User:Old meme/Sandbox

According to CWCipedia, the Samurai Pizza Bots are a cadre of Transformers who protect the city of CWCville from enemy attack. Since they didn't appear until issue nine, one wonders why the hell these giant combat robots haven't been helping Christian and Sonichu not get their heads kicked in by a variety of implausible super-villains.

The who, now?

Apparently, the streets of CWCville are patrolled by a handful of Autobots whose cover job is that of pizza delivery. One of their number turns into a samurai robot. This seems justification enough to call them the Samurai Pizza Bots, which in no way resembles an obscure anime from the early 90s.

There are five members of the Samurai Pizza Bots:

Son-Chu

Chris's own Transformer. Why a powerful, intergalactic, shape changing robot is in his service is beyond us. Like most things in his comic, it's there because Chris thinks it's awesome. Yeah, we have some different standards of awesome here.

Armoraxe

The armored, axe-wielding vehicle named for his charming wit and propensity for wisecracks.

From the CWCipedia:

Rockin' And Stompin hard while Partying with the 52 Pies from the shop, Armoraxe is a real Guitar Hero. Having the strong armor from his Heavy-Beat Van Mode makes him TOUGH. He attacks the Bad Bots with his Sharp Axe, that can also transform into a Plasma Rifle; when he Plays That Beat, HE WAILS!!!

Armoraxe is one of Chris's ripped off Transformers, designed after Soundwave of Transformers Animated.

His vehicle form is that of a minivan, perhaps more specifically a Scion xB. In its robot form, it carries a boombox on its shoulders and wields a guitar. Due to Chris's lack of talent, it is difficult to discern if his face is on the boombox itself or where he has a separate head that is in front of it. Chris describes him as being a "real Guitar Hero". He apparently attacks by playing his guitar, which can transform into a plasma rifle. According to Chris, "when he Plays That Beat, HE WAILS!!!", whatever the hell that means.

In yet another example out of thousands that show how shitty Chris's comic is, when Chris took down the 4-cent_garbage.com building in Sonichu #10 through the power of Rock, Chris showed up in Son-Chu instead of Armoraxe, and Son-Chu turned into a mobile rock stage. He didn't bring along Armoraxe at all. Armoraxe's entire raison d'être is that he's a walking talking robotic sound system with a guitar, and the one fucking time he could have been at all useful, Chris chose to Mary Sue his shitwagon.

Excelina

Excelina shows off her PRIMUS-GIVEN ROBOT VAGINA. Son-Chu stands by her side.

A motorcycle with a blatantly obvious hologram "rider". Men are courteously informed that she is just a hologram. Just in case you thought Chris's art had gotten even worse. Based on Chris's naming conventions, the name itself is probably ripped off from Excelina of Steel Angel Kurumi, or possibly Excel Saga, which Chris has parodied before. In Episode 20, Excelina exposes her robot vagina for reasons that remain unclear.

However, it is possible that Excelina is a rip-off of Archerina, a minor villain from the end of Power Rangers Zeo/Choriki Sentai Ohranger.

From the CWCipedia:

Slick, cool, and full of style in her attacks. Our other Cycle-Bot, Excelina knows all the shortcuts throughout Cwcville. When a Bad Bot is afoot, she can get there faster than a 10-Second or FREE Deal in her Hot Pink Cycle Mode. She is Strong-Fisted Up-Close, but her main weapon is Sniper-Style. When she needs a good shot, she needs space.

Bumble-Lumba

The most assuredly retarded Bumblebee ripoff.

From the CWCipedia:

A Yellow/Green Bug-Car, Bumble-Lumba not only delivers pizzas quick and slick, but when a Decepti-Clone attacks a nearby Couple or two, he does not hesitate to paralyze the bot with his stingers and kick its ass back to PVCCitizens.

Prower

Punchy taking his bitch for a stroll

The samurai motorcycle thingy owned by Punchy Sonichu and ridden brazenly like a man-pony at an S'n'M club, and in absolutely no way ripping off of Miles Prower aka Tails.

From the CWCipedia:

Punchy's Motorbike is also an Autobot. Sidecar to make strong armor for the quick, slick and stealthy Prower. He relies on his Ninjitsu, Razor-Sharp Choppin' Hands, Shuriken Stars and holographic images make him a Sharp close-bot-attacker.

“	Punchy's Motorbike is also an Autobot. Sidecar to make strong armor for the quick, slick and stealthy Prower. He relies on his Ninjitsu, Razor-Sharp Choppin' Hands, Shuriken Stars and holographic images make him a Sharp close-bot-attacker.	”
CWCipedia

Prower (sometimes spelled Prowler) is Punchy Sonichu's Autobot motorcycle.

Prower shares many similarities with the Autobot cyber-ninja Prowl from the Transformers animated series, such as their samurai armor (which is a sidecar in vehicle-mode), their name, their vehicle-mode, and the fact that both are ninjas, relying on stealth, holographic images and shurikens to fight. Chris once again proves to be a creative genius who never ripped anything off ever in any way.

In the CWCipedia article for Punchy Sonichu, Chris elaborates on the circumstances under which Punchy and Prower met. It basically amounts to Punchy noticing a motorcycle, talking to it, and it talking back (of note: in the exchange, Prower seems to be far more well-versed in random-access humor than Punchy, despite Chris frequently expounding on the latter's prowess in that area.) The two then nonsensically agree to be partners. Chris also cutely dubs them "Friends of the Fist".

It is also worth noting that Prower is extremely close to how a stereotypical Asian would pronounce "Prowler," perhaps a reference to Punchy's perceived ethnicity. Another coincidence is that our autistic hero has, amongst the ocean of useless junk that lies in his bedroom, a Prowl model, which is briefly shown in Chris' video CWCFlyingElephants.

In a last display of intellectual theft, "Prower" is also the last name of the character Tails in Sonic the Hedgehog.

Totally original and not at all stolen

Once again, these vehicles—a Ford Escort, two motorcycles of unknown make (because Chris knows dick about motorcycles, let alone cars, and draws what's supposed to be a Beetle), a Scion xB, and an '09 Camaro (totally not ripping off Bumblebee in the Transformers movie)—are used to deliver for a local pizzeria, adorned with a logo that integrates the Autobot symbol, and are seen in association with the local team of superpowered whackjobs. Given that the whole idea behind Transformer altmodes is to be discreet, it might be safe to assume that the Autobots use CWCville as a dumping ground for Autobots too stupid to live. Given that retarded robot dinosaurs and blatantly offensive racist caricatures are active members, that's saying something.

So where the fuck did they come from?

Let me guess, at this point you're wondering where the hell they've been since the beginning of the comic. That's a damn good question, and given that Chris seems to imply the SPB have been around for some time, it's one that really should be answered. Were the Autobots new in town, perhaps to help hold the line while Mayor Mary Sue was buggering off in the Time Void, that might be reasonable (as reasonable as yet another intellectual property coming to town would be). As-is, it seems that the Samurai Pizza Bots have been too busy doing their cover jobs correctly to indulge the petty desires of an autistic man-child, waiting until the enemies they're supposed to be fighting show up.

...Hmmm, maybe they're not that bad after all.

Gallery of plagiarism

• 

  Excelina = Arcee (movie version). Sadly, this can't even be considered a recolor because he didn't change the colors. The name probably makes reference to Excel Saga.

• 

  Bumble-Lumba = Animated Bumblebee

• 

  Prower = Animated Prowl. Punchy was probably trying to name him "Prowl" but couldn't pronounce the "l" sound because he's Asian.

• 

  Armoraxe = Animated Soundwave. Not only did he become stupid looking, but now he's an Autobot! This is an insult!

See also

• Transformers