Difference between revisions of "Cole Smithy"
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Further reading divulged the possibility of a touching family reunion between Chris and Cole as soon as [[Bob Chandler]] "drops fucking dead". This will occur as the result of a self inflicted bludgeoning from a moonshine bottle. | Further reading divulged the possibility of a touching family reunion between Chris and Cole as soon as [[Bob Chandler]] "drops fucking dead". This will occur as the result of a self inflicted bludgeoning from a moonshine bottle. | ||
Revision as of 15:13, 10 February 2009
Chris' Half-Brother
Cole Smithy is Chris' half-brother, who despite sharing chromosomes with Chris and being raised by the same horrible mother seems to be a pretty normal guy.
Barbara gave birth to Cole when she was around 20 years old and was raised by her and a stepfather only known as "Jerry", whom both apparently beat the shit out of Cole on a regular basis.
At some point, Barbara, ever the good Christian, abandoned Cole and has rarely seen him since. Cole now understandably hates her guts, but even more so now because Barbara refuses to divulge the identity of his biological father. Cole has tried numerous times to find out exactly who his biological father is, but each time Barbara either hangs up on him or gets Chris to lie to him for her.
From Chris' hacked email account, Chris offered to get the truth out of Barbara, but only if Cole would vote for him in his stupid PaRappa contest. Chris did ask his mother about it, but apparently she lied once again. Chris himself was more interested in the PaRappa contest than his brother's plight, showing just how self-absorbed he truly is.
Further reading divulged the possibility of a touching family reunion between Chris and Cole as soon as Bob Chandler "drops fucking dead". This will occur as the result of a self inflicted bludgeoning from a moonshine bottle.