Chris seems to be able to move on so quickly when one of his online "heartsweets" meets some unfortunate demise.

BILLY MAYS (1958–2009)

In Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009, Chris only seems to be upset over people blaming him for MAYS's death, and loudly denies that BILLY had ever been the mayor of CWCville. He doesn't even offer his condolences to MAYS's family. Down the line, Chris selfishly adopts the idea that MAYS was in fact his bodyguard and he died protecting Chris.

In Sonichu #9, Chris slaps in a one-page intro with BILLY saying that he was never was the Mayor, but was part of Chris's group. At the bottom was a message from Chris, asking him to "come back soon."

PandaHalo (d. 2009?)

Despite her being hundreds of kilometers away from the bushfires, Chris assumed PandaHalo was dead. She is actually alive and kicking but Chris still doesn't know this. Two days after her "death", he went to find another sweetheart to mass debate to, saying "It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point."[14]

Nine months later, Sonichu #9 featured a special "memorial" to PandaHalo and a sequence in which she dies (off-screen) in a building fire after saving her "Pokemon", Chloe Rosechu and BlazeBob Sonichu, so they wouldn't "burn with" her, not realizing that burning is an incredibly painful way to die.

More recently, Chris "dedicated" all of Sonichu #10 to PandaHalo's memory. This would be almost touching, if the alleged dedication didn't wholly consist of how awesome Chris was for using Panda's cover artwork.

Sarah May

After being called "Julie" multiple times, Sarah May attempted suicide over Mumble.[15] Immediately after she went offline, rather than express any concern or try to find a way to stop her, Chris told Julie (who was also in the chat), "I still have you," with a completely emotionless "oh well" attitude. Julie was playing along with Chris, and did not react to Sarah's suicide attempt in any human-like fashion either; yet, it did not occur to Chris that Julie's behavior was in any way unnatural. Chris then made an immature shout-out to her on a YouTube video, with tears faker than all his sweethearts combined. The only reason he offered as to why she shouldn't commit suicide was that he would be sad without her.

Ivy (1992–2009)

Ivy committed suicide after not being allowed to see Chris. Chris uploaded CWC "Boyfriend" as a memorial. Yes, a poorly-sung remake of Avril Lavigne's happy, bouncy pop-punk song, with lyrics changed to be about how much Chris would like women to date him. Chris included pictures of several past sweethearts in the video, making it less of a tribute to Ivy and more of a monument to Chris's failures.

Furthermore, as is unquestionably appropriate, Ivy's tragic demise was incorporated into issue #9. Rather than admit to having a hand in her suicide, Chris conjures up a magnificently gruesome accidental death, which involved having gotten her neck broken with elevator wires after falling through the elevator floor. Although this is a particularly troubling manipulation of what really happened, Chris more than makes up for it with gravitas; he gracefully, albeit belatedly, offers a tiny orange box in memory to Ivy 'O'Niel', taking pride of place underneath a backshot of Slaweel and some weird faux-Transformers actions. All of the above shows the leaps and bounds Chris has made in his appropriate handling of tragic deaths.

When confronted about this insanity in the Mailbag, Chris got quite indignant, demanding to know what the questioner thought he should have done, since Ivy had died in real life and could no longer serve as Chris's God-given sweetheart. It's not clear whether it had ever crossed Chris's mind to keep this horrific death out of the pages of what is supposedly a comic aimed at children, or to let Ivy's character live on in CWCville like he had done for Patti and BILLY.

Mary Jo (d. 2009)

In a mailbag, Chris was asked by a troubled fan what he should do after the death of his beloved Mary Jo.

Mary Jo is gone (I feel for you), but you should move on and try to find another woman who will treat you about as good, or possibly better than, her. Suck it up, and move on like a Man would. I tell you as a Man who had to do the same thing a few times in the past too.
Chris, being super-sensitive.

Chris clearly states how he believes a death should be approached by a man (which includes finding another woman right away and a specific lack of grieving), and tells the traumatized fan that he should simply move onto a better woman since his girlfriend's death, not only being completely asinine, but also outlining that he believes women to be replaceable and possibly interchangeable.

Tragedies

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Passengers of RMS Titanic (d. 1912)

In 1912, famous passenger liner Titanic hit an iceberg on its maiden voyage from Southampton, England to New York, and resulted in the deaths of around 1,600 people. In Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV, Chris insensitively attempts to threaten Lars by destroying a Lego version of the Titanic.

Every single victim of the World Trade Center attacks (d. 2001)

A Memory Card noting the tragedy, next to the Dark Arbok Pokémon card Chris had purchased on that day.

Chris has a very juvenile understanding of the September 11, 2001 terror attacks and their effect on world history. In the Twin Falling Towers video of 1 November 2009, Chris makes fun of Clyde Cash and says that he is as weak as the Twin Towers, which were primary targets in the 9/11 attacks. He then pretends that the mouse cursor is crashing into the buildings, complete with sound effects. After heavy criticism for turning a tragedy which killed 3,000 people into a childish joke, Chris apologized and insisted his patriotism. He also equated the death of Kacey's grandmother, who is said to have died in the attacks, to his dead dog. For literally no reason at all, the date of the attack is included in a time-travel sequence in Sonichu #7.

Yeardley Love (1987–2010)

Yeardley Love was a lacrosse player for UVA who was murdered. Chris uploaded a video discussing the story (which he probably just saw on television for a few minutes), but didn't even bother to say her name. He also stated that the murderer should get 20 years in prison for the shock of the murder, which is twice his desired punishment for smoking. Later in the video, he rerouted the subject towards himself and stated how everyone needed to be sympathetic of him and his autism and that he's not a bad man. In other words, he used the death of a girl he never knew in an attempt to make himself look good.

Victims of the November 2015 Paris terror attacks

In wake of the shootings and bombings in Paris on November 13, 2015, Chris responded on Facebook and expressed remorse in his own simple way, but equated the real-life atrocity which killed over 120 people with the actions of a "cartoon villain", suggesting he still has a poor grasp of the difference between reality and fantasy. Included was the image of Sonichu and Rosechu in front of the American flag in Sonichu #9.

Suicide

There are many problems that have caused some followers to worry that Chris may kill himself, to escape the pain of his incredibly miserable real life and go to CWCville forever:

  • Chris is almost 40 years old, with no real income, no savings, no qualifications, and a lot of debt.
  • Chris gets bullied and manipulated by weens on a regular basis, and his only friends exist in his imaginary world: Chris’s grasp on reality is so tenuous, that he now rejects offers of friendship from genuine people in favor of enablers, who play along with his beliefs before bailing out at first sign of trouble (such as the Teen Troon Squad).
  • Chris’s only real relative is Barb, who is nearly 80 years old and also deep in debt: with no confirmed plans by other family members to take Chris in, there are growing concerns that the mounting debt (worth over $155,000) could lead to the so-called "Homeless Saga" when Barb dies.
  • Chris has little to no chance of getting a job or a sweetheart, with over a decade of unsavory information about him on the internet, and weens and A-Logs who regularly try to get him banned or fired from every place that he visits or works.
  • Chris originally did not know about the CWCki, and therefore was unaware that all his sweethearts (such as Kim Wilson) were actually trolls: Chris actually considered suicide in October 2013, after discovering that past events and friends were nothing more than trolls or paid acquaintances.

However, there are a number of reasons why Chris still has a general interest in life, despite all the trouble that he went through:

  • Chris still gets positive publicity, such as Sonichu’s appearance in Sonic Rebuilt in March 2020: there are also "mainstream" observers like dodie and Harry Partridge, as well as those who just want to know how Chris crowbars CWCville and his characters into reality.
  • The Dimensional Merge, while semi-apocalyptic, is not a death cult like Jonestown: Chris believes that he can travel between dimensions without having to die. Furthermore, he believes that his imaginary world will teleport into the real world, and not the other way.
  • Although enablers have not been helpful to Chris’s already tenuous grasp on reality, many of them act like they care about him, to such an extent that they may have unwittingly discouraged Chris from kicking the bucket.
  • Actually committing suicide is not easy: hanging can be long and painful, slitting wrists can be very long and very painful, and it is not easy to acquire poison. It would also be very hard for Chris to obtain a firearm due to his mental health and criminal record.
  • In October 2013, Chris ruled out suicide, not only because of Barb and his pets, but also because of his belief (at the time) that suicide would leave him in Limbo.
  • In June 2018, when talking about the infamous line "Zap to the extreme", Chris said he literally feels electricity in his body, then states that he isn't killing himself.[16]

Dimension C-197 as Chris's version of Heaven

Following the Idea Guys saga, which affirmed to Chris his dimension beliefs, Chris began to think of alternate dimension C-197 as Heaven. He stated that he believes his deceased pets have reincarnated as characters[17] and that his father is "alive again".[18] He also stated that Marvel writer Stan Lee's soul had merged with his C-197 counterpart.[19]

So sure was Chris in this that he even tried to console a woman whose father passed away by telling her that her father's soul had likely gone to C-197.[20]

On 12 November 2018, with the advent of the death of famed comic legend Stan Lee, Chris stated that he merged with his Universe C-197 counterpart.

See also

References

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