13 Lucky Writing Tips

“	1. Use standard written English. ... 4. The thesis statement es el finallié estancé de íntroductóry paragraphé. ... 13. Cheques tu escribir muy carefully.	”
Selected writing tips

The paper.

13 Lucky Writing Tips is a school paper detailing a list of techniques to improve rhetoric. It is likely Chris simply wrote them down as a teacher read them off, as he begins disregarding them as soon as tip #4, switching from standard written English to Spanish in order to flex his Peggy Hill-esque grasp on the language. It is possible that Chris actually invented a new kind of grammatical error: for most learners of a new language it is a common mistake to use false cognates (a word that seems like a word in their own language but has a completely different meaning), but Chris pushes the envelope by using assumed cognates, words that don't exist in the language at all, that Chris made up. Thus, this document is a candid example of Chris's poor grasp of the Spanish language.

Transcription

Christian W. Chandler 1/19/99 English, 1 13 Lucky Writing Tips: Use standard written English. Do not use contractions in formal writing. You must have a thesis statement in each essay. The thesis statement es el finallié sentenc estancé de íntroductóry paragraphé. Tú escribes de literáture, el thesis inclúr el [illegible] llama de author y llama de work. Los paragraphs support y relaté qúe el thesis. Los paragraphs tienes el topic estancés, hablan el unifying concepto de el paragraph. Los details support y relate a el topic estánce de paragraph. Neccisitas los adequáte supporte details. Escribe el literáture en presénte tense. Necisitas tres muchaco point mirar de pointé. Necisitas creas muy bein tu escribes cree sense y es muy logicál. Cheques tu escribir muy carefully.

Mistakes

Line 4

-finallié would go after estancé if estancé was a noun, however estancé literally translates to stagnated, it is clear Chris believes it means sentence, the correct word is sentencia, also the word is final.

-The Spanish equivalent of introductory is, believably introductorio and the word for paragraph is parráfo.

Line 5

-Chris neglects to conjugate "escribes" into the imperative escribe.

-The Spanish form of thesis is spelled tesis.

-He misspells and erroneously uses the infinitive form of incluir.

-He uses llama as the translation for name, anyone who has been to one day at a Spanish class likely knows that llama is a verb and means call, while the correct word would be nombre. Furthermore, if llama were a noun it would be feminine and addressed with the feminine article la.

Line 6

-Chris uses the words support and relaté in lieu of apoyan and relacionan.

-Erroneously uses paragragh and thesis.

Line 7

-Chris uses the 2nd person singular (you) conjugation for tener.

-Uses paragraph and estancés as well as the word unifying when the word is "unificando", also unifying" is an adjective and would go after concepto.

-When the words de and el are used consecutively they are combined into del.

Line 8

-The Spanish word for details is detalles, Chris also uses support, relaté, estancé, and paragraph.

-He uses topic when he means tema.

-Doesn't combine a and el into al.

Line 9

-The word for adequate is adecuado.

-He repeats support and details.

Line 10

-The Spanish word for literature is literatura and is feminine.

-Again Chris puts the adjective before the noun like in English.

-Uses tense when he means tiempo.

Line 11

-Chris begins speaking French somehow, and uses the French word for very, tres, and uses muchaco instead of mucho, literally writing "very boy".

-He uses points/pointe when he means punto.

-It is not clear what the sentence is supposed to mean but it is wrong in some way.

Line 12

-This sentence makes no sense, it is not clear what verb he meant, but creer means to think or believe.

Line 13

-While this may be the most correct line, the Spanish word for carefully is cuidadosamente.

-Cheques is not conjugated into the imperative cheque.