Difference between revisions of "That Goatee WILL Grow Back"

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[[File:Asperchutthegoateewillgrowback.png|center|900px]]
'''That Goatee WILL Grow Back''' (officially '''Christian Weston Chandler - It Took Me Weeks to Perfect that Goatee, but it WILL Grow Back''') is a [[video]] uploaded to [[YouTube]] on 31 [[July 2009]]. In it, [[Chris]] goes back to his old self after concerns regarding him being a [[Clown shirt|stripe]]less, [[medallion]]less, goatee-sporting [[Ian Brandon Anderson|impostor]] by violently failing at shaving while Christian pop-rock blares in the background for emotional effect.
'''That Goatee WILL Grow Back''' (officially '''Christian Weston Chandler - It Took Me Weeks to Perfect that Goatee, but it WILL Grow Back''') is a [[video]] uploaded to [[YouTube]] on 31 [[July 2009]]. In it, [[Chris]] goes back to his old self after concerns regarding him being a [[Clown shirt|stripe]]less, [[medallion]]less, goatee-sporting [[Ian Brandon Anderson|impostor]] by violently failing at shaving while Christian pop-rock blares in the background for emotional effect.


If Chris were smart and knew how to shave properly, he would have used shaving cream (or at least some olive oil), soap, a mirror, and water, but because he's Chris this video had to have give him 2 weeks of razor burn.
If Chris were smart and knew how to shave properly, he would have used shaving cream (or at least some olive oil), soap, a mirror, and water, or at least buy an electric razor - but because he's Chris, he instead chose a method that probably gave him at least two weeks' worth of razor burn. That he isn't at all bleeding from the aggressive dry-shaving he does probably attests to [[Chris and health|how greasy his skin is]].


As of {{CURRENTYEAR}}, the goatee did not grow back.
Chris did regrow the goatee for a time later in the year, but not for long, and it wasn't styled quite the same way. As of {{CURRENTYEAR}}, the goatee hasn't grown back, and following Chris's [[transgender]] lifestyle change, it probably never will.


==Video==
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
{{Infobox/video
| name          = Christian Weston Chandler - It Took Me Weeks to Perfect that Goatee, but it WILL Grow Back
| name          = Christian Weston Chandler - It Took Me Weeks to Perfect that Goatee, but it WILL Grow Back
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|fZ4A_Wr90L4}}
| ytid          = fZ4A_Wr90L4
| stardate      = 31 [[July 2009]]
| stardate      = 31 [[July 2009]]
| style          = {{Crazy|text}}
| style          = {{Crazy|text}}
Line 18: Line 20:


=== Transcript ===
=== Transcript ===
[''Chris removes his glasses and speaks inaudibly to the camera as "Lift Up Your Eyes" by [[wikipedia:Planetshakers|Planetshakers]] plays over him. He puts his glasses down, removes his waistcoat and takes off a medallion inscribed with the phrase "THE TIME OF MY LIFE", which he shows to the camera and then discards. Using a razor but no cream, he begins taking vertical and horizontal swipes across his chin with alarming force. The head bounces off from the handle, and he picks it back up, reattaches it and resumes. After a few more strokes, the head pops out again. After further scraping, he seems to put this razor down and pick up a new one. We jump cut to Chris with the new razor, and the head pops out before just barely touching his face. He reattaches it and continues. After more shaving, he stops to check for unshaven areas; he then resumes, checks, resumes, checks, finds it to his satisfaction and the video ends''.]
[''Chris removes his glasses and speaks inaudibly to the camera as "Lift Up Your Eyes" by {{w|Planetshakers}} plays over him. He puts his glasses down, removes his waistcoat and takes off a medallion inscribed with the phrase "THE TIME OF MY LIFE", which he shows to the camera and then discards. He begins taking vertical and horizontal swipes across his chin with a razor with alarming force and without any cream, soap, or water. The head launches off from the handle, and he picks it back up, reattaches it, and resumes. After a few more strokes, the head pops out again. After further scraping, he seems to put this razor down and pick up a new one. We jump cut to Chris with the new razor, and the head pops out before just barely touching his face. He reattaches it and continues. After more shaving, he stops to check for unshaven areas; he then resumes, checks, resumes, checks, finds it to his satisfaction and the video ends''.]


{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]|nextlink=[[SingStar Challenge|SingStar Challenge Announcement]]|}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]|nextlink=[[SingStar Challenge|SingStar Challenge Announcement]]|}}

Latest revision as of 09:46, 9 January 2023

Asperchutthegoateewillgrowback.png

That Goatee WILL Grow Back (officially Christian Weston Chandler - It Took Me Weeks to Perfect that Goatee, but it WILL Grow Back) is a video uploaded to YouTube on 31 July 2009. In it, Chris goes back to his old self after concerns regarding him being a stripeless, medallionless, goatee-sporting impostor by violently failing at shaving while Christian pop-rock blares in the background for emotional effect.

If Chris were smart and knew how to shave properly, he would have used shaving cream (or at least some olive oil), soap, a mirror, and water, or at least buy an electric razor - but because he's Chris, he instead chose a method that probably gave him at least two weeks' worth of razor burn. That he isn't at all bleeding from the aggressive dry-shaving he does probably attests to how greasy his skin is.

Chris did regrow the goatee for a time later in the year, but not for long, and it wasn't styled quite the same way. As of 2024, the goatee hasn't grown back, and following Chris's transgender lifestyle change, it probably never will.

Video

Christian Weston Chandler - It Took Me Weeks to Perfect that Goatee, but it WILL Grow Back
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Direct link Youtube, archive
Stardate 31 July 2009
Performance Style CrazyCrazy Crazy
Saga LiquidLiquid Liquid Chris
Shirt Classic ShirtClassic Shirt The Classic
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
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CWC Update 29 July 2009 		next
SingStar Challenge Announcement


Transcript

[Chris removes his glasses and speaks inaudibly to the camera as "Lift Up Your Eyes" by Planetshakers plays over him. He puts his glasses down, removes his waistcoat and takes off a medallion inscribed with the phrase "THE TIME OF MY LIFE", which he shows to the camera and then discards. He begins taking vertical and horizontal swipes across his chin with a razor with alarming force and without any cream, soap, or water. The head launches off from the handle, and he picks it back up, reattaches it, and resumes. After a few more strokes, the head pops out again. After further scraping, he seems to put this razor down and pick up a new one. We jump cut to Chris with the new razor, and the head pops out before just barely touching his face. He reattaches it and continues. After more shaving, he stops to check for unshaven areas; he then resumes, checks, resumes, checks, finds it to his satisfaction and the video ends.]

⇐ CWC Update 29 July 2009 Chris's videos SingStar Challenge Announcement ⇒

v • d • e  
The CWCivil War of 2009
IBAChandler • CChanSonichuCWC
Videos by IBAChandler
SingStar Challenge
Announcement and Rules • Rounds: 1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 5
Other people
Contact
SHOWDOWN • Kacey calls (1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 5 • 6 • 7 • 8 • 9 • 10 • 11 • 12 • 13 • 14 • 15 • 16 • 17 • 18 • 19 • 20 • 21 • 22 • 23 • 24) • Father Call • Kacey and Liquid Call • The End For Real
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