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==Chris and Remorse==
== Chris and Patriotisim! ==


Yeah, you're on to something interesting here.  The pattern of long-winded explanations in his apologies is clear -- see also his excruciating descriptions of sex acts for Megan back in the day.  One of the crucial components of a good self-delusion is the belief that everyone else thinks exactly like you do, or would if you just had the chance to explain things... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 18:50, 3 November 2009 (CET)
Champthom says it can't be done.  He's probably right, but I'm gonna tool around with it anyway.  There's not a lot that can be said about Chris's nonexistent politics, but does have a lot of very strange views on how the US operates that might make an interesting read if done properly.


Good so far.  I think a key component of his "remorse" is that, over and over again, he's really just sorry that he got caught. This is very similar to the behavior of small children, who often fail to understand the difference between the mechanistic action-and-reward system of apologizing and averting trouble, and genuinely regretting a past error. Yet another example of the fact that Chris's only real problem is that he sees the world through the eyes of a five-year-old. Pretty much all of his fucked-up misadventures can be traced back to that.
Also, why is my sandbox talkpage so long?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 15:55, 16 April 2010 (UTC)
[[User:Sygerrik|Sygerrik]] 20:16, 3 November 2009 (CET)
:I think the possible patriotism article could include a section on Thomas Jefferson, as a particularly hilarious segment of Sonichu 10 had Magi-Chan standing in front of an American flag wondering what Thomas Jefferson would think of the Asperpedia people.[[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 21:30, 16 April 2010 (UTC)
::Another thing, Chris also has weird views on other countries as well. His war paint video, kilt video, and Christian Love Day video belie his cultural ignorance. That seems to be a theme in his "patriotism." He thinks that invoking a patriotic sentiment gives credence to his position, even when he doesn't know anything about the culture or country he is invoking. [[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 21:33, 16 April 2010 (UTC)
I'm trying to keep speculation to a minimum here, but the line about how Chris would have been shot or put to work in a camp gets to me a little bit.  To the best of my knowledge, any stable, developed nation (The US, Canada, The vast Majority of Europe, Japan, Australia, essentially anywhere with a stable government, good infrastructure, and without massive amounts of poverty,) Chris would likely grow up to be very similar to the way he is now.  Giant useless manbabys exist in pretty much every nation where daily life isn't a grave hardship.


==Chris's Closed Mind==
Had he been born in a developing, war-torn, or otherwise miserable nation, I figure there's two distinct possiblities.  One would be that he wouldn't have survived past Childhood, either because his autisim caused him to wander into a dangerous situation, or because the way he acted put others at risk.  The second is that the constant Hardship would beat the laziness out of him, and he would become much like every other person growing up there.


I like what you're putting together.  I was actually starting to write up an article intended to be something like, "Chris and Hypocrisy," to discuss all the things Chris does and is okay with, but then turns around and condemns others for doing the same things.  I hadn't gotten far, but I'd planned to touch on some of the same things you're discussing here.  [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 06:53, 3 December 2009 (CET)
That said, this is all useless speculation.  I'm just typing all this as I try to find a way to say Chris is lucky he's an american without inviting a thousand edits claiming that he's as he is BECAUSE he's American.  It's a factor, sure, but I don't think he'd be significantly different had he been born in Bristol England or Auckland New Zeland.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 19:02, 2 May 2010 (UTC)
:Chris and Hypocrisy is awesome, so I'm just gonna see if I can incorporate what I've written here into it.  It's entirely possible however that taking that action would just make Chris and Hypocricy LESS awesome, so I might just delete this altogether.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 01:58, 14 December 2009 (CET)


==Asperchu==
I think even the stars & bars flag would be inaccurate; sure he's a bigoted redneck but even they find his views extreme (CWCville would hardly be the best example of "states rights"). Would a swastika be invoking Godwin's law too much? Or maybe a Soviet or Chinese flag, I don't know, something to reflect his totalitarian views. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 20:30, 2 May 2010 (UTC)
If we have a main namespace article, this should really be called "Asperchu." We're more interested in what actually is invoking Chris's rage and not the guy himself. Instead, what I suggest is we have an Asperchu article which is somewhat along the lines of what you're going at here (documenting the relationship between Chris and Asperchu) while maintaining the Fan page where readers can read more about specifics of Asperchu (characters, plots, etc.). --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:08, 11 January 2010 (UTC)
:Asperchu already redirects to Fan:Asperchu.  I figured that since Chris was screaming for Alec's death, that made him a notable troll.  Still, I guess I can tweak it a little bit to be about Asperchu instead of Alec.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:29, 11 January 2010 (UTC)
::I really like the page so far, though Champthom is right that it should be focused on Asperchu first and Alec second. [[User:ALBASPERCHU|ALBASPERCHU]] 10:30, 11 January 2010 (CST)
:::When the man himself tells you to rewrite it, I fucking rewrite it!  This shouldn't take long.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 16:42, 11 January 2010 (UTC)
==Your observations on Wild==


You're exactly right.  Chris cares about Wild's opinion because he thinks Wild has a personality.  Remember, he thinks Bubbles has a "caring, but stern" personality when she is in fact utterly one dimensional.  Same with all of the Rosechus and it's not a far cry that the Sonichus suffer the same fate. He doesn't have to ''show'' us their personalities because he already knows that, so we should as well.  Chris is, after all, the guy who expected us to know what he dreams about.
===CHRIS AND AMERICA IN AMERICA FOR AMERICA FUCK YEAH===
Now we can cover all of Chris's stupid-ass ideas on the nation in one place. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 16:01, 3 May 2010 (UTC)


Chris doesn't want to off Simonla because then he'd fear that Wild would come after him(Kind of like Xent's Magi-chan fic), and he'd have to kill Wild too.  Then the Combo might try to kill him for murdering their leader, and he'll have to kill them and all of their satellite characters.  Reginald, Layla, Blake, Silvana...then Sonichu would protest the murder of his friends and attack Chris, so he'd have to kill him.  And then Chris will have made Rosechu a widow, and he'll have to kill her, as Crystal was not a Pokemon in the dream and Rosechu cannot be his sweetheart.  And then he'll have to kill her kids so they won't be orphans, thus offing Crystal.
== THE PRESIDENT ==


Tl;dr, if he kills Simonla he'll go on a murderous rampage and eventually kill the Sweetheart Sue and the Crystal Sue.
I think you should add how his opinion of the president usually waffles depending on who's in office. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 17:38, 6 May 2010 (UTC)


*A little far fetched, but I think that its a good idea to try and cause something similar ourselves. What if we didn't stop at Simonla though? What if we took something precious to Chris and blackmailed him with it? What if we go beyond Evan's forcing him to kill Simonla and just force him to destroy the entire fucking town? There goes his safe haven, and then he'll be forced to face the real world. I propose a vote. All in favour of nuking CWCVille say Aye. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:26, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
==Okay, so the actual patriotism part now==
This article is probably the most I've ever agonized over stuff I've written for this site.  I just want it to be good.  Right now though Just trying to get some sort of outline down here.


*That would be nice, but what hurts Chris more?  Knowing that his safe haven is now a radioactive husk(the Sonees were in the "horrible death by radiation" zone and shat out their innards), or knowing that if he goes to his safe haven, Wild will be there to accuse him of murder?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 20:32, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
'''How Chris Views His Country'''


*I don't know. We are assuming a lot about Chris with the whole 'Wild will be against him thing'. He thinks they are real, sure, but he still has god like power of them, and he still dictates what their personalities are. How do we know that he won't just imagine Wild as forgiving him for it because he was blackmailed? Now if no one was alive to forgive him on the other hand, then he'd feel some kind of guilt, and no one would be able to tell him that its all ok. Beacuse, everyone will die painful deaths. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 02:23, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
GOD
** Let's put it this way--Chris once had to take Ivy and Panda out of the comic and his first reaction was "KILL THEM BOTH". Chris was confronted with bullshit accusations of Rosechu being a former male Raichu and his first thought was "QUICK, LIE YOUR WAY OUT".  He'll never pick the most rational approach to anything, and despite his godlike power/allies he's very bad at using it to his advantage in situations where they really would have helped.  There are at least three things he can do to fix this and he can't think to do any of them.
*Chris views the US government, law enforcement agencies with much the same attitude he views God.  I am ''not'' saying that Chris thinks of the US as god, merely that he applies the same Chris-logic to them.
 
:*He doesn't really understand how either of them work, and he has made no effort to learn anything about them.
1.  Kill Simonla and magic Wild into moving on.
:*He completely ignores both of them until it is convenient for him.
2.  Use the reboot as an excuse to replace her with a new character(He doesn't even need to think of one, the mailbags gave him three Rosechu OCs and there are more on DA).
:*He expects both to protect/look out for him, even though he ignores them the rest of the time.
3.  Have her evolve into another character entirely--Pokemon cannon can justify total personality and appearance changes and Hobo Chris could use his powers to make everyone think she was always like this.
:*He expects both to go out of their way to help him, often at the expense of everybody else.
 
:*He expects both to take a personal interest in the immediate destruction of his enemies.
Chris is too stupid to just make Wild move on and as with everything else uses his "pure gold on first try" approach.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 03:18, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
:*He is completely ungrateful for the bounty both have provided him.
 
*Again, I am not saying that Chris somehow equates government with religion.  I'm just saying he approaches both topics with very similar mindsets.  He probably doesn't even realize it.
Well, Evans just released the new pages of Simonlas death. Her toilet explodes. Its the most hilarious thing I have EVER seen in my life. Now just think how hilarious the nuking of CWCVille could be? Eh? Anyway, hes already killed Simonla, meaning he'll get that whole guilt thing from Wild. Now we can force him into nuking CWCVille at a later date. This way he experiences both pains; The trauma of dealing with an emotionally broken Wild who blames him for Simonla's death and shortly after Wild finally moves on, he'll have to nuke the whole town. Now won't that make Chris feel bad? --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 04:22, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
MARKETING
 
*Chris uses American symbolism much like an advertiser would.
* Wild is going to run off and murder Simonchu or Evan or Liquid or Jason.  After that, Chris will feel better.  Hopefully Evan heads him off before he does the predictable.  It'll hurt him because we're saying "No Chris, YOU CANNOT DO THAT", the words he hates the most.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 04:33, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
:*Clarksville address.  No connection to America at all.  Just stars and stripes for no reason.
* I wouldn't call his mental fortress impregnable. Plus, if he tries to create a character that is exactly like Simonla in any way Evan will be pissed again.  Also, Chris is attempting to vent his rage at Evan via the comic. Ban him from doing so and he'll have to vent at the PSEye.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 07:24, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
::*Marketers in America (And presumably in other countries as well) will often use national symbolism in order to create feelings of comfort and familiarity in their audience.  This is a proven marketing tactic that can often be seen in car dearlship ads (of all things). The idea is "This product is good, because it, like you, is American!"
**You gotta remember, we're talking about the inside of Chris's head here.  It's a pretty fucked up place, but it's still one he's in control of.  I doubt there's anything we can do on the internet that will make CWCville an uncomfortable place for him to be.  He'll either toss up the mental block or jump through whatever hoops he needs to to make sure it's still his happy place.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 07:30, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
::*Chris's use of needless American imagery is just another way of him casting himself in a positive light. He is aware that it is good to be patriotic, and Sonichu is the good guy, so patriotism.
***This is the part of the head that's easiest to understand--the comic has always been his way of coping with people who piss him off. Everyone from Wes to Alec gets beaten up or vilified and Chris probably copy/pastes this onto his actual memories.  When he can't do that or doesn't feel like drawing, he rages at the internet.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 07:44, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
HE DOESN'T KNOW THE NATIONAL ANTHEM
***I think its genius. Remember, he literally thinks that his comic and CWCVille are entirely real. He relieves his stress by venting in the comic, because he knows that in real life he has no such power over people. Wes, Mary, Bagget, Alec, Jason, ect. He does these things to them in CWCVille because he can't do that in real life, and lets face it, if he did do that kind of shit in real life (such as destroying a building with people still inside it) then he would be executed as a terrorist. Now what if we anchored him to the real world? If Evan's influence in the real world managed to stop Chris from doing his will in CWCVille, it would destroy him. Then we should go with my idea afterwards and nuke CWCVille. I'm determined to see that hellhole become a smoking crater! --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 15:44, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
*How the hell does anybody forget their national anthem. That's something I heard every single day from Kindergarten to the end of high school, and today before every sports event I go to.  To me, and other normal people, it's pretty much inescapable.
***I'm not sure if nukes are the effect we're going for--he'll just claim another CWCville was blown up or something.  I know Chris hates impotence--he hates losing contests because he uses them to validate his self-worth.  Right now, he's probably thinking "Heh heh, DIE YOU EVAN, DIEEEEEEEE!  YOU SHOULD LEARN NOT TO DEFY A GOD!" as he draws Wild murdering him.  If Evan came up and said "Chris, by the way, you lose your website again if you attempt to include me or any of my characters in your comic", he'll be forced to scream on Youtube.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 18:42, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
*He doesn't know God bless America either.
****We will remedy this situation then, by making sure that Chris dedicates multiple pages to proving that its the real CWCVille. And as far as Wild and Evan go, he probably is. Wild is hardly going to go and kill Mary Lee Walsh for Simonlas death, is he? Chris has gotten rid of his villians now. If his mailbag ansew is to be accepted, and people like Wes Iseli and the Manajerks were also 'cured' by Chris, then he now has only three villians; Silvana, who we already know will later join Chirs, Clawdorf and Metal Sonichu/Count Graduon. So hes going to have Wild defeat either one of those three, or an Evan stand-in. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 21:17, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
HE MOCKS NATIONAL TRAGEDIES
**** Evan's trying to head him off at the pass, so we'll either get RAGE or Chris trying to cheat.  Oh, and you forgot Gio and Robotnik.  If Chris had common sense, he'd blame the bombing on Team Rocket and kill some random mook.  But he doesn't, and if we force him to kill the mook the mook will turn out to be Evan.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 21:27, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
*It's possible he saw the ED shit about 9/11 (Protip: if you think Jews did WTC, you're a fucking idiot), and figured it was okay to use 9/11 to mock trolls, because trolls mock everything.
**** Sounds like what Chris would do. And I really don't count Gio or Robotnik because i'm fairly sure that Chris has completely forgotten about their existance. Not that he hasn't forgotten about the existance of every Character who is either him or one of the main Hedgehog boys, but still...--[[User:Edward|Edward]] 22:12, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
:*That doesn't make it less fucked up.
*The samantha E-mails had him mocking earthquake victims, completely unprovoked.  Samantha was like WTF, so maybe this is just a Chris thing.
CONCLUSION
*Chris honestly does believe that he's a good Patriot, so when he says he is one, he's not intentionally lying.  That said, Chris also honestly believes that he's a good artist, writer, lover, Christian, and human being.  Chris is a dumbass.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:30, 7 May 2010 (UTC)
==OkCupid Answers==
It appears that Chris is attempting to use the patriotism card to draw in the boyfriend-free girls. In his [[List of OkCupid Answers]] he lists flag burning as a serious offense to him, more offensive than book burning. And because we all know who burned books... [[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 05:19, 21 May 2010 (UTC)
:I noticed that.  There's also some good shit on patriotisim in the regenia E-mails.  I'm gonna try and get this shit sorted out tonight, and then post it.  If it sucks, there is no doubt in my mind that Champ will delete it.  He's doing god's work.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 07:11, 21 May 2010 (UTC)
::*Oh captain my captain. If you have need of me, sir, simply ask. Yours is a noble cause. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 07:23, 21 May 2010 (UTC)
:::*Fuck it, I'm exhausted.  I have a badly mangled version of this in word right now, I'll try to unfuck it in the morning.  I'm sorry Ronichu, I've failed you once again.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 08:22, 21 May 2010 (UTC)
::::*When you post it, I'll read it afterwards and fix anything I see. 'tis the best I can offer, my liege.--[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 11:03, 21 May 2010 (UTC)

Latest revision as of 07:03, 21 May 2010

Chris and Patriotisim!

Champthom says it can't be done. He's probably right, but I'm gonna tool around with it anyway. There's not a lot that can be said about Chris's nonexistent politics, but does have a lot of very strange views on how the US operates that might make an interesting read if done properly.

Also, why is my sandbox talkpage so long?--Beat 15:55, 16 April 2010 (UTC)

I think the possible patriotism article could include a section on Thomas Jefferson, as a particularly hilarious segment of Sonichu 10 had Magi-Chan standing in front of an American flag wondering what Thomas Jefferson would think of the Asperpedia people.Ganondorfdude11 21:30, 16 April 2010 (UTC)
Another thing, Chris also has weird views on other countries as well. His war paint video, kilt video, and Christian Love Day video belie his cultural ignorance. That seems to be a theme in his "patriotism." He thinks that invoking a patriotic sentiment gives credence to his position, even when he doesn't know anything about the culture or country he is invoking. Ganondorfdude11 21:33, 16 April 2010 (UTC)

I'm trying to keep speculation to a minimum here, but the line about how Chris would have been shot or put to work in a camp gets to me a little bit. To the best of my knowledge, any stable, developed nation (The US, Canada, The vast Majority of Europe, Japan, Australia, essentially anywhere with a stable government, good infrastructure, and without massive amounts of poverty,) Chris would likely grow up to be very similar to the way he is now. Giant useless manbabys exist in pretty much every nation where daily life isn't a grave hardship.

Had he been born in a developing, war-torn, or otherwise miserable nation, I figure there's two distinct possiblities. One would be that he wouldn't have survived past Childhood, either because his autisim caused him to wander into a dangerous situation, or because the way he acted put others at risk. The second is that the constant Hardship would beat the laziness out of him, and he would become much like every other person growing up there.

That said, this is all useless speculation. I'm just typing all this as I try to find a way to say Chris is lucky he's an american without inviting a thousand edits claiming that he's as he is BECAUSE he's American. It's a factor, sure, but I don't think he'd be significantly different had he been born in Bristol England or Auckland New Zeland.--Beat 19:02, 2 May 2010 (UTC)

I think even the stars & bars flag would be inaccurate; sure he's a bigoted redneck but even they find his views extreme (CWCville would hardly be the best example of "states rights"). Would a swastika be invoking Godwin's law too much? Or maybe a Soviet or Chinese flag, I don't know, something to reflect his totalitarian views. Bill Lumburg 20:30, 2 May 2010 (UTC)

CHRIS AND AMERICA IN AMERICA FOR AMERICA FUCK YEAH

Now we can cover all of Chris's stupid-ass ideas on the nation in one place. --Beat 16:01, 3 May 2010 (UTC)

THE PRESIDENT

I think you should add how his opinion of the president usually waffles depending on who's in office. Bill Lumburg 17:38, 6 May 2010 (UTC)

Okay, so the actual patriotism part now

This article is probably the most I've ever agonized over stuff I've written for this site. I just want it to be good. Right now though Just trying to get some sort of outline down here.

How Chris Views His Country

GOD

  • Chris views the US government, law enforcement agencies with much the same attitude he views God. I am not saying that Chris thinks of the US as god, merely that he applies the same Chris-logic to them.
  • He doesn't really understand how either of them work, and he has made no effort to learn anything about them.
  • He completely ignores both of them until it is convenient for him.
  • He expects both to protect/look out for him, even though he ignores them the rest of the time.
  • He expects both to go out of their way to help him, often at the expense of everybody else.
  • He expects both to take a personal interest in the immediate destruction of his enemies.
  • He is completely ungrateful for the bounty both have provided him.
  • Again, I am not saying that Chris somehow equates government with religion. I'm just saying he approaches both topics with very similar mindsets. He probably doesn't even realize it.

MARKETING

  • Chris uses American symbolism much like an advertiser would.
  • Clarksville address. No connection to America at all. Just stars and stripes for no reason.
  • Marketers in America (And presumably in other countries as well) will often use national symbolism in order to create feelings of comfort and familiarity in their audience. This is a proven marketing tactic that can often be seen in car dearlship ads (of all things). The idea is "This product is good, because it, like you, is American!"
  • Chris's use of needless American imagery is just another way of him casting himself in a positive light. He is aware that it is good to be patriotic, and Sonichu is the good guy, so patriotism.

HE DOESN'T KNOW THE NATIONAL ANTHEM

  • How the hell does anybody forget their national anthem. That's something I heard every single day from Kindergarten to the end of high school, and today before every sports event I go to. To me, and other normal people, it's pretty much inescapable.
  • He doesn't know God bless America either.

HE MOCKS NATIONAL TRAGEDIES

  • It's possible he saw the ED shit about 9/11 (Protip: if you think Jews did WTC, you're a fucking idiot), and figured it was okay to use 9/11 to mock trolls, because trolls mock everything.
  • That doesn't make it less fucked up.
  • The samantha E-mails had him mocking earthquake victims, completely unprovoked. Samantha was like WTF, so maybe this is just a Chris thing.

CONCLUSION

  • Chris honestly does believe that he's a good Patriot, so when he says he is one, he's not intentionally lying. That said, Chris also honestly believes that he's a good artist, writer, lover, Christian, and human being. Chris is a dumbass.--Beat 03:30, 7 May 2010 (UTC)

OkCupid Answers

It appears that Chris is attempting to use the patriotism card to draw in the boyfriend-free girls. In his List of OkCupid Answers he lists flag burning as a serious offense to him, more offensive than book burning. And because we all know who burned books... Ganondorfdude11 05:19, 21 May 2010 (UTC)

I noticed that. There's also some good shit on patriotisim in the regenia E-mails. I'm gonna try and get this shit sorted out tonight, and then post it. If it sucks, there is no doubt in my mind that Champ will delete it. He's doing god's work.--Beat 07:11, 21 May 2010 (UTC)
  • Oh captain my captain. If you have need of me, sir, simply ask. Yours is a noble cause. --Ronichu 07:23, 21 May 2010 (UTC)
  • Fuck it, I'm exhausted. I have a badly mangled version of this in word right now, I'll try to unfuck it in the morning. I'm sorry Ronichu, I've failed you once again.--Beat 08:22, 21 May 2010 (UTC)
  • When you post it, I'll read it afterwards and fix anything I see. 'tis the best I can offer, my liege.--Ronichu 11:03, 21 May 2010 (UTC)
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