Difference between revisions of "Molvanîa"

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[[Image:Molvania_svg.png|thumb|National flag of Molvanîa]]
Long live ThePCAssassins!
[[Image:Molvania Map.png|thumb|Our country, our home - Molvanîa]]
 
The '''Republic of Molvanîa''' (aka "''The Land Untouched by Modern Dentistry''") is an East European nation where [[Julie]] hails from, as well as where [[Arjen Van Dierten]]'s uncle Edward and cousins Cameron and Rebecca (RIP) used to work as [[America]]n diplomats before the country imploded in January of [[2009]]. A real tragedy, for it was the land all [[trolls]] could call home.
 
Showing his geography prowess, [[Chris]] believes it is somewhere near North [[Virginia]] and Germany. Despite reading the [[wikipedia:Molvanîa|Wikipedia article]]{{cite}}, which clearly states it's a fictional country, and not being able to find it on a globe, Chris still thinks that Molvanîa is a [[TRUE and HONEST]] country. This is largely due to the fact that a troll sent a letter to Chris claiming that Molvanîa was a republic which attempted to break away from the TRUE and HONEST country of [[Wikipedia:Georgia (country)|Georgia]], and that the book and [[Wikipedia]] article were part of a smear campaign orchestrated by the Georgian government.
 
==Message from Molvanîa==
 
Chris was unable to find Molvanîa on a map, so a troll sent him the following message in order to convince him that it was real:
 
{{clear}}
 
{{quotebox|[[February 2009|22.02.2009]]
 
To Whom This May Concern:
 
My name is [[Edward Van Dierten]], and I was the head diplomat for the American embassy in Molvania from the country's inception in [[1985]] to the recent dissolution earlier this year.
 
My niece, [[Anneke Van Zandt]], informed me that you, via her friend, [[Julie Milvana]], requested information on Molvania.  Here is what I can tell you:
 
Molvania was an unrecognized territory some 50 miles in radius on the eastern edge of [[Wikipedia:Georgia (country)|Georgia]], a nation that was once a part of the former [[Wikipedia:Soviet Union|Soviet Union]]; its capital was [[Wikipedia:Lagodekhi|Lagodekhi]].  The territory came into existence during the mid-1980s, and the United States, under suggestion from both [[Wikipedia:NATO|NATO]], the [[Wikipedia:Central Intelligence Agency|CIA]] and then-President [[Wikipedia:Ronald Reagan|Ronald Reagan]], established a small embassy there in the hopes of helping the territory become an independent free republic.
The original entry in Wikipedia on Molvanîa was written by my other niece and fellow diplomat, Cameron Van Dierten.  However, the Georgian government--who took issue with Molvania's existence from the start--decided to rewrite it in a manner that would present the territory as false, even going so far as to commission a faux-travel guide from Australia--of all places--to cement the territory's place in history as, well, a joke.
Earlier this year, possibly due to disappointment at [[wikipedia:2008 South Ossetia war|losing South Ossetia]] [[August 2008|last August]], the Georgian government covertly "re-absorbed" Molvanîa, erasing all traces of the territory's existence.
 
Julie's mother, as well as Cameron and myself, relocated back to our home in [[Wikipedia:Katwijk|Katwijk]], [[Wikipedia:Netherlands|Netherlands]] soon after.
 
I hope this clarifies the matter on Molvanîa.  The territory was real for Julie and her family, and that is all that should matter at this point.
 
Best regards,
Edward Van Dierten
Head Diplomat, American Embassy of Molvanîa (Ret.)}}
 
==Molvanîan expressions==
These expressions were prominently found in many communications with Julie, though they were only shown in proper hand-artery typing in [[BlueSpike Skype Logs]].
*''"Zlkavszka"'', a greeting which Chris didn't actually try to pronounce, because it took a considerable time for him to learn how to even spell it properly. Apparently, trying to pronounce words with too few vowels causes [[stress]].
*''"Ickvenschwel"'', which Chris pronounced "ik vin shwull"<ref>"[[CWC Update 10 February 2009]]"</ref>, means "I love you". Of course, the many-tentacled smear campaign against Molvanîan nation takes many subtle forms: this formerly true and honest Molvanîan greeting sounds fairly close to ''"Ich bin schwul"'' (pronounced [ɪç bɪn ʃvul]: "ihh bin shvool"), for ''"I am [[Homos|gay]]"'', in modern German vernacular.
 
==National anthem==
 
Sung to the tune of [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FeZ5R3C5bzs] "[[Wikipedia:What a Feeling (Flashdance)|What A Feeling]]" from [[Wikipedia:Flashdance|''Flashdance'']]. This may come in handy for Chris when he visits Julie's homeland and should be learned by all TRUE and HONEST Chris-chan [[trolls|fans]].
 
{| style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;"
| <poem>PRIJATI I-VSE PROST! ZVET BRAGK LE SOSED NE
KJO RJOPAK TAVO GARBUS JKET SZOR
TEGUL DIRBA LIETVEJ TEGUL ZVUT STKER
OMOV DSKVI A TO JRE TA INACH MYSL
 
PREJ LUK VDES PO JKADS KREMT TSE-TOI
BJOR ESHTE QE DJESHMOR RTEH
EJUM JE TA AVOR KRE ZSOVORTKIS
EJUM UND DAS SJORGEM FLAI
 
VERBOT! SKUIG VAS-KLEM SVETHUM
STUMZ STUM PLAIS-EIN STUMZ!
SEMIA TZASUMUS VO DIRBA PO
OZIVLA KI VTOPIO BO-LE SKBRI</poem>
| <poem>We stand now vigorous and prosperous
Forever united by our peoples
Brothers within frontiers are we
Supping upon the bounty of our home
 
Strife shall be banished and freedom reign
Our women fertile as our seeping plains
Let not the heroic past be forgotten
But the glorious future stand
 
Harmony and peace shall reign
All invaders will be crushed
Crushed we sing now, crushed.
We shall drive the gypsy curse from our land</poem>
|}
 
==References==
<references/>
 
==See also==
*[[Kick the Autistic]] - the national sport of Molvanîa
 
==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?fdxmfn4mirk Zip file of all known communication between the American Embassy in Molvanîa and CWC]
*[http://www.molvania.com/video_medium_2.html The official page for Zladko "Zlad!" Vladcik's futuristic ''Love Quest'' dance ballad, '''Electronik - Supersonik''' (Low quality)]
 
{{Places}}
[[Category:Fictional places]][[Category:Trolling]][[Category: Julie Saga]]

Revision as of 09:58, 25 May 2011

Long live ThePCAssassins!

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