Difference between revisions of "Imaginary family"

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:''This article is about Chris's stupid imaginary daughter. For Chris's stupid imaginary twin sister, see [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)]].''


[[Image:09-Crystal_Card.jpg|thumb|left|Crystal depicted as a ''[[My Little Pony]]'' character]]
[[Image:CrystalWestonChandler.jpg|thumb|Artist's impression.  This is probably also Chris's impression.  It is also the impression that no one ever wants to see become a reality.]]
{{quote|You see, I have a dream, I have my dream, and that dream is to give birth, to have, to share a daughter with my wife-to-be, and her name would be Crystal.|Chris and his hilarious Freudian slip}}
Around the age of [[2003|21]], [[Chris]] had multiple [[dreams]] in which [[Chris and religion|God and Jesus]] told him to find a [[sweetheart]] to build [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|from the ground up]] to have his '''daughter Crystal''', named after the illustrious "metal", according to him. In a custom ''[[My Little Pony]]'' trading card, Chris depicts Crystal as a pony who traveled back in time to help her father - Chris - find a [[boyfriend-free girl]] (which actually is Chibi Moon's entire premise in ''[[Sailor Moon]]''. So it's yet another concept [[Things Chris has ripped off|Chris has ripped off]]).
This most likely stems from Chris's desire for [[Pedofork|pedophilia]] plus to have a companion who will have to accept him and could understand him. One can only imagine what Chris would do with his "God-Given Daughter" if she was ever born, [[Rape|but the result]] would be very frightening to say the least.
Early justifications for Chris's [[Love Quest]] stemmed from his desire to find a woman who would birth his child, but in recent events, Chris seems to be more [[honest]] in wanting a girlfriend so he can [[fuck quest|get laid]] or prove he's [[homo|straight]].
In a conversation with Chris's ex-gal-pal [[Father Call|Kacey's dad]], Chris revealed that he had the "[[Godjesus|prophetic]]" dream about Crystal when he was seven to nine years old. He reiterates this later, saying he was "definitely in elementary school," when he dreamed about giving birth to a daughter (in the dream he had an office job, which also [[Resume|won't happen]]). "Give birth" slipped out, as in Chris would like to gestate a human female infant within his body, and somehow deliver her into the world.
While it's most likely that Chris just fucked up while talking due to [[stress]] and [[autism]], this could also suggest that Chris has some [[Homos|gender identity issues]], which typically begin in childhood.
During the conversation with Kacey's father, Chris also implied that he may intend to spell the name "C-R-I-S-T-L-E":
<font color="#009966"> '''Dad:'''</font> You know, I don't think, Kacey actually doesn't really like that name. You know, it's kind of a stripper name, Cri-STAL, it's kinda like Cristal, that champagne...
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, no, no, no, it would not, it would not, it would not be Cri-STAL, it would be Cri-STUL. Does that make sense?
<font color="#009966"> '''Dad:'''</font> It's still pretty close.
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's fairly, it does sound close, but it's not, you're not, you're just replacing the C-R-I-S-T-L-E, you're replacing the L-E with an A-L.
It is unclear which spelling he was projecting for his future daughter.
==See also==
*[[Chandler (extended family)]]
*[[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)]]
{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Crystal Weston}}
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]

Revision as of 21:09, 5 April 2010

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