List of things Chris has shoved up his ass

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As for what turned me onto the idea was watching women doing it for themselves in some of the porn I watched. I tried it myself with just my fingers, and it felt alright to me, especially recently.
Chris explaining the origins of his anal fixation


Christian Weston Chandler has shoved many things up his ass for sexual pleasure (and in one instance, because he was being "blackmailed"). Many adults, even STRAIGHT adults, have done this, and it isn't necessarily a weird thing, but in Chris's case it's particularly funny because he happens to be an insanely homophobic Virgin with Rage. For a long time Chris repeatedly denied ever committing such heinous, homoerotic acts, but eventually all it took was a few trusted gal-pals for him to confidentially reveal the True and Honest graphic details of his anal experiences.

Even though he already has fecal incontinence, one can only imagine what wonders this does for his DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS.


This list only covers what Chris has admitted shoving up his ass. Given that he was hesitant to admit this much, out of fear that he will be misinterpreted as a homo, we can only imagine what items he has experimented with that he's too ashamed to confess.

Things Chris has shoved up his ass

  • Dildo (with a condom on, later destroyed in an attempt to prove his straightness)[1]
  • Anal beads (ended up "covered in poo" and thrown away because Chris didn't understand how they work)[2]
  • Sonichu Medallion (broken into pieces first, done under duress because a 13 year-old told him to)[3]
  • His fingers (unlike with the other things he shoved up there, Chris actually admitted that this "felt alright", and it appears to now be his preferred method of anal stimulation)[4]

Things Chris is willing to shove up his ass for his true love

  • A fake dick ("I would take that in for her.")[5]
  • Strap-on dildo (as long as it's NOT dick-shaped because that would be gay)[6]

What does the future hold for Christian's anus?

Will shoving so many things up his ass cause some kind of damage to his sphincter or have any kind of negative effect on the functionality of his asshole? Only time will tell...



Sauces