Difference between revisions of "SpaghettiRoutine"

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(Added transcription of this video.)
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===Transcript===
===Transcript===


For this presentation I was going to make some spaghetti, live in the kitchen! ...but unfortunately I don't have access cause Mom (garbled) put a whole bunch of crap in the way. So I am going to mime it.
For this presentation, I was going to make some spaghetti, live in the kitchen. But unfortunately, I don't have access to stove 'cause mom put a whole bunch of crap in the way. So, I am going to mime it. [''Mimes picking up a pot.']' Here's the pot. [''Wipes down the imaginary stove and mimes putting the pot on the burner.''] Put it on the stove. [''Mimes turning on the stove.']' Set it to the boiling temperature. ''Gestures upwards, making a sound that imitates steam rushing up, before tapping imaginary keys/buttons to his right.'' Boop-boop-boop-boop! Ah, in time the water's boiling. So we take the pot of spaghetti noodles...[''Mimics something unidentifiable.''] And...[''Hissing noises, wild gestures.''] Click click click! [''Stirring motions. Adopts a baby voice.''] Noodles, smell so good! [''Lifts pretend noodles as if on a spoon.''] Mm, hey look at that. Drippy, no sniffy! [?] [''Holds them close to the camera.''] I offer you some don—some non drippy! [?] But it's hot right now, so you might wanna wait a while. [''More hissing, more stirring.''] Yeah, I say our noodles are done. [''More imaginary knob turning. Chris motions as if holding a fishing rod.''] Hey, we pour—we drain the water out. [''Does so, and sets “pot” down.''] Get some plates. [''Mimes getting plates down.''] Oh wait...we're serving two! [''In light of this epiphany, Chris tosses the excess plates away and makes shattering sounds.''] Haha! I'm just kiddin'. [''More gesturing, seems to be serving spaghetti.''] Fork. [''Mimes scraping pot.''] We don't want any noodles left behind! Boob [?] ran set out later!  
(Chris reaches over and grabs an imaginary pot.)
Here's the pot.
(Chris waves his hands over the imaginary stove, apparently cleaning it.)
Put it on the stove.
(He tweaks the air in front of him, turning the "stove" on.)
Set it to the boiling temperature...
(He waves his hands in front of him.)
Boop-boop-boop! In time, the water's boiling, so we take a box of spaghetti noodles (he opens the "box" and dumps it in the "pot", then stirs it.)
Tweet-tweet-tweet-tweet!
(He continues stirring, making a hissing noise as he does so.)
(Baby voice) Noodle is so-so good!
(He "lifts" some of the "noodles" out of the "pot.")
Hey look at that, trippy, no sticky, I often use them don-- to non-stick drippy! But it's hot right now, so you might want to wait a while!
(He hisses again and resumes stirring.)
Well, I say our noodles are done.
(Chris turns the "stove" off.)
Then we pour it-- we drain the water out!
(He makes a draining noise and a kissy face.)
We get some pla--we get some plates...
(He grabs the "plates" and mimes distributing them.)
Oh wait a minute, we're serving doo (?)
(He throws a "plate" and makes a smashing noise.)
I'm just kiddin'.
(He grabs some "noodles" from the "pot" and puts them on the "plate," then grabs "silverware.")
Fork!
(He uses the "fork" to scrape the "noodles" onto the "plate.")
Don't want any noodles to be left behind! And in the meantime, here's a good jar of marinara sauce!
(He takes the "jar", opens it with some difficulty...)
Here we go, I popped the seal!
(...and pours it onto the "noodles.")
Glug-glug-glug. And now, some grated mozzerella!
(He "grinds" some "cheese" onto the "pasta" while making shaking noises.)
And we'll add some other spices from my father's collection, which includes rosemary, garlic, parsley, whatever!
(He mimics doing so.)
And you can make your own meatballs with processed meat and putting it on a tray or something, letting it (?) and then rolling it all in a ball. But then they're not so good-- not as good, are they? So why not buy your own meatballs? We had this package of Swedish meatballs and we put it in the microwave-- warm it up already!
(He mimics adding the meatballs to the pasta.)
And in the end, on what-- at least-- on one of the two plates you get something like THIS!
(He turns the camera toward a finished paper plate of pasta.)
Yummy-yummy delicious!
(He turns the camera back toward himself.)
Now we can sit down and eat our spagheddy...it is so delicious! It smells so good! You want a bite?
(He holds a forkfull of spaghetti up to the camera.)
Look at this, you want a bite? You better take a bite, cause you know what? Watch this! You watchin'?
(He abruptly slams his face into the plate of pasta, getting sauce everywhere and laughs.)
I'm just kiddin'! (He wipes his face off.) I wouldn't do that to ya in real life, it's funny.
Hey, at least my head's not fuckin' orange like a certain...Cashy-type person I know!


In the meantime, here's a good jar of marinara sauce. [''Produces imaginary sauce. Unscrews it with unnecessary groaning noises, then a pop sound to indicate the jar coming off.''] There we go, I popped the seal! [''Pours it.''] Bloop-bloop-bloop-bloop...and now some grated mozzarella! [''Sings while caressing the mozzarella.''] I gotta pop this seal. Bloop-bloop...[''Shakes it over the food.''] And we'll add other spices...from my father's collection, which includes rosemary, garlic, parsley, whatever. [''More “unsealing”, more “shaking.”'']
And you can make your own meatballs with processed meat and put it all on a tray or something, letting it grow [?!], and then rolling it all into balls. But they isn't not so good, not as good, are they? So, one way around that [?], you can buy your own meatballs. We had this pa-had this package of swedish meatballs, cook it in the microwave so they're warming up already. [''Opens a package of imaginary meatballs, does something unidentifiable to them, and appears to dump them all over the “table.”''] And in the end, I'll wa-I'll at least...we'll have a few plates, you get summat...like this! [''Turns the camera to focus on a plate of real spaghetti and meatballs on a paper plate. Zooms in an out on it.''] Yummy, yummy, delicious!
[''Focuses back on himself. Goes back to the baby voice.''] So now we can sit down and eat our spaghetti. It is so delicious. [''Stirs the plate of real spaghetti with a plastic fork.''] It smells so good![''Holds a forkful up to the camera.''] You want a bite? Look at this you want a bite? Mm, that good, myum. You better take a bite, because you know what? Watch this. [''Chris mashes his face into the spaghetti like a child and takes several disgusting bites, then emerges with sauce on his nose and chin. Holds out his arms and smiles like he did something worth praising.''] Ta-da! [''Laughs. Wipes his face with a paper towel.''] I'm just kiddin'. I wouldn't do that to you in real life. It's fun. Hey, at least my head's not fuckin' orange. Like a certain...[''Wipes nose some more'']...Cashey type person I know. [''Turns camera off.'']
 
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ShowerClean2]]|nextlink=[[WelcometoBollywood]]}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ShowerClean2]]|nextlink=[[WelcometoBollywood]]}}



Revision as of 13:34, 30 October 2010

SpaghettiRoutine is a video Chris uploaded on 30 October 2010. In this video, Chris mimes the preparation of spaghetti. He had planned to actually cook some spaghetti in his kitchen, but his mother had cluttered up the stove. Chris then presents the finished dish served on a paper plate (due to lack of clean ones?) and rubs his face in it. As he wipes the sauce from his face, he makes a reference to an orange-faced Cashy type person he knows.

Video

SpaghettiRoutine
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Stardate 30 October 2010
Subject Matter OtherUnknownIcon.png Home Cooking, TrollsTrolls Trolls
Performance Style CrazyCrazy Crazy, ComedyComedy Comedy
Shirt Vert RedVert Red Vertical Red
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Transcript

For this presentation, I was going to make some spaghetti, live in the kitchen. But unfortunately, I don't have access to stove 'cause mom put a whole bunch of crap in the way. So, I am going to mime it. [Mimes picking up a pot.']' Here's the pot. [Wipes down the imaginary stove and mimes putting the pot on the burner.] Put it on the stove. [Mimes turning on the stove.']' Set it to the boiling temperature. Gestures upwards, making a sound that imitates steam rushing up, before tapping imaginary keys/buttons to his right. Boop-boop-boop-boop! Ah, in time the water's boiling. So we take the pot of spaghetti noodles...[Mimics something unidentifiable.] And...[Hissing noises, wild gestures.] Click click click! [Stirring motions. Adopts a baby voice.] Noodles, smell so good! [Lifts pretend noodles as if on a spoon.] Mm, hey look at that. Drippy, no sniffy! [?] [Holds them close to the camera.] I offer you some don—some non drippy! [?] But it's hot right now, so you might wanna wait a while. [More hissing, more stirring.] Yeah, I say our noodles are done. [More imaginary knob turning. Chris motions as if holding a fishing rod.] Hey, we pour—we drain the water out. [Does so, and sets “pot” down.] Get some plates. [Mimes getting plates down.] Oh wait...we're serving two! [In light of this epiphany, Chris tosses the excess plates away and makes shattering sounds.] Haha! I'm just kiddin'. [More gesturing, seems to be serving spaghetti.] Fork. [Mimes scraping pot.] We don't want any noodles left behind! Boob [?] ran set out later!

In the meantime, here's a good jar of marinara sauce. [Produces imaginary sauce. Unscrews it with unnecessary groaning noises, then a pop sound to indicate the jar coming off.] There we go, I popped the seal! [Pours it.] Bloop-bloop-bloop-bloop...and now some grated mozzarella! [Sings while caressing the mozzarella.] I gotta pop this seal. Bloop-bloop...[Shakes it over the food.] And we'll add other spices...from my father's collection, which includes rosemary, garlic, parsley, whatever. [More “unsealing”, more “shaking.”]

And you can make your own meatballs with processed meat and put it all on a tray or something, letting it grow [?!], and then rolling it all into balls. But they isn't not so good, not as good, are they? So, one way around that [?], you can buy your own meatballs. We had this pa-had this package of swedish meatballs, cook it in the microwave so they're warming up already. [Opens a package of imaginary meatballs, does something unidentifiable to them, and appears to dump them all over the “table.”] And in the end, I'll wa-I'll at least...we'll have a few plates, you get summat...like this! [Turns the camera to focus on a plate of real spaghetti and meatballs on a paper plate. Zooms in an out on it.] Yummy, yummy, delicious!

[Focuses back on himself. Goes back to the baby voice.] So now we can sit down and eat our spaghetti. It is so delicious. [Stirs the plate of real spaghetti with a plastic fork.] It smells so good![Holds a forkful up to the camera.] You want a bite? Look at this you want a bite? Mm, that good, myum. You better take a bite, because you know what? Watch this. [Chris mashes his face into the spaghetti like a child and takes several disgusting bites, then emerges with sauce on his nose and chin. Holds out his arms and smiles like he did something worth praising.] Ta-da! [Laughs. Wipes his face with a paper towel.] I'm just kiddin'. I wouldn't do that to you in real life. It's fun. Hey, at least my head's not fuckin' orange. Like a certain...[Wipes nose some more]...Cashey type person I know. [Turns camera off.]

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