Man in the Pickle Suit
|“||The Pickle Man tricked me again.||”|
|Christian Weston Chandler|
Owner of the CWCki
The Man in the Pickle Suit (now referred to as Marvin and sometimes referred to as the Black Man in the Pickle Suit) was the arch-nemesis of Chris whom he used to blame whenever he was tricked or conned. In 2009, the role of the Man in the Pickle Suit was adopted by Marvin, who is often referred to as the Jew in the Pickle Suit.
The character was first created on 11 September 2008 by a troll posing as Blanca. Using a fake MySpace page, they claimed that Blanca was in fact a black transvestite in a pickle costume. This lead to Chris believing that the pictured Man in the Pickle Suit was in fact a real person. Because the persona was entirely fictional, the character quickly became anonymized by trolls, with multiple people operating under the name at once.
Even though Chris turns basically everyone that annoys him into a villain in his comic, the Man in the Pickle Suit has surprisingly been spared. The closest he got to featuring as an enemy was when "Cly" fought Chris using a "pickle gun".
|“||I don't know who that guy is and I don’t think I really would care to know.||”|
|Chris on the Man in the Pickle Suit - Christian Weston Chandler Interview|
Midway through August 2008, a troll on Encyclopedia Dramatica by the name of Lordsillynipples created a profile posing Blanca under the name "kawaiikitsune123". The troll successfully tricked Chris into believing he was speaking to the "real" Blanca, and solicited nudes of him wearing his mother's bra and underwear. On 11 September 2008, the troll revealed himself, leaking Chris' nudes onto Encyclopedia Dramatica and taunting Chris by stating they were a black pickle-suited transvestite.
Jew in the Pickle Suit
While many operated under the moniker, by far the most notorious individual was the Jew in the Pickle Suit, also known as Marvin. Although Marvin has long-since stopped operating under the Man in the Pickle Suit name, he is still active on Kiwi Farms, and is the current owner of the CWCki. He played a significant role in dismantling both Chris' Night Star persona in 2017 and the Idea Guys in 2018.
On 15 March 2009, Marvin accompanied Robert Simmons V to his visit to Christian's church. Four days later, he rescued Emily from a horrific first date with Chris IRL. Whilst Emily and Chris were chatting it up and walking around the mall, Marvin emerged from the shadows dressed in a pickle suit, and began flirting with Emily. He ultimately won her over, stealing her from Chris, who stood dumbfounded, unable to cope with the defeat he had just suffered.
In October 2009, the Jew in the Pickle Suit established a YouTube account that suggested he had come out of retirement one last time to deal a final, crushing blow upon the manchild. Despite his promise that Chris would never complete his Fuck Quest, Chris ended up losing his virginity in 2012.
|A Message to Chris Chan. From an old friend.|
|Stardate||23 April 2010|
|Made By||I Am The Internet Pickle Man|
|TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos|
Marvin: It's been a long time, Chris... (pause) Marvin: I'll cut right to the chase. I'll tell you why I'm here. Marvin: You see, I've had enough. Everyone has had enough. Marvin: No more.. of you.. and your "dates".. and your "e-mails"... Marvin: No more "sweetheart searches".. No more nothing. Marvin: I'm here to put a stop to it. You see.. Marvin: Your virginity is my business. And mine to control. Marvin: Not yours. Allow me to... clue you in on the plan I've had for a while now. Marvin: You see.. I went out at night into the streets of Virginia. Marvin: There, I found every prostitute and hooker I could find.. and do you know what I did?? Marvin: I found each and every one of them, and I told them.. (pause) Marvin: I have your mugshot. If you see this man, give him nothing. He deserves nothing. Marvin: You see, I spread these out. They know you before they even approach. Marvin: So you see, Chris... I have all the cards. And you're just going to have to play with whatever hand.. Marvin: I deal to you.
- 11 September 2008: Captain's Log, Stardate September 11th, 2008 - Chris is first trolled by the Pickle Man.
- 21 October 2008: Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008 - Chris crashes into slumber after the Pickle Man breaks up his relationship with Blanca.
- 17 March 2010: Chris Drops the N-Bomb - Chris accuses Surfshack Tito of being a "pickle-suited nigger".
The Man in the Pickle Suit is an ancient title passed on from one troll to another. In this lost scene from the Bayeux Tapestry, Geoffrey Weston the Feeble-Minded (a possible early ancestor to Daniel Weston) is tricked by "The Man Donning the Pickled Cucumber Suit".
Response to the Sonic Boom Protests.
- The Man in the Pickle Suit on MySpace
- The Man in the Pickle Suit on Facebook
- The Man in the Pickle Suit on Twitter