SingStar Challenge

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Who will prevail?

CWC Challenge was a video competition between Ian Brandon Anderson (IBAChandler) and Liquid Chris to determine who is the real CWC.

Because Ian was too much of a pussy to challenge CChanSonichuCWC to a proper duel like a Southern gentleman, he had opted instead for a singing competition, like Southern homos.

The genesis of the contest was when Liquid outshined Ian by playing a real guitar, whereas the latter merely did a Guitar Hero rendition. Butthurt that Chris had an actual talent, Ian decided he could one-up Chris by using his vocal skills.[1]

Happily, Ian couldn't have chosen a worse medium to duel through, as he is so tone deaf he doesn't even realize that he is tone deaf. Ian believed his singing voice had "a Frank Sinatra or Bing Crosby flavor,"[2] so he seemed to believe that he was a shoo-in to win.

Announcement

Because it's totally fair that Ian gets to set the rules to a competition he's competing in without even asking his opponent if the terms are acceptable, Ian laid out in great detail the rules of engagement:

Even to slow-in-the-minds, it's clear that several rules contradict themselves immediately, such as not being allowed karaoke equipment but being allowed to play the song itself in the background. This still hasn't stopped Ian from stuffing up.

Watch

SingStar Challenge Announcement
Stardate 15 August 2009
Subject Matter MusicMusic Music
Saga LiquidLiquid Liquid Saga
Shirt Classic ShirtClassic Shirt The Classic
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous
That Goatee WILL Grow Back
next
Sonic Boom
Game on. ¡Abre la contesta!

Transcript

Alright, Christian, Mr. Brown-Striped Impostor, since you have been able to accept and complete my question challenges, it is time to issue a new challenge. I challenge you in a SingStar competition. The rules are simple. We are to each pick one song out of our libraries, our own playlists, and sing them verbatim with out any printed lyrics and with out any karaoke. 'Quipment.

(picks up camera)

And I will show you right now how fair I am. My room layout.

(pans around his overstuffed-with-junk room)

No karaoke equipment whatsoever.

(camera returns to Ian in frame)

(sigh) And if it-and also we must have the mp3s played behind us, so therefore no musical instruments its so-what so ever in any video. And... only... in song number five, no song before, we [sigh] will allow each other to pick one song and challenge the other with that song. And the deadline for each uh, up, each uploaded song is etsa-approximately 24 hours from the previous one. So your song number one will, the deadline for that will be 24 hours after I upload and p-start my first st-song. [sigh] So, with that we will soon be commencing with the first track, "Sonic Boom" [holds up "Sonic CD" cover]

(jump cut)

And with that I will be showing you my li'l lay out

(camera once again turns to Ian's crap-laden room)

my speakers over there,

(camera moves to show some Lego bricks)

my camera will sit here

(camera moves back to Ian)

the only thing that I ask anotherly—anotherly in this, no separate microphones but only the microphones on our webcamps. [holds up a mirror to reflect the camera]

(jump-cut to Ian setting down the camera facing his bed and sits down into frame)

(jump-cut to Ian once again holding the camera on himself making the last jump cut meaningless)

Oh, I forgot one thing, you may use your mp3 player of choice. My PSP is mine, attached to my speakers.

(Ian once again sets down the camera)

You may show me yours in your first video, Mr. Christian.

(jump cut)

Any mutiny against the rules I have set forth in this video will be [sigh] [dramatic glasses removal] not countable. And you will have to do it all over again.

(jump cut to Ian throwing his glasses)

And so with that

(jump cut to Ian removing his vest and throwing it behind him)

[starting to remove square medallion] Ow! [removes square medallion, holds it up to the camera to read: The Good Life) [starts to shave goatee dry] [after eleven seconds the head comes off the razor, Ian reattaches it and continues shaving, then sets razor down]

(jump cut)

[one second into new scene razor head falls off again, Ian reattaches again and continues to shave until goatee is mostly gone]

(jump cut)

(jump cut)

—rst thing, no imported music. Which means no Japanese, no Spanish, no German, no odd country language. Only English. Shame, would loved to play "Sailor Star" or "Flame Sniper" [makes motion as if getting ready to fire an arrow from a bow]

(jump cut)

And also, once a song has been sung, of that specific title, from that specific band, it will not be reusable in a future song. Neither by you, neither by me. Abide by the rules.

(jump cut)

[Ian is once again holding the razor] Game on. ¡Abre la contesta! [Spanish for "Let the contest begin!", except that "contesta" is not a Spanish word; "¡Abre el concurso!" would be correct.]

Rounds

Round IBAChandler's song CChanSonichuCWC's song
Round 1 "Sonic Boom" from Sonic the Hedgehog CD "You're Pitiful" by "Weird Al" Yankovic
Round 2 "Don't Say You Love Me" by M2M "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" by Will Smith
Round 3 "Autumn Goodbye" by Britney Spears "Heaven" by Bryan Adams
Round 4 "The Touch" by Stan Bush "Think Twice" by EVƎ 6
Round 5 "Can I Smell Yo Dick?" by Riskay
(Opponent's request)
"Lift your Eyes" by Planetshakers
(Opponent's request)

Awaiting the judges' ruling

After round five finished, Ian began a campaign against CChanSonichuCWC on various fronts, mainly through video:

  • A "direct" confrontation between him and CChanSonichuCWC:
    • Exposing Jeff, where by his "detective work" he finds that CChanSonichuCWC's true name is "Jeff": this name is a callback to a previous trolling affair.
    • CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!, a video that shows the rage held by Ian over the accomplishments of his rival. He tries to demotivate CChanSonichu by using his girlfriend, Kacey, as a deterrent.
    • CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC, where he threatens legal persecution and gives some anecdotes about his life, mainly his name change and again mentions Kacey.
    • LOOK at the truth!, where he tries a comparison between him and CChanSonichuCWC, acknowledging and reaffirming his failures. This is also a video that shows a side of Ian few people have the fortune of not seeing: his manboobs.
  • Trying to steal Kacey from CChanSonichuCWC, by the pretense of her being in love to the "Real Deal" Chris and not the impostor. This resulted in the following videos:

CChanSonichuCWC was not happy with these events and began his crusade for vindication:

  • A telephone conversation between him and Ian, where he tries to convince Ian that he is a impostor and should stop impersonating him. Ian, like in his previous video loses it again, threatening CChanSonichuCWC with the police and involving Bob in this debacle.
  • His own final warning against Ian. CChanSonichuCWC shows his anger against the impersonator, exposing his faults and weaknesses. This video is notable for including a The Matrix reference, relating to Chris's 'real name', "Ian Brandon Anderson".

The Winner

Watch

"I (CWC) WIN the SingStar Contest"
Stardate 11 August 2009
Subject Matter Music.png Music
Shirt Brownstripeshirt.png Brown
Liquid Chris' videos
previous
Ian, Talking Time is Over. The REAL Christian Weston Chandler is SICK of Your Lies. Come CLEAN.
next
I, Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, Virginia, Have Grown Up


I declare myself the winner of the Singstar Challenge!

Transcript

Captain's Log, Stardate: August 11th, 2009

Hello my loyal fanbase, I would like to address the impostor, Ian Brandon Anderson, for a moment. I officially declare myself the winner of the SingStar Challenge contest between because your judges have not followed my rules—followed not—followed not—not followed any rules or uploaded any videos. My judges have been following the rules and giving me scores, therefore because you don't have any scores you're out of the running and I am the true Christian Weston Chandler. Now, I dun care if you're stealing my original works, and comic pages and arts, and uploading them to a dimpy little website where no one will see them, bec—while the true comics are about to be published by Dark Horse Comics. Yes, you heard it right, Dark Horse is wary fent—they are working fenderlessly, furiously, to create and draw and write the first Sonichu Episode 0 comic within accordance from Sega and Nintendo. Now they are also working with a certain Microsoft as well. My current on the project is they may hire me as production manager. So, you know, keep my fingers crossed. And another thing, I present to you another true Sonichu merchandise selling site is cwcstore.blogspot.com and it's your one stop shop for anything Sonichu, Rosechu or CWCville related. I will show you a bit of the site right here. And on another note there uh uh gonna start selling Lego sets of CWCville along with uh, guides to the city. So, uh, be looking forward to that one, true believers! The uh, Sonichu Crystal Chronicles games has come along pretty well. It's going to a, uh, RPG-style game, a role playing game, and outside the city of CWCville. And, uh, it is currently being produced in tandem with Microsoft for the-mm, X-box 360. Look forward to the official revealing of it in the uh Da-Dallas Game Developers Conference. Ehm, anyways, uh, anyway, yeh, that's about it for now. Still making lots of money, rol—rolling in the—rolling in the dough, ya know and uh, WHO KNOWS WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS?

And to my, my darling sweetheart Kacey, eventual, a light a magical lighthouse is randomly shone is a healing, guiding light upon previously shattered heart and tortured soul, and mending them back into good shape and form. One girl walked into my life like a sailor soldier who had just vanquished a heart snatcher. Bit by bit, I've noticed you're shining, lustrous hair, you're shiny blue Chaos Emerald-like eyes and personality—strong and caring, like a true buttercup bloom. I followed my recovered heart's instincts and followed you. As I got to know you over the months and my heart was growing stronger as I was falling for you. I blushed more strawberry pink than I ever had before and everything was shining like a sun's mellow color, yellow. For you I would travel even a thousand miles just to be with ya. Fortunately you lives only about 2 hours away from my house and uh, I meet you when we dates. This feeling that was, and still is, so pure and true, it's as if I was born to love you. When you smiles I feel like I'm walking on sunshine and I give my replying smile and gaze into your eyes. And your hair is the softest and most warm tingling. Cloud nine? I feel like I'm on ten! Kacey my love, will you marry me? Peace

Aftermath

After losing the contest, Ian uploaded The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who, where he pulled a massive retcon out of his ass and said the contest was just for fun.

This successful saga marked a new take on previous attempts to make Ian believe that someone else was taking all the fame and glory of his Sonichu creation. By confronting a doppelgänger who was successful in everything he tried to be, Ian began to show a violent side of his psyche. While fruitlessly trying to prove that he was the TRUE and HONEST person, his actions produced a surge of content unparalleled to anything produced in 2009, even to point of jump-starting the production of Sonichu #9.

Sauces

CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009 CWCivil War! SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE