View source for Pedo-Glasses

{{Quote|My frames are good; [[Chris and fashion|they look good to me]], and they are the best fit for my lenses anyway.|Chris, [[Mailbag 14#The pedoglasses stay|on his choice of eyewear]].}}

[[Image:069-SchuGlasses.jpg|thumb|Right|Sonichu on his pedo-glasses - "I think I've picked the wrong frames." Yes, yes you have.]]

The '''Pedo-Glasses''' is the colloquial name for Chris's classic aviator spectacles, the appearance of which has been described as recalling some form of [[Chris and sex|sexual deviant]], such as a [[pedofork]]. 

==Glasses== 
Chris claims in his [[CWC's Diary|diary]] that he began wearing glasses on 2 February [[1998]] because of nearsightedness.<ref>[[CWC's Diary]]</ref> He was diagnosed by his ophthalmologist half-brother [[David Chandler|David Alan Chandler]].<ref>[[Other documents#About his family]]</ref> Not long after, he had an altercation with a [[niggos|black]] kid on the school bus and his glasses were knocked off his face and possibly broken, depending on the version of the story.<ref>[[Jackie Chat 9]] and [[Kacey Call 9]]</ref> Confusingly, Chris has stated that the bus incident occurred during his freshman year of [[high school]] (1996-97); if true, this suggests that the date in his diary is probably wrong and that he really began wearing glasses in February [[1997]].

The classic frames which Chris was wearing at the time of his discovery were double-bridged (to reduce damage induced by fits of [[Chris and anger|tard rage]]) and somewhat oversized, their roundness emphasizing Chris's pudgy face and [[Obesity|generally rotund form]]. He got them at [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]].<ref name=mb20>[[Mailbag 20#Chris defends the pedo-glasses]]</ref> The earpieces were connected by a string attachment that nobody else under the age of sixty would use.

Often these types of frames and lenses are among the few cheap pairs available by default to patients if they want to utilize their [[monthly tugboat|Social Security Disability Insurance]] on vision benefits. Of course, many tend to spend some extra cash on a much less hideous pair of frames, but Chris has [[sex toys|better]] [[Lego|things]] [[Toys|to]] [[video games|buy]].

Chris thought the glasses looked good on him, calling them "Respectable Frames."<ref name=mb20/> He also justified them with the argument that "they are the best fit for my lenses anyway."<ref>[[Mailbag 14#The pedoglasses stay]]</ref> Though some stronger prescriptions do require bigger frames to accommodate thicker lenses, standard prescription spectacles could be ground down to fit any glasses Chris desires.

Nevertheless, Chris has always been somewhat self-conscious about his glasses. He worried that his "needed-to-see-a-far-distance glasses" made it difficult for women to notice his "handsome face."<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 3#Chris complains about his shitty social life]]</ref> He does not wear them for [[Dating profiles|dating profile]] photos. 

While Chris's [[LittleBigPlanet]] avatar wears glasses, [[Comic Chris]] almost never does, though no one knows why. It could be that he finds drawing the glasses to be [[Chris and stress|stress]]ful, or that his self-image is stuck in early 1998. Perhaps Chris's idealized self has 20-20 vision? [[Sammy]], a more accurate representation of the real Chris than Comic Chris, does wear glasses. They aren't pedo-glasses, though, more closely resembling the ones worn by [[Family Guy|Peter Griffin]]. 

In a [[Madman Rising|video diatribe]] against the trolls he defensively stammered: 

{{quote|I'm only nearsighted; I do wear glasses. Take it or leave it, losers! It m--it helps me see better...see more detail...and more clear vision than any of you knuckleheads can put together...out of your own ego that you so richly...consume of.|You tell 'em, Chris.}} 

In a [[WeighIn|couple of]] [[FullHouse|videos]] posted in [[October 2010]], it appeared that Chris had wrapped tape over the bridge of his glasses. The tape was later replaced by a more permanent solution in the form of a nose-piece crafted with [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|CRAYOLA FUCKIN' MODEL MAGIC]].<ref>[[Don'tPintheOop]]</ref> How exactly his frames broke in the first place is unknown. [[The_MovingForward_videos|The MovingForward Videos]] show that Chris sometimes stores his glasses in his back pocket, though, so it's not entirely unlikely that he simply forgot they were there and [[Obesity|sat on them]].

The [[Tomgirl Pictures]] indicated that by [[April 2011]] he had gotten a new pair just as cheap as the first. Alas, these glasses, which Chris describes as "$324 Rx lens glasses," were broken by the [[jerkops]] while Chris was resisting arrest on [[28 October 2011]]. 

Amazingly, in [[You're Always Pretty]], leaked in [[February 2012]], Barb is seen wearing Chris's old Pedo-Glasses, clearly identifiable by the blue Crayola Model Magic bridge. Hoarders gotta hoard.

In [[May 2012]], a [[Facebook]] profile pic showed that Chris had replaced the Pedo-Glasses with a relatively normal pair; unfortunately, this improvement was offset by his being a creepy [[Tomgirl]] with awful [[hair]]. He seems to have managed to hold onto this pair into [[2015]]. On special occasions, though, like [[Cville Pride|gay pride festivals]] and [[26 December 2014|assaults]], he sports a pair of plastic [[My Little Pony]] goggles.
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==Dramatic glasses removal==
Chris has been known to emphatically remove his glasses from his face for dramatic effect in his videos, often putting them on just so he can tear them off again, like the manchild version of David Caruso. In a video from [[100 2188|27 May 2010]], he removes his glasses, puts them back on, and removes them again within the space of less than thirty seconds.

In various videos Chris also appears to take his glasses off and throw them to the floor. This was particularly common during his feud with [[Liquid Chris]], when the dispute over his identity had him especially wound up — see [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC|here]] and [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|here]] for examples. Obviously, this is an excellent way to damage them.
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==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
File:043-CWCsFavHitsIn.jpg|Early appearance.
File:485-CWCsF.JPG|The Pedo-Glasses in oil pastels.
File:Cwcregularglasses.JPG|Classic appearance of the glasses.
File:Cwctapedglasses.JPG|Taped glasses after suffering some [[Chris and anger|abuse]].
File:Cwcmagicglasses.JPG|Chris fashioned a new bridge from [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|Crayola fuckin' Model Magic.]]
File:133696094632.jpg|Another photo of the Crayola fuckin' Model Magic bridge.
File:TG15.jpg|In the [[Tomgirl Pictures]] Chris is seen with a new pair.
File:Barb-pedo-glasses.jpg|Barb, in [[You're Always Pretty]], appears to be wearing the Pedo-Glasses (note the Crayola bridge).
File:Chris FB Profile PIc (May 8th,2012).png|Now 1% normal!
File:Pride 3.jpeg|The tomgirl transgender male lesbian female soul variant.
File:Madman.jpg|Chris's plastic goggles, seen as part of the outfit he wore during the events of [[26 December 2014]].
June1YoungChrisPhoto.jpg|A 2021 photo with Chris' glasses visible at right.
File:CWC closeup - Jul 2023 photo.png|The [[Post-jail sightings (2023)|Post-Jail]] variant.
</gallery></center>

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name           = DRAMATIC GLASSES REMOVAL
| ytid           = p9nkN1AHKD0
| stardate       = 13 November 2009
| subject        = {{Tragedy|[[Stress|Chris's Sadness]]}}
| maker          = IBAClydeCash
}}

== Sources ==
<references/>
{{Mannerisms}}
{{Health}}
{{Relics of Fail}}

[[Category:Pages with fan videos]]
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]