Transgender

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The CWCki continues to refer to Christian only by his true, original gender and GodBear-given name, to keep consistent to Classical records. Other transsexuals are likewise described by their natural sex.
Chris in 2011
Chris in 2016
Chris in 2018, two years after beginning HRT, holding a photo of himself taken a decade ago.

Transgender is defined as "relating to a person whose gender identity does not correspond to that person's biological sex"[1].

In 2011, when Chris was 29 years old, he began exploring male-to-female gender transitioning. Starting with cross-dressing, he would gradually try DIY methods to undergo physical transitioning, which were pointless at best and dangerous at worst. In 2016, he began using legitimate means, such as seeing a professional specializing in gender issues and going on prescription hormone therapy later that year.

Chris's identity gradually shifted over the course of his transitioning. At first, he adapted his previous identity as a heterosexual male, adding a belief that his newfound love of cross-dressing simply made him the male version of a tomboy: a tomgirl. However, it wasn't long before he took it to the next level. In 2014, Chris came out as a "lesbian-identified male", and later, he started calling himself a "trans woman". In 2015, he started going by "Christine", making the name change official the following year, as well as changing the gender marker on his driver's license to Female.

Signs of Gender Dysphoria

Chris describes his 2014 switchover in Sonichu #11

Gender Dysphoria is a feeling of conflict between a person's birth gender and the gender that person identifies as, which entails feeling discomfort over characteristics of the birth gender such as physical aspects or socially-expected roles.

Symptoms in adults last at least six months and can include a belief of experiencing feelings socially associated with the desired gender, as well as wanting to be rid of the primary sex characteristics of the birth gender, have instead the sex characteristics associated with the desired gender, and be treated socially as the desired gender[2].

Chris has exhibited signs of Late-onset Gender Dysphoria, a term describing those who begin to experience Gender Dysphoria in adulthood[3].

Chris choosing between being transgender and being gay, in a 2009 panel from Sonichu 9. Note his personal signature below that statement.

Early signs

Chris's exploration of a female form of himself showed early with his desire to have a daughter named Crystal Weston Chandler. He also added a twin sister (also named Crystal) to the comic who strongly resembles a gender-swapped Chris. The reason behind the name:

“Crystal”: a name that sounds similar to mine, but it has a nice ring to it. [4]

In 2008, years before Chris began to crossdress, he made a remark that he felt some mild discomfort from looking at his own penis.

It's bad enough that I sometimes see my own when I look down (of which I don't feel as much discomfort), but the very sight of others is like kryptonite to me[5]

He also has a long history of female fashions and mannerisms, from the Anime Wings seen in Sonichu Sub-Episode 5 to the Muscle bra. Chris has even wondered what he would be like if he were born a female.[6] In 2008, he posted:

I feel that I am truly in touch with my feminine side, to the point where I am capable of learning from that to better understand how to treat women in a caring, nuturing, positive way; I've also learned from Red Skelton of how to be a gentleman. Sometimes I wonder between my caring attitude and the lack of a Sweetheart if I was born the wrong gender; I would wonder what life would have been like if I had actually been born a girl.[5]

The Butterfly Effect

The catalyst for Chris exploring crossdressing happened around 2011. There is some dispute as to the events that unfolded. According to Champthom[7]:

Someone said to Chris "You should get in touch with your feminine side!" and he ran wild with it.

However, when a fan asked Emily if she was the one to make that comment, she gave a different perspective:

I've jokingly told him that before back when he was a dang dirty male and he would get pissed at me for it. What really kicked off the tomgirl and eventual tranny shit was some rando who was talking to Chris and suggested being a tomgirl since being a guy was too hard for him.[8]

Both of those accounts are consistent with Gender Dysphoria's symptoms of wanting another gender's characteristics and feeling incompatible with a birth gender's social roles.

The dildo harness Chris used for tucking.

Over the next several years, Chris's feelings on his sex characteristics morphed into a loathing of his penis. In 2014, he took to forcing it to stay tucked with a makeshift harness.

Males Offend Me, even my own Penis Totally Grosses Me Out! I am glad that I tuck it underneath my taint, so I do not have to look down at the Ugly Bulge![9]

In 2016, Chris attempted a DIY gender transition using Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis. He was particularly drawn to tracks which claimed to convert a penis to a vagina.

I would feel better knowing if the ovum do get created and further produced after the testies to ovaries transformation. [..] Ugh, we may not know for as late as six months after someone else uses the frequency set, gets herself examined, and confirms it.[10]

Chris's dysphoria and impatience over the Subliminal Frequencies resulted in the self-inflicted taint wound, an episode wherein he cut open his taint with a knife in an attempt to free his vagina.

In 2016, Chris saw a psychologist specializing in gender identity issues. The psychologist confirmed to him that he is transgender[11].

Psychological analysis

Gender dysphoria explains a lot of Chris's past behavior; an example being Chris's insecurity in failing to live up to cultural perceptions of masculinity. His tendency to exaggerate or overcompensate for his fragile masculinity could be caused by subconsciously knowing that his intellectual gender does not match his biological sex. The way Chris interacted during the Kacey calls is another piece of evidence; normally, guys subconsciously lower the pitch of their voices to seem attractive to women, but when Chris was trying to woo Kacey, his voice drifted higher than hers. Additionally, Chris is known for his pathological hatred of change, unless the change is beneficial or positive for him. To assume Chris "became" trans purely for the quest for china is fairly extreme, as suddenly identifying by another gender identity is generally a life-changing event for anybody, and Chris has shown that he is incapable of substantially changing himself even with the promise of a relationship laid in front of him.

There is a correlation between autism and trans identity, though the exact reason for this correlation is still up for debate. According to a Dutch study, 7.8% of trans people are on the spectrum.[12] There are a number of similarities between the two disorders. Many autistic people also tend to have "androgynous" mental qualities (sensitivity in autistic boys, lower empathy in autistic girls), and those people could be perceiving their brain difference as simply having the brain of the opposite gender. Both autistic and trans males tend to have mostly gal-pals, because men tend to be rowdy and more explicitly judgmental.

The transition

Tomgirl

Yes, I am a Tomgirl, and I am damn proud of it. I have embraced and appreciated my feminine side. I am still totally heterosexual. Otherwise, I would be a full-blown you-know-what. [...] I have been more self-confident, and I have a sweet sashay walk, hair and wink flirts, and I am greeting women left and right.
Chris[13]
Also, here is another way to consider me, I am a Ken doll any Barbie CAN dress in her

clothes, and I would feel most comfortable in them and to model them for her. Come shopping with me, sweetie.  ;

Chris, Jackie email, May 6 2011[13]

According to an email Chris sent to Jackie on 26 March 2011, Chris started cross-dressing at the beginning of that month.[13] On 30 March 2011, Chris changed his PSN quote to the CWC-ism "I am Tomgirl".

PSN quote

On 29 April, the Tomgirl Pictures were released by Surfshack Tito. In them, Chris is dressed in woman's clothing, posing in what he believes are seductive positions. For some reason, Chris removed the Tomgirl PSN quote immediately after PSN came back online after a month of inactivity on 14 May, possibly due to receiving attention from trolls.

On 16 August 2011, Chris recorded Kaka Makeup Basics, a makeup tutorial video, reinforcing his tomgirl identity.

To show his support to all Tomgirls and Tomboys of America, he started up a new band, Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls, consisting of a TomGirl Robee (formerly Robbie, now Roberta), and TomBoy Cera and Christine.

Lesbian-identified male

On 14 August 2014, Chris revealed via Facebook that he was a self-described "Tomgirl, Intersex of Female Soul with Male Body, and a Tranny Cross-Dresser", posting shortly afterward to be a lesbian in a male body[14]. He also proclaimed that he is a supporter of "LBT" rights, which seems to have neatly coincided with the advent of his professed status as a transgender person. His omission of the "G" (Gay) was attacked by Kim, in the face of which Chris admitted that the "G.M.s" were "fortunate" to be "on the boat", suggesting that he hadn't yet changed his views on gay men.

In July 2014, Chris had a vision, while meditating, about being a lesbian in a past life[15]. He took it as a sign affirming his gender identify. Years later, in a 2019 interview, he said:

I had, exhibited but not totally realized my uh, feminine habits and traits and then it became more apparent to me that I was definitely soulfully a woman, due to the vision I had where I saw myself in a past lifetime by the tree at Woodstock and I was a woman then so yep, I'm soulfully a woman, so, so it's a good thing to go on from there and I never regretted it.[16]

In September 2014, a fan inquired on his preferred gender and pronouns. Chris replied that he was very comfortable being referred to by either pronoun, adding that he would be flattered at being mistaken as a woman. He added that he did not currently have plans to change his name[17]

He began going to the Impulse Gay Social Club in fall 2014.

During 2014, Chris was contemplating gender reassignment surgery.

I Hate Being Born A Male, and after I have my children, I am getting an Organ Sex Change Operation!
Chris[18]

He tried to fulfill the prophecy of Crystal's birth by using a sperm bank, however, the bank rejected him[19]

Lesbian transwoman

I am a (Female Soul) Transwoman (no operation yet), And a Lesbian.
Chris, January 2015[20]
Chris(tine)'s new driver's license and "woman card." His signature is surprisingly neat considering the quality of his art. Also, the woman card probably looks great next to his autism card.

In spring 2015, Chris changed his mind on his pronoun and name and referred to himself as Christine, a Lesbian TransWoman, using female pronouns[21]

In May 2015, Chris turned his fursona, Chris-chan Sonichu, into a Lesbian Transwoman. He also wrote about a fantasy in which Chris-chan Sonichu impregnates himself with his own semen to produce two children[22].

After being rejected as a sperm donor the previous year, Chris tried his own DIY method to preserve his sperm for the possibility of gender surgery. Chris's Specimen Sample is a video of him showing off his collection of semen in Tupperware containers in his kitchen freezer, and dates on the containers indicate he was doing this for at least nine months, though this was futile as the sperm was destroyed by placing it in a home freezer.

In May 2016, he successfully filed for a name change to "Christine Weston Chandler."[23] Later, with the help of his gender psychologist, he also filed paperwork with the DMV for a new driver's license identifying him as female, which was granted[24].

Chris was unaware that he also had the option to update his birth certificate; upon finding out, he decided not to, stating:

I had no idea one can update their birth certificate too. For me though, I’d leave mine the way it is, because I am not going to deny my own history and past. I was born male, and dubbed “Christopher”, but I realized I was female the whole time and changed my name to “Christine” soon enough. And to have those on my drivers license is good enough for me.[25]

The self-inflicted taint wound, Chris's attempt to free his imaginary vagina, happened in summer 2016. In fall, Chris began taking HRT[26].

He attended LGBT events such as Cville Pride, Love is Love and UVA Remembers Pulse, and considered himself to be a member of the SLGBTQ community.

Bisexual transwoman

Main article: Bisexual

In early 2018, Chris suddenly announced that he identified as bisexual rather than lesbian - the result of brainwashing from the Idea Guys to make Chris think he was in relationships with fictional male characters.

List of Chris's MTF transition methods

Chris's menstrual pads

Chris has made several attempts to transition into a true and honest woman. Unfortunately for him, he has a strong belief in junk science and miracle cures. As a result, his initial favored methods produced no benefits or were harmful to his health.

In 2016, he saw a psychologist over his gender transition.[11]

Voice

Chris has been making an effort to feminize his voice, but instead of pulling off a convincing femme voice like some other trans women (or simply just not bothering, given his voice is naturally high on its own, and there are trans women who have chosen not to get voice treatments), he talks with a Mickey Mouse falsetto. The falsetto often drops down to his old voice at some point in a given video, sometimes as soon as he introduces himself. He has also ditched his monotone speech pattern for an extreme sing-song tone, especially when he adds bits of random-access humor. In Q&A NO MORE, he continued to affect a feminine voice when he was yelling, resulting in a cartoonish witch-like scream.

Hormone therapy

At first, between 2015 through fall 2016, Chris attempted using Oestrogel as a DIY hormone therapy method. Since Oestrogel is a hormone replacement gel meant for menopausal women, and Chris's self-regimen consisted of slathering entirely too much of the medication on himself, any effects were questionable and a potential health risk.

Chris eventually went on a prescribed HRT treatment consisting of estradiol and spironolactone[27] around the fall of 2016.[26] The Man in the Pickle Suit explained:

Basically if you say the right things to a therapist for a few months, they'll write you a recommendation for HRT and send you to an endocrinologist. Chris was referred to one at UVA. They gave him a script and made him sign away liability (the "informed consent" part).[28]

Chris also mentioned taking hormones to Idea Guy:

I can say that Chris knows the fact that he shortened his lifespan taking those hormones. In fact, I wouldn’t say he’s suicidal, so much as he’s fine with the idea he could die sooner. I dunno if it counts as his view of reality, but Chris thinks he might be able to have a baby once the transition is complete (I have nothing to do with that. Chris said it’s a possibility he could get pregnant).[29]

Chris's health insurance, the taxpayer-funded Medicare program, covers HRT[30]

Reactions

Parents

A panel from Sonichu 12 of an autobiographical narrative of Chris coming out as a tomgirl to his parents.

Chris's parents were not happy when Chris began crossdressing. Bob "threw the damned 'fag' card" at Chris.[31] Barbara made negative remarks, such as, "I didn't raise a daughter,"[31] "do not wear eye shadow", "you look like a prostitute", "lipstick makes you look like a hooker", "you're turning into a gay", "what are you piercing next?", and "what's next, you wearing a skirt and high heels?"[32]

Barbara also tried to pay Chris to stop wearing panties and go back to wearing briefs - however, Chris refused[33].

During May 2011, an angry Barbara chopped Chris's hair short in a failed attempt to stop his crossdressing, prompting Chris to call her a bitch[34]:

My mother comes upstairs and yells at me about how She Thinks I'm turning queer from being Tomgirly and Feminine, AND she fears that I would kill her. Hand to God, I would never kill Anyone, including my own mother and father. Violence and Murder is Rarely the answer; murder is Morally Wrong; I care about my mother and father Very Much. And even worse, she threatens to kill me in her episode of emotional rage. She also took my keys. And shortly later, she tells me to come downstairs, so I go; she tells me to sit down, and she does the worse thing that broke the last straw on my camel's back, she Cuts my Long Hair Short and Butchered. After seeing the butchered hair in the mirror, I was soo in shock, I wield the double-edge sword I have been holding in for weeks since a much earlier fit of emotional rage of hers. I called her a Bitch. With her as a bitch, that makes me a son of a bitch, and it hurts me deep too. My hair is soo bad, I have to wear my PaRappa wool hat to cover the whole mess when I go out; I can not be seen in public with this short-hair mess.

Chris then remarked, "I forgave her for the butchering of my hair today, but now while I still care and love her like a child for a mother, sadly there is now a Mutual lack of deep trust between us."

Before Bob passed away in the fall of 2011, he told Chris he accepted and loved him for who he is[35].

Over the next few years, Barbara remained opposed to Chris's crossdressing. Chris stated in 2014: "I would cross dress more often if my mother was not against me doing it (panties and bra included, but wear them anyway)."[36] However, Barbara's resistance gradually diminished and Chris resumed openly crossdressing. When Chris legally changed his name to Christine in 2016, he did so behind Barb's back, though she later found out and was livid with him[37]

Chris's gender identity may be the only significant thing in which he has successfully resisted the will of his parents.

Locals

In May 2011, Chris recounted an experience where he got yelled at by a jerkop for going to the women's restroom, and said that, though he felt embarrassed, he would continue using the women's restroom while crossdressing as "there is no goin' back for me."[38].

In June 2011, Chris was shopping at Sheetz when a man, seeing him in his crossdressing attire, asked him if he was gay, to which an upset Chris replied, "No, I AM a Tomgirl."[39]

In a January 2019 tweet, Chris claimed his neighbor "across the street from me shouted angrily at me; blaming me for his child questioning their Gender Identity." [40]

Fans

Chris's fans and followers generally have a negative view of Chris's transition, with many questioning whether it is legitimate or not, and tend to refer to Chris using male pronouns and his pre-transition name, a trend extending to this very wiki.

Effect on the Love Quest

And for nothing more than the experience, you may give me a try in private. Protected and no penetration required. I have an open mind for what you may desire. traditional for the straight women. clit-rubbing and pussy eating for the lesbians. And any way for the bisexual women. Massages, making out, lots of attention and eye contact, and whatever else desired, for all Women regardless of orientation!
Chris, May 2015[41]
And one can view the male part like an extended clitoris, regardless of what it actually is. Put a condom on it, and rub the side against a clitoris, not only Really does good for me, but I imagine and empathize stimulating for her as well.
Chris[41]

Chris felt that his gender orientation would widen his potential dating pool to women of all sexual orientations, but in reality it would have the opposite effect and restrict it to lesbian women who want to date MTF transwomen.

Influence from the LGBT community

Chris followed a Facebook account named Lizzy the Lezzy. In September 2015, he liked a post linking to a clickbait article about a vibrating bra with the claim it could increase breast size in a week[42]. A few months later, Chris made his own vibrating bra contraption[43].

He also followed LGBT News. In May 2017, he commented on a post from them which linked to a theoretical article about a possible surgery for trans-women to become pregnant[44].

Ah-Ha! I Knew it! I can eventually be a mother! :)

Chris also followed outspoken members of the trans community on Twitter and sometimes agrees with their statements.

One such example is when LifeofBria claimed that trans women have periods:

Nobody teaches trans girls about our periods. We just get these weird times where we're moody and crampy and sad and we don't know why and just chalk it up to another reason we're not good enough in life. So, just so you all know: Trans. Girls. Get. Periods.

Chris answered:

Yes we do. Even the possible hot flashes are no fun either. I’m feeling some of my period today. At least they pass and we can feel better when they do. 😊[45]

Deadname

I'm neutral about people calling me "Chris" or "Christine" but I would like if you Good People would respect my chosen name.
Chris's paradoxical thoughts on the matter.[46]
***Christine*** you FUCKING INTERNET DOUCHEWHORE!
Chris[47]

During his transition, Chris has occasionally become annoyed at people for referring to him as Chris instead of Christine, despite the fact that Chris (as a short form name) is unisex.[48][46]

In the comic

Robbie Sonichu has a storyline in Sonichu 12 about his gender transition which closely mirrors Chris's own, from identifying as male, to tomgirl, to lesbian transwoman. Chris Chan Sonichu and Christian Weston Chandler (comic character) are also changed to canonically transgender - becoming pregnant and bearing children via self-insemination[22]. Sonichu 12 features a short autobiographical narrative of Chris's gender transition at the conclusion of Episode 26.

Gallery

Fan art

See also

References

  1. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/transgender
  2. https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/gender-dysphoria/what-is-gender-dysphoria
  3. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/conditions/gender-dysphoria
  4. Chris Chan's Public Announcement
  5. 5.0 5.1 Sonichu Girls
  6. Mailbag 27 - Is Chris hitting on Bailey Jay?
  7. https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Talk:Tomgirl_Pictures#Just_a_clarification
  8. https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/post-4722372
  9. Un-clit
  10. Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis
  11. 11.0 11.1 Chris changed the gender marker on his driver's license to identify him as female in 2016. The procedure to do this in Virginia is to have a professional vouch the patient is in gender transition on this form. Also mentioned by Chris in a Sonichu 12 page
  12. https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2016/11/the-link-between-autism-and-trans-identity/507509/
  13. 13.0 13.1 13.2 Jackie E-mails 24
  14. August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out...kinda
  15. File:SchuComic12-1P68.jpg
  16. Jackson Dalton
  17. https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sept-2014-chris-answers-name-change-and-pronoun-questions.9012/
  18. Colin Chat 1
  19. Open Relationship E-mails#Need my daughter
  20. January 2015 Facebook posts#Baby, Chris Was Born This Way
  21. https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-4-21-15-christine-updates-her-facebook-gender.9103/
  22. 22.0 22.1 May 2015 Facebook posts#Meet Russel and Cynthia
  23. https://kiwifar.ms/threads/chris-filed-for-a-legal-name-change-update-the-judgement-is-in.20763/
  24. https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2016_Facebook_posts#Christine.27s_Driver.27s_License_and_Woman.27s_Card
  25. https://twitter.com/NightStar2891/status/1034472015942565888
  26. 26.0 26.1 September 2017 tweets#Chris insists he's on HRT
  27. Sachumo Interview
  28. https://kiwifarms.net/threads/dimensional-merge-tweets-megathread.49414/page-40#post-4018237
  29. Idea Guy Q&A
  30. https://transequality.org/know-your-rights/medicare
  31. 31.0 31.1 Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Coming out to my parents
  32. Jackie E-mails 24
  33. Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Mothers
  34. Jackie E-mails 26
  35. File:SchuComic12-1P68.jpg
  36. According to Chris's OkCupid profile
  37. Comment by Arthur Spatchcock at https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-6-11-cwcville-shopping-is-on-vacation.21491/post-1518208
  38. Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Girly Things Tee Hee
  39. Jackie E-mails 28
  40. https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1088995002221559808
  41. 41.0 41.1 May 2015 Facebook posts
  42. https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-9-7-2015-chris-may-be-interested-in-magical-vibrating-titty-enhancers.12422/
  43. December 2015 Facebook Posts#Remote and Wired Vibrating Eggs
  44. May 2017 Facebook posts
  45. https://twitter.com/cwcsonichu/status/1016786884192808962
  46. 46.0 46.1 May 2018 social media posts#Mad at Facebook friends
  47. May 2018 social media posts#Meltdown on Twitter
  48. https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-thoughts-questions.661/page-601#post-1615438