Talk:Michael Hirtes

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Since Hirtes has many flaws in common with Chris, I wonder why the former hates the latter so much; anyone got any ideas? Steampunk Mage (talk) 19:07, 31 October 2017 (UTC)

  • It's exactly because he has so much in common with Chris. The original A-Log was the same way. They're obsessed with hating people who are more visible or famous for failing at life to distract from the fact that they actually fail harder at it. Ericitos Verdes (talk) 21:18, 31 October 2017 (UTC)
    • Or maybe he's jealous that Chris, a more infamous lolcow, has more success in life than him (since Chris is now profiting from his Sonichu merchandise)? That might also have wounded his pride. Steampunk Mage (talk) 21:26, 5 December 2017 (UTC)

Which of the links are dead?

They seem to be working for me. Hurtful Truth Level (talk) 20:08, 1 November 2017 (UTC)

There seems to be no source for Hirtes's criminal records. -Camille 23:46, 1 November 2017 (PDT)

The Kiwi Farms thread on him (#2 in References) has screencaps of the records in the OP. Hurtful Truth Level (talk) 07:10, 2 November 2017 (UTC)

I see what you mean. I've taken down the dead link tag, and put the website for finding his criminal records in the external references.-Camille 0:51, 2 November 2017 (PDT)

Hirtes' Quotes

Do you think it is a good idea to add a section of some of his notable tweets or other quotes involving Chris? -Larry the Larryhog (talk) 02:40, 10 January 2018 (UTC)

Common attacks

Should we include information regarding Hirtes's common reasons for attacking Chris, just to illustrate just how unoriginal and aggravating he is? Hirtes has somewhat of an obsession with mentioning how he pepper-sprayed the Yellow-Shirted Fiend, an onslaught of diseases and ailments that Chris most likely doesn't have anymore, Chris supposedly not caring for the cats, him fucking the blowup doll in For Julie's Eyes only, the House Fire, etc. Either the dude has no clue the year 2014 is over, or he really is that lazy to keep up with the times. - PsychoNerd054


  • Yeah, that sounds good. Maybe put this quote in somewhere - "(and BTW Kiwis. Don't care if Fatty is reading these or not. Others obviously are, and that's matters.)" Shows that he's trying to ween Chris by bothering everyone he tweets to. Hurtful Truth Level (talk) 23:41, 11 January 2018 (UTC)
  • Personally I disagree. Hirtes' motives is no different from your average ween, but you don't have to listen to me. -Larry the Larryhog (talk) 02:44, 12 January 2018 (UTC)

Kiwi Farms Socks

I think we should add Hirtes' Kiwi Farms socks. These are listed in the Cwcki Club. -Larry the Larryhog (talk) 20:15, 28 March 2018 (UTC)


I am compelled to agree, any and all information about this person of interest should be included, especially if any of it relates back to Chris. DarkWestern (talk) 01:46, 27 July 2019 (UTC)