User:LlorTroll
The Tales of Chris W. Chandler
Chapter One: The Prank Call
Writer: Mushkin
It was a typical day in the lawless town called CWCville. The Mayor woke up from the bed and realised that he just crapped both his briefs and the bed he sleeps on!
"Sigh! I blame those dang dirty trolls for this!" Chris complains, never being one to accept responsibility for his own actions, "Oh well, I'll just get Mom to take care of the mess."
Chris struggled to lift up the mattress to take the sheets off, and decided to just sit down on the Sulking Couch, and phone his mom to come up, since he's too much of a lazy shit to actually hop downstairs himself. As Chris reached out to grab the phone it went off.
The person at the other end of the phone is a vicious JERK! People call him Joe the Troll, wearer of the dreaded idiot hat! A creation of another internet celebrity who is loved by his TRUE and HONEST fanbase and loathed by the evil trolls who torment him on a daily basis.
After ten minutes of Mass Debating, Chris decideds to finally pick up the phone. He askes who is ringing him at this time of day and Joe the Troll responds.
"We're on to you!" Joe says.
"Who is this?" Chris askes, confused.
"I am a member of the Self Righteous Right Winged Douchebags, or SRRWD for short, and I'm not at all happy with your shenanigans." Joe responds.
"UGH! Another dang troll who wants to play America's favorite game of KICK THE AUTISTIC!!" Chris moans.
"You don't even know what I look like you dirty old pervert! We have evidence of your pedophilia and will be taking action against you shortly!" Joe says, another troll behind him starts to laugh.
"I am NOT a PEDOFORK! You damn fucking retarded TROLL!" Chris yells down the phone.
"Explain why you drew pictures of 16 year old Sonichu and 15 year old Rosechu having ungodly sex with each other, explain the existence of 14 year old poorly dressed Zapina and the remark by Rosechu regarding child pornography laws being 'dumb'!" Joe says with a smile on his face, Chris will be struggling to wriggle his way out of this one.
"Firstly, Sonichu and Rosechu are NOT underaged! They are old enough to have sex. Secondly Zapina is NOT poorly dressed and is not engaging in any sexual activity, you dirty trolling pedofork!" Chris says aggressively.
Joe sniggered at Chris's pathetic retort, as does everyone else in the room.
"You retconned their ages after you drew those images of Sonichu and Rosechu having sex, so they were underaged at the time, first rebuttal destroyed!" Joe said, Chris started sweating like a pig as Joe prepared himself to destroy his second rebuttal.
"I.."
"Zapina looks scantily clad to me, just look at the way she dresses! You have to be blind or a pedo to not see that she's dressed like a hooker. Quite frankly I'm leaning towards the latter given your notoriety." Joe said, "And while she isn't engaging in any sexual acts, she was still using her ass as a torchlight! Offscreen thankfully, but still!"
"SHUT UP TROLL!" Chris screamed into the phone as he grabbed his boner in fear.
"Now, explain while even though you discovered one of your 'friends' on MySpace was underaged, you still tried to go after her." Joe said with a smirk on his face.
"Oh noooo!" Chris cried out, the STRESS was making his bowels go weak. Unfortunately he isn't wearing any briefs at all. He took one final breath, and a stream of diaarhea blasted from his ass all over the chair he was sitting on!
Joe had an evil smirk on his face as he heard the gush of diaarhea and Chris's complaining as he struggled to get his fat ass of the chair. Unfortunately the tape ran out so Joe couldn't record any more, so he cut the call.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" Chris screamed at the ceiling as his socks got soaked in a massive puddle of his own shit.
END
Chapter Two: A trip to Gamestop
Writer: LlorTroll
The next day Chris goes out on a journey to The GAMe PLACe to talk to the manager to have himself unbanned from the store.