Chris humps his PS3

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/v/'s reaction

Humpidy-Hump-Hump.

On 24th of July 2009, a video of Chris humping his beloved PS3 was leaked onto 4-cent_garbage's /v/. In it, Chris makes love to his "Life Upgrade" for eight minutes, although he can only stay standing for the first minute. What might at first seem to be just an impressive display of fanboyism is actually a desperate plea for the return of his international PlayStation Network accounts, seemingly being held to ransom by the expert hacker Jack Thaddeus.

Chris himself sat in on an IRC chat where a coterie of trolls planned the making of the video. (He believed that he had effectively hidden his identity from the trolls, but if you think Chris is actually that clever, well, you haven't read much of this wiki yet.) Bits of Chris's monologue are simply repetitions of what he heard during the chat.

It is recommended that only those with a heart level of over 50% watch this video; otherwise, its disturbing nature may be damaging to your health.

In his wisdom, Thaddeus deleted Chris's PSN accounts anyway.


Video

Chris humps his PS3
Stardate 24 July 2009
Subject Matter SexSex Sex, Video gamesVideo games PS3
Performance Style ComedyComedy Comedy
Shirt BlueTshirt.png Blue T-Shirt
Other LeakedLeaked Leaked
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
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CWC "Boyfriend"


Transcript

Statistics
RankS.jpg
Damn Count 42
Fuck Count 21
Give (X) Count 23
Jack Thaddeus Count 17
Number of Humps 1173
Avg. Humps Per Second 2.23

(A lot of grunting.)

Oh, damn you Sack Thaddic—Jack Thaddeus, give me back my PlayStation Network accounts. I'm so damn stupid. I've got a goddamn motherfucking six-inch cock with four-inch di-a-me-ter BAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWLLLS. I hope you—

Give me back my PlayStation Network accounts. Give them back to me, begging you, humping nearly on motherfucking knees. You are so ...damn. This is the worst of...blackmail. Give me back my PlayStation Network accounts. All five of those out-of-country accounts.

I don't know if I could do this any better. But I'm doing this damn, damn, damn motherfucking hump! Heavy, heavy, heavy, heavy, heavy, heavy, motherfucking heavy, motherfucking heavy, heavy, heavy, heavy, like a woman, with heavy-weight body type and damn G-cup breasts. It's a torture. It's a pain.

Making me have to do this for eight damn minutes. So, damn. Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn, damn, damn. Jack Thaddeus! Jack Thaddeus! Jack Thaddeus! Jack motherfucking Thaddeus! Give me back my PlayStation Network accounts and hold up your end of the bargain like you promised and leave me the motherfucking alone. Go bother somebody else you damn...

(panting)

Jack Thaddeus! Jack Thaddeus! Jack Thaddeus! Give me back my PlayStation Networks accounts, you expert hacker! You, you ir—rational expert! Motherfucking burning-in-hell hacker! I don't even know how you even got the damn information about those five in the motherfucking first place! Jack Thaddeus, give me back my PlayStation Network accounts!

This hurts! Oh this hurts! Oh this motherfucking hurts... motherfucking hurts. Give me back my PlayStation Network accounts. Oh, and some motherfucking master of obvious social inquiries with damn drug deals, damn cocaine, got a family somewhere, someway or another, Alex being one of your damn relatives somehow, no idea, but give me back my PlayStation Network accounts, motherfucking idiots. This really is a pain! It hurts, it hurts. Hey guys, dang, dang, this so motherfucking heavy.

I love PlayStation! I love PlayStation! Kill the Xbox! New reason why they call it the motherfucking 360, you look at it makes you turn around— makes you do a 360° and walk away. Very appropriately called is a damn 120°, 130° whatever, whatever the half of 360° is. Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn! Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn! Jack Thaddeus! Give me back my PlayStation Network accounts. I love PlayStation. Sony reigns, Sony will reign in the console wars. No matter who argues. Fuck the 350—360 fanatics. Fuck them all to hell. Shot to hell. Damn them all. What the fuck. They're all motherfucking idiots. What the fuck. Damn, damn, damn, damn. Jack Thaddeus! Jack Thaddeus! Give me back my PlayStation Network accounts. All five of those... out of... United States of America accounts.

Give 'em all back. Give 'em all back. Give 'em. Give 'em all back. Give 'em. Give 'em. Give 'em. Give 'em. Give 'em. Give 'em. Give 'em back. Jack Thaddeus, motherfuckin' bastard. Think you're so, oh yeah, you so tough. You think you man. Some day you're gonna fall. You're gonna fall and God help you when you fall. You'll be down to hell, but I guess you don't care 'bout that. You're just a motherfucking prince of hacking and torturing. Give me back my PlayStation Network accounts, you Jack Thaddeus. Jack Thaddeus. Jack Thaddeus! Give me back my motherfucking PlayStation Network accounts. Hey hey, yeah yeah, I don't like your boyfriends. No way, no way. Girl, I think you need a new one. Hey hey, yeah yeah, girl, woman, I could be your boyfriend. 'Cause I am damn straight. Uh, damn rumors on the Internet from damn trolls make a mockery outta me and everything I do. That's drawn me down to quit drawing 'cause I lost motherfucking inspiration. Uh, damn, Jack Thaddeus give me back my PlayStation Network accounts.

Fan videos

Chris screws his Playstation
Stardate 05 November 2009
Made By ujustgotpwned2008
Subject Matter Porn remix
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


WELCOME TO THE INTERNET
Stardate 05 November 2009
Made By ujustgotpwned2008
Subject Matter Still Alive remix
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos

See also

External links

Cwc dare Chris's videos CWC "Boyfriend"
Videos for trolls

Clyde Cash: Plea to Clyde | Chris Comes Out of the Closet | Vibrator destruction video | The proof | BACK THE FUCK OFF | Secret Weapon | Take that Page DOWN NOW! | YouTube Finale | A CWC Audition | Chris Calls Clyde Out | Sign destruction video | Clyde Cash the kid video | Challenge for Clyde | Challenge for Clyde II | Chris loses it | War paint video | Response to Gregg | To Clyde Gregg | ClydeGoingOnGregg1 | Clyde's Buddy Matt Getting SUPER-LAID!!! | Clyde is Weaker than Water | Getting Foam Ed | I AM STRONG | Twin Falling Towers | It will never end | Apology for doing WTC | No More Jokes | To Clyde and Jack | Don't Mess With Me | I am Clyde Cash | Chris has no creativity | Chris "executes" Clyde

Other trolls: We're Being Watched | Naïve YouTubers | A near public apology | Rollin' and Trollin' | CWC Trollin More | It's UGH! | Chris humps his PS3 | THAT IS MY HOUSE | Forgiveness Blessings | Curse the Trolls | Ultimatum for Vivian | Chris dispels videogame rumors | To Clyde and Jack | Multiple challenge | Asperchu fury | Surfshack Tito | A message to the Trolls | Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots! | Chris Drops the N-Bomb | I Pimp My Ride | Chris tells the trolls | Sonichu copyrights | Stardate, August 27, 2010 | ItIsFinished | Anti Troll Movement Video1 | Don't make the Grimace sad | I am Alec Benson Leary | Calling Out videos | Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada

Lady Managers: Doxing Jeff/Francine | Thank You, Jeff, and I accept your apology. | Update 1/17/2016 | Jeff is Beyond Denounced.

Idea Guys: Freestyle Dance With Me, For Our World! | Cherokean Chant | Smashing | Get Out, You D*** Nazis! | Tour of Chris's House III | Chris apologizes to Gwen | Chris slaps himself | Dick Licker; that is I. | One-Hundred! | Chris pleads to stop Cryzel Torture‎ | All Star | Chris lost Crystal | I’m Sorry for Ruining so many Fandoms