Medallions

From CWCki
Jump to navigation Jump to search
And we're rubbing each others sides and backs with our hands, our mouths are busy, and after a moment, you take off your blouse, and I take off my shirt, optionally with the medallion on
Chris, describing his sex fantasy to PandaHalo[1]
Oh yes he fucking did.
Top to bottom: The Good, the Bad, the Ugly. Left to right: The decoy Sonichu medallion, the Jiggliami medallion, the Rosechu medallion, and the Blake medallion.

Christian Weston Chandler loves his original character Sonichu so much that he sometimes wears a handmade Sonichu medallion on his neck. In public. He also calls them "medals".[2][3][4][5]

The Sonichu medallion, along with his trademark striped shirt, is perhaps his most famous characteristic. Over the years, Chris has produced numerous medallions of his Electric Hedgehog Pokémon characters. They're made from Crayola fuckin' Model Magic and acrylic paint.

Origins and purpose

Like anything else Chris holds dear, it also comes in card form.
The earliest known photo of Chris with the medallion, from 24 February 2004, Chris's 22nd birthday. The medallion is in profile, with Shrinky Dinks hanging from its chain.
An art project that may have provided inspiration.

Though Chris previously could not recall when he first made the medallion, in August 2009, Chris finally recalled the origins of the medallion. From CWCipedia:[6]

Then Late 2000, I bought some Crayola Model Magic Clay, and I molded and crafted the First Original Sonichu Medallion that I wore around my neck with a makeshift chain (which I later replaced with a better necklace I bought from Pacific Sunwear at my Mall). Sadly, the First Original was mistrusted with a feindish individual in 2008, I recrafted the Medal and continued on (The Necklace Still Holds ALL the History of the Medallions). THERE IS CURRENTLY ONLY ONE Original, True Sonichu Medallion, and it is NOT MADE FROM PAPER cheaply, NOT MANUFACTURED IN A FACTORY from Plastic or Metal (yet); IT IS MADE FROM CRAYOLA MODLE MAGIC CLAY, with my Permanent Ink Signature, Copyright Note, Circle of Originality, and Two Custom Shrinkie-Dink Charms of Sonichu and an S-Chu Ball.

Despite being allegedly created in March 2000, the earliest known photograph of Chris wearing a Sonichu medallion is from his twenty-second birthday, 24 February 2004. In his "So Need a Cute Girl" video (20 December 2004) he feels it necessary to explain what it is, suggesting that it is still a relatively new feature.

In a Mumble chat on 10 February 2009, Chris revealed the reason for the medallion and that is... because he wanted to. It's "like a nametag" for him.[7] In one of his ED edits, Chris says that his medallion "identifies him for the high-funcioning [sic] Autistic individual that he is."[8] And man, it sure does. It has also been speculated there could be other reasons for wearing his medallion, which range from simply thinking Sonichu is SERIOUS BUSINESS, to being a portable anchor in our dangerous real world to CWCville, his own happy world where he's always the hero who saves the day.

Chris is somewhat aware that the medallions make him look like a crazy person: he reassured Kacey that he didn't wear one to his job interview at Target (of course, this interview almost certainly did not take place, but Chris was at least aware that wearing a yellow hedgehog's head around your neck is not socially normal).[9]

Each medallion is constructed from Crayola Fuckin' Model Magic, a non-toxic, easy-to-use modeling clay intended for small children. Chris wedges a keyring into the edge of each medallion, from which he can attach a chain to go around his neck. Sometimes he wears a Wilson wristband on top of it because, being autistic, he mostly likely has sensory defensiveness, which might render the sensation of the chain's links uncomfortable. Medallions are painted with acrylic paint in the color schemes of the characters they represent, with copyright information scrawled on the back. Additional detailing varies, but Chris is known to have applied Shrinky Dink charms to certain medallions as a form of authentication, to prevent counterfeiting.

The medallions

Sonichu medallion

Chris even wore it at his goddamn college graduation.
Before Blanca, it was believed that the Medallion of Fail would corrupt its possessor, turning him into an autistic manchild with a poor taste in fashion.

Chris's primary medal is his Sonichu medallion, which he has rarely been seen without for the past five years. This medallion of course depicts his main character, Sonichu. Within the canon of Chris's Sonichu comics, the medallion is the source of the Anchuent powers that allow Chris to assume his Electric Hedgehog alter ego, Chris-Chan Sonichu.

As he explained to Shigeru Miyamoto in his business proposal, the medallion gives him no special powers in real life.

Chris has repeatedly claimed that in order for it to be a TRUE and HONEST video, it will be of him wearing the medallion. In this manner, he attempted to cast doubt on the videos he posted confessing homosexuality, since he was not wearing his medallion in that footage.


Prototype

He was also wearing a makeshift necklace that has a large plastic medallion in the shape of a Pokeman [sic] characters [sic] head. He also had a number of shrinky dink decorations attached to this necklace.
Psychiatrist describing the prototype Medallion of Fail.[10]
Earliest known version of the medallion.
Computer rendering. This required over 9,000 hours in MS Paint, as well as an associates degree in CAD/CAM.

It appears that the very first medallion Chris created is the one seen to the right, which Chris was photographed wearing sporadically in 2004. This design is definitely cruder than the others, with a pale yellow hue suggesting Chris was still learning how to properly apply color in this medium. This version is always seen on a metal chain, accompanied by Shrinky Dinks of a "CWC" logo, Sonichu, Rosechu, and the Chaotic Combo.

Chris wore this medallion as late as May 2004, when he brought it with him to the Anime Mid-Atlantic convention that year. He would also wear this medallion later in the year, when he received a psychiatric survey.

Mark 1 (and decoy)

Spoiler: He even wears it during his sex fantasies.
The decoy medallion.
The SPECIAL SYMBOLS to identify the TRUE and HONEST medallion.
Chris's supposed reaction to the destruction of his medallion (artist's depiction).

By June 2005 Chris had begun to wear what appeared to have been a new medallion. While Chris has claimed that the Sonichu medallion he sent to Blanca was the very first one he made,[6] Mark 1 is clearly different from the prototype in that its tufts of fur on the sides of Sonichu's face were less pronounced and that it had a better paint job. There are no Shrinky Dinks to go with it, and instead of a chain it hangs from some sort of beaded necklace. The appearance of this version in pictures and videos seems to correspond with the introduction of Chris's red-and-blue striped shirts. This may be the medallion he was wearing in the 20 Dec 2004 video. It is definitely the medallion he wore to the 2005 Anime Mid-Atlantic convention.

No one is sure how many medallions Chris wore between 2005 and 2008, but in all pictures they appear roughly the same as this design. Sonichu's face has eyebrows in some photos and not in others, so either Chris was repainting the same medallion or making new ones. 4chan and ED are filled with high-functioning autistics who have pored over photographs identifying subtle differences in the medal's "ears" and "cheeks", without arriving at a consensus. For the sake of clarity, this article will assume that this was Chris's only medallion during this period.

In August 2008, an anon on /v/ offered a story and photograph suggesting that he had met Chris in real life and tricked him into giving the medallion to him. However, anon aspies all immediately analyzed the details of dozens of pictures and determined the "stolen" medallion to be a forgery. This conclusion was reaffirmed when Chris himself decided to post a video announcing that the medallion had never been stolen, defiantly claiming that nobody would take it from him. He also denied it in the Christian Weston Chandler Interview.

Chris claimed to have made multiple Sonichu medallions and that he would sometimes wear these decoys to frustrate attempts to steal the one true medallion. It would remain unclear whether he was bluffing until October 2008 when the team of trolls posing as Blanca Weiss tricked him into sending all of his medallions to them. The package they received contained no fewer than two yellow Sonichu medals: one with the special markings identifying it as the "real" one, and another with no markings. It may be assumed that these were the only two medallions he owned at that time. Neither of them was the prototype, however, and that one's fate is unclear.

A video that showed the destruction of the medallion was eventually uploaded to YouTube. Chris responded by crashing into slumber. Its remains are currently locked in a box somewhere at Miskatonic University. As for the decoy Sonichu medallion, it ultimately ended up in the possession of Encyclopedia Dramatica's owner/webmaster, Girlvynl.



Mark 2

It identifies him for the high-functioning autistic individual that he is

After sending the medallions to Blanca, and being told by Blanca that trolls had stolen them from "her," Chris created a new Sonichu medallion with a slightly larger design. He posted a video explaining that Blanca had recovered the original one and sent it back to him, and that he had modified it. This new medallion boasted a special peg on the reverse side which could be used to hold Chris's high school ring, which somehow made it copy-protected.

Assuming Chris did not create any backup medallions, this is the same one he wore while posing in his mother's underwear at the request of trolls posing as Blanca. During this same exchange he later ejaculated onto the medal. Shortly thereafter Chris posted a new video in which he is visibly not wearing the medallion. It's unclear if he replaced this soiled medallion or if he cleaned it; in either case he was wearing it (or a similar duplicate) again by 27 October.

On 3 March 2009, Max coerced Chris into cutting his medallion into pieces and shoving those pieces up his rectum. The idea of Chris literally inserting these chunks of ceramic into his rectum (and therefore risking anal tearing and sepsis) was highly controversial. Some have argued that he merely placed them between his buttcheeks (either in an attempt to deceive Max or out of ignorance of how to get them past his sphincter), but in any case, the remnants of the medallion were assuredly covered in fecal matter. Whatever happened, Chris thinks that his father would "have another heart attack" if he knew the details.

Mark 3

Oh God, the taste...
The first formal appearance of the Mark 3 medallion. It's like The Blair Witch Project, but only a few seconds long and the entire budget (and then some) spent on the crap on the background

Although Chris claimed that he was making a new medallion, he didn't wear any medal in his YouTube videos between the 3 March 2009 incident and his 1 July 2009 videos. During this period he argued that his high school ring may be accepted as a symbol of his truthiness. However, since this statement was made without the medallion, this was false and Chris disproved himself.

In photos released 17 April 2009 of Chris in some butt garments, the new medallion, Mark 3, is shown as Chris licks it in a sensuous fashion. The release of these images proved doubly hurtful for Chris, not only for showing him, a shell of a manchild, in diapers but even worse in that it confirmed that there is a new Medallion that can either be seized and/or shoved up his rectum.

Despite the fact that he had made a new medallion, Chris was for some time reluctant to wear it in his videos, allegedly out of the fear that trolls would start a new campaign to seize the medallion and/or shove it up his rectum.

On 22 May 2009 this medallion made a surprise cameo in Christian's newest video. During the update, the video randomly cuts to the medallion hanging from the ceiling, only to cut back to Chris seconds afterward, presumably to add extra validity to the statements made in Chris's video.

The 1 July 2009 videos mark the full return of the Medallion of Fail, as Chris wears the third medallion around his neck throughout both videos.

As of now the medallion remains hung on his wall, as seen in a video.

CWC enthusiasts can look forward to Chris voluntarily surrendering the medallion to thieves and/or willingly shoving it up his rectum in the near future.

Rosechu medallion

A gift for his beloved sister-wife
Close-up

Only one medallion of Sonichu's sweetheart Rosechu is known to have existed, but it is speculated to be the first one Chris fashioned after the Sonichu one. The Rosechu medallion was intended to be worn by Chris's future heartsweet, the one who would be his true love and bear him his God-called daughter. Chris has never been seen wearing it himself. It was sent with the others to Blanca in October 2008.

The medallion was first revealed to the Internet in the pages of Sonichu #4, where Chris's imaginary twin sister Crystal was introduced wearing it. In the comics Crystal possesses the same anchuent powers as Chris and the Rosechu medallion therefore allows her to become Crystalina Rosechu. That a real Rosechu medal existed was not learned until later, when Chris revealed it to PandaHalo.

In case it hadn't occurred to you yet: Chris did, in real life, make a medal to be awarded to the future mother of his children, and in his fantasy world he has affixed this same medal to the twin sister he created to explore what he would be like if he'd been born female. Freud would doubtlessly have some choice words to say about this.


Black Sonichu medallion

He's too angry to show his fangs
Close-up

Although Black Sonichu (now Blake) seems to have originally served as an analogue for Wes Iseli,[11] Chris uses the Black Sonichu medallion to represent his own dark side, as he himself admits.[12] The picture at the left speaks volumes about its significance; Chris seems to believe that if he scowls hard enough and wears the evil medallion, then whoever he's angry with will be terrified into capitulation, such as when he wore it in a video aimed at Adam Stackhouse.

The Anchuent Prophecy in the comics foretells that the Black Sonichu medallion would be created as a dark reflection of the original, yellow Sonichu medallion Chris wears. Beginning with Sonichu #6, Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc began wearing the dark medal and acting as Christian's evil twin, following the urges Chris himself keeps bottled up inside him. Like Christian, Naitsirhc summons powers from his medallion to become Reldnahc Ha-Taque.

Naitsirhc's medallion notwithstanding, Black Sonichu's role as the symbol of pure evil has softened in recent years as Chris has allowed the character to soften and fall in love with Bubbles Rosechu. As such the actual Black Sonichu medallion was rarely seen until it was sent to Blanca in October 2008.

Jiggliami medallion

Despite the purpose of the Rosechu medallion, Chris was so in love with Blanca that he created a brand-new medallion for her to wear based on Blanca's original character Jiggliami. This medallion was sent along with the others to Blanca in October 2008. Blanca was depicted wearing this medallion in Sonichu #7 and #8. It was sent to the now-former admin of the /cwc/ imageboard and currently resides in a holding facility somewhere in California.

It is the simplest of the medallions, being a plain circle with no three-dimensional pieces. Consequently, it's probably the least hideous of the medallions, as Chris has limited the number of ways he can fail by giving himself less work to do.

Asperchu Medallion

The Medallion of Win in all its glory

In one video, Chris's mysterious friend is seen sporting an odd medallion. In another video a few days later, the medallion was confirmed to be one of Asperchu. Apparently, it was crafted by Alec Benson Leary and given to Chris as a symbol of goodwill. In that video, Chris is pained to have the medallion around and have it hung up on his wall. The medal is still hanging on his wall to this day, covered by the box Alec sent it in so Chris doesn't get stressed by having to look at it. The box was seen hanging open in the Tomgirl Pictures: what this means is best not thought about.

Chris wears the medallion while impersonating Alec Benson Leary in his video 100 2270.

Obtaining medallions

Since the discovery of Chris on 4chan and Encyclopedia Dramatica, it had been understood among trolls that the Sonichu medallion was Chris's most cherished possession and that he would cry like a bitch if it were ever taken from him, making its capture a prime objective. This proved only partially true when it was inevitably stolen. Chris does not seem to have a special attachment to any one particular medallion, but merely his ability to always wear one at all times. Further, all successful efforts to eliminate the medallions have resulted in relatively little outrage; Chris is always more concerned with his Internet girlfriends being fake than he is over losing his property because of them. Currently, there are only 2 medallions that have not been obtained by trolls or shoved up Chris's ass.

Medallions obtained by Blanca Weiss

  • Sonichu v.1
  • Sonichu Decoy
  • Rosechu
  • Black Sonichu
  • Jiggliami



Destroyed Medallions

  • Sonichu v.2

Medallions Still in Chris's Possession

  • Sonichu v.3
  • Asperchu

Gone forever?

Last appearance, 11 November 2010.

Chris was believed to have abandoned his medallions in 2010, but then was seen wearing one on 6 September 2010 in Haters gonna hate.mov. He also wore the Sonichu medallion in a photo dated 11 November 2010 (leaked on 13 May 2012). However, the medallion has not been seen since Chris started wearing his "Tomgirl" attire (failing to appear in either the original Tomgirl Pictures or the Calling Out videos), suggesting that at the very least Chris wears it much less than he used to do, or possibly that the medallion has finally checked out for good.

See also

Sources